#something something about Carlos trying to prove that he’ll be a good husband just like he wants to be a good son and a good cop etc etc

[strandnreyes]

something about 4x08 when at the beginning of the episode, Carlos says to Owen that he thought he’d surprise ‘your son’ with lunch. and then at the end of the episode, Owen says that Carlos will take great care of TK.

saying ‘your son’ is so different than just saying TK. It’s like… he’s your child but look at me I’m bringing him lunch and I’m going to feed him and love him and take care of him I promise

[peralta-guaranteed]

Idk if u already wrote or if there's something out there I've missed, but would totally love to read something from Victor's pov about Jake dating Amy. We all know Amy is daddy's little girl (I would dare to say Amy tries more to prove the amazing women she is to her mother rather than her father) and I think Victor gets to like Jake in spite of all the binder thing, like how he welcomes him into the family and talks to him at the hospital in Two Turkeys, is just so nice. Sure Jake is not what any Santiago would have expected and wanted for Amy but he knows with Jake his little girl is safe and loved in a way no one even with a 'perfect guy binder' would.

(this got long and rambly)

He’s no good. There’s a binder full of proof, and Victor is glad to show it to anyone who so much as mentions his daughter’s new boyfriend. (Even Camila, who’s on his side with this, seems bored of it by now.)

A childish, unprofessional, unreliable, chaotic mess of a person. He shouldn’t even be working on the same level as his daughter - he remembers her complaints and rants about him when she started at her new precinct well enough, trying to comfort her during their phonecalls when she was working hard to settle into her new role as a detective. Maybe he made a mistake then, urging her to be friendly with her new co-workers even while keeping a professional distance. He should’ve told her to focus on work itself, on getting her career goals done, rather than shmoozing with the others. Then she might’ve not befriended that bumbling buffoon of a boy.

-*-

She stayed friends with him even when she’d found someone far more suitable in that Tedford boy, and Victor could tell from the hesitation in her voice and her flickering eyes when she mentioned him during her visits home that there was something off about her, the way the name Jake came to her so much easier and with more joy than the name Teddy in all her stories.

Jake was in a lot of her stories.

Teddy was not.

-*-

He’s not good enough for her. Sure, she’s on his side in this fight - she’s defied her father for less things, and is not afraid to fight for her stance. He knows that well enough from her teenage years, and has been surprisingly proud about it later on, seeing the headstrong, confident woman they’d raised right.

But in this case, just this once, he wishes she could see his reasoning.

He’s not good enough for her. He won’t be able to support her in her ambitions, he won’t be the kind of person she needs to rely on if she wants to make it to captain while maintaining a good homelife like she’d written down in her lifeplan.

Yet she loves him. That’s what she said, in no uncertain times, when she invited her father down to visit and meet with Jake. She loves this boy, and there is a tone to the way she says it that Victor has never heard before. It scares him a little, to think about that tone while seeing this overgrown child bumble around next to her. It sounds so final. It sounds like forever.

-*-

He’s trying. He sticks close to Amy when they’re with her family, looks for her nod or a squeeze of his arm before starting into one of his stories. He’s learned a few phrases in Spanish, in the worst accent Victor has ever heard, but he’s learned them.

(Teddy had been taking Latin classes, instead. “It’s more useful for law proceedings”, Amy had said, and it had seemed logical, but he’d heard the sadness. As much as he’d heard the joy in her giggle when Jake whispered ‘mi amada’ to her when he thought they were alone in Camila’s kitchen.)

-*-

He needs to be better. Victor tries hard, in his arguments with Camila and his sons, who all seem to have fallen to the wrong side in that fight, to explain just what he means by that. Jake has no savings, no proper plans for the future, no interest in grown-up topics. It might do for a casual boyfriend, but it won’t do for the partner of a Santiago - for the partner of the most ambitious Santiago of them all, for his little conquering princess.

He needs to be better.

“Just wait and see.” Matteo says after another disgruntled rant over a shared bottle of beer. “He might surprise you yet. He’s managed that with all of us.”

-*-

He can be surprisingly quiet. That endlessly blabbing mouth (page 6 of tab 4 in his binder) is well and truly shut as they sit with Amy’s tio, frail and shaking in his beloved armchair on what they all know is one of their last visits.

He listens instead, nods fervently when Amy translates the old man’s advice to him - Victor wants to interject for a second to mention that tio Carlos’ tips about marriage life do not apply to them, but he turns just as quiet as Jake when he sees his daughter reach for his hand, as she translates the importance of ‘honestidad’ and ‘comodidad’. Turns even more quiet when he sees Jake turn to grab her hand, squeeze it a few times and smile at her tio.

He’s quiet again a month later, at the funeral, his hand holding Amy’s just as tight as she says goodbye, quiet as he pulls her into a half-hug to soften her sob when the casket disappears into the ground.

“Comodidad.” He whispers to her during the dinner after, and she smiles for the first time that day.

“Consuelo in this case, babe.”

“Sorry.”

“No, you’re getting better.”

-*-

He’s doing good. They’ve fought their way through a lot, through more things than Victor would‘ve ever wanted to put on his little girl, but they’ve fought through it. Together. 

A few pages of the binder have been amended. Some have been ripped out. Things are changing, and so is Jake. He’s growing.

He’s doing good.

-*-

He picks up the next time Victor calls for his weekly chat with his little girl.

“Hello, sir.” And his voice is nervous like it always is when speaking to him, but it’s also quiet, hushed. “Amy’s pretty sick, I don’t think she’s up for a phonecall. I finally got her down for a nap.”

“Amy rarely gets sick. Has she seen a doctor yet?”

“Rosa checked her, it’s just a really heavy cold. I got her medicine and those herbal bath salts and the good tea, so she’ll probably be up and running in a few days.”

“You’re taking good care of her, then.”

“I try, sir.”

“No.” Victor says as he eyes the binder on top of his office shelf, dusty and almost forgotten. “You don’t try. You do.”

-*-

He’s... gone.

A few weeks ago, he was making a mess while trying to help Camila in the kitchen, talking endlessly about the amazing new task force he and his colleague Diaz had gotten into. Grinning at Amy as she beamed with pride when Victor complimented him on that achievement in his career.

And now he was gone, locked away on the other end of the country.

Amy had spent the week after at theirs, crying into the pillows on her childhood bed, never alone as a rotation of brothers kept her company in silence. He’d driven her back home with reluctance, but she wanted to go back to work - back to the case, a binder dedicated to any and all options she could find already in her luggage.

Victor had to leave her behind with nothing but a long, comforting dad-hug. Leave her in that apartment full of him, in every corner, the way he’d made a home in every crevice of her heart too.

“I guess you’re happy now.” Benedict, their youngest - the rebel without a cause - scoffs at the quiet dinner later, two chairs empty.

“Why would you-” Victor wants to scold him, but Camila’s low voice interrupts him.

“Amelia will not leave him for this. Not for anything.”

“No.” Matteo nods.

“And she shouldn’t.” Victor adds as he stabs a potato maybe a bit too harshly. 15 years, he thinks. More than three times of what they’d had together, before. But it makes no difference - 5 days, 5 years, or 15 - Amy wouldn’t care. “He’s more than good enough to wait for.”

-*-

Victor replays the voicemail on his cellphone for the sixth time that evening, as Camily next to him sighs, trying to get him to finally settle down into bed.

I'm calling to inform you that I plan to ask your daughter to marry me, but since it's 2017, I am not asking you for your permission...

Jake still sounds as scared as he always does talking to him, but there’s something else too. Something he’s heard a lot in his voice before, when he was talking to Amy, mostly. Something he’s heard from her, too, since the beginning. Since “I love him, dad. I really do”.

She's a strong independent woman, and she don't need no man. That being said, I truly hope she says yes.

“I’m as excited as you are, cariño.” Camila sighs again. “But we will get the news as soon as it happens, so please go to sleep now.”

“He’s a good man.” Victor says as he finally puts his phone on the bedside table, next to the finished crossword.

“Yes, mi amor. You’ve said that before.”

“He’ll be a good husband.”

[afoolsingenuity]

Bite Sized Books // A Mish Mash of ARCs I’ve Read During My Blogging Slump

I figured a return to blogging should include a little catch up (and an attempt to get my Netgalley shelf back under control). As such, we have a few actual bite sized reviews (because I acknowledge I have a habit of rambling in even my shorter reviews). There is no theme, literally a mish-mash of books I should have reviewed for the past 2 months. I have a couple more to come and then I might talk about my bookish highlights from the past couple of months because I’ve read some awesome books lately (although these ARC reviews might make it seem like I haven’t).

From Duke Till Dawn (The London Underground #1) – Eva Leigh Published: 26th July 2018 Source: Netgalley Genre: Historical Romance My Rating: DNF 20%

Eva Leigh launches a seductive new series that sizzles with the dark secrets of London’s underworld…

‘It’s not my habit to seduce impoverished widows…’

The Duke of Greyland lost his heart – and a princely sum – to a charming, beautiful and destitute widow who, after one passionate night, vanished without a trace. Cassandra Blair grew up on the city streets, picking pockets to survive. Greyland was a rich mark – to be fleeced and forgotten – only she’d never forgotten him.

Years later, chance brings them together again, in a London gaming hell. Grayland is desperate to have her… never suspecting everything about his lover was a lie. But finding herself in dire financial straits, at risk of losing everything, Cassandra has no choice but to beg the man she betrayed for help.

The proud Duke will assist her under one condition: she doesn’t leave his sight until her debts are paid! But can the real Cassandra – the smart, streetwise survivor – steal his heart all over again?

Book one in the Scandalous Ladies of London series

Let’s begin with a DNF (or two). I thought this would be a fun read of a Duke meeting with the woman who scammed him and forcing her to stay with him until her debts are paid. I obviously should have read the summary much more closely as it does say he never suspects his lover of a single night scammed him. Well, his naivete and how utterly gullible he was pissed me right off. He was annoying and a wet blanket to be honest. I didn’t like him one jot. He was boring. So I began reading this book of a woman who scammed a man over one night and then left him with no intention of seeing him again and whilst I probably would have grown to like her (have to respect a woman who is making it on her own scamming the rich) I didn’t ever get to know her because boring mc-boringpants The Duke of Greyland was the one whose perspective you had at the start and he just gradually pissed me off by being an utter idiot so I DNF-ed before the book actually made me angry.

Does it count that I liked the idea at least?

The Proposal (The Weddings Date #2) – Jasmine Guillory

Published: 30th October 2018

Source: Netgalley

Genre: Contemporary, Romance

My Rating: DNF 20%

When Nik Paterson went to the Dodgers game with her C-list actor boyfriend, Ford, for his birthday, she expected nothing more than a few boring hours with him and his bros. She certainly didn't expect a Jumbotron proposal. Or her name to be misspelled. Or to go viral in minutes...

Carlos Ibarra wants to hang out with his sister, catch a Dodgers game, and relax for once. But when a camera crew descends on Nik after the disastrous proposal, he has to rescue her. After they flee the stadium, he delivers her into the arms of her supportive girlfriends, and they both think they'll never see each other again.

Fate has other plans. Nik and Carlos keep crossing paths, accidentally and on purpose. When they finally give in to their attraction to each other, they are on the same page: sex and nothing more. But the proposed friends-with-benefits relationship is turning into something more, and the pair have to decide if they have room in their lives for love.

DNF number 2 was an upsetting one for me. I’d seen other bloggers review and although I hadn’t seen any 5-star reviews I had seen positive ones. Sure, people’s small criticisms did raise a few red flags for me, but just to go in wary. Sadly, I think my opinions may have been coloured by those other bloggers… or I am just less willing to put up with books I’m not behind 100%. Whatever happened I ended up not clicking with this book.

Carlos, we met in The Wedding Date and I was interested to see his story and so when we’re introduced to Nik I was excited. Nik seemed like she would be sassy and fun… but I just didn’t feel a spark between the two when I was reading. The chemistry wasn’t there for me so I didn’t feel invested in the path of them getting together. I mean, this is a term normally reserved for several YA books I've read, but it felt a little insta-lovey. I in no way believed the spark that apparently existed. I know in romance characters go on about how good looking the other is and about how they've kept thinking about them but although Carlos's rescue was kind I could not see Nik pursuing more from that alone. Both of them were apparently interested but I didn’t get why when reading. And when you were in Carlos’s head and he was thinking things like ‘is that a hint’ or ‘is she giving me signals’ and all that crap just made me like him. Yeah, folks probably do have those thoughts but it was so jarring to read them!

There were characters I was interested to learn more about (I loved Nik’s friends) but that was not enough to keep me reading.

First Earl I See Tonight (debutante Diaries #1) – Anna Bennett

Published: 30th October 2018 Source: Netgalley Genre: Historical Romance My Rating:

An heiress with a daring proposal. An earl who’s determined to resist her. And a love that just might be written in the stars…

Recently jilted by his fiancée, David Gray, Earl of Ravenport is not in the market for a wife. Even if Gray didn’t have his hands full renovating his crumbling country house, it would take more than a bold marriage proposal from a headstrong young beauty to thaw his frozen heart. Gray is confident that spending a week at his ramshackle estate will change her mind about marriage, but every passionate moment he spends with her tempts him to change his…

A talented artist, Miss Fiona Hartley desperately needs her dowry money to pay off a blackmailer set on ruining her sister. The handsome earl seems a sensible choice for a husband…if only she can convince him that romance will play no part. But marrying in name only may prove difficult for Fiona. Gray can’t help but be dazzled by her genuine warmth. Yet as their feelings deepen, Fiona’s deadline looms. Will her secrets destroy them, or is true love their final destiny?

This one I finished (yay) and it was a more middling read for me. I certainly enjoyed myself from time to time but it’s been a month and looking back on this one I have to flick back to my comments I wrote whilst reading because it’s not stood the books amnesia test well. That’s not to say that’s a point against this book, I forget many a book, but if I hadn’t have reread the summary and had a couple of notes to hand I definitely wouldn’t have remembered anything of this book.

There was something which stopped me fully invested in reading this. I did enjoy it and both the characters appealed to me, the Earl was interesting and I liked him, and Fiona’s quest to receive her dowry to pay a blackmailer was pretty exciting (although a touch farfetched). I liked how Fiona was not daunted by anything, she made the most of things and went with it and who can’t respect that in a woman. I did like the interaction between our romantic couple but I just didn’t fully wholeheartedly invested. I did roll my eyes a little as the mystery of the blackmailer was revealed too, because really? I don’t know. It was enjoyable enough and I’d read more from Anna Bennett because hopefully, it would click next time.

Smooth-Talking Cowboy (Gold Valley #1) – Maisey Yates

Published: 1st March 2018

Source: Netgalley

Genre: Contemporary, Romance

My Rating:

Welcome to Gold Valley, Oregon, where a rough-and-tumble rancher and the girl next door are about to learn that opposites attract

Olivia Logan has a plan: win back her ex by making him see what he’s missing. But first she needs to find a man who’s willing to play along. With his laid-back cowboy charm and knack for getting under her skin, Luke Hollister is an unlikely hero—but he wants her help convincing her father to sell him land, which means he needs her as much as she needs him.

Luke likes his life—and his women—uncomplicated. So why does good girl Olivia heat his blood like no one else? She’s always been off-limits, but the more time they spend as Gold Valley’s hottest new “couple,” the more real it’s starting to feel. Luke was supposed to help her win back another man…not keep her in his arms. But now that he has her there, he’s not sure he’ll ever let go.

This one I honestly don’t remember why I requested this on Netgalley because apart from the fake relationship aspect (which is my bread and butter) there is nothing about this which would usually appeal. Cowboys are not my jam in romance (and why are they so popular, there a whole heap of cowboy romances out there in the world!). That being said I did enjoy this but it was another middling read as a whole and that was mostly because the fake relationship didn’t last all that long. The very beginning had Olivia and Luke faking their relationship but it very swiftly turned to a genuine one and this pare who were convinced they weren’t going to be together realised that they had a serious case of denial because there were sparks flying and they definitely were meant to be. I mean, I think that aspect would have worked for me but the part that really annoyed me was Olivia had broken up with her ex to try and push him to ‘put a ring on it’. That kind of game playing rubs me the wrong way so that and her uppity attitude you get from her at the start put me off. You do get to see another side of her but I think as a whole she was never destined to be a heroine I loved because I prefer them a bit more stubborn and with a bit more attitude. In the end, it was ok and I enjoyed it… but I wouldn’t go back for more.

Beneath The Citadel – Destiny Soria

Published: 9th October 2018 Source: Netgalley Genre: Young Adult, Fantasy My Rating:

In the city of Eldra, people are ruled by ancient prophecies. For centuries, the high council has stayed in power by virtue of the prophecies of the elder seers. After the last infallible prophecy came to pass, growing unrest led to murders and an eventual rebellion that raged for more than a decade.


  In the present day, Cassa, the orphaned daughter of rebels, is determined to fight back against the high council, which governs Eldra from behind the walls of the citadel. Her only allies are no-nonsense Alys, easygoing Evander, and perpetually underestimated Newt, and Cassa struggles to come to terms with the legacy of rebellion her dead parents have left her — and the fear that she may be inadequate to shoulder the burden. But by the time Cassa and her friends uncover the mystery of the final infallible prophecy, it may be too late to save the city — or themselves.

This is one I had been excited for, I loved Destiny Soria’s debut, Iron Cast, and so when I saw she had a new fantasy novel coming out I most definitely wanted to read. think my expectations had been a touch high because although I enjoyed it, it didn’t compare to that debut for me. That being said, I don’t really think a novel set in alternate history Boston in 1919 can really be compared to a full fantasy novel set in its own world where there is a city controlled by a government who uses prophecies to stay in power. They're not really comparable so if you loved Iron Cast then be prepared for a different kind of book in this one (which I thought I was but I still something didn’t work for me).

I will say, though, I wasn’t in a fantasy mood when I started this so even I knew it would be a struggle for it to click into place and work for me so the poor book started on the backfoot. It also had multiple POV, not loads, but more than I like in my books and that put me off it a little too. The characters were all interesting and I loved seeing the dynamics between each of them, from Cassa and her back and forth with Evander, to Evander interacting with his sister, Alys. Each character has a distinct personality so even if it hadn’t said at the start of a chapter, you knew whose POV you were reading from. Sadly, I think the multiple POV meant I didn’t connect quick enough with the characters. For the first quarter of the book at least I couldn’t figure why I should care about these characters and even them investigating the corruption of the government did nothing for me.

Maybe if I’d begin this book at another time I’d be raving about. I will say no one can complain about a book which has so much diversity within its pages, from racial diversity to sexual with gay and bi characters. I do appreciate when fantasy novels make the effort because there has been too little diversity in them for too long. I just wish I’d been in a fantasy reading mood for this one as my rating is very much influenced by that.

And this is my first mish-mash of reviews for a little while. I had another one or two I could have included but 5 should be enough for now. Have you read any of these, what did you think?

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