#so obviously this is something Vader needs to fix

[tennessoui]

I NEED an epilogue from Quinlans POV where he wakes in the cell like a day later to several droids escorting him to a ship. And he's like "Why are you letting me go???" And they just respond that it was Lord Vaders orders and also to pls tell the Council that Kenobi sends his regards as well as his resignation. Also Palpatine is Sidious.

ok but POV you’re Quinlan Vos and after years of lying to a lot of people and roughly a year of lying to one of your closest friends, the time comes where you KNOW you need to tell him the truth before he risks his life doing something stupid but there’s a pretty strong case to be made that what he’s doing is actually the right thing anyway, he’s just doing it for the wrong reasons and you have no idea what he’ll do if he does know and after so long lying it’s hard to tell the truth so instead you don��t and then you let him go and then he doesn’t return your comm messages and you know that means he’s been captured because you know the bad guy and you know that he’d definitely capture him given half the chance

so obviously you have to go get him and rescue him especially before the bad guy tells him the truth before you can because who knows how that would end or what the truth can sound like if it’s twisted up more than it already is

and then of course you get captured and then tortured for a little bit and it’s definitely personal and then some time later the bad guy comes to your cell and takes you to a new one with your friend in it because ? Vader thinks his new pet Jedi needs enrichment? he is acting weird and you are expected to fix this

and of course when you see your friend you finally tell him the truth because you need to because the worst has already happened and because you think the guilt would kill you if you didn’t

and your friend’s pretty angry for sure but then he gets taken away and then he doesn’t come back for ages and ages and then when he does he’s like practically holding hands with the bad guy and he looks so fucking familiar for the first time in years

and then they like. staple a note to your shirt and then knock you out and you wake up on your way back to coruscant and you’re alone which means your friend stayed with the bad guy and you’re not sure what that means but you think like…you tried your thing. maybe something else will work better

[evilminji]

I Am? Still? Thinking?? Of My Hive Mind Crechelings Au? (Prev <-)

The Creepy Crechelings? My Fuuuuckin POSSESSED Lil Babies (absolutely affectionate and full of love)?

I CAN'T STOP, man. It's the SOFTEST and WARMEST Epilog? Just... fuck, I wanna cry. It's SO FULL OF LIGHT? So content and happy and "then... our Hero gets to REST. No more struggle. No more pain. Just golden sweetness and simple days."???

The Tragedy Of Darth Vader WAS, ultimately, utterly and completely, because Anakin Skywalker was a GOOD MAN.

Because the Dark took something GOOD and twisted it. Made it MONSTROUS. Killing his soul with ten thousand cuts of doubt and fear. Anger, arrogance, and unwarranted pride. He had COMPASSION. So much love in him he could barely stand to BREATHE.

The world BURNED for how great his Empathy, made the weight of all the universe's suffering, upon his shoulders.

He was GOOD. Could STILL be good. And? The Force DOES work in mysterious ways. It just needs... an in. Someone, ANYONE, to ask the right question. At ANY point. Because it CAN NOT push upon them the answers. Fix for them all life's woes. The Force is not a God... it simple IS. And though it wishes to help, loves them dearly, it can only OFFER what is ASKED for.

And, yes, there are loopholes. Visions and gifts it might give. Technicalities it might work off of. That gut feeling? Well... your INSTINCTS want you to survive. Surely THEY are asking? Are they not? "How do we survive?" They ask. Endlessly. So the Force may answer.

And SURELY, The Force knows, the you of 20 seconds from now, would ASK them to warn you not to eat that fruit. It is poison. That is definitely in line with what you would ask! It can see it. Because Time is simultaneous to the Force. Why, it can even use this to justify, too itself, the Visions! SOMEONE is asking! It can even tell you whom! And when!

It WON'T.

But it COULD.

Yet! Let us focus! Anikin Skywalker!

Do YOU remember how he was born? Oh, sure, we are all PASSINGLY familiar. Born to Shmi Skywalker. "No Father". Etc etc? BUT!!! Details MATTER! And in science? In HEALTH? "Spontaneous Baby" is NOT GOOD ENOUGH.

How. What, SPECIFICALLY, made UP the spontaneous baby? From WHERE? Was it air? Energy? A clone? A hypothetical child of Shmi and some long dead individual she could not possibly have met?

These are important questions! Specifically, important to understand WHAT ANIKIN'S SPECIES IS. Cause "humanoid" is NOT a species! A race! Stewjoni and Naboolians are subtly different! Yes, both human variants. But that's the THING, isn't it?

They. Are. VARIANTS.

As in DIFFERENT. Divergent from one another. Perhaps not A LOT, but enough that their unique medical needs might be significant! Different environmental strains, different diets, different evolutionary paths for thousands of years. In SOME cases? They might no longer be COMPATIBLE anymore! Or barely! A tiger and a cat are both feline, but you'd be blind to mistake them as the same thing.

Then we have Anikin.

Who is haaaaalf??? What exactly?

Well, "The Force" according to research. By means of Sith meddling. But! And for the purpose of this ramble??

He is birth was "a work of the midi-chlorians".

.......let that sink in for a second. The Force channeling, HIVE MINDED, symbiotic micro organisms inside Shmi? Were instructed or guided to? Just take energy? Food and DNA. And... 3D print a baby into existence. They did, obviously, it was easy. But CONSIDER WHAT THAT MEANS.

It MEANS?

Anikin is HALF MIDI-CHLORIAN.

(At least in this AU.)

It's WHY he is so, SO fuckin desperate to connect. So ungodly powerful. So destabilized by not having "attachments". His brain is structured by organisms and half IS, of a sort, the sort of organism that REQUIRES an interconnected system. To offload the massive amount of sensory input the Force gives him. To regulate Big Emotions. To form councils and crunch through problems.

To get those good, good Soul Hugs.

Anikin? Not doing so hot. He's been SURROUNDED by what FEELS like a hive? But they keep EXCLUDING him and he doesn't have the words to explain why that upset him. Why he wants to crawl inside their brains an just... just hang. Not touch anything! Just... just nap! Maybe get a hug? P... Please?

Why does EVERYONE HATE HIM?!

But they don't. They just have different boundaries. Are NOT Hive Minds. THEIR Midi-chlorians? Are not at such a high concentration that it affects their thought patterns.

Unlike? The Creepy Crechelings.

Who absolutely doooooo. THEY are still in the We/Us phase. Boundaries? What Boundaries? We're crawling through each other's brains and on the ceiling! Full of light, love, and horrifying prophecy! Eating sand! Many thoughts, head full! We can taste TIME!!! :D

And it takes a SPECIAL breed of Creche Master with VERY strong shields to interact with them. Mind tricks are both accidental and daily. Poker face of kindness is a must. Good emotional regulation. So when one sees Anikin losing his shit again?

They sigh. Put down their muffin. And go deal with it.

Probably not even awake.

They just feel *Overwhelming Power* and hear upset noises and go "Ah, starting early, today is." Then wander over. And effortlessly defuse the situation. Flop their Force presence on Anikin like a weighted blanket. It would be UNSPEAKABLY rude and invasive to most anyone else? But Obi-Wan just...? Watchs his ex-padawan go BONELESS against this Crech Master he's never met? Like :O

T-teach me. Please, for the love of the Force, teach me to do that.

Next thing you know? They are talking, Obi-Wan getting a crash course in Super Powerful Younglings™ that honestly he should have gotten YEARS ago, but was run too ragged to. And Anikin? Blissed out, high as a kite, at the bottom of a Youngling pile. Mmmmm, lumpy pillow. We gonna sit and sleep and climb all over you, Master Skywalker.

*adoring, emotionally gooey voice* Okay.

He volunteers. Fuck it, he practically LIVES out of that Creche. Padme! Padme, we're adopting. He wants to be a stay at home dad. Build droids. Everything is Beautiful and nothing hurts. *war is still happening* ah. Shit. Right. THAT™.

Okay! New plan. AFTER the war. He has discovered his calling. Is suddenly bonding with Jedi he's never even talked to before. Is that Plo Koon? Plo! PLO! Hey, thanks for lending me that youngling development module! You got any others you recommend?

Him and Obi-Wan? Suddenly getting along better then they have in YEARS. His Master seems genuinely THRILLED he has a clear goal he's working towards and is supporting him ten thousand percent. Openly bragging. Consulting with him. AND? Is so much more OPEN! That Creche Master really helped him Understand how Anikin's brain works!

Which? Leads to Anikin getting healthier. More and more stable. The babies fuckin sneaking aboard. His Men LOSING THEIR SHIT because WHY ARE THERE TUBIES, SIR?! Babies! Infants! Smol, itty bitty, BABY CHILDS!!!???

And? On one hand? He has never felt so clear head and stable as when they are with him. Interconnected. US and WE and THE HIVE. The Force is With Us and We are The Force.

Buuuuuut on the OTHER hand? He is an adult. He CAN seperate what HE wants from what is good for his lil baby friends. This isn't safe. They could get HURT. Die! It... honestly? It makes him think about his mom a lot. He thinks he finally GETS it. Hates that he does. Is in AWE of how strong she was. Hopes he can take the lessons she taught him and live up to them.

Because it's not about what HE wants. It's about what's best for these kids.

They have to go back.

.....except the man he THOUGHT was his friend? THOUGHT was a GOOD MAN? Won't let them LEAVE THE FRONT LINES. Won't even authorize an emergency shuttle. There are vulnerable children. On the FRONT LINES. And Shee-...no. Supreme Chancellor Palpatine, won't let them GET THEM TO SAFETY?

Is THIS what over a decade of friendship means to this man? Is THIS what his "sympathies" are truely WORTH? Empty words and no action? Saying what you want to hear then sitting in his fancy office while CHILDREN are shot at?

Anikin wants to put his fist through a durasteel WALL.

Through some careful maneuvering, some Ships on the way back are are able to pick up the VERY In Trouble kiddos. It'll be about five ship hops. But they'll get there. And in the mean time? The entire GAR now knows where the Chancellor's priorities lay.

But? What to do, what to do? The kiddos are GONE! Anikin's head is gonna start getting crowded. Fuzzy. Crushed up and too small! He literally, physically, NEEDS people. For his mental and ultimately physical health!

"Well... you DID say Midi-chlorians are in every living thing, didn't you? It's just that most Sentients don't have enough to reach the threshold of Force Sensitive. Right?" Says Anikin's medic.

Anikin raises a finger. Opens his mouth to respond.

Considers this genuinely.

Puts DOWN his finger and closes his mouth. Nods. Yes. Yes, they DO. Why? Where exactly are you going with this? Medic taps a message to the GAR in ship message board. Please. You know EXACTLY where he's going with this.

Yeah.

Yeah, Anikin does.

And the Vode? Gotta admit. Having their General curled up like a comm system in the back of their brains? Kiiiiinda weird at first. But he's not? Actually? Touching anything? It's kinda like having someone follow you around, hanging off your shoulders in a hug. Because they feel needy and desperately need the contact. Little awkward? Yeah.

But we move on.

And the General respects boundaries. Politely pulls back and out/away when they want "personal" time. Something he had practice doing cause he's in a relationship. And there are Thoughts and Feelings you DO NOT want to share with younglings. It apparently helped him learn to shield. Quickly. Very, VERY quickly.

They only laugh at him a little bit.

He imagines throwing pillow blocks at them.

But THEN? One of them gets a head wound. Nothing to terrible. But bad enough that the midi-chlorians flow up to the area, to help speed up and properly regulate the healing. Because their's have become more active. Not STRONGER mind you. Just... more ACTIVE.

And they can fucking FEEL their General mentally screech to a full stop. Perfectly, utterly, FURIOUSLY Blank. Like the dead silence before the blaster bolts start flying. Like just after the flash but before the blast hits. A terrible, TERRIBLE silence.

Something is Wrong.

"What Is That?"

What is... WHAT? Sir?

And then things move very, very quickly. All things possible, through the Force. A baby created. Chips UN-created. It really is? Just directing the Midi-chlorians all ready THERE to do what you want them too. Offering up some extra energy, if needed. A Leader to guide the hive.

One deep enough meditation, reaching though-out "HIS" sprawling body? Really, what is the difference between purging a chip from your thigh in THIS body? And being over there? Or over there? What are "walls" or "distance" or this silly concept of "other"?

We Are One With The Force, And The Force Is One With US.

He is every Vode on the Ship. He is Anikin Skywalker. He was a Slave. But now? NOW both he and they and US? Are FREE. He will suffer no slaves in his presence. No more chips or collars with bombs. Time to free the others. Free everyone. Demand ANSWERS.

And they do.

The epilog? Oh THAT I can not stop thinking of.

Padme in the senate. Fierce and accomplished. A storied carrier fighting for the people of the galaxy. Anikin a Creche Master for the POWERFUL kiddos. The strange ones who need someone sturdy.

Who can handle their Us/We phase with grace. Who learns and grows, honors and remembers Shmi Skywalker every time one of them one of them starts to pull away. Starts to develop boundaries. Barriers. Starts to want to be their OWN person. Has not just grown strong in shielding but old enough to develop a defined personality, seperate from their friends.

The twins growing up with a whole Creche of siblings. Because their parents LIVE at the temple. Their mother works at the senate! They wave bye-bye every morning. And spend the day with dad. Not separated, not quite living with them fully either. Not after infancy at least. But the Order is changing.

Vode everywhere. Kids born of Jedi. The Corps withdrawn back to the temple to help handle the influx. Lots of debates about Tradition and Change that Anikin care not a lick about. HE'S taking his Crechelings to the Naboolian Embassy's Spring Festival. Does everyone remember how to be polite? Say "hello"! *various smol children chorus Hello in Naboolian, badly but very earnestly*

Just? Field trips. Droids and Vode dropping by to say hello. Padme being the LION of the senate while her retired kindergarten tearcher equivalent, war hero husband cheers. Adorable but freaky children popping out of the vents. Anikin treating his tiny squad of Tiny Anti-christ Acting Babies as though this were TOTALLY NORMAL and just how children act.

SOFT AND FLUFFY EPILOG~☆

@legitimatesatanspawn @babbling-babull @hypewinter @hdgnj @spidori @tiredafel

[incorrect-riordanverse]

finally reading tsats here are my live thoughts (spoilers, obviously):

i’m so excited because some pages are darkly decorated and its so cool. still don’t vibe with the title though (the sun IS a star and its peeving me)

why are we talking about dating darth vader 😟 where are we rn (anakin is a yes, but DARTH VADER???)

maybe i’m too old but the jokes are not funny 😭

“this whole place feels like my soul. empty and dark. dark as the pit of the underworld.” <- i don’t care if he’s joking nico would never say thissss 🙏😭 we’re only 10 pages in but please stop butchering my fav character he’s not himselffff i am cringing so bad

i know i’m being dramatic but if they do nico dirty in this book i’m going to end it all

oh my god i don’t think i’ve thought about the words “significant annoyance” in so long. bringing back good memories for sure.

i can tell which parts were written by riordan and which parts were written by oshiro. i don’t think their voices are blending very well together…

also, maybe it’s because it’s the start of the book and they’re trying to familiarise new readers quickly with the characters but it feels like they’re making nico the caricature of ‘emo and shadow and ebony darkness dementia raven way 🥀⛓️🖤’ and will the caricature of ‘happy and sunshine and blonde and flower gleam and glow ☀️🌈🫧’ and i usually like this dynamic when it’s not blatantly pointed out every other page. i have faith they’ll show more complexity than this later on though. future yan will let me know by the end. (future yan here, im not at the end but the characterisation def does get more complex thank gods)

oh ok so it is bob the titan

since when was nico’s actual name niccolo??? how did i forget this detail??

“you have to listen if not you’ll share my fate.” “ominous much?” <- ok he’s finally himself again guys it’s all good

the one-sided beef nico has with percy will never not be funny

“cookie monster appeared over the mouth of the jar, reached inside and gobbled up nico like the chocolate-chip cookie he was.” <- nevermind i’ve gone back to hating this book again

“what was one straight boy when you spent your whole life longing for the impossible?” <- i’m reminded of that time a few years back where everyone made ‘having an unrequited crush on percy’ nico’s whole fanon personality, so i’m glad they addressed this somewhat. this boy has been through so much and people really thought crushing on percy was the biggest thing to focus on about ‘nico angst.’

“we made a mistake. you have to fix it.” <- call me a red flag but if i was nico i would do anything and everything to not go. i would medicate myself so highly on sleeping pills that i can’t dream (doctor bf can go kick rocks). i would track percy and annabeth down and haul their asses into tartarus instead to do it. and if i had to go i would only go in to kill bob myself for sending me those traumatic ass nightmares. no thx. bro willingly jumped in himself and now wants me to save him. nuh uh.

not cupid being will 😭 its like his aphrodite 😭 i am not well.

they always have a really good and emotionally moving scene and they ruin it with a dumb joke. let it be heavy 👏👏

something’s really fishy and i have a feeling that it might not be bob calling for him

if this whole “grumpy ball of darkness” thing continues i will actually lose it

you can’t tell me the percabeth pep talk was actually needed. i will forgive it because i miss them though

im sensing tension in the gap between nico’s connection to the underworld and his relationship with will and i’m here for ittttt. give me the dramaaa

who is the gorgyra girl and why is she in their business sm?

oh shit a will solace pov??? christmas came early 🙏

nevermind that whole nightmare sequence was so fucked up 😭😭

somebody HELP HIM i never thought we would get will angst (nico angst fs, but will???)

DONT JUMP IN THE STYX PLEASE

SOMEBODY TELL HIM HE’S HELPFUL OMG

nico strangling epiales in his sleep is so fucking cool he’s literally HIM he’s literally THAT GUY

[marvelstars]

One of the things I have always enjoyed about Vader is how matter of fact he is, like he feels his old master in the death star giving him some variety to what was a very bad day at his job.

I must confront him alone

You should not have come back

Add a little teasing: Your powers are weak old man XD

and then he just ends the duel after Obi-Wan raises his lightsaber out of the way, after making sure Luke is looking at them, which of course makes Luke furious, while Vader is attacking him, dissapearing in the act,Vader obviously notices something is wrong, people don´t just dissapear when you cut them in half but he has other stuff to do so he goes on to deal with the rebellion and pretty much forgets about it until he is able learn something new about his former master which comes in the form of Luke. He doesn´t push it, he just waits for the force to show him, the force has become his main source of information and companion at this stage of his life.

Same with Ahsoka, he feels her in the ship among the rebels but he just says, "The apprentice lives" and then goes on with his life, stopping the rebels and pushing them outside Ryloth, he chooses not to pursue them because his mission was just to make them leave the planet and he does it.

Then when he finds her on Malachor he offers her to join him for the sake of their old relationship but even when he says this you can see this is perfunctory on his part, he needs to offer this to her because he doesn´t want to kill her so he tries to give her an out and even counsel her a little bit about revenge, half sarcastically and half because he still cares that "snips" keeps being true to herself. So when she decides to attack him he follows and doesn´t hold back.

The only time he truly losses his cool with Ahsoka was when he heard her say, she wanted to stay with him and not leave him behind again, this makes him furious, not just because he believes it´s way too late but because he thinks, what does Ahsoka hopes to acomplish by staying with him in the darkness? You should go away or I will kill you. Get away from me because I am hopeless. There´s not fixing me.

Vader just gives Luke a little bit more of slack in this area because he knows he doesn´t know anything about the past and doesn´t expect him to know something he believes he was never told,he just says "It´s too late for me my Son"

Vader´s despair at his situation, him remembering and believing the old Jedi saying "Once you fall to the darkside, it will forever dominate your destiny" because it wasn´t just a jedi belief, it was also a sith belief, no one had been able to turn back from the darkside after falling so hard and for so many years, so being treated pretty much like death man, a ghost still walking, while living half dead inside his armor which gives him pain just in the act of breathing, it has become such a natural part of his life that he can´t conceive there´s something else beyond that, there´s no fixing him, he´s hopeless but he has made his peace with it.

Instead he has developed a new reason to keep on living if only because he wants to stop himself from falling completely into insanity and this is "Peace and Order in the galaxy" he may be hopeless himself but there´s no reason why he should stop himself from doing his duty, as he sees it, to the galaxy and to the Empire and his Emperor, who are the only things left of value in his life, he may not find value in himself but he finds value in doing something for the galaxy, he isn´t blind to the Empire´s failings, the Emperor or his own but as he said to Luke, he believes that while there´s not fixing him, the Empire can be fixed. This contrast between hating himself and wanting to do something for the galaxy, just like he wanted to do since he was a little kid is fascinating to me.

He doesn´t truly goes out of this mentality, until Luke convinces him that it´s not to late, that he has value on his own as a person and that what he believed about justice and peace was not a product of the beliefs of a naive kid but something worth fighting for, dying for and this love and faith was too great for even Vader to ignore.

[darfeld]

Ok so cringe is dead so here is my theory of the Force (tm). (No title because damn, it would be a bit much) Anyway, and first, I want to say that the following assume nobody in the Star Wars univers has any definitive answer as to what the Force is, what it wants, if it want something at all, and what it can actually do, etc... And neither does any author, myself included. Even when it was only George's Story it was a way to inject cool magic mixed with philosophy and spirituality, but nothing fixed in stone.

From the movie, I'll just use some basic stuff : - "You must feel the Force around you; here, between you, me, the tree, the rock, everywhere, yes. Even between the land and the ship." -- Yoda, ESB The Force isn't just Life, it's everything, or existence. That's how the Force users can move rocks or spaceships. - The Force seems to favor life, peace, generally positive outcome for lifeforms in general.

I don't have a specific quote for that, but everybody who knows of the Force seems to think so, apart from darksiders.

- There is no "Light side", there is just "the Force"

The movies (at least OT and PT... I would have to check the ST) never mention a "light side". I know "light side" has been mentioned elsewhere, but I like the idea the Dark Side is a corruption of the Force and not really a part of it. Because it fit nicely with the fact that: - The Dark Side corrupts and destroy.

That's what it is actually good at. It corrupt the minds of its users and is whenever it is used it causes pain, suffering and destruction. And not "constructive destruction" like what you would do when you cut a tree to make fournitures, the kind that leaves radioactive waste in its pass. That's the entire point of Anakin's story, and of most darksider known to canon. Also, I don't think we know of any power which would be "light side" only. Vader can use any trick a Jedi can, and even the healing at the end of RoS can probably be done by any darksider who would want to consider it for whatever reason. So there you have it. Those are pretty consistent stuff through the canon, except maybe the light side stuff, but this seems to be more a thing people say to mark the opposition to the dark side than anything actually different from just "the Force", and people don't go "may the light side be with you" or something. The "light side" is the default, normal state of the Force. Does the Force have a will? Well the Jedi seems to believe so, and so does the gardians of the whills. If they're right, the Force point them at problem to resolve and count on them to so the actual stuff. It can apparently "see" possible futures and show them to people who are perceptive to it. It could also be that the Force is vaste power without sentience, only vague instinct of avoiding death and suffering because it is in all living thing and so it feels all living things. But then, there is the Mortis arc... I don't really like it's implication, but I can find a place for it in my theory. Imagine, if you will, that the Force IS sentient and intelligent. But it's the mind of all living thing present and past mixed together in a way that makes it impossible to understand, and also make it unable to understand more or less humanoid creatures. It needs proxys. And before it can make one universal proxy, people made there own mind about gods governing the supernatural stuffs they witness. The Mortis Gods are that : three manifestation of what people in the past though was the Force. So when they die in the Mortis arc, obviously the Force doesn't disappear, only those manifestations, that were long forgotten anyway. This also fit with the Force Ghosts : Qui-Gon, Obi-Wan and Yoda found a way to keep their persona in the Force, acting as proxy for the Force. That's why Obi-Wan tells Vador he will become more powerful than he ever imagine : He basically tells Vador "I will become the Force". Somehow the Force can't just Force choke Vader and the Emperor to death on its own, so that's too bad... The same thing kinda happen with Bogan and Ashla : At the start, they are just two part of the Force, theorized by some old Force users, possibly old Jedi. Bogan being associated with passions, strong emotion good and bad, and Ashla with peace, ease of mind, logic, etc... Turns out strong emotion can be manipulated and corrupted, so later Bogan is associated with the Dark Side, and Jedi focus more on Ashla or rather the value it is more associated with and become wary of Bogan. But Bogan is NOT the dark side, it's an important part of the Force. (like half of it)

The Jedi then became gardian of peace in the Galaxy. Taking only the least actions to achieve it, by fear of escalating conflicts and creating suffering. The trouble with that way of thinking is you can find yourself on the side of oppression in the name of peace. Seeing how the Galactic Republic is doing by the time Anakin flew off of Tatooine, this is a problem the Jedi haven't been good at dealing with. Anakin could have been the one to bring balance to the Force, not by ending the Sith and/or the Jedi, but because he is passionate, and he could have helped the Jedi see the injustices in the galaxy or maybe just force them to do something about them. (That is, if he got some basic sentimental and political education at any point in his life by anyone else that Sheev Fucking Palpatine)

So in conclusion the Force (tm) is an eldritch god that is literally the essence of the whole universe, it want most of all to not hurt and he tries clumsily to communicate with the beings inside him to try to not hurt. And the dark side is a part of itself trying to exist at the expense of the whole.

[seikilos-stele]

One of those questions that just pops into my head and I need to know if I’m the only one…!!

When my beloved Snape killed Dumbledore I was traumatized. How can my favorite character kill my second favorite character in my much obsessed-over Harry Potter??

Until the whole sequence was explained later, I felt robbed of Snape. I was left adrift because while it did fit the story arc, I felt robbed of my obsession-within-an-obsession: Snape. He went a bridge too far. We were going to have to break up! 😭

In this session of Asker’s Studio™️ (have a seat. just move the cat 🐈‍⬛) I want to know if there has ever been an action/incident in which your favorite character did something so heinous that you had to divorce them?! If so, were you able to get around it by re-writing, ie, fixing the scene with fic?

There have been endings that were fixed (so artistically done…) but when you look back at the demise of Padme, it makes me wonder how anyone can feel anything but revulsion for Vader/Anakin…but redemption being what it is, anything is possible - essentially with fic.

If there is more than one example (I hope that there is at least one example!) all the better!

You know what, I had to think about this ALL NIGHT to come up with one, but I finally got it. Snape would be an easy example, but I didn’t react the same way you did — I think, in 2004 or 2005, post-HBP, JKR gave an interview somewhere. She was asked if Snape was actually a bad guy and she gave some coy answer like “you’ll have to wait and see.” Well, obviously, if we have to wait and see, then he’s a good guy! So that interview soothed my fears 😆

The characters that actually got to me were all played by Robert Carlyle. I had a huge crush on him and I wanted all his character to be admirable! Not good, necessarily, but admirable: meaning, not cowardly, not whiny. I wanted them all to have an internal strength that I could respect, whether their morality aligned with mine or not. And for three important examples, the characters just…didn’t.

Those characters are Rumplestiltskin/Mr. Gold from Once Upon a Time, Nicholas Rush from Stargate Universe, and whatever the fuck his name is from 28 Weeks Later.

I especially loved Rush and Gold, and every time they back-slid into their selfish/cowardly ways, I was personally devastated 😆 miserable! I’d be wracking my brains to make their actions fit my view of the character … or I’d be cursing the writers. Gold had it worse imo. There was an internal consistency with his character for most of S1-3, and imo it disappeared or wobbled too much in the seasons after; it became harder and harder to make sense of Gold’s character arc, and damn near impossible to like him. I couldn’t see the traits I’d originally liked so much.

Rush was easier because he was slimy from the start … I just wanted him to become Less Slimy in a more uniform manner 😆 We got lots of competent moments from him — and lots of embarrassing incompetent moments too. He had a petty jealous streak that wasn’t likable. He struggled embarrassingly with physical tasks too, and his refusal to get in better shape seemed petulant, and like a form of denial. If you’re familiar with SGU, you’ll notice that I’m leaving out Rush’s most abysmal actions. The thing is, I love bad guys who do abysmal things. So long as they have a core of admirable traits: self-reliance, flexibility, competence, for example. It’s when that core is weak that I feel betrayed by characters.

To use Snape as an example, I see now that even if he WERE a total villain, his murder of Dumbledore and his loyalty to Voldemort wouldn’t bother me. It would be the way he bullies children. That’s always been the hardest part about Snape for me to stomach. I don’t know how to explain it! I guess it’s because I like the trope of the honorable enemy soldier — the honorable enemy soldier can do and believe a lot of heinous things, but he can’t be a coward, he can’t be whiny, he can’t bully young children. He has to have an honorable core, something that reminds you of your favorite allies, to contrast with the unforgivable beliefs and actions. If his core isn’t honorable, if it only reminds you of obnoxious bullies and self-serving cowards, then there’s nothing interesting about him — he’s just a rotten guy.

….and I never want a hot Robert Carlyle character to turn out to be a plain old rotten guy. Unless it’s Begbie 😆

ETA: oh, I forgot to answer the other part.

No, I’ve never really written a fix-it. I did write lots of fic for HP, OUAT, and SGU. But I wasn’t skilled enough to do a fix-it at the time. I mostly wrote crack oneshots and occasional humorous multichaps. For OUAT, I eventually expanded into hurt/comfort, but it was fairly OOC across the board.

[itsblueberry13-blog]

#this is what grates the fuck out of me with that post going around joking on how much of star wars would eb shorter if anakin had therapy#because 1. HE HAD THERAPY AVAILABLE TO USE. THE JEDI WERE THERE AND ASKING TO HELP HIM WHEN THEY COULD SEE HE WAS UPSET. THE ISSUE#IS ANAKIN DID NOT USE THE TOOLS OR ADVICE GIVEN TO HIM BY THERAPY TO FUCKING WORK ON HIMSELF!!#HE DID NOT DO THE WORK HE DID NOT LISTEN OR OPEN HIMSELF TO THE JEDI#BECAUSE ITS EASIER TO LISTEN TO PEOPLE LIKE PALPATINE TELL YOU ALL THE THINGS YOU WANT TO HEAR ABOUT YOURSELF#AND BLOW SMOKE UP YOUR ASS RATHER THAN REALLY TAKE IN WHAT THERAPY AND YOUR REAL FRIENDS ARE TELLING YOU ABOUT FLAWS OR FAULTS#IN ORDER FOR THERAPY TO WORK YOU HAVE TO NOT ONLY WANT IT TO WORK BUT YOU HAVE TO ACTUALLY FUCKING DO THE WORK#AND ANAKIN DIDNT FUCKING DO THE WORK.#and 2 no actually star wars would be about the same length because actually most of the plot of what happens to the republic or the galaxy#doesnt actually hinge that much on what anakin does? not really. because the fall of the republic and the jedi and rise of the empire was#all just palps doin palp things. yeah theres some things hes important for in palps' scheme for getting an apprentice#but honestly anakin was more like. idk in my opinion anakin was palps' ultimate way to twist the knife in the wound to strike the jedi with#desecrate the democracy they tried to serve. desecrate the temple they called their home. have one of their own betray and murder them.#like salt or lemon juice on a wound. the twist in the knife.#but also in a way star wars would be shorter if anakin had done the work to better himself because. y know. star wars as its shown.#IS anakin's story. so technically yeah sure itd be shorter but itd also be a smaller story.#not because of the idea of oh wow none of the plot would have happened!!. but because thered be less movies and shit covering anakin#he was a kid picked up. he ahd some issues. he grew up. he listened to the jedi and worked on himself. was good. the end of that.#so much of why we have so much star wars to watch is because its the anakin skywalker story. which IS his failure to better himself.#idk man ive been salty feelin since that one post started cycling back onto my dash and it pisses me off because it completely#and utterly misses a good chunk of why things went down in star wars plot and just#compact it into something completely else#anakin wanted a magic wand to fix his problems and make things the way he wanted them to be#rather than#accept the tools he has to use to work on himself and accept how things will be and maybe even make things as they are now better#in the present#idk im babbling and salty

By @orangeykay

#look if I lived in a society with space wizards#I would very much want them to know how to control their emotions#given the incredible power they have acces to#the Jedi were very clearly aware of the power they had access to and the need to be mindful of emotional response#Anakin did in fact have access to the very teachings that would’ve helped him#had he been open to it

By @obi-wan-cannoli

#the Jedi did very obviously have therapy#and similar mindfulness strategies#anakin just didn’t listen!!

By @obi-wan-cannoli

#the idea pervasive in most fandoms honestly (anakin is FAR from the only character who gets this) that no one would do bad things#if they were in therapy#is SUUUCH a pet peeve of mine#just as someone who's been mentally ill and traumatized for a long time now i hate when people think you can just be plopped into a room#with a therapist and you're just fixed whether you like it or not#like lmao that is not how it works#also a lot of us manage to have trauma and not become genocidal fascists so#not sure i feel like giving anakin/vader a free pass here anyways#people who do evil things choose to do evil things

By @atlanta--airport

#therapy is falling down and scraping your knee you get rocks and dirt in it and then you heal around it bc you don't know any better#and it hurts#therapy is having to reopen those wounds and take the rocks out yourself#it hurts and it sucks but it is so worth it

By @dangerhumming

#yeeaaahh funnily enough mental health vacations don't exactly work if you keep on goofing#the jedi helped anakin and he knew the basics but you can lead the horse to water lol#the horse might still prefer rolling in the mud and trying to bite seagulls#therapy is not a linear process where you push buttons to get better no matter what#it takes time and dedication and the ability to self-reflect and admit you need it#sometimes you have to stop doing things you like to do or find comforting bc they're still harmful

By @ilum-you-so-much

Everyone says that the Jedi never put Anakin in therapy because he fell but if you're saying you never left a therapy session and immediately did all the shit your therapist just told you was bad and you agreed not to do you're a liar

[dokoni-mo]

helloooooo its tuskens-mando and seeing all these asks about the suit vader wears makes me want to comfort this man so much

thinking about an au where reader sees or hears about vader's awful suit. how painful it is. sees him for the first time and realizes how much pain he must be in all the time. and you're determined to fix it. to ease the ache even just a little. so you start figuring out little improvements to his suit to make it easier for him. maybe even treatments for his lungs so he can breathe on his own.

and vader doesn't understand you. why you keep following him around, why you keep wanting to help him. you slowly but surely gain his trust, even his friendship (even tho it might take a bit of time for that to happen) and you're the only friend this man has in years. decades even. he can come to you and allow himself to be vulnerable.

the nights where you know he's been awake longer than he should, longer than anyone should, and you take care of him. you let him lay his head in your lap and you tell him to sleep. the first time he tries to fight it, tells you that its not necessary but you win him over. he can rest now. you're there, you'll keep him safe while he sleeps.

obviously y'all are deeply in love you just won't admit it to each other.

MANDO BACK AT IT AGAIN GIVING US SUCH BOUNTIFUL FOOD 😩😩😩

I can imagine in this scenario that the reader is both a medic AND has some engineering background to them as well. Id like to think that they're like the battlefield medic for Vaders squadron, so they're able to spend a lot of time near him. Through the grapevine and through first-hand experiences they're able to learn JUST how uncomfortable the suit is. And they feel so terrible for Lord Vader. Yeah, he's notorious for all of his actions in the past, but hes still a PERSON. And no one deserves to go through that.

Vader would find it very strange that youre so keen on helping him out (even just on little things, such as just moving a box over or something), but doesn't question it. What he DOES question is when you start doing things against protocol. Such as when you give him extra painkillers than needed, or sew parts of his suit back together.

He does appreciate it though. Enough to eventually befriend you and fall in love with you. He finds that eventually just your presence ALONE helps the pain go away. If it lets it slip about how he's unable to sleep, he notices a change in you. Youre much more DETERMINED for him than usual. You invite him to your quarters one night and hes confused. Hes REALLY confused when you tell him to lay down on the cot, but he does. You slip quietly next to him and pull his armored head into his lap, your fingers ghosting over his helmet and mask in gentle, soft touches.

You talk to him for hours, gently trynna comfort him. It works. For the first time in DECADES, the pain is bareable.

And for the first time in forever, he knows that he's fallen in love all over again

[phoenixyfriend]

Uncle Ben and Little Luke

AKA we combine several types of time travel for maximum Soft Chaos, let’s go

EDIT NOW THAT I’VE WRITTEN THIS UP: jfc this ended up much angstier than initially intended uhhhhhhhhhh sorry

So a common enough thing I’ve seen in time travel fics is characters getting de-aged when tossed back physically, to neither the age they should be in that time, nor the age they were from the time they left, but whatever is most convenient. This is usually de-aging OT Obi-Wan into his TCW self, for reasons relating to, chiefly, removing the damage of Tatooine absolutely destroying his body alongside PTSD-driven alcoholism, but also because fic writers are horny, and Ewan McGregor playing a late-thirties negotiator is on average more appealing to people than Alec Guinness playing a vaguely feral desert hermit.

So, here’s how it plays out:

We take Luke and Ben from some point in the OT. There are a variety of options depending on how angsty we want it to be. My first instinct is ‘right after Owen and Beru die’ but I want to have that sweet angst where Luke knows that his dad is Vader and that Obi-Wan was trying to convince him to kill his own father without telling him that.

We’ll go with shortly after Bespin, and then they end up significantly before TPM. The Obi-Wan of the timeline proper is, eh, let’s say eighteen. Not really ready to be a knight, but old enough that we don’t have to worry about “if we go save Shmi, do we somehow wipe out Anakin?” which is absolutely a worry. Anakin is a toddler, and is in no place to be evil, on account of being literally two years old. He can’t even explode people with his brain yet.

Now, Ben finds himself mid-thirties, as is traditional. He’s not upset at this, because his joints hurt so much less than they used to! His knees aren’t exactly teenage-perfect, but by the Force are they better than they were in the years before he died! His hair has color! He doesn’t have arthritis! And, goodness, no physical withdrawal symptoms! The psychological aspect is still there, but nonetheless, he’s in much better shape than he last remembers being.

Luke looks like he’s about six. He was recently twenty-two. This is not an upgrade. Ben keeps having to carry him. He can’t see over the counter when they enter a bar for information. He can’t enter the bar in the first place. He’s very annoyed by all of this.

Ben is not annoyed. Ben is having a lot of emotions, actually, but annoyance isn’t one of them. He didn’t get to help raise Luke the way he might have if Anakin hadn’t lost his shit, okay, he sees a small Luke and he wants to hug him and cry.

Luke would like to be able to purchase a speeder part without the lady at the stall asking him if he needs his “dad’s” permission.

Once they figure out when and where they are, they need to decide where and how to leave. There are general shenanigans to gamble their way into enough money to hire a ship. They are in the ass end of nowhere, but definitely not Tatooine. There appears to be a jungle. There appears to be a significant variety of man-eating creatures. There appears to be a temple to the Force of questionable origin. None of this is actually helpful, except for the moment they find a “baby’s first lightsaber” in the temple.

Luke only has one hand and, being a six-year-old, his body is growing too fast for him to bother with getting a wired-in prosthesis the way he could as an adult. He can get a more basic prosthesis, but nothing that attaches to the neurons. He’ll outgrow it too fast.

He’s tiny and he’s not used to doing things with just one hand. He uses the Force to do what one hand can't, and every time someone tries to tell him he's misusing the Force he whaps them with the empty sleeve.

So, you know, they find out what year it is. Ben has a breakdown. Luke is upset that he left behind his friends. Ben admits to him that Leia was his twin. Luke stares in horror because dude, she kissed him, you couldn’t have mentioned this earlier???

Ben points out that Beru and Owen were keeping Luke away from him for nineteen years, and then they had about three days of awkward travel to find Leia in the first place, and then Ben died. He didn’t have a whole lot of time to figure out how to tell him.

(This sparks an argument that lasts several days. All onlookers assume that Ben’s son is throwing a tantrum. He doesn’t correct them, even though this is a very valid reason to be upset, because the truth is much harder to explain.)

Sooooo they travel. Mostly, Ben plays Sabacc, cleans house, and pays their way towards Coruscant. Luke still really wants to learn to be a Proper Jedi, even though Ben is pretty sure that Luke would have... a lot of difference of opinion with the Temple, but sure. Coruscant. They can at least stop by, and see Qui-Gon, and Mace, and Quinlan, and Bant, and everyone else that’s still alive and not tragically deceased in the horror following the start of the Clone Wars and then the birth of the Empire, and Ben can have a nice sob over all his dead friends being alive again.

Ben is only barely holding it together while Luke is in the room with him at any given point. But it’s fine! It’s fine. He’s fine. All of his loved ones have come back to life! It’s great! HE’S FINE.

He is not fine.

Luke is also grieving all the people who haven’t been born yet, but he’s... significantly more okay than Ben is.

The closer they get to the Core, the more often people just assume Ben is Luke’s father, and then look shocked and uncomfortable when Luke flatly calls him by his name, and they just... compromise. This is the point at which Luke starts calling him “Uncle Ben.”

Ben cries in his bunk later that night. Luke overhears it and wonders how the HELL Ben is more unstable now, when there’s a chance to fix things and no Vader or Empire trying to kill or capture both of them, and all his friends are alive.

(Luke will later learn a lot about PTSD and realize this is actually a fairly normal situation, to process significant events and emotions only after gaining safety or catharsis.)

(Twenty years on a ball of sand with an alcohol addiction and debilitating fear of the man you raised as your own brother is not, in fact, safe or cathartic.)

At any rate, they’ve settled into that pattern by the time they reach the Inner Rim. The Inner Rim is the part of the galaxy at which they’ve collected enough money (and mental stability) to travel a little better, and to take a few more risks.

Risks like “manipulate people with those baby blues.”

Ben tells Luke that he’s a menace, after he pouts so cutely that he gets a free scarf added on to a purchase that Ben makes. Luke responds that Ben has no room to talk, since he flirted a free breakfast out of that one inn owner.

Also, Luke is currently physically six. That is objectively a situation that sucks. He deserves to use it for all it’s worth if he’s stuck like this.

“You know, if you keep wearing all-black and looking longingly at the velvet cape and Space Chanel boots, the temple is going to worry that you’re a darksider.”

“Uncle Ben... you told me, yesterday, that I sparkle so brightly in the Force that it’s almost blinding.”

“Yes, but the gloves--”

They don’t agree on this, but Ben relents. He does actually understand good fashion, unfortunately, and he’s not unaware of how much Leia taught Luke about such things.

Luke’s about forty years ahead of the curve, of course, but Skywalkers are prone to such things. It’s usually in regards to technology, granted, but...

They get to Coruscant. Ben is very obviously a Jedi. He knows all the right words and walks like a Soresu master and feels warm and comforting in the Force. They let him in with minimal questions. They note down “my first padawan left the order to have a child, but died shortly after; I consider Luke here to be my nephew, and have raised him as such,” and move on.

Luke is vaguely annoyed because he already had an uncle (and aunt) that raised him, but he admits that a person can have more than one uncle. He can live with this. Ben was more family to Anakin than Owen was, in some ways, so it’s kind of true. Luke is even working on feeling more childish affection for Ben instead of the complicated mess of emotions that come from being lied to about some very large and important subjects, and then seeing the person saying those lies have regular emotional breakdowns due to something as small as Luke saying he likes the curve of the hull on that freighter.

(Apparently he sounds just like his father did as a child. This is almost heartwarming.)

The thing is! The thing. The thing is, they almost make it to the Halls of Healing to get looked over for weird viruses, or Outer Rim Parasites, or whatever the hells needs to be happening. They almost make it without Ben having a flashback to dead younglings or brainwashed troopers or the declaration of a Sith Empire. They almost make it without incident.

Then Ben sees Qui-Gon, and freezes, and does not move again.

Luke cannot get him to restart.

People are staring.

They haven’t even made it to Medical, Uncle Ben, come on.

Young, local Obi-Wan comes over and asks if there’s something he can do to help. Or maybe this “Ben” knows Qui-Gon? Master Jinn doesn’t recognize Ben, but maybe Luke knows more?

Luke does know more, but what Luke actually says is “he probably needs a mind healer.”

(Ben will not appreciate this.)

(Ben is unfortunately standing in the middle of the hallway and completely unresponsive, and is unable to argue with this assertion.)

(Ben is pretty much proving this assertion entirely correct, actually.)

Obi-Wan is helpful, if a little bitchy in the manner of most late-teens individuals, and offers to help get Uncle Ben down to the Halls of Healing. It involves Obi-Wan gently pushing on Ben’s shoulders, and Qui-Gon offering to carry Luke so he can be in Ben’s sights (because Ben is a Mystery, and Qui-Gon is quite fond of those, so he wants to stay involved). Ben kind of just... shuffles on down.

There are medical tests. They ask about how Luke lost his hand. He refuses to talk about it. They ask how Ben got all his scars. Luke says he doesn’t know. They ask if he knows why Ben looks like he’s been through a war. Luke says it’s because he probably was.

They check for foreign viruses. They find evidence of thus-far-unpatented vaccinations. They ask Luke if he knows what he’s vaccinated for.

“How would I know? I’m six.”

They agree that this is a good excuse.

(It is not. He’s lying. They do not know this.)

They do some more tests. They find a lot of questionable medical bullshit in Ben’s body. Most of this is from the clone wars, but they don’t know this. Someone realizes they haven’t gotten a ping back from the Shadow Network regarding “do we have permission to pull the medical file of a Jedi that isn’t in the normal database? We’re assuming you know who he is, since we don’t.”

The Shadow Network does not know who Ben is.

The healers, of course, go “huh, that’s weird, but maybe the name he gave his nephew was fake. We can’t exactly ask ‘Ben’ for more details right now. We already had to sedate him. Let’s check the DNA!”

The DNA pulls up as Obi-Wan Kenobi.

The padawan who brought this guy in two hours ago.

“Huh, that’s weird. Let’s call in Kenobi and ask if he knows what’s going on.”

Obi-Wan absolutely does not know what’s going on.

They ask Luke.

“Oh, I don’t know,” he says, lying through his teeth and not even pretending otherwise.

“You’re not a very good liar,” teenage Obi-Wan tells him.

“I’m not trying to be,” Luke says. “Can you get Master Yoda? I feel like we’re going to need him.”

They normally wouldn’t get Yoda on the request of a six-year-old, but they also normally don’t have a catatonic thirty-something Jedi who looks like he’s been through a war popping up in the medical database as the pimply teenage padawan that broke his pinky trying to do a Badass Ataru Flip last week.

Or... whatever Luke i... is... oh dear.

“Young one,” Qui-Gon asks, while people whisper-shout behind him, not realizing he’s cutting the Correlian Knot and just asking the kid himself. “Do you know why your midichlorian count is so high? It’s almost unheard of.”

“Uncle Ben said my dad was the Chosen One,” Luke says, because he is capable of being a little shit and is actually really eager to let Ben deal with some of the fallout. He feels for the man, really, but he’s also tired of being the one to field every single question.

Also, the expressions that pass on Qui-Gon’s face are hilarious.

(Luke may or may not be more affected by his six-year-old brain than he would like to admit.)

“Thank you,” Qui-Gon says, sounding more than a little strangled about it.

It takes another three hours for Ben to wake up.

He listens to the questions. He hears what they say his ‘nephew’ said. He looks at Luke.

“Is this revenge for not telling you about Leia?”

“It’s not revenge,” Luke does not lie. “I just don’t know how to explain it.”

“It’s pretty easy to explain.”

“It’s not my secret.”

“This is revenge for the Leia thing.”

“No,” Luke says. “Revenge for the Leia thing was when I ate a live frog in front of you.”

This is the point at which someone interrupts and points out that they appear to be stalling.

“Oh, he is,” Luke tells them. He gestures at Ben. “I can’t tell you more, because it’s more his story than mine.”

“I’m afraid, Master, that I am very likely to have an emotional breakdown if I allow myself to consider the reality of this situation for longer than the fraction of a second I already have,” Ben reports, full of false cheer. “Suffice to say, I am far from stable and have only held out this far for Luke’s sake.”

“Can you explain why you have my DNA?” Obi-Wan asks, as the person who’s most concerningly involved in this situation.

“You can,” Ben says, smiling like there is absolutely nothing wrong in the slightest, ever. “I’m you, from the future. I actually died and spent a few years dead before coming back. I’m not sure why I’m younger than I was when I died, but I appreciate being able to put on my shoes without my knees attempting to mutiny.”

“He needs a mind healer,” Luke reiterates, in case the strained grin hasn’t made it clear. “So do I, but not as much.”

“I have felt literally every person in this Temple save for Luke and Yoda die,” Ben reports, looking a shade more manic than a few seconds earlier. “It’s very overwhelming to feel you all being alive again. I may be approaching a mental breakdown, and I’ve been rather strictly advised against using alcohol to treat my traumas again.”

Luke kicks him in the thigh. It’s not a very hard kick, because he is very small, and he does actually like Ben. “I’m not letting you turn into an old drunk again.”

After several seconds of silence, a healer quietly suggests that everyone clear the room, and asks if someone could fetch Master Yoda as the youngling requested.

(THIS IS ALMOST THREE THOUSAND WORDS. I started it less than two hours ago. Why am I like this.)

[absolutepokemontrash]

You don't need to write this if you dont want too because it's up to you but this is something wholsome

WHAT IF L!MC M!M & BBY A!MC BECOME BABIES AND THERE EVEONES HAS TO CARE FOR THEM,

I apologize for having such horrible writing and grammer. I never payed attention in school, nor could I afford to pay attention 👉😎👉

Bro I feel you on the not paying attention in school thing. Fear not, dearest asker, ask for demon babies, and since I am a merciful writer, you shall receive.

Oh Shit, Half-Demon Babies are Running Amok Send Diapers and Help-

Mini summary for the casual reader, L!MC is Lucifer’s half demon child who got summoned into the Devildom to be one of the human exchange students, M!MC is Mammon’s half demon kid, and A!MC is Asmo’s. Let’s get to the fic!

Ah, what a relaxing day... Lucifer was sitting back in his desk chair, enjoying a nice glass of Demonus and listening to one of his favourite cursed vinyls. He had done a damn good job on his work earlier and Diavolo had insisted there was no more work to be done and he could have the weekend all to himself.

Of course, his brothers were still a factor that could have ruined his me-time... on any other weekend! Satan had just gotten a new encyclopedia to read, so he wouldn’t be causing any trouble, Beel and Belphie were going to take that Devildom food tour, Mammon and M!MC were planning on spending the entire weekend shopping, Asmo and A!MC were going up to the human world on Saturday and staying until Sunday, and Levi... He got a sudden burst of inspiration for his Animal Crossing Island and most likely wouldn’t be leaving his room for the next month. Lastly, L!MC wouldn’t be causing any problems, his child would probably spend their time with him rambling about musicals or anime they had seen, and Lucifer found their intense interest very adorable.

Ah... peace and quiet...

...

...why did Lucifer hear crying?

There, standing in the entrance hall of the House of Lamentation, was Solomon, holding three screaming babies.

What, and I cannot stress this enough, THE HELL?!

“Ah, Lucifer,” Solomon attempted to wave hello, but needing to continue to bounce one of the babies on his hip kind of hindered the gesture, not that Lucifer wanted a wave at that moment. “I’m sure you have questions.”

After everyone had gathered into the living room, Solomon explained how a spell gone awry had hit L!MC, M!MC, and A!MC with the effect of turning the three into the screaming infants that stood (or... awkwardly sprawled out) in front of them.

On the bright side, the spell only had a timespan of roughly two days, so they wouldn’t be stuck like that forever.

Everyone sat in silence for a few minutes (save for the babies, who were still either crying or incoherently babbling) as they processed that information. Lucifer, ever the flawless older brother and leader, stood up and clapped his hands together once.

“Alright then, everyone cancel your weekend plans, we need to deal with this.”

Lucifer’s dearest little brothers all whined in protest, Satan in particular. “They’re not our kids, why do Belphie, Beel, Levi, and I need to cancel our plans?!”

“Satan,” Lucifer said sternly. “You don’t remember this, but it took six people to take care of one of you. The kids may only be half demons but there are three of them. We need all hands on deck. Besides, if you all want someone to blame, blame Solomon.”

Everyone turned and levelled their practically murderous glared at the sorcerer, who suddenly pulled baby A!MC into his lap and began to rock them back and forth.

“I have never felt more unsafe.” Solomon laughed nervously. “But you wouldn’t kill me while I’m holding my not-child would you?”

Asmo stomped over and snatched A!MC away from Solomon. “I can’t believe you- ACK! A!MC! Stop drooling!”

A!MC had a long trail of drool coming out of their mouth which caused Asmo to shriek and hold A!MC at arms length away. “Stop that! That’s gross, A!MC, you know better.”

The adorable baby continued to babble and drool.

Mammon picked up M!MC, who almost immediately stopped crying upon seeing Mammon’s watch, they began making grab hands at it. “Ah, ya want the watch?”

M!MC squealed in delight as Mammon dangled the watch above them, Mammon was delighted that his little brat still had their expensive taste, even as a baby. “Hey, look at me! I’m doin’ pretty good! Suck it, Asmo!”

As Asmo and Mammon bickered, Lucifer took the time to look at L!MC, they pulled at Lucifer’s tie and hummed to themselves. They were mind numbingly cute despite the screeching they were doing earlier. The sight tugged at the cold spot where Lucifer’s heart should have been, he had missed this part of his child’s life... maybe just that weekend he’d get a chance to-

“Solomon where do you think you’re going?” Lucifer was pulled from his thoughts when he noticed the shifty bastard trying to make his escape. “You’re staying to help manage this nonsense.”

—————

A!MC may have been an absolute ray of sunshine normally, but as a baby, they definitely lived up to the term demon-spawn.

A!MC would scream, cry and pitch a fit if they didn’t get what they wanted immediately, not that they had any way of articulating what they wanted because they were a god damn baby! Asmo and Solomon were at the point where they were just holding stuff out to A!MC to see if it would make them stop crying.

“Come on butterfly, don’t you like this... antique perfume bottle?” Asmo asked, A!MC took one look at it, then burst into flames and started wailing again. “For the love of my father WHAT DO YOU WANT FROM ME?!”

Now there were two sobbing messes in the room, and one was on fire. Solomon quickly magically took care of A!MC’s little fire problem (the baby was fiiiiiiine, demon babies light themselves on fire all the time!), picked A!MC up, sat down on Asmo’s bed, and snapped his fingers. Tiny balls of light gently floated into the air around the three, Asmo looked up from his pity party upon hearing A!MC stop their crying.

“See, you still like my magic, even as a baby, right A!MC?” Solomon asked, A!MC looked around in silent wonder, trying to reach up and touch the lights.

“Oh Solomon, this almost makes me forgive you for screwing up my weekend plans...” Asmo sighed in relief, he sat next to Solomon and pulled A!MC into his lap. “Not very colourful though, is it? Let me fix that.”

Asmo smiled as his own magic added streaks of colour, it was like their very own private showing of the northern lights. A!MC had on one of those goofy baby smiles that can make even the grumpiest person smile back.

Solomon and Asmo shaped some of the lights into shapes and animals, Asmo let a pink butterfly land on A!MC’s nose, much to their adorable delight.

“And that one’s a bird, and that one’s a giraffe,”

“That’s an alpaca.”

“Sorry, an alpaca with a weirdly long neck, oh! And a sheep!” Asmo looked down at his lap where A!MC sat and tickled their sides. “Everyone likes sheep!”

He then quickly shaped a ball of light into a scorpion and made it scuttle into A!MC’s lap. “But I have to say, scorpions are the best.”

The fifth born sighed in contentment as their sweet little hellspawn continued to watch the magic show. Never in his life did Asmodeus ever think he’d be this happy holding a baby, usually babies were things he thought should be handled with hazmat suits, but not at that moment. His little butterfly truly did have him wrapped around their finger.

“Asmo, hey, Asmo,” Asmo looked over at Solomon, who had a glowing triangle over one of his eyes. “Would you like to join my secret society?”

“Solomon, you are ruining the moment.”

——————

“C’mon kiddo! Eat your damn food!” Mammon once again tried to shove the spoon into his kid’s mouth with the same result as the 50 previous attempts.

“YUCKY!” M!MC shouted and slapped the spoon away.

“Here,” Beel took the spoon from Mammon. “Maybe it’s yucky like they said.”

Beel ate what was on the spoon, then smiled brightly. “You can really taste the mango!”

“See bud..? Beel likes it.” Mammon gestured at Beel, who was eating the entire jar of baby food as Belphie watched in amusement. He was such an asset to the team. “Beel! They need to eat!”

“Fine, let me try.” Belphie grabbed another spoon, and waved it in M!MC’s face. “Here comes the airplane... whoosh... whoosh...”

M!MC didn’t budge, Belphie knitted his eyebrows and rolled his eyes. “Okay, fine, be that way.”

Levi pushed open the door to the kitchen, and upon seeing the scene before him, immediately turned and tried to leave. “Nope! Food isn’t worth getting spit up all over me-”

Mammon lunged forward, grabbed the back of Levi’s jacket and practically yanked him into the kitchen, he slapped a spoon into his hand and smiled. “C’mon, do a favour for your super great big brother!”

The third born looked at M!MC, who defiantly stared back at him, the baby had the upper hand and the little brat knew it. Babies were so much cuter in anime...

Levi nervously stepped forward and held out the spoon like a weapon. “O-okay M-M-M!MC... you need to eat your food... pls... pls eat.”

M!MC said nothing, they only did what most babies did.

...

They spun their head 90 degrees until the back of their head was all Levi could see.

Everyone in the kitchen stood in complete silence, until Mammon jumped a foot in the air and started screaming bloody murder. “MY BABY!”

He dove forward and scooped M!MC up in his arms, the baby, obviously freaked out by the sudden loud noise, had begun to cry.

“It’s okay! It’s okay! Uh... uh...” Mammon looked around frantically. “Hush little baby don’t say a word... papas gonna buy you a mockingbird. And if that mockingbird don’t sing, papa’s gonna buy you a diamond ring... and if that diamond ring is brass, butitwon’tbebecauseyouroldmanwouldn’tgetcheatedlikethat-”

M!MC spun their head back to its correct position, but their crying sounds were now several octaves lower... It sounded like if someone put a baby in the Darth Vader mask but without the weird breathing sounds...

Mammon looked to Belphie. “I’m blankin’ on nursery rhymes! Ya hafta know some kid songs!”

Belphie, after being put on the spot, suddenly forgot every single nursery rhyme and lullaby any of his brothers had ever sung to him. Oh! A song popped into his head! He could sing that!

“Lizzie Borden took an axe, gave her mother forty whacks, when she saw what she had done, she gave her father forty one-”

“Not that one!” Mammon squeaked, holding M!MC closer to him. M!MC’s voice had returned to normal, the next problem is that they were only speaking in infernal. “Somethin’ else!”

“There was an old lady who swallowed a fly,” Beel began to sing. “I don’t know why she swallowed that fly... I forgot the rest of the song...”

“Dammit... Leviiiiii!” Mammon wheezed, desperately trying to calm the angrily growling M!MC. “Sing! Sing anything!”

“A-anything?” Only one song came to mind. “Uh um... With the doors of heaven and Hell barred, there is no other but the guard, Master of the Hellish Yard...”

Mammon lit up and nodded like Levi had just offered him a million Grimm. “Aw hell yeah! This song!”

He handed M!MC to Beel and began to dance and sing next to Levi, who had really gotten into the song as well!

“With those sins that you've committed, If you pay you'll be acquitted, and your crimes all permitted,” the two paused for dramatic effect before both belting out the best line in the song.

“ONLY ONES WITH CASH DO WELL, WELL AT LEAST IN HELL!”

As Levi and Mammon continued to sing, M!MC became so entranced by the dance, that they stopped their demonic babbling and just watched the second and third born dance and sing the English cover of an old vocaloid song. Belphie and Beel made brief confused eye contact to make sure the other twin was seeing the same thing.

The duo finished the song and took a bow, Beel lightly tapped M!MC’s chubby baby hands together to make it look like they were clapping. It was enough for Mammon and Levi.

“Thank you, thank you,” Mammon said. “We’ll be here forever, next show ain’t free.”

“We should sing The Tailor on Enbizaka next!”

“Levi! No! That song is like... seven minutes long!”

“Hey, morons,” Belphie stuck his thumb at M!MC. “They still haven’t eaten.”

Mammon’s triumphant expression dropped right to the floor. “Ah fuck...”

——————

“Satan, where’s L!MC-” Lucifer looked up at the ceiling of Satan’s room and his jaw dropped. “WHAT ARE THEY DOING UP THERE?!”

“I can’t get them down!” Satan hissed back.

L!MC. L!MC the BABY. They were on the ceiling. They were sitting upside down on the ceiling like it was an average Friday. Lucifer was too old for this shit...

“L!MC.” Lucifer held out his arms, L!MC squinted at him, that’s when Lucifer remembered L!MC was practically blind without their glasses. “L!MC, it’s your father, come here.”

“Don’t you think I’ve tried calling them down like that?!” Satan spat as he quickly ran a hand through his hair.

Lucifer shot a glare at Satan, then Lucifer heard something that nearly made his (lack of) heart stop. Oh no- L!MC was yawning-

L!MC yawned and suddenly detached from the ceiling. Lucifer and Satan both dove forward to catch L!MC, which culminated in one of Satan’s piles of books falling down, but with L!MC safe and sound.

“Damn it.” Satan grumbled as Lucifer shifted to properly hold L!MC. “This is going to take forever to clean...”

“That was clean?” Lucifer raised an eyebrow as L!MC began to fuss slightly.

Satan growled and rolled his eyes. “Yes, it was clean thank you very much. I knew exactly where everything was.”

The cat that unofficially ruled the House of Lamentation pranced into Satan’s room like it didn’t have a care in the world, it began to bat at one of the loose papers that had been scattered around the floor. Detective Toe Beans, you’re an esteemed detective, and technically RAD’s mascot, stop that!

Satan scooped up the cat and began to put the books back in the pile, when Lucifer noticed a familiar, beat-up old book lying near the bottom of the pile.

“Ah, I remember this book,” Lucifer leaned down and picked it up, showing the cover to L!MC, who didn’t seem very interested and continued petting the fur part of Lucifer’s jacket. “It’s good for a bedtime story, right L!MC?”

Lucifer tucked the book under his arm and turned to leave when Satan practically shot upwards. “If you think you can just take that out of my room, you’re completely delusional.”

“Are you seriously going to whine about getting a bedtime story for L!MC?”

“CAT!” L!MC looked over Lucifer’s shoulder and reached for Detective Toe Beans. “CAT!”

“Yes L!MC, cat.” Lucifer whispered to them, then turned back to Satan. “And if I’m remembering correctly, I used to read this to you. Do you really want to deprive poor L!MC of bedtime stories from me?”

“Pff... deprive...” Satan rolled his eyes and huffed. “I’d be saving them. You were the only one who never did any voices for the characters, I was bored to sleep.”

Satan walked forward and swiped the book from Lucifer. “If anyone’s reading L!MC a bedtime story, it should be me. I’m twice the storyteller you’ll ever be.”

Lucifer scoffed. “Ridiculous. We’ll both read L!MC a story and they can tell us who did best when they get back to normal.”

“Fine by me.”

The three (four if you count Bean) were soon seated on the couch in Lucifer’s room. Lucifer took the first story.

Satan listened along and absentmindedly pet Bean, hearing a story he had heard over and over again had managed to bring back memories of a time where he had significantly less control over his wrath. Every night he’d demand a bedtime story or he’d throw a tantrum unlike anything the Devildom had ever seen.

The eldest was always there to swoop in and read Satan a story whenever the little ball of seething rage looked ready to kill the unfortunate brother who told him it was bedtime.

It had gotten to the point that Satan could recite most of the stories in the book completely by heart. He chuckled under his breath as he remembered the time he matter of factly told Lucifer that he’d be reading him the bedtime story that night and proceeded to pretend to read the story of The Hydra and the Pufferfish. He hadn’t actually learned to read, much to Lucifer’s dismay, Satan just memorized what to say and when to turn the pages.

Though, it was apparently impressive enough at the time to warrant a head pat from Lucifer.

The fourth born leaned closer to Lucifer to get a better look at the book’s illustrations. They were always slightly off and strange looking, much like the pictures in the Scary Stories to Tell in the Dark book that L!MC had given Satan for his birthday.

Lucifer abruptly stopped reading.

“Why’d you stop?” Satan looked up at Lucifer, then over at L!MC. Aw... Satan didn’t even get a chance to read...

“Our audience has fallen asleep.” Lucifer stifled a yawn and prepared to close the book, Satan quickly shoved his hand on the page to stop him.

“You started reading,” Satan looked away and grumbled. “So at least finish the story...”

Lucifer smirked and opened the book back up. “If you insist, Satan.”

————————

Yayyyyy! Babies! I’m sure the three get back to normal by Monday... hopefully...

Here’s a link to the song Levi and Mammon are singing!

I hope you all enjoyed! As of the time I’m posting this, the next set of Lessons 1-5 Headcanons will be out tomorrow at 8:30 pm EST.

[the-ferocious-kittyrose]

Rewriting Haggar/Honerva’s redemption arc

One of the many things that bothered me about VLD S8 is Honerva’s redemption arc. While I was never fully against the idea of Honerva getting a redemption arc, I just didn’t want VLD to do it because I knew that they would fuck it up if they tried. And low and behold, I was right!

But yeah, I wasn’t against the idea of her being redeemed. And I don’t mean “redeemed” as in “all is forgiven and she’s just a good guy now,” but more like a Darth Vader, “the things she did were inexcusable and she would never be able to right all her wrongs but she goes out on one good act to show that there was still good in her deep down and she at least had the potential to change.”

I know a lot of people don’t like the whole, “redemption=death” thing, which I understand, but I personally never had a problem with it.

Ok, so why didn’t Honerva’s redemption work? Well there are a few reasons but the one that baffles me the most is that, instead of trying to make her more sympathetic, season 8 seemed to go out of its way to show her being more evil and vile than ever.

And because I have nothing better to do, I’m gonna go through Honerva’s story in VLD and explain what I would change to make her redemption more believable.

(Keep in mind I am not a writer, this is just me ranting about my favorite character and how I personally would’ve written her.)

1. Realizing she’s Altean

I always thought it’s was weird that when Allura said “you’re...Altean!?” In the S2 finale, Haggar didn’t seem to react at all, she just kept attacking. It’s as if she didn’t care or already knew, which doesn’t make sense considering in the S3 finale and S8E2 it’s established that Haggar has no memory of who she was before she died. And in S4E3 she seems shocked by her Altean face (which also doesn’t make sense because her blue skin isn’t camouflage that’s just how she looks after the rift) so it seems like she didn’t know.

Wouldn’t it have made more sence if after Allura said “you’re...Altean!?” Honerva looked confused/shocked? If she became defensive and said Allura was lying/trying to insult her? There’s def anti-Altean propaganda in the empire so it would be considered an insult.

After that she starts questioning Zarkon. And when she looks into his mind, it’s out of genuine curiosity and desire to know the truth, not because, “the empire needs him” or whatever that meant.

And isn’t it a bit odd that she doesn’t seem betrayed at all when she finds out Zarkon has been keeping all this from her? She’s just like, “oh, you’re my husband? Cool.” Wtf???

2. Her past relationship with Zarkon

Okay, I love Zonerva, but if we’re being honest, Zarkon was not the best husband. He enabled the shit out of Honerva, even when it was obvious that the rift was doing serious damage to her physical and mental health. To me, it seems like Zarkon was so blinded by the power the rift gave him that he didn’t realize/ignored the negative effect it was having on Honerva. In the same way he downplayed the negative impact the rift had on the planet.

I think that should’ve been explored more. Maybe Honerva notices that she’s been acting differently and is worried somethings wrong (think S5 Kuron). And Honerva tries to tell Zarkon that she feels strange and Zarkon just brushes it off.

And later, when Alfor visits Diaibazaal years later. Things are pretty much the same except when we sees Honerva, she is very obviously pregnant and Alfor’s there when Honerva falls and goes into labor (instead of a random quintessence seizure). Alfor and many Galran doctors try their best to save her and the baby but she dies in childbirth.

Zarkon goes ballistic. He’s yelling, throwing doctors across the room, and Alfor turns to the doctor holding Lotor and tells them to get the baby to safely, fearing Zarkon will take his grief out on the baby.

Zarkon turns on Alfor, blaming him for Honerva’s death and accusing him of letting her die so that he could get his way and close the rift. He lunges Alfor and roars at him to leave.

He spends the rest of the night grieving at Honerva’s bedside, when Kova jumps on the bed and starts gnawing on her finger trying to wake her up. This is what gives him the idea to bring her back with quintessence.

3. Her current relationship with Zarkon

I think it’s pretty safe to say that they’re relationship didn’t get better after the war began. Zarkon hid her identity and her child from her for 10,000 years and essentially used her as a tool of war. It’s pretty fucked up.

I know it’s pretty well established that Zarkon treats Haggar with more respect than his other underlings, but I feel like it would be interesting to see that change overtime. We see that after Voltron comes back, Zarkon becomes very obsessed with Voltron/Black, and he and Haggar start disagreeing more and more.

Remember the moment where one of Haggar’s druids told Zarkon Haggar said he needed to rest and Zarkon hit them with his bayard and told them, “remember who your master is”? What if, instead of a random druid, it was Haggar who he hit?

I feel like that would be a good way to show Haggar and the audience just how much Zarkon’s obsession with Voltron is affecting him, and make the audience feel a tiny bit bad for her.

Then later in season 4, when Zarkon wakes up from his coma and finds out Haggar brought Lotor back to take his place he gets pissed. He puts a price on Lotor’s head and has Haggar arrested for treason. She steals a ship, escapes, and later on meets up with Lotor’s generals.

Her and Zarkon are officially broken up and her quest to reclaim her identity and get her son back begins.

4. Oriande

I never liked the concept of chosen/sacred Alteans. The idea that some Alteans are just born more powerful than others just feels iffy. My idea of Oriande is that it’s an Altean holly land, any Altean can enter it just depends on whether or not you can pass the White Lion’s trial. Passing the trial proves that your intentions are pure and and the White Lion will bless you with power.

I didn’t like how Honerva seemed to force her way into Oriande, I think it would be more effective if she had gone through normally because, at this point, her intentions were pure. She was going there to purge herself of the dark magic corrupting her and reclaim her memories so she could go get her son back.

I also like the idea that Oriande is a sorta link to the Altean after life, and you can speak with people you’ve lost. Allura gets to speak with Alfor, and Honerva speaks with her mother.

You could also have her be confronted by the spirits of the Alteans she helped destroy. Have the weight of her past actions bear down on her. An important part of any redemption arc is acknowledging the terrible shit you’ve done in the past, and that was severely lacking in Honerva’s arc.

Another interesting thing you could do is have Honerva talk to her younger self. The one that died 10,000 years ago. This kinda thing actually happened in 80s Voltron, young Haggar appearing in Haggar’s head trying to convince her to be good again.

5. Her relationship with Lotor

Now this is where the redemption arc really falls apart. I forget who, but one of the writers said after S5 that Haggar/Honerva was motivated purely by love for her son, but man did they do a bad job of showing that.

And it would’ve been so easy to fix that problem, just have her not be horrible to him. Have them have actual civil conversations, have her protect and defend him. Don’t have her reject him as a fucking baby!

Imagine if, after Zarkon destroys Lotor’s planet, instead of immediately deciding to

exile him, Zarkon says that this is the final straw and he’s going to have Lotor executed. But Haggar speaks up to defend Him. There’s actually a scene in DOTU where Zarkon tries to kill Lotor and Haggar gets on her knees and begs for him to be spared. (Though the scene was mostly played for laughs.)

she asks for mercy and justifies it by saying it would be unwise to kill his only heir. It’s a weak argument, Lotor’s a half breed and couldn’t realistically take the throne, but Zarkon does concede, he still loves her after all, and has Lotor exiled.

And Haggar isn’t spying on him because she doesn’t trust him, but because she’s concerned for him. When Lotor confronts Haggar about sending her cronies after him, she says she knows he’s hiding something. Lotor asks if she’s threatening him, thinking she’s going to rat him out, but she says no, she’s not threatening him, she’s just trying to warn him against doing anything stupid because, with Zarkon seemingly on his death bed, the empire needs Lotor’s leadership.

At this point in the story, Haggar is questioning her loyalty to Zarkon, so I feel like it would make sense for her to be silently supporting Lotor from the shadows.

Then at the Kral Zera in season 5, It was weird to me how she was helping Lotor through Kuron while also telling him he couldn’t be emperor and trying to put Sendak on the throne. I feel like it would’ve made more sense for Sendak to just show up on his own without Haggar.

Haggar wouldn’t even be at the Kral Zera, she would just watch through Kuron.

And then we get to S6 when she actually reveals to Lotor that she’s his mom. This scene was just so poorly done. She never actually apologizes to him, she’s just like “yeah I forgot you were my kid and I never loved you, but were cool now right?” I remember when I saw S8E2 and it shows her after Lotor rejects her and she looks like she’s about to cry, I was just thinking, “this would be very emotional and sad IF she had actually apologized and made it clear that she genuinely loved him.” But she didn’t and I don’t know why!

And then we get to season 8, and of course everything in S8 is bad but Honerva’s story is particularly bad. She’s supposed to be motivated by love for Lotor yet she doesn’t act like she actually cares about him at all.

She manipulates his corpse and when she sees his gross melted body, she doesn’t even react that much. When a mother sees her child’s mutilated corpse, how do you think she reacts? Screaming? Crying?? Hurling??? But no. She’s just like, “...”

And then when she goes to the alternate reality and meets baby Lotor and he rejects her, her reaction isn’t disappointment or sadness, it’s anger and entitlement. She immediately decides, “ok, fuck this kid. Let’s destroy this reality.”

It just doesn’t make sense! This is the season you’re trying to REDEEM her! Why are you going out of your way to make her so vile?

6. Her S7-S8 plan

(Keep in mind I haven’t watched S7/S8 since they came out and barely even watched S8 to begin with, so I don’t remember some things and I can’t be bothered to rewatch them.)

Okay, starting with S7, she’s not in this season at all but in “The Ruins” the druid dude says that her final order was to hunt and destroy the Blade of Marmora. I guess it makes a certain amount of sense because she saw that it was Keith who brought Lotor’s actions to light, but that whole plot was really pointless in my opinion. (Was anybody really hoping for a rematch between Keith and that one random druid?)

If you want us to forgive Honerva for her crimes, you really shouldn’t keep adding more unnecessary crimes. It’s established that there were a lot of Galra war lords vying for power and pirates looking for money, just have it be that Kolivan got kidnapped by one of them.

Then you have her season 8 plan and I’m gonna be real with y’all, I have no idea how to fix this mess.

I feel like the basics of her plan could work. She tries to get Lotor and Sincline out of the rift but when she gets him he’s a melted corpse so the plan then becomes to use sincline to go to another reality to find a living Lotor, but opening all these rifts causes problems and the paladins have to stop her.

But all the shit with manipulating the colony Alteans, killing the White Lion, desecrating Oriande, and destroying Olkarion and entire realities, it was all so unnecessary.

Personally I would cut the colony Alteans from the story all together, there are other ways for Lotor to betray the team. It was a lazy way of making Lotor 100% evil and having Honerva manipulate them is unnecessarily cruel, especially in the season you’re trying to redeem her.

Here’s a very basic outline of how I would do this plot.

If we’re going by season 8’s logic that she needs a sacrifice to bring back Sincline, I would’ve had the Galra she killed at the Kral Zera be the sacrifice, not the White Lion. She stands on the pyramid and talks about how the empire stole her life from her and she wants revenge as she absorbs their quintessence into herself and then uses that to bring back Sincline.

Then when she finds Lotor dead she takes Sincline and uses it to go to another reality where she can be with her family.

The danger comes when she opens rifts to the other realities and rift creatures start coming out and causing damage. The paladins fight them and follow her into the rift to stop whatever evil plan she may have. Because the paladins don’t know that Haggar is now Honerva and all this is just to get Lotor back. They think this is all some plan for multiverse domination or some shit.

Meanwhile Honerva has just been rejected by little Lotor and seeing Voltron show up pushes her over the edge and they fight.

But when they find out the real reason she’s doing all this they start trying to appeal to her and convince her to give up and close the rift peacefully. And similarly to how the paladins had to sacrifice the castle to close the rifts created by the fight with Lotor, Honerva has to sacrifice herself to close the rifts.

In the end, I feel like a Honerva redemption arc could’ve worked if the writers were actually competent and actually made an effort to have her be sympathetic, but In canon, her reasoning, “If I can’t indulge in the simple joys of life, why should anybody else?” just doesn’t cut it.

It’s disappointing. VLD had so much potential. I’m thinking of just rewriting the entire series from the beginning. Hopefully putting all my thoughts out into the universe will help me move on.

[vagrantblvrd]

Din who picks up a stranded Luke and his droid on a random planet while bounty hunting. Heading back to Nevarro to pick Grogu up from Grogu daycare whilst Mando-Dad is doing something stupid even for him.

Luke...well. There were rumors of an Imperial base and it’s Luke and anyway, he’s going to need a new X-wing and a head start before anyone tells Leia. but yes.

(Artoo is still complaining about all the way things did not go to plan. Which, odd, seeing as there wasn’t much in the way of plans in the first place.)

The Razor Crest is looking kind of rough at the moment - there was a whole Thing with a bounty he was tracking and then an asteroid field and some mynocks he’d rather not get into if it’s all the same?

But yes.

Luke who just looks at Din’s ship and offers to lend him a hand in fixing it up in exchange for a ride off-planet.

Smiles all :DDDDDDDDDD at the suspicious head tilt that gets him, “I’m not picky, anywhere but here would be great, really.”

And Din who’s been working on the Crest for the better part of the day and isn’t even a quarter of the way through repairs is like.

Luke doesn’t look like much, just has the one blaster on him and that :DDDDDDDDDDDD smile and while Din knows appearances can be deceiving (Grogu and his powers are a great example) the sooner he get off this planet and back to his tiny gremlin kid the better.

(Artoo’s holding on to Luke’s lightsaber because ~undercover and so on, but Din doesn’t need to know that just yet.)

Anyway.

They fix the Crest and head off towrads Nevarro, but then bounty hunters and that oh, no moment from both Din and Luke because of course there is.

Mandalorian with the tiny green gremlin kid and Hero of the Rebellion/Jedi and weird that Din hasn’t said anything, but whatever.

Pew-pew shootout in space wherein they get away but have to stop for repairs before Nevarro or blow up.

Din’s preoccupied with getting the Crest fixed - again - and while Luke thinks Din’s interesting as all hell, it’s probably best if he didn’t bring more bounty hunters or any nearby Imperials on him and tells him he’ll be fine and thanks for the ride and good luck and disappears on him.

Anyway, Din gets his ship fixed and off to Nevarro and Grogu who gives him this look, and scolds him for something he doesn’t understand - leaving him behind, perhaps, who can say.

They go about their business again and it’s just oh so strange how Grogu laughs and laughs and laughs whenever Din brings the subject of taking Grogu to be with other Jedi.

Really.

Weird.

Chance encounters with Luke on other planets while Grogu’s not around - with friends and such - and it’s all very much the Scooby Doo chase through the doors thing just on a wider scale and such.

But then Gideon and all and Din’s rounding up people to help get his kid back and hey, wow, there’s Luke.

Cara and the others are all !!! because Luke Skywalker and Din’s trying to turn his offer of help down because he thinks Luke’s just an idiot who maybe knows his way around ship repairs and really, really, they shouldn’t be surprised he has no damn clue who he’s talking to.

And then Boba Fett shows up and there’s some Staring going on because Boba Fett and Luke and the last time they ran into one another things didn’t exactly go smoothly -

Boba starts laughing, and Luke is just ??? and a little !!! because what does that even mean?

Nothing personal, just a job. No hard feelings, eh, Jedi?

Sly edge to it, because Boba Fett, and seeing as how Din obviously trusts Boba to help him get his son back -

“Wait.”

Luke looks at Din.

“Wait.”

There’s an awkward little pause as Din looks at Luke.

“You’re a Jedi?”

Everyone looks at Din.

There would be an incredulous silence following that, but Boba’s laughing again, and so are Fennec and Cara and Din doesn’t dare look at any of them because he’s not that stupid.

“Uh, yes,” Luke says, alarmed by Boba and the laughing and all. “I am.”

Anyway, they go off to rescue Grogu where Luke deals with the Dark Troopers before Din can get that wonderful life experience of being punched in the head multiple times - something he appreciates because ow - and Din defeats Gideon and saves Grogu.

“Um...” Luke says, because goodness, that’s an unusual lightsaber Din has now -

Din glances at Luke and shakes his head, pushing Gideon ahead of him on his way to the bridge, and Luke follows, and anyway, anyway.

The whole accidental King of Mandalor bit while Luke takes Grogu to his secret Jedi summer camp training and so on?

And then a few months later Leia approaches Luke about a delicate matter. Negotiations with a world leader interested in joining the New Republic but there’s this tiny little...snag.

“Snag.”

Leia hums, watching Grogu scamper about chasing after some kind of insect, happy burbling and coos and so much determination.

Luke is so very suspicious, because Leia is laughing at him, he can feel it. (Also, she’s smirking, so...)

Anyway, part of the terms include marriage to a certain someone, part of some old...whatever...because reasons.

Luke is like oh, no, because he knows where this is headed.

Last Jedi or not, he’s also Leia’s brother and Hero of the Rebellion and just all kinds of most eligible bachelor around and anyway.

Luke could say no, knows Leia would never push him into it, but then she’s all, “I’ve heard Mandalor is lovely.”

Luke’s suspicion intensifies.

Leia gives him a little crash course in Mandalorian culture, how their leaders are chosen and such and an image of Mandalor’s current leader and Luke is just.

You know.

Because Leia has heard, okay, she has heard all about Grogu’s dad, or at least what Luke knows about him and their past encounters and she’s still laughing at Luke, isn’t she?

“It’s not that funny,” Luke grumbles, because it really isn’t.

Din probably doesn’t even want to marry him, but something, something, something Plot Reasons, and anyway.

Grogu’s been sad lately, and Luke knows Din misses his kid - the look on his face on Gideon’s cruiser, the fact Luke even saw his face - and anyway.

Imagine Din’s face when he arrives to meet his future husband and Luke and Grogu are with Leia’s entourage.

(Well, okay, maybe not his face but his reaction.)

“Uh,” Luke says, because surely Leia or Din’s own people told him who he’d be marrying?

(They kind of didn’t though. Told Din about this guy who destroyed the Death Star and defeated the Emperor and Darth Vader and was hoping to restore the Jedi and so on but were purposefully vague on other personal details and so on.)

Awkward courtship in which Din just stares at Luke because who the hell even is he?

Meanwhile Luke is trying to keep Grogu from cleaning out the frog pond with mixed results because Grogu is fast and sneaky and combined with his adorable little face few can stand up to him.

(Leia will get over it, they can restock the pond.)

Maybe an assassination attempt or two in which they save one another’s lives and both have the oh, no he’s hot moment of realization watching the other in action. (No time for it during Grogu’s rescue, but now that someone wants the other dead? Why not.)

The two of them in the aftermath of one such assassination attempt -

“I think they were after you this time,” Luke says, because he had the first two, and this is Din’s...what, third one? You really think they’d learn after the first time, but no.

Din is looking around at the destroyed room - wall hangings and tapestries and banners, some with blaster holes in them, one almost sliced in half with peculiar singe marks -

“Look, I as trying to keep that one guy from killing you, I’m really very sorry about the banner.”

And various bits of broken furniture and other decor.

Luke with his hair all ~askew, because fighting for their lives and this brightness to his eyes and flush to his skin because fighting for their lives and adrenaline and whatnot and instead of being oh, no he’s hot he’s like that’s I’m married to him like it’s a revelation.

Actually, legally married and he genuinely likes Luke and likes to think the same is true for Luke, and it’s only natural to go over to Luke who’s taking survey of the room as well. Slight frown on his face because this latest assassination attempt didn’t come close to succeeding, but they’re adding up and the repair costs alone, you know.

Luke doesn’t notice Din’s gotten so close until he looks up to ask him something and his voice trails off because wow, okay, wow.

The only time the two of them are this into each other’s personal space is when they’re sparring (dangerous for the heart, because Pining and such), or co-parenting a certain tiny green gremlin kid who gets up to all kinds of antic.

Also, though, sometimes after a long day and they share a set of rooms and all, and it’s no big deal if they settle on the couch together, maybe fall asleep on one another once or twice. (They like each other and there’s trust between them, and anyway, they’re married, so....)

Anyway, Din is right there and he’s looking down at Luke with this intensity Luke’s never seen in him, and he’s about to say something when Din leans down and presses his forehead to Luke’s and Luke just.

Freezes.

He remembers the crash course in Mandalorian culture Leia gave him before she married him off, but also living on Mandalore and learning from Din and the other Mandalorians and he knows what that is, okay.

“Um...” Luke says, sure it’s a mistake, result of adrenaline and stress - multiple assassination attempts and political maneuvering and the whatnot, and surely surely Din doesn’t mean to -

“You’re ruining the moment,” Din says, amusement threaded though his words, but it’s still a moment longer before he draws back to look at Luke.

Doesn’t laugh at the look on his face but it’s a close thing, that.

“What?”

Din reaches out, frames Lukes face between his hands.

Hair out of order and fading blush and this little cut above his eyebrow he must have gotten during the chaos of the fighting and he’s like I’m married to him, another revelation that settles beneath his breastbone because he loves Luke more than he realized - was willing to admit to himself for fear his feelings weren’t returned.

“...We need to talk,” Din says, because there are people in the room with them, cleaning up and removing bodies and the like and far from the privacy he’d like to talk to Luke about their relationship and just.

You know, smooches and happy laughter and so on and Leia being smug as anything the next time Luke calls her to update her.

“So I guess I can tell Han he won’t have to set a rescue plan in action?”

Because Han, and Luke, and Luke can hear Din talking to Grogu in the other room - a very important conversation about the fact some things are not, in fact, food

(Devastating for Grogu, he’s sure.)

“No,” Luke says, happier than he can remember being. “I don’t think I need it.”

[morwensteelsheen]

for the character meme: faramir and cassian

yaaaaaaas thank u 👑👑👑

Faramir

How I feel about this character

Oh boy. Yeah. So I see in Faramir what I wish I were — not just the good stuff like the pacificism and the intellectualism and the romanticism, but what I wish my flaws were too. It’s hard to not treat him as something of a literary patron saint of historians for all the incredible exposition work he’s given throughout the books, y’know? Like he has this incredibly historically-minded perspective on things, yet instead of taking it and behaving (as I tend to) in a sort of deeply pessimistic, confrontational, and defeatist way, he uses it to enable his (over)confidence. And I think that’s really brilliant and something I wish I could do. Yeah. God. I feel a lot of things about Faramir all the time, constantly torn between gender envy for him and normal, slightly furious envy lmao.

All the people I ship romantically with this character

lol whoops it’s just Éowyn lol. I am very much pro he and Aragorn shagging, if I don’t think too hard about it, but there are basically no other characters in the book who have forceful enough personalities to act as a countervailing force to some of his, uhhhh, Extremes, and I think Éowyn ends up being his [David Duchovny voice] human credential, which is lovely.

I guess I’m also partial to the Faramir-As-A-Sloppy-Bitch hypothesis which has him behaving like a bit of a fuckboy, but that’s not really shipping so much as character development? I guess?

My non-romantic OTP for this character

I’m buying him one of those awful one man wolfpack tshirts lmao, my dude absolutely does not have pals. I think he’s got loads of decent working relationships with people and is definitely charismatic when he wants to be, but outwith that……. lol

My unpopular opinion about this character

looooooool, I feel like the Faramir Is Not A Crybaby one is well trodden ground at this point, but one of my favourite unpopular opinions is that I think he’s, like, 15% more cynical than everybody gives him credit for. I think a lot of what he does can be construed as very obviously, uhhh, putting the moves on, I guess? Like I think he’s not making grand statements to Éowyn because he’s Magically Compelled To Do It, but because I think he absolutely 100% knows it’s stroking her ego. And I think playing one man good cop/bad cop with Sam and Frodo isn’t him rapidly changing his Take on the situation after getting new information, I think he’s very purposefully trying to unsettle their psychological defences a bit so he can get a better sense for what’s really going on and whether these two guys are going to end up handing Isildur’s Bane™ over to Sauron.

One thing I wish would happen/had happened with this character in canon

Actually nothing super significant. I guess I think the one kid shit is nonsensical. Even without turning on dumb horny shipper brain that says 0% chance he and éowyn weren’t fucking loads, I genuinely refuse to believe that any self-respecting feudal lord would not at least go for the And A Spare, if not And Several Spares, especially if you’re Faramir and your entire family got obliterated leaving you — Man Who Was Not Meant To Hold The House Down — the sole survivor.

Beyond that Faramir gets exactly what he ought to out of LOTR (though I would have loved to have read about his misery life in the Fourth Age), and I can’t really complain? Maybe a line or two at the trothplighting in Rohan? A chat with Galadriel? idk he really did fine for canon appearances imo

Cassian

How I feel about this character

There’s no way to say this without sounding slightly unhinged, but the scene in R1 where he shoots the injured informant on the Ring of Kafrene is genuinely one of my favourite moments in all of Star Wars. It threw down the gauntlet for visceral depictions of the unfeelingness of the GFFA in a way that hadn’t really been done before. Both the OT and the PT make gestures at it (the destruction of Alderaan is a good example, as is the slightly-bungled slavery subplot in TPM), but neither really show how fucked up people can get when they’re living in a fucked up world and they never show good guys doing things that are of ambiguous morality. Cassian ends up making a (surprisingly, given it’s a Mouse™ production) sophisticated argument for how the Real World works once you get past the golden boy heroes. Yes Luke blows up the Death Star, and yes he brings Vader back to the Light — both things that are unambiguous moral goods — but the reason he’s able to do that is because there’s someone like Cassian out there taking the karmic/emotional/spiritual/whatever hit to enable the Golden Boy behaviour. And I think that’s a really beautiful, really exciting bit of narrative development for SW generally, but to also do it in the context of Cassian — who actively defends his choices? That fucking rocked. I’m bracing for impact with the new show but R1 Cassian is absolutely one of my favourite SW characters, lovely wee man.

All the people I ship romantically with this character

Literally just Jyn. Actually funnily enough he’s very much like Faramir to me in that I think if he didn’t end up with Jyn, he wouldn’t have really ended up with anyone at all. Not in a weird comphet or soulmates way, just in that I think sometimes people need a very specific kind of personality to wear down their defences and sometimes it’s a very specific kind of personality.

My non-romantic OTP for this character

Okay in a fix-it AU I like to think he and Hera would get along fabbo, but from a great distance, as I think each of them would prefer it. Otherwise, I’m sorry to say it but my guy absolutely does not have pals lmao. Cassian no mates rip

My unpopular opinion about this character

I don’t think he’s actually repentant for the fucked up shit he’s done. When he tells Jyn that he’s had to do stuff he isn’t proud of, he’s not saying that because he’s seeking absolution or a chance to do penance or whatever, he’s saying it because it’s objectively true. He has done some stuff he’s not proud of, but contextually I think it’s pretty clear he’s able to justify it to himself well enough that he’s not looking for redemption or whatever.

One thing I wish would happen/had happened with this character in canon

I feel like I need to whisper this so the monkey’s paw doesn’t curl in advance of the show, but it would be genuinely very interesting to see him try to build an actual espionage network for the Rebellion. SW: Rebels touched on the notion of industrial sabotage (actually Mando did too, didn’t it?) and I think it would be especially interesting to see them try that out in a resistance/rebellion framework via Cassian. Let him do some covert ops organisation of workers to undermine Imperial production/supply lines or whatever.

Give me a character xxoo

[clanoffetts]

Tales From Bespin, Vol. III: Someone Different

Lando Calrissian x Reader x Boba Fett

Warnings: porn with a smidge of plot (18+); anal play, butt plugs, lando is an extravagant bisexual who loves fashion; boba is a reserved bisexual who only cares for the color of butt plugs; threesome!!; name calling?

word count: 5.6k

“Good afternoon, love,” a smooth voice says from the doorway. “Your room is still suiting you well, yes?” 

“Yes, Lando, they are” you reply, turning to look at the man. Clad in extravagant burgundy robes today, he was a brilliant contrast to the constant bright white of everything in Cloud City. 

He smiles, allowing himself to venture further into your room. “I’m glad, darling,” he says, taking your hand and pressing a kiss to your knuckles. Always with the nicknames and the flattery, Lando was. Today he seemed to lay it on heavy, though. 

“Something is wrong,” you say. It is not a question, and Lando knows that. 

And yet he answers with, “No, my dove, nothing is wrong.”

Your eyebrow arches at him. You’d learned enough from him over the past few months to know better than that. 

“Yes, it is,” you insist. “You’ve been wanting to gain my trust, and yet you lie.”

His voice is a whisper now, and he leans close. “It is not without good reason. Lord Vader is coming.”

You suddenly wished you had let him lie. “What?”

“Lord Vader is coming to Cloud City. He requests I negotiate with him,” Lando says. There is worry in his eyes, he can’t out-talk Vader, much less out-smart him. 

You pull him into a hug, clinging onto him tightly. You’d never held him this tight. Not even those days and nights on the ship when you’d woken up in his arms in the shared bunk. Nor when you’d kissed him. Nor when you’ve fucked him. 

Lando wanted so badly to relish the feeling of your arms so tight around him, your forehead in the crook of his neck. But he couldn’t, not with the fear of Vader’s impending arrival, not with the feeling of your tears on his neck. 

“It’ll be alright,” Lando says. “We must cooperate.”

“We?”

He nods. “Yes, darling, we. I must cooperate with the Empire, you must cooperate with me.”

“I’m a grown woman, Lando. I can handle myself.”

“No one can handle themself when it comes to the Empire,” he says. “We will move your things into my rooms. They’re bigger, they’ll be more comfortable for you to stay in while Vader is here.”

You pull out of the hug enough to look at him. “Am I to be held hostage by you, Calrissian? Is this not the same as the situation you got me out of?” 

Your words are a dagger. When Lando’s heart began to swell with attraction on the ship after he’d rescued you, he’d promised you a place in Cloud City. And that he’d never harm you. 

“My dove,” he sighs. “You don’t have to. But it will be safer, I think. Besides, I can’t take you with me to negotiations, stormtroopers will be everywhere, and this room will get boring.”

You’re uncertain still, more out of stubbornness than anything else. “Lando, I don’t know. And it’s not like you’ll always be with Vader, right? We can still dine like normal. Stormtroopers won’t harm me if I keep to myself.”

His hands find your forearms, holding them in desperation. “Darling, if you dine with me like normal, if you follow me around the city, Vader will know you are important. They’ll know how much you mean to me.”

A smile spreads across your features despite your worry. It’s been a long week of waking up early, letting Lando press one of the many plugs into your ass, going about your business meetings and fashion fittings, and then having Lando fuck the soul out of you every night. Sometimes you’d wander back to your room if you’re done quite early and Lando leaves to play a game of sabacc, which you’ve learned can accomplish more than business meetings often could. There wasn’t a title on what the two of you were, but you were certain he’d gladly call himself your boyfriend. And you’d gladly be his girlfriend. 

“You’re important, too,” you say. “But I guess you can’t hide away in your room.”

The smile he gives you is dripping in pity. “Darling, I’m sorry. But they shouldn’t be here long. At least, Vader shouldn’t.”

You sigh. He just wants you to be kept safe, how can you be mad? After all, he’s seen much more of the galaxy than you. There have been a lot of dangerous criminals come through Cloud City, and this is the first time he’s been properly worried. “Alright.”

His eyes light up. “What should we bring? Your sewing stuff? Fabrics?”

“Well,” you start. “Do you think the Empire will be here long? If not I could use a break but if they’re here for a while I’ll need to keep working…”

“Better safe than sorry darling,” he replies with a smile. “I have a threepio unit get on that. For now, though, let’s have one last lunch outside.” He offers his arm for you to take, and you do. 

Out on the little balcony there was a table set with sandwiches and other snacky things, along with different juices. Ever the gentleman, Lando pulls out a seat for you. When you sit, a small whimper escapes your lips. 

“Are you alright, beautiful?” Lando asks with a smirk. 

You roll your eyes at him. “Of course I am.” You feel heat rise to your cheeks at your shared secret. The secret? The dark red jeweled butt plug that Lando had worked into you earlier that day. You’d gotten used to it for the most part, but somethings still send shivers up your body and sounds out of your mouth. 

“Wanted to ask you something,” Lando says. 

“And what’s that?”

“You mentioned something the other night,” he starts. “About all three holes…”

“Lando!” you gasp, looking around for anyone who might’ve heard him. “Someone could hear you!”

He laughs a little. “Darling, there’s no one else out here. I promise.” You sigh, and motion your hand for him to continue. “I was thinking I could start looking for someone. You know to help fuc-”

“Lando!” You whisper-yell. “At least be quieter!”

He lowers his voice this time, “Someone to help fuck you. Unless you already had someone in mind?”

“I’m not sure,” you reply. “Not a friend or anything. Or someone who’s here too often, I wouldn’t want things to get weird.”

“Well, I’ll keep my eye out,” he says with a wink.

The lunch was nice, though somewhat bittersweet because of the Empire’s dark shadow that looms over the planet. But it also filled you with excitement. The mix of the plug pressing in your ass and the talk of a threesome had you on edge for the rest of the day. Well, most of the day. The first Imperial ships arrived at dusk, casting shadows over the usually bright planet. All of your essentials were moved into Lando’s room and so you spent your evening designing new clothes, working on orders, and scrolling through the news feeds to see what people were saying about the Empire’s presence. Of course, most of it was positive, but a few negative things slipped through the filtering. 

You were already exhausted from being in Lando’s room, but you knew he was under enough stress having to entertain the Empire without having to worry about you.

-

Lando’s mouth hurt from fake smiles. His voice ached from fake laughter. Finally, he slipped away from the Moffs and Admirals and other people who find themselves to be extremely important. Lando maintained Cloud City’s reputation, though. There was lots of drinking and gambling and fucking, and usually Lando would indulge, but he really did wish to be back in his room, with you, easing out the small plug for a larger one...what he wouldn’t give.

Instead, he slipped away into a darker corner that he thought was unoccupied. “If it isn’t Lando Calrissian,” a deep, modulated voice said from behind him.

Lando whipped around, cloak swishing violently. “What is a Mandalorian doing in Cloud City?”

“Bounty,” the Mandalorian replied. A lightbulb went off in Lando’s head. Maybe this bounty hunter could be the third in your threesome. Especially if he’s only here on work.

Lando held out his hand. “I’m Lando, though you already knew that.”

The Mandalorian shifted his blaster so he could take Lando’s hand. “Boba Fett.”

“Do you like Alderaanian toniray, Boba?” Boba nodded curtly. “Let me buy you a glass then. Gotta get some before it’s all gone.” With Alderaan destroyed not that long ago, toniray had become a hot commodity. And not one that Lando offered freely. However, he’d wine and dine anyone if it made you happy. 

“As you wish,” Boba said and Lando led the way to a private booth. Well, it would’ve been private if it weren’t for the stormtroopers stationed outside any secluded place that could be used to conspire. 

Lando tried to spark conversation with the Mandalorian over the glasses of the light blue liquor, but it did not work. Boba did not even remove his helmet. He’d brought a straw. “You know, it tastes better if you don’t have to suck it like that, it messes up the taste,” Lando had said but Boba obviously didn’t care. 

Eventually, they just sat and listened to the stormtroopers talk. Boba had said one thing, though, and it was, “They’re so dumb, it’s entertainment.” And, Maker, he was right. 

After some quite dumb debates over little things, one of the troopers said, “You know the female orgasm is a myth?”

“Huh?”

“Yeah. Read it on the ‘Net. In every species, too, not just humanoids.”

Lando turned to look at Boba, who also turned to look at Lando. Lando couldn’t see Boba, but he knew that Boba was, at the very least, grinning at these two idiots.

“You sure? I’m pretty sure I’ve made a girl come,” a trooper said.

The other trooper replied, “No, man, it’s, like science or something. I read it on the ‘Net.”

Lando turned to Boba and said, “I really didn’t think any men thought that.”

Boba nodded. “It’s a shame really, so many women don’t come,” he said matter-of-factly. 

“My girlfriend told me about that the first time we slept together,” Lando hoped you wouldn’t mind the oversharing if he brought back this hunk of a Mandalorian. “Fixed that, though.”

Boba chuckled. “Good,” he said. “Women deserve more than idiots like that can give them.”

Lando started testing the waters now. “She’s gorgeous, my girl. Beautiful when she comes. Beautiful when she squirms, too.”

“Yeah?”

Lando nodded, tipping the rest of the toniray down his throat. “In fact, she’d be willing to show you. If you wanted to see, of course.”

“You’re offering me a threesome?”

Lando nodded. “We’ve been talking about it. You seem like her type.” It was a lie, Lando didn’t know what your type was. The Mandalorian believed him.

“Well, where is she?”

“I’ll take you to her.”

-

You sat on the huge bed, watching some holovids when the door creaked open. You still wore the gold dress that hugged your chest and then flowed like a river down the rest of your body. “Lando!” 

“I have something to tell you, darling,” he says as you rush to hug him. You cocked your head. “I think I found our third person.”

“Oh?”

“He’s a Mandalorian named Boba,” Lando says. “He’s not necessarily nice but I’m pretty sure we can trust him. And I’m definitely sure he’ll make you feel good.”

You smile. “If you trust him, I trust him. Where is he?”

Lando motions to the door, and you open it. Standing there was a man clad in green Mandalorian armor, it’s seen better days, but it seems to have held up pretty good. He’s not super tall, but kriff he is imposing. The weapons on him alone are enough to intimidate but his entire aura is commanding. His presence is so similar to Lando’s yet so different.

“Hello, Princess,” Boba says. “Or should I say Baroness?”

He’s said all of seven words to you and you’re already at a loss for words. You knew Lando was a Baron or whatever, but you’d never thought much of it until now. 

“I’m not really a baron,” he says. “But she does like being called names.” Lando is beside you, an arm around your waist. “Alright, gorgeous, what are your limits for tonight?”

You bite your lip. “I’m not really sure. I mean, nothing too hardcore, but maybe just ask me before you do something?”

“I figured Calrissian would’ve shown you enough to know your limits,” Boba teases. 

You suddenly feel defensive. “He has- He has shown me a lot,” you babble, your face heating up. “Just haven’t arrived at my limits.”

Boba just nods and moves on. “Surely we aren’t going to fuck on a sofa?”

Lando chuckles and shakes his head. “Bed’s through here.” Lando leads the party through the door and whispers to you, “Remember, we can stop any time.” You nod and squeeze his hand.

Lando leaves your side for a moment to draw back the tapestry that covers the large mirror at the end of the bed. Meanwhile, Boba has made himself comfortable in a char near the foot of the bed. “Why don’t you hop up on the bed, little one,” Boba suggests, motioning his hand towards the bed.

You feel awkward hoisting yourself up on the large bed with Boba’s eyes boring into you. The visor of his helmet gives nothing away, and while the mystery turns you on, it also scares you. But if Lando trusts him…

“Gorgeous, darling,” Lando says with a warm smile. He climbs onto the bed behind you, pulling you to rest against his chest. “Let’s present you for our new friend, hmm?” He lifts your legs up over his, spreading your legs and hiking your dress up so much so that you’re sure Boba can see your bare pussy. 

“She is very pretty,” Boba remarks. And that’s all. He has sat the blaster on the floor next to him, and you count that as him getting comfortable. 

Lando hands are running over the smoothness of the dress, and he finally stops at your tits. “You want to show Boba your tits, darling?”

“Yes,” you whimper, glancing over at the dark visor. Kriff, you wish you could see his eyes. “Boba,” you say, and he perks up a little. “Could...Could you take your helmet off?”

Lando tuts. “You’re forgetting your manners, darling,” he says. 

“Boba could you please take your helmet off? Please?”

He nods. His fingers mess with clasps and then there is a hiss and then there is his face. He’s gorgeous, tanned, scarred skin, strong brows, and poorly trimmed curly hair. You smile at him, but all he does is nod. 

“Now I think we can show him your tits,” Lando murmurs. And you nod and whimper a please. Lando’s hands come to the straps of the dress and gently ease them down before easing the tight bodice over the well of your breasts down to your stomach.

As each breast pops free from the tight restrictions of the gown, you faintly hear Boba suck in a breath. “Gorgeous tits, mesh’la,” Boba murmurs. You don’t know what the foreign word means, but it makes you feel warm inside.

Lando presses a kiss to your temple as he squeezes your tits and teases your nipples. “He’s right, pretty girl,” Lando says. “Gorgeous.”

Lando’s hand runs from your breast down to your stomach, pushing the dress even further down. He’s looking at you like one of the many art pieces he’s acquired over the years. “Bounty hunters like Fett don’t know how to appreciate works of art like I do, sweetheart.” His hand runs up to your breast again, tweaking a nipple and smiling when you gasp.

“And little rich boy love-makers like Calrissian,” Boba says, standing from the chair. “Don’t know how to give them a good fuck.”

You can’t help but giggle at the two men bickering over who could treat you the best. You’re not sure your body can handle it. 

“Then why don’t you show me,” Lando says. “Show me how to give her a good fuck then.”

“Gladly,” Boba smirks, approaching the bed. “Move out of our way, Calrissian.” Lando moves from his place behind you to sit beside you, watching with awe at how Boba approached. 

“Let’s get you out of this flimsy little thing,” Boba says, and you lift your hips so he can pull the dress all the way off. He tosses the gold fabric over his shoulder without a care in the galaxy. “So kriffing pretty,” Boba says, running a hand over your stomach to your hip and giving you a squeeze. “Your boyfriend was telling me some filthy things about you, princess.” 

Your breath grows ragged as you think about Lando and Boba discussing your sex. “Oh?”

“Mhm. Told me you’re pretty when you squirm,” Boba’s gloved hands were starting to warm up on your skin, as he continued to rub the skin of your hip. “I’d like to see you squirm.” 

You arch your back up, trying to push your tits up so that he’d touch them. “Mesh’la, you’re already so desperate,” he tuts. “She always this fucking needy?” He asks Lando.

Lando’s hand comes to pet your hair. “Always. I have a little trick, though.” Boba raises an eyebrow. “Turn her over and find out, Fett. You’re supposed to be the teacher, not me.”

With curious hands, Boba helps you turn onto your belly. “What’s your boyfriend’s little trick, mesh’la?” He asks, gently rubbing the globes of your ass. “Can I spank you, little one?”

“Please,” you whisper. 

And he does. He lands a fairly soft smack to your ass, but you felt it deep inside, thanks to the plug. “Hmm,” Boba pretends to think. “I think he’s plugged you up, am I right?” You whine, and Boba’s hands are spreading your ass. Nestled between your cheeks is a gorgeous dark red jewel, and Boba groans at the sight. “Very pretty jewel,” Boba says, applying some pressure to the plug and gently moving it around. “However, I think you’re matching your boyfriend.” Of course Boba had noticed your coordination with Lando’s capes. 

“Coincidence,” Lando laughs.

Boba shakes his head. “I wasn’t born yesterday. We’re going to have to change that, little one. Got any dark green plugs?” 

“She’s got every color,” Lando smiles as he goes to retrieve the box of plugs. And when he returns and presents them to Boba, he chuckles. 

“You’re both dirty things, aren’t you,” he says, selecting the medium sized emerald green plug from the box. “Grab her some lube, Calrissian,” he commands.

You clench your thighs in anticipation. It’s really starting, now. “Gonna take this out of you, mesh’la,” Boba murmurs against your back. “That ok?” He presses a few opened mouth kisses as you whimper a yes, and then his hands fly to the plug. He grasps the rounded jewel and gently eases it out of you, twisting and teasing a little along the way. 

Lando returns with the lube as Boba spreads your ass cheeks again, “Look at that tight hole,” Boba says. “Stretching it little by little.” 

“She’s doing so good training her asshole,” Lando praises. “Gonna take my cock one day, isn’t that right, sweetheart?”

“Maker, yes,” you respond, voice breathy and needy. 

Lando is back beside you as you hear the bottle of lube open. “Ready for a bigger plug?”

“Yes,” you whimper.

Lando pets your hair again and whispers, “Manners, darling. That’s no way to treat a guest.” 

“Yes, please,” you correct and as soon as the last syllable leaves your mouth, you feel the cool lube on your hole. “Please,” you whine a little louder this time.

“Patience is a virtue, mesh’la,” Boba teases, but you don't have to wait long before the tip of the plug nudges against the tight muscle. “Gonna split you open, mesh’la,” he says as he pushes the plug deeper, and finally your hole closes around it and the rest of the way is easy. “Much better,” he says, tossing the dark red plug to Lando. 

Boba’s leather gloves are back on your hips, manhandling you back onto your back. “Open your mouth, princess,” he commands, and you obey. He slips a finger in your mouth, and you swirl your tongue around it. You can only describe the taste as leather with a hint of Boba, some kind of musk from the underbelly of the galaxy that you’ve never visited. “Bite down.” You do, and he pulls his hand from the glove, leaving just the leather in your mouth. He takes the glove and tosses it to join your dress, and then has you repeat it with the other. 

“Now, go give your lover a blowjob, princess,” he says. “Put that pretty mouth to use.” You obey, crawling up towards Lando who was already freeing himself from his pants. He was hard, precum already leaking and you ached to have him inside you. “Go on, mesh’la,” Boba encourages. “Suck Calrissian’s cock like a good girl.”

You pump Lando’s cock with your hand a few times before taking his head in your mouth, sucking softly. Your knees are folded under you, and you go to move, but Boba holds you in place. You gasp around Lando’s cock as something wet touches your clit. It’s Boba’s tongue. 

“Boba,” you moan, popping off of Lando’s cock. 

“No, no,” Boba reprimands. “Don’t let me distract you. I told you to be a good girl and suck Calrissian’s cock.”

You nod and return to Lando, taking his cock as far down your throat it would go without gagging. Boba also returns to his ministrations, and as you moan around Lando’s cock, his hand tightens in your hair. “So pretty with a cock in your mouth,” Lando praises. “Making me feel so good. Such a good girl.” 

You continue sucking Lando’s cock, swirling your tongue around the tip while your hand strokes his shaft. Boba’s slow licks to your cunt bring you closer and closer to the edge, the pace impossibly measured. You try to grind down on Boba’s face but his hands quickly move to hold you in place, his tongue never missing a beat. You slip Lando’s cock out of your mouth to whimper, “I’m going to come!”

Boba’s tongue is gone just as quickly as it came. “Not yet, mesh’la,” he says. “We want to see you squirm.” 

Lando strokes your cheek. “You gonna be good and not come until Boba lets you?” You nod. “Alright, good girl, ask Boba what he wants you to do next.”

“What do you want me to do next, Boba?” You ask quietly, growing shy again. 

Boba grabs your chin, tilting your head up to look at him. “I want you to suck my cock now, pretty girl.” He relaxes back against the pillows now, shedding the codpiece of his armor to reveal his bulge. “What do you want Calrissian to do, mesh’la?” You tear your eyes away from the outline of Boba’s cock to look at Lando. 

“Will you finger me, please?” 

“Since you asked so nicely,” Lando says with a smirk.

You turn back to Boba, who has finally freed his cock from his pants. And kriff  he is huge. He’s average length, but he’s so fucking thick. Lando is longer, though not as thick. “I don’t think staring constitutes good manners,” Boba taunts. 

You swallow as you bend down to take him in your mouth. You work your lips around him, already feeling so stretched. You almost forgot that you’d asked Lando to finger you, but as he spreads your thighs apart you remember. “Your pussy is swollen, pretty girl,” he says. “Barely gotten any attention and she’s already swollen, Fett.”

“She’s a needy little slut, aren’t you, mesh’la?” You hum around his cock and then truly moan as Lando works two fingers inside your dripping hole. 

“I think I prefer the red plug,” Lando says as he pumps his fingers in and out of you. 

Boba’s hand is buried in your hair now, pulling harder than Lando would. “Funny, Calrissian,” he says, and then groans as you whine around his cock. “But green is obviously her color.” Boba starts guiding you on his cock, never making you take him too deep. It’s almost as if he can read your mind. Especially as you started to think you couldn’t do it anymore, your jaw was getting sore, and Boba pulled you off him. “Good girl,” he praises. “Are you close to coming?”

“Almost,” you whine, pushing back on Lando’s fingers. He curls them in just the right spot and you moan, “Lando, please, please, please,” as he keeps pushing his fingers right into that spot, over and over. 

“You want to come, pretty girl?” He asks, and you frantically nod. “Then you’d better beg Boba.” 

You turn your attention back to Boba. You study his face, the slight curl of his lips, the wide bridge of his nose, the crinkles by his eyes. You stare so intently into his dark eyes and beg, “Please Boba, please can I come? I’ll be so good, I promise, please,” your babbling gets more and more incoherent as you continue but you don’t care. You want to come so bad. 

He tilts his head, offers you a smile of pity, and says. “No. You cannot.” Lando’s fingers slip out of you and you collapse onto the bed. “But you can take my cock in that pretty little cunt.” 

You whine at the thought, the idea of the stretch of his cock, of the release it would bring. But you know he will deny you again. “If it’s too much, tell us,” Lando says, and Boba hums in agreement.

“Not too much,” you say. “Wanna take Boba’s cock like a good girl.” 

Lando helps you onto your hands and knees, and Boba makes his way to your ass. Lando caresses your face with a smooth hand. “There’s my good girl.” 

“Alright, mesh’la, here we go,” Boba says. Your mouth hangs open as he pushes in, the stretch bigger than anything you’d felt, and while he couldn’t reach the same spots as Lando, he’d found his own. “So fucking tight, wow,” he groans as he bottoms out. “You want to know how to fuck, Calrissian? This is how you fuck,” Boba drags his cock out slowly before slamming back into you. 

“Boba!” You cry, and you can already feel him pulling out again. You brace yourself on Lando as Boba slams into you again, mouth hanging open and drool pooling on your tongue. 

Lando coos, “So good, baby, so good.” Lando is on his knees in front of you, holding his cock in hand, and says, “I’m going to put my cock in your mouth, gorgeous, since it’s hanging open so pretty.” 

The only response you can muster is a nod as Boba relentlessly fucks into you. It’s so different from Lando, and you liked it, but you ached to have Lando’s fast yet gentle strokes. Not that you were opposed to coming on Boba’s cock, of course. 

Lando being back in your mouth gave you a thrill. All three holes. You felt full, to say the least. The feeling intensified when you moaned, barely able to hear it because of Lando’s cock and the slapping of Boba’s skin against yours. You felt your release coming, again, as Boba slapped your ass. “Take cock so well,” he grunts. “So -nngh- fucking good!”

Boba’s hand is in your hair, and he pulls your mouth off Lando’s length. “Don’t you fucking come, pretty thing. Not yet.” 

You let out your loudest, most pathetic moan of the night as Boba gives one final thrust and then pulls out quickly. You thought the next thing you’d feel was his cum on your ass, but you don’t. “Get back here and make your girl come, Calrissian,” Boba demands. Lando and Boba switch spots, Boba’s thick cock back in front of you. “Lando’s gonna stuff your pussy with cum, and I’m going to fill your mouth, mesh’la.”

You feel Lando’s head against your hole. “Going to be such a good cumslut, aren’t you sweetheart?” 

“Yes,” you whine. “Yes!” And then you’re full. Again. Boba gives a shallow thrust into your mouth and Lando sinks himself into your cunt. Your moans are muffled again, but this time there are more, they’re needier. 

“Listen to her, Fett,” Lando says. “Adorable little whines.”

“Pathetic moans,” Boba corrects. “For a needy little girl.” 

The filthy words are too much, Lando’s consistent, deep, and yet somehow gentle thrusts are too much, the stretch of Boba’s cock in your mouth is too much. You try to warn them that you’re going to come, and miraculously, Boba understands. “Go on,” he coos. “Come around our cocks. Make us fill you with cum.”

And you do. You come in a mess of whines and muffled begging, squirming towards Lando but not wanting to move from Boba. Your body shakes with the orgasm, toes curling, fingers gripping the nice duvet. You finally regain some of your senses to hear the two men moaning. All because of you.

“Ready to take my cum?” Lando grunts, and before you know it you can feel him spill inside you, coating your walls so deliciously. You don’t know what it is about Boba that brought out the rougher, meaner side of Lando, but it was amazing.

And then it’s Boba’s turn, “Going to come, mesh’la,” he moans, and then your mouth is full. You’re so full. Boba slips out of your mouth. Both men are sitting back on their haunches, regaining their breath as you flop onto your side. Fucked out and full of cum. “Show me,” Boba murmurs, and you do, opening your mouth and showing him his load on your tongue before you swallow it. Once it’s gone from your mouth you open again. “So good,” he praises. 

Both men get off the bed, Lando helps you down off the bed for a moment. “Let me turn the sheets down, darling,” he says. You give him a blissed out smile, and his heart feels like it’s going to explode. Kriff, he’d employ Boba and do this every night if he could keep that fucked-out smile on your face. 

Just as Lando helps you up under the covers, Boba returns with a towel, damp on one side. “Here you go, mesh’la, let’s clean you up.” He wipes some of the cum from your thighs, then the cum from your chin. “There you go, princess,” he says, getting back up to take the towel to a basket. 

“Let’s take that plug out, pretty girl,” Lando coos, and you turn onto your side, allowing him access to your ass. As he eases the plug out of you, he apologizes everytime you wince. Finally, the plug is out and on the nightstand and you feel empty. You whine. 

“Hey, shh,” Lando comforts. “Give us a moment, we’ll come cuddle you.”

“We?” Boba asks.

“You gonna pump and run?”

Boba shakes his head. “Most people prefer that.”

“Not us,” Lando says as he starts to strip down to his boxers. 

Boba tries to conceal his smile. No one’s ever wanted him to stay the night before. And sometimes he didn’t have enough credits for that long. “Alright then,” Boba replies, starting to unclasp his armor. He’s not sure if it’s the warmth in Lando’s smile or the warmth of your pussy that makes him feel like he can trust the two of you, but he relishes the feeling, because tomorrow when finally secures Han Solo, he probably won’t be seen as a friend anymore.

Eventually, after lots of armor clanking on the ground, you’re nestled between the two men. Your head is on Lando’s chest, Boba’s head is on your belly, his arms wrapped around you, holding you close. You can tell the Mandalorian hasn’t felt too many soft touches, and your heart aches for him. Under his scars and his muscles, he’s a softy, you can feel it. 

“I love you, sweetheart,” Lando murmurs against your head. “I’m glad we got to do this.”

“I love you, too, Lando,” you reply. “And thank you, Boba. I think it’s safe to say you’re always welcome in Cloud City, if you want to stay. Or, at least, pay us another visit.”

Boba wishes he could. But the knowledge that you wouldn't say that if you knew he was here by a tip from Lord Vader himself or that he’d be capturing and probably killing one of Lando’s oldest friends. “As you wish, princess,” is all he can muster before he lets himself succumb to the warmth and comfort that he gets to have tonight.

@delusionsxfgrandeur @hansonveggieclub @fuckyeahbeskar @tibbietibbs !!

[andorlorian]

a little bit insane ahsoka and luke au

the lovely @picazos-angsty-typist inspired me to just post my au ideas as opposed to giving them away, and this one is my absolute favorite! it's an au in which 19 year old ahsoka finds the time travel crystal from the lego star wars christmas special and is transported onto tatooine right before a new hope. then she gets to go along through the original trilogy and be best friends with luke! (this is honestly just an extremely convoluted way to get my favorite characters to be best friends. this au is for me <3.) extremely long elaborations and plot stuff in bullet points under the cut:

okay so 19 year old ahsoka! it would be about 2 years post order 66 and about 6-8 months since the ending of the ahsoka novel, so she's traveling the world and doing fulcrum things, attempting to build a rebellion with bail organa. this, naturally, means she needs to hide from the empire.

because it needs to be life day for the crystal to work, that's the day this all starts (in ahsoka's original timeline). ahsoka finds out randomly that it's life day, and has a moment remembering the day before order 66, before the empire. 

she gets into a skirmish with the empire close by kordoku, the planet with the time travel stone on it. she feels a pull from the force, like there's a safe haven on the planet below, so she lands and immediately knows why: she's in front of a jedi temple. she knows she'll be safe inside from the empire. she walks in, and seals the temple with the force

she picks up the weird rock thing in the middle of the room, as it's singing to her through the force. the second she touches it, a wormhole opens up, and she's dropped directly in the middle of a tatooinian sandstorm.

we the audience know that she's time traveled, but ahsoka has no clue. and as I'm assuming she doesn't have much experience wandering ancient abandoned jedi temples (in her time, very recently, they'd been populated and upkept), she wouldn't suspect she was hallucinating. she assumed the rock somehow teleported her, but the sand and the wind of the sandstorm make it impossible for her to find the rock. where before it had been singing to her through the force, she couldn't feel anything now.

she has no choice but to try and find shelter from the storm and wait it out. she finds a sort of cave, a small hideout, so she sets up her small camp. having nothing else to do, she opens herself up to the force to meditate, hoping to locate the rock and find more information about her new situation. however, she instead discovers something she wasn't expecting: the faint and utterly familiar force prescence of one obi-wan kenobi

it feels damaged and weak, almost as if he'd cut himself off from the force somewhat, but there was no denying that it was obi-wan. ahsoka thanked the force for sending her to the rock, as she assumes it had just sent her to obi-wan and nothing else.

during this force meditation, she also discovers the planet that she's on is tatooine. this heavily reminds her of anakin, hearing echoes of their conversation as they crossed the desert from what seems like a million years ago. 

once the storm settles, she makes her way through the tatooinian desert, and just as the suns are coming up and she knows she would need to find shelter, she happens upon the Lars farm.

she meets Owen and Beru Lars and their nephew, Luke. they are kind and good people, and do not hesitate to offer ahsoka a place to stay + some food and water. ahsoka rests up somewhat, but insists on helping them in return.

this part I haven't quite nailed out yet. tatooine side quest featuring ahsoka and luke doing whatever one does on a moisture farm. I assume ahsoka would offer technological help as she's a good mechanic (perks of master skywalker) so maybe they're going around and fixing vaporators?

that day and into the night, she and luke really hit it off. she learns more about tatooine and more about how they've been affect by the war. however from the way luke talks about it, the empire has been around as long as he can remember. this strikes ahsoka as extremely odd, and wonders what else is going on, but fixing things doesn't leave much room for another galaxy warping revelation, so she doesn't dwell on it immediately.

she and luke discuss kind of everything. they become buddies bc that's important to me. the next day, she tells them she's looking for obi-wan kenobi. "do you know someone named obi-wan kenobi?" luke does his little "do you think she means old ben kenobi?" number which is fun n nostalgic hehe.

owen seems to freeze. he hasn't heard that name in quite some time, and it doesn't exactly conjure pleasant memories. he reluctantly agrees to let luke point her in the right direction, and she buys a speeder from them (they try to give it to her but she insists on paying. ahsoka ftw)

ahsoka manages to avoid the tuskens on her way into the jundland wastes and runs into.... this really old dude. this is when she really has to confront the time travel of it all. she and obi-wan have a Talk. there's still a little bad blood between them considering obi-wan was on the council that condemned her without remorse or apology, but they're both so relieved to see the other alive.

ahsoka learns that it's been 19 years since order 66, since the empire took over. she remembers the day it happened, what only feels like 2 years ago to her.

she mentions that luke helped her find him, and obi-wan freezes. this obviously gets noticed by ahsoka, and obi-wan drops the real bomb on her: luke is anakin and padmé's son. obi-wan tells her that anakin died in order 66 and padmé died with the rebellion, that he's here both to hide out and to protect luke. she remarks in her head that the whole chosen one thing is ridiculous, that pinning the entire galaxy's hopes on a nineteen year old kid that up until now obi-wan has refused to even CONSIDER training (skywalker trauma lolz) but she can sense the strong emotions from him, that he wouldn't have it in him to stand up to the empire alone, so she drops it.

as to how padmé died: i hate the way that she dies in the prequels so I am deleting it. this is my canon. she actually survives and stays with the rebellion for a good 3-5 years before she's killed in a rebel vs. empire conflict. ahsoka is especially devastated to learn about her death from obi-wan (who bail organa risked communication with to tell him, as he was also close with padmé). 

she and obi-wan spar, both to get Ahsoka's mind off of the everything about this situation and because it's been so long since either of them have been around another jedi. it's cathartic for both of them. (ahsoka beats obi-wan easily btw haha)

obi-wan offers to officially knight her as a jedi knight, as that was what the council had intended after the whole fiasco and he says "you're just as experienced and powerful as I was when I was knighted." but ahsoka declines. she isn't ready to be considered a jedi yet, and may never be.

this is when a new hope really starts. obi-wan and ahsoka find luke unconscious in the jundland wastes, and that sequence goes pretty much the same. r2 is beeping and trilling like crazy because ahsoka!!!!!! that's one of his best friends!!!!!!! luke is like "you know this droid?" and ahsoka freezes, because how exactly does she explain to the nice dude she met yesterday that actually she's from 17 years in the past and was very close with both of his parents, who both were extremely close to r2?

she does in fact explain all of that to him when they get to obi-wan's house. she has no idea how she got here or why, but she did know anakin skywalker and padmé amidala naberrie, and tells him as much as she remembers about them. luke misses both of his parents like an ache in his chest, wishing more than anything he could have known them. 

obi-wan offers his own perspective on it, and tells how anakin died (which ahsoka is just as eager to know). obi-wan, on the spot, says that another jedi fell to the dark side and joined sidious, and that anakin died defending the temple. (he obviously couldn't say that vader was his pupil, because ahsoka would see through that immediately.)

luke asks why he couldn't have lived with his mother in the rebellion, but obi-wan says that she wanted him to be safe from the galactic conflict and stay with anakin's family. (which is partially true, but the whole sith-sensing-the-overly-powerful-skywalkers was a big factor as well.) obi-wan says he's truly sorry that luke never got to know her.

after learning about the message r2 brought, ahsoka knows she has to get to the rebellion however possible and rejoin the fight. obi-wan agrees, and gives his little elevator pitch to luke about becoming a jedi and joining the rebellion. when obi-wan gives luke the lightsaber, a million memories with anakin flash through ahsoka's head. luke still comes to same conclusion at the end of that conversation: he's willing to guide them out of tatooine, but he can't join the galactic conflict, at least not now. 

however, as they're leaving, they find the destroyed jawa crawler. luke, as before, realizes it means the stormtroopers found his family. ahsoka knows that only despair waits there for him, and urges him not to go, but when he doesn't back down hops in the speeder with him (for protection and emotional support). 

luke gets to have more emotions about the fact that the empire killed his /entire family./ ahsoka doesn't try and use it to convince him to go, only offers to help him bury them. she openly uses the force to move things around and make things easier, while luke is still in shock, almost numb. they're buried next to shmi and cliegg. 

luke is ANGRY at the empire. he is PISSED. he decides to go with them to fight not because he longs for adventure, but because he wants to hit the empire where it hurts. ahsoka can recognize that isn't the thought process of a jedi, but she feels the exact same way after learning about anakin and padmé. 

now it's mos eisley time. i feel like han would definitely like/admire ahsoka at first, but ahsoka would not like him. she finds him deplorable and a little annoying, and joins in on the whole bagging on the falcon jokes. this leads to han getting his feelings hurt and he's like fine :( we are not friends then >:(. 

the interesting thing is that chewie and ahsoka actually know each other! they were both kidnapped by bossk and hunted for sport in that one clone wars arc, so they're both like "oh hey person who was there for one of the most terrifying and traumatic times in my life! what's up!" they become fast friends yet again, and chewie is like "wow you did not age at all. are you sure you're not a wookiee?"

on the millennium falcon, she and obi-wan get started on luke's training. he asks her about his parents constantly (what they were like, what they did, where they came from, etc). she also talks about what the jedi were like (providing a less rose-colored-glasses perspective, but still with a lot of positives). 

she feel the same pain obi-wan does right before they get to alderaan, and can feel bail and breha organa in particular (having known them fairly well after the ahsoka novel). 

they get pulled into the death star's tractor beam. ahsoka can feel the cold and horrible presence of vader, a sick dread building in her the closer they get to it. they go to hide under the floorboards of the falcon. han knows how the empire operates better than anyone, which ahsoka is shocked to learn is much different than the Republic or the empire she remembers. (i imagine she lived in a more transitional period, so while the empire was terrible during her time, they were only getting started.)

she tries to go with obi-wan to shut off the power beam, but obi-wan still does his "I must go alone" little number. sensing the end of something, but not what it is, she hugs him goodbye. he's still obi-wan and she missed him dreadfully. he tells her to protect luke. 

she along with luke refuses to indulge han's obi-wan slander, and when han says "great at getting us into trouble!" she says "you should have met anakin."

then it's princess rescue time as it should be. that goes exactly the same except ahsoka is much better at defending them from the stormtroopers lol. leia still does the blasting and "somebody has to save our skins!" line because I love that

ahsoka can tell immediately that leia is padmé's daughter. she had probably heard of leia, being in the rebellion for about six months before time traveling, but now having met her it's completely obvious. she doesn't vocalize this immediately though, planning to discuss it with obi-wan. 

yes I'm keeping the garbage monster scene because I think it's funny :)

ahsoka goes with han and chewie after the stormtroopers while luke and leia head for the ship. also ahsoka + han banter because I think it's funny

she can see obi-wan and vader's fight (which I'm hoping will be a lot more like their fight in rots. a new hope is incredible but the lightsaber fights got way better as time went on. their final fight deserves to be epic). she tries to run and help obi-wan but luke pulls her back. "he can handle it," he says. "we need you to help us get to the falcon."

however when obi-wan is killed, both of them are distraught. his voice appears in ahsoka's head, telling her not to face vader yet, telling her to run. chewie literally has to hold her back and carry her to the ship. 

they blast their way out of the death star, none of them having the time to dwell on what just happened. 

ahsoka and luke are both numb. luke lost 3 parental figures in one day, and obi-wan's death after going through order 66 just brings it allll up again. leia is also hanging out in the numb dead parents circle, because her entire planet got blown up today and obi-wan's death just feels like another nail in the coffin. all three of them can sort of feel each other's emotions, and unconsciously they're comforting each other with the force. it's a healing moment for all three of them

han is kind of awkwardly standing in the background. "there wasn't anything any of you could have done," he says, in a rare show of emotion. (i like han wanting to help them despite his i-don't-care-about-anything facade.)

this doesn't stop him from saying he's only in it for the money later though. leia gets to blow up at him about it same as in the movie because she deserves it methinks.

they make it to the rebellion, and a few of the people who've been in it from the beginning recognize her (mon mothma maybe?). I also like the idea of ahsoka being something of rebellion legend, having been one of the last jedi who presumably died fighting the empire for the rebellion. 

also general hera syndulla gets to be there bc i love her. she is the one who shows the plans to the pilots and explains the plan. she also references the rogue one crew because i love them also. 

ahsoka in an x-wing with the red team attempting to blow up the death star. when vader makes an appearance, she can sense him in the starfighter nearby them, the same cold and evil presence. she personally goes to fight vader and defends the rest of the team from him, somehow falling into a perfect rhythm and anticipating every move. she doesn't kill him obviously, but she gets close. the things that happen stay the same: they sustain heavy casualties, she survives the battle, han comes back to save the day, luke is the one who blows up the death star.

luke, han, chewie, and ahsoka get medals in the end, because each of them were instrumental in the blowing up of the death star (and a lot more pilots survive thanks to Ahsoka's defense). there are references to the phineas and ferb star wars special because I want it. 

there's a bit after the official end of a new hope in which she's talking to Luke like "I can't stay. this isn't my timeline. I have to go back. and if I can go back, maybe I can try and save the jedi. maybe I can fix things." however luke changes her mind. "maybe you're in this timeline for a reason. maybe NOW is when you can change things. I would've died without you in the battle of yavin. plus, how am I supposed to become a jedi without you?" luke + leia + han + chewie + r2 + 3po all convince her to stay. they are all very attached to ahsoka at this point, and ahsoka realizes she doesn't really want to leave them either.

also. because the battle is over and they all have a moment to breathe, she tells leia that she's positive she's padmé and anakin's daughter too, not just because of the physical resemblence but also her force sensitivity. there's no doubt about it.

ahsoka agrees to train both of them in what she knows, though she warns that she wasn't a master or even a knight.

it ends with the whole crew hanging out on the falcon (han, leia, luke, chewie, r2, c-3po, and ahsoka)

those are my bullet points for the episode IV section of this! if people want to see where this goes in the rest of the trilogy let me know I have so many notes about this au

also tagging: @togrutanduin @padme--amygdala @bisexualobiwanrights @grimthejedisith @senator-nahberries you get to watch me lose my mind in real time <3

[glimmerglanger]

Whumptober 2020 - Day 15

Part 15 of the oof!au. (One part left! And it’s really more of an epilogue than a full chapter, so). It’s been a long haul and I have plans for a sequel (and some snippets that might go INTO the sequel). 

General Information: Post Order 66 Vader-Captures-Obi-Wan AU. Eventual happy(ish) ending. Codywan. Past one-sided Vaderwan.

WARNINGS: Past torture, non-con, and mind control. Attempt at suicide and discussions of suicide. Mental and emotional trauma. 

Alt 10. Nightmares

 Cody stiffened down his spine when Rex and Ahsoka came back onboard the Recompense. It should have been good to see one of his brothers again - to see another Jedi - but he hadn’t managed to be happy about it when they showed up. They were just another factor, something he couldn’t control, something he didn’t know how to predict.

And then Ahsoka had told Obi-Wan he should have done a better job saving kriffing Skywalker and--

Cody didn’t even know they were back on the Recompense until they turned around the corner that led to Obi-Wan’s room. It was, technically, morning. Cody’d slept a bit, on his feet. He’d tried, once or twice, to go bunk down, but…

But he never managed to keep his eyes closed very long, worries about Obi-Wan across the ship, in a room by himself, eating away at him if he tried. He could snag a few clicks of sleep leaning against the wall, confident he’d wake up if anything happened.

Usually, it was the sounds Obi-Wan made in his quarters that woke Cody.

He screamed, sometimes, in his sleep.

Rex and Ahsoka woke him, coming down the hall. He blinked to wakefulness, pushing away from the wall, glad he’d stayed close even as Ahsoka’s steps faltered. “Commander,” she said, glancing towards Rex and then back at him. She grimaced, looking miserable before she added, “I’m sorry. I didn’t--I’m just sorry. I wanted to…” she gestured at the door to Obi-Wan’s room. “Apologize.”

“He’s asleep,” Cody said, because Force knew Obi-Wan wasn’t sleeping enough - none of them were sleeping enough - and he wouldn’t interrupt that.

Ahsoka’s expression tensed further, mouth twisting and pressing thin. She shifted her weight from foot to foot, and said, softly, “He’s--not really, it’s…” She clenched and unclenched her hands, and said, raw, “It would be a kindness to wake him. But I - I may be able to help. Let him sleep better.”

Cody’d listened to Obi-Wan wake himself up screaming or - worse, somehow - trying to swallow screams back, for far too long. He swore, under his breath, and said, stepping forward to open the door, “Do it, then.”

Ahsoka didn’t hesitate, sliding into the room, the light flowing in around her. Obi-Wan was tangled in the sheets on his little bunk, jerking, just a little, making sounds too quiet to carry through the door, awful sounds, and--

“Sh,” Ahsoka said, sitting on the edge of the bunk, stretching a hand out, palm over his forehead. “Sh, sh, Master, it’s only a dream.”

Cody stood in the doorway, gripping the frame of it, and shivered down his back, watching Obi-Wan slowly go still, his breathing getting even and deeper, some of the lines around his eyes and mouth easing. His face was wet, catching the light, though his eyes remained closed as he settled.

Ahsoka didn’t make any move to get up off the bed or to take away her hand. She’d closed her eyes as well, expression set with determination. Cody wondered what, exactly, she was doing, but it hardly mattered.

It was helping. He could see it helping, soothing Obi-Wan in a way none of them had been able to accomplish. They’d found assistance. Someone to help, and--and Cody had promised - to himself - that he’d get his brothers and Obi-Wan out. That he’d save them.

He looked at Ahsoka, murmuring soft words with a lilting cadence, and realized that, perhaps, he’d done it. He exhaled shakily, turned on his heel, and walked away. 

# 

Rex waited, for a while, in the doorway to Kenobi’s quarters. He’d never seen Ahsoka soothe someone through a nightmare from this perspective before. He knew she’d done it for him, after - after the world fell apart. He’d woken up more than once to find his head resting against her leg, her palm cool over his forehead, all his nightmares kept away, at least for a few hours.

She had nightmares, too. He soothed them as best he could, without the benefit of the Force.

He lacked the ability to help soothe Kenobi, and he was fairly certain that if he made a move towards the bed he’d end up regretting it. Cody hadn’t been the only one of his brothers lingering around in the hall. They were all watching him, assessingly. He nodded, decided to leave the door open so they could keep an eye on their General, and took a breath.

He couldn’t help with Kenobi’s nightmares, but he’d seen the look on Cody’s face, before he left. It didn’t take more than a question to get a location for Cody’s quarters. Rex braced himself and went to find his brother.

Rex expected Cody’s door to be locked, when he arrived, but it opened at his touch. The space within was lit, revealing the little bunk and Cody, sitting on it, back to the door. Rex bit his tongue, hard, because Cody didn’t even turn to look at him, just...stared forward, blaster in hand and resting on his thigh.

Rex said, softly, “Hey, there.”

“Rex,” Cody said, voice flat and empty. He kept staring forward, even as Rex edged a step into the room, heart slamming against his ribs, blood burning in his veins. Rex had… anticipated something like this, after talking to Cody and the others in the mess.

He could remember, too easily, what had happened after they rescued Bly, after they pulled the chip out of his head, walking into his room the next morning and--and Rex hadn’t managed to get Ahsoka turned away before she saw the wall--

“Thought maybe we could grab some breakfast,” Rex said, with forced lightness. He’d made it far enough in to get a look at Cody’s expression and it was terrible. Blank and fixed, his face streaked with tears.

“You go ahead,” Cody said, and he had his finger curled around the trigger of the blaster, Rex noted, the cold in his gut spreading further. They’d all been trained, indoctrinated, not to draw their blaster unless they planned to shoot something.

“No, I’ll wait for you.” Rex shifted another step closer. He wondered, vaguely, if he could wrestle the blaster away. Cody had always been stronger than him, but Cody didn’t look up to struggling with anyone, at the moment. Then again, he knew better than most how stubborn his brothers could be, when they wanted to do something badly enough.

And he knew that Cody had - had broken that thing in his head, to get his way. He’d obviously lost none of his stubborn drive over the last three years.

Rex took another step, wetted his lips, and said, soft, “Why don’t you give that to me?”

Cody shook his head. He said, “I want you to look after him.”

“Yeah?” Rex edged nearer, close enough that he could grab Cody’s arm, if necessary. He didn’t bother asking who him was. They both knew. Everyone on the ship knew. Kriff, everyone in the galaxy with eyes knew. “You know, he wants you looking after him.”

Cody made a short, sharp sound. He said, “No.”

Rex flexed his fingers in and out, tried to tell himself it was a good sign that Cody was willing to talk to him, that he hadn’t just jerked his arm up and pulled the trigger. He picked his words carefully, wishing he were better at this kind of thing. “He does. Come on. Give it to me, please. Don’t do this to him.”

Cody blinked, for the first time. “I’m doing this for him.”

Rex shuddered, down his back. He wished, for just a click, that Skywalker was still alive, just so Rex could make him pay for what he’d done. “He’s not going to appreciate it,” he said, quiet. “You know that. Ahsoka said he’s already blaming himself for what happened. He’ll blame himself, every day, if you do this. It’ll be more pain. More nightmares.”

Cody’s breath hitched, and Rex could identify a weak spot when he saw one. Kriff, everyone had always known where Cody’s was. Rex touched Cody’s shoulder, soft, and said, “He needs help, handling what happened. The Jedi - they’re like us, not meant to be alone. He needs--”

“Not from me,” Cody snapped back, quickly, more life coming into his voice.

Rex drew in a breath, trying to play this correctly. “Ahsoka says she can tell he--”

“Not from me,” Cody cut in, gritting the words out, each one bitten off, snapped. “I enjoyed it,” he added, gutted. “What I did. To him.”

Rex almost recoiled back, restraining the urge at the last moment. He tried to imagine the possibility of the words being true and found he couldn’t. “No,” he said, firm, “you didn’t.”

Cody looked up at him, finally, his eyes wide and full of bottomless anger and guilt. He snarled, “You weren’t there. I--” 

“You want to do it again, then?” Rex cut in, because they were getting somewhere, dragging Cody out of his head, out of whatever terrible pit he’d fallen into. And because the words needed said, probably. He continued, the words tearing like glass in his throat, even just saying them making his stomach ache with disgust, while Cody stared at him, “You could, you know. He looks like a strong breeze would knock him down. You could walk into his quarters right now and hold him down and--”

The wall caught Rex’s shoulders and the back of his head when Cody surged to his feet and shoved him back, hard. Rex saw stars, terribly aware of the fact that Cody was still holding the blaster, of Cody’s hand, pressed hard against his chest. Cody snarled, eyes blazing, “Don’t you kriffing ever--”

“See?” Rex cut in, ignoring the pain, because getting Cody fully off the ledge he’d thrown himself onto was more important than a headache. Possibly a concussion.“You don’t want to. You never wanted to. Va--Skywalker raped him.” He stared across into Cody’s eyes, and gentled his voice. “Raped you, too, Cody.”

Cody flinched, looking to the side and keeping his hand where it was, terrible strength in him, for all that he was trembling, a bit. “You don’t understand. I--Obi-Wan didn’t--but I--finished--I--”

Rex swallowed, hard, second-hand agony moving through him. He reached up, slowly, and - when Cody didn’t twitch towards shooting him - gripped both of Cody’s shoulders, softly. He said, careful, “You can’t always help the things your body does. No, you can’t, not even - even without the chip. Some things just - just happen. That doesn’t mean you wanted it.” He slid one hand down, towards the blaster in Cody’s hand. “It’s not your fault.”

Cody gritted out, “That’s what Obi-Wan says.”

Rex nodded, reaching the blaster, feeling the tension in Cody’s hand. He was gripping it far too tightly for Rex to just strip it away. He said, gentling, in a way he’d only learned how to be because Ahsoka had needed it, so much, after the war, “Well, he’s right.”

Cody shook his head, sounding hoarse when he said, “He says it’s his fault.”

That was a whole other nightmare, Rex considered. Hopefully one that Ahsoka would be able to help with, because Rex had no idea how to go about addressing it. “And he’s wrong about that.”

“Commander Tano having this conversation with him?” Cody asked, as though picking up the slant of Rex’s thoughts. It felt odd, to hear him call her by her rank, after so long without them, but Rex got the feeling they were all hanging onto the scraps of structure they had left behind, trying to keep the world held together, desperately.

And so he offered no correction, only said, “She might be. But she’s not the one he needs to hear it from. He’s not going to believe her.”

Cody grimaced. Rex got an up-close look at the expression. “Rex--”

“We all know how he feels about you,” Rex interrupted, because he could see chinks in the armor, and because he thought his heart might break through his ribs if he didn’t get the blaster away from Cody sooner rather than later. He felt Cody freeze, sucking in a breath and holding it. “It never was a secret.”

“He doesn’t anymore,” Cody said, voice broken, and Rex ached for him. “He can’t. Not after what I did.”

“Ahsoka says otherwise,” Rex said, a lie, because he and Ahsoka hadn’t discussed...that. But Rex didn’t need Jedi intel to see the truth of it. He’d watched the way Kenobi looked at Cody, yearning, full of hurt and the barest glimmers of hope, all at once, when they were around one another, yesterday. He’d seen Kenobi reach towards Cody, multiple times, only to draw back.

Cody dropped his head, gritting out, “Don’t.”

Rex pressed his advantage, such as it was. “Why is that so hard for you to believe? You’re still in love with him, aren’t you?” 

Cody flinched back, away from him. “That’s not--”

Rex followed, focus split between Cody’s curved shoulders and the blaster, insisting, “Aren’t you?” Cody let out a terrible sound, not much of a reply, and Rex continued, testing each word, “Kriff, you broke your brain to help him. You killed Skywalker for him. Are you really going to let him suffer now because you want to take all the blame for something that wasn’t your fault?”

Cody looked up at him, slowly, eyes shining, face streaked with tears. Rex reached out towards the blaster. “They made us tools. They tried to kill us. They - they abused you and tortured you. You and him. But you lived. He lived. Because you had each other. You beat them, Cody, because you had him and he had you. Don’t let them win, now. Please.”

He restrained a relieved cry when Cody’s fingers loosened around the blaster. Rex stripped it from his hand, ejected the clip, threw the clip to the side, and then sagged back, breathing raggedly as he leaned against the wall, pulse pounding against his skin.

“Kriffing hell,” he said, dragging the back of his hand across his mouth, adrenaline still burning him up. He hadn’t been sure how things were going to play out, hadn’t been fully confident that Cody was going to hand over the blaster without a fight. He drew in a deep breath and reached out, curling an arm around Cody’s shoulder and pulling him in.

“You scared the fuck out of me,” he said, Cody going stiff for just a moment before he slumped. “But it’s alright,” Rex said, because he’d come back from the chip. They’d all taken the first step to coming back, and Rex could help them travel the rest of the way. He wasn’t going to lose any more of his brothers. Not if he could help it. He tipped his head against Cody’s, and said, “We’re going to get through this.”

And standing there, just for a few moments, he tried not to think about the fact that everyone else on the Recompense probably needed to hear the same thing. Well. He’d be there to tell them. As many times as they needed to hear it.

He hoped, though, that Ahsoka managed to help General Kenobi. It would probably come across better, coming from him.

“I don’t know what to do,” Cody said, voice all emptied out, shredded, and Rex wasn’t sure that he’d ever expected to hear Cody admit that. Not even at the end of the war, when they’d both been tattered and shredded by constant loss. 

Cody had always known what to do.

Rex shuddered. He said, “Well, sleeping would be a good start. When was the last time you did that?”

Cody shook his head, which wasn’t an answer, and said, “I need to go make sure Obi-Wan is alright.”

“He’s fine,” Rex said, relieved, in a way, that Cody had switched tracks back to worrying about Kenobi. It meant he was another step further away from going for a blaster. He doubted the fixation was strictly healthy, but… “Ahsoka is looking after him.” But Cody was already pulling away, expression drawn and tense, and Rex had learned to pick his battles long ago.

He followed Cody back through the halls. They weren’t, he noticed, very far at all from Kenobi’s rooms. The door was still open. A half-dozen of their brothers were lingering around, without making any pretense for their presence, just… keeping an eye on things.

Rex nodded at them as Cody stepped up to the door, peering in. 

Obi-Wan slept still, rolled onto his side, and he looked more like himself asleep, some of the lines erased from his face. Ahsoka sat on the side of the bed, her elbows on her knees and her head hanging down, turned to one side.

She looked up at their shadows in the doorway, her face streaked with tears, and Rex didn’t need to ask what she’d seen in the dreams. He could guess. “He’ll sleep for at least half a day,” she said, her voice raspy, when Cody drifted a step into the room, moving like a sleepwalker. 

“There won’t be nightmares?” Cody asked, voice quiet as well. He started to reach out, towards Obi-Wan’s shoulder, and caught himself, drawing back.

Ahsoka cleared her throat. “Shouldn’t be,” she said, scrubbing at her cheeks. She stood, curling an arm around her chest, looking smaller, all at once. Cody nodded and then, without another word, sank down to sit beside the bed, shoulders pressing against the mattress. “Oh,” she said, “you don’t have to--”

“Just in case,” he said, drawing a knee up, arm resting across it.

Ahsoka opened her mouth, and Rex reached out, curling fingers around her elbow, squeezing pointedly when she looked over at him. “Of course,” she said, after a moment, and reached her hand out, carefully, fingertips brushing across Cody’s brow.

Rex watched him frown, just for a moment, but he was most of the way to asleep already. It barely took a nudge to send him the rest of the way down, his head dropping back against the mattress, his eyes falling closed.

“Get some rest,” Rex said, quietly, tugging Ahsoka a step back. He promised Cody’s sleeping form, “We’ll look after them.”

#

Nightmares had plagued Cody for as long as he could remember. Even before the chips, he’d had ill dreams. Most of his brothers had, he knew. Dreams of battle and blood and death. Dreams where they turned on their Jedi and executed them, calm and sure and--

Cody had always had nightmares.

They’d just gotten worse, lately. He hadn’t slept much, since Mustafar. When he had, memories and twisted horrors moved through his mind. He dreamed of Obi-Wan, hunched in a corner, bloody and--

And he woke up with a jerk, in a room that felt strange, his heart threatening to rip apart in his chest. There was a hand on his shoulder, familiar, Obi-Wan saying, “--up, Cody--”

For a moment, the dream and the waking world blended all together, disjointed and confusing. In the dream, he’d been unable to control himself, but he could move his body again, abruptly, the way he wanted to, and Obi-Wan was right there, crouching beside him, radiating concern, and--

There was no thought to Cody grabbing him, his nerves all burning with alarm, with a need to make Obi-Wan safe. Cody pulled Obi-Wan closer and twisted, putting him against the bed. Cody curled his shoulders over, sure, in the confused mess left behind by the nightmares, that a blow was about to fall, ready for his own fist to come down against his back.

It didn’t land, and he blinked, after a beat, the nightmare washing out of his head. Later, he’d realize Obi-Wan probably had a hand in that, pulling it out of his mind and releasing it. It left him shivering, braced, with an arm curled around Obi-Wan, pushed close and into his space, and--

Horror made him jerk back. He’d just grabbed Obi-Wan, without so much as a by-your-leave, put hands on him again. His gut twisted, hard, bitterness flooding his mouth. He made to pull away totally, only to freeze into place when a snag of pressure made him realize that Obi-Wan had, for some reason, grabbed his shirt, fingers clenched tight, holding on.

Cody stared at his grip, for a moment. Obi-Wan’s knuckles were white against his skin. Desperate, just for a moment, before Obi-Wan released his grip, pulling his hand back and turning his face away, panting out, “I’m sorry.”

Cody’s gut twisted, terrible, and he said, “Don’t, you don’t have to--” 

“I do. I know,” Obi-Wan said, his eyes focused on the far wall. He looked… better, Cody noticed, with a lurch in his chest. There was some trace of color in his cheeks. “I know you don’t want to touch me, I know, I’m sorry, for--” he dragged in a breath, strangling himself off. 

Memories sleeted back through Cody’s head, all at once. He’d… almost put a blaster against the side of his head, hadn’t he? Would have done, and happily pulled the trigger, if Rex hadn’t found him.

He shuddered, swallowing hard, trying to focus on the present moment. He was sitting on the floor of Obi-Wan’s quarters, the door open almost directly across from him. The lights were dim and he ached in approximately a dozen places, both from old wounds and the position he’d slouched into while sleeping.

None of that seemed to matter very much with Obi-Wan saying: I know you don’t want to touch me. 

And Rex had - had said all kinds of things, only half of which Cody actually remembered clearly, the previous day had been a blur, but… “I do,” he said, fighting to force the words out, watching Obi-Wan blink towards him, control of his expression slipping. “I want to--make you safe. But I, fuck. I hurt you, Obi-Wan, I--”

“It wasn’t you,” Obi-Wan started, again, and Cody shook his head, hard, knowing he should shift back, give Obi-Wan more space, but…. But the door was open, and Cody itched, all down his spine, and he could restrain himself, but keeping his body between Obi-Wan and everything else made things easier.

He said, hoarse, “But I still remember doing it.” Obi-Wan went still. Cody felt it happen, felt him suck in a breath and hold it. “I remember hitting you. I remember what it felt like to - to force you, and I failed you,” Cody said, the past dragging at him, his voice ruined. “I hurt you. I -- couldn’t stop. I--” And he could almost see Obi-Wan gearing up to disagree, to try to take all the blame for everything onto his own shoulders, Rex’s words echoing in his ears and--

“No,” Obi-Wan said, reaching towards him again and stopping, his hand just frozen there, fingers outstretched, and Cody could read need in his expression, there and gone and buried. “Please, Cody, I should have--”

“Don’t,” Cody bit out, because he wasn’t sure he could actually bear to listen to Obi-Wan trying to blame himself for what had happened again. And he knew, bone-deep, that Obi-Wan was never going to agree that it was his fault. He’d fight, tooth and nail, over it, punishing himself for - for everything Skywalker had done. 

Cody shifted, made a choice, thinking about Rex reminding him of things he already knew, that the Jedi weren’t meant to be alone, and lifted a hand, slowly, towards Obi-Wan’s. He went slow, gave Obi-Wan plenty of time to jerk away, and Obi-Wan made a gutted, punched out sound when Cody brushed their fingers together.

Obi-Wan jerked towards him, not away, fingers clenching around Cody’s, tight, as Cody said, “It’s not your fault Skywalker tortured you. Us.”

Obi-Wan froze in the middle of opening his mouth, eyes going wide, shiny in the dark room. “It’s not,” Cody kept going, words catching at his tongue and his teeth, “your responsibility. What he did to all of us. You’re not to blame. How could you have stopped him?”

Obi-Wan blinked, flinching, as though perhaps he’d searched his own mind and fabricated some ways he could have possibly done the impossible. Cody shifted his grip, bringing his other hand up, palm pressed to the back of Obi-Wan’s hand. “It’s not,” Cody repeated, quietly, as Obi-Wan stared across at him, eyes wide and stunned, “your fault.”

Obi-Wan exhaled, shakily, his skin cool as he shifted his fingers, just a little. Cody asked, swallowing, bracing, “Is this alright?”

“Yes,” Obi-Wan said, quickly, before his expression shuttered just a little. “But you don’t have to--”

“Obi-Wan,” Cody tried to find the words to explain the ball of pressure in his chest, the knot that refused to ease, worry and tension and a driving need to make Obi-Wan alright, and-- There was no way to speak it into being, he didn’t know how. He shook his head, instead, and rasped, “I want - if you want - I need--”

And maybe something he said made sense, or maybe Obi-Wan had just always known him well enough to decipher the things he couldn’t say, because Obi-Wan shifted, tugging his hand free; Cody released his grip, worried that he’d squeezed too hard, that he’d hurt Obi-Wan.

Obi-Wan took a little breath, met his gaze, and reached his hand forward, towards Cody’s shoulder. He stopped, a breath away, and asked, “You need this?”

Cody jerked out a nod, shamed to need it, to ask, to expect Obi-Wan to excuse what he’d done, but--

But he could not help the way his shoulders curled over, when Obi-Wan touched him, radiating soothing peace towards him, emotions curling around him, and none of them hurt, it was impossible--

“Sh,” Obi-Wan said, hand sliding to his back, tugging, just a little, and Cody heard the broken noise that came out of his own throat as Obi-Wan shifted closer to him, murmuring, so soft, “Cody, it’s alright.”

Cody made a harsh sound, half-disagreement, but it was muffled because he seemed to have pressed his face against the side of Obi-Wan’s head. His hands shook as he curled an arm up, careful, around Obi-Wan’s back.

Obi-Wan exhaled, ragged, and Cody had not expected him to collapse forward, to grip tight, holding on as Cody made a nonsense sound, holding him carefully, waiting to wake up from this dream, or to have it warp into something awful and nightmarish.

Cody squeezed his eyes closed, wondering if Obi-Wan had needed this all along, if he’d failed, again, and--

And he set all those thoughts aside, for at least a while, curling his other arm around Obi-Wan, holding him there, on the floor, until it stopped feeling like a dream.