#some people DO look alike this is a fact of life but it's barely ever the people kpoppies say 🚶‍♀️

[liinos]

idk what twt stan needs to hear this but "jyp's alice in borderland line" really do not look that much like the characters like... at all😭

[ja3hwa]

♡ 𝐊𝐧𝐢𝐠𝐡𝐭 𝐈𝐧 𝐁𝐥𝐨𝐨𝐝𝐢𝐞𝐝 𝐀𝐫𝐦𝐨𝐮𝐫 | 𝐉.𝐘𝐇 ♡

Day Sixteen - Fae/Orc ft. Size Kink

【Synopsis】 : Yunho was a myth amongst men. Yet here he stood, ready to protect you and take you away from the cruel life you lead... Only catch is you have to give him something in return...your hand in marriage.

『Word count』 : 7.78k

-> Genre: Smut. Fantasy. Angst.

Pairing: Chief!Orc!Yunho x Princess!Fae!Reader

[Warnings] : Swearing. Blood. Gore. Reader is heavily conflicted with herself and was abused by her family. Fighting. Dry humping. Yelling. Crying. Cocky Yunho. Kinda mean Yunho at the start. Self hatred. Drooling. Mocking. Pet names. Dirty talking. Multiple orgasms. Unprotected sex.

Note: I want to state that, for the most part, this can be read as dub-con. But I want to assure you that nothing terrible happens in this story. I don't want to spoil anything, but please read this with caution. If anything in the warnings triggers you, please, for your sake and mine, do not read this fanfiction.

Also, I'm really proud of this, and I definitely enjoyed writing this type of genre. So please give it all the love ♡♡

Networks: @k-vanity @wonderlandnet @illusionnet @cromernet

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Storm Caller: A fierce warrior and saviour of the world. He is the chief of one of the largest orc clans there have ever been. Most knew him as cruel, dangerous, and unforgiving. His people had raided village after village, and now here he was directing his beastly men to capture any humans, Elvin and Fae, they could find. But what no one knew was that he was looking for someone in particular, a sweet little fae to be his chieftess.

A princess to be exact.

There were rows and rows of cages. Humans and fae alike chained and scared. No one moved, not even much of a peep as the orc chief walked past each and every one of the enclosures. It was only when he got to your cage that he stopped. His eyes fell onto your shaking figure in nothing but tatted rags. His lips curled into an evil smirk.

You noticed the presence in front of you, shuffling yourself until your back hit the cold wall behind you. You gulp with a dry mouth, fear crackling down your body. Storm caller chuckled, walking right up to the bars of the cage, his eyes never leaving you. The other orcs quickly parted to make way for their leader, letting the chief get the perfect view of his reward. "And who might you be, little one?"

Storm caller knew who you were. In fact, you were the exact Fae he had been searching for. But he loved the way you shifted under his gaze; he couldn't help himself. Your eyes raked over the orc, seeing his armour. His deep green skin was a stark contrast to the bloodied metal.

"I'm the Fae princess of Ellegard." Your words were small, barely a whisper, even though you tried to sound authoritative. The orc whistled to the guard, indicating for the cage to be opened, which the other orc followed suit swiftly. He stepped into the cage, towering over you with his huge figure, his smug smile hiding a bit of concern but never faltered from its sinisterness.

"A fae princess? My, my, how. Delicate." His deep voice made you gulp with a strange tingle in your gut, causing your wings to shiver slightly. His head tilted at the sight, his eyes darkening. "Stand."

You listened, standing tall on your shaky limbs. You were covered in dirt, even your wings stained with grime. His thick hand came up to gently brush along your appendage dusting off some of the muck, watching the sparkle move along his fingers as he did. "Such pretty things... it would be a shame if they were to break."

You gasp, taking a step back, almost falling, but his hand comes to grab your waist quickly, holding you up. "No, please. I can't live without my wings."

He smirked again as he heard your sweet little gasp. His hand tightens on your waist while the other continues to run along the veins of your sheer appendages. "I could easily rip them off you if I wanted to. You're at my mercy, little princess."

Your hand comes up to brush against his chest, feeling the cold metal under your small hand. A tear pricked the corner of your eye as you watched him with a pleading gaze while he continued to touch you. "P-please. Don't hurt me."

He pouted mockingly as he carefully wiped the tear away with his thumb. For an orc, he was extremely gentle—almost caring. "Awe, don't cry. I have no intention of hurting you. All you will be doing is proving yourself to me."

"P-proving?" You finally meet his gaze, staring deep into his pitch-black eyes. His smile grows as he nods, loosening his grip on you. He walks back over to the bars of the cage, running a finger along the rust.

"Yes, prove yourself. Prove that you're worthy of being my Cheiftess. That you're strong enough to be by my side and rule my clan with me." He turns back around with a determined look. An almost crazed gaze in his eyes.

You stare at him with shock, covering your mouth with your hand to mumble, "Chieftess!? You want to take me as a wife!"

He chuckled, a deep, guttural sound. "That's right. I've been looking for someone to be my wife, someone to rule beside me and bear my children. And you, little princess, have caught my eye."

You looked towards the locked door and noticed you were completely alone. All the orc guards had left you alone with him... You gulped, "But... you're an orc, and I'm a fae..." Your eyes briefly wander down to the cloth that hides his lower half. "We are of different sizes..."

He follows your gaze before letting out a low, amused laugh. "Ah, yes. The size difference. That doesn't matter, little one. I'm certain we can make it work."

You swayed a little from side to side, unsure of what to say. Or what to do. Your mind was all over the place, from the war only breaking out a moon ago to laying awake in a Dungeon, crying yourself to sleep while begging for death to take you away. You had no idea who had raided your home, only hearing whispers from others that the man was cruel and beastly. You still would have never thought it would be him. The beast of myth. The creature you read about in text. Jeong Yunho... the Storm caller. The great change.

Yunho was right next to you when you shook the fog from your eyes. He was so close to the point that you could feel the heat of his body once again. His voice dropped to a low, sultry tone. "Are you afraid, princess? Afraid of what I might do to you? Or what I might make you do?"

Your eyes widened, stuttering, "I... I don't know."

He chuckles, his hand reaching up to gently caress your cheek. "Well, I'm gonna take that as a yes. So don't worry, you're pretty little head. I'm gonna take good care of you." His touch was so gentle, so comfortable. You couldn't help but feel completely conflicted by his actions and his words. Never in your life would you ever think someone would speak so softly towards you. Calling you such sweet names. Actually look at you instead of through you... And it also happened to be by enemy number one.

From the destruction of your home and the increasing number of orcs that would outweigh your species. Deep down, you knew there was no other choice than to play along until you could escape and find your family. So you nod slowly to him, accepting his offer.

He smiles, his hand moving from your cheek to your chin, gently tilting your head up to look at him. "Good girl. You're a fast learner. I like that. Now, let's get you out of this cage, shall we?"

You nod again, choosing to stay silent for the moment. He simply grins, his eyes glistening with a mix of lust and excitement as he reaches into his pocket to pull out a key. He moves from your body to unlock the cage door before reaching his hand out for you to take. "You're mine now, princess, and I intend to make sure you never forget it."

You yelp as he grabs your wrist, pulling you snugly against him. The grip was firm but not painful. There was tenderness hidden beneath. "Now, let's get you cleaned up. You're a mess, princess."

You follow him close, eyeing where everything is. Fires burning, tents set up everywhere. Your home was as good as gone. And you didn't know how to feel about it. Anger? Joy? The looming question was if your parents—the king and queen—were even still alive. He led you through the back end of the camp, his hands still wrapped around your wrist as he guided you into a huge tent. He pushes the flap aside as he leads you inside, the interior of the tent dimly lit by a few lanterns hanging from the ceiling.

The tent is spacious, with a large couch-like bed on the left side with a few chairs and tables scattered around the edge. There was also a small fire pit in the middle of the tent, and a few animal pelts laid out on the floor around it. "Welcome to my quarters, princess. You'll be staying here for now until we can go home."

"Home..." You whispered with a gulp as you held your stomach. The large orc noticed your nervous expression. He gave you a gentle, toothy smile, eyes raking over your shaky body.

"You look scared, princess. Don't worry, I won't bite," he leans down to whisper in your ear, "much."

Your eyes widen as you look around the room, slowly trying to free your hands from his tight grip. Panic suddenly set in. The sudden need to run was becoming increasingly prominent.

He noticed you trying to free your hands, so he tightened his grip, pulling you closer to him. "Ah ah ah, no escaping, princess. You're mine now, remember? You can't go anywhere without my permission."

You felt a nerve snap. "Yes, I'm aware of that." You speak bluntly. "I just wish to have my hands free." You look at him with a squinted expression, annoyance lingering in your tone. "I will not flee. I promise."

He eyes you for a moment, studying your face before finally relentingly, releasing your wrists. "Very well, princess. But remember, you're still my prisoner. You do as I say when I say it. Understood?"

You rub your red-pained wrists as you sigh, "I understand."

He smiles, satisfied with your response. Walking over to a large chest, he opens it to pull out a simple sheer sleep-like dress. "Put this on. It'll be more comfortable than those filthy rags you're wearing."

You gaze upon the fabric he's holding, taking it slowly from him. The silk was soft, almost like royal Elvin. It was only when you held it against your frame that you noticed. This is mine!? Your eyes widened, snapping back up to see his smug face, almost as if he had read your mind. No words were exchanged, though, only longing looks and thickening tension. That was until you spoke softly, "C-could you... Turn around while I change."

Yunho simply raised a brow at your request. He eyes your figure one last time before complying with your words, turning around with arms tightly crossed. "There, happy now, Princess?"

You couldn't help but sigh lightly, feeling like you could breathe again. No longer under his strong gaze. "Yes, I am." It was a quick response, but he could hear the sweetness in your tone, making him aware there was a smile on your delicate features.

Staring at his armour-covered back, you can finally take in the detail on the metal. The flower design on the outer lining. The cloth wrapped around his waist was thick leather, most likely the skin of a dragon. You had an expectation in your head from the books, but actually seeing him in person was a different story. You couldn't seem to shake the tingle in your gut the moment you saw him. Confliction raiding your mind. A part of your brain was overjoyed; he was the one who captured you, and the other was screaming that orcs are nothing but beasts. You could hear your mother screaming at you, calling you tainted for even thinking such a beast could be an equal to your own species.

But then again, no one was equal to Fae. She hated other creatures, considering all of them as slaves or peasants. Your father would even strike you if you ever tried to suggest otherwise. But your feelings did not matter. The longing did not matter. Nothing did. Only your parents mattered. Only the kingdom mattered. You had a duty, and you had to follow it. Otherwise, you are unclean.

Yunho's low chuckle caught you out of your thoughts—that you hadn't even noticed you slipped into. His head shook, still facing away from you. "You're a shy princess. I have to admit it's adorable. But you need to hurry up, little one. I don't have a lot of time."

You sporadically look around the room in search of the exit. Once spotting it, without another thought, you jump into flight, weaving towards it. But as you reached for the slit in the tent, Yunho turned around just in time to see what you had planned. Surprise painted his expression as he lunged forward, grabbing you by the waist before rotating you so he could hold you flush against his chest.

"Oh no, you don't, princess. You're not going anywhere." His voice was right in your ear as you thrashed against him, flapping your wings with all the strength you could muster.

He grins, clearly enjoying your attempts to escape. Holding you tightly against his chest, his arms wrapped around you like a vice grip. But from the powerful wind of your wings, he lost his balance, falling back onto the couch with a grunt. "Stop struggling, princess. You're only making it harder for yourself."

You didn't listen; your body beginning to panic, but not because of being held by him. Your whole life had crumbled in one night. You felt guilty and refused to admit that you were happy about it. You try to wiggle off him, your hand hitting his armour. Your legs fell on either side of his waist, making you fall more snugly against him. He let out a low growl, feeling you rub against him in a way that sends shivers down his spine. He tightens his grip on you even more, his hands roaming over your body, finding the base of your wings. "I said, stop struggling, little one. You're only making this more fun for me."

Your wings had stopped their flapping, but your hips continued to buck. He let out a sharp gasp, his head tilting back slightly, feeling your little frame struggle against him. Your clothed pussy was rubbing against his growing cock so nicely, he couldn't help himself from feeling more and more aroused with each passing breath. "Oh, princess... you're playing with fire now."

He used the hand that was at the base of your wings to snake up to grab a fist full of your hair, tugging you back, forcing you to look up at him. "You're feisty, you know that."

There was rage clouding your judgement, all the pent-up aggression you had bottled up for years, finally overspilling, but you were yelling at the wrong person, "I will never listen! Never submit. I didn't ask for any of this!" You finally settled, but only to hit him against his metal-covered chest.

"I have had people try to mould me into their perfect tool. But they had all failed. I will never listen." You hit him again, your knuckles starting to redden. "I'm not your perfect little daughter. I will never be pure enough for you." Tears rolled down your red, flustered cheeks, your knuckles bloody and bruised. You finally stopped, sobbing quietly while your forehead fell against his chest.

His expression becomes unreadable as he watches your little outburst. He had been told by one of his informants that you were being abused by your family, but he didn't expect you to be so...broken. He couldn't help but feel the desire to slaughter everyone who had hurt you. His grip on your hair loosened. "You do not have to be perfect for me..." He lifted up your face to wipe your tears as he said your name for the first time tonight. 

Your face was inches from his, and you hadn't realised until the cool breeze brushed over your shoulder that while struggling, one of his claws must have torn the strap to your shirt, exposing your soft skin slightly. "Looks like your clothes are getting a little torn up, princess. I guess I got a little too rough with you during our struggle."

You blushed, looking away from him. "Then unhand me." Even though you tried to speak firmly, you no longer made an effort to move, feeling like all your adrenaline had washed away. You had become vulnerable in front of the enemy... Maybe your mother was right. You were simply just useless.

He gave out a lowly chuckle, fully loosening his grip on you. His hand rested on your hip while the other ran a finger along your exposed flesh. "And why should I, baby? I think I quite like having you in my arms."

"You cannot hold me in your arms forever." You huff, placing both my hands on his strong chest, moving to sit completely straight, staring up at him.

"Maybe not forever, but for now, I shall hold you. And I'm going to enjoy every moment of it." He smirks as he pulls you closer to him. You lean back in annoyance, taking in his whole demeanour. Your arms cross over your chest, pushing your breasts up, making more cleavage pop out the top of your rags. You notice his eyes flicker down to your chest, lingering on the plump flesh for a moment before snapping his stare back up to your face. "You poor sweet thing. Why would anyone ever want to hurt you..."

You were stunned by his words, feeling your heart race at his softness. Noticing your shocked silence, Yunho had to smile brightly, his tusks being shown off proudly in the grin. "You are too cute. And I bet you'd look even cuter under me."

You growled, almost sounding like an angry cat at his inappropriate remark. You couldn't lie to yourself though, knowing just how much his words affected you. But he didn't need to know that. He chuckled nonetheless, clearly amused by the noise that left your lips. He had to stroke your hair, which was surprisingly gentle as he whispered, "You're even cute when you're angry, princess."

You go to move off him again, feeling his hands loose on your frame, but when you shifted you felt your lower half rub against his half-hard cock, making you suddenly deathly aware of the situation you had gotten yourself into. You froze. "..I..."

Yunho let out a deep grumble, bucking his hips lightly while his hands tightened once again on your hips, stilling you. "You're playing with fire again. Keep doing that, and I won't be able to control what happens next."

Your gaze flutters towards what lies beneath you, seeing the large outline under the cloth and leather he is wearing. He's huge... You gulp. The orc seemingly noticed your eyes travel down, making him smirk with pride. "See something you like, Princess?" He taunts.

Snapping your head back up, you look around the room with brightened red cheeks, trying to calm your racing heart rate. "N-no..."

He growled, his smirk growing wider. "You're a terrible liar. The look on your face says everything. You were staring at my cock, weren't you, princess?"

You stutter, feeling yourself wanting to crumble into a ball and hide forever. "I don't know what you are talking about..."

Yunho grabs your chin, forcing you to look back at him. His deep, almost pitch-black eyes bore holes into your own as he read your expression. You couldn't help but clench around nothing, a pulse shifting through your cunt. He could feel every movement, making him groan while his cock twitched in response. He had to pull you closer, his hand exploring your figure. "By the gods, you drive me crazy, princess."

"Good." You poke your tongue out like some child throwing a tantrum. But Yunho was quick, snatching your tongue between his fingers. He gripped your wet appendage firmly but not too painfully.

"Careful now. You've been testing my patience all night. If you keep this up, I will punish you, darling." Your eyes widen at his action, your body shaking at the new nickname. Your mouth has to open more as his thumb pushes against your tongue, watching it create a bundle of saliva which started to leak out onto your chin and his hand. His eyes hollow with growing desire as he stares at the drool, watching it drip onto your lap. "You look so pretty like this, princess. All messy and helpless. I could do anything I want to you right now, and you wouldn't be able to stop me."

Your wings flap in annoyance as a high-pitched noise leaves your throat. His grip on your tongue tightens slightly as he mocks, "Oh, don't give me that look, princess. You brought this on yourself. You were being a brat, and now you're paying the price."

You let out a huff through your nose, mimicking the way Orc's huff when they are displeased. That made Yunho raise his brow, but then you ground your hips against him, causing his fingers to loosen on your tongue. He looked at you with a mix of surprise and lust in his eyes, watching you pull away from his grip. "Fuck you have no idea how badly I want to lose control."

It was like the world had stopped, like nothing mattered anymore. And for the first time, the power was in your hands. You weren't a doll to be dressed up and manipulated by others. You weren't a toy to be thrown around and forgotten the next. You had power and wanted to see what you could do with it. "If you want to lose control so badly, Why don't you?"

His grunt was animalistic, rumbling up his throat, his eyes narrowing even more at the challenge you gifted him. "You're asking for it, darling. Don't say I didn't warn you."

Before you could let out any snarky reply, the large orc tipped you back until you were both falling towards the floor. He held onto you tightly, his one hand bracing your head while the other held your waist, easily manhandling you onto the soft pelts that lay spread on the floor by the fire. A small 'oof' left your lips as you watched Yunho above you with pure surprise. His grin was toothy, his huge frame caging you snuggly. "You look so good like this, darling. Laying here, at my mercy. You have no idea what thoughts are running through my mind right now."

You rolled your eyes without a thought, wiggling slightly with a small pout. This caused him to chuckle, using one of his hands to grip your chin again, but this time squishing your cheeks together. "Oh, you think you're so tough, princess? Trying to act like you're not enjoying yourself right now. But I know deep down. This is all you've ever wanted. Like you said, you'll never be pure for your family. For your kingdom. So why not just fully commit to it?"

You gulp, feeling your pointed ears redden as your gaze never left his. He was right. You both knew it. You had dreams of being swept away. Having the saviour come to rescue you from your royal prison. But a part of you—the part that still is her family's little princess—wanted to stay, prove you were pure enough. Make your family proud. It was pitiful, really.

"Come on, darling? I can see the effect I have on you. Your ears and face, are all red and flushed. Your hips are bucking at every movement. The staggered pants and lust-filled eyes. You're enjoying this. You like being pinned down by a big, strong orc like me."

You shook your head no, and you don't even know why. Stop fighting, you screamed to yourself. Your parents never loved you. No one ever looked at you. But Yunho...he was looking at you and not just as a prize to be won or a trophy to be left on a stand. He looked at you like you were real. Like you deserved attention. Like you were the only thing left in this god-forsaken realm.

His expression was unreadable again, his hand moving from your chin to your hair, stroking the strands gently with a sigh. "You're a terrible liar. Must I repeat that? I can see right through you. Why must you be too stubborn to admit it?"

"I..." You stop yourself, watching his gaze never leave your own. His hand that sat on your waist, moved delicately upwards, slowly sliding along your body, feeling the tattered rags beneath the pads of his fingers.

He leans down, his lips brushing against your ear as he whispers, "I just need a yes, and I can make anything you've ever dreamt of come true. You're mine now, and I'm gonna make sure you never forget." Your whole body was shaking as he continued to move his hand along your figure. His touch is gentle but possessive at the same time.

"P-please..." You whisper, your eyes fluttering closed, your body giving in to temptation. He moves his mouth to your neck, his breath tickling your skin, but he doesn't inch closer.

"That's not a yes, darling." He grunts, his other hand moving from your hip to your thigh, pushing them open gently, holding you in place as he continues to explore your body. He watches the way your brows scrunch and your eye seal shut. The way your hips beg for friction and your mouth parts, desperate for another. But he still needed to hear you say it. He needs that single word to leave your lips.

A long, deep sigh left your lungs, but no matter how hard you tried, the word you needed didn't come out. It was like someone had held your mouth closed or taken the word from your vocabulary. And then you had an idea. Opening your eyes, you are met with Yunho's soft gaze. Storm caller was gone from his expression, leaving only him. "...Mok..." [yes]

Yunho froze, staring down at you with narrowed eyes. He couldn't believe what he had heard. You...his delicate little fae, speaking Orcish. He smiled toothly, closing the gap between his lips, latching his tongue on the hot skin of your neck. He kissed and nibbled at your jugular, his hand on your thigh gently stroking the soft skin. You spread your legs without much control, feeling yourself finally relax under him. He chuckles, his hand moving to rest on the inside of your thigh, his fingers gently tracing circles on your skin that was close to your dripping core. "That's it, Darling. Open up for me. Let me see all of you."

He takes in the way your body finally relaxes, seeing all your defences slowly wash away. His lips travel along your collarbone, where he starts to place kisses and gentle nibbles, feeling the way your body reacts to his touch. Your eyes are completely shut now while your hands unclenched from being fists. Your legs spread further, feeling the cloth that was covering your lower half now riding up your figure ever so slightly. His hand moved higher up your thigh, his fingers tracing along the hem of the fabric covering you, teasing the cotton. He pulls back slightly, his eyes roaming over your body as he takes in the sight of you spread out beneath him.

"You never need to have fear ever again..." He whispers against your skin, hearing you moan as his hand moves even higher up your plump flesh, his fingers brushing against the edge of your panties. "...Bin mog g'thazag cha.." [I will protect you.]

You felt tears run down your face as you heard his sweet words in his native tongue. The feeling of his fingers on your clothed cunt makes your hips buck and a whimper to leave your trembling mouth. He watches as your hips buck and you let out a whimper, his eyes darkening with desire. He leans down to whisper in your ear again, "So responsive, Darling. You're so sensitive. I can feel how much you want me, even through your wet panties." You feel him pull your panties to the side seeing your soaked pussy in his full. He swore he almost busted a nut right then and there. He couldn't feel but have a satisfying smirk on his face as he took you all in, "Look at that, Baby. You're so wet for me. Do you need me to touch you?"

You whimper at the cool air hitting your cunt feeling the need for more. Your hips bucking as you finally open your eyes to look up at him pleadingly, "P-please Yunho..."

He grins triumphantly, his hand moving to gently stroke your pussy, cupping it entirely. "So you do know my name, Darling..." He continues to stroke you, bringing his pointer finger to your clit, moving in slow teasing circles. "You're gonna moan my name so beautifully. I love hearing the sounds you make when I touch you. It's like music to my ears."

"Please more, Yunho." You admit.

He chuckles, his fingers moving faster as he gives you what you want. "That's a good girl, begging for more. I love seeing you like this, all needy and desperate for me. I'lI give you more, don't worry. I'lI give you everything you need and more."

You nod at his words, grinding your hips against his fingers, feeling yourself creep closer to your climax. He watched in awe, as he let out a grunt, "That's it, Darling. Fuck yourself on my fingers. Let yourself feel the pleasure. You're so close, I can feel it. Just a little bit more, and you'll come for me. Take all of it. All this pleasure is yours to take."

It didn't take long for all your pent-up emotions to come breaking through the gates, tipping you over the edge, as you come against your big orcs fingers. "Fuck..."

"That's it. Such a good girl. I knew you could do it. You're such a good girl when you listen to me." He chuckles as he pulls his hand away, watching a string of your juices soaking his fingers, even some of it leaking out onto the pelt below you. Yunho's eyes roll back as he takes his fingers inside his mouth tasting the sweetness that is you, all the while you stare in disbelief having never seen such a hot sight. "You liked that, didn't you, little one? Seeing me lick your slick off my fingers. You like seeing me taste you. You like knowing that you're mine, and can do whatever I want to you? Hmm?"

You nod a little too quickly but you couldn't care anymore. "Yes..." It was suddenly like your tongue was loosened and all the words you've kept deep inside were suddenly spilling out, "And to answer you before, I've known who you are for a long time. heard the stories of the orc who raids villages. I.. I admire you. and I felt ashamed to be a fae in love with an orc. But all the good you did. All the species you had saved, it was hard not to fall." You felt your face redden as you noticed what you had just said, all your secrets had been let out to dry. You let out a whine, covering your face with your hands. "I...I'm sorry. I shouldn't have said that."

Yunho was taken aback for a moment, before a smirk formed on his face, grabbing your wrists with a deep chestful giggle. "You've known who I am for a long time, huh? And you've been in love with me? That's quite a confession princess. I never thought a Fae would be interested in an Orc like me. But I have to admit, it's nice to hear you say that."

You sucked in a breath, watching every detail and expression on his face, "You're a war hero. I don't care if you're an orc... In fact, I love that you are." You felt a little self-conscious speaking about such things, but Yunho had made you feel like it was okay to open up.

He looks at you with a mix of surprise and pride, enjoying the way his ego was being stroked by you, "A war hero, huh? You really know how to flatter a guy. I never thought I'd hear those words from a Fae, let alone one who's in love with me. It's nice to be appreciated for my accomplishments and not just for my strength and brutality. So thank you, my darling."

You sat up slowly, watching as he followed your every move until he was on his knees. You finally take him all in, "I'm sorry for trying to run away before, I was..." You felt tears creep down your cheeks as you hiccuped, "I was so scared.... what my village would think of me. What would the Fae King and Queen... my parents would say. T-they hate orcs."

Yunho reaches out to gently wipe the tears from your puffy face. "Hey, it's okay. I understand why you were scared, little one. It's not easy to go against your family's beliefs and expectations. But you don't have to be afraid anymore. I won't let anyone hurt you, especially not your parents. You're mine now, and I'll protect you no matter what."

"You promise?" You hiccuped.

He nods, his expression serious but soft, "I promise, my love. I swear on my honour as an Orc that I will protect you and keep you safe. You're under my protection now, and no one will lay a hand on you without going through me first."

You reach for him, your hands snaking around his neck. Yunho let you guide him into a tender kiss. He was caught off guard for only a moment but quickly recovered as he wrapped his arms around your small figure, pulling you flush against his chest.

He kisses you back fiercely, his tongue dominating your mouth as he claims you as his own. You drop a hand to the knotted leather against his shoulder, untying the straps of his armour. He helps to get the chest plate and any other metal off his deep green body. Pulling away for a moment, you could finally see all the scars and blemishes on him, knowing each wound held a story. Without a second thought, your hands found the cloth around his waist, letting the fabric fall off his pelvis, freeing his angrily hard cock. He looks down at you with a mixture of desire and amusement grabbing his cock to squeeze it firmly, "Eager, are we, Darling? You can't wait to see what I'm packing, huh?"

You stutter, bring your hands to your sides as your wings shiver in anticipation. "Y-yes..." You admit.

"You're so cute when you blush, Darling. And those wings of yours are trembling with excitement. You're practically begging for it, aren't you? My precious little Fae."

You gulp, but instead of verbally responding, you decide to untangle the bow that laid on your shoulder, letting the rags fall off your figure before throwing the cloth somewhere in the room. Yunho watched with a bitten lip as his gaze darkened with lust, getting a full view of your pretty plump breasts and your dripping cunt.

"Fuck, princess. You look so beautiful like this. Spread out for me, completely bare and ready for me to take. You're certainly a sight to behold." He moves closer to you, positioning himself between your legs, his thick thighs only barely fitting. Your eyes had fogged over with a new form of adrenaline, shaking in anticipation over the idea of having him deep inside you. He positions himself at your entrance, the tip of his cock teasing your tight hole. You both took a large breath as he slowly began to ease inside you, watching as every inch of his cock sunk deeper and deeper. The burn sent your mind into a tailspin as you dropped your head back onto the soft fur below you. Most fae men were tiny and did not pack enough length or girth, but orcs, they were huge in every possible way.

"Oh, love, you're so tight. I can feel your pretty little pussy clenching so much." He chuckles at your gasp, watching your face contort in a painful pleasure. He enjoyed the feeling of your tightness around his cock. He slowly starts to push into you more and more, taking his time to make sure you can handle his size. Your screams grew louder as you basked in the feeling of him. Yunho couldn't help but groan in response to your lushish noises, feeling them fuel his own desire to keep going. "That's it, darling. Let me hear you scream. You feel so good around me. You're taking me so well, like a good girl."

He continues to push into you, his cock stretching you wider and wider until he finally bottoms out inside you, his cock buried to the hilt. He lets out a low growl of satisfaction, "You're taking all of me, baby. You're so full of me, aren't you? You're stretched around my cock like a perfect little cock sleeve."

You nod panting through your bitten lip as you stare up at him with watery eyes, "s-so full."

He smirks at your response enjoying the way you're reacting to his size, "You like being full, baby? You like feeling me stretching you out. Fill you up? You're such a good girl, taking my cock like this. I bet you'll be even more perfect when I start to move, huh?"

"Yes, Please. More. I need more." You confess, your voice raised over several octaves as your nails scrape along the pelts.

He grins at your pleading, "Oh, my love, you're so eager. You want me to start moving, huh? You want me to pound into you and make you scream my name?"

You whimper, bucking your hips against him while your hands move up to grab your thighs, holding them up so you are spread further for him to take you deeper. He growled, beginning to move, slowly at first, but then gradually picking up speed. He starts to thrust into you with a steady rhythm, his cock sliding in and out of your soaked cunt. Your screams of his name are like a broken record, and you feel like you're already coming apart.

Yunho grumbles in response. His pace picks up as he senses that you're approaching the edge. "That's it, Darling. Scream my name. Let everyone know who's making you feel this good. I can feel you getting close. Are you going to come for me again, baby?"

Tears stained your puffy red cheeks as he picked you up, holding you tight around your waist. With his brute strength, he fucked up into you at a deeper angle causing you to let out a yelp, "Yes! I'm gonna come. I want to come around your huge cock!!"

"Good girl. You can come, baby. Come for me, let go and give in to the pleasure. I want to feel you clenching around me as you come undone." He barked as he watched with narrow eyes as your wings fluttered and flapped like crazy. He placed his large palm on your back, holding you close, letting you fall into the crook of his neck, nuzzling against him. You scream his name for a final time before coming, squirting all over his cock and the floor below. He groans as you come, feeling your walls clench around him chokingly. But he continues his harsh thrusts, riding out your orgasm to prolong your pleasure.

He let you back down onto the pelts below, taking in every detail of your shaking figure. From your fluttering wings to the way your pussy kept sucking him in. "You're so beautiful when you come, you know. I can feel you squirting all over me, soaking the fur. You're a mess, but you're my mess now, darling."

A shiver runs down your spine at his words. My mess. You couldn't help but giggle lightly at the thought. You had always been a mess, a disappointment, and unwanted. But in this moment, you were more than happy to be defined as 'a mess' as long as it was solely his.

"Your mess..." You spoke with a battered breath.

Yunho smiles back at you, his expression, possessive and proud, "That's right. You're mine. You belong to me now, and I'm never letting you go. You're my mess to play with and claim whenever I want." He leaned down to kiss your cheek delicately.

"Then claim me, Yunho...C-cum inside me." You hiccup as he shifts, making you feel every bump and vein of his cock inside your overstimulated pussy.

"So eager to please me, to be mine. It's adorable. But I think you've had enough for now. I don't want to break you just yet." He chuckled, slowly pulling out of you. But without another thought, you follow his movements. Using your wings, you push yourself into his arms, making him fall onto his back, letting you straddle him.

You can feel his cock resting against your ass, grinding gently on his pelvis, you whimper, "I want you to come to Yunho. I want to feel you come inside me."

Yunho was caught off by your confession. His parted lips quickly turned into a sly smirk as he clearly enjoyed the way you were begging for him. As if you couldn't get any more perfect, you one up yourself. "You want my cum, my love? You want me to fill you up and claim you from the inside out?"

You nod, making him groan as his cock twitched against you. His hands find your hips as he picks you up effortlessly. He rotates you until you are on all fours on the pelts, and your head is facing the fire pit. "I want to make you come one more time, and then I'll give you what you want. Got it?"

You feel like your body is already growing weaker by the second but you sigh at an 'okay' while you wiggle your hips, letting him sink back inside your abused pussy from behind. He thrusts pick back up, harshly snapping his hips into you. Yunho reaches down and starts to rub your clit with his thumb, adding extra stimulation to bring you closer to the edge. "You're doing so well, baby. Just a little bit more, and you'll come again for me. I can feel you getting close again. Just let go and let yourself feel the pleasure."

Your climax came quicker than the previous, your screams were stripped from a sore throat as you tipped over the edge clamping around his large cock while you drug your nails into the soft pelts. Yunho could feel his own orgasm approaching, but he held back, wanting to savour the feeling of you coming undone around him once more. He knew he would never get over the feeling of you clenching around him, and it was going to quickly become one of his favourite things in the world. "Your body is so responsive, so eager to please me. I'm going to fill you up now, my love. I'm going to claim you and make you mine forever."

The mixture of the flame from the fire and the heat shivering down your body made you hot to the touch, and with a few more hard snaps of Yunho's hips, he finally reached his own climax. He lets out a low growl that is almost animalistic as he comes, his sticky load spilling deep inside your cunt. He keeps his cock buried inside you as he rides out his orgasm, making sure to fill you up entirely while he gazes at you. Laid out flat on the floor with a heaving chest. You were completely fucked out of my mind, sweaty and content. A smile plastered on your face, you whispered. "Thank you."

You had no real reason as to why you said those words, but in your heart made you feel like they needed to be said. Thank you for saving me. You thought. Thank you for being the hero the world needs. Thank you for keeping hope alive. Your mind wandered for the right words, but thank you was all that had come out in the end.

Yunho pulled out slowly, careful not to hurt you, but before he could say anything, he noticed you had fallen straight asleep. Your little snores make his heart swell. So he got to work, grabbing the sheets from the nearby bed before lying down next to you, wrapping his arms around your figure tightly so he could pull you close. His nose nuzzled in your messy and tangled hair as he whispered to you, "You belong to me now and I, you. Once we are home, we will be married. And you will finally have the freedom to do whatever your heart wishes."

He felt a twinge in his heart at the possibility of your parents trying to take you back, but he would gladly kill them before they would ever land another finger on you. He knows he's claimed you now, and he'll make sure everyone knows it, too, especially your filthy parents. You're his, and he'll do whatever it takes to keep you by his side. Protected and loved.

[zara-renata]

Alike and Cornered Beast: Sylus's POV

Summary:

I was desperate for Sylus's point of view during the first time that MC meets him in the Alike and Cornered Beast chapters of Long-Awaited Revelry. So I uh wrote it myself. I wanted to know why he touches MC so reverently but also quite brutally, so I spent a lot of time thinking about possibilities.

A/N:

Sylus x gender neutral reader/MC, second person POV (but we don't use Y/N in this house). Brief, derisive mentions of Xavier and Zayne (this is Sylus's POV after all, don't come for me). I love all the LIs, but Sylus has his hand wrapped around my throat and I see him as arrogantly having something to say about the other people who are also interested in his shiny treasure. He has mean thoughts about the other LIs, but he can be mean and we love that for him. Slightly canon divergent if you believe Sylus can't tell that MC is scared and repulsed by him until the shopkeeper informs him. I however believe this man is a little more perceptive than that. CW: violence, cursing, rude language, death, grief, murder, ok this is Sylus hello, non-consensual (non-sexual) touching of MC, metaphors involving hunger and blood, overuse of the word "lovely," but Sylus is a simp and it's mostly his POV so we must endure it. SFW, although clearly there is a thread of desire running beneath the interactions depicted ao3 link here

He doesn’t need the aether core in his eye to know how you're feeling. He can see it in the way your lovely jaw is locked tight, teeth clenched behind soft lips twisted into a tight line. The shudder you’re trying and failing spectacularly to repress, desperate to conceal your weakness: the fact that almost as much as you fear him, you hate him.

Almost from the very beginning, things have been going sideways for Sylus. First, that imbecile having the hubris to believe he could just pilfer what had clearly been claimed as belonging to Onychinus.

Second, the palpable fear that had juddered through you as he had graciously relieved the larcenist of the burden of his pathetic life, only for that fear to flare into bright, barely controlled hate once you figured out that using yourself as bait had succeeded in reeling in the largest predator in the N109 zone.

Third, even when he sauntered close to you, allowing you to drink your fill of his face, no other spark of recognition fired besides that of the leader of the most powerful criminal organization in the region. You didn’t recognize him personally at all, even as he hungrily mapped your face with his eyes and felt the bottomless well of want deepen even further in his heartless chest.

You didn’t remember a fucking thing. And for some reason, you hated him more than his worst enemies. And he had quite a large body count in the worst enemy column of the ledger of his existence.

The fear, he can understand. Onychinus is on the Hunter Association’s Naughty List, and you’re one of the Association’s true believers, a jewel in the hilt of their blade composed of naïve warriors. And like the noble, naïve creature he knows you to be, you firmly believe that any intel they fed you about him and his organization was the pure, unfiltered truth.

But the hate? He muses as he looks down into your upturned face, a face that has been carved into his dreams for weeks now, ever since Mephisto had reported back after scouting the Flux Nexus in the no-hunt zone. Ever since the night he finally found you, stumbling around and battling at the side of your sleepy, cunning rabbit of a partner in the dark wood, oblivious to the real danger perched amongst the leaves, watching through mechanical eyes. His lips twitch in an ironic smile, as he knows he should be grateful to the rabbit for the fact that you’re in front of him now, so agonizingly close. He can see the rise and fall of your chest. The breath you exhale, for him to inhale. All he has to do is let his hand do what it wants—reach out, fingertips drifting softly along the curve of your cheek, your throat, the pulse point that betrays your racing heart. You’re close enough that he could swallow you whole. A good man might be grateful, but he isn’t a good man, and he doesn’t have it in him to be grateful; he only catalogues the threat, and tucks away the thought of the light evolver to be a problem to contemplate, and solve, another day. Right now, he needs to solve the problem of why you hate him on a level that professional distaste can’t explain. The hate he sees in your bright, sharp eyes is personal.

Consequently, he might not need the aether core in his eye to know that you hate him, but he sure as hell needs it to figure out why.

He knows he should wait to use his power on you. He knows that strategically, the best play here is to move slowly, to rebuild your trust, to tease out what he wants from you, to prove to you that despite every instinct that the Association has indoctrinated in you, he is not a threat to you and never will be. He knows all too well that one can’t force trust and forge an equal relationship from coercion, but he doesn’t have the time. Not with the entire Nest on the hunt for his Prey tonight, not with his own house in chaos with Sherman running amok and running up the bill on collateral damage. He needs to know why you hate him so that he can deal with it now, all of it. To borrow the vocabulary of another one of your hapless suitors: now is the time for triage, and after he has assessed the carnage, then he will begin suturing the aftermath. Sylus may be a businessman, but he can appreciate a surgeon’s precision in approaching a crisis. Even if Sylus can’t appreciate the iceman himself, if only for the lingering looks the doctor indulges in when his patient is looking the other way. Sylus files this problem away, like the other, to be solved in quiet solitude another day.

So he indulges in a lingering look of his own, fingers twitching with the need to touch where they’re deceptively, casually resting on his hips. And then: Sylus lets himself look. He can feel the familiar warmth increase within his eye socket, the ember beginning to glow hotter and hotter, until it’s almost unbearable, and then truly unbearable, as it is every time, the price he must pay so that he may see.

A little silver apple on a chain.

A pair of smiling eyes.

An old woman’s hand placing a dumpling on a plate.

The relief of realizing that the danger has dissipated, and dinner is still waiting.

A strong, broad back, shoulders shaking with laughter as a door swings shut.

Almost from the very beginning, things have gone sideways for Sylus. He shuts his eyes, feels the heat and the pressure fade like grief with time, as the power in his aether core goes dormant once again. But you haven’t had time, have you? It’s still fresh, the wound still hemorrhaging. You think that he caused this. You’ve been bleeding for months, thinking it was his hand that wielded the knife lodged in your heart. Or rather, detonated the bomb that incinerated the only family you’ve ever known, leaving a smoking crater where your heart used to be.

Sylus’s mind races, compiling this new information, archiving the whys and hows, constructing and reconstructing his carefully assembled plans and all of the contingencies in between, laughing derisively at himself for not seeing this possibility coming. Sideways is an understatement. Things are well and truly fucked, Sylus thinks, looking into your lovely, livid face.

For a moment, an unfamiliar sensation drifts through his chest. He tests it gingerly, letting it cascade through him before he can identify it: despair. After all this time. Every year, month, week, day, second, breath, he has been carving a path towards you, littered with the broken dreams and broken bodies of others, and now he has finally found you, and what should have been his greatest victory (the spoils? His fingertips drifting up your silken skin, his fingers entwined with yours, home), may have been his greatest loss—a loss that is for once, despite all of his crimes and all of the corpses at his feet, every terrible thing he has ever done, not his fault at all.

He savors this strange feeling for a few heartbeats, indulging in it, pressing into it like a bruise, if bruises would actually remain under his skin. And then he discards it: the unexpected rarely obstructs his carefully laid plans, but nothing about you has ever been expected, has it? If he were the kind of man to resign himself to unexpected loss, like the other men clumsily flitting around you, he’d have been a dead trophy tossed at the feet of an enemy long ago. So the rules of the game have changed. So what? Sylus will adapt, because no matter his fucking luck, he is playing to win.

Because while gazing into the depths of your beloved eyes, Sylus not only saw the why of your hate, but the only thing that could soothe it. Something that you refuse to admit, even to your fundamentally honest self. Something you can’t admit, as you spend insomniac nights training until collapse, as you slice, maim, and end wanderer after wanderer, as you bare your teeth a little too savagely as blood spills beneath your fist and blade. You need vengeance. You need someone to hurt as much as you’re hurting. And not just anyone—the wanderers and criminals that you’ve trained your fists and pistols and blade on do not satisfy the blood-thirst burning through your veins. You need to punish the person responsible for the inferno in your chest. Maybe then you’ll be able to sleep again. Maybe then you’ll be able to not smile again, but at least retract the fangs that have been frightening the people around you for months now. The fangs you feared were always there, underneath the careful façade of the well-adjusted, law-abiding, healthy paragon of a hunter you’ve built to keep the nightmares at bay for years, to show your colleagues, your partner, your doctor and your superiors: Look, I’m harmless and righteous, the perfect tool, love me, love me, love me, please do not leave like everyone else I've ever loved.

And Sylus? Sylus has always, and will always, endeavor to give you everything your damaged heart could possibly desire. He knows that you will not believe that he was not the one who ripped your ‘family’ apart. And he knows that it will take time, time that he does not currently have, to rebuild what has been lost between the two of you. He recalibrates, sweeps aside the despair, and reinforces his resolve. If you want to exact vengeance on the person you think is responsible for all of your indescribable pain, Sylus will give his heart to you on a bloody platter, regardless of the pain it will cost him.

You need someone to hate right now to stay strong? So be it. He will be that for you, until he can locate the actual culprit. As he reaches out, ever so gently trailing the backs of his fingers along your hauntingly lovely face, he tells himself for a moment that he can't bring himself to use something so impersonal as the energy of his evol on you. But who is he kidding--Sylus is many things, but a liar is not one of them. He admits to himself that this is just him finally giving into his deepest desire, as he lets his hand drift from your face to the side of your neck, closing around your throat and lifting. He does not want to handle your precious form with such brute, concise strength, but he needs to hurry, he needs answers and he needs to fix this, now now now and you need him to be the enemy. This is what is best for you at this moment, in this place, and he only ever wants what is best for you, so he plays the part you need him to play:

"From your past to your future...to even all the crimes you'll inevitably commit. After all, you and I...we're the same. True kindred spirits."

As your body goes limp from his chokehold on you, he catches you, cradling your head in his hand, grateful for the strength of his body, the shelter he can provide you as he lifts you in his arms, holds you tightly, your chests finally close again, yours too full of a maimed heart and his missing one entirely, complementing each other, completing each other, even though you’re out cold and it will take so much—too much, too much, it’s already been too much time, you’re finally here, you’re finally in his arms, where you should have been all along—time to be able to have you in his arms like this but with your eyes wide open and fixed on his.

Later, when you wake up, in a dark room with this familiar stranger disdainfully staring you down through crimson eyes, as his evol winds itself around you, as it jerks you onto his big lap, you clench your teeth, you fight the tears of frustration and fury—why do you always cry when you’re angry? Is it not humiliating enough to lose control of the leash on your emotions, without tears spilling down your face to betray you to the object of your rage?­—and you fight desperately against the immovable force pinning you in place.

"I want to kill you myself," you grit out, through the tears and the snot running down your face.

And then this man places your gun in your hand, eyes bright as blood never leaving yours, in answer to the quietest, deepest buried desire of your limping heart that he has driven you to saying out loud. Your hate flares, because how dare he expose you to yourself in this manner? Who does this motherfucker think he is, casually extracting from your own mouth and offering you that which you couldn’t before name in hushed whispers, as if it means nothing to him, as if it costs him nothing, his sharp jaw relaxed, a ghost of a smirk curling the edges of his wide mouth? You fight it, the surge of hunger that chokes your panting breath—you fight it so hard, you’ve been fighting it for so long, ever since the piercing ringing in your ears began to sound that replaced your grandmother’s and Caleb’s laughter, the ringing silence that followed as debris rained down on your useless, injured body. You are not a mindless animal. You will not give in to this voracious want. You and this man holding your gun to his own heart are not the same, and never will be.

“Do you need some help? Yes? No? Maybe so?” His voice is the purr of a jungle cat, his hand, large and just as calloused as yours, envelops your own, with that same bizarre gentleness that you can’t even begin to interpret the why of, his finger drifting along your own, until it slowly tightens over yours. Your mouth says “No,” and you see how his eyes dart from yours to your lips and back again, but the hunger inside you howls as this man presses your finger against the trigger and the sound of the bullet leaving your gun drowns out all of the other noise in the cacophony of your thundering heart.

His big body jerks back, head hitting with a painful sounding thump against his melodramatic throne (ok, so it's just an antique chair, but honestly, where do villains buy ridiculous props like this?), and for an endless moment in time, the hunger is satiated, and a sense of triumphant relief courses through you instead. And then your vision sharpens, as blood the color of this man’s eyes begins to pour through the hole he—and you, we, together—just shot into his fucking heart.

He jerks the gun from your grasp and tosses it with a loud clatter to the concrete floor.

“You—Are you fucking crazy?” You’re moving before you realize it, palms pressed over his heart (a spiteful part of you hopes that it hurts him, even as you are suddenly overwhelmed with the terror that he is actually going to die, before you get any answers, before you get any help, before you’ve accomplished anything at all).

“You wanted to take my life,” he pants. It never hurts any less, no matter how many times it happens. He can feel his flesh knitting back together already, each stitch as painful as the one before. “And so you’ve taken it.”

Despite the pain, Sylus watches you leisurely, drinking in the blood splatters across your lovely neck and chin. My blood, he thinks with satisfaction. He wants to soak you in it. He wants to watch you bathe in it. He shakes his head, tucking that urge away for later contemplation. He is finally in the position to do what he has been craving for so, so long. He has given you what you want. Of course he will always give you what you want. However, that doesn’t mean that he can’t simultaneously get what he wants—Sylus strongly prefers deals when they’re win-win. He has given you what you wanted, and the slate is now clean. Now, it is time to begin negotiation of the highest stakes deal of his life: the acquisition of your body, heart and soul. Back at his side, where you belong.

“Now what? Have you already figured out how you’ll pay me back?”

[deathbxnny]

hello hello! platonic blade, aventurine and dr ratio with a severely chronically ill teen!reader? like they are prone to passing out and vomiting, and are often bedridden

Sorry for taking so long for this, anon, and thank you for the request!! I hope you'll like this!!<33

Content: Mentions of an unnamed chronical illness, non-descriptive vomiting, blood, angst, teen reader, platonic relationships, sfw

Reader has no set pronouns!!

((Not fully proofread))

》DR. VERITAS RATIO

Ratio tries his best to be strong and stern in the face of the inevitable and progressing sickness that was destroying your young body unfairly. It drove him near insane that he couldn't find a long-term cure for it, despite his high intelligence. And so, he simply focused on your comfort instead.

He tries to make your life as easy and accessible as possible. Ratio knows how important it is for you to still be able to do some kid things whilst you still can and therefore attempts to give you those possibilities whenever he can. He's glad that he can use his intelligence to create solutions for anything you want to do but may not be able to on your own.

Despite not looking like it, he doesn't mind staying up with you whenever your sickness is truly killing you on bad days. He has a hard time looking at you when you're suffering, but does his best to be reassuring and calming, even when he finds that difficult. He's used to simply giving solutions and facts to problems. But even so, he'll be right there for you when you need him, no matter how bad things get.

》AVENTURINE

Your suffering kills him on the inside. It really does. He can't bear knowing that you were suffering so immensely without him being able to do anything about it. And despite how much it destroyed him emotionally, he never let his smile slip around you. He knew how important it was that you knew you could rely on him fully without being afraid or ashamed.

Aventurine is glad that he has all the money needed to take care of you perfectly on his own. He spoils you greatly. No matter what it is you want or need, he'll give it to you with no further questions as long as it makes you smile. He sees himself in you in a way and wants to make sure that you have a much happier childhood than he ever did, despite your unfortunate circumstances.

He also practically hires every doctor in the universe to see if there is a way to find a cure anyway. He won't give up on you and could easily bet his life on the fact that he WILL find one. It doesn't matter how much it takes or how long and hard he'll have to work for it. You will lead a healthy and happy life even if he suffers for it.

》BLADE

Despite what people may think, he understands and respects your chronical illness due to Firefly. And whilst your sickness isn't necessarily the same, the pain and suffering you both go through was alike. This made it easier for him to handle it, especially as he didn't let the discomfort he felt during your harder days ever show on him. He doesn't mind if you have to depend on him fully for most things, even if he'll never say it outloud. His actions say enough.

With that said, he does his best to keep you out of the Stellaron Hunters business whenever you can barely stand. The job is challenging as it is for a kid your age, and he therefore will not so rudely tell you to stay in bed and rest. Kafka teases him for caring so much for you, which he denies and simply states that you were needed for the team... but he, too, knew it was a lie. It was clear when he brought you small trinkets or food that he thought you may like. It may not be much, but it's enough for you to smile even on bad days.

His condition is also seemingly incurable, so perhaps he relates to you in some ways, which makes you two bond greatly over it. And whilst there may be no cure for him except for death, he'll attempt to find you one so you can continue living on for him. He considers that fair.

[yyunari]

CHESHIRE ! — Nishimura Riki

SYNOPSIS. Y/N Cheshire lived her life carefree. Being the daughter of the Cheshire Cat made her more inclined to not take anything seriously and to just have a little bit of fun in everything she does. Whether it was pulling pranks, sneaking up on people, or making jabs at her friends- Y/N kept a Cheshire’s smile on her face. Because of that, she just couldn’t take Chaehyun Cupid seriously when she claimed that Y/N had a crush on Riki Wonderland.

PLAYLIST. listen to cheshire’s soundtrack while reading!

PAIRING. Kitty Cheshire! Y/N × Alistair Wonderland! Riki

(not shipping kitty and alistair !)

GENRE. Ever After High AU, High school AU, Fluff, Slight Angst

WARNINGS. bad parental relationship, ooc riki, angst

WORD COUNT. around 18k

NOTES. ITS OUT!!! i’ve been working on this fic for months and i finally finished it😭😭💗 thank u @muhwaa my best friend my soulmate for life and my twin flame for motivating me to finish it <3 this is my first long fic so i hope i did it well !!!

1. Naps and feathers don’t mesh.

The lights around her felt brighter than usual, though Liz Lockes found herself in the starlight once again. It wasn’t that she was complaining- in fact, she rather enjoyed it. She felt a sense of solitude as the rest of the world seemed to fade as nothing else mattered.

Liz didn’t mean to fall asleep in the Enchanted Forest. While being in the forest didn’t freak her out much, as the Daughter of Goldilocks, it still felt like an absurd place to sleep. But she had an episode for her MirrorCast news show featuring some of the pixies that reside in the forest, and all the preparation along with the actual filming had made her rather sleepy. She thought that it wouldn’t be too harmful if she took a little rest by a tree. That rest turned into an hour long nap and although it was an accident, the nap had felt just right. Though, it wasn’t just right when she was awoken by a feather being wiggled above her sensitive nose.

How was that possible? She couldn’t see anyone actually holding the feather- was it some sort of a spell?

Liz felt her nose twitch ever so slightly before she finally sneezed. This caused the feather to fall onto her face, before she threw it onto the ground next to her. Barely awake, Liz didn’t feel it in herself to question what had just happened, so she stood up from the spot where she took her impromptu nap and began to leave the forest.

As she made it near the front, however, she spotted Y/N Cheshire curled up on the branch of a tree playing with a ball of yarn.

What was Y/N doing in the forest so late? Weird.

Liz found herself quite fond of the Cheshire Cat’s daughter and decided to make some conversation.

“Hey Y/N!” Liz waved. “What are you doing here?”

Y/N, who gazed at Liz with her cat-like eyes and unsettling smirk, let out a giggle. “Oh, I’m about to take a small catnap.”

A nap? At 9 P.M?

Liz thought it was interesting how alike Y/N was with her mother. Although most Ever After High students found themselves copying the mannerisms of their parents, there were the bunch that preferred not to follow their destinies and created personalities and hobbies for themselves. The latter, known as the Rebels, was a category that mostly students destined for evil or misfortune chose to fall into. But really, Rebels were just anyone who refused to follow their storybook ending. As someone who has a relatively simple destiny, it made sense for Y/N to be keen on following hers.

The blonde snapped out of her thoughts and turned back to Y/N. “That’s funny, I was just leaving from taking a nap of my own! Do you sleep in the forest often?”

“You could say that,” Y/N threw her ball of yarn onto the ground. “I enjoy coming here at night. The stars are really pretty, aren’t they Liz?”

Liz smiled. “They are! Especially in the forest, they just look so stunning.”

“You should come here more often then, I’m sure we’ll get along just right.”

Liz raised an eyebrow at the suspicious tone she had in her voice. Of course, it was known that Y/N enjoyed pulling pranks in her free time… and even when she was busy. Liz had even covered Y/N in one of her MirrorCast episodes.

That was slightly difficult, considering how evasive the girl was. But being the star reporter of Ever After High, Liz prided herself in her ability to make a story out of anything. Even when the subject was hard to work with.

Before she could ask any questions, she realized what Y/N had meant as she observed the girl take a feather out of her pocket.

The same kind of feather that had woken up Liz from her nap.

Really, there was no stopping her mischievous feats. Y/N acted on her own accord, convinced by no one but her mother. There truly was nothing she took seriously in life. The cat girl lived her life treating everything as if it were nothing, so it was only natural that how people felt about pranks wouldn’t affect her, Liz assumed at least. She brushed it all off and waved Y/N a goodbye.

After all, it wasn’t that serious to begin with.

୨:୧┈┈┈ · · ┈┈┈୨:୧

2. Cupid knows best.

“Hey Y/N, why do you always prank Riki?”

Y/N felt herself let out a snicker as her friend, Chaehyun Cupid, daughter of Eros, asked her a question. It was a silly one, really.

“What do you mean? I prank everyone- it’s kind of my thing.” Y/N pointed to the small cat hat that rested on her head.

Being the daughter of the Cheshire Cat, Y/N felt lots of pride in fulfilling her destiny. As such, she turned pranking people constantly into her niche. Riki Wonderland, son of Alice, was no different.

Chaehyun just rolled her eyes, leaning against Y/N’s locker. “You’ve pranked him 8 times this week already! There’s tons of people in this school so why are you targeting him specifically?”

Ningning Swan, daughter of The Swan Queen, pursed her lips. “Chae is right, you know? You’ve been pranking Riki too much recently. According to Beomgyu he’s getting pretty tired of it.”

Beomgyu Hood, son of Robin Hood, was Riki’s roommate. So if he claimed that Riki was getting annoyed then it was probably the truth.

But Y/N didn’t care much for what they were saying. Why should it matter if he feels burdened by her pranks or not? They were only in good fun, after all! She only pulled silly, lighthearted pranks. Y/N didn’t see the issue in that.

“Hey, why so serious guys?” Y/N put on her signature Cheshire smile. “I’m just here to have a good time. Whether or not I prank Riki most of the time is none of your business. Plus, Beomgyu is an idiot who lives in the woods and plays music for a living. His destiny is to be a thief. I wouldn’t trust anything that guy says.”

Ningning gave a soft smile. “He’s not that bad. He’ll be a thief who gives to the poor.”

Chaehyun turned to the swan girl with a knowing look, as the latter brushed it off and continued.

“As your closest friends, it is our business.” Ningning stated.

Y/N giggled, her movements laced with insincerity. “You’re my only friends.”

“Still makes us your closest! And don’t forget you have your Wonderland friends, Y/N.”

At that, Y/N shrugged, still adorning her wide and mischievous grin. It was true that Y/N didn’t have many friends. Naturally as someone who seeks chaos and disharmony in all she does, it was fit that people didn’t bother to get to know her. Being a rather secretive person, Y/N didn’t find herself too bothered by it (as she liked to convince herself). However, she was rather close with the other Ever After High students from Wonderland. Soul Hatter, son of the Mad Hatter, Giselle Hearts, daughter of the Queen of Hearts, and Rei Blanc, daughter of the White Rabbit. They all grew up together and were each other’s closest friends in childhood. The only other student missing from that list was Riki.

There was never a specific reason as to why the two never got close. Perhaps Riki disliked Y/N. Perhaps his mother had told him to avoid Y/N and her staple chaos. Perhaps Y/N had been subconsciously avoiding him. Whatever it was, Y/N and Riki remained civil with one another but never became friends.

There was, however, one instance that made Y/N feel slightly closer to the boy. One night that they had spent together… had he forgotten? She tried not to think much of it and figured he didn’t think about it either.

All the more reason as to why pranking him often wasn’t a big deal. They weren’t friends (as far as she was concerned) and were barely acquainted with one another past the basis of where they lived- so why was Chaehyun suddenly questioning it?

The bell rang, alerting students to get to their next classes.

“Y/N, you totally like Riki!” Chaehyun suddenly squealed. “I can see it in your eyes when you talk about him. You like him. Pranking him more often than others just means you’re deflecting your real feelings by acting like you don’t care about him. It’s very common when people have crushes.”

The thought made Y/N burst out into laughter. After all, come on. Her? Having romantic feelings for Riki? The same boy who peed his pants the first time they went from Wonderland to Ever After? Not a chance. She could care less for the cute blush on his face afterwards, or the way he laughed it off and acted like it wasn’t a big deal (it was, he had to run into a random house in the woods to clean himself up and that’s where he met Beomgyu). She would never admit that she only knew that because she had turned herself invisible and followed him. Y/N could say for sure that she found none of that appealing. Nothing about him in the slightest.

Even the notion that Y/N would have romantic interest for anyone was absurd.

But as an avid enjoyer of all that is lawless, Y/N just shrugged with a nonchalant expression. She wasn’t one to express herself. “I could tell you, but…” She trailed off in a fake train of thought before continuing. “Where’s the fun in that? Chaos is keeping people guessing, and that makes this kitty purr~”

Her friends deadpanned at her nonspecific phrasing. It was rather hard to get anything out of the shielded girl who embodied certain traits of a cat. Of course she acted as her own person and didn’t rely on her background or her mother to force her one way, but that was just the thing. She was only raised in that way so perhaps it was all she knew best.

Chaehyun smiled, knowing well that Y/N was in a state of denial. It held up- Y/N wasn’t the open type. Cats are feisty, after all. “Sweetie, I’m the daughter of Cupid. I think I know a thing or two about love- and most things in general.” All she needs is a little push.

Y/N smirked. “Most things, really? Because Yujin Hood is a wolf like her father but so far I’m the only one who’s seemed to notice.” Yujin Hood, daughter of Little Red Riding Hood. “It’s funny because she’s really obvious about it but somehow no one has caught on. I mean, why does everyone think she acts so shady and disappears often? She’s obviously hiding a secret.”

The two girls gasped at the news. Really? The thought of Yujin being a wolf felt so… bizarre. But it definitely explained her weird habits. “That’s cheating! You can teleport and turn invisible. You spy on people all the time.” Ningning said.

“You’re right, I can! Speaking of which… Headmaster Grimm is coming this way so I’m going to head to Home Evilnomics before Baba Yaga notices I’m not there. Toodles!” Y/N waved to her friends and let her mouth spread into her Cheshire smile, before her body vanished into thin air- the last thing Ningning and Chaehyun saw of her was that damn smile as it hovered in thin air and lingered ever so slightly longer than the rest of her body.

“Why aren’t you two heading to class?” The familiar voice of the headmaster made the two girls shudder. That man truly had a terrifying aura. “Hurry along, don’t want to keep your professors waiting.”

Deep down they wished they had Y/N’s teleportation ability.

୨:୧┈┈┈ · · ┈┈┈୨:୧

3. Riki’s mixed feelings.

Riki couldn’t figure out why Y/N seemed to hate him.

It wasn’t as if he’d done anything to her, right? In fact when they were children, he considered her as a friend. Sure they didn’t speak to one another much, but every Wonderlandian was considered his friend. After that night they had spent together back in Wonderland, he figured they at least had an understanding of each other.

He had even found her pranks and unserious personality to be endearing!

That was, until she had made him the target of her pranks. Constantly.

Y/N didn’t prank him much when they were younger. It was only when they started attending Ever After High that the pranks would amp up and become more of a frequent thing. They first began small- switching out his shampoo for hair dye, throwing ice cream at his face on a roller coaster, replacing his croquet ball with yarn, etc. All pretty juvenile stuff. He didn’t mind it and honestly found it funny.

But even Riki had to admit that getting pranked more than twice each week was overkill! It got to a point where he would leave classes and try to go under the radar, in hopes that he could avoid Y/N at all costs. Though, it didn’t help that they had a lot of the same friends. So when his best friend, Soul Hatter, would attempt to get her attention, Riki would groan internally as her cat eyes found their way to his form.

However, nothing gets past the Mad Hatter’s son so he asked Riki about it one day- while the two were hanging out at the Mad Hatter’s tea shop in the Village of Book End.

All sorts of typical Wonderland madness went on in the tea shop, such as teacups being used for the shop’s outdoor design, clocks that tell the wrong time, portals, and objects that float on occasion. It all made Riki miss Wonderland more and more each time he went.

A squeal could be heard from inside the shop as the tables began to float. An unassuming Bahiyyih Charming feared for her life as she felt her feet lift off from the ground. Though for Riki and Soul, they were used to it so they proceeded with their conversation. “I just feel like she hates me! There’s no way you can prank someone that often without feeling negative feelings towards them.” Riki stated with a downcast look on his face.

Soul took a sip of his favorite Earl Grey tea before responding. “More like there’s no way she hates you. I don’t think Y/N hates anyone, in fact, she’s a rather peaceful person.”

At that, Riki raised an eyebrow. “Really? The Cheshire Cat’s daughter is peaceful?”

“Well she does love discord, but she cares a lot for her friends, even if she has trouble showing it. I would know- I’m actually friends with her.” Soul said.

Suddenly, a top hat appeared next to their table.

“Dad? Is that you?”

A boisterous laugh was heard as the Mad Hatter popped out from inside of the hat.

Soul beamed at his dad and the two did their handshake, which they had made back when Soul was a toddler. “Whistle, cradle, up top, down, sideways-“ Riki just smiled at this and waited for them to finish.

“-and to the moon! To what do I owe the pleasure of seeing you two today?” The Mad Hatter asked, as he poured himself a cup of tea.

“We were just talking about how Riki thinks Y/N hates him.” Soul elbowed his best friend in a teasing manner.

The older man tapped his finger on his chin in thought. “Y/N? Well that girl could hardly hate anyone! I’d find that very hard to believe.” Soul gave Riki a knowing ‘I told you so’ look.

“So then why is she always pranking me?”

The Mad Hatter gave him a pat on the shoulder. “Perhaps it’s her love language.”

“Love language? She’s not really close with anyone besides the other Wonderland kids.. and Ningning… and Chaehyun.” Riki spoke, as he recounted Y/N’s friends. It wasn’t very hard.

Before his question could be answered, a ring from the bell at the counter alerted the Mad Hatter to get back to work. To which he did, but not before giving his son a new box of Earl Grey tea.

“Do you think she likes you?” Riki snapped his head to Soul because of what he said out of the blue. “Maybe Chaehyun would know something about it.”

It didn’t take a second thought for Riki to shake his head in disagreement. “No… no way. We’ve barely spoken, why would she like me?”

Soul shrugged. “I’m just throwing out ideas.”

“Well, your idea sucks. There’s no way Y/N could possibly like me.”

It just made no sense. After all, who would want to prank their crush? Wouldn’t it just make them avoid you more? The idea itself was baffling to Riki.

By the end of their hangout, Riki was sure of one thing. He would officially befriend Y/N.

That would surely get her off of his back.

But secretly he knew that he didn’t mind her pranks as much as he thought he did.

୨:୧┈┈┈ · · ┈┈┈୨:୧

4. Castleteria encounter and unwanted realizations.

It was lunchtime at Ever After High, and students of all different fairy tale backgrounds found themselves spending their down time together in the Castleteria. After Karina Queen, daughter of the Evil Queen, normalized people not wanting to follow their destinies, it became less taboo for Royals and Rebels to interact with one another. Headmaster Grimm was still hesitant on the idea, but that didn’t matter. All of the students agreed with one another that they would work on being less cliquey. Wonyoung White and Yujin Hood were seen laughing about something they were watching on the MirrorNet. But about two years ago, Snow White’s daughter and Little Red Riding Hood’s daughter would not have been together at all.

Chaehyun, Ningning, Y/N, and Sullyoon Ella were eating together that day. Y/N wasn’t typically friends with Cinderella’s daughter, but she found her incredibly attractive and alluring to be around. Sullyoon had just finished showing them her new shoe collection when Chaehyun pulled out a book and flipped to a page that was titled-

“True Hearts Day?” Ningning asked, with an eyebrow raised. “What’s that?”

Chaehyun giggled in excitement. “It’s an old holiday where people spellebrated following their hearts! Isn’t it so cool? I’m going to throw a True Hearts Day dance! As a future Cupid, I need to uphold traditions such as these.”

“And Headmaster Grimm just let you?” Sullyoon asked. “He’s not the biggest fan of people following their hearts.”

Chaehyun bit her lip. She wasn’t quite sure how her friends would react to the news but she wanted them to know first. “That’s the thing- he didn’t. I asked him last night and he shut down the idea.”

The three other girls waited for her to continue, as she took a pause to gain courage. “Which means I’m going to do it in secret!”

“And just how would you do that?” Y/N asked, as she flicked food from her spoon in Jay Huntsman’s face. The son of the Huntsman gasped in part annoyance and part shock, before proceeding to speak to the Charmings. Y/N snickered at his disgusted expression. Gotcha.

Chaehyun pulled up a map on her MirrorPhone. It displayed all of the Fairy Tale World, from Never After to the Mirror Realm. She zoomed in on the Enchanted Forest, and pointed at a random spot in the woods. “There’s a place here that I know would work perfectly! I just have to make all the invites, plan what food will be served, set up all the decorations- oh! and I have to make the music mix.”

“Are you sure you don’t need help?” Sullyoon made a sheepish expression as she realized Chaehyun had taken up a lot on her plate, perhaps more than she realized. “I run a shoe store so I’m pretty good at managing.”

It was true, Sullyoon ran a shoe store in the Village of Book End. The Glass Slipper Shoe Store is what she had named the place, and it was a nice store with various kinds of shoes (it was really just heels, but there were many different kinds of heels).

Needing all the help she could get, Chaehyun nodded. “Do you mind handling the decorations? I’ll do everything else.”

Y/N listened silently as the girls began discussing their plans for the True Hearts Day Dance. She considered helping her friends, as she did care a great deal about them, but she wasn’t exactly good at being helpful. It was much easier for her to mess things up rather than fix them.

However she found herself bored by the topic, so she scanned the room to see who she could pull a prank on next.

Yuna Rose? Oh no, she’s fallen asleep again. What about Jake? He’s the best Charming to prank- never mind, he’s talking to Karina. Maybe…

Y/N glanced towards Riki, who she could see leaving the Castleteria. A grin widened across her face as she let her body disappear from her spot on the table- the grin once again being the last part of her to disappear.

Riki, who was frantically walking back to Professor Rumplestiltskin’s classroom in order to turn his paper in on time, tripped over what seemed to be thin air.

But it wasn’t, and that was clear when Y/N suddenly appeared next to him.

“Seriously? Again?” Riki asked, though his tone was slightly playful. He didn’t want to cause an argument- despite the fact that he was feeling slightly annoyed.

He wasn’t too fond of being pranked all the time. But Riki couldn’t blame the girl too much, she was just doing what she had always done. That much he understood about her, having grown up together.

“This is like, the 4th time this week.” Hopefully she could pick up the hints.

“Hey, I had to! The opportunity was just purrfect.” Y/N made a clawing motion as she said that. “You’re not butthurt, are you?”

Riki found himself chuckling at that. She was really funny, that was one of her features that interested him. Not that he was interested in her, but rather sometimes he found his eyes wandering in her direction he found her intriguing. Besides what she portrayed on the outside, what did anyone really know about Y/N Cheshire? Nothing, truly. The more he thought about it the more he wanted to know. “No, I could never. You’re really funny, you know that?”

Y/N’s face faltered for a second, but it was barely noticeable before she held her carefree expression once again.

“Don’t you have a paper to turn in? We wouldn’t want Rumplestiltskin to mark you down.”

“Oh yeah, I should probably go…”

“Catch you later, Wonderland.” Y/N teased, before disappearing once again.

Riki looked down on the essay in his hands before he snapped out of it and went back to turning it in.

Meanwhile, Y/N found herself back on the branch of her favorite tree in the forest. It was the place she would go to when she needed some time for herself.

And time for herself was needed after what had just happened.

Pranking Riki was something she figured wasn’t a big departure from her normal everyday life. She often crossed his path, so it made sense as to why she would choose him as a target. It wasn’t as though she was seeking him out on purpose, or waiting for him to pass by her locker so she could see his adorable expression. Or hear his voice, which she often heard in her dreams. In fact, it was so unlikely to happen that it didn’t. Y/N could barely even recall what his voice sounded like- that’s how uninterested she was in him. She didn’t even remember his name.

Yes, Y/N could care less about Riki. He was barely a thought that crossed her mind. A small, singular speck of an idea that didn’t hold any substance or weight in her world. She couldn’t waste her time with silly little things like love- after all, how could someone like her be worthy of being loved? All she knew how to do was ruin people’s days.

How could she even like him? Y/N barely even knew the boy. All she really knew was that his birthday was on December 9th, his roommate is Beomgyu, he loves riddles, and misses Wonderland, a lot.

Though, she couldn’t forget his tendency to be overly curious like his mother Alice. Or that he started a chess club with Rei due to his smart nature! Or even his eyes that seemed to glisten with a deep passion every time Y/N would look into them. His pink, plump lips that seemed too soft to be real…

Maybe she knew more than she let on.

But that didn’t mean she liked him! It was only because of her observant nature, and the fact that she can easily turn invisible. That makes it easy to people-watch.

Riki wasn’t even worth watching. So really, he was just obvious about everything. Because how else could Y/N know all those facts about him when she didn’t like him at all?

Y/N pulled out a ball of yarn to crochet and get her mind out of the gutter. Her shaking hands picked up the hook- wait, why were her hands shaking?

It was then when she finally felt the warm blush on her cheeks, which she just realized had been sitting on her face since the Castleteria.

Could she be sick?

No, it was something entirely different. Y/N realized it all now.

Each encounter with Riki left her redder than Yujin’s cloak, and her heart racing slightly faster than normal. It was so simple to see, but she had been in denial for so long.

Y/N had a crush on Riki.

Despite the realization, the idea made her feel weirded out. How could she let that happen?! Ever After High wasn’t the place to fall in love. With the majority of the students following their destinies, it wasn’t a shock to discover that Riki would as well. But Y/N could never amount to what he was worth- she was just a side character in his fairy tale. After their storybook ending, he would leave Wonderland and remember all his adventures as a dream. Plus, falling in love was too serious and committing for Y/N. She couldn’t be serious about anything.

But as she spotted her beloved in a faraway distance, she decided to get closer. Inconspicuously, of course.

There he stood as the spring sun shone down on him as if he weren’t real. Riki was only conversing with Beomgyu after turning in his essay, but he seemed to be the most ethereal being Y/N had laid her eyes upon. At one point he had thrown his head back in laughter, which sounded akin to a melody of angels singing in Y/N’s eyes. Everything about him was purrfect.

In a way, maybe falling in love didn’t sound so bad.

୨:୧┈┈┈ · · ┈┈┈୨:୧

5. Staring. Again.

Scratch that, it was a horrible thing to happen. How could she act around Riki the same if she had found out it was because she liked him all along?!

For Y/N, it was just easier to brush her feelings aside and continue doing what was simplest. Despite her love for chaos, she never meant to be truly evil or cause any problems. It’s all done in good fun and everyone knew that. Something as problematic as love was an issue that she never expected she would encounter while attending Ever After High.

But she couldn’t help how she felt and therefore had to come to terms with it all.

“You’re staring… Again~”

Y/N turned around to see Chaehyun giggling at her with a teasing smirk. Although she didn’t specify what exactly Y/N was staring at, the cat girl knew what she was talking about- even if she didn’t realize she was staring until that point. But Y/N would never admit that Chaehyun was right. “Staring? At what?”

The future cupid girl pointed at the object of Y/N’s attention for the past few minutes- as much as she would deny it she knew it was true. “Your future boyfriend!”

“Boyfriend?” Y/N stifled a laugh. “No way, I was just thinking about how to prank him next.”

Chaehyun sighed. She knew Y/N was stubborn but she wasn’t aware of just how stubborn the girl could be. Anyone with eyes could tell that Y/N looked at Riki with nothing but love in her eyes- so why did she deny it?

Chaehyun had no doubt it had anything to do with her feelings on her destiny.

Her eyes flitted over to something behind Y/N for a split second before she looked back at her.

“Oh! That reminds me, I have to go set up some things for True Hearts Day. I’ll see you in class, yeah?” Y/N lazily waved at her friend and watched her walk off. Just as Chaehyun had left, Y/N felt a hesitant tap on her shoulder.

Not liking the idea of someone being behind her, she quickly evaporated and appeared once again right behind the person who had tapped her. It was Riki.

“Riki Wonderland?” Y/N had teleported so fast that Riki had heard her voice behind her before even seeing her disappear. “What, cat got your tongue?”

The boy rolled his eyes at her corny joke. “Very funny. I just wanted to give you these.” Y/N looked down at his hands and saw a freshly baked batch of cookies. Had he… made them for her himself? For some reason, the idea of Riki spending some of his own time in the kitchen baking cookies especially for her made her feel warm and fuzzy inside. “My mom sent me some from back home and I wanted to give them to the Wonderland kids…”

Oh, yeah that made sense. For a moment, it almost felt as though Riki cared about her. Y/N wasn’t sure why she let herself get her hopes up so easily- what was happening? The sight of Riki made her feel so… so giddy. Perhaps realizing her feelings wasn’t such a smart move after all. She found herself acting out of character and thinking all kinds of thoughts.

“Hello? Y/N?” Riki waved a hand to her face, which snapped her out of her thoughts. She could only hope that her attraction wasn’t obvious from her facials.

Y/N slowly grabbed a cookie from the plate. It was soft and warm- it felt like home. “Cookies, for me?” Her gaze moved its way upwards until it found itself on Riki’s face. “Are they poisoned or something?”

“Is it so hard to believe someone wants to do something nice for you?” Riki said jokingly as he sighed. Grabbing a cookie from the container, he took Y/N’s hand in his own and opened it up to place another cookie in her hand. “Just take it, Y/N. After all, we’re friends aren’t we?”

Just for a second, Y/N could feel her carefree facade fade into his presence. Friends? Had he really considered them friends all along? But just as quickly as it went, her guise had come back. “Are we, Wonderland? I don’t know if you knew this, but we never even talked to each other before this year.”

“Well, you never really seemed to be fond of me. For whatever reason that is, I like to think of it as water under the bridge.” Riki smiled. “After all, I’ve considered us friends ever since we were young. Even though we didn’t talk back then, I still feel that we gained an understanding of one another after that night we spent together. Don’t you remember?”

So… he does remember?

Just as Y/N was about to ask the reason as to why they never spoke often after that night, the night that had felt special to her, she stopped herself. She didn’t want to come off as overly curious, even if that was what she truly was.

And besides, she preferred not to hear him say that she was the problem all along.

Satisfied with their newfound status of friendship, Y/N gave him a smile. A genuine smile. Her first real one in such a while. “You flatter me, Wonderland. Hopefully my nature doesn’t make you change your mind.”

The boy nodded and gave her a smirk. “I’ve grown accustomed to how you are so whatever it is you think would drive me away is something I’ve mentally prepared for.”

Wanting to mess with him for a bit, Y/N stepped slightly closer to Riki. “Oh, really? You think too much of yourself and too little of me.”

Riki bent down while maintaining eye contact with the girl. His height was truly impressive. “I don’t think you’re as threatening or scary as you think you are.”

As besotted with the boy Y/N was, she didn’t take it lightly when people underestimated her. It was something her mother did often and something that she was tired of feeling used to.

Y/N knew very well how capable she was of more than what she let on. She just hadn’t utilized it yet.

So the cat girl found herself formulating a plan in her head to prove it all wrong.

After all, Y/N Cheshire was a rebel. Stubbornness and pride were her best virtues.

She quickly teleported behind Riki and whispered a ‘boo’ to startle him- and startled he was.

“And I don’t think you know as much about me as you think you do.”

“You’re staring, Riki.”

The son of Alice left his train of thoughts as his best friend snuck up behind him. It was a week after he had officially befriended Y/N and the boy found her on his mind quite often. His curiosity of her shone brighter after she had challenged him. Of course he knew it was all in good fun, and they had been talking more casually ever since that day. During classes, during passing periods, and occasionally he would sit with her during lunch. They discussed many topics, just about anything that crossed their minds at the time. The two found it easy to fall into step with one another.

Y/N even found herself calming her catty personality when she was with Riki. It was surprising, because she hadn’t even done that with Ningning or Chaehyun. Why did she act in such a way with a boy?

As much as she wanted to deny it, Y/N knew Riki was the last person she wanted to think badly of her. Because of that, she had slowly stopped doing the small, petty pranks on him. She figured that the more she did them, the more annoyed he would get with her. Y/N decided that the prank she was planning for him would be the last one she would do. Ever.

It begged the question, why had they postponed this friendship for so long? They definitely had a connection with one another and found it very simple to get along. Conversation came easily. It made no sense as to why it had taken 17 years to get to the point where they stood currently.

Riki knew it was something on both ends. He could tell that not just one party was to blame. Because he did make efforts to speak to her on occasion, but at the same time she did as well. It was just that when a conversation was started, the other would have trouble continuing it. Perhaps it was some sort of subconscious fear.

Whatever it was, that was all in the past. It was the current day and Y/N Cheshire and Riki Wonderland had become friends.

“Riki?”

The boy brought himself out of his thoughts once more as his best friend waved a hand in front of his face. “You zoned out again. Why do you keep staring at Y/N?“

That was the question Riki kept asking himself. “It’s not on purpose. At least, I don’t think. Maybe she just happens to be there.”

“You sound unsure.” Soul said in a thoughtful manner. The cogs in his head began to turn. “Maybe… Oh my gosh- do you like Y/N?”

The thought was baffling. “Like? Of course not! I just find her… interesting.”

“Right, that’s why you’re friends with her now. Because you find her interesting.” Soul teased. That was one thing that Riki disliked about his best friend, that he was so determined in his ideals that he had to see them through each time. “How did you even come to like her? She’s not exactly your type.”

“Well that’s just it I’m not sure how-“ Riki began, but then stopped once he realized what he was unconsciously admitting.

Soul smirked. “Go on.”

Riki let out a sigh and finally let his guard down. “I don’t really know how it started. My interest in her, that is. I’m not too sure if I would classify it as a crush or anything of that sort but I guess one day my eyes just started to drift in her direction?”

He sort of lied. Riki knew that it was because of that night when they were 11, ever since he noticed something different about her. When he listened to her talk, he could tell that she had some sort of sadness about her that she could never quite talk about.

It made him curious.

A wistful breath came out of Souls mouth. “How romantic. I love unlikely romances, they’re very interesting. I suppose it was about time you found someone you were interested in.” He patted a hand on his friends back in congratulations. “Are you going to do something about it?”

“No, definitely not. At least- not until I figure out if what I’m feeling is really romantic or just a friendly interest.”

Just as Soul was about to respond, someone tapped on Riki’s shoulder. “Hey!” They both turned around to be faced with Chaehyun.

“Okay so keep it hush, especially to Headmaster Grimm, but I’m setting up a dance to spellebrate True Hearts Day. Everyone’s invited!” Chaehyun handed them both envelopes. The envelopes were lathered in pink and had their names on it. “True Hearts Day was a holiday where people spellebrated following their true hearts desire, and Headmaster Grimm has banned us from even knowing about it.”

“That tracks. Ever since Karina did what she did last year, he’s been trying to silence us now more than ever.” Riki stated.

“Exactly. Which is why this dance is a secret from him and will be held in a location he doesn’t know about.” Chaehyun smiled. “Will you be there?”

“Of course!” Soul nudged Riki. “We’ll both go.”

A cheer emitted from Chaehyun’s throat before she went to pass out more invitations.

For Riki, he knew what he had to do before the dance. He would have to discover how he felt about Y/N.

Because if he had a crush, then he would ask her to go with him.

On the other side of the lockers, Y/N stared at the concoction in her hands. It was nothing less than ugly. But it was beautiful work, and ideas bloomed through her mind as she thought about what to do with it.

“And you’re doing this… to prove a point?” Ningning asked, as she recounted what Y/N had told her moments prior. “Isn’t that a bit… far?”

“It’s just a little prank! I’ve done far worse to him before.” Y/N rolled her eyes. “Besides, do I need a reason to prank someone? I’m the d-“

“-daughter of the Cheshire Cat, I know. But do you need to be so proud of it?”

Y/N raised an eyebrow. “What do you mean?”

Ningning sighed. “All I’m saying is… you could at least know when to draw the line.”

Y/N gave it a bit of a thought. Draw the line? It wasn’t that simple for her. Y/N was just doing what she had always done. No one had ever told her when to stop, and no one had ever told her how to behave otherwise. How could she ever know otherwise? And at the end of the day, it was all just for a good laugh!

Of course, she knew Ningning had a point. She wasn’t an idiot- she could tell that people weren’t too fond of her. Though they never stated it outright, Y/N knew that her fun had stained people’s impressions of her.

But it was all she was good for.

And besides, wouldn’t Riki laugh at a prank such as this? He always did get a chuckle out of her mischief. The idea of making him laugh with that infectious laugh of his burned through Y/N’s mind.

“I’ll draw the line when I want to draw the line.”

With that, Y/N disappeared- leaving Ningning to stare at the spot where she once stood and sigh.

This is going to take a lot of work… I’m going to need to-

“Hey Ning!”

Ningning looked behind her to see Chaehyun approaching with an armful of envelopes. “Have you seen Y/N? I need to give her one of the invitations as well but I haven’t seen her around all day.”

“You just missed her, but I can hold onto the envelope and give it to her when we’re together.” Ningning smiled at her friend who she had just noticed had a troubled expression on her face.

“Cool! While we’re together, I need to talk to you about something.”

“Me too. Can we talk somewhere private?”

“You read my mind.”

୨:୧┈┈┈ · · ┈┈┈୨:୧

6. He was a star, and she was anything but.

Y/N wished her mother didn’t call as often as she did.

The two were having one of their weekly calls through the MirrorPhone, and Y/N wasn’t sure if she could take one more second of her mother’s incessant nagging. Usually she could handle it, but for some reason she seemed to be more overbearing than usual.

And most of the time, she only called to see what pranks she was pulling and not to actually talk to her.

“You’re only pulling baby pranks, darling.” The Cheshire Cat spoke while filing her nails. “You should be able to do better. After all, this is all you’re good for anyways.”

This is all you’re good for.

It didn’t help her self worth when her own mother pressured her in that way.

Y/N sighed and bit her tongue. She couldn’t speak up to her mother, not when she was one of the only people she could trust. “But I can’t really do much when I’m at school, mother.”

The woman paused her nail filing to give her daughter a slight glare. “Then that means you’re not good enough.”

Y/N felt her words get choked up in her throat. “I’m trying my best!” Attempting to hold back tears, Y/N disliked how her mother spoke to her oftentimes. She figured she could handle it since it was her mother, but at some point it just became too much.

“Try harder sweetie.” The Cheshire Cat gave her a sickly sweet smile. “Be honest, is a boy distracting you?”

Yes.

“Of course not, mother.” Y/N stated.

Though, one thing she had forgotten about was her tendency to lick her lips a bit more than usual when she lied. And one thing her mother did right was notice the small things about her.

The Cheshire Cat gasped. “There is a boy!” She pondered on this idea for a second, examining her daughter through the MirrorPhone. She had made it a point to Y/N that boys would only get in the way and that romance shouldn’t be on her mind throughout high school, and she would stand by that point no matter what. But perhaps what her daughter needed was a push in the wrong direction. “Tell me, who is he? And how did it happen?”

Y/N knew she couldn’t lie anymore to her mother, so she decided to come clean. Despite their strained relationship, wouldn’t it feel nice to be able to discuss her feelings with someone?

Her mother was harsh and cruel, but she wasn’t a monster. Surely she would be able to help.

The only problem was that she didn’t know where to begin. After all, she didn’t even know where her feelings began. Was it that day by the front of the school where she realized she liked him? Or was there a time before then that she had caught feelings without even knowing? As someone who didn’t receive much love growing up and had never liked anyone else, it was hard to tell.

She thought back to all the times she had interacted with Riki. Perhaps there was a common denominator between each moment, one that could pinpoint a beginning.

It was then that she realized that there was a certain moment that stood in the back of her mind whenever Riki was around (or when she thought about him).

It was after a fight Y/N had with her mother when she was 11. At one point, she became too stressed with all the expectations the Cheshire Cat had on her, and certain feelings began to bubble up within her. It came to a stop when her and her mother had blown up on each other and things got too tense for Y/N to stay at home. Without her dad present, it was tough having to live with someone who both expected so much of you but also didn’t believe you were worth anything.

Due to her conflicting feelings, she ended up running out of the house in an attempt to find somewhere to calm down. Though in Wonderland, there weren’t many options. No matter where you went there was bound to be chaos.

So Y/N ran. She found herself running and running until she could find somewhere to sit peacefully and stay unbothered. It was just too much for her 11 year old brain to stay in such a place that fostered a toxic mindset.

And eventually, she found a spot. It was nearby the portal between Wonderland and Ever After, so perhaps part of that world was seeping into Wonderland. Whatever it was, she had found a hilltop so hidden from the rest of Wonderland that there was practically no noise. It was so high above the world that one wrong step and Y/N would be falling to her death. From where Y/N was curled up within the trees, she could see the stars.

Y/N loved stargazing. It was something that she couldn’t do often but loved doing while she could. With all the pressures from her mom and herself, something she could count on to be a constant was looking at the stars. The way the shimmer of the stars starkly contrasted the gloom of the night sky- she felt that she could easily get lost in its beauty. Not only were they beautiful, but there was something about the way the stars twinkled that made her want to shine just as brightly. Each star perfectly had its own place amongst the sky… could she be like that too? Was there somewhere she could have her own place in? In another world, Y/N was a star. She wanted to be able to contribute to a bigger picture, and not just be a side character in another’s story. Perhaps when she died, she could be reincarnated as a star. Was that even possible?

Until then she would stay down on the ground, waiting to take her place amongst the stars.

Y/N was so entranced by her own thoughts that she didn’t notice a figure slowly come into her view.

“Is there any more room up here?” The voice said.

Out of instinct, Y/N gasped and quickly disappeared. It was a defense mechanism that had become a habit when she learned to control her powers.

But as her vision started to focus once more and she reappeared, Y/N realized who it was.

Riki Wonderland.

Confused, she raised an eyebrow. “What are you doing here?”

“I could ask you the same thing. This is my spot.” He said in such confidence. “I found it years ago and I’ve been coming here to stargaze ever since.”

Riki stargazed? Y/N couldn’t see that as something befitting of his character.

“I just wanted to get out of the house, I guess.” Y/N shrugged. “So, you stargaze?”

“It’s just something I realized I enjoyed after the first time I did it.” Riki stated, a small smile placed upon his face that Y/N had never seen before.

Not wanting to be a nuisance, Y/N sat up. “Well if you’re here now, I might as well just leave. Have fun with your stars, Wonderland.”

Before Y/N could disappear, Riki grabbed her arm. “Wait,” the girl looked into his eyes as she decided to hear out what he had to say. “you should stay. It’s not like I own this place anyways.”

It wasn’t that she disliked Riki, and in all honesty she found him rather cute. But wouldn’t it be awkward if it was just the two of them? Y/N didn’t have an easy time socializing with people either way, but with Riki it would be even harder. It was awkward knowing that they were so close to being friends but it had never happened. But with the pleading look in his eyes, how could she say no?

There was something about him that made her soft.

Y/N sighed and slowly agreed. If Riki wanted her there, perhaps she should stay. So the two laid on opposite sides of the branch together, and silently looked up at a world they could only dream of being a part of.

After some time, Riki opened his mouth. “I know I already asked this earlier, but why did you come here? You know, to stargaze.” As if he wasn’t satisfied with her answer.

He was right in thinking that her answer wasn’t what she truly wanted to say, but it just felt awkward to give an exact reason. Her relationship with her mom was something she could barely tell her only 3 friends about, let alone someone she barely considered an acquaintance.

But Y/N knew Riki was a reliable guy; she had heard it often from Soul, Rei, and Giselle. And maybe for once she would let herself put faith into another person.

“I’ll only tell you if you tell me why you like stargazing.”

Riki blew out a breath in thought. “Hm… I don’t know if I can give an exact reason for that. I was just bored one day and ended up coming across this place. That’s what made me stargaze, but something about it just felt so comforting to me that I wanted to do it more often.” He answered, a soft smile gracing his lips. “But that’s not exactly a good reason.”

“I think it suits you.” Y/N whispered out. “I’m sure you have your own stresses with being the son of Alice in Wonderland. It would make sense that having a hobby like this to come back to is something you enjoy.”

He pondered on it for a moment. Maybe she was right. He then chuckled at this side of her he had never seen before. “You’re a lot more poetic than you let on. Anyways I answered your question, can you answer mine?”

Y/N considered answering it, she truly did, but as much as she wanted to open up there was the side of her that wanted to keep everything inside. Her mother had always told her that vocalizing your feelings does nothing good and only makes people pity you.

One thing Y/N despised was being pitied. It only reminded her of how her mother referred to her as a ‘pitiful girl’ and how she would amount to nothing.

So she slowly shook her head. “No, I don’t think I can.”

Riki felt himself beginning to sit up to look at the girl. There was something off about her. The way she spoke to him and the way that she carried herself… she wasn’t acting as she always had. Normal Y/N would be more playful and even mischievous. But now, there was a certain sadness in her entire being that seemed to be throwing her off her rhythm. And it only made Riki more and more curious about her.

“Okay, I get it. You don’t have to tell me.” Riki smiled, before continuing. “I just hope it doesn’t take away your chaotic spirit. You know, I kind of like that about you.”

A sigh left Y/N’s lips at his words. “You don’t mean that, Wonderland.”

“I mean every word, Cheshire.”

Y/N could only roll her eyes before slowly evaporating into the night, using her invisibility and teleportation to finally go back home.

Left lingering in the air was her Cheshire’s smile, which disappeared last and left Riki staring at the wisps of where she had sat only moments prior.

Maybe it made sense that Riki enjoyed stargazing. In a way, there was something about him that was made of the stars. No matter what he did, he always seemed to shine brighter than all the others. There was something about Riki that felt that he belonged up in the sky, giving life to the night and adding a certain glimmer to the auras.

Riki had his own place amongst the sky, and she wished she could be like that too. But after speaking to him, maybe there was nowhere she could have her own place in. Y/N could only wait for the day that she could contribute to a bigger picture, and take a larger part in his story. After all, she had always wanted her own place within the stars.

But for now, all she could do was hope she would become more than just the Cheshire Cat’s daughter.

Y/N carefully recounted her memories from that night, and how it had stuck with her and unknowingly fostered her feelings for Riki. As she told the story, she didn’t seem to notice the Cheshire Cat don a mischievous smile.

If her daughter wasn’t going to improve on her own, then she would have to make her improve.

୨:୧┈┈┈ · · ┈┈┈୨:୧

7. “You…r opinion?”

Liz had a habit of expecting the worst out of most situations. Perhaps it came from the fact that her destiny involved bears… big scary bears… but it was understandable. Bears weren’t known for being the most gentle creatures, after all.

So when she noticed a suspicious vial of liquid in Y/N’s bag during their Advanced Ballet class, Liz’s mind raced with negative thoughts. What was she up to? Did it have anything to do with pranking? Or maybe it was for a class assignment?

Liz truly didn’t mean to think the worst of Y/N, but she couldn’t exactly help it. Being kind wasn’t exactly in her forte and Liz was too much of a paranoid person to ignore seeing that vial.

But she also didn’t want to profile the girl for doing something that she wasn’t going to do in the first place. Liz knew that doing so wasn’t just right. So she looked around the room to see if anyone had seen her internal battle. Deciding that it had gone unnoticed, Goldilocks’ daughter let out a shaky breath and continued to practice her jetés.

“Are you still going to-” Ningning said, but paused when she realized she was being a bit too loud- especially considering the subject of the conversation was in that very room. Why was he there anyways? He didn’t even take Advanced Ballet… “Are you still going to prank Riki?” She continued in a hushed whisper.

Y/N giggled at Ningning’s apparent stress. Although she disliked making her friends upset, it was still sort of funny that she had that effect on them. “Well, I don’t see why I shouldn’t.”

Ningning frowned. “Well first of all, it’s rude.”

“Hey, if you’re not funny just say that!”

“Be serious…” Y/N made a hand movement indicating that she was shutting her mouth. Ningning then continued with her list. “It causes unnecessary problems. And besides, Riki isn’t going to like y-”

“What about Riki?”

Y/N and Ningning’s heads swiftly turned to face the voice- it was Beomgyu and Riki. Y/N could see Ningning get a little shy for reasons she decided to ignore. Beomgyu? Really? You can do better Ning…

“Don’t think you’re all that, Wonderland.” Y/N grinned. “We were talking about Ricky Jester.”

Beomgyu groaned. “Ugh, I hate that guy. He’s so annoying, I mean, we don’t care th-” His rant was cut short when Riki pressed a hand against Beomgyu’s mouth. “Thanks man, I forgot he’s in this class.”

Ningning chuckled. “Don’t be such a hater, Beomgyu.”

Ningning and Beomgyu proceeded to start their own conversation, with Beomgyu whispering to her all the things he found wrong with Ricky. Y/N felt happy for her friend in that moment, and let a small smile show on her face. It wasn’t intentional, and in fact she hadn’t even noticed it was there. But someone else noticed.

Riki couldn’t deny that he felt a certain emotion bubble in his stomach when he saw the genuine happiness on Y/N’s face. Y/N, the same girl who was often cold and didn’t show any of her softer emotions. Something about that made her happiness reflect onto him.

It was odd. He enjoyed seeing her in such a state, but he figured he felt more than he should have in that circumstance. Why did he feel like that?

No, Riki wasn’t dumb and he wasn’t the type to lie about his feelings. He could tell exactly what it was.

But was he pleased with the outcome? Riki wasn’t sure. Though he told himself that he would come to terms with whatever decision he made about his feelings on Y/N, it was easier said than done. After all, he knew that being romantically involved with the girl would come with work. A lot of work. He was also worried that everything was too rushed, and that he wasn’t thinking straight. Maybe his thought process was clouded with what he thought he wanted to happen.

Once again, the H/C female was left to her own thoughts- which obviously drifted to the boy next to her. She couldn't help it. He made her rather stable heart go all crazy when he was around.

Thoughts of confessing were brought up, but then immediately shut down because of how ridiculous it sounded. The idea of Riki having mutual feelings towards her seemed so out of the ballpark. After all, it was her. She was someone who had trouble facing her own feelings, and put up a front to hide all her troubles and insecurities. Riki always seemed put together. How could a guy such as himself possibly think about dating her?

At the same time of Y/N having doubts in her head, Riki had finally come to a conclusion. He pondered on it for a while, and he knew it was too obvious to ignore.

Riki liked Y/N.

It made him wonder, how long had he felt that way? He couldn’t help but think of the possibility of his crush starting even back then, on the day that he and Y/N shared under the stars.

He wondered if being hyper aware of Y/N and all that she does was because he liked her, or because he was a naturally curious person. He also wondered if him noticing the way her hair fell behind her ears was also because he liked her.

“Hey Riki, I have a question.” Y/N started, her cat-like eyes closing to a slant. “Why are you in our class today? I didn’t think someone like you would take Advanced Ballet. Don’t you dance hip hop?”

Snapping out of his thoughts, Riki considered the question. Why was he there? The simple answer was because Beomgyu, who actually did take the class, invited him to join since Riki had a free period.

But he thought back to the moment that Beomgyu asked, and what he said that got him to go.

“You know a lot of people in that class, actually.” Beomgyu said before listing off the people he could recall. “Liz, Ricky, Yuna, Wonyoung, Jake, Ningning, Y/N-”

Of course, Riki remembered. All the other names seemed to fade as he heard that last one.

“It was because of you-” Riki blurted out, without even thinking. He had to save himself before Y/N could catch onto his mistake. “-your opinion. I.. wanted to get your opinion on my outfit today since you’re very straightforward.”

What?! Why did I say that?

Slightly disappointed at his answer, Y/N looked at the boy up and down. Her opinion? He looked cute. As always.

“It’s hideous.”

A smirk made its way to Y/N’s face even though she didn’t agree with what she said. Though she usually acted calmer around Riki, teasing him every now and then didn’t do any harm.

“Hideous?! Hey, it’s really not that bad.” Riki chuckled. “It’s literally just an oversized jacket and baggy jeans!”

Y/N raised an eyebrow. “Um, don’t forget that you asked for my opinion, Wonderland.”

“And your opinion is wrong.” Riki said. “Also why do you call me Wonderland all the time?”

Beomgyu looked over at Y/N and Riki. He noticed the way they conversed, and how Y/N’s expression seemed softer than normal despite her mischievous jabs. He also picked up on Riki’s facials, and how his eyes seemed to sparkle in a certain way that Beomgyu had never seen before. It was interesting to see how his aura changed in the slightest when he was with Y/N.

Without realizing, Beomgyu was staring at Y/N while thinking about how glad he was that Riki found someone he liked.

He glanced over at Ningning to see if she had seen it as well, but stopped his trailing eyes when he noticed Riki giving him a weird face. Did he do something wrong?

Under the impression that Beomgyu was staring at Y/N because he was interested, Riki felt a wave of jealousy wash over his system. He never considered himself the possessive type, however, he had just realized his feelings for Y/N. It made sense that his brain was scattered and his emotions left him rather vulnerable.

For once in his life, Riki felt himself getting jealous of one of his friends. It wasn’t an instance that occurred often, as Riki knew he was a rather fortunate guy and that he had a lot to be grateful for, but he couldn’t help it this time.

Falling for Y/N Cheshire, Riki knew, came with a lot of work. He knew she had a lot of mental troubles she would need to work through, and Riki himself needed to navigate through these unfamiliar emotions.

It was work, but Riki was willing to put in the work for Y/N.

Amongst all the newfound realizations and bubbling emotions, one girl snuck away from her spot next to the group. She had been eavesdropping on their conversation for longer than intended, but what really stuck with her was what Ningning and Y/N discussed in the beginning.

Y/N… pranking Riki again?

Maybe it wasn’t anything to worry about. After all, she did prank Riki rather often. It was well known amongst the student body.

But she couldn’t shake the unsettling feeling that came over her body when she thought about what Y/N could possibly do, and the guilt that she would feel if she didn’t at least try to stop it.

Though she held a certain degree of respect for Y/N, one thing the girl stood heavily for was justice. As soon as she was far away from the group she pulled out her phone and went into Riki’s contact.

“Hey Riki, it’s me. Liz.”

୨:୧┈┈┈ · · ┈┈┈୨:୧

8. You make everyone miserable.

During the day time, it was common for Ever After High students to meet up at Hocus Latte. It was a common hang out spot between friends, though oftentimes if a girl asked a guy or vice versa people would assume it was for a date.

That was why Riki felt conflicted when he read Liz’s text.

‘I need to talk to you. Meet me at Hocus Latte at 3 p.m for a quick chat’ He reread to confirm the meeting time.

On one hand it made sense, because Yuna Rose worked there and the two were rather close. But did she not think about the message she might have accidentally sent? Riki tried not to think about it too deeply because he doubted Liz had a crush on him.

As he sat inside Hocus Latte waiting for Liz to arrive, his phone vibrated indicating he had received another text.

‘Actually I might be running late because there were some technical troubles for my MirrorCast show, but I sent over one of my friends to keep you company. Sorry about that!’

A wave of nervousness washed over his body as he read over her text. Who did she send? Riki didn’t usually find it hard to get along with others, but not knowing who he was going to have to hang out with gave him an unsettling feeling. His mind racked through the roster of Liz’s friends, and who she was most likely to send.

It’s definitely not Yuna because she’s working right now, maybe Jake? But he works for her MirrorCast show and if they were having technical troubles then she probably would have him help. What about Wonyoung- actually no, he could only hope it wasn’t her. The daughter of Snow White was someone he found rather intimidating, despite how nice she genuinely was.

As Riki pondered over the possibilities, he noticed a familiar form come into his view.

“You look stupid sitting here alone.”

Riki looked up and noticed Y/N’s signature Cheshire grin, something he hadn’t seen since they had become friends but he surely missed. He enjoyed the calm(ish) side of her that she had been presenting to him as of late, but he couldn’t help but miss the side of her that interested him in the first place. Though whatever side Y/N wanted to show him was one he was willing to accept.

He felt his heart pick up its pace as Y/N sat in the empty chair. His entire mind had been consumed by her, thinking about her almost every waking hour ever since he realized his crush on her. But despite that, he hadn’t actually expected to see her. They were good friends but the silly, fluttery feelings he felt for her still made being around her both exciting and difficult.

“Did Liz send you here?” Riki asked with a raised eyebrow. “I didn’t know you guys were friends.”

Y/N giggled. “Oh yeah, her and I are like this!” She crossed her fingers to indicate that they were close. “She loves me so much she made a MirrorCast episode about me!”

Riki remembered watching that episode, perhaps more so than he should’ve. Looking back on it, the signs that he had feelings for her were obvious. He just didn’t notice.

What happened is in the past. Now that I know I like her, I’m going to pursue her.

“It makes sense, I mean, you are a likable person.” Riki said, before taking a sip of her drink. Before Y/N could vocalize her confusion, he spoke once more. “Do you want a drink? I can order you one.”

“Oh, I’m good.” Not dropping her smirk, Y/N winked at Riki. “I already ordered one anyways.”

As Riki was about to ask what she meant, she had already turned herself intangible and disappeared. Moments passed with Riki just looking around and waiting for Y/N to come back, and eventually she did.

With a drink.

“How did you get that?”

“I ordered it, duh.” Y/N wore an expression that read ‘obviously’.

If anyone bothered to look in the back of the cafe, they would see Yuna in the kitchen covered in water and the drink she just finished making gone from her hands.

For unrelated reasons, of course.

Riki could tell that she hadn’t just ordered the drink, but he wasn’t about to point that out. He knew that Y/N could be annoying at times, but he knew she would never cross the line. He trusted her not to do that because he knew deep down, despite everything, she was a good person.

“Did you finish your Chemythstry paper?” Riki asked, changing the subject. “I heard from Jay that Rumplestiltskin is grading it harder than our past papers because he wants us to fail. That way if we ask for extra credit, he can punish us and make us spin straw into gold for him. Isn’t that sick in the head?”

Y/N stifled a laugh as she thought about their professor. “Really? That’s kind of funny, actually.”

Rolling his eyes in a teasing manner, Riki smiled. “Right, I forgot that’s pretty on brand for you. Just wait until he asks you to do it, maybe it won’t be funny then.”

“Please, Rumplestiltskin loves me.” Y/N said, emphasizing the ‘love’. “And even if he tried to fail me I would just turn it into a passing grade without him seeing.”

“I remember when you fell asleep in his class and he just let you sleep. If that were any one of us, he would’ve yelled in our faces.” Riki reminisced.

Y/N stuck her tongue out at him. “It must suck not being the favorite.”

“I’ll have you know Pied Piper loves me.”

“That’s not a flex… Everytime he plays the trumpet, rats fall from the sky. And for some reason he keeps doing it??”

“At least my professor is taller than 4 feet.”

“At least mine doesn’t like classic rock.”

“Isn’t your mom friends with Pied Piper?”

“So? That doesn’t mean I have to like him…”

The two went back and forth for a while, though it was all in good fun. It felt nice to be able to banter and tease each other and know that neither of them meant any harm by it.

Riki enjoyed speaking to Y/N, because he thought she was fun. Y/N enjoyed speaking to Riki, because she felt that she could be herself around him.

Though, all good things must come to an end. Y/N felt one of her senses pick up suddenly, and she realized her time with Riki was one of those good things.

She had to leave before Liz noticed she was there.

“It’s been fun, Wonderland, but I have to dip.” Y/N said. “Duty calls, you know?”

Before he could utter out a ‘bye’, Y/N had already disappeared and was out of his sight.

Moments after, Liz finally arrived.

“Hi Riki! Sorry for running late, there was this whole thing with the routers and Jake kept accidentally breaking things and-”

Riki waved it off before she could continue to ramble. “It’s alright! Thank you for sending someone to keep me company, it was fun.”

Liz smiled knowing that she did something helpful. “I’m glad, Chae was excited even though I asked her last minute. Weird, right? I didn’t realize you guys were friends.”

As Liz continued on about how Chaehyun was willing to drop what she was doing to accompany Riki, he paused. Did she say Chaehyun?

Didn’t she send Y/N?

“Wait, Chaehyun?” Riki asked, hoping he hadn’t heard the name incorrectly.

Confused, Liz stopped what she was saying to clarify. “Yes? She was the one I asked. Did she not tell you that?”

The pieces finally clicked in Riki’s head, and he felt a bit dumb for not noticing it sooner. Suspicious behavior was all a part of Y/N’s character but she hadn’t been acting in such a way as of late. For her to come and suddenly revert back to that was something that Riki should’ve thought about. That paired with her leaving so suddenly…

But one thing didn’t make sense, why did Y/N come instead of Chaehyun in the first place?

Before Liz could comment on Riki’s prolonged silence, he awkwardly laughed. “Sorry, yeah. Chaehyun mentioned it, I just thought you said Chaewon and I wanted to clarify.”

Whatever the reason was for Y/N to lie, he figured outing her to Liz wouldn’t be helpful.

“So, what did you want to talk about?”

“Oh right!” Liz jumped up, almost having forgotten why she wanted to meet with Riki in the first place. “I overheard something during Advanced Ballet, and I just wanted to tell you about it because I think you deserve to know.”

Advanced Ballet? Oh right, Liz was in Y/N and Beomgyu’s class. He recalled seeing her for a brief moment that day when he crashed their lesson.

The way she was putting everything made Riki slightly nervous, but he could only hope it wasn’t anything too bad. “Okay, what is it?”

“I saw a weird vial of liquid in Y/N’s bag, and I overheard her talking to Ningning about wanting to prank you. I know she pranks you often, but I just didn’t feel right seeing all that and not doing anything about it.”

Riki let out a laugh at what she said. “Thank you for being concerned, but she always does this and I’m okay with that. I know she would never cross the line.”

“That’s good! I just wanted to let you know so you could prepare if anything.” Liz smiled, glad he had taken it so well. She knew that Riki and Y/N were decent friends so she didn’t feel particularly worried about the fact that he was alright with her. “I also know Beomgyu was mentioning to Ningning that you were sick of getting pranked, so I wanted to make sure it wasn’t anything-” She paused what she was saying when a memory popped into her head. “Wait, I just remembered something. Did you know Beomgyu has a crush on Y/N?”

Riki felt his heart stop when Liz said those words.

Beomgyu had a crush on Y/N? His Y/N? How could he!

Of course Riki never vocalized his crush on her, but he had hoped that Beomgyu would be able to notice.

“O-Oh, does he really?” Riki nervously laughed, trying not to let his disappointment show. It would be embarrassing if Liz found out Riki felt the same. “He never told me that…”

“He never said it explicitly, but when he and Ningning were talking I saw him look over at Y/N a lot. He was probably asking Ningning for help on how to ask her out, since she’s one of Y/N’s best friends.” Liz chuckled. “Isn’t it so cute! I think they fit each other well. Don’t you? Maybe he’ll ask her to the True Hearts Day dance!”

No, they don’t fit each other at all. Beomgyu was annoying and stupid, and Y/N was funny and smart. She was far too beautiful on the inside to be with someone who often stole food from the Castleteria.

Riki didn’t care that Y/N also stole food. To him, it was only alright when she did it. Everything in his eyes was alright when it was done by Y/N.

But regardless, Riki didn’t want Y/N to be stunted by being with Beomgyu. He loved his friend, but he knew that he had a lot of room to mature before he gave his heart to another.

At the end of the day, Riki knew one thing and that was that he was the only one fit for Y/N.

Because he liked her. No, maybe even loved.

Though, he couldn’t admit that. Not now. “Yeah, they would look great.” He said through gritted teeth.

After wrapping up their conversation Liz and Riki decided to walk back to Ever After High together. It was getting late, and Riki was worried about Liz getting back safely.

And as much as he tried to be present in whatever Liz was saying about how to make the best porridge, he just couldn’t pay attention. All he could think about was Beomgyu and Y/N being together. The thought made him sick to his stomach. The idea of them holding hands… whispering sweet nothings into each others’ ears… kissing- It was all too much. He couldn’t stand thinking about it, yet he was addicted to the thought. He kept thinking up different scenarios that would occur if the two ever started dating.

While distracted, Riki felt a gust of wind blow behind him. He tried not to think too much about it but it felt a little unsettling.

He brushed it off, and tried to pay attention to what Liz was rambling about.

“-and then you have to drizzle it with honey! But the honey you get has to be just right, it can’t be too sweet but it also can’t be too flavorless. So that’s something you have to think about.” Liz stopped for a moment when she noticed that Riki wasn’t exactly paying attention. “Hey, are you okay?”

Riki was about to respond, however he was interrupted when he heard a familiar giggle fill the air. Suddenly, he felt a hole open up underneath him until he eventually fell through, falling for about 10 feet before he landed on hard rock.

“Riki, are you okay?!” Liz shouted from above. She looked around where she found a rope on the ground next to a tree, so she picked it up and threw it down to Riki to help him up. “What the hell happened??”

Still shaken up, Riki brushed the dirt off his clothes as he climbed up the rope. “I… I have no idea. One moment I was standing and all of a sudden I was on the ground.”

Once he got back onto the surface, the adrenaline eventually went away and he could finally feel the pain shoot up his ankle.

A giggle was heard from a distance, the same giggle that Riki had heard moments prior to falling. It was a little too familiar for his liking, and he hoped that it wasn’t who he thought it was.

“What happened to you, Wonderland?”

Riki and Liz looked to the side and Riki felt his heart drop for the second time that day.

There Y/N stood, looking cute and innocent as ever, as if she wasn’t causing a storm to brew within Riki’s heart.

Was she the one who made him fall?

“Why are you asking when you’re the one who did this?” Riki muttered, hurt shown on his face.

The previously lighthearted expression on Y/N’s face slowly shifted into a confused one. What was he talking about? “Well, I’m flattered you think I’m capable of something like this but I don’t even know what happened to you.”

“Don’t lie, don’t you think it’s weird that I fell into a hole and a few seconds later you show up?” Riki said. “I thought you were better than this, I mean, I could’ve seriously injured myself!”

It was then that Y/N realized Riki wasn’t in the best mood, and that worried her. She didn’t enjoy him being angry at her, not one bit. “Riki, it wasn’t me. Truly.”

“So you’re saying Liz was lying about how you’ve been planning on pranking me?”

Riki didn’t mean to bring Liz into it, but he couldn’t help it.

“I can’t believe you… I thought we’ve been getting closer. Then you go and do this?”

“I’m being honest, it wasn’t me!” Y/N voice raised to a yell. She felt hurt that he was blindly accusing her, though she couldn’t blame him. After all this time, she knew people only expected the worst of her. And with how she’s treated Riki in the past, it was only right that his mind would think of her to do such a thing.

But she thought he would know she would never intentionally hurt him. That’s why she only pulled small pranks. “I care about you a lot, Riki. Even though I considered pranking you in the past, I stopped myself from doing it because I want to better myself for you.”

Riki felt his heart swell at what she said, but he still couldn’t get the information he learned about Y/N and Beomgyu out of his head.

“Are you ever going to take anything seriously? I mean, aren’t you tired of acting like this?”

“Acting like what…?”

All the jealousy he felt and the anger he felt towards himself… seeing her made all the negative feelings that Riki had been feeling bubble up, and before he knew it his mouth was moving faster than his brain.

“Aren’t you tired of making people feel miserable all the time!?” He yelled, with shut eyes.

But as soon as the words left his mouth, he felt regret all around. He didn’t mean to say anything really mean, he was just upset and he had accidentally taken it out on her.

“Um, don’t you think that was a little too far?” Liz whispered, surprised that Riki of all people said that. “I think you should apologize, I mean, she really might not have done it.”

Wasn’t Liz the one suspicious of Y/N in the first place?

Before he could take back his words he looked back up at his crush, only to see hurt and shock written on her face. And Riki knew he messed up.

“I make people feel miserable…? Alright, I get it.”

The smile Y/N put on was different from all the smiles she had given him in the past. It was filled with mixed emotions- sadness, hurt, and disgust. But at who? Disgusted at him? Or maybe even herself?

That was the last he had seen of Y/N in a few days.

Riki looked up at the sky and for some reason, the stars seemed to be dimmer than usual.

୨:୧┈┈┈ · · ┈┈┈୨:୧

9. Locker chats.

It was two days before the big True Heart’s Day dance that Chaehyun had been planning, and Riki couldn’t feel more stressed.

“You said that to her??”

Soul couldn’t hold back his shock as Riki recounted his previous argument with Y/N.

It had been some time since then, and Riki knew the girl was evading him. But why? He knew he had hurt her, but didn’t he deserve an apology too? After all, she did cause him to hurt his ankle.

“She could’ve killed me, Soul.” Riki frowned. “I don’t think I’m in the wrong for being concerned about my safety.”

Soul face palmed at his friends’ obliviousness. “Has it ever occurred to you that she might not have done it? Ever since you guys became close, you know Y/N has been trying to change her nature. She wouldn’t do anything to hurt you, and especially not something that drastic.”

Riki let out a sigh as he remembered something he had been trying to push to the back of his head. “But that’s the thing, what if she doesn’t care about me as much as I thought she did?”

“Bro what-”

“Liz told me that Beomgyu likes her.” It hurt Riki’s heart to think about that fact. “What if she likes him back?”

Soul was about to voice his disagreement when his eyes trailed past Riki’s shoulder. Before he could tell him not to look, Riki was already turning his head to see what caught Soul’s attention.

But the sight was one he had been dreading to see. Beomgyu and Y/N were walking to class together, and they seemed happy to be together.

Since when were they friends? Was it because Riki hadn’t been by her side? And why hadn’t Beomgyu said anything about their new friendship?

Riki’s mind raced with the possibilities of how Y/N and Beomgyu had become friends. But no matter how they had gotten to that point, it didn’t matter.

Beomgyu was talking to Y/N. His Y/N. How could she stand there, and laugh, and look so beautiful?

How could she look so well when he was struggling so much internally?

Riki would never know just how much sleep Y/N was losing over everything, or how she had already planned out her apology.

“Maybe they’re just friends?” Soul suggested, not wanting his best friend to be upset. But even he couldn’t deny the seeming chemistry between the two.

“Don’t worry about Beomgyu, he’s not a threat.” Ningning’s voice was heard as she approached the two Wonderlandians. “Now Riki tell me, what did you say to Y/N? She hasn’t been herself these days and I know you have something to do with it.”

Riki was hesitant to tell Y/N’s best friend about what had happened, but maybe Ningning could clear some things up for him. So he described what occurred between the two of them that night in great detail, making sure Ningning was able to get the full picture.

Once he finished, he could tell the swan girl was about to slap him for what he said to her friend.

“Are you being serious right now?” Ningning scoffed. “I can’t believe I ever thought you were smart because you’re actually kind of dumb…”

Riki frowned. “Okay rude.”

Soul had to stop himself from laughing. “She kind of gagged you there…”

Ningning sighed. “Riki… Y/N was telling the truth, she didn’t do it. Her mom did.”

“...What?”

“You stupid hoe, I can’t believe you didn’t try to hear her out.” Disappointment could be heard all over Ningning’s tone, but Riki wasn’t paying attention to that.

All he could think about how he seriously messed up.

“Her mom thought you were a threat to Y/N’s success so she tried to get you out of the picture. But when Y/N found out about it, she yelled at her mom. Can you believe that?” Ningning said incredulously. “She’s terrified of her mother, but she yelled at her for you.”

He realized that he shouldn’t have gotten so defensive and just trusted his friend, after all, she had been showing that she did want to change. He should have trusted her and not let his emotions take over.

But after hearing about Y/N and Beomgyu possibly being together was just too much for him to think about, and he projected all that anger onto Y/N. The things he said and the way he acted were all uncalled for.

“Is she going to class right now?” Riki abruptly said, the only thought on his mind was that he needed to apologize.

“She’s kind of busy these days because she’s helping Chaehyun prepare for the dance, so I don’t think it’s a good time to approach her.” Ningning said. “Maybe try talking to her on the day of the dance?”

He didn’t want to wait for two more days but if Ningning thought that was best, he would trust her. Riki would wait for as long as he needed if it meant he could have Y/N back in his life.

Because more than anything, he missed her and her silly pranks.

୨:୧┈┈┈ · · ┈┈┈୨:୧

10. I’ve always loved you.

“You look pretty, Y/N.”

Y/N snapped out of her staring contest with the mirror as Ningning entered her peripherals. The daughter of the Swan Queen, who usually wore her ballet style clothing, suddenly adorned a lilac dress that was shorter in the front and longer in the back with silver details sprinkled throughout. It resembled a forest design, which was befitting of her character since she was a swan after all.

Y/N, on the other hand, wore a darker purple dress that was of a similar length and had black lace around the top. Her voluminous hair was styled into pigtails and part of it was made to resemble cat ears. Her accessories complimented the outfit perfectly, and she felt good about herself for once in her life.

A sigh left Y/N’s lips. “Thanks Ning. You look beautiful too.”

Ningning frowned. “You’re still upset, aren’t you?”

And she was right.

True Heart’s Day. It was a night many people looked forward to, and a memory they all knew would solidify within each others’ long term memories. The aspect of getting dressed up and attending a formal event was a luxury that the attendees basked in for even days after the original event. The luminescent lights, the high energy music, the romantic atmosphere— it was all too exhilarating. Although the event wasn’t intended to be a romantic one, many students had made it out to be one. Being the daughter of Cupid, Chaehyun didn’t know if she was satisfied with that outcome or not.

But for Y/N, she hadn’t even wanted to go anymore. After her fight with Riki, being in such a romantic atmosphere only made her more upset than ever. It reminded her that no matter how much she tried to change or how often she attempted to prove that she was more than what the general public made her out to be, she would never be seen as who she really was.

And that made her feel like more of an outsider than ever.

“It’s nothing. I’m excited.” Y/N smiled at Ningning, in hopes that she would stop worrying. “Is it almost time? We should go before it’s too late.”

Ningning groaned, as she remembered where they were going. “Remind me why we’re doing this again? Dances aren’t exactly my type of scene.”

Y/N chuckled. “Because we have to be there to support Chae. She’s counting on us, you know?” She paused, and a sad expression made its way onto her face. “And I don’t want to disappoint anyone anymore.”

Ningning looked at Y/N with an expression on her face, feeling sad for her friend.

She could only hope True Hearts Day would go over well.

After walking around the forest for 15 minutes, Y/N could tell that Ningning didn’t know where she was going. Why would Chae organize the dance to be so far away from the school? She knew they were keeping everything on the down low, but still.

“You have no idea where we’re going, do you?” Y/N giggled as her best friend struggled to figure out where they were going. “Why don’t we just call Chae-”

“No!” Ningning shouted. “I mean, we can’t disturb her. I’m sure we can figure it out on our own.”

Y/N doubted Ningning’s words but didn’t vocalize that.

They wandered around for a few more minutes, when Ningning spotted someone in the distance.

Bingo.

“Beomgyu! Are you guys heading to the True Hearts Day dance?”

Y/N hoped that the other person with Beomgyu wasn’t who she was hoping it would be. But unfortunately, she rarely got what she wanted.

As she looked where Ningning was, Y/N could see Riki in all his entirety. It had been a while since she had fully looked at him, and she felt her heart stop. He was just as beautiful as he’d always been. Y/N couldn’t deny that despite being the one to cut off contact, she had missed him more than ever.

Maybe there was a part of Riki that missed her too?

No, that couldn’t be the case. He said it himself, she only made people miserable.

Deep down Y/N had been pondering on that possibility for years. But hearing someone verbalize it out loud and say it to her, especially someone she liked so much, was extremely hurtful.

But she knew she needed to hear it. Because now more than ever she’s felt sorry for her actions.

Though, did Riki have to be so rude about it?

“Yeah, we’re on our way right now.” Beomgyu answered Ningning’s question while Riki and Y/N had an intense staring contest. “What are you two doing here? Isn’t it in the other direction?”

Ningning facepalmed at her stupidity. They had been going the wrong way. “Oh yeah! I definitely knew that. I was just… making sure you guys would get there safe.”

Chuckling at her denial, Beomgyu smiled. “Right, because that makes so much sense.”

Y/N could see Ningning getting shy. “Well since we’re all here, should we just head over together?” Ningning suggested looking at Y/N to get her approval more than anything.

Although she had been avoiding Riki, Y/N really didn’t want any more bad blood between the two of them. Even if he would never like her back, she missed her friend and would do anything to fix everything. “I’m alright with that. But let’s go faster, because we’ll already be late enough as is.”

The four began walking together, the atmosphere silent but not awkward. They were lucky that they were decent enough friends with each other that being together wouldn’t be an issue.

However with Y/N and Riki too cowardly to apologize to one another, there was a slight tension in the air that was too thick for Ningning and Beomgyu to handle. The two made subtle eye contact, and nodded.

“Hey Y/N,” Beomgyu started, as he approached the distracted girl. “You look pretty.”

Y/N appreciated Beomgyu and his kindness, but she had wished those words were said by a certain someone instead. But she didn’t want to let her disappointment show, so Y/N did what she did best. Hide everything under her teasing personality. “You don’t look too bad yourself, Hood. I mean for once, you don’t look like you just finished rolling in dirt.”

“Oh please, says the girl who sleeps in trees.”

Riki frowned when he heard Y/N and Beomgyu bantering. Did she normally joke around with him like that? How often did they talk to each other? How long had they been friends?

He couldn’t help but feel himself getting jealous that Y/N teased other guys that weren’t him. Though, he should’ve expected it. After all, she teased everyone. Riki was never an exception. Although, he often wondered if her calling Riki by his last name was something she reserved for him or used on others.

But a thought crossed Riki’s mind. Perhaps he wanted to be the only guy that she teased.

“You’re sooooo jealous right now, aren’t you?” Ningning snuck up behind Riki and whispered in his ear. “She might need a little more than a push in the right direction.”

“Ningning wh-”

Ningning put a finger to Riki’s mouth as he was a little too loud for her liking. “Y/N. Be honest, do you like her?”

“I do.”

Before, he would hesitate before saying that he liked her. But at this point, he was too far down the ladder of love to even want to deny it anymore.

Riki Wonderland was in love with Y/N.

“I love her, Ningning. I always have.”

Ningning smiled. “Tell her that. She needs to hear it now more than ever.”

Riki looked past Ningning to where Beomgyu and Y/N were talking. They were a little in front of him, but far enough to where him and Ningning’s conversation would be inaudible. He admired the way she seemed to skip out of excitement, the way the sun made her look ethereal, and the way she made all her movements seem graceful. He glanced at the way her hand dangled on her side, lonely as ever.

He wanted to be the one to hold it.

After some time, the quartet arrived at the venue. Chaehyun had done amazing with the preparations; Y/N and Ningning couldn’t help but feel proud of their friend for what she did. It had taken a long time of planning, but the dance was finally fully fleshed out. It was truly an amazing feat she took up and she executed it beautifully.

There were pink and red hearts scattered around the room, as well as pink and red falling from the ceiling. The punch and snack table was well decorated with various kinds of snacks and spanned from one side of the room to the other. In the middle, there was a dance floor where Yoon Piper was stationed as the DJ. The room was already packed with most of the students in Ever After High, all high off the adrenaline of doing something so risky.

Beomgyu led Riki to meet up with some of their mutual friends who they spotted in the distance. Jungwon Croakington, Jake Charming, and Sunghoon Winter waved them over when they made eye contact. The group was situated near the punch bowl.

Y/N and Ningning went to find Chaehyun, who was sat alone at a table.

“Hey gorgeous,” Ningning complimented Chaehyun. “What are you doing over here alone?”

“After all the preparation I’m kind of tired. Isn’t that funny? I spent so much time making it perfect that I can’t even enjoy how it turned out.” Chaehyun bitterly laughed. “I was with Sullyoon earlier after she helped me set up, but I didn’t want to dampen her mood so I left.”

“But you look too good tonight not to enjoy it!” Y/N put her hand on Chaehyun’s. “Why don’t we go dance so you can loosen up a bit?”

Chaehyun shook her head. “Maybe later, I don’t think I’m in the mood right Besides, I think someone wants to talk to you right now.”

Before Y/N could ask what she was talking about, Chaehyun nodded her head over to where Liz was standing with a sheepish expression.

“Hey, Y/N.”

Y/N knew part of why Riki had lashed out at her was because Liz said something to him, she wasn’t dumb. But in all honesty, she didn’t hold it against the girl. After all, Liz had never acted maliciously towards her. She definitely had an explanation for what she did.

“I just wanted to say sorry for what happened with Riki.” Liz sighed with an apologetic expression. “I was under the impression that you were going to do something that was going to hurt him, and I was just doing what I thought was right. But I should’ve talked to you about it first and not just made assumptions.”

Y/N put on the most genuine smile she could muster to convince Liz she wasn’t upset with her. “It’s okay, you were just trying to be helpful. It’s my fault for acting this way in the first place. If I didn’t, then people wouldn’t have a reason to suspect me of doing bad things.”

Liz frowned when she said this. Did Y/N really see herself in that way? “But you’re more than just that! Throughout our time at Ever After High, I’ve always admired you.” Y/N’s eyes widened when she said that. “I mean, you’re already ready to sign the Storybook of Legends. Even with all the people who don’t like you, somehow you’ve always seemed to have everything together. And I think that’s really strong of you.”

Hearing that from Liz, knowing that there was someone out there who believed there was more to her than what she displayed, it was relieving.

Because it meant that there was the possibility for her to redefine her legacy.

“Thanks Liz, that means a lot to me.” Y/N gave the blonde a hug. “And… I’m sorry for waking you up from your nap that one time.”

Liz chuckled at the memory she had long forgotten. “It was getting late anyways. Maybe I should thank you instead.”

Once the two had finished their discussion, Liz left to go greet Yuna who had just arrived. That left Y/N… alone? She hadn’t even noticed that Ningning and Chaehyun left during her conversation with Liz. But where did they go?

Y/N’s cat eyes trailed to the side of the room and surely enough, she saw her best friends talking to Beomgyu and some of his friends.

Though, Riki was nowhere to be found.

Despite how scared she was to talk to him still, her conversation with Liz had given her a boost of courage and confidence in herself that she wouldn’t have had otherwise. There was something in her that told her she needed to go find Riki and clear the air, because she was tired of the pettiness.

She wanted Riki back.

Y/N needed to find him, but he was nowhere to be found inside of the venue. She looked all around and asked all the people who could possibly know where he was, but nothing was of any help. That’s when it clicked in her brain and she realized that she knew where Riki was all along, and she just hadn’t thought about it.

Before the night could end, Y/N went outside so she could find Riki.

Just as she had hoped, she had spotted him sitting on the branch of a tree, looking up at the stars. Y/N could notice his bed of fluffy hair from anywhere.

She tried to ignore the incessant racing of her heart while she thought about what she was going to say to him for the first time in a week.

“Is there any more room up here?”

Riki looked down when he heard her voice, the voice he had been waiting to hear all night. Memories from the night they spent stargazing when they were 11 filled his mind, as he shook his head. “I was just coming down.”

Riki climbed down the tree as fast as he could but not too fast to where it would ruin his outfit. He still wanted to look good for Y/N even if they were going through a tough time.

“Are you enjoying the dance so far?” Riki asked once he was on the ground and him and Y/N were facing one another.

There was a slight awkwardness in the air, but it was washed out by the fact that they were just happy to be speaking once again.

Y/N nodded. “Chae did a really good job with everything, even if I haven’t been able to enjoy it all yet.”

“What do you mean?” Riki could tell where she was going, but he wanted to let her speak before he made assumptions.

Swallowing her pride, Y/N looked into Riki’s eyes. Those eyes… she had missed them. There was an unreadable expression on Riki’s face that Y/N could only hope meant he wanted her just as much as she wanted him.

She didn’t know that he wanted her more.

“I’m sorry Riki, for everything.” Y/N finally let out. “I’m sorry for pranking you so often, and I’m sorry for crossing lines that should’ve never been crossed. I just found you the most fun to prank, but I never wanted to do it so often to the point that it would make you uncomfortable. But I’m trying to get better at noticing those things.” Riki smiled at the fact that she was finally being vulnerable with him. He had waited years for this to happen. “I don’t want to keep secrets from you anymore. That day when we stargazed together, I ran away because I had a fight with my mom. She told me that I wasn’t good for anything, and that I should’ve never been born because I could never continue her legacy anyways. It got really tense between us so I ran away.”

As happy as he was that she was being open with him, he did feel upset with the reasoning. Not because he didn’t like it, but because he was upset it had happened and he couldn’t do anything to take away her pain. To think that she was carrying something so heavy for so long… All Riki wanted to do in that moment was take her pain away.

Riki gave her a sad smile and slowly raised his arms so they would be around his shoulders.

“May I?”

Y/N gave consent and Riki leaned into a hug. It was the first time they had truly been intimate, and it gave both teens a slight fluttery feeling in their stomachs. Faces red and heartbeats synced, the rush of young love was one too overwhelming to bear.

They unknowingly felt themselves succumb deeper and deeper into the feeling of loving one another, both itching to feel more of that lovestruck feeling they always felt when they were together.

“I have one more secret I haven’t told you yet.” Y/N whispered. She was too nervous to use her full voice, as she was afraid that it would come out shaky.

“What is it, Y/N?”

Y/N lifted her head from off of Riki’s shoulder and came face to face with him. Their faces were extremely close but neither wanted to change that. They stared into each other’s eyes for a short moment, though that moment felt longer than it really was.

“Riki, I love you. I always have.” Y/N confessed. “Ever since we first met back in Wonderland, I’ve always found myself drawn to you. And even though I never told you, you helped me a lot that day when I fought with my mom. I only became more infatuated with you from then on, and that’s why I pranked you so much.”

At her confession, Riki felt a wave of relief wash over his entire being. The fact that she felt the same way for so long made him even more giddy on the inside than he already was.

The feeling of having one reciprocate your feelings is something that can’t be replicated elsewhere.

“I love you so much and I don’t know how to handle it. What should I do?” Y/N finally felt comfortable voicing out all her thoughts that they were running out of her mouth like a water stream. She could only thank Riki for that. “How do I fix these feelings?”

Riki mustered up whatever courage was left within him to brush his hand against her lips ever so slightly. “Kiss me.”

After a moment of hesitation, the two leaned into each other until their lips met in a kiss. Both could feel a shock of electricity rush through as their lips melded together like they were always meant to. It only felt right and at that moment, they both realized something.

Perhaps it was all written in the stars.

Though both were inexperienced, so the kiss had ended just as quickly as it started.

“I love you too, Y/N.” Riki realized that he never explicitly stated his feelings to the girl, and he intended on doing so as passionately as he could. “I’ve loved you ever since the first time I saw you pull a prank on someone when we were 8. I’ve always been so interested in you, because you were always an enigma to me. But as we eventually got closer, I felt myself falling deeper in love with you as I learned something about you every day.” Riki was glad to get everything off his chest. “I love you so much that when you got closer to Beomgyu, I lashed out and took it out on you. Because I want to be the only guy you give your attention to.”

“I want to be the only guy you tease.”

Y/N was glad that they were shrouded in the darkness, because her face was burning up more than ever at his words.

She rarely got shy in front of people. But with Riki, the possibilities were endless.

“But I’m sorry for everything I said that day, I was just upset. You don’t make people miserable.” Riki apologized.

“Well I would hope not.” Y/N said with her signature grin, in order to lighten up the mood.

Even though nothing she said was particularly funny, the two found themselves bursting out into laughter. They were running on the emotional high they had gotten from the confessions. But now, knowing that their feelings for each other were felt by the other person, there was nothing left to hide.

Y/N was ready to show every side of her, good, bad, and ugly. Because for once in her life, she noticed that she was more than just the Cheshire Cat’s daughter.

Right then, in that moment, Y/N was capable of being loved for who she really was.

As the night came to a close, they could hear Yoon announce that a slow dance song would be played next from inside the venue.

Riki didn’t have to say any words for Y/N to know what he was going to ask her.

Once the music played, Y/N laid her head on Riki’s shoulders as he led her into a slow dance, their first slow dance as a couple.

Y/N sighed happily into Riki. “You know, you remind me of the stars.”

“Why, because my shirt is blue?” He retorted, referencing the blue top he had worn to the dance.

“No, stupid. I didn’t know why before but I think I figured it out.” Y/N giggled. “The stars are make up the night sky, and they have a place built for them. They’re beautiful. And to me, you’re all of that.”

Riki smiled with nothing but love in his eyes, and kissed Y/N’s forehead. “If I’m the stars, then you’re a constellation. Just like how the constellations connect the stars and make them whole, you do the same for me. You make me feel whole.”

No matter what, Y/N would always look up at the stars and think about Riki. They represented every part of him in his entirety, and she couldn’t get enough of it. Funnily enough, the stars seemed to be shining brighter than usual that night.

The two continued to slow dance into the night, both blinded by the wonders of young love. Being encapsulated by the giddy feelings and speaking sweet nothings to each other was the perfect way to end their story.

Ningning felt her heart swell with pride as she admired the newfound couple. After all the heartbreak Y/N had gone through in her life, it was refreshing to see her genuinely happy for once. She couldn’t help but wonder if she could experience the same soon enough. But that was a problem for another day. This was Y/N’s story, and she was glad to have contributed to her happy ending. She looked between Beomgyu and Chaehyun and nodded.

Chaehyun was relieved to know that Riki and Y/N ended up together. When she looked outside to see for herself if it was true, she let out a long sigh. It was about time.

The future Cupid winked at both of her friends, signaling that their plan had worked.

Perhaps she was better at matchmaking than she thought she was.

authors note. chaehyun beomgyu and ningning best plotters!!!

cheshire taglist. @thesassy-mia @oldjws @enhacatalog @hoonpalettes @star-ism @lprww @asteria-wood

permanent taglist. @muhwaa @hoori @yizhoutv @ja4hyvn @carayat @one16core @enhacolor @haerinz @soobin-chois @en-boyz @ohmy-fandoms @yjwonz @yunki4evr @strwberrydinosaur @duolingofanaccount @iichaeyj @eundiarys @ineedaherosavemeenow @chaerybae @bubblytaetae @w3bqrl @xiaoderrrr @jaeyunnsworld @rikizm @teddywonss @gweoriz @dimplewonie @jennaissantes @kivrio @kaykay11sworld @itsactuallylina (if u requested to be on my permanent taglist and u didn’t get tagged it’s bc i cant see ur acc, but pls dm me if u want to be in it !)

[pizzagame4000]

NOISETTE THEMED DOODLE DUMP ft. cheesecake and the spouses

copious hazel headcanons under the cut because i can’t help myself

first off: her name is Hazel 👍🏻 ik that’s a common one but it’s literally perfect… canon info to me

her favorite thing to do, besides making experimental food, is actually exercising! she’s an incredibly skilled acrobat and stunt artist, so she needs to be fit for that, but she also just enjoys letting the excess energy out bc she gets really cranky otherwise. she’s toned af and could wipe the floor with you - she doesn’t go around picking fights for no good reason, but if she did… heehee

she has such an unending well of passion for all of her interests that some find her to be too much but she dgaf… she’s unabashedly autistic and does NOT care if you don’t want to hear her infodump about obscure cheeseslime genetics, she will do it anyways

i like to think that, although she is very bubbly, she has an insane morbid streak that catches people off guard. she loves talking about anatomy and gross-out subjects to anyone who can stomach it, and cracks the most fucked up jokes - it’s one of the reasons her and noise get along so well. she is thinking about blood and guts because she thinks it’s interesting!!!! she will give you hyperspecific graphic threats of violence if you make her mad!!! teehee!!

i would put her at like… chaotic neutral but leaning towards good. she has an almost scientific fascination with violence and seeing what kinds of stress a body can take, and doesn’t mind watching shit unfold instead of helping… unless something actually super fucked up is going on (like way past canon typical pizza tower violence), she’s not going to bat for you lol she’s gonna grab a camera and clipboard

her interest in anatomy branches out into a love for biology, medicine and health in general - as much as she loves watching her boyfriend beat the shit out of some chump on live tv, she also loves studying how different creatures work and how to treat injuries. she almost became a doctor! but she didn’t like the rigid schedule and pressure, so she fostered her interest in dance and gymnastics, and went into television as a stunt double instead. that’s actually how she met noise! that’s why they look so much alike - she was told to inquire NTV for a job because of the resemblance. noise thought she was so cool she was asked to be his co-star instead, and they’ve been inseparable ever since.

sometimes she gets tired of the noisette persona, but she does genuinely like theo, so it’s hard. she’s been more busy with this NTV gig (that’s looking more like a full blown career) than she would like, so that’s why she opened her cafe - to do something else for once dammit!! she likes weird shit, food included!!!

i have two shipping scenarios i like, so consider these parallel universes - hazel x vigi, and hazel x vigi x noise

if you don’t like negative takes on the noise relationship i’d recommend skipping to 2 ^_^

1. her relationship with noise deteriorates bc noise can’t accept the fact that hazel doesn’t wanna be noisette all the time! they’re so busy, he barely even makes time for her anymore - he barely even tolerates her! it’s not until vigi comes into the picture that she realizes she doesn’t have to deal w that mess. but it sucks cuz noise isn’t just her bf, but also like!!! a big part of her career!!! and she does genuinely love him but he’s just!!! an uncommunicative ass!!! it culminates in hazel leaving him and crashing at vigi’s farm because fuck it, it’s her life she does what she wants. she will kiss the cheese AND rebuild her tv career, on her own terms this time baybee

2. noise and hazel still have that issue but they actually communicate like adults and fix their relationship problems, so none of that shit happens! happy ending! hazel has her own life and theo actually lets his gf know he loves her! woah! enter vigi, in: “we saw you across the bar and we really dig your vibe…” imagining vigi as a third to hazel and theo, completely out of his depth but too bisexual to care, is SO funny to me lol… like hazel and him are probably the only two together at first but over time he and theo warm up to each other more (gay intent) and it’s perfect

[spookykoolkat]

the red j.m | chapter two

CHAPTER TWO: HELL ABOVE

series masterlist | main masterlist

previous chapter | next chapter

pairings: older!joel miller x plus sized!younger!reader

chapter summary: it's week one staying jackson with none other than joel miller himself, and it's nerve wracking. in a new town, with new people, and living under the roof of the most intolerable man ever—you struggle to feel comfortable, to feel like you belonged. joel doesn't make it easier on you either.

warnings: mean joel, mentions of death, grief, loneliness, and mentions of su*cidal ideation and attempt.

wc: 4k-ish

na: this is like the slowest burn i've ever done BUT I HOPE EVERYONE ENJOYS 🖤 the next chapter will be out soon but omg tysm for all the love i enjoy every comment i get and feel so warm when i get reblogs i love u guys i promise SMUT soon!!! heehhehehe they're just stubborn these characters 🤦🏻‍♀️

YOU

november 20th, 2024.

it was your first week staying in jackson, under joel’s watch. maria decided it was best you had people around you while you were here, and it seemed like the person you could tolerate the most was joel.

they were wrong unfortunately. even after your breakdown in the infirmary, you wanted nothing to do with joel or anyone here. still, you were so adamant on being alone. without wanting to admit it, you knew you had demons that were bigger than the people around you. every time you went down, you dragged people down with you. now you’re expected to live in a community with good people that want to help?

joel wasn’t too happy either, fighting with his brother about the fact that whether he liked it or not, he could talk some sense into you regardless. he already had ellie to watch for, to take care of, now he has to babysit you. it wasn’t that he hated you, he hated the fact that you and him were too much alike. he hated the fact that he wanted to leave you there first. not only that, but ellie took a strong favor to you. He was barely getting used to having ellie in his life, and now there’s another body walking around the empty house.

maybe the universe played into your favor when you found out joel lived with a small girl, ellie. you assumed if joel of all people could have a daughter and be a father, there was some good in his heart. but you knew it only extended for her and his brother. you knew joel was just as dark souled as you, maybe even more.

you walked behind joel passing the buildings, homes, and people as they build and construct around the area. you were nervous, as joel nodded towards tommy who was standing on a tall platform.

“tommy ain’t putting you on patrol for a while, not sure they can trust you with a gun,” joel said as he took a suitcase filled with essentials that maria packed for you a few days after she made sure you were a little more clear headed.

he finally stopped in front of a two story house that looked like it had wear and tear, but you saw the small fix ups that were patched up or replaced on the house, like how the gutter’s not matching the same shade. the entire neighborhood was painted in snow though, everything was frozen while there were some small christmas decorations people found. it felt real to you, safe.

“guess i’ll just get bit by those fuckers if they find a way in,” you rolled your eyes as you gripped the cuffs of your black sweater.

“or killed by raiders or something, you know, shit like that.” you couldn’t help yourself, it was coming out before you could stop and joel just gave you a hard look. but you knew he knew you were right, which is why he shut up and led you into the house.

the two of you walked inside and you took in the scent of coffee and smoke. smelled better than rotting flesh. it was a rustic home, dark and near gothic, but something you’d see in a movie about vampires maybe. you liked it. it felt warm and safe, inviting but with an edge.

“it’s okay you can borrow one of mine,” a girl said coming from the back hall, hair tugged into a ponytail and wearing a long sleeve shirt with jeans. ellie heard the bickers from the window, and decided to take it upon herself to save you. you smiled at the girl, assuming this is the ellie joel mentioned.

“no, ellie, i mean it,” joel demanded, grabbing your new belongings and dragging it upstairs.

“i’m ellie, are you the girl they found? said you almost died,” ellie said nonchalantly and your lips quirked up into a small smile, heart warming at the young girl. something was a little off though, you could sense a small unwavering tension between the girl and joel.

“i am the girl they found,” you said and introduced yourself, a hand reaching for hers.

ellie doesn’t take long to show you around the very rustic house with intricate detailing on the trim, a fireplace in the average sized library, the only two bathrooms in the house and the backyard patio as well. ellie also makes it known that half of the things that seemed like they were here before, weren’t and it was joel who rebuilt the roof and the patio outside. also noted that joel is the one who cuts their firewood even though she’s insisted she can do it.

“he doesn’t trust me with much but, i find my way,” ellie smiles and you smiled with her.

“you and me both.”

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you settled in your room, not too small but you weren’t really in the mood to care where you were. as long as you had a bed, a toilet, and a fan. which you did. it didn’t take you long to rummage through your backpack for the walkman that maria fixed, sliding in the cassette and listening through the dainty headphones. it was etta james, your mother’s collection of music that you managed to steal on your way out of your childhood home.

you thought about your mom a lot. your family of course, but your mom the most. you were the only child, and when everything happened your mother protected you with her life. your father took the manly duties of hunting and looking for things you needed to survive, trading, leading the two of you to the QZ just to be somewhere that was safe.

but it wasn’t safe. and your mother knew it. arguments would erupt about it, your mother wanted to leave but your father didn’t. you didn’t know who was right. you didn’t know how to survive on your own, you weren’t ready to lose your parents.

you just stared, your eyes drying up from the lack of blinking. you were too deep in thought when joel knocked on your bedroom door, not getting a response and it worried him. he walked in slowly announcing himself so that if you would know, but still nothing.

you didn’t even notice joel standing in your room, waving his hand trying to get your attention.

“jesus, what the fuck?” you said slipping off the headphones as you sit on the edge of your bed.

“we’re all goin’ to the diner for dinner, so come down,” he said and you shook your head.

“i’m good here, thanks,” you said and he scoffed.

“you ain’t got a choice.” you rolled your eyes and huffed, looking down at your feet. you felt like a fucking kid.

you just wanted to sleep, you wanted to stay holed up in this room until you figure out where you’ll go after this. you knew you didn’t want to stay too long here. you stayed quiet as you walked downstairs, and you stayed quiet on the way out of the house and into the small neighborhood of houses. lights hung over the area, snow fell down slower to you here for some reason, and you heard the unbothered chatter and laughter throughout the street. it was strange.

everyone called it the diner, but really it was like just a dinner hall. a place where food was served for breakfast, lunch and dinner and occasional snacks like nuts and berries. it sufficed, and it was the best reminder of what it was like being a civilized community. you just couldn’t help but feel so out of place, so unwanted. you knew tommy and maria wanted you to stay, but joel was a little hard to get used to. It’s not like you haven’t been unwanted before, you just didn’t know why it felt so different coming from a man like joel.

joel and ellie were in front of you chatting about his new patrol route, and when’s the soonest she can start settling into her own. he says something about her being too young to be put in classes for it right now, and you absentmindedly laughed at it.

“somethin’ funny back there?” joel said, turning his head to you quickly before looking back to the buildings passing by.

“no such thing as being too young in this world. she’ll learn sooner or later, hell she probably already knows.” you said matter of factly and he looked at ellie, then looked at you and stopped. you almost ran into his back before you stopped yourself.

“ellie, go on inside tell tommy we’ll be there in just a minute,” a part of you wanted to ask what part of texas he was from, maybe you were from there too. his southern accent was one of few, including yours.

you looked at ellie and she put her lips into a thin line, looking a little apologetic before leaving to walk a few more steps and into a brightly lit cafeteria.

“if you’re gonna be stayin’ with us, i don’t want none of this shit. just because you had it rough being a kid in this world don’t mean she’s got to.” he said firmly, pointing slightly in the direction of ellie. you furrow your brows, looking at the snow past him.

“i’d rather my kid know how to protect herself in case this little bullshit fantasy world you got here turns to shit.” you spit and looked back at him. he was almost fuming now. you could see the heat rise to his cheeks as he clenched his jaw.

“she ain’t my kid, and it ain't up to you.” he said, stepping back from you.

“i don’t care if she was your sister, everyone needs to know how to protect themselves. especially a little girl like that. even if you do have a safe world here in this little town, there are still evil fuckin’ people.” you argued and tried to walk past him, but he lightly gripped your arm.

“look, just, keep it to yourself a’right? she’s got enough goin on, don't need you in her ear makin’ shit worse for her.” he said coldly, making you wanted to back away from him and retreat.

“of course, because i’m the one you need to worry about, get off of me,” you said and looked away, snatching your arm away from him and walking into the diner without him.

you didn’t know how to feel about joel and this new arrangement. a part of you was taking it out on him when in most people’s eyes, he’s trying to help you. it just didn’t feel like help coming from him. it felt like it was his obligation, he had to, and if it was up to him you’d be frozen food for animals wandering around the commune.

and he made it fucking hard to like him or feel grateful. it feels like you got stuck with the asshole neighbor to babysit you, in fact that’s basically what it is.

it was a large place, chairs and tables put in rows while leaving a walkway to the line for food. you spotted tommy, maria and ellie sitting at a long table with a few other people, and your tummy churned. you hadn’t been around other people in a long time, not like this. maybe since you were a kid, other than that you walked around and hid and fought by yourself, or you had someone and they didn’t make it. you always ended up alone, in every scenario.

“c’mon,” his gruff voice said behind you, ghosting his hand over your back to guide you to the table. you jerked away from his hand, and he noticed. he pulled his hand back quickly and created a distance between the two of you.

“this is too much,” you breathe as you slowly walk to the table with him still behind you.

“you gonna stand there and panic or what?” he taunted and you huffed. fucking asshole.

the anxiety bubbled up within you again, realizing you haven’t been around this many people in a long time. but you were here, there was no going back. you kept walking and finally reached the table where they looked like they were waiting for you two. tommy and maria gave you a smile and you returned one back, going to sit next to ellie while joel sat in front of you, next to tommy.

“how’d you settle in?” maria asked, hand on her belly with the other entangled in tommy’s.

“fine,” you said and looked at her, “thank you for the suitcase, by the way. i appreciate it.”

it was genuine. you did appreciate it because only god knows you needed more tampons and underwear. fuck, just basic hygienic items. you were more than grateful, but still weary. you felt on high alert, honestly the right term was paranoid. and everyone saw it.

you were practically hugging yourself tight in the chair, almost fearful for someone to come close. joel saw it too.

“of course, anything you need you let me know, and tommy or joel,” maria said and smiled as she got up, leading tommy to stand as well. you weren’t sure how reliable joel would be to you, but you just nodded anyways.

“let’s eat, yeah?” she said and before anyone else could stand, ellie stood and immediately walked into the line to get a plate. you followed after tommy and maria, and joel followed you. he just kept watch on you. nervous and like you, paranoid.

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“so, where are you from?” ellie asked as she dug into the mashed potatoes, stuffing it in her mouth.

“ellie,” joel warns and she looked at him, defeated.

“what? i just wanna know, she sounds like you,” she observed and maria smiled at ellie’s usual behavior.

“i’m uh, from texas. i was born in el paso but moved to austin when i was 3.” you responded. you figured it didn’t do any harm, if anything maybe it’s best the people that are letting you stay with them know who you are and where you’re from.

you noticed the shared glances between joel and tommy, then looked back down at your plate to poke at the broccoli.

“that’s weird, joel and tommy are from austin too,” ellie pointed out and joel looked at ellie hard, a second warning.

“how did you and ellie find each other, joel?” you asked, a little comfortable to ask your own questions. tommy looks at you with a look you can’t necessarily decipher and begins to open his mouth before joel talks first.

“mission gone wrong. ended up back here afterwards, bout a year ago.” he said curtly and you nodded, eating your dinner. he wasn't one for talking, and neither were you, but he seemed so irritated by your new presence.

you noticed the shared look between joel and ellie. it was unsure, weary.

more conversations erupt afterwards, tommy going into how maria’s appointment went and occasionally saying hi to those who pass by with their plates. you don’t pay much attention unfortunately, you kind of stay in your own mind after mentioning where you lived.

you were still sitting next to ellie, and maria sat on the other side of ellie, tommy sat in front of maria and joel sat in front of ellie. you felt a little emptiness as you realized you didn’t have much to say when thinking about when it all happened. it’s like you can’t move on, like you can’t get your mind around it.

you wished you could move on and accept the small beauties in this life, admire the new growth of plants and grass, enjoy the christmas like feel of the town in the snow, accept that there’s people wanting to help you. it felt too good to believe, so you were hesitant.

you felt joel’s eyes on you most of the night, flickering between you and ellie as the night fell longer. you wanted to ask him why he was looking at you so much, why he was so tense and angry looking. maybe that’s just how he looked.

it wasn’t long before everyone parted ways and maria pulled you to the side before leaving.

“how are you holding up? is joel treating you okay?” she asked and you stuffed your hands in the pocket of your black jacket.

“i’m okay, joel’s fine. not the most cheerful man but who is?” you said and gave a small smile, watching maria watch you. you were lying, and she could tell so she gave you a small pat on the arm. you flinched away from the touch but she still did it anywaye.

“if you want, and if you’ll stay, i can let you take patrol classes to be out there again next month. if i can trust you.” she said and you looked at joel who was talking to ellie, waiting for you.

“is it worth it?” you asked her, expecting her to know what you mean. “like, going back out there. finding other places. is it worth it?”

she thought about it a little. “only if you want to be alone.”

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you thought about it on the way back to your new living space. did you want to be alone? was it worth being alone? you didn’t know and as you sulked on your bed, looking outside of the window directly across from you, you wondered what your life would’ve looked like if the world never ended.

to you, it ended. you wanted to believe it was judgment day rather than an incurable fungus. maybe it was god, the universe, maybe it was meant to happen.

but how? babies, kids, teens, mothers, fathers—dead and gone and for what? you were so angry at the world still. so angry for losing, so angry for being powerless in all of this. maybe the world would suck less with someone in your life. maybe if you had something to fight for, like joel said, it’d make more sense.

another knock on your door and without moving, you murmur a small come in. joel walked through the threshold, letting the door stay open a crack as he sits on the ottoman pressed against the wall of the window.

“you feelin’ better?” he choked out slightly, looking at you. he looked like he was almost pushed in here by someone, forced to say things he didn't want to say. maybe it was ellie who told him to check on you.

“are you asking if i still wanna kill myself?” you asked, leaning against the bed frame at the end of your bed.

“no, i don’t.” you said, referring to both questions. joel waited a bit before he responded.

“being angry all the time ain’t changin’ nothing you know that right? spending your days mad at the world, it’s still gonna be the same tomorrow and the next day.” this was his way of comforting, kind of stating the obvious.

“being that angry is just gonna kill ya,”

but he was so cold it was like trying to get a hug from a cactus. you eyed him, wondering if those are the words he should choose right now. you didn’t take him for a happy man.

“when you left austin, you were angry right? angry at the world?” you asked, looking at the wooden floor.

“yes, but-” he began but you cut him off. you weren’t letting him win this.

“and how old were you?” you asked. he knew where you were going with this. he knew it wasn’t the same.

“you had time to process it. you had the chance to be angry when all of this shit first happened. i was five, joel. i didn’t have time to be a kid, i didn’t have time to be angry then. i didn’t know what the fuck was happening. until everyone around me died,” you paused and looked at him. his gaze was still hard but he looked like he was thinking.

“i was her age when everyone around me died, and i had to be on my own. and i’ve had people in my life after. not all of them good. i’ve been hurt, violated–i didn’t have a protector like she did. does. i know everyone has their sob story. i’m allowed to be angry.” you finished and sighed, rubbing your forehead.

you didn’t know what else to say. you were just so angry, now at him.

“i’m sorry. you didn’t deserve that, you know. you should’ve, y’know, been able to be a kid.” this wasn’t his thing. you could tell. but he was trying, and he really didnt know what to say either.

“yeah,” you agreed and finally acknowledged that it was just him and you in this room. the silence made it too obvious, and you kind of pulled your body into yourself.

“i’m gonna get some sleep, be best if you do too,” his southern accent sounded thick, sounded so sharp that you felt like you could listen to it for hours. you always enjoyed the southern twang of your own accent, but hearing his felt different.

“should i stay, joel? would you leave, if you were me?” you asked before he grabbed the handle after standing up, and he turned to look at you.

“i don’t know,” he said. he wasn’t going to be the blame for you making a mistake that you regretted. he wasn't going to be anything more than a provider while you were under his watch, he wasn’t someone to give advice.

“goodnight, joel.” you said coldly, moving off the bed and crawling into the covers. he stepped out of your new room, saying nothing. you wanted to cry. everything was so cold around you, so uncomfortable.

you were confused. and you were alone, at that. your loneliness never felt like this before, and it hurt. you missed your mother, you missed your father. you missed normalcy, you missed not having to fight for yourself 24/7. you were tired and joel was humbling you. he was waking you up to reality, that nobody will be there for you other than yourself.

he was showing you that not everybody cares about sob stories. if your pain outweighed another person’s pain. he was showing you that you only have yourself in the end, to depend on and fight for.

a part of him did want you to stay. he knew all too well what the world held for you outside of these walls. he knew you'd get yourself killed out there, and for some reason he felt too guilty to not encourage you to stay. he wanted to somehow keep you safe too, even if it’s not him doing it. but a part of him wondered if he had to keep you safe from yourself, if you were the biggest threat to your own safety—or if he was.

you knew what the world held for you too. absolutely nothing. you felt like you were living in hell. it held nothing for you, nothing but constantly battling to fight for your survival. it felt like hell because it seemed like your worst days were on repeat, replaying for you to relive it all over again. your days felt the same. still not a day went by without having some sort of blood shed.

constantly being paranoid, wondering if there was someone in the darkness of the woods watching you like prey. you hadn't known peace for such a long time, and here it was in the guise of a bitter old man with a pretend daughter.

he didn’t know how long it’d be before he was the reason you were hurt, lost, or worse.

there were things you didn’t know, things he didn’t want you to know and if you did, you’d flee again. as you should. he was a monster. but he was scared, and he’s been scared since ellie came into his life.

he was feeling it again. the attachment, the tugging at his heart and lungs. seeing you, he was uneasy again. he was worried if he’d be the reason for things going wrong after deciding to stay. he didn’t know if it was the best thing, to trust him.

he didn’t know if it was the best thing to trust you.

[tiredpandaportfolio]

Idle thoughts about how I write the Sparda boys.

I worked on this while waiting for BG3 to come out and forgot to post it. 

I want to ramble a little about how I personally write them, what my particular headcanons are for them. Because some of my takes differ from the official canon and they certainly might differ from the way other people perceive them.

And you know what? That’s fine. Everyone’s HC is valid. We might not accept someone else’s HC within the confines of our own, because it doesn’t line up with what we’re writing for ourselves, but it’s possible to like someone else’s take because it’s different from yours. So here’s how I write certain topics. You can ask me about others, if you’d like.

Height and Body Shape

They are truly, stupidly tall. It runs in the family. It’s a bane for their more vertically-challenged colleagues. Like, none of them is below the 6′2″ mark, not even V who is a beanpole. And with the exception of V, they’re all quite broad in the shoulderts too, they all have trouble finding clothes that fit right. 

Dante is easily the most ‘buff’ of them, with Nero looking like he’ll head that direction, but he probably won’t get that stupid big. Dante’s years of hard life and constant fighting have had an effect on his physique. He’s aware that it’s appealing and he’s got enough vanity to flaunt it, when he can. Ironically, he doesn’t always take care of his appearance. Nero on the other hand, sort of does, but only because Kyrie hounds him. Most of the time he prefers to be very casual. He tries to cut his own hair, but Kyrie has to fix it for him every time, which is why it ends up so short.

Dante’s cheap ass also cuts his own hair but at least he’s learned to do it decently well.

Vergil is the most svelte, he has the physique of a dancer... which is ironic considering he hates dancing (or so he tells himself). He is very particular about his appearance and doesn’t really like change. That’s why he always looks like he’s been wearing the same exact clothes for years and years, a fact Dante will rib him about any chance he gets. Of the twins, Vergil gets the most irritated when someone says he and Dante look alike.

And yes, Vergil is the tallest of the three but he can hardly flex on it because Dante simply looks larger by dint of being buff. It frustrates him.

Teeth

Dante and Vergil have noticeable fangs, have had them since their baby teeth fell out, which was much earlier than normal kids. They used to freak out other children, further alienating them from others. They absolutely used to bite each other whenever they got into fights.

As they got older Dante, at least, made an effort to speak without flashing them constantly and has sort of trained himself to keep them from view. Vergil, on the other hand, responded by becoming the taciturn, aloof idiot we know and love, only ever speaking freely when he was around Dante. Now, after all he’s been through, he’s simply entirely unbothered if people notice he has fangs or not. He only gets annoyed if they start to pry.

Nero’s also got ‘em, they’re just smaller and more blunt. They were not very visible when he was little and overall, got picked on more regarding his hair color and his terrible temper.

They all absolutely bare their fangs when they’re agitated or angry, but Dante will also bare them when he’s in his impish mood because he knows it unsettles others. He’s showing off and he doesn’t care. It’s most egregious when he yawns.

Senses

They have very sharp senses and an acute sense of their surroundings. Dante and Nero’s superior marksmanship is directly related to their excellent eyesight. Vergil, considering what he’s been through, has found that his eyes are very photosensitive now, which is why he avoids strong sunlight whenever he can. His eyesight is as good as ever, but he’s taken to using reading glasses only when reading, to try and prevent headaches from small print.

They all have a very developed sense of smell but of the three, Dante is the most experienced in using his senses to track things, particularly demons. He’s especially responsive to the smell of blood and has tracked down demons simply by following the stink of spilled blood in their wake. He also (unfortunately) has the strongest reaction to the smell of witch blood.

Amusingly, these sharp senses mean the boys are very particular about their hygiene. They regularly get absolutely covered in filth and while they may tolerate it and look unbothered, they really do want to get clear of the excitement so they can get rid of the smell.

How Demonic Are They?

A loaded question with no simple answer. Nero is the easiest to dissect; he is more human than demon. He feels that way and his behavior isn’t really that different or alienating, most of the time. His bad temper and eagerness to fight are entirely human flaws, something that comes from his personality and his upbringing rather than any demonic instinct. He has an easier time resisting such inclinations. Heck, he’ll resist the urge to throw down and fight if he thinks it’s a bad idea -- doesn’t happen often but it does.

Vergil and Dante are another story. The demon blood is far too strong in them. But so is the human will. The twins are caught in the crossfire of their two sides constantly fighting. Sometimes one dominates, sometime the other. Vergil was the first to embrace the demonic nature, but he did so by discarding his humanity. He did not try to come to a compromise with himself because, to his detriment, until recently Vergil did not compromise on anything. Dante went the other way, resisting and even denying his demonic side for so long that Vergil had to force it out. Even then, Dante resisted it and had to learn to compromise. It’s only recently he’s come to accept what he really is and what being half-demon truly means.

The twins are heavily influenced by the demonic side of them, their behavior affected in various ways. They both desire to be the dominant presence in any space; Vergil pathologically cannot allow anything less, while Dante can compromise. Dante is more prone to picking petty fights just to see where everyone stands, Vergil places too much value on his dignity and won’t lower himself to anyone’s level (unless it’s Dante). Vergil’s desires are more intensely focused on power and control, which is ironically very human of him, while Dante is an unapologetic hedonist when he allows himself to cut loose. They both pursue their desires with a single-mindedness that clearly isn’t human. Of the two, Dante is arguably the more ‘feral’ as, again, Vergil puts too much value on his dignity and honor.

Both twins are prone to displaying some demonic characteristics when they are particualrly agitated, but Dante is by far the worse of the two. He’s prone to growling when he’s irritated or particularly pleased, maybe even purr, and more likely to flash his teeth and allow his eyes to turn demonic when he’s angry. And of course, he will never let a challenge go un-answered.

Devil Trigger and Powers

For the twins, their demonic forms are part and parcel of who they are. If pressed, Dante might grimace and then try to describe it like a cloak: he just pulls it around his shoulders and over his head and that’s it, he’s suddenly a demon. But it’s still him, no matter what demonic instincts might insert themselves in his behavior. Vergil might disagree and insist the demon form is who they really are, but he has repeatedly proven himself wrong. He does agree on the cloak comparison, though.

The base demonic forms and the Sin Devil Trigger are two different states; the base form is the one they both use the most, as the SinDT requires a lot more power and a considerably agitated mental state to maintain. They both have upper limits to how long they can stay in demon form before they start to feel some side effects, such as lethargy and loss of control. They both have this ingrained belief that they don’t “need” the DT and only use it in a pinch, because they don’t want to depend on it and treat it as a crutch.

The base form makes them taller, bit over 7′ and considerably bulkier, which the SDT doubles down on, being over 8′ tall and really bulky. The SDT is much harder to control, even for Vergil, and they both act much more aggressively while in that state. The base form is retains some human characteristics; namely, they can speak coherently in it and their hands are still able to manipulate things outside of weapons without breaking them.

Anyone even remotely sensitive to the supernatural finds it very hard to be around them, they give off an oppressive amount of demonic power that serves that purpose: to intimidate anything weaker than themselves. They can double down on it at will as a form of intimidation-- or a direct challenge. To any allies with any amount of sensitivity, like Trish or Tess, this is not a pleasant experience.

Though both of them have wings, the twins are almost embarassingly bad fliers. They can hover and fly in straight lines with a considerable amount of speed, but anything requiring even a bit of finesse is rather beyond them. They’re simply too large and their wings too unwieldy for precision flight.

Nero experiences the demonic form a bit differently. His early experience with it felt like an extension of his arm, not quite part of him. Since the Qliphoth crisis though, he now agrees on the cloak comparison but to him the form is still a tool. He doesn’t quite identify with it, yet. He thinks this might be why it took him so long to embrace it fully. He’s the most coherent and clear-headed in DT of the three and though his huge claws make him clumsy regarding anything requiring delicacy, he can compensate with the extra arms. Funny enough, his body size changes the least out of the three. He’s threatened to brain Dante if he ever jokes that Nero is “the runt” of the family ever again.

Ocassionally, the presence of too much infernal power, or overwhelming emotion might cause them to shift partially or completely. This is a problem all three of them have, and Vergil is the one with the finer control. Dante and Nero are too prone to their own emotions.

Sleeping Habits

They’re kind of like lions in a sense; they tend to conserve their energy for when they need it. At least, that’s what Dante would have everyone believe (no, he’s not just lazy, shush). But, sleep is a fair-weather friend to both twins; neither of them sleeps fully through the night, they both prefer to sleep in short bursts whenever they feel safe and comfortable. Dante has the easiest time falling asleep, while Vergil power naps rather than sleeps deeply. Night terrors and nightmares are a common problem for them both, even after all these years. Vergil particularly has it worse, as his trauma is still fresh. Dante often finds himself wide awake, staring at the bottom of a whiskey glass and wishing it would knock him out.

Dante and Vergil are nightowls, whereas Nero is the paradoxical early bird, probably because he gets better sleep than they do and goes to sleep earlier because... well, he’s got three kids. He’s very “up and at ‘em” first thing in the morning. He sort of needs things to do or he gets restless and when Nero gets restless, trouble starts brewing. It’s best to keep him distracted and give him something to do to wear him out just so he can get through the day in peace and then sleep at night.

He’s absolutely not allowed to have energy drinks or caffeine.

Dante tends to sleep in his clothes but ocassionally he’ll go sleep in just his undies when he’s feeling tired and secure enough to do so. He spreads and takes over the bed. Mostly sleeps on his back.

Vergil is the opposite, hates sleeping in his clothes. He’ll go to extreme lengths to ensure he’s safe and undisturbed before he commits to a long, deep sleep, and he likes to wear something comfortable. He tends to sleep curled up, with his back against a wall.

Nero sleeps on his stomach, face almost buried in a pillow if he can. He likes to wear shorts and a T-shirt. Gets hot easily and kicks covers away. 

Socializing

It’s debatable that any of the three know what this even means but Nero is easily the most well-adjusted to society. He might be a menace and the fightiest, most stubborn person in the world, but generally speaking, when people aren’t antagonizing him, he’s the easiest to get along with. He’s actually aware that his attitude and even his appearance can put people off and his time as a soldier of the Order has taught him some discipline. Plus it helps that Kyrie has asked him, very nicely, to be nicer to people. And he generally is, he manages quite well when nobody is aggravating him, so long as he keeps his temper in check... which is easier said than done.

Dante has been out in society the longest, but for the most part, he’s been interacting with the seedy underbelly the most and he does have an attitude problem. He’s kind of blunt, crass and irritating even at the best of times. It started as a coping mechanism but now he’s grown into the mask so much that he has a hard time letting go of it when relating to others. He does have moments where he’ll willingly drop the act, though. He’s not heartless, if he feels someone wants to talk to him seriously he might stay a bit snarky, but he won’t go out of his way to give them a hard time, and he certainly won’t be a dick to someone in distress, as long as they don’t piss him off. Dante being serious is a good sign of two things: Either he’s taking a situation seriously, or he’s actually angry and ready to end you.

Vergil is easily the most maladjusted and unsociable of the three. He’s never liked people but at the same time, he’s never made an effort to. He’s spent too long either thinking almost exclusively in terms of power, or caught in a web of torture, brainwashing and death. Vergil doesn’t exactly dislike people, he’s mostly indifferent but he just can’t trust anybody. Dante may keep people at arm’s length, but Vergil would rather keep them at the end of his sword. He’s too used to responding with violence, verbal or otherwise. The way things are now, though, he’s going to have to learn to live with at least some people. He’ll always be an unsociable bastard but if he hopes to stay sane, he’ll have to let some people in. He’s never going to tire of fighting with Dante and Nero but at least now he can start to talk to them. He’s always going to keep others at a distance, but at least he’s learning to be a bit more civil, so long as nobody provokes him.

Relationship With Each Other

In one word, difficult. At best. They may have come to some sort of understanding, but they don’t necessasirily have reason to be particularly fond of each other. Fighting is, for better or for worse, the most prevalent and natural form of expression for beings like them. They can’t help themselves. Dante and Vergil actively enjoy trying to tear each others’ heads off even after they’ve sort of made peace with each other. Nero is less about the kill and more about the “shut up” and wanting to prove himself.

I don’t believe that Nero, at least, can so easily let go of his anger, either about being attacked in his own home, his safe haven and having his arm ripped off, or the fact that for years Dante lied to him by ommission. He’s salty and will probably stay really salty for a long time. He’s not exactly like them, he’s learned other ways to related to others than fighting and he certainly doesn’t want them anywhere near the people he deems the most precious to him. Not the way they are. He’s sympathetic, but still too angry.

Vergil has much more serious issues to work through, about Dante and Nero. In regards to the latter, he’s yet to stomach that Nero is his son, but this has rather piqued his curiosity about him, though deep down he knows they probably should stay out of each others’ lives for the moment, for each other’s sake. He wants to fight Nero again, to really test him, and test himself against the kid. But he has enough sense to respect that they’ve both been through enough for the time being. He’s much more eager to fight with Dante and as much as he likes their spars... there is a definite tinge of anger. Dante did technically kill him and has been a thorn in his side forever. What Vergil doesn’t really understand is how much their past friction has cost Dante. This is partly Dante’s fault; as much as Vergil thinks he knows him, Dante’s facade has partly succeeded too well. He doesn’t believe Dante regrets anything, and he’s convinced himself that he doesn’t regret anything, either.

But the fact of the matter is, both of them regret a lot of things. Dante is, in fact, a slave to regret and guilt. He blames himself for the start of it all, he blames himself for surviving and for never being able to stop Vergil or pull him out of his spiral, because was spiralling too. And above all, he blames himself for killing Vergil, back on Mallet island. Dante has never made it obvious to others how much that whole thing broke him. He doubled down of his facade since then and he doesn’t care if it made him insufferable, so long as he didn’t show how much that messed him up. He’s lived with that weight since then. He’s glad that Vergil is alive but he’s not allowing himself to savor it. He still wants to fight Vergil, to give him a reason to stay and not go and do something even more stupid. He is hiding from the fact that he’s surprisingly okay with the fact that his brother nearly brought about the end of the world.

In their own broken away, they love each other. Dante is struggling to find ways to help Vergil integrate into society without But Dante is probably the only one of the two with an inkling at how unhealthy their current relationship is. For them and for the people around them.

Physical Affection

This is kind of a weird one for them. So much of their interactions with each other and with others has been dominated by fighting, to the point where they’re all sort of hard-wired for it. Fighting is the Sparda love language, in a twisted kind of sense. It takes conscious effort from them to fall away from it.

Nero has the easiest time, given that he’s not as slave to the demonic instinct as the twins. He’s had time to develop human social skills and he has people he loves enough to be affectionate towards. Nero loves hugs, kisses and cuddling but he saves them almost exclusively for Kyrie and the boys. The boy is down bad and honestly, who can blame him? Kyrie is a delight. He’s usually a bit standoffish with others, but once someone becomes close to him, such as Nico, he’s a lot more expressive. High-fives, fist bumps, excited hugs and friendly nudges are common with Nero. He won’t usually initiate the hugs but if they come at him, he’ll take ‘em. He likes playing and roughousing with the boys and can spend hours absolutely rolling on the floor with them.

Vergil doesn’t like being touched, which is completely understandable, after everything he’s been through. He’s like a feral cat who just wants to be left alone. The majority of his physical contact with others, even his twin, has been violent. It wasn’t always like this, but even as a kid Vergil didn’t really like being touched much, a fact Dante could never really get through his head. But he tolerated it better back then because he still cared about the family he had. Now he’s in no position to accept physical affection, let alone initiate it. Fighting is the closest thing he can handle but deep down, there is a yearning. He misses that physical contact he did get, though he won’t ever admit it to himself. If he ever works through most of his inner demons and Dante were to ever just hug him... Vergil might crack. He would probably reciprocate. But he’s just not prepared to cross that bridge, yet. Right now, even a handshake is a big ask.

Dante is the most comfortable with physical expression, of the three. As a kid he was the most clingy to Eva, and one of the reasons he constantly bugged Vergil was to get some kind of affection from him. As an adult, he can finally read the room if someone isn’t up for it, unless he’s specifically using it as a way to aggravate people. He too is way too used to fighting as a go-to way to be in contact with others, but he’s also learned to just be affectionate without violence, though he still kept others at a bit of a distance. Finding himself in a relationship actually brought out a lot of his older affectionate nature, though he’s still figuring himself out. Once he got comfortable with Tess, touching definitely became a huge part of his love language and he’s delighted that she allows him to do so--even if he invades her personal space often. Grabbing her hand, smooth one-armed hugs and full hugs, getting and giving kisses--up to being something of a ‘bear trap’ should he be allowed to big spoon. He’s only like this with her, to the point where if she mentions it to others, she gets really strange looks from them.

Vergil’s kind of grateful that she is the target of most of his affection at the moment. It means Dante is much less likely to annoy him.

Sexuality, Gender and Orientation

I write all three of them as cis males.

Nero is Kyriesexual and Kyrieromantic. That’s it. He’s a simp. It’s kind of embarrassing, really. But still, who can blame him?

Vergil is probably demi-sexual and demi-romantic and just so incredibly picky and difficult that he may as well be a brick wall. He just detests everyone equally.

Dante likes to pretend he’s an unbothered hedonist who could and would do anyone, but let’s be real, he’s just one giant bisexual or possibly pansexual disaster and a hopeless romantic. He’s a dumbass, above all else. Don’t let him fool you into believing otherwise. And despite what street cred he’d like to have, he’s actually loyal.

It’s a bit of a mystery exactly how he got Tess to like him enough to date him, though.

[noemilivv]

hello !! first of: i absolutely ADORE your writing and just ahwhdh can’t get enough !! secondly: i hardly ever request SO BARE WITH ME ;;

i was hoping to request a hazbin hotel matchup !!

- gender / pronouns & preference; i kinda settled with not labeling my gender, but i typically use she/her pronouns !! i definitely don’t mind he/him and they/them though so i like to say my gender is up for interpretation lol. i do have more towards a male preference, but i’m open to anyone! so long as we can vibe, then i’ll be good :D

- personality; i’m mainly introverted! i typically keep to myself and i find that i get told anxious to actually speak up or try to spark up a conversation. there’s small moments where i do find the courage to speak, but it’s pretty rare. once i do get comfy with someone, i can become pretty talkative!! i usually like to let someone talk about wtv they want and from there i just go on and talk and just kinda switch from that yk?? i also looove to get to know people, in the sense that i just find it so interesting to get to know someone and understand the different layers to them!! i find that i’m a pretty anxious person. like, i tend to panic over many things whether its under my control or not. and lastly, on the off chance that i’m doing something i’m passionate about or have the confidence to actually step forward, i like to take charge and show others the things i know!!

- style; i usually wear just comfy clothes!! plain shirts, leggings, sweatpants, etc., but right now i’m finding two styles quite appealing: y2k and casual country. the former because it brings a lot of nostalgia and the way people look so confident with it is super cool !! the latter because i love boots, love the belts and hats, the cute tops and all of that and also because it’s the Texan in me

- love languages; words of affirmation will forever have me in a chokehold— this applies for both receiving and giving !! i best show my love by writing poems, speaking from the heart, and all of that cheesy stuff lol. another love language would be physical touch but more on the receiving side since i definitely would restrain if someone wasn’t comfy with getting touched :)

- hobbies / interests; looove to write!! just being able to create random worlds, stories, and characters is super cool and i genuinely love being able to come up with a variety of plots and concepts. i also love to play the piano and have been playing the majority of my life. i’ve mainly played classical music and of all the music i’ve heard i’d say Clair de Lune is my favorite!! i’ve recently found cultural anthropology to be super cool too :0 like, the different aspects of culture, costumes, even folklore and all, it’s crazy to think we’re all so different but so alike! some other general likes would be coffee, Mitski, the colors grey and blue, and penguins and longhorns <3

i’m so happy you enjoy my work!! i decided to pair you with…

Charlie !!

Charlie knows your quite a bit shy, and she knows your introverted, but she loves you and wants the best for you, she’ll try to push you out of your little comfort zone box but she’d never force you to do anything you’re not ready for

She loves the fact that you write her little poems haha, once you start doing that for her, I can see her doing that sort of thing for you

Also, she’s very eager to see what your passionate about and what you do with that, you’re her partner and she’s endlessly proud of you and she wants you to know she supports you through and through 💕

[pyrethorns]

Mistaken Night

Summary: Winter can be a lonely time of year, and it is better shared with a friend, but a quiet misunderstanding leads to crossed lips and excited yearning. A mistake is not always a bad thing. 18 +

Winter flowed over Lungmen in shades of deep gray and white. Thick clouds meandered over the nomadic city covering the moon entirely while flakes of snow trailed downward to frost concrete buildings and sidewalks alike. The crowds from above traveled in tight groups wearing heavy coats and scarves, clothes keeping them insulated from the chill of Winter. Even in the cold, the people in Lungmen continued with business as usual. Neon lights trailed through the commercial districts providing no warmth, but a little direction toward the little places where folk could find what they needed. Steam flowed from kiosks, stalls, and carts selling the local flavor of the streets and providing warmth to whoever sat down for a little word or two. Lungmen bloomed even in the snow, life pulsing even in the quietest corners. A feline wandered through the crowds at a steady pace, no one disturbing her as she weaved through the thicket of people. She wore rounded glasses covering amber eyes, a long coat cloaking most of her form while heavy boots padded through the snowy sidewalk and streets. There were a few people in the stalls who waved to her, and she gave a small smile and nod in return while passing by. She wandered over bridges with a drunken man about to tip over into a body of water, and she caught him right before he fell with one hand. As she pulled him onto his feet and dusted him off, she lectured him until the red of his cheeks had faded just a little bit, but even then he simply laughed and thanked her before trotting off with a little stumble. With a sigh, she ran a hand through her tousled hair to get rid of the snow from the orange, black, and white before she turned her tail and continued walking. The stores were brighter than ever this time of year, the warm lights pouring out of the windows glowing against the snowflakes falling all around. Mr. Lee had told her to go out and enjoy herself while he took care of business for a few days, but that had left her with very little to do. She liked working, and she enjoyed training, but his express instructions had been to take a break. It wasn’t that she didn’t appreciate the consideration, at the same time, she didn’t like being idle. No classes. No detective work. And Mr. Lee had even told her to take it easy on the sparring, so no training. She might’ve appreciated the vacation a bit more if Mr. Lee had been with her to ease some of this boredom, but he had to go off by himself on something she could have been helping with. Of course, she wasn’t bitter, not even a little, but she couldn’t help but pout internally just a bit. Hung and Aak had decided to have a lazy day, and evening, and she had gotten restless even trying to keep up with that amount of nothing, so here she was. Out and about walking through Lungmen hoping to find something to do. 

With a sigh pointed toward the heavens, she found herself ready to go back and force her friends into any sort of activity at all when she heard a crash from around a corner. Her ears perked, her pupils honing in on the direction of the sound before they grew. Waai Fu moved quietly, the snow barely disturbed under her steps as she rounded the corner into an alleyway. She kept on moving down the long alley, the only light a single lamp hanging above a door. Her steps stopped at the edge of the corner, her ears poking out slowly before her eyes looked out toward the scene unfolding before her. 

A cart sat near a wall glowing with a few warm lights hanging above it. The smell of clean oil and fried seafood wafted over to her, but what she noticed most was the fact that there were several men standing in front of the cart that did not look like customers. One of them stood at the front of the cart obscuring the view of the owner, one hand holding a knife, the other slammed onto the metallic surface of the cart. Her eyes narrowed as she leaned around the corner just a bit, the voices becoming a bit more clear as her ears focused on the words trailing through the air. 

“Whose your boss? A suspicious lookin’ fella like you out in the dark must be doin’ something shady. Either way, this territory doesn’t belong to you, and you need to pay up if you want to operate here.” Came the gruff response of the tiger making the threats. 

There was a response from the owner of the cart too quiet for her to hear, made even more difficult to hear as the tiger slammed his hand on the cart again. 

“Just selling food? The fuck you expect us to believe that when you picked such a shady location while lookin’ like that? So, how about you put down your knife and pay up for doing business in our neck of the woods?” 

That was all she needed to hear. Violence between two rival gangs could not be allowed to go unpunished, and more so if one of them was trying to impersonate a regular food cart. What would happen if someone stumbled on this expecting food only to find drugs, or who knows what? Waai Fu could see Mr. Lee chiding her with a wagging finger and a small smirk already, and could hear him clearly saying that he had told her to take a break, but justice did not rest. She opened her coat and pushed her hands through the inner pockets to pull out a pair of knives with knuckle dusters rounding her fingers and without hesitation, Waai Fu charged into the fray. 

“The fuck you mean just a chef’s knife? That thing looks nastier than the little pig sticker I got in my hand right now!” 

A loud crack interrupted the conversation, Waai Fu’s boot connecting squarely with the tiger’s chin sending him sprawling across the floor. Everyone in attendance stood in shock before they began fumbling in their pockets for weapons. She darted through the small crowd and smashed a fist into the gut of a woman pulling out a crossbow before she turned to duck a bat being swung by a slab of yelling meat. She leaped into the air with her knee raised and struck him in the chest and he crumpled to the floor wheezing now instead of yelling. The others looked shaken after three of their own had been taken down, but a rather brave girl with a short sword came charging in. Waai Fu ducked and darted, raising her fist to deflect a few blows with her knives before she returned fire with a flurry of her own. She couldn’t let any of them recover, couldn’t let any of them realize that she was only one girl in the middle of a bunch of thugs. Her leg lashed out as she turned while avoiding a vertical slice, her heel colliding with the girl’s cheek sending her crashing into the cart. When she turned again, the rest of the group were picking up their wounded and dragging them away. This was her element, this was where she thrived, and already it seemed like it was over. That being said, this wasn’t for entertainment, this was a genuine street brawl and one that she needed to take seriously. She relaxed for a moment only to tense as she turned in time to watch the girl get up, before the sword flew from her hands landing harmlessly in the snow. As the final assailant fell over, she prepared herself to face the one that would be brave enough to help her knowing that no amount of help would be enough to stop her from doling out justice.  A kindness could be repaid with a word or two at the very least. As she brought her fists up into a stance and peered at the visage of the owner of the cart to address whoever it was, her entire body froze. She frowned, the expression dipping lower as she relaxed and put away her weapons. 

Waving at her with a meek little arc was a very familiar face, half of which was hidden by the neck of a coat. She took a deep breath and while she buttoned up, exhaled, “I see. So at the center of trouble I find you, again, in a dangerous little corner just asking for everything to go wrong.” 

A little smile peaked over the collar of the coat as her friend Jaye replied quietly, “That seems to be the case. All I came here to do was sell a little food to the workers that come out the warehouses nearby. Figured they’d appreciate it, and they did.” 

Despite herself, Waai Fu smiled while leaning over the cart, “And you got mistaken for a shady individual again.” 

He rubbed his head, his tiny smile fading beyond her sight while his silver eyes peered elsewhere. Jaye was a humanoid ursus with pallid skin and hair like rain clouds rounded by two ursine ears shaded in a similar color. His eyes were always underlined with dark circles, and even now in this jovial conversation, he had a quiet and somehow dangerous aura about him. Was it the fact that his neutral stare looked so piercing? Or the fact that he held a chef’s knife in a manner that suggested he had some martial training? Regardless, Waai Fu knew that he was an honest fellow with honest goals in mind, but that certainly did not stop him from getting into trouble. 

“So what brings you around?” Jaye said, cutting through the silence.

Adrenaline fading from the initial encounter, she pushes her boot through a pile of snow while sniffing, “Oh, you know. Mr. Lee gave me a bit of time off, and so I figured I’d take a walk around and see if anything interested me in the shops.” 

Jaye set his knife down and set his arms at the edge of the cart, “So you’re bored?” 

She frowned and thought about arguing with that, before she simply sighed, “Yes. Entirely. I don’t like being idle. Mr. Lee is probably going to tut-tut me about fighting on my day off, but sitting still doesn’t suit me unless I’ve done something to warrant it.” She then scoffed, “And the nerve of him! He told Rhodes Island I was on a week of rest and relaxation so they won’t sign me on for any missions.” Her arms crossed while she shut her eyes and muttered her last bit of irritation, “He even went off on his own on a job telling us that he’d handle it on his own.” 

A hum escaped her friend, one of her eyes opening to peer at him, “Must be lonely without Mr. Lee around. Aak and Hung must be feeling the same way on the inside somewhere. You four are pretty tight-knit, after all.” 

Jaye’s passive face and small smile made it difficult to argue and fuss, so instead, she blew out, “Yeah, you’re not wrong. If we’re taking a break, then he should be too. I’m more worried when he actually takes the initiative instead of just leaving it to us, because usually that means he’s handling something that he thinks is bigger than us. That, and well, yeah. He’s kind of like family. They all are.” 

“And you’re bored out of your mind without something to do because the other two are lazing about.” Said Jaye with a nod. 

Despite her mounting irritation, she smiled while responding, “Yes. I’m extremely bored.” While tilting her head and looking toward her friend, she notes aloud, “And I can’t help but notice that you aren’t all that busy right now.” 

Jaye looks down at his pristine-looking cart and tools before nodding, “I just got done cleaning everything before I got mistaken for a criminal again.” 

She rubbed at the back of her head while looking away, “Hm, well, I saw a little cafe a few blocks back out of this corner. Would you want to go?” 

For a moment, Jaye froze before beginning quietly, “Just us two?” 

“Yes. If Mr. Lee really wants me to take it easy then I might as well enjoy my evening with someone, and well, relax at a nice place.” She said with a sigh. 

Jaye rubbed his neck while muttering, “Guess that sounds nice does seem a bit like a—.” 

Waai Fu claps her hands together before he could finish, “Perfect. Now then, let’s get going before your friend sleeping next to your cart wakes up.” 

She motions toward the unconscious woman and the discarded short blade while Jaye nods slowly and pockets his knife in his coat before stepping around the cart. That was one reason why people thought Jaye was a bit suspicious. Even when he wasn’t at his cart, he had his knife with him at all times and that thing did look sharper than any chef’s knife had any right to be. If only it were just the knife. Jaye didn’t just know how to cut and clean fish with that thing, he knew how to use it as an effective weapon in a manner that suggested he had been trained. Even she respected his skill with it, but Jaye seemed oblivious to this fact, making her wonder if the one who had taught him had done it without his knowledge somehow. Regardless, to her, Jaye was just another life in Lungmen trying to get to where he wanted to be, another innocent soul that belonged to these streets. He was a good friend, and she would treasure this evening with him, even if he seemed a bit flustered right now for some reason. 

As they stepped back over the bridge and headed onward toward the stores and lights surrounded by little crowds, Waai Fu began sifting through something Jaye had said. Lonely. Yeah, she was a bit lonely. It always felt that way when Mr. Lee was gone, always felt that way when any of her loved ones were away, but there were certain things that simple friends could not satisfy. She wanted to wake up in the arms of another during this type of cold, to sip something warm while leaning against another bare body while occasionally parting from the mug to share little kisses. Typically, she had her work to focus on, had university to worry about, and without any of that, she could spend time on overthinking. She would rather not be found drunk in Mr. Lee’s office again bemoaning her absent bastard of a father, and she didn’t want to bother Mr. Lee with her small problems, so she would find her own way to break through this loneliness even if she was annoyed with him for leaving without giving her the chance to follow. In truth, she didn’t know many people that she could relax with on a more intimate level. The Rhodes Island folk were nice but she didn’t know any of them in that manner, and well, Aak and Hung were like family to her and it would be extremely embarrassing to go to either of them with this. She wouldn’t hate it, but her pride was a fickle and stupid thing. Even now she could have asked Jaye on a proper date, but instead, she had just asked if he wanted some coffee. Now that she thought about it, Jaye probably would have been into the idea of doing something more intimate if she asked, but asking for something like that out of the blue would make her seem desperate, and it would embarrass her to no end. 

Her thoughts must have been leaking into her expression. It surely must have been because Jaye’s voice soon appeared with a gentle touch on her shoulder, “Hey, hey there. You okay? You’ve been staring blankly into the sky this entire time.” 

Hm, so she had. Perhaps she was just a little bit too into her own thoughts, and so she decided to break out of them and breathe out, “Sorry about that. Just thinking about how dull this Winter has been.” 

“Must really be that dull for you to fall asleep while standing up. You’re a bit more alert than that, aren’t you?” Jaye muttered. 

She looked toward him with a sharp frown, her arms crossed, “I did not fall asleep while standing up.” 

A small smile peeked out the collar of his coat as he pointed with a thumb toward something outside of her vision, “Yup, you fell asleep while leading the way.” 

Waai Fu followed the direction of his pointing thumb to see the cafe standing in front of them. She placed a hand on the glass door and huffed, “Like I said, I was lost in thought, not asleep. If something had happened then I would have been perfectly alert.” 

Jaye chuckled quietly, “I know. Anyone walking with you is always safe. That’s never a concern, but I did worry that you might hit your chin if you kept on looking up. Wanna talk about what’s on your mind?” 

She looked at him and thought about it for a moment, thought about actually saying it outwardly, but instead, she brought a finger up to her glasses to straighten them before pushing through the front door, “I’ll think about it.”   

The interior of the cafe was awash in styling from far-off cultures. The floors and walls were made of darkened woods, the tables a lighter sheen. Lungmen welcomed anyone regardless of who they had been or who they were, and this place was no different selling coffee from Bolivar. Alongside the scent of roasted and rich coffee, were the sweetened smells of various pastries that were displayed near the front behind a veil of glass. She could hear cups being set down, clinking with their tinny noise joined by the general buzz of people carrying on quiet conversations. This wasn’t a fancy restaurant, but even then there was a tiny woman with canine ears there to take them to a table with a big smile, and a menu each. They sat by the window together, and her eyes peered out toward the snowy gloom for a moment before she turned her attention toward ordering something. 

Their steaming mugs came not long after they ordered. For herself, she got something sweet and yet bitter, filled with chocolate and covered by a layer of cream making her wonder if it was coffee at all, but when she pulled it up to her face she could clearly smell that rich flavor waiting for her to take a sip once it cooled a little bit. She raised her eyes to see that Jaye had a similar mixture, but even from where she sat she could smell something like cinnamon. Oddly enough, there was something off about him still. He had seemed flustered when she asked him to go to the cafe, and though that had faded during his little moment of concern for her, his eyes were averted and his cheeks were flushed with just a little pink yet again. 

When about half of their mugs had been drained, Jaye asked quietly, “So, what were you thinking about?” 

Her ears twitched, and her eyes shut as she held her mug in two hands, “What was I thinking about? Guess you’re watching me just a bit too closely, huh?” When he began to mutter out an excuse, she smiled and cut him off, “It’s fine. I’m glad that you’re paying attention, and that you care enough to listen even when I’m not saying anything. We already talked about it briefly.” 

As she opened an eye to peer at him, Jaye set his mug down, fingers tapping the rim as he hummed, “Bored and lonely, was that it?” 

Waai Fu didn’t mention what else she had been thinking, but she nodded with a sigh, “Yes. That’s all. Although, I’ll say I’m glad to spend time with you. There aren’t many people that I can just sit with. Most seem to be intimidated by me, and even if you were, you certainly don’t show it.”

Jaye shrugs while peering away, “Can’t say that I don’t know what it's like with people being intimidated for no reason, but uh, well. You’re a good friend. You’ve sat with me while I’ve sold my goods, talked with me, and helped me run the cart a few times too. It isn’t just helping me out with people harassing me. You’re a good person and well, I’m glad we have this chance even if I feel a bit awkward about it.” 

She blinked and tilted her head, “Awkward, why would you feel awkward about this outing?” 

Their eyes met for a moment, and she set her mug down slowly as he reached over to grab her hand, squeezing gingerly. He got up from his seat while muttering, “Maybe you’re right.” 

Her entire body froze, the fur of her tail frizzing as he clutched her hand tight and leaned in close enough that they were just mere breaths apart. He stopped for a few seconds as if thinking about what he was doing, before he set his lips against hers. Thoughts burned through her mind fast enough that she could not process them, her heart thumping quicker for each second spent locked in this warm embrace. His thumb passing over the top of her hand added a mild electric addition to the kiss that had her trembling for just a second before she reigned it in. When he pulled his mouth away, they watched each other for a few seconds before the fluster returned to his face, red and bright. 

“Was that too much for a first date?” He asked quietly. 

Waai Fu realized the implications that he had been suggesting before, but now it was too late to make any corrections. Even then, she should make some sort of correction. She opened her mouth a few times before finally shaking her head, “Not at all, but Jaye. I think you need to understand that I didn’t take you out on a date. I just wanted a bit of company.” Before he pulled away, she held onto his hand and leaned up while whispering, “But that bravery of yours is something I will treasure this evening.” 

And their lips locked again. Firmer this time, her own passion pushed into it now that she wasn't surprised. Her other hand moved to touch his cheek still warm with the heat of the mug she had been holding. She could taste cinnamon and coffee, heat and quiet desire, salt and sugar mixing together in the loveliest of ways. Their lips finally parted with a thin clear line snapping between them. Every single sound had been deafened in the cafe during their kiss, and as they had parted, each sound began to come alive again, making her realize where they were. 

She leaned back in her seat as Jaye returned to his. Jaye unbuttoned his coat and fidgeted a few times as if uncomfortable from the sudden warmth of their interaction. She brought her mug up to her mouth and peered out the window while wondering just how stupid she was for taking it that far. He thought it had been a first date, and he thought that it would be their first kiss together, and now she had tainted it with something a bit more heated than that, but even still she wanted more and found herself smiling from the energy building within her. Honesty was the best policy. She continued to smile as she finished the rest of her coffee, setting it down slowly before she made a decision aloud.

“This isn’t a date, I never meant for it to be that, but I did think about asking you for something more intimate than that.”

“More intimate than a date?” He muttered quietly. 

She shrugged, a small smirk on her lips despite the warmth on her cheeks growing, “Like you said, I’m lonely and bored tonight, and like I said, I don’t know many people who aren’t intimidated by me. So I was hoping to ask for something that could keep me entertained until the morning, but I might’ve been a bit too embarrassed.” Waai Fu then winked, “But that little kiss of yours ignited something within me.” 

Jaye looked down at his mug, parsing what she was saying bit by bit until recognition spread across his face in the form of a crimson fluster, his mouth opening to utter, “You’d really want to do that with me?” 

Waai Fu nodded, “Why not? We’ve known each other a while, and you’re a good friend of mine.”

“And you’re too embarrassed to ask Hung or Aak.” He added bluntly. 

Her smirk turned into a small frown as she crossed her arms, “They’d never let me live it down.” She then breathed out as she relaxed, her hands again touching the rim of her mug, “So, will you play with me tonight?” 

His answer came in the form of his hand atop hers again for a brief moment. Jaye got up from his seat, fingers working to get the buttons of his coat back on, and she rose to join him. Together, they paid for their drinks at the front before stepping out in the cold again. It felt just a bit more intense thanks to the heat of the cafe, and the warmth of the moment that had visited them. They stood for a little bit just outside the cafe hand in hand, his warmth pulsing against her digits. So she had popped the question, he hadn’t given her a proper answer, but they were standing here hand in hand. 

“A hotel?” He asked quietly. 

She nodded, “That’d be perfect, but—” 

When he raised a brow toward her to see what she meant, she squeezed his hand just a bit tighter and brought him around the corner of the cafe and into a darkened alley. She pulled him just enough so they were out of sight before she clasped his face in her hands and pressed his mouth to hers. The heat that she had felt from just those two short kisses had been too much. She needed something right now to satiate her appetite before they kept on moving. That taste of cinnamon again ran across her tongue, their lips melded together as his hands began to grope and grasp along her coat. He found his way just under her coat where her hips awaited, her tail flicking back and forth as he pushed back against her kiss and dipped his tongue into her mouth. What warmth she secured was not enough. 

Both of her hands moved up along her front to undo the buttons of her coat, letting it open as she pressed closer to him. His eyes peered open wide for a second before turning back to those same tired half-moons she knew so well. Tongue to tongue, lip to lip they remained for a few more seconds before they parted once more to breathe. Her shoulders were tensed, her chest rising and falling. His hands were still at her hips trembling just a bit while her digits drifted to begin unbuttoning his coat the same way she had done for her own, and he remained still while she kissed his cheek and ear, a purr escaping her. When she opened his coat, she let her hand drift between his legs to press against the firmness of his arousal, her digits tracing the length of that growing bulge while she allowed the heat to take her. 

Coats opened, gazes locked together; she breathed in and then out. Waai Fu kept her fingers between his legs, but she took a step back and blew out, “Sorry, I got a little bit carried away there.” 

Jaye’s hands remained on her hips while he caught his breath, words in between huffs, “Apology not required, but I mean, it seems a bit risky, right? Just doing it out here like this?” 

She had to smile just a bit, her cheeks burning a bit more as she muttered, “Did you think I was going to go all the way out here?” 

He grimaced and looked away while muttering, “With how intense you were, yeah, kind of.” 

Fingers tightening around his bulge, Waai Fu purred, “And would you have tried to stop me?” 

When he didn’t say anything at all, mischief and passion began to rise inside of her as she began working the fly of his pants. The zipper came down slowly, and yet, he did not stop her. Next, her fingers pulled apart the button locking his fly together before she spread it all apart. She dipped her hand into his pants and hooked onto his boxers tugging it down to let his cock out into the cool air between them. He shuddered while she did this, while she stared at his throbbing shaft, and her heart raced. This was an act of pure indecency, but her passion had gotten the better of her, her excitement burning to new heights as she found someone to meld with. It wasn’t just that either. Jaye was normally so passive, so quiet, but his cheeks were in full bloom, his mouth ajar letting little puffs of steam out into the air. 

Quietly, she muttered, “Ask me to suck your dick. Don’t chicken out now.” 

Jaye’s ears perked, but instead of faltering, he breathed out, “Get down and suck my dick before someone sees us.” 

A small smile curved at the corner of her mouth as she crouched down, a few words escaping her with mock irritation, “Such a pervert making me do this out in the open. Any other requests before I get this over with?” 

“Lift your sweater and show me your chest.” He said without faltering. 

It seemed as though he had regained enough composure to return to that quiet and calm disposition even in this situation. Perhaps he thought she wouldn’t do it. Breathing out mist and lust just a few inches away from his cock, Waai Fu fidgeted with her coat and the sweater underneath, getting her arms through and her hands behind her to unhook her bra. She could feel the sounds of the world growing more intense, the steps outside of the alley crunching just a bit louder as she slipped her arms through the loops of her bra. As she tugged her sweater up and pulled her bra away, her chest fell free against the chilly air. Waai Fu’s breasts weren’t huge, but they were perked and just big enough to fit in the palms of someone’s hands.  

The mist flowing from his mouth seemed to increase, one of his arms tucked under his chest, the other jutting upward with his hand holding onto his mouth as if he could stifle the heat flowing from his lips. His cheeks were scarlet, his eyes peering down at her with an intensity that she had not expected. Her hand slowly grasped onto his shaft, her mouth planting a kiss on the tip. 

And with that kiss, she purred, “There’s no need to hold back. I’m strong, remember?” 

Though he shuddered again, one of his hands moved to loop digits through her hair at the back of her hair while she began her work in earnest. One claw lowered his boxers just a bit more to reveal his balls while her mouth began planting kisses along the side of his member. Each inch of heat was traced by her mouth until she got to the base. Her tongue slipped out, mist flowing from her maw as she trailed all the way back up to the tip of his cock before heading back down again. She repeated this a few times before heading down to his balls. Each orb was lifted by her tongue before she suckled on them, the silver fuzz of his sac doing nothing to deter her as she drank in that warmth radiating off of him. His fingers tensed through her hair as she did this before tightening further as she grabbed hold of his cock to begin stroking it gingerly. While her fingers moved, she pressed her nose to the base of his shaft around the side while her tongue idled against his balls letting drool serve as her lube for his pleasure. At the same time, she used this slow pace to observe his shaft and take in every little detail. Not the biggest she had, but the girth pulsed against her hand and she wondered how much he would stretch her. At the same time, she drew in the heat of his cock through her nostrils, that warmth bubbling in her core as she kept her nose to his shaft. Rich scents of coffee still lingered around him, but there were hints of salt and work there on him, of the kitchen clinging to him even under his clothes. His work ethic had always been respectable, and catching it clearly even hints of his scent made her smile as she continued working his shaft. 

The movements of her hand were slow and deliberate, gentle before squeezing at the tip. She repeated these motions even though they were out in public, even though her heart was beating just a bit faster because of that fact. Sure, it added a little bit of intrigue to what they were doing, but for her, it was Jaye’s reaction that sold this. She peered up on occasion to see him fidgeting about, the mist of his breath flowing as he turned his head to the opening of the alley before peering back down at her. Once more he looked away, and with that, she decided to speed things up a bit just for him. Her hand moved off of his shaft, her lips crawling to the tip of his cock bit by bit. She closed her mouth over the tip and shut her eyes, her body trembling while her hands moved between her legs. Button and zipper were taken care of easily, her digits sliding along her crotch to head down and between her legs to slide inside her heat to pleasure herself as she bobbed her head down to take half of his cock into her mouth. The throbbing of his warmth against her tongue sent shivers through her body while her fingers dug deep inside of herself. Two, for now, slid inside rolling and twisting against her inner walls producing little pulses of pleasure. While her eyes were closed and while she moved her mouth over his thick shaft, she couldn’t help but wonder how it would feel to have him inside of her raw. 

Waai Fu brought a few more inches of his shaft into her mouth, a part of her wanting to pull away to ask if he’d like to dip his cock inside of her cunt instead of her throat, but instead, she kept on bobbing her head back and forth with her tongue pressed firmly against the bottom of his shaft. His breaths came with little gasps and huffs, his hand at the back of her head tensed and moved around one of her ears to grip tightly before he tugged. Her nose met his crotch earlier than she had expected, but she didn’t gag, and certainly wasn’t complaining as she kept her eyes closed. Slowly, she brought her head back before starting a steady rhythm, that rhythm interrupted whenever he grunted and yanked her head back down again. Each one of those yanks was rewarded with faster movement, a line of warm pre painting her tongue making her wonder just how close he was. That little emission drove her fantasies as she thought of getting up right now and bending over for him, as she thought of the possibility of pushing him down and riding him until he blew his load inside of her. The right thing to do was to suggest a condom, but she already knew what she liked, and what she enjoyed was being filled to the brim with heat and passion alike. 

The same accounted for what was in her mouth. Waai Fu loved the heat of his shaft throbbing against her tongue, loved the feeling of his hips occasionally pushing, his fingers tightening before tugging on her ear and hair. Her pace stopped as she found her head being held in place, his cock twitching wildly against her tongue. Was he about to finish? Instead, he pulled her mouth up and away slowly, his hand moving to her cheek. She kept her tongue out against the tip of his shaft, warm drool dripping onto it. One eye opened to peer up at him, to see that one of his hands was pumping his cock against her tongue. With her fingers digging deep inside of her, with her legs shivering from the pleasure as he prepared to paint her mouth and tongue; she could get up right now and ask him to paint her insides instead. 

Right now, she needed to get up right now, but as her desires rose above common sense, his climax began. Heated cum painted her drooling tongue, her eyes growing wide before simmering shut. She shuddered, her fingers moving into her cunt faster while she collected every drop of his seed onto her tongue. Her mouth was open wide toward him, her drool dripping to the ground below them while her chest rose and fell quickly. When he finished, she looked up at him with hazy lust in her eyes. Slowly, she closed her mouth and swallowed that sticky warmth that clung to her throat, and then she rose. She stood while her fingers continued working inside of herself, her mouth clamping over his for a firm kiss that was harder than she intended. His hand remained at her ear, but the tightness could not stop her from getting a kiss to ease the burning inside of her for just a moment. 

When she pulled away with a sticky smack of lip on lip, she breathed out, “Little bit more and I would have asked you to fill me.” 

Jaye shuddered, his hand cupping her cheek before his thumb slid over her lips. As she closed her mouth over his thumb while purring, Jaye breathed out quietly, “Still want to head to that hotel, right?” 

And with one more shared glance, they separated. Clothes were fixed in haste. The cold of the evening kept away by hands held together and bodies pressed close as they stepped out into the evening again while doing their best to appear as unflustered as possible. In truth, the heat was almost unbearable now, the gentle chill of the Winter night now an icy kiss wherever she was exposed. Soon that icy kiss ended as they found a hotel to stay at. It was a bit more expensive than she had expected, or wanted, but upon seeing Jaye the worker at the lobby gave them a heavy discount. This time, it wasn’t because Jaye seemed like such a frightening fellow. No, it was because the man simply appreciated eating Jaye’s food after getting off work. A warming moment for a heated evening, but one that held little interest to her as they got into the elevator of the tall building. Twenty floors before they would get to their suite. 

They were alone under a buzzing light, alone with the cold of the Winter gone and the heat of their bodies pulsing. The second floor came at such a slow crawl, part of her had to wonder whether or not the elevator was defective as it lumbered onto the third floor. Quietly, she leaned against the wall while her tail twitched, her mouth held in a firm line while she tried to repeat to herself in her mind that patience was a virtue. That being said, Jaye seemed to be holding up just the same. His foot tapped on occasion, and his eyes occasionally darted toward her before pointing at the doors. They passed the third floor and then eventually the fourth floor, and she pressed the back of her head to the wall and looked up seeking strength in the lights. Jaye’s attention was fixed on the door now, but the tapping of his foot had become a regular twitch, and she wondered just how wound up he was. The kiss they had shared had been enough to make him hard again, and she couldn’t help but grope a few times while they were walking through the crowds. 

With a small smile, her hands began trembling down toward her pants as she leaned back against the rail of the elevator. Lust and heat dominated her thoughts as she unbuttoned her pants before unzipping them slowly. Jaye turned his attention toward the sound and his cheeks flushed scarlet as she lowered her pants and underwear enough to show the white fluff of her crotch, and the warm slit waiting beneath. She trailed a finger against the slickness, showing him the glisten of her arousal before spreading to show her darkened insides glowing against the light hanging above. 

“All that heat.” She began with a breath, “Every drop of what you poured onto my tongue could have gone in here instead.” Her digits dipped inside of herself again, one and then two as she shuddered, “I don’t think I can wait twenty floors for my own pleasure.” 

Jaye remained flushed, his words coming with the same quiet calm despite the red of his cheeks, “And did you want me to help, or should I just watch?” 

She blinked, expression neutral before she smiled. Had that been a little mischief in his tone? Regardless, she answered with a breathy sigh while pushing her fingers deep inside of herself, “You should be able to take initiative for yourself. I don’t need to tell you what to do.” 

Her fingers twisted and rolled inside of her, grinding against her inner walls before slipping out, repeating the same motions to work the right spots while Jaye watched. Part of her expected him to pull out his cock right now, and in fact, she wanted to say that he should, but what little pride she had left kept her lips clamped shut while she pleasured herself. The sound of the elevator reaching another floor came with a dull chime, that noise sending shivers down her spine as her fingers worked just a bit faster. She pulled her digits out and spread her insides for him, repeating this over and over again whenever she pulled out before she got to work again. As dangerous as it was, she needed more room to maneuver, and so she pushed her pants all the way down to her ankles along with her panties. Her fingers dipped back inside, spreading within before pulling out again. Another dull chime and her heart jumped into her throat as the doors slid open. Both of them jolted with their eyes facing the open gateway to a floor that they didn’t need to step out into, but luckily for her; no one was there. Her chest heaved, and her breath released as she pulled her shaky fingers out of her cunt and leaned back with her head pointing upward. 

“P-perhaps I should stop and think about what I’m doing.” Her voice stammered and shook into the air.

As she drew her head back down to focus on fixing her pants, Jaye was suddenly at her front with his hands on her inner thighs, his words muttered quickly under heated breaths, “Let me help then.” 

She opened her mouth to protest, but already he had moved a set of digits to hook inside of her, to push and drag at her inner walls while his lips were planted to her neck. A curse escaped her, back arching as she grabbed onto his back and dug her claws in. She made a little mental note to get him a new coat after all of this was over, and groaned as her insides were dug into. A sudden turn had him stopping, her body shuddering trying to figure out what was happening before she watched him lower himself. His mouth struck her cunt, warmth blossoming throughout her body as his tongue slid out and along her heat. His fingers still moved inside of her, a thumb pressing through the top to roll around in little circles. She could feel the pressure building, her hands that had been on his back now grasping onto his head to bring him closer, to grind out that pleasure that she so desperately needed. At the same time, embarrassment barreled through her alongside the lust. If Hung, Aak or even Mr. Lee saw her like this then she would perish on the spot, and at the same time, she knew if she were ever in this position near any of them that lust would have taken over her and embarrassment would be a far off concern.

The pressure within continued to rise, her toes clenching, one of her legs tugging back hard enough to free itself from her pants boot and all. She wrapped that leg around his shoulders and brought him in closer, groaning aloud her approval as her orgasm gushing and tightened around his fingers. He continued licking without complaint, his tongue moving to her crotch now smoothing over fuzz and leaving a cool trail of spit mixed with her arousal. 

“Ah, I can’t believe we did that.” She purred aloud. 

Her hold loosened as Jaye slipped free and cleared his throat, “Same. Maybe next time we could wait until we have some safe privacy, though? Not sure my heart could take it time and time again.” 

Waai Fu brushed strands of hair from her eyes before working on fixing her pants, struggling a bit with the leg while she grunted, “No promises, but honestly, I think you should be a bit more adventurous. You have a young lady here in such a lustful state that she’s embarrassing herself non-stop. As a hot blooded ursus like yourself, you should be making a few more commands and acting on your own desires.” 

As she zipped her pants up, she looked toward Jaye who was simply smiling just a bit, “I always find it hard to keep up with you, so I don’t think I can meet your expectations on that one, but I have the endurance to keep going with whatever you want every single time.” 

She crossed her arms, her tail curling around the elevator room’s rail while she hummed, “I suppose I’ll have to be the hot-blooded one as usual.” 

Jaye looked toward the door and shrugged, “Just be careful about going overboard.” 

Despite the tease, she smiled and settled next to him, shoulder to shoulder while they both waited for the twentieth floor to come for them. They arrived at a hall with a long stretch of dark carpet waiting for them to cross. Their steps were quiet but quick, her own heart thumping just a bit faster as they approached the room. The door opened with a beep as they presented their card to the reader near the door, and they stepped inside. She shrugged out of her coat and tossed it to the side while peering around the room. A bed near the center, a screen hanging on the wall. The lights flicked on with the same warm glow as the rest of the hotel's lighting, and the floor was soft carpet. When the door shut behind her, she grasped the hem of her sweater to start stripping. 

As she tossed her sweater down to where her coat was, she turned and looked toward Jaye, “Come on, let’s get this started.” 

Boots were kicked aside along with the socks, whatever else she wore following all cast aside revealing her toned form. Jaye gawked with wide eyes, but as she crossed her arms and smirked, he began stripping as well. Every little article of clothing was removed until he stood in the nude firm and at attention. His body was just as trained as her own, with firm muscle here and there only interrupted by the softness of his stomach. She knew that there was strength under that as well, and all of it was formed out of hard labor. There had been a few times where they had worked together with Rhodes Island on missions, so she knew that his body was for more than just show, but even still she admired the fact that this form of his was entirely for the purpose of being a simple street chef. 

Again, she would have loved it if he had a bit more fire in him, but she still cherished every second of this. She stepped toward him once he stood fully in the nude, her hand touching the top of his already firm shaft before she moved her digits to grasp his hand. Their lips met for just a second, for a kiss far too brief, and she parted while stepping back toward the bed inviting him for an evening together hiding from the Winter’s chill. 

Waai Fu sat back on the edge of the bed before leaning all the way with her arms holding her up. Jaye followed over her with his hands grabbing onto her legs, his lips moving over the top of her foot to plant pulses of ginger warmth that crawled upward as his mouth moved toward her chest. He grabbed onto one of her breasts, the other one peppered with kisses before his lips trailed to her mouth. She purred under his gentle attention, her hand grasping his cheek. Right now there was no rush, there was no need to push for an ultimate heat. They were behind closed doors and had all night to enjoy one another, but that didn’t mean she wanted to take it entirely slow. 

A gap between the embrace of their lips formed. Enough for her to nip on his bottom lip and pull just a bit, enough for her to breathe out, “Make me warm.” 

Sweat beaded her body, but the heat on the surface was nothing compared to the emptiness she felt within. She longed to be filled, longed to have his body pressed against her. To let this be known, she wrapped one leg around his waist and hooked her ankle at his lower back, her other leg spread while her hand dipped between them to feel the length of his shaft waiting to enter her. Jaye locked lips with her again, both of their hands guiding his cock to her cunt. She had already said that she had wanted him to blow his load inside of her, so there was no need for discussion right now. The tip of his shaft met the folds of her heat, pressing and pushing until she parted for him. Both of her hands moved to his shoulders, her claw pressing to his cool skin while she purred. Her insides spread bit by bit, every inch of his shaft being fitted in slowly, far too slowly. She dug her claws in a bit and he thrust forward to get the rest of his shaft inside, her breath flowing out in a hiss. He began moving at a steady rhythm, his hand at her chest squeezing gingerly. The pace was sweet and loving, gentle and ginger in a way that had her buzzing with ambient warmth. His lips made little smacks along her own, pecking and dipping closer before pulling away to breathe in and out together. 

She brought her hips up to drag him deep inside of herself, her claws moving along his shoulders and up toward his cheeks where she cupped each while muttering, “Harder.” 

And so he obliged with a jolt of his hips, his chin resting on her shoulder while her hands moved around to his back. She tugged him close, both of her legs curling around his waist. His hips had started to move properly now, each thrust sending little waves of pleasure through her that grew with every movement. That raw shaft twitched and bounced against her inner walls, her cunt tightening on him as if she were trying to milk him. At the same time, she still wanted more and so she whispered to his ear. 

“More.” 

Again he began thrusting faster, began using more of his strength, but even then she could feel his nature in each movement. He was a sweet and kind sort that wouldn’t hurt a fly. He pushed with most of his strength and jolted her body with every thrust, but he still had more to give. Was there some way she could tease it out of him, make him move as if he were fighting for tooth and nail? Probably not. She loved this heat regardless, and her own hips worked to make up the difference, his body shuddering against her. At this point, she could feel the twitching of his shaft growing a bit more violent, a steady drip of pre staining her insides. His hips finally began to move with a bit more force, his hands clasping her body close as he breathed out against her shoulder. The movements were exactly what she had been hungering for, but still there was something so sweet, so cool about them that she had to wonder what would it take to set Jaye’s passion ablaze? He leaned back for a moment, stopping while looking down at her. His hands grasped her thighs, his hips jerking forward again as she groaned and clung onto his arms. Again she cried out for more, again he kept giving her what he could. The more he thrust, the more the anticipation built, the more her desire for his seed grew. 

Just as her toes began to curl inward, just as she felt her heart begin to race, Jaye slowed down and began to pull out. As his tip slipped free, Waai Fu rumbled, “Need a different position?” 

Jaye looked down into her eyes full of hazy lust and hunger before he muttered, “I figured I should at least ask.” 

Leaning up and grasping his cheeks, she planted a firm kiss on his lips. She dug her claws against his skin, pressing just a bit as their lips pulled apart and as the words spilled from her mouth, “Cum inside of me.” 

He blinked, cheeks red, words tripping out of his mouth, “I know you said that before, but isn’t that a bit—” 

Emboldened by heat and lust, Waaifu hooked both of her legs around him and put her arms behind her head as she leaned back and watched him with narrowed eyes and a small cut of a smirk. He looked at her for a few seconds before he planted two digits atop his cock to ease the tip back down. Once it was pointed back at her pussy, he dipped inside again and stretched her apart. This time she didn’t mind that he was taking his time, didn’t mind that he was going slow, because she knew that he was doing it now with the intent to keep it inside of her. Both of his hands grasped at her outer thighs, his body shuddering as he rooted every inch of his cock inside of her. Breathing out, he leaned down to lick her chest, his tongue catching stray drops of sweat while his hips began to pump back and forth. It started with a steady rhythm, but that steadiness shook and rocked as he started pouring more strength into it, as his thrusts became quicker and shorter with every inch of his cock bouncing inside of her.

A few more sweetened thrusts, a few more pushes that had her insides grinding just right, and warm cum began flooding her insides. At first it was just one shot of the stuff, one heavy load that pooled inside of her. A few twitches passed as if he were holding it all back, his hands squeezing at her thighs as he grunted and lunged forward again, each new twitch producing thick seed that had her groaning in delight from the heat filling her. Both her arms moved upward slowly as she stretched, her legs letting go of him slowly as she reveled in the fact that she didn’t need to hold him there. Even still, she wanted more. 

Jaye pulled out slowly and sat back on the bed, head tilted upward as he breathed out. A little break? Hah, didn’t he say that he would at least be able to keep up with her endurance-wise? With a small smile, she crawled forward from her position, moving over his lap with a hand pressed to his chest. He opened his mouth and jerked his head up to ask what she was doing, but stopped as she wrapped her tail around his thigh and bit down on his shoulder. He winced but didn’t move, her tongue passing over the little indents she left where her fangs had touched his skin. 

Quietly, she breathed against his ear, “I’m not done yet, and I’d like to go at my pace now.” 

He gave her a crooked smile, one of his hands groping her rear while he muttered, “Seems like fun. I did tell you that I could at least keep up in endurance, so I’ll follow your lead wherever you go.” 

She planted a soft peck against his lips and began to grind her slit against his limp shaft. Bit by bit she could feel the pulse of it growing again as their mouths met again. Both of his hands grabbed onto her rear cheeks, squeezing and kneading them, spreading them slowly as he allowed her kiss to take him. When he was fully hard again, she brought her hips up and eased the tip against her cunt, pushing the head inside before slamming her hips down. She shuddered as she felt every inch of his cock inside of her, grinned as she heard him grunt. Waai Fu began bouncing on his lap with her lips secured to his. Her claws drew lines along his back before stopping at his shoulders to knead and press gingerly. She took the pace in the direction she wanted, quick and rough, fast and without mercy. Her insides were plowed and driven apart, her body shaking as pinpricks of soreness and delight crashed against her gut. Already she could feel the mounting pressing pounding at the back of her head, but she did not slow down. He tried to move his hips as well to help out with the efforts, and although she appreciated his attempts; Waai Fu was in control right now. 

Jaye gasped as she clutched his shoulders and held him down, her hair falling just inches above his face as she breathed out against his lips and drove her body down with all of her strength. Each movement sent colliding pleasure rocketing through her, bouncing it all about as she stopped only to roll her hips before getting to work again. Even as she felt her climax racing up her spine, even as she felt her insides tightening and growing that much more sore; Waai Fu continued to jolt her hips up and down atop his lap. Each time she bounced another loud clap echoed through the room along with a sticky smack from their combined arousal mixing inside of her being churned, the noise a testament to how much they had been going at it already, but still she wanted more. 

“I’m getting close again.” Muttered Jaye. 

His words seemed like such sweet and quiet nectar and she moved her mouth over his slowly and whispered, “Then let it all out.” 

And as she captured his lips, he blew his warmth inside of her again. Her digits grasped his cheeks to hold him in place, her sweat dripping onto him to collect with his as his cock twitched out the last portions of his load. Her hips still moved to milk more of that love from him, to take more of his seed from his body into her own, and she purred as that heat settled deep within her. When she pulled her mouth away, she watched him pant, watched his hazy eyes, and she leaned in to kiss his neck and purr. 

“That’ll do, for now.” She said quietly. 

Even though she still had energy, Waai Fu figured that a bit of rest would do both of them some good. They capped off the evening with a shower, Jaye leaning against the white tiled wall while touching his chest feigning true exhaustion. She caught his smile with a frown of her own and gave his side a pinch before rolling her eyes. That being said, she kept her tail wrapped around his leg as they allowed the water to wash away the pleasant weariness of the evening. Next came rest, and one that she appreciated as she could feel his warmth against her the entire time. There were so few people who could handle her, who could really challenge her in any way, but spending time with Jaye was comfortable. By his existence she seemed to cool the flames of her heart, and even as she watched him sleep into the world of dreams, she found that she couldn’t help but smile. The next morning she awoke stretching her arms out, the sun just peeking through the windows of the hotel room. She looked toward Jaye and saw that he was still dreaming quietly. Her thoughts turned to groping between his legs, to riding him awake since it seemed cock was up before he was. Instead, she leaned over and kissed his nose gently. He really couldn’t keep up with her, but she appreciated the attempt and loved the fact that he would let her drag him wherever. During these lonely Winter days she knew that she wouldn’t have to stay by herself so long as she could find Jaye. That being said, she would still scold Mr. Lee for forcing her on this lonely break, and for not spending said forced break with her and the rest of the agency. Maybe she’d wring him dryer than she had Jaye, or maybe she’d just give him the colder shoulder a bit until his smugness cracked. Either way, those were thoughts for another time. 

She planted another kiss on Jaye’s nose, and he sniffed before muttering the words, “G’morning.” 

[ajoytobeheld]

UK Tour: post-mortem

November 2nd, 2009

Here is an overview of our past fortnight, in the form of statistics, rubbish camera phone pictures and superlatives.

We visited these cities, in this order:

Coventry Southampton Exeter Cardiff Manchester Newcastle London Oxford Leeds Glasgow

Percentage of venues which didn’t have toilet roll backstage:

60%

Percentage of promoters which took any notice of the fact that we informed them a quarter of our band are vegan:

20%

Best related quote: “Yeh, sorry, I didn’t know what vegan meant, so I got you some nuts”.

Percentage of Sold Out gigs:

70%

We owe a huge amount of thanks to Nick Coppack of Manchester United Football Club who invited us to Old Trafford to do an interview for the magazine and have a tour. To be recognised by your favourite football club, I can tell you, is an amazing thing. It was also incredibly flattering that Nick was a proper fan of the band and came to the show afterwards and made requests. I could never tire of discussing mid-’90s league cup defeats, so thank you Nick.

Thank you to Les Savy Fav for DJing at our aftershow in London, and thank you to Wichita for organising such a spectacle. I was in a bad mood after the show due to getting punched in the face after going into the crowd and somebody wrestling the microphone from me and refusing to give it back. To rub insult to injury, after the gig they approached me and told me I was a great “modern poet”. Yuck. Who even thinks like that?

So spending the night dancing to ’90s club hits amongst good friends was an awesome tonic.

This is a picture of Stuart off of Copy Haho standing on Tim off of Les Savy Fav’s shoulders:

I had three of The Best Nights Of My Life on this tour.

1. A travel lodge, a putsch on a WH Smith and reckless abandonment of all regards of common decency.

(not suitable for platform)

2. After our Friday gig in Leeds. Dananananaykroyd, our own private disco, the first time we managed to get a DJ to play Dexys, dance offs with people I miss far too much, and conga lines.

3. Best gig we’ve ever played in Cardiff. Infront of family. It felt like a home coming. Watching members of some of my favourite bands crowd surf to our music. Silent Disco with newly found best friends and pals who’d come from out of town, alike. This is a video of us performing Sweet Dreams, Sweet Cheeks with Calum off of Dananananaykroyd and Alexei off of Johnny Foreigner.

When we all got swine flu. I look forward, in ten years time, to being able to say “I survived Swine Flu”. Hats off to Kim who soldiered on through gigs despite vomiting non-stop for two days. Hats back on to all the “media outlets” who somehow managed to spin a badly informed news story out of three caps heavy tweets I made.

Thank you ever so to Rob from Sparky Deathcap for coming on tour with us. Having him as the 8th Campesinos! is something we’d love to make permanent if we could afford to (which we can barely with 7, so we’re gonna have to get famous or something). His musicianship really adds something to us playing live, and means I don’t have to play any instruments. Something I’m very grateful for. Also, his solo sets at the start of the evening were always amazing. I cannot say enough that I think Sparky is the best songwriter in the UK at the moment, and to have the chance to play in his backing band was a real honour. I hope we get to do it again sometime soon.

Copy Haho: We’ve made friends for life. I couldn’t have dreamt of meeting four people as hilarious and nice and just amazing to be around as them. I would never complain about being in a band. There are loads of negative aspects, believe me there are, but they are far outweighed by the opportunities we have to play our music and to have a platform for the things we want to say and to create. But the worst thing is saying goodbye. You travel the world meeting amazing people. You forge really close bonds in no time at all. And then at the end of a tour you say goodbye and resign yourself to the fact you live hundreds of miles apart, and that the next time you’re in their city, they’ll probably be elsewhere, making other new friends to break their hearts. It’s like a divorce that neither side wants. And oh my god, the poor kids.

“but with XBOX Live, hope and skype I could find you in a keystroke…”

Never has this been so true as it is with Copy Haho.

Thank you dearly; Joe, Richard, Stuart, Rikki, Rob, Todge, Jason, Stan, Lewy, Ceri, Gavlar, Jason and Stacey. I love you all.

Everyone who came to this tour, thank you. Every gig felt really special, and I feel like with fans friends like you, we can achieve everything we’d ever want. Thank you for letting us be a band, and see you soon.

[kofetalesnbpdchaos-leoreaper]

What Does Life Look Like?

Chapter 1: Griefs of a Borderliner; My Mother.

I wanted to start off my ‘What Does Life Look Like?’ series talking about something. In fact I had wanted to not write something but… anyways!! It’s here now!

So, here goes… *loud whisper* nothing….

I’m a BPDer. That means I live with Borderline Personality Disorder.

I wanted to.. dive in deeply. Deeply into the depths of.. how I have these grievances & umm.. what are more my own personal experiences; a creation of shadows depicting things for you .

*breathes*

As you all know, people don’t just wake up one day & decide to grab these things . Cuz if I did, that’s just so silly?? Like… who would….

Who would want to cry inside all the bloody times?!

Cry about all day long sometimes having episodes of depressive bullshits that could last from hours to days?

Have such highhh intense emotions, where in which it feels as though I am .. in this case: grieving. The Dead?

Not a whole assed person, who’s alive and well & all that shit! No no, ahahaha, you’d definitely be mistaken . Mistaken it for the Dead, NOT ever for the .. bloody Living?!?!

I've thinking a lot lately. About how it is like to grieve the Living vs the bloody Dead peoples. How intense it is for me. How it must feel like for others with BPD too!

What I do grieve on is how much I will never ever... have that proper motherly connections. People have always been able to handle it. Haha.

But I? I jus cannot, in fact "handle it". Or "deal with it" as some may also say so.

It's like.. You're expecting me, someone who's tried to attempt at bettering themselves, finding ways to be better at approaching and shit-- keep going no matter what..? Why?

Why has it always been me ? Am I not allowed to complain? I used to says to myself, & I guess insolent creatures who barely have the capacities like the ways that I do, don't even think for a second why's it a failed dead relationship!

Don't get me wrong, I love my parents butt... IF you cannot accept one to be with an asshole of a lover or best friend-- what differences does it make if it's your own literal blood?

No sorry, lemme reframe that: Why would someone allow you to be with your abusive parents, but not with someone who isn't of your very own blood ? It's just fucking BLOOD. It doesn't mean Jack Shittingston!!

I grieve that. I grieve for not being able to have a family, it's been loong dead for me. You just aren't aware of it. Not up until now, perhaps? Huh.

I die each time I think about hugging my own mother. I just have stopped myself now, cuz mi mind's gonna play tricks on me.. again. She'll think that it is love, but the love that there is ? It cannot out weigh the pains and the horrors existing.

I can't ever talk about basic things now. It's gone too far onwards, through the mountains & high altitudes. I can't have proper conversations. A few bits and pieces are like peace through mild yet cautious common grounds. Common grounds are where the shit is calm seas. Sorta.

Unlike most, I can't ever talk about loves & shits alike. I can't speak my minds about my sexuality or my genderqueer identity. I can't exactly even speak of interesting Christian shits, so really... its all dead to me.

Sometimes I wonder. What's it like to have some kind of a relationship? With your mothers? How open are you? How does it feel like to have someone like that in one's own life? Tis not for .. those of us who're lacking them. Not us who don't have mothers. Rather those who do!

I feel so stuck. I feel extremely empty, trapped and suffocated. I don't like it but it's always just whatevers & a dash of eventuallys. The amounts of times I wasn't able to say "she's actually abusive." to those who's brain organs do exist unlike mines. I couldn't verbalise/vocalise it. I couldn't even see through it. Another thing to grieve . *whispers* it is it is..

Its true what they say, we BPDers be the grievers of what happened, and what has not happened. My soul breaks and she haunts the chasms of my dark abyss of a body. The mind. There's a whole detachment that goes on. A whole loada heaviness and sadness weighing down upon me. You can't climb up; up and leave it be. Wounds freshly seared and becoming known to me, it'll take a whole lot of an eternity to heal.

If I were immortal, perhaps I would be able to tell you the deeper differences of grieving Dead vs Living peoples. Sadly, ahaha, I am no immortal being, I am but a mortal soul who knows how to merely explain the differences.

To grieve the Dead, is to know that they are forever gone, gone far off into the Spirit Realm. Gone & always remembered. Heaviness weighs you and you cannot see them ever again. Not yet for now. Probably wishes of changes or words or things wanting to have been solved blossoms. They bloom within you. Years can go by, it can still hurt you, make you cry sometimes-- become so sad & lonely even.

To grieve the Living, is to know that they are still alive, here still breathing. Existing . An avalanche of horrors happen too, cuz you realise that there's no way things can be amended or fixed or whatever. You watch them daily, crying on the insides, detaching yourself and endlessly attempting to make changes that evaporate into the thin airs.

At the end of the day, they both still hurt. 1 where you wish shit could've changed before they passed on wards. The other, you wish to solve things & make em better-- but you've already come to terms that it's allll bloody dead. Gone away, so very far away. I guess I'd rather sit in the depths of Hell than to be alive on this damned realm & die continuously from stress & sadness. To me, grieving the Dead is far more better than grieving the Living. Cuz you don't have to die each time you hope for changes. For the Dead it isn't possible anymore to expect and hope for fucking changes. *whispers quietly* No more, no more...

-- Lena Eclipse Oriña Reaper. Leo Reaper. 29/04/2023.

[husbandohunter]

A Small Predicament [Baby Genshin x Reader]

Characters: Scaramouche, Diluc, Kaeya, Childe, Xiao, Zhongli, Albedo

Synopsis: Cursed for a week, the boys either have to live with it or find a cure as soon as possible. You on the otherhand hoped otherwise.

(A/n): It only takes ONE glance for me to start having ideas. It was twelve in the morning yall, enjoy~

Oh here's part 2

--------

Scaramouche

• "Oh you shrank? I couldn't tell-"

• Threatens that he will murder you to pieces and burn your remains but his voice was so squeaky and high pitched (voice crack) that you couldn't help but burst into a tearful laughter. 

• Its payback time  Bully him, take his hat and hover it above his head. Truthfully, without his hat Scaramouche looks like a little schoolboy. Overall less intimidating.

• Tries glaring. Cute. He's really bratty as a kid, sitting on a high chair (which you had to help him get on) and demanding his servants to do his bidding. In reality, his personality never changed. You realized that even as a grown up he still acts like this (bratty kid in a grown man body).

• The curse made his week a living hell. Signora had the audacity to pull his ear when he misbehaves. Childe constantly messes with his hair while giving head pats and the WORST of all, pinching his cheeks. Scaramouche never wanted to commit arson so bad in his life.

• Eventually finds a cure so he doesn't have to deal with it anymore and orders everyone to never speak of it again. Though, he's plotting how he'll get revenge on everyone who made fun of him using the very same curse (You better run).

~~x~~

Diluc

• "Oh…Oh my! Diluc you're just so cute!" 

• Diluc grimaces as you glomp him in this state. How can you help it? With his head so small it makes his hair all the more fluffier! His coat no longer fits him to the point the sleeves had made past his fingertips. He tried wielding his claymore again, only to lose balance and fall flat onto his bum

• (insert kid voice "Retribution!") Did I mention the babyface?

• Diluc tries to act as if everything was normal, acting like the Darknight hero and Mondstadt's Tycoon but fun-sized. He couldn't. There was no way people would take him seriously in business meetings. Same with fighting abyss mages, his smaller form was too much of a disadvantage. Thus you ended up doing most of his paperwork.

• One time you caught him sitting on the floor couldn't reach his office desk  while reading away the various books for a cure. It was three in the morning. You told him it was way past his bedtime and he argues saying when did he ever have a curfew schedule. In the end you managed to convince him and he begrudgingly obliges.

• The type to NOT ask for help even when it's obvious that he really needs it. Before he was the one who helped you reach things from the top shelves, oh how the tables have turned. He avoids Kaeya like a plague unless he was in it for another round of funny remarks. When he wanted to go out and get some fresh air, you insisted on accompanying him. Worst mistake in his life. A travelling merchant bumps into you and commented that you had a very cute son. Diluc was mortified.

• The day ended up with him sulking in his room. Although it was tempting, you resisted from cooing over his adorable form after days of treating him like a child. It wasn't because you were teasing him, Diluc just works so hard that you wanted to spoil him a bit. At least he could still play a game of chess with you.

• When things went back to normal, Diluc ensures that you will NOT see him as your son.

~~x~~

Kaeya

• "Well look who it is, my little Prince Kaeya~"

• Tries really hard not be bothered by it at all. Kaeya still maintains his suave facade, throwing in a couple of flirting lines here and there (and forcing his voice to go a few octaves too low in which puberty has yet to occur HA). Though no matter what approach, he couldn't ignore the sparkling mischievious glint in your eye. You were obviously not taking him seriously.

• Things couldn't get any worse. He lost his masculine physique and boob window, he wasn't able to go to certain places without supervision. But the worst thing of all was that he was underaged. Kaeya hated the fact he couldn't drink anymore, he even insisted you to sneak him a few bottles (which you refused) and had to settle with plain beverages such as fruit juice (what an insult). He was never really grounded since his childhood days but he certainly felt like he was grounded now. 

• Kaeya still kisses you on the lips whether you like it or not. If you ask him to sit on your lap, he will find a way to turn the position into his favour such as resting his face between your breasts. You're not gonna treat him like a kid, nuh-uh, he actively avoids it.

• Since his personality still remains, Kaeya is a naughty child. He will use his innocent appearance to sway people (even you) to get what he wants. That was how he was able to take a sip of the wine he stole somewhere (he wouldn't tell you). Diluc scolded him heavily and threatened to ban him from drinking from his Tavern for a week (they ended up arguing, Kaeya being the passive aggressive little shit he is).

• He was extremely relieved to return back to his normal form again. He has so much to catch up (specifically his bedtime activities with you *wink wonk*)

~~x~~

Child(e)

• "Hmmm to be honest, this actually suits you very much."

• Unlike the other boys, Childe was completely okay with it. Turns out that YOU were the one who was not going to be okay. If you thought taking care of Teucer was energy-draining then expect Childe to take that tenfold and beyond.

• You've officially became his full-time babysitter who is in desperate need of a raise (and rest). You can't take your eyes off of him and archons forbid that he will ever meet Klee. One point he'll be running ahead by your side and the next you'll find him getting himself in a 1vs7 situation with some shady looking treasure hoarders. Childe genuinely thinks he could take them on but the curse downgraded his abilities. You carried him and barely made out of it alive. (This made you ponder whether the best solution would be to strap him against a chair for the time being…)

• Childe being a child will eat all the candies and ice cream he pleases. You wonder if the curse also turned him a few years back or was it that he acts like this simply because he wanted to (it was the latter). He loves being spoiled, spoiled by you! Childe demands your full attention, spoon-feeding his meals, back rubs and head pats. Yep, he's definitely doing this on purpose.

• Did he just call you 'mommy'? (Childe has mommy kink confirmed).  He has so much energy that it was exhausting, you literally had to drag him away from what ever he was doing in order to get him to bed. "No Childe, your sleeping time is 9p.m stop whining." He bargained that he'll sleep if you sleep beside him (you didn't get any sleep. You knew what he was planning. In the end, you tried to make sure he didn't sneak out behind your back.)

• Finally you were able to get out of that hell-hole. Childe promised to make it up to you, you deserve it after all~

~~x~~

Small (aka Xiao)

• "Did you know in the Liyuean language, Xiao translates to small?" You didn't say that out loud. Not when he's this angry (this angy)

• He just stands there, crossing his arms and grumbling. You were hesitant to touch him in case he might hiss at you. Xiao has always been short, maybe an inch taller than you, but seeing him like this made you think 'my almighty yaksha can't be this cute♡'

• He gets mad when you no longer call his name for help. How could you? He's just so precious~ Xiao makes it clear that no matter what form he takes, it doesn't make him weak ("Adepti and you mortals are nothing alike." Or so he says but you could tell he wasn't running as fast as he used to because…small legs). You may not comment on it aloud but he can tell just by the look on your face and it irritates him.

• Also the type to not ask for help but worse. Xiao is an agressive little kid, he seems as if he'll be willing to bite someone's finger off if they try to pet him (He gives strong cat vibes, so thats understandable). His spear was too big for him to wield so he often has to put it away or else he might knock someone over with it. Xiao hates being short so you'll be hearing him complain alot.

• Since he was an adepti, he didn't need to sleep however, the curse must have brought down his power by a significant amount to the point you DID catch him napping. You almost swooned out loud just by taking a glance upon his face. For once he didn't wear his signature grumpy look. Xiao appears like a normal child, one full of innocence. His snoring was soft and breathly but that just meant he was deep asleep. (You wished to take a picture). 

• Of course, everything had to come to an end (much to your disappointment), he still complains about the incident to this day.

~~x~~

Zhongli

• How is it possible for a baby to still look so handsome? (Must be his godly abilities)

• Zhongli is unfazed by this 'curse' since his past lives have already taken many forms. Though for some reason whenever he walks down the streets of Liyue, young girls, mothers, ladies all come him was and start complimenting him and gushing over him (he was suffocating). They'd squeeze him tight or squish his cheeks, it only takes once glance before the little girls start blushing and hiding behind their moms.

• Needless to say, despite what form he is in, Zhongli is still able to get free stuff. He got some free candies and some free kites to play with. You had to help him carry his items. Zhongli ends up tripping too much because his tailcoat reached his feet (he decided to just take it off. You had to hold that too). Seems like he can have anyone do things for him in the end HA.

• He still got that drippy voice and you're just like ???? "What on Teyvat Zhongli, you're a kid." This is why you can't see him as one, its nearly impossible.

• Actively avoids Hu Tao and Childe. Once Hu Tao caught sight of him and chased him for hours, he couldn't stay in one spot knowing that she might just pop out of no where. Childe still spoils him, however Zhongli feels irritated by the fact the only things Childe buys him toys (its different when other people do it.)

• Everytime you guys go back strolling through Liyue, you had to hold his hand in case more women come swarming hin again. You swear that at this rate he might get kidnapped because hes just such a beautiful baby.

• Zhongli learned an important lesson after his curse was lifted: no matter how many years he lives throughout  never take a form of a child.

~~x~~

Albedo

• You find him buried beneath a pile of books and had to dig him out before he suffocates.

• Albedo has the cutest eyes, they're big and round full of curiosity and they sparkle too (he has the prettiest eyes out of everyone tbh). He is the only person who is fascinated by this outcome and immediately goes in the wild to test out his new physique. 

• He was always curious why Klee T-poses when she runs so he decided to try it out himself. She was thrilled to find out that she now has a little brother to play with. In the end, Albedo indulges in the games she always wanted to play but couldn't because he was too old: princess dress up tea parties.

• You felt many things when you saw Albedo wearing a frilly gown and a plastic tiara tucked on his head. Deep down you knew regardless of what gender Albedo was still pretty. Klee even had the guts to redo his hair and hardly anyone was able to recognize it was him at all. He has pigtails, PIGTAILS! You made sure to burn that image into the very depths of your mind forever.

• The only advantage was the he was ablw to fit through small spaces, other than that, being small was way too inconvenient. He knocked down a few of his potion bottles which damaged the floor (thankfully not him) because they were lethal (he wonders how Klee was able to not injure herself when using bombs). You carried him and lifted him to alot of places such as trudging through the snow because Albedo would surely fall on his face due to his small form.

• Enough was enough, he only lasted a day with this and decided to just make a potion and put an end to the curse once and for all. 

[therenlover]

One Last Night In Madripoor (An 18+ Helmut Zemo/Reader Oneshot)

Synopsis: Baron Helmut Zemo is a lonely, wanted man looking for some fun, you’re a piss-poor bounty hunter in search of a connection before leaving your life of crime behind, and fate has brought you together at a party the likes of which has never been seen before. You only have one night left in Madripoor, so why not take a chance?

Tags: Smut, SoftDom!Zemo, Hook Up, Semi-Public Sex, Drinking, Safe Sex, Explicit Consent, First Meeting, Wall Sex, Blow Jobs, Cunnilingus

Rating: 18+

Warnings: Swearing, Explicit Sexual Content

Word Count: 4200~

This fic has been crossposted under the same title to my AO3!

---------

Madripoor was a place like nothing you had ever seen.

It wasn’t that the sights were anything special. You could find seedy criminal underbellies lined with neon where the streets ran red with blood anywhere if you looked hard enough. Even the ocean view didn’t do much to set it apart from any other place visually. No, Madripoor’s scenery and architecture weren’t what kept your eyes wide with wonder whenever you found yourself wandering through the winding back-alleys without a purpose. It was the people that kept you around.

Thieves, pirates, and miscreants had been taking shelter at the docks since before anyone there could remember. It was a city borne of the underbelly of society, the people nobody sees, but you saw them. You saw them every day when you stood in the main market waiting for an easy bounty. There were faces everywhere; big and small, tall and short, scarred and flawless. No two people in the streets of Madripoor were ever exactly alike. If you needed to remember someone, their unique face was right there waiting in your mind.

After living on the island for almost 6 months, most people were already cataloged neatly in your mind as friend or foe. This man, though, he was new. He was different.

The night was still young. There was some trouble at the Princess Bar that ended with Selby dead and a few murderers loose in the streets with a price on their heads, but you steered clear. Going after the killers meant going up against hundreds if not thousands of trained bounty hunters and assassins and no amount of money was worth dying over now, not while you were so close to freedom. Instead of chasing your doom, you decided to head to your room, get dressed up, and head out to wherever the music was loudest in search of a place to forget about your problems for the night. The thudding sounds of poorly DJ-ed club remixes led you to Leonardo’s Place. That’s where you found him.

You were two drinks in and sticking close to the wall when he stumbled into your line of sight. What initially caught your eye was his dancing. He couldn’t move for shit. What kept your attention, though, was his face.

There was transience to him, like at any moment someone could bump into him and he would disappear without a trace at their touch. Despite that he was gaudy. Everything about his clothing screamed wealth and fine taste from the thread count of his obnoxious purple turtleneck to the shine on his boots. He was strange, a walking contradiction, and one who had never had the pleasure of gracing your presence or screwing you over in the past. In the simplest of terms, he intrigued you. With nothing left to lose you downed the last of your cocktail and made your way to the gap in the crowd where the stranger had staked his claim. It was game time.

“You come here alone?” You asked. Your voice was barely a whisper above the heavy thrumming of the music.

He gave you a long look up and down before answering as if he were trying to size you up. Something about having his gaze linger on your body made your heartbeat soar. “I’m not looking for company,” His accented tone was gruff but left a sliver of room for reconsideration. You took the chance. What could go wrong?

With as much tact and grace as you could muster you let yourself slip a little closer to him. “What, do I look too expensive for you?” you teased, before backing off with a grin, “Thanks for the compliment, but I’m not here for that. My job is a little more… dangerous.” As you danced, the hem of your dress rode up your thigh just enough to reveal the knife holster in your garter belt. It pleased you greatly to see this handsome stranger do a double-take; that meant he was looking at your upper thigh in the first place. “I just liked what I saw in you… do you like what you see in me?”

Somehow, your little joke had endeared him to you, however minutely. Instead of brushing you off the man paused his jerky dancing for a moment to really take you in. Then, he caved. “Would you like a drink?” He asked.

You smirked. “Who would I be if I turned down a free drink from a handsome stranger,”

He met you in the middle as he offered you his hand. “I never promised it would be free,”

So, the two of you found yourselves at the bar, bodies leaned into each other and away from the rest of the sweltering crowd as the bartender slid you your order. The stranger was drinking a brandy straight while you opted for a sidecar. It was enough alcohol that you were starting to feel pretty buzzed, but you still felt in full control of yourself. You took a long sip before speaking. “So, what should I call you?”

It took him a moment to respond but once he did, he seemed sure of himself. “You can call me Helmut, but Baron is fine as well,”

You cocked up an eyebrow. “Is that a nickname?”

“More of a title,”

He took a drink as you gawked. “Like royalty?”

“Not like. I am,”

Your cheeks flushed. The rational part of your mind was so stunned by the ease with which Helmut lied that it seemed to short circuit completely, leaving you very puzzled and more than a little intrigued. “Well, pardon me, Mr. Baron. What’s royalty like you doing in a place like this?”

“There are plenty of reasons a man like me would have business here. A woman as beautiful as you, though… not so much,” he waved his hand in loose gestures as he spoke, “Why risk your life and beauty for this? A life living in the underground where you cannot so much as dream of seeing the stars?”

You finished your drink in one large swig. It burned down your throat but you relished in the pain. “Not all of us are lucky enough to be born in a place where we can see the stars. Funny enough, though, I’m just about to get out,”

“Is that right?”

“I finally saved up enough money from small jobs to buy my way out from under the Power Broker’s thumb,” Something about the way Helmut smiled at you made you feel safe. It was like you could tell him your worst, darkest secrets and not feel an ounce of fear or guilt. “I’m nothing special here, a small-time bounty hunter, and I kept it that way for a reason. I’m not valuable and I don’t know much. If I just pay my dues and keep the money coming until I can get their claws out of my back, I should be free to leave with a freighter tomorrow morning,”

Helmut was quick to respond. “Ah, travel by freighter. It’s terribly dangerous to be a stowaway, you know? Impossible to predict quite what the seas will be like,”

“Well, that’s just a risk I’ll have to take to get out of here and stop… what was it that you said I was doing? Risking my life and beauty?”

The two of you chuckled as Helmut took one last drink to empty his glass. Then, the conversation stilled. Around you people were alive, gyrating to the music as their pulses thumped to the beat, but it was like they weren’t even there. Instead, your whole being was focused on the strange man in front of you who had stolen away your sensibilities with his cool tone and thick accent. He made you feel alive. No, more than alive. Every color was brighter, every sound was sharper, every sip of your drink was crisper. He was a once-in-a-lifetime man, and this was a once-in-a-lifetime night. Oh, to hell with it!

“I like you, Baron,” you purred, pressing yourself close to him. His breath hitched the moment you touched him. He acted as if it had been a very long time since he was last touched like that. “And I think you like me too. In fact, I think you like me enough that we should take this conversation somewhere a little more private. What do you say?”

He didn’t respond. Instead, his gloved hand made its way around your wrist, and in a moment’s time, he was pulling you across the crowded dance floor towards a small, secluded hallway. You assumed that meant yes.

The instant you made it to the shelter of the shadows Helmut was on you like a man starved. One of his hands was quick to explore the skin just above the hem of your dress as the other pressed against the wall, caging you in and holding you as a more than willing hostage to his affections. He didn’t kiss your face, and you weren’t complaining about that, but he did put his mouth to good use sucking a dark bruise into your collarbone. His ministrations only stopped when a high, keening sound escaped your lips.

“You like that, don’t you, meine kleine schlampe?” he growled through gritted teeth. Something about his tone turned your already weak legs to jelly. The second you went limp in his grip, though, he pulled back. Straightening himself out, he offered you a steadying arm. You took it without hesitation. “I’m terribly sorry to be so rude. I assure you that I am not usually the type of man to hook up with someone on a whim, I’ve simply been… indisposed for many years and haven’t had many opportunities for pleasure, especially not with a woman as beautiful as you,”

His compliment was enough to have you blushing like a schoolgirl. You had killed more people than you could reasonably count, and probably fucked even more, but something about the way Helmut looked and sounded and acted made you feel almost innocent to his advances. He was a drug and you needed to get your fix before he disappeared forever.

“Does that mean you think I’m special?” You asked, all doe eyes with an innocent smile. Helmut ate it right up.

“Yes, schatzi. Very special,”

You hitched a leg up, letting your heel dig into his expensive dress pants and drag him closer to you once again. “First your little slut and now your little treasure? Which one is it, Helmut?”

“And so smart,”

“Move, Baron!”

At your insistence, Helmut was on you once again, leaving a trail of hot, wet kisses down your neck as he fiddled with his gloves, yanking them off and shoving them in his back pocket before he continued. “So demanding,” he chided, and yet he continued to lavish you with affection, his hand climbing higher and higher up your thigh. Your back was pressed flush to the wall now, and you were painfully aware of just how warm Helmut was. He smelled like a rich man’s cologne and yet his skin tasted of cheap soap when you leaned in to give him a bruise of his own.

“You love it,” you replied. He let out a husky laugh.

“I suppose I do,” he chuckled, and then his fingers brushed over your core. Your knees buckled. Helmut kept you upright with his body as he continued to taunt you through your underwear, but he seemed more confident now, almost cocky. “My needy schatzi, have you no patience?”

Your response was breathless; a confession.

“Not with you,”

Something about your words lit a fire in Helmut’s eyes. In an instant he had your leg hiked up while he ground his hardened length against your clothed wetness. Your mind went blank. He felt big. A mindless whimper fell from your lips.

“How do you want me?” Helmut asked. As he spoke he ran a light finger down your elevated thigh. You offered up another whimper. “I’ll need you to use your words and tell me what you want or I can’t give it to you,” His tone had you wet enough that you worried you were dripping.

With a gulp, you managed to fumble out the words. “I’ll blow you first if you promise to fuck me,”

That had him grinning like a wolf. “Perhaps you are my little schlampe, so eager to get down on your knees for me…” And you were. Even on shaky legs, you found yourself happily falling to your knees as the Baron fumbled with his fly. It was only then that you found yourself gazing down the hall towards the cacophony of lights and sounds and people maybe 20 feet away from your hiding place in the shadows. As if he could sense your discomfort, Helmut paused. “Are you alright?”

You nodded quickly. “I just forgot we were out in the open for a second,”

“Do you want to stop? If the location is the problem, I would gladly pause so we can find a new hideaway,” he stopped short, looking down and meeting your heavily lidded gaze, “or perhaps the idea of putting on a show excites you?” Your heart jumped out of your chest. Helmut noticed. “Well, if my little schlampe is so keen on putting on a show, she should get a move on,”

That was your cue to get to work. In a swift motion, you finished unzipping his fly and shifted his boxers, letting his lovely cock spring free. It was a pleasant penis and far as they went, average in length but thick with a leaking purple tip at half-mast. Just looking at it made you clamp your legs together.

Slowly, you gave a tentative lick up the underside of his length. He felt heavy on your tongue in the best of ways. Helmut jerked upward, a man possessed. You couldn’t help but laugh. “It’s been a long time, huh?”

“Less talking, more working little schlam-” you cut Helmut off quickly by taking most of his length into his mouth. That seemed to shut him up. His wolf-like grin had dissolved into a slack-jawed mess the second you started to suck him off. Oh, this was going to be fun.

For the most part, the Baron let you set the pace, bobbing your head and taking as much of his length as you comfortably could, but after a short while his hands were buried in your hair as he fought the urge to buck into your throat, hard. With a particularly rough snap of his hips, Helmut pulled away.

“You are an angel from heaven, schatzi,” he groaned, pulling himself slowly from your mouth as you got your first good deep breath in a while, “but a deal is a deal, and it wouldn’t be quite fair if I got to have all the fun, now would it?” Your breath hitched in your throat. Finally time for the main event.

Helmut was surprisingly gentle with you as he offered you a hand and helped you back up, only pausing to wipe a line of dribble off your chin with his thumb. With anyone else, it would have felt wholly humiliating but with Helmut… well, it did things to you you would rather not admit. You quirked up an eyebrow, though, when he got on his knees in turn, mirroring your past position. “What are you doing, Baron?”

“I simply assumed my sweet schatzi would enjoy a reward for taking my cock so well,” his words had you biting your lip as your cheeks flushed, “now be a good girl and take what I give you. I want to hear those pretty noises you made earlier,” With that, his face disappeared under your skirt. He pulled down your panties and… snickered?

“What now?” you groaned, squirming as his hot breath hit your exposed nub.

“You’re sopping wet,” he replied. Out of habit, you moved to shut your legs but found Helmut’s large hand was holding them open. “I do enjoy being sandwiched between your thighs, but you shouldn’t hide yourself from me. Take your pleasure. You’ve earned it,” That was when he began his assault on your folds.

You had been with plenty of partners over the years, all with varying proficiencies when it came to giving pleasure, but no one had ever made you feel quite as good as Helmut did while you gripped his hair and rode his face with reckless abandon. He always hit just the right spot, alternating between sucking on your sensitive clit and running his rough tongue in sloppy circles against it. In no time flat your pleasure was building toward’s its peak as your knees trembled.

“Helmut,” you squeaked, “Helmut I’m gonna cuuuUUOH!”

You were suddenly thrown over the edge of pleasure as the Baron worked you open with his fingers, pressing that spot inside of you just right. It was a revelation. Nothing would ever compare to him and you hadn’t even fucked yet. Once you had regained some semblance of stability he emerged from his place between your thighs, face slick with your juices, wearing the expression of a cat that got the cream.

“You make such lovely sounds for me, schatzi,” Helmut groaned, rising from his place at your feet and reaching into his pocket. While he fumbled for a condom you took the time to actually remove your panties, lifting one shaky leg at a time before balling them up and tossing them on the ground. You could grab them later. Or not! In all honesty, your ruined undies were the last thing on your mind as your watched Helmut roll the condom onto his proud cock, pumping himself a few times. “Now, are you sure you want this?”

You had never felt more sober in your whole life despite the drinks you’d downed earlier.

“God, yes,”

“Wonderful,”

He caged you into his body once again, lining himself up on your slick folds, and then with a pronounced bite against your collarbone, he was entering you. It wasn’t painful or uncomfortable, you just felt full, like a missing piece of your body had been completed. For the first few thrusts, you were too blissed out to really take note of anything around you, but once you tuned back into the world of the living you realized Helmut was talking. Well, babbling was more like it. He seemed to simply be speaking his stream of consciousness into your ear as he pistoned in and out of you like a madman. There was a jilted rhythm to it, but the abnormality kept you on your toes.

“I won’t be letting you go any time soon, schatzi, and definitely not on some dank freighter like a rat from the gutters. No, you will travel with me. Once I help my friends and slip away from the front lines I can take you anywhere your little heart desires. Paris, Vienna, Australia… Mein Gott, what a sweet cunt,”

Any sane woman, after hearing his sex-drunken musings, would have run. They would have heard the wild ramblings of a madman and left after their little fling was done to never see him again. It was only rational. He didn’t even know your real name. Sane women didn’t run away with strangers claiming to be barons they hooked up with in a seedy club selling stolen Van Goghs in a hub of the criminal underworld.

The only thing was, though, that you weren’t a sane woman.

You were a killer, a child left in the streets to live or die who had scraped themselves together and dragged themselves towards life. So what if the idea of some rich mysterious benefactor with a good dick coming in to save the day sounded fantastic? It was fantastic. Like your own personal version of Pretty Woman. Even if he wasn’t as rich as he claimed to be, being poor and getting dicked down by him was better than being poor and alone.

For just a moment, and with no regrets, you let yourself get lost in the fantasy and just let go.

It was as if Helmut could sense a difference.

“Are you close, little schlampe?” He gasped, letting his thrusts take on a faster staccato rhythm.

You could do little more than moan and nod as he pounded you into the wall. That seemed to be enough for him to get the message, though.

“What a good girl,” he purred. His mouth was so close to your ear, his hot breath tickling the sensitive flesh with each heaving breath he took. As he chased his own climax, he brought a hand between your bodies and rubbed tight, wet circles around your clit. It was already sensitive, your body was only barely recovering from your first orgasm, and yet something about the overstimulation was thrilling, like racing towards an impossible dream. With a shout, you came for the second time, melting into Baron Helmut’s arms as he quickly followed.

The two of you stayed there, slumped against the cool wall and still connected by your dripping sexes, for a few moments, breathing heavy. Surprisingly, you were the first to speak.

“Wow,” you breathed, letting a soft laugh escape your lips.

Helmut returned the sentiment. “You were wonderful,” In a strange moment of intimacy, he pressed a gentle kiss to your forehead, but then he pulled out, tying off the full condom and tossing it to the ground as he tucked himself back into his boxers and zipped up his fly.

“Are you just gonna leave that there?” you made a gesture towards his litter.

“They have janitors,”

A burbling laugh escaped from your lips. “That they do,”

Back in the main room of the party, the crowd had only grown larger as the night progressed. Nobody had seen you, nor had they noticed your cries as they danced and drank and made merry under the neon lights. You were, for all intents and purposes, invisible at Helmut’s side. Within and without. There was something exhilarating about knowing he was the only one that truly saw you in a room packed with hundreds. It was like something out of a twisted fairytale.

“So…” you broached the subject gently while you pulled down your dress to protect your modesty, “Did you mean what you said back there about Paris and Vienna, or…”

“Oh, you heard that?”

You snickered. “It was pretty hard not to with you breathing in my ear,”

“I apologize,” he leaned against the wall beside you, shoulder to shoulder in the darkness, “but yes, I meant what I said. I-”

Suddenly, from down the hall, a booming voice interrupted your moment.

“There you are!”

“Goddamnit, Zemo, I thought we told you to stay low not hire an escort,”

There, at the mouth of the hallway, stood two massive men. They were obviously displeased, and though their faces were obscured by the lights you could tell you weren’t the one they were after.

They called him Zemo… where had you heard that name before?

Helmut stepped away from the wall with a shrug. “At least I didn’t cause a scene by forgetting to put my phone on silent,”

The larger of the two men stayed where he was, while the other walked to meet the Baron in the middle.

“I swear to God, man, you’ve gotten ten times more insufferable since I learned you were rich.

The Baron shrugged. “It comes with the territory,”

“But you don’t have to be such a jackass about it,”

You felt it was a good time to chime in.

“Thank you so much for that, Helmut, but I think I should give you guys some privacy,” you said, straightening out your dress and walking deeper into the hallway. There had to be an exit somewhere…

“Wait!” When you turned, you found Helmut rushing to meet you. The men in the background looked shocked and almost smug. “Save your money. Meet me out at the airstrip tomorrow afternoon if you feel like seeing me again. If not, know that the Power Broker doesn’t let go of assets cheap, and you just slept with a man with a million dollar bounty, so buying your freedom isn’t an option. If you want to go without me, you’ll have to hitch a ride on a cargo ship but not as a stowaway. Working for your keep is the best way to stay under the radar. Nobody can touch you once you’r-”

You cut him off by pressing a finger to his lips. “I’ll see you at your private jet, Baron,”

He smirked. “So you will,” With as much gusto as a man could muster, he returned to his companions but not before offering one last goodbye. “Farewell, schatzi, until tomorrow,”

As you leaned up against the wall once more, you watched them go with a twinkle in your eye.

“Who was that?”

“None of your business, James,”

“Guys, what the hell did I just step on?”

“I believe that was my used rubber,”

“ZEMO!”

-------

a/n: I hope you enjoyed the filth! I haven’t written for Zemo before, even though I’ve loved him for years, but he’s definitely going into my main rotation now. If you have any ideas, send them my way! I’d love to fill the void, because there just aren’t very many Zemo x reader fics out there. If you enjoyed this, maybe reblog or leave a comment! I’d love to hear your thoughts. Thanks again!

Please do not post my works to any other sites, thanks! <3

[koraki-pharmakis]

10 Myths About Hellenismos

Today, let's address some popular myths (and the truths) about Hellenismos and its deities. Not very surprisingly, most of these things come from Wicca or Christian colonization. You can believe these things if you want, they just aren't from the religion.

Myth 1: Deity work is dangerous

Truth: Deity work, in Hellenismos, isn't any more dangerous than worshiping the Christian god is supposed to be. This notion didn't originate in Hellenismos, and is also a largely neopagan idea. Our theoi aren't monsters or aggressive. They won't kill you over tiny mistakes. Just respect them, do what you can, and you'll be fine.

Remember that even in the mythos, people aren't smited for the wrong offering. They're smited for blatant and deliberate disrespect, which by nature can't be done accidentally.

Our deities genuinely aren't easily angered. They wont be mad if you reach out to them, if you confuse them for something else, if you give them the wrong offering, etc.

Myth 2: You need to look out for entities impersonating deities

Truth: Again, this isn't remotely from Hellenismos. Our gods cannot be impersonated by evil entities. Frankly, we don't really have entities with that desire or power in the religion. If you're contacting a Hellenic deity, and you get an affirmative response, you contacted them. The idea you didn't, or that something else is lying to you, is from outside the religion. Our deities are more powerful than random ghosts, and our religion doesn't have that concept.

Myth 3: Hekate is a moon goddess/crone

Truth: Hekate is associated with the moon, but she is not a goddess of the moon. She is the goddess of one lunar phase--the dark moon, which is on the eve of Hekate's Deipnon. She is also not a crone goddess outside of neopaganism and Wicca. Historically, she was depicted as a maiden. Her triple form was also not maiden/mother/crone, simply a triple maiden-esque figure.

Myth 4: Hestia gave her seat to Dionysos/Apollon took Helios's chariot

Truth: Honestly, it's just a difference in counting. Some deities were and weren't Olympians depending on time, culture, and locations. No seats on Olympos were "given up," it's just that sometimes one is there and sometimes the other isn't.

As for the chariot, no. Apollon didn't replace Helios. They were synchronized, but Apollon didn't "take" the chariot, and Helios was never removed. Helios is still the sun--his name is literally "sun."

Myth 5: The myths are history/Hellenic Polytheists believe in the myths

Truth: The characters in myths are real to us, and some myths are literal, but in general, Hellenic mythology is not meant to be taken fully literally. Most of it is symbolic. Additionally, a lot of the r*pe in the mythos is translation errors. We believe in our heroes and our gods, and we believe there is truth in the myths, but no, our mythology isn't like Christian mythology--it's not expected or really encouraged to believe the myths are strictly true history. The myths aren't even consistent over time and location, so it's simply impossible to believe in all of them at once. But no, our gods do not act the way they do in mythology. Myths are by and for mortals, and do not capture the divine.

Myth 6: It's disrespectful to dress up as or write fiction about the gods

Truth: This is just ridiculous and ahistoric. The majority of Ancient Greek theater was deity cosplay and fanfiction. I said what I said.

This can definitely be done disrespectfully, but isn't inherently disrespectful. You also aren't required to represent the theoi fully accurately in this.

Myth 6: X god is Y orientation/gender

Truth: While you can certainly theorize our theoi's sexuality, and none of our gods are cishet by modern standards, none of the gods can only be interpreted as one gender or orientation. The terms we ascribe to them are based on mythos, portrayals, and modern interpretation of historic social roles.

The most common of these theories are maiden goddesses as aroace (ie. Hestia, Athena, Artemis), erastes (top) gods as bi men (ie. Zeus, Apollon, Patroklos), eromenos (bottom) gods as gay men (ie. Ganymedes, Hyakinthos, Akhilleus), and Artemis as a lesbian.

None of these are wrong, to be clear. It's just not as simple as using our modern labels for them. Erastes and eromenos were both considered straight in Ancient Greece; being a 'virgin' didn't always mean celibate; Artemis can be interpreted as bi, lesbian, and/or aroace based on her myths. You can interpret them however you like--I certainly interpret my gods as queer--but there is no single right answer.

Myth 7: You need a patron or to be devoted to someone, or can only have one patron/be devoted to one god, & devotion is an oath

Truth: Patron deities are more of a principle in neopaganism and Wicca than in Hellenismos. Worshiping the theoi does not require you to find a patron or devote to a deity, ever. Patronage is not particularly important or common, unless you are thinking of a patron god of a trade (ie. if you're a blacksmith your patron is Hephaistos).

Devotion is also not exclusive, and never requires an oath. Oaths in Hellenismos are extremely serious, and should never be taken without extreme caution. If you aren't willing to die if you break the oath, don't make it--find something else. You probably wont die, but that's the necessary level of certainty. Devotion, while serious, is not as serious as being oath-bound. You can be devoted to multiple deities, and devotion can be called off if needed. You can't really call off an oath.

Myth 8: X god is a r*pist!

Truth: Please stop it. Just stop it. No. Especially if you're basing that on Lore Olympus. The mythology isn't fact, weird inaccurate mythology fanfic written by someone who doesn't know anything about the myths isn't fact.

The mythology isn't straight up history. The myths were often mistranslated (the Greek word for r*pe didn't just mean r*pe) and they aren't facts. They were also products of their culture. So. No. They are not. And their worshipers aren't r*pe apologists.

Myth 9: Titans are evil and/or Olympians hate titans

Truth: Titans are fine. Really. They're not evil, they're not going to hurt you. They're just another kind of Theoi. Many of them were actually a large part of the historic religion. Hekate's Deipnon was a monthly festival, after all. And no, Olympians don't hate titans. Remember the point about myths not being literal.

Myth 10: The gods are jealous

Truth: No, the gods will not be jealous if you worship another god. They wont be jealous if you worship another pantheon, or if you need a break. If you're a god consort, they won't be jealous if you're interested in other mortals or deities. If you're a devotee, they won't be upset if you devote to other deities.

The most jealous a god gets is upset if you break an oath, promise, or agreement with them. If you promised them a daily libation but skipped it for another deity without permission, they may get upset. But even then, that's not really jealousy.

Myth 11: If you work with X deity, you can't work with Y

Truth: This is usually based on rivalry in mythology, and isn't true at all. Related to the above jealousy point, no deity in real life hates another deity, especially not enough that if you worship both they'll be upset. You can worship Aphrodite and Persephone. You can honor Hera and Leto.

Most of these gods are actually happy if you honor other theoi. Many of them are family, or share domains.

If enough people are interested, I might make a part two, because this is barely the tip of the iceberg. RBs welcome from pagans and non-pagans alike.

[leschanceux]

they've never had a fistfight with each other. it's unusual, when philip thinks about it long enough; the other boys he'd shared dorms and classes with seemed to have had physical fights with their siblings, and yet philip could never recall a single instance where he and henry or bea had ever laid hands on each other for more than a shove to a shoulder. not that they'd be allowed to - it was barely acceptable to some that they sometimes devolved into hurtful words.

it hasn't made them the paragon of siblingship, as intended. it's made them repressed and bitter with each other, relying on sharp words and cutting statements and cold silences - like the rest of their family - to get their point across. sometimes, philip thinks a good old-fashioned wrestling match would clear the air, but gran didn't even like them playing rugby on the lawns together in the summer. too boisterous, she'd said --- not dignified, but he doesn't know if that was the way they were rolling around on the grass together with dad or whether it was the way they were all howling with laughter.

( sometimes philip wonders if she was just sour that she wasn't able to join in. )

he notes how stiff henry's become as the hug drags on, the rejection curdling in his stomach as he begins to think about letting go, accepting the fact that their relationship is nothing more than two men who share the same blood. they don't even look that much alike - put them together in a room filled with people who have never seen pictures of them together ( how? ) and they might not even be able to pick the two of them out as brothers. it... it's strange how much that thought bothers him, actually.

they used to be so close - close enough that hugging his younger brother never felt so much like hugging a stranger before, close enough that he wouldn't have to question every single thing he's ever thought about since he was eighteen - but there are enough memories between the two of them that philip's sure that he can find something in the man in his arms that he can still relate to. he remembers being henry's age, after all.

he's about to give up and release his brother, mentally preparing himself to be blanked until their mandatory christmas celebration ( church service and dinner, at least ), when henry lets out a sob and leans in --- and suddenly philip is inwardly panicking and left holding a ticking timebomb. if dad was still here, he could've at least hot potato!'d henry onto someone who might actually know what to do or say in the face of such high emotions. as it is, philip instinctively curls around henry, holding the younger man with his entire body, one hand cradling the back of the golden head, the other arm wrapped around henry's back to keep him as close as he can manage.

"hen, i-" he begins, sounding uncertain for once in his life. not a good feeling.

his teeth click as he shuts his mouth, works over what he wants to say.

"i'm sorry, hen." a bit abrupt, maybe, but it's as good a place as any to start with. he shifts a little, still holding henry so close, supporting his head like mum had said when he was just a baby and philip had been allowed to hold him. "it was never my intention to make you feel like you have to be alone your entire life." he just wants to know that his brother - his baby brother, the brother he'd fought so hard for - was going to be safe. but how can he tell henry that and not come across as some overprotective idiot --- or worse, a condescending prat?

henry does not dare ever let himself think about how different their world would be if dad was still alive . dad didn't care that he was gay . henry knew that and they all knew that their dad was the one who would fight their gran tooth and nail . he would stand between all four of them , mum included , and gran and it would take an actual army to get him to move . or , as it turned out , cancer . but dad wasn't there , and mum had vanished into her rooms and it felt like they were all just fighting ( and failing ) to keep their heads above water .

philip was never physically intimidating , they had never really fought like that though it had simmered under the surface like something that could have happened. so , when he steps forward , henry flinches away . he can't help it . fear spiking through his bloodstream so fast he feels cold and sick and he's ready to try and defend himself and . . .

and that's not what happens.

strong arms are wrapped around him , and his face is pressed against his brother's shoulder before he knows what's happening . philip , who he was so sure hated him , and yet in that moment he's holding him so tightly like he is worried henry's about to slip away on the wind . philip didn't look like dad , which was why he and philip didn't look very similar , but suddenly henry realises that he smells like him . when did philip start wearing the same cologne? henry isn't sure , henry would never have known they just haven't been that close .

suddenly he's flashing back and he remembers the first time he fell off his pony and pip who coaxed him back on , he remembers leaning so far over his brother's arm as they took off one one of many flights so he could see out of the window and pip explained how the wings worked , he remembers when pip let him use his gameboy for the whole afternoon when it was raining in balmoral and they had nothing to do .

henry didn't realise he was still and rigid in his brother's arms until something inside him snaps . a sob escaping out of his chest and he sinks into his brother's hold . forehead pressed against his shoulder , arms wrapping around his waist and bunching the back of his suit jacket in white knuckled fists . his life spreads out before him , cold and lonely , and it terrifies him . it makes his already broken heart shatter more because he wants to be himself . not loudly or aggressively . just quietly . just in his own space he's carved out for himself but all this has told him , as beaten home , is that he will never be allowed.

he feels like he's grieving all over again .

or maybe he never stopped .

philip is going to hate the tears that he's let soak into his suit . he's going to think that the way his body shakes and his breaths come out in quiet gasping sobs was pathetic but henry can't get himself to stop . philip's hug feels entirely like dad's used to . and it breaks something in his chest as much as it puts him back together again as he sobs into his brother's shoulder over the life he is not allowed to have .