#some thomas shit this time babey
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Part 5 Daddy’s Little Girl
Logan x reader
Warnings: Age gap (early twenties reader), swearing, first times, virgin reader, plus size reader, tension, oral f receiving, smut, daddy kink, dom! logan, Abuse (Not from Logan), anxiety, depression, mention of self-harm scars, reader has muscle issues and body pain, angst
@mmeerraa @the141bandicoot @clairealeehelsing @dirtydianaahah @babey-fruit-bat @roseydoesypoesy @landlockedmermaid77 @nonamevenus
Previous part <-
After shopping you head back to his house. You feel like curling up and sleeping or crying, you haven't decided. Logan’s giving you soft smiles and comforting looks and you just want to slap him. You don’t know why, maybe to knock him out of whatever spell he’s under so he realises the situation. You don’t say much apart from a thank you and a going to go to your room before he can speak. You close the door softly sagging against it before you put the two bags down, Logan ended up paying for everything much to your protest. He gave you one raised eyebrow and you should’ve just kneeled at his feet. You huff gripping your hair briefly before sighing. You need to wash the clothes first before you wear them. You in pack and take the tags off before sneaking out hearing Logan on the phone. You tip toe to where you’ve seen his washing machine and frown at it once you’re there.
“Can’t be too hard” you mumble laying your clothes down and looking at the buttons.
You give up, whatever rubic’s cube bull shit this is and go to find Logan. He’s standing in the dining area phone still his ear as he speaks softly. He hangs up with a small sigh before sensing you and turning around.
“What’s up?” He asks.
“Um, can I borrow your washing machine? I don’t know how to use it though” you fiddle your jumper sleeve briefly before he smirks lightly but nods heading to the small room.
“Washing liquid goes in there, turn the dial here, press these two buttons and then the start” he explains and you relay it in your head and nod as the machine starts.
“Thank you” you say and he nods cursing softly when his phone rings.
“Scuse me, princess” he mutters and you nod heading to your room instead. You hear him talk angrily and tense up. You close your door and sigh a little shakily before unpacking the other things you bought. All toiletry items plus some extra things, pain meds, funny looking heating patches, a soft blanket too. You had been embarrassed when you wandered to the bedding area and began running your hands over the blankets with a 6’2 muscular man behind you, watching you. You explained in a mumble how you couldn’t sleep without one and liked the comfort of them. He didn’t judge though saying you didn’t need to explain yourself and that you were shopping for you to be comfortable. A small knock comes and you answer seeing Logan open the door and lean against the frame.
“Alright?” He asks and you nod.
“Everything alright with you?” You ask and he sighs.
“Thomas is kicking up a stink, mans always been bitchy” you can’t help the snort that leaves you at his words, it’s true though Thomas always had something to complain about.
“Sorry” you say laughing softly, seeing him smile too.
“Don’t be” he chuckles and pushes off the door before sitting by you. Your heart picks up as he takes your hand, the one you punched your father with. It’s bruised now not as bad as you thought it would be though. He brings it to his lips and presses a kiss to your knuckles softly making you flush as he sighs a bit.
“What’s wrong?” You ask and he offers you a smile obviously hiding away whatever thoughts he had.
“Don’t worry about me Bub, you want some lunch?” He asks and you hesitate but nod. He gets up and leaves and you sigh quietly.
You had gone food shopping as well, Logan buying a trolly full of things, asking what you liked and didn’t like. It felt strange and to surreal, like you were going to wake up in your bed now, your father yelling at you for sleeping in. Logan makes sandwiches and you thank him before eating quietly at the table. Your minds in a whirlwind of thoughts. You can’t stay here forever, obviously that kiss he gave you didn’t mean much, he just being overly generous, kind. He’d never want someone like you. You barely finish your sandwich before excusing yourself to go back to your room. You grab a pen and paper, searching up jobs, different hotels, places you could stay it’d be almost impossible to get a job though even if the town was small. You’d need a record of your past two years of work which you didn’t have, bank statements. You spiral into things you need and crash. You lie sideways staring at the wall a few pieces of paper spread on the floor. You read your dad’s messages, hurtful, guilt tripping, fake apologies. You delete them all and his number feeling a little better. Logan had given you access to his wifi so you had free internet for now to research how to live on your own. You googled therapists, the doctors in town too, you needed a referral from the doctor to get into a therapist though. Another knock comes, but you don’t answer it but the door still opens.
“Sorry bub, checking to see if you were asleep or not” Logan says and you feel too exhausted to speak so you shrug. You expect him to leave but the bed dips with his weight and you frown lying your phone down and glancing to him.
“I think this bed is more comfortable than mine” he sighs and you smile slightly but stay facing your back to him.
“What’s with all the papers?” He asks casually and you tense.
“Doodling” you lie and he hums.
“You alright?” He asks after some silence and you sigh. No you’re not alright, you don’t want to explain it to him though.
“You can talk to me if you want to Bub” he says and you clench your jaw. You sit in silence before he sighs softly, gives your shoulder a squeeze before he leaves.
You skip dinner, pretending to be asleep when Logan comes back to check on you. He closes the curtains, covers you with a blanket and flicks your light off before closing your door softly. You wait till he’s asleep before going to your clothes out drying. You grab the ones you had with you that day and put them on again, you fold the blanket up nicely and make sure everything is tidy and neat. You move ordered a taxi to meet you down the road a bit, you have no idea where you’ll go, but it can’t be here. You don’t bother with a note and somehow you’ll pay him back for what he bought. You put what you had in a plastic bag and sneak down the hall. This place isn’t really big enough to sneak around and when you get to the sliding door you see his shadow reflected in it. You stop breathing hoping it’s a figment of your imagination.
“You’re not exactly quiet, princess” he says and you glare at his reflection, great now he’s mocking you.
“I’m leaving” you turn to say like a grown woman.
“A taxi is waiting for me down the road” you add.
“Where will you go?” He asks walking slowly to the end of the hall, flicking the light on making you squint.
“There’s a cheap motel in town I’ll stay at for a few nights” you say.
“Then what?” He asks walking forward some more.
“I’ll find a job somewhere, seek out some job help” you answer.
“Then what?” He repeats and you frown.
“Then I’ll eventually find somewhere to live maybe, or I’ll rent a room with someone” you shrug as he doesn’t speak, just crosses his arms across his naked chest and stares you down so you scoff.
“Stop with this silent scolding attitude I’m not a child, I’m a grown woman, you don’t want me here Logan” you say harshly feeling your own heart break with the words.
“How do you know what I want?” He raises an eyebrow at you.
“I haven’t taken anything you bought it’s all neatly there with the receipt, I’ll be out of your hair soon” you sigh as he comes closer.
“You didn’t answer my question” he says voice quieter but deeper as he stares you down.
“You saved me out of pity or the kindness of your heart, and I thank you I’ll never forget it and I don’t know how to repay you, but I’ve over stayed my welcome and your resources” you say hating the way your heart beats rapidly and how small you feel. Your phone vibrates with a notification your taxi is here.
“Thank you Logan, and goodbye” you turn so he can’t see your tears going to open the door till a large hand splays atop your head against the screen and stops.
“Logan” you sigh hanging your head. He snatches your phone from your hand and you frown turning.
“Logan!” You yell as he holds it to his ear.
“Hey, sorry Bub, I’m going to have to cancel the ride” he says as you stare with your mouth open.
“Yeah no, it’s a stage name funny enough, yeah I know” he laughs as you glare him down.
“Sorry buddy, have a goodnight” he hangs up eyes meeting your glare as you scoff.
“What the hell?” You say.
“You’re not going anywhere, not till you’re on your feet” he says finale.
“Logan!” You snap at him and he meets your challenge.
“I didn’t do it out of kindness or pity, I did it because I wanted you” his eyes go dark as he stares at you.
“Because I was a selfish prick” he adds clenching his jaw.
“Because I see the way you look at me like I’m a beacon and I relish it” his voice drops and you struggle to breathe.
“I want to take care of you like nobody ever has, I want you here forever in my life, I want your smile in the morning, I want your bad days and good, I want to touch you in so many ways, I want your thighs around my head, I want to treat you like a princess” his words leave you speechless and short of breath as he stared at you with intensity his chest rising and falling quickly. You falter feeling your panties wet and warm, your body reacting on its own accord as you open and close your mouth briefly.
“Oh” is all you manage though.
Next part ->
#x reader#Logan x reader#logan howlett x reader#logan howlett#hugh Jackman#Wolverine#Wolverine x reader
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Have I talked about Skyrim au? Probably. I know I've at least mentioned it. Anywho. I'd say I'll be brief but I'm laughing at myself. Me? Brief? No way
Remus — Remus is a part of the Dark Brotherhood. They are ! assassins ! He specializes in contracts that are meant to send a message to the general public and he's kind of weird. A bit like Cicero but even Cicero says there's something off about him. He fits in extremely well though and it satiates his blood lust enough for him to actually chill the hell out the rest of the time.
Roman — Roman is a part of the Companions! They are a warriors guild and he has proven himself to be one of the best among them. A true shield-brother! He's also a werewolf in the inner circle (a fact of which Remus is extremely jealous) and he always plays the hero for whatever they have to do.. which is good because its the schtick. Clearing bounties, picking bandits off the roads, whatever. He's up for it.
Logan — Logan is a professor at the College Of Winterhold! I'm going to pretend there is more storyline to the College and actual classes because I love mage Logan and he deserves love!! He actually kind of hates that it's freezing there but he wants to learn more magic so he does. I love him and he is babey. I'm on a Logan kick rn.
Patton — Patton attends the Bards College in Solitude. He learns to play instruments and he travels. Why? Honestly, I just really like the idea of someone thinking he's a stupid bard but he has gossip from across Skyrim and will break his lute on someone's head if he needs to. I don't want to push Innocent Useless Patton; he's a deadly bitch. And bards aren't usually deadly in Skyrim so I'm changing things for him <3
Virgil — Virgil is a vampire in Clan Volkihar but he's often on the roads instead. He's not a big fan of the leader of the clan (Harkon when I catch you Harkon) and was actually friends with his daughter Serana before she went missing (to his knowledge). He was originally a member of the Dawnguard (vampire hunters) but he contracted vampirism and couldn't cure it in time. He treats it as a "you ever have one of those days where this might as well happen?" thing.
Janus — Janus is a thief in the Thieves Guild in Riften. I have been waiting for this. He is one of the best thieves they've got and he's cocky about it. He's basically Vex, except that he's actually better at pickpocketing and sneaking into places. He's also a fence, which means anything stolen that he's given he'll turn around and sell for a profit. He's immensely cocky but it's for a good reason.
Thomas — Dragonborn. Just some dude who turned out to be Dragonborn and is now travelling and oh god, why does he have to meet such interesting people?
Anyway they all know each other. Virgil and Janus are exes, Patton and Logan grew up together, the twins see each other like once in a blue moon but Remus occasionally tries to kill Roman for the fun of it (it's practice!), and I love them all dearly. I'm actually replaying Skyrim so !! Yippee !! I have something to base all this on :D
— 👑
Fucking D E V O U R I N G this I L O V E L O V E L O V E it S O fucking much!!! Assassin!Ree, Werewolf!Ro, Mage!Lo, B A D A S S Bard!Patt, Vamp!Vee, Thief!Jan, A N D Character!Thomas in AUs rep??? Sign me the F U C K up holy shit I N E E D it!!!
#also hell yeah pro gaymer that skyrim >:}3#past anxceit mentioned#remus sanders#roman sanders#logan sanders#patton sanders#virgil sanders#janus sanders#character!thomas#ts remus#ts roman#ts logan#ts patton#ts virgil#ts janus#sanders sides#thomas sanders#asks#answers#👑 anon#not a countdown
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6 questions
tagged by @dirty-bosmer <3
RULES: answer the questions then tag some peeps (🐥) you want to get to know better/catch up with.
Last Song: The Silicone Veil - Susanne Sundfør. i was thinking of this quote from her wikipedia page: "Dagbladet wrote that Sundfør was so good that other young Norwegian artists would start crying when hearing her [...] because she is several leagues above them[.]" absolute king shit.
Last Show : lmao. doc mcstuffins? i babysat a 3-year-old today. we also sat on my porch and blew bubbles because it was raining :)
Currently Watching: me and my bf just finished that show about Elizabeth Holmes called the dropout. we've also been keeping up with the last of us
Currently Reading: Gravity's Rainbow by Thomas Pynchon and The Jakarta Method by Vincent Bevins.
Current Obsession: winter is letting up which means it's time for workin outside babey. this week I moved my elderberry and fig trees in preparation for making fruit tree guilds. i also mulched and put a border around my goth garden where all the birds hang out. when the rain stops i have some masonry work to do, and compost to turn and spread. i fuckin love spring
Unrelated Obsession: i dunno if this reaches the level of "obsession" but i tried my hand at leatherworking this week and might fixate on that for a while
tagging: @nuwanders @druidx @blossom-adventures @thelonghanddaydream and anyone else who likes doing these. no pressure as always
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So uh,,,,,,,some more important notes on Thomas for this AU
He's an excellent swimmer-big duh, I know, but I thought I'd mention it. He's also able to hold his breath Super Duper Long and that makes his singing better sometimes too. (On the whole, since mermaids can breath underwater (AND above water air!) they breathe Super Well, but to do some of their Powery Shit, sometimes they need a bit more breath than a human would even be *capable* of, so they can sing for super duper long and it's basically Super unlikely for a mermaid to have breathing problems unless their species is predisposed to it. And of course, all of this extends to Sirens, bc Of Course babey.) I'm debating on maybe having him be able to hold it long enough to visit the sides' grotto or smth? Like idk if I wanna keep him a Mostly Normal Human or curve him a *liiittle* more towards Weirdness. Idk, maybe
He gets certain concentrated spots of dryness on his skin, specifically his legs and shit. They're basically old scale genes trying to find their way back in and Failing yknow? His whole family deals with it and they just called it dry skin for the most part. His hair is also Super Thick. This is also A Thing.
His family *knows* they're descendant to a siren-it's about 5 or so generations up I guess. Whoever Fucked The Fish got the tail-end of basic sirens...basically. So not SUPER distant but distant enough that it's like. 8% of their DNA at this rate yknow. And they don't exactly keep it...a *secret?* Like it's not like some Shameful Family Secret or some shit, some of them have actually *talked* to mermaids or sirens at some point in their lives, but they don't just...*tell it* to new members, yknow? They...let them find out themselves, if they ever do-just like Thomas did-and *then* lift the veil.
So basically Thomas went to his parents like 'ok so I KNOW you guys are gonna think I'm INSANE but um,,,,,,,I met some mermaids-'
'Oh yeah mermaids! Yeah we know those exist'
',,,,,,w. Well. They told me I was probably a descendant of a siren-'
'Ah yeah, your great-great-great grandma was a siren. Tail end of the basic ones, they just started having males show up. We have some old documents and stuff, you wanna see?'
',,,,,,,,,,,su re???'
Wild interaction for Thomas, at the very least
Starting the *day* he was able to talk, that boy has been *singing.* Most of his family have excellent voices, but due to his power, people were drawn to it even *more.* And even though most of them had their own little powers, some of them didn't even like singing, and so they maybe never even learned they had anything close to a power in the first place. Thomas though...he *loved* it.
He definitely had some conflict at first like 'wait are any of my friendships real? Have I just kept them here with my singing????? hhhHHHHHH,,,'
Thomas will sometimes bring his phone to the edge of the beach and play some music and sing along. Eventually, if any of the sides get close enough, they feel his signature Pull (when anyone's close enough to Thomas' voice, they can feel the Pull of his power kinda; esp mermaids, as they're *used* to sensing pulls like that.) and call the others. They all gather around the beach and listen to human music, which Thomas will sometimes translate to Mer Speak. Sometimes they'll just listen to it. Often, they'll sing songs that they already all know together, either in mer or human. (Specifically English, but they don't understand Any of it At All, so.) Sometimes Thomas will come out to the beach and just start singing, and the sides will eventually come out to sing with him, if they have the time. They'll just adlib together, all of them somehow knowing the song they're singing, Patton broadcasting happiness and soft feelings and making sure everyone seems ok, maybe the twins doing a little dance or even Janus joining in, dancing in their own little mermaid way. Virgil makes sure they're left alone (in every situation) and Logan softly sings where he usually hums; it's rare to hear him sing so softly, if he does. They all treasure it. The twins, even, soften up, singing softer and leaving their vibrato at the door.
Ever since he was Tiney, he's loved the ocean. It's always called to him, and he's always stayed close to beaches and lakes and the like. The more ocean he's close to, the calmer he is babey. He went for ocean biology in college (he probably actually works in the field) and I've *just* decided that after the sides told them their powers and shit he asked abt their species and after they told him he BARRAGED them w questions about their behavior
He promised *immediately* not to record them or ever *expose* them or whatever wild shit a random evil scientist in a movie with a crazy rare wild animal would do. Learning about them, though, was *amazing,* and he never even wrote anything down.
One day, Thomas' parents insisted on meeting his Mermaid Friends and he was like 'sure ok'. So he brought them to the beach and introduced them. Janus was like '!!!! Oh shit I've seen them before!' and so were the twins.
Janus recognized them from his Loner Days, when he used to lie to humans to make them do stupid shit. They just said hi though-in a language he understood. Just two nice humans he ran across on a pier.
The twins don't *really* remember them, just barely, but the couple ran into them when they were around 11, a little after they were abandoned, with a young Thomas. They talked just a small bit, and Thomas doesn't really remember them; it seemed a little insignificant, since they just seemed like swimmers. He said hi to them, not realizing he was speaking oddly, and they were on their way. The couple didn't get a chance to talk to the seemingly *very young* couple of mermaids again, but they never really forgot about them.
The parents are like '!!!!' at all three of them like 'oh yeah you!!!' Janus is like 'oh Thomas, you didn't tell me your parents were that couple I met who knew our tongue that one time.'
The two ask the twins about why they were on their own. They've worked through a lot of that shit, but it still stings a bit.
Remus took his old place behind Roman, like he used to, and they both looked down, Roman rubbing his hand against his neck and laughing nervously. "Uh...we were. Abandoned. At about 10 years old."
"We were all we had," Remus muttered from behind him. Patton moved over and rested a hand on both of their shoulders with a sad frown.
Thomas' mother gave a similarly sad frown and gave a small pet to both boys' heads before brushing their hair back. "I'm...terribly sorry. It's never right for a parent to abandon their kin."
Roman and Remus simply stare and blush a bit, moving away and taking a place at the back of the group where they can simply sit and think,
'*we haven't felt a motherly touch like that in so, so long.*'
Thomas' father spread plenty of dad jokes that Patton had fun with and they talked (and maybe sang) some more before leaving.
They kept visiting after that, usually with Thomas and rarely without.
Needless to say that they basically became the local adoptive parents, *especially* to the twins.
At least Janus finally gets some help in keeping these dumbasses healthy and in line.
#anyways just some more stuff for the au!! yeye#some thomas shit this time babey#idk what ill use for his parents names. probably just random ones ig idk#anyways ye!! weve got more Ideas(tm)#and thats that for today#sanders sides#trash talks#mersiren sides au#creativitwins#v slight but still;;Publicity man#character thomas#ts roman#ts remus#ts janus#ts patton#ts deceit#extra for jan Just In Case#theyre the only ones mentioned by name#the others are just mentioned Casually yknow#and then#thomathy#my tag for character thomas just cause
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in regards to the god!reader having a lover from their world, how would the archons or whoever you want react to god!reader somehow bringing them into tevyat? (not the same anon btw)
If this were to happen i feel like it'd be a bit like this ofc it'd be different im just a tad bit obsessed with this atm
I brainrotted so hard with this thank you
The archons would be mega jealous but you love your lover so much. You're so happy when they smile, hold your hand, kiss you, no matter how jealous they may be they can't get upset.
You were so sad without them too, that when they finally came to Teyvat the entire world felt how happy you were.
Not to mention that they know you best, been there before you were deemed a god.
When they're first brought to Teyvat they're very confused about your new deity status and are threatened 24/7 by the characters to treat you with respect
To which you scold them because your lover doesn't have to do that.
Eventually they get the hang of it but I feel like the teasing potential they have over you is too great
They'd probably tease you about all the characters you're down bad for.
They'd be like, "Hey remember when you spent your money to get Thoma? A four star?"
"When you saw Yae Miko and went 'Excuse me, mommy? sorry mommy? sorry, mommy-?"
"SHUT UP SHE'S RIGHT THERE!"
You have to be careful though because your acolytes can and will take threats to your spouse literally.
"I'll push you off Amakumo peak if you don't shut the fuck up about my gambling addiction-"
Meanwhile your cult is already planning their murder but they have no clue how to get to Amakumo peak.
if you catch onto their plans for murder you have to tell them that your insults and threats are loving. It's how you showed your love for people back on your world because they didn't treat you like a god.
Some of them are confused, unable to imagine you as anything other than a god, but others understand.
Eventually you have to make it excruciatingly clear to all of your acolytes that your lover is untouchable. Not to be hurt no matter the circumstances or what you say. You make a rule book just so the number one rule can be to not hurt your lover no. matter. what.
You lover saying so much obscure shit. They make it their mission to make you laugh at the stupidest inside jokes and memes that none of the cult members understand.
You: *Being serious*
Your lover: It was never about the wandering traveler...
You: Shut the fuck up-
Your lover: "It was about THE METS BABEY-"
Singing tar-tar-taglia lover of Snezhnayan queen together and Childe isn't sure if he should be touched or not.
Cute dates in all of your favorite places. All those places you'd take pictures together you can now stare at for hours together.
Y'know how most of the time we shorten names to make it easier to type? Like Barbara = Barbs?
Doing that and saying all of their names wrong
Calling Kokomi negative crit rate and she's not too sure what that means but she's hurt.
You getting homesick and you're tired of being treated like a god and they're right there for you. Grounding you, being your home, and being the place where you don't have to be a god.
They're just a beacon of comfort for you and you them so you're stuck to each other 24/7 much to the dismay of the archons
They'd love to get to be closer to you but your lover takes up all of your time
But you're so happy, you never smiled that much before they came. You enjoyed Teyvat much more when they were around.
It hurt the archons, but they knew that you were happiest this way. They could tell with every breath of Teyvat that you were giddy when your lover was around. To which, they couldn't argue them taking up all of your time.
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Begone, Bitch
Prompts: Hi ! I just wanted to say that i love your stories and the way you write the characters ! If you want, could you write about Virgil being comforted by the other sides, or him getting hurt while protecting the others ? - anon
I am beyond grateful for every fic you write, you are so good at pushing all the right emotional buttons to just make my entire day. I don't want to be greedy since you already make so much good content, but in 'Lie to Me' there was that little one off scene in the kitchen where Virgil pushes Janus behind him to 'protect ' him from Roman and I *cannot* stop thinking about it. I would die for a whole fic of Virgil protecting Janus(and the others, but mostly Janus, I like when people are sweet to the snake boy) from danger by physically shielding him with his body. Overprotective Virgil is my favorite. So this is a prompt/request but only if you really really want to <3 And thank you for writing such wonderful fic. - awitchbravestheverge
Ah yes more opportunities to write in Virgil's narration style.
Read on Ao3
Warnings: none, not really. Some creepy shadow shit from the Subconcious and Virgil gets a little hurt but nothing graphic
Pairings: platonic found family babey
Word Count: 4504
The Subconscious is a nasty piece of work. It’s not quite powerful enough to overtake the Mindscape by itself, Roman and Remus do too good of a job holding the barriers in the Imagination, but that doesn’t mean little shits don’t worm their way through every now and then. Guess who gets the fantastic job of being alert to each and every single one of them?
No fucking prizes for guessing who.
The Subconscious is a nasty piece of work. It’s not quite powerful enough to overtake the Mindscape by itself, Roman and Remus do too good of a job holding the barriers in the Imagination, but that doesn’t mean little shits don’t worm their way through every now and then. Guess who gets the fantastic job of being alert to each and every single one of them?
No fucking prizes for guessing who.
For the most part, Virgil’s able to work undetected. Or, well, no, the others will see him doing shit but they don’t know that’s what he’s doing. He just has to stand between them and whatever gross slimy black thing has crawled its way up from the depths of the Subconscious and it’ll get absorbed. Part of Thomas’s background anxiety until he can banish back to the hellhole from whence it came.
That doesn’t always mean it’s…painless.
Some of them are fine. Some of them are like little misty bits that just putter around where they’re not fucking supposed to be and Virgil can just pluck them out of the air and stuff them into the pockets of his hoodie and wait. These ones really like to bother Patton, for some reason.
Patton’s baking today, cinnamon sugar muffins. He’s humming to himself as he bustles about the kitchen with that weird boundless energy of his that makes everyone want to think about nothing but sunshine. Ruins the hell out of Virgil’s gloomy emo image but hey, fresh muffins. Sacrifices must be made somewhere.
“Did you want to help, Virgil, or are you fine with just sitting there?”
Virgil blinks, having zoned out after the third time watching one of the containers almost fall over. “Nah, I’m good.”
Patton shrugs. “If you change your mind…”
“I won’t, Pat, I’m good. You’re doing great.”
“Aw, thanks!”
Virgil opens his mouth to say something else when he sees a little grey thing twisting in the air next to Patton’s head. He suppresses a sigh and reaches out, careful to make sure Patton’s back is turned as he snags the pesky little thing and whips it away. He stuffs his hand in his pocket as soon as Patton turns around.
“What was that?”
“What was what,” Virgil asks, blinking innocently as he squeezes the icy thing in his pocket, “what’re you talking about?”
Ah, it’s the hands-on-the-hips dad pose today. “I saw you reach for something, mister, now what did you do?”
“Don’t worry about it.” The misty little shit shrivels and disappears, leaving an ice-cold sting on his hand out of sight. “It’s fine.”
“Show me your hands.”
“What?”
“Show me your hands, Virgil.”
Virgil sighs and pulls the unstung hand out of his pocket. “See,” he says, waving it for good measure, “nothing to see here.”
Patton just raises an eyebrow. “And what about the other one?”
“C’mon, Pat—“ he sighs when both of Patton’s eyebrows go up— “fine, here.”
Patton’s eyes widen when he sees the mark on Virgil’s palm. He rushes forward instantly, cradling the injured hand and reaching for a towel. Conveniently, he gets one that was quite near where the misty thing had been floating.
“You could’ve told me you were hurt,” he says softly, tending to the sting with such tenderness that Virgil almost believes it’s something to worry about, “I would’ve helped.”
“But it’s fine, Pat,” Virgil sighs, “I could’ve dealt with it.”
“I know, I know.” Patton gives the hand one last dab with the towel before pronouncing it good enough. “But it’s never a crime to let us help you, kiddo.”
The corner of Virgil’s mouth tugs up. “Thanks, Pat.”
“Oh, of course, kiddo. Now you sit tight, the muffins won’t be another ten minutes.”
“Can’t wait.”
2.
Sometimes the Subconscious decides it’s bored of letting just the little misty bastards out and lets out the fucking ooze.
Have you ever seen Venom? Know how the symbioses move and how weird it is to look at?
Yeah, it kinda looks like that, just without the gay domesticity and mutual pining.
Nah, this ooze is mindless, just wants to—well, it doesn’t want anything, it just gets fucking everywhere. Makes it real hard to think sometimes, messes everything up.
Really likes fucking with Logan. Which first off, is not allowed. Don’t fuck with Logan. Don’t fuck with any of them, Virgil can and will kick your ass, but especially don’t fuck with Logan. Remus will tear you apart and no one will stop him. Except for Logan. Maybe. ‘Cause he’s nice like that.
Anyway, Virgil gets a weird tingle between his shoulders when there’s an oozy bitch up and about. He’s sitting on the couch, minding his own damn business, but then there’s that itch between his shoulders and he perks his head up.
Logan sits in a chair, alternating between scrolling on his laptop and making notes in one of his many notebooks. Virgil frowns, looking around, seeing if there’s any goo to keep track of, only to come up with nothing. Huh.
“Virgil?”
“Yeah?”
Logan tilts his head, concerned. “Are you alright? You look worried.”
He shakes his head, still squinting around the room. “Weird feeling, that’s it.”
“Will you let me know if it gets unbearable?” Virgil nods. “Thank you. Well, I’m going to get some more coffee, would you like any?”
“Uh, yeah, sure, L, that’d be great.”
Logan nods and stands, going to the kitchen. Leaving his laptop unattended on the coffee table.
Virgil watches as a truly massive ooze slides out from between the couch cushions and toward the laptop.
Not today you slimy bastard.
Unfortunately, he’s just a second too slow as a tendril from the ooze touches the laptop and yanks, pulling the laptop off the coffee table and sending it hurtling toward the floor. Virgil bites back a curse and lunges. His hand grabs the ooze just as his arm catches the laptop.
“Get back here, you little shit,” he grunts, opening his hand and using his power to suck the frothing fucker into his arm where it can go the fuck back to the Subconscious.
“Virgil, you—“
Shit.
Virgil looks up, a little guilty, as Logan comes back around the corner holding two coffee mugs. He looks down and raises an eyebrow.
“You…saved my laptop?”
“It was falling,” Virgil mutters, setting the precious cargo back on the coffee table, “didn’t want it to.”
“Ah. Well, thank you. I appreciate it.” Logan sets one of the coffee mugs down and reaches out a hand to help him up. “Though I assure you it is not the first time that laptop has been dropped.”
“What do you do with your stuff, Lo, I swear you make more cryptic remarks about it than J.”
“It’s all part of the experiment.”
“See, there you go again!”
3.
And then, then sometimes the Subconscious decides oh, it wants to get inventive and spawn this horrific little ooze-demons. Goat head, four legs, runs about like a creepy little horror game creature, they’re fucking awful. They don’t all look the same but they’re always running and climbing about like some gross as hellcat gremlins. Their nails are so sharp.
These fuckers really like messing with Janus. He’s got too many fun things to pull on, too many heavy clothes for them to pull and make him trip, and they like scurrying up his staff too much. They’re absolute fucking nightmares.
The good news is they’re by far the most obvious of the obnoxious little shits that manage to slip through the barriers of the Subconscious. Virgil hears a weird skittering in his ears and knows that one of the little monsters is loose again. Given how they all flock to Janus like he’s some fucking homing beacon, it’s easy to find them.
Janus is pacing back and forth, yanking angrily at the end of his clothes like they’re about to snag on something, his staff clutched in his hand. His head is down, muttering to himself as Virgil walks up.
“J?”
His head whips around. “Oh. Virgil. Certainly expected to see you here.”
“That’s me, always turning up where I’m not wanted.”
“I didn’t say that,” Janus mumbles, resuming his pacing, “though I didn’t mean to summon you. You can go.”
“You didn’t summon me, J,” Virgil says, leaning against the wall and looking around for wherever the bastards are, “I’m here of my own free will.”
“Free will,” Janus scoffs, turning around, “what the hell even is that?”
Out of the corner of his eye, Virgil spots movement.
“It’s not like there’s some master document of humans where free will is written into it.”
Slowly, Virgil raises his hand toward the spot, not tearing his eyes off it.
“And the belief that animals don’t have it! Ha, some of them exhibit characteristics of choice much more than we do.”
The little fucker snaps at his fingers as he makes a grab for it. He snags it by the scruff of the beck and yanks.
“And what is this about it being provable? Show me one scientific theory that has space in it for free will. Do it, I dare you.”
Virgil bites back a curse as he wrests the pesky shit around the middle, ignoring the way it chomps and snarls at him.
“Just because you have or don’t have free will doesn’t make you exempt from the constraints of society. Even if you aren’t making your own choices that doesn’t mean you’re the exception to the consequences.”
The teeth that sink into the sleeve of his hoodie are the last to vanish as Virgil breathes out, watching the last of it fade as Janus turns around.
“Sorry,” he mumbles, tugging his hat and gloves, “haven’t been…”
“S’okay, J,” Virgil waves with the hoodie sleeve that isn’t ripped, “you’re good. Come on, let’s go eat something.”
“…pasta?”
“Sure thing, danger noodle.”
“Ugh, I take it back.”
“Whatever you say, hazard macaroni.”
“I’m taller than you!”
4.
It makes sense that the Subconscious decides to send the most insidious shit after the twins. They’re the reason the pieces of shit monsters can’t make it up to the rest of them. And for the most part, they know what to look for. They don’t have the same awareness of all the little idiosyncrasies that Virgil does, but they beat back a fair number of them on their own.
Which is why the ones they can’t are tricky.
Remus is Dark Creativity, he lives in the muck with the monsters. Thrives in it. Loves the way the gross and the unwanted and the sickening twist and turn about his realm, thrills in the horrified swoop in his stomach when something truly gruesome rears its ugly fuckin’ head.
What he can’t deal with is the fog.
The first time Virgil saw it, he honestly thought it was smoke. He thought Remus had set something on fire and panicked, reaching through to try and find the blaze, find Remus, find a goddamn fire extinguisher, but it was cold.
Like…really cold.
You know how when the air is really humid it feels like it has a weight to it? Like it hangs over you like a wet rag that you just can’t shake off?
Imagine that but cold.
Virgil shivers and reaches forward, trying to find Remus. He’s still never gotten used to it, even though he’s seen it so many times now. Remus doesn’t make it out of his room when the fog comes. He blames it on creative block but Janus always hisses gently when he says that.
“Remus? Remus,” Virgil calls using his tempest tongue, “where are you, buddy?”
He can’t see Remus yet, but the call did its work. The fog ripples in front of him, almost shying away from the sound waves as he moves. He keeps calling, keeps watching the fog almost flinch as it recedes from him. His voice grows louder, louder. The fog begins to retreat in earnest.
Finally, he sees Remus, curled up on his bed, staring at the wall. Virgil muffles a curse as he strides forward, crooning as softly as he can in tempest tongue while glaring furiously at the fog as it sheepishly retreats. As the last of it fizzles, Remus’s head comes to flop on Virgil’s shoulder.
“Hey, spider-ling,” he mumbles, “when’d you show up?”
“A few minutes ago.” Virgil brushes Remus’s hair off his forehead. “You looked upset, bud, wanted to come check on you.”
“Fucking fine,” comes the slur, signifying that Remus is anything but, “I’m fucking fine, babe.”
“You’re exhausted and cold.” Virgil scoops him up into his arms. “Come on. Let’s go find J. He’ll spoil you.”
Sure enough, as soon as Janus sees Remus lying in Virgil’s arms, he jumps up with a coo and takes the other side from him, lying him down on something warm and promising to get him something warm to drink. No, Remus, not engine fuel. Something safer, at least for right now.
Virgil stands at the door, waiting.
There’s an itch between his shoulders and another chill down his spine.
A cloud of fog emerges from down the hallway. From it, three shadow gremlins canter toward him.
He grits his teeth and braces.
The first one collides with his shoulder and he grabs it, squeezing until the shadow folds in on itself. The second hits his shin and he punts it into a wall, scooping the remnants and absorbing them. The third one vanishes in a quick shout of tempest tongue.
You’re not gonna get them, he thinks as he shouts the fog away, not on my goddamn watch.
5.
The worst part of the Subconscious is the shadows.
Because they all have shadows. They all do. That’s just the nature of being an opaque thing and existing in proximity near light sources. Shadows are a natural by-product of blocking light, that’s it.
Wow, he’s been spending more time with Logan than he thought. Sweet.
But the Subconscious shadows are different. There’s no such thing as dark. Only an absence of light. There is no substance known as ‘dark,’ sure there’s dark energy or dark matter if you go the physics route, but there isn’t a thing ‘dark’ the way there’s a thing ‘light.’
If you looked at the Subconscious shadows, you’d believe otherwise.
They look normal. They look just like normal shadows. Something resting against the wall casts a shadow. Something moving in front of a window casts a shadow. Something sitting on the edge of the desk casts a shadow.
But these shadows move.
You have to pay such close attention to even catch them. You have to know precisely what on your desk is casting what part of the shadow when—hold on, what is that? Is it the water bottle? No, you pick up the water bottle and the cylinder two spaces across move. So you pick up the lamp and no, that’s not it either. You move your hand—your hand’s shadow is easy to track—and you move it to where it should be overlapping with whatever’s casting that shadow. You look closer. But there’s nothing blocking the light where your hand is, nothing between the light and the wall.
You stare at the shadow.
And then it moves.
See? They’re fucking terrifying. Like some Peter Pan gone wrong shit. Creepy, sinister, innocuous-looking, you’ve got to be constantly on guard to catch them. You have to be smart. These ones, out of all the Subconscious monsters, feel the most spiteful. Like they’re doing this on purpose, to terrorize the Mindscape.
That’s probably why they go for Roman.
Roman holds the barriers the most. Remus pushes them to reinforce them, but Roman draws the lines in the sand. Roman is responsible for keeping Thomas safe from the barriers breaking, is largely responsible for Thomas being able to see the Sides at all.
So of course the Subconscious hates him.
Roman is the only one who will summon Virgil when he thinks there’s something wrong. Sure, it’s never been quite as simple as Virgil showing up and Roman telling him he’s scared, he thinks something just moved. They used to just throw barbs at each other until Roman was distracted enough for Virgil to suck up the shadow, or fight until Virgil pointed out where it was and Roman said it was just a test, but they’re better now.
Virgil appears in Roman’s room and immediately looks around. Roman sits on the bed, his hands folded primly over the sword in his lap, polishing the pommel with forced calm.
“There are at least three,” he says, his voice perfectly even, “I can’t keep track of them anymore.”
“It’s okay, Princey,” Virgil says softly, turning and turning to try and catch them, “I’m here now. You did a good thing calling me. Are you alright?”
“I’m here,” Roman says, forcing a little false cheer into it, “not the biggest fan of what’s happening, but I’m here.”
Virgil smiles at him briefly before he sees the flicker.
There.
“Roman,” he says calmly, “I need you to go stand by the window.”
Roman gets up and walks to the window, sitting under the sill and closing his eyes. Virgil grits his teeth and makes his shadow overlap with the one on the wall.
It burns as he starts to absorb it, writhing in protest and screeching silently for the others to come help. Sweat begins to bead on Virgil’s forehead as two move shadows race to enlarge his silhouette. Goddamn, they’re vicious tonight. What the hell would they have done to Roman if he hadn’t called?
Not on my goddamn watch.
He’s panting by the time they’re gone, but he’s alright. He’s good. They’re gone. Roman is safe. He turns and opens his arms, letting Roman come and bury his face in the crook of his neck.
“Thank you,” Roman murmurs quietly, “sorry.”
“Don’t apologize, Princey, this is my job.” He claps Roman on the shoulder. “You did good too.”
Roman huffs. “I sat in the corner. That’s not much.”
“And you did great. Now come on, Pat’s making cookies.”
“Oh, right, is it Remus’s night to help?”
“Yeah.”
“Hmmm…maybe we should swing by and warn Logan first.”
“Good idea.”
+1.
Nothing’s happened in a while and Virgil is getting worried.
Normally the longest they go without an incident is a month, maybe, and then it’s normally back-to-back nonsense for like a week.
But it’s been three months. And nothing. No misty tendrils, no puddles of ooze, no snapping gremlins, no fog, no shadows. Virgil’s just about on the verge of running a round-the-clock patrol of the damn place just to make sure he doesn’t miss anything.
As it turns out, he needn’t have bothered.
Stupid, stupid. Idiot.
He fucking missed it. He fucking missed it.
All the other Sides had monsters that went after them specifically. Why should Virgil get left out?
The Subconscious hadn’t been stopping, or slowing down, no. It had been biding its fucking time.
And now…
Virgil scrambles backward, trying to keep himself between the door to the Imagination and the figure in front of him. They slash at him again and he dodges just in the nick of time. He winces, claps a hand to his chest, and literally feels his heart skip a beat as his hand passes right through.
He’s being absorbed.
The figure raises a dripping, shadowy arm and brings the weapon down again. Virgil can’t stop dodging long enough to get a good look at it. He only knows that it fucking hurts and that it’s draining him. Draining him back into the Subconscious.
If he can just keep it here, if he can just hold off long enough to figure out what to do—
Another slash comes down on his arm and he yells, tempest tongue dying in his throat. That one fucking hurt.
He throws a handful of dirt up just to see if maybe it will blind them or give them a moment’s pause but no. The dirt just sinks into it like some fucking nightmare vacuum. The next strike collides.
“Virgil? Virgil?”
“What the fuck is that thing?”
“It’s draining him, move!”
“Hang on, Virgil, we’re coming!”
“Don’t you fucking dare hit him again!”
The figure turns, only to jump out of the way when Remus’s Morningstar smashes into the ground where they had been standing. Remus growls, ripping it out of the soil and swinging again. The figure parries the blow only to let out an inhuman wail as Roman’s sword slices its arm.
“Get the fuck away from him,” Remus snarls.
“Back!” Roman swings again, driving them away from Virgil. “Back, foul beast!”
“Don’t insult them by comparing the beasts to whatever the fuck this is.”
Logan rushes up before Virgil can open his mouth to ask what the fuck is going on, dropping to his knees and pressing something warm to Virgil’s chest.
“Virge? Virge, stay with me,” he calls softly, “come on, it’s alright, we’re here now.”
“How—“ Virgil gasps as his chest starts to…resolidify? “How did you—what? How?”
“Oh, Virgil,” Logan murmurs, rubbing whatever the miracle thing on his chest is in small circles, “did you really think we never noticed that you were trying to fight them by yourself?”
Oh.
Oh, fuck.
“Shh,” he soothes, helping Virgil up into a seated position, “it’s okay. We’re not mad. Just worried. You’re hurt.”
“Fuck!”
“Just stab them, Ro.”
“I’m trying!”
Despite himself, Virgil huffs a laugh as he leans against Logan. “Are they—we should help.”
“You,” Logan says sternly, “will sit here and let me finish making sure you won’t be drained. The twins can handle themselves.”
Still, Virgil’s heart stays in his throat until he spies something else running up the hill. A shadow beast, a massive one.
“Logan, look out—”
Logan turns and—
Who the fuck gave Logan a gun?
The shadow beast has flopped over onto its side and dissipated, Logan already back to tending to Virgil’s wound but the time Virgil’s dizzy, half-drained brain figures out what just happened.
“You…you shot it.”
Logan quirks an eyebrow. “You sound surprised.”
“Remus!”
“Get back!”
“What the hell is it doing?”
“It’s growing, shit, Ro, we gotta fall back.”
“Guard Logan, check on Virgil, I’m right behind you!”
The twins rush up and form a guard around Logan and Virgil as the shadow figure swells. Virgil’s eyes widen as it growls, growing larger and larger and larger still until the shadows look strapped at the seams, fit to burst. It grows claws. It grows teeth. It grows more limbs than he can count.
It leers down at them and opens a gaping, black maw.
“Now!”
Roman crouches down to shield him as dirt flies up around them. Logan bends in too as something equally massive soars overhead. Virgil manages to peek between Roman and Remus to see a blur of green tackle the monster.
“Is that…is that Patton?”
“I believe it’s ‘Lily Pad-ton,’” Logan corrects wryly as the twins snicker, “but…yes.”
Judging by the roar of the monster, he’s doing something.
“Where’s Janus,” he hears Roman hiss, “he should’ve been here by now.”
“There!”
Remus points and Virgil spots a fucking enormous yellow snake unhinging its jaw. The monster howls as it starts to vanish down the snake’s gullet.
“Holy fuck.”
“I think Janny’s hungry.”
“Pissed off, more like.” Roman lays a hand protectively on Virgil’s shoulder, squeezing encouragingly as Virgil gasps at the contact. “Whatever that thing is hurt Virgil.”
Remus growls in assent.
The thing in Virgil’s chest starts to burn hotter. Logan shushes him gently as he whines in pain.
“It’s alright, Virgil, you’re almost done. We’re right here, just breathe.”
“You’re safe, sweetheart,” Roman murmurs as he starts to list side to side, “we’ve got you.”
“Nothing’s gonna fucking touch you,” he hears Remus snarl as he passes out, “promise.”
He comes to an indeterminate amount of time later, laid out on the couch, his head in Patton’s lap. He blinks.
“Hey, kiddo,” Patton murmurs, stroking his hair, “you feel any better?”
“Um, yeah,” he mumbles, turning a little and wincing at the pull in his chest, “what…what happened?”
“We won.” Roman pats his arm. “All safe now. You did great.”
“All I did was lie there.”
“Yeah, and you did great.” He winks.
Virgil’s gaze rolls around to catch Logan setting down a glass of water and crouching by his head.
“L?”
“You’re all better physically,” Logan says softly, “but it might take some time for you to feel like it. Just take it easy for a while.”
“And that means,” comes Remus’s voice from over the couch, “you gotta let us help defend you too.”
Virgil flushes. “But it’s not your job.”
“Are you insinuating that our job is not to take care of you?” Roman holds his hand to his chest in a mock gasp. “Because that is rude.”
Patton gives his hair a gentle tug. “We’re gonna look after you, kiddo, you deserve it.”
“I—um…” Virgil swallows heavily. “But if I dealt with it properly you wouldn’t have to.”
A soft hiss comes from the chair. Virgil looks and sees Janus sitting there, one leg crossed over the other. He smiles softly.
“You can let us help you, sweetie,” he murmurs, “rest for a little. Don’t try and take on the Subconscious by yourself.”
“…okay.” He squints. “Wait, why are you all the way over there?”
“Digesting,” Janus says, completely dignified.
Virgil snorts. “I’m just sad I missed it.”
“Oh, it was fucking epic.”
“Language, kiddo.”
“Oh, come on, you were great—“
Logan chuckles next to his head as Virgil drifts back off to sleep with a smile on his face.
…he is gonna ask who gave Logan a gun after he wakes up properly.
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#dragonbabbles#fic#sanders sides#lamp#dlamp#dlampr#virgil sanders#roman sanders#logan sanders#patton sanders#janus sanders#deceit sanders#sympathetic deceit#remus sanders#sympathetic remus
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First off, you're a lesbian and that gives you some immunity, secondly, I think it's that Tom Hiddleston has a pretty gentle disposition, so his fangirls are apt to say, "[insert character here] is a woobie and has done nothing wrong!"
My question was less "why do people woobify Thomas" and more "where are people seeing this massive erasure of Thomas' abuse by his parents and subsequently Lucille, because I've never noticed that in circles that think enough about the movie to discuss the characters in-depth." And the OP answered, sort of- they were thinking more of general audiences, not the CPeak fandom specifically. Inasmuch as those audiences ignore pretty much anything deep about any of the characters, they are right.
(Though I'm not sure said audiences think enough about Thomas' abuse to "blame him for it," as the original post mentioned.)
I'm immune to sexual/romantic attraction to the character, but certainly not to This Man Is Babey Syndrome- which I definitely have for Thomas in spades. It's just kind of tempered into This Man Is Coward Babey Who Ignores Murder Until It Becomes Inconvenient For Him, Personally Syndrome.
Pairs nicely with my love for his sister, AKA This Woman Is Possessive Babey Who Does Serial Murder And Also Manipulates The Shit Out of Everyone Around Her, Including The Sole Person She Loves Syndrome.
Unfortunately, I rather suspect most of the complaints about people "ignoring Thomas' abuse" boil down to "not treating him like the aforementioned Innocent Helpless Woobie and/or not believing Lucille is Pure Nuance-Free Evil." I've encountered one Brain-Worms Take(TM) that seemed like it kind of downplayed what he went through, and it was from around the time the movie came out. More recently, I've seen nothing.
Maybe I'm somehow missing a massive cohort of Thomas-Haters- but I confess I doubt it.
At the end of the day, though, it's not that big a deal. We're all doing our own little media analysis in our own little bubbles, free to interpret things however we want. They're not hurting me. I'm not trying to stop them from thinking or saying whatever they like. I just find it an interesting phenomenon within my fandom to examine.
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for the character asks- idk anyone from the maze runner but your favourite and least favourite :)
KINDA RANTY BUT AAA OK
(The Maze Runner book + prequels spoilers below)
ok ok ok. Favorite is Newt. He’s just an amazing person, I instantly fell in love with him once he was introduced. He’s super emotionally intelligent, which I deeply admire in people irl and adore seeing in his interactions with Thomas. I also love how he’s written as a leader, and he’s unironically one of my role models in terms of his way with people. We share some personal shit (constantly questioning if we’re good enough, lil stubborn, lil too stressed over small things). He always fights for his friends to the very end, loves whole heartedly (even if his anger does get in the way), and would probably be one of the most fun people to be around irl.
After reading the infamous page 250, I almost burst into tears, which is super rare for me with any form of media.
Honorable mention is Minho. Love that soft impulsive bastard to death.
Least favorite is probably Ava Paige. The whole series makes her character seem so omniscient and necessary to the plot (so that readers will buy The Fever Code), only to reveal that there was really nothing that deep. Hell, she was the first face of ”the enemy” the main characters saw, wrote detailed reports for the epilogues, and is the fairy fucking godmother that steps in when Thomas is about to be sacrificed! And then we see in the prequel she starts off as a simple low level doctor, gets power hungry, and then weeks later with minimal explanation, regrets her decisions (but the reader experiences the latter part of the redemption arc before the first…?). There was so much potential and high expectations that just fell flat (and made WICKED seem less motivated and strong and whatever). I realize most of the problem here is that the author Does Not Know How To Write Women, but I still highly dislike her for her blandness.
Honorable mention for least favorite is Janson. Fuck Janson.
here’s Newt’s card. I could write a whole essay about how dirty he was done by the narrative just by his character development being time skipped for ~150 pages in The Scorch Trials (I’ve only read the books). But as you can tell, he is my babey ray of sunshine, and I would die for him.
here’s Ava’s card. sooooo close to a bingo, it’s actually infuriating. anyways, I explained myself in my lil rant above. i wish Ava had more of a central role as an antagonist, either through WICKED employees saying her name more, attributing certain things to her, talking about The Purge and how she heroically stepped in and continued onward. in conclusion, yes, i want her to be a worse person than she already is.
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Hi! Welcome to my Masterlist! I write OC fanfiction, so if that is not your thing please turn back. I do have to put a disclaimer here and say that there is no guarantee that any of the fics here will actually be finished. I am distracted by many WIPs. But below the cut I have DCEU, The Maze Runner, Teen Wolf, and MCU fanfiction! So enjoy if you would like to!
The Power of Suffering
Summary: Gally was one of the toughest and one of the strongest fighters the Right Arm had ever seen. He took no shit, lead with an iron fist, and had a wit like a whip. But combat medic Joan got to him in a way he couldn’t really describe. She was kind to the point of stupidity, honest, and always saw the best in people. She broke down his walls and forced him to face the vulnerable part of himself he wanted to bury. But what happens when these two opposites are forced to face their feelings for each other instead?
OFC: Joan
ONE | TWO | THREE | FOUR | FIVE | SIX | SEVEN | EIGHT | NINE
Status: In Progress
Darkness and Light
Summary: Sloane is a local Gotham artist asked to paint a portrait of Thomas and Martha Wayne. During this process she meets their son Bruce, a recluse who has seemingly forgotten how to interact with the world. Over the course of several months, Sloane brings out a different side to Bruce Wayne, while also somehow continuously running into The Batman. But will she eventually connect the dots?
OFC: Sloane Di Marzio
ONE | TWO | THREE | FOUR | FIVE | ?
Status: In Progress
Of Mermaids, Werewolves, and Men
Summary: Maggie Whittemore never wanted to become a werewolf, let alone a mermaid. But there she was, a junior in high school, a cross country runner, film buff, and a long thought lost healer ally of the local werewolf pack lead by one of her best friends. After her twin brother is brought back from the dead and her first boyfriend Matt is killed, she tries to escape to some normalcy in London over the summer. But she comes back from that trip with new found feelings for her best friend Stiles.
OFC: Maggie Whittemore
ONE
Status: Finished?
If I Go, I’m Goin’ Crazy
Summary: There was a reason Amanda Waller always seemed to be three steps ahead of everybody. Only no one would have guessed that she had an actual psychic at her side at all times. But when this psychic sees the death of one Colonel Rick Flag, who is so kind to her, she can’t help but warn him of his impending doom on missions - again, and again, and again.
OFC: Delphia Holman
masterlist babey
Status: Finished?
Youthfully Felt (Gaius Chau - Into the Badlands)
Summary: Song Page has lived at White Bone manor her entire life, being trained by her Healer mother and Clipper father for something they never told her about. But the mundanity of her life is turned on its head when Gaius Chau, the Baron’s son, walks into the infirmary when her mother is away.
OFC: Song Page
ONE | TWO | THREE | ?
Status: On Hiatus
Someone In Brooklyn Misses You
Summary: There are some people who are meant to be together in this world, some people who are meant to drift apart, and some people who are never destined to meet. Rose Rigby and Bucky Barnes are all three of these things at once. Two people who were meant to be together from the beginning, meant to be separated by lifetimes, and that, once separated, should never have come back together again.
OFC: Rose Rigby
ONE | TWO | THREE | FOUR | FIVE | SIX | SEVEN | EIGHT | NINE | TEN
Status: On Hiatus
Grow Old With You
Summary: There was once more of this fic, and this is all that remains. So take this as a: What if Din settled down on a farm and had a baby with a fellow Mandalorian who has been with him since the beginning?
OFC: Ara Obagh
Reykha’s Birth
Status: finished
Normal Love and Superheroes (John Blake - The Dark Knight) ABANDONED WORK
Summary: Leena Duckett has had a hard year after being cheated on by high-school sweetheart Jacob Grayson. She's working two jobs, living in a studio apartment with long-time friend Jamie, her art career has yet to take off, and she hasn't been on a date in a very....Very long time. But things take a turn when she meets friendly officer John Blake and billionaire playboy Bruce Wayne. Just when it looks like Leena is finally getting turned around, Jacob comes back into town with the intent of getting her back. The only question is: Who will she choose? The officer or the boy she's familiar with?
OFC: Leena Duckett
the orange streak of lightning | my city | superdawgs | part 4 | part 5 | part 6 | part 7
Status: Abandoned
The Second Hand Ticks (Arthur - Inception)
Summary: Sarai Jourdain and Arthur Darling are longing to retire to the French countryside. However, in order to do so, they need to finish this one last job with mutual friend and colleague Dom Cobb. The job turns out to be more difficult than they thought, and something neither of them ever expected was their mutual ex, Warren Eames, to come back into their lives.
OFC: Sarai Jourdain
ONE | TWO | THREE | FOUR | FIVE | SIX
Status: On Hiatus
Your Power Over Me (Frank Shaver - Project Power) ABANDONED WORK
Summary: Frank Shaver has more reasons than loving New Orleans to want Power out of his city.
OFC: Michelle Shaver
beginning | motivation | power | home
Status: Abandoned
#masterlist#romanticgumchewer masterlist#inception#arthur inception#arthur#arthur x original character#arthur x oc#arthur x sarai jourdain#the dark knight rises#john blake#john blake x original character#john blake x oc#john blake x leena duckett#project power#project power netflix#frank shaver#frank shaver x original character#frank shaver x oc#frank shaver x michelle shaver#mcu#catws#bucky barnes#the winter soldier#bucky barnes x original character#bucky barnes x oc#bucky barnes x rose rigby#the mandalorian#din djarin#din djarin x original character#din djarin x oc
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me: wanna see fic?
three people: like the post
me: that’s good enough for me, babey!!!
alright it’s an extract from this fic i’ll probably never post about Gordon and how his perception of / relationship with Edward has probably changed over the years (thus the bit at the end makes a touch more sense in that context)
but this bit’s just some epic banter with the lads as gordon wakes up from a nap. 486 words
------ -------- -------
Gordon woke to the smell of good food, the sound of muffled laughter, and a sort of innate sense of comfort he’d not felt in a very long time. He felt… heavy. Almost like his limbs were leaden. Like having to get out of a warm bed on a cold winter’s morning, he just really didn’t want to move. So he let himself relax, and just listen to the sound of quiet conversation.
“…Uno?” came Edward’s confused voice.
“Yeah, you got it!” Percy’s voice cheered him on.
“Pick up four, Thomas,” Henry’s voice followed. “And the colour is yellow.”
“Fuck,” Thomas grumbled. “I won’t be able to hold all these cards! This is bullying. I’m being bullied.”
Henry was laughing, and then there was the plop of a card on the table, before he heard Edward sigh.
“I’m sorry!” Percy squeaked. “It’s not personal!”
“Everything’s personal when it comes to Uno,” Thomas argued.
“Fine, fine,” Edward said. “Henry, it’s your turn.”
“Nope,” Henry said, slapping a card down, “it’s yours.”
“Stop bullying me!” Thomas exclaimed, voice finally rising above a mumble. “Why can’t you let me have a turn?! That’s the fourth time you’ve changed the direction on me!”
“Shh, you’ll wake Gordon,” Henry hushed him, but Gordon could practically hear the smile in his voice.
There was a pause, before the slap of a card thrown on a table, and a series of groans mixed with cheers as Edward hazarded, “I win?”
“Yay!” Percy cheered. “Edward won his first game of Uno! I’m truly the best teacher.”
“Rigged!” Thomas banged a fist on the table. “Beginner’s luck!”
Henry started laughing.
“Oh, you’re laughing?” Thomas demanded. “Pick up two.”
“Pick up four, Percy,” Henry countered.
“Um,” Percy said. “Pick up six, Thomas.”
There was a pause, a dramatic one, before there was once again the sound of a card once again slapping down on a table, and Thomas declared. “No, Henry. Pick up eight.”
The sounds of indignation from Henry caused much laughter, and finally, Gordon cracked open his eyes to see what on earth was going on.
“Oh, now look what you’ve done, you’ve woken Gordon!” Henry’s voice finally rose, and Gordon snorted as he sat up and stretched.
Thomas laughed, before leaning over the back of his chair to grin at Gordon. “Good morning!”
“Hrgn, good morning to you too,” Gordon mumbled, before slumping back into his comfort of his armchair. God, he felt sore all over. “Smells good.”
“Shit!” Henry exclaimed, rising to his feet so quickly he nearly knocked his chair over. “The roast!”
Edward was laughing. It was a sound Gordon had missed. He was laughing loud and long and such a cheerful sound that Gordon couldn’t help but smile himself, and ease himself up out of his chair as Henry thundered past.
--- --- ---
#ttte#ttte humanized#ttte gordon#ttte edward#ttte percy#ttte thomas#ttte henry#dj's writing#ttte fic#i realise that this might be a weird way to write a card game but oh well#i also realise that the dynamics are not what were outlined in the tierlist but yknow what it's fun#also in this fic henry is roommates with percy and thomas - where edward and gordon are roommates#thus why henry is familiar w/ uno but edward isnt#long post#<- idk if it's 'long' but i'll tag as courtesy#anyway.............. enjoy#food m#swearing tw
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Alright. So these are just my analysis of the new Sanders sides video and this is just my opinion. U either agree or disagree, Im all ears.
Ok first, I appreciate Patton trying his best here. Like he's trying to explain as much as he can about life and morality and stuff.
I think Patton was trying to say that in life, not everything is as black and white as it seems. Like there will be times where you really gotta make the decision of either being selfish of selfless.
Like there will always be a grey area where in some morals you grew up with don't apply.
So I'm like really proud of Patton in putting in the effort of not being too pushy
CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT EVERYONE!!!!!
Next is the cute little song. Its so adorableeeeeeeeee. Like the animation and everything about it is great!
Oof and the little mini fight between Patton and Janus. Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhits some good shit right there
Next is Roman. I can clearly see him struggling to grasp at the situation. The feeling of confusion on why and how things are supposed to go.
But in the video I think that Roman can't fully accept the fact that life isnt always easy. That even if they do their best, sometimes the result may not be as good as they expected.
Which comes back to the grey area in life. Cause bOi Life isnt fair.
Also I think it was kinda taking it too far when he made fun of Janus in the last bit. Cause I think he's still in the 'Dark Sides' 'Light Sides' mindset which made him act the way he did.
Cause Roman views things as 'good side' 'bad side'. He isnt taking note that all of them are technically neutral sides. Cause all of them can take it too far at some point.
Oof the end part where Roman just exploded hurt.
Its like real hard for me to watch that part man
Next is Logan. He really did an amazing job giving facts about studies and human behavior.
Thomas' team really did some good research on that one✨
Logan also gave another perspective in the episode. Like another point of view on how to access the situation which was great!!
Idk if anyone did this but I rewatched the video just to read every single text Logan was saying.
Janus
bdkxkskaknxjxkx
dUDE. DECIET FINALLY SAID HIS FUCKIN NAME AND IM LOVIN IT.
I love him
I liked the fact that Janus pushed the thought of self care and reminded everyone that self care and mental health are as important as physical health. That it should be practiced and done every once in awhile.
I like Janus' character developement here, he sincerely cares for Thomas and his well being.
Virgil.
WHERE IS MY BABEY.
T - T
I waited so long for him to show up.
But I feel like he was still there but not taking a physical form just like Logan.
Cause you can see the distress and panic Patton and Roman had during the video which to me, it implies that Virgil is still there at the discussion.
Lastly but not the least, Thomas
During that video you can see Thomas really asking the big questions in life. I think Thomas in the video is on the stage of self discovery or finding purpose and meaning. Why and how things are the way they are.
Which is like great cuz, R e l a t a b l e
Which really teaches the viewers a lesson that we need balance in life. That we shouldnt only focus on one thing
B a l a n c e
Making time for ourselves and also helping others when we can.
Which is a great moral of the story btw.
W e l p
That is all. Thank u for coming to my TedTalk.
#Sanderssides spoilers#ts spoilers#tw cursing#sander sides#ts patton#ts virgil#ts roman#ts logan#ts janus#JANUS dude#i fuckin love him#I shouldve guessed it#but i think im still gonna call him dee as a nickname#but D a m n#Janus is a good fuckin name dude#Virgil Sanders#Logan Sanders#Patton Sanders#Roman Sanders#Deceit Sanders
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⧼ jordan fisher, cismale, he/him / KODACHROME by PAUL SIMON + that part of your left eyebrow that never quite grew back after you-know-what, and that singed corner in your apartment that you swore you would clean up but still haven’t gotten around to, and the scorching memories of times you’d rather forget, but still they stay, just like the scar on your brow and the burn in your home. hugging your friends so tight it’s almost too hard to breathe, and even then only letting go when they ask you over and over again. singing and dancing and drinking and causing a ruckus, until the night grows old and there’s hardly anyone left, so you’re left chatting with a warm drink in your hand until finally, finally, you need to sleep. ⧽ ━�� hey, isn’t that SEAMUS FINNIGAN? i read a daily prophet article on them, once ; the 24 year old [ half blood ] WIZARD is a [ GRYFFINDOR alumnus who has gone on to be a QUIDDITCH COMMENTATOR. ]. i’ve heard they can be quite LIVELY & DETERMINED, but i don’t know… they came off very IMMATURE & HEADSTRONG in that interview. it really is hard to know what to believe these days though, isn’t it?
hello everyone!!! i’m cas, i’m so excited to be here and write with you all! for the RECORD, this is my first ever golden-trio rp, and therefore my first everrrrr time writing dear seamus, so this is gonna be a fun journey!!!!! pls bear with me while i figure him out <3 (also, i guarantee u i’m gonna forget about the irish accent constantly while i write, so pls use ur imaginations djgkdjgfksdg)
i’ll set y’all up with the classic: “me dad’s a muggle, mam’s a witch. bit of a nasty shock for him when he found out.”
so yup, he’s a half-blood! from good ol’ kenmare, ireland, where his father lived most his life - he met seamus’ mother in america on a business trip, and they quickly fell in love. she moved to ireland to live with him, and the rest, as they say, is history.
she did forget to mention she was a witch until long after they were married and seamus was born, when he first started showing signs of magic by accidentally turning the cat pink, crying, and turning half the carpet the same ugly shade of pink - in that order.
seamus was is hm.... how 2 say this simply..... a chaotic child. finally turning 11 and getting his hogwarts letter was a big sigh of relief for his parents, who loved him very much but were very excited to finally have some peace and quiet in the household!!!
seamus was equally as excited - the muggle school he was enrolled in was boring, and while he had a decent amount of friends from taking up the title of “class clown,” this paired with the occasional bout of accidental magic got him into a decent amount of trouble.
some of his favorite things about his time at hogwarts, in no particular order: DADA classes, hogsmeade trips, dean thomas, quidditch games, the rest of his friends, gryffindor parties, great hall feasts.
some of his least favorite things about his time at hogwarts, in no particular order: realizing that he wasn’t that special because now everybody else could do magic too (and many of them were better than him at it), potions classes, quidditch tryouts, most slytherins (he’s a biased lad, what can he say).
when shit got real, to put it lightly, seamus didn’t want to believe any of it. he was kind of a brat at first (i say as if he still isn’t a big brat constantly), refusing to believe that you-know-who was back and that war was at their doorstep. he argued with his classmates about it constantly, until finally the truth was undeniable and he allowed himself to be dragged (see: he asked if he could come) to the dumbledore’s army meetings.
and then seventh year, his mom almost didn’t allow him to return to hogwarts because of how bad everything had gotten. she reminded him that he was still just a half blood, and even if things were okay for them at the time, there was no guarantee it would stay that way.
seamus did a lot of growing up that year (better late than never), fully investing in dumbledore’s army and helping the younger students deal with everything going on, all of it culminating with the battle of hogwarts
the battle of hogwarts was chaotic, hard to place any specific thing - a cacophony of flashing lights and shouting and people falling around him. he remembers three things: 1) blowing up the bridge (while the battle itself could obviously not be described as anything close to fun..... come on, that was pretty great), 2) learning his corporeal patronus was a fox (nice), and 3) watching a curse come at him straight from you-know-who’s wand, only to be blocked by harry potter.
after all of that, well, it was just a matter of picking up the pieces, wasn’t it? he helped fix up hogwarts where he could, spent some time at home with his parents, and sorted things out. he didn’t ever really give himself time to think about the events of his last year at hogwarts, because he didn’t want to think about it. he still doesn’t ever really talk about it; we love repression, babey!
after a bit of time at home he decided to move to a very cheap apartment in london bc he wanted to experience the Big City:tm:, where he quickly got a job as a quidditch commentator with [insert generic news station here, cas is tired] which he absolutely fell in love with. he gets to travel to quidditch games all over europe - and the globe during world cup season - and he’s quick to tell people he’s famous in the sports world (hardly true, but some people recognizing his name has gone to his head). in the quidditch off-season (and during some messy overlap), he’s a muggle sports commentator, mostly sticking to tennis.
he’s a bit of a mess but he’s got a heart of gold, sometimes he just needs a lil shoving in the right direction. he loves his friends & his family more than life itSELF and he’ll do anything (see: anything) for ‘em. unless they do something to piss him off, then they get approx. 1-2 weeks of The Seamus-Free Zone before he drops his grudge and all returns to normal
i’m getting out of control so i’m ending it here but pls plot with me and vibe with seamus thank u the end <3
potential connections:
FIRST OFF i’m down for L I T E R A L L Y anything so if you think lil seamus over here might fit a wanted connection you have PLEASE lmk bc i’d love to do anythingggggg
an ex or two, spicy spicy (seamus is bi so the possibilities are endless, as the kids say)
a roommate (oh my god they were roommates; seamus does like hosting get togethers at their place so they’ll either be chill w/ it and enjoy the parties orrrrr they think seamus is the worst roommate ever)
friendsssss gimme friends of all types for this lad
enemiessss, seamus is v hotheaded & it’s easy for people to get on his nerves, but it’s also very easy for him to get on other people’s nerves
fellow quidditch fans, he does give out his spare press tickets like candy, feel free to take him up on that offer
and more! endless possibilities
lil fun things:
he’s a big mama’s boy, 10,000%, loves his mom so frickin’ much
in the world of sports commentary, he’s quite popular among younger fans because he’s extremely biased in quite a comedic way, and he’s gathered quite a decent following for being “that funny sports reporter” (which is, yes, his full instagram bio). he’s always put on for a bit of lighthearted fun, it’s rare that he does any extremely serious commentating, but that’s the way he likes it.
his favorite local team is the Kenmare Kestrals and he’ll never say a bad word about them during games, no matter how bad they play, and during world cup season he obviously always supports ireland. if they don’t make it to the final he nonstop makes quips along the lines of “ireland could’ve done that play better, but we’ll let it slide”
has a french bulldog named gregory, gregory also has an instagram account and has more followers than seamus, don’t bring it up
hosts "small get togethers” (see: parties) in his apartment quite often, thank U silencing charms
good god he’s so very clumsy and is constantly hurting himself (and accidentally setting things ablaze, he doesn’t know how it still happens but it ALWAYS HAPPENS) pls help him
#nox.intro#i always say my intros will be short..... and then they are not#did i proofread this? no#cw fire (suuuper small mention but just a heads up!!)
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I've been building up these hcs for a while, and I finally decided to unleash them onto the world.
So! Here ya go. My unadulterated thoughts over a long period of time. Have fun w them.
Remus bonks his forehead with another's to show affection. It started simply as something his brain told him to do, I think-some twisted idea of knocking both people out by banging their foreheads together. But then it turned into something he did for affection, due to how close it got your face to someone else's and the contact you share. Plus, it's so original, and that's Creativity's whole thing, right??
(It took him awhile to figure out how to do it lightly enough that he wouldn't hurt the person he was bonking (yes it's called that) but he eventually figured it out!!)
Him and Roman do it like,,,super hard as a way of greeting. Or like, just for shits and giggles, or even to knock someone out of something. It's one of those Brotherly Things™ they do together, y'know?
More Brotherly Things™ they do include slamming into each other to hug for the same reasons up above, shaking each other by the shoulders Forcefully mostly whenever they're explaining something Wild or they're Angy and the other pretending to be annoyed by it, and initiating sudden sparring sessions where one will just suddenly whip out their weapon, and the surprise is part of the spar, basically. It's not cheating; you just have to adapt to when the other suddenly starts one.
They had to explain to Patton Very Thoroughly that they weren't hurting each other and that it was all fun and games before he agreed w it
Janus was the first to adapt, then Logan, and then Virgil kinda had to take some time to stop being startled every time it happened
Thomas got it Immediately.
He has brothers.
He gets it.
Janus! Likes!! Dancing!!!!! VERY important hc
Remus and Janus used to make skirts (and possibly other clothing?) together
All three darks know how to sew
It started with Remus wanting to make something and learning with Creativity Powers and eventually teaching Virgil and Janus
Janus actually already knew how to sew simple stitches due to having to fix a lot of Remus' clothes but Remus taught him a lot more abt it
He ended up knowing more than Remus even did, though, due to ending up Really into it
More than once, he has asked Remus for cloth and made his own skirt, shirt, etc. possibly with Remus' help
In a world where Jan and Virge are close,,,,,,,he totally helped with the jacket
Jan and Lo absolutely have debates like. 24/7 while also playing chess
Remus is eternally wearing thigh high high heeled boots, no questions asked
Roman used to wear Normal boots most of the time before he got Good Bro Stats with Remus again. After that he was Jealous that Remus was a bit taller than him and started wearing his own heeled boots, though his were usually normal height
Sometimes they'll switch boots to mix things up
Roman also started wearing heels bc he thought it'd be fun
Roman and Janus have specific nicknames for each other; one nice and one teasing
Janus' are Prince and Beast
Roman's are Beauty (to parallel Janus' for him) and Snake (another parallel; both are simple ideas of what/who they are)
Janus probably came up with his first and Roman flipped the script on him in return
Janus is pretty chill with coffee or tea, but he prefers tea and knows a lot more about it. Coffee? Eh, not too bitter please. Tea? Basically whatever, but the subtle calm stuff is really his jam. Mostly just a tad of honey, rarely any milk, if he ever adds anything at all. He usually takes his tea straight up; the kind to sit around and Think at the table while it cools y'know.
Patton's actually kind of a coffee dude, but he doesn't drink it that much, and if he does, it probably wouldn't be very bitter and pretty doctored. Tea is too mild for him; just tastes like hot water.
Logan? Coffee for energy, but he likes the Calm tea brings. Flower flavors all the way babey, with a bit of honey and just enough milk to make it a bit richer. Since the coffee is purely for Energy, he doesn't give a shit what it tastes like, as long as it doesn't burn his fucking esophagus he's just downing it.
Roman claims he likes tea bc it's Fancy, but he actually prefers Coffee for the chocolate/bitterness in it and the Energy, so there's that. He actually likes his pretty bitter, funnily enough. Really likes chocolate creamers and vanilla, caramel, or chocolate flavored coffee.
And of course, Remus claims he prefers coffee and just downs it all the time (mostly for shits and giggles probably) but he actually likes tea more for all the different flavors and stuff. Plus it's always even MORE scalding than coffee so it's more fun to down! He actually doesn't like how bitter coffee is and if he did actually drink it it would be drowned in creamer I swear to you. He really likes honey in his tea and a bit of milk, maybe some sugar depending on the type? Not usually though. More fruit flavors the better man.
Virgil drinks coffee in the morning for Energy, and he's pretty chill with it, but he kinda prefers tea for the calming shit it can give you. Drinks the coffee for the Energy, but refuses to just let it taste like shit, so he adds a bit of creamer and sugar, yeah. Mostly up for fruit and flowery flavors, honey all the way babey. Thinks sugar tastes like shit in tea.
Janus has a Large Campaign around trying tea straight more often, or just generally adding less sugar, mostly. Virgil is on his team, Remus is kinda on it depending on what tea you're talking about, and Logan is also pretty much on that train except for when it comes to things like english breakfast teas, stuff like that.
Virge wears a pair of headphones around his neck a lot; they're bluetooth, and hooked up to his phone 24/7, basically. He just throws them on and nyOOMS out of the situation best he can when shit gets hectic. They're kinda like a security blanket kind of thing; nice to know that you have immediate access to blocking out the world around you.
His jacket goes about the same, sorta. In the sense that it's a security object, I mean. He just feels...safer with it. There are very few situations besides being Totally Alone where he'd feel safe without a jacket (but specifically the one he's Chosen for the time, though the Chosen One can change if he finds something new or better), but if he does hang out around you without one, know that he trusts you with all his goddamn heart and he is taking a Leap of Faith rn and you better not screw it up ok.
Jan's gloves and hat are in a similar situation. They're just. Always There. They just make him feel safer y'know
Also I'd die for it to be canon that Janus has a little snake under his hat
Roman and Remus totally make copies of their sashes to hang up at Christmas
Yo but like,,,,,,,,,what if the sides' heights correlated to how long they'd been like...around?
Like how long it'd been since they manifested yknow
Pat is like. Emotions so he probably showed up Immediately. Same for Jan, considering he's self preservation. They're almost exactly the same height. Logan is just a small bit shorter, since he's partially curiosity and he showed up just a bit later. The original King would've been the same height as the other two, but...what about Roman and Remus?
So...the Split probably had to have happened after Virgil showed up, which took...a While. He's super short. Now the question is, would the twins be the height of the King, since they're technically part of him, or Tiney-like smaller than Virge-due to when they split?
...just for Tiney Virgil Rights, we'll make em tall. They're exactly the same height, of course, but Remus likes wearing heels.
All the Og Boys are the same height as Thomas-maybe a bit taller?-but Virge is like. A head and a half shorter than most of them. It's hilarious.
All the sides garden, for their own reasons
Virgil does it for the calm, the monotony, and the bright colors and smells. Plus, it just...feels really nice knowing he helped something stay alive. Makes him feel a lil better about himself.
Janus does it because he's been doing it for...a long time. Not to mention the calm of it all, digging your hands into soil and planting something new...plus, the flowers are always beautiful. Always have been, always will be. Tending to them is like...caring for an old friend. And he has so many memories with these flowers...old and new.
Plus he can plant his own tea leaves which is fun.
Logan does it partially for the monotony, partially for the care, partially for helping something to live. Partially for feeling a little something for the little guys; just...a feeling of saying hello again, having...a conversation with the flowers.
Less science, more emotions. For just a moment.
Patton does it because it's fun!! Because the flowers are pretty, the smells are nice, he can plant vegetables, too, the garden just feels nice, it feels like having more friends…
So many good, good reasons.
He'll have conversations with his flowers, and he's named them all.
Most of them haven't named theirs, but they do talk to them every now and then.
Roman does it for the calm and the prettiness and the scents. And just the concept of a pretty garden...excellent. And it is rather nice, just absorbing yourself in the work of it all...it's like all your cares fly away.
(They all agree with that, if only a little.)
He also has a venus flytrap or two...just gifts from Remus.
Remus does it because 1, fun, and 2, weird exotic creepy plants are so cool!!!!!! He's got all kinds of stinky but fascinating plants, yeah, but he also has some really pretty vivid ones. He also has a soft spot for roses…
(...the King was known for handing them out, back in the day, for fun. The twins...never let it go, even though they're unaware.)
He actually has some nice smelling ones here and there, but he mostly bases whether it's goin in his garden off of it's exoticness, coolness, or cool colors
They also all know flower language!!!
Janus knew first but when Jan taught Virgil about it, he went NUTS over it
Jan taught Remus, but Virgil taught the light sides
After he learned they had gardens too, he went '!!!!!' and info dumped about flower language for a whole half hour before he realized what he was doing and stopped
The others urged him to keep going, and to visit their gardens someday and tell them some details on meaning
Now, most of them may be swayed by meaning when it comes to choosing whether or not they're keeping the flower, and they've even named some of them off the others
Remus, especially, could flip on a dime on a no or yes depending on a meaning and if it fits a friend well
Generally, though, they all chill out in each others' gardens a lot and talk abt their flowers!!
It's part of their daily routine
They all eat breakfast and then they leave to tend to their flowers
They have their own outside gardens, like. Connected to their rooms (with help from the twins, most likely) but they also keep some inside their rooms
Patton keeps cacti and little tiny flowers in little pots here and there. ("They're my little friends!!!!") They all have names, just the same as the others.
!!!!!! Also he totally goes into his tiney frog form sometimes after he waters his garden and chills in the moist soil, or even in the little plants around his room
Perfect place babey
Virgil has a few with calming scents scattered about. Maybe a few bright ones, just so they stand out
Logan...concept: bonsai. Why? Bonsai...cool. Also he can observe it's growth. It's fun ok
He also probably has a few he's doing experiments on and even maybe a few he just liked a lot yknow
Jan...probably just a few who's meanings he liked. A few pretty ones, a few calming ones. And…
One who's meaning reminded him of Remus, and one for Virgil.
After Virgil left, he set it on the dining room table.
It returned to its former spot on the counter when Janus was finally part of his family again.
Patton has a little plot he's set aside for the plants that remind him of the others.
Janus has a similar one. It used to be just Remus' and Virgil's; two lonely souls…
….but now it's filled with 3 more, neatly arranged.
Their family has grown so much.
Also Janus totally does the same thing Pat does but in his snake form. Like he just settles into the dirt and sunbathes.
Sometimes, one of them will come over to the other's place and they'll just chill in one of their gardens together. (Half the time, Patton is sitting on Janus' head, nestled under Janus' little snake hat as best he can, probably with his little frog nose sticking out.)
More than one of the sides have stumbled upon it. Every time, they just take a picture, gaze at them for a little while, maybe say hi, maybe not, and be on their way.
Roman probably plucks a rose every now and then and sets it in a vase. Not that often; just a while after the last one decays, and only one at a time.
He's nice to his rose bushes, ok? He swears to you.
He also totally has a few tiny, colorful ones here and there and some really nice smelling ones.
Just realized, he ABSOLUTELY has a honeysuckle plant. Same for Pat. That's like,,,,,,the Staple of excellent smells and pretty flowers AND childhood man
And...after he bonded again with his brother-or maybe even before-he planted one that reminded him of him…
But it's tucked away in his bedroom. Who knows if it even exists.
Remus just goes NUTS with whatever he wants inside his room, man. Cacti? Totally. Venus fly traps? Yeah, one or two. Colorful flowers that he just likes the looks of?? Hell yeah babey!!!
And...he himself has a flower of his own, tucked away upstairs…
...but he's had it for far, far longer.
(He may or may not have had to change what it was after bonding with Roman again, but hey, people change yknow?)
Also!! They all like poetry-writing AND reading
Janus likes it due to like...just. The pure elegance in the craft, I suppose. The way feelings, beliefs, and philosophies can be expressed.
It's all so interesting, how something so deep can be put into simple words.
His are usually elegant, with old-themed writing and deep metaphors, deep thoughts on philosophy and emotions that can only be expressed through odd metaphors and quiet words whispered by his pen.
Roman likes it for similar reasons; it's such an elegant way to express yourself, there are so many metaphors you can wind in there, and it feels so mystical, in a way...it's such a short little thing, but pure emotions can be injected straight into it.
He has so many. He...there's so much to feel, so much to write, so many ideas, all the time. But no matter what, they're full of metaphors, flowery language, the occasional serious one where he simply...pours every drop of sadness from his heart onto the paper.
He happily injects the emotions he doesn't want into those packed words, filled with so much.
He has his fair share of mystical ones, though, describing old beasts and monsters and songs and soulmates and love.
Virgil likes it due to the emotional outlet it can be, and the pure craftsmanship of it all. Just...the way some poets weave stories together...amazing.
His are often straight vents. Simple words, straight metaphors, lots of short lines and stanzas. Just...conveying things with the words straight from his head.
Remus likes it for the themes poems can carry. So dark, and maybe sad, and yet so simple; not gruesome, simply...heavy.
It's almost what he aspires for, in at least some aspects.
He also loves it for the dramatics of it all and the history, just as Roman does. Drop the love of the romance, though. However, he does adore how emotions can be conveyed.
His are just as mystical as Roman's can be sometimes, though his are often more about horrors lurking in the night, of course. He's prone to throwing extra emotions into his poems, as well, ones he doesn't know what to do with except throw overboard.
Logan likes it for the emotional outlet. For the explanation of emotions through metaphors, like puzzles for him to solve, to try and figure emotions out. And how much that can make him feel, so much packed into such a tiny package.
He has his own of those; small little poems that have...so much emotion poured into them, for when his cup runs over and the emotions he can't handle try to splash out on the ground and stain his carpet, stain the hearts of his friends and even his own.
He also enjoys the philosophy and even psychology in it all.
As mentioned, some of his are...simply filled to the brim with emotions he can't handle, straight vents. But as for style, he often writes with simple concepts, a lack of metaphors, big words that convey the same idea but are hard to understand with the common eye.
Patton likes it for similar reasons; there are so many emotions packed into poems, so many complex ideas he loves picking apart, so many metaphors that rely on emotion that he understands immediately.
He has his own fair share of vent poems. He has so many emotions that sometimes…he just. Needs somewhere to put them. He doesn't use big words, and uses a lot of winding explaining instead, but his metaphors and analogies are always flawless. He always knows what he means.
Sometimes they just sit around and talk about poems, poets they like, recommendations, how they managed to get into it, stuff like that. Double whammy, sometimes they chill in their gardens together and talk poetry or even integrate certain flowers or flower language into their poems.
Roman, Remus, and Patton go out when it rains and just...have fun. Sometimes Ro takes an umbrella and just twirls around a little bit, enjoys the atmosphere (as the feeling of it all is what he loves the most), but sometimes Remus manages to convince him to come play with them.
Remus just likes the rain cause it's fun to play in, yknow? Also, mud! And worms!! Worms!!! Worms are so cool, those wiggly little guys.
All Sides Confirmed, worms are cool, they have worms in their gardens and also worms are just generally cool dudes.
Pat likes it cause Frog, duh. Also it's fun to play in the rain, ALSO duh!!
Lo considers rain just. Smth that happens.
Virge likes the atmosphere of rain and likes the smell that's in the air afterwards, but doesn't like getting wet. Thunderstorms terrify him too.
Jan likes the Vibe of rain, same as Virge, and also likes the smell afterwards, but he likes to stay inside. Yknow, cuddle up with a nice cup of tea (or even hot chocolate, if he's feeling extra cozy) and a book and just listen to the pitter patter.
He doesn't exactly enjoy thunderstorms, but he's good at tuning them out. (And he's also excellent at calming Virgil down during one.)
So when a storm hits the mindscape (or however the hell it works) Pat and the twins will go outside and the others will stay holed up in the living room, drinking tea or hot chocolate and just Chillin.
Sometimes they even invite Thomas, just for fun. (And cause they mentioned it to him and he was affronted at them that he wasn't able to see Pat and the Twins just have fun in the rain.)
Sometimes, rarely, Pat and Ree will eventually convince Thomas to join them in their fun. (Ro or Ree can just magic him clean anyways.)
Catch the twins conjuring up feather pens whenever the hell they want to
Janus absolutely has a pet snake or two. They just sit and hiss at each other sometimes
Pat? Yeah, a couple frogs. He mostly keeps them in his garden, though; they're only really his pets in the sense that he feeds them and talks to them sometimes.
The twins probably share their theatrical strengths
Like,,,,,,Remus? If he's a villain or even slightly shitty as a person, he's got it. Plus a lot more complex characters
Roman? Can do dashing princes and kind characters excellently
Like...they just. Can't do some characters, because that's what the other can do. Y'know?
I don't know, maybe they aren't actually so...split down the middle? But I like the idea of that I guess
Sorry this got so long! I've been collecting these thoughts in a doc for a *while,* so it grew a lot. I can't add a read more either, since I'm on mobile...sorry.
#sanders sides#ts janus#ts virgil#ts remus#ts roman#ts patton#ts logan#character thomas#sanders sides headcanons#tss headcanons#creativitwins#kiiinda. just a bit. almost kinda sorta#trash talks#long post#sorry about that again#like i said though i cant do much about it#thomas sanders#that seems to be The general tag so its goin on
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Craig is my fave character so I'm making a list of all the things I love about him
his fandom wiki's both say he probably wears high waisted pants
When hes light enough to be carried around by the wind when Damien fucks shit up
He fights all the time but suddenly needs training when fighting tweek
That moment in fbw when he picks up stripe and hugs him I cry real tears
He's useless at math apparently (same)
The entire metro episode (and the fact he still has some of that stuff I think??)
When he had a crush on Thomas in that tourettes episode (you can't tell me that wasn't a crush cmon guys)
This bitch is so dumb but so smart my god
That time he cried when coming home from the breakup in tweek x Craig (my fugKIng baby,, also was he crying? It looked like it)
His ugly hat
The anal probe scene where he had brown hair?? Bitch does he dye it??
Literally a god meant to protect the earth from mutant guinea pigs
What even are the color of his eyes? Blue? Green? Both? Who knows!
He has special interests like red racer and space
This:
He smile! Babey!!
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Day 30: Recovery
(We'll bring you back to life.)
Whumptober 2019 Day 30: Recovery
Word Count: 5766
Relationships: D(LAMPR)/DR. PAL (platonic)
Warnings: Suicide attempt aftermath (it isn't really talked about much, but it is mentioned), not unsympathetic Patton but he is kind of an asshole in this and he sees the error of his ways (hopeful ending), Remus-typical disturbing/violent language, angry confrontation, mentions of a scar/violent altercation, mentions/implications of brainwashing, cursing
A/N: I AM SO SORRY FOR THE WAIT. i meant to get this out in time and then i had a really bad bit of writer's block and got super unmotivated, but... anyway, enough excuses! i really hope this makes up for the wait, if even a little bit. this is a direct sequel to day 1: shaky hands (bringing it full circle babey!!!!) and it is the longest one yet! pls enjoy hehe~
When Deceit wakes up, he realizes three things simultaneously. One, it’s fucking cold, so cold that he can’t feel his hands or feet. Two, his head feels like it was just run over by a truck, like his brain got melted into mush and now he can barely think properly. Three, he’s not dead. He knows he’s not dead, he’s not gone, because Logan is sitting in a chair across the room quietly reading a book. If Deceit had truly succeeded, Logan wouldn’t be here, and he wouldn’t have woken up at all.
Shit.
“Wh… What happened? Why’m I not gone?” Deceit asks hoarsely, words slurred and throat gravelly from disuse. Much of his existence has been defined by his innate ability to repulse people, to scare them and push them away, so it’s more than a shock for him when Logan glances up from his book and gives him a small smile. That warm look is always reserved for the others, the ones who actually deserve it, so seeing it directed towards himself steals the breath from his lungs.
“You’re awake, I see. Are you in any pain?” Logan asks as he strides over to stand in front of where Deceit is lying propped up on a stack of pillows. He raises his hand to check for a fever, the backs of his fingers a warm balm on cool skin. When he detects nothing unusual, Logan tucks a loose strand of hair behind Deceit’s ear, tilts his head and listens with rapt attention as Deceit describes his points of pain (throat, stomach, head). The care he’s being given is so unexpected, and surreal, and Deceit is almost desperate to keep receiving it. He doesn’t remember the last time he had any kind of affection directed towards him, the last time someone cared enough to ask if he was okay. It’s odd, yet addicting in a way.
“Why aren’t I… should’a died,” Deceit whispers as his brows pull in, an unmistakably sad look echoing in his distant eyes. It doesn’t feel like there’s much else to say when his legs curl up to meet his chin, when he gazes ruefully at the blankets in front of him, and yet Logan somehow knows how to quell even a little bit of the turbulence in Deceit’s mind. He just sighs and sits on the bed, adjusts his glasses, and clears his throat with restlessness barely hidden below a mask of indifference.
“Roman found you in the tub. We immediately got to work caring for you and attempting to keep you alive, however you fell into a coma, which is obviously irreversible when the injury is self-inflicted. You have been asleep for approximately three weeks, and it… has been, well. Chaotic, for lack of a better term. As you did not die, there was no replacement to act in your stead, but since you were not awake to properly facilitate your function, Thomas was unable to employ your trait at all. It caused a lot of havoc, you know,” Logan says softly, exhaustion clear in his face and voice. A gentle finger wraps around one of Deceit’s own, holding it in a gesture of comfort, a promise. “I’m… I apologize for not saying anything that day, for not stopping Patton. I should not have been so cowardly as to enable the casting away of such an important side.”
And though Logan’s voice is thick, his sentiment remains steady, a quiet regret laced in the atonement that’s just as heavy as the tears building in Deceit’s eyes. He never thought in a million years that Logan would ever apologize to him, that anyone would ever care enough about him to feel guilty. It tears through him like a whirlwind, switching back and forth between joy and grief so quickly it’s causing a migraine to poke tauntingly behind his eyes.
“Logan that’s… s’not your fault. You didn’t wanna get hurt, and that’s good. I’m glad you didn’t. I’m… ‘m self-preservation-- not just for me and Thomas, but for you sides 's well. You getting mistreated would be far more painful than anything I’ve had to endure,” Deceit mumbles, wet eyes shining as he finally raises his head to meet Logan’s sorrowful scrutiny. Logan swallows hard as he moves his fingers to thread through Deceit’s own, unusual tactility breathing in a space meant for rest. His posture is tense, a sure sign of discomforted remorse, and it takes all of Deceit’s effort not to reach forward and gather him in a protective hug.
“It’s not an excuse, though. I still shouldn’t have allowed them to push you out like that, should’ve tried harder to get them to understand how valuable and important you are to Thomas. Like you are to me,” Logan stresses, and Deceit’s breath catches in his throat. He… does he really care that much? He thinks Deceit is important even when Deceit doesn’t believe that himself? That he’s of value? That… that he isn’t worthless?
And Logan has never been one for brevity, has always been ready to go on tangents of information and explanations and reassurance. He always clarifies things, breaks them down to the true basics to expose them for what they really are. He teaches, and cultivates minds and knowledge, and he’s so incredibly fascinating to watch. His mind is mesmerizing, the way he forms his thoughts so clearly and concisely that it’s impossible to have things be lost in translation.
“You keep Thomas safe, Deceit. You are his verbal shield, of sorts, what gives him the ability to protect himself and others. You strive for him to better himself and to do things for himself. You allow him to treat himself kinder, let him live easier without so much stress and responsibility and exhaustion. Although I don’t agree with some of your viewpoints, you only want what’s best for Thomas and will fight for it despite everyone pushing back on you anyway. You’re the only one of us who is truly alone and yet you’re brave enough to face the scorn just so that you can do your best to help Thomas. I… I admire you, Deceit. You are much stronger than I could ever be. It’s why you can’t leave us. I know selfishness is in your nature, and wanting to disappear is understandable given the circumstances of your existence, but… Thomas can’t function properly without you. He’s almost lost three friends just this week, which would only be detrimental to his mental and emotional state. We need you to stay. I need you to stay.”
And, well, if an immeasurably vulnerable Deceit is only able to burst out into tears, bury his sobs in the fabric of Logan’s button-up shirt while they both rock soothingly back and forth, then maybe it was time to really, truly let go.
-
To Deceit’s surprise, the second person he sees after waking up is Virgil. Logan has apparently allowed Deceit to stay in his room throughout the duration of his slumber, but Deceit is seriously starting to miss his pet snake, Ethel, so he managed to convince Logan to let him switch to his own bedroom. It’s odd to walk after not moving at all for weeks, so leaning on Logan’s shoulder for support is crucial to making sure he doesn’t fall over and take a nose dive into the floor.
It’s in the hallway that they run into the anxious side, and where Deceit is sure he’s about to get yelled at or something. Although they had been close in childhood, once Virgil left them, his attitude flipped like a switch for no apparent reason. For a long time, Deceit wondered what he did, thought that Virgil’s hate was warranted, but now… although he still doesn’t truly believe he belongs with anyone, he’s done throwing a pity party for himself. He didn’t do anything wrong, has never done anything to purposely harm Virgil, and hell if he’s gonna let the other side's scalding remarks poke holes in his self-esteem.
“D… Deceit?” Virgil breathes when he sees them, stops in his tracks and hides further in his hood. Logan looks at Deceit questioningly, as if telling him that he will absolutely walk right past Virgil without a word if Deceit wanted him to, and it’s so reassuring that Deceit immediately feels a thousand times more ready to finally face this. “You’re actually awake.”
“Yeah. I am,” Deceit says, and then he realizes that he needs to say this now before he loses his courage again. A sigh escapes him as he rubs his eye tiredly, and Logan squeezes his waist comfortingly. “I’m not leaving, Virgil. I don’t know what your problem is with me, I don’t know why you hate me so much when we used to be best friends, and I don’t know what I did to you that was so awful that you have to fight with me every time I’m around. I don’t. But I’m tired of spending night after night crying to myself and wondering what I did wrong. I think… I think it’s time for me to ask what you did wrong, and I don’t know if I can really forgive you for the things you’ve said to me right now. But I’m here, and I’m staying for good, and you’re gonna have to learn to get over that because I’m seriously getting sick of feeling like I'm not good enough for you.”
Wow. That little rant made him feel the best he has felt in a long time. Although he’s pinching himself hard and using the pain as a way to be able to tell the full truth outside of their rooms, a certain clarity befalls him with each word. It’s immensely relieving to finally say the things he’s been wanting to tell Virgil for years, to finally let himself think that maybe it’s not his fault for once. And he can tell Logan is proud of him, judging by the way his eyes shine with respect despite his neutral expression.
Virgil looks miserable, and Deceit wants to feel bad, but he doesn’t. He doesn’t regret what he said a single bit, doesn’t wish to take back any of his words. The anxious side opens his mouth as if he’s going to say something, but aborts the action at the last second, instead going to stare at the floor while he chews on his lip. His silence means a lot more than Virgil himself likely realizes, meanings and intentions and unnamed thoughts spilling out in the space between them, and Deceit nudges Logan so that they can walk around him and into Deceit’s own bedroom.
They have a long way to go, but Deceit can already feel the tiniest bit of hope shining inside him.
-
A lot has changed in the four months since Deceit’s attempt. For one, Thomas has allowed him a more permanent spot in the group, after a particularly heated argument with Logan than ended with the three of them finally coming to a mutual understanding with one another. Secondly, Virgil is talking to him again. Not the passive-aggressive banter, not the scathing insults, not the glares and hostility that Deceit is so used to. Now, he’s really trying to actually talk to him, will speak about something that happened in the news with him at the dinner table or show him memes when they’re both chilling in the mindscape living room. There’s so much more there, so much more respect and care, and Deceit has a feeling that they might even be friends again sometime soon.
Thirdly, Deceit has barely seen and hasn't talked to Patton outside of filming videos.
Although Deceit doesn’t particularly want to speak with Patton, listen to him say that "he's a bad influence, Thomas is a good person, you can't be here", it’s still odd that he’s somehow able to never be in the room when Deceit enters. When he does catch him off guard, the older side only gives him an unreadable look and makes his exit as quickly and inconspicuously as possible, typically taking advantage of the twins’ commotion to slip out undetected. Deceit notices, because of course he does, and to his own surprise, it doesn’t bother him as much as he expects. He’ll just wait for Patton to come to him, whenever he’s finally ready to admit his faults and apologize, so there’s no point in fretting over it.
However, Deceit does need to talk with the twins, Roman more so than Remus, and it’s this need that leaves him standing outside Roman’s door at one in the morning, a fist raised to knock. It’s not like he has to worry about Roman being asleep, because he’s always awake into the late hours of the night, frantically coming up with new ideas just to veto them all anyway. His process is almost manic, completely self-destructive, and it garners a lot of sympathy from a part of himself that can sorely relate.
The three swift raps on the door evoke a surprised squawk from within the bedroom, and multiple loud thumps can be heard before the heavily decorated door swings open. Deceit just stands there with a judgemental expression, lightheartedly raising an eyebrow in amusement at the sight of the creative side. He’s covered head-to-toe in glitter, multiple colours sparkling when the plastic reflects the dim light coming from the hall. He looks ridiculous, with the flakes in his hair and eyelashes and clothing, but he manages to look confident even despite that. It’s fake, Deceit knows it’s fake, but he humours him anyway.
“What’re you doing in there?” Deceit asks, a sly smirk playing on his lips, and Roman has the humility for an embarrassed blush to spread across his cheeks. He fidgets with the bottom of his coat even as he puts on a brave face, and Deceit can see through him so easily. Maybe it has to do with his purpose, the fact that the very arrogance the princely side portrays is a lie in itself, or maybe it’s because Roman is just that transparent.
“Just-- Just creating art! None of your business! Why’re… why are you here?” Roman asks, initial loudness tapering off to reveal uncertainty and vulnerability, and it’s a wonder the others haven’t figured this out sooner. Roman is so painfully obvious in his insecurity, shows how much he truly doubts himself and his work like a flashing neon sign above his head.
“I wanted to talk. Come to an understanding, if you will,” Deceit hums, adjusts his trusty bowler hat on his head casually despite it actually being a nervous tic. He doesn’t actually know what Roman is going to say, doesn’t know if he’s going to fall back on yelling and accusations and swing out his sword just like he did before. Will Deceit be left with a scar this time, too? Will he gain another streak of raised white, another lightning bolt stretching across the expanse of his skin, marring the smooth surface just like last time?
“Oh. Uh, um. Come in, then, I-I guess,” Roman stutters, picks at a flake of shimmering chipped nail polish as he steps to the side. His room is just as much of a mess as Deceit expects if not more, but the vexation he feels as he scans the aftermath of a creative tornado is just as acute. Stacks of parchment paper are piled in high towers around the room, looming overhead like a thundercloud of loathing. Pens and pencils and fabric and threads are strewn about, placed in such an intrinsically accurate way that it feels like the chaos is almost organized. It’s meticulous in its frenzy, a passionate craze that seems to be woven into so much of how the other side functions.
“I came to ask you for a favour. I ask you to not whip out your katana at me any time we are in the vicinity of one another. We wouldn’t want a repeat of last time, no?” Deceit asks, smooth and suave and uninterested on the surface. Of course, underneath he isn’t faring as well, but Roman doesn’t need to know that. Deceit is just waiting for Roman’s congeniality to flip on its head like a switch, for the civil nature of their interaction to turn sour when he decides he’s done listening to him. He’s expecting for Roman to yell, or maybe even for a fist to come his way, and he’ll have to start back at square one again. That’s just how Roman is. Fiercely protective, headstrong even when that same stubbornness and fire causes him to stumble, to put his attention in the wrong place.
But he doesn’t. Roman doesn’t get angry, in fact, he gets quite a sad look in his eyes at Deceit’s words. The way his gaze probes far into Deceit’s own, pulls him apart and examines his intentions and thoughts and feelings, it all leaves him feeling incredibly vulnerable. And he is uncomfortable when against all odds, Roman just darts forward to pull Deceit into his arms, smushes his half-scaled face into a broader chest with a passion that has never, ever been for him.
“But of course, small snake! A true prince would never brandish his blade at anyone other than a foe, and you, my Daring Deception, are far from it,” Roman tells him with a full tone and bright eyes, and the way he looks down at Deceit with such compassion and care to completely contradict his usual regards leaves Deceit’s head spinning. The snake-like side looks up at Roman from where he’s snuggled into his chest, gives him wide eyes and a look of surprise that he forgets to mask, and Roman’s smile is so much more gentle than Deceit thought he had the capacity for. “You are a friend. You’re a brave, shining knight to protect Thomas, just like me! If you ask me, I think we’d make a pretty good team.”
The endeared grin Deceit gives him in return surprises both of them equally.
-
Deceit doesn’t expect much to happen when he rises up in Remus’ room. The place is just as messy as always, just as chaotic as Roman’s is but in a different way. While Roman can make sense of the chaos, search through the whirlwind with such accuracy as if rifling through a file cabinet, Remus simply takes a sniff and hopes for the best. He doesn’t bother with organization of any kind, doesn’t bother with making things easier on himself, and Deceit supposes that very tendency can account for a lot of the behaviour Remus has portrayed in the past.
“Double Dee! What’cha doin’ here? Wanna try the sandwich I made? It has strawberries and eel meat and tartar sauce! Here, have a bite!” Remus demands excitedly, childishly, and despite the disgust Deceit feels while looking at the absolutely abominable excuse of edible food squished between Remus’ fingers, he only shakes his head neutrally. He just needs to get this over with, make sure everything is okay between them.
“I’ve already eaten today, Remus. Maybe next time. Actually, I wanted to ask you something,” Deceit dismisses, waves a gloved hand as he clears away some garbage for a spot to sit on Remus’ bed. The owner of said bed perks up from where he sits cross-legged on the floor, a rigidly-postured Remus surrounded by a circle of discarded candy wrappers. Deceit only hopes Remus actually ate them, and didn’t do something stupid, like glue them to his legs or see how many he could shove up his nose. “Do you… do you hate me?”
“What? ‘f course not! You’re fun, Dee-Dee! Almost as fun as when rollercoasters go flying off their tracks and smash into a building and go up in flames with the screaming passengers still inside! Hey, what did dying feel like?” Remus answers, jumping and shifting from one topic to another so fast it’s giving Deceit whiplash. He doesn’t like to linger on a particular topic for very long with the exception of him being the one to bring it up, unless it’s immediately or inherently shunned by someone else for existing. That only adds fuel to the fire, gives Remus a reason to keep perpetuating the idea, because the more Thomas doesn’t want to think about something, the more he’s guaranteed to toil under it. “You wanted to die, right? Otherwise you wouldn’t’a ate all those pills. ‘cept I already know that we can actually die ‘n’ be replaced, since that’s what happened with our ol’e pal Lust. And the new one got thrown in the subconscious a week later, so. Are y’a wantin’ to leave? Wanna… wanna leave me behind?”
And Deceit doesn’t really know what to say to that. They didn’t talk much when they were still living together in the “dark” part of the mindscape, not even when they were three instead of two. They’ve never been particularly close, and yet Remus sounds genuinely upset at the notion of Deceit leaving for good. His impact must be much larger than he’s thought all this time, to cause such hurt and betrayal in someone he was sure was indifferent to his presence.
“Of course not, Remus. It was a mistake, and I won’t make it again. I’m staying, this time, and I’m not gonna leave you alone,” Deceit consoles, reassures despite the fact that Remus isn’t outwardly upset. He doesn’t cry, he doesn’t lash out, he doesn’t scream or shout or yell. He simply sits there, stares with his wistful, bitter brown eyes, and it makes him simultaneously all too easy to read and yet incredibly difficult.
“Oh. Well, good! That means I can make y’a more sandwiches! Chef’s special!” They’re sure to be disgusting. But maybe Deceit can pretend to like it just to see delight burst to life on Remus’ face.
-
Confronting Patton is the scariest thing Deceit has ever had to do in his entire existence as a side.
Despite what Logan said the day he woke up, Deceit is a coward. It’s a direct result of his purpose; after all, what kind of self-preservation would run straight into danger with no regard to what might happen after? His caution is certainly warranted, given the situation, but it doesn’t necessarily mean that it isn’t still difficult. It’s hard to be so distrusting of someone who’s supposed to be a helper, someone who’s supposed to be Thomas’ morality. And Thomas is a good person, at times dangerously so, which makes Patton’s actions that day so many years ago so confusing.
Despite how part of him rings a pulsing red alarm when he’s even within a twenty-foot radius around the patriarchal side, there’s an even bigger part that’s yelling at him to hurry up and instigate an apology already, because this is getting annoying. He just wanted to wait, to let Patton come up with the correct conclusion on his own, because how else will he truly learn? But Deceit can’t even be in the same room with him without the other side scampering away at the first opportunity, and he’s tired of playing these cat-and-mouse games. The worst part is, he doesn’t even know if he’s the cat or the mouse.
Having already made amends with all of the others, Deceit decides it’s time to stop putting this off. If Patton won’t suck it up and apologize, or if he really is just that oblivious to the point of all of this, then fine. He can be like that. Deceit will just come to him. And so he does, manages to sneak up on him while he’s in the kitchen, humming as he makes himself a salad. It’s late, so everyone else is either asleep or pretending to be, and it creates a space where Deceit can do this on his own. Although he’s embarrassed, Deceit isn’t too proud to admit that he is a little afraid, that he can see Patton turning on him and hurting him as a vivid mental image playing in a loop. He just hopes this doesn’t go that way.
“Patton,” Deceit says stoically, not exactly a greeting, but more of an accusation. Patton lets out a little shocked yelp and whips around, butter knife out as if he’s going to actually use it. Deceit may be scared, but apparently Patton is too, and he has no right to be. Before Patton can sink out and run away just like every other time, Deceit grabs his shoulder, gently but assertively pushing him down into the kitchen chair scooted away from the table.
Patton looks up at him with terrified eyes and an almost nauseous expression, and it takes a lot of personal control for Deceit to not be offended. Who is he to be afraid of Deceit? What has Deceit done to hurt and scare him so badly? What gives him the right to be so frightened, the nerve to seem petrified of this encounter after how he treated Deceit? Anger boils up in Deceit’s throat listlessly, a nebulous animosity that yearns to explode. It only builds when Patton cowers under the snake-like side’s unimpressed stare.
“We need to talk. No more of your running away,” Deceit demands, stern and obstinate, but he’s sure his firm demeanour appears much more inexorable to the fatherly side. Although Deceit really is trying his best to not be antagonistic, his ire is only fueling his volatility, leaving his self-restraint put through the wringer in the face of his almost overwhelming sense of betrayal. What took place that day should never have happened, the events seemingly a direct antithesis to Patton’s usual intentions and motivations as Morality, but it did, and he can’t go any longer trying to escape responsibility and repercussions while Deceit shoulders all of the stress it caused.
“W--W-What do you wanna t-talk about, kiddo?” Patton stutters, stumbles around a feigned ignorance as his eyes dart between everything but Deceit’s own steely gaze. His fingers tremble as he fidgets with them, attempts a distraction from the confrontation, and it’s so unfair that Deceit almost wants to turn and kick the side of the counter in an angry outburst. He doesn’t, of course, because he’s not that brazenly juvenile, but he sure does wish he could.
“I’m not your kiddo, not after what you did to me. Don’t you dare call me that,” Deceit hisses as he slams a hand down on the table right beside where Patton is leaning. The latter of the two flinches, jumps with a tiny scared squeal dying in his throat before it can even be released into the silence left after Deceit’s outburst. He swallows hard as tears prick at his eyes, shine in the dim light of the kitchen, and Deceit feels no sympathy at all.
“P-Please don’t hurt me!” Patton rushes out as he curls in further on himself, tries to make the space his body takes up as compact as possible. Deceit scoffs, pulling back to stand up straight once more. He may be the shortest out of all of the sides, but his dominant, authoritative fury lets him loom just as well. There’s really no point in drawing this out any more than it needs to be, and although Deceit certainly would take an immense satisfaction in seeing Patton squirm, he needs to be the bigger person here.
“Hurt you? What, like you hurt me?” Deceit’s words are simple, biting, but they accomplish their intended effect all the same, maybe even more so. Patton shrinks back as if he’s been slapped, and he kind of has, at least metaphorically. The only way he will truly understand the nature of his actions is by being blunt and upfront about it; no sugarcoating, no dancing around the subject, no room to make excuses or twist the imperative words. Guilt is a powerful thing, and when utilized correctly, it can be the one thing that truly shifts the interpersonal tide.
“I-- I… I’m sorry!” Patton blurts out, uncertain under Deceit’s withering glare. His admission feels fake, hollow, empty. It echoes in the room for a round, allows Deceit a moment to quell the curses that well up in his throat and dance on his silver tongue. “I didn’t mean to--”
“Yes you did, don’t lie to me,” Deceit spits, interrupting the fake reassurance and stopping it in its tracks before it can become bigger than it deserves to be. Patton’s mouth snaps shut as he looks down at his lap, arms slowly shifting to curl around himself in a mockery of an embrace. Fine. Let him garner all the comfort he can get, because he sure won’t be comfortable when Deceit is done.
“You made me think I was safe, that I had a family. I had existed in the mindscape for a total of two hours before you threw me out for something I couldn’t even control. And I’m half-snake, you know that-- did you know that snakes are cold-blooded?” Deceit asks, and he laughs humourlessly when he sees a dawning realization that turns into horror on Patton’s face. “I almost died out there. When Virgil found me, he had to literally bring me back to life moments before I would have fully faded away. Do you know how much that fucking scared him?
“You turned everyone who I ever thought could have been a friend against me. Roman was so happy to finally have someone to go on adventures with, and the next time I saw him, he hated me. I wonder why, hm? Did you know that after he switched his sword from plastic to metal, after you made him believe that I’m the evil villain he needs to slay, he tried to do exactly that? I still have the scar,” Deceit says bitterly as he lifts his hand up. He ignores Patton’s flinch in favour of pushing aside the fabric of his capelet and shirt, showing the paternal side the raised white line that jaggedly falls from the top of his shoulder to about halfway down his arm. A whimper spills from Patton’s lips, desperate and ashamed, and Deceit really hopes he’s finally starting to get it.
“Not to mention what you did to Logan. He was so fucking terrified to speak up about what you did to me that he stayed silent, went directly against his purpose as a side just to make sure that he wouldn’t be thrown out and ostracized too. Do you know how much that hurts me, as self-preservation? What’s even worse is that I’m glad he stayed quiet and kept himself safe, because who knows what could have happened if he dared to go against Morality.”
With the words shot from Deceit’s mouth like a bullet from a revolver, tears finally breach Patton’s lashes, roll over his cheekbones and fall in droplets onto his pants. His shoulders shudder under the weight of silent sobs, and even as Patton’s lips twist as he tries not to cry audibly, he still keeps his head held up while he listens. The action is peculiar, and Deceit knows what he’s trying to convey, but atonement is much more than just that. It’s a start, but there’s certainly a long way to go.
“Virgil was my best friend, you know. I cared about him so fucking much, and he was the only one who truly had my back when I was still recovering from what you did. But even he wanted to have a taste of acceptance, and it wasn’t a surprise in the slightest when he suddenly hated me the next time we were able to talk. Your brainwashing knows no limits, truly,” Deceit sneers, contempt in his eyes and pain in his heart. He doesn’t want to open up. He doesn’t want to be honest like this, doesn’t want to pinch himself until he’s numb just so he can focus long enough to finally show Patton the truth about what he’s done. He doesn’t want to, but he has to, because he’ll just regret it if he doesn’t.
“I wasn’t really ever close friends with Remus, but that doesn’t matter because Remus shouldn’t even exist. In fact, neither should Roman. You split Creativity apart, forced them apart based on your arbitrary set of rules for Thomas to abide by, and shoved him into a harmful, narrow mindset. And if that wasn’t enough, you couldn’t even let them properly be brothers and grow up together as siblings, like they should have. No, you shoved Remus out just like me, and it caused him to hole himself up in his room for nearly twenty years just so he could use his part of the Imagination to make a world where he wasn’t separated from his literal other half. He likes to act like he doesn’t care, but I know he does, and he shouldn’t fucking have to.
“You’ve only brought suffering upon me, and Remus, and Virgil at one point. To those who needed you the most, you scorned and demonized, and left us with no guidance or warmth simply because you don’t like our purpose. But we are all sides of Thomas, just as much as you are, and whether you like it or not, we are important and needed. I’m done trying to convince myself to be the villain, to play into your fantasy and the knowledge that I’d never get accepted or be listened to. I deserve so much more than you’re giving me, and I’m never going to make the mistake of inherently trusting you again. This time, you have to earn it.”
“I’m so sorry, Deceit,” Patton whispers, slow and thick and watery at the same time, and the soft, quiet words cause Deceit to completely deflate. He’s so tired, so fucking exhausted, and he knows that it’s going to be this way for a long time.
And maybe it’s too much. Maybe it’ll take too long, or maybe it’ll never happen. Maybe they’ll never truly fix this, mend and repair the cracks driven between them as a result of how Deceit grew up. Maybe Deceit will never work up the courage to forgive Patton, to be able to look at him without fear and anger leaping up into his throat. But none of that matters, not really, because Deceit finally has people who care about him, people who will stand up for him and support him when he can’t do it himself. And for now, maybe that’s all he really needs.
#whumptober2019#no.30#recovery#ts sides#sanders sides#ts deceit#deceit sanders#deceit angst#ts logan#logan sanders#ts roman#roman sanders#ts remus#remus sanders#ts virgil#virgil sanders#dr. pal#ts patton#patton sanders#dlampr#tw suicide attempt mentions#tw cursing#tw brainwashing#ask to tag#jasper's writing
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i was tagged by @billhaders thanks dude!
rules: pick 5 shows, then answer the following questions! don’t look at them, and don’t cheat. then tag some people.
star trek (tos)
torchwood
hannibal
andy griffith show
nip/tuck
who is your favorite character in 2? — oh shit, uh, owen probably
who is your least favorite character in 1? — how bout that entire nazi planet
what is your favorite episode of 4? — i’ve only seen a handful so far but i really liked “manhunt” it was fucking hilarious
what is your favorite season of 5? — oh season 2 for sure
who is your favorite couple in 3? — will/hannibal for sure
what is your favorite episode of 1? — OOF CITY ON THE EDGE OF FOREVER ALWAYS BABEY
what is your favorite episode of 5? — damn that’s hard. i still love the season finale of season 2 it always gets me
what is your favorite season of 2? — honestly probably s1
how long have you watched 1? — since i was in my single digits :)
how did you become interested in 3? — big fan of the thomas harris books
who is your favorite actor in 4? — don knots <3
which do you prefer: 1, 2, or 5? — damn this question, but star trek is my favorite show of all time so star trek
which show have you seen more episodes of: 1 or 3? — definitely star trek but i have rewatched hannibal a couple times
if you could be anyone from 4, who would it be? — opie! he looks like he had a fun time growing up in mayberry
would a crossover between 3 and 4 work? — NO GOD NO. DON’T LET THE CANNIBALS INTO MAYBERRY LMAOAOAOAO
pair two characters in 1 who would make an unlikely but strangely okay couple? — i always thought uhura and mccoy could be cute in some alternate universe
overall, which show has the best storyline: 3 or 5? — as much as i love nip/tuck, that shit is all over the place ryan murphy-style and hannibal just has the PERFECT storyline so hannibal
which has better theme music: 2 or 4? — as much as the andy griffith tune gets into my head torchwood has some of the most emotional tracks i’ve ever heard
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tagging mutuals or just anyone i know who might wanna do this!
@teesbees / @arunima-t / @harry-lloyds / @iamdinomartins / @apprenticemockingbird / @colorofmymindposts / @mikestoklassa / @lightningfastj :D Have fun!
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