#soda writes

[25centsoda]

22323 1

Until yesterday, I had never experienced what Michelangelo did — I was never able to see through the clay and into what it was meant to be. But yesterday, I held a bird in my hand, like god: I just had to take the red, warm earth in my hands and pull its winged form into the open air.

[sodapopper]

Ponyboy is like “Darry ALWAYS yells at me but NEVER yells at Soda! I don’t understand!! Why??!”

…because you yell back, my guy. Whereas Soda just cries.

[stinkygirl009]

cuddling hcs for the greasers?

YESSSS!!! Omg I’ve been thinking about this non stop!

Dallas Winston:

Dally doesn’t feel comfortable with hugging you in public, he absolutely DESPISES people who are cuddling and all that lovey dovey crap while there are people around. But he will only do it if you are some-what alone or no one’s lookin, And he’ll have his arm thrown over your shoulder, and say something like-

“Your perfume smells good.”

Johnny Cade:

Johnny has never had any physical touch with anyone, without it having to deal with violence. But when he gets comfortable with you he starts to give small gestures like holding hands and leaning his head on your shoulder. But again like the rest of the guys, he only does this when he’s alone with you at the lot and have his arms around behind you and let you talk about what ever was on your mind<3

“I’m still listening’, go on.”

Ponyboy Curtis:

I know what you’re thinking, “THIS BOY DOESNT EVEN KNOW WHAT CUDDLING IS-“ But that’s ok, because you teach him how to! Then eventually he would have you in front of him on the ground or the same couch and have his arms wrapped around your shoulders, while you read out loud a book that you both are reading<3

Ponyboy: “You skipped a sentence.”

You: “If you critique me one more time-”

Darry Curtis:

He might be tuff looking but trust me he’s huge on cuddling with you! He’s such a softie when you guys are cuddling and I’m not even kidding. He usually likes when you lean against him and your snuggled up into his shoulder<3

“You look pretty like this.”

Sodapop Curtis:

He’s such a teddy bear when you guys cuddle, you would be hugging him and resting your head on his chest and he would pet your hair down and give a small kiss every now and then!

“Your a sweet little thing, huh?”

A/n: SORRY!!! I seriously can’t think of any other hcs for the rest of the gang😭😭

[only-lonely-star]

hi! Can you do a Curtis sister imagine (she's older than pony but younger than soda) and the boys are sooo protective over her and scare away any boys who look at her so they think she's never even kissed a guy. Then she's at home alone and thinks the boys won't be home for a while and is making out with a guy in her room when Darry bursts in with the boys and they all lose their minds

୨୧ Not What It Looks Like ୨୧

~ Curtis Brothers (Curtis Sibling Reader)~

Warnings - Kissing, mild shouting and cursing, mild violence

Summary - You thought you had hours…

Author’s Note - Hii! I won’t be as busy this week so I’ll be sure to finish more requests as the week progresses, so sorry for the wait! Thank you so so much for the request, this one was fun to write, enjoy! 😽🫶🏼

Word Count - 2.4k.

⠂⠄⠄⠂⠁⠁⠂⠄⠄⠂⠁⠁⠂⠄⠄☆ ⠄⠄⠂⠁⠁⠂⠄⠄⠂⠁⠁⠂⠄⠄⠂

(Quick A/N || I decided to name the boy’s character ‘Thomas’ just because I find it easier than saying ‘the boy’ a hundred times or something 😭)

The Curtis residence was always a busy place. Whether friends were over, or it was just another chaotic night - there was never a dull moment. Tonight, however, you were declared as '(Wo)Man of the House' by your oldest brother, Darrel. Ponyboy and Sodapop didn't seem to mind lending you the title for the night, you did most of the housekeeping and whatnot anyway.

Ponyboy could be found slicking his hair back, standing in front of the bathroom mirror attempting to look tuff - or so he thought. Sodapop was occupied with Darrel, the pair pacing around the house as they rallied themselves up for the night. They were all going on a ‘guys night out’…whatever that meant. You were standing around, waiting to wave them off for the night.

Ponyboy emerged from the bathroom, a look of excitement in his eye as he approached the others.

“You ready?” Darrel asked, giving him a firm pat on the back, smiling down to him. Ponyboy nodded and hooked his fingers into the belt loops of his jeans, admiring Sodapop who stood beside him.

“Finally, took you ‘bout an hour to grease that hair up,” Sodapop chuckled, gently grazing his fingertips along the swoops of Ponyboy’s hair, combed back to utter perfection.

You let out a small sigh, a knowing grin creeping up on your face. You dismissed it as relief that your three rowdy brothers would give you some alone time. “So, are you guys…leaving…yet?”

Darrel raised an eyebrow, slowly stepping for the door as the other two followed. “Boy, someone sure is sick of us,” he snorted, the doorknob in the palm of his hand.

You sarcastically played along, shoving Sodapop and Ponyboy by the back of their shoulders with a scoff. “Sure am, get out.”

They exchanged small glances, Ponyboy holding up his hands in defense. “We’re goin’, we’re goin’…”

It didn’t take long for the two to file out, Darrel staying behind to have a word with you. He popped his hand on his hip, the other moving a stray strand of hair to rest behind your ear. His eyes met yours, a look of concern etched on his face. “Listen, you know I don’t like leaving you home alone,” he began, sensing your rebuttal a mile away.

“I’ll be fine, you ain’t gotta worry,” you assured him, your voice a rather gentle one. You knew that was the key to fooling him - it always was.

Darrel took your word for it, wrapping up his lecture before it even began. “No boys, no cookin’, no driving,” he spoke with finality, his index finger pointed to you as he reinforced the rules he set since the loss of your parents.

“I know!” you exclaimed, mildly frustrated with how protective he was acting. It would only be a few hours before he, Ponyboy, and Sodapop returned. It wasn’t like you were about to cause a disaster home alone - you’d done this countless times.

Darrel shook his head, wrapping an arm around the small of your back as yours wrapped around his chest. “Be back at eleven,” he murmured, pulling away and stepping outside the front door. You stepped outside as well, your feet kept on the steps as your brothers began to cruise on down the road. Waving them off with a smile, the boys reciprocated before disappearing into the horizon of the night sky.

You leaped for the side of the house, looking around frantically with a giggle of excitement. Your voice echoed, a mix of a whisper yet a beckon. “Thomas! Thomas, where are - …”

A hand grabbed your forearm, the boy hoisting himself up from within the small bushes along the side of your house. “I’m here.”

You leaped into his arms, picking away at small twigs and leaves that had fallen into his messy brown hair. Your legs wrapped around his waist the gentle feeling of your body against his, the boy’s hands holding you up from your hips. You chuckled, feeling the sweat practically dripping from his hair as you pecked his cheek. “How long have you been out here? I told you seven p.m!”

Thomas spun you around a few times before walking towards the front door that still stood wide open. “I left my place around six-forty, got here a minute ago,” he replied softly, carefully setting you down on the soft, beige sofa.

Your arms still yearned for him, even as he took a seat beside you, resting his arm over the top of the couch. He had only love in his eyes, admiring you from head to toe. “So, what’s the verdict?” he posed, grinning down at you, his free hand running through his hair.

“No boys,” you restated, remembering Darrel’s rules with a small sigh of annoyance. You’d gone this far anyway - so what did it matter? “But Darry said he’ll be back ‘round eleven with Soda and Ponyboy.”

Thomas’s grin only widened from there, settling himself into the couch further. “Oh so we got lots of time, hm?”

You tilted your head to the side, a small smile tugging at your lips. “Somethin’ like that,”

This felt a little too risky, sneaking a boy around in the living room of all places. They wouldn’t be home for a few more hours, but it still felt strange. Standing from the sofa, you tugged on Thomas’s wrist. “Let’s go to my room, I don’t feel safe here,” you joked, a small shake of your head as you glanced to the unlocked door. Thomas was more than happy to oblige, following you to your very empty yet feminine bedroom.

“So this is the little hide-out, huh?” he spoke teasingly as he glanced around, taking in the sight of clothes everywhere and a small vanity pushed to the corner of the room, across from your bed. He shut the door behind him, hesitating on whether to lock it or not. You sat down on the edge of the pink, ruffled bedding, clutching a pillow into your arms tightly.

“I guess it is,” you smiled softly, his charming gaze reeling you right in to where he wanted you. He stood in front of you, his hand moving to cup your jaw. You didn’t mind the touch of course, you were addicted to any touch from him.

Thomas removed his hand before sitting on the bed beside you, reaching out for the pillow. You reluctantly let go of it, knowing Thomas was about to make a bold move of some sort. You two were alone and absolutely infatuated with each other. He set the pillow aside, pressing his hand to your waist as he leaned his head closer to yours. “You’re beautiful,” he grinned, closing the distance between the two of you as his lips met yours.

Your eyes darted shut, one hand holding you propped up, the other resting atop his shoulder. This was no short peck, this was a deep and almost passionate kiss. You obviously reciprocated, the situation of being home alone too good to go to waste. You doubled his passion and added force to your kisses. Thinking fast, Thomas began to lean back as his head rested against the mattress. His hand found your waist, pulling your body flush against his. Thomas could feel your grin against his lips, his other hand moving to keep your jaw in his palm, ensuring your kisses didn’t stop any time soon. You pulled away panting, your smile never once faltering. “I think we should stop, I hear a car…” you began to say, a car door shutting nearby. The sound was eerily close - but then again your brothers weren’t scheduled to be home for a few hours.

Thomas gave a firm head shake, pulling your jaw closer. “Nope, it hasn’t even been an hour,” he reminded you, locking his lips onto yours once more.

You weren’t about to turn him down, so you did as told and continued, your head moving up and down with slight movements. Thomas’s tongue slipped in between your lips, the sensation was both new and a bit alarming. A small groan left your now parted lips, running your hand through his hair.

The sound of shuffling feet outside your bedroom door should’ve been a dead giveaway to stop - but your mind was cloudy and only focused on Thomas. It was far too late to stop now, even as the doorknob turned and you were aware someone was home, you didn’t have the time to stop.

“I forgot to bring my w-…” Darrel began, the door opening in a swift movement as he stood in the doorway absolutely baffled. His knuckles were now white as he squeezed onto the brown leather wallet in the palm of his hand. His instincts led him to toss the wallet with all of the force he could muster, landing directly on the boy you were laid atop of.

You pulled away in an instant, a small trail of shared saliva being wiped away using the back of your hand as the soft groans came to an immediate halt.

Your other brothers, Ponyboy and Sodapop, stood behind Darrel with displeased looks. “Come on, it doesn’t take this long to -…” Sodapop was quickly hushed as he too caught sight of scene.

Darrel stomped forward, his hands shaking with anger as he shouted at Thomas - the boy unbeknownst to their early arrival. “Get the hell out, the fuck are you doing with my little sister-?!” he shouted, his fists unraveling themselves to tug at Thomas’s shirt, stretching it out as he yanked him closer for answers.

You had never heard Darrel shout like that ever. You sprinted off the bed and stood in the opposite corner of the room as you watched Thomas nearly get a beating for the kiss.

Sodapop caught you off guard, his hand firmly grasping your bicep as his eyes bore into yours. “Who’s this boy?” he asked, his tone filled with utter disappointment - but at least it wasn’t anger like Darrel’s.

“It’s not what it looks like - Thomas and I just…” you began sheepishly, your eyes unable to make eye contact with him out of guilt.

Your eyes flickered over to Darrel briefly, watching him holler like you’d never seen before. Thomas nodded his head along vigorously, his eyes wide with fear as he desperately tried to free himself from Darrel’s grasp. Ponyby’s annoyed voice snapped you out of it, your attention directed towards him. “That boy from school? Really?”

Sodapop spoke up again, shoving your shoulder slightly as his expression held a stern look. “It don’t matter where he’s from, you know you ain’t allowed to have boys over.”

You glanced between Sodapop and Darrel, watching as he had to drag Thomas out of your bedroom, the yelling not yet ending. You swallowed the guilt down and nervously chewed the inside of your cheek. “I’m sorry~” you began, your hands fidgeting as you thought about the hour long lecture you’d receive from Darrel.

Sodapop began mumbling words of annoyance under his breath at the newfound information you’d had some secret boyfriend going on. None of your brothers ever would have expected such a thing from you - hell, the last thing they would suspect from you was to be caught kissing some boy while they were gone. “Can’t trust her… we just can’t…” he mumbled to Ponyboy who looked equally as pissed.

Moments later, Darrel had his jaw still clenched with Thomas now long gone. He made his way to you with his fists balled up and resting by his sides. “You’ve got explaining to do,” he grumbled, his voice thick with anger. You’d betrayed his trust, Sodapop’s, and even Ponyboy’s.

Exhaling deeply, you took a step back, your hand trembling in fear. “I just thought -…” your voice was interrupted by Darrel’s.

“It would be fun to sneak a boy around? Behind our backs? Especially after I said no boys?” His arms crossed as his stern gaze seemed to deepen further.

You didn’t reply, you stood there matching his stance only yours was out of shame. You knew you were going against their set rules.

Darrel shook his head as he let out a sigh he’d been holding in for way too long. “We just wanna protect you, that’s all. That’s all I want,” he said in a somehow gentle tone, wrapping an arm around your back, the other gesturing for a group hug.

Sodapop and Ponyboy circled around you, hugging you tightly. It felt as if the mood had lightened a bit now that Thomas was gone and you were back in the protective arms of your brothers. Sodapop nuzzled his forehead against the top of your head, chuckling softly. “So you’ve had some boyfriend all along?”

Darrel stiffened but held back from lashing out yet again. Ponyboy grimaced and swatted your back with a teasing snort. “Him of all people too?”

You broke the hug off, having to pry off their arms as you finally cracked a sheepish smile. “Not anymore - I think Darry traumatized that poor guy,” you giggled, the guilt subsiding to a feeling of amusement. Sure it was a messy way to break the ice with your brothers - but it was bound to happen eventually.

Darrel gave your back a firm pat, Ponyboy and Sodapop stepping for the door to your bedroom, snickering and cracking jokes. “I forgot my wallet, I came back and thought I’d check on you,” he explained, picking up the wallet he used on Thomas.

You winced at the memory of it hitting him upside the head, the shock initially hitting you as you scrambled off of him. “I was wondering why you came so early…” you remarked playfully.

“I know why you were tryin’ to kick us out so bad now,” Darrel shot back, an equal amount of sarcasm laced in his voice. He shoved the leather wallet back into his pocket.

He stepped for the door to your bedroom once more, glancing back at you. “No boys. Ever.”

Your eyebrows furrowed, stepping closer to him to argue on the topic. Darrel was already down the hallway as you chased him down. “You said when i’m eighteen - …”

Darrel cracked open the front door with a head shake. “Eighteen, but I better not catch you and *Thomas* again,” he huffed, hopping down the stairs, his feet on the white cement, “or any boy for that matter.”

You sighed and waved him off for a second time, this time with the intention of following the rules. You vowed you’d never risk something like that again. “Eighteen!”

[ravers8fantasy]

Punch out!! Characters if they did ghost hunting in some random scary abandoned manour ಠ_ಠ

its halloween szn!! They are in groups based on what circuit they are to cover more ground and chaos happens lawl I might make write a lil thing about this but who knows...

Sorry for any spelling mistakes!! I was rlly tired when I made this!!! also this is kinda alot of yapping so be warned....

minor circuit: third floor, 3 bedroom, 1 toilet, storage

von kaiser:

'Doesnt' believe in ghosts and says this idea is stupid (he is actually terrified of ghosts especially poltergeist's and wants to go home)

his flashlight ran out of battery at one point when he was by himself and he started running around and screaming for help

Because he kept saying ghosts didnt exist, he got into an argument with a very annoyed Disco kid

The team split because of it so it became Joe and disco on one side of the floor and hippo and kaiser on the other

He opened the door to a bedroom and heard a sound from somewhere underneath the bed. Bro screamed and fled for his life

Literally flinching at every single sound, he is starting to scare hippo because he literally looks like he is one scare away from a heart attack

Glass Joe:

Currently sitting in the 2nd bedroom on the floor after realising that the door's hinges had broken so he was stuck.

Brought a camera, ended up swapping it for the spirit box disco got from Piston who had gotten it from doc louis which, he found kinda odd

Got jumpscared by his own reflection in the bathroom next door, disco was laughing so hard at him

Then the shower turned on by itself with a loud hiss and they both ran out screaming thinking a ghost or demon was gonna idk tickle them or smth-

Disco was too scared to use the spirit box by himself in the dark in the 2nd bedroom so joe offered to do it

absolutely has no idea how to use a spirit box or what to say if it actually picks up a frequency

"bonjo- I mean, hello?...."

"............."

"uh.... Im joe.. I like bread do you?"

".........yes"

"oh! Well awh that's great mabye your not so scary-"

"....must run..joe."

".......o-oh merde why me"

Disco Kid:

"Joe take deep breaths okay- DEEP BREATHES JOE BREATH IN 1,2 AND OUT"

He helped plan this with Hondo and Sandman, Disco LOVES horror films, so he thought he was going to be a pro at this paranomal stuff

He kept yapping about how good he is at ghost hunting and basically just didnt stop talking

But when he realised Joe was stuck in the bedroom, he started freaking out and ran to find the others

Disco was excited to explore... Emphasise on WAS cus now bro is crying and screaming like zombie ghost Jason Voorhees is chasing him with an axe

Is using joe's camera as a flashlight but he keeps accidentally flashbanging himself in the face so now he is screaming in terror and pain bless

King hippo:

Bro is literally eating a packet of crisps whilst this is all going down he is unbothered af

Hippo doesnt get scared that easily so he was like the group's rock until the argument between disco and Kaiser

Got such a shock from the shower turning on thought that when he grabbed the sink it broke

hey its an old house of course its not going to be the most structurally intact😈 ...

Did NOT like the sight of the 1st bedroom, especially the doll which he swear's blinked at him

Hippo pointed out he could hear screaming from one end of the floor to kaiser, so they both quietly creeped their way and peeked around the corner....

It was just Disco, who told them what happened. Hippo managed to get the door unjammed by literally running into it so it flew off its hinges

They may of also released something else as well. Joe thinks he saw something pale dash into the darkness whilst they were walking away from the bedroom...

Major circuit: middle floor, living room, music room and master bedroom

Piston Hondo:

"OH SHIT THE PIANO WHERE'S MY SALT WHERE IS IT, DON WHERE DID YOU PUT IT."

Really wanted to go ghost hunting with the others despite his extreme paranoia and superstition

Has a note book, he writes down any thing paranormal which happen (he has also filled in a corner with doodles because he is getting more scared as the night goes on)

Since he is the fastest out of them, he often runs back and forth to check on the camera's in the corridor

Bro is running this place like its the military, he is making everyone (including Tigers clones) investigate

Thought he saw a ghost and yelped like he was being murdered... But it was just Don in the distance checking his toupee in a mirror

Bear hugger:

"do you think the ghost's dont like us invading their property?" - seconds before he fell deep asleep

Him and his emotional support squirel are NOT very happy to be here

Was keeping his cool, until he heard someone screaming and got a bit scared (very scared, he is very much scared)

Keep's jumping whenever the floorboards creak in the living room, he points out how the building isnt very structurally stable😈...

Following Piston around because unlike the other two, Piston seem's like he actually knows what he is doing (he doesnt, he is using his knowledge from TV)

Fell asleep in the piano room so he didnt notice the piano playing by itself lol

Great tiger:

"I think if the ghosts didnt want us here, they would of killed us already- THE PIANO IS PLAYING ITSELF YO"

He was so down to do some hunting, he even brought a sleeping bag because he thought they were gonna have a sleep over in the master bedroom

Started scrapping with a piece of loose wallpaper on the floor because he thought it was a ghost trying to get him

Used his clones to help, has one on the upper floor so he has a vauge idea of what happened with Joe

Also got jumpscared by his own clone whilst rounding a corner and it was just standing there (happened multiple times)

Heard the piano playing by itself and got so excited he was literally jumping up and down whilst the others freaked out

Don flamenco:

"OH MY GOD OH WE ARE GONNA DIE- THE PIANO ITS- NO ITS THE END- I WILL NEVER SEE MY CARMEN AGAIN"

Thinks a demon is lurking around every single corner on the floor

Bro is acting as if he is actually in a horror film, his ass is NOT helping look for any potential ghost's

Stopped by a mirror but swore he felt someone looking at him so he screamed like a fucking SOS SOS alarm and knocked the mirror over

Got so scared at one point he literally started crying, he doesnt even believe in ghost's as well

Eventually got the courage to go into the living room, but of course he had make it dramatic :

"hey Don, I dont think its a good idea to go in there, the floor was kinda weird pal.."

"no compañero, I MUST do this, I MUST get over my fear of the unknown"

"uh I think Bear is right Don come back to the corridor"

"listen Don, your are NOT the terminator"

"NO. I know im not... For I am THE Don flamenco, I do this for you my brothers, for the future... and for CARMEN MI-

Don then fell through the floor. And everyone started screaming. Womp womp dw he is fine it wasnt that much of a drop. None of them noticed a pale figure sneaking behind them though...

World circuit!!! : ground floor - parlour, kitchen, maid quarters and entrance

Aran Ryan:

Is more interested in what valuables the rooms are hiding than what ghosties are lurking because he knows he would fight a ghost if it appeared in front of him

Sandman asked if he brought anything useful and bro pulled out a ready to make molotov cocktail kit he had prepared

Hid inside a coat of armour and chased bull around until he fell over and got a nose bleed and some bruising

Says he got chased by something but, no one believes him because he also lied and said it wasnt him who chased bull around so-

Because of that he ended up getting told to "STAY TF IN THE PARLOUR ROOM" by Sandman, so now he is solitary confinement by himself and started to make the molotov cocktail

Was interupted when a very confused Don fell through the roof and landed on the sofa, followed by alot of screaming from the rest of the major circuit from above

Soda popinski:

Dude is unbothered af he just wants to drink juice fr

Well he was until he saw the pale ghost thing which chased Aran, now he just wants to leave

Got jumpscared by a stray tiger clone and split his juice, got mad and started trying to fight it

Laughed at bull getting chased by Aran in the armour, also laughed at macho when he screamed embarrassingly high after accidentally ringing the maids bell

Was NOT happy when he ran out of juice from stress drinking after hearing screaming from up stairs

Started running to check but because he is so tall he ran into the top of a door frame and fell back like slipping on a banana peel

Bald bull:

keeps telling everyone to shut up because everyone is just screaming now

Keep's knocking stuff over when investigating, thats pissing him off

Stressed af after Aran scared him with the armour stunt

I dont think his scream would be that bad it would kinda be like an "ARGGH"

He screamed like that when he saw the ghost at the end of the corridor and ran away screaming like he was actually going to die

Got into a massive argument with macho about the toilets, bull said he would wait for macho to finish but macho kept saying he is terrifyed and that something would get him

Super macho man:

Keeps posting about it on socials

"hey dudes!!! Totally wicked in here Aran wae 'grounded' by Sandy LOL"

"hey dudes!!! @.DonFlamenco just fell through the roof mega lolz!!"

"hey dudz !1 soda is unconscious. Not good not swag"

"ghosts are bogus ghosts arent real its all bogus right gang?????"

Doesnt believe in ghosts he kept saying its all a bunch of bogus

Was screaming bogus even whilst being chased by the pale ghost around the kitchen

Keeps screaming about everything. He literally saw bull walk out of a room and he started screaming

After he got chased by the ghost he genuinly thought he was going to get possesed by some demonic entity he was crying hysterical

At one point really needed to use the toilet and got into an argument with bull because he said he thought something was gonna grab his ass if he used the toilet so he wanted someone with him

Sandman:

Trying to keep himself together, but so much is going on around him he is now really jumpy and is ready to call it a night

Was trying to listen out for any strange sounds in the maid quarters, could only hear macho screaming

Also got chased by the ghost after he was seperated from the rest, was gonna fight it but realised how stupid that would be and look for him

Also ended up screaming at macho that no ghost was gonna grab his ass in the toilet and to just go in there by himself

So, so confused about everything, became even more confused after finding Don and Aran looking at the major league from the hole which Don fell through

Got everyone back outside somehow, by the end of the ghost hunt he was also pretty terrifyed by that old place

OKOK that was alot of yap holy moly but all done!!! Hope you enjoyed. (◍˃̶ᗜ˂̶◍)ﾉ”

*☼*―――――*☼*―――――*☼*―――――*☼*―

"so doc! Did I scare them?"

"well mac baby, I think you did more than just scare them..."

Ta da! Mac was the ghost all along😼 he wasnt allowed to go with them to investigate because of his age so Doc suggested he should play one massive prank on them instead (spirit box was actually a walkie talkie, mac had a costume, hid underneath beds etc) sorry if this was alot to read!! Sorryy!!!!

[brokentelevision]

Everyone say happy birthday to Souda rn

[serendipitous-girl]

𝐚𝐟𝐟𝐞𝐜𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧

⊱✿⊰ summary: headcanons with reader who is bad with handling affection

⊱✿⊰ warnings: none i can think of

⊱✿⊰ notes: yipeee yay i think this will be good but idrk. I haven't written for tmnt in a hot minute lmao so hopefully this will be good! This is short sorry 💀

ʟᴇᴏ

❀ he is an asshole and he loves to tease you because you are so strange about affection. I feel like Leo is not only a generally affectionate person but he also loves teasing his S/O.

❀ Leo loves to force you to ask for the affection (within your boundaries.. if you hated it and let him know he would stop.) It is sort of helpful in a way because it helps to get you to stop acting like you don't like it. He wants you to feel comfortable with hugs and kisses and everything.

ᴅᴏɴɴɪᴇ

❀ y'all jst aren't an affectionate couple. Like Donnie isn't very good with affection/PDA and he can't tell that you want the hugs and kisses because you act like you don't. So he doesn't initiate unless he gets jealous or possesive, he just assumes you don't want it.

❀ You would have to explain to him how you are feeling and you would have to verbally express what you want. Eventually he will be able to read your behavior but he can't do it right away, he needs your help.

ʀᴀᴘʜ

❀ Raph would be so scared that you don't like him anymore. He honestly thinks your behavior stems from his inability to be a good boyfriend versus your own troubles.

❀ He would kinda stop the pda for a while until you start seeming upset and it finally clicks to him. When he understands what's happening he would slowly integrate the affection into your life. So you could get used to it easier.

ᴍɪᴋᴇʏ

❀ He understands your behavior almost right away but he is a menace just like Leo. Instead of denying you affection, he ups his behavior ridiculously.

❀ The more you complain the more he gives you hugs and kisses and cuddles and everything. He will tease you about being embarrassed about it and he will eventually get you to start asking for it.

lori © 2024. please don't copy, modify, or do anything weird with my writing! i like reblogs and comments but please be kind as this was my writing.

[foryoupeko]

Imagine Peko waking up from the Neo World Program and reconnecting with Fuyuhiko.

Fuyuhiko catches Peko up with everything happening whilst the other survivors butts in every so often.

--

Sonia: Here's your coffee Fuyuhiko!

Peko: Oh, he needs cream and-

Sonia: I already added it! Just how he likes it!

Peko: (Frowns) That doesn't look like enough cream.

Fuyuhiko: I don't have as much as a sweet tooth anymore.

Sonia: Oh so you don't want the fried cookies I made for your coffee?

Fuyuhiko: You son of a bitch.

Sonia: Damn right!

--

Kazuichi: Fuyuhiko! I found some anime on the island! Let's watch it later!

Peko: Ah, he doesn't-

Fuyuhiko: It's fine. We'll watch it this weekend. Better not be romance.

Kazuichi: Yeah yeah, like you didn't get teary eye from the last one we saw.

Fuyuhiko: SOMETHING WAS IN MY EYE.

Kazuichi: ONLY DURING THE CLIMAX?

--

Akane: Fuyuhiko we're gonna run around the island tomorrow?

Peko: You run?

Akane: HE RUNS WELL!

Fuyuhiko: There's not much you can do on a debilitated island.

Akane: You're still not as fast as me.

Fuyuhiko: I'm not aiming to be a freak of nature.

--

Fuyuhiko: Peko are you okay? You're awfully quiet.

Peko: I knew you would be okay without me, I had no doubt. I just didn't expect you to mature so much. I haven't lived a single day without you but time never stopped for you. So it's jarring to say the least. I feel like I don't know you anymore.

Fuyuhiko: That gives us an interesting opportunity. Because we've been together ever since we were babies, we never had a proper introduction. So let's start over right now. (Extends his hand) My last name is Kuzuryu! My first name is pronounced, "Fu-yu-hi-ko". From this point forward, I hope we can get along so we can get to know each other better.

Peko: (stunned)

Fuyuhiko: Sorry, that was stupid.

Peko: (smiles) No. I loved getting to know you; I would love to do it all over again.

Fuyuhiko: But as equals!

Peko: (laughs) Yes. (grabs Fuyuhiko's hand) My name is Peko Pekoyama. It is nice to meet you.

[cupids-stimboards]

foptober stimboards - day 15 board based off: wanda fairywinkle

🌹 💌 🍨 / 🍫 x 🍫 / 🍨 💌 🌹

[fandomsoda]

Deromanticize holding hands, deromanticize kissing, deromanticize intimacy, deromanticize long-term relationships, deromanticize love.

Normalize platonic intimacy and queerplatonicism. Please.

[fionajames]

Christmas with the Greasers; Headcanons

Hey guys these are some headcanons about the Greasers for Christmas!

Enjoy, and please send requests!

MERRY CHRISTMAS!!!!!!!

Ponyboy

Loves Christmas.

Buys everyone books in hopes of getting them to like them more. Then has to read them because half of them can’t read to save a life.

He made everyone wait until all the others were there to open presents. 

The only one who can make a tea for Darry. 

He and Johnny team up to try and get Dally to enjoy Christmas. 

Pony goes to Church on Christmas Eve alone. Even though he no longer goes regularly, it reminds him of his parents.

Sodapop

Puts tinsel fucking everywhere.

Y’know how tinsel has like the fine little strips? Yeah, you’ll be finding bits of that in your food for weeks.

Buys everyone like lollies from the DX and writes badly spelt cards.

Puts decorations everywhere as well.

Managed to put a Santa hat on Dally’s head and doesn’t end up getting beat somehow.

But like, are you gonna punch a golden retriever? No. Not even Dally could do that.

Darry

Does this whole thing my parents do where he goes “I’m not getting up until someone makes me a cup of fucking tea.”

Enjoys watching 5 teenage boys rush to make a cup of tea while Dally just smokes a cigarette.

They have a tradition of all the gang celebrating at the Curtis house, as if they were all blood-family.

Gets everyone good presents.

Puts on Holiday Inn and White Christmas and shushes anyone who talks during during the films.

Johnny

He and Pony team up to get Dally to enjoy Christmas ofc.

Makes cookies and gives them in little packages to everyone.

Actually likes the Christmas movies Darry puts on.

Throws snowballs at socs with Dally but hides when they turn. 

Sleeps over at the Curtis house with the others ofc and doesn’t go home at all, too scared of his family.

Decorates a lot but we’ll, unlike Soda who’s just crazed.

Dally

Christmas Day is the only day Darry lets him smoke inside the house so he takes full advantage of that.

Really doesn’t see the point on Christmas.

Although, he does kind of grow to like it through the constant forceful nature of Johnny and Pony.

Gets everyone like, a pack of cigarettes or something like that. 

Threw snowballs and passer-bys.

Bought Buck a pack of cigarettes and Buck cried. One of the first hugs he didn’t immediately escape.

(I love the idea that Buck is just a sweet, lonely guy. Cause we don’t really know his personality, I headcanon him as a sweetheart).

Two-Bit

First up and is running wild in the house to wake everyone up.

Burnt himself but dropping boiling water on his like whilst trying to make Darry’s tea.

Complained about it for approximately 1.896 seconds before resuming running around whilst holding an ice pack to his leg.

Gets everyone a bottle of coke or something.

Screams happily when the Mickey Mouse Christmas specials come on.

No one is sad around Two-Bit but especially on Christmas cause he’s just an actual fucking child on Christmas.

Steve

Bought proper and good gifts but mostly so he could brag that he gave the best gifts.

Tried to suffocate Soda with tinsel when he almost ate a bit of green tinsel. 

Puts snow down Socs backs as they go past and uses Dally as a shield when they get angry.

Tries to watch the films but gets bored and makes snarky remarks throughout them.

[septembersart]

little space soda compilation while I try to get back in the groove

[stinkygirl009]

Johnny Cade headcon’s!

Johnny Cade X y/n

Warning’s: none, just fluff:) ‘did I miss anything?’

Johnny cade! Who was seated next to you in English class and almost got annoyed because of it.

Johnny! Thought at first you were going to be like every other snobby rich soc.

Johnny! Soon realized that you were actually nice and a well mannered girl. He started talking to you a bit more. When he told dally about you, Dallas internally groaned, with his experience with girls he thought you sounded like pretty girl who was trying to pull Johnny’s heartstrings. (That’s just because dally has bad taste in women tbh.)

Johnny! Who was hesitant on asking if you wanted to hangout with him and the gang to the drive-in. And of course said yes, because why not? He was a nice guy and you knew ponyboy in middle school and are still friends to this day but don’t talk as much, and your friends were going that same night so what’s the harm?

Johnny! Who was a complete nervous wreck when he saw you walking up to him and two-bit at the drive-in.

“Hi Johnny,” you smiled at him, “hi two-bit” you look over to two. “Hey girly” two-bit laughs and looks at Johnny. “Well you two have fun together” he says jokingly and pats Johnny’s shoulder and runs off into the snack bar. “Hi.” Johnny said awkwardly shifting his feet. “Um-” he looks around trying to find something to talk about.

Johnny! Who took to long to make conversation and you smiled. “Why are you nervous?” You giggled looking at his awkward stance. “I’m not nervous” he laughed a little bit.

Johnny Cade! After A few months later were both official and hung out almost everyday after school and got soda’s from the DX and walked around different neighborhoods.

Johnny! Finding out that you lost a few friends after a greaser found out that you both were together and told the whole school, that somehow made news to your parents…

Johnny! Who felt like it was his fault and reassuring him that it’s fine. “If they were my real friends the wouldn’t have left.” You say giving a quick peck on his cheek. he rolled his eyes annoyed with himself. ‘Shouldn’t he be the one reassuring you?’ You honestly didn’t care what anyone else thought or said about you two along with your parents.

You! Did get picked on for it though, but a few people shot them down as soon as someone said something, mostly because they knew you were a nice girl and got along with people.

Johnny Cade! Who surprisingly really good at skipping rocks on water.

Johnny Cade! Who likes when it rains.

Johnny cade! Who lets you yap your little head off to him and shove magazines in his face to show him something that caught your eye.

Johnny cade! Who lets you talk about anything to him. Either it having to due with school dress code or something that you heard. he’s always open to listen to you, he wants you to not hold back on your thoughts or opinions like he had to:(

Johnny! Who Had to face a lot of criticism for dating you, and that mostly being Dallas saying. But he didn’t care, as long as he was by your side he wouldn’t have a care in the world<3

[only-lonely-star]

Your recent fic of the Soda mishap is my new fav fic of the outsiders! It was so funny with just the right amount of angst!

Could I request a fic with a sister reader who is the youngest curtis and develops separation anxiety with Soda after the two of them were in a little fender bender? Neither were hurt but it brought up memories of their parents dying and she can't shake off the thought that Soda not being in her eyesight means he's gone too? She refuses to sleep in her own room goes with him to work (it's summer holidays so school isn't a factor) and anytime he showers she stands outsode the bathroom door asking if he's okay periodically. Just a big emotional breakdown if she happens to get separated from him? I hope that makes sense!

Thanks you!

☁︎ The Accident ☁︎

~ Sodapop Curtis ~

Warnings - Minor car accident, mentions of death, separation anxiety

Summary - You couldn’t imagine losing Sodapop.

Author’s Note - THIS REQUEST WAS MWAH!! CHEF’S KISS! 😽 I’m very proud of this one. It took me longer to write since I got a bit carried away, so I apologize for the long wait. I couldn't bring myself to make the ending sad, so I hope you all like how I closed the story. Thank you so much for requesting, enjoy it my loves !!

Word Count - 3.3k.

»——•——« »——•——« »——•——« »——•——«

You kicked back, finally able to rest after a long morning spent dipping in the lake with your older brother, Sodapop. It was summer break, so what better way to spend the day than being under the sun - swimming and shoving him around in the cool, crisp water? Your oldest brother, Darrel, still had work, even over the summer. Your third oldest brother, Ponyboy, decided he'd rather spend some time with his friends. Being the empath he is, Sodapop decided to drive you down to the lake to ensure you didn't feel left out. He loved spending quality time with you either way - he quite enjoyed your company.

Feet on the dashboard, you turned up the radio and sang along. You could practically feel the funky music thumping in your chest. The bass could be heard a mile away, causing Sodapop to let out a chuckle. "Havin' fun?" he asked, his eyes drifting to see you smile bigger than he ever had since the accident.

You nodded vigorously, a few stray droplets of water that remained on the ends of your hair flying onto Sodapop, dampening his skin. "Of course!" you beamed, removing your feet off the dashboard as you leaned back into your seat.

He gave a head nod of accomplishment at that. Sodapop was glad to have taken you out for a fun time for once. He would have to return to the DX again tomorrow morning, the cycle repeating all over again. "Glad we went swimmin', we could go next weekend or something too y'know..." he suggested, a grin on his lips not faltering once as he offered another trip down to the lake.

You gasped, already looking forward to it. "Really? Like - you'll actually take me again?" you asked, needing the last bit of reassurance before you could truly accept the offer.

He nodded once more, stopping at a red light to gently swat your shoulder with his knuckles. "'Course I'll take you again."

He earned another grin from you at that, proud of himself once more. Sodapop's eyes darted for the rearview mirror, noticing a red Pontiac Firebird riding up on the back of their car. "Well damn, you gonna slow down?" he asked aloud, a slight bit of annoyance in his voice. The car must have been going at least fifteen miles per hour right at the red light. You hadn't paid much attention to it until you noticed Sodapop's eyes go wide. The 'deer in headlights' gaze is the only right way you could describe it. Sodapop cursed under his breath once more, holding his hand out to press against your chest. The sound of screeching breaks against the road scared the both of you as you jerked forward. Sodapop's arm prevented you from moving around that much, but there was still an impact. You slowly opened your eyes, recovering from a wince you hadn't even realized was in effect.

"The fuck - ?!" he hollered, rolling down the window before slamming his hand onto the horn and holding it there to express his anger. Road rage was one thing, but this was totally different. Sodapop rarely acted out on his anger, let alone follow through with it and stick his hand out of the window just to flip him off.

You sat there, breath hitched in your throat as you momentarily dissociated whilst staring at the dashboard.

This was all too familiar for you. ‘The Accident’ is what still haunts the four of you to this day. Having both of your parents wind up in an auto wreck sure wasn’t on your bucket list at all.

It was the sound of the car nearly crashing that frightened you. The fact you could have obtained the same fate as your parents was such a big fear you’d been attempting to hide since the accident. What you dreaded the most was losing your brothers. Put in a life or death situation - you’d hand over your life in an instant if it would ensure your siblings would be safe.

It wasn’t until you realized you and Sodapop were pulled over with that same Pontiac behind you. Slowly returning to reality, the bearded man with salt and pepper-colored hair had his arms resting on the now rolled-down window. “She alright?” he asked, his eyes fixated on you. Your dazed expression had been permanently marked onto your face.

Sodapop scanned your face for any other emotion, but couldn't seem to detect any. He quickly turned back to the man, brushing him off. “She’s a little spooked, she’ll be alright.”

He gave a slight shrug and waved the both of you off. Sodapop immediately placed a hand on your shoulder and shook your upper half. “Gave me some cash to fix the damage…it ain’t too bad, the back is a little dented and some paint got scratched off - but that’s about it,” he explained in an attempt to snap you back to reality.

Your eyes scanned the road, still busy with vehicles buzzing around everywhere you look. Listening was easy, but trying to comprehend his words while your mind raced with panic was a difficult task.

“You sure look out of it,” he commented, moving the gearshift to head home. There was an underlying tone of concern you could easily hear in his voice.

Squirming around in your seat, you found a better position where you could see the road ahead, clear as day. Feeling paranoid was an understatement. “No, no, I’m fine,” you assured him, all the confidence you could muster coming into play. You couldn’t stand the thought of worrying him even further with your newfound state of shock.

The car turned at an intersection, a red Corvette coming at you from the left side. It was as if your body just knew what to do - curling up into a ball as your eyes closed shut. The car isn’t going to hit you. This is how normal cars drive. You weren’t hurt. Stop.

“Why are you all jumpy with me? You ain’t in any danger,” Sodapop piped up, noticing your flinch at the sight of the Corvette. “Calm down a bit, will ya?” he teased light-heartedly, unaware of the true conflict inside your mind.

“Sorry…” you mumbled in response, pushing down any remaining feelings of apprehension. “That car, Soda -…” the crack in your voice said it all, “Just scared me a bit, I guess I just don't want you to… to end up like Mom and Dad.”

The car became eerily silent, the only noise being the zooming of cars outside. The accident was a touchy subject for both of you - Darrel and Ponyboy as well. Just talking about it always darkened the mood.

“No. You’re safe, I ain’t ever gonna let anything like that happen to you,” he assured you, his voice thick with tension. He seemed to grasp onto the wheel tighter as he pulled over just outside your home. “You hear me? It ain’t happening.”

For once, he was stern. Sodapop was never stern nor agitated with you, he was always bubbly and grinning. You knew the mention of your deceased mother and father had triggered it. The accident may have been months ago, but the damage was nowhere near repaired.

“I hear you,” you mumbled shamefully, opening the car door and shutting it behind you swiftly. You stood with your hand rubbing onto your arm. The body language represented was one of dread and concern, but somehow relief. Relief that Sodapop was still standing before you - even if he was completing a mundane task.

Sodapop shut the car door as he hauled the bag of wet bathing suits through the gate and towards the front door. You followed, not once letting him out of your sight. You watched as he set the bag near the bathroom door. “Darry and Pony ain’t home yet, better shower before they come back,” he suggested, offering you first dibs with the shower.

You shook your head and stood underneath his arm, seeking some bit of comfort. “No, uh - I’ll do it later,” the words nervously fell from your tongue.

Sodapop ruffled his fingers through your hair, grinning like always. At least something felt normal. “Alright then, shower after me.”

With that, Sodapop waltzed inside the tiled room, unraveling an off-white and awfully tattered towel. Tossing it on the counter, he placed his hand on the doorknob and pushed it closed. You respected the privacy of course, but the pang of paranoia kicked in once more.

“Soda…?” you called out, the sound only a hoarse whisper. No reply.

It was strangely quiet on the other end of the door. No water could be heard running, no background noise of shifting clothes around, nothing. Your hand balled into a fist, the sound of three knocks beckoning him. “Soda, you okay?”

“Yeah…?” Sodapop responded with a confused tone, leaving the boy in deep confusion. “Are you?” he stifled a laugh at the question. He’d been gone a mere few seconds!

“I’m fine,” your voice quivered, exhaling deeply as you slid down the wall. You rested your arms around your knees and sat on the brown wooden flooring. You could practically feel the sadness washing over you. The corners of your lips seemed to subtly droop, your expression now a worried frown. A warm tear escaped from your left eye, leaving you to wonder why you were crying in the first place.

That car could’ve killed you. It could’ve killed Sodapop too - oh god, anyone but him. You couldn’t lose him. First your parents and now your brother - ?”

Wiping the stray tear away, you stood back to your feet and leaned your ear against the door, trying to make out any heavy breathing. The panic set in once more when the running water was the only sound coming from the other end of the door. “Soda, are you alright?”

The knob had been twisted, causing less water to flow from the shower head. “I’m okay - now what in the hell is up with you?” Sodapop demanded as his words echoed through your mind.

Sodapop beginning to feel a bit pestered by you didn’t seem to be an issue, you were at least grateful to have a response. “Nothing…sorry,” you spoke up, giving it a rest for the time being.

The eerie silence only led to the intrusive thoughts of Sodapop no longer being alive. This was torture at its finest. The shower seemed to drag on longer than you would’ve liked.

—————————————————————————

As the day came to a quiet evening, Sodapop had already climbed into bed for the night. Darrel could be found in the kitchen with Ponyboy baking a chocolate cake for tomorrow’s usual breakfast. Clutching your pillow and stuffed bear you’d had since childhood by your side, you crept inside his darkened room. He was lying on his front side, face buried in his pillow. A smile adorned your face once you saw him sleeping peacefully underneath the warm bedding. You tip-toed for Ponyboy’s spot in bed and lifted the corner of the sheets to slide in underneath them. Sodapop stirred and scooted further back toward his side of the bed. His eyes could make out your figure, halfway crawled into bed. “What’re you doin’?”

You were quick to reply, fully laying on your back now that he was awake. “I just wanted to sleep in here tonight…” you shrugged, the stuffed teddy a source of comfort against your chest.

Normally Sodapop would’ve urged it's best for you to not upset Ponyboy by taking his spot in bed. He felt tremendously guilty for earlier’s mention of the accident, it only made him want to ease your concern for his wellbeing. Sodapop could sense the constant fear nagging at you that if he wasn’t with you, he was gone as well. He wasn’t stupid - he was well aware. “Scoot over so there’s room for three,” he sighed softly before pulling your arm closer.

You could feel his lips curled into a loving grin against your hair. It was getting late, so it was a given that Ponyboy would walk in any moment now and settle down for the night. Your back against Sodapop’s chest provided a warm feeling inside. His arm was almost trapping you beside him from how tightly the embrace was. Feeling his heartbeat thumping against your back eased any nervousness that still lingered in your mind.

Sure enough, the hallway lights could be heard flicking off with a quick hit to the switch. A faint ‘goodnight’ was barely audible through the closed wooden door. Ponyboy twisted the knob and saw an unfamiliar shadow beside Sodapop in bed. He groaned once the realization swept over his head that it was you. “Alright, outta my bed,” he commanded with a rather sassy eye roll.

The sheets were flung off of your body as Ponyboy expectantly waited for you to leave. Sodapop squeezed you tighter against himself. “Pony, let her stay.”

Ponyboy scoffed and furrowed his brows in frustration. “Stay - ?! This is our bed, she has her own!”

Sodapop stifled a groan of his own, his hand extending to toss the bedding back over your body. “You’ve got room, either sleep with us or take her bed. It’s just for tonight...”

Ponyboy took one last glance at the two of you before plopping himself down in a huff. “You don’t even need to be here, it ain’t your bed,” he grumbled as he fiddled with the blanket that had been kicked to his side.

You felt guilty enough as is, but now the guilt had grown stronger. You exhaled softly and let your eyes drift shut. “I’m sorry,” is all you could manage to say in response before it turned to a whole meltdown on why you needed to stay close to Sodapop.

Ponyboy’s anger subsided to a calm and aloof demeanor. He was most likely too tired to even argue it anymore.

“I just can’t go back to my room…not when Soda’s all the way in here,” you explained, your voice kept at a quiet whisper. No response from either of them. That sickening feeling of loss had begun to eat you alive yet again now that you lay awake, speaking to your unresponsive brothers.

———————————————————————————

Morning came once again, except this time you weren’t woken up to the bird’s singing outside, or one of your brothers pouncing over your resting body. It was as if your mind already knew that Sodapop had left. Ponyboy too, it was nearly ten o’clock in the morning when the lonely feeling sank back in. You sighed and propped yourself up onto the pillows, using your forearms for support.

A muffled sound escaped your lips, immediately calling for Sodapop. Obviously, he couldn’t hear you behind a closed door. You sprung out of bed, the stuffed bear falling to the floor along with you. With a swift twist of the doorknob, you sprinted down the hallway to catch sight of Ponyboy in the kitchen.

“Soda - Soda - where’s Soda?” you asked frantically, no sign of your two eldest brothers being around.

Ponyboy bit into a mouthful of chocolate cake, not caring to finish chewing before speaking, “Leavin’ for work, why?”

You shook your head without another word and scrambled for the front door, pajamas and all. You saw Sodapop buckling in beside Darrel as he slipped on a shirt. You sprinted towards the car, shouting and pleading for them to wait.

“Soda, Darry!” you called out, your hand smacking the side of the car to stop the vehicle. Darrel looked beyond frustrated to see you causing such a scene. Sodapop was filled with great concern, even as the adrenaline rushing throughout your body masked your fear. He gave a head tilt to signal Darrel to let him handle this.

“I’m here,” he replied in an assertive tone, his empathic eyes feeling every emotion you’ve felt since yesterday’s accident. He understood you better than anyone. Reaching a hand out to pull you closer, his gentle grasp latched onto your wrist. He leaned closer to you and spoke lowly, “You alright, kid? You’re scarin’ us, y’know.”

You nodded. In all honesty, you were okay now that you’d seen Sodapop. It felt like every second spent away from him was hell on earth. He could be hurt, laying out in the street somewhere - dead.

“I’m coming with you,” you insisted, tugging on the backseat door behind Sodapop. It didn’t open. Instead, Darrel’s husky voice backed you away from the handle.

“Coming with us -? No kids allowed, be realistic for once.” Darrel gave you a stern warning that if you didn’t head back indoors then you would never hear the end of it.

Sodapop exhaled sharply and glanced between you both, trying to handle the situation. He locked eyes on you, giving you the same empathic look as before. “Just…” he gave Darrel a wince before facing you again, “You got five minutes to get ready and then we're leaving.”

Your smile reappeared yet again, immediately racing back up the stairs leading to the front door. The sound of your brothers’ voices grew louder even as the distance between you and the car grew. A glimpse of the two arguing caused a bitter pang in your heart. Pushing the feeling away, you darted for the bathroom.

———————————————————————————

“She can stay with me. The DX ain’t in a bad area, she’ll be fine…” Sodapop spoke softly to Darrel, trying to reason as to why you should come along to work with them.

You settled yourself in the vehicle as it began to propel forward. The tension of the previous argument still lingered, but at least Darrel kept quiet as soon as you were in a close enough radius to hear the bickering. He wouldn’t be caught dead speaking of you like that while you were listening.

———————————————————————————

Taking Sodapop’s hand, he led you inside of the gas station in which he worked. You’d been here countless times before, bumming around with your brother’s friends as they smoked and attempted to sweet-talk any girl that passed. Sodapop and Steve never did, they would be fired after receiving complaints for doing such activities. Sodapop would always bend the rules, slipping a few snacks and whatnot into his pocket before leaving work. The DX brought back fond memories even as you stepped inside the front door, a small bell ringing overhead, indicating your entry.

“Now, I ain’t supposed to have company,” Sodapop spoke quietly, holding onto your shoulder and bending down a bit to be eye level with you, “But I couldn’t say no, I just couldn’t.”

Your eyes stung from the tears that dared to form during such a heartfelt moment. Sodapop was aware?

“Soda, I can’t lose you too,” your voice quivered as you quickly closed the distance between one another. Your arms wrapped around his neck, Sodapop immediately reciprocated the hug.

“I know, I know…” he replied as he softly stroked the back of your head, his fingers intertwining with your hair in a soothing motion. “You ain’t losin’ me anytime soon, I can promise you that.”

You willingly let the tears fall from your cheeks, landing on Sodapop’s shoulder which dampened the fabric quite a lot. He didn’t mind at all, in fact - he was glad you were no longer bottling yourself up. You squeezed him tighter, wishing the hug could ensure you’d never lose him. “I love you,” you spat out in a desperate cry.

Sodapop nodded along, the soothing motion of his hand still in effect. “I love you too y’know, a lot,” he said with a delicate tone, one he only used with you. You were his little sister and he would never let anything separate the two of you.

You just don’t stop living because you lose somebody.

It was as if the hug was the one thing you needed - the one thing that could ease your pain. Learning to cope with the death of your parents was by far the most difficult task you’d faced. Memories of the accident only strengthened your love for your brothers, clinging onto them as if you’d lose them next. Living in constant fear, dreading any separation was no healthy way to cope. The only way to cure the feeling of this overwhelming pain was to cherish your brothers like never before. And that’s exactly what you did.

[milkman-zahhak]

Shane's overindulgence at the desert festival

(WARNING. KINK CONTENT AHEAD. READ TAGS FOR SPECIFICS. PLEASE JUST IGNORE IF THIS ISNT YOUR THING)

A quick, messy drawing. It took me all day (lightning fast speeds compared to my usual..) but whatever, it's for me and I like it enough. I decided not to stress myself out about the parts I couldn't draw, like the one hand or the feet. Lol.

I also wrote a short shitty fanfic to go along with it. Maybe help the immersion. Idk. Fanfic below the cut. Sorry for the abrupt ending, I don't wanna make it too long.

☆°☆°☆°☆°☆°☆°☆°☆°☆°☆°☆°☆°☆°☆°☆

As the warm wind blew across the desert horizon, Shane stood proudly amidst the bustling crowd of his fellow villagers at the Desert Festival. His eyes sparkled with delight and determination as he made a beeline for the concessions stands. He turned to the farmer, his husband, and let him know about his plan before his lover inevitably wandered off to go explore those freaky skull caves until midnight, as usual. "Heh, remind me to brush my teeth tonight..." Shane chuckled to himself, "...there's 12 unique soda flavors, and I'm on track to try them all." He bought his drinks and sat at the table right next to the food stand. He took a deep breath and raised the first bottlr to his lips, savoring the sweet, fizzy sensation as the liquid danced across his tongue. It tasted pretty damn good. Truthfully, Shane didn't really have that great of a concept for the amount of food/drink intake that can be considered a "sample", after all, he's not some pompous fancy jerk who samples things on the regular. And soda isn't nearly as bad as alcohol, so if anything, indulging in stuff like this was beneficial to his recovery! (<- what he tells himself) With enthusiasm radiating from his every pore, Shane approached the colorful soda stack in front of him on the table with excitement, each bottle promising a new taste adventure. He eyed the rainbow array of liquids, the anticipation making his mouth water. One by one, he carefully selected each flavor, evaluating the flavors, making sure he gave every drink an equal and fair judgement by making sure to taste the whole thing.

As the day wore on, Shane's sips became slower, more deliberate, as he spent his day at the desert festival in a quiet corner chugging soda instead of participating in the main activities. The small crowd around the food vendors seemed to fade away as the hours passed, everyone either competing in the various challenges and games, or heading home. The annoying chatter of people was replaced by a symphony of fizzes and gulps as he swallowed. About halfway through the soda selection, Shane was starting to feel the effects stack up. Each flavor was unique and tantalizing, from the tangy zest of lemon to the exotic allure of starfruit– some flavors were of foods, which he didnt even know how they managed to make into sodas, but they tasted interesting enough that he didn't really care to dwell on it. The first signs of discomfort (or discomfort that interupted his activities, at least) appeared after the seventh sample, a faint rumbling in his stomach accompanied by a bloated feeling. Shane chuckled nervously, rubbing his distended belly as he continued on his quest. The laughter petered out into silence as he realized just how full he was getting. Years of near-deadly alcoholism had cursed him with a bit of a beer gut, but nothing unusual by any means. Shane's physique was far from his highschool gridball days, his flesh now squishy to the touch, but he was healthy enough, he thought. What is unusual right now is that his usually soft belly is starting to feel kinda.. firm. And more-than-kinda loud.

By the ninth flavor, his once doughy abdomen had inflated like a balloon, straining against his shirt. Bubbles of gas formed from all the carbonation, and started to escape from the confines of his stomach, causing him to emit small, embarrassed burps. Despite the discomfort, Shane remained resolute, determined to taste all twelve flavors. His hand moved mechanically to cover his mouth when he felt the signs of an oncoming burp, muffling the sounds as best he could. The few people around him cast curious glances, but he paid them no mind, his focus entirely on the task at hand. He could already feel the pressure building, the gas fighting for release. "*urp... uurp.. * Oh boy..." he mumbled, eying the last few samples with a mixture of excitement and trepidation.

Reassuring himself that this is childs-play, it's fucking soda for crying out loud, he's gotta drink something. And this is like the tamest kind of drink besides plain water, right? Shane reached for the tenth flavor - a bright blue concoction that promised a taste of ancient fruit. He took a deep breath, mentally preparing himself for the onslaught of fizziness. As the cool liquid hit his tongue, his stomach rebelled, sending ripples of gas upwards. "*uuurgh*" Shane groaned, his hand flying to his mouth to suppress a much larger belch. *urp.. bhu-uORP* "oof, nnf.." he grunted, before being interupted by a deep, wet, belch.

*bluuuu-UUuurppp* Eyes watering, he forced himself to swallow, the pressure inside him growing exponentially. His cheeks puffed out as he held in a second belch, and he could feel the soda sloshing around in his overfilled stomach. His fellow townsfolk werent anywhere nearby, thankfully. The few people left seemed to all be across the street on the other side, chatting idly amongst themselves. Either due to the late hour or perhaps the sketchyness of street food. He didn't care; he was so close to achieving his goal.

The final two flavors were a blur of sweetness and bubbles. He barely even noticed the flavor anymore. As he brought the bottle to his lips one last time, Shane's stomach lurched violently. He swallowed hard, the sensation of his belly straining against his shorts waa almost unbearable. "*burp* There... *huff* ...we...go..." He managed to choke out between sips, each swallow more difficult than the last. Finally, with a triumphant cry, he downed the final drops and tossed the empty bottle aside and away from his hands, as they instead flew to his stomach, massaging the taut surface as it churned and gurgled. "*uuorlp* Ugh..." He groaned, feeling the full weight of his accomplishment settling heavily in his gut. His stomach was a swollen, gassy mess, but the thrill of victory surged through him, pushing aside the discomfort - at least for a moment. Then, as the reality of his situation set in, Shane couldn't help but wijce with every deep breath. "*hurp* Well, I did it... I sampled every flavor... ugh... All 12! But my poor stomach..." Another burp escaped him, preceeded by a sickly churning in his stomach. He winced at every deep breath he took, rubbing his distended belly tenderly. He couldn't even help it as air was forced up his throat with nowhere else to go inside of his straining stomach. Shane swallowed reflexively after this burp, as if he was afraid of how it would end. It tasted like a sour amalgamation of all the sodas he's drank that day. He grimaced and clutched a handful of fabric from the less-tight parts of his shirt before loosening his grip and resuming the gentle rubbing of his taut belly. "M-my poor stomach... isn't letting me forget the taste of any of them... "*hic-ouurlp* ugh... bleck"

Every shift in movement would cause an audible slosh, The (literal) weight of his soda taste testing was hitting him full force. Anxiety crept into his mind as he realized he has to go home at some point. He has to stand up, get out of this chair, and get on the bus back to stardew valley, and somehow waddle back to the farm. It was getting late. Almost 9pm, and here he is, focusing on his breathing so that he doesn't spew a rainbow waterfall. He takes off his jacket, one he regrets wearing to the desert, leans back and groans. This is going to be a long, long night.

[loosesodamarble]

About the recent chapter drop...

So chapters 374, 375, and 376 of the Black Clover manga dropped as of the day I've started drafting this post. I have many feelings about this chapter, as several friends can attest. I was going a little a lot feral in a group chat.

Wanna quickly tag @thoughtfullyrainynightmare, @lyranova, and @kalolasfantasyworld for encouraging me to write this little essay. I'll also tag @drmarune as a fellow Faust fan (I know you also love the Yami family so hopefully my thoughts on them are satisfactory).

So let me begin with saying that I'm mainly a Faust girlie. But I will be covering both the Yami and the Fausts to the best of my abilities because the family stories are connected. I cannot give thorough commentary on the chapters if I ignore what's going on with Yami and Ichika.

Okay so! Where to start with my analysis?

I guess the most obvious place to start is with Chapter 374. Title: Demon-God. The "Demon-God" in question is supposed to be Yami. Yami's Dark Magic is seen as ominous and being the attribute of a supreme devil enhances its demonic connotation. Grey, while healing Yami's wounds in chapter 323, noted that Yami's body had become devil-like. Yami is infamously known as the "God of Destruction" in Clover Kingdom. And finally, in chapter 342, Ichika and Yami's father stated that the Yami clan reserves a title for the strongest member of them. The title: Demon-God. (In other words, this chapter could've been titled "Yami Sukehiro" and it wouldn't have changed anything./lh

Looking between when Yami takes the demon soul pill and the fuzzy glimpses of when Ichika took the pill, I'm wondering if the main reason Yami was able to stay sane while under the drug's effects has to do with his current condition. What I mean is... Ichika was just... kinda there. There's not much detail but there didn't seem to be much going on and Ichika and Yami's father just gave Ichika the drug on a whim. There was no outlet for the surge in Ichika's physical prowess. Meanwhile, Yami takes the drug while severely injured but also in the mindset that he has to get up and help fight off Lucius's army. His physical abilities are getting kicked into high gear and he has something to target with those powers. Maybe my reading is weird or wrong. But could it be that the reason no member of the Yami clan was able to stay in control when they took the drug is because they weren't taking it in the right condition. Like, being on death's door probably isn't a prerequisite but maybe no one took the drug with firm grasp on what to do with the excess power. I dunno.

Rewinding a bit... That reunion! FUCKING IMPECCABLE! I love the way Yami at first sees Ichika as a little kid. The way he remembered her last he saw took precedence over reality for a moment (AND HE'S NOT THE ONLY VICTIM OF IT!). I love Ichika's apology; the way she details the truths she learned recently (probably not just from her memories being triggered but I'd assume she had Ryuu clarify everything to her so she could really be thankful to Yami for making sure she'd be alright) then topping it off with the "I'm sorry." As a little sister who has misinterpreted things done by my older siblings, I really felt for Ichika. I can tell that Ichika is in pain, realizing how she wronged Yami by viewing him as a destroyer, but there's also so clearly a relief in knowing that the whole time, he had her best interests at heart. (Okay, my sisters never murdered our whole family clan, but you get the idea.) And Yami doesn't linger on it. He accepts her apology and even points out how he had help making sure Ichika was okay.

The flashback of Yami and Ryuuya parting ways... Ryuu always believed in Yami. Also, I love the panel of Yami with the torii gate and the rising sun behind him. The juxtaposition of the torii gate and rising sun - very Japanese and thus Hino symbols - with Yami being just about to leave Hino is like... Symbols of his homeland seeing him off essentially. MAN! I FELT SOMETHING THERE! Anyways, I know that Yami and Ryuu are looking forward to meeting up again now that they know it's possible.

Now back to when Yami has taken the demon soul pill. Yami is taking on his final form as the Demon-God of Destruction. I love the way Yami's form looks.

The splatter of blood from his wounds is replaced by Dark Magic spreading over his body. The facial markings draw one's attention to Yami's eyes and it makes me think of how on oni masks in noh theater(? I think I have that right), the upper brow and the cheeks are scrunched closer to the eye area to frame the eyes. I'm talking out of my ass here, sorry. His thoughts in the moment too are so juicy! Before, his protection of Ichika meant abandoning her. No more of that though; they're together again and Yami will keep it that way.

I love how his panel shows that Yami has incarnated into a true God of Destruction. But he's not destroying aimlessly. He's in control and he's directing his path of chaos towards Lucius's madness and will tear it apart to save everyone.

Yami and Ichika don't get to have a long heart-to-heart due to the present circumstances but Tabata gave them just long enough to breathe and reconcile. To me, it also keeps in line with the way the Yami family works. Yami Sukehiro is quick to act and react. He bears some heavy burdens in his life but he is not a man who wallows in pity or sorrow. His response to adversity is to take it in stride as best he can and make his way towards the future. He accepts Ichika's apology and the pill to awaken what has always been a part of him: the will to protect. Ichika is shaken from seeing her brother so helpless and pouring her heart out in what little time she had. And Yami did shield her at the end of chapter 374, but in the next chapters, she's locked into a fighting mindset. She says herself that she won't stand by any more; she intends to shoulder the responsibility of this battle and fight alongside her brother as an equal. The Yamis are resilient people who can take so much, and the burdens are made easier now that they can carry them together.

Speaking of together, the combo spell that Yami and Ichika have is called "Black Heavens." It's got layers! The Yami clan are connected to demons and devils through their Dark Magic and thus stand opposite of the heavens thematically speaking. The combo spell also builds off of Ichika's Black Star spell and Yami's Black Hole spell. The way the Dark Magic is the antithesis of a religious heaven, darkness is what makes up most of the spatial heavens is awesome. Also the fact that black holes form when stars die and collapse... Yami is the older (and thus closer to dying) sibling... I just needed to put those thoughts out there while still firmly on the topic of the Yami siblings.

Now onto the next chapters...

Chapters 375 and 376 have to be talked together because just like Nacht and Morgen as twins, and just like the Faust-Yami dramas, the two are connected! 375 is titled Strafe and 376 is Sühne. The English releases of the chapters clarify that the words mean "punishment" and "atonement" respectively (if there is any specific connotations to those words, they're lost on me and I would happily accept any clarifications). (Also note that the words are German; Faust and Germany just go hand-in-hand). I've already made a post about Nacht and how his character centers on the themes of punishment and atonement. To quickly summarize, Nacht's character is about continually punishing himself as his atonement for killing Morgen. (I do also point out how he avoids forgiveness as a way to resolve his guilt, but there isn't a chapter titled "Forgiveness" here, now is there?) So these chapters seem to be Tabata's finale for Nacht (and Morgen). (I do hope that a page of the next chapter does see Nacht and Morgen sharing some final words, because if Acier got to give her kids some kind of goodbye, then Morgen should get a chance to say something to Nacht as well. Please Tabata.)

Moving on from just the chapter titles! What actually happens in the two chapters?

Chapter 375 starts with Nacht getting a good look at Morgen and, like the fandom did chapters ago, clocking the devil that Morgen is in possession of: Lucifugus. The wretched memory of the day Nacht tried to summon Lucifugus is burned into his memory; of course he'd recognize the bastard.

Regarding Nacht's thought that Lucifugus is controlling Morgen's body... We know from Sister Lily's words/behaviors (a bit of Acier too at the very end for her) that the human beings who have been turned into Paladins are still conscious/aware/present as themselves. It's just that Lucius's brainwashing is forcing them to believe a certain way, spout that nonsense about "saving the world," and take the actions they are taking. Put simply: a fragment of their true selves exists within the false persona of the Paladin that Lucius forced on them. However, I'm certain that Nacht knows it is in fact Morgen in control but he's trying to tell himself otherwise.

I mean, looking back at chapter 374, Nacht's immediate reaction to seeing Paladin Morgen is to mentally call him Morgen! It's then here in chapter 375 where Nacht is saying that Morgen isn't in control.

Nacht is distressed. He's face-to-face with Morgen, whom he killed, and using the very same power that Nacht had tried to gain and caused Morgen's demise. It's double the shame and guilt on Nacht's conscious. And so he tells himself that it's Lucifugus, not really Morgen, in control. It's an act of desperation. Nacht is trying to convince himself that it's not Morgen's he's facing as a way to relieve himself of some of the stress/anguish that would come from this battle and defeating his opponent. Because if it's not really Morgen, then Nacht wouldn't have to feel any more guilt/grief about it, would he?

I think it's entirely in-character of Nacht. He's attempting to distance himself from the reality before him, similar to how he distanced his past failings from his own person by projecting his criticisms onto the Black Bulls. It never erased his feelings of self-loathing, but it was what Nacht did so he wouldn't just sit and wallow in misery. He pushed his self-hatred onto others and became the cold, critical vice captain of the Black Bulls to fulfill his mission of spying on Spade Kingdom. And now, instead of projection, he's straight up denying things. In this battle against Paladin Morgen, Nacht is trying to ignore the painful reality in order to spare his feelings and see the fight through.

But Nacht couldn't deny the truth for long.

Lucifugus wouldn't be saying these things to him. Who knows what Lucifugus would say to Nacht, if anything at all. Either way, it's Morgen speaking to Nacht. And it shakes Nacht to his core. Not the mention that what Morgen says would also drive the knife deeper into Nacht's heart. The brothers may not have been close while Morgen was alive, but Morgen still understands Nacht enough to call out his feelings of despair.

The way I'm reading it, Nacht falters in battle because he can no longer lie to himself. He's fighting Morgen. A twisted up version of his beloved younger brother, but it's Morgen nonetheless. In submitting to that reality, his feelings (guilt, sorrow, remorse) overwhelm Nacht and it gives Morgen the chance to gain the upper hand in their fight.

And like with Yami seeing Ichika as her younger self for a moment, Nacht's view of Morgen is from ten years back (you can tell by the fluffy robe having having grey shading while Morgen's Paladin robe is pure white and the details on the collar area). At least for one page, we know that Nacht sees Morgen not as the enemy Paladin, but as the kind and noble Magic Knight he used to be. (The present and Nacht's memories of Morgen overlapping and distracting him earlier on too is something I personally believe in just to make it all the more painful. But that's more headcanon and not analysis.)

Nacht laments how he thought he'd already cried all his tears before. But that can't be the case. Nacht's love for Morgen is an active and present feeling for Nacht. So long as Nacht loves Morgen is something alive in his heart, he will find himself crying over and over again for the loss of Morgen's life. That's the way it seems to be turning out for Nacht. Unless he completely closed his heart off to his affection for Morgen, his tears will never truly dry up. It's small, quick line in the chapter but it speaks so deeply to Nacht's feelings. In contrast to Yami who can take things in stride and move on, Nacht is someone who holds onto his suffering and lets it haunt him to the depths of his soul. Nacht and his thoughts focus on things that are gone and cannot be changed. While he does live in the present and makes things better for the future, Nacht has trapped himself with thoughts of a past that can't be undone. It's part of the tragedy that is Nacht's character.

(Real quick, we're going to put a pin in Morgen saying "Brother, let's start over again. Together!" Right before he attempts to blast the ever loving crap out of Nacht. Mixed messages much?)

I wanna bring back the title of chapter 375: Strafe (Punishment). Back in chapters 285 and 287 (coincidentally before and after Nacht's backstory in chapter 286), Nacht thinks to himself "I don't care if I die." Nacht nearly sacrificed himself three times during the battle. Devaluing his life over and over was Nacht's way of punishing himself for his past. And now Nacht is repeating that behavior as he tells himself that he'll defeat the Lucius clone and Morgen even if it kills him. Nacht showed himself some mercy when he stated his intent to live with the Bulls properly. However, he didnt actually stop seeing himself as an expendable sacrifice; in his eyes, his death is worth more than any life he could life. Which hurts to see as a Nacht fan! This time, though, Nacht isn't endangering himself as punishment but he still receives it. Morgen, the very person Nacht wronged so many years ago, is the one delivering the punishment. Physically and emotionally, Nacht's being destroyed. And, in my eyes, it could be that Nacht is okay with it. He didn't stop hating himself, he just stopped acting on that self-destructive feeling. He's accepting Morgen's attacks because Nacht's pain in the present can't be as bad as the pain Morgen felt as he died.

Thankfully, Yami comes in for the save. And when he gives Nacht another talking to, Yami says this:

Yami knows that Nacht didn't let go of the past. That he's been quietly keeping the pain in his heart. The way Yami validates the idea that Morgen's death is a sin on Nacht's part is fascinating. Looking at the big picture, it was more an unfortunate accident; Nacht did incite it by summoning Lucifugus but Morgen chose to destroy the relic with his own hands. Neither Nacht nor Morgen are to blame, they just took actions in line with who they are and it resulted in Morgen's sacrifice. Whether or not Yami wholeheartedly agrees with Nacht's view is a discussion for another time but here, in the moment, Yami leans into it. Yami speaks to Nacht based on those beliefs. From there, he drill it into Nacht's head that if he's going to hold onto what happened as his sin, then he has to use it as a way to push himself into the right course of action rather than let it stop him dead in his tracks. In chapter 376, Ichika also chimes in to get Nacht on his feet again. Her remark isn't only directed at herself; it resonates with Nacht too. Neither of them can leave Yami to deal with Morgen on his own. They don't have the luxury to stand idle and both of them are people that are above being victims of their pasts. Yami was there to protect them so they have to do the same.

Yami and Ichika's words together deliver a powerful message. “If you are going to carry a sin on your conscious, do something with it.” For Nacht (and anyone really), it's a mistake to acknowledge his faults and leave it at that. It doesn't do any good. To give meaning to his sin and the feelings that come with it, Nacht has to act upon them. He has to do what needs to be done to make up for the sin. That means killing Morgen again, not as a tragic accident but as an act of care and the means to free his spirit. It doesn't erase a thing but it makes things as right as they can be.

Quick break from Nacht and his feelings regarding Morgen to have a talk about Yami and his Morgen related feelings!

Yami has a moment to share words with Morgen. He makes it clear that his ire is directed at Lucius. In Yami's mind, there's no real blame on Morgen for his actions as a Paladin. He understands that Morgen wouldn't want so much death and destruction in the name of a new world. It's all Lucius's manipulations. And this view of Morgen again shows the contrast between Yami and Nacht. Nacht is stuck in the past and is seeing Morgen as his dear brother who he couldn't do anything for. Meanwhile, Yami's thoughts are in the present and he's seeing Morgen not as his friend but as an unfortunate puppet being controlled. Yami does acknowledge Morgen as the enemy but he's drawing a fine line between Paladin Morgen and the Morgen he knew.

Also, Yami's desire to see the memory of Morgen be untainted by his deeds as a Paladin is an interesting contrast to his usual feelings towards being looked down on. He's shrugs off most insults towards him (though he can admit when his feelings do get hurt) and is fine with the Black Bulls being considered the worst squad. But Morgen is different. Yami doesn't want to see Morgen become someone tainted by acts of cruelty, even if they aren't entirely his own choice. It says so much about Yami for him to want to preserve the integrity of Morgen's memory. He treasures his friendship with Morgen so deeply because Morgen was one of the first people to accept Yami and believe he could be a squad captain. Yami won't let anyone have any reason to think unfavorably of Morgen. He who saw the good in all should be seen as good by all. That is Yami's belief. I love it so much.

Back to focusing on Nacht!

We return to Nacht at the start of chapter 376: Sühne (Atonement). This chapter really is all about Nacht's final act of atonement for the sin he'd been punishing himself over for years.

Now before he re-enters the battle, Nacht has a moment of contemplation. The dream he describes is brief but it carries so much meaning. Nacht looks back and wishes he'd joined the Grey Deers as Morgen had always suggested he do. He really had always desired a closeness with Morgen but his fear of doing harm to his brother instead outweighed his love. His regret over not taking Morgen's hand sooner is evident and it again drives home the idea that Nacht's thoughts always return to the past to haunt him. And the line about Nacht and Yami fighting over Morgen's attention shatters my heart further because-!

Morgen probably would've chosen Nacht over Yami if he had the option. As much as Morgen and Yami made a good team, Morgen wanted to share that understanding and synergy with Nacht.

(Also, we are creating another pin for this moment.)

Both of the Fausts were jealous of the bond that Yami had their brother! Morgen and Nacht are more alike than either of the realize and it's yet another tragedy in their lives that they will never know that about each other! I JUST! AAAAAAAAUUUUUUUUUUUGH! I can't be calm about this, guys! Morgen and Nacht keep reaching into my soul and drawing out more of my love and tears with how their dynamic continues to grow more heartbreaking!

(Deep breaths, Soda! Take deep, slow breaths now...)

Nacht thinks about how Morgen would've smiled at his and Yami's antics. Morgen is always smiling in Nacht's memories (except when he infiltrated the Fausts' devil ritual basement and tried to dissuade Nacht from summoning Lucifugus, but that was a special circumstance). Morgen's smile being so ever-present in Nacht (and Yami's) recollections of him goes to show that he was a beacon of positivity to both of them. Morgen was light, warmth, happiness.

But Nacht always wakes from that dream and he cries each time, mourning the loss of something that never was but could've been. But he refused to have any of that, having pushed Morgen away each time he asked Nacht to join him. Instead Nacht chose the path of devils and Forbidden Magic. He widened the chasm between himself and Morgen. His actions have led him to a world where he caused his brother's death and now will have to see him die again. In short, the first page of chapter 376 is about the ache caused by what Nacht wants in his dreams and what he has to face in reality.

We cut to Yami fighting Morgen for a bit which includes Morgen refuting Yami's statement that Lucius is a bastard. And we also see Morgen saying

(Adding another pin for that. We'll come back, promise. It's just that I want to divulge the very depths of my Morgen thoughts closer to the end [closer to Morgen's end really].)

I've already discussed how Ichika's words with Nacht help him with his mental/emotional breakthrough so I'll skip over that portion of chapter 376.

As I said at the start, the Faust and Yami family stories are connected. They parallel each other. The families are connected to demons or devils (demon soul pills for Yamis and devil binding ritual for Fausts). The elder sibling was seen as an ideal heir (Yami's strength was lauded by his father and Nacht's father said that Nacht "inherited the magic and the spirit" for dealing with devils). Despite not being what their parents wanted, the younger siblings do find an honorable place for themselves in society: Ichika becomes a Ryuzen Seven and Morgen was a Magic Knight. Both families experience a tragedy and the ideal heir from either family withdraws from their younger sibling, but those events happen in different orders between the two. The Yami clan was slaughtered and then Yami left Hino while taking the blame for the incident. In the Faust family, Nacht emotionally pulling away from Morgen and going down the path of devils is what led to the confrontation in the ritual room and everyone's deaths. Nacht and Yami carry the burden of those incidents. Nacht blames and punishes himself for his crime against Morgen. Yami takes the blame for a crime he didn't commit for Ichika's sake.

The families also contrast each other. Before the Yami clan was destroyed, Yami and Ichika were rather close (Yami urged Ichika to follow him when he left the house in that one flashback). But, as said earlier, Nacht and Morgen had grown apart before Morgen's death. Yami and Ichika look remarkably different but their magics are the same. Nacht and Morgen are identical twins but their magic attributes are different (but complementary). Yami protected Ichika in the past and now has a chance to fight alongside her. Nacht hurt Morgen in the past and has to fight against him in the present. The Yami family's resolution brings them closer together and heals them. The Faust family's resolution involves once against being separated and an unending pain for Nacht.

Talk about a well-constructed narrative and characters right there.

Now that I've noted the families' connections, it's time to return my focus to solely the Fausts.

Nacht's words to himself before he re-enters the fray. Again, his thoughts turn to his own death. But here he admits that dying would be the easy way out for him. He looked down on his own life, sought his death, because dying would be an escape from having to carry the guilt for the rest of his life. Then Nacht comes a realization: "Tears don't mark the end of sin." He realizes now that leaving his emotions to stew won't resolve the sin. What Nacht needs to do is to fully atone for what he did and that will give closure for what he's held onto for so long.

Nacht's four devil Unite form isn't as complex as his other forms but it doesn't bother me. It's probably for the better that Tabata didn't try to design something that incorporated elements from all four forms. Equus gets the most representation in the four-way Devil Unite with shields and the minimal armor around his shoulders. Otherwise, Nacht is simply cloaked in shadows and the combined might of his devils (and anti-magic, can't forget the anti-magic). I love the clear view of all the facial markings brought on by the devil unions (especially since the face covering that came with Equus form made it hard to tell where the markings were!). He's lowkey matching Yami and his facial markings. AND THE CROWN OF HORNS! MY GOODNESS! My friends know how much I get worked up over Nacht and his horns. I'm positively feral that Tabata has given me canonical eight-horned Nacht! KJADHGIUAEHTHAEIHT! (Coherent thoughts, Soda!) Also, I can also tell that the combined power has made the horns manifest larger than they usually would on Nacht. Him using all four devils at once is him fully embracing his dark past. Maybe he formed his contracts with Gimodelo and the others in the wrong mindset, but things have changed. He's using an "evil" power that killed Morgen for good, to save Morgen (through death but saving regardless).

Morgen, upon seeing Nacht unleash his full potential says something he said during Nacht's flashbacks of him: that Nacht has the greatest talent for magic. He even says "I knew it" and looks eager/fascinated by what he's seeing. Morgen really does have so much faith in his older brother. It'd be sweeter if the two of them weren't on a collision course for combat.

And what a feast for the eyes the battle is. It turns into chaos, but a beautiful

The combo spell from Nacht empowered Shadow Magic and the Yamis' Dark Magic is Walpurgis Night. It's of course tied to Nacht more than the Yamis, as that event is celebrated the night and day of Nacht and Morgen's birth dates. There is so much more to Nacht and Morgen's connection to that holiday since it's about warding evil spirits and protection of witchcraft. Like, Morgen first protected Nacht from Lucifugus and now Nacht has to protect the world from the evil Morgen is enacting on behalf of Lucius. That's all I can say about that though since that's basically all I know about Walpurgis Night. (Maybe in the future I can read through all of Wikipedia's cited sources and more to actually know the whole deal.)

Morgen puts up quite the fight against three opponents, two of whom have their physical and magical abilities at their peak at the moment. He doesn't know it but these are his final moments.

So let me talk about what I've observed and come to believe about Morgen.

Morgen Faust. A man who was good incarnate. The very picture of a good man. Who loved everyone and was loved by everyone. It was in his nature to help, save, and protect others. But his perfect image hid someone who probably felt very lonely.

Let's bring back those pins we gathered earlier. The first two pins (the starting over and Morgen admitting Yami was a better partner for Nacht) are very easily connected. Morgen's dream had been to be close with Nacht, to stand side-by-side with him. But they weren't close. Then Morgen saw Yami, a stranger from a foreign land, connect to Nacht with incredible ease. It probably hurt Morgen to see that, to see that Nacht found someone else to share his joys with. Morgen didn't hate Yami for being more compatible with Nacht and even befriended Yami himself. Morgen, at least in my personal headcanons, might've seen getting close to Yami as a way of better understanding Nacht. But even though Morgen could get along with someone who was Nacht's friend, he still couldn't directly close the gap between him and his brother. Again and again, Morgen suggested Nacht join the Magic Knights but was always brushed aside. And so Morgen was left feeling frustrated and probably a little lonely too because he couldn't have the one bond he wished for.

In reading the recent chapters and looking back on old chapters regarding him, I wonder if Morgen reached out to and accepted others so easily because of his missing connection with Nacht. As in, being pushed away by Nacht made Morgen want to ensure that no one else felt rejected or left alone. It's not compensating for something he lacked, but rather a reaction of "I was hurt in the one way so I will protect others from that same hurt." I believe Morgen genuinely cared for the people he knew in some capacity though not in the same way he valued Nacht. To apply some specific terminology, Morgen holds storgic love ("Because we have the specific bond of family, I love you") for Nacht and agapic love ("Because you are a human being, I love you") for everyone else. So Morgen loved everyone. And everyone loved him back. Though I doubt the adoration of strangers did anything to soothe the ache Morgen felt over Nacht's absence in his life. Either we've experienced it ourselves or seen it represented in media: Person A has an event and want Person B there to support them; the event comes around and A discovers B isn't there so even if they win or get praise from others, not having B there makes it hard to celebrate. That's what it probably was like for Morgen not having Nacht with him.

In the end, Morgen was unable to close the rift between himself and Nacht. And it was his dying regret. Revived a Paladin, Morgen voices his desire to start over with Nacht, to make right the mistake of not being close to him when he was originally alive.

The lack of a specific bond wasn't the only thing making Morgen lonely. I think Morgen also isolated himself in a way. He put himself under pressure to be strong by himself.

Let's bring back pin three, where Morgen says he'll clear the way for a new world. Looking at that alone, he's kinda just saying that he's following Lucius's orders to fight the Magic Knights for Lucius's victory. But then put this proclamation with what Morgen said back in chapter 368:

And also what he thinks to himself in chapter 376:

He talks about fighting and being the strongest on his own.

I also want to point to how he confronted his family about their work with devils. He came to the underground ritual chamber alone, and not even while wearing his uniform as a Grey Deer on top of that. Forbidden Magic was being practiced and Morgen could've (probably should've) brought along his squad to arrest his family and their followers. But he didn't. He faced his family's sins not as a Magic Knight but merely as Morgen Faust. In Morgen's eyes, it was his family's business and thus his personal responsibility as part of it to stop them.

So we have repeated instances of Morgen voicing thoughts and acting in ways where he sets himself up to be on his own. I can think of several factors for why Morgen might have this mindset. He was the black sheep of his family and overlooked by his parents so he didn't have their support. Nacht kept his distance too. His Light Magic also meant he was looked up to, believed to be strong like the first Wizard King, just for having the attribute he had. All of these together would feed into the belief that Morgen is separate from other, for better or worse. With that belief instilled, Morgen could then tell himself that he has to rely on his own strength, that others can rely on his power alone.

Yes, Morgen seeks partnership from Nacht and works alongside Yami but ultimately tells himself he has to do things by himself. And it's possible that Morgen wanted to be closer to Nacht because he thought that only his brother, his flesh and blood, could be depended on to lessen Morgen's burdens.

Morgen becomes a lot more tragic with all this in mind. He wasn't just a pure soul who died young. He wasn't just a good man lost to sacrifice. He was a lonely person who struggled between his desire for a bond with his brother and his belief that he had to stand alone. Worse yet, he keeps on ending up alone. Other members of the former Grey Deer like Yami and William get their own squads and become more associated with those groups. Morgen by himself as a legacy member of the Grey Deer. Ten years ago and in the present day, Morgen has no one with him in death while Nacht and Yami get to continue living and working as partners.

Like the words that chapter 376 has near it's end says, "The brighter the light, the deeper the shadow it casts." All of Morgen's good, the inspiration he brought and the hope he symbolizes for others, is so bright. But it makes the shadow of sorrow that might exist within Morgen all the more saddening to me.

This is just my own reading of Morgen so take what I've said with a grain of salt but... At least for me, Morgen has gained a whole new depth to his character thanks to these new chapters and how it made things from before clicking into place for me. I don't always like Tabata's handling of the story, but I do love what he's given me for me to draw the conclusions I have.

Well that's Morgen's finale. And now for my last statement on Nacht's part of the chapters.

Quick observation: to me, part of Nacht's horn set up from his four-way Unite, resembles Morgen's own. From Slotos and Plumede, Nacht gets horns that point outward and curse in a way that matches Lucifugus's horns.

You can best compare it here and even with Nacht partially obscured... I can see the similarity.

Moving on, or rather moving back to the line, "the brighter the light, the deeper the shadow it casts." It brings to mind that one quote "for the greater the love the greater the grief" by C.S. Lewis. It captures part of the core to Nacht's character. His love for Morgen was so deep that the grief of losing him transformed him as a person. Morgen's light of hope was so bright and it makes Nacht's shadow of despair dark.

But the true essence of who Nacht is comes from the last words in the chapter, his last words to Morgen.

"Goodbye, Morgen. I will shoulder this pain forever."

Nacht regretted his sin, punished himself for it, and atoned for it through killing Morgen a second time. This is his closure for the past. But even with that, Nacht cannot - will not - is let go of his sin or the pain it's caused him. It's a part of him for the rest of his life. He will find it in himself to live and maybe even find happiness, but the love and happiness he got from having Morgen around will never be replaced or filled in. Morgen is lost forever and so Nacht will mourn forever.

Part of me is sad to know that Nacht has committed himself to such feelings. But a greater part of me understands that it's a part of his character and loves him for it. He holds on, to his emotions or the people he cares for, so fiercely to the point of it hurting him. It's probably not a healthy mindset to have but Nacht's fictional so we can let it slide. I see it as tragic but also admirable.

To me, this is the real end of Nacht's arc. First in Spade, he had to learn that despite his faults, there were people who cared for him enough to save him. And now on Judgment Day, Nacht faces his sin head on and gives it a resolution, thus accepting all he's done and all of himself where he once projected his self-loathing onto others.

I'm left with bittersweet feelings from these chapters. There was beautiful art. I developed a deeper appreciation for characters who aren't my favorite characters. The characters that I do adore above all the rest got a spotlight on them. Morgen and Nacht both showed off incredible feats of power and their story got an ending. All good things. But I've also come to see a much sadder side to Morgen beyond being a black sheep. And Nacht's statement of eternal pain brings me to actual tears just thinking of it. I'm also upset that unlike Acier, Morgen isn't shown giving a goodbye to his family but I can still hope that chapter 377 spares page time for that. But even with these sad notes, I'm happy because I can better appreciate the Fausts with what I've been shown.

I love these chapters and the stories they tell/finish. I can't wait for the physical volume containing the chapters so I can return to them over and over again.

I hope that this post wasn't boring or too repetitive. I hope it made sense. I had to bounce around in the chapters' details and even called back to older chapters to get my points across. I just... had a lot to say. Several times while writing this, I ended up going back to add onto a topic I thought I'd finished (I'm looking at you Yami family and the Walpurgis Night spell).

I didn't have any plans for what I was going to say. I knew I was going to talk about how the Yami and Faust family dynamics closed out and the development of my perception of Morgen. But a lot of things just came to me as I wrote. And I think that worked for the best.

Thank you to whoever was able to power through this massively long post. Or even just read specific parts. Anyone looking at this post at all would mean something to me because while I mostly write this so my head and heart wouldn't explode from keeping it all inside, being heard by another is nice.

Thank you to any readers. Thank you, Tabata for writing Black Clover. Thank you, Yami and Ichika for your shared arc and contributions to this chapter. And thank you, Nacht and Morgen Faust for lighting my soul on fire.