#sometimes i do just strongly feel the sentiment of ‘fuck doctors’

[goldlightsaber]

i’ll be enjoying myself and then get stopped in my tracks by the knowledge that for four years this joy was inaccessible to me mostly because of a stupid fucking drug doctors told me to take. the grief just knocks the wind out of me every time

[crapitskizaru]

Partner with an incurable disease: The Supernovas Edition

Hi! It's me again! I really enjoy your blog ❤ thanks for making me squeal everytime I log in to Tumblr ❤ By the way, I have something to ask again! Can you do a h/c where Luffy, Law, Zoro, X-Drake, Bonney, Hawkins, Kidd, Killer, Apoo, Urogue and Capone (basically Supernovas) react to finding out their s/o with a terminal disease? Like, its an incurable one? (coz I'm an evil brat, sorry not sorry, mwahaha) that even Law's ability can't do shit? I hope this is not too much! Have a nice day dear!

Warning: angst af and a rather long post ahead

Monkey D. Fluffy 

“I don’t care, I’m not going to let you die!” 

we all know he’d never accept this, and try to prevent the inevitable, even if he’s not really sure what to do and which medications he should seek for

Luffy wouldn’t really try to dig into the reason for his partner’s condition, he just needs a simple task that he can follow in order for them to survive

and when they don’t, even despite the boy’s pure intentions, he feels just as if he lost Ace for the second time 

it would take a long time, and a lot of support from the Strawhats for the boy to get over it

Trafalgar Law 

“I’m a doctor. You’re not leaving me, (Name)-ya. Not on my watch.”

but after all the check-ups and tests, deep down he knows there’s nothing to prevent their death, and that no matter how much he tries, the end result with always be the same 

with this realization, he’d also lose his sense of purpose and all the goals that he wanted to achieve 

“If you die...What else would be left in this world for me?” 

so the man watches as life slowly leaves his partner’s body and soul with numb resignation, and would remain the same after their death 

his crew would be the one to lift him up somehow, but it wouldn’t be enough for sure 

he gets even more bitter, even more distant and empty, but I think he’d carry on until he either becomes the Pirate King or helps Luffy in becoming one 

and after that, he feels like he can finally let it all go and indulge into his sadness, since there’s nothing else left for him to do

Roronoa Zoro 

“How long do we have left?”

as much as he despises the sheer idea of it, he’d try to accept the facts and make peace with them, the sooner the better 

wants to spend the whole time with them, not even necessarily talking, just simply being together and enjoying the simplest things about life

he wouldn’t talk much, if not at all, trying to remember every detail of their face, the tone of their voice and the manner in which they talk, to have something to remember 

his coping mechanism involves spending his entire time training, exercising, getting stronger, to make sure he won’t fail his captain the same way he failed his partner

since, in his heart, he feels like it’s his fault they died, and that he could have done something to prevent it 

Drake the T-rex 

“No, please.”

he wants to cherish every moment he spends with his partner, whether on simple conversations, making promises, or staring off at the open ocean 

makes sure they see as many wonders of the world as possible, that they are in their happiest state with no regrets 

“That’s the least I can do for you.” 

at night, when he holds them in his arms and listens to their calm breathing, he can’t help but shed a few tears, knowing that there’ll come a day when they won’t be around anymore, that he won’t be able to get their advice or simply trust anyone with his fears 

as their body gets close to giving up, the man shifts into his most vulnerable state and sheer frustration 

since he sees the only person who gives him hope, and who he can confide in, literally dying in front of his eyes and there’s nothing he can do 

i don’t think he’d ever be able to form a relationship with anyone anymore, not after something like this 

Jewelry Bonney 

“No. No, you’re not.” 

whenever she sees her partner, feels their touch, holds them in her arms, or simply hears them talk, she can’t help but burst into tears 

“Tell me what to do. Tell me and I’ll do it.” 

she’d seek for a cure, all the way till the end, so that she will be able to say that she’s done everything in her power to help them 

would spend a lot of time either hugging them, or relishing in their closeness in their calming embrace 

wants to remember all the little things about them - the way they smelled, talked and their daily habits 

also keeps their personal items in a closed box on the  shelf, so that she’ll be able to remember all those details, even years later 

she’s secretly afraid that, after some time passes, she won’t be able to conjure up the contours of their face and how they looked, it’s just terrifying 

Basil Hawkins

“Wait for me up there.” 

I think he’d be most at peace with it, out of all those rebels

he might have even predicted it? so that, when his partner confessed, he already knew all about it 

the man may be caught on tenderly caressing their cheek or hair while they’re asleep, telling them all about his plans and goals for the future that he’d normally never reveal, to anyone

he wants them to know just how much trust he puts in them, and that he won’t hold any secrets from them 

also, would want to hear all about their own ambitions and unfulfilled dreams, so that, once they let it all out, they’ll be able to die cleansed, with dignity 

after their death, Hawkins won’t let his goals out of sight, but would secretly wait to join his lover, and try to predict the moment of his own death

Eustass Kid

"What are you talking about? Don’t fucking lie.” 

mostly denial, mixed with pure rage and frustration 

would probably take it all out on his ship’s doctor, and even his lover couldn’t reason with him on this 

all the time that they have left, Kid spends on circling around getting himself hammered and carrying out slaughters, since his blood lust is getting unbearable and he can’t restrict it anymore

it gets even worse when his lover dies, and he gets the news while coming back to the ship while drunk out of his mind 

the regret would be literally eating him alive, but it’s his rage that won’t let him lose himself in the sorrows 

his idea of making it up for his partner is becoming as strong as possible and getting the title of the Pirate King 

after their death, he won’t recall the times they’ve spent together much, since he doesn’t want to weaken himself, and he’s aware that it can bring him down to rock bottom 

but, during the nights, he does it nonetheless, he’s not able to stop and, what’s worse, forgive himself, even in a million years 

Killer 

“There must be something that I can do.” 

he wants to help, he wants to cure them, to prevent it somehow, or at least drag it out in time for as long as possible 

their alone moments would be filled with anxiety and pure sorrow, at least until Killer realizes that’s not how he wants to spend their last moments 

he starts to talk, a lot, and envelops them with his arms whenever they’re together, breathing in their scent and trying to imprint it in his memories

above all, the man wants them to pass away with dignity and in his embrace, doesn’t matter how hard it’ll be for him, their comfort is the number one priority 

i don’t think he’d seek for any other partners after their death, it feels like a wrong thing to do for him

Apoo

“I know what to do.”

acts like he indeed has it under complete control, to give his partner the feeling of safety

would want them to cherish and have fun in every moment - whatever they like, he’s there to supply them with his music, since it’s the most heartfelt thing he can give them 

the man hides his sorrow very well, and directs his focus towards his lover, and his lover only

also makes sure they’ve seen all, or most of what there in the world to see - he can’t imagine dying without having the sense of fulfillment 

Apoo would prefer them to pass away in his arms, listening to his farewell song and staring off at the ocean’s horizon, because that’s what he’d like to see in his last moments 

Capone Bege

“I’ll take care of our child, my dear.”

if his dearest wife ever died, the man would be devastated, going through all of the stages of sorrow, and then mourning 

meaning, he’d eventually move on and try to raise their kid as well as he can, while conjuring up the memory of his wife as often as possible 

when watching her slowly passing away, he makes sure they spend their moments together, as a family, and he tries to bury his anger and frustration deeply, so that she won’t have anything to be upset with 

he’s a tender man, he wouldn’t hide his tears in front of his child, he wants them to see how important his wife was, and how cruel life can turn out to be sometimes 

Urouge

“What am I supposed to do when you’re gone?” 

he strongly believes in fate, but this would be the kind of situation when he desperately tries to avoid/change it, seeking out for a cure 

upon failing, the man blames himself the most, not even bothering to hide his tears while spending the last moments holding his partner in his arms 

he wants to know all about their unfulfilled dreams, goals and aims in life, so that maybe, one day, he’d be able to turn them into reality, in their memory 

Urouge also keeps all their personal things in his room, getting sentimental whenever his eyes land on one of those 

would eventually move on, and only find a new love if fate brings it to him, he doesn’t look for one on his own 

[arodrwho]

rules: answer 30 questions and tag 20 blogs you would like to get to know better.

was tagged by @chromalogue​ (thank!!)

1. nicknames: the ro friend calls me ace, little sister 1 calls me dork, and and little sister 2 goes back and forth between “face,” “faish,” and “fishy” bc she adorably can’t pronounce my name proper (which tbh no kids ever rly can)

2. gender: mostly a girl, sometimes more, sometimes less

3. star sign: virgo

4. height: 5′1

5. time: 11:10pm

6. birthday: sept. 3

7. favorite bands: ehhhhhh i don’t ? rly listen to bands a whole lot uh. poets of the fall is nice, and fun., and nickelback, and ? others

8. favorite solo artists: uhhhh well tracy chapman’s always gonna be up there, fond of amos lee too, and p!nk, and julia nunes, & ?? others again

9. song stuck in my head: “i’ve got a dream” from tangled and “pizza” by julia nunes have both drifted through a couple times while writing this, also “when the sun goes down” from in the heights

10. last movie i watched: the incredibles!!

11. last show i watched: uhhhh i just watched the latest supergirl ep, but like fuck that bc the whole...nazi crap they’re pulling. soooo let’s talk the last show i watched in the marathon sense, which is leverage. love me some leverage

12. when did i create my blog: 2013

13. what do i post: if we’re talking original posts then complaining mostly? but if we’re talking reblogs then dr who stuff (+bonus leverage and fringe)

14. last thing i googled: “in california if you’re on your parents’ insurance can they tell what doctor’s visits you’ve had”. (answer: surprisingly not always! under certain circumstances u get privacy)

15. do i have any other blogs: yyyyyyep. i’ve got the doomblog over @aroacenbdrwhoquotes, and i’ve got a writing blog i never use @greencomposition, anD i’ve also got a sort of....personal sideblog for junk i don’t want followers i know irl to see (which is in theory give-out-able on request but in practice [vague shrug])

16. do i get asks: ehhh rarely

17. why i chose my url: because i’m the most sentimental fuck who’s ever lived (read: it’s taken from the title of a picture book my mom bought me the day i was adopted) (it’s” called the tin forest” and it’s a rly good book, w/themes i can’t quite word but feel v strongly about)

18. following: uhhhh 163

19. followers: 458

20. average hours of sleep: mmm bout 8

21. lucky number: 4

22. instruments: the tiniest possible amount of violin 

23. what I’m wearing: dude jeans, college t-shirt i got for free, mismatch socks one of which has lil sheeps on it and says “black sheep of the family” which is.....ironic & mildly hilarious, considering. aND also a v soft hoodie w/3 whole avengers on it (hulk, thor, & iron man)

24. dream job: writer. pls let me make the words go for dollars

25. dream trip: uhhhh well, if we take “dream” to its extreme, then i’d say a trip Anywhere in the tardis (except somewhere there’s plague, bc uhhhhh no thx)

26. favourite food: [samwise gamgee voice] PO-TA-TOES. boil ‘em, mash ‘em, stick ‘em in a stew

27. nationality: american, unfortunately

28: favourite song right now: uhhhhhh idk that i have a favorite song rn tbh. am not as wild into music as other folks. like i like it but i also....disengage from it for long periods of time, sorta forget it’s a thing i can listen to, & am only just slipping back into it after one of those periods, so. i got nothin

29. last book I read: uhhhh i read some of the brief wondrous life of oscar wao for class? but non-class-wise, i’m in the middle of rereading good omens

30. top three fictional universes: dr who ofc, and i wanna say fringe and leverage bc those are the shows i’m most into rn buuuuut there is also the fact that hp owns my entire damn soul, and that the young wizards universe is cool as Heck. so...gonna have to actually say dr who, hp, and yw. yeah (wAIT but star wars??? can i have four bc if i can then also star wars)

friiiiick if i’m tagging 20 people lmao but i’ll do a few i guess? @killuabs @keepthemacramesecret @fangoriousfae @autisticpadfoot and ??? whoever else the heck wants to do this, consider urself tagged