#so no worries im not speaking in a secret language

[enden-k]

Youn help I am an Apple user and do not know what the new emoji’s you’re using are. My curiosity can only be teased so much…

its just the new 🩵🩷 hearts i think?

at least theyre the only emojis not showing up on my pc but on my ipad and phone so i assume those are what u mean

[theetherealbloom]

BUT DADDY I LOVE HIM - CH.2

Chapter 2: ​​Just Screeching Tires And True Love

Summary: After harboring a crush on your dad's charming best friend, Joel Miller, you graduate college only to be confused by something he supposedly said to you, but then he and his daughter Sarah, reluctantly move away due to his work. Six months later, Joel returns to town, and you're desperate to confirm if his words were real. Both you and your dad eagerly await his arrival but for entirely different reasons. As feelings intensify, you realize that falling for him might not be temporary after all.

Paring: Dbf!Joel Miller x Fem!Reader

Warnings: Angst, AGE-GAP Romance, Reader is Early twenties and Joel is in his late 30s to early 40s, Secret Romance, Sneaking Around, FLUFF, LOTS OF SMUT, SMUT, SMUT, Heavy Make Out Session, Oral Fem Receiving, Kissing, Barely any plot, NOT A SLOW BURN AT ALL, Relationship, Swearing, Depression, Anxiety, Crying, Suggestive content, Flirting, Flattery, Awkward, Virgin reader, inexperienced reader, slightly Self Deprecating, Suggestive Content, Size Kink, Reader is “smaller” than Joel but no further descriptions, Breeding Kink, PWP (wrap it up), Body worship, declaring their love for each other, 

Word Count: 6.5k

A/N: Oh, wow. I didn’t expect all the love you all gave in the previous chapter. That was my first time writing real, raw, dirty smut. Like IM STILL SO NERVOUS AND SHY to post smut AHSKJFHAHAHA. The introvert in me is like… having a huge anxiety attack rn PLS– 

So, um, chat, I’m actually dyslexic and English isn’t my first language! So I apologize in advance for the spelling and/or grammatical errors. As always, reblogs, comments, and likes are always appreciated. Thank you and happy reading!

Song: But Daddy I Love Him by Taylor Swift

Previous Chapter → Next Chapter | Series Masterlist | Main Masterlist

Joel's skilled hands and tongue explore every inch of your body, knowing that a series of powerful orgasms is the key to preparing you for him.

His fingers and tongue trace a path of pleasure over your skin, and you can't help but respond to his touch. Despite your reservations, you find yourself quickly reaching a boiling point, your body trembling with need.

Joel's touch is like a dream come true, his hands and mouth staking his claim on what's his. He takes his time undressing you, savoring every moment of this intimate moment.

As you lay back, your legs wrapped around his shoulders, Joel's tongue delves deep inside you, exploring every inch of your slick folds. His mouth moves over your clit with the same skill and passion as his lips on yours.

You try to whisper his name, to tell him something, anything, but every time he shifts his mouth to ask if you're okay, you can only shiver and gasp, your body trembling with pleasure.

Joel's touch is like a drug, and you find yourself quickly becoming addicted to the feeling of his hands and mouth on your body. You lose yourself in the moment, surrendering to the pleasure that only Joel can bring you.

Joel can't help but feel the overwhelming urge to bury himself deep inside you, to feel your slick heat surrounding him.

His balls are heavy and tight, his cock twitching against his jeans as he fights the urge to climax.

But despite his own desire, Joel remains focused on your pleasure, his tongue exploring every inch of your body as you shudder and moan beneath him.

You are a vision of beauty, your skin flushed and glowing with the aftermath of your climax.

Joel's own need is intense, but he holds back, wanting to make sure you're fully satisfied before he takes his own pleasure.

"I need you, darlin'," he groans, his body pressed against yours as he fumbles with his zipper.

But when you speak up, he stops, his body tensing with anticipation.

"What is it?" he pants, his heart racing as he tries to hold back his own climax.

You look worried, and Joel can't help but feel a pang of concern.

"This is what you want?" he asks, his voice low and gentle.

You nod, but there's still a hint of worry in your eyes.

"Buttercup, what is it?" he presses, his concern growing.

But when you tell him, his heart swells with emotion.

"I've never been with anyone before, Joel," you say, your voice barely above a whisper.

Joel feels a surge of protectiveness and love, knowing that he's the first person to ever touch you in this way.

Joel's heart swells with emotion as you confess your virginity. He pulls you close, kissing your forehead as he whispers reassurances.

"No, I don't mind, darlin'," Joel reassures you, his voice filled with tenderness and desire. "It means you'll be mine, and I'll be your first."

You still look uncertain, but the hunger in your eyes tells Joel everything he needs to know.

His cock strains against his jeans, eager to be freed, aching to be inside you. Joel smiles, a mix of pride and desire filling him as he sees your attraction to him.

"We can go as fast or slow as you want, darlin'," he whispers, his hands finding your hips as he settles back between your legs.

But you have other plans. Your arms pull him close, your voice a breathless plea, "Yes, yes please, now."

Joel's heart races as he finds his zipper and frees his cock, the tip swollen and eager, ready for you.

"You sure?" he asks, his hands trembling with anticipation as you nod, your desire written all over your face.

With a swift movement, Joel sheds his flannel, revealing his soft yet toned body, his full erection standing proud and ready for you.

"Oh, fuck, Joel," you murmur, your eyes widening at the sight of him, the intensity of the moment hitting you.

As you both revel in the anticipation of what's to come, a distant rumble breaks the moment - a truck, your father's truck, parked outside.

Panic sets in as you realize the situation, the urgency of the moment propelling you both into a frenzy of dressing, the need for secrecy driving you to move quickly.

In a rush of movement, you both scramble to get dressed, the interruption leaving you both breathless and on edge, the promise of what was about to happen hanging in the air.

You hear the heavy steps of your father approaching the porch, the sound echoing through the house before the bell rings. Joel watches you quickly compose yourself, smoothing down your hair and adjusting your clothes, trying to appear composed despite the heated moment you both shared.

You move to Joel's kitchen, pretending to search through his pantry, your heart racing with the intensity of the situation.

Joel doesn't rush to answer the door, but your father is already there, a bag in hand, when he does.

"Joel, you okay, buddy?" Your father's voice fills the room, and Joel responds with a casual tone, "Yeah, yeah. Your daughter is in the kitchen helping me unpack some stuff. Come on in."

The air is thick with tension as your father enters, unaware of the charged atmosphere between you and Joel. You exchange a quick glance, a silent understanding passing between you as you both navigate hiding your shared secret.

"Hey, Dad, how was work?" You ask, trying to keep your tone casual and light.

Your father hands Joel one of his bags, his eyes flicking between the two of you, a hint of suspicion in his gaze.

"Anything interesting happen today?" You ask, trying to keep the conversation flowing.

Your father shrugs, his eyes still on you and Joel. "Just the usual," he says, his tone nonchalant, but his gaze lingering on the two of you.

"Well, I came over to check in… and tell you two that we should start prepping dinner soon," he says, breaking the tension. "Sweetie, why don't you help set up the table while I take over and help Joel finish up over here?"

"Yeah, sure thing, Dad," you say and your father smiles and you give one more glance over at him and Joel before leaving.

As you close the front door of Joel’s home and step off the porch, you take a deep breath and sigh, your heart racing with the fear of being caught.

You quietly position yourself near the edge of the house, just out of sight, listening in on the conversation between Joel and your father.

You feel your body flooded with anxiety, knowing that you need to make sure your father doesn't discover your secret with Joel.

You don't want him to find out or jump to conclusions before you and Joel have had a chance to define your relationship.

As you listen, you can hear the regret in your father's voice, and although Joel's tone is clear, your father's is softer, more subdued.

You can feel the weight of unspoken tension in the air, a heaviness that hangs between your father and Joel.

"It's fine, man, it really is," Joel reassures your dad, his voice calm and steady, a stark contrast to the unease that lingers.

Your father's repeated apologies have left you puzzled, his behavior out of character and leaving you wondering what's truly bothering him.

"So, what's eatin’ you?" Joel's voice cuts through the silence, his tone firm yet compassionate. "It's like you have a bug up my ass since I got here. C'mon, out with it," he urges, his directness surprising you.

As you listen in on the conversation, you can't help but feel a mix of emotions. You're concerned for your dad, who seems to be struggling with feelings of jealousy and insecurity.

"I dunno, Joel. It's just seeing you this time around, hearing how well you've done. And with my own business not doing as well… Fuck, man. Can ya blame a guy for wondering where he went wrong?" your father admits.

Joel responds with kindness and understanding, offering to help your father financially if he needs it.

"I told you, name the amount or just say the word. I'll cut you a check right now," Joel says, his voice steady and reassuring.

You get the sense that they had a lengthy conversation at the home office earlier, and Joel had seen firsthand the state of your father's business.

Despite your own worries, you can't help but feel a sense of pride in Joel's unwavering support for your father, even in the face of his own success.

"I don't want your charity, Joel," your dad says, his voice heavy with frustration. "I want...I guess I want the past twenty years back so I could do it differently. Do it better for my daughter. You know?"

Your heart aches for your dad, for all that he's done for you, putting family first even when it's just the two of you. It's what gets him out of bed every morning.

"I understand," Joel replies, his voice soothing. "But you've done your best, and now it's time for me to do mine. Movin’ back here isn't just about hangin’ out. I'm here to support you, whether you like it or not. So quit being stubborn and let me help."

Your dad goes quiet, and you realize that you've been eavesdropping for too long. You start to move away, not wanting to intrude on their conversation, but you hear your dad say something that stops you in your tracks.

"Joel, all those years ago. After her mom left and I had nothin'. We had nothin'. Remember who set me up in that little auto shop?"

Your interest is piqued. Anything to do with the past is interesting to you because your dad absolutely refuses to ever talk about it.

"It was you, Joel, all of it, and you know it. Hell, even Tommy helped us. If it wasn't for you and him, all the hard work you put in, paying off that damned loan, my daughter and I wouldn't be where we are today. And there's no way she would've gone to college."

Your dad's voice breaks off, full of emotion. And you hear Joel shifting his weight across the room.

"C'mon, we've been through this a million times. That damn loan was to get both of us started, remember? And we always said whoever paid it back first would never owe the other a fuckin’ penny. Remember?"

As you listen to your dad and Joel's conversation, you can't help but feel a mix of emotions. You're happy to learn about the support and friendship that exists between them, but you're also surprised that you're only hearing about it now.

"I remember," your dad groans, and you realize that it's time for you to leave them to have a private conversation.

As you make your way home, you can't help but wonder about Joel's past and the ways in which he's helped your family over the years. You're grateful for his generosity, but you're also a little shocked that you're only hearing about it now.

A night of many firsts for you, it seems. But your first time with Joel is obviously going to have to wait.

As you walk away, you can't help but feel a sense of anticipation. You know that Joel wants to tell your dad about your relationship, and you can see why. They used to share everything, including start-up money.

You guess that Joel wants what you want too - to have your dad as a part of the family for all of you.

But the shock of it all might cost more than you think, especially if your dad is as stubborn about you being with Joel as he is with everything else.

For now, you can only wait and see how things unfold, hoping what you have with Joel will be strong enough to weather any storm that comes your way.

"So, sweetie, did you have fun over at Joel’s?" Your dad asks, his innocent question sending a jolt of panic through you.

You choke on your food, feeling Joel's eyes on you from across the table. You quickly take a sip of water, trying to compose yourself. "Sorry... just... I... that went down the wrong pipe. Um, yeah, it was fun, a bit tiring though, kinda like a whole workout," you manage to say, your voice slightly shaky.

Unbeknownst to your dad, Joel shoots you a knowing wink, his smirk sending a thrill through you. You focus on your plate, trying to avoid any more embarrassing slip-ups.

As you try to eat, your mind races with thoughts of Joel. The simple act of 'being neighbors' suddenly feels like an impossible task. You can't shake the desire you feel for him, the hunger for his touch burning hot within you.

There's an obvious tension around the table, an aura of unspoken desire. You know there's no way you can make it through dinner without giving in to the overwhelming attraction you feel for Joel. It would take a miracle to resist the pull between you.

Thankfully, the universe seemed to be on your side as Joel's phone suddenly rang, interrupting the tension at the table.

"Sorry... gotta take this. It's Sarah," Joel said, his voice sheepish as he excused himself from the table.

You couldn't help but perk up at the mention of Sarah's name, smiling as you said, "Tell her hi for me please."

Joel easily slid his chair out and moved into the living room to answer his phone, his low voice a comforting presence as he greeted Sarah.

Your dad's suspicious gaze lingered on you for a moment, but you stayed quiet, focusing on your food. The anxiety bubbling up inside of you was making you dizzy, but you tried your best to push it aside and enjoy the meal.

As Joel talked on the phone, you couldn't help but feel a sense of relief. The interruption had given you a moment to collect yourself and regain your composure.

But even as you ate, your mind was still consumed with thoughts of Joel. The desire you felt for him was overwhelming, and you knew that it was only a matter of time before you gave in to the temptation.

Joel returns to the dining area, still on the phone, and hands it to you with a dramatic grumble. "Sarah wants to talk to you."

Your eyebrows shoot up in happy surprise, and you take the phone, excitedly greeting Sarah. "Hi Sarah! Miss you loads, I'm so excited you're moving back here."

Sarah squeals with delight, "You'll be there to pick me up from the airport tomorrow afternoon, right? With my dad?"

"Mhm! I'll be there, Joel is borrowing my car in the meantime." You assure her, smiling as you hear her excitement. "See you then!"

You say your goodbyes and hand the phone back to Joel, who resumes his call and says goodbye to Sarah.

As you head back into the dining area, you notice your dad has been busy on his phone, looking through his emails.

The tension from earlier has dissipated, replaced with a sense of excitement for Sarah's return.

But even as you chat with your dad, your mind is still consumed with thoughts of Joel. The desire you feel for him is overwhelming, and you can't help but steal glances at him throughout the meal.

As dinner winds down, Joel stands up, exchanging a hug and a pat on the back with your dad before turning to you. He pulls you into a warm embrace, his arms wrapping around you in a tight squeeze.

The electricity between you is palpable, the air thick with anticipation. You can't help but feel a rush of excitement as you look into Joel's eyes, knowing that the night is far from over.

With a lingering touch and a whispered promise, Joel leaves you with a sense of longing and desire, eager to see what the rest of the evening holds for the two of you.

Your dad checks in on you before he retires to his room, a habit from when you were a child. But tonight, your mind is elsewhere, consumed with thoughts of Joel.

As you lie in bed, your heart races, and your body aches for his touch. You know that sleep is impossible until you're in his arms.

After what feels like hours of tossing and turning, you decide to take matters into your own hands. Quietly, you slip out of bed, grabbing your phone, putting on your shoes and a sweater over your sleep shirt and shorts.

You listen at your dad's door, hearing the deep rhythm of his snoring, signaling that he's fast asleep.

With a sense of determination, you make your way to the back of the house and slip out the door, making your way up to Joel's porch.

If you were unsure about rushing into things a few hours ago, a sleepless night and the lingering ache between your legs are enough to convince you that you don't just want it - you need it.

The anticipation builds with every step, your heart pounding in your chest as you approach his door. You take a deep breath, ready to see where the night will take you.

Before you have the chance to knock, the door swings open, revealing Joel in nothing but grey sweatpants, his broad shoulders, soft belly and toned chest on full display.

Your breath hitches in your throat as you take in the sight of him, your body responding instantly to his presence.

"Well, hello there, darlin’" Joel says, his voice low and seductive. "Was wonderin’ when you'd show up.”

Without a word, you step forward, closing the distance between you and Joel. Your hands reach up to touch his bare chest, feeling the warmth of his skin beneath your fingertips.

"I need you," you whisper, your voice filled with desire.

Joel's eyes darken with lust, and he pulls you closer, his lips crashing down on yours in a passionate kiss. The sound of the front door slamming shut and him locking it echoes through the room as he doesn't remove his mouth from yours.

As you lose yourself in the moment, you know that tonight is the beginning of something new and exciting - a chance to escape the mundane and embrace the passion that burns between you and Joel.

Even though you're still a little tender from your earlier encounter, you're confident that you can handle him. You think. Maybe not all of him, but at least half of what you saw earlier.

The anticipation builds as Joel's hands explore your body, his touch setting your skin on fire. You whimper, your voice cracking and your body even buckling as he pulls you closer to him.

Your whole body is exploding with arousal, flushing through you all the way to where you need him most.

Your hands claw at his chest, and feeling his heart pounding hard against it, followed by the unmistakable feeling of his stiff erection probing you, you know you’re on the same page.

"I wanted it to be special," Joel says, almost sounding disappointed.

"It will be special," you counter, daringly running the flat of your palm up the front of his jeans, making him groan in a low tone.

"I meant somewhere special… not here," he reasons.

"I don't care where we do it, Joel. Bent over your couch, against the wall, on the kitchen counter - I just need you inside me," you gasp, your breath hitching with desire.

His strong arms effortlessly lift you off your feet in one swift motion, his muscles flexing as he carries you towards the bedroom.

"Then it's the bedroom," he growls, his voice low and commanding, as he strides purposefully up the stairs, his gaze locked on yours.

In this moment, you couldn't care less if anyone caught a glimpse of the two of you. All that matters is the raw desire pulsing between you and Joel.

The world fades away as you enter the bedroom, the air thick with anticipation and need. You know that this is where you belong, in Joel's arms, giving yourself completely to him.

If not for the interruption earlier, this morning would have been the moment you surrendered to him. But now, there are no more barriers, no more distractions.

It's just you and Joel Miller, enveloped in a whirlwind of passion and desire.

Joel might have envisioned a five-star hotel suite or a secluded cottage by the lake as more romantic settings. But you're right. Anywhere that's just the two of you alone will be special.

Your first time, or both of your first times, is something to be cherished. But what truly matters is the connection between you and Joel, not the location.

Seeing you standing there in nothing but the shortest sleep shorts and a sweater, Joel can't wait a moment longer. The urgency to be with you, to share this intimate moment, is overwhelming. He discards both of your clothing somewhere between the frenzy of kisses and tongue. The hours it would take to create the perfect setting elsewhere pale in comparison to the raw desire pulsing between you both.

In the bedroom that Joel wishes to be both of yours, he can't help but get a shiver. This is it, the moment you've both been waiting for. Joel, with the woman of his dreams. You, with a man who has more to offer than just his own needs.

It has to be right now. Joel needs to lay you down and fill your sweet cunt with his seed. There's an urgency between you both, like you've both got an appointment with destiny that neither of you can miss.

"We won't be interrupted this time," you whisper knowingly, and if last night's anything to go by, you both know you want more than just an hour of each other.

Joel's hands tremble as he holds himself over you, your heaving breaths swirling in the even hotter places between your bodies. Your mouths lock in deep, penetrating kisses, Joel's chest butted up against yours, both your hearts pounding out a beat that somehow he knows is gonna make another kid. This time with you. And God help him, he's gonna do right by you.

"I've waited for this… dreamed of you for so long," Joel rasps, feeling you sliding his swallowed tip over the entrance to your slick valley. Your quivering, tight cunt is pressing and rubbing against his cock, making both of your eyes open wider. Joel feels you tense up just a little, but he makes sure it's you who guides his hardness for now.

"I've waited too. I still can't believe this is actually happening," you purr, your thighs and wide hips perfectly matching Joel's own size. And he knows you're gonna need all the padding you can get once he starts fucking you like he senses you want it.

Joel's lips crash onto yours once more, your tongues dancing together as your bodies become one. You can feel him entering you, filling you up in a way that takes your breath away.

"It's so big," you gasp, your voice trembling with pleasure.

"Go as slow or as fast as you want, darlin'," Joel murmurs, his voice strained with desire. He watches your face, your expressions of pleasure and discomfort as he slowly enters you.

"Oh, fuck, Joel," you moan, your voice deep and loud. Joel can't help but join in, his own moans mingling with yours as he slides deeper into you.

Inch by inch, he fills you up, your bodies moving together in a rhythm that feels both new and familiar. You can feel every inch of him, the sensation both overwhelming and exhilarating.

There's a moment of discomfort, a jolt that makes you wince, but it passes quickly, replaced by a feeling of fullness that takes your breath away.

You can feel the heat building between you and Joel, the intensity of your connection growing stronger with each passing moment. Your bodies move together in a rhythm that feels both primal and instinctual, a dance as old as time itself.

"You feel so fuckin' good, sweetheart," Joel groans, his voice low and husky with desire.

You can only respond by gripping his cock from the inside, shifting your hips higher as your mouth forms an 'O' shape. Your eyes are pinched shut for a moment, lost in the overwhelming sensation of Joel filling you up completely.

But when you open them again, you're met with Joel's gaze, his eyes dark with desire and need. You can see the tension in his muscles, the way his biceps bulge as he grips your hips.

You both want this, crave this connection that goes beyond words. You want to share your first climax together, to create something beautiful and new between you.

And if you're lucky, maybe he’ll even put a baby in your belly.

You grip hold of Joel's forearms, your smaller hands doing their best to clutch them as he watches your breasts start to bounce with each long and firm stroke in and out of your tight wet pussy.

You're lost in the moment, your body moving in perfect harmony with Joel's as he thrusts into you again and again. You can feel every inch of him, filling you up in a way that makes you feel complete.

"Give it to me, Joel," you cry out, your voice hoarse with desire. You hook your ankles around his back, urging him to fuck you as hard and fast as he likes.

Joel doesn't hold back, his hips pistoning as he drives himself deeper into you. You can feel every thrust, the sensation bordering on painful but in the best way possible.

Your G-spot is a prime target at this angle, and once you get a taste of how good it feels, you're hooked. You like it hard, deep, and fast just as much as you like it soft and slow.

The bed underneath you both creaks and groans with the force of your frantic pumping and rocking. Any concerns you both might have had about making noise are long gone. It's a wild, primal sound, and Joel's grunts and growls are matched by yours with every movement of your entangled bodies.

His grip shifts from your hips to that ass of yours, kneading your soft cheeks with his fingers as he pulls you harder towards him. The slick warmth of your essence mixes with his own precome, the combination creating a friction that's both intense and overwhelming.

Joel is proud of how much you can take of him. His balls are rising with his pending climax, the tightness and warmth of your sweet pussy working its magic.

You both know this isn't a race or a test of endurance. Joel knows your prized pussy is his, and your body is his. But it's your climax that he's craving.

To see your face as he fills you with his seed.

And the new life he has ready to put inside you is as eager to make that dream come true for either of you.

Your body stiffens suddenly, and then trembles all over. You arch the small of your back, grunting words that have Joel swelling so much inside of you that he knows that you're both close.

Your eyes roll back, and you force quick breaths through your mouth. Joel's jaw is clenched and tight.

The growl from him is growing by the second as he feels his release rising.

"C'mon, baby, fuck, I'm gonna come… gonna come… tell me where darlin, fuck," Joel practically shouts, and you whimper, "Inside… inside me, Joel, fuck a baby into me."

Your gasping screams as you try to call his name fill his ears, rushing with the torrent of his pulse when he feels his own climax start to escape him.

The shudder of your hips against his and Joel's hands holding you so tight against him makes it feel like you're finally one.

Joel has never come so hard in his life, and he's never felt what he feels for you with anyone or anything. And unlike your climax when he used his mouth, this is a proper full-body orgasm for you. And for him too.

Your bodies are slick with sweat, your skin hot and flushed with desire. You're both breathing heavily, your chests rising and falling in unison.

Joel collapses onto you, his body spent and sated, his chest rising and falling with each heavy breath. The room is filled with the sound of your combined heartbeats, a symphony of desire and satisfaction.

As you lie there, entwined with Joel, you can feel the powerful energy coursing through both of your bodies, a potent connection that leaves you both breathless and wanting more.

The waves of your shared climax begin to ebb, but the intensity of the moment lingers in the air, wrapping you both in a cocoon of pleasure and intimacy.

"Holy shit," you gasp, still shuddering from the force of your release. You can feel Joel's member continuing to flex and pulse inside you, a reminder of the raw passion that brought you both to this moment.

It's more than just an orgasm. It's a transcendent experience, a merging of souls that leaves you both feeling bound together in a way that words can't quite capture.

As you catch your breath, you look into Joel's eyes, seeing a depth of emotion and connection that takes your breath away. In this moment, you know that you've found something special, something rare and beautiful that goes beyond mere physical pleasure.

Joel's smile is warm and genuine as he looks down at you, his body still intimately connected to yours. "Darlin’, you're mine now, if you'll have me," he says, his voice filled with emotion.

You can feel the aftershocks of your climax still pulsing through your body, the sensation of Joel's stiffness still flexing inside of you a constant reminder of the pleasure you've just shared.

Joel eases himself onto his side, sensing how much you want him to stay inside you. He wraps his arms around you, pulling you close as you both lay spent, your bodies still entwined in a tangle of limbs.

Your panting breaths mingle in the air, your smiles of near disbelief that anything so incredible could even be possible.

"Of course, Joel, I...," you begin to giggle, gasping in a quick breath as you feel his stiffness still flexing inside of you.

Joel props himself up on one elbow, caressing your cheek as he finally slides out of you. "I don't know how I know, but I just know. Do you feel it too, darlin’?" he asks, his voice filled with a sense of wonder.

You can feel your whole body relaxing, the tension and excitement of your climax slowly ebbing away. "Oh, I think I'm gonna feel it for a few days," you joke, your eyes widening in amazement.

Joel's smile is warm and genuine as he looks down at you, his eyes filled with love and adoration. "I love you," he blurts out, his voice filled with emotion. "I've never been good at this, with words… but fuck it, I love you, darlin'."

You make a small sound, a soft gasp that turns into a frown as your eyes mist up. You clutch your arms around his neck, as if your life depended on it, pulling him closer to you.

"I love you too," you whisper, your voice filled with emotion. "I love you so much, Joel."

In this moment, as you lay there in each other's arms, you know that you've found something special, something rare and beautiful that goes beyond mere physical pleasure. You've found a love that is raw, real, and passionate, a love that will last a lifetime.

Joel's fingers trace gentle patterns on your skin, his touch sending shivers down your spine. "I want to make love to you again and again, darlin'," he murmurs, his voice husky with desire.

You smile up at him, your eyes shining with love. "I want that too, Joel," you whisper. "I want to feel you inside me, filling me up with your love."

Joel's lips crash down on yours, his tongue exploring your mouth with a hunger that takes your breath away. You respond eagerly, your bodies moving together in a dance as old as time itself.

As Joel enters you again, you can feel the connection between you deepening, growing stronger with each thrust. This is more than just sex, more than just physical pleasure. This is love, pure and simple, a love that will last a lifetime.

"I love you, darlin'," Joel murmurs, his voice filled with emotion.

"I love you too, Joel," you whisper, your voice filled with the same love and adoration.

And as you lose yourself in the moment, you know that this is where you belong, in Joel's arms, surrounded by his love and affection. This is where you'll stay, for the rest of your life.

Having a man like Joel Miller relieve you of your virginity is one thing, but having him tell you that he loves you is something else entirely. It completes you, fills in the missing pieces of your soul that you didn't even know were there.

It changes you, transforms you into a better version of yourself. And it changes everything between you both for the better.

There are no more questions, no more wondering what if, no more chasing. Just the two of you, and you both feel it as strong as the climax he just gave you.

As the world slowly comes back into focus, you become silently aware of just how quiet everything is. The old house, the neighborhood outside, it all feels like something you've both left behind already.

Your bodies are still entwined, your limbs tangled together as if trying to become one. You can feel Joel's heart beating against your chest, his breath hot and heavy against your neck.

Having Joel Miller come back to town feels like a dream come true, and not just because of the mind-blowing sex you just had. It feels like he's here for you, to keep you, to lift you up and carry you off to the new life you both have waiting for you.

Neither of you says anything for a long time, content to bask in the afterglow and the moonlight of the night. You can feel the connection between you growing stronger, a bond that goes beyond mere physical pleasure.

As you lay there, completely sated and relaxed, you can't help but feel like you're exactly where you're meant to be. And it's in that moment of pure bliss that Joel's deep voice breaks the silence.

"Darlin'," he murmurs, his voice low and husky.

You jump a little, startled out of your peaceful reverie. But as you turn to look at him, you see the warmth and love in his eyes, and you know that this is no dream.

"Can I get you anythin'? You want somethin'?" Joel's voice, tinged with his Southern drawl, is like music to your ears as he gazes at you with a look that feels like it's etched into your memory forever.

"I think you just gave me what I needed, cowboy," you reply, a playful glint in your eyes as you exhale a long breath, feeling the lingering effects of your passionate encounter with him.

"I may never walk straight again, but I'm good," you assure him, snuggling close as he gently wraps one of his strong arms around you, pulling you into his warmth.

After a moment of blissful silence, a realization hits you, and you let out a low groan. There are things you need to attend to after such intense intimacy.

You quickly kiss Joel, mumbling about needing to freshen up and use the bathroom, waddling slightly as you make your way. Once you're done, you eagerly return to his embrace, seeking the comfort and closeness only he can provide.

"What is it?" Joel's voice is filled with concern as he notices the slight shift in your demeanor.

Your life before the sun rises is still out there, waiting for you both. Responsibilities and realities loom on the horizon, but in this moment, all you want is to be held by Joel, to feel his presence anchoring you in a world that suddenly feels uncertain.

He takes a slow breath, his arms enveloping you in a protective embrace, offering you solace and reassurance. Both of you are acutely aware of the depth of your connection, of the emotions that have been stirred between you, and the inevitable challenges that lie ahead.

As you lay entwined with Joel, the weight of the future pressing in, you find comfort in the strength of his arms, in the love and understanding that flows between you. In this moment, you know that no matter what comes next, you have each other, and that is enough to face the aftermath of it all.

[tmntxthings]

YOU 🫵 *points directly at that mean y/n, you, and that anon that asked for ansgt against rottmnt Raph* how very dare you !!!!!!

(If you have time and if your asks are open (didn’t see any warnings that it was close)) can you PLEASE do something fluffy and that reader is ABSOLUTELY head of hells for raphie? I’m talking flowers, I’m talking spending hours on a claw machine to get a plushie he wants it, I’m talking admiring and tracing his features slowly with the most stupid and hopeless in love expression the turtles have ever seen, im talking speaking up for him against anyone that mistreats him, doing his fav dishes, preparing balanced meals, paintings, little love notes, lipstick marks, poems under moonlight, I want devotion!!!! I want that sweet Puppy love !!!!! EVERYTHING. 100% a simp and isn’t afraid to show it, until Raph returns their actions, then they get bashful/blushing up a storm lol

thank you and have a good day

∑一Wherever You Go・゜・。

author’s notes: ain’t no way I’m doing that whole list we’ll be here forever, BUT don’t worry I’ll make sure he feels the love nonetheless

warnings: fluff, tooth-rotting fluff, bordering on a crack fic that’s purely just to show a character love ^ twas asked of me, unedited

Song: Never Getting Rid of Me by Christopher Fitzgerald

—————————————————————————

It was no secret that you adored Raph. And it didn’t bother you one bit that everyone, big red turtle included, knew that you had heart eyes for him.

Your love language for him couldn’t be restricted to just one kind. You exhibited all kinds of love for him. You hoped it wasn’t overwhelming. It was hard to stop yourself once you had an idea though.

One time you saw a beautiful bouquet of red roses. Instantly you had them in your hand, and a receipt in the other. They reminded you of his bandana. So bright, eye-catching! And down to the lair you went, shooting off an incoming text to Raph to give him a last-minute notice.

Earlier occasions where you hadn’t sent a text left you waiting around at a manhole cover forever. If Raph was asleep it would be hard to rouse him with just a notification. He’d need a full on blare horn. Or worst case scenario the boys weren’t even at the lair! Thankfully, most of the time they were home. Raph buzzed back with a text saying he’d be right up to open the cover for you. Sewer covers were heavy!

When the round slab of stone was lifted you offered up the bouquet to the darkness below instantly. It was quiet for a moment, before Raph emerged, cheeks tinted a darker green. “For me?” He questioned, his tone held a quality as if it was unbelievable for him to receive flowers.

But you didn’t chide him for it. In fact you only smiled warmly and nodded your confirmation. “I thought of you the moment I saw them. What do you think? Aren’t they pretty?”

His hands finally went out, accepting your gift. Holding them gingerly and away from his plastron. He seemed to not want any of the petals to snag on his sharp edges. “Raph loves ‘em” he murmured, his eyes entranced by the blossoms now that he could get a closer look.

This moment right here was picture worthy! You wished you had Donnie’s ability to just record everything, that way you could screenshot this later. Maybe put it as your screensaver. Instead you just watched, hands clasped as you waited for Raph to come out of his stupor. Which he did, and started asking you about your favorite flowers and invited you down to the lair.

~

You don’t know how they got the arcade machines down there. But it sure as hell beat going to Chuck-E-Cheese! Nothing against the place but it costs so much and all the games down at the lair are rigged to play for free! Which was awesome because you had finally decided, you weren’t leaving the claw machine until you won Raph’s dream plushie.

The poor turtle had played this game constantly ever since they mysteriously got the machine. He was able to get two plushies but they weren’t the ones he really wanted. The ultimate prize was a brown teddy bear with a little red bow tie. He was absolutely adorable. And Raph’s obsession with winning his prize was even more endearing. So when Raph texted you a picture of his defeated expression against the glass of the claw machine, you had to take matters into your own hands.

Raphie 😍❤️😚🤗🥰 - [ <image> 🥺 it’s hopeless ]

Y/n - [ omw asap, don’t worry raphie i’ll get you teddy! ❤️💪 ]

Well, easier said than done is a term of phrase for a reason. You banged your head against the glass or you tried to at least. But Raph’s calloused palm was in front of the glass before your forehead could make contact. Still you drew back to bang it against his rough skin anyway. He knew your frustrations, the claw machine was merciless. You had been at the lair for well over two hours. The first thirty minutes in had been fine. You had chatted with Raph easily, confident that eventually you would get the hang of the mechanism.

But then an hour went by. And then another. Your concentration on the game had dried up the easy conversation between you and big red. The atmosphere was intense as if the two of you were in battle together. Currently you were both defeated. His other hand patted your back, knowing exactly how you felt. “It’s okay, maybe Teddy isn’t meant to join my pile of plushies.”

You took in a deep breath. Stopping your frustrated head thumps and turned to look Raph in the eyes. “You’re right, Teddy is meant to sleep right next to you! And I’m gonna make that happen!” You harrumphed as you turned back to the evil machine. It was your enemy. It was working against you. All you wanted to do was this one thing and make Raph happy! This time for sure, you thought to yourself as you hovered the claw over to where Teddy lay amongst the other plushies.

“Like a boss!!!” You yelled as you smacked the button that lowered the claw. Both of you watched anxiously as it dropped, its metal fingers enclosing around Teddy’s brown fur, and it started to rise. But you had been here before and didn’t dare to celebrate pre-maturely before the damn stuffed animal was in Raph’s arms. The grip the machine had on the animal was shaky at best. The claw swayed from side to side as it carried the plushie over to the drop box. You were sweating bullets and could smell Raph’s anxiety stink.

But before the claw reached its final destination, the plushie tumbled out of its hold. You turned to Raph who let out a breath he had been holding. You expected to see disappointment in his eyes but it was quite the opposite. He looked happy as his snaggle-tooth dug into his lower lip. “Nice try,” his eyes crinkled shut with his smile. “Wanna go play DDR?” You sighed, letting the claw machine have the win for now. Happy to see Raph’s eyes light up with a burning passion as he raced over to his favorite spot, the left side, for DDR. “Ready to face the master??” He goaded but it was pure excitement to play one of his favorites of all time. “So ready!” You laughed, hopping up on the dance pad to get absolutely demolished because you didn’t have any rhythm. But you played regardless because when Raph was having fun so were you.

And yes, later that night you did bribe Donnie with twenty bucks to replace that damned claw with one that would actually work. So next time you were able to win Teddy and present Raph with the ultimate present. It costed you another twenty to keep Donnie’s mouth shut about ever having any involvement so you could have all the credit and look like a hero in Raph’s starry eyes. He sent you pictures of him and the stuffed animal almost every night with his goodnight message.

Raphie 😍❤️😚🤗🥰 - [ <image> Teddy says goodnight! ]

Y/n - [ gnight teddy, and goodnight raph-a-la 🤗 sweet dreams ]

~

“What did you say?!” Your voice raised as you stepped into the lair’s common room. Shelldon had just so kindly lifted the manhole cover, since no one else from the group chat was responding! You thought it weird since usually someone was on their phone *cough* Donnie *cough* but sometimes they were busy! Which you understood. Until you had seen Shelldon’s worried pixelated expression as he urged you on down the sewer system to the abandoned subway station.

That was when you heard it. Heated arguing. It was hard to listen to especially when it was Leo and Raph. You knew how much all of them loved one another, a love that even harsh words couldn’t damage. But sometimes, things were said in the heat of the moment that weren’t meant to argue a point. They were said to hurt the other person. That’s where you drew the line. That’s where you felt the need to step in, even if you weren’t family.

“Leo, if you’d just try, even a little, at accepting the role as a leader. It’s not that bad-“

“If it’s not that bad then why don’t you just take it back huh?”

“You know why. Dad said you-“

“Dad said this! Dad says that! What are you his little pet? Since when do we do whatever Dad says?!”

“Leo, c’mon,”

“Raph if you don’t wanna be the leader anymore. Then fine. But don’t push it on to me.”

“I never said that, Dad thinks-“

“For someone who’s catchphrase is ‘boss’ you really like being someone’s little bit—“

And that’s when you stepped into the room. Eyes hardened as you marched in between the two turtles. “What did you just say?!” You dared Leo to repeat. But as he studied your stance and the way you got in front of Raph, as if protecting him from Leo, the blue turtle started to duck his head into his shell. Feeling remorseful for getting so heated. He made a ‘tsk’ noise before heading off to his room. Mumbling sorries as he passed by.

You turned to Raph to check the damage. It seemed like just the two of you now. You wondered if they had started fighting because Mikey and Donnie weren’t around. Raph was rubbing the side of his head, looking drained and it tugged on your heart strings to see him that way. You knew brothers argued, sure they even fought sometimes. But it was hard to see them go at it like this.

“I know you’re not okay, so I won’t ask. But just know Leo didn’t mean any of that. I know he didn’t.”

Raph gives you a weak smile in return. Like he doesn’t believe you. But doesn’t have the heart to say it aloud. So you go to him, grabbing his hands and pulling him towards the couch. He goes without resistance. Once seated, you turn to him and he turns to you. Your hands go up and you cup his face now that he is within your reach.

“He’s scared. Just like you are. I know it’s hard to tell right now when he’s saying anything but that. But you know Leo, he’ll spew just about any nonsense to not say how he truly feels.”

The words turn over in Raph’s head as he thinks. He sighs, softening in your hold as he nods. He looks a little better now. But you don’t let him go. You trace the contours of his face. Lovingly. Letting the tension in the room ebb out until the early argument has left both of your minds completely.

“It’ll be okay. I know it will.”

You murmur. Your hands finally letting go as Raph’s breathing deepens. He fell asleep to your touch. Leaned back into the couch as his snores start up. You scoot over until your head can rest on his arm, pulling up your phone to text Leo to get his ass over here. A portal silently opens up on the other side of you and as Leo sits next to you, you pull him closer with your arm.

“Dummy.”

You chide the blue turtle as tears fall down his green cheeks. He huffs at the insult but knows you mean well. When you leave the lair that night the two brothers are tangled together in a pile that will surely be four later on, alls forgiven.

~

Raph eats just about anything. His stomach knows no limits. So you could char the meat on accident and he’d still wolf it down like it was the best meal he ever had. While that was kind of him, you wanted to really impress his palate. So on the topic of food one late night text session, you asked of his favorites. To which a long list was sent over. So you had to ask him again.

Y/n - [ Okay, that’s really cool that you have so many. But which one is your favorite among the favorites? 👀 ]

Raphie 😍❤️😚🤗🥰 - [ that’s a hard one… uhmmmmm ]

With a lot of encouragement he managed to get the favorite list down to five choices. To which you just decided to hell with it, you’ll have a feast! It took a lot of preparation. And more time than you thought you’d ever spend in your kitchen. But five meals were cooked and prepared perfectly on your round table. Now, you wished you’d told Raph of your plan sooner and hoped to the moon above that he didn’t have plans tonight.

Y/n - [ >image< hungry? C: ]

Raphie 😍❤️😚🤗🥰 [ 😱 always! headin ur way ]

Raphie 😍❤️😚🤗🥰 [ hereeeeeeee open ur windowwwww ]

And yes somehow he fit. He was good at wiggling around. He cleared each and every plate once you had tapped out after trying to keep up with him. Food comas hit the both of you soon after as he got up and claimed he would do the dishes. He was so cute as he wobbled up sleepily from the kitchen chair. Arms full of plates and platters as well as cups for not only water but various sodas/juices had been served that you knew to be Raph’s favorites as well. When he had asked what the occasion was you didn’t have any in mind.

“I just wanted to!”

You chirped. Happy to feed him. Happy to have made his day. Now he was as careful as one giant turtle could be with your plates, but to his dismay the bottom one from the pile ended up breaking due to the clatter when he placed them in the sink. He wouldn’t know it until he was practically done with cleaning, feeling so good about himself for not breaking any of the— oh there it was. The last one. In pieces.

“Raph is so so sorry! You made a nice meal only for Raph to break your plate!”

No matter how much he wished he could fuse the remains back together, he’d need glue. And you apparently didn’t have any in your apartment. He sighed to which you hushed all his worries away.

“Raphie! It’s just one plate, I’ve got more! Plenty more as you can see!”

You, who had been drying the dishes he washed. Gestured with the damp towel towards the pile of neatly stacked plates that were all dry. The force of which you whipped the towel was more than you had intended and you both watched as that perfect stack fell over, onto the counter and off on to the floor.

“Well. I may need to go buy some more.”

You admitted sheepishly. Raph didn’t know whether to be upset for you or laugh at the ridiculousness of the whole situation.

“Yeah, let’s go get some now!”

After picking up and sweeping to make sure all the shattered pieces were in the trash. That’s exactly what the two of you did. It was little things that Raph did, like worry needlessly over you accidentally cutting yourself with one of the broken plate pieces. Or him getting shy at every compliment and gift you had to offer him. His humble nature. How he readily takes on responsibilities. His love for his family. His diligence when it comes to crime fighting and working out. His carefree side. You loved it all. You told him all the things that enamored you to him. And the two of you were happiest, when you could just spend time together like this. Doing little things.

—————————————————————————

[merrygoesaround]

THE POPPY WAR AS TAYLOR SWIFT LYRICS

rin-nezha: “cause i loved you, i swear i loved you. till my dying day. i didn’t have it in myself to go with grace, and you’re the hero flying around saving face. and if im dead to you why are you at the wake? cursing my name, wishing i stayed.” “and you can aim for my heart go for blood, but you would still miss me in your bones.” “YOU HAD TO KILL ME BUT IT KILLED YOU JUST THE SAME.”

my tears ricochet

rin-nezha: “i vowed not to fight anymore, if we survived the great war.” “it turned into something bigger. somewhere in the haze, got a sense i’ve been betrayed.”

the great war

rin-kitay: “if im on fire, you’ll be made of ashes too.”

my tears ricochet

rin-kitay(sinegard days): “but i can see us lost in the memory, august slipped away into a moment of time. cause it was never mine.” “back when i was living for the hope of it all, for the hopeee of it all.”

august

rin-kitay(sinegard days): “and i know it’s long gone and there was nothing else i could do.” “cause there we are again in the middle of the night. we’re dancing round’ the kitchen in the refrigerator lights. down the stairs, i was there. i remember it all too well.”

all too well

rin-venka: “cause all of my enemies started out friends. help me hold onto you.”

the archer

venka: “and they tell you that you’re lucky but you’re so confused, cause you don’t feel pretty. you just feel used.”

the lucky one

venka: “they told me all of my cages were mental, so i got wasted like all my potential. and my words shoot to kill when im mad. i have a lot of regrets about that.”

this is me trying

rin-jiang: “don’t call me kid, don’t call me baby. look at this idiotic fool that you made me. you’ve taught me a secret language i can’t speak with anyone else.”

illicit affairs

rin: “time wont fly it’s like im paralyzed by it. i’d like to be my old self again but im still trying to find it.”

all too well

rin: “please, i’ve been on my knees, change the prophecy.”

the prophecy

rin: “whose afraid of little old me? i was tame, i was gentle, til the circus life made me mean. don’t you worry folks, we took out all her teeth.”

whose afraid of little old me

altan: “you wouldn’t last an hour in the asylum where they raised me.”

whose afraid of little old me

rin-kesegi: “and though i can’t recall your face, i’ve still got love for you.”

seven

rin-altan: “and isn’t it just so pretty to think, all along there was some invisible string… tying you to me.”

invisible string

rin,kitay,nezha-the trifecta: “i think i’ve seen this film before, and i didn’t like the ending.”

exile

[smilesatdawnmain]

For all the monkey children, what are some headcannons you have for them as siblings? Things like favorite sibling, rivalries, any 'middle child' syndrome, etc.

Im personally most curious about Qi Haoyu and Qi Bao as the oldest and youngest

Oh my GOSH I just want to gush about this cute little Monkey Family! To the point I was writing a lot. So I am going to do it in sections. This first part will be just about Haoyu to start, and then I'll post each sibling separately to highlight other connections. You'll still get a lot of good insight about all of them through this :D 

—-

Haoyu: 

Rivalries are non-existent. Perhaps because he is the oldest, he doesn’t feel this with any of his siblings. Though outsiders like to gossip and theorize that MK and him are rivals to be Wukong’s “true successor”, in truth, both never view it that way. Haoyu is tall, so his siblings often climb on him like a tree to see further away, or just to talk to him. Haoyu doesn’t smile often. Or show much emotion, a very stoic monkey. His Siblings know how to make him laugh. He has the most expectations on his back as the first born, often heavily compared to Wukong. Many try to gain favor from him due to this, and he struggles to tell the difference from honest intentions to dishonest ones. 

MK and Haoyu often train late into the night together, taking the training the most seriously out of all the siblings. Whatever MK doesn't understand from his training with his Baba and Dad, it is Haoyu that can often make it clear. When MK is stressed about their “Destiny” it is Haoyu who can assure his worries, being someone the world looks at in a similar fashion. While MK is nervous to reveal his worries to everyone else, because he doesn’t wish to worry them, he does confide in Haoyu and Xiaohua the most. 

Xiaohua and Haoyu both love to seek out new land. While Xiaohua is more in for the views and new people, he is eager to help Haoyu’s treasure hunting obsession, as Xiaohua also likes shiny things. It is thanks to Haoyu that his parents let him go on adventures even before he is an adult, so long as he doesn’t leave his big brother’s side. Both are similarly naive to marketplace “Deals”, but Xiaohua at least can tell when demons and celestias try to trick his big brother into “helping” them. Haoyu does hit anyone who calls Xiaohua “Little Flower”. 

You would often find Sying clinging to Haoyu’s back when they were younger as whenever she got upset, she would go to him and rant about her feelings. He was a good listener and continued to train even as she clung to his back. You will sometimes still see her do this. She goes to Haoyu for advice on relationships, and other issues. Helps Sying with her training as he is literally a wall. So she practices the swing of her fan by trying to move an immovable object- her brother. When discovering her laser eyes, she accidentally gave Haoyu a not so flattering haircut and singed his fur for a while. 

Haoyu knows of Savage’s secret girlfriend and keeps this knowledge to himself. Haoyu once left home to explore and was 3 days away before he realize Savage and Rumble had hid in the shadows below his feet. Not long after turning around, Wukong realizes what must have happened and met with Haoyu half way. There is a reason Rumble and Savage were born as they are but have never been told why by their parents. Haoyu knows the reason why, but has never told his parents he knows this knowledge. Haoyu like to play board games the most with Savage as his little brother makes him laugh the most. 

While Haoyu can speak some words and is not completely deaf, he often only speaks to Rumble through sign language. These two often like to meditate together in complete silence, enjoying the peace. If Haoyu were to admit he has a favorite, it would be a heavy tie between Rumble and Savage, as these two tend to be the ones to make him laugh the most. Rumble often shares many of his interests. When Rumble and Savage were little, you would find the two sneaking out of their beds to have sleepovers with many of their siblings- Haoyu being the most common sibling to find the two in his bed the following morning. Out of all their siblings, Rumble hides the most in Haoyu’s shadow. 

Haoyu is often dragged around by Xue to go shopping and carry her bags for her. She likes to design clothes, so due to Haoyu’s ability to stand perfectly still for long periods of time, he is her mannequin. She discusses politics with him, though it is mostly her doing the talking and Haoyu nodding quietly. He doesn’t speak fondly of politics, but he at least understands them unlike the rest of their siblings. Haoyu’s nails are often new shades of color and cutely designed because of Xue. She makes all of his outfits, and the rest of her siblings. Haoyu gets pouty sometimes because Xue is very good at tricking him. 

It was extremely difficult for Haoyu to properly bond with Bao, but not because of their age gape. It was due to Haoyu often using sign to speak, and Bao being unable to read sign due to being blind. They found a system to resolve this. Haoyu has a small hand drum that his Baba used to use to calm him down when he was little and overwhelmed. It’s a noise he can hear clearly and likes. He keeps this drum on his hip when home, so Bao can always hear when he is approaching/so that Haoyu doesn’t accidentally startle Bao. Haoyu also use his index finger to write on Bao’s palms to talk. Rumble does a similar thing for Bao. Haoyu is protective of Bao, but often shows this quietly, by removing foes or obstacle to Bao long before Bao even realizes they are there. When Bao was an infant, if their parents had to leave at the same time, Haoyu was entrusted to hold, feed, and change Bao. 

(I’m debating between gold and blue eyes. Blue because of… certain reasons. So for now, his eyes are blue. This may change)

All siblings

(Next sibling) - MK

[gimmethosedaddymilkers]

The Secrets One Keeps

Alrighty, This is a request I was sent by an anon! Asking for a reader who's Hosea's daughter but dating Arthur, they have to keep their relationship a secret, especially from Hosea. Afraid for the poor man's heart.

Keep in mind this is my first work since coming back from hiatus, I'm a little rusty, so it might not be as great as it could be, be patient with me as I try to get back into the Rythm of things please! There's some NSFW themes but it's not full on smut, not for my first one back, but never fear, that will make a return.

Warnings: Fluff, language, maybe some NSFW themes Reader is a bit younger than Arthur is. (Don't worry Im not a freak, reader is gonna be over 18 by like at LEAST six years) Female reader, if there's slip ups, please let me know so I can correct them!

Let's jump into it!

You swear to God you just saw him, You just did, you watched him come out this way and you watched him give you that...look.

He wanted you to follow him, you could SEE it.

So where the hell was he?

"Arthur?"

You call out, but you keep your voice low. It's late, and camp isn't too far, you don't want anyone to hear you...you know what the two of you agreed on, and it was better if no one knew about the two of you. Especially your father. Hosea would NOT take kindly to Arthur dating his 24 year old daughter.

Not only that but to Hosea...Arthur was like a son...he saw the two of you as though you were siblings.

You definitely did NOT feel that way.

"Arthur, I swear to whatever God you pray to you better fuckin' come out-"

"Aw now, c'mon Darlin' that ain't very nice of you to speak like that."

You practically hear the smirk on his face as you feel an arm wrap around your waist and a chin on your shoulder.

"'Sides, you know I ain't a religious man."

"Arthur Morgan, how many times do I have to tell you not to scare me-"

"Awww you love it."

"No I don't!"

"Bullshit you don't last time I did you laughed and tried to take my pants off-"

"Shut up."

You twist to face him and sure enough he's wearing that smirk of his.

"You like it."

"Alright! Fine."

He laughs and leans in, placing his lips gently against yours, softly, sweetly, so different from what he showed everyone else.

"Been wantin' to do that all damn day. I hate this sneakin' around crap," He scoffs. "Fuckin' stupid, we're both adults."

"Aw come on, it's not so bad Arthur...The sneaking around is kinda fun..."

"I guess so...I don't know, I'm gettin' real tired of not bein' able to kiss you goodbye, or havin' to hide behind the wagons just to tell ya I love ya. I shouldn't have to hide it like I'm embarrassed."

"I know..."

You give a sigh and lean into him.

"It sucks, I know it does, I know. The sneaking is fun, but...I know what you mean. We should be sharing a tent by now, instead of trying not to be caught."

He gives you a grunt in response, placing his chin on your head.

"How can we be sure that Hosea wouldn't approve of us?"

His voice comes out a little strained. Acting as though he didn't already know the answer.

"C'mon Arthur..."

You sigh again and move so you can look him in the eye properly.

"You know he won't. Hell, he sees us slightly too close to one another and he loses his mind, he stares you down. You know it, you see it."

"I know..."

He grumbles.

"I need to spend more time with you though Darlin' I do. I NEED to."

He pauses for a moment

"We have to at least take a trip together soon, I mean...either that or we just gotta stop carin' about what Hosea thinks. Don't get me wrong I love 'em, I do, but I love you more."

"I love you too..."

The two of you are silent for a few moments, comfortably leaning against one another in the darkened part of the woods, it's late, both of you know that, and both of you know that you should probably be getting to sleep.

But it's been a long day. A long week even, the two of you haven't had nearly as much time together as you would have liked.

"You think maybe I could sneak you into my tent?"

Arthur's voice breaks the silence, quietly, barely there.

"Jus' tonight, please?"

"Arthur, you know dad'll see us."

"No, look I can leave tomorrow before you, leave the flaps down, no one'll go in there, then you just gotta go out towards the side instead of the front, go around the back of the wagon."

You chuckle a little at his enthusiasm, he never fails to make you smile. He's so obviously, deeply in love with you that it's hard to say no to him.

"Alright....alright, okay, we'll try. He should be asleep by now, it's just the others we have to worry about."

"They ain't gonna say anythin'."

You look at him and give a confused look, though your smile never wavers.

"How do you know?"

"They won't cause if they do, it's me they have to deal with, not Hosea."

His voice lowers slightly, and you watch as that look comes over his eyes. You've seen it before, you know what it means.

"Jesus Arthur, would you quit that, you..."

Your face heats quickly and you look away from him. Of course he was attempting to be threatening, but to you, it just seemed...attractive more so than threatening.

He knew that.

"Why Sweetheart...somethin' gettin' into that head of yours?"

"Shut it, you know what it does-"

"Absolutely I do, why you think I'm doin' it?"

He laughs but leans in and kisses your temple before starts to lead you back towards camp.

"C'mon, let's sneak you in."

He ushers you forwards, and the two of you stop at the edge of camp to see who's up, but luckily it seems that mostly everyone is sleeping.

He then leads you around the edge of Clemmons Point until the both of you get to his tent, the moment the both of you are in he closes the flaps up and gives the two of you some privacy. It seemed like the two of you had gotten away with it. Or at least no one had called out to you.

In the dim light of his lantern the two of you share a smile and there's a look in his eyes that you know means you'll be playing the quiet game tonight.

.....

Morning seems to come faster than you would have liked it to, the time spent with Arthur never seemed to be enough, so when you wake up in the early morning you decide to just burrow further into his bare chest.

It earns a quiet grumble from him as he pulls you closer to him, he's awake, you can tell he is, but he stays silent. The only way you know he's awake is the fact that his hand can't stay away from your ass.

"Didn't you have enough last night?"

You mumble but there's a smile on your face as you adjust, throwing a leg over his hip.

"Ain't never 'nough with you."

It comes out as a grumble and he moves to your thigh, gripping it tightly as he pulls it even further over his hip.

He buries his head in your neck and kisses there. As much as he seems to try and rile you up the kiss is soft, more sweet than anything.

"C'mon Darlin'...this could be every mornin'..."

He yawns and shifts himself, trying to wake up a little more.

"We gotta tell him at some point anyhow..."

"I know..."

You huff and move your hand to his hair, gently massaging his scalp, it's nearly instinct.

"I just...I don't know what he'll think, what he'll do...."

"C'mon, it's me. I know it probably ain't what he wants but...He loves me, he knows me...you could be screwin' Bill behind doors."

He stops a moment.

"Shut up Arthur, it is not-"

"I dunno about that, seems kinda dumb to me."

You roll your eyes and laugh before you kiss the top of his head. You're about to open your mouth to try and come up with an idea on what to tell your father when the tent flap opens.

You and Arthur move simultaneously to look and see who's standing there only to have your eyes go wide.

You're leaning backwards, your head turned over your shoulder to look, and you suddenly wish that you could disappear.

Hosea stands at the opening of the tent, his mouth open as though he'd gone to say something and then he'd noticed.

"Hosea, I can explain-"

Arthur starts, he moves, and gently puts his hand on your back to push you towards the wall so that you can stay covered.

"I don't want to hear it!"

Hosea puts his hand out, as though he's trying to block it all from view.

"Get dressed! Both of you!"

He leaves, dropping the tent flap and leaving the two of you alone.

"Shit..."

"Shit's fuckin' right..."

Arthur sighs and plops back down on the cot, covering his eyes with one hand.

The two of you take a moment, sitting in silence. wondering what the hell you'd say.

This silence continues as the two of you go to dress, once the two of you are done Arthur reaches for your hand, taking it quietly as both of you leave the tent.

Hosea stands right outside, and the both of you give one another a look of shame.

"What the HELL do you think you're doing!?"

Hosea nearly yells, it's such a difference from his usual calm demeanor, you've rarely seen your father so mad.

"Hosea, c'mon..."

Arthur mumbles.

"Can't we talk about this outside of camp?"

Hosea takes a deep breath and then nods, and the three of you begin your trudge towards the edge of camp. It's there that Hosea stands with his arms crossed waiting.

"Explain yourselves."

"Hosea-"

"No, Y/N, you first."

"Dad..."

You swallow and look to Arthur and then to Hosea.

"I love him. I mean that. I love him, and I have for a very long time, and he loves me. I know he does. It's not just...it's not just a one time thing, it means something-"

"How long."

"About a year."

A silence falls over the three of you. Hosea's face seems unreadable.

His eyes close and he gives a deep breath, exhaling heavily.

"Arthur."

Hosea opens his eyes and looks towards him, his jaw clenched.

"If anything happens to them, emotional or otherwise, I'm going to hold you accountable, and you WILL NOT like me. You understand me?"

"I do Hosea, you know me. I'm not gonna let anything happen to them. Never."

Hosea doesn't seem exactly...pleased with this answer, but he seems to accpet it.

"Don't EVER let me catch you two like that again."

"You didn't knock-"

"Shut up Arthur."

Arthur clamps his jaw shut and swallows, but there's a look a defiance in his eyes.

Hosea looks at the two of you for a moment longer and then walks away without another word.

The two of you, now alone, look at each other and give a relieved sigh.

"I guess...I mean he knows now at least."

"I have a feeling he's gonna make your life a living hell for a while Arthur-"

"Yeah..."

He breathes.

"More than likely."

[secret-spirit]

Take your Alex to work day

Bringing the Angel of Silence

_

Alex felt the feeling of water underneath them, but they weren't sinking. They saw lights in the corner of their vision, purple, blue and yellow lights glowing at the side amongst the black void wall.

They looked up and saw a ceiling light shaped like a crescent illuminating an orange light, where were they?

Alex sat up, the floor having the weird illusion of water as it mimicked the sounds of moving around in water, yet the floor was solid. They stood up and looked around, a narrow but spacious hall decked in desks and cabinets, on the wall were floating doors color coded and have designs they didn't recognize, they all had a shine to them, and whispers can be heard behind them. In the end of the hallway was a couch with a sketchbook and a mess of art supplies scattered around.

Alex noticed all the doors had some shine to them except for one with the text reading above saying "Hollow Dreams". The other doors had text above but they were blurred out.

The room shook a little, making Alex stumble off balance. Three eyes then appeared in each side of the walls. Blue on the left, Yellow on the right, and an asymmetrical light purple eye at the end of the hall above the couch.

Alex felt their other eyes blink open in response, the second layer of wings spreading open in defense.

The eyes all blinked at the same time at them, before they all closed. Alex looked around cautiously, before bubbles began immerging from the water floor.

A silhouette covered in black water immerged, it was fully covered in some kind of black water but had dark colors flowing around it. It then began to form into a person, lilac moth antennas appeared on their head, they had short black hair with braids but they had a ponytail that denied gravity and flowed like water, the black water sinking down their head to form a face, having lilac glasses. They wore a dark blue long sleeve jacket and had lilac leggings, they also wore a necklace that looked like an eye.

Alex briefly saw blue moth wings and a tail on them before it faded. They didn't look like a veldigun, they were more human except for the moth antennas.

They opened their eyes, and looked directly at Alex, the veldigun stood their ground defensively, seeing how they tower over the stranger.

The stranger stood up from the floor.

Then they began to sign with their hands.

'Im not gonna hurt you' They signed.

Alex dropped their guard a little, they then signed back.

'Where am i?'

The stranger stepped closer, but Alex stepped back, not trusting them.

'In my hall, don't worry there isn't any danger around here' The moth signed as a soft smile went across their features.

'Where is Clyde?' Alex asked.

'Your friend is safe and sound, they are back at Simons barn' The moth signed.

Alex grew suspicious. 'How do you know about Simons barn? Are you with the foundation?'

The moth made a gross sound. 'If i were I'd be dead immediately'

'What is your name?' Alex asked.

"Call me Secret" Secret said.

Alex stiffed from the sudden change from signing to speaking.

Secret noticed the way they flinched.

"Sorry about that, sometimes i don't feel like talking and use sign language instead, only for a brief few seconds or minutes though" They explained as they stepped closer.

'Did you bring me here?' They signed.

Secret nodded. "Yeah, I'll send you back though so don't worry about a thing" they reassured.

'Why did you bring me here?' Alex signed out.

"Some of my mutuals suggested we should bring our veldigun Alexs to the office, i just went along with it" Secret replied.

'Theres...more of me? Did you create me?' Alex asked disbelief.

"This version of you yeah, sorry i had to take away your voice but it made sense for your story" Secret said.

Alex felt the world began to spin as they reflected on their life. Their life was just a story written by this kid, maybe even more people beyond their control having written their life in different ways? Everything they went through, everything they had done. Was being written by someone.

They felt their lower wing(hair) being tugged at as the lower pair of eyes looked at the one bothering it.

"Hey, sorry but it's no time to think about having an existential dread, c'mon I'm already late to the office" Secret called out.

Alex flinched at the touch. "Secret you-"

"-shouldnt touch you because veldigun symptoms" Secret finished their sentence before letting go of their wing. "Don't worry I'm not affected by it in terms of the story I've written about myself" they chuckled.

"Hey I'm a creator but I'm my own character, irony am i right?" Secret said. Alex did not get it.

"Come on Alex" Secret said as they walked up to a door at the other end of the hallway, the text above reading 'Sitcom AU' in big bold letters that dripped.

Secret twisted the doorknob and opened the door.

"Welcome to the office, Angel of Silence"

[octaviasdread]

I hereby conduct this tortured poets society album meeting in all of its mania and sorrowful blues as I move from unhinged impressions to unhinged first-listen analysis because I am incapable of saying less.

(and to all the Aimees i’m so sorry but that’s on Kim)

This Anthology is taking me so long to process, but nothing feels like the first jarring moments of I Can Do It With a Broken Heart - the cacophony and flashes of a birthday breakdown bopping to 80s arcade game synth. It's crumbled cake and mascara streaks when Bejewelled is actually a delusional Mirrorball,

and The Secret Garden reference in I Hate It Here, oh god, she’s so me:

I hate it here so I will go to / secret gardens in my mind / people need a key to get to / the only one is mine / i read about it in a book when I was a precocious child

I need to come back to that. But the whirlwind of Who’s Afraid of Little Old Me? Plans cancelled. IM THE ONE barricaded in the bathroom with a bottle of wine, actually. It's me chained-up in that poor things victorian mourning dress shrieking elegies in my tortured nightingale screams.

She's Grammys Taylor looking at the crowd of her peers rolling their eyes, she's the litany of snide jokes diminishing her success, and the children, sisters, friends, and girlfriends of those who wronged her loudly singing her songs.

so i leap from the gallows and i levitate down your street / crash the party like a record scratch as I scream / who’s afraid of little old me

i was tame i was gentle til the circus made me mean / don’t you worry folks we took out all her teeth

ohhh, the throwback to Speak Now and the significance of MEAN. The song and its titular word show how childish language encapsulates that pointless spite and the bone deep hurt mean behaviour breeds - but now she’s a phoenix risen, and they hurl her youth and her downfall back in her face - word for word, surprised face - its the dark side the The Lucky One, of not escaping the cage of fame games.

you lured me and you hurt me and you taught me / you caged me and then you called me crazy

i wanna snarl and show you just how disturbed this has made me / you wouldn’t last an hour in the asylum where they raised me / so all you kids can sneak into my house with all the cobwebs / i’m always drunk on my own tears isn’t that what they all said?

PUT NARCOTICS IN MY SONG took me out. This album is funny in the most sardonic and absurdly humorous ways,

like the classic cowboy western guitar strings in her crime songs (I Can Fix Him, No Really I Can - pistols drawn), but especially the ones leading into Fresh Out The Slammer. Fucking genius, and to follow on with static sounds at 2:26ish to the house where you still wait up, is exactly the kinda detail I adore.

Naively, I thought Florence was done with me after Florida!!! It's a lyrical meme for single 20 & 30 somethings who moved away from home,

my friends all smell of like weed or little babies / and the city reeks of driving myself crazy / little did you know your home’s really only / a town you’re just a guest in

and the haunting morphs from the ghost of your girlhood into the catalogue of decisions and delusions which get you through adulthood. Yet it feels almost like an interlude within the song when

me and my ghosts we’ve had a hell of a time / yes i’m haunted but i’m feeling fine / all my girls got their lace and their crimes / and your cheating husband disappeared/ well no one asks questions here

appears like an alternative pov for No Body, No Crime with the girls and their ghosts and their pacts made over wine. Every Action has an Equal Reaction. Run away to Florida, or Texas, and lose yourself to lose the heartbreak. Its self-destruction, it's trauma-healing, bonding, and its breaking.

(what a song for an angsty girl collab, problematic girl in hand with problematic girl, lyrically and thematically, maybe the real love story is the friends we make along the way.)

And that wasn't even the last of it. It's Florence 2.0 with B side Cassandra, but instead of Dance Fever, its Taylor’s glorious mythology with all the allusions, parallels, intertextual and lyrical ruining of my mind:

when the first stone’s thrown they’re screaming / when its burn the bitch they’re shrieking / when the truth comes out its quiet

so they killed cassandra first cus she feared the worst / and tried to tell the town / so they filled my cell with snakes i regret to say / do you believe me now?

No apologies anymore. A girl given the gift of prophecy by Apollo, the GOD OF POETRY, is cursed with her prophecy never being believed: Burning all the witches even if you aren't one, indeed. She saw the truth of the Trojan horse, and the Trojans insulted her. Rep snake branding and the current cultural view of KK and Ye. I don't need to say anything else.

i was in the tower weaving nightmares / twisting all my smiles into snarls

the family the pure greed the christian chrous line / bloods thick but nothing like a payroll / bet they never spared a prayer for my soul

I literally played that THREE times before I got over it enough to finish my first listen,

and i’m still thinking about Clara Bow and that Stevie Nicks tambourine we collectively freaked over from the Spotify installation, and all the silent movie speculation from the track title release.

you look like Clara Bow in this light - you look like Stevie Nicks in '75 - you look like Taylor Swift

Three women whose public profession became entangled with their pain. Silver Springs. Boyfriend songs. The jokes. Clara Bow.

Clara feared being left behind by 'talkies.' Miss Americana. The fear of 30 bringing death to a woman's Hollywood/Musical career,

beauty is a beast that roars down on all fours demanding more / only when your girlish glow flickers just so / do they let you know?

Three women who beat the odds - three women whose talent, craft, and popularity carried them through.

But there's something more to unpack here with cycles and patterns - of the past endlessly repeating. It's the transient nature of fame and our fleeting view of beauty mapped out in the untouchable, ever-changing, and culturally worshiped moon.

It's a body of physical craters, a natural body we call discovered, and fight to claim. We project emotions and create rituals of worship - you're the new god we're worshipping. Endless stories are told about her, but we can never fully see the moon with human eyes. Eclipses, shadows, - 'half moonshinе, a full eclipse' - half-truths and half-moons:

this town is fake but you're the real thing / breath of fresh air through smoke rings / take the glory, give everything / promise to be dazzling

There's a play on light and a play on words in the repetition of Dazzling, shining so bright so blindingly bright. Who is dazzled? Who is doing the dazzling? There's an instability between Director - Public - Star. It's Hollywood lights, No one in my small town thought I'd see the lights of Manhattan / No one in my small town thought I'd meet these suits in LA.

She beat the 'War Big Machine' - but for me, there's ambivalence and illusion on all sides of the final lyrics, you've got edge, she never did / the future's bright, dazzling.

(and ‘Edge’ is particularly ironic when you consider the songs on this album…)

Moving again into the B Side, it's Taylor's departure from Invisible string, red strings of fate, and golden threads à la the golden chain of fate in Charles Dickens, A Tale of Two Cities that strikes me.

First, I thought her writing was a complete departure from the themes of destiny and fate, but then, The Prophecy:

cards on thе table / Mine play out like fools in a fablе

it isn't an absent symbol; it transformed. It's the evermore forest amped to the max. Witches, folklore, fairy-tale and fable - a homeric epic. Its the hero's journey distilled as she opens the song with a move from 'full throttle' adventure, to slowing down 'Hand on the Throttle' to appeal for Supernatural aid at the hero's transformative fall.

and it was written / I got cursed like eve got bitten / a greater woman wouldn't beg / but I looked at the sky and said / please I've been on my knees / change the prophecy

Lover asking Traffic Lights becomes spending my last coin so someone will tell me, and this might be the most slept-on heartbreaking line. Her search for reassurance can't be framed as an arbitrary musing anymore. It can't be dismissed as a mere thought on her drive home, or something triggered throughout the day - its intent. It's a quest for answers, a plea, a last-ditch hope difficult to deny.

and I sound like an infant / feeling like the very last drops of an ink pen/ a greater woman stays cool/ but I howl like a wolf at the moon / and I look unstable /

gathered with a coven 'round a sorceress' table / a greater woman has faith But even statues crumble if they're made to wait / i'm so afraid I sealed my fate / no sign of soulmates

She's asking for a gift from the Gods, and when the God's won't answer, she plunges straight down from heaven or Olympus into the self seizure of power in witchcraft. And when it fails, she descends further - Spending my last coin so someone will tell me it'll be okay - paying mortal fortune tellers, even if they lie.

The song leans on figures without redemption, on the Eve's, on the women cursed and punished, and those who scream like infants rather than enduring burdens and pain in silence. She's poisoned, infected like Aurora from the wound of the pricked hand with dreams of him. Is this a punishment?

She's infected, cursed like Eve got bitten, [lyric of all time!!!!] but does a monster always do monstrous things? Who is the monster? Who is the folkloric, the literary Mad Woman? Perhaps she's written from the desperate, the scarred, and the wronged.

and the transition into another tale with Peter? As in Peter losing Wendy? Is it an epilogue to the Betty trilogy? or a different use of the metaphor?

and I didn't wanna hang around / we said it was just goodbye for now /said you were gonna grow up / then you were gonna come find me / words from the mouths of babes / promises oceans deep / but never to keep

The triangle is echoed in love's never lost when perspective is earned, reflecting the different povs of Betty, August, and James, and placing Peter as the new conclusion - the shelf life of those fantasies has expired / lost to the lost boys chapter of your life/ the woman who sits by the window/ has turned out the (porch?) light.

Promises wear out. Wendy's window closes, and so does this chapter in her life.

my lost fearless leader / in closets like cedar / preserved from when we were just kids / is it something I did? / the goddess of timing / once found us beguiling

is also - intentionally or not - Narnia coded. Is the storybook collecting dust in her closet? Or is the closet still holding a portal to another fairytale land accessible only in youth, another home you can't return to (and another folklore parallel with mtr, anywhere I want just not home).

Side B is so harmonious with ttpd being the end of a chapter as the anthology moves through all the seven stages (or Taylor playlists) of grief.

The Manuscript, the signing of the autopsy, is the Death of the Author. It's the Roland Barthes realisation of All Too Well reborn in joy and fan culture, the story isn't mine anymore, of the Eras - 'I hope you hear these songs and think of this night' - Tour. She knew what the agony had been for - art. connection. - and its these things that create the hope lost in ttpd's journey through mania, disorientation, loss and despair. It all leads to healing, nothing left but a manuscript.

So many thoughts from listen no.1 and they’ll probably change, but i’m so exhausted from this 31 song rollercoaster that I'm just gonna let this sit. death of the author, I guess.

[simpforchuchu]

Better half of me - Yosuke Todoroki x Oya!reader

a/n: Hi, it's been a long time :/ Im not sure this one cause while writing this i really was struggling so much :( It was better in my mind i guess. Anyways, here it is. I hope you like it xjdkkf

Sorry for the grammer or spelling mistakes.English is not my main language so...

Thank you and love you 🥰

Warnings: fight, injuries

Oya High School was noisy as usual. Everyone was discussing the fight that took place yesterday, quite cheerfully together.

There was a fight with one of the high schools in the vicinity and Oya was the winner. Fujio was happily talking about the most interesting incident of the fight.

Y/n was Oya's only female student. She wasn't as strong as the others, but she was always trying her best.

Usually in fights or in danger, her friends would protect her and watch over her. But in the last fight, y/n looked quite confident and strong.

"It's really good to see her getting stronger"

When Fujio said to y/n with a big smile, Shiba put his arm around Y/n's shoulder and laughed;

"I even saw that she was protecting Tsuji at one point. But he never admits it."

When everyone laughed, Tsuji also shook his head and laughed. 

Y/n was happy to see that her friends trusted her. She was trying very hard not to be a burden to them.

"I guess you don't have to worry about her every moment anymore."

Y/n knew the owner of this voice very well.While everyone was quite happy, Todoroki's cold and suggestive voice brought a deep silence.

There was a problem between Todoroki and Y/n that no one knew about.Neither of them would talk about it. In fact, everyone was aware of something. It was no secret that Y/n liked him but no one could understand why Todoroki was being so harsh and mean towards her.

Y/n broke the silence and slid forward under Shiba's arm and smiled.Fujio knew very well how hurt she was. Anyone there could see it when they looked into her eyes.

"Speak clearly what you mean, Todoroki."

When y/n asked, Todoroki got up from his seat and faced y/n.He was still with his usual cold stare.

"Everyone worries about you in every fight. I've told you many times not to come to fights, but you don't listen. One day someone will get hurt because of your stupidity."

"Oi Dorokki, shut up." 

Fujio shouted at Todoroki's harsh words.He knew the two of them were always nervous but he doesn't want to see how upset y/n was.

"Fujio... it's okay."  Fujio looked at her in surprise as Y/n smiled

"He's right, he's telling the truth. I'm not strong, you always have to protect me. But there's something I'm wondering about."  Y/n took a few steps closer to Todoroki "Why do you hate me so much Todoroki? I really don't understand. What's wrong? What could I have done to make you hate me so much?"

Everyone was aware of the hurt in Y/n's voice.  When Todoroki remained silent, y/n shook her head and quickly left the school.Tsuji and Shiba looked at Todoroki in disappointment for a moment and then followed y/n.

"You really are a bigger ass than me, Todoroki"

When Yasushi said angrily, Fujio looked at Todoroki

"Go apologize to her, Todoroki, what you did was really unnecessary."

Todoroki looked around for a while and left angrily.Sometimes he didn't understand why he did it either.He didn't hate Y/n, he loved her. He knew she loved him, but he had clearly closed the issue and hadn't told anyone.

Todoroki knew he had enemies, he knew that y/n was in danger.Although he repeatedly told her to drop out of school, she refused, and this was starting to worry Todoroki more and more each day.  He wanted her to be safe so much that he was willing to break her heart.

What he did was stupid, but he thought that if she hated him or could intimidate her, he would go to another school and she would never see him again.

But he was very wrong.

Y/n was offended by him, the pain in her heart was increasing day by day.Sometimes she really couldn't figure out what she had done to deserve so much hate. And instead of giving up, it only made her more ambitious.

***

Even two days after the incident, Todoroki was silent.This silence was reflected in his surroundings.Y/n, on the other hand, wa pretending the others as if it was okay, even if she wasn't talking to him.

When Y/n walked out of the grocery store after school, she didn't expect to see Todoroki. When she saw his walking briskly in the opposite direction of his house, she felt that he was doing something mysterious.

She secretly followed him for a while, when she walked into a garden of a school, she was sure that he was going to meet someone. She followed him silently and sneaked in after him when he entered the school gym.

Todoroki was arguing with someone, she was hiding behind the closet by the door, listening to them.  But someone noticed her and dragged her by the arm, bringing her near Todoroki.  Todoroki was looking at her in surprise, she didn't know who the person he was talking to was, but she was sure he wasn't his friend.

"You... Y/n what the hell are you doing here?"

Todoroki's voice sounded angry.Actually, he was just scared.

"I didn't expect you to bring your girlfriend to the fight, Todoroki-kun."

At the boy's words, Todoroki turned to him.He wasn't scared for himself, he had come here knowing it was a trap, but now y/n was with him.

"Todoroki... I..."

Y/n didn't know what to say.This time it was really her mistake, but  it's too late now.

Todoroki was looking at the boy in front of him.  What is gonna happen? Are they gonna fight?  Could he protect Y/n? Why does he look so confident ?

Just then, he realized that behind the leader, someone had cut a rope. When he looked up at the ceiling and saw the rope and wooden pallets above, he knew it was too late.He needed to think fast, he turned to her and quickly pulled her, collapsed onto y/n and they were both under the pallets now...

***

When Todoroki opened his eyes, he noticed the weight on him and the girl he was protecting under him. Even though he had protected Y/n from the pallets, he had fallen over her. It was quite difficult, but he tried to stand up and dropped the pallets on his back to the ground. He quickly got up and looked at y/n.

Her eyes were closed, her arm was bleeding, and she was unconscious.He was sure she had hit her head.

Todoroki felt his whole body aching.But he was so scared that he couldn't care. He gently shook her, and when she didn't wake up, he called the ambulance. He knew they both had to go to the hospital.

***

Both were in a good condition.They were kept in the hospital tonight for safety purposes only.In the morning, Tsukasa, Fujio, Tsuji and Shibaman had arrived at the hospital.After all of them checking out Todoroki first, all but Tsukasa left to check on y/n.

"You're lucky, you both survived with only minor injuries."

Todoroki nodded at Tsukasa's touch.He didn't know what to say

"Y/n... why was she with you?"

"I don't know! Damn I don't. I don't know how she found out, why she came, how I was so careless. I... I never wanted her to get hurt."

As Todoroki's voice trembled, Tsukasa sat next to him and patted his shoulder.

"Todoroki... You care about her too. I know that very well. Then why are you so cold towards her?"

Todoroki took a deep breath.

"I care about her. It's not like what she thought, I never hated her. I just wanted to protect her. I thought she'd be safe if she was away from me, if I hurt her, if i break her heart, if she dropped out of school..."

Tsukasa nodded and there was silence for a while. A few minutes later, the others joined them again.Tsuji spoke with an angry tone.

"Y/n looks good. I mean physically."

Everyone in the room understood Tsuji's hint.  Even though Tsuji and Shibaman were always there for Todoroki, they never liked the way he treated y/n. This time they both looked quite angry.

For a while no one spoke.Todoroki sighed and rested his head on the headboard.

"It's because of me. That's why I'm trying to keep her away. She's hurt because of me. It could have been worse. They could have targeted her. I care about her, damn i do. So I broke her heart even though she was hurt, i always did it for her safety."

For the first time, Todoroki was very clear about his feelings, so the others were a bit surprised as well.  But Tsukasa understood him from the very beginning.

Still, this stupid plan shouldn't have continued when Y/n was this upset and they both loved each other.

"Todoroki, talk to her. I'm serious. Tell her how you feel, what you think. You've hurt her enough."

Todoroki shook his head when Fujio said it seriously

"I can't, she'll be hurt more every time she's with me."

"Every time you make her cry, it will be worse. She will make more mistakes, she will suffer more. Don't you understand? She really loves you, she came there for you without even thinking."

For the first time, Tsukasa had raised his voice.  He knew what Todoroki was trying to do, but that wasn't the solution.They both needed to talk to each other properly

***

After a while, Todoroki left the room and went to y/n's room. When he looked through the window part of the door, he saw that she was crying with her knees pulled up to her and her head on her knees.

He had known y/n for a long time.She was quite emotional, but she didn't like it when someone saw her cry. She hated being weak.

And Todoroki had always told her that she was weak...

He slowly opened the door but y/n didn't notice. He approached the bed, stood there and thought for a few seconds.

When he did what he wanted to do, his body had acted independently.

Y/n was startled with fear when suddenly someone hugged her, but she immediately knew who it was. She was shocked, unable to react at all.She still didn't know what to do when Todoroki whispered quietly.

"I'm sorry. I'm sorry a thousand times Y/n. I never meant to make you cry."

Her body tensed even more as a sob escaped her lips involuntarily.Todoroki hugged her even tighter. Y/n spoke with a shaking voice

"Why ?"  Todoroki looked at her in surprise.  "I just want to know why... Why do you hate me? You know. You know very well. You know I love you. But is that a valid reason to hate?"

Todoroki was now realizing how much he had hurt her all this time. He wanted to kill himself when he noticed the sadness in her voice.

"Y/n... I don't hate you. I really don't. I..."

Todoroki didn't know how to finish his sentence.  When Y/n looked up at him, her red eyes and trembling lip had devastated Todoroki.

He lowered his head and tried to speak in a low voice.

"I am sorry."

Y/n looked at him confused this time

"I just wanted to protect you. I never intended to be a mean bastard towards you. I thought if I kept you away from me, if I upset you, you would get away from Oya and all this trouble... I was stupid y/n... sorry. I mean, really sorry."

Y/n knew it was the first time she had seen him like this.He is for the first time so sincere, so gentle. She knew he was telling the truth, and it made her want to cry even more.

Todoroki was aware that the young girl was staring at him without any reaction, it made him very nervous.

Y/n took a deep breath.She looked into the eyes of the young boy. She wanted to say something, but she didn't know what to say. Todoroki, on the other hand, was quite daring.Today he wanted to reveal everything.

"I wanted to keep you away from me because I didn't want you to get hurt like this. But it's too late now. I failed to protect you."

The young boy looked at her in surprise as Y/n extended her bandaged hand to Todoroki's.With warm fingers touching his cold ones, the young girl turned her eyes to him.

"I love you Todoroki, really i do. I know you don't feel the same way but-"

A sudden move, an unthinkable decision. A warm and sweet kiss.Todoroki has never been good with words.

Y/n was staring at him in surprise as the young boy slowly broke away from her.Todoroki smiled faintly and gently took the hand that touched his fingers and took it between both of his hands.

"Will you let me protect you while I'm with you? Can you forgive me despite everything i did?"

Y/n slowly nodded as Todoroki leaned towards him again.This time, y/n knew well what was going to happen, slowly closed her eyes and surrendered herself to the warm feeling of the boy she loved...

HnL taglist : @straysugzhpe @tiddly-winx @satraninalane

[evelyn-onfire]

IM NORMAL ABOUT SUSHI PACK SO HAVE SOME HEADCANONS!!!

Tako: (he/him, transmasc, gay ((and oblivious to it)) Has very conflicting feelings about Ikura (GAY) that he pretends aren't there. Tako is the second oldest and though he's the leader, he's extremely insecure and feels like he shouldn't be the leader. Does he talk about these feelings? Hell no! He bottles them up and uses his art as therapy. He can get pretty bossy to mask his feelings and retreats into his head when stressed out or under pressure. Has really bad anxiety and tends to get silent panic attacks. Also abandonment issues go brrr

Magura: (she/they, lesbian) The oldest and calmest of the group, acts has co-captain and older sibling to Tako. They're the friendliest with Low Tide as she often meditates with Toro and is secretly dating Mochi (only Kani knows). They've been blessed by the Great Tuna which causes their powers to get kinda wacky. Despite mostly being in tune with their inner tuna, she can sometimes snap. Still, she does well under pressure, which Tako is grateful for.

Kani: (she/her, pansexual demiromantic) Despite being the second youngest, she's kinda a jack of all trades. She's incredibly cleaver, can speak multiple languages, has the toughest skin and the sharpest claws and teeth. Despite being the hard-shelled grumpy one, she really does love her team and is extremely protective of them. Kani is lowkey clingy as hell and trills when she's happy. Her love language is physical touch.

Ikura: (he/him, bisexual) The "middle child" of the team and definitely acts like it. He surprisingly has a lot of secret admirers but any hints by anyone go right over his head. He's a chaotic dumbass and reckless as hell, which drives the team crazy because he often puts himself in danger. Secretly, Ikura thinks being reckless is all he's good at. He's also super clingy and follows around anyone he can. He and Kani spend a lot of time together.

Wasabi: (he/they/it) The chaotic youngest team member. The team found him alone one day and it didn't stop following them so they were all just like "guess this child is ours now". They mimic the mannerisms of the team and does a lot of vocal stimming. He thinks Ikura is SUPER cool (even though he's lowkey a loser) and sees Kani as his big sister. Wasabi doesn't like to be babied and though he worries the team, they are able to take care of themself...for the most part.

[isadollie]

hi hi!! could i please have a matchup for obey me ? u can call me rio, i go by she/he and im bisexual ^^ i dont mind being matched up with a guy or a girl (theres only one girl anyway,,) . i love love LOVE space, sleeping, sonic, hatsune miku, and pokemon. as for dislikes, i hate allergies, bugs, and the dark (my ass is TERRIFIED of the dark). i like playing games and watching movies in my free time, my favorite aesthetic would have to be cottagecore or something of the like. i have long, curly brown hair, blue-ish eyes, i wear glasses and im unfortunately 5'3. idk my mbti but my friends always tell me im funny and kinda unhinged. my dream birthday present would be a miku figurine (im broke n desperate some1 hmu prettu please,,,). id say my love language is physical touch and some of my current favorite songs are its a wonderful cat life, from the start, rabbit hole, and escape from the city !

thank youu !! :3 damn i wrote a whole paragraph 😭

— matchup —

if you'd want a matchup too, make sure to check out this! link

i match you with...

Belphegor!

★ okay so.. i can see it, okay? not just because you like sleeping- i mean that too BUT-

★ your love language is physical touch, and i think Belphie wouldn't mind it at all. in fact, he'd love to always be near you in one way or another; holding your hand under the table, leaning his head against your shoulder, rubbing your back. besides.. we all know that Belphie loves hugs

★ his favourite type of date would obviously be a napping date, let's be honest. but now he can't imagine falling asleep without holding you

★ when you first mention your interests to him, he says he loves the same things, but the second you're gone he rushes to Levi for explanation (Levi would love Miku, let's be honest here)

★ speaking of Levi, you two would sneak into his room when he's not around, cause who else has this big variety of video games/dvds?? it was meant to be a secret, but then you two fell asleep on the floor in his room and Leviathan caught you:)

★ i'm pretty sure he would take your glasses off a lot because "he wants to see your eyes better", or try your glasses on and asking if it suits him!

★ you said you're scared of the dark [i feel you on this one] and i think Belphie would make it his mission to make you comfortable. he doesn't mind turning on the lights for you, he will happily reassure and comfort you whenever you feel unsafe (even though he will complain a bit at first. but don't worry, he doesn't mean it)

★ honestly for some reason i feel like Belphie would hate bugs too, so if you see one in your room, he's the last person you'd want to call for help, he'd just run away and make you deal with it alone

★ he would threaten Levi to go buy that Miku figurine for you 😭

★ laying in the grass together and watching the stars at least once a month is a must!

hey, this is my first ever matchup, so i hope it's okay! when i read your request, my first thought was belphie! i also considered levi, but i think belphie fits more:3

thank you for requesting! have a nice day<3

[thequietkid-moonie]

I SAW YOU WRITE ABOUT ROMANTIC KILLER OMG !

Hi ! How are you ? My name is Miyo and i'mm good ! Hope you are too and if u wanna vent i'll be here !

May I request Hijiri hc ?

Hijiri with a s/o that don't like material things like Anzu, but that is very different from Anzu

Won't confront someone, cute asf, and blame him for the attention he got because they kinda are jealous that they have no one but loves him in secret

Cute and jealous S/O doesn't care for material things

[ HEADCANONS ] [ Hijiri Koganei ]

[ Romantic Killer ]

Hello Miyo!! Is nice to meet you, im having a hard time but slowly getting better, thanks for wanting to help ❤️

hmm I don't know if I get right the jealousy part, still I hope you like it. I enjoyed doing your request a lot, hope you loved it as much as I did

Hijiri is used to being surrounded by a lot of people, draging all the attention to him is something he is used to and still he doesn't really care for others much, so for you to catch his attention you have to have something special in his eyes, not caring for his fortune or the things he could get with it and just being interested on him as the person who he is is something that truly get his attention

Your cuteness is something Hijiri loves, is something he isn't used to and still he loves it (just when it come to you). He had never really been in love with someone so you being his first love is already dificult for him because he is used to be loved not being in love, being in love for the first time it already feels strange for him, but with someone who does care for material things and that is super cute makes things more difficult for him, he doesn't know how to act

He is used to win people by his looks and money, but the second one doesn't really works with you and your cuteness makes him nervous and almost lose his compose, how he is supoused to act all bossy and stoic like he normally is when he is totally distracted by your cuteness? He had never being too interested in cute things and still he can't help but stare at you with amusment

Still, it doesn't get much time before you two start dating and even when he knows that you aren't too interested in material things it doesn't stop him from buying you a lot of things, little gifts that goes from things related to your interest (that somehow he manage to remember) to things (like accessories y clothes, or other things) that he found and that could totally match your cute nature

Once you two start dating Hijiri will pay a lot of more attention to you and start to care a lot for you, even when he isn't obvious with it you will notice it by little actions he does, like actually remember important things about you (and tries to remember some of your interest too), what you like and what not to be able to spoil you correctly and, after a while, he will even start to learn to read your body language, it started by being amazed by your cuteness and sweetness but with time he learns to identify your expression, specially because you don't like to confront people

Speaking of it, Hijiri will call you idiot (in an affectionate way, somehow) and scold you for trying to avoid confrontation, he is probably being harsh with his words and even sounds annoyed but is just that Hijiri is worried about you, as much as he want it he can't be always there by your side to protect you if someone wants to take advantage of you because of this, and the only though of someone hurting you in any way or taking advantage of your passive and cute personality makes him mad, he had never truly love someone and thinking on you possibly getting hurt makes him get protective over you

Hijiri tries to motivate you to don't being scare to confront others and stand up for yourself, even saying that if there is something that you don't like of him or want you have to say it you have to tell him! (as much as he will hate it if it help you start to losing your fear he will endure it just for you)

Even if you don't tell him he will know at some point that you don't care much for all the gifts he gives you, even when you don't say it directly he can tell by your expresions, being hesitant or not as surprised as he expected, it troubles him but he won't stop and will just try to find other gifts that will give you the amazed reaction he wants, he won't stop until you ask him to (to help you speak your mind out and confront him too), even so he won't really stop giving you gifts and spoiling you, he will just slow down and not do it so often

Hijiri probably doesn't really get that you are being jealous over all the attention he get, he feels like he is being completely clear that he only has eyes for you for how much he had open up with you and how much he spoils you, even with how much attention he pays to you, still he won't really get it until you finally tell him that you are jealous (normally he just put you closer to him when he sees you nervous or troubled by something, thinking that maybe someone of the crowd is making you nervous)

Either way he will call you idiot for being jealous, are you jealous thinking that he may prefer someone else? Idiot, don't you see that he only has eyes for you?, or is because you feel like you aren't as cared and loved as he is, because you don't have so much people caring for you like him? Idiot, isn't his love and affection for you enough? Still, non of them really love him the way you do, they just love him for his name and position, and he doesn't care for them anyways

[falltothesun]

helloooo taking you up on that hook up advice offer !! especially since im also a trans guy & ive been considering grindr bcos i have been insanely needy the past week it's literally making it hard for me to function so yes!! please!!!!

Hi omg! So I definitely joined Grindr for the same reason, I needed to get dicked down so bad it was starting to affect my work lmfao. Huge disclaimer: this is all a bunch of stuff that works for me, from my experiences. There's no handbook, I'm figuring this out myself. If anyone wants to correct me/add on, please do.

First and foremost- don't settle. Grindr is a bit of a hellscape. In the moment it definitely seems like anyone willing to fulfill your needs is worth it. I'm speaking as a total sub/bottom so there were definitely guys on Grindr who 'spoke my language', offered what sounded like a good time, but didn't have my best interests at heart. You can't put much trust in any stranger on a hookup app, but here are some good indicators of things to watch out for and avoid:

- blank profiles/no pics. You're going to get a ton of them. Dick pics do not count. Make sure you have a good image of the person you're meeting. Make sure they're clean (both hygiene and std wise). Just- the more info you have on them, the better.

- being pushy. They're going to whine and whine about meeting up, and they are also going to say nasty things if you ignore them/turn them down. Do not let this guilt you. If this is how they receive boundaries over text- you can't trust them during a hookup. You don't owe anyone anything, not even a text back. A huge green flag is when you can have a no-pressure conversation, and sometimes even a pre-meetup to discuss boundaries and kinks.

Do not get stingy on your own boundaries! You are meant to enjoy this time, too. Tell them exactly what you want, your hard nos and hell yesses. Clear communication beforehand can lead to a fantastic night. Don't worry about blocking or turning down if you're getting bad vibes- there's literally dozens of guys waiting in your DMs, one of them has to be good.

Now, I have huge trust issues so bear with me here- you can't always count on your hookup, even if you found one that checks all the aforementioned boxes. So have some contingencies. Here are some of mine:

- two (or three) of my friends get a text as soon as I leave my house. Yes, it's awkward to mention to someone that you're about to fuck, but prior conversations have been had and usually I just say "I'm going out for x hours, call me if I don't get back to you by then". I send my location if possible (harder to do with carplay), and just like that, there are people waiting for my word. Hell, you can DM me your location and a timeframe and I will call the police in your area if I don't hear back from you.

- I never host. Is this controversial? I don't care. I'm a sub, bottom, afab, tiny human. I'm super susceptible to stalking and kidnapping (and not in the fun way), so I keep myself safe by making sure my hookups don't know where I live. I like to drive to their place, because then I have myself a getaway vehicle, or we meet in the middle somewhere. Regardless, my home is a secret and shall stay that way.

- don't bring anything valuable. Other than my phone and my wallet (which I sometimes just leave in my car), I bring nothing with me. This is less about personal safety and more about theft tho lol

-bring protection. Rawdogging is fun but STDs and pregnancy scares are not.

-this is Grindr specific but be careful with your photos. Grindr has a neat function called 'albums', and you can retract any sent albums at anytime so they can't be seen anymore. You also can't screenshot anything in the Grindr app. This protects you- to a point. But like anywhere else on the internet, be very, very careful with who you send your pics to.

Takes you by the shoulders. Listen to me. It is always okay to say no. You could be in someone's bed, naked, and you can say no. This sounds like common sense, but sometimes you're with a stranger in the moment and things aren't firing right in your brain, but your well-being is 100% a bigger priority than pleasing the guy you met on Grindr. They can bitch and moan all they want, but if you aren't feeling it, you aren't feeling it, and you don't owe sex to anyone. You can say no at any time. And anyone who fights you on it or disregards it is not someone you want to associate with.

Ok now that all the parental lecture-y stuff is out of the way- some general tips to show your hookup partner some respect! They're also in a place of vulnerability, so while it's good to be careful, it's also good to be gracious.

-protection. I said this already! But you can bring more than just a condom. Looking into PrEP, getting yourself tested(!!!!) after every encounter, and not having sex when you're sick is generally good etiquette. Getting tested is not only being a decent human for your hookup partner, but it's important to do for yourself as well. Idk what country you live in and what the healthcare is like so hopefully it's as easy as walking in to a clinic like it is here. Post-sec institutes (colleges/universities) usually have fantastic sexual health programs as well so I'd check there if you're in that demographic!

- clean up. Please. Shower, brush your teeth, put on some deodorant and a clean change of clothes. It goes a long way! My best hookups have been with a guy who smelled good, and I enjoyed it as much as I did the actual pounding in his backseat. Also clean up after the hookup! Shower, pee, etc. Hygiene. (I'm a germaphobe ok)

- boundaries! You've set yours, now stick to theirs. I've slept with guys who really didn't like blowjobs- so I didn't give any, we kept it junk to junk. I might've been the sub in the situation, but that doesn't mean the guy dominating was a sex machine who liked everything, so I accommodated that! Sometimes it's as simple as listening to the sounds they're making, reading the body language, and acting accordingly. If they aren't being enthusiastic about what's happening, then maybe it's time to check in.

- text back. Hey man, if it was a good fuck, it was a good fuck. NSA is usually my style, but there's nothing wrong with hooking up again with the same mf if it was a damn good time. Give 'em some feedback, tell them you had a fantastic night, ask about doing it again. Everyone needs the confidence boost.

Goddamn this got long. I hope some of this helps, I hope I didn't miss anything, and I hope I didn't say something that sounds completely fucking bananas. Good luck and hope you have some good, safe hookups!!

[microwavedlion]

guess whooooo ! 🎤🐍

my favorite part of the experience (not really a specific part of tit so not a spoiler for anyone that sees this) was that it just made it so clear how much they love us and each other and it warms my heart that the phandom has come this far and it truly feels like a phamily :))

im sorry to hear about your scholarship ! hopefully you can get it back, and i hope with all of my heart that you can get any resources you need to do whats right for you. im actually taking this semester off doing online courses at a community college in my hometown, but next semester i'll go back to my university and try to pick up where i left off. school isn't for everyone, i'm coming to learn, but unfortunately it feels required 😫

i only started listening to muse maybe 2 months ago at most and they've quickly racked up minutes on my spotify. i wouldn't be surprised if they came out at number 1 despite the odds. i cant believe ive gone like 8 years in the phandom without giving a proper listen to them, besides uprising. i suppose the current fixation is the best i can do to make up for lost time 💪

chinese is so cool omg. ive never tried learning it but from my understanding it's rather complicated. i understand spanish as i grew up with it and with that means mildly understanding other latin based languages, like french. speaking, grammar, conjugation and the like are a different story tho, so hopefully one day i'll lock in and level up my skills and be able to actually say i'm fluent in spanish

i was gonna write something in french but i've quickly realized i know like actually nothing... if i read a meme in french i could probably get it but i have no vocabulary so cheval fromage oui oui baguette i guess 🥖

i am totally a serial killer and im outside your house ready to practice signing with you 🤺

for reasons undisclosed i do think you're onto me 😅 while i'm enjoying the pen-pal-snail-mail we've got going, i'll maybeeeee send a dm soon if i can stop being insane. i haven't talked to new people or made online friends in a really long time and for some reason a part of me feels like i'll be shot on sight for the crime of being mildly annoying lmao

throwing breadcrumbs at your window,

-🐍

that was definitely my favourite part of tit too. i love how much they love us, and that they're no longer afraid to love eachother out loud. it felt so special, like a little secret and a huge family gathering at the same time. i get emotional if i think about how much growth this required. i also got to meet one mutual (hi manda if you're reading this), so that was pretty fun too.

don't worry about my scholarship, thankfully it doesn't make or break uni for me. honestly, i feel like i do have access to the resources i need to be successful i just... can't? i'm too stuck in my head with some things that i don't think i should share publicly. but it makes it really hard to gather the focus or motivation to do any of my work. i'm pretty much staring at my very very manageable pile of things to do and going "fuck, let me think about something i don't even enjoy thinking about instead!" yeah, not very effective. i get what you mean, school really does feel like a necessity. and it feels like a waste to quit it when i've already invested money and time into it. i hope your time with online school has been good to you, i wouldn't mind moving entirely online myself, but i don't really want to move back in with my parents. hopefully things are looking up for you.

i like muse a lot, at least the handful of songs that i've listened to. i think they make excellent use of lyrical and musical tension and are overall just stellar artists. animals reminds me of "the execution of all things" by rilo kiley. not really sure why, but i wonder if you can get what i mean by listening.

it can be complicated, things like the order of strokes you write with matter, so does the exact look of the character, same with small tonal changes per sound that don't exist in english (because it isn't a tonal language). all of that can completely change the meaning of a phrase both in written and spoken chinese, which can be complicated to get a grasp of, especially if you haven't grown up around languages formatted in that way. but an important thing to keep in mind in linguistics is that all languages are equally complex and equally capable of communicating the ideas they need to communicate. i did spend a year learning spanish, but i honestly forgot i did that until my mom reminded me of it. i could probably say 10 words, total, and that's just based on guesses from my knowledge of french. i think you could definitely become fluent in spanish, though. a lot of people have the misconception that language can't be competently acquired past a certain age, but it's really a matter of native-like fluency & acquisition being easier prior to that age. you probably won't be able to speak like a native, but who cares, language is fun and an important bridge between people. you sound like dan in pinof 1 haha. don't serial kill me!

hah, i'm assuming my guess is definitely right then. but i can't lie, i honestly enjoy this snail-mail thing too. it's fun, and i like not having to respond instantly (now i have extra time to panic, score!) the only thing is i'm a little embarrassed that my other followers can read this haha. (hi guys). 😅 but don't worry, you can take all the time you need to get comfortable. i'm not in a rush, i'll be here hunched over my computer until the worms consume my flesh. if you can figure out a way to send snail mail that's a little less public, i'm totally open to ideas. oh and don't stress about annoying me, i really do prefer people who are stereotypically "annoying". i'm pretty bad at keeping up with friendships, i tend to not know when to respond and be pretty dry, which ends up with a lot of my relationships lasting 6 months or less, which is honestly kind of depressing. if i ever do make things awkward or haven't mailed in forever, you're always free to come poke me with a stick.

anyway, sorry for the rambles. politely setting up a heating pad for you

[torchickentacos]

i finished atla after putting it off for years like, literally last week and im interested in what you have to say about zuki since i dont really know much of what happens after the main story ends, do you have any posts about it? or you can take this as an open invitation to atla ramble [:

HIIIIIII ok every time I mention Zuki I get a weird look since it's a rarepair who barely interacts in the show, but if someone's read the comics it comes together a bit! BASICALLY, SPOILERS FOR COMICS UNDER CUT!!! long post, I cannot resist inserting the comic panels here and honestly they speak for themselves. just in case this post breaches cointainment, Obligatory "I vibe with most ships and my love of one does not equal hatred of anyone else's, and if you like them platonically LOVELY!!!!! I vibe with that too".

First off, Suki and the kyoshi warriors become Zuko's bodyguards post-canon, with Suki as the head of them. In the comics we see a fair bit of this, with a lot of Zuko scenes having her in it too. So, we've got a bodyguard/royalty dynamic, which I am absolutely WEAK for (see: zelink from breath of the wild).

But more than this, they're friends. And I do like Maiko, don't get me wrong here- and I adore Sukka as well- but I think there's a distinct difference in how Zuko interacts with Mai and Suki. Namely, he shut Mai out and lets Suki in, telling her about his worries-especially in a time where he's not doing well.

Also, another thing in the comics is this: there's a point where Zuko feels like he's sliding back and becoming his father, and goes to the point of almost fighting the rest of the gaang. But, oh, there's someone who stood by him the whole time when near nobody else did! guess who.

And realistically, I know they just wanted some romantic tension in the comics but didn't want to break up kataang, so they broke up maiko and did whatever this is, with Sukka being long-distance. BUt I honestly think Zuki, platonic or not, has a huge amount of suki's support that Zuko lacked in Mai. I think Maiko could be really nice, but I feel like Suki uplifts Zuko in a way that Mai maybe didn't or just couldn't.

I think it also opens an avenue for Mai's characterization, and I like exploring her through Zuki in a "If I (Mai) stay with Zuko, I can't ever have peace, I'll be fire lady and never know a day of self-sufficience or true independence, and I don't know if I want that from life". I think Mai is very prideful and truthfully? I don't think she'd want a life of palaces and being guarded. It was an aspect of her in ATLA, distancing herself from her rich powerful family, and I don't see her choosing that life again.

As for Sokka, I LOVE him and I LOVE Sukka, but it lacks spice for me. Sukka almost works TOO perfectly. No conflict, other than long distance, but Zuki has forbidden bodyguard royalty stuff which I am, pardon my language, an absolute slut for. I mean, furtive glances across crowded hallways and secretive shoulder brushes and letters slipped through doors, hoping, praying nobody sees the lowly earth kingdom warrior and the regal firelord??? 10/10.

Also. It's just funny as hell. https://twitter.com/M1KASAD/status/1284621851763838976

[kquil]

hiii! Can I request a 🧁? I think I already have- but I did it wrong? I'm so sorry if you got this twice...

I'm 5'3 - with dark brown hair with caramel highlights - tan skin - and dark brown eyes, I'm an ENTP & Hufflepuff... I'm smart, loving, kind and energetic! I like to read, listen to music, horse riding and hang out with my friends...

I have a quiet money aesthetic/chic aesthetic and I speak fluent French!! (I love your writing and I love this event that you're hosting!)

Have a nice day!!

don’t worry darling, you requested it right the first time but i’ll be responding through this second ask if that’s alright with you

thank you so much for the congratulations and im so sorry this took so long to get out to you, i hope you like who i ended up shipping you with and welcome to the marauders era side of the harry potter fandom hehe~

I ship you with Regulus Black

i. regulus loves how caring and kind you are, he doesn’t care if he is criticised by other slytherins for dating a hufflepuff; the majority of them can’t even look him in the eyes anyway, as the only heir to the Black family. you care for him like no other person has in his life and he’s ashamed to admit that after getting a taste of it, he craves it every single day but only from you, you are the singular being he would stay orbiting forever. seeing you care for animals and children so naturally, it’s easy for him to see a future with you that’s full to bursting with love and happiness and laughter, the way all ideal marriages should be — he wants all of that with you, he’ll make sure of it. 

ii. the two of you go horse riding together and it’s always the best of fun. it started off as you wanting to introduce him to your horse and then teaching him how to befriend and care for horses and now he has regular outings with you, just you, where you ride horses together, sharing smiles and laughter all the while. he cherishes every second of it. 

iii. the dynamic between you two is that you stand at the front, happy, smiling and his perfect love as he stands to your side but also behind you, close enough to hold your hand and, if he wanted to, lean his head on your shoulder. he looks at you with so much love that his face lights up with a warmth that all others are too shocked to comprehend. if anyone dares try to talk badly to you or try to ruin your day somehow and he can see it coming, you bet he’ll be the first person to get in their way, stopping them in their tracks with an icy glare and deep-set frown, silently daring them to their worse and see what happens…

iv. when he found out you spoke fluent french, he was ecstatic to regale you with all the sweet, loving words he could muster in the beautiful language daily. he took full advantage of it, whispering in your ear innocently but with a smirk on his lips and even blurting out a ‘tu es toujours auss belle, mon cœur’ in front of your friends or other groups of people, just to see your flustered expression. he had no fear because nobody else would understand. it was a secret language, a secret way of communication between you two and that made it special for him. It was also a relief to finally be able to express his deep love for you in the open in some way. you never expected him to be so bold as he was usually so reserved and silent in his affections but now you understood why he was brothers with sirius blackv. not that you needed his approval but he adores your quiet money/chic style of fashion, it was a fashion style that perfectly matched his and it was just another way of confirming to his love-deprived, aching heart that you two were meant to be together. yes, it’s a superficial and convoluted reason to pair you two together but the little things were more romantic to him than the bigger gestures or the stereotypical signs for true love — what you two had was special, you were special and that’s all he’ll ever accept because it’s what you deserve. he loves you soooo much…

1K MILESTONE EVENT : CLOSED | NAVI.