#sorry I had you removed from the DJ gig

[musicinthebranchesoftheveins]

JBR, I could never forget you, and even if we aren't reconnecting in this lifetime, I'll love you for the rest of my days.

[peaches-writes]

naturally

description: there’s something about bang chan, even if he’s not some senior crush you’ve pined over from the very beginning or a friend you’ve known forever, that just makes realizing that you’re in love with him as something that feels right member: chan genre: fluff, slice of life, high school au, college au, friends to lovers au, sports au (off season universe), campus dj au (if u squint), slow burn (?), fem reader word count: 12k wtf warning: explicit language, alcohol, a plot that makes zero sense note: idk what this is it’s so messy anw + @skzwriternet​

Chan came in your life quite late—both literally and figuratively.

The two of you were in the 12th grade when you met, at a time when all everyone cared about were getting into their respective dream universities and establishing a solid group of friends to call back once they’re already on their separate ways. He got stuck in traffic that day and wasn’t allowed entry past the school gates at first because he didn’t get his uniform on time while you and your group of friends were on time in class, completely unexpecting of a new addition to the group as you all worried about the upcoming entrance exams.

“Oh, look at that, new kid.” Minho nudged your elbow and whispered loudly close to you that day, gesturing to the spaces between the curtains of the window facing the hallway. Outside, Chan was being ushered to the faculty room at the other end of the hall by a teacher, head hung low in embarrassment that he stood out with his black hoodie and sweatpants. “And no uniform on the first day—I feel like we should adopt him!”

You didn’t pay much attention to it at first, shrugging before returning to your messy Homeroom notes. An election was to be held at the end of the week and maybe, just maybe, you were thinking about it. “A bit risky, don’t you think? Right before the exams.” You mused out loud, more to the classroom elections than to the transferee.

“Do you think we’ll get him?” Minho asked anyway despite the lack of interest in your tone, leaning on your side of the shared table with a propped up elbow. “Or will Dahyun and Bam’s class next door?”

The answer was given to Minho over five minutes later, when the gentle sound of your Homeroom adviser’s voice was interrupted by a knock on the door. “Excuse me, good morning, Ms. Park!” The faculty head, Mrs. Liu, peered in your room that day with Chan trailing behind with curious eyes. “I’m so sorry for the interruption but your transfer student is now here!”

In front of the classroom, Ms. Park welcomed Chan with a smile and clasped hands. “Ah yes, Bang Chan, finally! Come on in!”

Chan introduced himself in awkward giggles and a slight miscalculated step when he didn’t immediately see the elevated area separating the black board and the first row of desks. “Hi, I’m eighteen-year-old student Bang Chan and I moved here from Sydney, Australia! Please take care of me!” You remembered him introducing himself at Ms. Park’s request before being seated right next to Hansol on the other end of the fourth row.

Minho, who eyed the boy curiously the entire time, sat up properly after and told you, “I’m gonna ambush him at recess. You wanna come with?”

You knew even then that you didn’t have to answer the question because as the bell rang for recess time, Minho had dragged you over to Hansol and Chan’s table as soon as he saw you pick up your wallet.

“Hi, I’m Minho and this is Y/N and we’re about to kidnap you!” Minho exclaimed as the two of you approached the unexpecting boy, earning you wide eyes from him. “If you want to, of course. Y/N’s gonna be class president again by Friday and I’m gonna be fighting Moonbin to the death for basketball captain so we’re clearly overqualified to show you around.”

You remember Hansol toppling over in laughter while you turned away in embarrassment. Not that it was uncommon for the most nonsense things to come out of Minho’s mouth then—in fact, it was quite the opposite.

Fortunately, Chan was easily persuaded. “Uh...sure, why not?” He grinned with relief, pushing his chair away from his desk and picking up his own wallet before following you and Minho downstairs to the cafeteria.

You ended up helping him buy snacks from the cafeteria and showing him around what you deemed as the most important areas of the campus within the thirty-minute recess. Because of the short time, he met your other friends belatedly at lunch.

Chan came in your life quite late—both literally and figuratively—but you suppose it’s not that bad because you’ve been friends ever since.

Minho was ‘disappointed but not surprised’ when Chan tried out for the swim team instead of his basketball team—his words not yours.

Club Week was not actually a week but a week and a half, giving everyone time to either succeed or fail in the clubs they signed up for and move on to the next. Since you were elected Class President, you decided on sticking only to what you considered your most important clubs for senior year: Volleyball and the school paper. Minho, on the other hand, unfortunately lost his ‘fight to the death’ with Moonbin over the team captain title but he kept insisting that it was because he really was fated to be the cheer dance team’s captain instead.

“At least, it’s one less sweaty kid I have to worry about.” You jokingly assured Minho once Club Week was over. You and your group of friends were huddled on your usual table that lunch break, comparing training and review center schedules.

“Ya, what does that mean?”

“It means you’re in two sports clubs and you never shower after any one of them!” Dahyun points out for you across the table, earning her ‘ooh’s and high-fives from everyone. “You should be embarrassed, Mingyu’s on three teams and he literally showers on Febreze.”

“But I do shower, just not as religiously as everyone.” 

“Why not?” 

“Climate change!” 

You turned to Chan amidst the playful chaos, shaking your head in feigned disapproval. “Sorry, they’re five.”

The boy only chuckled. “It’s okay.”

“I’m glad you joined the school paper too, by the way.” You made sure to add, hinting that you saw him at your club assembly the week prior despite the large turn-out of people. “I heard from Jihyo at our last council meeting. Broadcasting, right?”

“Yep,” He nodded with pursed lips and an eye smile. “so you guys will hear me DJ for the rest of the year too.”

“Can’t wait.”

Chan’s first gig as the school radio’s DJ was the Friday that followed, in the middle of your student council meeting. He sounded nervous at first, which made you, Jihyo, and Seungkwan laugh while you were presenting your batch’s initiatives for the whole school year, but he made it out alive—and even included a shout out for you.

“Also, shoutout to Y/N! Thank you for showing me the ropes this month.” His voice echoed faintly through the hallways at lunch break. A pause then followed, what you assumed was Changbin and Jisung scolding him, before he snickered and said, “I guess Minho and Hansol, too! See you tomorrow, you guys!”

Ever since the 7th grade, you’ve made sure to follow each and every one of your closest friends’ extracurricular activies. From Dahyun’s and Jihyo’s recitals to Bam Bam’s and Minho’s competitions and meets, you were always there: half as a volunteer for the school paper and the other half as a cheering friend. It’s your way of looking out for your friends, by standing in the sidelines for support. 

So naturally, with the addition of Chan to your friend group, you always came to his swim meets with a camera, a write-up outline, and a tarpaulin you’re quite sure Minho and Bam Bam didn’t make while sober the night before.

“Like the slogan, dolphin boy?” Bam Bam snickered at Chan as he sat on his designated waiting area right in front of your bleacher. It was the final tournament for the semester and your two other friends have decided on a lazy ‘Let’s go Dolphin Boy!’ decorated in glitters and a Photoshopped photo of Chan’s head in a dolphin. “When are you going on?”

Chan turned to your group and immediately slapped a hand to his face in embarrassment. “Oh my God...”

“To set the record straight, Jihyo and I were studying together last night and Dahyun was at piano lessons.” You held your hands up in self-defense to an eyeroll from Minho. “The poster’s all on Bam and Minho.”

“I know.” Chan mumbled behind his hand, removing it slowly after. “I’m on in five minutes. And what happens when I do get a place on the stands?”

“Then we’ll stand up and wave this harder!” Minho answered this time, aggressively waving the cartolina and causing a few glitters to scatter on your jeans.

“Minho!”

Chan competed in 1500 m I.M. and all the butterfly relays on that day and only then did you notice that he liked competing in them more than the other categories. You took photos and noted the important details with Bam Bam’s agile typing on your phone throughout the event, up until Chan received his mostly gold medals—when Bam Bam and Minho did kept to their word and ambushed the poor boy by throwing the slogan over his head when he asked for a group photo with everyone.

“This is like the Avengers of extended friend groups!” Dahyun joked once the chaos has died down and you’ve managed to get everyone to prepare for a couple of group photos. “Now I’m even more excited for dinner!”

A couple of Chan’s childhood friends also came that day—Younghyun, Somi, Sana, Lisa, and Matthew whom you befriended after over dinner that was Chan’s treat. It looked more like a weird family reunion to you than what Dahyun thought but you laughed anyway as you adjusted your camera settings.

“Okay, you guys ready?” You asked the group once everyone’s settled down, arms slung over each other and bright smiles ready to be taken for Instagram updates. “One, two—“

At the center of the photo, with a big bouquet of roses and several medals, Chan suddenly shifted in his position under Matthew’s and Younghyun’s arms and asked you, “Wait, wait, wait...Y/N aren’t you joining?”

You shook your head, making everyone erupt in protest. “Ya, then who’s gonna take the photo?”

Minho doesn’t exaggerate it one bit whenever he recalls this that Chan literally bolted out of the group to pull in his nearest teammate to take the photo, quickly tugging you to him afterwards and positioning you right in front of him once the group photos were taken. You ended up with his arms and his bouquet draped over you in all of the photos.

With the college entrance exams fast approaching over a month later, you found yourself juggling your academics, cram school, Volleyball training, student council, and the school paper all at once. It was manageable at times, with the help of your teammates and clubmates, but of course there would be days when you would almost fall asleep on the spot at Saturday cram school, in particular.

Chan was no better as he balanced academics and cram school with his own swim training, the school radio, and preparing a portfolio for his talent exams at the Departments of Music for every university he applied to.

Fortunately, you both went to the same cram school with everyone else. Seated next to each other, you bought Chan coffee while he passed you candies and chocolate he would get from his mom through the mail.

“You, uh...” Chan nudged your knuckles with his softly one time, alternating his gaze between your open notes and the formulas being discussed on the white board two rows ahead. “The answer’s 2.”

“Hm?” You hummed tiredly, free hand supporting your cheek as you tried so hard to pay attention and follow along. The day prior was meetings upon meetings that lasted until 8:30 PM, pushing all of your time allotted for homework to midnight since you had to take the bus home. To say you were so tempted to fall asleep then was an understatement.

Knowing this, you saw Chan take the liberty of writing the correct answer on your notes through your half-lidded eyes, poking your knuckles with the end of his mechanical pencil after. “You have the whole solution down but the final answer is 2, silly.” He chuckled softly, discreetly passing you another gummy bear from under the table. “Do you even know what you’ve been writing?”

You nodded even though your brain was barely processing anything, receiving the gummy bear after. “I think so?” You mused out loud, making him laugh. 

“We’ll just have to go through this again later. You should’ve stayed at home and rested if you’re so tired.”

You found out later, when you were much awake to have lunch at a nearby cafe with Chan, that the boy took down the notes for you in a fashion similar to your note-taking technique for you to copy—and that he drew a small dinosaur on the margins of your notebook with a text bubble that said, “You can do it!”

Chan has made it a habit to bring you an extra thermos of coffee and drew little animals on your notebook whenever the two of you were bored ever since.

You showed up at Chan’s doorstep on his first Christmas Day in Korea, not really expecting to see his mom with his aunt on the other side of the door.

“Hi.” Chan mustered up a rather confused smile, growing even bigger and less shy right in front of you the longer he gazed at your own wide eyes and long travel coat. “Y/N, hi.”

“I thought you were—“ You unconsciously gestured to his extended family running around the hallways behind him, furrowing your brows. “Hi, um, should I just—should I just go?”

Chan furrowed his brows, instinctively pulling you closer to the doorway by your arm once he noticed the snow falling harder behind you. “What? Why?” He asked at the sudden proximity. “What’s up?”

His unintentionally blunt tone with the question definitely had you caught off-guard and flustered. “O-Oh, I just thought—I thought you wouldn’t be with your parents and siblings for Christmas so I came over.” You cringed internally at your truthful but rather cheesy answer. “Everyone’s skating at the mall today and I thought of inviting you because I assumed that you’d be lonely here with just your uncle and auntie...”

Another smile, an amused one, settled on his lips as you talked. “Really?” He mused out loud to which you nodded absentmindedly at. “We could go right now, if you want. My mom would probably tell me to bring Hannah and Lucas along, though, if that’s okay.”

Your eyes widened for the second time that afternoon. “W-We can, yeah.” You nodded slowly to both questions, breaking into your own smile.

“Okay, come on in first, then, it’s cold out.” Chan then took you by the same hand inside, closing the door behind him and leading you to the shoe rack for your boots. “My mom’s been looking for you and everyone else since they landed here too! You should be able to stop her from fussing over dinner so much.”

You met Chan’s parents and siblings that day, almost getting stuck in his aunt and uncle’s house because of his mom’s excitement at meeting one of her son’s friends in Korea until Chan smoothly brought up your offer of going to the skating rink with his siblings. You eventually left the house with him and his younger siblings right before Minho could text you that you were taking too long.

“You do know how to skate, right, Chan?” Minho asked when you arrived. He sat between you and the boy in question to rest his feet from racing with Dahyun, removing his skates and stretching his legs forward. “Y/N and Jihyo suck at explaining things she’s already good at and Bam Bam’s a deer walking for the first time so the choices for teacher aren’t really looking so well for you right now.”

When you looked over at him from Minho’s shoulder, he simply shrugged. “Shouldn’t be that hard. It’s just ice and blades, right?”

But it ended up being very much so, at least for him as he ended up reaching for yours and Jihyo’s hands before you could even run off to join Minho and Dahyun on their race. “Okay, okay, I was wrong!” He exclaimed dramatically, gloved hand meeting your own when Jihyo jokingly moved her hand away. “I’m going to fall over!”

“You’re doing fine.” You rolled your eyes in feigned exasperation, holding his hand anyway as you slowed your pace. His siblings then passed by the two of you, giggling over their eldest brother tripping on ice. "Look, even your siblings are doing fine and you came from the same place as those two.” 

“Chan, you’re being dramatic.” Jihyo added to tease him further, gracefully sliding away from the two of you. “‘It’s just ice and blades, right?’ You’ll get used to it!” 

Then, as if for unintentional emphasis, Chan almost tripped at this and instinctively held your hand tighter. “I really am going to fall if I let go.” He pouted, linking your arms together instead. “Can’t you really teach me?”

You unlink your arms, catching his hand again. “Fine, I’ll try but don’t cling to me too much.” You pointed out, laughing when he interlocks your fingers together. “You swim in deep ass Olympic pools back and forth like it’s nothing, ice shouldn’t be that scary to you, you know.” 

With that, you spent the rest of the afternoon teaching Chan how to balance himself on his skates (and getting him out of Minho and Dahyun’s way as the two circled the rink like two roller derby players). He perfected his balance at the end of the day but he still wouldn’t let go of your hand so naturally, you came back next year. 

And next year eventually turned into an annual tradition between the two of you. 

The exam results then came in the middle of your final Volleyball game which was probably not good for your adrenaline levels but everyone found it amusing.

Your team was leading in the final set, 23-22, and you could tell as you delivered volley after volley that your opponent was already losing hope. On the sidelines of the open gymnasium, Bam Bam and Minho held up the ugliest orange cartolina ever with ‘HAIKYUU THAT SHIT Y/N!’ in mismatched marker colors while Jihyo, Dahyun, Chan, Hansol, and Seungkwan screamed their lungs out for your team.

You’re quite certain the cartolina got confiscated by your coach after for inappropriate language, you’re not quite sure even at present because you never saw it again, especially when it was dropped to the ground the moment everyone’s phones started ringing because of an e-mail from school.

You noticed it from the sidelines, even as you and another teammate delivered the final volley that lead to your victory. Chan held your phone with a bright smile on his face, directing it to you after as you and your team huddled for a group hug and greeted the opposite team for the last time.

“Congratulations!” He greeted you as soon as you’ve celebrated enough with your teammates, waving your phone in front of you as he approached with everyone jumping not far behind him. “On both!”

“Both what?”

Before Chan could even answer you properly, you were engulfed in a big hug by Jihyo, Seungkwan, and Dahyun. “You did it!” They exclaimed in unison. “You passed all of the uni’s you applied to! We all did!”

Immediately, your widened eyes and agape mouth sought Chan for confirmation, to which he simply nodded with a laugh and a thumbs up. “No way...” You muttered in disbelief, gaining feeling back in your frozen legs after to jump along with everyone in your group hug. “No shit, no way! Congratulations, guys!”

“Congrats to you too, dude! You won twice today!” Jihyo pointed out, making everyone laugh. “We’re still on for BBQ, right?”

“Well, I can’t be the only one paying now since we all passed the exam!”

You got hugs from the others as well (and an extra one with a high-five from Seungkwan because he was just so hyped about your volleyball game), receiving from Chan last since he wanted a photo with you after.

“We could do a group photo, you know.” You tried suggesting as you held your Finals tournament trophy in between the two of you. Hansol has both of your phones side by side in front of him, adjusting the settings a little before taking the photo.

“We could but that’s for later. I need a new contact photo for you!” Chan insisted. Before you could comment on his ridiculous excuse, however, Hansol was already taking photos of the two of you.

Chan did set a photo of you from that day as your contact photo—specifically the one where you were pretending to dump invisible water from the trophy over him. It’s ridiculous and it still makes everyone laugh whenever Chan’s phone lights up with this photo.

Graduation celebrations naturally came after, as soon as Spring Break was over. Bam Bam threw a house party for your batch that was anything but sober and civil, the clubs each had send-off parties, and the student council planned a Graduation Ball which was mostly just yours, Jihyo’s, and Seungkwan’s excuse to dress semi-fancy and have Chan invite Younghyun to invite his band, Day6, to perform a whole set of their new songs.

You came with your friend group, or at least you and Jihyo convinced yourselves that you did since no one bothered to look for dates. It had been your finals before the Saturday of the graduation ball and, on top of that, the two of you were busy ‘student council-ing’ as Minho worded it, organizing the event with the school faculty and a few parents.

You did dance with everyone by the end of the night too, Minho pulling you along by the hand in a group hug as you yelled out the lyrics to Days Gone By—one of the last songs of the evening. “Finally you can join us!” He exclaimed dramatically, pressing a kiss on top of your head as he slung an arm over your shoulder. He didn’t actually need to worry about spending time with you since you’re all staying in the hotel for the night anyway. “Loosen up, will you?!”

On your other side, you could only hear Chan laugh as Bam Bam proceeded into the center of your big circle to dance, challenging an unexpecting Yugyeom nearby after. He stole glances over to you occasionally, a fond smile on his lips whenever you’d catch him in the act. He actually wanted to ask you to dance but decided against it last minute, growing too shy at noticing that the crowds are mostly dancing in friend groups rather than pairs until it was ultimately time to retreat into your hotel rooms.

“Goodnight and happy graduation, Seoul High!”

Fortunately, however, Chan made up for this by waiting on you after the dance. You stayed behind with Jihyo and Seungkwan for an hour more once the students have either gone back to their hotel rooms or migrated to the hotel lobby to wait for their rides home; Chan was more than happy to lend an extra helping hand as you thanked the staff and made sure that the packing up was done orderly.

“You did well tonight,” He complimented you sheepishly as the two of you carefully packed up the stage’s sound equipment. The microphone he was trying to remove from the stands was still on then, making his voice echo faintly through the hall. “organizing the event and all.”

Your face heated up against the now softer stage lights as you moved the guitar and music stands from the center to the side where a staff member was waiting for you. “T-Thanks, Chan. Did you have fun?”

He simply nodded this time with a sheepish giggle, passing you the microphones after making sure they were properly turned off.

After this, Chan politely walked you and Jihyo back to your shared room with Dahyun just two floors above the one all the boys in your class reserved for themselves

“Night, Chan! Make sure you’re not being too loud with the boys downstairs, okay?” Jihyo bid him goodbye quickly with a small yawn and a mischievous smile as she opened the heavy door to your room with ease. “I’m pretty sure Bam brought that wireless microphone with him again—and it’s probably Mingyu or Seokmin’s idea again.”

“Don’t worry we won’t, I’ll make sure.” Chan nodded sheepishly before waving goodbye to her. Once she’s inside, he then turned to you and said, “Goodnight, Y/N.”

You nodded slowly at him, a little hesitant. When he raised his eyebrows at this, you then suggested, “Um...I know this is sudden and it’s like 1 AM but you don’t happen to be in the mood for McDonald’s, right?”

“Seriously? At this time?” 

“I’ll buy you an iced coffee if you want.” 

So you ended up at the McDonald’s two blocks from the hotel where your graduation ball was held, wrinkled dress suits and all. You talked for what seemed like an hour more, played with the Powerpuff Girls happy meal toy he bought on a whim, and got scolded through calls and text from your friends because you didn’t invite them. Since this day, the two of you have been buying each other’s coffee from McDonald’s.

Bam Bam and Minho both moved further West in the city, the latter sharing his uncle’s old apartment with another friend of his, while Jihyo dorms with Mina, another friend of yours from another school, up North. Besides these, no one made a drastic change to move houses or dormitories from the area your parents considered near since everyone else attended universities relatively near. At university, especially on your first year, you, Chan, and Dahyun mostly stuck with each other; just now with the addition of Lisa who ended up attending the same university and Jacob whom Chan befriended in his classes.

Sometime towards the end of your first semester, when Bam Bam and Minho skipped school to crash one of your semi-finals Volleyball game, your now larger group of friends decided that Chan would ‘take one for the team’ and get a driver’s license for all of your travelling needs. He lost against Jacob and Dahyun of all people in the most intense game of rock-paper-scissors you’ve ever seen. 

Because of this, for the two weeks leading up to finals week, you ended up risking your life accompanying Chan to practice in his aunt’s old SUV. During this time period, he either took you to and from university as well or from your neighborhood to the bar and grill you started frequenting with him and the rest of your friend group. It’s not that he’s bad at driving, his parking skills were just initially a cause of worry for you whenever he was driving in crowded places. 

“Am I close?” Chan asked you on your first day of finals, leaning over your side of the car to check the side mirror. You had your reviewers for your Communications class glued to your face throughout the entire twenty-minute ride but that didn’t stop you from simultaneously being anxious of hitting someone else’s car right in front of your college building. “Can you check?” 

You opened the window and briefly peeked your head out, turning to Chan after and almost jumping at how close he’s gotten. “It doesn’t even look like you tried.” You laughed through your immediate flustered expression, making him lean back in frustration as he prepares to move the car again. “How long have we been here? Sorry, I wasn’t paying attention.” 

Chan pouted, keeping a hand on your head rest as he now carefully re-attempts to parallel park. “Just five minutes.” He mumbles, alternating his gaze quickly between the front and back of the car. “So that means you’ve been studying well this entire time.” 

“Your driving is already good I could even sleep in, it’s just the parking that’s worrying.” You pointed out teasingly, leaning on his hand to glance back at the situation behind you and poking on his new arm bands. “Speaking of, you do know that you don’t even have to park, right? It’s not like you’re going to wait for me.” 

“But I’ll wait for you.” Your eyes met belatedly as Chan finally parks the car. “It’s just 30 minutes, right?” 

“It’s two hours, Chan...” You quirked a brow. “Didn’t I text you that?”  

“Really? Ah, well...I’ll just...” Chan chuckled sheepishly, clearly realizing his mistake at the last minute. “I can totally just hang around, I guess.” 

But the problem was, Dahyun didn’t have class that day, Lisa was organizing a club party, and Jacob was in his own volleyball training. Chan ended up loitering around the swim team for a while and impulsively buying you lunch because he didn’t want to waste gas. 

You bought him lunch when he passed his driver’s license in return. 

“You probably need glasses now.” You pointed out to him as you happily ate your Burger King inside his car. The nearest branch to the driving school he attended had a relatively big parking lot, making the two of you sigh in relief that he didn’t have to parallel park this time. “I’m pretty sure I texted you that my exam was from 10 to 12.” 

Next to you, Chan had his seat reclined and the windows fully open as he sipped on his Cola and munched on fries. “No, I checked it again the other day and you texted 10 to 11.” 

“What?!” When you do check your phones, only then do you find out that you did mistakenly text him 10 to 11 instead of 10 to 12. “Oh my God, I’m so sorry! Should I buy you another burger?”

Chan simply shook his head and snatched the ice cream cup you’ve been saving. “I’ll just take this, thank you!” 

“Ya!” 

The first time the driver’s license actually came in handy was on your first volleyball game as a university student. Chan went on a round trip around the major universities in Seoul to pick up all of your friends which almost caused you to be late to the game but you could barely care then—you were too pumped over the idea of all of your friends coming together to watch you.

Besides, Chan volunteered to be a courtside reporter for the game so you weren’t scolded by your coach alone.

“Good luck out there!” Chan nudged your side with a wink as the two of you prepared to enter the arena with your team. He made sure that he had his microphone off twice this time. “I’d really love to interview you when you win.”

“When have I ever lost in front of you, hm?” You teased with a grin of your own, just as the backstage doors opened to the cheers and drums of your university. 

And, true to your word, you win the game a little over an hour and a half later. With a small trophy passed around from your teammates and the promise of a day-off from your coach, Chan was the first of your friends to approach you.

“And here we also have SNU women’s volleyball team newest recruits, Y/N and Chaeyeon!” Chan introduced you and your teammate in front of the cameras. In the distance, you could see your friends then: Jihyo, Dahyun, Mina, and Lisa holding balloons in the color of your university, Bam Bam and Minho holding their usual embarrassing slogan, and Jacob jumping up and down excitedly over your game’s turn-out. “This is your first game and first win of the season, congrats! How does it feel, you two?”

Your eyes met Chaeyeon’s instinctively to your right, making the two of you giggle shyly. After a mini game of passing the microphones between each other, you eventually ended up answering, “Um, we’re very grateful that our first game gave us our first win as new members as well and we hope that we’ll continue doing even better in the semi-finals!”

“Yes! Everyone’s hoping so too, especially after watching your play today!” Chan commented, clearly going off-topic then by the way you noticed how his mini crew of fellow students looked surprise and even checked their own cue cards.

Once the interviews were over, you were then whisked away by Minho and Jacob—the former to catch up with you while the latter was so excited talking to you about your game.

“Dude you were so good out there! Like that serve on the first set that really riled up the opposing team’s captain? And and that over the net move you did with Chaeyeon! We should have a practice game sometime!” Jacob always talked a million times per second over things that excited him but you didn’t mind, at least now Minho had someone to compete with over who could say the weirder thing.

The interaction placed a rather childish pout on Chan throughout the ride to your promised Korean BBQ dinner, no one but Lisa paid it too much mind.

“Stop pouting you look ugly.” She said to the poor boy with a feigned judgmental face, switching seats with you earlier for the ride to dinner so you can discuss volleyball with Jihyo and Jacob. “Why are you even pouting? Something on your mind?”

“Nothing.” Chan only furrowed his brows and frowned, glancing over to you on the rear view mirror to see you laughing along to a video Minho was showing everyone on his phone.

it’s not Minho that bothered him, everyone with eyes and a braincell have always known that he’s in love with his current roommate.

Jacob, though...you play the same sport and are both equally passionate over it! It definitely made Chan think.

“Nothing looks like she’s having fun, huh?” Lisa mumbled under her breath in response after a moment, breaking out into a laugh when Chan finally glances over at her with a confused look. “Nothing!”

Lisa made sure you sat next to Chan after, dragging Minho and Jacob by the ears to the other side of the table.

On your second year, your favorite junior from your previous school finally entered college. Seungmin was also on the student council, school paper, as well as in the high school baseball team who often practiced with your volleyball team so you basically considered him your ‘child,’ much to his annoyance. Though he attended a university that was nearer to Bam Bam’s and Minho’s, you pestered Chan into driving you almost once a month to his dorm to visit, anyway. 

Chan would’ve said no every time given his own busy schedule but you promised him every time that Felix, a friend of Seungmin’s who happened to come from Australia as well, and Jeongin, another junior you unofficially ‘adopted’ in high school, would also be there. 

“Chan, I need to go to Seungmin’s, it’s an emergency.” You greeted Chan one day right after your afternoon classes. You found him in the library, studying for second semester midterms with Lisa and Jacob which did made you feel bad but you really couldn’t wait for the next bus anymore.

“What kind of emergency?” Lisa asked, prompting you to shake your head. 

“The kids said it’s very bad...” You continued shaking your head frantically and that was enough for Chan to pack up his things and lead you outside to his car. 

When the two of you arrived at Seungmin and Jeongin’s shared dorm, Chan was more than confused at seeing the former sprawled out on the common area carpet with his arms folded over his chest like a vampire while the latter and Jeongin hovered over him with worried looks and mini fans. 

“Is Seungmin dying?” Chan asked you with genuine worry as you approached, which would’ve made you laugh with the choice of words had you not just been vaguely called on short notice to deal with the situation. 

You didn’t get to answer him at first as your first instinct was to sit down next to Seungmin and ask Felix, “We came here as fast as we could. What’s wrong?” 

In front of you, Seungmin groaned in pain and rolled over on his stomach, hiding his reddening cheeks from you. “Y/N, why are you here?” He whined, bringing his arms up to his head to hide his face further. “Did these two call you?”

“Yeah they did.” You answered firmly, rolling the boy on his back again that prompted more complaints from him. “Now, what’s wrong? School? Sports? Friends? Are you okay?”

It took a moment for Seungmin to remove his arms over his face and answer you and it undeniably made you and Chan nervous. When he did answered, it was what you least expected from him as he said, “Y/N, I think I have a crush...” 

A pause then followed as everyone simply stared back at Seungmin who immediately hid in his hoodie once again. 

“Oh for the love of God, Kim Seungmin! Are you kidding me right now?! I came all the way here for this?” You smacked him in the arm once you’ve recovered, finally breaking out into laughs as the other boys toppled over in laughter. Turning to Jeongin and Felix, you then asked, “So why did you call me? You could’ve called Minho, he literally lives three blocks away.” 

Felix and Jeongin glanced over at each other and shrugged. “He said he’s having love problems,” Jeongin pointed to Seungmin innocently before turning to you. “So I thought of calling you. Aren’t you and Chan a thing?” 

This time, it was you and Chan looking at each other and laughing. “No, no, we’re not a thing.” He clarified for you with a dismissive wave. “Y/N’s married in a poly relationship with academics and extracurriculars.”

“And Chan’s secretly a merman so it’s a hard pass.” You finished his thought jokingly, looking over at Seungmin after. 

“You guys, I’m still in a situation here!” Seungmin frowned, lifting his head up to place on your lap. “I’m fucked, basically.”

“Well, since we came all the way here and gas is expensive, do you want to talk about it? Lix and I can cook dinner.”  

With that (and a few more words to get Seungmin off of the floor), you managed to drag the lovestruck boy into the kitchen and cooked him tonkatsu with Felix and Jeongin on your tail. Chan kept him company the entire time, peering over his shoulder as he narrated the story of a certain figure skater he met at his Freshman welcome assembly. “We’ve been friends for a while and I really like them but they’re always getting into trouble!” Seungmin mostly rambled, making you, Jeongin, and Felix snicker with your backs turned.

“All the more reasons to see them often, then?” You suggested, much to Seungmin’s annoyance.

“Won’t I be too obvious? Or too doting? Maybe they don’t like that as much since they’re so independent. Agh, what do I do?!”

“Play it cool like you always do, kid.” You answered simply, patting his head affectionately as you passed by his spot to retrieve a basket of condiments “What do you think, Chan?”

You clearly caught him off-guard then by the way his eyes slowly widened and he instinctively sat up straight. “O-Oh, u-um—yeah, what you said...” He eventually agreed with a nonchalant shrug to cover up his shaky actions. “Don’t overthink it or else nothing happens.”

You re-joined Jeongin and Felix across the kitchenette with a chuckle, nudging Jeongin with your elbow after. “You kids are growing up! Ah, but it still kinda feels like yesterday when you two were just messing around back in high school.”

“We’re a year below you, what are you talking about?” Jeongin pouted, eyes not leaving the side dishes he was preparing. When you don’t tease him further about it with another side comment, he then adds, “Sorry for assuming you and Chan were dating by the way. That wasn’t weird, right?”

You shook your head reassuringly. “No, it’s cool! I’m just curious where you’d get that from.”

“Minho said—“ And that was enough for you to give your aforementioned friend an earful the next time you saw him after.

“So, Chan’s not dating?” Felix asked next to which you nodded at. “Oh, cool!”

“Why? Do you have someone for him?”

Though Felix didn’t say anything more specific after that, Chan was then coerced into a friendly blind date to the movies a week after, you heard it at his new sideline podcast with Changbin and Jisung of all places.

“I—“ Seungmin’s first reaction was to clasp his hands together while the two of you were listening to the podcast episode in YouTube. “I spill out my heart to you guys and over tonkatsu then I find out that this happened right under my nose that night?”

It was a month since his dramatic confession and a little over two weeks since Chan went on the blind date and you’ve been taking the bus with Dahyun to visit the kids ever since. Chan thought he did something wrong but you’ve assured him multiple times that you’re just trying to be considerate of him since he now has an additional person on his plate.

Dahyun also wanted to visit Jihyo and Mina so you decided on commuting with her in particular.

“Ah, well, that’s life—or college...or maybe both.” You shrugged. You often studied in their dorm living room to pass the time if Minho wasn’t up for being bothered with in his apartment—you found out throughout this that studying with a Legal Management major like Seungmin motivates you to go through your rigorous readings. “How’s your crush by the way? Any progress?”

“They want to try speed skating! Do you know how dangerous that is? Not to mention, the legality of it all...”

“This person seems like they get you up on your toes. I like it! Makes things a bit more exciting, don’t you think?”

“It just makes my head hurt.” Seungmin sighed, rubbing his temples dramatically for emphasis. “I can’t help but worry...”

“I think you’re sweet looking out for them like this.” You assured. “But it’s not sports if you don’t get hurt and we both know that.” 

“Then what do I do?” 

“Just look out for them. I’m pretty sure they’re not all that clumsy as you make them out to be—you said they’re an athlete, right?—but it’s still important to be there for support and help when they really need it.” You half-shrugged, not really knowing what else to say. “But not just as someone who has a crush. Be a friend first and foremost—I mean, obviously, since you’re not dating, you’re just friends, hopefully for now. Yeah, that’s it! Don’t overthink it, you’re friends not married!” 

A thought then seemed to pass Seungmin as a small smile formed on his lips. He then pulled his knees close to his chest and leaned back on the sofa behind him. “So, is that how you are with Chan?” 

“What?!” 

“I mean he’s sort of dating right now but don’t you have a crush on him?” The younger boy asked in genuine curiosity. “Honestly, I was surprised that you let him go on that blind date with the Soyeon girl Felix recommended, much less a second date this weekend.” 

“No—I mean no, I don’t have a crush on him.” You refused calmly though your voice clearly shook a little but not for the reason Seungmin thought it was. “We’re just friends. You’re going off-topic!” 

Seungmin’s eyes lit up in interest. “Well, I thought about it so we’re talking about it now! Have you seriously never thought about it?”

“No, but I am now because you brought it up!” You shook your head back truthfully before smacking his arm with your reviewers, making him pout and wince at you. “Don’t do that! You’re like—you’re trying to brainwash me into having feelings or something!”

Seungmin instinctively held his hands up, filled with his own lecture notes, and shook his head at the accusation. “No I’m not!” He pouted at you to no avail. “I’m just saying that I’ve always thought there was something, with how you two are so close.”

“You and I are close, Minho and I are close,” You argued back with a small pout, crossing your arms. “Heck, Bam Bam and I are close and we grew up together since the 4th grade.” 

Again, the boy shook his head stubbornly. “Yeah, we’re all different kinds of close, especially Chan,” He claimed with so much conviction. “You look out for me, Minho, and Bam Bam but Chan looks out for you as much as you do for him, if that makes sense.”   

“See you can’t even reason out properly and you’re in Legal Management.” You scoffed playfully. “I look out for everyone the same way, Chan’s not that kind of special for me. Also, it’s basic human decency, Seungmin. I can’t believe you don’t look out for me back, to be honest.”

Though you came off as perfectly unbothered by this, there was a period when things started became awkward on your end and it frustrated you until the end of your second year. 

Seungmin teased you to no end for it to make up for your equally endless questions about the person he’s taken interest in, Minho kept bringing it up whenever the two of you met or hung out in his apartment, and Dahyun only confronted you about it when it started becoming inconvenient for her as yours and Chan’s mutual friend.

“Chan keeps texting me if we want a ride to Minho’s but I already told him that we’re on the bus right now.” Dahyun showed you her phone on another one of your many commutes to Minho’s side of the city. By this time, it has been two months and three dates for Chan, with your time spend with said boy having reduced significantly. “Are you guys okay? Have you been talking lately?” 

You furrowed your brows and nodded in genuine confusion. “Yeah, why?” 

“It feels like he wants to ask me about you but he won’t say it directly.” Dahyun shrugged, leaning back on the seats. “It kinda gives me the impression that you guys fought or something.” 

“We didn’t fight.” You assured with a small frown. “Nothing happened, really.”  

“Then what is it?” 

It took you a moment to answer as your mind instinctively went to the conversation you previously had with Seungmin. “I...you know when someone points something out to you in a different light and then it makes you think of a lot of things?” When you saw Dahyun nod slowly, you then took it as your cue to admit, “It’s something like that, I guess.”

And like you, it also took a moment for Dahyun to answer. “Well, how do you feel about it?” She asked back as a response. “I think I know what this is about but you don’t have to tell me if you’re uneasy telling me about it.”

And you were uneasy and confused, very much so. “I don’t think I’m feeling anything special about it, really.” You admitted in a smaller voice, finding your attention flitting down to your hands on your lap. “I feel like I’m just thinking too much on what that someone said and how they said it.” 

“Then it’s probably nothing, easy as that. Don’t let people’s words get into your head too much, especially on things like this—if we are thinking of the same thing—or else it’s gonna feel like you’re being forced into having different feelings or think differently.” Dahyun shrugged with a reassuring smile. “If otherwise, even then don’t overthink it too much. Just let things happen as they are.” 

When you didn’t respond immediately, she then took your silence to quickly add, “Anyway, bottom line is, whatever it really is that you’re feeling or thinking, don’t ignore Chan for it. Talk to him about it specifically if it helps just don’t make him feel left out just because you’re on a one-sided awkward situation.”  

It was a tough love kind of advice but Dahyun pestered you about it until she saw you approach Chan first over a week later, when you personally asked him to carpool to Bam Bam’s place for a year-end party.

You’ve never seen Chan’s face light up as much as it did on that day at the campus library. 

“R-Really?” He stuttered out in disbelief and suddenly, all hints of drowsiness had disappeared on his expression. “I mean, c-cool! Uh, what time should I pick you and Dahyun up?” 

“Ah, well, what time should you pick up Soyeon if she’s going to carpool with us?” You asked slowly, rubbing your nape awkwardly as you stood next to his table. 

His eyes widened in surprise before an equally awkward chuckle came out of his lips. “Soyeon’s not carpooling with us.” 

“Hm?” 

“She’s going with her own friends since they’re nearer to her place.” Chan nodded absentmindedly, pulling a chair for you to sit down. You took the place without hesitation, neck heating up in embarrassment over the thought that you seemed too eager. “We’re not actually dating anymore.” 

“Oh?” You furrowed your brows as quickly as your expression almost lit up. “I mean, since when, if it’s okay to ask?” 

“Since last week. I don’t know, we agreed that it’s really...not happening between us.” Chan shrugged nonchalantly, going back to his lecture notes. “It’s cool, though, we’re studying together next week at the new study hall near Itaewon.” 

You nodded, exhaling a breath you didn’t even realize you were holding until then. “At least it’s not awkward or anything.” 

“What about us?” 

You immediately looked up at this, meeting Chan’s somewhat hopeful gaze that had you unexpectedly stammering, “W-what do you mean?” 

“Did I do something wrong?” He pursed his lips nervously, voice growing smaller with each other. “It’s just that we haven’t talked a lot lately—or maybe I’m just overthinking it...” 

You were quick to shake your head, mustering up a small smile. “No, you didn’t do anything.” You assured him gently. “I’ve just been—it’s nothing.” 

“Really?” 

You nodded, breathing in another sigh of relief. “Yeah, I just had a lot of things going on then. It’s okay now.” 

And it really was okay then. Talking to Chan again assured you at the time that you liked him as a friend. You really really liked him at the time as a friend. 

Third year meant preparing for your senior year and going on your Junior Year internship which is probably why Bam Bam scheduled a trip to his hometown in Bangkok in the summer before this. It was just him, you, Chan, Dahyun, Jihyo, and Minho as a kind of mini high school reunion—the small kind of gathering everyone naturally hopes for with the pacing of university life. 

You stayed at his family’s house where his parents offered you the entire expanse of the living room to have a movie night and sleepover in on your first night, right before the overwhelming itinerary Bam Bam planned for the next five days. 

“Rock-paper-scissors for the beds!” Bam Bam announced after your sixth movie of the night. The Meg really wasn’t that amazing in your collective opinion but that didn’t stop you from putting it at the bottom of your To-Watch list just to throw as much nonsensical comments as you can on it. “The expandable couch goes to first, second, and third; the smaller one goes to fourth, and fifth and sixth get the air bag!” 

Unsurprisingly, you and Chan had to share the grey air bag because you simply were just unlucky that night (you accidentally got a Pringles bag that had more air on it than chips prior) and Chan was so sleepy right next to Minho from cramming a passion project with Changbin and Jisung on call. Not that you minded, you were actually glad you didn’t have to put up with Bam Bam kicking you in his sleep or Minho waking you up with his cuss-filled sleep talking. 

“Are you okay with this, sharing an air bed, I mean.” Chan had asked you as you prepared to sleep some time at 3 AM. He was hunched over on the side of the mattress that wasn’t pushed to the wall, laptop perched on top of his area as he continued fighting sleep and finishing his project. Everyone else had gone to sleep earlier. “I can totally just ask Bam for a sleeping bag if you want me to.” 

“It’s okay.” You assured him as you spread the blanket over the entire expanse of the small air bed before sliding in and taking your phone out from under your pillow. “Aren’t you slidi—tucking in too, though?” 

His face lit up in genuine surprise, slowly shifting into appreciation and fondness right in front of you as he caught the concern in your own face despite the phone blocking his view. “In a bit...I’m just making a few adjustments with this.” 

Changbin and Jisung erupted into yells on the three-way video call, their voices bursting so suddenly on Chan’s headphones that he immediately muted them before you could ask or even notice. 

Fortunately, you didn’t. “Oh, then don’t stay up too late, Chan.” You pointed out in even more concern. You knew how he could get whenever he pulled all-nighters, you realized. “We have to start really early tomorrow—or later.” 

He hummed absentmindedly with a small nod as he continued nodding, glancing back up at you again after a moment. “Then you should go to sleep already, you don’t have to wait up for me.” 

“Who said I’m waiting up for you? I’m scrolling through my Instagram.” But despite your teasing tone, you still ended up scrolling through your phone until he finished his project, bidding Changbin and Jisung a quick good morning before ending the call and sliding in under his share of the covers. 

“Okay now go to sleep.” He chuckled tiredly as he gazed down on you, hand accidentally brushing against your own in the small gap between the two of you as he placed it right next to his head. 

“But you’re watching me,” You frowned disapprovingly. “turn around or something.”

“I sleep better like this and what if I closed my eyes and you took pictures even with my back turned?” He feigned a pout, bringing his hand under the pillow as he shifted more comfortably in place. “You sleep first.” 

“You’re so childish.” You giggled, shaking your head stubbornly. “I won’t do that.” 

“As if you aren’t too right now. You’re probably thinking about it.” 

“On three, then? One—” 

“Two—“ 

“Three.” With your cue, the two of you then closed your eyes at the same time, only to peek one each right after. “Ya!” 

You eventually managed to fall asleep at the same time half an hour later with Chan reluctantly turning around for you once you had your eyes closed. He’d only see your sleeping expression a little bit later, when he woke up to use the bathroom at 7 AM and came back to check up on you sleeping comfortably and move more of the blanket to your shoulders. 

“Look at these eyebags, you could carry souvenirs in them later.” Minho chuckled next to you on the ride to your first trip destination after, laughing even more when you swatted his index finger that moved up in an attempt to poke your eyes. “Nightmare? The Meg wasn’t even about ghosts, Y/N.” 

“No, I just slept late.” You sighed, leaning back on your seat. “Chan and I stayed up a little longer.” 

At this, Minho’s eyes visibly lit up and he wiggled his eyebrows mischievously at you, prompting a disgusted look on your face. “Ooh, did something spicy finally happen between you two?” 

“No—and please never do that again, it’s disgusting!” 

“It’s my eyebrows!” 

Minho ended up teasing you throughout the whole trip, anyway, as you and Chan repeated almost the exact same routine every night.     

You had your Junior Year Internship at a media network across the city and though Chan insisted multiple times that he can drive you to work before going to his own at an entertainment company in the opposite direction, you managed to convince him that you really can commute this time and spend the night at Minho’s if you went overtime. No hard feelings this time. 

So with what his presence in your life suddenly lacked in being your everyday transportation, he made up for by spamming you constantly online. 

“This place has Tim Tams in their cafeteria!” He’d send you the most random photos and videos of his day-to-day working in song production at the entertainment company, from actual work-related matters like sophisticated equipment he was allowed to use to the small things like the extensive cafeteria food and his boss’ pet Labrador. “What are you having for lunch?” 

Being a P.A. at a media network, however, was much more fast-paced and required you to be running everywhere on your work hours. Chan understood, of course (hence the sudden influx of dog photos during a particular period that had you working overtime almost every day), but it still made you feel bad for replying so late because, whether you admitted it or not, his constant updates alleviated your stress. 

More often than not, his spams would be responded with photos of you on the subway and video clips of Minho and his roommate who are always practicing cheer dance moves in their living room. “I had three Snickers today but I drank a lot of water so that should count for something!” You often replied, following with a clip of Minho falling on his butt after tiredly trying to land a flip. “This is your Minho update of the day. He’s getting there! I think he’s going to try out for cheer dance captain this year!” 

At the end of the semester, Chan was more than happy seeing you again, so much so that he treated you with lunch and even offered you ice cream after. “You’re going to make up for all the full meals you’ve missed this semester!” He insisted as he picked you up from Minho’s place. The two of you ended up at a ramen house which was a far jump from your usual fast food dates—something you thought about the entire time. 

“I’m pretty sure that’s not how it works.” You laughed but you let him order you food anyway since it was free. “Extra nori and eggs, please!” 

You exchanged internship stories throughout the entirety of your lunch, laughing along to his stories of falling asleep in the middle of work and hearing his endless teasing over you getting starstruck with assisting your favorite artists on the job. You didn’t actually miss out on a lot of his shenanigans (that’s how heavily he spammed you) but you stayed in the ramen house for more than two hours, unconsciously drifting off to different topics and gossiping about your friends until the slight embarrassment of overstaying creeped in.

“Speaking of friends, I haven’t seen everyone else lately too.” Chan mused on your ride back home. He had his CD he secretly produced over his internship period playing on the radio as well as one hand on the steering while while the other fought you over the air conditioning. “I just know that you and Jacob train for volleyball together on weekends, Lisa’s busy with club duties, Bam Bam’s on an exchange student thing and Jihyo recently introduced us to the person she’s dating now.” 

You leaned back in your seat and shrugged, finally giving up on the air conditioning to open the windows instead and admire the Han river on your side of the road. “Well, you know how Minho’s been doing with my updates and I haven’t seen Dahyun in a while too since she’s taking the most classes this semester.” You explained, extending your hand outside to feel the gentle Autumn breeze. Chan, despite being the swimmer between the two of you, thinks you’re crazy for liking the cold better. “As for many many other people I know, they’re either studying really hard or starting work now. Time flies and friends come and go, I guess...” 

When you glanced over at him again, you saw his face scrunched up in thought as his hands blindly found the gear stick to slow down at an intersection. Once you reach the red light, he then meets your gaze, uncertainty in his expression that he tried playing off with a shrug. “Yeah but...is it weird if I said I don’t want that to happen with us?” 

“N-No?” You found yourself answering before you could fully comprehend the question. Clearing your throat, you tried joking it off, “I think you might’ve taken the ‘I’m class president let me show you around’ thing back in high school, Chan.” 

He shrugged, smiling as well at this. “Maybe I did, who knows? I like spending time with you.” 

“I force you, you’re my ride around the city.” You teased, hints of sincerity coming through your tone of voice. 

“But that’s because I like you, isn’t that what people do with people they like?” He said it with so much nonchalance but you couldn’t help but feel flustered at this, a reaction you immediately hid by laughing. 

“You like me too much, it’s going to cause a traffic with all this sentimental stuff,” You pointed out, the cars behind you suddenly honking annoyedly as if on cue. “See? Even the people behind us agree.” 

Chan wasn’t offended, however, not one bit as he continued rambling about liking you all the way to your dorm after. It flustered you at first, especially with how casual he was being, but, as you neared the turn to your dorm outside of university, you eventually caught up with teasing him back about it. 

When you thought about it on your own once he left, you realized that you somehow liked it. It felt very natural—as if it’s something that’s always felt right hearing from him. 

“I like Chan.” 

“Yeah no shit.” Minho agrees absentmindedly, Seungmin and Jeongin nodding along while emptying their take-out boxes. You carpooled with Chan today as he drove Felix and Jisung somewhere to help them finish their term research paper. You were only supposed to hang out with Seungmin and Jeongin but Minho decided to ambush the three of you with Jihyo and Mina on their way to join your group at the younger boys’ dorm. “What else is new, Y/N? We haven’t met up like this in a while so I was expecting something spicier!” 

“No, I mean—” You roll your eyes at him, smacking him with your rolled up lecture notes but to no avail. The boy simply opened his phone to check his messages, frowning when he then comes across a message from Jihyo and Mina informing him that they’re stuck in traffic. “I really like Chan.”   

“Okay, and then?” 

“I’m telling you I actually like someone then you dismiss me.” 

“And I mean that took you a record-breaking three years to say.” Minho points out, finally closing his phone and propping an elbow up on the table to face you properly. “What has you sharing this to us on this fine Saturday, hm? Did you get jealous over someone again and got so insecure that you realize your feelings? Did you get stuck in a really small space, admired his face a bit then realize that you think he’s cute? Which trope is it?” 

You shake your head disapprovingly at him, briefly glaring at Seungmin and Jeongin when the two start snickering next to you before answering, “Nothing, just...we talked lately and I thought that I really like talking to him.” 

“So you don’t like talking to us?” It’s Jeongin teasing you this time as he sipped on his juice box, earning him a crumpled ball of paper on the head. “I thought it’d be more grand like in those K-Dramas.” 

“You flood your crush with Pepero boxes and now you’re talking big with K-Drama confessions.” Seungmin points out, making the other boy in question roll his eyes. 

You open your mouth to speak but Jeongin beats you to it. “Talk to me when you’ve confessed to that figure skater at your university, baseball boy.” He says before turning to you again, placing a hand over Seungmin’s face and dramatically pushing him away by his head. “Anyway, back on topic! So, will you ask him out?” 

“I don’t know, should I?” You frown, leaning back on the sofa behind you with your arms crossed. “Wouldn’t it be weird?” 

Minho shakes his head. “It’s 2020 so go wild, my friend. Anyway, if it doesn’t work out I already got my driver’s license—though I will tax you since you live far away.” 

You roll your eyes, hitting him again. When his roommate passes by, half-asleep and dragging their feet towards the kitchen, you hear them request another smack on Minho’s head on their behalf as if on instinct. “I mean, do you just go for it? What if you don’t feel enough for people for it to work out?” 

A pause then follows in the room, even Minho’s roommate momentarily stopped gulping down water from across the open common area. Seungmin and Minho sigh while Jeongin only raises an eyebrow with the same curiosity.

“Yes, Y/N.” Minho answers after a moment, tsking at you as he does so. This time, you gather the energy to smack him for the fourth time as quickly. “It’s dating not marriage, just see what works and what doesn’t.”

Seungmin opens his mouth to say something else, probably to comment on how Minho doesn’t apply the sentiments to his own love life, but he nods in agrement anyway. “I think it’s like you always tell me: don’t overthink it.” He adds instead, briefly turning his head to Minho after. “But I’m going to pretend you didn’t bring it up first, hyung.” 

Don’t overthink it. Even Jihyo and Mina agreed when they arrived, pestering you into going over your entire rant and dilemma again once they arrived with beer and convenience store food. Dahyun too, but only a little later when Jihyo puts her on FaceTime.

“Just wing it,” She even added to assure you, glitching a bit on video because public library wi-fi has never been better than that.. “it’s just Chan, what could go wrong?”

And really, with Chan, nothing ever does feels like it’s going to go wrong even when the situation has your heart on the line.

“Chan, give me your hand.” You extend your hand out to his side of the car with your palms facing upwards, chuckling when he glances over to you with wide eyes. “I won’t tickle you this time, promise.” 

“So what are you going to do?” He asks as he reluctantly moves his hand from the steering wheel to your hand, alternating his gaze between the road and you on his side in long intervals. “I’ll have you know that we’re about to turn to a narrower road so don’t try anything funny.” 

“Like I said, I’ll just hold your hand.” You feign a pout, bringing your hands down on the compartment in between your seats. “There.”

You won’t tell it to his face right now, of course, but holding his hand is comforting to you.

He invited you to a small film festival for today, a thirty-minute ride to a place he only heard of on the poster for it that he showed you at the start of the week. “Bam Bam’s too busy to come with so I thought I’d invite you since you’re free this week!” He explained over the phone and you knew Bam Bam is really busy when it’s you who Chan is inviting to these kinds of everyday. “They have lots of animated movies on the line-up too so I immediately thought of you!” 

“Your hands are so small.” Chan comments after a moment, shaking your intertwined fingers gently as the car stops at traffic. 

You poke on his knuckles in response. “You just have really big hands.” 

“Your hands are clammy too.” He points out next with a laugh. “Are you okay?”

“Because you won’t turn the air conditioning up, dumbass.” You roll your eyes, scoffing when he doesn’t move his hand anyway. “So why don’t you let go?” 

“Because I like holding your hand.” He shrugs, biting down a small smile. The traffic still won’t move and he takes this as an opportunity to look at you as much as he can. “I like you a lot—even with your clammy hands.” 

“I—” You freeze with your mouth hanging open, finally catching onto his smile. “Ya, what’s with the smile? Did you...did Minho say something?” 

“What? No. I can’t smile now?” And it’s the truth, you find out much later when Chan calls Minho for you and puts him on loud speaker to disprove your suspicions. “Why? What am I supposed to not know until now?” 

You squint your eyes suspiciously at him, shifting your hands around his but to no avail. “That I—I was going to say it first today. I like you too—a lot.” You sigh in defeat, leaning back on your seat and twisting your body to face him properly. The traffic is slowly starting to move again and Chan briefly turns away to move the car, turning to you as soon as traffic permits him again. “It’s a bit embarrassing to say right now, my hands are so clammy and you’re holding onto them the entire time.”

“It’s not because you’re nervous, right?” He asks with the smallest glint of teasing in his eyes which you shake your head at immediately. “It’s just us.” 

“I told you, it’s because the air conditioning’s too low.” You chuckle, finally relaxing your shoulders in relief. Chan then lifts your hands up to the air conditioning unit jokingly, turning up the level with his knuckles. “And it’s exactly why I’m not nervous, because it’s just us.” 

“Me too, to be honest. I’d be freaking out right now if Minho or Lisa or just anyone else peered over our shoulders.” You hear him mumble under his breath in a sheepish giggle. A thought then crosses his mind as he glances over to you, the traffic now moving much more smoothly. “So, I can still ask you if this is a date, right? The cinema’s still five minutes away with this traffic.” 

You pretend to purse your lips in thought, bringing your hands back down once they’ve dried with the sudden rise in temperature. “Isn’t this too last minute even for you?” You tease, making him frown. “Ah, well, better late than never I guess.” 

“I’ll make it up to you on the second date, promise.” He assures you, turning right to your destination. “Jus don’t back out on this being a date now, okay?” 

“Of course not.” 

“So boring.” It’s Bam Bam teasing you this time, Minho agreeing on the side. The one time he’s actually free to hang out and he sasses you throughout the entire night. “I expected more from you two.” 

“It’s...two people dating in college, not a romcom, Bam.” You deadpan before taking a sip of your soju. 

He shrugs from across the table anyway, passing you another bottle. “I guess being in love makes you a little boring. I don’t blame you.” 

You slap a hand up to your forehead while Chan is practically drunk and dying next to you in embarrassment. “Oh God...” 

[fenheart87]

manikin

Lukanette 2020 Exchange piece For @the-alice-of-hearts, enjoy! 

Marinette was on a mission,step outside of her comfort zone and again echoed by her technical design professor to be more daring and assertive and bold. She needed to round out her styles and portfolio as much as she could to make herself a more attractive candidate for any applications she submitted or even just expanding her online commissions and bulking her portfolio that way if she chose to start out on her own. It was difficult to just be set in one style and make it big when just starting. Mari figured that she would explore as much as she could before committing to one genre or style, it would keep her far from being burnt out like some of her fellow classmates.

“Hey Nathaniel! Have you seen Juleka?” She called out, walking a bit faster to the redhead who waited for her to join him.

“She was around this morning but I haven’t seen her since. Have you tried calling or texting her?”

“Yup, nothing but silence though. I’m out of touch with everyone’s schedules the more time goes by.”

“Is she complaining she can’t be super Mari and be our everyday ladybug again?” Marc teased, sneaking up and poking the shorter girl’s sides resulting in a squeal.

“Marc!” She smacked a red clad shoulder before they disappeared behind their boyfriend. “Stop doing that!”

“Stop making it so easy?” Nathaniel offered, smirking at Mari’s adorable pout.

“I hate you. I really do. Welp, if Juleka is busy and you’re both too shy to play model and dress up and have proof of it, I guess I need to find a model.”

“I’m pretty much free if you need a mannequin, class ends at three for me this week.” Marc offered kindly, green eyes peeping over Nathaniel’s shoulder.

“Oh wonderful! I found another sample fabric I wanted to try for you!” She did her jump and hip shimmy, ignoring the giggles.

“Only exception being Thursday, that’s date night this week.”

“Fine, have your boyfriend Marc on Thursday, I get your girlfriend Michelle the rest of the week. See you later!” Mari dashed away, giggling as the bright red spots on Marc’s cheeks.

After walking around campus and deciding against searching too far as she still had classes, she was no closer to finding her muse model but it did nothing to dampen her good mood. It was a sign that meant she would just have to explore the in and outs further and stay away from her usual haunts. Instead of using her eyes she decided to let her ears guide her, Marinette glanced around a few times and focused on conversations instead of what people were wearing, hearing the emotions in their voices. With the new mindset, carefully the young designer wandered around and sketched some expressions, new emotions to craft into fabric choices and color schemes to make them come alive as clothing to wear the emotion plain as day. There was a ton of laughter and giggles around her until she got closer to the library. The sound of a guitar drew her in like a sirens song.

Marinette needed a break from all the walking and climbing she had done so far and decided to stop by the library for the few books she had on hold. Skirting around the cliques that hugged the stairs more often than naught, the petite designer made her way into the library. Seeing Max working the check out desk, Marinette bee lined for him, smiling wide enough to crinkle eyes just slightly.

“Marinette, how are you today?” Max greeted, shuffling books around to scan them and write the names on the cards for the reserved items.

“I should have a few books on hold, all fashion related of course, there was one that was checked out but if you could see if it’s been returned?”

“Sure thing, book title, author or DEWY code?”

“There’s several, here’s my card.” Marinette held it out for Max to scan, rocking on heels slightly to a rhythm she could hear every time the door opened.

“Ah yes, you have five reserved and it looks like two have not been checked back on yet. Would you like me to check the return bin?” Max asked, finding the appropriate stack of books and setting them on the counter.

“Yes please, even if we can find one more that makes it easier to study and hopefully pass with flying colors.”

“Fashion has always been a huge part of you Marinette, as long as your heart is in it then you’ll pass with flying colors.” Max smiled at the rare blush on the young woman’s face, “I’ll check the returns for you, be right back.

Marinette breathed deeply to calm her sudden nerves, her friend’s unwavering faith in her abilities always managed to take the designer off guard but she wouldn’t change any of them for the world. While waiting, she filled out the cards for the books in the pile to make Max’s job easier but kept getting distracted by the wonderful music that kept sneaking through.

“I managed to find both luckily, if you could fill these out then you free to chase whatever has you so distracted.” The glint from his glasses made Marinette squeak in embarrassment as being caught.

“Thanks Max!” Quickly she stuffed the books in her backpack and marched at a reasonable pace to the door and only let out the breath she was holding once outside.

Students shuffled to and from the library, stopping to chat quietly or bask in the music for a moment before continuing their way. The solo guitarist was the center of attention, playing a mix of old and new songs. The overall genre seemed to be with the intent to soothe stressed students and teachers alike as they passed by, Marinette could feel herself relaxing and her creative block lifting. Deciding to obey her muse, the slim young woman snagged a bench that was being vacated by a couple who had finished their coffees. Unsure how much time had passed, the designer lost herself to the world of inspiration, completing outlines with notes and vague sketches with the knowledgeable experience telling her to be swift and flesh then out later.

The music had become a soft and sweet ballad, just hovering in the background for anyone to notice or ignore if they were passing by. Marinette took a quick glance at her outlines and notes, polishing little things or rewriting fabric choices, her eyes fell to the musician that she could finally see and she froze. This was exactly what she was looking for, his expression spoke of calm but hid the slight anxiety every time he started a new song. When he suddenly changed tunes and a couple stopped fighting because the music took over made his lips quirk in a faint grin. His clothes were made to blend in, ripped jeans and combat boots topped with a plain Jagged tee and lightweight layered Hoodie. That did absolutely nothing to help hide his hair with the blue tips, was that a tongue ring?! Marinette felt the need to sketch and design and she had to see what color his eyes were.

Swiftly but carefully she put away her supplies and made her way to the musician that was quietly packing away his guitar and removing the tips from his case. The designer caught his attention and when the weight of gaze met hers, Marinette just blurted out what came to mind.

“You’re hot, can I undress you?” With a squeak, she smacked her face with her sketchpad and took a few deep lungs full of air. “I’m sorry! I want your clothes- I just, you were playing and sound sexy- GOOD SOUND! I really like you- YOUR  style it’s mysterious but like nice- I really want to undress you- I mean I-!”

“Deep breaths.” His melodic voice cut through her anxiety like a hot knife to butter. “I’m Luka.”

“Ma-ma-Marinette!”

“Nice to meet your Ma-ma-Marinette. You’re an artist too?” He nodded causally to her sketchbook.

“Yes. Fashion designer. Project.” Few more deep breaths. “I need to branch out and try a new style and I usually create women’s clothes. So my professor told me to challenge myself and your music inspired me and when I looked at you, you’re perfect. That is- I mean, if you wouldn’t mind being my model?”

“So do I get to undress myself or is that your job?” Luka teased with a grin, causing Marinette to hide her face again with a squeak. “I have a crazy schedule but I’d love to help.”

“I have time on Tuesdays from two to five, Thursdays from five to seven and Saturdays after the morning rush so more like three or four to eight.” She rattled off, pulling out her planner to his amusement.

“Okay I’ll have to check my schedule, two of my classes are up in the air. How about we exchange phone numbers and then I can text you what’s my schedules going to look like? It changes week to week.”

“Most musicians do it seems, one of my best friends is a DJ and he takes all kinds of gigs so it’s hard to sit down and catch up.” They traded phones and saved their numbers before swapping back. “Some of this we can do via Skype if needed, you have to be comfortable with the design too and just wearing it to help my grade.”

“Seems like you’ve done this before.” Luka stuffed his phone into his pocket and packed away his guitar, shouldering his case.

“Fashion student, too broke for mannequins so I lure in unsuspecting folk with delicious free pastries from the best bakery in town.” She teased with a huge grin.

“Well then, I look forward to those pastries.”

Waving, they went their separate ways and Marinette had a skip in her step that had been missing due to the stress. Texting her other friends that were her usual models but this time with ideas of clothing to compliment the designs she had drafted for Luka. Everyone had a positive response and she had just enough people for a full collection, Marinette was sure to blow this project out of the water.

- - - 

Luka stared down at his phone with a smile. As far as first impressions go, he didn’t think negatively of Marinette. It was easy for the musician to recognize the spark of creativity making her blue bells shine and the dark circles the byproduct of sleepless nights from the muse keeping her awake to do her bidding. Her song was the dead giveaway, it was beautiful but unfinished with the crash of crescendos and decrescendos in spots, showing she was afraid to stay loud and bold.

“That had better not be another cat meme.” Juleka muttered, sliding into the booth across from him.

“Nope, I just got asked to undress for a pretty cute girl.”

“What girl wants to see you naked?”

“Not naked, she wants to dress me up.” Luka corrected, waving the waitress over so they could order. “Caramel cappuccino and one hot fudge vanilla shake.”

“Design student or art student?” Luka had no trouble hearing his sisters mumbles, even over the din of the coffee-shop.

“Design student, I guess she felt a good vibe with the music I was playing and she got bit by the creative bug.”

“Not the only one that got bit.” Juleka smiled innocently as the waitress set down their drink orders. “When’s your first fitting?”

“I don’t know, I told Marinette I would text her my schedule for the week once I figure it out.

"Well them, you had better bring me back an eclair and a chocolatine, try the macaroons.” With that cryptic advice, Juleka took her drink and left her brother confused. A ding from his phone had him opening a picture of a very familiar face forwarded from his sister.

Is this the ‘go get em tiger high-five from you?

You hurt her and you’ll answer to your future sister-in-law.

Thanks for the vote of confidence.

[imnotwolverine]

The marriage pact - Marriage material

Henry Cavill x OC Alice - multi-chapter

< Part 9 | Part 10 Marriage material | Part 11 >

Disclaimer: some strong language

Author’s note: I wanna slow dance like this real badly. Actually just any dancing really - darn Corona pandemic 😩

Word count: 1.315

(Link to my Masterlist)

--

Dear readers,

I am hearing wedding bells as the last of my unmarried friends is tying the knot today. I don’t know what dress to pick yet, especially as the weather is being a bit temperamental, but at least one rule is a nice to follow guideline; no white unless you’re the bride. Which is a bit of a strange thing isn’t it? Why do European brides wear white dresses, when practically all of them are far from innocent and pure virgins? I have looked it up, just for the fun of it, and the answer to this question is surprisingly British in its origins.

The very same British queen who made Christmas trees popular, was apparently also the one to set the trend to opt for white wedding dresses. She thought the white would best highlight the delicate lacework she had chosen for her dress, though the other, true reason for selecting white (originally used in times of mourning) was less pragmatic and more romantic; she wanted to marry Prince Albert not as a queen, but as a woman who loved the man she was about to marry. The dress did that by reflecting her purity, innocence, and good sense, the usual hefty royal crown also having been replaced by a flower wreath on her head. Now, my dear readers, that is about as romantic as life is going to get. 

Queen Victoria brought romance and tenderness to an up to that point rather unromantic affair. And for that she is my personal hero.

Romance isn’t dead, long live the queen!

Ali

‘Blue suits you.’ Henry smiled, leaning closer to my chair as dinner was running to an end. I smiled, eyeing him in his sharp cut tuxedo, his usually curly hair tamed back into a smooth coupe.

Would his kids have those curls too? Ugh, don’t think about it Ali.

‘Thanks.’ I whispered, the party now erupting in loud applause as it was apparently time for the first dance, the music swivelling over the classically laid out ball-room floor. It was a nicely set out space; white clothed tables for dinner on the far end and a large dancing area in the middle, a bar and DJ on the sides. No need to move locations, no need to fuss and there even was a little children’s nook with a babysitter, so the parents could indulge themselves in some champagne and good conversation.

Very smart thinking.

‘And now..a warm applause for the groom and bride. Our dear Daniel and Loïs...’ The DJ purred with a deep, husky voice into the microphone, some people laughing at the overly sensual tone of his voice, another applause quick to erupt through the thickening crowd around the dance floor. Me and Henry joined in, Henry moving his fingers to his lips to whistle, the energy of the whole room elated as the bridal pair swivelled in happy circles around the dance floor.

Once it was decent to stop applauding, the newly weds gleaming and beaming on the dance floor, more couples started to join.

Love was in the air.

‘Would you do me the honours?’ Henry asked politely, bowing slightly as he reached out for my hand. I giggled, nodding my head in delight, my hand simply taking his and letting him pull me close to his chest - closer than was truly necessary. ‘Such a romantic.’ I laughed. ‘Oh you know me.’ He buttered, smoothly snaking his arm lower on my naked back.

He wished to make it clear we weren’t just friends. 

‘You were already a romantic from the moment you could talk.’ I said, leaning back into his arm so I could see his deep blue eyes, my eyes missing the fact that more than a few people in the crowd were studying me and Henry - Henry was after all a famous face to see and up till this point we had kept our intimate gestures to an absolute minimum.

‘Remember when we were dating in your college years?’ He said, leading me with slow, but well coordinated steps past a few couples until we reached the most inner circle of the dancing crowd. ‘Sure. The rose petals on my bed and all.’ - ‘Yep..me near breaking my back trying to climb up to your room.’ We both sniffled, my cheeks glowing from his body heat and the sweet memory. 

‘You know, I’m really sorry for how it ended back then.’ His voice took on a more serious tone.

Our eyes met again as our feet carried us effortlessly over the smooth lacquered floor, the music of the first song carefully being mixed into another slow-dance tune. I swallowed at the vision of him, his eyes near sorrowful, pleading me to forgive him. One moment I felt myself floating like a feather, the next I felt heavy as a rock, my heart guilt tripping as I looked into his deep blue puppy eyes.

‘We were young Henry. No need to forgive..or forget. We had our fun, but it couldn’t work. You were getting your first big gigs, and I was not able to be without you, besides I had my work and my Master’s degree. I mean..’ I shrugged, feeling his warm hand brush comfortingly over the small of my back. ‘Still, we didn’t really end it well.’

‘Yea..it was a bit..sudden.’ I leaned back into his chest, not wishing to show him what I was thinking; would it happen again? It always started off well, but once Henry’s life got more career focused, there was no space left for me to live and breathe in. He also leaned in closer, understanding the hint, his nose breathing warm air in the shell of my ear.

‘Please be with me Ali. When I said I was committed; I am.’

I didn’t answer.

—

‘Hey sweetie! Had fun?’ Mom was sitting at the kitchen table wearing her fluffy slippers and pink bathrobe, hair pinned around some candy coloured foam rollers and make-up still on fleek - she looked like she came straight from the 50s. I grumbled something indiscernible, wishing to just grab another glass of wine before retreating to my room. ‘Sweetie?’ She asked, wishing for me to answer. 

‘Mommm.’ I sighed, annoyance thick in my voice. 

‘You look very pretty by the way. All for Henry?’ She tried, raising a pair of teasing eyebrows. ‘Ugh..mom. Just..not now okay?’

‘Okay then..’ She said, her eyes still following me as I pulled open the fridge door, her lips blowing over her cup of late night hot milk. ‘I can make you some hot milk if you’d like.’ She tried again.

I don’t know whether it was the champagne in my veins or the fact that I had been a bit blunt with Henry, but before I knew it I started to shake, a few silent tears coiling down my cheeks as I tried to pour in some wine - but failing. Miserably failing. Just like my life. 

‘Alright alright.’ Mom got up from her chair and took the bottle from me. 

‘Looks like you’re not chatty tonight.’ She moved her arm to brush a lock of hair behind my ear, but I evaded her touch. ‘Ugh..I feel like a teenager again, mom. And I hate it, I’m 37. I ain’t got time for this!’ 

‘Oh baby pea..come,’ She pushed me towards her chair, strong mom hands pressing me down to sit. ‘..let’s make you some hot milk.’ She said simply, turning on her slippers and moving back to the stove to heat up some milk. 

With her back still turned towards me she continued: ‘You know, you don’t always have to be so harsh on yourself, Ali sweet. Just try and enjoy life a little.’ 

I knew she meant those words well, but I didn’t share the feeling. Not right now. More tears burst through the high walls I had built and I quickly shielded my eyes with my hands, the fear of missing out on some of life’s greater experiences - having a lovely marriage and kids - haunting my every shivery breath. 

‘I don’t know if i can, mom. I’m trying, really. It’s just..hard. I feel like its a bit of my last chance and..ugh..I don’t know.’ I wiped away my mascara draining tears when she placed a steaming mug of hot milk before me. 

‘I know baby. I know.’ 

--

General tagsquad: @harrysthiccthighss​ @tumblnewby @magdelen69​ @thereisa8ella​ @mary-ann84​ @darkbooksarwin​ @summersong69​

Fluff lovers squad: @star017​ @perhaps2remember​ @pterodactylterrace​ @witchersqueen​ @desperate-and-broken​​ @toomanyfandomsshreya​​ @deliciouslysassyarcade​​ @pamacs-macs​​ @cavilladdict​​ @scorpionchild81​​ @lebguardians​​ @sofiebstar​​ @amberbabem​​ @mis-lil-red @aestheticqueenb​​ @misslalaland-blog-blog​ @ilieherecharmed-fics2readnrec​ @michelehansel​ @henryfanfics101​

Want to be added to or removed from the tag list? Shoot me a message!

[okayohay]

I Just Wanted To Be Edgy Too (Chapter 2)

I wanted to post the second chapter of my fic here, because not everyone uses Wattpad. Please let me know if you would like me to keep posting it! If you want to read ahead - you can find the story on Wattpad here

Hope you guys enjoy!

I Just Wanted To Be Edgy Too

Chapter Two

Van

I needed a change...

We ended our soundcheck with Overlap because I was sick of playing the same song every night. I was sick of singing about things that mattered when I was sixteen but didn't matter to me anymore. I wanted to do something different, so I did what I do best, jump into things unannounced. There was no warning to it. Bondy slid into the opening chords like usual and I cut him off with a riff.

He raised his eyebrows at me as I played the chorus of Overlap instead of Tyrants. Steve crossed his arms over his chest from the lighting platform in the middle of the floor and narrowed his eyes at me, a smug look on his face.

"I want to end with something else." I didn't wait for anyone's response, I just started singing the first verse, forgetting half of the words.

"Whoa, whoa, why Overlap? Why not something else?" Benji scratched the side of his face.

I kept playing the riff on a shrug. "What else?"

"I don't know man...something off of two? Something the fans already love?"

I strummed my guitar again and hummed the words. Overlap meant something to me, that's why I wanted to play it, but I didn't want to tell them that. I zoned out the questions and continued playing, even when the rest of them stopped.

Steve crossed the floor and stood in front of the barricade by the stage. "I like that you're ready to retire Tyrants, but you're going to play something people connect with."

"They'll connect with this if you give them the chance." I heard the edge in my voice.

Bondy cleared his throat and shook his head at me. I knew he was silently telling me it wasn't worth it. Overlap wasn't worth pushing Steve and I into another fight.

"You'll end with Cocoon." Steve said bluntly before he walked off with a flick of his wrist. My jaw locked into place as I ground my teeth together.

"Van, leave it." Bondy whispered.

I shook my head and flicked my hair from my face. "We'll play it now for good measure. I want to hear it live." I spun my finger around signaling the start of the song. Bob struck his drumsticks together and Benji and Bondy exchanged glances I pretended not to notice.

The song started slowly, just as it did on the album, and by the chorus, Bondy's smile returned and he was clearly enjoying playing something new. Even Bob's snare sounded different, a little bit more life to it, perhaps. Steve paid us no mind as he continued to fiddle with the lights and the soundboards, but the few roadies watching in the back seemed to enjoy the change to the set.

I sang the last lines out quickly, adding a few more words in here and there, and dragging out the last sentence rather than cutting it off. We finished and were met with a round of applause from the back. Steve looked up then, taking notice of the compliments and then pausing as he shook his head at me.

A few people walked toward the stage, a mix of roadies and local radio station DJs who couldn't wait to nab another piece of us during an interview. I rolled my eyes, noticing one girl holding a camera and scratching down words on a small black book. She stepped into the blue glow of the lights Steve had been working on, and I froze as she neared the stage. I was in no state of mind to do an interview right now, and I definitely wouldn't be having an interview with a girl looking like that. Her long hair wasn't blonde or brown, but somewhere lost in between the two, and it hung in loose waves over her shoulders. Her eyes were dark, maybe even a little too intense. I glanced at Steve for backup. He hadn't told me anything about a scheduled interview today, and I surely didn't want to go into one prior to a gig.

She said nothing as she stood by the barricade and jotted a few more sentences into her notebook. Bondy glanced at her a few times but shrugged his shoulders when I motioned to her. She looked young, mid to late twenties maybe, and she never said a word to any of us, just kept scribbling quickly into her book. I frowned. If she had something to write about me, I'd like to be the one giving her the information.

She looked up and locked eyes with me then, a shudder rippled through me. She was dead gorgeous, but I've learned to never trust a writer, despite their looks. Never trust a writer at all; trust me.

I jutted my chin at her as I sat my guitar down. "Can we do ya a favor or somet?" My accent was thick, spewing out half word phrases from back home, something that only happened when I was mad, or full of feelings I couldn't get out.

Benji looked up instantly, recognizing my tone and how many times it preceded an argument or a shitty interview. He glanced from me, to the girl, and back to me.

"Van..." he raised his free hand at me but I shrugged it off.

"No, no, no I want to know what she wants from us. She's bloody good at jottin' it down in her book, I just want to know what she's gettin’ on at before I read about it in some magazine or on the internet later."

The nameless girl's face reddened, and she closed the black book and shoved it behind her into her camera bag. She didn't leave though, she just kind of stood there keeping her sites on me, like I was a ghost on the stage and she was looking right through me.

"Van, lad...ease up a bit. It's not what you think. That's her; Barns' girlfriend."

My gaze shifted back to the girl, leaning into a roadie and speaking in his ear. Well fuck.

I bit down on my lip, jumped off the stage and stood next to the barricade. "Sorry love, who did you say you were?"

She pressed herself into the barricade and began pulling her hair into a pony tail. "I didn't. I think you were too worried about me being a journalist to care."

I said nothing, which was a rarity for me. She picked up on my hesitation and sighed. "I'm Ellie." The redness returning to her cheeks.

"You're not a journalist?"

"Legally no, but in her free time she writes damn good articles for a blog." Barns stepped beside her and wrapped her in his arms, kissing her hard. She flinched at first, until she realized it was him and relaxed. I turned away and raked a hand through my hair.

Barns Courtney had been opening for us on and off for months. At first, it was all fun and games, whiskey and beers after shows, sitting around after gigs getting high on shitty weed he'd pull from his pocket. But it escalated into moments of him shattering the glass of a hotel window, or getting in a fight with Larry. It was shortly after that when Steve caught him with more than just weed. He dug him out of several moments of chaos and kept him out of jail in Dallas, but none of that calmed him down. He started bringing more girls around, and that's when I found out he had a girlfriend. I kind of shut down the friendship at that point. The drugs, the girls, all of it...I'd already lived that life and let it ruin me. I didn't need it to happen again. There was enough of me that liked the wild side too much. I'd spent too much time dabbling in hard liquor and cocaine, and it cost me my better judgment. That cost me a relationship, and my anger from the relationship ending cost me any chance at a friendship. I'd lost my way a bit, lost a lot of things, and I swore I'd never do that again.

Barns made me nervous. He had too much of an edge for me to want to be around. His words were stale and full of poison when he tossed them at me or any one of the lads. Watching him kiss the girl he'd been cheating on for weeks felt wrong. It all felt wrong. My stomach churned.

When he finished with her, he shifted his weight to his other leg and smirked. His signature red leather jacket was hanging loosely off him, no shirt underneath. "This is my girlfriend, Ellie." His tone harassed me, the corners of his lips pulling upwards. "She writes for a music blog, I told her to use whatever she wants from the tour."

I shifted my gaze back to the woman who was now biting at her fingernails nervously. "You're staying for the rest of the tour then?"

She nodded and looked back at Barns casually. Barns smiled at her before nodding at me. "I'll catch up with you in a bit babe, I need to talk to Van."

She smiled and stepped away quickly, turning back once to gaze at us both. She hesitated for a moment before opening her mouth. "You should play that song. Maybe don't end with it, but it's a real barn burner. It'd be good in your set." I blinked a few times as I contemplated what she was saying before she turned around again. When she was out of earshot Barns leaned in and pressed his hand into my shoulder. "Remember our deal, McCann. She doesn't need to know about the shit from last week, or the ones before that. I love her, I don't want to hurt her like that."

I laughed and shook my head. "Some deep love you got there, mate." I removed his hand from my shoulder and climbed back onto the stage.

"Come on, man. Be cool." Barns flashed his perfectly straight teeth at me, but there was no authenticity in his smile. It was forced, he was the big bad wolf and he was in sheep's clothing. This was a threat.

I nodded at him. "Yeah, man whatever."

Barns patted the top of the barricade with his hands and spun around quickly, leaving the four of us to our instruments and the last few minutes of soundcheck.

"What was that all about?" Bondy asked as he wiped down the neck of his guitar and motioned to Barns.

I shrugged as Barns disappeared from site. "Get rid of Rango and play Overlap in its spot. Don't tell Steve, just have Larry change the list."

"You wanna cut Rango?" Bob chimed in from the background, disbelief hanging off the vowels of his words.

I nodded once and picked my guitar up again, the first chords in the song echoed through the empty venue.

[sunkissedpages]

We’re Only Kidding Ourselves- Part Sixteen || Tom Holland x Reader

A/N: okay there is NOT smut in this part I lied but not on purpose that will be next week sljdlkjasjd it got too late for me to include it but that’s a problem for next week me

Prompt: Enemies to lovers au (from @marvelellie‘s 1k writing challenge!!)

Summary: You work as a production assistant for the Spider-Man: Far From Home crew, or rather as Tom Holland’s handler. The two of you don’t get along very well to say the least, but you won’t quit and he can’t fire you so you’re stuck with each other.

Warnings: swearing, mentions of body image issues

What I listened to while writing: the ocean b i t c h

Word Count: 3.7k

Part One | Part Two | Part Three | Part Four | Part Five | Part Six | Part Seven | Part Eight | Part Nine| Part Ten | Part Eleven | Part Twelve | Part Thirteen | Part Fourteen | Part Fifteen 

You weren’t a huge fan of beer, but Tom was buying the rounds and that’s what he kept bringing over to the table, and what were you supposed to do? Not drink it? It’d be rude, and turning down free alcohol wasn’t really your style.

After a short, unremarkable dinner at an overpriced tourist spot, the four of you had wound up at a bar, against your better judgement. It was odd to be spending time together as...friends. It was different from the Czech Republic, because now the animosity between you and Tom had been dialed back to almost nothing (aside from the elephant in the room he still didn’t know about), and you were still adjusting to it. The friendly nudges on the shoulder, the laughs sent in your direction, the jokes made at your expense- without any hint of malice. They were all things you’d experienced with Harrison before, but never Tom, and it was disorienting you more than the beer was.

This bar was different from the one the mandatory event had been at two nights ago. No one was in favor of going back there, even if you were the tiniest bit curious about whether DJ would remember you. But after getting shitfaced there last time, everyone thought it was for the best if the group of you went somewhere else, which brought you to this hole in the wall. You had stumbled across it on accident on the way to another bar. The walking GPS had taken the four of you down a narrow alleyway when you passed what you had thought was a garage with loud music pouring out of it. It was another, much lower rated, bar, but they had a live band and that was what sold it.

The band wasn’t half bad and the drummer was kind of cute, but you had to yell across the table to hear each other and it was beyond crowded. The band’s sound reminded you of a small garage band from your hometown that had gotten kind of popular when you were in high school. You couldn’t remember their name, but they played a bunch of gigs at bars and you’d always try to sneak into them with your friends. You’d actually slept with the drummer from that band one winter break in college, so maybe that was why you were so partial to drummers.

At some point in the conversation Harrison excused himself to the bathroom and Tom made another trip to the bar leaving you alone with Harry. Your conversation earlier had been so awkward, that you couldn’t think of anything to say now.

“That picture you took of me sucked,” Harry practically shouted at you, breaking the tension.

You hadn’t been expecting him to say anything and it made you choke in your drink with laughter.

“I thought maybe it could be artsy,” you said defensively, referring to how the different colored lights blended together in the background, obscuring him as the subject.

“No, it was just blurry.”

“Oh, I didn’t know you knew everything about photography,”

“More than you.”

“Fuck off,”

Harry flipped you off from across the table and you whipped out your phone to snap a picture of him before he could put his finger down.

“How’s this one look?” you asked, turning the screen towards him.

“Still awful.”

“Give me break,” you huffed in irritation, earning a chuckle of pity from Harry.

“I’ll teach you, don’t worry.”

You were only halfway through your second Peroni when Tom brought over four more beers, since everyone else had already finished theirs, and slid one of them over to you.You narrowed your eyes in suspicion.

“What are you up to, Holland?” you asked.

He raised his eyebrows at the nickname. “Definitely not trying to get you to spill all of your secrets, that’s for sure,” he laughed.

“I’m an open book,” you said, lying right to his face.

He scrunched his nose and shook his head. “That’s not true. I don’t know anything about you.”

You rolled your eyes and took a sip from the glass you were still working on.  “Are you kidding me? We’ve worked together for months now we know each other.”

“You know all about me, literally everything about me, it’s your job. But I don’t know anything about you.”

“Everyone at this table knows I don’t know everything about you,” you said, trying to defer. “Don’t make me look like a fool twice.”

Tom leaned back and took a swig from his new drink. It wasn’t a threat, but it wasn’t an empty statement either, and by looking into his eyes you knew he understood.

“I wasn’t-“

“Hey guys there’s a pool table in the back,” Harrison interrupted, returning from the bathroom. He paused, looking back and forth between you and Tom, unaware of what he had just walked into. Tom cleared his throat awkwardly. “Do you all, uh, want to play?”

“Sure,” you agreed immediately, not wanting to dive any further into the gray area you'd gotten yourself into with Tom. You downed the rest of your beer and hopped down from the stool, leaving the full one on the table behind you.

You followed Harrison to the back of the bar, weaving through the mass of people holding on to the hood of his sweatshirt so you wouldn’t lose him. Harry and Tom weren’t far behind. If you’d learned anything about the Hollands it was that they were extremely competitive and weren’t ones to turn down a challenge so this game was about to be interesting.

The lighting was dimmer in the back, and the music and conversation sounded distant now, but it was nice. Whoever had been last to play had left in the middle of their game, leaving the billiard balls scattered all around the table.

Harrison and Tom started setting up the game while you grabbed a couple of cue sticks from the wall.

“Me and Harrison versus you and Harry,” Tom said, and clapped hands with Haz who was already on Tom’s side of the table.

“My own blood,” Harry scoffed, feigning offense at not being chosen as Tom’s partner.

“Sorry, mate trying to win,” Harrison shot back with a wicked grin.

Part of you wondered how often Tom favored Haz over Harry and if anyone was keeping count. The other part of you was a little offended that you were so clearly the teammate to get stuck with. Another thing to bring you back to high school, when you’d get picked last in gym class because of your reputation for your athleticism, or lack thereof.

You fought the urge to roll your eyes in annoyance. “I’m standing right here.”

“Please tell me your pool skills are better than your photography skills,” Harry pleaded and you shot him a look.

“Guess you’ll have to hope for the best, since you’re stuck with me.”

All the boys knew your coordination skills weren’t...the best. Your reputation of clumsiness had certainly followed you everywhere, but they didn’t know you used to sneak into bars when you were in high school, and that there was a pool table inside of every single one.

“Ladies first,” Tom said, and removed the triangle mold from the table.

You didn’t respond, only brushed past him to get to the head of the table.

You placed the white ball on the felt and aimed your cue stick at it. With a swift hit, it rolled into the middle and knocked the colored balls on the table in all directions. Luckily, an orange ball rolled into the far left pocket, making you and Harry the solid team.

You went for another, but missed. Harry clapped you on the back anyway, clearly impressed you had scored any points at all.

“Nice, y/n,” Harrison complimented once your turn was over, but you ignored him.

“Mate, whose team are you on?” Tom asked with a nudge to Harrison. He shrugged defensively and pushed Tom back, signaling to him that it was his turn.

Tom rolled his head and shoulders dramatically as he approached the corner where the white ball sat. He angled himself loosely, but purposefully in front of it and wasted no time sending it colliding into a ball with a green stripe. Everyone held their breath as it rolled toward the same pocket yours had gone into and you exhaled in defeat when it tipped over the edge and into the woven net.

The whole game was like that, one shot after another, a point and then a miss, making it a close game the whole time. You could hold your own, but the boys had been in plenty more bars than you had and you were all varying levels of drunk, with you on the tipsier side. Everyone was joking and talking shit about each other and somewhere in the middle of the game you actually started to have fun again. You got to show off a trick move your dad had taught you when you were first learning that had them losing their shit, begging you to do it again with their phones out and pointed at you.

Somehow you and Harry pulled it off with you scoring double points towards the very end and him finishing it off with the eight ball on his next turn.

“Don’t say I never did anything for you,” you said, pointing at Harry after he’d had taken a victory lap around the table.

“I’m sorry I doubted you,” he apologized with admittance.

“You should be I just kicked all of your asses and I can do it again,” you declared, not hearing how your words were starting to slur.

“You did not we were tied for most of it,” Tom argued. “And I’m drunk.”

“We’re all drunk,” you corrected him. “You’re just a sore loser.”

“Accept your loss with dignity, mate,” Harry smirked and tipped his glass back, draining the remainder of beer from it.

“I’m impressed with your skills, y/n,” Harrison said, holding out his hand for a shake. “Good game.”

You just looked at his hand out in front of you. “I’m also good at skeeball.”

The next few days in Italy passed without much incident. There was still chatter on set about your mistake with the headset, which you always double checked was off now, which you probably should have been doing before. You didn’t even talk over headset that often and after yesterday you wanted to use it as little as possible. You were worried that as soon as it cut off whoever was on the other side of the line would just start talking about you, but it wasn’t like there was anything you could do about it.

You never heard about it from anyone above you, though. None of your bosses on set or back at HQ ever contacted you about anything out of the ordinary, so at least you still had a job. It was probably too awkward for anyone to bring up, which was equally as horrifying as it was relieving.

Every time Tom came up to you you were sure he was going to say something to you about the dream, but everyone was being surprisingly tight-lipped about the whole ordeal, which was unusual for the film industry.

Most of the cast apart from Tom and Jake Gyllenhaal left two days before the crew, getting a few days off before they were due in New York. As much as you missed all the horrible fast food there you weren’t as excited to go back to the States as you thought you’d be, even though it meant you were one step closer to this job being over.

You spent the morning of the last day in Venice packing most of your things so you wouldn’t have to do it ridiculously early tomorrow. Tom’s stuff was still absolutely everywhere, he had yet to pack any of it, and you wondered how this boy managed to get anywhere without losing half of his stuff. You were tempted to start doing the packing for him, but knew he’d only be pissed if you did. He was one of those people who believed that every thing had its place and you knew you’d get it wrong if you tried. Plus, things had been going well between the two of you the past few days and you didn’t want to ruin that by letting your handler side get the better of you.

You were almost out the door to meet everyone downstairs for the day when you got a message from Tom, asking you to approve an Instagram post for his feed. You smiled to yourself when you saw it was the picture you’d taken of him that night before dinner. It had only barely been touched by a filter, making the whole picture a little brighter. You liked the way it made his eyes look, and you liked the fact that he had been looking at you.

He’d tagged Harry in the picture and the caption, since he couldn’t tag you of course (he didn’t even follow you) which you thought was a little overkill, but you sent him an approval message anyway since you were running late and everything else looked fine.

When Watts called wrap at the end of the day it felt like a weight had been lifted off your shoulders. You couldn’t wait to get back to the room and just read for the rest of the night. Maybe order room service.

Everyone clapped like they did when it was a full wrap day since production was moving to a new location and you usually didn’t like to glorify the actors more than they already were, but you joined in, clapping for yourself since you had made it so far, and through so much.

As soon as you were curled up on your side of the bed with your book Tom came crashing into the room from where ever he had just been bursting with energy. He rambled to you about dinner with Watts and Jake and how he and the boys were going to go up to the pool  on the roof to go night swimming and about the flight the next day and everything in between.You were only able to follow about half of it, nodding where you thought was appropriate and working in ‘uh huhs’ when you had the energy..

It wasn’t Tom’s fault that his presence commanded so much attention, but you wished that at least once he could walk into a room without captivating everything and everyone in it.

“You should come to the pool with us,” Tom said, popping his head out of the bathroom where he’d been talking to you from.

“Isn’t it cold?”

“It’s a heated pool.”

You shook your head with uncertainty. “My swimsuit is at the bottom of my suitcase,” you protested.

“Come on, it’s our last night in Italy. Don’t you want to make some memories? It’ll be fun, I promise.”

You scrunched up your face, and Tom smirked because he knew you couldn’t say no to him, boss or not. “Fine.” His face lit up with victory. “I’ll meet you up there.”

You stood from the bed with a sigh one the door had shut behind Tom. Digging through your suitcase was even more difficult than you thought it’d be, and clothes were all over the floor once you found your bikini.

Putting it on was a chore as well because as much as you liked the print and color of it, it had taken you a long time to feel comfortable in a swimsuit, and sometimes it was still difficult to shrug off the insecurities that prickled in the back of your mind.

You took one of the clean towels from the bathroom and wrapped it around your body, hoping you wouldn’t run into any other guests in the hall on your way upstairs. Since the pool was only one floor up, you took the stairs, bracing yourself for the crowd of people sure to be out there. It was empty, aside from the boys who were already in the pool, batting around some sort of sports ball.

What you hadn’t been prepared for, though, was the view, and the chill. You wrapped your towel tighter around you, not sure if it would do any good, and took a step closer to the railing. The boys had yet to notice you and you took the opportunity to admire your surroundings. As much as you were relieved to be leaving the city tomorrow, you couldn’t deny that Venice was beautiful, especially at night. Small clusters of stars twinkled around the sky, and the moon hung low, partially hidden behind some distant buildings.

It was mostly dark, but a few windows were lit from within. You imagined parents tucking their children into bed who had stayed up past their bedtime, friends pouring themselves another glass of wine, and lovers putting on an old record and swaying to the rhythm until the needle reached the center.

“Y/n, you made it!” Harrison’s familiar voice called from behind you, and you turned, ripping yourself away from the city and all it’s untold stories.

“I did,” you said awkwardly and cleared your throat. The boys were clearly waiting for you to join them, but you were still standing off to the side with a towel wrapped around your body.

As quickly as humanly possible you unwrapped the towel from yourself unceremoniously and dropped it onto an adjacent pool chair. You felt pairs of eyes taking over your body, but you weren’t sure who they belonged to.

Not bothering to prolong what was already a painful process, you stepped down into the water until you were level with the rest of them, meeting eyes with Tom, waiting for him to take the lead.

He hesitated. You realized that for once the positions of power had been switched and instead of you being the one to tell him what to do, he was going to be telling you. You hoped the power wouldn’t go to his head.

“What about Marco Polo?” he suggested and everyone kind of rolled their eyes. “Anyone got any better ideas?”

No one did, so Marco Polo it was. Tom was it first since he had suggested it and everyone spread out as far as they could across the length of the pool. It wasn’t very big, which made the game pretty easy.

Tom’s arms weren’t very long, but he was fast and before you knew it his fingers were brushing your bare side signaling that it was your turn.

You weren’t as talented as Tom was. Your round took considerably longer than his had, and you spent a lot of time splashing around aimlessly, trying to ignore Harry’s laughter in the background. You wanted to get Tom back for tagging you, but ended up all but tackling Harrison into the water on accident. Either way, your turn was over.

You opened your eyes to find yourself clinging to Harrison’s back like a koala. Sheepishly, you detached yourself from his body and pushed back the hair that had gotten into your face.

“All you had to do was tag me, y/n,” he said, grinning and you shrugged apologetically.

“Just wanted to make sure I got you.”

The game went on for longer than you thought it would, and as it went on you got progressively more competitive. You pushed and shoved your way through the other boys to avoid being it again, and you had a pretty good streak going until Harrison got you back by accidentally backhanding you lightly across the face during his turn.

He opened his eyes with horror. “I’m so sorry I thought I was going for Tom’s shoulder!”

You touched your face gently where it still stung from the impact. “Right,” you joked, but stopped mid-sentence when you realized how bad he really felt about it. “Hey it’s fine, it was an accident.”

“I hit you.”

“We were playing around, I tackled you earlier it’s okay, really.”

Harrison reluctantly agreed, but you all moved on to a different game after that. Harry brought out a football for the four of you to toss around and that’s what you did until Haz decided to call it. He gave some excuse about getting up early for the flight tomorrow and hopped out of the water without further explanation. You knew he still felt shitty about what had happened during Marco Polo, but you didn’t know what to do to make him feel better.

Harry went with him since they were sharing a room, leaving you and Tom alone in the pool tossing the football back and forth. You figured you’d just go back to the room whenever Tom was ready since you wouldn’t be able to sleep until he was back anyway.

“What's your middle name?” Tom asked, breaking the silence that had hung in the air since the other two had left.

You struggled not to laugh. “What? Why?”

“I told you the other night, I don’t know anything about you. This is me trying to learn.”

“Well it sounds like you’re trying to steal my identity.”

He shrugged. “Added bonus.”

“It’s y/m/n, but I’m pretty sure Tom Holland doesn’t need a social security number from someone like me.”

“Maybe not, but I hear American passports are very valuable.” He tossed the football back to you. “Don’t you want to know my middle name?”

“Isn’t it Stanley?” you asked and he frowned. “I sign so many papers with your legal name on it, you shouldn’t be surprised.”

“You’re right.”

“When am I not?” You quirked an eyebrow and Tom retaliated by throwing the football further than you could reach on purpose, sending it rolling onto the deck underneath the lounge chairs.

The ball was neglected to be found as Tom continued to pester you with more questions. You humored him and answered them all, telling him about your parents, hometown, college, and how your record for shotgunnning a beer was four seconds.

He listened to everything quietly, only stopping you to boast about his two and a half second shotgun record.

You never thought you’d be having this conversation with Tom Holland of all people, yet here you were, trading stories about near alcohol poisoning under the night sky on the roof of a hotel. 

“Guess no one else wants to swim tonight,” you commented offhandedly, glancing around the pool area that had been empty all night.

“Oh, the pool’s been closed since eleven.”

“What?”

this probably has hella typos but i’m so tired. smut next week!! sorry again for all the confustion. lmk what you think I always appreciate feedback!!

Forever Tags: @mischiefmanaged49 @bookingbee @cloverrover @captainbuckyy @perhaps-he-schnapped  @awkwardfangirl2014 @the-queen-procrastinator @tastingthestarz @sleepybesson @everythingbooknerd @sunshine96love @bitchymathematician @livingincompletesilence @melsbooktrash @swim-deep-or-die @fizzy828 @spider-slutt @theamuz

WOKO Tags:  @parkerstylesperalta @marvelellie @splashofbi @learning-howto-be-myselfx3 @timelock97 @ohheyitsem @starsholland @honeymoonparker @zeenee @musicgirl234 @brozekey3215 @tryn25  @gracie4290 @lovinnholland @bluparis @summernykole @alt-ernativewonderland @hbmoore1986 @falling-stars-never-cry @in-the-corner-coffee-please @mihcellejones @lillypedalsxx @thedaydreamingwriter @being-deadly-sirius @sherizaraiyah@missmillions @ive-got-some-lies-to-tell @tomsmelanin @dangerousluv1 @xitzbrookiex @illletitgrow @pleaseforthesakeofmysanity @fangirl-juchan @awkwardnesshabitat @hardzzello @canadianjelly @gioandreolli @obsessedmaggiemay @almostrosadiaz @beepboop67 @stargazerholland @claredolphinbear24 @storytimexmendes  @lokihatemyselff

send me an ask to be added/removed from a taglist

[killervibe]

The (God)Parent Trap

Killervibefanficweek18 Day 2: Undercover Missions!

Notes: This is a future fic that really took a life of its own!! It’s fluffy and I had a lot of fun writing it, enjoy!! <3

The (God)Parent Trap

Cisco knew this was a bad idea the moment this club’s DJ decided Rebecca Black’s Friday was worthy of being played.

Cisco shot Caitlin an agonized look.

Caitlin winced sympathetically, and opened her clutch for her phone. “I’m going to text Barry to let him know we made it in. You can try to fix the music.”

Cisco straightened his tie and marched over to the DJ’s booth with the determination of a soldier. “Oh, I’m three steps ahead of you,” he called over his shoulder, and grinned at the fond yet exasperated look on her face.

The DJ is a lanky, nerdy thing, very much similar to old pictures of Barry Iris showed Cisco from their days in high school. He tapped the kid on the shoulder, waiting for him to stop bopping to this horrible excuse of a song and remove his headphones.

“I’m sorry, Friday? What year is this, 2011?”

“I think it’s pretty rocking.”

Cisco groaned. “Okay, how much are they paying you for this gig? Fifty? Eighty? One Hundred?” Cisco slid over several twenty from his pocket. “I will double whatever they’re offering if you play something better. I’m desperate.”

The boy looked at the cash longingly, but shook his head.

“Sorry Sir, this song was requested.”

“By who?” Cisco cried, trying to forget that this dude called him sir. He may not be twenty-three anymore, and he may be wearing an itchy fake mustache, but god forbid anyone actually starts treating Cisco like an old irrelevant man.

The DJ pointed out a bossy girl teetering in heels wearing a flower crown.

“Oh Lord, she’s just as crazy as her father,” Cisco muttered under his breath. Of course it had to be Yelena, Dr. Sinister’s fourteen year old daughter.

Cisco rolled his eyes and left the DJ to his horrible life choices, maneuvering around the cheering pre-adolescent children on the dance floor as they slosh their orange crush over the rims of their red solo cups.

“It’s no use,” Cisco grumbled to Caitlin, who was leaning against the wall as Friday faded out and Miley Cyrus circa 2008 started next. He grabbed two drinks from a passing caterer tray. 

He peered into the first glass.

“Shirley Temple?” Cisco guessed, handing the pink concoction to Caitlin.

“Thanks,” she said. She took a careful sip, grimaced, then rolled her eyes at finding Cisco covering his ears like a child.  

“What do you expect?”  She said, and Cisco let out a long tired sigh. He hates when she excuses crazy situations they get themselves into with logic.  “This is a teenage dance hall converted into a makeshift club for the birthday party of a 14 year old who happens to be best friends with the daughter of Barry’s newest arch nemesis.”

“What I expect is to not have to fear that my brain will bleed out of my ears before the end of the day!”

“You’re being so dramatic,” Caitlin laughed, “As if you don’t love Lady Gaga and Katy Perry.”

Cisco scoffed, offended. “I’m sorry but Poker Face cannot even compare to Fly On The Wall and you know it.”

A teenager came up to them then. “Excuse me, are you two the chaperones?”

Caitlin bended down, “Yes! My name is Katherine Rodriguez and this is my husband, Arlo. We’re Sonya’s parents.”

The kid gave Caitlin and Cisco a once over. “You two don’t look anything like her.”

They shoot each other a quick look before both replying at the same time.

“She looks like her grandmother.”

“She’s adopted.”

Caitlin stepped on Cisco’s foot. “Uh, what we mean is we adopted Sonya when she was three but we were told she looks like her maternal grandmother.”

The girl snapped her gum, “Yeah, whatever. We’re, like, not friends or anything.”

Cisco tilted his head to the side and squinted. “Is there a point to this or…”

The girl seemed to remember the reason why she came and perked up, “Oh this is, like, tbh, really awkward now, but I just wanted to let you know that I caught her picking on Yelena. Maybe you should go and see what’s going on.”

Yelena Sinister. Dr. Sinister’s daughter. Perfect. The plan was working.

Caitlin tucked a strand of hair behind her ear, and blinked innocently. Cisco snorts. Is that how Caitlin thought it looked to be motherly? He’d tease her later about it if he didn’t find it so weirdly endearing. “Oh, I’m sure it’s just a misunderstanding,” Caitlin said, placatingly.

The kid looked skeptical, but put her hands up as if to say Oh well I tried  and turned back to the buffet table.

“Arlo?” Cisco exclaimed, scandalized, once the girl was out of earshot.  

“It rhymes with Cisco!” Caitlin defended, peering over the crowd for Nora. “It should be any moment now.”

“Are you sure she knows what she’s doing?” Cisco asked.

Caitlin nodded, “It’s Nora. She practically begged us to let her do it. Besides, you know she’d do anything to help her dad with a mission. Even if it means crashing a lame party and going by the terrible fake name Sonya.”

Cisco stopped sipping his club soda to retort, “Like Sonya is so much worse than Arlo.”

Cisco could feel they were just about to get into an epic bickering match over names when a man about five years older than Cisco comes towards them. 

“Excuse me,” The man interrupted politely.

He was tall and somewhat handsome, but very obviously not naturally blonde. However, Cisco supposed it wasn’t fair to judge. Caitlin was sporting a ginger wig, like she was channeling a young Molly Ringwald and Cisco’s own fake mustache and goatee Iris forced onto him made him laugh so hard the first time he saw himself in a mirror, they almost flew off his face.

“Are you the other chaperone?”

The question was pointed at Cisco.

“Yes, I’m Arlo,” Cisco introduced himself, and he really did have to fake the smile. He shook his hand, “And this is my wife, Katherine.”

“Oh!” The man flushed pink and began to stutter. “Oh, we met before.”

Caitlin began to flush too, and Cisco sensed he was missing something.

“Really...When was this?” Cisco asked.

“I believe you were with the DJ. You know, it’s so refreshing to hear our children listen to appropriate songs, thank you for reminding the DJ of that.”

Caitlin hid her laugh in a cough as Cisco’s fake smile turned into a pained expression.

“Well, yes. That’s my job, protecting the children,” Cisco said smoothly.

The man turned to Caitlin.

“I’m so terribly sorry, Katherine. I didn’t know you were married or else I never would’ve said those things.”

Cisco raised an eyebrow, “I’m sorry, what? Wait...Were you flirting with my wife?”

Cisco found himself getting ticked off, and it was weird, how he didn’t even have to pretend to feel vindictive. How he had no real claim at all over Caitlin but he still wanted to put his arm around her waist and drag her the hell away from this man.

Cisco didn’t like the way he looked at her. Cisco didn’t like the way she looked at him either, especially with her all flustered like this.  

Caitlin put her hand on Cisco’s arm, sensing his discomfort. “I thought Eric was being friendly, I swear. It didn’t click until just now.”

Caitlin’s explanation felt sincere, and Cisco felt himself unwind when Caitlin kissed his cheek, for show, obviously, but still, it was a nice gesture for him...Or was it for Arlo? Cisco was starting to get confused.

For what it’s worth, the man truly did seem like he wanted a hole to swallow him up.

“I’m so sorry I flirted with your wife, man. I was just saying she looks so young to have a teenage daughter.” Eric paused to look at Cisco, “I mean, so do you. Also, I couldn’t help but notice neither of you wear wedding rings.”

Oh damn. Cisco knew they forgot something.

Caitlin smiled tightly. “We’re both allergic to gold, not that it’s any of your business.”

“Of course. Again, my apologies. Anyway, whose parents are you again?”

“Sonya.”

“How old is she?”

Cisco and Caitlin both spoke at the same time. Again.

“Eleven.”

“Fourteen.”

This was why Cisco and Caitlin hated working undercover.They sucked. 

All three chuckled awkwardly.

Cisco cleared his throat, “We adopted Sonya when she was three...” He began, and Caitlin continued on for him when he began to falter.

“Exactly, so she’s really fourteen in age but we’ve only had her for eleven.”

They linked their arms together, smiling charmingly.

Speaking of their fake daughter, Cisco was hoping Nora picked up the pace so they could call Dr. Sinister already and get him out of his lair. Barry must’ve been staked out there for over two hours now.

Nosy Eric, as Cisco began to call him in his head, even though he probably doesn’t deserve it, frowned. “My daughter never mentioned her before. How does she know Vanessa?”

“Who?” Cisco frowned.

“Vanessa? My daughter.” Eric began to grow impatient, “The birthday girl.”

“Oh, right, I’m sorry, I couldn’t hear you over this wholesome music!” Cisco replied, snidely.

Caitlin jabbed an elbow into Cisco’s rib. “Sonya was invited by Yelena. They go to piano lessons together.”

“I see. Wait a minute...Yelena doesn’t go to piano lessons. She does ballet.”

Thankfully, Nora swooped in and saved them when a loud crash followed by shrieking caused everyone to swerve their heads to see what the commotion was.

Cisco, Caitlin and Eric ran over to the dessert table where Nora was bent over, hands on her knees, laughing her ass off at Yelena who was on the floor, covered head to toe with hot melted chocolate from Vanessa’s chocolate fountain.

“You little bitch!” Yelena cried, slipping in the gooey mess as Vanessa stood several feet away completely stunned.

“Language!” Eric scolded at her, but it became very clear he agreed. 

The snitch that advised Caitlin and Cisco crossed her arms over her chest and sighed loudly, “I warned you.”

All of their friends were pointing and laughing, which would’ve made Cisco feel a little bad if she wasn’t the spoiled brat spawn of one of Earth’s most despicable metahumans. 

It was time to spring to action.

Cisco offered Yelena a hand as Eric began to scream at Caitlin about Nora ruining his daughter’s party.

“Your daughter did this?! I thought you said they were friends!” Eric accused, snapping at the teens to put their phones away.

“I can’t believe Sonya did this, I’m so sorry,” Caitlin apologized profusely, pretending to be aghast.

Cisco looked at his goddaughter straight in the eye and mentally psyched himself to sound as fatherly and as angry as possible when all he wanted to do was laugh. She quirked an eyebrow challengingly with a mischievous smirk.

“Sonya Isabella Rodriguez how dare you,” he scolded, “Your mother and I raised you so much better than this. Have you not one ounce of shame? This behaviour of yours is out of hand!”

Nora pinched her fingers together discreetly, telling him to tone it down a notch.

“But Daaaaaaaaad!” Nora whined, “You would’ve done it too if you knew what she’s like!”

“I don’t care,” Cisco said, “You’re coming home immediately. Apologize to this poor girl right away. Also you’re grounded.”

Caitlin rushed to the table to get napkins and wiped off the chocolate from Yelena’s hands.

“Here,” she said, whipping he phone out where it was conveniently left at the dial page. “Call your parents, honey. They’ll pick you up.”

Smart move, Cisco thought. Now Caitlin will have Dr. Sinister’s cell phone number, a valuable asset for tracking him in the future, and potentially finding out where else he goes.

Teary-eyed and humiliated, Yelena took Caitlin’s phone gingerly and called her father. She began wailing into the phone, and Cisco continued to fake berate Nora until she hung up.

“My daddy is coming right away to pick me up,” Yelena sniffed, picking her wilted flower crown from off the sticky floor.

Cisco shuffled Nora towards her. “Yelena, Sonya has something she’d like to say.”

Caitlin grabbed her cell back,  texting Barry that Dr. Sinister should be leaving any minute, and that he should go ahead the moment the coast is clear.

Yelena shot Cisco a death glare she definitely learned from her father. “Your daughter is a fake ass wannabe weirdo who doesn’t even go to our middle school! I never invited you! Nobody knows who you are! How dare you crash Vanessa’s party!”

Nora’s jaw dropped, “Yeah, well you’re a prissy princess daddy’s girl! Even worse, your dad is a total psycho!”

Yelena gasped, then lunged at Nora, slapping her right across the face.

Cisco sent Caitlin a panicked look. Name calling and slapping fights that could end up exposing their fake identities during their undercover mission was not part of the plan.

“Okaaay! That’s enough! We’re going home now!” Cisco said in a rush, dragging Nora away by the collar of her skater dress. Quickly, Nora sped the three off to the dance hall’s lobby where Cisco opened a breach and they all quickly jumped through it and into Star Labs.

~.~

Iris startled at the control board of the cortex. She surveyed the three of them catching their breath and narrowed her eyes. 

“Why is there chocolate all over my eleven year old daughter’s hair?”

Nora threw both her hands up in the air, “You were the one who said Uncle Cisco and Aunt Caitlin needed me to get into the party!” 

Iris opened her mouth, closed it, then opened it again. “Well... Yes, but it was their job to end the party and get Dr. Sinister out of his lair! Not yours.”

“Hey,” Said Cisco, putting a hand on Nora’s shoulder. “We were the ones that let   Nora get involved in the mission, and she did an excellent job, if not slightly carried away at the end, but who could blame her.”

Iris massaged her temples, “You couldn’t have pulled the fire alarm or something?”

Caitlin shrugged sheepishly, “...We didn’t think of that.”

“Sweetie, come here,” Iris said to Nora, but at that moment Barry’s voice crackled over the intercom system, requesting Iris and Cisco for help.

 He must have found something in Dr. Sinister’s lair.

“Ah crap,” Iris sighed, “Caitlin, do you mind?”

Caitlin shook her head and beckoned Nora over to the Med Bay, “Here, let’s get you cleaned up.”

She made Nora sit on the examining table and wet some paper towels to wipe the chocolate out of her hair.

“That was fun,” Nora said happily.

“I”m glad you thought so, but I’m sorry you got hit. Does it hurt?”

“Not really,” Nora reached towards Caitlin’s head to take off the red wig. “You looked like Kim Possible.”

“I’ll take that as a compliment,” Caitlin smiled.

“Aunt Caitlin, can I ask you a question?”

Caitlin turned off the water faucet, and turned towards her, all ears.

“Sure,” Caitlin replied.

“I saw that guy talking to you. Why didn’t you get his number?”

Caitlin raised an eyebrow at the little speedster. This wasn’t what she had in mind when Nora asked to chat. 

“It would’ve blown the cover. I was pretending to be married to Uncle Cisco, remember?”

“But you’re not in real life!”  Nora objected.

Caitlin handed her a junior sized Star Labs sweatshirt and sweatpants to change into. Nora hopped off the table to get dressed.

“Yes,” Caitlin agreed, “But that man didn’t know that. I didn’t want his number anyway.”

“Why not?” Nora asked innocently.

“I just didn’t.” 

“So if you’re not with anyone, and you’re not really with Uncle Cisco, then why haven’t you or Uncle Cisco ever had a boyfriend or girlfriend?”

Caitlin paused, taken aback. It was true that she had been single for a long time, but coincidentally, Caitlin had never been more content in her life than she was now. She had her life back in order, she had struck up an unlikely friendship with her alter ego, who had been less Killer and more Frost for several peaceful years. She made amends with her mother and was in fact really proud of her work with Barry, Star Labs and her personal research.

 “I can’t speak for Uncle Cisco but I’m happy with my life as is. I don’t need anyone new.” Caitlin looked out the window at Cisco, giving Barry directions of what kind of tech to look for in Dr. Sinister’s lab and sighed wistfully.She was right. She didn’t need anyone new. It was an old friend that she had wrapped around her finger.  

Nora followed her gaze.

“You looked awfully happy pretending to be Mrs. Rodriguez, though,” Nora pointed out.

Caitlin blushed. It wasn’t lost on her that there was a lot of truth to that statement. “I was playing pretend,” Caitlin insisted, knowing how weak that sounded..

Nora put a hand on her hip sassily, pursing her lips a lot like her mother.

“Were you, though?” She pressed.

Caitlin ruffled the damp hair of Nora’s head, shutting down the conversation all together. She loved the kid, but she sure was Barry Allen’s daughter, meddling in personal affairs.  “You’re all good to go. Why don’t you run home to your brother. I’m sure he misses you.”

“Yeah, okay.”

Caitlin opened a drawer and handed her a lollipop. Nora rolled her eyes. “I’m too old for these.”

Cisco peeked his head in at that moment, his faux facial hair all gone, “No no,” He admonished, “You’re never too old for candy.”

He snatched Nora’s lollipop out of her hand, unwrapped the plastic and plopped it in his mouth. “Your loss my gain,” he said, muffled around the candy.

“Just think about what I said,” Nora told Caitlin, then sped out the building.

Cisco leaned forward. “What was she talking about?”

Caitlin fiddled with her medicine drawers. “Um,” she said lightly, shaking her head like it was no big deal, “Just about us being Mr. and Mrs. Rodriguez. She didn’t quite believe that we were acting.”

Cisco sat in down heavily in Caitlin’s office chair. “But you told her we were…” 

“Of course.” 

Cisco sighed. “Right.” 

Caitlin turned around, curious at Cisco’s tone of voice. “Why, you wish we weren’t?” She felt overly conscious about the way her heart  sudden quickened in pace.

Cisco made a contemplative humming noise, “Weeeellll,” he dragged out the word, avoiding Caitlin’s gaze. He toyed his dress shoes into the floor as he swiveled left-right-left in her chair and removed the candy from his mouth. 

“Arlo might’ve been a little jealous that a man was interested in his wife. It made him feel a bit stupid. Arlo has this amazing beautiful woman and he never really tells her enough what she means to him, he always kind of assumed she knew.”

“Ah,” Caitlin responded. Cisco glanced up at her, vulnerability written all over his face. “What does Katherine think?”

Caitlin lifted a shoulder, nonchalant. “Katherine was too wrapped up in her feelings about Arlo to even notice that another man was interested. Katherine felt silly that she lost her touch. And then she felt not so silly, because who was she trying to impress, if Arlo cared about her so deeply without her even having to try?”

“Really?” 

They weren’t joking anymore. 

Caitlin nodded. “Yeah.” 

“I do,” Cisco breathed. “Care about you deeply. So much. For so long.”

Caitlin felt like she might die. In a really good way. In a ‘I ate three belly burgers and had one milkshake too many but I’m so very happy’ way.

“Is this Arlo talking or Cisco?” Caitlin teased, holding her breath.

Cisco stood up and grabbed Caitlin’s hand, tugging her towards him. “It’s Cisco,” He said softly, seriously. “It’s me. I’d be lying if I said you’re not who I want. Who I think about all the time. Who I’d want to be my partner in crime not just when we fight crime.”

Caitlin squeezed their joint hands. “That’s a relief. Caitlin feels the same way.”

Cisco moved closer, following Caitlin with his eyes, beaming. He leaned in just as Caitlin placed her hands on his waist when Nora zipped back into the Med Bay with her twin brother in tow, scaring the two half to death.

They jumped into each other’s arms as Nora crowed in victory. “Thank you speedforce!” She exclaimed, “I did it! You owe me ten bucks!”

“Congratulations,” Don cheered as unenthusiastically as a kid could sound. “No offense, but I thought it was never going to happen.” He handed Nora a crumpled Hamilton.

“See, I told you it would work!” She stuck her tongue out at Don smugly.

Suddenly all the puzzle pieces clicked. “Wait a minute…” Cisco said, shaking his head at Nora, impressed. “We’ve been bamboozled! You were the one that put the idea that we should be your fake parents in our heads! You set us up!”

“To be fair,” Nora pointed out, “You are our godparents, so it’s not like it’s that unrealistic.”  

Caitlin tilted her head, thinking that reasoning over. “I don’t think that’s how it works.”

“Who cares!” Nora cried, “You’re together now!” 

“Okay, thank you, we owe you. Now let us have our moment!” Cisco said, ushering the Tornado Twins away. 

They zoomed off, and Cisco could hear Iris yelling after them as he pulled the curtain around the bed. 

“Now,” Cisco said, winking, “Where were--Mmmph!”  

 Caitlin cut Cisco off, finally bestowing him their long awaited kiss. 

[finn-nelson-for-the-win]

Here is this list for the "Drabble Challenge: 1-150", They are many (sorry), but you can mix several in the same story, right?It's just that I can not stand with just a few ideas, I would love to read them all :P, and several of these not only imagine them with Rae and Finn, I love it when the gang is involved :P so, these are the numbers: 10, 12, 17, 29, 41, 45, 49, 55, 58!!!!, 68, 73, 76, 93, 99, 128, 132, 148, 149. Thank you girl, you are the best!

Hello, my dear! Let’s just pretend that ithasn’t been 3 months since you sent me this ask request and I’m barely gettingaround to posting this now, alright? Cool! Now that we have that allsettled…for this story, I chose three of the prompts you suggested off ofthis list (#58, 68, and 76) and put them all into one story…I hope you enjoy! :)

(Side note: This story takes place in like2005/2006 but it’s safe to assume that most of the events leading up to thoseyears happened canonically as they did in the show itself.)

***

The final notes of “Seven Nation Army” by TheWhite Stripes faded out as the song ended and the radio DJ sat up in his chairto transition to the next thing on the agenda for today’s show.

“Hello, ladies, gentlemen, and all you cool catsout there who know sound music when ya hear it! I’m Mad Matt and you’relistening to Mad Matt in the Morning on this lovely Saturday morning. If you’rejust tuning in to the show as you get your morning started, I have quite thesurprise for all of you listeners out there right after this commercial break,so go get yourself a cuppa and some toast and hurry back to your radio…you’renot gonna wanna miss this.”

After the short commercial break, Matt glancedover to the large window where his producer was sitting on the opposite sideoutside of the studio, waiting for his cue to begin talking.

“Welcome back to Mad Matt in the Morning! I knowI’ve been hinting at my surprise for you guys all week and I’ve been trying tokeep it a secret, but some of you callers seem to have already guessed what Ihad up my sleeve…well no matter…today in the studio we are so lucky to havean amazing and talented music producer from Lincolnshire. Please join me inwelcoming the one, the only…Finn Nelson!”

The radio DJ pressed the cheers and applausebuttons on the effects board in front of him as he shifted his focus over thetowards chair on the other side of the studio that has been occupied since thecommercial break.

“Hello, it’s such an honor to have ya on theshow this morning!” Matt said into the microphone with his body angled towardFinn in his desk chair.

“Good morning, Matt! It’s such a pleasure to behere!”

“Nonsense! The pleasure is all mine, Finn! Howare you this morning?”

“I’m alright. It’s a bit earlier than I’m usedto, but I’ll manage,” Finn replied with a slight chuckle.

“Wonderful! So I’m fairly certain that unlessyou’ve been living under a rock, everyone and their mums knows the name ‘FinnNelson’, but could you just give me a brief introduction about yourself, Finn?”

“Uh, yeah, of course…let’s see, I’m FinnNelson. I grew up in Stamford but I’ve been living in London for almost 5 yearsnow. I produce and record music professionally and sometimes when I have thetime or opportunity, I do a bit of DJing.”

“Thank you for that, Finn. In case the listenersout there aren’t aware, Finn is also very humble and has definitely downplayedhis talents and successes.”

Finn chuckled and shrugged, a motion that Mattknew was a subconscious response, since the gesture would not be picked up byany of the radio show listeners.

“Correct me if I’m wrong, but in the span ofonly a few short years, you’ve gone from a college student to an amateur DJ toa very popular DJ to one of the most successful independent music producers inLondon…all by the age of..?”

“Uh, I’m 28 right now.”

“Bloody hell, you’ve accomplished all that andyou’re not even 30 yet! Where did all of this start? Did ya just wake up onemorning and decide that you wanted to take the music world by storm or..?”

“Pretty much! No, I’m just joking, but I feellike I’m so lucky to be where I am right now, but I feel like I was alwaysgonna do something in music.”

“How so?” Matt asked, nodding for Finn toproceed with the story.

“Well, since I was a boy, I loved music andlistening to records with my da and Nan. I was never too good in school, but Iwas just there because everyone else was there. When I finished with college, Iworked days at a garage repairing cars and I had a friend of a friend thatwould DJ at some of the raves I went to and he offered to teach me a thing ortwo…

“I picked up on it all fairly quickly and beforelong I was getting my own DJing gigs at raves and clubs in the city.

“I moved from Stamford to Bristol for a fewyears and I kept DJing on a more regular basis, but in my spare time I begancreating music and recording some of the stuff I was creating,” Finn said,stopping the recounting of his life story for a moment while gathering histhoughts.

“I hate to butt in, but do you mean to tell methat you’re self-taught for producing music?” Matt asked when there was anatural pause in Finn’s story.

“Yeah! I liked playing music and when I startedmaking music I liked that too. At my DJing gigs I began playing some of myoriginal music and I started gaining popularity for it.

“One night after a gig I was approached by amusic producer that was trying to create a recording label of collaborativeartists and producers…He was starting this thing from the ground and he wasvery candid and told me that it was very likely that the label would be a flop,but if it worked it would give me full control of what music I was creating andhelp me get my music out there in a more formal sense.

“I wasn’t sure if I should take the risk, butsomeone that I care very deeply for convinced me that it was worth a shot, soless than a month later I was relocating my entire life from Bristol to Londonto help Jay and a few other artists such as myself to build this label up fromthe ground…and by some miracle, it worked!

“The label gained popularity quite quickly andnow here I am…living in London with my family, producing music, and gettingpaid to listen to music all day. I’m basically living 17 year old Finn’sbiggest dream!”

Finn and Matt chuckled at the conclusion ofFinn’s story when Matt looked up to see that his producer was giving him thecue to move onto the next thing that was planned, for the sake of time.

“That’s incredible! We’re gonna take a break andplay some music for a bit, but when we come back, we’re gonna take somequestions from listeners that are calling in. So Finn, would you care to do thehonors and introduce this next song?”

“Uh, yeah, sure! I’ve been a massive fan of thisband since I was a teenager and I still love them today, this is ‘BeverlyHills’ from Weezer,”

“And we’re out!” Matt said as the ON AIR signbeside the studio door went dim and he removed the headphones from over hisears.

Finn removed his own headphones as well and satback in his chair, away from the microphones on the large recording desk infront of him.

“Great job so far, Finn! We have about 10minutes before we’re back on the air, so you’re welcome to walk around, use thetoilet, and grab a snack…whatever you’d like to do for the next few minutes.”

“Great, thank you!”

“Hiya Matt, Dan wants to speak to you when youhave the chance—oh! Sorry, I didn’t mean to interrupt. Is now a good time?”

“No need to apologize, Bella, we just went offthe air. I’ll go chat with Dan right now. Can you go grab a couple waterbottles for Finn and me and bring them in here for when we’re back on the air?”

“Absolutely! I’ll be right back!” Bella noddedbefore quickly turning around and leaving the studio toward the long hallway onthe left.

“Heh, sorry about that. That’s Bella, one of ournew interns. She’s lovely and great at her job, but she can be a bit nervouswhen we have guests in the studio. She’d never admit to it, but I think she’s apretty big fan of yours,” Matt explained as he stood from his seat and grabbedhis cell phone from the studio desk beside him.

“A fan…of me? Wow, I’m flattered!” Finnreplied quietly.

Matt left the studio and Finn remained seated inhis chair, spinning idly in his desk chair out of boredom.

A few minutes later, Finn heard the door to thestudio open suddenly and jumped in surprise as he used his foot against thedesk as a brake to stop the movement of his chair.

“Oh! You surprised me!”

“Sorry! I was just bringing in the waters thatMatt asked for. Do you need anything else while I’m here, Mr. Nelson?” Bellaasked nervously as she placed the water bottles on the desk and retreated backtowards the studio door just as Matt walked back into the studio and sat backdown in his chair.

“Mr. Nelson makes me sound like an old man, youcan just call me Finn. And no, I think I’m alright, thank you!” Finn repliedwith a polite smile.

Bella smiled and nodded at Finn and Matt beforeturning away to open the door of the studio.

As soon as she opened the door, a young boy raninto the studio, dodging past Bella’s legs.

“Daddy!”

The young boy ran clumsily towards Finn and Finnquickly picked him up and placed him onto his lap.

“I’m so sorry, Matt. It looks like we may havefound ourselves a runaway,” Finn joked.

“No need to apologize! Who is this adorablelittle guy?”

“I’m Ian!” The boy replied with a wide grin.

“This is my son. He was supposed to be waitingin the lobby with his mum, but it looks like he managed to slip away from her,”Finn replied with a chuckle as he used a hand to tousle his son’s shaggy brownhair.

“Mummy said I could get a snack, butdaddy…guess what they have? Chocolate biscuits!” the boy exclaimed with awein his eyes as he opened his small palm to show his dad the half-eatenchocolate biscuit he was holding.

“Oh, you know how much your daddy loveschocolate biscuits! You still shouldn’t have ran away from mummy though, she’sprobably worried sick trying to find you right now!”

“I was a bit worried at first,” replied a voicefrom the doorway as a tall, curvy woman walked into the studio, “but then Ijust followed the trail of biscuit crumbs left behind and it led me right toyou!”

“Mummy!” the young boy called as his mumapproached him and lifted him from his dad’s lap and settled him on one of herhips.

“Sorry if this little rascal disturbed youguys,” the boy’s mum said as she gave Matt an apologetic smile.

“No need to apologize, we’re on a break rightnow, so it didn’t interrupt anything. He’s adorable, by the way. How old ishe?”

“I’m this many years old!” the young boy said ashe held up both hands with his all his chubby fingers extended fully.

“He’sfour years old,” his mum replied with a chuckle, “Sorry for not introducingmyself properly. I’m Finn’s wife, Rae!”

“It’s lovely to meet you, Rae! I’m Matt as in‘Mad Matt in the Morning’”

“Yeah, I’m a big fan of your show! I’m so happyto finally meet you!”

“Mummy…can we go now?” the small boy whinedquietly as he wrapped his arms around Rae’s neck and rested his head on hershoulder.

“Almost baby boy…Daddy just needs to finishthis and then we can go,”

“But daddy promised!”

“I know I promised you, Buddy, but I’m almostdone here. I pinky promise!”

“Aw, is the little guy getting tired?” Mattasked as he offered Ian another chocolate biscuit from the packet on his desk.

“Probably, yeah,” Rae replied as she used a handto gently stroke the back of her son’s head as he nibbled on the biscuit.

“Ian wasn’t happy to see me leaving early thismorning for the show today, so I made a deal with him that if he came with meto the show and was a good boy, we’d go to the zoo afterwards,” Finn explainedas he gazed affectionately at his young son cuddled up in the arms of his wife.

“Oh, I see! Well in that case,” Matt turnedtowards Ian and offered him the last biscuit in the packet, “I will try to makesure that your Daddy finishes up as quickly as possible so he can keep hispromise to take you to the zoo!”

The young boy perked up slightly and grinnedwidely.

“That’s very nice of Matt to do, don’t youthink, Ian? What do you say when someone does something nice for you?”

“Thank you, Matt!” Ian exclaimed.

“You’re welcome, little guy! It’s almost timefor your Daddy and I to go back on the radio, but what do you say to sittingwith my friend Dan on the other side of the window over there and watching usfrom there? He has lots of fun buttons and switches that I’m sure he will letyou press if you ask him nicely,”

“Yes, please!”

Dan walked through the door of the studio andsmiled at Rae and Ian.

“Good morning! I’m Dan, you two can follow me ifyou’d like and I’ll be happy to let little Ian here be my assistant for therest of the show, if he wants to, that is…”

Ian’s eyes lit up and he began squirming againstRae’s hip with excitement.

“I guess that’s my cue to leave too,” Rae saidas she walked over to Finn and leaned down to give him a quick peck on thelips, “I’ll be watching from just the other side of the window, so try not tomess up too badly,” Rae joked as she pulled away from the kiss.

“I’ll see you in a bit, my love,” Finn repliedwith a smile as Rae and Ian walked out of the studio and closed the door behindthemselves.

“Alright, Finn! The break is just wrapping upnow, are you ready to take some listener’s calls?”

“Yeah, that sounds good to me!”

Finn and Matt sat back down in their chairs andplaced their headphones over their ears as soon as they saw Dan on the oppositeside of the glass giving them a countdown before pointing at the switch for Ianto flip that turned the ON AIR sign back on.

“Hello, hello and welcome back to ‘Mad Matt inthe Morning’! I am Mad Matt coming at you live and in the studio with the oneand only Finn Nelson!”

“Good morning! I’m so glad to be here!” Finnadded conversationally.

“In case any of you listeners are just tuning innow, Finn started off the show by giving us a bit of a run-down of how he rosefrom an average college student in Stamford to a very well-known London musicproducer, and wow! What a great story that was!

“I said that when we came back Finn and I wouldbe taking some calls from listeners, so if you have any questions or commentsfor either of us, you know what to do! While we are waiting for the calls tocome in, I really need to tell you all about the cutest thing that happenedduring our short break,”

“Oh geez,” Finn chuckled lightly under hisbreath as Matt looked over at Finn and then at Rae and Ian where they sat onthe opposite side of the window.

“While we were on break, I had the pleasure ofmeeting Finn’s adorable young son, Ian, and his lovely wife and I have to saythat you have a beautiful little family, Finn.”

“Thank you very much! My family is my everythingand I know that I wouldn’t be where I am today without them—especially withoutmy wife, Rae, since she has and always will be my biggest supporter and I cannever thank her enough.”

“How long have you and Rae been together?”

“We met one summer before college when I was 17and before long we were dating. We stayed together for the rest of college andI moved with her when she was attending Uni in Bristol. After she graduated wegot married and moved to London and a little less than two years later Ian wasborn. Ever since I met her, my life has been so much happier and even now, 11years later, I’m so thankful for the first time that I asked Rae to go bowlingwith me and she was foolish enough to agree!”

Finn looked up at Rae through the window in timeto see Rae smile and blow him a kiss.

“I honestly can’t handle how cute these twolovebirds are! Alright, let’s go ahead and take some calls before I spend therest of our time on the show today just talking about how perfect your wife andson are…caller 1, what’s your name?”

“Hi! My name is Mary,”

“Thanks for calling in, Mary! Do you have aquestion or comment for Finn or I?”

“I just wanted to call in and say that I’m amassive fan of Mad Matt in the Morning and I was listening to your show at workand nearly screamed when I found out that the special guest for today was FinnNelson. I’m such a massive fan of yours too, Finn!”

“Thank you, my dear, I really appreciate it!”Finn replied in complete sincerity.

“You’re welcome! I remember seeing you DJ at oneof the clubs in Bristol a few years back and now you’re making music in Londonand I’m so happy that you’ve had the success that you have so far. I should getback to work now, but have a great day!”

“Thanks again for calling, Mary! Next caller,you’re on the air with Mad Matt and Finn Nelson!”

“Thanks for taking my call! My name is Paul andI had a question for Finn,”

“Sure thing, man. What’s your question?”

“I know that you’ve been a fan of music sinceyou were a kid, but now that you are producing music, do you have any specificinspirations that you look to when making music?”

“That’s a great question! I guess I just try tomake music that I would want to listen to myself. Growing up I listened to alot of Oasis, The Stone Roses, Bowie, but I don’t know that I’m trying to copytheir music by any means. I’m just trying to create something that I’m proud ofand that I think people would want to hear.”

“Thanks again for the question, Paul! I think wehave time for a couple more calls today, so we’ll take the caller on line 5,please!”

“Hiya, my name is Jenny and I just wanted to saythat I’ve really enjoyed Finn being a guest on your show today, Mad Matt! Doyou think you’ll be inviting him back again, perhaps to do a radio takeoverlike you’ve done with other guests in the past?”

“I’d love to have Finn back in the studio againas long as he is willing to be a guest on the show again. I was only able tobook his interview on the show today because I know a friend of a friend whohas connections with one of the other producers on Finn’s label and they owedme a favor, but of course I’d be more than happy to have Finn back again!”

“And I’d be more than happy to come back at somepoint, Matt! Maybe after the show today we can try to coordinate schedules tofind out when we could make this happen!”

“Wonderful! I look forward to hearing you backon Mad Matt in the Morning sometime in the future!”

“Thanks again for calling in, Jenny. And ourlast caller, I understand, is from Lincolnshire just like you, Finn. Isn’t thatright?”

“Yeah, hiya! I’m Ryan and I live inLincolnshire. I really look up to you as a mentor, Finn, and I’ve been tryingto make my way into the music business as well, but I’m not quite sure where tostart…do ya have any suggestions or words of advice?”

“It’s great to meet ya, Ryan! You sound prettyyoung. How old are ya?”

“I’m 16,”

“Ah, so not much younger than I was when I firstgot started in music. I would say that if you want to get into music, you needto really love what you are doing and want to learn about it all from thebottom up. If you just want to be famous, you might be able to gain somepopularity, but it likely won’t last. You have to keep working hard to become betterat what you do and honing your craft. I don’t know how helpful that really is,but…”

“No, that’s perfect! It really means a lot to mecoming from you, Finn!”

“No problem, Ryan! And look, I’ll tell you what:keep working and practicing and as soon as you have a demo or something to showoff, send it my way and I’ll have a listen. I’d love to have you in my studioand I’ll gladly help you out if you ever find yourself in London.”

“Are you serious? You’re practically like a godto my friends and I, so they are never going to believe this!”

“I appreciate the flattery, Ryan, but I’m reallynothing special. I’m just a guy with awife, two kids, and a Harley.” Finn replied with a laugh.

“Thanks for calling in, Ryan. That’s all thecalls we have time for today, but really quickly before we go…Did I just hearyou say that you had two kids, Finn?”

“I, uh…did I say that? I—uh, I meant,” Finnlooked up at Rae through the window who was currently hiding a smile behind herhand and Matt could clearly see her shoulders shaking slightly with containedlaughter.

“I, uh…Well, my wife Rae and I wanted to goabout this a bit differently, but thanks to my big mouth, I guess the secret isout.”

“Are you saying what I think you’re saying,Finn?”

“Indeed! I’m so happy to announce that my wifeis a little over four months pregnant with our second child and little Ian isgoing to be a big brother!”

“Congratulations to both of you! I can onlyimagine how exciting this must be for you and your family, even if this wasn’tnecessarily the way that you wanted to announce the news. That’s all the timewe have for on Mad Matt in the Morning today! I’m Mad Matt…”

“And I’m Finn Nelson,”

“And we are signing off! Be sure to join metomorrow morning and every weekend, right here on Mad Matt in the Morning onKISS 101.7…To end today’s show, let’s take it back to one of my favorite bandsof the 90’s…this is Oasis with ‘Champagne Supernova’!”

Matt looked up to see Ian flipping the switchand the ON AIR sign went dim again as Finn removed his headphones and rose fromhis chair into a stretch.

“Thanks again for coming on the show today,Finn! The listeners really seemed to love it and I really enjoyed chatting withyou!”

“Likewise! And I meant it when I said that I’dlove to be invited back on this show again in the future!”

“Great, I’ll be sure to talk to Dan and some ofthe higher ups that handle all the scheduling and we can try to work somethingout!”

Rae and Ian opened the door to the studio andIan bolted towards Finn as he leaned down to lift him into his arms.

“Did I do good, Daddy? Dan told me which buttonsto push and I tried my hardest to do a good job!”

“You were amazing, buddy! I’m so proud of you!”

Rae walked to stand behind Finn’s desk chair andleaned down slightly to rest her arms over his shoulders from behind.

“Rae! I’m sorry that Finn’s little announcementhappened the way that it did, but I just wanted to congratulate both of youagain for having a second child on the way!” Matt replied sheepishly, takingpart of the blame for their secret being exposed.

“Thank you, Matt! I knew it was only a matter oftime before Finn let it slip because it seems like that’s all he’s been talkingabout with me and my mum for the last month or two, but I’m so excited for thenew challenges this is going to bring!”

Finn turned his head to the side to place agentle kiss on Rae’s hand that was resting over his shoulder and Matt couldn’tresist smiling and the tenderness of the simple gesture.

“Mummy…can we go now? Please?” Ian asked,jutting out his lower lip slightly as he looked between the adults in the roomwith puppy dog eyes that cut through the resolve of even the toughest men.

“Yes, baby boy, we can go now. Do you want tosay bye-bye to Matt and Dan before we go?” Rae asked as she straightened up andadjusted the straps of the denim backpack she was wearing over her shoulders.

“Yeah!” Ian squirmed in Finn’s arms where he wasseated in the desk chair with this dad before Finn released him and helped himonto the ground to stand up in front of the chair.

“Alright, buddy. Go over to Matt and give him ahigh-five and knuckles and then we can go, alright?”

Ian ran to the chair where Matt was sitting andlifted his small hand outward for Matt to high-five before curling his chubbyfingers into a tiny fist for Matt to knuckle bump.

“Bye, Matt! Daddy and Mummy are taking me to thezoo, so we gotta go now,” Ian explained before running across the room to wherehis parents were.

Finn stood next to the door of the studio with onearm wrapped around his wife’s shoulders and used the other hand to push asidethe fabric of her unbuttoned flannel shirt to caress the well-concealed babybump through the black band tee that she wore underneath.

“Thank you again for having me on your showtoday, Matt, it was such a pleasure! I look forward to coming back again if I’minvited back and we can arrange it in our schedules!” Finn replied as he openedthe door of the studio and held open the door for his wife and son.

“Absolutely! Have fun at the zoo, Ian!” Mattcalled out to them from where he was sitting.

Rae gave Matt a wave and smile before reachingdown to offer her son a hand to hold as Finn and his family walked out of thestudio together.

THE END

A/N: Fun fact, some aspects of Finn/Rae’s child,Ian, were based on my 2 year old niece whom I love very dearly :)

These are the prompts I used, in case you missedthem during the story:

58) “I’m just a guy witha wife, two kids, and a Harley.”

76) “Daddy!”

68) “He’s four yearsold!”

[fangirl94stuff]

You’re My Daughter (Chris Motionless) (Motionless In White)

Requested via Wattpad

Word Count: 1,055

Y/N

You’d think being the kid of Chris Motionless would have been the best thing in the whole world, but you were kind of different to your dad and you knew he didn’t like certain elements of your life. You loved Dubstep music and moonlighted as a DJ, but you kept your gothic/emo roots which made you stand out when performing. You were also underage but had your trusty fake ID which fooled most people so you could DJ and no one was the wiser about your age.

It was easier to sneak out when your dad was constantly touring, but when he was home from tour it was a lot harder. Just last week he’d come across one of your fake ID’s and grounded you. But you had more than one ID and nothing was going to stop you from doing your passion. Tonight was a pretty big gig so you were sneaking out again.

Chris

I hated grounding y/n, but she was underage and had a fake ID. She didn’t know that I knew about her little DJ thing, but I hated that she kept breaking my rules. Without her fake ID, she wouldn’t be playing tonight. The rest of the band was over and I hadn’t told them my daughters secret yet.

“Oh my god it’s back on.”

I jump slightly as Ricky jumps up off the sofa.

“What’s on Ricky?”

“Don’t worry Chris it’s not your kind of music, it’s this amazing Goth DJ. The gig was cancelled but she just tweeted that it’s back on.”

I glance towards the stairs, y/n was up in her room sulking. The rest of the band was quite adamant about going. I excuse myself to go and check on my daughter only to discover that her bedroom was empty and her window was open. I was going to kill her when I got my hands on her.

~Club~

I left the guys at the house wanting to confront my rebellious daughter alone. The club was packed as I pushed my way to the front where y/n performed as her Goth alter ego. I didn’t like the music but had to admit that my daughter had talent and could get a crowd going.

y/n notices me and her eyes widen behind the coloured contacts she wore, she knew she was in some serious trouble.

“Sorry, I have to cut the set short guys. Keep on rocking through the night.”

The crowd boo her but quickly understand that she had to leave. y/n comes down from the booth and stands in front of me. I glare at her and point towards the exit, she walks ahead of me in silence.

The car ride back was silent. When I park she gets out and slams the door behind her, two things she got from me was her stubbornness and rage. I follow her into the house where the guys look up at her in shock.

“y/n, you’re the Goth DJ?”

“Surprise Uncle Ricky, but dads a buzz kill.”

y/n gives the guys a little bow in her entire costume before turning to glare at me.

“I’m not a buzz kill y/n. You’re underage and anything could happen to you at those clubs.”

y/n scoffs, “you tour ten months of the year dad and I get away with this every week. You leave me behind, Skyping once every couple of weeks and then it’s only for ten minutes. You don’t know anything about my life; you don’t even know your own daughter anymore.”

y/n’s words her like a slap in the face. I was meant to be the angry one but every word out of her mouth was the truth. I didn’t know my own daughter anymore. She was my flesh and blood yet she felt like a stranger around me, and as a dad that cut deep.

“Do you know why I do what I do dad? I DJ because it’s my passion and makes me happy. You tell your fans to do what makes them happy then shit all over what makes me happy. You hate my music choice but thousands of people support me. I can’t wait until I’m old enough to move out.”

Turning on her heels y/n runs up the stairs with tears in her eyes. I was gobsmacked; I never knew she felt that way about me. Yes, I disapproved of Dubstep music in general, but I really should be able to support my daughter.

Slumping on the sofa between Ricky and Ryan I put my head in my hands.

“She’s right, I’m an awful dad.”

“You’re not awful Chris, just stubborn and stuck in your own ways.”

Ryan pats my back; he was right about me being stuck in my own ways.

“y/n has some serious talent, Chris. She just wants her dad to love and support her.”

Ricky was right I needed to turn things around with my daughter before she hated me for the rest of her life.

Leaving the guys watching TV I head upstairs and knock on y/n’s door before entering. She’d removed the makeup, eye contacts and looked like my little girl again. She sniffles and moves over on her bed allowing me to lie next to her.

“Why can’t you see that this is my passion dad? I grew up watching you perform and making fans happy. I wanted to do the same thing.”

So my daughter looked up to me more than I knew; now I felt even worse.

“I guess my memories of you are still set in the past y/n when I toured less. I missed most of your teen years, but you’ll always be my little girl.”

y/n nods and crawls into my arms resting her head on my chest.

“I’ll always be your little girl dad I’ve just grown up. Do you hate me? I don’t want to stop making music.”

I stroke her hair and sigh.

“You can keep making your music but legally. Or you promise to let either me or one of your uncles escort you to future gigs. I just don’t want to see you get hurt y/n.”

“I love you, dad, sorry for yelling at you.”

y/n had nothing to apologise for. I hug my daughter, from now on I’d be in her life more.

[tune-collective]

Dubfire, Nicole Moudaber, Art Department & More Pay Tribute to The BPM Festival Following Ban

Dubfire, Nicole Moudaber, Art Department & More Pay Tribute to The BPM Festival Following Ban

Over the past ten years, The BPM Festival has cultivated a legacy of excellence among electronic music fans, attracting upwards of 70,000 people annually for its 10-day long festival in Playa del Carmen, Mexico.

Unfortunately, as of Monday morning, Jan. 16, it’s a legacy that will be forever marred by the mass shooting at Blue Parrot nightclub.

In the wake of the shooting, which left five dead and 15 wounded upon the final night of the festival, The BPM Festival has reportedly been banned from Playa del Carmen, along with all electronic music events of similar nature.

[readmore:7655437]

“At this moment, our general stance is not to allow BPM to perform here,” said Mayor of Solidaridad and President of the Business Coordinating Council of the Riviera Maya Cristina Torres Gómez in a press conference on Monday.

The decisive ruling would put an end to The BPM Festival’s 10-year run in Playa del Carmen, negating the festival’s historically peaceful relationship with the city. Not only would such a ban disrupt one of the largest annual tourist draws for the region, but it would effectively displace a bastion of global electronic music culture.

Of course, it’s possible The BPM Festival could find a new home in Mexico — last week, the event founders announced the festival’s expansion to Brazil and Portugal in 2017. Regardless, the loss of the festival’s home in Playa del Carmen — as inevitable as it now seems — serves as a blow to the global electronic music community.

Billboard Dance has reached out to some of the The BPM Festival’s most celebrated performers and industry figures to pay tribute to the beloved event.

Nicole Moudaber

“I’m deeply saddened and horrified by the tragic event that took place at blue parrot on the very last night of the festival. My night ran til 8am that Sunday morning at Blue Parrot – I can still feel the energy of that place. My heart goes out to the families and friends who lost their loved ones in the name of freedom, love, dance and compassion. But what is really disturbing here is the local council blaming the promoters of BPM for what happened. This is not fair, they are the ones who put Playa Del Carmen on the map, promoting tourism, boosting their economy. To blame them is like slapping the hand that fed you. They brought joy, culture, art and people from all over the world to celebrate life under one sound. It’s a shame and very sad.”

  Stacey Pullen

“The BPM Festival and the organizers are like family to me, one of the reasons why is because i was the first dj from Detroit to play at the Festival. I’ve been attending since the second year and seen it grow dramatically over the 10 year period in beautiful Playa Del Carmen with very minimal negative issues. Most importantly i have a personal relationship with all of them and that was the unique thing about this festival because most festivals are that you play the gig and you leave but that wasn’t the case here”.

  Erick Morillo

“It’s a shame that the actions of a few have put a negative ending to what has become, in the last 10 years, one of the most important festivals of the year due to the fact that it promotes underground music in a very beautiful setting.  Like the Winter Music conference and Ibiza, BPM is the stage in which it is imperative to have a presence and a place where artists have the ability to break records.  I hope it long lives as it is a crucial part of our industry.”

Dubfire

“By the time of the inaugural BPM event, I’d known Craig Pettigrew since the 90’s, having worked with him on various tours as Deep Dish around Canada. We became fast friends so when I got the pitch for BPM I was on board immediately. That first year it really felt like an intimate Canadian event; one in which we all were a part of to escape the brutally cold January winter. Throughout the years I proudly watched it blossom into one of the most revered and essential music events in the world; one in which I simply HAD to take part in every year. The memories I have are countless and very, very special. From epic nights to Blue Parrot and Kool Beach, special after parties that stretched into the afternoon, to the TechnoTacos pop ups I did with Richie Hawtin and more recently the opportunity to have brought the HYBRID show on a specially built stage at The Jungle.”

  Lee Burridge

“We were all shocked and saddened to hear the news coming out of Mexico this week. Our musical community has never been a place where violence rears it’s ugly head very often. Especially in such an extreme way. BPM festival has always been a place for us to celebrate life. To spend time with friends, make new friends, dance and escaping the cold of winter.

The festival themselves were celebrating their tenth year this year. Ten years of delivering a safe, well run, high quality destination dance music event. In those ten years they’ve supported a wonderful and diverse mix of DJs, live acts and well known event brands for us to experience. We went to clubs, beaches and even danced in the jungle. I know the organizers very well. They are kind souls. They work extremely hard each and every year to bring us a consistent and fun festival to attend. The actions of a lone individual shouldn’t be allowed to represent the example set year after year both by those who organize and those that attend a festival full of happiness and positivity.”

  Art Department

“I think it’s obviously a shame that this type of behaviour and mentality has ended a great run for an amazing music festival of course. But the more severe issue here is the presence of the cartels and their disregard for human life in certain areas of the world, particularly in Mexico. The fact that this happened at BPM is an issue of time and place and obviously has nothing to do with the music or “our community” as people like to put it. This isn’t an issue brought on by the arrival of a festival or techno and it’s completely foolish to use language that tie a massive tragedy like this to this culture, especially following a political issue like we just faced in the UK with the closure of Fabric Nightclub due to misplaced blame and responsibility. It’s so important to make that distinction right now while the world is watching.

Regardless of the efforts made by Playa officials to cast blame on the festival – the one factor that can be most easily and swiftly removed – in hopes of quickly restoring a feeling of security there, they’re fully aware that the fault here does not lay with festival organizers. And I know without a shadow of a doubt that regardless of the “ban” the organizers would not consider risking another life to hold the festival there again. BPM is still BPM and can easily relocate, and we will all be there to support and perform when it does.

It’s been a great ten years in PDC and I’m thankful to have been involved there from day one. I’m just very sorry that it has ended with a political finger pointed at the organization when the issue is still very much alive and well there with BPM over. Thoughts are with Kirk Wilson’s family and all of the other people who suffered a loss this week.”

[readmore:

Joris Voorn

“It’s unbelievable that during on the last day of it’s 10th anniversary, BPM comes to such a tragic end. Even though I’ve been at BPM only a few times, it felt like being at home amongst my peers and music lovers from around the globe. I am certain this won’t be the end, the people behind BPM will find a way to unite us again, at a different time and place. Our thoughts remain with the victims.”

  Nic Fanciulli

“I’ve had some amazing times at BPM over the years, and the owners are good friends of mine.  I think the first time i played was around 2010, so 7 years ago!  I’ve seen it grow from a small gathering of friends to a global powerhouse in the short space of 10 years.  Traditionally it was our version of Miami Music Week, where we could go and see all of our friends and listen to good music. My top three moments are probably; our Saved showcase in 2013 at Kool Beach (the first time we brought Carl Cox to BPM), La Familia at Blue Parrot in 2015 with Joris Voorn, and this year my We Are The Night party at Blue Parrot playing with Carl.  Hopefully they can come to an agreement with the government there and keep this festival alive; it’s always a shame to see the spirit of music affected like this”

  Gorgon City

“We’re extremely heartbroken at the events that took place on Jan. 15. We had just hosted our own party at Blue Parrot the week before, and have spent many nights in the club over the last few years, we always felt so safe there. We’re truly shocked by what happened. Our thoughts go out to the BPM security team and all those affected.”

Ben Turner (co-founder, International Music Summit)

“BPM has emerged as one of the leading celebrations of global electronic music culture in the annual calendar and, in its tenth year, had attracted interest from global media platforms and holidaymakers from all corners of the planet. It is probably the biggest winter celebration to mirror the summer season in Ibiza, and had recently replaced Winter Music Conference in Miami for the industry’s get-together in the darker months. BPM’s founders and curatorial team are music lovers who have contributed to global dance culture with a unique ten-day format albeit clearly with local challenges in a tough part of the world.”

  Jazz Spinder (agent, CAA)

“I am one of the lucky ones who have had the privilege of watching BPM grow into one of the most important events in the yearly festival calendar. This is a festival that is truly about the music. A place where artists go to see other artists play and end up combining sets or extending their own sets in a unique atmosphere. Not a place to get in and out of, but a place to stay for days at a time to catch up, let your guard down and and take in the magic from the beaches to the jungles.”

  Ed Hill (operations director, Be-At.TV)

“Our thoughts are with everyone affected by this senseless tragedy, particularly the families and loved ones of the deceased and injured. It’s incredibly sad that this should happen after an incredible 10 years of the BPM Festival. We have loved working with the BPM family over the last five years and are deeply saddened that a joyful and life-enhancing festival should be tarnished by violence. Absolutely nobody wins here.”

Source: Billboard

http://tunecollective.com/2017/02/01/dubfire-nicole-moudaber-art-department-more-pay-tribute-to-the-bpm-festival-following-ban/

[shkon]

Also my dream was crazy as fuck. I haven’t had a dream this vivid in a long time. (Story time now) btw also included a setting from another dream of mine that was also vivid. My dream world is taking shape and it’s based around my home town.. (really good read actually)

So I visited home from my new “home” in riverside and went to the mall to get myself a deli sandwich and a Thai tea. The perfect realm since the real mall would never have that, I mean deli sandwiches and Thai tea what a perfect combo. Anyways, I barely get my Thai tea when I run into a couple street kids I used to roll with back in the day and they’re headed out so I decided to walk with them. We reach the end of the parking lot and see my best friend aka brother ivan, who at this point of our lives have reached a lot of hostility between eachother and haven’t seen eachother in about 6 months. Instantly we hug it out like two lovers split from the fires of war.. I know homo AF We start talking and the fix gear biker gang kids get frustrated and say something along the lines of “hey dude I know you’re in town and feel special n shit, but we got some blunts to smoke at a gig downtown, you comin or nah?” Butthurt for having to split up with my boy for a night of “booze and bitches,” their words not mine, I made a last ditch effort to combine all my plans in one. I brought up an idea, “why don’t I throw a party and you can invite all your little homies and I can invite my Friends, we mix groups and have ourselves a rager.” Everyone loved the idea since they know I have good taste, I mean Thai tea and deli sandwiches? You go dreamworld me you’re awesome. Ivan brought up a good point, he said, “bro your in town for one night you don’t even live here? Where the fuck are you going to throw a party?” Scurrying through the inner dimensions of my noodle I inquired about a desolate land I had explored with my other best friend kurren in another dream world. (I didn’t invite him to the party lol) This place had abandoned buildings we could party at, watering holes, even a haunted sewage treatment plant rampant in wildlife just a quarter mile up the hill. Everyone gets really excited, except ivan since he always disagrees with me, which is why there was hostility between us in the first place. I stared at him waiting for his approval which I didn’t need anyway but would only lock in my positive emotions for the weekend further, “fuck it, let’s do it!”

Excitedly we all split up awaiting the night full of shenanigans, I stay with ivan and I get ready at his place. As I’m changing in his bathroom I look at my reflection and I see an old lady with an odd bejeweled grill and white Irises, she was oddly beautiful for her age and I understood that she was a witch or some sort of banshee, being the sicko that I am I instantly start masturbating… at first she smiled and liked it but then I felt this weird burst of energy and a cat latched on to my legs and meows really loud knocking back the tv the mirror and the table it was standing on. I get super freaked out and run into the kitchen where ivan and his cousin are hanging out barely cupping my towel around my nads. “Dude your fucking house is haunted as fuck! Bro there’s a fucking demon in the mirror what the fuuuck!” Ivan knowing his house was a little out of wack decided to investigate for himself, flipping the mirror where the demon is still grooming herself smiling all sexy.. “Yup that’s a demon alright.” She winks at us and I get another boner sending another burst of energy from the mirror lmaoo. “Think you’re pissing off her husband sicko,” ivan points to my odd boner which was in plain sight for all to see since the last burst of energy knocked my towel away (witch lady winks at us and scene fades away)

Ivan’s cousin Orlando and I wait around in Ivan’s living room staring at the pictures and figurines on the wall making new faces at us everytime we blink. I point it out to Orlando who’s extremely high at this point just staring blankly at the pictures and didn’t even notice the changes. I point it out to him and he smiles chillingly and says “ we need to get the fuck out of here pronto.. I don’t know how ivan lives like this.” (We hear one last burst of energy from The bathroom and the scene faded again to us driving to the party)

As we arrive I notice a buncha friends and mutuals parked in front of the abandoned pad obviously the dumbest move they could have made. “Obviously they remodeled the place it’s cool to park here” a stranger (Ricky) replied to my “yall retarded” face pointing at a charred memory of a child’s treehouse that now only carried the foundation and support beams. I guide everyone to a place to park and head inside setting up snacks booze and a generator for the dj to power the house with tunez. Scene fades in and out with a devilish montage of natural good human fun; people talking shots, strobe lights flicking us through each scene, two girls making out, shrooms and acid being administered in young street kids mouths, Flashbacks of the banshee winking at me. At this point I’m sitting pool side with one of the girls who was making out at the cliff end of a watering hole, music still playing in the background just close enough to hear it all and far enough to have a conversation. “Ya I actually ran into this place with my boy kurren a couple months back, the devil resides in the peak of that tower, it’s an extreme hike not meant for the faint of heart. Dark tunnels you end up crawling through covered in evil sludge sent from the man himself” super engaged and smiling at me she lays her head on my arm all cozy laying almost upright sideways on the end of the cliff, “once you get out through the top of the elevator shaft there’s a vegetated area lost to time where coyotes and deer roam, a bridge leads to the water tower and the quickest way down is to jump off the tower and into this watering hole” She was a good girl light red head from a good family straight A student,it was her first night out, the fixxy crew was renown for poisoning young girls and introducing them to a life of drugs and dirty dicks; I wasn’t exactly going to let them do that to this one, she was special. “Wait deer? You can’t be serious how’d they make it out to the heart of Chula Vista?” “I know I don’t get it either, but they’re there, I can show you” “No thanks, I’ll stay away from satan’s lair thank you..” I start making out with her with love flushing her eyes and joy and lust flushing mine, I really felt attached to this girl already like I found the girl of my dreams. I found an angel in the devils playground and my goulish properties had come out to play. I grab her tight and passionately throw ourselves off the cliff holding on to a vine with my other hand swinging making out like Tarzan and Jane. “Let me go! Are you fucking crazy” she says smiling completely wooed by my spurts of impromptu actions. I let her go as she asked and she lands almost perfectly in the middle of the watering hole smacking her ankle on the edge of the pool. “You get a girl to fall in love with you, and you fuck it up by breaking her fucking ankle.. you’re an idiot” says the girl my young love was making out with judgingly and jealously, she was sitting above us tripping out on shrooms dropping eaves on our conversation the entire time. (I dive in and the scene cuts out to me tending to her wounds) “It’s not broken it’s just bruised, Im sorry once again I thought it would be cute,” “Don’t worry it was, you’re just an idiot” she replies halfway crying the other half flirting. I offer her anything her soul desires; Ice, sugary treats, weed, ice cream, she smiles and says “caramel macchiato” “Wait what?” “Caramel macchiato!” She replies vigorously a trait I admire in a woman that I did not know she carried until she was halfway in a daze due to love and pain, physical pain. Before I could get up and cover my end of the bargain a street kid, hella strung out on shrooms and acid, his hair floating in the wind, dirt on his evil Filipino grin, bone skinny staring right at me, fires burning behind him stanced fist at his side, framed perfectly like right out of an anime; chuckles at me and says “it was fun” not knowing if he meant the party or burning down the house putting many lives in danger and exterminating the rager..

I kiss the girl on the lips as she passes out and run off into the house to warn people and save a couple lives, some dudes enthralled deeply in their game of Mario kart thinking the heat from the flames was planned drinking their Bottled IPA’s sours and stouts without removing their eyes fixated on the screen, I throw their old tv onto their wii and tellem “get the fuck out!!!!” Obviously pissed they leave still sipping their micro brews scurrying off into the thick smoke.

I make love to my sweetheart with the biggest campfire of the century burning in the back lesbian girl still sprawled out above us meditating and listening to us fuck, pressing on the good girl Renee’s bruise as she moans letting me do anything I decide to as she cums into a deep comatosas. We cuddle into the night and wake up to a police woman writing notes on a paper, “Ashkan? Honey you in some deep shit. Word is all this was your doing is that right?” At this point the girls father arrived and escorted her out wrapped up in a grey police blanket giving me dirty looks, Renee giving me worried I’ll remember this moment forever looks as they walked off into their Mercedes SUV. “Trespassing, arson, contributing to the delinquency of a minor, multiple minors I might add.. you’re lucky I like you. You should be going away for a long time but your friend ivan tells me you’re trying to make a life outside of daygo and I appreciate the youth stepping out and actually doing something, but don’t think you’re getting away Scott free oooo he’ll no. I’m glad you enjoyed being back home because you’re gunna spend another year here now” I walk with the police lady making futile efforts to explain the situation and try to find a way out of it then get stuffed in the backseat as I lock eyes with my mom who’s staring at me from beyond the caution tape. “Hope it was worth it, she seemed like a nice girl”