#so you're not just buying your bread and milk and maybe a protein

[chuckling-chemist]

The grocery store I work at currently has Some Guy At Corporate in charge of the music we listen to and not only is it the objectively the worst playlist any of us have ever heard and keeps literally no one content, I have learned through the high schooler cashiers it plays not 1, not 2, but at least 4 songs from the Disney Channel original movies Teen Beach and Teen Beach 2.

I literally cannot fathom it. The closest I can imagine is hearing High School Musical while shopping for groceries, but from what I remember not only was High School Musical mainstream popular you also did not hear it casually in a fucking grocery store. We were not subject to Getcha Head in the Game or I Don't Dance or Stick to the Status Quo and that shit has sequels and spinoffs and the one of them went into regular theaters. And yet, somehow, this Guy At Corporate heard 4 separate songs from whatever the hell Teen Beach 2 is and went "yeah that's grocery storecore right there"

[goodluckclove]

clove, i have an intense personal problem to solve: what's for lunch? or dinner? my cooking repertoire lately has been limited to japanese food because i can have the sides all week and mains take like 10 minutes to prepare. but i feel like i need to branch out. so i pose to you a riddle (not really): what do you make when you're hungry, you have 15 minutes to cook, and roughly 1/4 teaspoon of energy with which to cook it?

See I was going to answer with some funny nonsense but this is actually a really important question. We all have to eat and we all have to eat something delicious otherwise life is significantly worse.

So like here are a few easy meals that I enjoy! I don't know the exact times because I'm usually vibing out to a podcast but I do know these all to be low effort in my eyes.

Eggy Potatoes

This is my go-to whenever I just want protein and carbs and good good flavors. It's also a major depression meal of mine and I don't usually make it for other people because it doesn't seem like a Real Meal but I made it for Riley and now it's their favorite thing for me to cook.

I take potatoes O'Brien and skillet fry them in like canola oil. Season those babies - I use garlic salt, pepper, red pepper, maybe some onion powder. Cajun seasoning or Old Bay is great if you have it. Anyways get it as crispy as you want.

From this point you can either whisk up a few eggs and add it to the cooked potatoes, or you can cook the eggs separately to your liking and add them to the top. Maybe add shredded cheese. Ketchup. Hot sauce. I'm not a cop.

Pasta Salad

This is a great way to meal prep. You can either make a bunch of pasta or buy the ready-made microwave pasta that comes in bag. Do what you have to do to get some cooked pasta. Drain and chill it in the fridge with a little bit of oil and some kind of brine (caper/olive/pepper).

Once it's chill add whatever toppings you want. Feta? Fuck yeah. Any other cheese? Sure. All sorts of veggies? Let's party. Shredded chicken/smoked salmon/cured meats? Boo-yah. Then you can dress it with either a vinegrette or like virtually any other dressing and you did it.

(those microwave pastas are fantastic for easy meals by the way. Add like olive oil and Parmesan and pepper and red pepper. Cut up some bacon or spam. Just pour like a vodka sauce over it. Yum yum.)

Charcuterie

When I can't think of what to eat I end up eating some form of charcuterie. I fucking love charcuterie.

I get three cheeses - a soft, a hard, and a medium. I like to mix my milks if I can. A spread of some kind is cool, like a mustard or a spicy jam. Maybe a seasoned butter.

Bread or crackers? I usually prefer cut bread. Like a nice Dutch Crunch. Crackers are good too though.

Also get some fruit. Cut up an apple. Carrot sticks or celery. Bam all the food groups.

I loved answering this I hope you eat something delicious.

[disagigglebilities]

You mentioned gastroparesis in a recent post.

Any tips for someone suspecting it?

(maybe gross: tw vomit)

I literally vomited up food somewhat in tact the other morning that I ate over twelve hours beforehand, and I know that's not normal. Smaller meals help greatly, and the PPI I was on made it worse. Off that one now. Sulfasalazine has also made it worse. Have to keep that one.

I've also noticed high water content meals (like soup) digest much easier.

Is there a point at which you should definitely go to the doctor about this issue? What is it?

Thank you for your time!

If you're vomiting more than once a month, it's recommended to see a doctor. Tho honestly I'd recommend going if you see a pattern too. It's always better to be safe then sorry.

I definitely understand vomiting up food hours after I ate it. It is definitely a big sign you might have gastroparesis (tho there are other reasons and sometimes gastroparesis develops because of something else and is therefore temporary).

Soup is definitely a good food to eat. Any meat or vegetable in it will be soft and tender and soft and tender means it's easier to digest. The same goes for things like noodles vs bread. Noodles will be easier to digest then bread. Liquid fruits and vegetables are easier to eat then solid.

One suggestion I'd give is limit intake of high fiber foods. Fiber is super hard to digest and sits in the stomach longer than most foods. Boiling vegetables makes them easier to digest tho tbh mine is bad enough I usually drink my vegetables (buy the expensive produce aisle stuff and drink like half a glass a day). I believe corn and I think cherries are also supposed to be avoided because they often form a bezoar in the stomach which makes it even harder to digest food.

Avoid high fat content and greasy foods. Go for fat free or 1% milk products when you can. Anything higher is harder to digest. Use margarine instead of butter. Don't eat cold pizza (I miss it smh lol). Air fry things or throw them in the oven, don't use an oil fryer.

Avoid tough meat. Chew meat thoroughly. Really, chew everything thoroughly. Lean meat is also easier to digest. I honestly probably don't get enough protein and should get those fancy protein drinks or replacement bars. Give em a try if you want.

I don't eat spicy food much but it does irritate the stomach and can make nausea worse so it's recommended you avoid it.

Also try to avoid eating skins on fruits (apples, grapes, cherries, etc). These are also tough to digest.

Listen to your stomach. If you're feeling bloated and nauseous and a meal is coming up, don't try to force regular food down. I usually eat a small serving of 1% cottage cheese and/or slow drink a breakfast essential for a meal if I need to. You can always snack later if you feel like it.

Make sure you're not eating and then going to bed immediately after. Give your body a few hours to digest it first. As someone who sometimes naps after meals, it's not fun to wake up nauseous and that's just an hour or 3 hour nap. Doing a whole night isnt a good idea. Sleeping slows digestion down even more.

Drink water after you eat. Water aids in digestion. You can still drink too much water and make things worse obviously but drinking after a meal even just a little bit often makes my stomach feel better and often will even make me feel a little less bloated if I was dumb and ate too much too fast.

Good luck with everything. Hopefully you can get some control over this issue.

[theonewhopoops]

Humans are naturally curious AND naturally impressionable learner's - so we WILL put random garbage in our mouths, but when we see someone die from eating something, or if we keep getting stomach aches when we eat those berries, we avoid the source and teach our pups the same rules.

On top of that there's situational desperation. A lot of modern humans see the world through a lense of modernity; you know what's edible; you have grocery stores provide safe options to choose from; you generally have the means to make a safe choice even if you're financially desperate (like buying only rice or lentils or pasta or bread or canned tuna or Vienna sausages, etc)

But think of the starving, dirt-poor peasant from hundreds of years ago - just in the midieval period - that CANNOT AFFORD TO LET ONE SINGLE SCRAP GO TO WASTE. There isn't a grocery store to rely on and they couldn't afford even the cheapest option anyway: "Shit, Sampson died in the middle of me making this bread and I forgot about it. But I will LITERALLY DIE OF STARVATION if I do not bake it and eat it." Bam, sour dough!

Think of the peasants from BEFORE the midieval period, who were figuring out holding onto food for a while. Mister Buwei had to travel for three weeks to get to the next town, and the food he brought along started behaving.... Strangely. But he can't buy new food until he sells some of his wares, so he has to snack on what he's got. Kablam, fermented food!!

Or the distant-times family who's captured a few wild goats and keep them around as a source of meat. They watch the baby goat nurse from its mother. "Hey maybe share some of that with MY child. Maybe I'll even take a sip. Damn that sure is full of fat and protein and my body sure does crave more." Kerplow!! Dairy products!! Oh and what's that? They milked the mother again for extra to keep on hand? Whoops, it isn't shelf stable. POWSERS, FERMENTED DAIRY

There's also Yunnan people that eat the entirety of a certain kind of banana palm. Toe to tip, they cook and eat the whole dang thing. This is in the mountains, so my guess is that the first person that ate a bite of palm probably did so because they needed SOMETHING, and you can't exactly easily travel to another village for supplies when you're in the mountains.

The history of food is so stinking interesting and I love it so much. Humans are weird, yes, but we are also creative and full of a powerful desire to keep on living no matter what. So take a bite of a dirt clump (potato) and relish in the fullness of your belly.

harvesting cinnamon

[doctorodyssey]

omg denise speaking of snacks what kind of snacks do u recommend that are super easy to make? trying to get into the whole cooking thing slowly

easy to make snacks!! good question :) i like to keep stuff in the house to make snacks that are high in protein bc i'm bad at rmring to eat...so:

controversial opinion but i love any and all snacks including tuna salad...canned tuna (SOLID WHITE, not chunk, it's a lil more expensive but much better) with mayo, garlic powder, a little bit of dijon mustard, red onion, celery. i eat this w crackers, with rice and eggs, on sandwiches, etc

rice and eggs in general is a certified perfect snack

speaking of eggs: EGG SALAD! hard boiled eggs (i usually put eggs in water, bring to a boil, then turn off the heat and let sit for 10 mins or so, then put in an ice bath). squish them up w fork and tbh all u need to add is mayo + maybe salt, and eat it on a bagel, sandwich, etc

i like chicken salad too. you can buy a rotisserie chicken or cook it yourself (if i do this i usually poach in chicken broth with lemon/garlic). shred it, add mayo, greek yogurt, lemon juice, red onion, celery, s&p, eat on sandwiches

ramen is a good snack that's easy to elevate :) i usually just cook as normal and add like half the seasoning packet, soy sauce, sesame oil, rice vinegar, garlic powder, and sriracha or sambal. then i add an egg if i'm pretty hungry

this is controversial but QUICHE CAN BE A SNACK! and it's shockingly easy. buy a premade crust, whisk like 5-6 eggs with a little cream, add some other stuff (veggies, cheese, meat, honestly most combos that sound good will work...lmk if u want ideas) and bake it on 350 til it's done (usually 30-40 mins). microwave for a minute or so to heat it up. you can make your own pie crust if you want, it's not too hard and any recipe you find online would work (i've used this in the past but they're all similar)

bfast sandwiches are a good snack. i like to keep bacon or some other protein in the house. cook an egg (however you like!), melt some cheese on top by steaming it under the pan lid for 30 secs, also cook your meat, add the egg/cheese + meat to toasted bagel/english muffin/bread/etc. i always add mayo bc im crazy. bfast burritos are the same idea! they can be meal prepped at once and frozen too :)

quesadillas :) i cannot stress this enough...GET YOUR PAN HOT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! //THEN// add vegetable/avocado/some neutral oil (not butter, the milk fat will burn quickly and it's not worth it, sorry to be controversial...ghee would work tho). if you're not sure if it's ready, flick a few water drops in...if they sizzle it's hot. put a tortilla down, add cheese (pre-shredded blend is fine!!) + garlic powder + whatever else you want. either flip one side over or add another tortilla if you want two. cook till brown then flip. if you got the pan hot enough (but not too hot! does not need to be smoking!) it'll be beautiful and crispy

nachos..layer tortilla chips with shredded cheese and refried beans (i usually add a little warm water to canned beans so they're a better consistency)....bake at 350 for like 10 mins (you just need to melt the cheese really). add salsa, guac or avocado, sour cream, onion, corn, cilantro, etc...whatever you like on nachos

[junkcereals]

Junk Cereals: Most vital ranking of 19 Cheerios flavors

Cheerios is the biggest, most popular cereal brand. General Mills has marketed four varieties for multiple generations. More recently, more than 15 flavors have been released to give fans almost anything they want. Many are still on shelves, although Peach Cheerios recently left and Cheerios Protein Almond departed last year because General Mills faced a lawsuit because it had less protein than it claimed. Following is a ranking of Cheerios flavors. The large majority are good, which forced some tough choices.

19. Apple Cinnamon Cheerios

I may have eaten Apple Cinnamon Cheerios once as a child and wanting to believe it was good enough to eat again. But my mom knew better. Evidently, this has 12 grams of sugar, which explains that and is a total waste because you wouldn't recognize all that added sugar from a bite of it. All you taste is some apple, a hard it of cinnamon, maybe some more apple. Or maybe not if you've been a smoker for any extended stretch of you're life. I never was and never will be because I satisfy my need for instant gratification with healthy stuff like cereal that has at least three grams of fiber like this stuff. By the way, this cereal has lower vitamin enrichment than some Captain Crunch varieties. Did the captain steal vitamins?

Maybe Apple Cinnamon Cheerios only resembles something I should like because its hearty, woody look and feel appeals to basic masculinity.

18. Regular Cheerios

Cheerios have been around since 1941 when they were called Cheeri Oats, but didn’t become Cheerios until General Mills decided this cereal had earned a better sounding name.

SInce then, Cheerios have been the morning staple of people who just want to get on with their day, as well as those who just want to focus on reading the newspaper rather than whatever ripples or odd spots may appear in their cereal.

Some say vanilla is their favorite ice cream flavor because anything can go in it. Cheerios is the vanilla of cereals. Consumers slice various fruits into Cheerios, such as bananas, strawberries, peaches, blueberries and mango. Avocado? Sure. Other things can go in Cheerios, like chocolate chips, yogurt, peanut butter and M&Ms. No one has yet been bold enough to make an M&M cereal, so put them in Cheerios. Before the explosion of different Cheerios flavors, Danny, who was supposed to be the main character in “Caddyshack,” poured sugar in his Cheerios. He looked like he knew what he was doing, although the plot of the movie suggested otherwise.

17. Multigrain Cheerios

A couple of things stand out about Multigrain Cheerios: its variety of colors, the sound it makes when the O's collide against each other and how it's been around this long. I guess when it came out, it competed with Total because Total was touted as the most healthy cereal ever. But General Mills pointed out that you want 100 percent DV of nine vitamins and minerals in circular form because if you want to be a Lion King, your nutrition is a circle of life.

The name certainly doesn't compel anyone, especially since no one could name the grains in it until recently when it put them on the back of the box (corn, oats, millet, sorghum and rice). Cheerios is too mature to make a game of it. By the way, all those colors in the cereal are real, none artificial. The entire Cheerios brand is consistent about that. Only lower-tier General Mills cereals get food dyes.

16. Toasted Coconut Cheerios 

This is the most Whitey McWhite Person cereal to be done. They toasted coconut to put in this. The flavor is totally coconut. Can other fruits be toasted and put into cereal form? What about mango? That would have a more pronounced taste than Toasted Coconut Cheerios. But we don't want our fruit toasted if we really want to eat it. The back of the box features vacation destinations where you may be able to eat real coconuts. But no getaway contest in which to enter. Thanks, General Mills. Please bring on Mango Cheerios and I'll forgive you.

15. Fruity Cheerios

What does Fruity Cheerios give? A general fruity flavor, real nutrition, consistent appearance and taste throughout the bowl. What does Fruity Cheerios not give? An abundance of color, tons of added sugar, a cheerful cartoon character swooping in to slap the well-being out of you. I can’t hold it against Fruity Cheerios that it displays earth tones instead of primary and secondary colors. Product developers obviously deemed Cheerios undeserving of large amounts of food dye and artificial flavors. Besides, there are fruits with earthtones like avocados. People like avocados, so they must be willing to give this a chance.

Fruity Cheerios aims to be a healthy alternative to Froot Loops, and achieves that to a moderate degree.

14. Peach Cheerios

Within this cereal, one finds a fair amount of flavor and peach puree. Like peach crayons, it doesn’t give enough color or anything else you want from peaches.

13. Chocolate Strawberry Cheerios

This limited edition of the great Cheerios franchise, which was released weeks before Valentine's Day 2021, tested how well love could be manufactured in cereal form.

The aroma upon opening the box is so romantic and lovely that a person may want to kiss the nearest person 1,000 times. Hopefully, that person is worthy of the hypnotizing scent.

This cereal possesses a wonderful chocolate flavor. However, since the strawberry aspect is an artificial flavor, it falls short of other Cheerios fruit flavors. Not that you and your partner can't swing your arm around other's in a love bite fashion as if you're eating chocolate strawberries together.

12. Cheerios Oat Crunch Oats 'n' Honey

Did you know there are oats in this cereal? You may also taste honey. The taste is quite juicy and deep, but not as beautiful as the alternative COC flavor.

11. Frosted Cheerios 

Cheerios marketers walked into the upper management suite, located the right executive office, pounded the desk (ever so politely) and said they wanted to frost their cereal. So they did with sugar oat bran and corn starch. In order to stay "simply made," as they say, they stuck to that and kept it to nine grams of sugar. The color is solid and frosting complete. Someone ran into the room and said not to let the color fade in milk, so they didn't. See how that works.

No color is lost in milk. A bit of powdered sugar taste hangs in the milk at the end.

10. Pumpkin Spice Cheerios

This is the type when you ask, it says, "I throw straight fastballs."

What else?

"I throw straight curveballs."

This pumpkin spice cereal gives you the pumpkin and the pumpkin spice, coming right at your face with what you want and need. Pumpkin puree coats the stuff while the cinnamon and nutmeg round out the flavor.

As far as pumpkin spice cereals go, it does better than some by working harder.

9. Very Berry Cheerios

This cereal looks and tastes like freckled lemonade. The bar for fruit flavor has been lowered for this in a way it wasn't for most Cheerios products. Instead of various purees, it has powders of blueberry, strawberry, cranberry and raspberry, as well as vegetable and fruit juice. I hope you get all those flavors on your buds. I got two or three. The vitamin content is reasonable because they had to get it in before all the fruit walked away from being powdered. 

But they couldn't get acai berry or pomegranate involved, which is too bad. 

8. Honey Nut Cheerios Medley Crunch

Let's say I want to have Honey Nut Cheerios and Honey Bunches of Oats in the same bowl, but don't want to put the effort into buying both. Hey, this stuff takes half the shelf space. And it has giant oat blocks. So much variety here. And no lack of honey.

7. Banana Nut Cheerios 

At first, when I found this, I thought, Oh, this like if banana Nut bread were cereal, but without the nuts, which I guess is good for some people because having nut in a cereal name is usually a lie, except for people with allergies who have to take everything very seriously because you never can say it wasn't made on the same machinery as something just because of the smell."

Actually, the ingredient list plainly says it has pecan ingredients (not just pecans).

The Cheerios brand is just walking out here informing the world it can beat all the banana-flavored cereals by laying down a bunt. Remember Nilla Banana Pudding Cereal? This stuff doesn't make you gag. Isn't that fun?

Also, it doesn't treat its fruit flavor like a serial killer. There's a reasonable proportion of banana flavor to cinnamon. Meanwhile, Apple Cinnamon Cheerios is not so even.

Apparently, Banana Nut Cheerios appeared before, but it must be better now because of technology, improved weightlifting regimens and other stuff that have generally boosted its athleticism over previous generations. 

6. Cheerios Oat Crunch Cinnamon

This cereal is gruff, but not rough. The cinnamon hits you for real, but is balanced with honey, sugar and various grain flavor so that you don't feel overwhelmed. It's also not as hard or thick as other cereals. This justifies having 40 grams of carbohydrates and 14 grams of sugar by boasting four grams of fiber. Oh, and actual flavor, unlike Multigrain Cheerios. 

This combines hardiness, taste and adventure in a way matched by few.

5. Maple Cheerios 

This was introduced at the peak of fall, just when maple harvesters started thinking about what they probably should be accomplishing  (maple season is not when you might expect, as tapping season occurs from February to April). Maple Cheerios slaps your tastebuds hard. No one has ever tasted a fuller, more saturated syrup-flavored cereal. At no point in the bowl does the flavor stop. This is complete, tasty and … healthy.

4. Honey Nut Cheerios

I have probably eaten more than 10,000 bowls of Honey Nut Cheerios in my life. Every single one was honey-smacking and vaguely nutty, leaving behind a respectable honey milk at the end (which the Bible promises in various verses to those who trust in the Lord, ostensibly meaning Honey Nut Cheerios is the cereal sent down from heaven). Honey Nut Cheerios is every bit as healthy and heart-happy as regular Cheerios, but no one ever felt beset by blandness after polishing off a bowl of Honey Nut Cheerios.

3. Blueberry Cheerios

Like other real fruit flavors of the Cheerios brand, nothing flavors this but real blueberries (and a couple other natural flavors; believe me they're so natural they'll tell you). This comes at your tongue with thick blueberry taste. Blueberry Pancake Crunch was soft on blueberry aura, while this goes hard. Blueberry Cheerios don’t give up until you give up. Also, it’s truly odiferous. If I weren’t so high on the smell, I’d use a softer adjective.

2. Peanut Butter Chocolate Cheerios

Smoothness and fullness of flavor are values to be demonstrated in a peanut butter chocolate cereal. This stuff has that, unlike Peanut Butter Chocolate Corn Pops (which is a lie, as far as any cereal can be). The chocolate flavor in Peanut Butter Chocolate Cheerios is resonant and blends well with the peanut butter flavor. The cereal goes down easy and can be enjoyed endlessly. No question, you will eat it in the bowl in the morning (but don’t detract from the flavor by pouring chocolate milk on it) and scooping handfuls in the afternoon. Both ways are equally pleasant.

1. Chocolate Cheerios

When General Mills introduced chocolate into Cheerios, it brought love into the world. Chocolate brings character to everything it touches, and it blesses this form of Cheerios in the utmost. No shortcoming in taste can be found. Afterwards, the cereal leaves a milk that is almost as fervent as actual chocolate milk. This cereal was so satisfying that I ate three-quarters of a box on a long drive.

[helianthus-hellion]

i've had a lot of instances where I can't eat much of anything and here are my go-to easy things

- peanut butter, either just plain spoonful or make a peanut butter sandwich with honey or jam. has fats and protein which is good, and you can get it salted or unsalted and creamy or plain, or almond or cashew butter if you're allergic to peanuts

- rice pilaf is nice because it comes in different flavors so it kind of feels like real food

- sliced baguette dipped in broth (my dad used to get packs of frozen steamed mussels in white wine broth and I would dip the bread in that, but you could also do just chicken stock)

- hot cereal like malt-o-meal or oatmeal

- if you drain out most of the water from a packet of ramen and add the flavoring and some peanut butter it adds some protein and flavor (works best with beef flavor)

- I like to keep some things on-hand like protein bars, cereal bars, crackers, and poptarts that I can just grab and eat, maybe see if there's anything along those lines you can eat?

- red rice and beans was one I would get after a bad day at work, if you're making it yourself you can cut out a lot of the spiciness and leave the other flavors and adjust the recipe as needed, and the beans with the rice make a complete protein

- applesauce might be easier on your stomach than fresh fruit, I know it was that way for me but maybe your stomach is pickier

- buy a pre-cooked rotisserie chicken at the store and you can either portion it out or just eat it that night, but it's really plain and you don't have to cook it yourself, and you can put it in pasta or ramen or you can eat it with the fried rice someone else mentioned up above

- cinnamon toast is a nice treat if you want something sweet but simple, cinnamon sugar sprinkled over buttered toast. I ate a lot of that during a particularly bad month.

- keeping juice on-hand might be good for boosting your blood sugar if there's any kind of juice you can drink. if you have access to it, a lot of Mexican juices are sold as fruit "nectar" and aren't nearly as acidic as most American branded juices I know of, my favorite brand is Jumex

- if bread is too dry sometimes you can also spread peanut butter and honey/jam on a tortilla and roll it up, I did that a lot as a kid

- you can make your own granola (usually just oats, a sticky sweetener like honey, and then you can add things like raisins or almonds or other dried fruit and stuff like cinnamon) and you can eat it with a non-dairy milk (almond, soy, coconut, etc. do not recommend hemp milk tho), or if yogurt is easier for you than milk (like it is for me) it's good with yogurt too

- beef jerky might be a good protein option for you, I find that really tender jerky seems to be best because it doesn't have as many textural issues for me, Jack links brand has always been good in my experience

- protein shakes might be an option, if you can find ones that are made with ingredients you can manage

- frozen fruit can be used for smoothies if you can find a cheap blender, and you can add veggies and stuff, usually for me that makes it easier to digest

sorry if any of these aren't helpful for you, they're based on my own experience but obviously that's not universal. good luck!

What’s your fave bland recipe?

So here’s the thing, I’m a two time cancer survivor and have had a lot of abdominal radiation. This unfortunately causes life long side effects that impact my digestive system. Meaning I get these attacks that can last from anywhere between a few hours and a few weeks where I literally cannot eat most things. It also comes with fun nausea that makes even the idea of cooking most things completely abhorrent. I’ve been having a lot of these attacks in the past six months. (Yes I am following up with medical professionals but that takes time.) This means I’ve been spending a lot of time living on cheap ramen, toast, bagels, and sometimes chips because bland and salty are what my messed up system can handle. 

Obviously when you’re not getting things like protein and vitamins your energy level drops and regular life things are hard to do. Like laundry, and leaving the house. So I’m trying to find some not gross, bland things I can eat that meet the following criteria:

1. Are quick and easy to make.

2. Does not contain fresh fruit or veggies. (I love’em but my tummy says no)

3. Has protein but does not require cooking, seeing, smelling, or thinking about raw meat. Eggs are hit or miss but not entirely off the table.

4. Doesn’t taste like salt and blah.

5. Does not require rare/difficult to find/expensive ingredients. 

6. Has flavor but is not spicy. 

7. Does not include both dairy (like sour cream) and mayo.

8. Small amounts of cheese and butter are okay, but lots of dairy isn’t. 

9. Does not have sea food.

10. Does not require tomatoes/tomato based sauce, or anything else acidic like citrus.

11. Does not have cauliflower, mustard, onions, beets, lots of sugar, or anything pickled.

So if you have any recipes that you think could work please let me know. I’m so damn sick of ramen…