#someone who would always take care of her no matter what

[azrielsdove]

Fated Souls

Warnings: Angst, Light Smut, 18+

***

You observed the celebration around you, watching your friends as they interacted with one another. You brought your wine glass to your lips, taking another slow sip. You had chosen to stick to the edges of the room for this gathering. It was easier that way. You didn’t have to pretend that your heart wasn’t being tortured with every beat it made.

Truthfully, you’d lost count of what glass of wine this was. You enjoyed the way the edges of the room blurred the more you drank, allowing you to pretend it’s all a horrid nightmare instead of your devastating reality.

Until your eyes caught upon them once again. You scowled, tipping your head back as you emptied your drink. Your eyes narrowed as you watched him smile down at her, his hand itching to hold onto her waist. She looked at him with such adoration that you’d have to be brainless to miss it. Everyone knew about the Shadowsinger and middle Archeron sister. You could argue that they turned a blind eye because they wished to see the pair happy, if it weren’t for the fact that their mates were just as widely known.

You rolled your eyes as she let out a soft laugh, placing a hand on the chest of the male that was supposed to be fated to you. Not that he cared. You were tired of this, the constant pining for someone who would never want you. Growing sick of their love-show, you slipped quietly from the room. No one noticed, or if they did they didn’t care. You had become quite a depressing specimen since Elain entered your life.

And since the mating bond snapped to Azriel, who only had eyes for her. Your friends did not know how to speak to you these days, always teetering in awkward conversation. They looked at you as if they stared too close you’d shatter into a thousand pieces. You were fragile, breakable.

It wasn’t always that way. Before this you were one of the fiercest warriors the Night Court had. You held your own against Cassian, earning a place of honor as his right hand. You were a force to be reckoned with. “The Lovely Demon” they called you, whispers of your power and beauty flitting throughout all of Prythian. It made sense for you to be fated to Azriel, the devilishly handsome spymaster. Together you were a death sentence.

A death sentence indeed. You moved throughout the halls, searching for the only one who understood your pain. You were pleased when you found him alone on one of the countless balconies in the House of Wind, leaning over the railing with his own drink in hand. You walked out to him, your heels clicking softy on the stone. He did not turn to look at you, even when you leaned on the railing next to him.

“Beautiful night,” he spoke first, looking intently at the stars. You followed his line of sight, humming in response. Nothing was beautiful to you now.

The two of you stood like that for some time, in an understanding silence. The silver fabric of your dress glowed under the starlight, a sight that would have filled you with confidence before. Now you hardly even noticed.

“Were they…” he began, trailing off. The words were too hard to be spoken aloud, but you knew what he meant. Were they all over each other again? You nodded, noting the way he slung his whiskey back at the action. “Do you think it will ever hurt less?”

Did you? You couldn’t imagine a world in which it didn’t, but surely it wouldn’t be this way forever. You turned to look at him then, taking in the defeated form of the once strong man you knew.

Lucien had been through a lot in the last five centuries. Hel, you all had. No one was the same as they once were. But your friend had suffered more than most, and yet his suffering was brushed under the rug by the Inner Circle. You loved them dearly, yes, yet they oftentimes only focused on themselves. In all honesty you had been the same way before. All that mattered was that you and your family were happy. Others problems could come later.

Once the bond snapped and Azriel chose to ignore it, things changed. You quickly discovered that he meant more to them than you did. Not that they didn’t try to help you, of course. Mor spent many a night lying in your bed with you, holding you tight while tears ran down your face. Nesta brought you books, the closest to acknowledging the messed up way Azriel was acting. But in the end, his feelings would always win. His happiness was more important than yours.

“I can only hope it does,” you finally answered. He finally turned to face you as well, the pain in his eyes like looking in a mirror.

“How do we cope?”

You shook your head, a sad smile playing on your lips. “When you find out, please let me know.”

You stared at each other for a long moment. Perhaps it was the copious amount of alcohol you had ingested, or perhaps it was the deep sadness controlling your heart, but you couldn’t help to notice how stunning Lucien was. Even in his pain drenched form he radiated a sense of power and confidence not many others could. You simply could not wrap your head around Elains distaste for him. You understood she had her own traumas to work through, but she could do worse. You knew Lucien would be kind to her.

Unfortunately she wanted your mate instead. The thought sends a wave of nausea through your body. Lucien noticed the subtle change in your already heartbroken demeanor, reaching his hand out to yours. You gladly held on to him, tears brimming in your eyes. “It’s not fair,” you whispered, the pain building up inside of you. He shook his head, pulling you close to him. He wrapped his arm tight around your waist, the hand on his other one tangling into your hair. You rested your face on the crook of his neck as gasping sobs tore through your very soul. Your nails dug into his shirt, holding onto him as if you were desperately searching for something to ground you. Something to remind you that life still existed, and it wasn’t just you lost in the tumultuous sea of your grief.

Your heart was falling apart. You knew you were not only going to lose Azriel if this continued. If he did fully choose Elain, and she him, your life would be over. Your family would gladly welcome them as one, celebrating their love and joy. You wouldn’t be able to live as you once did. You would flee the Night Court entirely, possibly leaving a note for Rhysand. You couldn’t be sure if he would even notice your absence in the wake of joy for his brother. Though could you blame him? Your soul sang for Azriel’s happiness. It was tearing you apart that it wasn’t with you.

You clung tighter to Lucien, hands shaking. His fingers were tracing patterns in your hair, trying to soothe your fractured mind. “He doesn’t deserve you,” he murmured. His words gave you pause, pulling your face off his shoulder to look up at him. His eyes were glassy, the tears he held refusing to be shed.

“What?” You asked, your voice weak. Lucien looked intently at you, moving his hand to cup your face. His thumb brushed away your tears, a deep sorrow in his eyes.

“It is wrong of him to allow you to be in pain as such. Elain, I give her more grace than most would. But Azriel?” He spoke the shadowsingers name as if it were a curse. “He has no excuse. You have been together centuries now, close as two can be. It should have been an instant joy, the mating bond between you. And yet,” he sighs deeply, thumb tracing your skin once more. “He’s gotten it into his head that he has to be with an Archeron like his brothers.” Your heart stutters as his thumb traces your bottom lip, a fire beginning to rage in his eyes. “He’s taken it upon himself to steal away my mate, while ignoring his own. A sorry thing, too, when she is as lovely as the night she so graciously represents.” His hand slides down to trace your jawline, fire burning your skin wherever he touched. This was wrong. You were both heartbroken, tossed aside by your mates. Friends, yes, but lovers? No. You should pull away, stop this before it goes too far. This was wr-

Oh.

Your head tilted back and your mouth opened slightly as Lucien’s lips met your neck. He kissed your skin like it was his honor to do so, like he would never get the chance again. His lips traveled up to your jaw, kissing slowly across your cheek. You couldn’t breathe as your eyes fluttered closed, lips ready for his.

“Tell me to stop,” he whispered against your skin, nose brushing yours. You knew you should. If you allowed him to kiss you fully you would be fully admitting that Azriel was a lost hope and dream. Allowing another male to touch you in a way only your mate should.

Did it matter when that mate was too busy catching the attention of someone who wasn’t you? When all he wanted was her pretty little mouth on his? What is the harm in you finding what pleasure you could in the wake of the pain he had bestowed upon your very being?

“Kiss me.”

Lucien’s lips met yours with a fervor, an intensity you didn’t know you craved. Arousal began to spread through your body, a need for him that overtook all other thought. You pulled him closer, allowing him to cage you in against the balcony railing. You welcomed his tongue into your mouth, moaning quietly at the taste of him. His hands fell to your waist, one fisting the fabric as his restraint was rapidly fading. “He’s a fool for letting you go,” he said into your mouth, a shiver of delight running down your spine at his words.

“So is she.” His eyes flared and he kissed you again, his hand slowly working your dress up. You gasped as the cool night air danced across your heated skin. You knew you shouldn’t be doing this at all, much less right where anyone could see. The thought of someone catching you made your heart race with scandalous excitement. Not that anyone would have even noticed the two of you were gone.

Lucien’s hand flattened against your bare thigh, having pulled your dress high enough to expose the skin there. You felt alive under his touch, like you were finally being seen. You kissed him as if he were the sun and you were lost in an endless night. His fingers trailed to the inside of your thigh, a hum of surprise coming from him when he discovered you wore nothing under your gown. He found you quickly, pressing gently down on your clit. You gasped into his mouth, arching against him in pleasure. He worked you expertly, moving his fingers like he was put on this world just to please you.

His lips fell from yours, pressing quick kisses on your neck. “I want you hear you,” he whispered into your ear, allowing his thumb to take over the delicious pressure his fingers had been providing. He moved them down, sliding them gently into you. He curled them once he was deep inside, the feeling overpowering. You tilted your head back as you moaned his name, forgetting everything except for him. When Lucien touched you there was no pain from an unwanted mating bond, no thoughts of why you weren’t good enough. There was only you and him. He was painting fire into your soul, giving you the light you needed to live.

Until you felt him be ripped away from you as something cold wound it’s away around your body.

***

i have two separate endings for this! one for lucien and one for azriel <3. i just loved this idea and then couldnt decide which way i wanted it to go haha. i hope you enjoyyyyyy

[gf2bellamy]

Hi!

Could I please request a fem!bau!reader (who isn't dating spencer yet) gets really badly injured by someone so she just shows up to spencer's door at night like 'can you please help me? i don't know where else to go?' and he like takes care of her wounds all gently?

bandage — spencer reid

pairing: spencer reid x fem!reader ( no use of y/n ) content warnings: reader being hurt, mention of blood and open wound , also sort of vv awkward / shy spencer a/n: hi hi ! thanks for your request !! <3 also he's so cute in this gif

Each step you took toward Spencer’s door felt heavier than the last, your heart pounding in your chest as much as the throbbing pain in your arm. 

You hadn’t planned on ending up here. The case had been brutal, and though you’d caught the unsub, it hadn’t come without a cost. He’d lashed out in a final, desperate attempt to escape, and you’d been caught in the crossfire.

The paramedics had patched you up at the scene, but now, hours later, the wound had reopened. Blood seeped through the bandages, staining the fabric of your sleeve, and no matter how much pressure you applied, it wouldn’t stop. 

You’d tried to handle it yourself—really, you had. But the pain was relentless, and the fear of making it worse had finally driven you here.

Spencer’s apartment was close, and you knew he’d know what to do. He always did.

But now, standing in front of his door, you hesitated. The logical part of your brain told you that you were overthinking it—that Spencer wouldn’t mind helping you, that he’d probably be more concerned than annoyed.

But the irrational part of you, the part that was fueled by pain and exhaustion, whispered that you were intruding. That he might be busy, or worse, that he might not want to be bothered at all. 

The pain in your arm flared again, sharp and insistent, and you winced. That was enough to push you forward.

You raised your hand and knocked softly, the sound echoing in the quiet hallway. For a moment, there was nothing but silence, and you wondered if he was even home.

But then you heard footsteps approaching the door. 

It swung open, and there he was. Spencer Reid, hair slightly messy while wearing a loose sweater. He blinked at you, his expression shifting from surprise to concern as he took in the sight of you standing there, clutching your arm. 

“Hey,” he said, his voice soft but tinged with worry. “Are you okay?” 

You shook your head, your voice trembling as you spoke. “I… I didn’t know where else to go. I tried to fix it myself, but it’s not stopping, and I—” 

He didn’t let you finish. “Come in,” he said quickly, stepping aside to let you pass. You stepped into his apartment. It was exactly how you’d imagined it—books stacked everywhere, a cozy couch, and the faint scent of coffee lingering in the air. 

“You can sit on the couch,” Spencer said, his voice soft as he glanced at your arm. “I’ll get the first aid kit.” He didn’t wait for a response before turning and hurrying toward the bathroom.

You did as he said, slowly lowering yourself onto the couch. The cushions were soft. Your eyes wandered around the room.

Your gaze landed on the coffee table, where a half-finished crossword puzzle sat next to a mug with a thin layer of coffee still at the bottom. The sight made you smile.

Of course Spencer would be in the middle of a puzzle at this hour.

Soon enough , Spencer returned, the first aid kit in hand. He sat down next to you, the couch dipping slightly under his weight.

He set the kit on the table and opened it. He pulled out antiseptic and fresh bandages. 

You could feel the warmth of his body next to yours, and it made your heart beat a little faster. He hesitated for a moment before gently reaching for your arm.

“This might… uh, hurt a little,” he mumbled, his voice barely above a whisper. His fingers brushed against the fabric of your sweatshirt, and you felt a shiver run through you as he carefully pushed the sleeve up to expose the wound. 

The old bandage was stained with blood, and he peeled it away slowly, his touch feather-light. You couldn’t help but wince as the air hit the raw skin, and your stomach churned at the sight of the wound.

Instead of looking at the wound, you found yourself looking at him. His brow was furrowed in concentration, his lips pressed into a thin line as he studied the injury. His hair fell slightly into his face, and you had to resist the urge to reach out and brush it back.

Spencer hesitated again, his hand hovering over your arm. “Sorry,” he mumbled, his voice tinged with guilt as he finally pressed the cloth to the wound. 

You hissed in pain, your free hand gripping the edge of the couch as you tried to steady yourself. “It’s okay,” you said through gritted teeth, though your voice wavered. 

He glanced up at you, his eyes filled with concern.He then looked away quickly, focusing back on your arm as he continued to clean the wound. His touch was careful and you could feel the warmth of his fingers against your skin, and it sent a jolt of electricity through you. 

“You’re really good at this,” you said quietly, your voice breaking the silence.

He glanced up at you again, a faint blush creeping across his cheeks. “I, uh… I’ve had to patch myself up a few times,” he admitted, his voice tinged with nervousness. “It’s not exactly my favorite part of the job.” 

You smiled faintly, your eyes never leaving his.

He held your gaze for a moment longer before looking back down at your arm, his hands moving to apply the fresh bandage.

“You should be more careful,” he said softly, his tone laced with something you couldn’t quite place. “I don’t like seeing you hurt.” 

Your heart skipped a beat.

But before you could say anything, he finished securing the bandage and sat back, his hands resting awkwardly in his lap. “There,” he said, his voice barely above a whisper. “That should hold for now.” 

“Thank you,” you said, your voice just as quiet. You didn’t move, and neither did he. 

Spencer cleared his throat, breaking the silence. “Do you, uh… do you want some tea? Or coffee? I mean, it’s late, so maybe tea would be better, but—” 

“Tea sounds great,” you interrupted, smiling softly. 

He nodded, standing up quickly, almost too quickly, and you couldn’t help but notice the way his hands fidgeted at his sides. “Okay. I’ll, uh… I’ll be right back.” 

As he disappeared into the kitchen, you leaned back against the couch, letting out a slow breath as you tried to calm your racing heart.

The pain in your arm had dulled to a manageable ache, but the fluttering in your chest was another story entirely.

A few minutes later, Spencer returned, holding two steaming cups of tea. The faint scent of chamomile and honey filled the air, and you couldn’t help but smile as he approached.

He was careful not to spill as he handed you one of the cups, his fingers brushing against yours for the briefest moment. 

“Careful, it’s hot,” he said, his voice low and slightly nervous. 

“Thanks,” you murmured, taking the cup with your uninjured arm. The warmth seeped into your hands, and you brought it to your lips, blowing gently before taking a small sip.

He sat down beside you, leaving just enough space between you to be polite, but not so much that you couldn’t feel his warmth.

He held his own cup carefully, his eyes fixed on the steam rising from the surface as if it were the most fascinating thing in the world. 

“Thank you,” you said softly. “For… everything. I’m sorry for just showing up like this. I didn’t mean to bother you.” 

Spencer shook his head quickly, his expression softening. “You’re not a bother,” he said, his voice earnest. “I’m glad you came to me. I mean, I wish you hadn’t gotten hurt in the first place, but… I’m glad you’re here.” 

You smiled faintly, your fingers tracing the rim of your cup. “Still, I feel bad for just showing up unannounced. I know you probably had plans or… or something.” 

He chuckled softly, a hint of nervousness in the sound. “Plans? No, not really. Unless you count rereading The Brothers Karamazov for the third time as plans.” 

You laughed. “That sounds like a very Spencer Reid kind of night.” 

He smiled back at you, his eyes crinkling at the corners in that way that always made your stomach flutter. “Yeah, well… it’s not exactly the most exciting way to spend an evening.” 

“I don’t know,” you said, your tone teasing. “It sounds kind of nice. Quiet. Cozy.” 

He glanced at you, his smile lingering. “It is. But… this is better.” 

The words hung in the air between you, and you felt your cheeks warm. You looked down at your tea, suddenly feeling shy. “Yeah,” you said quietly. “It is.” 

The conversation eventually drifted to lighter topics—work, books, the crossword puzzle on the coffee table—and for a while, it felt like the world outside Spencer’s apartment didn’t exist.

The pain in your arm faded into the background, replaced by the warmth of the tea and the even warmer feeling of being near him. 

When you finally finished your tea, you set the cup down on the table and stood up. “I should probably get going,” you said reluctantly, though every part of you wanted to stay. 

Spencer stood too, looking slightly disappointed. “Are you sure you’re okay to go home? I can… I can drive you, if you want.” 

You shook your head, smiling softly. “I’ll be fine. You’ve already done more than enough.” 

You paused at the door, turning to face him. He was standing close, closer than you’d expected, and you could see the faint blush on his cheeks, the way his eyes flickered to yours before looking away.

“Thanks again,” you said. “For… well, for everything.” 

He nodded, his expression soft. “Anytime. Really.” 

You hesitated for a moment, your heart racing as you made a decision. Before you could overthink it, you stepped closer, standing on your tiptoes, and pressed a soft kiss to his cheek. His skin was warm under your lips, and you could feel the way he froze, his breath catching. 

When you pulled back, his eyes were wide, his cheeks flushed, and you couldn’t help but smile.

“Goodnight, Spencer,” you said, your voice barely above a whisper. 

He didn’t say anything at first, just stared at you like he was trying to process what had just happened.

But then, slowly, a small smile spread across his face. “Goodnight,” he murmured, his voice soft and warm. 

You turned and stepped out into the hallway, your heart still racing as you walked away. But as you glanced back one last time, you saw him still standing in the doorway, his fingers brushing against the spot where you’d kissed him, a dazed look on his face. 

[comflexxed]

june hadn’t known what came after a love like theirs, either.

he had spent so much of his life believing in temporary things, in fleeting moments that would never last. even after meeting hans, even after falling into the kind of love he never thought was meant for him, there had always been that quiet fear lingering in the back of his mind — what happens when the dream ends?

but it hadn’t ended. it had only ever grown.

june shifted slightly, adjusting the weight of their daughter in his arms as she babbled softly, her toy gripped tightly in one hand as her other rested against his chest. she was warm, safe, small fingers curling against the fabric of his shirt as he rocked her gently, watching the scene unfold before them.

hans and their son in the garden, a sight so tender and so full of love that it made june’s breath catch. hans had always been gentle, always careful, and the way he guided their son’s hands over the soil, the way he had dressed him in a tiny apron and sunhat to protect him, made june’s heart ache with something deep and immeasurable.

this was their happily ever after. and it wasn’t an ending. it was the start of something endless.

june returned hans’s wave with a small smile, tilting his head as their daughter let out a delighted squeal at the sight of her father. she adored hans — both of their children did. how could they not, when hans had the kindest hands, the warmest voice, a love so vast and unwavering that it wrapped around them all like a shield?

scooter came bounding in with a stick, and just like that, their son’s attention shifted, his little hands grasping for it as he threw it with all his strength. june chuckled softly, pressing a kiss to their daughter’s head as hans made his way toward him, his expression full of pride as he took his seat beside him.

june huffed a quiet laugh, his free hand finding hans’s without a second thought, fingers sliding together as naturally as breathing. “that’s longer than i expected,” he murmured, eyes flicking to their son, who was now fully immersed in a game of fetch with scooter. “i’d call that a win.”

jinx wasted no time curling up in hans’s lap, and for a moment, june just sat there, taking it all in. the warm weight of their daughter against his chest, the feeling of hans’s hand in his own, the soft afternoon breeze rustling through the trees. this was their home, their life, their family.

he had never imagined this for himself. never thought he’d have something this whole, this complete. and yet, here it was.

june let out a slow breath, his grip on hans’s hand tightening slightly. “if someone had told me years ago that this was what happiness looked like,” he admitted, his voice quiet, thoughtful, “i don’t think i would’ve believed them.”

his gaze drifted over their home, he thought about the garden hans had cultivated with such care, the patio they had built together, the little hands that had reached for them in the middle of the night, needing comfort, needing love. “but it’s ours,” he said, tilting his head to look at hans, at the man he had chosen to spend forever with. “and i wouldn’t trade it for anything.”

the sun had started to dip lower in the sky, painting the world in soft gold, and june knew — he knew — that no matter what came next, no matter how many new chapters were written, their love would be woven into all of it.

june exhaled softly, a sound that wasn’t quite a laugh, but something gentler, something full. he looked at hans — at his husband — and felt the weight of his words settle in his chest, steady like a lighthouse guiding him home.

june had never been one for grand declarations, for putting his feelings into words that could match the enormity of them, but standing here, with hans by his side, he thought maybe he understood how to try.

he watched as hans lifted their hands to the sun, the rings catching the light and glinting like they had been forged from the very rays that warmed their skin. the engagement ring that had once been the only symbol of their quiet promise was now joined by the bands that would mark them forever — husbands in name, in love, and in truth.

june’s lips twitched into a smile as hans declared his intent to show the world, his happiness so uncontainable that it had to be shared. that was hans — his hans —who had once carried so many worries about what could go wrong, who had once hesitated to reach for the things he wanted most. and now, here he was, holding june’s hand high, no hesitation and no fear, only love.

june’s fingers tightened around hans’s, grounding them together. “then let them see,” he murmured, his voice low but sure, his gaze never leaving hans’s. “let them all see.”

scooter and jinx had finally settled at their feet, their small forms curled into the sand, carrying the same ease that settled in june’s heart. family. that was what this was. not just a wedding, not just a day — they had officially built something together.

there had been a time when june had struggled to believe in things like permanence. the world had felt like a place where things were fleeting, where love was something fragile, easily lost, easily broken. but then there had been hans.

hans, who had never let him go.

hans, who had given him a love so unwavering, so absolute, that june had no choice but to believe in it, too.

june swallowed against the emotion building in his chest, tilting his head slightly as he looked at his husband—the love of his life. “good,” he murmured, his voice quiet but thick with feeling. “because you’re my happiness too. and i’m never going anywhere.”

his hand, still entwined with hans’s, lifted to his lips, and june pressed a soft kiss against his knuckles, lingering there for just a moment. a vow, sealed not in words, but in touch, in presence, in all the quiet ways he had always loved hans and would continue to love him for the rest of their days.

let the world see.

let them all know.

hans was his.

and june was his, forever.

[muxshwriting]

compelling

Feud-Rautha Harkonnen x reader

summary: Feyd can no longer live with only a portion of his wife and strives to find who she truly is || word count: 948 || masterlist

once again, I have been peer pressured (someone very politely requested) and I am being forced (I wrote this in a peak of artistic inspiration) to publish a third part to voiceless and articulate. Enjoy!

REQUESTED: I've read all your Feyd stories and I love them! Would you please consider doing a continuation of "Articulate" where Feyd is so desperate to win over his wife that he asks her new friends for advice? Thank you.

Ever since you’d postponed your day with him, Feyd had been unable to think of anything else. He couldn’t imagine what else you spent your days doing, what was more important to you than him. As he began craving your presence, he noticed just how much time you spent out of your chambers, elsewhere.

He approached you one evening when you were getting ready for bed. “Y/N?” He stopped calling you ‘Wife’ when he noticed the subtle flinch that accompanied its use. “Where do you spend your days? You always return with such happiness.” He meant nothing by it, a simple observation that you always glowed a little brighter afterwards.

You hesitated before answering, hearing horror stories of what Feyd has done to servants. “I- My handmaiden and some of the other maids, they spend their days teaching me things about our house, about Geidi Prime. I enjoy their company.” You admitted.

Feyd frowned. “Your handmaiden? You’ve been hiding away with your handmaiden all this time?”

“Do not speak of her with such disdain! She is my friend. You will do her no harm or I will never forgive you.”

“What?”

You mistook his confusion for insult. “You heard me-“

“You misunderstand, my love.” That title was a new one. “I am simply surprised. I worried you had filled your time with another lover. That I would not be so kind towards.”

The endearment that slipped from his lips did not escape unnoticed by you and you felt your heart fluttering slightly within your chest. The careless and childish hopes from the beginning on your marriage had the nerve to peek their heads towards daylight and it took all your might to push them back down. He was just a possessive man, claiming what was already his. He could not love you, not the way you wanted him to.

“Oh. No! I would never- I would never take a lover Feyd. I am not a traitor.”

“I- I was not trying to imply-“ It was the first time you had ever heard Feyd be uncertain in anything, stumbling over his words.

He reached out to you and you let him slip your hand into his. His body was mere inches from yours as he stood silently, staring down at you.

“I’m sorry.” It was a murmur of an apology you never thought he was even capable of. “Please tell your handmaiden… thank you from me, for taking care of you.”

Your eyes soften as you take a small step so you’re truly in each other’s space. “I shall pass along your message. Goodnight husband.” There’s a softness behind your words that Feyd hasn’t heard in a while and he’s very grateful for its return.

In the days following your discussion, you and Feyd had minimised some of the distance between you, but not all. There was space Feyd couldn’t cross alone, no matter how much he wanted to. He needed help, aid from someone who knew you far better than he did.

Reluctantly, Feyd made his way down to the servants quarters. He stops silently outside the door, suddenly nervous to enter.

He knocked and your handmaiden opened the door, paling at the sight of the Na-Baron. “My Lord Feyd.” She bowed before him, slipping out into the hallway. “How can I assist you?” Despite your assurance that your husband would never hurt her, your handmaiden still had fear when stood in front of Feyd.

Feyd seemed unsure of himself now that he was stood in front of someone about to ask for their help. “I wish to help my wife.”

“Is the Na-Baroness unwell?”

“She is fine.” Feyd said shortly. “But our marriage…” He does not wish to continue and your handmaiden knows it.

Slyly, she looks him up and down with a knowing look. “It’s called love. She feels it too.”

“She-“ Feyd stopped himself. “She loves me?”

“And you love her. She’s just hesitant to give you all of herself.”

He took a moment to breathe, his head spinning from the realisation that his wife loved him. “I love her…”

“Then tell her that.” Your handmaiden pressed. “Tell her she is loved.”

Heeding your handmaiden’s words, Feyd approached the evening much differently than he normally would. He greeted you as he entered your chambers, a small smile across his face as he offered to help you change and you, surprised, allowed him to.

He couldn’t stop the giddy feeling his heart had when you leant into him as he pulled the pins from your hair. You let yourself lean in, praying that life had finally dealt you the perfect hand.

Beyond either os your notices, you handmaiden had slipped into your chambers, aiming to help you get ready for the evening. But upon seeing your gentle embrace with Feyd, a knowing smile spread across her lips and she turned on her heel to slip back out again. Her shoe brushed against the floor for just a second and you glanced up at her.

Silently, a conversation passes. A frown, a smile, a nod. A look towards Feyd, a glance you made in his direction. He’s aware of all that is going but blissfully choosing to ignore it, his eyes almost slipping shut as he runs his hand down your back and letting it settle at your waist.

No words are exchanged as the evening progresses, but the light touches continue and you never find yourself out of Feyd’s space for more than a second. It isn’t until you’re in bed and wrapped in his arms that you speak.

“Goodnight my love.”

Feyd smiles against you and murmurs the same sentiment back, finally slipping into sleep.

[43luv]

Summary: Luke Hughes learns how to love

Word Count: 1.1k Warnings: lots of fluff!! A/n: guys idk how to feel about this but pls enjoy :)

Luke Hughes wasn’t known for being good at expressing his feelings. He was the youngest of three, and growing up saying how you felt got you a fist to the face. It wasn't his brothers fault, they all loved one another dearly but, it was engraved in their brains that feelings were a sign of weakness. 

Their mom, however, always said that expressing your feelings was the way to a woman's heart. Things like “i love you” and untimely kisses on a cheek. 

Quinn was the best at it. Being the eldest and the biggest mama's boy definitely helped. He would say when he disliked something, had no problem correcting things or telling someone off. Everything was always in a calm tone, his posture always light and inviting. He was a gentleman really, opening doors, giving out compliments and praise. Knowing every right from wrong, probably why he was named captain.

Jack was maybe a little too good at it. He loved the attention, so it only made sense he loved giving it as well. He would compliment you, and stand there, waiting patiently for one in return. He gave the greatest hugs, always having a compliment for whoever he was meeting. Jack was good at saying the things on his mind as well. Had no problem with telling someone when they were annoying him, no problem saying I love you.

And Luke… well Luke was still figuring it out. He had no problem with saying when he didn't like something, and had no problem giving out compliments. His problem however, no matter how hard he tried, was the romantic side of it. It sounds bad, but to him love was always such a heavy subject. One reserved for family and very close friends. He was tentative, never knowing when something should be classified as “love” or not. Never knew when to show it, either. 

So yes, dating Luke might be a little hard. A challenge, some may say. But you love a good challenge.

When the two of you first met, he instantly fell in love. Tripped over his own feet and rushed through his words as he asked you out on a date. 

He called Quinn when he got home, his palms sweaty and breathing rushed.

“How do you go on a date?”

A weird question, an even weirder opening line. But that didn't stop the eldest Hughes brother from sitting straight up, his eyebrows furrowed as he wiped the sleep away from his eyes. “Huh?”

“I asked the prettiest girl in Jersey out on a date, and i don't know what to do now!”

His words were rushed, breathless. His one hand gripped the edge of the kitchen counter. 

“Take her to a restaurant?”

So he did. He picked the fanciest restaurant, with the fanciest food and drinks. He picked you up, he was trembling as he handed you flowers at your front door. He loved the dress you were wearing, a dark navy one, it complimented you, he thought. And he wanted to tell you but alarms blared in his mind. 

The date went amazingly well. He was a gentleman but all night you longed for a compliment. But you could tell he found you endearing. His eyes told you that. They followed you throughout the night. Sparkling when you talked and crinkled when you laughed. 

Eventually, he asked you to be his girlfriend. He had no idea how he did it, still doesn’t. It was probably the adrenaline talking, or maybe the way you smiled at him like he hung the moon. Either way, you said yes, and for the first time in a long time, Luke felt like he did something right.

At first, being with Luke meant reading between the lines. He wasn’t the guy who flooded your phone with sweet texts or showered you with constant affection. But he showed he cared in other ways. He always remembered the little things—your coffee order, how you hated the sound of silverware scraping against plates, the way you tucked your hair behind your ear when you were nervous. And he always walked on the outside of the sidewalk, like a silent promise to protect you.

Still, you wanted him to know that words mattered too. So, you started small.

“I love when you do that,” you’d say, squeezing his hand when he opened doors for you.

“I love your laugh,” you told him once, after he cracked a joke that wasn’t even that funny, just because you liked the sound.

And every time you used the word “love,” you saw something shift in him. His shoulders would relax a little. The crease in his brow would fade. And little by little, he started saying it back—in his own way.

It wasn’t grand speeches or endless declarations. It was the soft, quiet moments. The way his thumb brushed circles on your skin when you held hands. The way he mumbled, “Missed you,” against your hair after road trips. The way he leaned in to kiss you like he had all the time in the world.

And eventually, the words came easier.

One night, after a long day, you found him sitting on the couch, scrolling through his phone. You plopped down beside him, leaning your head on his shoulder.

“Long day?” you asked softly.

He sighed, dropping his phone on the coffee table. “Yeah. Felt off on the ice.”

You wrapped your arms around his waist, squeezing him gently. “You’re too hard on yourself, Luke.”

He huffed a quiet laugh. “Yeah, well…I don’t wanna let anyone down.”

Without thinking, you kissed his shoulder. “You won’t. Never will.”

And that was the thing about you. You never asked him to change. You just gave him the space to be himself, rough edges and all. Slowly, that wall he had built around his heart started to crumble.

One night, he blurted it out without warning.

“I love you,” he said, voice soft but sure, like he’d known it for a while but didn’t know how to say it.

You smiled, heart swelling in your chest as you brushed a curl away from his forehead. “I love you too.”

And just like that, the words didn’t feel so heavy anymore.

He still wasn’t perfect at it. He’d stumble over his words sometimes, or fumble through compliments like he wasn’t sure they were good enough. But you never minded. Because love wasn’t about perfection. It was about effort.

And Luke? He was always willing to try for you.

Main Masterlist || Luke Hughes Masterlist

lots of love, Kenzie

[s4svnn]

Out of bounds . JJK

↳ 𝐬𝐲𝐧𝐨𝐩𝐬𝐢𝐬; his love subjected you to the true extent of deception, a merciless lie wrapped in the illusion of paradise, until the truth tore it apart - he was always out of bounds.

↳ Jungkook x reader

↳ 𝐬𝐭𝐚𝐭𝐮𝐬: ongoing

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

Chapter Forty Two

I lay in bed, staring up at the ceiling, my thoughts racing far too fast for rest to find me. The blankets were warm, cocooning me in comfort, yet my mind refused to settle. Because today—everything about today—lingered in my chest like a soft ache pressing against my ribs, refusing to fade.

If someone had told me a few weeks ago that Jungkook would be the one putting in this much effort for me, I would have laughed. Matter of a fact I would have laughed and called them insane. The Jungkook I had come to know wasn’t the kind of man who apologized. He wasn’t the kind of man who went out of his way to fix things or to prove that he cared. And yet, here he was. Doing exactly that over and over again.

I turned onto my side, hugging the pillow close as I let myself really think about it. He had taken me to see his mother today. His mother. That wasn’t something to take lightly. That wasn’t something you shared unless you truly wanted someone to see the parts of you that weren’t so easy to show. I could still see the way his hands had trembled, the way his shoulders had stiffened as he tried to hold himself together, only to crumble when we finally stood before her grave.

But he hadn’t been alone. Because I had been there. And for once, he had let me be there.

And then—God, then he had gone to my mum. Had looked her in the eye and asked for her approval, not because he had to, not because anyone had told him to, but because he wanted to. Because he wanted her to know that he wasn’t playing games. That he was serious about making things right, about making her daughter his.

I swallowed, gripping the fabric of my blanket tighter. He had helped me face my past. He had walked beside me through the very memories I had spent years running from, not forcing me, not rushing me, just being there. And I hadn’t realized just how much I had needed that—needed him.

The thought sent a warmth spreading through my chest, soft and terrifying all at once. Because this was real. This wasn’t some fleeting moment of kindness or an act to make himself feel better. Jungkook was really trying. He was putting in the effort, showing up for me in ways I had never expected. And for the first time in a long time, I felt like I wasn’t facing everything alone. I bit my lip, pressing my face into the pillow, as a small, completely involuntary smile tugged at the corners of my lips.

And then there was tomorrow. I had no idea what he had planned. But the fact that I was actually excited to find out made my stomach twist with something I wasn’t ready to accept. Because if there was one thing I was beginning to learn about Jungkook, it was that he never did anything halfway. And whatever tomorrow held, I had a feeling it would only bring me closer to seeing the truth.

That maybe just maybe he was someone worth falling for.

Saturday:

Jungkook’s POV

The morning air carried the lingering chill of dawn as I stepped out of the hotel lobby and into the quiet city streets. The sun had only just begun to rise, casting long golden streaks across the pavement, the world still moving at a sluggish pace as the day stretched itself awake.

But my mind was already wide awake—racing, buzzing, filled with nothing but her.

Even after everything that had happened yesterday—standing beside Aylah at my mother’s grave, watching her face her own past, feeling the warmth of her mother’s acceptance as she pulled me into an embrace—I still couldn’t fully process how much had changed between us. Just a few weeks ago, she barely wanted to look at me, let alone trust me. And now?

Now, she was letting me in. The thought made my chest tighten in the best way possible, an unfamiliar but welcome warmth settling beneath my ribs. I never expected to feel like this, to want something so badly that I’d be willing to prove myself over and over again just for the chance to earn it. But for her? For Aylah? I would do anything.

I reached my car, keys in hand, a small smirk pulling at my lips as I imagined her reaction to what I had planned for today. She had no idea what was coming, and that made it even better. 

But just as I reached for the door handle, a strange feeling crawled up my spine.

A sharp prickle.

The kind of sensation that made the hairs on the back of my neck stand up, my muscles instinctively tensing as an uncomfortable awareness settled over me.

I wasn’t alone. Someone was watching me.

My grip tightened around my keys as I glanced over my shoulder, eyes scanning the dimly lit parking lot. There were a few cars scattered around, their windshields glinting in the sunlight, but other than that—nothing. The street beyond was just as empty. No one was there.

Yet, that feeling remained.

I exhaled slowly, shaking my head as I tried to push away the unease. Maybe I was just being paranoid. Maybe I was just on edge from everything that had been happening lately. With a quiet sigh, I unlocked the car, sliding into the driver’s seat and shutting the door behind me.

But even as I started the engine, the discomfort lingered.

It settled deep into my bones, an unwelcome presence that I couldn’t shake. I pulled out of the parking space, merging onto the main road. The city had woken up now, cars beginning to fill the streets, pedestrians rushing across sidewalks, coffee cups in hand. It was a normal morning—nothing unusual, nothing out of the ordinary.

But then I glanced at my rearview mirror.

A black car.

At first, I didn’t think much of it. It wasn’t uncommon to see the same car for a few blocks, especially during the morning rush. But something about this one made me look twice.

It had been behind me for a while.

I switched lanes.

So did they.

I made a turn onto a different street.

So did they.

A slow, creeping unease wrapped around my chest, squeezing. My hands flexed against the steering wheel as I tested them again, taking another unexpected turn.

They followed.

Shit.

My pulse kicked up, heart beginning to pound against my ribs. I wasn’t imagining this. Someone was following me.

I pressed my foot down on the accelerator, picking up speed as I merged onto the highway. Maybe I was just overthinking it. Maybe I was being dramatic. But the moment I sped up, the black car did too, matching my pace with an almost deliberate precision.

Adrenaline burned through my veins.

I wove through the morning traffic, darting between cars with sharp movements. My tires screeched slightly against the asphalt as I pushed the speedometer higher, my focus razor-sharp as I tried to lose them.

But they weren’t backing off.

No hesitation. No delay. Whoever was behind the wheel wasn’t just tailing me—they were keeping up with me too well. A cold realization settled over me. This wasn’t just some random driver going the same way. This was intentional.

I clenched my jaw, pushing the speed even further as I cut across lanes, weaving in and out of cars with pinpoint precision. The city blurred past me, buildings and streetlights flashing in streaks of color as I maneuvered through the chaos.

The black car was still there.

Still keeping pace.

A spike of frustration flared in my chest. My fingers curled tightly around the wheel as I made a hard right, swerving off the highway onto a smaller, nearly empty road. The sharp turn jolted my car, but I kept control, adjusting my grip as I floored the gas.

My heart thundered in my ears as I flicked my gaze to the rearview mirror.

The black car was gone.

I exhaled sharply, the tension in my shoulders beginning to ease as I finally allowed myself to breathe. My grip on the wheel loosened just a fraction as I scanned the road behind me again.

Did I lose them?

I forced out a quiet, bitter chuckle, running a hand through my hair as I shook my head. Maybe I had just been overreacting. Maybe I was—

My whole world shattered.

Out of nowhere, the same black car came barreling in from the right, slamming into my vehicle with a force so violent, so brutal, that my body was jerked forward, my seatbelt digging into my chest as the impact tore through me like a shockwave.

The air was filled with the screech of twisting metal, the shatter of glass exploding around me as my car lurched sideways. The tires skidded against the asphalt, struggling for control, but it was too late.

The force was too strong.

My car flipped.

The world spun into a chaotic blur, my vision flickering with flashes of color—gray, black, silver, red. My body whipped against the seatbelt as I was thrown upside down, the violent impact of each roll rattling my bones.

Glass rained down, cutting into my skin, burning against my face as the sheer force of the crash made my head snap back.

Then—

Silence.

I was upside down, stuck in the car with blood streaming down my face. Everything hurt.

The faint sound of tires screeching away rang in the distance, fading as the black car sped off, leaving me wrecked and bleeding in the middle of the empty road. 

Who ever this was. One thing was certain. They wanted me dead.

Aylah’s POV

The rhythmic motion of my hand against the countertop slowed as my eyes flickered back to my phone for what had to be the hundredth time. The screen remained dark—no new messages, no missed calls.

Still nothing.

Jungkook hadn’t texted me. Not even once.

I sighed, gripping the cloth in my hand tighter as I absentmindedly wiped the already spotless counter, my thoughts restless and uneasy. He had promised to text me in the morning, said he had something planned for today. And yet, here I was, staring at a silent phone, fighting the ridiculous feeling of disappointment settling in my chest.

It was stupid to feel this anxious, wasn’t it? He was probably just busy. Maybe something came up, or he overslept. Yeah, that had to be it.

And yet… that didn’t explain the gnawing sensation in the pit of my stomach, the way my heart felt heavier with every passing minute of silence.

I was so lost in my thoughts that I barely registered the sudden weight of an arm draping over my shoulder until Kayla’s voice rang out beside me.

"Okay, what’s with the face?" she teased, peering at me with curiosity. "Boyfriend not texted yet?"

I rolled my eyes, attempting to school my features into something neutral, though I could tell by the smug look on her face that I wasn’t doing a very good job. "He’s not my boyfriend."

Kayla hummed in amusement, pulling back just enough to study me. "Uh-huh. So why do you keep checking your phone every five seconds?"

I hesitated, but there was no point in lying—she knew me too well. I exhaled, finally setting the cloth down and crossing my arms over my chest. "He told me yesterday that he had something planned for today. Said he’d text me in the morning to let me know when to get ready." I glanced at my phone again, as if it would magically light up. "But he still hasn’t said anything."

"Maybe he’s still putting the final touches on your little date."

I shot her a glare. "It’s not a date."

She smirked. "Tomato, tomahto."

I huffed in frustration, turning back toward the counter in an attempt to hide the warmth creeping up my neck. I didn’t know why I was getting so flustered—it wasn’t like I was waiting on a text from a crush or something.

"Didn’t you have somewhere to be today?"

"I did," she admitted, eating a slice of apple. "But the person took a rain check on me."

I narrowed my eyes at her, sensing that she was being deliberately vague. "So you’re still not going to tell me who this mysterious man is?"

She winked. "Now, where’s the fun in that?"

I let out a laugh, shaking my head at her antics, and for a moment, the lightheartedness of the conversation was enough to push away the nagging worry in the back of my mind.

But then my phone started ringing.

The sudden sound sliced through our laughter, and my stomach twisted as I quickly reached for it, my brows furrowing when I saw the name flashing across the screen.

Damian.

My lips parted slightly in confusion. Damian never called me this early.

A strange feeling settled in my gut as I swiped to answer. "Hello—"

"Is Jungkook with you?"

His voice was urgent—sharp, cutting me off before I could even finish my greeting.

My grip on the phone tightened, my entire body stilling. "No… isn’t he still at the hotel?"

There was a brief silence on the other end, then a slow, measured inhale.

"He’s not there."

The uneasy feeling in my stomach hardened into something colder. "What do you mean he’s not there?"

Damian exhaled. "AJ… a Bugatti Chiron was reported to have been in an accident on the highway."

Everything inside me went still.

I felt my breath hitch, my heart missing a beat. "A—A Bugatti Chiron?"

"Yeah." His voice was quieter now, more cautious. "Apparently, it was a really bad accident… and the driver’s in a coma."

A sharp chill shot down my spine. I swallowed, my throat suddenly dry, the words barely making it past my lips.

"A-and you think it’s…?"

"I’m not sure yet," Damian admitted, his voice tight with uncertainty. "I’ve been calling his phone non-stop, but he hasn’t picked up. And his Bugatti’s gone from the hotel parking lot."

My chest tightened, panic clawing at my ribs. No. No, it couldn’t be.

"Maybe it’s just a coincidence," I whispered, though even as I said it, the words felt hollow.

Damian let out a shaky exhale, as if he was trying to convince himself of the same thing. "Let’s hope so." He paused, his hesitation making my pulse race even faster. "I’ll let you know if I find out anything."

"O-okay," I murmured.

The call ended, but my hand remained clenched around the phone, my knuckles turning white. The world around me felt distant, muffled, like I was underwater.

"AJ?"

I turned slowly, my gaze meeting Kayla’s. Her teasing demeanor was gone now, replaced with concern as she studied my face.

"Is everything okay?" she asked carefully.

I tried to speak, but my throat felt tight, the words refusing to come out. I swallowed hard, shaking my head slightly as I forced myself to answer. "I… I don’t know."

Kayla’s brows knitted together. "What do you mean?"

I took a shaky breath, my fingers trembling slightly as I lowered my phone. "Damian just called. He—he said there was a Bugatti Chiron in a really bad accident this morning. The driver’s in a coma."

Her face paled instantly.

"A Bugatti Chiron?" she repeated, her voice laced with growing alarm. "But isn’t that—"

"Yeah," I cut in, my voice barely above a whisper. "That’s Jungkook’s car."

Kayla’s lips parted as if she wanted to say something—something reassuring, something logical—but nothing came out. The tension between us grew heavier, like a thick fog pressing down on my chest.

"Maybe it’s not him," she said after a long pause, though her tone lacked conviction. "I mean, a lot of people have fancy cars like that, right?"

I wanted to believe her. God, I wanted to believe her so badly.

But I couldn’t. Because even if there were other people in this city who owned the same car, the fact that Jungkook’s was suddenly missing, and he wasn’t answering his phone, made it impossible to ignore the sinking dread clawing at me.

Kayla reached out, her fingers grazing my arm. "Babe, look at me."

I forced my eyes up to meet hers, my vision slightly blurred from the panic rising inside me.

"We don’t know for sure yet," she said firmly. "Damian’s checking. You can’t jump to conclusions."

I exhaled shakily, nodding even though my gut told me otherwise. "Yeah… yeah, you’re right."

Still, my fingers itched to call him, to hear his voice, to have him pick up and tell me I was being ridiculous.

Without thinking, I dialed his number.

It rang.

And rang.

And rang.

"The number you have dialed is currently unavailable—"

I ended the call before the automated voice could finish, my chest tightening. Something was wrong. I turned away from Kayla, gripping the edge of the counter as I tried to steady my breathing. Everything felt off—like the ground beneath me was shifting, and I couldn’t find my balance.

Seconds felt like hours. Minutes stretched endlessly. I stood frozen in the kitchen, my hands gripping the counter so tightly that my knuckles turned white. The sickening weight in my chest refused to budge, and no matter how much I tried to tell myself that everything was fine, that there was no way the driver in that accident was Jungkook—I just knew.

Kayla lingered beside me, shifting her weight nervously from foot to foot. She kept glancing at me like she wanted to say something, but she didn’t. Probably because she knew that nothing she said would make a difference right now.

Then my phone rang again.

I practically lunged for it, my heart hammering as I saw Damian’s name flash across the screen. My fingers fumbled to accept the call.

“H-Hello?” My voice was barely steady.

There was a pause on the other end. A pause that made my stomach churn violently. 

“AJ.” Damian’s voice was different this time. Lower. Heavier. Like he didn’t want to say what he was about to say.

I swallowed the lump in my throat. “Did you find out?”

Another pause.

“The driver…” He hesitated for a split second, but that was all it took. My entire body locked up, my breath catching in my throat as dread crawled up my spine.

“… It was Jungkook.”

The world tilted. A sharp ringing filled my ears as my vision blurred, my grip on my phone going slack.

“No,” I whispered, my voice barely audible.

“AJ—”

“No, no, that’s not—” I squeezed my eyes shut, shaking my head violently as if that would somehow make this all go away. “It’s not him. It’s not—”

“I’m at the hospital right now,” Damian cut in, his voice still steady, but I could hear the strain beneath it. “They brought him in a few hours ago. He’s in surgery.”

I swayed slightly, my legs suddenly feeling too weak to hold me up.

Surgery.

Jungkook was in surgery.

“Hey,” Kayla’s voice broke through the haze, her hands suddenly gripping my arms, steadying me. “What’s wrong? What did he say?”

I couldn’t answer. Because if I said it out loud, it would make it real.

“AJ, you need to get down here,” Damian continued, his voice quieter now. “They won’t tell me much because I’m not family, but… it’s bad.”

I forced myself to breathe, even as my lungs felt like they were caving in.

“I-I’m coming,” I managed to say, my voice shaking uncontrollably.

“Okay,” Damian said softly. “I’ll wait outside for you.”

The call ended, and for a moment, I just stood there, staring blankly at my phone as the weight of his words settled over me like a crushing force.

Jungkook.

Surgery.

It’s bad.

“AJ breathe,” Kayla pressed, her hands still firm on my arms, her eyes wide with concern. “What happened?”

I sucked in a breath, barely able to get the words out.

“It was him,” I whispered. “Jungkook… he—” My voice cracked, my throat burning. “He was in the accident. He’s in surgery.”

Kayla inhaled sharply, her grip tightening. “Oh my God.”

“I—I have to go,” I said quickly, stepping back and moving toward the door, my body running on autopilot. I couldn’t think, couldn’t process anything except the overwhelming need to get to him.

“I’m coming with you,” Kayla said immediately.

I didn’t argue. I couldn’t.

Because all I could think about was Jungkook.

Lying in a hospital bed.

Fighting for his life.

The moment Kayla pulled up to the hospital entrance, I was already unbuckling my seatbelt.

“AJ, wait—”

I didn’t. I threw the car door open and rushed inside, my breath coming in short, panicked bursts as I scanned the waiting room.

Damian stood near the reception desk, his head bowed, fingers running through his hair in a way that told me he was just as on edge as I was. The second his eyes met mine, I knew. There was no good news.

“Damian,” I breathed, my legs carrying me toward him before I had even fully processed what I was doing. “What—”

“He’s still in surgery,” Damian cut in, his voice low. “They won’t tell me anything else.”

My stomach twisted painfully. Still in surgery.

I swallowed hard, trying to steady myself, but it felt impossible. I clenched my fists, my nails digging into my palms. “Did they say how bad it is?”

Damian hesitated. “I overheard a nurse talking to the doctors. He—he lost a lot of blood.”

I felt like I had been punched in the gut.

“They said… the crash was bad. The car flipped multiple times. By the time they got to him, he was unconscious.” Damian exhaled shakily. “His face… his arms… there was so much glass.”

I squeezed my eyes shut, my chest rising and falling rapidly. I didn’t want to hear this. I didn’t want to picture him like that.

“I need a moment,” I whispered, barely recognizing my own voice. It was hoarse, shaky—on the verge of breaking completely.

I didn’t wait for a response. I pushed myself up and turned on my heel, walking briskly toward the exit. I could feel Damian and Kayla’s eyes on me, but neither of them tried to stop me. Maybe they understood that if they did, I would shatter right there in front of them.

The cold night air hit me the second I stepped outside. It was sharp against my skin, biting at my exposed arms, but I barely noticed. My legs carried me forward, past the main entrance, past the streetlights that buzzed faintly above me, and toward the back of the hospital where the car park was nearly empty.

And then, finally, I collapsed.

My back hit the cold wall as I slid down, my legs folding beneath me. My head fell into my hands, my fingers digging into my scalp as I squeezed my eyes shut.

Breathe, Aylah.

But I couldn’t.

Every breath felt heavier than the last. Every inhale was laced with panic, every exhale filled with the unbearable weight of what if.

What if he doesn’t wake up?

What if I never get to hear his stupid teasing again? 

What if I never get the chance to tell him—

I gasped for air, my chest tightening painfully.

This wasn’t supposed to happen.

Jungkook was supposed to pick me up today. He was supposed to show up with that annoying, cocky grin and whatever ridiculous surprise he had planned. He was supposed to drag me along on another adventure, doing whatever he could to win me over.

But instead… instead, he was fighting for his life in a hospital bed, and there was nothing I could do.

A strangled sound escaped my lips as I clutched my head tighter.

I hated this.

I hated feeling so helpless.

I hated that, after everything, I had finally let him back in—finally started to believe that maybe, just maybe, he was different now—only for this to happen.

Tears slipped down my cheeks, hot against my cold skin, and I couldn’t stop them.

I didn’t even try.

I just let myself break.

But then a voice cut through my sobs.

“Wow, what a sight.”

Slowly—almost fearfully—I lifted my head, my pulse thudding in my ears. My vision was still blurred from the tears, but as I blinked rapidly, trying to make sense of the shadowed figure standing just a few feet away, my stomach twisted.

There she was.

Jade.

[kittendreaw]

Has Anyone Else Died For You? | Megumi Fushiguro

00: The Devil Within

Words: 1 k

Mainlist

I made myself at home In the cobwebs and the lies I'm learning all your tricks I can hurt you from inside.

Megumi was never a normal kid, and that was obvious to everyone. He didn’t grow up in a family like the other kids’, and he never bothered to adapt to them either.

He was who he was, and he didn’t care what anyone thought of him.

Megumi didn't know how to love, he didn't know how to be loved and he didn't want to learn it either.

He hated that godforsaken shithole of a town, hated the ignorant people who lived there.

To be fair, he’d always thought moving from Japan to America was a terrible idea, but Satoru insisted it was for the best—a quieter life, far from all the bad memories, blah, blah, blah. Megumi couldn’t change his mind, and now he was stuck there.

Maybe it was the day he broke another kid’s nose for making a xenophobic joke about him, or the time a girl called him satanic because of his style, and he threatened to sacrifice her, or maybe when he called his math teacher a bitch—but Satoru eventually realized Megumi was going to be trouble sooner rather than later.

But no matter how many child psychologists he took him to or how many times he tried to talk to him, Megumi never changed. He never even tried. And he was sure he never would.

He didn’t want to be nicer; he didn’t want to fit in; he didn’t want more friends. All he wanted was to get out of that place, which felt like a prison to him.

Even though his shitty attitude made him an outcast, Megumi was rich and good-looking. He stood out, even if it pissed him off. He was smart and mysterious, with that dark aura wrapped in leather and chains. Maybe he was a troublemaker, but he was also magnetic.

He’d always thought there was nothing interesting about that dump—until he saw you.

Soft and sweet, that’s how you looked. The prettiest girl he’d ever seen. But he immediately noticed there was something else beneath that layer of shyness and charm that had everyone eating out of your hand.

If he were as dumb as the rest of them, he probably would’ve fallen for it too. But he was determined to find out what was hiding underneath all that innocence and kindness that made his blood boil.

Maybe because you were a fake bitch, maybe because he couldn't take his eyes off you.

You were everything he hated, A little saint too good for that people, you were just like all the withered ones who lived there, a liar and a two-faced, but there was something about you that made it impossible for him to get you out of his mind.

You always loved lying—or well, you loved making everyone believe you were someone you weren’t. Some people call it a split personality, others an alter ego, but to you, it just felt like heaven. It’s not that you were a compulsive liar or anything like that; you just liked to sweeten the truth, showing a version of yourself that wasn’t entirely real but wasn’t completely fake either. Something innocent, something that made life easier. Little white lies, that’s what they’re called.

One of your favorite lies was saying you didn’t remember your childhood or your early teenage years. That way, people would stop asking questions. The truth? You remembered everything perfectly. But you were a locked vault, and nothing was ever coming out because now you were someone completely different.

Ignoring that small, miserable part of your life had worked perfectly for you so far. Because, really, was there a sweeter girl in that town? Of course not. You were pretty, sweet, and popular. Everyone’s eyes were on you, and you loved the attention.

It’s not like you were an attention seeker, but honestly, who doesn’t like being noticed? Especially after being completely ignored for so many years. You were finally getting what you’d always wanted, and you weren’t about to let it slip away.

You were shy when people complimented you, a total prude when a guy tried to flirt with you. Smart, always ready to help everyone. In a town so small, where gossip spread faster than wildfire, your reputation was solid. It was something you’d worked hard to build, and that effort had definitely paid off.

You gave everyone what they wanted, You showed them the face they wanted, the version they preferred. You wouldn't call yourself a peoples pleaser because you weren't doing it for them, you were doing it for yourself and the pleasure of knowing that you were the one in control of your own life, of your image, you were in control of saying something and that everyone believed it as the absolute reality.

But of course, nothing lasts forever.

For a couple of years, no one doubted you. You were like a little saint, someone everyone trusted, the good girl everyone wanted to be around.

To yourself, you weren’t a liar or a fraud. You were just someone who had built her own life. Whether it was fake or not, nobody needed to know but you.

You probably could’ve kept weaving your web of lies if it hadn’t been for one stupid fight with your so-called “friends.” One of them accused you of sleeping with her boyfriend, and suddenly, everyone was pointing fingers at you. God, he wasn’t even your type—you’d never do something like that. But all of them turned their backs on you, and the people who used to follow you started following them instead. Now you had a bad reputation.

Your lie had been broken by another lie, the same people who claimed to love you now hated you, the person you had created had been buried by those you had always longed to be with. You’d fallen from your pedestal, the one you’d built brick by brick. But you were determined to climb back up Because that was the place you deserved.

[akiss-from-a-rose]

"I told her while she was sunbathing at the country club that she wasn't a meal on display," Aaliyah said, raising an eyebrow. "I might have also mentioned that to both of you, but, really, I'm not going to spill species secrets around just anyone. That's how I was taught. Was it wrong? Probably." She laughed quietly before rectifying it. "Absolutely." She sighed. "Okay, smart ass. Keep 'um, actually'-ing me, you fucking nerd." She wasn't attempting biting, and she hardly found herself to be defensive. It was mildly amusing, and there was something close to pity, but Aaliyah made it a habit not to really pity anyone. A product of her upbringing, both living and unliving. "Again, you don't know me, Brielle. Very few do, I get that. I go for that. But you can't just state hard facts about me, like who or what I care about, without actually knowing me." She took the clan position because maybe, just maybe, she cared too much. Aaliyah didn't really have the language for it, but she cared deeply about the state of the vampires in this wretched town. Enough to sift out the tough love. Enough to take up the mantle of leader while only really wanting to desperately search for her friend, one of only a handful that she'd ever had in centuries.

Aaliyah just shook her head. "No, you're right, I didn't give you the chance to make a rational decision because we don't get those extra moments, Bri. We don't get the choice of, oh, I'll be a little mad. A human woman not controlling herself? She might yell, maybe hit. Perhaps she could cause some damage. A starving vampire not controlling herself?" She shook her head. "I'm not going to sit in front of the council while those fucking witches drag a clan member through the mud for fucking eating someone at a party. I won't even risk the chance of that happening. So was it rash to grab you? Perhaps. Would I do it again? In a heartbeat. I was protecting the best interest of the clan, I was protecting you, hell. I was protecting your fucking boyfriend from the potentiality of having to listen to your trial while Meena and I have to figure out your punishment. Something that wouldn't have been light for even contemplating hurting the coven advisor's sister." She got what Bri was saying, but there hadn't been much she could do about Jake. "His words were cruel. He was acting out of fear. Does that mitigate it? No. If he doesn't apologize, then I can offer to rip out his tongue, but he also wasn't my priority in that moment. Suck it up in that moment, yes, but wait. Get back at them strategically. I do recall telling you that I didn't want to put you in a box."

Any effort to get through seemed to be a mission in futility. Aaliyah almost didn't understand what she was trying to accomplish. "I'm not trying to be menacing. I'm being honest. You won't like it because it sucks. It will suck. It's not a pun. When you have control issues, when you have feeding problems, it's not easy. It fucking sucks, and it continues to suck for years. I think that you could have an easier time of it than I did. You wouldn't have to deal with my sire, for one. If you think I'm a bitch, then you have no idea. And you have a daylight ring." She was almost wistful, just for a moment. "I missed the sun so much. Longed for it. I used to try and grind up marigolds. I thought if I could put it on my skin, the way that they sooth and heal would help. It didn't. I burned, many times. I was called a fool. She was right, of course, but." She gave Bri a long look. "It doesn't matter if you were or weren't meant to be this. You are this. You have to find a way to live like this."

Aaliyah couldn't help it. She laughed, actually happy. "I'm really not, but it's nice of you to come out of the closet. I have been rather curious if you fight all of Professor anak Bandi's battles for him, even the ones he's unaware of. You were practically ready to break his computer when he was Zooming into council meetings. I've always wondered how human lovers must feel. Do they find themselves as weak as we so often act like they are? Does he need your protection as much as you offer it?" She couldn't help the curiosity, and it was genuine. She'd never stayed with a mortal for so long as to see them as anything more than a temporary fascination. She'd only turned a handful for companionship, but she'd never been especially coddling of any of them. "It's beautiful. Mankind used to spend hundreds, sometimes thousands of years building monuments, cathedrals. Some desperate clawing at permanence. And they are sad. But... ashes to ashes, dust to dust. Whether you're a skull in the wall or dust in the wind, it's sad because they're dead, not because of their eternal resting place." She snorted. "I've lost my touch if the only reason you think I'm a bitch is because I insult your boyfriend. I think I've also kicked your roommate out of my club three times. Her picture's on the wall, now. Do Not Allow Entry. And what is a Shrek?" she asked, like she hadn't seen the movie when it first came out, a fascinating innovation in animation. "I like to think that I have layers like a hornets' nest. Far more applicable." Full of tiny, dangerous little components packed with stinging, hateful creatures.

The irony, in Aaliyah's eyes, was that Brielle was just as set in her own thought processes as she believed everyone else was set in their opinions about her. "I really haven't heard the eulogies. Such a thing is fun in theory, less so in practice. Making an entire town come to a party and then speak about someone that they may not properly know very well is a well intentioned idea that is, more often than not, less than ideal in practice. Besides, I didn't say that everyone in this goddamn town cares about you, I said people. You still have people that care about you. Maybe it's one hundred, maybe it's just one, but that can be enough. And Benjamin has lived here long enough to understand the risks. I remember the former Coalition leader, and I remember that your professor stepped up as soon as he was needed. He loves you, and he loves this town. I don't think something like that is going to do him in." The man had more backbone than she felt obligated to give him credit for. Most humans did. They willingly chose to live in a place where their neighbors had wings or turned into wolves or craved blood. There was an incredibly amount of bravery there.

"I'm not being condescending. I'm not patronizing you. I'm just talking. This is the way I talk, and it's the way I've talked for a while, now. And I'm attempting to get you out of that booth. It worked. But if you want to have a drinking, go for it. Maybe make me a little card. One sip for saying 'fuck.' Down a shot for moral superiority from a confess serial killer," Aaliyah said, laughing a little before she looked at Bri, her eyes a little soft. "If you want an actual funeral, this isn't it. I imagine you didn't get a lot of mourning done in there." Her expression ticked up in amusement as she listed off some of the members of the clan and their various selling points. "She's eccentric. That happens, sometimes. He has cultivated a displeasure for most things. That happens, too. It's nice that they're happy, even if unhelpful. She needs all the rest she can get right now. And you're right, they're both rather new, and the last people I'd wish to get advice from about control are Tried to Eat My Boyfriend's Leg and Had a Sunburn for a Year From Sleeping Outside." She hummed. "No, not a bat signal. We don't turn into bats. Look, I get you might think it's too little, too late. And that's fine. But I work on payroll for Eclipse on Tuesday afternoons. I offered you help with payback at the gift exchange. I'll offer you something similar, now: help with being a vampire, sans neon sign. No non-vampire pals, no busy crowds where I, and most people, really, are so often on defensive. Again, I'm telling you that you probably won't like it. Not to cow you but to let you know that it's just not fun. I didn't like it. I hated it, really, and it took me years to get the hang of this bullshit. But you're much smarter than me."

"Actually you told the both of us during White Elephant two years ago. I was sitting right next to her," She explained. "And I could have, but I trusted you and, as I know now, I shouldn't have," She stated, pressing her lips together as she gave her a small shrug. "It's called a hyperbole. You know, a mild exaggeration for dramatic effect? And I'm well aware when you became advisor. I'm not attacking you. I'm simply pointing out the obvious," She explained calmly. "We both know you don't really care about me, so why bother with the pretend?" Bri reasoned. She already had to question pretty much every relationship in her life. Why add another to the rather long list?

"See. That doesn't exactly sound like you care. Though as for whether or not I would have taken a rational suggestion in that moment, did you even give me a chance to? I lunged at Frankie because she caught me off guard, my emotions got the best of me and I was starving. But, I stopped the moment I-" she paused. Her eyes momentarily drifted to the floor as she muttered under her breath, "Shoved Poppy. Just before you stepped in and, I'm not saying I don't appreciate the advice or the fact that you did, but I also know that, while people came to comfort me, not one actually told him to stop when he was strewing a list of insults my way. Instead, you essentially told me to 'suck it up' and I get it. That's pretty much the only advice anyone ever seems to give around here. 'Suck it up and get over yourself'. But, that doesn't exactly make me want to hang out with other vampires let alone ask them for any other tips. No offense." She had tried to. She had asked Ken to show her how to reverse compulsion and he pretty much rolled his eyes at her and made it abundantly clear she should know how already, though he had been more helpful than most. Ronnie and Safiye were just as lost as she was and Ralph, she was fairly certain was off in some other world.

"And that, right there, is why I've been figuring it out my own. I might have wanted you to teach me control before that ominous as fuck warning? Seriously?" She asked, she shook her head the smallest bit back and forth. "You clearly don't want to help me and I don't even think you could even if I did volunteer for your hellish bootcamp which seems unnecessarily menacing. I was never meant to be this and don't think I haven't notice how my body is still actively rejecting it. I was supposed to die a human and, if it wasn't for the Sheriff's spell, I would have."

"You're awfully defense, you know that?" She pointed out softly, though her voice took on a far sharper tone as she called Ben a 'droll boy toy'. "Though, I'm sorry, a droll boy toy? Go fuck yourself and just because it's art, doesn't mean it's not tacky. While as for catacombs, they're... sad. All of those skeletons piled on top of each other until they practically form of wall of mismatched limbs you can't tell apart from one another? Unless they were some notable official, they become lost amongst the many. Faceless skulls that will go on being unremembered," She wrapped her arms across her chest as she thought of how similar it would have been for her if she hadn't been brought back. No one would have even known where she was buried. "I don't see you as a villain. Maybe, a bit of a bitch, but to be fair, you do like to insult my boyfriend a great deal, so... next you're going to tell me you're like Shrek. An onion with many layers," She mumbled under her breath, not bothering to point out Aaliyah saying that her questions was an 'exercise in self-flagellation' she had outgrown, she was further supporting Bri's entitled bitch theory.

Instead, she stood there quietly. Her gaze hyper-fixated on the crowd with her arms crossed over her chest. It was only when she was told that people cared about her, that she cut Aaliyah off. "No. They don't," Her dark brown eyes met Aaliyah's as she told her, point blank, "You've heard the eulogies. Majority of this town either doesn't give a fuck about me or hates me and they have since the first day I was resurrected. You want to talk about a complaint box? I've been called pretty much every name in the book, not to mentioned was told I smell of death which was an added dose of prejudice for no apparent reason. My friends have forgotten my birthday, stabbed me, mooched off of me, admitted to being afraid of me and fucked my boyfriend before we got together and I do mean plural friends for that one. The only family I have in town left unsure if they'd ever return, knowing they'd forget about me, and they said goodbye for what might have been forever if they hadn't come back over a note. The only person I have in my life who I know for certain loves me unconditionally and would never leave is Ben and he's missing his fucking leg now because of this godforsaken town. So, when I say why bother it is because there is literally no point. I know plenty about myself. I know I've spent the past three years trying to be liked by you god awful people and it doesn't change anything. It doesn't matter how I act. It doesn't matter what I do, all roads end the same. So, why bother? You can call it self-flagellation, if you want to, but I call it me no longer giving a fuck because there are a very few of you who are actually worth it."

"I wasn't in there throwing a fucking pity party. I was saying goodbye to the girl who died, which was originally supposed to be the whole point of this thing," She rolled her eyes as she kicked herself up off of the booth she had been leaning again. "I never had a funeral, though... wow. Are you going to be condescending this entire conversation? Because at this point, I might as well make it into a drinking game," A dry laugh broke from her lips. It was truly ironic how much Aaliyah seemed to think she had a read on the situation. "I've been letting myself 'feel it' for the past three years and I've been to nearly everybody else. Gia's unhinged, Ken barely puts up with me, Ralph and Ernie are still living in 1955, Meena's recovering from being malled by a wolf, Rio's often to busy to even get a coffee let alone fill me in and Saf and Ronnie are just as new at this as I am. So, save the whole 'I've got to want it and seek it out' pep talk. I've been seeking it out. What more do I have to do? Invest in a literal bat signal? Carry around a flashing neon sign that says 'help'?"

[priceofreedom]

#Elmyra approving of Zack makes me so happy 😭 FF7 Rebirth 20 / ?

[itspileofgoodthings]

i love my counselor because she refuses to pry. don’t even know if she knows that’s an option, I have so rarely met a person who stays so thoroughly in her lane.

[quietwingsinthesky]

the amount of time i spend thinking about Even carrying the metacrisis doctor’s fob watch is really quite disproportionate to how much ive fleshed out that part of the story in my head

[sealeneee]

siiiiiiigh

[urlocalmagicalcat]

really long rant (happy rant) in the tags, mostly towards @synthetic-lavender /vpos

romance repulsed aros and romance favourable aros are both cool and valid but because i never see anything about us: shoutout to romance indifferent aros. romance neutral aros. aros who just couldn't care less. aros who have a conflicted relationship with romance. aros who are fine with romance in some contexts but not in others. aros who don't mind romance when it's not amatonormativity being shoved down their throats. aros who haven't yet figured out their feelings about romance. aros to whom romance is Just Something That Exists. y'all are rad as hell and it's okay not to 'pick a side'!!

[insanechayne]

~ ~ ~

[so-sick-of-17]

Someone on TikTok is throwing a fit to me because I made a joke about how I’m obsessed with Lizzie and Hope constantly bringing each other up at unrelated moments. They made a snide remark calling Hope ablest because she called Lizzie emotional. I disagree because Lizzie IS emotional and that is not a bad thing and Hope was calling herself more emotional than Lizzie anyway. I can absolutely see someone taking it the wrong way and would have been fine just disagreeing because I am also very protective of Lizzie and hate the shots made at her expense. But they then argued against Josie being ableist! I love Jo but she was constantly saying something about Lizzie being mentally ill that she shouldn’t have and calling Hope out but defending Josie makes no sense! And then they called me delusional which actually is ableist!

[sinner-as-saint]

scary? my god, you're divine

Hitman/Mob!Bucky x Reader 

Run-through: Your marriage to Bucky Barnes was crucial in stopping the rivalry that had been getting rather violent recently between the two families. You agreed to it. But there was one little problem. Although people knew of Bucky as being a ruthless, fiercely loyal, and feared hitman, no one had ever seen his face. In the rare occasions when he’d been seen out during assignments, it was rumoured that he always wore some sort of mask which covered most of his face. So you ended up marrying a man, and had no idea what he looked like. But surely that wouldn’t be an issue. It’s not like his one touch would get you addicted. Who cared what he looked like? It’s not like you could grow to love someone like him anyway… right? 

Themes: arranged marriage, age gap (reader is in her mid twenties, bucky’s in his late thirties), mentions of violence and death, hitman!Bucky, smut, fluff, explicit language, virgin!reader, HEA

Something woke you up in the middle of the night. 

And you’d been staring at the dark ceiling above your bed for the past few minutes now. What had woken you up? It could’ve been the strong winds hitting the large Georgian windows. Or perhaps it was the soft ticking of the nearby clock. Or maybe even the weight of all the incessant thoughts running through your head. 

Gods, you thought, what a day. 

It had started out like any other. Your father was pacing around, worried and barking orders on the phone, trying to find a way to put a stop to this chaos that was quickly forming into a full war between him and his number one rival. Small attacks had turned to frequent drive-bys, threats had turned into taking turns and blowing up each other’s warehouses and clubs. And it would only get worse and worse. 

But this morning, as he watched you come downstairs and into the dining room for breakfast, something in his eyes was different. And you could tell what was coming. You had been thinking about this for days. So when he sat you down and discussed how you could do your part in helping to put an end to all of this. 

“It’s only a matter of time before he sends his son, his favourite weapon after us all,” Your father sounded defeated. “And none of us would survive him. No one ever does. You know that.” 

You nodded, understanding what he meant. “I know.” 

The son of your father’s rival, Bucky Barnes, was a name which could make even powerful men like your father tremble in fear. He was like a ghost. No one ever saw him. No one knew what he looked like. Those who had seen him claimed that he always wore a muzzle-like mask to conceal his identity. He was known for being his father’s most prized weapon. They say he never misses, that his aim is and has always been as sure as Eros’ arrows. He was like an evil Cupid. 

“The marriage would only be on paper of course, you don’t have to live with him.” Your father explained, seeming desolated, “But you being married to him would make us family, and…” He trailed off, sighing. 

But you knew what he meant. Family meant everything in this society. If your family and the rival’s were joined to each other by marriage, all attacks would cease. Because keeping family safe was everyone’s number one priority, even in this line of work. 

So this was all up to you now. Your family’s safety, the safety of people who worked with and for your father, all the allies, and friends, and acquaintances. It was a heavy weight to carry. 

“I’ll do it.” 

Things happened so quickly after that. Phone calls were had, arrangements and deals were made, and by the afternoon, a sheet of paper was brought to you. That’s it. No groom, no fancy shit. Just a piece of paper on which Bucky Barnes had already signed. And with your signature added next to his, you two were now forever husband and wife by law. 

It was weird, being married to a man you had never seen before. He was just a name. Granted, a name with immense magnitude in the society, but still just a name. No face to go with it. 

By the evening, your things were packed. It was an order by your new husband. He wanted his new bride in his home, and things were so freshly mended that neither you nor your father wanted to argue. So Bucky sent cars and a bunch of his soldiers to escort you to his house. It was not unexpected that he was so absent from all this. Bucky Barnes had a reputation of living in the shadows. He was so rarely seen.

Bucky’s house was not too far from your family home. In fact, the closer you got to your new home, the more you realised that despite everything, you did not mind this as much as you thought you would. 

Your husband’s home was this stunning piece of architecture. A lavish Georgian-style mansion. Beige stone, carved details and mouldings around the many windows and main entrance. Dark shingles on the roof, well-manicured lawn, a long driveway giving it a sense of both elegance and exclusivity. The mansion sat on a beautiful, seemingly endless estate. Lush and green. It was a testament to the wealth and the power of its owner. 

You were politely led inside the home by one of the many staff members who took care of the house. And the interior was just as breathtaking. Luxurious, with the right amount of vintage accents. 

“We did what we could with the limited time we had to prepare a room for you.” The kind lady had said to you. She also mentioned that this room would be entirely yours. Bucky apparently had his own on the other side of the mansion. 

You murmured that it was alright, and when she finally showed you to the room they had ready for you, you were pleasantly impressed. The layout, the colour theme, the decor, all of it was to your liking. You even had a personal little balcony which looked over the endless green backyard. 

That night you dined alone, which was not a surprise. Everyone knew Bucky Barnes was a busy man, and he was apparently above trivial things like dining with his new wife. But the silence was welcomed. After dinner you found yourself back in your bedroom, and soon in bed with a book. 

Well, maybe this was your new life now. Grand mansion with an impressive library. Solo dinners and kind staff members. A giant, dreamy bedroom all for you. Dare you say, it wasn’t too bad. 

–

But here you were now, unable to fall back asleep after some mysterious thing woke you up. You sighed, sitting up and leaning against the headboard. You couldn’t even blame your new surroundings for your inability to sleep. Everything here was so quiet, and comfortable. Even this new bed felt like laying on the fluffiest cloud. Perhaps you could read some more–

You froze when you heard it. 

Someone breathing. Someone else’s breaths. A soft exhale, but it was enough to make your heart race in panic. It was the middle of the night. And there was someone in this dark room with you. 

Slowly, you tried to reach for the lamp on your bedside table to turn it on, but then you heard a voice say, “Don’t.” 

A smooth, relaxed, male voice. Sounding like it came from one corner of the room. It could only be one man, couldn’t it? 

“Bucky?” You questioned, for some reasons pulling the covers up to your chin as if he was not a man but a ghost. 

A pause, then he said, like he was gently teasing you, “Hello, wife. Can’t sleep?” 

You blinked a few times to adjust to the darkness better. You strained your eyes until you could see the silhouette of a man in the corner of the room. He was sitting in one of the sofas near the unlit fireplace, quiet, still like a marble statue. 

There was almost no light coming into the room. The thick curtains allowed very little moonlight in, and it was hard to see. But you couldn’t ignore that large silhouette now that you’d noticed him. Something near him was shiny, almost metal like, you couldn’t tell what it was. 

“Do you always lurk around in the shadows like a ghost?” You asked, wondering where the hell you found the confidence to talk to one of the finest hitmen like this. It’s not like he would shoot you if he didn’t like you. A small voice said. Would he? 

A chuckle. Deep, and careless. A boyish sound. 

“It’s my house,” He responded in that same gentle but teasing tone, “I lurk wherever I please.” 

Well, he did have a point there. 

“Well then,” You said in a casual tone, “If you’re done lurking and spying on me, I’d like to go back to bed.” 

A soft scoff. Then he said, “I’ve watched you toss and turn for the past half an hour. I’d say you’re having trouble turning your brain off.” 

Half an hour?! 

“Wouldn’t you?” You retorted, keeping your voice calm and steady. “If you were forced to marry someone who’s so mysterious that no one’s ever seen them before, wouldn’t you have some trouble turning your brain off?” 

“Ah.” He got up, and you could tell by the sound of his footsteps that he was approaching the bed, “No one forced you to marry me. A suggestion was made and you agreed to it.” 

You replied quickly, “The alternative was watching everyone I love and myself be murdered by you, so semantics.” 

Another chuckle as he stopped at the edge of the bed, so close to you. You refused to move. You tilted your head up but could still only see his silhouette. He spoke in that teasing tone again, “They said you were smart, and beautiful. Guess they forgot to mention you were bratty too.” 

You frowned. “What?” 

Silence. Then he began moving away from your bed and towards the door. “Good night, wife.” 

“Good night,” You muttered, slightly annoyed and confused, “Ghost.” 

You heard his soft chuckle right as he shut the door behind him and left you all alone again in the dark. You didn’t dare turn the lamp on even after he left. 

— 

“Is Bucky ever home?” 

You asked one of the staff members at breakfast the next morning. The lady smiled at you and answered, “He keeps to himself. We rarely ever know if he’s home or not. He works at odd hours, you see? Besides, our job is to take care of the house. We clean, we make the meals and leave them in the fridge, we get our paychecks each month. Everyone is happy. We don’t pry.” 

You nodded, sipping on some tea. “So… are you one of the people who don’t know what he looks like?” 

“Oh no. I saw him recently.” She said, smiling. 

“How recent?” You asked. 

“A couple of months ago. He’s a busy man, he’s rarely ever home.” 

Unbelievable. 

“Doesn’t it feel like you’re employed by a ghost?” 

She smiled again, refilled your cup and said, “Oh, we’re used to Mr. Barnes. Sure, sometimes it feels like the house is way too empty. But look, now you’re here! We get to take proper care of someone for once.” 

She was so cheery and kind that you couldn’t help but smile at her words. How on earth did a man that grim manage to have the best staff members in the whole world? 

— 

The following night, Bucky came to see you again. 

You woke up upon hearing the door of your bedroom opening. You sat up again, leaning against the headboard. You didn’t reach for the lamp on your bedside table this time. Instead you said, “Lurking again, I see.” 

“Oh yes,” He answered, taking a seat on the same sofa by the dark fireplace. “How was your day, wife?” He asked, as if this was the most normal way to have a conversation. 

“Good.” You said, “I spoke with your staff members. They say they barely ever see you at home.” 

He sighed, “I barely ever am at home.” 

You rolled your eyes even though you knew he couldn’t see it. He was too… intangible. Faceless. There was nothing you knew about him aside from his profession. And not knowing was starting to annoy you. 

“Why can’t I see you?” You asked. “I mean it’s not fair. I married you. I’ll eventually see you someday.” 

He was silent for a moment. Then asked, “Will you?” 

“Well, yes.” 

“What for?” There was that teasing tone again. So subtle. But it was there. 

Your face burned. “Well… we’re married.” You stated the obvious. “And it won’t be long till our families start asking for, you know, grandbabies.” 

“Babies can be made in the dark.” His smooth voice felt like a gentle caress. Like the finest, cool silk sliding over your warm body… 

Oh no. You can’t like his voice. Not yet. 

“That’s not what I–,” You sighed, “Why are you so against showing your face? Are you ugly?” 

He chuckled then. Loudly, if you could see him you’d surely see his shoulders shaking. “You think too much, wife.” He got up again, ready to leave. “Good night.” 

You sighed, defeated, and listened to the sounds of him leaving the room. Then almost angrily whispered, “Good night, husband.” 

—

“It’s because he’s ugly, isn’t it?” You asked two of the staff members one morning while they set the table for your breakfast. “That’s why he doesn’t show his face?” 

The two ladies chuckled to themselves, and one of them said, “No he isn’t.” She sounded confident too. 

“Have you seen his face? Like properly?” 

They both nodded. 

“And? You don’t find it weird that he doesn’t show his face?” You questioned. “He refuses to let me see him. He only comes to talk to me in the dark. Like some messed up Eros.” You whispered the last part to yourself. 

One of the ladies said, gently, “Give him time. He’s not… terrible.” 

— 

“Your staff speaks highly of you.” You said to him when he came to see you that night. Again, sat in that corner like a ghost whose only purpose was to haunt your bedroom specifically. 

“Do they?” 

“Yes,” You made yourself comfortable, leaning against the headboard like you had the habit of doing. “Do you pay them to sing your praises?” 

He chuckled. “Is it that hard to believe that I’m not some sort of monster?” 

You sighed. “If not then why can’t I see you?” 

“Not yet.” He said. 

“Why?” 

“Because I said so.” He replied, and by the sounds of it, he stood up. Surely ready to leave. “Now, is there anything you need?” 

You tried to see if you could tell where he was standing but the room was too dark. However, it seemed like, judging by the sound of footsteps, that he’d gotten closer to the end of your bed. “There’s nothing to do around the house. The ladies take care of everything. I appreciate the library, but…” 

He was quiet, like he was thinking. Then said, “I’ll see to it.” 

“I’m assuming you won’t let me go back to work in my family’s companies.” You could tell he wouldn’t. 

“No,” He said, as expected. “You’re my wife now. I’m well equipped to provide for you and see to your needs for the rest of our lives. But if you have any hobbies, please, indulge away.” 

Something about his calm tone made you confess your little secret, “I like to paint. I’ve always wanted to be an artist.” 

You didn’t know why you were telling him all this. Perhaps the dark helped you open up better. Maybe the fact that you didn’t know him made it easier to talk. Like how people tend to prefer texting over calls. Him being so invisible made it so much more effortless. 

You continued, “I always wonder what it must be like to have an exhibition of my works.” You chuckled. “I know it sounds vain but… I’ve always wanted to let my mind and soul leak all over canvases, and share it with the world. I think it’s such a brave thing when people do that.” 

He was quiet for a few seconds, then spoke in that teasing tone, “Painting, huh?” 

You rolled your eyes. “You don’t get to make fun of me, ghost.” 

He chuckled. “Get some sleep, wife.” 

And then he left. 

— 

The following morning, you woke up to two surprises. 

The first one was waiting for you at the breakfast table. You noticed the box on the floor immediately. It was partially opened, and had a note stuck to it. 

The note read: ‘Since there’s nothing to do around the house…’ written in a messy handwriting. Surely Bucky’s. 

You opened the box and in there, on a folded blanket, was a sleeping, fluffy little puppy. A black lab it seemed. With a pink collar around her neck. You gasped as you gently picked it up and couldn’t resist bringing it up to your face. Puppies always smelt so good. 

The little one yawned and let out some cute noises as you held her up to look at her properly. By now the two ladies whom you saw frequently around the house walked up to you and one of them said, “He left something else for you.” 

You followed the ladies, new puppy in hand, and they led you to what seemed like a newly built studio. It was in an area of the mansion where you didn’t go very often. And as you walked in, you gasped in surprise for the second time that morning. 

It was located on the ground floor. A bright and spacious space. The beige walls felt like a giant blank canvas in itself. The large Georgian windows allowed the perfect amount of light in. And everything in the room was neatly organised. Art supplies, paints, canvases, palettes, easels. 

Oh, it was perfect. 

The ladies left you to explore on your own, saying something about bringing you breakfast in here. But you were distracted by the bright yellow sticky note on one of the easels. You walked up to it and it read: ‘For your mind and soul to leak all over. Paint me something. I’ll consider it a wedding gift.’ 

You couldn’t help the smile on your face as you read and re-read the note left by your mysterious husband. You whispered to your sleeping puppy, “Maybe our ghost isn’t so bad, huh?” 

-

Hours went by. 

The ladies brought you and the puppy your meals, a bed for the pup, snacks for you, all while you were busy letting your creativity flow as much as possible. 

The first few canvases were horrible according to you. You hadn’t picked up a paintbrush in so long so it felt like day one all over again. But gradually, over the next few canvases, you could see what your brain was trying to create. 

The blank canvas soon turned into flowy shapes. Curves, facial features, hands. Entwining bodies. Two of them. And the colour purple, lots of it. It didn’t make too much sense at first, but the more you worked on it the more you realised what you were painting. 

It was your version of ‘The Abduction of Psyche’. How fitting. 

By the time you were done and happy with it, your back was aching from sitting on that stool all day. It was almost time for dinner. The sun had set. The puppy was awake so you held her up to show her the canvas and asked, “You think our ghost will like it?” 

She let out the tiniest, softest howl. 

“Yeah, I think so too.” 

You left to shower and have dinner. Then once it was time for bed you asked one of the staff members, “Does Bucky have some kind of an office?” 

She replied saying yes he does, and that she could show you where it was. You grabbed the not yet dry canvas and carefully carried it all the way to where Bucky’s office was. The lady again left you all by yourself to explore. 

At first you didn’t want to spend too much time in there. It was Bucky’s space after all. But then you thought, if he was comfortable walking into your bedroom at odd times during the night, why shouldn’t you check out his office? 

So you did. You left the canvas where it could dry without any problem and where Bucky would see it upon entering the room. Then you began exploring. The room was not what you were expecting for someone like Bucky. You thought it would be less… old school. 

He had a vintage looking typewriter on his desk for gods’ sake. Not one he used of course, but it added layers to his character you thought. Dark wooden furniture, comfortable looking chairs, more bookshelves filled with cloth-bound books. It was… cosy. 

So cosy in fact that you grabbed a book and made yourself comfortable on one of the chairs. You’d read for an hour or so then head off to bed, you thought. 

But soon, you drifted off to sleep. Right there. In Bucky’s office. 

-

You woke up and felt something soft and fluffy moving around on your lap. You opened your eyes and quickly realised you weren’t in bed. The room was dark. With very little light coming in from the outside. There were no curtains in this room, but also it was situated in an area of the mansion where very little moonlight came in.

Before you could panic though, a voice spoke up from not too far away, “You’ve been busy today, I see.” 

Ah, Bucky. And fuck. You’d fallen asleep in his office. 

You refused to feel embarrassed. So you asked, “Did you like your wedding gift?” 

“Yes.” He replied, and gauging by the sound you could tell he was sitting at his desk, in the darkest corner of the room. “I’ll hang it in my office.” 

You smiled in the dark, feeling a little proud of yourself. “And where’s my wedding gift?” 

“In your lap.” 

Fair. 

“What should we name her?” You asked, reaching to caress your puppy who let out an adorable grunt. “Hedone? Donnie, for short?” 

He let out a chuckle. “You are really leaning into this whole Eros-Psyche thing, huh?” 

You shrugged. “Well, I wouldn’t have to if you’d just show me your face. But you keep choosing not to, so deal with it.” 

A pause. Then he asked, “You like your new studio?” 

That made you sit up straighter. “I love it. Thank you.” Then you added, “My family always thought painting was a waste of time. They said it kept my head in the clouds too much. That it was… pointless.” 

He was quick to say, “It’s not. Besides, your hobbies don’t have to make sense to anyone else but yourself. And I’ve seen the other canvases you left in the studio. They’re good.” 

You turned to face the dark corner he was in. “You think?” 

“Yes,” He said. “We can hold an exhibition if you want. Let me know when you’re ready.” 

You let out a surprised chuckle. And when he didn’t laugh you realised he was serious. “Bucky, it's not so easy.” You explained calmly. “There’s so much work that goes into it, there needs to be some cohesion to the art pieces. There’s marketing, there’s research, there’s…” You exhaled, “There’s a lot of work to be done. Art exhibitions aren’t as easy or quick as you think it is.” 

He replied, “Leave all that to me. Just let me know when you want to hold one.” 

Just like that? 

“I… okay.” 

You felt warm in a way you’d never felt before. No one had ever taken your interests so seriously before. You’d never even been able to discuss this freely about your hobbies. And here Bucky was, ready to listen and interact with it. 

You got up to leave because this was… a lot to process. “Well then. Good night, Bucky.” 

A soft scoff. “Think I liked it more when you called me a ghost.” 

You smiled as you approached the door, puppy in hand and amazed at how well you were able to navigate in the dark. “Night, ghost.” 

He gave you a satisfied hum, then, “Good night, wife.” 

— 

It was bizarre to admit but you’d gotten used to those conversations in the dark with your husband. Days went by quickly given how engrossed you were with painting. Especially with the thought of a potential exhibition now in the back of your mind. Gods, that would be a dream. 

And while your days consisted of painting, playing and training your puppy, exploring more and more of the grounds and your new home, making quick trips to the stores to get more supplies, catching up with your friends who were still trying to grasp the fact that you got married so quickly, getting to know the household staff and the guards better, your night consisted of waiting and fighting your sleep until Bucky came to talk to you. 

It was always short conversations. Filled with easy banter and teasing tones, sarcastic comments and you asking each and every night if he was in the mood to show his face. Bucky always said no. And you always sent him off with a ‘good night, ghost’. 

You had gotten used to your ghost. As had your puppy. She would bark happily each time Bucky would enter your bedroom door at night. She’d run to him for playtime and cuddles as he sat in his dark corner and spoke with you until you fell asleep. 

Bucky would often leave you some kind of a note, for you to read in the morning. At the breakfast table, or in your studio. Sometimes he would leave compliments and comments on your dry canvases. Eventually, you stopped fighting the smiles which formed on your face as you read his notes. 

But all of it only made you want to see him more. Not that it would change anything. Bucky had quickly become… a friend, you’d say. A confidant if you will. He had become a habit. Part of your routine. 

And then one night, he didn’t come to see you. 

You waited. He usually came around midnight. It was well past 2 a.m. and he never came. 

At some point you went downstairs, pretending as if you just needed some water. One of the guards caught you trying to peek out into the driveway from the kitchen window. 

“Boss is not home yet, ma’am.” He said. 

You acted like you didn’t care. But still asked, “He does this often?” 

“Sometimes.” 

You nodded. You took your drink and with your puppy in your arms you walked back upstairs, passing by the many guards who were on duty inside the house at nighttime. 

“It’s alright, he’s probably just busy.” You whispered to the sleeping pup as you made your way up. “Or maybe he’s hurt and tending to his wounds somewhere else.” You felt a gentle pinch in your chest at the thought of Bucky hurt and alone out there. So you forced yourself to think of something else. Something way worse. “Or maybe he’s with someone else.” You scoffed, nuzzling the soft fur of your pup, “This marriage means nothing to him anyway. But that’s alright, we don’t need him. I’ve got you. We’ve got each other. Don’t we?” 

Safe to say, you went to bed slightly annoyed that night. And in denial too because you refused to admit that you missed him. 

– 

There was a note waiting for you in your studio the next morning. 

It read: ‘No I did not spend the night with someone else. I’ll explain later. See you tonight, wife.’ 

Huh. Looks like the guards have really good ears. 

Well, whatever. It’s not like you were impatiently waiting for night to come just so you could talk to your ghost of a husband. Right? 

Except you were though. So much that you couldn’t paint a decent thing. You were easily giving up on each canvas, and leaving a trail of unfinished work the more time went on. 

Eventually you sighed and left the studio. You tried reading but that wasn’t happening either. So you did the only thing you knew would take your mind off things. You asked the ladies to show you where everything was kept in the kitchen and you got to baking. 

Which you did until it was time for bed. Your mood was off, and it was all because of a faceless man. And that somehow annoyed you even more. 

You grabbed a plate of the mini muffins you’d made earlier and made your way upstairs. Your puppy had just gotten used to the stairs so she happily followed you everywhere you went now. 

You proceeded to sit in bed, and eat your muffins angrily and forced yourself to try to sleep. 

-

You woke up sometime later. And you just knew who was in the room with you. 

Except he wasn’t in his usual spot. 

He was standing by the windows which faced your bed this time, with his back to you. The curtains were pulled, the moonlight came and there was his dark silhouette. And… you frowned as you noticed the shiny metal arm. 

“You’re home.” You said. 

Bucky turned his head to the side, “I am.” He said. 

You took a second or two to admire the side profile. With the moonlight shining all around his silhouette he looked like a fallen angel of sorts. “You didn’t come home last night.” 

“I was out working,” He said. 

“Maiming and killing?” 

“You know me so well.” 

“Is that a… metal arm?” You questioned. 

“It is.”  

“Were you hurt?” 

“I was.” 

You sighed again. “Is it always going to be bland answers and mystery with you?” 

“Get used to it.” He said in that teasing tone. 

You got out of bed as quietly as you could. “I think I liked you better without the attitude, when you sat in the corner like a ghost.” You took some steps away from the bed, approaching the giant windows. The room was rather spacious so it would take some more steps to get close to him. If you’d only– 

“Don’t think I don’t know what you’re trying to do.” He warned, but remained in the same spot. 

You groaned. “Don’t you think this is getting tiring? I mean, I’m married to a man I’ve never seen before. In fact, no one has ever seen you. Why? What are you hiding?” You added, sounding defeated.  

Bucky lowered his head, which only accentuated how broad his shoulders really were. He sighed. “Do you know how much trouble could’ve been avoided if only Psyche trusted Eros?” 

You rolled your eyes. “I think she had her reasons. A mysterious, faceless lover who only shows up in the dark and hides in the shadows is bound to raise some doubts. Don’t you think so?” 

He chuckled. You blinked and he’d turned around to face you. But despite that, you couldn’t see his face at all. Even though he was inches away. 

He was quiet. Observing you with interest. The moonlight allowed him to see all of you, and he just… stared for a moment or two. A shiver ran down your back. An unfamiliar, but pleasant shiver. 

Without a word said, Bucky reached out and gently touched the thin strap of your silky night dress resting on your shoulder. His metal finger gliding along your skin and making you gasp at his cold touch. 

“What’s this?” He asked in his usual teasing tone. “Trying to tempt me with this excuse of a night dress, wife?” 

Fuck. Had his voice dropped lower? 

Fuck! He was so close to you. You didn’t even notice that your heart had begun racing. Your breaths had deepened. Shit. Why was this so hot?! 

“Are you? Tempted?” You asked with a steady voice, without thinking obviously. You just needed to say something so he wouldn’t notice the way you were basically panting after him like a thirsty dog. 

He chuckled. But remained quiet. 

So you said, “Thought so.” You sounded smug but you were feeling the complete opposite. 

Bucky scoffed in that arrogant way he often did. It was insane how easily you were able to pick up on his mannerism when you hadn’t even known him for that long. “Is that what you think? That I don’t want to sleep with you?” 

Oh. 

Oh this was bad. Because now your brain was making up hot, steamy scenes in your head. Scenes involving you and your faceless, mysterious husband in the dark. Entwining bodies on soft bed sheets. Fuck, you should paint that. No, what?  

“Then why haven’t you?” You found yourself asking. 

Okay then, bold as fuck it is. You’d gone past the point of no return now. Guess it was time for this conversation. 

Bucky’s fingers remained on your shoulder, tracing the thin strap there. And you couldn’t see it, but you could hear the smirk in his voice when he asked, “You want me to?” His metal hand dropped to your waist and before you could fully process it, he pulled you closer, leaned in to whisper into your ear, “You want my hands all over you, wife?” 

You could feel his slight stubble against your skin as he spoke. His lips brushing against your ear, making you gasp and tremble. Your hands found their way to his shoulders. And oh, he was pulling you even closer. Your chest pressing against his. The cool material of his suit felt amazing against your warm skin. 

“Look at you,” He cooed into your ear. “Is this what you want? Hmm?” He placed both his hands on your waist, pulling you into him. His lips moved lower, brushing against your neck as he spoke. “You like how rough my hands feel?” He moved his hands up and down your sides. “Do you know how many people I’ve hurt with these hands?” He chuckled when he heard the tiniest moan leave your mouth. “You’re so soft and warm, aren’t you worried what these hands might do to you?” 

He nuzzled your neck, hands roaming all over your sides and back and squeezing your butt. You became so pliant under his touch. Tilting your head back to allow him to kiss all over your neck, pressing your chest more and more against his like you couldn’t get enough. The layers of clothing, you wanted them gone. 

With a shaky voice you murmured, “I can’t tell if you’re trying to scare me or turn me on.” 

He laughed. And it was the best sound you’d ever heard. 

“You’re sick in that pretty head, huh?” He teased. “That beautiful brain is filled with filthy, dirty, dark thoughts, isn’t it?” His metal hand reached up and carefully wrapped around your throat. 

You gasped as he squeezed just a little bit. Those dirty thoughts he spoke about really started to fill your head. 

“Are you just all talk or–,” 

He cut you off by dragging you all the way to your bed, still holding you by the throat. 

The back of your knees hit the edge of the bed and he gave you a slight push, ending with you falling onto your bed on your back. You looked up at him, hovering above you, his lower body pressing into yours. 

“Do you just run that mouth?,” He asked, supporting himself with one hand while the metal one remained wrapped around your throat, his voice low and menacing but in a way that made your legs part on their own so his hips settled in between them. Your bodies fit together like the most perfect puzzle pieces. “Or do you know how to take it like a brat as well?” 

You felt the need to let him know then. “I don’t know,” You said, sounding both breathless and bratty. “I’ve never had to take it.” 

He paused for a moment. Then asked in subtle surprise, “What do you mean?” Even his grip around your throat loosened completely. 

You squirmed in slight embarrassment but that only caused your hips to grind against his and for a moment there both of you let out a strained moan. Fuck. The tension between the two of you was almost physical now. Even in the dark, even with Bucky being nothing more than just a shadow above you. 

“I, uh…” You cleared your throat, still feeling his cold fingers all over your skin, “I’ve never been with anyone before.” 

He was quiet. As if thinking. You tried your hardest but you couldn’t see any of his facial features. You knew he had a slight stubble because you’d felt it earlier. But aside from that, you knew nothing. Not even his eye colour. 

“You want us to stop?” He asked, shifting his body slightly as if he was ready to pull away if you asked him to. 

“No,” You answered way too quickly. Then you got bold again and let your hands find their way back to his shoulders. You pulled him down, closer to you just a little and said, “This is okay.” 

His fingers moved up, from your neck to your mouth. “Yeah? You want this, huh?” He mumbled, tracing your mouth with his fingers. You shivered under his touch. “You’ve been a whiny little brat lately, haven’t you, wife? Pouting and all just because I wouldn’t show myself to you.” He whispered, leaning in to just brush his lips against yours. You gasped at the sensation of his soft lips rubbing against yours. Bucky chuckled at your reaction. “Don’t think my staff doesn’t report back to me. I’ve been well aware of all the times you asked the ladies to give you details about me.” 

Now that made you squirm in embarrassment. Still you said, sounding a little annoyed at being caught. “Can you blame me?”

“Can’t you just trust me?” He argued. 

The danger and authority in his tone had your thighs clenching together to try and alleviate the torturous pain in between your legs. You were almost certain you had never been this turned on and annoyed at the same damn time before. You sighed in frustration. “This isn’t fair.” 

“No, it isn’t,” He said, pulling away and began undressing you to your pleasant surprise. “Deal with it.” 

Oh fuck. 

Fuck… You had to hold back from whimpering each time his hands rubbed against your skin. He took his time in sliding the straps of your night dress down your shoulders, dragging the silky fabric down your body, leaving you more and more naked under him. 

You shivered once he left your night dress bunched around your waist carelessly. It wasn’t just because of the slightly cold air. It was because even though you couldn’t see him, you could tell he was staring right at you. 

You spoke in a hushed voice, not daring to speak loud in fear that it might break whatever spell you were under. “So you get to see me naked all you want, but I can’t see your face?” 

He chuckled. “You want me to leave this room right now? Leave you here all wet and squirming? Or do you want me to take care of it and make you come? Huh?” 

That shut you up really quickly. 

“I thought so.” He sounded smug again when he said that. “I should spank you for the brat you are. But since it’s your first time… I’ll be nice.” 

His hands touched you everywhere, your thighs, your stomach, your sides, your chest, your neck… everywhere. He left you gasping and trembling under him. 

“Please.” You caught yourself whispering. 

Bucky leaned down, his soft mouth brushing against your cheek as he said, “Please what?” 

You squirmed, “Touch me, please.” 

He chuckled. You felt his warm breath against your skin as he kissed his way down your naked body. “Look at you,” He murmured, lips brushing against your stomach, “You’re so eager already.” 

You heard the faint chuckle which left his mouth the moment he noticed your legs spread apart for him naturally. Your face felt like it was burning but fuck, you were too turned on to even be properly embarrassed. Also, being in complete darkness helped. 

Damn. You were really getting intimate with your husband whom you hadn’t even seen yet. And somehow that fact was making you want this even more. 

But that mystery stopped being an issue the moment Bucky leaned in and kissed your wet folds, his tongue slowly circling around your throbbing clit and licking down, parting your wet folds with ease.

He poked at your entrance with his tongue and your body felt hotter than before. Back arching off the bed as you let out a soft moan at the foreign feeling. Fuck he felt good. You whimpered as you felt his tongue stroke your most sensitive parts. Your immediate reaction was to pull your hips back from the overwhelmingly good sensation his mouth was causing. And that made him grip your thighs tighter, keeping them pinned to the bed. 

“Stop moving.” He ordered and the authority in his voice made you tremble. 

You whined as you felt his strong arms wrapped around your thighs, keeping you in place and close to his mouth. The metal hand on your warm skin made you shiver and tremble so much that you were thankful for the darkness. 

The small amount of moonlight which came in allowed you to only see the silhouette of his broad shoulders, and his head moving slowly, sensually in between your legs. Fuck… somehow the mystery only made it hotter.

Oh you were fucked in the head for real. 

And oh, Bucky was a fucking tease. Once he noticed how easily you cried out and moaned for him, he slowed down and began kissing around your clit just to purposely mess with you. He kissed your thighs, purposely avoiding touching where he knew you needed him the most. He kissed down all the way to your core, and gently bit your skin around your inner thighs. 

“Bucky, please!” You cried out, hand reaching for his hair. When you managed to grab a fistful of his soft hair, you gave it a gentle tug. “Stop teasing me.” 

“You don’t get to give me orders, wife.” He said, sounding all proud and mighty. “I could just walk out of here and leave you like this. Naked and squirming.” 

“Please,” You begged again. You could feel your arousal trickling out of you. 

A scoff. Then he leaned in again. You whined and whimpered under him, with your legs wrapped around his head. Fingers in his hair, massaging his scalp instinctively as he flicked, and sucked, and teasing your clit as much as he could. 

“You’ve been a brat because you wanted your husband’s attention so badly, huh?” He taunted. “Is that what you wanted? Just my attention?” He chuckled. “You’re as calm as a happy kitten now, aren’t you?” 

His stubble rubbed against your sensitive skin, and the friction burned a little but it was the kind of pain you kept wanting more of. You wanted more of him. 

“Fuck, your mouth feels so good,” You murmured, throwing your head back, moaning as he kept teasing your entrance with the tip of his tongue. 

“Come for me, wife.” His hands wrapped around your thighs, securing you in his grip as he pushed his face further into you, making you cry out loud. 

You couldn’t even hold on for much longer, and ended up coming undone all over his tongue. Heart racing, legs trembling in his grip as you came. Your moans were soft and incessant. 

Fuck… that felt amazing. 

You had barely gotten your heart to stop racing, and Bucky was already standing up and in the dark you couldn’t see very well but it did look like he was moving away from the bed. 

“You’re leaving?” You asked, unable to stop yourself from sounding a little upset at his departure. 

All he said was, “Good night, wife. See you tomorrow.” 

You scoffed after he shut the door behind him, leaving you in darkness yet again. “Ghost.” 

— 

That night ended up being the first of many. 

Your days consisted of painting, and finally finding a flow in most of your pieces. Perhaps if you’re able to make a decent collection, you could start thinking about the exhibition seriously, you thought. When you weren’t painting you were either training your rapidly growing puppy, or baking. You’d begun taking your puppy out for walks around the mansion, consequently doing some more exploring of the grounds. 

After all that, each night you’d get in bed and wait for Bucky. It became part of your routine. And each night with him was different. He’d spend his time touching you slowly until you were purring for him like a kitten. Kissing you all over your body in the dark. Making you come all over his tongue and fingers. Kissing you until you moaned and pulled him closer just to feel his weight pressing down on you. 

But he would always leave after making you come. And you two never actually fucked. Neither would he let you make him come. 

On nights when he wouldn’t make it home, you’d worry yourself to sleep. But then each morning you’d find a note from him either in your studio or the breakfast table. He would always say some cheesy shit. And he would always promise to come see you later that night. 

On nights when you two didn’t engage in anything sexual, it was still just as fulfilling. Bucky would tell you things about his work, his past, his family. You learnt that he was over a decade older than you, and teased him about being an old man until he pinned you to the bed and tickled you until you couldn’t breathe. 

You learnt that he liked to keep to himself and stay as far away from his family as possible. He liked peace and quiet, which would explain his lovely home being here away from most people. 

The more you learned about him, the easier it was to grow fond of him. But the more you grew fond of him, the greedier you got. You wanted more. More of his time, his touch, his attention, and most of all, you wanted to see him. 

The mystery, while hot as fuck, was killing you. 

—

One night, things changed. 

Bucky came into your room as usual. He’d gotten bolder lately, he wouldn’t sit in the corner like a ghost anymore, instead he would find his way to your bed and only leave that bed after making you come hard. 

Tonight started out the same way.  

You felt his hands all over you as he pulled you closer to him under the covers. You giggled as he bit and licked that one sensitive spot on your neck. Your fingers had a habit of finding themselves in his hair. It was insane how easily you’d gotten used to being with him in the dark. How easily you could find his mouth with your own. How easily you’d find your way into his arms. 

It was weirdly comforting. His warmth, his voice, his touch. 

“Tell me about your day,” He murmured, kissing your neck while his hands grabbed you and caressed you wherever he could reach. 

You squealed when you felt his metal fingers wandering dangerously close to your clit. Then said, “It went pretty well. I went out to buy some supplies, made a new friend at the store, I went to see my father but he wasn’t home. I took our dog for a walk, I painted…,” You gasped when his mouth trailed down till he took a nipple into his warm mouth, while he slid two fingers inside you gently. “Oh fuck…” You whined. 

He kissed his way up to your mouth again and said, “You sound so good when you moan for me, wife.” His lips brushed against yours. 

He was so close. And it was dark. And you wanted so desperately to see him. 

He moved his fingers expertly in and out of you. Making sure to brush against your most sensitive spots each time, turning you into a whimpering mess under him. He gave you a gentle kiss, swallowing your moans as he brought you closer to the edge. 

You whimpered and whined, then in the moment you just blurted out, “Can I please see you now?” 

Bucky stopped. He pulled away from you, making you whimper again as he got up and got out of your bed. 

In the dark it took a while for you to figure out where he was, whether he was still nearby or already making his way out the door. But he was here, standing near the bed. 

“We talked about this.” He said, sounding grave and disappointed. 

“But it’s been so long.” You argued. “I trust you.” 

He let out a loud exhale and said, “Then trust me when I say, it’s better this way.” 

You let out a sigh. “You can’t keep me in the dark forever, Bucky. Literally!” 

“Yes I can. I will.” He said arrogantly. That tone of his bothered you. “It’s better this way.” He repeated, but it sounded a lot like he was trying to convince himself instead of you. 

“Oh screw you!” You said with enough bitterness to make a grown man flinch. “If you won’t let me see you then stop coming into my bedroom. I don’t want to see you unless you agree to let go of this weird persona.” 

“Fine.” 

—

That night was the last time you heard from Bucky. 

He didn’t come home the following day. Nor the one after that. 

And no one knew where he went. 

You could tell something was wrong when you began noticing that the guards were talking in hushed voices whenever you were around. You noticed that the amount of security around the house doubled. That’s when you began to worry. 

By the third night, the entire house was filled with this almost tangible tension, worry, and fear. The house staff wouldn’t talk to you as much. The guards were always in and out of the house. The head of security advised you to not wander too far away from the house while you roam the grounds. 

You noticed the guards would follow you whenever you left the property. Be it when you left to visit your father at your old house or when you went out to buy supplies. 

Then you worried some more. But no one had answers to your questions. Nobody knew where he went. Whether he’s away for an assignment or if he’s simply choosing to be away from home. 

You tried your hardest to pretend that you didn’t care. You were still a little angry. After all, why couldn’t you see what he looked like? You’d spend so much time with him in the dark, running your hands all over him, tracing the outline of his facial features, he never had an issue with that. But why couldn’t you see him? 

You were angry, but also very much worried by the fourth day. You missed him, you realised. He had become such a habit, such a constant in your days. His sarcastic humour, his gentle hands, his comforting embrace, the way he left you notes in the morning, the way he took your art seriously. 

Fuck. You sat up in bed one night, patting ‘his’ side of the bed softly. You missed him. Badly. You felt a pinch inside your chest which you had never felt before. It hurt. You wanted him home. You admitted to yourself with a painful sigh. 

“Where are you?” You whispered, looking at the dark corner of your bedroom where he used to sit in silence like a ghost. “It’s okay if you want to stay in the dark forever.” You looked around the dark room which now without him seemed so much bigger and empty, “Just come home.” 

—

The next morning, as you half-heartedly approached the kitchen, you overheard something. And quickly realised you shouldn’t have heard it. It was the two ladies talking in hushed tones, the ones who usually served you your meals and often kept you company while you baked. 

“...cannot tell her, she’ll be heartbroken.” One of them said gravely. 

Sudden panic made your body freeze. You pressed your back against the nearest wall to keep yourself hidden while you processed those cryptic words. No, no, no. Is he hurt? Do they know something you don’t? 

The other replied, “But she deserves to know. Even if it’s not confirmed yet. I mean, do you see how she smiles when she reads his notes? Clearly she had grown to care for him. She needs to know.” 

The other argued, “I know, but I cannot imagine how hurt she will be when she hears about the rumours that her own father kidnapped her husband due to some past rivalry which was supposedly laid to rest after their wedding.” 

“They’ve been looking for him for days now. It’s been too long, he should’ve been found by now.” 

Fuck. Fuck. FUCK! 

No. This cannot be happening. 

You carefully walked away from the kitchen. Thinking, processing, analysing. 

If your father did it, it must’ve been for some shitty, arrogant reason. He probably just wanted to rub it in Bucky’s family’s face that he could still eliminate his biggest threat if he wanted to. To show that he could still get rid of them by holding their most precious weapon hostage. To toy with them by making them wait in anticipation. Your father had done it before. Not with Bucky, but other people. He usually never asked for ransom but he liked having his rivals beg him for mercy. 

Shit. He’s had Bucky for days now. 

You moved without thinking twice about it. For some reason, your brain knew exactly what to do even though your heart was still bothered by a multitude of emotions. It felt like you were on autopilot. 

You rushed into Bucky’s office and grabbed a handgun from his desk drawer, checked if it was loaded. It was. You knew Bucky kept it there for safety, he had told you that one time when you two were in bed together. 

You let out a frustrated sigh, then felt movement around your ankles. You looked down at your puppy and gave her a sad smile as you bent down to pet her. “I’m gonna go find daddy, okay? I’ll be home soon.” You left her with a kiss. 

You rushed back downstairs and found a group of armed guards in the foyer near the front door. You didn’t have the time to explain it all to them, especially since you were driven by a gut feeling. Instead you asked, “Do you guys have a way of tracking my phone, or my car?” 

One of them nodded. The rest frowned in confusion. 

You tried to keep your calm as much as you could even though your heart was racing. “Okay, I’m gonna go to my father’s house. Don’t follow me yet, but I need some of you to come find me as soon as I begin driving away from there.” 

Surprisingly, they just nodded and let you go. 

The whole time you drove to your father’s house, it felt you were constantly having to force yourself to keep calm. After four days of having no idea where he was, and now as all the puzzle pieces fit together, it was hard to remain calm. You just wanted to get to him. 

And while you drove, unanswered questions tormented you. 

Was he hurt? Where was he being kept? Was he beaten up? Was he even conscious? Would this end badly? How far would your father take this? Would he hurt him? 

Before you knew it, you were entering your father’s property. The guards let you in like they always did. You had to take a minute to breathe in your car before stepping out and going inside your old home. 

Luckily your father was home. 

You walked in and stopped in the middle of the foyer as you saw him making his way down the stairs. He slowed down when he noticed the glare you sent his way. And when he stopped in the middle of the grand staircase, with you still glaring at him, the guards who were scattered around the entrance noticed. You caught the way they silently got closer and closer, slowly reaching for their guns. 

Good thing you’d brought your own. 

The guards, as well as your father, froze in place the moment you pulled out Bucky’s gun and pointed it at the man responsible for all of this shit. No one made a single sound. No guard moved to even try to disarm you. 

You looked at your hand, which was surprisingly steady as it held the gun. And there, on the side of the shiny metal, you spotted Bucky’s initials. Your heart throbbed in a painful way, but you refused to be emotional right now, even though you needed a good cry after having bottled up your feelings for the last few days. 

You glared at your father, who was still shocked, and asked in a cold tone you’d never used before, “Where’s my husband?” 

Your father frowned. “What do you think you’re doing?” 

You repeated, “Where is he?” 

Your father scoffed, “You’ll shoot your own father? Is this how I raised you?” 

“And you’ll kidnap your own son-in-law? For what? To show that you’re still the shit?” You questioned in a slightly raised voice. 

He sighed like he was disappointed, “You don’t know what–,” 

You cut him off. “We had a deal, right? That these petty attacks would stop after the wedding? That’s why I got married, isn’t it? Because we’re supposed to keep family safe?” 

He was quiet for a moment. Then began talking again, “If I could just get them to–,” 

“Enough!” You sounded just as tired of his bullshit as you were. “Whatever plan you have, just stop!” Then it came spilling out of your mouth, “You were supposed to protect me. All of us,” You said, referring to your older siblings, “Instead you married each of us off in exchange for whatever or whoever was going to benefit you more.” 

He argued, “If this works, you can come back home. Don’t you want that?” 

“No,” You said, and realised you meant it. “This was never home.” You admitted. “He treats me better than my own family ever did. He doesn’t tell me that my art is a waste of time. He doesn’t keep me imprisoned inside his home. He doesn’t choose who I should mingle with and who I shouldn’t. He doesn’t force me to join family businesses because it’ll be good for his image.” You taunted your father. “And he’ll never sell me to the highest bidder.” 

Your father made a sound like he was disgusted. “Don’t tell me you’ve fallen in love with him?” 

You remained quiet. I care for him, you wanted to say, deeply. But that would be lying, wouldn’t it? Truth was… you did fall for him. His calm voice. His gentle but playful demeanour. His dark humour. His brilliant mind and sharp tongue, always ready to argue and debate. His gentle touch… you loved him. 

“What I do and who I care for is none of your concern anymore.” You concluded, stepping forward and keeping the gun aimed at his face. “Now, where is my husband?” 

The smirk on your father’s face was maddening. “You’ll never find him,” He said. “I’ve hidden him well.” He added.  

You gave him a smirk as well. One which mirrored his. 

“Oh don’t make me do this.” You cooed. “Did you forget all those times you got drunk and confessed all the bad things you did?” You began listing, “All those times you spilled all your little secrets. About our family businesses, about your allies, the lies and betrayal. The bodies that are buried on this very property. The skeletons in your closet.” You gave him a sick, sweet smile. “Imagine if all that information just magically ends up in the ears of your rivals, dad. Imagine the carnage.” 

His smirk disappeared. “You would betray me by siding with them?” He asked in disbelief. 

You were getting tired of this. So you lowered your gun and said, “I am one of them.” 

You walked out without a single glance back at your father, but you could tell he had his jaws clenched in anger. He hated being outsmarted. But his mistake was underestimating you. 

And as for Bucky’s location, well your father gave it away when he said ‘I’ve hidden him well.’ 

There was only one place he believed you knew nothing about since at the time that he told you about it, he was drunk out of his mind as he confessed more of his crimes: the rundown warehouse which he used as a hideout/storage for weapons and arms. 

Your father had always referred to Bucky being a ‘weapon’ so it was only fitting that he would think to hide him there. Thinking no one would find him. 

But you would. 

As you drove to the warehouse, you hoped that the guards were tracking you as you had instructed them to. Because if Bucky was truly there, there was a high chance that there would be some guards, and that Bucky must be injured. And you’d need help getting him out of there. 

Driving to the warehouse, you had silent tears streaming down your face. Not just out of sadness, but also frustration. Fuck, what had your life become? 

The warehouse was a disaster, you realised as you approached it. Large, crumbling, windows boarded up with rotting wood, broken machinery scattered around the outside. It looked like it had been abandoned for decades. And it was exactly the type of structure no one would bother to look twice at. The perfect place to hide illegal things, and son-in-laws you hate. 

There weren’t as many guards as you expected. Which would mean that Bucky was either chained and locked up like an animal, or that he was injured to the point where he was too weak to fight his way out of here. 

Or both. 

You shivered as you got out of your car. The few guards who were around noticed you and one of them began walking faster towards you the more you got closer to the entrance. 

“Miss, you can’t be here. Your father explicitly said no one is allowed–,” 

You scoffed and said, “Oh, I know what he said.” You kept walking. “What will you do? Shoot me?” 

“Miss,” He tried again, “I can’t let you–,” 

You turned towards him and placed the barrel of Bucky’s gun right under the guard’s chin. “You were saying?” 

Then you heard it. A fleet of cars approaching. The guards heard it too. You heard them yelling at one another while the one in front of you remained frozen in place. You smirked at him and said, “Now go play with them.” 

You had just enough time to duck and run inside before the gunshots began. You didn’t stop. The interior of the warehouse was just as dilapidated as the outside, and by the sound of it, there were quite some guards on the roof. Their heavy footsteps as they ran to duck and try to escape the bullets raining down on them echoed inside the empty warehouse. 

It was fairly easy to spot Bucky. But fuck was it painful to see him that way. 

He was chained to the wall, shackles around his wrists and ankles. His body slumped on the ground, his breaths ragged. You could tell he was tired. Perhaps tired of fighting against the chains. You couldn’t hold back your soft sob as you ran to him. 

They had left his muzzle-like mask on him, covering the lower half of his face. The leather jacket and gloves he wore were covered in blood and dirt. A lot of blood. You knelt down in front of him and that’s when you noticed the bullet wound on his thigh. It looked fresh. 

“Bucky?” You called, reaching a hand to touch his face. He was cold to the touch, but stirred at the sound of your voice. “Bucky, come on. Wake up. Please.” You sniffled and inched closer to him, “I’m here, I’m gonna get us out of here, okay?” 

He let out a weak cough. You could barely hear it over the sound of the gunshots outside. 

“Bucky,” You tried to get the chains and shackles off of him, “Come on, wake up. We need to go home.” Your own voice cracked as you felt the silent tears streaming down your face as you were unable to get the shackles off. “Please,” You begged. 

Then as the gunshots outside faded away, you heard Bucky’s faint voice saying, “Use the gun.” 

You turned to face him. “What?” 

He spoke again, his voice raspier than usual and sounding muffled due to the mask. “Shoot at the chains.” 

Your hands trembled just a little as you reached for the gun you had brought. His gun. And you said, “Okay, don’t move.” 

You did. And only missed twice. 

Breaking the chains left the shackles still around his wrists and ankles but that could be dealt with later. You were panicking, wondering how you’d get him out of here but the guards barged in just in time. And you let out a sigh of relief when they ran straight to Bucky and carefully picked him up. 

As a couple of them managed to get Bucky in the backseat of your car, one of them let you know that there was a doctor and his assistants already waiting at home to tend to Bucky. Another one asked you what to do regarding the warehouse. 

“Burn it.” You told him. “I’ll deal with my father later, right now we need to get Bucky home.” 

On the drive home, Bucky kept trying to talk. But he was so weak he could barely get full sentences out. 

“Weren’t you mad at me?” He asked.

You sniffled and said refused to answer that. Instead you said, “Try not to talk. You’ve been shot, we don’t know how much blood you’ve lost,” You rambled. “Let’s get you to the doctor, okay?”  

“S’okay,” He mumbled, “It went through.” 

That only hurt more. “Bucky please, you need to save energy, okay? We’re almost home.” 

“They… shot me with my own gun.” He refused to keep quiet. 

At first you thought his brain was being delirious and making him ramble. Because of the pain, exhaustion, thirst, hunger. But then a weak sound left his mouth. Still muffled by the mask because no one removed it, and it sounded a lot like a very weak, faint laugh. 

“Eros got pierced by his own arrow after all.” He mumbled. 

You held back a sob. Then muttered, “I hate you so much, Bucky Barnes.” 

Another weak laugh. “No, you don’t, wife.” 

Then he passed out cold. 

— 

The next few days which followed Bucky’s rescue went by so fast and so painfully. The medical team kept close watch on him for days. Bucky was in and out of consciousness a lot. All the meds and the exhaustion kept him constantly out cold. 

The nurses and the house staff were constantly around him. But for some reason, you couldn’t bring yourself to go into his room. Not yet. You’d linger near the door and the doctors and the staff would constantly update you about his condition, but you never went in. 

Mainly it was because of shame. At what your father had done to him. But also you were still making peace with and processing your own emotions and you couldn’t face him until you were fully ready. What was important was that he was rescued and safe in his home. 

About a week later, the medical team finally left. And promised they would do frequent check ups and told you that Bucky needed a lot of rest. 

And that night, you managed to find the courage to finally step inside Bucky’s bedroom. It was a lot like yours, just larger. The room was dark when you walked in. But the open curtains allowed some light in from the outside. 

Okay. You spoke to yourself as you approached Bucky’s bed. It’s high time you find out who you married. 

Your hands shook a little as you reached for the dim lamp on his bedside table. But you turned it on quickly before you could talk yourself out of it. 

The golden light illuminated the room partly, and there he was. A little bruised, with a cut on his lip. His handsome face made you smile and tear up at the same time. You couldn’t hold back from reaching to touch his face softly, carefully. You ran your knuckles along his cheek and whispered, “There you are, ghost.” 

He stirred. And soon, a pair of sparkling blue eyes look up at you. For a moment you panicked, wondering if he would be upset. But instead he said, “This is cheating.” 

You let out a soft laugh and asked, “How are you feeling? You’ve been asleep for days.” 

“I feel like beating your father up.” He mumbled. 

“Oh, same.” You agreed. Then added, “I’m so sorry for what he did to you.” 

Over the past few days, the guards had gathered what had truly happened the day Bucky went missing. Turns out, he did leave for an assignment but your father and his men had been keeping a close eye on him for days, and since the wedding was supposed to have ended all rivalry, Bucky had his guard down as he entered your father’s territory. And your father had the upper hand for once and took advantage of it. Bucky was cornered, outnumbered and taken. He was kept in that warehouse up until you found him. 

“Don’t be,” Bucky whispered, reaching for your hand on your lap. He gave your hand a soft squeeze and said, “You saved me.” 

You couldn’t look away from Bucky. It felt so intimate to finally be able to see his face. Then rather sheepishly, you asked, “Can I sleep here? I’ll be careful.” He was still injured and in pain, but you just wanted to be close to him. You needed to. 

He smirked, “Come on.” You walked to the other side of the bed and slid under the covers, keeping some distance between you and him. He turned to look at you and said, “Want me to leave the light on?” 

You nodded. And he did. 

— 

A lot changed after that. 

Bucky was healing from his injury and was starting to walk again. Which meant that he was home a lot. He did ‘work’ but it mainly consisted of him ordering people around on the phone. 

Him being at home meant that he followed you around as much as he physically could. He would spend time in your studio, sometimes he’d stay for hours and watch you finish your pieces. He also spent a lot more time with your dog, taking her on short walks and teaching her new tricks. 

He’d stay with you in the kitchen while you baked. He’d go with you whenever you went shopping for supplies. Bucky became your shadow. And consequently, spending this much together made you feel closer than ever to him. 

He became your best friend. 

He also became a lot more… bold. 

—

One night Bucky found you in his bathroom. After that night when you first slept in his bed, you hadn’t gone back to your bedroom. So now, most of your things slowly found their way into his space. Like your night time skin care products. 

Bucky crept up behind you and wrapped his arms around you. 

You met his eyes through the mirror and gave him a smile. “Your limp is nearly gone.” You announced, noticing the way he walked was so much better now. 

He gave you a look which meant nothing but mischief, “And you know what that means?” 

You could already tell where this was going. You immediately turned him down. “Bucky, we cannot. You’re still injured.” 

“But it’s been weeks.” He said it like it was the ultimate torture. “Don’t you miss those nights we spent together? Hmm?” He whispered, leaning in to kiss your neck. He knew it was one of your weaknesses. “Remember how good it feels when I make you come?” 

You sighed, letting him kiss you and hold you for a moment. “Buck… you’re still healing.” 

“Come on, baby,” He cooed, nuzzling your neck, “I’ll make it so good. I promise I’ll tell you if it hurts.” 

You almost gave in the moment he playfully bit your neck, his hands finding the belt of your robe and shamelessly undoing it before sliding in to touch your warm skin. “But,” You tried to find something even though all you wanted was to drag him to bed, “Your stitches…” Your words ended in a soft moan as his metal fingers found their way in between your legs, circling around your clit. 

Bucky growled. Growled. Then said, “Fine, you get to be on top then.” 

You froze, and let out a nervous chuckle. “But I…,” You opened your eyes and met his through the mirror. “I–,” 

“Shh, it’s okay.” He reassured you, remembering the time you told him you’d never done anything with anyone before. “I know.” He gave you a sweet kiss on the cheek. “I’ll teach you.” 

And he did. Patiently. 

He took his time in undressing both of you and held your hand in his as he laid down and pulled you on top of him. 

“I’m scared I’ll hurt you.” You murmured. 

He gave you a reassuring smile. “You won’t, baby. Now come on.” 

He watched as you carefully straddled him, settling comfortably around his waist. One hand holding his metal one tightly while the other remained splayed over his chest. 

Bucky looked up at you with nothing but adoration and lust as he tugged on your hand, pulling you in for a kiss. You leaned down gently and pressed your mouth to his. His warm hand immediately rubbed up and down your side lovingly. He pulled away just a little and whispered against your mouth, “We��ll do whatever you’re comfortable with, okay?” 

You nodded, already breathless. 

“Tell me, baby. What do you want?” 

You told him the one thing you desperately wanted. “I want to touch you.” 

Bucky smirked and supported his upper body up on his elbows, with you still straddling his waist, your core pressing down on his crotch. “Go on then, touch me.” He murmured. 

He watched you intently as you reached out and touched his face first. Bucky’s heart was racing, you could tell by the way he breathed, as your finger slowly trailed down his face, along his neck and down till his abs, so slowly that you could feel his muscles tensing underneath your touch. 

You gave him a teasing smile when you noticed the effect you have on him, and how he couldn’t help but stare at your naked body. 

“Don’t tease me,” He mumbled. 

You chuckled and leaned in to give him a brief kiss before hesitantly wrapping your hand around his cock. Part of the reason why you kissed him while doing it was because you were worried about your lack of experience, so you did it to distract him. 

But he caught it. And wrapped his own hand around yours, making you grip him tighter. You pulled away from the kiss and looked into his pretty eyes. Bucky was breathing heavily. You let his hand guide you as you gave him an experimental stroke, a gentle up and down movement. 

He felt thick and hard, and big. You looked down for a quick minute as you let him continue guiding your hand, lazily stroking his cock, up and down. Your thumb rubbed his tip slowly, making him groan as you looked back up at him and kissed your way down his neck, around the base of his throat, making him gasp in pleasure. 

“See?” He whispered, “You’re learning already.” He said as he slowly let go of your hand and let you touch him on your own. 

You continued exploring this new feeling. He was completely fine with just being there and letting you take your time. And you did take your time, touching him everywhere you could, stroking him as slowly or as quickly as you wanted to. Until he was so close to the edge, eyes rolled to the back of his head, lips parted and occasional moans escaping his open mouth as  pre cum started dripping down his cock. 

Oh he was a sight to behold. But you were getting impatient, and you wanted him in you as soon as possible. So you stopped, earning a groan from him. 

“I want you,” You said. 

Bucky looked like he was barely able to hold back either. “Come on,” He held your hand again, pulled you in for a quick kiss as you straddled him properly. His hand reached down and aligned the tip of his cock to your hole, teasing you with it by sliding it up and down your slit a few times until you were whimpering. “Now sit on it baby come on,” He encouraged you as you began sinking down on him, gasping as his cock stretched you out. “You can do it.” He murmured, breathless as he watched his cock disappear inside you more and more. “That's it. All the way down, come on baby.” 

You were a moaning mess by the time you sunk all the way down, impaling yourself down on his cock. Fuck. You had never felt so full before. So fucking full. 

“You okay, baby?” He asked, holding you by your hips, moving you back and forth just a little bit to create some friction. 

You nodded, moaning at the slight movement. 

“Want me to help you move?” He asked, lips parted and he had that wild look in his eyes.

Fuck, he was beautiful. 

“Yes, please,” You whined, placing your hands on his chest to brace yourself for what was coming. 

He wasted no time. Bucky grabbed you by the hips and helped you move up and down his cock. Your wet warmth wrapped all around him, making him swear under his breath and groan at how good you felt. 

You couldn’t look away from his ocean blue eyes while you rocked your hips against his. You moved against him perfectly, your walls gripping him tightly and feeling him twitch inside you. 

“Look at you.” He cooed. “Look how well you're taking it.” 

You couldn’t help but lean in to kiss his open mouth. He was so perfect. He was everything you had ever dreamt of, you realised. 

His metal fingers moved to touch your clit while you rode his cock, teasing you and bringing you closer to that edge. It wouldn’t take much. You were so overwhelmed already. 

“Bucky…” You whined, dragging your hands down and pressing both your palms against his toned abdomen, carefully avoiding touching him around his thigh area, where he was shot. 

Bucky watched you, your breasts bouncing gently, lips parted, softly gasping as you got so, so close to the edge. 

And he knew. So he quickened his pace, still moving you up and down his cock while he rubbed your throbbing clit. 

“Baby, I’m gonna need you to come for me, okay?” His voice was low, barely even a whisper. His desperation was quite clear. He began to thrust his hips up even harder, matching your movements.

The air around you got hotter, and that look in his eyes made you want to live in this moment forever. Bucky was the most beautiful mess you’d ever seen. A sweaty, moaning mess under you, messy hair, swollen lips, and a throbbing cock. 

You were sure you looked like a mess too as you felt your walls clench around him, gripping him and milking him perfectly. 

“Come for me,” He whispered, “Come on, baby.” 

You came without a warning, crying out loud and impaling yourself down on him one last time as you did. Bucky thrust up into you one last time and came undone as well, both of you breathing hard and fast. 

You carefully got up from his lap and laid down beside him, body limp and slightly sore in between your legs. 

You were still catching your breath as you asked, “Did I hurt you?” You sounded just as worried as you were. 

Bucky chuckled. “I should be the one asking you that.” 

You smiled and snuggled into his side, he wrapped an arm around you and pulled you closer. 

“I’m fine, baby.” He said and kissed your forehead. 

You both laid there in silence for a while. 

Cuddling and relishing each other’s warmth, caressing each other’s skin. 

You felt his fingers drawing random shapes on your back as you laid your head on his chest, feeling his steady heartbeats against your cheek. You felt the need to ask him, “Why were you so against showing yourself to me?” 

He gave you a soft chuckle. “You just can’t let that go, huh?” 

“Nope.” 

He sighed, pulling you closer. “I was… afraid.” 

You frowned. “Afraid of what?” You pulled away and looked up at him. “Why did you hide this pretty face from me?” You gave him a quick kiss on his chest as you waited for his answer. 

He sighed again. “Everywhere I go, I… whenever people see me up close, it’s already too late. They don’t see a human anymore, they see death staring back at them.” He paused. You remained quiet. He continued. “I see it, you know? In their eyes. When they look at me and plead, or beg, or curse me.” A humourless laugh, then, “After some years of that, I began seeing it in the mirror as well. I saw the same thing they see. After years of brutality, and killing, and spilling blood,” A soft chuckle, “Years of being an evil Eros as you call it, I grew to hate my face.” 

You felt tears forming at your waterline but you couldn’t look away from him. Not when he was being so brave and vulnerable. 

He continued. “And then before our wedding, I looked you up.” He confessed, a little embarrassed. “And you were so beautiful.” He looked you right in the eyes and repeated, “You are so beautiful. I guess, I didn’t want you to look at me and see death, and ugly and all the other dark stuff. I didn’t want to see that look in your eyes, the same one I see in everyone. That look of fear and disgust.” He finally admitted, “So I thought, I’d just hide and be a ghost.” 

“My ghost.” You corrected him, reaching out to cup his chin in your palm. “And I’m gonna need you to never stop haunting me.” You said, leaning in to leave a soft kiss on his lips. “I want you to always be in the shadows. Be with me, even in the dark.” You gave him a smile. “I look at you now and you know what I see? I see a man who treated me with respect. A man who wouldn’t touch me unless I asked for it. A man who gave me so much space for my creativity.” A faint smile, then you added, “You made me fall in love with art all over again, and now everything I paint, I paint with you in my mind.” 

He gave you a smile which both broke and mended your heart. 

“Oh Buck,” You cupped his gorgeous face with both hands and said, “You’re not death, or scary, or any other dark shit. You’re mine, and I love you.” 

He pulled you in for a kiss so quickly you barely processed it. “And I love you.” 

You giggled into the kiss and only pulled away when you were breathless. You kissed your way down his chin and nuzzled his neck, sighing in delight. 

Bucky said, “I think I should retire.” 

“Hmm,” You asked, “And what would you do in retirement?” 

“Watch you paint, raise our dog, adopt some more animals, attend your art exhibitions, and eventually make some babies with you.” He listed it all so easily. 

“Sounds like a plan.” You agreed.