#so what if when grian is getting frustrated that none of his builds are going right… scar takes him on a little interactive tour and they

[rosaacicularis]

god thinking terribly about grian and scar basing next to each other…. (again)

[t4t4tclethian]

Joel wakes up in his bed, safe and sound. What? Wasn't he- oh, right. He died again. Damn. That sucks. He'd been so sure that he'd get xB that time. Oh, also, ouch. Every muscle in his body aches , even when he's laying down and not doing anything, and he knows in his bones that getting up is going to suck majorly. Note to self: don't die by falling ever again, it's awful .

About ten minutes of laying-down-in-the-same-spot-with-nothing-to-do, Joel is finally bored enough to try and move. He gets up ( ow. ) and goes through his regular post-revival routine of stretching out the cramps and checking himself over to make sure that Scar's weird bootleg soul magic hasn't rearranged anything important again. No parts missing? Every limb where it's supposed to be (and attached the right way- that life had been a nightmare and a half)? Are all of his joints and muscles functioning correctly? Miraculously, he's able to conclude a "yes" to all of those questions.

Okay, and now that that's all settled, it's time to get back to the RAGE BURNING THROUGH EVERY MOLECULE OF JOEL'S BODY. HE DIED AND IT WAS STUPID AND HE'S STUPID AND HE'S SO UPSET ABOUT THIS. (Well, more accurately, Joel's feeling an exquisite blend of frustration, annoyance, indignation, and embarrassment, all presenting as anger but with very little true rage to be found. But Joel's never been one for those finer details, so-) OH MY GOD HE'S SO BLUMMIN' MAD.

Why is that? What reasons could Joel possibly have to be so mad? Well, let's see:

He fell off a flipping rooftop. And it killed him. God, what an embarassing way to die.

Joel fell because he probably DOES have a crush on xB.

There's also almost no way xB likes him back.

It also pisses him off that this is even remotely a concern in his mind.

Now Joel's the hitman who got a crush on his mark! It's humiliating! How's he supposed to show his face around anyone ever again?

Grian was right the whole time, and if he ever finds out he will never stop rubbing it in Joel's face ever. He can't live like that.

(Honestly, Grian being right is probably the worst part of this whole AWFUL situation. All Joel can do is try and keep this fact from him as long as possible.)

Joel takes a deep breath, and stands in front of the door from his room into the Magic Mountain common room. He'd died on a mission, meaning the rest of the team has definitely reviewed the footage by now, and probably prepared their best roasting material. He's in for a world of teasing, but as long as he keeps his head and doesn't let it slip he has a chance of making it out of here. No point stalling, he thinks, as he opens the door and steps out into the breakroom. Might as well get it over with.

The common area is silent as Joel walks out of his room. Not because the room is empty, of course- Joel's never so lucky that something like that could happen to him- it's just that none of his "friends" can decide how to bully him first. Surprisingly, Mumbo is the first one to break the silence this time.

"Hey, Joel, have you seen Jellie around lately?"

Well, that's obviously bait for a joke, but honestly he's got no clue where Mumbo's going with this. Might as well bite.

"No, why do you ask?"

"Well, um, uh, it's just," Mumbo fumbles for a reply- he likely hadn't expected to make it this far- but he continues valiantly onwards. "Cats always land on their feet, right? So I think maybe you should ask her for some lessons."

And with a howl of laughter from Grian and an indignant splutter from Joel, the Roasting of the Beans is officially under way. Oh joy.

"It looks like our buddy Beans here fell for xB in more ways than one!"

"What does that make? Like, twelve deaths in a row now?"

"More like fourteen!"

"Y'know, if you really do want lessons, I'm sure Jellie would be happy to-"

"He waved at you! He probably knew you were there before he even stepped out of the building, dude!"

"I've never seen anyone miss a shot harder in all my life."

"Yeah, I've seen better shooting from Scar!"

"Well, now, hold on, I'm a plenty good shot! I could HotGuy you right now, just watch-"

"No, NO- PUT THAT AWAY, SCAR! I am not letting you get blood all over these carpets again!"

And so, as it usually does when all seven Mountaineers are in the same room, the post-death roasting devolves into chaos. Even so, Grian still has one last zinger for Joel before he joins Skizz and Mumbo in trying to wrestle Scar's shotgun out of his hands.

"So, what are you going to try next, Tomato Boy? "

Tomato Boy? That was a new one. Where'd Grian come up with that one? Joel's confusion must be visible on his face, because Gem takes pity and disengages from the active combat zone to pull him aside to watch the footage. He’s not quite sure why- didn’t he live through the whole thing? How could watching it be better than actually having done it?

After watching the drone footage for himself, Joel can officially conclude that oh God it’s so much worse. The whole hit had been so sloppy that if he hadn’t known better, Joel would’ve thought one of those Neighborhood amateurs had done it! Of course his shot hadn’t hit xB- he’d been so distracted that his shots had gone completely wild, closer to hitting a nearby pigeon instead of the man he’d been actually aiming for. And the rooftop vantage point he’d been so proud of was so obvious! No wonder xB had spotted it so easily- Joel’s pretty sure a blind badger could’ve seen him up there! Then, like the cherry- or, really, the tomato - on top of a perfect shame smoothie: Joel had actually blushed , BRIGHT RED, LIKE A TOMATO, at xB’s smile before plummeting off of the roof. And then going splat. Like a tomato.

Joel turns away from the screen in shame and disgust. The others were right to bully him. The whole world should be bullying him. This is horrendous , and Joel’s never related more to his own mangled corpse. Sounds start up behind him, like Gem’s resumed the video to rewatch it one last time.

“Turn it off,” He begs her, wincing at how pathetic he sounds. “ Please. ”

Gem’s eyes twinkle with knowing mischief. “Are you sure?” She asks with a shit-eating grin. “Because riiight after this part, there’s a really sweet moment where xB grabs a sheet from inside and uses it to cover up your body…”

At that, Joel perks up slightly, barely enough to be noticeable. XB had cared enough about him to go out of his way to cover up his body? And then he remembers that 1) if he hadn’t just botched the sloppiest of all contract killings, xB would’ve been too dead to cover Joel’s corpse, 2) this is pathetic-loser-with-an-obvious-crush behavior, and if he has to deal with “crush” he should at least be trying to drop the “pathetic,” “loser,” and “obvious” bits, and 3) Gem’s been watching him like a hawk this whole time. She definitely knows, and if Gem knows, then it’s only a matter of time before the others do, too. And “others” means Grian . Oh he’s so doomed and everything is terrible.

Joel buries his face in his hands in a vain attempt to hide from his shame, and groans, “Just kill me again, please. I can’t live with this.”

Scar (who Joel had honestly forgotten was even in the room) hears his request and happily obliges, whipping out his pistol and shooting Joel point-blank. And then again a couple more times for good measure. As he falls to the floor in agony, Joel welcomes the blissful indifference of death- anything to get out of that conversation.

The moment Joel realizes he has a crush on xB is, objectively, quite a funny one. He’d almost certainly be laughing about it if it had been anyone else. As it is, though, he’s hopping mad, extremely indignant, and deeply embarrassed about the whole thing. Who ever heard of a hitman falling for their mark? (Well, a lot of people have- it’s a whole romance cliche for a reason. But it wasn’t supposed to actually happen!)

(ao3 link)

————————————————

It had all started a few days earlier, when Joel had been hanging out with the other Magical Mountaineers in the breakroom. Gem and Impulse were poring over some papers together, Skizz was on a phone call in the corner, Mumbo was politely watching as Scar fumbled through some magic tricks, and Grian was sitting on the couch with Joel, listening to him rant about his failures at killing xB (he’d drawn the short straw). Everything was normal.

And then, when Joel paused his tirade to take a breath, Grian said those fatal words. “From the way you talk about this guy, Joel, it’s almost like you’ve got a crush on the mark!”

Which was ridiculous, of course! He does blummin’ not, thank you! His relationship with xB was a perfectly platonic contract killing, and Joel is a professional! He knows better than to fall for his target, and he indignantly tells Grian as much.

But, of course, Grian is Grian, and the second he senses he’s touched a nerve he doubles down. And so he did.

“Contract killing? Give me a break, Joel! Your contract on this guy expired ages ago, and you’re not the type to work for free.” Grian’s eyes twinkled with mischief as he continued to needle at Joel. “Admit it, there’s something else going on here, isn’t there?”

Joel spluttered, and took a deep breath as he glanced around the room. Fuck. Everyone had stopped what they were doing to listen in on him and Grian now. He had to say something to throw them off or he would never be able to live this conversation down.

“My contract might be done, but unlike some people I finish the things I start, thank you very much!”

Grian squawked in indignation, and as he did so the others chuckled and turned back to their own conversations, unfounded accusations of romance forgotten. Grian’s tendency to leave things unfinished was well-known, and something that every assassin at Magic Mountain had teased him over many times.

But that thought refused to leave his brain. It had wiggled its way in like a worm. Did he have a crush on xB? Is that why he kept coming back when any sane person would’ve just given it up already? And the answer, of course, is no. All of Joel’s actions here have perfectly reasonable and professional explanations.

————————————————————

Joel waits patiently on the rooftop across from Horse Head Farmer’s Market (which, despite the name, is actually a grocery store/money laundering scheme, not a farmer’s market), rifle at the ready, just as he has been for the past three and a half hours. You can’t rush a good sniping, after all, and xB’s schedule varies enough that Joel’s never quite sure when he’ll head out for lunch. (He’s pretty sure xB has done this specifically to spite Joel- the guy’s obsessed with him.)

Yes! Finally! xB steps out of the store, starts walking down the street, and- turns to look at Joel’s rooftop, makes direct eye contact with him, and gives him a friendly little wave, the infuriatingly sincere kind that makes Joel want to kill him even more. Dammit. He’s been caught. Also, wow, even from here Joel is a little wowed by how blue xB’s eyes are. Or maybe he’s just remembering how they look, because there’s no way Joel can actually see his eyes from here. They are definitely a very nice blue, though, and oh, huh, Joel realizes that Lizzie has blue eyes, too. Maybe he’s got a thing for blue-eyed people, and- OH SHIT RIGHT HE’S KILLING THIS GUY.

Joel fires, because even if he’s been discovered a vantage point is still a vantage point. Of course, xB somehow manages to not be in the bullet’s path, just like he always does, and then he gives Joel a disapproving look, like he’s actually disappointed Joel didn’t do a better job at trying to kill him.

God, he’s so cute, Joel’s brain has the audacity to think, like it’s trying to add insult to insult to injury. To Joel’s horror, he realizes in this moment that he’s had dozens, maybe even hundreds of thoughts like this, that just slipped through the cracks and went unnoticed.

Then, xB smiles at him again before heading on his way, and Joel falls off of the rooftop. He has time to think, Oh, I’m gonna kill Grian, as he plummets towards the ground. And then, everything goes dark, and he dies.

[redwinterroses]

Good morning.

What if Martyn (in-character) was lying when he said that the Last Lifers had the memories of 3rd Life but not the attached emotions. What if they just weren't supposed to. What if they were all told "Yeah, you won't feel any of the same bonds, that's a feature not a bug" and then they log into the game and--

Wait what's going on why do they all remember 3rd Life with just as much intensity as they did before -- maybe more because they're back in this world? Something is very, very wrong--

So they all hide it. Suppress it. Because none of them realize it's happening to the others too. And that's why we get Scott unable to resist giving Jimmy a poppy. And no one quite trusting Impulse. And Scar and Grian constantly gravitating back toward each other.

And Ren.

Ren, who knows he's not supposed to be remembering this stuff, who thinks something might be wrong with him. Is this the boogey curse? He doesn't know what that feels like. Maybe this is boogey curse. But he doesn't want to kill anyone... he wants to regather his allies. Skizz, and Etho, and... Martyn. Oh this is very bad he is definitely not supposed to be feeling like Dogwarts is returning. He needs to isolate himself. Build a farm. Get food. Build a grumpy tower. Be alone. Don't shuffle toward Martyn every time the group is together. Resist the urge to protect and expect protection. That's not how this works. Something is wrong with him. He needs to get away from everyone, in case this is part of the boogey curse.

Meanwhile Martyn is furious. He also remembers Dogwarts and everything that went with it and he can't afford to be messed up this time. He didn't know the stakes in Third Life. Now he does. Now he does. He can't afford to want to protect Ren, to team with Etho, to trust Skizz. He's got to get away from all of them. He can't afford those weaknesses, not if he's going to win. So he teams with the Southlands -- some of his bitterest enemies from last time, and if it looks like he has to stab them all in the back, well. Nothing wrong with feeling a little satisfaction about that.

But then Ren sets his tower on fire.

He doesn't know why he does it. He sees Martyn on the horizon and something snaps. He doesn't want to be here, he doesn't want to be alone, he doesn't want to be separated from his allies, the men he would still fight and die for. He hates this tower, hates every stone of it, every plank that isn't Dogwarts, that wasn't built with friends, that doesn't protect anything because what is there to protect? So in a moment of breaking frustration, he flicks the lighter and it all starts going up in flames.

He regrets it the minute the smoke starts to choke him, of course -- he hasn't thought this through. He needs to get out. This is -- this is how Etho died, isn't it? Though even Etho wasn't alone. He's got to get out, he needs to--

And then Martyn is there, shouting at him and putting the fire out and Ren is coughing and there are tears in his eyes -- from the smoke, only the smoke -- and his paws are singed and why does he feel so glad because Martyn is shouting at him and oh. There's something in Martyn's voice. An anger that he hadn't expected. And the Red King looks at his Hand through bleary eyes and Martyn meets his gaze and they realize at the same time:

They're not alone. They remember. Either something is wrong with both of them, or they were lied to. Martyn, bitterly, thinks he knows the answer.

They'll have to be careful. You never know who's listening. Who's... watching. So they can't say anything outright. But. There are no rules about new alliances, right? As long as they never outright mention Dogwarts. As long as it's a secret that hides between words, they can circumvent the rules. What are rules to lying gods? The Watchers deserve to be tricked. Let them do what they will.

So the shadows rise. And if the handclasp Martyn offers Ren is the old Dogwarts greeting, who's to say? Maybe this time will be different. Or if it's not, at least they're not alone.

[wixelt]

just went through the entire hermitphipia au and cannot stop thinking about the hermits driving Andrias absolutely insane

Zedaph seems to make contraptions with the sole purpose of them accomplishing a net zero or acting to detriment but with every contraption they get at least one discovery that revolutionizes their technology out of the principals so he ends up being too valuable an asset to not give unlimited funding and a tram do document everything he builds or any experiments he conducts

Andrias thinks Impulse is one of the more reasonable ones and possibly capable of keeping the others in line so he assigns some of the troublemakers under him not realizing that these are the exact people he is only responsible enough around to assure none of them die (we're talking either ZIT, Boatem, Soup Squad, or all of the above)

Keeping Grian occupied becomes a top priority quickly, and soon extends to nearly the entire 26

When Xisuma shows up, Andrias thinks he finally has someone who can handle the others' mischief. Upon learning that while Admin is short for administrator, Xisuma does not, in fact, administrate the hermits but instead the world they settle on, he is both disappointed and concerned on multiple accounts, one of which being this guy is apparently a God in certain realities and that is a problem for the plan.

Joe Hills

Andrias ties himself in mental knots trying to predict these strangers. Marcy & Mumbo were both easy to understand, even if the latter still regularly baffles him.

But add more than 20 other varied, chaotic humanoids to the mix & everything's on fire again as he & the Core try to work out not just Hermits' individual quirks, but also the unique chaos that stems from certain Hermit combos.

His saving grace should've been that he's introduced to them gradually as they reunite one by one, but he has the disadvantage of meeting Mumbo first, who on his own is chaotic but in a benign way Andrias has quickly adapted to & can manipulate, if only by nudging the spoon as needed.

But then Anne Boonchuy & the Plantars rock up to Newtopia with False & Grian (& maybe others, but definitely those 2 at minimum), & Andrias sees bumbling Mumbo become a nonsensical prankster with one braincell to share just by being in earshot of this force of chaos in red.

But friends bring out different sides to a person, so that's expected... right?

Zedaph's a whole other can of worms. I'm not sure when they meet, but Andrias has gotten so used to Mumbo's ingenuity & order that he expects the next Hermit engineer he meets to be of a similar ilk.

He almost retires to his chambers with a headache after he finds out Zed's built a perpetual motion engine from salvaged parts... & is using it to power the world's (deliberately) slowest elevator.

He actually retires when Zed's genuinely confused by the idea of using it for anything else.

The only thing calming the king's growing frustration with Zedaph is what he can achieve if he combines the engine & Zed's other breakthrough with Mumbo's advances.

So yes, Zed gets funding & test subjects a team.

At some point after comes his first meeting with Impulse & he thinks "Finally! One of them who's sane!" (False is, almost, but she's hard to control unless nudged via Anne).

He sneakily puts Impulse in a position of keeping an eye on Zed & maybe Tango as well by this time.

An all new brand of chaos breaks loose.

Andrias isnt sure what happened, but there's a hole burnt in his throne room ceiling & the ZIT trio are stood around acting innocent. Impulse is covered head to toe in soot.

It's taking all Andrias' mental effort to keep his composure.

Andrias lucks out with Grian. Though his interactions with Mumbo make it clear the waffle haired builder's a force of prankster chaos of godlike proportions that cannot be halted, he spends a lot of time focused on going on adventures with Anne or making secret plans for a revolution (it's an instinct for Grian, & he doesn't know the context nor which side he's on til True Colors).

That doesn't mean there aren't a few surprises Andrias has to curb, though. The city-wide game of Tag that pulls in every Hermit in Newtopia at the time, plus Anne, Marcy, the Plantars, Yunan & more than a few others is one incident that comes to mind.

Andrias is relieved when Grian's plans for whatever 'another Demise' or 'a new take on Life' might be are put on hold by him remembering the Hermits don't currently have lives to spare.

Thankfully for him, Andrias doesn't meet all 26 Hermits before True Colors. Given how chaotic the ones he has met are, though, that isn't saying much.

And then there's X.

Xisuma is a concern for Andrias as soon as they meet, but he's unable to tap into most of his admin powers nor ping the damaged Hermithius in far orbit. After meeting the suited man - he may be one of the Hermits with Anne when she arrives in Newtopia, but I haven't settled on that - keeping him depowered becomes a priority once its clear he's only the de facto leader of the Hermits by unanimous understanding & won't step in unless things get out of hand, but could absolutely shut down the Core's plans with admin access.

All X's attempts to track down Amphibia's 'admin' & work out a deal seem to fail, & it isn't til True Colors that he realises Andrias has been feeding him bad info.

By then its a bit late to do anything, though.

In the meantime, Andrias seems interested in X's anecdotes about Evil X. What could that be about...?

And yes. Joe Hills. Andrias' worst nightmare: The bard.

Because nothing's scarier than a man who can tear you a new one without lifting a finger.

(I have more ideas about Joe, but this is already too long & I'm tired. :P)

[give-grian-rights]

Bets Against The Void Ch4

I DID AS I SAID I WOULD.

@petrichormeraki

Chapter 1

The Chapter Before

The Next Chapter

Crossposted on AO3

Full fic bellow! content warning for trauma, relating to  the Festival.

By the time they had managed to leave Looky Looky at My Cookie, being around the two teens felt like a hurricane. When Stress managed to convince the two to get something to eat- not that cookies and cake were exactly a healthy breakfast- that certainly hadn’t slowed them down from bouncing off the walls.

Though wary at first, Tommy couldn’t get himself to turn down free goods, without even being accused of stealing. While Grian had been digging through an enderchest, finding payment for the goods, Tommy and pulled Tubbo along to gawk at the builds.

“I don’t fucking get it! Why don’t you guys just, steal shit? I don’t see anyone here to stop that! Or- what’s stopping someone from griefing?” Tommy turned, eyes narrowed on the short brunette woman.

Stress merely tilted her head, brows knitted together in confusion. “We’re a whitelist server, Love! Of course none of us would steal. We’re on a mooshroom island, so we don’t have any worries about any creepers or the like, either.” She had explained, much to the boy’s frustration.

“Yeah, but if someone wanted to, they could just fuckin’ come here and steal! I mean, why would anyone care? Or how would you even notice, you all seem loaded.” He scoffed in frustration.

Tubbo, at his side, laughed. “That’s the coolest part, Tommy! They don’t worry about that! That’s why, like, they’re so cool! No one disrupts eachother or steals, so people can just..Work, and do crazy shit!” They gawked, clapping their hands as they bounced in place.

“I’ve always meant to go back and explore one of the replica worlds you guys put out. The fact that after you’re all finished, you just- put out the code? So others can make replicas of just- such intimate places? And experience it and walk through it? That’s so cool.” Tubbo finally stopped, having nearly ran out of breath.

That earned a flustered laugh out of Stress, nodding along. “Oh, I agree. I only got to join the Hermits two worlds back, on Hermitcraft Five! Me and Zedaph- oh, is he a something- were the new Hermits up until Grian finally joined us, last world.” 

“New Hermit is definitely a heavy torch to carry,” Grian would chirp in, emerging from the shop. “Gotta commit as much chaos as physically possible. Make a good name for yourself.” The brit finished with a wolfish grin, unruly bangs falling past grey, almost purple eyes that glanced between the teens.

“He’s got a point,” Stress snorted, nodding. “If you’re ever bored during your stay, no Hermit are short on stories. Anywho, Grian, you got the spending diamonds for the two?” She turned towards the man- not even a hair taller than herself.

“Yep, of course. Here you two go, I don’t have all my diamonds on me, but this should help cover just about whatever you need.” Pulling out the diamond icon from his tablet, he dropped a numbered amount to both, being deposited into their system. “W- what!” Tubbo exclaimed, pulling out a diamond from their system. “Surely not. Is my tablet reading this right? A stack of diamonds?” They gawked, clutching onto the jewel.

Tommy merely screeched, pressing his tablet against his chest. “Holy fucking SHIT-”

“Jeez does this feel like a language moment-” another voice chimed.

The boy went rigid. Tommy’s head snapping in the direction, as Tubbo nearly jumped out of their skin in surprise. Stood by an igloo- out of place in the clashing mycelium-grass island- was an equally odd man.

Platinum white hair held back(mostly) by a well-worn black headband, a silver plate on the front reading off NHO. A faded, dull green- littered with patches, pins, and buttons- and most unnerving, a black mask covering most of their face. And- most notably- was the pair of slick, glistening snowy owl wings sprawled behind them.

The white-haired figure paused, shifting their weight awkwardly. “Uh, hi.” The guy gave a small wave, expression unreadable past mismatched black-and-red eyes. The man’s hair barely even allowed for those to be viewable- aiding in his masquerade, made the combination of mask-and-bangs shield most of the visible emotion from the newcomers.

“Hey, Etho!” Grian chirped, pleasantly pleased by the appearance of the shady figure. For some reason that Tommy, yet again, doesn’t quite understand, Tubbo gasps.

“Holy- you’re Etho? Like, Ethos Lab?  Oh, oh Void, I spent so much time watching so many of your old redstone videos! It’s what got me so interested in it!” They grinned. 

Oh Prime, who doesn’t this place have? Tommy scoffed at the thought, eyes narrowing on the figure. What’s with the scary mask people always being the ones getting popular, and shit- 

“Oh, thanks. Always happy to hear, there’s always a use for more redstone users. Uh, looks like you got a bit of a tour going on?” The man- Etho, turned towards Grian and Stress. 

“Yep! We wanted to check in on them, I know you heard from the announcement the run down.” Stress grinned, glancing towards the teens. “These two are Tommy and Tubbo. Glad to see you have some idea about Etho, already. He’s always bound to be around somewhere.” 

Tommy scoffed, eyeing the man, a few inches shy of his own height. “Hi, and shit.” He sniffed, crossing his arms.

Etho shuffled in place, nodding. “Uh, yeah. Language, by the way.” He sheepishly huffed, running a hand through his hair. “Welcome, for however long you guys stay. ..And if I may recommend, make sure you head down to Shade-E E’s. Quick profits all around.” He added, pointing with his thumb behind him, towards the dark mansion.

The blond kid raised a brow, tilting his head.  Prime, what is up with this guy.  “Excuse me?” Tommy scoffed.

Grian groaned, rolling his eyes. “Etho. Please. The amount of glass i’ve picked up coming out of the District portal.” He glared pointedly towards the man.

“Mhmm..I don’t see what there is to be so upset over. I think I'm providing a very generous service, to our server.” He snickered, quirking an eyebrow.

Pointedly sending a scolding glare towards Etho, Stress turned towards the two teens. “C’mon, now. Mind that Mr. Ice Queen, now.” She huffed, fondness seeping into her voice.

“I know when I’m unwanted,” Etho chuckled, holding up gloved hands in mock-defense. See you two ‘round. You too, Tubbo, Tommy.” He’d nod towards each person as he named them, before a rocket was summoned to his hand. And, he was off with a trail of smoke.

At the poof and small bang from the minor explosive was all it took for an incident to form. Tubbo cringed, visibly flinching before they curled in on themself, ducking their head down as their arms clung around their head, their ears covered.

Tommy, on the otherhand, nearly jumped a foot in the air before throwing himself on Tubbo.  The two went tumbling to the ground with a huff. 

The two Hermits shot up, turning towards the teens. “Oh Gord, hey, it’s okay, those were just flight duration rockets! They can’t do a thing. Etho’s gone, now.” Grian dropped down next to them, brows pinched in concern. 

“We promise, it’s alright! We all use rockets like that. It’s alright, see? Everything’s fine. No hermit would do a thing to purposefully scare you, like that.” Stress chirped in, her heart sinking at the thought of two kids being so terrified at a simple firework.

Tommy pulled his head away from the crook of Tubbo’s neck, glaring harshly at the adults. Distrust was obvious in his blue eyes, before he untangled himself, pulling up Tubbo with him. “Why the fuck would he need fireworks? He had fucking wings.”

The Hermits exchanged a gaze for a moment, before Grian held up his hands pacifyingly. “That was just an elytra. They take the form most fitting for the wearer, at the moment. Stress marked him the Ice Queen of the season, since he owns that Ice shop,” He’d point with his thumb behind him, at a snowy igloo with an Ice sign above it. “So, he had snow-themed wings. Last world, my Elytra wings were small and white feathers. Rockets boost them, since Elytras can only glide.” Grian explained patiently.

“..Right. Sorry- I- Uh. I didn’t realize he had an Elytra.. S-Should’ve expected the rocket, if I knew.” Tubbo sheepishly laughed it off, their head dipped down.

The correlation between the splattered, sparked burn scars scattered across their face, and their reaction, wasn’t lost on the Hermits. 

There was a brief silence between the four, the blond boy’s arm wrapped tightly around the other teen’s.

“So- what are your wings, now?” Tubbo eventually asked, breaking the tense pause.

Grian made a noise of understanding. “Ah, yeah, I have parrots wings, now! Scarlet Macaw. Red’s the primary color. They’re a good bit bigger than last season’s elytra, since that one was chicken based.”

“Chicken based?” Tommy scoffed, cocking an eyebrow as he eyed the short, young-looking man.

“Yes, that was his whole thing. The Hermits still tease him for it. Mine are floral-based and skeletal, when I wear them.” Stress chirped, her tone warm. With a swipe of her holographic tablet, wings were equipped to her back. 

Indeed, they were as described. A frame of skeletal bones, a light, magenta glistening aura surrounding them. Moss, and large flowers clung to the wings. How exactly she flew with them was beyond anything Tommy knew- or was willing to take the time to understand.

“We won’t be using them, since- you two don’t have any. But it is about time we discuss what your plans are. Has your server’s admin sent any updates?” Grian switched subjects, glancing between the teens.

A tense energy still surrounded them, as Tubbo fidgetted and gripped onto the fabric at the bottom of their shirt.

“No,” Tommy scoffed, pulling his Communicator into his free hand. “The bastard hasn’t said a word.” The boy practically growled out the words, in frustration. 

“Alright,” Grian said easily. “Then we figure out what you two want to do.”

“There’s a lot of spare builds. Keralis, real close to here, has a whole big city. There’s a hotel there. It’s not empty, but it is.. Overwhelming, and a bit much. There are also Hermits starter bases.” Stress explained, trying to lay out the options for the two.

Tommy scowled, while Tubbo looked- well, spaced. Easily the quietest either Hermit had seen them, so far. This only added to their concern.

“I have my starter base. No Hermit would bother you, but it’s close enough that we can drop off supplies, and you’d be able to reach others if you need help. Both of you could have anything I left in those chests, Gord knows I have more than enough resources.” Grian offered, glancing between the teens.

“The spawn room was fine, Mr. Grian.” Tubbo cringed, tilting their head towards the builder.

Grian persisted, gently shaking his head. “No, it isn’t. There isn’t the supplies to really just- let you guys sustain, there.” He grimaced, before manifesting the spruce boat icon into his hand. “Hobbit hole with everything in it going to you two, or empty hotel room with no elevator.” He’d offer.

The pair were quiet for a moment, before Tommy groaned. “Fine. Hermithole, or whatever.” 

Nodding along, Grian trailed off towards shore. “Alright, we have a short journey ahead of us, then. And then you two can decide if you want to settle there and make do with what’s stored, or come back on your own accord for more. I won’t make either of you stick around for much longer.”

“Good.” Tommy grumbled, pulling back out his own boat.

Both groups were soon in their boats, and once more, were off into the ocean.

[votederpycausemufins]

You have no idea how much i enjoy your shared space au

Well I'm glad you do! Here’s some writing for it based on a certain stream of Ranboo’s. But he’s not the only one learning the lessons this time.

When Mumbo wakes up, he realizes that he’s holding an axe and looking down at a baby ziglin. No, not just any ziglin. It’s Michael. The past few days have been rough for him being stuck in someone else’s body at all. He tried once or twice to do redstone, but ended up covered with dust, and trying to wash it off almost burned because of Ranboo being at least part enderman. Usually, that was when Ranboo seemed to disappear, which Mumbo usually worried about. Especially right now.

Putting the axe away, Mumbo pulled out a golden apple and Michael’s attention was immediately grabbed by it. “Hello Michael. How are you this morning?”

Michael snorted in reply and Mumbo handed over the apple, the ziglin just happily holding it to stare at the glittering fruit. He then showed it off to his pet chicken and the two went around the room, making Mumbo smile before he tried to nudge Ranboo awake, if he was even there. ‘Hmm? What is it? I’m up.’

‘Ranboo.’ Mumbo carefully said. Thought? Whatever. ‘That meeting with Foolish about the mansion is today, is it not?’

Mumbo could feel a jolt of panic as Ranboo was suddenly much more awake and in control of their shared body. “Right! We- I need to talk with Foolish. Go over things before I get the payment all figured out. So I’m going to go over there. Uh, I’m going to see you later.” And Ranboo walked towards the trap door exit, bumping into the pet chicken for a moment before moving them closer to Michael and then opening the door. He fumbled as another chicken came up the ladder just as he attempted to go down, though he managed to close the door again. “Huh. Well I guess Michael has a new chicken now.”

‘Ranboo. The mansion and Foolish.’ Mumbo reminded, making Ranboo look towards the front door.

“Right! Here we go!” The enderman hybrid nodded before going outside, his eyes almost immediately seeing the giant build. Mumbo saw it too, and the large build made him homesick for a moment. It didn’t quite look like what the hermits tended to build. To him it just felt a bit lacking. He supposed that was because it wasn’t really lived in yet, but after always seeing Grian’s mansion, this one just didn’t seem as grand. On the other hand, Ranboo had no memory of anything this large and didn’t really know about the things the hermits did, so he was simply in awe at the giant build.

Finding Foolish was a slight chore due to the interior of the mansion being a bit of a maze in Mumbo’s opinion. Ranboo’s too on a second thought, now wondering if maybe it was a bit too big. But before long they found the god and even had a bit of cake to start their meeting. After that they were walking through the empty rooms, Foolish giving suggestions on each one they entered.

Mumbo was half aware of the suggestions of a war room, map room, reading room. But his mind was just thinking of redstone contraptions to fill the place with. A large room could be good for a sorting system. A super smelter would be nice to have. A melon and pumpkin farm in one room with a trading hall nearby.

Mumbo was pulled out of his thoughts briefly by the mention of a chandelier and immediately he rolled his eyes remembering Grian’s diamond one in his own mansion. It didn’t seem like that would be the best to have around here, but they could try something similarly fancy. And then they were talking about a secret room.

There was plenty of fumbling to actually find the secret room, Mumbo trying his best to help just getting them more lost, but eventually they arrived at the walled off room. Mumbo let his mind wander, trying to think up a redstone door to fit the wall and space. He was half aware of Ranboo fumbling over some words and memories, trying to talk to Foolish, but he wasn’t sure it was his place to get involved. At least until he was dragged in.

‘Mumbo. What’s the green card deal?’

“The what?”

‘Wait, green cardboard box one.’

Confused, Mumbo stopped thinking about redstone and listened to the god in front of them who was now whispering. “Cuz you know, We’re only supposed to talk about it at a certain location.”

Mumbo got another question from Ranboo, but he didn’t have an answer. “I don’t know what he’s talking about. I’m sorry.”

Ranboo started to make excuses and try to play along, pretending he knew what was going on as both he and Mumbo tried to wrack their brains on what was being talked about. They followed Foolish down to the entrance, listening to him talk, but then Mumbo felt Ranboo start fading. He went to mentally shake the hybrid awake, scold him for getting bored so quickly, but then he gasped in shock as he suddenly felt like he had a splitting headache.

He wasn’t really paying attention as Ranboo took them elsewhere, he and Foolish soon in Michael’s room. They talked for a bit before Ranboo asked for Mumbo to make up some sort of excuse. The redstoner fumbled with one, but the god seemed to accept it without too much hesitation, and then they were out of the room.

“Ranboo, what was that?”

The hybrid didn’t immediately answer, just walking until they were out of hearing range. Then he stopped in the middle of the hall. “I remembered something.”

Mumbo was worried for a second that Ranboo was heard, but was glad to see that wasn’t the case. “What do you mean? Is it about whatever Foolish was talking about?”

“No. It was.” Ranboo gave a frustrated sigh. “That thing. What was it supposed to be?”

“Ranboo, what’s going on?”

“What was that supposed to be? C’mon. Think, think, think, think, think. Lesson fourteen. Oppor- What deal did I make with Foolish?”

“I don’t know. Ranboo, are you okay?”

“Yeah, I’m just- It’s- I’m just a little light headed right now. That’s all it is. Nothing to do with all those experiments I’ve been doing.”

“The what?! Ranboo?! What do you mean experiments?!”

“Well, I haven’t been doing them that much with you around. But it doesn’t matter. There would be no side effects to them. Absolutely none.”

Ranboo continued to walk, reaching a yellow building decorated with alliums. He tried changing the subject, talking about how he needed to finish the build, and then the headache was back. Mumbo felt like he was scrambling to find something to hold onto and brace himself against whatever was going on. It wasn’t until Ranboo spoke up again that he realized things were clearing, but he was still too much of a mess to comprehend what was being said.

“Ranboo. I think you should go home. You obviously need it. I’m sure Foolish won’t be too upset if he sees you going home to get some rest.”

“No. No. It’s fine. It’s nothing. It’s um, it’s nothing! Can’t be anything because, uh, it has- No, no. It’s fine. It’s fine.” Mumbo went to say something else, but then Ranboo stopped in place and spoke again. “Lesson twenty-seven? How many lessons are there?”

“Ranboo?”

“No. He’s still in prison.”

“You mean Dream?”

But Ranboo just kept talking to himself, ignoring Mumbo. Eventually another bout of pain came, Mumbo struggling against it. When he came too again, Ranboo was saying he was fine, making Mumbo pipe up. “Ranboo. You’re not fine. For all we know this is some side effect of me being stuck in your mind.”

Ranboo stopped walking. “I think I need to tell people.”

“Yes, that sounds like a good-”

“I think I need to tell people what I’ve done.”

That caught Mumbo off guard. “What you’ve done? Ranboo what am I missing here? What did you do?”

“They wouldn’t hold it against me, right?”

“Ranboo, I need more context. For a simple answer, I believe it depends on who you tell, but I still don’t know what thing you’ve done.”

Ranboo just kept walking aimlessly. “No, I should tell people what I’ve done. Sure, they might be mad for a little bit, but at least then they’ll know. I can trust them I think.”

“Again, that depends on-” Mumbo started to reply before he was once again struck with pain. It didn’t last too long, and there was silence as he recovered. Ranboo hadn’t moved far, so hopefully he hadn’t missed much again.

“Unless… Unless I can’t.” Ranboo said, before giving a shuddering sigh. “What… What do these mean? And why are there fifty-three of them?”

“Ranboo. I need you to calm down. Explain what’s going on.”

“Does it mean that I’m not- That I know more than I already thought?” He paused for a moment before shaking his head, trying to sound positive. “No, no, no! I just have to- No, I just have to block it out. No I just have to, I just have to block- block them out. I just have to- No, I just have to block them out, because... it’s what I’ve been doing this entire time. I mean, the experiments have been doing well. I mean, I figured out- I figured out how to cause it! So why…?” He sighed again. “I… I thought that… I knew that there might be side effects, but I… didn’t think that… I didn’t think that this is what it would be.”

“Ranboo. We should go back to your home.”

“No, it’s fine.”

“It’s obviously not fine!”

“No, it’s fine. I’m doing-” He took a deep breath to calm himself. “Okay. It’s fine! It’s fine.”

Then Ranboo’s eyes locked on the prison in the distance. That worried Mumbo even more, so he spoke up a little. “Ranboo, you’re not planning to…?”

The hybrid shook his head. “No. No, no. I promised myself I wouldn’t let that happen. I promised myself I wouldn’t go in there.”

“Good, because I don’t think visiting him would be the best plan. Just because he’s the admin doesn’t mean he would know what’s going on or even try to help.”

“Okay. Okay. It’s fine. It’s fine. It’s fine. ‘Kay.” And then Ranboo stopped walking and slowly turned to face in the direction of the prison again.

“Ranboo. No. We are not going to the prison.”

Ranboo nodded. “Okay. Okay. Yeah.” he agreed. “No I don’t- I should just- I need to go home. I just need to go home.”

“Yes, that is a great idea. Go home, spend some time with Michael, call Tubbo if you need more support, alright?” Mumbo suggested, glad that Ranboo finally seemed to be calming down.

“If- If I- I should just get home. I should just get home.”

“Yes, exactly. Just head home.”

“Just g-” And Ranboo’s panicked spiked and Mumbo was in pain once more. This time he tried to fight against whatever it was, and while he wasn’t able to make much headway, he was able to catch one thing.

“Lesson sixty-seven? Ranboo what is that?”

“Leave no evidence of what you have helped with.” Ranboo answered in a somewhat dark tone. “Evidence of…. Evidence of what?”

“Ranboo we need you to go home now.” Mumbo said seriously. Something was definitely absolutely completely wrong now. “Stop thinking about it and just go home. If not, I’ll have to take control myself and force us there, do you understand?”

“What did I do?”

“Ranboo.” Mumbo said harshly, hoping to get the hybrid’s attention, but to no avail.

“No, no. It’s just- Oh! I’m hungry! That’s why! That’s all it is!” Ranboo said before eating a few baked potatoes.

“Ranboo. This is not just because you’re hungry.”

“It’s just because I haven’t eaten! It’s just because I was a little hungry.”

“I know that you don’t believe that.” Mumbo said. “You’re just trying to convince yourself that’s what’s going on but it’s not true. Ranboo, something is wrong and you need to go home. You need to go home right now, do you understand?”

“Or it could have something to do with the experiments you idiot!” Ranboo yelled, more at himself than Mumbo. He was quiet after that, Mumbo not speaking up to give him a moment. Then he spoke again in a sad tone. “I knew. I knew that if I experimented on it- If I tried to control it, then there might be side effects, but I don’t want these.”

“Ranboo…”

“It’s fine! It’s fine! I don’t even know what these are!” He cut Mumbo off with a chipper tone. “I don’t even know what these are, okay? It’s fine. I can just go home and- I can just go home and it’ll all be fine.” Even though he was trying to convince himself that, Mumbo could hear the hybrid’s worry. “God, it was going so well too. I was fine. I just wanted to figure out how to stop it from happening. And then I screwed it all up again.”

Mumbo tried to comfort Ranboo, noticing that the hybrid was on the verge of tears. He spoke in a calm voice, trying once more to convince Ranboo to just go home. But again, the hybrid tried to pretend everything was fine and go about his day. Any time Mumbo tried to say something, he was talked over by Ranboo trying to pretend everything was fine.

Then, Mumbo noticed as Ranboo seemed to stumble over his words and stop in place, the same he did when the pain was about to happen. He braced himself just in time for whatever was happening, resisting the waves of what was causing him pain, able to fully catch what was going on. A message seemed to be sent to him and Ranboo mentally. ‘Lesson 94: DO NOT LET THEM KNOW WHAT YOU HAVE DONE.’

“Ranboo… Ranboo what was-”

“I have to go to the prison.”

“What do you mean?”

“It’s… It’s my fault Tommy got stuck in there. I’m the reason he ended up dead. I mean, I don’t remember what happened, but it had to be me. I found the TNT, and there were explosions and-”

“Ranboo calm down! You’re just panicking yourself more.”

“It was the fourth book. It was the fourth book.”

“What was the fourth book? Ranboo I still have barely any context.”

“Please Mumbo, I need to go to the prison. It was the fourth book! God! I have to go to the prison! I have to- I have to go to the prison!”

“You need to go home!”

“No! I have to go to the prison! Now! I- I have to talk to Sam. Please I have to talk with him.”

Mumbo was reluctant, but agreed. “Alright. Fine. We can talk with him, and then you need to go home.”

Mumbo did his best to keep Ranboo as calm as possible as they went towards the prison. It didn’t do too much, but he managed to keep the hybrid from completely breaking down. When they were just about at the prison, Ranboo saw Sam and Mumbo could feel the hybrid relax just from seeing the man. Ranboo called out Sam’s name until he turned around, wondering what the hybrid needed.

“Oh, hey Ranboo.” Sam said, his calm voice very different from Ranboo’s breathless words.

“How- How are you doing?”

Sam paused, obviously picking up on Ranboo’s panic. “I’m… good. How are you?”

“Doin’ good.” Ranboo replied, and Mumbo was half tempted to forcefully take control right then and there so the hybrid wouldn’t dance around the truth.

“Well, I’m just cleaning up a bunch of holes around the prison. Trying to clean it up.”

“Oh yeah, that’s great. Uh, um… I need to go in the prison Sam.”

“You what?” Sam asked, shocked, while Mumbo said the same thing in a more exasperated tone. “No, Ranboo this is not what we agreed to. You were just going to talk with Sam and then we were going home.”

“I need to go in the prison Sam.” Ranboo repeated, more confident this time. “I need to go in.”

“You need to go in the prison?” Sam asked, sounding a bit skeptical. “N- Wait, what do you need to go in the prison f- You don’t need to go in the prison Ranboo. You can’t. We’re not- No one’s allowed to visit the prison Ranboo.”

Mumbo sighed, glad that Sam wasn’t going to let Ranboo in, but then the hybrid spoke up again. “I know that, but I need to go- I need to go in, Sam! You don’t understand, I need to go in! Please!”

“Ranboo… Are you okay?” Sam asked, sounding worried, and Mumbo mentally facepalmed as Ranboo said he was fine when it was still very clear he wasn’t.

“Yeah no, I’m fine. I uh, I just fell in some water on the way here. That’s all. I’m fine. I need you to let me in the prison though.”

“Are you sure you’re alright though?”

“Yeah, I’m completely okay. I just need you to let me into the prison. Please.”

“I’m not letting you in the prison.” Sam replied, trying to sound serious, but concern still coming through. “You told me yourself, you didn’t want to go into the prison.”

“I know.” Ranboo started, sounding frustrated. “But I’m also telling you now, to let me in!”

There was silence for a few moments and Mumbo was worried that Sam was about to say yes. But thankfully, he didn’t. “I’m not going to let you into the prison Ranboo. You know what happened the last time someone was let in the prison. No one can go in the prison.”

“Please Sam. Why not? Why not? Why not?!”

“You told me yourself to keep you away from the prison.”

“I know, but I-”

“-You thought it was dangerous. You said Dream was dangerous, that we need to keep everyone away. That’s what you said. You told me that.”

“Yeah, but I’m telling you now Sam.” Ranboo started, and finally Mumbo understood what was going on. Not wanting to keep dancing around, he pushed Ranboo out of control and spoke himself, trying to hide his accent and sound as flustered as Ranboo was. “I want to be put in the prison. As a prisoner. I don’t want to be a visitor, I want to be locked up.”

Sam was quiet, stunned by the statement. Mumbo carefully gave Ranboo control again, the hybrid mentally thanking him as they waited for Sam to respond. “W- What?”

“I need to be put in the prison.”

“No. No Ranboo. You don’t need to be put in the prison.” Sam’s serious tone switched out for a worried and concerned one. “What are you talking about?”

“No, I do.” Ranboo said, shaking his head as he disagreed with the warden. “I need to because-” And suddenly the words refused to come out. Ranboo was just as surprised as Mumbo was, trying again. “I need to because-” but his mouth shut itself. “Because you don’t know what Drmm…”

“Ranboo?”

“I…. I can’t tell you why.” Ranboo said instead. “I just need you to trust me. Please Sam, put me in the prison.”

“Ranboo, I’m not going to try and lock you in the prison. You don’t need to be in the prison. It’s dangerous. You said yourself that no one should be going in there.”

“No! I mean-! As a visitor! But I want to go in as an inmate!”

“Ranboo, I’m not going to lock an innocent person into the prison.”

“But I’m not-!” Ranboo said, once again on the verge of tears.”

“You haven’t done anything wrong Ranboo.” Sam said, the slightest bit of a different accent creeping its way into the words. “What’s going on with you? Do you need to talk?”

“It’s- I can’t tell you! I can’t tell anyone! I only managed to tell Mmm… To tell Mmph… I just can’t tell anyone!”

“O-okay.” Sam tried saying in a calm tone. “Okay I get that. Are you alright? Just tell me, are you alright?”

“I don’t know anymore Sam.” Ranboo said, and then Mumbo fet the slight burning that came from Ranboo’s tears. “But… please Sam, please! Please, I’m begging- Please just put me in the prison!”

Sam continued to refuse as Ranboo begged to be put in, trying to hand over his gear to the warden. He begged and shouted and yelled and pleaded, asking to be put in there, maybe just for a few years to keep people safe. But Sam still refused, saying if someone asked to be put in, they likely didn’t actually need to be put in prison.

“Ranboo. There’s nothing you could do that would make us- would make me put you in the prison. I will not let anyone else into this prison with Dream. Because of what he does.”

“Please, you need to put me in there. There is a reason.”

“No there’s not.”

“No there is! There’s so many of them! There’s… there’s ninety-three of them Sam! There could even be hundreds of reasons. Thousands...”

Sam put his hands on Ranboo’s shoulders, one hand gripping a bit tighter than the other in such a familiar way to Mumbo. “I look at you, and I can’t see any reasons why you would need to be locked up in a place like that, alright? No one like you needs to be in this prison. You are not being put in there.”

The two of them stared at each other, Ranboo not caring about the discomfort of eye contact. After a few seconds, the hybrid gave the smallest of replies with a very quiet ‘please’. And then before Sam could say no, Ranboo got another idea and was talking again. “What if-! What if I paid you? What if I paid you to put me in the prison, huh? Would you- Would you do it then?”

“No. There is nothing whatsoever that would get me to put you in a prison like that. That’s meant for dangerous people and you are not a dangerous person. Not like Dream is. You haven’t done anything wrong. Most likely you’re imagining it. I think you should go home and get some rest, especially since it looks like we spent most of the night talking.”

Ranboo looked up to see light starting to appear from the sunrise. Mumbo also tried once more to convince Ranboo to go home, and that seemed to finally get through to the hybrid. He started nodding a little, Sam sighing in relief, but then Ranboo changed his mind. “What if I put myself in Sam?”

“You can’t get in there Ranboo. It’s closed right now.”

“Really? What if you forgot? Huh? What if you left it open?”

“No. Ranboo, I am not locking you in there. You’re a good person.”

“If I’m a good person, then you can trust me and you can trust my judgement.”

Sam cursed a bit, sounding a bit inhuman with a hiss. “No. No. Ranboo, you're a good person, but right now I don’t think you’re in the right mindset. You should get some rest and I’m sure you’ll realize you don’t need to be locked up.”

“But I’m blwnnn… I- I’ve blown… Man, I… I can’t say it.” Ranboo sighed, looking down at the ground. While Mumbo didn’t want them to get locked up, it was clear to him that this was eating Ranboo up. “I think I’m the one who bl-” and then it felt like there was someone clamping down on this throat. It felt cold, like falling into the void, but also felt like a shackle holding him down. He wanted to claw at his throat, but Ranboo was in control again and Mumbo had no body of his own.

He barely paid attention to the conversation until Ranboo started to walk away. “Fine. Fine. I’ll go. I’ll go home. Okay… you have no idea what you’ve done. I… I’m not a good person. I really don’t think so.”

Ranboo walked until he was out of Sam’s hearing range and then he stopped again. He looked down as his fists, which were balled up in anger and shaking a bit. “I know what I need to do.”

“And what’s that Ranboo?” Mumbo asked, hoping it was to finally go rest at home.

“If I’m not going to be put in there, I at least need answers. And the only way to do that is to keep experimenting.”

“What?! Ranboo, no! For all we know your experiments are the cause of all this! You can’t just torture yourself and hope it works out.”

“Well what am I supposed to do? I can’t trust myself to not hurt anyone again!”

“But you can trust me.” Mumbo said quietly.

“What?”

“You can trust me.” Mumbo said louder. “If… if Sam won’t let you into his prison, then we’ll build you one for yourself. We can gather up the redstone supplies we need and I can build you your own personal cell. We’ll tell Tubbo enough so that he can make sure you don’t get out and keep you fed, alright? Does that sound good?”

Ranboo paused, thinking it over before nodding. “Okay. Yeah. We can do that. You… you’re really going to build it?”

“Yes.” Mumbo replied. Was he lying? Only slightly. They would build a cell but he would make it complicated so that hopefully it never got finished and would just exhaust Ranboo so he couldn’t do anything dangerous to himself or others. He could do this. It was just like boring someone to sleep with redstone explanations, just a bit more complicated. “So, let’s get ready to go mining.”

[justletmeplayminecraft]

Okay so this may be a lil dumb but imagine the angst potential that Mumbo leaving the MR wasnt about ‘vaults’ he’s just fed up of Grian using him as a scapegoat that lands him in trouble or kinda humiliates him cause my brain goin brrr with that idea

oh this is absolutely not dumb i love it! especially given how they basically just recruited mumbo as a scapegoat, didn't even give him something to do compared to the latest HEP developments which were in xb's video... i love mumbo taking a more active role in his treatment, finally putting his foot down.

also, wrote a short 1kish ficlet under the cut based on mumbo & cub's meet up. it's basically a sad mumbo and cub comforting him but i thought it was sweet. read it if you wish!

It sounds like a weird thing to say. No, in fact, he knows it's a weird thing to say. Yet, looking around the HEP factory, Mumbo finds himself a little reluctant to leave. He must've spent around an hour with Cub already just talking about the vaults he's built. They're impressive things! From the front door, to a vault inside a vault! Mumbo had so many questions, and Cub answered them with matching enthusiasm. And now it's around the time he knows they should be parting ways but-

"Mumbo?" Cub calls him back to attention, voice soft. It echoes around the empty space of the factory, its brick shell waiting to be filled. Scar really is such a good builder. "Dude, you alright?" Mumbo sighs, turning to Cub when he steps beside him.

"I-" He closes his mouth to rethink what he wants to say. His hands tuck into the pockets of his trousers. He'll fiddle with the cuffs of his sleeves otherwise. Learnt habits. Finally, he gathers the courage to ask, "Do you mind if a vent a little?" Cub tilts his head, dark eyes squinting in concern. Mumbo... Wasn't expecting that. Even when Cub speaks, Mumbo's waiting for an excuse why he doesn't have time.

Instead Cub tells him, "Come and sit down, then." He leads Mumbo to the bed he placed earlier. Mumbo doesn't understand why he feels so surprised. When did he get so used to people pushing him away? He takes a seat on the blue quilt, sinking into the comfortable fabric. Cub places down his ender chest, sitting down there, leaning towards him. "What's up, Mumbo? I know it's been a while since we last talked."  

"I just-" His hands dig into his lap now they don't fit in his pockets. He refuses to fiddle. "I feel like nobody really appreciates me, you know?" Cub's brows lower enough that Mumbo can see them beneath his helmet.

"On the server? 'Cause, you gotta know we love you here. The stuff you build is incredible, man. I wish I could build farms like you." Mumbo smiles, but his heart isn't in it.

"Sometimes it feels like that's all people want me for." He sighs, sinking onto his legs. His suit crumples around him, pulling tight around his chest. As silly as it sounds, it feels like a layer of protection. Him and his suit in this massive factory. Accompanied by Cub's concerned gaze.

"Explain it to me," Cub encourages. There's no judgment in his voice. None of his body language suggests an ulterior motive. Cub wants to listen to his worries. Goodness, why is that so surprising? Why is he so used to people stepping over him?

"I feel like I'm always just- ugh, I don't know how to say this." He tries to connect his thoughts back together. There's no pressure on him, but he still feels an urge to rush as if Cub's patience might run out any second. He tries again, "I always seem to be the butt of jokes nowadays. I mean, the whole mayor thing, for one. And now! I may act oblivious, but I'm not. Not really. They were setting me up to take their fall and I just- is that fair? Is that fair to me?"

"Mumbo," Cub says his name in a tone similar to Xisuma's when he's telling Mumbo to get some rest. "You understand you can say no to these things, right?" Mumbo's breath comes out in a frustrated puff. Fabric bunches between his fingers, trousers misshapen around his legs.

"I do. At least, I think I do." He scrubs a hand over his face, pushing hair back under his helmet. "Maybe I was foolish. But I hoped, maybe this time, I'd actually be involved in things. I could do something. But I don't even think they consider me a member! Just a scapegoat for them!" His hand returns to his lap like it's made of concrete. "Don't get me wrong, I'd do it for the plot. But... I don't think I'd enjoy it."

"Hey, Mumbo." Cub's voice settles him, gentle and reassuring. Mumbo's shoulders sink at the sound. Was he really holding that much tension? "If I've ever done something to pressure you, then I'm really sorry, man. This is supposed to be for fun." Mumbo finds he can't look at Cub anymore, the genuine apology squeezing his heart tight.

"I- You're okay, Cub. You're fine." His lips twitch into a sad smile. "I know these storylines mean a lot for people, I don't blame anyone... I think I'm just tired." Cub's tanned skin comes into his vision, taking Mumbo's pale hand into his own. Mumbo looks up, finding eyes so earnest it takes his breath away.

"You're right that this isn't fair on you." Mumbo doesn't want to admit that he nearly cries at those words, but he very nearly does. How long has he wanted his worries to be validated, now? His feelings acknowledged? "If there's anything I can do to help, please let me know. I can tell the others to tone it down, if you need."

"No, no, they're okay. I don't want to cause problems." Cub looks like he wants to argue, but he doesn't. Mumbo is grateful. There are some problems he's not ready to unpack just yet.

"That's alright. If you ever want to talk to me, let me know, okay? I'll be a willing ear, all plotlines put aside." Mumbo's smile is genuine this time.

"I... I really appreciate that, Cub. Thank you."

Cub squeezes his hand, "It's no problem, man. It's what friends do." Yeah. Friends. Mumbo swallows.

"I should probably be going. I was hoping to plan out some farms tonight." Despite Cub's concern, he helps Mumbo onto his feet.

"You sure?" Mumbo sends that smile in Cub's direction as he flattens out his suit.

"Yeah. I really am grateful for all this, Cub. It means a lot." Cub's smile is just as nice to see.

"I'm glad. Anything I can do to help. I'm just a message away, got it?" Mumbo nods, tapping the communicator in his cufflink.

"Got it. I'll see you around, dude. Thank you, again."

"Not a problem. Was nice talking to you."

Cub doesn't even make a comment about joining HEP as they part ways. They're just two friends. No war, no plotlines. Mumbo breathes in the grass outside the factory, closing his eyes against the bright sun. It's a beautiful day. He likes the crunch of grass under his shoes, how he can't smell the ever-present fungus from the shopping district.

Yeah. He's got some things to think about.

[hermits-that-craft]

Forgetting and Leaving - Part Two

Welcome to part two of Forgetting and Leaving. 

Once again I am recommending people go to @target-block for more information about Ray’s Stuck Au.

Daisy looks up at Rose, yawning as they make their way to the end. The world has been glitching recently, and Orchid nearly died when Daisy transformed, the transformation causing some lag that made everything nearly stop. Orchid clearly didn't want to leave this world, and Daisy doesn't blame him, the world certainly has something that the two men recognise, though its as though they are seeing it through a pane of fogged glass - nothing is clear.

Rose doesn't recognise anything, although they do bring it up with him. He recognises how the world works, knowing things that they shouldn't know about the update, but the buildings don't make sense to him like they do to Daisy and Orchid. Orchid swears on his life that he knows the mansion that they hid in, but he can't remember any of the rooms. A robotic voice calls Orchid Impulse, and calls Daisy Ren. Neither of them don't recognise the names.

They walk over to the end portal, Daisy leading the group as a second nature. Rose shakes nervously as they stand on the edge of the portal, and Orchid pats his back. Daisy pushes them in before jumping in himself, something sad tugging at his soul, longing for a few more minutes. He doesn't understand it.

They land on an obsidian platform, and Rose leads them towards the centre of the main island. He turns around, tugging on the white sleeve of his jacket and smiling nervously. There's no wind in the End but Rose's blonde hair still sways in the breeze.

"Ready to go?"

---

Iskall lands, his inventory filled with shulker boxes of wood. He is ready to get started on his mega base - a giant tree with a large canopy, larger than life and bigger than all of the jungle trees around him. It's safer to think about building then about his friends. Not just the missing ones - Iskall doesn't trust himself to think about Mumbo or Stress without breaking down. He's gone a week without a breakdown, the longest since -

No, don't think. Build.

Iskall places blocks, planned and timed and he's so tired, he wants a break but to let his mind wander is to break his streak. He doesn't think, he just builds. He doesn't even notice it when his axe breaks, nor does he notice Stress as she visits with some logs she had spare. No, Iskall just works. He doesn't think. He just builds. He hardly notices his elytra creeping dangerously towards breaking. He doesn't think. He doesn't notice it as he uses up shulker box and shulker box of wood. He just builds.

He notices his elytra breaking.

Iskall falls towards the jungle canopy, a scream ripping from his throat. His eyes wide open. The world doesn't slow like people claim it would. He doesn't watch, outside of his body, as he crashes onto the grass.

Iskall wakes up in his bed, his heart races as he finally lets himself cry.

---

Evil Xisuma has been alone, stuck in season 5, for too long. It's painful, thinking of the hermits, but he lets himself stay in Xisuma's base. It's alright, he thinks to himself, it's alright that the hermits left him behind. He's safe here, at least. It's better than the void, cold and empty and falling with no end. He's safe here.

But Impulse, Grian and Ren aren't.

They shouldn't be here, but as Evil Xisuma watches them walk through the shopping district he realises that Ren and Impulse are just as lost and confused as Grian is. They shouldn't be - they built the shops they stop outside of. The ones that they look longer at, spend more time asking about who built it. It confuses Evil Xisuma. 

He could stay and watch them, but he can’t let them walk around as though they have no idea what they are doing. It’s risky, though. The risks outweigh the benefits, but he can’t stand to watch them anymore. Evil Xisuma glides down behind them, landing on the ground with a precision that only someone who’s mastered the elytra can claim. He doesn’t land silently, however, and the three men spin around, Impulse pushing the other two behind him. Funny, Evil Xisuma thinks, he can’t be better at fighting then Ren.

“Woah, I’m not here to fight.” Evil Xisuma raises his hands in surrender as Impulse raises an iron sword to his throat. “What are you guys doing here?”

“Oh, is this your world?” Grian asks, and Evil Xisuma frowns at him. “I’m sorry if it is, the last world we were in was corrupted and I has to-”

“Hermitcraft is corrupted?” Evil Xisuma gasps, looking at them. “Is Xisuma alright?”

“Who’s Xisuma?” Impulse asks him, and there's no hint of sarcasm in his voice. 

“What’s a hermitcraft?”

“It must have been the world we were last on.”

“Of course it is, Grian. Hermitcraft season six, or is it season seven now? Xisuma hasn’t been telling me anything.” Evil Xisuma grumbles to himself.

“My name isn’t Grian.” Grian says blankly. “I’m Rose.”

---

Scar flies out of the jungle, careful to avoid the areas that he knows have been built in. He and Doc have agreed to meet away from the hermits, to both protect the hermits from what they want to do and to make sure that they aren’t caught. Again. To make sure that they aren’t caught again.

Scar lands in the mining mesa, watching the nether portal as a figure begins to appear in it’s frame. Doc walks out of the portal, some quartz in his hands. Scar can hardly contain his excitement to see the man, and he pulls Doc into a hug. The two men don’t hear the nether portal update, someone coming through the portal. No, they don’t notice anyone else in the area until it’s too late.

“Well, I don’t mean to break this up,” Xisuma says. “But, next time, I’d suggest having your secret liaisons in places where the rest of us don’t go.”

Doc and Scar jump away from each other, trying to make it seem as though they hadn’t planned on meeting here, but Xisuma just sighs, disappointment as sadness in his eyes.

“I had to contact Stress and Bdubs. You two know you aren’t allowed to meet up without supervision- Is that quartz Doc?” Xisuma’s voice begins to shake, anger and fear mixing together. Doc tries to hide it behind his back, stammering out excuses, but Xisuma practically flies over to Doc, grabbing his wrists. “Are you insane?”

“It isn’t what it looks like-”

“That’s a weak excuse, Doc, and you know it. Doc, you can’t be serious. A time machine?”

“I had just mined some, Xisuma, I swear!” Doc’s isn’t lying, per say. He did just mine some of the quartz, but not all of it. They had been planning this for weeks. Doc and Scar have to find the hippies - it’s their fault that they went missing in the first place. Area 77’s fault.

“Scar, tell me truthfully - Did Doc just mine that quartz?” Xisuma growls, not removing his hands from Doc’s wrists. Scar stands straighter, his back ridgid.

But they had planned for this as well.

“He did, Xisuma. Please, we only planned to meet here so we could talk without people examining our every word.” The lie falls out of Scar’s mouth, practiced to perfection. He walks towards Xisuma, his hand falling on the man’s shoulder. “Please, X. We’re tired of people trying to psychoanalyze everything we say.”

“You called us X?” Stress’ voice is tired, barely containing a yawn. She and Bdubs walk through the portal before they gasp, looking at the scene in front of them, only lit up by the nether portal and the moon.

“Oh, Doc.” Bdubs’ voice is quiet, sad. “C’mon, lets get you home. We’ll talk about this in the morning.”

“I didn’t do anything wrong.” Doc growls. “Just because-”

“He and Scar were going to rebuild the time machine.” Xisuma says, letting go of Doc’s wrists. Stress gasps again, turning to Scar with hurt in her face, and Scar feels shame well up in his throat. “Scar can’t lie well, it was obviously rehearsed.”

“We’ll keep a closer eye on them.” Stress promises, taking Scar’s hand and dragging him towards the nether portal. “Don’t worry, Xisuma. We won’t let them do anything stupid.”

---

Orchid doesn’t trust the man, who only introduces himself as E-X, though he reluctantly lets the man follow them around. The name Impulse pushes around his head, confusing and frustrating him. It feels familiar, as familiar as all of the builds they pass do, but he can’t place it anywhere. A brother, a doppleganger, a clone, a twin, a coincidence. None of those explain why Ex seems so sad by them.

They arrive on a mycelium island, split down the middle by different shades of concrete. Daisy immediately walks towards a large orange and black concrete building, mumbling something about supplies in the Nether Drive, though neither Rose nor Orchid can work out what he means by that.

They follow him anyways, Orchid keeping a close watch on Ex out of the corner of his eyes. There’s something about him that's familiar, just like this world, that unsettles him. Hopefully he will tell Orchid why he is familiar to him.

“What happened?” Ex asks quietly to him as Daisy and Rose disappear into the building. “Why don’t you remember here?”

“Ex, I have no idea what you mean.” Orchid says, gripping his iron sword tightly.

“I-” Ex cuts himself off. “I’m worried for you, Impulse.”

“Orchid.”

“Orchid,” Ex nods. “Please, what’s your earliest memory. I swear, if it’s something normal I’ll drop this subject.”

Orchid frowns, thinking back onto the moment when the watcher cursed them, though that’s not his earliest memory. His earliest memory is comforting, a warm blanket wrapped around his shoulders, soup in his hands as he sits by a fire, his mother telling ghost stories while his father laughs. When he tells Ex that, the man sighs, taking his helmet off.

“I’m going to head off back to my bro- my base. I’ll be back in the morning. Meet you guys here?”

“I’ll ask Rose and Daisy about it.” Orchid replies, waving goodbye to the strange man. 

He walks into the storage unit before he pauses, frowning at the room. It’s bright in here, not at all like the calming rustic builds that Rose had been making for them. Orchid walks into the middle of the room, where a water elevator waits patiently for him. He enters it, slowly traveling up.

He finds Rose and Daisy on the top floor, beds set up on the floor. Rose looks up as he steps out of the water elevator, a towel in his hand. Orchid gladly takes the towel, yawning as he pats himself dry. Daisy hands him so old looking potatoes, shrugging an apology.

“If they make us sick I’ll take full responsibility.” Daisy smiles at him. “Where’d our friend go?”

“He went to his base. Must be desperate to sleep, when he took his helmet off he looked like Rose when we don’t force him to go to bed.” Orchid smirks, nudging the man.

“Oh come on!” Rose complains. “I’m going to bed, I didn’t come here to be made fun of.”

“Aw, Rose you know I didn’t mean it!” Orchid laughs, and Rose throws a pillow at him. He misses, hitting Daisy in the face. Orchid devolves into giggles, laughing at the shocked look on Daisy’s face.

“Oh it is on my dudes.” Daisy says, picking up the two pillows the are now on his bed. “Give up, I have the higher ground!”

“Never!” Orchid yells, hitting Daisy with his own pillow. Daisy drops a pillow in surprise, and Rose quickly snatches it off the ground.

They fight for a while, ducking and slamming each other with the pillows. Feathers fly and laughter roars through the abandoned islands. Orchid kicks Daisy’s legs and Rose jumps on the man, his pillow perfectly positioned to hit Daisy’s face.

“Rose why, you were supposed to be my brother!”

“Long live the king!” Rose giggles, hitting Daisy in the face. Orchid takes the opportunity to hit Rose across the back of the head and they restart the round, this time Rose and Daisy against Orchid.

[crypticalwitch]

A Halloween night! Bloody Code Au (Part 1)

Ok, this is crossposted (i really hope im using it right) to my wattpad, but there its a songfic to Victorious by Panic! at the Disco, but i removed that here, because i liked it alot. also this is a cliff hanger that i will update to add the link to the second one later. Also some bad language, booze and blood and vomit. not graphic or anything, just wanted to mention! 

Part 1/ Part 2

Grian smiled. Halloween was always one of his favorite holidays, since it was excuse to cause trouble, and a halloween party at a night club was definitely going to be fun. The costume He and Scar chose was also very fun. While most might have just bought something, they had two advantages over everyone else, 1) Demise ment they had the best ghost costumes, with little to no make up, only using it to bright colour to scar tissue, which is why the pair were grayscale while walking down the road, and 2)Vex and Fairy, enough said.

And so Grian and Scar walked down the road toward the club. Grian had brought his vex mask, while Scar had made sure to have small stash of regen potions incase someone over did it on the drinks.

“SCAR GRIAN!” Rens familiar voice called out from down the road. Grian began to run closer, Scar on his heels. 

“HI REN!” Grian yelled. Ren was dressed up a stereotypical wolf man, though he only had the wolf ears,tail and clawed gloves. 

“Ready Scar?” Ren asked, jumping up and down slightly.

“You know it!” Scar smiled, “Cub already inside right?”

“Yup!” Ren cocked his head to the side. “What are you guys dressed up as?”

Grian smirked.

“Were Dead!” Scar giggled

“OH!” ren seemed to notice the grey skin, the X-ed out eyes, and the scars. The outline of grains skeleton was highlighted, and scars lips and hands were a pale yellow-green.

“Well, lets go!” grian said, his impatience beginning to show.

“Yeah!” Ren smiled and began to pull the pair to the entrance.

The club was bright, loud, and chaotic, in a very different way than Hermitcraft, and Scar wasn’t sure how to feel about it. Grian seemed to enjoy the loud music and immediately went off to the dance floor after seeing Iskall, who was dressed up as a mad scientist. 

Scar met up with cub, who was dressed up as a vampire, and got a comfortable seat close enough to the bar and the dancefloor, but wasn’t two crazy.

Things were fine at first. None of the group really drank too hard, and Scar even went out to dance with grian for a while. And then the coughing started.

It was only a small cough at first, occasional and something he could ignore. And then he coughed something up. A very familiar taste, the taste that ended his Demise run. He grabbed a napkin and spit it out, the pale yellow color staining the paper.

Grian was in a similar boat. The scars from the blast always itched slightly, even when he was alive, but at some point in the night, the scars began to inch and ache like crazy. It wasn’t until he rubbed one of the markings and his hand came away bloody that he realise something might be wrong.

Scar ended up in the bathroom, Grian at his side, Coughing and retching up poison and blood while Grian slowly dripped blood from his arms and legs.

“Feeling better?” Grian asked, rubbing his boyfriends back.

“A little.” Scar smiled, pulling back from the toilet “has the bleeding slowed any?”

“Yeah, its done I think.” Grian giggled, “Could you imagine if someone saw us?”

“In the same bathroom stall? Or coughing up blood and poison?”

“Yes.”

“Grian that makes no sense!” Scar laughed, 

“Ready to head back out?” Grian smiled, wiping the blood from his hands off on toilet paper.

“Yeah,” Scar smiled. “I think so!”

Grian and Scar slid out of the stall, right into a very confused Ren standing in the doorway.

“REN!” Grian blushed

“Uuhhh how long have you been standing there?” Scar asked, blushing under the grey.

“Long enough to know you two were in the same stall, but not long enough to know why!” Ren said, followed by an awkward laugh.  

“Really nothings happening.” grian began to spitball. “Its all fine. Nothings happening. Everything's FINE.” Scar facepalmed.

“We’ll explain later.” Scar smiled, “But not right now.”

“I guess thats fair my dudes.” ren smiled.

“Im just gonna,leave.” Grian carefully moved past ren, and entered back onto the dance floor.

Grian almost didn't notice the man dressed up as the grim reaper among the sea of costumes, but the reaper certainly noticed him. When grian got a drink, the man watched from a corner of the dance floor. When grian joined up with iskall on the Dancefloor, the man watched from the corner of grian’s eye.

“YOU!” he shouted, his voice gravely, as if he had been decomposing.

“Me?” Grian felt his face go warm.

The man stepped closer, and drew a scythe from his long tattered cloak. He growled, “You…”

Grian was finally able to get a good look at him. 

“Grimdog?” grains stomach flip flopped over and over again.

“Hehe” He nervously chuckled as the reaper apoached, flipping the sythe expertly around, so that the point was up, and placed it to Grian’s neck. “No hard feelings, remember ol’ buddy?”

The reaper growled.

Grimdog removed the point from Grian throat, before giving it a hefty swing into grian’s torso area. Grian lept back, the bone blade only landing a light scratch across Grian’s chest.

“Ok, got it, hard feelings.” grian joked, before pulling his mask off its chain. “If its a fight you want Grimdog,” Grian smiled, placing the mask on his face. “Then its a fight you’ll get.” Grian shouted voice took on an echoy quality,like many hims speaking at once.

Across the club, Scar, Cub, Iskall and Ren hear this, though only one recognised Grian’s voice.

“Oh no…” Scar murmured into his drink, non alcoholic as usual.

“Has someone already started a fight?” Iskall swirled his glass while he leaned back in his chair.

“Sounds like it.” cub smiled, slightly buzzed, “Wonder whats it over.”

“Somthin dumb probably.” Ren said. “Scar are you ok? You look nervous.”

 “IIIIIII, recognise that voice…” Scar said, nervously drawing out his words. “And if im right….”

“...WE should probably leave the building.”

“What?” Iskall sat up in his seat properly. “Why?”

“Cause if he’s any sort of involved with a fight…” Scar blushed as Grian-vex cackled along with the clang of bone and metal. People began to rush towards the exits “Shits about to hit the fan.”

The table stared for a moment, suddenly serious. 

“Welp.” Cub stood up,  putting on his cheep vampire cape, “Scar swore, The sky is Green, Grass is blue, and i'm getting the hell out of dodge.”

“Ditto.”

“Right behind ya.”

The four only got a few blocks down the road when the sound of bricks exploding echoed through the streets.

“SCATTER!” Scar screamed, Cub and Iskall began running down alleys as Ren and Scar continued running the main streets.

“OH COME ON GRIM!” the voice laughed. “I thought you’d be better at using that thing!”

“really?” scar muttered, “taunt the reaper huh?”

“Is this guy really brave or really stupid?”

Scar rolled his eyes. “Both.”

“Oof”

The fight had made it to the pair, and scar pulled ren into an alleyway. Giving ren the first view of this mysterious man.

The man’s skin was a pale grey-blue color. His dark hair had many curls were supernaturally sharp, a look that didn't sit right with Ren. His eyes and mouth didn't help. Both were glowing white-blue, his eyes eerily pupiless and his mouth filled with sharp teeth, pulled into a frustrated and menacing smile. Behind him, a pair of white wings glowed, and in his hand, a loosely held an axe.

The Reaper, if he even was human, was worse though. His eyes were pitch black, and everything about was salow and decayed, like he had just risen from the grave. He was covered with a swirling cloak, and carried a large scythe that appeared to be the jaw bone of some large animal.

Ren looked up at Scar. Scar watched the battle with an nervous air. The pair were stuck. Ren didn’t know who to hope for. The Reaper with the Scythe or the Spirit with an Axe.

“I-swear-if-i-die-dressed-as-the-world-most-effort-put-into-bad-halloween-costume-i'm-going-to-haunt-someone.” he whispered, semi-serious.

The reaper and Spirt help up their weapons and charged at each other.

[kathasgotyourtongue]

Unpredictable Jokers (A Hermitcraft Fanfiction)

Missed a chapter? Catch them here or on my wattpad book:

Prologue |  Chapter 1

Chapter 2

~~~~~~~~~~

The next person to spot this mysterious character was Bdubs.

He had been working hard on his latest village style house, when he had gotten a chat from his Boomer buddy, Tango. Tango had wanted to discuss a new redstone machine for their business, and who was Bdubs to decline?

Bdubs cleaned up his area and put a few more blocks down, before heading back to his main house to gear up.

He was just about to take off, when he noticed movement in his flower fields. Looking closer, he saw someone duck down out of view. Bdubs raised a brow. Who could that have been?

For a moment, he feared Doc was still mad about the goat statue incident, but shook the thought away when he remembered they had made amends already. Curiousity killed the cat, he joked to himself, and wandered over to see who it was.

He snuck closer, before jumping out at where he saw the person before, in an attempt to catch them in the act. He was rather confused when he saw nobody there. They couldn't have gotten away from that spot unless going under ground, but none of the ground seemed disturbed.

Bdubs scratched his head in confusion, before looking around. He almost missed it, but managed to catch sight of the person bolt into his green house. Aha!

He grinned in victory as he ran over. Whoever this was, they sure were sneaky!

As Bdubs rounded the doorway into the building, he grew frustrated. Nothing. Where could they have gone this time!? He sighs. When he finds who is messing with him, ohh, they would never hear the end of it!

The door behind Bdubs suddenly slammed shut, making him jump and yelp in surprise. His eyes darted to the door, staring it down for a moment. Becoming annoyed and, frankly uncomfortable, he pulled out his communicator and typed out a message.

Bdubs: Ok, who is messing with me!? You will get what's coming to you!

He pressed send and awaited a response. A creak in the floorboards above him made him tense up. This was... starting to freak him out a bit.

The house grew strangley quiet, and he eyed the stairs across the room intently. His communicator startled him when it buzzed with a new message.

Xisuma: Someone is messing with you?? I'm in the shopping district rn. So are Tango and Stress. Everyone else isn't active bc it's late..

Bdubs's brows furrowed. What? He checked the tab list. It showed that indeed X, Tango, Stress and him were active as well as the others being inactive. Then who was messing with him? Bdubs felt his heart quicken. Who was in his house?

Just as the thought crossed his mind, he heard quick footsteps up along the roof. Rushing outside, Bdubs just barely caught sight of the same intruder jumping down into the nearby ravine. Worried, Bdubs quickly took off and looked down into the huge ravine below. Nobody was at the bottom.

He glanced back nervously, before his nerves got to him and he found himself spamming rockets to get to the shopping district as fast as humanly possible.

He landed a bit roughly upon arrival, but recovered quickly and sprinted to find the others.

"Guys!? Guys! Come quick! I have a stalker, I'm telling you!" He shouted as he ran into the center of the island. The others quickly came to him, worried.

"Bdubs? Hey, you ok? You look pale!" X pointed out. Bdubs bent over, trying to catch his breath.

"Guys..!.. *huff* I... *huff* saw.. *huff* something..!" He spoke, desperately trying to regain his breath.

"Woah, calm down, dude! Tell us what happened!" Tango said, concerned. Bdubs finally restored his lungs enough to speak.

"One of you were trying to mess with me, I just know it! I don't even know how you did it! Just- man! Ya really had me for a second there, I was totally freaked out!" He joked, waiting for one of them to pipe up and confess. The other three hermits exchanged a look.

"What are you talking about, bro? Like X said, we have been here the whole time." Tango said, giving Bdubs a worried look. Bdubs felt his heart beat faster. That couldn't be right, he knew someone was at his place just then!

"What? Nah, don't try and fool me! I saw someone in my flower fields when I went to take off! So I went to catch them in the act, but they had snuck past me and gotten into my green house! Then I chased them inside and they slammed my door behind me, and after walking around upstairs they jumped into the ravine! Really freaked me out! You're saying you guys seriously didn't do that!?" He asked, growing a bit nervous and agitated.

Stress reached out and put a hand on his shoulder. "No.. promise! We were here the whole time..." she trailed off.

Bdubs continued to rant to Tango and Stress as X was reminded of a conversation he had with Grian just the other day. It was pretty random, but Grian seemed pretty freaked out. It reminded him of this situation, actually.

"Oh, X! Hey, just the hermit I was looking for! Say, we haven't added any new hermits without me knowing, have we?" Grian asked with an added nervous smile and chuckle. His eyes flickered to the treeline and back to X a bit frantically. X raised a brow.

"No..? Why would we add a new hermit without your say in it?" He asked, confused. Grian looked uncomfortable, but smiled and chuckled anyway.

"O-Oh, heh, just wondering! Thanks, X!" He said before quickly flying away, leaving Xisuma behind before he could get out another word.

"-X? X!" Tango called, bringing X back into reality.

"Sorry, what?" He asked.

"You zoned out on us! Everything good?" He asked. X nodded.

"Yeah, just remembered something a bit odd... You good now, Bdubs?" X asked. Bdubs was doing a few breathing exercises with Stress.

"Much, yes." He sighed shakily. Tango draped an arm around his shoulder.

"Hey, I know what will take your mind off of it! A new Boomers device!~" he called in a sing song tone. Bdubs lit up.

"Yes, right! Silly me! Come on, no more wasting time here, lead the way, Tango! Let's go!" He said excitedly, pulling on Tango's wrist like a child. Tango laughs and the two head off towards the Boomers shop. X and Stress exchange a shrug and part ways.

.

.

.

After Bdubs, the person to spot the intruder next was the one and only Joe Hills himself. He was in the shopping district having a look around when he saw someone creep back behind the rockets shop. Intrigued, he quickly went over to say hello. To his confusion, nobody was there when he arrived. Thinking he just missed them as they went around the back, he climbed up to survey the area from above. He didn't see anything. Maybe it was just his mind playing tricks on him, he concluded.

He was about to climb down and continue on with his day, when he noticed movement by Iskall's slime shop. A bit of a strange distance in that time, but no matter.

It was a shame Joe couldn't get a good look at them, but he recognized them to be the same as before, whoever they were. Triumphant in his search, Joe hopped down and skipped over. He hoped to catch them before they left in order to have a quick chat.

Joe slowed to a stop at the slime shop entrance, puzzled once more. They were gone? Looking around, he saw no one in sight. Weird...

"Joe? Earth to Joe!" Joe spun around to come face to face with his good friend, Cleo. She looked worried as she stood before him.

"Oh! Howdy there, Cleo! Say, you didn't happen to be buying slime at this very establishment just a mere minute ago, were you?" He asked. Perhaps his eyes were just growing worse with age, but he thought he could recognize Cleo anywhere. That person didn't really look like Cleo, with the flaming hair and blue-ish green-ish skin.

"Hm? No, why?" She asked, curious. Joe raised a brow.

"Really? Well, I guess I just saw someone else, then... I could have sworn I saw someone around here, and I just wanted to stop them and say hello! Can't find 'em anywhere!" He pondered. Cleo gave him a concerned look.

"Perhaps you caught the crazies, Hun! I heard through the grapevine that the other day, Bdubs was totally convinced someone was messing with him at his village! Thing is, everyone who was active at the time was here in the Shopping District! Honestly, I feel bad for the guy! He must have worked himself too hard and was imagining things. Can't even begin to imagine how much he freaked himself out. From what Stress told me, she even had to go so far as to do breathing exercises with him!" Cleo rambled. Joe raised a brow.

"Huh. Maybe there is a case of the crazies going around, then. I guess I don't have awful eyesight afterall!" He joked. Cleo laughed.

"Right, well I should really get back to what I was working on! I just came to pick up a few dyes for my puppets' outfits. I will leave you to it! Try not to imagine anything else while I'm away!" She teased. Joe laughed.

"Yeah, don't worry about me! See you around, Cleo." He bid goodbye as she took flight.

"Bye, Joe!" She called as she soared away.

Joe glanced back at the slime shop entrance once more, before sighing and walking away, making a mental note to inform Xisuma about this later.

Guess he really was going crazy.

[zallano]

The HereAfter, Chapter 9

Chapter 1, Chapter 2, Chapter 3, Chapter 4, Chapter 5, Chapter 6, Chapter 7, Chapter 8, Chapter 10, Chapter 11, Chapter 12, Chapter 13, Chapter 14, read on AO3!

Entire chapter undercut

-

Shortly after the event that took place in the outskirts of the shopping district, all the hermits returned home. Mumbo began his journey across the ocean in heavy rain and Grian flew back quite swiftly. The rest of the day was quiet and gloomy. No one talked in the chat or did much at all. Everyone waited for the sun to set and hoped that the next day would be better than the last.

When Mumbo arrived back at his island he didn’t feel motivated to do much. He dropped down into his bunker and sat there for a while, thinking about what to do next. His base was empty and plain. He leaned against a stone wall and sat there as his clock ticked annoyingly. Frustrated at the clock but more so at himself for being unproductive, he pushed himself up and opened a chest, and took out an iron pickaxe. He might as well try and find some diamonds while he waited out the night.

-

Grian didn’t sleep at all that night. He spent his time pacing back and forth next to his farms, not paying attention at all where he was going, and tripping over more shulker boxes than he would like to admit.

He had to get the clock back from Xisuma.

He had to figure out how it worked- he had to understand the clock. If he did, maybe there was a way to bring Tango back- if he had even gone to another time at all. Maybe there was a way he could get back to his world. A way to get everything back to normal.

“No,” he whispered to himself and slumped against the glass of his attempt at an automatic farm. He shook his head and ran his hands through his hair. His clock taunted him with its ticking. It made fun of him. It laughed at him for even thinking such a stupid idea. There was no way out of where it put you.

That didn’t stop Grian from wanting the blue clock anyway though.

He stared at his floor in defeat. His homesickness was getting to him. As much as he loved hermitcraft and all the friends it brought- it wasn’t where he belonged. He belonged at his somewhat small apartment complex with his best friends. He missed roaming the hundreds of new biomes and temples in his world. He missed building with all the different blocks his world provided him. He missed his world, and he belonged there.

Grian sighed. He needed fresh air. Possibly restocking his shop would be best. He stood up and walked over to his various shulker boxes. He rummaged around for a few minutes looking for his supply of quartz, gravel, and sand before taking off towards the shopping district.

He landed outside his cart and checked to see if he had made any diamonds. Unfortunately, he did not. Although that was because he hadn’t restocked the shop in weeks, possibly even months. He dumped the various items into the chests in the cart and stepped back.

“Hey, Grian!” A familiar voice called for him. Grian turned around. Ren was walking down the street making his way over. He waved. “Hey mannn,” Ren said in a dragged out tone as if he wasn’t entirely here but rather daydreaming. Grian smiled slightly. “Hey Ren,” he greeted. Ren stared at him offended. “Ren? I don’t know a Ren, man.” He laughed. Grian took a moment to realize Ren’s outfit. He was wearing a typical hippy outfit. “Ooh, right, hi Renbob, my bad,” he rolled his eyes jokingly.

Renbob smiled smugly. “I was looking for you, man. You got any eggs I can have or buy off you, man?” He asked. “And why would I have any eggs?” Grian asked. ”You should ask the man in the chicken costume!” He laughed. Renbob laughed with him. “I would, I would, but it’s difficult getting ahold of Poultryman these days, man,” he explained.

Grian nodded. “Ah, I see. Well, unfortunately, I don’t have any left. I gave my remaining eggs to Mumbo,” He quickly checked his inventory to see if he had a random egg. Though, for once, he didn’t. Ren shook his head. “Awh shame. Why’d you give the new guy eggs? I would’ve bought them off you,” his voice shifted back to his regular tone and he showed a diamond that was in his hand. Grian chuckled. “We kinda turned most of them into chickens so I don’t think I’m getting any back. Plus, it was a gift for him for taking the spot as a new hermit and replacing me. Why you need eggs anyway?”

“I’m making some cakes but I realized I don’t have any eggs. I figured you would have some though. Also- giving eggs as a gift? Well I mean-” Ren tutted jokingly. “Mumbo wears torn up clothes all the time and- well, unless it’s his style, I think you should do to him what you did to me, minus the flower crowns,” he gestured to his outfit. “And then, once you do that, I can get some eggs,” he winked.

“Next time I get my hands on some eggs, I’ll be sure to bring them straight over to you, Ren.” Grian laughed. “And yeah- I suppose I can do that. I am a talented fashion designer after all.” He grinned. “Hey- and speaking of eggs and cakes- They don’t seem very vegan, Renbob,” He smiled slyly. Ren pondered for a moment before switching over to his Renbob voice. “Mann, I’m not vegan anymore, I’m a vegetarian, man!” He took a massive bite out of a golden carrot and saluted before backing away out of the scene, leaving Grian standing outside his cart not really understanding what had just happened.

“Ow, my teeth!” He heard Ren shout from behind the dead coral shop. “Golden carrots are tough, man!”

Grian shook his head, laughing. Ren always managed to lighten the mood and make things seem better in times where it wasn’t. Grian smiled faintly and took off toward the direction of his base. Hermitcraft was his home, and as much as he missed his old world, he was okay with where he was now.

-

Mumbo had been mining for hours. He wasn’t able to find any diamonds anywhere. He had expanded his base out a decent amount. Though all he found was coal, iron, and the occasional redstone or gold. Mumbo figured that he would have to go down deeper in order to find diamonds.

He checked his chests for any ladders though he found none. He didn’t have enough wood for sticks either. There weren’t many trees on his island so he couldn’t make more. However, his treehouse did have a few ladders. Mumbo grabbed a few wooden slabs to replace the ladders and climbed up to the surface. He retrieved the ladders that hung against the tree trunk and made a spiraling staircase. He had to admit, the staircase was probably one of the coolest things he’s built so far- not including redstone- and frankly, he was proud of it.

He didn’t stay on the surface for long though. He dropped down the hole of ladders and began to mine deeper, placing the ladders he had as he went. He didn’t have to go far until he found himself in a strange two block high tunnel. There were torches running along the sides and the tunnels branched off into several different directions. “What in the world-“ He muttered, looking around.

Mumbo began walking through the tunnel he fell in. It looked like it went on for ages. Even squinting he couldn’t see the end. He couldn’t figure out if these were man-made tunnels or something that appeared in the future. He wanted to see how long these tunnels went on for, so he continued to walk.

For the most part, the tunnels were boring. They would occasionally run into caves but it appeared that the caves were already explored. Mumbo soon lost interest and the number of tunnels that went off in random directions made him overwhelmed. He wished that he had never stepped foot in these tunnels. Although, soon enough, Mumbo came across another ladder. The tunnels still went on from where the ladder was. Though the ladder was far more interesting, so he climbed.

The ladder went into a small room that appeared to be under construction or blocked off entirely. It had a white ceiling of the block that Mumbo recognized was concrete and the rest of the room looked like a cave that had been sectioned off. Mumbo walked over to a small area of the room where he could touch the ceiling. He took out his pickaxe and carefully mined a block of concrete and pillared up to the next room. He immediately recognized the place to the bottom floor of Grian’s base.

He quickly replaced the block, slightly worrying that he may have ruined it, and covered it by standing on it. Grian had to be somewhere around here unless he had gone out.

As if right on time, Mumbo heard Grian’s voice. “Why hello there, Mumbo Jumbo, I see you’ve found yourself in my base!” Mumbo looked up to see Grian on the edge of the second floor, peering over to look at him. He appeared to be wearing a different outfit to what he normally wore. Mumbo awkwardly waved. “Oh- Sorry- I found these weird tunnel things and I followed them here.” He explained.

“My strip mines?” Grian asked and fluttered down to the bottom floor with the help of his elytra. “Oh yeah, I guess they would connect to your base,” he pondered. “But what a coincidence you came here! I didn’t have to drag you over,” he laughed and played with some sort of long yellow measuring tape that hung around his neck and shoulders. “I’ve got something for you,” he walked over to a grey shulker box that sat in the middle of the room away from the others.

Mumbo raised an eyebrow. “Another gift? You’re sure making it so that I owe you something in the future, huh?” He asked, and took a step forward. Although, before he was able to walk over, Grian shooed him away and opened the shulker box. “Ehh, I’ve seen the redstone you somehow managed to make after Iskall taught you how it worked once. I could never do that. Maybe you can fix my broken farm,” he gestured over to a large pillar-like structure that was made of glass and had many layers of crops. Mumbo shrugged. “Haven’t gotten that advanced yet but I can try,”

Grian shook his head and hushed him. “It’s okay, but you see, Mr. Mumbo Jumbo,” he readjusted the cuffs of his outfit. “I’m the most talented tailor of all of hermitcraft, and I couldn’t help but notice how- well- for lack of a better word- plain your outfit is,” he said, obviously joking around. Mumbo chuckled. “We nearly always wear the same outfit! Just change the colors up a bit and give me a jac-“ he was hushed once again by his friend.

“No, no no, don’t worry about it. I’ll have you looking snazzy in no time,” he reached into the shulker box and grabbed a pile of red and blue clothes. He tossed them over to Mumbo. “There you go-“ he walked back and began placing trapdoors between the two of them as some sort of divider. “Try those on and I’m sure you'll love it!”

“Right now??” Mumbo asked. Grian nodded before realized that the other couldn’t see him. “Uh- yeah! You came here, so right now seems to be the best time.” He chuckled. Mumbo shook his head ‘oh, of course, we’re doing this right now’ he thought and quickly changed into the clothes. He tossed his own clothes over the top of the trapdoors.

“Uhh- Grian.” Mumbo laughed, walking out from behind the divider. He wore the outfit Grian would normally wear. A red jumper and jeans. The sweater was way too small on him and the jeans didn’t even go down to his ankles. 

“These clothes don’t even fit me-“ he laughed at how ridiculous he must’ve looked. Grian nearly fell to the floor at the sight of his tall friend. “I don’t understand- those clothes look all right! You can keep them, I have about fifty replicas anyway!” He covered his mouth, hiding his smile.

“Grian, why would you have fifty replicas of the same clothes?” Mumbo asked and the other shrugged. “Why don’t you?” He retorted. “Because why would I need fifty red shirts and fifty jeans??” He laughed, walking back behind the divider to get changed back into his clothes... “Oh no you don’t, come back here,” Grian unraveled the measuring tape from around his neck.

“I guess, if I must, I should get you some clothes that actually fit you.” He said and walked over. Grian held the measurer upside down and measured useless things about Mumbo. “Ever wonder how long your mustache is?” He asked, bringing the measuring tape close to Mumbo’s face. “Or maybe how far your ears are away from your eyes-“ he wrapped the tape around the other’s head. “Or maybe-“ he was cut off. “Do you even know how to measure a person properly?” Mumbo asked. Grian shook his head. “Nope!”

After a few more moments of Grian messing around and the two nearly dying of laughter, Grian stepped back. He reached into his dyed grey shulker box and looked through various different clothes for a few seconds before taking out what appeared to be a white dress shirt, a red tie, and some black pants. “Okay, got it!” He handed the new clothes over.

Mumbo stared at them for a few moments. “H-“ he shook his head. “Okay, fine, I’ll put these on,” he pushed Grian away from the divider so that he could get dressed. Grian walked away, looking quite pleased with himself and the outfit he got Mumbo.

“How did you manage to find an outfit that fits me perfectly- just by measuring my face??” Mumbo asked, walking out from behind the trapdoors. Grian turned around to face him and grinned. “A magician never reveals his tricks-“ he said. “But I thought you were a tailor-? Y’know what- never mind-“ he quickly tied his tie and admired his clothes. He felt a lot better wearing new clothes- rather than clothes he was given from the moment he began existing. He wore a fairly simple outfit. A white shirt and black pants with a tie that matched his eyes fairly well. However, he felt like he was missing something.

Mumbo reached for his old clothes and grabbed his jacket. Once he put it on and buttoned it up, he looked complete. Strangely enough, he felt like himself. He suddenly felt overwhelmed with emotion. This outfit was familiar though he couldn’t understand why. He couldn’t remember why.

He suppressed his other emotions and looked over at Grian and smiled. “And I can keep this outfit too, no charge?” He asked. The other nodded happily. Mumbo glanced down at himself. “Thank you..” he spoke quietly while he adjusted his tie to fit his jacket. “I appreciate it, really,”

Grian shook his head. “Oh no, it’s no problem.” He rewrapped the measuring tape around his neck. “Just doing my job,” he smiled.

Grian began to take down the trapdoors and Mumbo’s eyes drifted to his own clock. He picked it up. What was he forgetting- what couldn’t he remember-?

-

Thousands upon thousands of blocks away in HermitVille. She was wandering near a river searching for foxes and berry bushes. As she was walking, there was a shimmer in the corner of her eye. It twinkled as the sun reflected off of its surface. She didn’t know what it was- though, it was fascinating. She reached for it, trying to see what was partially sticking out of the dirt. Though, before she got too close, the shimmer exploded, much like a Creeper. She pulled her hand back in alarm and stared at what was in the middle of the hole. It was a clock attached to a string. She picked it up and wore it around her neck like a trophy. The clock ticked quietly and sparkled.

It was like no clock she had ever seen before.

[minedcrafts]

Icarus

Words: 5.4k

The Angst Squad (myself, @quartz-slab, and @nb-sponge) is back at it again with another fic! This takes place in the same continuity as our previous fic Respawn, so I recommend reading that one first.

This fic was inspired by this art, so go check it out! (Though, look at it after you read the fic because it spoils what happens)

It should also be noted that none of us are mods of @ask-elementalhermitcraft so this story and the previous one aren’t cannon to the au.

Anyway, I hope you enjoy!

----

Doc clutched at the soft fur on his llama’s neck as he watched the G Team base slowly approach below him. “Get ready to jump off,” he instructed Ren, who was riding atop another slowly-descending llama next to him.

“There’s no way they could’ve seen this coming!” Ren grinned and swung a leg over his llama so he was sitting side saddle, ready to jump off. “Just tell me when.”

“Alright. 3...2...1...Jump!”

They leapt off their llamas, the potions of slow falling they had used turned what would’ve been a deadly fall into a slow descent towards the roof of the G Team base. As they floated downward, a lone figure standing on the roof came into view, their back turned toward them.

They landed slightly behind the mysterious person, not making a sound when their feet touched the white concrete. Doc gestured for silence with a finger against his lips and readied his trident as they crept closer. As they moved forward and got a better view, the figure was revealed to be Stress. She hummed quietly to herself, indicating that she hadn’t noticed them yet.

Without warning, Stress whirled around to face Doc and Ren. She yelped and jumped slightly when she saw them. After stumbling for a second, she hastily leaped into the water elevator beside her.

“After her!” Doc yelled. He and Ren quickly followed Stress down the water elevator and into the main hall of the base.

Stress’s panicked noises echoed through the large room as she ran, leaving a trail of ice behind her on her way to a second water elevator. Doc skidded on the unexpectedly slick floor, but managed to keep his balance and dove in after her, Ren following close on his heels. For a moment after they entered the next room, Stress was nowhere to be seen, and Doc paused.

A large splash alerted them to Stress’s location. They followed the noise to a corridor with a hole marked with a sign that read “Down.” The invading duo jumped in, the slow falling potion still in effect, allowing them to glide slowly into the next room.

Doc immediately spotted Stress running up a nearby flight of stairs and shot a bolt of lightning towards her when she paused to glance over her shoulder at them. She narrowly dodged it with a squeak and kept running.

When she neared the top of the stairs, she waved her hand and coated the path upward in a layer of ice. They paused for a moment, then decided to take the other flight of stairs to continue their chase. The small hesitation allowed Stress to widen the gap between them for a moment, but Doc and Ren quickly started to gain on her.

With another glance over her shoulder, she turned into a side room. When the two rounded the corner, they realised that Stress had run into a dead end.

“Ha! You’re trapped!” Ren taunted, but Stress didn’t seem to be listening. She ran to a corner and stomped on a button on the floor. The sound of pistons moving alerted the duo, and Doc shot another bolt at Stress. However, instead of hitting his target, it hit one of the many pigmen that fell from the ceiling. The now enraged pigmen turned to face him, as Stress escaped out a secret door with a small giggle. They fought their best, but the sheer amount of pigmen overwhelmed them, causing both of them to respawn back at the Team Star base.

Doc sat up and pounded a fist against the blankets in frustration. “I can’t believe she tricked us like that!”

“She really had us fooled,” Ren agreed with a sigh. “I thought she was panicking for sure.”

“We need to get back out there. Let’s go get some new gear,” Doc ordered. He stalked over to the chest where their spare supplies were stored and pulled out his backup trident, spinning it once to get used to the slightly different balance.

After suiting up, the two exited the house atop their base. Doc looked out across the battlefield, trying to spot the rest of his team, but the fighting had moved closer to the G Team base, and he couldn’t get a good view through the rain that had started to fall while they were inside the enemy base.

“Let’s move,” he commanded. Ren responded with a small nod before they jumped down to the grass below. Hurrying over the moat on one of the bridges made during the fight, they approached the hill that was blocking their view of the rest of the battlefield.

Doc paused at the top of the hill and raised one hand above his eyes as he surveyed the scene. Both teams had scattered across the area into smaller skirmishes, making it hard to tell exactly what was going on.

Sporadic bursts of fire near the river told him where Tango and Impulse were. The two were locked in a stalemate, unable to really hurt each other, but apparently unwilling to stop their duel. Doc frowned. Everyone on Team S.T.A.R could see how much it was affecting Impulse to keep fighting his friend, but he always refused to leave Tango for anyone else.

Floating blocks alerted him to another fight. Wels was facing off against both Jevin and Iskall. Despite being outnumbered, he seemed to be holding his own, slashing away the slime and grass blocks being thrown at him. Wels made an advance towards Jevin, slashing at him with his sword. Jevin mostly dodged the attack, but part of his hand was lopped off. Iskall made the advance this time, slamming a chunk of slime into Wels. During his window of opportunity, he directed a small blob of slime at Jevin’s hand, which replaced the fingers that had been cut off.

A furious exchange of blades shifted Doc’s gaze. A closer look revealed it to be a conflict between Cleo and X. Scattered remains of zombies surrounded them, X having already cut down the zombies Cleo brought with her. They were now engaged directly, the fight becoming a seemingly endless loop of swinging, dodging, and blocking.

Flashes of red light drew his attention to the last of the smaller skirmishes. Mumbo was flinging redstone at False, but she blocked most of it and reflected it back towards Mumbo. He would then direct it back, which created a stalemate. A small scowl crossed Doc’s face when he looked at his former ally. The betrayal still stung somewhat, but his anger was pointed more at himself than Mumbo. Of course he was a mole. Of course he would side with his best friend. He should've seen it coming. Doc sighed quietly, then continued surveying the battlefield.

With a squint, he managed to spot Joe at the very back of the battlefield. He was partially hidden behind a wall, waiting to spring into action if someone got seriously hurt. Stress suddenly came into view from around the side of the G Team base, and she ran up to Joe. As the two started talking, Doc drew his gaze to the side of the battlefield. It was difficult to see, but there was a small slit in one of the hills. The only people Doc could think of that would watch a war from the shadows like this would be the Convex. Doc gritted his teeth at the thought of the capitalists profiting off of the war.

Doc looked up at the dark clouds for a moment. The stress of the war was starting to get to him. Neither side seemed to be gaining any ground, and the infiltration mission ended up being a complete failure. The strong winds and pelting rains of thunderstorms were normally calming to him, but today he simply found them... agitating.

Clearing his head, he turned to Ren. “You head back and guard the base, He ordered, “I’m going to help Wels.”

“Alrighty! The Ren diggity dog has got you covered!” Ren replied with a smile.

Doc sighed, but smirked at his friend as he hopped down the hill and moved back towards their base, his small quip of humor not left unappreciated. Getting back to the more serious business at hand, Doc started to move forward to help the outnumbered Wels, but stopped short when he realised something important. Where was Grian?

Doc scanned the battlefield again, but there was no sign of him. The storm was getting worse, and thunder could be heard in the distance. He glared, a spark running from his hand to the the tip of his trident. Where was the little gremlin? Was he hiding like a coward? Or was he-

His thoughts were interrupted by two shattering noises and a sudden yelp of pain from behind him, partially muffled by the pouring rain. He whirled around to see Ren, halfway back to their base, hunched over with both hands pressed against his eyes. Doc had seen this before - someone must have hit him with a night vision potion. Mixed with Ren’s power, that potion made him extra sensitive to light.

Doc ran over to Ren to help him. “Ren! Are you ok?” he questioned, the concern in his voice apparent. Ren groaned, but managed to mumble out “I’m...fine.” Doc was about to say something else, but the sound of glass breaking and Ren screaming interrupted him.

Doc immediately noticed that the world was suddenly brighter. Someone had thrown more potions. He whirled around, the potion’s effects allowing him to clearly see who the attacker was. Grian.

Doc felt the anger building up in him at a rapid rate. Behind him, Ren was groaning in pain, louder this time. Grian flew back slightly, then turned around, ending up looking directly at Doc. He hovered in place, holding another potion in his hands Another spark ran across Doc’s trident as he scowled at Grain. So he was still trying to hurt his friend, huh? Not on his watch. He quickly shifted into a throwing position, and with all his might, hurled his sparking trident at Grian.

It hit him directly in the stomach, and Doc felt a grim sense of satisfaction as he watched the enemy team leader start to tumble to the ground. Grian flapped his wings desperately, but couldn’t find the strength to fight against the pain dragging him down.

The storm was nearing full force, rain pounding down on both teams. Doc’s trident flew back into his hand right before Grian hit the ground a few feet away. The potion Grian had been holding exploded on the ground in front of him, about half of its contents hitting Grian and a few drops splashing onto Doc. A sudden swirling sensation filled his head, revealing it to be a nausea potion. However, Doc didn’t take the time to think about what that meant.

The flashes of lightning and cracks of thunder clouded his spinning mind as he approached Grian with a murderous intent in his eyes. His foe was lying face first on the ground, shakily attempting to push himself up. Every movement had him letting out quiet gasps of pain, and he only managed to get one elbow braced against the ground before he had to stop, clutching at the wound on his stomach.  

Doc stalked up to Grian and paused, weighing his trident in his hand as he looked down at him. The other hermit was seemingly too distracted by the pain in his stomach to react to Doc’s presence. Something inside him seemed to snap as he momentarily abandoned rational thought.

“You think you can just hurt Ren - any of my friends - with no consequences, huh!?” Doc spat out as he raised his trident, electricity running all across his body as his rage reached its peak. He no longer cared about the fact that when a player kills another player, they die permanently. Everything seemed to be building up to this. Ren’s scream of pain, the disorientation from the nausea potion, and the thundering rain compelled him to lift his trident above his head, ready to slam it down at full force onto-

Grain lifted his head up and stared directly at Doc. The normally playful look in his eyes had been completely eradicated, leaving only terror and pain. Doc froze as he felt his blood run cold. Grian opened his mouth to say something, but coughed instead, scattering drops of blood on the grass below him, bright red against the green.

Doc’s mind raced as reality happened before him, rational thoughts seeping back into his conscience. Was this really what he wanted? Did he truly want death to his enemies, his...fellow hermits? Grian looked up at him one again, this time with a pleading look in his eyes. Doc lowered his trident slightly, horrified realization crossing his face. No, he decided, I don’t want this anymore. This isn’t right. I-

Grian coughed again, harder this time. A second later, his arm gave out and he collapsed onto the ground. Before Doc could react, Grian suddenly disappeared, leaving only his items in a pool of blood.

“GRIAN!” Doc screamed. His trident slipped from his hand as he stumbled back, multiple bolts of lightning striking near him as the battlefield went silent.

The clash between Cleo and X came grinding to a halt, both shaken by Doc’s bloodcurdling scream. Wels whirled around with his sword still raised, and Jevin let the blocks he was holding fall to the ground when he looked up.

Tango tripped over his feet as the scream rang out, nearly falling headfirst into the river. At the last second, Impulse caught him out of instinct. The two simply stared at each other for a second, until Impulse regained his composure and pulled his friend back to solid ground. Once Tango was stable again, Impulse let go and they both turned to look in Doc’s direction.  

Stress covered her mouth in shock, and Joe murmured a few words of horror as he watched. From their hidden bunker, Cub and Scar exchanged worried looks before turning back to the center of the battlefield. False’s shield desummoned as she quickly turned to stare up at Doc. And Mumbo?

Mumbo let all of his redstone drop to the ground behind him as he rushed over, a panicked expression on his face. He scrambled up the hill and came to a stop in front of Doc, taking in the scene with wide eyes. His gaze caught on the bloody trident on the ground, the pool of blood gradually being washed away by the rain, and he slowly dropped to his knees.

Doc wanted to say something, to explain or defend or - something, but the words wouldn’t come. His thoughts began to race, his instinctual denial of self-preservation was slowly drowned out by the reality that it was his fault that Grian was dead. It was his fault. It was his fault it was allhisfaultand-

----

Grian slowly opened his eyes. The white walls of the G Team base made for a stark contrast from the gloom of the rainy battlefield. The battlefield, where he was... - Grian suddenly remembered what had just taken place. Before he was able to ponder how in the world he was still alive, he became aware of pain on his stomach and back. He pushed himself up into a sitting position, and carefully rolled up his red sweater.

A large scab had appeared on the left side of his stomach. That was where he had been hit by Doc’s trident. Eyes widening, he moved a hand to his back and sure enough, there was another large scab on the right of his back. It stung when he touched it, and he quickly drew his hand away. Why was it still there? He’d never had an injury carry over into a respawn before. Was the scar the trade off for him not being permanently dead?

Well, at the very least, the pain was only external, meaning that his internal organs most likely healed completely. As long as he moved carefully, he should be fine. He started to get off his bed. The pain immediately became worse, but it wasn’t unbearable. Getting back to the battlefield was of the utmost importance, so he would have to endure it. Once he was there, Joe would heal him, and more importantly, it would show the other hermits that he wasn’t gone for good.

He remembered what it was like, thinking Mumbo was really, truly dead. It had felt like the world was coming apart, the idea of never seeing his friend again too much to bear. And the “fact” that it was his fault that he was gone… it would’ve torn him apart had it been true.

As he slowly started to trudge out of the barracks, he thought back to before he died. The night vision potions were only meant to incapacitate Ren, not hurt him. He thought the his yelp was from surprise, not pain. So when he heard Ren scream the second time, and saw the look of rage on Doc’s face…

He needed to apologize - now. Swallowing his pain, he continued onward, determined to make it back as quickly as possible.

----

[Grian was slain by docm77]

The message sat inconspicuously in the corner of Iskall’s robotic eye. It didn’t really register at first; there had already been a few death messages earlier from traps and other defense mechanisms triggering. He’d been too busy fighting to pay attention to what he assumed was more of the same.

Then Doc screamed, and during the pause that followed, he got a moment to actually read what the message said.

His first thought was No, that can’t be right. Surely Doc, even as stressed as he seemed to be lately, wouldn’t go that far. He stared up the hill at Doc, trying to process what he’d just read.

Mumbo, apparently, was much quicker on the uptake. He must have started running as soon as he heard the scream, because he passed Iskall moments later, almost tripping in his haste to get to Doc. Iskall watched as he came skidding to a stop, looking down at something that wasn’t visible from his own viewpoint.

The sight of him sinking to the ground was enough to bring Iskall out of his own shock. He pushed past Wels, who didn’t seem to be paying much attention to him anymore, and climbed up the hill to get a better look.

What he saw confirmed what had already been proven true. Scattered items were stained red from the pool of blood they lied in. Doc was frozen in place, staring at the items as if they were a corpse. Which, in a twisted way, they were.

Iskall found himself in a similar position to Doc for a moment, too shocked to fully react. He wanted to look away, but something about the scene kept drawing his eyes back to it. It just didn’t seem real. How could Grian, the upbeat one, the playful one, be dead? It just wasn’t possible.

But it was.

He finally managed to drag his gaze away from the blood to look at Doc, searching his expression for some kind of explanation. It was hard to tell exactly what the other man was thinking; mostly, he just looked shocked. He waited for Doc to say something, anything, but no sounds were made.

Iskall didn’t know what to do, what to think, what to say. It felt like his grief and his anger were waging their own civil war in his mind. The conflict grew bigger, and louder, until it slowly started to seep out. “Why… How…” Suddenly, his anger gained the upper hand in his internal battle. “How could you?!”

Doc, finally broken from his trance-like state, tried to respond. “I… I didn’t-”

“Don’t try to defend yourself!” Iskall yelled. “This is your fault! Grian is dead because of YOU!” Tears began to streak down his cheeks as his emotions spilled out all at once. “You MURDERER!”

Iskall raised his hand, a large chunk of slime gathering around it. He was about to slam it into Doc, but something cold wrapping around his arm stopped him. He spun around, and immediately after was pulled down the hill by Wels. Scrambling to his feet, he got into a fighting stance, his tears still fresh on his face.

The rising tensions could be felt by everyone. Feelings of grief, anger, and an overwhelming sense of dread that this was the beginning of a bloody fight were unanimous. Even Doc and Mumbo reluctantly readied themselves for what was to come. No one wanted this, but this was their reality now.

That is, until another, higher pitched scream rang out. “GRIAN?!”

Once again, all heads turned to the source of the sound, which was Stress this time. They followed her gaze until they saw what caused her to scream. There stood Grian, hunched over slightly with one hand on the outer wall of the G Team base, and the other clutched around his stomach.

----

Doc couldn’t believe his eyes. He’d watched Grian die from the wound he inflicted, the wound that should have been a death sentence. This shouldn’t be possible. If it wasn’t for the other hermits obviously reacting to Grian’s presence as well, he would’ve wondered if he was having some kind of guilt-induced hallucination.

Joe had already run up to Grian, and Mumbo was currently sprinting his way over. Iskall, however, was frozen in place, seemingly by the whiplash from his shifting emotions. Doc considered following Mumbo, but the storm starting to slow down allowed him to hear Ren mumble something.

Reminded of what made him so angry in the first place, Doc approached his friend. “Are you going to be okay?”

Ren moved his hand long enough to open one eye, then immediately winced and covered it again. “...Maybe? I drank a regen potion, but everything’s still really bright.”

Doc frowned. “Well, we should get you to Joe so he can heal you. Can you walk?”

“I think so, yeah.” He carefully pushed himself to his feet, one arm outstretched for balance and the other firmly over his eyes. Once he was up, Doc draped Ren’s arm over his shoulder to help guide him, and led Ren over the hill.

Once they reached the top, Doc saw that the other hermits had gathered around Grian. Mumbo had him locked in a hug, and Joe had a hand on his shoulder, healing him to the best of his ability.

People went quiet as the two of them approached. Joe looked tired, but as soon as he saw Ren, he ran over. Confident that Joe would take care of him, Doc started to walk toward Grian by himself. But before he got close enough to talk to him, Iskall stepped in the way.

“What, do you want to try again? Stay away from him,” Iskall said as he glared at him.

“No, I…” Doc started, but he couldn’t find the words to explain.

“Don’t make excuses. You attacked him - you wanted him dead.”

Doc looked at Grian, but found his expression unreadable. He sighed internally. What was he supposed to do now? He wracked his mind, but couldn’t think of a way to make this better - to apologize.

Suddenly, a new, distorted voice was heard. “Actually, that’s not the case, as surprising as it sounds.”

All heads turned to face the newcomer, Evil X.

X spoke up first. “Why are you here? I thought you said that you wanted to stay out of the war.”

“I did want to stay out, but one of you just had to kill someone. Now I have to explain this to you lot! Such a pain...”

“Wait. Do you know why Grian respawned even though he was killed by another hermit?” X questioned.

“Oh? Did I forget to mention that little detail earlier?” Evil X remarked snarkily. “The only way someone can die permanently is if someone else kills them with the intention of having them not come back. So, I guess that means that Frankenstein’s Cyborg over here didn’t actually want Grian dead.”

Iskall stared at Evil X. “...What? He stabbed him in the gut! How could that not be intentional?!”

Exasperated, Evil X threw his hands into the air. “Well, then he decided against it at the last second or something - I don’t know!”

He still wasn’t convinced. “Why should we even trust you, anyway? You’re always causing trouble, so-”

Before he could finish, he was cut of by Grian placing a hand on his shoulder. “I think Evil X may be right. Right before I died, I saw the look on Doc’s face and…” he trailed off, turning to look at Doc. “...and I don’t think he wanted to hurt me anymore.”

Everyone turned towards Doc. The implications of this revelation were front and center. The leader of Team Star had shown mercy to the leader of the G Team. From a strategic point of view, that was counterproductive and unnecessary. But from a moral point of view, it made perfect sense.

Because at the end of the day, they were all still hermits - still friends, even through conflicts like these.

Doc slowly walked up to Grian, all eyes in him. He stopped directly in front of the other and paused, still not sure what the right thing to say was. After taking a moment to gather his thoughts, he looked Grian in the eyes and spoke.

“This… this war has gotten out of hand. It started with just a few pranks, and somehow it escalated into this.” He gestured between himself and Grian, then at the whole battlefield around them. “I was one terrible decision away from ending you for good. I was so close to…” he glanced at the ground for a moment, then back up to Grian. “This can’t go on for any longer, Grian, I - I’m sorry.”

“I’m sorry too, Doc. I didn’t think the night vision potions would do as much damage to Ren as they did.” The pair turned to look at Ren and Joe. Ren was still squinting, but he no longer needed to cover his eyes thanks to Joe. He flashed a thumbs up and gave a weak smile when he noticed them looking.

The two team leaders turned to each other again. “So... what happens now?” Grian hesitantly asked.

Doc didn’t have a response to that. He quietly pondered what to say, until the sound of footsteps interrupted him. Mumbo walked up to Ren, holding something black in his hand. He silently offered it to the opposing team member. When Ren picked up and unfolded the item, it was revealed to be Mumbo’s sunglasses. He put them on and glanced around the area.

After a few seconds, he looked back at Mumbo and simply said, “Thank you.”

And, with that small act of kindness, the whole conflict fell apart.

----

The storm slowed to a drizzle as awkward conversations broke out between the formerly combating hermits. False and Cleo exchanged a few shaky, but sincere words, promising to hang out later. Stress walked over to Ren to apologize for tricking him and Doc earlier, but he just smiled and started excitedly praising her acting skills, apparently not upset at all about dying to her trap. Mumbo was also talking to Ren, the latter telling a joke pertaining to his new sunglasses in an attempt to lighten the mood.

Jevin and Wels couldn’t entirely seem to shake off their wariness just yet, but after a few moments of staring, Wels quietly asked if Jevin’s hand had healed alright. Jevin shrugged and responded that it was fine now, and the two lapsed back into silence, although this time it was a  more comfortable one. Joe and X had met up occasionally during the war, so they more quickly got to talking about the bigger picture and what happens next. Iskall mumbled an apology to Doc for his outburst and for later questioning him so severely, but Doc responded saying that his anger and caution were perfectly justified.

Despite the tense air between them, Tango quietly thanked Impulse for catching him earlier. Impulse tried to deny that it held any importance, but in response to his stubborn retort, Tango pulled him into a quick hug. They both pulled away a second later, Impulse from surprise and Tango from his rashness. After staring at each other for a moment, Impulse placed a hand on his friend’s shoulder and smiled softly. He saw the tears well up in Tango’s red eyes, then felt them in his own as he pulled him in for another, longer hug.

Grian smiled from afar as he watched the two friends reconcile. Glancing around the area once again, he suddenly realized that Evil X had disappeared. Showing up and teleporting away soon after was typical of him, but Grian still wished he had the chance to ask him about why he knew so much about permanent death. Joe lightly tapping him on the shoulder distracted him from those thoughts, however.

“Do your wounds still hurt?” he inquired.

“A little, but it’s much better now thanks to you,” Grian responded, not wanting to worry their healer. “Is Ren doing alright?”

Joe frowned slightly. “He’ll most likely need to wear sunglasses at all times during the day, but he seems to be taking it in stride.”

“Well, at least that part’s good news,” Grian said as he looked over at Ren, who still talking to Stress and Mumbo. His gaze shifted over to Doc who was now standing to the side of the area by himself as he looked at the others.

Excusing himself, Grian walked up to him. “This… certainly isn’t how I expected today to end, but I’m glad it did.”

Doc turned towards him. “Yeah, definitely.” He stretched his arms. “If everything goes well I’d like to actually get some rest tonight.”

Grian nodded in agreement. He had grabbed some items while he was leaving the base, so he rummaged through his pockets, looking for some food to give to Doc as a small peace offering. However, the first thing he grabbed onto was...an egg. “How’d this get here?” he mumbled to himself.

Overhearing what Grian said, Doc smirked. “Oh, did the man in the chicken costume slip an egg into your pocket?” he teased.

“Uh- no! I mean yes! I mean-” Grian was cut off by Doc’s laughter. “Hey!”

Doc’s continued to laugh as Grian pouted and stomped his foot. An impulsive thought, however, turned his expression into a grin. He readied his arm, and threw the egg directly at Doc’s face. Doc immediately stopped laughing and glared at Grian as he wiped the egg’s contents off with his sleeve.

Grian froze. The logical part of his mind told him that Doc wasn’t actually mad, that he was just being playful. However, another, louder part caused him to look on in fear as it told him Doc is your enemy, he tried to kill you, he looked at you with those furious eyes and-

Doc shaking his shoulder tore him away from his thoughts. “Grian! Grian, are you okay?” Grian peered up at Doc and saw that he now wore a worried look on his face. The more logical part of his mind took control again, saying Remember the regret you saw in his eyes when he realized what he was doing, and how he apologized later on. He is NOT your enemy.

Grian shifted his gaze downward again. “I-I’m fine, I just…I’m sorry-”

“No, don’t apologize,” Doc ordered firmly. “I almost killed you permanently less than thirty minutes ago, you have every right to be cautious.”

“But I’m still here! I should’ve known better than to think that- that you would-”

Doc spontaneously wrapped Grian into a hug. He paused for a moment, then said: “Thinking you were dead, and that I killed you… It was a terrifying thought. I don’t ever want to feel - anyone to feel what I felt then.”

The doubtful voice in Grian’s head was drowned out as he returned the hug with a small squeeze of his own. They parted after a few moments, and Doc gave him a friendly pat on the back.

“No more fighting like this, ever.”

[votederpycausemufins]

more hermit!tommy because @petrichormeraki ‘s au is just wonderful

part two of that war i started, why am I focusing on the dsmp characters, i barely know them aaaaaaaaa

had one friend who likes dsmp a lot to help me a little but they were really busy so it was only a little.

When the members from the smp looked up, distracted by the numerous flying hermits, Grian gave a flap of his wings, escaping from Techno’s hold. With another flap he was in the air, giving the hermits an opening to throw down a barrage of potions. 

As they were moving, not all the potions hit their target, but even then, the harming potions did a fair amount of damage. In retaliation a few smp members used riptide tridents to get into the air and attack the hermits. They did enough damage to make the hermits retreat higher into the skies. They couldn’t be hit there, but it would be harder for them to send as many attacks.

Dream stared up at the figures obscured by the sun behind them. Maybe they would send some arrows down, but they were being too cautious. He smiled and called for the rest of those from the smp to advance. Any time the hermits tried to come closer to the ground, the smp members would start attacking. Even on unfamiliar ground they were winning, so Dream was sure they would get Tommy back.

Suddenly, two of the hermits swooped down from the skies, one of them crashing into about two buildings as they descended. Dream immediately ran towards them, knowing that after crashing like that, it would be an easy kill.

He ran into what seemed to be a main street, Techno close behind with Philza bringing up the rear. Seeing movement, Techno managed to grab one of the Hermits, they too wore a mask of Tommy, though it was cracked and dented. Dream joined Techno and was more focused on the person. “Ah, Scar was it? Masks don’t seem to be the best protection against crashing into everything you see, now is it?” Dream then yanked the mask off and crushed in under his foot. “We can kill you again, but it would be so much easier if you just hand Tommy over.”

“Well, uh, sorry to disappoint but he doesn’t really want to leave. Again, if you want to do the paperwork.” Scar tried speaking, but Techno stabbed him. Since he was wearing some armor this time, it wasn’t enough to kill him, but it of course still hurt.

“Nothing good comes out of government people like you.” Techno said gruffly. He nearly attacked again but Philza stopped him.

“Please. Tommy’s my son. You can’t keep him from me, from us. At least let us see him.”

Scar actually looked surprised by the words. “Wait, family? Does that mean-? No he would have- I mean I guess it would make sense. But your sons?” Philza paused, he was about to ask about the mention of sons, plural, but then Scar shook his head. “Well, again, paperwork and all that. I’d love to let you visit, but certain contracts have already been signed.

Philza’s blood went cold as the comment was followed by some mischievous giggles. He drew his sword and started looking everywhere he could. Dream and Techno were confused for a moment, likely not having heard what Phil had. “Vex.” was all he said and suddenly the other two were ready with their own weapons.

Behind them stood a hermit, also with a mask of Tommy, and he had wings on as well, but they didn’t look like elytra. Those were vex wings. Before any of the trio could react to this new foe, he simply gave a snap of his fingers and suddenly they were surrounded by vex.

While most of the chaos of the battle took place, Tubbo was pulled away by Fundy, both of them swimming deep underwater to escape the eyes in the sky. It only took a few doors to help them breathe before the two of them were sufficiently away from the battle. “Fundy, this is perfect! While everyone is fighting, we can go looking for Tommy.”

The fox looked unsure of himself. Of course he was going to be here when Dream asked, but this seemed like too much. Still, it’s not like he could easily back down right now. “Uh, yeah. In fact, I’ve got some inside info and I think I know where they’re hiding him. We just need to get to a nether portal.”

“Well there’s probably one in the middle of that island, right? So we should go back there?” Tubbo suggested, though Fundy shook his head.

“Everyone’s going to be there, so sneaking to Tommy and back would be hard. Besides, we’re right near some mesa and I’ll bet there’s a portal in there since it’s so close.”

Tubbo looked over at where they were swimming. “That doesn’t really look like a mesa.”

Fundy followed where Tubbo was looking and found he was right, the small islands next to them were obviously based in a mesa biome, but ahead of them there was a large landmass. It was half grass, and was that mycelium? Further on was a large first wall topped with green and purple blocks and words reading ‘turf war’. “Well, either way, I’m sure there will be a portal somewhere over there.

After a bit of searching, the pair did indeed find a nether portal, though it was on the other side of the dirt wall in what seemed to be a small town. Fundy was glad to see some signs with a familiar name on them nearby. He tried to pull Tubbo along, but it was a little hard with him being distracted by the area they have come through to. It was well decorated with Nether brick and warped wood, and hardly a block was out of place. “Oh god are they keeping him in here? Something this fancy must be a prison or something!”

“Calm down Tubbo, we’re right near the spawn nether. You saw their main island. Maybe it was really bad and they ended up deciding they had to make this.”

Tubbo didn’t look convinced, though Fundy’s excuse was weak in the first place, but instead of trying to argue, he just dragged Tubbo along a path.

By the time all the vex were fought off, the two Hermits that seemed to control them were gone. At the same time most of the smp group had caught up. While they were no longer in the water, they were now surrounded by buildings. And buildings meant cover from people with elytra.

They ducked into a large building surrounded by water, perfect for cover and for their riptide tridents. While most people focused on watching the skies and the exterior of the building, a few noticed the place was filled with chests. “Hey, check out the chests!” someone said and then more people noticed. 

While most of it seemed to be junk, there were also chest labeled with golden carrots and netherite tools. Excitedly the chests were opened only to find them completely empty. Well, the golden carrots had a stack left and ten diamonds, but with most of the people here in netherite, it wasn’t much of a help.

Suddenly, hermits were showing up, coming from the ceiling. Only now did they realize that the roof of this place had a giant hole in the middle. And while before they were weakened without a chestplate, the hermits took their elytra off now that the battle was close quarters. While it was disappointing in some aspects, it was good in others as now it was more of a level playing field. 

Dream stood back as he let the others fight for him. Someone placed a bed and they were mostly all able to set spawn points, though a few people like Ranboo and Quackity weren’t fast enough. 

With Technoblade on their side, the smp was making quick work of the hermits, but it seemed like there was an endless supply. Each of them wore a mask of Tommy which frustrated Dream and the rest of his army, but it also disguised their opponents, making it hard to distinguish them from one another. 

Eventually a hermit got to the middle and stole the bed the smp members were using. As soon as another bed was placed, it was broken. When they tried to kill the hermit, two more showed up to help with the chaos. It wasn’t long before there were no more beds to use and the hermits started whittling down the health of the smp army. 

In a panic to heal, Sapnap dug down, then there was the familiar crunch of him finding a cave. While he died, there was a bit of yells and screaming from below. From that, it didn’t take a genius to figure out where all the hermits were coming from. “They’re under us!” Dream shouted and then everyone was headed down. 

After the digging commenced, one hermit yelled out. “We’ve been rumbled! Call Zedaph!” Dream wondered just how one more hermit would be able to help. 

As the army started to surround the hermits, he noticed none of them were fighting, they were just picking up all their supplies. “Don’t bother! There’s nowhere for you to run! Try to dig out and we’ll just catch up!” He cornered one of the hermits and pulled their mask off as he swung his sword down. But when the mask was removed, a nearly identical face was beneath it.

Dream hesitated just for a moment, surprised to see Tommy there. “Hey green boy. Miss me?” Tommy smirked up at Dream and then suddenly he was gone. Turning around, Dream found all the hermits were gone.

[minedcrafts]

Begin Again

Words: 2k

Despite the date, this is not a joke fic, just a short story starring Cleo.

---

Cleo was excited to join hermitcraft once again for season 5. Dreams of the lands she’ll discover, the structure’s she’ll build, and the adventures she’ll have filled her mind as she set out. She had joined slightly behind schedule, meaning she missed seeing her friends and meeting the new hermits. She wondered what newbies were like as she left the spawn island by boat.

After collecting some sunflowers that were on an island she passed by, Cleo reached the mainland. She soon found a desert temple and claimed it as her own. After carefully looting the place so as not to make the whole structure explode, she returned to the desert outside. She basked in the warmth of the setting sun, simply happy to be where she was.

Completely lost in her thoughts of what to do next, she didn’t notice the hissing sound coming from behind her until it was too late. The explosion knocked her off her feet and sent her face first into the sandy terrain. Having not gained any armor yet, she was already almost dead from the one attack. Zombies soon spawned near her as she tried to get up, but found she lacked the energy. Muttering under her breath in frustration, she bitterly accepted defeat as the zombies closed in on her.

---

Cleo slowly creaked open her eyes. She was laying on her back, but instead of the starry night sky she was expecting to see, all that was in front of her was darkness. When she moved her arms, she realised that she was inside of...something, and that she had very little room to move.

Thankfully, most blocks are not difficult to break in minecraft, seeing as you can tear down a tree with your bare hands. By hitting the dark block was in front of her head, it soon broke, giving her room to sit up. Above her was dirt, which lead her to wonder why she spawned in what she assumed was a small cave. She had originally thought that someone was pranking her by covering the spawn point, but digging out a few more blocks revealed that she was definitely underground.

Creating a makeshift stairway in the dirt, she soon reached the surface. What she saw greatly confused her. Instead of the spawn island, she appeared to be on the edge of a community area. It wasn’t very big, only a few building filled the space, and some of them still looked incomplete.

She took a couple steps forward, but soon stopped. Something felt wrong with, well, everything. It wasn’t painful, per say, just… strange. She looked downward at her body, and almost immediately recoiled in reaction to what she saw. Her skin was no longer light peach in color; It was now a pale green. Her favorite top was ripped in multiple places, and a bit of her ribcage was showing on the right side of her stomach. She stared in shock at her hands for many moments, completely bewildered by her sudden transformation.

The sun rose behind her as she forced herself to focus. Okay, so she was a zombie now. How did that happen? She was killed by zombies, but many others have died the same way and respawned like normal. Nothing about her fate seemed that special… other than that it was her first death of the season. Maybe that was it, perhaps there was an error with the server that caused this.

It was her best theory for now, so she tried taking a few more steps forward. She was still able to move just fine, the issue was that her entire body felt odd. It felt as if she was inside of an almost perfect replica of herself. So far though, it wasn’t all that bad. She wasn’t in any pain, all her memories were intact, and the rising sun wasn’t setting her on fire. There were other non-humans on the server after all, so maybe all she needed was some time to get used to her new form. Maybe. Time will tell, she supposed.

Slowly but surely, she made her way into the middle of the community area. On closer inspection, the area seemed to actually be a shopping district. There weren't a lot of shops yet, so she probably hasn’t been gone for much longer than a week. She decided that she should probably hurry and find the nearest person before she worries the others with her disappearance any more.

The sound of a sword being drawn caused her to whirl around. She found herself facing none other than Joe, her old friend, who had invited her to hermitcraft in the first place. For the first instant she was looking at him, he had a small frown on his face, and looked like he was about to charge at her. However, once he had a moment to look at her, his eyes widened in shock.

“C-Cleo!?”

“Oh! H-hey Joe…” Cleo stuttered, suddenly made painfully aware of her new appearance again. She glanced away to the side, the continued. “I don’t really understand it either, but-”

Cleo was abruptly cut off by the sound of a sword clattering to the ground and the force from Joe running up and wrapping her into a hug. “Cleo! It’s you! It’s- It’s really you!”

She gladly returned the hug, but was a bit confused by Joe’s tone and choice of words. “I know I’m a zombie now, but you make it seem like... like…” Cleo couldn’t help but trail off when she heard the soft sobs coming from her friend.

“You… We- we thought that you… We found your body, Cleo! You weren’t respawning- We didn’t know… You’ve been gone for a whole season, I... we all missed you so much, Cleo...”

Cleo stared at Joe as she processed what he said, and a realization soon dawned on her. That small cave she thought she respawned in was actually a coffin. She hugged Joe tighter as reality set in. “Oh god, I’ve been gone a whole season!? You all must’ve been so worried, I’m so sorry…”

---

It took a few minutes, but the two of them eventually calmed down. Joe moved back slightly and looked up at Cleo. “How… how did you even come back?”

Cleo scratched the back of her head. “I have no clue about the whole zombie thing, but I came to right over...there.” She pointed to where she had dug her way out of her own coffin. “Should we check it out?” With a small nod from Joe, the pair made their way over, Joe helping Cleo to walk faster.

When they reached the hole, Joe went down into it for a moment, then quickly came back up. “That’s definitely the coffin we put you in. How did it end up here, though?” They stood in silence for a few moments, until Joe spoke up again. “Y’know, at the end of season 5, some friends we hadn’t seen in a while showed up at the portal to this season even though we didn’t notify them. Maybe something similar happened to you which automatically brought you here.”

Cleo shrugged. “None of my ideas are any better, so let’s go with that.”

Joe chuckled as a small smile appeared on his face. He turned and started to head back to the shopping district. “We should probably notify the others that you’re back now.”

---

Joe sent out a message that asked the hermits to come to the shopping district. Cleo was a bit nervous about the other’s reactions to her new form, but these fears were shoved away when they started to show up. While shocked at first, all the hermits she had met before were ecstatic when they saw her. Many hugs were given and tears were shed as they reunited with their once lost friend.

Among the people that showed up, there were three that Cleo didn’t recognise. The first two were Zedaph and Stress, who were the hermits that she never got the chance to meet when they joined in season 5. They talked to her about what happened after she died. Apparently, the hermits had tried many ways to revive her, including various mixtures of potions, beacon effects, and even loading a backup of the server, but nothing ever worked. While Cleo was sad that she caused them all to worry so much, it also warmed her now still heart that they tried so hard to get her back. She wondered to herself if one of those methods actually worked, just very slowly.

The other person she didn’t know was Grian. The single hermit new to season 6 was one of the last to talk to her. He greeted her quietly, but not shyly. After giving him a brief explanation of the situation, he gave her a sympathetic pat on the shoulder. He said that he knew the feeling of being the center of attention when the hermits found him alone on the new server. Wishing her luck, he headed out, and Cleo went back to talk with the others.

Now that the shock factor had passed, the chatter became more casual. Various hermits explained what happened in season 5. It was a bit disheartening to know that she missed so much, but she laughed along with the others as they talked about the pranks and mishaps, telling herself that It’s most certainly better than being dead.

Cleo also had a few conversations with the other non-human herits. She expressed a few of her worries to them about not being human anymore, and they cheered her up to the best of their ability. Doc specifically had given her a friendly pat on the back and said that they were now “Green skin buds.”

Before they knew it, it was starting to get late. Waving goodbye, the hermits slowly left to continue with their own agendas, eventually leaving only Cleo and Joe.

Cleo turned to face Joe. “So, what now?”

“Well, I’d like to check you over - make sure none of your limbs are at risk of falling off and whatnot, but that can wait till tomorrow. For now, lets head back to my place, seeing as you don’t have your own yet.”

They headed towards Joe’s Ministry of Truth, Joe explaining his plans to build statues in it, and Cleo expressing her desire to build a pirate ship base as they went. They soon reached the framework of the future building and headed into its basement.

Joe searched through his chests and soon after pulled out a cooked pork chop. However, when he offered it to Cleo, she refused.

“Why?”

“I dunno, it just doesn’t… look appetising, I guess. That sounds weird when I say it out loud.”

“Hmm…” Joe went through his chest a second time, and took out and uncooked pork chop this time. Suddenly realising how hungry she was, she quickly snatched it up and ate the whole thing.

Realising how fast she had eaten it afterwards, she gave Joe a sheepish grin. “Uh… side effect of being a zombie, I guess.” She chuckled nervously.

“It’s quite alright, Cleo,” he said reassuringly as he turned back to his supplies. Finding some wool and planks, Joe crafted a bed for Cleo and placed it down on the other side of the small room. Cleo hopped onto hers, and Joe started  to move over to his side of the room, but stopped and turned towards her. “You sure you’re alright? I imagine that all of this is a lot to take in.”

“Don’t worry, I’m fine.” It was mostly true. She still had her worries, but they weren’t nagging at her too much. Pausing for a moment, she grinned when she thought up a funny line. She put one hand on her hip and pointed the other into the air. “I’m no longer regular Cleo, I’m… ZombieCleo!”

Joe quietly laughed at her quip, and Cleo couldn’t help but smile proudly. He walked up to the light switch, and looked over towards her for the last time that day.

“Goodnight ZombieCleo.”

“Goodnight Joe.”