#some things might change over time
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mira !!! :]
#isat#in stars and time#isat mirabelle#isat spoilers#<- due to act 3 optional content !#the img might be being chewed due to weird canvas size oops ah well#one of these miras is not like the other#one of these miras doesnt belong ASFASFSDAFA#a majority of these are based on things mentioned / that happen in the house cuz i thought itd be fun to draw :D#so like the wilting plant is from gardening room dialogue#the poster with ppl holding hands and sparkly eyes is (i think??) from some SAPSAPSAAP dialogue in one of the first rooms#i tried looking around ISAT to see if it's also in there too but couldnt find it so uh correct me if im wrong if thats NOT an exclusive LOL#side note the 2 in the poster are some old nuz ocs isatified ASDFASFA#funnily enough tho they are from 2 different games if they actually ever met they would hate each others guts i think. hmm...#however both are also the most qualified to help with promotional stuff so theres that ASDFAFA#mira looking at her bonding proposals is sorta on the tin but#the fact that she has like right next to her while she sleeps in her dresser makes me :(#cuz to me it potrays how much theyve been weighing over her cuz of how close shes been keeping them with her vs putting them on a bookshelf#or something idk if that makes sense i dont have proper words atm#but uhhh moving on chalkboard is from one of the optional events#which i think is! important!!! i dont think ive seen many ppl talk about it but!! yeah!#however i too do not have words on it atm but!!! yeah!!!! moving on for now!#the 'mira' that is really just the change god is ofc from the change god event :]#aaand ofc the iconic finish from mira towards the king#and then some misc miras with swords for funsies tbh ASFAFA#but yeah! i like mira a lot actually but as with many things i do not currently have many words to properly articulate *why*#all i know in my heart of hearts is that she is near and dear and special to me personally#one day. one day i will be able to gather my thoughts in a cohesive manner but that day. is not today!#anyway tag talk over :]
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you say machete has to be closeted then why's he always wearing them little heels
Maybe he thinks he's a tiny bit nicer looking in them.
#no in fact he's just a little ahead of the curve let me try to explain#again I'm not a historian I'm just sharing what I've read I might be misremembering stuff so don't quote me on this#high heels became extremely fashionable in the early 1600's probably just a few decades after Machete's time#and they were originally worn by men#because they were inspired by Persian riding boots#if your shoes had heels you'd have easier time keeping your feet in the stirrups (think of cowboy boots)#Europeans saw them thought they looked snazzy and they became wildly popular in noble circles fairly quickly#for some hundred years or so high heels were the epitome of class wealth power and status and they were essentially genderless#remember that concepts of masculinity and femininity are fluid and change over time#things that were seen as manly a few centuries ago may seem downright effeminate to a modern viewer#it's all matter of perspective neither is objectively more correct than the other#they started to separate into men's heels and women's heels around mid 1700's iirc but the changes weren't massive even then#and only truly went out of vogue when the French Revolution hit in 1789#and people all across the continent were suddenly put off by everything that reminded them#of the frivolousness and extravagance of royalty and aristicracy#so in his canon timeline I don't think people are looking at him and going “hmmm that's pretty gay”#because heels hadn't become gendered yet#maybe he likes how they accentuate his already tiny paws and make his legs look even longer than they are#he's interested in fashion or at least likes to dress nicely in high quality garments#he tries very hard to look his best despite never really feeling comfortable in his skin#he was a real shrimp as a kid and even though he eventually grew up to be a beanpole he might still find the extra height appealing#no one's going to look down on him ever again#I admit the way I draw them is a lot more modern than the true historical style at the time but not outrageously so#artistic freedom and all that in the end I'm not aiming for 100% accuracy#modern au Machete has no excuses though he's just a little bit fruity#if the guy feels empowered by wearing little clip cloppers let him#answered#anonymous#Machete
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Got requested to expand on that Swap/Angel Jonah AU, so I gave it a try
#too many AUs at this point lol#but someone specif wanted to see this one so I figured I'd give it a try#might change some things over time but for now Im happy#Angel Hare#angel gabby#jonah whitman#Angel Hare Swap AU#Angel Jonah
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This may be a prickly subject, and I'm sorry if so. But I'm trying to learn more about Elvis, and every time I bring him up to people I know, they try to tell me he was this terrible person, and point me toward Priscilla's book, the movie made on it, and the discourse. Idk if you've talked about it on here (I tried searching your blog but couldn't find anything on it). If you're willing, I'd love to hear your take on it so I can see a more nuanced view.
The film Priscilla was greenlit roughly a month after Priscilla herself was informed that she was close to becoming financially insolvent in 2022. With a business partner, Brigitte Kruse, who allegedly helped broker the film deal, she established a limited liability company called Priscilla Presley Partners that was supposed to use her image and likeness to create several lines of merchandise to coincide with the film's release. That business partner is now suing Priscilla because she did not have the rights to her image or likeness, or any ability to use the Presley name, because she had already sold all of those rights and was no longer considered in good standing with Graceland or Elvis Presley Enterprises. The entire business deal, then, according to the lawsuit, was built on her misrepresentation of how much her image was worth.
The deal between the two of them fell apart after Riley Keough, Lisa Marie's daughter and Priscilla's granddaughter, settled with Priscilla to give her a lump sum of $1 million from Lisa Marie's estate and yearly amounts of $100,000. Priscilla sued very shortly after Lisa Marie's death because she thought Lisa Marie's signature on a will had been forged because Priscilla was not included in it. All of the assets were supposed to go directly to Lisa Marie's son, Benjamin Keough, who died in 2020, and her three daughters, two of whom are still teenagers. Now, part of those assets have been claimed by Priscilla and her other son, Navarone, who has no connection to the Presley family and has stated he is glad Lisa died.
Four months before Lisa's death, Lisa wrote to Sofia Coppola and made it clear she had strong concerns about the Priscilla film and was suspicious of the intentions behind it:
"As his daughter, I don’t read this and see any of my father in this character. I don’t read this and see my mother’s perspective of my father. ... I will be forced to be in a position where I will have to openly say how I feel about the film and go against you, my mother and this film publicly."
Lisa was enormously grateful for efforts put into 2022's Elvis to find her father's soul and to restore his dignity in a world that often turns him and his family into a joke:
"You can feel and witness Baz’s pure love, care, and respect for my father throughout this beautiful film, and it is finally something that myself and my children and their children can be proud of forever."
It is such a strong and powerful statement, to see how much Lisa valued family, not just her father but her own children and their legacy, and how willing she was to speak up no matter what was going on in her personal life to say what was right. On this and many other things, Lisa and Priscilla's values have rarely been in alignment. A friend and EPE business associate, Joel Weinshanker, said of her, "Lisa couldn't be bought, she couldn't be pushed. If she felt that something wasn't in Elvis' best interest, it was never about money. And she really is the only Presley that you could say that about."
Priscilla, though, has adjusted her stories about her time with Elvis almost every time she discusses it. For a quick example, she said in her book, which was released in 1985, that Elvis insisted she do her hair and makeup a certain way, that he had control over her look and would get upset if she didn't dress how he wanted. But in an interview with Ladies' Home Journal in 1973, she said that she made a deliberate choice to attend makeup school so that she could learn how to style herself, and that it was her idea to wear big, black hair and big, black eyeliner. She said she was embarrassed for going overboard. She said, "I wish that Elvis had said something, but he must have liked it because he never commented." This lines up with recollections from Patti Parry, a platonic friend of Elvis' and a hairstylist, who said Priscilla always wanted Patti to do her hair in a "big boombah," but that Priscilla would then get upset when Elvis didn't notice or didn't like it.
These changes are impossible not to notice if you follow her for any length of time. At the film premiere, she said it felt just like watching her life and said she was consulted on everything, since she was an executive producer. After the film came out, she said she couldn't understand why Coppola had changed so much about the story and misrepresented events. In the '70s, she said she and Elvis lived almost totally separate lives, that she came and went as she pleased, and that she loved this freedom. Later, she said she felt completely stifled and trapped and never left the house, even though she had friends she went out with all the time. In 2019, she tweeted a forceful denial about a National Enquirer story: "This is the Enquirer folks... please don't believe everything you read. ... Never planned on being buried next to Elvis. What will they come up with next?" But part of her settlement demands in her lawsuit against Riley in 2023 asked "to be buried next to Elvis." This year, she said in two separate interviews that Lisa was with her when Elvis died and that Priscilla had to break the news to her, despite the fact that Lisa was at Graceland when it happened. She has said she gave Elvis the idea to wear belts on his jumpsuits, to have a lightning bolt as his logo, to sing "An American Trilogy," though none of that is true. She retells the story about forcing Elvis to burn all of his spiritual books to prove he loved her as an almost funny anecdote about debrainwashing him, while Elvis later said it was the worst thing he ever agreed to, a desperate attempt to make her happy by giving up the things he valued the most. (For the record, this is my opinion about their relationship on both sides: thinking they could change themselves and each other to make it work. It never did.)
Every secondhand Elvis account has to be treated lightly and only valued for its consistency with known facts and other witnesses. I try to give enormous benefit of the doubt to anyone in the Elvis world because they often only have partial knowledge of what Elvis may have been thinking at any given time, and there are numerous examples of people who were taken advantage of by unscrupulous journalists who changed the story they wanted to tell. But Priscilla's stories sometimes are not even consistent with her own statements, which makes them very poor options indeed to base anything on. However careful we are about noting potential biases and inaccuracies in other memoirs, we have to be triply, quadruply careful with anything in which Priscilla involves herself because she has a vested interest in generating discourse today in order to make money. Unfortunately, Priscilla has a habit of stifling other accounts or making sensationalized statements each time there is a possibility that she will lose some of the cachet that comes with being an Elvis Source—after Elvis' death, when she believed she was going to inherit his airplane and disinvited everyone that Vernon said could fly in it to his funeral; when she sued the parents of one of Elvis' ex-girlfriends after he died because he had allowed them to live rent-free in a house he bought for them; when she claimed that Elvis wanted to reunite with her before his death, despite the fact that he was engaged to someone else and told many people he couldn't see a reunion ever happening with her; before Vernon's death, when she convinced him to make her an executor of the Presley estate until Lisa came of age; after Lisa came of age, when she convinced Lisa to let her stay on as partner; when Lisa accused Priscilla of misspending Lisa's money, during which time anonymous sources cropped up to say Lisa was in debt and drug-addled; when Priscilla was removed from her position as an EPE spokesperson but kept collecting $900,000 a year from the company; when Lisa died, and Priscilla sued once she learned she wasn't in the will; when Priscilla was no longer associated with EPE and decided to do another adaptation of a book that she has since recanted parts of and has contradicted before and after its release.
When Priscilla thinks there is a threat to her image and position, she does new interviews and projects to muddy the waters and stir public interest, whether it is true or false, positive or negative, laudatory or defamatory. She gets corrected by Elvis' surviving family members, girlfriends, friends, and fans, but these stories do not get the same reach no matter how much they are backed by contemporaneous documents and witnesses, or how many resources there are to educate the public on how Elvis' and Priscilla's attitudes about marriage and relationships changed—along with the rest of society—between 1960 and 1970.
I think almost any single-source project is not going to advance our understanding of Elvis in any way because no one individual can speak for him, and we are kind of obligated to include all the context we can in order to appreciate his character, his successes and failures, flaws and virtues—and to treat both himself and those around him as fully three-dimensional people who have their own blind spots. Priscilla is far too aware of her own image, and far too willing to change it to suit the audience, to be particularly valuable here.
She is next scheduled to appear at the Lexington (Kentucky) Comic & Toy Con.
#please know that for each of these stories i have tried to see things from her perspective#and then something happens again#and again and again#so i have simply stopped trying and accepted that i don't like her or find her credible as far as these things go#i don't imagine i should be privy to all their family drama so of course some of this may change over time#but there are far far far better sources for learning about elvis!#an easy gateway would be ashley's adventures and elvis fans matter on youtube!#ashley does a lot of fun documentation of graceland and efm is the family channel of billy and jo smith#they are elvis' cousin and his wife who were with elvis a lot and they have good human stories#same caveat goes for them: they might not know everything#but i just like the format better than books
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Hey so I’ve mentioned this a lot of times on my main blog, but I wanted to put this out over here since it is Hallow’s Eve. I always give out little tchotchkes on Halloween along with candy. This year, I’ve completely switched over to 100% doohickeys and doodads— think mechanical pencils, shaped erasers, little notebooks, squishes, vampire teeth and spiders rings and all. It started years ago in college when I signed up for a dorm Halloween event where kids from an area that was too dangerous to really trick or treat through got bussed in to trick or treat at our dorm. I bought some candy and dollar store Halloween themed stuff with what i had. And you know what the kids went ape shit over?
Motherfucking. Mechanical. PENCILS!!
These kids could not get enough of them. They literally went “PENCILS??!” I had never seen kids get so hyped up for pencils lmao. They were the first things to go. Candy is fleeting; the little pencils you can bring to school to flex are eternal, until you inevitably lose one of the refill parts and then they aren’t but listen, in that one moment they are infinite. And its nice thinking that maybe some kids who don’t always have access to school supplies not only get them, but get them in fun shapes and designs.
Anyway. I recommend people to give out fun stuff like this not just because kids seem to genuinely enjoy them, but also because there’s this thing called the Teal Pumpkin Project here in America. You can put out a teal pumpkin to show that you are giving away non-candy items and sign your address up so parents of children with allergies know that there are houses their kids can safely and happily trick or treat at! It’s a win-win! Plus, if you accidentally bought too much, it’s not like candy— just pack it away, pencils and fidget spinners will be good next year, too! :)
#its such an easy and fun thing to do#and it helps make Halloween accessible for some kids who might otherwise not be able to participate#i always think about stuff like that#my step-grandparents had a ramp built at their house for them#but one great unintended side effect is that they always got a lot of children in wheelchairs to their house on Halloween#who were so so excited they could go up to the door and ring the bell for once :’)#so like i always try to think of ways to maybe include people who might have trouble otherwise when i can!#and this is such a little but easy to do change#i like to source my stuff from the dollar store targets dollar area and amazon#i bet party supply stores (think party favor bag stuff) would work great too#so. if you have time tomorrow maybe run on over to the dollar store during your lunch hour#grab some random little things. kids will go crazy. maybe you’ll brighten someone’s day
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“We belong to the Earth and the sea, you belong to the stars.”
— Zhang Beihai (The Dark Forest - Cixin Liu)
#quote#three body problem#the dark forest spoilers#i initially wrote down this quote because of how beautiful it is#at the time it only seemed like an observation of how much humanity has changed over time#but now i can't help but think about what he does later on...#saying he is a defeatist or escapist doesn't feel like it captures his motivations#he realised they changed and knows they will have to change even more#his motivation is not simply catastrophising or fleeing but rather *developing*#if that makes sense?#to him going into space was the only logical next step for humanity to survive#making this quote as much an observation as it is a prediction#which is beautifully done#also thinking about his thought later on of how instead of finding a habitable planet they might be travelling in space forever#but that this generation wasn't ready yet to consider that#of course his ship had to be called Natural Selection lol not very subtle there#also:#the phrasing 'we' against 'you' makes me think that he knew he wouldn't be a part of this in the end#for someone who thinks things through as much as he does#some part of him must have realised there would be no place for him in this new version of humanity#ah i'm having many feels over here#(still not a fan of someone acting all by themselves and justifying all their actions with 'duty'#but i find him a lot more interesting than expected and also like him a lot more)#...this may have worked better as an actual text post rather than this mess of tags but here we are#zhang beihai#the dark forest
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Had the extremely upsetting experience of a mutual of like 6 years going off on me for occasionally making posts about supporting Harris because apparently that makes me a g n cide denier who refuses to learn and grow, with all of my views just being assumed not even from what I've told them I believe or what I've posted before, but just because I DON'T post particularly the kind of things they THINK I should be. When I pointed out how much they were just completely assuming about stuff I'd never talked to them about, I was told it doesn't matter what I do in real life or "care" about if I simply disagree with their conclusion and vote for her anyway. Like they were absolutely not sorry for the level of maliciousness they not just assumed of my character, but for some reason thought appropriate to bring directly to me before unfollowing me. No apology whatsoever for how discomforting or upsetting that might be and certainly no acknowledgment that I could disagree with them and still be a good person. I just got another even longer rant about how they fundamentally can't fuck with me because of this one thing, no matter WHAT else I do in my real life (which I pointed out that they do not know), and how I'm directly supporting fascism.
Like seriously what is it about Tumblr that makes people think they know someone based off of occasional posts? There were just such DEEP assumptions they were making of me and going off of very little or absolutely nothing. Around the time I first became mutuals with that person I used to express my personality and beliefs and talk about what was going on in my life a lot more openly, but I've significantly scaled back on doing that in many ways for many reasons. One of my major ones is privacy and the way I've had strangers outside my followers and following circles just find random things I say and dogpile me for it. I was fundamentally changed after some T Fs did that to me like 3 years ago. I also just didn't have many conversations w that person anymore (I message people in general on here like 10x less than I did circa 2018-2019, which I'm somewhat sorry about!). My point is to say I think this person felt comfortable assuming that they knew me, especially who I am in 2024 at the age of 25, much better than they actually did.
One of the specific things they accused me of was being afraid of learning and growing (because I don't perform social media activism on here like they think I should). Like AFRAID to take criticism. When again I've never received criticism from them or had to respond to any criticism on here before as pertaining to my views on... well, absolutely any of the issues they accused me of not caring about. They essentially treated it as if the only thing in the world I cared about was the US election and characterized me as the most out-of-touch liberal they could possibly imagine, because I'm not "pushing" Kamala Harris to be better (Oh?? Should I do that on here?? Does she read my blog??).
And most hypocritically what they said was that I only *sometimes* *vaguely* post pro-Harris things (I often post like 5 or fewer things in a day though?). But here's the kicker. "Because I know I'll get shit for it. And rightfully so."
Really????? Not a single person, anon or not, in my messages or in a tagged post or anything, has ever given me shit before for saying who I'm voting for. I'm actually NOT afraid of "getting shit" for that opinion, I just don't start fights with people who are anti-voting. And why should I??? I genuinely don't believe in trying to change the minds of strangers on the internet about that sort of thing. I'm just not confrontational about it; that is so not the same thing as being "afraid of getting shit." I'm not posting ENOUGH about my support for Harris, therefore I'm afraid. But therefore they can also make all these assumptions about me being their strawman for an ignorant Harris supporter.
I'm afraid of getting shit but I still post anyway? But if I weren't afraid of getting shit I'd be posting a lot more?? This is ALL based on their assumptions of what my blog *should* look like, based on what I really and truly believe. My level of posting every now and then is an accurate gauge of my feelings on complex, sensitive, global issues. Because I'm voting for the Democratic presidential candidate and I'm ok sharing pretty much just that little glimpse of myself.
I really don't think that person knows just how inappropriate and insulting that is to just say all of that to me. Like they really know what's going on in my head. Their first message began and ended with like "I'm sorry I love you I just can't take it anymore" but they clearly weren't sorry enough to try and be more respectful to me, and they didn't love me enough not to default to extremely ungenerous assumptions and attacking me based off of those instead of any actual words I've said that they take issue with.
Online radicalization is real and it's not necessarily bad because your political views can start to fall well out of the contemporary Overton window. The way you find it appropriate to treat people whose views, however common, seem to fundamentally misalign with yours... that does matter. You can't just assume the worst of everyone and then act on that in how you approach them as individuals. And then be shocked that you don't stay friends with them. You can't be confrontational with someone about an issue you've never had an honest conversation about, and then expect them to take your bad faith in them as reasonable well-meaning criticism.
I'm afraid of criticism??? I'm afraid of criticism. No I'm not. This person and I have never had an issue before where they criticized me and I got harshly defensive. It was ALL projection. The entire tone of their messages was as if all their anti-voting posts recently were somehow in communication with the occasional go-vote-for-Harris posts that I make. That's not a conversation. I don't post for your satisfaction. I don't post in "response" to my mutuals I disagree with. I just post what's on my mind, sometimes, about some things. I really again can't stress enough how baffled I am by this
#tales from diana#long post#this is not really a post about voting this is a post about online etiquette#i also remember that this person at one point when we were teenagers had a crush on me#so they might have somewhat idealized me or maybe just had respect for the good times#good conversations we had over the years etc#i still held them in regard even though some of their anti-voting posts i took serious issue w#again i really don't care to argue w ppl against voting bc really i mainly only disagree w that one conclusion#the systemic critiques that were made in those posts i don't think make them bad ppl#i sympathize w why someone might think that way#i just cannot pretend that i think nothing changes if we have dt as president again#i can't act as if im not anxious at the state of the world we're in where we're seriously at risk of that#i don't have that same level of concern about harris. i don't. i don't think theyre the same#i think they diverge in so many meaningful ways but im usually not writing detailed long thoughtful posts about it#do i have to??? for TUMBLR?? id rather not...#but i don't wish to be confronted as if these are nuances i MUST not hold in my opinion#can't stress enough they were basically calling me a g n cide denier like that's just a cool ok thing to do#i have literally never made a post about ppl not voting for harris bc of the war in gaza#i specifically haven't not because im 'afraid' but bc i don't believe in comparing those 2 things#there was gonna be a presidential election this year anyway and there does not have to be this war#if u think dems aren't doing well enough on the war for u to vote for them. i can't argue w u#but i was always going to vote anyway#again im afraid of getting shit?? ONLY this person has EVER given me shit until now#im not pushing harris enough? how tf do u know that? bc im not reblogging ill-informed posts from ppl like u?#im not PUSHING this woman running for president enough bc im not writing critical posts she and her advisers will never see#about how im threatening to withhold my vote from them. something id never honestly do considering the opposition#they kept stressing to me to about how they weren't a trump supporter when *i* never said as much to them#i do agree that not voting for harris 'supports' trump in that it benefits him overall#but i don't attack ppl who just aren't voting in that way. ok?#damn i hate being on the defensive like this
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think i've worked out why isa's storyline feels so off to me... his entire narrative comes to a head with him confessing to sif slash "overcoming his cowardice". his talk about sif being mean to him essentially came down to "that was a dick move but it's kinda cool you know me so well". he never really has a moment of real disagreement/anger with sif like the others, and he always like, agrees with sif and goes along with what sif's doing. like having a crush doesn't mean you can't disagree with them or get angry with them.
like, isa has a facade & everyone just... falls for it & calls him the emotionally competent one & the smart one & etc. he may be emotionally competent to an extent but he's a lot better with others than himself. & sif is oblivious/self-hating enough that they miss a lot around this kinda thing.
i think i'm not a big fan of "character jealous over people being close with their crush" or "having a crush is 89% of a character's personality" tropes
#i'm willing to give this some leeway bc ppl w crushes do tend to want to do things their crushes do/enjoy#but it's the wholesale agreement that really. ruins it all for me#can we talk abt isa's self confidence & jealousy issues & how his view on bravery/dedication has changed over time.#can isa have a personality outside having a crush. pls.#like. everyone goes 'they're in a relationship post canon!' but. idk if that'd actually be like. the best thing. esp not in the long run#they might have mutual crushes but does that mean they should be in a relationship. kinda thing#isat#isat spoilers#i'm tagging for sorting purposes
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I occasionally wish to reach out to old friends/acquaintances I haven't spoken to since high school/some other even earlier time in my life, but I have SOOO little social energy even for required tasks (like making dr phone calls or etc), I never have any leftover for extra ones, and it would be very odd to message someone I haven't spoken to in like 5 years out of the blue but then take 4 entire months to respond back lol.. My natural curiosity with nostalgia/collecting details of the past/etc. (literally if I were born a little earlier I would definitely do scrapbooking or something lol) is very strong, but, alas, not strong enough to beat out the Social Issues Demons apparently
#facebook always does that 'here's a post from this day 8 years ago' thing. and I see old comments interacting#with people and it's so like.. OOOOO~~ where are they now?? what's going on? how much have they changed as people?#how much are they the same? this is fascinating. i should contact them!!' but then it's like... take that to it's logical conclusion though#you would contact them and then IF they even responded it would take you 80 years to respond and then they would#think there was something wrong or that you were trying to be insulting or something. To contact anyone I need to include an 85 page#disclaimer of all of my social issues & mental illness things. 'If i take 3 weeks to reply I promise it has nothing to do with u' etc lol#THIS is why more people need to be into phone calls/voice calls/some form of audio real time communication/etc.#I think one of the main things that's hard about messaging through text for me is it's so unscheduled and open ended#(plus it takes forever if you're talking about anything in detail and gets very long very quickly)#because like you can send a message and then just get a reply whenever. and then you're expected to reply back whenever#so it's like you never know when the response will come or when a new obligation to reply can come up? so it's like this sudden thing with#no outline?? if that makes sense. whereas a phone call is very like 'hello let's schedule a call from 10am - 2pm on thursday'. And you know#EXACTLY when the interaction will start and EXACTLY when it will end and you can plan around it in your schedule easily.#I have the reverse thing of a lot of people (how people don't pick up phone calls/hate calls/only text)#I would literally talk on the phone with a stranger. I would have a discord voice chat with someone I barely know.#if someone I hardly even remember from elementary school asked to have a voice call with me out of nowhere I would do it.#but if a stranger MESSAGED me?? or someone I barely know sent me a TEXT or something?? I will never reply probably#It's just too vague and weird. and you can't read voice tone over text. and the interaction could last forever with no clear end#point and etc. etc. But a call is like. set. established. clear boundaries. you can read the flow of conversation better. rapport. etc. etc#I get that I guess people feel more anonymous or distanced over text?? but you can have fake phone numbers on the computer. or do like disc#rd calls. or zoom without a camera or etc. etc. Also the distance that's present in text is BAD distance because it just means that tone is#not conveyed properly and you will never truly get a sense of the person's conversational vibe or mannerisms or how well you really click.#ANYWAY ghgjh...... I'm so so so interested in concepts of like.. How did that one kid I used to talk to in elementary school#but then they moved away in 5th grade - how did they end up? what are they doing now?? etc. etc. Like despite the severe social anhedonia#and general lack of connection with others I'm just really fascinated in like.. idk. the human development of it all and like#the concept of how we're actually a million different people through the course of our lives ever evolving in different iterations and etc.#PLUS again. i love nostalgia. sometimes old peple you know might remember a shared memory or can tell you about something you forgot#or etc. like it's SUCH A COOL THING in CONCEPT but I am too socially inept generally speaking lol. which people I still talk to today are#familiar with my 'phone call once every few months' communication style. but strangers would just be like... wtf. And I don't blame them#Sure I literally cannot change the physical health + brain issues i have - but also I know enough to not put others through that lol
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What they don’t tell you about autism is that it feels like you’re simultaneously one step outside of reality yet two steps too far into it at all times
#chatter#salt grain thoughts#autism#I truly don’t know what I’m explaining here#but this is what I feel like constantly when I’m inferacing with the world#too far away from it yet also too inmeshed in it at the same time#like I react to things with a weird sense of almost astonishment like I’m experiencing everything fresh for the first time every time#(I don’t literally go ���woah’ or anything but the intensity of the thing never changes)#which can either be good or like most times overwhelming#it’s probably why I keep myself so zoned out a lot of time#…#might just be a me thing but this feels quite connected to how my brain works I guess#feels like my head is just never goddamn prepared to experience anything at all#which lends to the whole needing control over your environment thing with autism#gotta have some sort of expectation and consistency happening or else your nervous system might shit itself
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i’ve stopped expecting interesting animation from bones. the star and stripe fight is cool but like every other fight/moment in mha, it’s only cool bc the source material itself is cool; bones does nothing to elevate the manga
they rarely try to experiment with colour and style. i saw so many colourings of the moment star and stripe made a giant version of herself out of the air; people made her look like a cosmos, like it reflected and bent the sky around her, doing so many inventive things and for the anime to just make her an outline against that godforsaken sky? i’m disappointed
but people will take me saying i’m disappointed and spin it to me saying the fight was bad. it wasn’t, just like most fights and moments in the anime aren’t bad but that’s all bc horikoshi knows how to draw. they never do anything beyond that; they never try and adapt it. whether it’s bc of time, direction, budget, or what have you, they will never do something truly inventive with their colouring
i’ve said this before and i’ll say it again, it’s not just that the sky is blue; it’s what the blue sky represents and that is an unwillingness to broaden their colour palette or atmosphere to support the changes in the tone of the story. the story isn’t just “will midoriya get into his dream high school and achieve his dream job?” it’s child abuse and societal systems and their dysfunctions, it’s racism and morality and is it right to try and save someone who’s determined to destroy the world just bc they are also a victim?
look at the finale of atla, a show that mirrors the narrative tone of mha; it starts out bright and colourful and vibrant to match the happy and small stakes nature of the story and as the tone of the story changes, the environment changes to reflect that. the siege of the north pole? everything goes blood red when the moon spirit is threatened, then goes completely desaturated when it is killed with only fire bending having any colour. the day of black sun? uses a solar eclipse to change the lighting. the entire sozin’s comet fight? has red skies and lighting to show the threat
bones abject refusal to change anything about the art itself is a detriment to horikoshi’s complex narrative
#its not just about the colour of the sky#lets get that straight#we’re doing some real the curtains arent just blue shit here so keep up#colour and lighting are a very deliberate choice in any visual medium#and choosing to ignore it and not take advantage of it will just be a detriment to whatever youre creating#i see so many colourings of manga panels where they do insane things and really do next level colourings#and to then see the anime that has so much money and talent behind it just for it to be flat and emotionless with no atmosphere?#it sucks#when you can pick out a scene from something called the WAR ARC and it looks the same as the sports festival arc? come on#and i know theres more to making a scene out of a panel then there is to colouring one#but when these indie creators doing visually gorgeous colourings its hard not to feel like the anime is lacking#and when your colours are flat and your camera angles are uninteresting then what is the point of an anime adaptation#even if they do change things here and there like the endeavour v hood fight or all might v afo#it doesnt change that the majority of the time its the exact same#and when the storm eventually comes round? that wont satisfy me either enless they change the colors of everything as well to be desaturate#and fully embrace the new atmosphere that horikoshi has very deliberately drawn#class a v deku is the one time they did a sustained colour difference and theres a reason that went over so well#coming out of my cage and ive been doing just fine.txt#go beyond plus ultra#mha#bnha#my hero academia#boku no hero academia#star and stripe#shigaraki tomura#izuku midoriya#bakugou katsuki#save post
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I was just ambushed within the turbulent halls of my own mind by some headcanons about rye ingellvar's childhood that did 15000000 points of psychic damage to me and my heart personally and also made me almost sure of how I want to play it all at the end (very very differently from how I imagined going in!). some 'oh holy fuck this changes everything' rocking my own world bullshit going on in my neurons right now I'm reeling
#I'm sorry to say that despite what I expected I think the dread wolf might be going down violently on my first run???#not because *I* love solas any less but because of who rye is and some of the twists I know happen down the line#which does make for a neat thing b/c I meant to play the crow I'm going with second as initially incredibly hostile#and then growing to feel for him and redeeming him at the end.#so if rye starts out very reasonable and sympathetic and then is brought to 'haha. no. fuck you forever for that in particular' at the end#...a pleasing cosmic symmetry in it I must admit. perfect and also makes me feel a bit sick#I'll try to put together something coherent eventually but for now#it's sort of a 'my name is ellaryen ingellvar you killed the guy#that my brain went 'close enough welcome back beloved and much missed deceased father figure' over. prepare to despair and die'#I think just the killing part might not have done it but everything that comes after? rye is a chill guy until he finally decides#that enough is fucking *enough*. and that was the most enough of all time for them#it also explains rye's accent (one of his primary caregivers growing up was a dwarf)! so many birds with one stone here#also I am so fucking sad now and I did it entirely to myself. I love fiction I love games (embarassingly genuine)#dragon age#dragon age: the veilguard#dragon age: the veilguard spoilers#dragon age spoilers#oc: ellaryen ingellvar#thank god that the romanced solas playthrough is the second one tho that does make things less dire haha#adaar would have given it the good old college try to get solas to change his mind right to the end I think#but even his capable hands and politician's mind could not hold back the sheer beware the fury of a patient man storm#that is about to hit solas for the shit he just pulled. I think rye and solas are -- as it turns out -- TOO alike in many ways#...solas buddy I'm so sorry I'll come back for you on the second playthrough and make it right I swear fhsak#it's just that a second dead dwarf dad has joined the chat to haunt the narrative (and this time it's fucking personal frfr)#it's almost scary how quick I've gotten attached to my rook tho. I've waited A DECADE to save this bald elf man from himself#and then rye shows up with steel in his normally kind eyes going 'no. I want that fucker *dead*'. and I just go anything for you babyboy#I'll see what we can do. unspeakable stuff
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finished dhes & kel's character pages so here are the lil edits i made for both of em :-)
#myedits#kelly#dhestyn#ik i posted kel’s already but now i am posting both pictures together#i have read through the bios so many times atp that i don't even know if they make sense anymore#i cannot look at them again#i'm just gonna say they're good enough#i might change some stuff here & there but for now#i am over it lol#i'll probably do the rest of the characters eventually..........#maybe...........#but idk. i only really post the boys here so like. yea. yk.#plus i still have the mbz character page to do#which. that has like. so many characters on it. it's a daunting task#i hope the boys' pages are at least somewhat coherent. i tried to be concise & to the point. uh. idk if i was successful in that#but. n e way. i have a few edits & writing things i wanna work on so. character pages are moving to the back burner#i may or may not finally start writing the 90sAU#which btw ty guys for being so nice on that edit???? the comments & tags were all so sweet?????#i really liked that one so i'm glad y'all liked it too
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Coda and Ichor! (Catacombtale Style!)
These two don't have a *ton* of interaction in the Main story, but since Ichor and Balance are the only two characters I've fully designed, Coda gets stuck next to him, haha!
BONUS art jumpscare:
These two actually exist in another project I'm working on too called Codex, which is basically just removing the UT aspects of Catacombtale and doing a lot more worldbuilding and character design!
Coda is older in Codex and is marked by an old God (which should get him jailed or killed, as it means for everyone else) but he hides it for years and years before he finally flees the complex he's living in to go confront the gods and stop their destructive path. Meanwhile Ichor is much the same, only he's much more ready and willing to help Coda without much prompting. Here he's also sort of a Koi Fish! (His brother is a Betta Fish)
#utmv#utmv sans#utmv oc#my art#spot!drawn#utmv art#Catacombtale#Ichor Sans#Coda#ichor#Ichor is so funny to me because his Brother (Reward) uses puzzles and then a final battle as his “Challenge” but Ichor?#his Challenge is to tell him the best Pun you know. He is the God of Puns after all!#(I think he hides his true nature as God of Punishment from the player as long as possible. saying his bro is so cool for being a major god)#Coda is a human with a lot of integrity and stubborn morals. even Determination can't escape the Gods wrath. but integrity?#Gods have a code to respect a soul who follows their own nature and still co-exists despite it just like themselves#so Coda is primed to help out.#his sister is about 7 abd she's a soul of Bravery#which means Hearth (who watches over her as a safe-space from the eyes of the other gods) has his hands full#trying to keep her from charging after Coda#Coda is so funny because he'll just walk in sonewhere and start a “Nuh-uh” contest with any given god and like... usually ends up winning???#and usually the Challenges are more gentle because he's still a young mortal. hardly a Hero. certainly not the one of prophecy#everyone figures Asgore or Undyne will kill them but uhhh. yeah. no that doesn't happen.#There's a lot of Lore here but like...#one additional thing is that in the story Coda manages to spend enough time with Ichor to obtain an item#“Sans' Protection Charm.” /Ichor gave it to you. Says to keep hold of it when facing danger. It seems like an old keepsake./#that charm is one that Ichor carved years and years ago and he only gives out charms to mortals he cares for#not only has the underground seen his rage boil (even while chained) but they have also seen his sorrow. no one wants to be the one to kill#the mortal he has deemed harmless. some fear he might have another outburst. others worry he'd fall down.#it has no real stat changes but when Coda equips it? it's like turning on Easy Mode for Godly Challenges
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i dont get when ppl say "atsushi would be horrified" at something thats probably just another tuesday for him
#yall atsushi is sheltered as in he doesn't know the real world literally cuz he was locked up#not that he doesn't know how evil or awful ppl can be#sure maybe some things he'll be horrified - especially since he usually seems to sympathize and empathize but stop treating him like he's#only seen good things in his life and doesn't know how hard it gets#i think atsushi would really only react to the specifics of dazai's relationship with akutagawa in terms of akutagawas past but i dont thin#hed start being scared of dazai or anything#i think he might take some time to process it but atsushi is aware of the dazai that dazai has changed into too#also in terms of atsushi not wanting to kill#when he realized that he killed shibusawa he had a little break down and then he got the fuck over it lmao#so idk whats this stuff about atsushi not being able to handl ever killing anyone#like he doesn't like unnecessary killing and he doesn't like not valuing life but still guys come on#also when ppl talk about atsushi not understanding or getting the fact that dazai wants to kill himself#like okay yea atsushi isnt dazai he'll never understand but sometimes ppl act like atsushi doesn't know what suicide is#or that despite his strong want and thirst to survive he also doesnt also think itd be better if hed died in a ditch#what else#also i dont like when ppl say atsushi is weirdly mean to akutagawa becuz akutagawa showed up and in a way confirmed atsushis worst fears#bringing misfortune to those around him#and then tried to kill him#and then resented him for dazai liking him more even tho thats not atsushis fault at all#fuck id throw dazai's name back at akutagawas face too#and he did come to understand and care for him to some extent#atsushi cares about akutagawa i dont understand how ppl can think he doesnt#anyway#also atsushi canonically gives ppl who've hurt him second chances like look at lucy why would he turn his back on dazai ever
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wow i haven't actually posted anything in months now and really haven't said anything in a while, huh... here's a fast sketch i did of that one 'draw your ocs as this' meme that i decided to color in, and ended up really liking so i'm sharing it with you all lmao
but yeah i've just been super busy with life recently and haven't felt too happy with a lot of the art i've been making recently. i've been fighting off some art block since late last year and miiiight be close to getting over it soon now from resting and getting back into the groove again. and my style has changed just enough for me to notice differences so i'm happy with that. so yeah, i'll be posting more art again soon, hopefully, without issues
#also i changed my name again so i have to figure out a new tag for my art and replies lmaoooo so tired-#oc#original character#magical girl#magical girl oc#mahou shoujo#mahou shoujo oc#digital art#momoko hayashi#ludris#its been way too long since ive made proper art of momoko and everyone from her story that i got really rusty drawing her#the silly puppet brainrot took over long enough that i forgot how i normally draw her-#but it also worked in my favor since i now color hair in a new fun way and her hair has changed to where its more fluffy looking#doing my normal rambling in the tagssssss i might share some info about a few other things im working on at the same time#me casually trying to balance three project ideas at the same time is a bad decision but i cant help it
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