#so you did. and oh. it was so much worse to think you could have it. that you had it together. and then finding he knew it was never a

[burnforyou]

TUTOR - LUIGI MANGIONE x READER

!SUMMARY! this COULD be a part 2 to creep but it can also be read as a stand alone. nerdy Luigi is tutoring reader and he gets head for the first time!!! he's subby (ish) and innocent <3 enjoy!

“do you think you understand it now?” he asks, putting his pen down. you hesitate.

“can i ask you something?” you look up from the chemistry papers scattered on your desk to his face. how is he so pretty? he looks so ravishing in his perfect maroon sweater with a button up underneath. the color makes his skin glow.

from the moment he walked into your house, you'd been trying to come up with a plan to get him into your bed. and when you saw how hard he was under the table, you knew he was feeling the same way. had you purposefully worn small pajama shorts to try and tease him? yeah, maybe, but your plan was pretty successful, so you weren't ashamed.

little did you know, he's been hard since before he even entered your house. did the sight of your practically bare legs make it worse? yeah, definitely, but he'd been trying to calm himself down all day but nothing has seemed to do the trick. just the thought of walking into your home has had him worked up all week. when he saw you requesting tutoring he almost cried.

“sure, what’s up?” you place your manicured hand on his thigh and he stiffens. his eyebrows furrow and his dark eyes flicker between your hand and face.

“are you a virgin?” he freezes. is it that obvious? he sits there in silence for a few seconds, frozen. his mind goes completely blank, what do I even say? fuck, I have the most beautiful, smart, woman sitting in front of me and she wants to know if I'm a virgin?

“you don’t have to answer that, it’s just that-“

“i am.” he spoke up, looking away shamefully.

“no, no, no, i’m not judging you. i just noticed that, you uh, are kinda in a sticky situation down there and, i haven’t even touched you.” he looks down and tries to adjust the tent his hard cock has made in his jeans.

“don’t be ashamed," you slide your hand further up his thigh and move closer to him, "I just want to repay you for helping me so much, with chemistry and calc, if that's okay with you."

"yeah," he squeaks out, embarrassed at how high pitch his voice comes out. you suggest going up to your bedroom and he complies, following behind you silently. he struggles to tear his eyes away from your ass, watching it move up the stairs.

he plops down on the edge of the bed and you push him back until he's sat against your headboard. you crawl up the bed to him and sit on his lap. his hips buck and his mouth opens at the sudden friction on his already hard cock. he felt so overwhelmed: your scent surrounding him, being in your bed, you on top of him, for fucks sake.

you lean in and capture his lips with yours, his lips naturally molding against yours. you press your hands lightly on the sides of his neck. his hands stay awkwardly at his sides, gripping onto your sheets every time you grind on him through your thin pajama shorts. you break the kiss and smile down at him, holding his head carefully. he looks up at you with his doe eyes and a million thoughts swirl through his mind.

"you can touch me, you know that right?" you whisper.

he nods silently and hesitantly places his hands on your hips.

“has anyone ever touched you before?”

he shakes his head. you lean down and kiss him again. this time, he breaks the kiss with a question.

"are you sure you want to do this? you don't have to repay me for anything."

"oh I'm sure, I've been plotting on you for a while now."

"r-really?" he struggles to get out, shock evident in his voice.

"don't act all innocent now, I know that you think about me. I see you in class, looking at me the whole time. its just surprising that you're a virgin, especially for a handsome guy like you." his face flushes at your compliment, his lips threatening a smile. "now, let's get this sweater off, hm?"

he allows you to tear his maroon sweater off his body and discard it on your floor. you admire his abs by running your hands up and down his chest, content with yourself. he sits there and wonders how much you truly know about him, if you know he's truly a creep, deep down.

"do you want to know a secret?" you say, looking down at him. he nods eagerly and you laugh.

"you're so eager," you giggle. you lean down, putting your lips right on his ear teasingly. "I know that you watch me through my window."

his whole body stiffens and all the color drains from his face.

"I touched myself too that night." you say, smiling down at him. he's not sure what to do, whether he should be happy or ashamed. before he can come up with something to say, you're dragging your hands down his body, kissing all over him. you smirk as you kiss directly down his happy trail, finally reaching his waist band. you fiddle with the button and pull the zipper down smoothly.

he quickly picks his hips up, pulling down his jeans and boxers at the same time. you lick your lips at the sight of his heavy cock, so hard it sprang against his stomach.

you leaned up, connecting your lips with his once again and simultaneously reached down to grasp his cock. he broke the kiss with a gasp and he screwed his eyes shut tight at the feeling of your soft hand gripping him.

"you're so big," you say, looking down to admire his pulsing cock in your hand. his tip shone with pre-cum, red and needy. he whimpered at your compliment, his face almost as pink as his dick.

you bent down, pressed a kiss on his tip and licked down his length. he let out a noise similar to a whine.

"please," he whimpered. you finally wrapped your lips around his tip, looking up at him to watch his reaction. he squeezed his eyes shut, his mouth falling open in a silent gasp. he instantly bucked his hips into you and groaned, your mouth welcoming him further.

"fuck," his hands flew to your head, gripping onto your hair. you wrapped your hand around his hairy base and moved your lips up and down his girth, settling into a gentle but fast pace.

"baby, oh," he whimpers, letting out a low, guttural sound when his tip hits the back of your throat. his chest rises and falls faster than he thought was humanly possible.

you keep taking him so deep it has tears streaking down your face and saliva down onto his balls. it felt like something straight out of his fantasies.

"y/n, just like that," his moans fill the room, making you weak. you come up for air, your lips letting go of his cock with a satisfying pop. he removes his hand from your hair and caresses your wet face.

"you're so perfect." he says, smiling. “it feels so much better than i’ve ever imagined.”

you go back down on his cock, completely taking him once again, never breaking eye contact. his tip hits the back of your throat and this time it has him shooting hot cum down your throat. he lets out a shocked groan and his head falls back, his Adams apple bobbing. you swallow all of it and lick down his cock, cleaning him off completely.

"fuck, I'm so sorry y/n, I didn't mean to cum so quick." he looks away, ashamed. you reach for him and force him to look at you.

"you're alright," you say, giggling again.

"it just felt so good, nothing like I've ever imagined." he confesses, rubbing the back of his neck. he suddenly realizes how vulnerable he is, sitting on your bed completely naked and fucked out of his mind while you're completely dressed and satisfied. he likes the power you hold over him.

months of yearning for you have all built up to this moment. he reaches for you and swings your leg over his lap, planting you on his already re-hardening cock. he leans into you and kisses you, finally full of confidence and a need to have all of you.

have you ever tried this one?

I AM UNSTOPPABLE!!!!!!!!!!! MERRY CHRISTMAS FREAKS!!!!!

!TAGS!

@strawbrriess @bellobambino @f4nfic-lover @btcowboy @chmpgneprblem @soggysouppp @hereandqueer6540 @poohkie90 @bricapallen16 @miarosalie11 @v1rtualsalvat10n @hypnotizedbyhood

[themuseofaphrodite]

know that you and i shouldn’t feel like a crime ✧ OP81

summary: after viewing a series of viral tiktoks, you decide to partake in the “hear me out” cake trend with your very wary boyfriend.

trigger warnings: suggestive & mature content, swearing

word count: 1k

⊹₊ ˚‧︵‿₊୨୧₊‿︵‧ ˚ ₊⊹

One of your most surprising qualities was that you were a TikTok fiend, especially since you were usually down to earth and didn’t use your phone much in public — but for good reason. Your “For You” page was filled with some of the weirdest, wackiest things: dangerous extreme sport challenges, odd filters used on pets for a quick laugh… the list could go on. Each video was a perfect way to destroy your reputation as the effortlessly suave McLaren princess.

You slouched on the creaky recliner next to Oscar Piastri, your boyfriend of almost three years, and sighed loudly, garnering his attention immediately. He was perfectly attuned to your every movement and breath, which was why you liked him so much. Nothing was worse than a nonchalant man, and Oscar was anything but that.

“Hm, darling? Everything OK?” Oscar looked up at you from where he was sitting, pausing the television with a careless flick of his hand. “It’s getting late, maybe you’re tired? You did have a long day.”

You shrugged one shoulder, feigning coolness. “No, I’m fine, I’m not tired. I just have an idea.”

Oscar raised one eyebrow, already on alert. That last sentence always warned him that something was afoot, and nine times out of ten, it was never anything good. “Oh, no. What now?”

“There’s a trend going around” — this made Oscar visibly tense, a vein in his neck going taut as he waited for you to continue. He disliked the viral pranks and never laughed at any of them, to your dismay — “and I was hoping you’d be willing to participate in one of them with me?” You batted your eyelashes, giving him puppy dog eyes, a trick you knew he couldn’t resist.

“If my mates find out about this,” he warned you, waving a finger menacingly at you like a stereotypical villain. “No posting this like you did last time.” You stifled a laugh at the thought of the last prank you engaged in, and the way it had broken the Internet when you posted it on social media. Oscar had not forgiven you, and it had been almost a year.

You shook your head solemnly, extending your pinky finger out to him so he would interlock his own in an unspoken vow. “I promise you I won’t post it.”

“Good.” He pursed his lips, obviously remembering the media disaster that had unfolded last time. McLaren had not been happy with him in the slightest, to say the least. He was still making it up to them even now. “What’s the trend?”

You edged yourself closer to him, tilting your chin conspiratorially and speaking in a low whisper. “Hear me out.”

Oscar’s eyebrows furrowed, clueless. He scrolled through TikTok very rarely, mainly preferring to stick to television, and sometimes Instagram reels, so he had no idea what you were talking about. “Pardon?”

“So, basically,” you explained, your voice bright with mischief, “you have to think of a few characters, or people, that you think are attractive, although others might disagree with you. For example, hear me out,” you started, a moment’s pause between your response. “Bumblebee from Transformers.”

Oscar’s jaw dropped as the name clicked. “The robot? You want to tell me that you find a machine attractive?”

“He’s protective and sweet, and has really good music taste,” you defended, pouting.

“Goddamn, Y/N, starting off strong.” Oscar hummed under his breath, thinking. “Hear me out, Megan Fox but in Jennifer’s Body.”

You groaned loudly, annoyed. “That’s not a ‘hear me out’. Everyone agrees that Megan Fox in that film was beautiful. It has to be something unhinged, like, hear me out” — you clucked your tongue, pondering over the various choices floating around in your mind — “the Goldfish cracker on the front of the bag.”

Oscar made a distinct choking noise, his face flushing red. “An animal? God, Y/N. I should report you to the police so they can put you behind bars.”

You swatted him on the shoulder, barely missing him since his reflexes were superhuman. “Try again, Osc. Really shock me with this next one, please.”

“Hear me out…Belle from Beauty and the Beast.” Oscar waited for your approval, and you sighed, throwing your hands up in the air in surrender. “What? How was that not good? She’s a cartoon!”

“Everyone loves Belle! She’s fierce, intelligent, and stunning. All qualities that are conventionally attractive!” You shook your head. “Come on. Hear me out, a string bass.”

Oscar’s eyes widened to the size of saucers. “What the — Please tell me you’re joking, love. There’s no way you could find an instrument attractive.”

“A bass is tall, deep-pitched, and mysterious. Just what I like in a man.” You beamed up at him. “OK, Oscar. Don’t disappoint me.”

He side-eyed you, tapping his fingers on his lap as he thought. “I have one.” You watched him with bated breath, hoping that he would finally catch on. “Hear me out, Sydney Sweeney, in general.”

Oh, for fuck’s sake. “I give up, Oscar. I should’ve known that this wouldn’t have worked. Lando would be so much better to do this with… Let me ask him if he’s free.”

Oscar rolled his eyes, pulling you onto his lap before you could escape, and giving you a quick peck to your lips. “Sorry, darling. Better luck next time?”

You huffed. “Whatever, Oscar. I forgot you were an inadequate, basic white boy.”

Oscar nudged his nose against your jaw, whispering in a husky, deep voice. “Hear me out, my girlfriend, Y/N L/N. She might be batshit crazy sometimes, but she’s absolutely breathtaking. When she’s underneath me, begging for my cock like a good girl? It’s a fucking work of art.”

You suppressed a shiver, looping your arm and burying yourself against him, arousal dancing under your skin. “Fuck, OK. You win.”

He kissed you again, a smirk dancing on his lips. “Oh, I know. I always do. Future world champion, remember?”

“Arrogant prick,” you muttered, but your curses were swallowed up by a new wave of kisses Oscar pressed against your lips.

⊹₊ ˚‧︵‿₊୨୧₊‿︵‧ ˚ ₊⊹

[blue-drink]

Baby in the Watchtower (He is Baby pt. 2)

“Marvel!” He turned around to see an exited Flash right in his face.

He stepped back a little, “Woah, what is it?” He asked.

“Bats gave us permission to hold a little party—,” he fake-coughed, “reunion, on the Watchtower, in 3 hours.” The speedster jumped while whispering, “We are planing to connect a Switch to the presentation screen.”

“Oh, well. Have fun.” He wasn’t really sure why he was telling him that, tho.

“Aren’t you coming?” Oh, that’s why.

The Captain wondered for a moment, but his thoughts were interrupted, “Sorry, Billy. But we already made plans, remember?” That’s true; even with the signed documents, they still had to ‘move some strings’ so he was officially adopted in Fawcett’s records and completely recognized as a child of Zeus on Olympus.

His smile faltered a little, he hoped Flash didn’t see it. “Ah, sorry. I have places to go, family matters, y’know?”

For a second Flash looked disappointed, before widening his eyes and asking “Wait, you have a family? Wait, wait, that came out wrong.”

He breathed for a second before trying again, “Well, everyone in the League thought you did not have a secret identity. Because you do not hide your face, and all.”

Solomon, secretly as much of a trickster as the rest, guided him on how to respond.

“Ah, well, you weren’t wrong.”

“Wait-what?”

“Technically it’s not official yet, that’s what I’ve to take care today; and I’ve only been with them for...” “A month,” Mercury whispered in his mind; it was a lie, but it was to throw them off track. “For a month.” He lied.

“How does that even happen???” The hero asked, confused.

“Supes is eavesdropping, answer truthfully to avoid suspicion.” Hercules informed.

“I... Didn’t have a family. I was living on the streets. I’m better now, tho!” He quickly reassured before anyone could start scolding him for keeping that to himself. “I’m fine. I’m going to fix some papers to be officially part of the family.”

“You were on the streets????? And you didn’t tell us???”

He did not know how to keep talking about this, so he let Atlas take control for a bit, “I did not know any better.” It wasn’t a lie, all his foster homes were worse. That would not be how they would be interpreting.

“I found a place, they even know I’m a hero!”

“That’s... So cool buddy.” The speedster said, trying to sound positive, but grimacing all the same. “I’m so happy for you.”

“It’s true, he is happy for you getting a family, but he is sad for you having to live in the streets in the past.” Solomon decoded for him.

“Thank you!” He exclaimed happily, with seemed to make the other more uncomfortable; but his patrons family told him not to mind him, that it was ok.

“Well, see you around!” He said, turning to the Zeta tubes.

“Bye bye.” Flash said, failing to meet his excitement.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

“New Marvel lore just dropped!” The speedster exclaimed, running into the room.

“Dude, the party does not start in 2 hours— I mean, the reunion—”

“I know you wanted it to throw a game party,” Batman interrupted. “What were you saying about Captain Marvel?”

“Okay, okay,” Flash jumped into his seat, “so, you remember that bet about if he does or not have a S.I. (Secret Identity)?”

“You got an answer???” Green Lantern questioned.

“I think so? Now the question is if that bet counts until last month or currently.”

“Wha-” Aquaman asked, confused.

“I invited him to the party, and he kinda looked sad for a second, and then he told me he had ‘family matters’ to attend to.”

“So he does have a S.I.! How does he keep it shut?”

“He also, kinda, implied that that was new. He said that...” He paused. “It turns out he was homeless.”

“... What?” That came from Bats, surprisingly high-pitched as well.

“He was living in the streets until a month ago. He said that technically he wasn’t a part of the family officially yet, that he was going to fix that today.”

“Sometimes I forget heroism isn’t a paid job.” Wonder Woman said, “Oh, brother.”

“Is this information confirmed in any way?” Batman asked; if the facts could be a misunderstanding, he would need to know so before putting them in the Captain’s archive.

“I was eavesdropping,” Superman admitted, “his heart rate and breathing were steady, unlike when he does pranks. And he wouldn’t lie about something like this.”

Martian Manhunter raised his hand, “sometimes I received feeling of worry about food and warm places from him, even when avoiding looking into his mind, until recently. Not exactly one month, but that could be because he is used to worrying about it.”

“Now that I think about it, maybe that’s why he doesn’t wear a mask;” Arthur said. “He didn’t have anything nor anyone, so he didn’t worry about losing anything by having his identity revealed.”

“That doesn’t explain why he didn’t tell us.” GL counter-argumented.

“His villains know. In the recordings, they seem to reference a secret identity they know; and if they knew about him being homeless, it would explain them targeting almost empty buildings. That’s probably where he was staying.” Gotham’s knight answered, “And maybe it wasn’t about us finding out about someone, but us finding out about his situation.”

“He is the type to refuse help if he thinks it comes from pity.” Diana added.

“... What now?” The situation was too unexpected, and Flash needed some hint on how to proceed.

“Now, nothing changes. He hates pity; and if he needs help, his new family will provide it for him. Treat him the same you have always treated him.” Bats answered. “If anything, make sure not to say anything that may be hurtful towards his situation.”

************************************************************************

“Oops,” Marvel said. “Double oops,” Billy responded.

“It seems the spell from that user has interfered with the transformation.” Solomon explained through Marvel.

“Well, I can see that. What do we do now?”

“Wait a sec, I’m asking Hecate.” Mercury answered this time. “Okay, that spell is still in you— our? Marvel’s system; if we try to de-transform again it could fragment us further, which is no good, and we can’t re-integrate until it’s out.”

“How long?” “At least two days.”

“Wha— I have a JL meeting! Today!”

“I’m sure we can manage,” Achilles proclaimed confidently.

“Ah-ha, sure. Because any of you know how to act like Captain Marvel.” Billy said, sarcastically.

“I have an idea.” Zeus said.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

“Hey, I kinda have a problem.” Receiving a text from Captain Marvel was not a common occurrence, so Batman was rightfully intrigued.

“Explain”

“I know I have to go to the meeting, I know it's important. But I kinda have to take care of one of my family members. He’s a kid and everyone is busy today, and he really loves superheroes, so if I could?”

“Doesn’t he have school?” The bat questioned. “He is homeschooled” The captain explained. “He is a really, really good kid, I promise”

He was going to regret it. “Very well, but he is your responsibility”

“Thank you so much, Mr. Batman, sir!”

He closed the chat, and opened another with Clark and Diana. “Captain Marvel will bring a child he is babysitting to the meeting, pass the word.”

Let’s hope this wouldn’t be a complete chaos.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

“Captain Marvel, now arriving.” “Unknown, Captain Marvel’s guess, now arriving.” The Zeta tube prompted.

“Yo, Cap,” Barry appeared in front of them, “who’s the kid?”

The child imminently peaked up, “Oh, gods. Hello, Mr. Flash, sir.”

The speedster felt déjà vu. “Hello, little guy. What’s your name?”

The kid putted, “I’m Billy, and for your information I’m eleven and a half!”

He laughed, “not so big if you are still counting the half.”

“That half is 5% of my life, or 2 years of yours.” Billy said with an almost creepy smile.

He turned to the Captain, “dude, what’s wrong with your kid?”

Marvel just smiled, “Oh, come on. He’s just playing.”

“He called me an old man!”

“First, no he didn’t. That words haven’t left his mouth.”

“He implied it!”

“Second, you implied he was a baby.”

“What a menace.” The speedster gave up. “Anyway, let’s go.”

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

“Is everybody here now?” Superman asked, ignoring the exited squeaks from Billy.

“Yeah, sorry, I’m late.” Marvel answered.

The meeting started; a bit boring. Passing reports, making sure everything of the JL was in order.

An hour later; they were technically done, but could not leave until Bats gave them the thumps up.

“Hey, kid, look.” Hal said, making forms with his ring. Billy praised it like he hadn’t seen it a hundred times before.

“That is SO COOL, Mr. Green Lantern, sir!” He exclaimed.

Quickly, all the members noticed the resemblance between the Captain and Billy. Which, for them, was weird. He had only been part of the family for a few months, who could the kid act so much like him? Were all people in Fawcett like this?

That was assuming he wasn’t related to Captain Marvel; but, taking into account that he had managed to hide being homeless for a year, it was possible he was Marvel’s child.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

He was searching information about the kid; of course he was, he is Batman.

William ‘Billy’ Joseph Batson, orphan at 5, disappeared from foster care at 8 and reappeared a few months ago. Was homeless, until a couple found and adopted him. ‘Jove Olympia’; he opened one of his archives, this one on Greek mythology, and ran a facial recognition program. 90% match between ‘Jove’ and one of Zeus’ statues.

The facts were clear. The Captain, C. C. Batson, pronounced dead, transformed into the god's avatar, found his son Billy running from CPS and ended up living in the streets with him to protect him.

December is specially harsh on the homeless; the Captain probably asked, begged, his patron to take his son to safety. And so he did.

[rayshippouuchiha]

The Lone Wolf Dies

End-Class Princess: the Other Assassin

In which Takeshi looses the plot, Kurokawa Hana ends up dragging him along with it anyway, and a dog starts to revert to a wolf.

—

The first day of middle school, Takeshi hears some classmates sniggering about a prank they played on Sawada-Chan. They seem so pleased with themselves, at the reaction that Hibari-Senpai will have when she makes it to school tomorrow. Takeshi frowns slightly. Sawada-Chan is nice. She didn’t deserve that. He resolved to try and be extra nice to her when she came back.

—

Takeshi is restless. Sawada-Chan hasn’t been at school all week. They’d had a test already, and everyone had laughed about his low scores, saying that at least he had baseball. It stung worse than usual, turning his head slightly and not seeing a distressed pair of brown eyes and wringing hands. He hadn’t realized that he kept an eye out for her, or noticed that she worried about his grades. It’s been a week, surely she’s not sick? Hibari-Senpai has been rougher than usual too.

—

It’s a month into the new school year, and it feels like he’s the only one who’s noticed that Sawada-Chan hasn’t shown up. Everyone else seems to be forgetting about her altogether, except Kurokawa-San. She occasionally glances at a particular empty desk and frowns.

—

Takeshi squints his eyes shut to hide his irritation, flashing a toothy grin. To be honest, it feels more like he’s baring his teeth. The baseball team is getting on his nerves. Before, he’d been able to work it out on the diamond, the sheer physicality and camaraderie of the team pulling together soothing him. But as the weeks drag on, it works less and less. The team favors him as a star player, but they seem to be pulling less of their own weight.

He tells himself he’s just being overly sensitive. This year has just been unusually stressful. Once he adjusts to middle school, it’ll get better.

(He glances at an empty desk, than away. He accidentally locks eyes with Kurokawa-San doing the same. Maybe he should see if she wants to talk.)

—-

Kurokawa-San seems to be the only other person who’s noticed that Sawada-Chan hasn’t been to school once. Even Sasagawa-Chan just brushes it off with a vague, “who? Oh, Dame-Tsuna! Do you think she had to go to another school for extra tutoring?” She’s nice about it, at least.

Kurokawa-San is surprised when he points out no one has seen her in town either.

“I didn’t think you paid her that much attention,” she stated. “Huh. I suppose even a monkey like you can tell what would happen if you asked her out.”

It’s not that. It’s just. He didn’t realize how much the glimpses of her had settled him down before. Right now it just feels someone is rubbing sandpaper on the inside of his skin. It’s not an unfamiliar feeling, it always happens over the summer. Usually it goes away when school starts up and he can play baseball. But baseball isn’t working like it usually does. Sawada-chan’s mysterious disappearance gives him something to focus on so he doesn’t use his bat like a shinai and makes the second string players run faster.

His dad would be upset if he did that.

—-

Takeshi realizes intellectually that he should be proud to be playing an away game in his first year of middle school, even with his less than stellar grades. He’s more distracted by imaging all the ways he could really hurt people. Kurokawa is helping, a little, ever since she noticed his struggle to keep his smile up.

“Stop pushing yourself around me, like some sort of stupid monkey,” she said bluntly. “I know you’re a wolf, try not to go rabid.”

He’s pretty sure people are starting to think they’re dating, the way he seeks her out. She mostly doesn’t care, and uses it as an excuse to get away with physically grounding him. The desperate rasping inside him is growing worse.

If this keeps up, they’re both worried he’s going to kill someone. And not even Hibari-senpai is paying enough attention to notice.

(She would have.)

—-

Takeshi whips his head around as they’re escorted to the sports field. Had that been, Sawada-Chan? What would she be doing here?

—

After the game, the coach lets them wander around the market a bit, as a reward for winning. Takeshi takes him up on it, managing to shed the usual hangers-on that he has after a game. The sandpaper and chisels that have been steadily working away inside his skin are joined by anxious jangling bells. He can’t figure out what’s wrong with him.

“Yamamoto-kun?” A familiar voice rings out, puzzled.

He turns and the bells go silent, the chisels drop away from his bones, and the sandpaper pauses. Sawada-Chan is staring at him, pale amber eyes meeting his properly for once, a cloth bag slung over her shoulder. Takeshi beams at her. Oh. So this is why Kurokawa called him a wolf.

“Sawada-Chan! How have you been? Kurokawa and I have missed you,” he comes up to talk to her without hesitation. He’s almost dizzy as whatever has been clawing at him finally quiets down.

—

Eventually, he manages to convince her invite him back her place. She leads him to an apartment, tossing him concerned looks from the corner of her eye. Takeshi feels something in him preen in pleasure. He’d never noticed her do that before, but the feeling is very familiar. She has worried about him, and not because of his baseball skills.

She looks good, her shoulders held back and her gaze steady. He had never noticed her eyes were so light before, almost the same shade as fossilized amber. She’d always had her head down before. Takeshi likes it.

“I texted Rika-Chan, she said it was alright to lend you her slippers,” Sawada-Chan pulled out a pair of guest shoes for him.

They were still a little stiff, but he was too distracted by how many pairs of shoes were tidily tucked into the shelves of cubbies by the door. While she’d been gone, she’d become close enough to a lot of people, close enough to have guest slippers. He ruthlessly suppressed the urge to mess them up. What if she got mad at him and threw him out? He wasn’t ready to face the noise yet.

—

Her apartment was small, but cozy. There was a beat up old kotatsu where she was putting some tea for him, and a faded couch. There were little touches everywhere that called to mind comfort. (He liked the amateur ink painting of a puppy of some kind, tripping over its paws chasing a ball.) Takeshi was seized by the desire to roll around the whole place and never leave. A plate of dumplings, lopsided and mismatched, found themselves next to the tea.

—

Eventually, he has to go, but he managed to spend several hours talking to Sawada-Chan. She’s bolder than she used to be, but still doesn’t say much. Takeshi is pleased with himself when he manages to get her to forget to be wary and snark back at him. She even let him take a nap on her couch while she did homework leaning against it.

No wonder she’s in Kunugigaoka now. He doesn’t even know where to start, and she’s flying through the worksheets.

—-

There’s a slim hand nudging his shoulder. It’s not Kurokawa, and it’s not his otusan. His hand snaps up, snake quick, to latch onto the wrist. He misses. It’s so unusual, that he actually pauses before remembering where he was.

“Oh, sorry, Sawada-Chan!” He grins desperately. “I didn’t recognize you!” Please don’t send him away. He doesn’t want to have her shrink away from him again. He doesn’t know what he’d do if she flinched from him. Kurokawa is getting better at genuinely not flinching, even when she gets cut by the edges he can’t hide anymore.

“It’s fine,” he almost collapses as she waves it off. “But the buses are going to stop running for the night, your otousan has already called you.”

—

He gets her number before he lets himself be ushered out the door, nearly running into her neighbor who eyes him suspiciously. Not even Takeshi’s best sheepish grin erases the unfriendly look in the man’s eyes. It, probably didn’t help that he was disheveled, and still smelled a bit sweaty from the baseball game earlier. It didn’t look good, a teenage boy walking out of girl’s apartment looking like that.

Takeshi avoided his gaze and hurried to the bus depot. His otousan had been pleased that the reason he’d gone missing was running into a friend and loosing track of time, and not something, else. But he’s heard the warning to make it back tonight, and so had Sawada-Chan. She’d all but thrown him out the door, tugging on a worn pair of running shoes to lead him to the bus depot in time to catch the last bus to Namimori.

As the bus tumbled into the night, he wonders when he can make time to come back again, and how many times it will take before his shoes have a space in her entrance.

[ushifiles]

╰ 3,020 words · ˚ ༘ ꒱ Beg? She thinks to herself through the haze of pleasure, sniffling so pathetically that she can even feel the smallest tendril of shame creeping in. Damn him, she has been begging for months. No one in their right mind would be playing the role of a housewife in all but name, wearing the shortest dresses known to man, and not have something they want to get. She wants him, always has and always will.

part two of dearest, darling, my universe ╱ alternate universe — no powers. female reader. third person. age gap ( sylus is in his late thirties, and reader is in her early twenties ). friends to lovers ( real, this time ). light angst. freak for freak dynamics. unnamed shitty ex for reader. sugar daddy dynamics, heavy power imbalance. masturbation. mentions of somnophilia, drugging. creampie. fingering. cockslapping. ( !! ) dubious consent + consensual non–consent, reader protests and sylus ignores / mocks her for it. domesticity as a kink. hints of predator and prey dynamics. sylus has a wife kink that reader is too willing to use against him. allusions to size difference where reader is smaller than sylus.

There is an ache, somewhere deep in his chest. A gnawing kind, enough that it makes his breath catch like something unyielding is stuck in his throat; it worsens to the point of making his ever-confident steps to falter. She is avoiding him, he would be far too stupid to not notice that. 

She is not even trying to hide it, and Sylus does not know if that is worse.

A pair, that is what they have always been. One plus one everywhere they go, someone jokes once, and they did not let go of that notion — never let it go since it had been first spoken within reach. The only time that it ever changed was when that stupid boy came into the picture, but he left, and for a year, all was well in Sylus’ world once more.

He had her in his vicinity once more, dancing around him, but closer. She lived in his home, wore clothes he bought for her, and swiped his black card with hesitation then with ease.

It was bliss, even more when he had her in his bed.

Drugged out of her wits, unconscious, but still greedy when it comes to sucking his cock deep inside of her pulsing wetness. Sylus did not just cum once or twice, thick ropes of his seed flooded her womb several times over, enough that when he pulled out, he was aching and sore. 

Something should have changed afterwards, even if she did not know of his violation. Something should have changed for the better, not for the worse — not this, never this.

He is confident that she does not know, chalks the ache of her cunt to a drunken rub that her little fingers did when she thought of him asleep. Many nights have passed like that after all, her breathy little whines and moans echoing through the microphone hidden behind her headboard. He had spent those times with a hand around his girth, pumping with every obscene squelch that her cunt makes. She does not know a thing, none the wiser of how much he already memorised every dip in her curves, the softness of her skin, and the scent that blooms when he bends her to his whim.

But she still pulls away, slowly, as if he is not looking at all times.

Sylus does not see red.

He sees black.

The tablet — that his money bought, the primal part of his soul whispers in delight — is snatched away from her fingers. It is with a sense of detachment that he watches how she startles, not having realised that he already arrived home from whatever his work is, and that bothers Sylus greatly. She is his good girl, his best and only girl, who was so attuned to his presence that he could never surprise her with his arrival before.

Before, but it seems, not anymore.

And oh, does that not just sting?

“You have been avoiding me,” a statement and not a question; the way he speaks betrays the severity of the situation, Sylus is never formal with her — always slurring words in an accent that exists only to him and contractions of his own that would never make sense to anyone else. “Did you think of me to be so stupid as to not notice?”

That right there, that is the question. Albeit, a rhetorical one. Even in his deepest hurt, he still tries to ensnare her in a trap, box her in a corner with nothing else to do but speak. It feels like if he does not, then he will lose her. He will lose her and never get her back, not like in the past where all it took was paying a pretty dumb thing to go crazy on her drunk boyfriend. If he loses her this time, he fears that he will never get her back. It feels like it will be permanent this time.

She looks at him, wide-eyed and surprised. Sylus does not miss the tremble in her gaze, how it flickers to the side in an attempt to not meet his eyes. He cannot lose her. It is desperation that makes him reach out, ever gentle when his hand cradles her cheek.

“Why?” A question that is more of a plea for understanding, for clarity.

Silence takes hold, and it feels like a noose tightening around his neck with every second that passes and she does not speak. 

A shuddering breath from lips that tasted sweet as ambrosia, more succulent than the ripest of fruits. “I’ve been taking advantage of your kindness,” she whispers in a voice that sounds near tears, pearl-like droplets trickling down her cheeks to land on his hand like boiling water. “It’s not r-right, you take care of me so well, and I don’t even do anything to contribute to this house.”

He wants to laugh, to cry, and call her a silly girl for worrying over it. Not once has she ever taken advantage of him, when all that he gave her were things that he gave freely. But her tears make him stop, the ache in his chest swelling to monstrous proportions that it nearly threatens to swallow him whole. “I-I don’t want to depend on you so much,” but I want you to, “let me do something— anything, please. I don’t want to be a-a burden to you.”

You could never be one, Sylus wants to bare his teeth in a snarl and insist. You can spend the rest of your days attempting to empty my bank accounts, lay on my couch— my bed, and I would be happier for it. 

This is a fight that he will not win, he knows that much.

Sylus has always been weak to those eyes of hers, that glassy shine that makes him feel so utterly human.

“Whatever you want,” he whispers, tilting her face to press a kiss to her forehead — feeling so fucking grateful that she lets him and does not pull away. “Anything that you want, my darling. Anything at all.”

They do not return to the comfort of the before, but the tension that hung in their home begins to dissipate. Baby steps, Sylus whispers to himself when she gives him a shy smile when her eyes catch his, standing before the stove as she has been doing for a few weeks now.

He does not intrude, only returning her smile with one of his own.

She begins to run around the house like a little wife, his little wife, and he feels utterly pleased by that thought; even if a part of him remains seething at how she keeps her distance.

On the bright side, the one that he chooses to look at, they establish a routine of their own in this change. His return home is always welcomed with a chirp from the kitchen and the scent of something delicious permeating the air. She goes to him within minutes, warmth in her eyes and a skip in her step. Her hand takes his briefcase and sets it aside, reaching for his tie to loosen the knot before making him sit on the couch — a glass of scotch already awaiting by the coffee table.

The pitter-patter of her delicate heels echo, her perfume filling his lungs when she walks away, and something in Sylus begins to ease.

Right here, this is where home is.

All relationships have their ups and downs, and while they remain in the vague territory of friendship, they are no different. It does not escape his notice how the further their routine becomes solidified in the foundation of their lives, the more domestic it becomes.

He does not speak of it, and neither does she, even as the weeks turn to months and her dresses become shorter and shorter under the frilly white apron that she seems so fond of. On the downside, Sylus has to keep making excuses for the amount of times he retreats to the privacy of his bedroom throughout the day.

The moment the door closes, his hand will always be wrapped around the steadily hardening girth of his cock. He rarely bothers to push his pants down, opting to just pull himself out and give it punishing strokes to bring the edge off.

It never works, even as his cum spurts so soon with his brain reeling from the images of her.

Pure torture, that is what it is.

Until it is suddenly not, his control fucking snaps one day when she bends in front of the oven — clad in nothing but her short fucking black dress and that fucking frilly apron. His mouth turns dry, and everything becomes a blur from how fast he prowls to her like a predator would to prey.

She is barely upright before Sylus has an arm wrapped around her waist and his other hand on her face, covering her mouth and nose, as he all but drags her struggling and screaming form to force her to bend over the dining table. It is so cute how she tries to resist, to flail and fight against him like her weak limbs can do anything. It is nothing short of adorable how she tries to scream her protests, her curses, and her pleas that come out muffled beneath his palm.

He should have done this earlier, Sylus thinks to himself. He should not have used the drug and just fucked her to the mattress, held her down when she woke, because her resistance is so delicious.

“No?” A breathless laugh to the back of her ear, tongue flicking out to lick the lobe at the same time the hand around her waist dips underneath the skirt to pinch her thigh. When she jumps and a squeak escapes her lips in surprise at the flash of pain, he becomes lightheaded from how quickly his blood travelled south. “If you really didn’t want this, then you should be wearing your pretty panties.”

Even his words do nothing to stave off his arousal, when the mere utterance of her undergarments make his spine tingle with pleasure at the memory of personally buying each piece of clothing that touches her skin.

Only the best for his perfect girl, after all.

“But you’re not,” Sylus continues, letting his hand travel higher at the same time he releases her mouth to press her head down the table. He keeps her pinned down as he dips thick digits between the seam of her cunt, smearing her arousal all over her mound before bringing it to his lips.

An obscene suck, the taste of her perfect pussy blooms in his tongue.

His schemes, his plans, all of them fly out the window alongside his self-control.

Still holding her down, he flips her skirt up and pushes down his pants. It has barely dropped to his knees before the head is already pressing to her clit in a mimicry of a peck. He slaps the nub with the tip of his cock a few times, delighting at the panicked way that she squirms and babbles pleas that he does not bother hearing.

It feels like he is underwater, all of his focus trained on her sopping wet cunt and his cock mere centimetres away. Is it even a surprise when Sylus begins to push in?

Her cries increase in volume, but he does not care, not when she gets wetter and wetter at the same time. “Dirty girl,” he laughs underneath all her begging, watching in fascination as her arousal coats his thickness so thoroughly and then drips some strings of it down the floor of their kitchen. “You like this, don’t you?” Another push, her walls clenching in response. “Dirty girls like you like to be forced to take cock. Oh, baby.”

Pressed to the hilt, he stays there just to bask in the warmth that he missed.

For her, this will be their first time together. But for Sylus? This will be their second, and it will not be the last, not when it feels infinitely better to have her cunt while she is awake. It feels so fucking good to feel her struggle at first, then for all her protests to slowly melt away with each press deeper.

“You’re so fucking perfect for me.”

Her pussy positively throbs around Sylus, breaths coming out pitched while crying her little heart out.

This position is so reminiscent of the time he took her savagely, thinking that she had been drugged to her wits, in her bed too. Their first time together is memorable, she can admit that much. But not having to hide all the sounds that creep from her throat and her body’s reaction to him is infinitely so much better.

She feels so exposed like this, bent over the table they have been taking their meals together for over a year now. A small sniffle comes pitifully bubbling out of her lips, tasting the salt of her crocodile tears, and clenches even tighter around him. “M-Mercy,” she begs sweetly, pretending like her hips are not rocking back and forth on his cock, moving all on her own without even a bit of his help. She can feel his amusement at her continued protests, how he twitches inside of her, and has to warble her voice in the following cry to hide how she wants to moan at finally having him where she wants him.

His hand moves from the back of her skull to press between the blades of her shoulder, an unrelenting pressure that makes her gasp and spasm around his girth. “Mercy? Hm,” his voice trails off at the same time he pulls out, until only the tip is left and she weeps at the loss — unable to hide her need for him any longer.

“Maybe if you beg nicely for me, darling.”

Beg? She thinks to herself through the haze of pleasure, sniffling so pathetically that she can even feel the smallest tendril of shame creeping in. Damn him, she has been begging for months. No one in their right mind would be playing the role of a housewife in all but name, wearing the shortest dresses known to man, and not have something they want to get.

She wants him, always has and always will.

The masks have fallen, all of her is bared to all of him — primal and rotten to the very core. Soulmates, she thinks hysterically to herself. What a perfect match they make. She has always been greedy, always wanting more, always needing more. Yet, for all of her faults, he indulges her again and again, how can she not fall for him? Sylus is the only one who can ever have her, she has vowed this to her heart all those months ago, when his door opened and she immediately found herself swept in his arms like nothing ever changed between them. Sylus is the only one that she will ever have, the only one she will allow to have her.

It is Sylus or nothing.

“Please,” she breathes out, desperate to have him back and clenching around the sensitive head. “P-Please make me your wife.” There it is, her heart’s wish laid bare. She whines, tries to weakly raise her hips and push him back inside to the emptiness in her cunt.

For a moment, all is still, like even the very air is watching with bated breath. She tries not to panic, he is still pressed to her, even if he remains unmoving. Her tears are renewed, no longer playing a role, but feeling wounded at the thought of being rejected after all this time. Her heart skips a beat, not in the way that romance novels talk about, but one of tragedy. She hitches a breath, whimpering to herself and tries to squirm away, put some distance between them—

Only to scream when Sylus shoves his cock back inside the velvety depths in an almost violent press of his hips to her behind.

It feels so intense, too much and too fast that her head nearly spins from the sudden onslaught of pleasure assaulting all of her senses. Earlier wish for mercy is granted when he does not wait for her to adjust, settling into a pace that nudges that tender spot deep inside every time that he presses back inside. The edge of the table digs into her skin, making her teeth chatter with every little “ah, ah, ah” that escapes. Mercy is when he folds his body on top of her, his chest to her spine, like he cannot bear the thought of having space between their bodies now that he finally knows the truth.

Mercy is when he reaches down, pinching her clit and tapping it insistently like his cock is not stirring her very guts to the point that she can feel him in her throat.

She hears nothing but the sound of his grunts, his praise, and the slap of skin-on-skin.

At some point, she must have reached her high before blacking out, because the next thing that she knows is that she is on her back, the mattress soft but already drenched in fluids, with Sylus still inside her cunt — her very tender cunt that is practically oozing cum from how much he filled her.

“It’s okay,” the man coos sweetly, reaching a heavy palm to press against the bulge in her belly that is in the shape of his cock. “My little wife should go back to sleep and let her husband fill her up, hm?” It feels like a threat, a promise that only he is privy to its true meaning. 

She wants to protest, but she feels so warm all over, from his presence and the warmth of his cum inside of her. Everything feels so muddled, like she is wading deep in a pool of thick syrup from all of his love pouring into her; exhausted eyes close once more, and she feels him press a kiss to her sternum.

“That's my perfect girl.”

© ushifiles ( 2024 ): do not claim, modify, copy or repost my works without permission. minors do not interact.

[your-hockey-mom]

Christmas with Quinny?

"Hey! No peeking!"

"I...wasn't!" Quinn smirked, putting his hands behind his back after getting caught looking into the gift bags sitting on the coffee table. He had been getting antsy about opening gifts with you since he had gotten up. Sometimes he could be a big kid and during the holidays it was so much worse. Good thing he was cute, you always teased.

"You were, too!" You laughed, approaching him, two mugs of steaming hot chocolate in your hands. "Go ahead and open it, if you want! I'm ready."

Quinn would let you take a seat beside him before handing you a small box he had hidden beneath a blanket next to him. As soon as you saw the colour of the box you knew where it had come from. That trademark blue could only mean one thing: Tiffany's!

"Quinn, you didn't!" You didn't know what else to say!

"I may have. I hope it's okay."

Taking the box, you give Quinn a kiss as thanks before seeing just what was inside. "I'm sure you really outdid yourself! I didn't need anything like this!"

"Sure you did," he replied, taking a careful sip of the hot chocolate.

Inside, was a gold ring in a cursive script that read "love". It was dainty, classic, and so very touching. When had he had the time to get you such a gift, you had no idea but words could not express how much it meant to you.

"I love this so much!" You choked out, putting it on your middle finger. "Quinny, thank you so much!"

"You're welcome. I just wanted to get you something you could enjoy everyday." He was smiling like a kid whose mother had put his best artwork on the fridge. Things like jewelry wasn't his forte in buying, and he couldn't lie: he had help from the girls at Tiffany's in picking it out. His mom had actually suggested the famous jeweler when Quinn had confessed he didn't know what to get you. He had picked out some little things like a book or two, but in terms of the big, memorable, post-on-Instagram sort of gift, that's where he had struggled.

"Oh, I'll absolutely wear this everyday! I've never gotten anything from Tiffany's before!"

"Well, I'm glad I was able to get you something new." Quinn scooted closer, pulling your face to his. "Maybe I'll make a tradition of it?"

The kiss was long and passionate. Such a romantic Quinn had turned out to be and you loved being the center of his ever affection. His hands held you tightly, not letting you leave his side until he was for certain that he had expressed just how much he loved you. The ring truly had meaning.

"I have something for you, but not as nice as this, lemme go get it!"

Quinn slowly withdrew his hands, his fingertips trailing against your body as you got up. "If you have you."

"There's no need to pout! I'll be right back!" You headed to the hall closet where way in the back were two wrapped hockey sticks hidden as far back as you could get them. The had been a custom order to the specs of his on-ice sticks, but these had the Canucks colorway elements and a little message engraved where normally his name would go. You didn't care if he used them even once, but what hockey player couldn't use more sticks?

"How did you wrap those?" Quinn asked, arms outstretched to take them from you. "That's impressive!"

"Well, I think I used a whole roll of paper because it was not going well!"

Carefully, Quinn unwrapped the dual-packaged gift and smiled. It was like he had ordered them himself. Now, you had had some help; making a couple phone calls to teammates to snap a picture of his stick specs so you could get them just right. They had to be perfect!

"'Nobody puts my baby in the box!' You're too cute! Thanks, sweetheart." You had thought a long time about what you wanted to have put on the stick shaft. What better than what you always yelled when Quinn was sent to the "pretty boy box" as you affectionately called the penalty box.

"I thought it was pretty fitting," you giggled, excited that he hadn't found the message too cringe.

"They're perfect! Thanks, babe." His smile was so sweet, and his eyes sparkled within the twinkling of the Christmas tree. "I love you."

"I love you, too!" You pulled yourself into his lap. "Should we open the other stuff?"

"Later, right now I just want to enjoy you." Quinn buried his face in your neck as you laughed against the feeling of his facial hair against your skin. An hour would pass before you left the sofa, or maybe it was two... 

[lunajay33]

Wrong Outcome

•🖤🦇🪻•

Summary: You’ve been with Cassian since well forever, being Rhysands sister you met him young and have been inseparable, you find out you’re pregnant but he chooses Nesta, but when you dissapear he realizes he made a mistake

Pairing: Cassian x f!reader

•Masterlist•

Everything was exactly how I wanted it, my brother was finally home, my two bestfriends, Azriel and Mor, and the man I’ve always loved, he treated me like I was the center of his world but then things changed, Feyre came along and then shortly after her sisters and suddenly Nesta was all Cas cared about

He slowly stopped staying with me at night, started missing out every Saturday dates that we’ve had since well forever, and now I can barely get a word out of him without his attention being completely on her and what’s worse is that she’s so cruel to me

I sighed waking up in my empty bed that use to be warmed by Cassian, I’m wearing an over sized shirt and my hair is raggedy and my face swollen and blotchy from crying, I drag myself to Rhysands office where he’d be early in the mornings

I slumped down in the chair across from him biting nervously on my lip

“Woah sis you’re not looking so good” he said putting his work aside and coming to sit next to me

“Why does he love her so much but not me, did I do something, what does she have that I don’t” I sigh as the tears continue to stream

“Oh my little star it’s not you he’s just a block head, he’ll realize what he’s missing” he said pushing my head back

“But I don’t want him to realize I’m the one after he’s tried out with someone else, he barely even looks at me anymore”

“I wish I could take your pain away”

“Why can’t I have a love like yours and Feyres”

Before he could answer I got up and dragged myself back through the living room on my way to the kitchen seeing Nesta and Cassian sat on the couch a little too close

“Looking a little pudgy lately don’t you think” Nesta laughed and she pointed at my belly, I’ve only recently noticed but I’ve barely eaten enough to gain that much weight, I wrap my arms around my self noticing Azriel come up behind me and lead me to his room

“It’s like living with an evil spirit” he groans as he sets me down on his bed

“Can you take me away, just drop me off at the family cabin or anywhere I just…….i can’t be here anymore Az……please” he nods reassuringly

I pack a bag and load up some food for my time away before he wishes me away

“Are you sure you’ll be okay here?” He asks gently squeezing my arms

“Maybe just check up on me once in a while, just don’t tell the others except Rhys okay”

“Okay”

•

The days dragged on into weeks into months and quickly I found out in pregnant, it was heart breaking at first realizing the man of my dreams doesn’t even want me anymore let alone a baby, but after some talking with Azriel I realized it was a gift, to be able to have a little bundle of joy and he’d be there for me every step of the way

As I got closer to my due date Azriel convinced me to come home so I wasn’t alone during birth, I hear a knock at the door and it Azriel as I open the door

“Ready to come home Angel?”

“As long as you’re by my side” I smile as I thread my arm through his

We were back in the family home and my heart started picking up

“I’m nervous” I whisper as I turn into Az

“It’ll be okay” we walk into the living room where everyone is and they all turn to us, ending all conversation

“My little star you’re…….youre pregnant?” Rhys asks as he shoots up from his chair and comes over rubbing my belly

I nod knowing how excited he’d be it killed me to keep it a secret from him

Azriel and I sat down at the dining table seeing how everyone had so many questions

“Where have you been?” Mor breaks the silence

“I needed to get away” I glance over at Cassian and Nesta

“Is it Azriels?” Cassian asks worry written all over his face, sometimes I wish it was Azriel with how well he treats me

“No” I say squeezing his hand under the table

“Then who’s?” Elain speaks up

“It doesn’t matter anymore”

The room fell silent

“It’s mine isn’t it” Cassian sighed looking like a lost puppy

I silently nodded looking down at my lap, I hear the chair screech back heavy footsteps walking my way before I’m pulled up and being dragged away

“What are you doing you can’t just ignore me when Nesta comes along and think you can just push me around now” I groan as I push him away when we get far enough away from the living room

“Listen please, I’m sorry I didn’t treat you right, it’s just I felt something when I was with her but then I realized it was only because that reserved part of her reminded me of you when Rhys first introduced us, and that I’ve been ignore you and then you were gone and I felt it in my chest…..you’re my mate” his words took my breath away

“Really? You’re not lying to me”

“Of course not, I love you and I made a mistake please give me another chance” he was practically begging now

“Okay but….youre going to have to make it up to me, I’m talking about a lot of sweets”

“Anything I’ll always do anything for you”

•

It’s been a month since I came back and a few days after I gave birth to the cutest little girl she had purple eyes and dark brown hair with tiny wings and Cassian has been doing alot of reperations and got quite a talking from Azriel and Rhys but I’m just glad things are back to how I always imagined

[08melancholie]

Amos and Micah's Relationship; The Letter.

I had a quick interaction on twitter about Amos's letter to Micah and GOD, we need to talk about it a little more in-depth, because I am so insane about their relationship.

If you aren't aware, Micah has a brother; Amos Bell. You can find a letter sent back by his brother in response to whatever Micah has written him, which is the following:

You can immediately feel the disdain from Amos to Micah; bluntly threatening him, telling him he wants nothing to do with Micah, etc. and that simply breaks my heart for Micah in the worst way possible. Micah wanted a relationship with his brother, and because of his poor lifestyle, it was all too late, and a relationship of any kind, or reconciling, was out of the question now.

This circles back to their father, of course, Micah Bell II. I feel that blaming him here is justified; but the case is so for a lot of things Micah does/says too. I've talked about how I think that, if Micah got out of the crime lifestyle that he led with his father—like Amos did—he would have had a somewhat normal rest of his life. If you've ever been in this type of situation, being influenced or coerced into something by any authority figure, or even any person in general, you'll know that traditions, opinions and views stick for a long time, and they don't fade out so easily, even after you don't have those people preaching those beliefs to you anymore. Micah could have gotten out no problem, but the next issue would have been getting what his father taught him out of his head. It clearly didn't fade canonically, seeing as he quotes things his father's told him; "Sympathy is for the weak", for example. He quotes it at the fire, saying it's 'one of the thing his daddy's taught him'. I think that, in either scenario, Micah would have been doomed, and that is even worse to me than his current situation.

I'm always curious as to what Micah could have possibly written in that letter. The most hurtful one for me might be knowing Amos has daughters, and that he's an uncle that the girls will never meet, or even know of, probably. Maybe Micah wanted to reconcile to meet them? Can you imagine, if Micah wanted to be an uncle? I think that wouldn't be so out of character, seeing as he never settled and therefore never had any family left other than Amos, so knowing he had nieces might have driven him to write to Amos. And that alone really makes me feel bad, as much as I don't want to feel bad for Micah—I really, really do. Micah wanted a relationship with his brother—and maybe his brother's family—but it could have never been, because of what he 'chose' in his life.

oh boy i am very sad about them :(

[fizzie-frog]

Blitzø: core self, trauma and healing (part two)

This is a continuation of my previous post. Thanks to Tumblr limitations, I had to split it into different parts (trust me, I wish I could've made it just one big post).

PART ONE

This might be long...

He tried to waddle through the trauma of existing as someone as self-loathing as himself.

He denied;

“I didn’t do anything, it was an accident!”

He isolated;

He minimized, often with humour;

“Uh-oh, looks like it sucked all the fun outta you!”

He avoided being vulnerable;

“I DID CARE!”

And felt awkward/uncomfortable when he did end up spilling out his emotions;

“Weeeeeeeell, fuck you!”

Suppressed his emotions;

… Cause they’re blinding and suffocating, and it’s easier to avoid them.

He hated himself and didn’t believe there is anything good about him, despite having changed lives for the better;

And he dipped if he got too close (everything literally burnt down when he tried getting closer, didn’t it);

He often didn’t believe others would hold any endearment for him, even taking it as a joke;

“I destroy everything, everyo— I make everyone’s lives worse!”

And that’s it, really. He believes he’s a pest, a virus, something that can only do harm. While his core self still showed itself from time to time, he was blinded with the trauma of all his wrongdoings. All the people he’s hurt and that, in a self-fulfilling prophecy, made him hurt even more.

Everything he couldn’t look straight in the eye. The death of his mother, caused by him. The hurt of his friend, caused by him. The hurt he’s caused around himself. He couldn’t bear see it, knowing it would break him down. That’s why he avoided it. Thinking about what happened, what he did is suffocating. But that also blinded him from seeing his good deeds too. As usual, we’re more likely to see the negative over the positive.

Blitz picked himself up by the bootstraps as they say, but it didn’t help him, not within himself. So what did help?

I think it started in Oops…

He didn’t wanna be vulnerable, but after so much hurt and things left unsaid, it spilled. It all spilled out and made him into a crying mess right in front of Fizz, cause as much as he tried to act unbothered, he did care (as he said in the episode). He was vulnerable, he explained to Fizz exactly what happened instead of holding it in anymore, he apologized to Fizz. They both learnt what happened.

And the kicker? It paid off! Blitz was finally vulnerable to someone, his former best friend, and Fizz forgave him. He got his dear friend back for this. Not only did he win someone he loves back, but also this came as a punch to those unhealthy beliefs, cause he was vulnerable and it didn’t turn out bad.

We have Ghostfuckers.

After being plagued by his memories, Millie came to his aid. She not only reminded him of a time he actually changed her life for the better, but also confirmed that he indeed cares for Blitz.

Then the moment of truth…

Can’t get anymore raw than the moment when his death was imminent. It’s often in times like this that we people’s raw emotions.

In a moment when even Loona was tearing up at the thought of losing Blitz. When all his friends were already mourning him, crying for him as he was about to lose his life.

And in that moment, when he was sure he was gonna die, he could finally say it…

“I love you, guys”

There was nothing to be lost. He was gonna die and the last thing he knew was that his friends were crying for him, but were safe. He could die happy.

Of course though, he didn’t, as we know. Once he was outside the court room, he was pulled in a sobbing hug by his friends and daughter that were relieved he was okay. Even further proof of being loved. Despite the horrible circumstances, it must be so healing to his heart to have that.

True, unfiltered confirmation of being loved. He is loved. The possibility of someone you love dying shakes you. Loona realized it wasn’t worth pretending anymore - life is so short, especially for low class hellborns.

And probably so did Blitz. He was finally in a happy place. His daughter loved him, his friends loved him. Stolas loved him.

He is loved.

So in the Sinsmas episode, we started seeing so much more of who he once was.

He was goofy,

Attentive,

Listening,

Supportive,

Cheerful,

Encouraging,

Patient,

He looked at potential future,

He was selfless,

Protective,

Kind,

Even romantic.

And he was happy…

That’s not to say he’s completely healed. I think you can never truly heal from something like this, especially the magnitude of what Blitz went through in his life, and his issues can resurface.

But at this point in time, he’s finally in a happy place. He was affirmed, comforted and reassured. He’s content, and that’s the most healed he can be.

His core self is finally seeing the light of day. He is more himself than he’s ever been since that day.

So that was it. I’m sorry if I was a bit messy some places; as mentioned, life is kind of a struggle. Sometimes I feel like my brain is deteriorating or something, lmao, but I wanted to put this together cause I feel like Blitz has such a good, painfully relatable (to me anyway) arc and he’s such a complex character.

My love for Fizz remains the biggest, but I couldn’t deny the love I have for Blitz. He’s just such a good character with such good development. Selfish yet selfless, careful yet careless… So many dimensions.

If you made it this far, thank you! <3

[darlingsfandom]

She’s Got A Secret !

anon: L'I have a request to make about Neil, where the reader is his stepmother, she was cleaning his room, she notices that there are porn DVDs of her young, when she was a porn star, and talk to him and the rest will be a porno (obviously reader is dom and Neil is the sub)

Summary: Neil sets up his stepmom because he found out her secret and he plays along like he didn’t know.

TW: Stepcest! Swearing, Fem Dom! Age Gap.

AN: This is 100% fantasy/fiction! In no way do I condone Stepcest! This was requested .

Pairing: Older Fem Dom Reader x Older Sub Neil!

Reader is in her early 40s x Neil is 25!

This had to be a bad joke or something! There was no way your eyes were actually seeing what was in front of you. You bit your bottom lip as you held the DVD in your hand before placing it back where you found it. Your heart dropped a little before you sighed. Neil was your stepson, yes he’s old enough to be out on his own but he’s having a hard time with that and he does help around the house and when his father is out he’s extra handy around the house. He’s a sweet boy, funny and cute but after finding the dvd you started in along with an old magazine where you were the center fold in his room… it’s hard to see him in a certain light.

You didn’t mean to find any of it, you were just in there to put his laundry away when you see it sitting on the ground which was weird since Neil always took good care of his movies so you had it mind to do something nice and pick it up only to discover what it was.

“y/n?!” Neil yelled as he walked in the front door with the bags of groceries. You quickly picked up the laundry basket and carried it on your hip as you came downstairs to meet him in the kitchen.

“Neil.” You smiled softly before setting the basket back in the laundry room.

“Are you okay ? You look like you’ve seen a ghost.” He laughed as he put away the groceries.

“Yeah yeah fine.” You waved your hand with a little laugh before you became aware of how much he was actually looking at you. You swallowed the lump in your throat. If you wanted things to go back to normal you had to tell him, it’s not like he’s your birth son and he’s twenty five for crying out loud. You ran your hands over your stomach before you opened your mouth to speak but the words got stuck.

“Are you sure you’re okay?” Neil asked putting his hand on your shoulder.

“I found your porn stash!” You blurted out before covering your mouth with your hand. Neil’s cheeks turned deep red as his eyes went wide and he rubbed the back of his neck. “I didn’t mean too! I was putting your laundry away and seen a movie on the floor! You care so much about movies so I thought I’d pick it up and then I seen what it was and …”

“Oh god!” He rubbed his face with his hands.

“Sweetie, I got even worse news though…” you put your hands on his shoulders. Neil looked into your eyes before he finally spoke up.

“What? It’s not like it really could be worse unless you’re about to tell me you’re the girl in the video I’ve been mast…” His words stopped when he realized how your face went soft. “I’ve been watching my stepmoms porno..” he had mixed emotions.

“Short answer, yes you have…” you cupped his face.

“Fuck! Wait how do I know you’re not just messing with me?” Neil stepped back and you tilted your head before you turned your back to him, pulled down the top of your shorts and showed him the little flower trampstamp you had. His eyes went wide. Neil had fantasies about that tattoo and came so many times on his fist thinking of it and the girl who made such pretty sounds.

“Think I’m still messing with you?” You asked over your shoulder before he walked away and sat down on the couch. Neil ran his hands over his face again before slapping his thighs and just his luck , he had a hard on. “I know this is weird Neil, but things don’t have to be weird.” You sat down next to him and grabbed his hand.

“How? How did you do porn?” He stumbled a little which made you laugh.

“It’s a little weird to explain but all you need to know is, I had fun, I made decent money and clearly I’m pretty good since my own stepson liked it so much!” You teased him making Neil blush before he groaned.

“Did… do you still make porn?” Neil was curious.

“Now? No im too old honey .”

“That’s not true! You’d be a milf!”

“MILF?” You tilted your head slightly in confusion.

“Mom I’d love to fuck..”

Neil bit his bottom lip as he looked you up and down making you feel something you haven’t in awhile. Sure your husband fucked you but it never last long and you often had to think of someone else to get off. Neil interrupted your thighs by squeezing your arm. You shook your head before leaning back against the couch and biting your own lip back at him.

“Can I see your tits now? Do you still have a bush? Do you..”

“Neil!” You chuckled making him lean in closer giving you puppy dog eyes. “If I show you, don’t tell anyone!” Neil nodded eagerly before you grabbed the bottom of your shirt and took off the fabric to show Neil your tits. His jaw dropped.

“They’re so pretty! Just like in the video.” He reached forward and grabbed both of them gently before he started massaging them.

“Neil.. you shouldn’t be… we shouldn’t be…”

“Please! I’ll be a good boy for you.” He pouted his bottom lip and how could you say no! You’re both adults and what Neil didn’t know is that you were in the middle of divorcing his father but that’s for you to know.

You watched Neil carefully as he massaged your tits. Neil couldn’t hold back and quickly sucked your right nipple into his mouth making you gasp. He looked up at you with soft eyes while sucking your tit. He readjusted himself so that his hips were pushing into yours as he put himself in your lap so he could push his face further into your boobs while sucking your nipples. Your fingers twirled in his hair , your arousal was pooling in your panties while Neil pushed his clothes hard on against your cunt.

“You never answered my question … do you still have a bush… mommy?” Neil smirked as he licked a sting of spit up your nipple before pulling back and looking down at your lap.

“Mommy? That’s the first time you’ve ever called me that pretty boy. Is it because you want to fuck me so bad ?” You ran your finger under his chin and Neil could’ve came right then and there. You stood up, pulled down your shorts and laid back on the couch with your pussy on display but still had your panties on so Neil could see the wet patch. Before you could even form a sentence Neil had his face buried against the wet patch, desperately licking at it. “Fuck Neil , eager boy for mommy.” You teased.

Neil rubbed his face against your cunt before pulling back, hooking his fingers into the side of your panties and yanked off the fabric before his jaw dropped.

“Oh my fucking god. Such a pretty bush! Fuck! Can’t wait to eat it “Neil licked his lips.

“Yeah? Then fucking eat my cunt!” You pushed his head down and shoved your cunt into his face. Neil wrapped his arms around your thighs as he licked at your cunt. Neil knew what he was doing, he watched videos enough to know what got you going. “That’s right baby, eat mommy’s wet cunt like a good boy!” Your hips fucked forward as Neil hummed happily , his tongue licking as fast as you could to taste every inch. “Fuck!! Mommy’s good boy” you gritted your teeth as he desperately swirled his tongue into your pussy.

Neil was in heaven! He’s often dreamed about this and not just because of the video , now that he’s knows it’s you in the video, the videos have became ten thousand times hotter. Neil was so busy eating your cunt he didn’t even realize how bad the head of his cock was leaking in his boxers. He tapped your thighs and you pulled away to look down at him.

“Are you okay baby boy?” You asked. Neil nodded quickly before he stood up to pull off his pants. A soft sigh left his lips when he felt his cock spring free. “Oh honey, look at you, your poor little cock.” You wrapped your hand around his stiff cock. To be fair Neil’s cock was bigger than his father’s and had the girth you’ve wanted.

“Hurts mommy!” He gave you a soft pout.

“I bet it does, poor baby. Since I now know what you’ve been watching….” Your fingers slide up and down the veins on Neil’s cock making him whimper. You swiped your index through the pre-cum leaking and licked it off making Neil watch in awe. “I know you won’t mind if I use you for my pleasure.” You pushed Neil back on the couch, climbed onto his lap and gripped his shoulders. “But do you want this Neil ? Because we can stop.”

Neil placed his hands on your hips, pulled you down and looked into your eyes.

“I’ve never wanted anything more.” He kissed you with softness and passion. Your head was spinning at this kiss before you pulled away to see a goofy little smile on his lips. You adjusted yourself so your folds were against his cock and slowly rubbed against his cock. He sighed happily as you used him for pleasure.

You stopped suddenly before lifting your hips to hold his cock and slowly slide down on it. Your mouth hung open as his cock filled you up. You sank all the way down before allowing yourself to get comfortable. Neil was already panting since you were squeezing his cock.

“Mommy! Your cunt feels so good!” Neil praised as he laid below you.

Your lips curved into a smirk before you started bouncing up and down on his cock. Your hands rested on his chest while you bounced on his cock. The sounds of your wetness echoed throughout the room and Neil was whimpering below you, mumbling little praises of how good it feels, how amazing you are, how your moans are sinful! Both of you were panting like crazy as you dug your nails into his chest as you started to ride his cock back and forth.

“Fuck! So much better than my ex girlfriend mommy!”

“That’s right baby! Mommy knows what you need.” You kissed him while he laid there enjoying this new pleasure.

“Please let me fuck you mommy!” Neil was begging you.

“Not now baby, you’re mommy’s good little bitch right now.” You squeezed his cheeks together and Neil could’ve came right then and there again.

“Say it again mommy! I’m going to cum!” Neil was on the verge of tears.

“Aww does mommy’s little bitch need to cum? Hmm need to make a mess do you?” You swiveled your hips on his cock in a way that he’s never felt.

“Fuck please mommy! Yes I’m your little bitch!” Neil was digging his nails into your side so he wouldn’t cum.

You slowly pulled off and looked down at his wet cock. Your hand wrapped around it tightly before you got on your knees and pumped his cock.

“Say it baby, say you’re my little bitch so you can be a good boy and cum.” You smacked the head of his cock before spitting on it.

“Mommy!” Neil was a blubbering mess full of pleasure about to burst.

“Come on sweetheart, use your words.” You smacked his cock again before kissing the tip.

“Fuck! I’m your little bitch! Fuck I’m..” and before he could finish Neil exploded with cum. His cock was aching as the creamy liquid shot out onto your breasts making you gasp.

“What a good boy! Yeah mommy’s good little bitch!” You praised Neil as he squirmed and whined as he finished shooting his load against your breasts. “Now come here and lick my fucking cunt until I squirt.” You barely gave Neil a second before he was on his knees and you were on the couch with your legs spread. Your fingers ran through his cum on your breasts and you sucked them clean as Neil devoured your cunt like a starved man.

“Fuck! That’s it! Eat my fucking cunt!” You argue your back and Neil used his two fingers to slide into you which made you groan in pleasure. He had good fingering skills as well as pussy eating skills. His tongue lapped faster as you laid there enjoying the pleasure he was giving you. “Neil! That’s it! What a good boy!” Neil moaned into your cunt as you pushed his head closer and held your hand on the back of his head as you felt your orgasm building fast.

Your orgasm was on the brink and when Neil started rubbing his nose against your clit, that was it.

“Neil! Fuck! I’m cumming!” You cried out as the climax gushed out of you soaking his face. Neil desperately tried to lick up all the squirt as it splashed him. He was beyond desperate for it, everyone time he watched you squirt on the video he always imagined how it would taste and now he’s actually tasting you. Neil licked his lips as your body went limp on the couch.

“You really are good boy Neil.” You singled him back up and he stood up, grabbed your hand as he sat down next you and laid his head on your shoulder. Your fingers went through the cum on your chest and brought them to his lips. Neil slowly wrapped his mouth around your fingers and sucked gently while you used another finger to taste his cum yourself. Neil let go of your fingers with a pop before he wrapped an arm around your waist.

“Am I the best boy?” He sounded so sweet.

“Yes sweetheart, the best boy! Now I know you want to cuddle but it’s probably best we get cleaned up first.” He nodded quickly before getting up to start a shower.

“Oh and Neil, don’t tell anyone about the movie.” You raised any eyebrow at him while he nodded and smiled. He thanked whatever lucky stars he had because his plan worked after all.

[wulfdreaded]

"you're  overestimatin'  how  many  of  my  kind  are  still  out  there.  not  all  of  them  get  the  treatment  little  rory  does."  none  of  them,  actually.  he  bit  them,  the  turned  them,  he  let  them  loose  to  wreak  havoc.  sometimes  he  stayed  around  to  watch.  the  one  time  before  rory  that  zeke  actually  stuck  around  to  someone  he  turned...  didn't  go  well.  not  because  of  zeke  sticking  around,  but  because  of  weak  human  mental  strength.  "brothers?  pfhhh."  did  he  mean  the  piggies?  they  wouldn't  harm  a  fly,  though  zeke  wouldn't  mind  getting  his  revenge  on  them.  were  they  still  around?  maybe  he'd  have  a  little  look  around  the  forest,  do  some...  reconnecting.  but  vilem  should  know  that  the  forest  was  most  likely  the  safest  place  for  the  wolf  -  what  didn't  succeed  in  killing  him  in  all  these  years  wouldn't  start  winning  now.  even  if  someone  managed  to  surprise  him,  he  wasn't  helpless.  unless  the  old  farmer  was  involved  it  seemed.  until  this  day  &  most  likely  for  the  rest  of  his  life,  zeke  would  refuse  to  accept  that  vilem  -  the  old  grumpy  monster  hating  farmer,  would've  reacted  differently  if  zeke  told  him  beforehand.  did  he  have  explicit  proof?  obviously  not,  because  he  couldn't  turn  back  time,  but  still.  he  was  pretty  damn  sure.  they  ....time  they  spent  had  been  good,  at  least  he  thought  so  at  the  time  &  it  hadn't  been  enough  to  keep  him  in  that  bed.  it  was  in  the  past  now,  so  there  was  that.  "oh."  .....wait,  what?  he  would  have...  awkward  little  shift,  hand  brushing  through  his  hair,  "...now  you  know."  but  before  he  could  elaborate  &  make  this  worse,  vilem  to  the  rescue.  "i'm  not  turnin'  that  many  people.  besides,  i  was  born.  my  mother  was  a  wolf,  you  know?  not  a  lot  of  those  left,  even  less  with  human  infatuations."  little  shrug.  there  was  always  him,  but  even  if  ...  zeke  didn't  see  himself  falling  for  a  wolf  any  time  soon.  "yes,  i  feel  like  i  deserve  that  after  helping  you  out  so  much."  half  joke.  maybe.  although,  he  wouldn't  mind  being  pet  while  he  fell  asleep.  who  would?  nobody.  didn't  help  that  while  tending  to  the  animals  -  the  kind  that  was  important  to  vilem,  unlike  the  beast  he  sent  to  care  for  them,  zeke  couldn't  stop  thinking  about  the  old  farmer.  soft  him  on  his  lips,  his  rough,  calloused  fingers  in  his  hair  or  against  his  face.  so  when  they  came  together  again,  he  wasn't  quite  sure  how  to  take  it  from  there  until,  well...  you  can  wait  here  for  rory.  right.  he  was  allowed  here  ...  to  help  rory.  "don't  need  a  basket,  keep  it."  shaking  his  head  a  little,  he  sighed  softly.  "you  want  me  to  wait  outside?"

"careful  what  you  wish  for.  if  a  big  enough  group  bands  together,  you  might  have  some  actual  trouble  on  your  hands.  not  that  you're  going  around  seeking  trouble,  but  if  i  was  a  part  of  a  trio  of  brothers  that  you  attacked  i  might  be  cooking  something  up."  if  the  brothers  come  knocking  on  his  door,  he'll  actually  tell  them  to  leave  him  alone.  no  zeke  meant  no  help  for  rory.  the  old  man  certaintly  doesn't  know  how  to  raise  or  help  a  young  wolf  all  by  his  lonesome. 

he  needs  zeke. 

vilem  tilts  his  head  as  he  thinks  about  it.  on  one  hand,  it's  unfair  because  he  has  all  of  the  knowledge  that  he's  gained  years  later.  on  the  other  hand,  he  remembers  being  really  aroused  by  the  wolf  and  that  beating  out  any  other  sense  of  logic.  if  he  had  told  him  in  the  heat  of  the  moment,  during  foreplay,  perhaps  he  wouldn't  have  cared  too  much.  once  his  dick  is  hard  he  needs  to  release  somehow.  whether  it's  in  a  monster  or  human.  the  weakness  of  being  human!  “we'll  never  know.  i  never  got  the  chance  to  react  to  it  until  after  we  had  already,  well,  you  know.  there's  no  use  in  revisiting  that  anyway.  maybe  i  would've  just  fucked  you  harder  since  i  know  that  you  can  handle  it.”  he  chuckles  softly,  a  snort  slipping  through  his  lips  but  being  quieted  as  much  as  possible.  zeke's  right,  it  shouldn't  matter.  still,  the  farmer  has  his  faults  just  like  everyone  else.  “but  it  does.”  he  nods  a  bit,  not  wanting  to  get  in  between  the  man  and  his  respect.  “do  you  ever  think  there's  going  to  be  another,  at  least  in  these  parts?  maybe  someone  you  turn  is  going  to  be  even  bigger  and  badder  than  you  are.”  although  he's  really  not  interested  in  being  around  long  enough  to  see  that,  he  still  ponders  that  every  now  and  then.  “do  you  want  me  to  comb  my  fingers  through  your  hair  while  i  lay  you  down  on  a  couple  of  blankets?”  again,  another  half  joke.  apparently,  since  vilem  can't  talk  to  the  animals  nor  the  crops  his  part  is  quite  easy.  as  much  as  he  can  see,  they're  all  alright,  so  he  just  cuts  down  some  of  the  ones  that  are  good  for  picking.  there's  some  evening  primrose,  tobacco  leaves,  night  phlox,  and  moonflower  that  smell  just  good  enough  to  pick.  the  farmer  puts  them  all  in  the  basket  before  moving  over  to  the  fruits  and  vegetables.  some  corn,  broccoli,  tomatoes,  strawberries,  grapes,  and  peaches  are  also  ready.  he  brings  the  basket  back  and  notices  that  zeke  is  all  wrapped  up  too.  “if  you  think  i'm  picky  and  needy,  you  haven't  seen  the  half  of  it  yet  on  the  farm.  i'm  done  with  the  crops  though.”  vilem  leans  the  basket  over,  showing  it  to  zeke.  “thank  you  for  your  help.  do  you  want  me  to  make  a  little  basket  for  you?”  does  a  wolf  even  eat  fruit  or  vegetables?  “you  can  just  wait  here  for  rory.  it's  getting  late.” 

[hakugreenfinch]

i actually firmly believe that even if for the wrong reasons, curly was right to not give anya the captain gun.

im basing this on the assumptions/readings that a) jimmy was abusing both curly and anya in different ways, b) he assaulted anya in her sleep (i have several reasons to believe so) and as a consequence c) curly did not realize things were that bad until it was way too late (obligatory "even though yeah he should have taken anya seriously from the first report of 'hey jimmy was in my room last night'") but neither did anya really grasp just how badly she was being abused until after the dead pixel conversation (i think this is important because it shows just how careful jimmy was in his machinations).

the thing is we want to believe that oh sure if anya had a gun it would have been fine. but the other thing is that if you have a weapon in self defense - your attacker also has that weapon. giving anya the gun would have been as good as giving jimmy the gun and cocking it for him too - not to mention we actually experience that the gun isnt easy to fire, thus making it less reliable in the case of an emergency than one would think.

anya assumed curly wouldnt have given her the gun because she knew his relationship with jimmy, she knew curly would be worried she would hurt herself with it and she knew the company sucked and would have penalized them all if the gun got out of its case for reasons they dont deem "justified" - they didnt put locks on the sleeping quarters, i doubt they would rule anya's personal safety as reason enough. i think her assumptions in that were correct, curly isnt super strict as a captain but hes not "sure heres the super locked safety gun" lax. he trusted swansea with the axe because he trusted swansea to use it appropriately, he wouldnt have trusted anya with a firearm if she was in mental distress.

i dont think those were the good reasons to not let anya protect herself in this way ("corporate/jimmy will get mad" just is not it). but i do believe if he did give her the gun it would have been a matter of time before jimmy gets ahold of it and shit goes south a lot sooner. i believe jimmy isnt brave enough to do anything to anya while she could ask for help - his entire tactic is based on only letting anyone else notice small things that he could make excuses for. he probably would have taken it from anya while she was asleep, when she didnt have it right in her hand, when she looked away for a moment. it doesnt really matter, he would have found a way, boom, jimmy has a gun now.

why i think that would have been a lot worse than him acquiring the gun as late as he does in the game is that jimmy is pretty much fueled by a hunger for power and control. he gets those once curly is out of the picture as someone capable of running the ship but before the crash? hes very sneaky about his manipulation. he goes after anya physically when nobody can catch him because he can overpower her but he wouldnt try something like that with curly who is likely physically stronger than him (curly weight lifts in his free time!) which is why he puts pressure on him emotionally. the crash is actually very convenient for jimmy, he gets to usurp the title of captain without having to actually do anything to curly himself (as in, with his very own hands and with the intent of getting him out of his way). i just truly think if he had gotten his hands on the gun while curly still fully believed he was his friend and could fight back things would have gotten very ugly a whole lot faster.

tl;dr i think "anya should have had the gun" is something we want to believe would have saved the entire crew but considering jimmy's methods of exercising power over his crewmates proves otherwise. curly had the wrong reasons to not arm anya, but ultimately the longer the gun is out of jimmy's view the better.

[eliza-and-her-monsters]

the tortured poets department

Bonus Chapter

Info Post

Moodboards

Part I

Prev Part <> Next Part

Contains/TWs: a flashback essentially of reader and ellie whenever they were at the psychiatric hospital/wellness retreat together, the sweetest most gentle and soft ellie of all time. HELLLLAAAAA angst like next level angst. discussions of mental illness, hospitals/psychiatric facilities, and mentions of s**cide, sh/scars from sh. (this is not meant to romanticize psychiatric hospitals/care, mental illness s**cide or sh in any way. if you or someone you know is struggling please reach out. you are loved 💛)

WC: 2.5k

A/N: merry christmas eeeeve!! oh my ellie girls- did i ever cook for you 💛

Bonus

gold rush

I think the first time we actually talked was during one of the first nightmares. I hadn’t grown used to the big unbreakable windows or the heavy hospital beds and the idea of having a roommate who saw every one of my little quirks made it even worse. In fact I was even convinced she hated me after a while. She had tried so many times to be friends and I had blown her off every time. Why wouldn’t she?

It was in the middle of the night, one of the few nights I had actually gotten myself to fall asleep in which was promptly ruined. I don’t even know what had alerted her at first, she was such a light sleeper it could’ve been something as small as the change in my breathing. At any rate though before I could fall too deep into the hole I felt the grip of someone’s hand on my upper arm giving me a firm shake awake.

My vision was already so blurry because of the lack of glasses and the tears didn’t help. My breathing came out sharp and fast as I lifted my hands to roughly wipe at them. “No, hey, stop, don’t do that.” Ellie spoke as she passed off my glasses where I promptly slid them onto my eyes with shaking hands. And whenever I couldn’t find anything to wipe the tears away with she chose her sleeve, yanking it down far past her hand and pressing the fabric underneath my eyes until they coated it.

Normally, I would’ve pulled away. I would’ve scrambled and begged her not to. But the fact that for once someone besides my sister wasn’t looking at me like there was something wrong with me… I guess you could’ve called it an early stage trauma bond. Because all it did was pull me towards her. My hand was flying to hers before I know it, wrapping around her wrist as if to hold it into place.

I let out a tiny gasp in embarrassment, shaking my head to unravel my fingers as I stammered out an anxious apology. “I’m- I’m sorry-”

“It’s okay.” She spoke, the corners of her lips upturning in a weak smile as she inched herself closer. “The first week is usually the hardest. And you get pretty touch starved at some point so… you’re okay. I-I probably need it just as much as you do.”

I sniffled as I nodded, still trying to regulate my breathing as I pushed myself up to a sitting position, still desperately clutching at her arm with a trembling hand like she was the only thing I had left to hold on to. “How did you make it to England?” I whispered, subconsciously scooting aside so she could take a seat on the bed next to me, her shoulder just slightly brushing mine.

“Turns out whenever the US Army really fucks you up, they’re willing to shell out a shit ton of money to send you to the best mental health facilities in other countries to hopefully fix it.”

“Geez…” I muttered underneath my breath as I hugged my knees to my chest. “So you’re like, proper scarred then?”

I wasn’t expecting the massive laugh to burst from her lungs next, almost needing to slap a hand over her in order to not alert any of the nurses probably more than we already had. “You could say that.” She answered, resting her back against the wall before giving my arm the smallest of nudges. “What about you? What are you in for?”

“My parents… really just don’t know how to accept the fact that I’m… different. So they’ve stuck me in here hoping to find some kind of ‘cure’ I guess.” I shrugged, arms hugged around my knees. “Turns out just being extremely neurodivergent isn’t enough to fit the criteria of being put in a long term residential psychiatric care facility though so-”

“Oh yeah? Tried to check out too early too, huh?”

“Wow, it’s like you know me already.” I added with another tearful chuckle, Ellie already pulling at her sleeve to catch the strays before they could roll down my cheeks.

“I do know you.” She added, her tone shifting in a slightly more serious though still gentle tone. “I am you.”

For some reason the words brought forth another shuddering sob. A level of understanding I hadn’t seen in anyone else before, not even my sister. “C’mere.” I heard her whisper, pulling away her already halfway up short hair as she extended her arms out to me like we had known each other for years. The sound of my sob was muffled by her hoodie as she pulled me in, my face hidden in her chest as I let the broken cries finally escape.

It sounded so stupid, but I had tried my hardest not to cry while I was here. I thought if I acted like it enough maybe, finally, magically I’d become stable enough to not have to be here and it could even translate to my life outside. Turns out it didn’t work that way. Ellie brought out a new side of that though, she made me feel like it was okay to cry. And she’d be there every single time. Brushing away my tears or letting me hide my face in her shoulder or her chest until I didn’t have any left to cry.

“From now on… you’ve got me and I’ve got you, deal? So no more trying to check out too early, okay?” I wiped at my eyes with a gross sniffle, and whenever I pried myself from her hoodie I could see her staring at me with an expectant gaze and a lifted pinky finger. It was hard to say no to with that dorky little smile on her face. It was hard to say no to also whenever I knew she had been through so so much worse.

I nodded, weakly, but hoping it was enough enthusiasm for her as I wrapped my pinky around hers and feeling her give them the tiniest squeeze. “Perfect, now I’m never gonna leave you alone, squirt.”

The nickname brought out a tearful laugh from me, and I realized I couldn’t exactly remember the last time I had ever truthfully laughed as she tossed her arms back around me and decorated the top of my head in a dozen kisses. Whenever the nurse came at the usual 5 am to check vitals I distinctly remembered being curled up to her chest like she was my own personal pillow, dozed off to the sound of her breathing.

I knew it was an intense friendship, I knew it could’ve signified more. And honestly maybe that’s what I was afraid of. Growing so close to somebody only to have it brutally taken away from you by nothing more than the complication of love.

~

The wellness retreat we were at prided itself on trying to be just that, a retreat. They put a big emphasis on the great outdoors, courtyards and swimming pools and gardens, including a significant amount of grounds for us to go on walking trails. Ellie, I think, was determined to explore every inch of them before she got out and judging by both of our appointments we’d have the time too. So it was no surprise we frequently found ourselves on one, conjoined hands swinging back and forth like careless middle schoolers wanting to show off their very first relationship until Ellie’s long legs and curiosity got the better of her and she ended up trotting forward. She was after all exceedingly more fit than me.

“So, I don’t mean to pry or anything.” She spoke up after a moment of silence masked by our lazy footsteps.

“That’s never stopped you before.” I giggled before breaking out into a skip to catch up with her.

“Ha ha… very funny.” She snickered with a roll of her eyes. “So, I think I already know the answer to this but- it’s pride month, so humor me? Your sister’s an absolute fruit basket, right?”

I burst into laughter at her words before shrugging in response. “I mean, that’s certainly one way to put it.”

“So… what’s the likelihood your parents ended up with two gay daughters?” She wondered as she held up the number on her fingers.

A tiny smile stretched on my lips at the question, no sign of offense in sight from my end as I slipped my hand around the crook of her elbow. “I’d say… pretty likely.”

“Wicked.” She grinned a bit to herself as she rose her arm ever so slightly as if she was a gentleman escorting me to a fancy event. I chuckled once more at her old school slang, catching my bottom lip in between my teeth as if to avoid smiling even harder.

I released a sigh of relief the moment we approached a clearing enveloped perfectly with its high trees. “Can we stop for a second? I’m totally roasting out here.” I huffed as I trudged forward to find a comfortable seat and slip the psych issued backpack off of my back.

“It’s because you’re always wearing those flannels and long sleeves… even outside. No wonder you’re burning up.” Her voice noticeably got softer as she stepped up behind me with a soft hand on my back. “Why do you do that, by the way?” She questioned, gently slipping her hands up my covered arms to the elbows nearly making me tremble.

“You- You know why.” I mumbled, feeling our bodies naturally inch closer until I pressed my hands to her chest.

“No I know why I guess I just… don’t really know why you wear them here, you know? And around me? I-I mean we all have scars.” She wondered, her careful hands sliding around my back. Somehow despite all of our previous touches and general antics and even falling asleep in the same bed it felt as if this was the most intimate we had ever gotten. Stood like two high schoolers at a dance who had no idea what they were doing, yet everything at the same time.

“I guess I just- I never wanted to bother anybody else. Especially you. They’re- They’re not pretty, and they hurt and- I don’t know.”

Ellie let one of her hands encircle around my forearm against her chest where one of my hands held onto her shoulder. On instinct I tensed up, expecting the worst, expecting the judgemental eyes of doctors and the saddened ones of nurses. “I think scars are a sign of strength- of bravery.” She spoke, gently turning my wrist until the scars were pointed upwards where she gradually rolled my sleeve.

“Your’s are maybe. Mine aren’t brave. H-Hurting yourself isn’t brave.”

Ellie’s brushed a tender thumb along the raised skin, the healed markers of stitches. Normally the touches would’ve caused the slightest sting or even a throb. Healed enough to have faded ever so slightly but not enough to have stopped the pain entirely. Ellie’s touch was so gentle though, so careful and delicate. “Surviving through it is though.” My eyebrows knitted together as a waterfall of tears burned behind my eyes.

“That doesn’t mean do it again-“ she ordered as she held up a stern finger with her free hand. “But… just don’t be ashamed either, you know?” Ellie caught a stray tear with her thumb just before carefully lifting my scarred arm until she could brush her lips against it. Placing delicate featherlike kisses against every little wound.

“Thank you.” I sniffled, a soft sob catching in the back of my throat just as I felt her pulling me in, my face muffled in the crook of her shoulder as she wrapped a strong arm around me. “I think you might just be the sun.”

“Darling…” I could feel her shaking her head from just above me as she still held my wrist with such care. “I’m far from the sun. I’m just a girl who… who really really cares about another girl.”

It almost felt like a declaration of some sort, my eyes flickering upwards to meet her softened green eyes, her star-like freckles that I could trace like constellations, down to her curved lips. Maybe I was hallucinating and delusional, looking back on it I probably was. A one-sided magnetic pull towards her perfectly pink lips. So why did she seem to get closer too? Why did she wrap her arms around my waist to pull me in? Why did she let my hand caress her face in the way it did? Why why why why?

At the last second I felt her lips shifting, pressing softly to my cheek instead of my own and I could nearly feel my heart shatter right then and there. “Baby, I can’t do this to you.” She whispered with a shake of her head, the step backwards only sending me reeling as I fought the urge to dive after her.

“But I- I thought-“

“I know- I know but- fuck, please don’t cry, Millie, I’m sorry.” Ellie didn’t cry often, so whenever she did it was a big deal. But in that moment I could see the tears welling up in her own eyes as she drew back to me so quickly I nearly lost balance. “I can’t- I-I can’t give you your first kiss in here. We- We can’t do this, Millie. I love you s-so fucking endlessly but I- y-you deserve to have your first kiss be from somebody special and somewhere romantic and… not with me.” She sighed a bit to herself, clenching her hands at her sides as if it killed her to say any of this.

“I just can’t give you what you need i-in that sense right now and I- I hate myself for it and I feel like I’ve screwed up the most important and precious thing in my life because of it but… I can’t lie to you. I just can’t.” A weak sob fell from her lips as she let her hands fly to her eyes as if it’d somehow hide all the evidence.

If she were a selfish woman she would’ve gone through with it. She would’ve pushed her lips to mine and held on for dear life and maybe it would’ve gone farther. But she wasn’t selfish. In fact she was probably the most overwhelmingly selfless person I had ever met.

“Ellie, love.” I gulped back my own tears as I stepped forward to take her body into my own arms, lifting up onto my tiptoes so she could nuzzle her face into my own shoulder. “I’m not mad at you. You didn’t screw anything up. You could never screw this up.”

Ellie’s arms squeezed around my waist as she let her tears soak into the crook of my neck with a shuddering sob. “You are the only good thing that has ever happened to me.”

“And you’re still the sun.” I spoke softly, inching away only to cup her freckled face in my hand and press my forehead to hers. “You saved me. So you’re my sun.”

[brucestalia]

give me morally complex antiheroes and star-crossed lovers any day ∘₊✧

✦•┈๑⋅⋯ ⋯⋅๑┈•✦✦•┈๑⋅⋯ ⋯⋅๑┈•✦✦•┈๑⋅⋯ ⋯⋅๑┈•✦✦•┈๑⋅⋯ ⋯⋅๑┈•✦ what draws me to brutalia is the endless back-and-forth between them—it's painful, yet it’s the kind of pull that you can’t help but get lost in, canon be damned.

look at them! they're meant to be. they're so endgame. they're married, they're divorced, they're everything.

while i'm not opposed to batman x literally anyone else, the reason i love this ship in particular is because it isn't the usual "i can fix him" dynamic (unlike some portrayals of other love interests). instead, it's more like, "oh damn, did i make him worse? aha...."

similarly, it’s not "i can fix her" either. he doesn't need to fix her—they share the same core morals (unlike, cough cough, catwoman).

now, this isn't to say i dislike the other ladies bruce is often paired with. i just think they all have better options.

exhibit a: wonder woman a platonic relationship between bruce and diana is a fantastic representation of a healthy male-female friendship. diana and steve are an adorable, enduring couple, and in some distant-future timeline, i could even see her with clark. but diana and bruce? they're just a completely serious version of "comrade."

on that note, i would kill to see bruce and steve bond over being hopelessly in love with their respective immortal-warrior-princesses. also, in the most idealistic of circumstances, diana and talia would probably get along quite well.

exhibit b: catwoman i cannot put into words how much i adore catwoman. but the one thing i can’t fully get behind is batcat (okay, i don't hate it, i'm just being dramatic haha). batcat is essentially a decades-long booty call—a situationship, if you will. my girl selina deserves better! with bruce, she can never truly embrace being fully on the other side of the law.

a new challenger enters the arena! wait, is that...?

yes, it’s batwoman, aka kate kane. now, hear me out.

catwoman: hunted was where i first really noticed this pairing. it could work! it’s been well-established that batwoman is its own mantle, not just a female counterpart to batman. kate also doesn’t struggle with the same moral dilemmas her cousin does.

okay, i don’t really know how this evolved into a kate x selina post, but hey, every good relationship needs a third wheel that sometimes comes with a fourth wheel, right?

dc comics bombshells is another great source for this! i'll just leave a few moments down here :)

what i'm getting at is that i'd love to see a universe where talia isn’t constantly being pitted against every woman in bruce’s life. zatanna is a story for another day, but the others—silver st. cloud, vicki vale, nocturna, or whatever lady tickles the writer’s fancy—always felt circumstantial to me. ✦•┈๑⋅⋯ ⋯⋅๑┈•✦✦•┈๑⋅⋯ ⋯⋅๑┈•✦✦•┈๑⋅⋯ ⋯⋅๑┈•✦✦•┈๑⋅⋅๑┈•✦

[misspelledwordswizard]

Hello there!✨️ First of all, I wanted to say that your writing is amazing! Keep up the good work ;3.

Anyway, I wanted to make a request (if you have too many, please ignore this. Don't overwork yourself). This might be a little cliche, but here is what I had in mind. "The Chain x Mulan!Reader." Mostly their reaction when they find out that the reader is a female.

Like the boys, the reader has the spirit of the hero, but in her time, women aren't allowed to fight or do anything that the men do at all. So, just like Mulan, the reader runs away from home, pretends to be a boy, and fights against Ganon's armies. Even after meeting the Chain, her identity remains hidden. One day, she gets badly hurt, and when they tend to her wounds that's when they notice that he is a she.

You can ignore this if you want ^^, but yeah, that is basically my request. Have a great day, evening, or night.

Again, your work is amazing! ✨️✨️✨️👏✨️✨️✨️

Oh, you are so sweet, thank you so much!!! I really loved doing this, did I mention I love mixing fandoms? cuz I love it so much! Anyway, I hope you like it, dear <3333

The fight against the group of Bokoblins was going smoothly, that is until a Moblin appeared, right behind me, while I was dealing with one of them, a particularly strong one. I must admit that I’ve had better days, this wasn’t a day when I was lucky, I dare say I was very unlucky today, but that was certainly the worst part. 

I barely had time to turn around to see the monster before being hit hard by its attack, and suddenly, Boom, I blacked out. Darkness, I can’t feel my body, and I don’t even know what was happening to my companions. My mind guided me to the day I met them, my fellow heroes, who bore a similar fate to mine, with one small big difference, of course. 

It was a strange day a few months ago, I passed through a suspicious portal thinking it might be some kind of enemy attack, and suddenly I fall in front of nine heroes of Hyrule from different eras.  They welcomed me as one of their own, even though I wasn’t so sure about it myself, and since then we’ve been working together on this mission to stop the shadow and its abnormally strong monsters. Simple, right? 

Wrong, not simple at all. Of course, I already have some experience in hiding my true gender, after all, I had to do it throughout my adventure to save Hyrule in the past, the problem is that now I was constantly surrounded by men! This ended up becoming a huge nightmare. As much as I like the boys, as much as I now see them as my own family, I don’t know if I can tell them the truth. No one knows about this secret of mine, and I fear how they might react, so I’ve been avoiding the subject. 

It was hard, really hard.  Like the times they decided to all go into the river together to cool off, it was hard enough to deal with all those shirtless men without freaking out, and it was even worse because they expected me to do the same, and when I didn’t, they were all over me, worried, thinking there was something wrong, that maybe I was sick or insecure about scars, which they made a point of giving me a lecture about how normal it was, and that I should be proud of mine, because they showed that I was a survivor. Very welcoming, but I still didn’t go in. 

Even with these difficulties, so far, I have managed to hide my secret well, for my own safety. Until now. 

When I finally woke up from my blackout, I felt lost, it took me a while to notice the new environment and my traveling companions who had gathered around me. I was lying on the bed of an inn, everyone was looking at me with curiosity and concern as I tried to sit up in bed, the blanket slipped, revealing that I was without my tunic.  I wore a girdle around my torso that helped to reduce the volume of my bust and keep it mostly hidden, but without the layers of clothing to disguise it, there was no way they could help but notice my visibly feminine silhouette, and it was quite obvious that they had already noticed it. 

It didn’t take long for panic to start to hit me, all the nervousness, the anguish that I kept along with my secrets, ready to overflow. I could feel my own body reacting to this, heating up uncomfortably, and apparently the others noticed it too. Time approached me and rubbed my back gently, in an attempt to calm me down. 

— Calm down, breathe, it’s okay, you don’t need to be nervous. 

— I... – Tears overcame me before I could formulate a complete sentence, which made the task even more difficult. – I’m sorry! I had to do this, no one would ever accept that the hero of the kingdom was a woman, it was the only way. I didn’t have the courage to tell you because I didn’t want you to see me as incapable or treat me differently, please, please don’t hate me! 

The tears, the occasional sobs and my crying voice only made everything harder to understand, and I didn’t have the courage to look them in the eyes, I didn’t want to see their faces of disappointment. The wound on my back hurt as I curled up trying to hide my humiliation. 

— Hate you? What the hell are you talking about, why would we hate you, girl?! – The Veteran’s somewhat aggressive voice left me confused about how I should feel, but his sentence left me confused. 

— Yeah, there’s no reason for that, my dear, it’s understandable that you were afraid to reveal your secret when you were raised with such prejudiced thoughts, but that just shows us how strong you were. – The calmness in Sky’s speech was comforting, but I was still confused. Didn’t they care, really? 

— Your gender doesn’t change who you are, nor does it make you weaker or more incapable, it just shows how amazing you are for being able to deal with all of this! – The Champion’s excitement and support helped me gather courage and look at them again. 

— But... aren’t you mad that I hid this from you? – Even calmer, my crying voice still remained as I sniffled trying to control myself. Twilight just shook her head, as if this was an absurd idea.   

— Of course not, you were just protecting yourself, darlin’.  

— Actually, now that makes a lot of sense, it explains a few things... – The Traveler says thoughtfully, before turning his attention back to me. – And most importantly, are you feeling any pain? – I just shake my head negatively, it was nothing serious, it seems like my injury was practically healed.  

— Look, no matter what they say, you’re one of us, okay? Never forget that. – Warriors speaks in a soft and comforting voice, and I tried hard not to burst into tears again, wiping the tears before they could fall and giving a smile that was a mix of relief and happiness.  

Wind approached me and hugged me tightly, I couldn’t hold it this time and shed a few tears seeing my boy being so affectionate and understanding, partly also because this hug was very close to where I had been hit, but he didn’t need to know that.  I hug him back until he finally pulls away to look at me, wiping away his own tears. 

— Look how cool, now besides being able to say that I have eight super cool older brothers, I can also say that I have an even cooler older sister! – His excitement at this fact made me laugh, and I ruffled his hair affectionately.  

— To tell you the truth, I already knew. – Four’s speech made everyone’s attention turn to him. – I mean, there were some small details that made me suspicious, but I kept quiet, especially since the secret wasn’t mine. I figured you’d say something when you felt ready, and I didn’t see any problem with that. – He just shrugged naturally. His cunning and intelligence sometimes scares me, usually those with the hero’s spirit don’t use their brains much, we usually leave that job to the princesses.  

— By the way... – My attention went back to the Sailor, who seemed thoughtful. – Is your name really Link?  

— No! – I said and laughed at the suspicious expression the youngest gave me.  – I just used it as a codename, if I used my real name, it would be pretty obvious that I’m a woman. And also, that’s the Hero’s name, right? – Everyone seemed to agree with the logic, but it didn’t diminish their curiosity about my real name, which I had no problem revealing. 

— Well, at least now you’ll be lucky enough to be called by your name, unlike the rest of us who have to deal with this bunch of nicknames to try to differentiate ourselves! – Legend pointed out, making me laugh. 

I can get used to being called by my real name again. 

[niennanir]

It is Two Days to Christmas and I am in Walmart.

I hate Walmart. I'm not getting into cultural or economic ground here, it's an actual physical problem for me to be in a Walmart. I'm not just hyper observant, I'm hyper perceptive and Walmart assails the senses in a way that borders on the debilitating. The is too much stuff, piled to the ceilings on rows that are engineered in a way that cuts off sight lines, there are too many colors, too many people, and the smells, they're overwhelming and conflicting. The lights are too bright. The lights are too loud. The HVAC and the coolers in frozen foods are also too loud and I can hear all of them in dissonance.

I will avoid Walmart if I can. The longest I've managed to stay out is four years. My schedule used to take me to parts of town where I had more options but my schedule changed this year and now the easiest option is to go the four miles to Walmart rather than the fifteen to somewhere less offensive to my own personal brand of crazy.

It is too days to Christmas and Walmart is three times worse than it is any other time of the year.

I only need a half a dozen things and I zip from aisle to aisle as fast as I can, skirting around shoppers who look dazed beneath the yellow green glow of the humming florescent lights. I slither past a man trying to figure out where he left his wife and rapidly start scanning at the nearest self checkout. I can feel my anxiety ramping up but it's fine, I can get out of here in a few minutes, out into the fresh air and the warm Florida sun. It's fine.

I reach into my bag for my phone, my hand closes around it as I remember that I can't use my phone at Walmart. I use Apple Pay for nearly all my groceries. The less I fumble with my wallet in a crowded store the better. But I can't use it here. I let go of my phone and dig down for my wallet.

My wallet isn't there.

I open my bag wider and stare into its depths. There is an iPhone, a tiny drawing pad with a stub of a pencil. A grape chapstick. My car keys. My sunglasses. And no wallet.

I jiggle my bag ineffectually, hoping for a Christmas miracle that will summon my wallet from the back pocket of my favorite pair of jeans. My favorite pair of jeans is hanging on the back of the bathroom door. I wore them last night to look at lights, and I put my wallet in my back pocket after I bought hot chocolate.

I could walk out of course. I want to. But there are so many people in line waiting, trying to get home to their other tasks. I flag down the nearest self checkout monitor.

"You're going to have to clear my transaction." I say "I left my wallet at home"

"Oh dear, are you sure?" she replies. "I can save the transaction and you can go get your wallet and come back, then at least you won't have to collect everything again."

"It's eight miles there and back in heavy traffic," I say with a sigh. "It would take a miracle to get back here before the frozen vegetables thawed."

"Ma'am, did you forget your wallet?"

I turn at the sound of the man's voice. He's a little older than me, an everyman type. Polo shirt shorts and docks, the standard Florida grocery shopping uniform.

"I did," I say with a sigh.

"I do that all the time," he said sympathetically. I'm about to reply that unfortunately that doesn't make me feel better.

"Would you let me buy your groceries for you?"

I freeze.

It's rare that I don't know what to say. I always have a quip or a comeback. But in that moment all I can think of is the eight mile drive, the whine of the lottery ticket machine the way the fourth florescent light from my left is flickering, the fact that I should have been back to work ten minutes ago.

It's only $35 dollars. I have $35. What I don't have is another trip to Walmart in me today.

"Hey!" the self checkout monitor says cheerfully. "You got your Christmas miracle from Santa!"

"Thank you," I say to the man. I can feel my throat closing up as he reaches over and runs his card.

"I do this all the time," he says, shaking his head. "This is the only place I can't use my phone."

"That's how I got in trouble," I admit.

He nods, knowingly. "You have a Merry Christmas!"

"Merry Christmas to you too!"

By the time I've gathered my bags he's disappeared in the crowd.

I couldn't pick him out of a lineup right now if my life depended on it. I notice everything, but he was so unassuming there wasn't a lot to notice. Just a guy, in Walmart, two days to Christmas.

Making the world a little better $35 at a time.