#so u wont see them banging here

[callmegaith]

Is making jackalopes a euphuism for sex?

I knew someone would say that

no.

LIKE THEY HAVENT EVEN KISSED IN MY DRAMATIC RL UNIVERSE YET THEYRE NOT GONNA JUMP INTO BANGING! I LIKE MY SLOW BURNS OKAY?!

[mushyposts]

WOAH! THE CREW???? THE CREW FROM HIT FANFICTION NO THING DEFINES A MAN LIKE LOVE??? WOAH WOAH WOAH??? Anyway yes omg its them!!! This took me so long and im so tired but look at my ANGELS!

UM! Friendly reminder that I myself am not Inuit/Indigenous! I did research + had an Indigenous person helping me w the tattoos, but if theres anything wrong/disrespectful pls do let me know and I will fix it. All the tattoos r on a seperate layer so it'll be an easy fix and one i am more then happy to do. A few of the designs changed between this and my written description, so... Oops?? Especially Morqa. I got carried away ok.... ANYWAY I have some little notes abt their designs here and there so! Kaiqa: He used to have shorter bangs around his face but they annoyed him so he tried to let them grow out but that annoyed him so he would cut them again and then try to let them grow out and now he just has perpetual baby hairs that wont get any longer. Mikla: UM. Not much to say here. Isnt he pretty tho?? Buteq: SOMEHOW ENDED UP THE MOST MAJESTIC MAN EVER. HELLO?? The two beads on the right are for his nieces and the one on the left is for his sister! Neter: One time he got super cocky abt being 7 years older then Nitya which meant he was a better fighter and so Nitya was like "yeah?? ok bet." and then punched him and broke his nose and was like "hm where are those warrior reflexes?" so now Neter has a permanently bent nose. Sorqai: He got the scar thats through his beard in the same raid that cause Nitya and Konait (Kaiqas older brother) to die. Nitya died trying to get Konait and some other kids out of the mess, and Sorqai got injured trying to get to them to help. He's mostly numb on that side of his face due to nerve damage ! Causes him to lisp a bit, especially w the chipped tooth (which he got from tripping) Natai: He wears both his own and Nitya's necklaces their parents made them, and intends to only take of Nitya's and let it go into the ocean where he was buried when the war is over. His own way of keeping Nitya involved in the war effort, something that was really important to him. Kutai: Again, no real notes here but isnt he pretttyyy..... Kovak: Honestly, very likely one of my favourite character designs I've ever made. Im kind of obsessed with him. He doesnt wear his necklace from his parents because he wasnt on good terms with them at all while they were alive. He took it off before they died, and hasnt been able to bring himself to put it back on. he intends to give it to his kid when he gets back. Mori: UM! I dont have a lot of notes here. Mori has two kids ! Hence the three tattoos under their chin, I saw an inuit creator/source say that sometimes people will add lines as they have kids and I thought that was really lovely so yes!! Again im just. I think hes so pretty. Luqait: Im so sorry king I did u dirty posting this after that one chapter. Each one of the beads he wears is dedicated to someone he knew in the tribe who died, theres more not visible on the other side of the braids. I can say for 100% certainty theres one for Kya and Nitya. Saila: Saila was actually a design i struggled a lot with, but I think I got them to a point im happy with!!! They're a good amount intense, androgynous and also have that amber flash in their eyes. The amber comes from having Fire Nation somewhere in their ancestry, something I dont think will really come up in the fic, but a detail I think is good to know! Morqa: I changed Morqa's design the most, especially his hair! But I think he's ended up being a design I am most proud of. The piercings especially!! Eventually u will run out of space (that we can see ig??) king but today is not that day godbless.

OKAY! THERE WE GO... I HOPE EVERYONE LIKES THEM UM PLS BE NICE AND DONT REPOST AND IDK JUST.... I HOPE U LIKE THEM AS MUCH AS I DO i know oc's in fics arent always peoples favourites but the reception of these guys has been like. Beyond mindblowing. Im so fucking excvited and happy everytime people in my comments talk about how much they love the characters i've created. Like.... The fact that people enjoy the OC's and not just for what the give to Zuko, but for what they give to each other and their own individual stories is so incredible to me. I hope u guys like this and I hope it helps u visualise them better!! : D

[vanyafresita]

my si-5 designs ! maybe i draw later the hephaestus crew too...

anyways after making this to have as a reference for whenever i want to draw them, imma yap here under the read more all i want about my headcanons for them (cracks fingers)

alana maxwell is very saeyoung from mystic messenger coded, thats why i gave her the dr pepper can lmfao

also she is literally aroace i wont take criticism for this one

to me she's transfem too, but i only like to think about that if jacobi is ALSO trans bcs i love me a t4t queerplatonic relationship

she forgets to eat often so shes a lil underweight- but its okay kepler and jacobi will make sure she doesnt actually faint from hunger

she is also taller than jacobi i tihnk she would b like... 176cm or so... jacobi is like 170cm and kepler is around 185cm

she also doesnt have a lot of scars on her body since she gets protected when working on a laptop by the other two during ops (or she is working as a sniper, and thus she isnt a direct target most of the time)

unlike kepler who prefers hand to hand combat, or jacobi who joins him and also messes around with chemicals and explosives often

absolutely random thought, but alana is canadian to me ! warren is american and jacobi is chilean (i am latino, me reservo el derecho de latinificar a un personaje por cada obsesión que tenga xoxoxo)

jacobi wears a hearing aid on his right ear too btw !! an accident with a small explosive left the right side of his face and his ear damaged !

jacobi paints his nails too (he actually doesnt, its alana the one who does, jacobi has a terrible case of shaky hands)

both maxwell and jacobi wear glasses, but while maxwell uses them 24/7, jacobi just.... does not care. they keep getting broken one way or another so he doesnt bother... he can see from up close, so who cares ! (at some point tho, he get convinced to get eye surgery, so he obliges)

okay switching to kepler's sexuality... he is aro and very horny for jacobi we all know this like. its very obvious i fear.... like... yeah

jacobi is bi... i feel like he had a crush on alana at first, but the closer he got to her something changed and, believe me, he does love her A LOT (probably more than kepler) just not in a romantic way !! ergo: qpps

and because jacobi is a masochistic idiot of course he fell in love with his evil boss CMON MAN GET BETTER TASTE <- alana to daniel

kepler probably doesnt date tho, most likely he doesnt feel like it would mean much making official any type of relationship they have (aka 'we fuck sometimes, i try my best to be considerate of ur feelings, i dont feel jealousy seeing you being close with maxwell, and i wanna keep her close too'), while jacobi is like. biting his nails trying not to die from love but he knows dating ur boss is not a good path to go down (its already bad they are fucking behind everybody's back- except alana, he cannot keep secrets from alana)

i think the relationship these three have (at least in my head idc about yall's opinions LMAO) is absolutely insane and it makes me act like a rabid dog, i lose all coherence trying to explain how they make me feel

they are all in love with each other, just in very wildly different ways

i love thinking about jacobi and maxwell's closeness, how they care for each other, the vulnerability, the love, the devotion, how open they are and how little they care about how others perceive them

i love thinking about kepler actually trying to make an effort to be romantic, getting it wrong often, and then having to deal with jacobi being passive aggressive; WARREN JUST TELL HIM U DONT GET ROMANTIC LOVE, YOU JUST LIKE HIM AND WANNA MAYBE DATE AND DEFINITELY BANG, DONT BE STUPID

i love...... whatever the fuck kepler and maxwell have going on... not romantic or platonic, but a secret third thing.... the mutual respect and admiration, the overprotection feeling.....

jacobi is sooooo glad his two most favourite people in the world get on well, he'd die if kepler and maxwell weren't on good terms... but thank god all three of them are fucked up and obsessed, and insane and love each other

they all love to banter, they would kill each other, they would kill for the others, they cant stand to be near, they would die if they are apart, they need to be so close together you cant tell apart where one ends and the other stars

as a side note of my designs, i wanna comment how confused i was when i finished the podcast, checked the art tag, and saw most people draw warren kepler as a white man, like i got jumpscared ngl IM SORRYYYY

listen when i heard his honey voice... that cadence... he gave me this very clear image of distinguished bald tall black man, the image went straight to my brain and i have not been able to imagine him otherwise

and i keep seeing him drawn white and blond and with blue eyes and i feel SO SCARED like i have nothing against those designs but its so confusing because to me he is that type of attractive motherfucker that charms everybody around with a smile, that make people trust him blindly from how confident his posture and personality is... and to me (poc person) a white blond blue-eyed man does NOT inspire me trust lmfaoooo so i guess i may be biased ?

anyways i know warren kepler is a divisive character !!! he is so fucked up and complex and hot HE IS MY EVERYTHING im gonna throw up /pos im so obsessed with him... you evil bastard... youre my babygirl, ure so important to me, your war crimes and horrible morality is charming to me <3 i dont wanna fix him i wanna observe how he makes other people WORST (thinks 24/7 about the implication that he disciplines jacobi and maxwell in very creative ways)

okay anyways IM DONEEEE SORRY THIS GOT SO LONG BUT I DONT CARE ITS MY BLOG AND MY HEADCANONS AND ITS ALL UNDER A READ MORE SO I CAN YAP TO THE NOTHINGNESS AS MUCH AS I WANT OK BYEEE

[borathae]

Chapter 16

OH MY GOD WE ARE NOT DEAD YAY HOBI

WHERES KOOK???? HIS BACK????

okay this was like the calmest reaction to me being a vampire I have ever seen. hobari, my love, tae already told her thats why she is chill

I once had a girl literally run away from me screeching prayers.” xd HAHA imagine someone pulling out the cross at him and saying THE POWER CHRIST COMPELS YOU and him just blinking

hobi baby, ik your are excited, but its quite the wrong time and person to test your new skills

“No, I’m not like Jungkook. I don’t go crazy at the smell or taste of blood. Especially not when yours tastes like literal ass right now, wow thanks ig

holy shit no baby kook, im gonna fucking cry DONT PUNISH YOURSELF YOU SAVED US BOTH FUCK IM ALL TEARY EYES

I’m just waiting for the day when vampire hunters break through the front door and shoot you guys.” im imagining them coming in fbi style FBI OPEN UP WE KNOW ITS SANGUIS hobi's cute dumbass - how did u know seokjin- you just proved it

this is why she isnt scared of you both 😭😭😭 reminds me of that tiktok asking whose house will you rob and everyone straight up said hobi in the comments 💀

imagine someone seeing their bodies in front of the house also was it tae or yoongi or someone else??

ok hobi was 26 in 1982, so born in 1956 and is 68 so its 2024 hmm SO KOOK IS 94 WTF they are not even dilf, they are gilf 😭😭😭 wait in that case whats tae 😭 hold on jimin mentioned yoongi being older, is that in older than 800 years or turned at an older age?

I was turned in 1875 by some random prostitute”, bitch pls 😭😭😭 he doesnt have a sob story nor a heroic one

wait something doesnt add up jin is 217, so if its 2024, he should be born in 1807, but he was 27 in 1875

“Good that you ask because listen this is such a story”, ..“Oh god here we go again stop being a jealous bean just cuz u got turned by a hoe 😭😭

“Yeah, I know exactly what you mean. With that massive schlong that I carry around” you say sarcastically. you sure about that? was that foreshadow to the oneshot lol

“She bit my neck!” “And she bit my dick!” one got their throat ripped out and other ones dick. great just great. i just know, no vampire has a story like this, i mean sure neck being bitten but from a prostitute?? and dick being bitten hobi im sorry but thats a tragic comedy

A bang then a clash. bro this scared me so bad only to see its “Stupid raccoon don’t run away, come on let me spank your rubbish stealing buttocks!”

whats calling her?? where is she going?? who is down there calling? 2seokook wont have something suspicious down there right?

daisies and fresh sheets? is that jungkook? why is he down there? wtf HOW DID THE DARK CORRIDOR TURN BRIGHT???

damn how hard did he hurt himself this is so heartbreaking let me get my blanket 😭

As long as I’m paralysed I’m no danger to you NO STOP whos cutting onions

OMG SHE KISSED HIS CHEEK IM BLUSHING LIKE IM THE ONE WHO GOT KISSED AAAH

WHERES KOOK???? HIS BACK????

buckle in, that's where the angst begins 😭

okay this was like the calmest reaction to me being a vampire I have ever seen. hobari, my love, tae already told her thats why she is chill

Hobari gosh :( I miss them all together </3

I once had a girl literally run away from me screeching prayers.” xd HAHA imagine someone pulling out the cross at him and saying THE POWER CHRIST COMPELS YOU and him just blinking

JJADSFJ tbfh it's so valid though JFADJSJF

hobi baby, ik your are excited, but its quite the wrong time and person to test your new skills

FADSHJFJ HE IS SO CHAOTIC BAHAHHAH

“No, I’m not like Jungkook. I don’t go crazy at the smell or taste of blood. Especially not when yours tastes like literal ass right now, wow thanks ig

hhiihih he is so good in flirting hhiihih

holy shit no baby kook, im gonna fucking cry DONT PUNISH YOURSELF YOU SAVED US BOTH FUCK IM ALL TEARY EYES

I'M CRYING IN THE CLUB

imagine someone seeing their bodies in front of the house also was it tae or yoongi or someone else??

WHOOO KNOWWSSS not me (i know)

ok hobi was 26 in 1982, so born in 1956 and is 68 so its 2024 hmm SO KOOK IS 94 WTF they are not even dilf, they are gilf 😭😭😭 wait in that case whats tae 😭 hold on jimin mentioned yoongi being older, is that in older than 800 years or turned at an older age?

OKAY BEAR IN MIND!!!! I wrote this story in 2020 so it takes place in 2020. You have to subtract 4 years of their age during Sanguis Alpha. Also as far as your Yoongi question is concerned, we do not know yet what exactly he meant 👀

I was turned in 1875 by some random prostitute”, bitch pls 😭😭😭 he doesnt have a sob story nor a heroic one

fjajdfadjs he is so pathetic jfdajsf

wait something doesnt add up jin is 217, so if its 2024, he should be born in 1807, but he was 27 in 1875

Nooo it takes place in 2020 queen <3 no wait. WAIT my bisexual ass did the maths wrong HELP!!!! thanks for pointing it out I need to change the dates jfdjsjf

“Good that you ask because listen this is such a story”, ..“Oh god here we go again stop being a jealous bean just cuz u got turned by a hoe 😭😭

oh sweet summer child if only you knew jfdjsf

“Yeah, I know exactly what you mean. With that massive schlong that I carry around” you say sarcastically. you sure about that? was that foreshadow to the oneshot lol

BESTIE THE DOTS ARE CONNECTING FJDSJF

“She bit my neck!” “And she bit my dick!” one got their throat ripped out and other ones dick. great just great. i just know, no vampire has a story like this, i mean sure neck being bitten but from a prostitute?? and dick being bitten hobi im sorry but thats a tragic comedy

aahhaha they're so chaotic I love them fjadjf

whats calling her?? where is she going?? who is down there calling? 2seokook wont have something suspicious down there right?

the suspicionn

daisies and fresh sheets? is that jungkook? why is he down there? wtf HOW DID THE DARK CORRIDOR TURN BRIGHT???

THE SUSPICION

damn how hard did he hurt himself this is so heartbreaking let me get my blanket 😭

i'm crying so hard 😭

As long as I’m paralysed I’m no danger to you NO STOP whos cutting onions

LIKE PLEASE 😭😭😭

OMG SHE KISSED HIS CHEEK IM BLUSHING LIKE IM THE ONE WHO GOT KISSED AAAH

THEY'RE SO CUTUUTUTEEEE

[firethatgrewsolow]

Curious question I hope you or someone can help with: before the Starship, how did the boys get from show to show? Especially like multi city gigs in the same state. I’ve never heard anyone mention anything. On a fun note, I’m imaging a Tiny Dancer Almost Famous scene but it’s Elvis 😂

Ahh, that does sound fun! I love that scene, and TD is one of my favorite songs. 💕 As to your question, I’ve pondered that a time or two. Which is to say I was pretty much obsessed with figuring out what they did when I was writing M&R. From what I’ve gathered, and I could easily be wrong, they had essentially three tiers of travel in the states. Europe was a bit different, and I’ll explain that in a sec.

In the early, early days, it looks like they were ferried about via station wagon, which quickly morphed into commercial flights and limos, as their success was basically immediate. There are some hilarious stories about snow storms and ruffled hair from those days - just google it if you don’t know them already. So funny. They continued w the commercial flights until they procured the Falcon jet. Not sure exactly when that was, but I know they had it by the summer of 71. My guess is sometime during 1970. Here’s Peter Grant chatting about it:

“Before that we had a nine-seater Falcon jet, which was a tremendous plane. We used to fly to every gig, into the limo, police escort, do the gig, do the encore and then – no changing, bang! – to the plane. I mean, it's wonderful isn't it, having your own plane?

“But they had to sit opposite each other all the time. And of course, there were rows, but they never lasted more than two or three hours (two or three hours ha!) a night. Somebody might get chinned by one of the others, having punch-ups between themselves. I mean, Bonzo and Robert were famous for that.

“The first time in Japan, in 1970 (it was actually 71) Robert went on with a split lip for the encore every time. And this was an argument over something they did in the [pre-Zeppelin band] Band Of Joy – Robert wouldn't pay Bonzo £37 for petrol or something.

“The thing is, in all seriousness, on that small plane you were too in that 'cocoon'. And then the 'Starship' came along. Which was only $14,000 more, because they [Boeing] wanted the publicity and that kind of thing. And we thought, well why not? We'll have a 720.”

They kept using the Falcon until half way through the 73 tour, at which time they scored the Starship. So, essentially, they scrubbed around for the first few months, then rapidly ascended to planes and limos. There’s talk of some school bus thing they used in the very beginning, but I can’t find anything concrete. In case you were wondering, the crew carted equipment around in U-haul type vehicles, staying in like mid-level budget motels, eventually sometimes flying commercial w the gear in the hold. They might also have gotten a bus at some point, I’m not sure. Im terribly uninformed about that.

In Europe, as the landscape and logistics are quite different than in the USA, they flew and took trains, sometimes personally driving to gigs. There’s a story about Robert’s car breaking down on the way to a gig in January 73, requiring he (and Bonzo?) hitchhike! to the show. I can only assume he was compelled to drive bc of a need for convenience / autonomy and not to save a buck lol! Some people theorize that he caught a cold doing this and sang anyway (as he was wont to do) - and that this was the genesis of his vocal struggles. I’d say smoking and opening with IS sans warmup a million times in a row might have had something to do with it, too. 😉

Well, that’s my Ted talk on Zeppelin transport logistics. 😁 Hope it wasn’t too boring. I really love delving into this stuff so thanks for the question! 💖 I’ll probably dig around a little deeper and see what I can find. And if anyone would like to add anything, please do!!

[athailandsquid]

A Thailand Squid - next boyfriend better behave + @genesis @unknownboyfriend

blow my bangs out the view, serious

eye locking suspension, connect with me,

you better behave, behavior is cadence,

your behavior determines your survival, behave,

curl my toes and ball my fists furious, analyzed,

better watch your move boyfriend,

d o n t f u c k u p ,

your every step makes the differences, good boy,

boyfriend better behave, yandere syndrome,

i'd kill you, stab you if you betray,

better not slut, sluts go to those graves, punished,

the next boyfriend better behave,

outstanding behavior,

you better not leave me, abandonment issues,

better not leave my side, stay next to me now,

feel on my body, rape my needs, pleasure me,

fuck me to sleep, dont clean up after, your scent,

condoms laid out on our floor, happy balloons,

drain you empty, your member throbbing, more,

your seed, crawling inside me, feeling like a woman,

sticky sticky sticky messes, happy fuck buddy,

blade against your spinal cord, sharp while deadly,

dont make me fucking end you, paralyzed meat,

make a sad story a happy one, dont leave,

i love you so, oh i do really love you,

pull those fucking pants down, belt off,

show me your hard, show me your cock,

stay hard, oh baby stay hard, all night,

keep that flesh rock solid for me,

throb mother fucker, throb and pulse it,

keep going, let me see your viens,

throbbing for me, shouting viens,

precum thick member heavy criminal,

blow the load, facial, neck gripping, throat fucking,

skull fucking, body rocking me, how dare you?,

im swallowing your delivery, salty pollution,

better behave if you want to see tommorow, hm?

keep my boyfriend in checking, obedient,

school dress and black japanese low top shoes,

im his yandere whore, not average girl, never,

grab these hips, sway them for you,

side to side,

left right,

grip my dough,

kneed through me,

caked, buttered up, white,

the next boyfriend better behave, behavioral dog,

correctional officer of love,

nose flared, eyes halfway shut, ready for murder,

wont think twice if you try walking out, murder,

your scared of the doom, doomsday girl,

systematic control, control me,

ride you like an animal, flesh hitting flesh,

my tightness choking your hard, pulse, pulse,

wanting to feel your heartbeat through your wood,

pump your pulse, dont stop, fuck me, dont nut!

dont release your milk yet lover, please dont cum,

your stick, manly stick leaking from my entrance,

yandere dreams and nightmares last forever,

your not even present, i dont know who you are yet,

once you fuck me, bonded like glue, your glue,

hit the spot accurate, make me obsessed,

scream your name,

make me crave your dick, your attention,

heartbreaks dont exists here, no escape,

talk to me like your wifey, pound me to sleep,

pound, pound, pounding,

over and over and over and over and over again,

scream your name,

tell me, are you going to fuck me and stay,

non stop sex until your hard is spent, and mine,

grab my neck, slam into me, rock me, harder!,

throw a knife, stab a liar,

rejoice, fathom the truth, your my boyfriend,

your dick loves my hole, craving my entrance,

looking back at your demeanor, give it to me,

make this room smell like us, our sex,

dont lie to me,

ill cut your tongue off,

keep your promises.

last shawty youll lie too.

slamming down, sweat splashing,

toes curled, im so pretty, so smart,

dont cheat or ill kill,

"be careful with saying i love you to me, ill get attached and than ill have to have sex with you all day and night..." - genesis

[wingkink]

-> thoughts post for m9 oneshot because i dont want ot make 85 indivcidial posts that get half a note each

puts up my sign that says "it has been [0] days since matt last used the wrong pronouns for his own nb npc"

sam is always doing some shit (derogatory this time)

also. sam not knowing hold old luc is has the same energy as matt not knowing how old vex and percy's kids are. lmao

also this is fucked like do NOT take the CHILD into the battle with you . we learned nothing from "SHE HAS SIX HITPOINTS"

where is essek. bangs my fists on the floor

actually forget him where is astrid. ASTRID MENTION !!!! FOR MY LIFE!!!!

blumentrio mention doesnt count altho appreciated^

not relevant but i think she should be evil. i think too many people want her to have a redemption arc or have her as like the good person (tm) on the assembly who is like a thorn in their side bceause theyre evil and she's not. no. she should be evil as well. and hot

SHE SHOULD HAVE BEEN ALLOWED TO KLILL HIM SHE WAS RIGHT SHE WAS RIGHT SHE SHOULD HAVE BEEN ALLOWED!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! HELLOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

i spent the whole first 10 mins of this stream thinking this guy was so annoying and now he's a guest player. was this show designed by someone who hates me personally or

"what sort of creche is this" and then blank looks from the cast is so funny. universal non american experience

hey i just had a coffee so this is going to get progressively more manic

ESSEK MENTION 🤙🤙🤙🤙🤙🤙🤙🤙🤙🤙🤙🤙🤙🤙

"perhaps we were too easy on him" "well we'll have to kill him this time" YOU THINK/.??? YOU FUCKING THINK??????? you know who knew that? ASTRID KNEW THAT

anyway shut the fuck up . get essek

this aggy guy ius so annoying like you will never be Spurt

i accidentally posted this help anyway contuining

LMAOOOOOOOOOOOOO ok sorry that's kinda funny. like chris perkins did it better but that's sitll pretty good

ARE U GOING TO ok well they cant call essek. sending is broken. shit. well they can mind meld with essek or something idk

i want him so bad <- what who said that

using wish to cast simulacrum never done before in cr history (real) anyway is anyone thinking what im thinking? anyway

HOW DO U HAVE THE ENERGY TO CAST TELEPORT (to the grove) TELEPORT (to the nein heroez) THE TOWER MIND BLANK AND WISH. U DONT.

screaming wailing and banging my fists on the table because i want to see my wizards

^^ wait. sorry. the simulacrum could have cast mind blank. im sorry for the caleb slander wont happen again

if astrid isnt here im going to kill myusefl

idk what's gonna happen when tyey go in but i know it's gonna be less cool than what im imagining but im just remembering liam saying that he once thought the two bodies he'd take back to replace his parents would be astrid and wulf . do you guys ever think about that? i do

WHER ETHE FUCK ESSEK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! IM GAY

im shaking physically btw i think the autism ghost is tyring to escape. my body

NAW COZ WHY DOES LEOFRIC SOUNDS LIKE WULF i know it's bc matt is probably just doing "zemnian man voice" buyt come ONNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN

insane that they would be in blumenthal in the house that the drei burnt WITH ikithon rehashing that last battle of campaign 3 and wulf and astrid ARENT FUCLING THERE. kills you kills you kills yo

im now picturing the debrief where caleb has to sit down and explain this to astrid tomorrow. i think she's gonna kill him

(wheres essek)

theres only 50 minutes left in the episode like i feel like this has barely started energy. hello

anyway astrid is so so gonna kill them like this cunt is killing people and you know how many people he wouldve killed if astrid had gutted him 7 years ago? 0 <3

god using her 9th level to summon artagan is so erotic. we stan

aww i miss the twins man

10 minuites to go.

insane pacing (derogatory). sub optimal number of wizards. not worth the time commitment. 0/10 do not recommend. goodnight

[venusdear]

YEAH BUT I SHOW RESPECT TO MY PROJECTS BC I WORKED ON THEM LMFAOOOO HE JUST WENT LIKE AIGHT IM GONNA KILL THIS KID

yeah i looked it up, and then i got sent down a wikipedia rabbit hole lol

so basically dongwoon announced that he was getting married and then some "fans" started HATING on him, which is even worse bc highlight stans's average age is like idk 25. U PEOPLE ARE TOO FUCKING OLD TO BE ACTING LIKE THIS. and then he had to GO ON IG LIVE and APOLOGIZE TO THEM FOR GETTING MARRIED. he looked so fucking sad :( he's too good for this world, if i were him i woulda been like "sending me hate wont make ur parents love u" and then stuck both my middle fingers up lmao. heres a picture of dongwoon btw:

his fiance is lucky af bc daaaaaaaaaaaamn imagine getting to see that pretty face every fucking day. FOR FREE.

LITERALLY LMFAO HE SHOULD. i made a few friends on twitter bc of my screaming and crying over highlight all day lolololol.

also this picture

is my first time seeing gikwang with his whole ass forehead out and its so weird. a picture of lisa from blackpink w/o bangs was on my twitter feed and i was like who tf are u and what did u do with lisa! so its kinda the same vibe lol.

also i love how he has one eye bigger than the other lol. also THE EARRINGS. I NEED.

currently making a lyrics video of how would your co-ed group sing troublemaker by to1. it just looks like this:

my ass putting kyungho (2nd from right) in there when hes already in to1 lmfao.

ive been looping in bloom by zb1 FOR 2 DAYS MY GOD HELP ME. why do i feel like gikwang and dongwoons voices would fit it so well (runs away)

my ass is imagining gikwang in EVERYTHING i read and idk if thats a blessing or curse.

LMAOOO "i'm gonna go kill my kid real quick"

WHATTT YOU ARE TOO OLD FOR THAT 25 AVERAGE??? that's so weird. AND DELUSIONAL DONGWOON DESERVES HAPPINESS!!! COME ON GUYS

wake up, look at dongwoon, wake up look at dongwoon

HIS FOREHEAD LMAOOO lisa and her bangs

ZB1 DEBUT SONG IS SOOOOOO GOOD

[ziggy-starman]

La Squadra constipation comfort. my ibs is making it hard to shite :///

I know this was satire but istg just seeing this gave me fun ideas for hcs, so here they are!

La squadra with a s/o who is constipated

♤-----------------------------------------------------------♤

Risotto Nero

Risotto really has no problem shitting so he doesn't understand your struggles.

He somehow makes it really awkward if you call him to help(idk how) like he comes over assuming you ran out of toilet paper but hes met with a "ris..i cant shit" from you.

If you're a shy pooper then hes probably just concerned on why you're taking so long. He'd go to the door and knock..oh boy what a mistake. Now you have to start the whole process of trying to shit comfortably again. You say some "Go away im shitting!" And he complies.

He tries to bring you a prune yogurt drink *as* you shit. Its not gonna help now tf

Prosciutto

This man istg. If you complain to him whilst *in* the bathroom and shitting he will nag to you and lecture you about your diet.

"This is why you eat your vegibles,cara! Next time you dont want those green beans dont come crying to me that you cant shit!"

If you're lactose intolerant its gonna be worse.

"Why would you eat from the cheese platter anyway?! Tesora,you need to stop doing this to yourself! It just hurts you!"

Hed go on and on and you're not paying attention to a damn word he spewed out. You're just trying to push the fucking log of a shit out your ass.

Pesci <3

Tbh this man isnt much of a help. But he tries!

He wouldnt know what to do he'd offer random things that make you happy but none of them can help you push out a fucking child sized dump.

If you start moaning and complaining while hes outside the door it'll just worry him more.

"Uuh- uhm oh! Do you want some music,amore? I know that makes you happ- AHH ARE YOU OKAY!?!" And you reply with a choked out "no.."

He'd sit with you till youre completely done. Or he wont if it makes it harder for you. He just wants you to shit comfortably. (10/10 bf fr)

Melone

Melone kinda got excited when he heard you calling him to the bathroom (if u do) he thought you'd want to take a bath with him and maybe bang who knows

Only to be met with you struggling to shit. He'd be disappointed but still try and come in to the toxic waste room. He just want to see you with your pants off.

He'd wanna come in more if you're a naked shitter. He uses excuses like "babe...you dont want me to come in? I can hold your hand"

Even if ur a shy pooper hed forget and stick around till you're done. Really he just sits around the door talks to you about random stuff and you'll never hear the end of "are you done yet?"

Whenever he says something his face will always be pressed against the door. So..good luck?

Ghiaccio

Ghia would be confused on why tf you yell for him but he goes to check either way. Like ris he expects that you ran out of toilet paper.....You cant shit.

"....what the fuck do you expect me to do about that?..DO YOU WANT ME TO FUCKING PULL THE SHIT OUT OF YA!?"

Hed stomp down the hall way mumbling out complaints, leaving you alone to shit.

No he wont hold your hand or take a shit in the double toilet with you :(( its "gross" to him..what a looser

He doesnt wanna experience the togetherness of smelling each others farts while shidding here with you...

Illuso

So you call him over.....now what? He comes to you but he has no idea what to do.

Hes like..."okay you cant shit...wtf do you want me to do about that? I cant just use magic,babe." He'll be very blunt and make it obvious that he doesnt wanna talk to you while you're popping a squat.

He leaves you with no words Alone,constipated and sad.

It doesn't make him exactly uncomfortable but he finds anything regarding hygiene and..like toilet stuff gross. Like "no i will not help you eject the fecal matter in your rectum out of your anal canal...nasty."

Formaggio~

Formaggio also has ibs..like he feels your pain so he knows. Hed also be very willing to shit in the together toilets while holding hands in agony with you.

Lets say if you did end up with double toilets and both of you having to shit really bad. He'd try and crack jokes to make you laugh and distract both of you from the pain. Énfasis on *try*

"Hey babe- why did the chicken cross the road?"

"Idk..why"

"...." "uh....to get away from kfc...?"

The joke was ass ofc.

This man is having a harder time than you. Hes sweating bullets while practically crushing your hand and screaming.

Sir looks like this:

[threepointseven]

hellooo this is my first time requesting, and i was wondering if you could do unrequited love with diluc and fem! or gn! reader ? like for example: reader is in love with diluc but he likes jean? sorry if this was already requested/ or is too unspecific, you can always delete this req if it bothers you!! take care <3

🌺summary!🌺- you’ve had a crush on diluc for 8 years, and he ends up falling inlove with jean. What will he do when he’s force to pick one or pay a ridiculous ransom or death, by the fatui?

Type- Fanfic 🌻

Flowers included!🌼= Diluc x reader, diluc x jean

Note🍀= I AM SO SORRY IF I GOT THIS WRONG 😕😕😕 I DIDNT KNOW IF U WANTED HC’S OR A FIC SO I MADE A FIC PLS FORGIVE ME IF I GOT IT WRONG

Genshin masterlist

💐Your bouquet has been delivered <3💐

You watched as the red haired bartender talks to jean from a table in the corner, taking a sip of your drink as you see the smile painted on Diluc’s face. Ever since you came to mondstat youve been head over heels for him. Your feelings were most definitely there hut you suppressed them until you were sure he felt the same, you guess that day wont ever come as you overhear the conversation of the blonde and the tavern owner

“Ah, you should maybe come over today. I have no work for a day or 2”

“I’ll think about it..”

His sigh of annoyance says otherwise by the red blush he’s trying to hide. You’re so inlove with him. You thought as the two exchange flirty jokes.

Ever since that night at the gates of mondstat youve been head over heels for him, youve tried your absolute best to make him look your way. Even if it was just the slightest glance youve tried it. He knew you, you’re one of his closest friends, but not as close as Jean.

It was such a waste, all your flirts and all the times youve helped him, all of it was a waste as you see the pair talk like newly fucking weds everyday.

He knows you have a thing for him, right? Theres no way he doesnt.

But.. youve been friends with him for so much more time than this woman right? Why wont he look at you. Just one glance…

Your friends were no help, clearly since as you rant about your love for diluc they seem to take Jeans side.

“Well…even if youve been friends with him for longer, quality over quantity right?”

It was a tuesday morning, 3 am when you were suddenly abducted by a group of men, seemingly fatui men. You wake up to the squirming of the grandmaster jean.

What is she doing here? What am i doing here? Where am i?!

The panic set in as the 5 fatui men discuss among eachother.

“Who are you and what are we doing here?!”

The grandmaster speaks up firmly.

“Isnt it obvious? We’re taking you hostage. Diluc ragnvindr will happily pay the ransom dont you think?”

“What does diluc have to do with this?!”

The blonde screamed as she sweat, you could see the panic set in her eyes.

“We told him that we’re holding you two hostage, simple.”

Your eyes widen as your eyes threatened to tear up. The seconds turned into minutes and the minutes turned into hours before you heard a loud bang on the building before catching a glimpse of dilucs fiery eyes, his greatsword painted with crimson.

“Diluc! So you’ve decided to pay the rans-“

Before the man could fully speak he was hit by flames along with the group of men. The entire group supposedly knocked out before he attempted to rush to our side.

He was an inch away before a beat up fatui laced with burn scars weakly stood up and put a gun to my head.

“P-pick one or pay the ransom pretty boy.”

He stuttered but he wasnt kidding as he loaded the gun and pressed it further onto my skin.

The fatui’s reflexes too fast, and the gun was simply too close. A ransom of 10 million mora wasnt impossible for Diluc but it was insane.

You stared wide eyed as Diluc freezes, staying put as he silently panics and attempts to decide.

Sweat rolls down his face as he sighs shakily and quickly wraps his arms around Jean, kissing her as an extra.

How cruel.

Love is cruel.

Tears well up in your eyes as your mind races at the feeling of the gun to your head, the fact the man youve had the biggest crush on for more than 8 years is now kissing the woman he met 12 months ago.

Your heart shattered to pieces as you see the pure sorrow in his eyes as he runs away into the fire with jean in his hands.

“Quality over quantity right?”

[noritoshiikamo]

WE! NEED! KAMO! NORITOSHI! AS! A! FATHER! AU!

hddjjdjdb MAAM I REALLY DO WANT TO WRITE NORITOSHI AS A FATHER but jddjjdjd my nori content dont get much attention and im tad demotivated to write especially on him so djdjdj but enjoy my tiny hc of how i imagine him as a father if i ever write about him again

noritoshi kamo dad thing:

likes the idea of having kids in even number (2,4,6 etc etc) so no one be left behind or ignored

like the idea of having twin

prolly would have 2 girls (itching to have more)

breaking clan norm by having first born female that carries his clan inherited blood manipulation technique

train his kids better than he was trained before, less emotional and physical abuse

prolly a strict but lowkey cool dad vibe

keeps picture of his kids in wallet AND the back of his phone vibez

drives around the neighbourhood just to make the babies sleep

likes to let his kids explore shits like not force them to just master weaponry or jujutsu like go head take an art class his kids prolly take advantage of that by signing up for multiple classes and abandoning but hes rich so its okay

always make it for every moment. archery competition? he’s there. piano performance? he’s coming. gymnastics competition? he’s there. parent-teacher conference? he’s there. daughter for called into principal’s office for beating a kid up? he’s there proudly

accidentally become committee of his kids’ parent-teacher club

his clan can talk shit about him but he would beat them up the moment they talk about his wife or kid

he tied his bangs people he surely knows how to time his kids hair!!! would save tutorials from youtube and practise on his kids hair!!! which lead to:

THE FACT THAT HE WOULD WEAR SCRUNCHIES AROUND HIS WRIST ALONG WITH HIS WATCH!!! KEEP SCRUNCHIES IN HIS CAR!!! JUST RANDOMLY PRODUCE SRUNCHIES WHEN ANYONE ASK FOR HAIR TIES

would spent an hour of his every night in his kids’ room just talking!! even if hes tired and he wont even talk he just listen to his first born talking about how she’s getting good with her bow and how his second born is squeamish with blood. would read stories if asked. sometimes would talk about his day instead while his daughters listen attentively.

“you know,” he said, gently twirling the braided hair between his finger, “it’s okay if you don’t want to do the family thing. i’m not going to force you but i hope you can understand why are you going to be so important to me and our family.” he looked down to the sparkling eyes of his first born, lips pursed and concern in her face. “i-i’m not sure i’ll be good enough.” she said quietly, face slowly warmed up. he smiled, “you’ve always been enough to me and your mother. just, enjoy your life for now okay? it’s okay to be a child first, heiress later. i’m still here to take care of you.” he planted a kiss on her head, gently tucking her into the bed. “you don’t need to grow up too fast okay, sweetheart,” he whispered, his daughter nodded eagerly. he caught her gentle i love you, murmuring his own before heading to the door.

would let his kids have more options on their own lives, he’s there to help financially and emotionally

would use the kids to make his s/o jealous, dropping picture to his s/o at work with the kids with caption “on date without u lol” but would pick his s/o later for lunch with kids to make up

deffo the type who would kiss the scraps on knees, while his s/o calmed the kid down and just heal the wound without the kids knowing and be like look at you all healed, you’re such a strong girl and if the kids just start crying even louder he would take over and they’ll just be quiet in his arms in few minutes

would fall asleep with his kids in arms in random places in the house

could be in conference call on one ear and still holding his youngest in his arms

damn good at colour coordinating with his little family ✨aesthetic noritoshi kamo✨

just overall best dad ever 10/10 i wish i have one am i projecting in this one idk man probably

bonus, just me and my breeding kink talking, nsfw:

ceo of breeding kink™

just his wife round and full with his kids!!!! let him have more kids (responsibly ofc)

if the kids are out he likes to gamble and like to have a quickie in the most public places like she’ll be panicking and like “kids coming home soon” face down on the kitchen counter, tits out and hes just taking his time like the kids not gonna burst in any minute

the hand over mouth, holding tears, legs trembling, whispering “if youre too loud they going to hear” kind of fucking

s/o will definitely 100% get pregnant or he will put her back in her place (on his dick) wink wink

im projecting again can u see it

[nyashykyunnie]

Hello hello can I request first date and first kiss with xiao and diluc? both of them need sum love, especially xiao his angst potential is too much QwQ anyway thank you have a great day!!

A/N: Hi Hi Chirumiii!! Tysm for the request </3!! And I really agree with u that these bbs need more love hnnn!! I hope u enjoy this hc:D Have a great day too hnnn!!

𝕏𝕚𝕒𝕠, 𝔻𝕚𝕝𝕦𝕔 x 𝙶𝙽! ℝ𝕖𝕒𝕕𝕖𝕣: Fɪʀsᴛ Dᴀᴛᴇ ᴀɴᴅ Kɪss

ₓ˚. ୭ ˚○◦˚𝕏𝕚𝕒𝕠˚◦○˚ ୧ .˚���

﹢　˖    　✦      ¸ .　﹢　 ° 　¸.    ° ˖ ･ ·̩　　 ｡　☆.     　﹢　˖    　✦      ¸ .

I tell you, Xiao was very serious when it comes to this. Well, of course he is, this is for you after all. He doesn’t want your first date with him to be very...Disheartening.

The adeptus did his research thoroughly, he even went so far as to ask Verr Goldett for help.

She was very pleased seeing him like this, for once- He wasn’t thinking about his dark memories or his job. He was thinking of someone very dear to him, seeing him like this made her hear sigh in relief.

When she gave her suggestions, Xiao managed to come up with a good plan.

Xiao was very stiff in your date, appearing at some point nervous. His mind constantly trailed with thoughts like ‘Am I doing this right?’ ‘Are They Enjoying this?’ ‘Is this how mortals do it?’ ‘Am I missing on something?’

Give your boy a comforting pat in the back, it’ll really help him feel a little more assured. 

When you’re both walking, Xiao matches your pace. He’s not a beat slow or fast. He is with you and Xiao wants you to know that.

 Don’t expect him to be too into skinship, it seems...Too awkward for him and he’s afraid of exerting the wrong strength and might end up with you being hurt because of his carelessness.

However, if your eyes are very sharp- You’ll see him trying to reach for your hand but ends up retracting it and clenches his fist.

He wants to hold you, as close as you can possibly be- But the fear of just hurting you haunts him ceaselessly. 

But it’s alright, it doesn’t mean he wont hold you. He’ll eventually build up the confidence and he’ll softly take yours with his.  Xiao’s grip was firm, it’s obvious in his hold that he is someone who has fought numerous battles and wields his spear alone. Maybe his touch will feel a little sad no matter how loving and careful it is.

He wasn’t used to this, walking peacefully with someone beside him. It felt unreal.

Years of never-ending bloodbath, years of always being on high guard- It changed him drastically to the anguish he now suffers alone with.

Xiao was used to being able to not call someone his own, the walls around built up to the point he is trapped in the tight space of darkness of his own grief. Entangled by the karmic binds, forever cursed in the ways of always on the hunt- Xiao walks alone in a path he paved himself, nothing but suffering awaits him.

But when you came into his life? He felt like he wanted to lay down everything of him and just offer it all to you. His heart swore a silent oath to protect and love you in discreet ways.

Xiao takes you to Qingyun Peak and brings you further up the the floating island. He softly pushes your shoulders down to have you sit and he follows beside you.

“Wait a bit” He says, his amber eyes trailing off to the scenery ahead.

You look ahead to see the sky painted in amber and gold, the traces of the blue sky slowly disappearing as the sun takes it’s rest. Your eyes glistened, gsping at how stunning it was.

But Xiao’s eyes weren’t looking at where your gaze wanders, his orbs only looked towards you. 

To him, this sunset doesn’t compare to the beauty that is sitting beside right now. With you, the Golden Winged King didn’t feel like he lived in eons of slaughter. 

It was as if you broke down the walls around him and removed the binds that tortured him, you presence felt like it was the sun itself to him. Your ascension in his life gave him a new light.

You were his flame, without you, Xiao won’t have his light. Where you are, is his guide to peace.

“Xiao this is-” He cuts you off, immediately locking his lips with yours. 

His eyes carefully shut as he brings you in closer, softly circling around your waist and maybe pulling you to his lap. 

His lips were warm, it was soft and it nibbled on yours lovingly.

When he realized what he had done, Xiao immediately pulled out- his face burning to the point even his ears were pinkish.

“I-I” He fumbled in his words, not knowing what to say. “I-I! I!”

Xiao tripped, humiliation flooding him and now he wanted to bang his head somehwere. HE EVEN PULLED YOU TO HIS LAP, HOW DID HE JUST LOSE CONTROL NOW?!

“Xiao?”

“I-I...”

No doubt Xiao won’t be able to look at you straight in the eyes after his -ahem- fail in restraining himself

ₓ˚. ୭ ˚○◦˚𝔻𝕚𝕝𝕦𝕔 ˚◦○˚ ୧ .˚ₓ

﹢　˖    　✦      ¸ .　﹢　 ° 　¸.    ° ˖ ･ ·̩　　 ｡　☆.     　﹢　˖    　✦      ¸ .

Who would have thought that the Head Of The Ragnivndr, who tirelessly rejected the proposals of many wealthy nobles who offered their beautiful daughters- Would eventually fall for someone and ask them out on a date.

A date with Diluc will no doubt be very luxurious (Well duh, this man is a walking wallet). This man might even dress nice, probably in a suit. 

Diluc isn’t used to something like this so expect him to be a little awkward at some point. But he’ll make ways to make this outing for the both of you entertaining. No one wants a date that is just bland, right?

He’ll take you to the wonderful sight in Monstadt. But expect him to avoid going inside as much as he can, Diluc doesnt want to deal with his annoying step-brother after all. He wants to save himself from the Cryo user who will probably wont let him hear the end of it.

He want’s this date to be perfect, he made a lot of efforts for this after all. When was the last time he fully devoted himself to something that isn’t about work or his nightly Darknight Hero agendas?

Who knows, but he doesn’t care. All that matters now is that he will please you, the person who he is willing to give his all to. 

He was always blinded by work, he never batted an eye towards anything else. He wasn’t interested a tad bit in romance, he believed he didn’t need it. He just needs to do what he needs to do. No need for that.

But when you came? Boy did he want to open his own head and check how much water had gone in. Maybe he wanted to smack himself and say ‘So, love is insignificant?’

When he fell for you, his heart burned with to desire to be wanted. He wanted to get your attention. 

The peaceful walk with you felt unreal since he was too used to being in front of piled papers or a blade in hand to slice down. Something serene like this.... Just felt like omething that he’ll only experience inside a dream.

His crimson orbs will always wander to you. Looking at you makes him feel cozy and his heart roared out bbecause he just wants to protect you. 

If he’s confident enough, he’ll softly interlace his fingers with you. He’ll even rub his thumb at the back of yours to have you know that he’s there and he wont be leaving you anytime soon.

Well, in fact... Diluc doesn’t even want to leave you alone ever. He wants to keep you by his side if you also want to.

Moments like this, precious time spent like this, he’ll cherish it closely in his heart.

After all, this might be the last time he’ll get to experience something as soothing as this. 

“Close your eyes” He softly says and you obey him, Diluc then takes your hand and leads you softly.

His touch, full of adoration. He steps were slow and steady, he even has his hand at your back to catch you incase you trip. 

“You can open them now”

The moment your eyes opened, the night sky painted with stars took your breath away. The wind softly blew, brushing against your hair and your strands now softly flew against the breeze. 

Diluc smiled at how you bright your face was now, seeing you this radiant made him feel as if he had been granted a wish of a lifetime.

This is all he wants. He knows this moment will eventually fade into a distant memory that he will no longer be able to ever reach, but it doesn’t matter. He’ll hold this as close as it can. It will now become a piece of his heart.

“Did you enjoy?” He broke the silence between you both.

“Yeah!” You cheered, turning your face that glistened it delight towards him. “This is too stunning, I want to see this every night!”

“That won’t be too hard to grant, I’ll bring you here anyti-”

His words were cut off when you suddenly pounced on him, bringing your lips together.

Diluc frozen in his spot, his orbs blinking in utter disbelief on the sudden move you made. He gulped, unable to function but he eventually returned the affection you were giving him, his arms snaked around your waist, pulling it closer to his figure. 

His heart raced at the contact your lips made, he locked it in for a second before lovingly kissing you even deeper.

Under the moonlight, two souls have united. The wind blew a soft breeze, as if announcing the fuse of two who were made for eachother. 

A/N: Aiyaaa, I’m beat. I’m sleepy and tired, I still have homeworks to do tomorrow so I’m taking a rest now jasjsksg. Have a great day/night everyone! Hope you enjoy this headcanon! **IMMEDIATELY PASSES OUT AND SLEEPS**

[arroganceisherfavoritecolor]

Dirty Little Secret

A/N: hello everyoneeee, this is my first oneshot fanfic on tumblr, which is a Rodrick Heffley x gn!reader, i hope u all enjoy!

warnings: cliche, probably words spelled wrong, bad grammer, swearing and thats about it!

----------------------------<3---------------------------------------------

RRRRRRR! Your phone went off, waking you up from your nap. you oponed it to see what it was, seeing a notification from your best friend, Rodrick. The message read;

"WAZZUP Y/N IM HAVING A PARTY AT MY HOUSE 2NIGHTTT

UR GONNA BE THERE RIGHT?? "

You smiled at the text. last time Rodrick tried pulling off a party without his parents knowing, he got into a LOT of trouble, so you kind of felt like warning him about the possible outcome, but decided to let him figure that out on his own. soon enough, you replied with:

"totally my little drummer boy ;))"

You and rodrick had been friends since your freshman year of highschool. you had first met when you saved him from getting his ass kicked, and ever since that day, you had started to grow feelings for him. he just made your heart fllutter, with his stupid little smirks, and the way his hazel eyes would randomly stare you down while in class.

it was all too much, in a good way.

RING RINGGG!

Your thoughts were shattered as you looked down to see an incoming call from Rodrick, sliding right you answered the call. "Hey doll face" said Rodrick through the phone. "Hola yeah boy." you and Rodrick had a little inside thing inspired by the song Yeah Boy And Doll Face by Pierce The Veil. Even though he used that stupid nickname in a sarcastic way, it still made you feel dizzy.

"What are ya up to?" says Rodrick. "Nothing much, what about you?" you reply, "Oh you know, just practicing for the party" Rodrick responds in a cocky tone. "Really? what song are you gonna be playing?" you ask, "Dirty Little Secret of course" said Rodrick. "Sweeeet, want me to come over early to help you set up?" you ask. "Naaaah its fine, thanks tho sugar" again with the nicknames. "Too bad, i'm gonna ask if i can go over" you respond. "Fine fine, i'll see you then Y/n" "adios.''

You then hung up.

After asking your parent if you could go to Rodricks, you threw on some clothes that were suitable for this occasion and headed out. You and Rodrick didn't live that far away from eachother, so you ended up just walking. You knocked on his front door, and soon heard banging footsteps coming from the garage area. "HEy Y/n, come on in" Rodrick said while aking your hand and leading you to his garage. "Hey Y/n" all of Rodricks band members said, they knew you had a thing for Rodrick, it was obvious after all.

"alright Y/n, we need you to be the judge of how we play today" said Rodrick. you nodded.

~Timeskip to after the (horrible) practice~

"So what do ya think Y/n???" rodrick asked, hoping for a positive response. "Um..you guys did good! Everyones gonna love it" you replied, causing Rodrick to nearly jump for joy. "Wait, what time is it?" asked one of Rodricks bandmates. you took your phone out of your pocket to check the time, "6:25" you answer. "OH SHIT EVERYONES GONNA BE HERE IN LIKE 5 MINUTES-" exclaimed Rodrick, only to be cut off by Greg and Rowley walking into the garage. "Whos gonna be here? oh and hi Y/n" Greg says. "None of your beeswax" said Rodrick, which made you lightly punch him in the shoulder. "Rodricks just having a small get together, but dont tell your parents" you said, you were always there to defend Greg from Rodrick being an ass. Greg nodded and went back to his room, Rowley following behind him. After that, everyone rushed to get the lights on and snacks out. soon, you heard a knock at the door, you checked the time; it was already 6:35. You answered the door, seeing multiple people from yours and Rodricks school. by the time it was 6:40, the house was packed with teenagers hoping for an awesome party. you heard the garage door open, making everyone go outside.

There he was, in all his glory, your little emo boy on the cement pavemant of a stage. Except he wasnt in the back with his drums like usual, he was in the front with the microphone. Singing wasnt exactly his forte, judging from what happened with heather hills that one time. He saw you staring and gave you a wink, which you giggled at. excitment filled everyone, as much as Rodricks banned kinda sucked, it was still pretty cool. Soon, the guitarist started, and then the drummer, then the bassist. A wide smiled spread across your face as the started to play the intro to Dirty Little Secret.

"Let me know what I've done wrong, when I've known this all along"

"I go around to tie my two, just to waste my time with you"

rodrick (very badly) sang into the microphone, you saw everyone slightly cringe.

"tell me all that you've thrown away"

"Find out games you dont wanna play"

"You are, the only one that needs to knooOOOW"

"I'LL KEEP YOU MY DIRTY LITTLE SECRET< AND DONT TELL ANYONE OR YOU'LL BE JUST ANOTHER REGRET (just another regret hope that you can keep it) MY DIRTY LITTLE SECRET. WHO HAS TO KNOW?"

Rodrick sang at the top of his lungs, his bandmates singing the adlibs.

"When we live such fragile lives, its the best way, we survive"

"I go around to tie my two, just to waste my time with you"

"Tell me all that you've thrown away, find out games you dont wanna play"

"You areee, the only one that needs to knooOOOWW"

"I"LL KEEP YOU MY DIRTY LITTLE SECRET, DONT TELL ANYONE OR YOU'LL BE JUST ANOTHER REGRET"

"MY DIRTY LITTLE SECRET, WHO HAS TO KNOW?"

"THE WAY SHE FEELS INSIDE"

"THOSE THOUGHTS I CANT DENY" "THESE SLEEPING DOGS WONT LIE" "AND ALL I'VE TRIED ITS TEARING ME APART'

"TRACE THIS LINE BAAAACK"

Rodrick saw you in the crowd, and looked deep into your eyes.

"i'll keep you my dirty little secret..dont tell anyone or you'll be just another regret"

"I'LL KeEP YOU MY DIRTY LITTLE SECRETTTT DONT TELL ANYoNE OR YOU'LL BE JUST ANOTHER REGRET MY DIRTY LITTLE SECRET DIRTY LITTLE SECRET DIRTY LITTLE SECRETTT WHO HAS TO KNOW? WHO HAS TO KNOOOoW!" Rodricks voice cracked up, which made you giggle. The crowd clapped at the silly performance. Soon after, everyone headed back inside to hang out and party.

You went up to Rodrick and told him how amazing he did. "Thanks Y/n" he said, blushing while looking down. Rodrick turned around and whispered something to his band, which made them smile and walk away. He looked back at you and said "Lets go to my room, yeah?" You silently nod, and follow him up the stairs towards his room.

Rodrick closed the door behind you, and sat you down on his bed.

"Uhm, y/n..i've been wanting to tell you this for a really long time now.." you put your hand on his, trying to calm his nerves, little did you know that made it worse. "i..i love you. i love you so much"

"Rodrick.." Your eyes widen, your cheeks heat up. You find those beautiful hazel eyes stare into yours, until they close of course. You copy Rodricks action and close your eyes. The both of you lean in and share a kiss long awaited. His lips are softer than they look, and he tastes like cherry lip balm. You both pull away and smile, blushing at the thought of what just happened.

"I thought your mom had told you to not kiss anyone with the door closed?" you ask. Rodrick smiles and says,

"I'll just keep it my dirty little secret."

--------------------------------<3-----------------------------------------

A/N: TYSM FOR READINGGG im sorry it took so long to come out, but at least its here now! ty again for reading! have a nice day/night<3

[nikethestatue]

So heres the thing that i found really confusing is why the hell some people call Az bonus chapter “uncomfortable and “ toxic”. The first time i read it i mean..that Elriel scene was hot 🥵🥵but toxic?? Thats the last thing i’d think of because u know why?? It is a freaking NA book.

For me the chapter compare to any other NA books i’ve read ( lj shen, rina kent, pen. douglas) is sooo vanilla like only the cherry on top. The antis do know right that now acotar being market into NA instead of YA so darker content is expected and there will be A LOT OF SEX, THINKING ABT SEX AND AT ONE POINT WILL DO SEX!!!

We’ve seen Elriel soft moment in the four books ( truth teller, “do u want me to show u the garden”, “i’’m getting her back atc..) like their feelings towards each other does not come from nowhere. Everything Azriel’s said or think abt is the same as what Nessian did in acosf.

For me in a NA book if two characters feel lust towards each other then that is a good thing like that what makes the book NA in the first place. Sjm wants to write abt Azriel kinky fuck thats why the crumbs that he’s a freak and Elain is aroused/ not a virgin were mentioned like if they would bang right away then its not surprising for the readers *cough*offer and permission *cough*. So the argument abt Az is toxic and etc makes me assume 3 things

1. They still in the YA zone

2. Their fantasy abt Az is diff from whats written in his chapter

3. Because it is Elriel

Your thoughts??

Hi,

I think I agree with all 3 points, but I also feel that the author herself has changed--she is older now, she is writing things that are different, and despite how people feel about ACOSF, she basically devoted an entire book to someone dealing with PTSD and self-hate. That's very different from TOG or even ACOTAR. Hence her writing would be different as well, and probably not as appropriate for the YA crowd. I don't like generalizing, but the majority of what *I* have seen out there, when it comes to Gwyn adoration, are younger women--teens, early 20s. Gwyn is a typical YA character--spunky, very young, determined and 'unburdened' by female characteristics, such as a family, children, running a household, cooking, taking care of life, taking care of others. What's the most common complaint about Feyre now? She is boring. All she does is stays home and is pregnant, and why did she have a baby at 21? and now she is a MILF. Perhaps, perhaps not, but she certainly isn't the spunky, adventurous 19 year old of ACOTAR. The YA crowd loves Gwyn, and it's understandable.

Elain is a more cerebral character. You already know that she is probably not going to swing a sword, which is great. Because there is a place for characters like that. But I think that's one of the reasons for the hate -- she is 'boring'. However, I think SJM wants to write characters like these now, because with them, she can explore a variety of different ideas, even what femininity is, how a non-fighting woman can make a difference--she already began that journey with Elain in previous books. Ultimately she writes books about her version of female-empowerment and the difference all women can make. She's written like 10 books with fighting females. Yet, some of her more interesting characters are people like Yarne and Elide and even like Amarantha and Maeve, because they don't rely on the swords, but mostly their knowledge, cunning, abilities.

I think sexually, SJM is also ready to explore other avenues. I don't see her writing the same as she did 7-10 years ago. I don't see her writing scenes like earthquakes and tumbling mountains and snapping palm trees when a male character orgasms. It's a little (a lot) ridiculous, but I feel like we'll see a lot more of Cassian-like sex, than Rhys.

I feel like what disturbed some readers, especially the younger ones in the POV, is the 'realness' of the thoughts. It wasn't 'prettified' with some fanciful language (btw, like the REST OF THE BOOK). Nothing at all different between Cassian and Azriel, both think of and ponder and want sex. But I feel like people, for some reason, aren't as emotionally invested in Cassian, or maybe he was always viewed as 'lusty'. Azriel is mysterious and less obvious, but suddenly reading purely sexual thoughts from him was a wakeup call. And thoughts about the 'boring' Elain and not the girl-boss Gwyn.

I think SJM wants to explore some more unconventional, 'weirder' sexual things with Az, and I simply don't think that he'll be doing that with a character like Gwyn. Not because of Gwyn, but of who identifies with her--teens, young adults.

Listen, for all I know, it might not even be Elriel--it might not be Elain and Az (though I highly doubt it), but it wont be Az and Gwyn either. Like, Az is NOT spanking or tying up Gwyn, and again, not because of Gwyn, but because of Az. Just yesterday I read some comment about someone arguing that maybe 'Gwyn is ready sexually' and all that. And I don't argue that, though I didn't see any indication of it in the books. But the question is, is Az ready? Because it takes two to tango. And it seems like everything revolves around Gwyn and her readiness in those canons. He is never mentioned--like he is just a stud put there to penetrate. But I don't see that interest or willingness in his character for her at all.

Let's remember that 'offer and permission' came from Elain. Elain willingly slept with Graysen before marriage. Elain has been putting gentle moves on Az. SHE is ready. He is ready.

I think it's definitely an amalgamation of things, but these will not be YA books going forward. And if the POV was so controversial, then yikes, I don't think that the actual book would be palatable for some readers.

[ac3id]

bully anon 🚶. are u reading my mind? 👁️👄👁️ im literally writing a yandere!bully! bakugo x reader thing where he shares his darling w his crazy classmates 💅 also bakumomo 🤤

bnha: katsuki bakugou x fem!reader x momo yaoyorozu

warnings:  humiliation, degradation, noncon touching, bj. bakugo n momo be meanies :'), fem reader

momo has a kick for seeing u suffer, she just loves when ur eyes get glossy & a  sacred, hopeless expression masks ur face. she gets such a power trip from it that even the slightest bit of guiltiness she feels from bullying u disappears.

but she knows she cant make u cry the way she wants u too. u r not that scared of her. too u, she is just another rich girl picking on u because it boosts their ego. u honestly couldnt care less about those types anymore. so she knows u wont submit to her so easily and thats when she goes to bakugo for help.

the both of them have great respect for eachother, he knows how extraordinary she is and vice versa but when momo asks him, “what do u think of her,” signalling to u, hes a little confused. hes always thought of u as the pathetic type, u did not hold much respect in his heart or mind. hed often forget about ur existence even but one thing he had wouldnt admit, ever was that he also found u hot. very attractive. sometimes, late at night he wud pump his cock to the thought of u. the way u stretched during warm ups, ur beautiful curves. the way ur perfect, little ass bent and jiggled during exercises. he dreamed of going up to u & grabbing a handful. the way ur tits bounced when u ran, everything clouded his mind during late nights when he tried to release pent up stress.

so when momo asked him the question he gave the most honest answer, “just another extra, too me,” momo seemed satisfied w his answer, “so, u dont care about her?” she asks & bakugo agrees. “well she pisses me off.”

the spite momo held in her tone made it hard to believe it was actually her speaking. she asks bakugo for his help. she promises him that he can do whatever he wants with u, whatever. he had said he didnt care about u, it should be easy for him to bully u. he agrees besides, who could say no to momo.

it starts of with usual teasing, hes calling u names, deeming u worthless & laughing when he sees u tear up from his harsh words. he feels amazing, like he is on top of the world. he bullies u pathetically, calling u out on ur insecurities & turning it into a laughing stock for others. while everyone is laughing at ur weak state, fortunately for u someone comes to ur rescue– momo stands up against bakugo acting as she is actually disgusted by his actions, acting as if she wasnt snickering along w the others.

she defends u but what she says just makes u cry even louder. she never outright denies his insults. he calls u a worthless, piece of shit with no real importance to the world. from momo, its never ‘dont listen to him, u are an amazing person y/n!’ but its always ‘bakugo–san, dont pick on others for things they cant change about themselves.” she also thinks u are worthless? guess so? everyone just laughs louder, they know what she is doing & so do u. u know u cant take this anymore, the humiliation brings tears to ur eyes and u can feel the dam break slowly.

u run to the bathroom not sparing a glance behind. u lock urself up in one of the stalls, crying ur pain away. not after long, a loud thud bangs against the door w a crude voice following the tune, “oi, i know ure in there!” bakugo screams, his repeated banging on the door never stopping, “open up!” he continues but u dont listen to him instead putting ur hands over ur ears, trying to block out the sound of his loud cries.

u keep at it for as long as bakugo stands outside the door until u hear an explosion go off & the next thing is he looking down at u ferociously. his glowing, red eyes gleam a powerful hatred making u tremble over the toilet seat. he pulls ur face up by ur hair before slapping u across the face. ur face stings when his hand connect to ur cheek, ur head falling to the opposite direction, ur breath uneven as tears pools down ur eyes.

“oi,” he tugs on ur hair again, ur scalp burning as he tugs on ur weak roots, “u think u can just run away?” u strain ur eyes, trying to look up at him through ur watery vision. “useless bitch,” his stare is intense. his vermilion eyes scan ur tear stained face and he feels himself get excited. the way u are seated would make u face his crotch if it werent for him holding u up by ur hair, “u are pathetic, u know?” he says it like its a question but u very well know hes serious. u only sob harder at his words, fat, salty tears rolling down ur cheeks, u pray to urself that he leaves u alone.

unfortunately for u, the whole scene just excites bakugo even further. he feels his jeans tighten as he starts to imagine u sucking him off. it was just like one of his fantasies only difference; u were here in real flesh & blood withering under him. he drops ur head & u quickly turn ur gaze to the floor, peering down at ur shoes. ur face drops as u hear bakugo unbuckle his belt and pull down the zipper, u keep ur gaze focused to the floor not daring to look up.

what was he going to do? pee on u?

only when he calls out ur name u by mistakenly peep up. the sight u see is scandalous, he pumps his semi-hard cock in his fist slowly as he watches ur every move. ur eyes widen in terror when u hear him talk, “put it in ur mouth, bitch.” his order is absolute yet u dont listen to him. there was no way u were actually going to suck his dick, ur eyes fall back down on the floor as u drop ur head down, “no.” u whisper, ur voice timid. bakugo frowns, what makes u think u have a say in this.

“what do u mean no?” he asks voice on edge, “i-its rape.” ur answer comes out in a weak, broken cry which makes bakugo scoff, “how? im not even touching u.” u try to reason but bakugo is having none of it. growing impatient, he grabs ur head and pushes his cock into ur mouth, completely ignoring ur cries. “bite me and i will blow ur face off” its not an empty threat so u obey. it wasnt like u would be able to win against him anyway.

“suck on it, whore. im litreally asking u to do one single thing but u cant even do that?” bakugo is crude with his words, never missing any opportunity to talk u down. u start sucking on his cock, ur head bobbing & tongue swirling around his tip. he hisses in pleasure, this was so much better than his imagination.

“look at u go, guess the rumours are true afterall.” he laughs. u can feel him coming closer. his cock twitches in ur mouth as he bites his lips roughly, eyes screwed shut in pleasure. his cock hits the back of ur throat before he cums in ir mouth. hot, salty liquid shooting down ur throat making u feel nauseous. “guess sucking dick is the only thing u are good at,” he remarks letting go of ur face. and pulling his pants on. embarrassed, u turn ur face away from him sobbing softly as u wait for him to leave but he never does. instead he watches u cry.

“what are u doing?” another voice breaks in. momo stands outside the bathroom stall knocking on the wooden door. ur head turns to face bakugo in a flash as he goes unlock the door. u grab on his arm, pleading him to not open the door. u didnt want momo to see u in this state. bakugo stares at u before throwing a chasire grin as he opens the door.

more tears fall from ur eyes as u see momo waiting out, concern written all over her face. her fear only increases when she looks over ur broken form. “what happened in here?” she turns to bakugo but recieves no answer, “he raped me!” u scream & momo’s eyes widen. she turns to bakugo, giving him a genuine glare. she approaches u slowly, her hands rest on ur shoulder as she pushes ur face into her boobs while she rubs ur back with soothing circles. “what did he do?” u find it strange how bakugo hadnt left yet, he was technically exposed. what good could it do him? watching the girl whos mouth he just violated get pampered. u tell her about he shoved his dick down ur throat forcefully. u were not sure why she was being all nice to all of a sudden but it was comforting. u keep hugging momo as u cry about bakugo. he just clicks his tongue before getting to leave but momos suggestion holds him back, “why just her mouth?” momo pulls away from ur embrace, her hands now falling behind ur back as she captures ur wrists and bounds the away with ropes she had created. ur wrists adjust uncomfortably behind u. next, her hands reach out between ur legs, forcing them open.

“momo, what are u doing?” the false sense of security is gone as she flips over ur skirt displaying ur light pink panties to bakugo. u squirm around trying to get free of the ropes but its impossible. “didnt i tell u that u can do whatever u want w her?” ur face pales as she starts talking. “shes a virgin, u will have fun. im planning on recording it.” her nimble fingers play with ur clit over the fabric making u wet. “besides, look at her. dont tell me she doesnt want this.” her fingers vanish behind ur panties as she plays with ur holes, ur arousal sticking to her fingers deliciously.

bakugo looks at scene displayed before him and feels himself raging a hard–on again. he takes a good look at ur crying face wrecking u and filling u with his cum till the brim while momo records everything.

[cloudycrystalkpop]

Stray Kids as Hybrids

Bang Chan

Dog Hybrid

The most loyal pup

GREAT with kids

If you have any or live in a house hold with little ones whoo boy

Chris loves them

He has the energy to run around and play for ages

Or just sit down and play with toys for hours

If you dont live with kids, you may wanna consider getting another hybird so he can have a companion

Chris is a sweetie but he can get very lonely if left by himself

But hes very responsible

So you wont need to worry about him hurting himself or making a mess if left alone

Hes quite a guard dog too

He might be small but he will protect his loved ones and his master

Lee Know

Hes a cat. We know this

L a z y

Eats anything

Then regrets it

Dont leave him with children

He will hate you

Hes fine with other hybrids tho

Cuddly, but only on his terms

Pet him when he doesnt want and you will get bit

But overal hes rather soft anf cuddly

Is more then happy to be the only hybrid in a household

Or share with several others

As long as he has His Spot to nap

He doesnt much care

Changbin

Hes a dog but he acts like a cat

W e i r d

Stares at nothing

Yips for no reason

Would fall into a pool by accident

Sneezes in his sleep and wakes himself up

Cries about it bc it scared him

Pls dont leave him alone for long

Hes going to break something

He doesnt mean too and he might go run and hide bc hes scared of getting in trouble

Doesnt know his own strength

Might hurt himself

Just needs l o v e

Loves belly rubs

Drools in his sleep but loves to give you kissess

Hyunjin

Kitty

But lowkey a bitch

Knocks shit over for 0 reason

Would lay in your clean laundry bc it's w a r m

Would also climb up and lay his head on your keyboard

Bc he needs Attention

Will get jealous if you have another hybrid

Bc he wants all of your attention

Pls pamper him and give him pretty collars and outfits

Collars with bells p l s

Purrs most when hes bothering you and you give in

Bc hes proud of himself

He is your most prised possession and he knows it

Han

I may have an unpopular opinion here but, hes another kitty

Needs his alone time

Likes to nap in weird places

His ears as so s o f t

He likes cuddles but doesnt need as much physical affection

He likes just following you around, maybe brushing his tail against you

Hes showing affection

Likes playing with other hybrids but he can get overwhelmed

Anxious kitty, pls take him out of a situation if hes getting antsy

Maybe get some stim toys for him

Felix

Hes a cat but he acts like a dog

Just

W h y is he running so much

N o stop c h e w i n g on that

W h y is he covered in mud

100% chews on plastic

Great with other hybrids, especially dogs

I dont think he knows hes not a dog

But hes v tiny

But he also go z o o m

Playful boy, needs attention and playtime

But when he tires himself out chasing his tail,

He will come and nap in your lap like a cutie

Seungmin

Puppy

L o u d

But also

C u t e

Will ramble but his little voice is so cute

His little hands are so cute and he grabs at your sleeves

His pout is so cute when he asks for pets

H u g s

C u d d l e s

But will also laugh at 10+ volume directly in your ear

If you leave him and go out of the house you will find him curled up on your bed when you come home

Bc he missed you and its warm and smells like you

I.N

also a puppy

b a b y

he’s so fucking cute

might chase his tail

gets dizzy

giggles

g i g g l e s

happy tail wags whenever he sees you

even if he’s half asleep if you walk into the room it’s

*thwap thwap thwap*

that’s his tail against the couch

puppy eyes for d a y s

good luck ever saying no to him

likes playing with other puppies

but also cat hybrids like him

he’s so happy when he gets pets and cuddles

snuggles his face against you and

g i g g l e s