#sometimes I angst

[onomatapeanut]

Stranger

/strayn-jr/

noun. A person whom one does not know or with whom one is not familiar.

[imfinereallyy]

you can pry happy endings from my cold-dead hands. It can be the most heart stopping, gut wrenching fic that has every existed and I will read every drop of it if I get my happy ending. I have had enough painful endings in real life, give me happy in my fantasy world. It can be at the last second, it can be a single sentence, even a single word. Give me all the angst and hurt in the world for 500,000 words, but please give me the comfort I need in the ending. please and thank you.

[nerdy-hyperfixations]

“Pain is hilarious!”

C’mon guys he had to learn that his eye regenerates somehow!

So fun fact! You know that thing people, perhaps parents tell you? That if you smile it tricks your brain into being happy? Well don’t do that in traumatic moments! Because if you do, your brain mixes wires on how to process shit and when you’re under mental turmoil you might start laughing maniacally! I may or may not know from experience!!! 😃

[kathaynesart]

A sketch of Replica Leo immediately after his EPF Interview in this scene, but before being reunited with his brothers here. I hope to dive more into the fallout of such a defining moment in Leo's young life and how it would go on to affect him once I get my Patreon up. In the meantime. Enjoy the little angsty sneak peek.

[rosekillerbf]

"Sirius' patronus is padfoot." no no you are wrong actually.

Sirius' patronus is a small, slender cat. It's fussy and pretends to scratch him every so often. The cat looks like it's partway between being a kitten and a fully grown cat. Sirius will never know that his patronus has a counterpart.

Regulus will know.

[acid-ixx]

mild spoilers for chapter six for my series again &. again, but i really feel the need to ramble about this, and i'd love to hear anybody's opinion on this hehe.

as i write outline chapter six (and write for chapter five), i'd like to say i couldn't wait to write the reader's face reveal in bruce's perspective. and it's not just angst, for me, this plays a very pivotal turn for the series— because bruce will spiral to insanity.

to never once see a single portrait of your second youngest child, whose presence has long been erased from the manor, not a single image, nor trace of you is sickening to the heart, even if he scours through the internet day and night for a single memoir of you, nothing— but to find your portrait in alfred's living quarters and seeing you for the first time in forever? graduating a milestone no less?

god, he's in for a ride just analyzing every aspect of your physical appearance.

the color of your eyes, the shape of your nose, the quip of your mouth, the fat in your cheeks; even the length of your lashes! god, does he brand it into the deepest parts of his mind to never forget you anymore. his pearl, his treasure.

the longer he stares, the more he notices and gazes even more, obsessive as he stands lonesome in the room with every bone in his body locking up, his eyes unable to look away from the portrait that showcases his baby child.

and there, there it is that he concludes a detail so small it's unrecognizable for someone who's seen it for his entire life; yet it's all the same triggered deranged emotions deep within him.

— you don't just share him and your mother's traits, no, your smile is also reminiscent of his mother's.

martha wayne, who'd died in his arms, laying in a pool of her blood with a bullet grazed deep inside her body. his loving mother, who caressed his face whenever he'd cry from his nightmares, who'd shown him motherly love that until now he still craves.

she died with her pearl necklace that once decorated her porcelain neck spilling to the ground and stained with crimson.

you wore pearl earrings on your graduation.

the thought alone is enough for him to just snap.

this? this is the child that he's been neglecting far too long? who shares the same, loving expression of his mother's? his child? not even a single memory could be conjured with you but fantasies now do. if your happiest moments were within the picture frame that he holds with shivering fingers at present; could your smile be any wider if you'd be with him?

how come he never once noticed? why is bruce always destined to fail left and right? why, just why is he brimming with jealousy for all the people who must've seen your smile before him, and contempt for himself that he was never there to pick you up from the police station beforehand?

bruce isn't a heckler for favoritism, but a darker part of him is motivated to take you away from wherever you are, and to never let anybody else witness his beautiful, little treasure.

he's gotham's knight, first and foremost. but he's a father, too, with goals to protect his children just like a father should.

and the things he'd do for you, his child, now? anything.

if it means he has to see that smile, then he'll turn the world upside-down.

he has to protect your smile.

[that-nerd-who-writes-fanfiction]

Arthur: I want to wake up to you every day for the rest of our lives.

Merlin: I wake up at sunrise.

Arthur: …

Arthur: I want to see you at a reasonable time every morning for the rest of our lives.

Merlin: I could always laze in bed till you wake up.

Arthur, knowing that will more than likely mean waking up to Merlin playing with his hair every morning: Perfect. Yes. Do that.

[fumifooms]

Homegrown

Thistle and Delgal - Dungeon Meshi, Ryoko Kui

^ Fernando Pessoa / Killing Flies, Michael Dickman / A Brother Named Gethsemane, Natalie Diaz / Antigonick, Anne Carson v Oats We Sow, Gregory and the Hawk

[lil-vibes]

Day 1: You are who you eat

/Next

(heres the prompt list!)

bonus:

[obsessedwithstarwars]

Question for the DP fandom:

Do you think Danny’s hair turns white when it falls out? It’s technically dead cells anyway but when it naturally falls off his head, do you think it turns white? Because I think it would be hilarious if his hairbrush just has white hair, no black strands whatsoever, and his significant other thought the worst until they know his secret.

[legendary-cookies]

TW: Blood

So much for that, huh

[sweeetcheeese]

warning: winter spirits are very ticklish and will become violent when provoked.

[sentientsliotar]

So we’re all in agreement that Fizzmodeus is Stolitz without the pain?

Like ok yes there is pain-

But these two have heard of a magical thing called ✨communication✨

UNLIKE SOME PEOPLE

Which leads to shit like this

TALK TO EACH OTHER DAMMIT

[twilightkitkat]

Almost everyone agrees that both sides of Poolverine have unhealthy attachment styles. A lot of people portray this as Logan having an avoidant attachment style and Wade having an anxious attachment style. But in reality, I think it'd be swapped.

Logan has all of the surface-level factors that make him easy to write off as avoidant: he's gruff, masculine, and has a habit of leaving without much forewarning. I feel like the largest factor that contributes to this portrayal of him is how he's closed-off and wary of people, and how despite getting closer to the X-men he still leaves the second he has a reason to. (And oftentimes, that reason is exploring his past or just needing to get away.)

But the reason he's leaving isn't because he wants to. It's because he feels like has to.

Logan acts like he doesn't care, but he does. And it's so painfully obvious. The second anyone he cares about is in danger, he rushes off to save them even if it goes against orders. His "leaving" isn't him running away from the people he cares about, but running toward them. And the other times, he's trying to uncover his past. Not because he wants to distance himself from the people he loves, but because he needs to know that he doesn't endanger them or put them at risk. So that he can be better for them.

He feels like the only way to keep the people he loves close is to not put everything out in the open. While he comes off as cocky and guarded and gruff, in reality, he's insecure and paranoid that people will leave him. He's terrified of loss, so he tries to prevent it by only showing people the parts of his personality that are "acceptable." The Wolverine can be animalistic and rough, but if he's soft and clingy then people will push him away.

The second he gets a crumb of affection, he clings to it desperately. He sees Jean's attraction to him and relentlessly flirts with her and tries to show off. If she told him no or turned him down point-blank, he would stop. But she only gives weak resistance (the type you give "for show") and so he keeps pushing. He puts himself in harm's way for her and protects her and supports her because he loves her, even if she only gives him a little back.

A scene where this is incredibly obvious is when Jean tells him that girls only flirt with the bad boy, they don't take him home. They marry the good guy. His response? He told her that he could be the good guy. That if she just gave him the chance, he'd change himself for her just to hold her close. He's desperate for her to finally see him and tries to plead his case.

If he were avoidant, he wouldn't lean in so hard to anyone who gives him any semblance of care or affection. Instead, as soon as someone is kind to him, he devotes himself to them. Gives away as much of himself as he can for their sake. He tries to be as close to them as he physically can, but it's hard. It's hard when nobody reciprocates. When he's met with awkwardness and discomfort the second he asks for more.

(He just wanted someone to belong to. A steady home. The second someone opens their door for him, he belongs to them. Until they get tired and kick him back out again. Until they just leave food scraps by the door and expect it to be enough.)

His natural instinct is to cling to someone as hard as he can. To stay on the lifeboat even as it sinks, even as his head is submerged underwater, until he physically can't anymore. But after so many times of trying to stay afloat on debris, he's reluctant to get into the water again.

And yet, the second Wade calls out to him and asks him to stay, he does. There's no room for hesitation. Not when someone finally wanted him.

Whenever Logan was offered a home, he always stayed as long as he could. And he learned that people normally took this as him overstaying his welcome. So he leaves not because he wants to, but for their sake. To not be a burden. Because that's what's expected.

But as soon as someone gives an indication otherwise, genuinely wants him, he holds them so closely he can hear their heartbeat. He's anxious that they'll leave him, so desperately tries to show that he's worth keeping. He'll do anything they ask. He'll push as far as they'll let him, curl up as close to them as they allow, and stay there.

Wade, on the other hand, is more avoidant. It's easy to write him off as anxious and affectionate: he's cheerful, flirty, and wears his surface-level emotions proudly. He isn't afraid to claim that he has a family, and one of his main motivations is his long-term relationship with Vanessa. He's been explicitly shown to be scared to lose the people he loves, and he coped horribly with the loss of his girlfriend.

However, attachment styles aren't about what you feel. They're about how you react to it.

Wade does care, because of course he does. He cares so much that it's painful. But how does he act on the love he feels? By distancing himself from others.

Wade is good at flirting. He's good at joking and being there when times are easy. But he's always had a habit of hiding his deeper emotions, even from the people closest to him. He doesn't let them know about his problems until it's too late. He intentionally hides from them and doesn't let them get involved in his life because he fears hurting them. It's a compulsion to keep them safe and happy and to protect himself and his own feelings.

After breaking free from Francis after unlocking his mutation, what does he do? He avoids Vanessa for years, terrified of how she'll react to this new version of him now that he looks disfigured. He never lets anyone too close to his true feelings, hiding behind his suit and mask. His first reaction when there's conflict that could result in issues isn't to stay and try to work through it, but to leave. Before they can get hurt. (Before they can hurt him.)

This is also shown at the start of the Deadpool & Wolverine movie. The overarching issue in Wade's life is that he feels empty and like he has no real purpose. Like he doesn't matter. Instead of using his relationships as support and sticking with them, he pulls back. He doesn't open up to Vanessa which results in their eventual break-up. He acts like he's perfectly content with his life to Peter and Al even though that's clearly not the case.

His first instinct was to run away. From his feelings, from difficult talks, from the people he loved. He tried to suppress his emotions and avoid intimate or serious conversations. He feels uncomfortable with the idea of being vulnerable with someone. He knows how to be alone. It's easy. Familiar. It's what he returns to the second he feels threatened.

However, as a pair, Wade and Logan balance each other out. Wade can finally feel comfortable being more open because Logan understands the pain of loss and suffering and immortality. Logan finally has someone who doesn't judge him for what he's done and who lets him be himself and still wants him.

When Logan initially was more closed-off, Wade felt comfortable pushing. When Wade tried to pull away because of his guilt, Logan yanked him back. When Logan was about to walk away, Wade called after him. Offered him a home. Logan answered.

Logan would latch onto Wade like a cat with separation anxiety. He'd give all he has to Wade in return for finally being treated like a person. And this would make Wade realize that he doesn't have to run away. He doesn't have to pull back when Logan can protect himself and wants to stay with him. Despite his mangled appearance and crude personality and shitty morality.

Wade gets used to Logan's presence. To finally having someone who's an equal. (Who won't hurt him. Who can't die. Who won't become overwhelmed because he knows what it's like. It's like he can finally breathe knowing that there's someone who's going to be there no matter what.)

Logan feels less anxious when Wade only acts this close to him, when he reassures him that in a multiverse of Wolverines, he's the one Wade would choose. Again and again. He finally feels like he's the exception in a good way. Like he's someone's first choice.

So Logan lets himself relax, and Wade lets himself finally get close to someone. They both let themselves stay and mean it.

[doughliciousfrosting]

Ive been waiting to share this mwahahaha I really like drawing little baby MK I think he's so cute 😭😭 it's hard to believe at some point that MK was tinier than pigsy, pigsys just so short ahahslajdls

[demigods-posts]

thinking of percy going to school as a small child. learning that some of his peers talk to deceased family members in their heads to cope with grief. and deciding to take the time each night to talk to his father. telling him a funny story of how mom laughed so hard, milk came out of her nose. of how he got a near perfect score on his third grade spelling test. of each time he got expelled from school and how much he knew it made mom sad. of how his stepfather is the meanest bully he's ever met. of how he wished the two of them had more time together so they could share s'mores and stories around the campfire. of how much he grieves the father he never had. and thinking of poseidon sitting in his throne atop olympus. tears threatening to fall at the sound of his son's voice. mirroring the grief of a child he never got to raise.