#so much more could be done with my hardware but for some reason the software hasn’t changed in years

[queervegancryptid]

I'm working on a book for people new to Linux. I've been using it since I was around 18, when I got my first laptop. This was 2007, and it was expensive for someone as poor as me to get a computer, which is why my parents didn't buy me one until I started college and moved out. I also got my first phone at this age, a $20 AT&T brick. Nothing like what we have today.

It shipped with Windows XP, which already wasn't great, but then came the Vista update, and I was a little peeved. I thought, "This can be done better." And I don't remember how, but I stumbled upon Linux and open source software in general. I'm poor, but I had some blank CDs and DVDs, so I started trying different distros to find one I liked. I played around with it and learned a lot, both about Linux as an OS and about hardware, software, and firmware more generally. How the parts fit together, what each one does and how, etc. I'm not an expert, but I learn best by doing. By playing, really.

I'm glad I developed this background knowledge, because a couple years later, my laptop was stolen. I was stuck living with my parents and had no prospects, but I did have some old computer parts.

Really old ones. Way too little storage and RAM for modern Windows or macOS, then called OS X. So I had to get creative with some obscure distros, like Damn Small Linux. It wasn't perfect, but it was also a machine cobbled together with spare parts that arguably should have been trashed but thankfully weren't.

Being in these situations sucks, but it's also cool to know that you can do stuff to survive if you absolutely must. And with the enshittification of tech lately, especially with Windows shoehorning in its AI bullshit and forcing you to upload shit to the cloud, a lot of people are going to be looking for an alternative. Since I've been there, I figured I could write a short guide for people in this position.

Linux appeals to me for a number of reasons. It's very customizable, so in practical terms, I do enjoy that. There are also a lot of different distros to choose from, and most of them work well out of the box. (That wasn't always the case.) But I'm mostly drawn to open source as a philosophical concept. It's like the opposite of the software-as-service and subscription models favored by a lot of companies today. I'm still really mad that I can't mod my Switch without risking my Nintendo account being kneecapped, as an example. They can do that in part because of the closed-source nature of their product.

On that note, gaming has also come a long way on Linux. I still dual-boot Windows alongside it, because once or twice a year, I run into something that I can't make work on Linux. It would probably be more accurate to say that I don't feel like making it work on Linux, because it probably can be done, but the effort is more than I feel like expending for the payoff.

My only real complaint about it is that the fingerprint scanner on my laptop doesn't work with Linux. But I also don't need it to, so it isn't a deal-breaker for me. It would be nice, but I'm already not super comfortable with anyone having my biometric data, so it isn't like I'm champing at the bit to make it work. Still, even if it did, it wouldn't be sent to anyone. Can't say I'm confident that the same is true of Microsoft and Apple and Google.

But when you get away from those companies, you realize how much of their shtick is about selling you things and collecting info about you. You want your computer to do basic computer stuff again without the unnecessary AI shit baked right into the cake? Use Linux. It will change your life.

Want to stick it to your capitalist overlords? Use Linux. I mean, do other things, too. But using Linux is a good start.

[rearranged-fanfic]

(Update 6/3)

Sit down a spell, weary traveler. Come and sit by my fire; bask in the warmth of the flame and rest your aching scrolling finger. You'll be sitting a while, for I have a tale to tell:

Okay, so I've had a Toshiba laptop for the better part of ten years. Maybe a little longer. That laptop has survived being struck by lightning, submerged in a bathtub, and literally having a whole bookcase topple down onto it. I thought it was immortal...

I was sadly mistaken.

About six months ago, I noticed that the typing was getting sluggish. I'd patter away at the keyboard and the letters would appear with a bit of lag. That's fine, since I use Dragon to talk-to-text for quite a bit of my writing. I really only use the keyboard for final assembly, editing, and doing quick rewrites. So, it really didn't bother me. Fastforward to April, which we will call The Great Depression. The time discrepancy between typing and having letters appear on screen became a whopping 40 seconds. Yes, I timed it.

But that was okay, because I could still use my Dragon headset.

Until I couldn't.

It would connect, but the words wouldn't appear on screen. I made sure that all of my programs were up-to-date, and that everything was working. The headset connected to my family's computers just fine. So that meant it was something wrong with mine.

Without being sure if it was the hardware or software at fault, I backed everything up to OneDrive and Google Docs.

I factory reset.

Twice. To no avail.

Over the next few days, my laptop stopped registering any keyboard input at all. It got to a point where I wasn't able to turn it on or off.

Taking it to an electronics store to get repaired didn't help, either. No luck. They said that it would be more cost effective to just buckle down and get a new one, since the age of the laptop meant that I would probably be constantly maintaining it.

My poor Toshiba died kicking and screaming, putting up a fight worthy of an epic ballad.

I saved up for a few weeks, got a new laptop, and went through the rigmarole of getting all of my programs back on it. My files are in order. My life is in shambles (but that's normal, LOL).

I DID do some story work without my computer, but... it's bad. Like, I'd die in shame if I posted anything that I thumbed in. So. Many. Spelling. Errors. How people write on their phone is beyond me. That's a talent I simply don't possess.

At this point, I'm thinking of renaming this story "HIATUS" lol. JK. But I'm seriously peeved that this happened after my last big break. Why couldn't the Depression and laptop breakdown coincide nicely? I guess that's too much to ask of the universe *Shakes fist at the sky*.

I'm creating a damn bingo card for every stupid thing that happens to me while I try to write. Because this is getting ridiculous. I broke my fingers, there was a total solar eclipse, I had a major-ish mental breakdown, and my computer bit the big one. With a free space, that's a bingo. Let's hope I don't get a blackout before the end of 2024.

I doubted the fanfiction curse. I really did. But it's apparently real. And this writer's curse has teeth, people. It bites hard.

I have my MerMay two-shot pretty well done (because I was typing it during The Great Depression), but the next chapter for REARRANGED is still rough. Crimson Chapter 3 is halfway done, but who knows how long that'll take.

The bottom line is that I'm alive and still working on the stories. The next update on this blog will be the posting of several chapters for a few different works. Fingers crossed.

Also, I'm very, very slowly answering the comments in my AO3 inbox. Some of them were pretty lengthy, so it might take a bit. Oof.

If there ever comes a time that I drop this fanfiction or am unable to continue for whatever reason, either I or my husband will be posting the entirety of my outline, as well as anything that's been pre-written for you guys to enjoy. That way there are no questions left unanswered or mysteries unsolved.

[orbitofglass-admin]

Orbit, this is the nebula comb Oros en route to scheduled dock on the Luminous Arc. We're running with nearly a full tank of unprocessed dust, the tank gauges are looking higher than average for our deut haul but you'll let us know if that means a new record, eh 'Rita? Hoping to get all top five slots occupied by Dust crews, show those stuck up Sand types how it's done.

Headed to the usual dock on your transmitted approach vector. Stand by for unloading and upkeep, I'm hoping we can get the dock done quick so the crew can get some quality R&R arcside.

[GENET-ORBIT///INITIALIZING.DELIBERATING] [QUERY:::DOCK] [INTERLOCUTOR:::FOREMAN GREEN//NC-OROS] [VOICE:::OA05L-Aurita]

Heard, Oros. Your approach looks good, just make sure you're not clipping the dock below you again. Farnese might try to take it from your pay.

[INTERLOCUTOR:::FOREMAN GREEN//NC-OROS]

Don't even joke with me about that. I almost had to get the other crews to strike just to make sure they didn't take it all.

[VOICE:::OA05L-Aurita]

Well it doesn't look like you're going to do it this time. If you've got the new kid on controls again, you should give them my compliments.

[INTERLOCUTOR:::FOREMAN GREEN//NC-OROS]

Nah, after last time I'm not taking any chances, and especially not with this haul. If the scans are right and we have this much deut and trit, I'm not chancing any kind of leak. Play my cards right and I could get the the whole crew into top floor condos in Verdant with this kind of cash, go tea partying with all the nobles up there.

[VOICE:::OA05L-Aurita]

Don't go counting your credit before it's cached, Oros.

[INTERLOCUTOR:::FOREMAN GREEN//NC-OROS]

Heard, Orbit. I'll be practicing my surprised face for when we get our pay back from the refineries tomorrow. It's gonna be a good week on leave, let me tell you.

[VOICE:::OA05L-Aurita]

Speaking of which, you should budget another week into your leave. Orders from the top.

[INTERLOCUTOR:::FOREMAN GREEN//NC-OROS]

Orders from the— from who? If it's Farnese again we're going to have words.

[VOICE:::OA05L-Aurita]

Above him. The Genet has reason to believe they're direct from the Patronage, or at least an agent of it.

[INTERLOCUTOR:::FOREMAN GREEN//NC-OROS]

The fuck does the Patronage want with my crew?

[VOICE:::OA05L-Aurita]

"All nebula combs and starcrackers making dock must have a complete inventory of hardware and software done." Based on the amount we have to go through, in addition to the usual maintenance, I estimate an extra week.

At least it's a good time to spend all that extra credit.

[INTERLOCUTOR:::FOREMAN GREEN//NC-OROS]

Fuck that, 'Rita, some of the guys got people back home that need the manna. If this haul isn't actually record setting, we can't afford to take another week off to sit around like that. Wolf's tits, some of them might not like it even if we are sitting on more than usual.

[VOICE:::OA05L-Aurita]

Sorry, Kel. Orders are orders.

[INTERLOCUTOR:::FOREMAN GREEN//NC-OROS]

Hey, I ain't blaming you. Listen, though. If you could do me a favor and give me the info of the git that made that order, though...

[hosttos]

There's one class I'm taking this semester that is actually making me reanalyze my whole life, it's called Digital Electronics 1, doesn't sound very exciting (and it isn't), yet my experience with it has been nothing short of surreal, like The Twilight Zone surreal, it may not seem so from what I'm about to tell, but I'm currently considering the possibility that the devil's messing with me for funsies.

The first couple of classes were as normal as they could be, from time to time this weird geeky teacher would say some things I didn't understand, however pretty much everyone else in the class seemed unphased by them so I didn't think much of it at first. As weeks went by I couldn't help but notice it happened more and more frequently.

This class also has a lab component, which has never been my strong suit, but in this case I thought it'd be much easier since pretty much all work would be on the computer and not an actual lab. It was hell. First two classes or so were meant to install special software in our computers to control a FPGA board (a board whose hardware you can manipulate via software through your computer), I could not for the life of me follow a four step tutorial on how to do it. The tutorial was as good as a tutorial can be, or so I think, but ok the second step I was already losing my mind: files that were supposed to appear didn't exist, lines of code in my computer were blocked for some reason, packages were asking for money even though I had a license already, etc. This went on for two weeks.

After having to talk for hours with the lab assistant I ended up with an erased hard disk running only Linux on my ONLY computer (as opposed to having a half partition for Linux and half for Windows, what it was supposed to be) but most of the required software was running just fine, I thought this was acceptable, nothing I could complain about since I was already two weeks behind on the required lab reports, the teacher said he was flexible with the established dates so I didn't worry much.

When I actually started reading the lab guides my second personal hell started, I understood in full everything I was supposed to do but had absolutely zero idea on how to do it, I gave it a couple of hours at home to try but got nothing from it, before giving up I thought maybe if I was THAT lost I wasn't the only one struggling with it, so I waited for the next class before trying again. I was, apparently, very wrong.

Next class for some reason everyone was having trouble. To be precise, they were all having a problem I did not even understand, and they all had easily overcome the trouble I was having when they faced it. I was so embarrassed I had to wait for the class to end to ask the teacher for help, which she very happily did: she pointed out what was wrong with the hardware description (fancy talk for "code"), manually corrected some things that were keeping my software from running correctly (which I should have noticed) and gave me some general advice. I was so embarrassed to admit I didn't understand any of what she said that I just thanked her and left.

I started sleeping less, some nights I would try to make a sense of what she told me and I could make nothing of it, nada, nothing at all, I understood all the individual words that made up the advice she gave me but the sum of them made no sense in my mind.

Non-lab classes were good though, I understood all the theoretical components and all the topics covered, although from time to time the teacher would zone out for a while and say some truly insane shit I couldn't even begin to grasp the concept of, but since these didn't seem to affect the over all course of the class and I seemed to be the only confused one, things went by just fine.

As weeks went by I got more and more embarrassed just walking into that lab, every week at home I thought I finally made some progress just to find out my labmates had done thrice my work in half the time. But the worst part is how I just stopped understanding anything at all in that lab room, the teacher would explain something and everyone just kind of nodded in agreement for hours at a time, I felt dumber at the end of every class. I tried asking friends, they seemed as cursed as the teacher, with all the goodness in their hearts they'd start explaining things to me but at that moment my brain would lock completely and no knowledge could come in, I could tell they meant well, they were very nice too, and explained in very simple terms, it is absolutely clear at this point the problem is me.

I spent most of my class time wondering how all these people understood so well a programming language none of us were familiar with. They just went along with it, it was easy for them, and it seemed easy too, none of the reports required more than 20 or so lines of code to work. But once I stared at the screen for one hour trying to understand what the first 10 lines of code meant, I saw YouTube tutorials and Reddit forums looking for help, but it just didn't click.

I finished 4 lab reports in 8 weeks, a true miracle considering I didn't understand most of them. The remainder of the semester is to be spent making a project based on all we learned, and as such, the lab teacher would only be available for advice regarding the project. I tried to be optimistic about this.

First class that was meant to be spent solving problems about said project (a Tamagotchi). I went in with the hopes of asking for help but when I saw some of the other projects and how advanced they were I died a little. Some people asked some questions that seemed so much more advanced than mine I just couldn't bring myself to ask, I'm normally not so shy about asking teachers for help but this was different, my question really seemed like an offense to ask at that point. I felt the strongest need to leave that room I had just walked into five minutes prior.

At this point I feel like I'm truly losing my mind, I can't walk into that class and not feel I'm the dumbest person in the room, sometimes I even feel they're all aware of it too, I don't think it's the way they look at me, because as I said they're all very nice, but I can't help but feel they are all acting like they don't notice the toddler in the room that wants to act like an adult.

I couldn't take the psychological damage I was getting from that class so I started working on the project at home, not nearly as fast as I'm supposed to but I got some things accomplished eventually. When time came to test things I was not so surprised when nothing worked.

I made several attempts to get things running without any success at all, a few weeks went by and I finally asked for help from a classmate. She lent me some code and, fascinatingly enough, her code did exactly the same thing as mine, the only difference being hers does work. So I tried her code on my computer and, surprise, it didn't on mine. I'm absolutely certain all my components work (because I had to replace some) and my computer and the board both work fine because I actually ran stuff from the labs on it, so no reasonable explanation so far.

Once again I feel like the universe just fucking hates me, and the fucker knows where to hit me for maximum effect, I see that fucking code in my dreams, I can't sleep at night thinking about it, there is a leprechaun living on my walls changing my connections and ruining my code everytime I look away as a running joke for an audience I can't see. It's going to be the last thing I see before I die, I know for sure.

This class is nothing different to what I have taken before, the required courses to take the class I passed with high grades even, it can't be such a jump, and it isn't apparently. Most people seem okay with this class, some of my friends have taken it already and said it was a pretty tame experience?!?but I'm on the verge of insanity and nothing a person in that class says can seem to help me in any way. I'm truly on the verge of something fundamental in me changing, I don't want to know what and I especially don't want it to happen.

[sadwinning]

Devlog 1 (1/25/24): Why This Is Pointless

In my intro post, I mentioned how it would be much easier to map the 12 chromatic notes of Western music to the 3 action buttons and 8 directions of Undertale, and how I won't be doing that for purely aesthetic reasons. I also want to mention why everything I'm doing to my violin is completely stupid.

If you want to follow in my footsteps, you shouldn't do it the way I'm doing it. You probably can't.

My violin is a Yamaha EV-205 five-string electric from the late aughts/early 10's. I recently learned that this violin is no longer in production, so there's no way your standard Joe Schmoe can pick up this tutorial, nor would they want to if they were in the market for an electric violin, because they already sell electric violins that are MIDI controller enabled. You should buy that and follow the software specs of CZR drums and their MIDI-to-controller software partner/whatever. I simply do not want to spend more money on an electric violin when I already have one with the right hardware (individual pickups for each of the five strings). So I will be voiding the warranty that likely no longer exists and busting open my violin to see what I can patch together.

When I busted this component (pictured above) open I immediately found a not-so-complex PCB where I could locate each of the individual string inputs. I have yet to see whether those ports will give me the inputs I need - golly, I have yet to learn how to solder enough to access those ports!! - but the visibility gives me hope. it doesn't look hard, especially for someone who has been low-key interested in soldering for like 15 years (since my Pokemon Gold copy's battery died and I learned the ways to replace it) but I can't say I know exactly what data flows through that part of the circuit and how easy it would be to extract and manipulate.

I've done a lot of research into what I would need to take analog audio signal(s) and transform them into MIDI or some other binary/digital data. The first thing I found was an Arduino library, so I knew this wouldn't be hard. I only have one Arduino (knock-off) and I didn't like the idea of buying four more (one for each string) to get the MIDI values when I would probably be connected to a computer the whole time no matter what.

This led me to where I'm sitting pretty right now, at a Python library (Python being my favorite language) that uses its GitHub .md file to explain why Markov chains are important. Reader, do you know how much I love Markov chains? Did you know that in my sophomore year of college I created a musical AI by programming Markov chains in Python??? How is it that all of my interests loop in upon each other in the same way that my first and only job out of college involved natural language processing in Python just like my senior project where I did language analysis on okcupid profiles???? Is time in fact a flat circle? I don't have time to think about this because I want to program violin to play undertale pleas

Where I'll be starting is with this library and with monophonic input (one note at a time rather than interpreting multiple notes at once e.g. multiple strings played simultaneously) to make a controller of any kind work. But I have a lot of reading to do to see how Markov chains are involved. With it being both Python and linear algebra, I have the capacity to adjust the code to do whatever I want it to do. Given this insane opportunity I can't not do all the research possible to finetune things to my precise desires. If I were satisfied with "good enough", I would be playing monophonic input the whole way through. Let's go insane, boys.

[blazehedgehog]

Is it possible to make a game like Sonic 3 today within the deadlines it had back then? Pixel art, physics and all.

Why wouldn't it be?

It was the third game in the series. They already had a very strong idea of what they were trying to do with the character, they already had proven technology under them that they could easily extend and upgrade. They had been doing this on Sonic for three years already, and some of the people had been working for Sega even longer than that.

These were talented, experienced people. Professionals. Having the prior knowledge to be able to say, "if we do X, then we get Y" allowed them to work quickly and efficiently.

So I would compare it to, say, what I did with OverBite. OverBite was a game I made for a Clickteam Fusion Game Jam in 2016. We had from like, September 30th or even the 29th up to October 31st to make an entire game. It came out to something like 33 days.

So I made this game where you play as Dracula. I wrote all the code, designed all the mechanics, made all of the sprites, and built all of the levels. Alone. By myself. A single person. The only other person to help me with anything was my old friend Malcolm Brown, who handed me some music.

I had JUST bought Clickteam Fusion 2.5 on Steam, which means it had 0 hours of usage registered. I used it to make OverBite, which means I could track exactly how many hours I spent working on the game, and though I don't remember the exact total, I remember after doing the math it ended up shaking out to between 9 to 11 hours a day, 7 days a week, for 33 days. It was more than 300 hours total.

Again. For one person. I'm not saying it's the greatest game ever made. The level design in particular was extremely last second -- literally, I was down to the last day, only really had finished the gameplay engine, so I cobbled together four levels in a few hours and put it up seconds before the deadline at midnight. But the point is that I had worked in Clickteam Fusion for a decade and a half and could execute on my needs very well. I knew the software and the process like the back of my hand.

Now imagine having two people like that. Or five. Or ten. "300 hours of work in one month" suddenly turns into 3000 hours in one month. Using tech they already have, and proven gameplay concepts they have a lot of familiarity with.

It still wasn't easy, mind you. But the concepts that made it work back then not only still work today, they probably work even better because you aren't fighting to squeeze things down into such limited hardware. Like, the entire reason a game jam can even exist as a concept at all is because at a certain level of development, things are just easier now.

A game jam in 1994 is an impossible concept to think of because the tools had to be so super specialized to an incredibly narrow kind of work environment. You had to be a genius computer scientist to get something like Sonic the Hedgehog to function, never mind how much money it would cost to get something like a development kit.

Today, literally anyone can pick up a copy of Godot or Unreal 5, watch a few Youtube tutorials, and make a game from their bedroom with consumer tools. And those tools are faster, easier, and more intuitive to work with than anything that came before. It cannot be understated what a huge concept that is, and how that used to be totally impossible 15-20 years ago.

(And before some British dude rolls up like "yeah well you could always do that with the amiga" -- that's true, but it's also still different, and the fact that you can just give Microsoft $20 to unlock "Developer Mode" on an Xbox and start pushing Unity and Unreal games you develop on your PC to a console is still mindblowing in context.)

And it trickles down, too. If you know the conversion process, you can use these nice amazing modern tools to make proper retro games that run on real retro hardware.

All of this is to say that just because it's easier doesn't mean it should be done. OverBite absolutely slaughtered me. 11 hours of game development a day, 7 days a week, for almost five solid weeks was deeply unhealthy, physically and mentally. I haven't come close to finishing any game project, ever, since OverBite. It fried me.

And on Sonic Team's side, Sonic 3 was so massively stressful for them that they quit making Sonic games for almost half a decade. Crunch time development like that hurts in many ways, both visible and (mostly) invisible.

But yes, it could still absolutely be done.

[vadapega]

Rummaging through my old room I find this, a traditional flip note of Pantufa the Cat from 2011 or earlier, with rusty staples and, according to the numbers on the corner, missing frames.

For detailed ramblings of hidden memories this unlocked, click for more

I've always wanted to be an animator and, while I didn’t have the software or hardware for digital animation, I wanted to practice is as much as I could. This was the best I could put together at the age of 16.

I would do small scale animations at the edges of notebooks or draft ideas in comic form with notes before I knew what a Storyboard was. Back then I didn't even have a stable internet connection in the first place, this was around the time I had to share a PC with my older brother who would kick me out at any opportunity and hog the PC for the entire day, only letting me on at the last minute, where I would get an earful from my parents and be told to go to bed, it was a nightmare to do anything digitally...

The first drawing tablet I got was considered scrap the moment I got it for Christmas. No screen, wobbly inaccurate pen (can't draw a straight line without it looking like lightning), Silvercrest branded (basically, LIDL), it was as cheap as it could be but it was my introduction to "not using the mouse to draw" which it did not help with as even today revisiting it makes me want to draw with a mouse more.

Things were very strict and if something did what it needed to do, it didn't need to be replaced. "That's what I had been taught"If it ain't broke, don't fix it" was the motto for my family and that mentality stuck to me even to the present day. I still find myself using MSPaint for Pixelart or drawings, as spending for anything greater is hardwired in my brain as "unnecessary" or "wasteful", hell, I wasn't even allowed to spend money outside of school purchases such as at the cafeteria (they had a kickass card charging system which made the school I attended in Germany around 2016-2019 look medieval in comparison which is incredible since Portugal isn't the first thing you think of when it comes to technological advancements), so any money I would get for Christmas or birthdays was practically useless and I never learned to manage income. I would sometimes find my mom take the money off my piggy bank for groceries and other goods when she was running low, she didn't try to lie, she had no reason to.

Anything I can get for free is what I stick by and I'll only spend money if I absolutely have to or, more recently, if it benefited close friends in any way, as I've learned to have no regard for my own well being and should be ashamed for even considering it, others always take priority.

So when it comes to animation today, I have a "yar har" version of Toon Boom Studio 8.0 for bigger things (I've tried OpenToonz but it's very crash happy and I've lost hours of animation with it even with the backup and auto save features on, back in the day I had a a copy of Flash CS4 I grabbed from the school computers that I got to work after some tinkering and a well placed crack) and for Pixelart I just use Windows XP's MSPaint and abuse scroll-wheel and window resizing shenanigans to advance frames. I don't get much time to practice animation and I get easily excited to have a chance at it.

I'm under my own mental shackles at all times and that's not going to change, only further cemented by the elitist mindset the Sonic Hacking community and SRB2 had taught me, a mindset I regret adopting and one I catch myself going back to and feeling ashamed of every now and then, leading only to depressive episodes that are best left for a psychologist to deal with... should I ever find the opportunity to seek one without time and language barrier issues.

As the years go by and I find myself doing or just refining Pixelart than to do animated pieces, I've given up hope in being an animator in the foreseeable future, only dedicating animation to those done in private between friends, never allowing myself to clean up or refining it in any meaningful way unless asked for because I shouldn't. It's why I tend to ask for suggestions or characters to add for animations I plan to do, cause I don't want it to be for me, I want it to be for those I can make happy to see it.

---

Before I hit "Post", a reminder that there are people much worse off than I am, these are just memories and 1st world problems and should be nobody's priority. Please support growing young artists and animators, they need it more than some washed up wanna-be animator that is known for nothing else but basic Sonic ROM hacks disguised to look impressive via a coat of MSPaint.

[comicaurora]

Because it's currently screwing up my week, I gotta ask you: have you done practice comics before Aurora? How did you prep for it in general?

I absolutely drew practice comics before Aurora. Nothing I ever published anywhere, but I had a few short digital comics, mostly unconnected shorts from Aurora, with one notable exception where I translated a scene from Midsummer Night's Dream into comic form for a class assignment. Before the digital art I had pages and pages in sketchbooks doodled in comic format, some as far back as first grade - the ones that early had nothing to do with Aurora and were mostly superhero-related. I even tried to do a newspaper-comic-style 4-panel format for a while, and I spent one summer in my early teens inspired by What's New With Phil And Dixie (an early comic done by Phil Foglio, creator of the comic-turned-webcomic Girl Genius, which was basically a full-page "gaming news" comic from the age before videogames dominated that conversation and was mostly focused on Magic: The Gathering) doodling comics about Warhammer 40K. Had a brief stint junior year doodling full-page comic-ifications of particularly impactful Doctor Who scenes in my composition notebooks in the back of class. None of it was good, but it was definitely good practice, at least conceptually and for fleshing out a visual and narrative style.

Prepping for actually releasing Aurora didn't involve too many practice comics, but at that point I was already very familiar with the software and tablet hardware I was going to use, as well as the medium of comics in general. That was probably the most important thing to nail down, since otherwise I was going to be learning on my feet more than I had to. At that point I felt like practice comics would just be me stalling, honestly - giving me time to overthink or second-guess myself when I already knew I was going to be learning as I went and I'd done all the preparation I could reasonably do from the outside. There's only so much you can know about what a project is going to look like before you've started it, and you can't frontload all the preparation for the work when you don't know what you're going to need to work on.

I think the sketchy practice comics helped, but probably not as substantively as binge-reading comics did. Newspaper comics, four-panel and full-page comics, superhero comics old and new, Scary Godmother, Asterix, Tintin, Calvin And Hobbes, Usagi Yojimbo, Akiko, Girl Genius, Elfquest, Astro City, W.I.T.C.H., Ranma 1/2, several tragically short-lived manga series running for four chapters each in Shonen Jump - zero consistency in style or layout, no genre limitations, just a really good sweeping awareness of what comics as a medium could look like. Getting a feel for that almost certainly helped me get a running start.

[writingtoforgetreality]

Power Broker - TFATWS Rewrite Chapter Three (Bucky Barnes x Reader)

[Marvel-Masterlist], [TFATWS Rewrite-Masterlist]

Previous Chapter / Next Chapter

Summary: Zemo & you had a history. That did not stop you from following him. Much to your dismay. Madripoor. That was where you were headed. You would see what awaited you there.

Words: 11,979

Warnings: language, violence, injury, blood, angst, sarcasm, humor, sass, Zemo being himself (help, I love him), cute & protective Bucky, fluff, spoilers for TFATWS, (Y/E/C) = your eye color

If you like my work & wanna support me: a coffee would be highly appreciated ❤

Berlin. You would so regret the decision to really do this. It was no secret that you did not agree with Bucky’s plan. At all. The three of you followed a guard down a white hallway. The atmosphere here was everything but comfortable.

“He’s just through that corridor.” his thick, German accent came through. He left the three of you alone.

“Alright, I’m gonna go in alone.” Bucky started. Your eyes widened at that.

“Why?” thank you, Sam. An explanation was needed here.

“’Cause you’re an Avenger. You know how he feels about that.” you silently observed the conversation between the two men in front of you. If it got out of hand, you would intervene.

“It’s not like you two were known for frocklin’ in the sun together.” if it were not for the situation to be this serious you would have actually laughed at that. Not the right timing.

“He was obsessed with HYDRA. We have a history together. Trust me. I got it.” the moment Bucky wanted to walk away, you spoke up.

“Uh, I hate to interrupt…” you stopped briefly when two pairs of eyes stared at you. “But you’re not the only person to have a history with him, you know that, right?” your eyebrows raised in question. The super soldier simply rolled his eyes at you. He knew what you were trying to do.

“You don’t like him.” Bucky reasoned.

“And you do?” you shot back, arms crossing over your chest. He sighed out & put his hands on his hips. “That’s what I thought. Let me come with you.” slow & steady words left you.

“I won’t let you, (Y/N). That’s something I have to do alone.” your mouth opened to argue with him. Something he stopped right away. “And you can’t change my mind.”

“Sam.” you eyed the man next to you, waiting for him to reveal his opinion. He simply shrugged & motioned for Bucky to go ahead. Great. Back facing them, you took deep breaths to calm yourself down. Sometimes, you were so done with both of them.

“Why did you let him go in alone, Sam?” you started the conversation when Bucky was out of view.

“Because it was his idea in the first place.” he gestured.

“Sure & it was such an incredible idea that we didn’t even have to overthink it.” rolling your eyes, Sam kept staring at you in confusion.

“Wait…You said you had a history with Zemo.” Sam pieced everything together. At least he thought he did.

“So?”

“You didn’t like…fondue, did you?” Sam was careful while asking this question.

“Oh my God, could you not?” throwing your arms up, you covered your face with your hands. “No, we did not, Sam.”

“What kinda history do you two have then?” you could not even blame him for being curious. If you were in his position, you would ask the exact same question.

“It’s not important. Just…don’t bring it up again, okay? Please.” your (Y/E/C) eyes locked with his. The sincerity was shown through them. Whatever happened, Sam did not want to mess with you. After all, it looked like it really bothered you.

“What are you talking about you wanna break Zemo outta jail? Where the hell are we, Buck? Have you lost your mind?” the three of you were walking inside a barely lit room & Sam did not take the news of Bucky wanting Zemo’s help all too well. Was it the right time to tell him “I told you so.”? Whatever, you decided to keep it to yourself.

“We have no leads, no moves, nothing.” Bucky pointed out. Yeah, because you had not had enough time for research.

“Yeah, what we have is one of the most dangerous men of the world behind bars.” Sam clapped back.

“If you think Zemo is one of the most dangerous men then I’m really sorry for you, Wilson. Clearly you’ve never really met him.” your flashlight was not helping you to find your way through this room a lot.

“It depends, (Y/N)…” Bucky mumbled. “But we also have eight super soldiers on the loose.”

“Zemo is gonna mess with our minds. Especially yours. No offense. And (Y/N)? After our little talk, I don’t know what to think anymore.” Wilson looked into your eyes, as much as it was possible in the dark.

“Didn’t I tell you to not bring it up?” you growled out quietly.

“What are you talking about?” Bucky turned around to face you two. A shrug was enough to brush him off for now. Though, you expected more questions to follow soon. Finally, light illuminated the room & you could abandon your flashlights. “Super soldiers go against everything he believes in. He is crazy, but he still has a code.”

“Bold of you to assume that this man believes in anything, Buck.” looking around, it seemed like you were in some sort of a garage? You were not entirely sure.

“What (Y/N) said. I’ve been on the wrong side of that code, guys, & so have you.” Sam tried to talk some sense into Bucky but it was useless. “He blew up the U.N., he killed King T’Chaka & framed you for it, Bucky. Did you forget that? You think the Wakandans forgot about it?” he had a point. “It’s a rhetorical question. They didn’t. I know why this matters to you, but, come on, it’s pushing you off the deep end.”

“Sam, we don’t know how they’re gettin’ the serum. We don’t even know how many of them there are.”

“Because we haven’t had enough time to research.” you chimed in. “We just need some more time.”

“More time won’t change anything.” Bucky raised his voice slightly. Not enough for you to flinch back, though. “Look, let me just walk you through a hypothetical. Can I walk you through a hypothetical?”

“This doesn’t sound good.” you said at the same time as Sam spoke up.

“What did you do?”

“I didn’t do anything.” Bucky stated. Raising your eyebrows, you saw right through him.

“That’s his “I did something.” stare, Sam.” you leaned closer to him to whisper in his ear. Your voice got a little louder again. “So Bucky, tell us what you didn’t do, will ya?”

“The weakest point in any system isn’t the software, the hardware, it’s the meatware. The human element. Now, in this lockup, it’s nine to one, prisoners to guards. And if two prisoners start fighting, then the protocol says four guards have to respond.”

“So why would two prisoners randomly start fighting at that moment?” Sam asked another good question.

“If I’m being honest, I don’t think I even wanna know.” you shook your head & put your face into one of your hands.

“Who knows? There could be many reasons…” Bucky’s look left you with an uneasy feeling.

“Bucky.” you let out a warning growl. Whatever would follow, it would be everything but good.

“But the point is, these things escalate. Lockdown procedures would have to be initiated, & with all those bodies flying around left & right, wouldn’t be hard to slip down a hallway or two. And if the fire alarm got tripped while the prisoners were being separated…someone could use the chaos to their advantage.” Bucky finished.

“Um, I don’t know about you, but the fact that you could describe all of it so detailed without even having to stop for a second to think about your next words is truly scary.” your eyes rolled because deep down, you knew that this was not just hypothetical.

“I have to agree with (Y/N). This is unnatural. Are you…And where are we, man?” at least Sam was on your side this time. A door opening in the distance caught your attention. A threat? But before you could start your flames, a familiar face showed up. Oh no.

“Woah.” Sam breathed out, immediately going into fight mode.

“No, listen.” but Sam did not listen. You, on the other hand, tried to stay hidden behind the two men.

“What are you doin’ here?” really, Sam? Bucky literally told you like a minute ago. Sam went to attack but he was held back.

“I didn’t tell ‘cause I knew you guys wouldn’t let this happen.” damn right he was. You would have done everything to stop it.

“What did you do?” Sam’s voice got a few octaves higher.

“We need him, Sam.” scoffing quietly at that, you eyed the situation carefully. It was not part of your plan to meet him again. Not ever, for that matter.

“You’re going back to prison!” Sam was really heated right now, you could tell.

“If I may…” there was his voice. The one you had not heard in so long.

“NO!” Sam & Bucky yelled in union.

“Apologies.” you were pretty sure that they did not hear it. Slowly, you made your way out of your hiding spot. Zemo saw a dark figure approaching, silhouette way too familiar. His eyes widened at your sight. Nobody told him that you were here as well.

“(Y/N)?” his voice, barely above a whisper, broke the two arguing men out of their discussion.

“Zemo.” you nodded at him, feet dragging you closer to Bucky where you felt safe.

“Long time no see.” he stood his ground, sensing that you were uncomfortable. Because, unfortunately, he knew you better than you would have liked to admit.

“Not long enough.” you countered & he scoffed at you. “Hey Bucky?” he turned to you, that threatening smile on your face. The one everyone you were close to feared. “What the actual fuck?”

“(Y/N).” Bucky sighed in frustration. “Let me explain.”

“Sure thing, go ahead…”

“When Steve refused to sign the Sokovia Accords, you backed him. You broke the law & you stuck your neck out for me.” the super soldier made sure that his words reached the both of you.

“And I would do it again. As would Sam.” you answered without a second thought. Yet, his next words caught you off guard.

“I’m asking you to do it again.” Bucky’s voice got lower, signaling that he was serious about this.

“I didn’t mean it so figuratively, dude.” you desperately breathed out.

“I really think I’m invaluable…” but you gave Zemo no chance to finish whatever thought his sick brain had formed.

“Shut the fuck up.” you snarled through gritted teeth. His arms raised in defense.

“Okay.” Sam stated after a few seconds of silence.

“Okay? What do you mean “Okay.”?” you expected a lot of things but you definitely did not expect Sam to be okay with this. “It’s bad enough I have to work with you two children. But him? Don’t do this to me, guys.” you whined like you were a little child yourself. Sam rolled his eyes at your behavior.

“How kind of you, (Y/N).” Zemo sarcastically added.

“If we do this, you don’t make a move without our permission.” Wilson looked at him with that stare of his that usually made you shut up in an instant.

“Sam? You do know who you’re talking to, right?” one of your eyebrows raised.

“Yes, I do.”

“Good, just wanted to check.” your tight lipped smile did not need another comment.

“Okay, Zemo, where do we start?”

“(Y/N)?” Can we talk for a second?” Bucky dragged you away before you could give him a proper response. When he was sure that neither Sam nor Zemo could hear you anymore, he continued. “What’s going on?”

“Funny enough, I wanted to ask you the exact same question.” your sarcasm was more than obvious right now.

“You & Zemo?” his face was incredibly close to yours but not in a good way. No, he was mad at you even though you should be the one being mad at him.

“I didn’t help him break out, don’t you dare blame me now.” you shoved him back, not with much force, just enough so he stepped back.

“What kinda history do you have?” his voice was a little softer now, though you did not know why.

“There’s a reason I haven’t told you about any of this, Buck.” sighing exaggeratedly. “We have a history. So what? I don’t like him, okay? I don’t. Why do you care anyway?”

“So there was nothing between you two?”

“What the hell? No, of course not. Sam asking that? Okay, I get it. But you? Do you really think so little of me? Bucky, since when don’t you trust me?”

“It’s not that I don’t trust you. Just, you’ve only mentioned him to me a few times.”

“And I have damn good reasons why.” one of your hands made its way to Bucky’s shoulder in order to catch his attention. When his eyes met yours, you continued. “You have your demons to fight & I have mine. Don’t worry about me, I’ll be alright.” you wanted to turn around & head back to the others but his metal hand grabbed your wrist to stop you.

“You can talk to me, (Y/N). Whatever it is, I’m here for you, too.” a warm smile was enough for him to let you go. Motioning for Bucky to follow you, he trailed behind to go back to Sam & Zemo. Hopefully they had not killed each other yet.

“So our first move is grand theft auto?” Sam questioned when the four of you made your way into a big hall filled with cars. So many cars. Why the hell were there so many cars?

“These are mine. Collected by family over the generations.” Zemo explained. Sure thing. Sometimes you forgot that he was a Baron. “I spent years hunting people HYDRA recruited to recreate the serum. Right, (Y/N)?” he sent you a wink which made you roll your eyes. He pushed your buttons & he damn well knew it. Your heartrate picked up its pace, past memories were flooding your brain. The sudden headache made you stop in your tracks. Bucky turned around when he did not see you walking next to him anymore. He approached you, squeezed your shoulders & tried to get you to look up. It took a few moments but when your head snapped up, a small smile was plastered on your face. A tired one. Bucky could tell as well. Nodding briefly, you began walking again. This time, Bucky stayed close.

“Because once it’s out there, someone can create an army of people…” Zemo rummaged through one of his many cars, searching for God knew what. “…like the Avengers.”

“Remind me to kick your ass if you keep making these pauses for dramatical effect.” Sam & Bucky scoffed at your little threat.

“Almost feels like the good old days, doesn’t it?” he made his way over to you. Instinctively, you scooted closer to Bucky’s side. Getting the message, he wrapped one of his arms around your middle. “I ended the Winter Soldier program once before. I have no intention to leave my work unfinished. Not like I left yours, (Y/N).” he teased. Your jaw clenched & you tried your hardest to keep your comments to yourself.

“Can you just cut to the chase?” Bucky spoke up with his deep voice. Zemo looked at you guys & explained further.

“To do this, we’ll have to scale a ladder of lowlifes.”

“We’ll join the party. We’ve already started.” Sam joined the conversation.

“First stop is a woman named Selby. Mid-level fence I still have a line on. From there, we climb.” Zemo walked away, ignoring you entirely. Glancing between Sam & Bucky, you noticed that they were on board with whatever Zemo had planned.

“Oh. Okay. Great.” mumbling out, you followed Zemo & left the others alone. You hated everything about this.

Zemo led you to an airport. Sort of. His private jet. Yes, apparently his Baron title meant a big deal. As an Avenger, you did not even have things similar to what he had. Not that you were complaining. It sure as hell fed his ego, though. Especially with this coat of his that made him look like he really was important.

“So all this time you’ve been rich?” Sam gestured with his arms. Gesturing to the huge ass plane right in front of you.

“I’m a Baron, Sam.” because he could not see you, you mimicked his words in a teasing manner. Bucky noticed & tried to hide his laugh with a cough. Without luck. Zemo did not seem to mind. “My family was royalty until your friends destroyed my country.”

“Aw, bummer.” you joked which earned you a death glare from him. Zemo greeted the man waiting for you in Russian. Some words you understood. You grew up with HYDRA, after all.

“Please.” Zemo motioned for you all to follow him inside the plane. Truthfully, you had a bad feeling about this. Somehow, the blind trust Sam & Bucky placed in him left you angry. They knew what he was capable of.

“By the way, I think it’s not fair that I have to sit opposite of him.” your finger pointed to Zemo but your words were directed at Sam & Bucky. The Baron chuckled at you.

“Apologies if that’s a little warm, the fridge is out.” was it his butler? He was now. “But I will see if there is some good food in the galley.” these really were first world problems. Not. Zemo answered something in Sokovian. Something that even made you laugh.

“Wait…What did he say?” Bucky asked you with wide eyes.

“He just confessed that he would like to have your hair, Buck.” Zemo did not correct you but simply chuckled at your words.

“You don’t know what it’s like to be locked in a cell. Oh. That’s right. You do. (Y/N)?” he eyed you, looking at you expectantly.

“What is it my dear Baron?” you rolled your eyes when you answered him.

“Oh, I get all giddy when you call me that…You know, we need to talk.”

“Oh, do we now?” tilting your head, you hoped he would not keep talking. You knew how this would end.

“Maybe not in their company.” he shrugged his shoulders.

“Maybe not at all.” you snapped back with venom in your voice. If he did not stop talking then you would make him shut up. Luckily, Sam came to your aid.

“Why don’t you tell us about where we’re going?” took him long enough to ask that. Hell, you were already on your way.

“I’m sorry. I was just fascinated by this.” Zemo opened a book, focusing on whatever words he was reading. “I don’t know what to call it, but this part seems to be important. Who is Nakajima?” immediately, you jumped up & ripped the small book out of his hands. Handing it to Bucky, you silently checked if he was alright. A small nod confirmed that he was. For now. Your face got closer to Zemo’s.

“You do something like that again & I’ll castrate you with my bare hands. Flames included.” his eyes got a little wider in fear. He had respect but he did not want to show it. “Got it?” he nodded frantically & you shoved him back into his chair, sitting down yourself.

“I’m sorry.” well, at least he was apologizing. Whether he meant it or not did not matter. “I understand that list of names. People you’ve wronged as the Winter Soldier.”

“Don’t push it.” Bucky warned him.

“I’ve seen that book.” Sam joined the conversation. “It was Steve’s when he came out of the ice. I told him about Trouble Man. He wrote it in that book. Did you hear it? What’d you think?” risking a glance at Bucky, he looked outside of the window. Seemingly done with everything right now. Similar emotions were rushing through you.

“I like ‘40s music, so…”

“Oh, stop it, Buck. I’ve seen you throwing it down to Beyoncé.” you teased. Sam & Zemo laughed while Bucky only scoffed.

“I don’t mind Beyoncé.” he defended himself.

“You didn’t like Trouble Man?” Sam acted as if the world was ending. Again.

“I liked it.” he countered.

“It is a masterpiece, James. Complete. Comprehensive.” because apparently, Zemo thought everyone cared about his opinion. “It captures the African-American experience.”

“He’s out of line, but he’s right.” Sam had to admit. “It’s great. Everybody loves Marvin Gaye.”

“True.” you added quietly.

“I like Marvin Gaye.” Bucky confessed.

“But?” you asked.

“No but.” the super soldier breathed out.

“Steve adored Marvin Gaye.” Sam was right. The thought brought back a lot of memories.

“You must have really looked up to Steve.” Zemo really was one to push buttons.

“Zemo. Shut it.” your warning growl was deep.

“You’re very protective over James, (Y/N).” he noted.

“So what? You jealous?” you asked, your tone teasing. He simply shook his head & let the topic die. Bucky eyed you carefully when you talked to Zemo. It was true, you were protective whenever it came to him. But that was your personality, right? That was what he told himself. Zemo directed the conversation to Steve again.

“I realized something when I met him. The danger with people like him, America’s super soldiers, is that we put them on pedestals.”

“Watch your step, Zemo.” Sam’s warning would not change anything. After all, you had tried before.

“They become symbols. Icons.” Zemo did not stop. “And then we start to forget about their flaws. From there, cities fly, innocent people die. Movements are formed, wars are fought. You remember that, right?” his words were directed at Bucky. Your hand was held out for him to grab. While he eyed it, he did not take it. So you retreated it again. Probably too many people here to watch, you figured. “As a young soldier sent to Germany to stop a mad icon. Do we want to live in a world full of people like the Red Skull? That is why we’re going to Madripoor.” huh, Madripoor. You had never heard of that before. Was it stupid to follow Zemo there? Most definitely.

“What’s up with Madripoor? You guys talk about it like it’s Skull Island.” sometimes you really appreciated Sam for keeping the cool during such situations. You let your emotions drive your actions most of the time. Something you needed to improve, you knew that.

“It’s an island nation in the Indonesian archipelago.” looked like Bucky knew about this place. “It was a pirate sanctuary back in the 1800s.”

“It’s kept its lawless ways.” your head turned to stare at Zemo again. Lawless? Great. “But we cannot exactly walk in as ourselves. James, you will have to become someone you claim is gone.” glancing between him & Bucky, you scoffed in hopes that this was a big joke.

“No. No, no, no. Bucky, you won’t go with that, right?” but he only shot you a sympathetic smile. Sam only shrugged. Well, apparently all the guys were against you.

“(Y/N). I expect you will not be happy about the role you have to play.” Zemo’s eyes bore into yours. They held something that left you uneasy. “You will have to become my partner in order to not blow up our cover.” please, let him be joking. The seriousness showed you that he was not. Bucky beat you to speaking up.

“Not gonna happen. Don’t even think about it.”

“Funny how (Y/N) doesn’t want you to play the Winter Soldier & you don’t want her to be my pretend-wife.”

“Guess what, Zemo? I don’t wanna be your pretend-wife.”

“I guess you don’t have much choice.” Zemo stated with a certainty. He was right. You hated it but he was right. A look at Sam & Bucky was enough. It was set. Zemo’s plan was about to happen.

Madripoor was colorful. If it were not for the fact that they lived without any laws here, you would have enjoyed it. Sam changed into a red suit, pretending to be someone called Smiling Tiger. Bucky pretended to be the Winter Soldier. Zemo’s clothes were the same. You wore a beautiful gown that matched Zemo’s colors. It hugged your every curve perfectly. The moment the super soldier first saw you in it took his breath away. You were drop dead gorgeous. Every day, actually. But in this dress? Damn, he was at a loss of words. The four of you walked the streets just like that. In this country, nobody cared. Nobody noticed.

“We have to do something about this. I’m the only one who looks like a pimp.” Sam complained about his outfit.

“I don’t know, I think people will dig that.” you nudged him with your elbow. This earned you a light groan & a laugh.

“Only an American would assume a fashion-forward Black man looks like a pimp.” sometimes, you thought Zemo tried everything to sound intellectual. Tried was the word. “You look exactly like the man you’re supposed to be playing. The sophisticated, charming African rake named Conrad Mack, aka the Smiling Tiger.”

“Sophisticated & charming.” you chuckled. “Not words I’d use to describe you, Wilson.” Sam rolled his eyes at you.

“Smiling Tiger. He even has a bad nickname.” Sam complained. But when he looked at the picture Zemo had shown him, he realized why he had to play pretend to be that guy. “Hell, he does look like me, though.”

“Show me.” Sam held the picture in front of your face. “Damn, you sure that’s not you? Secret identity, maybe?” you wiggled your brows & earned a playful slap from Sam.

“(Y/N), you cannot act like this here.” Zemo held your wrist to make you stop in your tracks. “You are supposed to be the Baron’s dame. Let your guard down & this mission will be for nothing.” usually, you did not care about other people’s opinions. Therefore, Zemo’s words did not affect you at all. Bucky pulled you away from him & shot him a stern stare.

“Stop. Threatening. Her.” Bucky growled. “She’s not new to this job. She knows the way.” Zemo’s hands raised & he took a step back, signaling that he would not do this again.

“You smell this?” Zemo spoke up all of a sudden.

“Yeah, what is that? Acid?” Sam asked curiously.

“Madripoor.” wow, what a great answer. Now you knew so much more. You had a lot of sarcastic comebacks but you decided to keep your comments to yourself. “No matter what happens, we have to stay in character. (Y/N).” Zemo held his hand out for you to take. Rolling your eyes, you grabbed it. His body pulled closer to yours & you wished it would be Bucky who held you close. It would make everything a lot easier. Plastering on a big, fake smile, you tried your hardest to be what he wanted you to be. His dame. You would kill him later, for sure. A car approached you & the four of you got in. Zemo, pretending to be the gentleman, opened the door for you & helped you in. His hands holding your hip in place. He was so dead. After this mission, you would so kill him. His smirk showed you that he knew exactly what he was doing.

Nope. You did not like this town. At all. Loud music. Drugs everywhere. Scary people wherever you looked. And to top everything off, you had to pretend to be utterly in love with Zemo. Now that you were thinking about it, you would have preferred talking to him instead of this whole undercover thing. The four of you found yourselves in the Princess Bar. The name itself would have been repulsive enough for you. But it was all for the job. All to get the job done. Zemo started speaking in Russian. You understood most of it. Someone close to you whispered something about the Winter Soldier being here. They knew him. Of course. People like them did know him. You made your way over to the bar. Your body being uncomfortably close to Zemo’s. Bucky had a role to play but you knew him better than that. Something behind his eyes told you that he hated this as much as you did. Not just him pretending to be the killer he had once been but also you having to play the Baroness.

“Hello gentlemen, m’lady. Wasn’t expecting you, Smiling Tiger.” the bartender greeted you.

“His plans changed. We have business to do with Selby.” Zemo explained.

“The usual?” obviously, the question referred to your drinks of choice. Unsure how to answer, you let the guys do the talking. In the corner of your eyes, you noticed Sam nodding. Bucky kept his composure. Your eyes widened when the bartender grabbed a very much alive & moving snake from a jar, put it down on the counter & went straight to cutting it open. It took everything in you to not gag but you had to act like none of this faced you.

“Ah.” you assumed Zemo wanted to ease the tension. “Smiling Tiger, your favorite.” oh no, poor Sam. You averted your gaze from the scene in front of you. Instead, your eyes bore into the side profile of the man hugging you close.

“I love these.” Sam commented, referring to the drink in his hand. If all of this was over, you would tease the shit out of him. Now was not the right timing, though.

“Cheers, Conrad.” Zemo clinked his glass with Wilson, then moved on to you. Honestly, you had no idea what kind of liquid your glass held. You knew better than to ask questions. Fingers crossed Sam could down his drink without making it look suspicious. Someone tapped your shoulder. An action which made you turn around. Zemo turned around as well, squeezing your hips as he did so. He was walking on very thin ice. Yet, your smile not even once faltered.

“I got word from up high.” the man talking to you was scary. It would not have bothered you as much if you knew you could use your powers. “You ain’t welcome here.”

“I have no business with the Power Broker, but if he insists, he can either come & talk to me…” he then gestured to Bucky who stood close by, jaw clenched. It had to be hard for him. After all, he wanted to erase the Winter Soldier from his mind. He was the main cause of his nightmares. Zemo would regret his decision to play pretend once you could let your guard down. “Or bring Selby for a chat.” that seemed to do the job. The man left you guys alone again.

“A power broker? Really?” Bucky questioned.

“Every kingdom needs its king.” you had to keep your comment about him killing King T’Chaka to yourself. “Let’s just pray we stay under his radar.”

“Do you know him?” Sam chimed in.

“Only by reputation. In Madripoor he is judge, jury, & executioner.” suddenly, Zemo began talking in Russian, clearly addressing Bucky. All you could make out was that he was supposed to attack. No. No, no, no. But it was too late. Bucky went straight into action. Fighting his way through the bar. People surrounding you screamed. Some of them put their phones out & you would have loved to just burn the place down. If these videos ever make it to the States? Only the Gods knew what it would do to Bucky. It kind of scared you that the super soldier could pretend so easily. Though, you knew that deep down, he hated every single second of it. With his entire heart. No matter what, you had to talk to him about this later.

“I will kill you for this.” you whispered into Zemo’s ear. A gentle smile on your face when you pulled away again. A smirk was the only response you got.

“Didn’t take much for him to fall back into form.” he winked at you. Your jaw clenching was the only way to show how incredibly angry you were. Guns around you started clicking & you turned around only to be met with tons of people circling you. Zemo pulled you closer once again. His next words were directed at you & Sam.

“Stay in character or the whole bar turns on us.” what a reassuring thing. Zemo praised Bucky in Russian.

“Selby will see you now.” the bartender gave you an approving nod.

“Thank you.” the Baron said. Bucky let go of the person he had held down only a second ago.

“Are you okay?” you could not help but ask, of course only in a whisper. Bucky would not meet your eyes & just let out a deep breath. Maybe he would give you a proper answer later on.

“You should know, Baron.” the woman who you assumed to be Selby spoke up. “People don’t just come into my bar & make demands.”

“Not a demand. An offer.” he made it obvious to grab your hand & intertwine his fingers with yours. You offered the best heart eyes you could muster.

“A lot has changed since you were here last. Who’s that lovely lady by your side?” she eyed you up & down.

“My Baroness.” Zemo kept it simple, thank the Gods. At least one move you were alright with. Your warm smile made her smile in return.

“By the way, I thought you were rotting away in a German prison. How did you escape?” excellent question. You knew someone who could recall the story very detailed. Zemo sat on a chair & pulled you on his lap. Your jaw clenched but you would not let your smile fall. You did notice Bucky staring at you closely. Shooting him a quick glance, you hoped it was enough to let him know that you were fine but that you were not liking it one bit.

“People like us always find a way, don’t we? Darling?” he squeezed your hip, motioning for you to answer as well. The nickname he gave you? Oh, he would so get punched later.

“Most definitely, my Baron.” a soft kiss was planted on your cheek & you saw red. By the way Bucky’s fist clenched, it was obvious that he was slowly losing his temper.

“I’m sure you’ve already figured out what I’m here for.” his eyes directed to Selby.

“You’re taller than I’d heard, Smiling Tiger.” she did not even look at Sam, yet her words were meant to reach him. “What’s the offer?”

“Tell us what you know about the super-soldier serum.” Zemo did not waste any more time. He gently moved you off of him & got up, walking over to where Bucky stood. “And I give you him, along with the code words to control him, of course. He will do anything you want.” one of his hands brushed along Bucky’s chin & if it were not for the part you were playing, you would have punched him in his face. Flames added & all.

“Now that’s the Zemo I remember.” Selby seemed totally on board with that deal. “I’m glad I decided not to kill you immediately.” damn, she wanted to kill him back in the days? Why the hell did she not? “Yeah, you were right to come to me. Arrogant, but right.” again, Zemo sat back down, pulling you close to his body. And you could do nothing but obey. “The super-soldier serum is here in Madripoor. Dr. Wilfred Nagel is the man you wanna thank. Or…condemn, depending on what side of this you’re on. The Power Broker had him working on the serum, but…things didn’t go as planned.”

“Is Nagel still in Madripoor?” Zemo wanted to know.

“Oh. The bread crumbs you can have for free, but the bakery is gonna cost you, Baron.” great, so that was not going the way you thought it would. “And before you get all cute, don’t think you can find Nagel without me.”

A cell phone vibrating caught everyone’s attention. Looking over to Sam, you realized that it was his. Shit. Whoever was calling him did not know about this little undercover mission. Selby demanded him to answer it & Sam had no choice but to. On speaker, of course. It was Sarah. Wilson’s sister. No matter how hard Sam tried, in the end, it blew your cover. Selby got shot the second she ordered to kill you all. Confusion washed over you, Zemo pushed you behind him. Bucky was right there & covered your body with his, making sure nobody had a clear sight on you. Though you had him protecting you, something hard hit the back of your head & you were soon embraced in darkness.

“So what the hell happened to her?” you could make out a female voice. It sounded familiar but you could not quite tell who it belonged to. Your eyelids were too heavy & it was a struggle to open them. Yet, you kept trying. After all, you still were not sure if your were safe or not. Last time you checked, you were in danger with people pointing their guns at you. How you got here? Somewhere inside on a couch? No clue. Groaning slightly, you found it hard to move. Finally opening your eyes, you were met with a certain super soldier smiling down at you. Wait a second. Were you laying in Bucky’s lap? Thank the Gods your head was killing you still or you would have been embarrassed to be in this position.

“Good morning, doll. You okay?” when the others noticed Bucky talking to you, they moved over to where you were. When you struggled sitting up, the super soldier went to help you. One of his arms stayed around your body. Looking around the room, you saw Sam, Zemo & Sharon staring at you. Sharon? What?

“Sharon?” your eyes widened, she simply shot you a warm smile.

“Nice to see you again, (Y/N).” she nodded at you.

“Um, what-where…how…okay. What the fuck?” Sam & Bucky chuckled at your confused state.

“I saved your asses. Well, not entirely. Bucky saved your ass & then I found you guys & then I saved your asses.” Sharon explained.

“Some asshole punched his gun against your head. Buck picked you up & we ran outta there. Now we’re here.” Sam joined in. Nodding in understanding, you thanked Sharon first, then looked over at Bucky & smiled brightly. That was enough for him to know that you were thankful.

“And Zemo’s still alive?” you teased, raising your eyebrows.

“For now.” Sharon mumbled & you broke out in laughter.

“No, wait. I told him I’d kill him. Please let me do it.” you eyed the Baron who simply sat there in silence, observing the conversation from afar.

“What’s going on, Sharon? You don’t ever wanna come back home?” Sam asked while picking out an outfit to wear.

“We miss you.” you simply stated.

“They’ll lock me up if I step foot back in the States.” well, she had a point but that did not have to happen. “Madripoor doesn’t allow extradition.”

“Look, I’m sorry I didn’t call, but after the Blip & the chaos, I just…” Sharon interrupted his rambling.

“Look, you know the whole hero thing is a joke, right? I mean, the way you gave up that shield, deep down, you must know it’s all hypocrisy.”

“He knows. And not so deep down.” for the first time since you woke up, Zemo spoke up. Nobody had asked him but you did not want to tell him that. All you did was sending him a death stare.

“Sharon. I did call. You never picked up.” you looked over from the couch to where she & Sam stood.

“I know you called.”

“Oh, okay. Great.” you mumbled, head hanging low.

“It wasn’t exactly easy, (Y/N). If there was a chance, I would’ve called back. You know that, right?” her eyes met yours & behind them, you saw the sincerity. A short nod was enough to drop the conversation for now. “By the way, how is the new Cap?”

“Oh my…please don’t ever mention that asshole again.” groaning, you put your head into your hands.

“Don’t get me started.” Bucky added. Sharon scoffed at your responses.

“Please. You buy into all that stars & stripes bullshit.” she walked over to her couch where Bucky & you were still sitting close to each other. “Before you were his pet psychopath, you were Mr. America! Cap’s best friend.”

“Wow. She’s kind of awful now.” Bucky leaned closer to your ear & whispered to you. Chuckling quietly, you clapped back a little.

“Not cool, Sharon. I’m being serious.” she rolled her eyes at you. A smirk formed on your face. You knew she was joking, but still.

“Karli Morgenthau & at least seven others have taken the serum.” Sam fixed the shirt he just put on.

“You guys really should steer clear of all of this for your own safety.” Sharon shook her head.

“We know it’s a risk, but we won’t leave until we find the one who cracked the code.”

“We got a name. Wilfred Nagel.” the super soldier followed.

“Nagel works for the Power Broker.” Sharon got up & walked across the room.

“We need your help, Sharon.” Sam admitted. “I can get your name cleared.”

“You haggling with my life?” she poured herself a drink. A drink would do you some good, too. But because of the headache you were still experiencing, you decided to not ask for one.

“Not like that.” Sam’s eyes softened.

“I don’t buy that. You pretending like you can clear my name. (Y/N)’s name got cleared because of what now? Oh, right. Because nobody knows she used to work for HYDRA. Because nobody has read her file. Imagine if things were different. What would her situation be like, huh?”

“Thanks for dragging me into this convo, Sharon.” a tight lipped smile was sent her way. Bucky placed his hand on your shoulder & squeezed a little.

“I wasn’t all that involved in clearing (Y/N)’s name. She did most of it herself.” Sam made sure to add & you showed your gratitude by a small but present smile. “Okay, maybe it is hypocrisy. Maybe you’re right. What happened to you. But I’m willing to try if you are. They cleared the bionic staring machine, & he killed almost everybody he’s met.”

“Damn, Wilson. You’re getting better with nicknames. If you keep going like that, I will have to start a small book & write them all down.” you joked. Even Bucky chuckled. Not much but still.

“I don’t trust charity.” Sharon ignored your little banter.

“Alright, a deal then.” Sam really cared about her otherwise he would have stopped trying to convince Sharon by now.  “You help us out, & I get your name cleared.” it took her a few moments but eventually, she shook hands with Wilson. So you had her on your side. Almost like the good old times.

“Well, I sell to some pretty connected people.” right, because apparently, you were unconscious when Sharon showed the guys around her art exhibition? That was what you made out. Though you had no idea what exactly they were talking about. “Lay low. Blend in. Enjoy the party. Try to stay outta trouble. I’ll see what I can find.”

“(Y/N)?” Zemo asked when Sharon exited the room. Bucky visibly tensed beside you. Clearly, he wanted to keep him as far away from you as possible. Especially after what happened at Selby’s. Bucky blamed Zemo for you getting hurt. Because if the super soldier was close to you, you would not have to deal with a pretty bad headache right now.

“What, Zemo?” you snarled.

“I asked you earlier today. Can we talk?”

“No.” Bucky answered so quickly, you barely had time to register the question.

“I believe the lady can speak for herself.” Zemo stood up, holding his hand out for you to take. Shooting Bucky a quick glance, your eyes told him that you would be fine.

“The lady can. You got five minutes.” ignoring his hand, you got up yourself, stopping briefly to get used to the feeling of standing. Your head was pulsing. Bucky went to steady you by holding onto your waist. When the dark spots blurring your vision disappeared, you assured Bucky that you were okay. His titled head showed his uncertainty. Nevertheless, he let you go.

Zemo & you were outside on a balcony. The chill air of Madripoor around you. Propping your arms on the railing, you waited for him to speak up. It was him who wanted to talk to you.

“I am sorry.” his voice was quiet but loud enough for you to snap your head into his direction. Zemo. Apologizing? Maybe you were dreaming. “For not being cautious enough back there. And for what happened all those years ago.” you scoffed, averting your gaze again.

“Thanks for your apology.” your words were filled with sarcasm.

“I do mean it, (Y/N).” you could feel his eyes staring at you.

“Zemo.” you sighed. “What happened at Selby’s wasn’t your fault. It could’ve happened to all of us. And what you did back then…well, I think your apology comes a little too late. It’s in here, you know?” your finger pointed to your head, signaling that you meant it was a memory.

“What I did was wrong.”

“Took you a long time to figure that one out. It doesn’t matter anyway. You trapped me. Failed to extract my blood correctly to get to my special serum. And not in a way that was pleasant might I add.”

“And for that I truly am sorry.” his body turned towards yours. By now, you were looking straight into his eyes.

“I don’t hate you if that’s what you’re worried about. It’s not like I can change what happened. Will I ever stop disliking you? Highly unlikely. But I’m too tired to feel hatred. I’m too tired for revenge. I’m not the person I used to be. The girl who worked for HYDRA? She would’ve killed you without a second thought. Me? I’m far past killing when it’s not necessary. I know what it does to a person. So, thanks for apologizing, Zemo. Let’s just keep this simple, alright? We’re working together. That’s it. I don’t have to like you to do that & I don’t need your pity. Because this problem....” you gestured between the two of you. “Is in the past. And I’d highly appreciate it if you didn’t mention it to the others. Understood?” Zemo’s nod was your sign to head back inside, leaving him on the balcony alone. It was good to talk about it. Now you just hoped that Zemo would keep his mouth shut. After this mission, you would go your separate ways again. Nothing more, nothing less.

“You sure you’re okay?” Bucky walked over to you, making sure that you two were alone.

“I’m fine, Buck.” you breathed out. “Headache is almost gone. Give me another hour & I’ll be good to go.”

“I’m not talking about your head.” he sat down next to you, his arms on his knees.

“Why, thanks for your concern.” you chuckled sarcastically.

“No, I mean…Of course I care about your well-being but I know you well enough that a little hit on your head won’t kill you. Though I gotta admit that you scared me a bit back there.”

“Is that so?” your eyebrows raised, your head turning to your side.

“What I’m trying to say is…Zemo didn’t do anything, did he?” his eyes showed concern.

“He just wanted to apologize for what happened back at Selby’s.” it was not a lie. Not the entire truth either but enough for now.

“When you’re ready to tell me everything, you know where to find me. I won’t pressure you to do anything you’re uncomfortable with. Come here.” he opened his arms & you gladly accepted his offer. So he saw through you. As he usually did. Maybe you would tell him what Zemo did all those years ago. Maybe when you were not as busy as right now. It was Bucky. He would never judge you. The exact opposite, actually. You were sure that he would help you through it. Because sharing your burdens made the weight lighter. In the future. That was what you told yourself. After everything decided to calm down a little more.

Again. Loud music. And it did not really help your head at all. Your headache had pretty much disappeared but the bass made it harder to keep it that way. Everyone around you was dancing, drinking alcohol & doing drugs. No, this was not your world. Zemo actually seemed to fit in quite well. You stood on the side, right next to Bucky. Mainly because he did not leave you out of his sight. Not after what Zemo pulled earlier.

“(Y/N), look.” Sam nudged you with his elbow. “Your husband has some moves. Damn.” he pointed over to the Baron who was throwing it down on the dancefloor.

“Could you please not call him my husband? It was hard enough not to kick him in the balls when he was all like “Oh, look at my Baroness.”. I still can’t believe I agreed on playing his pretend-wife.” you shook your head at the memory that was still so freshly present in your mind.

“I found it hilarious.” Sam admitted.

“Yeah? You know what I found hilarious?” Wilson motioned for you to continue. “When that bartender cut open the snake to put God knows what into your favorite drink.” Bucky & you laughed when Sam gagged at the drink he had to down.

“How was it like?” Bucky asked all of a sudden.

“How was what like?” your eyebrows furrowed.

“Pretending to be his wife.” there was something behind his eyes. Something you would describe as rage or maybe even…jealousy? Was he jealous? Deep down you hoped so.

“Like the worst nightmare ever.” that seemed to ease the tension a little, fortunately.

“Hey, guys. I found him.” Sharon joined you again.

“Here we go.” Sam eyed you & the four of you followed her.

It looked like you were at a harbor. Many containers. Whoever this guy was, he sure as hell did a great job with hiding here.

“Madripoor could give New York a run for its money.” Sam noted & you nodded at him.

“They know how to party.” Zemo added.

“With that bounty on your head, the longer you’re in Madripoor, the less likely you’re ever leaving.” Sharon kept looking at her phone for directions. Another thing you had found out was that after Selby was killed, there had been put a huge bounty on your head.

“What a comforting thing to say, Sharon.” you remarked with a hint of sarcasm & desperation.

“Welcome to Madripoor, (Y/N).” she met your eyes briefly, then added. “Alright. He’s in there. Container four-two-six-one” she gestured to a container that looked exactly like every other one around here. “I’ll keep an eye while you guys talk to Nagel. But hurry. We’re on burrowed time.” she handed each of you a little piece to put into your ear. That way, you were all connected together.

“Wait, wait, wait. Isn’t it better if I stayed with Sharon? I mean, It’s better to have two people out here, right?” you questioned.

“Not gonna happen.” Bucky grabbed your wrist to pull you closer to him. “You’re staying with me.”

“Your overprotective boyfriend’s right, (Y/N). I can handle myself just fine, trust me. You go talk to Nagel.” you rolled your eyes at her for calling Bucky your boyfriend.

“Aw, overprotective boyfriend. That’s cute.” Wilson joined the teasing. Of course he did.

“I hate you all so much.” you went ahead & approached the container, leaving the others behind. Bucky only clenched his jaw & shot Sam a look. One that made him snort. Then, he trailed behind you, making sure you were not too far away from where he was. So what? Maybe he was protective. It was not a bad thing. Besides, he saw what happened when he did not pay attention. No way in hell would he let you get into such a dangerous situation again. He actually told you to stay behind. After all, you were still hurt. Kind of. But you reassured him that you were fine. And they needed you.

Sam opened the heavy door, revealing a dark container.

“Hey, Sharon. You sure this is the right one?” Wilson asked. “It’s completely empty.”

“This looks like a trap, guys.” you noted.

“It has to be the right one. No trap.” Sharon told you over the coms. So you all entered. Staying behind a bit, you made sure to check the door. Just in case. If someone was about to trap you in, you would notice soon enough to stop it. Zemo turned on a flashlight, bringing a tiny bit of light inside the dark room. Was it a room? Container. Whatever, it did not exactly matter. Sam & Zemo checked out its entirety. Bucky & you still at the door. You heard something & saw the Baron pushing against the back of the container. A secret door. You should have guessed that. You pulled out your gun & followed them. Sam was first, then Zemo, then you & last but not least Bucky. That way, he could keep you in his sight. Music could be heard once you walked up the stairs. Yes, this looked like a lab. Gun at ready, you made sure it was clear. Bucky signaled you to stay behind him & you obeyed. If your were honest, you did not really feel safe without him around. So staying close to him was your preferred choice anyway. At the end of the room, a man was totally in his element, failing to notice your presence. Sam & Bucky nodded at each other, having another silent conversation. Then, they approached the man. You went ahead & stopped his music. That gained his attention. He turned around & faced you.

“Dr. Nagel?” Sam was the first to speak.

“Who are you? What do you want?” if this was the guy you were looking for then con-fucking-grats. He looked like he was insane.

“We know you created the super-soldier serum.”

“Get out of my lab.” he ordered but you stood your place. It took more for you to leave than such a little threat. Hell, it was not even a threat.

“I’m afraid we can’t do that, Doc.” your gun was still raised, not yet knowing the possible danger you were in. He went to walk away but stopped dead in his tracks when his eyes fell on Bucky.

“You know who he is, right?” Sam grabbed his arm to hold him in place. “This is Baron Zemo. And this…” he turned him so he had to look at you. “This is (Y/N). I know you’ve heard of her too, right?” as a form of greeting, you moved your fingers where blue sparks started forming. His eyes widened when he noticed. A smirk was making its way onto your face. Good thing if he was scared of you. “You seem like a pretty smart guy. So you better become conversational real quick.”

“How about a counter proposal?” that made your eyebrows raise. He was outmanned & he had the audacity to suggest that? Okay, strong move. “Make me a better offer & I’ll talk.” Sharon let you know that you had company. Maybe you should have stayed with her. Bucky noticed you wanting to move but his arm wrapped around your middle, holding you in place.

“No.” he whispered sternly & you rolled your eyes in annoyance. When you saw the look that he gave you, your gaze went down. No arguing with him, it seemed. Bucky then let you go & pushed Nagel onto a chair, gun pointing at his head. When he still did not start talking, Bucky gave a warning shot, right beside his head.

“Okay. Okay.” the doctor gave in. “I was brought into HYDRA’s Winter Soldier program to pick up their work after the five failed test subjects in Siberia. When HYDRA fell, I was recruited by the CIA. They had blood samples from an American test subject with semi-stable traces of serum in his system.” he was talking about Isaiah. “After much labor, I was able to isolate the necessary compounds in his blood.”

“Zemo? Maybe you should let him teach you how to successfully do that.” you mumbled, leaning a tiny bit closer to the Baron.

“Shut up.” he spat out, though there was something playful in his tone. Sam & Bucky looked at you confused but you simply brushed them off by a wave of your hand.

“I was a God.” he finished.

“Not really a Thor-like kinda guy but whatever helps you sleep at night.” you could not help but comment. The doctor then looked at you, clearly not pleased by what you said.

“I did what no other scientist since Erskine was able to do. But mine was going to be different. No clunky machines or jacked up bodies. Mine was going to be subtle, optimized, perfect.”

“How have we never heard about this?” excellent question, Sam. You had no clue.

“Because…Before I was able to complete my work, I turned to dust.”

“How unfortunate.” you rolled your eyes. Bucky silently told you to keep your comments to yourself. He only did that because he was concerned about you & did not want to risk anything. Nagel ignored you anyway.

“Then when I returned, it was five years later, the program had been abandoned, so I came here. The Power Broker was more than happy to fund the recreation of my work.”

“How many vials did you make?” Wilson kept asking the really important questions here.

“Twenty.” oh, awesome. “Karli Morgenthau stole those, so…I can only imagine what the Power Broker has planned for that poor girl.”

“Where’s Karli now?” you all silently agreed on letting Sam do the talking.

“I don’t know where she is.” oh, even more awesome. “But a couple of days ago, she called & asked if I could help someone named Donya Madani. Poor woman has tuberculosis. Typical of overpopulation in displacement camps like that.”

“Well, what happened to her?”

“Not my pig. Not my farm.”

“Is there any serum in this lab?” finally, Bucky asked a question. The gun pointed at the doctor’s head again when he did not answer right away.

“No.”

“And we’re just supposed to believe you?” you crossed your arms over your chest.

“If you believe me or not is none of my business.”

“Now what?” Bucky directed his words at you three. Shrugging your shoulders, you waited for the others to come up with a plan.

“Guys, we’re seriously outta time here.” you were surprised to see Sharon running in. Bruises were adorning her face. Whatever had happened out there, it was not pretty. The next thing you heard was a gunshot & when you looked over, you saw Zemo pointing a gun at a now dead Nagel. How the hell did he even get a gun?

“No!” Sam screamed. It was too late. Zemo was pushed against a wall by Wilson.

“What did you do?” Sharon breathed out, out of breath from her previous fights you assumed she had. The room around you exploded & you tried your best to shield your head with your arms. Bucky’s reflexes were faster than yours & he wrapped his arms around your form, his entire body keeping as much of the explosion from you as possible.

“You okay?” you did not hear his words but you read the question off of his lips. The ringing in your ears was almost too much. The headache that had faded, now being back worse than before. The lab would soon experience another explosion & the super soldier wasted no time in helping you get up. When your legs almost gave out, he picked you up bridal style & rushed out of the container with you in his arms. Your body was still weakened. But you had no time to think about the pain. There were people here who wanted you dead & you had to fight them. Whether you liked it or not.

“Alright! Wait for my signal!” Bucky yelled over the noises around you. Your hands were covered in blue flames, ready to attack. Ready to use your powers if needed. Fun fact: nobody waited for Bucky’s signal. Sam went off, shooting.

“Damn it. (Y/N), stay behind!” you were too focused to talk so you simply nodded. Hiding behind one of the containers. Still, you shot your gun. By now, you had realized that your powers were not really useful. Not in this moment. Your gun had to do. Your ears had not stopped ringing. The gunshots blazing around you did not help much after that explosion.

“Are you like living here?” Sam screamed, directing it at Sharon.

“It’s not terrible.” she answered in a haze.

“Oh, it’s lovely.” your usual sarcasm was back. You were running short on ammo & if you did not wrap this up quickly, you would actually have to use your powers.

“I thought we were going left?” the super soldier said through gritted teeth.

“You went the wrong way!” Sam shot back.

“I was clearing the way!”

“I came out first. You had to follow me.”

“And where are we now?”

“Guys, now’s not the time!” you ended their bickering right away. Tried to.

“This is a barricade.”

“It’s in every action movie!”

“If you don’t shut up right now…I swear I will pull a fucking Tom Cruise on you!” your voice was now at the same volume as theirs. That seemed to do the job. Children. You were working with freaking children. It was not even funny anymore. A third explosion caught you off guard. Again, Bucky shielded you from the force of it. How the hell did that happen anyway? And where the fuck was Zemo? Wait. Did he just blow up your surroundings? You would not be surprised if that was the case. It was him. You watched how he handled your opponents all by himself. Well, he could only do such a thing because you had caused them a good amount of damage already. Bucky motioned for you all to go & you did not think twice about it. The sooner you were away from this scene, the better. The gunshots were still going strong & when the super soldier noticed that you were not keeping up with their pace due to the pain you were still experiencing, he grabbed your wrist & dragged you along. Your legs did not want to move anymore. But you knew you could not stop now. Stopping would have you dead for sure.

“Buck!” Sam yelled over his shoulder. A door was opened & Bucky pretty much shoved you inside. Then, he grabbed a pipe & handled your attackers.

“Let’s go!” Wilson pulled him inside & closed the door right behind him. At least you had a second to breathe now. The super soldier grabbed your shoulder, eyebrows raising slightly, silently asking you if your were alright. A thumbs up from you answered it. He knew you were trying to play it cool but he decided against commenting on it. That could be done later.

Exiting the container again, a car came to a halt right in front of you. No way. Zemo. That motherfucker.

“Supercharged.” he smirked at your dumfounded expressions.

“I know I said I don’t hate you but the strong dislike is slowly starting to increase to an almost hate level.” you let him know.

“I can live with that.” Zemo’s winning smile did not falter.

“You’re going back to jail.” Sam was angry, his voice gave him away.

“Do you want to find Karli or not?” what kind of stupid question was that? Of course you wanted to find her.

“He’s right. We need him.” never in your wildest dreams had you ever expected Bucky to rely on Zemo. Yet, here you were. “And there’s three of us & at least twenty of them, come on.” Bucky opened the door for you to get in first. After you got seated, he entered himself.

“Fine. But if you try that shit again…” Sam’s finger pointed in a threatening way.

“I wouldn’t dream of it.”

“Well, that was one hell of a reunion.” Sharon closed the door behind Wilson.

“Wait. You’re not coming with us? Sharon, come on.” you almost pleaded.

“I told you I can’t. Just get me that pardon you promised me.” now, she was talking to Sam.

“You take care, okay?” your concerning eyes met hers.

“I will. You too. But it looks like you have someone who looks after you anyway.” she winked at you before moving away. Of course she was referring to Bucky. Sharon was good at reading people.

“You’re not gonna move your seat up, are you?” Sam sighed & you giggled at the déjà vu moment.

“No.” Bucky replied simply.

“Zemo? Can you move your seat up?” you teased, not expecting anything to come out of it.

“Of course. My apologies for taking up too much space.” & he really went ahead & moved his seat up. Putting your face in your hands, you heard Sam & Bucky snicker. Zemo seemed oblivious to everything. Hell, you just wanted to sleep for the next few days. It was exhausting to be around those guys all the time. Luck had not really been on your side in Madripoor.

You were back on Zemo’s private jet. Bucky sitting opposite of you, cleaning his metal hand. You had an ice pack that you held to the back of your head. Sam had a phone call with Torres, giving him the information you had found out. And the Baron? Well, you did not really care what he did.

“You okay, Sam?” your voice was soft.

“Yeah.” your eyebrows furrowed at that. “Just thinking about all the shit Sharon had to go through.” so did you, actually. If you were not as lucky, you would have ended up like her. Most definitely. “And Nagel referring to the American test subject like Isaiah wasn’t even a real person. Just makes me wonder how many people have to get steamrolled to make way for this hunk of metal.” you gulped at that.

“Well, it depends on who you ask.” Bucky joined your conversation. “That hunk of metal saved a lot of lives. “

“I have to agree with Buck on this one…” your eyes trailed to your lap.

“Yeah, I get that. Alright. Maybe I made a mistake.”

“You did. A huge mistake.” your head snapped up again, eyes slightly glossy by just thinking about it. You would not let the tears fall, though. Not here. Not in front of them.

“Yeah.” sounded like he realized that he was in the wrong. “Maybe I shouldn’t have put it in a museum. Maybe I should have destroyed it.”

“Look, that shield represents a lotta things to a lotta people, including me.” Bucky’s words were low. He chose them carefully, you could tell. “The world is upside down, & we need a new Cap, & it ain’t gonna be Walker.”

“I’ll make fucking sure of that.” you chuckled shortly.

“So will I.” the super soldier nodded at you. His gaze fell to Sam a second after. “So before you go & destroy it, I’ll take it from him myself.”

“This isn’t what Steve wanted.” it was almost inaudible, yet, two pairs of eyes stared at you. “I’m sorry to break it to you, but Steve made that decision. He thought this through. He didn’t want you to give up the shield, Sam. And he didn’t want you to take on that role, Buck.” again, Sam’s phone rang & he picked up. Zemo came over & brought each of you a plate with food. Thanking him silently, you waited for Wilson to finish. The Baron sat down, glancing between you all.

“They found Madani...” Sam started. Finally, good news. “Dead.” shit, bad news. “She died in Riga, a city near the Baltic Sea.”

“I have a place we can go.” Zemo told you.

“Is there a place on this Earth that isn’t part of your property?” rolling your eyes, you laid back in your chair.

“Believe it or not, there is, (Y/N).” he started again. “I, for one, am looking forward to coming face to face with Karli. Oeznik, we’re changing the course.” he ordered.

Riga, Latvia. If you were honest, you were surprised that you still followed Zemo. After all, he was kind of a criminal. But so were you. Kind of.

“I heard what became of Sokovia.” the Baron started a conversation as you walked down one of the many streets. “Cannibalized by its neighbors before the land was given cleared of rubble, erased from the map. I don’t suppose any of you bothered visiting the memorial?”

“I did.” your confession made him stop in his tracks. An approving nod was all you received. Neither Sam nor Bucky knew about this. You did not find it worth mentioning.

“We are here.” Zemo stated.

“I’m gonna go on a walk.” Bucky spoke up all of a sudden. Turning around, you saw something behind his eyes. He noticed something. You were not sure what it was but you would find out.

“You good?” because obviously, Zemo cared so much for you all.

“I’ll come with you.” walking over to him, you eyed him carefully.

“I’m gonna go on a walk alone.” he emphasized the last word but you were having none of it.

“Last time I checked, you barely let me out of your sight. I’m coming with you. End of discussion.” your eyes bore into his. You were serious & it was clear as day that you would not let him out of your sight now. Bucky threw his head back in frustration & sighed out.

“Okay, come on.” one of his hands found yours & he dragged you with him. Leaving a very confused Sam & an even more confused Zemo behind.

Bucky went to pick up a small beeping ball. Your question got ignored. He told you if you really wanted to join his walk then he would let you know sooner or later. The two of you followed behind what seemed like a trail of those little objects. Unknowingly, your fingers were still intertwined with Bucky’s. Neither of you seemed to mind. Being smarter now, you just let him do whatever he wanted or needed to do. Answers would follow soon. After all, that was what he promised you. Bucky came to a halt in a backstreet. Holding up one of the balls, he started talking.

“You dropped something.” who the hell was he talking to? Turning around, you were shocked when a woman was standing in front of you. Tugging one of Bucky’s sleeves, he looked into the same direction as you.

“I was wondering when you were gonna show up.” did that mean that Bucky was expecting her? She seemed somewhat familiar but you did not remember where you had seen her before. Realization hit you when she started speaking in a language you definitely recognized. It was Wakandan. You even understood what she said.

“I’m here for Zemo.” whatever that meant, it could not be good.

~to be continued~

Next Chapter

Published (04/16/2021) by Cathy

Tags: @taina-eny​, @tanyaherondale​, @cool-ultra-nerd​, @toribentleyva​, @buckyandlokirunmylife​, @annadier​, @howlongtillidie​, @mizz-kraziii​, @theetherealbloom​, @millenniumloki​, @marvelbros-oneshots​, @ajbwasnthere, @bilesxbilinskixlahey​, @mystictimetravelcolor​, @dbrees256​, @sxpxrnxturxl, @dreamydreamerwriting​, @dolllstyles​, @angelicastiel​, @prettysbliss​, @infinitelyforgotten​, @sweetserendipity65​, @lilystilinskicullen​, @partypoisonsblog​, @btdsprayberry, @sarai-ibn-la-ahad​, @deamus-liv​, @simplybarnes​, @sethcohenluvr​, @sammypotato67​, @toribentleyva​, @farihafangirls​, @earthtonav, @lilacs-lavender​ (let me know if you wanna be tagged <3)

[flower-crowns-and-combat-boots]

"Any questions" is a bit of a trick. They want to know how much you know about the organization, how much you researched, things like that. I like to throw a little curve ball:

-What's the corporate culture like here? This can tell you what you're getting into. Listen for use of buzz words, or words like 'family'. That can mean that they won't respect you or your time.

-How long have you been at the organization? This can tell you about employee turnover. If both of your interviewers have been there around a year, maybe they can't retain talent, which means you're going to get low-balled regarding your salary request.

-How much paid time off have you taken this year/Have you taken any PTO this year? A bit risky 'cause it's personal, but if they're willing to tell you that can be pretty OK. If you're interviewing later in the year and they haven't taken any, that's a sign that corporate culture frowns upon folks taking their PTO. If they're saving it, that means they don't get enough.

-If they did take PTO, did you go anywhere fun or exciting or different? They may not want to tell you, but if they went to a foreign country that can be a good indicator that they're paid enough. Not a PERFECT indicator, but good enough.

-Why do you like working here? Have them give you some talking points about their tenure here. If they clam up, or use lots of corporate buzzwords, they don't like the role and are probably actively looking elsewhere. You should be too.

-Why should I work here? This one is excellent. It shows that you're less 'please give me a job!' and more 'I value myself and know my worth, will this role be worthwhile to me?' This could scare them though, but honestly if this question scares them you don't want to work here anyway.

-Why is the role I'm filling vacant? Excellent. They may not discuss in detail though, but still lots of information to be gleaned. Was the user fired? Did they leave? If so why did they leave? Are you filling in for a Leave of Absence? Why are they on LOA (they probably can't tell you that, but you can ask). Is it a new role they've invented for a reason?

-What kind of benefits package do you offer, and if you offer one when will I be able to access it? This one WILL scare them. It's corporate-speak for 'I have potential health issues that may prevent me from performing the role'. Use this sparingly.

-Is there a union, and if there is can I join it / how soon can I join it? This one will really, REALLY scare them. If you're asking about a union, you definitely know your worth, and you know that the only way to get a fair deal is to collectively bargain with management.

There are also some more technical ones you can ask. These would be role-dependent:

-What is change management like here? This will tell you how rigid they are about changes that are pushed to the org or to end users or to the public. If they don't have a change management process, you may want to reconsider working there. If change management is too rigid you will never get anything done. What kind of maintenance windows are you looking at? Do they have a maintenance window once a month? Once every two months? Once every six months? What teams are involved? Is it a rubber-stamp scout's honor approval, or does approval require the other approvers be knowledgeable about the systems they're approving for?

-What kind of environments do you use here? Windows, Mac, Linux? What kind of hardware? What kind of software? Is there a software approval process or is it all Shadow IT? Do they have a Development and/or Quality Assurance environment to go along with Production, or is everything just done in Production with hopes for it not blowing anything up?

-What is scheduling like? This will tell you how soon your schedule will be posted, how often you'll be in a certain time slot, and things of that nature. Basically, do they value your time? Will they let you schedule things like appointments, dates, family gatherings, emergencies, or will you always be guessing about your next shift? Additionally, if they have multiple locations, will you always be at the same location or will they move you around a lot?

-Do you have an internal helpdesk / what kind of ticketing system do you use? Also good. They may have a helpdesk but it may be farmed out, which is not ideal but better than nothing. Additionally, if they don't use a ticketing system and instead just track challenges with emails, that means that any challenge you have may get lost in the email chatter and not addressed in a timely manner, or not addressed at all. Be prepared to resolve your own challenges, which brings me to:

-What does your IT Security department look like? If you're going to be solving your own problems most of the time, they may not have a robust IT Security department, which means they don't have good Change Management and a LOT of Shadow IT. This means potential for viruses/malware/cryptoware on computer systems and beyond. Very much not ideal.

Please keep in mind that my roles are typically IT-based, so these questions are more in line with that kind of job role. That said, I'm sure lots of them are flexible enough that you can modify them to fit your individual needs.

Some of these questions will definitely scare your interviewers, so be ready for that. If at the end of the interview you're not sure you want this job anymore, please feel free to throw them a few curve balls, and then post their answers on Glassdoor or something so other folks can know about what they're getting into.

[whitewolfmoving]

You Can’t Take Me, I’m Free || Back To You Series

Prompt: “Just because I’m being civil with you, doesn’t mean I like you.” || suggested by @suitofvibraniumarmor

A/N: Here is another drabble for my Back To You series! None of these are being written or posted in order, but will be in order on the masterlist when I create it. (Title for this drabble is lyrics from one of my favourite songs off of the soundtrack from Spirit: Stallion of the Cimarron) Have fun! 💜

Bucky led Sam and Maia to some sort of garage, he was talking nonsense and neither of them really understood why. First, he made them wait outside while he went to talk to one of the most dangerous men they’d ever faced, now, he was blabbering on about using him to help in their mission against the rebel Super Soldiers.

Bucky and Maia had only just been released to go out without needing to go back to Dr. Raynor, but there was still so much that both of them were holding on to. And Sam wasn’t a Super Soldier. Two impossible-to-kill former HYDRA assassins and a guy with high tech bird wings didn’t stand a chance against eight people who could do exactly what Bucky and Maia could.

The conversation all but stalled as Bucky tried to reason with Sam. Maia growled. She hated being reminded of her time under HYDRA’s command, even more of her time under Zemo’s. He’d done so much damage when he was free; damage she’d been a part of, and it’d taken years for her to come to terms with her hand in all of it. It was hard not to feel betrayed by just the idea that Bucky was even considering using Zemo to help them track down Karli.

Bucky felt along the wall for the electrical panel and flipped the switch, the lights flickered on and illuminated the garage. He looked at Maia hopefully, asking her to take his side, just this once. “Let me just walk you through a hypothetical. Can I walk you through a hypothetical?”

Sam narrowed his eyes. “What did you do?”

“I didn’t do anything.” The White Wolf shook his head. “The weakest point in any system isn’t the software, the hardware, it’s the meatware. The human element. Now, in this lockup, it’s nine to one, prisoners to guards. And if two prisoners start fighting, then the protocol says four guards have to respond.”

“Bucky, are you fucking high?” The first words Maia had spoken since the trio left the main facility and they were dripping with malice. She didn’t want to believe he could be serious about this, but clearly, he was.

Sam agreed. “So why would two prisoners randomly start fighting at that moment?”

Bucky went on, “Who knows? There could be many reasons. . . But the point is, these things escalate. Lockdown procedures would have to be initiated, and with all those bodies flying around left and right, wouldn’t be hard to slip down a hallway or two. And if the fire alarm got tripped while the prisoners were being separated. . . someone could use the chaos to their advantage.”

“I don’t like how specific this hypothetical has gotten,” Maia said.

“I don’t like how casual you’re being about this, it’s unnatural. And where are we, man?” Sam parroted.

A door in the distance opened and someone in a guard uniform walked through the curtain behind the car. It only took Maia seconds to realize Zemo was who entered the room. She roared; in a flash, she had Zemo backed against a nearby wall, the force of his back hitting the structure rang out around them. Fire sparked and burned in her eyes, the rage she was trying so hard to keep contained burst forth and she pinned the man with one hand at his throat, while the other quickly drew a dagger from the holster on her thigh.

Sam looked at Bucky, unsure how to proceed. “Is this what you wanted?”

Bucky approached her from behind, hands in the air. He wet his lips, thinking through how to properly diffuse the situation. He should’ve recognized the signs as soon as Zemo stepped through the door, but he’d been too preoccupied. He laid his right hand over the one Maia held around Zemo’s throat, and his left grasped the one holding the knife.

“Easy, easy. Let him go. Come on, Mai. You don’t need to do this. Întoarce-te la mine, dragă,” Bucky whispered in Maia’s ear. He moved in close, the muscles of his chest pressed against her back. “You are not his Demon anymore.”

Maia relaxed, only just, into the warmth radiating from Bucky’s body. The rigidness slowly melted away; she let Bucky slip the dagger from her fingers, let him remove her hand from the Baron’s neck. The flames in her eyes died and gave way to the rich coffee brown that Bucky adored so much. “Just because I’m being civil with you, doesn’t mean I like you.”

Zemo smirked. “Oh, I think I can change your mind, Soldat.”

[queenlua]

Last week you mentioned GPG has really serious problems. Could you tell me more about them? I can't find much of anything online.

first, thanks for your patience with this appallingly late reply! september hit me like a truck :P

second: huh, wow, okay, a cursory google search really failed to turn up much stuff, huh. depressing!

i'm-a talk about the summer 2019 keyserver attack, not because that's the only issue / security vuln / fuck-up the project has ever had, but because it's (1) a hilariously bad fuck-up, and (2) generally reflective of how the project deals with security concerns, and thus demonstrates that the project is fundamentally pretty unserious

so.

this gist, by one of GnuPG's maintainers, does an okay job of summarizing the problem. a brief summary:

* one of the putative purposes of OpenPGP is to provide a "web of trust" via keyservers. i know Jane Doe, i meet her in person, i verify she is who she says she is, and i sign her key; that signature gets reflected in some keyserver, which acts like a big phone book. now, in the future, if you can't personally go verify Jane Doe's trustworthiness, but you do trust me, you can trust communications from Jane Doe, and you looked all this info up in the keyserver

* "what if a malicious actor tried to overload the keyserver?!?!" e.g. what if i spam ~150k signatures on some dude's key just to fuck with the network

* the answer, in the case of GnuPG, is, "this software is shitty and bad and can't deal with that volume so it just grinds to a fucking halt"

* ...and also most the keyservers try to copy their data from each other so you can have a ~web of trust~ throughout the network, which means, these malicious keys quickly perpetuate through the entire nnetwork

* which means anyone who receives the Forbidden Key Data TM, in practical terms, has broken their fucking GnuPG install, and that whole ~web of trust~ thing we built up is now unusable

technically speaking, this is not a security lapse per se! no cryptography has been broken; no secret data has been leaked. it is, however, a fairly straightforward denial of service attack, and is probably kind of disappointing if you wanted your security software to, you know, do software things

and look, anyone can be bitten by a nasty bug. you'll never see me being like "WOW WHAT DUMBFUCKS, HOW COULD ANYONE WRITE SUCH A STUPID BUG," because, y'know, there but for the grace of god i go, and all that. if anyone tells you they're smart enough to never write a bug, they're a fucking liar.  (my full-time job for a while was literally proving those people liars, and i never fucking failed, not because i am brilliant, but because all have sinned and fallen short of the glory of god. [sorry for all the god stuff; my long-abandoned southern baptist heritage comes through when i'm talking security for some reason])

however! the manner in which you respond to such a vulnerability matters:

* let's say i had discovered this bug in GnuPG. the industry standard, if i'm kind and polite, is: i disclose the bug privately to the maintainers, and they have a 90-day window during which to fix it. if they still haven't fixed the problem at the end of the 90 days, that's fine, that's their prerogative, but *i* also get to announce to the world "hey there's this bad bug, here's how i found it, and here's how to exploit it."

this is done to keep The World In General TM safer. see, i'm just some rando. if *i'm* able to find a bug in your shitty software, then it's guaranteed the NSA or Unit 8200 or some-other-super-secret-government-agency absolutely has the resources and wherewithal to find the same bug. and also, some slimy just-in-it-for-the-money hacker gang probably also has the resources to find it. by telling the company "hey, i will go public with this in 90 days," i'm lighting a fire under their ass to actually fix the problem, rather than just letting them pretend security by obscurity will save them, and if they don't fix it by then, then at least users have a prayer of finding out, hey, these dudes do not take security problems seriously, and making informed choices based on that.

there is some wiggle room in this. for instance, the fuck are cloud vendors supposed to do about something like Spectre/Meltdown? there were some shitty, not-100%-effective mitigations that could be done in software, but fundamentally the only real fix was getting new hardware, and tragically, we cannot redesign, manufacture, and ship brand new CPUs to everybody who might be affected within a 90-day timeframe. ergo, Google Project Zero pushed their disclosure deadline way out on that. but, crucially: they still went public at some point, and Intel did not cry "wah" or "no fair" or anything like that. they worked with researchers as best as they could, and once the cat was out of the bag, they offered public resources to help developers understand how their software might be affected. that's the rules of the game.

compare this to, uh, GnuPG's outrageously shitty response (from the previously-linked gist), which can basically be summarized as:

* "wah ocaml is complicated and we don't know how to maintain our own fucking software wah"

* "ten years [?!?!?!] wasn't enough time for us to fix the problem wah"

* "whoever did this attack is a hater :((((("

which. what. what the actual fuck. those are not actual reasons to not fix your sofwtare.

also, the way in which you present your software matters:

* i've thrown up shitty hobby projects on github before. if someone came to me all earnest with a CVE against them, i'd laugh, append the README to say "yo i threw this together on a weekend while i was buzzed, you should absolutely not be relying on this for anything that matters, xoxo lua." that is 100% fine! advertising THIS SOFTWARE IS NOT NECESSARILY SECURE and thus electing not to give a shit about security problems is fine.

* i've been a part of things that are... somewhere between a hobby project and Real Software TM. e.g., research prototypes that you're hoping will be widely used so you can get a better sense of desired use cases and unexpected constraints, but which you hope will be used primarily by "power users" or others who are interested in that project's specific goals.

such a project may not be able to offer the same kinds of security guarantees as Fancy Corporate Software, and that's fine, so long as they're open and honest about stuff like: what the goals of the project are, what we're sure of and what we're less sure of, how we're vetting our stuff, what our policies are when someone does report a security issue, stuff like that. there's plenty of stuff maintained on a volunteer basis that i'd generally trust because, i expect they'll notify me if there is a serious security concern to be worried about, or they have a long track record of excellence in a narrowly-tailored space, etc. that's all good.

* what you cannot, cannot, cannot do, is: claim to offer some kind of robust security solution to people in actually-precarious situations, and then not actually act like a steward of those person's interests. if you're, oh, telling Venezeulan dissidents "our [shitty hobby] software [with gaping, well-known vulnerabilities that haven't been exploited yet ONLY because no major nation-state entity has felt threatened by our code yet, but if they were so threatened, they could trivially wreck the entire project using a well-documented years-old vulnerability we can't be assed to fix because ocaml is hard i guess] is safe and reliable to use!"

...if you're telling political dissidents that? and then you get over-the-top pissed off at someone pointing out the fucking problem you refuse to fix? and somehow make it all about mememe? then fuck you, sincerely. the threat those dissidents face is not someone breaking the fucking key network. the threat is you, you personally, because you are fucking lying to them about what your software is able to do.

GOD. sorry, just. i reread that link and got so pissed again. fuck that attitude entirely. if you let people down, fucking just sit with that for a bit, okay?  sit and think and do better next time.  christ.

anyway.

this is a particularly gratuitous example of GnuPG maintainers being little shits, but in general they've been lackadaisical and dismissive some other times in the past when people have brought them real security problems, and then act all pissy if, y'know, people go public with said security problems. i haven't kept up with their work lately (i think maybe the community got kind of annihilated by this keyserver thing?) & i have other bones to pick with any project of that type (it's kind of taking the wrong tack entirely imho), but like, yeah, in general if a software community's response to security bugs is "oh gosh that's hard maybe we'll get to it someday," you should not be trusting that software lol

[fenrir-beta]

Does it stand to reason that you've lost data because of a dumb mistake

a software bug, or a hardware failure? If so, what happened? If so, please share your experience with me. If this is the case, you are not alone in your feelings. Every year, approximately one out of every two people suffers a data loss event. Many consumers who are desperate to recover their data seek to professional data recovery services, only to realize that the fees they charge are anything from straightforward. 

In case you're interested in knowing how much data recovery services cost, keep reading. You'll find out the answer at the end of this post, so keep reading. Data recovery prices, on the other hand, are difficult to estimate, and you should not expect to receive a specific quote from our team.

Pro Tip: By following this simple piece of advice, you will be able to considerably reduce your data recovery expenses: As soon as you detect that important files have vanished from your storage device, you should immediately turn off your computer and disconnect from the internet. Why? For the simple reason that you don't want to overwrite them, which would make their recovery significantly more difficult, if not impossible, at best, and impossible at worst, you want to avoid doing so altogether.

Remember to test out DIY data recovery software before seeking the assistance of a professional data recovery company or service. IMPORTANT: In order to decide whether a software solution is appropriate for you, what factors should you use? Detailed information on the many types of data loss scenarios can be found here. 

Why Is It So Difficult to Estimate the Cost of Data Recovery Services?

 Aren't you certain that this isn't the only article about data recovery prices that you've read in the last few days, don't you? Given that we believe what we say is right, you're probably wondering why it's so difficult to find a thorough overview of data recovery prices for different storage devices (hard drives, optical media, memory cards, etc.) and data loss scenarios on the internet (water ingress, accidental formatting, malware attack, and so on). 

Data recovery prices are a mystery to many people, and you are most certainly not alone in feeling this way. Think about the following questions, which were submitted on the Reddit community r/data recovery, which is dedicated to exploring data recovery techniques, both logical and physical:

Currently, I am using a Seagate 1 TB portable hard drive that has fallen off my desk and landed on my foot, resulting in a jarring beeping sound. What would the cost be to retrieve the information from it be in terms of money and time? I primarily use it to save photographs that I haven't bothered to back up to a separate hard disk on my computer. It was my error not to back up the information from an old laptop (which had all of my university work, which I could use for job applications), and I recently had an accident in which I dropped the laptop. Previously, it had been exhibiting some unpredictability in terms of crashing every now and then, but it is now simply crashing during the bootup process whenever I attempt to turn on the machine. Considering the circumstances, it is probable that the hard disk has malfunctioned. Assuming that is the case, how much do you think it would cost to remove the hard drive and transfer the contents to my current laptop? I am aware that it is feasible to complete the task on your own, but I do not wish to take the chance of causing further damage to the equipment. According to the source, my partner was issued a Passport, which was first functional but subsequently stopped working completely. Despite the fact that I saw no visual signs of damage, I attempted to run various programs on a Linux image (as recommended in this thread) and found that they were all unsuccessful. If I want to have any chance of getting the information back, will it cost me $500–$1000 to get it done properly? (Source) 

How come data recovery companies appear to conceal their pricing structures, making it more difficult for prospective clients to assess whether professional data recovery is a worthwhile investment? There are a lot of reasons for this, including: 

For every recovery work, the process is slightly different: In fact, some data recovery processes are so straightforward that they can be done in minutes without the use of any professional equipment. It is necessary to employ a data recovery clean room and to enlist the assistance of a highly qualified professional, who charges an hourly rate between $100 and $300, depending on the intricacy of the operation.

Remote assessments are unreliable for a variety of reasons, including the following: As a rule, data recovery companies undertake remote evaluations by phoning the customer and asking a series of questions in order to come up with at the very least an approximate cost estimation. Despite the fact that such assessments are unreliable since consumers are unable to always properly specify the cause of the data loss and the symptoms associated with it, they can be beneficial in certain cases.

It is possible to have a negative impact on your reputation by providing inaccurate quotes: One of the most important considerations is that data recovery companies cannot afford to trick consumers into believing that the cost of data recovery is lower than it truly is. Because most organizations wait until they have the storage device in their hands and are able to thoroughly check it to identify exactly what is wrong with it before disclosing data recovery charges, the reason for this is simple. 

You must first understand the distinctions between the most common data loss scenarios and how easy or difficult it is to recover from each one before you can estimate data recovery costs on your own.

The Most Common Data Loss Scenarios and How to Avoid Them 

Examine some of the most common data loss scenarios in greater detail, beginning with the one that frequently results in the least amount of money being spent on data recovery.

Unintentional deletion that was not meant (Affordable)

The cost ranges from 0 to 300 dollars.

However distressing it may be to discover that you have deleted the wrong file, it is actually the least expensive and complicated data loss scenario that can happen. Deleted files remain physically present on storage media until they are overwritten by new data, which makes it possible to recover them reasonably quickly with data recovery software (including DIY solutions like Disk Drill).

Inability to function at the logical level (Moderate) 

The cost of a hard disk symbol ranges from $300 to $1,000.

If you have a logical failure, it includes any file access issues that are caused by non-mechanical issues such as file directory damage caused by a virus assault on your computer, master boot record corruption, or inadvertent formatting, amongst other things. The majority of the time, when data is lost due to logical damage, it is difficult to recover it without utilizing a different computer and scanning the storage device in read-only mode, which is something that not all DIY data recovery methods are capable of achieving.

Mechanical failure is a type of failure that occurs because of mechanical factors (Expensive) 

The cost ranges from $500 to $3,000 based on the damage icon. 

If your hard drive begins to produce unusual noises, suffers an unlucky contact with water, or suddenly fails without a trace, you have a severe problem on your hands. Due to the fact that mechanical defects can be exceedingly expensive to repair and necessitate the use of replacement components, specialized procedures and equipment, as well as an enclosed cleanroom environment, success is not guaranteed.

The Cost of Data Recovery Is Influenced by a Number of Other Factors 

utilizing the services of a calculator

Data recovery prices can be influenced by a variety of additional factors in addition to the type of data loss scenario you encounter. When comparing data recovery prices between data recovery businesses, such as a local and a distant data recovery company, it is important to keep these factors in mind.

 Typical hourly rates: Data recovery specialists are highly sought-after professionals who command a high hourly rate in addition to a salary that is far higher than the national minimum wage. Having said that, there is a big difference between the data recovery rates achieved by professionals working for a company based in San Francisco and those achieved by specialists working for a company situated, say, in Belarus.

Not all data recovery companies have invested the same amount of money in obtaining the technology necessary to handle even the most difficult cases of data loss, and not all data recovery organizations are the same in their approach to data recovery. Inevitably, a company with shelves full of high-end equipment that ensures excellent recovery results will demand a higher price than a collection of college kids operating out of their garage.

Access to facilities and infrastructure is determined by the following factors: Data recovery companies that do not have actual offices or warehouses are known as "virtual data recovery companies." However, while reducing their infrastructure can help them save money, it does not always translate into better service.

Replaceable hard drive parts: Because enterprise-grade hard drives can be prohibitively expensive, the cost of replacement parts (which must often be found from a healthy donor drive) can considerably increase the cost of hard drive recovery and data recovery services.

Transparency in turnaround time: If you dislike waiting and want your data back as soon as possible, be prepared to spend extra money on expedited delivery and priority recovery services, which are both more expensive. Depending on the company, the sum can differ significantly. Exceptional discounts and free priority care are usual when dealing with large clients, such as corporations with thousands of employees. However, small consumers rarely receive the same discounts and priority treatment as their larger counterparts. 

However, it is crucial to remember that the cost of data recovery is frequently unaffected by the amount of data that needs to be recovered. The reason for this is that virtually all reputable data recovery companies charge a fixed fee plus an hourly rate that, according to statistics provided by Thumbtack, tends to hover around $150 per hour, but can range between $100 and $300 depending on the circumstances. 

When all other variables are held constant, restoring 1 TB is technically more time-consuming than recovering GB. The problem is that these variables are never held constant in real-world scenarios. The difference in read/write speeds between contemporary SSDs (about 500 MB/s) and traditional hard drives (80-160 MB/s) explains why it may be able to recover 1 TB of data much more quickly than, say, a 500 GB of information. 

Any data recovery company that charges by the gigabyte (or megabyte) of recovered data should raise red flags in your mind, and you should avoid doing business with them. This is due to the fact that the individuals in charge of the firm are most likely attempting to take advantage of unskilled data loss victims by charging them an unreasonably high fee.

Are there any differences in the cost of data recovery depending on the type of device that is used? 

Data storage devices are a type of storage device that is used to store digital information. 

In the course of their daily job, data recovery professionals recover lost data from a wide range of devices, such as the ones listed below: 

Disk drives (sometimes known as hard disks) are computer storage devices (HDDs)

Solid-state drives (SSDs) are a type of drive that makes use of solid-state technology to store and transfer data (SSDs)

External hard drives are hard disks that are not installed internally in a computer.

Memory cards are small electrical devices that are used to store data on a computer.

USB flash drives are compact, portable storage devices that can be carried around with you.

Digital cameras are devices that use digital technology to capture photographs.

Smartphones and tablets are growing more and more popular every day.

Personal computers are divided into two categories: laptops and desktop PCs. 

The cost of data recovery, however, remains essentially determined by the factors outlined in the previous two chapters of this chapter, despite the major variances between the two devices. 

Why? This is because recovering several terabytes of data from an enterprise-grade hard disk that has been accidentally formatted is no more difficult than recovering a few megabytes of data from a severely damaged USB flash drive whose memory chip has barely made it out alive. 

Thus, just because one storage device looks to be "simpler" than another, it does not necessarily follow that recovering your data from the simpler device is more straightforward.

If professional data recovery is not an option, what are the other options available to you?

For the Mac, there is disk drill software. 

You can perform your own data recovery on a Mac by using Disk Drill for Mac (also available for Windows). 

That's right, there is such a thing! In addition to what we've already stated, some data loss situations can be resolved with the help of DIY data recovery software, as we've illustrated in this article. Listed below are three common data recovery software options that are available to users of the Windows operating system, the Mac operating system, and the Linux operating system: 

Disk Drill is the Editors' Choice (Windows, Mac) Featured in the Editors' Choice: Disk Drill is a well-liked tool among professionals and casual home users alike, and it is acclaimed for its remarkable performance and straightforward interface.

Recuva (for Windows) is an application that helps you to recover accidentally deleted files from your computer. This free data recovery software utility streamlines the process of discovering and undeleting mistakenly deleted files on Windows-based computers by utilizing a recovery wizard, which is included with the software.

PhotoRec is a photo editing program that is available for Windows, Mac, and Linux. PhotoRec, an image restoration software, is compatible with virtually every major operating system currently in use and supports hundreds of image, video, music, and document file formats, as well as a variety of other formats. 

These and other data recovery software solutions can be used to recover files that have been recently erased, files that have been formatted, and other data loss scenarios that are the result of logical failure, among other scenarios. Their abilities do not include the ability to recover data from storage devices that have been mechanically damaged. 

Unfortunately, there is currently no method to get around this constraint of the data recovery software solutions that are now in operation. As a matter of fact, we strongly advise against attempting to recover data from failed storage devices using such programs because you will almost likely make the situation worse. 

It is not advisable to deal with physical damage on your own unless you possess the necessary skills, cleanroom equipment, and precision instruments. If you are recovering data from a logically damaged device, you should only utilize data recovery software; leave physical damage to data recovery professionals.

[refinedbuffoonery]

I + Can’t + Lose + You (3)

Read it on A03. 

Filler chapters are so hard to write, y’all, so this chapter is real short. The next update will get back to the actual plot, so you’ll get to see Riley and Mama Colton in action. Thank you to all the people who hyped me up to write this one. Your support is invaluable. I love you. :) 

*****

Riley and Mama were in the absolute middle of nowhere when the last radio station died. They hadn’t seen any signs of civilization for two hours, and it would be at least two more before they reached Phoenix. Periodically, a car drove by or a tumbleweed rolled across the road, but seeing anything else out the window was asking too much. 

Riley let her mind wander as she drove down the long, straight road; now was as good of a time as ever to think through the software she’d spent the week debugging. She’d fixed most of the issues, but the solution to one last error dangled just out of reach. 

Heat waves rippled off the road, and Riley snapped her attention back to driving, squinting slightly to see through the wavy mirage. 

Mama turned down the volume—just static now anyway. “I’m sorry for the way my son treated you. You certainly did not deserve it.” 

Well that was unexpected. Riley appreciated her words, even though she was long over Billy Colton. 

“Is there a new man in your life?” Mama asked. Riley blushed, just slightly. “So there is,” she said knowingly. The woman didn’t miss a thing. “Well, who is he?” 

Smiling to herself, Riley let her biggest secret spill. “He’s Mac.” 

There it was. 

She finally admitted it aloud to someone other than Mac, and even that confession didn’t cover the full scope of her feelings. Bozer had figured it out forever ago, but it wasn’t the same as her actually telling someone. A weight lifted off her chest. 

“MacGyver.” Mama said his name in that rolling, overly-Southern way she always did. “A lucky man. What makes him so special?” 

For some reason, Riley felt safe sharing with Mama, so she did. “He wants to make the world a better place,” she said. “He’s selfless, he doesn’t have an evil bone in his body, and he’s the smartest person I’ve ever met.” She glanced at Mama before continuing. “Mac makes me want to be better. To do good. I—” her words died in her throat. 

Mama knew she’d been to prison but not the full story of what landed Riley there. Riley didn’t feel like rehashing the parts of her past she’d rather not think about. 

“Go on,” Mama murmured. 

Riley flexed her fingers around the steering wheel. “I wasn’t always that way.” That was all she was willing to say on that matter. 

“I see. I don’t know who you were before”—before you went to prison, she didn’t need to say—“but the woman driving my truck is a fine human being.” Mama cracked a grin. “You should really meet her.” 

Riley snorted. “I should, should I?” 

They passed the time in peaceful silence. Riley figured the older woman had fallen asleep, but not long after passing a sign reading sixty miles until Phoenix, she drawled, “Do you trust him?”

Riley frowned at the context-less question. “Trust who?” 

Mama shot her an exasperated “who else?” look. “MacGyver! Who else would we be talking about?” 

Oh. Riley answered, “I trust him completely.” She’d trusted him from the moment he picked the locks on her handcuffs all those years ago. 

“Good. Now, does he trust you?” 

Apparently this car ride was now an interrogation. “Yeah.” 

“Do you love him?” 

“Yes.” Of course she loved him...how could she not? 

“Are you in love with him? Those are two very different things, you know.” 

Riley did know. “Also yes.” 

“And is he in love with you?” 

Taking a deep breath of too-warm air, Riley said, “Honestly, I don’t know. I think so?” 

Mama narrowed her eyes, evidently realizing Riley’s situation was more complicated than she let on. “What makes you so sure he’s the one for you?” 

Riley paused before answering. She had to get this right. Not only to appease Mama, but to know, without a shadow of a doubt, herself. 

“Because he’s always there for me,” Riley started. “When shit hits the fan, I can always count on Mac. As long as he’s around, I never have to face stuff alone, and I do the same for him. It’s us against the world, not me against him, you know?” Riley smiled. “I’ve never seen my life flash before my eyes more times than when I’m with him, but he’s somehow still the safest, most trustworthy person I know.” 

Riley waited. And waited. And waited. 

After taking far too long to think it over, Mama seemed satisfied with Riley’s answers. “I’m glad you found each other.” 

*****

Mac needed gas, but with the truck in cruise control he could make it all the way to Indio before he had to stop. In the meantime, he couldn’t blast the radio loud enough to drown out the horrible what-if scenarios running through his head. 

He would find Riley and bring her home. That much Mac had reassured himself about—at least enough to stave off the Riley-is-dead nightmare scenarios. He’d get there. Until then, she was plenty capable of holding her own. 

But even when he did get her back...god they’d made such a mess. Ever since that damn undercover mission to Monte Carlo, Riley shied away from Mac’s touch. They used to be in each other’s personal space all the time, but now there were walls up between them that never existed before. 

Mac wished Monte Carlo had never happened at all. 

He hated everything about the way the confession happened—the screaming, blowing their covers, it piggybacking off other emotional trauma. Knowing she reciprocated his feelings was everything, but not when the cost was no relationship and a wide chasm between him and his best friend. He’d rather still not know and wait for the right time for a quiet, loving confession. 

The truck dinged as the gas light came on. “Shut up. I know,” he groaned. A green sign read ten miles until Indio. 

Are you sure we aren’t making a massive mistake?

We can’t do this. 

Mac refused to believe they already blew their chance at happiness. They just needed to try again. At least neither of them had said, “I love you.” They still had that. When the right time finally came—a quiet night at his house, sitting by the firepit, watching the city lights below—they would try again, this time leading with soft expressions and those three little words. 

He could try again. He would try again. 

As Indio rolled into view, Mac turned off the freeway at the first gas station he saw. It was practically empty, so he started filling the tank and headed inside the convenience store in search of a snack. 

He settled for a king-sized Reese’s and an iced green tea. Placing his snacks on the counter, Mac greeted the cashier with the standard, “Hey, how’s it going?” and was caught completely off guard when the scrawny teenage boy’s face lit up and he launched into a story about some pretty woman who fixed the security camera. 

Following the kid’s gestures, Mac spied the camera in the far corner, lens smashed out and wiring sticking out the front. He walked deeper into the store to get a closer look. Whoever fixed it wired a cell phone camera into the camera hardware—exactly what he would’ve done. 

Wait. 

Mac whirled on the cashier. “Can you describe the woman who fixed that?” 

The kid—Marco, his nametag read—frowned. “Uhh how do I know you’re not some creepy stalker or something?” 

“If the woman who fixed that was the same woman I’m thinking of, I’m her best friend.” 

“Just checking, dude!” The kid shrugged. “She was hot, man. Black hair, big eyes, Van Halen shirt. I think she was with her mom.” 

Her mom? Mac filed that bit of information away for later, but that was Riley, alright. If she had time to fix a gas station security camera with pieces from her phone, then she was safe, at least for now. Mac breathed a sigh of relief. Her phone died because she broke it. “Thanks, man.” 

“No problem.” 

Mac raced for his truck. The cashier called after him, but Mac couldn’t hear the kid’s words over the ones repeating in his mind. Riley’s safe. 

Riley’s safe. 

Riley’s safe.

[nickgerlich]

Ringside Seat

For the last 38 years, I have enjoyed my ringside seat at the marketing arena. I have witnessed countless blunders, missteps, and failures. I have also witnessed some pretty amazing victories. But the things I like watching the most are when companies see themselves as something other than what they started out to be.

And I need look no farther than the technology world to see those examples.

It’s what happens when a company like Microsoft, developer of software and operating systems, decides it wants to be both hardware maker and retailer. It has done well with the Surface tablet, but proved to be a lousy shopkeeper. It’s what caused Apple to line-extend from computers to iPods, mobile devices, retail, and streaming entertainment. It has done exceedingly well with everything except the latter.

And it is what compelled Google to grow from search engine to software, maps, smartphone operating systems, hardware, social media, and now retail. The jury is still out on their one store, but we all know what an embarrassing flop they were in social media.

There’s also the case of Amazon, e-commerce giant who in recent years has seen itself as technology company and curator of its own eco-system. Its Alexa-driven products have found their way into many homes, as well as Ring security systems, which it bought in 2018.

But it is the latest round of Amazon’s products that has some critics up in arms, because those very same security systems are just as likely snooping around to learn every possible detail about you.

Like Astro, the rolling indoor security camera, and drones that circle your property checking for intruders. By combining Alexa into its security products and even a third-party security company to handle calling the police, Amazon now has its eyes on not just your property but you.

Watching. Listening. Assessing. Analyzing. And--wait for it--marketing.

Now before we move on, can we all agree that Astro is perhaps the silliest-looking product you have ever seen? It looks like a miniature version of Rosie on The Jetsons. But if it could also vacuum and get me a beer, I admit that I’d be first on the waiting list.

Once you realize that Amazon’s foot print in our houses is pervasive, it’s when you also realize it might just be invasive as well. Pair the new security products with other Alexa-based products we already have, and their new Amazon Fire TVs, and it is then you might just begin to question the wisdom of prancing around the house naked.

They. See. You.

I understand Amazon’s desire to sell more products, especially those it has developed itself. New products are the lifeblood of every marketer, from manufacturer to retailer. And I am OK with companies willing to take great risks for stepping outside of themselves and seeing themselves in a new light. Some of those efforts will work, but some will not.

But when the world’s largest online seller also wants to be the world’s largest digital assistant and security companies also, it raises eyebrows. Users must come to grips with the very real possibility that all that surveillance going on isn’t just about burglars, but you and your comings and going.

If people are OK with that proviso, then more power to them and Amazon. If you’re not good with your security company trying to sell you more stuff, and not because it bought data but rather captured the data itself, then you need to be a little more cautious.

Some eco-systems are good, like all of the Apple products that play so well together. That’s fine, because the intent is to provide a suite of products that enhance our lives, not theirs. Amazon’s latest products, though, are about enhancing their life as much as it is ours.

And for that reason I think I’ll pass on Astro. I mean, unless they really can make Version 2 do some housework. Or get me a beer.

Dr “Here’s To 38 More Years“ Gerlich

Audio Blog

[shiekah-marine-embassy]

How Did We Get Here?

A summary of an upcoming tale about my character Anderson, inspired by my own recent struggles.

Anderson spends several days comatose. Wakes up in an unfamiliar place, bound tightly to chair. Is unable to speak. Minutes later, attacker walks in. Attacker commentates on how Anderson was found on the coastline (attacker’s territory) in Yiga Attire. This was received as a threat and Anderson is now subject to imprisonment, torture for information, and Master Kohga will be contacted for ransom arrangements.

Anderson displays elevated levels of distress, which continually continues to increase as the attacker gets closer to establishing contact. The operation is temporarily forfeited when his screaming and begging is so loud that the gag may as well not have been there. Attacker displays frustration and confusion at Anderson’s distress, which is extreme even given the situation he is in.

Attacker removes the gag, and Anderson takes some time to compose himself before explaining that he was actually on the run from the Yiga, after a demon god accused him of treason and sabotage, turning his former lover, several of his friends, and the clan leaders against him. In the ensuing fight he managed to slaughter his ex-lover, incapacitate the right-hand man, severely wound the leader and demon god, and just as quickly made an escape.

He expresses fear and concern that if the leaders were to be made aware of his whereabouts, they would most definitely want him back for the sole purpose of subjecting him to what he describes as a “fate worse than death”, and that traitors and killers like him are not killed, but instead brutally and slowly tormented for the rest of their lives. Anderson undergoes extreme emotional distress and remorse upon recalling the events and is no longer able to compose himself to form words.

Attacker is skeptical, and comments on how the story sounds quite unbelievable. However, despite their skepticism, attacker agrees to not contact Master Kohga right away, and instead will bring the matter up with their boss. As collateral, though, it will be necessary that he is kept heavily restrained until it can be proven that he is not here on a sabotage mission. Several interrogations will follow for the next few days, sedatives will be administered as necessary, and any noncompliance will be met with unrelenting punishment.

Anderson reluctantly agrees, deciding that a few days of hell would be better than a lifetime and maybe more of unbearable agony. The attacker acknowledges, re-gags him twice over, blindfolds the man, and plugs his ears. They then shut off the light to the cell and secure the door, leaving to presumably report this new development to the boss. Anderson then experiences a full mental breakdown, crying and thrashing against his restraints until he passes out.

An approximate 16 hours pass before someone enters the cell, and removes the captive’s earplugs- but leaves all other forms of restraints in. This person is presumed to be the boss- and their footsteps can be heard pacing the cell as they begin to mark on the preposterousness of the captive’s story. Anderson cannot shake hearing a certain familiarity in the boss’s voice, but nonetheless is terrified of what is to come of the situation.

Very shortly after, boss slowly removes the blindfold. Is revealed to be the Captain Sonii of the Shiekah Marine Embassy, and she remarks on how this wouldn’t be the first time that the Yiga try to break in by pretending a part of the clan was betrayed by the others. However, she does admit that there is a certain sadness, fear, and fury in his eyes that she has not seen before.

Captain Sonii continues on by saying that she does know what there is a demon god that stands by the Yiga, and that Anderson must have done something drastic to anger the entity so much- to which the captive responds by squeezing his eyes shut and turning his head away. It seems that the Shiekah Captain is able to infer the source of his distress.

She goes on to remark that, if her intuition is correct, she could draw the fact that Anderson was falsely accused of treason, to which the captive replies with surprise and looks back at her. Captain Sonii chuckled and begins to explain that the whole reason the Shiekah Marine Embassy was founded was to give those who have been framed, misinterpreted, and accused a second chance. And she herself was one of those victims and built this army so no one would have to suffer the way she did, having no one to fall back on.

She concludes that, if there are no rescue attempts by any Yiga within the next three months, she will offer him a high-ranking position on the crew. However, until then, he is not to be left unrestrained, and under constant remote surveillance. Other stipulations follow, along with warning him that in the meanwhile he will be interrogated regarding both the Yiga Clan, and the events that conspired up until his capture.

She appears to snicker to herself, before producing a small knife, and explains how misinformation and fabrication are not tolerated. She begins to draw the knife very slowly up his throat, merely slitting the skin open and deliberately avoiding airways and major arteries, all the while making delicate yet terrifying threats about the consequences if he truly is lying and plans on sabotaging them.

He withholds his pain and terror- yet still in agreement with himself that as bad as things were now, they at least have an ending in sight. The captain notes his resilience, and reminds him of the stipulations one more time, before dismissing herself. Anderson seems relieved that she is gone, and several nightmares within the following few days about what would happen should he be captured by the Yiga confirm his confidence that this is the better option.

Over the following few months, his restrictions are gradually loosened, from a few weeks of full body restraints to a few weeks of wrist and ankle shackles and the allowance of basic entertainment, to simple handcuffs and special requests of food, to complete freedom to move about his cell and partake in recreations under supervision.

After a period of a little over three months, he is called in to be formally interviewed by the boss. He explains that his specialties lie in the operation of, hijacking, and repair of hardware is his specialty, along with an innate knowledge of robotics and machinery. He goes on to admit that he is the owner of a divine beast and use that divine beast in any missions they may need it for.

Under the agreement that she is allowed to connect the divine beast to the Embassy’s centralized army database, to which Anderson shows no opposition to, she hires him and as promised is given the title of leader of the tech division, more specifically the hardware sector, while he will be working aside another leader, August Staghorn, who oversees the software sector. He is given his own room and is now allotted all the freedoms and benefits of a level 3 crew member.

August and Anderson were initially very hesitant about one another, Anderson being intimidated by the software leader’s large stature and reluctance to speak, and August being intimidated by the hardware leader’s very apparent stoicism and distrust. However, as time goes on, they learn more about one another- Anderson learns that August is mute and communicates completely nonverbally (although he can hear and comprehend things perfectly fine), and August learns that Anderson suffers from a small case of Autism Spectrum Disorder and sometimes has trouble handling himself.

Both, in secret, study for months on end about the other’s problems; Anderson teaches himself to both use and interpret sign language, and August teaches himself how to effectively communicate with, comfort, and understand people with neurological disorders. They gradually become more compatible with one another, but neither seem to really notice any large change until they are put on a collaborative project together.

The two and their teams are instructed to begin work on a new semi-terrestrial divine beast construct. The ease at which they have communicating with one another seems to surprise them both, as each admits that they spent a long time studying how to communicate with the other more effectively. Upon realizing, both are overwhelmed with a feeling of rejoice and instantly embrace, getting emotional over one another.

August then goes onto admit that he had admired Anderson ever since he joined the tech division and heard about what happened to him beforehand. August expresses his empathy and admits that while his stature may be big, he considers himself to be rather meek. He reveals a bit more about himself, and states that the reason he was hired here was due to five or six years back, he was subject to a series of tests against his consent and ultimately had his vocal cords completely dissolved which led to him not being able to speak, and complications eating.

Due to these complications and receiving no compensation for the damage done, and the perpetrators never caught, he ended up losing the job he had and not being able to pay rent. He couldn’t find any new jobs either due to any hirer’s lack of understanding of his condition and refusing to change their policies. Ultimately he came down to Lurelin where he intended to spend what he presumed were his last days, alone.

However, at that time, the Shiekah Marine Embassy was surveying the area and they pulled August aside for questioning about his apparent loitering around the area. When he could not answer the soldier, he was asked to attend an interview with an interpreter and the boss, where he explained his story. The captain immediately could tell he had exceptional potential that others couldn’t see, and he was offered a position.

The two go on to discuss how the captain is quite the powerful woman; she clearly went through a lot of effort to found this army and is quite ruthless- but at the same time seems to have an innate understanding and compassion for those who have been wronged, just hidden behind a cold, yet ambitious exterior. Anderson admitted that he wasn’t so sure about her first, but soon came to realize that regardless of how tough she is, what was most important to him was her understanding.

August commentates that he knows about Anderson’s distrust of having a significant other and expressing affection and did not know how long it would take him to heal from that traumatic event. Regardless he confesses that he has feelings for Anderson, however, to the other’s surprise, reciprocates those same feelings, stating that he was truly taken back by how much August put into being able to communicate and understand him better, something that no one in the past had done before.

August humbly dismisses it as nothing more than something he was passionate about and should not be praised so highly for. Anderson intervenes, however, by mentioning that he knows that the two of them would not have studied each other’s issues without their knowledge if they were not meant for this. August cannot supply an argument against this, and thus, their relationship is made official.

 And so, life continues on, there are ups and downs, but one thing is certain- there’s definitely room for a whole series here.