#they’re so tragic bisexual polycule to me

[aforgottenthing]

Tragedy enjoyers when there’s not one, not two, but three combinations of tragic relationships at the center of the narrative AND they’re bisexual

[bandtrees]

tell me about milton the presidential pool boy

SEND ME A CHARACTER AND I'LL...

OFC <3 i will do these solidly in uh... the order i remember to :D yay. milt is the perfect character to do this with though because my highly specific headcanon realities for him in particular are UNMATCHED. UNDER A READMORE—

Sexuality Headcanon: BISEXUAL ICON. also polyamorous of course, and objectum - which is obviously not a feeling he has words for but it’s part of what drives his initial attraction to marla and callum, his attraction to the objects in particular while they’re a novelty. i figured it would be an interesting segue into him being desperate to keep his ‘human’ face if it already stuck out in their relationship - but in a way he finds hot, lol. til it’s not anymore of course.

fun fact, in my milton fic that lays out a lot of what i basically imagine for him, i scrapped a line during him and callum’s arguments that would have been, in response to callum becoming more obsessed with the dialup/innovation overall, him trying to reassure callum that he would’ve loved him even without his object head - but of course he wouldn’t be able to lie like that, and would hold his tongue. it would’ve been a parallel to the last milt/marla scene, buuut i couldnt find a place to squeeze it in, lol.

Gender Headcanon: plain ol cisgender gentleman 👍

A ship I have with said character: WHITE HOUSE POLYCULE MY BELOVED. i am so very fond of callum+milt+marla you have no idea the mental illness i gave myself with them. i am a huge sucker for polyamorous ships and the amount of tragic potential with literally every combination of these three drives me fucking insane.

A BROTP I have with said character: i am sure him and norm would have a lot to talk about if they ever were to personally meet, lol.

A NOTP I have with said character: ...well here’s the thing about that. jokes aside though, if i can cheat and say “an existing interpretation of a ship i do like”, i do love callum/milt a lot, but i am specifically really not into the interpretation that it was an affair situation. for a lot of reasons - only one of them is that i’m as attached to the polyamory headcanon as i am. for starters, dubious a figure as he is, i don’t think callum would Do That, both morally and because i think a lot of his personality revolves around the fact that he only really views his life in service to other people and i can’t see him being that underhanded unless it was for a cause he really thought was just. when i think the problem with him is that he abandons his personal relationships for those causes.

that and, like… it just sidelines marla in a way i don’t like. dialtown, all my love to it, kind of already has a problem with its gender ratios and such and i don’t think regaling the female character in the equation to a beard or “The Wife” or whatever is fair — not to say i think every woman has to be shipped, but i just find her having an active role in callum+milt’s relationship way more interesting than any alternative. let her fujosh it out smh. plus i’m bisexual and will always take a well-thought out m/f ship over m/m ships that are just kinda there.

A random headcanon: lax as he appears, especially compared to callum, he has a lot of resentment in that weird little heart of his. he has an obsessive attachment to his own humanity, in a “weathered and it’s all i have” sense — being in wars made it so he felt a lot of his body wasn’t his own, but he wasn’t prepared to ‘lose’ it to the dialup, either. in a world where callum managed to actually force him to get an object head, he still would’ve committed suicide… after taking crown down with him, of course.

i also like stylizing him as having a black censor bar in place of a face :] with his trademark lil hat visible ofc lol.

General Opinion over said character: I REALLY REALLY REALLY REALLY REALLY FUCKING LIKE HIM. both my insanely specific headcanons and the framework that dogman themself has put down for him. he’s very interesting and some of the bleakest dialtown’s story has gotten - which inherently intrigues me a lot. i think he has potential for a perspective on dt’s story we really don’t see that much of - that being how the dialup must have felt at the time, and how genuinely horrifying it would have been.

i also, for a while - and this is really ironic coming from me - really really did not like milton. not for anything to actually do with him - i just really liked callum crown and, before learning who milton was, was incensed that so many people seemed to be more attached to what i thought was a throwaway name than his actual lore, lol. now i know better of course. now i have become fucking insane, at that

⬆ I LIKE HIM VERY MUCH

[markantonys]

WOT sims shenanigans part 2!

remember how mat and elayne kept interrupting their initial getting together flirting to throw water balloons at each other? well, IMMEDIATELY after rand and aviendha had their first kiss, they ended the conversation so aviendha could do pushups and rand could build a sandcastle. we stan 4 useless bisexuals.

then they went home and fucked woohooed in elayne’s bed because neither of them had a double bed. i’m sure elayne didn’t mind!

elayne and avi got together as well, so the rand/mat/elayne/avi polycule is complete! i moved them all into a new apartment together (now they all have double beds! rip to rand and mat’s bunkbeds in the old household) and rand immediately wished to have a child. if coming down with baby fever one (1) hour after moving in with his partners isn’t a rand move, i don’t know what is.

look how soft 🥺

if one person walks in on 2 of their partners woohooing, or is walked in on by their partner, they don’t care at all. but since mat and avi are the only ones without a romantic relationship, they both get embarrassed if one walks in on the other with rand or elayne (tho rand and elayne do not get embarrassed). there are boundaries in this house that need to be respected, thank you!

i did not realize until looking at them from this angle and in these outfits what Fantastic asses sim rand and elayne have 😳 yes i’m the one who created the sims, but i didn’t pay attention to ass size while i was doing it jkfjg i just picked default body types and did some minor tweaks. i’ve now gone to inspect mat’s and avi’s asses and they’re both flat as pancakes rip

i gave mat the goofball trait which means that he WILL NOT STOP pranking toilets (unless i catch him in time to stop him). half the time he’s the first one to use a toilet he pranked and then gets mad when the toilet breaks. karma.

the Lan Thirdwheeling On Randlayne saga continues:

perrin and faile’s wedding was a hot mess. it started like 4 hours late because i was waiting for rand, mat, and elayne, who never showed up. (at this time i was controlling the other WOT household rather than the polycule household, so i couldn’t make those 3 come to the wedding.) and mat was the best man and elayne the maid of honor 💀 elayne is barely over the line between friends and acquaintances with faile but is still faile’s highest relationship after perrin, which is tragically canon lmao. and rand was supposed to be the flower girl again! how could he dip on his flower girl duties!

during this waiting time, gawyn went to cry under the bedcovers because he was depressed from Fear Of Unfulfilled Dreams and aviendha took a mudbath, facemask and all. clearly she’s been spending too much time with elayne. but what else are you supposed to do to destress from showing up at the wedding of your partners’ friends whom you barely know and then being abandoned there because your partners ditched?

half the guests didn’t watch the ceremony but came running to get cake afterwards. then nynaeve just threw out the whole cake after only a few people had taken slices.

finally, here’s egwene deciding to boogey down right in the middle of perrin and faile’s first dance. (not pictured: perrin dropping faile mid-dip, which gave her an angry moodlet jkfgjh)

date night!

breaking news: mat and aviendha have developed a small romance bar! fascinating. i was playing this household the whole time and controlling their every move yet have no idea when or how that happened. maybe they were in flirty group conversations with rand and/or elayne often enough that it ended up giving them romance points with each other as well. for now i’m thinking i won’t encourage it but i won’t make them friendzone each other either, and instead i’ll just see if anything happens. in the last post i was saying how sim mat keeps trying to seduce people without me telling him to or catching him in time to stop him and he’s gone and done it again! lucille bluth shouting whore out the car window.gif

lan called elayne to say that he was feeling down in the dumps and i picked the “try to cheer him up” option and got this dialogue 🥺 the friendship we didn’t know we needed!

i have a glitch lately where sometimes it doesn’t notify you when a sim’s needs get too low, so rand died of starvation because i didn’t even know he was hungry at all 😭 thankfully, i quit without saving and then immediately fed him when i restarted the game, so he is okay now! can’t believe rand was suffering in silence to such an extreme that he literally died before i noticed anything was wrong. painfully canon!

a few sim days later, the same thing happened to mat! on christmas! while he was holding a plate of food and about to start eating it! gawyn sobbed his eyes out over mat’s dead body while everyone else, including mat’s partners, gathered around to look at the corpse but just kept calmly eating christmas dinner and didn’t care at all. i quit without saving again so mat is alive again, but i’ll never forget that gawyn was the only one who cried over his death djfgj gold star for gawyn

the polycule is engaged!!! i love Love!!! so many proposals! you can see the sun progressively setting because it took so long to do all the proposals lmao. my favorite is elayne proposing to rand while mat dicks around on his phone and avi does situps. tune in in a couple weeks for the polycule wedding! and let’s have a prayer circle for it to run more smoothly than perrin and faile’s, but given the number of ceremonies i’m going to try to cram into one wedding event, i’m foreseeing an even bigger hot mess!

[gilmores-glorious-blog]

ahhHhHhHHh okay so i finished the legend of vox machina (or at least everything that’s out*) and i have!!!!!!! so many fucking emotions!!!! i may or may not be Very Fucking Obsessed,,,

anyways,, assorted Thoughts and Feelings so that i don’t just spam fifty posts in a row about this silly little show:

- vax is!! the love of my life!!!!!!!! i love dark and mysterious rogues who are actually just dumb boys that are full of love 🥺🥺 ……. but also i was looking up his character and learned that he dies so 🙃 that’s really fun for me 🙃🙃 why does every character i love die tragically??! 😩😩 (but yeah i watched the campaign scenes of his death and i possibly teared up a bit,,,,)

- scanlan supremacy i love bards so goddamn much 😩😩 i love that he’s a stereotypical Horny Bard (who is definitely bisexual i don’t make the rules) but he also has so much depth to his character and the angst— love me a character with self-worth issues because haha SAME !! not ready for him just fucking leaving the party though (if that part gets animated) because i would :( miss him very much :,(

- also on a scanlan note his crush on pike is!! the cutest fucking thing!!! it’s a little sad because it really doesn’t seem reciprocated to me (and also aroace pike supremacy 😌) but it’s still so wholesome and cute nonetheless. (when she showed up to save their asses and he just went “marry me? 🥺😍🤩🥺”,,, i’m love him,,,,)

- percy is HOT as FUCK (although let’s be honest, the only party member i don’t find at least a little attractive is grog) and i’m obsessed with him. i love fucked up guys with incredibly traumatizing backstories <3 he can be a bit too edgy for me sometimes though, i just want to gently take his guns away and wrap him in a warm blanket and give him a hug so that he doesn’t have to be all angsty all the time

- on a specific percy angst note: WHEN HE WAS TALKING ABOUT THE PEPPERBOX AND SCANLAN ASKED WHO THE SIXTH SLOT WAS FOR AND PERCY’S SHADOW POINTED THE GUN AT HIMSELF I— 😩😩😭😭😭😭 this isn’t okay what the fuck :,(

- like every piece of media ever, i have decided that the party is basically one big polycule. the twins are definitely both in love with percy and he also has a thing for both of them, and keyleth likes both the twins and vax likes her back. can’t decide if vex likes her too or just flirts with her but either way i love them. also scanlan has tried to seduce everyone in the group at least once (except keyleth because no),,, the only person it worked with was vax because i have a strong vax and scanlan exes agenda.

- perc’ahlia is just the bi for bi couple,, they’re both so hot 😩😩👀 literally everytime he calls her by her full name or she calls him percival and/or darling i just,,,,,, hhHhHhHhHhHhH hot people.

- the music in this show is everything to me,, the theme music Unlocks Emotions and all of scanlan’s songs are my favorite things ever i’m mad at sam riegal for having such a goddamn beautiful voice how dare scanlan’s silly little songs awaken things in me

- on the same note… my favorite song is just “the legend of vox machina” for many reasons but especially because i love the violent transition from “oh yeah haha here’s our dumb and silly big guy!! ☺️✌️” to “this man has a fucking GUN and he will blow your FUCKING BRAINS OUT with it” and back to “here’s the lovely nature girl 😌🍃”

- i’m suing for the emotional damage caused by the death of Merry-Brandybuck-But-He’s-A-Dwarf-Now-And-Also-Gay-With-Percy-De Rolo

- final note isn’t actually related to the show but i’ve been watching some scenes from the campaign and i am losing my entire mind over the bathtub scene holy fucking shit,,, the genius,, the comedic timing,,, laura bailey, liam o’brien, and taliesin jaffe are my goddamn heroes 😩😩

anYWAYS sorry for the long-as-fuck post but my brain…… it’s rotting………

*i started making this post last night lol,, i’ve now watched the new episodes but i have too many thoughts from those three episodes alone to add to this already essay length post