#so that’s what’s going on there

[gatorinator]

Ok the parody book covers had me rolling, and I was delighted to get snippets from two of them on the website. Sadly (although also probably luckily) I’m not sure they did one for the Book of Mormon parody

Again, probably for the best. But as someone who is LDS, and who has read the Book of Mormon extensively, I figured I’d take a crack at a snippet of what could be in this version of the Book of Bill.

3 Bill

Chapter 5

Followers of Cypher call themselves the Anti-Bill-Cyphies—They are commanded to build a portal— A man like the cedars of Lebanon breaks the portal—Cypher causes a famine on purpose not by accident—Those who intercourse around will find out. About 2084 B.W. (Before Weirdmageddon).

1 And it came to pass that in those days, the followers of Cypher did go forth unto the land, to build a portal.

2 And they called themselves the Anti-Bill-Cyphies, for they were the followers of Cypher.

3 And it came to pass that I, Cypher, spake unto them, saying, Hey idiots! Wanna have the time of your lives? Why don’t you take a crack at portal building? I’ll make you rich and famous, all the babes will love you! Their feet are gonna be tinkling with sooo many bells, you guys are into that right?

4 And they built a portal after the manner in which I showed them, which was sick as hell.

5 And they did pray unto me, saying O Cypher, we know that thou art a god, and we know that thou art the sickest god, and whatsoever that means we know not, but we do believe it.

6 And it came to pass that there was a twerp, who was like unto the cedar trees of Lebanon, who did come. And in the night, he snuck into the portal, and verily he did take a big old stick and bash it to pieces.

7 And on the next day, when I saw what he hath done, I did not throw a big tantrum, don’t believe what hath been written. I remained very calm and collected, and then caused every animal in the vicinity to lose their teeth. And thus the animals couldn’t eat, and a famine came about the land, which was totally what I meant to have happen.

8 Yea, and even the man like unto the cedars of Lebanon starved to death, THAT WILL SHOW HIM. And thus we see that those who fornicate about, will thusly figure out. Amen.

[itsscaredycat]

so ok yeah fine i watched gravity falls again and read the book of bill

[riacte]

not romantic not platonic but a secret third thing [what would happen between earth and the moon if the earth stopped spinning as illustrated by xkcd randall munroe]

[cowboysmp3]

there’s something sooo sickening about how dunmeshis whole energy is like sometimes something terrible and awful happens to you and it changes you forever and nothing can make you the person you were before but there’s still love and there’s still sharing a meal together and there’s still living

[perrieedwards]

i feel like people are skimming over the uk riots in a way that makes me want to tear my hair out. muslims in the uk are in active danger. immigrants in the uk are in active danger. refugees in the uk are in active danger. people of colour in the uk are in active danger. asian communities in the uk are in active danger. black communities in the uk are in active danger.

there are massive far right riots throughout the country right now and people like fucking elon musk and nigel farage are inciting it and still have a platform to speak. people have used three young girls deaths, people's genuine grief in southport, to try and gain traction for their own racist bullshit and it's working.

a lot of refugee charities have been forced to close leaving many people without support, homes, funding, food, etc. if you aren't able to donate please consider sending a message via the conversation over borders campaign! it will send a hopeful, welcoming letter to a refugee in the uk. there is also a guide to staying safe here.

please do your own research and donate to refugee charities, anti-islamophobia charities, mosques who are trying to rebuild after being destroyed, counter protesters, here are some i've heard positive things about but the list is extensive; southport strong together (support for the southport victims and their families), southport mosque rebuilding, riot repair fund, middlesbrough vulnerable residents, nasir mosque rebuilding, hull help for refugees, bristol welcomes migrants,

[frankierotwinkdeath]

Y’all want Taylor Swift to be gay so bad but you won’t even write femslash about her

[obsob]

i am a being capable of immeasurable love and whimsy

[vaperarmand]

hey guys if you’re planning on making a vaguepost on the dashboard can you message me with the details and some of the lore behind the vague post you’re making. a vaguepost for the dash and a detailedpost for me. because i like to know what’s going on. if you do this i will automatically take your side because you’ve done the right thing by letting me know what’s up. thanks in advance ❤️

[foccaccia]

the worst part about being an adult is thay its no longer socially acceptable to just roll down a really big hill and then run back up it and roll back down again. "oh is this a syphilis metaphor" passerby would ask. "is this for a tick tock". no i just wanna come home covered in dirt and scratches and bask in the the solace of childlike mirth

[lizzibennet]

chappell roan’s got this sudden very huge burst of attention and since then she has

shown up to jimmy fallon in full drag

shown up to her concerts in even zainier outfits than before

worn a nun costume to one concert and when people were uncomfortable she was like good. toodles!

very clearly stated she will retreat from the public eye if she feels threatened by her fame

put very firm boundaries in place, not caring how that might make her look in today’s ass backward society that thinks artists owe everyone everything

she really is trying the hardest to do this in her own terms, in this industry that pretty much allows no wiggle room when it comes to being as big as she’s gotten. it’s clear to me she doesn’t care about maintaining the level of notoriety she has now, she cares about connecting to the subset of people who her art has always been aimed at and that is it. and i find it so admirable! it must be really hard to get what every artists out there is trying to and not let yourself get influenced by it, but she is remaining steadfastly herself. it’s so refreshing and it makes me like her so much more

[julnites]

Red riding hood comic collab with the wonderful @yeehawpim (go check out their blog for loads of great comics!) 🌷 See the layouts he did here!

[hinamie]

to moving forward

[poorly-drawn-mdzs]

Must be a Sugondese joke.

[inkskinned]

the tradwife movement is the same as it has always been - back in the kitchen, back to breeding - it just has better branding.

when i was younger, i hated pink. i was not like other girls. this is now something i'm embarrassed of - this was not me being a "girl's girl."

but it was expressing something many of us felt at the time: i literally wasn't what girlhood was supposed to be. this is a hard thing to explain, but you know when you're not performing girlhood correctly. it isn't as easy as "i liked x when girls liked y" - because there were other girls that liked x, too - but i never figured out exactly the correct way to like x, or to be interested in y.

now there is the divine feminine. this is the same rhetoric it has always been: women are biologically driven to like pink and ribbons and submitting to our husbands.

the problem is that the patriarchy found a better PR team. because yes, actually, i want every woman to have the choice to be a homemaker. i also want her taken seriously for her legitimate home-making labor. i want her to be recognized as also having a job, just unpaid. i want men to have this opportunity, too.

but it is no longer "i made this choice and I love it." instead it is a sixteen-paragraph rant about how selfish it is that my generation isn't having kids. instead it's long videos about how if you feed your children processed foods, you're going to kill them. instead it is "this is what womanhood is supposed to be. i feel bad for any other choices you're making."

the shame spiral is just prettier. it is large houses devoid of personality. it is the implication: if you don't have this, you aren't happy. the solid, everlasting assurance: women are actually supposed to be submitting. this is the default. this is the natural state of things. all other attempts inflict suffering.

but you can no longer say i'm not like other girls. you can no longer reject this image completely. you cannot find it revolting, even if you know that the underbelly is toxic and festering. sure, it is the same repackaged patriarchy. but the internet does not have shades of grey. you should support and reward other women! your disgust is actually internalized misogyny. not because you are seeing a vision of yourself the way they're trying to train you to be. not because you feel her ghost pass within an inch of your earlobe. not because your father will eventually ask you - why can't you be like her?

because they figured out how to make it beautiful: women will sell other women on this idea, and we will find the singular loophole in feminism. sure, she's shaming you in most of her videos. sure, she implies that a different life is obscene. but she just wants you to be happy! you'd be happier if you were listening!

and the whole time you're sitting there thinking: i'd actually just be happier if i had that kind of money.

[slushy-sash]

what in the 4d chess are they playing 😭

[otto-doctavius]

snooooork mimimimimi