#so now my gifs don't look really weird if there's a lot of movement

[vampyfrnk]

me every day of my life.

[froggywritesstuff]

pros and cons | rise!donatello

ship/pairing: rise!Donatello x male!reader

fandom: rise of the teenage mutant ninja turtles

warnings: fluff, cuddling, mentions of a.i., not proofread

word count: 796

A/N: idk man. 18+ people DNI

There are a lot of cons to dating a mutant turtle who lives in the sewers. One, being the fact that he lives in the sewers, and you have a sense of smell. Among others was your friends constantly nagging you to introduce them to him, or to at least show them a picture of your boyfriend that they were getting more convinced everyday that he was an a.i. bot.

Although the list of cons might have looked like an extremely long list to anyone else, you focused on the pros. In your eyes, the cons were but a small hill compared to the mountain of pros. To name a few, having a really smart boyfriend meant never having to go to a phone repair shop. Considering how many times you’ve dropped your phone in the lair, this was a very big pro. And with a mutant turtle boyfriend apparently came three mutant turtle brothers that you had become fast friends with.

Being friends with them, there wasn't much difference between your friendship with them and your friendships with non-mutant people. Aside from the secrecy, the sewers, and all the weird places they'd take you and/or tell you about. You did have sleepovers though. They were always fun. It’s just less fun when you're sleeping in your super smart boyfriend's bed and he's suddenly super busy super late at night with some super smart and super loud project.

Now you could cover your ears with your pillow and count a million sheep while you will yourself to sleep, ignoring the sounds from Donnie's lab and trying to gaslight yourself into thinking it wasn't that loud. However, leaving the lonely bed to sit with and annoy him sounded much more fun. After little contemplation, you slide out of bed, trudging over toward where Donnie sat in his chair. With no explanation, you flopped into his lap, readjusting to make the both of you comfortable. Donnie paused what he was doing, pulling his goggles over his head and staring down at you.

”…Hello.”

He felt you smile into the crook of his neck, followed by the vibrations of your muffled voice, “Hi.”

”What are you doing?” He asked, idly continuing his work but still giving you his attention.

You stay quiet, answering with a simple shrug.

”Are you gonna go back to sleep?”

"That's what I'm tryna do."

"Then go back to the bed?" He suggested as if it were obvious, to which you scoffed at.

”Uh, rude.”

Donnie rolled his eyes, though he couldn’t deny the smile tugging on his lips as he talked with you, “Y/N, I doubt that my lap is a better place to sleep than the bed, in fact, I’m almost certain of it.”

A frown formed on your lips, and you shook your head, “Keyword; almost. So no, I will not be leaving. I just got comfortable. And you’re nice and cool.”

"I assume I don't have to warn you of this, but it's gonna be loud."

"I know," you said, "It's still loud when I sleep in bed." Donnie's shoulders sagged at the realisation that he had woken you up. You felt the subtle movement, and looked up at him to meet his eyes, "If you like, actually want me to, I can go."

"No," he shook his head, "You can stay."

"Are you sure? You're not just saying that?"

"I'm sure Y/N." he smiled at you.

A sigh of relief left your lips at the confirmation that your physical touch wasn't making him uncomfortable, and you let your head rest against his plastron, "Nice, I'm super tired and I don't wanna walk all the way to bed."

"I understand, that sounds so hard." Donnie drawled, a rare occurrence of him using sarcasm.

"Right? Can I sleep like this every time I sleep over? Wait, don't answer that, I've made up my mind and I wanna."

"Sigh," Donnie sighed, but you could still see the slight smile on his lips, “Get a boyfriend they said. It’ll be fun, they said.”

"I heard that." 

"Good, it was intended for you to hear." he pulled his goggles down, and handed you a pair of noise cancelling headphones. Thanking him, you placed them over your ears, yawning as you readjusted to a more comfortable position.

You fell asleep shortly after that, and woke up in bed, cuddled up to Donnie. He was still sleeping soundly, and judging by the bags under his eyes, you assumed you got a better night's sleep than him. You smiled, cuddling closer to him as you let yourself sleep some more. There was truly no better feeling than waking up next to him. The pros definitely outweigh the cons when it comes to dating Donnie.

[raven-at-the-writing-desk]

Hi, Miss Raven! What're your thoughts on the new characters' designs and the new cards we're getting?

[You can see the designs for the Halloween 2023 cards and other related TWST news here!]

I'll post my general thoughts below! I unfortunately don't know enough about Pinocchio myself to point out all the little easter eggs in their outfits, so I'll leave that to those who are more knowledgeable than me.

***Spoilers below the cut!!***

Regarding the NRC boys' looks overall, I think it's a very fun theme and very fitting for the location of the event. I like that they all still wear masks, just in a different context than in Glorious Masquerade. One thing I did notice is that the masks seem... same-y? Like they all resemble thick tree roots or something like that. So maybe they aren't masks at all, but they're associated with whatever the conflict in the story is. (I previously suggested mind control or the loss of consciousness, so maybe the "roots" play into that???) You can see the marionette theme Yana was going for, as well as some design elements from Black Butler's circus arc, very clearly. The poses for each of the boys, even the R cards, are extremely dynamic and imply a strong sense of movement. The ribbons are such a simple detail that contributes a lot to this sense of whimsy and flow.

Some comments I have on specific designs and poses:

Suspenders are so... Trey 💀 THERE'S REALLY NOTHING ELSE FOR ME TO ADD HERE, THEY JUST SUIT HIM

I like it when Trey makes these kind of slightly sus but plausibly deniable faces... He should make more of them...

I can't see the front of Jack's outfit that well, so I don't know if I can fully comment on it??? But I can see his. Like. Physique... coming through... That chest to waist ratio/j

Seeing Jack's tail like that kinda weirds me out. I think that's the first time we've gotten a "full" view of how the tails look coming out of the pants??? So maybe I'll get more used to it with time...

J WORD MY BELOVED dghgqwktvwukdviu1vdutw1513FR7vuofOTVUofvfaafvfyivs.,bk;mobsdb;ibuafetvuqoffSEythTOTqebivfguovqnafCUtuiUIEtt please ignore my bias 🤡 The way his top hat is angled and how there's a dark blue ribbon around him... It vaguely looks like he's trying to pass as Crowley, LOL

I like how his undershirt is frilled and how he has that sash at his waist it reminds me of the genderbent design for my TWST OC! The fact that both he and Floyd have the eel emblem that resembles a heart is also really cute~

Lilis is my favorite design of the R cards!! There's a very good distribution of ruffles throughout the look, and his knotted skirts fit well with his personal flair.

I'm not a huge fan of the style of hat Cater's wearing (sorry to all the Cay-kun stans out there), but I can appreciate his look. His dress appears more militant than Trey's, and his posing is certainly more aggressive--it's nice to see him in this new light.

FHIBBAILAIBASIADIHBLBUDB EVERY TIME I SEE L*ONA NOW I'M GOING TO THINK OF THE ONE REBLOG I SAW THAT SAID "of course leona has his tits out again" BECAUSE THEY'RE RIGHT, HE'S LITERALLY THE GIRLIE THAT DRESSES SLUTTY ON HALLOWEEN AND SOMEHOW NEVER GETS COLD 😭 You go, king... Live your best life!!

Love L*ona-san’s new hairstyle here!! 👀

The way Floyd is posed reminds me of those people that walk around on stilts. I think I much prefer the coloration on Floyd's outfit than on Jade's, but I prefer Floyd's jacket to Jade's. I think Floyd's the best of the SR designs!

Shockingly, Vil's look doesn't stand out to me that much??? I enjoy his sash, but I don't immediately pick up on anything in his illustration that catches my eye.

His pose resembles that of a ballerina, which just makes me think about the time he assigned Epel and Deuce extra (ballet) dance lessons in book 5 ajdbhasivldsadued

Of the SSRs, Ace is definitely my favorite one. He just looks so dramatic soaking up that spotlight and trying to look cool while doing it... Bro's 100% thinking, "heheheheh, I'm SO awesome :))" in his head.

Ace's design also reminds me a lot of Jack Hearts (from Disney Villain Recruiters). Not sure if it was intentional or not, but I'm definitely super into it!

HHNNNNNGNGHGHHGHGNGNGHHGHGHGHGHHHHH I WANNA BITE HIS HEAD OFF AND BULLY HIM SO BAD, I WANNA WIPE THAT SMIRK OF FHIS DUMB FACEe Am I seriously about to revert back to my Brat Loving era for Trappola... Maybe so...

I was pretty much expecting a SSR Ace (because he's a trickster with a brother that works in an amusement park) and Ortho (literally a robot that became a real boy), but Kalim took me by surprise. In hindsight, I guess it makes sense though...? Kalim has a similar immature vibe as the other two (plus I do remember there being this one scene in Aladdin where the Sultan was dressed like a jester that was being maneuvered on puppet strings).

It's great that Kalim gets to be a little out of his usual element and make darker, more mysterious expressions like what we see in his new illustration. I'm not sure if I entirely agree with how he's dressed (the yellow jacket is WAY too bright), but I love his his coattails (???) trail behind him in waves.

OR-KUN MY SON 😭😭😭 As is the case with all of his gears, I adore how the devs creatively adapted clothing into metal parts for Ortho! The half-caplet is easily the best part of the whole look for me (the pattern on it reminds me of stars falling down)--and because Ortho has a smaller stature, the type of hat he's wearing isn't as offputting; it actually looks very cute on him.

ANYWAY, VERY HAPPY THAT ORTHO GETS TO HAVE A HALLOWEEN SSR TO MATCH HIS BROTHER'S HALLOWEEN SSR FROM LAST YEAR... They match!!!

... Is that the fucking cricket on Ortho’s cape... and the goldfish on Kalim’s scarf… AND THE CAT ON ACE’S WAIST… What does this meeeean 🤡

And now for my thoughts on the two new boys!! Honestly?? I don't actually have much to comment on in this regard because I try to reserve my judgment of characters until I've actually seen them in action. I haven't seen Pinocchio either, so I don't have a strong basis for what their personalities would be like based on their original Disney counterpart. I only vaguely understand that Honest John and Gideon trick children into visiting Pleasure Island... That's it, that's the full extent of my knowledge on that pair. I don't have any other expectations going in other than "yeah, these two are going to swindle me".

Gidel looks like a mix of Cheka and Ruggie to me (because of the hair and the eye shape). He seems like he’ll be the other guy’s goon, similar to how Jade and Floyd/Ruggie follow Azul/Leona. Nothing else for me to add, Gidel seems alright… Just a silly lil’ guy!

I have more… mixed thoughts on Ferro. One one hand, he looks like the exact kind of shady bitch I’d love. (You know, the ones that smile and lie and manipulate and drive a knife into your back and—LOOK, HE’S VERY J WORD CORE) On the other hand, I’m beating back the “you like cat/dog boys” allegations from my friends, so 💀 I can’t give in so easily/j

Looks-wise, Ferro’s iteration of the rat tail hair is not as ugly to me as Malleus’s is. (I think it’s because it looks more windswept!) I also really like how he dresses—very dapper 😌 and he can pull off green eyeshadow well!

I’m wondering how they’ll make Ferro different than the other con artists we’ve seen so far *eyes Octavinelle* but I’m keeping my hopes up since the devs did a good job remixing the “I have a dead brother and I feel immense guilt about it” backstory for Rollo (when Idia had a similar one). Looking forward to that~

I’m sure my thoughts will chance once I actually get to see them in the event! ^^ I’ll keep you posted. For now, I’ll keep cautious. (Actually, this fan art basically summarizes my current feelings on the two! I’m Rollo/j)

[moonswolfie]

Hihi this is my first time requesting this but can you do 1. for your event kenma and hinata please thank youu!! (⁠◕⁠ᴗ⁠◕⁠✿⁠) (gn!reader and please take your time since this request is..quite early hehe)

Kenma x gn!reader, Hinata x gn!reader (seperately)

prompt: Opposites attract

OHOHOOO i had something like that in mind for both of these boys already outside of the event but this makes things easier!!

these are a little shorter and already have an established relationship in hinata's so I hope that's fine by you!!

ʚɞ ⁺˖ ⸝⸝Hinata Shoyo

"Mmm." you hummed in response to the wild story that Hinata was explaining to you. At first, Hinata was a bit bothered by your little hums and short responses, but now he knew that you were always listening and did care about what he was telling you.

He never expected to fall for someone like you, but life is full of surprises. People are often surprised when they find out that you're dating, too.

He's the one doing most of the talking, as per usual. If you had to pick one thing you would listen to for the rest of your life, it would be Hinata's voice. Even though you seem straight-faced and cold at first, you deeply care for the people you love and are completely enamoured by Hinata.

Despite wanting to stay in your room and read that one faithful evening, your friends dragged you to one of Karasuno's matches. You really felt moved by Hinata's movements and abilities, there was certainly something special about him. Atleast to you.

You felt the need to congratulate him on his performance in the match the next day. It took quite a bit of convincing from your friends to do it, but the way his face lit up was worth it.

And things just kind of... progressed from there.

You really clicked with Hinata, despite your opposing natures. Maybe it was just his natural charm that you can't get enough of. Or his squishable cheeks.

"Are you okay? You've been staring at me with a weird face for like... 3 minutes now?" Hinata tilted his head.

"Mm." you nodded slightly, subconsciously smiling without even noticing. Normally you would feel a bit embarrased after being caught spacing out, but you feel so natural and calm around him that it just doesn't happen.

"Oh my god, you just smiled!!" Hinata really regretted not having his phone on hand to snap a pic of you at that moment. Your smile was a really rare, but very very welcome occurence.

"Ah..." your cheeks flushed slightly and you looked away. Hinata tends to affect you like that a lot.

ʚɞ ⁺˖ ⸝⸝Kozume Kenma

He watched you pass him by with your group of friends. You were smiling brightly and chatting away as usual.

He doesn't know why or how it happens, but he always finds himself staring at you for way longer than he should be. There's just something that's so... entrancing about your smile, your face, the way you carry yourself.

You're a social butterfly, through and through, wearing bright, colorful clothes and accesories without a care in the world.

It bothered him that he's falling for you out of all people. How would he even approach you with people constantly around you, anyways?

It was almost like you were friends with everyone in the school. Probably even Kuroo.

"Yo, Kenma. What are you looking at?" He flinched when he felt his shoulder being poked, quickly taking his eyes off you to find Kuroo smirking at him.

"...Nothing." he quickly took out his PSP, hoping Kuroo didn't notice he was staring at you specifically.

"Hmmm, they are dressed quite brightly for being "nothing". Does the school even allow such a colorful vest?" Kuroo knew he busted Kenma when he flinched slightly once more.

Oh no, this is the worst case scenario. "Don't tell anyone..." he murmured.

"Don't tell anyone what? That you like their clothes? Or...." Kuroo's smirk widened, humming in feigned innocence.

Oh, curse having a childhood friend who can tell the little things about you. "Yeah, yeah, I have a crush, so what..." Kenma furrowed his brows, glancing at you one last time.

"Well well well... nah, I'm actually really happy for you."

currently obsessed with catallena by orange caramel🥰

[mochiimadness]

Hey, I dunno if your still taking requests but I have one!

What about s/o having hair like Entrapta's from She-Ra? I would love to see how they would react to their s/o with that!

Hello, I'm sorry for the long wait! I'm finally getting around to answering old requests, before opening new ones.

I haven't seen She-Ra, but I did look Entrapta up, so I hope I haven't gotten anything wrong!

Neon Leon

Leo is both insanely fascinated over your hair-

But also, very very terrified at first.

Remember when Leo wore that blond wig that ended up being completely and utterly evil??

Leo does.

Leo has flashbacks of this when he first sees you using your hair to grab a mug off the counter that was just out of hands reach.

May or may not have screamed.

"S/o, I don't mean to freak you out but- YOUR HAIR IS CURSED!"

"What- wait no it's just-"

"Don't worry- I got this!" he says, as he whips out his sword

Cue panicked screaming from everyone in the room as Leo attempts to 'save' you

He really thought you were in danger okay-

After managing to convince Leo to not chop off your hair,

You have to explain to him that your hair isn't actually cursed by some weird dude looking to steal stuff

"I was born like this, I can just make my hair move and stuff."

Cue Leo's suspicious squinting.

He does believe you! He just cant help peaking around corners detective style to spy on your hair at first.

Once he gets use to it tho, he's got to admit, having hair you can use to grab things jussst barely out of reach is amazing!

His jaw drops when he realizes you can fight using your hair too-

Your hair wraps around a rather slippery warthog mutant and launches him several feet away

Leo is staring in shock and possible fear

They'd been trying to get a hold on that mutant for ages, and you just managed to grab him no problem???

And launch him like a soft ball???????

Mad respect

Enchanted/cursed hair or not, Leo's just glad it's not using you for evil!

Plus, you seem to be having fun, so he's cool with it now.

Don Tron

Donnie's insanely curious about your hair

Absolutely runs some tests and experiments (with your permission ofc)

He's seen you lift mugs and smaller objects-

But what's the weight limit???

Is it like a muscle that can be trained to lift more over time????

Is it possibly sentient?!

You let him come up with new theories

But as soon as the conspiracy board and red strings come out,

You're lifting him with your hair and carrying him away for a break.

He loves when you help him out in the lab

Using your hair to grab and hold tools or parts

It's similar to using his spider arms, but 10x better since it's his s/o helping him.

Your hair also inspires him to make a different version of his spider arm battle shell-

This one using a more fluid movement to match your hair!

He lowkey looks like Doc Oc...

Villains do their best to avoid you both

Having one person who can grab and yeet them away was bad enough-

But now there's two??????

They are sprinting as fast as they can

Not fast enough though!

You're able to use your hair to grab and swing from walls, catching up to villains with ease

Donnie's impressed, you didn't even need a tracking device!

You two also found out another trick you could do,

You're able to use your hair as a extra set of arms- so you both came to a realization

You could use your hair to hold more controllers.

You two need an extra player???

Bam, you're holding two more controllers

Donnie cackles manically every time you two score extra points using this method

Is it technically cheating????

Maybe

You can't deny it takes a lot of skill and practice to do though, so who cares?

Not you and Donnie, that's who!

Mystic Mike

:0 !!!

Your hair can move?!?!

Please please show him what you can do!

Absolutely loves seeing all your tricks

From lifting a mug, to scaling a building-

He thinks you and your hair are awesome!!

One day, he's literally in the middle of talking to you when he interrupts his own sentence in a huge realization-

"So then I chased them down on the shells hogs and- WAIT WAIT HOLD THE PHONE-"

"Holding."

"NOW ANSWER IT!"

"Hellooo?"

"You can use your hair to paint!!!!"

Cue both of you jumping up and sprinting to his room

You can, in fact, use your hair to paint!

Whether it be using your actual hair as a paintbrush,

Or holding multiple brushes and items at once!

It makes art time ten times more efficient- but also extremely chaotic

Sure, now you both have easy access to art materials, but now your hair can literally spin everything

The guys entered the living room one day and saw it absolutely covered in buckets of paint

You are now banned from holding stain causing items in the common areas and Donnie's lab.

When you two go fight together

Mikey quickly learns that you can use your hair to help climb and scale buildings

Which leads to you crawling upside down on a ceiling at full speed, with Mikey floating beside you, at enemies

There are high pitched shrieks whenever you join the battle

You may or may not be a local cryptid now.

"S/O, they're calling you a spider mutant!"

"Nice."

Big Red

Like Leo,

Raph also thinks your hair is alive

Though, he's more concerned than fearful

If your hair is alive, then should he ask it if he can pat your head??

You reassure him that your hair is not alive or sentient

He's still wary about it though

Definitely gives it suspicious looks when you're not looking just to test it

When you catch onto this though, you start moving your hair 'without your knowledge' just to play around

Raph shrieks

"I KNEW IT!!!"

You'll have to explain that you were just pranking him lmao

He does realize that your hair isn't alive eventually though.

Is genuinely impressed by what your hair can do

Especially when he realizes you can lift heavier objects too

If you're able to lift him with your hair, he'll scream

Definitely has a fanboy moment

"WHAT!? How is it so strong?!?"

Even if you can't lift him with your hair,

He's still impressed!

Throughout the day, you'll use your hair to grab things that are out of reach and hand it to him

Usually it's subconscious,

Like when he just barely got into a comfy spot after a long patrol and realizes his phone is just out of reach

You grab it and hand it to him offhandedly

Or when he's sleeping and the blanket slips off, you'll reach around to pull it back up and make sure he's covered

He appreciates these little gestures so much

Absolutely warms his heart and makes him a little misty eyed.

During battle,

He sees you literally form a fist shape with your hair and deck a rather aggressive yokai right in the face,

Sending them flying down the street

Raph will stop and stare in awe

"Woah!! S/O that's amazing!"

He's so proud of you

Then he realizes the hidden city police are making their way towards the two of you

Cue both of you hauling it towards the nearest portal

"GO GO GO!"

"I CAN'T GO BACK TO JAIL!"

Hey everyone, I'm going through my old requests and writing them. I can't promise I'll get to all of them, but I'll do my best when I have time!

Sorry for the huge wait, life got crazy

[sundeathh]

hi!! i really love your writing style so much omgg, could i request something where reader (who is aizawa’s s/o) is being mind controlled maybe by a villains quirk idk it’s up to you HAHHAHA and they’re basically just forced to fight aizawa? the ending is up to you!

i’m so sorry if this sounds weird or doesn’t make sense at all 😭😭

Hahah, your request is not weird at all, I actually loved it a lot! Sorry for the looong delay, my schedule have been full lately and I am crazy about perfection. So, I hope you enjoy it!

.

A heartbreaking fight

One-shot | Request | Masterlist

Pairing: Aizawa × GN!Reader | Words: +2,5k

Fandom: BNHA | MHA | CW: Violence, blood mention, cursing.

Aizawa stumbled backward, the first rays of dawn casting an ethereal glow on the scene he had before him. He felt the ache deep in his bones, his body weary from hours of tireless patrol. The moon, a pale sentinel in the sky, hung overhead, a silent witness to the battle that had just unfolded.

His breath came in ragged gasps, mingling with the cool morning air. Blood trickled down his nose, staining his trusty scarf. With a weary swipe of the back of his hand, he wiped it away, his gaze never wavering from the figure before him.

The figure moved with an unnatural grace, the darkness of the night still lingering around them. Aizawa squinted, trying to make out their features in the dim light. Shadows danced around them, casting an eerie aura as if the night was reluctant to release its hold.

Despite the exhaustion seeping through his bones, Aizawa remained resolute. His eyes narrowed, determined and focused, as he squared his shoulders. The first rays of dawn illuminated his face, emphasizing the determination etched into his features. He then knew he had to end this, not just for his safety but for the person who stood before him.

As the light of dawn revealed their features, Aizawa's heart clenched with fear and anguish. It was none other than the one they had both shared laughter, tears, and countless moments of happiness with. But now, their eyes were empty, devoid of recognition or warmth. Now controlled by a villain's quirk, reduced to a mere puppet in their hands.

Aizawa's mind raced, desperately searching for a way to end this nightmare without causing any harm to the person he cherished. Every fiber of his being fought against the reality before him, where they were turned against each other. His opponent, a petty villain reveling in their newfound power, knew precisely what they were doing. They understood the psychological torment it inflicted on Aizawa and the one he held dear.

With sadistic glee, the villain taunted him, their voice echoing through the dawn-lit silence. "Get up, Eraserhead," they sneered, their words a cruel distortion of his loved one's voice. The villain's hold over them was a sickening reminder of the danger they both faced.

Aizawa struggled to his feet, his body protesting every movement. He could feel the weight of his injuries, but it was nothing compared to the weight in his heart. He couldn't bring himself to fight back against the person he held dear, even under the villain's control.

He gazed at the marionette-like figure drawing closer, their hand poised to strike. Aizawa's voice trembled with desperation as he pleaded, "Please, stop. Don't do this. Remember who you are. Remember us."

His words hung in the air, filled with love and pain. Aizawa fought to suppress the instinct to flinch away, to protect himself from the inevitable blow. He clung to the hope that his words would reach their true self, buried beneath the villain's influence.

And they did. You stopped inches from his cheek, your fingers hovering over the skin. Your hand was shaking, but whether it was because of your fear or rage, Aizawa could not tell for sure. He had never seen you so angry before. You were never this angry with him before. 

But well, you were not entirely you now.

Aizawa felt a pang of anguish as he looked into your eyes, witnessing the turmoil within. He could see fragments of your true self flickering behind the veil of the villain's control. Desperation welled up inside him, urging him to break through that barrier and reach you.

Tears welled in your eyes, mingling with the confusion and anger stamped across your face. "Are you okay?" you asked, your voice laced with hesitance and concern as your gaze fell upon his bruised face. Aizawa's heart ached at the sound of your voice, now tinged with the lingering remnants of the villain's influence.

"I'll be fine," he managed to say with a half smile, his voice thick with emotion. "But right now, I need you to hold on. Fight this, even if it feels impossible." He stated.

As the villain's grip over you weakened, their frustration and desperation grew evident. So, they tried to manipulate your body again, urging you to attack, but Aizawa intercepted your movement with swift precision. He caught your fist in his hand, exerting just enough pressure to remind you of his presence without causing you harm.

Now in the grip of his capture weapon, you struggled against the restraints, your face contorting with anger. But through the fury, Aizawa saw glimpses of vulnerability, of the person he loved fighting to break free from the shackles of control.

"Stay still. Please," Aizawa pleaded, his voice laced with desperation and tenderness. His gaze bore into your eyes, willing you to hear his words. "I can't bear to see you hurt, not like this. There's still a part of you that cares, that doesn't want to cause harm. Hold onto that, okay?"

A tear slipped down your cheek, mirroring the heartache that Aizawa felt. The sight of your pain only fueled his determination to save you, to help you reclaim your true self from the clutches of the villain's quirk.

"Why would I?" you responded with anger and bitterness evident in your voice. "I don't care about this fucking body." The words cut through the air, tinged with defiance. But beneath the surface, Aizawa could sense the war waging within you, the struggle between your true self and the puppet strings pulling you in different directions.

Aizawa's grip tightened around you, his hands trembling with fear and determination. He couldn't bear the thought of you hating him for what he was about to do, but he knew deep down that it was the only way to protect you from further harm.

"Please don't hate me..." he whispered, his voice raw and filled with anguish. Every fiber of his being screamed against his actions, but he couldn't let his emotions cloud his judgment. Your safety was paramount.

The sight of your bloodied hands, both with his blood and yours, served well as a painful reminder of the violence that had consumed the moment. Aizawa's heart sank. His gaze was fixated on the glassy and unfocused look in your eyes. It was a haunting sight, a terrible contrast to the vibrant spirit he had come to know and love.

The realization that you had lost control – that the person who owned your mind had taken away your autonomy; sent shivers down Aizawa's spine. It terrified him to his core. He couldn't let this continue. He couldn't stand idly by, watching you suffer.

So in that agonizing moment, time seemed to slow down for him. His mind raced with desperate calculations, seeking a solution to free his lover from the clutches of the villain's control. Every fiber of his being rebelled against the notion of causing you harm, but he knew it was a necessary sacrifice to protect you.

He made a split-second choice, his movements swift and determined. With a sudden surge of strength, Aizawa lunged forward, his forehead connecting with yours with a resounding thud; the impact reverberated through his skull, a painful collision of wills. His muscles strained as he willed for that impact to be enough, hoping it would send you to unconsciousness.

As you slumped forward, falling against Aizawa's chest, he held you gently, his hands cradling your body. The alleyway fell into an eerie stillness, broken only by your labored breathing. Aizawa couldn't tear his gaze away from your face, his heart pounding painfully in his chest.

The conflicting emotions within him threatened to consume him entirely. He felt a wave of nausea wash over him, his body trembling with the aftershocks of the adrenaline that had fueled his actions. He found himself questioning his own sanity, wondering how he could ever reconcile the love he held for you with the pain he had just inflicted.

Silent tears traced down his cheeks, blending with the sweat and blood staining his face. He held onto you tightly, vowing to protect you at all costs, even if it meant sacrificing his sanity in the process;

After a few seconds, Aizawa rose slowly, his head pounding and his body aching from the previous ordeal. Determination burned in his eyes as he scanned the area, searching for any sign of the villain. His voice reverberated with anger and defiance as he challenged the unseen foe.

"Show yourself, you coward!" He bellowed into the silence, his voice echoing through the alleyway. "Come out and face me! Or are you too scared to confront me directly?"

The air grew heavy with anticipation, the silence hanging thick in the atmosphere. Aizawa's heart pounded painfully in his chest as he awaited a response, but none came. Instead, he heard the unmistakable sound of footsteps drawing nearer, each step like a ticking time bomb, intensifying the tension in the air.

Aizawa took a few – cautious steps back, his body instinctively preparing for the imminent clash. His arms felt heavy, drained from the previous struggles, but he refused to let fatigue slow him down. The villain was probably exploiting his weakened state, and Aizawa couldn't afford to falter.

As the footsteps approached, Aizawa's muscles grew tense. The sound was eerily light and deliberate as if the villain was using his body for stealth. Aizawa had learned early on that this adversary was highly trained, and he couldn't afford to be caught off guard. He knew all too well the consequences of underestimating an opponent.

Finally, the villain emerged from the shadows, a malicious smile stretching across their face. Aizawa's gaze narrowed, his body coiled like a tightly wound spring. He met the villain's gaze with unwavering determination, refusing to show any signs of fear.

"So, Eraserhead," the man taunted, his voice dripping with sadistic delight, "what do you say we settle this little issue of ours once and for all?"

Aizawa's lips pressed into a thin line, his silence speaking in volumes. He didn't know the true intentions of this confrontation, but he knew one thing with absolute certainty – if there was any chance for this conflict to end without further bloodshed, it rested in the defeat of this villain.

His eyes flickered briefly towards your unconscious form lying on the ground, a surge of protectiveness flooding his veins. The villain's callous words only fueled Aizawa's determination, igniting an inferno within him. This fight wasn't just about his survival; it was about protecting you.

Meanwhile, the villain eyed his unconscious significant other lying on the ground. "Can't believe you knocked them out so mercilessly…" the villain chuckled, "you should thank your partner for sparing your life. I'll give you some credit, Eraser." 

Aizawa locked eyes with the villain, his gaze unwavering. "You have no idea what mercy is," he hissed through gritted teeth, his voice laced with a potent mix of anger and resolve. "But mark my words: I'll make sure this ends here."

Aizawa's grip on his capture weapon tightened, his knuckles turning white. The villain's words echoed in his mind, fueling the fire of determination that burned within him. He refused to let this adversary's twisted perception of mercy go unchallenged.

The tight street seemed to shrink as the tension reached its peak. Aizawa took a step forward, his movements deliberate and measured. His eyes never wavered from the villain's gaze, the intensity of his focus a testament to his unwavering resolve.

"You think you understand mercy?" Aizawa's voice carried an icy edge, cutting through the dawn air like a blade. "You have no concept of what it means to spare a life. I won't let you taint their memory with your sick version of salvation." Every word dripped with venom, a stark contrast to the calm demeanor Aizawa typically displayed. 

But this was personal now – personal for him and you. The concept of the villain's grip on your mind and your body was unbearable. He would put an end to it, no matter the cost.

Aizawa's muscles tensed further, ready to spring into action. He knew he had to outsmart the villain, turn the tables and reclaim control of the situation. He couldn't afford to hold back any longer.

With a sudden surge of determination, Aizawa lunged forward, his movements swift and precise. He unleashed a barrage of attacks, utilizing his capture weapon with expert precision. The distinct sound of fabric tearing echoed through the buildings, punctuated by the villain's grunts of pain.

But the villain was cunning, adept at evading Aizawa's strikes. They retaliated with calculated moves, each blow aimed to exploit Aizawa's exhaustion and weakened state. It was now a battle of wills, a fight for dominance.

Aizawa refused to let despair creep in. He drew upon his training, his instincts honed through years of experience. He analyzed the villain's patterns, anticipating their every move: each strike became more precise, more determined, as he pressed forward, inch by inch.

As the fight raged on, time seemed to distort. Seconds felt like an eternity. The combat was like a symphony of raw power and unyielding determination. Aizawa's heart pounded in his chest – each beat a reminder of the stakes at hand.

As the battle reached its crescendo, Aizawa's resolve hardened. He channeled every ounce of his being into one final, decisive move. With a resounding thud, the villain crumpled to the pavement: defeated.

Aizawa stood over their fallen form, his chest heaving with exertion. The dawn fell into a heavy silence, broken only by his ragged breaths. He glanced at your unconscious figure, relief flooding his weary soul.

"It ends here," Aizawa whispered – his voice a mixture of exhaustion and triumph. Then, he knelt beside you, his eyes filled with relief and tenderness.

Gently, he cradled your head in his hands, his touch conveying both strength and vulnerability. "No one will ever control you again," Aizawa murmured, his voice filled with unwavering determination. His fingers brushed against your cheek, tracing a soothing path. "I promise."

Those words hung in the air, carrying a weight of sincerity that resonated deep within your unconscious mind. Aizawa's gaze lingered on your peaceful face, his heart aching with the memory of the battle and also; the love he held for you.

With care, the hero scooped you into his arms, holding you close against his chest. He rose slowly, his movements cautious, as if carrying something infinitely precious. His scarf draped around you, offering warmth and protection, as he started to make his way out of the alleyway.

Every step he took was deliberate, focused solely on ensuring your safety. Aizawa's determination radiated from him, his grip on you tightening slightly as if to shield you from any remaining threats.

Silently, Aizawa traversed the moonlit streets, his eyes scanning for any signs of danger as the cold air of the dawn ruffled his dark hair. The weight of the battle still lingered on him, but in his arms, he carried hope and the unwavering promise to keep you out of harm's way.

As he stepped into the main road, Aizawa's gaze flickered skyward. Stars shimmered above, a reminder of the world beyond their current turmoil. He held onto the promise he made to you, the promise to guard you against the shadows that threatened to consume you.

"I'll keep you safe," He whispered, his voice carrying the weight of his unwavering devotion. "No matter what."

Likes, reblogs and comments are appreciated! Check the fixed post for requests.

[bigfan-fanfic]

Sorry for Kicking Your Ass (Male!Reader x Dean Winchester)

Requested by anonymous for  Can you do a fic where Dean met a magic user he used to hunt, but failed to, years later when he stopped hunting. He felt a crush on him and now he knows those weird feelings he used to thought as aggression was actually attraction now that he’s a bit comfortable with his sexuality?

"Well, well, well. Dean Winchester, in the flesh." You smirk, sliding into the booth across from the man in question.

Dean looks a little strangled - which makes sense, as your magic is already holding him in place, preventing him from moving anything but his eyes and mouth.

"Didn't I tell you what would happen if I caught you back in my town, Winchester?" you snarl.

"To be fair to me, didn't mean to get caught. Kind of a gas and food up stop."

You frown. "You're not hunting?"

He tries to shrug but can't. "Uh... no. Baby's only got the essentials for self-defense."

You tilt your head. "Why?" Hunters don't quit. They die on the job.

"Well, maybe I didn't wanna die. Again. Maybe I just wanted a fucking apple pie life, okay?"

You let the spell down. "What about your asshole dad?"

"Died. Couple of times." Dean shrugs, looking mournfully at the pie slice his sudden freedom of movement sent crashing to the floor.

"Oh. Condolences."

He shrugs.

"What about your little brother? Sammy. Last I saw him, he was in high school?"

"He got a full ride to college. Dropped out to find our dad with me. We hunted for a few years, and then I decided I'd had enough of dying and getting brought back, and we quit. I think Sam reconnected with an old girlfriend up in New York. Working in an art gallery."

"And you?"

"Been, uh... figuring myself out. Making amends. I hurt a lot of people I shouldn't have while hunting. People who weren't really monsters. So... I kinda lied earlier. I am here to see you."

"Me? Uh... I kinda beat your ass last time we met, Winchester."

He nods. "But, uh... before then."

You think back.

You had been home on winter break from college when you saw the fake FBI Agents (John and Dean). To be fair, you had killed a dirty cop that was blackmailing high school girls, but still.

John had figured due to your sloppiness that you were inexperienced and left to go on a hunt a state over.

So that left Dean looking for you.

He met you while walking through town, and didn't know you were the witch. You made quick friends and Dean gave you the vibes.

You invited him home, but when you tried to kiss him, he freaked out.

It didn't quite surprise you, but it still hurt to see him looking at you in disgust and anger.

He had left, and the next week he was in your house again, trying to kill you. Which was kinda the worst reaction you had ever had to an attempted kiss.

"Look, I was a shit back then. I freaked out on you. Normally, seeing what that prick did, I'd have left you alone, but... I thought you had put a spell on me. I didn't understand what I was feeling."

You freeze. "Uh... are you coming out to me, Dean?"

"Yeah, guess I am." He smirks, pulling aside his jacket so you can see the little bi flag pin he has hidden, pinned on the inside, over the heart.

You chuckle a little there.

"I won't say you were my first guy crush. That honor belongs to Robert Plant." Dean jokes. "But definitely the first crush I actually knew in real life that I knew was a crush."

You start to laugh. "So, what now, Dean? You wanna start all the way over?"

Dean shrugs. "If you like. If you want, I'd like to at least redo that kiss you wanted to give me."

You giggle. "Okay. We'll see. Take me out to dinner first, and we'll see how it goes."

"Deal."

[otakween]

Digimon Frontier - Episode 3

For this episode I decided to check out the English dub for Frontier. I really enjoyed it! My problem is that the Digimon dubs are more fun and nostalgic to watch, but I'm always really conscious of missing out on lore and emotional beats. Maybe I'll finish the sub and then watch the dub someday when I wanna revisit this.

Notes:

The American OP is hype as heck! I like the tribal vibe with the drums. I think I like the Japanese digivolution music a little better though.

I liked most of the English VAs but Takuya sounds like a 30 year old lol. For some reason, Izumi's Italian outbursts were a lot funnier in English, "Mamma mia!"

I coulda sworn Takuya said he was in the 4th grade in the last episode but now he's in the 5th? In the dub he's in the 6th, so let's just say he's somewhere in the upper elementary range.

I really loved Tomoki's digivolution sequence. I like how his hand movements are a little more childish/cheerful than Takuya or Koji's Also, in the dub I love how he said "EXECUTE" lol. I know they meant like "executing a program" but I was just thinking of the murder version of "execute" hehe.

So I guess Bokomon and Neemon have a boke/tsukkomi dynamic going on. I think they overdid Bokomon's bullying a bit tho

Lol @ the DigiCode fixing one (1) single bridge in this episode whereas in the first episode they fixed like an entire village. I guess some digimon get you better results than others? (Also they said that the bridge "protected them from bad digimon," how does that work?)

So they've established a bunch of times now that there are supposed to be 10 warriors. Betting the cast will expand with some minor characters later.

I just noticed this, but Takuya has a little symbol on his shirt and hat but I'm not sure if it's supposed to be a reference to something or it's just a cool graphic.

Speaking of graphics, I finally noticed that the symbols for the spirits are literally just kanji. Like Agnimon's is the kanji for fire, Wolfmon is light, Chackmon is ice...

Uhhh...why is the dub name for Chackmon (Kumamon) way more Japanese sounding? I guess they couldn't have used Kumamon in the sub cuz...

Chackmon is a weird name and even after reading the etymology on the wiki I don't really get it.

These kids are kinda savage. First Bokomon is pleading with them to save his world and they just look annoyed and then when Agnimon is battling all the Candlemon they're just like "wow, he's really trying to fight a fire type? What a dumbass" (paraphrasing) and they walk off (to be fair, Takuya told them to hide, but still!) It was really funny when Bokomon was telling the Candlemon that the kids were there to save the Digital World and Takuya was like "not really" lol.

I'm glad that they were at least given the chance to go home because otherwise it feels a little bit like they're being blackmailed into being heroes (save our world or you'll never see your home again)

I'm sure someone has meme'd on Agnimon being covered in white drippy wax before...I'll refrain.

I feel like we already have too much lore here. First it was Cherubimon was messing up the world and now it's actually Lucemon that was the OG world messer-upper? Now I dunno who the big bad is!

If there are 10 warriors...I wonder what the elements are gonna be. Well I guess Pokemon has managed to come up with a zillion "elements." Is someone gonna end up with "heart?" hahaha

Didn't expect Wizardmon to show up as a baddie-of-the-week. Feels weird.

I kinda like that Koji is taking his sweet time to join the party. We don't need his drama in the friend group.

[defodisturbed]

Diet Culture - Poly!Recoms x PlusSize!reader

(A/N: inspired by the song Diet Culture by Brye! i love the song and can relate to it as a mid/plus-size person. i wrote this for my friend (you know who you are) and thought she would like it! i've always felt insecure and i'm sure many of you have as well. i hope this can bring you some joy or comfort even in the slightest. enjoy!)

And I know their worst fear is to look like me

And that fact makes me want to kill somebody.

To be a plus-sized person in the modern age has never been an easy feat. At least in the 16-18th century they thought it was very beautiful and desirable to have a body like mine. But now, as resources run dry and there's no space for everyone due to overpopulation, everyone hates fat people more than ever before. The body positivity movement was popular and utilized in the 21st century, but thats far, far behind us now. I feel crippling anxiety and shame every day for having to do the simplest things. Riding the train, feeling tired, and hell, even eating. My last thought before dying was that maybe in the next life I could be thinner.

Here I am now, staring at myself in the mirror. My skin is blue, I have stripes, and Lord, what a fatass I feel like. Why couldn't Parker or whoever's in charge of Project Phoenix just let me live in peace for once? My teammates are standing behind me as I examine my new teeth, tail, and my new skin. How big of a hospital gown did they have to make for me? I should apologize for this. I should apologize for having been brought back. Nobody wants a fat girl on their team. Nobody likes a fat girl. Nobody cares about fat girls. My thoughts run rampant through my head as I start to zone out.

"Hey, Y/N, you good? I know it's a little weird at first..." Lyle asks. I snap out of it and start to walk towards the door. I ask for someone to take me to my room, and so they escort me to my new place. It's very nice. They give me a lot of clothes and tell me to get comfortable because I'll be here awhile.

I get changed and explore my room. It's well lit, and when the lights are off, you can barely see anything. That's good for sleep. The bed is soft and it is comfortable.

When I get settled, the first number I call is my best friend. I tell her about how I just got resurrected and she asks how I feel.

"Fucking horrible. My body is still as fat if not fatter than it was before, my hair is messy, my skin is blue now, I have a weird tail and sharp teeth, and I just want to die again. I would like to die over and over again until they bring me back in at least a smaller body."

My friend tries to comfort me but her advice just doesn't do the trick this time. I tell her I gotta unpack and get situated. We say goodbye and I hang up.

Fuck, why did they have to do this to me?

---

I hear a knock at the door. I roll my eyes, making a game out of guessing who wants to talk to me now. I open the door, seeing my old friend, Alicia Zdinarsk. I invite her in and she offers to help me unpack. I accept her offer, and as we unpack, she tells me how weird it was for her to wake up blue as well. I wanted to shout IT'S NOT THE BLUE! IT'S NOT THE TAIL, NOT THE TEETH, NOTHING LIKE THAT! but I held back. I can't argue without crying anyway.

"Hey, you okay? You kind of zoned out in the wakeup room." Z says. I reply, "Yeah, it's just I really wish they revived me in a smaller body. I don't know how they expect a fat girl to-"

"No. You're not gonna call yourself fat as an insult. You're so awesome, and I cannot imagine being here again without you. Sure, people on Earth might've hated fat people, but we're not on Earth anymore. And last time I checked, we all love you just as you are. You don't need to change anything about you. We love you more than you could ever imagine, okay?" Z said. I was stunned. "Okay." I replied. I was always amazed by their collective love for me, but I never thought it was as deep as this. Nobody has ever told me they love me in the way Z just did, let alone a whole team of soldiers.

"Hello?? Y/N, Z??? You in there??? Mansk is making cocktails for us and I want us all to be there when we get drunk and grind-y tonight!" Lyle yelled through the door, banging on it as he did so. "Lyle, we're gonna head over in a second! For right now, keep it in your pants!" Z yelled back. I chuckled as we finished the last box of stuff. I could hear Lyle make a noise of disappointment outside, not wanting to wait any longer. I rolled my eyes and looked into Z's deeply, before pulling her in for a little kiss. She returned it, and we hugged until Lyle came banging on the door again.

"Can we at least watch a movie in the meantime??"

MWAH hope yall enjoyed!! @dyingofcookies thought you would like this :3 💋💋

[applesontheground]

no returns 🎠

and last but not least for my protagonist triad, our beautiful angel...angel :') i felt seen by him as someone who also hates her retail job, talks aliens with acquaintances, and was having a really fucking weird summer in 2022. since it's been a sec (and if you're curious/had bisexual panic during this movie when not faced with the Horrors), you can find my OJ and Em blurbs here!

and listen. if i knew how to tackle cosmic romance with jean jacket along with these guys i would've done it. get back to me on that. or don't. i have a lot of wips already.

SFW | Word Count: 795 | Angel Torres x GN Reader 🎼: x

“Hey, not here to bust your balls or whatever, but I just wanted to ask about a good pair of wireless headphones.”

You couldn’t help the casual tone when seeing someone your age behind the counter, because he looked like the type that could take it without a hitch. Still, he almost looked startled, fumbling a suspiciously smartphone-shaped bundle under the counter before you got too close. He hadn’t even seemed to have heard you, finding his customer service voice before anything else.

“Sure-“ He waltzed out from behind a swinging door that kept him closed off to the public, which you imagined was pleasant during busy hours.  He put a hand on his hip and asked as the two of you started walking towards the correct section, you mostly following where he was leading, “Were you looking for wired or wireless?”

Silent, a smile grew on your face as his brain caught up with his mouth. He almost jumped at his own realization: “Right, wireless…”

You nodded along, and he slipped over to the even more precise section of the aisle you had been walking towards. He put a hand up to where the headphones would be, pursing his lips in a stiff expression. Everything about him screamed uncomfortable, so you returned the neutered movement with your own affirming wave, a signal that he didn’t have to linger.

Your eyes kept scanning over the colors, the prices… the packaging, even. You weren't too sure what would work. Earbuds were something you kept for a good three or four years then lost tragically to some freak accident.

Maybe you merely washed them with your jeans one too many times, but no one needed to know the details.

He was almost erratic, perfectly fine to leave but seeming as though his soles had been screwed into the floor. His eyes couldn’t help wandering, catching the outfit you had on. “…I saw those guys live a couple years ago.” At first, you weren’t sure if he was even talking to you, but then looked over in surprise. He abruptly gestured at your shirt, and when it clicked you tried not to laugh, “Oh yeah? How was that?”

“Nuts. Like, in a good way.” He was then whipping his phone out at light speed, but you didn’t mind, curiosity over asking for assistance giving way to the favor of seeing what sort of concert videos he took.

After all, you did like the band on your shirt.

Over the brief conversation, you had learned his name was Angel. The chat that followed had been interesting, laughing about wild concert stories, what kind of music you had to own physically, and you even got a few of his own favorites out of him.

He held a hand out, almost like he wasn’t about to jump back behind the counter and do his job while speaking. “Code Orange, ever heard of them?”

You scoffed, “Of course I have, I fucking rock with ‘em.” He sighed like a heavy weight had been taken from his body; maybe it was strictly from not knowing he could be someone more genuine until now. “They’re baller, right?”

Silence fell as you stuck your card in the chip reader, and you figured this wasn’t a terrible idea to find a way to get some more music speak out of the guy. “What’s the return policy at Fry’s, again?” You then asked. Angel cleared his throat, and answered without a hitch, “30 Days, standard policy.” You nodded, “Cool, thirty days to come back with a good date to ask the nice clerk with good music taste out on. I’ll consider it. Thank you, Angel.”

His exasperated expression suddenly grew horns, eyes wide as you took your headphones and walked away. You maybe made it three steps before you heard clambering behind the counter again, the man nearly breaking his own ankle trying to run out to catch up to you.

“Wait, wait. Hold on-!” He called, like you hadn’t already stopped in your tracks, beaming at him as he lost all his formality just to run up and say in a breathless hush. There was hesitation, almost a fresh pain at the mention of dating that made you reconsider – not for your sake, but possibly for his. You just met the guy, after all, but he had charmed you. Being in your twenties was all about taking those shots, trying it out.

He continued to fumble, almost dropping his phone as you kept your giggles stifled. "I a-actually lied, we don't fucking have a return policy-" You cocked your head at him, and taking a steadying breath he once again put his hands back on his hips.

“I mean... y-you don’t have to wait, do you?”

[fadinglandtragedy]

POTO Korea Review

August 9, 2023 Seoul

Cast : Jeon dong-seok, Sohn ji-soo, Song won-geun

[first review]

This one was my favorite.

JDS is insane. His voice is in the best shape these days, and his performance is very engaging. He seems to be gradually stepping out of the shadow of the Y&K Phantom and steadily building his own phantom. He still can't quite touch Christine and doesn't know how to treat her, but his attitude and mood captures the sassiness of the ALW phantom.

It's been a few days since I saw his previous performance, but I was surprised to see that his movements were more organized. This time I was able to see him more closely from a different angle, he really organized his hair nicely and walked like this :

Now I know why Christine actresses said he was so cool in that moment. Really seductive.

And he kept trying to whisper in Christine's ear at MOTN. It was like... it was the one scene that summed up why Christine couldn't resist the Phantom.

At the Red death scene, I was told it’s an recording, but he broke through the recording and sang it really loudly live. (I think the people in the front row could hear it.) His voice and the recording resonated, which seemed like another Phantom’s trick. and reminded me of the LEROUX Phantom playing with his voice... It was quite fascinating.

PONR… I like that he matches his movements with her in the Christine part.

My favorite scene was the one in Final lair where he was arguing with Raoul behind the bars. The original line, ‘I love her, does that mean nothing?’ was changed to ‘I love her, Why don't you believe in love?’ in the Korean. JDS, who had been bit relaxed, was momentarily unable to hold back his tears. I realized that his Phantom was the one who believed in the miracle of love more than anyone else in this musical…

With that, he started crying a lot... again, and I think it was more than the last performance. He kept showing signs of pulling himself together to hit his lines (especially when he heard ‘I gave my mind blindly’), and I could keep hear him sobbing in the silences. really don't know how he sings steadily in the middle of that… When Christine came to return the ring, he looked like wanted to tell her not to, but all I could hear was a sob.

He's crying like the world is ending, and behind him, Raoul kisses Christine's hand… yes it’s sad but also too beautiful. Can’t deny it.

I know it’s weird, but I like the moment right before he lassoed Raoul the best. His impressive use of elongated limbs reminds me of Leroux's Phantom. Sexy

I'd love to see his phantom on west end stage, if that's possible.. he'd look better in west end makeup

The chemistry between JDS & SJS is really 🤌 They're both settling into their acting, and when JDS shows his charms, SJS responds well to it.

I think Sohn ji-soo is going to be my new favorite Christine… Her dialog is a little awkward, but she's a former opera singer, so she's very good at conveying emotion through song, and also (of course) a good singer.

Overall, she is more passive, serene, and calm than SEH Christine. This time I saw in her a Christine from the 90s and 00s. A very early, almost archetypal Christine. She plays Christine as fragile and vulnerable, but that's what makes her shine in the graveyard scene. While SEH showed us a beautifully radiant prima donna making her debut in TOM, SJS brings a lush sadness to the Wishing.

She seems overwhelmed with how to get through this, but in the end, she moves forward unbroken. So her first step, Wishing, is even more impressive.

Her feelings toward the Phantom are similar to those of a mortal facing the Absolute. In The mirror scene, she fearfully soothes the Phantom, but when his anger is unabated and he tries to reveal himself, she willingly tries to open the dressing room door, despite her fears.(She must have thought he would be at the door. Love this detail!)

She was afraid to face the Phantom in STYDI (on the other hand, SEH didn't avoid his gaze.), but when he turned away in pain, she reached out her hand as if she wanted to hug him.

In the Final lair, she's upset to see herself in a wedding dress, but when the Phantom starts singing (this face, which earned~), she turns toward him as if mesmerized. (This reminds me of Claire Lyon in PONR)

She was clearly afraid of him, but also attracted to him. It's such a natural and obvious Christine’s trait, but it was great to see it again with the chemistry between JDS and SJS. I still remember her reaching for him as he painfully yelled at her to leave…

I saw her respond to being told that she had the biggest role in Don Juan by saying, "me…?". Funnily enough, JDS once interviewed that when phantom said, 'I've written you an opera,' the 'you' was referring to Christine.

I thought that Christine would have instinctively sensed the Phantom's obsession and affection and already known that she would be the one to play Aminta, but her Christine seems to think that his anger is simply a hate of her.

She was a relatively innocent and naive Christine, which seemed to work well with JDS's romantic side.

She and SEH Christine both sing along Carlotta's TOM in small voice, which is a detail I love because it's so cute and shows their desire to sing🥹

Oh and Korean fans call her a hamster… i can understand. She’s so lovely Christine!

I’m not sure about SWG Raoul… his presence was barely felt. I'm not sure if it was tiredness or what, but his performance had very little impact, and I felt like I was watching a character from another musical he was in.

But he was definitely milder than HGH, and I love the detail of him hugging Christine in the final lair, even though he's in a lasso.

I really like LJY Carlotta! Her performance was appropriate and impressive as a prideful prima donna. At the same time, her mean and demanding personality was well portrayed, making her an appealing character. Like the scene in Il Muto where she throws Christine into bed (Andre's panicked reaction is hilarious) or in Don Juan rehearsal where she gently teaches Piangi and gets annoyed with Monsieur Reyer in an instant are good examples.

When she says "she’s crazy," it's no longer sarcastic, but more like she's looking at a mentally ill person with disdain, which, coupled with PHR Piangi's reaction afterward, further emphasizes the relationship between the Phantom and Christine. (It shows how strange their relationship is and that it can't be shared with anyone.)

There were a lot of little funny scenes. The most interesting was the conductor's panicked performance with Andre in the Il Muto ballet scene. It was quite funny to see her panicking, searching for the score, and ruffling her hair.

why do the ballet girls' screams seem to get louder and louder...? 😂

The supporting cast is also working well together, and the performance is gradually becoming more complete. I was actually thinking that this production might not be for me, but um now I just wish I could follow this show and witness every moment..

If you sit in the first row, your neck can get sore, and you can barely see the Phantom on the angel. On this day, JDS was very emotional and the angel was swaying SO much that I wondered what was going on overhead.

There are no tickets left for me right now, but I hope this isn't the last time I see his phantom. I'd love to see it again as a JDS/SJS/HGH/LJY pair if I get the chance🙏

[the-blissful-one]

The Barbie Movie

So there has been a few days since the premiere, I have a few thoughts. Spoiler alert, for anyone who hasn't watched it. Also, long post alert!

I really liked the movie. It was funny and witty, and they way they just did things was really smart. I think it was smart to go with actors that are in the 30-40 age range instead of people in their twenties. It wouldn't have been the same and since this was a movie for adults mainly....it just made us relate to the characters more.

It was funny to see the intentional bad editing when Ken crashes into the waves and flips in the air. It really set the universe that these are just dolls that get played with...and that explains the sometimes weird movements and positions.

I also think it was great that the movie was more of a satire-movie of other movie tropes and Barbie itself. Had they taken themselves "serious", it wouldn't have been as funny or enjoyable. Like the chasing scene in the offices. It's clearly a hit to chasing scenes in other movies where they can literally reach other, but it has to look intense and hard. Plus when a movie or a tv-show is self aware, It's immdielty a ten points for me (as long as they dont oversue it).

What my problem with the movie was...or perhaps something I would have done differently is the speech of the mother about what women have to do to look attractive. I think the movie could have gone without it, but then I do think it would be a "backlash" of why they didn't talk about it. I think it would have been fine if they touched onto the issues, but the speech was a little too long and just weird to point out that it was only on women.

It was also a speech only about looks. Like feminism in the west (especially in the states) have taken a turn for the worse. We still need feminism in other parts of the world, where women need rights. Right to talk, right to wear what they want and not get beaten when they don't wear a head piece, where they can be independent and doesn't get promised away. Where newborn girls don't get killed just because they are a girl.

And the movie decided to point it light toward beauty standards. Why not point out real feminist problems and situations. It was just so shallow. I don't deny that men have put a lot of these standard in place, but women have too. I think now days, in the west at leas- women put more pressure on women. And women also put pressure on men. Why touch on the topic and not cover the whole problem???

It was very radical tiktok feminism in the move. If that is a way to explain it. I thought it was little unnatural how the teenager just unloaded onto Barbie when they fist met. I think it was because when my friends and I grew up and played with the dolls, they were just dolls with cool clothing and funny houses. It was just play. We knew we didn't look like that, but we didn't care. I think the whole barbie promotes bad beauty standards did comes from adults watching themselves not look like Babrie and then projected that. I am glad we have Barbies in different shapes and sizes, but acknowledging were it the dissatisfaction with the doll came from wouldn't have taken anything away from the message.

Through the movie, we see different types of Barbies, one in a wheelchair, one obese, all of them in different professions. Which I think it's fine and Barbie has all of these sides with her. But the Ken's were all like Calvin Klein models, had all six pack, were tall and just conventional attractive and the movie only shines a light on how women have too look to be attractive to be "respected".

Like, the pressure on boys to look a attractive, is immensely high. I think it's just as high as on women, just in a different direction. It doesn't need to be a competition on who has it worse. That is why i think the speech-scene was executed badly. She talked about that women have too look like this, but not too much, they have to be good at this, but not too got. Which are true, but when you have half of the cast already as a "victim" to beauty standards; it was just weird.

That kind of also falls into my next point. I have already seen that the obese barbie have gotten some backlash. I think it's fine that they had both her and the barbie in the wheelchair. But I think this was also executed badly too. If they wanted to sell the message that Barbie could look and be like anyone. Why only have one doll that has that body type or those physical handicaps. It just kind of stuck out like a sore thumb in a way. And it also just got highlighted because all of the Kens looked like models. Why not have an obese Ken. Or a Ken in a wheelchair. Or more than just one obese barbie. Why not have a few and let them to their thing as background characters- and then we see that Barbie can be anyone. We just see that they included those character because they had to. I think if it wasn't for the raise of the (toxic) body positivity movement now; they wouldn't have included an so overweight barbie. They kind of just did it because they felt like they needed to. I do hate when movies and tv-shows only have certain kind of character because they want woke-points instead of just telling a good story.

Another thing I turned my nose up at was when Barbie wanted to apologise for how she had treated Ken. She was met with resistance from the others (the mother, daughter and some of the others dolls). This is was I mean with the tiktok- feminism. It pushes the agenda that women can't do anything wrong and that self reflection aren't important. That women cant do anything wrong so why apologise when you have treated someone badly. They wanted to push that a women can do anything and are strong and powerful; but apologising to a man is a big NO NO. Like WTF. That is just childish. I'm glad that Barbie did apologise either way, but that message is just wrong. Growing up, also means that you need to see when you are the bad guy in someone else's story and then take action to fix whatever that is. Not say i'm perfect and then expect everyone else to not get hurt by you.

I did like that all of the Kens came together and was just all bros with each other at the end of the movie. That they weren't scared to hold hands and give a lil kiss during the Ken-song. It was nice. I did like the Kens as characters. It did really go well with the climax of the movie where both Barbie and Ken discovered that they could grown without being "defined" by each other...especially for Ken. I still wish they ended up together as close friends or something. I think we can still show characters growing and evolving, while they still chose to be surrounded by people who love and care for them. We see this tope in American movies a lot, where the protagonist decide to be alone and go out on adventure alone because that is apparently the only way to show independence. Not that independent is something you can be regardless of who you chooses to spend your time with. Did that makes sense...??? It's more on how it's shown in media that steers the characters action.

Overall, it was a very fun movie to watch and I will definitely watch it again. I just think a few things could have been though over twice or executed better. It was refreshing to see that most of the production just wanted to put out a good piece out there with a kind of tongue in cheek and self awake humour. I'm glad it wasn't anything more than that, but still tackled a few topics that both young and older adults can understand and relate to. Plus, it can be enjoyed by both poeple who had barbie dear to their hearts and people that doesn't relate too much towards the doll...and if people have a good time watching it; that is all that matters.

You are Kenough!

Nobody cares about my meaning, but at least this is my two cents on it. Enjoy your day and thanks for reading .

[twoidiotwriters1]

The Curse of Oenone (Leo Valdez xFem!Oc)

A/N: I had lots of fun writing this and the next three chapters :) -Danny Words: 2,555 Series' Masterlist Previous Chapter // Next Chapter Listen to: 'Teen Feet Tall' -by Sawyer

V: Are Those Feelings? Get Them Away From Me!

Before leaving, Percy pulls Leo and Ara aside and tells them Hazel's story. Partly so they understand why she acts weird sometimes, partly so Ara doesn't go around saying mean stuff about Nico.

Ara isn't surprised to hear there is another big-three kid around, she's just angry that Nico never told them, not even Lily, about Camp Jupiter.

She keeps wondering if she pressed Nico and Lily to fit in so much that they gave up and now they're just pretending to be okay to get her off their backs.

These thoughts do nothing to brighten her mood.

Last week Lily got into a fight with an Ares kid and busted his lip. I wasn't there to stop her because I was with Beckendorf, where I made a fan catch fire. Whoops, I guess. We're about to drive Michael crazy and cause him early baldness.

"For the thousandth time, Lily Saggio," our friend scolds her while organizing the supplies in the infirmary. "You cannot fight the entire Ares cabin. You should know better than to become their enemy."

"It's not her fault," I defend her, though most of my attention is on the legos I'm playing with.

"And you're no better!" He snaps immediately. "You and Tyson are a dangerous combination. He tries anything you want and you turn into a mad scientist with the free reign he gives you, your inventions always get out of control."

"So we are the ideal couple," I grin. "Because Tyson is immune to fire."

"That doesn't mean you can't die in one," Mike raises a brow. "Look, beasts, I've thought about it, and it's about time you calm down."

"What do you mean by that?" Lily stops the fidgeting with her stygian dagger.

"From now on you have to limit your problems to one every two weeks. I can't be looking after you all the time."

Lily and I share a look. I turn to our friend. "Don't you prefer a massage?"

Mike kicks us out of the cabin and Lily scoffs, putting her daggers away and taking half of my legos. "I don't know why you like him, he's a grumpy little jerk."

"Hush!" I look around frantically. I told her about my crush on Mike in secrecy but sometimes she brings it up in public like it's nothing, it freaks me out. "I don't know either, alright? I just do."

As the day goes on, I'm still thinking about Mike's request. He's right, we abuse the fact that he's always there to fix our problems.

"Hey," I sit next to him during the campfire. "What you asked this afternoon... I'll do it."

He looks at me, raising his eyebrows as if he can't believe what he's listening. "Really?

"It's time I learned manners, I think," I shrug, fixing my eyes on my feet. "The fires are not that fun anyway."

Mike hugs me and laughs, his entire body glows a pretty leaf-green color. Michael isn't a fan of physical affection, but when he does it, it means that he's really happy.

"Thank you, bug."

"No problem," I smile at him.

I don't know what to call Mike nowadays, my best friend, protector, or some sort of platonic crush. All I know is there's nothing in the world that I wouldn't do to keep him happy. I think he feels the same way.

Leo cheers up during the horse ride, which is surprising cause he's not a huge fan of living creatures, except Pollo. Maybe he's a fan of dangerous, crazy pets. He keeps touching the horse's side, eyes shiny as he pays close attention to his movements.

Ara's heart flutters, which she dislikes, cause she wants to stay grumpy for a little longer. When they dismount Arion, he goes wild, showing off his power.

"Show-off," Ara mumbles, stretching as she moves out of Arion's way.

"He needs to eat," Hazel informs them. "He likes gold, but—"

"Gold?" Leo makes a face.

"He'll settle for grass. Go on, Arion. Thanks for the ride. I'll call you."

The horse goes away and Ara scowls at the dust he leaves behind, why couldn't she be born a horse? Then she wouldn't have complicated thoughts.

"Well..." Leo kneels. "One problem solved, anyway. This is lime."

"The whole beach?" Hazel asks in surprise.

"Yeah. See? The granules are perfectly round. It's not really sand. It's calcium carbonate." 

Leo gathers a bunch of it in a ziploc bag, then pauses. He stares at the ground with a weird expression. "Leo?" Hazel speaks. "You okay?"

"Yeah," he clears his throat and continues. "Yeah, fine."

"We should've brought a pail and shovels," Hazel crouches beside him. 

Ara stands behind to keep an eye on their surroundings.

"We could've made a sand castle," Leo retorts.

"A lime castle."

Silence. 

Ara looks back and sees them gazing at each other the way she and Leo would do during their first quest together. That makes her want to do widely different things at the same time: Cry, or stab someone with her sword.

"I'll take a look around," she announces, causing them to jump. "You two hurry."

As soon as she's out of earshot, Ara kicks the sandy ground and curses in Italian. She's always found that cathartic because of how sharp the words feel on her tongue. 

She supports both hands on her knees and takes a deep breath. What is wrong with her? Her mother said turning fifteen meant she could handle bad news better, but it was a blatant lie. There is raw anger inside her, and she needs to get rid of it before it becomes a real problem.

"Ara!" Leo calls for her. "This way!"

Ara makes the conscious choice of staying behind so she can glare at them as they move forward. She's so busy doing this that she doesn't notice Hazel stopping and the girl crashes against her, almost sending Hazel to the ground but catching her before it happens.

"Sorry! What's..." She spots a woman in the middle of the road. "Oh."

As they get closer, Ara's deep-rooted rage increases, she doesn't understand what's going on.

"What are you doing?" Leo stops and blurts out: "Aunt Rosa?!"

The lady looks up and Ara gasps so sharply she gets a coughing fit. 

That woman looks just like her! A prettier, older version of her. Like the picture of her Chiron keeps in his office.

"Is that what you see?" The woman asks, eyes fixed on Leo. "Interesting. And you, Hazel, dear?"

"How did you—?" Hazel stammers in disbelief. "You—you look like Mrs. Leer. My third-grade teacher. I hated you."

The woman laughs. "Excellent. You resented her, eh? She judged you unfairly?"

"You—she taped my hands to the desk for misbehaving. She called my mother a witch. She blamed me for everything I didn't do and—No. She has to be dead. Who are you?"

"Oh, these two know," the woman glances at Ara before going back to Leo. "How do you feel about Aunt Rosa, mijo?"

Leo's jaw clenches. "Nemesis. You're the goddess of revenge."

Why does the goddess of revenge look like an older version of Ara? That doesn't make any sense. She doesn't hate herself!

"You see?" The goddess smiles. "He recognizes me. But you're having a lot of trouble facing the truth, right, Arae?"

Coming from the goddess, her name sounds like a mockery. "I don't know what you mean."

"Oh, don't play dumb, you were never that kind of Aphrodite," the woman looks down at the fortune cookies she's tearing apart. "You will have great fortune when you least expect it—That's exactly the sort of nonsense I hate. Someone opens a cookie, and suddenly they have a prophecy that they'll be rich! I blame that tramp Tyche. Always dispensing good luck to people who don't deserve it!"

"Uh... you know those aren't real prophecies, right? They're just stuffed in the cookies at some factory—"

"Don't try to excuse it! It's just like Tyche to get people's hopes up. No, no. I must counter her." Nemesis flicks a finger over the text and the letters turn red and change. "You will die painfully when you most expect it. There! Much better."

"That's horrible! You'd let someone read that in their fortune cookie, and it would come true?" Hazel exclaims.

"My dear Hazel, haven't you ever wished horrible things on Mrs. Leer for the way she treated you?"

"That doesn't mean I'd want them to come true!"

Ara can't always be perfect, but something awful will happen, and it is her fault. It's been her fault all along, according to her mother, so maybe she does hate herself enough to be her own nemesis.

"Bah. Tyche would be Fortuna for you, I suppose, being Roman. Like the others, she's in a horrible way right now. Me? I'm not affected. I am called Nemesis in both Greek and Roman. I do not change, because revenge is universal."

"What are you talking about? What are you doing here?" Leo questions.

The goddess opens another cookie. "To answer your question, Leo Valdez, the gods are in terrible shape. It always happens when a civil war is brewing between you Romans and Greeks. The Olympians are torn between their two natures, called on by both sides. They become quite schizophrenic, I'm afraid. Splitting headaches. Disorientation."

"But we're not at war."

"Um, Leo..." Hazel frowns. "Except for the fact that you recently blew up large sections of New Rome."

"Not on purpose!"

"I know, but the Romans don't realize that. And they'll be pursuing us in retaliation."

"Makes you reconsider some life choices, right, Jackson?" Nemesis grins at her. "Leo, listen to this girl. War is coming. Gaea has seen to it, with your help. And can you guess whom the gods blame for their predicament?"

"Me," he replies darkly.

"Well, don't you have a high opinion of yourself!" The goddess laughs. "You're just a pawn on the chessboard, Leo Valdez. I was referring to the player who set this ridiculous quest in motion, bringing the Greeks and Romans together. The gods blame Hera—or Juno, if you prefer! The queen of the heavens has fled Olympus to escape the wrath of her family. Don't expect any more help from your patron!"

"So why are you here?"

"Why, to offer my help!"

"Your help," Leo repeated skeptically.

"Of course! I enjoy tearing down the proud and powerful, and there are none who deserve tearing down like Gaea and her giants. Still, I must warn you that I will not suffer undeserved success. Good luck is a sham. The wheel of fortune is a Ponzi scheme. True success requires sacrifice."

What she hates most about Nemesis's speech, is that it sounds exactly like what she yelled at Lily before leaving camp.It wasn't luck, I worked hard to get here! Someone's holding her face in place, forcing her to look at the problem she created, and that she's spent a whole year pretending not to notice.

"Sacrifice?" Hazel asks in outrage. "I lost my mother. I died and came back. Now my brother is missing. Isn't that enough sacrifice for you?"

"Right now," Leo's hands are tightly closed. "All I want is some Celestial bronze."

"Oh, that's easy. It's just over the rise. You'll find it with the sweethearts."

"Wait," Hazel blinks. "What sweethearts?"

"You'll see. Perhaps they will teach you a lesson, Hazel Levesque. Most heroes cannot escape their nature, even when given a second chance at life. These two keep running into the same wall when the door is right in sight," Nemesis vaguely points to Ara and Leo.

A week ago, Ara wouldn't have known what the goddess meant, but now... all she wants is to stuff the lady's mouth with fortune cookies so she shuts up forever.

"And speaking of your brother Nico, you don't have much time. Let's see... it's June twenty-fifth? Yes, after today, six more days. Then he dies, along with the entire city of Rome."

"How..." Hazel stammers. "What—?"

"And as for you, child of fire." She turns to Leo. "Your worst hardships are yet to come. You will always be the outsider, the seventh wheel. You will not find a place among your brethren. Soon you will face a problem you cannot solve, though I could help you... for a price."

Leo's fingers burst into flames. Hazel steps back in alarm and the boy suffocates the fire by hiding his hand in the pocket of his jeans. "I like to solve my own problems."

"Very well."

"But, um, what sort of price are we talking about?"

"Leo, don't—" Ara starts, but the goddess lifts a hand to silence her.

"He's allowed to ask questions," the woman muses. "One of my children recently traded an eye for the ability to make a real difference in the world."

"You were Ethan's mom?" Ara raises a brow. "No wonder he was such a pain in the ass..."

Nemesis smiles. "When people say that, they're talking about pains that don't let them sit on said asses and force them to get up and do the work. You'll be a pain in the ass to many, Arae Jackson."

"Wait, let me get this straight," Leo intervenes. "You... want an eye?"

"In your case, perhaps another sacrifice would do. But something just as painful. Here." She tosses him a fortune cookie. "If you need an answer, break this. It will solve your problem."

 Ara has to suppress the urge to slap the cookie out of his hand. She doesn't want anything to happen to Leo. She lost Mike, Lily's angry at her, and so is Percy. If something were to happen to Leo... she's pretty sure it would make her go insane.

"What problem?"

"You'll know when the time comes."

"No, thanks," Leo replies, but he puts the cookie in his belt anyway.

Nemesis looks at Ara. "You'd need a bigger cookie to solve your predicament, pretty princess." She breaks another cookie and reads the paper. "You will have cause to reconsider your choices soon. Oh, how fitting! No changes needed here."

She reaches for Ara's hand, placing the small paper on it. The girl snatches it away. The last thing she needs is to doubt herself now, especially when the people she loves most in the world depend on her, disappointing them is simply out of the question.

"Very few gods will be able to help you on the quest," the goddess continues unbothered. "Most are already incapacitated, and their confusion will only grow worse. One thing might bring unity to Olympus again—an old wrong finally avenged. Ah, that would be sweet indeed, the scales finally balanced! But it will not happen unless you accept my help."

"I suppose you won't tell us what you're talking about," Hazel scowls. "Or why my brother Nico has only six days to live. Or why Rome is going to be destroyed."

"Oh, it's all tied together, Hazel Levesque," the lady hangs the bag of cookies over her shoulder and stands up. "As for my offer, Leo Valdez, give it some thought. You're a good child. A hard worker. We could do business. But I have detained you too long. You should visit the reflecting pool before the light fades. My poor cursed boy gets quite... agitated when the darkness comes."

Nemesis gives a long, amused look at Ara before departing on her motorcycle. "I'll have fun with you, mighty daughter of Greece." 

Again, Ara knows the nickname is meant to ridicule her. The goddess knows exactly who she once was. She should've seen it coming, given that Ara's curse was born from a nymph's hunger for revenge.

Hazel picks up a small piece of paper the goddess left behind, most likely on purpose.

"You will see yourself reflected, and you will have reason to despair," she reads out loud.

"Fantastic," Leo grumbles. "Let's go see what that means."

Next Chapter –>

Taglist.

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[skellymom]

hello, i noticed you have "elder goth" written in your bio and im like. an infant bat. do you have any tips on anything (music, makeup, clothing, ect?

(srry if this sounds awkward, im just a very nervous person)

Whew! I DIDN'T FORGET YOU!!! It was an INSANE weekend at work...and I'm burnt. Plus, I like to write my fics and answer asks at my desktop computer and not my phone (fat fingers are clumsy).

Ahem...ok for the Goth Thing:

It's really just about the music. That's it. I mean SO MUCH has evolved and developed since the first wave of that "genre" music appeared on the scene back in the 1970's (Post Punk) underground. Even some bands labeled as Goth now didn't see themselves as such back in the day.

This next list has a lot of good Goth music, with some songs not necessarily in that genre, but close enough that MANY in the community love them. And, some of them showed up before the movement even started (a few after to help with it's evolution), but definitely helped to establish the genre later on (ahem...David Bowie). Btw Marilyn Manson is NOT Goth. However, a LOT of us still love his music as it fits with our dark aesthetic...and remember when I mentioned David Bowie? Well, I am quite sure he helped inspired Marilyn Manson. His Mechanical Animals album certainly looks as it was influenced by Bowie. But, I digress, again... This is just a start on your musical journey...a stepping stone.

People will tell you that if you don't dress or present physically a certain way that you aren't Goth. NOPE. You can dress dark and spooky and edgy but not be Goth. You can dress like a pink princess or "normie" and be Goth at heart. When us older Children of the Night were coming up we did a LOT of DIY (do it yourself) and wore a lot of things you might not consider even Goth. There wasn't the depth, breadth, and easy access of things available on the market like today. We were poor, felt different, non conformist, and just looking for community. That's another hallmark of being a Goth: community. Because back in the day someone might do a violence on you for looking weird (Wearing all black back in the day was seen as extremely socially deviant. ESPECIALLY in small town US or conservative UK/England. People literally were afraid of or hated us. Our brethren: The Punks, Rastafarians, Metal Heads, Rappers, New Wavers (prejudice was doubled if you were a person of color, a different sexuality/gender, poor, etc.) experienced the same thing in society. Then came along The Satanic Panic and OH SHIT what a pain in the ass that was! And The "Moral" Majority crap...) I digress: we were looking for people like us, BUT THEY DIDN'T HAVE TO LOOK EXACTLY LIKE US. Just a bunch of nice, supportive people who got together to listen to music, dance, support the local bands/talent, and try to make it another day. You will find this in the FANDOM, LGBTQ+, and Communities of Color as well...and they overlap.

The presentation is secondary and up to you on how you want to look. You can do it up the max or just be simple in black. My favorite person from back in the day, who really doesn't specifically identify as Goth, but hung heavily in the scene back in the day: Neil Gaiman. The guy who gave us the character of Death from The Sandman Series, published as I was coming into my own Baby Bat phase (based on a real person named "Cinnamon"). Yeah...the character everyone aspires to look like (next to Siouxsie Sioux). He wears just plain black clothes and a long black coat. (Pic of him as a youngin')

Me, I go for "Lazy Goth". Everything black (even at work-black scrubs) with occasionally printed tee or a dark jewel toned piece of clothing. Usually I also mix in the Punk aesthetic too (I love the music and put patches on every damned thing). Punk is scruffy and imperfect, not fussy. I like comfort and ease of dressing. Especially in hot weather. And, I don't do a lot of face makeup, especially being older. Plus, I rather like my olive toned skin. Not every Goth needs to be pale. Google Goth People of Color. Beautiful and amazing looks.

Beware of Gatekeepers. Gothier Than Thou's. Don't let them crush your spirit. There is room in this subculture for everyone. If a particular club, group, or individual sets that tone, just move on. That shit ain't worth it.

Dropping a quote from my (sort of) GothFather creative Neil Gaiman:

"Go and make interesting mistakes, make amazing mistakes, make glorious and fantastic mistakes. Break rules. Leave the world more interesting for your being here. Make. Good. Art."

This can also be read as the journey to "create" yourself. You are on a journey, my sweet Child of the Night. It will take a while to find your stride, whatever that is, and that's totally ok. Spread your bat wings and FLY!

Leaving you with one of my favorite songs:

[saltywithsarcasm]

Posted chapter three of Hair of Gold

Sanji strolls into Nami's office, a tray with a vibrant fruity cocktail in his hand and smiles as he sees her deep in concentration, her brow slightly furrowed over her work.

“Hey, Nami-swan! Thought you could use a little break.” He swoons, setting the drink down on her desk with a casual wink and Nami looks up, her expression softening as she sees the drink.

“Thanks, Sanji.” She says, her tone polite but still carrying a hint of irritation, reminding him of the fight he had with Luffy back on Whole Cake Island. Sanji feels a pang of regret, knowing that his actions back then still weigh on her mind and he's been trying to make things up to both her and Luffy ever since, even giving Luffy more food than usual. Although their captain seems to have already forgiven him, she has not. He hopes that this small gesture might start to mend things between them. “You can go now.”

Sanji stands there, shuffling on his feet and tries to maintain his cool but there's a hint of nervousness in his movements. His eyes flicker around, avoiding direct contact with Nami's and his hands find their way into his pockets, fidgeting slightly.

“Just call for me if you need anything.” Sanji’s usual suave demeanor replaced with an almost desperate eagerness and leans in slightly, a hopeful smile stretching across his face, his voice a bit too enthusiastic. His eyes are wide, almost pleading as if he's trying too hard to get on her good side. His hands still fidgeting nervously, betraying his attempt to appear nonchalant. “I’ll be an earshot away.”

“Mm-hm.” Nami is already ignoring him as she gets back to her charts, her focus completely shifting away from Sanji. This kills him a bit inside; His shoulders slump slightly and the hopeful light in his eyes dims. He stands there for a moment longer, swallowing hard before turning away with a forced smile, trying to mask the sting of her indifference. “Sanji.” He turns on his heel, eager to fulfill whatever request she might have. “Luffy told me you had a panic attack earlier, you okay?”

“Of course, Nami, dear. Don’t worry about me.” Sanji motions to her reassuringly, relieved that even though she’s still clearly mad at him, the fact that she still cares enough to ask means a lot. The navigator, however, looks at him skeptically, one eyebrow raised as she crosses her arms, clearly not buying it just yet. “It was nothing, just…got caught up in my thoughts.”

“About Big Mom or your family?” Sanji hesitates, not wanting to burden Nami with his own problems, knowing she’s got enough on her plate but also knows that she’s persistent and will get the information out of him one way or another.

“I'm worried my family might try something like that again…” Sanji is afraid of Big Mom and he knows the rest of the crew shares that fear but despite that looming threat, he finds comfort in his trust for Luffy. He believes wholeheartedly that their captain will protect them all, no matter how terrifying she is. “And I don't want you guys to get hurt because of me.”

“I doubt your father-I mean, that man will try anything again.” Nami turns in her chair to face him, her expression serious and he forces a smile, doing his best to change the subject.

“So, what's the next island on our route?”

“You know we won’t let them near you again, right?” Sanji's smile falters slightly as he realizes his attempt hasn't worked and deflates a bit, giving a small nod in acknowledgment. “And Vito from Capone's crew offered to send some extra muscle to the Baratie to protect Zeff and his men for you.”

“…Huh?” Sanji tilts his head, trying to place the name then it hits him, Vito is the weird guy who was really infatuated him when he was taken from Zou. “Why would do that? We’re from rival crews.”

They maybe be in shaky alliance with them but it’s nothing like their alliance with Law.

“Don’t know but he was asking if you had vivre card too.” Sanji feels his skin crawl because Vito's interest wasn't even in him as a person but because of his family, family he wants nothing to do with. “It’s a little odd but if him being a fanboy benefits us, I suggest giving him a little attention when we run into their crew again.” Sanji sighs, knowing she's right. Despite his discomfort around the man, the idea of some of Capone's men watching out for Zeff does bring him a small sense of comfort. “But if he starts acting a little too weird, let us know and we’ll get him to back off.”

“Anything for you, my sweet!” Sanji gives a bow to her and freezes for a moment when he feels her hand in his hair, ruffling it approvingly.

“Good boy.” She tells him and Sanji practically gushes, his heart racing with excitement from the praise and slight display of affection after she’s been giving him the cold shoulder recently.

Sanji leaves her to her work, feeling like a weight has been lifted off his shoulders and walks away with a spring in his step, heading back to the kitchen to whip something for lunch.

[longislandcharm]

TIMING: Mid March LOCATION: Outside Regan's place PARTIES: @longislandcharm and @recoveringdreamer SUMMARY: Winter is distracted as she's trying to navigate her home renovation, Felix is doing an odd job for Regan while...on stilts? Things don't go so well. CONTENT WARNINGS: Clown tw (towards the end)

Stilts were hard. They’d been surprisingly easy to find — it turned out you could buy just about anything in Wicked’s Rest if you were dedicated enough — but using them? That was a whole other story. Maybe part of their problem had been in buying one of the taller options, leaving them towering over their usual height. The jaguar’s balance was offering some reprieve, but Felix got the feeling the spirit was a little irritated with their antics. Or, you know, whatever the jaguar spirit version of irritated was. It was hard to say. 

Either way, they were pretty sure they looked ridiculous. Stomping around a stranger’s yard in stilts, yelling at squirrels… it was a bad look, right? It was a worse look when one of aforementioned squirrels bumped against the stilts as it ran for the tree, providing the proverbial hair that broke the camel’s back. Felix found themself teetering forward, unable to stop their momentum as they fell. “Oh crap, oh no, oh — uh — timber?” 

They crashed to the ground in spectacular fashion… landing on top of someone else. Whoops. 

She really should have been paying attention to her surroundings, especially knowing what went down in this town, but Winter was too busy typing furiously on her phone as she argued with a contractor. How hard was it to restore crown molding the right way? She’d just hit send when she heard a familiar voice yelling out something about timber mixed with Henry calling for her to move, making her look up just in time to see an incredibly tall Felix coming- no, falling, towards her. 

It happened so quickly that she was splayed out on the ground in pain before she could even process what was going on. Her phone had skidded across the sidewalk when she tried to use her hands to brace her fall, stopping the ground from making a mess of her pretty face. Unfortunately, her hands were not so lucky. “Felix! What the hell?”  

They were still on top of her, Winter taking the moment to look at her hands that were now skinned up and bleeding slightly. “What the hell is going on? Why are you so tall?” They needed to answer her quickly or else she was just going to keep going with the questions. Oh god, were they cursed? Did some weird spellcaster blow through town and make them some sort of giant? It was the only explanation.

They recognized her as the dust settled, because of course they did. It wasn’t enough that Felix would fall on top of someone while trying to maneuver around on stilts to scare squirrels away from some lady’s bones; the person they fell on had to be one of the only actual friends they had. Pain shot through them as they landed but — for better or worse — Winter cushioned most of their fall. Which meant nothing cushioned her fall. Which made Felix feel pretty awful.

“I’m sorry!” They said quickly, rolling off her as best they could. Given the stilts of it all, it was the kind of thing far easier said than done; the movements were clumsy and uncoordinated, with an awful lot of flailing as they separated their limbs from Winter’s — and the stilts. “Sorry,” they said again, finally successfully rolling out of the way so that they were spread out beside her in the grass. They looked up into the trees. They swore one of the squirrels was laughing.

Turning their head back to face Winter, they furrowed their brow at her bleeding hands. “Are you okay? Let me help you. I didn’t — I really didn’t mean to knock you over.” They glanced down at their legs. “Oh. Uh… I’m wearing stilts. There was — This lady wanted me to kill her lawn, and then she was like ‘scare the squirrels so they don’t steal my bones’ and I was like ‘but what if the squirrels aren’t afraid of me,’ and it just kind of, like, snowballed, I guess? And now I’ve got these stilts, but I don’t really know how to walk on them, and I don’t even think the squirrels are afraid of me but I also don’t think they really even want the bones, so…” They trailed off, shrugging. “You know how it is.”

Finally, they were off of her. She scrambled to sit up and move to sit on her butt, trying her best to not use her hands. Thank god for yoga. Winter raised a sculpted eyebrow at them, higher and higher as the story continued. She took in killing a lawn and squirrels and bones but she didn’t really follow what they were saying though some of that could have been because of Henry laughing in the background. Jerk. “Hey Felix, newsflash: Nobody knows how that is.” She really didn’t know if anyone would understand that story but she somehow had a feeling that someone was manipulating them and that didn’t sit right with her…even if they had just smushed her. “Wait, who is this lady that is asking you to scare squirrels? Bones, kill their lawn…it doesn’t sound right.”

Her hands got her attention next after ignoring their request to see them. If this was the worst thing that came out of the fall then she should be grateful. Using her hands to shield herself from the ground could have been disastrous for her wrists but thankfully she could move both of them just fine. Her palms on the other hand were scraped pretty badly. “It’s fine, Felix, they should be okay. Just need to clean them up when I get home or something.” She wasn’t fond of people fussing over her, even if it had been their fault that Winter was hurt in the first place. She’d rather take care of it herself back at the house than have them stressing over it. It wasn’t like they could do anything anyway.

Henry leaned over her shoulder to look at them himself, the ghost sucking in a breath through his teeth. “I don’t know Winter, you might need some band aids for your boo boos.” She turned her head to glare at him , her voice harsh when she looked back at the raw skin on her hands, believing that Felix could see and hear this whole conversation. “Why don’t you go back to laughing your ass off and leave me alone?”

Okay, that was fair. Felix’s experiences were not universal. They probably should have known that, given the fact that the stilts they’d bought from the guy in the store had been gathering a pretty thick layer of dust before they’d made the purchase, as well as the fact that they’d gotten odd looks from just about everyone who’d seen them today. Scaring squirrels on stilts was not a normal thing to do, noted. They offered Winter a small smile and a shrug. “I guess that’s fair.” At the question, the glanced towards the apartment building despite knowing that Dr. Kavanagh wasn’t inside. “Um, the medical examiner? I was asking about odd jobs, and she said she wanted me to kill her grass and bring her any bones I found, and I was like, ‘Well, what if the squirrels take the bones,’ and she was like, ‘You have to scare the squirrels,’ and I guess things just kind of spiraled from there because now I have stilts!” 

They were a little out of breath after recounting the tale, which was done without really stopping to breathe. They looked at Winter for a moment — to assess her for injuries, to see her reaction to the story, both. Concern etched over their features even as she assured them that she was fine. “I — I can help, maybe. Um, if you want? It’s my fault, so…” They weren’t sure what to do with their hands, folding and unfolding them absently in front of them. 

Felix watched as Winter turned to glare, blinking their eyes into the jaguar’s briefly so they could catch sight of the ghost she was speaking to. It was the same one they’d seen the first time they met Winter; it must have been stuck to her still, following her wherever she went. Felix let their eyes shift back from yellow to brown, the ghost disappearing from their view as they did so. “Probably better off laughing at me,” they offered with a sheepish smile.

The medical examiner…why was she not surprised? Okay, knowing who it was now, Winter wasn’t as sure that they were being manipulated into something for a giggle or whatever rocks people got off with stuff like this. Regan was someone who believed in such weird things that it was totally plausible she thought she was asking them to do something like this because it needed to be done. She still rolled her eyes, looking up as if asking a higher power for help. “Why would a squirrel steal her bones? Why would there be bones in her yard in the first place?” There were so many questions to ask and she honestly wasn’t sure she was willing to hear the answers. It was exhausting listening to the first couple of explanations. 

Her gaze fell back to Felix’s concerned eyes and her annoyance started to melt away a little. They hadn’t meant to fall on top of her. All they were trying to do was earn a little extra cash and she could respect that. “I don’t know, do you have any wound care experience? I’m guessing so since you do that underground fighting thing.” Accepting help wasn’t that easy but Winter saw an opportunity. It wasn’t help if she paid them for their time, right? Which is what their goal was for today anyway. “We might need to get those stilts off before you crush someone else, though.”

Again, with their words, her anger started to melt to nothing. Always willing to take the brunt of it all for others, weren’t they? “Or he could mind his own business for once.” Henry shook his head, still smiling at the whole scene, but that smile fell when he saw the flash of Felix’s eyes at the last second. Winter stayed blissfully unaware but her ghost friend was left to wonder if it was a trick of the eye. Did ghosts’ have those? 

“I don’t know,” Felix admitted. In all honesty, his conversation with Dr. Kavanagh had gotten away from them just a little. That wasn’t really rare for conversations Felix had — more often than not, things spiraled into something that made no sense long before they could put a stop to it — but things like this coming from it were… a little more rare. They had a lot of strange conversations that didn’t end with them on stilts trying to scare bone-stealing squirrels away from the medical examiner’s yard. But the chips fell where they fell, sometimes. You just had to learn to roll with the proverbial punches. “She said she had bones in her yard, I didn’t want to ask why. Maybe it’s for her work?” Did medical examiners bring bones home? Felix didn’t know enough about the profession to be sure one way or the other.

A little sheepish, they nodded their head. “Yeah,” they confirmed, “I do.” The Grit Pit didn’t bother employing medical personnel for their fighters. You were expected to take care of any injuries you sustained on your own time and come back ready to fight again the following night. Felix’s first aid kit was well stocked as a result, and their wound-patching ability was pretty top notch by necessity. “You’re probably right about the stilts, though. I think the stilts are a bad idea.” Which they really should have seen coming. They had good balance, but no experience on stilts. Stilts were probably more of a ‘practice makes perfect’ kind of thing.

“That’s probably a lot less fun.” After all, what better things did ghosts have to do? There was a reason they tended to cling to anyone who could see them; when you went so long without being seen or heard, it was natural to cling to anyone who could offer some reprieve from that. “Are you okay coming back to my apartment with me? It’s not far, and I’ve got a first aid kit. And a beer, which I definitely owe you.”

“Because that’s not suspect.” Even if it was for work, Winter was certain that burying them in her own yard wasn’t legal. They had government sanctioned ground for that, didn’t they? It wasn’t her concern though, whatever the medical examiner was up to was her problem. She just hoped that Felix wasn’t getting caught up in something illegal just to keep squirrels out of it. “Do you usually take on a job of this nature without…asking questions? I feel like this needs more information on your part.” Yea, she was going to have to look out for them wasn’t she? If not, they were going to end up in so much trouble.

“Ya think?” Winter wasn’t trying to be mean but sometimes the medium couldn’t stop the words from leaving her mouth before she thought about it. There was no venom to her words though, they seemed to be a little good natured despite the whole situation. Gingerly, she got to her feet, doing to her best not to put too much weight on the wounded parts of her hands but she still had to suck in a breath as pain radiated up her arms. “You should probably have some mats around next time you’re on them. There’s not always going to be a pretty girl walking by to catch your fall.”

The invitation struck nothing but a sliver of gratitude in her but she heard Henry clear his throat to try and get her attention. Looking his way, she noticed that he was staring intently at Felix, his hand moving back and forth as if trying to get their attention. But Felix was either ignoring the ghost or…couldn’t see him at all. It wasn’t entirely surprising, not after her conversation with someone online. Winter had suspected for some time now that Felix wasn’t being truthful about what they were but this was the first time she could confirm that they couldn’t actually see ghosts all of the time. “I don’t think you should go with them.”

She could see why Henry was hesitant. They were lying about something, that much was obvious, but she was sure that Felix wasn’t dangerous. The puzzle had come together over time and the medium suspected that the truth hadn’t come because Felix was scared of her. “That’d be great, actually. I might skip the beer, though. I’m a lightweight and I have to keep some contractors in line today.” Henry gave her a look but she just shrugged a shoulder at him, not wanting to get into this conversation right now. One of these days this ghost was going to get tired of trying to save her ass and let her perish.

“She works with the police,” Felix said. “I think, anyway. Medical examiners work with the police on TV. I’ve seen Law and Order.” There was a pause. “Some of it. A couple episodes.” Had anyone seen all of Law and Order? They were pretty sure there were about a thousand seasons of it, and surely no one had that much time on their hands. Especially not when most of the episodes seemed to be more or less the same, anyway. But… that was off topic, wasn’t it? Felix had a way of doing that, especially around people like Winter. It wasn’t her fault she made him so uneasy; he would have been the same around any other medium, too. “I needed some extra money. My, um, my hours got cut at work.” That was a kind way of putting things, wasn’t it? But Felix didn’t want to think about that now. 

Felix let out a sheepish chuckle at her words, shrugging a shoulder. She was right — it was kind of an understatement to say that the stilts were a bad idea. That was always going to end in disaster and, if anything, Felix had gotten lucky that it was Winter he’d landed on. Anyone else might have gotten angry, and Felix had never been good at dealing with other people’s anger. Winter was a good sport, even though she was clearly in pain. Felix felt another stab of guilt for the unease they couldn’t shake around her. “I think I just won’t use the stilts again. I can probably just sell them online or something.” Was that irresponsible? Maybe they should make sure whoever bought them was better at using them than they were.

Without their eyes shifted at all, Felix was unaware of the ghost staring at them. They kept their eyes on Winter, not thinking about the spirit at all. If asked, they could always claim that they’d gotten good at ignoring the dead in some attempt to better fit in with society as a whole, and Winter might believe them. She didn’t know much about the supernatural world as far as Felix could tell, so there was every chance she had no idea that any other species could see ghosts at all. It felt a little bad, lying to her, but… It was for everyone’s own good, wasn’t it? Felix’s, and Winter’s, too. 

“Okay,” Felix nodded, offering her a smile. “Yeah, no worries there! I totally get that. We can drink juice instead!” That was probably the better idea, anyway. Felix was something of a lightweight themself, and they weren’t looking to get drunk enough to spill any proverbial beans here. “What are you doing with contractors? Um, if that’s okay to ask.”

“Yea, that doesn’t mean much. The police can be dirty too.” The look she gave Felix as they went on to talk about Law and Order was something akin to…pity? Not quite that but close, Winter wondering briefly if Felix knew that not everything on television was real. She was a shining example of that fact. Medical examiners working with the police most likely was, but regardless she hoped they didn’t get most of their facts that way. “Besides, whatever she’s doing with these bones I really don’t think it has anything to do with the police. She’s a little off, if you haven’t noticed.” But who wasn’t? The barrage of characters she had met lately were exceedingly more and more eccentric. At least it was entertaining. 

Their comment on their funds had her pressing her lips together. Winter could offer them some jobs around her new house but would they get offended by that? She didn’t know how much pride Felix held or if they would think she was legit with her odd jobs but she really could have used the help, especially with useless contractors constantly on her nerves. If anything, she hoped that Felix knew that she was most definitely not the type of person to make up jobs just to hand them money. “I mean, if you need extra funds I have a few things you could do for me.”

She left it at that, casual, hoping that it didn’t seem like a pity offer and then she moved on. “I think that’s a good idea. The not using them thing, I don’t know about selling them. Someone might hurt themselves even worse on those things.” But again, they did need the funds, didn’t they? “Maybe you can find a nice circus nearby or something?” Because who else used stilts? “Or a painter! Oh I have some working with me right now, maybe they need them.” 

Henry was still hesitant about all of this, the ghost eyeing Felix up and down as if they were the last person in the world they trusted. Winter kept an eye on him but she also noticed that Felix wasn’t paying him any attention either. Another sign that they couldn’t see him at all considering the fact that they would probably be scared stiff if they could. “Winter, I don’t like this.” She rolled her eyes and started to move in the direction she had been coming from before, looking back at them as she did. “I will take a juice. And I’ve got contractors doing some work on the new house I just got. It was an older one and needed some updating. That’s what I was talking about when I said I have some jobs for you if you’d like.”

“That’s fair,” they laughed uneasily. They’d seen cops at the Grit Pit before, in the crowd; there was something undeniably uncomfortable about it, though that might have just been because Felix found most things at least a little uncomfortable. Case in point: this conversation. They felt itchy all over, like they were doing something wrong, somehow. Winter was looking at them with an expression people sometimes got, on that wasn’t irritation but might not be a positive thing, either. They rubbed at the back of their neck, shrugging a shoulder. “I think she’s nice.” Dr. Kavanagh had always been kind to Felix, even when they misunderstood what she was talking about. That wasn’t something they could say of everyone; usually, people got frustrated. He didn’t think she was doing anything she shouldn’t be with the bodies or the bones. She seemed to respect them too much for that.

They shifted their weight a little at Winter’s offer. With their monetary issues, the idea of doing work for her for additional funds was certainly tempting, but… wouldn’t it make her more likely to realize that they were lying about the origin of their ability to see ghosts? What if she got angry? Or concerned enough to arrange an exorcism? The very thought made their mouth go dry, and they shook their head quickly. “No, that, uh… That’s okay. I really appreciate the offer, but I — Dr. Kavanagh is paying me pretty well, so I probably won’t have any problems after this.” It wasn’t the whole truth; Dr. Kavanagh was being pretty generous, but one job wouldn’t solve all of Felix’s money problems. Still, it seemed preferable. Less… dangerous. 

“Well, maybe I could vet who I sell them to? Make sure they go to someone who knows how to use them? I could… make them test the stilts before they leave. So I can make sure they’re not lying.” A circus was a good idea, though Felix had no idea if there was one nearby. A painter seemed… a little more questionable. “I don’t know if they could paint and walk at the same time with the stilts. It might be a little hard.”

They smiled as she agreed to the juice, relieved that they had some small way to make up for landing on her. “That’s cool. Um, the house thing, I mean. I’ve never bought a house before. Was it… uh… fun? Buying the house. I mean, they make TV shows about it, right? House shopping. I see them sometimes when I’m channel surfing. People argue a lot on them, though.”

Glad that they agreed with the police nonsense, Winter moved on to the fact that they thought the medical examiner was nice. That didn’t say much either as she realized they thought she was nice too even after how aggressive she had been when they’d first met. “Can I ask you something without offending you? Because I’m not trying to, I’m curious though. Do you think you have a problem with trusting people too easily?” From the moment they met, the medium had known that she made Felix nervous. She hadn’t cared at the time, more focused on trying to find out information about the ghost who refused to talk to her than their feelings, and yet they still continued to go to lunch with her that day. And then continued to hang out with her afterwards even if all of those times had been the result of running into each other. 

It wasn’t surprising that her offer had been rejected, it’s what she would have done too, but she really did want to find a way to help Felix. As much as she believed in people earning their own money (Something that she probably shouldn’t considering she was a nepo baby) this person had been nothing but kind to her considering how much she terrified them. Maybe she could do something anonymously, have someone else hire them through her funds. “Fair enough. But if you ever need any more help, I’m sure I could find something for you. Don’t be afraid to ask.” 

An audition? Why didn’t she think of that? It was her field, after all. “That might work, actually. You wouldn’t even have to be afraid they’d run away without paying because…who could?” Right? Could people run on those things? That would take some talent. “You should definitely audition anyone who wants to buy them.” Winter nodded, as if the decision was set even if they weren’t her stilts. It was obvious that that was the solution to their problem. 

“So, wait, you watch Law and Order and house hunting shows but you never saw Spirit Speak? I’m a little offended here.” There was humor to her words, the medium shooting them a smile to show that she was kidding. There was no need to make them more nervous even if Henry wasn’t their biggest fan right now. “Winter, did you see their eyes? They can’t even hear me right now.” She ignored it, shooting Henry another look and the ghost huffed. What was even the point anymore? “It wasn’t that much fun, no. More stressful than anything. But that might be because I’m picky.”

Her question was certainly a fair one, and it was difficult to be offended when Felix knew that the answer was an unquestionable yes. Yes, they trusted people far too easily. Wasn’t that how they’d wound up in their predicament at the Grit Pit? Wasn’t that how Leo had taken advantage of them for years? Wasn’t that why they still felt something for him, even after all he’d done? Felix looked down at their feet with a shrug. “Some people have said that, sure.” It was the kind of thing their father had hated about them, they knew. Felix’s trust in people, he’d said once, would get the entire family killed someday. Thinking back to that empty cabin, Felix wondered if their family felt safer now that it wasn’t a concern. 

Still, they didn’t think it was always wrong to trust people, no matter what had happened because of it. Trusting Winter wasn’t easy, given the whole medium of it all, but it was worth it, wasn’t it? She was offering to help them out, expecting very little in return. Didn’t that mean his trust in her was well founded? Didn’t that mean they were making a good choice, for once? They offered her a small smile, nodding. “I really appreciate that. I’ll, um… I’ll keep it in mind.”

The small, shy smile widened into more of a grin as Winter claimed their idea was a good one. “It might be fun to see someone who knows how to walk with them doing it, too. Like a show, right?” People paid money to see people walk on stilts at the circus and stuff, didn’t they? And, with this particular plan in mind, Felix could get paid for it. It felt almost wrong, like they were scamming people, but the people in question got stilts in the end, didn’t they?

Laughing a little nervously, Felix shrugged. “Um, medium shows aren’t really… my thing.” She could assume it was because they were a medium, since that was what they’d told her. Surely it made sense, didn’t it? For a medium to have little interest in watching a reality show about mediums? The truth of the matter — that a medium reality show was something like a found footage horror film to someone who’d grown up with the impression of mediums that Felix had — never needed to see the light of day. “Oh. Well, there’s nothing wrong with being picky! You know what you like, right? That’s a good thing.”

“I just wish you were a little more careful, is all.” And yet they never would have been friends if they were more careful. If Felix had let their nerves win that day when they’d spotted Henry she probably wouldn’t have spoken to them again afterwards, the girl usually not having any time for people who ran away from things. Plus, the doctor wasn’t that bad. But there was so much around here that could make Felix’s trust go a different way and she didn’t enjoy that thought. Winter actually cared for them despite the caution they still held onto around her, caution that she now understood. “But what do I know? I tend to find myself in weird situations around here too.” Boy, was that an understatement.

Henry still wasn’t letting it go though. He kept huffing at everything she said, making snide comments in the background, and Winter now knew for sure that Felix couldn’t hear him. Not that she’d had doubts. Her conversation with someone online had given her an insight to what Felix could potentially be with every word that person said confirming the suspicion more and more. They were scared of her (mediums terrified them), they could see ghosts only on occasion (When they chose to do so), there was a lot of evidence that she couldn’t overlook. Pressing her lips together, she debated on whether or not to ask her next question. She was never one to back down from a challenge though. “You know I’d never hurt you, right?”

She wanted it out there. All they had to do was say yes and she’d drop it, never mention anything about balam or Felix’s fear of her until they were ready. But the medium wanted to plant those seeds so that the trust could grow, so that they’d one day be comfortable to talk to her about what they were. 

Unless she was very wrong about all of this.

“Felix, I do believe you have a good plan on your hands. I’ll help organize it if you want….but no clowns. I don’t enjoy clowns.” It was the stupidest fear to have but one John Wayne Gacy documentary when she was too young to watch had instilled it in her. “I mean, they can show up, they just can’t have makeup on. I’ll accept the big red nose if you must.” 

Giving them a knowing smile, Winter nodded. “I was joking with you. I remember that you weren’t really into them. I will be sure to keep the cameras away if I’m ever able to get them here.” A future goal, that much was true. She could practically feel Henry rolling his eyes. “You wouldn’t be here if it wasn’t for that show, stop the grumbling.” She glanced back to find him still not happy with her for ignoring him in the first place. “Oh I definitely know what I like. Tell that to my realtor though. I think she was ready to strangle me at one point.”

“Right.” Felix looked down at their feet, shifting their weight uncomfortably. It wasn’t unlike what their father and siblings used to say, was it? Their father had been crueler about it, but hadn’t their sisters said it with the same empathetic concern that clung to Winter’s tone now? They should be more careful. They knew that. They shouldn’t trust people immediately, shouldn’t jump at the chance to put their faith in someone new, but they couldn’t help it. Felix had always wanted people to be better than what they were, had always believed that they could be. It felt like a necessary thing because what was the point without it? But… they’d probably fall off of stilts way less often if they were a little more wary when they needed to be.

It felt abrupt, her promise that she’d never hurt them. Felix’s eyes darted up to meet hers, brow furrowing. Did he know that? On some level, they trusted Winter in spite of their reservations. But those reservations were still a thing that existed. They’d grown up hearing horror stories about exorcisms, lived all their life aware of the cruel possibility of dying torn in half by someone who thought they were helping or who wanted to play god. They knew Winter wasn’t the latter, but what if she was the former? What if she wanted to ‘save’ Felix by separating them from the jaguar? They didn’t think she was an exorcist, but she could know them. She could enlist them, she could even just mention, offhand, what Felix was if she knew. Maybe Winter would never intentionally hurt them, but a lot of things could be done unintentionally, too. 

Still, it was unfair to put those kinds of expectations on her, so Felix forced a small smile. They nodded their head, they looked back down at their feet. “Yeah,” they said quietly, “I know.” And they did, they thought. They knew that Winter would never hurt them on purpose, but that didn’t make the discomfort go away. That didn’t make them any less afraid of what she might do without meaning to. 

It was a relief to talk about something else, in any case, and Felix let out a short but genuine laugh. “I don’t like clowns, either, so that’s something I can agree to.” Were there people who did like clowns? Felix didn’t think they’d ever met anyone who wasn’t at least a little unsettled by the very concept of the performers. They were pretty sure that clowns knew as much and played it off, at this point. 

Another rush of relief came with Winter’s promise that, if her show ever came to Wicked’s Rest, the cameras would steer clear of Felix. The idea of her show filming in town wasn’t a great one, but at least they knew they wouldn’t have to be on it. “I’m sure it makes it hard for the realtor,” they laughed. “But it’s good over all! You know, you shouldn’t have to… to settle.” Wasn’t that what Felix had done their entire life? They settled over and over and over again. There was some comfort in knowing that Winter refused to do so. 

She could only watch Felix as their mind processed everything that was being said. It was unlike Winter to let things hang in the air like this, the girl usually pushing forward with a different subject or continuing to press the current one, but with Felix she usually had a little more patience. It might have been their kindness or the soft demeanor they always held onto no matter what, but either way she held some sort of soft spot for them. It was the most unusual thing for her to find so many people in this small town that were slowly infiltrating her usual defenses. She’d never expected it. It had never once happened in Los Angeles, never once happened in Long Island, and yet here she was worrying about how this person felt in her presence, wanting them to feel safe. 

There was a silent promise to let the subject go if they told her what she wanted to hear and they had. Even though she didn’t want to, she let the subject drop, only nodding at them to show she’d heard them. 

“Winter, someone lying to you isn’t trust even if they’re telling you otherwise.” Henry was right. It wasn’t but she was okay with that. She waved Henry off, hoping the ghost would let it all go as it was getting exhausting to hear his arguments and hold back from telling him to shut up. “We can talk about it later.” She gave the ghost a pointed look, harsher than it should have been. He was only worried after seeing so many things happen in this town as he stood by her side but he wasn’t getting the hint. 

“Oh, thank goodness. I thought I was going to have to talk you down or something. Stilts and clowns made too much sense.” She shivered a little, showing her complete discomfort with the idea as if she hadn’t already voiced it to them. “But yea, let's do it. I think it’ll be fun.” 

Her hands burned as they continued to walk, a reminder of where they were actually going, and she had to flex them to get the pain to settle. The movement earned another grunt from her grumpy ghost trailing behind even further than before. Henry was pissed. “No one should have to settle for anything if they don’t want to. Easier said than done, I know.” She wondered about the pause that had floated between their words. They probably had to settle for a lot in their life from what little she knew of it and that thought brought a pang of guilt to her heart. “If you ever need any help with getting what you deserve, Felix, let me know.”

Winter was speaking to her ghost, and Felix should have been able to see him. After all, their friendship with Winter was founded on the idea that Felix, too, was a medium. But, in such close quarters, they didn’t want to shift their eyes to the jaguar’s to spot the ghost and listen in on the conversation. It would be more noticeable shifting now than it would have been to have had their eyes shifted all the while, after all. So Felix only pretended to hear both sides of the conversation, acted as though the way they looked away was out of respect and a desire to keep from interrupting rather than a lack of knowledge as to where Henry actually was at the moment.

They were curious, of course, what Winter and her ghost would speak of later, but they didn’t want to push. They didn’t want to mess up the delicate balance they’d created here. After all, Felix had already fallen from an impressive height once today, and it was nothing short of a miracle that no one was hurt. They didn’t think they’d get so lucky a second time.

“No, no need to talk me down here! We’re definitely on the same page.” Felix laughed, and despite their stress, it was genuine. They did really like Winter, even if some part of them was afraid of her. They liked spending time with her. She was cool.  They wished things were as simple as Winter made them out to be, wished they lived in a world where not settling for things they didn’t want was a genuine possibility. But it was more complicated than that, wasn’t it? Even if Felix deserved better than what they had — something they weren’t sure was true — there was no way for them to get it. Still… It meant something that Winter wanted to help. They smiled, nodding their head and pretending it wasn’t a lie when they spoke again. “Yeah,” they said. “Of course. Thanks, Winter.”