#sometimes they're right
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During this relisten I have been paying attention to potential evidence supporting this response to my character parallels post. The thoughts I have marshaled so far are,
Eiffel projects onto Hilbert. (This is relevant, bear with me.) He tells him - right after Hilbert tries to kill them and rips apart Hera's brain, no less! - that they're not so different. In Bolero, he tells Hilbert's memory that he wanted to believe even someone who had hurt so many people could change - he was clearly invested in Hilbert's improvement as a sign he could improve too, and vocalizing that makes him stop drinking, because he still has the chance to be better.
Why does this matter? Because in Desperate Measures, Eiffel tells Maxwell,
I knew it. I knew underneath all that sparkle and charm you were just as bad as Hilbert.
If he's projecting onto Hilbert, you could also read that as "I knew you were just as bad as me". Especially when he continues,
Hell, you're worse. You made Hera think you really cared, just to stab her in the back. Even Hilbert never sunk that low.
Eiffel claims he was pretty good at being a dad before things went wrong. I can easily see him being the 'fun' parent, who breezes in to bring presents or have a good time but doesn't stick around for any of the hard stuff. He made Anne think he cared. He had a responsibility to her, and then instead he was selfish and impulsive and got her and other people hurt. Even Hilbert didn't do that. But Maxwell did.
So yes, I can see Eiffel reacting badly to Maxwell because of the nature of her betrayal, just as he reacts strongly to Pryce for the same reason. But he dislikes her from the start. The response on the linked post suggests he picks up on her facade, and there could be something to that. Eiffel is aware he's putting on a show. In "Super Energy Saver Mode" when he's imitating Minkowski, he says
You are the most incompetent excuse for an enlisted man I have ever met. The only things you’ve done for the past 500 days have been sleep on the job, endanger our lives, and continually make stupid jokes just to hide the fact that you’re -
He might have been planning to say "worthless" or "filled with self-loathing" or something similar, but the point is, he's conscious that his behavior is an act to cover up characteristics he finds shameful or undesirable. Later, when Lovelace shows up, he tells Minkowski he knows a thing or two about telling lies. And, as the linked post notes, he sees through Cutter right away. Maxwell is the only other one to have such a strong negative reaction to Goddard's recruitment attempts.
Taking this all into consideration, my best guess is that after the Urania picked Eiffel up, Kepler and Jacobi sent Maxwell (the member of their team with the least god awful social skills) to play good cop and try to get some intel out of Eiffel - which, I'll note, is exactly what Minkowski had him do to Lovelace when she first showed up. However, Eiffel immediately saw through Maxwell's "sparkle and charm", picked up on her insincerity, and held on to that impression throughout her time on the station, even though her overtures to Hera probably were a lot more sincere. He saw her as someone who would put on a cheerful, funny front and pretend to give a shit but, when the chips were down, would take the selfish option and get people hurt. Like he said, from the start he knew - or suspected - that she was just as bad as him.
#is he right? eh idk I feel like they have very different primary flaws and traits#however in w359 everyone is projecting wildly onto each other#sometimes they're right#sometimes they're way off#sometimes they're wrong but come at it from such a weird angle they wrap around into being on target again#wolf 359
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everyone out of the way, this is the only thing I'm going to be thinking about from now on.
(okay, there is one more thing)
#art#twisted wonderland#twisted wonderland spoilers#lost in the book with nightmare before christmas#hajimari no halloween#jade is having the time of his life being a nasty little mofo and i love him for it#and gosh...leona and sally being friends is SO cute#sometimes i forget that leona is canonically a feminist#sally poisons a man and he's like 'you go girl'#they have so much in common though!#they both have eye scars and no ears on the sides of their heads!#no but they're adorable and i love it#and i suppose i have to reluctantly admit that i understand why lilia could not be in this event#he would just be stuffing frogs into his mouth left and right without even blinking#every time we get a moment of culture-clash he would just be there like 'mm-hm. yes. i do not see the problem.'#man. i do so adore any event that forces the boys to Work Together#their one weakness...not being petty dipshits who get into slapfights at the drop of a hat#absolutely nothing got done that first day and the mayor set off the emergency alarm because he was so done with them#this is perfection#anyway brb gotta go do some missions for the other jack's birthday#see you next week for more of scully becoming increasingly disillusioned with all these fake halloween fans
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crows use tools and like to slide down snowy hills. today we saw a goose with a hurt foot who was kept safe by his flock - before taking off, they waited for him to catch up. there are colors only butterflies see. reindeer are matriarchical. cows have best friends and 4 stomachs and like jazz music. i watched a video recently of an octopus making himself a door out of a coconut shell.
i am a little soft, okay. but sometimes i can't talk either. the world is like fractal light to me, and passes through my skin in tendrils. i feel certain small things like a catapult; i skirt around the big things and somehow arrive in crisis without ever realizing i'm in pain.
in 5th grade we read The Curious Incident of the Dog In The Night-time, which is about a young autistic boy. it is how they introduced us to empathy about neurotypes, which was well-timed: around 10 years old was when i started having my life fully ruined by symptoms. people started noticing.
i wonder if birds can tell if another bird is odd. like the phrase odd duck. i have to believe that all odd ducks are still very much loved by the other normal ducks. i have to believe that, or i will cry.
i remember my 5th grade teacher holding the curious incident up, dazzled by the language written by someone who is neurotypical. my teacher said: "sometimes i want to cut open their mind to know exactly how autistics are thinking. it's just so different! they must see the world so strangely!" later, at 22, in my education classes, we were taught to say a person with autism or a person on the spectrum or neurodivergent. i actually personally kind of like person-first language - it implies the other person is trying to protect me from myself. i know they had to teach themselves that pattern of speech, is all, and it shows they're at least trying. and i was a person first, even if i wasn't good at it.
plants learn information. they must encode data somehow, but where would they store it? when you cut open a sapling, you cannot find the how they think - if they "think" at all. they learn, but do not think. i want to paint that process - i think it would be mostly purple and blue.
the book was not about me, it was about a young boy. his life was patterned into a different set of categories. he did not cry about the tag on his shirt. i remember reading it and saying to myself: i am wrong, and broken, but it isn't in this way. something else is wrong with me instead. later, in that same person-first education class, my teacher would bring up the curious incident and mention that it is now widely panned as being inaccurate and stereotypical. she frowned and said we might not know how a person with autism thinks, but it is unlikely to be expressed in that way. this book was written with the best intentions by a special-ed teacher, but there's some debate as to if somebody who was on the spectrum would be even able to write something like this.
we might not understand it, but crows and ravens have developed their own language. this is also true of whales, dolphins, and many other species. i do not know how a crow thinks, but we do know they can problem solve. (is "thinking" equal to "problem solving"? or is "thinking" data processing? data management?) i do not know how my dog thinks, either, but we "talk" all the same - i know what he is asking for, even if he only asks once.
i am not a dolphin or reindeer or a dog in the nighttime, but i am an odd duck. in the ugly duckling, she grows up and comes home and is beautiful and finds her soulmate. all that ugliness she experienced lives in downy feathers inside of her, staining everything a muted grey. she is beautiful eventually, though, so she is loved. they do not want to cut her open to see how she thinks.
a while ago i got into an argument with a classmate about that weird sia music video about autism. my classmate said she thought it was good to raise awareness. i told her they should have just hired someone else to do it. she said it's not fair to an autistic person to expect them to be able to handle that kind of a thing.
today i saw a goose, and he was limping. i want to be loved like a flock loves a wounded creature: the phrase taken under a wing. which is to say i have always known i am not normal. desperate, mewling - i want to be loved beyond words.
loved beyond thinking.
#spilled ink#writeblr#personal#please don't ask me to talk on my experience on the spectrum lol. i hate how ppl talk to me about it#i really try not to write so specifically about it#bc inevitably someone talks to me like im a child#i think this is the first time i've ever openly identified with it but i've been hinting for years#i might delete this. feels big.#the thing is that being on the spectrum actually IS a spectrum#and if u say ur autistic#inevitably someone makes an assumption about ur needs/symptoms#please do not treat me differently than u usually would. like.... we can tell when you do#and like i mention. i do appreciate the effort. i do truly appreciate the effort.#but it still feels like...#when i was blind. sometimes people kind of did the same-ish thing.#they'd find out i was blind and start talking really loudly?#and while i KNOW they're just trying to help. it would be like. i'd be trying to find#the right way into a building (sometimes only 1 door is unlocked and i couldn't see the signs posted about where to go)#and ppl would be like ''OH UR BLIND? YES SO THIS IS A DOOR. IT OPENS INTO THE BUILDING. IT IS LOCKED NOW."#''A DOOR CAN BE FOUND IN MANY LOCATIONS.''#and it feels like. when i admit to being autistic#someone comes screeching into my life being like THIS IS A DOOR.
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Odysseus always trusted Penelope. He was ordered to lie to her and it hurt him to do so. Penelope was distrustful of this stranger until she had absolute solid proof.
There are way too many people talking about how "Odysseus lies to Penelope. What a prick!" and it makes me sad/mad as that's not the case at all
The whole "Odysseus usually always has a reason to lie" maybe upcoming essay aside, He was literally commanded by Athena to not tell anyone. And it was with Penelope that he had the hardest time keeping up the act with. Not only because she's smart af and figured him out almost immediately (that essay coming soon too) but because he was trying to keep himself from crying with her.
I think people forget that he is disguised to look like someone else completely. If a random man claimed to be your missing husband, wouldn't you be scared/freaked out?
Anyways, the 3 most important people in his life are Penelope, Telemachus, and Laertes. He lies to all three.
Telemachus: Lied by letting Eumaeus answer him and still under the orders from Athena, did not cry or reveal himself until Athena allowed him to. (I read it as him being in shock. Last time he saw him, Telemachus' hand could only wrap around one finger and now he's as big as him. a bit shocking to say the least)
Laertes: He teared up seeing him but still decided to question and test his father, not by the order from Athena.
Penelope: He was trying so hard to keep from crying, tried to noodle his way out of lying to her, Under Athena's orders. still couldn't help but basically flirt with her.
Also to get this outta the way: No, it wasn't a matter of trust. He is shown to trust her right away. As this happens even before he gets the chance to speak with Penelope.
Staunch Odysseus glowed with joy to hear all this— his wife's trickery luring gifts from her suitors now, enchanting their hearts with suave seductive words but all the while with something else in mind.
(Book 18, Fagles)
If Odysseus does not trust her, why is he so happy to see her "flirt" with the suitors? It's because he KNOWS what she's doing and knows she doesn't actually want them. If he didn't trust her, he would be upset by this.
Now for the "it hurt to lie to her" bit.
Athena's command:
"Tell not a single person in the palace, man or woman, that you are back from your wanderings; but endure all vexations in silence and submit yourself to the indignities that will be put upon you.'
(Book 13, Rieu)
If you are my son—truly of our blood— let no one hear Odysseus is back home. Don’t let Laertes know or the swineherd, or the slaves, or Penelope herself.
(Book 16, Johnston)
And the people he did reveal himself to, he only did so after being given permission by Athena.
Athene spoke to him. 'The time has come,' she said, 'royal son of Laertes, Odysseus of the nimble wits, to let Telemachus into your secret, so that the pair of you may plot the downfall and death of the Suitors and then make your way to the famous city. [...]
(Book 15, Rieu)
He talks to Telemachus before talking to Penelope.
I’ll stay here, so I can stir the servants even more— and your mother. As she laments, she’ll ask for each and every detail.”
(Book 19, Johnston)
Odysseus is already sweating about having to lie to her
The next part would honestly be me just inserting almost ALL the text for this so I'll go into a summary. It's all in Book 19.
Penelope asks him where he's from. And instead of answering, it's a tsunami of compliments. Calling her flawless. Comparing her to a king. etc, etc,
Probably because he couldn't help himself and had to babble about how wonderful she is Who wouldn't? before finally ending with "Please don't ask me where I'm from. It makes me sad."
Penelope, probably overwhelmed by his praise, immediately goes into how "her beauty left with her husband. It did not. And where did you say you were from again?"
"Fine! I'm from Crete..."
And we all know that as soon as she starts crying, after a lovely description of how her tears "melted", he talks about how hard it was for Odysseus to hold in his OWN tears. Lying to her and being unable to comfort her was painful for him!!!
But though Odysseus' heart was wrung by his wife's distress, his eyes, hard as horn or iron, never wavered between their lids, so craftily did he repress his tears.
(Book 19, Rieu)
I love Robert Fitzgerald's translation so as a treat:
[...] so her white cheeks were wetted by these tears shed for her lord--and he close by her side. Imagine how his heart ached for his lady, his wife in tears; and yet he never blinked; his eyes might have been made of horn or iron for all that she could see. He had this trick-- wept, if he willed to, inwardly.
(Book 19, Fitzgerald)
Even with him revealing himself to Euryclea, when she cried out to Penelope, Athena made sure she didn't hear! It's most likely that he wouldn't be able to tell her even if he wanted. Athena was planning something, just as Penelope was.
She spoke, and her eyes glanced over at Penelope, anxious to tell her that her husband had come home. But Penelope could not see her face or notice, for Athena had diverted her attention.
(Book 19, Johnston)
He desperately wanted to be with her again. Literally daydreaming about it!
At those words Dawn rose on her golden throne in a sudden gleam of light. And great Odysseus caught the sound of his wife’s cry and began to daydream—deep in his heart it seemed she stood beside him, knew him, now, at last …
(book 20, Fagles)
Clearly doesn't trust her. /sarcasm
It's PENELOPE that has trouble trusting him. And rightfully so! While she was very certain that was her husband, there was so much going on and of course, she's cautious! He looked like an elderly stranger at first, why is he hiding from her? He somehow took out all those men with only a little help, Athena isn't telling her anything, Helen was kidnapped and she did not want that to possibly happen to her too, etc.
He even understands her cautiousness to be reasonable.
As she spoke, lord Odysseus, who had borne so much, smiled and immediately spoke to Telemachus— his words had wings: “Telemachus, let your mother test me in these halls. She will soon possess more certain knowledge. Right now I’m filthy, with disgusting clothing on my body. That’s why she rejects me and will not say I am Odysseus. [...]
(Book 23, Johnston)
He even trusted her completely to take care of everything while he was gone before. And he does again when he wakes up and goes to see his father. Telling her about how she too wise to need instruction
Odysseus (and Penelope as well) is well-known for his cunning tricks and how his loyalties are often blurred but one thing that is for sure about him is that he trusts and is loyal to Penelope full-heartedly. He spent every day missing her and their son and wanting to go home to her. The only moment we see his trust in her waver is during the Treebed scene, (which is what she wanted to test).
They are "like-minded". 😭
#FUCKING SOULMATES!!! *SLAMS FIST ON TABLE*#AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAa#Mad rambles#shot by odysseus#essay#penelope#odysseus#penelope of ithaca#odysseus x penelope#penelope odyssey#odyssey#the odyssey#tagamemnon#greek mythology#epic the musical#odypen#Odysseus is distrustful of basically everyone but her and Telemachus. They're also the only two that he's 100% loyal to.🥹#please don't mind the multiple translations. :') Sometime you have a sleeping kitty cat on you and can't lean over to grab your book so you#get it online :')#sorry but this is something that bugs me a lil as like. she's the ONLY one he truly trusts anymore. if he had his way. I'm sure he would've#just went to her right away.
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So you're a go to source for all things Dick&Tim bros and you tend to write primarily from Dick's POV. So, odd question, but if you were to summarize their relationship from his POV in FIVE panels which panels would you pick? Keeping in mind that one specific aspect of their relationship that you love needs to be clearly represented by each panel (loyalty, trust etc). I hope this is a fun challenge and not an annoying question so if you don't want to answer that's cool! Have a wonderful day!
No more talk. The same thoughts run through two minds... (SotB 29) / You're my equal. My closest ally. (RR 1) / I can't stop thinking how much I rely on him. (GoG 3)
25 Feelings Dick Has About Tim
This was such a kind ask & a cool challenge which I totally failed; here are TWENTY-five panels of Dick's POV on Tim sdfdsfds Look, I got carried away! Marcia and Cindy! The boys!!
OKAY SO BEFORE I GET TO THE PANELS A FEW NOTES:
WARNING THAT THERE ARE SOME NEGATIVE EMOTIONS IN HERE because I love conflict but but but you gotta remember those are not the final word!! They are complicated people and sometimes they get mad at each other BUT ultimately their relationship is so hugely important in both their lives & they love each other and rely on each other so much -!!! <3
Also I have CONCLUDING THOUGHTS at the end about what Dick's POV leaves out (mostly: a lot of Dick defending & protecting & supporting Tim, which Dick does instinctively but isn't very self-aware about most of the time)
I have loosely organized my list into 5^5 format (5 categories with 5 examples each!), so if you want to skip to a relevant one, here are the categories!!
Below the cut:
I hate him and find him infuriating (#1-5)
On second thought, he's endearing & fun (#6-10)
Grief is complicated & he's all tangled up in mine (#11-15)
I love him & think highly of him (#16-20)
I rely on him & though it's hard for me, I trust him (#21-25)
I hate him and find him infuriating (#1 - 5)
1) He thinks he’s so smart and can psychoanalyze me and Bruce, but he doesn’t know me at all, he should get lost (New Titans 61)
2) He thinks he’s so smart and can psychoanalyze Bruce but he doesn’t know Bruce at all, he should get lost (Gotham Knights 26)
3) He is so nosy about stuff that is MY business (Robin 0)
4) He sounds like an insincere suck-up half the time... but okay, fine, if you push him he's got a sense of humor about it (New Titans 65)
5) I'm sure he's a better vigilante than me. It's my fault for being a failure, but I resent him anyway. (Nightwing 9 - Dick's having a nightmare)
On second thought, he's kinda endearing (#6-10)
6) He worries too much and gets anxious so easily, but it makes him fun to tease (Robin 67)
7) I'm not that competitive - okay, so maybe I'm a little competitive, I gotta make sure he doesn't get a swelled head (Prodigal)
8) I'm supposed to be his favorite! It is not cool for him to be fanboying over my not-girlfriend's not-boyfriend!! (Birds of Prey 19)
9) We have fun together. I can kick back and relax when it's just the two of us. Plus I get to boss him around a bit. (Prodigal)
10) He’s always trying to reassure me, and I guess it's a little comforting, but also he doesn’t really get it. Or me. He makes excuses that he shouldn't, because he doesn't understand that I suck. (Nightwing 64)
Grief is complicated and he's all tangled up in mine (#11 - 15)
11) He reminds me of everything I try not to think about. Sometimes the memories are so strong it hurts to look at him. (Batman 441)
12) WHY IS HE BEING IMPOSSIBLE ALL OF A SUDDEN??? THIS IS SO FRUSTRATING (Nightwing 139)
13) We're the same. He says all the things I don't let myself think about. It's like arguing with myself. (Nightwing 139)
14) He thinks he gets to tell me what to do but he doesn’t, fuck him (Battle for the Cowl)
15) Life sucks, so what. I sucked it up so he should too (RR 1)
I love him and think highly of him (#16 - 20)
16) He’s the closest thing to a brother I’ll ever have. If someone hurts him I will hurt them harder. (Nightwing 6)
17) I can't handle the idea of losing him. (Nightwing 97)
17) He’s so good and I’m not. I'm afraid I’m bad for him. (Nightwing 110)
18) He’s better than me, and it’s kind of a relief because I know no matter what he’ll be okay. (Gates of Gotham 3)
19) In my head he’s the responsible one. (Gotham Knights 10)
I rely on him, and though it's hard for me, I trust him (#20-25)
20) I know I have to trust him but I'm afraid he'll make the wrong choices and get hurt (Nightwing 139)
21) I'm sure I know what he should do because I see myself in him - not that I can take my own advice, but he should (Blackest Night 3)
22) I trust him. When I’m losing my grip on things, he pulls me back. (Gotham Knights 10)
23) I want him to trust me (Red Robin 12)
24) He can tell when I'm lying. Sometimes he sees my weaknesses better than I wish he did. (Detective Comics 874)
25) He’s always there when I need him. (Teen Titans / Outsiders Secret Files)
Final rambling thoughts:
TIM: Uhh, okay, so I'm just skimming this list - do you really trust me? you're not just saying that? - but anyway, I'm confused because you left some stuff out? Like some stuff that's kinda important? DICK: No? I think I got everything? TIM (starts counting on his fingers): The time I was having a bad day but then I called you. The time I got captured by Two-Face but then you saved me. The time I fell off a train but then you saved me. The time I fell off a building but then you saved me. The time I fell off a different building - DICK: I feel like you're trying to make some kind of point but I'm not sure what it could be.
SO THE THING IS, I put 25 panels in here and not a single one has Dick catching Tim when he’s falling!!! But I think that's a central motif of their relationship from Tim’s POV, not Dick’s. I love Dick, but in some ways I think he is spectacularly un-self-aware.
And I think he especially has a lot of blind spots about Tim. He kinda intermittently gets that Tim admires him, and he enjoys it in a playful I-get-to-boss-you-around way. But Dick tends to consistently underestimate all of his own good qualities & skills, and he meets Tim at a point in his life when he's especially down on himself & his abilities. And so he's unable to see his own influence on Tim, & therefore unable to fully understand a lot of Tim's priorities and loyalties and motivations, because you can't actually understand Tim without understanding Dick's impact on him. There's a fascinating moment in Bruce Wayne: Murderer when Dick's completely blindsided & upset to discover that Tim doesn't entirely trust Bruce, even though this has been a definitive fact of Tim's whole thing ever since he showed up with his Batman needs Robin theory, and Barbara has to actively remind Dick of the obvious-to-everyone-except-Dick fact that a lot of Tim's loyalty is to Dick, and Tim loves Bruce but feels free to be more wary of him. (And to give Bruce credit: this is not something he ever begrudges.) But anyway Babs points this out, and Dick manages to sorta process it for about five seconds, but he cannot actually accept it into his worldview so instead he discards it at the speed of light and goes off and has an argument with Tim instead sdfsfdsf
All of Dick's virtues - Dick's kindness at the circus and Dick's determination to fight through grief and Dick's rigid sense of morals and Dick's vigilante skills and every time Dick has ever backed Tim up or listened to him or protected him or saved him from something or just been casually kind to a stranger in Tim's presence etc etc etc - all these things loom really large in Tim's mental story of Who Dick Is, and What Dick And Tim's Relationship Is. Tim meets Dick before he meets Bruce, trusts Dick more than Bruce, aspires to be Robin instead of Batman. And so in Tim's default version of the story, Dick is the super-special and admirable hero and Tim is... nobody in particular, a tagalong outsider who's barely managing to be a hero, not part of Dick and Bruce's family and not part of their story, who, if he's VERY LUCKY and tries REALLY HARD, might be able to fight his way to proving himself and offering something to Dick that Dick will value, if Dick doesn't get fed up with him first.
But that's not Dick's version of the story!!!
Dick's version of the story is almost the exact opposite, a story where Dick's an outcast failure black sheep who's screwing up everything he tries, and meanwhile Tim is The Sudden New Perfect Robin Who's Better Than Me And Probably Bruce Loves Him More And Probably They Gossip About What A Loser I Am, mixed with a complicated edge of Tim Thinks He's So Smart But He Doesn't Know Me/Us At All. Dick gets much more attached to Tim over time, and Tim gets unnervingly better at the know-it-all psychoanalysis so then Dick gets to have complicated feelings about him being right instead of just annoyance at him for being wrong, plus Dick's relationship with Bruce improves a lot, so Tim stops feeling so threatening. But Dick never fundamentally changes his basic theory of their relationship in which Tim is highly impressive and capable, and Dick is not so much.
And so asking Dick about Tim is kinda like if you asked George Bailey to tell you about Harry Bailey in It's A Wonderful Life; like, you'll be there for five hours while he tells you how great Harry is, and how accomplished Harry is, and how he doesn't really get how or why Harry does the things he does, and maybe George does feel a little resentful or jealous sometimes, but that pales in comparison to all his admiration and trust for Harry who he loves so much, who's better than him in so many ways, and he's not gonna openly gripe but secretly he can't help but feel sometimes like he's such a failure in comparison to Harry, a perfect person who emerged fully formed from Zeus's head with all the virtues and also all the accomplishments, etc. etc. etc. --
-- and he will not actually remember the part where he changed and saved Harry's whole entire life unless you literally send him to an alternate timeline in order to force him to remember it. <3
#i enjoyed thinking about this so much i wrote a novel with All My Thoughts sorry sdfsdfs#tim drake#dick grayson#somewhat tangential but as i was writing this i was thinking about zahri's post#about how different types of stories offer different kinds of emotional payoffs#and i think for me for dick and tim the main two payoffs are:#1) someone who sees & understands your grief for deaths that will never get fixed or get better#and who will face your ghosts with you EVEN WHEN you're also mad at each other#2) someone who you look at and you see all the ways that you suck & he's better & you're a loser who's failed him etc etc#but it turns out that you're wrong. that you're good enough. not that none of the failures were real or that they were all in your head#but it turns out that it's okay that you didn't always immediately do or feel the right thing#and it's okay that you weren't perfect. you can fuck up six thousand ways & everything you did right will still matter#not because of making excuses or allowances or somebody pityingly trying to make you feel better#but because in the end the things you did right are just Genuinely More Valuable than anything you did wrong#all the times you tried & everything that you tried to give - everything you think wasn't good enough - it was.#IN OTHER WORDS they are both convinced they're not good enough & they are both wrong <3#anyway dick and tim are both INCREDIBLY SIMILAR and also CONSTANTLY misreading each other and i love that for them#and like. they will sometimes totally misread each other & then never figure out the part that they misunderstood#but then they manage to keep going anyway. we love each other on purpose <333#ask tag#dick&tim
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Miguel is Fine, Actually (Being Spider-Man's Just Toxic As Hell)
Before I watched ATSV I said that I would defend my man Miguel O'Hara's actions no matter what, because he's always valid and I support women's wrongs. I was joking, and I did not actually expect to start defending him on Tumblr.edu. But I'm seeing a lot of commentary that's super reductive, so I do want to bring up another perspective on his character.
Miguel wasn't acting against the spirit of Spider-Man, or what being Spider-Man means. Miguel isn't meant to represent the antithesis of Spider-Man. Miles is the antithesis of Spider-Man. Miguel represents Spider-Man taken to its extreme.
Think about Miguel's actions from his perspective. If you were a hero who genuinely, legitimately, 100%, no doubt about it, believed that somebody is going to make a selfish decision that will destroy an entire universe and put the entire multiverse at severe risk - if you had an over-burdened sense of responsibility and believed in doing the right thing no matter what - you would also chase down the kid and put him in baby jail to try and prevent it. He believed that he was saving the multiverse, and that Miles was putting it in danger for selfish reasons. Which is completely unforgivable to him, because selfishness is what he hates the most. And then he goes completely out of pocket and starts beefing with a 15yo lmfaooo he's such a dick.
But why did Miguel believe that? Why did he believe that Miles choosing himself and his own happiness over the well-being of others was the worst possible thing? Why did he believe that tragedy was inevitable in their lives, and that without tragedy Spider-Man can't exist?
Because he's Spider-Man.
Peter Parker was once a fifteen year old who chose his own happiness over protecting others. It was the greatest regret of his life and he never forgave himself. Peter's ethos means that he will put himself last every time, and that he will sacrifice anything and everything in his life - his relationships, his health, his future - to protecting and helping others. Peter dropped out of college because it interfered with Spider-Man. He destroyed his own future for Spider-Man. He ruins friendships and romantic relationships because Spider-Man was more important. If Peter ever tries to protect himself and his own happiness, then he's a bad person.
That is intrinsic to Peter. Peter would not be Peter without it. A story that is not defined by Peter's unhappiness is not a Spider-Man story. If Peter doesn't make himself miserable, then he's just not Peter.
That is a Spider-Man story: that not only is tragedy inevitable, that if you don't allow yourself to be defined by your tragedy then you're a bad person. If you don't suffer, then you're a bad person. If you ever put anything above Spider-Man, then you're killing Uncle Ben all over again. Miguel isn't the only one that believes this - as we saw, every Spider-Man buys into what he's saying. There's no Spider-Man without these beliefs.
Miguel attempted to find his own happiness, and he was punished in the most extreme way. He got Uncle Ben'd x10000. He tried to be happy, and it literally destroyed his entire universe. It's the Spider-narrative taken to the extreme. Of course Miguel believes all of this. Of course he believes this so firmly. He's Spider-Man. That's his story. And the one time Miguel tried to fight against that story, he was punished. And like any Spider-Man, he'll slavishly obey that narrative no matter the evil it creates and perpetuates. Because if he doesn't, the narrative will punish him. The narrative will always punish him. It's a Spider-Man story.
I don't think the universal constant between Spider-Mans, the thing that makes them Spider-Man, is tragedy. I think it's the fact that they never forgive themselves. And Miguel is what that viewpoint creates. He doesn't believe this things because he's an awful, mean person. He believes them because he's a hero. He's a good person who hates himself.
Across the Spider-verse isn't really a Spider-Man story. It's a story about Spider-Man stories. Miguel's right: if this was a Spider-Man story, then Miles acting selfishly really would destroy the universe. But Miles' story isn't interested in punishing him. It pushes back against Peter's narrative that unhappiness is inevitable and that you have to suffer to be a good person. It says that sometimes we do the right thing from love and not fear, and that Peter's way of thinking is ultimately super toxic and unhappy. ITSV was about Miles deciding that he didn't need to be Peter Parker, that all he needed to be was Miles, and ATSV is about how being Peter Parker isn't such a good thing. Miguel shows that. Whatever toxic and unhealthy beliefs he holds - they're the exact same beliefs that any Spider-Man holds. He's a dick, but I don't think he's any more awful a person than Peter is.
TL;DR: Miguel isn't a bad person, he just has Spider-Man brainrot.
#across the spider-verse#atsv#atsv spoilers#across the spider-verse spoilers#across the spiderverse#across the spider verse#miguel o'hara#atsv meta#source: i recognized an embarassing amount of those cameos#im also seeing a lot of ppl make a lot of assumptions about what miguel was injecting and why#we dunno guys! im not gonna suppose anything#I just think that Miguel and Miles are great foils#and that what makes them interesting as foils#is the fact that they're both good people who want to do the right thing#miguel shows how that gets twisted#to the point where you beef with a 15yo sometimes which is still so funny#im a big spidey 2099 fan#which I love bc it is NOTHING like spiderman and yet it's such a good spiderman story#but talking about comics migs is useless bc he has 0 in common with atsv migs#but there is a lot of VERY cool stuff to say about how#the sm2099 comic has nothing to do with spiderman at all whatsoever extremely pointedly#but its still a wonderful spiderman story that finds its own way#tbh it was kind of a breath of fresh air to read a spider-man story that wasn't about spider-man for once#and that was just about miguel#anyway stan women's wrongs#miguel o hara#miguel ohara#my writing
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The Bedside Manner Duo.
Bonus Poppys cause I had to really practice to figure out how to draw her waahah! Conventionally cute designs are hard for me....
#kamen rider exaid#poppy pipopapo#emu hojo#hiiro kagami#kamen rider#fan art#the show is punishing me for putting them into the 'do not separate' category right now.....#they're eachother's only friends lmao#sometimes i feel like i only draw cool stuff... i like to draw cute characters too sometimes aaahaha!#but i had to really work to get poppy right... not my usual wheelhouse#her skirt almost killed me but i survived#worth it. I love her.#give me the strength to not attempt to draw poppy's rider form... I think all the exaid suits would be difficult#I'm having a lot of fun with ExAid#Everybody else is so MEAN but I genuinely like all our heroes and even our villains!
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had a(nother) nightmare
#deltarune#rouxls kaard#lancer#queen#art#lancer had a bad dream. rouxls comes in to fall asleep in the floor like he always does. queen followed because she needs to#Familiarize Herself with The Rituals and also hey her boy is sad#and then they ALL fell asleep in the floor literally right next to his bed#-- i had tire marks on the bedsheets but they vanished somewhere. damn it#this one isnt old btw i just drew this This Morning HEHEHEHE#its kinda scrungy but thats ok#ok 2 tag ship but not explicitly ship either if ur not into it#i love that half my 'qk' art can very easily be read platonically#i think thats an important aspect of their relationship is that they are good friends and coparents. and THEN they're kissing sometimes#this is hardly the first family cuddle and or sleep pile ive drawn. i never posted my favorite i dont think#i am just all about sleep and cuddle piles. did u know swatchlings love to sleep in piles (headcanon)#if one bird falls asleep in the cafe the odds are very good that one or two more will join them#theres a pile of birds in booth 4 all shoved in there haphazardly and eeping. swatch is coming with pots and pans.
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POV you interrupted their date 😡💢 (they're still kinda shy about being seen together in public)
#jerry draws#boostle#booster gold#blue beetle#ted kord#dc fanart#fanart#i did two sketches for that boostle eating lunch prompt & liked them both equally. so here's the second one#i kinda went lazy with it & it's a bit more messy. but i kinda dig that look tbh. gotta be messy messy sometimes right?#also shoutout to Booster for eating pierogi - the finest polish cuisine! all dumplings rule but pierogi are special to me ❤️#i think they're in a polish restaurant since Ted's eating a sad salad. he chose the least greasy food available on the menu#poor guy. gotta watch his heart etc. idk anything about the diet best for heart problems sorry for speaking outta my ass
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If you look at jewish people voicing their concerns about antisemitism as anything close to a "victim complex," you're just an antisemite, like... How do two THOUSAND PLUS years of antisemitism around the globe sail over your head so easily.
#jumblr#judaism#jewish politics#personal thoughts tag#antisemitism tw#i've been seeing so much antisemitism and antisemetic downplaying of anything jews say concern them and it's like.#this isn't even really ABOUT anything more specific than 'every time jews voice their concerns they're called victim complex havers'#i wonder what would give the impression that jews have been victims before. hm. wonder what made them (soon us) so worried for millenia#it doesn't feel appropriate to say 'us' yet but it's also just... hard not to sometimes you know?#so if it comes across like i'm saying it's 'us' when right now it isn't... yeah i'm sorry#i am just... really frusterated about all of this and i know it's something you almost 'get used to' but it still fucks with me
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Looks like you found one of those golden retriever girls! Good luck with that, Tamarack
(Fake screenshots! These are fan made based on incorrect quotes and not in the game)
#our life#our life 2#our life now and forever#olnf#olnf tamarack#tamarack baumann#our life tamarack#incorrect quotes#fan edit#fan made#not canon#mc annabeth#annabeth is soooooo jason mendoza coded it's crazy#like she's not stupid but she is kinda dumb and happy most of the time and she loves tama more than anything#this quote probably works a little better in step 3 but i don't have those sprites so maybe I'll redo this when i do#also tama is the ONLY person allowed to call her annie! everyone else calls her beck or maybe annabeth if they're close#i need the step 2 angst so bad it's not even funny. i need it and i need it right now#like none of my mcs are having a good time in step 2 but becks arc is about how hard it can be to always be the positive and upbeat one#and that maybe her two best neighbors take that for granted sometimes and need to let her feel negatively wo making her feel guilty#sunshine characters breaking down/snapping my beloved
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the thing is even if you hate basketball you'd be an idiot to not take those lakers tickets and go drool over lebron in probably his final season... everyone discoursing about how the lakers tickets were a bad gift is wrong. the tickets were a great gift if you like to drool over men
#like say what you will about the sport you cannot deny. He's Big And Hot.#bucktommy#who cares about sports at all! it's all about the butts and the arms#and sometimes they smash together in a sweaty fashion#i have been saying for ages but we need to start fujoing out about basketball players. please. they're ripe for it#you can't even SEE hockey players under all those pads but with basketball uniforms its all right out in the open
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Nina and Crowley Mr. Six Shots Of Espresso In A Big Cup
#good omens#good omens 2#good omens spoilers#nina good omens#crowley#goodomensedit#V posts things#V watches Good Omens#I just think they're neat!#Sometimes the recognition between a jaded coffee lesbian and a depressed overcaffeinated demon is something that can be so personal#Nina calling Crowley weird to his face is just so funny#she's right!! That's a weird dude#Her little wave to him at the end gets me#I do hope this isn't the last we see of her and Maggie#On a possibly related note I also hope Crowley gets some friends because he badly needs that
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For Requestober
Papyrus and Sans cozily hugging each other in soft clothes😭😭😭
(well this is literally first time I did this hope didn't do anything wrong)
Day 10 - Sleepy snoozey skeletons
#My art#Requestober#UT#Handplates#Papyrus#Sans#You did everything just fine!! Thank you for the req!! <3#How can I resist skeleton snuggles ah the cutes the sweet lads#You didn't specify Handplates but I went ahead and slapped one on there for funsies haha#Unusual for Papyrus to be out of his gloves! Maybe in that transitional period or just too sleepy and forgot haha#Those sillies in Gaster's old clothes - fashion icon that skeleton#I mean Sans is fairly normal-looking - he's always comfy!! Gotta be ready to nap on the spot#Every once in a while I still think back to when I first got into Undertale and there was this one fanart of Sans#In a very lovely loose and low-shouldered shirt <3 It's just a pretty image I carry around with me and sometimes emulate even now#A scoop neck on a skeleton shows off so many bones! Shoulders and scapulae and spine or ribs/clavicles ahh#Papyrus on the other hand is forging fashion hehe <3#Similar basketball shorts? Could be!#The posing was quite fun ah ♪ One leg over the other or one foot over the other#Almost mirrored! Not completely entangled but also very close!#Sans especially looks really cozy ahh <3 I love when he cat-snuggles into Papyrus' chest/under his chin#Protected-protective right over his Soul <3#As long as they're together they're fine ♥
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here's the piece i made for SweetheartsDie (ao3)'s riptide hockey au fic!!! this is for a scene in chapter 3 :] this was an absolute blast to work on & i hope to do more projects like this sometime :33
fic link here!
#just roll with it#jrwi#jrwi riptide#jrwi jay ferin#jrwi chip james#jrwi gillion tidestrider#jrwi pretzel#jrwi fanart#the background characters that Aren't pd are my dnd ocs btw :3 from left to right they're lyari & theo!#i will probably post about them sometime.!! i love them so dearly <3#gorvamp art
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You know how Newtopia is covered in sea motifs? How its king wears a coral crown? How Marcy's clothes always have some kind of seashell or wave design? How predominantly blue everything about Newtopia is? It would lead you to believe newts are associated with water and the sea, right? Frogs are seen in swamps and woodsy areas, while toads seem to live in a dryer, rockier terrain, but surely newts are all water, right?
No. As paradoxical as it may seem, newts are associated with fire.
#amphibia#marcy wu#my posts#king andrias#newtopia#like in folklore i mean. in folklore newts are considered fire animals#because sometimes they'd hid in logs people picked up from outside to burn#and when they set a fire a lot of tiny newts would scurry out in fear#so people thought newts came from fire#or was ir salamanders? they're the same thing right?
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