#so much fun insight
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This is also a good point - key note that that people have a REASON to dislike him, which is that he talks shit about people constantly.
I personally haven't experienced much drawback to being on friendly terms with the Office Asshat, though? Especially by being Generally Friendly and Personable to everyone, I end up with a reputation as The Guy We Can Get to Talk to The Office Asshat So We Don't Have to, which is another valuable skill alfs;dkj. Become the neutral party
Some people do look at who you casually associate with and make assumptions based on that, but in my experience, unless you're ANNOUNCING that you, idk, went to Racist Joe's Klan meeting and had a great time and start defending them, people don't think much of who you're on friendly terms with. There are limits, ofc, but they're kinda extreme limits
The people that do keep obsessive tabs on other people... also tend to have bad reputations because that behavior is very annoying and untrustworthy asl;dfj. Same way I give people a sideeye when they dig up something someone posted six years ago as proof they're homophobic or whatever. Becky, yes, that tweet was problematic but he's been married to his husband for two years now. I think you need to let it go. Maybe get a more constructive hobby. Join a union. Mutual Aid organization. Something. Please.
However, and I think this is what the tags are actually trying to say but I tagged this autism for a reason and enjoy yapping: normal people WILL notice if you hang out with assholes - especially if you start picking up habits or turns of phrase from them. I had a coworker who I thought was totally chill even when he hung out with the generally annoying Asshat misogynist (who I was also the crowd-designated Handler of because I could tolerate his miserable existence lmao). I really liked Chill Guy. And then, one day, for no goddamn reason, Formerly Chill Guy and Asshat started shittalking their wives and daughters for the crime of... wanting to spend time with them/talking too much. Instant -10 respect. To this day I think less of both of them.
Networking/Knowing A Guy: A Guide
This is the autism website. Now, as an extension of the power of love and friendship, there are few things more useful than Knowing A Guy. Knowing A Guy means you have a support network. Knowing a plumber, or a tax accountant, or just that one dude that's really fucking good at finding the information you need when you're really overwhelmed, can be the difference between being able to pay rent and having a fun party with friends to fix your shit.
How does one end up Knowing A Guy? It's a skill you can develop called Networking and it is one of the foundations of society. Unfortunately making those connections with people is fucking hard and nobody makes a tutorial for it. So, here you go:
The golden rule is you scratch my back and I scratch yours
It is necessary for survival to seek out useful people
Great news! Everyone is useful in some form or fashion - including you! When given the opportunity to learn about someone, do it! Extroversion does not come naturally to some people and that's okay. Just take whatever falls in your lap.
Types of usefulness: trade skills, connections of their own, personality you jive with, pleasant to talk to, niche interest in shared hobby, security - the list is pretty much endless. I know a guy that lives in the metro area - no job, no major hobbies, inoffensively annoying to me personally, kinda ignorant, not attractive to me, but you know what? He knows how the fuck to get around the city by foot. My rural-raised ass APPRECIATES the guide.
Remember important information: general personality, background, skillset, likes and dislikes. You can find this information by making smalltalk about their life. There is no such thing as pointless conversation. (Yes, even the annoying smalltalk)
The more people you know, the higher the likelihood that one of them will be useful in a given situation - or will know someone who is.
It is overwhelming. In a given clique/community/workspace/whatever, there is A Guy Who Knows The Other Guys. This Guy is a shortcut. Find them. They're often elderly, extroverted, a little bit annoying, a secretary or in some otherwise forward-facing position. Look for people that are gossipy/talk about other people a lot but not in negative ways. If they constantly talk shit, they'll talk shit about you too. They're still useful but be careful with the information you share
You do not have to like someone for them to be useful.
You do not have to like someone for them to be useful.*
If you have low self esteem, you're going to feel like you're using people. You're not. That's the devil talking. People like feeling valued and the connections you are making are the threads holding community together. Recognize people for their talents. It's only a problem when you're taking advantage of people
So: don't feel scummy about it. You're an animal. You have to claw out your right to survive and people will respect you more for it.
Luckily mutualism is the name of the game in the animal kingdom. Offer something back. The foundation of a Know A Guy relationship is Mutual Benefit
Sometimes that Mutual Benefit is just spreading news of the The Guy far and wide. My plumber friend is my actual friend and I love her to death, but I'm maintaining our backscratch relationship by pimping out her plumbing business to anyone that'll listen
Food is a good Mutual Benefit. People across cultures for all of human history have bonded over food. I have good success asking people for a favor and then offering to buy them lunch in return **
General compensation is also good. Offer a service in return and always do your best to offer financial compensation as appropriate. Having your plumber friend take a look at your drain: doable with a case of beer. Having your plumber friend redo the pipes in your entire house? You need to pay for that.
Being transactional is not necessarily a bad thing. I would advise against keeping an itemized list of things owed, but fish don't seek out cleaner shrimp just because they enjoy their company. Everyone gets something
Unfortunately being extroverted and generally personable is a huge benefit here, but that's the value of the Guy That Knows A Guy. There's someone out there that has consolidated All The Guys so you don't have to be the local expert. Always remember nobody can do everything and you don't need to master every skill
* This is the foundation of a functioning community. I have many acquaintances that I find incredibly annoying. They include doctors, welders, artists, social workers, lawyers, construction crew and random fuckers at the grocery store. I do not hang out with them. I do not have to in order to maintain a civil Know A Guy relationship. I can drop them useful tidbits and fuck right off so I don't have to spend any more time than necessary with them
** People may assume romantic intent. Be prepared for that. I generally denote that it's a friendly/work lunch by calling them bro at some point if they're my age. Otherwise my general demeanor is sufficient to show that I do this with everyone
Source: personal experience, mother's teachings of crime, booth vending and poverty
#I did ask them both “Why are you even married if you don't wanna spend time with them” and they both went “Uh. I mean-”#fomreblog#also I am LOVING all the responses to this post#so much fun insight#sorry prev to yes- and you but it's such a good point and I want people to see it#I hope this does not come across critical in the slighest#I just think there's an important distinction between 'associating openly'#and 'being homies'#it also depends on the person in question#there are some people Bad Enough that. unless you make it clear you don't trust them either als;djf. people will get nervous#also I hope it's clear that I'm not saying to tolerate Racist Joe's bullshit#you don't need to tolerate things you morally disagree with#I'm just saying that being able to talk to Racist Joe when he's NOT being a douchebag doesn't mean other people are gonna think you suck to#they will if you start spouting racist shit too tho#so watch out
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Still thinking about Gortash’s coronation and how smoothly he cuts a Durge off from their companions (and wishing we had a follow up with that)
The first words out of his mouth are that he cares about them- anybody else who remembers Durge has only distain for them, but not him- he’s happy to see them, he missed them, they’re his favorite assassin and he’s only glad to see them alive
And then he takes it a step further by providing insight into their past, something Ketheric refused to do for them- and Gortash isn’t dumb. He knows exactly how Durge’s companions will react, knows that he’s effectively outing Durge when he so easily could have pulled them to the side instead
And when their companions snap at them and refuse to look at them, Gortash is still smiling. Suddenly, he’s the nicest person in the room. Suddenly, everything is unstable and dangerous- but he likes you. He’s sitting there with open arms while the companions are rightfully so mad with Durge, but Gortash is more than happy to resume their alliance
He’s more than happy to be their sole source of comfort again, and isn’t he just so sweet for that?
#anyways really wish we did have a follow up- it feels like he so very effectively gets between Durge and their companions#and all of the companions are rightfully mad at them#and then you just keep on trucking along and eventually it feels like that conversation didn’t happen#which is too bad- I think it could be a lot of fun to put more pressure on Durge and co#and I think it’s a fun insight into Gortash’s character#he’s remarkably honest during that whole conversation and it’s all incredibly manipulative#plus I like to think he knows how finicky durge can be- and how quickly they feel backed up against a wall when their friends snap at them#and there he is. conveniently offering a different option#conveniently offering for them to fall back into step#which is nifty! mostly because it’s both caring (as much as someone like Gortash knows how to) and super manipulative#durgetash#Durge#enver gortash#bg3#bg3 spoilers
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doodling my yttd faves
#battle sprite style#kostik draws#yttd#your turn to die#kimi ga shine#fanart#sou hiyori#shin tsukimi#gin ibushi#maple yttd#this is freeing im having fun#also wow my faves. nobody is surprised#mr split personality. mrs split personality. and woke dog#i seriously love them so much theyre all so me and beloved#this is all from memory so any inaccuracies were simply my divine insight
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NGL I have STRONG opinions about digital releases omitting the letters to the editor section of older comics. I feel like the letters are a part of comic history and should be aggressively preserved.
#look i was a weirdo and loved the letters so much#so much#so fucking damn much#i still to this day mourn that we don't have them#sometimes the editors would publish blatant aggressive criticism and promise to do better on some things#it was rare but it did happen in a handful of things involving stereotypes#also there is queer history in them such as in superboy and the ravers where people wrote in about hero#asking WHY he was not interested in women and this editor had to so professionally explain that he was GAY and where they stood on it#you also got to read queer readers writing in about these queer characters and the JOY in their words is priceless#also sorry but geoff's letters are fun and stupid at the same time and are a huge insight to what his hcs were#he LOVED tiny krypto so much it likely inspired him making dex starr bc he loved the idea of a small overly powered animal#not saying that was the main reason why ofc but it is interesting that he created dex after praising that mean little mutt#i say with the most love#my venting#my rambles
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narrative foil antagonism at its best
#this isn't meant to imply nanami is a saint or anything... it's just... you know... the parallels#anthy my darling i think you may have internalized a few things...#rewatching the series with anthy in mind lends so many new insights. i have so so so much fun during the cowbell episode#so there's so much more going on with each of these guys and their relationships to anthy#this isn't meant to be a meta critique encapsulating the full breadth of these characters#i could not fit a comprehensive saionji analysis in a meme even if i wanted to#but i would like her to be mean. soooo. mean. to everyone#although anthy does get to mess with most them throughout the series#but it would have been awesome to get a full saionji /chuchu episode. torment the shit out of that man anthy you go girl#and touga. and miki. hell even juri needs a lil wakeup call#juri arisugawa is barely hanging in there by a thread. my girls head is full of miserable toxic yuri and nothing else.#miki here too in all his purse dog glory#screeds#revolutionary girl utena#rgu#rgu spoilers#revolutionary girl utena spoilers#meme#mamemeos#rgu memes#anthy himemiya#nanami kiryuu#touga kiryuu#saionji kyouichi#miki kaoru#juri arisugawa#rgu student council#cw grooming mention#in case
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burn your village | female rage playlist
#f1#lewis hamilton#behold I share with you: witch!lewis#the drivers this man has had to contend with seb (❤️); nico; alonso; masa; max like JESUS CHRIST I KNOW YOURE A WITCH#it was v important for this to be dicordant and jarring#that was the most fun part tbh switching & subverting the tonal snaps#this is going to be a lidol series bc I went through my female rage paylist and thought wow... could definitely formula-one-fy this#im trying to be nonchalant but right as i started enjoying making this that STUPID article about lewis doubting himself came out -#and I almost unalived SICK AND TWISTED#anyway literally forever in awe of him.#that one clip from monza 2017 was v important to me bc how the fuck did Lewis take the championship lead from Ferrari IN MONZA#who scripted that. and all the booing and it was so. fucking? much?#always thanks to xavier who is attentive & constructive & insightful & understands every motif even if i am sure they are known only to me#and meg who is always lovely and kind when i send her literally the most BUSTED drafts that are 80% black screens
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Whumptober day 16- wound cleaning
I’ve been excited to share this one :) hope y’all like it
Warnings for a concussion and violent emotions
~~~~~
He was used to crowds of people watching him, laughing and cheering whenever he did something to exceed their expectations. The children that giggled as they watched him do his performance was always a sound he was used to, and in the beginning, he loved it. He loved being around children, enjoying their sweet, innocent minds, the way they saw whimsy in the world despite it being so evil, and it almost healed him from everything that happened to him at their age.
But now it was suffocating.
Creating puppets that danced around suddenly became insulting as he realized the true power he held; entertaining children and adults became stale and a waste of his time. He stopped finding joy in it, and now only desired power—power to keep the innocent children he used to love safe from people who wished them harm.
Yet the universe seemed to work against him, no matter how hard he tried. The heroes were working against him, and now these men—the strangers across eras—were working against him. They didn’t understand what he was trying to do though; they didn’t know the true evil that was in the world! He wanted to explain it to them, but he didn’t want to share some deep and personal things about himself to get them to understand.
They’d never understand anyways, who would? No one ever did.
“Hey, Seth.”
He looked up to see his fellow performer walking towards him, finishing yet another show in the mountains. His close friend, Dalton, was a phenomenal story teller, and narrated the stories he performed. Dalton was one of the reasons why he still did the performances, not wanting to worry him with his plans. But he wasn’t in the mood to talk to him right now; his head was aching from where that blasted Rito hit him, and the scratch marks on his face stung. He’d rather go somewhere else to rest, but Dalton wasn’t going to let him leave, clearly.
“Is everything alright? You seemed…. out of it back there,” he said, moving his head to get a better look at him, but Seth made sure to wear a veil to hide the scratch marks on his face.
“I’m fine. I’m just tired,” he muttered, hoping to get some alone time, but Dalton stopped him.
“Well, how about we head over to the Fallen Feather Inn? I hear they have good food there.”
He was hesitant, but was too tired to argue. Perhaps eating with his friend would help him clear his head. He’s been alone for a while now.
The two bid their farewells to the rest of the group and headed to the inn, which was on the other side of the village where they performed. The restaurant in the inn was crowded, probably due to the performance, but they were able to get a table quickly. Dalton sat across him, smiling his warm smile as he watched the people around him.
“I can’t believe how many people showed up here just for us!” He commented, watching a goron struggle to move through the crowd. “It’s almost flattering, don’t you think?”
He said nothing, and Dalton frowned.
“Why do you still have your veil on? We’re not performing.”
He paused, not wanting Dalton to see his face. There was going to be fussing and scolding and other things that he was not in the mood for. But he supposed he couldn’t hide it forever, he knew that. Dalton stared at him, his large brown eyes filled with worry and he finally sighed—best to get it over with.
Dalton gasped when Seth removed the veil, and he immediately grabbed a napkin and began dipping it in water.
“Goddesses, Seth! What happened to you?”
“It was just an accident,” he replied simply, not stopping him from dabbing the damp cloth against the scratches. It stung, but Dalton was gentle enough, his brow furrowed as he dabbed up the blood.
“I knew you going up the mountains by yourself wasn’t a good idea,” he said, moving the rag around so the clean side would touch his wound. “This might scar.”
“It’ll be fine. It’s just a scar.”
Dalton smiled and set the rag down, letting out a sigh. “Well, I’m glad whatever that was didn’t hit your eye.”
He nodded, avoiding eye contact. Dalton was silent for a moment, his brown eyes continuing to stare, as if waiting for him to say something, but he finally gave up and went back to people-watching. It was silent for a long moment, until Dalton spoke up again, a teasing grin on his face.
“How’s you and your lady friend? Hope things are going well?”
“I—things are fine.”
“That’s great! I hope you guys don’t elope, I’d hate missing out on being your best man!”
Seth couldn’t hold back the smile. “We’ve only seen each other for a month.”
“Yes, but… you know… anything could happen! I thought I wasn’t gonna marry my wife but here we are!”
He smiled again. Dalton’s wedding was beautiful, and he was so grateful to be a part of it. He wished life was like that again, just… full of joy. But he had more important things to worry about now.
“I don’t think there will be a wedding,” he said, and Dalton sighed.
“Aw, you don’t think it’s working out?”
“It’s… complicated.”
Dalton frowned, but he glanced up at a person who walked up to them and smiled. “Hello!”
He glanced up as well, and felt his heart leap to his throat.
“Hey, what can I get for you two?” The short man asked, his long, curly brown hair tied back and his dark eyes watching them.
Benji.
They were here, the men were here! Seth scanned the restaurant, spotting Leon yelling at a man and Linebeck walking through the crowds of people. Panic settled in, and he instinctively covered his face with the veil, pretending to look at the menu. Goddesses they were here.
But…why were they here? What were they doing waiting tables? He killed one of them, didn’t he? Seth glanced at where Leon stood, his arm in front of a young woman while he yelled at a screaming customer. He… didn’t look like he was mourning… did…
Did Rusl survive?
“Seth.”
He looked up, seeing Dalton and Benji staring at him. Dalton’s head was tilted and he had a forced smile on his face, while Benj had a blank expression. Did he recognize him? No… he doesn’t know what he looks like under the mask. There’s no way. Yet anxiety gnawed at his insides as Benji stared, almost as if he could see right through him.
“I—I’ll just have whatever you’re having,” he mumbled, and Benji leaned forward.
“What was that?”
“I-I–”
“He’ll have what I’m having,” Dalton answered for him, and Benji nodded, walking away. It was silent for a moment before Dalton turned to him, a worried expression on his face. “What’s wrong? You seem nervous all of the sudden?”
Seth turned away, glaring. “Nothing, I’m just not hungry.”
“Really? Then why’d you get what I got? I ordered a lot of food.”
He said nothing, and kept glancing at the men that have been tormenting him for weeks. They were all too chipper for their friend who died a week ago. Anger bubbled in his chest as he realized that his plan to get rid of them was crumbling in his hands, dripping through his fingers like the sands in the desert. Rusl must’ve survived, there was no other explanation. Why couldn’t they just die?
Dalton began striking up conversation again, but he stopped listening. Most likely they didn’t know that he was here, which meant that he could ambush them and finally be rid of them. Yes, things were perhaps looking up for him finally.
He just needed to find out where they were staying, and then he would strike.
~~~~~
It was dead silent as he walked carefully around the building, the only light available being the moon and the stars. Everyone was fast asleep except for him, allowing him to use his training to be in and out in seconds. There were perks to being raised Sheikah he supposed.
He discovered that the men were on the third floor right next to a wall, which was inconvenient, but nothing he couldn’t handle. With one quick jump, he was able to climb to the top and carefully open the window. He took pride in that fact that he made no noise as the window opened, and he quietly jumped inside, his boots barely making a sound against the carpet. His breathing was soft and quiet, and any loud breath was muffled by his mask, making him as quiet as the night. To his relief, he was in the correct room, with Leon and Benji asleep near the couch. He could’ve killed them right then and there, but he was admittedly curious about something, and he instead turned to one of the rooms.
Very carefully, he opened the door, stopping when he heard snoring coming from the armchair in the corner. There rested Talon, who was laid back in the chair, which looked to be uncomfortable, but he supposed it was comfortable enough to sleep in it. But what caught his eye was the blasted Ordonian, resting in the bed with his arm in a sling, his eyes closed and softly snoring, and looking very much alive.
He clenched his fists in anger. His plan was perfect—perfect! He was to control either Rusl or Leon for their sword skills and then use them to kill the others! If not, he’d at least be able to kill them! How could such a foolproof plan fail? How could he survive?
Seth brought out the knife hidden in his belt, moving carefully across the room to where Rusl laid, and he lifted it above his head. He was going to end this once and for all.
But before he could bring the dagger down on Rusl’s throat, something hit the back of his head, and he stumbled forward before falling unconscious, the pain being the last thing he felt.
And then he awoke, his hands tied behind his back and Leon and Benji watching him with furious looks on their faces. They were out in the living room again, this time with a candle lit, and Seth found himself tied to a stand that at least kept him in place. His mask was spotted sitting on the couch, and any weapon he had was stripped off of him. He blinked a few times to clear his head, and he looked up at the two, glaring.
“I knew it,” Benji growled, not moving. “I knew it was you, puppeteer.”
“What gave me away?” Seth asked, his words slurred slightly.
“That stupid headpiece of yours! You think I wouldn’t recognize it even with your hair down?”
Seth blinked, realization hitting him. The moon headpiece he always wore was a gift from Dalton when they first started performing. Dalton had the Sun, while he had the moon. He never thought to take it off.
Goddesses, how could he be so foolish?
“I see,” was all he said, and Leon stepped up, his sword drawn.
“Did you come here to finish the job then? To undo all the hard work we did to heal Rusl?” He asked, his voice as sharp as his blade.
“Of course I did,” Seth said coolly. “But I see that I made a mistake and was caught in the act. I guess he escapes death once again. You all do.”
Leon suddenly lunged at him, grabbing a fistful of his clothes and pulling him close, their noses inches apart.
“You’re sick, you know that?” He seethed. “All you have done is cause us pain and suffering, and I’m tired of it! I’m tired of you!”
Seth didn’t react, and instead he stared straight into Leon’s blue eyes, fury dripping off of them as if they’d kill Seth right then and there.
“What are you going to do then?” He asked, testing Leon’s limits. The man simply pressed his blade up against Seth’s throat, closing the gap between them where he could feel his breath.
“I’m ending this,” he simply said, readying his hand to slit his throat. But Seth only laughed, shaking his head.
“You’re all too slow.”
He finished untying the knot around his wrists and he kicked Leon in the neck, sending him flying back into the couch. In one motion, he rolled back and pushed himself up with his arms, kicking off the wall and leaping over the couch, grabbing his mask.
“Wait—“ Benji shouted, but he was cut off when Seth kicked him in his teeth, sending him to the ground. He would’ve done more, but the door to the other room was torn open, with Ammon on the other side holding his sword.
Seth was too exposed, too weak, too unprepared to fight against them all. He needed to retreat.
Without giving Ammon the chance to attack, Seth teleported, disappearing in a cloud of smoke before reappearing outside under the window. He stumbled, his head stinging worse than before, but he somehow found the momentum to run away from the inn despite stumbling like a drunkard from the path.
It was humiliating, admitting defeat like this, but he didn’t know what else he could’ve done, he was too vulnerable and injured to commit to such a battle. But by the goddesses, he was not going to let them get away with it.
He was going to make them pay for everything.
~~~~
The town was quiet that early morning, with only a few people doing errands and chores, but Seth paid them no mind as he marched to the inn, with the village guards following closeby.
He barged right in, ignoring the young woman who went to greet him, and he marched up to the innkeeper, who looked surprised to see them.
“Oh, hello,” she greeted, putting a letter in her apron. “What can I do for ya boys?”
“Some men staying here assaulted me, so they’re here to arrest them,” Seth simply answered, pointing to the two guards. The innkeeper frowned and leaned against the wall.
“Who?”
“Your servers,” he said, “they were staying here on the third floor.”
She paused. “They weren’t stayin’ here, you got the wrong folks, honey.”
Seth glared. “No, I have the right ones. The servers you had yesterday: the short brown haired man, the tall brown haired man, and the golden haired? They were here, at the third floor where they held me hostage!”
“I’m sorry to hear that honey, but they weren���t stayin’ here. I don’t know where they were stayin’, but it’s not my business to know where my employees are—“
“You’re obviously covering for them!” Seth snapped. He turned to the guards who looked mildly uncomfortable. “Search the room! I know exactly where they are!”
He ignored the innkeeper’s protests and marched right to the stairs, leading the guards to the room on the very top floor. The guards checked the door before beginning to ram it, but the innkeeper stopped them.
“Hey! At least let me open it the way it’s supposed to!” She yelled, pushing her way through and unlocking the door. “Goddesses, do ya know how much these doors cost? It would set me back having to replace one!” The door unlocked and she swung it open. Seth barged in, only to stop dead in his tracks.
The room was completely empty. The living room, the two bedrooms, all void of people; it didn’t even look lived in.
“I toldja no one was stayin’ up here,” the innkeeper said, twirling her key around her finger. “You must’ve hit your head hard or somethin’ honey. You should check for a concussion at the doctor.”
Seth only stared in disbelief. This was the right place, it had to be. He saw Benji enter it the night before, he was tied to the coat stand right in the corner! How was it cleared out and cleaned so fast? How did they escape?
“Sir, we’re going to have to agree with Ms. Shirley here,” one of the guards said, placing a hand on his shoulder. “Let’s take you to the doctor, and we’ll do a thorough sweep to find these men that hurt you. But they are clearly not here.”
His hands were shaking—from anger, from confusion, from his injury, from all his emotions crashing down on him at once. He wanted to scream, he wanted to throw things, he wanted to strangle the innkeeper and he wanted to beat the guards until they couldn’t move anymore. But instead he let himself be escorted out, leaving the empty room behind him.
The guards and the innkeeper were talking quietly while Seth stared ahead, having hundreds of thoughts run rampant through his head, but being unable to focus on one. He didn’t notice the guards leading him to the doctor’s, and he didn’t notice them leaving him alone where the healers began to treat his injury. He felt numb.
As his head was being treated, he was finally able to focus on one thought, one thought that made him furious, rageful, but determined.
He wasn’t going to let them escape again. He didn’t care what he had to do or who he had to trample over, but he was going to find those men.
And he was going to end them.
#whumptober#whumptober 2024#I had so much fun writing the puppeteer guys#strangers across eras#smiles writes#the art isn’t that good and the writing is flaws but#I hope it makes up for the crappy past few days#I was also up late working on the art so whatever#y’all are getting some insight on the guy hehe#didn’t have time to refine this#I’m doing everything last minute gang#dalton’s such a sweetheart
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Alexander Anderson · Hellsing
#i contribute#my art#alexander anderson#hellsing#favorite#--#experimenting with colors and texture#this was A LOT of fun to do#i have struggled with drawing this mans face#SO MUCH#that being able to draw it#and actually have the peace of mind to ENJOY drawing that scar and the cracks around that face?#ooooooooooooh#absolute bliss i say#along with a joke#about how I'm ace#and actually used a stuffed animal of a cat to draw those abs#but heyyyyyyyyyyyyy#if you read these tags?#you have earned the right to that insight
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this is so stupid but i always have fun imagining the milgram characters watching their own/others mvs and seeing their reactions, especially for MeMe
That’s not stupid at all, thank you so much for the ask!! It’s sooo interesting to think about! I planned on just posting this drabble, but the more I thought about it, the more I started jotting down headcanons for everyone 👀 Of course there’s the initial disbelief and shock that Milgram can really do what it claims, but once they accept that, they’d have a lot of interesting reactions…
Es gets to watch the video first, then the prisoners are free to watch their own in the privacy of the courtroom/extraction room/wherever. Other prisoners can watch them only with explicit permission from the video’s singer. No one is allowed to watch Undercover except for Es. At first they spend hours looking at those final frames of themself flinching from the camera, hoping to jog any sort of memories, but eventually they give up on it. While actually watching it, they don’t mind the murder silhouettes. While sleeping, however, it has triggered more than one nightmare.
Haruka: He thinks Weakness is very pretty – he’s amazed seeing himself on the screen and hearing his voice, knowing he’s not that good of a singer. Even before his innocent verdict, it gives him a huge surge of confidence. Once he gets to know the others better, he gives them mv permissions, then stares intently at their faces to see their reactions as they watch it. AKAA scares him a bit, seeing his own intense emotions on screen, and he only gives Muu permission to see it. When he’s alone, Haruka pauses the shots of his mother, just to stare for a while.
Yuno: Laughs at the symbolism her mind used in Umbilical. She’s never shied away from sexual words/thoughts, so it's funny the video was as tame as it was. She thinks the song is fun, and isn’t afraid to show the others and sing snippets of it around the prison. Some days it’s too emotional for her to get into it, but most of the time she tries to display a confident attitude about it. After Tear Drop, she’s satisfied with her anger and more overtly sexual images. If anything, she feels too exposed by the shots of herself looking more vulnerable/sad.
Fuuta: He experiences a solid mix of embarrassment at the gaming theme in Bring it On and feeling a surge of pride that he looks badass in the knight’s armor. He’s worried the warden won’t take him seriously with the video game obsession, but he absolutely loves the song and thinks it portrays his toughness and ideals well. He’s less thrilled with Backdraft, everything about it unsettles and embarasses him. He’s thrown by the shot of crossing out his own silhouette – he’d had self-harming thoughts, but wasn’t quite ready to confront them so blatantly yet. Like Haruka, he can be caught pausing the arcade shot just for a moment before turning the whole thing off and storming away.
Muu: She has mixed emotions towards After Pain. She hates seeing herself look so weak and pathetic, but it gives her a lot of hope that her story will be understood. She misses her friends, and seeing them again is bittersweet. She closes her eyes at the moment of the stabbing – she’s only gotten the courage to watch it through her fingers once. She watches INMF once, then refuses to look at it again from shame/horror. Despite Haruka’s begging, she doesn’t let him watch it, either.
Shidou: He asks Es what they saw in Throw Down. Upon finding out his family wasn’t in it, he chooses not to watch it. He believes he already knows all about his emotions and crime, so there’s no need to go through that pain again. He’s tempted to watch it when he’s confused about Es’ verdict, but still holds off. He does watch Triage when informed his family is in it. He spends hours in front of the screen by himself. Only after seeing that one does he watch Throw Down, though he’s still left confused about Es’ decisions.
Mahiru: Absolutely loves TIHTBILWY. She thinks it perfectly describes her situation, and that the song is very cute. She lets others watch it, and unlike Yuno, feels like singing it 24/7. It reminds her of her bf, and she thinks that’s very romantic. Similar to Shidou, she spends a lot of time watching I Love You just to look at her boyfriend. She shows it to everyone, just to show him off and talk about him, even if she does skip over the beginning and end each time.
Kazui: He is very similar to Shidou; he refuses to watch his videos until T2, assuming it would be too painful to watch something he already knows and wishes to avoid. Unlike Shidou, seeing Hinako is far too painful, and he regrets watching it and seeing her so happy on their wedding day. Though maybe he’s still waiting, and hasn’t seen any of the videos yet…
Amane: Magic makes her worry more than anything. She fears she’s poisoned by unnecessary vainness since so much of her video involves cute things, colors, outfits, animals, and is set up like a tv show. She’s also worried that Es and the others will really see her as a child because of how cute the whole thing is. She prevents herself from watching it too many times, but buried under all her fears, it gives her a surge of pride seeing herself so talented and pretty and the star of the show. Purge March only reaffirms her confidence in her crime – the video brings up some awful memories, but it shows her as a leader, a warrior, a hero! It brings her comfort and confidence more than anything.
Mikoto/John: The videos are distressing to both of them, and they spend all their time studying the others’ screentime. Mikoto watches in horror as John does things that line up with his spotty memories, and John panics seeing that his actions distress Mikoto more than they’ve reassured/saved him. John does end up watching his own scenes a few times – it feels incredibly good to appear in a way that Mikoto may finally notice him. He feels seen. Now, logically I think that MeMe would be the final tipping point in which Mikoto finally accepts the situation and his DID, but if I must stick to his canon denial, then I’d say he goes on a whole rant about movie magic andt the crazy things you can do with editing nowadays. He doesn’t have a good explanation on how Milgram found his home and knew so much about him, but he explains everything away as cgi or camera effects. Double manages to sway him a bit more, as he hears John speak so plainly to him. Just as the audience had some debate on who was apologizing at the end of Double, Mikoto and John wonder who is apologizing to whom. Though they both come to the conclusion it’s their own apology, they decide that if it was the others’, they’d accept it and forgive them.
Kotoko: She’s very pleased with Harrow, and is unashamed to show it to the others. Though she’d been able to watch a few of the previous prisoners’ videos, it still shakes her a bit when she realizes that Milgram really does have the tech to look deep inside her. She watches it just a few times – not obsessing over it, but not afraid either. Deep Cover, however, is a once-and-done sort of deal. She claims she’s not letting the others watch it because “they couldn’t handle such harsh but true criticisms about themselves,” but she doesn’t end up watching it anymore herself, either.
#milgram#es#haruka sakurai#yuno kashiki#fuuta kajiyama#muu kusunoki#shidou kirisaki#mahiru shiina#kazui mukuhara#amane momose#mikoto kayano#kotoko yuzuriha#thank you so much! and for being patient 😅#i didnt mean to take so long but i kept chipping away at ideas while i got to this one#these were so much fun to think about!! i went for more emotional ones here but i do have silly thoughts too#i have that silly post about them making a competition after seeing each others mvs#though -even if they dont make it outwardly a big deal like that#i think they definitely would silently compare their videos/crimes to each others and decide whose was better#i still stand by the fact that fuuta asks kotoko if shes a furry after seeing harrow sdfasdf#i cant imagine kazui allowing anyone in the prison to watch his but IF he did#fuuta would also ask if he was a furry after cat ADSFSADF#i think the reactions t1 would be pretty positive/comforting#but in t2 theres a lot less pleasantries and compliments#aside from the obvious deep insights the videos give i think theyd reveal a lot of sweet similarities#like appreciation for flowers or cooking or performance or video games or music genres#but by t2 everyones on edge and suspicious of each other#or ashamed themself :(#i think its really cool imagining who would want to share theirs and who would keep theirs private...#rose posts
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love it when a character that's hard to read intuitively for you has like a dedicated fandom interpreter who can just glance at their blank face in a panel and then give you a 3k word essay on their innermost thoughts & desires & fears and neatly tie it back into the themes & whatnot as if it's the most obvious thing in the world
#im talking about griffith btw#guts i feel i get intuitively - maybe because i have some personality traits in common with him#and we get more about his life concretely told to us in canon. so he is a bit easier to pin down as a character and feel attached to for me#but whenever i was reading the manga i just kept wanting more insight about griffith's actions and feelings#like ok yeah its fun to have mysterious antagonists and suspense /tension etc but its also fun to feel like you deeply understand them too#and i felt like that was a bit missing from him for me in canon#so reading about him in analysis and fics is the most fun for me rn#he always felt kinda half unreal to me- which maybe was the point of him - but i wanted a bit more about his childhood or something?#and wished we had more stuff explicitly from his pov in the story to read or explanation about his transformation or wtv#and now he's so much more closed off to me even than he was in the golden age. i keep waiting for him to explain stuff and he does not#ANYWAYS all this rambling to say some people out there are very good at interpreting him and making his like. insecurities#more obvious to me bc i didnt really get that side of him from canon intuitively well#also im really enjoying reading the first few berserk fics ive read#there may not be a ton of them out there but there is def writing talent in the fandom#i'll share some recs once i'm done sifting through most of what's out there to read#also (not to tie everything back to death note but it IS my home fandom after all)#i feel griffith is obvs the more light-like character here and L maybe a bit guts-like? but unlike berserk in death note#light is the one you get to know best and L is the mysterious / unreal one you don't get a lot of concrete insight into#and in the DN fandom I can read the more mysterious character intuitively but had to warm up to the less mysterious one instead#and the mystery of L makes sense to me and doesnt bug me as much due to like - he HAS to hide a lot about himself or else he will die lol#so some similarities there but also some opposite feels as well#berserk spoilers#p
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do you have any thoughts on viv x blackwall friendship dynamic?
- 🪄
I DO, ACTUALLY! thank you so much for the ask!!!
i think it is a very strained friendship, if one can even call it "friendship". they both perceive the other to be something they are staunchly against. vivienne views the wardens as being unnecessary/dated at best and predatory/dangerous at worst, and blackwall views vivienne to be a pampered noble lady who's willingness to get involved with the inquisiton and her subversion of his expectations of her makes her suspicious. vivienne sees blackwall as a puppy because of his eagerness to matter, and blackwall sees vivienne as a snake because of the cunning that allows for her survival.
(i've barely touched on this before but i do think the fact that vivienne is a woman plays into how blackwall goes about interacting with her. he would not be speaking to her in their banter with the same manner if vivienne were a man, and i think that's important to note.)
i think there is only a very small window where vivienne and blackwall could reasonably be considered friends, and it would have to be after haven falls but before blackwall is revealed to be thom rainier. in my mind it is a friendship of necessity; neither particularly likes the other, but they are fighting together alongside the inquisitor and share a common goal. it's hard to be constantly at someone's throat when you're spilling blood with them and then patching up their wounds afterwards. and they are both defenders! keeping the rest of their team safe is something both vivienne and blackwall care deeply about, and if nothing else, that protectiveness is something to bond over. even if blackwall struggles to see vivienne's care for what it is and vivienne thinks blackwall's viewpoint is vastly naive.
vivienne and blackwall aren't as different as they think, either! they're both free marcher commoners who have had to carve out a place for themselves in orlais as foreigners, but vivienne succeeded in finding a place for herself and blackwall lost that place when he took that bribe and allowed his men to kill a family of innocents. blackwall allowed his own selfishness to get the best of him at the cost of others– something vivienne has not done, and i think that conficts with the view blackwall has on nobility and soldiers, or authority in general. a soldier is just a man following orders to him– the ones commanding the soldiers are the ones to blame for any wrongdoing. but vivienne does not order soldiers. she is a "noble lady" to him, but takes matters into her own hands and puts herself at risk while blackwall once allowed his men to take the fall for himself. this defying of expectations rattles blackwall and he projects a lot of his own insecurities onto her.
vivienne doesn't know any of this, of course, until after blackwall is revealed to be thom rainier. and i do not think vivienne would be forgiving of that deception. she'll play somewhat nice so long as the inquisitor is willing to keep blackwall around, but blackwall being willing to allow his men to slaughter a family for his own gain and then spending years hiding from it? treating her as being suspicious and manipulative when he was the one lying all along? yeah. she's not just letting that go. especially if she happened to start actually liking him somewhere in all of that, and considering she eventually ended up caring for cole? it's not that big of a reach to think she did the same for blackwall.
it's especially juicy if vivienne personally knew the family that blackwall had his men kill, as vincent callier was an ally of celene and vivienne was celene's advisor. or even if rainier was someone vivienne previously took interest in when he was in the army because he was a free marcher like she was. there's a lot of potential in their dynamic!! they're soo fun to think about
i have like half an old fic written of blackwall helping patch up vivienne after a fight while they're seperated from the rest of the party that digs into their dynamic a bit,, mayhaps i will finish it if people are interested
#ask#anon 🪄#dragon age#dai#dragon age inquisition#vivienne#vivienne de fer#vivienne dragon age#da:i#blackwall#thom rainier#blackwall dragon age#i wrote so much for this djdbsbbs but this was super fun!!!#just (kicks rocks) vivienne's dynamics with the other companions could be sooo deep and cool. if anyone bothered to dig into them.#blackwall as well#also not to be like “vivienne didnt get a chance to shine in dai” again but it drives me up the damn wall that vivienne is supposed#to be such a good player of the game and super insightful but doesnt expect anything from blackwall. like nothing?? none??#anyways. theyd hate each other but there was a moment where they almost didnt.
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Have you read the 'day in the life' prequel comic where Alastor saved the random sheep demon?
I have 🥺 I adore it. It's such good insight into Alastor and his moral compass. Viv has said that Alastor is chaotic neutral aligned and lives by his own moral code, and hhhhhh I want to know more SOOOO bad.
Considering we're going to see more of his backstory in season 2, I really hope we get more examples of his moral code.
#i love that comic SO so much#its such a fun insight into his character#and what he does and does not do#we know he doesn't condone violence against woman!#love that!!!#also I want to know more about the Sinners who show up as animals like the sheep demon#like ones who look super innocent and soft#we've seen bunnies sheep and Alastor himself is a deer#lets see more woodland animals#asks#anon#anonymous#alastor
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personal lyric analysis series (5/?): jet skis on the moat - arctic monkeys
references under the cut
Arctic Monkeys (2022). Jet Skis On The Moat [Song]. Domino Recording Co Ltd.
[1] Lobb, A (2022, September 29). Exclusive: 7 things we learned from Alex Turner about new Arctic Monkeys album The Car. Big Issue. https://www.bigissue.com/culture/music/exclusive-7-things-alex-turner-revealed-to-us-about-new-arctic-monkeys-album-the-car/
[2] @franklyimissparis (2024, May 8). jet skis on the moat: a queer-coded line-by-line lyrical analysis. Tumblr. https://www.tumblr.com/franklyimissparis/749921580956729344/jet-skis-on-the-moat-a-queer-coded-line-by-line?source=share
[3] Radio X (2022, October 20). Arctic Monkeys - The Car track by track | X-Posure | Radio X [Video]. YouTube. https://youtu.be/8qX-vBSpLe0?si=ewA1nfm46K-JxaM-
#alex turner#arctic monkeys#the car#jet skis on the moat#lyrics theories#jules.rar#analyses on al's lyrics#i'm EXHAUSTED and it's 2:30am and i have a class at 9:30am and looool how is it gonna go (it won't)#anyways. i had so much fun with this one. this song /became/ one of my favourites because of this silly little project#also thank you @franklyimissparis your analysis is just gold and truly insightful!#same disclaimer but:#again please keep in mind that it’s just my personal thoughts on alex’s work and you’re utterly welcome to discuss them!#queue
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Don't get me wrong, I LOVE the current enix manga and anime. But I also wish this dialogue was added in (I haven't read the early volumes of LN but I would assume this was in the LN since the mangas are based from it)
But THIS LINE. Is Maomao's entire belief. Throught out the anime, manga, LN etc, we always see her reluctant to point out or give obvious clues as to whoever it is that have done something and could be punished by death. Not only because duh, don't speculate. But also she's mentioned several times, that she doesn't want to be responsible for it
If an apothecary is supposed to save and support those who wishes to keep living, what does it say about her if she sent someone to the gallows -despite of what they've done- who still wishes and wants to live?
Like idk i might be reading too much, but when I read this from the GX it was like a freaking lightbulb moment because she DOES have this belief. She doesn't want to send someone to the gallows, despite them deserving it. And it just. Uggggggggghhhhhh
#DAMN#seriously i am having so much fun reading the gx#theyre so different and yet the same and yet so differenttttt#its so good#like you get all these new insights i am insaneeeeeeee#the apothecary diaries
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set out to create a serious, canonesque drawing with which to say "feel free to go in my lackadaisy tag and help me mystery speculate" but only got going when i made it bowling and the rarepair agenda
#not that i imagine anything w/mordecai's Rare so much as: diluted range of possibilities lol. probably someones on that mordecai/virgil life#when it turns out it takes several tries to start to get more solid footing at drawing characters for the first time: What The?????#i actually don't think i ever tried drawing lackadaisy before; against all odds....if i had i would've had a head start lol#lackadaisy#corned beef#any collectively used pairing name here? mordenico? nicodecai? in absence of otherwise Knowing:#nicodeme savoy#mordecai heller#me in '07 going oh my GOD this ART!!!! me in '23 going oh my GOD this ART!!!! & guess how i've always felt years in between#goddd perusing the gallery bonus art afresh recently just like WOWWW i'm SOOO#the collages of full-body drawings for book purchases i think like my GOD i love to see it. plus that the Extra Stuff gallery means there's#such a variety like. stuff that's clearly noncanon; stuff that could be / kinda is; jokes; portraits; story / characters insight....waaughh#also shoutout to everyone behind all the mordecais in KS Backer Art 1 & 2 like ''sexy mordecai please'' apparently lmao. hell yeah#anyways my Marigold Bowling Team headcanons are simple and straightforward: nicodeme w/the muscle can get a strike from the force of having#hit one pin that smashes into all the others; but don't underestimate his versatility. mordecai with the precision / method & absolutely#who you want trying to hit the only pin left on the lane. serafine's got like serpentine curveballs changing velocity halfway down the lane#and they've All got pointing a gun at the people setting pins / returning balls b/c that wasn't automated back in the twenties#back when everyone had customized printed tees....oh fun fact. a real live kitty cat crinkled that first pic's paper by jumping on it#or really; ricocheting off of it. classic#also the ''i want people to seriously consider nicodeme/mordecai. but also sillily'' purposes have me using Close Contact as a shorthand#it's earnest and can sure be [longhand] too but you go ''You Could Never HC Datingly Affection ft. An Always Touch Averse Character'' & i?#well i scoff derisively and slowly swivel my chair around to face you; arms crossed; smhing....hah. how greatly you underestimate my power.#you're throwing [hcs for a romance ft. an autistic character] & [that ft. an asexual character] & i'm grabbing them midair & Sips Them#ha ha why these replenish my health And experience bars....#Never Be Afraid To Forget To Draw Mordecai's Glasses Or That You Also Put Your Thumb In A Bowling Ball....he's warming up. or w/e.#nicodeme w/the boxing experience shoulders massage trope. giving that pep talk#or you can go ''get a strike or we kill you'' b/c you never have to find out if he's joking or not#mordecai unfazed b/c that's the stakes in this business (bowling) & he's autistic so always having to ignore Everyone being weird/confusing#haven't come up with a lackadaisy's team bowling pun name lol.#still feel free to go in my lackadaisy tag and help me brainstorm mitzi n mordecai's murder mystery ;w; enrichment
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Bedrock Headcannons: Captain Rex
Bedrock headcannons are headcannons that I regard as a fact in the personality of a character I write about. They range from small details to a huge part of a character's backstory. These headcannons are a constant underlayer in all of my fics that involve these characters.
﹄『❝ Rex ❞』﹃
Rex is the clone that fell out of the gunship with Padme in AOTC and when Anakin found out, his fondness for Rex was instant.
Rex and Padme hang out regularly now. Padme invited Rex over for lunch countless times before Anakin even knew. The two were watching some holodrama talking shit about the characters when Anakin came in beyond confused to see Rex, because how did Rex not tell him this? Anakin panicked thinking he was gonna have to pull out an excuse but Rex just downed his apple juice and told him to sit down because he was blocking the TV.
Anakin was very surprised that Padme didn't tell him that she told HIS Captain they were married. And that Rex didn't bring it up. Anakin feels a little left out because the two of them have inside jokes and matching apple juice glasses.
Rex's favorite drink is apple juice and Padme always has some in her fridge for him.
He is not a loud emotions type of guy. He cannot handle it and wants to evaporate from the situation. He'd be teamed up with Ahsoka and maybe she'd start crying or get really mad and starts yelling. Rex doesn't know how to respond. Anakin will laugh loudly and pull Rex into a side hug and he just shuts down. He doesn't know what he'd say because he's so scared of saying the wrong thing.
Rex is a natural blond.
Anakin had explained to Rex he'd never have a padawan, Rex very much agreed. The battlefield wasn't a place for a child. But then Ahsoka came and at first, Rex resented this grubby little kid who kept asking him for his snacks. But then they'd be on the bridge watching blaster fire and she'd grab his hand, scared of getting hurt. Ahsoka started waking up in the middle of the night and find Rex because unlike Obi-Wan and Anakin, he wouldn't tell her that everything was okay, he'd just sit with her in the dark so she knew she was safe. He didn't know when he started considering Ahsoka his little sister, but she'd always considered him her brother.
Rex has a crush on Anakin that he thinks is quite inconvenient because he thinks Anakin is ugly. But then Anakin will make him laugh or smile at him and Rex feels like his heart is going to stop.
After Ahsoka left the order, Rex reached out countless times. He wanted to talk to her, give her credits he borrowed from Anakin's wallet, tell her to go crash at Padme's because she has a really nice guest bedroom, he wanted to give her hug and tell her that she'd always be his little sister. But she never answered him, she never reached out, she never even said goodbye.
Rex was the first person Padme told that she was pregnant, so for nine months, Rex couldn't say anything to Anakin. Rex thought he might explode. They'd already lost Ahsoka, but in nine months maybe Anakin wouldn't be so unhappy? Maybe his heart wouldn't be so broken? Maybe Ahsoka would come back and they'd be a family again- In nine months, Rex knew everything would change.
Everything did change. Ahsoka came back, but Rex never saw Anakin again and there was no Padme, there was no babies. Their family never healed, it only fell apart.
After Order 66, Rex broke. He didn't have anything left within him. He clawed at the dirt and debris in desperate search for his brothers until his fingers were smashed. He'd search for days and Ahsoka would find him often passed out from dehydration and exhaustion. If he managed to sleep, he'd wake up screaming, he didn't want to scare Ahsoka more than he already had been, so he tried to stop sleeping. But that only scared her more, she couldn't lose him too, she wouldn't survive it. Rex didn't speak, he always had a distant look on his face, he was paralyzed by grief. For weeks, Rex was unable to do anything but sit silently in his grief because if he spoke then he'd yell and he didn't want to yell because then it'd all come out. "Why'd you take my chip out? Why didn't you just kill me?"
﹄『❝ Rex ❞』﹃
#Rex and Padme are besties#and Anakin is jealous#because neither one gives him ANY insight on their friendship#Rex and Padme always laugh and make fun of Anakin#ironically#the reason they get along so well is because they both love Anakin so much#but man is Anakin STUPID#and that's what they talk about#how stupid their Jedi is#their friendship is everything to me#leave me alone#star wars#clone wars#tcw#sw#captain rex#anakin skywalker#ahsoka tano#padme amidala
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