#sometimes the song comes on shuffle and im like yeah. Yeah.

[moonlightperseus]

but do you even know about the homoeroticism of to be a man from starkid's holy musical batman

[charcoallbaby]

the chase

smutty asf. 18+

wrote this last night while i was half asleep enjoy!

matt sturniolo was the biggest slut ever. if he wasn’t too busy with college work or being the hockey teams captain, a girl was definitely getting dicked down by him.

i was a sophomore, he was a junior so we never crossed paths until my best friend started to date one of his brothers nick. my best friend, sam was head over heelings for nick, it was annoying to be around but i was happy for him, he seemed to be really happy.

his brother matt sturniolo could never get his eyes off me when i was around him, it made me pissed off. i knew what his thoughts were, even if he was a cool guy, which he is. he’s nice and pretty and would never dare try to do something with me since sam and nick warned him that im off limits. but i think matt liked the chase, he liked the fact that he couldn’t have me. so all he did was eye fuck me across the room with a solo cup in his hand talking to some blonde who was practically begging for him. he could smile and girls would be throwing themselves at him.

i sighed before making my way over to sam and nick. “can we go?” “im getting tired,” i exhaled. “girllllll, come on!!!!” “the party is just getting started!” sam cheered. i rolled my eyes at him. nick touched my arm, “matt’s going home soon, he has a project to work on, i’m sure he’ll have no problem dropping you off.” “yeah-um sure, i’ll ask him.”

my eyes darted over to where matt was. no where to be found.

3 months later.

“it’s so fucking hot god!” i groaned. “don’t worry y/n, it’s because im here.” matt joked. i angrily rolled my eyes. “matt, what?” nick cringed. “it’s too hot in this car and i’m gonna die if we don’t get there soon.” i whined. “stop whining and be happy!” sam patted my head like a dog. “wait is there a pool or hot tub there?” chris asked nick. “hot tub chris, it’s a cabin in the middle of the woods!” “but we can just get the hot tub in while it’s cold.”

the second matt parked the car in the garage, i grabbed my bag, hopped out and ran towards the door inside. i needed to get into minimal clothing, i was wearing sweats for some reason.

“here she is!” “here she is!” sam sang out. a smile formed onto my face.

i wore a baby blue bikini set. it made my girls look amazing which rarely happens while having a heavy chest, bikini cup sizes always do me dirty.

i pulled myself up onto one of the kitchen island stools. “care to make me one?” i asked matt who was on the opposite side of the island cutting himself limes to put into his bottles of corona. “yeah sure,” he flashed me a small smile. he could be really sweet sometimes, it didn’t suit his slutty alter ego that he had. he had no shirt on. he looked really fucking good. small beads of sweat were around his neck, i wish i could lick them off. what. no. y/n stop. my eyes shifted down to his tattoos covering his right arm, it made him more attractive if that was even possible. i shook myself out of the heart-eyeing gaze i was in and turn my stool around to sam, chris and nick playing mario kart.

something cold touched my back making me jerk away from it and turn around. “here.” matt nodded his head. “thanks,” i took the bottle off him, our hands quickly touching. he had nice hands. matt made his way over to the boys in the open-planned living room joining them on the couch. “i’m just gonna go tanning!” i called out to the boys. “okay!”

i placed my headphones into my ears, pressing shuffle onto my playlist. the first song playing was “we are the people.” by empire of the sun.

i opened my eyes, something was blocking the sun. all the 4 boys standing in front of me. i ripped my headphones out of my ears. “excuse me?” i pull my sunglasses down from my head to cover my eyes. “we’re going to the store do you need anything?” sam asked. “oh-em,” “get me more tanning oil i’m out,” i propped myself up with my elbows. “girl, we meant food,” nick sighed. “oh, im good.” i smiled before laying back down. “can i have the keys?” sam asked. “oh yeah here,” i hear matt’s keys jingle. “wait,” i sat up. “who’s going?” i asked. “just me, nick and chris why?” sam pushing his hair out of his eyes. “oh no, just wondering.”

great. i’m gonna be here alone with matt.

the boys walked back inside. i picked my headphones up to put them back in my ear until i hear the door re-open. “thought i’d join you,” matt’s voice became louder.

i mentally groaned. i moved my head to my left and looked at him. “i’m not going to be doing a lot of talking, i’m tanning as you can see you,” i looked back up at the sky. a husky chuckle left matt’s mouth. “i was gonna turn on the hot tub and make the water cold for us,” i sat up for the 3rd time in the space of 2 minutes and looked at him. “nice glasses.” he teased. “thanks.” i gave him a fake smile.

i couldn’t tell if he was being sarcastic or not they were the iconic simple black raybans.

i walked over to the hot tub, taking off the covering. “do your job.” i crossed my arms. matt laughed. “such a pretty attitude.” he walked past me and turn the hot tub on. i rolled my eyes and looked out at the view infront of us while matt did his job.

“should be good to get in.” matt picked up his bottle of beer, taking a gulp. “alright.” i dipped my foot in.

“ohhhhhhh fuck,” i moaned putting my head back in pleasure. the cold water hitting my skin felt so good against my boiling body. matt followed in after me. “so,” i clicked my tongue. matt looked at me while licking his teeth. his teeth and lips were so perfect fuck. “what’s your body count so far?” i crossed my arms. he shot me a glare.“i’m not as bad as you think i am y/n, i just like to feel good,” he put a wet hand through his dry hair. “yeah sure matt, does that mean by being inside every girl that you make eye contact with?” i tilted my head and smirked. “i’d bet you’d love it.” he raised his eyebrows and shot me a smile. “yeah, no thank you.”

i layed down on the couch in my bikini scrolling through different social media’s on my phone.

matt drained me in the hot tub. all he did was try to flirt with me and try to get me to accept to let him fuck me, so i left. it was way cooler inside from the blaring AC.

“we’re backkkkk!” nick sang while walking upstairs from the garage. i put my phone down and sat up. “did you get bottled water?” “i’m dying,” i followed nick into the kitchen. “yeah, sam and chris are bringing the groceries up now, i didn’t want to carry anything!” he chimed. i let out a small laugh before nick asked, “where’s matt?” “he’s in the hot tub,” i looked outside at him. “oooooo, i wanna get in the hot tub, “please tell me he’s not a psychopath and it’s cold?” “it’s freezing don’t worry.”

it was around 9pm. everyone was tired from the sun. all of us were in the living room, me laying on the cold floor, nick and sam sharing a arm chair, chris and matt both sprawled out on the big couch. my arm draped over my eyes while we talked while chris’ playlist while lowly playing on the tv.

“we’re off!” nick yawned. i pulled myself to sit up. “don’t go to bed too late y/n!” sam called out.

“i won’t thanks mom!” i called back.

after awhile of chris yapping to me and matt, i decided to head upstairs and going to bed.

it was 4am, i went to use my bathroom until i noticed there was no toilet paper. i groaned and made my way to my bed to grab a t-shirt to put on.

i threw on a baggy t-shirt before opening my door and making my to the bathroom. i rubbed my eyes and pushed open the half-closed door infront of me.

"fuckkkkk,” i heard a deep groan. i rubbed my eyes again. matt standing in the shower touching himself. he didn’t notice me. i quickly turned around before i heard him moan my name. no. no. no. i needed to leave. i quietly shut the door and ran back to my room.

i anxiously sat on the side of my bed biting my acrylic nails. that fucker was thinking of me while jerking off. i sighed before waiting until i could hear matt’s footsteps.

i walked out of my room to matt with a towel wrapped around his waist, wet hair and water droplets all over his body. i gulped. “showering at 4am?” i questioned. “i like night showers y/n,” he stopped. “oh yeah, i bet you do matt,” i jokingly winked. “wha-” i cut him off. “it’s okay matt, you get off to me,” i crossed my arms. “n-no, no i don’t how would you know?” his face was covered with confusion. “i have ears, anyway im going to use the bathroom,” i walked past him. he quickly grabbed my arm. “no, no,” “y/n tell me what you heard?” he quirked his eye brows up. “matt i’m going piss myself.” “i’ll see you in the morning then.”

i made way back into my room. i jumped seeing matt sitting on my bed with shorts on. his phone screen lighting up his face. “what the fuck are you doing in my room matt!” i whisper-yelled.

he smirked. “i think we should recreate what you suppose heard in the shower,” i rolled my eyes. “matt,” i sighed. “go please, i’m tired and i don’t want to fuck you sorry if that bruises your massive ego, but your probably a walking form of chlamydia,” i made my way to the opposite of my bed.

he turned and looked at me. “come on baby, i’m clean i get tested im not stupid,” he layed down on my bed, resting his hands behind his head. i layed down beside him. “i’m going asleep matthew,” i placed my head down onto the pillow behind me. “mhm,” he mumbled. he leaned down to me his lips hovering over mine, they looked so kissable. “you don’t know how bad i want to fuck you, you make it so hard when all i want to do is bury myself inbetween those thighs y/n,” he groaned. i clenched my thighs together which made his eyes shift down. a smirk now planted onto his face. “i bet your panties are soaked, can i check?” his fingers trailed down my under my shirt. i nodded my head. god what am i doing. 2 minutes ago i didn’t want him anywhere near me, now i want him everywhere.

he pulled my underwear down slowly making me impatient. i groaned and leaned my forehead against his bicep.

matt slid his fingers down my soaking pussy that was begging for his touch. “oh my fuck, “your soaking,” he groaned before slipping two fingers into me. a low moan left my mouth. “look at me,” he spoke. i quickly pulled my head up and looked at him. he picked the pace up hitting my g-spot making me moan loudly. “there it is,” matt whispered. all he did was hit my g-spot making me on the verge of my orgasm. “come on sweetheart, finish on my fingers.” his thumb met my clit making my orgasm come quicker. i clenched around his fingers and shivered while coming down from my high.

matt’s fingers were in his mouth tasting me. “you taste so sweet,” his lips finally meeting mine. i hungrily kissed him, i didn’t know i had this much energy from just coming down from my high. his right hand met my waist slowly pulling my shirt up. “take it off,” he mumbled. i quickly took my shirt off before placing my lips back onto his. his hands met my nipples. he pulled his lips away from me before placing his warm mouth onto my nipple slowing sucking it. “matt,” i moaned eyes rolling back from the pleasure. he pulled away from me. “that’s all i wanted to hear from the moment, i met you.” he grunted. “fuck me, please.” “as you wish.”

he was massive. i didn’t know if he would be able to fit inside of me.

he lined himself up with my entrance. “ready?” his chain hanging over me. i nodded my head. his head slowly entered me before pushing his whole self into me. “ohhhhh,” i let slip out. “you ready baby?” he asked again before kissing me. “mhm.” i mumbled.

matt was pounding into me roughly and i wouldn’t want it any other way. god he felt so good inside of me. i have been missing out.

he slowly pulled out of me finishing all over my stomach. his load tripping down my hips. i quickly picked it up with my fingers and placing my fingers into my mouth. the salty-sweet taste entering my mouth. “i think you were made for me y/n, you feel way too good.” matt mumbled into my neck.

[mcshizzle-the-fire-boy]

pjo characters as weird and dumb things me and my friends have said

Percy: what the fuck is cockblocking like I can't block ur cock on Snapchat

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Will: UUUUUUUGH MY ASS HURTS- ooh look a butterfly

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Leo: I CANT FIND MY PRETTY STICKER- AW FUCK- SHIT- MY VAGINA- OOAOoOoOOooAHAHHAgh

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Jason: I can't actually believe I just agreed with you but hey here we are

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Reyna: why the fuck am I friends with any of you hoes

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Piper: should I...? too late I did it

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Will: the best way to rizz someone up is by rizzing them up *turns to friend, winks horribly* hey baby girl

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Rachel: one sec getting my anger out *aggressively splatters paint on canvas*

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Annabeth: sometimes I'm smart. When I'm smart, I'm smart. *awkward thumbs up and grimace*

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Octavian: fuck the gays they should all die ... I mean I could fuck some gays

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Hazel: I'll make you tea but not in a sweet way I'll make it so hot in burns your tongue and you can't speak for a week

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Frank: hey guys check me out I'm a furry on drugs *WOOOF WOOF BARK BARK BARK WOOF WOOF*

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Grover: I love plants :3 specifically magic mushrooms but like

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Leo: I mean I would totally fuck you but like respect man

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Will: Ugh fuck my life I hate everything *coldplay starts playing* I retract the previous statement I fucking love life

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Jason: UGH UR ALL SO DUMB but I'm in

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Nico: if u wanna kys clap ur hands *rapidly claps hands*

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Piper: *hypnotizes u with my beautiful blue orbs* come over to my house

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Hazel: respectfully hope you die <3

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Frank: I'm on acid what's it called when a ton of cats jump on each other a dog pile or a cat pile

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Reyna: OH THANK GOD- sike I don't believe in that motherfucker hahahha

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Annabeth: I'm so smart *holds up the one good test I got in school* see the teacher even gave me an 11/10 because I wrote my name in a cool font

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Leo: UUUUUGGGGGHHHH IM SO HORNY- *mom walks in* oh hi mom how are you

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Will: we can just... fuck. as friends though no homo.

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Rachel: IF I DON'T DRAW SOMETHING IN THE NEXT FEW MINUTES I AM GOING TO MAUL SOMEONE

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Octavian: you all suck and I hate you *silence* no wait come back

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Someone: haha ur gay

Nico: yeah??? and ur not?? like don't knock it until you try it dick is yummy man

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Hazel: someone just told me what smearing is and honestly I kinda wanna die *fix you by coldplay starts playing* LMAO WTF

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Frank: you sad ass emo dog just be happy

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Percy: I Am OnE wiTh ThE oCeAn AnD HopEfuLLy aLL oF ThE hOt MerPeOpLe In iT

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Leo: *talking to literally nobody* hey guys!! gonna go get my top surgery! *shows up at claires*

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Reyna: I only wanna die sometimes and that's normal right

RIGHT

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Will: *playing guitar* haha look guys I'm fingering A minor *strums violently*

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Jason: screw men *eyes widen* I should start taking my own advice ngl

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Will: *listening to a playlist that Nico made him* ugh my emo ass boyfriend and his stupid music I hate him *proceeds to write his name over and over again in diary with hearts around it*

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Nico: what if I strangle someone with a pair of earbuds

Will: please don't

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Leo: *in demonic voice* LeAf *eats it*

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Nico: *pulls gay flag out of pocket* omg it's u

Will: *shuffles around in pocket, finds condom* ... it's u, vanilla flavoured

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Leo: my name's Leo

Percy: and I like jugs

Nico: I'm mentally ill

Leo: and I'm on drugs :D

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Jason: is there anything better than pussy

Piper: I thought you where gay

Jason:

Jason: my boyfriend's trans?

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Will: the temptation to fuck an emo boy rn is killing me

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Leo: the masculine urge to

Leo:

Leo: I forgor

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Will: that's good!

Nico: like me in bed

*silence*

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Leo: smash or pass Ryan Gosling

Nico: SMASH

Will: PASS

Solangelo: *glares at each other*

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Nico: omg stop with that song

Will: but

Will: but you can take me hot to go :(

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Annabeth: yeah

Percy: yeah

Annabeth: *in funny voice* yeah

Percy *hentai moan* yEEEAAAaaH

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Leo: *pointing at Nico* EEEEEEWWWW AN EMOOOOOO EWWW

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Jason: never ever look up what an eyesha erotica lyric means

Reyna:

Reyna: oh you poor soul *pats back*

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Nico: I can't breathe

Will: just

Will: breathe air

Nico: I breathe drugs

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Piper: I'm gonna go play basketball

Leo: haha play with my balls

Jason: already do

Leo: *chokes on air*

well that's all sorry for the torture, thanks to @localcosplaymushroom, @crowwolf8, @justagremlinoncaffeine, and @secret-mewtwo for all of the funny convos that went into this

[hoonzsn]

LAST LOVE — “i’ve loved you for as long as i can remember.”

✦ SYNOPSIS — in which two close friends say their hidden feelings for each other at a supposed hangout.

PAIRING ୧˚ — best friends to lovers, mutual pining — jungwon x reader.

GENRE *ೃ — pure fluff, comedy (ish), oneshot

WARNINGS ｡˚ — slight cursing

WORD COUNT . ୭ — 1128

SONGS ⋆.࿔ — is it over now - taylor swift, get you - daniel ceaser, kali uchis, perfect night - lesserafim, cool with you - new jeans, hurt - new jeans, what you heard - sonder, a night to remember - laufey, beabadoobee, night train - milena, seasons - wave to earth, les - childish gambino, la leçon particulière — francis lai, christen gaubert, could’ve been - h.e.r, bryson tiller, blue - the neighbourhood, void - the neighbourhood , west coast - lana del rey

TAGLIST ₊⊹ — @ohsjy

The beach ripples crashed softly against the white sand, causing each time it did so to make a light “splish” sound. The comforting aura caused him to walk closer to the scenery, his mind racing to someone special as he did so.

The moon ever so slightly shone on the ocean, the darkest of the gloomy blue water suddenly turning into a majestic silver field. The specks of silver sparkles on the sea, catching his attention.

With every step closer he took toward the mesmerizing scenery, he wished more and more for her company. A low and deep breath left his lips. He contemplated whether he should call her and invite her, or just leave it be.

A few moments of complete silence went by before he slowly took out his phone from the pocket of his jacket. His cat-like eyes scrolled up and down in search of the contact he had saved her number with. Freezing as he found it.

It was never like this.

He never knew he’d feel overwhelmed by calling his closest friend over to the beach. Although he did feel nervous around her sometimes, but that was explainable, right? Of course, he had to try and ruin their friendship of five years due to his stupid crush.

But that is what jungwon does. He had to let it out, tell her how he felt whenever he saw her flirting with some other boy who wasn’t him. He wanted her to at least know, whether it be she had the same feelings for him or if it was merely to let her understand how he felt about her.

His finger lingered a slight moment on top of the call button, pressing it after a little while. As he heard the line ring for a few seconds, he could hear someone picking it up and answering it with a short and confused “hello?”

Clearing his throat, jungwon answered back, internally face palming as a stutter left his lips. “Hey”

A smile tugging on his delicate lips, yet knowing she couldn’t see him. “Are you free tonight?” he nervously inquired, thinking about the multiple replies she could give him.

His cat-like eyes widened in surprise as he immediately got the response he’d been wanting from the girl on the other line. “No, im free. Why?” Hearing those words come from her made his smile grow bigger.

“Oh, I just wanted to know if you wanted to hang out.” His lips parted in hesitation before continuing what he was about to say. “I need to tell you something.” A few moments went by before he could hear slight shuffling coming from the other line.

“Yeah, sure, where should I meet you?” She asked back, putting on her zip-up sweater as she did so.

He thought for a few moments before speaking. “I’m at the beach right now, but I can come to your place.”

Earning a light giggle from her side. He could feel a slight blush rise on his cheek due to the melodic sound. “Alright won, I’ll see you then.”

The walk to her home was quite short since she lived relatively near the beach. Causing Jungwon to be more excited than usual to see her.

As he saw the familiar house in front of him, he came to a stop. Seeing the girl already waiting for him in front of the gates. He walked in front of her, watching her as she looked intently at the device in her hands, mumbling some incoherent words every few seconds.

“What are you doing?” he asked once he stood in front of her, causing the girl to curse in surprise.

“What the fuck! You scared me” Her startled expression made his smile form again, the deep dimples on each side of his porcelain cheeks visible as day. Earning a smile from her too.

“Sorry, not sorry” He chuckled, causing her to roll her eyes and lightly hit his arm. A slight frown appeared on his lips as she did so, making her hang her arm around his neck.

“Let’s go, hm?” she started roaming the dark streets with the company of the boy beside her.

Once they were finally back, both of them had each of their ice creams as he’d bought them on the way back. They enjoyed their little treat quietly as they walked back.

Jungwon's eyes ever so slightly gazed at her as she was enjoying the ice cream he’d bought her. Her eyes looked straight ahead as they crinkled up due to the grin plastered on her lips while watching the ocean water crash against the white sand.

“So…” she started, looking at him now. “What did you want to tell me?” Her head tilted to the side, noticing that his breath had hitched.

“Um..” thinking for a short while, jungwon decided not to tell her, as he was too afraid of all the possibilities of her reaction.

A frown formed on the girl's lips after he said so, her eyes squinting at him in an intimidating manner. “Tell me won, come on.” She whined, trying to get a response out of him.

His brown, shiny eyes lowered to look down at his feet caressing the beach sand with his shoes, before mumbling out some incoherent words she could quite frankly not make out.

Confusedly, she had tilted her head to the side watching as his lips were continuously moving yet she could barely make out a word. “What did you say?”

Watching him as he slowly shifted his attention from the ground to her, she furrowed her brows together.

“jungwon, what did you say-“ Her words got cut off, by the loud tone of the guy in front of her.

“I love you.” His eyes lingered on hers, watching in anticipation of what she would do next, not daring to let out a breath due to the tension between them.

The air between them became suffocating as he watched her chest slowly heave up and down. Her eyes widened in surprise at the sudden confession.

“I have loved you for as long as I can remember, yn,” he added to it, slowly moving closer to her as he gently tried to hold her hand, still not getting a response. As he slowly starts getting more anxious by the second, he suddenly lets all his feelings out to her.

“It makes me go insane whenever I see you with some other guy that’s not me, and I know I don't have the right to, but,—” Without a moment to think, he could feel her soft lips collide with his, gently moving together in sync.

Slowly pulling away, she looked at him, a smile already evident on her lips.

“I love you too won.”

AUTHOR NOTE; im alive bbgs!!! wow what can i say… my first oneshot that i finished😭 are u guys proud😏 ANYWAYS IM KINDA PROUD OF THISS its cute 🥰 if u guys have any scenarios or any specific like oneshots u guys want me to make just message me or say them here and i’ll be sure to make them!!! <33 also tysm for 54 followers thats literally crazy ALSO I DIDNT FORGET ABOUT PICKY PICKY AND SHRIEK.. im working on themmm i’ll do my best to hurry!!! so for now you guys are getting shorter oneshots and scenarios😏

[oplishin]

tag game etc

tagged by @solo-uno !! thanks :]

shuffle your on-repeat playlist, then list the first 10 songs

(my current on repeat playlist is. exclusively wrestlers' entrance themes which is boring so. ima do the playlist i usually listen to when i haven't lost my whole min

1)Hurricanes by Rina Sawayama

2) Another Day of Sun from La La Land

3) Brand New City by Mitski

4) Watch Me Shine (Bianca Belair) by CFO$

5) A Lovely Night from La La Land

6) Sky's the Limit (Sasha Banks) by CFO$ (i think)

7) Curses by The Crane Wives

8) Cult of Personality by Living Colour

9) Verbatim by Mother Mother

10) Feed the Machine by Poor Man's Poison

okay the original prompt was "your top 15 favorite shows" but i hate watching shows, so i'm gonna do my favorite video games instead because that seems more representative of. me

Breath of the Wild: the game that turned me into a Gamer

Who's Lila? has a very sweet spot in my heart, as just a very well made small experience that was suitably numb and pretentious but also very emotional

Spiritfarer: waghrsh wahr

Hollow knight: i fucking love it

Inscryption: game play loop breaks my brain

Norco: my brain keeps coming back to this game months after I played it, tiny good indie game with gorgeous art and capital F feelings about living in a tiny dying, industrially choked town. play it

Outer Wilds: sometimes the feelings in this game come back to me and i just. oomph hit in the heart and now im crying

return of the obra dinn!! good

disco elysium: god i should replay this game; it didn't really click for me the first time around but it seems like something i would like

Where the water tastes like wine: playin that right now, and i have mixed feelings about it but its definitely an experience

fear and hunger: a game that didn't really land for me as well as it did for other people but yk. its neat

minecraft: i hate playing this game on my own but i have very good memories of hanging out with my irl friends who i now miss dearly

yakuza 0; a game i have to actually go back and play at some point

the original hyrule warriors, my first video game that i ever played 8 years ago

pathologic at the very bottom of this list because i have a complicated relationship with this game but it did fundamentally change me as a person so. it's earned its spot

absolutely no pressure but here's who's getting tagged!!

@swampbestie @im-new-in-town42 @tubercloset @gayrmlin @existentialcrisisetcetera @god-is-a-dyke @sethjolras @sanpape

if you want to do top 15 for a different form of media (ex: books, looking at you K). yeah go ahead!!

[aturnoftheearth]

I KNOW!!! THE LORE IS SO COOL and i love seeing?? everyone's different takes on it?? it's really cool seeing how ppl take diff meanings from the exact same song rahshshs

FEEL FREE TO SPAM MY INBOX ANYTIME PLS...... I sent my friend one (1) lord huron song and then i was like ACUTALLY IM GONNA RANT ABOUT THEM NOW and proceeded to go off for a half hour about the lore that i did know HAHAHAHAH

YEAH TO ALL OF THIS!!!! i absolutely adore the lyric callbacks and Moments (like in “lost in time and space” when he sings “aimless searching for a long lost face” woughhhh) and the way songs fade into each other is soooo 😵‍💫😵‍💫 funny enough, i got my entire family into lord huron but the most shocking one is my dad bc i can’t name another artist from the last 20 (maybe even 30??) years that he’s loved but then boom. there’s lord huron and there he is blasting it at midnight and crying over twenty long years at red rocks 😮‍💨 but the point of that is every time we put lord huron on shuffle and the yawning grave comes on i HAVE to put frozen pines in the queue otherwise he’s so caught off guard akdjskshdkd so i DEFINITELY agree that transition is SO good. i also love the where did the time go/not dead yet, the moon doesn’t mind/mine forever, and the brother/in the wind transitions like they’re so well done and beautiful and insane !!!!! AND DONT GET ME STARTED ON THE LYRICS. the amount of times i’ve spiraled because the lyrics of one of their songs is just soooo beautiful to me…. i can never say what my favorite lord huron songs are because they truly change so much like sometimes you just happen to focus on the lyrics of a song you’ve been sleeping on and boom. new favorite. it makes me so excited (and lightheaded lmfao) to think about this new album they’re working on and beginning to tease because good god i can’t even fathom more beautiful music

[s3xtones]

omg yo i have a twin flame. it’s scary we are the exact same height. same hair colour, have the same soul in the look in our eyes. the energy between us is magnetic and intoxicating. it’s fucked up we are in ‘no contact’ right now and it’s mad because he’s recently copped my dream givenchy jeans and those fucking bat ciaga sunglasses so we have the exact same style too. it’s also scary like one of the few times i was around him the top of my head (crown chakra) was tingling like crzy!! aaand when he expressed his love by musing me and making a pair of pants inspired by me ((lmfao fashion themed cosmic love affair)) i had like a full on kundalini awakening purely off seeing the post online… his higher self always shows me specific songs when i shuffle my music and will keep trying to play the same song until i’ve listened to the lyrics so i understand how he’s feeling and where he’s at with things. the connection actually consumed my life i was so obsessed and in love with him even when i hardly knew the man. it definitely has been toxic at parts but also so pure and all encompassing like i can’t live with or without him… both of our lives have come crumbling down because we were in each others lives to trigger deep change both internal and external. it’s fucked up too because apparently he’s not ascending or doing the needed shadow work or introspection and isn’t self aware enough and still in too much ego and may never choose to change in this lifetime so i’ll probably never be with him in this lifetime and coming to terms with that fact was honestly the most wrenching thing and i’ll never cry harder than i did in those moments. he is also with a karmic soulmate currently and i can’t explain the challenges that put me through mentally too especially because the girl is so scarily similar to who i am becoming and are as a person. the dynamic of runner and chaser is so real too like i was running after him knowing what the connection meant to me and now i’m running from him knowing his not so pure intent towards me. it worries me and i question myself like surely this can’t be the other half of my soul lol feels like that one episode where rick and morty go to that spa in space and split into one toxic character and one ultra healthy character.. i don’t fully understand it but apparently my heart was meant to be broken fully open in this lifetime and he did that for me. truly triggered and activated all my gifts and my spiritual awakening and the journey is real but the obsession around it scares me too as i was a part of that naively once too.. it’s beautiful though but goes way deep. almost too deep. the telepathic communication is real too. it made me never want to move on because nothing feels like it compares but i am accepting and at peace of my destiny and i found myself and my dreams and i fell in love with everything life has to offer and god so now i am happy either way. i guess i just wanted to tell somebody who would understand because everyone around me thinks i’m just a crazy idiot when it comes to him (and i definitely was at one point) but that’s the truth . idk i guess i just wanted to share my experience with you maybe you’ll find it interesting hehe but yeah no one should envy the TF thing it’s honestly a mess and is confusing and hurts really bad but i think each experience is unique. i really feel like a wholeass woman on my own and it’s insane that the person who i love and who loves me the most put me through the most suffering. i really hope i stay as myself and never like merge with him sometimes but thats disowning a part of myself. maybe he will learn.. definitely feels like unfinished business. im just rambling at this point and i’ll probably never have an idea as to wtf is going on with it but yeah it’s also crazy like everytime i ever energetically checked in on him w tarot too he was always feeling he exact same way i was so we mirror eachother emotionally too. it’s honestly disturbing and i don’t understand it but also comforting knowing i’ll kinda never be alone in a sense.

random side notes: i really look up to you

i love checking on you and your tumblr and seeing all your realisations about life.. wise beyond your years. just a sexy cool btch 🖤🖤🖤🖤🖤 meow babe

thank you for sharing your light w the world you inspire me to b a better person .

gtg bai XOXO

Bruh u made me almost cry this really shook me to the core cause like i have definitely felt this exact same thing & been thru the journey.i tried to ignore the dependency and attachment aspect but it only grows with time. To be quite frank, i loved that. i was addicted and craved it so much cause i felt like i was at home with him and to me we WORKED SO SO SO SO WELL (to me)

because i really reallyyyy understand this i have some advice

1. Cry? Yes always, however Don’t assume he doesn’t get it or is not doing the shadow work cause for u to be able to even connect and telepathically communicate with him he is receiving u and receiving is an action!! His conscious self may not know why but his Higher Self responding is the best start. (AHHHH IM SO EXCITED FOR U. THIS IS CUTE ) Also i have not gave much thought as to why but A LOT of men play dumb to their spiritual needs n abilities if they could just really sit down n SHUT THE FUCK UPPPPP THEY MAY LEARN SUMTHIN IDK. Moving on…

2.Even if y’all don’t end up together together in this lifetime, STAY FRIENDS! Pls try even if it goes against your pride, it matters so so so much nd teaches u a lot about yourself too. with this i am not encouraging u let the relationship get super unhealthy or consuming, know when to push and pull away however i believe that staying friends with him keeps the love close n mag bring about a sooner coming together whether in this lifetime or the next. Sometimes you have to be that person to be a true mirror, the reflection, the person to tell him bout himself cause if you’re really his twin flame no one knows him like you both do and God n ancestors!

3. Destruction is a form of creation. Things must fall apart before they can come back together. Twin flames are separate because of karmic debt maybe y’all just working thru that n knocking old beliefs n restrictions in all dynamics ( family, Self, community/society) to clear the soul for the future union.

Sidenote: he’s probably just with that girl because ( pls don’t be hurt by this just hear me out) yes he’s running but there is also something on your end that is unresolved, missed or hyper fixated on that caused y’all not to be on the page right now …

or he’s just being a man who is scared of real life altering commitments and communication…both could be true but don’t strss it jus laugh it’s funny! Trust. LOL at some point she is gonna notice and want to be u like nah luv serve your purpose so he can come back home to his SENSES! LOLOr she’s gonna break his heart because she reminds him so much of the best of u as well but once he’s in too deep the rude but necessary Awakening will occur.

no one can have what was predestined, meant, divinely orchestrated until that’s what y’all both want then the prophecy changes. And at that point, it’s not bout what the physical wants , it’s more of a soul contract relinquishment thing. That’s what it says in Corinthians 13:4-8 after the love never fails part. People love cutting the verse off before the REALEST LINES but that’s a different topic.

Lol everyone around u will think you’re crazy even Him at times cause they will never see life thru your Eyes. It’s okay though because being a healer is one of the most important roles, the world will always need us so stay true to what you’ve learned and continue to learn. Yes, in this moment you are an individual woman will your own path to follow, stay true to that for u n only u cause when it’s time to be with him you’ll both be ready.

right now it’s bout YOU!💜

i love u so much thanks for sharing this with me i feel like love like this is very transformative for the best. i understand and appreciate the world and myself differently now and from what i have read u do too, it’s like reading a message from my younger Self n i live for conversations like this.

luv ya! thanks again!!! my messages are always open 4 u luvvv xx <3333

[seeb2]

anogie asked: ok but imagine g30rge was making fun of h4nn4h about “being in love with s4pn4p” because he genuinely does think she likes s4p more than him and he’s jealous. she posts him on snapchat and had a running bit with him and everything !

g30rge doesn’t really know exactly that he’s jealous but he definitely is. whenever she joins calls to make fun of him he blushes like crazy, whenever he talks to her he accentuates his accent a little bit and reverts back to the brain of “tease the girls you like” without even realizing it, whenever they’re together in person he stands with extra good posture to accentuate their height difference.

h4nn4h doesn’t really treat them any different really- she even favors g30rge sometimes when he doesn’t realize it. but he’s is kinda weird and oblivious when it comes to emotions he doesn’t really process correctly LMAO h4nn4h will drive over to their house and make a longer detour to get smoothies because g30rge wanted one. she invites him to almost every irl stream she plans even if it’s limited space. she sometimes sends g30rge little snapchats of rocks and animals and things she sees around because they remind her of him in a weird way… g30rge even noticed she’s kept all the little rock’s he picks up and gives her. lined up neatly on her dresser. and and ok like- h4nn4h jokes about d nf all the time too right? ok she KNOWS she has a crush on g30rge, and she also knows d nf isn’t real (she’s their friend, they would tell her and it’s clear to her they aren’t for whatever reasons) but she jokes about it because sometimes she gets a little insecure. her crush on g30rge is a little thing that feels weird considering he treats her kinda rude- she returns the attitude back because that’s their banter. but he’s still nice. g30rge listens to her favorite songs when she plays them, and he even texts or snaps her whenever he hears one of her favorite songs play anywhere (even from his own spotify shuffle he put on himself) He listens to her ramble on and on about random stuff and then answers “not at all!” when she asks if she’s annoying. he’ll sit in call with her for a long time while she works and excuses it as not having anyone else around (h4nn4h has known that on multiple occasions s4pn4p has asked g30rge to hang out but he skipped to stay in call with her) and it’s this cute little back and forth thing they have that’s like… UGH they’re mean to eachother because they’re jealous and don’t think anything is gonna go anywhere because of how they act- and they think all the nice things are because they’re friends when i’m reality it’s the little bit of sweetness coming out through the jealous bickering and it’s so… yes. i started blabbing about this with the intention of it ending with like jealous sex after h4nn4h invites s4pn4p to something and not him (bc of course i love making these lil ppl in my phone have sex) but i got carried away with them being cute 💀 ok yeah i love girl posting sorry i always forget until it comes up and then i think about them for days - ☕️

THIS IS SOOO GOOD hehe I like them being jealous over each other but also never making the first move bc they dont think their feelings are reciprocated :3 Im obsessed

[peachpitss]

“back in school” by mother mother is such a kris deltarune song

[rikisnuggie]

24th October | MO'S KINKTOBER

pairing: sub!chan × gn reader

genre: smut

cw: blindfolding, handjob, oral (chan rec.), reader calls chan 'babyboy'

You were laying on the bed, scrolling through your phone as you waited for your boyfriend to come home. It's been about thirty minutes since he told you he was now in his way and he still hadn't arrived at him which made you worried, so you were just about to press the call button next to his number when-

"Y/n, I'm home," you heard Chan's voice from the hallway. You smiled to yourself and put your phone away, getting up from the bed and making your way to your boyfriend. "Welcome home, babe," you said, grabbing his face and pulling him into a kiss. "Have you been waiting for me? Why are you not in bed already?" he asked, a slight frown visible on his face.

"Well, I was actually waiting for you, so we could go to bed together or spend some time with each other if you'd rather want that," you explained, taking his bag from him and walking to your shared bedroom where you placed it on the chair im front of the desk. Chan followed you into the room and you noticed how he was looking exhausted and somehow stressed.

"What's wrong, Channie?" you asked. Channie. He loved it when you called him that. "Well, things have been rough. In one of the new songs, there's a tricky step I'm supposed to ace but I just couldn't. I don't know, I just can't concentrate," he explained, head hanging low. You took your hands in yours and gave them a soft squeeze. "Hey, that's not a big deal. You have a lot going on with the comeback, sometimes even you need a break, don't you think? I know that you want everything to be perfect but sometimes you just can't get everything right at the same time. I'm sure tomorrow's gonna be better, alright?" he told him, the boy nodding afterwards. "Look at me, Chan," you said with a soft voice, the man doing as you asked. "I know you can do it. Don't stress it too much".

You gave Chan a peck on the lips and let him change his clothes into something more comfortable for sleeping. Once he was done, you both got into the bed and cuddled up under the blanket. For a few minutes, there was silence, only the breathing of the two of you audible. You felt Chan shuffle next to you. "Y/n?" he asked, being rather quietly to not wake you up in case you were already asleep. "Yeah?" you answered as you turned around to face him.

The room was dark but you could still see his face as it got illuminated by the faint moonlight. "Can you help me relieve some stress? Help me relax?" he spoke, still not even trying to make eye contact. "Of course. How can I help?" you asked and Chan nervously bit his lip, probably thinking about a good way to word it. "Oh- I think I know what you mean," you chuckled while you slowly sat up next to him. "Of course I will help you, Channie".

You hovered over the man, gently kissing his lips as he let go of the tension in his body. He quickly relaxed under you and you started to roam your right hand over his waist while the other one kept you balanced on top of him. You softly bit his lower lip and he moaned into the kiss, you taking the opportunity and sliding your tongue inside, both of your tongues dancing around each other. You pulled away from the kiss, looking down at Chan.

"You trust me?" you asked, your hand gently stroking his cheek. "I do," he quickly answered as his bambi-like eyes met yours. You smiled and leaned over to open the bedside table's drawer, taking out a silk blindfold and showing it to him. "Would this be okay?" you spoke and he nodded his head 'yes', smiling up at you.

You put the blindfold around his eyes, careful not to make it too light. "You remember your safe word, yeah? If you feel uncomfortable, don't hold back to use it". Chan nodded again. You leaned down, kissing Chan again, him a little taken aback at the sudden touch before he could kiss you back. Another minute passed before you started leaving kisses on his naked torso and down his happy trail, him squirming under your touch. You placed your hand on his visible bulge, giving it a light squeeze.

A whimper left his lips and his hand went to grab your wrist, keeping it in place. "Please, Y/n, I need it," he whined. You chuckled at his needy nature and let your hand slide inside of his boxers to take Chan's dick out, jerking it up and down a few times as the man struggled to keep his moans in. You let go if him and pulled his boxers down completely, letting them pool at his ankles.

You wrapped your hand around his member again, moving your hand up and down a few more times before he was completely hard. You leaned over him and let your tongue glide over his tip, his precum leaving a salty taste on your tongue. "F-fuck," Chan whimpered at the feeling, unintentionally thrusting upwards. You continued to tease his tip, wrapping your lips around it and sucking on it before releasing it with a 'plop'. "Y/n, please don't tease," Chan cried out, making you chuckle. "Fine, I'll stop the teasing".

You went down on him again, licking his whole shaft up to his tip and closed your lips around him, slowly bobbing your head up and down. You placed your hand on the base to stroke everything that couldn't fit into your mouth and Chan choked on his spit as he tried to stay quiet. You sped your movements up, head going a little further down than before while one of your hands went up to hold his for comfort, your fingers intertwined with his.

"Close. I'm close," Chan whimpered and he squeezed your hand hard, needing something ro hold onto. You felt him twitch in your mouth and you took your mouth off his member, jerking him again at a fast speed, his moans and whimpers getting louder as his sweet release came closer and closer. "You can cum, Channie," you whispered, squeezing his cock tightly and he came, releasing his cum on your hand and some of it on his stomach. You slowed your hand down, eventually coming to a stop as Chan tried to calm down.

"You did so well, babyboy," you smiled, placing a kiss on his forehead and removing the blindfold, putting it aside. "Wait here, I'll be back in a second," you said as you got up, getting a wet cloth and tissues to clean him up. When you were done, you got in your bed as well, covering both of you with the blanket. "Thank you, Y/n," he said, his voice small. "You're welcome," you chuckled.

"Let's get some rest, yeah? I'm sure today was exhausting and you should definitely get some sleep," you suggested, hugging Chan's waist. "Yeah, you're right. Goodnight, Y/n," he mumbled, already tired from today's events. "Goodnight, babyboy. I love you," you whispered. "I love you too".

Kinktober Masterlist

[astradis]

hello! can i get a match up? ahhh here's the stuff about me :]]

name: lana / ruth

personality: im an infp, my friends describe me as nice and easy to get along with. im also shy especially with strangers and dont talk most of the time and i like to be alone sometimes. i can be clingy and needy but i dont make it obvious.

zodiac: im a taurus!!

appearance: i dont know how to describe my skin tone but i think its tan. i have long straight black hair and i have pretty big eyes. i like to wear shirts and shorts, just anything comfortable and i wear eyeglasses. my arms and legs are kinda hairy which i dont really like about myself.

uhhh here's an extra: i really love drawing, music, and cats they're all a comfort.

for the age range or something, could it be one of the the boys in the party? (mike, dustin and lucas. im also a minor but i prefer not to specify my age)

i hope its good enough <33

aww you are so cute 😭 thank you so much for your submission! you know who i think would be literally OBSESSED with you?

MIKE WHEELER

you two would be pretty awkward at first- considering mike is… well, mike! but that’s okay, because you two would slowly warm up to each other. it takes him a while to get used to having you around, since femme people have never really been his forte up until you came along.

he finds out you’re a lot more interesting than he originally thought. your like for music gets to him, and he starts to listen to the things you like when he sees you doing it. it’s a little funny- he wouldn’t ask for the music you recommend- he would just try his best to hear whatever you’re listening to, and when he goes shopping for cassettes, he literally just tries his best to replicate the songs he’s looking for. eventually you’d catch on, walking into the store as he does so. you stifle a laugh and he turns, seeing you there with your hand over your face to hide the amusement you got out of the whole situation. he tries his best to explain himself but really, he just wants to hear you laugh a little more.

when you two officially get together, he would be a pretty bad boyfriend. not that he doesn’t love you or something, cuz he does! a lot! it’s just a little hard for him to say how he feels sometimes. he talks in code a lot, and it takes you a while to catch on, but eventually you two come up with enough code for one another that you don’t have to fully explain how you feel, but perfectly demonstrate it through your, what you like to call, ‘milana’ code.

-

“Mike?” You turn to face your boyfriend, who is sitting next to you, fiddling with the walkie-talkie in his hands. “Is everything okay?”

“Huh? Oh, um, yeah,” Mike shrugs, brushing off your concern and continuing to play with the antenna.

“That means it’s not.” You catch him, shuffling closer to him and hoping he opens up. “The party?”

He sighs, putting it in his lap, a sign you were getting closer to the answer. “Apparently, because I hang out with you more than them, I’m not a member anymore.”

“What? That’s insane,” you put a hand on his. “That’s… not nice. Well, hey, listen. Who cares? We don’t need ‘em. I’ve got you, you’ve got me.”

Mike looks you in the eyes and huffs what you assume to be a laugh. “Lana, I hate to say it, but you’re right.”

“Of course I am,” you smile. “Let’s go out to the playground or something, yeah?”

“Um, is it fine if we stay in?” He asked, biting his bottom lip slightly. You nod and place a kiss on his cheek.

“Yes. Yes, it is.”

[bbhyeoliskooks]

«❝ 𝐈'𝐥𝐥 𝐍𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐫 𝐋𝐨𝐯𝐞 𝐓𝐡𝐢𝐬 𝐖𝐚𝐲 𝐀𝐠𝐚𝐢𝐧 ❞» - PT. TWO

Yeonjun was the one to break up with you, so why does he want you back now?

➸ check part one out here!

«────« ⋅ʚ♡ɞ⋅ » ────»

Pairing: Yeonjun x Reader (female)

Genre: 335 cups of fluff and 3 cups of angst

Warnings: a bit suggestive maybe??? cursing, eating, cheesy cringe stuff hehe, ++ unedited so there may be a lot of mistakes !!

Song: I’ll Never Love This Way Again

(YUH OMG FINALLY I FINISHED THIS REQUEST IM SCREAMING OMG??? i’m so sorry that this took so long, i know a lot of people waited for it 😭😭 and for the anon who requested this bc there wasn’t a notif- keah accidentally deleted it 😭😭. ngl i would die for yeonjun in this. ANYWAY, i hope you enjoyyy~~ i rlly liked doing something like this and yes i have to mention the happiness it gave me at 1am when i finally finished it 😌💕)

«──── « ⋅ʚ♡ɞ⋅ » ────»

As easy as it was to say compared to real life, Choi Yeonjun was a wreck. A horrible, horrible and you must’ve forget to say- horrible wreck! That is including the duration of time before and after the second time you left.

How he roused one morning to you no where in sight after a vicious night of going out was something he deeply regretted. He would do anything to go back to that day, of course. He wasn’t sure about how you were doing, but jeez did he want to see those bright glints in your eyes whenever you saw him again. To see you smiling like nothing was wrong or giggling when he finally made ticklish contact on those sensitive places or even how you’d frown before him due to his carelessness. His mind drew him back to the ungodly hour of 4am when you scolded him for the scar on his arm he didn’t seem to realize until later and the way you made sure nothing else on his body was hurt. Yeah anyone could tell that didn’t go very well considering he was a boy and you were a girl, but that wasn’t the point!

In simple terms, he missed you more than anyone he’s ever laid eyes upon and the plain truth was that. You weren’t easy to be shaken off his mind after that ordeal of getting you to himself for one, final night. It hurt him most to see the disgusted expression on your face as if you were staring straight at a pile of elephant poop on the ground, not wanting to do anything with it because it was useless and foul. He couldn’t possibly make it your fault too, which meant he shouldn’t have been surprised. Breaking your poor heart by insulting you and taking you for granted, everything was wrong with him for thinking this way!

Whether he liked it or not, his heart said differently about this matter.

Perhaps it was the way you looked that night- he could say- however, it was more than that. With your adoring, sparkling eyes that weren’t easy to miss and your stunning, contagious smile that caused ripples of happiness to fly across the room, he couldn’t blame anyone for falling in love with you. After all, he was a victim of it himself so there was no way he could’ve not in the end. All of those things were true especially, but taking in everything to account as well hanging out with you, your unique individual beauty meant nothing.

He just loved you for you. Loved? No, not loved. Loves. He still loves you for you, and he was a fool to realize it this late. He just lost the best thing in his life due to his stupidity; he knew fully well that you couldn’t ever bring yourself to talk to him face-to-face again if the two of you met again. Would you two even come to meet in the first place? That was the true question here. He and you both knew that due to your resistance and remorse for what happened last weekend that you would never permit yourself to see him. Like he said, he couldn’t blame you for that either.

And yet, why is he trying to convince himself that he’s the only one for you? Your every smile was originally because of him, but now... but now, you’d never let him hear that for one, last time. He couldn’t redo his mistakes of the past of hurting you even if he promised never to do that again. And judging this situation, destiny wouldn’t allow that to happen anyway. With all of your encounters, it seemed as if they all turned out the same way. Everything was ripped into shreds.

«──── « ⋅ʚ♡ɞ⋅ » ────»

“Wait, so you sLEPT WITH HIM?!” Soobin’s voice reached to a dangerous while the two of you paced around the hallways together, trying to quietly talk about last weekend until he so rudely screamed about your untrue administrations. You clasped your hand over his mouth in instinct, punching his shoulder as a warning to keep quiet or else. His body heaved with hearty chuckles while you screamed, telling him to keep his voice down so that you could truly tell him the whole story.

“Soobin! That’s not true; I wouldn’t do anything like that, ever!”

“Well, he’s your ex- and he’s hot, so why wouldn’t you sleep with him?!”

Now some of the students subtly shuffled around to eavesdrop on your conversation, and you groaned at the newfound attention. Just what were you thinking about telling him when sometimes he could contradict himself to be this loud?! It was steaming tea, yes, but no one else had to hear about it! You should’ve told him this stuff at lunch when the two of you were alone.

Swiftly pulling Soobin to the vacant hallway where thankfully no one else was walking, you made sure to keep your voice to a faint hush. You weren’t sure if he could hear you, but you couldn’t risk involving anyone else in this personal matter. Students passed by all around you in the other hallway, holding conversations and walking in groups which was a good sign you could actually speak normally since no one was paying attention anymore.

“So did you or did you not?” He mused, ruffling the top of your head. You pushed his hand away, rolling your eyes at his playfulness when the gravity of the situation needed to be comprehended instead.

“Soobin, I told you we never slept together in that sense last weekend. We were both drunk and shared the same bed! It doesn’t mean anything and we aren’t going to get back together,” you held your breath through those words as you watched the amused smile on his face turn into a pitiful, pouting lip. His adorable puppy dog eyes that were begging you not to get mad at him didn’t seem to work now, and you found yourself telling him off even if you didn’t mean to in the first place.

“You’re so stupid for thinking that, you know?! Yeonjun’s a jerk, I have no clue why I ever got with that bastard in the first place! God, if you never let us meet together then you know I would’ve been happy now. Just why did everything have to turn out this way?!”

The walls of your heart you tried so hard to buttress through your words and actions crumbled with every second you spoke, disintegrating into pure dust the moment your voice leveled to reach your anger. Your chest was trembling as you choked out the last few words, unable to say anything anymore as a lump appeared in your throat. You hated being weak in front of him the most because he’s seen you so many times like this before and he’d very clearly think of you as a crybaby.

He seemed to understand this, shooting you a gently smile as some small encouragement. It was that smile that urged you to snap out of your evil trance immediately. For saying all those rude things to him, it was contradictory since at that very moment you wanted to take everything back. The guilt ate you up in an instant once you took in his dumbfound yet soft expression, causing you to envelope him in a warm embrace as contrition. He never deserved this treatment when it wasn’t even his fault anyway.

“I... I’m sorry, Soobin. I shouldn’t have taken it out on you. It’s just so hard on me now since I know I shouldn’t have done that with him last weekend. We didn’t do a lot, and yet I still want to say that I love him...? Even now I won’t allow myself to cry and be weak but,” your voice faltered as your body slightly shivered, “I can’t do it. I just can’t be strong anymore. It’s so hard.”

Soobin sighed, generously allowing you to lean on him like last time. You were so strong- you had always been so strong in front of him, and it hurt him to see that you were slowly breaking no matter how much you tried to stop it. He could see right through the so called smile you shot him this morning as soon as you saw him. He knew right then and there that something happened to you during the weekend and when he heard it was all about Yeonjun... he had to contain himself not to beat up his best friend or else the friendship he treasured dearly would crash, fall, and wouldn’t withstand.

However, the truth remained. Little by little, you were shattering due to Yeonjun’s actions and he could only watch helplessly as you flew freely to the ground. It was an understatement to say that he was starting to hate his best friend for doing this to you, but in the end he believed you. If you did it before, then you could do it again right? And you knew that Soobin was always right there for you no matter what.

Last month you gave it your all in order to move on. He truly admired that you kept running and running towards the future even if you felt that there was no end, a quality he secretly cherished of you. As a person, you were strong in your own way and Soobin was proud of you. He just didn’t know how to say it now without making the bright atmosphere droop. It was always like this whenever a problem with your relationship arose. He brought you closer to his arms.

“You’re not weak at all for crying, Y/N. I think you’ve been holding it for too long now. You’re always welcome to come to me, alright? I’ll save you from that stupid Yeonjun and make you happier than he ever has! You deserve someone much better. You and I both know this.”

He wiped your every tear which streamed against your cheek with his thumb gently, and somehow you finally smiled. Ardent, genuine, and sincere, your smile was enough to cause another one of his own towards you, a great deal of blinding happiness all around you. You were sure Soobin was waiting for this after a while, although it came out at a surprising time. You didn’t expect it either.

This was another feeling you couldn’t ever get enough of, for it reminded you of the time when Yeonjun asked you to be his... but comparing it to this wasn’t right at all.

No words were spoken between the two of you, but it really did mean a great deal of comfort to you. How could he offer up this ample amount of support towards you? You made a promise to yourself to make it up to him one day.

A few minutes later, you reluctantly pulled away from his sweet hug to check the time on your phone. You weren’t sure how long you’d been holding each other like this (and you really did enjoy it), but if you kept dawdling then you would miss every single afternoon class. Your eyes scanned through the upper numbers.

Crap. You already missed the first few minutes!

You scrambled to get yourself off him, pulling your bag over your shoulder in a haste. “Wait, I’ll tell you the details later!” You waved your hand for a flimsy goodbye, rushing to get every paper in your bags in check. It was a pathetic bye, that was for sure. You rushed out before Soobin could even mutter a bye, hoping to get there in good time so that you wouldn’t embarrass yourself in front of everyone. Oh, well. You’ll see him later.

Your footsteps faded away little by little and yet another set rippled through his ears through little clacks on the spotless floor. He wondered if you were coming back to ask him something but before he could turn around, sweet words that were due to a familiar tone made his heart stop in place.

“Please, take care of her for me.”

...

Upon hearing that voice Soobin halted in his tracks, looking back at a pair of warm, brown eyes that met his own. By the looks of it, he heard everything you said. Not to mention that it was the second time the boy eavesdropped at that.

“Soobin, please? You can date her even if it hurts but just please... if I can’t look after her, then who else’ll take her to her favorite restaurant?”

The pleas did not matter to him all the more, if he was being honest. This game was something he didn’t want to be involved in but looks like fate had its plans. It was obvious now. He hated this and although he said you deserved better, it was clear that the two of you were destined to be together.

«──── « ⋅ʚ♡ɞ⋅ » ────»

The door clamorously creaked as soon as you entered, making you cringe at the sudden but minimal heads that turned towards you. You shyly offered up a smile, reorganizing the books in your hands to pass off some of the attention somewhere else. Some of the people there were doing their own things and focused on talking to each other to an extent. You sighed gratefully. Thankfully you could sit alone at a spot where no one would notice you at the top of the row.

After you wondered where the rest of the students were and the professor whom you searched for in every direction, you gave up with a relieving drop of your shoulders and decided to sit down. Glancing at the time, you muttered how stupid you were under your breath for reading the clock wrong. You were fortunately five minutes earlier, but looks like you have to wait now until the lesson starts.

Getting situated in your spot was an easy thing and you toyed with your phone when you heard a shuffling of clothes sitting next to you on the right. It wasn’t such a good time to be socializing right now since you felt like crap but if you were going to make new friends, you might as well do so now. After all, college was supposed to be a good experience minus all the endless assignments and projects to prepare for your future.

You managed to steal a look at the person who sat right next to you but became paralyzed in your spot when you realized who it was, whipping your head where you wouldn’t be able to get distracted by him. That dazzling, blue hair was unmistakable. And the perfect, rosy lips were too! How could you not be tainted when he chose to sit next to you?! Seeing as the latter was impossible when you heard his deep voice murmur the words ‘good morning,’ a bead of sweat collected at your forehead. He was never this bold before after you broke up, and you pondered if he wanted to be good friends again after what happened. The audacity was unbelievable.

You couldn’t understand why he’d choose to be beside you when there were many more other open spots in the room. He must’ve been mocking you, making fun of you after how weak you looked a few days before.

The question was though, why the hell was he sitting right there?! Right next to you?! You could feel the words becoming stuck in your throat as you choked out a good morning back, too anxious to say anything or else it’d initiate a conversation between the two of you. That was the least thing you wanted to do as of now, wasting all your energy on the time spent convincing yourself he’d make up some small talk. That time however never came, and you were left politely smiling at the one and only Choi Yeonjun when you randomly found him staring at you.

The professor finally arrived, lifting off a heavy burden on your chest when you could’ve been dreading the lesson instead. You should’ve left before as to not create any conflict, but anymore absences and your future would’ve been as good as dead. Although you could look at the bright side now! Yeonjun wouldn’t be able to talk to you or else he’d miss some important things which would in turn affect his grades. You threw a grateful smile towards the center of the cavernous room, becoming a little bit relaxed even if some part of you was still freaking out he was that close to you.

The class was a blur, pointless information echoing throughout the room you didn’t care to learn since you were dozing off. Your mind was too busy looking back at the events that went down last weekend, becoming more tired with every second that passed. It was hard to get your brain off that addicting stuff called overthinking every single time you caught Yeonjun staring at you with tender, soft eyes. Simultaneously, you were hoping no one would call you out for daydreaming of what could’ve been, so you hid behind a tall person’s blonde head, hoping not to be caught.

Sadly, you were brought back to the room when a chorus of sighs collected together to make a violin whimper of disappointment.

“You will be working with the person beside you on the right,” the professor declared, clearing their throat while most of the class groaned altogether. Wait so that means...

In an instant, everything seemed way too overheated in the room now. Were you the only one feeling hot or what?! You knew fully what was supposed to come next since you were the only two sitting on the top, the rest of the bottom being filled out by tons of people who were tuning in to the lesson.

Sometimes life doesn’t work the way we want it to. That itself was obvious. Otherwise you’d be somewhere else being happy instead of working with this jerk!

You couldn’t help the frustration of curses you thought in your head, glaring at the boy who was giggling cutely to himself.

“Oh, looks like you’re paired up with me! I can’t wait to work with you, Y/N~” The tone of his voice made your heart skip a beat, the all too familiar teasing getting to your head. As you expected, whatever he said would have an effect on you, instantly making you heat up at how true that statement was.

Smiling, you gulped, feeling too parched all of a sudden. God only knows how much you wanted to get out of there right away. You were dying not to embarrass yourself, collecting your books together as you slathered a polite tone to your voice. Somehow you got the words out despite making clear eye contact with him way too long for your own good. It felt so wrong to say he was a masterpiece but it felt so right to keep looking at him like this.

“Where should we work?” Yeonjun asked once more.

He leaned closer to you, leaning on his hand as he maintained an direct, intent gaze. Your lips formed into a straight line, hopelessly wishing he wouldn’t see how much of a mess you were in front of him. Then he licked his lips. That was the end of you! He and you both knew that it was meant to be flirtatious. Your ears burned at the sight. Well that was enough to be looking at his eyes now! You foolishly turned away.

“Hmm, how about we meet at the bakery everyday at five? Are you okay with that?” Yeonjun suggested, raising an eyebrow to comprehend your unsure expression. You nodded your head acceptingly, albeit a bit defeated. He shouldn’t have been expecting anything. You were fine with whatever place you could meet up by, but didn’t he know that you weren’t fine working with him?!

After the quiet and easily awkward atmosphere, you turned on your heel getting up from the exhausting spot. It was much too uncomfortable for you to plan out a schedule with him, and second you weren’t able to catch the directions with him chatting it up a bunch.

Of course you wanted to be mature about the situation, but it was impossible for you. If it was another person, then you would’ve been fine. You could ask around but that itself was scary too. Your heart was in a tugging predicament with you in between, and you weren’t sure what to choose. Seems like Yeonjun was your only choice now. It would’ve helped you move on but with him right there, it would be harder to really think about yourself for once. You shot him one more look, hoping it would be the last.

“Yeonjun, don’t think you’re fooling me with this flirting. You know I can’t work with you after what you said. I’m sorry, but find someone else who’ll be open to being your partner.” You opted to get up from your seat, trying to dash away as quickly and quietly as possible until he said something that made you paralyzed as you got up.

“Y/N, please wait!”

Suddenly the world stopped and in it, you could only see the two of you with Yeonjun clinging gently to you.

He grabbed your arm before you could move to another seat, holding on tightly just to make you stay. You winced at how warm it was compared to your shaking arm, avoiding his vulnerable eyes due to embarrassment. You didn’t know how you were supposed to do this project anyway when you couldn’t even look at him in the first place.

“I know, and I’m really sorry. I shouldn’t have done whatever we did while we were drunk and bothered you like that. Just... can you work with me this once? I want you to get a good grade with me.”

Gradually, his words became inaudible at the end, as if too ashamed to say it out loud. It was an understatement to say what he said was surprising. Therefore you couldn’t help but gasp at how vulnerable he got when you tried to move away from him when you thought he would’ve let you go after what happened. It was clearly too much for you to see his adorable puppy dog eyes, glistening and sparkling with sincerity when you safely decided to look back at him, feeling weak in the knees with uncertainty of what to say.

And although you wanted to say no so badly, you spoke without thinking and murmured something only he could hear.

“Okay then... Let’s do well.”

«──── « ⋅ʚ♡ɞ⋅ » ────»

Before you knew it, five pm rolled by and you were face-to-face at the bakery where Yeonjun was waiting for you. At this point, you were reluctant to go through with this since you could easily say you hadn’t found anyone to do the project with. But knowing that the teacher was stubborn and hardheaded when they made plans like these, it would be impossible to convince him to let you work alone. Plus, you actually got ready instead of throwing your favorite hoodie this time! You couldn’t let all your extra effort and special preparing to go to waste just because it was Yeonjun.

And gosh, you just had to remind yourself it was Yeonjun again.

The advances were simple. You had brought all your heavy books relating to the subject, hoping they’d be able to help but now all they seemed to do was weigh you down from getting the door. The wind was heartless, sending icy gusts through your clothes as you heaved out a sigh. It would’ve been good if you just left now instead. But this would only make matters worse. You swiped your phone again, purposely ignoring the contact name of ‘Stupid Mean Jerk Jjuniebug.’ He hadn’t texted you yet saying he was there so you hesitated a tiny bit before reaching for the golden door handle and eventually going inside.

The warm smell of cookies, cakes, and a variety of baked breads welcomed your nose, making the corners of your lips turn up with satisfaction. Out of all the distractions in the world, the Boulangerie was such a perfect place to go to do anything, really. If it wasn’t for your stupid project, you’d probably relax and enjoy a cup of your favorite drink paired with one of the delights they had here! It sounded like flawless idea. Happily, you made a mental memorandum in your head to plan out a day with Soobin where the two of you could hang out and tell stories to each other. He would definitely enjoy this place because of all of the bread you could order.

Surprisingly, Yeonjun was there already and you assumed he was writing something important down due to the determined expression on his face. He furrowed an eyebrow, slightly biting is lip while you inched towards him. You couldn’t help the smile that arose on your cheeks because of how endearing he looked as he worked hard, holding tightly to the books in your arms when you finally came close to him.

He looked up from his little notes of hearts and bunnies he was doodling as soon as a pair of shoes made unpretentious clitter-clacks, eyes lighting up with admiration when he realized that it was you standing there.

“I ordered your favorite dessert while waiting for you. Do you still like it?”

The words got stuck in your throat. He got you something? He must’ve been thinking of your arrival too attentively otherwise there’s no way that was true, but gosh did Yeonjun prove you wrong in a second.

Glancing at the sweets before you paired with a dainty teacup of your favorite drink, a gasp left your lips that embodied awe since he still remembered what you liked to order whenever you came to the Boulangerie with him. The snow white lace of the table fabric created flashbacks in your mind and you tensed up in realization. You hadn’t come here in two months- the last time you were able to picture your last date with him. Although, that wasn’t the point at all.

You were not to be expecting anything after the two of you separated even if the two of you were exes. It was just in Yeonjun’s moral codes in life to be kind to anybody and especially you whenever he please just because it was normal to him. You adored how pure he was, but at the same time you couldn’t shake how he acted towards you almost two months ago. That hostile expression on his face- one you’d never seen before- couldn’t ever be erased from your memory no matter how much effort you put in it.

But the past was the past. No bad things could happen like that now, could it? It was all because the two of you broke up. You were exes.

And yet, you could smile freely like nothing of the sort happened towards the two of you. After all, it was the right thing to do wasn’t it? Yeonjun would’ve wanted you to do that too, you knew it deep inside despite desiring to deny it. To move on and not have any feelings of pent up frustration and anger towards each other. Joy swelled in your heart at how much maturity you were gaining because of heartbreak. Maybe the two of you could be friends. Maybe.

“Thank you so much for doing this even if you didn’t have to, Yeonjun. I’m surprised you even came since your friends are much more interesting than me. I’m glad that you did though.”

You decided to take a bite in the delicacy, immediately not regretting the dulcet decision as you relished in the simple sweetness that came with it. Honestly, you missed this wonderful, mouth watering taste so much! Just like what you remembered, you shut your eyes in pure content, not being able to take in the sight of the boy in front of you who chuckled to himself.

Yeonjun heaved a breath of amusement from his chest, cheek laying down on his hand again as his eyes showed nothing but the sincere feeling of endearment towards you. He shifted comfortably on his side, grabbing one of the crimson, bright strawberries from his plate as he bit onto the juicy tip of it.

“You know, you’re always cute when you smile like that,” he whispered, not caring whether or not you heard it- which you obviously did.

You puffed your cheeks out at this.

“Shut up...! We’re here for a project, remember? Not to... flirt, silly.”

The mischievous yet saccharine grin on his face made you flustered and you glanced away from him, pretending to look at the tray of enclosed desserts that you saw when you first entered the bakery. You couldn’t allow yourself to become distracted like this! Not to mention that looking at him straight through doesn’t seem to help either!

“Oh, but when I look at you I can’t seem to focus on anything else. I’m being serious here; I just really can’t seem to take my eyes off you.”

The slamming yet gentle sound of you slamming the spoon you were holding on the table gave everything away and his eyes turned into euphoric crescents that only signaled delight.

“Yeonjun, I said shut your trap. All these cheesy compliments and I’ll... we have to do our project, so please cooperate and let’s put our work together to actually do something good.” You pulled your books together in a pile, acting as if you were really doing something in order to distract him from teasing you. The raging beat of your heart begged to differ, so you hoped he wouldn’t hear it or else that would give him another reason to make you flustered.  

“As you wish, princess. We’ll work so well together that you’ll miss me once I drop you home!”

Princess...?

He’ll drop you home...?

You groaned in annoyance at the nickname and offer although you kind of enjoyed it, wanting to smack Yeonjun in the mouth for not listening to your request. He must’ve been deaf or something because the whole time he kept throwing coy phrases you’d never heard before or trying to whine about how much work it all was for the two of you.

You were only starting to understand how annoying he was whenever he got cranky and dozed off for thirty minutes, leaving you to search through all those books and gather information yourself which was luckily a lot of help. It was a nice silence for a while but once he got back to annoying you endlessly, you swore you could rip all your hair off from the frustration building up from inside of you.

How were you going to do a week of working with him when you couldn’t even look at him in the eye every time he made pouty, kissing lips? Or take him seriously whenever he called you a pet name for that matter? You wished future you the best luck, unfortunately not knowing what would arrive in the times to come.

...

“Hey, could you look at this for a second? I’m having trouble if I should or more exactly- how I should put this down when it makes no sense.”

You laughed at how clueless he was when it came to his favorite subject, shuffling right beside him to see what he was struggling with. It was too natural, too suspicious for the both of you not to know this. You contained the snickers of mock once you put it all together, silently calling him stupid in your head for not being able to jot down this simple effortless thing. You twisted your body towards the notes, enough for your shoulders to meet together.

Little did you know that Yeonjun only wanted you to come close to him, and it was more than suffice to say it worked out in his favor.

You were explaining everything to him but the only thing he could focus on was the little things about you. The bitty, endearing gestures of your hands while you connected two of the subjects, the way your chest heaved up and down when you took a tiny breath of air, and even how your lips opened and closed was enough for Yeonjun’s fluffy cheeks to heat up and bloom into a rosy red. The words droned off as it echoed between the two of you, easily becoming pointless since he wasn’t paying attention anyway.

A couple of seconds passed between the two of you when the bakery suddenly became silent, and he gripped the pencil he dropped earlier on the table as you shot him a shy smile. Yeonjun’s knuckles became white with every second his stare lingered on you. You were way too cute for your own good, and you didn’t even know it- so why was he surprised? He, too, was hoping you wouldn’t be able to notice the aggressive thumping in his chest.

“Yeonjun? You got all of that, right?” Your symphony-like voice snapped him from out of his trance.

“Okay, then I’ll put that down,” he breathed tiredly.” It looks like he was getting exhausted too, huh? You were about to say a few words of encouragement until he cut you off with his own.

“We’re almost done researching; just hang in there, alright? You’ve been doing so well, Y/N.”

The gentle, supporting words was enough to send ripples through your heart and you nodded your head, all the while checking through what you noted and what you forgot. You wanted to keep thinking about what he said and how it motivated you to keep going. You didn’t want to upset you and most definitely not him. However, the fatigue coating your eyes was too much and you slowly closed the heavy lids, head slowly turning to the side before you fell on something all too familiar.

A sudden yet light weight on his shoulder made him look up from what he was writing down, stunning him in his spot when he saw you had fallen asleep on his shoulder. He must’ve known that this much thinking wore you out after such a long while. A tender smile decorated his lips and he took in your every feature, hoping to draw out the face that made him feel alive.

“She’s so cute...” He grabbed his jacket from the side he’d taken off earlier, laying it gently upon you with his other hand as if it was something he’d done since the beginning of time. You nuzzled your cheek against his way too comfortable shoulder, becoming more snug with each minute that passed by. He couldn’t help the skip in his heartbeat when you muttered his favorite nickname in your sleep, this ‘Jjuniebug’ being much more different compared to the past because he knew you were dreaming of him.

When such a sight like this was to be treasured by anyone, he decided he didn’t want to work anymore. Like the gentleman he was, he gathered your books together, pushing your plate to the side before laying his head against yours. He intertwined your hands with his, grinning gently from ear to ear at the warmness he felt from inside.

He stole one more glance at you, fingers delicately dancing from your cheekbone all the way to your chin, tracing your jaw as gingerly as he could. This was what he was hoping for after such a long time of not receiving it. That itself was rightfully so, yet having you near meant the world and so much more to him.

Then he glanced out the window where rain was drizzling, creating a dreading gray atmosphere which was nothing but chaos. It could’ve been something that alerted him on such a dreary day, making him anxious at how he was going to get home in a mess. But to him, he wouldn’t trade this peaceful present. Always, he wanted to be close to you like this. It couldn’t have been too much to ask, honestly.

“Tell me,” he said to no one in particular, “how can you make a moment last forever?”

«──── « ⋅ʚ♡ɞ⋅ » ────»

Tuesday passed as quickly as Monday did and you swiftly got prepared for five pm later. You were bouncing with excitement, ready to see the boy who’d been waiting for you over at the library, a place you decided together when he texted you during lunch break. To be true to yourself, you couldn’t wait to work with him. All day you were waiting for the horrid, slow hours to pass of lectures and countless assignments online, lingering silently through the minutes that seemed to go by forever in hopes that everything would go faster. The relief you felt when you were dismissed for the day and the joy that swelled in your heart when you went home, preparing yourself as best you could.

You didn’t understand why you were buzzing with energy over meeting someone like this, for wasn’t it true the two of you were exes? Two months ago you broke up; that was quite obvious. It didn’t help that and that number one: he was a jerk after a while of dating you, and number two: he was probably playing with your heart if you decided to be smart. But then again you always rewarded that guilty pleasure by saying the past was the past and he bought you your favorite delicacy. He may have hurt you before and because of that, you promised yourself you wouldn’t ever date him ever again.

With that thought in mind you threw your favorite outfit on that you planned just the night before, looking in the mirror twice just to make sure you looked okay. Deep down you knew it was a lie to say you weren’t doing these special things for him, trying to convince yourself that in doing so- this dressing up would do your ego a favor. Yeonjun didn’t have to see this, not at all! It was all because you wanted to look decent. Just that.

So sneakily, you crept out of the house while slipping your shoes on since nobody would notice you were gone. You checked your phone at least twice before opening the door, clearly not ready for the surprising sight your eyes landed upon as soon as you left home.

In front of you was the boy who had taken your mind captive all day, smiling from ear to ear as his fingers combed gently through his blue hair.

You gasped at how he actually came to your house after teasing yesterday that he would, but you never knew he’d carry out his plan. He would keep poking your cheek while saying something under his breath like how he’d visit you one day to pick you up. He would never do that, right? Well no, you were extremely wrong and just a day after your project date went well.

Nonetheless, you couldn’t stop the touched grin on your face to know he was waiting for you.

“Hey, Y/N,” he shyly giggled and that itself made your heart skip a beat, “let’s walk to the library together today, alright? Wait, let me take your books, please!”

Even with your protests and several no’s, he still took your books and placed it snugly against his left arm, teasing about how light they were together. You glared at him for a second before taking a few steps when he suddenly grabbed your hand.

You turned around, eyes wide in a daze.

“What is it?”

An overwhelming heat rose up to your cheeks and ears, making you feel hot in the face as you realized he was still holding on.

“If it isn’t too much to ask, can I hold your hand today? I really miss the warm feeling you gave me last summer.”

He held his hand out expectantly, waiting for you to take it on your own accord. You easily obliged- albeit a bit hesitantly- putting your hand against his and allowing him to guide you to wherever- whenever he wanted. The way his eyes lit up as he lead you to the place was precious, making you feel soft with endearment at how gentle he treated you.

Now this? This was bad. So, so bad.

On the day you left Yeonjun’s house in tears, you weren’t expecting any of this to happen. You weren’t sure how you could trust him so easily after everything he’s done- maybe it was the way you felt his sincerity in every smile he sent you or how tenderly he had grabbed your hand just now, but the happiness bottling up inside you did not lie. You felt pure jubilation whenever you saw him.

«──── « ⋅ʚ♡ɞ⋅ » ────»

It was Wednesday.

Wednesday, the middle of the school days where you desperately wanted to claw your eyes out from how tedious everything was. Wednesday, a day where nothing significant happened but nothing too horrible happened either. Wednesday, a reminder that you only had two days left- counting today and Thursday- to work with Yeonjun. You hated the bitter taste of having to really say goodbye, but the future had to be on the brighter side then. After this, you swore you wouldn’t ever see him and his damn handsome face for another accidental time.

Just about reaching four in the afternoon, you decided to go with Soobin over to the Boulangerie where you’d been promising yourself to take him since Monday. It was luck on your side today that you actually went out for some fresh air, carrying out some of the awaiting plans you had on your checklist. Sometimes it was nice to have a breather in the middle of the week when everything else was distracting.

It started off as usual, and you realized you hadn’t seen him since that very day of hearing Yeonjun’s offer to be your partner. To be quite honest, you didn’t really think about telling him since it shouldn’t be that important, but the boy knew it was important just by from the hesitance in your expressions. His fingers placed the glass filled with chocolate milk on the table gently and curiously prodded.

“Y/N? You’ve been acting strange lately; is everything okay?”

You glanced up from the china plate, eyes widening with surprise. You weren’t sure what he was talking about. It couldn’t have been anything important, could it? Or were you being so obvious about your giant, giant problem?

“Yeah, everything is fine, Bin! Trust me, there isn’t anything going wrong but I guess you could say that... from your perspective.”

You made sure to look at the way he reacted and seeing how his head titled with wonder, you chose to give it a try.

“Well... I should’ve called you about this but I’m working with Yeonjun for a project. We have to turn it in by Friday, but we’ve been doing stuff on it since Monday. It doesn’t mean anything though, and we’re supposed to meet up at the park (Moonlight) today.” You intentionally left out the fact he asked you and those sweet moments since you were afraid of his reaction.

You knew he was one to be respectful and kind no matter the person, although because of all this tugging back and forth between his best friends- you couldn’t blame him for wanting to sock either one of you for being so stupid. And stupid were you and Yeonjun for not being able to get enough of each other, at least that’s how you viewed it. Soobin wouldn’t dare to hurt either one of you since the two of you were best friends; physically wouldn’t cut it. You hoped he would just remain patient like he’d always have- one thing you were grateful for, obviously, instead of freaking out at the recent moments you’ve experienced.

That being said, the look on Soobin’s face was absolutely priceless once you told him about your predicament.

“You two? On a project? TOGETHER?!”

Glumly you nodded your head, expecting him to say something but his mouth was filled with shock to the brim that he couldn’t even bring himself to say anything.

“Yup, that’s true. You didn’t know about it?” To say the least, you were surprised he didn’t know about it since Yeonjun was one to trust him about everything. Little things like this would count, yes, and you could very vividly remember how he blabbed to Soobin when you first started dating about how to keep a girl on her period happy.

In response, he shook his head, hand still glued covering his mouth. Your lips slightly turned upwards at his melodramatic feedback.

“No, he didn’t tell me anything at all about it! Why are you guys keeping secrets from me?”

Ouch, that stung. But at the same time, what were you expecting?

“That’s a surprise. I thought he couldn’t keep his mouth--”

The deafening, shuffling sound of the store bell rang throughout your ears, causing you to shudder at the intermittent sound. This was a popular Boulangerie so you didn’t need to be surprised whenever a new customer came in, but it stunned you at the worst times. You shrugged at Soobin’s suddenly ghost white reaction, thinking he was just kidding with you again and went back to the cup of a refreshing drink. Honestly, you couldn’t care less about it unless it was someone you knew.

You lifted the cup to pass through your lips until the familiar sight of messy radiant, blue hair caught the peripheral vision of your eye.

It had to be him. It couldn’t be anyone else.

“Y-Yeonjun...?”

As your heart dropped to your stomach, your voice broke out gently, making you the only person to hear it muffled with both distress and disbelief. There was no possible way you were witnessing what was happening in front of you. You didn’t want to believe it, squinting your eyes over and over again just to get a good look. It was still him no matter what you did, no matter what you changed.

Somehow, he didn’t notice you.

He sat down at a table, sending a sugary smile towards an alluring girl who sent him the same one back. Your back became rigid at the too close proximity of their faces. They chatted for a little bit about anything that could cross their minds, obviously flirting with the stares sent back and forth and back again until it turned into a full discussion- both of them laughing their hearts out. Happiness from the ideal ‘couple’ (as anyone could’ve mistaken them) spread around the Boulangerie contagiously, making everyone awe at the sight of them fully enjoying themselves. But you? You? Your heart shattered piece by piece while watching this play out.

Too many questions flooded in your mind at once as well as too many insecurities, paralyzing you in your spot as you couldn’t find the correct way to breathe again. It was getting too hard to find the air in, you realized. Soobin called your name out many times- to get you to listen, to get you out of your stupid trance, to get you to do anything else in the world but look because it’d hurt you just as much as it did for him!

To this, you were only sitting still, staring and staring like a dormant painting hanging in a museum just to find out that you wouldn’t ever be able to change anything, but only see the people in front of you. You didn’t want to look at the face of pain in front of you but... if you looked away then something else might happen.

You cradled yourself in your arms, trying to stop the icy cold breeze that whirled pass your rips and over to the tips of your toes. It didn’t make sense to you. Why even bother putting effort into winning him back? You wouldn’t be able to be as good enough. You shouldn’t have even tried in the first place.

You gulped down those insecurities again, trying to calm your shaking hands.

It wasn’t possible to be that perfect... not at all. She was such a stunning girl, the epitome of everything you weren’t and what you didn’t have. She had such sparkling eyes, such a gorgeous smile, and not to mention an impeccable complexion that had every single girl in the world jealous. Everything about her was simply perfect and that drowned your own specialties into the deepest ocean called hatred.

Once again you glanced at Yeonjun who seemed to be having fun with the deep chuckles and smiles he was freely giving up. Oh, how bad you wanted it to be you but this reminder was one that gave you a wake up call. You never really had a chance in the first place.

He then turned his head a little to the side, ultimately being able to see you sitting next to Soobin just like you had planned. His honeyed brown eyes changed from smug into something unreadable you couldn’t put your finger on before changing in a split second to look back at the girl.

The decision dawned on you, and you clenched your fists until you felt flashing, white pain run through your fingers.

He didn’t even care.

You were stupid enough to believe he actually liked you back again. You were stupid enough to think that with all these sweet interactions and words, he was warming up to you for another countless time. You were stupid to think he was being truthful that drunken night, saying he needed you clearly as much as you needed him. Finally, you were stupid enough to think he loved you. Now the proof was smack dab in your face, blinding you from your goal of hating him, and you were such a fool to be thinking he would really be yours after such a long while.

The glossy tears gathered in your eyes, angry, frustrated but pointless words with no explanation becoming more stuck in your throat when you glanced once more at the sight across from you. Time passed by through the regal clock, ringing in an ear and out the other. One way or another, you needed to get out of there and you needed it to be now.

You hastily slung your bag filled with papers over your shoulders, making sure you hid the flowing tears from everyone’s sight. Just one turn and he’d probably see you so pitiful at the wrong time. You certainly didn’t want to look pathetic, especially not in front of Yeonjun, whom you still loved with all your heart.

In a dash, you aggressively swiped the entrance of the door handle and into the day where you just wanted to disappear. Bell ringing haphazardly behind you, you weren’t able to perceive you were out of the bakery until another customer ignored your everblooming sadness, struggling behind you to get the door. Tears soon fell on the ground after holding them in for too long, signaling your vulnerability as you crouched down behind the bakery to let everything keeping your heart captive out. This time, for real, you really weren’t going to see him again even if it meant your grades being obliterated.

You hated him. You hated him so much for what he did back there.

And yet here you were, running away from your problems again.

«──── « ⋅ʚ♡ɞ⋅ » ────»

“Y/N?”

It was a mistake. It was all a mistake. You shouldn’t have pressed accept without looking at the contact name. You were just so stupid that it was funny. Just another one of the reasons why he wouldn’t ever want to date you again. How could you blame him for breaking up with you?

“Y/N, you there?”

He was seeing another girl, you should’ve known. Why didn’t you know? Why did you have to be such a fool to be used in the first place? And why the hell were you sad about it when you could be using this opportunity to be getting over him?!

“Y/N, you’re not responding and I’m getting worried. Is there something I can do? Please...?”

You were just exes. Exes, for crying out loud! Exes. That’s all.

“Y/N, if you’re there just-”

“yeah, I’m right here,” you murmured quietly, caring any less that he might have not heard you in the end. If he was able to really see how you accidentally looked at him earlier, then surely he would’ve known how the world crashed on your shoulders just by looking at you. Oh, but it was funny wasn’t it? It didn’t matter anyway. After all, he wouldn’t give a damn right? Not what he did back there he wouldn’t.

Because of that, you realized that this conversation with him was not needed. Whether it was because of the project or if it was for a favor, you wouldn’t be able to do it without looking weak in his eyes. Your finger hovered over the red button, tempted to press hang up until again, his act of using a concerned voice tugged painfully on your heart strings.

“Wait, are you okay? Do you need me to be there? Something’s wrong, I know you’re not okay,” he tried for another time, breathing through the call tiredly as if he was oblivious to what went on earlier. The hate for him smoldered in your chest, and your fingers tightened around the phone so arduously that they turned white, shaking hysterically.

“No, I...” you felt your voice break, and you covered the change in pitch by clearing your throat. With the lump so gigantic that you couldn’t even breathe, it hurt to tell him a lie, much less speak at that moment. You put on a tone to make it more believable. “Everything’s fine. Just busy right now.”

“You’re lying,” he whispered so softly into the receiver you were wondering yourself if you had heard him in the first place. You forced yourself to laugh at his statement, but it came naturally, knowing it was all too true.

“I’m not lying, I promise! I just took a nap, that’s all. No need to be so worked up over me.” You figured that teasing him would be the best way to cover up your sorrow, giggling alongside him because you were so bad at lying. Nonetheless, you hoped he would take this approach, waiting silently on the floor for his best answer.

On the other side he hummed hesitantly, mumbling a few words that you couldn’t quite comprehend because you knew he didn’t want to hear them. You barely noticed you were in the corner holding yourself, rocking back and forth as the anticipation of just hanging up crept up on you.

Before you could start, Yeonjun grumbled in concern.

“Well... okay then. But if you really want to convince me you’re fine then you’ll keep your promise and meet at Moonlight today. We still have a lot to do, so let’s meet up at the usual time. You’ll be there, right?”

“Um... I...”

What else could you say? It would be rude to decline and you weren’t in the mood to lie after all that. Well, he didn’t buy it all but at least he got off the topic. You were thankful to him for not budging, although this had to be one of the worst things he could ever suggest. Not only about how you feel in the end but about the project too. As far as you were concerned, you only a little left so you were able to work separately anyway. He didn’t have to go so far to do things his way, but this would show you he didn’t need you at all.

You spoke on impulse hastily after the long, deafening silence.

“Yeah, okay. S-see you then.”

Abruptly, you hung up before the tears could start again. Not even letting him throw in a sincere goodbye to your predicament.

«──── « ⋅ʚ♡ɞ⋅ » ────»

Just like what you remembered, Moonlight was still a breathtaking place where the golden sun shone during the day and the moon peeked out from the dim curtains of nighttime. You sighed, staring longingly at the beautiful scenery before you and sat down under one of the trees. It’d been so long since you chose to come here, especially by yourself this time. There were happy memories that came along with this place and you didn’t want to think about the bad ones, of course. However everywhere you looked, it would only remind you of him and that was the least thing you wanted to have at the back of your mind right now.

Checking the time, you made sure you didn’t arrive too early or too late. It was a few minutes after five and true to your word, you actually came. You were surprised at yourself for showing up voluntarily with your mind in such a bad condition, acting as if you were okay just for a stupid project. If you’d done this earlier, you would’ve definitely said no. Perhaps it was the way he was worried about you- although, you thought it was fishy- that you wanted to come. Maybe then you would’ve gotten the attention you wanted after all this time, with this being the final time you’ll see him.

Eventually, you saw the familiar blue haired boy arrive just a quarter after your planned time. He was panting heavily and you swore you almost felt bad for him until the image of him catching eyes with you from earlier rearranged your thought process by miles. You stood up expectantly as he ran over to you, planting his hands on his knees in order to regain breath.

“So sorry for being late, Y/N,” he choked out restlessly, taking your hands into his as an apology. He held them tightly in place, squeezing in an attempt to excuse himself for why he was late. Instantly you gasped at the contact, slowly pulling away so that he wouldn’t realize that you more or less hated his affection. At times when you’d be melting at this, you failed to realize that your suspicions were true and he was playing you behind your back.

A tight lipped smile that screamed passive-aggressiveness became of your lips and you were eager to take a few steps away from him, shuffling to get under the spot you sat earlier. You backed away a little bit but weren’t able to get far because your shoes slipped from something shaped like a square underneath you. The breath was knocked off your lungs as you fell towards the ground and you plunged back, waiting to hit the ground. That is, until someone caught you by the waist.

You opened your eyes after a few seconds of waiting and as soon as you did... you felt all the blood rush up into your face.

“Y-Yeonjun...”

You weren’t expecting anything like this. Nothing sweet like this at all! Said boy was intently gazing at you, holding you by the waist as you were too shocked to say or hell- even do anything with him this close. Your head tilted away to the side this time, trying to think of anything else that would stop the intermittent pace of your heart beats. Gossiping with Soobin about what happened just now, the way you fell at school a few years earlier and embarrassed yourself and how he helped you up out of everyone else right after, the first moment you laid eyes on him and met the blue haired boy just like that... But no, all you could think of was him, him, and only him!

He seemed to be getting a kick out of this, teasing you with an adorable smile that had you awestruck.

“Were you scared...? Don’t worry about it anymore; I’ll always be here to catch you when you fall, I promise.”

It was then that he started to lean in after chuckling at your shyness, bringing your face closer to his as his eyes ran across yours. Your breath quickened just by looking back at him turn towards you- his gorgeous eyelashes that you felt the need to count each, his nose that was sculpted by the angels, his cherry blossom pink lips you so desperately needed- memorizing every valley on his face as you had done earlier when the two of you dated. Oh wait, dated...?

In a moment, you flung yourself off him. What were you doing with him?! Whatever this was and whatever he was doing- it wasn’t right! It just wasn’t right... It wasn’t right when he was choosing to see someone else, and that girl back there no matter how much you couldn’t help but despise her- did not deserve it. It wasn’t right.

Your legs felt like jelly, unable to stand by yourself as you carried out an attempt to get away from him. It didn’t seem so long ago that you couldn’t get enough of him but now you were itching to be left alone. You wanted to deal with this yourself, not reignite the fire of the hopes that he would return back. He lost that chance and you lost the chance of loving him again- even if yes, you still did love him. It was enough for you anyway- the love he gave you before only serving as a unreachable memory. You realized you needed to relinquish him.

Immediately you pushed him off you, watching the sweet expression on his face bend into something broken. The distance between you became even farther and farther with every breath your chest heaved. You gulped.

“I’m fine. Let’s just get to work so we can finish this,” you deadpanned, bringing your books that used to be laying dormant on the green grassland against your chest, moving under the tree where he broke up with you. This way you would be able to remind yourself that it wasn’t meant to be.

Surprised by your ill nature, Yeonjun nodded carefully, deciding to ponder in his head what was making you act this way instead of asking more questions. There was obviously something wrong, but he didn’t want to bother you more. To him he was unable to think of what he had done wrong and certainly hated the tense atmosphere when you refused to touch him, much less look at him. He just went along with it unknowingly like a fool that it was because of him the whole time.

«──── « ⋅ʚ♡ɞ⋅ » ────»

It was too hard to concentrate.

Your eyes searched despondently over the materials over and over and over again to write down something- anything that could possibly benefit the project, but it didn’t help at all that your mind was still on the boy sitting in front of you. Like a mantra, the memories of him smiling with that flawless girl kept replaying in your head as many more times as you bit by bit became insane with wrenching love.

Again, you couldn’t help but steal another glance at him before quickly ducking back down so he wouldn’t be able to catch you staring. He looked so peaceful while retracing his steps in the books, laying on his hand as a stand for his cheek. You hated how he could act so fine while you were left with nothing but hate towards him. Could you even call it hate anyway? It wasn’t true at all.

Yeonjun’s soothing voice snapped you out from your daze of pity, but it did the least to heal you and your pathetic attitude.

“Hey, do you think we could rest a second? I might fall asleep here if we have to keep reading about this nonsense stuff.”

You didn’t look up from your book, allowing him easy access to rest on your shoulder as silently as he could. His heart leaped with joy in his chest, but there was no chance he’d ever say it out loud. He graciously laid his head down upon it, becoming enamoured with your scent as he reached out to touch your hand. This need of affection easily leveled the desire which screamed out he needed you, but he wasn’t sure if he’d ever get an opportunity to be yours again.

You, on the other hand, was dying to tell him you loved him- but it wasn’t right when he simply had the same love as you for another girl.

But at the same time, you wanted to be strong. You had to be strong in order to convince him you were doing fine without him even if the truth was far from that. You had to put on a mask to hide the pain you were going through just because of him and his stupid, contagious smile that makes you grin every time you see it. You had to be strong, otherwise you’d never fool him that you needed him more than anything or anybody you’ve ever wanted. You had to be strong... but why were all your actions simply betrayed you no matter what you did?

“Get off me.”

Your shoulders started to shake aimlessly, shuddering when you felt his head bury more into the crook of your skin. He must’ve not heard anything, and you clenched your jaw until it twitched with pain.

“I said, get off me!”

As hard as you could, you pushed him off you- enough that you were just inches apart from him. It didn’t compare to the distance between you that you came to note before.

The tears were hot against your cheeks and you collapsed into your shaking hands, unable to hold it in anymore. In all your life, you’ve never felt so humiliated before just because a boy lied to you willingly. You felt pathetic.

To say the least, Yeonjun was taken aback, his eyes wide with shock as he hopelessly reached out his hand to you. All the love you bore just for him crashed into waves upon your chest, and you slapped his fingers away harshly before he could even say something.

Miserably you hid your face from him, not allowing him to see such a mess that he caused by his own hands.

“Who even are you? Are you the Choi Yeonjun who broke up with me or are you someone else?! I don’t understand how you can act like this after everything that happened... tell me, are you just playing with me or something?”

“Y/N, that’s not what I meant to do...” he tried tiredly, scooting closer to no avail as you turned your back away from him.

You laughed at his words, still not being able to look at him straight in the eye.

“Not what you meant to do? You’re telling me that it’s not what you meant to do?! Then who- who was she? Because it seemed to me that you were happier with her than you could’ve ever been with me!”

The silence that broke you apart was too deafening as you caught another look at him.

“Y/N, that’s not true... just listen, please,” Yeonjun begged, gazing at you desperately with unreadable but melancholy expression that had you on edge. He knew that you wouldn’t stay if he physically bound you in his embrace, but he had no clue what to do or what to say. He just wanted- no, needed you to really live.

Your heart broke all the more at the words he tried to pick up in order to explain- which you were sure he could hear even if he seemed very far. Easily you trashed his attempt away, getting up from your spot since you didn’t want to hear anything- anymore lies that would hurt the person you tried so hard to protect and shield away from the inevitable demise of love... that was you.

Yeonjun hurriedly got up along with you, leaving the pile of your books abandoned on the floor as he rushed out to match your pace. He ran with all his might to catch up with you but every time he reached your side- you would push him away like earlier and he didn’t have time to find his breath.

“Yeonjun, leave her alone. Haven’t you done enough, already?”

Seconds later upon hearing another voice, you rushed to someone else’s side, hoping that he would be able to protect you from the danger. It was pitiful with you standing right behind him as if that would help, but it did more than what you could ever be grateful for.

Yeonjun tensed up at his spot, stunned to see Soobin when he could’ve sworn nobody else was at Moonlight. In his mind, he could see the two of you right there apart from everything else- the two friends that looked so good together... it had to be much better than him after what he’d done. He came to a thought, letting his guard down while words of Soobin asking too many questions towards you occupied his head.

“I knew it. I knew you two were dating. I-I should’ve known,” he mumbled under his breath, his morals paralyzing him in place as he dropped his gaze towards at the ground instead.

Somehow Soobin heard this muttering and smugly smirked at this silly situation, taking a fresh opportunity that could probably boost destiny’s way before hiding it with a deep frown. He pulled you flush against his chest, holding you when you surprisingly really needed it from someone else.

“You finally figured this out? Leave us alone; you lost your chance the minute you broke up with her, pal.”

As Soobin dragged you along, you took one last look towards Yeonjun and gasped when you saw along with yours- two longing eyes flowing with tears that were nothing short of love. You wanted to reach out to help him not to cry like that even if he hurt you, but it would never work out and he’d leave you just like he’d done before. This only showed that you weren’t meant to be, never in a million years.  

And with that you left with the help of Soobin, leaving Yeonjun alone at Moonlight. Time passed to the point where he gazed upon the stars- wishing that you would come back because he wanted to say he still loved you- by himself.

«──── « ⋅ʚ♡ɞ⋅ » ────»

It was Thursday, the final day where the two of you would ultimately finish this project. The death of having an obligation which ripped your heart out, for better or for worse. The demise of whatever love you shared. The end of seeing him because you really wanted- no, you needed to. Everything was over in a blink of an eye and you were left feeling bittersweet about the situation... more bitter compared to sweet because you wanted more time with him. You knew deep down inside it wasn’t too much to ask, but... ending this would be for the better. It must be.

You were on your usual pathway home from the library after trying to bribe the librarian to excuse you from losing your books (when you actually accidentally left it there with him) while along the way thinking about what to do to make a grand finish for the project. Since the two of you worked on it a lot for a few hours before you exploded on him- something you weren’t sorry for in the least bit because it got your feelings out- it was safe to say that he wouldn’t bother you about it anymore. He finished his side, you were assuming, so he didn’t have to see you for the time being unless he ever decided to talk it out with you. Other than the fact that you totally hurt him back there, it honestly served you a great victory on a silver platter as you waited for the dragged out day to be over.

It was petty, of course it was! But after what he did back there at the Boulangerie while not to mention, make eye contact with you- sweet revenge had to be one of the best tastes a connoisseur could ever call upon.

And the project? Oh yeah, that’s right. It was a good thing that it was the final day so you wouldn’t have to act civil with him, for better or for worse.

After a few more blocks finally, you made it home, causing you to sigh out in relief. Hurriedly you grabbed your keys from your purse, fumbling with several of them to find the one that fit perfectly. The familiar touch never came though, and you groaned loudly, cursing yourself in your head for forgetting it in the library. It was when you set it down next to the book you were reading before you confronted the librarian- poor old woman- and somehow, you forgot to pick it up the second you got up.

Great, now this.

You opted to stare at the horizon in front of you, letting the breeze freely cool down your body. The sight was nothing less than pretty. It was a windy, golden sunny day outside but you didn’t want anything to do with it. All day you were planning to mope around the house and watch your favorite shows, procrastinating ‘til the last minute until the due date of every assignment arrived. They hit differently whenever you grabbed a bag of chips downstairs to finish them along with the homework, and you giggled at every moment that flashed in your head.

There was nothing else better to do but call Soobin, right? Although you didn’t want to bother him because these months have definitely been annoying for him whether he said it or not.

Defeated, you then stared down into the white porch as if it was at fault, feeling fear rise up your throat. What were you going to do? There was no one else you had given the key to, except...

“Y/N? Can we talk?”

Oh, no. Oh, no... Oh no no no!

When you heard that voice you were instantly glued to that spot, feet affixed on the porch as your heart beat too fast for its own good. Your mind must’ve been hallucinating and playing tricks on you; clearly you weren’t ready to see him yet!

Swiftly you moved your head to the side, eyes widening with appall to see that he was actually right there. Expression nothing less than sorrow, hair messed up and fluffy right in front of his eyes, cherry blossom lips curved into a trembling frown: it was Yeonjun, alright, but yet it was someone you couldn’t recognize due to the complete change of attitude in him. He was tightly holding onto your books but seemingly refusing to hand them over as if that would do anything better and increase the need for conversation. Unlike his stiff posture, his eyes held firm intent though, and you quivered at the determination sewn in them.

“Do you need anything?”

Instead of acting childish like you played out in your head, you simply responded it a curt voice because it was better than saying nothing and benefiting the sworn silence. More than anything you wanted to get out of there and leave the awkward tension, but there was nothing else you could possibly do without embarrassing yourself due to the fact you lost your keys.

“I... I...” This time, he avoided your eyes, words caught in his throat as he couldn’t find the exact thing to say. It wouldn’t make things any better, you realized. It just wasn’t meant to be.

You pursed your lips, locking them into a line. Whatever he had to say- it didn’t matter. Plus, there was another thing. As your eyes were already tearing up, it would be hard to stay for long to listen to his words. There was no telling what you’d say if tears automatically streamed down your cheeks.

“If you don’t have anything to say, then I’ll l-leave. We can just work on the project separa-”

Clack!

Clack!

Clack!

Before you could even stay true to your words, Yeonjun took slow steps towards you that had you walking backwards... without you looking.

Soon enough your back hit the door, and you gasped at the close proximity between the two of you now as he leaned in. His hands reached out to cage you in between his arms, tilting his head to the side to study your reaction. The soft blue hair brushed against the top of your head- showing how dangerously close he was. His breath fanned across your lips and his heavenly cologne infiltrated your sense of smell. If he decided to torture you even more, then you’d be able to touch noses from how near he was.

Look, you weren’t sure how to describe it at that moment other than- he was pinning you to the damn wall?! Suddenly you felt all the blood rush in your face, and it was then that you couldn’t make eye contact with him anymore- especially because he’d see how embarrassed you were! He didn’t have to be that close!

“yes, I need something. Or more specifically, you.”

His voice was much more huskier than you remembered it to be, and his eyes fell upon yours, begging for you to look back if not for your anxiety that he was this close. You immediately shut your eyes, heart beating erratically in your chest even if you tried to stop it by focusing on something else. But Yeonjun... how could you not think of anything else but him?! He was nothing short of breathtaking but seeing him this close and personal... it didn’t do good things for your heart!

“M-me?”

It was obvious that the boy was amused even if he felt guilty about the problem, making a quick exhale through his nose to show entertainment. His chuckle that came heartily through his chest caused your ears to heat up with shame since it showed how weak you were- just for him.

“Yes you, you silly baby,” he cooed endearingly, “who else could it be?”

“You’re one to be calling me silly! Don’t pretend like you were the one the other day who asked if frogs have blood!”

In a split second, his face morphed into something nothing less than serious and his left arm dropped to his side. You couldn’t help but wonder at the duality he managed to have when the gravity of the situation hit him.

“I miss things like this. I miss it so much. I miss joking around with you and chasing you around the house just to tickle you. I miss how attached you were because little did you know, I was just as much attached to you as you were to me.

“I miss the sweet look you give me every time I ask you out on a date. I miss having you right beside me whenever we studied together because you were the only person who cheered me on even when it was two in the morning. I miss giving you random kisses out of nowhere because I can’t get enough of you and that adorable, surprised face whenever I did so.

“I miss slipping my hand into yours whenever we would walk home together, letting you cling onto me so that I could protect you from all dangers. I miss giving you victory every argument we had because I hate making you cry. I miss cuddling you on the couch as we watched our favorite shows together whenever we were too lazy to get up and how I couldn’t stop smiling every time you laughed.

“I miss kissing the top of your forehead and you never knew because you were asleep. I miss waking up with you by my side and seeing something so gorgeous it would stay in my head all day even if I studied the same materials over and over again. I miss looking up at the stars with you at Moonlight and resting my head on your lap as you ran your fingers through my hair and how we’d do it every single week.

“Can’t you see? I miss you and every little thing you do, simple or exquisite. I know why you acted that way yesterday and I hate myself so much for not realizing it until later. I owed her something after she told me a way to somehow get closer to you when I’d done such a horrible thing. You can love Soobin- I don’t care about myself anymore as long I get to see my favorite girl smile due to the fact that she’s in love.

“Y/N, you mean much more to me than anything and it’s okay if you’re happy not loving me again because at least I got to experience the full joy and sadness that visited along with the love of my life. This may be the last time you may ever want to see me, but please... let me tell you how much I need you one last time.”

His eyes were shining, full of sincerity that you were able to feel even if you weren’t him. Tears resembling glistening pearls streamed down with his cheeks as he finally told you the truth he’d been dying to tell you, allowing you to see his vulnerabilities inside out. And yet, he was genuinely smiling as he confessed this, happy enough he got the chance to tell you loved you one last time.

Gradually he extended his arms out wide, allowing you to have your personal space while he took a few steps backwards and towards the grass where you followed him. By the end of it all, you weren’t able to help the tears welling up in your eyes at how touched you were from the inside. It was him, the boy who promised to love you until the end of time.

“Y-Yeonjun, I...” he cut in through your words, closing his eyes in fear of the pain that would soon become of his body if you did in the end, choose to grant his wish. It simply wasn’t enough to level the agony of his heart, but he was willing to take all the pain instead of burdening it on you.

“I’ll let you push me. I’ll let you hit me. I’ll let you get back what you deserve. You can slap me, as long as you let everything out. I don’t want you to hurt anymore because of me, so just do it!”

...

...

...

Silence.

Oh, the euphoric relief coursing in your veins that really pushed you over the edge.

Immediately you threw yourself at him, wrapping your arms around him as tightly as you could because you never wanted to let go. You melted into his embrace upon contact, burying your head against his chest that was warm and overflowing with passion. Yeonjun hesitantly embraced you back, unsure of what happened just now.

You couldn’t help but giggle at his dumbfound expression.

“You silly baby,” you teased, repeating his playful words from earlier, “I’m not dating Soobin and I never have. Why would I date him when I’ll never love this way again?”

You booped his nose as quickly as you could, smiling when he finally reciprocated the same grin back.

“Choi Yeonjun, you were such a fool to lose me, but I’m even more of a fool to love you again. I’ve never stopped loving you, although I’m sure you already knew that, hEY-”

With happiness overflowing the boy, he picked you up and you were swept off your feet in a second. Wide smiles reflected back and forth from his face to yours as he spun you around him a few inches from the ground, pure bliss surrounding the two of you since you both were complete again. He let you laugh in his hands, tickling your sides unintentionally while you snickered at him to let you down. He only chuckled at this, stopping in place but still refusing to listen to your request.

“I love your very big brain that’s so smart it makes me frustrated with how dumb I am sometimes,” he brought you down a little bit to kiss your forehead. He then trailed down to your nose.

“I love how you ask me for opinions of perfume when you know deep down instead I adore your natural scent instead,” he kissed your nose and you laughed at the feeling it naturally gave you.

“But most importantly,” Yeonjun placed you down on the golden grasslands again and ceased right in front of your lips, letting his breath fall upon them, “I love you.”

Then he connected your lips together, bringing you closer towards him than he had ever done before.

At last, everything was finally perfect.

«──── « ⋅ʚ♡ɞ⋅ » ────»

Posted: 3/29/21- 1:37am (yes i did stay up halfway to two am just to get this finished. priorities people- it’s just a sweet early monday here 😔🧍)

Tags:

[rosaline-black]

Hiii there! Hope everything’s good with you and congratulations on the follow count!! I’m happy for you, not surprised tho, cause your writing is 😗🤌 amazing!

Ok, so I’m a girl, she/her and straight and I’d like to request a 🌼 with a guy from the marauders.

I’m an introvert, hard shell to break, I isolate myself a lot, mainly in new friendships, which gives me the smart-quiet-goody-2-shoes stereotype. Socialisation haunts me and I’m shit awkward at interactions. When the shell is broken, I get very talkative. My mind is chaotic 24/7 so I shuffle between topics very fast and I stutter a little and get tangled in my own sentences, mainly when I’m excited. Im blunt and VERY sarcastic and ironic and like to dramatize stuff to make fun of it. Im very kind and put others above me sometimes, which beats my very high empathy and sensibility to pieces but oh well. I can also get very fired up in arguments cause I’m very passionate about my beliefs and values but I won’t cross the line and offend anyone as no matter how stubborn I am (extremely btw) I always try to make amends after cooling down and mediate when I’m not involved. I’m a romantic and a daydreamer. I’m smart and I like to learn stuff and to know how things work and understand them but am an extreme overthinker. I think far too much about every little thing and get insecure. Parties make me really anxious and loud people annoy me so I’d rather stay in. Sometimes I think I’m a little too mature. Like, can we talk about politics and the economic state of the world?? (Pls forgive me, i had to). Im curious but scattered so I’ll easily start a night-in (sponsored by YouTube!) by watching a video on “the most memorable Eurovision entries of all time” and end it with “inside the mind of a psychopath: a deep psychological analysis”. ✨It’s a little bit of everything all of the time✨ which reminds me of how much I love Bo Burnham. In a lot of my free time i listen to his songs or whatch his shows. I love how he’s genially funny but also #deep (I’m sorry) and brutally honest and makes you think. It’s also a good clutch for my anxiety. I consume books at a crazy speed but always love going back to some classics. I love sitcoms and rock music. Sometimes I like to spend time doing online timed questionaries about general knowledge cause I like challenging myself (and I also don’t have a life). Oh, this is very important: my pet peeve is loud chewing and gulping. Please do not eat and drink loudly yall, I beg of you. I’m very observant and have a ridiculously selective memory, I won’t remember my lunch from yesterday but I’ll remember the first words someone spoke to me 10 years ago. Im a firm believer in empathy and doing what’s right and on a completely connected note, I’m a big cuddler. I cant ever tell something funny as I’ll just laugh my ass off and I also have a very long list of musical and cinematic and ¿memematical? references that I sometimes insert all over (initially) nice conversations :) Yeah. Important information right there.

That’s it ig. Can’t think of much more rn. Sorry if I didn’t choose the most helpful information!!

Okay first of all are we the same person? Like fr I’m convinced we are omg. Please dm or something cause I screamed at the jaden smith reference.

Right so I found this one kinda easy but I match you with…

Remus Lupin

- first of all let’s say this is modern day, Remus would be such a big bo burnham stan like come on

- you both would spend long ass days reading together, imagine you resting your head on his lap reading your respective books. Omg maybe you even have book clubs with just you two (and maybe lily too)

- I think your bluntness would coincide with Remus perfectly. Sometimes this man just needs to hear the honest truth, and he loves you for it.

- you’re both a little awkward, but with Remus having friends that are so outgoing, you benefit just like he did when he met the other marauders. They help with your socialisation problems, weeding you into the idea of a party (which I tbh just headcanon is just you all getting drunk and James turning into a deer for bants)

- imagine you and Remus being the parents of the group; you hear Sirius chewing too loud and talking with his mouth full so you both simultaneously throw pillows at his head

- Remus is also used to putting people above his own needs so he recognises quickly that you’re doing the same. He’s there to be like… no no no, eat this damn chocolate and relax right now!!!

- also one final note; cuddling Remus post full moon>>>>

[flannels-and-fannypacks]

Will They Won’t They | Part 4/4 [Reggie Peters]

Pairings: Reggie Peters x fem!Reader

Words: 6.0K

WARNINGS: swears, ANGST

A/N: oh my god it’s finally here. the last part. our baby. i literally can’t believe it i’m almost in tears. thank you so mcuh for being with us this past week and sharing the joy drea and i have had writing this for you guys. please i’m literally begging you guys to SEND IN MEMES you’ve made related to this series they make our day. anyways lots of love babes - mimi

A/N: GUYS IT’S THE LAST ONE IM SO EXCITED SEND MEMES PLEASE - drea

                          ◤━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━◥

“(Y/N) excited for a school function that doesn’t require academics?” Rose questioned.

“Someone called the police there’s been a kidnapping!” Alex exclaimed.

“Oh so now you want the police involved,” you crossed your arms and rolled your eyes.

“How are you still not over that!” Luke exclaimed. “I took you in and fed you, and bought you clothes and loved you,” he said exaggeratedly and you just pushed away his pouting face from yours.

“And how am I not allowed to want to go to a school dance? I like having fun every once in a while. The last time I checked that wasn’t a crime,”

“Yeah it’s not a crime if you’re anyone but (Y/N) (L/N),” Bobby nudged you and you sighed loudly. “Hey where’s Reggie by the way? I thought he was going to come,”

“I think he is,” Alex nodded. “He said something about maybe having to walk, his parents are busy,”

You bit the inside of your cheek hoping the Peters could hold off fighting for one night, Reggie deserved a break. They might not have realized it, but he secretly blamed himself for it all even though it could be nothing further from the fact. You knew that well enough.

“Hey I’m here,” Reggie said, jogging up to the group that was waiting for him so they could head inside the school. “Sorry I’m late,” he apologized. “I got a little distracted when leaving.” You could tell he was lying but didn’t speak up about it.

Luke shook his head, patting Reggie’s back with the hand that wasn’t holding his guitar case. “It’s all good,” he said with a grin. “What matters is that we’re all here, and ready to rock these nerds!”

Rose made a sour face. “We’re still here,” she pointed out, gesturing to the two of you.

“Right,” Bobby nodded, elbowing Luke in the ribs. “Let’s rock these nerds except for our fashionista Rose and (N/N)!”

You beamed. “Thank you!”

“The ultra nerd!”

“Fuck you!” you shot back.

Reggie pulled you into a side hug. “Leave Cookie alone,” he told them. “The only one who gets to tease her is me.”

You rolled your eyes as Luke grabbed you by your wrist. “Hands off my daughter,” he warned. “And for the record, no one teases my child? Say one word and I’ll fight you myself.”

“If someone pulls me like a rag doll one more time it’ll be your sorry asses that get beat,” you threatened.

Luke beamed at you, pinching your cheek. “Oh, she learned how to threaten people!” he gushed. “Like mother, like daughter.”

You pushed them all towards the stage. “Alright, you dorks,” you grumbled. “Get on stage. Make me a happy bunny, or whatever.”

The boys saluted before marching off. “Got it, Lady Bunny!” they cheered as they made it backstage.

You glanced over at Rose who had her arms crossed on her chest as she shook her head. “Those boys,” she sighed. “I can never understand how we put up with them.”

Shrugging your shoulders, you took Rose’s hand in yours. “You gotta admit, they’re growing on us,” you joked. “Now come on, let’s get to the dance floor!”

You and Rose watched as the boys finally got on stage, their instruments ready in their hands. Luke took the microphone and smiled widely at the crowd.

“What’s up, Los Feliz High?” he said into the microphone. A roar of cheers followed, making Luke laugh. “We’re Sunset Curve, and this is one of our original songs. It’s called Now or Never.”

The entire school adored Sunset Curve and their music. By the time they were finished, they were cheering for more. It made you happy to know that those boys were bound to go far with their music.

You and Rose met the boys backstage where they were putting away their things and getting ready to come and join you out and dance.

“Guys that was amazing!” you exclaimed with a grin. “You all played so well,”

“I’m so proud of my little renters,” Rose joked and the guys all laughed, tossing their things aside before dragging you and Rose to the dance floor.

Now that the DJ had taken over, the guys were able to finally dance with you guys. In a circle, the group and you sang along to the music, occasionally jumping up and down and screaming the lyrics.

In the corner of your eye, you saw Rose continuously glancing back at a boy in the back of the gym. Following her gaze, you lit up at who you saw. You pulled Rose down to your level, whispering in her ear,

“Ray Molina, an absolute sweetheart and my coworker at the cafe. Loves photography and apparently you. Now go!”

Rose blushed, shaking her head repeatedly. “No, I can't,” she stammered.

Rolling your eyes, you grabbed her shoulders and pushed her towards your friend. “Ray!” you greeted excitedly. “This is Rose! She loves espressos and photography.”

The shy boy put his hand out for Rose to shake. “Hi,” he whispered nervously. “I like your jacket. The flower is...gorgeous. What is it?”

Rose grinned. “A dahlia,” she replied, finally going back to her normal, extroverted self.

You sent Ray a big thumbs up from behind along with an exaggerated wink before heading back to the boys.

You saw Alex awkwardly shuffling his feet while Luke, Reggie, and Bobby were dancing and making complete fools of themselves, but that was kind of the point wasn’t it.

So you made your way to him, grabbing his hands and pulling him more into the dance floor with you.

“Come on Alex you gotta let loose!” you insisted while attempting to twirl him around.

“Um who are you and what did you do with the real (Y/N)?” he joked and you rolled your eyes.

“Already been over this Mercer! Seriously though, I know you get anxious and nervous, I do too and you know what helps me?” you whispered. “Singing,”

“Actually?”

“Yeah! It calms me down,” you admitted. “So come on, you know the song! Belt it with me!”

Alex scrunched his nose and you frowned and started to sing, proving to him just how much it could help.

Slowly he got more comfortable until it felt like it was just the two of you dancing around like friends did and singing Whitney Huston’s greatest hit.

“Oh, I wanna dance with somebody! I wanna feel the heat with somebody! Yeah, I wanna dance with somebody! With somebody who loves me!”

Alex, finally out of his shell, danced along energetically to the music with your hands intertwined. Occasionally he would pull you close and spin you like no one was around. You had to admit, the boy had a talent for dancing. He would definitely make Mrs. Leona proud.

Reggie watched you and Alex dance and fool around, laughing with your heads tilted back. Reggie couldn’t help but smile as you belted the lyrics with Alex joining in. He was shocked, to say the least, to see Alex so carefree. You really did bring out the best in people. He would know, you brought out the best in him.

Reggie barely noticed Bobby walk over to him, his eyes following Reggie’s to the dancing friends. The boy smirked, shaking his head. “You got it bad, don’t you?”

Reggie couldn’t help but nod. “Yeah, I do,” was all he could say.

“You gonna do anything about it?” Luke joined in and Reggie shrugged.

“I don’t know. Sometimes I wonder if maybe if I say something or do something, that look she has, how happy she is, it’s gonna change and I don’t want that to happen,” he admitted.

“I know it’s a weird thing to ask, but what do you like most about her?” Bobby asked.

Reggie had a stupid smile on his face, shaking his head and covering his mouth with his hand,

“Everything,” he shrugged his shoulders. “Absolutely everything,”

You and Alex had since then finished dancing to the song and ran up to the other three boys who were chatting. You were out of breath with a huge grin on your face when you looked at Reggie who couldn’t stop thinking about how adorable you looked with your flushed cheeks.

“Everything alright Flicka?” you asked.

“Everything’s perfect, Cookie,” he nodded.

And perfect it was.

—

You sighed as Rose brushed through your hair for probably the millionth time that hour.

“Can you guys at least explain what you’re doing to me?” you whined. “I feel like I’ve been sitting here for ages and have like...a hundred layers of makeup on my face.”

Alex glanced up from the random magazine he found on Rose’s bedroom floor. “Nope,” he responded, sprawled lazily on Rose’s bed. “You’re going to find out soon enough.”

You grumbled to yourself. “If you make me look like a clown, Rose-”

Rose laughed, taking a lipstick tube and swiping it against your bottom lip. “You’re fine,” she reassured you. “Besides, this is my work we’re talking about. I have skills, and I’m going to flaunt them.” You giggled, finally relaxing as the girl continued to fix your hair and makeup.

Nearly another hour passed when Alex glanced at the clock. “Shoot, we have to be at the arcade in twenty minutes.”

You rolled your eyes. “And with your grandpa driving, we’re not going to get there until the next decade.”

Alex rolled off the bed, waving his keys in front of your face. “Who’s the one with the driver’s license again?” he asked.

You stuck your tongue out at him. “Fuck you, my driver’s instructor totally had it out for me. And you don’t even have a real van, it's a minivan.”

Alex flipped you off. “Haha, now let’s get going.”

“One second,” Rose said. The girl reached into your jewelry box, pulling out your horseshoe necklace. Before you could protest, she clasped it around your neck. With an approving smile, Rose pulled you up to your feet. “Come on, Cinderella,” she teased. “You’re ready for the ball.”

“Let’s stop by the studio first,” you said, straightening out your white shirt. “I left my bag in there.”

You and Rose made your way to the studio, parting so that you can grab your bag that was sitting on the coffee table. Rose followed close behind, picking up the lone red flannel on the couch. Walking behind you, Rose quickly tied the flannel around your waist.

“Rose, what’s this for?” you asked, eyeing the flannel.

She waved your question off casually. “It completes the look,” she explained. “Now, let’s get to the van before Alex leaves us!”

You hopped in the van with Rose as Alex drove off to the arcade, much faster than necessary to prove he wasn’t a slow driver, not that you thought this was how he was going to retaliate that comment.

By the time you reached there Luke, Bobby, and Reggie were all waiting by the claw machine.

“What took you guys so long?” Bobby asked and you pointed at both Alex and Rose in blame.

“Wow, I think I just saw the bus that you decided to throw us under,” Rose shook her head, turning it just the right direction to see a certain amateur photographer sitting at one of the tables with a few friends. Immediately, her face turned into a million shades of red.

“Oh is that Ray?” Luke asked, quickly joining in on the conversation.

“Um, can we maybe address that later?” Reggie asked. “Cause I’m pretty sure that’s my flannel,” he pointed to the fabric tied around your waist.

“Oh my God is it? Is it? I knew it looked familiar,” you said while trying to untie it from your waist but Reggie put a hand on yours, stopping you from doing so.

“It’s fine Cookie,” he shrugged. “Keep it, I have a few. It looks good on you,”

You blushed and nodded, tightening the flannel again around your waist.

“Okay, so what’s the first thing you guys normally do?” you asked, knowing them they probably did some sort of voodoo ritual before playing games, they were weird like that. “Oh and Rose you should call Ray over to join us cause if you don’t I will,” you said in a sing-song voice. Rose’s face turned red as she repeatedly shook her head.

Luke called out to the group to get everyone’s attention. “Game plan, kids,” he said.

You rolled your eyes. “Of course there’s a game plan,” you groaned.

The guitarist shot you a look before continuing. “Anyway,” he said. “First we start with the basketball shooting game, then we work down the aisle, all the way down to the claw machines. Don’t spend any longer than five minutes on each claw machine game. We all know those games are bullshit. If you have any coins left, use them on the game you’re best at.”

You made a sour face. “Yet you guys call me the nerd of the group,” you scoffed, crossing your arms on your chest.

“Hey, don’t disrespect the arcade kings,” Bobby shot back. “We practically own this arcade.”

“Sure, whatever helps you sleep at night.”

“(Y/N) why don’t you come with me and play some basketball,” Alex suggested.

“You’re just saying that cause you know my hand-eye coordination sucks and you wanna see me fail,” you said sticking your tongue out at him.

“Yeah and I’m not even gonna deny it, come on,” Alex said, dragging you over to where the game was and placing some tokens in the machine.

“Alex,” you whined. “I don’t wanna,”

He shot you a grin in your direction. “Let’s play, and the loser has to pay for pizza later?”

You narrowed your eyes in determination. “You’re on, Mercer.”

Time continued to fly by faster than you preferred. You and Alex had played every game nearly three times now and you were running low on coins and energy. Losing count on your wins, the two of you decided to call it a tie.

“Let’s go sit by the skeeball machines,” you suggested.

Slightly out of breath from running down the aisles to race you, Alex nodded gratefully. Hand in hand, you guided Alex through the waves of teens and children to finally find the benches in the quietest — well as quiet as an arcade can get — part of the building.

You glanced over at Alex, his cheeks flushed from playing. “You want me to go get you some water?” you asked, slightly concerned.

“If it’s not too much trouble,” he said, smiling slightly.

Standing up, you made your way to the vending machines, only to be stopped by the sound of a high pitched giggle. Hiding behind one of the game machines, you peeked to see Reggie and some blonde girl talk to each other. They were standing far too close for your liking as the girl pulled Reggie down to her level, whispering something in his ear that made him laugh.

Your face was burning. Something about the two of them together didn’t sit well with you. After a second of thinking, you decided you were upset because Reggie left you guys to go hang out with some girl. You were upset about the band not spending time together. Definitely not because Reggie was talking to another girl...smiling at her the way he does with you, and holding her waist like he did with you during your dance detention, and absolutely not because he’s joking around with her like he used to with you.

Ripping your eyes away from them, you stormed back to Alex, chucking the water bottle at him. The poor boy barely caught it, raising an eyebrow in confusion at you.

“(N/N), you okay?” he asked, setting his water bottle down to place his hand on your knee.

You nodded rigidly. “Of course I am,” you briskly answered.

“Sorry (N/N), I know fine and this clearly isn’t it,” Alex countered, still not understanding what was going on until he stood up to take a quick stretch, seeing Reggie tucked away by one of the arcade games with another girl. “Oh, I see,”

“What do you mean you see?” you asked. “There’s nothing to see,”

“Um I’d beg to differ,” Alex countered yet again. “(Y/N) if you’re upset you should just go talk to him, I’m sure Reggie will be reasonable.”

“Yeah right, reasonable is Reggie’s middle name,” you said sarcastically.

“(Y/N),” Alex said pleaded, “I swear to sweet little baby Jesus just go to him, please, put me out of my misery,”

“I guess you’re going to have to suffer,” you said stubbornly, making Alex roll his eyes and groan.

Luke and Bobby ran up to you guys. “We think it’s time we head back to the studio,” Luke told you two. “It’s nearly dark, and you know how much Alex hates driving at night.”

Alex shuddered. “Fine, let’s go,” he said before turning to you. “Don’t think we’re done with this conversation.”

The entire group filed into the car, Rose giving Ray a kiss on the cheek before joining you. Rose began to tell you about her little date, not skipping any detail. For the time you were together, you started to forget why you were mad.

But then Reggie entered the van. “Hey guys!” he greeted energetically, finding his spot in the back. You remained silent while everyone else said their “hellos.”

“How was everyone’s time at the arcade?” he continued to talk. Reggie glanced over at you. “Did you win against Alex? I know he’s terrible at playing games, but so are you so it’s an equal playing field.”

Normally, you would have laughed. But this time, you didn’t even look him in the eye. “It was fine,” you said stiffly.

Reggie snorted. “Just fine, come on, Cookie, I-”

“Why don’t you tell us about that girl you were talking to the entire time, then?” you cut him off, staring out the window to stop yourself from crying.

“What girl?” Rose asked, whipping her head around and narrowing her eyes.

“No one” he answered quickly.

You scoffed, crossing your arms on your chest. “So it’s okay for you to lie, but not me?” you muttered.

Reggie raised an eyebrow at your weird behaviour, but remained silent for the rest of the ride. If there was something wrong, he’d talk to you properly, and in private.

The moment Alex parked in the driveway, you quickly unbuckled your seatbelt and left the van with Rose glued to your side.

“What happened?” Rose asked in a hushed voice.

“Nothing!” you said frustratedly. “You and Alex keep on making things out of nothing. I’m telling you, there’s nothing wrong.”

As the night continued, you were still bitter towards Reggie, occasionally throwing out a sarcastic remark towards him. The group, to say the least, was very confused as to how your friendship with Reggie somehow shattered in just five hours.

“Let’s watch another movie,” Rose proposed after the first movie ended. Everyone else nodded, as Reggie piped up,

“Can we watch Star Wars?” he asked. “I’m really in the mood to-”

You groaned. “Will you just shut up,”

Reggie looked over at you stunned and just before Luke was going to say something Reggie grabbed your arm and looked at you with a serious face,

“Can I talk to you? Alone,” he said cooly.

You were about to respond with a sarcastic retort, but he stopped you by pulling you up and dragging you out of the studio into the brick open-spaced area around the rock garden.

“What the hell (Y/N),” he deadpanned.

“What do you mean what the hell?” you asked innocently and Reggie scoffed, letting go of your arm and looking away.

“Enough of the fucking bullshit (Y/N)!”

“What bullshit Reggie please enlighten me because I wasn’t the one ditching the gang to spend time with some random blonde,”

“You have no right!” Reggie angrily exclaimed, pointing roughly at you. His eyes were dark with anger, unlike anything you’ve seen before. “You have no right to say- t-to act like a child after what happened?”

You rolled your eyes. “What are you talking about?” you demanded.

Reggie laughed to himself, frustratedly running his fingers through his hair before looking back at you. “I don’t fucking understand you,” he hissed. “You’re so frustrating and unpredictable. First, you joke around with me, blush when I tell jokes or better yet flirt, but the moment I step out of line even an inch, you turn around and hate me again! I don’t get it, what the fuck do you want from me?”

“I want you!” you cried out. “Dammit, Reggie. I want you, but sometimes you’re so far up your ass you can’t even tell!”

“Me?” he yelled back. “I gave you so many chances. You wanted time? I gave you plenty of it! I have you so many opportunities that you ignored so don’t you fucking dare pin this on me.” Reggie didn’t bother letting you try and defend yourself. “You said it yourself, you wondered when people will leave you, and that you’ll be left alone again. Here’s the reality, (Y/N). People don’t leave you, you push them away. You put the blame on everyone but yourself, so all you’re left with are your own broken pieces. Face it, you’ve never changed.”

You staggered back, feeling as though you were caught under a wave of emotions. He was right. Every single word he said...was right. And damn, it hurt so much to realize it.

Reggie looked up from his shoes. “I want that necklace back,” he said in a low voice. “I don’t want to see you with it, or any piece of me, ever again. You hear me? I’m done. I’m done with your mind games. I’m tired of waiting for you. I’m done with you.”

There it was. The moment you were waiting for, the reason for Reggie to step out of your life again. Or, in reality, the reason that made Reggie realize you weren’t worth it anymore.

You quickly unclasped the necklace, throwing it on the ground along with his flannel.

Before leaving, you looked at him one more time. “It was always me, wasn’t it?” you whispered in a broken voice. “I was always the reason. The problem. The second choice. Right?” Reggie refused to look you in the eye. You wiped away your tears, a sad attempt to, really. More tears just took their place.

“I tried, Reggie,” you told him in a quiet voice. “I really did. B-but if I’m the only thing that’s holding you back, then let me go.”

Reggie remained silent. Taking it as your cue to leave, you ran down the street, not bothering to say goodbye to your friends.

And just like that, you were alone again. Just like you predicted.

—

As if your week couldn’t get any worse, the universe didn’t fail you. You had detention with him. And even better, you were forced to sit in silence with him.

Seriously you thought to yourself Did he actually fall asleep while supervising detention.

Mr. Alderman, the gym teacher, was fast asleep, snoring at his desk.

You hadn’t spoken since your fight a few nights ago, the emotions still fresh under your skin, burning your eyes and throat, just making you wish for it to end.

Reggie muttered something under his breath and for the first time in a few days you took a good look at him.

His eyes were sunken and he seemed angry. It radiated off him like light bouncing off a mirror.

“Have something to say, Peters,” you whispered quietly.

“Yeah, I’m leaving,” he nodded, standing up and grabbing his bag.

“You can’t leave,” you said flatly.

“Watch me,” he turned his back and you followed him out of the class and into the hallway.

“Reggie stop,”

“No (Y/N)! I’m not stopping anymore! I’m not waiting anymore!”

“I’m not asking you to do that Reggie! It’s me, I’m leaving okay?!” you exclaimed.

“W-What?” his voice grew quiet.

“I’m transferring out at the end of the week,” you look at him with stone-cold eyes. “Not that you would care.”

“(Y/N), you...Wait you can’t-!”

“Stop telling me what I can and can't do Reggie! I hate that my fucking feelings are controlled by you! I hate that my entire life will be spent trying to find someone to live up to you! I just want some fucking peace and quiet for once in my life!” you sobbed, unable to bottle things up anymore. “I work and I work and I work and I get nothing! I try and I try and I try and I still get nothing! And maybe that’s because I can’t be in control when I’m around you so yes I’m leaving!”

Reggie didn’t say anything, he just stared at you blankly, the only sound in the empty hallways was that of your soft cries.

“I can’t do this anymore,” you choked out, turning around and running out through the back of the school and into the pouring rain, not even bothering to hide for cover under the pavilion; falling to your knees and wrapping your arms around your waist as the most devastating sounds ripped from your heart and soul.

You cried until you couldn’t cry anymore. Scream until your throat was raw. Pulled at your hair and kicked yourself, ashamed and frustrated, until the pain was too much. But even then, it could never match the pain you were feeling in your heart.

It felt good, felt right to feel this way. Ever since middle school, you had been told you were a robot, an emotionless nothing.

Look at you now. Crying like everything had up and left in your life because it did. You were alone, left behind to pick up your broken pieces. Just like Reggie said.

You hated how Reggie was right about everything. You had no right to be mad because it was true. You pushed everyone away, placed the blame on them so that you didn’t have to get hurt. Is this how he felt? Did you ever make him feel this way?

The cold air angrily nipped at your fingertips, your eyes red from the weather and your tears. Turning your head, you looked at the school door, internally hoping that maybe it would swing open. Maybe Reggie would come out of the building and take you in his arms and tell you that everything will be alright.

The door never opened. Reggie never came. You were left alone with your thoughts in the pavilion.

And the rain continued to pour on and on.

—

Reggie was distracted the entire practice. His fingers would roughly strum against his strings as he stared off into the distance, a faraway look on his face.

Luke, having noticed Reggie’s odd behaviour, stopped playing.

“Hey, Reg you wanna cool it on those strings?” Luke asked.

“Or does he need to mention how much money we have combined,” Bobby added.

“It’s negative seven hundred forty-five dollars and thirty-two cents.” Luke deadpanned and Alex rolled his eyes.

“Are you mad at Alex again?” Bobby asked and for a moment the blond drummer looked frightened.

“No, it’s not that,” Reggie shook his head.

“It’s (Y/N), isn’t it,” Rose said softly, looking at the bassist with sympathetic eyes. Just as Reggie was about to ask how she knew, Rose answered the question. “You keep looking at the spot on the couch where she used to sit during practices,”

Reggie chewed hard on the inside of his cheek while Luke came closer to him, laying a hand on his shoulder.

“You don’t need to bottle it up,” Luke whispered. “We’re here for you. You know that.”

“I messed up,” the tone of his voice was wavering as he tried to make sure it didn’t crack. “I messed up so fucking bad. The only thing I’m good at is pushing the good things in my life away until I fuck it up entirely. I’m a time bomb. It’s only going to get worse the longer people are around me,”

Reggie carefully slid his bass’ strap off his shoulder and placed his instrument against the couch where you would normally sit.

“No you’re not,” Alex told him, quickly coming to join Luke next to his friend. Bobby and Rose followed soon after and before long Reggie’s head was tucked in Luke’s shoulder as tears finally streamed from his eyes and his friends surrounded him like a shield from the cruel world.

“Aren’t I?” Reggie croaked. “I can't even talk to you guys without exploding or storming off, a-and (Y/N), she’ll never forgive me for all the things I’ve said and done… I don’t deserve any of your guys,”

“Reggie cariño, everyone deserves a family,” Rose said in a soothing voice. “And we’re each other’s family. Family sticks together no matter what, even if you don’t think they should.”

“And what about (Y/N)?” he whispered. “How could I possibly erase all that?”

“You don’t,” Luke spoke up. “You use it, use it to apologize. Use it,” he repeated, placing his songwriting pen in Reggie’s hand.

Reggie bit his lips and took the pen from Luke, seeing his tattered red book resting on the couch.

He was sure it wasn’t the first time he wrote something for you and it definitely wouldn’t be the last, but it just might have been the first one you’d hear, so it had to be perfect.

And somehow, just like you’d always managed to do, the only thing on Reggie Peters's mind was his Cookie.

—

“Rose I already said I don’t want to come here,” you sighed as your friend dragged you through the crowd of people waiting to get into the show.

“(Y/N) come on, these are your friends! They want you to be here,” she tried to convince you, but you were still skeptical, and it didn’t help that you didn’t know if you wanted to see Reggie or not right now.

Rose gave you another tug, but you dug your heels into the ground. The girl sighed, giving you a look. “It’s your last day as a Los Feliz high student,” she told you softly. You stiffened at her words, looking down at the floor. “At least spend it with us. Then, I’ll leave you be. I promise. You don’t have to see another gig -better yet, another bass- ever again. Will you do at least that for me?”

You finally glanced up from the ground. “For you,” you answered begrudgingly.

“What’s up Los Feliz High,” Luke said into the mic and was met with cheers.

“We’re Sunset Curve,” Reggie added. “And this is a little something we wrote called I Remember,”

There was a soft opening with Reggie’s bass and Alex on drums, slowly layering in the guitar riff intro before Reggie came close to his mic,

“I remember those nights, stayin’ up late, listenin’ to the radio.

I remember the days, callin’ your name, running to your patio,”

Rose glanced over at you, grinning as you tried to listen to the lyrics, finding a sense of familiarity in the words. Luke and Bobby now joined as backing vocals taking a lower and higher harmony.

“And as the years went by slowly you - left my life and I can’t, I can’t, I can’t figure out why, why?”

Alex led to the chorus with a drum fill before the hard rock beat came in, Reggie, Luke, and Bobby really getting into playing to the beat and rhythm, before all coming in again singing the chorus.

“So tell me, tell me when it all fell apart. Tell me, tell me can we go back to the start.”

The music backing instruments quieted slowly as Reggie leaned into his mic, looking directly at you. Your breath hitched at you finally made eye contact with him. You hadn’t bothered to look at him in so long, you wanted to burn the feeling into your memory so you never forget. His eyes glistened with tears as he began to sing,

“Tell me, tell me what happened to us Cookie,”

You looked over at Rose who only smiled knowingly as you tried to hide the fact that you were most definitely losing your composure, your heart beating faster and your vision becoming blurry.

“I remember I hurt you, a stain on my heart that’ll never go away. I remember I kissed you, my heart said to stay but my feet ran away.”

They transitioned back to the chorus and you couldn’t help but try to push back the lump in your throat as you looked up at your Flicka, singing for you. Reggie took the mic and walked over to you. His hand was stretched out to you, face lighting up in hope. Pushing down all your doubts, you took his hand in yours, squeezing it tight.

“And I promise, I promise, I promise I’ll never go away. And I promise I promise, I promise I’ll be there every day. Just tell me, just tell me, just tell me you’ll look the other way. Cause if I lost you one more time I don’t think that I’d survive,”

Tears streamed down your face as you listened to the lyrics, each word slowly chipping down the walls you put up around your heart. Reggie leaned in close, removing his hand from yours and placing it on the side of your face, wiping away your stray tears.

“So tell me, tell me when it all fell apart. Tell me, tell me can we go back to the start.”

The music slowed and quieted one last time, Reggie’s eyes interlocked with yours as he sang the last line,

“Tell me, tell me, will you be mine Cookie?”

Silence followed as everyone turned to you, waiting for your answer. You glanced over at Rose, who was just as impatient.

Locking eyes with Reggie, you nodded. “As long as you’ll be mine, Flicka,” you whispered so that only he could hear.

Not waiting any longer, Reggie dropped his microphone, hopping down from the stage and taking both sides of your face and pulling you into a long-awaited kiss. The crowd cheered, but your mind blocked them out.

You missed Reggie’s lips that tasted faintly of that cherry chapstick he always used. You missed feeling his hands against yours, warm and comforting.

You missed your Reggie. But now he was here, and he was never letting you go.

—

“Lady Bunny!” Luke cheered, running up to you backstage and pulling you into the tightest squeeze. “I missed you so much,” he whispered and you held him close against you.

“I missed you too, mom,” you sniffled while Luke pressed a friendly kiss to your hair before you were promptly tossed around the group, hugs and all exchanged along with the chatter of

“You’re gonna stay, right? You can’t transfer now,”

All to which the answer was yes, especially when you looked over at Reggie, the brightest smile on his face.

“Hey guys can I have a minute alone with Cookie?” he asked and they all complied, moving out of the way of the new couple.

“Have something for me Flicka?” you asked, slight teasing in your voice.

“Actually, yeah,” he nodded, fishing out a necklace from his pocket. “I shouldn’t have taken it from you. Or told you that you were the problem. You never were, I promise.”

“Water under the bridge,” you smiled shyly. “What matters is that you’re here now.” You turned around, allowing him to clip the silver chain around your neck, not without sneaking a quick peck to the corner of your lips after turning you back around.

“Perfect,” he told you, his lips quirking up into a smile. “You’re perfect.”

“And you’re overly cheesy,” you shot back jokingly.

Reggie grasped his chest in feigned hurt. “You love me, Cookie,” he pouted.

You went on the tips of your toes, kissing him softly. “Yeah, Flicka,” you whispered. “I do.”

--

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[syubub]

Yoongi birthday reading/energy check!!

It's sweet sweet tangerine bois birthday!!

I wanted to do a cute little energy check up to see what's up and ask some fun little questions!!

I'm excited so let's just do this shit!!

Disclaimer: this is for entertainment purposes and not to be taken as fact!!

---

I want to apologize for the absolute shit pictures but what's new lol

So, let's start with the platform. First thing I noticed was the blue was brighter but the platform was darker? It was like someone cranked up the contrast to 100. Ngl it looked pretty cool. Yoongis platform doesn't typically have a barrier like some of the others do so I just kinda walked in and did the whole, "happy birthday, I have questions" His energy seemed a lot more... vibrant? And playful I guess? It was really nice. Now. The actual connection was intresting because the cord was blue again and like, real thick. (I don't think my perceived thickness of the cord has and real correlation with how strong the connection is. It was just thicc) this time though, the cord was connected at the chest instead of the third eye. So i was like, ??? But my guide didn't give my any sort of helpful input (my guide likes to watch me suffer in my confusion. I'm sure of it)

Anyway, cord like that and then yoobi gave me a headbutt to connect at the third eye. Idk why he gotta be like that :( istg next time he's gonna flick my forehead or something.

I was like "cool cool cool. I want to do the reading now pls" and idk how to explain the energy other than sassy. You know? Blah blah blah I'm thinking, "I don't remember him being so cheeky but maybe I've been gone long enough for him to level up into his final sass monster form"

Anywho, this was intresting because after the little strings were connected and stuff, we plopped down on the floor. And it was like everything I was doing irl was being mimicked infront of yoons energy? So we were sitting facing eachother and I was putting the cards down between us?? Usually that doesn't happen but it was kinda fun!!

Moving right along. I first asked if there was anything he wanted to say or needed to get across and it was 11. Now, 11 has come up before and I'm still not to sure what it's in reference to? My best guess is possibly he's been seeing 11:11 or that it's 2? Idk let me know if you have any clues lol. Other stuff was just kinda banter and stuff.

So so so.

The reading. First thing I asked was how he was doing. And I shuffled his preticular way (when I ask a question I always ask for the energy to tell me how much to shuffle or when to stop. For yoongi it's always 2-2-2. So 2 bridge shuffles, 2 hand shuffles and then split the pile in 2. That's why I think 11 might be 2 to him?)

The cards we got are ace of swords rev, justice,the heirophant rev, the empress.

So based off this I was like okay. I want to pull clarity cards for the two rev cards to get a better picture so I pulled the emperor rev for ace or swords rev and strength rev and wheel of fortune rev for the heirophant rev.

Starting with the ace of swords rev, and the emperor reverse. It seems like yoongi has been re thinking his relationship to control in his life. That's he's possibly noticing any unhealthy needs to control his life and the situation around him. It could also refer to his judgment being clouded by a rigid approach.

With the justice card it makes me think that he's possibly considering a big choice in his life or that he's really doing some deconstructing of his own views. This second idea fits in well with him getting clarity on some possibly unhealthy control issues in his life.

Now. The heirophant rev, strength rev and wheel of fortune reverse. This was intresting to me bc they are all major arcana. The heirophant rev can really talk about no longer needing outside approval and making your own way in your own time bc you are your own teacher. Strength in rev I kinda read as self doubt and feeling down in this case. Like a lack of confidence in himself and his abilities. And the wheel of fortune in reverse I took to mean as his breaking cycles. All together these cards kinda paint a picture about wanting and trying to break a cycle of self doubt and self limiting beliefs and learning more about himself and why he think what he does about himself and searching through everything for truth. It's really good!! In short he's doing some nice soul searching and trusting himself to guide his own way through this self discovery!

The empress! This card seems to pop up for yoobi a lot and I think it really speaks to the abundance that surrounds him! Not just money but the abundance of creativity, love, friends ect.

Now now now. I asked him if there was anything that he wanted to tell us about himself or bts or what's happening in the near future. For that I got 2 of cups, king of wands and 3 of coins.

So the 2 of cups is partnership. Usually romantic. Could be pertaining to the may 13th thing that is ever present lol but I'll get to that later. With the 3 of coins talking about teamwork, this could definitely hint at collaborations coming up!! That's the vibe I get. No one crush my dreams. And for the king of wands it could be talking about taking the reigns on a new project and starting to get it done. Like a new opportunity. This could be a new bts project like starting a new campaign or new venture or maybe personal like the a mixtape or doing more songs for other groups ect.

I had to ask him how he was feeling about the grammys. I had to. Had to. The cards were ace of wands, 2 of wands and death reverse. When these came flying out I could help but smile. Yoongis energy was almost giddy too!

Witht he ace of wands

It's that spark of creativity and inspiration. It's that feeling when you get super excited over some new thing. I think this is the perfect example for feeling reinvigorated. The 2 of wands takes that spark from the ace and tries to funnel that excitement and newness into something directional. Using that burst of creativity to start planning for future progress!! Its so nice to see that! If they don't win (IF) you bet we're gonna get some bangers about a corrupt system. If (WHEN) they do win we'll get bangers about how thankful they are to have gotten where they are in spite of a corrupt system. I just want to hear an uncensored version of yoongi being like, "HOLY FUCKING SHIT, WE DID IT BITCHES. FUCK ALL YOU BASTARDS THAT SAID WE COULDN'T."

I can dream....

What a nice dream.

Now I asked if there was anything yoobi wanted to say to us as in advice or comfort or anything like that and I got, Clearing negativity, make time for self care, when I'm tuned into the energy of abundance I become abundant. when I'm in a state of appreciation im in vibrational alignment with my true love nature. The world rev, 2 of swords rev and that project, that person, that idea is waiting.

Awe. Take care of yourselves!! Make sure to take time to enjoy what you like and try not to let any negativity get in the way of you enjoying your days. The world rev to me seems to be talking about seeking closure on the things in your life that have been impacting you. Tie up those loose ends so you can move foward without triping over yourself and 2 of swords rev I think talks about information overload and being kinda indecisive bc of that. Take a sep back to evaluate the situation at hand because sometimes it's so close you can't see what you're looking for. Those of you who are studying and getting frustrated because you just can't seem to get it, try taking a step back and doing something to take care of yourself and come back to it so you can approach with a clearer mind. Try not to get stuck or paralyzed by choice but if you do get stuck, take some time to detach yourself from the situation and come back later!

A fair few people wanted an update on yoobis soulmate as well. If you need a refresher here's the run down. Yoongis soulmate is impossible for me to read, yoongi is a smug ass and I'm nosy and probably a little dumb.

Now that that's cleared up

I asked, "am I missing something?" (As to why I can't connect and why yoongi won't give me answers.)

I got queen of cups, magician and the high priestess. I read this as him being like, "yeah dude, you aren't woke enough"

YOONGI just give me answers pls. The high priestess is intuition and sacred knowledge, the magician is manifestation and the queen of cups is also intuition.

At this point I was like, okay you little shit, can you at least tell me how your soulmate is doing? Can you do that for me?

2 of cups, 2 of pentacles, 9 of wands and knight of wands. 2 of cups is partnership usually romantic, 2 of pentacles is priorities and managing them, 9 of wands persistence, knight of wands motivation for a new thing. His soulmate last time was in the process of going through some shit and figuring it out and it seems like now they've got a better clue of how to move foward and are currently heading towards good things/ important things in their life (possibly like working towards dream career or had an idea for a business the want to start or field they want to go in.)

I was thinking about the next question when this popped into my head, "if you know about your akashic book, do you know about your soulmates? Have you read it?" I used my pendulum. No movement at all. What so ever. "Are you listening to me?" Yes. "So answer my question please" No. "Do you like to watch me suffer?" Maybe. "Do you know the answer to the question" yes.

YOONGI WHY

This cheeky son of a bitch.

Now I was like, fuck it. Imma ask him the big boi question.

"Is your soulmate present when I do these readings?" Yes.

WHY THE FUCK CAN I NIT PICK UP ON IT???

I had to take a deep breath dude. Yoobi is testing my nerves.

"Are they hiding their energy?" No.

I was actually gonna combust. This makes no sense.

I asked yoongi if he would tell me what I'm not getting. Silence. So i ask my guide.

"lol ur dumb"

Watch me Google "how to fire your spirit guide"

Istg this feels like some dumb prank. Maybe I'm just genuinely oblivious to his soulmates energy or maybe I'm just doing something.

What do you want to bet that his soulmate is just hiding under the platform and I'm too stupid to notice or some dumb thing like that.

yoobi, sir, why must you do this?

I decided to continue.

"What message or thing have you learned from your soulmate recently that could be valuable to us?" I got healthy communication in relationships and deep replenishment.

Good to know you can have a nice communicative relationship with your soulmate bc I CAN'T.

I'm petty about it, sue me.

The message does stand though. Good communication and taking proper rest to replenish yourself.

Now I had to ask yoongi directly what he thought of may 13th.

I got the lovers, 7 of swords, the magician and judgement. The seven of swords was intresting and it makes me think there's some extra stuff at play here too. 7 of swords is about getting away with something and deceit. The clarifier was the magician.... this could mean a lot honestly. It could be that maybe yoongi will have his relationship exposed or possibly that maybe him and his soulmate meet but yoongi is disguised? Idk how that would work at all but I'm stumped. There's a lot of variations that this could be. The magician is about manifesting and having everything you need to create what you want. This could possibly mean that maybe he gets a sudden idea that's like, "oh I have to go here right now. Its super important" eventhough he has practice scheduled. So that would let down his team but he would be following his path and it might lead to him meeting his soulmate? Maybe vice versa? Idk let me know what you think??

With the judgement its about inner calling and kinda like the peak. Like shit has been leading up to this moment. With the lovers too it does seem like a union?

I asked him, "but like what's gonna happen on the 13th thought and I got the 10 of cups. Divine love, bliss, alignment, happy mushy gushy shit. This is why I'm so inclined to think that they'll meet on the 13th or things will get serious or their paths finally cross. The cards seem to heavily suggest that.

My dude. Yoongi is really sappy, pass it on.

For the last question I asked yoomgi if there was messages/ advice he had given to his soulmate that we might benefit from.

First step, open your third eye, open your heart, sign from heaven, open your arms to receiving.

A lot of opening lol.

It's good advice though learning to be open and receptive and taking that first step in tackling life or any situation.

Oki. Now for the disconnecting. It was not nearly as strange as it has been in the past. I was just like thanks dude. Again, happy birthday blah blah and I got up to leave. I noticed it looked like we were in sitting in one of those old plastic hoola hoops? Like the pink and yellow ones lol. As I was looking at and and like??? Off to the side the numbers 13, 28, 54. Obvi 54 isn't a date and then I the last yoongi check up there was book pages and I feel like 54 and 28 were the pages?? I'm not actually sure as I'm writing this so I'm gonna check.

Yep I checked. They are the page #s.

So that's intresting.

Other than that though I just kinda left and he was like, "bye" and that's all.

Not as cool as other yoongi adventures but equally as frustrating.

TLDR

Yoongis doing pretty okay and he's a cheeky little shit. My guide like to watch me suffer and yoobi is mushy gushy squishy.

Happy day of birth Syub!!

[seulgiology]

still with you ┃jeon jungkook

pairings: idol!jungkook x non-idol!reader

words: 2.6k

genre: fluff :)

synopsis: you miss jungkook while he’s away on tour, but he reminds you that he is still with you no matter what. 

warnings: cute shit ahead, angst if you squint, might make you smile.

a/n: ahhh omg admin 2 is here to save the day. june has been a really shitty month for us when it comes to giving you guys some fics and we’re sorryyy. butttt here is some jk fluff inspired by his song still with you, bc omg it is so good and i listen to it like all the time lmao. when i listened to it, i got inspired to write a little oneshot ahaha. okay this is getting long lmao, love you all <3.

disclaimer: This is a work of fiction from our imagination. It is not intended that the plot, theme, original characters, idols, etc. portray any real-life events/people. Plagiarism is NOT tolerated on this blog. If you believe we have copied an existing authors’ work, please message us privately. thank you and enjoy :)

--

The low music playing is what motivates you to get out of bed. You walk over to the vinyl player in your room to turn it off and when you do, you slump against the dresser with a tired sigh and rub your eyes. 

You can’t sleep.

That was the conclusion you came to after trying to fall asleep but failing, and here you are thirty minutes later. You had eaten dinner, took a hot shower, and even played a vinyl to help you sleep but even that rendered useless. You knew the cause of your restlessness was because your boyfriend wasn’t home and was overseas on tour still. 

It was a hard transition at first, getting used to your boyfriend being out of the country for tours. Some would think that after years of being together, you would’ve gotten used to it but they don’t understand how had it is. Since you’re already used to Jungkook being apart of your everyday life, it is hard when suddenly he’s gone for sometimes months. 

Even though at times you would fly out to wherever he was to attend a concert or see him. There are video calls whenever you two can and texting every day when he’s not busy. But, there was nothing like being in his presence. At times it was hard for you to fall asleep because he wasn’t there and you felt pathetic for needing him this much but you couldn’t help it.

You leave the room, the sound of your slippers being the only thing heard through the quiet house. You walk down the stairs and make your way to the kitchen, hoping some tea will help you relax some more. You fill the tea kettle with water before placing it on the stove and while you wait, you go back to your room to get your phone.

When unplugging it from the charger on your nightstand, you see two new messages from Jungkook from three minutes ago and you instinctively smile, unlocking your phone to see what he said. 

jk <3: hey baby, we just got done performing and im exhausted but happy.

jk <3: i know you’re probably sleeping but i love you and we will call when you wake up, sweet dreams baby.

A sad smile falls across your lips when reading the messages and you call him without thinking twice about it. You sit at the end of your bed and wait for him to answer the facetime call. He said he was exhausted and it was only five minutes ago so he shouldn’t be sleeping yet.

When he answers, your breath hitches at the beautiful sight of him. He’s smiling wide at the camera ad pushes some hair away from his eyes delicately. “Y/N, hey!” Jungkook is practically shouting and you hear the boys in the back yelling their greeting to you as well and you can’t help but smile.

“Hi,” you greet back in a small voice and Jungkook doesn’t seem to notice how off you sound. You watch as he bustles around and then finally sits down, where there isn’t as much noise being heard. “I didn’t know you were still at the stadium, do you want to call when you get back to the hotel?” You suggest and Jungkook’s eyebrows furrow a bit at the tone of your voice. It sounded a bit shaky and he just knew something was wrong.

“No, no it’s fine we’re not leaving for another twenty minutes. Plus, I’m riding with Jimin so I have to wait until he’s ready,” Jungkook assures with a wave of his hand and pushes some hair out of his face again, causing you to smile again. “I thought you were sleeping though. Why are you still up?” 

“I couldn’t sleep,” you admit sheepishly. You watch as Jungkook’s smile falls from his face and immediate worry crosses his features. “Ah, don’t worry Kook-ah, I just have trouble sleeping without you sometimes but I get over it.”

“Y/N…” Jungkook trails off sadly. Your eyes widen when you realize he started to worry anyways but before you could speak, he’s talking again. “We talked about this, yeah? Whenever you can’t sleep just call me, you know I’m not busy when you’re heading to sleep anyways. I always make time for you regardless,” he reminds you in a soft voice and the emotion that crashes into you makes you look down because your eyes started to tear up. 

“I know, I just don’t want you to worry about me. I should have been gotten used to this,” you whisper more to yourself, feeling even more upset. “I’m sorry,” You whisper, tears close to falling and emotion thick in your voice. 

“Y/N, hey, baby don’t cry,” Jungkook says in his soothing voice but you keep your head down, refusing to look at him. “I’m going to worry about you whenever I’m not by your side, that’s a given and that’s nothing you should be apologizing for. Don’t apologize for missing me, okay? Because I miss you too- so much,” Jungkook admits calmly and you can’t help but break down into tears. 

Jungkook is glad he has his headphones with him because he wouldn’t want the boys to hear you crying, it hurting him just not being there to hold you. He knew you took it hard whenever he had to leave and it made him feel bad sometimes but he knew you understood. 

“I don’t even know why I’m crying,” you say through your sobs, and Jungkook smiles sadly at you. You finally raise your face to wipe at some tears and Jungkook stays silent, waiting for you to speak. 

“I think it’s the time we been apart, you know? This is the longest we’ve been apart and it hasn’t even been two months yet,” you laugh is painful to hear because he knows it isn’t one of humor. Your chest felt like it was caving in the more you speak and as you look at Jungkook, your heart aches knowing you can’t touch him or hear him in person. “I just really miss you,” you whisper finally.

“I know and I miss you too,” Jungkook whispers back and feels himself tearing up as well, always having been a bit more open with his feelings when it came to you. “Just another week, okay? And if you’re still up when I get to the hotel, I’ll sing you to sleep.”

“Really?” you ask in a hopeful voice and Jungkook grins at your eyes brightening a bit. He nods with a hum and you smile the tiniest but it’s enough for him. 

“I love you,” he reminds you and your heart does that little skip it always does when he tells you he loves you. “I love you too, Jungkook,” you say back, the smile he gives in return enough to make you smile wider. 

You two hang up shortly after and you shuffle back down the stairs with a heavy heart. You felt a bit better but you were still missing Jungkook. You were going to have to get used to this so this wouldn’t be a problem for him for future reference.

You turn the stove off once downstairs and push the kettle to the back because you weren’t in the mood for tea anymore. When you get back upstairs, you just lay in bed and scroll through twitter, watching little moments and fancams from the concert earlier and pride swells through you at how good Jungkook is and has gotten throughout the years.

In fifteen minutes, your phone is ringing again and Jungkook is singing you to sleep. And that night you get the best sleep you’ve gotten since he has been gone.

-- 

It was two days later and you were coming home from dinner with some friends of yours. You had stopped by the store on the way home to grab some snacks because you were running low. You close the door behind you after and kick your shoes off by the door, trading them for your house slippers. 

You flip on the light and shuffle to the kitchen, turning that light on as well. It took you a few minutes to put the snacks away and after that, you got yourself a bottle of water from the fridge. As you walk upstairs, you text Jungkook letting him know you got home from dinner and you were going to watch a movie in a few.

When you get to the bedroom, you flip the light on and start to take off your clothes. You walk in you and Jungkook’s closet and turn to his side of the closet, picking out a pair of his sweats for yourself. Just as your finishing up, the doorbell is ringing.

You pull your hair out of Jungkook’s hoodie with a confused frown, wondering who could be at the door. You jog down the stairs while running a hand through your hair cause of how messy it looked after pulling on your boyfriend’s hoodie.

You open the door without thinking and who you see standing there knocks the breath out of you. You blink a few times to try to see if your vision is blurry but he is still standing there. Holding his camera bag and a suitcase by his feet, smiling shyly at you. 

“Surprise?” Jungkook says in more of a question and your mouth opens, then shuts. You can’t speak because you’re feeling so much right now. The feeling of relief and happiness is spreading through you so fast it is becoming overwhelming. You open your mouth to speak again but quickly shut it when realizing you don’t know what to say.

Instead of speaking, you do the first thing that comes to mind. You take two steps towards him and wrap your arms around his middle, gently laying your head down on his chest and closing your eyes. Jungkook smiles from above you before hugging you back, kissing your forehead softly and swaying you two gently back and forth.

The two of you stay like that for what feels like forever before Jungkook pulls away, grabbing gently at your shoulders so he can see your face. A smile finds its way onto your face as Jungkook is already smiling down at you, tucking strands of your hair behind your left ear. 

“Hi,” you finally greet and Jungkook can’t help but laugh in relief, swooping down and capturing your lips in a sweet kiss. You’re caught off guard but kiss him back anyways, squeezing your eyes shut tightly. 

It’s a short but sweet kiss and you’re the one pulling away from it this time. You smack your lips together and smooth your hands up his chest, wrapping your arms around his neck. Jungkook is looking down at you so sweetly, your heart is starting to hurt. 

“Let’s get inside,” you suggest, and Jungkook nods, gathering his stuff and walking into the house after you. “Have you eaten?” you ask after locking the door, while Jungkook takes his shoes off. 

“No, I’m more tired than hungry,” Jungkook tells you while ruffling his fluffy hair. It makes you smile just knowing he is here with you again and a few days before he was supposed to be home anyways. Jungkook looks at you when noticing your silence and raises an eyebrow. This is when he really takes the time to realize what you’re wearing. “Are those my sweats?” he asks, amusement laced in his tone and you quickly heat up, arms wrapping around yourself.

“No!” you’re quick to say but Jungkook is already hugging you again, muttering about how cute you are. You shove him away slightly, grumbling under your breath and pulling the hood over your head. Jungkook kisses your forehead before grabbing his things and shuffling up the stairs.

“Come back down when you’re done!” you shout up after him and he makes a noise of agreement back. You walk to the kitchen and take out a bottle of water, sitting at the island and going to take your phone out of your pocket when realizing you left it upstairs. You stand up and make a move to go get it until your eyes catch sight of your backyard.

You walk towards the sliding doors and slide it open, stepping out into the clear night. There was a gentle breeze passing through the warm summer air and you pocket your hands in the pockets of the sweatpants that are way too big on you.

It was the stars that caught your attention from inside the kitchen. The way they were sparkling and glistening so brightly in the sky made you smile, and admire them. You weren’t sure how long you were standing there but when you felt a pair of arms wrap around your waist from behind you, you blinked out of your trance. 

“What are you doing out here?” Jungkook whispers against your neck, pressing a light kiss there which sends shivers down your spine. 

“The stars are beautiful,” you respond in a soft voice, and Jungkook hums. His chin rests on your shoulder and your hands lay over his. It’s a beautiful night and the breeze knocks Jungkook’s heavenly smell into you. Leaning back into his chest, Jungkook kisses both of your cheeks.

He then grabs at your waist gently and turns you around in his hold so he can see your face. You notice his change of clothes and any makeup that was left on his face is now off. Jungkook sways the two of you again but you take it upon yourself to start moving. 

The two of you dance around your backyard with happy smiles on your faces and at one point Jungkook starts to sing. It’s soft and low but it’s enough, it’s enough for your eyes to tear up and for you to lean up and kiss him hard. The dancing slows but doesn’t stop as the kiss picks up, passionate, and filled with so many unspoken promises. You grip at his shoulders and he squeezes your hips, pulling you closer to him. 

When the rain starts to pour, neither of you move. You hold onto each other tightly and Jungkook moves his head back, breaking the kiss. It’s a happy laugh that sounds through the air and your tears spill over when noticing he’s crying, even though the rain. 

“I missed you,” Jungkook admits, his voice shaky and your heart fills. “And I love you, so much Y/N, I will never leave you, okay? It’s always me and you, forever. I’m still with you.”

His words echo in your head beautifully. His teary eyes look at you which such fondness and with so much love, you know he is being honest with you. You’re not sure where this is coming from but you don’t hesitate to kiss him again, but this time slower. You two move together perfectly and your trembling lips make you pull apart. 

“I love you, Jungkook,” you say to him and Jungkook bites his trembling lip to keep from crying. The rain is starting to pour harder but neither of you care. “Always,” you assure with a small smile. The volume of your voice was a bit loud due to the heaviness of the rain but Jungkook heard you loud and clear. 

After the heartfelt moment outside, you two scurry back inside and rid of your clothes immediately, dropping it at the laundry room and as you’re drying your hair, Jungkook speaks.

“You know we just kissed in the rain right?”

“And there goes the moment.”