#so they're quite literally girlbosses

[deadlysmiles70]

Miku design I made for fun! The theme I had in mind was like Cotton Candy skies. Her hair has taken 40 years out of my lifespan. It took about 4 hours to get just that mass done. But here she is!

[jackhues]

...and maybe it's not love... | oscar piastri

note: here's part 2 <3 i think this will have 3/4 parts, but they might be split up if i reach the picture limit.

prev || next

pairing: oscar piastri x fem!reader, logan x best friend!reader, one sided!enemies to lovers

faceclaim: various, from pinterest

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youruser

liked by oscarpiastri, y/bffsuser, landonorris & others

youruser: what can i say? i'm a busy gal

user: bae... are you soft launching someone or is this just logan again? -> logansargeant: it's not me -> user: LOGAN MY GLORIOUS AMERICAN KING! WHO IS THIS??

user: why are the f1 boys here?? -> user: bcz she took a picture with oscar and i guess they're all friends now -> user: and it's only lando. quite overreacting

yourmomsig: too busy for family dinner -> youruser: ma if it was only our family i'd have been there. i just wasn't in the mood to deal with aunt griselda -> logansargeant: yeah thanks for that, i had to take ur place -> youruser: love you logie

logansargeant: you know you idiots are so cute it almost makes up for making me have dinner with aunt griselda -> user: stop he calls her aunt, 'aunt' - those two are siblings your honors -> youruser: i already told you i love you... what more do you want?

user: GIRL ARE YOU BACK WITH YOUR EX? -> youruser: ew no

user: come home the kids miss you

user: bae who is this man you're taking pics with? do i have to be jealous? -> youruser: nah we're just friends -> user: YOU MEAN YOU'RE FREAKING US ALL OUT TO TELL US THE MAN DIDN'T EVEN MAKE IT OFFICIAL YET?? -> youruser: i'm actually crying at this comment this is the funniest fucking thing i've ever read- -> oscarpiastri: she has literal tears streaming down her face -> user: ARIANA? WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE?

oscarpiastri: too busy of a gal to answer your texts? -> youruser: depends on who it is -> user: guys stop logan's besties are becoming besties- i love this!

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youruser

liked by logansargeant, landonorris, oscarpiastri & others

youruser: signin' out

oscarpiastri: photo creds? -> youruser: no -> user: wait... oscar was at the graduation??????? -> user: i don't think so... he took the first and/or third picture and neither of them are at the ceremony itself. i think he was just invited to the party -> user: quit crushing my dreams girl

logansargeant: proud of you 🤍 -> youruser: love you logie 🤍

landonorris: just in time for hot girl summer -> youruser: 🤪🤪

user: wait i thought she already graduated -> user: this is her law school graduation i think -> user: isn't she like 23?? how?? -> youruser: max course loads + studying during summers! wasn't fun, but i'm FREEEEE

user: girlBOSS

y/bffsuser: i love you !! so so proud -> youruser: i adore you 😘

yourmomsig: love you sweetie, i'm so proud of you -> youruser: love you more ma

user: wait where's the 'friend' she was soft launching a while back -> youruser: we're still going good, trust -> user: lowkey think it's oscar

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yourprivuser

liked by logansargeant, oscarpiastri, y/bffsuser & others

youruser: fun night with fun people

tagged: y/bffsuser, oscarpiastri, logansargeant, friend2, friend3, friend4

oscarpiastri: probably the closest i'll be to graduating -> youruser: it's why i graduated twice, once for me, once for you

y/bffsuser: girl my face was not nice in that last pic -> youruser: puhleasee you look hot

logansargeant: i feel like there's someone you need to thank for all of this -> youruser: uhhhh god? -> logansargeant: girlllllll -> youruser: ugh thank you logan hunter sargeant, the greatest american to have ever lived

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f1gossip

liked by user, user, user & others

f1gossip: sources say that oscar piastri was in fort lauderdale between the canadian and brazilian gp. he was most likely there for y/n y/ln's graduation, but we cannot confirm if he attended the ceremony or only the party afterwards. the two know each other through their best friend logan sargeant, and we can confirm that they've only become friends during the miami gp, which is around the same time y/n began soft launching someone she calls a 'friend'

many think her and oscar piastri have started or are starting a relationship, and the belief has been cemented by him attending her graduation party. these pictures look like oscar and y/n going out for dinner with her friends, holding hands at one point, and then hanging out at oscar's hotel afterwards. we cannot confirm or deny that any of these pictures are in fact oscar and y/n as they aren't clear, but they do look similar to them.

for more information on y/n y/ln, check out the link in our bio

tagged: oscarpiastri, youruser, logansargeant

user: i ship them

user: bro who even is she??

user: how much y'all wanna bet she's not even really friends with logan?

user: that doesn't even look like oscar, y'all wilding

user: maybe he's just there to support a friend (in denial)

user: she doesn't look good

user: i don't like them together

user: oscar's too good for her

user: y'all hella interested in people who don't give a shit about you

youruser: wow my very own post on f1gossip- mom look i made it -> yourmomsig: congrats baby -> user: HER MOM ACTUALLY COMMENTED LMAOOOOO -> user: i changed my mind i stan her -> user: guys i really hope she's with oscar -> user: i don't think she is 😢 otherwise she'd probably ignore this post

user: y'all as much as i love them, i doubt they're together- most wags ignore these posts and this chick's out here commenting and calling her mom 💀

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Y/N STARED AT THE MCLAREN CAP, unsure if she should wear it. It shouldn't mean anything to the public, just her showing support to one of her new friends. Because to them, that's all Oscar really was. Her friend.

They didn't know about the constant texts, the late night face times, the movie dates while across an ocean from each other. They didn't know about the way her heart would race whenever she saw his text, how he'd make her giggly and blush just by calling her a cute little nickname. They knew nothing.

Besides, she was wearing a Williams Racing shirt in support of Logan. Why should a simple McLaren cap - not even fully papaya colored - mean anything to the public?

"Oh my God, just put the cap on," Logan groaned, making way over and putting it on her head for her.

Y/N rolled her eyes, fixing the cap so it didn't ruin her hair.

"Shut up," she muttered. "I'm just nervous."

"You have no need to be," Logan promised her. "Oscar's going to lose his mind when he sees you in person, turn into a stuttering, stumbling mess, and you're going to be so touched by his awkwardness that you're going fall in love. All in all, it's a win-win situation."

"I don't like you," Y/N rolled her eyes, following Logan out of the hotel and in the car. She had arrived in England a few days ago, but kept a low profile. She missed the first two practices, before deciding to arrive on track for FP3 and quali. She'd also make her way over for the race tomorrow.

The two best friends shared TikToks and reels with each other during the short drive, making their way out of the car and towards the paddock once they arrived. Y/N tried to keep her hands at her sides, away from the McLaren cap on her head. No need to make it obvious. Cameras flashed and recorded videos as her and Logan walked down, making her incredibly nervous.

She felt hot, really hot. And... was she sweating? She resisted the urge to smell.

"You're fine," Logan promised, sensing her inner anxiety. "Nobody's focusing on your cap, they take videos of all the drivers arriving at track. Stop spiraling."

Y/N blinked back to the present at Logan's words, realizing that she was indeed falling into a spiral. It was all going to be okay. Logan was going to be there no matter what.

"Thanks Logie," she smiled. "You're the best."

"Yeah, I know," he nodded to himself.

She rolled her eyes, swatting him in the arm. Arriving outside the Williams' garage, she waved at Alex Albon.

"Hey, Y/N," he jogged over from inside. "How are you? Logan never even told me you're coming."

"I'm great Alex, thanks," she grinned. "And it was a bit of a surprise. I didn't want people to know I was coming here today. I have a job interview in a few days, so I decided why not come early and watch the GP in person."

"Good decision," he laughed. He looked at her cap, "Are you heading inside or heading to McLaren?"

"Uh... I think I'll head over to McLaren," she decided. "I don't want news of my arrival reaching Oscar before I get to surprise him."

Alex raised his brows, before fixing his expression, "Right, you guys finally met at Miami. I take it you became friends, right?"

"Yeah," Y/N nodded, trying not to let her heart eyes show. "I probably should've taken Logan's offer to meet his racing friends years ago. Most of them are pretty cool."

"I hope I'm one of them," Alex joked.

"You're at the top of the list," she winked. "Anyways, I'll catch you guys later on. Don't leave without me Logan."

"Same goes to you," he waved.

Y/N flipped him off, turning to make her way to McLaren garage. She could hear Logan's laughter behind her, making her smile to herself. Who knew when the last time he genuinely laughed on a race weekend even was?

Over the last few months, she'd seen lots of clips of Oscar and Logan hanging out together - more than usual - and usually joining them was Lando. It seemed that the Brit was interested in becoming friends with Logan after Miami, which honestly made her happy.

She arrived outside the McLaren garage, debating if she should head in or wait outside, or maybe just head back to Williams.

Before she could make up her mind, she heard someone make a surprised little noise.

"Y/N?" Lando asked, exiting the garage once he saw her. "You're here? Oscar that little brat, he never even told me you're going to visit."

"That's because he doesn't know," Y/N laughed. "It's a surprise. I kind of insinuated that I wouldn't be able to watch the race at all, but... well, I'm here!"

"Ugh you two are just so absolutely adorable," Lando sighed, slinging an arm over her shoulder. "C'mon, I'll take you to him. He said he's going to talk to his dad, I think."

"His dad's here?" She asked, stopping in her tracks. "Why did no one tell me his dad was going to be here?"

"Quit freaking out," Lando rolled his eyes. "His real dad's not here, I don't think."

"Then who is he — Charles?" Y/N asked. "They're still doing that little bit from Monaco."

Lando pointed to where Oscar was, indeed talking with someone in Ferrari gear. Y/N stood on her tiptoes, recognizing Charles Leclerc and his girlfriend, in the middle of some conversation with Oscar. Leo slept soundly in Alexandra's arms.

"Let's wait for them to finish their conversation," Y/N suggested, feeling bad for coming up to them while they were talking.

"Nope," Lando shook his head, leading her across and closer to Oscar.

"Lando, no, no, no, Lando, I will throw you under one of the cars, no, Lando—"

"Quick, laugh like I said something funny," Lando whispered.

Y/N was so surprised by his request, that she stopped trying to plot his murder.

"Laugh, woman!" Lando muttered.

"Oh, right," Y/N responded.

Trying her best to seem somewhat genuine, she thought of that time Oscar texted her because he walked into a pole. Which made her laugh so hard, she walked into a door.

She giggled at the memory, laughing as the duo approached the others.

Lando, seeing Oscar's head whip over immediately at the sound of her laughter, began giggling too. The two had to stop a few steps away from Oscar, Charles and Alexandra because of how hard they were laughing.

"Did you see— the way he—" Lando couldn't get a sentence out without bursting into another round of laughter.

"Lando, get your shit together," Y/N wiped her eyes, straightening up.

Charles and Alex raised their eyebrows, entirely confused by what was happening a few steps away from them, while Oscar stared at Y/N like she was a mound of gold.

"Okay, okay— never mind, I can't do it," Lando fell into another round of laughter every time he remembered how quickly Oscar looked at her.

"Oh my God," Y/N muttered, sending an apologetic smile towards the trio near them.

She grabbed Lando's arm and dragged him the final few steps, smiling at the small group.

"I'm so sorry about that," she apologized. "Lando here doesn't know how to behave."

At this point, Lando's laughter, which was finally beginning to stop, starting up all over again.

"I'm sorry guys, I'm so sorry," Lando got out. "I'm not laughing at you guys, I promise. I'm laughing at Osc."

"What did I do?" Oscar asked, finally snapping out of whatever trance he'd gone in after hearing Y/N's laughter.

At his question, Lando's laughter came back, this time high pitched and bringing on some tears.

Y/N leaned closer to Oscar, whispering, "Is this normal?"

"Just ignore him," he responded, hoping she couldn't hear his heart beating all over his body. "It'll stop eventually."

"If it doesn't it'll give the rest of us an edge in the race," Charles offered.

"Right, uh Charles, Alexandra, this is Y/N," Oscar introduced them, the group now choosing to ignore Lando as he sat on the floor and laughed some more. "She's uh, a friend of mine, and also Logan's best friend. She usually only comes to Miami, but apparently is here today."

"Surprise!" She grinned.

Oscar smiled, the feeling of her happiness radiating towards him. Maybe he liked surprises a lot more than he realized.

"Logan, uh..."

"Sargeant," Lando supplied to Charles from his spot on the floor, wiping his eyes to clear up some tears. "The one who drives for Williams."

Y/N's smile dipped slightly at the reminder that Charles was another driver who wasn't quite close with Logan. But she brought the smile back immediately, doing her best to be nice.

In fact, it was only because Oscar had his eyes on Y/N the entire time that he noticed the small dip. He didn't know just what it was about, but he remembered her make the same expression when she first met Lando.

"Right, yeah," Charles nodded. "I just wanted to make sure I had the right one. It's nice to meet you, Y/N. I'm Charles, and this is my girlfriend Alex."

"Nice to meet you guys," she smiled again, and it was as if nothing was wrong. She cooed at Leo asleep in Alex's arms, "Aw, cute dog. I've been more of a cat person my whole life, but I love puppies."

"His name's Leo," Alex introduced the dog.

"Oh, he's adorable," she grinned.

"Well, it was nice to meet you Y/N," Charles nodded in her direction. "We've got to go now, but hopefully we'll see you later on. Bye Lando, bye son."

"Bye dad," Oscar laughed.

"Bye," Lando waved at them.

Once they were gone, Y/N looked back at Oscar, only to see him already looking at her.

"Hi," she smiled.

"Hey," he breathed out.

"Oi, you two are being too lovey dovey in front of the cameras," Lando warned them. "Go to the motorhome or something."

Y/N rolled her eyes, but he wasn't wrong. There were much more cameras around McLaren than Williams, and people would be dissecting Y/N and Oscar's every move. Considering they weren't even dating, she wanted to keep the secret for a little while longer.

"Right, uh... you wanna come along, Y/N?" Oscar asked her.

"Sure, I'm not due back at Williams until the end of the day," she shrugged. "I got to return my paddock pass then. Coming, Lando?"

"No thank you," he shook his head. "I like my spot on the floor, and I'd rather not accidentally be a cockblock."

"Lando, we're not going to have sex in Oscar's motorhome," Y/N rolled her eyes.

"We're not?" Oscar asked, a joking glint in his eyes.

"Take me out on a date first, then we'll see," she responded in the same tone, turning towards the motorhome and making her way there.

"Hey, I already asked," he reminded her, catching up. "It's up to you to decide when you're cashing in the rain check."

Y/N tilted her head at him, a small smile making its way to her face. "Tell you what, you win the race tomorrow, I'll go on a date with you the next day."

Oscar smirked, "Well, I have to win the race now."

"Nice to know where your motivation factor lies."

The two arrived outside the room, and Oscar opened the door for her.

"What a gentleman," Y/N grinned to herself, entering the small space.

She took a seat on the bed, while Oscar sat in the chair by the desk.

"Are you okay?" Oscar asked once it was just the two of them, no cameras, no Lando, no one else.

"What do you mean?" Y/N asked. "I'm fine."

"You're not fine, there's something bothering you," Oscar noted. "Or it did bother you at one point. When you were talking to Charles and Alex, you frowned at the start of the conversation. Right after I'd introduced you to them. Like, as if you were upset by something they said or did, I don't know."

Y/N frowned again at the reminder of that interaction, before shaking her head quickly to clear her thoughts.

"Nothing, I mean... like it's not a big deal," she tried to explain. "It's just this weird thing about me."

"You know you can trust me with anything, right?"

"I know, Oscar," she sighed. "It's just... it's complicated, I guess."

"If you want to talk about it, I've got time," he responded.

Y/N stared at him, remembering how she thought she hated him just a few months ago. She saw him as an egotistic prick, who'd left her best friend in the dust after stealing him from her. And here he was now... telling her he'd listen to her if she wanted him to.

"I didn't like you for a long time," she confessed.

At Oscar's hurt look, she continued quickly.

"Wait, no, that didn't come out the way I wanted," she closed her eyes. "I mean, like when we were kids, a long, long time ago. Because, for our entire lives, it'd been Logan and I. We did everything together, always. And then he got serious with racing, and he made other friends. Which was fine by me, because I'd always been his best friend. The only one who managed to come close to my position in Logan's eyes, was you. You were the one who'd managed to be one of his closest friends, because of racing, and you were the one who was closest to taking my place. And... well I was jealous. Which was why I often ran away after Logan's races, never stopped to meet you or talk with you, or any of the other drivers.

"And, you know, the years passed, and Logan and I remained close, and the jealousy faded, but then, I don't know. I guess I was embarrassed to talk to you, because I'd been jealous for so long. And then you both went into F1, and I told myself I'd be happy for both of you... but I wasn't, really. You just— I mean, you came into F1, and the love for you was immediate. The fans, your team, the other drivers. They all loved you, and they wanted to talk to you. And Logan... Logan got stuck with a shitty car and a shitty team, and none of the drivers even wanted to talk to him."

She took a deep breath, continuing, "and I know it's not your fault, but I love Logan, okay? Like I'd quite literally give up my life for him, and seeing him constantly in a place where he wasn't being treated fairly, where he wasn't happy.... it hurts. He's here because he loves racing, but every time people talk shit about him or act like he didn't put in so much work to be here, it makes me upset. I was... I don't know, envious of you on behalf of Logan, if that makes sense. And so I kind of ignored you during F1 as well. But then I began talking to you, and that first time I heard you speak, stumbling over your words, I think that's when I realized you were human. Just like Logan. You didn't choose it to be this way and you can't help it. And you know, a lot of times I can forget most of the people out there have never acknowledged Logan, because he's asked me to forget it so many times, but then they remind me that they haven't... and it hurts, Oscar. It hurts to see that. So you know, I'm sorry for judging you before ever even meeting you. That was stupid of me."

Oscar stared at her for a moment, feeling sick at her words. He'd never had someone who he was that close with, not outside of his family. He couldn't even imagine what went through her head every time she saw him, or the other drivers. He didn't blame her for her feelings, she had every right to hate anyone out there.

"Oscar?" she began hesitantly. "Are you... are you alright?"

He got up from his chair, standing in front of her and pulling her close. She immediately wrapped her arms around his waist, melting into his hug.

"I'm sorry," he whispered. "I'm sorry that I let it happen."

"Oscar, it's not your fault," she said, her voice muffled by his embrace. "I realize that now, and it's something Logan's always known. He's never blamed you, I don't either. It's just the way life works."

"It's not great," Oscar commented.

"Nah, not really," she agreed. "But it won't stay like this forever."

She wouldn't let it.

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f1

liked by youruser, logansargeant, y/bffsuser & others

f1: and it's the FIRST career GRAND PRIX WIN for oscar piastri! a daring move by the aussie in the final laps of the race put him ahead of max verstappen and as the leader of the race, where he led quite comfortably to the checkered flag

mclaren: that's our guy!!

user: OSCARRRRR GO OFF

user: LOGAN IN POINTS SOMEONE TALK ABOUT LOGAN IN POINTS -> user: your honor they're boyfriends

youruser: wow a race winner -> oscarpiastri: it was nothing

user: OSCAR OSCAR OSCAR OSCAR

user: someone check on y/n -> user: ???? -> user: well her and oscar might be dating no one knows. but she's besties with logan, and one of them won and the other's in points so she might be celebrating

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oscarpiastri

liked by youruser, landonorris, logansargeant & others

oscarpiastri: winning the race ➡️ winning in life

user: OSCAR JACK PIASTRI!! WHO IS THIS???

user: mans just dropped a whole bomb and left

user: boy isn't responding to ANYONE -> user: he said 'look at my girl' and then dipped

user: y'all that's y/n i'm calling it -> user: no she looks too tall in the second pic -> user: i think she's wearing heels

user: oscar get your ass back on this app and answer the peoples' questions -> oscarpiastri: no.

youruser: ugh i love her nails -> oscarpiastri: 🙄 she said thanks babe -> youruser: your girl loves me more than you -> oscarpiastri: i'm afraid it may be so

user: NAH IT AINT Y/N! LOOK AT HER COMMENTS

user: y/n bestie boo tell us who oscar's new girl is -> youruser: no.

user: y/n and oscar are hilarious bcz she's been soft launching her 'friend' for months and now oscar's hiding a whole girlfriend from us -> user: i see what logan meant when he said they're too similar but also completely opposite

user: i still think the girl's y/n

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youruser:

liked by y/bffsuser, logansargeant, landonorris & others

youruser: summer of 24... you were definitely one for the books

tagged: oscarpiastri

user: YOU'VE BEEN SOFTLAUNCHING OSCAR ALL ALONG????

user: the way i didn't actually see this one coming

user: I FUCKING KNEW ITT

oscarpiastri: best summer yet 🩷 -> youruser: got me blushing and shii

logansargeant: i'd like a written thank you card for being the reason you two are together -> youruser: no 🤍

user: i just KNOW logan's been their biggest shipper

yourmomsig: cutiess

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oscarpiastri

liked by youruser, charles_leclerc, logansargeant & others

oscarpiastri: it's been ten years in the making

tagged: youruser

user: SHUT UP

user: wait they've been dating for TEN YEARS??!! -> user: no i think he had a crush on her for like ten years

youruser: i adore you 🩷 -> oscarpiastri: it's hard not to adore me

youruser: s i m p -> oscarpiastri: are you complaining? -> youruser: no

logansargeant: again. am i getting a thank you at all??? -> oscarpiastri: sorry my future wife said no -> youruser: jasdjfakhfrshgous -> user: nah she real for that- i'd do the same if oscar said that about me

user: she needs to lose some weight

user: ew why does she smile like that

user: MOM AND DAD

landonorris: i'd also like a thank you for not being a cockblock -> oscarpiastri: no.

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f1gossip

liked by user, user, user & others

f1gossip: well it's officially been confirmed by oscar piastri and y/n y/ln that they are dating and have been together for at least the summer. it's unclear when they began dating, but we can assume it was after the miami grand prix, where it is believed that they met for the first time.

y/n y/ln is the childhood best friend of logan sargeant, and has took to social media multiple times to defend him. she has completed law school, and we believe she works in england, which is where oscar is located at the moment. for more information on y/n y/ln and the timeline of her and oscar piastri's relationship, check the link in our bio

user: bro who cares

user: i thought this was a driver gossip page not the wags

user: what does oscar see in her? -> user: right like she has to have bewitched him

user: i love her she's such a girlboss

user: idk how oscar does it. my brain would stop working once she smiled at me

user: something about their relationship screams pr to me -> user: like wdym they only met in miami bcz fans wanted them to and now they're dating -> user: nah that's sketchy

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notes: well here's the anticipated part 2!! i hope you guys enjoy it! if you'd like to be added to my tag list, please comment on part one of this series just so all the comments are in one place. let me know what you guys think of this part in the comments + reblogs <3

and again my tags don't always work, so you might want to follow my writing tag 'naqia writes!' or the tag for this short series 'the bsf of my bsf! series' so they show up on your dash at some point :)

don't forget to like AND reblog!!

tags: @ravisinghs-wife , @urfavsgf , @mxdi0 , @lemon-lav , @lilipiggytails , @stinkyjax , @blckgrl-sunflower , @littlemisssummer , @dreamsarebig , @k-pevensie28 , @themislovesf1 , @hellowgoodbye , @chezmardybum , @5sospenguinqueen , @charlotte1697 , @stylestastic , @sie17136 , @2lsargeant , @softpiastri <33

[nxathyx]

Bsd boys with a sassy reader

Chuuya Nakahara x gn!reader, Dazai Osamu x Gn!Reader, Nikolai Gogol x Gn!reader, Fyodor Dostoyevski x Gn!reader, Sigma x Gn!reader, Akutagawa Ryuunoske x gn!reader

More so with a reader who is good at insulting, back talking ect.

Trigger warnings: insults, cursing, a guy trying to hit on/harras reader but they pop and lock (girlboss besties), mentions of su!cide (on Dazais part, jealousy, mentions of alcohol and clubs/bars, slander, ooc, Let Me know if I missed anything

Chuuya Nakahara

°HE FUCKING ADORES HOW SASSY YOU ARE!!

°he wouldn't admit it but finds it so attractive and straight up admires you when you put someone in their place and or stand up for yourself

°would definitely praise you for it

°if he wasn't as prideful as he is mf would straight up be on his knees worshiping you and your words of degrading

°if y'all ever argued it'd just be you being your sassy ass self and him being like 🤨🙄😃😧😰 (progressively regretting his decisions)

Let's set the scene first shall we? You and Chuuya were currently in a club/bar. You were just engaging in a casual conversation with your boyfriend sipping on your alcoholic beverage of choice (or literally anything if you don't drink). You were having a swell time just enjoying that Chuuya finally had some free time from work, that is until this man came up to you, he wasn't necessarily bad looking, but he was very average and basic to say the least. Chuuya glanced at the male but not speaking anything of it.

"hey, cutie~ how about I show you a fun time, just you, and me alone in bed~

You didn't even spare him a glance, replying bluntly and shortly

"fuck off, im not interested"

The man looked at you with a smirk, totally ignoring Chuuyas presence. Nakahara felt disappointed, disgusted even by the mere nerve that guy had, but sighed and continued to sip on his wine

"a little bit of attitude I see, that's such a turn on baby.."

It was quite clear the individual was intoxicated, you finally glanced at him with a sigh

"shame your such a turn off, with that cheap ass target shirt" (I love target don't come for me😭😭

The male got rather angered by how you spoke to him and were barely even batting an eye at him. Chuuya was grinning just watching the interaction watching you insult this lowlife with no mercy

"aw, come on.. Don't be like that, let me give you a fun experience and a night to remember"

"a night to remember is when you'll fuck yourself on a chainsaw you pathetic lowlife, get your horny ass together, get a proper job, focus on yourself and be respectful that way you might actually get some bitches in your life"

To say the least, the man wasn't too happy, his hand snaking around your waist, your natural instinct of self defence kicking in as you kick him in the shin

"what was that for you bitch?!"

He asked, seeming pissed of at you, at this point Chuuya has had enough and stood up, standing between you and the guy

"can you piss off? They're not interested nor available, jackass"

The fucker simply ignored Chuuya and tried again

At that point Chuuya got fed up with him, slapping him and leaving the place. As soon as you two got home he was by your side making sure you're alright <3

Dazai Osamu

°he lives for your sassiness

°imagine if you both work at the detective agency and Kunikida is scolding him and then you just back talk, not even bothering to look at them

°motherfucker Was like awooga awooga let me rearrange your insides babygirl😻😻

°definetly finds that really fucking attractive

°will proudly stand right beside you like "yes. That's my s/o. Yes, they're a bitch, and I love them"

You and Osamu were currently in the agency office, you were filling in some papers, whilst Dazai was getting scolded by Kunikida like most days. You weren't paying much attention to why he was getting told off, but you assumed it was because of one of his daily shenanigans, like jumping into a river mid mission, or giving Kunikida fake facts and or advice causing pages from Kunikidas notebook being ripped or scratched out by the ink. After a few more scolding words from Kunikida, you're boyfriend went behind you, hiding behind your office chair, you hummed a little "Hm?" as Dazai proceeded to explain that Kunikidas scolding is pointless cause he hasn't done anything wrong, however most of it was muffled due to Kunikidas continued scolding over the desk, it was insufferable to hear as you turned to Kunikida

"can you respectfully shut up?"

Kunikida just looked at you completely surprised, Dazai on the other hand had a grin, falling on his knees in an almost comedic manner before you asking when it's his time to hear such degrading words from you

Nikolai Gogol

°does his silly goofy little grins

°pulls pranks on Decay members and uses you to do all the "explaining"

°annoys you as much as possible using his ability just to see you get all sassy

You were currently laying on the couch, in the living room, it was pretty early in the morning and you haven't ate breakfast yet. You were home alone, your partner doing god knows what, and you preferred to not know. You stood up from the couch to go make yourself some breakfast, you were in the mood for something sweet, so you decided on pancakes, grabbing butter to melt on the pan later, milk, flour, sugar, and.. You just looked at the content of the fridge, confused why it lacked the eggs, you could've sworn there was at least half a carton left yesterday, you sighed realising you either have to go to the store or just make something else, you sighed softly once more looking into the fridge, grabbing some jam, putting the flour and sugar back, before sliding a bit on your socks to put the milk and butter back in the fridge, just looking even more confused due to the eggs suddenly appearing, realising it was probably the jester playing tricks on you, grabbing the eggs quite quickly so they don't dissappear once more. You placed all the ingredients on the counter once more, beginning to make the batter, you were about to pour the batter on the pan, before noticing a small yellow portal, taking the pan in with a red gloved hand, sighing once more you said a little.

"I'll chop your dick off and dismember your head with that pan if you don't give it back"

Nikolai poked his head out a bit with a smug grin, holding the pan up, by the center but instead of the handle, causing him to burn his hand and getting a bit of the melted butter on his palm, dropping the pan onto the floor with a loud sound of metal hitting something. Although the sound wasn't pleasant at all you got to laugh at your boyfriend for being a little stupid fucking idiot

Fyodor Dostoyevski

°THIS FUCKER IS SO SMUG ABOUT IT

°if you ever Insult Dazai he'll give you like 5 countries

°if he truly loves you that is

°if not he'll Stil probably find it amusing, you might even get a little giggle out of him

°would definetly be sassy towards you as well

Fyodor was currently in his office (discord mod cave) , eyeing like 5 fucking monitors at the same time.

"Fedya, come out of your rat infested room already"

You said a bit irritated by the fact he's been there for like a week, not even bothering to come out for basic necessities, at this point you were even wondering where the hell he pisses— not important. It seems he has ignored you calling out for him. You opened the door, you wanted to ruffle his hair but just looked at that and almost gagged

"you look like an oiled up pan.. You better fucking wash that, I doubt even lice would want to be there"

And after saying that you left the room, leaving a confused Fyodor, who just sat there processing what the fuck you just said

Sigma

°okay Mr 3-4x bullcut would be nervous asf

°like he's scared you'll end up in a fight from the way you talk with others

°finds it humouring if you insult Gogol though

°would love hearing you insult everyone, in private

You were standing next to a machine in the casino, leaning your side against it until a fairly attractive female came up to you

"are you going to keep standing here and hogging the machine so no one can use it? Or will you move your damn self some where else?"

You were a bit stunned by the sudden hostility but slightly impressed and even amused

"i know damn Well your not talking to me with that 3$ wig your wearing right now, and don't even get me started on those earrings and necklace your wearing, like girl, did you grab those of a Christmas tree?"

The girl turned around on her heel, a few minutes later the number you had got called into the managers office. You walk in to notice Sigma trying to look stoic and not at all nervous, making you snicker a bit. Sigma turned to the woman and told her she's free to leave and he'll take it from here, the girl gave you a smirk as she left as if she just won millions, making you almost choke trying not to laugh

"dear.. Please stop being rude to my clients—"

"well your clients are bitches"

The discussion continued for a bit ending in you nuzzling your head against Sigmas neck as he continued to do his paperwork.

Akutagawa Ryuunoske

°this man is as sassy as you like oml

°don't say anything about Dazai, Gin or Chuuya though, or just people he generally respects

°feel free to talk as much shit as you want about Atsushi though

°if you ever tell Higuchi off he'll find it very amusing

°y'all definetly try to out sass each other

You and Aku were currently laying in bed, you were talking about someone at your work place that has been annoying you lately. You were insulting them freely, not bothered by the fact Akutagawa was trying to fall asleep, not until he told you to shut up, which ended in endless sassy comments going back and forth between the two of you as well as you a bit curled over in laughter and Akutagawa trying to hold back a snicker

I nnot proud of this but spent too much fucking time writing this and didn't even finish 💀💀

[qveenpoppy]

things i noticed in my pilot rewatch:

wolf almost immediately grabs a glass of champagne when he walks into the wedding with his first patient. i know the show's hinted at him having drug issues, but maybe he has some alcohol ones too? (unless that idea was abandoned since the pilot was written/filmed.)

"except now we're prescribing drugs instead of taking them." "speak for yourself." yeah he's definitely still dealing with those drug issues. i feel like the show's mostly implied for that to be a past thing (we've only seen him take anything twice, to my memory? not counting 1x09's upcoming flashback sequence) but i wonder if/when that'll become an issue again (maybe another patient loss that hurts wolf harder than roman's did? like a father figure, that'll bring back his feelings of guilt over his dad's death?)

it's tiny but i feel like van's crush is hinted at here, with him offering ericka an extra pair of scrubs (while jacob cockily jokes about his being too big for her) and the way he sneaks a glance at her while she changes (not in a creepy way, it's like a nervous/shy kinda way).

he also smiles at her when she yells at jacob while they're searching for hannah's childhood home, after jacob un-empathetically says the kids would be better off with their dad (guess van likes strong women; girlboss/malewife vibes? lol)

"do i ever have to talk to him again?" (wolf talking about nichols.) lmao, you're gonna be in love with him in about 6 episodes from now. also someone write me some pilot era wolfnichols hate sex.

"name one person you like who's not a patient." "you, i like you!" he's so autism-coded ❤️

wolf still uses cassette tapes in his car (which is also quite old, since it still plays tapes), what a grandpa

carol has a picture with michelle obama in her office (not really an important thing to notice, but i thought it was cool)

there's a line in one of the flashbacks (apologies for not quoting it verbatim) from muriel about "keeping our differences to ourselves", which probably explains why wolf isn't super open about his facial blindness. (and probably applies to all of his other traits that make him "different", like his sexuality, or popularly headcanon'd autism. i mean, i know he's open about his sexuality now as an adult, perhaps as a way of rebelling against his mom, but, as we may see in more flashbacks, he probably kept it to himself for quite a while.)

van is completely frozen when hannah has her seizure, he even backs up a little when she falls out of her chair. probably didn't wanna touch her and experience a phantom seizure.

whoever directed the ep made zach & teddy look like they're the same height when nichols confronts wolf and kicks him off the case. i guess it keeps them, literally and figuratively, on the same level in the dispute. but now we all know that wolf's actually shorter, and it's funny how that's been primarily highlighted when they're fooling around with each other. (i know it's an intentional directing tactic, though, bc a similar thing was done in the batman v superman movie when bruce and clark stand eye to eye - henry cavill is also 3 inches shorter than ben affleck. emphasizing the height difference would imply a power imbalance, which you don't want in these sort of gray zone conflicts!)

"the only way this will work is if we open up to each other." [nichols walks by and catches wolf's eye] foreshadowing

(i don't mean just like foreshadowing their romance, but maybe also the impact that nichols will have on wolf, getting him to open up about his past and whatnot. same, perhaps, for nichols, since we still hardly know anything about his background, besides his military experience and implied own closeting.)

(could also quite easily and literally refer to their work relationship, as we learned from that interview with teddy that, despite their romantic connection, they're still going to have some disputes about patient treatments in future episodes/cases.)

[sammiesallow]

Hiii!! Could you do headcanons for Ominis, Amit and Natsai of what they're like when they have a crush? Have a wonderful day/night Sammie!! ❤

OMG yes of course I can! Love them sm

Crushing hard!! (Ominis, natsai, Amit.)

Summary- what they're like having a crush! No pronouns specified

A/n- this is so cute! I love natty, she's adorable!! Cw's- none! Pure fluff and cuteness

Ominis Gaunt 🐍

Honestly, he doesn't want to admit he's crushing.

Is in denial until sebastian yells at him about it

"This is painful to watch... Can you just kiss her already?"

He realizes that he does indeed have a crush, and the first thing he does is avoid you like the plague.

Cause he can't see(obviously), he memorized your scent, the patterns of your walk, and your beautiful, beautiful voice

Now every time he hears It he freaks out and either pretends like he's sleeping, or quite literally runs away

The only reason he ever confronts you is when sebastian makes him

"If you don't talk to them, I will."

Obviously ominis does NOT want that.

He asks you to meet him in the undercroft after dinner, and confesses with a poem and some flowers

He's the sweetest <3

Natsai Onai ❤️

The absolute sweetheart she is....

The second she realizes she has a crush- she asks her friends. (Aka poppy and sebastian)

Knows that she likes you, and is admittedly nervous, but still spends time with you

She's the type of person to be ok with rejection. If you say no, it's alright, because in her mind you two will still be besties!!

Although one thing she notices quickly is how much she thinks about you.

It's really funny honestly, natty will literally be sitting next to you and still daydream about what your hands would feel like in hers

(Her hands are rlly soft btw)

Respectful queen, but also nervous queen

In this case, you will probably be the one confessing first.

She's confident, yes, but in this situation.... No

Cannot work up the courage to ask you out, but you feel the same and ask her out first (with the help of poppy and sebastian)

it's probably at the most random time, too.

You two will be walking out of class

"Hey natty, I really like you. In a romantic way. You wanna go out sometime?"

She turns a whole new shade of red

Surprisingly easy to fluster her!!

Confident girlboss but and absolute sweetheart in private 🤭

You go on little dates together and you fly her around on highwing it's adorable

Amit Thakkar 🔭

He's a baby. /pos

Sorry not sorry

When you show an interest in astronomy, he's over the moon!

Quickly develops a crush after the first few classes together

He's adorable, really.

When he knows he has a crush- Merlin's beard does he get nervous

Stutters and blushes every time he's around you

will constantly compliment you and shower you with praise

He thinks you're perfect in every single way, he's so in love

Asks for advice 100%

Man's is so nervous and sweaty because he is definitely afraid of rejection

But with some help he works up the courage to ask you out!!

He asks you on a date and tells you to meet him outside the castle, and takes you stargazing <3

You have a picnic, and he confesses his feelings.

It's absolutely adorable and he treats you like a prince/princess!!

[mcyt-trios]

PROPAGANDA:

Gaslight Gatekeep Girlboss:

Listen to me closely. There is no other alliance on the whole Traffic series as based as them. They did EXACTLY what they set out to do. Did they Gaslight? Oh fuck yeah. Did they Gatekeep? You better believe it. Did they Girlboss??? By the good grace of god they did!!!!!!! They are simultaneously the blueprint for every trio of mean girls in a 2000s high school movie and the most genuinely devoted alliance on the whole server. They trust and respect and love each other in ways beyond mortal comprehension. Vote them please I'm begging you.

They were an absolute powerhouse! Also also, Cleo finding herself a group of people who were properly loyal to her after being betrayed for the healing arc. Scott telling them he was the boogieman and refusing to kill even if it meant going red. They're just so hhhhhh

cleo is gaslight (setting things on fire), scott is gatekeep (protecting the base), and pearl is girlboss (girlbossing).

Quite possibly the most ride or die alliance of Last Life. Consistently sharing lives, helping each other get boogey kills, refusing to hurt each other… they were just such a feel good team up for the entire series :] and then they kicked Pearl out in double life :]

Listen they are the EPITOME of ride or die. They love each other so much during that time. Do you hear me. Dear God they are the most precious

Best faction on Last Life. Set the template for pretty much everything Scott and Cleo do together, and set us up for 5AM Pearl.

Prince Trio:

Me when they're princes and children of gods (said gods all being siblings. Making them all cousins) They all need very big hugs. Sherbert's dad (God of Creation) is trapped in Purgatory, and they tried to get them out at the end of season 2 and it failed (because Sherbert got. A possible god following them around (metaphorically) and changing things they touch sometimes-) because instead of it bring back their dad it brought back a person they killed. (Also happens to share their mortal mother with Rae) Rae's godly mother (Goddess of the Mind) sucks and corrupted multiple of their friends. (One of which was Sherbert.) and he's also the vessel for said mother, and got some silly mind powers because of it. Athena is literally a child created for being the vessel of one of their parents, who is also the God of destruction, which by proxy makes him the vessel of destruction and that is an awesome title-

[wordsmithic]

Hi, sorry if this comes out as a ramble, but your Troy ask made me rewatch the movie (for the umpteenth time, lol), and it brought a lot of old feelings back, both good and bad. The good is how much I adored the Iliad as a child and that's something that still thrives today—since I was a kid, I loved Greek mythology in general, partly because I'm Palestinian/a fellow Eastern Mediterranean, so there is a lot of overlap in our histories, cultures, customs and myths, but the Iliad has always been a favorite. Hektor is my favorite character (and I love him and Andromache), but I also have an immense soft spot for Briseis... and now to get to the bad, rewatching Troy reminded me how a lot of people erase her and her role—and her romance—to Achilles in modern retellings. Now, I'm not going to argue which Achilles ship is the best (especially because that man is a hoe, if we're being honest), I don't care. My problem is the modern erasure of Briseis and the other women in Achilles's life that are romantically entangled with him being reduced to, "He's gay, actually." It reads biphobic if you believe him queer (Patroclus too, who had many named women concubines/slaves), first off, misogynist second. He has a son with his foster "sister," Deidamia, and in some versions even married. In the Iliad especially, Patroclus tells Briseis Achilles will marry her and Achilles himself refers to her as his wife/bride, stopping a whole war when she's taken, and she's even allowed to aid in Patroclus's funeral rights. In some versions, Achilles falls for Polyxena, and tries to make peace with Troy so he can marry her. In the afterlife, Achilles chooses Helen as his wife for some reason. Just... all these women, with complex situations and feelings, are all reduced or erased in modern tellings (and usually for a man/Patroclus), and it makes me want to scream. People use the excuse of, "We don't like the romantic situation they're in," but then claim to "better" it by... erasing or reducing these women and their complex roles and feelings from the story overall? Brieseis, for example, mutually loved Achilles and saw him as a husband... he also killed her first husband and brothers, and you can argue part of her love is out of the need for survival. Yet, she greatly mourned him when he was killed, too. And if exploring this complexity is still not your yum, what about Polyxena? Wouldn't she fit the girlboss archetype of using Achilles' affections to gain his trust, before stabbing him in the back (literally)? Or Deidamia, who's young and left at home, bereft of her husband and son? Heck, try and fill in the gaps how Achilles x Hellen happened, if you must. All these women have an important role in the story, and to Achilles, that could be explored—but people don't because they dismiss what's already there or don't know anything about The Iliad outside modern retellings (mainly The Song of Achilles). So, we get people claiming things that are untrue ("Achilles and Patroclus are exclusively gay!"... in some myths, they're actually relatives/distant cousins, fun fact 😭), and acting like they fixed something by "adding" onto "flat female characters" in a way that reads inauthentic and ignorant to the source material. I get wanting to prop up one's chosen ship, it's just the hypocrisy of promising to be more progressive in one area, but diminishing the progressiveness of another, that kills me. Anyway! Sorry for the rant, I just have a lot of feelings I wanted to share because of the movie and I know you've talked about all this before—it's just something hard to discuss on the internet without people coming down your throat 🥲. Anyhow, justice for Briseis, is my rallying cry, I love her so much, queen made a whole war stop for her and managed to escape from Agamemnon unscathed. Queen who launched a thousand ships to my heart 🫶🏻.

I'm glad you re-watched it! It's a beloved of many Greeks since the movie is quite epic and makes you understand some of the original's glory. Hector, Andromache and Briseis are some of my fave characters in the movie, and it made me also look out for those characters when they appear in the text.

Btw, I would love to know a Palestinian's pov on our shared traditions and myths, how do you guys learn the Greek myths, what parts of them have had perhaps an affect on your heritage and since when, etc! 😍

Briseis' situation is complicated one because many people won't catch the nuance of her living in a patriarchal society as a war captive and thus developing a strange co-dependence to her captors. In addition, the Homeric Epics are a work changed by time in the Greek society, as people added and altered stuff, so many storylines have been affected by other layers of patriarchal societies. So of course the notion of "slave girl mourning her captor's friend" would seem natural, because they probably don't consider a slave woman's POV. Or perhaps she was in the mourning because she had to be there as a woman "belonging" to the Greeks, and the text does not mention it explicitly because it a given for the era. (I don't recall the whole relevant text sorry)

I am not sure if the average author - judging by what is published in the Anglophone market - can handle the complexity of Briseis and other women in the Trojan war. For Briseis one could go for a romance there but they'd have to depict all of her psychosynthesis properly, so it doesn't come off as "Achilles killed my family but he is hot so I love him". To be fair, it is a challenging task but I am still sad that I haven't heard retellings that do this well. Such a retelling done well would be chef's kiss!

As you said, unfortunately, the writers for now focus on the couple Achilles x Patroclus which, ok, let's accept it since it's a ship and there is some background to it (although those guys are most likely 1) cousins 2) very close to each other like brethren in a way westerners misinterpret). I've enjoyed Song of Achilles and I am surely not against such works, but you are right that the female heroines are reduced to flat characters. A fandom full of women manages to be misogynistic - again. We shouldn't be surprised because misogynistic influences are very strong in our societies still, although many don't see it 😕

[princess-glassred]

I have a really sweet au idea: Au where Bev and Eddie had kids with Tom and Myra, but after the divorce they were both left kind of broke and alone, so they move into an apartment together and kind of help each other raise their kids as platonic besties.

They each have one child, Eddie has a thirteen year old daughter named Sophia and Bev has a twelve year old son named Jack (i named them after Eddie and Bevs actors Jack Dylan Grazer and Sophia Lillis). It's important to note that neither Eddie nor Bev wanted kids, but now that their kids are here they are very dead set on trying to be the best parents they can. Unfortunately this takes place when they gang are a little bit younger and thus haven't become as super successful as they later will be, Eddie is still working a rather low end finance job (nothing as well paying as the risk analyst position) while Bev is working essentially as a designer for some fashion house, but not designing her own stuff yet. Tom and Myra both got the best lawyers because Tom is a vindictive asshole and Myra is a Karen, so poor Eddie and Bev are in a tough spot financially. Their apartment is pretty dismal, i mean they try to make it nice, but their bathroom/kitchen gets broken a lot and their fridge sometimes opens on its own, and since it's a two bedroom Jack and Sophia have to share a bedroom while Eddie and Bev share the other.

Ben and Richie sometimes come over to help them, Ben is head over heels for Beverly, he literally doesn't give a single fuck that she's a single mom, he loves her to bits and would do just about anything to help her out. He's kind of just some fuckin guy that comes over to the apartment sometimes but he's loaded and quite handy, so he's always helping them out. If they need grocery money, or money for a sitter, or if their kitchen sink is broken AGAIN he will he there for them. Richie on the other hand really is just some guy, he's Eddie and Bev's old friend from high school and he sometimes drops by to visit them and awkwardly interact with the kids.

Jack and Sophia have their own distinct personalities that bounce off their parents quite well I think. Jack is a very sweet and sentimental kid who clings to his moms side like glue. He adores his mother, mostly because he thinks she's so strong for leaving his abusive father and going out on his own. They're very close, to the point Bev often wonders if her son is... ya know 🏳️‍🌈? But she'd rather just wait for him to come to her about that than pressure him into admitting something he's not ready to share. Jack's also a bit of a theatre kid, he does lots of plays and is obsessed with musicals, so Bev makes him costumes for all his shows. Jack and Bev have the kind of relationship where they scream sing songs in the car together, usually girlboss anthems abour break ups because of how much Jack hates his dad. Tom really doesn't care about Jack at all and they are almost completely no contact, but he's pissed off that he cannot turn his son against Bev since he knows that would hurt her a lot. If he was was still in Jack's life he would no doubt abuse him and try to shame him for being so effeminate, which is percisely why Jack hates his guts. He honestly sees Mr. Hanscom and Mr. Kaspbrak as more of his father figures, because they've never tried to hurt his mom in anyway. Jack is really really hoping his mom will wake up and notice that Ben is madly in love with her, because not only would Jack love a sweet and caring step dad, he'd love a man that treats his mother right.

Sophia Kaspbrak is a bit of a problem child, although she certainly has her sweet qualities. She's like an older sister to Jack and she's a genuinely very good student, but it's clear Sophia's having problems with how radically different her life is now. She, unlike Jack, actually has a fairly good relationship with her mother and doesn't exactly understand why her dad had to leave. She understand that he's gay, but she doesn't understand why the divorce had to be so nasty and terrible, she doesn't understand that Myra was abusing Eddie emotionally and Eddie is really hesitant to share that. She shares a few physical traits with her mother, mostly being overweight and blonde, but she honestly looks more like her dad in the face. Eddie no doubt loves his daughter, but their relationship isn't nearly as good as Bev's and Jack's, mostly due to their conflicting personalities and Eddie's own issues.

Sophia is more interested in stereotypical girl things, she wants a boyfriend, she wants to be pretty, she wants to get invited to places and be seen as cool. This causes kind of a rift between her and her dad because, well, Eddie kaspbrak was never cool, neither as an adult nor child. She finds her dad kind of embarassing with how anxious and cagey he is, but she tries not to tell him that so it doesn't hurt his feelings. All of this isn't helped by the fact Eddie is informed Sophia is a bully at school to other girls, and Eddie feels like he's such a bad dad that he's raising the next Henry Bowers or Vic Criss. He really is trying to relate to his daughter though, but they're on basically two different planets. He goes dress shopping with her, he comforts her through her first period, he tries to listen to all her petty teenage girl drama and understand, but he's just really out of his element. He can't even ask Myra for help on this because he knows if he does she'll take it as a sign he's regretting leaving and might come "crawling back" any day.

Really I think Eddie's and Sophia's communication issues just have to do with his own fears of becoming like his mother, he's terrified of smothering her and suffocating her so sometimes he's either too indulgent or lax with her when she needs him. I think their relationship would flourish as she got older, but as it stands currently, Eddie feels like a terrible father pretty much all the time. Bev has to knock some sense into him about it every once in a while "Eddie, you're not bad dad, for god sakes, you'd give your daughter both your kindeys if she needed them." "You're doing your best, that's all you can do, Eds." "If you really don't wanna be like Sonia, all you gotta do is listen. That's it.". But Eddie still feels like shit about how he's raising Sophia, espcially because all of her teacher hate him and love Bev for some reason. Sometimes he will feel so bad about his own parenting that he will become to reliant on having Bev talk to her "woman to woman" when really he should be comforting her. Bev puts it very aptly by saying "I don't mind helping you raise her Eddie, and I also don't mind giving you advice on girl troubles, but she's your daughter, not mine. Who do you honestly think she wants to hear from right now?".

All the single parent angst aside though, this au is still pretty silly and light hearted at times. Bev and Eddie are CONSTANTLY mistaken for a married couple, even though they clarify over and over again that they're just friends who live together. Sometimes Bev and Eddie even get into a little playful contests about who's kid is worse "My daughter got sent home early cause she threatened to hit a girl" "Mine got a bucket stuck on his head this morning and i had to saw it off". I imagine Bev and Eddie also don't get out much anymore or have any real social lives these days, so the very first time they have a night to themselves without their kids they get high together and talk about their kids some more while they cry and eat junkfood. Sometimes they'll catch themselves getting way too excited about like... water filters and scrub brushes, and they suddenly realize that they're old as fuck and need to get out more.

Also even though Sophia and her dad clash on lots of things and she thinks Richie is a "total weirdo" she can tell he's in love with her dad and that his dad really likes him back, so she enjoys playfully teasing them both about it. The average sophia and Richie conversation is basically "I know you're scared my dad doesn't like you, but you shouldn't be. He does, he thinks your butts cute and that you're really funny." "Your dad thinks i'm funny!?". On the off chance that Richie and Bev go on a date with Eddie and Ben, i just imagine it's mostly a comedy of errors while Eddie and Bev act like hot messes the whole time. Bev shows up late with one of her heels snapped off and looking like a total mess to go in a fancy restaurant, while Eddie screams at some lady who cuts him and Richie off in traffic. Eddie and Richie never even get out of the car while Bev and Ben basically just walk around the city since she doesn't look nice enough to go in the restaurant now.

[noses-in-winter]

Jack of All Clits (f/f, nsfw, sneezy lesbian porn cranked up SUPER high)

idk what it is but lately I have been INCAPABLE of writing anything that didn't involve a curvy girl sneezing, receiving sapphic head, and climaxing within a few hundred words of each other. This fic just happens to have all of that! Piper's my horny and perpetually stoned bisexual dumbass and Tourm is @virarushi's hot thicc girlboss gnome OC who sneezes about everything and has not yet had her bi awakening! Tourm is 4'5 and Piper's 5'6 so that's fun. :) Here's some art of her because she's hot! Anyway, to summarize: This is a 2.5k word fic in which Piper's going down on Tourm while she sneezes. They're roommates in grad school and Piper prides herself on being able to deliver bi awakenings.

To reiterate: this is nsfw so please do not interact if you're underage!! just block me!! thanks!! okay enjoooyyyyy ty

(Also to my awesome friends who read this in Discord, I DID add a few more horny details, just sayyin...okay anyway tyyy)

Piper was pretty sure Tourm had never climaxed at the hands (or dick, or mouth, or any combo of those things) of another sentient being. Based on what Piper had learned about her new roommate so far (mostly from asking Alexander), college was the first chance Tourm had ever really had to be away from her family’s rigid expectations and watchful eye. The poor bitch hadn’t ever even had her boob squeezed before! And there was a lotta boob-squeezing real estate there!

Tourm’s lack of preconceived expectations made Piper’s job all the easier. Not that she didn’t like a challenge, of course. But, now she could put all her focus into just getting Tourm to--

“Haah--! F-Fuuuuuuucking Void, Pipes…”

--moan, even if it was not done with near the amount of volume that Piper had anticipated. She expected Tourm’s--

“Mmmhhmm--!” 

--sounds of pleasure to be just as loud and take-charge as her sounds of laughter, anger and annoyance. As Piper had quickly figured out, Tourm was not a throw her head back and cry out with every rock of her hips kind of girl. Would have been hot if she was! But Piper also liked Tourm’s brand of quivering through the arousal, letting out steady moans that evidently came right from the g-spot. That was…actually a lot hotter than the first option. Piper didn’t have to keep an ear out for anyone drawing closer to their room. She could just keep making Tourm squirm. 

“Mmmmhfhhh, fuck. Aah--!”

And, Christ, was it fun to make her squirm.

“Mmmn…MMhmm…Fuck,” Tourm exhaled audibly in a proper English accent that could rival Solara’s. Piper didn’t tease her about it the way she normally might. She simply focused on keeping this pelvis-rolling rhythm going. Piper would have commended Tourm for figuring out the desired beat of her drum, were her tongue not occupied with the shorter coed’s labia. With Tourm’s calves draped over Piper’s shoulders and her hips angled upward, Piper went down on her in a very literal sense. Coupled with two pillows beneath the small of Tourm's back to keep her sex elevated, it made quite the memorable impact. It was Piper's go-to move when someone neeeeeded a good mouthfucking the way Tourm did. Piper prided herself on being able to get hookups to forget aaaaall about sheltered upbringings and disappointed families with the use of her nuclear-powered tongue work. 

Piper’s eyes flickered over to her phone, propped up on Tourm’s bedside table. The stopwatch read: Six minutes and fifteen seconds…sixteen…seventeen…Shit! She was running out of time. Time to pull out the big guns.

Thus far, Piper had been using the tip of her tongue to tease at Tourm’s g-spot. As Tourm evidently grew closer and closer to completion, Piper opted to switch things up a bit. She eased her tongue in farther, just enough to rub the stud of her piercing against the roof of Tourm’s cunt. The warm skin of her g-spot was raised, more than already activated with sensitivity and arousal. Judging by the new way Tourm’s thighs trembled around Piper’s ears, the move felt just as good between her legs as she had hoped. 

Tourm breathed heavily, one hand gripping the blankets beneath her while the other had her fingers tangled in Piper’s hair. She continued to groove against her roommate’s tongue in whatever way she could. “ohhh--ohhhFUUuuuuck, Pi---hi-hhh--?”

Piper wasn’t exactly sure what set Tourm off. Most likely, it was just the fact that Tourm was a gnome that simply existed. No matter the cause of the evident irritation in her nose, the first snag of Tourm’s breath sounded confused, as if she hadn’t realized this was coming. Her voice went a touch high with desperation as her nostrils flared, and then rested again, and then repeated the process to the same beat that she panted in. 

Tourm was sure gearing up for one hell of a sneeze that didn’t seem like there was going to be any attempted cover in sight. Piper couldn’t blame her. She was sure that being eaten out was the only thought and feeling and need in Tourm’s head at the moment. 

Tourm’s budding sneezes had her breath seesawing on beat with Piper’s tongue work urging her into the mattress. Finally, Tourm’s whole cunt clenched around Piper’s tongue as she sneezed at last, a cute “hh’chisshiew!” that Piper was more than used to hearing, along with the seeeeveral that always followed. The release peppered her shirt, bare thighs aaaand Piper with the results. Piper made a little noise of surprise when Tourm, fingers still wound in her hair, wound up pushing her face further against her sex. Immediately, Tourm let out a congested little moan, pelvis rising without her control in an effort to receive more and more and more of Piper’s tongue as she geared up for the next sneeze.

 Piper was happy to keep up, but withdrew from Tourm’s sex for just a moment. “Bless you. Sneeze all you need, babes, okay? Just aim somewhere that’s not me,” she teased lightheartedly.

Tourm took in another fluttery sniffle with a dazed nod, unable to offer even half a joking response. She just barely managed to pull the collar of her oversized sleep shirt over her nose with clumsy fingers as she drew closer— 

“hhih!”

 — and closer--

 “h-hehh—!”

 —to sneezing again. 

“hhhh!’chzsshiew!”

After several moments spent in limbo, Tourm’s hips bucked with yet another sneeze. By the sounds of things, this one came with a deluge of mess that was contained to her shirt. She let out a congested exhale that immediately turned into another heady snag of her breath that led to Tourm sneezing twice more. “sszsschiew--adt’chzsschiew!”

Piper opted to take this opportunity to use her thumbs to ease up the delicate hood that protected Tourm’s clit. Piper dipped her head down to greet it with her lips.  “Good giiiiiirl,” she hummed, voice shifting into a little purr as she praised Tourm’s last-minute success of covering her nose as Piper had instructed. “Bless you…”

Tourm gave a close-mouthed little sound of pleasure that could certainly be described as a whimper. Piper couldn’t tell if that was simply out of the stimulation she had been experiencing for the past (one more glance at the stopwatch) seven minutes and thirty-four seconds, or if that praise had done something hot to her. That could be figured out later. Just a little over two minutes left for Piper to push Tourm over the edge of climax. She could so goddamn do this. 

Tourm sniffled heavily with a murmur that probably had some intelligent meaning behind it, but only sounded like horny gibberish to Piper. The self-proclaimed master of orgasms didn’t ruminate on it long. Through the blond curls between Tourm’s legs, Piper took her clit fully between her lips to suck at. She wasn’t surprised by Tourm’s immediate gasp in response, or the needy buck of her pelvis. Tourm moaned through the fabric of her sleep shirt that she had less and less of a hold on as Piper rocked against her rhythmically with every sneeze…

“chissch!”

 And sneeze. 

“ischhoo!”

And a few more sneezes after that.

“iht’chisshiew! F-fucki’g shi--hihh!—kisschiew! hadt’DJISHiew!”

 Each time she geared up for a new sneeze, Tourm’s back arched up from the bed in a desperate squirm before making her buckle again in what looked like the world’s most effective ab workout. Those sneezes were rapidly starting to get away from her. 

“I’m…” Tourm trailed off, dropping her hand from its place of holding her sleep shirt. She instead used both hands to grip the blankets beneath her. Her shirt remained tented, held up only by her nose. That would be changing once she got a few more sneezes out, Piper was sure. Tourm was no longer capable of giving a fuck about a single thing other than her body’s powerful and simultaneous urges to climax and sneeze, sneeze and climax. “I’m g—gonna …hohhhh, fuuuuck….”

“Gonna what, babe?” Piper hummed during a brief pause in her stimulating efforts. “Cum? Or sneeze?”

Tourm gave one shallow nod, evidently an answer to both. Even though the bottom half of her face was covered by her sleep shirt, Piper could see that next sneeze coming from a mile away. Canted eyebrows, a shuddering inhale, the brief, sudden stillness of Tourm’s legs draped over Piper’s shoulders--

Haaaht--?!”

Oh, this was gonna be messy--

“CHIZSCCHhoo!”

Tourm sneezed. Productively, if the sudden splatter of wetness from the inside of her top gave any indication. Dampness bled through the cotton, turning the plain heather gray t-shirt into more of a slate color in several spots. Tourm snuffled and got a fistful of the shirt, drawing it up to scrub at her itchy nostrils. Piper could only see the underside of Tourm’s tits shifting, quivering along to the movement of the rest of her body, as well as the unsteady rise and fall of her chest. Piper didn’t bless her this time, simply choosing to hum as she tended to Tourm’s clit. This felt nice, apparently, judging by the shivering clench of Tourm’s thighs. Piper needed no further encouragement to keep humming and teasing and sucking until Tourm’s head pressed back into her pillow. The tip of her nose was perfectly perpendicular with the ceiling, reddened nostrils flaring as she came--

“OhhHHHHFFFffuuucuuuccckkkk….”

--hard with a shuddering moan that squeezed Piper’s ears between her thighs. Fuck yeah! She was so gonna win---

Nope. Ten minutes and twenty-eight seconds. Fuck! So close! Piper had nothing to complain about, though. That was fun. And hot. Super, actually fucking hot.

 Unable to properly tend to her clit anymore with how tightly Tourm’s thighs held her, Piper instead moved back down to Tourm’s labia. She delivered a few finalizing strokes with her tongue to Tourm’s heated sex as it pulsed rhythmically with the highs of orgasm. Tourm was quiet for several moments as she collected herself, save for heavy inhales and exhales, before she let out a little noise that sounded like a cross between a moan and a laugh once Piper’s tongue piercing massaged along her…shit, what was that part called? Her fourchette? Something French, Piper remembered, but she didn’t spend long on remembering the name. She simply continued with her tongue’s easy kneading of this evidently pleasurable (and ticklish) spot.

Tourm slowly untensed, legs remaining draped over Piper’s shoulders. Her hips continued to move lazily in response to the stimulation of her fourchette, but in a more relaxed way that suggested she was simply enjoying this little pleasure, even if she was still too sensitive to achieve orgasm again. She sniffled, palming the underside of her overstimulated nose. “Okay…Fuck. I gotta give it to you, Twintails. That…wasn’t bad,” Tourm chuckled, her accent slowly shifting back to that Cockney she always aimed for. She sniffled again, reaching for the box of Kleenex on the nightstand. She drew it closer to her, setting the box on the comforter as she plucked out several tissues. “Guess you’re--sdf! Good at more than just settin’ shit on fire and annoyin’ Moseley with me.” 

Tourm buried her nose into the tissues and delivered the first few seconds of a hardy blow before she was interrupted by another sneeze. Ope--and then two more. Piper gave Tourm’s sex one last parting little lick before easing back, wiping her mouth (and cheeks…and chin...and nose…Jesus, Tourm had been soaked) on her sleeve. She stood, easing Tourm’s legs down from their resting place on her shoulders to retrieve her phone from the nightstand.

 Tourm sniffled into her now-useless tissues, looking up at Piper with cracked, teary eyes. “I win?” she asked with a smirk that promptly collapsed into a sneezy snarl--

“adt'IZSSCHSHuh!”

-- that resulted in another heavy sneeze all down her shirt. Tourm grimaced, making a little noise of disgust as she moved to a sitting position and saw just how thoroughly peppered with sneezes both the inside and outside of her shirt were. “Eugh. Gross.” 

Piper snorted with a little smirk of her own as she started for Tourm’s dresser. “Bless y--”

“’chzsshiew!”

Piper gave an impressed whistle as she opened the top drawer, rifling through Tourm’s various shirts. She didn’t look at Tourm just yet, but it was audible in that grumbled snuffling that that sneeze hadn’t been pretty. Piper couldn’t help an amused little smile to herself as she picked out a new top for Tourm. She unfolded it, giving the garment only a brief look before shaking her head and beginning to fold it again. Way too tight for comfortable sleep. Piper did like this shirt, though. If her tits were half as impressive as Tourm’s, she would have been wearing it every other day. “Bless you, infinity. Get ‘em out, babe.” 

Tourm snorted ticklishly, knuckling at one nostril through her bundle of tissues. She blew her nose and actually managed to finish without being interrupted by a sneeze. “So?” she asked with an amused smirk in her voice. “I won, right?”

Piper rolled her eyes fondly, examining another shirt. Nope. Fabric was way too thin for a chilly April night like this. “Fiiiine. Yeah. Just by, like, twenty seconds, though. I’m sure I would have made it without those several sneezy disruptions, but I’m no sore loser.”

“Hah!” came Tourm’s little snicker. “You owe me fift--sdff! Ugh…F-fihh--hihh! I--”

Tourm sneezed behind Piper’s back, another productive sound that had her groaning again in the aftermath. Once Piper turned back around, a perfect sleep shirt in hand, Tourm was already pulling her messy top off. She removed her shirt the way a guy might, Piper noticed, pulling it up from the back. She wiped her nose with it before giving it a lazy toss to the carpet. Tourm leaned back slightly in bed, supporting herself with both hands as she sniffled. Piper, the slut she was, could do absolutely nothing but stare at the way the evidence of all of those sneezes just made Tourm’s tits shimmer in the lamplight. And then how they--

“Hhh--! hadt’DJISHiew!”

--bounced with another heady, uncovered sneeze that simply provided the same glitter-esque shine to her chest. She let out a stuffy exhale in the aftermath that sent a bolt of horny lightning down Piper’s spine. That…really had sounded like another moan, hadn’t it?

Damn it. She wanted to make her moan again. 

“Double or nothing.” 

Tourm looked at her with a cocked eyebrow, tits settling after that shivery sneeze. “Huh?” Piper didn’t even hand Tourm the new top, simply tossing it to a cluttered desk. She made her way back to Tourm’s bed and took her by the bicep with one hand lightly enough that Tourm could move away if she wasn’t into it. “Lemme try again,” she said, more of a command than a request. “Double or nothing if I can do it in eight.” 

Judging by Tourm’s expression, she very much was into this. Piper took this as a cue to ease her free hand to cup Tourm’s warm, damp tit. Tourm evidently couldn’t help a quivering little exhale, lashes fluttering as Piper thumbed her nipple. Just as Piper would expect her to, though, Tourm immediately shifted her look into one of cockiness rather than the evident need that was there.  “You’re on.”

[youremyheaven]

on the topic of malefics and sensuality, i'm martian and unsurprisingly celibate. but one thing that i think is unique to martian celibacy is hating men and let me tell you... i sure do 😭 i've had a few experiences as a teen that were like okay at best but as i've gotten older i find men so disgusting and stupid and quite frankly sinister that i just cannot bring myself to even flirt with them. i think there probably is a man out there who won't make me feel this way (venusian munch man if you can hear me please save me) but in the meantime me and my misandrist martian friends (i'm like a mars magnet) are gonna be locked UP

and also, i have mrigashira moon and i think that mrigashira specifically makes you fantasize about romance/sex a lot but not wanting to actually do it. my mrig rising and venus friend feels the same way! we both spent our teen years on wattpad 24/7 😭 mrigs love escapism and fantasy!

omg BBG you spilled 💅🏼

I've noticed the man hating tendency with many Martian women lmaooo, everytime I hear it, I do feel a bit shook ngl, it's like Saturn men hating women

Venusian man save me is so realllll 😩😩😭🤣

Honorable mention for Jupiter men (esp Vishaka) they're the sweetest guys except they're kinda sexless (except Vishaka) they're romantic but not sexual??? If that makes sense??

My friend dated a Vishaka Moon man for a year and he apparently never ever touched her 😭😭😭and she thought it was because he found her unappealing lmao (dating within the Indian context means a man who doesn't touch before marriage is a good man etc so she felt too "slutty" to ask him for anything bc most men are sleazy and would've tried to pull something and him not doing so meant he was a decent guy and she was the problem 💀🤡)

I'd say Venus & Jupiter men are the ones who know how to treat women right 😌😉 (obviously how evolved they're as individuals also matter, there are sex addicted Venusians and party everyday, constant thrill chasing Jupitereans)

Lmaoo the Mrigashira fantasizing about sex and never actually wanting to do the deed is so true. My 60yr old aunt (Mrigashira Moon) has been separated from her husband for like 20 years (and she's thrived as a girlboss ever since) and she often talks about finding a handsome man etc 😌😏🤤 for her company but when my dad says "okay let's try matrimonial sites and find a guy for you 😌🫶🏼" she's like "🤮🤢🤢EWWW"

A gang of Martian misandrists is so funny 😭🤣😳😶‍🌫️💀🤣😭 I feel like Martian women are so unimpressed with me bc I seem like a deranged lover girl to them lmao,, my friend in college had Mars in Mrigashira atmakaraka and she literally acted like my mom and shooed away any man who approached me (since many of them were creepy, I was grateful for it ngl) but the WAYYY she spoke about guys always felt a bit unhinged to me like ??? it can't be normal to walk around with this much rage and angst ??? And I always tried to gauge if there was something in her past that made her this way 😔😶‍🌫️😶 but girlie never dated, never had a crush, never went near a man, was never assaulted/harassed/abused by men etc so I figured it must just be a hating Indian men thing bc who can blame her for that 😔🤡💀she did however feel like her dad was a patriarch with a misogyny issue but that's just every brown dad tbh :/// everytime I told her about a crush or about something some guy told me 🤪😜, she'd start the character assassination on him and make him sound like the worst person to have ever lived ,, and then lowkey make snide remarks that made me feel stupid for having my moment of fun😔like damn ma chill outtttt, I'm not having his babies!!!! We had a very homoerotic friendship so I feel like there's that as well 😬😶‍🌫️😬

[akajustmerry]

I haven't seen chibnall but I have a hard time imagining being worse than moffat. I'm sure it's possible but that man... he was bad. also out of curiosity what's the problem with eccleston? or did you just use his name as a reference for which era was rtd. feel free to ignore this if you like, I hope you have a good day!

hellooo!

look, you won't hear me arguing moffat wasn't bad but believe me Chibnall was worse. He wrote an entire sequence where the Doctor tricks the Master (then played by British-Indian actor Sacha Dhawan) into being caught by the Nazis, knowing what the Nazis would do to him. Like, the Doctor, presenting as a white woman, handed over the Master, her best friend presenting as a Brown man to the most notorious white supremacist regimes in history. And that moment was framed as a successful ploy!! As a "win" for the Doctor.

I'm sorry but, to me, Moffats fucking decrepit cringe Gen X Misogyny did nowhere near as much damage as thoughtlessly portraying the Doctor as someone who will literally use Nazism against a poc and framing it as clever girlboss behaviour. Like, it's not fun that these are the people we have to choose from but one of these things is not like the other.

As for the Eccleston stuff, I was referring to Christopher Eccleston's conflict with the BBC and by extension implied conflict with RTD. The full details of the conflict have never been fully made public but Eccleston has always maintained he quit the show due to the culture created by the show runners and producers. He's said he'd never work with RTD again. Eccleston implied that one of the reasons the relationship between himself and RTD broke down was Eccleston's desire for the Doctor to be a role model whose intellect wasn't inherently tied to being upper class English and had to really fight to use his natural accent. It's worth noting that the we wouldn't have a Doctor without an RP (received pronunciation) accent again until Capaldi. David even mentioned Russell's "enthusiasm" for DT to speak in RP not his natural accent in his interview with Jodie in 2020.

I want to believe that RTD has grown since the mid 00s, and perhaps this time around things will be different. But I think a lot of people point to Moffat as the worst because his bigotry is the most visible and easiest to critique. It's more popular and acceptable to critique sexism against white women than it is to critique racism and classism. But in reality all of these showrunners are white British men who have pulled white British bullshit and I won't stand for Chibnall and Davies shortcomings being scapegoated via Moffat.

Also, this is not a defense necessarily but a lot of people who hate moffat era who did NOT watch Capaldi's seasons and did not watch season 10 with Bill Potts. So their critique often lacks the perspective of Moffat's best season that proves he's capable of writing something genuinely compelling that's not gross and sexiest. Like it genuinely infuriates me when people talk about "moffat who" but they're only really talking about Matt Smiths seasons. Again none of that is a defence but it's just to say that most people who say Moffat is the worst are people who a) are really talking about Sherlock, which, fair enough that was shit b) people who just think 10th Doctor best Doctor and don't actually care about anything after that era in any meaningful way. Or c) people who have a pretty incomplete view of the series was and where it currently is.

omg this is long sorry I hope I don't sound rude I'm not trying to be I just have so many thoughts about this. I hope this answers your question, please let me know if I need to clarify anything <3

[gaslightgatekeepgirlbosscombat]

Group B, Round 5

Propaganda under the cut

Starscream

This mf is THE gaslight gatekeep girlboss of Transformers. He manipulates EVERYONE he can and is constantly trying to kill his boss to take his position. He has probably tried to literally gaslight someone before I'm sure, there's a lot of versions of him and they have different levels of fuckery but they're all A Bitch (affectionate). He's also tried to kill a bunch of people so you could say he's trying to gatekeep being alive. He also has an exclusive crew in a few different continuities that he has high standards for

Every 5 seconds he's trying to assassinate Megatron and declare himself leader, lied to everyone about succeeding, actually succeeded, became immortal, is the queerest transformer (which is saying a lot bc they're all really gay) and has high heels. Also I think it would be really funny and there are exactly 0 tf fans who would object to him being in this.

Kim Wexler

absolute master scammer and "HE ASKED FOR NO PICKLES" gf. very bold and talented lawyer also

she literally roofied her ex boss and stole his car to spice up her sex life. she told a cartel boss to get his shit together. she was gonna kill a man for her husband. she snuck contraband into federal prison for him

kim is clinically insane and gaslights the ever-loving shit out of multiple people over the course of bcs. she’s a con artist baby!! yet she gatekeeps the scamming industry to keep out criminals she feels morally superior to. she’s a scarily hyper-efficient girlboss as well. in fact she girlbossed so hard she quit 2 separate high-paying jobs because she hated being told what to do that much. then she ruined her former boss’s life for $2M and because it made her horny. no one else does it like her and frankly no one should

[hils79]

Hils Watches Mysterious Lotus Casebook - Ep 38

I'm quite tired after a day of adventuring but @dancing-out-in-space and @hphaeton said this is a good episode and I deserve a treat on my birthday so let's do this :D

Yeah, girlboss your way into world domination with your enslaved malewife

I mean everyone else in this seems to be poly. Why don't you marry Di Feisheng and have Li Lianhua as your concubine

Uh...holy shit?

Is he going to rescue Di Feisheng?? :D :D :D

Di Feisheng: refuses speak or even to even open his eyes to look at Jiao Liqiao even after she stabs him Jiao Liqiao: Oh, btw, Li Xiangyi is also locked up here Di Feisheng: bitch, I will kill you

"Are you enjoying me chained up, bloody and sweaty?" Love that he knows Li Lianhua is there even though Di Feisheng has his eyes closed and Li Lianhua is hiding around a corner behind a screen.

Please say 'I'd rather have you'

They're going to hide...in the wedding chamber...

They're hiding in the wedding chamber and they're both in their underwear. I mean I know Di Feisheng can barely move but still!

Di Feisheng: There's a high probability that what I'm about to do will kill me Li Lianhua: How dare! I just saved you!

I am having a lot of feelings about the fact that Di Feisheng gave his energy to Li Lianhua and now Li Lianhua is returning the favour. They are inside each other now.

I don't think I have ever seen either of them smile and laugh so openly like this. I need to go and lie down.

IN A BRIDAL CHAMBER NO LESS! I'm fine. Also, I love that they have somehow managed to find clothes in their exact size and individual styles

There's only one bed. Just saying.

Dude you literally just had a moment about stopping challenging him to a fight

Are they seriously pausing their romantic alone time IN THE BRIDAL CHAMBER to solve a mystery

Oh no! I love him.

XIAOBAO IS HERE TO SAVE HIS MAN

DAMN SON

I mean every time he did anything you accused him of being evil again but yes you were right about him

The OT3 is a proper OT3 now with no hidden agendas or secrets between then. And I think Li Lianhua and Di Feisheng got re-married so that's cool.

[osamucide]

since im so eternally tunnelvisioned on self shipping and also a little of an astrology freak im just thinking about me and f/os zodiac signs

me and dazai.........cancer and gemini.........like this should be a match made in hell actually. id be like please god what did i do wrong in my life to be cursed with a gemini husband. there would need to be so much evolving and understanding between us for this to work like i love him so much but i just know he calls me an overemotional bitch and i lecture him CONSTANTLY about how he needs to quit intellectuallizing his suffering (and we’re both hypocrites)

me and ryuunosuke are actually the match made in heaven because cancer and pisces???? PLEASE if he didnt maybe have some staunch ass air/earth in his big three contributing to what a shy, hardass mfker he is we'd be making out in public probably. to be half of a water sign couple is actually my dream lmfao

fun fact actually really sad fact atsushi shares a birthday with my ex LMAO and you know what it was a good relationship ANYWAYS! i love a taurus. i think they're a lot more unpredictable and fun than people give them credit for. like he probably only wants to go to the clerb once every couple months but when we do we go hard yanno

and OF COURSE gojo is a sagittarius and when i tell u i am so surrounded by sagittarius in my life and they are some of my favorite people. shares in my delusion when appropriate and then gives it to me straight when i really need to hear it. i can keep up with their party but then encourage them to be responsible and practice self compassion when it's needed. i just always strike such awesome balances with sags

me and nanashoko is just insane because you have two simp cancer men and their baddie scorpio lady. literally just two malewifes and our girlboss. so much intensity between cancer and scorp and so much tenderness between two cancers and all of it just wrapped up into this. it's simple she's bad af and we kiss the ground she walks on

[lizzardwitch]

Ship Bingo: Heckyl/Kendall

Milk I think you and I know damn well what kind of monster you unleashed with this ask

Unsurprisingly, they've hit two bingos

I've made my adoration for this pairing ABUNDANTLY clear on my blog and anyone who knows me in relation to PR knows that they're my absolute favorite ship franchise-wide (and on my top 10 for favorite pairings in media ever). From the moment they had their first scene together (back when I was only 9 years old) I was immediately in love with them and wanted to see them together by the end. And through all of it, through all the flirting, heartbreak, longing to see the other again, they came back together and he joined the fight not just out of a genuine desire to be good, but for her sake because he felt so compelled to protect her when she needed it. And she believed in his good heart even after he betrayed her with the hope that he would realize it, if these two ain't loyal idk what loyalty is tbh

Also I'm a sucker for ANY nerdy, emotionally stunted brunette and her goofy ass boyfriend, purple good girl/blue redeemed villain, height difference, ISTJ/ENFP, girlboss/boyfailure simp, and snarky brunette/goofy humanoid alien pairings so these two are an automatic number one. Literally everything I want in a relationship (alongside my other OTPs)

There is quite literally no way I can pour all my veneration, fondness, and admiration for this ship into words that can even remotely convey the depths of it all, but this is my 'across time and space, I will always find you' pairing, my PR Roman Empire (next to Fran & RJ) when it comes to shipping, they are literally my everything, forever and always <3333 I've been in love with them for 8-9 years and it shows no signs of stopping any time soon

(Also one of my mutuals came up with the ship name 'Space Geek' for them and that's absolutely amazing and I use that too)

Send me a ship for the ship bingo!!!

[victimsofyaoipoll]

Round 1

Propaganda Under Cut

Safu

I am adding my vote because the yaoi may be canon in this one but Safu is still Shion's best friend and the way ppl leave her out of stuff sucks ass. Her character development was the ONE thing the anime had over the novels and manga but even the anime only fans won't look at her. She literally said "I want your sperm" out loud with her mouth in a train station to ask her best friend to date her. Weird girl extraordinaire who became bee jesus people need to stop sleeping on her for the guys.

She has a crush on Shion and makes it quite known She also asked for Shion's semen once

Neurodivergent queen! She autismed her way through puberty so hard, she thought her feelings for the protagonist Shion were purely sexual, until she spent time away from him to grow as a person

Annabeth Chase

I feel like fandom is kinda split on her with percabeth shippers loving her but any m/m shipper I've seen does not like her, really. She is my bae tho <3

Percabeth antis grind my gears so much because they never hate Percy, nono, even though he's arguably done more questionable stuff than Annabeth. Not everyone who hates her is doing so because of a mlm ship— the Perachel stans claim that Annabeth is a misogynist. However, basically everyone that isn't trying to ship her boyfriend with Rachel is trying to ship him with Jason, Nico, or her old friend Luke. They make her out to be this horrible abusive girlboss(derogatory) that she's simply... not. She doesn't insult Percy for having ADHD just because she's highly intelligent. She doesn't physically abuse him, and doesn't lay a finger on him outside of training. She's really devoted to him in a non-anti-feminist way. They just hate her for 'getting in the way' of Nico's convoluted attraction to Percy, or Jason's close friendship with him, or Luke's rivalry with him. But those relationships all flourish the way they were intended by the author: non-romantically. It's not Annabeth's fault for being intelligent or capable or jokingly snide or determined or any of those non-stereotypically-feminine qualities. She's just out here existing and people hate her for not being a man. Sorry for the rant.

She's canonically in a relationship with Percy Jackson for most of the books they're in, but he often gets paired in canon with other male characters, such as Nico di Angelo or Jason Grace. In fan fiction (especially yaoi focused ones) she's characterized as being a stuck up know it all, but she gets into plenty of shenanigans in canon and can be pretty goofy and sweet!

I think I may have accidently used fanart for Annabeth's picture, if you have official art of her, send it in!