#so yes it was worth it
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Yorha android Miku, aka 39B
This drawing is the singular reason I have failed inktober. HOW could I concentrate on anything but this?? She has consumed me I fear
(Yes her sword is a leek version of Virtuous Contract. YES she is standing on a pile of leeks. YES I felt the leeks were too important to only mention in the tags.)
#this piece has been consuming my life for the past few weeks#yes weeks#I kept undoing and redoing many parts over n over#it was absolutely worth it though#I love how she turned out in the end#artists on tumblr#digital art#krita#miku worldwide#nier#nier automata#nier 2b#nier anime#nier fanart#nier 9s#nier reincarnation#nier automata fanart#hatsune miku#miku#miku fanart#miku hatsune#vocaloid#viva viva happy chu lu chu chu#augh I'm so so happy to finally get to post this#but also what will my life become without this drawing to keep me occupied?#stay tuned to find out what fate befalls me ig#my art
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the more I play the more I think lucanis basically knows it's illario who betrayed him right from the beginning (he's had a year in the ossuary to think. not that many people knew where he was going. when you ask him 'did Illario know you'd be on that ship' his only answer is the hardest flattest 'yes' you ever heard). so it's not so much about figuring out who the traitor is (because that's ludicrous. we all know. immediately. they didn't really bother to hide it lmao) as about methodically closing off every single avenue of denial lucanis has clung to that whole time with as much or little gentleness as you might prefer until he has no choice but to admit it. because the moment he has to admit it, he'll have to do something -- feel something -- about it. and that's such a catastrophic event in lucanis' inner landscape (he has had TWO people in this whole entire world up until now and will do anything to hold on to them with a heartbreaking child-like desperation, even at and especially through the detriment of his own self) that he'd rather just. not. what if we quite simply. didn't. what if we just stayed here in the emptiness where we can both pretend you didn't hurt me in a way I should never forgive. I have so much practice in that with caterina already it's always worked out great for everyone so far. (press x to fucking doubt but that's trauma logic for you lol)
after everything illario did, so much of the storm of lucanis' emotions around it is 'what the FUCK did you get yourself tangled up in this time and how do I get you out of this mess safely'. what's worse: the fact that your brother murdered you, or that he put himself in horrible danger doing so and thus exposed you to the risk of losing him forever. lucanis' heart certainly has an opinion here and it's fucking unhinged (affectionate)
the themes of dissociation in lucanis' character in general makes me feel nuts. allllll these contradictory messy things he needs to cut off from each other because they can't coexist or be easily reconciled inside him. but all remain stubbornly true separately anyway and will have their due one day. love and resentment. tenderness and fear and rage. terror and longing. love and freedom don't coexist. the burned out golden child anthem is playing in the background. he was always caterina's favourite and he has to keep striving to deserve that dubious honour with every breath he takes and then, presumably, mercifully, some day he will die and be excused and can rest. and until now he's suppressed all the -- natural, healthy, protective! -- negative feelings that threaten the few attachment relationships he actually has, at the cost of ever actually having his needs for connection and safety met and leaving his core self imprisoned and compromised. and spite goes 'what. no. that's dumb fuck that' (*spite voice* I do not understand that and even if I did I would not respect it) and does not allow him to fall back into that, which I think is what saves his life, ultimately. it took being possessed by a demon for lucanis to even contemplate telling anyone he loves 'no' in any way, but hey. whatever gets you there right lol
lucanis is dealing with the freeze response allll the way down baby. and he was even before the ossuary, that just turbo powered it and brought it to a breaking point way before it could happen naturally. but something was going to break eventually no matter what, and I'm just glad that in the end, through the power of friendship and also pure spite, it doesn't have to be him
#I am worried about him all the time. but also: his found family of godslaying maniacs and also the power of love. there are reasons to hope#when there was only one set of footprints in the sand that was the veilguard party holding lucanis in their arms#and going 'excuse you he said no FUCKING pickles!!!' while he's like '🥺should you guys really be -- ' 'YES'#dragon age#dragon age: the veilguard#dragon age: the veilguard spoilers#dragon age spoilers#lucanis dellamorte#dragon age meta#there's some messiness to his arc but what mary kirby managed to capture here about how this works. is everything to me#he is so exactly for me. I'm sorry for all the people he turned out not to be for. but not for him being for me#the gift of looking at him and hearing 'you're more than what you're going through' and be forced to annoyedly go 'okay#MAYBE that could be also be true for me. maybe.' he's going through it. and also so much more and the funniest person in the world#he's so worth it to still have in the world!!!!#I'm so glad we don't get to 'fix' his relationship with his family and especially caterina actually#that is stuff that would need to happen on a time scale waaay outside of the one in this game#and there's Something very real in having to go 'this is not for me to decide for you. who you love and what you do about it is yours'
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Then all those years of building - were they worth anything? Yes - they're just hoping you don't realize it.
Rebecca Sugar going in for the kill with some sketches out of absolutely nowhere. Here's my best attempt at getting an okay-ish image out of a blurry vertical phone recording of a screen. Original video was posted on the official rebeccasugar account on TikTok - a big thank you to @jeejyboard for bringing it to my attention.
#bismuth#rose quartz#bisrose#steven universe#rebecca sugar#crewniverse art#genuinely my instant immediate first thought was 'yes of course everyone should be kissing bismuth'#bis are you feeling alienated from your own labour#so anyway here's some seeds of doubt and nascent ideas of self-worth to help in your radicalisation and also some makeouts#the crystal gems aka a great big polycule#let's get down to bismuth#that little image where she's got a finger to her lips and is just processing and lost in thought............... she is precious i love her#i am emotionally compromised
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janeford ± hands
#my lady jane#myladyjaneedit#jane x guildford#janeford#myladyjanecentral#janefordarchive#perioddramaedit#userninz#chrissiewatts#userelliee#tusermira#usertina#firstprinced#mine*#how many gifs can i make of their hands? yes#SO MANY#and there were more but these were the chosen few#their duality is crazy#like wdym she's gagging his mouth one minute and caressing his chest the next????#this will probably take years to load but it is worth it mayybee
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When in doubt, Soup it out.
[First] Prev <–-> Next
#poorly drawn mdzs#mdzs#lan wangji#a-yuan.#wei wuxian#Yes I am skipping over LWJ's panic at WWX joking about giving birth to A-Yuan. It's funny bit but there are many more to come!#The last time these two sat down together the tensions were so high. The peace is nothing more than a layer of cold fat on the surface.#It's not 'really' them coming to see eye to eye. It's them not having the energy to say what they really want anymore.#LWJ is very defined by his jealousy and the conflict it creates with his need to put his feelings aside for the perceived greater good.#To live a life where you are always second and never ever allowing yourself to be first...#If other people can be at peace and happy - it has to be worth it right?#If he orders a plate of food that he will struggle to eat but is the favourite thing of the person sitting across from him#Is it not worth the sacrifice?#But remember! You can't take anything for yourself ever. No matter how much you want it.#He did it once before and he regrets it so much. So all he can do is accommodate.#And WWX? Well. You can't let anyone in if there isn't enough water to splash around in.#Keep things shallow and they just move on. Even if you'll miss them when they go - this is just how things are now.#No more teasing and trying to pull a reaction from LWJ anymore. You'll never be more than someone he can't stand so what's the point.
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HAPPY HALLOWEEN!!!
(It's not belated what are you talking about-) With the spooky day I bring...
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--------------------------------------- There's A LOT OF ART under the cut, however it's A LOT OF SPOILERS.
ESPECIALLY FOR THE ACT 6 ENCOUNTER/TWO HATS, EVERYTHING IN THIS POST IS DEPENDANT ON THE FACT YOU KNOW ABOUT THAT ENCOUNTER.
(The dandelions are frozen in time) (...) (You envy them, but you think that's sacrilege, so you move on.)
The gif takes forever to load, please bare with me-
ALRIGHT, LET ME INTRODUCE YOU TO ROBORO.
Roboro (it/they/he) is cold and calculative. It spent so long trying to get out of the loops, that a lot of their tact and bubbliness gave way to their cynicism and bluntness.
They exhibit more of their younger traits. Extreme smarts and avoidance. However, they still carries themselves tall, and aren't afraid to speak their mind. Most of the time, they simply choose not to.
The decision to make him cold and distant, rather then manic and erratic, actually came from Loop themselves. Loop is very actively trying to be the opposite of Siffrin. They act chatty and cruel because that's how far they've been driven, that's how they choose to hide themselves now.
Roboro is the same, in the sense that it's supposed to appear the very opposite of Isabeau.
"Why is it a Dandelion?"
From what I've seen, most people lean on the space idea for the guides, and I find that super neat-
But as an exercise (before this AU was even an IDEA in my mind-) I tried to design Mira, Odile and Isa as guides.
I tried the space theme, and felt really limited with it.
So instead I decided to design them based of ways to wish
Mira was a fire (candle)
Odile was a coin (throwing a coin in a fountain/well)
And Isabeau WAS in fact a dandelion (blowing on a dandelion)
And I guess that idea just stuck around in my brain until I got to making this au.
Their Dynamic With Isa
The two's dynamic isn't too dissimilar to Sif and Loop. Isa still tries to be his loud positive headstrong self, and Roboro sees past the bullshit, and grinds Isa's gears
(Fun fact for that second one: Roboro knew Isa wanted to be called "good boy" cause it probably would have wanted to hear it too-) As time goes on, the two learn to get along if only a little. Isa starts to appreciate the bluntness of Roboro, together with the helpful tips. Roboro meanwhile, seeing Isa's descent starts to feel a spark of empathy for the guy (which sucks for ACT 5 whoops.)
Silver Coin Equivalent
The equivalent is called "Lucky Pencil". Isa is a pretty superstitious guy, despite knowing better logically. So I thought he'd totally be the type to carry around a lucky charm of sorts!
(You recall.) (Before you lost yourself to time, you tried to become a defender.) (You got so tired of being the lone kid, the one people would not see, or think about.) (You were smart, but you were invisible.) (Sure, you were quiet, but you had good grades! You were getting by!) (Even your own family didn't think much of your solitude.) (And yet, you were so scared to open your mouth, to even answer questions you knew the answers to-) (It was hard. Suffocating even.) (When teachers started giving you good grades without you even having to try-) (Something had to change. You had to change.) (And you did! You became stronger, resilient, reliable. Became the very antithesis of what you used to be.) (Left everything you were behind.) (But it was worth it! You could finally!!! Talk!!! You could bring smiles to people's faces! They'd smile when you entered a room! And each time you felt pride. Pride in who you were.) (You tried talking with your family more, being more open, loud-) (They still didn't see you.) (Smart kids turned away, uble to face you, see their fears embodied. Fears that if they wanted to belong, they had to leave their brains for brawn.) (It was better. You were happier. But you still didn't belong, either.) (In hallways filled with people, you were still just there.) (…) (You tried really hard for you Defender exam. You exercised to near faints. Only really ate and slept cause you knew it would make you stronger.) (Buried your nose in reading and studying to avoid thoughts of doubt. And when they'd reach you anyways, you'd go for a run.) (You know it wasn't the best for you. You're supposed to be stupid, not unwise. "Just until I pass" you told yourself.) (… You were exhausted on your exam day. As your nerves heightened, so did your "coping". You were ready!!! You just, needed a little help.) (So you opened your drawer, filled with old papers and textbooks and notes. You don't like looking in there too much, but you took what you needed.) (A beaten up pencil. Your little lucky charm!!! Sure, you always knew the answers, but it was easier if you believed this pencil was helping you, guiding you.) (It was silly to think it would help, but you weren't taking chances.) (…) (Even after all that time, you couldn't leave that part of yourself behind.) (You still can't.) (You're the only one that can't.)
ACT 6 FIGHT
The ACT 6 encounter would... go about as well as you'd expect. Not only did a version of you win- it's the version of you that pretends to be a meat head, the one that's preoccupied with being nice rather then thinking ahead. How did he get to win when you, you who's changed, you who's given everything you had, everything you wanted to simply get out?
Why does he get to win? Why does this loud mouth, emotional, explosive guy get to win? He's learned nothing!---
I have more stuff to draw for this encounter, including the "I'm sorry/ thank you" pictures. I leave this one off with the knowledge that Isa used to tug on his hair as a stress stim. Guess is stuck around huh.
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Post Loops Roboro
Roboro, once again, Changes! This time to resemble a yellow dandelion, rather then a white one. The family is long gone by the time Roboro wakes up again, and first thing's first- It has to find clothes. It doesn't like the weird looks people give him.
So, he goes to the House, braves the looks and gasps and confusion. It's trauma be damned, it's gonna talk to that Head Housemaiden finally.
He meets up with Euphrasie, and she quickly catches on what must be going on.
She's readily willing to give Roboro one of her old dresses-
Problem being- 1. They are too big on it (he may be Tall, but not EUPHIE level tall-) and 2. It wouldn't be the most comfortable wearing a dress around.
So, they figure they should make some adjustments. Euphrasie is willing to make the adjustments, it would only take her a day or two.
However, Roboro kind of... wants to try to do it themselves. There's no rush, it has nowhere to be. Maybe... maybe learning to re-engage with an old hobby could be good for it...?
Euphie excitedly lets it stay at the House, figure out what it wants to do- to take it's time changing!
Obviously, Roboro has trauma from the House. The walls, the cramped space- it terrifies them. But they also don't want to stay at anyone's home in Dormont, the awkwardness would kill him, if feeling like a nuisance doesn't do it first.
So. Roboro stays at the rooftop.
Roboro does some sewing on a new outfit, at the top of the House. At the very end of everything.
It's a bittersweet reminder that it's over, so it's as good as it could get while staying at Dormont.
I have a whole comic about this in particular, but this is already a massive infodump so I'm gonna stop it there for now-
Roboro travels around a while. It and Isa agreed to meet up eventually, but there was no rush to it.
He went around a while, re-familiarized itself with life, with people, with hobbies, with existing-
Probably made some friendships along the way. Those are probably the people who pushed it into reconnecting with the family.
I'm not gonna go into detail about everyone's dynamics and stuff, this is too long, and I'm still writing that stuff anyway.
I can however leave you with this:
(I might change how Post Loops Isa looks in the future, I haven't quite figured it out yet)
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PHEW
THAT WAS A LOT
IT'S NOT EVEN EVERYTHING I HAVE, I HAVE SO MUCH STUFF AUGH,,,
Anyways, I just wanted to thank you all for the support on the first post, I didn't expect it at ALL Just know I appreciate it :]
#isat spoilers#in stars and time spoilers#isat#in stars and time#irac#in repetition and change#irac roboro#irac isa#some of him pff-#BUT YEAH- I know this isn't the most consumable- but I hope you guys like Roboro#I think about the guy. A fair amount#Thank you all for such incredible positive feedback#it's amazing- I've seen all your comments and stuff and it absolutely made my week so worth it#Also yes. That Roboro in color is a Gravity Falls reference cause I thought it was funny#two hats spoilers#two hats
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can I humbly request.... some Gavv art of the guys?
I missed them last weekend... I've started to look forward to our weekly sugar high!
#kamen rider#kamen rider gavv#kamen rider valen#fan art#'hold still senpai!!'#the boys from the show about seeking joy and spreading happiness despite the danger?? yes PLEASE!!!#i love how well they work together#cant wait to see them have a falling out lol#Valen is so hard to draw but easy to color... Gavv is so easy to draw but hard to color wahh but its worth it for both of them#each of these have gotten more complicated than originally intended because i have no self control but this one takes the cake thus far lma#was unable to freehand this lol... the linework took a couple passes...
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#jerejean#fanart#all for the game#jeremy knox#jean moreau#FIRST TIME I DREW JEAN MOREAU EVERYONE BE NICE TO ME#i specifically gave him a haircut in this because last we know his hair is still uneven#so this is the product of catlaila having taken him to a barber and surprising Jeremy with Jean (undercut) instead of Jean (Uneven)#EYE think its charming ... but it also implies Post Sunshine court events so.#I'm a happy gal im a happy girl i like to think happy things#yes that IS bark bark on the sweaters#yes Jeremy DID get them custom made#yes it WAS a ridiculous price#YES IT WAS WORTH IT STOP ASKING JEREMY THAT!!!#anyway. I will probably do catlaila and sethison#aaanndd danmatt and nickyerik version of this as well#jurys out on andreil because i dont believe they would participate in matching sweaters#OUT OF FESITIVITY RELATED STUFF RATHER THAN GENERAL MATCHING#like do they gaf about christmas like that... idk.....#but we shall see.#other fandoms#other fandoms: all for the game
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I find the fact that the confrontation at the end of UTRH is often summarized as Jason asking Bruce to kill the Joker for him fascinating.
Because that's not what happened.
Jason holds a gun up to Joker's head, gives Bruce another, and tells him that if Bruce doesn't do something (shoot Jason), he will kill Joker.
Jason doesn't give the gun to Bruce so that he would shoot Joker. He isn't expecting Bruce to pull the trigger on the clown. He's asking Bruce to do nothing. To be inactive. Because that will still be a choice, and despite having done nothing, everybody clearly agrees that Bruce would still, at least in part, be responsible for Joker's death.
...And to me, this moment is a kind of- microcosm, of the rest of Jason's point. Because after being captured and carted off to Arkham, the villain will escape again, and will kill more people. The only way to truly prevent that from happening would be to kill them; Bruce refuses to do so, and I respect his right to choose such a thing for himself, but it is still a choice, and if we agree that Bruce's inaction during the confrontation would leave him at least partly responsible for the Joker's death, then we must also agree that his inaction in permanently preventing the Rogues from killing more people means he is also, partly, responsible for all of those deaths.
#my dc posting#batman#dc#bruce wayne#jason todd#joker#uhh is this like analysis or meta#anyway. to me this is the message that scene sends#if we say bruce doing nothing would mean he assisted in the murder of joker then bruce doing nothing about the villains means he is also#responsible for those deaths#ANYWAY yes b4 you come at me;;#bruce's belief in rehabilitation and that everyone can get better is central to his character#and i love it and no i dont actually think he should kill the rogues or whatever#but the question there is. Are you fine with the future victims your decisions will cause?#Are their lives worth the slim chance any of these people will get better?#batman says yes theyre worth it. red hood says no theyre not.#thats the fundamental moral difference there#its why jason challenges the batman status quo#which is why he cant be harnessed well after his initial return bc comics can never truly escape that status quo#anyway i sure am having some thoughts for someone not that smart so if you disagree please tell me!!! just be civil or ill just block you <#...anyway this is another thing BTAS succeeds in bc i always feel like yes these villains do deserve yet another chance#despite what theyve done. bruce's belief in them doesnt feel stupid and naive#its abt what you yourself can live with. bruce can live w the deaths of the ppl the criminals he doesnt get rid of kill#and jason can live with killing those criminals and preventing further victims
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honestly i don't think sqq (jiu) would have minded the accusations of preferential treatment from yqy if they'd felt true. like as children he guarded the title of being yue qi's Favorite with teeth and claws. why shouldn't he be given preferential treatment? everyone ought to know just who qi-ge likes and trusts over everyone else. and for good fucking reason--who else here is watching out for qi-ge? as peak lords he's literally 2nd in command and chief tactician, if yqy values his word over yours, then its both what makes most sense and also what he deserves.
the thing is that to sqq, being accused of being favoured by yqy over others now just feels like a sick joke, because obviously (to him) that's not the fucking case. if he actually gave him preferential treatment you'd think he'd listen to what he has to fucking say, instead of believing what anyone else tells him about sqq. you'd think, if he was yqy's favorite, he wouldn't have left him to rot.
so i think, in a setting where they reconcile after becoming peak lords, that sqq would very much slap yqy's love for him in everyones faces as a kind of power move. a kind of, "oh, you thought that was favouritism? you havent seen yet what it looks like when qi-ge lets himself favour someone."
#svsss#shen jiu#may be related to the chapter of mott im editing rn#i mean at the end of the day what sj wants more than anything is love and security. and this soothes both of those needs#so long as sqq knows his place in yqy's heart i think he would not think twice about brandishing it to make a point#there is great power to be had in making sure everyone knows that the most powerful man in the world is your loyal dog#its just so funny to me to imagine post getting together qijiu like#other peak lord: zhangmen-shixiong is showing preferential treatment!!#yqy: yes <3#also i think sj is the kind of person who would think “if im going to be punished then at least i should do something worth punishing”#which is self-sabotaging behaviour at its core but sj is all about the self-sabotaging baby!!#at least if youre punished for something you did you know what you did wrong (get caught)#theres a kind of helpless anger in being punished for things that arent true/your fault that i think drives sj fucking insane
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wip (it's one of the frames for the animatic)
#yes the animatic will be all in colors#i have... whoa i'll have a lot of work to do with that one haha#it'll be so worth it tho!!!!!!!!#i drew adam like 150 times these past few days for that animatic auihbgekijuhg#hazbin hotel#adam#hazbin hotel adam#myart
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If you need me, I'll bе in my coffin You could come knocking, and I'll raise hell for you
#had this in my mind for too long#and I sacrificed three hours of sleep for this#was it worth it?#ye.#at least i hope so. let's see of I hate this tomorrow morning#song is: Will Wood - Vampire Reference In A Minor Key#for all my non will wood enjoyers: you should become one#doctor who#dw fanart#dw#dr who#doctor who fanart#10th doctor#tenth doctor#tenmartha#martha jones#martha jones fanart#northernfire art
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you were raised in comparison.
it wasn't always obvious (well. except for the times that it was), but you internalized it young. you had to eat what you didn't like, other people are going hungry, and you should be grateful. you had to suck it up and walk on the twisted ankle, it wasn't broken, you were just being a baby. you were never actually suffering, people obviously had it worse than you did.
you had a roof over your head - imagine! with the way you behaved, with how you talked back to your parents? you're lucky they didn't kick you out on your ass. they had friends who had to deal with that. hell, you have friends who had to deal with that. and how dare you imply your father isn't there for you - just because he doesn't ever actually talk to you and just because he's completely emotionally checked out of your life doesn't mean you're not fucking lucky. think about your cousins, who don't even get to speak to their dad. so what if yours has a mean streak; is aggressive and rude. at least you have a father to be rude to you.
you really think you're hurting? you were raised in a home! you had access to clean water! you never so much as came close to experiencing a real problem. sure, okay. you have this "mental illness" thing, but teenagers are always depressed, right. it's a phase, you'll move on with your life.
what do you mean you feel burnt out at work. what do you mean you mean you never "formed healthy coping mechanisms?" we raised you better than that. you were supposed to just shoulder through things. to hold yourself to high expectations. "burning out" is for people with real jobs and real stress. burnout is for people who have sick kids and people who have high-paying jobs and people who are actually experiencing something difficult. recently you almost cried because you couldn't find your fucking car keys. you just have lost your sense of gratitude, and honestly, we're kind of hurt. we tell you we love you, isn't that enough? if you want us to stick around, you need to be better about proving it. you need to shut up about how your mental health is ruined.
it could be worse! what if you were actually experiencing executive dysfunction. if you were really actually sick, would you even be able to look at things on the internet about it? you just spend too much time on webMD. you just like to freak yourself out and feel like you belong to something. you just like playing the victim. this is always how you have been - you've always been so fucking dramatic. you have no idea how good you have it - you're too fucking sensitive.
you were like, maybe too good of a kid. unwilling to make a real fuss. and the whole time - the little points, the little validations - they went unnoticed. it isn't that you were looking for love, specifically - more like you'd just wanted any one person to actually listen. that was all you'd really need. you just needed to be witnessed. it wasn't that you couldn't withstand the burden, but you did want to know that anyone was watching. these days, you are so accustomed to the idea of comparison - you don't even think you belong in your own communities. someone always fits better than you do. you're always the outlier. they made these places safe, and then you go in, and you are just not... quite the same way that would actually-fit.
you watch the little white ocean of your numbness lap at your ankles. the tide has been coming in for a while, you need to do something about it. what you want to do is take a nap. what you want to do is develop some kind of time machine - it's not like you want your life to stop, not completely, but it would really nice if you could just get everything to freeze, just for a little while, just until you're finished resting. but at least you're not the worst you've been. at least you have anything. you're so fucking lucky. do you have any concept of the amount of global suffering?
a little ant dies at the side of your kitchen sink. you look at its strange chitinous body and think - if you could just somehow convince yourself it is enough, it will finally be enough and you can be happy. no changes will have to be made. you just need to remember what you could lose. what is still precious to you.
you can't stop staring at the ant. you could be an ant instead of a person, that is how lucky you are. it's just - you didn't know the name of the ant, did you. it's just - ants spend their whole life working, and never complain. never pull the car over to weep.
it's just - when it died, it curled up into a tight little ball.
something kind of uncomfortable: you do that when you sleep.
#writeblr#warm up#my dad was actively doing bad shit to us and we STILL were told we were lucky . and to a point i do think im lucky#i just think also there's somethin to be said about like. how about we stop using comparison to dismiss ppls individual struggles#yes there are people who have no perspective. for the reference tho having perspective actually made me really unwilling to get help#for what was a serious and debilitating mental health issue. bc i thought i didnt DESERVE IT#and i would rather have 600 ppl who aren't THAT bad get help and get heard and get seen#than make any 1 kid. do the math that i did: look at the world that is dying and the people who are hurting and say#''oh. okay. others have it worse. they are probably better people than i am. i am being unreasonable. i cannot ask for help#i am not good. i am taking too much space. i am not worth saving.''#bc our WHOLE lives we are taught a scarcity mindset - that you can 'steal' from someone. so that instead of changing a system that doesn't#actually offer fair support to everyone#we put the impetus on the individual to just... demand less.#and here's something - there are probably ppl who think i DIDNT deserve to get help#bc i DID have it better than other people#and something about that is ... so sickening. bc i think all of us in some way at some point WILL need help.#we were supposed to make communities. we were supposed to offer our hands. we were supposed to raise the barn#instead we said: it could be worse. now handle it yourself
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My biggest beef with the way Annabeth was written in the show is that I think Rick fell into his own trap. Like his whole thing with Annabeth is that just because someone doesn’t look smart doesn’t mean they aren’t. And while it’s about their literal looks for both the show and the book, book Annabeth also sometimes acted in ways that people wouldn’t stereotypically associate with “smart” because I think we’ve all be condition to think bbc sherlock no emotions genius is the only way to be smart. Book Annabeth acts super flustered around Luke because she's a kid and she has a crush on him, she's afraid of spiders, and wanted to see the arch just because she thought it was cool. In general book Annabeth is allowed to be sillier and have a wider range of emotions than show Annabeth without it detracting from the fact that Annabeth is smart. I find this whole "stoic genius" idea is often used to put down teenage girls for being dumb and superficial just because they show emotions and the only way to beat it is to be cold, calculating, and emotionless and most people just aren't like that.
#Like on a personal note I was in robotics in high school#And all the other kids were juniors and seniors and also male#And they would bully me so bad for liking anything remotely girly or being emotional#And I was really trying to earn their respect because I wanted to captain next year#And the only way I felt I could do that was by supressing everything#And I remember relating so hard to Annabeth and being jealous of her because she acted basically the way I did#But nobody thought she was dumb or not worth leading a quest because of it#like yes percy bullies her a little lol but at the end of the day he doesn't question her wisdom#pjo show crit#annabeth chase#pjotv spoilers
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Tragedy enjoyers when there’s not one, not two, but three combinations of tragic relationships at the center of the narrative AND they’re bisexual
#yes this is about wicked#but feel free to make it about anything else you want it to be#yes I’m thinking about wicked bc of the film but#this is largely just the concept of wicked#anyway. thinking about the tragedy of the core three#they’re so tragic bisexual polycule to me#elphaba x fieryo? ✋🏻😩🤚🏻#elphaba x glinda? ✋🏻😩😩🤚🏻#glinda x elphaba x fieryo?? ✋🏻😩😩😩🤚🏻#hilariously glinda x fieryo is a paring I think only works romantically pre-the force elphaba wrecks in their life#like once they’ve both been Irrevocably Changed By Elphaba I don’t think it works anymore#but the two are forever intertwined with each other and are important to the other. I just don’t think it’s romantic (whatever that’s worth)#anyway. BWAH!!!#thinking about Glinda… thinking about Glinda in no one mourns the wicked… and her blank in what happened to elphaba and fieryo#ok rambling tags over. content tags now#wicked#wicked the musical#wicked the movie#wicked 2024#elphaba thropp#elphaba wicked#hey who was gonna tell me I’ve been spelling fiyeros name wrong this whole time#glinda the good witch#glinda upland#galinda upland#fiyero tigelaar#glinda x elphaba#fiyero x elphaba#elphaba x glinda x fiyero#glinda x elphaba x fiyero
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so i live in an apartment and we have a trash room on each floor where you throw your trash and shit and its 11pm and im like ok i need to take out the recycling, let me see if theres room in the bin (cause people over fill it all the time), and so i walk down to the trash room to check, right? and people will leave just shit theyre getting rod of outside of the trash room that doesnt fit in the room and anyone can take it and usually its like boxes that are too big and like the occasional shelf.
so you could imagine my surprise when i peek down and see a desk chair. a printer, still with paper in it. the handlebars of a children's bike. an entire ikea bag stuffed full of clothes. a broken table. and not one, not two, but three flat screen tvs.
i am concerned about my neighbors.
#worth also pointing out that i do not know a single person on this floor#yes ive lived here for a year thats irrlevant#should people know who their neighbors are cause i dont#not a tag#from saph#all that and i didnt check if there was room in the recycling because i was so thrown off
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