#so you need to figure out under what conditions you will be able to (and still enjoy it and create something u like)

[smileysuh]

fuck your ex - TEASER

🌙 starring. Choi Seungcheol & Kim Mingyu x afab!Reader

🔮 preview. “Cuddles don’t hurt either,” Mingyu muses, pulling you to his chest. “If we get to your bedroom and you decide you just want someone to be with, I’m not going to pressure you. I know I said the best way to get over someone is to get under someone else, but, skin to skin contact - even if it’s not sexual - can be an amazing way to get over an ex too.”

tw/cw. Protected sex, unprotected sex, pussy eating, fingering, hand job, dry humping, grinding, foreplay, threesome, bathroom sex, using a shower head as a vibrator, multiple sex scenes, multiple reader orgasms, slight cum kink, Cheol cum’s on reader’s chest, size kink, dirty talk, praise, etc… I pet names: (hers) baby.

👹 rating.18+ explicit I wc. 7.3k 

🍭 aus. Non idol au, cop au, poly au, etc…

☀️ mlist + an. I know cops are a touchy subject, but I've had this idea for months, and I figured it's fan fiction so hopefully it's just a fun au :)

“Anyways, I bet you’re wondering about the conditions that make threesomes work,” Seungcheol sighs, returning to the topic at hand.

“I’ll admit, I’m curious. When you and Mingyu gave me your numbers, you did say I could have both of you if I wanted.”

“You still can, but I wouldn’t be shocked if you wanted to stick it with Mingyu. It wouldn’t offend me. He’s better with girls than I am.” You love how direct Seungcheol is about this, and it shows a good sense of self for him to be able to admit he’s not as much of a lady killer as his friend.

“Why do you think he’s better with girls?” you inquire.

“Most girls like that whole puppy dog thing. He’s a giver, and I respect that.”

“And you’re not a giver?” you toy, cocking a brow.

“More of a taker really,” Seungcheol admits, flashing you a grin. “If you’re interested in that sort of thing.”

“Honestly?” You let out a sigh, relaxing back against the booth. “That might be just what I need right now.”

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[starlightkun]

hi mel!!!! hope you’re doing well 🫶 i’ve been wondering about this for a while but i’m dying to know what your writing process is like. i’m trying to get more consistent at it, like sit down and Actually write (without getting distracted by my phone) and it’s so hard 😭 and i feel like you have it down to pat and i want to develop an attitude like that… like the writing itself really isn’t hard but the like. sitting down and doing it 😞 like, do you ever write on your phone? or is it just a laptop? do you sit down at a desk or just do it whenever (like on the couch or something)? idk what is it like for you? do you perchance have any tips for a poor soul… thank you!!!! 🫶🫶

omg hiii!!! i've been pretty busy n kinda burnt out w work 😔 but otherwise pretty good!! hope you've been good too!

i do most of my writing on my laptop, probably like 95% of it. when it comes to editing, i'll do it on both my phone and laptop, but actual substantive writing, it's pretty much all laptop. i am old enough that i learned to type on a computer keyboard first, not a touchscreen, and when it comes to creative prose, i prefer a computer keyboard. i also get a lot less distracted that way (too many apps and notifs and impulsive checking of apps and impulsive scrolling for hours on end on the phone. much less scrolling on the laptop).

i dont have a desk or table in my apartment that i can rlly use to work at, so i do all of my writing on my couch lmao. i usually have my phone on vibrate with the screen turned over so i have to pick it up to look at any notifs. but even then, i'm guilty of getting distracted by the phone, or even by tumblr on my laptop. if i feel like im getting too distracted, i'll turn on "focus mode" on microsoft word (if u use google docs im sure it has it's own version of this) that makes the document full screen so u can't see the taskbar at the bottom (aka you don't remember that ur other apps exist), u don't get notifs from ur laptop, etc. i'll also tuck my phone away behind my laptop screen so i can't see it. i'm very much an out-of-sight, out-of-mind person (no object permanence lmao) so those are big helps.

i've also started doing this thing where if i'm working on, say, a kun fic, i'll leave my tumblr tab open to a picture of kun before going into the word doc, so that if i'm tempted to go back to tumblr to scroll and waste time, i'll be reminded of what i'm supposed to being doing and go back to work on the fic instead. it very much gives that 'do it for her' meme but it also works surprisingly well for me.

i've talked some more about my writing process in other asks (x, x, x, x) and i have a writing tag where i post about more general writing stuff instead of specific fics!!

[chiyana]

this is the stupidest crossover possible but I want Tim to make House his doctor

yes that House

why? He needs someone who is very good, will not give up or send Tim out to a different specialist just because his medical condition is difficult, will not be overly concerned about the danger Tim puts himself in, and will lie on Tim's medical records AND to Batman/Bruce Wayne/all of the Bats without hesitation or fear.

House is and will do all of those things without hesitation. He has no shame, no boundaries, he WILL get into a public fight with Bruce Wayne if it means keeping that man out of his patient's (and House's) business. He will help Tim lie to and gaslight the rest of his family without hesitation.

in exchange, Tim is his favorite patient. Not because they get along, necessarily, Tim is a know-it-all little shit and they constantly bicker and House hates how practically every facet of Tim's existence is a lie (and Tim thinks House is a smug know-it-all jackass who is needlessly cruel and callous bc he thinks the world owes him and never delivers just bc he's in pain, news flash a lot of people are in pain and manage not to be assholes) BUT, 1, Tim brings him really interesting cases and problems, and 2, Tim NEVER lies to House about his medical conditions or what he was doing when they happened.

He lies about literally almost everything else under the sun TO everyone else, but he is 100% completely upfront and honest about his medical history and what is going on with him with House.

admittedly it takes a while for House to realize Tim ISN'T lying to him because some of the shit he says is completely insane ("the vigilante thing is pretty obvious but what do you MEAN you got the Apocalypse virus TWICE, AND SURVIVED, AS A FOURTEEN-FIFTEEN YEAR OLD")

but once he realizes Tim doesn't ever lie to him, he becomes House's favorite patient because at least TIM gives him all of the data he needs as best he's able the moment he asks. At least House doesn't have to waste his time following up on bogus information or figuring out the truth, he can just get right into the meat of the medical issue at hand.

also it's so fun to lie directly to Batman's face, know the man knows, and know he can't do anything about it

[shellofhappiness]

The general dialogue between Eric and that AOL girl regarding his philosophy on love has always stood out to me. It's one of the very few moments of vulnerability we've been given / able to find on his character over the past twenty years.

Eric always had his guard up. We all mostly know this from his own writings, no one acts like how he portrayed himself naturally. But, also including the accounts given about him from other people in his life, important or not, before and after passing. Mostly commonly described as aggressive and irritable, yet closed-off and restrained.

Alongside that online exchange, the only other times I can think of were when he called out of work to be there for his sick dog, or the innocent adoration he held toward his older brother, alongside sincere respect for his mother, of course, Reb's "I wish I were a fucking sociopath" Tape, and (arguably) his undisclosed email to his childhood best friend.

He talked about love like he was an outsider. A still figure watching it & whatever shape it may take maneuver around him, but not having the ability to engage. Let alone even acknowledge the fact it could be something of his own as well if he reached his hand out to touch it, but that wasn't even a possibility for him at that moment. Feeling comfortable enough to bring it up, but never to address it directly. Mentioning what he believed, but never outright saying it, afraid to cross a boundary. Though, he was still very careful with his wording despite not feeling confident enough to state his opinion in full. Being just general enough so he didn't risk the girl disagreeing with his words because he didn't give her an opening to do so, but still baring just a bit of his self to her through his ego because it was just the two of them.

Everyone talks about the concept of "love" relating to the case in reference to DK, because it was something that openly consumed him in private, but in a way, I feel the same just might have applied to Eric as well. But, like many other things relating to him, he hid it all away inside of himself. To live is to be vulnerable, and the times Eric was, never ended in his favor. Hence why he conditioned himself to be so isolated from everyone else, emotionally independent.

When Eric did openly talk about his doctrine on love, it was that degenerate & exploitative journal passage in which he wrote in depth about the idea of forcing himself onto certain women in his life alongside gaudy band lyrics. Considering how hesitant he was to directly speak to another girl about love, even under the context they were both being open with each other, the passage was likely written out of some kind of complex frustration. To compensate for how he felt like such a stranger in the face of it, but remarkably knowledgeable when speaking objectively. He wasn't being honest with himself, but still desperately needed some kind of liberation as an attempt to stop whatever feeling of desire he harbored from further stirring inside him.

The passion that stems from hatred is something I'm sure we all know Eric was well acquainted with. I think the hate inside of him masked the love, being overshadowed and making it appear small. It was definitely there, but seldom did it get a voice to speak in comparison to the amount of steam he let out on a general basis.

Eric cared a lot. When you look past the ego he presented to the whole world, he wasn't an individual with ASPD by any stretch of the means. He wanted not to be independent, but his life made him feel that was the only option he could truly rely on with the social instability he faced growing up. He wanted to be seen. I'm sure many people have voiced this before, but it's truly heart-wrenching to think he was doing this big finale act with his best friend, maybe because he had his best friend there to do it with him, only to find out post-mortem that DK didn't hold him to the same high regard. Maybe close, but not at all on the exact same level.

Putting the fact aside both of them expressed fantasies of doing NBK with their own respective "dream girl," DK wanted other options for someone to go through with the date, other actual people in his life, but from Eric's point-of-view, it had to be Dylan. Dylan was one of the very few people in his life, the only one still present with him, that aided his desire not to be alone. To be seen as an individual. To be vulnerable. Under the impression Dylan felt the same way he did, or at least something similar ... and while I won't deny it was there, it just wasn't as significant to the other party.

"What one person calls true love (EH) can be just another cheap thrill to another (DK)."

I'd like to specify that my goal with this post isn't to send the message that they were "gay," nor point out any form of "romantic chemistry," but rather to emphasize how languished love was overall in Eric's life. Also, I think there's an absurdist humor that comes from the irony of him saying this with what we know would follow half at his hands (you know who the other half is).

They both loved each other as friends, without a doubt, but it's so tragic to think that Eric's closest bond, a connection of love so intimate yet unrelated to direct societal romance, which created a strength so abundant that it started a ripple effect worldwide that still persists to this very day, wasn't quite requited the way he thought it was. Just like every other published bond of his, in his sad little existence.

[otaku553]

Ok so I have been stewing this crossover au in my brain nonstop for the past few days and. I am nothing if not committed to the bit, so. Volume cover redraws :)

Here are the originals:

If you want to read more about my one piece spy x family crossover, keep reading!

So the idea is simple! Crossover reincarnation au where ASL is reborn in Spy x Family. They’re each born separately and none of them are born with the same names as their previous lives, and with no way of finding each other, they each find their own thing to do in the world.

Sabo, too used to the dangers of being a spy, eventually finds a cause to devote himself to again, in preventing war from engulfing the country he was reborn in. Ace, drawn to fire as he was in his previous life, used arson as a means to rob rich people for sustenance and survival, and is eventually scouted and hired by Garden as a fire specialist and assassin. And Luffy, though born in perhaps the poorest condition, grows up happily and takes whatever part time jobs he wants to do.

The thing about Sabo is that, as much as he seems like a young man of good repute and high standing within society, everyone in WISE knows that he is a massive nuisance. Nobody knew in the beginning how a child less than half the age of most of their veteran agents could have the same skills and knowledge in their profession. Sabo was— and still is— hyper competent, and by the time WISE figured out just how much of a menace to society he was, it was too late.

Ace forgot for the first few years of his new life that he wasn’t made of fire, and consequently, received multiple accidental burns. This did not deter him, however, from growing up to be a very skilled arsonist, well-practiced in every which way to start a dumpster fire or house fire. As a teenage he would use this often to draw attention as he robbed rich people blind. When he was caught, he was given an ultimatum by Garden: join them and receive payment for starting fires and causing problems under contract, or face the government and authorities for his crimes. Begrudgingly, he joined Garden, but eventually comes to appreciate that he can make substantial money in his element.

Luffy is Luffy. No telepathy or experimentation, no fancy schools, no gimmicks or secret identities. But he has still lived an extremely colorful life in this world, full of fascinating and kind individuals who have helped him grow up healthy and relatively happy. He goes where he is free, and he takes whatever part time jobs he wants in order to make the minimum he needs to survive.

Ace and Sabo find each other first, in their late teens, and neither of them realize that the other remembers their previous life, but both refuse to separate. (Sabo thinks Ace doesn’t remember, because Ace didn’t recognize him. Ace never saw Sabo grow up past 10, however, so he doesn’t recognize older Sabo immediately. By the time he does realize who exactly Sabo is, Sabo has backtracked and pretends to know Ace from a dream, or from somewhere else.)

Sabo’s attachment to Ace, predictably, causes problems between Sabo and WISE, but by then, Sabo is indispensable to the organization, and they make an exception for Sabo to be able to remain with Ace, so long as Ace never finds out what Sabo’s actual job is. Ace, on the other hand, hides his job because he doesn’t want his brother, who he has just found and who does not know Ace well enough yet, to know that he makes a living from killing people.

And they find Luffy sometime afterwards, prior to the beginning of the Spy x Family canon. Luffy figures out, not long after moving in with his brothers, both of his brothers’ secret occupations and the fact that both of them remember their past memories. He thinks it is common knowledge, however, and so he never brings it up.

[loveydovey-leviathan]

"𝑩𝑨𝑩𝒀, 𝑰'𝑴 𝒀𝑶𝑼𝑹𝑺!"

streamer! leviathan x gn! reader

summary: levi starts a stream right after you put lipstick on

cw: one mention of being eaten, he’s obsessed w/ you what can i say, ooc levi, also im 90% sure this should be tagged yandere lol

🍉 from the river to the sea, Palestine will be free 🇵🇸. this account stands with Palestine, and so— i require everyone who interacts to educate themselves, and/or support/donate. READ THESE; 1 and 2, HELP HERE, BOYCOTT. | credit 🍉

.

The embodiment of envy itself sits pretty on his gaming chair, looking up at you and following your movements in a daze. He doesn’t think he has the capacity to do anything right now, let alone start his weekly stream. His entire face is flushed with the cutest pink hue because of all the blood rushing to his face at your affections and every languid kiss you give turns him more and more into the demonification of jelly, but he thinks being eaten by you would be the best way to die. He’d be connected to you in a way no one else would, always with you forever and ever–

“Levi?”

He yelps in the most embarrassing way possible and he immediately wants to crawl down to the Underground Tombs so he would never have to see anyone again, but then you laugh and he realises he wouldn’t be able to see or hear or touch you if he did that. The thought of it makes his very skin melt, or maybe his face just hasn’t calmed down yet.

“Y-Yeah?”

Your smile is teasing, predatory even. Like you know something he doesn’t and you’re going to enjoy every moment of his ignorance. 

“You have a stream to start, don’t you?”

He nods, and your smile grows wider. You give him one last kiss– it’s longer than the others but shorter than he’d like, and he whines when your fingers lightly scratch his nape in the way you know makes him go insane for more of you. It’s over before he has the chance to beg and he sends a longing look your way as you make yourself comfortable in the spot you’ve claimed as yours in his room. Just out of sight from his camera but close enough that he doesn’t have to move much to see you’re still there when he gets nervous.

He takes a few breaths to try and calm himself down and get his head in the game, but thoughts of you linger nonetheless, like a part of you had permanently embedded yourself into his very being. Levi figures this condition is the best he can get before he’s really late, so he starts the stream as he is.

He doesn’t notice anything different at first, but he’s too focused on making it look like everything is normal and that he isn’t still obsessing over you to notice what his chat is saying. He plays through the game he’s chosen as usual for a good while, becoming invested in the gameplay before he finally has a chance to rest in-game. It’s only now that he realises he hasn’t looked at the live chat since he started, and what he sees makes him want to pass out.

@/lover-b0y: LMAOO HE STILL HASN’T NOTICED

@/sweeti3s: you need to check the mirror before you start your stream my guy 😭

@/crystal-empire: do you think he did this on purpose?

@/loneeerrrr: way to make me feel single 😥😥

Levi immediately ducks under the desk in a frenzy and pulls out his rarely-used camera app, and what he sees can’t possibly be him. His entire face is covered in lipstick marks– from his cheeks to his nose to his eyes– but it’s especially bad on his lips. It’s smeared like crazy and it’s glaringly obvious to anyone who looks at him that he just had a make-out session. 

He sits under his table as he struggles to figure out what to do– brain going a mile a minute but still getting nowhere. But then he feels you staring and he looks up to see you sitting right next to him with your head lowered to not hit yourself against the desk.

His mind struggles to register anything but you. You’re with him and you’re so close he can smell the very essence of you. He’s envious of the very clothes on your back, of your lungs and your ribs and your intestines because why doesn’t he get to be that close to you?

“I turned off your stream.”

Your voice tunes out everything for him, but he musters up a “thank you…” in response.

You look empathetic when you apologise. “I’m sorry, was that too much for you?”

It was too much but not enough at the same time. He wishes you hadn’t pulled this stunt but he’s ecstatic that you did. He wishes you kissed him on stream, he hopes you leave a mark every time he goes out but he also wants to keep this side of you to himself. Why should anyone else get to see the affection you’ve given him? It’s his and his alone but the other part sees this as you claiming him as yours, and it’s a title he wants everyone to know.

“Levi, you okay?”

“Will you kiss me?” he blurts out.

It doesn’t matter how many times he asks, but you always respond with a smile too soft for someone like him. It melts every barrier he could ever put up and he welcomes everything you do to him with open arms, but all he feels is lips so perfectly moulded to fit against his own that he knows you’re the only one he’ll ever want so carnally.

[strwberri-milk]

hii !! i really like ur works and writings, can i request for the LAD boys with a reader who has a hard time sleeping? thankuu💗💗

oh you mean ME - hopefully these turn out well bc theyre all based off my own experiences :(( i def agree that 1) resting w your eyes closed is better than nothing and 2) i would sleep so much better if i was sitting in rafayels studio as he worked but for now his tender moments shall have to suffice

Xavier unfortunately does not share your struggle at all :(. He very easily falls asleep so his main issue is just staying awake. However, when you tell him that you're struggling to fall asleep he decides to do things that make him extra sleepy for you.

He'll change the temperature of his apartment to be more comfortable for you, dropping it a few degrees so you could cuddle with him easier under the sheets. He also has lots of comfortable clothes for you to wear when you sleep, holding you close to him as he softly speaks to you.

The conversation doesn't really mean anything - it's more just like white noise that you can tune out to to try and focus on something that's not your inability to sleep. He's there with you every step of the way, doing his best to wait until you fall asleep to go to bed himself.

Zayne reminds you that even if you can't sleep simply just resting with your eyes closed is much better than nothing. He'll make sure your sleep hygiene is also top notch, reminding you to stay away from your bed and that you're doing work or mindless scrolling away from your bedroom.

He'll also encourage you to keep busy during the day - the more you move the more tired you'll get, hopefully. He isn't going to make your day center around going to bed but he is going to do his best to help you.

When night comes he'll be there however you want him. He'll hold you close or talk at you until you finally manage to sleep, whatever it is. He's not going to want you to go right to medication but he might grab some things over the counter and help you find your best fit if that's something that you need.

Rafayel is ASMR extraordinaire. When you tell him that you can't sleep he isn't really sure what to do other than make bedtime as appealing to you as he physically can.

One night when you can't sleep you decide to hunt him down, knowing that he was going through another bout of no sleep thanks to his artwork. You stumble into his studio drowsily, wiping your eyes. He's immediately at your side, the soft music playing paired with his gentle touch as he leads you to a seat he bought specifically for you to be able to watch him as he works.

You watch him for a bit but the quiet music with his brushes against the canvas knocks you the fuck out, falling asleep shortly thereafter. He won't notice for a few hours, just thinking you were watching him paint but once he's figured out you've fully fallen asleep he'll put you back in bed. You've accidentally conditioned yourself to fall asleep at the sound of painting though which is both good and bad.

[saerins]

PREV: #005 THE ICE SURRENDERS 𖧧 #006: COMFORT IN FAMILIARITY 𖧧 NEXT: #007 TWO STUBBORN ꒰ series masterlist ꒱

꒰ঌꨄ︎໒꒱ — there’s a lot going on in life. there’s a lot expected of you. both of you. sometimes love is all it takes. and sometimes, love is not enough.

content: itoshi sae x female reader. smut/fluff/angst. tw: making out, dry humping, oral (male receiving), profanity, they tiptoe around their awkwardness, lots of being needy, clingy, sae’s a little shameless & so are you. word count: 7.5k

༝༚༝༚ it’s finally here !! the next chapter haha to whoever’s still reading & waiting for this , thank you for still being here :’) i appreciate you more than you’ll ever know <3 also yay !! finally you’ll find out whether sae & bianca fucked :p (psa about taglist at the end of the chapter !!)

there’s something very foreign about waking up in peace. very foreign, but very welcome. 

sunlight filters nicely through the half-closed blinds of the guest room. the paint on the walls don’t chip, don’t leave anything for you to stare at, can’t wonder whether the paint job would come undone first before you.

the bed is soft. doesn’t have those annoying noises the springs make when you get up and stretch. the room is cold from the air conditioning, but the slight warmth of the sun that bounces on your skin is a nice contrast.

you feel light.

the events of last night leave much to your imagination. you have no idea if last night was too much, if asking for a kiss was too much.

but sae kissed you himself—it shouldn’t be, right?

you find you never quite know with him. you really should get out there and deal with it.

it’s 7am but something tells you sae should already be up. he’s a soccer player with a tendency to make the best of his days, there’s no way he’s not up and ready yet.

true to your guess, by the time you awkwardly peek into the living room, there’s a note waiting for you on the coffee table.

got a photoshoot till night, help yourself to anything in the house.

his penmanship leaves much to be desired, unlike the other parts of him. an indication of how little he actually writes.

sae could’ve just texted you this, but you guess even he’s feeling at a loss after last night.

which both of you think must be stupid; it’s just a kiss.

work is already settled for you. sumi offered to help you speak to mr tatsuji. the interview with sae early on really does work miracles. it’s so easy to curry favours now.

a three-day break from work because sumi thought you might need more time off so she conveniently told your boss that you’re nursing a fever.

where do you find friends like her at work nowadays?

you plop yourself down on sae’s leather couch, rife with the kind of comfort that’s alien to you. you definitely owe sumi one. sae, too. 

you’ll figure out ways to repay sumi soon. there has to be someone else on the team that you can convince for an interview under her name. you’re already calculating possibilities between oliver aiku and shuto sendou.

but as for sae, you find yourself drawing a blank.

what can you do for someone who already has everything? what kind of benefits can you extend?

you’re feeling even worse as the clock continues to tick, realising that you’d probably never be able to measure up to someone like him.

your feet carry you to the balcony before you know it, the chilly morning air hitting your face like the wake up call you need.

sae’s not really like anyone else you’ve known before. he’s a normal, sane-enough human—nearly the polar opposite of how eita is, though, so maybe that’s why your head’s devoid of ideas.

you groan, elbows perched on the wooden railing lining the edges of the balcony, palms pressed against your cheekbones as you desperately try to manifest an idea in your head.

he can lend you his shirt. he can extend a space in his house. he can give you that kiss he remembers you wanted.

but you can’t think of one measly idea of what to do for him in return.

you can think of one idea of how to get there, to get your answer, but you can’t shake the notion that it’s kind of stupid and kind of shameless. 

you juggle the degree to which each attribute bothers you and ultimately decide to just go ahead with it anyway.

“what is it, idiot?”

eita’s as friendly as always, on the other side of the line, voice a low rasp, obviously stirred from a deep sleep.

“can i ask you for your opinions?”

a sigh from the other line, as if he expects something completely stupid.

“yeah, sure.”

“and promise not to lecture me!”

eita pauses. you hear rustling on his end, probably getting up because he’s gotten curious and invested in the conversation now.

“depends, what the fuck did you do?”

he acts as if you’re the only one out of the two of you that does stupid, stupid things.

“nothing stupid, thank you very much.” (yet. possibly.) “but… do you have any idea what sae likes?”

it’s a long shot. a really long one. eita would probably have a better chance at guessing an AV star’s favourite dish. wouldn’t hurt to try, though.

eita makes a loud, confused noise. warranted.

you think.

“uh… i don’t know, bianca?”

a pause.

“i’m joking.”

it still hit your sore spot. the nagging reminder that there’s more to sae and bianca than meets the eye that just gets sprung back into the forefront of your temporal lobe.

“well, i’m serious!” you choose to ignore it.

another sigh from eita. you can practically envision him on his bed, duvet carelessly discarded to the side, scratching the back of his head.

“look, all i know is that he hates french fries and loves his routines, and oh, the only girl he’s ever admitted liking is momoko sakura.”

eita says it all in one breath and waits for your response like you’re supposed to appreciate it. the last one nearly made you vomit before you realise it’s a fucking tv show.

if you’re going to get help, you’re not going to get it from him.

“oh, he’s more of an ass guy than a boob guy, if you need to know.”

“what? eita!”

“i’m serious.”

you don’t really know whether you can trust him. even if you do, what the heck are you supposed to do with that information? jiggle your ass randomly in front of itoshi sae?

“thanks, eita.” you’re evidently bummed out. that doesn’t cancel out your actual gratitude that eita didn’t just hang up on you. you consider it a big enough surprise that he even tried.

“wait, why do you ask?”

his voice comes out all rushed, like he’s just now waking up and realising it’s not like you to ask him something like this out of the blue.

it’s probably not the greatest idea to tell him where you are and why you’re there, but you don’t actually like lying to your friends so you cough up the information without much persuasion.

“so what, are you guys a thing now?”

it’s fair of him to ask. you conveniently left out the kiss though, so maybe eita’s jumping the gun here.

“no, we’re just… getting to know each other.”

“uh huh.”

it sounds almost accusatory.

suddenly you don’t know what to say to the one you’re always talking around.

“well, if you need me, call me,” he says, more laconic than you’re used to. still, all things considered, you guess you can’t really blame him.

the discontent in his voice is apparent, the lack of intonation eating you up with guilt.

you retreat back into the living room, into the warm embrace of the single-seater, hoping that the softness of it would swallow the tornado in you up whole.

the rest of the morning is spent on your phone and laptop, between brainstorming ideas on what you can do for sae and replying to any of your colleagues who have no respect for the aspect of a time off.

after eventually deciding that nothing you think of can actually be good enough, you settle for just asking him straight.

yes, you’ll ask him later when he’s back and just be straight up with him about it. that way, you won’t waste your efforts on something vapid and sae would actually like it.

come afternoon, you dare yourself to fish out another shirt from his closet because you opened his fridge only to find absolutely nothing inside but a few bottles of salted kombucha. (which is absolutely not a qualifying substitute for lunch.)

it also won’t do for you to be wearing sae’s national jersey out to the supermarket and bringing more attention to yourself than necessary, so you tiptoe into his room even though he’s not there, in pursuit of a completely plain (or at least a more vague) t-shirt.

freely traversing his apartment like this makes you feel more than what you are, but you shake that thought away.

and there you were thinking eita was the one jumping the gun.

by the time the sun gives way to the moon and sae trudges his way back home—with a small spring in his steps that he can’t ignore—he walks into the apartment, reminding himself to say he’s home in the process.

it’s his first time coming back home to an apartment that’s not empty. it’s not something he thought he’d want to get used to. but knowing who’s on the other side of the door, he thinks it might be nice.

“hey, you’re back!”

there’s the usual uplifting lilt in your voice that he can’t ignore, can’t forget.

the sound of bounding footsteps that he can usually hear from the other apartments are infuriating but the ones that come from you makes his heart beat just a little bit quicker.

“hey,” he greets, the dull of his voice nearly being betrayed by the light in his eyes.

three seconds and you’re right in front of him, peering at him with inquisitive eyes. you do that cute head-tilt thing you always do when you have questions.

“what’s that?”

you point your finger in the direction of his neck, and he cranes his head toward the mirror hung on the corridor to see what you mean.

a big red lipstick stain on the side of his neck. or mauve, as the makeup artist calls it.

sae sighs to himself. so that’s what his assistant meant when she tried to call him back saying they’re not done with him yet.

“are you too eager to go home or something?”

that’s what she asked when he ignored them and left the set the moment everything was over.

“oh, uh, photoshoot.”

it’s always simple, his answers. what’s not simple are bianca’s natural reactions. he can just envision her face if she was in your position instead; the slight twitch in the corner of her lips, the pout that comes after to mask her disdain, the questioning to come.

that’s why it’s a built-in reaction for sae to elaborate.

“it was—”

“i see.”

you both speak at the same time. sae doesn’t know what to think.

the slight confusion on your face is represented by the raise of your brows, before it quickly gets replaced by a giggle, and then your fingers find the box of tissues and hand one to him.

“wanna wipe it off?” you ask. a simple question that makes him question a lot, actually.

only because he’s been conditioned to think all girls are a carbon copy of bianca behaviour-wise and you just happen to prove otherwise.

“oh! or did you want to wash up first?”

how long has he been standing there idly again?

sae just blinks as he stands in his doorway, stupid and dazed. he gets his bearings a few seconds later when you do that cute head-tilt thing in the other direction. he can’t stand seeing anymore of it or he’ll get an untimely reminder of how you tasted last night.

“yeah, i’ll go wash up, we can eat after.”

he still takes a piece of tissue without using it. he assumes you haven’t eaten dinner and only remembers he probably should ask first but he’s already closing his bedroom door behind him, his person of interest on the other side.

this idle state of confusion, of questioning his every move and every word; it’s not an experience he’s ever had before and he thinks it isn’t very pleasant.

on the field he never has doubts. always plan after plan, carefully crafted by the milliseconds. when something doesn’t work, he tries another. dribbles it past the troublesome one, pass it to one of his forwards. the one that can score.

it’s easy on the field.

easier than it is in front of you.

it still proves the same when he gets out of the showers, mind refreshed and vitality rejuvenated, only to come face to face with home-cooked dinner.

foreign, all alien, very welcome.

you’re rambling on about the three dishes you made and how you’re not sure if he’d like it. sae’s all in his head trying to think of excuses so that you can keep staying here.

for someone who’s spent most of his adulthood keeping people at arms’ length, your presence in his life now is half-exciting, half-concerning.

if he’s heard correctly from his assistant who nags him constantly about a possible budding love life at the height of his career, it’s how people get screwed over. how their plays get fucked up.

if she’s any reliable.

sae used to think he wouldn’t let anything come in the way of him and his career, because his career’s the only relationship he ever thought of having. until now. until you’re sitting on the side of the dining table that used to always be empty because he refuses to let anyone in.

until your smile paints the dull bland walls with colour for once and your food tastes unsettlingly like home. the kind of home he hasn’t visited in a while. the kind where it’s out of sight, out of mind that people don’t realise what they miss.

“how is it?”

you’re grimacing, like you’re expecting something bad. as if sae’s some sort of food critic. as if sae’s ever been anything but subjectively nicer to you.

“it’s not bad.”

really, he has nothing to compare it to. the last time he ever had home-cooked food was probably before he even started playing soccer. everything’s a blur when he tries to recall it, just the vague imagery of him and rin side by side with their legs dangling in the air of the high stools while their mother plates all the food he didn’t bother to memorise when he was, what, six?

he wonders if his brother remembers anything.

it’s enough strain on his mind that he’s finding this type of humdrum fascinating, when it’s with you. it doesn’t help that your hips brush when both of you wash the dishes together.

sae doesn’t really know what he’s doing and he only now realises that you went out earlier and got the groceries. he hasn’t thanked you yet, has he? should he?

everyday courtesy is lost on him.

it’s only after the dishes are washed and the countertops are wiped down that sae thinks maybe he should just express his gratitude.

“tha—”

“thank you, by the way.”

the both of you really need to stop saying shit at the same time.

you got it out first. sae’s such a loser. sae lets you continue.

“i know i’m imposing on you a lot, but…” your words get lost on you, and sae can sense the lack of explanation on your circumstances is a choice.

he wants to know you. there’s a stinging irritation in the back of his head knowing that otoya knows you better than he does.

it’s selfish. he knows. but sae’s always been selfish. in a sense.

“you can stay here as long as you need.”

it’s just sae’s pathetic attempt to ride on what you’re saying, to hopefully keep you here a little longer because somehow the walls don’t seem to suffocate when he comes back to you. the air seems clearer and the house becomes more like home, if he dares to say he knows anything of what that’s like.

he tries to gauge your reaction, trying not to crane his neck too far to the side to make it so obvious that he’s staring.

you’re comfortably perched on the couch, right next to him. there’s an annoyingly small gap in between you. he nearly misses the contact. your feet are on the cushion, hugged close to your chest, your eyes gazing at the little space of nothing between the air in front of you and his coffee table.

normally, he’d think that if someone extends an offer that they know you’d like, it’ll be taken without question. so he wonders why you still need to think.

his first guess is that you have a penchant need to not owe anyone anything.

his mind strays to how good you look in his other shirt. whenever you happened to take it. he’ll probably give you his entire closet if you ask for it.

half exciting, half concerning.

“thank you.” but you hesitate. you’re not looking at him yet. sae takes full advantage of that to look at you. at every smidge of movement in the muscles of your face. how your brows furrow half-heartedly, how your lips are pressed into a firm line.

he really wants to see your lips. want to taste them again. even if it means he has to go to bed and groan into the pillow instead of your mouth.

you give him what he wants when you start to speak again.

“is there anything i can do to repay you?”

there’s really no need.

sae shakes his head. “it’s fine, you don’t need to do anything.”

there’s a crease between your brow bones that beg to differ.

“no, really, i mean it. is there anything you need? anything you want me to do?”

there’s a really long, awkward pause as sae struggles to process your simple question. his adam’s apple bobs up and down. the walls and his glass windows start their suffocation game once more.

sae’s not sure you want him to tell you what he wants. he’s a visual thinker; and his mind isn’t anywhere but in the gutter.

between having a long day doing a photoshoot that doesn’t even interest him and having a female model as his partner when he keeps comparing her to you, sae can’t really keep it together after more than twenty years of keeping to himself.

he already has one of the couch pillows on his lap, just in case.

it’s already coming in handy thanks to what he’s thinking about.

sae shakes his head. “really, it’s fine.”

he’s half praying that you’ll just let it go so he can go back into the confines of his own room, feeling guilty that he’ll have to help himself to the thought of you but soothing his frustrations anyway.

the other half of him is praying for just you.

and that’s the part that’s alarming to him.

he nearly loses it when you shift, your elbow resting against the back of the couch, body turned to face him as if he hasn’t had a good enough look in his imagination that you have to bring it in real life.

yeah, he’s blaming you. because his brain’s short-circuiting and his synapses are failing him and he can’t seem to get his fucking eyes off of your lips.

he feels nearly shameless for staring at you point blank.

sae doesn’t know what expression you’re wearing now. he’s not sure he wants to know. are you offended or do you feel the same way you felt last night?

feelings can change like the season. or so he’s heard.

your voice is murmured; his thoughts are in the foreground. you say something along the lines of “what do you want, sae?” and he doesn’t have any of the carefully constructed self-control he’s had over the past few years.

so easily undone just by your mere presence.

“you.”

sae says that without thinking. it’s a chore, thinking. he keeps bouncing between shoulds and should-nots and it’s really fucking irritating.

“kiss me,” he tells you, more outright.

if you can tell him such a thing, you won’t punish him for saying the same, right?

here’s the spoiler: you don’t.

another spoiler: you feel like you’ve been waiting for him to tell you that all night.

barely a second into his request and you’re already fulfilling it. sae’s hand curves behind your neck, his calloused palm delicately placed on your skin. the other hand that’s free decides to pull you in, make it so you’re straddling him.

fuck, when did he get rid of the pillow?

your groan is enough indication that you feel him under you. the way he’s so stiff right now is nearly painful, only because the need it feels him with surpasses any sort of need he’s ever had.

both of you are half kisses and half pants. sae has no choice but to tip his head backwards as you roll your hips against his.

“shit,” he hisses, the hand on your neck crawling upwards to grab a fistful of your hair and tug it downwards. it doesn’t affect your hips in the least. why would it?

his other hand grips onto your waist, like he has to do that to make sure you stay there, make sure you keep moving against him. his eyes practically roll into his head, the sounds he’s so shamelessly making betraying any sort of stoic that he used to have in front of you.

a soft chuckle escapes you, and he pries his eyes open just to stare. the tilt of your face, the way your eyelashes brush against each other, that bite of your bottom lip—you’re a delicacy wrapped in his dreams.

“you’ve been thinking of this, huh?”

there’s a blush on his cheeks that he doesn’t let you see, releasing your hair and immediately letting his lips land on your neck. 

it feels nice to make you sound as undone, as needy as he is.

your chest pressed against him doesn’t do much to ease the tightening in his sweatpants. you still haven’t stopped rolling your hips.

right now it looks as if you’re the one with the better stamina.

his teeth latches onto your neck, head bowed, leaving a mark while you have to tell him to ease up a little on it. he’s learning.

he tries again.

better this time, from your lack of feedback.

“i hate what you do to me.” he sounds so stupid, so lost. it’s the vulnerability that’s annoying.

you try to catch your breath as he leans back against the backrest, both of you a bundle of nerves all out in the open. his hair’s mussed, but so is yours. sae’s still hard as fuck, a wet spot already formed on his regrettably light grey sweatpants.

maybe it’s your instinct that tells you to ask him your next question.

“have you ever done this before?”

you fail to clarify what this is, but if sae’s adept enough, you mean making out, and whatever else could happen after. humping. blowjobs. sex.

they’re all the same to sae either way.

“no, never.”

he’s still breathless.

you were halfway to catching your breath, but his admittal takes another pocket of air out of your lungs.

to sae, the silence that follows is painfully awkward. he’s good at guessing what players think on the field, but he’s an absolute goon at trying to guess what the girl he’s interested in is thinking when he just basically admitted he’s a virgin in all romantic aspects.

the only person that came close was bianca. and even then all they did was kiss.

this is the first time he’s ever wanted more.

“i don’t,” he pauses, his eyes momentarily fluttering shut as he thinks of ways to express this animal need to have you. “i don’t want you to repay me with anything.”

you settle your forehead on his, your fingers playing with the hem of his shirt. your breathing’s even. it helps him even his out too.

“but if you ask me what i want.” sae takes his time to shift his gaze towards you. your lips, your eyes. you’re so pretty it should be an insult to everyone else. “i want you to be my first.”

it sounds so fucking corny that a small part of him is shrivelling inside. it can’t believe he said something like that. he would’ve cringed if he heard it in movie theatres.

see how pathetic you make him feel?

“your first… what?”

he wants to chuckle. he knows you know. you’re probably being a little shit by asking him to admit it. but even so, he’ll give in to you.

because it feels right.

“everything.”

it could be that you don’t know what to say. it could be that you’re too eager. sae wouldn’t know.

but the way you kiss him next, the way you guide his hands under your shirt (it may as well be yours now), it knocks all wind out of his lungs, all the sense out of his brain.

for the first time, sae finds his hands on your bare chest. it makes a noise come out of him, one that’s equally greedy and needy. he gives it a squeeze, make sure you pay him one back.

your lips are on his lips but by now you’re barely kissing, more open panting and desperate hands pawing at each other.

he takes your nipple between his fingers, giving it a light pinch. your back arches, a sinful sight in front of him, one that he’ll probably have to use for a while if you’re not around.

how can one person have this much control over his desires? that’s a foul.

your hips resume their rolling just for a little bit only for them to stop when you pull back. your hand is on his chest, lips shiny from being subject to his mouth. sae already wants to touch you some more, both his hands relegated to his sides.

“i wanna suck you off.”

you say that so casually that sae’s doing the blushing for you.

if it’s even possible, he gets even harder, and you take the twitching you see as a yes.

you get on your knees in front of him, sat in the spot between his legs, knees folded against the cold floor. sae grabs your wrist before you can pull his pants down, committing himself entirely to the moment.

“take your shirt off first.”

yeah, that request—demand?—shouldn’t roll so easily off his tongue. yet here he is, letting it. the wet patch on his pants is shameful enough. what else does he have to lose?

he finds it near endearing that you don’t hesitate to pull his shirt off over your shoulder. sae’s eyes drag shamelessly over your breasts as he takes in the view. he nearly fails to stop himself from telling you to suck his dick already because it’s getting harder to ignore the wanton need it has for you.

nothing else has to be said.

you divest him of his sweatpants, his cock hitting his shirt as it springs free, near the spot around his bellybutton, the wet patch spreading on his old jersey. you’re looking at his cock, then looking at him, then back at his length—it makes him nervous.

the moment you wrap your fingers around the base of his shaft, he sucks in a sharp breath, head tilted towards the ceiling. it’s different than when he touches himself.

your fingers are smaller, more delicate than his. it feels good. feels even better when you give his tip a little kitten lick, and he’s almost sure you’re just experimenting now, just checking how he’s reacting to every single gesture.

sae’s doing everything in his goddamn power to keep it all together.

he can’t even look at you. that’s a sure fire way to end everything the moment he does.

a strained groan leaves the back of his throat as you pump his cock painfully slow. he doesn’t know if this is the norm. if it is, he hates it.

then comes what he’s been imagining: your tongue flat on his length, licking a stripe up his cock, your hand around it pumping a little bit quicker, still as gentle.

“shit, that feels good,” he finds himself admitting without much thought.

is he supposed to have any thoughts when you’re blowing him so impossibly good like this?

you don’t say much, and you can’t, not when your mouth slowly wraps around his cock and his tip starts hitting the back of your throat. your rhythm is steady at first, like it’s a tease, like it’s just a hell of an opening act.

sae’s hips start to buck upwards into your mouth, and you take it expertly. he dares himself to look at you when you start moaning around his cock, the sight of you so saccharine, so indulgent.

and then yep, there it is, the way his self control gets shredded into pieces, in the form of thick white ropes of cum in your mouth as he groans in resignation.

his eyes are still on you, this time he doesn’t want to look away anymore. he watches you as you swallow his cum, licking his tip just to watch him shudder in pleasure as he gets subjected to the slight over sensitivity.

your breasts still look beautiful. he still wants to play with them.

sae finds that maybe his courage got lost with his cum. it takes everything in him to pull you up onto the couch, this time back in your original position next to him. he kisses you, a blatant disregard for tasting himself on your tongue.

it catches you by surprise, he can tell. if the little squeal in your throat is any indication.

“i’m starting to feel like we’re in one of those landlord-tenant situations.” you’re probably joking. just like you always like to when there’s an awkward silence.

sae doesn’t really feel awkward though. so maybe this is something else.

“well, i mean, if that’s what you’re into.”

you playfully shove him away, rolling your eyes as you tug his shirt back on over yourself. a smirk finds its way onto your face.

“you’re still horny?” a rhetorical question. it’s only asked because sae’s still hard.

his walls are wider than it’s ever felt. than it’s ever been. than it’s ever allowed to be.

sae pulls his pants back on, eyes on you as you take mini steps towards his side of the apartment.

“what do you expect when that’s the best i’ve felt in my life?”

you stifle a laugh when even with his pants on, his tent is still so obvious.

you must be feeling a little bold, because you open up his bedroom door by yourself, giving him a look that he can only equate to come hither.

oddly, he doesn’t feel any sense of shame when his feet carry him to you. when his hands tug you into his room, when your feet tumble against one another’s and you end up on top of him on the bed.

he feels no shame letting you blow him again. he feels no shame letting you swallow all of him for the second time tonight.

there’s only a split second of bashfulness when he asks you to sleep with him. in the literal sense.

but you don’t see anything wrong with it. you don’t say anything. you don’t agree, you don’t reject. you only give a weak laugh as you lay beside him, his hair messed up to fuck and laying there questioning where all his stamina went.

you fall asleep within seconds, just laying there on your side of the bed.

sae takes one more chance at being shameless, wrapping his arm around your torso, letting himself fall asleep.

sae’s a winner.

he has a track record of all wins in all matches. he’s excellent at what he does. the calm and composed one. the one who has his shit together.

but right now he feels like a total loser.

sae brisks out of his bedroom, wondering if you treated him like a one night stand. even if he didn’t stick it inside you. even if he barely got a chance to help you.

jumping the gun, maybe, but he’s already thinking of ways to convince you that it doesn’t have to mean anything if you don’t want it to.

his brisk walk turns slow when he realises you’re just washing up in the guest toilet, an embarrassment hanging over his head at his slight overreaction.

when you waltz out of the bathroom, sae’s quick to act normal. can’t let you see any of his shortcomings just yet.

you spend yet another day at his apartment. this time, sae’s right there with you. doesn’t have to conform to any schedules, doesn’t have to wish the girl he’s spending time with is you.

because it is you.

turns out you also want to get to know him.

you open the windows and try meditating with him. the morning yoga comes right after.

“you really do this every morning?” you ask him while your body tries to adjust to the downward dog.

sae tries not to laugh.

“mhm.”

he runs slower than his usual speed later in the park. doesn’t want you to quit on him before you’ve even begun. you can only make it half his usual route and he acts like it’s normal, tells you you’re already very good.

sae squeezes in questions whenever he can.

slowly, at first. stuff pertaining to you and otoya’s friendship. stuff like university and middle school and how you slapped otoya he nearly quit being your friend.

you’re an open book when it comes to friendship.

you admit what you had with otoya was just physical, admit that you’ve never tried anything more, that it was a stupid phase and he’s really just a friend.

sometimes sae can’t help but wonder whether you’re trying to convince him or yourself.

he starts to ask about stuff you like when you’re preparing lunch together. he learns a little more about you the same time he’s learning how to chop vegetables right.

it’s harder than he thought.

both of it.

you used to like baking. you made some money with it. you love the smell of home cooked food and you’ve always wanted to try that bar you’ve heard about that serves killer sushi and is housed at the top of a skyscraper.

by the time sunset hits and the river that’s sold as part of his apartment’s view starts shimmering with the orange hue, he touches on the topic of your family.

that one, you’re not so keen about.

sae can tell from the drop of your smile and the light fading from your eyes. he tries to ignore it but he’s curious. aren’t they fundamentally who made you what you are?

he can’t help himself.

between the silences, all either of you can think about is what is this thing, between the two of you? but neither of you have the balls to ask.

the day is almost perfect.

sae doesn’t feel like he is who he always thought he was. he doesn’t feel like the revered soccer player that nearly everyone knows. he doesn’t feel like he has any larger-than-life obligations.

if this is what a normal day feels like between normal people, then he thinks maybe this is what he wants. the feel of you by his side, doing things together or even just existing.

there’s a calm you bring that he can’t find in anyone or anything else.

it’s different than the kind of serenity playing soccer gives him, but it makes him addicted all the same. his mind chants the same mantra the whole time—he wants you. just you. only you.

dinner’s ready and sae’s hungry. your stomach’s growling too, just as it was about half an hour ago. he’s placing the dishes on the dining table while you excuse yourself to check on your messages.

something about how your colleagues have no sense of personal space. something like that.

he expects to see you bounding out of the corridor as usual, a little hop in your footsteps. a hum to a tune he thinks you make up.

instead, what he gets is the heavy trudging of the heels of your feet, the same kind he gives oliver when he’s weary and groggy and just wants to go home instead of getting another drink.

sae’s a quick learner. he really is. he learned how to talk to you, learn more about you. he can learn how to tiptoe around subjects you don’t feel up for talking about.

but there’s this mulishly desperate part of him that aches to know more about you. especially when your expression shows a side of you he’s never seen.

he feels on edge. he feels out of the know. he feels like he has to know.

“hey, what’s wrong?”

your bag is looped around your shoulder, the frustration on your face eking into every part of your body. your movements are erratic, your arms swing by your side. it takes you too long to find your shoes in the genkan.

“nothing, i have to go.”

your voice quivers like you’re trying not to break. sae’s heart doesn’t know how to feel about that. his hand reaches out before he can consider alternatives. it wrestles to take hold of your wrist but you pull it away before he can get a firm grip.

“y/n, tell me.” he’s nearly pleading with you this time, his feet heavy in the entryway.

all he knows is that he doesn’t want you to go. doesn’t want you to feel however you’re feeling alone.

but he doesn’t know a thing about you when it comes to whatever this is. and where the walls expanded, they crash down all over him the same. you’re shutting him out, a punishment that he was pardoned off all along until this moment.

when you don’t say a word, just stand with your back facing him as you struggle to put your shoes on right, sae tries again.

his head doesn’t know when to tell him that enough’s enough. doesn’t know the little nooks and crannies of you that prefer to be left alone sometimes.

“oh my god, what do you want?”

this time, you turn around and face him, and he’s not quite sure how to process the fact that there are already tear streaks on the side of your face.

“tell me what’s going on, let me help you.” sae’s not sure either how he managed to say that without choking on his words. he’s a mix of fear and concern. like if he says a single thing wrong and you’ll slip away forever.

his words make your heart ache. they do. because you want to believe that. you want to believe he means it. but the excessively distrustful part of you, the one that remembers baring your heart out to your partner only to have it flipped around on you is the one that’s ruled your mind since the relationship ended.

protect yourself. even in the wrong ways. just leave them before they get to leave you. disappoint them before they get a chance to do that to you.

a scoff leaves your throat, more harsh than you intended it to be.

“help me? itoshi, you barely know me.”

your heart drops. you’re sure sae’s drops further. the words come out of you uncontrollably.

you’re sorry. very sorry.

“what can you help me with, huh?” the slight upturn on your lips is all sneer and vile and nothing nice.

sae only hears you out.

you wish he somehow hears the words you’re thinking instead of what you’re saying.

you’re sorry.

“listen, you’ve been very nice to me, thanks. i’m pretty sure there are lots of other girls out there more deserving than me, so really, i’m grateful that you wasted a couple of days on me.”

sae’s expression doesn’t change. a subtle mix of confusion and heartache and you want to kill yourself for being so stupid.

“but we’re nothing to each other, okay? we’re barely even friends! you don’t need to concern yourself about me.”

it’s like you can feel the effort that’s waiting to pour out of him. the kind that would threaten you to take a step back and pour your heart out instead of letting your sharp tongue loose.

you can’t risk that. you don’t think you can.

“the jig’s up. i tried making friends with you so i could get more scoop, okay? it’s easier for you to approve it if you like me. that’s all there is to it. so please, i’m begging you,” you pause, the words catching in your throat because you could never mean them. “please just leave me alone.”

that seems to do it.

the effort that was waiting to pour out feels like it stopped. sae doesn’t have any other words to say. he doesn’t waste his energy on stopping you as you leave the apartment, letting the heavy mahogany close behind you naturally.

you don’t look back.

sae doesn’t look away.

it’s foolish of you to think that an escape with sae could help. it puts things off. it doesn’t help. nothing does. you should’ve known better by now.

you rush out of his building, a haze of gormless mixed with desultory. you don’t notice anything or anyone else. not even the figure that stares at you in shock as you exit the lift.

these two days were the best days of your life.

now it’s time to wake up.

she’s both the reason and the bane of your existence. 

your mother desperately points towards you when you make your way towards your front door. she has absolutely no qualms about giving you up just so she can see another day.

there’s multiple men by your front door. big, burly men. a lean, muscular one stands in the middle, his hand holding a fistful of your mother’s hair.

it’s the first time you’ve seen them. you’ve lost track of how many loan sharks your mother knows.

it takes nearly half an hour and half a million yen to shut them up and get them on their way. not without the leader among them giving you a kiss on the cheek and a warning that you won’t get to save your mother so easily the next time.

pervertic. that’s what you think his thoughts are.

usually you’re magnanimous. you’d let your mother get a word or five in before you give up on listening. tonight, you’re not so.

she’s just ruined your perfectly constructed dream day with someone who seems so foolishly earnest you nearly feel bad for him having to associate with someone like you.

someone with problems like this.

you walk the same path. you lock your own door and slump onto your own bed. you can hear the annoying springs and the chip of the paint surrounds you. right now you’re coming undone faster than the paint.

it isn’t raining but you wish it is. maybe it’ll be easier to drown out the noise of you crying. right now you’ll have to settle for burying your head in your pillow, the only comfort of your earlier time spent with sae arrested in the confines of his shirt you wore home.

a call comes in and you forget to check who it is. you pick it up without much thought.

if it’s sae you’ll just hang up. he shouldn’t have to associate with someone like you. someone who’ll only bring him problems.

but it’s not sae.

“oi, idiot.”

you’d recognise the voice of your best friend anywhere, through any medium.

you don’t say anything. you can’t, really. not when both your nostrils are blocked and if you open your mouth you’d just make an insufferably pained noise.

eita doesn’t say anything for a while either. he only hears the slightly muffled sound of your sniffing. it takes him only a second to extend himself.

“spare key still under the vase?”

you let out a noise of acknowledgement. he’s your best friend. he knows how to tell apart your responses by noise. he should understand.

he does.

you hear the familiar sound of his kawasaki revving to life.

“wait for me, okay?”

you do. only because you can’t sleep and eita likes to speed. he’s good at riding his bike so you’re never worried. he makes it there faster than you think he ever did.

there’s no shrill nagging when he unlocks the door. your mother must either be asleep or she’s already off trying to make your life more of a living hell. either way, it’s good she’s not here.

fuck her.

when he comes through your door, his own set of keys for your room nestled safely in his keychain, he doesn’t say a word. he only takes his place behind you, wrapping his arms around your shoulder, resting his chin on your head as you involuntarily sob into his arms.

he doesn’t say a thing. doesn’t need to.

his arms are a comfort in itself.

it’s familiar. never foreign. never scary.

re: taglists — since it’s been a while, i’ll discontinue the old taglist & start a new one :) it’s cool if you don’t want to be tagged anymore ! if you still do, just let me know !! but please make sure you are 18+ and have your age somewhere obvious & visible on your blog <3

[clockwayswrites]

Both Ways at Once Part 1

wc 868, Masterpost

“You’ve read the dossier?”

The clipped words were in time with their quick steps down the pristine white hall.

“Yes.”

“All of it?”

Danny resisted the urge to roll his eyes. “Unlike you, Hellblazer, I read my contracts before I sign them.”

“You wound me, Pomp,” John said, twirling an unlit cigarette between his fingers. “I’m just trying to protect you from the Big Bad Bat. He’s had a bit of a mare over this case. Hell, as a consultant, you shouldn’t even be seeing this with the access level things are at, but…”

“But you’re stuck and need my pretty baby blues on things to help you out,” Danny said, batting his lashes obnoxiously at John.

“Fuck off,” John said without any heat and shoved Danny away. “But the Bat is anxious about it. All the Bats are. If you can help us solve it sooner, then the better, because when the Bats are on edge, everyone is on edge. And it’s a fucking nightmare around here already with all the bloody do-gooders let alone when they’re all worked up about something…”

“Everyone’s on edge, got it.”

“Nightingale,” John said, voice unusually serious— serious enough to make Danny stop even without the hand on his arm. “I’m not saying this lightly. I like you, like you well enough for a psychopomp and whatever the fuck else you are at least. Tread lightly.”

“Got it, Constantine. I’ll work extra hard not to piss anyone off,” Danny said, patting John’s hand with his own tattooed one. Danny picked back up his same quick pace, but his mind now spun trying to figure out what exactly he was walking into. The dossier hadn’t gone into details, just conditions. Supposedly the risk— some side effect created by a villainous magical spell gone wrong— was presently and thoroughly contained. Danny would be able to observe the risk, the individual originally affected, and the items present at the time. He was not to interact directly with the risk, answer it’s questions, or under any circumstance touch it.

It read as a pretty standard contract magical unknown.

John wouldn’t be this concerned by a standard magical unknown. So what was he about to walk into? It seemed like he might actually want to listen to John this time, even if that was always a fifty-fifty chance of being an absurdly stupid idea.

Danny shifted his grip anxiously on the handle of his kit: an old traveling salesman’s briefcase fitted out with a careful collection of haphazard items. Most of the other occult practitioners mocked Danny’s tendency for used items. Half burned candles, old books wiped and rewritten, estate sale candy dishes— odd choices for most people, but for Danny they sang. They spilled the secrets of the world known and unknown to him. He had to trust that between his tools and his skills (let them believe he was a mere psychopomp), he would come out of this at least safe, if not with answers.

Didn’t mean that a few of his tattoos didn’t crawl in warning.

(Who knew what spot of skin that damn ink moth would wander to now.)

“Justice Leaguers,” Danny greeted with a nod as they finally finished winding through repetitive hallways and stopped outside a room.

“Nightingale, thank you for being able to attend to this so promptly,” Wonder Woman greeted him. Of the Justice League members (outside of the Darks) that Danny had interacted with on other consulting gigs she might be Danny’s favorite, so he offered her a smile.

“Of course, it sounded like things were possibly on a time table from the contract, so I’m glad I was between pressing matters,” Danny said. Right then his most pressing matter was a need to find a laundry mat, but the Justice League certainly didn’t need to know that.

“Right, well,” John jumped in when no one else said anything, not that Danny had expected much from Batman with how he was lurking like a shadow. “Er, this way.”

Danny glanced at the room label of ‘containment cells’ as the door unlocked with a clank and hissed open. After John’s warning, he wasn’t surprised that they were taking whatever this was seriously.

There was more white and gleaming metal behind the door. A neat row of spartan cells were set behind thick acrylic glass and metal. Danny’s eyes locked on the figure in the third cell. He stumbled.

He might be sick.

“What the fuck are you all doing?!” The words ripped from Danny in a snarl.

That was a protector spirit.

He brushed past Wonder Woman and through John’s reaching arm.

They had a protector spirit in a cell.

Intangibility washed over Danny, cold as always, as he stepped through the glass wall of the cell.

The spirit stopped in their pacing, the opaque red helmet tilting.

John screamed something at him.

The flashing red of alarms glinted off gleaming surfaces.

Danny reached out and rested his hand over the spirit’s sternum, and they practically crumpled around the touch. Gloved hands clung desperately to Danny’s arm.

A low growl rumbled in Danny’s chest. “They’re hurting you.”

They had a protector spirit in a cell.

How dare they.

----

AN: So, um, yeah. Still sick. Not a cold or allergies at all and not easy to clear up and prob a new life long thing. Which is great. Super cool. I needed more ways to be sick.

But have the start of this thing that I used to take my mind off things! My, what could be going on?? (Also why do I apparently have a tattooed Danny agenda?)

Stay delightful (and well), darlings!

I no longer tag people for various reasons. You can instead be notified by subscribing to the masterpost!

[the-moon-files]

Man, I love the trope of aliens being terrified of humans, and I've seen some fics of human!reader reacting differently to stuff like posions/plants in hyrule, but this is in another level! We are indestructible! I mean, I could live on Death Mountain! With the Gorons! It's literally a dream come true!

Also, the urge this would give me to give them all the hugs and piggy back rides whenever it gets cold/windy/whatever extreme condition.

If Hylians would be surprisingly light, would they be light enough for me to pick up Time? Just get that big ass man with a bunch of armor on my back? Because new need unlocked.

NEW NEED UNLOCKED INDEEEEDDD. (touches my fingertips together like a villain up to no good)

CREDIT FOUND!! (Who did it first!):

IDK who it was but someone mentioned in a rlly old 2023-2022? LU x human reader post abt the hylians being lighter in comparison to humans!! If i find who it is, or if u recognize u wrote abt smth similar pls leave a comment so I can @ you!! /gen

@wayfayrr :D ive been in humans are space orcs fandom (is it a fandom? More like endless AU idea ppl wrote abt on tumblr) for Years, and ofc i never thought to put with Loz this past year or 2 getting into this fandom dammit - UR WORKS AMAZING THANK YOU SM FOR MERGING MY 2 FAVS AND LIKING/REBLOGGING THIS HOT MESS 😭😭

GOD i NEED to play TP bc u can hold cats like this?? and u get to see LINK do it??? 😭😭

Sun: technically Masc! Reader but not explicit (you/he/him), coule be Gender Neutral, Human Reader

Orbit: headcanons-ish

Stars: The Classic Chain of Links

Comets & Meteors: Content: in Four’s desc. mentioned “diving into chest”, & Triggers: none known.

Please comment if I missed any. /gen

☆

A kinda 2nd part/expansion to this post!

no bc the “i can live wherever tf i want” was secretly part of why i wrote that post (so sue me, i wanna be able to follow wild around his hyrule w/o getting nuked)

OMFG SO GLAD SOMEONE WANTS TO TALK ABT HOW AFFECTIONATE YOU’D GET BC OF THIS TOWARDS THE LINKS (anduseitasanexcusehahai mean what? whatd i say??)

There’s only 2 types of Links in this hyrule(s):

Who’s already down with being cuddled at the slightest/not so slightest inconvenience??:

Wild

(unsurprisingly, also if anyone teases him he just teases right back that not only is it “for survival”, but also look he’s “getting Guide Cuddles™️ and You’re Not” lmao,

would sleep right up against ur bedroll every night if u let him, likes when you commit to the cuddle (even if he goes a little red), like wrapping arms + legs around him, adores fireside cuddles, has said on multiple occasions that nothing makes him feel safer than holding onto you, and how he can’t go back to doing things like this on his own anymore 😭😭😭

his favorite cuddle is whatever you give him LMAO u can always count on Wild if your ever feeling like u need to cuddle smth blonde and cute lol - he constantly offers or initiates it himself <33 )

Sky

another unsurprising one, his favorite time to cuddle is when it’s cold outside, or windy, and he can just get under a blanket and take a nap with you,

esp if it’s both and he can convince you to lay partially on him for heated + weighted human blanket purposes, he’s literally staring at you with sparkles in his eyes as soon as a breeze goes by lol

his Loftwing/Crimson wasn’t rlly able to fly u long distances u find out!! :( Hylians are just so light that ofc that explains why they can ride these pelican/ostrich creations for hours, whereas the bird can only rlly manage 20 minutes of low flying with you (+ Sky) on its back, but that’s fine, bc u figured out how to “shield surf” rlly fast down slopes to keep up with Sky flying low, and by “shield surfing” i mean, shocking Wild into jaw-dropped silence as he watches you fly by completely barefoot 👍

(after all, ur skin has to be pretty tough/thick to be able to handle the weather/environmental conditions, and finding out u can withstand lava? yeah this is nothing turns out)

secretly loves piggyback rides, but never asks, u just see him get this look in his eyes, and shuffling in place just behind you lol

Wind

touch starved, but what Link isnt lol

his favorite is piggyback rides, since he was raised by his grandma, and there weren’t a whole lot of close, young adults to pick him up as a kid

so now, he takes FULL advantage of u being able to easily pick him up lol

one time u guys were going uphill while a pleasant breeze was blowing-

actually it was gale force winds.

but ur you, so it took Wind flying backwards into you to realize. he also screeched at you for “ABANDONING ME- YOURE GONNA MAKE ME, A LITTLE GUY LIKE ME, CRAWL UP THIS?? HOW COULD YOU-” you give him piggy back rides whenever it’s windy.

will treat u like his own personal ship whenever ur both in the water, which consists of him yelling sailor terms like “turn starboard! raise the sails!” while sitting on ur shoulders while u get slammed (gently buffeted, really) by waves

Hyrule

shy, shy, shy, shy-

the quintessential:

“👉👈 🥺 is it okay, if we maybe hug rn?? I'm just rlly cold, and i know u said you didnt mind, and I saw Wild and Sky just laying on you, sorry if this is weird-”

Hyrule, sweets, you literally love him more than life itself, of course you’ll cuddle the fairy boy

the more excited he gets = the more likely to jump on ur back/wrap his arms around ur waist happily, esp since he’s an extra cutie patootie and will subconsciously seek u out if the environment gets a little rough

Sets an Amazing example for the other Links, not too clingy when ur busy, great at latching onto ur back when things get tough for him, asks politely and thanks you everytime he gets down <3

Hyrule is eternally fascinated by whatever u do, u just walk thru flood waters like it’s nothing and while the rest are used to it by now, he’s the only Link looking at you like your some kind of god 💗💘💖💕🙈

accidentally squeezed ur arm muscles one time when he saw u doing that thing where u curl ur arm and Wind/Wild were able to hang off of it,

you both just stared at each other for a solid minute before his ears turned down and he went completely red and apologized profusely for 5 minutes, before you just scooped him up too lmao (his face after tho)

Four

depending on the cuddle he gets shy sometimes, even worse if more than 1 Link is looking at you two, in which he will attempt to escape ur arms.

keyword being attempt.

you just wrap ur legs around him and trap him instead lol

likes to cuddle you somehow where he’s not in the way but you can keep doing whatever it is you were busy with

if he splits, then u can fucking bet Red is the first to dive into ur chest- unless there is literally, actively, a threat right in front of him, he’s going for it lol, Green loves to wrap his arms around one of yours and just hang off u all day, Blue will wait until ur sitting somewhere and flop on ur legs to purposely trap u there, the little shit, and Vio just likes hugs. he’s such a sweetheart, he just loves being wrapped up and wrapping you up 🥺

And who must be Convinced. (most to least)

Legend

fully expected,

silly man thinks he’s above love and cuddles, and all the good things in life LMAO came for ur throat again

it'll be below-freezing temperatures, in a cave with a barely there campfire, a blizzard outside, the other heroes complaining at him to just get under the blanket so you’ll get under the blanket,

bc you two are just doing that thing where 2 characters have like a table between them and are fake-out dodging left and right to try and catch the other lmao

is most susceptible to cuddles when he’s tired/injured/sick/sleepy.

it’s a cold morning and u just scootch the Links into a pile and use him as a pillow lol, and as long as no one, not even gods, perceives you two, he’ll let you stay

ok but you definitely caught him from falling into lava one time while on Death Mountain, and had to bridal carry him across half a lava lake back to shore, hehe,

Legend swore everyone there to secrecy on their own graves and favorite items

also refuses to let Ravio know of ur human advantages lol

he just wants the attention on himself as much as he can in between the other Links, no need for more competition

Time

silly man just doesn't think of his needs including affection/emotional comfort,

he only rlly initiates when the circumstances are dire, like gale force winds that he can barely walk thru/starting to slip, desert heat getting to him thru his armor and needs ur cooling touch, etc.

he keeps it as professional as he can, like wrapping an arm around ur shoulders, but you just snatch him by the waist and pick him up half the time, was surprised at first, chain giggled at him, then complained lightly, finally just accepted his fate anytime he touches you lol,

YES you have given him a piggyback ride, when a flood of water burst a dam during a battle/the other Links got out but Time didn't bc of his heavy armor,

so u yoink him up and just stood ur ground against the raging waves and climbed a rock until u weren't submerged anymore, poor guy was so worn out from the battle + the flood that he just let you carry him all the way until u camped for the night, and secretly took a nap 😭

like Legend he can be convinced to rely on u when he’s already vulnerable like sleepy/tired/injured/sick, but he does find himself secretly appreciative someone in the group can just lift his heavy ass in full armor/or someone else if it gets bad enough,

got converted and no longer has to be convinced usually, he just doesn't initiate much so u have to lol

Warriors

YET ANOTHER SILLY MAN!!

whats with all these idiots neglecting themselves, both physically and emotionally??

like boy u cant stand the heat of a desert or blizzard, just let in the cuddles 👹

similar to Time, just more vocal abt how appreciative/advantageous it is to have someone to be able to carry comrades out of harsh conditions or battles easily.

Did Not think abt this applying to himself until you literally swept him off his feet like a classic damsel in distress- mans let out a shriek after taking a second to process everything LMAO-

Loudly and Dramatically complains abt u coming to cuddle him, both just to love on him, and to heat him up in a rainstorm, but hugs you back and holds onto you anyway hehe.

Became the 2nd person to find out you’re immune to lightning.

See, everyone heard Legend talk abt u getting struck in a storm in Wild’s hyrule, but no one really came to full terms with it bc they didn't see it. Warrior is now a full believer. He actually got the closest to pissing his armor he ever has in all of his battles bc he forgot abt the metal in the storm = bad idea, until it was too late and u guys were trying to retreat to regroup, bc there were too many black-bloods, only to get full body tackled by you to avoid getting hit by lightning.

You had to bridal carry him for a minute after bc u just got back up after being hit, (it just felt like you rubbed ur body on the carpet and touched a metal wall, like a full body small static shock) bc he was in such a state of literal horror/shock,

Wars saw your life flash before his eyes 💀

Twilight

HA HA HA- HE NEEDS THE LEAST AMOUNT OF CONVINCING LMAOOO

goofy wolf man has wolf instincts that help ur case as to Why You Need to Pet Twilight’s Hair and Hold His Hand at All Times if Possible.

main reason Twi’s here is bc he thinks his height + weight = him not needing u to hold onto/cuddle as much, and he would be proven wrong HA

actually gets all blushy/shy anytime u pick him up, freezes like a puppy who’s gotten scruffed too lol

likes a lot more casual touch/cuddles, like arm around ur shoulder or his, sitting with legs touching, leaning against u when he’s cold, etc.

omfg funniest thing abt Wars/Time/Twi is that they’re the tallest out of the Links, so they make for extra fun when picking them up, cuddling etc.

but the best thing ever happened one time when Twi was still recovering from the Shadow’s wound, it got reopened/ached so bad he couldn’t run, but u all were trying to retreat at the moment bc Big Boss,

and u just snatched him up into a piggyback ride, his legs comically sticking out, but the best part was that Hylians are light.

so you were able to run full tilt adrenaline powered run, to the point you surpassed the other Links ahead, and had everyone laughing and simultaneously trying to conserve their breath to keep running LMAO

Twi grew up tall/bigger than kids his age, and is another victim of “no adult figures to pick him up when he was younger”, so he gets this little giddy smile when u pick him up lol <3

the first time u put him in a bridal carry for smth like river rushing waters, mans blushed, stuttered abt smth the whole time, and then didnt let go after you tried to put him down, u didnt have the heart to insist, so u just carried him around half of the day 😭

☆

sorry some have less than others, its nearly 2am I'm just riffing kicking my feet and shit, so I'm not being very thorough

i hope u liked my spiral into blonde twink insanity (well theyre kinda on a spectrum of twinkness)

anyway goodnight, and have a great weekend!!

to the 2 other ppl who sent asks, ill get to you soon and thank you sm for sending stuff :’)

Please feel free to send asks for requests or just to chat :)

Peace out,

🌙

[clementine-thedestroyer]

Thinking about smokejumpers or hotshots!141 x forest ranger or otherwise forest service employed reader…

(Hotshots, if you don’t know are the special firefighters that go in to do the really dangerous parts of wildfire fighting, and smoke jumpers are firefighters that parachute into remote areas.)

But, anyways- thinking about reader who’s either working for the national parks or forest service and somehow, ended up on the wrong end of a wild fire. Didn’t get the notice to evacuate in time, couldn’t- whatever the reason is. They’re stuck in the danger zone and convinced they’re going to die, curled up in the corner of whatever remote ranger station they’d been stationed at with soaked towels stuffed under the gaps between the door and frame and the air outside too hot and smokey for them to try and leave the house. They’re curled up in the corner fucking sobbing because they’re going to die there, they’re going to die, they’re going to die- until their door is busted down with an axe and a giant figure clad in fire gear shoves his way inside.

At first, they’re freaking out- they’re not thinking straight. The door being knocked down brings a rush of hot air and smoke billowing into the cabin that makes their eyes water and their lungs burn.

They try to fight the figure briefly, terrified and in a haze of fear and adrenaline as the person throws them over their shoulder like a sack of potatoes and books it the fuck out of there.

But from Price’s perspective (because yes, it’s Price) he and his team were working on the edge of the danger zone- trying their best to keep the fire from spreading further until he hears that there’s someone farther in- a forest ranger or something who didn’t get the evacuation order in time, who’s ranger station was never even expected to be in the path of the fire until the winds changed and left everyone, including them, scrambling to contain the fire.

He hears about it, and he doesn’t hesitate, yelling to Simon to work on arranging an evacuation for them all, because the fire’s growing and moving faster than expected and they need to get out of there.

So he absolutely books it the half or quarter mile to the little ranger station no more than thirty minutes from being engulfed by the fire and forces entry, finding you curled up in the corner struggling to breath through the smoke and sobbing.

He throws you over his shoulder without a second thought. There’s no time for him to explain himself or comfort you, he’s just running as fast as he can because he knows that while he may be able to survive closer to the fire’s edge with his suit and respirator, you certainly can’t.

When he gets back to his team, he can hear the helicopter. Gaz and Soap are screaming at him, telling him he’s out of his mind- that he had no idea that you were even still there or alive, that he could’ve gotten both of you killed, that what he did was stupid and reckless- while Simon is barley holding the situation together between the other two freaking out and his own worry for his captain.

The evacuation was a mess- between the already hazardous conditions and the addition of someone without any protective gear- but they make it out

Afterwards, you’re rushed to the hospital for smoke inhalation. You’re undeniably hurt, but you’re alive.

When you’re well enough to leave the hospital, you track down the fire crew that saved you, wanting to thank them. You show up at their door with a tray of fresh baked goods, shifting shyly on your feet as you present the tray of sweets to the tall, burly man you’re told was the one who carried you to safety.

You introduce yourself, stuttering out your words as you thank him and give him the treats you’d baked.

Behind the man, there’s two nosey men (and one less blatantly nosey man watching from the kitchen, though you don’t see him) sticking their heads out from behind him to get a look at the pretty girl their captain had pulled out of the fire.

They invite you in, ignoring your protests and worries about intruding and insisting you stay for dinner.

Price introduces you to his crew, taking the time to explain what they do, why he went back towards the fire to get you, how he’d know you were there, ect.

In a way, it helps you heal from the trauma of the whole ordeal some.

They ask about your injuries, how you’re doing- and slowly, the conversation turns more casual, with Soap cracking jokes and Gaz chatting you up about your degree and job with the forest service.

Safe to say, you spend a lot of time at the station from then on.

[bedoballoons]

I’m back

I’m not sure if you write wlw or nblw/gnlw or anything like that but hear me out

anyway I was thinking, imagine the (fem! Or gn!) mechanic reader (yes my genshin self insert is a mechanic and I’m delulu) with lyney or Furina, or any other characters you wanna add if you want (idk how this works). Where the characters keep breaking things on purpose just so that the reader can come over and fix it and so they get to see reader. The reader catches on and teases the character. (You can make it lead to nfsw or not if you want ;) )

also I’ll give myself an emoji so here’s mine

-💫

I do any forms of relationships as long as they aren't incest or pedophilia! I absolutely love this idea!! I think it's super cute so I hope you don't mind but I decided to make it fluffy!! Enjoy and thank you for requesting <3

P.s Can I call you the starstruck anon?

─⊰⁠⊹ฺ🍂𝔾𝕖𝕟𝕤𝕙𝕚𝕟 ℍ𝕖𝕒𝕕𝕔𝕒𝕟𝕠𝕟𝕤⊰⁠⊹ฺ🍂

{༻~Just one more thing before you go~༺}

CW: Super sweet fluff! Reader works as a mechanic and the characters keep calling them up to fix things so they can spend time with them!

(Includes: Lyney, Navia, and Furina!)

♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡

𑁍༄Lyney:

Lyney kneeled down beside you, trying his best not to get in your way as you worked on the latest broken thing in his home...he just couldn't help it. Whenever he was near you it was like his heart decided to do its own performance, beating faster and skipping whenever your eyes landed on him...because of this sometimes the simple machinery he used in his home...would mysteriously end up not working, "So how goes the fixing hmm? My apologies for having to call you out here again, usually I'd just have Freminet take a look but he's currently busy"

"Seems to me like someone's intentionally sabotaging your heater...they even left the screwdriver inside of it." You turned to him with a sly smirk playing on your features, holding the screwdriver up to him so he could read Freminets name from it. The blush that followed was so adorable you couldn't help but tease him a little, "If you wanted me to spend time with you Lyney, you could have just asked~"

𑁍༄Navia:

"I truly cannot thank you enough for coming to my rescue again. It seems every time you leave the Spina di Rosula has yet another problem to fix...of course it's not particularly a bad thing because I enjoy your company immensely." The beautiful blonde chuckled nervously, trying to get ahold of herself before she ended up confessing her feelings to you, she was honestly shocked she hadn't yet..

"I'm always here whenever you need me Navia, it's definitely not a bad thing for me. I get to hang out with a goregous woman and get VIP treatment from the Spina."

"You're always welcome to anything here at-...I'm sorry did you just call me goregous?"

"Well...I figured since you're always bringing me here to fix things you've clearly sabotaged, it's only fair a make a little advancement myself.~"

The poor girl's face heated up, you'd figured it out? How long had you known?! "I- oh my..."

𑁍༄Furina:

"I truthfully have no idea how anyone expects a archon to live under such conditions, every time I go to use something it's no longer working. If I didn't have you'd I'd surely have left this place for something better by now." Furina talked away while you worked, trying to act as normally abnormal as ever...even though inside her emotions were on a rampage. If only you knew she wanted so desperately to play the part of your lover more than any other role, she'd even sabotaged her own residence so she could see you more often.

"I actually believe I've found a solution to keep things from breaking...if the archon so wished to hear it."

She went dead silent, unable to fathom how you could possibly stop anything in her house from breaking, "The archon wishes to, even someone with my divinity can't even think how a simple human could make something no longer able to break, I'd love to see what maniac idea you've come up with."

"Its actually very easy, all I have to do is ask if you'd like to go out sometime. Then we could spend time together without you needing to break things~"

"I-i what on earth are you talking about? I wouldn't break something just to spend time with someone, I am a archon with a busy life. I don't have the time for such nons-"

"Lady Furina..."

"Yes?"

"You left your glove in the pipe."

"..."

"May I take you out on a date?"

"...yes you may..."

♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡

ଘ(੭*ˊᵕˋ)੭* ੈ♡‧₊˚~Have a nice day~*⁠.⁠✧

[shytastemakerthing]

Hello!!

I would like to request another Albino!reader but with Savanaclaw and/or Scarabia.

I think it'd be really interesting to have the boys see Albino!reader struggling in the hot weather of their dorm.

A/N: The albino!reader saga continues!! I am beginning to love this little series and I am glad that you are enjoying it as well! We can only begin to imagine what these dorms would be like for them! As someone who limits time in the sun and hotter weather (genetics makes me burn in 5 minutes despite all the sunscreen), some of that experience will be seen here. Enjoy!

Tw: None

Request: Albino!reader with Savanaclaw and Scarabia

Dividers are made by @blueberry-pride and @cafekitsune

This would take place shortly after the whole deal with Octavinelle and Azul's OB. Maybe a month

Leona didn't really notice at first, as you preferred to keep as much of your skin hidden and eyes covered

He will admit, he was a little curious, but never really bothered to ask you about it

Until he heard about the scuffle that was happening in the lounge of the dorm

Turns out he wasn't the only one curious, but he was the one that was smart enough to actually put hands on you

As several of his other dorm members did

All but paused the moment he saw you, and another beast-man who had your jacket basically torn in his hands and you desperately trying to cover, already feeling the heat against your skin, and seeing you grimace in pain

The story is, no one has seen him scowl so hard, Ruggie being the one to basically keep Leona from ripping into the beatman

After that, he actually picked you up, feeling the heat on your skin , and would take you back to his room where there would be more shade this time of day, already bringing out a few creams to help with the burns that were already forming

...... don't look at him like that

Listen, just tell him if you need anything to help with the heat and sun, especially if you start coming by his dorm more often, okay?

You were actually waiting for him at Savanaclaw to come back from spell drive practice

He had helped you out a few days ago in keeping you covered from the sun. It had been raining that day so you hadn't brought any coverings, but it decided to stop halfway through and the sun came out all bright. Ruggie had loaned you his jacket and you wanted to be able to repay him

And that led you to sit under one of the trees in the lounge by the water with a box of homemade donuts. After hearing of his love of said treat, what better way to repay him?

Being too wrapped up in waiting for him, rather excited, you had failed to notice that the sun had begun shifting, shoulders and back exposed to the sun

Oh, but Ruggie certainly noticed when he came into the dorm to see you there

Was torn between helping you and figuring out what you had in the box

Back in his room, he was eating one of said donuts while you sat on his bed as he applied a burn cream to your poor skin

Perhaps you can wait in his room next time?....... and he'll take more of those donuts as well

You had met Jack during one of his track meets. It was honestly kinda hard to miss you given your state of dress to shield yourself from the heat and sun

Certainly knew of albinism. He had actually seen a couple of people back home with the condition

So seeing you out here in all the heat, no doubt sweating under all of those layers, he had welcomed you back to the dorm to help cool

The sun was down but not to curfew time, so it was rather cool at the time and resting your feet in the water felt rather nice

Hence why you thought it was a good idea to visit him again a few days later

But now it was bright and sunny and hot

Trying to find him, you had actually gotten lost in the dorm, and once he heard, he was on his way rather quickly to find you

And when he did?

You were trying to fit under one of the smaller trees away from the sun and heat, but smiled when you saw him

He isn't one for the heat either, given it was certainly chillier and more snowy at his home in the Shaftlands

Straight up picked you up and carried you back as quickly as he could, trying to keep you hidden from the sun

Back to his room, he drew the blinds on his window and offered you some water

Maybe you can try coming to his home sometime? You wouldn't have to worry about the heat and sun as much

It was after the events of book 4 when he got to know you more

He had learned of your condition more when both of you were sent far out into the desert as before, you had always kept your skin and eyes hidden away, but you clearly struggled with the head

Being out in the desert, he figured out more about your albinism and how the sun and heat affect you

Now, Kalim can be rather smart when he needs to or wants to be and not always so naive (sunshine personality coping mechanism for childhood trauma between kidnappings and assassination attempts, I will die on that hill), granted he can still be very naive at times

Getting you back to the dorm was key priority, not just to stop Jamil, but to get you out of the desert before the sun rises

After all of that, you began to visit Scarabia more often

And he absolutely loved that

But he also saw how the heat affected you, as you chose to say nothing in hopes to spend more time with him

The next time he saw you, you were instantly whisked away to a new addition to the lounge he had made just for you

Shielded from the sun, just as lavish as the rest of the dorm, and nice air conditioning

From now on, want to meet him here? He will make sure you have everything to be nice and cozy when you come over!

It was after his own OB when he fully learned of your albinism

It was something that you never drew attention too

If he was being honest, he thought you were just extra protective of your skin from the sun like Vil was, not wanting any burns or blemishes to form

It was only afterwards that he found out it was because you were born with one of the more extreme cases of albinism, the sun and heat very easily able to damage your skin and eyes, quite literally capable of blinding you and causing irreversible damage to your skin

......and he had banished you to the ends of the desert within the dorm

Had you not made it back when you did with the help of Kalim's UM and the Octotrio.....

No, he wasn't going to think about that right now

After the events of his OB, you had been recovering in the medical room on and off for about a week and thankfully, no permanent damage was done

After you were cleared, the first thing you did was visit him and it became a more common thing for the both of you

He had been at club practice when you came by the dorm, opting to wait in the lounge, using a sweat towel to help keep cool

And he wasn't the most pleased seeing you sweating, even in the shade, it can still be dangerous

Straight up grabs you and takes you to the kitchen. It's cool in there, he can get you some water and a cold press for your warm skin, and make a snack for the both of you

Can you keep visiting him? Please? He's never had care like yours before and he doesn't want too lose it any time soon

Thank you for this request! I really enjoyed it!

[rinrinx2]

Let’s Pretend

Toji x Y/N

Summary: Toji needs a fake wife for a mission who better than you.

Warnings: Smut, inappropriate language, talks you through it, mentions of d£ath.

Toji looked at Shui unsure of what his exact reaction should be to the mission he had offered him to complete.

The money he would obtain would be enough to sustain him for the next few months, to allow him to live a soft comfortable life until he would need the next mission to fill his pockets.

“You need to pretend to be a married couple”

He couldn’t deny the money aspect of this mission Shui proposed, the only condition he was unsure about was the requirements this mission had.

Toji was letting Shui’s words hang in the air so that Shui would be able to hear how stupid it sounded.

“Don’t give me that look Toji” Shui said as he pulled out his cigarette cartridge, knocking out one as he placed the stick between his lips.

“I will obviously provide you with the necessary partner to play the role of your wife” He said lighting the cigarette, taking a deep inhale.

“Is it really necessary for me to act like a couple, can’t I just complete this mission alone” Toji said slighted agitated.

“No the client detailed that you need to play the role of a married couple in order to complete the mission, besides think of it as someone who can take half the burden of the mission” Shui said blowing out smoke.

Toji has that look of clear irritation painted on his face, the raised brow, his eyes slightly raised, his top lip twisted into a snarl and his body slightly hunched.

Toji was as lazily as they came but as much as he was lazy he hated any assistance that might be given for a mission. There was a certain way he conducted his missions and having another person would only ruin the system he had perfected.

Shui let out a chuckle taking in Toji’s expression. He had worked long enough with the assassin to know what he was already thinking. But before Toji could protest any further Shui spoke out again.

“You’ll meet her at the necessary location of the mission”

“How will I know it’s her” Toji said eyeing the smoking man.

“You’ll know and Toji formal” Shui said as he dropped the half smoked cigarette as he put it out with his expensive shoes.

Toji sipped at his whiskey leaning against the bar he stood at.

God, I hate this monkey suit

Toji thought slightly flexing against the restraing of the cheap polyester suit he had scrummaged out from some forgotten nook of his wardrobe.

Toji continued to sip at the whiskey, watching as the minutes ticked by on his watch, every minute feeling longer than the last as he waited for his so called partner/ fake wife for the evening.

If she doesn’t pitch soon I’m just gonna kill the fucker needed and head home

So entrapped in his thoughts he hadn’t felt the presences of someone standing beside him. A red flag in itself as if someone was skilled enough to get by him undetected a clear indicator of his partner.

“So, you usually stand here looking obvious?” the voice beside him spoke in a sarcastic tone.

“Do you always take this long to show up to places?” Toji replied back in an even more sarcastic tone as he slightly looked over at the woman who would be his partner for the evening.

From the brief look he took at you, he was impressed. From the black dress highlighting your figure, with curves in all the right places, healthy looking hair, a face that belonged on a screen and an ass that was just begging to get smacked.

“Maybe I should thank Shui” Toji whispered under his breath to himself.

“What was that?” You say turning your head slightly to Toji.

“Oh nothing …. But honey we should get a move on” Toji said putting on the act of your fake husband as his hand went to the small of your back, placing his empty class on the table as he guided you away from the bar.

Toji guided you to the lobby of the busy hotel, as the two of you made your way to the front desk. You remained calm and natural, with a soft smile on your face as you placed your hand on Toji’s chest, as the diamond on your ring finger shown brightly in the warm lighting of the lobby.

“Good evening, we have a booking for the Fushiguro’s”

“Good evening” The front desk man said with a vibrant smile that highlighted his smile lines.

“Ah yes, we have one. For a newly wed couple. I would like to thank you on behalf of our establishment for having your honeymoon here” the middle aged front desk man said with that smile not leaving his face.

“Thank you” Toji said as he took the key from the man’s hand.

“Please be sure to use all our hotel has to offer”

“Don’t worry I’ll make sure to use everything thoroughly” Toji said with a smirk as he eyed you up and down.

The middle aged man kept the smile on his face, trying his best to not react to Toji’s innuendo as you slightly slapped his chest in a playful manner trying to make it seem as Toji and you were simply just a couple in love not to assassins sent out here to murder someone in this lovely hotel.

“Well this is urhm definitely a lovers suite” you announced as you opened the door of your hotel room to reveal a rather interesting room set up.

A massive bed, with a rather larger oak head board that had an interest pattern of diamond shapes carved into it, with coincidentally silk rope decorating the diamond shaped holes. In the corner of the room was a rather large chair that could easily, comfortably seat two people , with one person that could be seated atop of the other.

You look around the room some more, as you felt Toji push into the room beside you.

“Get over it doll face, we got the baby making room. Relax” he said placing the suitcases onto the floor beside the bed.

“Not like you’re gonna make one in here” he said rolling his eyes slightly.

You walked into the room slightly irritated at his comment as you watched him unpack the suitcase that held various guns.

“So, when are we going to take the target out?” You asked approaching Toji.

“Tomorrow at breakfast. His some fat guy, bald head. His apparently dealing in curse objects he stole from some cult he pretended to be in. So, we have to take him out get the objects and that’s that” Toji said as the finished his sentence off rather nonchalantly.

You looked at him with a raise brow, slightly impressed as to how easy he made the mission sound like.

“So, you know why we have to pretend to be a fake couple?” You asked further a slight smile of amusement on your lips as you sat on the bed in front of Toji.

“Nope”

“Well we have to act like a couple because baldy knows you’re single, so Shui suggested we pretend to be a couple on our honeymoon to throw him off it could make it easier for us to get closer to him” you replied with a smirk as the tip of your black heel was now underneath Toji’s chin, causing his gaze to meet yours.

“Well pop the champagne, Shui’s a smart man for a change” Toji replied as he gripped your foot away from under his chin.

“You’re a real fun guy” you said with sarcasm in your voice.

“Sugar tits, as much as I find you attractive and would easily screw you; we have a mission to complete and that’s the goal” Toji said as he starred down at the suitcase placing one gun on the night stand.

You looked at Toji with a smile of impressiveness, you had heard all sorts of stories and rumours about the handsome assassin in front of you ranging from unethical and impractical and yet here he was holding restraint from taking you.

“Come on we need to go to dinner, if we can fool everyone into thinking we’re married it will be easier to take the fat bastard out tomorrow at breakfast, he won’t be suspecting a thing”

“Is there anything else I can get you, sir?” The waitress asked as she eyes Toji up and down with a smile pressed onto her red lips.

“Nothing at all, but please be sure to ask my wife” he replied not giving much mind to the young woman serving use.

You had to admit Toji was really playing the role of the loyal doting husband. The way he held your hand over the table in view of everyone, to how he attempted to share his food with you.

“I’m fine. Thank you” you replied looking up at the waitress, as you watched her walk away with that smile not budging.

“How many times is that waitress going to come and ask you if you need a refill” You said rolling your eyes slightly.

“You sure are a possessive wife” Toji teased as he bit down on the pasta he was eating at.

“I get it you’re handsome but handsome enough to get this woman come up to us every five minutes to ask to top up your wine you haven’t even touched”

You would’ve continued your rant till a familiar man came up to you and your husband.

“I’m sorry to interrupt, but your wife is extremely beautiful. I think I might of seen her on the cover of a magazine”

Fat bald bastard

The lights in Toji’s head shone bright as the target they had to kill was right in front of him.

“Thank you, her beauty is really one of the reasons I married her” Toji replied trying to remain cool and collected as to not suspect the target.

“Well, then on that note I hope you don’t mind if I bought your beautiful wife a drink”

“I’d love that but she only really like to drink in private” Toji replied not wanting you to drink whatever liquid the man would give you unsure if it was laced in case he recognised the two of you.

“Ah please, everytime I see a beautiful woman I have to buy her a drink. Well if you don’t want me to buy her a drink why don’t I send a bottle of champagne to your room” the fat man said with a wide smile as his red cheeks shone like polished balls.

“Sure. We’re room 17 F”

“Why didn’t you just kill the guy when he came to our table?” You asked as you rubbed your lotion into your legs.

“So, the whole restaurant can go into a frenzy and the guys at his table shoot you dead on the floor. No thank. We have to be subtle” Toji replied as he got underneath the sheets.

“Aren’t you thoughtful” you said, as you were about to climb into bed yourself until you realised what you were doing as you starred at Toji.

“What” Toji replied as he felt your eyes on him, unsure of what stopped you from getting into bed until he realised.

“God just get into bed, I’m not going to sleep on the floor. If I had to fork out from my money to pay for this expensive as hotel then I am getting to sleep in the bed. So you either get into bed with me princess or the floor is waiting for you”

You rolled your eyes in annoyance at his words, as you climbed into bed not wanting to have to lay on the cold floor with nothing but your silk slip dress nighty to keep you warm.

“Smart decision” Toji said as he turned his back towards you.

You laid in the dark room for a moment, unable to sleep as you tossed and turned. Your movements not going unnoticed as Toji rolled to face you now.

“I can’t sleep” you whispered to him.

“Just close your eyes”

You huffed out a sigh as you closed your eyes, but still you were unable to fall asleep.

“Still can’t sleep” Toji said with his eyes shut feeling as you were still awake.

“Why don’t we do what husband and wife do to help them go to sleep” Toji said opening his eyes, as you could sense the smirk in his face even in the dark.

“I thought you didn’t want to screw me”

“Well that was before supper, I was hangry and I mean we would only being playing the part we were given for this mission” Toji said as you felt his hand move up your thigh.

“Besides wouldn’t it be obvious that we’re not married if people didn’t hear noises from a honey moon suite”

You breathing became harder, as you listened to Toji’s words trying your best to comprehend what he was saying but the feeling of his calloused hands running up your soft thigh was turning your brain into mush by the second.

You felt as his fingers reached your pantie line, feeling as he played with the lace of the thong you wore.

“Pull them to the side” Toji whispered.

You complied easily not even protesting as your pulled the flimsy fabric away from your pussy, surprised how you were already wet from such a simple action.

“Atta girl” Toji said, as he slowly moved his fingers to your pussy, massaging your pussy lips, revelling in the puffiness of them as he felt the wetness of your slick start to drip out. Gently taking his index finger and pushing it in between your folds as he gathered your slick onto his fingers, pulling his finger out as he smeared it onto your puffy pussy lips.

“You like princess?” Toji whispered into your ear, as you wrapped your arms around his neck, breathing heavily into his chest.

“I’m gonna push my fingers in now” Toji said as he began to move his index and ring finger into your warmth. Pushing the digits in and out of you, feeling the tight wetness around them.

“Enjoy the feeling baby” Toji said in the sweet seductive voice as his other hand came down to the small of your back pressing your closer to him, as he felt your move against him in pleasure.

Toji began to move his fingers faster, feeling as your pussy allowed him to push his fingers deeper in. And they nudged perfectly against that bundle of nerves, Toji chuckling softly as he watched your move around as you writhed with pleasure.

“Found that spot” Toji began to massage that sensitive spot that had you seeing stars. Toji could feel you get close as he felt your pussy get tighter and tighter by the second.

So close to your high, but before you could fall over the edge you felt as he pulled his fingers out. You pulled away from his chest looking up into his eyes as he brought his soaked fingers to his lips as he licked your wetness off of them.

“Delicious”

As the words left Tojis lips he began to kiss you passionately, his tongue lapping at yours as you tasted yourself on him.

“Take it out”

And you did as he instructed, pulling his hard member out of his boxers.

“Take your dress off”

You quickly sat up and pulled the silky fabric off your skin.

“Lay back down and turn on your side”

You now laid on your side, feeling as Toji’s hard cock pressed against your ass, his tip slightly leaking pre-cum as his hands began to massage your breasts.

The cool air of the room and the roughness of his hands causing your nipples to be hard and your pussy to get wetter.

“You want me to fuck you?”

You nodded, desperately wanting Toji to fuck you.

“Beg for it”

You breath caught in your throat at his words, like dry and mind muddy with pleasure as you tried to form a sentence.

“Please ~ ah. Please fuck me Toji”

Toji didn’t need to hear another word as he slipped his hard member in, keeping still as he let you adjust to his members size.

You could feel his thick girth filling you up as he knocked against your cervix from his length.

“I’m gonna fuck your brains out now” Toji said as he began to move, slow and steady rhythm, as he pushed his tip slightly out before plunging deep inside you m. The loud sloshing noise of your pussy and whiny moans filling the room.

“That’s it take my cock. Feel it fucking fill you up”

Your mind a puddle of pleasure as your pussy was now being rammed by his thick cock as his hands squeezed and pulled at your breast, feeling his hot breath against your neck as he fucked you from behind.

“You like being fucked like you my wife”

Toji said biting on your ear, as he moved faster, feeling your slick drip down his thighs. Toji could tell you were getting closer by how your moans became louder and more desperate and from the way your pussy was starting to milk him.

“I’m gonna cum in you, so cum for me princess”

Toji’s hand came down to your clit, as he rubbed the swollen bud trying to get you finish on his cock faster. Rubbing the slick bud up and down.

“That’s it right there”

Toji could feel his own high reaching as his balls began to constrict and relax a clear sign his hot cum was ready to shoot out, as it moved up his shaft.

The feeling of Toji’s cock stuffing you and his fingers playing with your clit became to much as you felt your pussy tighten around his cock. Toji felt as you came hard, shoving his cock as deep as he could in you.

“Fuck yes baby”

Toji growled out as he felt himself shoot ropes of hot cum into you, feeling as he painted your insides a nice pearly white.

Suddenly without any warning your bedroom door came swinging open.

“I decided to bring your champagne myself I hope I’m not disturbing”

Without another thought Toji grabbed the gun he had left on the nightstand shooting the fat bald bastard down in one swift motion as the champagne bottle came falling down to the floor, the liquid spilling all over the carpeted floor.

You turned your head over your shoulder looking at Toji, with his cock still buried deep inside you, as you tried to catch your breath.

“So much for subtle death”

.

.

.

Hope you like it <3

All rights reserved to @rinrinx2

[noroi1000]

hii noroi! saw you opened your rq for 2 weeks 👀 neways- can i rq angst where reader dies bc of mahito? like what happened to nanami and how stsg react? i live for the angst!!

Too weak

Heavy angst warning!!! Character death!!!

Summary: You thought you were strong enough to fight without their help...

You slowly walked down the alley when you knew your boys were waiting on the other side.

You kept a hand on your very hurting side.

You told them that you are strong and as a special class you will be able to defeat the special class. You told them you would go alone and when you were done you would come back to them. And you also said that if you needed help, you would call them. Because you wanted to show them that you can be as strong as them.

But you were too weak.

You had to run away. That's why you ran between buildings and when you didn't feel like you were being chased, you stopped running and walked towards them.

You didn't want to die. The wounds should be normal for a Jujutsu sorcerer.

But this thing wasn't a wound. Your whole side was black. It hurt so much. As if the pain radiated throughout your body. You couldn't speak without whimpering.

There was no blood on your clothes. But this terrible pain prevented you from doing much but suffering.

There was a ray of hope in your soul that they would help you and you would return home. Everything will be fine

"You were supposed to be strong. And you are. But you can't be untouchable, can you?" Your opponent's words echoed in your ears.

And his sadistic smile couldn't fade from your mind.

With each step you took, you felt your bones breaking. As if it was made of such a fragile thing.

You ignored the pain you felt and kept walking.

But the moment you saw your boys, you just gave up and lowered your body to the ground.

Sitting against the wall, you called out their names quietly.

"...Satoru....Suguru..." Your lips were dry and you thought that nothing could moisturize it.

You just want them to overcome the curse and take you home. So that you can be together with a smile.

But why was everything blurry outside of their figures?

When their eyes landed on you, they were a little scared.

You were sitting on the ground, tiredness visible on your face. They ran up to you, checking your condition.

"(y/n), are you okay!?" Suguru began to check you over completely. His hands explored you and you gave him a weak smile.

You came back after half an hour. And the fact that you are here may mean that you have won or escaped.

"...It's just a little scratch..." You coughed slightly. "I was just too weak for it."

You gave them a weak-eyed smile.

You always wanted to see them in the last minutes of your life. Be with them. But you don't die. It's a small wound that just needs treatment. You are alive. You don't die. You are here with them all the time.

"Too weak for this... Sorry..."

"You don't have to apologize." Satoru reassured you, moving your hand away to check your wound. "Suguru, can you take care of this curse?"

"Maybe we should take care of (y/n) first?”

"You can leave her to me! I can take her to Shoko now!" he said with worry and a smile to calm down the situation.

You couldn't see it, but your skin was so pale. Your veins throbbed as you sat in front of him. Your skin felt so very hot despite how it looked.

And there were darker circles under your eyes. You looked completely different than half an hour ago.

You had to get care quickly. Therefore, the best way will be to take you directly to Shoko. But you're conscious. That's why it's good.

"Should I change her soul into the shape of a rabbit? That would be fun! You finally released a little defenseless bunny for my amusement!" A voice echoed through the alley.

Your eyes widened as you knew he hadn't stopped chasing you.

You reached for Satoru's uniform, but suddenly you couldn't feel your body anymore and you fell limp in his hands.

"(y/n)!"

You felt your lips become wet. But it wasn't saliva or water. It was much more dense.

"Such a little soul! It was sweet! I would like more sorcerers like this to play with! Experimenting on special grade sorcerers is exciting!"

You felt a great pressure in your head whenever he spoke. Like something was about to burst your skull. At the same time, your side hurt so much.

"Please hold on a little longer! I'll take you to Shoko now!" Satoru shouted and tried to pick you up. But as soon as he wanted to get up, he felt like your body was crumbling from the inside. As if you were so fragile and one squeeze could break you.

Suguru looked in horror at the black cracks on the skin of your hands. Several of them had small drops of blood oozing out.

Feeling weaker from the pain, you breathed a little weaker. Your vision was blurry. You couldn't see anything but their faces.

The terror in Suguru's eyes as he set his curses for protection when he also wanted to take care of you.

"...There is no time... Toru..." you moaned weakly, feeling nothing but blood on your tongue.

In the distance, you heard a quiet psychopathic song about a dying rabbit.

If it were Suguru's voice, you would be calmer. But it was the voice of a curse that wanted to watch you suffer, slowly killing you before their eyes.

You just wanted to go home...

Have you asked for too much?

Was that too much of a desire?

You were too confident to fight this curse... You went there without help...

Was your desire to go home really too much? A dream that can't come true?

„The bunny lay in tears, For me is time to cheers~”

Since when have you been crying?

Or maybe it's true...

"...Toru... Sugu... I'm sorry... I was too weak..." you jerked hoarsely.

"No no no! It'll be fine soon!"

"...Sorry... I just... Wanted to go home...to much..." You moaned, not knowing he had said anything as your ears were filled with the same thick liquid as your mouth.

You forced your aching facial muscles to show them a smile.

"...I just want to... Go home–."

Your breath hitched suddenly as the imaginary song in the background ended.

„And for the song end, The bunny is just dead.”

Blood flowed from all over your face as your breathing hitched and your body became as soft as marshmallows in his arms.

All they could hear now was the chuckle of the curse behind them. And their own breaths as they watched your body not move at all.

"...(y/n)...?" Suguru whispered, unable to breathe for a moment. And then he looked at the petrified face of Satoru whose blindfold began to drop tears onto his cheeks.

With a muffled whine, he moved your body closer to his, hugging you. Suguru grabbed his neck, resting his forehead on his shoulder as he was terrified by the sight.

"Aww... I wanted more fun... But this was fun too!"

What will be the most painful death for the curse?

Almost kill, absorb, release and torture until death. Watching the suffering.

Just like they had to lose you, that curse with the stitched face will lose the smile from its face...

[dira333]

If we have each other - Kazekage Family

Summary: Shinki finds a Mother Figure by accident, or how two people falling in love looks like from a 4-year-old's perspective

Shinki and Shikadai are about 4 years old in this...

Words: 4k

Shinki didn’t mean to get lost. Father will be upset.

All the trees look the same now, and he knows it’s because he’s panicking, but that realization doesn’t help ease his nerves. His breathing is coming faster now, iron sand swirling around him.

There’s movement in the bushes. He holds his breath, hoping, wishing for someone to come and find him.

But it’s a deer, looking at him with dumb empty eyes before returning to where it came from.

Shinki sits on the damp ground, fighting the tears that threaten to spill.

He practiced hard to get his kekkai genkai under control, to make his father proud. And now he’s ruining their celebration, his first visit to Konohagakure to meet extended family, by getting lost in the woods. 

To his left, he can hear movement. He doesn’t look up this time, expecting the deer to be back again.

When instead a voice speaks up, his iron sand reacts without his incentive, shooting forward.

He turns just in time to see a woman deflect the hit, jumping out of reach. The sand drops, returning to him as he stands, scared and relieved at the same time.

“Who are you?” Shinki asks, voice shaking lightly even though he makes sure to carry a threatening tone.

“You’re Shinki, right?” You ask, eyes surprisingly warm for someone who just got attacked. “I’m Shikamaru’s cousin, Shikadai might have told you about me.”

Shinki thinks back to their conversations. His cousin isn’t that talkative. Shikadai mostly prefers to nap. 

But you look like Shikamaru, he thinks, the resemblance calming him down. You’re family too.

“Are you- are they looking for me?”

“Probably,” you tell him with a smile, “I was out collecting antlers when Mosabi came to get me. That’s the deer that spotted you. You wanna get back to the house?”

“Yes, please.” He carefully dusts his clothes off before looking at you for further clues. To his surprise your hand is outstretched.

“Wanna take my hand? It’s okay if not.”

“No,” he grabs it, relishing in the contact. He’s never too sure when he’s allowed to touch others and the iron sand makes it impossible for others to touch him without his explicit permission. Perhaps that’s why Father isn’t as touchy-feely as his uncle is with Shikadai. 

Your hand is warm around his and you don’t seem afraid of him at all. Do you not know his powers? How dangerous he is?

“So you’re visiting from Suna, right?” You ask just as he readies himself to address the topic. “What’s it like? I’ve never been there.”

“It’s a desert village.”

“I know,” you smile warmly. “But what’s it like? What do you like about it?”

“Like… about it?” 

You point above you. “Konoha has a lot of forests. That’s my favorite part of the village, going to a place where you can’t see the sky anymore, where everything above and around you is all the shades of green you could possibly imagine. I have a lot of plants at home too.”

“Father does as well,” Shinki exclaims, the words spilling from his mouth without his intention. “He collects Cacti and he even gets them to bloom.”

“He does?” You ask, showing interest. It’s the first time someone’s asked him about Cacti in a while and though he tries to respect others for not caring enough about them, he can’t help but judge them a little. Cacti are great. And Father, able to get them to bloom, is even greater.

“Yes! Cacti are very delicate plants, you know, and they only bloom in perfect conditions. Every species has different wants and needs, so you have to know them well.”

“And your father does so?”

“Yes!” Shinki nods eagerly, “Father is very knowledgeable. He is teaching me as well and I’m a good student.”

“I believe you are,” you smile, moving as if to brush through his hair. The iron sand immediately rises to stop you and you freeze, hand in the air.

“I’m sorry,” Shinki apologizes immediately, “It’s my Kekkai Genkai, I don’t mean to attack you-”

“It’s fine,” your smile doesn’t falter. “I should remember to ask before I move to touch. It’s only polite after all. May I mess up your hair?”

“I suppose,” Shinki offers, not sure what the purpose of this kind of touch is. 

But then you do it, and he can feel it. He shivers, warmth spreading through his cheeks.

“Can you do it again?” He asks before he realizes that the words slipped out. But you don’t look taken aback by his request, instead ruffling his hair softly for a while until you tuck a strand of it behind his ear, the gesture warm in a way he hasn’t experienced before. It feels like getting a bath or getting tucked into bed, like Uncle Kankuro making his favorite soup for dinner and pretending he likes it as well.

“Let’s get you home, huh?” You say, sounding just like Father when he takes him to bed.

“Can we visit your aunt?” Shinki asks the next time he’s in Konoha. 

Shikadai blinks at him in confusion. “I don’t have an aunt.”

“Your father’s cousin,” Shinki explains and Shikadai blinks again.

“Sure, I guess. I’ll ask.”

“Ah,” Uncle Shikamaru makes a face. It looks like he’s about to yawn, but then he doesn’t. “She’s at work boys, I’m sorry.”

“Where does she work?” Shinki hadn’t gotten another chance to talk to you the last time he’d been here, but he remembers the warmth of your touch and the way you kept smiling at him.

“At the hospital. She’s a poison specialist and cultivates herbs and medicinal plants for them.”

“Oh,” Shinki considers it for a second. “Can we visit her when she’s back from work?”

“I’ll ask her to come around but don’t be disappointed if she doesn’t show up, okay? Her work hours are pretty long.”

Shinki’s familiar with not being disappointed. He thinks he’ll manage.

The day drags on after that. He manages to convince Shikadai to train with him for a while until he gets too tired. Father comes in around Lunch time to sit and eat with him, before disappearing to another meeting with Uncle Shikamaru, leaving Aunt Temari to look after them. He likes Aunt Temari. She never hesitates to give him something to work with, teaching him stuff Father might think him too young to learn.

“Aunty,” he asks, as Shikadai naps yet again and he’s working on his latest embroidery project, “what do you like about Suna?”

She laughs softly. “Where’s that question coming from?”

“I’m not sure, but-”

“Don’t worry,” she picks up Shikadai’s head and drops him in her lap, carding her hand through his hair in a gentle manner that makes his own scalp tingle, longing for the sensation. “I’ll tell you. But it’s a long list.”

Shinki looks up at that.

“There’s the sunset. The sunsets are not the same here. How the night sky is so clear at night, barely any clouds to cover the stars. How you can breathe freely because no trees are blocking your sight. Do you want me to go on?”

He considers it for a second.

“I really like how warm it is,” he answers a question he’d been asked months ago and not by Temari. “as if the sun’s settling in your bones.”

Temari smiles. “You got that right. What else?”

You show up right after Dinner, exhaustion pulling at your body. He can see it in the way you walk, slow steps, back a little hunched.

But you smile at his sight and your smile is just as warm as it was the last time he saw you.

“Hey there,” you wave at him, “how was your day?”

There are a lot of things he wants to tell you. From the question he still needs to answer to the questions he has for you - not to mention the present he’d been working on for weeks at home - but now everyone’s eyes are on him and he can hear his panic in the rustling of his iron sand moving around him.

“I am fine, thank you,” Shinki says stiffly, wishing for himself to be different. Father’s hand rests warmly on his shoulder, no doubt to calm him down. In the time it takes him to gather himself you’ve exchanged pleasantries with the other adults. Father has his arms crossed now, cheeks a little reddish. Did you say something that made him upset, Shinki wonders, looking from the Kazekage and back to you. But no one else seems upset, there’s even a grin playing around Uncle Kankuro’s lips.

“I forgot,” you say, sending him a look and a poorly veiled wink, “I have a present for Shinki at my place. Do you wanna came with me and get it?”

“Can I?” He asks immediately, thinking of the time he’ll get alone with you, able to say some things without being the center of attention. If he plays his cards right he can give you your present too, without anyone watching.

Father hesitates for a second, exchanging looks with Temari before nodding.

“It’s alright. But I want him back here in an hour, is that okay?”

“More than okay. We’re just going to get a plant or too, nothing too serious,” you promise before turning to him. “Do you need to get your bag first?”

You take his hand on the way over, soft warmth in the cool night, listening as he tells you all about Suna, all the things he likes and learned to notice.

“When you walk through some streets,” Shinki recalls fondly, “the sky disappears too. Everything around you is different shades of brown and red and yellow, depending on the minerals used. It’s like in the woods.”

“That sounds mesmerizing,” you point out, a faraway sound to your voice, “I’d love to see that someday.”

Desire tugs on his heart. He could show you around. He could have you and Father and Suna at the same time.

“You could come-” He starts, cutting off for a second. “Visit me, you know?”

Your eyes flicker over and you smile. “I could, couldn’t I? Maybe I will one day when my work allows.”

He squeezes your hand on accident, thinking about that. You squeeze his hand back.

“I made this for you,” he exclaims in the safety of your apartment, after he’s done three trips looking at every single plant there is. There are so many, despite the small space, making it feel more like being in the woods than indoors.

It is a tapestry, barely big enough to cover both your hands. He’s spent weeks agonizing on what to put on it until he decided on something you’d already talked about.

The bloom of Father’s Cacti had been plentiful that month, each blossom a different, vibrant color. 

Now he’s carefully watching your face, not wanting to miss any hints. Do you like it? 

“Oh Shinki,” you breathe out, “it’s marvelous.”

His face blooms with heat.

“Can I hug you?” You ask and he nods, lump in his throat. You pull him in, warm and safe and oh so different from all the other people who have hugged him before - not that there are many. 

Father is tall and strong, and touching him often means touching another layer of protective sand. He’s careful in his approach, giving, but never taking. He smells like Cacti and the dessert and his hair always tickles Shinki’s neck when they hug.

Uncle Kankuro and Aunt Temari hug him quickly if they hug him at all. More often than not they move as if to mess up his hair before deciding against it, offering him their hands to a high five instead. They’re not the cuddliest people, he thinks, and that’s okay.

But hugging you feels like sinking, like being drawn in, like giving and taking. You’re warm and soft, yet sturdy enough to keep him upright, swallowing him whole yet leaving him be. Shinki doesn’t want to let go. 

“You know,” you tell him on the way back, his arms heavy with the two plants he got to pick out, “if you want, we can write to each other. Shikadai mentioned that you wrote him too.”

“Yes, I do,” Shinki nods, “Shikadai knows a lot of words. I like writing him.”

“You know, most children your age don’t know yet how to write,” you muse. “How do you feel about that?”

The question comes out of left field. How does he feel about it?

“What are they doing instead?” He asks, wondering. Are they napping with their parents, like Shikadai? Do they get to play with their friends, like he’s allowed to do when he’s visiting Konoha?

“I’m not sure,” he answers eventually.

“That’s okay. You might figure it out later.”

“How do you feel about it?” He asks, looking up at you. A shadow travels over your face.

“I am very proud to know such an intelligent child,” you tell him, lips pulling into a smile. “And polite, too.”

His lips pull up as well, unable not to smile back at you.

“Are you going to work the whole week?” Shinki asks, shifting the pots in his arms. He’d wanted to carry them himself, but he’s now regretting it. If you’d taken one, he could have held your hand on the way back too.

“Sadly, I do.” Your smile turns into a frown. “I’d love to spend some more time with you. But if it’s not too late for you, I can show up after work, like I did today. If you want, you can show me how you made this embroidery and I’ll teach you how to take care of your new plants.”

“I’d love that,” he admits.

You stay true to your promise, showing up each evening after work.

At first, the grown-ups seem a little confused by your presence, though Shinki wastes no time dragging you into the room he’s sharing with Father and Uncle Kankuro.

“I prepared everything for today’s lesson,” he explains, showing you the fabric, needles, and the different colored strings. “Today I’m teaching you about the different stitches.”

“Do you want something to eat?” Uncle Shikamaru asks from the doorway. “When did you get Dinner?”

“Oh, I’m not that hungry,” you wave him off, smiling when Shikadai settles in your lap without question, eyes closing instantly.

Shinki’s a little peeved that his cousin’s taking up the space in your lap. If he’d be more forward or if his Kekkai Genkai would allow it, he could- but then again…

“How does that look?” You ask, turning your project for him to see. “Is it good, Shinki-Sensei?”

He blushes at the formal title.

“You don’t have to call me that,” he insists, though it feels good. 

“Shinki,” his Father’s now standing in the doorway, dressed in his proper Kazekage uniform, the hat in his hands. “I’m leaving for tonight. Are you going to be okay?”

“Yes,” he gets up and walks over, torn between wanting to properly say goodbye to father and wanting to cherish every minute he gets with you.

Father gently pats his shoulder. “I see, you have company. Don’t stay up too late.”

“I won’t.”

And there it is again, a quick exchange of words between you and Father that ends with a hue of redness tinting his Father’s cheeks. And your face has changed too, your smile different now. 

“Do you like Father?” He asks as soon as the front door has closed behind him. He knows not to ask questions like that with other people listening in.

Your shoulders pull up to your ears.

“What makes you think that?”

“Because you smile when you talk to him.”

“He’s hard not to like, don’t you think?” You ask and Shinki doesn’t know how to answer that, so he falls silent instead.

Shinki likes getting letters, but he likes getting letters from you best.

You usually start answering his questions before you ask him your own, always following up on the important stuff. How he’s settling in, how his experience is with training, how the Cacti are growing… And then, on a separate page, you add information about yet another plant, poisonous or not, that he can add to his collection. He likes your drawings of the plants, the detail you put into making sure that the petals have the correct color so that he can safely identify them in the future.

Sometimes you write Father letters too, though those have no added drawings and he usually reads them in private. They’re not that interesting, Shinki, thinks because you mostly just talk about your day-to-day.

They’re planning their next trip to Konoha when the letter arrives, from Shikamaru this time.

It arrives out of the ordinary, on an otherwise normal Tuesday, and the way Father’s brows furrow has even Uncle Kankuro stop what he’s doing.

“What’s wrong,” Uncle Kankuro asks.

Father says your name and Shinki turns, a weird feeling in his stomach.

“What is it?” He asks.

“Apparently, she’s fallen ill. A surgery was necessary, but her recovery is thwarted by the amount of work that needs to be done. Shikamaru asks if we could take her in for a few weeks, keep her from her work so that she can fully recuperate.”

“Can we, Father?” Shinki asks, mind racing. He’s going to be able to show you Suna, isn’t he?

Father exchanges a look with Uncle Kankuro, who grins and folds his hands behind his head.

“Don’t look at me, Gaara. You’re the one who can’t keep his eyes of her when she’s around.”

Shinki furrows his brows. “Do you suspect her to spy on us, Father?”

“What?” Father turns. “No, nothing like that, Shinki. I-”

“Your Dad likes her,” Uncle Kankuro grins. “Probably as much as you like her, Shinki.”

“So she can come?”

Father sighs. “She can come. But-” He raises his hand. “Don’t overwhelm her. I know you want to show her everything, but first we have to make sure she’s resting.”

Your skin is paler than he remembers, the white of your eyes a sickly yellow. You walk a little hunched and your bags are being carried by another Konoha-Shinobi. Shinki remembers him, the telltale green of his uniform, the thick eyebrows and the bright smile.

“Friend Gaara!” He launches into an excited tale, but Shinki steps to the side, a little unsure on how he’s supposed to be greeting you.

“Can I get a hug?” You ask, sinking to your knees. He nods, dropping himself into your arms. 

You might look a little different, a little worse for wear, but you still feel the same, warm and safe.

“Are you excited to show me Suna?” You whisper into his ear. “I bet Gaara told you that I’m supposed to rest first, right?”

“He did. But you really don’t look good.”

You laugh softly, flinching at the same time. “I’m going to be as good as new in a few days, don’t worry.”

Back at the Kazekage residence Shinki shows you your room.

“You should lie down,” he insists, pulling back the blanket. “My room is right next door if you need anything.”

“Do you wanna lie down with me?” You ask, flinching again as you stretch out on the mattress.”

“Am I allowed to?” He asks, the words slipping out before he can think twice about them.

You blink slowly. “I’m allowing it,” you tell him softly. “But only do it if you’re comfortable with it. You can try and if you don’t like it, I won’t be hurt if you want to leave again. I’m sure you have a lot to do.”

Curious, he slips out of his sandals and under the thin blanket. Your body is warm and it feels like a hug, but different.

“Where did they do surgery?” He asks, turning onto his side a little.

Your eyes are closed but you raise an arm and point at the side of your stomach.

“Here. You want to see the scar?”

“Can I?” 

Instead of answering you pull up your shirt, revealing puckered skin that’s an angry red and hot to the touch.

“I think it’s inflamed,” he points out, a little worried now. 

“That’s probably right. I’m going to rest a bit now and by nightfall, it’s going to be better, I’m sure. I’ve just been on my feet for too long.”

“Okay,” Shinki turns onto his back again, looking up at the ceiling. “Can I stay with you until then?”

“Sure.”

Shinki’s supposed to be in bed, he knows. 

But you’re just a room away and he can’t sleep, skin itching.

So he slips out of bed and out the door, unheard, unseen.

Though, you’re not alone.

He can hear soft voices through the door, both of them familiar.

Father is with you.

For a moment he thinks about stepping through. Sure, Father sent him to bed, but he’s just saying “Good Night” one more time. 

That is, until he hears his name.

“Do you want me to talk to Shinki?” You ask and Shinki freezes, doorknob in his hand.

Talk to him? About what?

“I think that’s my job, is it not?”

“Perhaps, but I can tell you’re having problems with it.”

“I’m not sure if he understands.”

“He’s smart. He will understand.”

Understand what? Shinki shivers, the coldness of the stones around him seeping into his bones.

“Gaara,” you say now, your voice now different from before. It reminds him… it reminds him of Uncle Shikamaru when he calls out to Aunt Temari, that smile on his face that Uncle Kankuro calls lovesick. “Rest. We’ll talk about it in the morning. You’re thinking too much.”

“No one told me that starting a family would be this difficult.”

“It’s not. You’re just making it difficult,” you laugh softly. There’s the whisper of linen. Did Father just slip into bed with you?

Slowly, carefully, Shinki unwraps his hand from the doorknob and takes a step back.

He’s not sure what he just witnessed, just that it’s something of importance.

Father eyes him over the breakfast table.

“You did not sleep much last night,” he concludes. “Do you want to stay home and rest? Keep our guest company?”

“Father,” Shinki swallows around the lump in his throat. If he wants to ask, he needs to ask now, before the rest of the house wakes up. “Did you spend the night… with her?”

Bright red bleeds into Father’s pale cheeks. His eyes widen.

“How-” He takes a deep breath. “You know?”

“I wanted to say Good Night one more time,” Shinki confesses, staring down at the table. “And I overheard.”

“I suppose,” Father sighs softly, “I suppose this is as good time as any. We were talking… We’re considering… What do you think about having a mother?”

-x-

“Mother,” Shinki calls out to you, “Hurry.”

“I’m here, I’m here,” you laugh, catching up to him. “Incoming,” you warn him just seconds before your hand messes up his hair. “It’s just Shikadai.”

“Yes, but he’s been training,” Shinki insists. “And I want to know who of us has gotten better.”

“Ah,” you smile. “I’m sure you’re going to do great. I’m proud of your growth.”

Shinki grumbles something, turning away when you move to mess up his hair even more.

“Stop,” he insists. “I’m not a little child anymore.”

“No, you’re not.” You smile, squinting at the Horizon where the Thunder Train is starting to appear. “But you’re always going to be my favorite son.”

“I’m your only child,” Shinki reminds you, nose curled. He likes being called your favorite, even though he opposes it every time.

“Oh, I don’t know,” you whistle an innocent tune. “That might change, you know?”

Shinki freezes. “Are you saying-”

“No,” you smile, shaking your head. “And if I were, I wouldn’t tell you like that. But what are your thoughts about it? Would you mind?”

He considers it, watching the Thunder Train approaching.

His hand finds yours, squeezing it. You squeeze back, no words needed.

“No,” he announces eventually, just as the Train halts in front of them. “I wouldn’t mind.”

part 2