#something-something-Yerkes-Dodson-curve-something-something

[soysaucevictim]

I'm just thinking abt the HPA axis some more again. It's basically the hormonal cascade/sequence that makes you produce more stress hormones like adrenaline and cortisol. (Stands for hypothalamus-pituitary-adrenal.)

Chronic stress often worsens when you're just swimming in those hormones, unable to tamp 'em down or direct them somewhere useful/fun.

One reason why exercise is very helpful there is like...

Imagine you're a car, the brake peddle is jank. You're in a hurry and you have no idea where the fuck you're going. That's kinda the runaway feeling of it. All you feel you can do is lead foot the gas pedal (sympathetic nervous system.)

Management skills/tools (like exercise) helps to fix your brake pedal (parasympathetic nervous system) and slow shit down and use just enough gas to get you from point A to B. Finding that steady/appropriate Goldilocks zone is a more efficient way to burn through those hormones and get back to equilibrium (or at least get as close to that as feasible).

[snifflebunny21]

My teacher was just talking about "the like graph thing that shows healthy amounts of anxiety" and all I could think of was:

(He couldn't remember the exact name so I said "Yerkes Dodson?" and he said "YES!" so. I'm glad he didn't ask how I knew it.)

[transfemlogan]

to add to the 'ducking out' saga: i always saw virgil 'ducking out' as an extended hypothetical. to me, it's like when logan brings up the importance / prominence of lying / deceit's role in the end of 'can lying be good'. i don't remember the full quote, but it was something like 'everyone lies a lot all the time and it's almost impossible to avoid.'

ANYWAY virgil ducking out was like .. a thought experiment i guess? basically i imagine logan bringing out than yerkes-dodson curve, going 'can you imagine what would happen with no anxiety at all?' and boom bam thomas starts imaging the scenario. it's less of a 'oh that literally happened to c!thomas' and more of an in-universe 'it was all a dream.' like with that 'five years later' video where he went 'wouldn't it be crazy if this happened .. cut to it happening'

which to be clear. 'it was all a dream' is not good writing! it still sucks! but it's how i justify it to myself. otherwise it makes no fucking sense man

OK THAT ... THATS A COOL THEORY I LIKE THAT

Thomas was like "oh my god it WOULD be bad if i didnt have anxiety!" & then decided 2 accept him /J

[logically-asexual]

im so annoyed about this whole remus and logan thing i can’t stop thinking about it. so a long ramble under the cut.

i finally am being able to put into words what bothers me about logan’s character development, particularly him vs the dark sides.

first of all, virgil. virgil had a whole season for his development that was kind of natural and credible. he is a nuisance in different ways, thomas recognizes he has anxiety and looks for ways to cope, which logan learns to bring up later, then virgil keeps causing trouble but makes some good points sometimes, then thomas decides to accept him for the good he brings and they all manage better. all this happens within episodes that aren’t always about anxiety. they SHOW us how the sides’ perception of him and his character have changed through the stories, instead of lecturing us about it.

with janus they kind of attempted the same thing but with a speedrun of three episodes that crammed everything together with little plot. in fact the plot is just an excuse to make every single step of janus’s developement happen, and this progress with janus is the center of the episodes. at least there is some plot, but its not as natural, we don’t see thomas struggle with him casually, we don’t see logan or patton learning information about how to deal with him. its not how a normal person would go through this. but we do see different stages of his acceptance and we see all the sides learning new things about janus gradually.

but then with remus they just pressed literally everything in one video and all the learning thomas would have to do about him and dealing with him that he did with virgil in an entire year happens in?? 40 minutes? because he (logan) somehow already knew everything and he just had to remind himself (patton and virgil) of it?

that’s how i see the dark sides’ development (?). now logan.

with virgil you could assume logan took note of what Lilly said in that first video, then logan and had thomas research about it and find strategies to later use them when they were necessary. as if Taking on Anxiety was a first step with learner’s wheels and then My Negative Thinking was thomas being able to repeat the process on his own. it makes sense. first someone teaches you and then you do it independently. you can believe there was a learning process with Logan’s help right there, beginning with Logan (and thomas) not knowing something and then researching (between videos), understanding it, to finally accepting it.

after the debate logan was still neutral about virgil, and was pushed to reflect more about his role until he disappeared, to finally come to the realization of why he was necessary, by remembering a small fact he learned while researching strategies (the yerkes dodson curve). that one isnt a streategy, so makes sense that logan just saved the info and didnt completely internalize it until it became useful. thomas learned what he was told to and then used it when the situation required it.

but with janus and remus thomas has to figure it all out on his own. except he doesn’t, because Logan already knew everything. he already knows what the dark sides represent, every single thing they encompass, he knows what the studies say about the problems they cause, he has understood, accepted, and internalized everything before the videos even start!! and then its only him telling the rest of the sides what he already learned on his own? he learned all this with the rest not being present or without it causing any emotion whatsoever? how can logan memorize all this stuff if thomas used to be indifferent towards it? you learn through connection with your emotions. it mAKES NO SENSE that logan knows all this.

also logan is defensive and gets frustrated easily. thats essential to his character. and you could see he was annoyed and bothered by anxiety in the first season. anxiety got in his way sometimes so logan also didn’t want him around at the beginning.  WHEn did logan have this development of suddently not caring at all what the dark sides do? not caring at all how remus affects thomas’s productivity while when roman does it he goes into screaming matches and even throwing stuff!!. it is stated that he does have feelings no matter how much he denies it, , then why doesn’t he feel anything At. All. when confronted by remus? why is he so calm around him? when did he learn to deal with him?

even worse: logan went through a whole arc of accepting virgil, just like the rest of them, but he still can’t even deal with Roman and Patton with whom he interacts literally every video?? he is so affected by them everytime they do something irrational, gets angry, and starts yelling about what does and doesn’t make sense. he says he doesn’t have this problem with remus because his ideas shouldn’t have an impact on thomas if they don’t let them. but when and how did he learn this? how does he know intrusive thoughts are different from other thoughts thomas has that he, as logic, doesn’t like?

logan said in the video its bad to try too hard to make sense of remus’s contributions. that sounds like something LOGIC would do. try too hard to make sense of him until (with experience and research) he realizes it is impossible and gets them nowhere, and also would end up hurting thomas more in the long run. then why can’t we see this development? how does he JUST. KNOW? how does he know before the duke is introduced what will and wont hurt thomas if this is the first time ever that thomas is hurt by him?

i can stay here complaining all day honestly. there’s so much logan as rational thinking, reason, logic, of a person (who doesn’t have any experience with therapy or believe in it, apparently) could have gone through while learning about dark sides of your personality. they dont have to show it on camera if they think they already showed enough of this process for virgil! but somehow imply that this development happened, and not just have logan suddenly be this perfect all knowing  entity that knows exactly what to do before it happens. i think logan lecturing them about intrusive thoughts for 20 minutes was a lazy decision, no matter how much work it took to write those dialogues. its lazy because it doesn’t fit with the storytelling style they chose to make Sanders Sides with, but they didn’t take the time to figure out a way to make it fit.

im going off again.again i can do this all day. but im going to stop now. sigh.

[abnegerudite]

Okay the amount of posts saying Logan is turning to the orange side downgrades the way Thomas thinks.

Thomas separates the bad from the good because of his religious upbringing. We see that we Remus and Roman, something Logan talks about in DWIT.

So how the heck could Logan become a dark side?

Thomas separated the positives from the negatives at a really young age. Logic is a positive trait, so I’m just curious how logic could also be a negative trait in his upbringing. I could possibly see it as a negative when logic questions the spiritual side of religion, and then it denotes into some form of ignorance, but even then that would just put logic on a spectrum rather than make him up to be a completely different side.

We see Virgil/Anxiety as being on a spectrum with the Yerkes-Dodson Curve, as too much and too little is a detriment to Thomas. We see that similar to Patton/Morality and Roman/Creativity. Patton can get too over emotional at times, which we have seen, and Roman can get too much in his head daydreaming that it puts Thomas out and away from doing tasks he needs to do. With Janus/Deceit now in play, we see how lying could both help Thomas better himself and his mental health AND make things worse. We are starting to see this spectrum theory more with Remus as well, especially in this newest asides episode (DWIT). We just haven’t really seen Logan/Logic fluctuating drastically on the spectrum as much as others, but if you notice that when he does get angry he rubs his eyes A LOT.

This moves onto the theory that the last side, the orange side, affects others through sight. I saw a post highlighting that weird photo from Moving On episode that showed Thomas mimicing the See No Evil, Hear no Evil, Speak no Evil monkeys, and how that ties in with the sides. Janus can keep the sides’ mouths shut, Remus causes the sides to cover their ears a lot (whether it’s intentional or just because he’s loud idk), so who would affect the eyes?

The last side. Orange. Who we CLEARLY see is affecting Logan in this episode. Logan couldn’t become the last side, but he could definitely be persuaded by Orange now that he recognizes he’s being ignored by Thomas. Orange is clearly manipulating Logan to think that anger is what gets Thomas to notice him, and even using that word “notice” has the connotation of “sight”.

Logan could of course still become the orange side, but I just don’t think that’s the case with everything this series has covered and mentioned in between the lines. Sorry this was so long, I didn’t mean to write an essay on this :’)

[amethystdarkwolf]

My ‘Orange Side’ predictions, theories and a lot of Logan angst.

So I've had this theory for a hot second, and only recently decided to finally sit down and write it out. This goes on for quite a bit, and is a little bit on the heavier side, as it has my predictions for the last dark side, and a bunch of little patterns that are interesting to point out, that mostly lead to angst.

Okay, enjoy!

TL;DR is right before the little bonus thing at the end that's just more angst stuff for Logan that kind of applies.

So if you've been in the fandom for really any amount of time, you will know about The Rainbow Theory. Basically, all it is, is that the sides colors will make up the rainbow, and it seems to be nearly canon. We have all the colors except one. And that color is Orange.

Using the knowledge that this side will (most likely) be orange, we have a clue about him. That he's watching, and that he's aware of the audience.

From 26:34 to 26:44, in the upper left hand corner there is a score in orange text, the number is '07734'. Now, if you were to put that number into a calculator and turn it upside down, it would spell out, 'hello.'

Now this is mostly common knowledge at this point due to the fandom (me included) absolutely losing it over the hint of a new dark side. Especially since he shows up seemingly out of nowhere. I just needed to get those establishing bits out of the way before I continued on with the theory so it's a tiny bit easier to track my thinking (I tend to not explain my points correctly before moving onto the next one so I hope I did a better job of it this time through).

He is speaking to us. He's not saying hello to Patton or Roman or even Thomas! They don't even notice it! He is speaking to the viewer, which leads to the question of what exactly this side knows, and more importantly what this side is capable of.

There is also speculation that this dark side is going to be somehow attached to or the opposite of Logan. The opposite of Logic, that implication alone should be at least a little unsettling. Now, I love Logan, I love him a lot, him and Janus are my favorites. But he does seem to have kind of not the best relations with the others at times. However, I do not think we've reached him actually despising any side, not even Remus or Janus. I think that is going to change.

The color schemes Thomas and the team have been using are really clever. They convey a lot about the character just by having the color associated with them. They have also been working with the idea of opposites. And those opposites seem to conflict quite often.

What I mean is, violet on the color wheel is the opposite of yellow. Virgil and Janus' colors. Now, it is very, very plain to see that Virgil and Janus do not get along. Whatever history they have is still up in the air for specifics, but it's obvious that they have one. And at least Virgil hates Janus.

Red and green are also opposites on the color wheel. Even though they have barely interacted, it's clear by Roman's language towards Remus that they don't have the best relationship. Roman breaks down at the mention that him and Remus are similar. Also the funhouse simile, (DWIT: 35:56) "It's a little like, looking into a funhouse mirror,  but instead of a giant head, or, like, long legs and a tiny torso... It shows you... Everything you don't want to be."   That's more than enough evidence to prove they aren't on the best terms.

Now, onto blue. Blue, more specifically, Logan's shade of blue, is opposite to orange. And judging by the pattern we see developing with the opposite colors. Logan will not like the orange side one bit. Hold onto that piece of information for a moment while I make a few more predictions based on some more patterns.

Someone has already pointed this out, (if someone will be so kind as to remind me of who pointed this out that would be lovely <3), but back in Moving On Part 2, in the background, there is a picture hanging on the wall that will typically change  to fit whatever topic they're currently on, (ex: it changed to a picture of Thomas preforming in the show he won the golden apple for when it was brought up, or a zoomed in picture of the children's book he made.) At 1:30 the picture changes to show Thomas doing the 'speak no evil, hear no evil and see no evil' poses. (Covering his mouth, ears and eyes)

The dark sides and Virgil seem to each have a connection to one of these.

Virgil: See no evil. (Embarrassing Phases: 7:32. Virgil makes the room go completely black, blocking everyone's field of vision while he changed Logan's costume.)

Janus: Speak no evil. (Self-explanatory)

Remus: Hear no evil. (DWIT: 5:36-5:48. Remus muffles the other sides conversation, making Thomas hear him clearer than anyone else with the "Have you ever imagined killing your brother?" line.)  

The last one in that same vein, would be 'do no evil'.

So what does this pattern have to do with the other patterns I've pointed out?

Well, in order to get there, I need to point out, yet another pattern. (I'm so sorry)

Logan has always been a bit more physical than the rest of the sides I think. I don't really like using pre-Fitting In information in my theories, as I'm unsure of exactly how much they had planned at that point?, but I'm unsure of how to explain my point that well without this example. In Accepting Anxiety part 1, at 6:36 you can see Thomas rubbing the back of his head where he was hit with the laptop, immediately after, you can see Logan do the same thing.

To me this sort of establishes that what happens to Thomas can happen to Logan, making him a bit more of a physical presence than the others. The brain is what stimulates pain after all, it controls all the nerve endings and pain receptors.

Another much looser example, is his puppet choice in LNTAO, the whole 'not made of felt' thing was most likely just because of what Logan said that y'know, he didn't feel anything. It is also the fact of, all of the others puppets had felt somewhere on them, except his. Which makes the puppet, in contrast, feel more sturdy and physical.

I don't think this one applies all too much, but it is worth noting that out of all of the sides, Logan tends to always end up holding something/having something more physical in his possession more than the others. (Moving on being the exception)

The note cards.

The yerkes-dodson curve chart.

In Can Lying Be Good he was given a little headset.

Logic Vs. Passion he had a notebook (Which also made an appearance in Embarrassing Phases) as well as the drawings and graphs, while he wasn't physically holding them, they were real and not animation like Roman's examples.

(If you wanna count the crofters go ahead...?)

LNTAO also had the paper ball throwing physically hurting Roman.

In SvS when he was summoned (lmao summoned to appear in court I just got that as I was typing this out.) He is holding a law book.

In DWIT he gets physically hurt, twice. Having his teeth pulled out, and the throwing star. [Side note: the little interaction at 19:07 could also apply here, showing how he's more grounded as he stays almost completely still when Remus practically jump scares him.]

In the Healthy Distractions video he has what I'm assuming is coffee-

Then in the redux, he physically ends up hurting Patton by popping up too close. An odd little detail that really didn't apply, don't you think? And it's immediately followed up with Patton reiterating that they were just figments of Thomas' imagination.

Logan is much more grounded in reality and more physical than the other sides. Which is a very good thing for Logic to be, that's what it has to be.

Now what is the actual theory?

Virgil can blind the others

Remus can mute the others

Janus can silence the others

My theory is that the 'orange side' is going to have the ability to physically or mentally control the others.

And Logan is going to be his chosen victim, at least at first.

Logan is going to have an antagonistic relationship with this side because of the fact that he takes control away from him. Which order and control is what Logan seems to thrive on!

Keeping schedules, having everything in order, being taken seriously, attempting to make sure that Thomas is punctual, all of those things are Logan trying to maintain control. Now that isn't a bad thing in this circumstance at least, he's trying to make sure Thomas doesn't do anything that would cause his life to devolve into chaos.

But when it's taken away from him it's going to send him into some kind of spiral, and lead to his two-part video. Losing control of things is scary as hell. It was one of the points brought up as to why Remus was being a pest more than usual (DWIT: 29:37-29:56). And obviously being ignored and pushed to the side isn't helping either. It could just be the straw that breaks the camels back.

Long story short, Logan's arc is going to be directly tied to that other dark side, at least in my predictions.

And it's going to hurt.

Okay, this last little bit, is purely speculation, with very little connection to anything in canonicity. All of the dark traits seem to have a connection to some kind of animal, and they're typically ones that are seen as gross or creepy in some form, spider, snake, octopus.

What if the last dark side's animal was some kind of bug? A beetle or something. Like seriously the thought of a bright orange beetle or cockroach is, disgusting.

The only reason I'm saying this is because of a random thought I had. We all know Logan's 'robot' persona he puts up, he can't feel anything, he's mechanical, right? Well, a side coming in and completely flipping all of that on it's head, and ruining the control Logan had...

That would be a real bug in the system, now wouldn't it?

Well! Thank you for reading through all of this! I know it got a bit long-winded I just like having as much evidence as possible before stating a theory.

But those were just my thoughts and I'd love to hear yours! So please tell me what you think!!!

TL;DR: My prediction is that the orange side will be able to take control over the other sides, and he will take control of Logan which would cause Logan to spiral enough to warrant his two part video.

------------

BONUS: Some more angsty bits about Logan and control, that didn't apply to the theory too much! 

So first off, to me Logan seems like a very straight-forward (ha.) problem solver. If there is a problem there is no need to go through extensive loopholes or anything, no emotional mires or musical numbers unless necessary, the problem just needs to be fixed, period end of sentence.

I have a feeling that Logan applies that same logic to himself.

In the videos prior to Losing My Motivation, Logan was very very happy and bubbly. Easily excited and willing to participate in things he probably wouldn't have otherwise. He was much more expressive. (I know this is most likely because he was not a fully fleshed out character yet, but it can tie into some angst.)

Then in Losing My Motivation, Logan was brought the conclusion that he was the problem. (Note: this was also where the infinitesimal mistake was also made.)

From then on, we can slowly see minor changes to him in the videos, he starts becoming more reserved, serious, as well as trying new things to sort of fit in? (i.e the note cards) He saw the problem, and he tried to fix it. He became the definite voice of reason. Him smiling also went down a lot.

Looking back on this better explains why Logan was so upset at the beginning of Logic Vs. Passion, 2:28-2:41. To him he's already fixed his problem, he's fixed himself, he was the problem, how could Thomas run into this problem again!

Then we get to the crofters musical, where he just completely drops his walls down and sings and has fun with something he enjoys. Then of course, Virgil and Patton kinda come and unintentionally embarrass him. And he starts getting more feelings of inadequacy which build up to the whole problem of LNTAO.

Then in SvS almost his entire time on the witness stand was Janus subtly poking at him, and at 15:04, he talks about wanting to make sure Thomas is punctual and productive. He in fact calls it his passion project, something he is PASSIONATE ABOUT.

After two or three years, Logan is still trying to fix the problem. He's still trying to fix himself.

Now this link to control is mostly in what Logan is trying to get Thomas to do, be punctual, follow schedules, produce adequate content at a steady pace, and follow the same pattern every day, according to the chart in Logic Vs. Passion. This habit forming, tends to nearly eliminate variables from Thomas' life. Earning Logan more control. Which is clearly what he's wanting, as he feels that is the way to prevent problems from happening.

[starstruck-xavier]

but where did virgil go when he ducked out??

i ask myself this all the time. i remember a theory where if a side goes to the subconscious and stays there for too long they can disappear, and sides can’t exactly die in the traditional sense so they may just stay there until they decide to come back. however, i just thought of something that seems a little more compelling.

what if virgil went to logan’s room?

i like the theory that virgil was/is logan’s “dark side” counterpart because while logan is all about logical, rational thinking, virgil is all about irrational overthinking. i also like to think about how logan used to stand where virgil does now and that if janus and patton are opposites and roman and remus are opposites, that’d leave logan and virgil (orange is a wild card to me, i have no idea what i think he’s gonna represent and that’d also result in an odd number of sides? unless there’s gonna be another one after that, but for now i’m pretty secure on thinking logan and virgil are opposites).

logan was obviously very affected by anxiety’s effects when everyone was in virgil’s room, driving the yerkes dodson curve way over. that makes me think that if virgil were to stay in logan’s room for too long, the curve would be driven the other way, far enough to the point where thomas wasn’t feeling any of his effects at all. that would also explain why he wasn’t in his own room.

the theory might be a lil shaky but we still don’t really have any answers as to where virgil went when he ducked out so this seems like a theory i’m willing to invest in. ahh idk share your thoughts!!

[galactic-magick]

Not So Different: Virgil x Reader

Request: Can I get uhh new side (Pride?) Who is female and everyone is surprised and it's virgil x reader and lots of him being jealous even tho u aren't together and angst and him being the big spoon and stuff ty mwah (sorry if this is badly written I'm going on 1 hours of sleep in the past 2 days hahaha okay - @hhh-angels​

Summary: You are Thomas’s prideful side, and you immediately bond with Roman for obvious reasons. Virgil doesn’t like that very much…

Words: 1400+

Warnings: angst, jealousy

Author’s Notes: I hope you like this! There’s a few time-skips cuz I wanted it to be kinda slow-burn and build up the angst lol. (Also I’d just like to say there is no Roman hate here! He’s kinda viewed as the bad guy in this but I promise I love him plz don’t come after me)

-

-

-

“Hi!” you pop up next to Roman, waving to Thomas. Everyone jumps, but you’re so happy to actually be here that you don’t mind their intense reaction. Deceit’s done a great job at hiding you for years, and you’re finally getting to reveal your existence.

You represent Thomas’s pride. You’re not really either a light or dark side, since pride can be used in so many different ways. Pride can be used for good, such as when Thomas is confident in his achievements, ideas, and sexuality. But if it gets too strong, it can become an issue. Excessive pride can lead to being self-absorbed, insensitive, and arrogant, and unfortunately that may be the reason you’re here.

“I’m sorry, who are you?” Thomas asks.

“I’m your pride!” you grin. “But you can just call be Y/N,”

Roman looks you up and down, “But, why are you-?”

“A girl? I just felt like presenting myself this way. Do you need me to change?”

“No, no, of course not! We can sing Disney duets together!” You and Roman immediately start singing “A Whole New World.”

Virgil rolls his eyes.

Thomas stares in disbelief, “I’m still confused, why are you here? Where did you come from?”

“You tell me, Thomas,” you laugh, continuing to sing with Roman.

“Did you guys know about her?”

“Not particularly, no,” Logan and the other sides shake their heads.

“Virgil? Is she another dark side?”

“Not exactly,” he sighs. “But I- I should’ve been able to stop her,”

“Why?”

“Yeah, why, Virgil?” your singing stops and you meet his gaze.

“I’m the one who’s supposed to balance out Thomas’s ego with self-consciousness and insecurity,”

“Who needs that,” Roman scoffs.

“Actually, he does need it,” Logan corrects, pulling up a chart. “Think of it as a modified Yerkes-Dodson curve. With anxiety, one side of the extreme is complete carelessness, and the other is full-on panic. With pride, one side would be self-loathing, and the other would be narcissism. Ideally, everyone should be in the middle, having confidence in yourself but not so much that you become ignorant or put others down,”

“Is she here because…I’m on the second side?”

“Oh no…” Patton mumbles.

“Nonsense! I see nothing wrong with Y/N being here,” Roman objects, draping an arm around your shoulders. Virgil cringes a bit.

“Technically, Roman is correct,” Logan admits hesitantly. “As long as you don’t listen to her excessively, nothing detrimental will come of her presence,”

“Okay…” Thomas exhales.

“Her getting too close to Roman is what you really need to worry about,” Virgil grumbles.

“Hey! I thought you guys were past this?”

“Maybe not,”

“Well fine, Virgil, we’ll go if you have such a big problem with us,” Roman sneers, taking your hand and sinking down.

 -

 Over the next few weeks, you and Roman have become best friends. You’ve written approximately 15 musicals together now, sung every single Disney song multiple times, and have brainstormed millions of ideas on how to help Thomas achieve his dreams in the most extravagant way possible.

“I don’t know how much longer I can take this obnoxious behavior,” Logan closes his book and slams it on the table. You and Roman are very loudly reenacting Hamilton in his room at the moment, and the noise is filling the entire mind palace.

“They’re just having fun, Logan!” Patton shrugs, playing some Go Fish with Virgil.

“Come on, Patton, you know Roman’s just going to corrupt her,” Virgil groans.

“Now, Virgil, I may have had my doubts before but there’s no need to be mean,”

“I’ve had it,” Logan stands up and stomps over to Roman’s door. “CAN I PLEASE HAVE SOME PEACE AND QUIET FOR THIRTY MINUTES?!”

With that, no one so much as breathes loudly for the rest of the day.

 -

 It’s probably way past midnight now, but you still can’t sleep. You head to the kitchen to grab a snack, jumping when you see Virgil there as well.

“What are you doing here?” you shriek.

“I could ask you the same thing,”

“I suppose so,” you grin, hoisting yourself up to sit on the counter. “I guess I wouldn’t mind the company,”

“I usually come down here to be alone,”

“Look, I know you hate me, but you could just kindly ask me to leave,”

“I don’t hate you,”

“You don’t?”

“No!” he sighs, rubbing his eyes. “Are you really so self-absorbed that you think if people aren’t all over you they hate you?”

“Excuse me?” you shoot back. “I’m pretty sure you directly said you didn’t want me around!”

“I did not say that. I said you need to be under control, and teaming up with Roman is not going to help that,”

“What’s wrong with Roman?”

“Can’t you see he’s using you? He only likes you because you’re so similar and you can sing princess songs with him!”

“And how is that bad, exactly?” you retaliate. “He’s the only one who’s been nice to me since I got here, so sorry if my choice in friends isn’t to your standards,”

“It’s just-“

“You know what, Virgil? I really thought we would get along. We both have the capacity for good and evil, and we both help to balance Thomas out. We have a lot more in common than you think,” you slide off the counter and walk out.

 -

 You and Virgil don’t speak for a while after that. Not that you talked a lot before, but that fight really solidified things. You can’t even make eye contact with each other, it’s like you’re not even there.

Roman keeps asking you what’s wrong, but you just shrug him off. How are you supposed to tell him that he’s part of the problem? That maybe if you weren’t so close, Virgil would consider talking to you?

You never meant any harm when you revealed yourself. You really thought you’d be able to get along with all the sides, but it seems that Roman’s the only one who celebrates who you are. Logan barely tolerates you, and that’s only when you’re not being obnoxious with Roman. Patton’s alright with you, but he gets a little jittery if you suggest anything that compromises his morals. And then there’s Virgil, and you know how that’s going.

You don’t really feel like you have to apologize, it’s not in your nature anyway, but you’re sick of having to avoid him all the time now. You need to talk to him again whether he likes it or not.

You swing open the door to his room without knocking and sit on the bed, “Hi,”

“Is privacy just something you don’t understand?”

“It appears so,” you laugh. “Look Virgil, I know you’re mad at me, and honestly I’m mad at you too, but I don’t want to be anymore,” You take a deep breath, “I like you. I wish we had a better start, but I’m willing to start over,”

“Are you serious?”

“Yes,” you scoot closer to him. “And I told Roman to leave us alone for the rest of the day, so don’t worry about him,”

“You didn’t have to do that,”

“I know I didn’t. But I did. So do you want to hang out or not?”

“I guess so-“ before he can finish, you grab his hand and drag him out of his room to the main area of the mind palace.

“You pick a movie, I’m gonna go steal some of Patton’s cookies,” Virgil watches you, stunned, before flopping on the couch and scrolling through the selection. He starts one as you sit down next to him, handing him some cookies.

“Just want to make sure, you actually want to hang out with me?”

“Yes, Virgil. If I didn’t I wouldn’t have asked,” you drape a blanket over the two of you and settle in.

As the movie goes on, you subconsciously rest your head on his shoulder. He stiffens immediately and you jerk back up.

“Oh my gosh I’m so sorry-“

“N-no, it’s fine,” he releases his breath. “I’m just…not used to people doing that,”

By the time the movie’s over, you’re fully asleep and Virgil freezes again, unsure what to do. Should he carry you to your room? Leave you here to sleep? Wake you up?

He slowly wraps his arms around your waist and lies down with you, being careful not to make any sudden movements. Despite his efforts, you squirm a bit in your sleep, but thankfully you don’t open your eyes. He fits his chin in the crook of your neck and dozes off himself.

He knows you didn’t have to give him a second chance, but you did. You were right, you weren’t so different after all, and he’ll always be thankful for the opportunity to be something more to you.

[hawkeye221b]

There is no such thing as a “dark side”

Okay, bold title I know, but hear me out [SPOILER WARNING FOR THE LATEST VIDEO AHEAD]

To begin with, we need to look back to whenever a “dark side” has been referenced/when the term was actually coined,

The first instance of the term “Dark Sides” was in “Can Lying be Good” (timestamp 24:15), said by none other than Roman. As soon as this is said, the camera pans to Virgil, who looks visibly uncomfortable. The community theorized, and later had it confirmed in “Dealing with Intrusive Thoughts”, that Virgil himself was a “dark side”

HOWEVER

Virgil himself is not a bad side; he serves to act as a defense mechanism for Thomas and is an important driving force within Thomas’ daily life. Without Virgil, Thomas becomes apathetic and unmotivated, as seen in “Accepting Anxiety”.

I think it’s important to remember the Yerkes–Dodson Curve, as brought up by Logan in the very same two-parter; Too much of something is counter productive, but little to none leads to the same outcome as too much the inability to adequately function to one’s optimal standards

Furthermore, it is imperative to look at Remus, the “dark” side of creativity. Whilst his humor and content is more mature, Remus himself is simply another creative outlook. He does not force Thomas into doing those horrid acts, as Thomas’ morality, logic and sense of self-preservation prevent him from doing so. Thomas, while flawed and human, is generally a good person with enough sense to know the ideas supplied by Remus are inherently and socially wrong, should they be carried out.

Now on the subject of Remus and his “good” counterpart, Roman, we must now look once again to Logan in “Can Lying be Good”. Before Logan speaks, Thomas questions if he is truly is a bad person, to which Patton responds with  “I don’t think you are. i think maybe in that moment, you honestly believed you were a bad person.”, which is an important topic to return to, but Logan’s response is rather pertinent at this moment;

“But belief doesn’t always translate to reality.... Also the concepts of good and bad are arguably meaningless because we can assign any preferred characteristics to either-”

This is unfortunately cut off by Virgil, but it is important to note the subject matter Logan was going after; the concept of “good” and “evil”. When applied to Remus and Roman, are they truly that different? At the end of the day, they are both Thomas’ Creativity, skewed apart by Thomas’ younger sense of morality that was able to discern simple meanings of right and wrong in simple moral dilemmas, as well as the influence of Thomas’ own upbringing.

And again, i point you towards the Yerkes–Dodson curve previously stated; With too much “good”, it becomes a game of spreading one’s self beyond what they are mentally or physically able to put out, which is most certainly how one raises stress levels and creates a negative environment or mindset for themselves. Likewise, too much “bad” influences very well could create a sense of apathy or flippancy at pressing or personal matters, and lead to a spiral of one’s mental, physical and emotional state of being.

Furthermore, when questioned on how and why Thomas did not know about Deceit (recently named Janus), Logan responds with the following

“You place distance between who you are and the lies that you tell. He is responsible for your doing so.”

When asked why the other “light” sides didn’t tell him about Janus, Roman responds by telling Thomas that if he really does not want to know something, Janus has the power to keep the other sides from informing him. Logan’s response is exceedingly telling in the next moment of that video.

“You don’t want to believe it. That’s where his power comes from; things that you want to believe. things that you wish were true... and things that you wish weren’t.”

I find this revelation interesting as wishful thinking and the want to believe in things is commonly associated with Roman, the “fanciful side”... and yet, it is being used here in a context to define Janus. In a theatrical Performance, one is asked or even automatically responsive to the suspension of disbelief, meaning while the viewer is aware of the performance being unrealistic, they allow themselves to believe the tiny lie in order to enjoy what is in front of them. Therefore, wouldn’t it be logically correct in saying Fanciful thinking, or simply put, Creativity in general works well with Deceit, denial or simply just the will to believe in that which is not true?

While yes, Too much deceit and lies is a horrid thing, Janus seems to serve as another sense of self-preservation within Thomas, just like Virgil, just like Patton... and just like Logan. All of the sides contribute to who Thomas is and becomes over time, and as he grows and learns, his ideals are most certainly set to alter or even abandon completely.

Let us, of course, not forget what happens when too much time was spent in both Virgil’s and Patton’s rooms; They ended up having adverse effects on Thomas and the other sides, which is peculiar when one considers they are the “light” sides.

I truly believe the sides, whether “light” or “dark” are subject to the Yerkes–Dodson Curve. Too much of one or the other s bad, but ignoring or disregarding the other because of one is harmful as well.

That’s why there is no such thing as a “Light” or “Dark” side... there is simply facets of Thomas that are learning, developing and must be used and dealt with in equal moderation for optimal functions throughout life.

[hiddendreamer67]

“Do you ever feel like you don’t belong?” For the au where the Sides shift sizes?

Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4 | Part 5 | Finale (here!)

In a world where the sides shrink or grow based on their emotions/egos, Logan is still holed away in his room at a few inches tall. The others are finally let in and do their best to help the micro-soft nerd.

October Prompt #15: Control

 I think this is the final part of shrinking-sides! Check out more of my writing at @hiddendreamerwriting!

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Logan hid his flinch well, attempting to retain at least a small amount of his composure as his perceptively gigantic fellow sides creaked open the door, Roman being the first to show himself. It was intimidating to say the least, and certainly far worse than the sensation of being overpowered by the size of his bedroom alone.

“Wow, you’re so small.” Roman stated obviously.

“I’m well aware of my stature, Roman.” Logan huffed, his cheeks blazing as he turned away from their prying eyes. 

“Yes, well, no need to get huffy, Microsoft Nerd.” Roman gave a huff of his own. Patton peeked around Roman, letting out a soft gasp.

“Oh my goodness you’re absolutely adorable.” Patton spoke softly, clearly trying (and failing) to keep from being overheard. Logan’s cheeks reddened further, the current littlest member of Thomas’ subconscious quickly feeling the situation slip further out of his control as they entered the premises.

“This is bad.” Virgil let out a hiss of breath through his teeth, coming in behind Patton and suddenly Logan was beginning to feel very outnumbered. “Logan. What the hell.” 

“Language.” Patton gently smacked him. “And Logan… what happened, kiddo?”

“Ah….” Logan’s statement trailed off. How was he meant to explain that he had lost control of his emotions? He was logic, and rationality. Logan shouldn’t be influenced by petty feelings; it was positively embarrassing. It proved that Logan was incapable of performing even his most basic of functions. Perhaps he was not necessary at all, and Thomas would become a more effective human system without his involvement-

Logan flinched, startled out of his wits as the other three sides simultaneously bumped their heads on the ceiling, forcing all involved parties to duck at an awkward angle.

“...ow.” Virgil winced, ducking lower to rub at his neck. “Don’t do that again.”

Logan clenched his hands at his sides, frustrated that his struggles had become so transparent. “I am not doing so intentionally.”

“Oh sweetie, we know.” Patton gave him a pitying look, kneeling down in front of Logan and yet still towering over the shrunken individual. “Here, let me help-”

“No!” Logan hastily rejected the offer, backpedaling away from the approaching hand. “I don’t- I’m not in need of assistance.” 

“And that’s why you’re the size of my hand?” Virgil slumped to the ground on Logan’s right, holding up his palm for emphasis. “Oh wait, smaller, because thanks to you we can’t stop growing.”

There was a thump, and Logan quickly turned his head to see Roman had taken up residence sitting on his left. The three giants were encasing him, leaving Logan feeling trapped and cornered. He bit his lip, looking up to Roman and waiting for the quip he was certain would come at any moment. 

Roman tilted his head, an uncharacteristically thoughtful expression on his face. “...Do you ever feel like you don’t belong?”

“Roman!” Patton gasped, a disappointed look crossing his features. "You're not reacting quite like I thought you would. I expect better from a charming prince like you.”

“Yeah, what the hell, princey?” Virgil hissed, and this time he wasn’t corrected for his language. “We already know he can shrink, no need to make it worse.”

“That- that’s not what I meant!” Roman looked off put by everyone’s critics. “I was making a point, you know.”

Logan frowned, not expecting the insult to be so blatant. “Are you implying that this mindset is logical?”

“No, no no no!” Roman groaned, wiping his hand down his face. “I’m trying to empathize with you here, why does no one get that? I’ll have you all recall I’m the one who’s been in this situation before.”

“Yes, and you handled that spectacularly.” Virgil rolled his eyes. 

“We can just do and say the same things again!” Patton said, his eyes shining with determination. “Logan, you are amazing and smart and we love you!”

Nothing happened.

“Uh…” Virgil shifted, looking uneasy. “I dunno, try harder?”

“Please will you let me cuddle you?” Patton whined, reaching for Logan again who ducked out of the way.

“Absolutely not!” Logan insisted. “I will not be handled like… like…”

“Like a helpless doll?” Roman offered.

The room went quiet, and Logan took a moment to reconsider the way Roman was acting. “...yes.” Logan agreed finally. 

Roman nodded. “You feel like you’re nothing. Like you don’t matter, and it doesn’t matter if we tell you you’re wrong because then it’s just going to hurt more because you were wrong and Logic’s never wrong, is he?”

The other two sides looked at Roman with puzzled expressions. Meanwhile Logan’s own jaw dropped, concerned at Roman’s new apparent skill in telepathy. “How... how were you aware of these thoughts?”

“Because they’re true.” Virgil butt in, looking to Roman for reassurance that he was indeed in on the plan and not about to make everything worse. With a nod from Roman, he continued. “If a side really mattered they wouldn’t shrink.”

“Falsehood.” Logan frowned, gesturing to Roman. “Creativity is an essential part of Thomas’ personality.”

“And so is Logic.” Patton insisted. “Logan, we need you.”

“That is not factually accurate.” Logan began to pace back and forth. “I could easily be replaced-”

“By who?” Roman scoffed. “I operate in a realm of fantasy, Patton’s head is in the clouds, and Virgil, well his line of reasoning puts us over the edge of the Yankovic curve.”

“Yerkes-Dodson curve.” Logan corrected. 

“Why does Thomas need any of us?” Virgil shrugged. “We’re not real. It just means Thomas is insane, and by the looks of things in desperate need of some therapy.”

“Virgil, don’t say such things!” Patton scolded.

“Indeed.” Logan agreed, shooting Virgil a look over the edge of his glasses. “It is quite a common coping mechanism for humans to envision manifestations of themselves as leaders for certain necessary functions. At this point we’ve become so ingrained in his subconscious that a separation from our existence could be detrimental.”

“So what you’re saying, Little L, is that we exist?” Roman questioned. 

“In a manner of speaking, yes.” Logan nodded.

“But we’re not people.” Virgil crossed his arms. “We don’t have emotions.”

“You know that statement is illogical.” Logan rolled his eyes. “Patton is quite literally the embodiment of emotions.”

“I think he meant we all have emotions.” Roman supplied gently.

Patton’s mouth formed a perfect ‘o’, finally catching on. 

“I...suppose that our existence has evolved beyond our mere functions, as evidenced by our names, most strongly exhibited in Virgil.” Logan rationalized. “If that is truly the case, it’s possible that, yes, several of us may experience something that is equivalent to human emotions from time to time-”

“Logan.” Patton interrupted gently, wringing his hands together. “It’s… it’s okay for you to have feelings, kiddo.” 

Logan paused his pacing, looking down at his feet. “...I am aware that you hold that opinion.”

“Oh come on, we were so close!” Roman groaned. “We were so close! Why can’t you just accept our help?”

“I should not require help.” Logan answered. “Rationality should be able to control emotions.”

“And what about Logan?” Roman argued. “I mean you already said you’re more than your functions now.”

“I still need to be in control to perform admirably.” Logan continued to insist, sitting down. 

“Bullshit.” (“Language.”) Virgil gave Patton a glare to tell him now was not the time for censoring. “Logan, are emotions logical?”

“Absolutely not.” Logan answered immediately. “They are complicated and illogical and infuriating.”

“And if they’re illogical, then why would a person who’s the embodiment of logic be able to handle them alone?” Virgil waved his hand slowly, urging Logan to catch on.

“Emotions are my realm, kiddo.” Patton reminded him. “Wouldn’t it make sense to accept our help?”

“Yes, indeed!” Roman clapped his hands, gleeful that things were going according to plan. “And certainly you should be able to tell when we’re telling you facts, like the fact that even if you’re a stick in the mud Thomas still needs you.”

Thomas still needs you. “I suppose there is some truth to what you’re saying.” Logan nodded thoughtfully, a hopeful warmth blooming in his chest.

“Logan, even when you’re a clueless moron, you’re still the one who wrangles the rest of us morons together.” Virgil smirked.

“You’re the smartest Einstein we’ve got!” Roman tacked on.

“Inaccurate, but appreciated.” Logan allowed a small smile to grow on his features. 

“You’re going to be okay.” Patton assured him.

Logan’s leg bumped something. He looked up, finding Patton to be at eye level, and realized that in his daze he had grown back to his original size.

“Thank you.” Logan glanced to the sides, expecting to see at least one person giving him a knowing or condescending look. Instead all three faces were warm, gentle. Welcoming. “All of you.”

Patton squealed, launching himself at Logan. “Group hug!” 

The others were quick to follow suit, tackling the nerd to the ground with ease. Despite their increased proximity, Logan found the action unintimidating this time. Instead their presence comforted him, grounding him in his ability to facilitate his duties with ease and reassuring him that they would be willing to assist him in any future emotional endeavors. 

Logan considered their odd behavior upon entering his room. Rather than smother him with kindness and lord over their superiority on this topic that was so new to Logan, the others had granted him the opportunity to come to the right conclusions enough. 

“Thank you.” Logan said again, finding that he couldn’t say it enough.

[esperinkdraws]

missing anxiety (part five)

<< Previous part | Read from the beginning! | Next part >>

Missing Anxiety taglist: @sanders-sides-uncorrect-quotes @misunderstoodshadowling @mindscape-blues @minty4green @a-fandom-trashdump @escalatingtoofast

Gen taglist: @ollyollyoxinfree @stop-it-anxiety @pushussmollworld @lildevyl @supersoftsupersleep

not my best, but what matters is that I’ve got this going again.

stuffs: arguing, upsetness, and Roman is not very nice. food mentions, technically. naming a someone who isn’t there to say.

-

It was quiet, and then it wasn’t.

It took a few minutes for Logan and Anxiety to calm everyone down. Patton looked upset and Roman was glaring at Anxiety. Logan adjusted his tie, almost like he was nervous, but he’d never allow himself to get nervous of course… Thomas just looked confused and concerned.

“Well…,” Roman said. “I don’t see why we need a replacement.”

“Roman,” Patton said quietly.

“What? The old Anxiety was a creepy cookie, Patton.”

“Pump the breaks, Princey,” Thomas warned quietly.

“He- he was like an oatmeal raisin cookie that’s primarily composed of raisins – a raisin oatmeal cookie! Nobody—”

“Roman!” Patton snapped.

Roman shut his mouth, and everyone looked at Patton. The moral Side was trembling, lips pressed together and eyes shiny. Roman didn’t seem to know what to say after that.

“Look at that, you made Morality cry,” Anxiety quipped.

“I didn’t—” Roman tried to defend himself.

“Whether you meant to or not doesn’t matter,” Anxiety said with a shrug, glancing over at Patton. Then he shrugged again, turning back to Roman. “And whether you like it or not, I’m here, and I’m not leaving. If Anxiety wasn’t needed, I wouldn’t have had to replace him. I wouldn’t be here.”

“I don’t think any of us comprehended how necessary Anxiety was, or how much he factored into Thomas’s decision making,” Logan put in. “Instilled in humans, anxiety acts naturally as a fight-or-flight reflex.”

Roman started to say something, but Logan interrupted him.

“Hold on, I’m not finished,” Logan said. He brought out a graph, seemingly out of nowhere. “The relationship between anxiety and performance can be expressed on this curve, called the Yerkes-Dodson Curve. It’s named after the psychologists, R. M. Yerkes and J. D. Dodson. They—”

“Get on with it, Calculator Watch!” Roman said, and Anxiety hissed at him. Logan didn’t dignify the creative Side with a response.

“Up here,” Logan continued, gesturing with a pen, which also seemingly came out of nowhere, “is where we want to be. Without any anxiety at all, though, Thomas is not only on this laid-back side of the curve, but he is all the way down here.” Logan now gestured to the left side of the curve, at the bottom. “Which is counterproductive for anything, even following his dreams,” Logan finished, giving a pointed look to Roman.

Roman huffed, but he didn’t say anything.

“Uh, Anxiety?” Thomas said during the short silence. Anxiety looked at him. “Why… Why did the other Anxiety leave? Do you know?”

“Oh, yeah,” Anxiety said with a nod, tapping his temple as if that explained why and how he knew. “Long story short, he felt it wasn’t worth it. Unwelcome and…” Anxiety tilted his head to the side, thinking. “Well, he felt like he was holding you back.”

“The old Anxiety—”

“Virgil.”

It went silent. “What?” Thomas asked.

Anxiety tilted his head back slightly. “The old Anxiety? He had a name. Virgil.”

Thomas opened his mouth and closed it, like a fish out of water.

“Oh,” he said.

[sugargliderowl]

As someone who has grown immune to the fear of disappointment and to a certain extent failure hence the Yerkes–Dodson curve doesn't really help much for me. Do you have any tips on how to still find reason/motivation to stop procrastination?

Ooh, gotcha. Fear and anxiety could be good motivators, but sometimes, they really aren’t. Again, it always depend on the person and circumstance.

If fear does not motivate you, which I do understand, there are other motivations that can drive you. For example, you can use positive reinforcement and award yourself with stickers, time to do hobbies, Netflix , etc. You can also think about the end result of doing the task: you’ll get an amazing grade and wrong have to worry too much, you’ll feel better about having something off your chest, you’ll improve so much afterwards, and others.

Personally, I use both fear and positivity to motivate myself. There are a lot of fear involved for me when it comes to school(“...grades”), but when it comes to art and my hobbies, I use more positive projecting thoughts (“I’ll get better and know how to do this!).

If nothing seems to work, the best thing to do is try to just do work for at least 10 minutes. Sitting down and doing the work can give you a good momentum, and your brain will force you to continue the task. Yknow, like inertia but mentally.

Motivation is so hard when it comes to schoolwork. They give you so much and expect so much out of you, but the work is either too daunting to start, tiring, boring, or just straight-up “No” material. But we’re can still do our best on it. We still can. Many lucks to you, Anon, in trying to find your best way! WOO, the QUEST has BEGUN!

[c0ttonberries]

something something Yerkes-Dodson Curve

[iwillsithereandtrytocontribute]

Home 24(?)

Masterlist | Last | Next

Warnings: maybe a reference to unsympathetic Logan or Deceit (but that's a stretch), Deceit mention

Pairings: None

Virgil woke up in an unfamiliar room. He sat up quickly, too quickly it seems, as his head swam. He clutched his forehead at the onslaught of a ringing headache. Blinking, he examined the room around him. The colors were cool and crisp, nothing like the light muted colors of Patton's room or the vibrancy of the Imagination. So not Patton or Roman then. Definitely not Deceit, and Remus would never have such a clean organized room. So that left...

Logan rose into the room, next to the bed. He straightened his glasses and tie hurriedly when he saw Virgil was awake.

"Oh good. You have regained consciousness," Logan said in a businesslike manner. "I was a tad worried when I found you lying in the Dark Side's hallway, unresponsive."

"He really did it," Virgil answered numbly. "He locked us away from- from everyone. From Thomas!" He looked up at Logan. "Because of you!"

"Virgil, we talked about the this."

Virgil scrambled out of the bed. "Just leave me alone!"

"Virgil! Wait!" Logan called after Virgil's retreating back as he sunk out. "You can't duck out again!" Virgil was gone before Logan finished.

Logan sat down in his desk chair, staring at his hands. If only time worked the way it did in his favorite show. Unfortunately, in this reality, time was linear and past mistakes couldn't be erased.

Virgil popped into his room, like a Dark Side he shuddered. He knew he couldn't duck out again. Couldn't hurt Thomas like that. He never wanted to hurt Thomas. But somehow, he was. Virgil's eternal conundrum. He hurt Thomas by being there and hurt him by leaving.

So he just stopped. Stopped doing. When Thomas called them up, Virgil just stood there. He only offered input when directly asked and even then it was halfhearted.

After this happened the third time, Thomas waited until Virgil had sunk down to recall the other three back in.

"What's going on guys? With Virgil," Thomas asked. He turned towards Patton, looking to his father figure figment to help him.

"How do you feel, Thomas?" Logan asked. "Patton feel free to chime in."

Thomas rubbed the back of his neck worriedly. "Fine I guess. I'm more worried about not being as anxious as I usually am."

"Not a good sign," Roman added.

"No, it isn't," Logan said thoughtfully. "He's not operating to the extent needed to maintain the Yerkes-"

"Yerkes-Dodson Curve, we know," the other three answered in unison.

"Oh good, you at least remember some things I teach you."

"Do you think this has something to do with-" Roman began.

"Don't say his name," Patton hissed. Everyone stared at him. "It just feels like he'll come, you know?"

"Fine, He-who-must-not-be-named. Better?"

Patton nodded.

"Frankly, yes," Logan answered. He took a deep breath, he had to be careful around this topic. "Ever since He showed up Virgil has been distracted to say the least. I propose-"

A lightbulb lit up over Roman's head, cutting Logan off with a loud ding. "We could do a video about Halloween!"

"It's almost Christmas," Logan said, miffed at the interruption.

"Exactly!" "

And Virgil will love it! He loves Halloween!" Patton squealed.

"We could make Virgil think he sprung it on you, and just talk about whatever he needs to. Feelings and all that," Logan joined in. He was slowly warming up to this idea. If it would keep suspicion off of both of them, this couldn't be so bad after all.

Sorry this took so long. I've been practically swamped with life and another project I'm working on. Thank you for your patience, I have no idea when I'll post another part of this.

[bookwormscififan]

With the Outcasts and Misfits

I’m sorry, I felt like angst.

Word count: 1673 words

Characters: Virgil (obviously), Deceit, Remus, Patton

Relationships: Platonic Anxceit, platonic Royality, platonic Moxiety

Virgil looked at the pile of clothes in his doorway. He slowly picked them up, ready to pack.

“Virgil?” He ignored the confused tone in Deceit’s voice, methodically packing his clothes into his black backpack. Unaccustomed to being ignored, Deceit walked into the room and stood to Virgil’s left.

“Virgil, what’s going on?” Deceit placed a gloved hand on Virgil’s wrist to stop him, but Virgil shook him off. He glared at Deceit, anger replacing the father-son feeling he once had.

“Don’t. You know what you did. I think it’s time to move out.” Deceit stepped back, hand over his heart as if he had been shot. His shocked expression became defensive, taking a breath to defend himself.

“I didn’t do anything. I only did my job. Protect Thomas from the less… helpful sides.” Virgil snickered, breath coming out as a hiss. He threw his old hoodie into the bag, shuffling the items to make room.

“Great job there, buddy. What am I, then? Just some escaped piece of uselessness?” He zipped his bag up and turned around, pushing past Deceit and walking out the door.

“That’s not – I never meant it like that! You know you broke through!” Virgil turned around and glared at Deceit. His eyes held more than anger, hurt and disappointment also made themselves present.

“Yes, and that made me an outcast in this side of the mindscape.” He turned again and resumed his path, staring forward with determination as Deceit sighed. He picked his spider up from the shared pet tank, stroking its back as he hissed at Deceit’s pet snake.

Remus looked up at the stairs as Virgil descended, putting his deodorant down. He leaned forward, resting his elbows on his knees and staring at the two dark sides with curiosity.

“What’s happening?” Virgil sighed, stopping halfway down the stairs.

“I’m leaving, Remus. I’m tired of being the outcast, of living aside from you all. I’m going to make my own room, and I’m going to stay there.” He ignored the offended noise Deceit made and continued his descent.

“So that’s it? It’s over? After everything we’ve been through?” Deceit followed him down the stairs, stopping beside Remus as Virgil nodded, standing in his usual place.

“Remus, why aren’t you saying anything? Say something!” Remus shrugged, taking a bite of his deodorant.

“It’s his life, Dee. If he doesn’t want to stay with us, we can’t keep him here.” Deceit stared at him, eyes wide as Virgil smiled and focused.

“Later. Not.”

  Deceit sat in his room, snake curling around his arm as he felt tears fall down his human cheek. He looked at the chest against his wall, seeing multiple photo frames of the Dark Sides through their growth.

He smiled sadly at a photo of himself carrying a baby Virgil, Deceit’s capelet replacing his blanket. As his eyes moved along the line of photos, seeing a teenage Virgil turned away from Deceit, faint blush on his cheeks as Deceit ran a comb through his hair.

The tears continued to fall as Deceit followed Virgil’s growth through the photographs. Taking his gloves off, he saw the single purple scale on his finger, picking at it until it fell off, the pain nothing compared to his heartbreak. He watched, mesmerised, as blood pooled over his skin. Quickly, he replaced the glove, watching the blood seep through the fabric, and stood up.

Wiping his tears with the clean glove, he put the scale in front of the most recent picture of Virgil: standing beside Remus with a fearful look in his eyes, dark eyeshadow making his eyes stand out.

“Why did you leave? I swear I never meant to hurt you.” Deceit looked down, sobbing as he fell to his knees and curled in on himself. His snake curled around his chest, squeezing affectionately, but Deceit ignored it.

  Virgil looked around his room, tears pricking his eyes. Whether they were tears of grief or anger, he didn’t know. Patton’s card was tacked beside his clock, a bright colour against the darkness of the area.

He looked at Logan’s place, imagining him holding his ‘Yerkes-Dodson Curve’ to prove a point. But without you at all… he's all the way down here. Smiling, he shook his head as he remembered Thomas’ face at his admission.

He looked at Roman’s place, watching him admire his Tim Burton posters. You make us... better. Virgil shook his head, wondering why he no longer believed everyone’s attempts at making him feel better.

His eyes travelled further, seeing Patton’s empty place, remembering his fear of the spider curtains (which he then changed into stars). I am incredibly proud of you, Anxiety. A small laugh escaped Virgil’s lips, and he bit his thumb, hypothesising whether Patton would still be proud of him.

“Patton…” Giving himself no time to doubt, he stuck his hands in his pockets and closed his eyes.

Sinking out, he appeared in Patton’s room, momentarily startled by the nostalgia.

“Hey, kiddo! You ok?” Virgil looked at Patton, sitting on the couch with a book in his hand. Swallowing his tears, Virgil shook his head. Patton frowned, confused and concerned.

“What’s wrong?” Virgil took a deep breath, calming himself before answering.

“I came to say goodbye.” Patton stood up, confused.

“What do you mean? Are you going somewhere?” Virgil shook his head, clenching his fists in a futile attempt to calm down.

“Not goodbye in that sense. I tried – I tried so hard to be good, to be Light so I could be friends with you. But that can’t be. Nature always wins, whether we want it or not. And clearly, it won over me.” Patton tilted his head, not quite understanding.

Virgil let out a frustrated sigh, then stuck his hands in his pockets.

“I’m a Dark Side, Patton. I was supposed to be someone Deceit hid away from everyone. Somehow, with your repression and Thomas’ passion for acting, he slipped up. I made it to the open. I managed to make myself known. And that wasn’t good.” Virgil shook his head in disappointment, then began to sink out.

“But I don’t understand why–” Virgil frowned, shrugging, and rose back up slightly.

“I should go back to them. Start living with them again. I can’t… I can’t stay in my room where you guys can find me and make me feel better. It doesn’t work that way anymore. And we have to accept that.” Closing his eyes, he looked at Patton through his bangs.

“Goodbye, Patton.” Patton watched the anxious side sink out, feebly reaching toward him. He lowered his arm, dropping his bubbly façade, and let tears fall down his face.

  When Roman arrived in Patton’s room to ask about something, he found the moral side curled on the sofa, Virgil’s questionable Christmas card in hand, and dried tears on his cheeks.

“Patton?” With a sniffle, Patton looked up, eyes hopeful before seeing Virgil’s place empty. He turned and saw Roman, then sat straighter and wiped his face.

“Hey, Roman.” Roman tilted his head, moving to sit with Patton on the couch.

“What’s wrong?” Patton sniffed, looking down at the card.

“Virgil’s gone. He doesn’t want to see us anymore. He’s a Dark Side, and he feels horrible about it.” Roman frowned, not seeing a problem with the revelation.

“Well, we’ll just have to go to his room and get him back, right?” Patton shook his head, face crumpling as new tears rose.

“He’s not going back to his room.”

“Where is he going?” Patton leaned forward, burying his head in Roman’s shirt as he wailed,

“He went back with the others. With the Dark Sides!” Roman froze, realising nobody knew where the Dark Sides actually stay.

“Oh.” He slowly wrapped his arms around Patton, trying feebly to comfort him.

  Virgil appeared in the shared Dark room, sighing heavily as he looked around. Everything looked the same; Remus still had clothes strewn around the place, and Deceit’s snake had left shed skin everywhere.

“Virgil?” Rolling his eyes, he looked at Deceit. His spider crawled onto his shoulder, and Virgil held his hand out to hold it.

“You got what you wanted. I’m back.” Deceit suppressed a smile, moving closer to Virgil to wrap him in a hug. Virgil backed away, looking at him warily.

“Dee, don’t. I don’t deserve to be loved. I’m just as unloved as you.” Deceit recoiled, small hiss escaping his lips.

“Remus loves us, Virge. You know that.” Virgil gave a bitter chuckle, then leaned forward.

“Sure, but Remus loves himself more. Look, just let me stay here for a while. At least until the Lights calm down.” Deceit nodded, stepping back and heading to the kitchen.

“Of course, V. Your room is still the way you left it. And my snake will love your spider’s company. I’m going to get you coffee.” Virgil nodded, staring at the floor and thinking of all the ways he let Thomas down.

  Deceit returned with Virgil’s coffee, sitting on the step beside his anxious adopted son. Slowly, cautiously, he wrapped an arm around Virgil, setting the coffee on the step below them. Virgil instinctively leaned into Deceit’s embrace, allowing himself to cry, dropping the calmness he had tried so hard to keep.

“I feel so useless, Dee. I don’t know what to do. I thought they would appreciate me, but after Remus showed up, I feel like some kind of monster.” Deceit shook his head, shushing Virgil and running a hand through his hair.

“You are not useless. Don’t ever let anybody give you a different impression.” Virgil leaned back, giving him a doubtful look.

“You gave me that impression before I-” Deceit held a gloved finger to his lips, eyes dark.

“I never meant to, V. You should know that. Now drink your coffee, I’m going to feed my snake.”

Virgil picked his coffee up, guiding his spider back onto his shoulder, then looked around the room again, sighing. Maybe I do belong here. With the outcasts, the misfits.

[starstruck-xavier]

an idea for logan’s two-parter

this could be entirely wrong, however i thought this up while hiking today and thought i’d share because i got very intrigued with my own idea and it helped me get through the hike lol

basically: logan’s being ignored and disregarded. thomas isn’t a left-brainy kinda person and listens more to roman (my biggest example: going into acting rather than chemical engineering) so perhaps logan’s feeling a little unwanted. he’s really important to the group and keeps everyone grounded, but can everyone see that?

assuming that virgil is/was logan’s “dark side” counterpart, i think this kind of scenario would include everyone’s favourite curve, the yerks-dodson curve. when virgil ducked out, thomas wasn’t feeling any of anxiety’s effects at all. if logan and virgil are opposites and work together to strike a balance for thomas so he can be as productive as possible, i think that logan’s disappearance would drive thomas’ anxiety way over. so, what if logan ducked out?

i have two possible reasons this could happen; either he feels like everyone else would be better off without him, or he knows that everything would fall apart without him and wants to show everyone just how important he is by letting them try to work out an issue without him there at all, then reappearing to prove that they need him there.

regardless, if he ducked out, the balance between logan and virgil would be thrown off and virgil would begin to spiral out of control, making thomas incredibly anxious and panicky without any logical thinking to calm himself down. perhaps virgil also knows that logan has ducked out and can’t bear the thought of this happening to another side after he already went through that. roman and patton are trying their best to calm virgil down but it just isn’t working as much as it would if logan was there. so, they need to go to logan’s room to find him. (side note: this would also continue the theme of virgil’s tempest tongue in every two-parter we’ve had so far, assuming that theme is intentional)

i remember that when they all went to virgil’s room, thomas still wasn’t feeling any tension at all until virgil finally appeared, so it’s possible that virgil would still be very intense as they reached logan’s room. hearing all of the noise, logan finally appears and starts to assist virgil in calming down, using breathing exercises and grounding techniques. as this happens, thomas, patton and roman all start to remember just how important logan is. he keeps everyone grounded and provides important information to the discussion. without him, anxiety was about to completely lose control and leave thomas entirely non-functional. when the balance is finally restored, virgil is calm and thomas is feeling okay again, if not perhaps a little guilty for making logan think he’d be better off gone. now, either logan begins to realise he should stand up for himself more and be heard (but not too much), or maybe he comes to terms with the fact that he won’t be listened to as much as roman, patton or even virgil but he is still important and should stick around because he’s a vital part of the group and a good friend to the others, or he was always confident in his role as logic and has now proved his point that he should not be ignored.

of course, there could be the possibility that he wouldn’t want to risk something like that or wouldn’t want to hurt virgil (their relationship could be strained if he did it on purpose and made virgil so panicked just to prove a point) and would not duck out because it doesn’t seem like the logical thing to do. however, the sides are all becoming more complex characters, to the point where they could almost be seen as individuals (though they’re not, they’re all still parts of one personality). it’s been hinted at that logan is in denial of feeling anything and that the other sides all know he has capacity for emotion just like the rest of them. if logan’s being hurt and disregarded enough, those negative emotions could cloud his logical thinking and make him do something impulsive, like ducking out. perhaps this could be when he begins to show his emotions more, knowing that keeping them all inside could make him do something that would hinder thomas’ function. because he’s flawed just like all the other sides! he can’t strive to be perfectly disciplined and not letting any emotions get in the way, so he needs to learn that having feelings doesn’t make him any less logical.

that was my spiel, i hope it’s in any way understandable! feel free to add comments or say what you thinkkk