#something something tell me about anger and devotion and chaos and love

[tojisun]

“any moment might be our last . . . we will never be here again.” excerpt from troy by david benioff, adapted from homer’s the iliad

(01, 02)

[gaysindistress]

What if Simon didn’t listen when Price told him to apologize to his girl before she does go off and find herself a better man?

a/n: This is technically part two for this list. You could read them separately but I really think you should read them both so you can fully feel the angst.

non-mcu characters masterlist

Taglist: @going-to-ikea-for-the-fries this is one is for you girl

Price stalks over to him and grabs him by the front of his vest, not caring that everyone can see what’s going on. “You call and apologize to her right now, ya hear me? It’s unacceptable for you to lie to her like that and I should have your balls for it. You fix it before she does go off and find herself a better man.”

Now let’s say that when Simon got back, things were….different. You rarely fought but now you’re bickering about every little thing and having full on battles of the will that leave you crying in the bedroom while he’s storming out. The connection between you two feels strained and distant where’s before it was warm and comforting. You barely look at each other and sometimes you think he’s straight up ignoring you.

Even the dogs have started to notice that there’s something off about mom and dad. Most nights you’ll sleep alone with the dogs by your door while Simon is on the couch. It feels like they’re laying in wait, ready to spring into action if anything were to happen. They don’t go to him as much as they did before and your female dog, Echo, refuses to leave your side. She’s become glued to you while your other dog, Zade, keeps you within eyesight at all times. It really pisses Simon off because Zade is supposed to be his dog and the mutt won’t even look at him (Simon’s words, not yours).

It all comes to a head though one night when Simon is trying to get Zade to come with him on a walk and the dog just stares at him. He doesn’t move. He doesn’t blink. He just stares into Simon’s soul and judges him for how he’s been treating you.

“Zade! Come here now!” Simon grumbles in a half shout but the dog doesn’t move a muscle. You’re in the bedroom with Echo at your feet and she glances over at you with a look that says ‘let’s go’.

What happened next is a blur. Echo barely makes it into the living room before she’s growling and placing herself between you and Simon. Zade is up and stalking closer to his sister’s side while Simon is growing more and more angry. You don’t think you even had the time to say anything before Echo and Zade tackle Simon to the ground. You know they wouldn’t hurt him but it’s still a terrifying sight and you’re doing everything you can to get the dogs off of him. You manage to get them off but they refuse to go to their kennels and keep tucked behind you, still ready to protect you if needed.

“Simon, oh my god are you okay?” You ask him in a panicked and high pitched voice as you try to help him up. He shoves your hands off of him and accidentally uses too much force which sends you to stumbling into the dogs.

Everything is absolute chaos with his anger, the dogs trying to protect you, and now you’re crying while trying not to tell him off. At this point you grab the dogs by their collars and pull them away as tears are streaming down your face. When they hear your sniffles, they immediately give into you and let you pull them to the bedroom. You don’t hear Simon as you start to pack as much as you can. The weeks of being on edge have finally gotten to you and you’re done.

You refuse to be in a relationship with a man who isn’t willing to communicate with you.

You refuse to be in a relationship with a man who used to be the most loving and devoted man you’ve ever met but now he can’t acknowledge your presence.

You refuse to be in a relationship with a man who’s come so far and has forgiven himself for the things he’s done but now he’s slipping back into his old self destructive ways.

You refuse to be in a relationship with a man who can’t be honest with himself and admit that he’s wrong.

You refuse to be in a relationship with a man who’s become Ghost.

You’ve tried having faith in him after he broke up with you but it’s rotting you from the inside out. It’s eating away at your heart, gnawing at your ribs with your flesh stuck in its teeth. This faith is liquifying the kindness and patience you once had. It’s changing you into an anxious shell of a coward who can’t stand up for yourself. Change is alright but this is not. This change is making you cruel and hopeless while it waits for you to become a faithless savage who devours whatever light touches you.

It’s only when you come back into the living room with your bags packed and the dogs ready to go that Simon says something to you.

He questions what you’re doing.

He doesn’t apologize.

“I’m leaving. We’ll figure out everything tomorrow,” you tell him as you find your keys.

“What do you mean?”

You stop. You stare at the front door with completely blank eyes. They flicker to him over your shoulder.

“I’m leaving you. I’ll call you tomorrow and we can figure out how to make it a clean break then.”

He doesn’t say a word. Neither do you after that.

He lets you walk out the door. You don’t ask him to fight for you either.

He lets you leave him. You don’t turn back either.

You meant to drive to your friend’s place but somewhere on the way there you pull over and cry until you feel like you’re going to pass out. Zade and Echo watch from the backseat of your car with their heads on your center console. They want to comfort you but there’s not exactly room for two 100 pound dogs in the front seat so they stay put. Your friend calls you frantically because she’s not home but tells you that you should come meet her wherever she’s at. As nice as it might be to get away, it’s not appealing to you at the moment so you call the only other person you know you’d be comfortable with right now.

A part of you knows it’s a mistake to call him and if Simon finds out, he might very well almost kill his captain a third time. The other part of you knows that John would be understanding and the calm presence that you want right now. He already checks on you regularly so would it be a huge surprise if you showed up on his doorstep?

As if he’s been waiting for this moment, John already has a guest room for you and has the back door open for the dogs to run around outside. They’ve met him before so they feel more secure with leaving your side although they both give him a warning look.

Now it’s important to remember that the entire time you’ve known John, you’ve been with Simon. John thinks himself a gentleman, albeit a bit gruff, but a gentleman no less so you’ve been off limits. Obviously he can’t ignore the initial attraction he felt towards you because you are an utterly breathtaking person and it would be impossible to not notice that. He’s tried to lock away the yearning that tugs at the marrow in his bones when he sees you but it’s difficult. It’s like asking a dog to stop begging; they might listen for a moment but they go back to it within seconds. Also during the course of your friendship, he’s come to know the absolute amazing person that you are and seen that you have the kindness soul he’s ever known. It didn’t used to hurt when he saw you but after that night you texted him to keep Simon safe after he broke up with you, it’s damn near unbearable. Simon told you to find yourself a better man and John knows he could be that man. He wants to be that man but only if you come to him. He won’t approach you or even hint at it with you. It needs to be you who seeks him out. It needs to be you who wants him. It needs to be you who asks him to be that man otherwise John would never be able to forgive himself if it all went wrong.

Nothing happens that night or at all for that matter during your stay with John. It was meant to only be a few days but with losing your house so suddenly and trying to navigate a world Post Simon, it ends up being a few weeks. You feel awful about it and promise that you’ll be gone as soon as you can. John always laughs it off and tells you to stay as long as you need. Secretly he’s growing accustomed to your calming presence and gentle ways. He adores how thoughtful you are when you have to work early and barely make a sound. He appreciates how you make him a plate and leave it in the fridge if he comes home late. He’s thankful that you’re comfortable enough with him to tell him about everything that’s going on.

John made a promise to himself that he wouldn’t bring up anything unless you said something first. Even when he wants desperately to know why you’re crying when you came back from Simon’s tonight, he won’t. Instead he offers you a cup of tea, a warm blanket, and some space while he busies himself in his shop outside. It absolutely destroys him to even think about leaving you alone in the living room but it’s the right thing to do.

Just as he’s getting ready to leave, your small voice stops him.

“Can…can you stay?” It’s unusual for you to not be confident in your words. It causes him to freeze to hear the uncertainty. “If..if you want.”

He smiles at the ground before turning to look at you and nod. You’re curled into a ball on the couch with your dogs at your feet but there’s space for him next to you. You lean away from the arm of the couch and he takes the hint. Settling into the space between you and couch, he tosses his arm over the back and lets you decide how to proceed. Against your logical head, you tuck yourself into his side with yours pulled around yourself and your head on his shoulder. His fingers itch to play with the ends of your hair but they stay tightly closed around the couch cushion.

“Thank you…for everything.”

“No need for that.” He murmurs with bated breath. He knows you can feel the tension, how could you not when you’re practically laying on his chest?

“One day you’re going to accept my thanks. It might not be tomorrow or the day after, but you will,” you say with a snort. He says that every single time and you reply with the same phrase every time as well.

John’s hand betrays him and starts to play with the very ends of your hair. You feel it just like you felt his strained breathing. It’s strange to feel affection from anyone else but from him, it’s…. welcomed. You don’t acknowledge it and he knows that you’re doing that for his own sake.

“Maybe,” he tosses back and his breath catches when you move closer to him. Your arm moves to wrap around his waist and stills when he tenses. It’s your silent way of asking for consent to hold him. “Love,” he starts and moves his hand away from your hair.

You move to look at him, resting your chin on his shoulder. He’s looking at you with such tenderness and warmth it makes your stomach flip.

“Do you have feelings for me?” You ask him directly, unwilling to be tossed around again. It’s abrasive and you know there’s a better way to have asked but it gets straight to the point.

John looks sick and a tight lipped smile pulls across his face as he tries to come up with an answer. “I…love I think you need to rest. There’s been a…”

“No. Answer the question.”

He glances down at your lips and that’s telling enough.

“Now isn’t the right time,” he whispers more to himself than to you. “You’ve just gone through…”

Cutting him off, you say firmly, “and that doesn’t mean I don’t know what I want.”

He can only stare at you with half lidded eyes and pray that he doesn’t break in front of you. His resolve is crumbling and it’s only thanks to his military service that he’s not throwing himself at you.

“I told him it’s over.”

John tries to interrupt you but you silence him with a pointed look. “I told him that I will always love him but that doesn’t mean I want to be with him anymore. I won’t wait around for him to figure his life out. I don’t deserve that. I deserve a man who knows what he wants and will communicate with me.”

Honestly it feels like his world is crumbling around him. You’re here snuggled into his chest and saying all these things which he knows what they mean but he can’t believe that you know what they mean. He can’t trust his own understanding of you and believe that you’d mean that.

“I need you to tell me what you want…now.”

You.

He wants you. More than anything in the world, John Price wants you and you’re asking him to confess that secret.

[cloudinthesky444]

At this point, it’s clear that Sauron is in love with Galadriel, and he knows it’s not one-sided. In the show, the feelings and interactions between the protagonists (specifically Sauron and Galadriel) are portrayed metaphorically, and it’s obvious that the directors do this on purpose to avoid angering the lorebros who seem to get upset at the idea of shipping Sauron and Galadriel and call the show an insult to Tolkien 😱😱

But anyway, that’s not what I wanted to talk about. When you watch the show and see the interactions between Sauron and Galadriel, you find yourself wondering, in the midst of all this chaos, why it seems to work so well and yet always ends up falling apart. If it’s not Sauron who ruins it, then it’s Galadriel. You know what I mean? The answer is that they attract and repel each other, and if there weren’t so many feelings and suppressed anger involved—stemming not just from past events in their lives (like Galadriel’s grief over her brother’s death or Adar’s betrayal of Sauron, which we know truly hurt him)—these past emotions mixed with their current ones create a brutal phenomenon of confusion. On one hand, Sauron doesn’t understand why Galadriel constantly rejects him. He says things like, “I see you; I know what you desire,” because he does know—but he doesn’t get why, despite their similarities, Galadriel keeps pushing him away. In the show, this is framed as a logical decision, with Galadriel rejecting him because Sauron sees her as a mere tool. And yes, in part, that’s true, but it’s also not the whole story. For me, the Sauron in the show and his desire to “use” Galadriel comes from the same trust and companionship I explained in a previous post. Sauron’s thought process about Galadriel is: “Nothing is free. You used me to achieve your redemption, so why can’t I use you now?” This extremist mindset, combined with his attachment and devotion to Galadriel, ends up manifesting in a VERY toxic way. And yes, maybe Sauron manipulates Galadriel and always feels the need to do so, but unlike his other victims, he shows a “human” side with her. Most of the times he acts passive or even affectionate in Season 2, it’s because he wants something. He can’t help but associate his surroundings with Galadriel and with people in general—he doesn’t like being touched, and when he does it voluntarily, you can tell how fake it is and that he’s only doing it because it’s the most convenient moment. This behavior, in my interpretation, breaks with Galadriel. With her, he lets his guard down, which we see in the fight scene where Galadriel attacks him, and he looks genuinely surprised (I even made a meme of that scene, LOL).

Then he tells her, “My desire is not to harm you,” and he’s right—he doesn’t want to hurt Galadriel. He dodges her blows for a long time, and that’s not like him. He’s usually ruthless and enjoys killing his victims when they least expect it 💩🙏🏼

Anyway, he dodged Galadriel’s strikes and turned a deaf ear until she brought up a topic she should’ve never touched: Sauron’s feelings. And well, that wasn’t a good idea, because her rejection drove the man back into satanism 💀

In the end, something they both share is self-deception. This self-deception is very persistent in Sauron and opportunistically manifests in Galadriel. But unlike him, she eventually accepts the consequences of her decisions, while Sauron doesn’t care at all.This same self-deception is what’s leading young Galadriel to ruin. Her inability to acknowledge the feelings and desires she once had for Halbrand surfaced when she realized he was Sauron, mixing with past emotions and events (her brother’s death and her hatred for Sauron). These two things combined altered Galadriel’s mental state, leaving her just as affected as Sauron and, as a result, expressing her hatred by trying to impale him with a sword. The reason for this? She no longer saw Halbrand in him. To her, he was now a completely different person in both body and soul. That’s why she doesn’t hesitate to attack him.

This shocks Sauron because he believes she still sees him the same way, but she doesn’t. He’s like, “Why did you do that, bestie? It’s me!!” This stops briefly when she sees an image of Halbrand. She immediately calms down, lowers her sword, and becomes passive—but then realizes the truth and attacks him again.

And well, you know, it’s sad.

The two are so similar, but they can’t understand each other when they face off. It’s terrible when two people deceive themselves—it always ends in destruction. Maybe in another reality, things could have been different, but I doubt it. They met at difficult times in their lives, which later manifested in pain and suffering, causing them frustration and confusion. But I believe this is simply part of destiny, and everything happens for a reason. This whole confrontation only serves to forge the Sauron and Galadriel we see in the future. By the time this is over, I’ll be devastated.

[abyss-seer]

*Trigger Warning*

Confrontational Pick A Card Read

What is the truth that you do not want to confront when it comes to realizing, your childhood desires ?

Trigger Warning, this reading is 18 + and contains themes of suicide and r@pe, Please read it only when you feel comfortable about it🙏🏽. And this reading of mine isn't going to be linear at all. It is just a read to channel out your anger, your fire, the inner Goddess Pele in you. So please take your time with this read. It covers a lot of vulnerable topics. If something triggers you then leave it and come back later.

USE YOUR DISCERNMENT. DO NOT FOLLOW ANYTHING BLINDLY.

*******INDIVIDUALS SEEKING LEGAL, MEDICAL, OR ANY PROFESSIONAL ADVICE ARE ADVISED TO SEEK PROFESSIONALS OF THESE RELATED AREAS. ********

THE GUIDANCE IN A TAROT CARD READING IS MEANT TO BE TAKEN AS A SECOND OPINION ONLY. THE GUIDANCE GIVEN IN TAROT CARD READINGS IS AN INDIVIDUAL OPINION THAT THE VIEWER IS ADVISED TO TAKE AS A FRIENDLY OPINION OR ADVICE OF THE TAROT READER. THE TAROT READER IS NOT RESPONSIBLE FOR THE ACTIONS TAKEN BY THESE INDIVIDUALS.

Individuals seeking mental, emotional, or psychological attention are advised to seek mental healthcare professionals, or the National Health Care Helplines of their respective countries and consider the opinions, resources, and guidance of these professionals as their first priority and the tarot reader's words as a friendly opinion or as a friendly advice.

What is the truth that you do not want to confront when it comes to realizing, your childhood desires ?

Here are the three piles

This read has a ton of quoted words in double semi colon. They seemed channeled words to me. Along with what your cards were trying to tell me.

____________________

Pile 1

Its as if you close your eyes to them. As if you are blind to them. The thing that makes you blind towards confronting that truth within yourself is your guilt. That guilt of leaving someone who loved you or whom you loved in utter chaos and despair while they were "silently" calling onto for your help. They may have doubted you for being so siren-like towards them. (Seducing them and letting their ship sink). "You must have doubted them" it's as if you thought they were doubting you the whole damn time only to realize they were utterly devoted towards you. Hence letting their ship sink because you thought they knew how to save themselves. But the ship sank and "he" never came back. "Travis Scott", the name travis could be significant. This pile could be shy and they might hesitate a lot from confrontation and feel as if an attorney or judge is about to sentence them. They wanted me to jump to pile 3. So someone who also doesn't like being talked about that much.

"You are too close to the truth" I heard the spirit say. I asked "What do they need to realize?" I heard "Avoid, Avoid Avoid avoid avoid, danger alert danger alert danger alert"

I guess its obvious why you haven't got past this issue (or the way some of you like to refer it "this pu$$y / d!¢k " ) Its not the sexual attraction its the guilt. And your Avoidance plays a bigger role in it. You need to realise, this is it, you have done it, it your past karma, leave it behind for now. Leave this desire right away and move on.

Take it how it resonates I ain't forcing anything. Wait and come back again only if you want to with an open mind.

"This ain't nothing to be afraid of, nothing but solidarity is required for this sh!t" It came through.

"Sowing seeds" You are being asked to sow seeds for your childhood desires persistently. Swati nakshatra coming through.

Avoidance tactics are not gonna help you. Its only going to keep you stuck, not away from your feelings which you have tucked away already but from your future desires as well as your dreams of becoming successful as it weighs your mind over n over, like a loop, in repeated patterns of behaviour as an excuse to get by your past deeds. Its your mind that is doing this to you, guilt tripping to you that you do not deserve this anymore when you know more than anyone else how much you deserve it too. Then will you let one bad deed spoil your day or corrupt your soul. You don't need to take this tension. Leave this past deed behind for the past and save it for future lessons.

"Ooh she mine,ooh she mine - Party Monsters"

"Heat Waves - Glass Animals"

"Wildest Dreams- Taylor Swift"

Damn! The truth you don't want to confront is that you are extremely possessive of this person and obsessed over them coming back to you to take you back, you may dream or fantasize by Ariana Grande coming through or fantasize about this person's $mexy thingy all the time, even though you don't want to admit it too. And it hurts you, to have left them behind for no reason for no one for nothing only a piece of shreds in the name paper money in a bag.

You could be gaslighting yourself into thinking, you couldn't possibly like them or should like them. There's some taboo here or your stubbornness interfering, as you couldn't ever imagine in your wildest dreams to have this person like you back. The truth you didn't want to confront yourself is the fact that you sabotaged your widest impatient dreams of yours in just a second thought. Didn't even think twice about it. Someone's name could be Nick, Peter, Ronald. Reminds me of donald duck juniors. There could have been a lie in this relationship and lots of misunderstanding and supposedly a lot of 'misandry' 'racism' by someone who broke this relationship. ("Manager" i heard, "there's something they all must be saying or talking about" I can almost hear Daffy duck saying that, for being a bad ducky and getting offended with Rose, lily and jasper for snitching with sometimes rose, sometimes lily being the one snitching about them)

You might hate being snitched on yourself and hence might sometimes do more mischief or overnoise or shout and then shout at others for listening for voice. There's something about your phone card that you don't like.

It just seems as if your fear of being snitched or gossiped is just your controlling nature of buying other people's silence so that you don't get in trouble. Im getting fraud, embezelment, stealing intellectual property or province out of greediness and rebellion out of a tough provincial goverment or really bad or controlling leader. This seemed to have caused you a lot of pressure built up around you.

And your anger could be due to the fact that this stolen whatever this is could have called a heavy guilt and same making you feel as if you do not deserve the wealth, and you may get angry in life when you got to let go of the so called possesion that you might consider as your own possesion. When this was taken away from your life karmically. You got angry in your fate. And you might often hide your embarrassment and your shame by using a set of avoidance tactics. This was initially not a very long post till I expanded it and realized how sensitive this pile could actually be. Dear pile 1, yes you did wrong but that doesn't mean you need to be demeaned, belittled or fooled every single time by people who are now doing the same things that you once. I need you to take a quick look at yourself and confront yourself. Yes you were wrong and yes you shouldn't have cheated a person. But what has happened has happened so move on. Everytime you feel the anger seething in for some injustice or something bad that happened to you. Just cool down and think about the situations in your life that led you to this same action once and just try to understand this person's perspective for doing ill to you. You have to just come to terms with the fact that you will always be a villain in some people's lives, all you can do is just come to terms with it and accept it. Hence don't let the snitching get the best of you.

Another thing if you feel witchcraft being done on you or towards you by somebody or someone to change your fate and steal your money then yeah this is a confirmation as I was seeing a big troubled black genie like figure around me in my room. If there are a series of groundhog events in your life, then please cleanse your energy and clean your space from these unpleasant groundhogging (bad luck bringing energy). Hope this reading made sense .

Love you , Bye. Hope that helps :⁠-⁠)

---------------------------------------------------------

Pile 2

"My hands feel weak, it's probably not from that clenching fist in anger anymore." "Feeling a strong grip on my shoulders, my desires, my hands,.....they are slipping away right now those dreams and desires in my hands are slipping away from me, my budget, my plans for making up my dreams and now.... Iam currently holding onto the clutches that have long since taken away my pearls" "Very dreary, dreadful yet dreamy (wet) desires " There is a dread to your life, winnowing and drenching you in salt water lake isn't going to eat you away my child" It seems to be about drenching away yourself in your desires, only to come back alive to the shore. Pile 2 you are very very desirable and "passionate to the floor" like it doesn't matter to you if what or who you are passionate about or desire to have dissolves in your little salt lake or not, you desire them and that's it, you will have them, no matter. "Even when the sky starts fallin, even when the sun don't shine" I heard "the sky is not falling, drippin"

Idk why your channeled messages are going so straightforward. I'm channeling "Rumi".

"Then I looked in my heart and there I found Him— He was nowhere else" – Rumi

Iam imagining a scenario, a couple drowning in the middle of salt lake (Im getting Dal lake in Kashmir) suddenly it starts raining and the husband starts drowning, the girl could save herself, she could have survived, but instead she decides to stay there and die there "all alone". The husband and wife stayed with each other for the rest of their lives.

And that painful love is not what you desired for yourself in your childhood. The only thing you didn't desire was to not be sent alone, to be left out alone, and you are someone very very gorgeous as a human being with scars of loneliness. It's like if your person is gone you don't know who else to win over to keep over again in your life as there is no one that seems to appeal to you the way you appeal to them. Half way mistakes, meeting people half way in your journey only to desire for so much more. Pile 2 you had and still have so much more to desire for, so much pain, so much ecstasy, just like Chandeler (someone deflects with humour or has a humorous personality) so much suppressed emotions and anger (im getting chandelier mushroom meme) then why do you not let it out? Why don't you live them a little? It isn't all about romance, life isn't ending there. "Love isn't forever, every breakup doesn't mean patch up, then why?"

Why waste up your empty thoughts and desires on someone without waiting for a wait or a quick break? You're burning up yourself like a moth drawn to a flame, breaking up yourself, burning out again and again in this weight or desire of love or this person or these people. You need to decide which juniper berry (a cone that masks like berries) are you? The blue one, pine one or the christmas fake one? Someone here could be atheletic, maybe into sports or skincare and may use a lot of juniper cream, jojoba and eucalyptus oils and lactates on skins as essentials. Maybe they rub it on their skin for some properties. "This person does cream in their job" someone here owns or works in some sort of cremery whether it be body shop or eateries (whipped cream, icing) uses dollops of it everyday or has had it recently. Some March babies here.

Now I want to refer to you as Dear Creamery, this is definitely a past lover's message, or you might get his/her dreams (train dreams)(trying to catch the bus while trying this person out) to see him. Ok yall having some 18+ dreams right now

Dear creme Bruleé, you might be harsh on the inside to yourself a lot. (It seems your person knows how much of a softie you are and they really want to know, how to people end up projecting this harsh perception as a result of your of smooth finished outer core to an extent that you may end up taking it to the depth of your core, almost end up crashing and breaking your insides (ideas, fantasies) when its no longer needed. That's why they might think you are brutal to the core at the start as you loving and hating yourself manifests as loving and hating people for bearing habits or patterns similar to yours.

Remember everyone, each and every human is connected, you interacting with yourself in the harshest way possible results in you behaving the same way with other people around you with similar remorse for having acquired a learned behaviour from you after being with you for a long a time. "THIS IS NARCISSISTIC" just channeled that. Treat people around the way you would treat yourself. That means treat yourself nice and right.

Your person wants to tell you that you have so hard on yourself and to your inner child as well to a point and an extent to which you beat yourself up extensively, self harm or self hurt when you aren't able to have something that you desire to the extent that you even stop yourself from achieving it anymore that you take the loss to your head, aren't able to move on from it and then do something dangerously su!cidal to yourself so that you can stop dreaming and desiring it later on. What an intense emotion! For some you this could be due to the unbearable pain of losing a loved one (i heard to fire, idk, i'm really really sorry if that has happened with you) and now every loss in life has become so unbearable to a point that all you want to do it is k!ll yourself or something else at the slightest sense of loss or being left alone or all alone. You cannot deal with yourself "They cannot deal with themselves when that happens" Spirit is legit telling me.

It seems like there was a fight to which you lost yourself over and over again and again and now that has ingrained into your brain (Sheesh pile 2, im sorry i dont mean to sound condescending, but if this is what chain of events you are going through,I'm sorry, My spirit is channeling "I'm hardly negative on my readings but this time I channeled fire, I channeled what indestructible inner rage was like". Yes pile 2 this is what it is, I channeled the sacred rage through you, and it asks you to be brave, fierce, bold towards your dreams and pursue it. Wherever this fear came from, don't ever let it stop. There are asking me to burn the sacred fire within to ask you of this. "You are being bloodied and your blood has flowed and will flow thousand times over, will you not be bloodied in the battlefield,yes you are wounded and you will be wounded everyday, afterall life is a battlefield then why give up now? Whats there in being wounded once, are we gonna get scared and stay in our scars or should we move on, heal our scars, face our shadows, and take the time that it takes to feel closing up of our scars and experience our body heal. Is it that hard to experience the closing up of your wounds? Remember the first time you got hurt, it hurt but then once the wound healed, the pain was gone, only fear remained that all of it would happen again if not tomorrow. Why fear it? The next time you will stronger, smarter, and better than this. You will have improved. Then why fear it? You have survived the worst.

Author's note : (I would like to share this personal experience with you, once upon a time I was SAed brutally, had to get hospitalized in a near death condition, but I survived. That bs, and that mfer came back in my life once again and did it all over me once again but this time with a gang, but I had learned by then, my wounds healed (cause i gave myself enough time) and I was stronger once again, this time I did give my best fight, little did I know I would get overpowered once again and again and again and again all of this happened with me multiple times in a row, i didn't know what to do, i didn't know why life had given me all that, but each time I grew faster, sharper and manipulated my way out of all this. All I am telling you is I managed to find a good life after all that, nowadays I don't fear it or him anymore hence could suave my way through it all and could give a life sentence to him and his bunch)

"The worst will be dealt with the last, up closely" I heard spirit say, This tyrant will be dealt with, you are being asked to focus on yourself and deal with your own desires, "I heard that story". Iam really sorry if some of you are going through anything similar. Iam really sorry, but all Iam trying to tell you is if you have a story to share and you feel like no one is going to believe you then please talk to a therapist or a mental health care professional, or a trusted friend, family member or advisor. Let it out, take others support to heal yourself. Love yourself enough while going through the process of letting those wounds heal. You can tag your story, there are hundreds of communities, thousands of people, servers ready to help you, so please don't lose hope, you are right here, feel yourself while you experience the closing of those wounds. I understand its hard, it can be really really hard, and there are times you might want to give up and lose all hope. So ask for help, ask for support to help you heal. Please do it if you want to, if and only if you are comfortable to do so, please peek through that shell you have created around, there are so many people out there and yes there might be a chance where they may not be able relate to you. Yes there might be a chance you will feel paranoid, and lost because of this but trust me there are helpful people out there. Please try to talk to them. Please reach out. Seeking justice or not is your choice, and you don't have to do that if you don't want to do that. There is no judgement or shame in it. You can do whatever you wish to do with this and no one will question you for it. You are allowed to take your time to heal and come back in your sacred space. If you are already in this energy, please continue to do so. You are already doing pretty great. Know that there is no pressure on you to file a case, and not wanting to do so is fine. Its alright. You don't have to feel bad, guilty or anything for not wanting to have to do anything with that energy. Its fine.All you do right now is relax and do not let this fear judgement of shame get to you for deciding not wanting to have anything to do with a tyrant on a legal scale. Its your wish. No one is judging or shaming you for this.

Don't let this fear ever dictate your life ever again. You do not need to act like some suave or people please anymore, if there are people pushing you to do so, please push them aside and focus on yourself, you are your own biggest priority right. Love yourself like there's no tomorrow my love, you may feel like you are going through it at times but don't let this fear of "feeling this in my body again" get you, your present or your future ever again. Yes these are post traumatic symptoms but don't let these take over you ever again my love ever again. Don't ever lash out on yourself for not being able to avoid trauma symptoms and trauma pain. Never again my love, understood, Never again. Accept your now, the change happens, you are beautiful when you are who you are, and that person or that sense of identity you carried with you for all those years can change due to this kind experience, no matter what this experience was for you. Let the person within you emerge, stop immersing her back in those of suppressed depths just because you do not recognise who this new angry inner self is anymore. She is you and she needs her way out. Let her be assertive and set her boundaries, she is trying to protect you. Let your sacred fire to reach your desires come out, don't let this passionate fire born out of these suppressed emotions burn you from within. This fire within you doesn't deserve that. You don't deserve that. I hope you understand "Yourself". Love you so much. Bye my loves, take care of yourself.

____________________________________________

Pile 3

Forhead pain, feeling vulnerable body pain issues, severe body pain issues due to an injury, Someone's name could be "Casey, Casidy, Cassey" Maybe some disney character's name. Iam hearing " loathe and pain" being loathed on, hated, (almost witch hunted kinda stereotypes), someone showing someone their place based on caste, race, religion or gender, sect or creed or bloodline (im getting racial slurs and blood number, like blood donor's number) Iam getting Mr. Kim Taehyung, someone's own sibling or brother jumping death unscathed. Iam also getting someone's listening to their son's old recording, or a dead loved one's tape recorder, somebody listening to their older son's music and his creations, preserving someone's art, culture and his beautiful memories. "Creation process" "Young Haul" "stealing from young - a line from Sabrina Carpenter's because I liked a boy" "Homewrecker Homeboy" " threw it off the baseball track/rack/team"

"my homie stole me so now Im a good $lut" "stealing your childhood dreams" Iam also getting "shallow dreams"

Let's pause shall we now? Pile 3 whats taking you so long to confront this individual or these people, cause Im seeing a lot of demeaning attitude been projected on you. "Bean" "skinny brat" ok, who are these people? "I know these people are being converted, they really ruined my life" Im getting and channeling BANKS (Jillian Rose Banks), I also got Tyra Banks , but I think this can indicate someone being in the fashion industry, "method recording, method acting"

"you do not deserve to get this crustie musty baddie "alone". What I mean by that is stop taking racial slurs on your face. Time to Queen/King Up. Mostly gently raise the fires of hell and unleash those hound dogs you had been gatekeeping for so long. Whoever these people you need to proceed with them/in them with a gentler approach in life. I heard they are the ones gatekeeping you for so long shortly after xyz incident". " You do not deserve this Anjelly/Angelino/Angelic gel, suavé fontigo/contigo"

The truth is you are hiding behind the scenes, you have dimmed your light, you are working with a level of people who can't stand the way you have reached and processed your success by following a different approach and they cannot swallow the hard pills anymore. Its just too much unprocessed, unappreciated success that is being constantly disturbed, and disrespected along with constant social disregard of a saintly and lovely individual.( "I am getting Lively human being, so you could be someone very energetic, Blake Lively and her recent lawsuit, idk about what, I scroll past mood bummer headlines")

This is bad pile 3, "its the constant disrespectful attitude that has made me charge her/oppress her over some issues". Someone's dirty laundry is being made public. This is baffling. Its like you have got so many leeches and you are baptizing them right now. Iam getting "Trident" Idk I was getting more of a Poseidon percy jackson vibes. Silver screen,bad vibes overall. Idk what this is "idk why spirit wants me to refer you as Blake Lively" "friends are really short and brown haired, teen code 16-19, under 19, rule magazine, percentage book"

God don't even ask me what I was channelling "now Iam getting Brittany is embarassing, spaces, spheres and spades and shades and her work of art is debuted, attention bulborg" someone's name could be similar bull-bohr pronounciation, Stanley is a christian boy" "origin story". Some of you could have gotten bullied by people throwing glasses, at your face, or a lot of insects. Theres a lot of glass shattering noises here. Im sorry if you went through that. Dear pile please know that no matter what you through in life, you dod not deserve someone doing this batsh!t towards you and please know that they won't get away from that all so easily.

Oh my God pile 3, what is this extra surplus channeling. So many full stops, so many breaks, as I was getting before, I feel like someone's specific dyed brunette friend is actually blonde in her hair and has a short stature and height and she isn't like her usual behaviour anymore finally turning from a friend to enemy. This person has been envious of you is trying to push you off your chance, opportunity, throne whatever. But the thing is the position or "the place that everyone got in their was to be pulled down by their facade". So what facade have you been wearing. "Abby Winters, if that's a brand name, no gurl stop hiding behind materialistic heavy you won't even carry with yourself once your soul has departed" "stole a dollar store cash bank, Dylan" "ABBA could be someone's favourite"

Thatz it!!!! Iam done no more channeling. Why is there so much spying info here and really a lot a lot of unneccesary spamming, like some corrupted file or broken record. Gosh! Pile 3 do you often deflect with the truth by spamming or ranting unnecessarily. Cause that is a lot. I just realized I was manipulated into doing something or writing so many things about things which can be related to or unrelated to. But whatever it is, my intention is not spamming. This is time waste content. There's a lot of content on social media and apps, "dating love shows, comedian platforms, game shows" Its like a black hole to be. It seems like pile 3, you do not try to take yourself too seriously which is a good quality to have, not at the expense of your time and energy being wasted. Its okay if you don't bother with disrespect and don't wanna bother yourself with the hatred. But the main problem with you is (Twitter notification) NOOOO NOOO DONT YOU GO THERE. STAY WITH FOCUS LADY/LAD FOCUS!!!!!

Coping through information overload or causing diaspora for yourself because you cannot deal or confront yourself from facing these negative tides of emotions that sweep to you through other people,and you know its happening, but instead getting impacted by the overwhelming and overflowing waves and tides of these non sensical, wierd abrasive and rash self talk (negative self talk), sometimes even overcatastrophising assumptions and projections of what other people push onto you and making it your new identity to simply co-exist, you my dear pile 3 has compromised on your legacy, wealth, status and honour a lot many times cause people don't accept you, or your status and leave it unappreciated leaving you no room but to define your self worth (by prophesising things, some of you could rebuilding an ego using psychic business to define who you are) using productivity or wealth or something special enough to set apart from other people to feel good about yourself.

And whatever that could be, that could include doing something to feel special different and untouched despite feeling the initial hatred and despise for being left alone. This just seems like some "predator attacks prey" response, its as if you were witch-hunted, ostrasized, discriminated against, "im also getting k!lled, so maybe some of you, lost yourself and your personality in this process. So whatever that hatred was which set you apart from rest (im getting "against a wolf pack" "Dont Go Insane" by DPR IAN) was what became so comfortable to live with, without any company all on your own that now friends and good people seem alien to you. These people might try to help you, but you might guard up your wall against them in fear of getting hated on (Iam also getting "r@ped" someone could have gotten hate r@ped or something like that to shut them up as people around them did not like them) And dear Pile 3 if this has happened to you, this is straight up evil and devious. People know that you did not deserve this (Iam also getting Sun Bae and date r@ped) someone could have gotten threatened with embarrassing photos of themselves or even got harassed just for talking about their opinions. Gosh Pile 3 Iam so sorry for all the embarrassment and shame you went through just for sharing your opinions, and constant hate you receive for being the so called unworthy one to an extent where you start feeling like you deserved everything you went through, cause Iam feeling like someone feels that way, to a point where they get triggered talking to new people or making new friends cause they are scared that the new clash in opinions will again make them feel as if they deserved the pain they went through. This is so sad pile 3, I am so sorry that you had to go through this. Hope you are doing well. Please get yourself a psychiatrist's help if any of this has happened, please know that you never did

Dear Pile 3 , its giving and receiving love, that dream that you hold so dear to yourself, that you always wanted to have and fulfill despite that loneliness in your life was giving and receiving love and support through family and friends. Forming bonds, developing deep and close connections, building a shell for yourself and your family, protecting your loved ones. Harmony is all you could have ever desired while suffering alone in your lonely little shell. I feel so sad for you pile 3.

It just feels like a bunch of superficial family members or friends who could have gravely betrayed made you give up on your hope and dreams to ever find a family, good friend circle ever again which could have shredded your sense of confidence in other people and your self beliefs. Making you feel as if having a family, meeting good people or having a good friend circle is impossible. Not only that you feel as if people are constantly ready to sneer at you, make fun of you or actually demean you in front of other people which wouldn't even be that much of a big deal as the triggered sensations in your body might make you feel.

Remember Not everybody is here to exploit and have faith in yourself and others around. Try to set a strict set of a boundary as you can and do not let anyone cross. For example Don't go out with strangers at night, don't invite people in your house if you are all alone. Lock all the doors and windows before you sleep. If someone does call you out, it doesn't always mean they are suspicious, you can always tell them that you are uncomfortable to do so and if you are uncomfortable to do so all alone, try taking a neighbour or bring a tazer or self defense equipment just in case.

I'm also getting that some of you may not know the cautionary rules or were never taught so. You can always check safety tips for living alone or with a partner (Im getting Hannah Montana in my head, lots of Disney kids. Some of you could love rom coms and could have been disney binging kids,) You could be someone who upholds a lot of traditional values in general but could come off as the complete opposite to many who might think of you as someone not wanting love and harmony (for eg some people might think that feminism is all about fighting with the other gender which is nothing but a way of asking equal love and compassion and not being treated like an object) so yeah even though some movements may get a bad rep due to a select few, some people might assume you to be those few. Hence may have got misunderstood many times which is pretty sad honestly. Im sorry pile 3. You should check out pile 2 only if it calls you.

Now lets talk about the actual problem here pile3, you fear seeing your dreams come as you feel that it is impossible to achieve so in a society, friend circle, or family like this. No matter what that circle was it left you disappointed to the point that you stopped dreaming of it and may have started fantasizing or doomscrolling as a way to get past these disappointments and triggers you feel with new people. Your paranoia of having different opinions than others or being different could have just triggered these past experiences to a point and extent that you end up acting on your feelings and start hating people or isolating yourself from connection you would really crave or want. That's why learn to discern between your feelings and reality. Do some creative vocations like art, craft, music, sculpting to let these emotions out. Once you find a channel. Let your feelings get out of your system as there can be a lot of suppressed anger and hate that can lash out on others. Thats why wait, perceive your biggest unprecedented fears, and do not channel them/lash them out on other people. This is your message for the day. Please take care of yourself. And do not perceive yourself as all the traumatic and evil things that some people projected on you just because most do not agree with your opinions. Your opinions and your perception is unique on its own. Stay confident in yourself about it, You never deserved anything bad for having an opinion. Please know that. And I hope you understand that as well. Thank You .

________________________

[luvsymai]

Hi I have a really weird request but I was wondering if you could write something about Katsuki and reader but reader died in the war before Katsuki and was unable to be saved. During Katsuki death where it’s like a shadowy figure of all might the figure would be reader and they want to take him with them. Idrk something really agnsty!

The Final Spark ; Katsuki Bakugo

Paring: Katsuki Bakugo x GN!Reader

Genre: Angst

Warnings: Death, angst, …

<- Masterlist

<- Part one // Part two // Part three

___________________________________

The battlefield was eerily silent, a stark contrast to the chaos that had ravaged it just moments before. The war against the League of Villains had left everything in ruins. Bodies of heroes and villains alike lay strewn across the ground, the smell of smoke and blood permeating the air.

Katsuki Bakugo, the explosive hero Dynamight, staggered through the wreckage, his costume torn and bloodied. His heart pounded with a mixture of pain and anger. He had fought with everything he had, but even his immense power had its limits. He glanced to the side, and his breath hitched. There, you laid. Your costume was bloody and torn, hair dirty and your mouth was slightly open.

He fell to his knees, gasping for breath, his vision blurred by tears he refused to let fall. He was alive, but you weren't. The memory of your final moments haunted him—your smile, the way you whispered his name, the way you protected him with your last breath. You had fought valiantly by his side, your quirk a beautiful, shimmering display of power and grace. But it hadn't been enough. He quickly went over to you, holding you gently, brushing your hair out of your face.

"Why... why did you have to go?" Bakugo choked out, his voice breaking. "Why wasn't I strong enough to save you?"

His fists clenched, nails digging into his palms. He could feel the rage boiling inside him, mixing with the overwhelming grief. He had always prided himself on his strength, his ability to protect those he cared about. But in the end, he couldn't protect you.

"Damn it!" he screamed, slamming his fists into the ground, explosions sparking feebly from his palms. "Why did it have to be you? You were supposed to stay with me! We were supposed to win this together!"

As he lays on the cold, unforgiving ground, Bakugo felt his strength ebbing away. The wounds he had sustained were too severe, the blood loss too great. He knew his time was running out, and a strange calmness settled over him. He would be with you soon. He held onto you, his grip deathly tight.

The world around him began to fade, and in the distance, he saw a figure approaching. At first, he thought it was All Might, coming to take him to the afterlife. But as the figure drew closer, he realized it was you.

You stood there, bathed in a soft, ethereal glow, your eyes filled with a warmth that he had missed so much.

"Katsuki," you said softly, your voice like a balm to his wounded soul. "It's time to come home."

His anger flared up again, a desperate attempt to hold on to something, anything. "No! You can't just... I can't just leave like this!" His voice cracked, raw and broken. "I didn't save you... I didn't get to tell you..."

You shook your head, a gentle smile on your lips. "You didn't fail, Katsuki. You fought with everything you had. And now, it's time to rest."

He felt your hand in his, warm and comforting. The pain began to fade, replaced by a sense of peace he hadn't felt since you were taken from him.

"I love you," he murmured, his voice growing weaker. The anger melted away, leaving only vulnerability and longing.

"I love you too," you replied, your voice filled with the same love and devotion you had always shown him. "I'll always love you."

As the darkness closed in, Bakugo felt himself being enveloped in your light. He knew that this was the end, but it was also a new beginning. He was finally with you again, and nothing else mattered.

In his final moments, Katsuki Bakugo smiled bitterly through the tears, his heart at peace. The world may have been lost to him, but in your arms, he had found his way home.

(A/N) I hope this is good, since i’m not really good with angst and i realise that it isn’t as sad as i hoped it would be 😭

<- Masterlist

<- Part one // Part two // Part three

[hailezz-ber34]

How I think each hashira would react if you got seriously injured on a mission!

·

Tomioka Giyuu

• Giyuu would struggle to remain composed, but his worry would be palpable in the way he hovered near you. He’d quietly but firmly demand to know everything about your condition and refuse to leave your side.

• His guilt would eat at him, thinking he should have been there to protect you. He’d stay silent but hold your hand tightly, his eyes filled with quiet determination as he vowed to keep you safe in the future.

• “Please… don’t scare me like that again,” he’d say softly, his voice betraying his emotions.

Shinazugawa Sanemi

• Sanemi’s initial reaction would be pure rage—not at you, but at the situation. He’d curse himself for not being there to protect you and might lash out at anyone who downplays your injuries.

• Despite his harsh demeanor, he’d stay by your side, his hands trembling as he tended to you. He’d scold you for being reckless, but his voice would crack with worry.

• “You better not die on me, you hear? I’m not letting you go anywhere,” he’d say, trying to mask his fear with anger.

Iguro Obanai

• Obanai’s panic would be quiet but intense. He’d focus entirely on getting you help, barking orders at anyone nearby and refusing to leave until he was sure you were stabilized.

• Once you were safe, he’d sit by your bedside, gripping your hand tightly and silently blaming himself. His insecurities would surface, and he’d quietly vow to protect you better.

• “You scared me,” he’d murmur, his voice soft and raw. “Please… don’t do that again.”

Gyomei Himejima

• Gyomei’s calmness would be reassuring even in the chaos. He’d carry you to safety himself if needed, his gentle hands steady despite his obvious worry.

• He’d pray quietly for your recovery and stay by your side, doing everything he could to help you heal physically and emotionally. His deep faith in your strength would never waver.

• “You are strong, and you will overcome this,” he’d say with unwavering certainty, his calm presence grounding you.

Tengen Uzui

• Tengen would immediately go into action mode, his usual flamboyant personality replaced with focused determination. He’d ensure you received the best care possible, even if it meant taking extreme measures.

• His guilt would weigh on him heavily, and he’d mask his worry with playful remarks to keep your spirits up. “You’re too flashy to let something like this take you down,” he’d say, though his eyes would betray his fear.

• He’d stay close to you, offering his support and vowing to fight alongside you again when you’re ready.

Rengoku Kyojuro

• Rengoku’s first priority would be getting you to safety. His usual bright demeanor would dim slightly as his worry took over, but he’d remain steadfast and strong for your sake.

• He’d constantly check on you, encouraging you with his booming voice and reassuring smile, even as his heart ached at seeing you hurt.

• “You are so strong, and I believe in you,” he’d say passionately. “Rest now, and I’ll be here when you wake.”

Kanroji Mitsuri

• Mitsuri would be beside herself with worry, her tears flowing freely as she rushed to your side. She’d fuss over you endlessly, making sure you were comfortable and cared for.

• Her emotional nature would shine as she clung to your hand, whispering soft reassurances and repeatedly telling you how much she loves you.

• “You’re going to be okay, right? You have to be okay—I can’t do this without you!” she’d say through her sobs, her devotion clear in every word.

Kocho Shinobu

• Shinobu’s medical expertise would kick in immediately. She’d work tirelessly to treat your injuries, her usual calm demeanor hiding the storm of emotions inside her.

• Once you were stable, she’d sit quietly by your side, her hand gently brushing against yours as she let herself feel the weight of her fear.

• “You gave me quite the scare,” she’d say with a soft smile. “But I’m glad you’re still here with me.”

Tokito Muichiro

• Muichiro’s reaction would be subtle at first, his blank expression hiding the deep worry bubbling beneath the surface. He’d act quickly to get you help, his usual forgetfulness replaced with sharp focus.

• Once you were safe, he’d stay by your side, his quiet presence offering comfort. If you stirred or spoke, he’d relax visibly, his soft voice cutting through the silence.

• “You’re important to me,” he’d admit quietly, his hand brushing against yours. “Don’t do anything like this again… please.”

[aemonds-sapphire]

Aftercare — Dabi x Reader

You weren’t sure if there was anything else Dabi could do to make you fall harder for him, but this certainly did the trick.

Warnings: NSFW (if you squint). Fluff. Hurt/Comfort. SOFT DABI because he deserves it!

Word count: 1.2k

Gentle kisses pressed along your jawline had you sigh as the concoction of hormones started to plunge gradually. It had become a ritual after sex, and one that you never knew you’d crave so much.

Dabi was still buried deep within you; it wasn’t necessarily uncomfortable having his cock soften with each passing second. If anything, it made you feel closer to him.

“You okay?” he murmured, his voice tickling your cheek.

Nodding curtly, you shifted slightly under him and smiled as he planted a soft kiss on your nose.

To anyone outside these four walls, he was nothing but a villain, bound to having his whole identity be reduced to that of a heartless man. He was perceived as no more as someone who spared no sympathy or mercy.

But outside these four walls, you couldn’t have him like this. Stripped bare. Body and soul. He put on his mask and did his best to remind anyone who crossed his path, that the only thing he truly and genuinely cared about was his revenge.

How wrong they all were.

How wrong he was.

“You’re so...” his voice faded momentarily as he quietly studied your face. “... beautiful.” he finally said as an afterthought, cupping your face lovingly while caressing your cheek with his thumb.

“You... you are beautiful...” you immediately retorted, which had his turquoise eyes tear away from yours.

It was cheesy, but it worked. He wasn’t used to being praised. All he had ever known his entire life had been pain and grief. Extending loving words to Dabi was a guaranteed way to having his entire devotion.

Succeeding in having his walls tumbling down was not an easy feat. He constantly struggled with letting himself

You placed your hand on his face, mimicking his caress on you. As your thumb grazed the round hoops that coated his skin, you watched his eyes close.

“I love you,” your voice was but a whisper.

Dabi didn’t return the gesture, but there was no coldness in his touch. You’d grown used to his silent displays of affection. They spoke louder than any words.

He took your hand in his and pressed a fleeting kiss on your lips before pulling out if you in a swift motion.

The sudden emptiness had a shiver prickle goosebumps across your skin. His warmth soon vanished as he sat back on the mattress; it never got easier, this part.

Just as you prepared to swing your legs to the edge of the bed, he placed both hands on your tighs, holding you in place.

“Let me take care of you.”

Surprise jabbed through your heart, and you felt a sudden wave of tranquility wash over you.

Dabi’s lips curled into the faintest of smiles followed by a sharp exhale.

Curiosity was struggling with your urge to clean up, as his thick and warm cum started to spill from you, and layers of sweat sprawled along your entire body.

You had a faint idea of what he intended to do, and it caused your heart to skip a beat.

“You don’t have to...”

Dabi ignored you, extending his hand to grab a hand towel from the nightstand; he fondled it in both hands, and soon unruly streaks of smoke emerged as he soaked it in his warm.

As soon as he brought it to your damp forehead, you jolted.

“Really... you don’t ha—“

“Why not?” he immediately cut you off, and you recognized the beginning of a frown settling on his face… and one other thing.

While you were merely trying to let him know that this wasn’t at all necessary, Dabi perceived it as something else entirely.

Rejection.

The heated piece of fabric hovered over your skin; he awaited your reply.

It was utterly painful to see how the grip from his past insisted on slipping through every crack of his being. The insecurity… the fear of rejection… the constant attempts at proving that he was worthy of your love.

Slowly, you placed your hand on top of his still one, showing him that he was free to go on.

He hesitated at first.

But you smiled reassuringly, and he fell for it. His beautiful features softened as your fingers caressed his scarred hand. A genuine sigh of relief escaped your lips once you felt the warm towel brushing along your skin.

“Been wanting to do this for a while,” he said as if lost in the moment.

You couldn’t keep yourself from smiling at his tenderness. “Really?”

“Yeah… never had anyone take care of me,” he went on, carefully swiping the sweat off your skin with skilful brushes. “Not even me.

There was a hint in his voice of something you couldn’t quite identify. It wasn’t sadness, nor anger.

He sounded relieved.

“Then you came along and…” he trailed off momentarily once the towel reached your lips. “Yeah… just returning the favor.”

Your mind urged you to say something smart and poetic, but silence took over instead as your body blissfully welcomed his every touch.

He had settled for having the warmed up palm of his other hand trail after the other; using his quirk as a tool to huel love, as opposed to wreaking havoc.

“Is this okay?” he asked.

You nodded. “More than okay.”

A genuine smile tugged at his lips, his round staples tightening the skin around them. “So you’re okay,” he concluded.

“Yes. And you?” you asked sweetly as his heated hand moved downward to join the towel that was resting on your lower abdomen.

Dabi’s turquoise eyes lit up, visibly staggered by your question. The reason was, quite frankly, simultaneously heartwarming and heartbreaking.

No one ever bothered asking him that. Something so simple and ordinary, yet he had experienced it. Not until you.

“I’m… good… yeah,” he replied, rubbing the towel along your folds in order to clean you up from the mixture of your own wetness and his cum.

You jolted when the fabric nudged your still sensitive clit, and Dabi immediately slowed down his movements. “Too much?”

“It’s fine,” you assured him, your sleepy eyes taking in as much as possible.

In time, you learnt that there was beauty in silence; in just appreciating Dabi’s company. The world outside thrived on chaos and loudness, but here it was just the two of you.

It had taken him a long time to let you in; even longer to give himself to you. You had seen the worst of him, through nightmates that would have him scream into the night and tear the staples from his skin; you had cleaned him up and helped him fix them once more. However, yoi had also witnessed him bettering himself for you. Because of you.

You lay there in silence, but your heart was beating at a deafening pace. No ‘I love you’s’ ever came from Dabi that night, or any night that followed. But none of those were needed, in truth. Those three words would never be able to convey his love for you, or yours for him.

So you took a mental note to scrap that proclamation from your vocabulary, vowing never to murmer those words together ever again.

No more telling him how much you loved him; you’d show him, just as he’d shown you.

—

Masterlist

[simpforchuchu]

Hi, may I request for chuuya with female s/o during an argument. Angst to comfort please^.^ Thank you<33

Chuuya with s/o during an argument

a/n: Hi ! I tried my best and here your request is ♥️This was my first request so... I hope you love this 🤗

Requests are open, if you want me to write something, just let me know 😊

Sorry for the grammer or spelling mistakes.English is not my main language so...

Thank you and love you 🥰

Warnings: violence, swearing, angst

Life was full of challenges, being a mafia member was one of those challenges.

Chuuya Nakahara was harder than life.

You loved him, you were in love with him, and you were devoted to him with all your heart despite all the difficulties. But sometimes everything was too heavy.

You knew he loved you too. He made you feel that at every opportunity and maybe he was even more attached to you. But there were some problems. Small but problems that could lead to great chaos...

His anger, impulsiveness, jumping into all dangerous missions without thinking about the end...

You had fights for these reasons many times and he regretted and apologized every time.

You knew he loved you very much and you couldn't be offended by him, but your last night had really changed things..

You were walking back and forth in his room, going crazy with fear. Again, he went on a mission that you didn't want him to accept, and you didn't hear from him for hours.

As the hours passed, your heart was filled with more fear. And there was still no news of Chuuya...

When the door of his room opened, you quickly jumped out of the sofa you were sitting on and looked at your lover who had entered the room covered in blood. He didn't look hurt, he was just tired and angry. And so were you.

"Why didn't you go home? You didn't have to wait here."

You got even more angry when he took off his jacket and walked towards you and saw that there was no embarrassment on his face.

"Are you fucking kidding me? For God's sake Chuuya! Do you realize how much you worry me?"

"Don't shout 'y/n' please, I'm too tired for this."

You were even more enraged and raised your voice as he walked towards his chair, ignoring you.

"I'm your girlfriend, Chuuya Nakahara. You can't go on such a dangerous mission without even telling me. Do you have any idea how worried I am for you?"

Raising your voice must have pissed him off too, so he started shouting.

"Enough 'y/n'. I'm back safely! You're underestimating me. I'm not as weak as you."

You both stared at each other in silence for a while with what he said. It was too late when Chuuya realized what he had said.

He had saved you from death many times and always protected you. Even though you knew you couldn't fight like him, it hurt so much that he said it like that. He also softened his voice as your eyes began to water.

"Baby... I didn't mean it like that. I swear I said it in anger. I'm sorry... I'm sorry a thousand times."

When he got up and tried to come towards you, you stopped him with your hand and slammed the door without saying anything...

-

When Chuuya came to Mori after drinking all night and learned that you went on a mission with Aku without him and got a minor injury, he ran to the infirmary in fear. When he peeked inside and saw you lying on the bed and your shoulder wrapped in a bandage, he cursed himself and knocked on the door and entered.

Sitting on the chair next to the bed, he took your hand on the uninjured side and took a deep breath.

"Why did you go without me 'y/n'? What if it had been worse? What if something had happened to you? How would I have lived without you?"

Even though you were still offended by him, he looked quite worried and it was obvious that he was afraid in every way. When he slowly brought your hand to his lips and placed a kiss, it was as if all your anger was gone in an instant.

"I wanted to prove to you that I'm not weak, but I think I screwed up."

With what you jokingly said, Chuuya sadly looked at you and shook his head.

"No... you're not weak or anything. I never meant to say anything like that, I shouldn't have said that. I'm so sorry baby, I'm really sorry. Please forgive me, I'm so sorry for hurting you."

You smiled when he brought your hand to his lips and kissed it again and you stroked his cheek with your hand. Your heart melted when he pressed his cheek to yours and closed his eyes.

"Chuuya, even though what you said upset me, you weren't wrong. I'm we-”

He quickly shook his head and looked into your eyes.

"No, I was wrong. You're not weak or anything. You're strong enough to pull me out of my own darkness 'y/n'. I'm really sorry. I would have been lost without you."

You smiled at what he said and straightened up a little and brought your face closer to his. When he realized what you were going to do, he approached you so that you wouldn't have any trouble and placed a gentle kiss on your lips.

"I love you Chuuya"

"I love you,too 'y/n'"

[apixrl]

DRIVER'S LICENSE.

katsuki bakugou x fem! reader

WARNING(S): angst. cheating. swearing because it's bakugou.

word count: 4.5k

song: drivers license // olivia rodrigo (i wonder why...)

note(s): so i captioned this *at the time of writing* 'hello and welcome to i've had the worst two weeks ever so i wrote a katsuki oneshot to cope' and it's probably one of my most personal pieces of writing tbh

"-come Tuesday and we'll potentially see an end to this heavy downpour of rain. Temperatures will be on the rise to around-"

The talk on the radio cut short at the jab of your finger, heaving a great sigh which faded into the muffled pitter-patter of rain from outside. The streets had been showered with heavy downpours for the last week or so, no sign of sun or a still and restful day. Notwithstanding the miserable outdoors, the windscreen wipers on your car never ceased in their duty to grant you a clear view of the road ahead. And whilst you were grateful for their devotion, it didn't feel clear in the slightest. In fact, the road had never felt so blurry.

Shivering against the cold night chill and tucking your knees cosily to your chest, you eyed the raindrops on the windows. They raced against one another before they dripped down to your car's body, their glossy presence obvious thanks to the many hues of street lamps that surrounded them. You could have watched them for hours, being honest. Something about the droplets of water battling it out quite enticing. Anything to take you away from the cruel reality you were living in.

Your heart ached and yearned. But to no avail, the one you ached and yearned for didn't love you back.

Not anymore, at least.

Just the mere thought provoked a pulsating pang to resonate throughout your entire body. A pang filled with grief and sadness. Anger and hurt. You missed his sun-kissed face on the sunny mornings. You missed his eyes and how they gazed at you from across the room. You missed the smiles and laughter he would only show for you and you alone. The sense of glee and euphoria that came with that honour. Yet all of it was gone and there was no way you could get it back.

The memories of what had been triggered more waterworks. Hot, salty tears dug at the corners of your eyes and trickled down your face. Your motionless car concealed your cries and sobs. Every thrash against the wheel as you questioned to nobody in particular what went wrong and why. How you didn't see the signs sooner. What you could have done better. When he stopped loving you. If he ever planned to stop loving you. Whether it would have hurt more if you found out sooner.

All these questions with nothing to answer them.

Katsuki Bakugou had always fascinated you. From the very moment you met. You accompanied your friend on a double date, and he was the guy who she matched for you. Whilst he originally acted as though a blind date was the last place he wanted to be, underneath the aggression you could tell there was something much more genuine and true.

And your assumptions were correct. Truth be told, Katsuki Bakugou was one of the most genuine and truest people you had met (at the time). Once it was just the two of you, he allowed his true colours to unveil. Through the smallest of kind gestures that still haunted your mind to this day. Then upon confrontation, as you bid each other goodbye at your back door, his denial resulted in a flirtatious contest which then proceeded to an intimate night that changed your life forever. From there your mind was set.

He was the one.

Emphasis on was.

So blinded with a fairy tale love you grew so accustomed to, you never saw it coming. Never in your two-year relationship - that had so much strength and commitment built on top of it, never did you think that Katsuki Bakugou would throw it all out of the window like it was nothing. Disregard your loyalty and adoration for a drunken one night stand that slowly became an occasional hookup. Which soon became a mandatory pastime once a fortnight. Then twice. Maybe more than that. You wouldn't put it past him with what you knew now.

He kept it from you for nearly six months. Six months. The only reason you discovered his lies and deception was because you were let off early one night from work. You worked a night shift, see. Your last job had fallen to shambles, and it was temporary whilst you searched for a new one. And whilst that did take a toll on your relationship with Katsuki Bakugou, mostly finding time for intimacy since his working hours were during the day, none of that gave him any right to go and do what he did.

That wasn't one of the only reasons, you knew that for sure. There were other motives for his lack of loyalty. But you were never told. After you froze at the sight of another woman under his hold and stormed straight back to your car to flee. After he chased you down the flights of stairs in nothing but baggy pants into the streets of a twilight Musutafu. After you screamed into the darkness and belted your fists against his chest. Fists that were driven with rage and hurt and every emotion that burned like the hottest of fires and froze like the coldest of ice. He never even told you. He never made an effort to address it. Nor had he attempted to call or even try to visit your Mom's house - where you stayed as you searched for a permanent place to live. Just because you retreated for your car and cried that it was over, he never tried. But that didn't mean you weren't allowed an explanation. An apology. Something to give you a form of closure and a reason to move on. But you never did.

That wasn't even what hurt the most, either.

As silly as it was, the thing that hurt you the most was the very car you sat in.

EIGHT MONTHS AGO . . .

The red glow of traffic lights hit Katsuki's vermilion irises as he stared dead ahead at the long line of vehicles, the ash-blond heaving a sigh into the air. His finger tapped impatiently against the steering wheel he gripped with one hand, the spare rested casually against your upper thigh affectionately.

"I can't believe we have to sit through this torture just to go to some damn party," Katsuki grumbled, taking a glance over at you. His brows furrowed when he met you peacefully slouched down, nose dug into your phone as you presumably played some sort of game to pass the time. Like you had no care in the world for your predicament.

"It's your best friend's birthday, love," You mused back, Katsuki surprised you even listened based on your focused expression directed towards your phone. "It's not like we can just miss it,"

"Yeah, but we could have missed all this pain by taking the train instead of driving across town during rush hour,"

"Trains are icky, the seats would have ruined your suit and my dress," You pointed out, looking at the blond over your screen, sending him a sweet smile. He cocked a brow, a smirk creeping its way onto his lips as a scoff of a laugh broke out between them.

"Right, and laying down like a sloth is gonna help keep your dress uncreased?" He returned, amused at your realisation. At his comment, you sat up faintly and pouted your lip.

"Driving means more time to play Gravity Pops, and so does traffic,"

"Seriously? That's the game you're playing? You're such a dumbass,"

"Yes! I'm in the top 11% globally! I need to get to number one!" Was your protest, your arms flailing ahead of you briefly for dramatic emphasis. Katsuki clicked his tongue and rolled his eyes, though the small smile plastered over his lips betrayed his initial reaction. Unable to deny your determination, he spoke with confidence and almost a sense of pride.

"Number one, hm? Clearly rubbing off on you aren't I?"

"In a way, yes,"

"That's my girl," Katsuki remarked, earning a giggle from you that was uplifting to hear. It was there your attention went back to your phone, but Katsuki wasn't done. "So, speaking of cars, Y/N," Hearing his chosen tone - which sounded suggestive, you eyed him closely. Hesitant to reply as you had a sense of what he planned to say.

"...Yes?"

"Have you thought any more about getting your driver's license yet?"

Called it.

"...No,"

"What?" Katsuki began, tilting his head. He was surprised that he felt surprised. You had said those words in regards to this topic countless times. Still, he persisted. "Is that a no meaning you haven't or no meaning that you don't want to?"

"Both?" You half-guessed, sheepishly grinning at the look you were sent. "Look, cars scare me okay? And so do roads. And people. My nerves wouldn't be able to handle it! I can barely communicate with people face to face, so me being on the road is a recipe for disaster!"

"I know but -," Katsuki exhaled sharply, understanding your reasoning. You had voiced these concerns when confiding to Katsuki about your fears of the road. Something built and corrupted from social media as well as phobias and fears in general, it was a battle you had yet to overcome. You wanted to drive but was terrified of messing up or causing chaos on the road. Potentially inflicting harm to someone and yourself. You still weren't sure what triggered it all, but over the years it had manifested into something quite irrational, to say the least. Katsuki had been supportive of it and whilst he truly would love to always act as your personal taxi - you couldn't hide from it forever. It wasn't his job to keep you in your comfort zone. That, and he couldn't always be there for you that way. What if he was miles away and you had somewhere urgent to go like the hospital? "It's not as scary as you think. I know it's hard to believe that but seriously. The freedom you get from driving is amazing,"

"I'll think about it a little longer, okay?" You said with hesitancy, looking at Katsuki for a sign of confirmation. He nodded in defeat, knowing you probably needed more time and felt put on the spot. So he averted his eyes back to the road to check if the traffic had moved at all. It had not.

"Okay," Katsuki said. "But I can't be your taxi service forever,"

"But I like you being my taxi service," You jokingly said, a little sadness in your tone. "Your road rage is funny and I like watching you get out of the car and walk to my door after pulling up in my driveway,"

"What do you mean?" Katsuki asked, catching the twitch of a smile on your face upon saying those words. It struck his interest in what you could mean.

"You know, like when you say you're coming to pick me up?" You explained. "You pull up at my driveway and I don't know... simple things like that just remind me of how much I love you. It's dumb really, but it's important to me,"

"Really?" Katsuki questioned in disbelief. How something so small and meaningless could mean so much was puzzling. He couldn't understand why it was so special to you. But that didn't invalidate it in any shape or form. So he pushed that aside, replacing his wonder with gratitude. He returned to your bashful and flustered features, feeling a smile grow on his face.

"Yeah," You said, shrugging to downplay your words. "I love you. Stuff like that means a lot to me,"

"I love you too, even though you're a dumbass," Katsuki said, humbled by what you had said. The two of you shared a gentle exchange, your hand grabbing hold of Katsuki's as you gave it a squeeze. He squeezed back, and silence ensued. Had he realised such a thing sooner, then Katsuki would have pulled up in your driveway much more than he had been doing. But at that a thought struck his mind, victoriously smirking as he had an idea on how to potentially sway your worries. Or begin swaying it. Something was better than nothing, after all. "But what if I wanted you to pull up in my driveway one day?" His words caused you to look over at him in curiosity, hearing the seriousness in the question. It caught you off guard momentarily, having to contemplate as you gradually concluded that he had a point.

"Well one day, maybe I will," You vaguely replied and sat up a little bit. The hand holding yours pulled back and lifted to land on your shoulder, gripping reassuringly tight.

"I hope you do, I'd like to get in on this driveway action," He joked and smirked, faith riddled in his expression. You giggled ever so slightly, tempted to lean forward and peck Katsuki on the lips in thanks, but never a thing was to happen as the alerting red light from outside switched to warm amber.

"Ah!" Katsuki yelled in triumph, his attention leaving you swiftly as he got back into the driver's seat. Giving you no opportunity to respond to him and overall ruining the moment. "Took fucking long enough!"

The light turned green, and he set the car in motion, leaving you with your thoughts and the words he had uttered that day as the traffic stood still.

All your efforts, all your time devoted to getting over your fear of driving and the road as a whole... all of it was pointless. You did it for him. You promised him you would overcome your fears and better yourself. He built that motivation up brick by brick until you could grab hold and seize control. He wasted all that time to get you to reach such a stepping stone only to abandon it once it was through.

Just so you could pull up in his driveway, just like he requested. And what did you get in return when you finally did? A stab in the back and the loss of your other half.

You wiped your eyes via the sleeve of your hoodie, dampening the cuffs. Sniffling and exhaling a shaky breath, your gaze landed on nothing in particular. Yet somewhere within your clouded mind, you found interest. As that was where your gaze remained for a certain amount of time. You weren't sure how long exactly. It could have felt like an hour and only been five minutes. Or it could have felt like five minutes and was actually an entire hour. Either way, the clock ticked on and didn't wait for you to stop.

It was a good thing you had pushed your fears down and rose above them. It just pained you that you didn't even do it for yourself. Without Katsuki Bakugou, you never had any intentions of doing so. As a matter of fact, you had set out to take the train or bus for the rest of your life. Hell, you were going to use a bike and scooter if you got desperate. Had he even acknowledged how much work you put in just to get where you were? Was all that effort part of the reason why he decided to cheat? There was absolutely no telling. Absolutely no telling at all.

You wondered what he was doing now. Was he laid in bed resting peacefully? Out with his friends for a boy's night only? Maybe cooking his favourite curry? Possibly on a late-night jog despite the harsh weather? It never stopped him other times.

Did he ever think about you? Regret what he did and the actions he took? Had he ever considered apologising? Would he ever apologise? What if he was celebrating the fact you were no longer in his life? Had there ever been any love there for you in the start? Did he ever actually want you to get your driver's license because he believed in you? Or was it so he could get rid of you with much more ease? Make his departure less severe and less selfish? A way to justify his choices because it's not like you were hopelessly left to suffer everyday life now that you had a means of transport. Was he really that cruel?

Your thoughts were interrupted by the sharp jingle of your phone, the device lighting up as it sat in the passenger seat to your left. It took two or three rings for you to glance over at it, E/C eyes sore and drained from crying out. You squinted them to read the caller, seeing the name 'Work' fade in and out on the brightly lit screen. For a second or two you argued back and forth on whether to even bother picking up. Something about reaching across for your phone requiring a magnitude of energy you no longer possessed. Having spent it all on your cries of agony and the deprivation of your old life as a whole.

However, you had ignored your work in the last couple of weeks too many times now. So many times that pulling the same stunt again would probably risk you losing your job. It's not like your work was interested in why you felt such overwhelming pain... all they cared about was you turning up to do what you were hired to.

So using a forceful hand, you leaned over to pick it up. You fumbled to grip your phone and accepted the call with a dainty tap of your thumb. Then you blinked away your tears and subtly sniffed, pressing your phone to your ear to address the caller.

"Hello?" You practically croaked, quick to clear your throat and push any signs of upset down. It was presumably dry from how much you'd cried in the last two hours.

"L/N! Hey! Glad you finally picked up!" Unlike the droll and unvarying tones of your boss, the person on the other end was much more lively and greeting. So much so you could only assume it was none other than your work colleague, Etsuko. Probably the only person you genuinely liked where you worked, and the only person who made the time pass by faster. "I was worried you were gonna leave me on answer phone again,"

"Hm, what? Oh right. Yeah. Sorry about that. Haven't been feeling too great," You lied, even though it wasn't a complete fib. You hadn't been feeling great at all. You had never felt so rock bottom. It all just originated from your mind over anything else. But when did work care about that?

"Sounds like it, I hope you've been okay!" Still cheery as ever, Etsuko followed up with a laugh to fill the silence you created by not saying anything. "Is everything well? It's nothing serious, is it?"

"No. It's not. Just some dumb cold I caught," You excused. "I'm better now, though," Slouching down in your seat, you decided to ask the question that had been roaming your mind the last minute or so. "So why are you calling?"

"Oh, right!" Etsuko said. "Mr Kobashigawa was just wondering when you planned on coming back - for schedule reasons and to get people to fill in for your shifts,"

"I er...," Not entirely sure how to answer, you stuttered as your words cowered away in your attempt to speak. "I don't -,"

"It's okay, he doesn't need an answer yet," Etsuko reassured. "Maybe in the next day or two, though? He wasn't really specific, being honest,"

You sighed at the guilt brewing in your stomach. You weren't even sick for crying out loud! Why were you lying just so you could wallow in your own sadness?! Like that was going to change anything! Sitting around and crying wasn't going to give you what you wanted. You weren't getting him back. Katsuki Bakugou wasn't yours anymore. He made that clear by cheating. By making minimal effort to give you an explanation. By causing you so much pain with little care or concern. Why couldn't you get it through your thick skull that your feelings didn't matter anymore?! That they were being wasted on a lost cause. A lost relationship!

"Well I mean -," You started, running a hand through your hair as you tread carefully on your words. "I could come in tonight? Has Mr Kobashigawa got someone to fill for me yet?"

"Um... no? I don't think so?" Etsuko answered, uncertainty in her voice. "Let me go check. Be right back!" And with that, the line fell dead. The call didn't end, just Etsuko placing the phone down to get an answer for you. Leaving you all by your lonesome once more.

Reflecting, you could see the logic in your thoughts. The best course of action would be to hold your head up high and live life the way it was before. When you were happy. Just... excluding the factors that actually made you happy. Which was him. Wouldn't that be healthier than crying all the time?

Yes, it would. But was it what you wanted? Not really.

"L/N!" The voice in your ear startled you to the point you nearly dropped your phone, panicking through a gasp as you fiddled to grab hold of it again.

"Wa-! Careful you nearly scared me half to death!"

"Oops, sorry!" Etsuko giggled softy, sounding as perky as ever. "I'm just excited to tell you that nobody's filling in your shift! You can still come in for ten-thirty!"

"I-I can?" You asked. After an upbeat 'yeah!' filtered through your ears, you considered your options. Remaining in the serene, quiet confines of your car with only the downfall of rain to accompany you sounded like utter bliss, given how you felt. But you felt an internal kick up the backside which told you - no... demanded you to just get over this moping attitude of yours and look on the bright side. To get over the lack of closure and simply... move on.

Yeah... if he found out you were an utter train wreck thanks to the damage he inflicted; Katsuki Bakugou would probably revel in it. He had a history of gaining pleasure from other's misfortunes... or it was rumoured he did (during his younger years, anyway). You had never wanted to believe it but you couldn't find a reason to refute it anymore. After all you had been through, it seemed to fit his character and personality more than ever. So with that fact apparent, you held a firm forefront and searched for a determined tone, and made your answer to your friend.

"You betcha I'm coming in! I'll see you in half an hour!"

Too enthusiastic? Probably. Still, it was better than acting pessimistic and hopeless. No matter, however, because that was exactly the attitude Etsuko had been hoping for.

"Alrighty!" She exclaimed, smile audible in her voice from the other end. "I can't wait to get our dynamic duo going again! I've missed you!"

"Yeah, me too, 'Suko," You hummed in agreement.

"Great! Catch ya later my partner in crime,"

"Heh. You too, dumbass," You found a reason to smile from her childish behaviour, though your choice of wording seemed to hit a nerve. It did more than that, it practically reverted all that confidence and progress you had made in the last ten minutes of being on the phone. All from one innocent word that escaped your lips.

Dumbass.

That's what he used to call you.

The phone call had ended without you even noticing, your phone still pressed to your ear as a small buzz sounded into it. You stared dead ahead, flashes of all the times he had said that word to you running through your memory. It was his form of a pet name. Some might see it as a little degrading on the surface, but you never minded. Once you learned the deeper meaning of the name, it became something equivalent to the likes of 'Sunshine' or 'Angel'. If anything, you ended up preferring it to those sorts of nicknames. Hence why Katsuki Bakugou had called you it on so many occasions.

No. Stop it. You can't let something like that bother you. Not after the efforts you just went to. Stop. Shaking yourself out of it, you returned to reality and permitted your phone to drop onto your lap. Your hand once holding it gripped onto your steering wheel, the other following shortly behind to do the same.

"I love you too, even if you're a dumbass,"

That rung in your head one final time, tormenting and mocking your present. The things you'd be willing to do to hear him say that to you one last time...

"No," You firmly shook your head, banging it lightly against the headrest to return yourself to reality. An attempt to knock those words to the back of your mind where you could lock them in a securely tight safe for the rest of eternity. "Just... just don't think about it. Easy. Just focus on what you're doing now," You reached for your keys which sat in the ignition, taking hold and turning them ever so slightly. Your car stirred to life, engine rumbling and the dials lighting up in a form of warm greeting. "You're going to work. No more feeling sorry for yourself,"

No more feeling sorry for yourself.

Your eyes set themselves on the road ahead. The vacant, dark and solitary road that didn't wait for you to make your decision. Life moved on after all, so if you were going to do anything - it was to catch up and take the winning lead.

So despite your circumstances; your inner desires and wishes and begs for what you wanted back but to no avail would ever get, you pulled out of your parking space (which had long exceeded the time limit, thankfully nobody was around to see) that drowned in pitiful rains of the night, and began to make your way down the street. In search of a place better than the one you were trapped in.

An endless road that wasn't all that clear, you were going to tackle it. Not for anyone else, unlike the last time you met difficulty and hardships. No, no, no. This time it was for your sake. All the mental energy to recover and become a better version of yourself, in the endgame it was all for you. You could push past all the deceit and lies you had been told and you could push past your normality which was him. Katsuki Bakugou. The man that hurt you as nobody had ever done before. You could create new normality without him.

A thought of forever he created and destroyed, resorted to driving alone past his street, never to be thought of again.

[awellboiledicicle]

Just realized that Hera would honestly only agree to help Hypnos and Timo marry... after an exceedingly annoying list of tasks.

Not because she’s opposed to Hypnos personally, but being married to Zeus means she has a healthy assumption that any god trying to get with a mortal in ANY circumstance is up to something unsavory. Like, kudos for wanting to wed and asking her of all people, but she’s had this girl’s mother begging her to send a good match for like... years. And suddenly he pops up? Fishy. Not to mention, she’s talked Hypnos into things before. Sure, in return for an IOU that he’s technically calling in right now. But he can be talked into things that most people would consider a bad idea. So for all she knows Timo seduced him as a way to get immortality and he’s not seeing it.

Which, honestly, if that were the case she’d kind of admire. Because that’s some top tier scheming for a mortal that’s not already a witch or tangled up in the relations of gods.

But, no, they seem genuinely to like one another and simply wish to marry without her dying. Which could be an act. Thus, a task list.

Unfortunately for her, these two weirdos fucking love lists and each other. And unfortunately for them, her template for these tasks is a Psyche level gauntlet that has to happen in the newly thawing world.

Upside is Timo has several deeply determined brothers, Hypnos himself, and a mother that has been so deeply hoping for a good husband for her daughter that the gods should wish for that level of emotional devotion. Hypnos has simply his task of revealing his identity and reporting back on how she takes it. Well, and securing for her a place in the underworld, but Nyx would rather perish back into the chaos of the universe than let some olympian tell her son he can’t wed over something like letting her into the house.

Which, actually, Hera might feel slightly foolish seeing Timo’s reaction to his reveal. Because if Timo was scheming, that strong of a “what in the name of the gods were you thinking?/Oh gods, i have messed up” reaction wouldn’t get her anywhere. If anything Hera expected her to overplay the surprise before moving swiftly to being happy about it. And like, the turn to “Thank you, kind Eros, for striking true even in sleep! How kind of Aphrodite to bless me enough to tempt the heart of a god! Hypnos, oh Hypnos, I... Still i love you, no matter your face. For i love your heart. Pray forgive my anger-- you know how i dislike being tricked, even for the good! No matter, i forgive this. And what good this is, to know my love was returned. I pray you still do so, even in the face of my reaction.” that turn still happens, but only after a whole range of emotions and Hypnos genuinely only not running away because he was too emotionally overwhelmed and he knew Hera was watching. And he knows it was lying, to stay Lykos for so long. So he sits and goes through the fucking stages of grief while she processes and then he honestly doesn’t know how to process that she forgives him.

Which is probably why the list of tasks is so long, actually, because Hera--though it is positive for the marriage that they care so much for one another--would be somewhat grumpy she wasn’t right on her hunch.

Now i’m pondering what all she’d have Timo do. hmm

[starlight-ascension]

The girls as Power Quotes

Nagisa: “You could sooner divert a river from its course than deny my nature” 

Honoka: “You will be reduced down to a single atom once I am done with you”

Hikari: “I see now that the circumstances of one’s birth are irrelevant: it’s what you do with the gift of life that determines who you are.” 

Nozomi: “Impudent of you to assume I will meet a mortal end” 

Rin: “I survived because the fire inside me burned brighter than the fire around me” 

Urara: “Each comment is a prayer, bringing me closer to emerging from my cursed plane. Thank you for heralding the apocalypse this old god brings.” 

Komachi: “Every man’s heart one day beats its final beat. His lungs breathe their final breath. And if what that man did in his life makes the blood pulse in the body of others and makes them bleed deeper in something that’s larger than life, than his essence, his spirit, will be immortalized by the storytellers.” 

Karen: “The words of prophets are written on the subway walls” 

Kurumi: “In a world of blood and chaos, rabbits must hunt as wolves” 

Love: “Tonight you spoke with the devil. The devil looked a lot like you.” 

Miki: “Your boos mean nothing. I’ve seen what makes you cheer.” 

Inori: “No pet is perfect, it becomes perfect when you accept it for what it is.” 

Setsuna: “Can you feel your heart burning? Can you feel the struggle within? The fear within me is beyond anything your soul can make. You cannot kill me in a way that matters” 

Tsubomi: “No one will know the violence it took to become this gentle” 

Erika: “Do you think God stays in heaven because he, too, lives in fear of what he’s created?” 

Itsuki: “I will seize destiny by the throat and force it into the shape of my choosing” 

Yuri: “God gave me depression because if my ambitions went unchecked I would have bested him in hand-to-hand combat by age 16” 

Hibiki: “Bury me shallow, I’ll be back” 

Kanade: “I hope your gods forgive you because we surely won’t”

Ellen: “I am a monument to all your sins” 

Ako: “The world should have protected you, but you have been asked to protect it. What an honor. What an injustice.”

Miyuki: “There’s no light at the end of this tunnel, so it’s a good thing we brought matches” 

Akane: “If the world chooses to become my enemy, I will fight just like I always have”

Yayoi: “There is not enough time to make all the things one’s imagination can conjure” 

Nao: “All these moments will be lost in time, like tears in the rain” 

Reika: “Kill me and live with the memory. Then tell the stars that you won.” 

Ayumi: “Our paths may have crossed briefly but you still had the misfortune of knowing me” 

Mana: “Whenever you look at another creator or an artist that you respect, you’re only seeing what took them a long time of work and doubt to push through. You never see the struggle behind it. So you think you’re the only one struggling, when in fact, everyone goes through it.” 

Rikka: “Take this gift, for the gods surely won’t” 

Alice: “The anger in your heart warms you now, but will leave you cold in your grave.” 

Makoto: “I’ve been through hell and I’ll come out singing” 

Aguri: “You kneel before my throne unaware that it was born on lies” 

Regina: “What is better: to be born good, or to overcome your evil nature through great effort” 

Megumi: “This is hell’s territory and I am beholden to no gods” 

Hime: “I thought there were no heroes left in the world” 

Yuko: “To feel sorrow is to deserve peace” 

Iona: “God may judge you but his sins outnumber your own” 

Haruka: “All knowledge is ultimately based on that which we cannot prove. Will you fight? Or will you perish like a dog?” 

Minami: “What the fuck is that, ‘act my age’? The ocean is old as fuck, it will still drown your ass with vigor.”

Kirara: “If you don’t like what I’m doing you can try to stop me, but given that not even God has succeeded yet I don’t fancy your odds” 

Twilight: “You are alone, child. There is only darkness for you, and only death for your people. These ancients are just the beginning. I will command a great and terrible army, and we will sail to a billion worlds. We will sail until every light has been extinguished. You are strong, child, but I am beyond strength. I am the end, and I have come for you.” 

(yeah i did twilight instead of towa because this quote is incredibly badass and only fits a villain) 

Mirai: “Do I look like the kind of woman who dies?” 

Liko: “God is dead and soon we will follow” 

Kotoha: “To become god is the loneliest achievement of them all” 

Ichika: “Dude, sucking at something is the first step towards being sort of good at something” 

Himari: “What are you gonna do with that big bat? Gonna hit me? Better make it count. Better make it hurt. Better kill me in one shot.” 

Aoi: “I will face god and walk backwards into hell” 

Yukari: “I’ve heard it said that we only gain wisdom through suffering, and tonight I intend to make you very wise.” 

Akira: “Too many people have opinions on things they know nothing about. And the more ignorant they are, the more opinions they have.”

Ciel: “My body may be a temple but I am the God to whom it is devoted. Do not presume to tell me how I may decorate my altar.” 

Hana: “Violence for violence is the rule of beasts” 

Saaya: “People say ‘phase’ as if impermanence means insignificance. Show me a permanent state of the self.”

Homare: “Do not let my origin story become yours” 

Emiru: “You can’t shake the devil’s hand and say you’re only kidding.” 

Ruru: “One day you’ll decompose and I’ll be there to watch it happen” 

Hikaru: “No curse of mine shall befall you from my dying breath” 

Lala: “Pick a god and pray” 

Elena: “One day you will be face to face with whatever saw fit to let you exist in the universe, and you will have to justify the space you’ve filled” 

Madoka: “My father taught me as a child that if you shoot for the moon and miss, the cold vaccuum of space will suck out your eyeballs. Failure is not an option. Go kill them.” 

Yuni: “What are you going to buy in your lifetime that’s worth more to you than your own humanity” 

Nodoka: “I’ll do whatever you want” “Then perish” 

Chiyu: “You know what they say about healers and poisoners: similar skill set, very different philosophies”. 

Hinata: “The version of me you created in your mind is not my responsibility” 

Asumi: “There is no point being grown up if you can’t be childish sometimes” 

[hysteriapilled]

- 𝙰 𝚁𝙴𝙰𝙳𝙸𝙽𝙶 𝙾𝙽 𝙴𝚁𝙴𝙽 𝙹𝙰𝙴𝙶𝙴𝚁'𝚂 𝙲𝙷𝙰𝚁𝚃 𝙱𝙴𝙲𝙰𝚄𝚂𝙴 𝙸 𝙷𝙰𝚅𝙴 𝙽𝙾𝚃𝙷𝙸𝙽𝙶 𝙴𝙻𝚂𝙴 𝚃𝙾 𝙳𝙾

Keep in mind that this might be inaccurate considering the information given is not canon, but from google. There will be no house readings since I can't even get a hold of his actual birth time so there is no rising sign (This is Eren's chart and how he would be if he were real, so don't take everything as factual)

𝐅𝐈𝐑𝐒𝐓 𝐎𝐅𝐅

Big 5 Analysis

- SUN IN ARIES. Your sun defines your ego, core identity, your authentic self and in my personal opinion it's not really an important placement in the chart, and more of a title basically. People born into Aries are usually perceived as loud, impulsive, raging and aggressive by others— but they're very caring and protective to the ones they love, though sometimes they sure can have bursts of anger. Eren is stubborn, he can't be chained down and refuses to sit back and watch the people he cares about get tossed around. He is a firm person, quick on his feet and rather very rushing, he's like a puppy excited to get his owner running laps around him, he's hyper and motivating; a natural leader. - MOON IN PISCES. Your moon is your emotional side, how you feel, how you perceive feelings and how you process them. Eren with moon in Pisces is definitely not surprising to me— He is dreamy, intuitive, compassionate and he's either too dependable on others or just an overthinker. Though he may not seem like it Eren is very vulnerable and even prone to getting addicted to substances (alcohol, drugs, bad habits etc.) It's not the best placement in my standpoint, as he can get very affected by his surroundings and others. He can't turn a blind eye and NOT take shit to heart and rather stores it inside and holds onto it. He's very empathetic, he feels people's emotions and feels them well, to the point that he himself experiences what they are going through. - MERCURY IN PISCES. Eren has a LOT of Pisces placements so prepare to see a ton of empathy and psychic abilities in his aspects. Your Mercury is how you think, speak and learn. I sense that Eren has really great vulnerability which might not be a good thing, he trusts people too much and rather relies on them for heaps of things, he can be easily manipulated which is why he should refrain from letting everyone in. On the other hand, he is a very dreamy person and gets lost in his imagination at times. He sees the world in another, imaginative lens, and often could find himself daydreaming randomly. I can see that Eren has a hard time letting go of the past and he can even be linked to people in his life he hadn't seen in years. In terms of rational thinking he isn't the best, as he can't distinguish the logical from the emotional which is definitely something he should work on, he gets often blinded by the illusion of his overwhelming emotions toward others. He can also definitely have an eye to art since his imagination is extravagantly wide.

- VENUS IN TAURUS. Your mercury is your idea of love and how you give it and prefer to receive it— Eren's idea of romance is full of sensuality and gifts, he'll spoil you with his utter loyalty and generally with things too. Devotion is daily, he's extremely honest and would rather die than lie to you. Emphasis on sensuality, Eren craves touch and I could sense that his love language is physical touch, he will shower you with affection and fulfill your needs any time of the day. Taurus in Venus are all about comfort and coziness with their lover, so I can see that Eren loves cuddling, massages, food, sleepovers, intimate little things like that strike a chord in his heart. He can be possessive and jealous of times, he hates change specifically big ones in relationships—He can also take a long time to get to know you and prefers taking things slow and steady rather than rushing into it. I can also feel that he loves hard-workers, people who are dedicated and responsible (that's definitely his type). - MARS IN CAPRICORN. Two words. Goal driven. Your Mars is your approach towards anger and impulses as well as your sexuality aspects. Eren is self-controlled and refuses to take orders from others, he can't be chained down not because he's stubborn, but simply because he can't allow himself to stop. He has a tendency to shut out the world to pursue his objective— he moves forward (not a pun) and is willing to fight against everything and everyone to reach his goal, he isn't petty as he considers little quarrels a waste of time and energy. He likes to focus on the big problem at hand, not how to fight and win the battle but how to prepare for conquering the war once and for all. Eren with this placement knows that he is entitled to earn what he works hard for and will not let anything stop him. Mars signs can also affect appearance so I sense that Eren has very prominent and broad cheekbones, a serious face, and a very stiff, steady voice like he's about to command something. It can also be an intimate, velvety and cold voice and on the topic of intimacy— He usually prefers seeing you face to face and rather dislikes social media flings. He comes with a natural inclination to assume a dominant role in bed and he does what doesn't bother him (kink-wise) His temper is so icy, and he could definitely be on the sadomasochism spectrum. He's very soft in nature so if something was bothering you he'd instantly be turned off. Eren can be aggressive and intense but he may not specifically get off on pain (or he may) more like he finds the idea of being in control a very satisfying idea.

𝐒𝐄𝐂𝐎𝐍𝐃 𝐎𝐅𝐅

2. Jupiter, Saturn, Uranus, Neptune & Pluto Analysis

- JUPITER IN AQUARIUS. Your Jupiter is where you can receive the most luck and love, without you really doing much. It’s where you can catapult to happiness and success through quickest routes possible, within reason. I can tell from previous placements that Eren is a firm believer in standing for what you think is right. He is very opinionated and sometimes a bit too much— Some of his beliefs or theories can be brilliant and genius and others quite nonsensical and implausible, he rushes into throwing the first opinion just for the sake of throwing it first. Any analytical work about objective themes would come easily to him. Passion and enthusiasm will come astonishingly fast too as he can actually stun society with his innate knowledge with complicated subjects. Any scientific, technological, or perhaps just general abstract topics will benefit Eren greatly in subtle and/or unsubtle ways. He takes leaps of faith and believes what his eyes cannot see or what his mind cannot grasp. Simply what makes everything work out so well for him is the open minded love he puts into his theories. Sometimes though, he fears judgement people give to his methods as they are sometimes out of the box and peculiar. Eren would have to let go of his attachment to what other people think about his ways on solving or analyzing. - SATURN IN LIBRA. Your Saturn sign is your life’s obstacles and challenges, the rewards that come with time, and the discipline you need to achieve your goals. To start off with friendships, Eren cares about others and is tireless in serving others—he's also prone to putting others before him (others as in the people he cares about) And supporting his moon and mercury Pisces, he is very artistic and helps civilize those who need the lessons. The companionship he seeks can often give him solace and security, with his comrades support he feels a lot more powerful and in self-control. In relationships though Eren may tend to have a bit of an inferiority complex when it comes to relationships and is afraid of rejection & may try to shut himself away or run if the going gets tough. He is very drawn to mentor types, and may often be with someone older and wiser. Despite that he still finds a way to assume the dominant role in the relationship due to his cold nature. Eren commits to artful projects, making it possible to live his dreams by seeing them to completion, he finds it very gratifying and has mental discipline when he finds activities that matches his high ideals. His sense of social justice is heightened, that could get him into law, politics and activism—His firm belief in himself also plays a big role in this, his bravery allows himself to sacrifice whatever he has to, to get the job done. Chaos, crassness, and ugliness can cause him a lot of anxiety and fear, and with his persistence to right the wrong he gets really frustrated when people don't have an outlook to life the same as his. I sense that it may be hard for Eren to accept that only he is able to control himself, and it's a hard pill for him to swallow.

- URANUS IN PISCES. As I mentioned before Eren's chart is dominated with Pisces placements, his intuition works at another wavelength than that of the common people, and for this reason, he is in a much deeper connection to the spirit world. He can sense the occult and this acts as a form of guidance for him, an anchor to support his meanderings through life’s challenges. Pair that up with his splendid imagination and innovative spirit, and you get someone who’s afraid of failure even when he’s not doing anything out of the ordinary, the worst thing that could happen to Eren is failing and losing his sense of validation. He’s a negativist ( I can see Eren as a cynical person later on in life, a realist would fit his philosophical belief) but, he should let his intuition and connection to the spirit world heal this part of his, instead of allowing everything to work against him. He won’t let himself be fooled by naïve ideals, even though he likes believing in them. He can be quite realistic and logical when the situation calls for it and that's quite ironic considering he's indulged in his imagination most of the time. - NEPTUNE IN SAGITTARIUS. This is one hell of a placement. Experimentation with different beliefs, spiritual strands, and esoteric-based teachings are all things Eren finds interest in. He cannot deny the divine existence truly and indefinitely to himself- even if he does so to others, there is always the gnawing sense that ‘there is something more,’ and one day he may regret not finding out what that is. His gift is bringing the joy of shared faith and spirituality together, making the sect he resonates with part of his life’s philosophy. We can tell by now that Eren's purpose is seeking truth, absorbing information and looking at the world in a different lens. - PLUTO IN PISCES. Shawty Bae here can also can be more passive aggressive when trying to get what he wants. This means he can be manipulative at times. This is the only time he ever makes a power play. When he is struggling to achieve something for the greater good. (THIS ACTUALLY RESONATES WITH HIS PLAN) But this desire for control is never executed maliciously. He wants things to go his way so he doesn't disappoint those who are counting on him. Eren can be very sensitive, and it’s important to him that he doesn't let anyone down. He so desperately want to help people that he sometimes sacrifices his health and well being, and even somtimes the well being of others just for the outcome to turn out best.

𝐋𝐀𝐒𝐓𝐋𝐘

3. Chiron (Scar)

- CHIRON IN PISCES. Your Chiron sign in astrology shows where you sustained your deepest wound, your scar— It can never be completely healed, but they can be worked with and transmuted. Eren with Chiron in Pisces, we've already talked about many Pisces qualities in him (empathy, psychic abilities, imagination etc.) But the Chiron has a lot more depth into it, Eren might have a deep fear of being hurt by the universe or the forces at play. He might feel that the world is unfair or merciless and doesn't have his back almost every time. He has a sense of betrayal, and that leads him into cynicism (mentioned before in his Uranus placement) He felt that nobody was there for him when he needed it the most and he also feels a sense of victimization. This placement has a lot to do with the idea of FATE. Even subconsciously Eren feels he was dealt an unfair life, I can also feel that his way of coping is feeling someones grief right alongside them. Sympathyzing is definitely his way of forgetting about his own problems. Even though Eren doesn't exactly victimize himself he still can't understand why the universe is set up this way— he feels that the world isn't fair to him and his loved ones. Although all this scarring shows when he indulges himself in an immense shell of cynicism, then he hops between two places; Not feeling empathy for others since nobody offered empathy to him - or sympathyzing greatly and putting others' needs before his. It is easy for him to shut his feelings out but only with the help of substances which makes him more prone to getting addicted. This placement was created at some point in the past when Eren needed something badly and didn’t get it (sometimes the wound stems from a past life, but this stemmed from his childhood) Maybe it's because he felt insignificant to someone he felt was an idol to him, maybe this figure or idol was never there to nurture him and the probability of him having a lost close one in early childhood days is a very probable cause in how this Chiron stemmed.

BONUS:

- I get massive ISFP vibes from early Eren and INTJ from late him.

- His Venus Taurus makes him very romantic, so I feel like this would be his favorite song to dance to

[redchestnut]

We can be Heroes (just for one day)

Summary:

At the end of the 1960s, the resistance took to the streets of Paradis demanding justice and the fall of the wall Maria.

Loving is a revolutionary act.

AO3 link here

TW: Police Brutality/Gun Violence

(I'm an idiot and completely forgot that it was supposed to be fluff until I was almost finished writing it. The ending is happy though, I promise.)

Written for Levihan Drabble Week (@levihan-drabbles).

Prompt: "Don't you have a country to run?" "My favorite person is in the hospital, the country can wait" "I don't think it works like that." "I run the country, so it does."

-----------------------------------------------------------------

“I can remember

Standing by the wall

And the guns shot above our heads

And we kissed as though nothing could fall”

David Bowie - Heroes

"Don't you have a country to run?"

"My favorite person is in the hospital, the country can wait," replied the man, stubbing out his cigarette and standing from his elegant desk.

"I don't think it works like that," she replied. Her biting tone could barely hide the jealousy that she knew she couldn't feel.

"I run the country, so it does," he spat as he pulled on his jacket.

The woman stopped looking at him and went to the window that covered an entire wall of the large office. “The resistance is gathering strength, Goldwick. The international gaze is on you," she insisted.

"The resistance is nothing more than a bunch of idealists who do not know their place in society and would rather be starving, like the parasites on the other side. And the international union is a joke. They will not get involved unless it suits them." The man paused before opening the door. "And Catt," he called out to her, causing her to turn around, "don't forget that you are only my assistant, not my advisor. You do your job. The police will take care of the radicals. And I'm going to meet my newborn son." The man left slamming the door and leaving her alone. On the other side of the window, the landscape of the Shiganshina square was invaded by smoke. Despite not being able to hear anything, she could imagine the sound of screams of the protest and police sirens. In the background, the wall was imposing. Catt knew it was nothing more than a symbol: the barrier that would prevent ideas from the other side of the world from reaching here. The barrier that would protect the supposed freedom of Paradis from the enemy.

* * *

“We’re born free. All of us. Free. Some don’t believe it, some try to take it away. To hell with them!” The surrounding crowd cheered and shouted.

"Isn't he too young? All of them?" Hange asked Erwin next to her, as they watched Eren who was still speaking through the megaphone. “If they are friends with Levi's cousin, that means none of them have finished school yet.”

"You're right. They are young. But that doesn't mean they don't realize the truth."

"I agree, Erwin, but it's still dangerous. You know the police won't care if they catch them."

Before Erwin could respond, Levi appeared at their side. "The pigs are one block away. They have us surrounded." He said catching his breath.

"But we are hundreds of thousands, what are they planning to do?" Hange asked, annoyance beginning to appear in her voice.

"We will stay." Erwin said without looking at them, making Levi and Hange turn to see him. "We will stay here and wait for what they do. We're both hoping for the same thing. To settle it here once and for all." Levi and Hange looked at each other. Erwin had been the leader of the university movement from the beginning. They both trusted his judgment.

"I'll see if I can find Moblit on the next corner. Maybe we can put up a barricade. Slow down their advance." Hange said, before pushing her way through the crowd. She had barely advanced a few feet when she felt a grip on her arm. She turned around.

"Promise me you'll take care of yourself," Levi asked her without letting go of her arm. Her heart melted. "I promise you, Levi. You too. Don't let them catch you. Okay?" He just nodded once and let her go.

Hange was studying medicine, yet she was mobilized by social justice. This is how she ended up in one of the meetings that Erwin, a senior history student, secretly organized each week.

In the months after, and with the constant arrival of new young people interested in the events and reality of Paradis, Erwin convinced Levi, a young man from the poorest neighborhoods of the capital, to join the movement. Their relationship had been strange from the moment Erwin introduced them. But just like the revolution, the emotions between Levi and Hange exploded suddenly and without warning. In the walks home after the meetings. The quick kisses while they stuck pamphlets on the walls in the dark. The nights of wine and forbidden records that made them forget their reality for a couple of hours. However, no bottle of wine or record lasts forever. They soon discovered that there was no room for relationships and love in the midst of the people's struggle and pain, so they decided to put down their little personal revolution.

The other corner of the big Shiganshina Square was much more crowded than the one next to the wall. Hange searched all directions for the image of her friend and classmate but he was nowhere to be found. She screamed his name, but her voice was lost among the people's chants of "bring down the wall" and the sound of clubs being struck against the shields of the police. It was a warning: chaos would start soon. She could feel it in the air.

"Hange!" Someone pushed her to the ground just before hearing a deafening noise. She turned around and found Moblit's panicked face staring behind her. Someone had thrown a Molotov cocktail just a few feet from her. The police had reacted quickly and were now running into their direction. "Shit. It's already started." Moblit took her hand and started running in the opposite direction.

* * *

Levi froze. The sound of the explosion came from where Hange was supposed to be.

"I should probably get over-there-" the blurry image of something flying past him cut him off immediately. He turned quickly to meet Zeke's gaze across the street. Despite his helmet, he could perfectly identify his hideous beard. In his hands, a riot gun.

"Isn't that your brother? When were you going to tell us he was a cop?" he heard one of his cousin's friends screaming.

"Half-brother," he heard Eren reply. The anger evident in his voice.

"Ah well, my mistake. That doesn't change that he's shooting at us!"

The discussion stopped immediately. A smoke bomb fell just a few meters from them. The crowd started running scared in different directions. Some groups advanced to the front, determined to fight the police, including Eren.

"Mikasa!" Levi screamed as he watched her run after the brat. Another bomb fell near them. This time it was tear gas. Levi started coughing. "Mikasa, come here! Shit" His throat itched so much that it was difficult for him to breathe. The smoke from the previous bomb had mixed with the smoke from the barricades and it was difficult to see around. Everywhere people ran.

"I'll go with them, Levi." Erwin suddenly appeared beside him, his mouth covered by a cloth.

"Fine, but if the police catch them, you go with them too. Forget being the hero of the rebellion."

"I leave that role to you" Erwin replied, uncovering his face only to reveal a small smile. “Go find Hange!”

"Tsk," Levi complained as he watched Erwin climb onto a bench and start haranguing people about devoting their hearts to the cause and resisting. It worked, anyway. More and more people covered their faces and ran to confront the police with rocks and whatever they found at hand.

Levi took the cravat around his neck and covered his mouth. The crowds and chaos in the center of Shiganshina square forced him to advance along the side of the wall. Where the hell is she? The anxiety in his chest made him speed up until he was almost running. His heart was pounding. The sound of gunfire came from the other corner of the square. Fuck . Now he was running.

And between the panic, the worry for his cousin and his friend, the uncertainty of the future, the danger of the situation, the pain in his muscles and the adrenaline, he thought of her eyes.

And he thought of her hair and her hands and her lips.

And he realized that he had never told her that he loved her.

And he realized that they might never get justice despite fighting their whole life. That perhaps the dictator could never be defeated. Perhaps the system was like that. That maybe the poor would always be poor. And that life was cruel.

And he realized that somehow he could accept all of that. But he could not accept, under any conditions, give up what he felt for her.

His legs stopped. In the distance, Hange was on her knees helping a woman covering her face with a handkerchief, and urging her to calm her breathing.

Levi yelled her name. She turned quickly and her eyes met his. Levi saw her speaking to Moblit, who took her place assisting the woman.

Hange got up and stared at him. In the distance the sound of two explosions filled the air. The smoke increased more and more. People kept running. The screams were mixed with the sound of the sirens and the shots did not stop on either front. Despite that, Levi thought the image was beautiful. Hange shrugged and gave him a resigned half smile. Levi's heart raced again before advancing on her. Hange did the same until they finally met halfway.

"I was so worried about you-" Hange was immediately interrupted by Levi, who grabbed her hair and pulled her close to his face. The kiss they shared seemed to slow down everything around them. The chaos was suddenly nothing more than a slow motion nebula.

"I love you!" Levi screamed once they parted, amid all the noise. "Did you hear me, Hange? I want you to know that I fucking love you!"

Before she could answer, a stream of water soaked them. A water cannon had reached the center of the square and was trying to disperse the crowd.

Hange laughed out loud as Levi brushed his wet hair from his face. "I love you too, Levi Ackerman!" she shouted out before wrapping her arms around his neck and kissing him passionately.

* * *

In the distance, Catt could see a young couple kissing next to the wall amid the chaos. In her hand, a fax said that General Goldwick, president of Paradis, had just been forced to abdicate, calling for early elections. Parliament, for its part, had announced the demolition of the wall.

Despite sharing different ideals, she smiled.

"To be young and not a revolutionary is a biological contradiction"

Salvador Allende (1908-1973)

[moonlitdiane]

Hello! I moved from my old blog, @dianethus​ to here, you can probably call this a re-intro!

Diane | 18 | Filipino-Chinese | She/They | Pansexual | Scorpio | xNTP | Neurodivergent | Psychology Major | Graphic Designer | Practicing Wiccan

I’ve been trying to write since I was around 12 years old with silly little k-pop and percy jackson fanfics. Even though I cringe now whenever I think about the things I wrote, I still believe it was a necessary phase that all writers have to go through to become better.

I mainly write for the #OwnVoice movement that focuses on the South East Asian experience and especially the experience of being queer in an Asian environment. I aim to give the queers of Asian history whose stories never got to be told a voice. I write to expose the world to Philippine Mythology and the stories passed down from ancestor to ancestor. I also aim to conjure up nostalgic imagery in the readers' minds.

low fantasy. I'm not that really good at world building but I'm in love with the idea of everyday magic.

supernatural.

historical.

angst. I'm SORRY but writing and describing pain is a different kind of joy for me.

found family. I'm gay.

cosmic motifs.

enemies to lovers. oh for someone to see all my worst parts and still fall in love with me. also consider: childhood friends to enemies to lovers.

religious trauma & guilt. I went to a catholic school what did you expect?

The Revolution Will Not Be Vilified.

Evil Is Sexy.

Trapped In Another World. I want to be Isekai-d so bad.

Song Fic. Most of my titles are actually song lyrics or my basic outlines follow the structure of a song.

“Slender Aphrodite has overcome me with longing for a girl,”

Somewhere In Limasawa Street is a queer historical fiction story set in 1898 when the Philippine-American war is just beyond the horizons and 19 year old mestiza, Lucena Candella is in the middle of a war with herself. Sheltered and painfully aloof, she meets brave but brash, Urduja Kalangitan, who is as emotionally aware as a rock and who happens to be the Revolutionary Army's best gunman—maybe that's what pulled quiet Lucena to her.

Between paper planes, porcelains, and battle scars, Lucena slowly learns to love, and that scared her. It scared her because she wasn't allowed to love that woman with the scarred smile and wild hair.

This is my main WIP and my passion project. I really wanted to write something that I can dedicate to the queers of history, the indigenous and people of color whose queerness is never told.

The title is a reference to Limasawa Street by folk pop band, Ben&Ben, I actually used the album and a few singles as inspiration for the plot. 

WIP Playlist. This story will be unapologetically Filipino.

“Be angry but do not sin; do not let the sun go down on your anger, and do not make room for the devil,”

The Devil’s Choir is a low fantasy story following the adventures of seven unlikely friends who just want to go apeshit and run away from their shitty town. That is until they’re thrown into a you-need-to-save-the-whole-world mess without their written consent. Lucifer and Dionysus show up at their door step, dragging them head first into an abyss that even the Gods refuse to fall into. A war between the golden age and the future, it’s now up to this peculiar gang to save the world from the real threat.

The seven deadly sins but make them moody teenagers. this story has gone through so much revising for years! Found family, enemies to lovers, and unwilling heroes? check.

Unintentionally a copy of American Gods. It was too late until I realized the plot was kind of similar to American Gods. Help. 

WIP Playlist. I smell chaos, don’t you?

“It is true, we shall be monsters, cut off from all the world; but on that account we shall be more attached to one another.”

Manila Encounters is a paranormal urban fantasy story unfolding right in the pearl of the orient seas. When the clock strikes 3 AM and the lights of the skyscrapers turn dark—when the city sleeps, the monsters roam free. Deep between the alley ways of Manila city, look out for kids with a certain glow and bite behind their smiles. Look for the ones with sunkissed tans who speak in tongues. Look for the ones whose feet barely dip into murky bay waters and fingertips grazing moonlight. 

A dummy’s guide to Filipino folklore. Manila Encounters was inspired by a hashtag on Twitter of the same name where people wrote their own twist to Filipino urban legends and folk stories.

Oh great, another Percy Jackson rip-off. the main characters are demi-gods or descendants of Gods. Original, I know.

WIP Playlist. driving at midnight sort of vibe.

"You may forget but let me tell you this: someone in some future time will think of us."

And I Love her is a queer romance story about a girl who just recently moved into an old but well maintained cottage in some seaside town in Europe—and she finds in the middle of dusty furniture and underneath cobwebs, a rotary telephone sitting there unused for decades. It rings unexpectedly one day and what greets her is a soft voice belonging to someone who lived 60 years ago.

a dreamnotfound fanfic inspired this. and the South Korean horror film, The Call. 

gay yearning agenda. so much yearning. so much. I’m projecting.

WIP Playlist. My pain fits in the palm of your freezing hand, taking mine, but it's been promised to another

A selected list of fics from my AO3 account. It’s gay.

I drowned a long time ago. Sakusa Kiyoomi isn’t in love. He’s devoted. Serial Killer AU.

Maaaring bang magkunwaring akin ka pa? A Tagalog Haikyuu fic based on the movie, Camp Sawi.

Marupok na puso ko. A Tagalog Haikyuu fic where they do the Filipino thing and get drunk.

My good puppy. My first try at writing smut. Jesus Christ.

Be my mistake. Where Kuroo Tetsurou calls up Tsukishima Kei one last time.

Make it hurt. The two times Atsumu Miya saw the entire universe behind Sakusa Kiyoomi’s eyes.

I still have a lot of stories that I hope to finish, I find it hard to discard or erase story ideas. So I hope one day, you can all watch me finish this list.

We Don’t Belong Here / Viva La Filipinas / Luna De Sangre Conspiracy / Lilith and Lysander’s Guide To Immortal Godparents / Lonely Hearts Club / A Lady’s Guide to Princes and Principles / Attack Block / Empty Thrones /  A Double Take / Stupid Cupid / Idle Town / Alice? / The 30 Day Deal / Lost Stars / The Apocalypse Program / Heartstrings  / Disastrously Danae

[watch-grok-brainrot]

Jin Guangyao's Violation of 忠孝仁义

So I had written about WWX and his strong sense of 忠孝仁义 last week. While I was writing it, I kept on thinking about JGY and how he managed to violate all of these virtues. I wanted to go into this characterization of him because I find it so interesting how opposite he is to WWX in the decisions he made. (Warning: i’m not nice to JGY here so if you don’t want him dragged, don’t read?)

忠- loyalty, devotion, fidelity (usually for country or monarch)

(Can I take a moment to talk about how much I LOVE THIS SHOT?! The blood of WRH on the camera lens, WRH falling over, the sudden shift to brightness that mirrors the scene in ep 50 where JGY obscures the sun in his bow (picture above the read more cut)! I can’t get over how much I LOVE the lighting and the way WRH collapses, making way for JGY to become the new sun. Foreshadowing much CQL Crew?!)

This one might be a stretch depending on how you read JGY. I fully believe he went to work for Wen Ruohan as Wen Zhuliu did -- seeking someone who will value his skills. However, WZL died for WRH and JGY just bided his time. (Note: While we know very little about Wen Zhuliu, we know he was at least 忠 and 义. He died for WRH and Wen Chao and refused to let WC desecrate Jiang Fengmian and Yu Ziyuan’s bodies. For that, I have to give him respect. He, despite everything, still had that jianghu sense of 义. Also, the man can count. And knows what a golden core feels like.)

So we know JGY gave Lan Xichen the maps, but he also lured them to Nightless City where the puppets were waiting. Had WWX not brought out the Stygian Tiger Amulet, would JGY have murdered WRH? Or would he have stayed in the shadows forever? As a viewer I have no idea what JGY is thinking, what he’s doing, or what he’s hoping for. He hides so well his intentions that there is debate about if he really was helping with the Sunshot Campaign or not! That isn’t something you can say about someone with loyalty. 

What upsets me further is that Nie Mingjie, having been JGY’s superior officer, sees JGY more clearly than LXC can. NMJ has seen JGY murder and has seen the level of self-serving vindictiveness JGY is capable of. In the case of the Sunshot Campaign, this self-serving attitude made JGY become a double agent uncommitted to either side. Too bad NMJ could not convince LXC of JGY’s duplicity. I’m gonna blame those dimples. 

The fact that we do not know JGY’s intent really shows his lack of 忠. If You Stand For Nothing, JGY, What Will You Fall For? (Answer: Himself and that is not 忠)

孝 - filial piety (deference to your lineage)

So for 孝, you’re supposed to respect your parents, honor your parents, and defer to your parents. What are you not supposed to do? Kill you father. That’s what.

So this should’ve been a really short section because that’s pretty cut and dry. But I want to look at what JGY says to JGS when JGY brings in Sisi and the other women. 

(He’s so creepy in this picture! *shudders*)

“父亲,我给你找来了你最爱的女人. 有很多个. 你高兴吗?”

“Father, I have brought you your favorite -- women. There are many. Are you happy?”

(Translation note: you can translate the line as your favorite women or your favorite -- women. I chose to translate it as the latter due to the context.)

First of all, the tone. JGY’s voice is breathy. I can almost hear a smile. He has zero moral qualms about this. He addresses his father as father, not dad or anything close. But he does acknowledge that relationship. And then he says he’s brought JGS’s favorite. There’s a slight emphasis on the favorite there. And it’s creepy. JGY adds the next line and goose bumps start to form on my skin. He knows his father’s sins and he’s punishing his father with it. Why are you doing this JGY?! And at the end, when it asks “Are you happy?” his voice is so sinister I want to scream. JGY clearly knows what he’s doing. He knows exactly what it means to be 孝 and chooses to make a mockery of 孝, to make a mockery of his father, and to kill his father. 

And then, after he watches JGS die, he tells Sisi and the other women to continue -- to desecrate JGS’s body. This is about as un-孝 as one can get! Remember, WWX and JC were willing to die to get JFM and YZY’s bodies back so they could be cremated and honored. The difference here is night and day! Yes, JGY was very good to his mother, including building a Guanyin Statue in her likeness and sparing Sisi who was a friend of his mother’s, but I cannot get over how much of an abomination he was toward JGS (even if JGS deserved an awful death).

仁 - benevolence, humanity, love of man

JGY has no 仁. Does JGY love anyone other than himself? Maybe his mom. (He might have some 仁 towards Su Sh*t She but that’s only suggested by the last couple of episodes.) That’s really it. He might have loved Jin Ling as his nephew. He might have loved LXC for LXC’s kindness and brotherhood. He might have loved Qin Su as whatever relationship he thinks they had. But when push comes to shove, JGY has zero benevolence towards anyone. He’s willing to kill Qin Su, take Jin Ling hostage, and take LXC hostage. (He also has no 义 but that’s the next section!)

And there’s ep 23. When LXC, JGS, and NMJ were discussing what to do with the Wens,  JGY suggested the Wens be imprisoned at QiongQi Path. Since WRH had ordered the slaughter of multiple clans, including the Jiangs at Lotus Pier, doing the same to him would not be considered unreasonable. Ruthless, yes, but a good show of might and order. This acceptance of murder is due to the concept of 诛九族. 诛九族 (zhū jiǔ zú) is one of the most severe punishments in ancient China. The character breakdown makes it fairly self explanatory:

诛 - to execute, kill, put to death

九 - nine

族 - family, clan,ethnic group, or tribe

诛九族 condemns you and your entire family to death (Depending on the source, some say it’s you + 8 types of relatives. Some say it’s everyone related to you from 4 generations above to 4 generations below).

By suggesting the Wen remnants be imprisoned and not slaughtered, JGY presented himself as 仁. However, by turning around and slaughtering the people per JGS’s wishes, JGY knowingly chose the immoral path where blood flowed like rivers. 

(Also! The way this shot pans down makes me think about how JGY is descending into a hell of his own making...)

义-  righteousness and code of brotherhood

Good god, 义. I have so many feelings about 义. Let’s start with some history because CONTEXT is so important. So when you ask a chinese person on the street to give you an example of 义, I’m willing to bet one of the most common answers you will get is 桃园结义 (tao yuan jie yi, or peach garden/grove establishment of brotherhood). This is THE story of fraternal love between non-blood related men. 

So quick and dirty synopsis of 桃园结义 and the three kingdoms story (I actually haven’t read it and it’s been a while since I actually tried to figure out the plot… so hopefully this is all correct!). Three men (刘备、关羽、张飞/ Liu Bei, Guan Yu, Zhang Fei) met on the streets, fought each other, became besties, and decided to start a rebellion. They took over one third of the country with the oldest (刘备) being the monarch and the other two working at his side (a little Yunmeng bros feel there, right? You’ll be the leader, I’ll be your right hand man). And they died for each other. 关羽 was the first to go. To seek revenge, 张飞 worked his men to the rebellion. Two of 张飞’s subordinates ultimately decapitated him while he was sleeping and brought it to their enemy. 张飞’s head and body are buried in two different cities in China (doesn’t this make you think of NMJ’s fate? Because it did when I was thinking about this and I wanted to cry. Also, 张飞 started out as a butcher. SERIOUSLY CQL/MDZS, can we pretend to be SUBTLE!?). 刘备 continued seeking revenge. Prior to 关羽’s death, the three kingdoms were in semi-equilibrium where the two smaller ones were allied against the larger. However, 关羽 being killed by their kinda-ally destroyed the delicate balance between the three kingdoms. 刘备 could’ve tried to make peace but he wasn’t going to let his sworn brother’s murder go unavenged. They all died in the end but with honor and brotherhood intact. 刘备 and 张飞’s determination to avenge 关羽’s death epitomizes the virtue of 义. They are willing to die for eachother. 

In CQL the parallelism to the 桃园结义 imagery is obvious to anyone who has a cultural background that screams Romance of Three Kingdoms at you. Let’s take a look, ok?  

A quick Google image search yields these images (I couldn’t choose): 

You know what they look like? This (from ep 40): 

You know what 桃园结义 looks like when mainland China made a live action? This: 

And you know what that reminds me of in CQL (ep 23)? 

Are you freaking out now about the visual parallels? Ok. Good. Because we’re moving onto a tiny bit of text comparison because i’m excited and i can. 

Per Romance of Three Kingdoms (note: historically inspired novel, not history), 刘备、关羽、张飞 swore the following oath: 

“念刘备、关羽、张飞，

Hope that Liu Bei, Guan Yu, Zhang Fei

虽然异姓，既结为兄弟，

Even though we have different last names,since we have sworn to be brothers

则同心协力，救困扶危；

Then let us unite our hearts and efforts towards helping the needy

上报国家，下安黎庶。

Repaying our country, bringing peace to the people.

不求同年同月同日生，

We do not ask to be born on the same day of the same month of the same year

只愿同年同月同日死。

But hope to die on the same day of the same month of the same year

皇天后土，实鉴此心，

Heaven and earth, verify our hearts

背义忘恩，天人共戮！”

If we turn our backs to righteousness and forget charity, may we be slaughtered by all. 

Now, let’s look at the oath said by the 3zun:

“神明在上。

Brilliant gods above, 

今日我兄弟三人在此立下重誓，

Today, we three brothers swear a solemn oath here 

上报仙门，下安黎庶 ， 

To repay our cultivation sects, To bring peace to the people.

天地同证，如有异心，

Heaven and earth be our witnesses. If we become disloyal, 

千夫所指，天人共怒”

May a thousand men point their fingers at us and may we be incite the anger of all

Even some of the wording is verbatim. The parts I bolded are what I was excited by since they’re either parallel or verbatim. 

The first set of lines: 上报国家，下安黎庶 and 上报仙门，下安黎庶 . (Remember when I guessed in my WWX post that since there are no countries, the cultivation sects are the target of 忠? This is my proof that I was right!) My hubris aside, this is the part of their oath where they swear to be both 忠 and 仁 together. The wording is verbatim except for the part that doesn’t apply to the CQL universe! 

The second set of lines: 天人共戮 vs 天人共怒. The sentence/phrase format and message is identical-- betray this oath and incur wrath.  (I can’t help but headcanon NMJ wanted to say 天人共戮 because it’s so much more metal but JGY was like, that’s really severe and convinced LXC to side with him to get it changed.)

Even the structure of the oaths are similar. Both oaths start with an introduction (we are three who want to be brothers), both oaths ask the heaven and earth to see them (Heaven and earth, verify our hearts & heaven and earth be our witnesses), and both oaths call upon the wrath of the people for vindication in case of betrayal. The CQL version is an abridged version of the three kingdoms oath and the writers set that up along with all the imagery because they want us to be constantly thinking about the three kingdoms bros and their amazing “even after death we’re still brothers” sense of 义.  They want us to compare JGY’s 义 with that 义 and find JGY lacking. 

The obvious betrayal of 义 is NMJ’s death.  Not only is JGY the cause of NMJ’s death, he butchers (i’m cringing at my own pun... but it’s so accurate) NMJ’s body so that NMJ’s spirit cannot rest. 

But, to me, what JGY does to LXC is betrayal on par with what he does to NMJ (and not dissimilar to what Xue Yang does to Xiao Xingchen). As we went over in the section about 仁, JGY says one thing so that LXC suggest JGY handles the matter. When everyone leaves, JGY does the un-仁 thing, essentially with LXC’s blessing. JGY kills NMJ but he does it by asking LXC to teach him how to play guqin. LXC becomes an unknowing accomplice (like XXC who becomes the killer of tongueless victims of corpse poison). 

So remember in my WWX post how I said WWX took on what he perceived as JC’s debts so JC doesn’t end up 不仁不义? JGY says one thing and does another in front of LXC. He knows LXC cares deeply about being righteous and kind. He knows LXC wants to do good. And he leads LXC down a path of self doubt and regret. LXC ends up teaching JGY the techniques that kill NMJ. LXC lets JGY handle the Wen remnants. Thus, unlike WWX who tries to absolve JC, JGY intentionally puts LXC into the position of 不仁不义. 

Can WWX and JGY be more diametrically opposed (foes)?

[chicken-scratch-writing]

:0 💍 + Sylvix

///I am SO sorry I completely forgot about this until just now but here it is!///

Sylvix Wedding

Where they get married

-I feel Felix and Sylvain would like to get married somewhere that doesn’t have a crowd

-Or anything like that

-Though it was mainly Felix’s idea

-Sylvain really likes it too

-They would get married in an apple orchard, if they could.

When they get married

-They would get married in Autumn

-Not too hot, not too cold

-AND going off the apple orchard

-Apples

-That’s it

-That’s the main reason

What traditions they include

-They include some of them, but not all

-Ashe gets looped into being the flower girl

-They have a nice wedding cake that isn’t too sweet

-They do ‘tie the knot’ during the ceremony

-They wear something blue

-They would most likely go on a Honeymoon!

-Bouquet and bouquet toss for sure!

-And the rings of course!

What their wedding cake looks like

-Nice n simple but gets the point across!

Who smashes the cake in who’s face

-Felix smashes it in Sylvain’s face

-No one is surprised

Who proposes first

-Felix and Sylvain would probably at the same time

-Partially because he wants to beat Sylvain to it

-Felix proposes with a sword

-And a ring but sword too

who walks down the aisle and who waits at the altar 

-They both walk down the aisle in a line thingy?

-Sylvain first, then Felix

What their outfits look like

-Sylvain convinces Felix to wear a dress

-And by convince, I mean he didn’t get a suit for him and got a dress and didn’t tell him until they wouldn’t be able to return it

-Sylvain almost wore a dress, but ends up wearing a suit

Wedding color scheme/ decorations

-Swords. 

-Enough said.

-And for color scheme it would most likely be a navy blue

What flowers are in the bouquet?

-Chrysanthemum, red (Means: I love you)

-Heliotrope (Means: Eternal love, devotion)

-Hydrangea (Means: Gratitude for being understood) (was chosen by Sylvain specifically)

- AAAND Myrtle (Means: Good luck and love in a marriage)

What are their vows?

-Sylvain went for poetry, and Felix was planning on doing the same

-But Felix pulls a blank, and instead improvises

If anyone’s late to the wedding

-Annette and Merdeses are, because they were the ones baking the cake, and the first time they tried to bring it over, Annette accidentally tripped and dropped it…

-...whoops

Who’s in the bridal party/groomsmen/other

-The rest of the blue lions!

-Felix didn’t even pick a fight with Dimitri or Dedue

-Which is really surprising actually

What the bridal party/groomsmen/other are wearing

-They wear pretty much any navy blue outfit they had

-They got told to *not* go out and buy something for the wedding, so it’s a bit mismatched

Who gives speeches/ what are they?

-Ingrid!!

-She tells of all the shit they do, but also some sweet stories!

Who catches the bouquet? 

-Honestly, Annette’s probably one of the only ones who would try to catch it, though there’s a chance it’s going to land in someone’s face and they catch it to try to stop it from doing that

-there’s a 50/50 chance that someone is Ashe or Dimitri

-Which results in screaming and laughing either way

What are their wedding photo’s like?

-They are a mix of nice and sweet, like holding hands under an apple tree, and utter chaos

-You know how hard it is to take a photo of a cat?

-Felix is like that in some of them

What sort of food do they have at the reception?

-Not a whole lot of sweets, although there are some treats

-Mostly spicy or savory dishes

- s t e a k k k k 

Who cries first during the ceremony?

-If rodrigue is alive , rodrigue

-Felix just glares at him

How wild does the reception get?

-...

-hoo boy

-some of sylvain’s salty exes came and tried to steal the punch

- and felix went and tried to stab them with a stick from off the ground

- and just some other festivities

What their rings are like

-pretty simple

-put also get the point across of “hey I’m married don’t fuck with me”

What sort of favors they have

-swords

-what did you think?

-they also have some mini wine or champagne bottles

-but felix is more happy about the swords

Where they go for their honeymoon

-somewhere peaceful in either gautier or fraldarius territory

-though they might want to go further, maybe to alliance territory

-they decide to stay close, just on the off chance something happens

Something memorable that happens

-Margrave Gautier points out Sylvain can’t reproduce with a man

-of course that angered everyone

-and Mercedes cusses him out

-that shut everyone up

Who officiates the ceremony?

-Seteth!

-Flayn’s there as well, and is quite happy for the couple

What song their first dance is to

-An old Fodlandish folk song that they used to like to dance to as kids

Who gives who away as they walk down the aisle

- Felix ends up walking down the aisle

-And after Rodrige convinces Felix a lot, he eventually caves and lets him walk him down the aisle