#sometimes it isn't a bad idea to stop and look which side of it we are on

[a-s-levynn]

.

[aroaceleovaldez]

Wait, did Rick actually say that demigods can't have PTSD?

Because of what? Their godly side? Their ADHD?

There are so many people with ADHD who have PTSD. How much research did he do?

Rick implied at some point more recently (sometime during HoO or soon after, while discussing Percabeth post-Tartarus) that demigods either don't get PTSD (specifically that Percabeth and/or Nico wouldn't have PTSD from Tartarus - which was later retconned) or it's much more difficult for them to get PTSD. While he didn't entirely say that demigods fully can't get PTSD, moreso that Percy and Annabeth just didn't get PTSD specifically from Tartarus, most people took it as "demigods can't get PTSD at all for demigod reasons."

In actuality, this already conflicts with The Lightning Thief, because Percy literally starts the series with PTSD or cPTSD from Gabe. It's not even a subtle or small detail - it's a major detail that totally informs how Percy navigates the world, particularly his dynamic with a lot of authority figures; Mr. D in particular explicitly, entirely because Percy says that he reminds him of Gabe. It takes literally the entire first series for Percy to be able to move past his PTSD response to actually form a friendship with Mr. D, and even into SoN we get references to Percy's PTSD from Gabe.

And like you said - a ton of folks with ADHD (and autism and all across the neurodivergent spectrum) commonly have PTSD. cPTSD particularly relating to schooling systems is EXTREMELY common. Like, almost guaranteed common at least in America. There is actual research about how the current American school system is set up is inherently traumatizing to neurodivergent students.

I have no idea why Rick temporarily decided to try and claim that demigods didn't get PTSD? It is true that PTSD is kind of random - you can absolutely go through an extremely traumatizing event and not develop PTSD, and/or go through a "less" traumatizing event and get PTSD from that but not the other - so claiming just that Percy and Annabeth didn't get PTSD specifically from Tartarus for ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ reasons isn't unfair to say. But saying that they just can't full-stop, especially when the series already confirmed that's not true, is extremely bizarre. It kind of reminds me of how in Un Natale Mezzosangue, Rick says that demigods can't get covid for some reason? Even though demigods can get sick from other general illnesses? He just randomly decided covid was a "mortals-only illness" which has very bad undertones. Meanwhile in TOA and TSATS immortals can get hayfever. Go figure.

There is also an aspect, particularly relating to the retcons about this, with how the fandom interacts with it. The question asked to Rick to begin with implied that Percy did not already have PTSD in any form, or that Nico wasn't exhibiting PTSD from Tartarus at all. Neither of those things were true - Nico does appear to have some amount of trauma response from Tartarus in HoO and Percy VERY explicitly has PTSD in the first series and further references to it in SoN. But neither get acknowledged by readers much if at all because it doesn't look like stereotypical PTSD - it looks like real PTSD. It also never gets called PTSD by name (because it doesn't make sense to do that! You don't do that in writing most of the time). Their PTSD (and Annabeth's) only gets acknowledged by readers when it uses explicit exact terminology (like Nico in TOA) or stereotypical depictions (TSATS). Which is really a shame! Because Percy's first series PTSD is honestly a really fantastic depiction of PTSD in my opinion! It's subtle and consistent and it highlights a lot of aspects of PTSD that get overlooked beyond "actively having a full-blown panic attack" or the stereotypical "waking up screaming and crying." Particularly for a neurodiverse audience that's more likely to have cPTSD themselves, Percy having those subtler symptoms being highlighted is way more relatable because that's more likely to be the most common symptoms for those readers! And i do very much wish that was touched upon more!

[aliceramblez]

BroZone Brothers With An Insecure S/O 😔💗

Tags: GN! Reader, Self-Deprecating Jokes, Low Self-Esteem, Abandonment Issues, Slight Body Insecurities. Fluff/Comfort.

A/N: Here we go with our first request! I really liked this idea as someone who has low self-esteem, and honestly it goes to all of y'all who think you're not good enough— cause you are! Also sorry it took a bit! I've been sick because the universe hates me 🙃

Feel free to leave a request & hope you enjoy! ^^

John Dory

At first, he doesn't really know what to make of it.

He finds it a bit strange, but doesn't question your odd sense of humor, and will sometimes even join in on the joke by saying stuff about himself, thinking it's some sort of inside thing between the two of you.

“Man, I can't believe I'm so clingy, sorry! Feel free to use me as a bad example, at least that way I won't be totally useless, haha!”

“Ha! You think that's bad? Babe, you haven't even seen me when I'm up at night just staring at the ceiling contemplating my life choices.”

It isn't until getting a good smack from Bruce and Floyd that he realizes you're actually being serious. And the prospect of that kinda puzzles him, not gonna lie.

“Look at you, tiger! Got yourself plenty of groupies already— Not surprising honestly. Don't have to worry about backups when you decide you're ready to move on, either!”

After a performance at the Pop Troll village, everyone is gushing over BroZone because of course they are. JD only barely manages to squeeze past the number of fans to get to you on the other side of the podium.

The oldest sibling looks at you in shock, and has to get closer to make sure he heard you right. “Babe, why would you say that?”

Caught off guard, you manage a nervous chuckle as you play with your hair. “I-I mean... Wow, would you look at the time! We gotta meet with Poppy and the others!”

John Dory stops you on your tracks and demands an explanation, which isn't really good for your poor heart. All you can do is kick the dirt and avoid his gaze, since that makes what you're about to say much easier to voice aloud.

“I mean... You're John Dory. You could date any troll you wanted and yet you're sticking with me. It honestly feels like a dream sometimes... And I'm scared of the day you realize you can do WAY better and decide to leave me.”

After processing this, he immediately holds your face in his hands and gives you the most serious expression you've ever seen on him. “I don't want just any random troll... I want you. You're my number one fan, and I'm yours, so don't even think about stuff like that, okay?”

After the exchange, he's always on the lookout for whenever your bad habit wants to kick in again and is ready to stop it ASAP

Spruce/Bruce

He notices it happens mostly when you're working at the cantina.

Whenever you get an order wrong, trip over your own feet or don't remember how to work one of the machines properly, you'll go into an awkward insecure flight response.

You'll say “Oops! Sorry! Clumsy Twinkle Toes, coming through!” while grinning and laughing along with the customers, but Bruce knows that it's affecting you more than you lead on.

It also happens whenever BroZone is getting ready to perform and you don't know what to do with yourself since you're “standing in the way”, despite being told multiple times that it's okay for you to be backstage with everyone else.

When he talks to you about it, you get really uncomfortable and just say that it's no big deal and that you can handle it.

“I've always been a clumsy person, so I guess that's always making me doubt myself over the smallest of things... Sorry if it's annoying.”

Bruce will then proceed to give you a huge warm hug and a kiss on the forehead as he whispers comforting words into your ear.

“Hey, I can be clumsy too! I've always been the worst out of everyone when it comes to choreography. Don't tell JD though, cause I know he'll throw a fit knowing I don't practice.”

He'll throw in other examples that may seem inconsequential to you, but you appreciate the effort nonetheless and smile and giggle through the embarrassing stories he shares.

He helps you get more confident by being there with you while taking orders at the cantina and praising you whenever you get something right— albeit in private as to not embarrass you.

Same goes with rehearsals, where he WILL drag you into the lounge area to hang with his brothers and/or Poppy and Viva when they decide to visit, too.

Overall he wants what's best for you and will try and push you out of your comfort zone, but only in a safe environment where he knows that if something does go wrong, it won't be as catastrophic as you make it out to be in your head.

You never stop thanking him for being your crutch during these times.

Clay

The moment he hears the words come out of your mouth he's completely flabbergasted.

First of all, who said those things to you? Because he swears he just wants to talk to them—

It's at a sleepover with his brothers and the gals at the Bergen Golf Course, and among the many games, snacks and movies watched, pictures are also taken.

As soon as you take a look at the array of selfies, you let out what sounds like a mix between a laugh and a sigh.

“I mean, at least it stays consistent— in photos, I look ugly. And in real life, I'm also ugly!”

As soon as those words leave your lips, Clay is at your side with an almost unreadable expression, only to snatch one of the photos from your hands. “How DARE you say that about the most attractive troll I've ever met? Shame on you!”

He then starts going around the room waving the picture around to his brothers, saying stuff like “Look how attractive my S/O is! I'm dating them!” while you're just blushing profusely and begging him to stop (even though deep down your kinda giddy about it).

After that day, Clay will do small gestures in which he reminds you how beautiful he thinks you are. Everything to outright saying it each morning, joking about it with his brothers, and even bragging about you to his friends in the Bergen Golf Course.

He's a simp and he's totally okay with that because it's you.

Clay feels like he's the luckiest troll in the world for being able to snatch someone like you since he's “the most boring and uninteresting of the bunch”, so he feels like he's hit the jackpot.

You immediately tell him that he's not boring to you and that he's the best boyfriend ever, which only causes him to smirk.

“Doesn't feel good to know the person you love feels so bad about themselves, does it?”

Finally realizing his reverse psychology, you give in with a laugh. “No, it doesn't. I guess... We can both work on that? Together?”

And so you do, and end up helping each other whenever one is feeling down in the dumps, as a sort of personal cheerleader. You truly couldn't have asked for someone better.

Floyd

You're the kind of person who's very vocal about your interests.

So it's no surprise that you have to catch yourself mid-ramble whenever you're talking about something you're either interested in or knowledgeable about. And with Floyd being such a good listener, it honestly slips your mind more times than you'd prefer.

After realizing you've been talking for too long, you turn pink in the face and start apologizing profusely.

“Sorry! You probably didn't need to hear all of that. They didn't call me ‘Chatter Box’ when I was younger for nothing! Haha...”

But Floyd could care less about any of that. He loves hearing you talk, not just because he's not much of a chatty person, but because he just finds it incredibly endearing.

He'll hold your hands in his own and give you the softest smile ever that just makes you think that it should be illegal to be THIS sweet.

“You're just so cute when you get lost in the moment like that. Besides, I love seeing you happy. By all means, I'm glad you get to do the talking for the both of us, otherwise we wouldn't get anywhere in this relationship.”

You laugh at his attempt to make you feel better and melt under the touch of his lips on your cheek.

After that, whenever you go out either just the two of you or with your group of friends, Floyd will encourage you to express yourself. He does this by either asking you a question directly or subtly incorporating you into the conversation by saying something like. “I think (y/n) knows about this kinda stuff. Don't you, love?”

Obviously this all happens with your consent beforehand, since he doesn't want to put you in a tight spot, either.

Either way, he always values whatever you have to say, since you always bring in new perspectives that maybe others didn't think about before.

He will also encourage you to be yourself and not try and match your topics of conversation with things you think other people will find interesting. You deserve to be happy by sharing what you love with the world.

Poppy and Viva are huge helps in the art of feeling confident by speaking your mind, and Floyd couldn't be happier for you.

You thank him by telling him about your day each night, in which sometimes he'll fall asleep to the soothing sound of your voice, which only warms your heart on so many levels.

“Goodnight, my prince.”

“Goodnight, my little chatter box.”

Branch

Just like Clay, this man is ready to throw hands.

Just give him a name and he'll get the job done before sunrise—

He notices that sometimes you struggle with finding outfits for different occasions, either something casual, dressy, classy, etc.

But it's not because you don't have anything in your wardrobe, on the contrary it's pretty much brimming. It's more the fact that you're not satisfied with any of them because you feel like you don't look good in them.

Branch tries to convince you otherwise, saying that you look great no matter what you wear, but you can't help but feel self-conscious in anything that isn't a good old sweatshirt.

He isn't knowledgeable in fashion (clearly) so he enlists the help of Poppy and The Snack Pack to try and cater outfits to your exact measurements, along with any other nitpicks you've had in the past with either texture or material.

I mean, Branch has backup plans to his backup plans, you think he wouldn't keep notes on what kind of stuff his S/O doesn't like— INCLUDING mundane stuff like their clothing?

He surprises you with these, and you can't help but feel attractive in them since he paid extra attending to the complaints you had from your own designs.

“I personally think you look great no matter what you wear. But if you feel so strongly about it, might as well get some stuff you'll actually enjoy wearing.” He'd said when you asked why he did it, and your heart just melted.

You vow to try and work on your self-imagine regardless, which he gets happy over and says he can't wait for you to see yourself the way he does.

[fallenneziah]

Flicker Optimus Prime x Reader

Summary: You and Optimus go for a midnight drive.

Apologies for any spelling mistakes.

Optimus had been stressed lately and it seemed like you were the only one who could see it. You sat near Cade's old shed and watched Optimus interact with his team. You had been hanging out with them for a while and after the battle, you'd been laid off from work, which left more time for the 'bots. 

You sighed. You could tell just by looking at him just how much stress was put on the mech's form. Optimus was saying goodnight to Shane who was being forced off the property again and sent home early. While some of the 'bots like Drift and Crosshairs retired to recharge, Hound, Bumblebee and Optimus seemed to have their processors full. Bumblebee was throwing punches at an imaginary target while Hound lounged. And Optimus struggled to stay still. 

You looked up at the dimming sky. It was roughly 9:40 and the sky would be pitch black by 10:30. You hummed, that gave you an idea. You stood from the shed-side and walked down into the junkyard. You approached Optimus carefully and took his attention from his pacing.

''Y/N? How may I assist you?'' 

You smirked softly. ''I was wondering if you'd like to go for a drive?''

He tilted his head and looked up at his preoccupied team. Then down at you. You nodded and looked out at the road. ''Maybe some silence and just... hanging out?'' Optimus hummed. Ever since you'd started hanging out you'd seemed to be able to read him like an unlocked data pad.

He hummed and nodded, ''Where would you like to go?'' You smiled, ''I have an idea.'' He nodded and walked with you to the end of the dusty lot. The barren road was covered in shadows with little light to cast. His form twisted and turned softly. The sounds of his plating easily shifting into place and folding was music to your ears, and soon his semi-truck form stood before you. You climbed into the open door and allowed the seatbelt to strap you in.

''Where are we going?''

You took hold of the wheel and Optimus drove. You would softly turn the wheel and guide Optimus along the road. You drove near the city and out onto another side road. Optimus hummed in interest as you drove him out into the grassy countryside. 

The tall grassy fields or rolling hills were empty and dark. Street lights stopped just outside of the road. Optimus examined his surroundings and continued until he reached a large, empty field. The field was bordering a wide span of trees. You motioned him to slow and hopped out of the driver's side. You made sure it was clear and he transformed. 

''Y/N? Where are we?''

You took in a deep breath of the fresh air and motioned him closer. ''I want to show you something, trust me.'' 

Optimus was hesitant but followed you into the ditch and the open field. You looked around and smiled. The dark early summer night was perfect. You stepped slowly out into the tall grassy hedges that reached up to your hips. Optimus watched you curiously. You turned back to him and sighed. ''Isn't it pretty?''

You looked up at the night sky. Dim and glistening with bright stars. Optimus ex-vented softly and sat on the side of the road with his pedes intruding on the field. ''It is. Your planet is wonderful...'' You smiled. ''It's nice to just get out into the night and be alone. Everything can weigh heavy on you sometimes. And sometimes you don't know what to do with it.''

Optimus looked at you. ''Ah, yes...''

You shrugged. ''Things don't always work, life isn't always easy. But for every bad thing that happens, you can only come out victorious right? If you think about it, each breath you take is a victory. And sometimes...'' You spread your arms along the grassy plain and spun around in a circle. 

The grass stirred and the blades of grass parted and lit up in a soft glow. Optimus' optics went wide as a zone of fireflies escaped from the grass and floated out into the air. His breath caught in his intake as he stood. He reached out his servo toward them but quickly pulled back in fear of hurting them.

''What..?''

You chuckled. ''Fireflies. Aren't they pretty?'' He looked back at the sky and nodded, ''Yes, they are...'' You spun around through more of the field and woke more of them from their perches. They sprung from the ground like a warm glowing blanket and curled around you and Optimus as they escaped the field. 

Optimus stepped carefully into the field and leaned down. He swept his servo through the grass, his optics lighting up like a sparkling's when the bugs drifted off into the sky. He kneeled and looked at you. ''Y/N...''

He smiled and chuckled. You approached and leaned on his thigh. Optimus looked up and watched the fireflies scatter and disappear back into the darkened night. ''I like to do this, it always acts as a silly little stress reliever.''

The Prime hummed. ''I understand why, it is... a magical experience.'' He held out his servo for you and you climbed on. You came closer to his face and reached out to touch him. ''Even the leader of the esteemed Autobots needs a break, y'know?''

''Thank you, Y/N.'' 

You leaned in and softly kissed the corner of his chipped mask plating. The warm metal was nice and the low hum of his spark was ever-present. He seemed a bit shocked by the action but embraced your gesture regardless.

You patted Optimus' plating and closed your eyes. 

He laid back against the ground and laid you on his chest. You looked up at the twinkling stars as a shooting star passed by the two of you. You hummed and wished in your head. The warm thrum of Optimus' spark from within its chamber warmed your back and released the tension in your muscles. 

[waywardwritesstuff]

Hello, could you create a headcanon for ROTTMNT where Leo and Donnie, separately, fall in love with a female reader who can transform into a giant white snake?

Donnie and Leo x F!Reader Head canons

Tags: romantic, female reader, feelings, confessions Word Count: 900+

Summary: Donnie/Leo fell in love with reader. They didn't plan on it happening but guess what? It did. But how did they act? How did this all go about?

Leonardo

Leo at first was very embarrassed about it, he had known you just as long as he had known April, and you were very important to him. Not to mention the two of you were quite close compared to his brothers.

But despite his feelings, he wasn't a coward, and he wasn't afraid, so he decided to take you out to a sewer pipe he had found perfect for skateboarding and decided to tell you there.

As the two of you were skating around, you in your human form so you could have two legs to stand on the board in the first place, you noticed Leo started to act strange.

"So...you have a boyfriend?" he says out of no where

A bit confused but seeing nothing wrong with his question you answer

"No. Why? Are you interested haha?" You decide to say cheekily, but if you were being honest, you had a small crush on Leo but figured that it was only one-sided, so you never said anything, but that didn't stop you from making "jokes" about it.

"Maybe, what would you say if it did" Leo responded

You are a little unsure now, you are not used to Leo giving a response that wasn't a joke.

"Leo what are you doing" you stop skating now and turn to look at him fully

"What? I'm not doing anything?"

"Your being weird and you know it"

"Can't I ask my friend about their dating life?"

"You can't, not so seriously at least. What is going on"

He hesitates and his green skin starts to darken on his cheeks. Is he blushing? You didn't even know turtles could blush

"Maybe for once I'm not joking, Y/N I have feelings for you" And there it is, he said it. Finally putting his feelings out into the open.

"Leo that's not funny" you say getting a little bit frustraed. This isn't a funny joke and you don't want him messing around with your feelings. Is he doing this because he knows how you feel about him or is he doing it because he genuinely feels the same

"I promise you for once this is not a joke"

"You're being serious"

"I swear on Hueso's Pepperoni Pizza"

Oh shit, he's being serious

"Well, I feel the same. How come it took you so long to tell me?"

"How come it you so long to tell me"

"Touche" You concede

"So are we going to make this official or are we just gonna sit here with these confessions" He asks

With the adrenaline that is now rushing through your body, you step forward and wrap him in a tight hug, giving him a small kiss on his plastron as he wraps his arms around you and plants his own kiss on your forehead.

Donatello

Donnie didn't understand his feelings at first. He ignored the feeling in his stomach whenever the two of you talked, blamed it on bad pizza. He just went about his day like normal and tried not to think about how you made him feel.

But he couldn't deny how important you were to him. He liked listening to you talk, though sometimes he thought you might be a little bit silly he still found whatever you spoke about interesting, simply because you were the one talking. And he cherished the moments when you would sit and listen to him ramble on and on. He knew people got bored of his ranting easily, but you never seemed to lose interest. It was comforting.

Eventually, he figured out what his feelings were and he had no idea what to do about it. He had never had romantic feelings before and he had never been in a relationship. What was he supposed to do?

One day when the two of you were just chatting with him in his room/lab he went quite, which was highly unusual for him. Even when you were talking he was either working on something or simply muttering along to your train of thought.

"Y/N, have you ever fallen in love with anyone?" he asks bluntly

You look at him quizzically waiting for him to go on

"You know...like those feelings when you like someone a lot more than a friend" he explains

"Yes I know what 'falling in love' is, but why do you ask?"

"Well I think that I might have fallen in love with someone, but I do not know what I am supposed to do with those feelings"

"You could tell them how you feel" I say simply

Donnie has a blank look on his face like this was the most insane answer I could have given.

"Ok, well I love you"

You blink once, twice. Before what he says sinks in

"Wait, me? I am the person you fell in love with? But...I'm a mutant" you say hesitantly, why would Donnie fall in love with a mutant snake such as yourself, even other mutants found you frightening.

"So? So am I? What difference does it make?"

You stop "It doesn't but...you really feel that way about me"

"Yes" he says but their is a hesitant note to his voice "Do you not share these feelings"

You were taken aback, you thought after all this time your feelings would have been more obvious to Donnie but apparently not

"Yes of course! I just never said anything because I thought you only saw me as a friend"

"Well I did-" he says truthfully "-but something changed"

Feeling so overcome with emotions you slither up to Donnie and wrap your arms around him before remember how he feels about hugs. But before you can pull away fully he wraps his own arms around you in return.

You couldn't have been more happy in this moment. And you hope to share more moments like this with Donnie in the future.

[wayfayrr]

Read how the Links would not be ok if you liked a villain. Hm…I don’t like a villain, don’t worry lol. But I have thought about Ganon (totk) and how I feel bad for him. My ex told me (as he’s way more familiar w the games than me) that Ganon is evil bc he’s corrupted by gloom from Demise or something. Therefore it’s not completely his fault, because also I mean, no one is just born evil like that. So I’ve sometimes looked at him in the cut scenes (haven’t finished the game yet so idk the ending) and thought “y do we have to hurt him? If he’s just corrupted by the gloom from demise, then y can’t we find a way to save him? Bc then the three parts of the triangle could work together! So how would Tears feel about that idea floating around my head? Bc I’m not romantically interested in Ganon or anything, just wanna save him.

Also from my last ask, me killing the npcs by accident and laughing like a maniac. Yeah so an example of that would be when you have to save the dude w the horn or whatever (from the band) in the big hole he fell into, and get his wagon out too. So I still only had one battery, so when I attached the hot air balloon and flame emitter, it ate my battery too fast to get out. So the first time I didn’t know that’d happen, so we went up then immediately dropped down and it froze the screen on the dude’s face and his speech bubble said something like “omg I’m gonna die! Put me down!!” And then went black. And that’s where I laughed and my roommate looked at me very concerned 😂

On another side note: yeah no, totally don’t change the camera angle to look at Link’s face, or take pictures, or put him in the Gerudo vai outfit bc I think it’s the cutest thing ever lol. What does Wild think of that outfit? What does he think of me liking that outfit?🙈😂

as for the first bit I think he'd respect the thought behind it - it'd be making his life easier if that would be possible after all, which means more time to fawn over you instead! he also respects how hopeful it is, because honestly ganon is as much a pawn to the games code as he used to be too - he isn't even aware of it either, just a soulless husk for the code to puppet for it's tasks. but don't put too much thought into ganon, else he's going to get jealous. Why are you thinking about him so much when he isn't alive, when he's right here!! if you say too much about ganon without stopping to think about him then it's going to really start getting on his nerves.

sfdgvaesvgadvgga that quest becomes so much easier when you realise you can just recall something back up to the top after pushing it into the hole lmao (definitely not how I solved the quest nuh uh) (also I'm guessing by other ask you mean the one where you used link to calculate hp?) but I can see why your roommate was concerned after the fade to black when you were laughing sdfsdfvdsv

also no never zooming in on his face never ever nuh uh

(only the last one is mine, the others are from pintrest)

I think wild would love the vai outfit - like how tears adores the frostbite one, and it's less the outfit itself and more your reaction to them. even if right now they're just your dressup dolls soon enough they'll be able to show off the outfits for you as more than just pixels on a screen <33

[differenteagletragedy]

Cove isn't the stepdad, he's the dad who stepped up

Takes place after Step 3 -- you'd had the summer fling with Baxter and got a little more than you bargained for.

Cove noticed everything about you. He knew all your secrets, all the little quirks of your personality, and as much as he tried not to think about it, he knew all the curves and lines of your body, too.

So that fall when you started college together, sharing a humble two bedroom apartment and gaining your footing in the adult world side by side, he could definitely tell that something was off.

You were sad, for one, and when he tried to console you you'd shrug off his concerns, telling him that everything was fine. He might have chalked up your demeanor to the big life changes you were both going through, but then the sickness started.

At least a few times a week, he saw you dart to the bathroom, hand over your mouth. Sometimes he woke up to the sound of you in there, retching. More and more, he'd come home to find you laid out on the couch, looking more tired than he'd ever seen you.

But it was in November, when he accidentally walked in on you getting dressed in your bedroom, that Cove put everything together.

You were standing in front of your mirror in your bra and a pair of jeans low on your hips, still unbuttoned. The reason, he surmised, was because of the swell of your belly.

"Um ..." was all he managed to get out. You turned to look at him, surprise on your face, then pulled on a baggy sweater before meeting his eyes again.

"What's going on?" he asked quietly, looking down at your stomach. "You're not ... are you?"

Tears sprang to your eyes, and your hands instinctively went to your stomach.

"You are."

You started crying in earnest then, and Cove wasn't sure what to do. He took a few steps towards you then stopped, at a total loss.

When your tears kept flowing, he finally made the final few steps to stand in front of you and took you in his arms. You held onto him tightly, burying your face into his chest.

"Why didn't you tell me?" he asked.

"I didn't want you to hate me."

Your voice was muffled, your face still pressed against him, but he heard you.

"I could never hate you," he said. "Not ever. Not for anything."

The "I love you" stayed inside his lungs, but the words were clearly implied.

"It's just ..." you leaned back a little, wiping your face before shifting to place your cheek back against his body. "It's just that I know I'm really young and this isn't what I planned on. You've always been so supportive and ... so proud of me, and I didn't want you to know that I let you down. And I know you never liked Baxter ..."

"You're not letting me down," Cove began, ready to launch into a speech about how highly he thought of you before his brain caught up with the rest of what you'd said. "Wait, Baxter?"

"It was just a couple of times, and I thought we were being careful, but obviously not," you laughed sadly. "I didn't find out until he left, and he won't answer my calls."

You were right, he never liked Baxter -- he thought it was an astoundingly bad idea when you'd told him you were dating him for the summer -- but now that disklike very quickly and easily morphed to hate.

Sensing that now wasn't the time to go off the handle, Cove took a deep breath and rubbed your back, still holding you close.

"No one else knows," you offered. "I've seen a doctor on campus a few times, but moms don't know, or Liz."

"Are you going to tell them?"

"Yeah, I just ... I don't think it's going to go well, the 'hey, family, I'm going to be a single teen mom, surprise!' talk," you said. "Not really looking forward to it."

He paused, then carefully said, "I can do it with you. The talk and ... this."

You pulled back again to look up at his face, which was smiling down at you.

"What do you mean, 'this'?"

"This," he repeated, glancing down towards your stomach. "You don't have to do it alone."

"And you don't have to do it with me."

"I want to," Cove insisted. "If you want me to."

He told you about how he he could take on extra hours at work to help with any baby-related purchases you needed to make, and how he would help you take care of the baby after it was born. He promised you that your family would be ok with it all, even if it took them a while to come around. He even got on his phone during the conversation and bought an e-book about pregnancy, just to show you he was serious.

"What did I ever do to deserve such a sweet best friend?" you asked when he was done, finally smiling.

He wanted to kiss you then, so badly. But instead, he just smiled back.

Several months passed until he finally worked up the nerve.

You'd had a smooth pregnancy, and like he'd told you, he was there every step of the way. He attended doctor's appointments and researched all he could, and when the time came to actually have the baby, he was camped out in the waiting room, ready to do whatever was needed -- you'd wanted your moms in the delivery room with you for the actual event.

He installed the car seat in the back of his car, then uninstalled it and reinstalled it a few times before finally feeling good about it. He assembled the crib, the bassinet, the changing table, and he made it all fit in your little two-bedroom apartment.

When you and the baby, a little boy you'd given your last name, were ready to come home, he carefully escorted you to his car that was waiting in front of the hospital and secured the both of you before embarking on the most cautious car ride the world may have ever seen.

From there, you settled into a new normal. You'd protested at first, telling Cove that he didn't have to do so much for your baby, but he insisted enough that you finally let it go and let him help. Your heart warmed seeing him hold your son, seeing so much love in his eyes, and Cove melted watching how sweet you were as a mother.

One night, when the baby was a few months old and sleeping for longer stretches in the night, Cove came home from work to see you in the kitchen, hair tied up in a sloppy ponytail and wearing one of his shirts. You felt like a mess, but he always thought you were so beautiful like this.

"Hey," you said, smiling back at him as you washed bottles in the sink. "How was work?"

"Good. How was baby time?"

"Good."

He gave you a grin, then walked up to the sink and gave you a bump with his hip, moving to take over the dishes.

Not giving up so easily, you bumped him back. He laughed, then flicked some water at you.

"Don't start something you can't finish, Holden," you said, moving to put a hand on the sprayer.

"You wouldn't dare."

But you did dare, and a water fight commenced. Careful not to wake the baby, you sprayed water at him as he splashed his hand towards you from under the faucet.

In the dim light of the kitchen, with you finally laughing like your old self after a year of heartbreak and monumental changes, he threw all of his normal hesitation out the window and before he could calculate all the ways it could go wrong, he crashed his lips into yours.

A truce in the water fight was immediately formed as you kissed him back with just as much passion. Like Cove, you'd always been scared of your romantic feelings for him, scared they'd damage the friendship you had -- one of the most important things in your life.

After you found out you were pregnant, you'd let the dream of being with him go entirely, positive that he could never see you that way after having Baxter's baby.

But here you were, and here he was, and there was your baby in the other room, and somehow, things were perfect.

[goodnightmemes]

THE WALKING DEAD SEASON ONE SENTENCE STARTERS

❛ Sometimes I wonder if you even care about us at all. ❜

❛ Make sure you got a round in the chamber and your safety off. ❜

❛ Son of a bitch shot me. You believe that? ❜

❛ Look, I ask and you answer. It's common courtesy, right? ❜

❛ Get away from the windows. ❜

❛ Conserve your ammo. Goes faster than you think. Especially at target practice. ❜

❛ There are others. It's not just us. ❜

❛ Folks got no idea what they're getting into. ❜

❛ We are surviving here. We are day to day. ❜

❛ Listen, whoever you are, I don't mind telling you I'm a little concerned in here. ❜

❛ Have you been listening? You're running out of time. ❜

❛ Yeah, whatever. Yeehaw. You're still a dumbass. ❜

❛ You know what the key to scavenging is? Surviving! You know the key to surviving? Sneaking in and out, tiptoeing. Not shooting up the streets like it's the O.K. Corral. ❜

❛ You were chasing a hallucination, imagining things. It happens. ❜

❛ Hey! Y'all be more polite to a man with a gun! Only common sense. ❜

❛ We survive this by pulling together, not apart. ❜

❛ If bad ideas were an Olympic event, this would take the gold. ❜

❛ You can't leave me. You can't leave me here. Not like this. ❜

❛ At least somebody's having a good day. ❜

❛ Words can be meager things. Sometimes they fall short. ❜

❛ Nothing bit you? Nothing scratched you? ❜

❛ So that's it, huh? You're just gonna walk off? Just to hell with everybody else? ❜

❛ You're putting every single one of us at risk. Just know that. ❜

❛ The world ended. Didn't you get the memo? ❜

❛ Toughest asshole I ever met. Feed him a hammer, he'd crap out nails. ❜

❛ They're not gonna say it so I will. You're scaring people. ❜

❛ Even I think it's a bad idea and I don't even like you much. ❜

❛ There ain't nothing gonna stop him from getting back here to you, I promise you that. ❜

❛ One wrong move, you get an arrow in the ass. Just so you know. ❜

❛ You come back locked and loaded, we'll see which side spills more blood. ❜

❛ Them guns are worth more than gold. Gold won't protect your family or put food on the table. ❜

❛ What life I have I owe to him. ❜

❛ I don't think you fully appreciate the gravity of the situation. ❜

❛ You're the dumbest son of a bitch I ever met. We walked in there ready to kill every last one of you. ❜

❛ The people we've encountered since things fell apart, the worst kind… plunderers, the kind that take by force. ❜

❛ Guess the world changed. ❜

❛ The people here, they all look to me now. I don't even know why. ❜

❛ Hell with them people. Wouldn't piss on them if their heads were on fire. ❜

❛ Unless I've misread the signs, the world seems to have come to an end. At least hit a speed bump for a good long while. ❜

❛ Time…it's important to keep track, isn't it? The days at least. Don't you think? ❜

❛ Do not enter the city. It belongs to the dead now. ❜

❛ I know how the safety works. ❜

❛ We start down that road, where do we draw the line? ❜

❛ Someone needs to have some balls to take care of this damn problem! ❜

❛ We don't kill the living. ❜

❛ I'm sorry for not ever being there. I always thought there'd be more time. I'm here now. ❜

❛ These people need to know who the hell's in charge here, what the rules are. ❜

❛ There are no rules. ❜

❛ We need time to mourn and we need to bury our dead. It's what people do. ❜

❛ I won't leave again. I promise you that. Not for anything. ❜

❛ You save a grave for me? ❜

❛ It's not about what you want. That sound you hear, that's God laughing while you make plans. ❜

❛ We can't stay here. We both know that. ❜

❛ The most important thing here is we need to stay together. ❜

❛ You go on your own, you won't have anyone to watch your back. ❜

❛ Leave me here. I'm done. Just leave me. ❜

❛ The fever… You've been delirious more often than not. ❜

❛ We can't be here, this close to the city after dark. ❜

❛ You got stuff to bring in, you do it now. Once this door closes, it stays closed. ❜

❛ You know, it's over. There's nothing left. ❜

❛ You don't know what it's like out there. You may think you do, but you don't. ❜

❛ We don't have to be afraid anymore. We're safe here. ❜

❛ I lost somebody too. I know how devastating it is. ❜

❛ What's wrong with him? Seriously, is he nuts, medicated, what? ❜

❛ I did the best I could in the time that I had. I hope you'd be proud of that. ❜

❛ We always think there's gonna be more time. ❜

❛ You should've left well enough alone. It would've been so much easier. ❜

❛ I had to keep hope alive, didn't I? ❜

❛ There is no hope. There never was. ❜

❛ What part of "everything is gone" do you not understand? ❜

❛ There's your chance. Take it. ❜

[cherriegyuu]

midnight regrets | bsk

pairing: seungkwan x f!reader genre: angsty kinda? but also fluff maybe? (drunk confession) word count: 848

this is part of my series, seventeen as songs from lover (ts)

Seungkwan ➝ Death By a Thousand Cuts I get drunk, but it's not enough ’Cause the morning comes and you're not my baby ↳ in which Seungkwan drunk calls you, his ex, and finally tells you all the feelings he kept to himself for months.

The clock on your phone told you it was just past four in the morning. Your insomnia had gotten to you yet again and this time it seemed like it had decided to stay. You did everything you were supposed to, ate better, avoided certain smells and foods that could trigger a migraine that could cause insomnia, but none of it seemed to matter. 

In the last couple of days, you only managed to get a total of 5 hours of sleep. It was a wonder in itself that your brain still functioned, poorly of course. 

With a groan, you turned on your side. You just wanted to sleep, like a normal person, for a few hours. Was that really too much to ask? 

Your phone started to vibrate on your bedside, the blue light suddenly pulling the room out of its complete darkness. No one in their right mind would call you in the middle of the night. Not because you would get angry at them but because no one calls anyone at four in the morning. 

Even if the number calling you wasn't saved a contact, it was one you remembered all too well. It was impossible to make your heart stay calm, to keep quiet. But your brain was telling you that there was something wrong. 

It had been almost six months since you and Seungkwan broke up. After the final words had been said, you never saw him again. You returned his things to Vernon and he had left yours with your doorman. You stopped following him on social media and deleted his number. 

The breakup hadn't been bad, per se. When you finally got down to it, you simply realized that you wanted things that Seungkwan didn't seem willing to give to you. 

When you told him that you wanted to break up his only words were "If that's what you really want, I won't do anything to stop you from leaving"

It hurt so much because you felt like he didn't care at all about you and it was clear that your relationship had come to an end way before you finally decided it was time to. 

Truthfully, you were still healing and you knew that taking that call was probably a bad idea. But what if something was wrong? What if he was in some kind of trouble?

After taking a deep breath, you accepted the call.

"Hello?"

"You weren't supposed to take the call," he said with a whine, words slurred.

You settled back against the pillows, relief flooding your body. Nothing was wrong, Seungkwan was just drunk. 

"Was I not? But you called" 

"But you shouldn't have" 

You could see him pout, eyes closed, and furrowed eyebrows. You couldn't hold back the smile that spread on your lips. 

"Why did you call, Seungkwan?"

There was a pause and a sigh. 

Seungkwan always looked cute when drunk, though all of his friends would disagree with you. It was easy to hear to distinguish Vernon's voice saying he called yn and Chan's oh he's drunk drunk.

"I miss you so much" he cried "Did you know that? Every single day I wake up and you're the first person I think about. Sometimes something happens and it's so trivial but I want to call you and tell you about it. And sometimes I wonder where we went wrong and I know isn't an us problem, it was a me problem. It wasn't you because you weren’t perfect for me but I wasn't perfect for you. And I…"

You covered your mouth as if it would be enough to suppress the sound of your small sobs.

"I didn't want perfection, Seungkwan. All I wanted was you"

He whined again, a cry left his mouth and you swear that he fell because the next you heard was Chan's exasperated dude, be careful. 

"I should have said something that day but your words hurt me, so I let my pride take over. I should have asked you why, at least. I do know why but maybe if I asked I would have come up with some sort of argument. And then you returned my things to Vernon because you didn't even want to see me. And you unfollowed me everywhere and I bet you deleted my number. Because you always said hi baby, when I called or Seungkwan? if you were worried. I miss you so much and I love you so much. I want to try again, can you give me another chance? Hm?"

Seungkwan wasn't the kind of drunk who couldn't talk, who was hard to understand. His words got a little slurred and he talked a little bit slower but you could understand every single one of them. His desperation was obvious.

"You're all I ever wanted. I'm sorry I can't say it sober"

You closed your eyes. Maybe you would regret your words but you still wanted to try, even if you and Seungkwan were destined to fail.

“If when you wake up you still feel the same way, we can”

taglist: @wonwooz1, @ryuwonieebae, @sobun1est, @mirtaspace, @feat-sun, @wonvsmile, @belladaises, @mhlsymlysn, @immabecreepin, @miriamxsworld, @aaniag , @sofix-hc7, @scarlet789, @moonlightgrleric, @r6njunlv, @mixling-blog, @k-drama-adict

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[jangofettjamz]

Meds

Jenna ortega x Autistic!Male!Reader

Summary: Jenna sees that you're anxious and encourages you to take your medication.

Words: 871

Jenna POV

Y/N and I just got back from the Doctor to get his prescription for his anxiety meds. He doesn't like taking them, as goes for any medication he has to take, but he needs them in times like these.

He's done so well with going to his appointments, even if he's not confident to go to them by himself he still makes the effort because he cares and wants to look after himself.

However, he can be a little stubborn despite what he'd tell you. He'll refuse to take them sometimes, says the meds make him drowsy, I don't blame him to be honest they do take a lot of energy out of him.

His social battery has practically been drained from having to talk to the receptionist, doctor and pharmacist so talking was gonna be kept to a minimum, which isn't a problem at all because I'm proud of how far he's come to even do that.

He's sitting on the couch playing with hands, he needs his meds but getting him to take them is a different conversation entirely. I'll have to be patient and convince him that it's okay to take them, he's always skeptical about taking them.

I walk up to him and try to get through to him. "Honey you alright? You're fidgeting a lot there, what's on your mind?" He shrugs; like I said his social battery is drained.

"You feeling anxious?" I ask being careful of what to say. He nods his head shyly keeping his hands in his sleeves.

I decided that getting an idea of how anxious he is would determine whether he should take them or not. "Can you tell me how anxious you're feeling right now on a scale of one to ten?" His mouth opened but no words formed, only exasper gasps; he's non verbal.

He immediately hides his face out of embarrassment, he hates being non verbal; finding it extremely frustrating when he can't say how he feels.

"Hey hey hey, that's okay if you can't speak right now babe, can you use your fingers to tell me how bad it is out of ten?" He nods and begins using his fingers to tell me his level of anxiety.

He held up seven fingers, I'd say that's high enough for him to need his meds. "Let me feel your pulse, sweetie." I felt his jugular pulse and it was going quite quick, so was his breathing.

"Your heart's a little fast sweetie, so is your breathing. Are you panicking a little?" He nods.

"Here hold my hand, squeeze if you need to. Take deep breaths with me, in *inhales* and out*exhales*. Good job baby, keep up with those deep breaths for me."

I sit him on my lap and hold him tight with his head on my shoulder, his legs wrapped around my waist as I rock him from side to side as a grounding technique. He was shaking slightly from his oncoming anxiety.

"Oh my sweet baby, I'm here. I'm here for as long as you need me for. I know today was a lot and I'm gonna help you get through it, okay? Just relax in my lap love bug, shhhh." I rub his back while giving him head scratches, that always calmed him a bit.

"I'm your safe space remember, nothing can hurt you when I'm with you. You're safe honey, you're always safe with me." His breathing began to slow and my rocking stops to look in his beautiful eyes.

"Do you wanna take your meds for me?" He shrugs again, atleast it's not a no so this might be easier than anticipated.

"How about this, we give you your meds and we can cuddle for as long as you want, your gonna be really tired after taking them so you may aswell rest with me. Does that sound good?" He nods and gets off my lap so I can prepare his meds.

I prepare a glass of water and bring it to the living room where he is. "Here you go babe" I say handing him the pills. I hold up the glass of water to his lips and he swallows the pills while I help him drink the water "drink up baby boy, you're doing really good" he hates taking pills.

He finishes his water and his pills are swallowed. "All done, good job babe." I coo and kiss his forehead. I seat him back in my lap and lay down on the couch with his head on my chest.

After about 10 minutes he begins to yawn and his eyes become droopy, indicating his sleepiness. "Feeling sleepy, sweetheart?" He nods and I rub his back and rock him to help lull him to sleep.

"I'll hum you a lullaby, just drift off in my arms bubs, it's okay shhhh." I kiss the top of his head with love. The shushing, kisses and rocking made his head woozy and he closed his eyes, my humming was enough to lull him into a deep sleep.

I sighed with contentment, he was wrapped in my arms, light snores filling out the silence. My eyes slowly shut as I followed him into sleep with him snuggled up in my arms.

[film-in-my-soul]

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[thelunarfairy]

The lonely prince of the moon 🌙

Have you made your wish to him today? Did not you know? The Moon Prince can grant wishes, but he asks for one thing in return.

If your desire is to find out more about him, then you will have to give him your patience, because this little boy will not fulfill your wish so easily, how long have you been waiting for this?

Amane and Hanako, two names of the same person. Two versions, same story. It's incredibly contradictory how at the same time he can be such a charismatic boy and so isolated.

But, if we are going to talk about our little dreamer, let's separate him into periods.

Amane, the shy and introverted boy. He had no friends and didn't seem interested in finding any. He lived alone with his own thoughts. Could this boy be more mysterious? The marks on his skin left a trail of violence without us knowing who was to blame, and even if he was, for Amane there was no guilt.

The marked boy, the way he looked at the marks, as something he had to bear alone. People shouldn't meddle, that's what he decided.

Loneliness…

A word that is apparently part of his life, despite being born alongside the person he loved most in life. He was lonely, and didn't seem to feel loved. He wanted to leave Earth, such a bad place for him.

Amane wanted to conquer the Moon, she was so brilliant, the feeling of welcome she gave him, as if she said that if he could reach her, he would be free, he would be happy.

The way he found to get to heaven…

He went, but didn't reach the Moon, the Earth pulled him back.

Amane dies and Hanako is born.

Equally lonely and with a big weight on his back. He had two sins now, that of having killed his own brother and of having taken his own life, at least, that's all we know.

The so fragile and defenseless Amane was suffocated into his chest. And he was trapped for so long that when he resurfaces, Hanako doesn't know how to act.

When does Amane return?

When a little mermaid decides to show him her charms.

Mermaid?

Who was the girl who called him the first time?

He likes to call her Yashiro. I think you know

The first person who saw him. He wasn't an evil apparition, nor a ghost, nor a strange, perverted boy, he was her friend. Isn't that what she said?

She was the only one who little by little helped Hanako to show a little of Amane, because even though now he is the great 7 of the 7 mysteries, the great powerful ghost… He is still Amane.

There is a big difference between them. Hanako is extremely charismatic, fun, likes to joke and make stupid jokes. He has good intentions and protects those he loves. And above all, he is not a coward. Even if he made a mistake, he admits his mistake and regrets it.

But, it doesn't end up that way. He is also the person who killed his own brother, he is the person who has good intentions in some cases but solves problems in the wrong way, he uses people to achieve his own goal without thinking about what they will feel.

There is a dark side to him.

And he hates him.

This dark side that we gradually get to know, even if it hides it. And he does it so well it scares me.

People always find justifications for what he does.

He wanted to lock the girl he loves in a fake world without giving her the chance to choose, because he knew she wouldn't want to, and he decided on his own that she would live happily without him.

Good intention, bad execution.

Hanako's dark side became justifiable because people fell in love with him. Because of his dangerous charisma. Because of Amane's fragility, which sometimes reflects on Hanako.

Make no mistake, Hanako didn't stay social after he stopped being Amane Yugi, he likes Yashiro, she was the only person he had any real interest in.

Kou joined the group by force, if you remember how it all started.

Where are Hanako's other friends?

The other supernaturals either respect him or hate him. There is no middle ground.

Why don't Amane and Hanako like the idea of having friends? If there is this charisma if he has this personality that is so easily captivating, then why did he choose that?

To hide the secrets? Because he is afraid of doing something to his own friends and is afraid of losing them?

Because in the PP arc, where the ideal world of the "protagonists" was reflected, did he have friends? Did he want this?

What was stopping him?

Hanako has reflected the waning Moon in his own eyes, a well-lit and beautiful part that draws everyone's attention… And another dark part, that no one can see what it hides….

That sums it up well. The lonely prince of the Moon who wanted to be loved, but was afraid to love too much…. Why?

The boy who only had a short time to live, the one who wasn't going anywhere, the one who pushed his younger brother away just because he wanted to be healthy like him. The boy who cried at night while waiting for his brother to return, who perhaps asked the moon to bring him back. He was alone, but he didn't want to be.

So when Brother came back, he didn't feel like he was enough. Because of him Amane couldn't help but fear that one day he would leave again, because of him Amane endured things he didn't know he could, because of him Amane committed his greatest sin, or what affects him most, because of him the Amane didn't allow himself to love again.

He didn't deserve to love and be loved. That's what he thought. He didn't deserve to be alive, nor to go to the moon to fulfill his own dreams. He deserved to be alone and suffer for eternity, because nothing he does will take away the guilt.

But he got a new chance.

He is being loved again, or for the first time.

Even though he's running away, he wants this… He wants to be loved, to be forgiven, he wants to make things right.

All Hanako, or rather Amane, wants is to have a normal life, like everyone else. 🌟

[notsofunsenpai]

This is part 8

Part 7

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Lucifer takes his place on his throne,already irritated, and the meeting hasn't even started. He had an idea of what the meeting was gonna be about,how this and that should be allowed that or about the extermination. He had no choice or power of what the angels do,he's tried to get through almost everyone up there,and yet they don't want to hear a single word of what he has to say. This meeting was pointless. Usually he doesn't take these meeting seriously,maybe even taunt or poke fun at Satan sometimes,other times he's sweet and listens to them then make up some sort of plan to ease their minds,but today,he doesn't know what happen. Maybe he woke up on the wrong side of the bed or something because he felt angry and bothered this time.

"Well,isn't it our favorite leader who's been MIA for so long. How's the wife?" Mammon wickedly says,looking up at the king himself,as he was in the lower section of the seating.

The king himself forces a laugh that lacks the amusement in his voice,"How's that diet going you fat fuc-"

"Woah,woah. Everyone calms down, and the meeting hasn't started yet. We're still missing people." Asmodeus stopping the bickering amongst the two.

"Yeahh,chill. There is no need for that,let's try to be professional, at least." Beelzebub adds,not wanting to deal with another fight breaking out.

The king sighed,looking around, noticing Satan was there and looked like he had something to say,Leviathan(Levy),and Belphegor weren't there yet. That's fine because they were a little early anyhow.

"Was just asking about his wife." Mammon venomous replied back.

"Yeah,fuck off with that bullshit.",Beelzebub said not amused as everyone knows or pretty much knew what had happened. "It's none of your business." She adds.

"Thank you Bee,at least you two respect my choices, unlike a dumbass clown." Lucifer glares down at Mammon.

Mammon was about to say something slick until Satan spoke up,with irritation in his voice and facial expression.

"Nice of you to finally show up." Satan roars,fire coming from his nose,"Thought you'd skip this one like always." He growls as Lucifer closes his eyes,leaning back in his chair, trying to calm his nerves,running his pale fingers through his hair. He opens his eyes again to Satan,"If it's about calling you out in the last one,my bad,I shouldn't have called you out last time." He gives his best apogetic smile he could,but truth be told, he didn't mean a single word he said. The other knew and growled,leaning back into his chair that was made for him,keeping quiet for now.Leviathan was the next to show up,both heads both greeted the King in which he returns with a kind smile as they took a seat next to Mammon in which he immediately starts hitting on the left head,the more prettier one to him. The right head looked annoyed as she made them move away from the green male to next to somewhere near Bel and Asmodeus.

They waited and waited,Lucifer checked his watch on his phone,not looking surprised,he hadn't been paying attention to what the others were saying. He's been zoning out and disassociating,he didn't care what others had to say or what they were talking about,he hears the door opens as finally the last sin,Belphegor or Bel had finally arrived.

"Sorry.. got caught up with something." She chuckles weakly and dryly.

Mammon does a belly laugh,"Been hitting them shrooms again, eh?" He grins at her.

"Something like that along with falling asleep. My baad. Won't be late again." She says,knowing it was a lie, but they couldn't start the meeting without her because everyone must attend for the meeting to start. She takes he seat next to Beelzebub.

Satan starts them out,"Well, as you all know or are awear of,the problems of hell. Underlings, trying to rise up with breaking the rules of hell,along with the angels and heavens war against us. Very disgusting!" He aggressively spew out.

"Well, maybe we wouldn't have to deal with it if our pretty Angel wouldn't have let it happen to begin with,and should have grown some balls to heaven and all of their bitches up there." Mammon jabs at the blonde.

"Suck a dick,you don't know his situation, so don't go throwing jabs out of nowhere asshat!" Bee said, defending the king while flipping the jester off.

"I agree,sure having them kill our people isn't idea,but they are only attacking the ring of pride for now,so we gotta help out some no matter what ring. Im sure the king would do the same for any of us. Also, for the other problem. Let them do whatever they want,they aren't hurting anyone. There is nothing wrong with wanting to be stronger and making sure to protect yourself and love ones." Asmodeus, soothing voice ring through the room.

"He's got a point. There are fewer problems, less work for me, and more sleep I can get."Belphegor nonchalantly says,resting her head down on the table.

"I agree with Mammon,we shouldn't have to be stuck in Lucifer's mess" the Right head of Leviathan says as the left head rolls her eyes,slightly envious that Mammon favors the Right head more before she speaks her mind.

"Both sides have it pros and cons,hells been through a lot and is valuable along with losing to many people yet things happened that can't be helped. We gotta figure out some solution. " She says.

"Well, luci? What do you think, hmm~? We're all waiting for you to answer."Mammon taunts,Lucifer almost didn't catch what he said because he was busy texting his partner and adoring how cute his daughter looked playing at the playground with her hair in buns.

He puts his phone down to look at the other with blank eyes. "Uhh...uhh," He said, trying to think of something as Satan lashes out.

"PAY ATTENTION!! WE'VE BEEN DISCUSSING WHILE YOU RUDELY WERE ON THE PHONE!" He yells loudly.

The blonde put his head in his hand while crossing his left leg over the right,staring at wrath in his eyes."You know my answer,it'll be the same. It won't change,but you're to hard headed to even process that in your little head, huh?" He said coldly.

Satan blew out fire in anger as he started shouting,as Asmodeus and Leviathan tried to calm him down before he set the place ablaze.

"Oh shit..,Looks like it's time for a recess! Let's all take a break and calm our nerves some before we do anything we'll regret. " Beelzebub quickly says,eyes widening as Mammon laughs.

"I'm always down for a thirty minute sleep.." Belphegor says,rubbing her eyes, never saying no for a good sleep or nap.

"Fine. We'll take a quick thirty. We'll discuss some more afterward." The blonde simply dismisses them for a break,they take their leave as he does ignoring any comments they have for him. He doesn't have time for their shit. He goes outside somewhere on top of the building,putting his face in his face,sighing loudly and cursing. "Fuck me,why did he bring up Lilith!? Ugh!" Feeling tears running down his now slightly red face,eyebrows knitting together. He did his best to wipe his tears,then look at the golden band on his ring finger,rubbing over it with his thumb. "Don't think about her,not now. She's not in your life anymore.. she left. She's not coming back,and you have someone else in your life. You love Alastor very much,he's your partner now."He says over and over,trying to soothe the pain that's been there for years. There were always times when he wanted to throw his wedding ring,many times, but he never had the courage to actually do it,it kinda brought comfort to him. He hoped many years ago she'd come back,but each year where he hoped he was just destroyed, so he gave up on her for once and earned the trust of someone else. He never lost hope and faith with Alastor,he was patient somewhat, and it paid off eventually. The red-haired male gave and showed him more love than Lillith ever could,the support he needed, along with helping to raise his daughter. He's very grateful as he wipes away the last of his tears,using his sleave to try to dry his face as he takes a deep breath and then exhales,"You got this." He looks at the sky,knowing it was getting late,it was all red but for him it was easy to tell because some parts of the sky would be slightly a darker shade of red indicating it was getting close to night time or it already was. Fuck..this meeting wasn't supposed to take long,if someone wasn't late and if they didn't spent most of the time bickering he'd be home spending time with his family. He sighs before finally heading back to the meeting place. He enters the place,taking his seat once again as the others are already waiting for him,he can see their eyes. Can already see Mammon saying something not worth his time along with Satans anger brewing that he took longer than he should have as Bee and Asmodeus gave him a look of pitty while Belphegor and Leviathan probably don't care much about the meeting which is fair. "Before we start." Lucifer speaks,voice and tone filled with malicious. "If your conversations aren't filled with suggestions or with use to me,keep your mouths shut." His face slightly darkens as his frowns deepen."I don't have time for whatever bullshit. I may be the leader of hell, but I can't solve everything. We're only demons,we have our limits, and so do they, and all we can do is fight. It's not an idea of the plan with heaven,it's really not, but I had to do what I had to do. I'm stressing out already,I'm ending this meeting early. It's gone on way too long." He speaks out,standing up.

He summons a portal

"All I ask is for some help,and for the next meeting,don't waste my time with things I already know." He warns,glaring at Satan and Mammon before walking into the portal,not wanting or to listen to what the others were saying. He curses under his breath,running his fingers through his hair, over and over. At this point, it's been a bad habit of some sort. He see the other end of the portal,when he reaches it,his hands were still going through his silky locks,"Fucking dumbasses.. Hope they all rot in hell for the rest of their days." He says stepping out of the portal that lead to his home.

His ears heard the soft sounds of his partner's laugher,"My,eventful day love?"

He slightly jumps,think of it as a late reflex of some sort.

A groan escape his lips ,"You have no idea. God I hate that greedy fuck." He truly did. He walks towards his husband, sitting down along with taking his glass of whiskey and drinking it. Alastor gets up for a moment to go to the counter as Lucifer pours him a few cups of the rum,quickly drinking them in seconds. God,he's gonna puke that up. He already feels his stomach not handling it due to the stress and quickly downing like three glasses of rum.

"What happened at the meeting?"Alastor places the plate of food down in front of him in response he quickly but without thinking starts eating the food. He realizes he hasn't eaten since breakfast. My god, he felt hungry now,the chicken & Quinoa felt heavenly ,it was just he needed after a hard day.

"Long story short, there was a slight 'disagreement', and the meeting that was supposed to be like two hours ended up longing itself to almost the whole day. That's all I'm gonna say about it. By the way,wonderful meal as always dear."He repiles,voice filled with love and happiness.

"Thank you." The short king could sense his partner's smile miles away, which followed with a kiss and a hug.He kisses back happily then quickly eating his dinner,hearing Alastor warning him not to eat fast because of indigestion or something then takes the now empty plate to the sink to wash it. He pays no mind,one drink wasn't doing it for him, and he needed some more alcohol to make him less tense. Grabbing the bottle of rum,he pours himself one glass, then drinks it,then one more. He needed a few more shots or glasses to be drunk,but the way his stomach was feeling.. he was gonna upchuck all of it but he held it down.He then sees one of Alastor's tentacles from his back take the liquor from his hands,frowning,"Hey!"He wasn't done drinking.

"Don't drink your problems away love.it won't solve anything. " He hears the other saying along with the sound of him screwing the bottle cap back on the rum. He stares down at the tabel for a split second,"I know.." He then stands up way quickly to his liking,feeling slightly dizzy while his stomach doing flips. He honestly doesn't know how he's holding down from puking. He walks to his lover,wrapping his arms around him,noted the angel is awkward slightly, and it becomes a sideways hug, but a hug is a hug nonetheless.

"May I have that massage now,please?" He asks gently,he needs it badly.

"Of course." The taller male replies,god,he loves him so much.

"Ah! Feels so good!"Lucifer groans,feeling all of his problems at the moment going away,feeling Alastor massaging away at any knots he had in his body. When they started, he didn't feel like the massage was working but didn't say anything. Then, within a few minutes, he started to feel the progress that was happening. Before this he had changed into a white short sleave shirt with a sleeping duck on it along with matching shorts,he had decided to lay on his stomach. Probably wasn't the best idea but once again,he decided to ignore it. His eyelids begin feeling heavy,feeling sleep over come him along with letting Alastor do whatever he pleases. It all happened so fast within the second Lucifer awoke,he was coughing like crazy,feeling the stomach acid rising . With that quick information,he ran to the bathroom as quickly as possible before he blew chucks all over the place. He runs to the toilet,as everything he had ingested sky rocketed out of his mouth. His tummy hunted badly, too, but he couldn't stop puking :(

He knew his puking was loud,feeling his partner patting his back so he didn't end up dying from choking on his own vomit.

"Told you not to eat to fast." His partner comments.

He sniffs slightly,eyes tearing up with coughing alittle more,"S-Shut ...up.."He answers back. He thought he was done puking, but when he attempted to stand up, he ended up being back onto his knees,puking again. Alastor had left for a second to bring him some water for him to drink after he was done.

Flushing the toilet,he gently drinks the water slowly this time so he doesn't barf again. Then, he places the cup down onto the sink,"Thank you.." He genuinely said with gratitude that he stayed by his side. His partner kisses his face with a smile,"Always. Brush your teeth first, and we'll cuddle when you come back to bed."He says.

Lucifer beams gently at the other,"Hey,I love you,Bambi." As he grabs his toothbrush and paste.

"Love you too,my dear." The other faintly grinned at the blonde before heading back to bed.

Lucifer brushes his teeth in silence,spitting and gargling with mouth wash before going back to bed and going under the covers. Immediately, arms wrapped around him,he nuzzles into the crook of his lover's neck,enjoying the warmth he gave off. Alastor sneaks some kisses in while gently rubbing his back before they fall asleep together.

[megabuild]

hi how is ethubs toxic for etho? I’m curious, and don’t really care either way lol just wanted to see your perspective (I think you implied it in a post of yours)

so i would personally interpret ethubs as toxic from both sides and it feels unfair when analysing something like that to say "this person definitively had the Worse Experience" because that's not something you can measure- having said that i definitely like to look at etho's more, mainly because it lines up with my own personal experiences and is also something that i don't see discussed very much.

ethubs as a whole can be difficult to read as toxic sometimes because as a viewer you're already aware the two actors are close friends outside of the roleplay and so their constant back and forth and commitment to each other is obviously in part because of that but as characters they very much read to me as dependent to an unhealthy degree. all of last life functions as a push-pull exercise, mainly with bdubs as the one pulling while etho allows himself to get pulled along even into intense danger for them both until he realises bdubs is pulling him off a cliff edge and pushes (the wither fight/telling bdubs he won't give him a life). bdubs demands a lot from him, often pointing to "the good old days" and promising that once etho does whatever he needs to do things will go back to normal- to the point where etho himself starts leaning into that idea, telling bdubs "we can be buddies again!" in their final meeting despite this, again, being a death game where there is no hope for either of them. this could still be read as just a very committed relationship but what sets it against etho for me is that bdubs is (unintentionally) emotionally manipulative- he is desperate to stay with etho, of course he is! and often directs comments towards etho insinuating other people won't get him the way bdubs does (an element of truth- etho is a lone wolf and was never as open with his other allies as he was with bdubs) and, most importantly, telling etho to kill himself in order to join him as a red life or else he will kill him himself. this is bad!

bdubs is also an incredibly reckless character, which isn't really a toxic trait but in their partnership becomes significant as etho is always chasing after him to try and save him- while etho never directly gives him a life of his own he is constantly at ends trying to find lives for him, be that in asking tango, striking deals with scar, or allowing bdubs to kill tango despite having the means to stop him. stuff like when bdubs trades off a life for the enchanter and etho frustratedly says back "i care about bdubs more than i care about the enchanter!" bdubs is constantly working towards a win for them both (and i don't doubt that had it been the two of them left, he would have asked etho to kill him- he does this all through his own warped perception of loyalty) while etho is constantly working just to keep them alive and safe and the two ideals end up clashing a lot.

does all of this make a toxic relationship? not in every case. but to me (again, likely because of personal similar experience and bias) it reads very much like that and i think if etho was more into the roleplay and displayed even the slightest bit of distress it would suddenly look INCREDIBLY apparent. part of the reason it doesn't is because as a character he is used to hiding his true feelings and discomfort in order to survive.

[shoechoe]

I was wondering if you had any thoughts on the ideas I mentioned in the reblog for making the Giorno-Diavolo beef more compelling from a little while ago. Not to sound needy, but because you’re A.) the most invested Diavolo fan I’ve seen so far (not a criticism) and B.) actually base that on accurate in-depth analysis and observation of the story (compliment). If not, it’s fine.

I definitely do. (Sorry, I don't intend to be dismissive when I don't make responses to people's comments and reblogs. I just don't have time to respond immediately and sometimes stuff just gets swept out of sight and I end up never replying.)

For a start, I think your first "Giorno has his own identity crisis" concept is very compelling. Having a more in-depth look as to what exactly is going on inside Giorno's head would've easily improved his character. A big trait of his comes in the form of the other characters seeing him as a leader figure, and to them, it seems to just be a natural air to him- but we also know that when he was a young child, he was perceived as quiet and gloomy. Watching him craft his own identity and figure out how to sway the people around him to his side would've added a lot of dimension to that trait because we as an audience would know that it isn't actually a "natural" air at all. It would've also paralleled Dio's childhood in a lot of ways.

As for how that would contrast with Diavolo and Doppio (and also to mention your idea of Doppio starting off as an ally character), I will tell you that I have issues when it comes to really imagining a rewrite of Diavolo and Doppio because they are, by design, very bad representations of DID. They are written off of old horror movie tropes originating from the societal idea that mentally ill people (in their case, people with DID) are scary and dangerous. As characters, that's kind of imbued at their core. You can rearrange the themes of the story to make them more compelling (and I don't necessarily think DID representation in Jojo has to be the most 1:1 reflection of real life as long as there's an air of respect and care present) but there's no real fixing something inherent to their design.

I do think there are really interesting themes present with how Diavolo's motivation of identity erasure intersects with his DID, but in order to salvage those parts and excise the aggressive demonization of his mental illness, you'd have to make him a completely different character. (This is a big reason why I don't ever really propose solutions to "fix" him and Doppio because, for the most part, I don't think you can.)

The idea of Diavolo being the mysterious gangster who saved Giorno is honestly something I'm surprised I haven't heard more as an idea. That would imply that there was a time in the past when

1. Diavolo was a mob boss but wasn't completely in hiding yet (it would only make sense if this was the case since you kind of have to talk to people to start a mafia) and

2. Diavolo, in his past, was not only less extreme, but also capable of being caring in some sense. This is sort of suggested with Donatella, but he also abandoned her without a trace before he started his mafia, which suggests he was already at least kind of a nonreciprocal asshole to begin with.

I think you would have to do some character reworking to have Diavolo helping a child (even in response to him saving his life) really fit with him. That being said, I can see it as a potential idea for a VA rewrite. In that version I would probably add that in Diavolo's early years as a Boss he wasn't as aggressive or greedy, but as he got more powerful he became more reclusive and stopped caring about being nice to anyone in any way.

[fandoms-in-law]

To the Past Versions

Summary: Steve gets pushed to write letters to his past by Dustin, and then Robin when he isn't nice in the first. It does eventually help him.

Authors note: I am ever confused when words fall easily. I write constantly so it happens often enough, but if I have a prompt I expect to get stuck. Today I did not, happily so.

The idea for this fic: Dear self esteem* as a Steve fic except he's really just writing to memories, wondering when he stopped feeling like he could do anything/be anything

*A sanders sides fic I wrote a while back

/\/\

Attempt 1:

Hey Steve,

So Dustin has it in his head that we all need to write to the past to get mentally healthy or something, sounds like bullshit, which is what you are, so I picked you to write to.

You’re so wrapped up in yourself, you don’t even realise how much of an asshole you are. You Don’t treat Nancy right now, and barely get better after you sleep with her. You’re a complete jackass, who I and everyone I’ve basically ever met hates and that’s without knowing you most of the time.

Literally, I meet people I thought were complete strangers, or maybe classmates I never interacted with, and get told how horrible you are. That’s how bad you are. You’re worse than complete garbage and trust me, I’ve met men like that enough to know.

Get your head out of your ass, stop bullying people for no reason and fucking learn money solves basically nothing. It just lets you pretend the problem isn’t there until you run out of it.

Thanks for nothing, And better grovel for Nancy to help you learn to be better, you useless prick.

Steve.

Attempt 2:

So, somehow Robin found out about my first letter and got mad about it? She’s telling me to right to a past me that I actually like and seems set on doing so until she thinks I’m healthier. There were threats to show it to Dustin involved and I do not want to know how he’d react. He’s already acting oddly, along with the other kids since Robs found it. I think she spoke to them too.

Sorry for the ramble, Steve, hello.

You’ll meet Robin soon so don’t worry over having no clue who she is. The kids have already inserted themselves into your lives and I still agree that you’re better for it.

I think the first time I actually liked myself was because of those kids. For once I wasn’t a Harrington, or a basketball player; I was a guy who could help them, protect them in a way Nancy never let me feel like I had done. (We both know I was the one who won against that demogorgan not her or Jonathan though)

Times are shit for you outside of the kids though, but I miss those days. Even if Billy liked to lord over me that he was king now, it was nice to be in the background at school, and stand a chance of learning in lessons instead of Tommy yanking me into parties or rubbish that I never enjoyed. Heck I even enjoyed a few of the classes that year. Who knew I could be interested in that stuff?

Life gets better though, even if it comes looking like horrid situations sometimes. And the kids will be there nagging you through it all. I love those shitheads.

Keep going.

Steve.

Attempt 3:

Hey Steve,

Erica would have gotten involved regardless. It might be horrible that you and Robin were the ones to do it when she was so young, but I think it was better for her. This last time was the worst and I’m glad she wasn’t trying to understand it all without something to get out of it. You don’t have to carry that guilt forever. At least share some of it with Robin since she was the one who came up with the idea and acted before asking me or Dustin if it was sensible to try.

I wish you had done that ceremonial burning of the scoops outfit though. You and Robs joked about it so much in the weeks after the fire but here I am, with Eddie fucking Munson begging me to wear it again just so he can see the old uniform fully assembled.

Seriously, go burn it now whenever you don’t get a letter from the future appearing

Steve

Attempt 4:

Dear Steve,

Kiddo, you know these people you think are friends aren’t. I wouldn’t call the kids I look after kiddo but somehow it works for 13yr old me. Popularity isn’t friendship, it’s people pretending to like you because they think that’ll get them something; I wish you weren’t so desperate for friendship and connection you fell into it.

This is the last year I remember trying to stop someone insulting another person. You got called a bleeding heart for months and if you even grimace at the worst bullying happening around you Tommy or one of the other people hanging onto you would turn everything onto ‘bleeding heart Harrington’. The poker face you develop because of it still hasn’t been broken when Eddie decides everyone should play cards.

Steve, you have hell coming before you, and despite the monsters and location that matches that name better to most people, for you that is high school and being forced to the top all because you wanted friends. You get through it, you find monsters and discover what real friendship is after all of that. I think someone in history class said something about if you’re going through hell keep going and that’s what you need to do, what I did.

But, kid, still keep trying to be kind when you can. I know it feels precarious, dangerous, to have everyone looking at you and see the bullying they do to anyone shown to be human. I know how scared I felt that it’d turn on me if I refused any of those people I thought were friends too much, but you try, I tried, as much as I could for as long as I could, until I got here.

You’re going to be lonely for a while, Steve, but not forever, I promise you that.

I’ll see you in my reflection when I get stunned by my friends. They’ll find you eventually.

Steve

Attempt 5:

Dear Steve,

I dug out a picture to write this. One mom took just before leaving saying she’d get it developed so she could never forget her darling boy. Two promises broken at once because I found that camera, and the film still inside it a decade later, the picture still undeveloped until I asked Jonathan if he could.

Dustin was right when he read somewhere that writing to our past could help us feel better, but he was wrong too. He suggested times I could write to for stupid things or times following what he thinks are the big traumas, but those are easy. I knew more of the world then, but you’re just a kid, younger than Erica was when I got to know her and needing far more protection than I think she’s ever done.

If Robin had brought you into the back room of Scoops that day I might’ve done the most sensible thing ever and just driven out of Hawkins, you and Dustin packed into the back seat to try and figure out how to survive. Until Mrs Henderson took Dustin back because she loves him so much.

Sometimes it hurts to witness that, because of your year, 8yrs old and absolutely sure I was a big boy who could cope with a few nights home alone because mom wanted to go with father on a short trip. You shouldn’t have been, have needed to be, and for a long time I’ve been sad about that.

Mom and father were home last week and she found the picture, said she didn’t remember getting it developed. I didn’t correct her. Because you were lonely, scared, for so long, and now I’m mad.

I know you get through it, become the best cook to start taking home economics and almost kill yourself mixing cleaning products enough times you didn’t need chemistry class to tell you what makes poisonous gases. You get to become me eventually, but you shouldn’t have. I could never imagine leaving one of the kids I look after home alone in the way you were, and that’s on our parents. They failed you, even before now, but at 8 was the first time you wondered it. You didn’t need to correct yourself then although I know you did. Mom and father failed you.

We make it, and they will realise they’ve been strangers my whole life when they come home to emptied rooms, bills unpaid and no forwarding address. I move out next week to an apartment with friends.

You will have company again.

Steve

Attempt 6:

Your majesty, King Steve,

Eddie is pretty funny and I think I need his flavour of madness right now. Last time I tried to write to you I got mad, at myself more than at you. Then Robin both got mad and started paying attention to how she and everyone talks to me or about who I’ve been. She’s still mad but at herself and others now.

You aren’t good, Steve, but you weren’t as horrible as I began to think. I mean, even at what everyone thinks is my worst I went back to save Nancy. Robin pointed that out to me, sat down and dissected things I was sure I did at my worst, before Nance and I were officially dating.

Some things surprised her and I like knowing that I was a good friend, even to people who weren’t, because you are. You are there giving Carol pudding pots when Tommy ruins hers; there checking no one on the swim or basketball teams gets too hurt by teasing; there trying to make sure everyone claiming to be your friend has what they need.

Those aren’t things a bad person would do, just someone so caught up in protecting themself from the pain of loneliness and isolation that they compromise themself for company. Okay, Robin told me that too, but it tracks.

Most importantly, when I get the chance to be better, to know real connections, I take it. That’s pretty great of you.

Thanks Steve. You take the biggest step for us.

Attempt 7:

To Myself,

It’s been a long journey and I never thought I’d write to myself half so much as I have.

I’ve been popular, lonely, both at once, heartbroken, loved and to hell only to come out fighting. Concussions are far too familiar a sensation and I could probably make do living in the woods with the ways I learnt to cook.

Life is a trip and apparently I don’t get a choice about living it. But in all the letters to our past I’ve written there’s one thing I realised I’ve wanted someone to tell me for years and that’s that it’s okay to mess up. It’s okay if I wasn’t always the nicest person, or that I’m not smart, hardly perfect and have very little will to fight for myself or against other people. I don’t need to be perfect because with the right people we can make a wonderful imperfect family.

To us, Steve. To being myself, as best I know how.