#sorry I don’t have much to say but yeah. online people are also thirsting over the wolf | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

sleepy-shutin · 2 years ago

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i feel like the tik tokification of CDDs has been so fucking bad and no one really wants to talk about it out of fear of fakeclaiming or whatever but like, i’ve seen a lot of people talk about how they literally can’t get into therapy for system related shit because their therapists doubt them because of how it’s such a trend right now. and because of it, all the “quirky” aspects of systems like switching on camera and full cosplaying your alters and doing little tik tok intros for all of them are so popularized but the actual disorder aspects are doubted or ignored or deemed “problematic”, like having genuine persecutors and not just edgy aesthetic alters who do black and white thirst traps on tik tok to sad boy rap or emo rock. and another thing i’ve noticed from this is people doubting RAMCOA as a whole, or telling survivors that they can’t talk about their trauma or vent because it’s too extreme or “unbelievable” (not a survivor myself but i’ve been reading about RAMCOA systems’ experiences with this). even besides that, system servers in general being inaccessible for a lot of survivors and systems who don’t want to use plural kit or have a system name or whatever. it’s just so! annoying! that i’m so scared to tell people about my disorder or talk about it publicly or even show symptoms of it, because i feel like people are inherently going to doubt me because of how it’s honest to god a trend. and i remember in early 2010s tumblr, it was a trend during that time too, but at least it was relatively contained to tumblr but tik tok is so far reaching. idk maybe i’m an asshole but i just wish people would take it seriously.

i don't think you're an asshole for this. i feel very similarly. i hate when people say "[disorder] isn't a trend!!" when it literally has actually become a trend among people on social media.

people say "DID isn't a trend", but what was that one tag that was trending for a few days straight on twitter? #systemsfordream?

if DID isn't a trend, then how is what's going on online it affecting real world people and their life experiences?

if DID isn't a trend, explain what the hell is going on on tiktok in general.

if DID isn't a trend, explain why all of these people are self diagnosing and armchair diagnosing their friends with DID based on extremely minimal reading and continuing to give genuine self-diagnosers an awful name, and doing anything they can to relate their symptoms to DID.

doubting RAMCOA-related experiences is not new, but yeah--systems that experienced RAMCOA have been shoved out of spaces for having trauma that's "too extreme" to vent about. i hate that shit so much, because people will see people with RAMCOA-related trauma venting about their experiences, and suddenly think these people are playing the trauma olympics when it's literally just their fucking life.

like, sorry some people are trafficking survivors while you survived medical neglect. them talking about their experiences and you feeling uncomfortable with that because it makes you feel like your trauma isn't as bad is not a them problem, it's a you problem, and you need to work through those feelings on your own time. believe it or not, from what i've seen, many survivors of RAMCOA-related abuse struggle with feeling like their trauma was 'enough' as well.

and yeah--tiktok has just. done so much damage to disorders like that. it's not just DID, but also ADHD and autism, both of which they've boiled down to "hyperfixation and special interest disorder", ESPECIALLY when they stomp on and speak over *permanently* non-speaking autistics, or autistics with higher support needs because of their autism, or autistics with cognitive impairments or comorbid learning/intellectual disabilities.

so many syscord servers just fucking suck, because they force you to use pluralkit or have a system name, force littles into one specific chat, etc, but like... bestie how are you going to know a lot of these things if i don't tell you that i've switched, lmao. the normalization of just instantly telling everyone you've switched or when something happens, or over-publicizing your system has and continues to do so much damage to people with DID that have trauma around sharing too much personal information about themselves online, or have had their profiles found by abusers, or similar traumas.

we use aliases online for just about everything *for those exact reasons*.

don't even get me started on the persecutors thing. i've heard more than a few stories about black people with persecutor alters that internally appear white and are racist, but that's "problematic" so people don't like it. i've heard more than a few stories about people with alters that internally reenact abuse in some form, such as an introject of an abusive father that hurts the littles/child parts, but that's "problematic" so people don't like it. i've heard more than a few stories about persecutor alters that try to commit suicide when they front, but that's "problematic" so people don't like it.

the worst part is that these alters aren't given any kind of nuance because they're not treating or understanding them as parts of a whole dissociated consciousness, but rather entirely separate people who are, on their own, wholly responsible for their own actions. people won't look into why a person would have a racist alter, or an alter that reenacts abuse internally, or alters that try to commit suicide, they don't give these alters the benefit of the doubt or think that they might be hurting as well, they just shit on these alters with no reprieve, even when the system is trying to tell them not to do that.

and like, i understand being avoidant towards persecutors and being mean to them because they're reminders of trauma and they're not pretty about it, because they can be scary to see and deal with. but in the end they're just as traumatized as you are, and are dealing with it in unhealthy and destructive ways, and they deserve help, not to be shunned or further abused. even ignoring the fact that that kind of behavior will only make theirs worse, that's really no way to treat a part of yourself who is traumatized and struggling.

i'm just so tired of tiktok and the tiktokification of my disorders, and i'm tired of people acting like it's not happening.

#ask #anon #part zero

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wiener-soldiers · 4 years ago

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how to (not) be internet famous - peter parker

summary: peter parker becomes internet famous overnight and doesn’t exactly know how to deal with it, which causes him to end up in a precarious situation.

words: 4k

warnings: rien, mes amis!

a/n: part of the unsolved mini-series! just wanted to write a lil blurb w some world building before i go into more ghost/ghoul hunting. also goes without saying that this is minimally edited, sorry lol

unsolved masterlist | masterlist | add yourself to the taglist! | faq

Peter Parker did not intend on becoming famous.

It was quite literally an accident—a byproduct of being in the right place in the right time. But, completely out of his control, Peter Parker helped solved an Unsolved mystery.

It was one of Buzzfeed Unsolved’s most viewed episodes; the story of Peter Quill, a little boy who went missing right after his mother died. Of course, one theory was that he was abducted by aliens. That was the joke theory.

Until Peter Parker and Y/N Stark proved that theory to be correct.

Being fans of the show, the duo was vaguely aware of the existence of Peter Quill, the mysterious boy who went missing. It wasn’t until Thor traveled back to Earth with the rest of the Guardians did Peter and Y/N recognize Peter Quill.

Of course, their first instinct was to interview him about how he got abducted and ask about some space stories. Their next instinct was to invite Ryan and Shane of the Unsolved Network to interview him as well.

This subsequently made the internet blow up. And Peter Parker became famous because of it.

The video titled “We Solved A Buzzfeed Unsolved Case” garnered millions of views overnight, with thousands of comments flooding the video. Peter’s Twitter went from less than a hundred followers to more than a hundred thousand overnight, and his Instagram blew up in a similar fashion.

He was used to Spider-Man being famous, but Peter Parker had never gotten that much attention before. It was surreal.

He found himself sitting on the brown leather couch at the Avengers Tower (where the Stark family alose happened to reside) the morning after the video was released, staring at his texts blow up in front of him.

Ned: Dude you’re famous?? You’re on the YT trending page!!

MJ: can i meet ryan and shane? also warning: flash and brad don’t know you’re dating y/n so their texts may be a little hostile…

Flash: Damn Parker, how do you know Y/N Stark???

Brad: Why haven’t you brought Y/N around?

Betty: Peter you HAVE to let me interview you for the school news! When are you free??

“What the hell is going on…” Peter whispers, jaw unhinged as notification after notification caused his phone to ‘ding’ out of control.

“Hey Pete,” he hears a voice flow into the living room. His girlfriend walks past him, not before pressing her lips to his cheek. His cheek warms at the contact and his eyes follow her pajama-clad body into the large kitchen.

“Did you see the video you posted?” Peter calls after her. Y/N shakes her head as she throws a banana along with other frozen fruit into the blender.

“No…why?” she calls back. “Do you want a smoothie?”

“No, but thank you,” Peter replies quickly. He turns his body to face her and raises his voice at the sound of the blender turning on, “It’s trending. Like, everywhere.”

“I figured it would,” Y/N calls back, the hum of the blender drowning her voice out.

“How are you so chill?” Peter asks her, slightly bewildered.

“There was paparazzi in the hospital waiting room when I was bored. You get used to stuff like that,” she answers, before making her way back to Peter, smoothie in hand. She positions herself on the couch, placing her legs overtop Peter’s lap.

He places his arms over her shins instinctively. “I’m definitely not used to stuff like that,” he mumbles, still scrolling through his notifications.

Y/N scoffs, “You’re Spider-Man, honey. That comes with press.”

“Spider-Man is famous, not me,” he counters.

The sound of the elevator opening and deep voices conversing cut the couple off as they turn towards the door. Tony, followed by Steve, Bucky, and Natasha file into the common floor, all deep in conversation. They don’t seem to notice the young couple, so Y/N decides to make them known.

“Morning!” Y/N calls out.

Tony’s head snaps up towards his daughter, before shifting and narrowing his eyes at Peter. “We were just talking about you,” he says, walking towards the two.

“Oh?” the younger Stark challenges.

Natasha lets out a soft laugh before patting Peter on the shoulder. “You need a public relations lesson,” she says to Peter.

“A what?”

Y/N lets out a fit of giggles. “It’s to make sure you don’t say something stupid to a large audience,” she tells him, and Peter scrunches his nose.

“Why would I need a…oh.”

Tony smirks at him before showing him his ever-rising Twitter followers. “Yeah, oh. That video you posted basically broke the internet. Even old man Steve is talking about it.”

Steve rolls his eyes but smiles sympathetically at him before handing him a grey folder. “Protecting Spider-Man’s identity is still your number one priority, right?” Steve asks and Peter nods. “So, we need to make sure you don’t say anything stupid or post something that gives away who your alias is.”

“So, what’s in the folder?” Peter asks the adults in the room.

“Homework,” Natasha answers. “I’ll help make sure that your identity stays a secret, but I need you to make sure you read that document very carefully. They’re full of general best-practices and protocol for if your identity is exposed.”

“Got it,” Peter whispers, mostly to himself.

“Great,” Tony says with a pat to his shoulder. “It was a funny video, by the way. Can’t wait to see what you kids come up with.”

Over the weekend, even though Natasha, Tony, and Y/N prepared him as best they could for the storm that would most likely ensue on Monday at school, Peter still didn’t feel prepared.

He stood in the middle of his room, gnawing at his lip and choosing between the dark blue sweater and the maroon sweater. Granted, the sweater wouldn’t make that much of a difference and hide the fact that Peter was still a big nerd, but he had a feeling he needed to make a good impression today.

“Babe, you are overthinking it,” Y/N mumbles from Peter’s bed. Like most weekends, she spent the night at Peter’s place. Although things do tend to get a little heated, most nights the couple just watch movies, play video games, or take a walk around the block.

“You’re not the one going to a public school,” Peter mumbles back. It was true; Tony had tried sending Y/N to Midtown, but the paparazzi was getting unbearable, so she took online classes instead. Y/N didn’t mind missing out on the high school experience—her life was so surreal that nothing could make her feel normal, except Peter or Morgan.

“That wasn’t what I meant,” Y/N groans and rolls out of bed. She shivers at the cool breeze caused by the AC being blasted on high as she wraps Peter’s flannel around her body even tighter. “I meant that you’ll look really good in whatever you wear, honey.”

Peter rolls his eyes but turns to face his girlfriend, dark blue and maroon sweater still in hand. “I don’t know why I’m so nervous,” he admits.

“Afraid everyone will look at you differently?”

“Afraid everyone will think I don’t deserve someone like you…”

Y/N gives him a soft smile before closing the gap between them. She peppers kisses along his shoulder, his neck, then finally his lips. Peter ducks down to look at her, wrapping his arms underneath the flannel she’s wearing and around her waist.

“I love you, ya know that right?” she whispers into his collarbone.

Peter hums in response.

“And the world doesn’t get to decide who or what you deserve. Because you deserve a hell of a lot more than what I can give you.”

Peter groans, “Don’t say that. You give me everything I need.”

“And that’s what matters,” Y/N replies. “Not what anyone else thinks. Okay?”

Peter pulls away and gives his girlfriend a sincere smile, “Okay.”

“Good,” she muses before pressing a final kiss to Peter’s lips. She then takes the maroon sweater from his hands. “Wear the dark blue sweater, I want to wear the maroon one.”

---

Despite Y/N’s encouraging words, Peter’s still nervous.

He’s nerves kick in as soon as Y/N has to leave his place while he packs his school bag. He’s nervous on the subway on the way to school. He’s nervous as he crosses the street towards campus. He’s nervous when he’s walking toward the school entrance, so much so that he can hear his heartbeat over the podcast he’s listening to. And he’s especially nervous when people openly gawk and stare at him as he makes his way to his locker.

Luckily, MJ and Ned are there to save him.

“They’re all staring,” MJ comments as Peter yanks his locker open and reaches for his calculus textbook.

Peter laughs nervously, “I’m aware.”

“You know that clique of really hot sophomores who won’t shut up at lunch?” Ned adds on as he stares at his phone, “They’re all thirsting over you on Instagram.”

Peter slams his locker shut in surprise, “Wh-what?”

Sure enough, Ned’s phone is filled with screenshots of the video on Allison’s Instagram story with the caption ‘hmu peter ;) or i may have to fake needing a tutor to talk to you.’

Peter gags. MJ snickers.

“Oh my god, this is awful,” Peter shudders as he turns around and makes his way to first-period calculus. Ned and MJ follow suite. “Don’t they know I’m dating someone?”

“Peter, if we barely knew you were dating someone until we met her and started handing out with her,” MJ deadpans.

“Speaking of your girlfriend,” Ned butts in, “are you going to tell her about Allison?”

“No, she’d probably laugh. And it’s not a big deal, right?” Peter answer honestly, smiling slightly at the thought of Y/N laughing her ass off at the thought of sophomores at his own school acting thirsty on main.

Ned stops dead in his tracks, “What if she was actually talking to you?”

“Ned, what—”

“Hi, Peter!” a high-pitched voice attempting to sound sultry cuts him off.

MJ laughs in amusement before walking away as Peter squeaks out, “H-hi, Allison.”

Ned pats his shoulder encouragingly before walking away, giving Peter a ‘you’re on your own’ look.

She bats her eyelashes at him, giving him a shy smile. Peter’s distracted by her bright pink outfit—she looked straight out of an early-2000s movie. It suited her, but it wasn’t really Peter’s preference.

“I watched your video, it was really funny,” Allison says, inching closer to Peter.

“Thanks, um look, I gotta go—”

“You doing anything tonight?” she immediately asks.

No, Peter thinks, but he racks his brain for an excuse. May is working so he can’t use her, Tony is at the Avengers’ Compound, MJ has art class, Ned is working on a group project, maybe Y/N…

It’s too late. “Great!” Allison quips, “I’m having a party tonight and you’re invited, hottie. I’ll AirDrop you the details.”

“Uh, thanks,” he mutters pathetically as she practically skips away.

It wasn’t just Allison’s invitation that stuck out to him; it seemed like everybody more popular than Peter was giving him some sort of attention. If Peter didn’t know better, we would’ve been flattered. Instead, he was suspicious.

By lunch, Peter had been invited to three parties, a football game, a boat ride, and more invitations to hangout than he could count. Even Mr. Harrington made a jab at Peter’s internet fame.

As soon as the bell rang, Peter bolted out of his English class and ran out the front gates to take a breath. Even as Spider-Man, public events often felt overwhelming. Now, with no excuse to leave and no disguise to hide his flustered expression, the few minutes of silence he had at beginning of lunch was the only break he got all day.

“You don’t look too hot, babe,” he hears a voice say. From his spot leaning against the railing of the school entrance, he lifts his gaze and finds Y/N Stark staring up at him from the bottom of the stairs.

He stands up immediately and meets Y/N halfway down the stairs. He smiles widens as he gets close to her, “What are you doing here?”

“MJ texted me—said you were feeling overwhelmed,” she says nonchalantly, but concern laces her features. “You doing okay?”

“Just not used to so many people giving Peter Parker attention. And the feeling that they probably just want to hang out with me because they want to be famous makes me icky.”

Y/N hums and reaches for his torso to give him a hug. Peter is on the step above her, so he wraps his arms around her shoulders and rests his chin on her head. “I know how you feel,” she mumbles.

Peter laughs half-heartedly, “Got invited to a shit ton of parties, though.”

Y/N chuckles into his chest, “Oh really?”

“One of which is tonight. Got any plans?”

“Hmm…maybe,” she tells him. “Dad wants me to be his plus one to a gala thing, but I don’t really want to go.”

“You’d rather go to a shitty high school party?”

“I’d rather do anything, honestly.”

A honk from a car parked on the curb catches their attention. Peter looks up and finds Happy peering his head through the window of a black sedan. “Hate to break you two up, but I really don’t want to be swarmed by high schoolers,” Happy shouts, “so we should get going, Y/N.”

Y/N sighs, “And, that’s my cue.”

“I’ll see you tonight, maybe?” Peter asks hopefully, pressing a kiss on her forehead.

“Maybe. Text me the address, but don’t bail on the party,” Y/N tells him before giving Peter a proper kiss. Another honk from Happy causes them to break away, followed by the school doors opening and more and more people filtering outside. A series of shocked gasps at Y/N Stark and Peter Parker in such a compromising position prompt Y/N to start walking down the stairs.

“See you, Peter,” Y/N shouts as she quickly makes her way down the steps.

Peter waves to Y/N in the passenger seat as her and Happy drive away. His phone the buzzes with a text from Y/N:

Y/N 🥰: hang in there bb, love you!

“Yo, dickwad!” Peter hears Flash shout from behind him, “Why didn’t you introduce me to your Stark friend?”

Peter sighs. This was going to be a long day.

---

“You don’t have to go if you don’t want to.”

“I want to May…it’s just that—”

“It’s just that you want Y/N there?”

Peter sighs and shakes his head. He sits in the passenger seat of May’s car as she’s parked outside Allison’s house where the party is taking place. He’s beyond uncomfortable: the girl who was shamelessly flirting with him was sending him DMs, asking him when he was going to show up to her party. His skinny jeans—the nice ones saved for special occasions—were still a little stiff because he never really wore them, and he’s sure he’s made sweat stains on his white t-shirt.

“I guess, I just want the high school experience, to feel normal. Even if it’s a fake normal,” Peter says honestly, fiddling with his hair in the mirror. “But everything is easier with Y/N around.”

“Did she answer your texts?”

“I sent her the address and she said she would try to find an excuse to leave the gala early, but I don’t know if she’s gonna make it,” Peter says dejectedly.

May nods understandingly, “If you want to leave, just send me an SOS. I’ll come pick you up.”

“Thanks, May,” he says before pressing a kiss to her cheek. He doesn’t feel his body move, but his feet carry him out of the car and towards the front steps of the house. He doesn’t realize he’s reached for the door until he’s already inside, looking around at the darkened house illuminated by colourful lights and blaring with music.

“Peter!” he hears someone call from the top of the stairs. It’s Allison, clad in a sheer top, lacy bralette, and tight leather pants. He tries not to gawk at her, but he gulps in nervousness as she approaches.

“You made it!” she exclaims over the rumbling bass. Without warning she pulls Peter into a hug, pressing her body close to his. His muscles tense in surprise, but he feels Allison shiver.

Fucking great, Peter thinks as Allison eyes him up and down, biting her lip.

“Do you want a drink?” Allison says, latching onto his bicep and guiding him further into the house.

“Um, sure,” Peter says as he tries to remove his arm from her grasp while still remaining subtle. He fails, and Allison proceeds to run her nails up and down his arm.

Someone shoves a solo cup in Peter’s hand, and he takes a few big gulps immediately. His powers can’t get drunk, but he can sure as hell try if he has to handle Allison’s not-so-subtle advances towards him all night.

“I’m glad you came,” Allison suddenly whispers in his ear before biting his ear lobe in an attempt at seduction.

Peter whips his head around to confront her but before he can say anything, she’s left him to chat with her friends who have been watching the whole interaction in jealousy and awe. Great, Peter thinks before wiping his earlobe clean of her spit.

The party isn’t too bad; a few games of beer pong are going on the patio and people are taking turns jumping into the pool in just their underwear. Peter makes small talk with some people he recognizes, but for the most part, he leans against the wall and watches Flash pretend to be good at beer pong. Every few minutes, he checks the time on his phone and hopes for a text.

At 9:15, Peter has been at the party for forty-five minutes and is on his third drink. He still doesn’t feel buzzed.

At 9:24, Allison checks up on him again and tries to get him to strip with her and jump into the pool. He declines.

At 9:32, Flash loses his third game of beer pong in a row and a heard of angry freshmen finally scare him away from the table.

At 9:47, he hears excited commotion inside the house. He doesn’t bother to look inside and instead stares at the amber liquid in his cup.

He feels a hand fall on his shoulder, and he groans, finally fed up with Allison’s antics. “Look Allison, I think you’re sweet and all but—”

“Who’s Allison?”

Peter’s face breaks into a huge smile at the sight of Y/N Stark, still in her formal evening wear. The dark green, straight gown falls to the floor and the simple dress is bedazzled by nothing except the gold necklace Peter got her for her birthday and the million-dollar Stark smile.

“You made it,” he says in relief and excitement.

Y/N smirks back, “I’m overdressed.”

“You look beautiful.”

Y/N examines Peter’s outfit, “You look good too. This shirt makes your arms look huge.”

Peter blushes but takes a hold of her hands, only half-aware that half of the party is probably staring at them right now. “I didn’t think you were going to make it.”

Y/N laughs, “We were stuck in traffic. Dad wanted to get out of there too, it was pretty boring. We had to drop him off at home, first.”

“You left a boring party to come to another boring party, then. The difference is that you don’t get free dinner over here.”

Her laugh draws more attention to the duo and Peter finally finds the balls to look at the decent-sized crowd accumulating around them. He then notices a familiar face push through the people.

“Oh my god, you’re Y/N Stark!” Allison gushes as she approaches her, “Can I get a picture with you?”

Y/N smiles at her, “Um, sure?”

Allison squeals and shoves her phone into someone’s face, demanding them to take her picture. After a few photos are taken, Allison grabs her arms giddily and says, “You should totally follow me on Insta, these pics turned out really cute.”

Y/N looks amusedly at her, “Yeah, for sure…”

Allison then gasps, “You know Peter, too! We go to school together.” Allison then wraps her arms around Peter’s bicep and Y/N and Peter lock eye contact; Peter looks at Y/N in a state of panic and Y/N looks at Peter with nothing but amusement.

“Yeah, I figured,” she tells her, the amused expression growing.

Allison gasps again, “Peter! We should get a picture together too!”

Before he can really process it, Allison is pulling Peter close and shoving her phone in front of their faces. As Allison makes several different selfie faces, Y/N laughs softly as Peter smiles awkwardly at the camera. Suddenly, the feeling of lip-glossed lips touches his cheek and Peter raises his eyebrows in surprise and watches as Allison presses a kiss to his cheek in front of his girlfriend and what seemed like half the party. Her kisses trail down his neck, jaw, and ear before Peter finally gets over his initial shock and laughs awkwardly.

“Okay, um. That was kinda weird, Allison. You see, I’m ac—”

Allison juts her lip out and pouts, “But these were turning out so cute, Petey!”

Y/N Stark finally breaks out into a fit of hysterical laughter and both Peter and Allison turn to her with a bewildered expression.

“What?” Allison asks accusingly, thinking that she’s being mocked.

“Honey, he’s not interested.”

Allison’s jaw unhinges, “And how would you know?”

“Sweetheart, you’d be embarrassed if I told you.”

She scoffs. “Try me.”

“I’m dating Peter.”

Allison’s eyes bulge. The group of people watching the interaction gasp. Peter chokes on his own spit.

Allison’s face suddenly gets very, very red. “Miss Stark, I’m so, so sorry—"

Y/N holds out a hand to stop her rambling. “Don’t worry about it, love. If I wasn’t already dating him, I would be all over him, too,” she quips before grabbing Peter’s hand and leading him out of the party.

“E-erm, bye! Thanks for inviting me,” Peter calls back as Y/N leads him out of the house and towards the black sedan where the driver was waiting for the two to be done partying.

“All things considered, I would call that a pretty tame first fan interaction,” Y/N tells him as they walk towards the car. Her arm is wrapped around his torso as she leans her cheek on Peter’s shoulder.

Peter’s arm slings around her shoulders and looks down at her face. Her eyes twinkle in the moonlight and her features are light with amusement. “You’re not mad?” he asks her.

“Why would I be mad?”

“Because another girl was kissing me in front of you. And that you had to out our relationship.”

“Not a valid reason to be mad, to be honest. She didn’t know, and our relationship was bound to get out anyway.”

Peter laughs lightly, “You’re amazing, you know that?”

Y/N hums, “Yeah, I know. But so are you. And don’t worry, after a few weeks, the whole school will be a little chiller about your internet fame.”

A week later, Y/N and Peter uploaded a video where they went ghost hunting with Sam Wilson and Bucky Barnes and it broke the internet yet again. Needless to say, the whole school was not very chill about it.

#peter parker imagine #peter parker x reader #tom holland imagine #tom holland x reader #peter parker #tom holland #unsolved #bf unsolved #wiener soldiers

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mel-street · 4 years ago

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hi guys! happy new year and here’s hoping that 2021 is a better year for all of us. during quarantine i did what a lot of you guys did and turned to social media sites and fanfiction. (the amount of fanfiction i’ve read this year is INSANE and we’re not going to talk about it)

my usually nerdy self immersed myself into fandoms and along the way i met some of the most important people in my life now. these people have taken me in, broken me (im dramatic kay deal with it), and been there to huggle me when i cried over random shit. so this is for you guys. these are for all the internet weirdos that my teachers and parents warned me about, but that i ended up being closer to than some of my irl friends. these are for the people who have influenced me and shaped me into the weird fangirl stabby bad boi simp that i am starting into 2021 (im aware that this entire thing makes no sense but just pretend that it does)

@ohh-deary-me RAVEN (ok that was weird to call you, but im not going to name reveal you for a third time so yee) aksdjflkdsjfd i love you way to much. we first met on a pintrest group chat for some project thingy on wattpad and ended up fighting over tom holland which says something about both of us. you’re so incredibly amazing and im so proud of us for how much we’ve grown and you’re amazing, and a literal copy of me which is scary, but you’re so amazing and beautiful and i love you so fucking much and i’ll never leave you <3

@wildfleur-dreams DOT! you’re my huggable smol bean sister whom i love with all my heart and one day i will meet you and i will hug you and pat you on your smol head even though we’re pretty much the same height oop-. you’ve been there for me ever since i told you to read my my shitty grishaverse fanfiction and commented on it. and i love you so so so much *huggles* <33

@asterani sdfjasf raffe. you’re literally the sweetest human bean in the world. i love talking to you about random shit and thirsting over disney characters. asdkfjsd you’re so amazing and i hope you know that *Huggles* also hehe im glad you like the mandalorian. we need to fangirl together sometime. i love youu.

@doublerainbowsss NOMI!! my bts obsessed older sister by like 6 days. you’re so incredibly talented and funny and amazing and sometimes im immensely concerned for your mental health but that’s only because i love you lmao :) thank you for always being there for me and thank you for making my little sister into a bts stan *serene smile* im not mad about that at all- ily hon

@brekkerstan *waves* hiiii. i love how we bonded over some completely random grishaverse post and then ended up writing some completely crack headcannons. you’re so sweet and im so glad that you messaged me a few months ago. thank you for always being there for me and always fangirling about six of crows with me (except there’s like a huge time difference between us and you’re always messaging me at like 2 in the morning and you need to SLEEP) <33

@sincerely-milli MILLI BBY. i knew you for a while on wattpad, but it wasn’t until we both got tumblrs and both got way to obsessed with vlv that we became close. you're the most amazing beautiful talented human to ever exist and i love freaking out about mechfall with you. ily <3

@nostalgiconism IKKKA. i’ve known you for a while on wp, but i just wanted to tell you that im so grateful for you. you were one of the first people i ever followed and one of my first online friends and you’re literally so sweet and idk what i’d do without you. ily

@illavarasi KIRI!! ok imma be honest i was completely intimidated by you when i first met you, but now i know you as an amazing chaotic bean/clown/hooman and i love you for that. thanks for always being there and always making me laugh. ily

@lochscinders hey cece. im sorry you had to put up with my dramatic ass for so long. thanks for ruining every single disney movie for me in one night while we both wheezed hysterically. that was possibly the most iconic and scarring moments of 2020. thanks for putting up with me thirsting over stabby bad bois and my endless spamming of anakin gifs. love ya <3

@mintyvolt ok this is the most talented human in the world. like seriously volt i don’t understand how you manage to juggle school and other stuff while writing and posting incredible vlv chapters every week. because of you i’ve cried over a certain golden boi’s death, shipped my murder beans to an uncomfortable extent and fallen in love with a murder. (i swear im still writing that melfall fanfic i just happened to forget about it) thanks for being so amazing and creating vlv. you’re going to be famous one day and then i’ll be able to brag that i knew you then. ily

@rosy-drxxmer KIRI. im so glad you’re reading soc lmao. i’ve known you for a while, but thank you for always being there for me and continuously spamming me with six of crows memes and edits. i love freaking out and fangirling over kanej and the grishaverse here’s to another year of fangirling. ily kay? you’re amazing and beautiful and talented and deserve the world.

@sitaarein hi isha yeah idk which blog you use anymore but imma just tag this one. you were friends with some of my closest friends a while ago and then you left wp for a while and i didn’t know what happened to you. we all moved to tumblr and i found you and im so happy we started talking. you’re so amazingly talented and have somehow managed to teach me how to use photopea (which btw is pronounced photo-pe-a) so thanks for that. keep being amazing <3

and lastly @YOU if you’re reading this

thank you to all my followers who followed me for some random fandom and then had to put up with me spamming you with something completely different from what you followed me for. i really appreciate all of you *hugs* i hope your 2021 is amazing.

aksjfksd i l love all of you guys so much. HAPPY NEW YEAR I HOPE YOU HAVE A GOOD YEAR (or at least a year better than this one)

#ok i just KNOW that i forgot someone #so if you're a close mutual that i've messawged before that i didn't add than im so sorry and ily

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purplesurveys · 4 years ago

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1024

What would you say is your favorite food? Sushi. < Ahhh, this is a good one. My favorite is down to a tie: it’s either chicken curry or burgers.

What color eyes does the person you like / love have? Are they pretty? Dark brown. I’m not too sure what the second question is referring to but yeah, she and her eyes are both pretty.

What was the first television show you were obsessed with? Hi-5, omg. That show was my life in preschool and I always watched the 12 NN replay as soon as I got back home from school, back when I was still on a half-day sched. I was so hooked I remember having legit tantrums before starting Grade 1 because grade school meant full days in school and thus having to miss out on the show entirely.

Do you like Mexican food or any other foreign foods? For sure. All my favorites are Asian (Indian, Japanese, Indonesian, Chinese, etc.) but I also enjoy Italian, Mexican, Greek etc cuisines. I generally haven’t tried African cuisines but I really, really want to.

What color is the keyboard you are currently using? The keys are black with white lettering.

Do you own any of those ‘chunky’ and cute rings? Nope, not my style.

What are you planning on eating for dinner tonight if you haven’t already? I saw my dad cooking up something deep-fried; it was like his own version of katsu or something, or maybe it’s fish fillet? I’m not too sure what it is yet but I’m excited and will probably eat lots of it as I skipped all my meals and have only been running on coffee and vape all day - not good.

Do you own an iPod or MP3 player? If so, when did you get it? Technically I still do. Haven’t used it since high school. I got it when I was 10 back in ‘08; I was envious of the kids in school who had iPods, so I asked my dad to buy me one even though I wasn’t super into music at the time. Not the best kid in the world.

When was the last time someone took your picture? Last Saturday when my package came. Apparently online deliveries now require your photo to be taken upon receiving your package and I think it’s for the seller to keep track of their transactions. I’m not a big fan of the new procedure, but it’s whatevs.

Would you rather write a report or type it on a computer? Type.

What color was the last jacket or hoodie you wore? Gray.

Do you receive more compliments or insults on a daily basis? Neither, really. I haven’t been talking to people a lot; and when I do it’s for work, where I receive neither compliments nor insults.

Who is the lead actress / actor from your absolute favorite movie? Audrey Hepburn and Albert Finney, or Matt Damon and Ben Affleck.

Can you recite the alphabet backward? [continued from last night] Slowly, but I’m sure I can finish it.

Do you eat chili when you get a hotdog, or do you like it plain? We don’t do hotdogs with chili here. I generally don’t see chili much where I live and I wouldn’t call it a common dish.

Would you say it’s easy for people to make you smile or laugh? At first I thought it was, but I’m slowly realizing that it isn’t.

What would you say is your favorite cereal, if you even like it? Cookie Crisp is the only one I like. I don’t have cereal often.

When was the last time you went on vacation? Where was it? It was a quick weekend getaway to Tagaytay and then Cavite, if it counts.

How many states have you been to in your lifetime? Zero.

Do you and your friends normally say you love one another? Yep, especially with Andi and Angela.

Have you ever been an outcast at your school or anywhere else? I was definitely one in early grade school, and again in Grade 6 when both my closest friends migrated in a span of six months, and I spent nearly all my lunch periods alone. Looking back on it, I’m really glad I powered through and made it here because I truly wasn’t happy at the time.

Do you own any dresses? If so, what colors are they? I have lots of sundresses and little black dresses because I was into those for a very long time at one point. Some of them are black, obviously, but I also have dresses in blue, maroon, and olive.

Would you say you drink more pop / soda than you should? I never drink soda as I’ve always felt like I spend more time complaining about how drinking it feels like burning my tongue and throat than actually enjoying it.

Would you rather have orange juice or milk with your breakfast? Water.

How many different colors has your bedroom been painted? Just one. The walls have been white ever since we moved here 12 years ago.

Do you cuss? If so, do you ever cuss in front of your parents? I’ll slip in front of them sometimes but I never get in trouble for it anymore.

Would you ever tell your mom about the things you’ve done sexually? Our humor together can be raunchy sometimes but I don’t think I’d ever do this. I dunno if she wants to hear I’ve had sex with a girl either.

Is there anyone out there who can make you cry very easily? Yes.

What was the worst news you’ve heard this entire week? *In the last week, hearing about the typhoon’s effects in other cities didn’t feel good. This entire country is literally only getting by with donations from the private sector because the government isn’t doing shit for cities and families who got severely affected by the typhoon; it’s almost depressing to hear and read about.

Have you ever been in a car wreck? I’ve been in minor car accidents but it would be too much to call any of them car wrecks. They had all just been tiny bumps or thuds.

Do you have your ears pierced? If not, what do you have pierced? Yes, my mom had my earlobes pierced when I was an infant. I don’t plan on getting any more new ones as I’m not really into piercings.

Has anyone ever told you that they think you have ADHD? Nope.

What is your biggest pet peeve? When people reach out first via text/IM then even if I get back to them in 5–10 seconds, it takes them a long time to get back to me. It’s especially annoying if they classify it as urgent, I drop everything to reply quickly, then they end up disappearing. Like why?

Do a lot of people understand you completely? Who does exactly? No, I like keeping a wall up.

Would you say you’re really good at cooking and baking things? Haha no. But it’s something I want to be skilled in, definitely. I’d love to be able to make the food I usually just thirst over on the internet. I’m taking baby steps, like figuring out how to make certain sandwiches, but I have a long way to go before I can consider myself any good.

How is the weather outside right this second? It’s been a little cloudy this morning but it might start to get fair seeing how I’m beginning to see the sky turn blue. I’m just hoping there won’t be too much sun, period.

Do you have a lot of trees around your house? What about buildings? No buildings as I live in a gated village. We have a number of trees around, but I wouldn’t call it ‘a lot.’

Would you say either one of your parents are 'pack-rats?’ No. I have that title, and I believe I inherited it from my great-grandmother who was a bit of a pack rat herself, as I’ve been told.

Have you ever disowned anyone in your family? For what reasons? Kinda. I don’t associate with one of my uncles because he has a terrible drinking issue that he never got to permanently fix. Whenever I see him at family gatherings he just smells like stale gin or whatever it is he drinks, and it just ruins the essence of family reunions for me. As recent as Christmas Day last year he drove drunk and crashed into a car with an entire family, but as always his ass got lucky because 1) no one in the family got hurt, and 2) said family let go of the lawsuit they were planning to file against him.

Have you ever seen That 70’s Show? Do you watch it regularly? I tried watching the first episode but genuinely could not find it entertaining for the life of me. Sorry, Mila :(

If you could choose, what decade would you rather live in? I never really think about revisiting decades - they’re already behind, so what’s the point? As bad as the 2020s have been looking, I’m okay with staying here.

How often would you say you get sick? Once a year at most.

Is there anyone out there who has hurt you so much, you wish they’d die? I used to wish they would die, but I don’t feel that way anymore.

Has anyone ever called you a socio-path before? I don’t think so.

When was the last time you watched a movie in theaters? December.

Have you ever moved to a completely different state before? We’ve moved to different regions before.

Do you mind it when surveys ask you really personal questions? No. Isn’t that part of the point of surveys?

When was the last time you told someone you love them? Thursday or Friday I think, when Andi said it to me first and I said it back. I wasn’t having a good day and they were just looking out.

Which one would you like more: kiss on cheek / kiss on neck? Depends on my mood. Right now a kiss on the cheek sounds nice.

Does it bother you when people steal your stuff on MySpace? This never happened to me because I had Myspace for such a short time and I never caught it at its peak. Also, how do people steal your stuff over there? That’s pretty intriguing lmao

Do you have freckles? Do you like / dislike them? I don’t have any.

Who would you say is the best actor / or actress in your opinion? My biased ass would rally for Kate Winslet all the way, but some other great ones for me are Toni Collette, Emma Stone, Jodie Foster, and Natalie Portman.

How many times have you been drunk in your life? Many.

What would you do if the last person you kissed said they hated you? Be confused and ask them to give me a few concrete reasons. I don’t think too highly of myself, but I know I’ve never done anything to make me deserving of hate, especially with regard to us.

Do you ever think you might be pregnant? No, it has never been a worry of mine.

When was the last time you acted really immature? The weekend.

Do you enjoy watching comedies or horror movies more? Horror. I never watch comedies and the only subtype of it that I watch is romcom.

As a child, did you ever have an imaginary friend? Yeah but it lasted all of five minutes until I got bored with the concept.

Does anyone call you baby? Who would that be? No.

Can you rely on one or more people to take up for you? I have no idea what take up means. If this also means ‘stand up for me,’ then yeah I can.

#survey #surveys

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babbushka · 5 years ago

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Don't ever feel like venting is bad! Getting that sort of negativity out of your system is part of the process in getting back onto your feet. Be this posting on here, talking to someone irl or even just writing it down, ranting is sometimes needed to make progress. I think it's safe to say that any decent human being will have empathy for what you're going through and if you ever feel the need to talk/let it out I hope you know you can always post here :) [1]

I'm so so sorry, I won't ask for detail because I know thats probably smth too personal to put online. Being so young and vulnerable, and then being abused sort of feels like a different kind of pain, especially when things get so messy. To this day my ex still believes I'm just his 'crazy ex' and has ruined so many people's opinions of me. It's a difficult thing to deal with, especially when I'm having to piece together my trust in people again while he acts like the victim lol [2]

I too have no shame anymore haha. My way of thinking is that it makes people happy, be it writing or reading, doesn't hurt anyone, so where's the harm? Having your own little safe space, even if its a fictional world, is important. I think your doodles abt flip are really cute and if anyone has an issue point them my way and I'll kick their asses lol. I do feel a little awkward abt Adam Driver specifically just bc I know he has a wife and son. Thirsting over a dad will never not be weird lol [3]

Thank you for talking to me and answering questions! I hope your pain becomes a little more bearable and you can get some rest xx [4]

Yeah, no I know. It’s just one of those things where I don’t want it to feel like that’s all I do, is complain, you know? I definitely let it out when it needs to come out, but I’ve been trying to be more careful about constantly dumping all my mental/physical/irl life bullshit on everyone. I know everyone is going through their own stuff and it’s frustrating and not very helpful to see someone else’s suffering when you have your own.

You’re right, it does. It also sets us up for a lifetime of misery because how are we supposed to trust or open up to the possibility of anything good again from such an awful first go-around? I’m like aggressively insistent that there’s more opportunity for me to find someone and build a relationship with them, because that just cannot be it, you know? I hate shitty men so much ugh I’m so sorry.

Thank you for the kind words about the doodles! They’re very silly and fluffy and just make me smile and sometimes that’s all I need, lol. Yeah, I think that it’s a different situation to like, ship characters than ship real people with real lives, if that makes sense? The latter makes me kinda uncomfy but the former I’m all for lol. I’m very glad Adam doesn’t do social media, hoo boy.

#Anonymous #cowboy answers

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garyofrivia · 6 years ago

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a few Modern!Gang college AU headcanons!!!!!

not that anyone asked!!! and this has probably been done already!! but i’m bored at work so :/ i’m so sorry

Arthur:

graphic design major, creative writing minor

took a photography class to impress that cute albert boy from down the hall and worked extra hard all semester just to end up accidentally telling his advisor that he wanted to double minor in photography as well

Tired™

he’s def one of those students that can fall asleep a n y w h e r e on campus

has a sleeve tattoo and is working on a second ;;;)))

he doesn’t party often, but when he does, the entire fire department and 7 cop cars show up by the end of the night to break it up

there was a rumor his sophomore year that he beat up 5 frat dudes at once during rush week for harassing girls and no one has heard of any issues from that frat since

is banned from the local chili’s for dining and dashing

shoplifts chef boyardee, microwavable ramen, and snickers bars from the student center convenience store to Survive

Charles:

environmental studies major

is in 50000000 activist clubs

regularly punches racist white boys w/ maga merch in the dorm common rooms and when the RA saw one time he didn’t do jack shit bc…. he right

he’s never procrastinated an assignment in his life

studies until 5 am every night but? still wakes up at the crack of dawn to go to the gym????

works part time as a barista at a hole in the wall coffee shop/bookstore and is 100% a coffee snob

doesn’t smoke but knows every weed dealer on campus, mostly bc they’re all enviro studies majors

his roommate thinks he’s a myth bc he’s never there or is just super quiet, but rly he just Minds His Damn Business

can be seen reading for leisure on the quad when it’s sunny and warm

Dutch:

political science major, philosophy minor

arthur and hosea are his friends from high school and they’re the only ones that can tolerate his mood when he goes on Insane procrastination benders where he’s trying to write 4 essays in a single night on a fuck ton of adderall and energy drinks

frequently goes on rants while studying in the student center about capitalism and it somehow always results in him on top of a table, yelling about ronald reagan

it gets Annoying when he talks about ancient greece, which is… constantly..

has 4 girlfriends and 3 boyfriends but still has time to participate in debate team every saturday

accidentally incited a student labor strike on campus one time and the cafeteria wasn’t functional for a week

started 6 clubs, but never goes to meetings and can’t remember what literally any of them are for

doesn’t work at all but somehow? always has money??? like he pays for his friends’ dinners all the time?? how??????

Hosea:

graduate economics student

he’s that cool TA in a super hard class that sends the prof’s tests from previous semesters to all the students so they can study for the final

Constantly in the library reading/studying/tutoring

still lives on campus for some reason and pirates textbook pdfs out of his dorm room

has a 4.2 gpa, but acts like he’s never been to a single class in his life

gets high all the time and talks about moving to europe on a whim and is *THIS* close to just fuckign doin it

makes his own kombucha

when he can’t sleep bc of test anxiety he rambles to arthur and dutch until the wee hours of the morn about existentialism and how great the beatles were

is responsible for multiple people discovering they have a daddy kink despite not having one himself

John:

undecided major (communications maybe, but he hasn’t found his “passion” yet)

failed freshman english twice for just not showing up to class

drives one of those old subarus from the 90’s and does donuts in the student lot when it snows

has a CD collection from his Emo™ days in the glove box and pops one in every now and then when he’s alone and feelin’ nostalgic/sad

skateboards to class and usually almost runs over a bunch of people since he always has headphones on

death note is his favorite anime

that One Room on your hall that is ALWAYS playing loud ass music until 3am

is surprisingly really good at math and tries to help tutor his friends but gets frustrated when they don’t understand “basic” calculus on the first try

his favorite hobby is harassing the ducks on campus and has made enemies of multiple geese

Sadie:

criminology major

plays intramural sports, probably volleyball and softball

everyone’s Jock Girlfriend they wished they had but are too afraid to talk to bc she might snap someone’s neck if they look at her wrong

wears leather jackets and aviators for every occasion

one time gave a monologue about sexism in her political theory class after not saying anything for the entire semester and her professor was moved to tears

has a lot of friends but only a few are ride or die babey!!!!!!!! (it’s arthur, charles, and abigail and they bully john together)

knows a lot about cars and ppl pay her to fix theirs since college kids usually can’t afford to go to a garage

speaks german because she got bored one summer and taught herself a fucking language i guess

Sean:

french major (????why is he like that???)

he says he’s studying a different language because the thinks it’ll make him hotter, but really it’s because he fantasises about moving away one day to start a new life

always says how college isn’t really for him and is .2 seconds away from dropping out

hangs out with john a little too much for his own good and once broke his wrist while trying his skateboard

“hey, have you heard of [insert incredibly obscure punk rock band name here]?”

gets blackout drunk every weekend and keeps a journal for the sole purpose of documenting the various places he’s woken up

wears stupid beanies and owns one (1) hoodie that he wears year round

quotes memes out loud to be able to communicate his emotions effectively

a ~Film Hoe~

also………. he vapes

Javier:

international studies major, finance minor

studied abroad in spain and almost didn’t come back bc he loved it so much

plans to get mega rich so he can travel Everywhere

um,,, he loves classic lit and owns an entire library full of it

took a gap year after high school to tour with his band and kinda became a lil famous so that’s cool

runs a thirst trap instagram acct and models part time ;)

every single person that encounters him has been attracted to him in one way or another and they truly don’t even question it

he’s a major mama’s boy and she visits him all the time

he rooms with sean who drives him insane but they have similar music tastes and were able to bond over that

they get rowdy on saturdays but has his (few) friends over on sundays for a “family dinner”

Bill:

computer science major

used to play COD competitively and wants to get into videya game development

seems like kind of an idiot when he asks questions in class but his grades show that he’s smarter than he looks

did ROTC for the tuition money but dropped as soon as he found out that you have to enlist after you graduate lmao

southern angery boi that drives a pickup truck and hosts tailgates every single football game

has a bunch of dudebro friends that he hangs out with due to societal pressure, but all he wants to do is bake some cookies

his roommate was scared of him at first but when he bought him a lil gift for christmas before break, he realized that he was a big ole softie

is late to class bc he spends 65943598 years on his hair in the morning even though it literally never looks different

Lenny:

english major, applying to the education masters degree program

he wants to be a high school english teacher fuck me up!!!!!!

was super homesick when he first moved away :(

writes his friends papers for them sometimes even though he’s killing himself with his own schoolwork

netflix binges and video game benders are regular weekend activities and he’s been known to not move from his chair for 15 hours at a time

runs an avengers stan blog and cried at comic con when he met robert downey jr

begged the manager at the local comic book store for a job and the guy was just like “yeah, kid literally just apply online idc”

has lots of friends that rope him into doing hooligan shit instead of study

is a giant ball of anxiety for the majority of the semester and is just,, Trying His Best

Micah:

he was the maga kid that charles knocked out the first week of classes

#rdr2 #red dead redemption 2 #rdr headcanons #rdr2 HCs #modern rdr2 #jedmdjskjdkd jk about micah i cant do him out of pure bias so feel free to add him or anyone else!!!!!#this is EXTREMELY self indulgent wow #pls dont drag me

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sweetnestor · 7 years ago

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Stone Cold | august.

omg what another story yell heah leggo

university au, platonic + romance + angst, teamiplier + jack

sequel to: Story of Another Us | also on ao3

Bella’s song choice: These Four Walls by Little Mix

I couldn’t remember the last time I heard a knock on my door. I hadn’t had any visitors in a long while. I figured it was probably a package I forgot I ordered, so I pushed myself out of bed. This was one of the few things that got me moving these days, aside from aching hunger and thirst. I went over and stood at the door until I heard footsteps indicating that the mailman had left.

But instead, there was another knock. It made my heart pound and send adrenaline down my veins. Who could possibly want to see me? Was I getting evicted? Did my ex come back to give me another box of my belongings? I took a deep breath and forced myself to look through the peephole. To be honest, the amount of time it took me to do that simple action that any normal human could do should have been long enough for that person to deem I wasn’t home and just leave. But he was still there, and once I caught a glimpse of him I quickly rushed to answer the door.

I had been crying on and off for the last few weeks. I was very sensitive to every little thing, and this particular thing wasn’t so little. Going by that logic, I flung myself into my friend Jack’s arms and pretty much lost it.

He didn’t hesitate or bat an eyelash. He just held me while I tried to get my shit together. I hadn’t been held like this in a long while. I didn’t have any sort of comfort except for spending more money than I actually had. But to have Jack here made me feel so much better, despite the fact that I was sobbing like a baby. He just let me, because he knew what had happened in the last month. I had spent countless nights crying to him over the phone, venting to him from thousands of miles away. That was another thing that got me up and moving as well.

“Come on, Bella,” he softly told me, closing the door behind him.

“Okay,” I breathed out, wiping my tears away. “Okay…”

“It’s okay… you’ve been holding that in for a while, haven’t you?”

I nodded. “I just needed a hug.”

“I’m glad I’m here then.”

We went over and sat on the couch. I grabbed the tissues from the coffee table and wiped the mess on my face. Once I had composed myself, it really occurred to me that Jack was here. Here in Los Angeles, California, in my apartment, and I had received no indication of it prior.

The last time I saw him was over a month ago, during Vidcon. I mean, I didn’t go to the convention due to sheer anxiety, given that it was just after Christina Grimmie passed and the tragedy in Orlando. Jack came by my apartment to see me, but it was cut very short because of his schedule. It was before the breakup, so I was okay with him leaving so abruptly. But now, I wasn’t sure what made him come all this way. Surely, it wasn’t because of me and the mess I’ve become.

“What are you doing here?” I asked him, my voice trembling slightly.

“You haven’t been online, have you?” he asked in response.

It was true. It only took one mention of it from me for mine and Mark’s followers to go insane. I didn’t want to face any backlash, or any words of comfort. I didn’t want to see adorable little gif edits of me and Mark. I didn’t want to see the tag “relationship goals” on pictures of us. I didn’t want to see sad edits of us, or people expressing their sad feelings about the breakup. I didn’t want to see the theories on this Amy Nelson girl and what the internet thought of her. I didn’t stay online long enough to see responses to my tweets, reblogs, or even my videos. I didn’t want to feel anything, I just wanted to avoid it all.

Because of that, I missed a lot of Jack’s videos. I knew if I went on YouTube, I would definitely end up binging on Mark’s videos instead and just make myself sad again. Not that I wasn’t sad before. Then YouTube would turn into Tumblr, then Twitter, and so on.

Jack shifted in his seat, averting eye contact. Now that I was looking at his face, he looked different. He looked how I felt.

“Yeah… it seems like we’ve both had bad breakups.”

If my heart wasn’t already broken…

“Jack, I’m so sorry,” I told him sincerely. “When did this happen?”

“It was only about a week or two ago. I haven’t really talked about it with anyone personally, but I did touch on it in a video,” he explained. “You know, just to let everyone know.”

I linked my arm with his and lied my head on his shoulder. The gravity of the situation was setting in. Here we were, two broken hearts. Here we were, in the same place at the same time, feeling the same feelings.

“Do you wanna talk about it?” I asked.

“No… not yet,” he replied. “Do you wanna talk about it?”

“Mmm… no. We should plan for that.”

“What? A huge crying session?”

I chuckled lightly. “Why not? We’ll have ice cream and tequila.”

“Make it whiskey and you have a deal.”

The fact that he chose alcohol over ice cream said a lot. He was in a pretty bad spot. I had to be here for him now. I had to be a good friend to him.

If only I could get out of my own dark hole…

“So you’re here because of your breakup?” I asked after some silence.

“No, it didn’t fuck me up that much,” he said. “YouTube University is still going on, so I signed up for some classes.”

Oh, right. The school board made a huge deal about shutting down campus after the last spring semester, only to end up not doing it at all. All the protests and petitions made them crack in the end. That was the last thing I remember reading about before I made my online appearance scarce. Class registration went up at one point, and I missed all the deadlines.

“And,” Jack continued, “I think I need to be around friends. I miss everyone too much.”

Oh, right. Jack has other friends. And a schedule. And a stable life.

I sat up and unlinked our arms. I feared the answer to my next question, but I took a deep breath. “So where did you come from just now?”

“Um… I came from Mark’s house.”

My heart sank. I could know about everything my ex was up to, just through Jack. I could find out about Amy. I could know if Mark was happy with her, if he forgot about me.

“Does… does he know you’re here?”

“Yeah, his friend Tyler dropped me off here… and I know you’re going to ask. Are you sure you wanna hear about all of that?”

I thought about it, but decided against it. I felt like having anything to do with my ex would make that crying session start sooner than planned. All I knew was that Matt and Ryan did end up quitting, and that’s only because I was there when it happened. Mark’s new editor happened to be friends with his… Amy. That was probably how they met.

“So I’m taking the semester off,” I said, changing the subject. “I’ll probably go back to YTU in the spring. Maybe.”

“Really?” Jack was surprised. “How come?”

I shrugged, lying my head back on his shoulder. “Not really up for it. Don’t feel like being around people.” Truth is, I thought I was going to be dead before September so I didn’t bother with class registration. I decided not to share that information with Jack.

“Bella, you know that’s not good for you,” he told me. “Have you even stepped outside since the breakup?”

Once, when I was sent to the hospital. Again, not sharing that with Jack.

“For therapy,” I replied simply.

“Oh, come on Bellers. You need to be around people. I know you’re sad and it hurts, believe me. But slowly, we’re gonna get you out of this.”

“But what about you?” I asked in response. “You know how I feel. Don’t tell me you don’t wanna sink into the ground and be sad too.” I didn’t want to get out of this hole. It was all I knew. It was all I had.

“I do,” Jack admitted. “There’s been plenty of days where I just want to give up, even more so without Signe. But I’m keeping myself occupied and giving myself reasons to remain motivated.”

Motivation? Don’t know her.

“Now, I’m not saying you have to go to YTU this semester,” he told me. “But there are going to be events and things happening, and I want you to go to those with me. We’ll take baby steps until we actually feel like being people again. Okay?”

I nodded, even though it sounded terrible. I just wanted to stay confined in the four walls of my bedroom.

_______

next chapter

#jacksepticeye x oc #crankgameplays x oc #jacksepticeye x reader #ethan nestor x reader #sc fic #sweetheart writes #soooOOOOO MUCH SHIT HAPPENS YALL DONT K N O W

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saviormysticmeme · 8 years ago

Text

RFA Reactions to Witchy MC

Disclaimer: They might all be a little OCC, theres some spoilers, some of them get fluffy and smutty. Mainly Sevens. Also don’t think anything I typed is the sole accurate representation of Witch craft. Pls, it’s just what I occasionally practice and I’m by no means the most informed.

If you like it pls let me kno am desperate for deh reveews uwuwuwuwwu and if you do let me know if you want the minor trio.

Lmao ok I’ll stop being garbage I’m sorry.

Yoosung

He didn’t know cause you never told him. You weren’t really scared of telling him, but there never seemed to be a time to mention it

He never noticed how many different pendants and gemstones you had, and if he did he just thought they were an ~*aesthetic*~ choice

You didn’t pay much mind to him not paying mind, and you didn’t try to avoid doing witchy things around him, you just tended to do them more when alone

So one day while Yoosung was at class you were feeling the ~vibes~ and decided to do some sachets of assorted herbs and stones for any number of purposes. You were planning a luck one, a happy feeling one, maybe even a love one for the bedroom.

You lost track of time and Yoosung came home to find you sitting at the kitchen table with a bunch of plant leaves, rocks, and tiny felt bags.

You just looked up and “Oh, uh, hey Babe”

Yoosung didn’t really know what he was looking at and just “Hey Babe……”

…….

“Whatchya doin?”

So you told him. You make sachets and charms and occasionally meditate and try to open your third eye and you believe in any number of things that are considered supernatural and-

Yoosung loves it immediately.

“Oh my god my babes a witch! You’re like, a real life mage! Oh my god so you cast spells and stuff???”

You chuckle “Well sometimes yeah but I’m not vanquishing monsters I’m usually just like, trying to make myself feel more creative”

He still loves it. He wants to learn things. Teach him the things.

He ends up sitting at the table with you and you tell him what all the different plants and stones are for. He gets super into it.

He joins you for witchy activities once a week now.

Whenever he cooks he gives you the leftovers and you put it out as an offering for any deity of your choosing.

You make him a jar stuffed with assorted things that are supposed to bring success and victory. He keeps it next to his computer and everytime he wins a tough battle he yells a thank you to you and kisses the jar.

Does not stop bragging to his online friends “My sweetheart is basically a mage. How cool??”

Jaehee

You knew Jaehee was sorta religious and you were scared to bring up the whole “Hey I participate in witchcraft thing”

You constantly ran the conversation over in your head “Hey Baehee, I uh, I’m a witch. Now contrary to popular belief, Witchcraft isn’t a religion! It’s just a practice...like...yoga. Kind of...So...cool?”

No not cool You couldn’t convince yourself to talk to her about it.

She’s really level headed...but you were so scared to ruin things with her.

So you just resolve to bottle it up and handle it another day and keep all your witchy shit packed up until you figure out what to do.

But one day you come home from shopping and find Jaehee holding a box of Tarot cards

Yours

Shit shit shit shit shit

She looks up and sees you ghosting in the doorway

“MC!”

“Please don’t break up with me” It just kinda fell out of your mouth

“What” She looks confused for a second “If anything I should ask you not to break up with me. I didn’t mean to go through your stuff, I was trying to clean the shelf and I was too short and I reached for a box and all your stuff fell out, and, I’m sorry it all just looked so interesting…”

Does she know? Baehee do you know? Speak to me.

You just stare at her for a second

“Are you mad?” She asks

“No…..are you?”

“What? Why would I be mad?”

“That I do, like, witch stuff?”

“Oh what? Not at all, I think it’s very interesting. I was at a coffee shop once and ended up meeting a wiccan actually. She and I talked for a bit. Are wiccan and witch the same thing?”

“Oh actually-” And the two of you fell into conversation, you explaining the ins and outs of everything, what's this and what's that, how to do this and how to do that. Baehee is fascinated. Fill her thirst for knowledge MC. Fill it.

From then on whenever she sees you doing stuff it’s a one sided game of 20 questions, but you don’t mind at all.

You start brewing her coffee every morning, stirring clockwise and pouring positive intentions and love into it.

Jaehee wants to know the science of witchcraft because she swears she can taste the love.

Zen

Zen found out rather quickly

He was running late to a rehearsal and he was going to take his bike, which you thought was wicked cool, but it also scared the shit out of you because this boy

Oiiiii

This boy sometimes forgets his helmet he’s in such a rush. And he fkn speeds.

You just got really nervous and called for him to wait.

“What is it MC? I’m sorry to leave so soon but the Director just called and they need me-”

“No I know just-” you were fishing around in the bag you usually carry around with you. “I just want to give you something”

“Is it a goodbye kiss?” He smirked and sauntered over to you, he took your shoulder in his hand and went to spin you around and kiss you, but as he spun you, you put a little bag in front of his face. He just stared at it for a second.

“MC...is this...pot? You want to smoke with me befo-”

You blushed so hard “No! It’s sage, and lavender, and theres a charm fo-” You shook your head as if to physically clear your thoughts. “It’s just...a little ‘Safe Travels’ bag. I know it seems silly but I’d feel better if you took it cause I kno-”

He cut you off with a really strong kiss and took the sachet out of your hand. When he pulled away he had a big smile on his face and he looked so happy. “I’ll always keep it with me then. Thank you, Love.” And he put it in his jacket pocket and zipped it up, gave it a pat, grabbed his helmet, and headed out the door. But not before winking at you. And blowing you a kiss. And telling you all men are beasts. And asking if you ate. And-

When he got home from practice that night you guys ended up talking about your whole witchery thing

You told him you like to do a lot of divination. Palm reading, tarot reading, tea leaf reading. Sometimes when you have someone to do it with Ouiji board

MC THAT IS TOO SCARY FOR YOU DON’T TALK TO DEAD PEOPLE THEY MIGHT BE BEASTS

Zen they’re dead pls

He really likes you reading his palm. Even though you say the same thing most of the time. You realize later he just likes you holding his hand. Goddammit Zen.

But he’s really supportive, it doesn’t hurt his ego feeds off of your readings telling him he’s going to do well.

“Do the tarot cards say I’m hot?” “Zen that’s not really-” “They think I’m ugly???” “...Oh look uh….Nine of Wands. That means uh...ur so hot. Yeah. You got it.”

“You know what card I think is better?” He smirks. “What card?” You ask

Like a fucking magician, without even looking he pulls a card out of the deck and says “The Lovers” AND IT’S THE FUCKING LOVERS CARD

HOW DID HE

WHAT

ZEN

ARE YOU?

Kiss.

Jumin

You know Jumin grew up going to church. You know he’s not suuuuper devout. But Catholic enough that you reallllly don’t want to tell him. You only wear subtle things, bracelets and stuff that could pass off as just decorative and not really “Hey I’m a Witch”y

All your stuff is in storage. The cards, the stones, the jars. Almost everything aside from a few pieces of jewelry and ‘decor’ pieces.

You’ve actually been feeling pretty down about it. Your energy is at an all time low if you’re not with Jumin because in your free time this is what you’d do. But you love Jumin so much you can’t risk losing him.

You resolve to meditate still. You don’t have to be a witch to meditate.

So you get into the habit of meditating quite often. While you feel happy you can focus on searching your soul and strengthening your mind, you still miss everything else.

But you don’t have time to miss everything when there comes a week where everything is just going wrong for Jumin. Work his hard, his Dad continues to stress him out with a new girlfriend, and V is being realllly elusive again to Jumin’s dismay.

Whenever he’s home he’s in his office or pacing around the room trying to find something to distract himself. When he snuggles with you, you can feeeeel the stress radiating off of him. Even Elizabeth isn’t calming him.

So you decide it’s time to do what you do best

Spiritual healing

One day while Jumin’s at work you go out and get a bunch of candles. Like a ton. Like you just made a small business owner a very happy person. You got mostly lavender and jasmine. Both are supposed to help promote feelings of caaaalmness.

You set them all around the bedroom because it was the place most closed off from technology, people, distractions in general. You also made some tea, set it with intentions to calm, and put it on the bedside table just as Jumin was walking in the door.

“Honey your home!” You walked into the living room. Jumin kissed you on the cheek “Hello Kitten, how was your day?” You totally ignored his question and just “I have something for you. I noticed you’ve been stressed lately.” “MC you shouldn’t ha-” “Shush and just come on” You took his hand and led him to the bedroom.

Once you were in there he just looked around in amazement. The room was completely dark except for the light of the candles flickering off the walls. The smell seemed to cradle the both of you in a really nice feeling.

You looked at Jumin and realized his suit was not going to be comfortable. Without saying a word you undid the top few buttons of his shirt and started untying his tie.

“Well Kitten, I have to say you certainly wanted to surprise me” He had the voice. Why does he have the voice?

He grabbed your waist and pulled you close, his sultry fucking voice in your ear “All these candles, we’re going to have fun tonight huh?”

WHAT? DADDY JUMIN NO. THIS IS NOT WHAT THE CANDLES ARE FOR.

Well I mean the idea certainly seemed to put him in a better mood so maybe you could just do that inste-

No MC! We are sticking to the plan but maybe later

You put your hands on your chest and slowly push him back “N-No Jumin that’s not why I did this”

What? Jumin Han does not compute. What are candles used for in the bedroom aside from really kinky-

You took a seat on the bed cross legged and gestured for him to sit across from you, which he did (even though he seemed a little confused and disappointed)

You handed him one of the tea cups as you took a long sip from yours. He copied your actions but kept his eyes on you. You put your cup down and so did he.

“I want us to meditate together” You said. He just kind of stared at you. “You’ve been really stressed out lately and I think this could be really good for you!”

He let out a long breath. You could tell instantly he was not feeling it. “MC I appreciate it but I don’t think sitting in the quiet is going to help me right now.”

No but pouring hot wax on me would?

“Please Jumin. I know it seems really silly to you know, but you’d be surprised how good you can feel after.” He pursed his lips. Time to pull out the big guns “Please? For me?”

He held his breath for a moment and sighed. Hook line and sinker.

“Alright. What do I do?”

Your face lit up and you let out a little squeal and clapped. You turned on some white noise that sounded like ocean, straightened your back, closed your eyes, and let out a deep breath.

“So first, your breathing-” And you began walking Jumin through the meditation process. You used your instructor voice, calm, slow, relaxing. You’d occasionally open your eyes to peek at Jumin and make sure he was actually doing what you were saying and not just pretending. To your pleasant surprise, he was. And he genuinely seemed to be doing better than before. His whole aura felt lighter, more organized.

After about an hour of sitting together, at least 20 mins of it were just silence, you start to bring him back to the real world.

“And open your eyes when you feel grounded”

He took a minute and opened them

You could see a hint of amazement in them

“Well...I actually do feel very….relaxed.” You clap, ecstatic. “MC, this is...strange. I’ve sat in the quiet before but it’s never felt so good...How did you do that?”

Meditation became a common thing for the two of you. So common Jumin renovated a room to be your personal meditation place. He said being in the bedroom with you and candles could be verrrry distracting sometimes. He had the room set up with very comfortable mats, a little table that would sit between the two of you with tea and whatever post meditation snack you chose, surround sound for your white noise or music, and basically anything you could ask for.

More and more you incorporated your craft into your own personal meditation, never wanting to force it onto Jumin, but when he’d question the gems surrounding you you didn’t hesitate to tell him. You felt meditation had brought you two even closer and you knew you could trust him. So you told him all about your witchy shenanigans.

“Kitten, you thought I wouldn’t accept it?”

“I was scared. So scared of losing you, just over some personal beliefs…”

“Kitten, even if I was to disagree, I could never leave you just because our spiritual beliefs don’t line up. I would respect that you have your practice and I have mine, simply because that seems like the adult thing to do, but also because I...I love you.”

You may have teared up a bit. Maybe. I dont know I’m a bitch with a kink for understanding and accepting partners ok leave me alone

Baeyoung/707/Luciel/Love of my Life

I feel like Seven would figure it out quick and wouldn’t even be phased

“Boy MC you sure like mason jars”

“Uh” O shit that was fast

“And gems, and plants, and pentagrams, and- oh. I get it. You’re a witch?!”

“Yeah…” Is...Is he cool with it

“Neat!!!”

707 witch fanboy confirmed

He starts talking about all the metaphysical health benefits of all your stuff

Seven I know it’s my stuff

Yeah but get this- Then he drops mad knowledge on you that you didn’t know.

“How did-” “Witchcraft always struck me as really cool, so I researched it in my free time a lot when I was younger….MC do you know what this means?” What does it mean Seven “We’re getting a cat” Seven I don’t need a ca- “No you need to have black cat to be a real witch” Seven I think you just wan- “And if our cat is all black it’ll look extra cute when she plays with Elly~” I don’t think Jumi-

You guys got the cat. His name is Yin. Jumin is really confused as to why Seven starts calling Elly ‘Yang’ but that’s for another time.

You never really address Seven’s feelings on witchcraft vs his upbringing. If he’s happy you’re happy.

He’s very happy. He loves watching you do witchy things. He usually sits there with a dopey smile on his face. He swears he’s so in love with you and everything you do and ugh, you’re his little Witchy Babe <3

He has at least 3 charms on him at any point in time that you made for him.

During hugs he loves taking long whiffs because you always smell good

You guys go stargazing a lot and look at constellations. He liked doing that even before he knew you were a witch but now that he knows you guys talk about the gods and myths they align with and astrological meaning and what not.

Seven keeps joking about how cool it’ll be when you guys get married on the moon because you’re gonna be a Space Witch.

Seven programs a little digital alter on the computers in the house. They’re so cute and thoughtful and interactive it’s so neat.

He also makes you the coolest witch blog the internet ever did see.

You always get random spells forwarded to you by him

Suddenly he goes on a ‘Bath Magic’ kick. Literally all day “Yule time bath” “Self love bath spell” “Protection from bad energy bath”. You’re at work so you just text him back “Whats your obsession with these lol?”

…

“I was hoping we could do them together ;)”

Ohgodohgodohgod don’t blush at work.

You get home that day and you hear running water upstairs. You know immediately. You go upstairs to find Seven waiting for you at the door of the bathroom, wearing nothing but a towel around his waist and a couple necklaces you had made for him, his glasses slightly fogged up from the steam of the bath he just drew

“My Love?”

Insta melted heart oh mah gawwwwwww

Red candles light the room and it smells amazing. What is that? Seven what did you mix holy shit. And then, of course, rose petals floating in the tub and littering the floor.

You two slide into the bath after Seven takes his sweet time stripping you down, kissing you here and there

The second you hit the water you feel relaxed. Hot baths are nice. Hot baths with a hot boy are double nice. Hot baths with a hot boy catering to your Witch vibes? Fkn fire.

“Saeyoung,” he knows you’re feeling good when you use his real name. “What is this for? I mean, roses? Red candles? I already love you, you goof ball.”

“I know. It’s...It’s a few things I guess. It started as a self love thing.” What. “I know you hate it when I’m hard on myself, so I try not to be but sometimes I just...can’t help it. So I looked up some self love charms and what not and I found a bath spell and figured it was worth a shot…” Your heart broke a little. You couldn’t take your eyes off the water. You thought he had been feeling better since saving his brother. You never noticed...oh god you felt so awful you could cry. You felt like you failed him.

You turned your head to him “Seven, I’m so sorr-”

“I’m not finished.” You looked at his face finally and a small smile played on his lips. “And I kept looking at bath stuff and there were couples ones too and I realized that whenever I’m sad. Whenever I feel unworthy...you’re there for me. You always make me feel loved and make me feel worthy. And that as long as you’re by my side...everything will be ok. So when I found a couples bath and realized it had a lot of the same ingredients as the lonely one I figured...why not do both?”

He pulled you close, mouth so close his breaths kept grazing your ear and sending a shiver down your spine. “And let’s face it… bathing together with rose petals and candles is pretty fucking hot”

fuCKIN CHILLS

“And I put sugar in the water” he ran his tongue across the back of your shoulder “It makes you taste pretty fkn good”

M e l t e d

Ok I’m done being a garbage can bye

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