#sometime soon i hope. please
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#10.04.23#3391#sry to announce that i never rly got back to trying to make that website & dont have a thing to show evennow#sometime soon i hope. please#( i havent worked much on the other stuff either . aaaaaah. )
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i got tagged by @ljubitelj-sonca @apfel07 and @itskrejsaitsparty to post the last line i wrote down, although i can see almost everyone disregards the line part and posts a paragraph haha so uhmmmm im also going to ignore the line limit 👍🏻 and since i got tagged by three people ill post three paragraphs bc what are rules anyways
i uhhh im not tagging anyone bc as with most of these things im getting to them very late and i feel like everyone has already been tagged, oopsie
#its three and a half but whatever.#and now I KNOW WHAT THIS LOOKS LIKE. but i still dont like lesbokris is the next thing thats getting posted#i just had a short daydream about it and wrote a scene but its still. i dont think im gonna get very far with it any time soon.#IM JUST SAYING THIS AS A DISCLAIMER OKAY because i keep getting asks about this so please dont get your hopes up too far#uhhhh not sure what tag to use for this??? since so far for snippets ive only ever used the 'holidate spoilers' tag#but obviously this isnt holidate#snippets#idk maybe ill think of a better tag sometime later#bokris#holly holy
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Does anyone have any tips to help stop yourself from comparing your artwork to others, or equating your value as an artist with likes and reblogs?
I've struggled with this for a while and it's getting old, I don't know how to just shrug it off. Any genuine advice would be nice
#its just bygging me bc i know rationally they dont matter i knoe they dont#but i still feel it in my bones that im not good enough because my work doesnt circulate on platforms#i paint for fun and then i post and i get these feelings and theyre so goddamn annoying#i know to just keep posting anyway and try to enjoy the ride but my Depression Brain is such an asshole#i wish it would be quiet#i never used to feel this way either until likes and reposts/reblogs became so integral to social media#on top of needing commissions to get by while looking for work and attending school soon#idk maybe this is just a vent and ik no one can Fix it that simply#i guess im just speaking 2 the void rn and maybe others feel the same#*bugging#and i really am so grateful just to know anyone likes it or comments on it and reading feedback really really means so much#but i feel like unless im pumping out specific fandom stuff that doesnt really happen#but the negative thoughts and feelings can b rly strong sometimes and im just tired#im sure this is a depression thing too#hoping i can get into therapy thru school but it depends on finances as everything else in this world does 🫠#ill keep going tho#and please if you are someone who does comment or reblog and say something about the work please do not ever stop#it means so much to me and others im positive it does#i see you and i appreciate you so so much#thank you and thank you to anyone who reads or comments some ideas
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the quality of my art fluctuates wildly between each post. it's just a perk you get when you follow me. no i will not apologise
#i liken my art skills to a cat. has its own agency and comes and goes as it pleases#i'm just the owner of the cat occasionally shaking a bag of treats from the window and hoping it comes back soon#sometimes the cat falls asleep in my lap for a while so i can actually make lots of art
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another weekend, another job rejection!
#and now no more positions are open to apply to! for now at least. some more will probably drop soon. fuck i hope so.#love just. being fucking unable to even make it into the interview phase for my extraordinarily lofty career goal#Of Working In A Fucking Library#just. so thrilled.#kazoo noises#anyway tomorrow morning i have to find a time to talk to my rabbis bc if i dont figure shit out i have to pick between becoming jewish or#graduating on time and i have fucking NO ONE i can talk to this about and ive used up like all of my good will in all of my personal#relationships already and i am So Fucking Sick of feeling mean and petty and evil all the time but my options are either fucking smile and#be noticeably fake optimistic when i get called on my bullshit or burn like all three of my last remaining bridges#i just dont see why i cant even make it to interviews. like i can accept not being the right fit or whatever. but like. it really kinda is#everyone but me whos employed by now.#man. like listen. its not my professors fault. i get that i've got her in a bad position.#but she said ''sometimes we have to pick between sources of joy'' like MAN--#do NOT speak to me about that. absolutely the FUCK not.#you! are employed and have been in this field for over a decade and i work in a grocery store with no sign of luck changing.#i need to be in this section bc 1) im not fucking doing academia with a gun pulled on me#2) i need to actually get some kind of professional experience since its clear i can't actually get a job on merit so i guess i will pay to#go further into debt#anyway no one is around to talk to me about this and i hate bitching to my friends about how fucking hopeless i feel all the fucking time s#everyone please look away from my diary posting and think of me as sexy and fun and bubbly <3333#like. its literally no ones fault so i should not be this fucking resentful.#and yet.#yeah im probably not getting classed as a good person for another several years. shame. ive always wanted to be good.#library travails
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oh man no wonder i'm missing my little guys recently. we haven't seen kaeya in almost a year
#personal stuff#delete later#a month from now marks one year since his hangout....#head in hands.... kaeya come back i miss you#yes i Know he has a hangout i can replay at any time that also has his brother in it. not the same#diluc showed up back in march with his normalguysona and kaeya sent a letter but it's just not the same...#i miss the ragbros insanity that 2.8 and 3.1 inflicted upon me. i miss bouncing off the walls thinking about them and their new lore#can they come back and do something that makes me relive that sometime soon. please. for me#not sure who's going to be in the summer event this year. probably not going to be either of them but can it be Someone i care abt#for the most part they have been? like 1.6 was THE found family slash siblings vacation#2.8 was my girlie fischl and also hidden strife#then 3.8 was kaeya and klee and collei and kokomi#come on let's keep up this energy. this will be THE mondstadt update TRUST#like come onn venti and lisa both told us to come back to mondstadt before setting off for somewhere new......#like at this point i have very little hope for mondstadt character story quest 2. i used to hope for it w every update but now it's like#who fucking knows. we'll wait until snezhnaya i guess. that's when venti and diluc will probably be relevant again#jean miiight get a second one after natlan depending on what happens to varka's expedition? since her mom is there i think#manifesting a second razor quest then too. we know what the rifthounds are now + varka coming back would be a good setup#and klee might get one whenever we meet alice. i have my thoughts but idk when Exactly that'll be#but lisa's thing probably won't be relevant for a while either considering its connection to the abyss order#and kaeya and albedo... yeah.#but like. i'd love to see amber go to liyue and find her grandpa or something :(#and like. fuck it i would love to see a second xiangling quest too.
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The kittens love hide and seek!
They also got the vaccinations today, and are over one kilo which means it's snip snip time next week ✂️
And also two of them might already have a home! One of my colleagues is coming over to meet them and wants to adopt a pair.
#Koni's kittens#Foster kittens#Now I hope to get an answer on the mum question sometime from the org please#And we'll see if the other two also get a home soon
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i keep habitually opening my email on the off chance i have new ao3 commints even tho it's been several weeks since i uploaded anything & then. remembering.
#ao3#life hack though. if you never delete any of your emails then you still have your whole constellation of nice ao3 feedback#corkboard-scattered thru there. gotta compile a new document of nice things people have said that make me cry#please know if u have ever left a fic comment u make me warm inside.#sometimes people will be like 'ok it's embarrassing for me to comment weeks after this was uploaded when i shoulda read it right away but-'#NO IT'S NOT YOU'RE SO NICE TO ME. FIC EXISTS TO PERUSE IN UR LEISURE TIME AND COMMENTS WEEKS IN THE FUTURE EXTEND MY LIFESPAN#if you comment weeks after i upload something u have a pretty good chance of catching me mid-flare which is when i need the kindness and#validation the most. so.#anyway. miss u babygirl hope ur back soon god bless our troops (the ao3 volunteers)
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Hi.. how many to do prompts do you currently have in your inbox? I don’t want to flood you with more if there is already too much
Hi anon ❤️
Tbh, I don't have that many prompts in my askbox at the moment, so send all the ideas you wish to see written down and I'll gladly give it a try!
If you're interested (and if you're the one who submitted it, your wait is nearly over) tomorrow I'll post a cute Jily drabble, follow up of Training Wheels, and I plan to share my entry for Winter in June (the challenge @jilychallenge issued for this month) on Tuesday or Wednesday, but it all depends on how heavy the workload at my job is this week.
If you're not here for something Jily related, just know I'm brewing up some Wolfstar and a Sirius x Marlene x Remus drabble, meanwhile if you follow me because of ACOTAR, I' working on a multichapter for @gwynweekofficial I wish I'll like enough to actually submit
#sorry anon if i took advantage of your ask to inform everyone of my schedule#i just want you all to know i'm onto something#sometimes i'm just too insecure to share it as soon as it's finished#but you can ALWAYS hit me up with new ideas#they inspire me to work even harder#my english may not be the best and my beta reader is not the fastest reader#but i hope you can still feel my commitment#a big thank you must go to the jily and wolfstar fandom for being so supportive#blackinnon folks i haven't forgotten about you i'm just waiting for the next round of blackinnon fest#to my acotar mutuals: please don't unfollow me#i'm still here and soon you'll have BIG news
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you know, i like this
i always think it would be nice to see more of this in romance! it wasn't twu wuv, actually, and it's not like i'll "never get over him" (perhaps i am simply too aromantic for this shit but god WHY PEACH WHY). i liked him, and it wasn't that deep, and now i'm moving on
i mean
same. i don't buy it. i just think it's neat
#bake me please the series#yeah sometimes you have Some Feelings and they seem SUPER big and important#but then you have a snack and a beverage and take a long nap and you feel better actually#speedy recovery guy! hope someone sexy and awesome with a massive [redacted] sweeps you off your feet real soon!#also is it just me or did peach get a personality transplant this episode??#can't even put my finger on what it is but he just seemed. different?#anyway. that sure was a tv show i watched
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#a post thats in the tags so I don't take up space. Sorry for not being as active the last few days. got another thing piled onto the#'Kaden can't stop having things wrong with their body' So I'm dealing with bs. This one hit suddenly and I spent the day trying to get#into walk in clinics (and failed) they either weren't open or they were already filled for the day.#hoping I can get in sometime tomorrow and if not then its back to urgent care which is really something I'd not do as the wait times#are astronomically long. but if I have too I have too.#If I ever feel a little better I'll be here to bombard you with content and rb your stuff. please keep tagging me. i won't get to it#straight away but usually when I see I'm tagged I will rb it into my drafts so they don't get lost 💜#I feel like I haven't been existing lately irl and its really got me at an extremely low mood point.#sleep pain sleep pain eat/drink sleep pain repeat the cycle and I'm just so mentally exhausted.#I love you all /pl and I hope I can start being a little more cheery soon and I'm sorry a couple of my posts havent been. im just having a#real rough go of it rn#cosmic chatter
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WIP DAY.
tagged by @girlbosselrond @morvaris @aartyom @risingsh0t @phillipsgraves @leviiackrman @indorilnerevarine & @denerims over the past month! sorry it's taken me so long to get to anything at all, i'm sure you guys have heard me address it enough, but thank you all so much for continuing to tag me in things while i've been inactive ♡
tagging @aelyosos @brujah @calenhads @florbelles @jendoe @lightwardens @liurnia @nokstella @nuclearstorms @shadowsofrose @shellibisshe @steelport @swordcoasts @wrymbloods @voerman & all of those who tagged me again cause i'm so behind + anyone else who'd like to share anything they're working on, not just writing! ♡
i haven't written anything since the last wip game i did, but i started trying to put diana's timeline together at the start of january, so i mean... i'll show that instead. as you can see, fatigue hasn't let me do much with it even though i've got all of her timeline already done and strewn about all over the place.
started with 1995 onwards cause it was originally going to be an ewskers timeline situation, but then wanted to include all of her backstory so i went back to the start and still have the late 80s and early 90s to get through before then, but yeah :]
it's going to include like all little moments i've thought of between the ewskers just for me and placing them on the timeline, so you can imagine how long this is going to get if i have to go to 2021 for village... like just 1996-1998 is going to be so much... she's very special to me if you couldn't tell already lmaoo
never sharing this though, it's just for me, and like will help for when i do her timeline page (more in-depth version of what's on her oc page) to just run through canon events and brief descriptions and whatnot. you understand.
everything is blurred out besides 1995 ewskers momence and the years, just cause like idk her i feel weird sharing her in-depth backstory unless it's in dms or something, just cause there's lots going on there and yeah. things. idk
i also made a carrd for twt if you wanna have a look at that :] there's some cheeky subtle things with the two resi items i used as pics hehe
actually, you know what, i'll give a lil bit from where i left of with that rewrite anyways, even though it's been months since i wrote it. but why not
Wesker left a fleeting kiss behind her ear then reached around her and hooked his fingers beneath her coat, prompting Diana to glance back at him. But all he did was gently pull it from her shoulders. She watched him from out of the corner of her eye as he hung it up on the rack by the door, his movements careful and almost calculated, until he turned back towards her, and the warmth of his body returned once more. He pressed up against her side this time, as opposed to her back, and one of his hands found a home on her waist. The way the arm it belonged to was resting firmly against her as he began leading her towards the kitchen was comforting, secure, yet unmistakably possessive. And she revelled in it. He had quite the knack for handling her just the way she wanted.
#tag games.#keep going to do picrews and just zoning out 😭 i'm so behind on literally everything but it's fine it's okay (lying)#i'm having a day and a half even though i woke up feeling okay but oh well. my last month has just been like watching videos during the day#or playing games when i have a bit more energy but like i can't do anything that requires me to actually read or write things like words#are just not computing in my brain at the moment but it's okay like i'm just exhausted and hoping soon i can get back to writing because i#still have over 30 wips going lmao but yeah it's been a time a half with lots of appointments and seeing specialists again and trying to#sort things out. i've been more active on twitter which i've mentioned before but it's just because like it's easier for me to sort of just#like and rt things and not having to do my organisation tags and things like i know that sounds so just small and simple but that's how#i've been lately like to my brain rn that seems like a really big task. so i just keep coming on here randomly for a few minutes then#disappearing so i'm sorry that i've definitely missed so much and i haven't been around to just show my appreciation and love to your#creations!! also just everything that happened in december and then a bit at the start of january too like i'm just a lil paranoid about#being on here honestly so i'm trying to get back to it and be okay with posting again and i'm going to make a promise to myself to actually#filter more tags i think? just to help me with like not exposing myself to things that do make me feel uncomfortable in any way!! i'm#rambling now but sorry sometimes i just need to lmaooo idk but yes so cute lil subtle things from my carrd i wanna talk about cause why not#i didn't have to change the blue herb from re0 besides making it brighter because it's already teal toned which is so sexy but i shifted#the hue on the spade key like SLIGHTLY like it was so little. but anyways. i use this emoji ✨ on my twitter name and yes cause sparkles but#also. three stars. the s.t.a.r.s. badge and logo :] then blue herb because i will have no poison in my safe space!!!! take a blue herb or#leave please!! only good vibes and safe space here!! spade key because i'm ace <3 i was going to include the diamond one in there as well#because am demiro and like those are the symbols in the community. ace of spades for ace. diamond for demis (both orientations)#but wasn't sure how to weave the pink through the rest of the carrd even though cyan and pink together is so pretty omg
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i can do math.
eddie + buck= bi4bi
#eddie diaz#evan buckley#buddie#buck x eddie#911 fox#911 on fox#911 abc#911 on abc#eddie and buck are bi af#idc what this fandom says#bisexual eddie superiority#anyway also please end the show sometime soon#i hope there’s a plán to end it#maybe with a madney wedding#you see bathena all happy#they are both retired and all they do is travel fuck and be in love#bobby is finally the househusband he wants to be#henren finally have more kids and chaos in their house#they’ll have a hoard of children#they’ll never in their lifetime make buddie canon#but eddie and buck and chris attend the wedding together#and it’s implied subtle that buddie are together#buck and eddie could be sharing looks and chris could be like#ew we’re in public dont be gross now be gross when you’re at home and i’m not there#or something like that#and then the fire fam are all together after the wedding and reception is done and it’s this big group hug scenario#hen and chim are captains but one is captain of the 118 and the other is captain at a different station#idk i feel like this show should end before it’s cancelled for good#op
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I know I’ve said this before, but I am begging to know who Schneeball is
Oh and, I guess Twist Roll too
#I don’t know why but I just really want her#I hope we get her update sometime soon#please#cookie run#cookie run ovenbreak#tbd#schneeball cookie#twist roll cookie#random stuff
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Hiiii! So I can't thank my favourite authors monetarily BUT I can drop by and anonymously give them lots of love. Thank you SO much for your awesome fics. Just re-read 'in the middle of the night' and busy reading 'something tender and uninhibited' now and I wanted to say I love you! <3 <3 <3 I just melt for your sweet, soft girl Lena.
sorry for taking eons to answer but hi hey thank you guys so much!!! it's really heartwarming, to see you take some time of your day to send something kind & sweet. every comment means a lot to me & i appreciate you all 😭
#been going through a massive creative block but i feel myself getting out of it fully soon i hope!!#if anyone's sent me smth fic related & i've not answered there's a high chance i've read it but it was ate up; tumblr is super clunky for m#on desktop & mobile my ask box shows diff asks. like idk if it's just me or it's happening to other ppl as well but#there are asks i see on desktop that aren't on mob#& some asks also?? disappear sometimes? i see them & then days/weeks later when i go to my inbox to answer they're gone 🤨#anyways once more; thank you guys!!!!#really bad at expressing my gratitude please know i treasure all your words i k*ss u all tenderly on the forehead 💕💕💕💕#hope you guys are having a lovely day!!!#asks
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Waaahhh i just finished queens of mystery and both seasons were so good and fun!!!
My current thoughts in no particular order:
W H A T is going on with The Raven and Eleanor Stone
Mattie is such a cute nickname for Matilda
Matilda is very cute and i love her blouses (also how didn't i notice that she was played by one actress in season 1 and by another in season 2??)
I figured out a clue and "solved the murders" in Smoke & Mirrors !!!
Not a big fan of Daniel, why did he stay together with his fiancee all that time (and was implied to be miserable). Like they even went on a break at the end of season 1 but were back together in season 2 even though Daniel looked like he'd rather die than be with/marry his fiancee??
Not Matilda having a crush on a suspect who turns out to be the murderer 🤡
The inspector being so flipping awkward, i love it. Btw what is his job? Like Matilda is solving all the murders and Terry is helping Matilda in all kinds of ways and he is just standing around and giving orders??? (Edit: have to give credit where it is due he did interview that one suspect that one time)
Also everytime it goes like "what the inspector wanted to say at this moment...." and then "what he actually said, was..." great comedy
What is the story between Cat and Annie. Does Matilda even know Annie exist? Did Cat raise Annie herself? Where is Annie now?
Beth, Cat and Jane snooping around and collecting evidence for Matilda the whole time (them drinking tea with one of the suspects lol)
So many ridiculous characters
All of Matilda's aunts being suspects at least once
Terry and his mum
Who tf is that creepy guy who we only see in dark silhouettes with the cigarette??
Matilda's got such a cool car
How does Jane Stone's bookstore make money to stay open?
Nancy Carroll being in the first episode 🥰 (there was no felicia scream though 😔)
Cat Stone being in a band and becoming girlfriends with the lead singer <3
what kind of bitch jerk leaves jane stone at the altar???
Beth looks like she gives such great hugs
The fact that Jane Stone can do and learn almost anything but can't cook to save her life
How big is Wildemarsh?? I mean they go everywhere by car but it is seemingly all one quaint village?
#queens of murder#queens of murder spoilers#in love with the stone family#matilda please you have not a good taste in men * looking at you mr engaged and mr murderer *#(george is okay i think but idk how soon he went from dating to proposing so he isn't safe)#what cool aunts!!#really hoping for a season 3 sometime in the future#anyways#isa's watching
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