#soap opera milkman

[likeanormalhuman]

The Soap Opera Milkman Scene

Below the break is the second chapter of my current Doppelganger Francis x Doorman fic. Featuring soap opera dream sequence. Chapter below the break, fic on AO3 here (Currently rated M).

Chapter 2: When the real milkman came through—fit in a clean pressed uniform without a single speck of scarlet milk on him—the doorman buried her feelings in her checklist.  Because if a doppelgänger didn’t kill her, then surely one of those days, her embarrassment would.

“Paperwork looks correct.  ID matches,” she said.  She hesitated a moment.  Then stood up and peered down the glass window.  Yep.  His pants and shoes were pristine white.

Francis Mosses gave her a look that might have been quizzical were he not so dead eyed and tired.

“Just, uh, checking.  You know.  For, uh, scarlet milk,” she said, tongue already tripping on its way to betray her.

“What?” Francis Mosses said.

“Well, uh, there’s chocolate milk and strawberry milk.  Maybe scarlet milk is the next big thing,” she said.  With her foot in her mouth already, it seemed like she ought to just place the whole boot in there too.

Francis Mosses didn’t quite frown at her, but the line of his mouth did seem to deepen into that direction.  “There is no such thing as scarlet milk,” he said after a beat.

“...Right.  You’re absolutely right.  And you would know, since, you know, you’re a milkman,” she said, mortified, and quickly went back to her papers.

What was she even doing? s he thought to herself as she stared at the blank space between the checkboxes.  The doppelgänger hadn’t even been able to pick up on puns, but had known immediately about her silly little crush.  She didn’t stand a chance against an actual human being like the real Francis Mosses.  The papers beneath her fingers crinkled, and she quickly dropped her gaze down and smoothed them back out.

This was ridiculous.  If she was going to go so far as to be ashamed of being ashamed, she thought, she might as well let the doppelgängers take her and be done with it.

Be brave.  Be bold.  Be like Henry, but better, she chanted the mantra to herself.

Henry wouldn’t get worked up over a crush.  Henry wouldn’t care if said crush knew about it.  Heck, Henry wouldn’t even care if a random doppelganger knew about it.  …Well, because Henry would have just exterminated all of them, innocent or otherwise, but still…

“Everything is in order,” she said at last, clearing her throat and marking off her checklist.  She pressed the button on the left.  “Have a pleasant day.”

Francis Mosses didn’t say anything in response.  He merely gave a brief, tired nod, and then disappeared from view.

Alone with only the dirty glass and dusty wallpaper to look at, the doorman let out a long breath.  She slumped down in her seat, all the professionalism leaving her posture, and hit the switch to close off the building for the day.  Heavy metal shutters slammed down, and her shift was at an end.

Mentally and physically and mortifyingly emotionally run through, the doorman stuffed her adverbs down with a TV dinner for one in the cramped apartment assigned to her at the back of the building.

“Too tired for two faced two timers?  Try Divorce Attorneys ‘R Us today!” said the chipper broadcaster on the telly that had come with the room.  “If there's reasonable doubt they're not a doppelgänger, you may not even owe alimony!”   

She stabbed at a half frozen pea and switched the channel.

“...Doppelgänger activity at an all time high.  Self proclaimed human lifestyle expert Frederick Franzber joins us now to teach our audience his top ten tips to tell if your date is truly human—”

She flipped through the channels, this time landing on a staticky soap opera.

“...oh, Lewis, my love!” the buxom blonde actress crooned.  “How I have missed you!  …but what is with the new mustache, my darling dearest?  You are always so clean shaven…”

“That is because I am not Lewis!” the chiseled chin man declared.

The woman gasped and pressed a hand to her cleavage.  “Then…can it be?  After all these years?”

“Yes!” The man grabbed her around her waist and pulled her close against his half-bared chest. “I am not Lewis, but his long lost twin brother Luis!  Here to take back the life he stole from me, including the woman I loved!”

“Oh, Luis!”

“Oh, Lois!”

The actors kissed passionately on screen.

The doorman quickly switched the TV off, and went straight to bed.

She opened the door and there he was.

He didn’t say a word as he entered.  He didn’t need to.  He simply stepped up to her, his shirt already undone, and took her in his limber arms, not even looking at her eyes like he already knew the sin of her soul.

“Oh, Francis,” she tried to croon, but her voice caught and made it sound more like a croak.

His arm tightened around her waist, and she curled closer against him, guided by her own yearning.  She reached out to brush against pale smooth skin, stretched taut over muscles dusted with fine, dark brown hair that she wanted to curl her fingers into.  The light was distractingly in her eyes, but she could trace his form clearly as she drew her eyes back over his shoulders, the unbuttoned uniform hanging loosely from them in long white stripes like he was one of those great marbled gods in their regal chitons.  He could be in a museum, she found herself thinking.  But she was glad he was not.  Otherwise she would never be able to touch him like this, would never be able to be touched by him like this…

“How I have missed you…  But you are already practically out of uniform.  And you are usually such a careful dresser…what are you even doing here?” she found herself saying, even though that was not what she wanted to be doing.  

He did not answer, but instead danced his fingers lazily down her sides in response, counting a slow rhythm along her ribs before trailing to the soft skin of her belly, and then dipping down lower, lower, lower…

She shuddered, and leaned in, wanting so desperately for more of him.   He touched her, but kept his face above hers, present and pressing, but not dipping low enough to meet her eyes nor to kiss her lips.  He was right there with her, yet out of reach.  Oh, she yearned for him to be closer.  Yearned for him not just between her legs, but flooded through every sense of her being: touched, seen, heard, smelled, and tasted.  

She wondered if he would taste like milk.

“That is because I am not Francis,” he said at last, breathing air into the space between them that she wished wasn’t there.

“How…  Can it be?...” her voice trailed off, losing its grip on the script.

“Yes,” he said.  “I am not Francis, but ‘Francis’.  Here to take the life stolen from me…”

And his lips parted wider.  

And she could see fangs.

And she tasted iron.

The doorman woke up, having bitten her tongue.

And that was how the doorman swore off watching soap operas before bed.

[tilbageidanmark]

Movies I watched this week (#173):

3 by young Chinese prodigy Gu Xiaogang:

🍿 Even though Dwelling in the Fuchun Mountains is his first (and only) feature so far, it feels so mature, as if an old master put it out after a long and successful career.

It's an slow epic saga (2.5 long hours) of a large family struggling during four seasons through life's ups and down in this provincial city. It's a metaphor for a classic scroll painting from the 14 century, and apparently only the first chapter in an upcoming trilogy. A tremendous, slow-moving achievement told in magnificent style, and half a dozen transcendental set pieces. 10/10 - Best experience of the week!

I was steeped in that Chinese mentality and culture, that of practicality, resourcefulness, tradition and hope, for nearly a decade, and I miss it. 💯 score on Rotten Tomatoes.

🍿 The Sail of Cinema (2020), a beautiful mood piece which can be used as a perfect introduction to his work. Bonus points for use of 'Moonlight Sonata'. 10/10.

🍿 As Spring Comes Along (2024), a short art poem about a couple who hasn't seen each other for a long time.

🍿

Menashe (2017) is one of the few films in Yiddish that I've seen (Not too many of them, eh?). A24 indie production from 2017 about a Hasidic widower, struggling to keep his 10-year-old son with him, within the restrictive ultra-orthodox Jewish community in Brooklyn.

I dislike all religions equally (Well, some more than others...) but this is an uncritically and authentic beautiful piece of film making. Especially since the 'hero' is an unlikely ordinary man and he's not going to change. 8/10.

🍿

The Red Sea Makes Me Wanna Cry, my first film from Jordan. An enigmatic, nearly wordless story of a young woman who travels to the desolate outskirts of Aqaba in search of Ismail who had disappeared without explanation. 6/10.

🍿

10 more selections from the US National Film Registry, all seen for the first time:

🍿 Newark Athlete is the earliest film in the collection; a 12 second silent short from 1891, produced at The Edison Studio.

[ Also, The "Phonautograms" recordings by Edouard-Leon Stott de Martinville, the earliest known sound recording from 1853!]

🍿 The Corbett-Fitzsimmons Fight, a 1897 documentary of a championship prizefight boxing match, which took place in Nevada. At over 100 minutes, it was the world's first (and longest) feature film. But only 19 minutes survived today.

🍿 The classic The Great Train Robbery (1903), my first film by Edwin S. Porter, director of over 250 silent films. A "sensationalized Headliner", which included a separate close-up shot of the outlaw leader shooting directly at the camera. My r/todayilearned post: After retiring from the movies, the actor who played the lead robber, (Photo Above) became a milkman. 9/10.

🍿 First viewing of Gone with the wind was not what I expected! I knew it was a bloated confederacy 'Lost Cause' fanfiction and a revisionist myth-making, glorifying slavery and the fantasy of the antebellum South. But I also thought it was the 'greatest love story of all time', and that was harder to get. Scarlett O'Hara grew to become a strong woman with fierce survival skills, but she was so flawed; Vain, selfish, conniving and unscrupulous. Her lover and third husband, Clark Gable, was no hero either. Their tragic on-again off-again love story was a 4 hour long soap opera. The gorgeous cinematography and massive production were breath-taking though. 4/10.

🍿 All the King's Men, a fictionalized and badly-dramatized story about the corruption of power. A veiled story about populist Louisiana governor Huey Long, how he rose from humble ideological beginnings to become a power-hungry despot. 4/10.

My first film by Robert Rossen, who was blacklisted for being a communist sympathizer, but who later "named" 57 of his friends to Joseph McCarthy's HUAC. I need to watch 'The Hustler'!

🍿 "There are plenty of warm rolls in the bakery; stop pressing your nose against the window!"

Pillow Talk, a frothy romantic comedy with Rock Hudson and Doris Day. A charming story about two neighbors who have to share a party-line, a phone technology that is now all but forgotten. Like Ted Gioia, I love Doris Day's jazz singing, so in spite of the out-dated genre politics, I found this light-hearted movie lovely and enjoyable.

🍿 Saul Bass was world-famous for his astounding graphic designs and inventive title sequences. But he also directed a few films, one of which, Why Man Creates, won the 1968 Oscar for Short Documentary. It's a whimsical plaything, with Bass's geometrical genius and good-nature foolery on display. Strong whiff of Terry Gilliam wildness and style. George Lucas was an un-credited second unit cameramen on the film. 🍿 Quasi at the Quackadero, a home-made 'Yellow submarine' inspired psychedelic short, about 2 ducks and a robot at an amusement park. Made by a 'Sesame Street' animator, it's like Max Fleischer on acid. M'eh. [*Female Director*].

🍿 Before Stonewell, an informative 1994 documentary about how gay people existed before the Stonewall riots. Fascinating, even if you knew much of it. Oppression, hatred, uprising. [*Female Director*].

🍿 Scratch and Crow was a symbolic, non-narrative word-less art-short by an indie artist, Helen Hill, who was murdered at 36 in New Orleans. [*Female Director*].

🍿

4 Documentaries:

🍿 City of Gold, my first atmospheric documentary by Canadian Colin Low. A pleasant nostalgic trip back to the small Yukon town of Dawson City, which for one summer in 1895 was the center of the Klondike Gold Rush. Its slow panning style, overlapped with soothing narration, inspired Ken Burns to develop his famous 'Ken Burns Effect'. Winner of the 1957 Cannes Festival, and nominated for an Oscar. 9/10.

🍿 A day in Tokyo was created in 1968 by the Japan National Tourism Organization to promote tourism in the rebuilt city. It captured the time, 23 years after it's destruction, when it was ready to take its place as the primer metropolis of the world. It tells of its history from the Edo period until then, (but it doesn't mention the war).

🍿 "He articulated what the rest of us wanted to say, but couldn't say..."

When Martin Scorsese kicks the bucket, sometime in the near future, his obituaries will lead with 'Taxi Driver' and 'Raging Bull'. But besides his 27 features, his World Cinema Project, acting in commercials, producing, etc, he also directed 17 documentaries, including 5 excellent music docs, all about "our" sounds and times, and "our" heroes.

No direction home: Bob Dylan (2005) is centered on a lengthy interview Scorsese did with the 'bard' about his early years, leading up to his 1966 bike accident. Re-Watch ♻️. Here's my 2003 "Grow-a-brain" Bob Dylan link-blog.

🍿 Related: Joan Baez: I am a noise is her recent biography, embarking on her career-ending tour at 79, while reflecting back to a full life of peaks and traumas. I loved her music deeply all my life (her, as well as her beautiful sister Mimi!), and she always meant so much to me.

And of course, I will always remember the time on June 11, 1984, when I met her walking down the street, and she kissed me on the mouth... [*Female Director*].

🍿

"Would you like to come in for a cup of tea - or perhaps something stronger?..."

Return to Glennascaul (1951) is a spooky Irish ghost story, framed and narrated by Orson Welles, as he picks up a stranded motorist on a dark and (not) stormy night on his way to Dublin...

🍿

Re-watch: Laurel and Hardy classic The Music Box, (1932). These two numbskulls never learn. 9/10. ♻️

🍿

2 by Argentinian Mario Soffici:

🍿 Italian-born Soffici directed some of the highest rated Argentinian films of the classic era.

His Rosaura at 10 O'Clock (1958) is a strange crime drama with a story that changes so much, that it's hard to know what is true and what fiction. It takes place at a boarding house, where a shy painter starts getting perfumed love letters, and the nosy owner who meddles in his affairs. It turn out to be nearly like 'Rashomon', where everybody has their own story. There's one violent scene where a pimp beats up a woman brutally and unexpectedly.

🍿 For many decades, Prisoners of the Land (1939) was considered as the "Greatest Argentinian movie". It's a tragic revenge story about peasants fighting a cruel plantation owner in the jungles of 1915, a drunk doctor and his beautiful daughter. Very John Huston and South American Herzog-like in sweaty, feudal nightmares of whip lashing and booze.

🍿

Another film from Argentina, Viruta, is a high-production home movie made by a woman named Otilia Shifres. Her grandparents emigrated to Buenos Aires from Grodno, a small town in Poland, at the turn of the 20th century. In the film she searches for and constructs a family tree of the relatives that were left behind, going all the way to 1770. It's impressively slick for an amateur feature-length project.

The only reason I came across this personal documentary is because my own father, Eli, (who died in 2016 in Israel at the age of 90) is one of the relatives whom she discovers, and my two sisters even make an appearance in the film (at 56:00) telling her about our side of the family! [*Female Director*].

🍿

"Why don't you study a blank piece of paper for a while, and improve your mind?..."

Ready, willing and able (1937), a second-rate Broadway-style song-and dance musical, trying to emulate the finesse of better talents (like Fred Astaire and Ginger Rogers). But this un-charismatic movie is the one which introduced the Johnny Mercer song 'Too Marvelous for Words', and it ended with The fantastic Typewriter Dance, an over-the-top Busby Berkeley style number.

🍿

Alan Partridge: Alpha Papa (2013), my first film with the cringey wanker character of Alan Partridge. It opens with the Philip Glass Koyaanisqatsi theme, which was nice, but the pompous, misogynistic radio host asshole didn't resonate with me. 3/10.

🍿

Throw-back to the Adora Art project:  

Adora as Bob Dylan and with Suze Rotolo.

Adora with my sister, Dafna.

🍿  

(My complete movie list is here)

[watching-pictures-move]

Put On Your Raincoats #40 | Hard Soap, Hard Soap (Chinn, 1977)

This review contains mild spoilers.

Laurien Dominique has marital troubles. You see, her husband Dr. John Holmes the psychiatrist can't get it up. And her friend Candida Royalle (one of whose first lines is "Look, no crotch!", to which Dominique responds "Lou, I'm eating") doesn't seem to take it very seriously ("My husband can't get it up and you wanna joke"). Or when she does, the advice she offers is of limited help ("You gotta show him crotch"). To tackle the problem, the two of them embark on a series of sexual misadventures. There's the trip Royalle makes to Holmes' office incognito (she wears a ski mask) and fucks a patient she mistakes for Holmes' character (and promptly punches him in the dick once she realizes her mistake). There's a milkman to whom Dominique offers to judge the size of his organ while unloading about her marital troubles, briefly interrupting the proceedings to put away the milk, and then having to help recover from a heart attack when Royalle walks in.

At this point, Dominique gets the bright idea that she wants to help people with their problems, like the Peeping Tom whom they indulge, although Royalle briefly expresses her annoyance ("Take it easy, this isn't a goddamned watermelon!"). She also decides to pitch in at the office, mostly bungling the act of answering the phones and then pissing off a janitor (or as he calls himself, a "maintenance engineer") played by Paul Thomas, who then has his way with her. (This is probably the weakest part of the movie, mean spirited in ways the movie otherwise mostly avoids. It also heavily features the dreaded under the balls angle, although there's the intermittent lens flare to block half the screen, so it is perhaps a bit more bearable than average in this respect.) The main set piece of the film is a group therapy session that Dominique and Royalle try to run in Holmes' absence, mostly by fucking the patients or letting them get it on with each other. (Highlights include a mime dressed as the Big Bad Wolf trying to get it on with another patient dressed as Red Riding Hood, and Royalle doing double duty with a pair of brothers who argue and spasm as she does the deed.) Finally Dominique is paid a visit by her sister, who claims to have gone blind after being flashed, and posits that the only cure is a 14-inch dick. ("Fourteen inches long? That was no flasher, that was a fucking horse!") Cue the dramatic music. Enter John Holmes. Will this be the solution to everyone's problems?

Hard Soap, Hard Soap was apparently the first comedy Bob Chinn directed, and judging by the results, he took the genre like a fish to water. It's a pornographic parody of soap operas, and while I'm not quite familiar enough with the genre to say how astute a parody it is, I laughed pretty often. As you can guess from the title, the primary reference point is Mary Hartman, Mary Hartman, and Chinn cites his sources, placing a magazine with Louise Lasser in-character on the cover in one scene.) I think the usual jab at porn is over the contrived scenarios, but that's entirely the point here, with one ridiculous situation after another resulting from the heroines' misguided attempts to find a solution to their problems. Chinn has in his arsenal a great sense of timing, punctuating jokes with over-the-top organ music that only makes the jokes that much funnier, and sneaking in deft audiovisual gags (car crash noises and sirens on the soundtrack during a sex scene, a steadily accumulating collection of cigarette butts to mark an extended bout of lovemaking). Working with a larger budget than he was accustomed to, he gives the movie a pretty distinct look thanks to the campy set design and careful visual direction. (Note the theatrical staging of the group therapy scene, or the heart-shaped cutout of the Fonz in the bedroom.)

As far as the sex scenes go, Chinn does take care to craft them into gags while delivering the goods (more than one scene ends with Royalle punching somebody in the dick), and avoids going to certain obvious places. (At the risk of sounding like a degenerate, I must report that the group therapy does not devolve into a gangbang, nor do the heroines partake in a lesbian scene. I guess narrative integrity is important.) There are a few less than politically correct jabs (as you can guess, the group therapy scene is not a sensitive portrayal of mental illness, and there are other gags involving gay and trans characters that might be seen as punching down), but the overall vibe is genial enough that I had a hard time getting offended. But the real reason the movie succeeds is the chemistry between the lead actresses, with Dominique as the more sincere one and Royalle as the feistier one, proving to be great comic foils for each other. (Chinn would reunite with them and Holmes in the very entertaining Hot & Saucy Pizza Girls, where they're joined by Christine De Shaffer as a bitchy adversary for Royalle and Desiree Cousteau as the adorably naive Ann Chovy and Chinn himself as their coworker, as all of them work together to foil the mysterious Night Chicken, a dirty tricks operator hired by a competing fried chicken syndicate trying to shut down their pizzeria. Chinn's direction is good enough to be almost invisible, juggling the likable cast members and their tremendous chemistry seamlessly to keep the good vibes coming. The skateboard scenes help too.) And in the interest of transparency, I must note that in one scene, Royalle wears a getup that I'm tempted to describe as "sexy pirate", and folks, I'm not made of stone.

[hotpinkstaples]

The more Yamihime I write. The more I convince myself thag Nacht's brother is Asta's father.

kjdrngskdg at this point, I feel like anyone can be Asta’s pappy, and you know what??? Good for him!!! Anything can go, and I am for that because it’ll just make the whole situation even more hilarious. Between Lucifero, Nacht’s brother, Hage’s milkman, and Dante, the only real victor is Orsi Orfai because he actually raised the boy. 

I will say, however, that if Nacht knew Asta was his nephew and still left him at Orsi’s and never tried to make contact despite claiming he was in the shadows, then I will be clowning him until the end because that kind of deadbeat behavior is only appropriate for a daytime soap opera, and if Nacht wanna act like a deadbeat from a soap opera, then he gon be treated like one!!!

[blorbosexterminator]

AND I am back. Once again on this lovely day to give my review for the EPISODE 24 so, here we go :

Agustin is squinting his eyes at him, as Sergio keeps muttering that Agustin has in fact done what he just mentioned he did and which both of them have known for years. 

Federico is 99% dead?! Damn, what is Sergio's gonna do?! Make it 100% ? 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

(I got a feeling that Federico is the kidnapper or atleast a very important lead to them)

Btw, WHO IS FEDERICO?! Tatiana's alive husband?!

(Look at me, hoping like a moron she aint dead

My dog : Yep, total moron 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

Me :

Me : NOBODY ASKED FOR YOUR BITCH-ASS OPINION, YOU DUMB-FUCK DONKEY!!!! 😡😡😡)

Martin, my darling, my sweetheart, my poor angel. Nada, some help? Atleast gimme some tips, bruh, come on, you cant desert me like that. Not when I need to help someone 🙁🙁🙁

since, drunk, the last idea he got was that Laura turned out to be completely insane and kidnapped Andrés to marry him

🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣 Martin, honey, stop drinking. This getting out of hand 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣. But then again, Andres is so hot poor thing keeps on doubting.

As Roci said in one of the tags, his wives deserve the highest civilian award for putting up with him.

(Although, I just had a frisky thought. What if Sergio wanted Andres away from Martin, not because he cared bout his hermano but......😳😳😳😳😳 *whispers loudly* he wanted Andres all for himself? In *frantically looks around* INCEST WAY?!)

(Calm down, my deranged mind, you went too far 🤣🤣🤣)

Who knows, it could be the professor he punched in the middle of an exam once. Martín doesn’t think he has forgiven him.

Mood, bruh, such a mood 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣 NO, OMG 😆😆😆 I didnt do it, but I do kinda have a beef with my Organic prof. I'll go off tangent again, so tell me if you wanna know the story.

He sent Silene in disguise to collect the cctv from the nearby shops and streets. His own cctv has been disabled since the IT bitch ruined it, Martín will kill him when he gets them back.

I think if and only IF Silene finds something good, her % of redemption will increase.

(Raquel s2e7 deja vu, I see what you did there 😏)

And Martin about to go John Wick on anyone & everyone. I tell ya Keanu Reeves will be crying when he sees Martin go nuts. I am willing to bet he'll pull a gun on the poor milkman, who just wanna do his job 😆😆😆

So he calls Bogota, with a little (not that little) handwritten list in his hand with the names of people he thinks he might have ruined their life in the past. 

Martin : Okay, I'll just take out the list and

*the paper rolls out the door, travels around the world for 5 times and comes back while going over top of Everest and bottom of Marina Trench*

No, it’s because when he hated Martín, he had always hated him openly. If he wanted to hurt him, then he’d just try to stab him in the middle of the living room.

🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

“Bogota, did Tatiana have any family?”

“No, who of us did, Martín?”

“You literally have 7 children and 7 ex-wives.”

COMEDY GOLD, NADA 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

“Those kids are ungrateful bastards, if I fall dead tomorrow they would just run to see what they’ve inherited.”

Aka THE PLOT of 70% Indian Telenovas 🤣🤣🤣. Also this line alone has so much soap opera vibes 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

He has no choice but to go to fucking Sergio Marquina. And if it’s his wife, then even better. Keep your friends close but keep your enemies closer. 

For fuck sake, Martín, Ive been telling you from last 2 ep

Stop. Blaming. Raquel.

Also, 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣 damn, these 2 assholes cant keep away from each other. Nada, are we sure these 2 married the right people? As much I am a Berlermo ship stan, this here is just smth else 😆😆😆

Uh-oh 🙁 this asshole son of a bitch just poked the mama bear. And if ANDRES of all people narrows his eyes at you, You are, quoting Martin from last ep, truly, utterly, entirely, thoroughly and wholly fucked.

“Do you know him?”

“Oh yes, a childhood friend, I stole his pencil once and he never forgave me. Have you heard this Paula? Don’t steal your friends’ pencils, they will never get over the betrayal. You could steal the teacher’s ones though.”

“Why did you steal his pencil?” Paula asked seriously, with a delirious tone, and too tired to even move her head upwards. Raquel is gonna kill every single person involved for doing this to her daughter.

🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣 Sassy Andres = Best Andres. Words that should be written with GOLD. Wisdom passed onto generations

Poor Paula 🤣🤣🤣 I just imagine this in some other situation :

Andres : *saying smth smth*

Paula : *taking notes & asking questions*

Raquel after seeing her daughter :

Look what you made me do

🎶But I got smarter, I got harder in the nick of time

Honey, I rose up from the dead, I do it all the time

I got a list of names, and yours is in red, underlined

I check it once, then I check it twice, oh!

Ooh, look what you made me do

Look what you just made me do🎶

(Look what you made me do by Taylor Swift)

I am telling you Nada, by the time Raquel will be done with everyone, Uma Thurman will cry buckets because no one, okay?, no one can compete with A MAMA BEAR RAQUEL MURILLO.

“Poison is a woman’s choice of weapon, Anibal. Don’t be disrespectful.”

Again, words of wisdom. Only time hes not being a misogynist.

Also, Andres, my dear, are you speaking this from experience?

(Why do I think that Martin got Tatiana killed cause she poisoned him and Martin had to watch Andres fight for his life in hospital?)

“He won’t say anything, Mama. He’s the one who kidnapped grandma with Silene!”

Is anyone gonna listen to her? Or do I need to bonk Raquel myself? 🤦‍♀️

“Silence!” she screams. “I need to know everything that happened, if we’re getting out of here alive.” 

FINALLY!!!! SOME COMMON SENSE!!!! WE THANK THE LORD FOR MERCY!!!

And as for me, its time for me to say goodbye and goodnight (Cause its quarter to 12 rn in my watch)

AND ILL SEE YALL TOMORROW 🤗 BYE!!! 🙋‍♀️

I'm back as well! And we've finally caught up with each other.

Valid reaction. Sergio is also slowly going insane. Love that for him.

He's hoping he could. We all know this family has beef with that last one percentage.

(we'll see👀👀👀)

Hope is all we got at this point afabgs.

Now, now, don't speak to him like that. He has valid criticism.

I'd help him if I could, but alas (lmfao no, I do love them suffering)

Same recommendation. But he just, poor boy, could nothing to think of. So might as well be Laura. (also fair, who knows, maybe Andrés gets constantly kidnapped and forced into marriage)

Definitely, she's 100%. I really don't know how they do it.

Avsnsjsvjshsjs all theories are valid. Maybe Sergio does want Martín or Andrés, who knows what goes in the head of that fucker.

Seems like an interesting story! I never got along with my chemistry teachers. (Got one once to tell me that he's still not kicking me out of class only because he feels bad for my parents that they have to deal with me and they'll be the ones who will have to deal with the mess lmfao.)

Yes, have some faith in her!

100% accurate. Martín is this close from just shooting random people in the supermarket because they also could be the ones who kidnapped Andrés.

HAHAHA YES. This is exactly how the scene went.

We stan honesty in this house.

So happy you found it funny!!

I can confirm! Like 70% of all Egyptian drama as well.

I don't think he's hearing you well. But afnajscsgsh SAME. Okay look, now I really understand show runners with super homoerotic ships that they refuse to make canon. You try and make two male characters hate each other so much for plot then it slips and gets homoerotic.

Totally agree. This guy isn't making enemies with the right people (they are all dumb, but also none of them have anything that even resembles a moral compass)

Totally agree. This guy is honestly super amusing to watch and it's mainly because he's incapable of taking any situation in life seriously.

This family is really iconic. (love the song agsnsg) but also like Raquel would basically tell her after writing done his notes just put the title on top: things to never, ever, do.

I believe you! They really fucked with the wrong dumb family.

I mean, he's still a misogynist. Maybe some of us really like dagger, has he considered that?

That's as valid theory as any right there.

Hopefully Raquel will finally start listening to the child!

Raquel is the only one with a semblance of common sense.

Hope you had a good sleep! I'll see you tomorrow!

[stronghours]

library:

READ - Kristen Arnett’s Mostly Dead Things and it sucked pretty much.

READ(ing) - I am almost done with these collected Frank O’Connor short stories i love him

UPCOMING READING MATHEMATICS: I have a whole bit planned out where i check out A Little Life and Garth Greenwell’s What Belongs to You and read them back to back or simultaneously since Greenwell has such a boner for Yanagihara. Greenwell already seems very self-important to me, and his books’ obsession with physical and sexual desire (at the cost of everything else, it seems) plus the poorly disguised author expy doesn’t do much to convince me otherwise. anyway these authors go together so I will go from heinous sexual religious crimes to self-obsessed bathroom fuckin.

BUT: A Little Life is 814 pages. I’ve been meaning to read those two books Sally Rooney wrote and I can’t decide if I should put off the greenwell/yanagihara party and get those novels out of the way. among other things, the Rooney books seem a lot less sensational and a lot more dry (i suspect i will be bored to tears reading them - i read some excerpts and it was just....oh noooooooo) but after disliking Mostly Dead Things I just want some soap opera, you know. so I will be weighing what to start first 

ALSO: I don’t dislike all the new stuff! I recently finished Milkman by Anna Burns and I liked it so much - I think it did a tough-to-accomplish thing when an author uses first person as well as stream of consciousness - in that it employs enough skill that we don’t feel trapped or stifled in the narrator’s head, because the narration does such a good job of illustrating the community/environment that surrounds the narrator.

SO: that’s it

[hopelessromanticlittleshit]

I finally finished Milkman by Anna Burns. It was a bit slow going for me at first. I don’t think first person narration is my favourite storytelling mode. Especially when the book has such a strong voice. But it was such a magnificent slow-build that towards the middle/end of the book I found myself yelling at the book like my ouma used to yell at soap operas. The voice of the of the protagonist is so hilarious and at times so paranoid that I found myself questioning the reality she was presenting us. Like, is she mad? Set the during The Troubles in Northern Ireland, we get through the entire book without ever hearing the word “Ireland” or actually any name (almost). Just a really, really unique book. I’m going to miss it. 📚 🏃🏾‍♀️ 🐱 • • • • • #books #book #bookstagram #reading #booklover #bibliophile #bookcovers #bookaddict #booklover #bookblogger #bookphotographer #booksofinstagram #instabooks #bookcollector #read #reader #belletristbabe #bookofthemonth #annaburns #milkman #northernireland #faberandfaber #faber&faber (at Weltevredenpark, Gauteng, South Africa) https://www.instagram.com/p/CA-6qOvnCxg/?igshid=1eu06nsn4xtwz

[papermoonloveslucy]

LUCY, THE OTHER WOMAN

S5;E7 ~ October 23, 1972

Directed by Coby Ruskin ~ Written by Fred S. Fox and Seaman Jacobs

Synopsis

Lucy's milkman has a crush on her but his angry wife (Totie Fields) thinks Lucy is having an affair with the dairy deliveryman.  

Regular Cast

Lucille Ball (Lucy Carter), Gale Gordon (Harrison Otis Carter), Lucie Arnaz (Kim Carter)

Guest Cast

Totie Fields (Mrs. Poopsie Butkus, the Milkman's Wife) was born Sophie Feldman in 1927 (some sources cite 1930).  'Totie' was a childhood nickname derived from a baby's pronunciation of 'Sophie'.  She was a nightclub comedienne whose first big break came on “The Ed Sullivan Show.” After that, she appeared on many TV talk and variety shows.  This appearance was just one of handful of 'acting' jobs.  Fields was diabetic and had a leg amputation in 1976.  Her health declined afterwards and she died in 1978.  

Mr. and Mrs. Butkus have five children.

Herbie Faye (Lester Butkus, the Milkman) was a character whose first major acting role (at age 56) was Corporal Sam Fender in “The Phil Silvers Show” (1955). He also appeared with Silvers on Broadway in Top Banana (1951) and also did the film version (1954) with Silvers. He appeared in a 1968 episode of “The Lucy Show.”  This is fourth and final “Here’s Lucy” episode.

According to the insignia on his hat, Mr. Butkus works for the Cloverleaf Dairy.

Roy Rowan (Radio Newscaster Voice, uncredited) was the off-camera announcer for every episode of “I Love Lucy” as well as “The Lucy Show” and “Here’s Lucy.” He was also the voice heard when TV or radio programs were featured on the plot of all three shows. He was first heard announcing the TV football game in “Lucy is a Referee” (S1;E3). His first on-camera appearance was in “Lucy Takes Up Golf” (S2;E17).  

Lucille Ball had this episode especially written to suit the talents of Totie Fields, whom she greatly admired.

This is the first episode aired in season 5 where Lucille Ball is on her feet after her skiing accident and breaking her leg.  She does, however, still have a cast on her foot.  Mr. Butkus, the milkman, asks how her leg is feeling and how she came to break it.  Lucy says she didn't come to break it, she came to go skiing!

Mr. Butkus's wife sends Lucy an anonymous threatening letter. Kim jokingly says the letter is from Elizabeth Taylor.  Lucy joins in the joke yelling for Richard [Burton] to come out of the closet. Richard Burton and Elizabeth Taylor were one of Hollywood's most famous couples.  They appeared in “Lucy Meets the Burtons” (S3;E1) in 1970.  

Lucy listens to a radio news report about a marital triangle that caused a Mrs. Mercedes Smith of Sherman Oaks to shoot a Mrs. Vivian Boone for breaking up her happy home.  

Totie Fields was considered a female Don Rickles.  As such she hurls some of her trademark barbs at Lucy: 

“Under-weight, over-height, skinny, scrawny, and wearing a freaked out wig!”

Once again, Lucy denies wearing a wig, but in reality Lucille Ball was wigged.

Harry says Lucy's plight with the milkman sounds like a bad opera.  Kim quips “Yeah. Madame Buttermilk.” Kim is making a pun about the Puccini opera Madame Butterfly first written in 1904.  It is now part of the classical opera repertoire worldwide.

When Kim asks if she thinks Poopsie will leave her husband, Lucy says “Giving up a Butkus isn't exactly like giving up Paul Newman.” Handsome movie star Paul Newman (1925-2008) was mentioned by Patty Andrews in “Lucy and the Andrews Sisters” (S2;E6).  

When Mr. Butkus shows up on Lucy's doorstep suitcases in hand, Harry calls him “the curdled Casanova.”  Giacomo Girolamo Casanova (1725-98) was an Italian adventurer and author whose autobiography is regarded as one of the most authentic sources of the customs and norms of European social life during the 18th century. He has become so famous for his often complicated and elaborate affairs with women that his name is now synonymous with ‘womanizer.’ 

Lucy and Harry compare the situation to “Peyton Place.” “Peyton Place” was a primetime soap opera that aired on ABC TV from 1964 to 1969.  The title has become synonymous with the personal problems and scandals of small-town life.  It was referenced several times on “The Lucy Show” when the show was  still on the air. 

As part of Lucy's scheme to reunite the Butkuses, Harry plays Dr. Gustav Glockenspiel and adopts a German accent.  Lucy says he has an advanced case of Cupidosis (ie; a broken heart).

To break Lester out of his catatonic state, Poopsie sings 'their' song, “You're Nobody Till Somebody Loves You.” This was a song Totie Fields was known for including in her act. It written by Russ Morgan, Larry Stock, and James Cavanaugh and published in 1944.  Its most famous cover was by Dean Martin in 1964.  Wayne Newton sang it in “Lucy Discovers Wayne Newton” (TLS S4;E14) and “Lucy Sells Craig To Wayne Newton” (S1;E9).  

Mr. Butkas brings Lucy a free pint of banana fudge yogurt.  In “Lucy's Lucky Day” (S4;E15) the milkman Mr. Larson tells Lucy she won a year's supply of raspberry apricot yogurt.  

Props!  The same issue of Elite Magazine seen in Lucy's hospital room is now on her living room coffee table.

Got Milk?  In two previous episodes, Lucy's milkman was named Mr. Larson from the Dover Dairy.  He was played by Billy Sands.  Now Lucy is getting deliveries from Mr. Butkus (Herbie Faye) of the Cloverleaf Dairy.  

The Chew!  There are marshmallows in Poopsie's boxes of chocolates. This is likely because marshmallows are far easier to eat on camera than chocolates.

Eye See You!  Singing her song, Fields breaks the fourth wall – first looking at the studio audience, then directly into the camera, something virtually unknown on a “Lucy” sitcom.  

“Lucy, the Other Woman” rates 4 Paper Hearts out of 5 

Like “Lucy and Joe Namath” this is one of many episodes Lucille Ball had written expressly for a specific celebrity guest star.  Since Fields made very few such appearances, it is a wonderful opportunity to see her do her thing.  She truly was a force!  Ball even allows Fields to break into song and break the fourth wall in the episode’s final moments.  Fun and funny!