#song seunghyun

[ravenclawfromdistrictfour]

[welcome2thetop]

Looks like Player 196 did take a photo with the legend Thanos, along with Player 256 and Thanos' bestie Player 124.

[prodineonblue]

thanos and kang mi na 💔

let's try getting it out there again cause the first time got 1 note (love that 1 liker btw xx)

[dovediva]

edited namgyu in my native language :(

.

[red-hood-vigilante]

watching gdragon publicly yearn and pine over t.o.p. is just witnessing a kdrama irl

[j-a-nuary]

Date Roulette: Jiyong

Wednesday

Intro Week Start

Seungri Week Start

Daesung Week Start

Taeyang Week Start

Seunghyun Week Start

Jiyong Week Start

Previous

Next

=====

Warning level: suggestive

=====

Seunghyun had refused. He refused a lot of things. The only thing that I was truly annoyed with however was his refusal to tell me about how his conversation with Jiyong had gone last night. I knew that Jiyong wouldn't be able to resist telling me all about it though. He'd probably start by acting like I'd personally betrayed him too.

Such were the vague thoughts circling through my slowly waking mind.

But then I was pulled against a bare chest, and a hand started tracing up my side. His fingers skimmed along my skin, leaving the faintest touches behind like ripples.

I hummed, enjoying the attention washing over me.

The hand paused.

I made a whining noise in my throat.

The hand landed firmly on my hip, a throaty chuckle sounding behind me as lips met the skin on the back of my shoulder.

"You're awake."

It wasn't exactly a question, so I didn't exactly answer it.

Instead I turned, maneuvering so I could swing one leg over Seunghyun's hip. I ran my hand through his hair, stopping to grip the hair at the back. I directed his mouth to my own.

He laughed, letting a few kisses lane before turning onto his back.

I tried to follow him, such as it was, but he held me off.

"Hyun…" I whined, nuzzling against his shoulder.

"Baby, I have to leave before everyone gets up."

=====

Seunghyun slipped back out of the glass doors, trying to avoid the cameras in the hall. Somewhere, deep in my stomach, a stone dropped into the previously calm water. A feeling like shame rippled outwards, threatening to spill out.

I'm being kept secret.

I resisted the thought, deciding to get up and see what today's plan was.

As soon as I stood, I was taken over by dizziness. I immediately sat back down. Glancing around, I spotted the wine glasses that had been left on the vanity. I took a minute to steel myself before slowly making my way to the vanity. Lifting both glasses, I felt myself sway slightly.

It took another rest at the vanity, a second sitting on the closed lid of the toilet, four wine glass-fulls of water, and a round of catching up on texts before I could rouse the ability to get dressed.

From: Hugeboy I was thinking about you~ From: Hugeboy I keep thinking about you (♡◇♡) From: Hugeboy It makes me want to text you |ω･) From: Hugeboy You're always so busy (´Д` ) From: Hugeboy I'll see something and want to send you a picture but I feel like I'm bothering you orz

There were a few messages from Soo-ah as well. They were mostly a series of links to apartment listings, but she also included a photo of herself visiting Ttungbo in the kennel.

I spotted an expensive pair of sneakers sticking out from the bottoms of some baggy jeans behind her. There was no doubt in my mind that they belonged to Bobby.

=====

"Glasses day?"

I groaned, hoping the tone was enough to answer Daesung's question. Shuffling to the breakfast bar, I posted up on one of the stools and bent forward to lay on the counter.

"Ay, bendita…" a hand gently patted my hair, "drink too much last night?"

I turned my head so I could blink up at Daesung.

"What?"

He gave me a smile before turning towards the fridge. Opening the door, he bent at the waist as he spoke up again.

"Taeyang mentioned that he thought you and Jiyong went for drinks or something. Said," he stood up and turned towards me, a small hangover drink in hand, "you were acting weird. Here."

He cracked the seal, opening the bottle before placing it on the counter next to me. Task done, he turned and started opening cabinets.

I struggled to decide which end of the conversation to tackle first. A phrase about eating frogs floated through my mind.

Pushing myself to sit up, I pulled the drink closer.

"What else did Taeyang say?"

I chugged the bottle, hoping it would somehow soften whatever was said next.

He hummed, pulling a pan out and clicking the range on.

"That you seemed glad to be interrupted."

How diplomatic. I set the now empty bottle aside, leaning forward onto my elbows.

"He's not wrong."

I picked at my nails, not really wanting to go much further. Still, I knew it was somewhat unavoidable. The proximity of everyone, the nature of people… it would probably be better to just have a conversation than to let things get all clouded and smoky with assumptions and half…

Smoky.

My nose twitched.

Looking up, I saw Daesung standing in front of the stove top. He was staring at the pan in front of him, but obviously not seeing it.

"Dae," I called him quietly.

No response.

"Daesung." I was more firm this time, "the butter."

He shook his head, coming back to himself.

"Shit," he grabbed the pan and lifted it off of the range. He set it aside, onto an unlit section, before turning to face me.

I shook my head, "turn that off."

"Right," he turned back and fumbled with the knob until the flame disappeared. Kitchen no longer in danger of burning down, he set his sights back on me.

Thus commenced the staring match. I was willing to let it stretch as long as possible, but I could see him getting twitchy after a few seconds.

Sighing, I leaned back on the barstool.

"Just ask, Dae."

"What happened with Seungri?"

I stared at him. Did he really not know? And what was the point in knowing?

After a moment, I shook my head.

"Ask something else."

Daesung had the decency to look ashamed. He nodded to himself for a moment before taking a breath to speak.

"Did Jiyong…" he paused, apparently struggling to come up with the right words.

"It's not the same," I interrupted him, "it's more… just… confusing."

"Confusing," he echoed me.

"If I could explain it, I would."

Shaking his head, he turned back towards the stove.

"You don't have to explain," he pulled paper towels from the cupboard and started cleaning the burned butter from the pan. "As long as he didn't… hurt you."

I tried to decipher the vibes of the kitchen. He didn't sound too upset. That was part of it but he was being cautious too - understandable, given the topic.

I didn't exactly want to contribute to what I was interpreting as him being concerned, but I also didn't want to keep everything to myself.

"Not physically anyway," I said it quietly, giving him the option of pretending he hadn't heard, "and not on purpose, I think."

Daesung sighed, shoulders slumping. He kept his attention on the food he was preparing this time when he spoke.

"That doesn't exactly inspire confidence, pet."

I shrugged, laying down to once again press my cheek onto the cool stone of the counter.

"This is just how I have to live for now."

I let my eyes close, warding against the building ache in my head and slight nausea that was creeping its way through my gut.

Daesung let me indulge in the self-soothing that was laying on the counter in silence. I listened to him move around the kitchen, soaking up the sounds and smells of his breakfast. Sizzling, crackling, tapping, scraping… I didn't have the neurological predisposition towards ASMR, but this must have been pretty close.

A distinctly ceramic dragging sound and slight thunk sounded like it was directly next to my head.

"Eat."

I peeked a single eye open. My sight was greeted by a plate of toast. Not just any toast though. Daesung had cut the center out of the bread and fried it with an egg. I closed my eye again, smiling.

"You're wonderful," I mumbled as I forced myself to sit up. "A delight, even."

=====

"Do you mind if I just…" I indicated the mouse in the staffer's hand.

She nodded, rolling her seat back a little to make room.

"You're familiar with it?" She asked.

"I'm more familiar with CAD," I mumbled, focusing more on the screen in front of me, "but SketchUp is fine."

"I thought you were an accountant."

I swapped the sofa and loveseat for a sectional and a shelf, creating a half wall to clearly define the spaces for eating and lounging.

"After I switched majors, yeah."

She fell silent, her assigned purpose for the day made obsolete.

The idea for this experiment was to test compatibility through interior design. I thought that's what it was anyway. We were each paired with someone who understood the software, given a blank rendering of an apartment, and told to fill the digital space to our liking.

Somewhere in the back of my mind, I wondered if there was another date on the line. They hadn't really thrown something like that in since the musical with Seunghyun. Had it not scored well with test audiences?

"Ugh," I couldn't stop the sound from exiting my mouth.

"Something wrong?"

I looked at the staffer, brain drawing a blank on how to explain the noise away.

"Oh," I was not off to a great start. "I just… um…"

"The color? Here," she rolled closer and took the mouse back. She shot me a brief smile as she moved. Conspiratorial, almost. Knowing.

I gave her a smile that was half grimace. Why was she covering for me? Was it a skill that all entertainment staff had? Or was it that often mysticalized feminine bond?

"Do you often work like this?"

She glanced up at me, quickly settling her eyes back on the computer screen.

"Not really," she tilted her head, making a few adjustments to the furniture on screen. "This is my first time, actually. What do you think?"

She indicated the screen.

I was blasted with dusty pink shades to go with the green options I had chosen. I made an effort to reign in my facial expression.

"Maybe a cream color instead?"

She nodded, and turned back to make the change.

"So what sort of work do you usually do?" I asked.

It was nice, talking to a normal person for a moment. I didn't have to fake my curiosity, or cover up what I already knew.

A bit of musical theater popped into my head.

Getting to know you. Getting to know all about you.

"-artments for rich types."

Shit. I had totally spaced out on her answer.

"What about you?" She asked.

"Oh," I shrugged, "I mean… I was doing the teacher thing for a while."

She let a small laugh out through her nose. I couldn't tell if it was in derision or just because of how common of a story it was.

"Stereotypical, right?" I joked.

Another nose laugh.

"But I finished studying and taking the KICPA test while I was doing that. So now…" I shrugged, "I'm not really sure."

"That's pretty specific," she replied, "how can you be unsure? Like this?"

I looked at the screen again. This time I was met with a much more calming, to me anyway, color pallette. Deep greens, warm creams… something out of a young adult novel about elves.

"I like it."

"Picasso."

We both broke down in giggles at that.

=====

Apparently, Seunghyun and I shared a "sense of movement." At least, that's what the expert said.

The six of us sat in an office, being shown each others' designs, while a not-quite-yet-elderly man explained the ways I was similar - or dissimilar - to each of the boys.

Daesung and I both had designed spaces that looked a bit like hobbit holes. Both of us shared an affinity for books and something like organized clutter. Where I had plants, he had an aquarium, both being examples of bringing nature inside.

Seunghyun and I shared ideas about how to move through the space. We had all been given the same floor plan, so I had thought we would each design something fairly similar in that way. But apparently Seunghyun and I were the only ones who had lent much thought to what it would be like to physically inhabit the space.

Taeyang shared my affinity for plants, but that was just about the sum total of our matching. Where I had placed a bookshelf intended for board games, he had put an upright piano. I supposed that made sense.

Jiyong was clearly a minimalist, but we apparently both intended to host others in that imaginary apartment. His design was probably best described as being sterile, but accommodating. Extra seating in the dining area, that sort of thing.

Seungri's design… well…

If you had asked me to design a space intended to be secretly unwelcoming, I might have done something like his. He had a sideboard positioned in such a way that I could easily imagine guests bumping their hip on it as they passed. The entire thing was, in a word, haphazard. It may have just been because he didn't take the task seriously, but it unnerved me.

Where the expert saw a lack of design smarts, I saw an apartment that was built to keep guests off balance.

Maybe that was a less than generous way of thinking about it, but I didn't think so. Regardless, possibly for the sake of the cameras, the other boys teased him about his perceived shortcoming.

I declined to join in the "fun" with them. Maybe a month ago I would have teased him as well but, knowing what I knew now, I couldn't force myself to make light of it.

Instead, I just nodded, acting like the designer was offering some enlightening explanation. A treatise on the connection between personality and decorating.

"So, in conclusion," the man clasped his hands together for just a moment, "I'd say that you three…"

He gestured at Seunghyun, Jiyong, and Daesung in turn.

"... are the best matches for Miss Luna here. Just," he shrugged, "in different ways."

"We already knew that," Taeyang laughed.

"Did we?" Seungri asked.

I wanted to hit him. Good lord how I wanted to hit him and hit him and hit him and hit him and h…

"You don't agree?" The expert asked.

"I think opposites can attract each other," Seungri shrugged. He turned to me. He addressed me, directly, for the first time in… how long? Two weeks? Three?

"We got along pretty well at the beginning, right?"

Silence filled the room as I pointedly ignored him. I could feel his eyes on me. I could feel the others getting more and more tense. I saw the expert's eyes flicking about the room, landing on each of us briefly before moving to the next.

I chose to trust the editors to take care of it.

"That can be true," Jiyong finally broke the silence, "but some people can be too different."

"I don't think we're that different."

There was a smile in his voice - a smile that I refused to look to confirm. I didn't know what fucking game he was playing, but I refused to play it with him.

"Isn't that a contradiction?" Taeyang asked. "Saying opposites attract, and then saying you two are similar? What's this guy saying?"

Taeyang laughed. I couldn't be sure, but I thought it was a practiced sound - disingenuous, but not obviously so.

"The whole point of the exercise was to find compatibility," the expert reminded us. "If you're unhappy with the results, you should reflect on why it came out that way."

=====

An envelope was waved, a staffer announcing that there was another date on the line. Someone suggested I choose my favorite apartment design. Someone else said that would be too much like a spoiler for my final choice.

More suggestions, more rebuttals.

I backed out of the decision-making process, citing the aforementioned spoiler concern. Instead, I sort of… disconnected. Standing to the side, I was aware of the people around me. On autopilot, I rocked on my heels, waiting for a decision to be made.

In true Kpop reality television style, it came down to rock-paper-scissors.

Taeyang excused himself from the trial, saying it should only be the top three - as decided by the design expert. Somewhere in the back of my mind, I made a note to thank him for that. Not so much for removing himself, but for creating a situation where Seungri didn't really have the option to participate.

It took six rounds, but eventually, Jiyong approached me. He grinned, offering me his hand.

"It's fate," he winked as he said it.

I blinked, coming back to myself. I felt a bit like I was waking up - groggy.

"Is that it?"

The question came out quieter than I intended. My gut twisted briefly, a bit of self-loathing triggered by the demure sound of my own voice. Oh well. It would probably play well with some part of the audience.

He tilted his head, smile not faltering thanks to years of idol training. I could see it in his shoulders, though, his chest angling silently to put more of himself between me and the others.

"Of course, my love.”

=====

“I have to admit,” Jiyong said while waiting for his manicure to set, “I convinced production to switch what they had planned for the date.”

He had suggested that we go to a salon he knew to have a combination of getting ready and getting pampered.

“What had they planned?”

“The premier showing of that movie,” he paused, checking his nails. “I don't remember the name. The post-rebellion mega-corporation one.”

I nodded, ignoring the minor heat-spike of my own nails curing under a lamp.

“The one that people said looks like Black Knight, right?”

Jiyong hummed, “with Woobin? Yeah.”

I nodded, humming a small acknowledgment as I watched the nail technician apply starry stencils to my nails.

“Did you choose a color?” The technician asked.

“A deep pink would look good,” Jiyong suggested.

The technician stood, hand already reaching for the pink and red section of the display.

“I want green,” I called out.

The technician paused, glancing between Jiyong and me.

“Like an apple,��� I insisted.

She still seemed unsure.

I grit my teeth to stop myself from saying something mean.

“That would be cute too,” Jiyong nodded.

Finally, the technician moved. She passed the reds, purples, and blues, coming to a stop where the greens and yellows were kept. Quickly selecting two bottles, she returned to her seat across from me.

“It's good that you two share tastes,” she commented. “Which one do you prefer?”

I blinked in the direction of the bottles, not fully absorbing the difference between the shades as I fought back a swirl of rage. I couldn't even pinpoint exactly which part of the interaction had annoyed me. The way Jiyong had spoken up - expecting his opinion to matter? The way the technician had clearly waited for him to approve of my choice? Sure, he had insisted he was paying, but these were still my nails. My nails, on my fingers. My body.

I realized I had been staring at the bottles for too long.

“The lighter one,” I decided just to be done with it.

“And for the accent nail?”

I actually did put a little bit of thought into that. I lifted a hand, looking over the stencils.

“You know those blush nails? Or aura?”

The technician nodded.

“That,” I laid my hand back onto the cushioned rest in front of me, “with the same green.”

=====

“How are you feeling?”

The manicures were done. I was sat in the passenger seat of a car that had previously thrilled me. But right now, it just annoyed me. It was ostentatious. It was meant to impress, and I had fallen for it.

“Fine,” my voice sounded empty, despite the overly practiced upward lilt.

“Good,” Jiyong busied himself with pulling out of the parking space, “I thought you might be tired.”

Here it is.

I was sure we had finally reached the point where he'd interrogate me about being with Seunghyun last night. The revelation of whatever they had discussed.

“I planned something a little quieter tonight,” he explained, “just in case.”

=====

I tried to ignore the semi-quiet of the restaurant. Jiyong must have done some form of reflecting on our past conversations because he at least didn't reserve the entire place. Still, it was clear that he wanted us to be alone. Thus, we had an entire room to ourselves.

I could tell from the layout that it was at least two sections. Perhaps three, depending on if the fireplace warranted its own division.

In light of everything I had come to know about Jiyong, I knew that this was probably the best compromise he could come up with. I, having repeatedly asked for normalcy, had the comfort of knowing there were other patrons elsewhere. He, wanting complete privacy, at least had the comfort of being out of view of the others.

“I feel like I should only whisper,” I whispered, “it feels like a library or something.”

Maybe I was playing up the naivete, but I knew the conversation was coming eventually. It was now my main mission to make it through the meal and back to the house while avoiding it.

Jiyong smiled. For a second, I saw the way he had looked at me while helping me get ready for the theater. The smile was all soft edges.

“Should we play a game?” He whispered back.

A thousand texts messages, cocky voices, and snapchats floated into one cohesive phrase in my mind.

If this motherfucker said twenty questions I would simply leave.

“What sort of game?”

His smile shifted somehow, going from soft to mischievous. I prepared myself to relive the cliche.

“Whoever stops whispering first loses.”

I glanced towards the decorative folding screen. behind it was the arched doorway that led to the bar and main entrance. The game was just stupid enough to appeal to me.

“What about when the waiter comes?” I asked, careful to keep whispering.

Jiyong pursed his lips, thinking over what sort of rules there should be. After a few seconds, he nodded.

“Okay,” he spoke even softer than before. “We must whisper when we're alone, but with others, we can speak normally.”

I nodded in agreement, “okay. Penalty for losing?”

Jiyong shrugged, “just a favor for the winner.”

I squinted at him. He looked only mischievous, not malignant. A puckish man that might play a joke but wouldn't full-on attack me.

I nodded.

“Okay,” I whispered.

=====

It was clear neither of us was planning on losing.

The meal passed quietly. The post meal drinks were near silent. The meandering walk around side streets was as hushed as a church.

“Are churches quiet?” I asked. Even my whisper sounded loud after an extended moment of silence.

“What?”

“I was just thinking that this is as quiet as being in church,” I shrugged, “but I don't go to church. So I don't know if that's true or not.”

He hummed, thinking it over before answering.

“It depends on the church,” Jiyong explained, “and what part of the service it is.”

That made enough sense. There were about four thousand different flavors of church. Some were bound to be silent.

I let maybe two more minutes of quiet pass before whispering again.

“I don't think either of us is going to give up on this bet.”

Jiyong stopped walking. His hands were clasped behind his back, and he was nodding slowly. He pursed his lips as he watched me stop and turn to face him.

“I think you're right,” he softly agreed.

“Should we call it a draw?”

Tilting his head, that mischievous grin spread across his face once more.

I squinted at him, waiting for his answer.

Staring at each other, I couldn't help but think of the silly editing that would no doubt happen for this moment. The thought made it difficult to resist glancing at the staff member holding a camera.

“No,” Jiyong whispered.

A split second later, he darted towards me. He wrapped his arms around my waist and lifted. Spinning once, he set me down with a victorious look on his face.

“That's not fair!” I complained, “you surprised me! Squealing doesn't count!”

“But you're not whispering now either.”

“You cheated!” I forced myself back to a whisper as I protested.

“This would have gone on forever if I didn't do something.”

He leaned forward, tilting his head with that practiced cuteness that all idols have. Camera training on bold display.

Camera… right.

I pulled away from him, smoothing out my outfit.

“Alright,” I said. My normal speaking tone still sounded so loud, but I ignored that. “What do you want for winning?”

Jiyong hummed, dramatically drawing the droning sound on. He took a step away from me in the direction we had been walking.

“You didn’t have anything planned?”

He turned to face me again, holding his hand out towards me.

I paused, just long enough to make him speak up again.

“Hold my hand while we walk.”

“Is that your request?”

Jiyong laughed, dropping his hand for a moment while he shook his head.

“It is a request, but not my prize,” he lifted his hand again, “will you humor me while I think?”

=====

My hand was still in his when we arrived back at the house.

I went to drop the hold when we approached the door, which, of course, only spurred him to grip my hand tighter.

“Wait,” he tugged me back from the door, to the side of the front stoop with a little less light.

“What?”

The rest of the walk until now had been quiet. It had been nice. I had asked a few times about what he wanted, but he had only said that he was thinking and would tell me when we got back to the house.

And here we were.

Jiyong dropped my hand, but only so he could quickly unplug both of our lapel mics.

“Ji-yah…”

He shook his head slightly, fingers quickly tugging the batteries out of the mic-packs.

Once he was satisfied with our relative privacy, he turned to face me. He tucked both of my hands into his own. Clearly, he wasn’t above pleading.

“Sleep with me.”

I felt my face twitch, opening my mouth to say… something.

“Not like that!” Jiyong quickly defended himself.

I narrowed my eyes but waited for him to explain himself.

“I just mean…” a less confident man would have stammered, “like before.”

I thought back, remembering falling asleep on his chest at the hotel. It had been nice, feeling the rise and fall of his body as he breathed slowly next to me on those few nights. Still…

“We’ve talked about this.”

For a moment, just long enough to make it impossible to brush off as nothing, anger rolled over his face. His hands, still gripping my own, tightened.

I could feel the pace of my heart pick up, my nerves tingling with alertness. With fear. I opened my mouth, unsure what was going to come out.

“Oppa…”

It wasn't a word I used often. I knew that many men disliked the way it sounded on a foreigner's tongue and that some others liked it a bit too much. But at that moment, I only remembered that it was the only way I could break my ex out of his ramping anger. My chest tightened, waiting, hoping, for it to have a similar effect on Jiyong.

It did its work.

My hands were dropped, and that look on his face quickly transformed into a much more familiar one of regret.

“My love…”

“I'll go in first.”

I couldn't let him talk. He was too good at talking. I knew he was. Given the time to talk, he'd convince me. By appealing to pity, sympathy, or something else, he would convince me. So, I pushed past him and made my way inside.

=====

There were some bodies in the common areas of the house, but I didn't take enough notice of them to match them to names. Within thirty seconds, I was pushing my bedroom door shut and locking it for good measure.

Then there was nothing. My body still wanted to run, but there was nowhere else to go. This was the safest place that was immediately available. There was a locked door between me and everyone else.

I glanced at the sliding glass door.

Scrambling over the bed, not taking the two extra seconds to simply walk around it, I rushed to make sure that it was locked as well. For extra security, I pulled the curtains shut tightly.

One locked door in either direction. I was invisible.

It still didn't feel like enough.

Which was how I found myself, fully clothed, sitting in the center of the giant tub. It was empty. But the bathroom provided an additional locked door, and something about the tub created a feeling of security.

I pulled out my phone and stared at it. Soo-ah would answer, but would she understand? Mino would definitely answer and probably offer to come get me - regardless of if it causes more problems later on. Seunghyun… were we really close enough for me to call him about being scared of one of his members? Would Daesung be able to resist telling the others what happened?

Shaking slightly, I kept running through possible contacts for a few minutes before finally deciding.

The phone rang through to voicemail.

“Damn it.”

I hung up, slouching over until my head hit the bottom of the tub.

Who else? There had to be someone else that I hadn't thought of yet.

My phone rang, surprising me so badly that I fell over from my kneeling position. Without even looking at the caller ID, I picked up.

“Hello?”

“Who are we damning?”

[bornfreeone-kiss]

2NE1 CONCERT [WELCOME BACK] IN SEOUL (OCT 4-6, 2024)

[one-time-i-dreamt]

Had a dream that someone made one of those fancam edits on Twitter for former Big Bang's T.O.P (Choi Seunghyun) with Käärijä's Cha Cha Cha as background music, ahead of the release of Squid Game season 2 in which Seunghyun has been cast.

[kamitrendz]

Links 👆. Squid Game 2 Smile winter gift ideas from the Squid Game Redbubble collection by @KamiTrendz on @redbubble approved by @Netflix. @redbubbleartists #squidgame #netflix #hwangdonghyuk #leejungjae #top #choiseunghyun #joyuri #parksunghoon #yimsiwan #ttt #rohjaewon #gookheechae #seonggihun #thanos #kimjunhee #parkgyuyoung #songjiwoo #fanart #merch #thriller #stickers #kamitrendz #onsale

[jiyongssi]

BigBang song of the week 💥

[moonbeesstuff]

tired of people acting like bigbang only have 2 songs

[berfgrimm]

staring at the sun | choi seunghyun (t.o.p) x reader

pairing: choi seunghyun (t.o.p) x f!reader

warnings: smut, fluff, sneaking around, hair pulling, pet names, dirty talk, a smidge of self doubt sprinkled around.

note: this is my take on combining a few requests i got, because i got inspired from a couple of edits i saw on tiktok and listening to a tvotr song. i tried writing this a little differently than I normally write, and i had this vision of ‘deleted or extended scenes’ of certain moments described here, which is something i’ve never done before. maybe it’s silly, but if you guys like this then I’ll expand on those scenes and give you some more from this story’s universe. also don’t chat to me about this being pink hair era, it is my favorite so maybe I’ll be writing about it the most. so what. anyway, enjoy!

———————

The first time you kissed Seunghyun was an accident — well, maybe not an accident, because he intended to kiss you, but it certainly was unexpected. It was in the middle of one of the band’s performances when the boys stepped off the stage for a brief break in between songs, and as a stagehand, you were responsible for the hydration of Seunghyun that night. You waited for him at the stage exit, two bottles of water in your hands and a welcoming smile on your face.

When he walked towards you, there was a frenzied look in his eyes; not panicked, but more energized, wired from the show. As much as he likes to keep a stoic demeanor about him during most performances, you know he adores what he does. It brings him a joy that you seldom see in people, and it makes you both jealous and grateful that he’s able to feel such satisfaction — he deserves it.

Seunghyun had a determined walk that night to go along with his intensity, like he couldn’t wait to get off of the stage because he had to do something. You held the bottles towards him as he neared, smiling still. He stopped too close to you, that was the first thing you noticed. You didn’t have a problem with him being in your personal space, not in the general sense of the word anyway. It was more of a disadvantage, maybe a hindrance — you couldn’t operate at 100% with him that close.

It would happen each time Seunghyun even brushed you as he tried to walk by, or when he gave you the friendliest of touches. Your skin would flush, your breath would catch in your throat, and you’d find it hard to even speak. That night was no different, if possible, it was even worse. Not only was he standing in your space, you could feel the heat radiating off of him, he was so close.

“How is it?” he asked, taking a water from your grasp and twisting the cap off. He threw his head back to take a large glug of water; you couldn’t help but fixate on the sweat on his skin, and his throat as he swallowed. Your mouth went dry at the sight. “Well?” You hadn’t realized he was finished with the bottle and was focused on you again, a faint grin on his lips. You couldn’t answer him, your words were caught in your throat and the more he stared at you, the worse it got.

That’s when he leaned towards you, stooping just enough to dip his head closer. The moment felt almost cinematic. The buzz from the fans that still cheered on the other side of the curtain, the bright lights that shone from every direction, the way he paused just before his lips met yours. When you let out a shuddered breath and leaned closer to him, Seunghyun took the hint, and closed the distance between you.

The kiss was soft and quick, just a peck, before he pulled back to look into your eyes. You don’t remember what face you made in response, but it was enough for Seunghyun to place his hand on your hip, gently pushing you backwards until your back hit a wall. You were out of view of anyone who would have walked by, secluded yet surrounded by thousands of people. This time when he kissed you, he was pressed against you harder, more intensely.

He didn’t kiss you like he was frantic, or he needed it, but instead like he was curious, almost scientific. He admitted later that he was nervous but you didn’t get that sense at the time. He didn’t even act like he enjoyed it, and before you knew it, the kiss was done and he was needed back on stage. He took the other water bottle from your hand and was gone before you uttered a word. You were confused to say the least.

Seunghyun didn’t talk to you about it afterwards. The band had another show the following night, and when you stood in the same spot, two more bottles in your hands, you were nervous. As he walked in your direction, you were certain you’d pass out from the way your heart pounded in your chest, but thankfully, your feet were firmly planted.

This time, when he reached you, Seunghyun once again drank a whole bottle of water before planting another kiss on your lips. Since it was a different venue than the night before, the secluded space you shared was no longer an option. Instead, he backed you against a stack of trunks, one hand on your hip to pin you in place.

In the moment, you weren’t sure if it was some sort of fantasy that your brain was making you believe was reality. There’s no way that this highly sought after man would be kissing you in private during his shows. It didn’t make sense. But the kiss was different this time, as he slipped his tongue into your mouth to deepen it briefly. Before you could fully enjoy the kiss, it was over again, and he left you standing alone in seclusion.

That was the start of a tradition. Each night, during their very brief intermission, Seunghyun would meet you backstage and hide behind anything nearby so you could kiss. It was sneaky and clandestine, and it gave you a knot in your stomach each time.

It took you until the fifth night for you to put your hands on him — both hands set simply on his hips; until then, you’d stayed still, too worried that if you tried to touch him, it would spoil the moment. Seunghyun told you later that he felt the same way, overthinking the moments and thinking that if he touched you too much or said anything about it, you wouldn’t want to kiss him anymore.

By the eighth night of kissing in secret, you felt something switch inside of you, and when you put your hands on his hips, you slid them up his body, feeling the heat of his skin under his sweat soaked shirt. You vividly recall the way you could feel his heart pounding as you pressed your hands flat against his chest. He responded by wrapping his arm around your waist, pulling you closer to him.

That night, when Seunghyun pulled away from you, that same switch inside of you drove you to grab his belt buckle and pull him in for one last quick kiss. As your lips were connecting, you could see a very small amused smirk on Seunghyun’s lips — at least he wasn’t mad.

Two weeks of kissing and gentle, explorative touching backstage at concerts. Away from your secret rendezvous, you had initially not treated each other any differently; friendly, joking, cordial. But at the end of week two, you started to notice the looks Seunghyun would give you when no one else was looking, along with the way he seemed to linger in your personal space. That made you more nervous than the kissing did.

“Why do you stare at me when the guys aren’t looking?” you asked him one night while he was kissing you. It made him stop altogether, peering into your eyes breathlessly. You were momentarily worried that you’d spoiled it by asking, as neither of you spoke during these moments before. It took him a few seconds of thought before he could answer, during which your eyes didn’t leave his face.

“I want to kiss you all the time,” he admitted. “I think about it whenever you’re around. Sometimes when you’re not.” You blushed, not expecting the softness and candor in his response. “This is my favorite part of each night,” he added.

“Can I tell you a secret?” you asked. Seunghyun nodded, staring directly at your mouth as he waited for you to continue. “I really like doing this in secret,” you began, feeling your nerves spread through your whole body. “It’s sexy.”

You’d never forget the glint in his eyes when you said it, excited and something almost devious. You wished you could have a picture of the way he looked at you, but it ingrained itself in your memory anyway. He looked like he was overcome with desire, for you.

The signal for him to return to stage came far too soon after that. He didn’t get to truly respond to what you had said, but he told you later that it was all he could think about for the rest of the night. You agreed with him, remembering the way that you trembled with excitement at what could come of the conversation.

The next night of the tour something changed. It wasn’t ideal to say the least. One of the other stagehands said they wanted to switch positions, and of course, your manager agreed to the change. You didn’t have time to tell Seunghyun of the change ahead of time, but you still tried to make yourself visible when he exited the stage.

The obvious look of disappointment and confusion on his face would have been funny if you didn’t feel the same way. He had glanced beyond the other stagehand to where you stood, mindlessly rolling up some cables, staring directly at him. He changed the look on his face quickly, shifting back to the stoic persona he usually presented, and acted as though nothing was wrong.

Later that night, after the show ended, you wandered through the corridors of the venue, making sure all of the leftover equipment had been gathered. You were so focused on the task, you didn’t hear Seunghyun sneaking up behind you, so you let out a surprised yelp when he grabbed you and pulled you into a nearby utility closet.

It was pitch black in the room, but you could tell it was him. His breathing, his smell, his energy, it was all around you and as you felt the warmth of his body closing in on you, all you could do was throw your arms around his neck to pull him in.

It was the first time he touched you. Like really touched you. You didn’t miss the slight tremble in his hand as it slid up your stomach, stopping just as his fingertips touched your breast. His hesitancy to not cross a line is what made you feel empowered; you took hold of his hand that barely teased your breast and dragged just a little higher to press his palm against you. He took the hint and wrapped his fingers around it, squeezing gently.

“I hated not being able to kiss you earlier,” he admitted, kissing your cheek as he held you close.

“I got reassigned.”

“I’ll take care of that.”

The way Seunghyun said it, without a single shred of uncertainty, because he knew whatever he would say to the team would happen…the power that he had…

You kissed him again, so worked up with excitement, you bit his lip. Not too hard, but enough to make him chuckle into your mouth. You didn't realize right away, not until he let out a moan, but your hand had worked its way down to touch him through his pants. You worried for a moment that you crossed a line but he was already getting hard before you touched him.

“Is this how you want our first time to be?” Seunghyun asked, kissing your neck as he ground himself against your hand. “In a utility closet? In the dark?”

“You can have me wherever you want me.”

“But you love the secrecy,” he teased. “You love hiding but you love the thought of being caught. You love being my secret, don’t you, princess?”

“I do,” you admitted. Seunghyun let out a soft gasp, a little rumble of that deep voice, as he pressed a kiss to your temple.

“You’re a good girl,” he said, gently. “But we don’t have time to do this here.” You were disappointed, of course, but you knew he was right. You had a job to do and it would be suspicious for him to be missing for too long. “We have two days off of the tour next week,” he continued. “In Melbourne. We’ll get a hotel.”

“Okay,” you replied, breathless from excitement.

“I’ll make sure you’re back in your regular assignment, as well,” he added. “I won’t be able to handle not kissing you for a week. I love being able to see you like that every night.”

You’d never expected Seunghyun to be so open to admit what could be perceived as weakness. He always came across very closed off, and protective of his emotions around most people apart from his fellow bandmates — even then, he didn’t seem quite as open.

The next several days seemed to drag on forever as you waited to have alone time with Seunghyun. Still, you had your stolen glances and private make out sessions every night, each kiss more desperate than the last, hands moving heavier with more determination.

The last show before the two day break, Seunghyun unbuttoned your jeans and began to slide his hand into your panties. You tensed, and he froze, panic spreading across his face, thinking he crossed a line. You stared into each other’s eyes and his hand stayed just barely past the elastic of your panties, unsure of what to do. You nodded slowly to give him permission to continue, and then you lowered your gaze to watch between your bodies as his hand traveled deeper into your panties.

You could recall that first sensation when his fingers, surprisingly cold, gently touched your folds. He didn’t tease you, no, there wasn’t enough time and you were so close to your hotel date so he wouldn’t do it just yet. Instead he made sure his fingers were wet with your juices before he pulled back, sliding his fingers into his mouth as he kept his gaze on you.

You worried you’d faint from the sight of him savoring your taste, but he gave you a wink, and headed back to the stage before you had the opportunity to even respond. Seunghyun told you later that he could taste you on his lips and tongue for the rest of the show, and that he had to focus not to get hard in front of everyone. You told him that you could feel his cold, soft fingers touching you for the rest of the night, and that you would let him fuck you on stage if that was what he wanted to do. He blushed but you could tell he definitely envisioned it.

You weren’t sure what to expect when it came to being alone in a hotel with Seunghyun, so your mind came up with hundreds of different scenarios that could potentially play out. During your secret rendezvous with him, he was tender for the most part, with the occasional moment of audacity like when he touched you between your thighs.

The first time you had sex with Seunghyun was gentle, the kind of thing you feel like you’d read in a romance novel. There wasn’t a lot of talking apart from the occasional soft whispers of encouragement from him, but your head was too foggy for you to even think of anything else to do except breathe and whimper. You would have been embarrassed by how composed he was compared to you, but you knew he wouldn’t want you to think that way.

You stayed tangled together in bed for what felt like hours after, telling stories of your lives and dreams for the future. As you listened to him open up to you, telling you about all of his hopes and dreams and demons, all you wanted was to kiss him and hold him for the rest of your life. But maybe that wasn’t what he wanted from you.

“Is this it?” you asked him, trying to make your voice stronger than you felt. “After today, are we back to the way things were?”

“Is that what you want?”

“No, not at all,” you said, earnestly.

“Neither do I.”

Things changed from that moment onward, the start of your relationship with Seunghyun. You both agreed that it would be best to keep it between the two of you as long as you could, not ready to deal with the attention of his fans or his bandmates. Beyond that, sneaking around was still so fucking hot.

Once, Taeyang almost caught you. The group had a performance at an award show in Japan that your team wasn't required for. After several days of rehearsals and fittings during which you spent no time together, you finally found a brief moment, maybe ten minutes of time, where Seunghyun wasn’t being pulled in a million different directions. He gave you a quick nod towards the bathrooms, and you knew what he was suggesting.

It was an individual bathroom, no stalls. You snuck inside first, staying at the far side of the room to wait for him to join you. Only a few minutes went by before he finally entered the room, hurriedly locking the door and moving towards you.

“I missed you,” he breathed, crashing his lips into yours for a kiss that he clearly had been waiting too long for. You grabbed his hips and pulled him against you, longing to feel his body again. “Being around you and not being able to touch you like I want to,” he began, kissing along your neck. “Drives me crazy. I don’t know how I’ll manage the next few days not being able to see you.”

You slid your hand to the back of his head, your fingers threading through his short hair, to guide him to a spot on your neck that you love when he kisses. His hands grabbed your sides hard, pinning you to the wall and keeping you in place to grind himself against you.

���Don’t get too worked up,” you warned. “We won’t have time for me to get you off, baby. And I’ve been wanting it so bad, I’ve been dreaming about it. You can’t leave me hungry for you like that.” Seunghyun bit your neck, sucking harder on your skin, clearly trying to leave a mark. “Are you trying to claim me?” you asked, tugging on his hair to get a groan from him. “You want them to see that I already belong to someone?”

“I want you to remember it,” he muttered against your skin. “When I can’t be with you in the next few days, I want you to look in the mirror and see this mark so you’ll remember the way that only I know how to make you feel.”

That was the first time he showed his possessive side, and you were elated. You wanted to return the favor, maybe scratch up his back or his chest to give him something to think about while you weren’t near him but you worried that would be the fastest way to get caught. Sure, Seunghyun seldom showed much skin to anyone, but you knew that his friends enjoyed teasing and pranking one another, which has previously included sneaking pictures of one another while in compromising situations — like in the shower.

The knock on the bathroom door scared you both, and Taeyang’s voice made you even more terrified. All you could do was stare at one another with panic in your eyes.

“Hey, man, we have to leave soon for the next fitting,” Tae called out, knocking again. “Then to the airport for the flight.”

“Okay,” Seunghyun replied, hoping it would be sufficient.

“Are you alright?” came Tae’s response, and she shook the door handle as if he wanted to get in the room. “You sound odd.”

“Be out in a minute.” Seunghyun sounded as irritated as he looked, but thankfully, Tae took the hint and you heard his footsteps retreating. Seunghyun put his hands on the wall on either side of you, looking at you, discouraged. “Text me every time you think of me,” he said. “Especially if it’s dirty.”

“That will be a lot of messages,” you admitted, which made him grin.

“You think about me that much?” he inquired and you nodded, transfixed on his mouth. “Good. Give me details, so I know what my girl daydreams of me doing to her. I’ll miss you.” You make sure to give him another kiss, knowing you won’t see him for several days. “Stay here for a minute after I leave,” he directed. “I’ll make sure no one is around.”

Seunghyun exited first, casually to not draw attention. You counted to thirty before you made your exit, thankfully no one was in sight to be any the wiser.

You sent him fifteen texts that day, which was showing a tremendous amount of restraint compared to how frequently you actually thought of him. Your mind was almost entirely on him from the moment he left your side: sweet thoughts of how you’d love to hold his hand and walk through a market together, tender thoughts of kissing endlessly in his bed, filthy thoughts that you refused to elaborate on via text message but you made sure he knew you needed him in every imaginable way.

That night was the first time you had phone sex with Seunghyun. You couldn’t make it twenty four hours without each other. The sound of Seunghyun trying to keep his moans to a reasonable volume to not get caught by his bandmates in the next room was something you’d think about forever; you wished you could record the sound in your mind and play it whenever you wanted. The slightly static and muffled distortion of his voice coming through the phone somehow made his voice deeper, and when he told you what he would have done to you if you were there with him that night, you switched to a video call so he could watch you touch yourself.

You slowly found out about each other’s kinks. He liked watching you touch yourself because if anyone knew what you liked the most, it would be you. He also liked being called ‘baby’, and having his hair pulled. You told him you liked being more submissive, and you especially enjoyed dirty talk. He said he liked lingerie, the lacy kind, and he ended up buying you three different sets to wear for him. Though you were most nervous to admit this one, and you tried to avoid it altogether, you told him the contact lenses and costume for ‘Bae Bae’ were sexy.

“I’ll wear them for you one day,” he promised. “But you’d better be a dirty girl for me if I do, princess.” You tried to hide your excitement and embarrassment, but Seunghyun saw it immediately. “I love when you get shy,” he smirked, stealing a gentle kiss.

“I love everything you do,” you responded.

The first time you both actually said ‘I love you’ was during one of the intermissions about two months after you started your relationship. You both admitted later that you felt it much earlier on than that, but didn’t want to pressure the other.

Seunghyun said it first. The roles were slightly reversed from usual, as he was the one pressed back against the wall with your hands touching his body over his shirt. Your mouth was leaving a wet trail of kisses along his sharp jawline, tasting the sweat on his skin. His hands were on your backside, pulling you against him hard, letting you work your magic on him.

“I love you,” he whispered, pressing a kiss below your ear then resting his head against yours. You stopped kissing his neck, staying in place, breathing slowly as you let the words sink in. “Is that okay?” he questioned, his hands shifting to your hips now, rubbing soothingly.

“More than okay,” you whispered, nudging your head against his gently. “I love you, too.”

Seunghyun let out a small, excited yell in response to your words, roughly wrapping his arms around you and spinning you both in a circle. You laughed along with him holding on tight as he got out his excited response.

“I knew it, princess. You can’t get enough of me.”

“That’s funny, coming from you,” you retorted, playfully shoving him against the wall again and standing in front of him, both of your hands pressed to his chest. “I’m so fucking in love with you,” you whispered, wistfully.

Seunghyun gave you one last passionate kiss before he had to go back onto the stage. He told you later he felt like it was the best performance he ever gave because he couldn’t stop thinking about how much love was in your eyes when you looked at him.

When Jiyong almost caught you, it was enough to cause you and Seunghyun to have a conversation about the future of your relationship. It was after a show, when Daesung asked you to join the guys and a few others to go to a club. Ordinarily, you would have refused as you didn’t spend a lot of time clubbing, but when you glanced past Daesung towards Seunghyun, you noticed the hopeful look on his face — so you agreed. Maybe the night would give you an opportunity to dance with Seunghyun.

What you hadn’t thought of, however, was what happened a couple of hours before, during your intermission make out session. You decided to tempt Seunghyun, just a little bit, and you wore a skirt. You knew immediately that it worked, because his hands were under your skirt, groping your thighs, as soon as his body touched yours.

The issue was that you had slipped your panties off and handed them to him just before he went back on stage; hot pink panties from a set he had bought. You could see the surprise on his face initially, but his expression changed to something different, more intense. He shoved the clothing into the pocket of his jacket, swooping back towards you for another kiss before he went back to the stage. He told you later that it was one of the sexiest things you ever did, and that he tried to think of a way to do something similar for you, but he didn’t think handing you his briefs would have the same impact.

Fast forward to the club, when Seunghyun took his jacket off and draped it over his seat, only to have your panties fall from his pocket to the floor. Neither of you noticed it until Jiyong spoke.

“Lose something?” he laughed.

“Huh?” Seunghyun asked, prompting Jiyong to point to the clothing on the floor. Your heart leapt to your throat and you were thankful that the lights were low in the club so no one could see the look of shock and embarrassment on your face.

“Pink to match your hair, is that it?” Jiyong teases, taking a sip of his drink. Seunghyun scooped the panties up from the ground, stuffing them into the pocket of his pants this time.

“Caught them on stage,” he explained casually, sitting down again.

“And you decided to carry them with you after you changed clothes,” Jiyong continued, a smirk on his lips as he watched Seunghyun for any signs of deception.

“You don’t have to act so jealous because you didn’t catch any,” Seunghyun responded, a sly smirk on his lips. Jiyong laughed at his friend’s response.

“That’s a shame — I thought you’d finally found someone willing to put up with all of your quirks.” Seunghyun didn’t need to respond, and he told you later that if he didn’t relent when he did, Jiyong would have kept pushing until he figured out your secret.

The best moment of the night was dancing with Seunghyun. Even when you were just friends, you didn’t share a dance together, so you weren’t aware of how good it felt to slow dance and grind with him. To make sure no suspicions were raised, you danced with the others as well, and even though Seunghyun agreed it would be a good idea, you could tell he hated to watch it happen.

Later that night, Seunghyun sent you a video of him, a little tipsy from the drinks that night, and a little frustrated from the lack of time spent with you. He spoke deeper than normal, trying to avoid being heard by anyone through the walls.

“I didn’t like their hands on you,” he muttered. “Touching you like they had the right. It makes me crazy not being able to touch you when I want, princess.” He sounded needy in a way you hadn’t heard from him before, and it made you wish he was with you in your room right then.

It wasn’t until the next day that you had a few moments to spare together where Seunghyun asked you if you were serious about him. You were frustrated with the question at first until you realized why he was asking: you two were getting closer to being caught, and he wanted to save you from the relentless teasing and jokes you’d be subjected to once the others found out. You told him you didn’t care and you loved him, so that was all that mattered. You’d enjoy sneaking around while you still could.

The first time you played a prank on him wasn’t your choice. Daesung and Jiyong talked you into it, because they knew that Seunghyun would expect strange behavior from them during a prank war. You were an objective third party as far as they knew, and you thought going along with their plan would be the best way to keep the heat off of you.

You didn’t think it was a great idea because you knew how much Seunghyun didn’t enjoy showing off his body, but Daesung convinced you to steal Seunghyun’s clothes while he was in the shower. You agreed, and before you knew it, you found yourself sneaking into the shower room in search of his clothes. Until he caught you, all of his clothes bunched up in your hands while he stood opposite you with a towel around his waist.

“You turned on me, princess?” he asked, putting his hands on his hips. “You joined their team?”

“It’s just…for fun,” you explained, cheeks flushing.

“Are you blushing because you’ve been caught or because you want me to drop the towel?” He stalked towards you, and you weren’t sure if you wanted to run away or run closer. “Both?” he smirked.

“Maybe a little,” you mumbled.

“Take the clothes,” he nodded, finally in front of you. “I’ll make a big scene about it, don’t worry. But tonight, I want you to come by my hotel room, and you can pay me back.” He stole a quick kiss from you before gently shoving you in the direction of the exit.

You both acted perfectly together, convincing the other guys that you had pranked him. They laughed uncontrollably as Seunghyun cursed them for talking you into a stupid prank war. After you finally relented and returned his clothes, he spared a quick glance to the others to make sure they weren’t looking when he whispered in your ear.

“My room later,” he said. “You owe me.”

He got you off four times that night before he let you relax. It was a new record for both of you.

The next day was the first time one of the guys suggested Seunghyun ask you out. You weren’t around when it happened, working elsewhere in the arena setting up for the rehearsal, but Seunghyun was practically giddy when he told you later.

From Seunghyun’s retelling of the conversation, Tae was the first to bring it up, mentioning that he could see a spark between the two of you at the club. Jiyong agreed but Daesung mentioned that he felt he had more of a chance with you than Seunghyun did.

“Dae would be my second choice,” you joked with Seunghyun, and thankfully, he laughed in response.

According to Seunghyun, he played the whole thing as casually as possible. At first he denied that there was any sort of spark between you, and then he allowed his friends to make him see it. Still, he shrugged it off, saying he didn’t have time for a relationship. By the end of the conversation, he seemingly dissuaded them of the notion altogether.

“I don’t think I’m ready to tell them,” he admitted. “It’s fun sneaking around, and I’m happy being private. Besides, that’s one step closer to the rest of the world finding out. I don’t want you to face them until you’re ready.”

It was sweet how he wanted to protect you, but you felt in a certain part of your mind that maybe he wasn’t ready to tell the world because he wasn’t proud of you. It was a silly notion, and you knew from the way he looked at you that he would do anything for you, just as you would for him. Still, you couldn’t help but hear that small whisper of doubt if you thought too hard about your relationship.

The whisper got softer, and eight months into your still secret relationship with Seunghyun, you couldn’t hear it at all anymore. The tour had ended and you were able to spend more time together without as much worry of being caught. You spent most of your days in his apartment, sometimes yours, watching movies together or staying in bed. You were sometimes treated to the sight of Seunghyun at his desk, writing new music; you think those were your favorite days.

It all brings you to this moment right now. You’re tangled up in the sheets of Seunghyun’s bed, on your back with your hips at the edge, while he’s knelt on the floor with his head between your legs. He has your thighs spread wide for him, pinned down against the bed so he can get at you without issue.

“Fuck, baby,” you moan, fisting his hair to hold him in place where he sucks on your clit. “That feels so good, please don’t stop.”

“Mhm,” he hums against you, and you’re sure you can feel him smirking. He thrusts his fingers into you faster, sensing that you’re close from the way you’re squeezing and grinding against him. “Good girl,” he breathed into you. “Come for me, baby.”

Every time Seunghyun makes you come, it feels better than the last. Your body trembles and you moan out his name so much and so hard, you feel like you’ll lose your voice. This time is no different, and you ride out each and every wave of your orgasm, then dropping back into the sheets, panting.

“I’ll never get tired of the way that sounds,” Seunghyun says, licking the taste of you from his lips and fingers. “You, calling my name, breathing like you’re desperate for air. You’re so beautiful.” You reach towards him, cupping his face with both hands and urging him closer to you. He grins up at you, climbing on top of you on the bed to kiss you passionately.

You’re both so lost in the feeling of one another you don’t hear the front door of the apartment open, and you didn’t hear your friends talking idly while they changed their shoes in the entryway. If you had overheard them, you would have had more time to cover yourselves up or even hide before they entered the bedroom.

“Oh, damn!” Jiyong exclaims, laughing. “I’m sorry!” He covers his eyes and turns from the doorway, but is quickly joined by his two other bandmates who are hurrying to peer into the room.

“No way!” Daesung laughs.

“I knew it,” Tae laughs.

“Fucking go!” Seunghyun yells, pointing at them with one hand as he tries to help you cover yourself with a sheet. “Have some respect!” The other three men almost fall over one another as they scramble from the room, still in a fit of excited laughter. “I’m so sorry,” Seunghyun says, softly, as he turns to check on you. “Are you okay? I didn’t know they were coming over.”

“It’s okay,” you nod, your cheeks still flushed in embarrassment. “I guess the truth is out now.”

“So much for privacy,” he chuckles, grasping your jaw tenderly and pulling you towards him for a kiss. “I’m sorry, princess. If you go get cleaned up, I’ll talk to those idiots, and try to calm them down before you come out there.”

“Okay,” you smile. “I love you.”

“I love you, too,” he replies. You smile, tossing the blanket from your body and moving to stand up from the bed. “Wait,” Seunghyun says, catching your hips, and pulling you to stand in front of where he sits on the edge of the bed. “I’m not upset that they know. I’ll miss sneaking around because it was sexy…but at least we can be open about it. And we can start moving you in here tomorrow.”

“That’s how you ask me to move in with you?” you chuckle, putting your hands on his shoulders.

“You love it here,” he responds, one of his hands slipping between your thighs, touching your still wet and tender folds. “I‘ll be able to touch you anytime you want me to. And we both know…you always want me to touch you.”

“Mmm,” you hum, closing your eyes and letting out a soft sigh. “Maybe. But I’m not going to let you finger me while your friends are in the other room.” Seunghyun laughs, removing his hand from between your legs and making sure you look at him before he slips his fingers into his mouth to clean them.

“Go clean up,” he commands, gesturing to the bathroom. “If I get them to leave before you’re out, I’m coming in there and fucking you in the shower.” You laugh, playfully slapping his shoulder.

“Don’t make a promise that you don’t intend to keep.”

“Oh, you doubt me?” he laughs. “Now I’ll have them out of here in sixty seconds, so you’d better be in that shower waiting for me. Or else you’ll be in trouble.” You wish you could identify what it was about Seunghyun threatening you like this that set your inside alight with arousal, but you figure that’s an internal conversation for another time. “Go now,” he says, smacking you on your backside. “Be a good girl and listen to what I told you.”

As you enter the bathroom, you feel an excitement radiating through you unlike you’d felt before at the thought of being in a relationship with Seunghyun. Now that the truth is out, the possibilities are endless. And the likelihood of Seunghyun keeping his promise to meet you in the bathroom is now a certainty as he stands in the doorway, thirty seconds faster than he had predicted.

[lilou0401]

Choi Seunghyun, let's not fall in love

Choi Seunghyun x fem!reader

Summary: G-Dragon's younger sister struggles to escape his shadow, yearning to be known for herself rather than as "his little sister." Her life becomes more complicated when she falls for his best friend, T.O.P, a charming gentleman she knows she can't have. The emotional tension peaks when she watches the band rehearse "Let's Not Fall in Love," a song that mirrors her forbidden feelings.

Warnings: a bit angst

Masterlist

You have always lived in his shadow. Being G-Dragon’s little sister isn’t as glamorous as people think- it’s a title you never wanted. To everyone else, you're just "his little sister," nothing more. No matter how hard you try to make a name for yourself, you're always overlooked.

You had to expect that he hardly has any time left, or that people would take pictures of you and follow you, but worst of all, that girls would try to suck up to you just to get closer to him. You've already lost so many friends because of this and it was exhausting.

But what made it worse was him- Choi Seunghyun. Your brother’s best friend. He’s kind, charming, a true gentleman… and completely off-limits. Yet, no matter how hard you tried, you couldn't stop your heart from betraying you.

You hated yourself for it. For the way your chest tightened every time he smiled at you. For the way you catched yourself stealing glances when he was not looking. And for the way you imagined, just for a second, what it would be like if things were different.

But they were not. He was your brother’s best friend, part of the world you have been desperately trying to step out of. Falling for him wasn’t just wrong, it was impossible. You knew that.

But you still couldn't help but be proud of your brother, he has achieved so much in his life and he has done so with a lot of hard work. He and his friends have managed to grow together and they now called themselves Bigbang. You really had respect for them and had supported your brother all the way to this point, even if it meant suffering yourself. But there were also good things, you were invited to each of their concerts without having to pay anything, you were allowed to stand in the front row, and you were also allowed to watch them at practice and even give tips.

And that was exactly what you were planning to do, your BMW turned into the narrow street of the studio's driveway. To the left and right stood men in suits, shoulders broad, and serious looks. They nodded at you as you drove between them to your personal parking space that your brother had organized for you. The tires rubbed against the pebbles as you came to a stop, perfectly parked in the space.

Your eyes briefly wandered to your rearview mirror to check your lip gloss and mascara before you opened the car door, slipping out. You slammed the black car door behind you shut before you made your way to the entrance. Two more men were standing at the door, bowing to you as you smiled at them before they opened the door for you.

Gratefully, you walked past them and through the door, the cold air conditioning circling your face as you walked down the long hall to the stairs on the far right that leaded up to the studio, where your brother and the others were surely already located.

When you get to the top, you straightened your top before clearing your throat, pushing down the door handle. At first they didn't notice you and you took the opportunity to sneak in, your gaze gliding around the room. Your brother Ji-Yong stood with his back to you as he speaked to his manager, his hands moving wildly as he speaked. All the back dancers had sat down on the floor, some sipping their water bottles from time to time as they talked to each other.

Daesung was talking to a sweet looking girl who was also one of the back dancers, her hands clasped together as she told him something to which he nodded in agreement. You put your purse in the corner with the rest as your eyes wandered to the last two members of the band.

First, your eyes tried to ignore the obviously tall silhouette of the handsome man with white dyed hair as they wandered to Taeyang, who was pressing his hips against the wall, talking to the man in front of him. Although your gaze didn't even land on that person, your body seemed to have thoughts of its own, as your pulse increased in seconds and beads of sweat formed on your neck.

It felt like the walls of the studio room were getting tighter with every breath you took, almost crushing you as you looked down at the floor as soon as his head turned in your direction. Your fingers pulled through the cotton fabric of your top to distract yourself, because it felt like his eyes were drilling burning holes through your head.

"Stop panicking, he's just looking at you. Calm down, gosh." You whispered to yourself, your breath shallow as you shook your head before you looked up again, but deliberately not in his direction, but at your brother, who now also spot you. He gave you a small smile and gestured to the chair next to you for you to sit down before he turned back to his manager.

Nodding to yourself, you sit down on the chair, your body a little tense as you tuck the strands of hair that have fallen out of your high ponytail behind your ear.

"Alright let's start." Your brother's voice brought everyone out of their conversations, and immediately everyone got into position and you had to force yourself not to look in his direction, your eyes fixed on everyone else but him.

The studio was alive with music, the beat of Let’s Not Fall in Love filling every corner of the room. You leaned back against the wall, trying not to be seen, but your eyes were glued to them. To him. And you cursed yourself for not even having managed five minutes without looking at him.

Seung-hyun moved with such ease, his tall frame perfectly in sync with the others. Every step, every gesture, was deliberate yet natural, like he was born to do this. You could tell they were trying to capture the bittersweet longing of the song in their movements, the subtle push and pull, the hesitant touches that mirrored the lyrics so perfectly.

But then it happened. His eyes met yours. Just for a second, his movements faltered, barely noticeable to anyone else, but you saw it. And in that moment, it felt like the room froze. The way he looked at you, with something you couldn’t quite name, was it curiosity? Concern? Something deeper?- made your heart race.

You wanted to leave, to escape the intensity of it all, but your feet wouldn’t move. The choreography continued, each step tugging at your emotions, until you couldn’t tell where the music ended and your feelings began.

Your heart was pounding so loudly in your chest, you were sure everyone in the studio could hear it pounding. Your ears buzzed from the bass that resounded loudly through the room and a lump formed in your throat as you saw a emotion in his brown eyes, his hand holding his microphone at an angle in the air as he sang his lyrics into it, without even looking away from you.

Watching him move, his focus, his grace- it was all too much. For a moment, you thought he looked at you differently. But maybe that was just your heart playing tricks on you again.

It felt like everything you have been holding back threatened to spill over. The lyrics of the song took on another meaning, a much more serious one, and it hurt, it hurt to know that things would never work out between you.

You told yourself to look away, to break the moment before it consumed you. But you couldn’t. His gaze lingered longer than it should have before he turned back, falling back into the rhythm as if nothing had happened. Yet you knew he felt it too- the tension, the unspoken words hanging in the air.

The choreography became more intimate, the dancers moving closer, hands almost touching before pulling away. It was a perfect visual for the song’s meaning: love held at arm’s length, restrained by fear and doubt. It was heartbreak in motion, and every step felt like it was pulling you further into your own feelings for him.

You clenched your fists, trying to steady youeself. What were you even doing here? Watching him like this, torturing yourself with something that could never be. When the music stopped, the silence was deafening, and you realized you’d been holding your breath.

"Did you like it?" His voice startled me. His breathing was heavy from dancing, his dyed blond hair laid wildly on his head, he wore a blue shirt that was unbuttoned at the top and yoz noticed light eyeliner under his big eyes.

You hadn’t noticed him walking over, his face glistening with a light sheen of sweat, his usual confident demeanor softened. He wasn’t Ji-Yong's’s best friend in this moment, or a global star. He was just Seung-hyun. And that made it so much harder.

"It… it was beautiful." You stammered, your voice barely above a whisper and you scold yourself in your head for sounding so nervous

He smiled, that same warm, disarming dimple smile that always left you reeling. "Good. That’s what we’re going for."

You nodded, afraid that if you said any more, your voice might betray you. Because if he knew, if he even guessed at the feelings your were fighting so hard to hide, it would ruin everything.

There was a brief silence, your gaze on the floor, avoiding eye contact, while you still felt his eyes on your. He seemed to be analyzing you, as if he wanted to guess what you were thinking. And you prayed that he couldn't see how nervous his presence made you and how your palms were sweating, which you immediately wiped on your black leggings.

You heard him sigh softly before he sat down on the chair next to yours, his body turned sideways towards you, upper body leaning forward to be closer to you while his arm rested on the back of the chair. Your eyes widened momentarily before you forced your body to relax as you lifted your head and gave him a small smile.

His features softened as he smiled back, your eyes immediately going to his little dimple, your heart skipping a beat and you had to stop yourself from pocking it. Your mouth opened a crack before you closed it again, shaking your head, not even knowing what you wanted to say, but he seemed to do the job for you.

"You okay? You look a little uncomfortable." His voice is soft and his eyes wander down your face, searching for any discomfort. Your lips pressed together, unsure of how to respond, spreading your lip gloss accidentally. "Uhm... no, I'm fine, I'm just a little cold."

His lips curved into a smile as he watched you, his hand lifting for a moment before he slowly and carefully placed it around your chin, his thumb slowly running under your lip, his touch so gentle, and brushing away the now painted-over lip gloss from there.

Your lips parted in surprise, a shaky breath escaped you and a tingling sensation spread throughout your stomach. He paused briefly to look you in the eyes before his hand moved away and hung loosely down his side.

If you weren't mistaken, you could have sworn you saw a hint of pink on his cheeks, but you were sure your cheeks were twice as pink. He cleared his throat and with that the moment ended and you leaned back a little, your body still on fire.

Without thinking twice, his hands reached for his jacket, lined with warm fur on the inside, before he slowly placed it over your shoulders. Goosebumps spread across your arms as the fluffy fur brushed against your arms and immediately your fingers gripped the sides of his jacket so that it wouldn't slip off your shoulders when he pulled his hands back.

"There. It'll definitely keep you warm. Daesong turned on the air conditioning so we wouldn't faint from sweating during rehearsals." A short laugh escaped him, the sound music to your ears, as he leaned back in his chair, running his hand through his white hair.

"Makes sense." You replied with a grateful smile as you pulled the cozy jacket closer to you, the sweet smell of his perfume revealing your nostrils, possibly the only reason you pulled them even tighter. You would love to smell them all until his scent was the only thing your sense of smell could smell and he was the only thought in your head.

Before him or you could say anything else, one of the dancers called his name, pulling his attention back to the group. He gave you a small nod before turning away, leaving you sitting there, your heart racing and your chest tight.

You should have left then. You should’ve walked out of that studio, out of this situation, before your emotions swallowed you whole. But instead, you stayed. You watched as they started again, the music filling the space, their movements perfectly synchronized yet brimming with raw emotion.

This time, you focused on the choreography, trying to distract yourself. The way their hands reached out but never quite connected, the way their steps carried them closer only to pull them apart again- it was beautiful and devastating. It felt like a reflection of everything you were feeling, a silent reminder of the line you couldn’t cross.

But then there was Seunghyun again, moving like the song had been written for him. Every glance, every step seemed so effortless, yet you could see the focus in his expression. When he turned toward you mid-routine, his gaze landed on yours once more, and your breath caught.

It felt like he was dancing just for you.

You shook the thought away, silently scolding yourself for even thinking something so ridiculous. But when the music stopped again and the room filled with chatter and laughter, you noticed him walking back toward you.

"You’re still here, how long are you staying?" he asked, his voice low and calm. You shrugged, trying to play it off. "It’s a good song. Hard to walk away from something like that." You began, before your gaze wandered to your brother, who was laughing at something Taeyang said to him, his head thrown back, and immediately your heart sank and felt heavier, guilt for allowing yourself to think like that about Seunghyun again making its way into your chest.

"Uhm well I'm waiting for Ji-Yong, he wanted to meet me for dinner after practice." You continued while exhaling deeply as you looked up to meet his eyes and you couldn't help but want to melt at the way he looked at you.

He smiled again, but there was something different in his eyes this time, something searching. "You’ve always been honest, you know that? It’s one of the things I like about you."

Your heart skipped a beat. What was he doing? Why was he saying things like that? "Thanks, I guess." You mumbled, unsure what to think of his sentence, your head lowered again, your fingers playing with the end of your top.

A deep laugh escaped him as he tilted his head slightly to the side, his hand came up to scratch the back of his head, a habit you often noticed him doing when he was nervous. "You're welcome, I guess."

You smile uncertainly at him as you slowly stood up from the chair, his jacket slipping off your shoulders, your hands caught it before it could fall to the floor and carefully placed it around the back of your chair before you slowly intertwined your hands and turned your head to Ji-Yong, who at that very moment finished his conversation with Taeyang and made his way towards the two of you with his signature grin plastered on his face, completely unaware of the tension lingering between you two.

Your heart was still racing, but you forced a smile, hoping Ji-Yong wouldn’t notice how flustered you looked. He throwed an arm around your shoulder. "I told you we are good, didn’t I?" He gestured toward Seung-hyun and the other members, completely oblivious to the moment he had just interrupted.

"Yeah" I murmured, my voice unsteady. "You really are." A small smile graced your lips, your breath shallow as you laid your head on his shoulder.

Seung-hyun cleared his throat, his expression now calm and unreadable. "Your sister’s a good audience." he said casually, addressing Ji-Yong. "She’s honest. You don’t get that a lot." His eyes wandered down to you for a moment, a small smile on his lips as he winked at you discreetly, causing your heart to skip a beat.

Ji-Yong grinned at him, clearly amused. "That’s because she’s not afraid to call people out. Don’t let her fool you- she’s tough." I managed a small laugh, trying to keep up the facade. "I’m not that bad."

Your body stood up straight again as your brother's arm slowly slipped from your shoulders, ruffling your hair playfully, completely unaware of the tension still simmering beneath the surface. "You’re worse than you think,” he teased, turning to Seung-hyun. “But hey, at least she’s honest, right?"

Seung-hyun gave a small smile, but you noticed the way his eyes lingered on you for just a second too long. "Yeah. She is." Ji-Yong didn’t catch it—why would he? To him, this was just a casual conversation, lighthearted and harmless. But to you, every word, every glance, felt heavy with meaning.

Sighing and feigning annoyance, you hugged yourself as you stepped aside to put some distance between you and your brother. "Stop with the honest thing, you're pushing it." You murmured, hoping to distract attention from you.

"Anyway," Ji-Yong continued, as he crossed his arms in front of his chest and nudged you with his hip. "you should come by more often. You’re always saying you don’t get to see enough of what we do."

That was true, since Ji-Yong started with the songs, he was very busy and had hardly any time for anything else, including his family and that made our mom especially sad. "I might." You said softly, your mind still reeling.

Seung-hyun looked at you then, his expression unreadable but his eyes saying everything you didn’t want to hear. And as Ji-Yong continued chatting and laughing, completely unaware of the storm brewing beneath the surface, you couldn’t help but wonder how much longer you could keep pretending.

[ateez-himari]

YŪGEN; THE SHOWCASE

Korea's Tiger, Himari, has established herself as an incredible solo artist through an emotion filled concert that left the industry wanting more in the future

January 14, 2025 (6:15PM)

Insomniac is the term used in reference to individuals who often have difficulty finding sleep and has been used as the title of Himari's recently released extended play as the tracks contained in this heart breaking solo debut speak on the extensive mental health issues that have led to this condition. Undisclosed health concerns have delayed the showcase ticketing yet with the temporary conclusion of the group's Japan schedule, Jangchung Gymnasium was able to host the maknae's very first solo performance on January 13th.

Attendees immediately took to social media to inform those unable to attend that the young woman's raw stage presence left them in tears - pictures capturing the large screen uploaded later that night clearly showed those same tears almost glimmering under the bright lights rolling down her own cheeks. Himari's position as lead vocalist lets the audience hear an entrancing steadiness in her angelic voice, but through these emotional verses it went through phases that could be compared to grief; breaking, changing the flow, laced with choked back sobs, and overall heavy compared to its usual seeming weightlessness.

The lyrics are clear mirrors of memories that have broken the maknae over time as it was noticed that when the last note rang out, Himari looked emotionally drained, ending the painful stage slumped over the microphone stand with long raven black hair covering what many imagine to be a sorrowful expression. In order to lighten the heavy emotional silence settled onto the audience, the young woman interacted rather closely with attendees during the interlude prior to shedding the tear streaked clothing and performing unofficial songs that have only been released on the group's YouTube channel.

The Setlist; Intro; 00:01. Paranoia. AM 4:44. Wake Me Up (ft T.O.P). Interlude; Tear. Outro; Rockstar. Shadow. Interlude (Ment). Take Me Back To Eden. Nobody Knows (unreleased). Want (unreleased). Blinded Red (unreleased). Addict. Ending Ment

Yūgen was chosen to be the title as it is a concept that influences various Japanese arts such as performing arts, literature, painting, etc., and is widely translated into 'mysterious profundity', refering to the beauty that can be sensed in an object. It refers to the beauty which lingers with someone when coming across an art form; in this case these tracks hold such charm due to the fact that each person is able to imagine the past that has influenced these lyrics, the struggles that the vocalist went through for every note to be created.

The Industry Itself Came To Support Their Holy Maknae

Choi Seunghyun also known under the stage name T.O.P, who has not been active in the music industry since 2022 following the release of Still Life with ex-group BIGBANG, made a temporary return through their joint track. The two share none of the other's pain nor history yet the emotions conveyed through Wake Me Up resonated in their own hearts and whether this comes from the numerous weeks spent side by side is unknown, but what can be said for sure is that despite the artists having never interacted prior to this project they have created one of the most harmonious chemistries between two generations.

Taemin, the young woman's mentor of four years, was given special balcony seating which was proudly shown to fans through numerous social media posts and later endeared the internet by fawning over his precious producer after the showcase. G-Dragon on the other hand made a much more discrete appearance aside from one singular picture sharing the carefully crafted nametag attached to his headrest, many suspecting that something is amiss since the five part series 'unmute' was released as he joked that had Taemin not made her his protégée already, he would have done so.

There are certain seniors that have marked the audience at the end of the night by bowing deeply to their much younger junior as this show of respect seemed to hold so much more meaning than simple recognition; Yoongi, T.O.P, G-Dragon and Taemin. While three idols folded their bodies into ninety degree bows to convey their deep respect for the vocalist's incredible talent and likely to give their blessings towards her taking a seat alongside the history makers of the industry, her older brother was on his knees - a type of bow used to demonstrate the utmost respect or apology.

Theories have been circulating regarding the true meaning behind the rapper's gesture as he was seen in an almost grieving state during the track 'Interlude; Tear' that is speculated to discuss the maknae's destructive relationship with someone attempting to take their life - though neither of these things have been officially confirmed. It is reported that attendees seated next to the artist balcony have seen the vocalist's biological brother offering this same bow, and considering that she broke down into tears after catching sight of this there is likely burdened history between the siblings.

The Guestlist Included; ATEEZ. Stray Kids. BTS. Hanzo. Mingyu, Wonwoo, S.Coups, Hoshi, Dino and DK (SEVENTEEN). Jihyo, Momo, Sana and Jeongyeon (TWICE). Bibi. Hwasa. Minho (SHINee). Cha Eunwoo, Sanha (ASTRO). Zico. BOYNEXTDOOR. Xikers. And more

The Emotions Come Crashing Down

Limited footage showing backstage interactions with other artists have been made available to the public and as usual it was the ones between the siblings that caught the most attention, especially when netizens noted the difference between each reunion. Hanzo, who has been living in another continent due to his contract with a foreign football team, immediately engulfed the young woman in a tight embrace before spinning the two of them around with pure happiness, seemingly unable to stop himself from leaving numerous kisses on her cheeks much to his sister's whining protest. Yoongi on the other hand, who has been away to complete mandatory military service, seemed much more solemn when he wrapped strong arms around her with so much care that it would seem she would break should he hold on any tighter - letting Himari bury her unreadable face in his chest.

The maknae's bandmates made much more noise when entering the secured area, holding the cake they previously filmed themselves purchasing to show their fans adorned with sparklers that matched the bright shine in her eyes at the moment. Mingi, the lead rapper that officially revealed his romantic relationship with her last summer on accident, cradled his girlfriend's cheek, securing her smaller body with the other hand on her hip, and pressed their lips together under the loud cheers of their members. Every single one of them was wearing some semblance of merch designed at the hands of their captain, their precious youngest's name etched in some form on their outfits as each held lightsticks customized to look like tigers.

Taemin entered holding the ever so symbolic bouquet of flowers present at each of the young producer's achievements, rambling on about the pride felt throughout this showcase while petting her very disheveled hair. T.O.P was the last senior with whom interactions were shown and it seems that the artists have come to stand on close ground with one another as they too shared an, albeit somewhat brief, embrace and exchanged a few words silenced by editors with bright smiles on their features.

Xikers, despite each member being taller than the young woman, all ran to hug their producing senior and very nearly crushed her in a sea of large bodies while shouting out congratulatory words, almost forgetting to bow in their excitement until Wooyoung scolded their poor juniors. BoyNextDoor, who the vocalist has been producing for since their first extended play, were much more shy when approaching her - except for their leader who has been seeking out mentorship from their senior for some time now - and had to practically push one another to decide who was going to ask for a picture, which she signed at their request.

ATEEZ's Tiger Cub Does Not Seem So Small Anymore

Himari has been producing breathtaking tracks to be used by other artists for six years now, as even group releases showcase their vocal unity rather than each member's individual sound, and used this much more intimate venue to bare her soul to fans that have been wanting to hear her own voice since the immense success of the track 'Shadow'. The intense pain plaguing the vocalist's past was turned into shattering tracks that were perfectly delivered through hypnotizing stage presence that will likely linger in the minds of those present in the venue for the remainder of the year, and which has certainly cemented her place amongst industry royalty.

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[thisonegirl]

A lot of the fics I had saved have been deleted hence the short list (many of my favorites were among the fallen💔) but these are the surviving ones. Please recommend some fics , I’m always on the lookout for new ones.

⚠️WARNING⚠️quite a bit of these (most, if not all actually) are not safe for work content. Some are very sexually graphic. Symbols will be used to distinguish them.

main masterlist

MINORS DNI —> MOST OF THE CONTENT INCLUDED HERE IS +18 ONLY

PS : for series, I am linking my favorite part/chapter (please let me know if it would be better to link the first part or the master list if it’s available)

❤️‍🔥 - nsfw 🖤- dark ❤️‍🩹 - angst 💕- sfw 🏆- favorite

BTS

jungkook | The Six Stages Of A Breakup | series | by @jksarchives - ❤️‍🩹

jungkook | No Nut November | one shot | by @2hightocare - ❤️‍🔥

jungkook | We Can’t Be Friends | one shot | @joonberriess - ❤️‍🩹 ❤️‍🔥(it stings fr)

jungkook | Acquaintances | one shot | by @2hightocare - ❤️‍🔥

jungkook | Stay | one shot | by @jungkxook - ❤️‍🔥

jungkook | Quiet Rides | one shot | by @inkedtae - ❤️‍🔥

jungkook | Halloween Treat | one shot | by @adonis-koo - ❤️‍🔥

jungkook | Naughty Pictures | one shot | by @sparklingchim - ❤️‍🔥

jungkook | Gaming and Cockwarming | one shot | by @smilesjeon - ❤️‍🔥

jungkook | Boy with Luv | one shot | by @hannieehaee - ❤️‍🔥

jungkook | Alpha | two-part | by @borathae -❤️‍🔥❤️‍🩹

taehyung | Heatwave | one shot | by @curly-bangtan - ❤️‍🔥

taehyung | Bound By Blood | one shot | by @ctrlhope - ❤️‍🔥

taehyung | Norway | one shot | by @edytae - ❤️‍🔥

namjoon | Booty Call | one shot | by @jeonnhera - ❤️‍🩹❤️‍🔥

yoongi | Disco Overload | one shot | by @caught-in-a-seesaw-stigma - ❤️‍🔥

yoongi | Unexpected | series | by @noona-la-la-la - ❤️‍🔥 (🏆)

SEVENTEEN

mingyu | Challenge Me | series | by @seokgyuu - ❤️‍🔥

mingyu | The Perils of Apartment Living | one shot | by @dontflailmenow - ❤️‍🔥

wonwoo | endpoint | one shot | by @highvern -❤️‍🔥❤️‍🩹

wonwoo | marry a rich man | one shot | by @thedensworld - ❤️‍🔥

NCT 127

jaehyun | Trick or Treat | one shot | by @yunopouts - ❤️‍🔥

jaehyun | WET THE BED | one shot | by @jamjaemin - ❤️‍🔥

jaehyun | no title | one shot | by @freakynct - ❤️‍🔥

jaehyun | Team Captain | one shot | by @smileysuh - ❤️‍🔥

jaehyun | I’m Not The Only One | two-part series | by @theje0ngs - ❤️‍🩹(🏆, it stings though)

jaehyun | Paubaya | one shot | by @theje0ngs - ❤️‍🩹

jaehyun | Heartaches | one shot | by @smileysuh - ❤️‍🩹❤️‍🔥

jaehyun | Rose Bud | one shot | by @hazyhae - ❤️‍🔥❤️‍🩹

jaehyun | Can’t Get You Out Of My Mind | one shot | by @starryhyuck - ❤️‍🔥

johnny | Not Another Song About Love | series | by @ms-indifferwnt - ❤️‍🩹

multiple | Quarantine Chronicles | series | by @domjaehyun - ❤️‍🔥 (🏆, literal icon with 28k words)

GOT 7

multiple | Open Season | two-part | by @smileysuh - ❤️‍🔥

multiple | Rosemary & Thyme | one shot | by @softforimjaebum - ❤️‍🔥

EXO

baekhyun | Paraphilia | series | by @byuntrash101 - ❤️‍🔥

baekhyun | Edging | one shot | by @biaswreckingfics - ❤️‍🔥

jongin | Daddy | one shot | by @xofanfics - ❤️‍🔥

BIG BANG

seunghyun | Messes We Made | series | by @noonachronicles - ❤️‍🩹❤️‍🔥