#so unless it was a friend i wouldnt do a team up

[cloudcountry]

since you guys liked my idea so much here it is: WAYS THE NRC BOYS WOULD MAKE YOU WORSE

reader's personality is based more off of in-game yuu than anything? this set of hcs is a bunch of hypotheticals basically. this can be read as platonic or romantic idk each guy is written as if they are the closest person to you, friends or otherwise.

IF YOU SEE A TYPO NO YOU DONT

mentally preparing myself for the "i wouldnt do that!!!!!" comments...and post.

Riddle increases your attentiveness to the rules tenfold. No matter how meek you are, he makes your voice strong—and oh boy does it carry. You’re yelling at people for running in the halls, chastising them for not doing their homework, and opening your mouth wider when you speak. For a school full of troublemakers like Night Raven, the entire student body is so disappointed there’s another Riddle.

Trey makes you more passive, less likely to speak up when you see something. He’s always stood back in the shadows, watching over everything without saying a word, and it’s seeped into your personality, too. You’re spineless now. This world is unfamiliar, why should you try to do anything? You’d only stand out. You don’t want to be outstanding. You want to be as normal as possible. So you stand back.

Cater gets you wrapped up in the hype of social media. It started out as a way to indulge his interests but now you’re on Magicam all day, scrolling and scrolling and scrolling. You send things to your friends and say “hey, we should do this” but never make any actual effort to connect with them outside of that. You fall easier into jealousy because you’re surrounded by glamor.

Deuce makes you reckless. He’s so willing to throw himself into things and it spurs you to do the same, no matter how many times your teachers or potential upperclassmen tell you not to. You can’t hear anything but Deuce and his yelling, his enthusiasm and terror for whichever situation you two find yourselves in, knowing that you’d follow him anywhere.

Ace makes you all the more prickly, your sharp jabs and irritating smugness a product of spending too much time with him. You two are two peas in a pod, but to an outsider you two just seem...irritating. You have a talent for getting under people’s skin and have definitely gotten better at lying.

Leona thinks its so cute how you try to defend him at every twist and turn. Like no, he is as dastardly as everyone is saying. Why are you trying to deny it? You’re suddenly seeing reason in the most massive ego-ed people this side of Sage Island and Leona honestly doesn’t know if he should be concerned for you or be amused because of you. (This one in particular was inspired by @loser-jpg LMAO)

Ruggie could have made you prioritize yourself more, but you think he took it a bit too far. See, now you’re snatching cafeteria items and worksheets right under people’s noses, giggling as they demand you give it back. Sometimes they don’t even notice you, but even if they did you’ve learned how to be lighter on your feet.

Jack and you are incredibly uncooperative people (unless you owe someone, of course.) He’s guided you away from asking for help, insisting that the people here will take advantage of you then turning around to say that he doesn’t care, he just doesn't want to get wrapped up in your mess. It’s like you can’t trust anyone but him and your Heartslabyul friends anymore.

Azul has given you one nasty sense of perception, allowing you to key into every little detail and find loopholes in the things people say in a second. He’s turned you into a deadly asset, one he treasures just as much as the student body fears. You read over his contracts and point out what you would do to get out of them, and he adjusts accordingly. What a fine team you two make!

Jade makes it clear that his morals are less than savory, and will often encourage you to partake in things you really shouldn't. You rationalize it as Jade helping you go after the things you want, to finally take and take and take from people when you’ve been so selfless all your life, because it's what you deserve isn’t it?

Floyd will often rope you into his schemes, and it's not wrong before you start doing the same. Once a model student, attending every class, you now skip class and watch with amusement as Floyd threatens another student, hiding your smile behind your hand. They may plead for your assistance, but who are you to stop Floyd? This poor soul clearly owed something.

Kalim instills you with a sense of jealousy and helplessness. He has money to solve all of his problems, his life must be so easy. You’ve lived through so many overblots and received no help from anyone, but Kalim has always been so kind and generous to you. It makes you resent him a little, and anyone else who tries to help, because they all have things that you don’t and that's just not fair.

Jamil twists and bends your mind so much that you can do the very same thing to others. You’ve caught onto his little game and he knows it, eyeing you with anticipation whenever you speak in the same honeyed tone he uses when he wants something. You’ve gotten scarily good at hiding it too, shooting him a smug grin because you know he knows, but nobody else does.

Vil brings out so much confidence in your abilities it’s borderline arrogance. You know you’re capable, so why doesn’t everyone just let you handle this? You can do it, they can’t. So they should just step aside. You’re not doing it to be mean, so why are they getting so annoyed at you? You’re just better.

Rook has some eccentricities, and you’re well aware of them. They put you off at first, but now you’re used to him. It just seems normal now. You’re not sure why everyone makes such a big deal out of his tendencies, that’s just how he is. He’ll stalk you, hunt you down, but he’s having fun! Don’t spoil it for him!

Epel is actually the perfect fit for NRC, you think. He’s a troublemaker, he’s stubborn, and he’s so, so angry. But he’s right! Why should you respect people who claim to be above you? It’s so irritating that they walk around with those annoying smirks on their faces. You two should do something about that, don’t you think?

Idia has a very specific way of talking that can not only be confusing, but can also irritate the hell out of people. Of all things you could pick up from him, you picked up his smug jabs and insults, accompanied by a tooth grin and a laugh. It’s unnerving how much he’s rubbed off on you, a true testament to how close you too are much to the chagrin of the rest of NRC.

Malleus finds so much delight in being your bodyguard, your most trusted companion, that he doesn’t even bat an eye when you use his magic for your own gain. You’ve gotten soft, molding to whatever shape Malleus wants you to be just so he won’t leave. You’re helpless without him, only he has the will and the magic to protect you. So won’t he please stay?

Lilia has a way of dodging the truth, putting a smile on his face even when he’s hurting. It makes you think that, if he can do that, why can’t you? Lilia is smart, he knows how to go about life, so you should follow his lead and bury your problems until they’ll never see the light again.

Sebek has done nothing but berate you for being human since you met him, and even if you’ve gotten closer to him over the course of your stay in Twisted Wonderland, you’re starting to think he’s right. If you had magic, if you weren’t human, you’d be more powerful. It’s a fact. You could do so much more if you weren’t so weak.

Silver has made you complacent. He takes each step carefully, protecting both you and Malleus, so why would you need to protect yourself in any capacity? It’s so nice, having this safety net. If you could, you'd rely on Silver forever, never facing the cruel realities of the world that are blocked by his strong arms.

[benjinoff13]

okay let’s talk about 3B a bit

the first thing i’m really really upset and disappointed by is how they handled cress and eloise’s friendship, yes i’m sad creloise will never happen (that’s what i’m assuming cause i really don’t think they would ever make 3 of the bridgertons queer), but i’m more upset about their friendship and mostly, how much they have messed up eloise’s character

it was said and implied in 3A that their friendship was a learning opportunity for them both, eloise taught cressida to be more open, vulnerable, honest and kind, this has definitely happened, we see that happen during cressida’s conversation with colin, she doubles down on they amount of money she asks for but i think we all know she had no other choice and frankly, i would’ve done the same if someone had said the stupid shit colin said, but we see her be honest and truthful and emotional

eloise was said to learn about her privelege, we were told that she was gonna learn that not everybody has the fortune the bridgertons have, not all women can afford to do whatever they please and go wherever they wanna go, eloise learned this in 3A and then completely forgot it in 3B, demonizing cress for taking action to safe her from being a victim of the patriarchy and the marriage mart, something eloise was supposed to learn about

we see how cressida was raised, she was abused, she’s treated like an object and she has absolutely 0 say over her life and her choices, eloise knows this but the second cress takes action to safe herself from a situation eloise knows she’s in, eloise turns on her because she’s starting to forgive pen, el takes it personal eventhough it has absolutely nothing to do with her, her family’s name is harmed a bit but that honestly doesn’t matter and it was purely circumstantial + it wasn’t even cressida who decided to do that but ofcourse she doesn’t even get the chance to explain herself cause eloise doesn’t bother

they could’ve helped cress, talked to her more, if they had shown genuine empathy and understanding towards cressida i genuinely think she wouldnt have done what she did but they just didn’t care and this is what made eloise such an awful friend, they made the friendship seem so meaningless the way el talked about it but you cannot convince me of this, they truly cared for each other, even got emotional when they know the other person is mad or sad with them, this doesn’t happen unless you’re genuine friends and really deeply care about one another, but when cress had to chose herself, el did a full 180 and didn’t even have ONE conversation with cress

i think that’s what bothers me the most, the sheer lack of creloise scenes which would have resolved the issue but instead the writers decided that el could only have one (1) female friend, what a tired and old school way of writing

penelope, colin and eloise were supposed to be the heros of the season, the beautiful love story, the team that protects their family and uses their lady whistledown power for good, but to me they were the villains purely for how they treated cressida

[plazsma]

I HAVE a Thought about jay walker and his comeback specifically in the next season. trying to understand the Psychology of these writers like i have a PHD in Ninjago writerology

i already have said that i really think cole is going to be the one to find jay, because of the whole set up in which nya said 'wu's voice led me to kai.' when cole starts hearing ghost wu talk. right. listen i will re-iterate that they genuinely wouldn't have had nya say this, if cole wasn't going to find..someone, because we (the audience) saw nya find kai! we watched it happen! we don't need to be told this disposition twice, unless its a reminder. which is also supported by how many times they mention something along the lines of '___ is still missing!'. and we know only two team members who are missing at this point. (three if you include Pixal, but i'd be so suprised if anyone but Zane finds her, if i know nj writers) i dont think it's going to be wu, because why would wu lead one of the ninja to himself when one of the team is still missing? wu will be found last, that is, if at all. so that leaves our guy.

but why cole? what is significant about cole finding jay? initially my one thing that was debunking this was this thought.. like why would they let cole run off on his own to get the silly guy back. especially if he made such a big deal out of staying back to protect geo and The Kids? but maybe the answer is actually pretty simple. maybe wu chose cole to do this, to get jay back, because it's canonly established that they are..they're just best friends? and guys, we all know what they say..

the best way to defeat ur enemy. yeah. u guys know. is to make them ur friend. micrdrop

maybe wu knows that jay has lost his memories, or his sense of self, and knowns that what it'll take to win him back is a close friend. we know cole canonly understands jay the best, (backed when he says 'dont try to lie to me, i know you two well')

another thing. it kind of just.. works? at the moment, cole is seperate from the rest of the team. like.. kai lloyd arin wildfyre nya sora are off doing their thing, zane and frohicky are back holding the fort, and cole is kinda rawdogging the merge by himself (+the found family). it makes sense for him to do this alone- plotwise (it's just neater. can u imagine the entire aformentioned gang pulling back up to admin trying to get him back? nightmare. wouldnt work) but also just because he's been basically separated this whole time.

i'd also like to imagine another crazy scene at the admin, where cole has to use his new powers to save jay out of corporate hell in some intense but also quite comedic way. but this is me getting ahead of myself. for now id like to leave this here

[mossycobbld]

Drawing a reminder to MarkxAmber using evidence from the comics as well (bear in mind is been over 10 years since I read it so some details remain iffy)

Amber had to always shove her feelings down for Mark, every time he disappears she doesn't have the luxury to call him, she doesn't have the luxury of thinking "well he's going to come back", she doesn't even have the luxury of being angry at him because whatever it is it has to be important (whether or not it really is important)

In the comics she hung out with someone and had a coffee date. He got a call from work asking him to come in and she already prepared a speech about how she won't be upset and she's okay with him going into work.

He told her he already told them no because he already promised to spend time with her and besides they had other people who could do the job and who didn't have other obligations.

Mark CANNOT DO THAT!

At this point this man is nothing more than a friend, he has no powers, but he does have an important job he loves and YET he can make time for coffee while Mark is always on Call.

In the show they had... something approximating a normal work life balance for about 5 minutes. Like Rex Splode promising to cover for Invincible for a night or two. And he told Cecil he needed a few nights off.

Not perfect by any means, but Mark did acknowledge that Amber was important and he was willing to push back and try for her.

Only for disaster to immediately strike.

And that shattered any illusion of a normal life with Mark and Amber. Amber will always be a target, Amber won't be able to fight back. She could be killed in less than a moment the only reason she wasn't killed was Anissa didn't want to kill her.

Even if Mark could keep his promises every time (which he obviously couldn't) this was always how it would end.

She can't talk about her dead grandpa (a moment most people need love and support through) because the world will always be ending, Mark is always healing from a fight. They can't go on a date because even if they succeeded and Mark managed not to fight the fight could just as easily come to him.

A parallel to his dad: Mark's mom knew from the beginning that Nolan was a superhero. Amber didn't.

Every moment Nolan did spend with Debbie he did try to make it romantic, he prioritized her, he went out to romantic dinners often, he flew her across countries, he spent time with her and even then Debbie said he was hardly around.

Even with Nolan refusing to join a team, even with Nolan refusing to work for Cecil, even with Nolan in at least one point, refusing to fight saying "Let Cecil earn his paycheck."

There is a metaphor there for the work life balance that appeals to me because I have a jard time setting boundaries. And I've been in Amber's shoes and Mark's shoes.

Neither are fun. But she had every right to walk away and I applaud her strength to make herself a priority and for the show going so far to show that she is right to leave and Mark was also right for being Invincible

I AGREE WITHH THIS STRONGLLYYYY

nolan — being one of marks important people in his life despite not being around incredibly often — had Definitely influenced mark’s relationship with amber. thinking it was fine to lie, to leave abruptly, etc etc. which made sense to some of the audience as well (ahem ahem , amber haters), the mindset that “Oh, mark is leaving because hes a superhero, he has things to do”. theyre only looking at marks perspective and refusing to look at ambes. and while that might be true that he has some form of obligation to save the world, who Wouldnt be upset that your partner up and leaves you. who wouldnt be upset that your partner lies and makes excuses, maybe even sometimes not making excuses?

which is why i think the choice that spiderman makes in one of the older movies to decline a relationship with MJ to keep her safe is a good choice. because unless youre prepared enough to balance school, relationships, and being a superhero, you have to make a decision because you cant have it all. which is something that is touched on in episode seven in season two. mark has to make a choice. because you cant forget that its only a choice, its a choice between putting yourself in danger, or putting yourself AND your loved ones in danger.

ambers character doesnt have an “improvement” from season 1. ive seen the comic dudebros say this. she only feels like she “improved” compared to season 1 because they dont like it when the girl dating the superhero doesnt comply with everything the superhero does. and lets be honest, its more than just trope divergence that makes those dudebros hate amber, and we all know it.

basically mark was never taught how to balance those lives personally. but he has definitely been influenced by his parents relationship. because of that influence, it lead to mark and ambers breakup.

let me know if i worded anything wrong because i suck at articulation 😓😓

[partywithoutsmiling]

I know I will probably disappoint lot of Creek fans, but honestly I prefer him canonically gone XD;

(This is by no means a post made to pour critique on Creek fans; I am simply explaining why he won't make any appearances in my AU past the necessary plot device in the first movie events)

I said in my previous ask that Creek is unempathetic to needs of any other creature but himself. He looks upon others- most likely subconsciously- in ways that would make them useful to him, not as someone whose life has an equal value to his own.

This calousness is shown in his remorseless acceptance of sending his whole Tribe to his death- even shrugging like 'what can you do' when he lures them out.

I called him chilling and that still checks, and I go as far as call him unnerving.

However, ultimately, he is a wimp XD;

I know there are plenty of writers out there who likes to paint him as a sinister villain, who'd go as far as to try and cause deliberate harm- and maybe if he was pushed enough, he'd do so, like a cornered rat

But really, similar to Branch, he wants to avoid physical conflicts, and especially wants to avoid any harm to himself. His greatest strenght was always his cunning, and being more aware of how to spin situation to his favour-

And yet, he is also so stupid and activelly sabotaging himself XD

(Srs, my guy, peacocking around under Chef's hand, confident he saved his own life, while not even trying to leave himself an escape plan- or leave a small thread of oppoturnity to allow him to be accepted back into his tribe)

He's the Peter Petigrew of the Trolls franchise, a Wormtongue level of villain. Confindent, self-assured and arrogant- but only when he is absolutely sure he has a backing of a bigger bully, unless he is the 'biggest' himself.

As soon as things get too hot, he bails; and while he maybe would have entertained going back to his Tribe after his betrayal, he would be on the bottom of the totem pole now; no power and no oppoturnity to get it back- and he certainly doesn't have the drive to try and redeem himself.

From story telling perspective, it would make him a rather poor antagonist. Annoyance at best, not even similar to Team Rocket who can be funny and heartfelt; just pathetic level of a villain really. He served his purpose and there is no need to drag his character on after that.

I just cant honestly imagine him being that interesting, in my AUs- because, since they are mostly from Branch's or Poppy's view, they wouldn't even notice that he's there.

He would avoid them like a plague; use the miracle oppoturnity of having a clean slate with other tribes to worm his way among them; in fact, he'd consider it a hindrance if any Pop Trolls showed up and recognized him.

But as I said, he's stupid.

In Wanderer AU, the Strings in Branch's hair would call to his powerhungry nature; he wouldn't even consider that Branch might have more connections among the other tribes than he'd even imagine; if an oppoturnity arrives where Branch shows up in a place where Creek lives (as he wouldnt have been caught dead roughing it up on the road), he'd see Branch alone, without the backing of the Pop Tribe or Poppy.

He'd try to steal the Strings while Branch is asleep. Eyes on the goal, not even considering the consequences. He just knows Strings equals power, and he wants power.

He'd be caught- and that would bring Branch's attention to him even being alive in the first place. Truth of the Traitor comes out- and since the alliance, the rumours would spread like wildfire and Creek would have activelly burned any bridges of goodwill he had managed to build, or that he could have build.

in Rock Beast AU, much the same- he'd try to find safety under the wings of a bigger bully, and alienate everyone because of it- no matter what tribe it is.

A wimp, and a fool.

This is why I said he never consciously used his friends- he doesn't have the capacity to do it consciously XD;; everything is instinctual, a learned habit, inability to function any other way.

Truthfully, he is not even a villain; antagonist to our protagonist, sure, but active villain? Ehhhhhh

He is just a hardcore oppoturnist, to the extreme; there is no real malice beside the consequences of his actions; he just doesn't care that deeply about these things; I don't believe he would ever even consider Branch his enemy, or a rival, not like Branch would have considered him back; Creek just really doesnt care about anyone but himself- and that certainly means he would never care hard enough to even muster the hatred necessary to plan someone's demise or harm

[popstart]

This is such a gweather win but at what cost. LIKE.... i can see the episode playing out like gwen being gaslit into thinking that this is A Good Idea (its not)

Heather convincing gwen to vote for leshawna because it would look really lame of her if she didnt. it would hint more to the audience that gwen actually cares A Whole Lot about her appearances and how people perceive her (since a lot of people think thats a super thrown on attribute for her to have in all stars) and it would paint gwen as less of a saint

i have a big problem with the way gwen is portrayed to the audience. The writers want her to look like this misunderstood girl so shes painted as this dick in canon but theres nothing about her thats like... even bad until s3 (s2 too with the whole breaking up with trent) but even then gwen was NOT in the wrong for that shit idc.

I think the meanest thing i can recall her doing is calling lindsay an idiot in episode one, when EVERYONE is caught off guard with the state of what wawanakwa is like. Her being in a bad mood is literally the normalest shit that happens in this show im sorry. this show cannot convince me gwen is a bad person, unless it did this. WHICH WOULD BE MILES MORE INTERESTING THAN HOW SHE IS IN CANON. gwen is so fucking BORING DUDE I HATE IT. let this girl be fucked up and insane and EVIL.

If they made gwen stab one of her friends in the back because of her own insecurity it would tackle like the two biggest gripes about the way she is in canon. It would set up her being this insecure freak more (there was also the episode geoff got eliminated. her disliking that geoff wouldnt like her according to her own insecurity but that was also tacked on as fuck) AND it would make her do something actually note worthily bad because of it. she could be actually painted as this underdog in the finale, especially if there were even less people on her side because of that. like seriously. why would half of the people that are on owens team be on owens team besides just being forced on there to make gwen seem like more of a loser. i dont remember owen interacting with majority of them and a lot of them dont seem like the party type. courtney comes to mind but also ezekiel (i guess hes sexist and thats the reasoning i forgot about that) and fuckin idk tyler and harold. AND EVEN THEN....... they didnt know about the party thing. lindsay switched teams when she heard about the party thing. idk maybe im just misremembering about the lack of interactions between characters.

and parallel to the way gwen didnt even vote trent out when he was framed for cheating, leshawna could have seen that heather framed gwen as well. (i think it suits leshawnas character miles better to be forgiving idk. like tda can push this agenda that leshawna is secretly awful but that shit is so unreal to me) gwen could be thinking all day next episode about how bad she feels about voting for leshawna, for letting her insecurities get the better of her, but Gwen and leshawna could make up and be bffs again in the finale. would it be too much to have this thing between both gwent and gweshawna in the same episode? idk maybe. im here to spitball not to be an actual writer (if i were to be an actual writer i would fix gwent from being terribly and awfully executed throughout literally the entire season. pacing issues eaughh.)

this isnt even mentioning how bullshit leshawnas actual canonical elimination is but its talked to death so im not talking about it because i dont really care enough i cant lie.

i hate the writing in tdi so much sometimes actually though. I think if they went this route it would actually be executed shittily bc thats just how it goes in td episodes. like it would be the certifiably worst episode in the entire series barring maybe sundae muddy sundae LOL. au where total drama is good and im not obsessed with the shittiest fucking show on the planet that i actively hate but cant get enough of

[gordon-freeman-phd]

honestly, how do any (or all!!!) of your OCs feel about Gordon? You have a lot of interesting, multifaceted takes on how Gordon is perceived in the HL2 world, and I’d love to hear how your peeps fit into that

wishing for all is like a monkeys paw on your part, cuz i have quite a few, god speed with reading all this o7 ill be going in order as they appear on my master post of ocs, ill pu tthis under a read more since its soooooooo long

Brock Fuentes: previously knew of Gordon before the rescas, got piss scared of him during the res cas when he refused to help gordon open some doors becuz he was to scared to leave his hidey hole so gordon man handled him and slapped him around a bit. so by the time of half life2, hes had people around him who believed in the messianic nature of gordon which is quite the departure from his memory of both the up-tight asocial man he heard about and the violent forceful deranged man he met. if he were to see gordon acting much the same now or hear about people having that pure image they had be shattered hed feel a bit vindicated

Richard Montague: He roomed with gordon before the rescas and thought he was a pleasant roomate if not somewhat intimidating due to his serious and minimal socialization, but by the time the rescas happened, they were amicable sorta friends. At most during the rescas he might have heard that gordon was killing swathes of soliders which would be terrifying knowing how much he was struggling to survive in comparison. BY half life 2, gordon is mostly a memory and he had been mostly innundated from resistance culture, having spent most of his time working for the combine using his background in biology to help with xen infestations, so he heard more propoganda against gordon freeman if anything. he doesnt really believe it but it sticks around mentally and mixes with his knowledge of fondness for gordon. eventually when he teams up with the resistance after fleeing the city, he hears more about gordon from their point of view occasionally, which sits better with him, but ultimately, what the perspective of gordon is doesnt matter much to him since hes more focussed on not dying. then when gordon comes back and people start talking about how he acts its concerning and sounds unreal so he doesnt really believe its actually gordon unless he sees him for himself since it sounds so unlike the man he knew.

Jill Pobst: she sadly doesnt make it out of the rescas, but she knew gordon during it, at that point he was still mostly mentally present, and was still learning the curve of combat so she helped him out before her death. he was just a lab coat who was less of a coward than most and didnt talk much

Isiah Poole: he worked at black mesa before the rescas, his sector of work was far removed from sector C, but he wouldve heard of gordon thru the newspaper. post rescas, gordon wouldnt have likely come up where isiah is existing in anyway that would have a permanant impact on his psyche

Knipex: as a borrower in black mesa, they arent super clued in to the personnel and any drama that arent posing a direct threat to the colony and post since theyre with isiah most of the time, they also arent going to hear much about gordon post rescas

Timmy Ridgewell: grew up under the combine so for most of his life, he wouldve heard only the propoganda about gordon and the resistance in general but as he gets older hell start running into the resistance and slowly hearing more about gordon as a messianic figure, but he is rather ressiitant to the concept since it just doesnt make sense, so hes more of a distant saint figure than some greater power who can actually help anyone, and hes almost sore about gordon coming back in hl2 and being real, but also disappointing his friends by being less than stellar personality wise

Bagels: Behind the guise of just a cat, Bagels is actually a controller, and harbors a great deal of resentment towards gordon for destroying everything the nihilanth had built to escape the oppression of the combine, and is smug over everything gordon did failed to protect his people in the long run, but still is willing to work alongside the resistance so that the combine is toppled, the enemy of my enemy is my friend and all

Angus and Ed: also only knew minimal second hand knowledge of gordon through the newspapers, and have been living in xen since the rescas (and one of them is just dead) so their knowledge of gordon never updates with time

Galvanizer: just a lil rollermine, isnt sapient, nor has audio receptors and never meets gordon to form an "opinion" of him

Fred Otten: didnt read the newspaper or socialize much with people who wouldve known gordon while he worked at black mesa so he didnt know gordon really existed, and post rescas, he is willing to whore himself out for the combine for a variety of reasons, so even if he doubts one man could do anything that big, hes willing to accept the propoganda idly however and when gordon does return hes very motivated to kill him for the reward and any rewards unofficially that he can et his hands on even if he is terrified of what gordon is capable of based on the years of propoganda hes internalized

Robert Briggs: he knew gordon through Richie, met him a couple times, he thinks hes somewhat rude sometimes but ultimately kinda harmless and nice in his own way. he doesnt survive the rescas so his opinions of gordon never changes

V-8751: during the rescas it knew that gordon exitisted and that he was a high priority target, but never ran into gordon and was isolated from people who would know of gordon for most of its life post rescas even during hl2 before it made friends with cicada who both has their own experiences with gordon and access to the rest of the knowledge and opinions of the rest of the vorts thrut he vortessence, so learning about what happened to the nihilanth whats happened to him the variety fo opinions about gordon, kinda confuses it and its just a lot fo conflicting information so since he isnt important to the life its living, V-8751 so it sorta lets all that information settle without much concern, at best is glad he killed the nihilanth, and regards the way fletcher treats him as kinda strange

Fletcher Lamb: spent time in a variety of places before leaving the purview of the combine, so heard a variety of rumors about gordon before he left the sphere of influence that gordon has reputationaly, so she holds him in regard as a sort of icon but only loosely treats him religiously, she treats his name the way that people treat a piece of candy that supposedly keeps a computer system running, it comes up when things get rough and is kept quietly in place to be effective but isnt a main focus of his life until something goes wrong

Cicada: was nearly killed by Gordon and had many friends killed by him as well so is rightfully afraid of and dislikes gordon, even if they knows in teh past present and future that gordon frees them, but because of thier hyper connection to the vortessence, much of their personal opions are muted and mixed with the wider consensus on gordon (and most things) in a way that can be confusing and more uncertain than most vorts are perceived as

Felix Kessler and Alexis: prior to hl2 as metrocops, they both didnt really care about gordon as a figure in propoganda since he wasnt anything that could further thier careers since eh wasnt real, at best Alexis was annoying enough about his job to learn as much as he could about gordon to better identify what he thought could be secret organizational code talk which did result in innocent people getting killed or punished, during hl2, they are both very annoyed that they werent put on the case to kill gordon, and felix in particular is vying to be deployed near gordons predicted path since of the two hes the less despised of the pair

Antoine-Valery Veilloux: travels around a lot so has seen a lot of different interpretations of gordon and has even met people who knew him, so he doesnt really buy into him as a god or saint like figure, but knows he did a lot of the things people claim he did, just not as bombastic, thinks he was a bad ass guy but uses his name as a expletive for fun (ie, freeman damnit, oh for freemans sake)

Damned Crows: didnt pay much attention to anything the human residents of white forest say outside something they find funny, but once gordon is on his way to white forest, they pick up on his arrival and mostly watches since things seem tense. from a distance they can tell that gordon is respected by most if not all the humans of white forest but also they think hes kinda scary and theyd rather not tangle with him

[thenixkat]

decided to pull up The OMAC Project to see what happened after Ted's death they threw his ass in the incinerator

writer said Ted got graphically shot in the head and then incinerated his ass is not coming back he's * dead*

this does not deter me from having Khaji Da go 'yer not allowed to die yet' at Ted and keep him alive, conscious, and heal him from the damage

(also the implications that Dan was conscious the entire time he was trapped underground and mortally wounded do help explain why he was fairly easy for the Scarab to overpower)

wild that Blue Beetle 2 and many of his nonsuper but hero associates are getting the meta-human label

they arent metahumans Brother Eye has Batman listed as his creator, which fiar Batman did make it. Tho I doubt that Brother Eye gets considered part of the Batfam

dont want to have to kill Batman…yet. ANd Brother Eye seems to be fine with that

granted given how it was firmly on Ted's side in the dark multiverse au when Ted went against Batman, it probably doesn't have much loyalty to its maker Overthrow and Rocket Red are two guys with high tech suits! They arent metahumans, you should make yer computer better with terminology to more accurately assess shit

unless Batman was over there labeling everyone in a costume as a metahuman

Sasha? apparently Batman's ex??? Took Ted's goggles to send a warning/message about what's going down. ANd i guess if Ted never got wrecked, she wouldnt have been able to get word out and the world would have been doomed

yeah other knight lady does have a point. Given the shit that went down in Countdown, who would have believed Ted if he told people what he found? Hell, yall could have just locked him up in yer fortress and tried to make him come around to the idea of being on yer side or brainwashed him. Killing Ted was unnecessary and messy and bad for morale

also Brother Eye is watching everyone at Checkmate. ANd yeah being constantly watched by a homicidal brainwashing boss would not be great for team unity or morale

folks seriously need to get on Batman's ass about the spy satellite

Booster got out of the hospital and Wonder Woman actually following up on what she was talking with Ted about now that she's not busy

ALso loved that Skeets was referred to as having been killed, being treated like a person who got murdered and not just a robot that got taken apart and used for parts

again, I am bothered that folks made a mystery involving Ted but didnt bring in Vic Sage/The Question who is also his friend and this shit would have been right up the man's alley

like do we even get an explanation for why Vic couldnt be here in this or Countdown other than the writers wanted Ted to be alone and forgot that he has close friends outside of Booster Gold?

Did no one who watched the skies for a living question Batman's spy satellite and what authorizations it had?

we also need to get on Black Canary, Hal Jordan/Green Lantern, Hawkman, Green Arrow, and Zatanna's asses for deciding that brainwashing supervillains to 'not be evil anymore?' which is yikes! ANd double yikes for deciding to brainwash Batman to forget the incident when he caught them and had an issue with it. That;s not hero behavior. Like Batman deserves to get shit for the murderous spy satellite and the others need to get shit for mentally violating people

like everyone involved fucked up in this situation and in response to this situation

Batman, just cause you got mentally violated by a handful of superheroes doesnt mean you get to invade every superheroes' privacy at all times

people are rightfully pissed at Batman who does not apologize for violating everyone's privacy or his satellite being used to hospitalize Booster, destroy Ted's home and one of his Bugs, and lead to Ted's murder. Batman got hurt by a handful of people so its ok by his reasoning to fuck over everyone in the superhero community

and of course the actions of the satellite he built arent his fault if someone stole it to use it as intended more or less with all of its capable of killing people functions intact. Like…honestly Booster may have been onto something. Does Brother EYe have a death laser b/c Batman's plans to deal with any hero who crossed the line again were to straight up murder them?

yeah actually Batman had some info that he could have shared with Ted that could have been helpful in him not dying and chose not to give it b/c a desperate fellow hero asking for help wasnt worth his time. Batman had bigger things to worry about and didnt stop to question if maybe the cases were related. Unfortunately, Booster isnt allowed to shoot Batman. He should, I'd like it, but no not allowed

Booster hitting it out of the park. Batman is not going to admit he was wrong or that he got Ted killed and Batman wont be held responsible for any of the people his spy satellite endangers or kills even tho it is his fault

And Maxwell Lord does use the shit that was built into Brother Eye to kill people, like Batman why the fuck did you add a death laser to yer satellite in the first place? Max has Brother Eye activate an OMAC and murder Overthrow (one of Ted's villains) as a fucking distraction for the Justice League

Just Batman is at fault and could have stopped a lot of shit sooner, saved some lives, by coming forward with shit sooner At least Checkmate does attempt to murder Max b/c his Big Brother shit and murdering folks unnecessarily is a bit much

too bad it doesnt work out huh the secret society that spies on everyone and fingers in every pie and shit didnt know Maxwell Lord was a meta somehow. There's shit that should be on his medical records or ya know just fucking ask the League and they should have known. But no, they didnt know Max can mindcontrol/brainwash people and they're gonna die for their lack of knowledge

And Batman's internal monologue of no one understands and he had to violate everyone's privacy and not tell people shit. So yeah, Booster's right Batman is never going to take responsibility for all the people he endangered and got hurt or killed with teh Brother Eye shit. Max figures out Sasha is the mole

yeah yeah (mocking voice) Batman;s so bad ass you'll need multiple metahuman slaying robots to neutralize him b/c normal man in a cape is just so powerful so skilled so bad ass (/end mocking voice)

[pastanest]

if you’re wondering why I’m having to repost this, or why you were perhaps previously following me but no longer are, please refer to this post. I was able to retrieve this thanks to @dreatine - thanks so much!! ♡

Spencer Reid x she/her!reader

Secret Admirer

He really doesnt know how you dont notice. The way he laughs at any joke you make, how his eyes follow you around the room wherever you go, how nothing can possibly distract him from you because he’s distracted by you constantly. Doctor Spencer Reid, 99% of the time the highest IQ in any room he walks into, and you have him completely baffled.

He doesnt even need to look up to know it’s you that’s just walked in. It could be you or Derek since you are the only two not yet at work, but some part of Spencer has a sixth sense for you, and his eyes immediately abandon the pages of the book in front of him. There you are, strolling in like a goddess, that same gorgeous smile on your face that you greet all your coworkers with. He waits just a few seconds, and that very smile falls on him.

“Good morning Spencie!” You call out.

He grins back at you and lets go of his book with one hand to wave at you. Spencie. People have referred to him as Spence before, but Spencie? That was something entirely unique to you. For a while, Derek and Rossi made fun of it and referred to him as “Spencie”, too. It was no discredit to you, it was purely because Spencer was never embarrassed to hear you call him that, which all his professional profiling friends knew meant one thing: he liked it, and that was cause for some light bullying. At first, Spencer was mildy irritated by it, but they never made the jokes when you were around, and because you were never given the chance to potentially take offence, it didnt take long for him to discard all negative reactions, and his friends realised his positive feelings towards you were stronger than they thought.

Of course the entire team knew. Did he really think a room filled with profilers wasnt going to pickup on his big fat whopping crush? Spencer knew they’d figure it out eventually. What shocked him most was your obliviousness. He made no real effort to hide his feelings towards you, he couldnt. He gave you at least one compliment a day, whether it related to something you said on a case, remembering someone’s coffee order when they didnt even ask you to get them a coffee, or regarding a new hairstyle you’d tried out. He got very protective of you whenever a case turned dangerous and you were at risk. Spencer knows you are trained and can take care of yourself, but that doesnt mean he wont fear for your safety. The only way he could make his feelings more obvious would be to walk up to you and tell you he’s in love with you, which he couldnt possibly do. He’d rather get shot. Again.

“You should do something for her on Valentine’s Day.” A quiet voice speaks from behind him, Emily.

Spencer tears his gaze from you and clears his throat, staring back down at his book. Even though the entire team knew, he wasnt just going to admit it.

“I dont know what you’re talking about.” He says.

Emily sighs. “Sure you dont. All Im saying is, the tradition of being something synonymous with confidential adorer, might be your best shot at figuring out if she’s interested without just asking her out.”

Emily walks away from Spencer before he has the chance to reply, even though he probably wouldnt have, given that his mind has been blown by what she just told him. Something synonymous with confidential adorer...secret admirer! That might not be a bad idea! And with a week until Valentine’s, he has plenty of time to plan this one out.

Despite Spencer Reid’s brain being a working miracle, he decided to note down his plans, just to make sure he didnt forget anything. Even though it is literally impossible for him to forget anything, unless it traumatises him to the extent of needing a hypnotist to unlock memories for him. But that was years ago.

Red roses. Those were on the list, but he couldnt buy them in bulk. He would have to buy the first ones individually for his first idea, the final dozen were the last part of the plan.

For the next week, everyday when you walked into work, there was a single red rose waiting on your desk. On the first day, you laughed and picked up the rose, looking around and asking who was pranking you. When nobody joined in your laughter, you realised that someone had left you a rose with intent, and that everyone on the team knew that. Spencer analysed the reason behind your laugh, and based on previous conversations with you in which you admitted you’d never been anyone’s Valentine, he concluded that you didnt believe anyone could have enough of an interest in you to treat you that way, because it had never happened. On the second day, you were shocked and silent, blushing and quietly sitting down at your desk, twirling the rose gently around your fingers. On the third day, you walked in and just grinned from ear to ear the moment you saw another rose waiting at your desk. On the fourth day, the team was called in at 4am, and you ran in, hoping to catch out the mysterious rose-deliverer, but even then there was a rose waiting. Your tired eyes teared up at that. On the fifth day, you squealed and jumped around everyone’s desks, clutching the rose and running to Penelope’s office to show it to her. On the sixth day, your entire being lit up at the sight of the small piece of paper sitting next to the rose. Spencer studied how you immediately attached yourself to his words, the fact you hadnt received a note with any of the previous roses put so much weight on the few words.

You are the most beautiful person in the world, to me, and to everyone that has ever met you.

Your back was to him when you read the note, but he heard you sniffle, then take a deep breath and hold the note to your chest, before you tucked it away carefully in your bag. Though you got plenty of work done that day, your eyes drifted to the rose beside you every minute or so.

On the seventh day, Valentine’s Day, you walk into the office slowly, almost hesitantly. When you see the rose there waiting, you smile sadly. Spencer frowns as you pick it up and hold it to your chest.

“The last one.” You chuckle, and Spencer understands. You think that‘s it, it‘s over. He smiles to himself and glances back down at the files on his desk, reassuring himself that later on today, that sadness will disappear. Or in fact, in a few seconds.

This time, the note is in an envelope, which you gently tear open, as though even the envelope is precious because it’s from the rose-sender.

Happy Valentine’s Day, gorgeous.

Instead of making everybody else a coffee, why dont you just make yourself one?

You freeze, and Spencer can practically hear the cogs turning in your head. In seconds, you speed over to the coffee machine, and sure enough there’s another note.

We’ve worked on many cases, some were a botch, but if you really want to know who I am, maybe you should ask…

“HOTCH! GET YOUR ASS DOWN HERE!” You shout as you sprint to his office door.

Aaron laughs and opens his door, handing you another note with a smile.

Although you’re only finding out about this now, my affections for you have lived far longer than a year. If you want to find out more, visit the person whose surname rhymes with “year” (but only if you pronounce “year” with a British accent).

He admits those poems are not of the highest quality, but he was nervous! Not to mention, he wasnt exactly worried about iambic pentameter, more so making sure you could figure out what he was saying.

You burst out laughing. “PENELOPE GARCIA I AM ON MY WAY!” And then you’re running to her office.

Spencer cant see your reaction to his next note from where he’s sitting, he cant make it obvious that he’s the culprit so he has to stay in his seat. However, when you return to your desk with a pouty face, Rossi asks what’s wrong before Spencer gets the chance to. You show him the note you got from Penelope.

Im afraid that when it comes to being confronted by you in the daylight, Im a vampire. But trust that you will see me soon. In fact, you’ve already seen me, countless times.

“How can I trust them when I dont know who they are?” You ask the group as they form a circle around you.

JJ wraps an arm around you reassuringly. “Whoever it is, you know them and you trust them, you know that, you just havent linked their personality to these events.”

You nod slowly. “I guess you’re right, it just sucks. I want to know who it is so bad, it’s keeping me up at night!”

Thankfully, the rest of that day is spent writing up reports and filing, nobody has called the team and demanded they get on a flight to wherever. These days arent common, but they’re possible, and Spencer couldnt be happier that one of them has arrived today. He cant help thinking luck might be on his side, or maybe Hotch has somehow scheduled this perfectly for him. Either way, he’s very grateful.

But the end of the day comes sooner than expected, and he finds himself packing up his stuff with shaking hands. You’re distracted, in the middle of a conversation with Rossi, thank goodness. Spencer darts out of the building, getting everything in place in exactly the amount of time he’d predicted he could do this in. 23 seconds. By the time he’s hidden himself, you’re just pushing the building doors open.

You approach your car, eyes immediately locking onto the envelope on your windshield. Now your hands are shaking just like his. You reach for it, opening it so slowly it’s painful for Spencer to watch. Once it’s open, you unfold the page in your hands and start to read.

(Y/N),

You captured my heart from the moment you first smiled at me. You introduced yourself with bubbliness that I was so sure wouldnt survive in this job, but you proved me so wrong. Every single day, you walk into work with the brightest smile on your face. You make it your mission to improve the lives of every person you meet, I dont even think you try, it comes naturally to you. Trying to resist falling for you was futile, and so instead, I revel in it. My feelings for you are not hidden, everybody else can see them. You wouldnt believe the amount of people we’ve met on cases who have pulled me aside and told me to just ask you out. You are the sunshine of the BAU, not the crown jewel, but the crown itself, because without you none of us would make it. And seeing you light up everyday this week because of a simple gesture like a rose, it brings me more joy and pride than anything else ever could. Though you arent aware that my heart is yours, you handle it with such care, and if my only way of returning that favour is to make you smile with roses, I’ll deliver them everyday, until my last breath.

I didnt want to come up with rhymes for Derek, David, JJ or Emily, and send you on an unnecessarily long goose chase, so I suppose all that’s left to say is...hello, it’s me, your secret admirer.

“A-Are you here?” You ask without turning around.

“Yes.” Spencer replies, and he notices your body beginning to tremble as you slowly turn to face him.

“Spencer.” You breathe, your hands immediately covering your mouth as though his name is new to your lips. You had never suspected it was him, but now you see it couldnt have been anyone else.

Spencer steps out of the shadows, a bouquet of a dozen red roses in his hands. He holds them out to you, and you slowly take them, before launching yourself at him. To avoid crushing the flowers, you hold them in one hand and keep that hand at his back as you hug him, crying into his shirt. Spencer wraps his arms around you in a state of shock, feeling his heart swell in his chest.

“Th-Thank you!” You sob, and Spencer shushes you quietly.

“You dont need to thank me, you deserve romantic gestures like this and so much more.” He coos.

You pull away from him to wipe your eyes with your free hand, and Spencer cant help noticing how adorable you look, smiling through your happy tears.

“You’re the sweetest person I’ve ever known, Spencie.” You tell him, and he beams at you.

“Thank you, (Y/N).”

Your eyes widen. “I have something for you!”

Spencer’s eyebrows furrow in confusion as you awkwardly fish through your bag with your free hand, until you retrieve a piece of paper of your own. You pass it to him, and he’s about to open it, but your phone beeps.

“You’ve got to be fucking kidding.” You groan in frustration, throwing your head back dramatically.

“What is it?” Spencer asks.

You shake your head and put your phone away. “I love Hotch, but Im about to disembowl him for this timing. Wheels up in 30, come on!” You grab Spencer’s arm and drag him back into the building.

As much as Aaron may have tried to avoid a case on Valentine’s Day, this one couldnt be avoided. It was one of those “this is so urgent I’ll brief you on the jet” cases. By the time the brief is over, the team all but collapse from exhaustion. The flight is a few hours, people can afford to have a nap. Spencer, though, is wide awake. You’re curled up in the seat beside him, the blanket you always bring on the jet is shielding the entirety of you, apart from your head, which is resting on Spencer’s shoulder as you sleep soundly. Not wasting another second, he takes your note from his pocket and unfolds it, his curiosity has been eating him alive for so long he feels like a skeleton.

I honestly dont even know where to begin with this. I have no idea who you are, but I hope. Because if it isnt who I hope it is, this cant go anywhere, I’ll have to let down anyone that isnt him. And it cant be him, can it? The impossible man, the genius with a heart of gold, the encyclopaedia of endlessly fascinating facts that I could listen to forever. I dont make a habit of putting people on pedestals, but him? How could I not? He’s an angel of a man. And as much as I dont think Im worthy of his affection, it would be an honour to be loved by him, and for that, I hope. I hope, because Spencer, if it isnt you, I wont know what to do. But hey, just in case it is, maybe I should keep this with me if you ever reveal yourself? Jeez, look at me, living on nothing but hopes. But for you? If hope’s all I’ve got, even that is a dream.

Spencer blinks away the tears in his eyes. Of all people, you only hoped for him. And the way you described him, you adore him in the same way he adores you. He looks down at your face, sleeping peacefully on his shoulder with a delicate smile. Without tearing his gaze from you, he folds the note back up and slides it in his pocket. Spencer smiles down at you, lifting his hand to ever so gently tuck some stray strands of hair behind your ear, before leaning down to place a kiss on your forehead.

“Thank you for letting me be your secret admirer.”

[terraliensvent]

Staff doesn't care about Terras anymore and I think they should hand over total ownership (Admins, mods and all) to people who actually care. I love Terras and don't want to see them die off, but it feels inevitable now.

Terras is over party ig!!!

honestly im tired of them playing hot potato with this project, it fails under any ownership its given and any passion that was once put in (arguably an incredibly small amount since its obvious this was a cashgrab from day 1) is completely wiped away

there are much better species and worlds to put your time and money into. what does terras offer?

a lazy staff team that is so focused on entirely separate projects that they cant even shit out a halloween event, and that gave so little of a fuck that they waited a full month after the birthday event was over to even raffle the designs, and that was seemingly held together by one staff member so much so that when that member left the team, the server had rule violations sitting for days at a time

a site that, despite having almost nothing added in the way of extensions, runs like shit because staff doesnt want to abide by recommended image sizes and overloaded the whole thing with enormously heavy images, to the point that now even after the images have been compressed oh so slightly, the site still runs like shit

a site that will never have any interesting changes or additions made (even the most simple) because staff is so incompetent with their own tools they fundamentally do not understand how lorekeeper works. this wouldnt be so much of an issue if they would hire someone experienced in lk (their site coder has said they have no idea how lk works and theyve never used it), or take on volunteers to add the most basic functionality, but they wont do that because they are again, so incompetent that they think a volunteer could just delete the whole site which is fundamentally impossible unless you give them your fucking admin login

no lore MINIMAL lore about, of all things, a stupid new subtype that nobody wanted. no publicly available lore about terra planet, society, anatomy, physiology, or even why these stupid things have fishbowls on their heads. if you want even a scrap of information, you have to scrounge through months upon months of messages in staff-answer, or play a stupid ass ARG

an abysmal design approval process. you will have your design denied for trait restrictions that are listed nowhere, and that staff let pass with their friends 2 days ago. if you ever try to bring up any terra on the ml as an example that they have approved the same design aspect before, you will ALWAYS be knocked dowm with “that design was approved before we updated the guides/it slipped through the cracks” even when the design isnt even a week old

no MYO slot sales, no fun opportunities for community interaction, fucking hell not even any events anymore because staff dont give enough of a fuck to slap something together for the month of october.

lazy adopts thrown together for a quick buck to the point they will have scribbly lineart, color spilling out, and unclear design aspects that they will shit out and sell to you for $90+.

a server that is so overloaded with toxic positivity that you will get dogpiled even for saying you dont like a certain video game.

just give up on terras at this point. its been a year and a half of this shit and it has never been at even a BASELINE standard of how a species should operate.

newly released species these days all think its acceptable to drop with just a concept and an empty lorekeeper and call it a day. i think everyone who participates in closed species needs to collectively come together and raise the standards that were set by the mother of all cashgrabs: chams. we need to stop enabling the species owners who give NOTHING to the project, the ones who release with no lore, shops, or trait sheets. i think we all should take our money to more fulfilling creators (in my experience, smaller species projects are typically so much more fleshed out than popular new ones hitting the market, but they often lack the publicity to flourish) and stop sinking money and so much time into people who dont put in any effort, and who dont WANT to put in any effort because they have no passion for the project outside of a paycheck.

[wulfums]

Pokemon au for that ask meme!

i prefer to interpret it as a PMD au than a trainer one so like

me and bestie taylor already discussed this w each other but PMD au where smiling friends is an exploration guild !!

allan doesnt usually go on exploration missions but whatwulf does. allan is an orthworm btw and whatwulf is a lycanroc (He is water terra type ) but i think allan Wishes whatwulf wouldnt because he gets worried abt him :(

i think whatwulf is on a rescue mission teamed up w pim one time and they faint and allan is like alright thats it. and grabs glep and charlie and is like we are saving them. and thats how they find out allan is overlevelled as hell and Way Too Strong. hes still not gonna go on any missions unless he absolutely has to though but ww is grateful for being saved yay

heres whatwulf n gristle's designs!! you can see bestie pazzypanda's designs for the canon characters on her twitter teehee or click on there i embedded the link

as for Gristle. i know i was mostly gonna do these for allanwulf but i do already have somth in specific in mind for him and his bfs. Every pmd game needs a fucked up and evil team. so like. Frowning Friends, obviously.

the thing is they're all extremely weak to ground types. gristle is a houndoom, gnarly is an ampharos, and grim is a gengar (does NOT have levitate). and i think thats very funny. they are public nuisances. one earthquake or even magnitude fucking annhiliates them but ironically despite being nihilists, they keep trying to succeed in Crime.

[lcpmon]

real ermengarde hours

thinking abt the fact she has never been on a proper pokemon journey ever. her first two pokemon were a klink and a voltorb she made friends with and they werent ever allowed to be brought home with her bc her family didnt deem them worthy enough. she met up with them and you couldnt catch them unless you threw a master ball at them bc they were already bonded to her.

but when she ran away at 12 she just absconded her home region and left for galar with her pokemon after finally stealing some pokeballs to keep them in. she couldnt get endorsed in galar (even if they did things differently during her youth) so she just focused on her studies and trained her pokemon on the side so they wouldnt be weak in case there were any obstacles in her way

present day her team looks like this but shes never fought a gym leader in a professional way in all her years

also popping williams "team" here he just has a bunch of low level kitties that he loves. he did try the unova gym challenge but just got wiped across the floor and focused on what he actually enjoyed. loves pokemon but more as pets than battle companions.

ermengardes sexual identity is another messy one. she wasnt comphet but her rship w william was definitely: "oh he loves me and i love him. the only logical thing to do is date him" when her love was not romantic. she loves that guy a lot and still does despite the mess their rship was bc thats her bestest friend

i def view and portray her as aroace but shes more willing to mess around with women than men. shes also soo touch repulsed and tends to turn hugs away but also has a bad habit of getting in peoples personal space like a hand on someones shoulder or hauling them in close with a "side hug".

also the kind of girl that likes women that want to strangle her. driving them up the wall is a fun pastime.

[gxldencity]

4, 7 & 24 for the 🔥🔥 asks!

4. what was the last straw that made you finally block that annoying person?

Tbh I don't have a last straw anymore. I use and abuse the block button liberally. If I see an annoying opinion, I block. Sometimes, I don't even finish reading the post because you usually can tell it's rancid from the first 2 lines.

I've blocked half a fandom at this point bc of the constant negativity. I simply don't care anymore. I'm here to have fun. If you take personal offense to that then that's your problem not mine.

7. what character did you begin to hate not because of canon but because how how the fandom acts about them?

Alngksgnw as you're said hate IS a strong word and I don't hate characters really unless there is a good reason for me to hate them.

So when I say I began to dislike Dorian Pavus after seeing how the fandom acted towards him, I don't hate him. I guess I do find him fascinating and relatable to an extent but I also don't think he's written perfectly as some people act like he is. Revisiting Dorian's quest as an adult with a fully developed brain and way more comfortable about my own queerness made me realize that I dislike how Dorian didn't really have agency whether to reconcile with his father or not. I know it's the point of The game to have a choice but Idk a bit more dialogue about the choice could've easily solved that problem for me.

I also have issues with Dorian's Indian coding lmao and have since felt like I was duped. It just feels like a cop-out? Like Gaider and team knew about the complaints people have about his comments wrt Asians in Thedas so they made him Asian—only mentioning it in a forum post or Twitter I think 🫠 so to this day ive seen people still surprised that he's Asian—without considering how to code him as Indian in the game.

Things like his clothing having some influences from the cultures in India or family structures and mannerisms. I mean it could be as simple as Indian coding the people of Quarinus so you don't just have this one Indian coded family in the entirety of Thedas. The Alexiuses could've also been Indian coded.

(An aside there's more layers to this like the unfortunate implications of coding a group of people who own slaves as poc but I could write a whole post about Dragon Age's attempts of trying to put Asians in this game)

Anyway, that's canon lol. Fandom makes this all worse. I could just point at the Orientalist depictions of Dorian in fanart and just end it here but nope it goes deeper. Somehow, Dorian attracted the worst kind of fandom. Like the Solas and Cullen stans maybe louder but I was there Gandalf. I was in the trenches. People were forming cliques around this one BNF and their friends. I was in the clique and it was all good until Tresspasser dropped.

You see this clique hated that Tresspasser ended with Dorian and the Inquisitor being in an LDR—because Dorian was off trying to fix a country—to the point where some of them acted like they broke up. Hello? Okay 1) That is such a poor reading on long distance relationships 2) Dorian...got a phone crystal for the Inquisitor, u know a tech that didn't exist in Thedas so they can stay in touch.

It also isn't enough that they didn't like it. Others have to Not like it as well. I remember talking to the BNF about my Inquisitor and Dorian, how they stayed in touch as Dorian was y'know trying to fix a country and the BNF told me that it was a depressing situation for my Inquisitor and Dorian...even though it isn't and they're perfectly happy.

(An side, not from this clique but I wouldnt be surprised if some of them also held this opinion but I saw some accusations from folks that Bioware is homophobic because Dorian and the Inquisitor are in an LDR. This is how batshit this fandom is).

Anyway, to keep it short, I was 19-20 when all of this happened. I probably said some stupid shit around that time but I should tell you these people were in their late 20s to early 30s. They were affected by a 19-20 year old with just a handful of followers saying stupid shit. They were so affected by the barely adult saying stupid shit that one of them stalked me, vagueposted about me and when I found out they were vagueposting about me, proceeded to gaslight me and told me I was the one stalking them. :)

Not only that, they also harassed one of my friends to not posting their fics ever again, harrassed a friend of a friend for trying to steal the BNF's spotlight 🙄. Come on some of you have fucking children.

I don't think I could look at Dorian in the same way which is a shame because for a time he was important to me but like God, it was rough.

I also have not forgotten nor forgave :) hence why I have the studio behind that chorus game or whatever it's called now blocked :) and would not be playing it. Do not care if David Gaider is the one writing it. I mean he kinda was the weakest link in that writing team imo (and I also hate his prose).

24. topic that brings up the most rancid discourse

Very cliche but anything to do with the mages and templars

[bridgyrose]

The recent Vol. 9 trailer and some rereads through your AUs have had me absolutely craving more Salem's Vessel... pls (if you don't have any interest in the concept anymore then no worries gjejfne)

Ruby smiled a bit as she took in a breath of fresh air as she stepped off the airship from Beacon. Even if it was Weiss’s idea to walk around, she had to admit that getting off campus and away from the other students felt nice. And to top it off, it was just a quiet day with her team. 

“Are you sure you can trust them out here?” Salem asked. 

Well, mostly quiet. Ruby’s smile started to fade as she slowed down her pace while Weiss didnt notice as she continued to ramble on about seeing the visiting students. “I never said I trust them, but that doesnt mean I’m not going to try to figure out what they want,” Ruby said in a hushed whisper. “Yang is my sister and I trust her to keep me safe. Blake… I’m still not sure about her but besides romance books, whatever she’s hiding doesnt seem to be dangerous yet. And Weiss… I genuinely want to get to know her and find out why she’s like this. I know she’s from Atlas but that doesnt explain anything.” 

“Seems like you’re learning.” 

“Learning or finally trying to figure out who my team is. You do have a point that I cant blindly trust everyone, but at the same time, I’d like to make friends with them.” 

“You really think you can be friends with a spoiled heiress?” 

“I’m not sure, but if she’s willing to try, then I can too.” 

“Ruby!” Yang called out. “You’re falling behind!” 

Ruby sighed and whispered to herself. “Please stay quiet today. I want one day without you popping into my head.” She quickly rushed back to the group with her semblance, leaving a trail of petals behind her as she took her spot next to Weiss once again. “Sorry about that.” 

“Please try to not fall too far behind,” Weiss said as she continued walking down the street, her eyes looking around for anyone who looked like students. “We’re here to bond and hopefully find out more about our competition for the Vytal Festival.” 

“Who said we were doing that?” Blake asked. 

“Why wouldnt you want to?” Weiss paused and looked at Blake with a curious eye. “If we win, we could be on the fast track to being huntresses! People will know who we are and what we can do!” 

“Maybe some of us dont actually want that.” 

Ruby rolled her eyes as she listened to Weiss and Blake argue pointlessly again like usual. Weiss seemed determined to get some sort of standing while at Beacon and Blake was practically her polar opposite: someone who seemed to want to stay in the shadows of the other students and be out of the way. And in a way, Ruby could relate to that. How much easier it was to sit back and let others take the limelight while she faded away as a normal girl. Instead, here she was leader of her team, two years younger than everyone else, and practically a prodigy after training with Qrow and her father. “Maybe we can find something else to do.” 

“Like what?” Weiss asked. “Dont you care about who we’ll face?” 

“A little, but not enough to argue about it. Besides, werent you the one who said that you wanted to try to get along with us?” 

Weiss frowned and huffed. “Fine, we’ll do something else.” 

Ruby relaxed a bit as she continued walking with her team through Vale. Though, it didnt take long for her to stop once more once she saw police tape covering the entrance to one of the dust shops in town. And once again, she found herself on edge as Weiss spoke, disdain in her voice.

“Great, another dust shop robbery. Probably the White Fang again.” 

“Maybe it wasnt the White Fang!” Blake practically yelled out. “Not everything has to be their fault.” 

“Who else could it be?” 

“Maybe that Torchwick guy Ruby ran into a couple months back,” Yang suggested. “He never was caught so its possible he’s starting back up again.” 

Weiss rolled her eyes. “Unless he’s specifically targeting SDC supplied dust shops-” 

“Considering the SDC is the biggest supplier, that’s not hard.” Blake sighed and started to walk off. “Can we drop it, please? If, and that’s a bit if, its the White Fang, then we can let the authorities handle it.” 

“Oh, like the way they handle everything else?” 

Ruby hesitated as she watched Blake’s bow twitch at the mention of the White Fang and the way her tone seemed to shift as she almost seemed defensive at the idea they were responsible.

“You noticed too,” Salem said calmly in Ruby’s head. “For all you know she could be part of them.” 

“I never thought that,” Ruby lied in a quiet whisper to herself. “Though, I guess it wouldnt surprise me if she had been. Or still is.” 

“Then you’ll need to watch her carefully. The Heiress to the SDC and a member of the White Fang on the same team. If you’re not careful, you’ll get stuck in whatever war they end up waging against each other.” 

Ruby sighed and started to walk after Blake as her mind raced. It was becoming more obvious that while Blake was hiding she was a faunus, she may have been wrong about what else was being hidden. “Then what exactly do you suggest?” 

“Find out what Blake is really hiding and why Weiss is really here. Gain their trust and use them to your goals. Everyone is a piece for you to use. Each has their different uses, but if you play them right, then you can make your own desires your reality.” 

“Like how you’re using me?” 

“"Using” is a strong word. I prefer… teaching.” 

“Let me handle this one on my own.” Ruby half listened to Blake and Weiss argue while Yang tried to keep them calm. “And if I cant get things to work, then I’ll do things your way.”

[mjammies]

Can someone come and collect Apsen (the Elite)

rereading the selection series havent read it since probably high school. i am currently reading the elite and here are my thoughts for a couple chapters. new developments as ive gotten older, 1) I hate america with every fiber in my being and 2) apparently im team maxon now. Things that havent changed, 1) grammar and spelling still suck and 2) too lazy to fix those issues previously mentioned. anywho here are my thoughts for the elite ch 11-13

Ch  11

Post rodding incident:

-marlee and carter are together and miss thing is still mad

-doesnt see how canning is merciful over dying 

-Oppression olympics!! Trying to tell the others they would be begging for death over rodding, girl stop

-”im sure ive experienced far worse than you” okayyy heres a cookie miss maam

-now you lunging at people cause they calling your friend names. Okayy i get it but i think this stuff is striking a cord in you. Like was that a personal attack. 

-not the nurses spreading gossippp. Lol not them ready for that girl to get jumped. As i said if it was celeste getting the beating miss thing wouldnt even bat an eye

-celeste out here putting glass in the gurlls shoes omgg

-not celeste out here hitting the help omgggg

-girlll stopp asking about marlee, she did what she did and that is the end of that. No body is moving, marlee is out living her life with her busted man.

-girllllll pick-me pick-me pick-me, you should know by now HEIS NOT LETTING YOU GO 

Like get it through your thick red skull that you could literally jump his father and he would still find a way to let you stay, like give it up unless you decide to go home you will literally be stuck in this palace forever so hang it up NEOW.

-out of all the people you dont trust and its maxon like girl stop

Ch12

-here come aspen, rolls eyes 

-a date?! Are you kidding me. Aspen kys pls, thank you 

- im ready for this castle to blow up 

-”we might get caught” I SURE HOPE SO

-”if you ever want to seek around the palace im the guy to do it with” OKAYYY BOTH OF YALL KYS THEN cause what 

-”i was still worried, but i needed to be comforted so badly” okay so your also a w****

-not aspen tryna sabotage. YOU CANNOT COMPETE WITH A PRINCE, HANG IT TF UP ASPEN

-yall thinking he gon do the ole bait and switch. Start beating on that girl as soon as the vows are read or something

-” i feel so stupid” YOU SHOULD 

-”i couldnt imagine being with anyone else” buttt…… dont you marry her maid so…..

-”im really sorry maxon turned out to be such a bad guy.” HUH! Whatthehellyouisyoutalmbout

When did we decide he was a bad guy, when did the council come to THAT decision 

-”maxons hold on me was slipping away” the hold of a PRINCE is slipping away.. Okay pack it  up ELECTRIC CHAIR for yous BOTH

-brooo they caught yall in a closet plz bffr

-loll they called miss girl a clown thats so funny 

-see now theyre both treasonous talm bout tried to release her during her canning, now youre in last place with the nation 

-”make sure shes worthy” WELL I CAN TELL YOU WHO ISNT! WITH A QUICKNESS TOO

Ch13

-“The king was expecting me to fail” you know what, if i was the king id want you to fail too lmao

-”I ran from the room” -1000000000 aura points, toughen up plzzzz

-”when aspen slid my door open that night” the way i would be standing there waiting on him with a gun cause have you lost your MINDDDD

-”you know who you are dont let anyone try to change you” broo nobody like America BUT YALL

-”all you know how to do is play the piano? Suddenly you’re supposed to know how to do clerical work” bruhhh do yall think sitting at a desk is going to kill you like PLZZZZ -broo what is he gonna do with these pennies

-first pennies now buttons mad face

-oh so it sacrifices what you want, is that it!!! It is cause he has nothing else to give????!!!?!?!?!?

-”Apsen’s generosity was harder to see because it wasnt as grand as Maxon’s, but the heart behind what he gave was so much bigger” SO….. youre telling me that if maxon gave you a STICK then it would mean more to you

[phantalgia]

9/2/24 - Just existential anxiety...

I can't really get into a relaxed state right now. Many of my thoughts are on existential things. I have this awareness of my own fears of the outside world. I’m afraid to meet people. I’m missing the people I did meet and lose. I’m just covered in this filth. Waiting for someone to swoop me off my feet. But as usual, it's not just anyone. It's very specific. And that's so limiting.

I think right now my mind feels like the world is closing in on me. Or maybe I’m getting smaller and smaller. I’m realizing I’m 25 and won’t be forever. When will things change? How will they? What am I waiting for?

I said I was waiting for someone. And I think that's the point. I’m not looking, as I've mentioned in other posts. I’m waiting. I’m more idle than active. Still doesn't give me answers as to why I’m so idle.

And I’m saying this as if I removed the physical stuff that plagues me. I’m afraid of judgement, I’m stuck in the past, I’m using past people as a model for a made up person I have in my mind. It's so limiting. But...maybe there's a positive side? At least it vaugely filters out people I don’t want to associate with. But I have to meet people in order to be able to filter to begin with.

This still doesnt answer anything. I want to go out. But I’m scared. I want to find that type of person I’m looking for.

Right now it's like nothing matters to me except being a part of someone's life. And not just someone too but a group of people.

But I have that to an extent? Maybe it's not the impact I’m looking for. We're not on the same level. Not seeing eye to eye?

Where are you...I know you’re out there. Whether you’re a person or a number of people.

Maybe it's not a good idea to be looking for people to swoop me off my feet. Maybe I really do gotta "self love" and nonsense.

But for crying out loud I cant do this life shit on my own! Can we like just get together and have the growth mindset in mind and try to find self love in each other? Please? That's what I want!

Like a team member! A literal partner, I scratch your back you scratch mine! Shit...I could have had that. It was right in front of me.

There is one person. But. I’m nervous. I really don’t want to make any expectations because theyre looking for something specific and I’m not really. I mean I am, just want to build it first. And then take a step back and see. So this seems dumb because there's a person right there!

Yeah but I don’t want to make it seem like I’m using them. That would not be good. Especially since they told me they've been used before. It just wouldnt be right. None of it would. So why should I do that? It's not what I want to do. It needs to actually be mutual. Not one sided.

So I’m afraid of that. Even if theyre not the ideal person I made up in my head. Theyre a good person. But the one sidedness could make things strange.

So then what? Back to waiting? I guess so. Waiting, getting older, more isolated, and never moving forward. It cant be like this forever. No way. Thats just not possible.

I cant force anything to change. But maybe I can at least accept myself right now and how I feel?

Ok...I feel alone, I feel weak, I feel like a coward, I’m failing people. I’m feeling like I’m never breaking out of this hell and the only way out is for some life altering event to occur. But that may be a while. I might just really be alone. All those friends and "ideal" people...gone.

You screw around you find out. And oh boy am I finding out. I’m suffering without the people I cared about. The people that vented to me. The people that came to me when they needed emotional support. Cried to me. I need those people now. And I need a promise to see them. And to know what it feels like to touch another human and not feel uncomfortable with it.

Hopefully now I can rest easier knowing I emptied my head. Unless I’m still up and got more in there...

I just realized. I don’t know what i want and it makes me not do anything.

Come to think of it, I just sort of realized that a blog diary could be limiting as it could prevent me from being honest with myself. I don’t know.