#so maybe I’ll get to everything else eventually
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frannyzooey · 2 days ago
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Warriors
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Merry Christmas @papurgaatika !! I am your Secret Santa, and I had a blast writing this for you ❤️ We share a first love of Din and writing this made me realize just how much I've missed him! I hope this is everything you wished for and more -- and I hope you have an amazing holiday!! 🎄❄️🎄❄️
Pairing: Din Djarin x f!reader
Rating: Explicit
--
You first spotted him on the outer reaches of the galaxy. 
His beskar armor demanded to be seen, a surprising choice for someone who worked in the shadows. But while the first time you saw him was a flash at the edge of the market, it wasn’t the first time he had seen you. 
He’d been watching you for weeks. 
The bounty on your head was a high one: a disgruntled old boss with a lot of credits, and even more vindictiveness. You’d been skipping from planet to planet, earning anything you could from spare jobs, and stealing whenever you had to. You knew your luck had to run out one day, but you always thought you’d be able to talk your way out of it. 
It’s a misunderstanding, you’d say. Let me tell you my side of the story. 
Just your luck that the bounty hunter who finally caught you wouldn’t budge an inch. 
He was stoic, solid. Impenetrable, just like his armor. The very size of his body intimidated you, but it had nothing on what you felt when he stared. The helmet he constantly wore hid everything from you, and even though you couldn’t see his expression, you still tried to plead your case.
It was like arguing with a wall. 
You pressed, and he remained silent. You explained, and he stood eerily still. You begged, and he said nothing.
Eventually, he admitted that the begging did it. 
That, and the fact that he needed a babysitter – for a child just as stubborn as he was. 
Weeks spent watching the Child and waiting around for him had your nerves strung tight, and sleep pulled at your dry eyes. You knew he was just as tired, but he was being infuriatingly stubborn – as usual. 
“Just take the bed,” he urged. 
“You’ve been out there for over two weeks,” you argued back, gesturing outside the ship. “Not a chance. You need sleep.”
“I’ll sleep in the cockpit.”
“Why, when you could stretch out?” you pushed back. 
His sighs were always these weighted things – thick with impatience, paired with hands on his hips and a tip of his helmet. The sound of it made you cringe when he did it to bounties, made you smile when he did it to the kid – but now, it made you frustrated. Annoyed. 
You crossed your arms over your chest, standing firm. He could be stubborn, but so could you. 
“The kid’s been down for ages, Mando. Take advantage of it.”
“And where will you sleep?” he pressed. 
“On the floor. Up in the cockpit. Wherever.” 
“On the floor?” He stared you down, and it took everything you had not to avert your eyes. 
“Hey,” you called him out. “Don’t try to intimidate me. It’s not going to work.”
He remained silent, and you huffed with annoyance. 
“Please,” you sighed. “I’m tired, you’re tired, the kids asleep. You need rest. Just take the bed.”
You turned to climb the ladder to the cockpit, and his voice stopped you. 
“Want to share it?”
Whatever sleep you thought you’d get, you were kidding yourself. 
The hulk of this man was a furnace next to you: the broad span of his shoulders blocking out the hull, the width of his chest shielding you, the bulk of his thighs pressed against your own. Insisting you take the side closest to the wall, you couldn’t even crawl out of the cot to go sleep somewhere else without waking him up – and that was the last thing you wanted to do. 
Okay, maybe not the last. 
The last thing you wanted was for him to wake up because you couldn’t stop squirming. 
Paired with the heat of his body, the ache that gathered at the crux of your thighs made it impossible to sleep. It sprouted at his proximity, blossomed at the reminder of his strength, and grew with each of his deep, steady exhales. It pooled in the cradle of your pelvis, flooding through your hips and down. 
Gingerly, you rolled onto your side – but his hips lined up too much with your ass for you to ignore. You tried your other side, but the crook of his neck called to you. You tried your back, and that’s when he spoke. 
“Is something the matter?”
You startled, unaware that he’d been awake this whole time. That kriffing helmet. 
“Can’t sleep, I guess.”
He hummed, the sound going straight to your core. “Not enough space?”
It really wasn’t, but you found yourself not wanting to admit it. It was either this or the cold, uncomfortable cockpit and being curled up next to him was the better option. 
Even if you ended up going mad with want. 
“No,” you replied. “It’s fine.”
He nodded, going still. 
Your eyes ran up the length of his forearm, over the bulk of his bicep. You pictured his arm lifting to rest itself across the dip of your waist, and imagining the weight of it, you let out a shaky exhale. Closing your eyes, you leaned into the fantasy: his hand sliding underneath the band of your thermals, cupping you wholly between your legs. His fingers sliding inside of you with a stretch, your thighs parting to make room for his thick wrist. Slick pooled along your seam and dripped out, and you shifted again on the cot. 
This time, his hand stilled you. 
“Do you want me to sleep somewhere else?” 
“No,” you blurted out, embarrassed. “No. I’m sorry.”
“Do you want…something else?” 
Your cheeks flooded with warmth, and you turned your head to look at him. “Like what?”
He shrugged, the shadowed round of his shoulder moving in the darkness. “You tell me.”
It didn’t take long after that to be buried underneath the bulk of his body. 
Every inch of skin that you dreamt about for months bared for your touch, you couldn’t stop exploring him – the fragrant crook of his neck, the smooth planes of muscle that covered his back, the trim sides of his torso and his soft belly dusted with hair. He seemed to revel in your touch, and you imagined that to be the case, with how often he was covered head to toe. 
His hips fit neatly within the cradle of your thighs, and when he filled you with a swift, precise push forward, a flutter erupted in your belly at the idea that he might fuck like he hunts – with competence and skill. Your back arched off his cot to take him deeper, and he groaned in your ear. 
“Fuck, you feel good,” he praised, his knees shifting wider for purchase. His hips kissed the inside of your thighs with every roll forward, his weight spreading them wider underneath his strokes, and your hands splayed across his chest when he pushed himself up on his hands to stroke deeper, harder. Scars littered his chest, memories of his past permanently etched into his skin and something about it tugged at you – the idea that he always came out on top, but paid a price to get there.
Wanting to give him the rest you knew he deserved, you tugged him down on top of you and rolled your bodies until you straddled his lap – a sight that made him hum with appreciation. He tried to sit up to join you, but you pushed him back down. 
“I said you need rest, Mando,” you reminded him of your earlier words, your hips rolling in time with every upwards push of his. The filling heft of his cock had your mouth dropping open, and though you couldn’t see his face, you knew his eyes were fixed on it. “Let me – let me do the work.”
“Okay,” he eventually agreed, his thumb finding the bud of your clit. A few swipes of his touch had you keening, and he rested his other arm back behind his head, as if getting comfortable to watch the show. “I’ll watch while you make yourself come this time, sweet girl. But the next one?”
You moaned, your hips rocking faster against his – forwards into the swirling pressure of the pad of his thumb, and backwards onto the filling thickness of his cock. 
“The next one is mine.”
After that first night, he never let you sleep anywhere else. 
The cot much too small for two bodies, you made do by always being joined in one way or another: your limbs entwined, your body draped over his, his cock nestled inside you. Days and sometimes weeks without him at your side, he stripped bare every time he crawled in next to you, loathe to waste any moment without your skin touching his. 
Your face fit into the crook of his neck perfectly, his arm wrapped around your waist just right. For someone that spent so long by himself, it was clear that he was touch starved, but as you found out, so were you. 
Two lonely stars, colliding in a galaxy. 
You got used to his moods and he got used to yours. A routine came easy: you played the mechanic to his pilot, the babysitter to his parent, the vessel for him to pour his love into. And he did, every chance he could get. 
In the cockpit, poured into your mouth. 
In the hull of the ship, splashed along your back. 
In his cot, every single night, in every single way possible – smeared across your chest, pooled on your soft belly, flooded into the depths of your cunt. 
It shouldn’t have been a surprise what happened after that, but it was. 
Seated on the edge of the worn exam table, you swallowed hard against a cough that rose in your chest. It tickled the base of your throat, demanding relief and you tucked your face into the crook of your elbow and let out a wet cough, your lungs heavy and sore. 
You had caught it from a bounty, a filthy vagrant that Mando had hauled up the ramp earlier that month. Due to a few choice words that the bounty spit at you, Mando made sure to freeze him (none too kindly) right away, but not before the stranger coughed with force in the small space. 
Not one to see a doctor for his own ailments, you were surprised when he demanded you see one after a couple weeks of the lingering cold. Leaving him waiting in the lobby, you smiled at the immediate berth the other patients gave him when he sat down. 
You picked at your finger, suppressing the urge to cough again. 
The medical droid reassured you. “You’ll be fine. All life signs for you and the child are reading in good condition.”
“The child?” you asked. The kid wasn’t sick, and he wasn’t even here.
“Looks like it’s just a cough. The baby is fine – all vitals are measuring optimal.”
You froze, unable to reply. 
The baby. 
“The…baby?”
The droid laughed, modulated and carefree like their words didn’t just shatter your whole existence. “A couple months along, I’d say. Do you want to listen?”
Gently lifting your tunic, they pressed a monitor to the curve of your stomach and the pulsing heartbeat that met your ears brought instant tears to your eyes. 
“There, there,” the droid soothed, handing you a tissue. “Sounds healthy!”
You walked back to the ship in a daze, your surroundings a blur, your mind stuck on a loop of worry.
He never asked for this. 
This is no life to raise a child in. 
The ship – the ship barely fits the three of you, where the maker is a baby going to go?
The endless questions ate away at you for the rest of the evening, every worst case scenario coming true in your mind. 
“Are you sure you’re okay?”
On his side facing you, Din (a name he had long ago whispered to you in the darkness of his cot) ran his touch along your arm. He tucked you closer, rubbing your back. “You still feel sick?”
Your cheek rested against the firm heat of his chest, and you listened to his heartbeat – so like the one you heard earlier today. They sounded the same, and tucked safely next to his bulk, you murmured the words into his neck. 
“I’m going to have a baby.”
His visor tilted downwards just as his hand tipped your chin up. He looked down at you, and you wished desperately that you could see his face. Your lip trembled when he said nothing, and he cleared his throat. 
“I…wanted to wait,” he started, and your face crumbled. 
“I’m sorry,” you apologized, cutting him off. Your voice wavered, and you looked away. “I –”
“Stop.” His commanding voice halted your sentence mid-speech. His hold slid from your chin to your cheek, cupping the soft curve. 
“I wanted to wait,” he repeated, softer this time. “Until we could find someone to do the ceremony.”
Your face scrunched in confusion, and he dragged the pad of his thumb across your cheekbone, collecting a stray tear.
“We have a special ceremony we perform, when we bind ourselves to someone for life. It involves…taking our helmet off, so they can see us. So they can know us, better than anyone else.”
Your gaze transfixed on his visor, you held your breath as he reached for the edge of his helmet. 
“You already know me better than anyone else, so…”
He lifted the helmet up, and for the first time, you saw his face. 
He was beautiful – warm, rich brown eyes, ringed with thick lashes. A strong nose, a plush mouth. Stubble that scattered across his cheeks, a moustache that you never would have imagined. His curls were dark and mussed, and you envisioned a baby in your arms with the same color hair. 
The grin that broke across his face was almost as beautiful as the face itself – and every worry you had vanished at the sight of it. 
He cleared his throat, and when he spoke, the sound of his real voice brought fresh tears to your eyes. 
"We are one when together, we are one when parted.” He recited the vows and his hand took yours, placing it on his chest. He let his own touch rest along the curve of your belly. “We will share all, we will raise warriors."
You sobbed, and he laughed – a new, treasured sound that made you cry even harder. 
“You have to repeat it,” he teased. 
Focused on his voice – his real voice, the feeling of hearing it for the first time overwhelming you – you took a deep breath, and stared into his eyes. 
“We are one when together, we are one when parted.” A hitch in your breath broke the vow, and he smiled, his fingers splaying across your skin. “We will share all, we will raise warriors.”
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notherpuppet · 6 months ago
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I KNOW YOU USUALLY DRAWING RADIOAPPLE BUT I JS WANNA SAY I LOVE HOW YOU DRAW ALASTOR AND HUSKS RELATIONSHIP THE TOXIC OLD MAN YAOI IS AMAZING!!!!!11
I’M MULTISHIPPER AF
I know the majority of my fanart is radioapple (I just think of too many antics for them haha) but I like to travel on many ships 🚢
I am limited by my drawing hand and the hours in a day 😭
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ectoplasmer · 2 years ago
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squinting really hard at that egogender label again
#i am so indecisive#like being referred to femininely is okay!! i think#some phrases feel. weird and unfitted though#and sometimes they only feel right in certain contexts#and she/her pronouns still feel fine. i don’t really see myself 100% identifying with any others aside from those#but. i guess it’s specifically the idea of being a girl that has me confused#and maybe it’s because of how i feel now. femininity doesn’t come as naturally as i would want it to#i feel like i don’t fit in with what is defined by society as a ‘girl’#but every time i think that i can only think about how that sounds so inherently misogynistic of me to think lol#like there isn’t any defined label to what being a girl is.#i could still be a girl and still do everything else. i shouldn’t be with held from that just because of how the majority view that#but i guess it’s just. i don’t know. i don’t think it’s all that important to me#i just want people to see me as *me*. i don’t think my gender really plays all that much of a role in how I perceive myself or how i want-#-people to perceive me. i’m just rainy and i think that’s what is important#but again identifying femininely doesn’t feel inherently wrong. its confusing i don’t know how to explain it#i struggle to explain things that aren’t like. solid or have actual things i can recall back to lol#anyway. i have been thinking about the demigirl label too and i think it’d be funny if i started using that#collecting all the demi- labels this year apparently#i keep saying i’ll figure it out but i had this exact conversation with a friend almost a year ago#i don’t know. identity is confusing. i’ll get there eventually though#rainy.file
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whimsyprinx · 2 years ago
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i think I just need to stop clinging to and getting so attached to people
#whimsy whispers#because then things fall apart and so do I#it’s also just like suffocating and annoying of me to do to people I’ve realized#like I just tend to get too attached to people and when things get bad and I can’t fix them I don’t know what to do or how to cope#especially when it feels like no one else is being affected the same way I am so it feels like it’s just a me problem#anyways guess who finally talked to their irl about how they’d been feeling for the past few months#I don’t expect for things to improve based on just doing this and idk if things will be like they use to be but this is the only friendship#that I feel like I can like idk salvage at this point#I don’t think they’ll go back to being the most important person in the world to me or my very best friend but maybe that’s for the best#it just hurts not having someone like that in my life anymore because I did genuinely love them so much but like idk I already knew they’d#never love me as much as i did like they have actual loved ones who it makes more sense to cherish more which is like obvs fine I just like#idk i feel like I generally stopped being important in general to them and that’s what hurt most#as for the other friendships I’m uncertain about there’s nothing I can do there#I talk to like very few people now and have been trying to like allow new people to try and get close to me as scary as that is#I am afraid I’ll just fuck up those relationships too tbh because everything is a cycle with me#idk I just feel stupid and helpless and like there’s nothing I can do and maybe i just need to accept that there isn’t anything I can do to#fix my mistakes like I can’t undo anything and I can’t fix them and like I just hope I’ll accept that eventually#and again I need to just learn to stop getting so attached to people it’s just abdjfktk hard for me not to but each time I hurt others or#others hurt me it makes it harder for me to want to let anyone else get closer and eventually I’m going to be all alone if this keeps up#anyways tnats tofays vent/fun little realization that I need to force myself to accept
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insanechayne · 1 year ago
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~ ~ ~
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paradiseprincesss · 4 months ago
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˗ˋˏ ♡ ˎˊ˗ 𝑻𝒐 𝑩𝒆 𝑬𝒂𝒕𝒆𝒏 𝑨𝒍𝒊𝒗𝒆 | Jonathan Crane
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NOTES -> Hello hello! im gonna be in uni full time again starting first week of september so uploads will be much slowerrrr im sorry. I’ll try to write as much as i can for u my little loves!
REQUEST -> Based off the prompt 15 from this list here
SUMMARY -> Your boss, Jonathan Crane, plans on isolating you away from your old life, consuming you whole until you become nothing but devoted to him...and you're too naive to see the mind games that the expert psychiatrist is playing.
WORD COUNT -> 3.3k
WARNINGS -> Smut, p in v, soft!dark Jonathan, doctor/nurse relationship, boss/employee relationship, creampie
MASTERLIST
MINORS DNI 18+ ONLY.
*ੈ✩‧₊˚
Jonathan felt his chest tighten as he narrowed his blue eyes behind his glasses. His focus was locked on you and only you, along with the orderly speaking to you for the last few minutes.
You were a nurse at Arkham, young and bright-eyed, so full of energy — and that caught Jonathan’s attention. Your unusually cheerful demeanour and sweet aura drew him in, whether he liked it or not. Maybe it was how you’d always give him a cute little wave every time he’d pass by you, or maybe it was how you’d smile at him when everyone else seemed to cower away from the stoic doctor. 
Or maybe it was because once he saw you leaving work in your everyday clothes instead of your usual scrubs, and when you seemingly bent over to pick up your keys which you dropped on the ground, he could see the lace of your pink panties poking out of your low-rise sweatpants — but I guess we’ll never know. 
See, that was the problem. You were so sweet, but you were like that with everyone you worked with; which made Jonathan feel inferior in many ways, but he promised himself that he’d have you eventually.
He didn’t want to hurt you by any means — oh god, no. He’d rather torture himself than watch you suffer through any anguish. However, he did want everyone around you to fall victim to a rather sinister fate if it meant they stayed away from you. 
Jonathan didn’t really consider himself a sadist, but watching those around you seemingly go missing and suddenly quit their jobs at Arkham (unwillingly, of course), derived an innate sense of pleasure within him. 
That was one of the perks of being the chief psychiatrist — he had all the power in the world to do whatever he pleased within the walls of Arkham, no matter who he hurt in the process. Jonathan would quietly fire many employees who he felt were “too friendly” with you, but he’d always tell you that they’d mysteriously quit or that they had changed jobs. 
“Perhaps they just didn’t have it in them to help the…unique patients we house here,” he’d say to you. “Not everyone is as dedicated and as kind as you are, you know?” 
Foolishly, you let his flattery get into your head; you let yourself fall for him without even realizing it.
You believed that the universe divinely guided you to him. You were sure of it — he was just so kind and understanding. You couldn’t believe the other staff of Arkham didn’t see him the way you did! How could they dislike him? Fear him? 
To Jonathan, you were like an angel that fell from above, capturing his cold, dead heart within your warm, beating, and very alive one. You were so kind to the patients, so gentle with them — and your patients only ever had good things to say about you. 
As you spoke to the orderly in front of you about what you did over the weekend, you noticed your boss looking rather tense from the corner of your eye. His jaw was clenched slightly, and his expression unforgiving. He exhaled sharply before ushering you over toward him, causing you to excuse yourself from your current conversation. 
“Doctor Crane,” you greeted sweetly, “how are you?”
“I’m rather stressed today,” he answered softly, taking on that same gentle tone that he always seemed to take with you. 
“Is everything okay?” 
“Everything is fine, but I'm worried about you.”
“What do you mean?” you asked innocently, cocking your head to the side slightly as if to emphasize your confusion. 
“I think perhaps we should speak in my office about this,” he offered. “Come with me, please.” 
Your smile suddenly faltered slightly as anxiety and paranoia ran rampant through your veins.
Your paranoid thoughts had to be put on the back burner as you took a seat across from him in his office, watching him as he sat down at his desk. His suit was pristine as always — and today, he opted for a brown sweater vest underneath it.
You’d count every thread and stitch on his suit for him if he asked you to. 
“Doctor Crane—”
“Just Jonathan is fine,” he interrupted before clearing his throat. “I wanted to speak to you in private about a certain concern of mine.” 
“What is it?”
He sighed before he took off his glasses and meticulously placed them on his desk. He leaned forward slightly, and you stayed quiet as he hesitated for a moment before his smooth voice finally cut through the silence in his office between the two of you. 
“I’m worried that you may be overworking yourself,” he explained, looking at you with his tantalizing eyes. “I notice you pick up shifts and work overtime frequently, and I worry that you may be taking on more than you can handle. As your boss, I just want to make sure that you’re not burning yourself out as that can’t be good for you, and I believe in a healthy work-life balance.”
You made an ‘o’ shape with your mouth, unsure as to what you could say to him — that wasn’t what you were expecting him to say to you. Perhaps you had been overworking yourself, but that was just a part of you. Having a strong work ethic was something you strongly believed in, but maybe he was right. You couldn’t care for your patients if you were too exhausted to, right? 
Now that he mentioned it, you were quite tired today. You started to think about it — as of recently, you’d been slamming coffees left right and center to stay awake at work, hadn’t you? You just wanted to help out since you were fairly new around here, but maybe it was doing you more damage than good.
Jonathan saw your usually cheerful demeanour deflate in his office, and he looked at you sympathetically, “I know this is not something you’d want to hear, especially from your boss of all people — but I just want to ensure that all my staff are doing well, you know?”
You bit your lip for a mere second, hesitating to speak before you let the words fall from your lips, “You know, Jonathan, sometimes I feel like you’re the only person here who actually…cares about me.” 
He internally applauded himself — in a moment of vulnerability, you sought out comfort in him. Just like he had planned. Just like he wanted.
“I think you’re an exceptional nurse,” he mused, “and truthfully, I do enjoy working alongside you. So yes, of course, I care about you. I remember when I first started working after finishing my residency, I would exhaust myself constantly. I’ve learned through many years that it’s just not good for you.” 
Jonathan’s plan was being executed perfectly — he wanted to isolate you. He wanted you to come running into his arms, far away from everyone else around you. He was on his worst behaviour today, but he believed you brought out the best in him. 
You weren’t overworking yourself, but with Jonathan’s quick wit, years of training in psychology, and exceptional gaslighting skills, you thought perhaps he was right. Maybe you should take some time off of work, you thought.
“Tell you what,” he said softly, “how about you and I have drinks tonight instead? Forget about work and such. I think you need it.”
His words caused your cheeks to heat up. He was your boss, and this was way out of line for a boss to ask an employee. However, it didn’t help that you were very attracted to him.
“Drinks?”
“My place at eight. I have a bottle of cabernet I think you’d enjoy — If I remember correctly, you said it was your favourite?” 
“Y-yeah,” you stammered. “It is.” 
“So I'll see you tonight at eight, then,” he smiled softly, causing butterflies to erupt in your stomach. “I’ll text you my address.” 
You nodded, slightly starstruck. 
*ੈ✩‧₊˚
Once you’d parked your car on the side of the neighbourhood street, you stepped out into the chilly night, your high heels clicking against the pavement of the ground loudly as you made your way onto his porch.
You gave three soft raps to his front door before you heard shuffling coming from inside the house. After a few moments, the front door swung open gently, and Jonathan stood there with a small smile on his face.
“Come inside,” he ushered you, “make yourself at home, darling.”
And so you did. 
You two talked over a few glasses of cabernet, bringing up the topic of work a few times here and there, but he mostly attempted to get to know the real you. What you did in your spare time, what your hobbies were, if you were seeing anyone…
“Out of curiosity, are you seeing anyone?” Jonathan asked you casually, but his voice dropped an octave as he looked directly at you, resting his hand on your thigh rather boldly. “I’m asking because I've seen the way you look at me…” 
“I-I’m sorry?” you stammered, your cheeks feeling warmer and warmer by the second with the way his hand was now resting on your leg. You couldn’t deny it now. “I didn’t mean…um, I just — you’re always so kind to me…and I–”
He shushed you softly, creeping his hand up a little further. “I’m quite flattered, darling. Not to worry,” he purred. “I figured it wouldn’t be very appropriate of me to tell you how hard it is for me to not look at you when you’re at work, but after today, I just don’t think I can help myself anymore…” 
Suddenly, his lips brushed up against yours, and as if it was instinct, your hands came to wrap around his shoulders. He let you pull him in even closer, his hands now coming to rest on your hips as you two kissed feverishly on his couch.
You and him were like a chemical reaction — explosive, unpredictable, and potentially fatal.
“You’re perfect,” he whispered against your lips in between kisses. 
A shiver ran down your spine as his hold on your hips tightened slightly, his words causing your brain to short-circuit for a moment before you could think clearly again. 
“Jonathan, I–”
“Don’t speak, just give into it, my darling.”
You let yourself get lost in the constellation that was Jonathan Crane, letting him run his hands all over your body and kiss you with an insatiable hunger. Soft moans left your mouth as he peppered kisses down your jawline and neck, nipping at the delicate skin gently. 
You would’ve been worried about him leaving marks because you wouldn’t want your boss to see the next day at work — but you had to remind yourself that he was your boss. 
But none of that mattered when it felt so right; when his lips felt so good against your skin.
“Can I take this off?” he rasped, toying with the strap of your dress. 
“Mhm,” you hummed. “Please, Jonathan…”
Slowly, he took the dress off of your body, gently tossing the garment to the side as he looked at you in absolute awe. It was like looking at a priceless piece of art in a museum exhibit to him — nothing could compare. Even a picture wouldn’t do the sight in front of him justice. 
“Should we go upstairs?” you suddenly asked. 
Maybe it was the handful of wine you’d shared that evening, or maybe it was just sheer arousal; you weren’t sure which one, but all you knew was that you needed him to have his way with you. 
“Yeah, of course,” he agreed, taking your hand in his. “Just up the stairs to the left — I think I'll let you lead the way, darling…”
The two of you got up from the couch, hand in hand, and Jonathan’s eyes roamed your body from behind as you made your way up the stairs together. 
Of course, you came prepared — you know, just in case things were to happen. Before you left, you threw on your sexiest, laciest, lingerie underneath your dress, and it was a good thing you did because that investment certainly paid off.
He watched your hips sway in your lingerie, along with the heels you were still wearing (because we simply can’t forget about those), and he could feel his cock straining against his pants. “Pretty girl,” he mumbled from behind you. “Your body is heavenly.” 
“Shush,” you giggled, grabbing him by his tie and pulling him close once you reached the bedroom. 
He looked down at you in the dim lighting of his bedroom, noticing the way your skin was glowing under it. Your hair was slightly messy from making out on the couch earlier, and you had a small smile tugging at your lips — you were perfection if he’d ever seen it. 
Jonathan kissed you rougher this time, his hands finding their way into your hair, tugging ever so gently against your scalp. He backed you up onto the bed, pushing you down onto it as he undid his tie, looming over your delicate body which was sprawled out on his king-sized bed. 
After taking his tie off, he threw off his suit jacket and started to unbutton his shirt. You hummed softly, running your heel against his leg as he rushed to get himself out of his clothes. The tent in his pants made it all the more obvious how desperate he truly was for you, but you stayed patient. 
Once he was on the bed with you, he helped you out of your bra and panties, causing your cheeks to heat up from how exposed you felt. “You’re cute when you blush,” he commented when he noticed your blush, making you all the more flustered while he undid his belt. 
After freeing himself, his thick, veiny cock caught your attention, and you swallowed the lump in your throat. He was big — you weren’t sure how that was supposed to fit, but right now you were so wet, you were almost certain your walls would stretch out around him with ease. 
He lined himself up with your dripping entrance, giving himself a few strokes before looking at you with his lip caught between his teeth. “Are you sure?” he whispered, and you nodded feverishly. 
“Please,” you whimpered.
Your back was arched and you let out a filthy moan as he slid himself into your warm, sticky cunt with little resistance. The sheer size of him alone had you feeling so full, and he stilled as he bottomed out in you so that you could adjust to him. “Tell me when,” he said softly, his hand coming to brush up against your hips softly. 
“You can move now,” you breathlessly said, giving him the green light. Your breath got caught in your throat as he started to set a gentle but deep pace, the tip of his cock brushing against that spongy spot inside of you with every thrust. 
“O-oh–” you moaned.
His hands found purchase on your hips, and his eyes trailed over your face as he fucked you sensually, but slowly, eventually going harder and faster as you got accumulated to him. “So fucking tight, Jesus—” he choked out. You’d never heard him curse before, and his smooth voice had you clenching around him, to which he let out another moan. “Fuck, darling — you feel so good.” 
“Mm-hmm!” you squeaked, taking his cock deeper and deeper into your soaked cunt with every stroke. “Jonathan, fuck—!”
“Right there, darling?” he cooed softly, slamming his cock into your hole much rougher now, causing you to see stars as he stretched you open on his thickness. “Feels good, baby?” 
“Yes, yes, yes — oh my god!” you chanted, grabbing onto his biceps as you felt his fat cock drilling you. You were letting out feverish moans, your eyes rolling into the back of your head as you became increasingly more cock-drunk by the minute. 
Your moans were like music to Jonathan. Like the sound he would hear being played once he died and went to heaven — because to him, this was heaven. You’d come running into the arms of the man who was slowly isolating you, breaking you; cornering you into his heart. 
But there’s always something so right about something so inherently wrong, isn’t there? 
“I can feel you squeezing me,” he groaned, watching you with furrowed brows as he concentrated on your pleasure. “Are you close, darling? Fuck, you are, aren’t you?”
“Yes,” you whimpered breathlessly, moans being forced out of you with every delicious thrust he gave your cunt. “Gonna– oh, I’m gonna cum!” 
Jonathan watched in a mixture of pure bliss, awe, and satisfaction as you fell apart in his very hands. Yes — this is where he wanted you. He just wanted to love you, to show you how perfect he was for you, to take care of you and make you see that everyone else around you was just a waste of time. 
No more talking to orderlies who’d flirt with you, no more going out for after-work drinks with the other nurses. No, none of that. He was going to make sure that you’d work under him only, figuratively and literally.
“Gon’ cum,” he groaned, feeling his cock spurting ropes of cum into your warm, tight hole as he gave you a few more lazy thrusts, not bothering to pull out. Your mind went blank as he filled you up wholly, stuffing you with his sticky, warm seed as you lay there fucked out from what just happened moments prior. “Why don’t you stay over tonight?”
You looked up at him groggily, mind still foggy from your orgasm. “What? I work tomorrow–”
“Take a paid day off,” he shrugged, pulling his softening cock out from your worn-out hole. “Use as many as you’d like darling, I won’t tell.” 
His teasing words caused you to throw your head back into the pillows blissfully with a sigh, genuinely believing that he only had your best interest at heart — he just didn’t want you to overwork yourself. It’s not like he was planning on totally locking you away from every living being in Gotham besides him or anything…
“I feel bad though,” you murmured sleepily. “I feel like I’m – I dunno – abusing my privileges.” 
“Don’t be ridiculous, pretty girl,” Jonathan assured you softly, turning off the lights so that only the moonlight was dimly shining into his bedroom. He placed a soft kiss on the top of your head as he pulled the covers over you both, cradling you in his arms like you were made of fine china. “You know I only want what’s best for you.”
“You’re so lovely, Jon. You truly have such a kind soul.” 
“Surely nothing compared to yours, my darling,” he whispered against your hair as you closed your eyes. “Now, get some rest. We can talk about moving your things in here in the morning…”
Unfortunately, you had already dozed off in his embrace; too busy being washed away by sleep to hear his words. Jonathan smiled to himself — he’d never let you go now. You’d lost all control the moment you stepped into his house, unknowingly making yourself a hostage of some sort.  
In the end, as you clung to him, believing he was the saviour from your exhaustion, you failed to see that it was his “love” that had slowly consumed you whole, leaving you nothing but a hollow shell, devoured by the very hands that promised refuge.
Sometimes, the most dangerous traps are the ones we walk into willingly, thinking they’re the key to our freedom, as they say. But the cruel irony of it all is that we think we’re being saved from the jaws of this terrible world, only to be eaten alive by those who we call our saviours. 
*ੈ✩‧₊˚
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@fauxcongenialite @ceruleanrainblues @o0laura @fiona-my-love @cranecat
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rodolfoparras · 4 months ago
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Four in the morning ( when you creep back into bed )
Pairing: Wolverine x Top Male Reader
Cw: 18+, fingering, anal sex, sub!wolverine, dom!male reader, fwb,
Thinking about Wolverine who’s always so impatient to wind down after a long day, calls you over to his place with someone else’s blood and guts still caked onto him.
He hasn’t even finished up the call when he’s stripping the clothes off of him, before pushing strong thighs up to his chest, spit slicked fingers working on loosening the tight ring of muscles, all while counting down how long it takes for you to get there, silently wondering if he should have someone else finish up the job instead.
By the time you arrive, he’s already driving three fingers up inside his tight wet hole, the muscles in his wrist flexing with how hard he’s going, angry red cock uselessly slapping against his stomach as he fucks himself down onto his fingers , all while frustrated noises roll off of his tongue because of course this isn’t enough to make him finish
The frustration only grows when he sees you standing motionless at the door, and he’s quick to tell you to hurry over and fuck him already, even huffing and puffing as he proceeds to turn over and present his ass for you because fuck does he have to do everything around here?
“come on come on come on” he rushes out, hand parting his cheeks to show you his hungry cunt, momentarily wondering if he should just tie you up and use you however he wants.
But just as the thought strikes his head he feels your cock brushing up against the furls of muscles, and a sigh of relief escaping his lips as you finally slide inside him.
Despite the amount of prep there’s a slight burn that comes with the stretch, muscles reflexively resistant as you sink further into him, but he happily welcomes it; toes curling, clawed nails threatening to poke hole in the sheets, as the pleasurable flames slowly but surely engulf him “mfp - ah fuck that’s it yes yes yes, took you ah took you long enough,”
He steadily takes you inch by inch till you’re buried to the hilt; ass flushed with your hips, pressed so close he can practically feel your heartbeat against his skin, even feels himself going lax in as if you’ve finally quenched the fire that’s burning inside of him.
“Couldn’t exactly teleport here now could I?”
Just as he’s about to retort with something sarcastic, you give an experimental roll of your hips cock head brushing up against the wall of nerves that knocks the wind out of him , desperately gasping for air when he demands “Fuck!, oh -oh need more come on, please!!”
“Easy there , going ah- to hurt yourself,” you splurt out , fingers digging into his hips as if to prevent yourself from ramming into the man.
Logan however couldn’t care less, uses his hips to push himself back down onto your length, body shuddering and groans escaping his lips as he starts fucking himself on your dick. “I’ll - ah - I’ll heal,”
That’s when he feels your fingers yank at his hair, pulling him back til his head is resting on your shoulder before driving up into him at a relentless pace, all while keeping a sturdy hand on his hip, turning and twisting his body as you please- as if he weighed nothing .
“This what you wanted huh?” You breathe into his ear while continuously slamming into his hungry cunt.
For a moment he’s unable to muster up a response, lost in the way you’re slamming your hips into him so hard it almost hurts, stretching his body in ways that makes him feel like he’s being split in half on your cock.
But the constant jabs to his prostate eventually coaxes the words right out of him “Yes! Yes! Yes! don’t stop fuck!” He gasps out feels himself already inching closer to his orgasm, and maybe he’d be embarrassed about it if he hadn’t been worked up for such a long time. All he can do now is keep a vice like grip on your cock fearing you’d be cruel enough to pull out when he’s so close to cumming
Fortunately for him you don’t do any of that, instead you continue ramming straight into him til the tension in his balls grow unbearable tight and he’s withering in your arms.
“Cum-cumming-“ is all he manages to blurt out, body tensing for a moment before spurting ropes of cum all over the mattress. “Mph fuck!” He cries out, , world blurring, ears ringing as he continues rides out his high in your arms.
Eventually he stops shaking in your embrace and upon catching his breath he’s hit with the smell of a coppery scent, one heavy eyelid prying open just to be met with the sight of his claws digging into your now bloody hands. A wave of panic rushes through him, and he’s quick to retract his claws before he goes to say something. But just as he’s about to speak you interrupt him “it’s okay”
He doesn’t say a word as he brings your hands to his lips, tongue slipping out and lapping up the bloody mess on your skin.
“Jesus Christ Logan,” you wince out, head dropping into the nook of his neck as he cleans you up, swears he can feel your cock twitching inside as he continues on with his task , his lips all bloody and smiling ear to ear when he says the words “Another round?”
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munsonsmixtapes · 8 months ago
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Do Me a Favor?
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Find part two here!
Eddie x fem!shy!bestie!reader
Summary: you buy some weed from your best friend Eddie and after shotgunning from him, you both find yourselves wanting more
word count: 6k
cw: MDNI 18+, smut, oral (f receiving)
The cold air nipped at your skin as you knocked on the trailer door. You tightened your cardigan around you as waited for someone to answer, wondering what the hell you had been doing there. You didn’t smoke weed. You didn’t buy it either, but maybe you just wanted to see the cute metalhead who was supposedly the best dealer in town, even though he was one of your closest friends and let you come over whenever you wanted.
You had been friends with Eddie Munson since that one time he helped you pick the books that you had dropped when someone had bumped into you in the hallway in the tenth grade. He had grabbed your copy of Lord of the Rings and the two of you yapped about it all the way to the cafeteria where he let you sit with his group.
After letting you sit with him every day, he eventually asked you to join Hellfire Club and you happily agreed. Not long after, the two of you found yourselves hanging out outside of the club, occasionally getting dinner or watching a movie at your house.
Over time, you started to develop romantic feelings because how could you not have? Eddie was just so sweet and caring and he looked out for you like no one else did. And maybe it was silly to crush on your best friend, but you couldn’t help it. Aside from his charming personality, he also happened to be very easy on the eyes.
The door opened, pulling you out of your thoughts and there Eddie was on the other side, looking like something out of your dreams in his cropped band t-shirt and sweatpants that he had rolled down a few times, giving you a great view of the patch of hair that was right under his belly button.
“Y/n?” He asked, his eyebrows furrowing in confusion. He hadn’t been expecting you, but couldn’t help but feel intrigued to know why you were there.
“Hi, Eddie,” you nodded at him, not quite able to look him in the eye. You had hyped yourself up on the way there, but now that he was actually standing in front of you, you were feeling shy.
“What are you doing here?” He scratched the back of his head, causing his shirt to ride up even more and your mind suddenly went blank. “Thought you had to work.”
“I just got off and I um-I was wondering if I could buy some weed from you.” Eddie laughed at that. He always saw you as an innocent little thing who did everything she was supposed to. A goody-two-shoes that never broke the rules.
“Well,” he let out a chuckle. “I never thought I’d see the day.” Though, he kind of liked the idea of selling weed to you. Not only was it a funny thought, imagining you actually smoking the stuff, but it seemed like you were on edge every time he saw you and he thought you could use something to calm you down.
“We’re not in high school anymore. I’ve changed.” There was a little truth to your statement, but not much. The only thing that had changed about you since high school was that maybe you had a little more confidence and that you had finally gotten your braces off. Other than that, you were pretty much the same.
“So you have,” he nodded. “Well, why don’t you come inside and I’ll show you what I’ve got?” He held the door open for you as you stepped inside, letting it slam behind you. You looked around the place, loving how cozy it felt, especially since you were no longer in the cold weather. You rubbed your hands up and down your arms as you stepped further inside, trying to bring some more warmth to your body. You should have known that it was going to be a bad idea riding your bike across town without a jacket, but the damage was already done.
“The stuff’s in my room if you want to follow me.” Eddie couldn’t help but notice how quiet you were, but he had to admit that he thought it was cute. He knew that that was just who you were, but he couldn’t help but feel like he was making you feel nervous. He didn’t want you to feel pressured into taking the weed if you really didn’t want it. He didn’t know why he cared so much, it was just a normal sale.
Except it wasn’t. You were his best friend and had no experience with drugs whatsoever. He wanted to know why you had a sudden interest, but didn’t feel like it was his business to ask, no matter how close the two of you were.
Eddie had always thought you were pretty, but also thought that you were out of his league. He was the town freak and you were the shy girl who always had her nose in a book. He didn’t think that the two of you were exactly a great match. He didn’t want anyone starting rumors about you too, so he let you slip through his fingers. He decided that he was already risking enough by being friends with you.
But now there you were, standing in the doorway of his room, somehow having gotten prettier since he had seen you a few days ago. You were avoiding his eye contact, staring at the desk that was behind him. You were eyeing the stack of books that were sitting on top of it, wondering what they were, noticing that they were different than the ones that had been there before.
You slowly stepped further into the room, making a beeline for the stack, noticing that they were all new books. You slowly looked at all the covers, most of them being ones you had never heard of, but you were interested in every single one as soon as you read the back. Your face lit up at the book that was on the very bottom. It was your current favorite fantasy novel that you had read more times than you had cared to admit, but you had lost your copy and hadn’t been able to get a new one. You opened the book and let out a gasp at the little signature on the first page, wondering if he had bought it like that or if there was a signing that you didn’t know about.
Eddie watched you, still finding the way that you mumbled to words that were printed on the books to yourself adorable. For a second, he had completely forgotten why you were there. For a second, he had been convinced that you were there to hang out with him like usual.
“I can’t believe you have a signed copy of this.” You turned to face him, showing him the signature. He just let out a chuckle at that, finding you even more adorable. He didn’t think he had ever seen you so animated in the years that he had known you. “How did I not know this?”
“Oh, yeah, I got it a couple weeks ago,” he shrugged. “I honestly forgot that I had it.” The thing had been sitting on his desk since after the signing and he really had forgotten about it, his obsession with it being completely abandoned for another. “You can…keep it if you want.” Your eyes lit up at his suggestion but you quickly slumped your shoulders.
“Oh, no, I couldn’t take it from you.” You set the book back on the desk, knowing that you would have felt bad taking something like that from him. Even though it looked like it hadn’t been touched in a while, you could tell that it meant something to him.
“No,” he shook his head, moving towards you. He took the book and shoved it into your hands, his touching yours as he did so. “Take it, l/n. Please. It’s just been collecting dust here and a thing like that deserves to go to a good home.”
“Are you sure?” His eyes bored into yours to show you how serious he was and you couldn’t help but stare into them. They were hypnotizing, so brown and pretty. You had always been a sucker for brown eyes, especially Eddie’s. You knew that you’d do anything he asked just by looking into them, and you were sure that if he knew that fact, he would have gotten you into trouble.
“I’ve never been more sure of anything in my life.” His hands were still on yours and you were so aware of his touch, loving how soft but rough his skin was. You could feel the cold metal that was his rings against your fingers that was mixed with the warmness of his hands. You just wanted to take them into your own, interlacing your fingers with his.
Eddie took the book from your hands and removed one of the straps of your tote bag from your shoulder and let the book fall inside before putting the strap right back. A smirk kicked up at the corner of his lips and you stared at them, thinking about how kissable they looked. They were so pink and plump and you just wanted to know what they felt like slotted between yours.
“Just so you don’t think about leaving it here,” he winked then turned on his heel to head to his bedside table. He pulled out a tin lunchbox from the bottom shelf and set it on the bed before opening it. He rifled through it, pulling out multiple plastic bags, trying to remember if he even had anything for a beginner. Most of the stuff he had was for people with a much higher tolerance and he didn’t want to start you on something you couldn’t handle.
Eddie found just what he was looking for at the bottom of the lunchbox and held it up to the light just to make sure, then nodded. He then closed the lunchbox and put it back where he found it and sat down on the edge of his bed, patting the spot next to him. You hesitantly sat down next to him, so close to the other end that if you sat any farther away from him, you’d fall to the floor.
Your heart was racing in your chest. You weren’t even going to smoke the stuff, you just wanted to be able to say that you bought some. Once you got home, you had every intention of throwing it into a drawer, never to be touched again. You just were afraid of what it would do to you so you definitely weren’t going to smoke it alone. That was just too scary. Maybe if you had more confidence, you could have asked him to smoke it with you.
“How much?” You asked, reaching for the money you had in your pocket and Eddie just shook his head.
“No need, l/n,” he rested his hand on top of yours to stop you. “First one’s always free,” he winked and your cheeks flushed.
“Could you do me a favor?” You asked, not even thinking about the words that were coming out of your mouth. Eddie titled his head to the side, wondering what you could have possibly wanted him to do for you.
“Anything,” he nodded quickly, ready to do whatever you asked, no matter how weird or ridiculous. “You know that.”
“Would you…want to smoke with me?” That was the last thing he was expecting to ask. He didn’t think that you ever want to get high with him.
“Yeah, sure,” he shrugged, trying to seem nonchalant about the whole thing. He hoped you couldn’t hear how hard his heart was beating his chest as he suddenly felt nervous about the whole thing. “You really want to?” He just wanted to be sure before he started anything.
“Please.” The words came out more desperate than you had intended, but you didn’t even care. You were just happy that he said the words you had been afraid to. Now you didn’t have to worry. He'd be right there to help you if something went wrong and you were sure that he wouldn’t judge if you did something that wasn’t right.
“Alright, well, I’m just gonna roll this up, okay?” He jerked his thumb over his shoulder at his desk as he held up the baggie with his other hand. You felt a weight lift off your shoulders as Eddie gave you a reassuring smile, standing from his bed.
You just nodded in response and he pulled his chair out, sitting at his desk, getting to work. You stayed on the bed, not wanting to get into his space, just letting him do whatever he needed to. You sat patiently, trying not to think too much about what you were doing or you were going to back out. You only got one chance to smoke with your crush and you were going to take it.
Once Eddie had the joint all rolled up, he turned in his chair to face you then made his way back to the bed, sitting down on it hesitantly. Your comfort was his top priority and he was fully prepared to stop everything if you didn’t want to continue.He turned to face you, giving you his full attention. He had never smoked with a first-timer, but he still knew exactly what to do. He wanted to give you options, letting you have full control of the situation.
“So, we can either take turns or we can shotgun, which is where I inhale the smoke and blow it into your mouth. Whatever you want to do is fine with me.” He was being so sweet and gentle and it was getting really difficult for you to not fall for him even harder. You weighed your options and decided that shotgunning was probably the best idea. That way, there was less of a chance that you’d choke and maybe you just wanted to be close to Eddie.
“Can we…shotgun?” You words came out unsure and Eddie’s eyebrows furrowed, wanting to make sure that was actually what you wanted. You nodded enthusiastically, scooting closer to him again. “That’s what I want to do.”
“Then let’s do it.” Eddie turned to grab his lighter from his bedside table and smiled to himself since he had secretly wanted you to pick shotgun. He wanted to be able to touch you, to feel your lips on his, the whole idea making him a little hard. Once he had the lighter, he put the joint between his fingers before holding the lighter out to you. “Wanna do the honors, cutie?”
“Sure,” you nodded and took the lighter from him. You sparked the lighter up and cupped your hand around the joint like you had seen in movies and let it catch the flame before pulling away. You kept hold of the lighter as Eddie beckoned you forward with his free hand.
“C’mere,” he said and you obeyed, moving so you were sitting crisscrossed in front of him. He mimicked your actions and you both got so close that your legs were touching. “Make sure the smoke is in your mouth before inhaling, okay? Don’t want you choking.” You just nodded and Eddie took a drag and held the smoke in his mouth as you leaned forward even more. Your lips parted and Eddie reached up to your face slowly, giving you a look as if asking for permission.
“Do what you need to do,” you told him and his fingers took hold of your chin. His thumb reached up to your bottom lip and he pulled it down as if asking you to open your mouth wider. After it was wide enough, his hand moved to your cheek, pulling your face to his. He gingerly opened up, pressing his lips to your before pushing the smoke into your mouth. You did as he instructed and waited until all of the smoke was in your mouth before you took a deep breath.
Eddie leaned away so you could exhale, gauging your reaction to make sure that you were okay. Just from your first hit, you had been doing a lot better than other first-timers he had seen. Sure, you had only done well because he had told you what to do, but he still thought that you were a natural.
“I don’t feel anything.” Your eyebrows furrowed in confusion as you still felt very sober and Eddie just laughed in response.
“You’re not going to feel anything right away, hon.” His hand moved to your shoulder, giving it a squeeze. “Do you want another hit?”
“Yes,” you nodded and Eddie took another puff and held the joint away from the both of you as he grabbed hold of your waist, pressing his open mouth to yours once again. He blew the smoke into your mouth and you inhaled before you were supposed to, pulling away to cough into your arm. You had been so focused on the way Eddie’s lips felt against yours that you had completely forgotten what you were supposed to do.
“You okay?” He asked, his hand moving to your back, giving it a sympathetic rub. You just held your thumb up as an indication as you continued to cough. “C’mon, let’s go get some water.”
He stubbed the joint out onto his desk then took you by the hand, pulling you from the bed. You continued to cough all the way to the kitchen and couldn’t believe that you had ruined the good time you were having because you had gotten distracted.
Eddie quickly grabbed a glass from one of the cabinets and filled it up with water from the tap before handing it to you. You quickly gulped down as much of the beverage as you could and let out a sigh of relief as you set the empty glass down on the counter.
“You okay? You good?” He asked, the words rushing out of his mouth. He stood in front of you, his hands resting on your back, rubbing up and down in a comforting manner. You leaned into him, your forehead pressing against his chin.
Eddie didn’t know why he felt the need to comfort you and why it had become second nature to him when he was never good at or liked it, he didn’t know. Anytime he was around first-timers who inhaled improperly, someone else always stepped in to help while he watched from the sidelines. But now, there he was, fully prepared to give you whatever you needed.
“I’m good,” you assured him, your arms wrapping around his waist. “Can you just…hold me for a second?”
“I can hold you for all the seconds, honey.” You weren’t sure where the little nickname came from, but you were eating it up, wanting him to say it anytime he referred to you.
You pulled back to look at him and your eyes immediately shifted to his lips. You watched him wet them with his tongue, the wet sheen making them look even more inviting. It was like he was doing it on purpose, trying to torture you by dangling it in your face, knowing that you wouldn’t do anything about it.
Before you could stop yourself, you pressed your lips to his in a lingering peck before quickly pulling away. An embarrassed flush made its way upon your face and you covered your lips with the pads of your fingertips.
“I’m sorry,” you apologized. “I shouldn’t have done that.”
You turned to leave and Eddie didn’t let you get far. He grabbed hold of your wrist and turned you around to face him. He took no time to cradle your face in your hands and capture your top lip between his two. Your hands found his waist and you pulled him to you so he was flush with your body. The kiss was slow and sweet, as if the two of you had all the time in the world. It was everything you had ever hoped, everything you could have ever imagined.
“Don’t ever apologize for that,” he insisted against your lips. “You have absolutely no idea how long I’ve wanted this.” That made you stop in your tracks. You quickly pulled away to look at him, your eyes widening.
“How long?” You were desperate to know exactly how long he had felt that way about you so you could see how much your crushes had overlapped each other.
“Since high school. Almost kissed you that night when I drove you home from Hellfire and I’ve been kicking myself ever since because I didn’t.”
You had remembered that night so vividly. You had ridden your bike, but Eddie had insisted on giving you a ride home. The two of you had talked the entire time about everything and nothing, occasionally giggling at little jokes that you had shared with each other. Even after Eddie had pulled into your driveway, you still sat there, neither of you wanting you to leave. You had noticed him leaning towards you, but you didn’t want to make any assumptions, so you just said your goodbyes and you just felt embarrassed for thinking that he was going to kiss you when it had been clear that he hadn’t.
All that time, you could have sworn that he was going to kiss you and you had been right. You actually hadn’t been delusional for once. For once, the guy that you had feelings for actually reciprocated them and you couldn’t have been more elated.
“Well, now you can make up for lost time.” Your hands rested against his back.
“Don’t mind if I do.” Eddie pulled you back in for another kiss, this one more rough and messy, the two of you so desperate for the other, taking exactly what you wanted from each other.
Eddie’s hands moved to your cardigan and he undid the first button so slowly, giving you a chance to back out if you wanted to. Once he got the okay to continue, he undid the rest and pushed it off of your shoulders. You removed it from your arms and let it fall to the floor.
You let your hands trail up his back and you pulled onto the bottom of his shirt before pulling it over his head. Once it was removed, he threw it to the side, grabbing hold of your waist again. His hands slipped to the strip of skin between the top of your jeans and the bottom of your tank top that had ridden up as he backed you up to the counter, your back hitting it.
He helped you get up on top of it and you spread your legs, Eddie stepping between them. His mouth was quickly on yours again as he licked into it, his tongue roaming around it as if he was trying to taste every single bit of it.
You let out a moan as his tongue swirled around yours and your legs wrapped around his waist, pulling him as close to you as possible. His hands traveled up your shirt and moved to your bra, his fingers resting on the clasp as if asking to take it off.
“Take it off,” you commanded. “Please.” The word came out like a whine and Eddie was happy to oblige, quickly unhooking the clasping before removing the straps from your arms and sliding the whole thing down and pulling it from your tank top. He tossed it behind him then looked at you, searching your face for any sign of hesitance.
“Are you sure you want to keep going?” He licked his lips, his chest rising and falling from being out of breath from your lips being attached. He would have never forgiven himself if he had done something you weren’t comfortable with. He just wanted to be one hundred percent sure.
“I’ve never been more sure of anything in my life, Eds.” Your hand moved up to his cheek, stroking it with your thumb. “I’ve been thinking about this a lot and I want you to be my first.”
“Your first?” His eyes widened. He honestly had no idea that you were a virgin. “Y/n, are you sure you want it to be me?” Eddie wanted to be sure that it was actually what you wanted. That you were doing it with someone you cared about and he wasn’t sure he deserved to be your first.
“Very sure,” you nodded. “You’re the only one I trust to do it.” He felt his cheeks blush at your words, knowing that they meant that you had thought about having sex with him and his dick was getting harder by the second.
“Y/n, you have no idea how honored I am that you want it to be me, but I just want to be sure that you really want this.” Eddie thought it was the greatest honor of all that he was the one that you wanted to lose your virginity to and considered himself the luckiest man alive because of it.
“I’m sure,” you nodded. “I’ve thought about this a lot.”
“Oh, have you?” He teased and pressed another kiss to your lips. “Wanna move this to the bedroom?”
“I’d want nothing more.” Eddie’s lips slotted between yours once again and his hands moved out from under your shirt and wrapped around your waist, pulling you from the counter. Your ankles locked at his back and he carried you to his room, your lips still in the middle of a messy kiss.
He entered his room and slammed the door behind him with his foot, hurrying the two of you to his bed. He collapsed onto it and you fell on top of him. He then sat up and looked at you with a serious look in his eyes.
“I just want to let you know a few things before we get started,” he said, his hands resting on your thighs.
“Okay,” you nodded, ready to listen to whatever he needed to say.
“First, if I go too far or you don’t like something or even if you don’t want to continue, don’t be afraid to let me know. This is all about you, okay?” You just nodded in response and Eddie licked his lips before he continued.
“And on the opposite end, don’t be afraid to let me know what you do like. If you like something, feel free to make noise, and you don’t have to be embarrassed about being too loud. There’s no such thing.”
“Got it,” you nodded, looking him in the eyes so he knew that you completely understood what he was saying. You were desperate to get on with it already, but felt like you owed it to him to listen to what he was saying since it seemed pretty important.
“Do you want to start or should I?”
“You do it.” You wanted him to take the lead since he knew exactly what he was doing.
“Okay,” he replied, leaning towards you, his face only inches from yours. “Just gonna kiss you for now, okay?”
“Mhm,” you nodded and his lips attached to yours again. You felt a little more confident and you were the one to stick your tongue into his mouth, mimicking what he had done earlier, slowly laying him down onto the bed, removing your shirt as you did so. You then leaned down and pulled him into a kiss, your bare chest against his. Eddie brought his hands up and grabbed hold of your tits, the pads of his thumbs massaging your nipples, just enough to make them hard and you made a noise that he knew that he was going to grow very fond of.
Eddie pulled away from you, his mouth immediately moving to your tit. He moved his tongue back and forth, licking across your nipple and you moaned. The whole thing was so foreign to you but you liked the feeling.
Just as you were getting used to it, he took your nipple between his teeth and gave it a pull, causing your hands to move to his hair, giving it a yank. Eddie took that as an invitation to continue and moved to the other nipple, giving it the same attention. You gave it his hair another yank and let out one more moan, trying your best to not be self conscious about how loud you were.
“That’s it, honey,” he said, licking another stripe along your nipple. “Let it out.” Eddie pressed his lips to the spot between your breasts then flipped you over so that your back was against the mattress. He pressed open mouthed kisses all the way down to your stomach and stopped when he got to the top of your jeans.
“These look great on you,” he complimented. “But I’d think they’d look better on the floor. Can I remove them?”
“Yes, please.” He took no time to unbutton them and pulled down the zipper before pulling them down your legs and tossing them to the side. He pressed a kiss to the spot above your underwear then looked up at you for permission to remove them.
“Take them off, Eds. Please. I need you.” Your words came out so whiny and Eddie felt himself getting even more hard.
“Yes ma’am,” he responded before taking your underwear off. He was about to throw them on the floor, but you stopped him, putting your hands over his.
“You should keep them,” you told him. “To remember this night.”
“Isn't that objectification?” He liked the idea of keeping your underwear, but also kind of felt like he was treating you like an object by doing that.
“Not if I say it isn’t. Put them in your pocket.” Without a second thought, Eddie put the underwear into his back pocket before resting his hand on your knees, pulling you in for a bruising kiss. He then spread your legs open to get a peek at your pussy which was sopping wet.
“Wow,” he said, noticing that there was already a stain from where everything had leaked out onto his bedding. “This might be the wettest pussy I’ve ever seen. Mind if I get a taste?”
“I wouldn’t mind at all.” Eddie climbed off of the bed as he pulled you to the end of it. He then got onto his knees before throwing your legs over his shoulders. He looked up at you one more time for any signs of hesitance and when he saw how eager you looked, he slowly pushed his head between your thighs, burying his face into your cunt.
You let out a gasp as his nose brushed it and gripped the blanket as he licked a stripe from your slit to your clit. He swirled his tongue around the area and you couldn’t keep your sounds to yourself anymore.
“Oh, Eddie,” you moaned, your fingers gripping more of the blanket as he worked his magic with his tongue. He grazed the sensitive spot with his teeth and you whimpered which let him know that he could continue. He applied a little more pressure with his teeth, loving the sounds that the action elicited from you.
“So good, Eds. Need more.” You were desperate for whatever he was going to give you, not caring at all what it was, just as long it felt as good as him giving you head.
“Oh, this is just the appetizer, hon.” He dove into your cunt once more, shoving his tongue inside of it, causing you to moan the loudest you ever had.
“Fuck, Eddie, more.” He swirled his tongue around and around and you made the most beautiful sounds he had ever heard in his life, knowing that they’d still ring in his head after the night was over.
After a couple more moans, he removed his face from your pussy and practically threw himself on top of you, pressing his lips to yours in a filthy kiss, his tongue swirling around your mouth.
“See how good you taste, honey?” He asked. “Wanna taste you all the time.”
“And I’ll let you,” you responded. “Whenever you want.”
“I love the sound of that.” He slotted his lips between yours in a dizzying kiss before pulling away. He then reached for his bedside table and pulled the drawer open before taking out a condom, not even bothering to close the drawer back.
“I don’t think I’m ready,” you told him, your voice barely above a whisper. You knew he wouldn’t ever judge you, but still couldn’t help but feel like he was going to be mad at you. He let the condom fall to the floor then moved himself back on top of you, his hands taking yours, intertwining your fingers.
“Are you mad?” You looked up at him, and his face softened instantly. He would have never been mad at you for that. Maybe he was a little disappointed, but he thought he would have been wrong to blame your for something like that.
“Baby, no, of course I’m not mad at you.” He shook his head, giving your hands a squeeze. He couldn’t have been mad at you if he tried.
“Promise?” You needed constant reassurance or your brain would convince you that he was lying.
“I promise, honey,” he nodded. “How about we put on some pajamas and watch a movie? Anything you want.”
“I’d like that,” you nodded. You really had thought you were ready, but the whole thing still scared you. You really enjoyed everything leading up to it, but still found the penetration part to be too much for you at the moment.
Eddie rolled off of you and pulled out a t-shirt and a pair of sweatpants out of his dresser before tossing them to you. You threw them on while he headed to the bathroom to get ready for bed and still felt anxious about him being mad at you. What you had was so good and you were convinced that you had ruined it.
“I’m not mad at you,” he called from the bathroom. He knew you too well sometimes, always somehow knowing exactly what you were thinking. He knew how prone you were to overthinking and was always there to reassure you that your thoughts were in fact not true.
Eddie emerged from the bathroom and threw on a shirt before throwing himself onto the mattress and rolling back on top of you. He pressed another bruising kiss to your lips, his hands reaching for yours again. He then pulled away, a grin breaking out on his face as he looked down at you.
“I’m not mad at you,” he repeated, burying his face into your neck, snuggling into it.
“I know,” you replied, just like always, but he was never convinced, even though you really did know that he wasn’t mad at you.
“I’m not mad at you,” he said one more time, pressing a kiss to your neck before rolling off you.
He reached for the remote to his tv and turned it on before pulling you to his chest. You both watched the screen mindlessly while your arms wrapped around him. One of his arms draped across your waist while the other hand stroked your hair, something he always did to bring you comfort.
You looked up at him as he watched the tv and couldn’t help but feel lucky to have a best friend like him. Someone who was always there for you no matter what. Someone who would never judge you for anything, no matter what he really thought about it. Someone who you were completely and one hundred percent head over heels for. And maybe, just maybe, one of these days you’d get the guts to tell him how you really felt.
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freedomfireflies · 9 months ago
Text
Pillow Talk*
Summary: The one where you and Harry both have insomnia, and decide to spend one very strange night together.
Word Count: 7.2k
Content Warning: 18+, smut, daddy kink, mentions of drugs, angst (w/ happy ending!), not suitable for Ramadan!
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“Oh, absolutely not.”
“Come on. Just one time.”
“No. Are you out of your fucking mind?”
“Probably. I haven’t slept in 32 hours.”
You huff as you hide yourself behind your door. You don’t even want to see him. Because you don’t want to have this conversation or entertain this idiotic idea. This is what Harry does. He plays games. He tricks and he ruins and if you open this door, you know you’ll regret it. 
“Poppy, please,” he calls, and you hear his forehead land on the wood as though to brace himself. “I’ve tried everything else, okay? It always works with you. I just…I wanted to try. See if it still does.”
You frown. “You realize how wildly inappropriate this is, right? Asking if you can come in just so we can sleep together?”
“Yeah, but that’s all I want to do. Sleep,” he insists again. “Really. I’ll keep my hands to myself and I won’t even talk to you.”
You consider this. Truthfully, you haven’t slept all that well since the breakup, either. And sure, you’ve longed for the nights when the two of you would fall into such an easy, simple, and incredibly effective routine. 
But he broke your heart. And now you’re both paying the price.
“Just one night,” he pleads again. “And if it doesn’t work, I swear I won’t bother you ever again.”
There’s a subtle ache in your chest. Just hearing his voice reminds you of the pain. Of the joy. Of every good moment and every bad one, all wrapped up in the same silky cadence.
You take a deep breath. Perhaps you’re curious, too. Even if you don’t want to be. Because maybe this will work. Maybe you’ll finally be able to rest and get on with your life.
Or maybe it won’t.
But at least if it doesn’t, maybe you can find some closure.
So, with that thought…you open the door. 
He looks worse than you’ve ever seen him. Which makes you just a touch happy if you’re being honest with yourself. His usual curls are askew and unkept. The bags under his eyes are dark and his clothes are wildly wrinkled.
And you’re surprised. He’s been up for longer than 32 hours before and handled it much better. You wonder if his age is catching up with him or if there’s something else keeping him awake.
It wouldn’t be the first time.
But you don’t fight with him. He’s not here to fight and you accept his terms as you widen the door and allow him to step inside.
He nods gratefully as he slips into your living room, but his eyes linger on your face. Almost like he doesn’t recognize you, and it makes your insides turn as you shut the door and put a few feet between you.
“What?” you huff.
He shakes his head. “I don’t know, you look…different.”
“Okay…?”
“You changed your hair.”
“Yeah.”
“Hm. It’s nice.”
You cross your arms. “Thanks.”
“Sure.”
Another pause, and the silence feels heavy.
“Well…do you wanna…?” you eventually say, and he nods.
“Right, yeah.”
“Okay.”
You turn to lead him to your room and it’s…unsettling how normal it feels. Like an old habit rearing its ugly head once again.
When you get there, his surprise returns. “You changed your room, too.”
“Yeah.”
“Oh. Why?”
Your eyes roll as you angrily toss your blankets back. “This is the one room I associated with you the most. And short of moving, I needed something you hadn’t touched or tainted. So I made the room mine again.”
He thinks about this, attention lingering on the new paint on the walls and the new furniture in each corner. “I like it.”
“I don’t care.”
He smiles. “I know.”
“Great. Can you get in the bed please so we can get this over with?”
Obliging, he slips off his shoes and joins you under the duvet. “Never thought I’d hear you say that again.”
“Never thought I’d have to say it.”
“Mm. You changed your mattress.”
“Obviously.”
“And the sheets and blankets, too.”
“Uh-huh.”
“Is there anything in here you didn’t change?”
“The carpet. But only because my landlord said I couldn’t.”
“Right.” He’s smiling again. “But you did get a rug.”
“Yeah.”
“It’s nice.”
“Bite me.”
He laughs now and you want to smack him. “I see you still get grumpy when you’re tired.”
“No, I get grumpy when my asshole of an ex shows up to my apartment at 3 in the morning demanding to be let in so he can sleep in my bed with me like a fucking child,” you argue. And you know you’re being snippy and maybe even rude, but he deserves it. After everything he’s put you through, you deserve to be in charge of your own emotions. 
You turn the lamp off and the dark room grows incredibly quiet. You’re both stiff, unable to relax when you’re this close. You don’t want to touch—not the way you used to. And you don’t want to be close or let your guard down, although you suppose you’ll have to in order to sleep.
And then he says, “I really did try, you know. To find another way to sleep.”
You look up at the ceiling and release a soft exhale. “Okay.”
“Melatonin, light therapy, cut out coffee. Even drank those…sleep mocktail things everyone talks about.” He shifts. “I don’t know, I guess my brain just wouldn’t turn off.”
“Yeah. I know.”
More quiet.
“I haven’t done any since we broke up,” he finally says. Gentle, like he’s afraid to break the silence. 
Your lashes flutter. He doesn’t have to say it for you to know what he means. “Great.”
“Yeah.” Another beat. “I thought it was work, I guess. Maybe the stress or something. I’ve been sleeping fine, but these past couple weeks…”
“Right.”
“And I just figured—”
“No, I got it. It’s fine, let’s just…let’s just try to sleep,” you say and he nods.
The bedroom settles and you try, you really do. But you can’t when he’s breathing so goddamn loud and shifting every two seconds and sighing like he’s in pain.
“What?” you eventually hiss.
“Are you dating someone?” he asks.
“What?”
“Are you dating someone?” he repeats. “Josie said you were.”
You hesitate. “I don’t know. Kind of. I guess.”
“You guess?”
“We’re…we’ve been on a few dates. It’s not official.”
“He hasn’t asked you to be his girlfriend?”
“Why does it matter?”
“I don’t know. It doesn’t. I just figure you deserve someone that actually wants to date you.”
“Oh, do I?” You roll your head to look at him. “Funny, you didn’t seem to think so when you were dating me.”
“All right, touché,” he mumbles. “I could have been better, I know that. And I know I took advantage. You did a lot for me and I didn’t…I didn’t care.”
Surprised, you twist your fingers together. “Uh…yeah. Right. Thank you.”
His head rolls, too. And even with the dim-light, his eyes find yours. “I’m sorry, Poppy. You really did deserve better than me. And if you found it with this guy…I’ll be happy for you.”
You swallow before sighing to yourself. “I mean, I don’t know if I did. He’s…he’s really nice. But he’s so…he’s just…”
“Vanilla?”
Your eyes widen. “Yeah. How did you—”
“He was wearing Crocs with tube socks.”
You laugh—loud. “Oh my god, how did you know?”
“I might have looked him up,” he admits through a grin. “Wanted to make sure he was worth your time.”
“Yeah? And?”
“And he wears Crocs with tube socks. He can’t make you cum.”
Your features scrunch together as you gasp and look away. “Ew, Harry. It’s not about that—”
“It’s always about that. Come on, am I wrong?”
“You—yes. What he wears has nothing to do with what he’s like in bed—”
“So he’s not vanilla?”
“He’s…” You pause. “He…look, he really tries—”
“So, he is,” Harry finishes for you. “Well, at least you got some.”
“I…yeah. Uh-huh.”
Instantly, he turns onto his side, head resting in the palm of his hand as he studies you. “He couldn’t get it up, could he?”
“Harry,” you groan, and reach out to swat him. “Stop, it wasn’t that. We just…we were taking things slow. We did some stuff. Just not…all of it.”
“So what he’d do?”
“Harry—”
“Come on, we’re adults, just tell me.”
“Ew, no—”
“Listen, you used to get fucked good. I’m just trying to help you get back to that.”
You frown but do oblige. “I don’t know. He ate me out and I blew him. That’s it.”
“And…?”
“And…I don’t know. He was fine. He was good.”
“Sure.”
Your eyes roll. “Okay, he…he wasn’t really all that into it. He stopped after a few seconds and asked if I came. Then he said his jaw was tired and that maybe we should just switch.”
Now, Harry’s features scrunch, too. “Shit. What a fucking pussy. Ironically.”
“I guess. It could have been worse.”
“Really? Eating you out was always my favorite. What kind of asshole just stops if he doesn’t have to?”
You feel a rush of heat through your body as you look away. “I guess they can’t all be you.”
“Damn fucking right,” he scoffs. “Seriously, you still wanted to see him after that?”
“He’s cute,” you argue. “And nice. And yeah, maybe he’s not that adventurous but that’s okay. I don’t need wild sex all the time.”
He’s quiet. “How about just one time?”
You turn back. “What?”
“I—okay, I was just thinking…you know, one of the things we would do when we couldn’t sleep was…fuck, so—”
“Oh, absolutely not.” You sit up, as though to put some distance between you. “No. Forget it—”
“Poppy—”
“Don’t call me that,” you huff. “You don’t get to call me that ever again. Okay, I’m not gonna fuck you just so we can sleep—”
“It wouldn’t be just for that,” he argues, sitting up as well. “It would also help your mood, too—”
“Oh, my mood?” You glare at him. “My mood is just fine, actually. In fact, I’d say it’s pretty good if I agreed to let you in my apartment in the first place—”
“You didn’t have to. I’m just saying, if sex with him is gonna be bland, might as well get in one last good fuck before you commit to a lifetime of boring—”
“Oh, my god. It’s not a lifetime and you’re a fucking asshole—”
“Yeah. We’ve established that. Doesn’t change the fact that you need it.”
You stare at him. “Is that why you’re really here? To trick me into sleeping with you?”
He leans back. “What? No. I don’t trick people into having sex, it was just a suggestion—”
“Yeah, a pretty dumb one. Did you honestly think I’d say yes?”
“Yeah,” he admits haughtily. “Yeah, because we didn’t break up over the sex. We broke up because you’re an uptight—”
“What? Say it,” you sneer. “Say it. I’m an uptight bitch because I wouldn’t let you do cocaine.”
He scoffs again and looks off into the dark of your room. The argument lulls. “I could never do anything right.”
“That wasn’t the problem and you know it.” You pull your legs to your chest. “I wanted to move forward and you kept going back. You’re almost 30 and you still act like you’re 19.”
“Maybe I didn’t want to get married and do the whole white picket fence life,” he says. “Maybe I liked things the way they were—”
“No. No, you liked parties with your friends and doing drugs that kept you up for hours  and getting fired and leaving me to pay all the bills—”
“You didn’t pay all the bills and I told you I would do what I could to help—”
“Yeah. But apparently that included getting fucked up and staying out all night just to crash the next day.” You study him closely. “You were never around anymore. I never saw you. We were on two different paths and the only time we ever talked was when you asked if I wanted to fuck.”
“So, that’s it, huh? I’m just a villain in your story. You were this perfect fucking princess, and I was a monster that ruined your life?”
“No, obviously not. I wasn’t perfect. I know that.”
“Do you?” His eyes flick between yours. “You didn’t want me to move forward with you. You liked your new job and your new friends because they didn’t remind you of me. Of who we both used to be.”
“So? I’m not proud of what I used to do. And sure, maybe I wanted to make a better impression on the people paying my salary and keeping me employed. Is that such a fucking crime?”
“No. But you didn’t want me to be a part of that impression and you know it.”
“Right. Because you were shit-faced all the time.”
He opens his mouth, ready to retort. But then he closes it. He closes it and he stares at you and then…he surges forward.
Even if you were given at least two seconds to prepare, you’re not prepared for the way his hands feel on your cheeks as he kisses you. As he presses his lips to yours and steals the labored breaths in your lungs.
But you don’t fight him. You know you should. Know you should push him off and berate him. Yet you let him kiss you. And you kiss him back. And it’s far too easy to slip back into this routine as his tongue slides against yours in such a teasing way.
Your stomach flips while your hands land on his lap. You’re desperate to be closer, to feel his body against yours. His skin, and the way it melts beneath your palms like butter. You dance this devious dance and before you know it, you’re stripping each other of the few clothes you have.
He starts with your shirt. Ripping it over your head before his mouth lands on your chest. Bare and beautiful to him. His kisses are wet and sloppy and you arch yourself closer as you drag your fingers down his scalp.
The only reason he stops is to let you peel his t-shirt off, too. And then his jeans and socks. And you move so fluidly, you’re nearly naked in under a minute. The only thing left between you now his underwear and yours.
He lays you down, gentle. Surprisingly gentle, given the anger that brought you here. And he gazes at you in a soft, unspoken way that says everything you don’t exactly know how to say. 
His fingers brush down your cheek as his body settles atop yours. He still fits between your legs like he was always meant to and the weight of him almost feels good.
“Are you all right?” he finally whispers, and he doesn’t sound like the same man from before. He sounds like the man you fell in love with. “Is this okay?”
You nod quickly, scared that if you think about it, you’ll ruin it. “Yeah. Go.”
He doesn’t. “We don’t have to,” he says. “You were right, it’s probably a dumb idea—”
“Yeah, but…it always works.” You shift beneath him and reach for his briefs, rolling them down his hips. “And I’m tired. Tired of fighting with you, tired of not getting any sleep…tired of pretending I hate you. You were right, our sex is good. So let’s do it. And then we can sleep. And we can finally move on.”
Not the most romantic of speeches, but it works. At least right now. He kisses you again and drags your underwear aside in order to tease you with the tip of his cock.
He feels like you remember. And maybe you find just a touch of comfort in that. There are no awkward pauses or confusion about what to do next. You don’t have to find your rhythm or anticipate the next step. You know him. And he knows you.
Your rub your clit in order to stimulate yourself. You aren’t exactly wet enough for this to be enjoyable, but you don’t expect him to do what he did before. The foreplay is up to you now and you’re more than all right with that.
However, he’s not. And he instantly swats your hand away in order to do it himself. Allowing his fingers to drag up and down your pussy until you shiver before he slips the tip of his middle finger inside.
“Shit,” he whispers. His forehead drops to yours. “Fucking missed this.”
You bite the inside of your lip to keep from grinning. “Yeah?”
“Yeah.” He starts to pump, bending your body to his salacious intentions until the unmistakable sound of wetness echoes throughout the room. “I know you missed it, too.”
“Hm. Don’t push it.”
“Why not?” He presses a kiss to your cheek. Then to your jaw. Your lips. Your nose. Your neck. Everywhere you used to love. “Are you really gonna tell me you didn’t?” 
“Maybe.”
“So Crocs with Tube Socks is better, huh?”
“…not exactly.”
“Right.” He adds a second finger and your eyes roll back. “Don’t worry, Poppy, I’ll fix it.”
“Don’t…call me that,” you pant again, and he chuckles.
“Don’t know what else to call you. You were always my pretty Poppy.”
“But now I’m not,” you say. “Now you call me nothing. Because I’m not yours to call.”
He sighs but does seem to obey, at least for now. And the faster he thrusts his hand, the needier this growing feeling becomes. Stronger and louder until you finally grab onto his shoulders and say, “Just put it in already.”
He smirks. “How romantic.”
“It’s not supposed to be. Just come on.”
So, he does. He takes hold of his cock and he slips it through the gathering arousal until he can push in. And you both reel.
Truthfully, you’ve missed the sounds he makes when he’s turned on. The way he groans and grits his teeth together. The way the muscles in his arms strain until you can see those beautiful veins you used to love to run your tongue over. 
He’s stunning. Even now, in the soft light of the moon through your curtains. His silhouette is unholy as it hovers above you. Strong hips beginning to thrust as you both work in tandem to find release.
And it’s closer than you expected. There’s something about him that can get you there even without much effort. Something Crocs with Tube Socks could never seem to figure out. 
Because he’s not Harry. And only Harry can play you like an instrument and make such symphonic music all with the flick of his finger and a thrust of his cock.
He kisses you again and you both feel anxious. Soft murmurings of praise and, “Keep going,” that have you arching from the bed and moaning into his mouth.
You’re sweating and gasping for air and clutching onto his back as you attempt to meet his rhythm with rolls of your own. You need this. You need to cum so you can find release and you need to cum so you can finally sleep and you need to cum because then you’ll finally be able to let him go. To close the door on the chapter of you and Harry and move the fuck on.
But how can you move on when you’re still under him? How can you insist that you’re fine and doing great if you’re so easily convinced to fuck him just so you can both get some sleep?
There are other remedies to insomnia that don’t involve his cock and maybe you should have tried that before you let him into your apartment. 
Either way, you’re coming before you can think twice about it. Raking your nails down his back and whimpering his name as he pulls out and finishes on your thigh. 
And just like that…
It’s over.
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You find him in the kitchen about an hour later. You managed to sleep at least a few minutes before you felt the sadistic hand of insomnia pull you back out. But when you woke, Harry was gone. His clothes were still on the floor, so you knew he hadn’t left. But he wasn’t with you.
He’s staring out your kitchen window when you slip into the living room. You’re not sure if he hears you or not but if he does, he doesn’t acknowledge it. Instead, he keeps himself braced against the sink, clad in nothing more than his briefs.
Curious, you call, “What’s wrong?”
He shakes his head. Silent. Contemplative. “I used to love this window,” he eventually says. Soft, like he’s reminiscing. “The way the light looked in the morning. The way your little crystals would put rainbows on the wall and you’d get so excited. How you’d make me dance with you to some Elton John song while we were literally in the middle of cooking.”
You blink. “Um…okay.”
He turns and his eyes find yours. “I fucking loved this apartment. And this kitchen. And that couch. And your room. And even the hallway. I loved being here, all the time. I hated going back to my place because it never felt the same.”
The silence grows louder now as you look down at your feet and pull your robe just a bit tighter. “I know,” you finally whisper. “That’s why I changed it.”
“I know,” he whispers back. His expression falls. “You changed everything. This apartment, your life…us.”
“Because I had to,” you argue, glancing back up. “I had to, Harry. I couldn’t keep going in circles. I couldn’t drag you along behind me into the future when you clearly wanted to be anywhere else.” 
“Because the future you always painted didn’t seem to have room for me,” he huffs. “Okay, with all these dinner parties and fancy houses and good school districts. You’d planned out the next 30 years and I didn’t see myself anywhere in your picture.”
“I didn’t fucking care about the parties or the school districts,” you nearly yell. “God, I—I didn’t want the white picket fence life. I didn’t want the 1950’s American Dream shit you keep thinking I did. I just wanted you. Yes, I wanted a good job with insurance and stability. But I wasn’t gonna trade what we had just for that—”
“But you did. You didn’t tell your parents we’d moved in together. You didn’t even tell half of our friends. You went on trips without me and you stopped telling me about your day and we never talked—”
“Because you were never around! You were either out with your friends getting drunk or high or you were in there playing video games because you’d had a ‘hard day.’ So, no. I didn’t want to talk to you when I knew you weren’t even listening in the first place.”
 He leans against the counter and crosses his arms. Angry. Indignant. “You resented me. You resented the fact that we were together and you resented that I wasn’t perfect like your precious new friends—”
“Oh, that’s—” You pinch the bridge of your nose and force in a deep breath. “No. I didn’t want you to be like them. I didn’t want you to act pretentious and stuffy and talk about the stock market every goddamn second of the day. The only thing I resented…was the fact that you wouldn’t take care of yourself.”
“I was taking care of myself—”
“Bullshit. You were doing drugs—you were doing cocaine—and you weren’t eating, you weren’t sleeping, you nearly drunk yourself to death—”
“Right, but I wasn’t doing it all the time. It was just…it was occasionally, and it wasn’t a lot—”
“I don’t care. You shouldn’t have been doing it at all, Harry,” you finally shout. “You…you scared the shit out of me. Every time one of your friends would call and say you were passed out, I thought…I thought this was it. I thought I was gonna lose you. Do you know how many times I just sat on the floor and cried because I was so scared? Because you never wanted to listen when I told you to stop? Because you were so sure you were invincible?”
He seems pained by this, features wilting as he takes a tentative step forward. But he stops when you move back. “Poppy, I wasn’t trying to scare you, I…I didn’t know—”
“Yes, you did,” you scoff. “I told you, over and over that I didn’t want to lose you, but you thought I was being dramatic.”
He nods once. “I know, I’m sorry.”
“You’re sorry?”
“Yeah. I am.” He looks at you. “S’why I stopped after we broke up. You were right, I needed to get my shit together.”
You nod, too. “Good. I’m glad.”
His gaze dances around the kitchen. “I hate that you changed everything,” he says again, and your heart wrenches. “I hate that it doesn’t look like it used to. I hate that I hurt you so bad that you felt like you had to erase everything I ever touched.”
You step closer and wipe a tear from your cheek. “Yeah, I hate it, too. I hate that I had to. I hate that stupid mattress and I hate that my kitchen doesn’t look like a rainbow anymore and I really fucking hate that I have no one to dance with when I cook.”
His eyes soften as they find yours and in only a few seconds, he’s reaching for the belt on your robe and tugging you to him. Wrapping you in his arms as he presses you against his chest, the way he always used to when you were sad.
“No,” you argue weakly, although you do nothing to stop him. “No, you can’t…you can’t—”
“Yes, I can,” he retorts quietly. You feel his lips press to the top of your head. “You don’t get to cry over me anymore. You’re better than that now. You did what I couldn’t. You moved on. And I don’t get to ruin that for you.”
You sniffle as you run your hand down his stomach. “It wasn’t about moving on. I just needed to learn how to be strong enough for both of us.”
“Poppy,” he breathes and holds you tighter. “You shouldn’t have to be.”
And deep down…you know he’s right.
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“Shit, just like that…a little closer. Good girl, hold yourself open for me, baby. Yeah.”
Doing your best to oblige, you slip your fingers between your folds as Harry nudges his nose closer. Kissing his way along your thighs before allowing his tongue to lick a very generous stripe up your pussy.
Round 2 is on the couch. Harry wanted the kitchen counter—nearly insisted on it, in fact—but you knew you didn’t want to ruin your favorite breakfast spot. And you weren’t about to just for him.
So, the couch it was. He complained about it as you got settled. He hates this new couch, too. The color, the lumpy cushions, the way it feels like you’re sinking when you sit. 
You told him you didn’t care. You loved it and if it annoyed him, that was a bonus.
Thankfully, he swallowed his complaints in favor of swallowing you. He tossed your robe open and pulled your thighs apart. And then he buried himself between the warmth of your pussy the way he always used to.
And you decided that maybe you don’t mind insomnia so much if this is the remedy.
“Missed this, too,” he says now as he nips at your clit. “God, you’ve always tasted so fucking good. S’fucking crazy, baby. Can’t ever get enough.”
“Sure,” you snort, head dropping back. “I’m sure you say that to all the girls—”
“No.” He shakes his head and his nose nudges the sensitive nerves as you whine. “No, there’s no other girls. Come on, did you really think there could be?”
“With a mouth like that? Yeah,” you admit. He laughs. “That’s how we met. You were such—fuck—such a player.”
“Maybe,” he concedes before mouthing at you again. “But nobody else has ever made me feel the way you do.”
You snort. “Where’d you learn that line?”
“It’s not a line. It’s the truth.”
“Harry. Come on. I know you.”
“Then you should know I don’t say shit I don’t mean.” He smooths his palms down your thighs in order to spread you just a bit further and see the way your hole flutters. “Oh, pretty girl. S’just drenched, hm? All sensitive from the last one…need Daddy to make it better?”
You scrunch your nose. “You don’t get to call yourself that anymore.”
“No?” He grins. “Why not?”
“Because I hate you and Daddy is reserved for someone I like.”
He tsks. “I don’t know, kind of seems like you still like it. Keep clenching around my tongue like you wanna hear me say it again.”
You hesitate as you weave your fingers through his curls. “Never.”
He hums and the vibration against your cunt makes your thighs twitch. “Come on, baby. Don’t be mean to Daddy.”
You want to glare. Slap at him, refuse him. But he’s right—you have missed the moniker. If only just because of how good he sounds when he says it. So, you let him tease you and taunt you as he tastes you. You let him do whatever the hell he wants because your second orgasm feels stronger than the first and you don’t imagine you’ll survive this one. 
He slips a finger in as well. Beckons your pleasure closer with every curl of the large digit. It’s practiced. He sucks and licks and nips and thrusts and curls and pumps all at the same time.
Then, he pulls back and brings his palm down in a sharp smack to your pussy. 
“Stop squirming,” he instructs, then shoots you an obviously pleased frown. “Don’t be a brat.”
“M’not,” you whimper. “Not a brat…just wanna cum.”
“Do you, hm?” He licks you again then adds two fingers. “Should I let you?”
“Obviously.”
“Obviously?” He’s smirking now as he starts to go faster. “Maybe you’re right. Maybe you do deserve it. Yeah? After being so nice as to let me in.”
You pout. “Mhm.”
He’s so happy. He’s always his happiest when he’s suffocating himself with your pussy. He does everything he knows you love. He leaves teasing kisses to the inside of your thighs. He slaps at your leg, your clit, your hip. He helps rock you against his tongue and even lifts you from the couch to find a deeper angle. 
And he does all of this out of sheer enjoyment. 
“Harry,” you whimper as you melt into the cushions. Your limbs feel like jello. The pleasure is everywhere, and he looks like a god. His face is covered in you, glistening about as bright as the stars.
“I know, Poppy,” he says. He kisses your pussy and then smiles at you. “I know.”
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You like the way Harry’s chest feels. Warm and soft and painted in the tattoos you used to trace with your finger.
He’s gently scratching your back as you both lay in bed. The room is quiet—you haven’t spoken in minutes. Still, neither of you can seem to find sleep and you know you’ll desperately need it soon. 
But this is nice. Even if it is the last time. You like getting to reminisce—pretend for even a moment that things are the way they used to be. When you were happy and safe and content to be together.
You weren’t sure you’d ever feel this kind of peace again.
“I missed you, too, you know,” he whispers after a moment.
You glance up. 
“I didn’t just miss your apartment. I missed you.” He takes a breath and runs his palm along your spine. “I miss our Sunday mornings and I miss when we’d watch scary movies just so we could make out and I miss the way you used to dance around in your underwear to some stupid musical you were obsessed with.”
You swallow a lump in your throat. “Har…”
“And I don’t know what happened,” he says. “I felt like…I felt like I was watching you do all these amazing things and I just couldn’t keep up. You were getting promoted and moving up and I was still at the fucking bar serving drinks. And you knew what you wanted to do. I didn’t.”
“I didn’t know,” you argue gently. “Not really. I hate my job. I hate that I don’t enjoy it the way I used to. I mean, I like that it pays the bills, but maybe that shouldn’t be enough.”
He presses his cheek to the top of your head. “You should do what makes you happy.”
“You used to make me happy.”
The soft strokes against your spine slow. 
“You did, Har,” you tell him. “So happy. That’s why I hated that we started fighting all of the time. I hated that you were gone or that I was gone or the fact that I was too ashamed to tell you that I missed you. And that I was scared we were losing each other.”
“Maybe we needed to lose each other,” he says and you feel sick. “Maybe we needed to be apart to see what we really wanted.”
You think about this. The idea sounds nice. Inviting. A happy end to a rather dreadful story.
But you both know better. Five months has taught you better.
“There’s a reason we broke up,” you finally murmur. “We didn’t…we didn’t like each other anymore. We were holding each other back—”
“I liked you,” he says softly. “I loved you. Yeah, I was mad, but I didn’t just stop loving you.” 
“Maybe you should have. Maybe it would have been easier for us and we wouldn’t be…here.”
More silence. It stretches for what feels like hours.
And then, “I can’t sleep because of you.”
You suck in a quiet breath. “What?”
“When Josie told me that you were seeing someone, I couldn’t…I couldn’t stop thinking about it. And she showed me a picture she took of you guys and you were so happy. Smiling at him like you used to smile at me and I just…I didn’t know what to do.”
Another pause. You don’t know what to say.
“I put my fist through a wall,” he tells you. “And somehow, that still didn’t hurt as much as knowing you’d moved on.”
You snake your arm around his middle and snuggle closer. “Harry, you knew we both had to move on eventually.”
“Did we?”
“Harry…”
“But so soon? It’s only been five months.”
“Yeah. Five months to grieve you and cry over you and realize I did this for you.” You close your eyes. Tight. “We’re better people now.”
“No, we’re tired people now,” he teases, and you smile. “And I think I’ll be losing sleep over you for the rest of my life.”
“Don’t say that.”
“I mean it. I’m always gonna think about you. Think about what I did wrong. What I could have done better.”
“I fucked up, too,” you argue. “I should have told my parents. And our friends. I should have talked to you more, asked you to do more things together. You’re right, I was ashamed of you. Of this…routine we’d fallen into. And I’m sorry.”
He says nothing. After all, there’s nothing more to say.
But he kisses the crown of your head and it speaks louder than any words.
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“Fuck…fuck, Poppy, please—”
You grin as you lick your lips. He’s always sounded the most beautiful when he’s begging. And his best begging always tends to happen when his cock is down your throat. 
“What, Daddy?” you ask innocently. “What do you need me to do?”
His eyes roll back and he grips the sheets in his fist. “Please…”
You reposition yourself over his legs as you dip back down to have another taste. You lick and you suck and you stroke until he’s making another strained noise that sounds like sex.
You hope your neighbors can hear. You bet they missed him.
“Good boy,” you purr, squeezing his thighs as you take him even further. 
He sucks in a sharp breath through gritted teeth before his hand finds your hair and he squeezes. “Easy…easy, baby. S’been a while. Don’t hurt yourself—”
You respond to his instruction by inhaling through your nose and relaxing the muscles in your throat. Allowing him to hit the back the way he always used to.
His head drops into the pillows. “Shit—Poppy, I mean it. M’not gonna fuck your throat. It’s gonna hurt and I don’t wanna hurt you anymore.”
It’s an oddly thoughtful gesture but it does nothing for you now. Instead, you shake your head and pull off, a string of saliva dripping down his cock in your wake. “I’m fine, H. Trust me, I can take it.”
“Yeah?” He pushes up onto his elbows. “Is Crocs with Tube Socks hung or something?”
You grin. “No. But that dildo you got me last year is.”
He blinks. “You…fucking hell, you fuck your throat with that?”
“Mhm.” You swirl your tongue around his tip as he curses. “And then I fuck myself. And I pretend it’s you.”
He tightens his hold on your hair and forces your eyes back to his. “Are you serious?”
You nod, now feeling a touch shy as you wipe your mouth with your knuckles. “Yeah…I know that’s…probably weird, but…I mean, you got it for me, so I thought I’d be weirder to think about someone else—”
“No, it’s…” He stops. Struggles. “Shit, I really needed to hear that.”
“Oh, you did, huh?” 
“Yeah. I wouldn’t want you to think about anyone else when you used it, either. It’s got my fucking initials on it.”
You laugh, louder than you mean to and it makes him grin. “Yeah, it does, doesn’t it? It was a pretty good gift, I’ll admit.”
“S’a fucking perfect gift,” he retorts. “We had a lot of fun with that dildo.”
“We did indeed.”
“But apparently not as much fun as you’re having with it.”
“Fucking myself helps me sleep,” you remind him. “So sometimes it’s necessity.”
“Is that right?” 
“Mhm.” You squeeze the base and he twitches. “You used to watch me. Remember?”
“I do.” His eyes get darker. “Do you fuck yourself a lot?”
“…these days, yeah. Apparently, I can’t sleep all that well, either.”
“And does it work?”
“Most of the time, yeah.” You turn your attention back to his cock in order to avoid his curiosity before you quietly admit, “Sometimes I pretend you’re here. Sleeping next to me. And…that helps, too.”
He reaches for your wrist and pulls your attention back. “Poppy—”
“No, don’t look at me like that, it’s dumb—”
“I imagine you, too.”
You blink. “You do?”
“Every night. Except the past couple weeks. Cause now I just think about you and him. And then I can’t fucking sleep.”
You turn your hand so your fingers brush through his. “Shit. We’re a mess.”
He smiles. “Yeah.”
The conversation falls away as you dip back down to resume your work. Squeezing his balls, moaning as you take him on your tongue, and milking him for every last drop. 
Turns out, you missed the taste of him, too.
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Morning comes before either of you find a moment of rest. But you can feel yourself growing tired. Your eyelids are beginning to droop, and your body feels incredibly spent. 
Turns out, round 4 is where the magic happened. He brought out your favorite vibrator and teased your poor, swollen clit with it until you squirted. It was easy and quick and he seemed rather delighted to be bathed in you.
Until, of course, you insist on an actual bath to clean you both.
The shower felt good. The warm water washing away the sticky sweat on your skin. And the two of you fell back into a similar routine. He ran the soap down your arms and you washed his curls with your favorite shampoo. A shampoo he claimed he looked everywhere for after you broke up but could never find.
He said he missed the smell. The way it made his hair so soft. And the way it would make his pillowcase smell just like you.
You were grateful that the shower hid your tears.
You both crashed on the couch after you had dried off. The sheets still needed to be cleaned and neither of you could be bothered. But, as it turned out, the couch was growing on him. And he begrudgingly admitted it was rather comfy as the two of you curled up in your usual spot. 
You know you’re both close to sleep. Finally, after all your efforts to get here. But you also know that once you wake up, Harry will leave. 
And there’s a chance you won’t see him again.
You know that nothing has changed. The two of you still want different things, even if you want each other. And you hate that that’s not enough. That what you want and what you should want don’t align.
Instead, he’ll move on with his life and you’ll move on with yours.
But you don’t want to learn how to fall asleep without him.
“Make me a deal,” you whisper.
He hums. Lashes shut tight as the morning light slips in through the window. “What?”
“If I wake up, and you’re still here…we do this again. Not…as a couple. But as two broken humans that find rest with each other.”
His eyes open.
“But if you’re gone,” you continue, “then we don’t. We don’t do it again, we don’t see each other again, we don’t reach out again. We cut ties. Officially. Block and move on. For real.”
He seems saddened by this, and you hate that you’ve made him sad. But you both know it’s for the best. This won’t be sustainable in the long run. And maybe it’s a bad idea to continue at all, but maybe you want to hold on to him anyway. At least for a little while.
Even if it’s just as friends.
Exes.
Two broken humans that used to make each other whole.
His lips press together and he nods once. “Deal,” he agrees, and you can tell by the look on his face, he’s already made a decision.
You aren’t sure which way, but you suppose you’ll find out soon enough. So, you allow your eyes to fall shut and your dreams to take hold. Melting into his arms and into the sofa as you finally find sleep quicker than you have in months.
You’re not sure how long you’re out. It feels like hours. A heavy slumber that leaves you rather refreshed as your eyes eventually flutter open. 
You don’t see Harry as you slowly adjust to your surroundings. And you don’t feel him, either. But you’re too afraid to really look. To sit up and realize that he’s gone. For good.
And then, just when you think you’ve lost him…you hear the most beautiful sound in the world.
“Good morning, Poppy.”
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Taglist: @walkingintheheartbreaksatellite @keepdrivingkisses @swiftmendeshoran @tiredinwinter @straightontilmornin @justlemmeadoreyou @harrysdaydreams @tiaamberxx @peterparker1sgf @myfavfanficsever @littlenatilda @vamprry @fdl305 @tchalametishot @ssaama @indierockgirrl @likeapplejuicenpeach @vane28282 @lukesaprince @closureesny @lc-fics @0nlythrowharrybeaux @hannahdressedasabanana @iguessyourejustwhatineeded @dylanobandposts21 @butdaddyilovehim-hs @floral-recs @itjustkindahappenedreally @samanddeaninatrenchcoat @laelamarley @myalovesharry
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occamstfs · 30 days ago
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Talismen: Beginnings
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Nicky emerges with an arcane artifact after a bewildering trip through an impossible shop. In wishing his boyfriend was more confident in himself Nicky performs irrevocable and accidental magic upon the world, building his new form and dulling his mind.
And I'm back! Here's the first story of my planned CYOA series, a little long but I love how it turned out! I'll be posting the poll for Part two on Sunday, the 1st of December, the planned options are at the end of the story and it'll only last a day so if you want to take part be on the lookout! At any rate, hope you enjoy and happy to write for you once more! -Occam
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It was barbarian weekend at the renaissance festival. Nicky was dressed as a wizard and his boyfriend, Simon, had long planned to go on theme and dress as a barbarian. Though as the day neared and Simon anxiously stared at his decidedly standard figure in the mirror, he instead opted to just throw on a cloak and call it a day. Arriving at the fair the pair, as expected of the theme, find themselves surrounded by burly men clad in kilts with faux fur draped atop chests beyond impressive.
Gawking at hot men is of course par for the course of this kinda event but Nicky can’t help but read the shame and embarrassment creeping into Simon’s expression as he takes in the festivities. When they eventually step into a tavern for a breather Nicky checks in, “Heyyy babe? Everything good? Seem kinda down-” Simon shakes his head and forces a smile, “Don’t worry about me B, I’m aces!” He tosses a wink out for good measure before pointedly changing the topic, “So what was it you said you’re looking to grab this year?”
Nicky narrows his eyes for half a moment wondering if he should push or challenge his clearly sulking boyfriend before deciding to let the sleeping dog lie for now, “Mmmm, I don’t know actually? Probably just an accessory for the costume? Oh! Or maybe some dice?” Simon’s expression changes into a more genuine smile as he grabs at Nicky’s arm and massages it, “Well here’s an idea. We’re right by the dice shop yeah? Howsabout we split up. I’ll grab us some beers and you go check out the offerings. Meet back here?” 
Wordlessly agreeing, Nicky leans in for a kiss and relaxes at Simon seemingly perking up. Heading off with a nod, Nicky exits the tavern, preventing him from seeing his boyfriend’s facade fade once more as he contemplates getting a drink or two ahead of his partner before his return from the shops. 
Under the impression that Simon has cheered back up, Nick is off to the races. Dice shop just across the way he begins his short trek when suddenly there’s a buzzing in the back of his mind. The sounds of the crowd around him eerily fade as if his ears are waterlogged, he shakes his head from the sudden discomfort and takes a moment to see if anyone else seems to be affected. Before he’s able to inspect his fellow festival-goers he is shocked to see a strange shop he’s never seen before.
Nestled in between a printing press and some soap store Nicky furrows his brow and wonders how he’s possibly missed the shop before now. He’s been coming for years and knows the layout of the festival like the back of his hand. After waiting a few seconds to see if anyone else is entering he takes a cautious step forward and trips as his body tries to take another without his intent. Nicky blushes as he bumps into a brawny barbarian who laughs him off and ruffles his hair, “Watch where yer -urp goin dude huhuh!” Nicky nods an apology and reflexively takes another backwards step towards the apparently new shop. In a sudden need for an expedited retreat from embarrassment, Nicky quickly rushes towards the door and away from the man bumped who eyes him taking a large swig from a tankard. 
He hasn’t the chance to notice that each step towards the shop that should not be there is quicker than the one that came before. In no time at all he tears open the door and is inside the quaint cluttered shop. While his eyes adjust from the bright fall day behind him, he takes in the scene as well as he can. The small space is filled with some bitter herbal scent and the air seems to crackle with something similar to static. Nicky of course attributes the strange prickle on his skin to nerves and continues browsing the curious shop.
There’s no real discernible theme to the shop, really it seems to be more of an antique store than anything else. In any normal situation Nicky would have already dipped back out, but something in the back of his mind keeps pulling him in deeper. Walking past strange dolls and stranger bottled liquids, the almost ticklish sensation continues to assail him with unconscious step forward. His spacial awareness tells him he has wandered further than should be possible but it’s almost as if he has no option to continue forward. Coming up on a curtained doorway Nicky’s hands move as if possessed to part the blinds and his eyes finally lay upon what supernatural, impossible thing must be drawing him inward. 
It would be the perfect accessory for his costume. It would be the perfect accessory to put on and never take off again. It will be perfect. It will be his. He needs it more than anything. His eyes shine with the ruby tinges reflecting off the talisman as he inches towards the pedestal it lies upon. His hand reaches towards the object of his desires and burns as the prickling sensation comes to a head. He grimaces as it turns to an almost boiling heat before his fingers touch it and the impossibly intense sensation instantly disappears. Nicky jumps due to the sudden almost atmospheric change and before recovering he almost has a heart attack as who must be the shopkeep shouts from behind him, “HELLO HELLO YOUNG NICHOLAS!” 
Nicky scrambles to hide behind the pedestal and inspect the mystery man, his vision momentarily tinged scarlet. As the twinges of whatever static sensation filled him moments ago begin to fade totally, he finds himself suddenly able to realize how strange everything about this is. He gulps as he sees a man dressed as a campy wizard adjusting his glasses, “Well it seems you found what you were looking for eh old sport?” Nicky looks down at the still shimmering necklace in his hands, stuttering incoherently as his mind races to understand. 
In the half second his eyes were off the wizardly shopkeep, the man has crept up behind once more. Now throwing an arm around Nicky he helps him to his feet and begins leading away from the curtained room, “Hup hup- Now you must be very careful with your words now young Nicholas. Do tell Simon I said hello hm?” Nicky again looks at the necklace in hand and, hanging to the rational world by a thread, inquires, “P- Pay? Did I pay for this?”  The wizardly man laughs and pats him on the back, “Oh don’t you worry ah ha ha! Hah.” The wizardly man winks, though even doing so there is an after image of a red eye staring into and through Nicky. The younger man opens his mouth to question the clearly mystic magus of the artifact and his intentions though before he gets a chance the wizard shouts.
“Do have fun at the festival my boy!” with that he brusquely pushes Nicky forward and he finds himself outdoors by a printing press and soap shop. Fearful of turning around to see there is no store there Nicky looks down to find himself wearing the talisman. Grabbing at it he finds the same sensation that filled him minutes ago, though muted. Pleasant. He closes his eyes and takes a deep breath before he is again bumped into, this time by someone whose vision is clearly obscured by a mask, “Sho- Shorry!” Nicky sighs and apologizes, though the physical sensation and awkwardness brings him back to reality. Shaking off anxiety and pushing down whatever it is just happened he heads off to meet his boyfriend at the tavern. 
Returning to find Simon housing his third ale, Nicky quickly downs his own to distract from the strange anxiety that remains persuasive in spite of their reunion. Wishing for distraction, it comes swiftly and in short order the pair are out and about enjoying all the festivities that the faire has to offer, various sloppy meats on a stick, bird shows and jesters, and a firework show to cap it all off. The day soars by in short order and Nicky, wanting to forget about his encounter in that place that wasn't, does just that with shocking, almost supernatural, ease. In fact anything Nicky seems to desire almost falls at his feet. With but an imperceptible red shine in his eyes Nicky finds himself wanting for nothing. The same could not be said for his boyfriend.
After sobering up, his dour jealousy for the superior male form returns and as much as Simon tries to hide it from Nicky, the long day has dulled his ability to disguise anything from his boyfriend. On the long walk back to the car Nicky initially avoids bringing it up, but after an eventful day of getting just about everything he desires, he can’t help but try and get to the root of Simon’s sour attitude. “Can you just tell me what’s up babe?” Groaning as he unlocks the car door the weary man answers, “It’s nothing Nick. I’m just- UGH! I wish I wasn’t so self-concious or had actually gone to the gym or-” turning to see Nicky’s puppy dog eyes for not realzing his discomfort Simon groans and apologies, “Don’t worry it’s fine, I um, I had fun!”
Mind flashing back to the barbarian costume that Simon ultimately decided not to wear, love for his boyfriend overwhelms him and he reaches out to hold his lover’s free hand. Hidden underneath his own cloak, Nicky’s talisman flashes red as the sticky staticky sensation returns stronger than it had been even in the shop. He doesn’t whisper or even coherently think the words as he immediately drifts off to sleep in the passenger seat, but the intention is more than enough for the die to be cast. I wish Nicky had more confidence. I wish he was less self-conscious. I wish he was proud of his body. 
Subconscious wish made Nicky’s ruby red eyes remain closed as he falls into an incredibly deep sleep, leaving Simon alone with his thoughts. He squirms slightly behind the wheel as he suddenly feels warm. Mind too muddled to wallow he feels every inch of his body suddenly buzzing with energy, as if an espresso was being dripped into his veins. Looking at his sleeping boyfriend his thoughts shift immediately from self-criticism and body dysmorphia to a lustful, almost primal hunger for his mate. Nicky’s hand still burning hot on his own despite the blaring aircon, he fights the urge to bring the sleeping man’s hand to his cock as it begins to stir. 
Before they’ve even left the parking lot Simon is overwhelmed with a lust for his partner stronger than anything he has felt in some time. Hitting the open road he chews his lip to distract from his cock doing its best to pop the seam in his pants, constantly he’s choking down horny grunts and groans to prevent the sleeping Nicky from waking up. Arriving at their shared home, he struggles to gracefully exit the car with his rod standing firmer than he assumed it could. Eventually making it out, he goes to pick up his still sleepy passenger. 
With a great deal of effort, Simon successfully stills his hips and quiets his lusts to pick up his sleeping suitor. Baring the urges of his body he realizes that the task is far easier than it should be, Nicky’s not heavy but- Any further inquisition is stilled as he reflexively takes a deep breath of his sleeping lover and is promptly overwhelmed. Nicky’s floral shampoo and deodorant mix with b.o. from an unseasonably warm day in the sun and Simon doesn’t have the strength to quiet the grunt that erupts from him as his cock throbs and prods Nicky in the back. 
Eyes blearily open as the sleeping wizard stirs and stretches in the arms of his lover. “Wha? Si?” The self-conscious Simon, embarrassed at waking up his boyfriend quickly puts him down. He blushes as Nicky steadies himself on his arms, still yawning he chastises his boyfriend for letting him fall asleep, “You didn’t *ahwn* didn haf to do tha babe, *awh*” Rubbing his ruby-tinged eyes he can’t quite make out the finer details of his boyfriend, but he would swear he’s looking further up than he usually does to make eye contact. Simon waves him off, “It’s fine, I’m not even tired really.” 
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Leaning down to give him a hug, Simon angles his head into Nicky’s nape he takes another deep breath, this time not even trying to mute the groan that spills forth, “MMmhm, y’know now that you’re up the night’s still young…” Nicky tilts his head before understanding as Simon’s cock throbs once more into his abdomen, shaking off the sleep Nicky’s own package begins to stir as he leads his partner into their home, “Well now that you mention it~”
Nicky starts disrobing when Simon grabs his hand, some small amount of discomfort hiding in his expression as he asks, “Would you mind if I, um, topped? This time?” Nicky tilts his head before nodding cheerily, “feeling frisky huh?” Nicky performatively poses before seemingly doing some mental math and continuing, “it’s been a minute haha! Let me just hop in the shower real quick and then we’ll have some fun!”
Already feeling like he’s overstepping Simon doesn’t mention his desire for Nicky to not shower. Something feral need within him forces forward an urge to tackle and fuck then and there but he pushes such thoughts down and waits as patiently as he can. Preparing to bottom on such a short notice, Nicky quickly strips and his eyes land upon the talisman hanging from his neck once more. Pursing his lips he goes to take the necklace off, though as his fingers clasp the chain he shivers as it sends a sensitive pang searing through him. Why would he take it off. Feeling immediately more alert and needy, Nicky swiftly hops in the shower to prepare for some fun.
Outside the bathroom his boyfriend taps his foot anxiously, sending a deep, impatient echo through the room. Irritated at the sound he stands and quickly disrobes himself. After getting the cloak off, the room is filled with slight groans of effort as he struggles to get off his shirt. It’s almost stuck to his skin? Probably from sweat he thinks but each time he wrenches it up it only frees about an inch more room. His irritation prevents him from noticing how it decidedly hugs new weight on his chest or cuts into apparently thicker biceps.
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The sound of the shirt straining fills the room and he grinds his teeth as the prospect of being stuck in the top any longer is unbearable. His hands stretch longer and strain shifts to tearing as he rips the tunic off with a grunt. Exposed to the open air is a sweaty body far more impressive than when the man struggled to get ready that morning. Looking at the torn shirt in his hand he blushes as his eyes trail up his forearms and stare at a bicep that’s begging to be flexed. 
Stepping out wearing only a towel and his talisman, Nicky smiles as he stares at Simon appreciating his arms, “Couldn’t have waited for me to put on the show huh?” Simon turns to see his boyfriend drop the towel and he loses control. Any sign of intelligence in his eyes vacates as he manhandles the man onto the bed. For his part Nicky assumes this to be roleplay, almost giggling from delight as the typically meek man ragdolls him onto the bed. Drool leaks from Simon's maw as he grunts and groans, struggling to free the throbbing package still trapped in his shorts.
Being straddled, Nick takes the chance to carefully observe his boyfriend’s body, appreciating the view that he seldom gets. For the life of him he doesn’t understand why Si got so worked up, with arms like that and a chest- or? When did he start working out actually? Nicky frees a hand to touch the man’s powerful torso and Simon shivers, reflexively rutting into him as his cock growing even harder sends the sound of fabric straining through the room. He’s decidedly firmer, heavier. Nicky sees hair begin to grow on the man’s chest and his mind for half a second hears the echoing laughter of a man he wished to forget. Though there’s no time to think as Simon goes for the tried and true method of just ripping his clothes off.
Eyes wide with wonder, Nicky watches as biceps bulge larger with each tug, shoulder span expanding as his hands yank and tear. His mouth falls open as he sees a cock clearly larger than the one that he knows Simon to have. Gulping as he realizes he’s agreed to take this dick that stretches up to his sternum, Nicky blushes and Simon smirks as he leans down to snarl or whisper something in his lover’s ear. 
Nicky feels pre dripping onto his chest as the larger man leans down, his arms land to either side of the man exposing pits dripping with sweat and just before he speaks or growls, the talisman flashes red. Eyes focused on each other neither man sees some shard of light go from the charm into Simon. His eyes roll back and close before he falls down onto Nicky. Immediately concerned for his love, Nicky struggles to shift the man off him and call for help before he hears Simon begin to snore. His body feels like a furnace atop Nicky’s, a cock still erect continues to throb into his stomach and gush pre in between the two of them. He feels patches of hairs thicker than Simon typically carries scratching him. Nicky tries to force the sleeping oaf off him before quickly tuckering himself out.
It was a long day after all. Nicky yawns as he sees the back of the man lying atop him. It’s not right, too wide, too heavy. His ass is not that large his- ughh. With another shove to wake or move Simon, Nicky feels weariness truly overtake him and his scarlet eyes flutter. The sleeping man moves his arms to hug Nicky tight and the seemingly smaller man has no recourse but to give way, his sides tickled by patches of pit hair dripping with sweat. Nick’s head tips forward a few times as he struggles to stay awake though the sound of his lover’s new snores lull him to sleep.
In the morning Nicky wakes to find himself free from Simon’s grasp, though the man’s sweat stains leave a clear outline around him on the bed and his torso remains sticky from pre. His head aches with a hangover though after the faintest wish that it end, so it does. Groaning he gets to his feet and heads off to shower once more, en route he finds a note from Si: “heyyy babe woke up w so much energy!!! gonna go for a run or to the gym idk :) c u soon thooooo<3”  Nicky  rubs sleep from his eyes and reads the short note a few times over, “hmmm. Weird.” Shrugging he goes about his day as usual, cleaning up, brewing coffee, doing the crossword. Something in the back of his mind says he usually does this with Simon, but that can’t be right? He’d never want to do that. His eye twitches as unbeknownst to him, with each step further away his love has truly begun to change from his unintentional intentions into a man who will never feel shame again.
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Simon doesn’t know why he feels so compelled to get up and at ‘em. For years he has given himself ultimatums, scheduled gym sessions, dieted and done his best, but there has not been a moment in his life where he has felt more drive, more purpose than his flight from their shared bed. It’s like he’s a new man with nothing on his mind but getting some meat on his bones. He barely had the wherewithal to leave a note for his lover, as is clear by the lack of eloquence.
Nor is that the only aspect askew from Simon’s typical self. As his anxiety at being perceived shirtless may suggest, the man is always conscious of how he looks. Rarely does a day go by without Simon giving himself a painstaking once over in front of the mirror, be it applying makeup or designing an outfit. To simply throw on a tshirt and leave without even rinsing his face is anathema, and yet after doing just that and throwing on his boyfriend’s sneakers, finding his own far too tight, he’s out the door well before the sun begins to rise. 
His feet fall heavy on the sidewalk as his shabby outfit soon enough finds itself straining. Grimacing at the constriction it becomes clear that these clothes are far too tight and getting tighter with each step it seems. Nevertheless he presses onward until there is stinging pain from his feet struggling against their binds. While he’s been content to ignore or misinterpret the sounds of his own tshirt beginning to fray, as well as the pain that such constriction entails, he doesn’t want to ruin Nicky’s shoes. And so scrambling for somewhere to sit down he hops on a bench and begins to struggle with the laces.
Simon’s toes struggle against frontal fabric while the shoes’ tongues press into laces that simply must be cutting into the tops of his feet. Simon’s mind is clearly slowing down as he takes a few seconds too long to simply watch his feet expand beyond containment before, with a gasp, pain jogs him into action. At first he goes to untie them before he’s unable to recall precisely how to do that. Immediately switching to the task already begun by his growing feet he reaches in and simply tears each shoe in two.
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His arms bulge with the effort involved in splitting them in twain, biceps that never were begin to appear and push his short sleeves to their limit as new muscle presses onto his chest. Looking down at his hands, decidedly more masc, the man can do nothing but observe his new form as it begins to extol an untenable price on his mind. With each new manly aspect so too will the cogs of his mind continue to slow.
Looking at his boyfriend's shredded shoes, Simon is immediately guilty though he releases a contented sigh as his feet flex free from their confines. His newly one track mind is then thrown off-course and his eyes narrow at the feet bare on cold concrete. They were not simply chafing or something reasonable of the sort, they are too big. They’re larger than his shoes and seem to still be growing larger. And wait- Why did he leave the house without wearing socks!? 
Simon shakes his head to try and focus on one question at a time, though before peace comes there is a searing pain from his legs as his changes continue upward. Calves burst from his bony legs while athletic shorts are clearly strained by thighs that any man would kill for. Thick, perhaps barbarous, curls begin to issue forth from any pore exposed as he clutches with his newly thicker hands into muscle still hardening, still pumping larger. 
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Grunting loudly, Simon falls off the bench as ever spreading changes spread towards his glutes. His pert ass hardens and grows to a size that would attract attention no matter what he wears to try and hide it under. His whole lower body cramps with growth as his legs extend, wider feet scratching into dirt as calves and thighs lengthen while his pulse continues to race from the shock of this impossible transformation. Struggling with the new weight of self, his rougher hands pressed into the ground his duller mind is unable to reconcile what is happening to him with reality. The sound of blood rushing through his ears mutes the world around him and at the slightest lapse he simply forgets.
“Why am I on my hands?” Through bleary eyes he stares at hands too wide, fingers longer and thicker. He trails upward and almost scoffs as he sees forearms and biceps not nearly as defined as they should be, after another moment mouth agog he guffaws as he presumes to have put one and one together, “Oh ahuhuh- I must be workin’ out here?” Licking his lips as he is filled with an otherworldly surge of energy, Simon gets started following one of the most common impulses that is to evermore make itself at home in his mind. He starts doing some push ups.
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Immediately do his biceps burn with effort as they put on weight at an impossible rate. Simon grunts with the effort of taking the wheel and commanding his body to be more powerful. His heart pounds in his chest as, just like every piece of fabric before, his shirt quickly gives way outright to the progress of growth. To the strengthening of self. With each dip towards the earth his pecs come closer to touching the cold soil before bouncing as his powerful arms rocket him back upwards with precision. 
Simon continues exercising until his arms burn as numb as his new, slower mind. Not only does muscle continue to pack on with every punch upwards, but his impressive form is just as quickly patterned with burgeoning body hair. Sweat drips down onto a chest rapidly peppered with curls and steams off a back which holds hair slowly rising from his lightly furred ass. Sweaty steam trails upwards from widening shoulders and bulky traps into the cold autumn air as heavy breath mists from behind gnashing teeth. Nowhere does the hair grow thicker than under his powerful arms as a jungle of hair grows outward from his pits and sends distinct trails of sweat down his trunk like biceps and across his hulking pecs.
Body hair and brawn are not the only decidedly improved aspects of the man either. Just as he continues to pack on muscle with each thrust upwards, so too is his crotch pulled closer to the ground with every descent. His briefs struggle against a package rapidly growing beyond any tenable containment. Balls bulge larger to supply his impressive form with the hormones required for the growth he demands of it, pubes cascading upward and outward as they strive to assert that Simon’s masculinity shall never be in question. 
So too does his cock throb and push against the confines of his underwear enough to be plainly visible. Not only from growing erect as his heart races, but from expanding to be the most impressive rod either he or his lover have ever seen. With the slightest glance down to see his new cock, he smirks and shivers as he imagines topping Nicky with that beast. 
This of course sends such a powerful surge of lust through him that the bulging cock immediately bursts free from the briefs outright, leaving him clad in nothing. His cock, now free, drips pre onto the earth as he continues working out a few moments longer in the buff, plain for anyone to see were the streets not thankfully empty. Guffawing to himself after thrusting his new cock into the ground a few times in the process of pushing up, Simon’s new bovine mind eventually realizes he’s fully nude and public and quickly stumbles to his feet. “Oh shit huhuh-” He stands and scratches the back of his head and tries to plan some form of escape, in the process he flexes his bicep and can’t help but smirk as he sees the veins bulging along its impressive length.
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Feeling his still turgid cock bounce with every slight movement, he continues laughing before looking down to see shredded clothes scattered at his colossal feet. Seeing the pile of clothes outgrown, Simon does everything short of drooling as he for the first time takes in his new form. Massive hands trail across padded muscle as the urgency of covering his dick fades from his mind. 
When his sweaty pecs begin to glimmer from the rising sun he is immediately thrown back into awareness of his active criminal behavior. Checking the coast is clear once more, he pauses for a moment wondering what the big deal is about public nudity before being chastised by some internal Nicky. Simon turns back to the bench and laughs dumbly as he sees his gym bag lying discarded.
Pouncing like an animal, he quickly tears into and retrieves shorts that will surely leave nothing to the imagination. Nevertheless he throws them on and grimaces as they tightly hug his ass and package. Seeing shirts thrown to the side he scratches his face and his face quivers as he feels stubble grace it for the first time. He purses his lips just to feel a moustache scratch his nose and absolutely disregards the idea that he needs a shirt. Why would he cover up anything beyond what is necessary. Surely the world would be more than grateful at the chance to see his form he asserts, bouncing his pecs and chuckling as he does so.
Finding himself with nothing to do besides appreciate how built he truly is now, Simon uses his phone as a mirror to inspect every angle and uses whatever sparing space in his mind to keep track of the best ones. The massive man shivers as the sweaty steam rising from him briefly glimmers red, making it clear that Nicky’s will has been enacted on his lover and announcing the fulfillment of his will. Nevermore will he be self-conscious, quite the opposite in fact. As morning commuters begin their grind many offer a passing glance to the by all accounts himbo drooling at his own reflection, and never does one escape without receiving a wink or flex from the man.
When a pair of jocks eye him with jealousy on the way to class he holds back laughter, the idea that not twenty-four hours ago he was just like them, smaller even, is inconceivable to the new man. Though to be fair, much now lies beyond the realm of conceivability for the man. He thinks about offering some tips to the pair though refrains as something needles him far, far in the back of his simple mind. There was something he was supposed to do yeah?
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Furrowing his brow in as deep a concentration as he can muster, Simon’s eyes close and his hands clench at his head as he tries to think. Laundry? Huhuh as if- Meal prep? Then why would he be out here? Simon starts groaning in frustration and tapping his larger, still bare, foot on the sidewalk. Ephemeral ideas he might have latched onto in a life before this one drift past before he gives up and sits down, crossing his arms. The bench creaks under his new weight as he almost petulantly reclines, head back and eyes blank.
Suddenly he jolts up and almost hits himself for not doing the obvious straight away. Obviously Nicky’ll know what to do! His clumsy hands struggle to get his phone from the pocket of his shorts and he smiles at the lock screen, a picture of Nicky being smothered by his massive arms. Simon then squints and bites his tongue in concentration as now even this requires some degree of effort. Quickly enough he dials up his beau and almost vibrates from the excitement of hearing his voice. 
Back at home Nicky is playing a game though squeezes the phone in his headset as he sees Simon calling, “Hey baby? What’s up, early start today huh?” Would that he had a tail to wag, Simon laughs and answers, “ha uhhh, yeah somethin’ like that- uhhhhh. Yo did you uh, know what I was plannin’ on doing this morning?” Nicky tilts his head, for a moment he swears something is off with his boyfriend’s voice. Then his eyes go blank and his vision flickers red before, no it’s always been like that? Nicky swears something about his long hours at the gym over the years made him drop a few octaves but that’s neither here nor there. 
Nicky shakes off this small stupor, “Yeah Si, you said you were going to the gym no?” an eye twitches, “y’know, like usual?” Excitement once more sets fire in Simon’s veins as he nods and laughs at himself for forgetting such a simple routine, “Ahhh what would I do without you babe huhuh!” He kisses his cellphone and winks at a woman walking her dog who was giving him a side-eye. “Well you have fun dude! Gonna go get a MASSIVE pump in!” Nicky wryly grins and rolls his eyes, “you too, you too b, see you later-” With that he gets back to the game, intentionally ignoring the crimson buzzing at the back of his mind as both men set off to tackle the obstacles of the day, totally unaware of the lives they are to unintentionally change evermore. 
Poll Results:
Grow up you asshole: 36.1%
Getting flamed in game Nicky’s clapback  teaches a gamer to be a real man (Bear/Dilf TF) 
Man you always play him: 22%
Well intentioned words bring his gamer friend far closer in mind, body, and spirit to his favorite character- Fictional character TF
Sorry for the backwash: 21.2%
Accidentally sharing a drink causes his himbofication to spread 
Let’s get pumped: 20.7%
Simon finds work as a personal trainer and is far more effective than he has any right to be 
430 notes · View notes
darkmatilda · 1 month ago
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𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐥𝐢𝐠𝐡𝐭 𝐨𝐟𝐟 | 𝐬. 𝐫𝐞𝐢𝐝
𝐬𝐮𝐦𝐦𝐚𝐫𝐲: spencer takes care of you after a serious accident.
𝐜𝐨𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐬/𝐩𝐨𝐭𝐞𝐧𝐢𝐚𝐥 𝐭𝐰: hospital, rehabilitation, neck and brain injury, nud1ty
𝐚/𝐧: this is one of the potential endings of my fanfiction "with the light off" which officialy remains open up to your own interpretation. this version written to comfort all the hearts i've broken <3
𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐝𝐬: 11k
Spencer felt embarrassed by how, just an hour after leaving the apartment, he already wanted to call her.
She had already occupied a near-constant presence in the back of his mind, slipping in like a shadow—elusive and playful—darting between his thoughts, flitting from one corner to another whenever he tried, even briefly, to forget about her. But now? After that night they had spent together?
Spencer knew a lot about obsession. He understood the weight of the word and was acutely aware of its gravity. Yet he couldn’t deny it—he was obsessed with her. Physical contact had always been a sensitive yet profoundly significant subject for him. He didn’t allow many people that close. 
For him, touch was the ultimate proof of closeness and trust. Intimacy bred attachment. This wasn’t about desire in its rawest form—it was something else… though he wasn’t entirely sure what. He couldn’t define the bond they shared.
He felt bored, detached from the world when she wasn’t in it, and the only thing keeping him tethered to some semblance of normality was the thought—the imagining—that at this very moment, they were breathing the same air.
He was starting to think he might be losing his mind.
He held off on calling her precisely to avoid coming across as a lunatic in her eyes. He managed to restrain himself only once he was at work, where the seriousness of his profession demanded it. In a way, though, he felt lighter. Throughout the day, he was buoyed by the thought of their upcoming meeting, the excitement it brought—and the nerves. That mixture of emotions was enough to make the entire team glance at him with curiosity.
Garcia was handing out case files, her hair recently dyed a vibrant shade of red. Rossi, instead of opening his folder like everyone else, was watching Spencer from across the table, leaning on his elbow.
“Did you win the lottery or something?” he asked, so unexpectedly that Spencer glanced around at the others, unsure who the question was meant for.
When he realized the question was directed at him, he swallowed hard. Morgan’s raised eyebrow seemed to challenge him to a duel.
“Not that I know of. Why?”
“Because you’re practically glowing, sweetheart,” Penelope chimed in with a sly smile. “Don’t think you’re getting away without telling me everything later. I’ll get it out of you, don’t you worry. But for now, let’s get started…”
They immersed themselves in the case, but a few hours later, during a brief moment of downtime, he realized he was looking for an excuse to call her. Was a simple desire to ask what she was up to reason enough?
He wondered if she was still at his apartment. He hoped she was. He knew she’d eventually have to leave to prepare for the shift she was starting later that afternoon, but he couldn’t shake the unease gnawing at him about the whole situation with her roommate’s ex-boyfriend.
Realizing he’d been staring at his phone for far too long and that he’d soon need to get back to work, he made a snap decision and called.
But no one answered.
Logically, he reasoned that mornings were probably her time to sleep. Afterward, he tried sending a text message. But by late evening, when he finally returned to his apartment, he was starting to feel genuinely worried.
The question nagged at him: could it have been about the previous night? Maybe he’d done or said something wrong, something that had put her off completely?
Slowly, he walked into the bedroom, pausing in the doorway as his eyes landed on the perfectly made bed. It definitely hadn’t looked like that when he left it.
Then his gaze fell on the slightly ajar safe, and he froze. The combination was incredibly complicated, so he must have left it open when he took out his gun and badge. Besides those items, there was one more thing inside.
He had once again fallen into the trap of keeping Dilaudid close, even though he wasn’t using it. Was it possible she found it, and that’s why she hadn’t reached out?
It wasn’t that he had lied to her about being clean. She had seen how much effort it took for him to talk about it, so she approached the subject with incredible subtlety, never asking directly, but watching him closely, carefully, yet without pressing.
If she had really found it in his safe, she might have felt betrayed. Or maybe she decided she didn’t want to get involved with someone who had such a problem. Perhaps she had seen the whole previous night as one big mistake and then decided to throw him out of her life. Spencer, though it pained him, couldn’t help but feel that he deserved it.
He sat on the bed, crushed by his own thoughts. Something didn’t sit right with the version of events he had imagined. First and foremost, she wasn’t the type of person who would turn him away because of this. Her heart ached to help others; she couldn’t ignore someone else’s troubles. Even if he had hurt her, her immense capacity for understanding would have remained intact. Empathy was imprinted on her, like a deep, unshakable mark.
Driven by a hunch, he reached for his phone to call her again. That’s when he noticed two missed calls from an unknown number, just fifteen minutes ago.
He pressed the phone to his ear, his brow furrowing in confusion as he heard the first sound on the other end… a sob?
The sound went on and on, and Spencer was too confused to utter a single word.
“Who am I talking to?” he finally asked. Unable to stop himself, he stood up. He didn’t even know what was going on or who he was talking to, but he sprang to his feet anyway. His body compelled him, his insides twisting with unpleasant spasms.
It could just as well have been some stupid prank. The problem was, it wasn’t.
“H-hey, it’s J-Jude,” a voice came from the other end. Female, shaky, and choked with sobs so severe that if he didn’t already know her name, he would never have guessed he was speaking to her roommate. He stopped pacing the room. “I-it was me…I called earlier. S-she doesn’t have any…any family, and I didn’t know…I didn’t know who to inform…I can’t handle this on my own…they just took her away again…”
It wasn’t as if the world suddenly came to a halt. It simply became both sharper and blurrier at the same time. Spencer could see that single, bright strand of hair on the pillow with perfect clarity, yet his own legs seemed out of reach. When he looked down, all he saw was darkness stretching below him. Somehow, he was still breathing.
“What are you talking about?” he asked. Later, he couldn’t explain how his voice—those first words—had sounded so composed. “W-who took her… where… and why…?
“I have no fucking idea!” she shouted, followed by a long silence during which Jude took a desperate gasp of air. “I mean, I do, I do know! They just brought her in, but... but suddenly they took her back because there was some kind of…bleeding…”
“...ding?” he blurted out, the first syllable swallowed entirely by his panic.
“No, I don’t want anything to calm me down, I am calm, can’t you tell?” Her voice grew distant, as if she’d pulled the phone away from her mouth. Then it came back, clear and pleading. “Please, come here…”
She hung up. The phone slipped from his hand as if it burned him. In a frenzy, he bent down to grab it, only to drop it again. Finally, he fell to his knees, managing at last to pick it up. As he stood, he felt as though some substance was spreading through his brain—black, toxic, and utterly destructive. Its effects left him barely tethered to reality. He could hear and see, but everything was overlaid with Jude’s words, looping in his mind like printed text on a screen.
The next thirty minutes were a blur.
How could it be logically explained that, in a state of complete detachment from the outside world, he somehow managed to figure out, based on the map of the area imprinted in his memory, which specific hospital she was in? How did his panicked, trembling hands manage to cover that distance by car without causing an accident?
The only thing he knew was that he ended up at the nearest hospital, wearing just a shirt with no outer layer. It was shocking that he even had shoes on. 
He should have been looking for the woman who had called him, demanding every bit of information she had. But somehow, instinctively, his eyes searched for someone else—a familiar face. He prayed it was all some sort of misunderstanding. Maybe he was fooling himself, hoping to spot her among the people passing by. A part of him simply refused to accept the possibility that anything could have happened to her.
Nothing had happened.
She was fine.
Her blue eyes were soaking in the surroundings, their gaze carrying that faint sparkle that always appeared at night. Maybe there was even a smile on her lips. He couldn’t—wouldn’t—allow himself to imagine what might have happened to her. It felt as though the universe itself should be ashamed for ever entertaining the thought of harming her.
"Are you family?" the man at reception asked. Spencer nodded. "I'm sorry, but I can't provide you with any information,"
"Just tell me, is she alive?"
"I can't…"
"Just fucking tell me…"
"They’re operating on her right now," a voice spoke from behind him. Spencer turned and blinked. Only then did he realize he was in a hospital. Before, he’d only had a goal—an urgent need to get there. The surroundings were just beginning to take shape in his mind. He had never seen this woman before, but he guessed it had to be Jude. Her face was swollen from crying, but she seemed less shaken than during their call. She had probably accepted the sedatives. "Again. First, they spent almost four hours working on her neck… they said she was stable, asleep, but then suddenly there was that bleeding… I watched them take her out of the room right in front of me…"
“Did you see her?”
Unexpectedly, she hid her face in her hands.
“I didn’t know who to call. She mentioned you a few times, and I had your number, and I didn’t know what to do…” she began explaining chaotically, as if it mattered at all. “It’s my fault, you know, all of this is my fucking fault…”
They were standing right in front of the receptionist, blocking his access to others who needed help. Spencer snapped back to the moment, pulling her a few steps aside.
“W-what did you say? That they operated on her for four hours?”
“Yes, the first time…”
So, she had been there for at least four hours. Longer, considering the time needed after surgery before visiting a patient. Pain spread across his chest. While he was wondering why she hadn’t answered his calls, coming to various conclusions, she had been fighting for her life?
He... had been at work, moving around, talking to others, living, while all of this was happening? He felt as if... as if he had betrayed her. It was absurd, even he knew that. Despite the state he was in—tragic, to be precise—he understood just how absurd that thought was. But he couldn’t stop the guilt and shame that washed over him every time he tried to imagine her on the operating table while he had been completely unaware of her condition.
“I need to sit down," Jude muttered, and after a moment, they found themselves on narrow chairs lined along the hospital walls. Spencer barely managed to force his knees to bend, his body to settle into the seat.
He was only beginning to adjust to the foreign gravity that was pressing down on him.
In his head, there was only one thought, one resolution, one desire. The only thing that could save him from losing his mind in this waiting room.
"I need to see her."
"We have to wait," Jude replied, pressing her hand to her forehead. More tears appeared in her eyes. She wasn’t just terrified, she was completely falling apart. "We... we once gave each other permission to access information about our health. You know, in case of an accident. The doctors told me everything. A neck sprain. A concussion. Two broken ribs and a broken forearm." Although her speech had been unclear earlier, when she listed the injuries, she sounded like a movie announcer.
Spencer quickly realized that these words must have been echoing in her head since they were first told to her. The same thing had been happening to him. Each word was like a blow delivered with full force, and his extensive medical knowledge wasn’t helping him avoid panic. He was too aware of the danger and too aware of the suffering her poor body must have endured.
They both squeezed their eyes shut tightly. Spencer felt as though his temples might explode. Waiting. Was there anything worse in the world than waiting? Being stuck in ignorance, teetering between uncertainty, relief, and utter despair? Feeling all of it at once?
"How did this even happen?" he asked the woman sitting next to him.
He was sure he already knew the answer to that question. She didn’t even need to say it. It was enough to see how she dropped her gaze, heavy with pain, and how tightly her jaw clenched.
“She... fell down the stairs.”
Spencer wanted to scoff at the understatement. The real version of events couldn’t pass Jude’s lips, but in some way, he considered that a blessing. If Jude had openly admitted that she had been pushed, he might have crumbled under the weight of the fury flooding him. But for now, his anger didn’t matter. Only the passing time did.
He felt as if he hadn’t taken a single breath since leaving his apartment. Leaning his head back in his seat, he endured what felt like two whole days, then glanced at his watch only to realize that exactly forty-seven seconds had passed.
Time—a relative concept. In physics and in human perception. Einstein had proven it, and so had that particular moment.
He started to fear that he might never leave the waiting room. Memories and emotions began to blur together. He formed a theory: that he had been trapped there for quite some time—weeks, perhaps. Back when another loved one had been on the operating table, and he’d been losing his mind in much the same way.
Could it be that, under the strain of this torturous waiting, he’d lost his sanity? That his brain, desperate for relief, had simply imagined everything that followed? The trip to the library that night, finding himself at her door, the string lights on the Christmas tree, the Venus flytrap, the bar, opening the door that night and seeing her on the stairwell—at once flushed from a night spent at the club and chilled from the December air?
And now that illusion had simply shattered, like a fragment of broken glass. He was back in the waiting room again, waiting, hurting too much—and yet feeling as though he had no right to. His pain was nothing compared to what she was going through. He should be doing something, anything, to make himself useful, to not succumb to the weight of his own helplessness.
When the doctor finally approached them, Spencer almost knocked over his chair in his haste to stand. The doctor, however, focused solely on Jude as he delivered the update, leaving Spencer questioning whether he even existed.
“We managed to stop the bleeding. That’s the good news,” he began, his dark eyes unreadable—at once cool and concerned, with the practiced composure characteristic of people in his profession.
“Thank God,” Jude whispered, rubbing her chest as if trying to calm the frantic beating of her heart.
Spencer, on the other hand, felt no relief. Not even a sliver.
"‘That’s good news,’" he repeated the doctor’s words, drawing the man’s gaze to him. ‘But… but is there something bad?’
That brief moment before the doctor answered felt longer than nearly the past two hours of waiting.
“Due to suspected brain swelling, we had to induce a coma.’
“What?’ Jude mouthed silently. “How… how could she be in a coma? Why? Was that necessary?’
“They needed to reduce the intracranial pressure,’ Spencer replied, the words spilling from his mouth without him even realizing he was speaking. ‘The coma prevents further damage and minimizes the brain’s oxygen consumption. But will she… how long will she…?’
“Only for a few days,’ the doctor assured him, understanding the question he couldn’t quite form. “As long as there are no further complications or additional bleeding. But I can reassure you for now: there’s no indication of that. Her condition seems stable. She was… incredibly lucky. It was a serious accident—a miracle, a sheer miracle—that she didn’t break her spine.’"
For a moment, he couldn’t utter a single word, his throat still tight, and the relief never came. He knew he wouldn’t feel it until he saw her, fully conscious and awake. Until that happened, he would grimace every time he heard the word miracle. 
"When will I be able to see her?" he asked, surprisingly calm and composed. The question was so important to him that his voice didn’t tremble even once. In fact, it was the only thing that mattered right now.
"You’ll need to wait a few hours before visiting. We have to make sure there’s no risk of a sudden deterioration in her condition. Also, only authorized individuals can visit her."
The last part of the doctor’s statement felt almost like a slap in the face.
"How many hours?" he pressed, impatience creeping into his voice. "Two? Four? Six?"
"Please, calm down," the doctor asked, making a gesture with his hand.
“Eight?”
His voice grew increasingly sharp, desperately demanding an answer. The doctor opened his mouth to respond, but Jude interrupted with a question.
"As an authorized person, can I, on behalf of the patient, allow him to visit?" she asked, catching Spencer’s gaze for a brief moment before quickly turning away. "She would want this, I know it."
The doctor shook his head in refusal, providing them with a few more details about the surgery before turning to leave. Spencer watched him leave, something in him wavering between a sigh and a snort. So they wouldn’t even let him visit her? He understood the hospital procedures and rules perfectly well, but when it came to his own case, he hated them with all his heart. They wouldn’t allow him to see someone who meant so much to him, simply because they weren’t bound by blood or a ring on his finger. A ring on his finger… maybe he should lie and say they were engaged?  Although, would it really make any difference in the eyes of the hospital staff?
Before the loose fragments in his mind began to form a plan, he noticed that Jude was staring at him. She had sat down again, pressing her back tightly against the chair's backrest. She hadn’t cried for a while now; a certain relief had settled on her face when she heard the surgery had been successful, but then the old devastation returned, stronger than ever before.
"I won’t be able to visit her," she said, her voice hollow. "Not even while she’s unconscious. And when she wakes up, look her in the eyes. Tell me, how could I do that after everything? After all of this was my fault?"
Spencer turned away and walked off.
He knew that if he didn’t, something inside him would break. He couldn’t stop the anger he felt toward Jude. From what he knew, she had repeatedly refused to report her ex-boyfriend to the police, perhaps more or less aware of the danger he posed. She had the right to do so, theoretically. But that didn’t change the fact that someone else had suffered because of her foolish decision.
In his eyes she deserved the guilt she felt.
Not knowing what to do with himself, he found a place far from her, far from anyone, where he spent the next few hours, hardly moving. Sometimes he observed the relatives of other patients in the hospital, also broken, but he had some selfish feeling that even they wouldn’t understand what he felt. He placed himself on some distant, elite orbit of suffering and felt almost embarrassed by it. 
Pain always makes sure that a person feels as lonely and misunderstood as possible in it. That is when it has the most power over them.
He kept away from the windows, the darkness outside, slowly losing its intensity, putting him into a state of shock and contemplation. Maybe time was a relative concept, but that didn’t change the fact that it existed. Somewhere far away, there was light beyond this waiting room.
For some time now, he had been occupied with a certain task. He was aware of the hours passing and how, with them, his desperation grew. He felt he would go mad if he didn’t see her. The designated time during which the patient should be ensured complete rest after surgery had ended, yet he knew they wouldn’t let him in to see her. But he had a brain for a reason, right?"
He found the room where everything that mattered to him at that moment was. A young doctor was just leaving.
"Excuse me, ma'am,” he approached her politely, trying to appear calm, though his appearance and trembling hands clearly suggested otherwise. “I need to visit this patient.”
“Are you a relative?”
“No, actually…” He knew this was a desperate move and resorting to a lie, but he didn’t care. What was morality in his situation? Just a word. He reached for the badge he had with him and cleared his throat. “I’m with the FBI. I’ve been assigned to see this particular patient; it’s a matter that cannot be delayed."
Believe it or not, but people often lost their minds at the mere mention of the FBI. Spencer suspected that such a young doctor might have some gaps in experience and not know what procedures were in place in such a situation.
The surprised woman took a half step back.
“But she’s in a coma…” she said uncertainly, turning toward the room. “Are you sure it’s this patient?”
“Absolutely. And as I said, there’s no time to waste.”
He didn’t put his badge away, still holding it raised, with a serious expression on his face, as if he were interrogating someone. It was clear she was torn with doubt, but fortunately for him, she decided to give in without consulting the decision.
Spencer almost ran into the room, unable to hold back his impatience any longer. At first, he felt as if in a dream, one where you achieve your greatest goal. However, it quickly turned into a nightmare, all because of what he saw.
Whatever he had imagined, he was not prepared for this sight. 
Especially because before he even noticed her face, the face he was so desperate to see, he first noticed everything else surrounding it. The hospital equipment, the machines and devices monitoring her vital signs. The wide orthopedic collar tight around her neck. The sterile whiteness of it all, obscuring her and making her almost disappear against its backdrop. It wasn’t until he approached the bed, his legs weak and unsteady, that he started to look at her, but again, not specifically at her, but at the injuries. The sight of swollen temples, the sunken eyes, pale and dry lips, skin like a sheet of paper. Every injury on her body caused him unimaginable pain, so intense it almost stopped him from breathing. He felt so much anger and injustice that she had to go through this that he almost wanted to fall to his knees and apologize to her, beg for forgiveness. For what? He couldn’t decide. It wasn’t a need driven by logic, it was something deep inside him.
And that’s what he did, even though there was a place beside the bed where he could sit. He slowly knelt down, his hands touching the edge of the bed, but not her body. After all, he wasn’t about to risk causing her any pain due to his lack of control. But he had such an overwhelming desire to take her hand, the one whose fingers shyly peeked out from under the cast.
"I should have gone with you," he said, after about five minutes spent in complete silence, undisturbed even by his breath, which he was holding back. "I should have. Walked you to the door and made sure you got inside safely. I’m sorry…"
He felt that with his pitiful apologies, he was disturbing her peace. She needed it to fully rest. So, he fell silent again, alternating between looking at her with furrowed brows in tender concern and resting his forehead against the edge of the bed whenever the sight became too painful. While before, time seemed to crawl at the slowest possible pace, now it was racing forward wildly.
In his perception, barely a minute had passed when someone’s presence appeared behind him. He turned over his shoulder, noticing the young nurse who had let him in, and it took him a long time before he even realized it. After all, he had lied to her, saying it was some professional matter, yet she had found him kneeling by the hospital bed.
He quickly got to his feet, nervously rubbing his face.
“For the patient’s well-being, no visits should last longer than twenty minutes,” the woman said surprisingly gently, leaning slightly against the door with her shoulder. An unidentified expression lingered in her eyes, making them seem...warm.
He didn’t answer, just nodded. He no longer felt the need to play that little charade that had helped him get inside. He allowed himself one last long moment, looking at her face, peaceful in sleep. He passed the doctor in the doorway, feeling her eyes turn to him, and he did the same, out of curiosity. She smiled, sadly and with compassion.
"This had nothing to do with any FBI assignment, right?”
Her understanding seemed almost touching. However, Spencer, caught in the moment, quickly withdrew, once again making his way down the hospital corridors, now completely unsure of what to do with himself. He leaned against one of the walls, slowly feeling the fatigue from the entire night spent waiting to see her. He found his phone in his pocket, realized it was already morning, and that… Hotch had called him.
It was a quick collision with the outside world. He called back, as nothing else came to mind that he could focus on.
"Reid," the serious voice of his boss came through on the other end. "Why aren’t you at work, and why aren’t you answering?"
He needed to take a breath before he could respond.
"Sorry, Hotch," he said, trying not to sound weak, but that’s exactly how he sounded. Weak, a little pitiful, and on the verge of exhaustion. "Something... something really important happened, and... I... I won’t be able to come in today..."
Spencer realized he had no idea how to explain himself in this situation.
"I can’t remember the last day you were even late. What happened?" He didn’t answer. "Where are you?" Silence. "Spencer."
"It’s... a personal matter."
There was a brief silence from his boss, and Spencer could almost imagine how he furrowed his dark brows in confusion.
"I understand." His voice was tense, but not with disapproval, which surprised Spencer. More with... concern. Had he managed to read the seriousness of the situation just from his voice? Probably, after all, he was the best profiler Spencer knew. "You’ll need to explain later, but for now... take care of yourself. Do you need any help?”
He assured him insincerely that everything was fine and found an empty chair to sit in, hunched over. A strong pressure formed in his head, amplified by the helplessness and uncertainty about what he should do next. She was in a coma, and according to the doctor, she would be in it for the next few days. And what was he supposed to do during that time? He felt that physically, he could spend another hundred hours on that specific chair. Occasionally stretching his legs. It was his plan, one that seemed more real with every passing minute. At least, until a figure cast its shadow over him.
"Reid," a familiar voice spoke.
He looked up, surprised, at Morgan. His mouth was slightly open in confusion, his forehead deeply furrowed.
"What are you doing here?"
"How... how did you know where I was?" That was the first thing that came to his mind.
"Penelope. How she knew, I have no idea, but I’m starting to suspect that her joke about having us all chipped wasn’t really a joke. But anyway, what’s going on? Hotch told me you called, and you sounded... unsettling."
His friend was watching him closely. His wrinkled clothes, his tired face.
"So... Hotch sent you to find me?"
"Reid, you’re our friend. Did you really think we wouldn’t be worried about you?"
Spencer lowered his head, listening to his words. Derek was silent for a moment, his hands resting on his hips, his tense face scanning the surroundings. After a while, he focused his gaze back on him.
"Who is the person you’re visiting?"
He hesitated before answering, not because he didn’t want to share the information, but because he wasn’t sure how to refer to her. What should he call her? After all, it wasn’t like they were in an official relationship, and the word friend seemed to leave something unsaid.
“Someone... someone very important to me. She had an accident. She has... a cervical spine injury, and the doctors, suspecting brain swelling, decided to put her into a coma for a while.”
Morgan's eyes widened.
“Damn, Reid. I’m so... I’m so sorry.”
He sat down on the empty chair beside him, his face still showing shock. Exhausted, Spencer simply rested his head on his knees, no longer able to keep his posture straight. He felt drained, yet at the same time, he couldn’t bring himself to leave—couldn’t leave her…
Morgan’s hand fell onto his back, and finally, then sighed.
“Come here, man.”
With a firm pull, he drew him into an embrace.
Spencer found it hard to admit, even to himself, how much he needed this. No words left their mouths for a long while; only that brotherly, supportive embrace remained between them.
“Have you seen her?” Morgan asked after a while.
He confirmed, but didn’t reveal the circumstances. His friend paused for a moment, as if he wanted to say something but hesitated.
“Okay, listen to me. You need to get back to yourself.”
Spencer scoffed and shook his head, ready to argue.
“Let me finish. I know you don’t want to leave her right now, but with all due respect, you look like death. You need to eat and get some sleep.”
“I can’t,” Spencer replied firmly.
“You’re going to collapse soon. You said she’ll be in a coma for a few days. You won’t make it sitting here, think realistically. No one’s asking you to go back to work, you just need to rest.” He looked at him seriously, knowing how hard it would be to convince him. Finally, he sighed once more. “Do it for her, alright? Do you really think she’d want you to wear yourself out like this?”
He had no ready answer for that. Well, he did, but it sounded like no, she wouldn’t want that.
“I’ll take you home. For God’s sake, you came here without even a coat?”
It's a strange feeling to let someone take care of you. Completely. Derek not only drove him to his apartment but also came inside with him. There was no emotional discussion between them, which he found to be a relief. Silent support, he thought.
His relationship with the other team members had been tested after Emily's death—or at least, that's what he had thought up until now. He had begun isolating himself, not wanting to intrude on their grief or burden them with his own problems. But in reality—something he hadn’t seen until now—it had been the opposite. It strengthened their bond.
The next few days revolved mainly around hospital visits. Somehow, he had managed to gain visiting rights, and the time spent by her side filled him with a certain sense of calm. He could see how stable her vital signs were, and he clung to the doctors’ reassurances that she would regain consciousness in just a few days.
He once read a series of articles and interviews with people who had been in comas. Their accounts sometimes contradicted medical facts and often included embellishments, but a significant number of them mentioned remembering the voices of loved ones and certain sounds.
He didn’t want her to remember only the sounds of medical equipment from this period. But he also wasn’t sure what he could talk to her about. Would she want to hear about the overly salted carbonara that Garcia had forced an entire pot of on him? Or about the abstract mural being painted across from his apartment—something he was sure she would have liked?
In the end, he decided to read to her, though choosing what to read proved challenging. Sleeping Beauty seemed too ironic, even though she would probably laugh about it later. She had once told him Girl, Interrupted was her favorite book, but its hospital setting made him suspect she might prefer something that let her escape this place, even if only in her imagination. The Silence of the Lambs referenced one of their past conversations, but if a doctor overheard him reading it to her, he would surely be banned from visiting altogether.
“All right,” he began one day, sitting down in the chair by her bed. “I know you’re not a big fan of fantasy. And yes, you’ll have every right to call me out on this when you wake up. But still, I hope you’ll like it.”
Arabian Nights was a collection of tales and stories originating from the Middle East, India, and Persia. Somehow, he assumed that the mysterious, often nocturnal atmosphere might resonate with her, even soothe her. After all, night had always been her favorite time of day—the backdrop to so much of her life.
That day, as he was about to leave, he leaned slightly over her bed, lowering his voice to a whisper.
"Tomorrow, I'll read you a romance, how does that sound? But I’ll have to go to the bookstore because, despite your beliefs, I don’t have any in my collection. I wish I’d had more time to get to know your reading preferences better."
During none of his previous visits had he touched her, afraid it might disturb her peace in some negative way. Besides... in the state she was in, she looked so fragile and delicate that he feared even the slightest touch could hurt her. But that time, he simply couldn’t hold back. After a long internal struggle, he placed a very brief kiss on her forehead.
Spencer couldn’t keep his promise. While he did buy a romance novel recommended to him with enthusiasm by a young bookstore clerk, he never had the chance to read it to her.
The next day, he received a message. 
She had woken up. 
*
You didn’t remember much.
Only fragmented scraps. The memories began with a brief moment of complete physical helplessness, a terrible pain in your neck, and a series of flashing lights mingling with raised voices—even shouting. Then came silence, vile and terrifying.
But that wasn’t the end. Something came after the silence.
Softly spoken stories. For some reason, they were comforting. In your mind, only a few blurred images remained—no clear events or words. What you remembered most was that soothing, calm voice. It felt like an embrace, like warm bedding, the first rays of cosmic light piercing through clouds, or the gentle chill of evening air.
It was… beautiful. But it couldn’t last forever. After an indeterminate amount of time, your body decided to reject that comfort and tried to open its eyes. It was an excruciating effort. You sighed with the strain. The first colors and surreal shapes began to appear before you. Slowly, you started to become aware of your existence, yet at the same time, you felt suspended somewhere outside your body and mind—alone and terrified.
The sensations were both faint and overwhelmingly intense, making you want to hide, to somehow cut yourself off from them. Yet you were equally afraid to close your eyes again. You muttered things that made no sense. You remained in this panicked state until two tiny brown points hovered above you, widening with concern. Only then were you able to calm down—at least enough to stop straining your body with attempts to move. Attempts, because your body seemed entirely unwilling to follow your commands.
The fear buried itself deep within you, drilling into your chest. At first, it suffocated you, but eventually, it began to weaken and fade.
This was how the first hours after waking from the coma unfolded.
Weakness, disorientation, mumbling, pain, discomfort, and light sensitivity.
It took a long time before you regained awareness of being in a hospital. Even more time passed before you remembered why. And then, your own condition and state.
You were so incredibly weak that it filled you with disgust, terrified by how much effort even the smallest movement required—like the twitch of a finger or the blink of an eye. Frustrated by it all, you cried, and he cried too. But his tears were born of relief and joy.
Those two specific emotions reached you the latest—only after they transferred you to a different ward, and your thoughts began to clear. Relief and joy. Hand in hand with fear and anxiety. 
It felt so unreal, yet it was real—real like nothing else, and it held you tightly, exactly the way you needed it to.
*
Spencer was aware that her awakening was just another step in a very long journey.
His medical knowledge, modestly speaking, was fairly extensive, and he understood the gravity of the injuries she had sustained. Their first meeting after she had opened her eyes for the first time was nothing like a scene from a movie. She was confused, still drowsy, and as she slowly started to comprehend everything, she was primarily terrified. Her body, after the time spent in the coma, though brief, was extremely weak, and every little movement exhausted her as though she had just run a marathon.
The fear on her face pierced his chest.
He had the impression that none of the words he spoke, almost whispered in an attempt to calm her, were having any effect.
"I... I can't move," she stammered as one of the first things she said. Her eyes intensely focused on his face, searching for safety in it, and he feared he wouldn't be able to provide it for her.
"It's just temporary," he reassured her gently, leaning over her bed and trying to smile, but it came out uncertain, he was too worried about her condition. "The doctors say so, and that's the truth. Your body is just very weak right now."
"Will... will it be like this forever?"
"No, no, it will pass. I promise, it will pass," he nodded fervently. She hesitated and took a breath, as though discovering an entirely new action. But as soon as she did, out of fear, it became fast and irregular. He was terrified that his touch might cause her pain, but he didn't know what else he could do to help her. Gently, as gently as he could, he placed his hand on her cheek, barely grazing it with his thumb. "You'll feel better soon. Really, it won’t be long now. For now... just don’t overexert yourself, please, breathe."
At first, she flinched. He wanted to withdraw his hand as quickly as possible, but then he felt her press her face against it, almost nuzzling into it. A shy tear danced in one of her eyes, barely noticeable.
"It’s good to see you," she said after a brief silence, a soft sigh escaping her lips—almost like a laugh, though it didn’t quite make it. Her breath was still shallow and uneven, but with each passing moment, it seemed to steady as he held her close.
And in that moment, seeing her like that, feeling her presence so close, a smile spread across his face—a smile so genuine, so long-awaited—and with it came the tears he’d been holding back for what felt like forever.
"I feel the same," he whispered, his voice thick with emotion. "You have no idea how much."
*
The orthopedic collar pissed you off like nothing else.
It wasn’t even the discomfort that bothered you, it was just... the collar was such a painful reminder of your condition, a testament to what you had been through. And you were supposed to wear it for another six to eight weeks.
Two weeks after waking from the coma, preparations for leaving the hospital were beginning. The risk of brain swelling had subsided, the injuries were healing, and the concussion still made its presence known, but the pain was no longer as intense. You could even have a normal conversation, which you seized almost immediately, striking up a chat with the teenage girl in the bed next to you, her sad expression tugging at your heart.
Few people visited you; you preferred that the two most important ones could spend as much time with you as possible, rather than inviting coworkers or acquaintances you hadn’t spoken to in months. The two most important people.
Spencer had been with you since the moment you woke up, and as the doctor confessed to you with a small smile, he had also stayed by your side while you were in a coma. You were in shock. Not because he had done it—it made perfect sense, given his caring nature. The shock came from the simple fact that one person could care so deeply about another, about you.
It didn’t take long for you to realize that the moments when he visited you became your favorite part of the entire day. And not just because they revolved around checking your condition, tests, and the first, incredibly light rehabilitation exercises. You simply found yourself waiting for the moment he would appear in that doorway again, holding his coat in hand, smiling.
"Hello, handsome stranger," you greeted him one day, the first day you were starting to feel better.
 Spencer stopped at the sound of that term, tilting his head with an even wider smile.
 "How else did I used to call you?" you mused aloud. "Ah, I used to call you Mr. Mysterious. But I suppose that's no longer fitting, you smile too much to seem mysterious."
 "Because I have a reason," he replied, stopping beside your bed and glancing at the flowers placed there, the ones that had greeted you when you woke up that day. "But in that case, 'Handsome stranger' doesn’t fit either, since you know me now."
"But you are handsome. Half of it fits, so I have the right to call you that. Who... who sent me these flowers?"
"Better question would be, who didn’t send you those?" he muttered, referring to their large number. You could only admire them—the beautiful, colorful arrangements—but you hadn’t had the chance to read the notes and messages attached. Spencer glanced at one of them, his smile fading, though not in a bad way... somehow, the expression that appeared on his face was even more pleasing than his smile. "This... this one’s from my team."
You were simply speechless.
 "They... they even know I exist?"
 "Of course they do, how could they not?" Spencer paused for a moment, looking at you thoughtfully. "They... they were with me the whole time you were in a coma. They helped me keep my head together."
 "Don’t exaggerate," you tried to dispel the sudden serious mood. You didn’t want to delude yourself into thinking he had been that worried about you during that time. 
 "It’s not an exaggeration," he replied briefly and seriously, his face almost motionless.
For a moment, you fell silent, your hands resting on the blanket in front of you.
 "Sorry, Spencer. I just realized I’ve never thanked you for this..."
"What?" he asked, surprised, his brows furrowing. "This isn’t something you have to thank me for..."
"But I feel like I have to. This... this isn’t some small, silly favor. You really did so much for me... I still don’t fully understand why..."
 "You don’t understand why?"
"Yeah," you sighed uncertainly, not sure how to put it into words. "Don’t get me wrong... I’m so grateful to you, it’s just... look at it this way. We didn’t know each other that long, we saw each other rarely. We slept together once. It’s not like you were…obligated to help me."
"I didn’t have to be obligated to do it," he said after a moment of hesitation, circling your bed and sitting on the edge, just barely touching it. "And I didn’t have to know you for years. I just wanted to do it because of how much I cared about you. And if that explanation doesn’t convince you... then..." He swallowed hard. "Remember, you were there for me during one of the worst moments of my life."
“It’s not the same...”
 “Oh, but it is. For me, it is. But I don’t want you to think that I was there for you because I felt like I owed you something. Or that I had to... I don’t know... repay you in some way. That’s not it at all.”
You didn’t answer, something tight gripped your throat. You just tilted your head, overwhelmed with emotion, speechless. The only thing you truly wanted to do was stretch out your arms and drape them around his neck, resting your chin on his shoulder. Spencer sighed, surprised and tense. It wasn’t until a brief moment passed that his hands gently touched your back.
“How much longer are you going to act like I’m made of glass?” you asked.
You knew his caution was justified, but Jesus. You just really wanted to hug him properly.
“Probably forever,” he replied, to which you rolled your eyes.
He was the one to break the hug, but in compensation, he quickly kissed the top of your head. You leaned back against the bed, feeling a pleasant sensation in your stomach. Spencer returned to the flowers to tell you who had sent them all.
“So these are from my team,” he picked up the lost thread, pointing to the arrangement of white and pink carnations. He chuckled. “And I’m pretty sure Penelope picked them out, not just because her name is listed first. White represents perseverance and strength. Pink stands for admiration and respect.”
“That’s really thoughtful. And beautiful. I’ll have to thank them. And these tulips?”
Spencer took the note attached to the mentioned flowers between his fingers.
“From... Jerry.”
“What? My husband sent me flowers?”
 “What?” He jerked his head up in surprise.
You laughed so hard at the look on his face that it made you wince in your ribs.
 “I’m fucking kidding, you fool,” you replied, clutching your side with a groan. “Jerry is the librarian. You should know him. He once asked me what flowers he should buy for his wife, and I suggested yellow tulips. By the way, it's so nice of him”.
You said it affectionately, but it sounded incredibly weak. Along with the pain in your ribs, a headache joined in, and suddenly all the energy you'd had earlier evaporated.
“What's happening? Should I call a doctor?”
“No,” you shook your head in refusal. “I just need to lie down for a moment. Come here.”
Spencer followed your request and sat beside your bed, his body a little stiff, as if in guilt.
"I'm sorry I made you laugh."
"That's probably the strangest thing you could apologize for," you muttered, lying down in the position that was best for your neck, one you almost hated as much as the orthopedic collar. "Well, I guess I could come up with something stranger. Sorry I left that million dollars in your nightstand. It won't happen again."
"I'm not sure if this kind of chatter is particularly good for your condition."
"It helps me mentally, and that's what matters most. Besides, stop complaining."
"How could I possibly dare?"
He fell silent, simply watching you with quiet concern. You closed your eyes for a moment, unsure if you might accidentally drift off. After spending a week in a coma, your sleep routine had become completely erratic. You slept through the nights, mostly because there was little else to do, and you didn’t want to disturb the other patients in the ward. During the day, Spencer would visit, and you wanted to be as rested as possible when he was around.
When he wasn’t there, you sometimes napped during the day as well. According to the doctors, it was one of the best things you could do for your recovery—sleep and rest as much as your body needed.
"Is something bothering you?" he asked.
You hesitated for a long moment, because yes, something was weighing heavily on your mind. Had he guessed, or had he read it on your face?
“It’s just…” you began with a sigh. “You know Jude barely visits me? I mean, she shows up every day, but… she’s so tense and distant when she’s here. She doesn’t say much, and she won’t look me in the eyes.”
"She’s blaming herself," Spencer said softly.
“God, that’s so stupid,” you muttered.
You had a strange relationship with the accident. You thought about it as little as possible, keeping it at arm’s length. You knew Richard had been arrested, but you didn’t want to know the details of his sentencing. In no way did you see any of it as Jude’s fault, and it hurt you deeply to think that she did.
You spent a quiet moment together before Spencer leaned over you again, intending to kiss your forehead.
“I’m sorry, but I’ll have to go now,” he said, to which you nodded in understanding.
But then you shifted your head, pulling back just enough to stop him from brushing his lips against your forehead. He looked at you, puzzled, since you’d never minded it before.
This time, though, you wanted him to kiss you on the lips.
He kissed you slowly. You had almost forgotten how he tasted.
After that, you didn’t bother opening your eyes again. You let yourself imagine that he wasn’t leaving at all, and with that comforting thought, you drifted off to sleep.
*
Spencer had felt strange since the morning.
 Energized and excited. In the absolute best possible way.
That day, he could finally take her home. Well, to his apartment. She needed someone to take care of her, and he felt honored to be that person.
The day before, he had made a very important, yet difficult decision. He invited JJ over and confessed everything to her—about the past few weeks and his struggles with relapsing into addiction. He needed to rid himself of that burden. Besides, he had promised himself that as long as she was living with him, not even the smallest dose of Dilaudid would find its way inside. Never again.
In his worst moments, he imagined that his friend would react with disgust—pure, painful disgust—and push him away. Instead, her eyes filled with something strange the moment he began to speak about how he had felt after Emily's death. Over and over, she whispered apologies, as though she were the one responsible for it.
He still missed Emily, of course, and he knew he would always miss her. That was just the way of things—people left, and it was up to you to decide whether you would remember them with heartbreaking despair or with a wistful sigh. In fact, these were merely two ends of the same spectrum, and it was very easy to get stuck at the beginning, unable to move forward.
She was surprisingly quiet in the car and seemed depressed. Actually, it was hard not to blame her. She had spent a long time in the hospital, gotten used to that routine, and the change made her feel lost. Sitting in the passenger seat, she kept her gaze fixed ahead, but not on the road. She couldn’t see where they were headed, which made it difficult for Spencer to tell her something… at least important.
 When they stopped, she furrowed her brow in surprise.
 “Why are we here?”
They were parked under his apartment, and she had been under the impression they were heading to her place.
 “Sorry, I should’ve told you earlier, I really apologize,” Spencer blurted out in one breath, chaotically. “I absolutely realize that this is like putting you in a situation you didn’t expect, but… but when you were in the hospital, Jude found herself a new roommate. She didn’t really know how to tell you, but she had to do it because she couldn’t afford the rent on her own.”
For a long moment, she stared at him in silence, her face a mixture of shock, followed by understanding. She took a deep breath.
 “Okay,” she muttered. “I understand her, I just… I don’t understand why she didn’t tell me this herself.”
Their relationship still remained deeply complicated, put to the test by guilt. Spencer couldn’t say much about it. It was something between the two of them, and he hardly knew Jude at all.
 “I’m also sorry for asking you this so late,” he continued after a moment. “But… you can’t live alone, you know that. Someone… someone needs to be with you over the next few weeks and… I’m willing to be that person.”
Her lips remained slightly parted for a moment.
“You want… no, wait, you want me to move in with you?” It was clearly a rhetorical question, because before he could answer, she started shaking her head. “Spencer, I can’t. I can’t be that burden for you.”
“A burden? You’re not…”
“But I will be. In the next few weeks, I definitely will be.”
He took his hands off the steering wheel, placing them loosely on his knees.
“Can you… can you look at me for a moment?” he asked.
It took a moment before she hesitantly met his gaze. Her eyes were filled with embarrassed tears, tears full of unjust shame. Seeing this, pain spread through his chest.
“If the accident hadn’t happened, would you want to live with me?”
 Her lips remained pressed together, and she sighed.
 “It’s a big decision. Aside from the fact that if it weren’t for the accident, I wouldn’t even have to consider this option…”
“I just want to know if you would want to. Don’t think of it as an option, just as… a completely normal, life decision. Do you think you’d be able to handle having me around every day?”
She couldn’t help it, and her lips curled into a slight smile.
“We could try,” she finally replied.
Spencer straightened his arms.
“In that case, let’s go inside.”
 “No, wait, it’s not that simple! My opinion shouldn’t matter; it’s you who needs to think about whether you want this…”
 “I do.”
She snorted, resigned, not knowing what else to say.
“I can’t even tie my own shoes,” she tried one last time.
“I’ll gladly do it for you. What’s more, I know all kinds of knots. Simple, sailor’s, Chinese…”
“Spencer Reid, you’re impossible.”
For the rest of the day, she tried every possible way to talk him out of his decision. But when she finally accepted it, she struggled to accept his help with tasks she couldn’t do on her own.
 It wasn’t until later that he realized how much she had been pretending in the hospital. He had only seen her for a fraction of her day, and she seemed so positive then. But this temporary disability had really taken a toll on her mentally. He could repeat and assure her, completely sincerely, that she wasn’t a burden to him, but deep down, she still believed otherwise.
So, when two days later, she timidly appeared in the bedroom doorway with the question of whether he could help her wash her hair, Spencer felt like he had won the lottery.
“Sure,” he agreed, probably a bit too enthusiastically, jumping to his feet so quickly that he almost tripped.
She pretended not to notice.
In the bathroom, he slowly helped her pull the shirt over her head, careful not to catch it on the collar still around her neck or accidentally cause her any pain. 
“Be careful not to tilt your head too much, okay?” he asked, wetting her hair with the showerhead. She closed her eyes when a few drops of water splashed onto them. “Sorry!”
“For god's sake, Spencer, you're doing it more carefully than I would have done myself.”
It was true; he was acting as if he were performing some task at work that required absolute precision. He shrugged, massaging the strawberry shampoo into her hair. Foam quickly appeared, smelling sweet.
Suddenly, her hands tightened around the front of his shirt.
“Sorry,” she whispered, loosening her grip. “I got a little dizzy.”
Spencer immediately pressed his hands, still covered in shampoo, to her waist, afraid she might fall. He stared at her face for a long moment, waiting for the dizziness to pass.
And just then, her body suddenly went limp, falling forward.
Terrified, he let out a strangled cry.
“Hold on, please, don’t fall!” he kept repeating, doing everything he could to keep her upright.
Her hands hung limply on his shoulders, the foam and water soaking into his shirt, but he didn’t care at all.
“I’m right here, hold on to me as much as you can. C-c-can you hear me at all?”
He wondered whether it would be better to stand her up or lay her down while he could get to the phone and call an ambulance, when suddenly her weak touch grew stronger, and she let out a soft groan.
“Sorry.”
“Don’t you dare apologizing. I’m still holding you, can you hear me?”
His heart was pounding incredibly fast as she gently pulled her head away from his chest. He, of course, didn’t let her stand on her own, constantly supporting her body, protecting her from a fall that could be disastrous.
Together, they left the shower cabin, her hair still covered in foam.
“Are you aware that this is how it’s going to look now?” she asked seriously.
Completely unfazed, he wiped the foam from her forehead, which was dangerously close to her eyes.
“I’d rather have you lose consciousness in my bathroom, right next to me, than risk… I don’t know, cracking your head open.”
For a moment, she was silent, the color beginning to return to her pale face, her gaze becoming more alert. He had a strange feeling that she was about to start crying, and since he really didn’t want that, he pulled her close again, in his usual protective gesture. Everything around them smelled of strawberries.
“Do you really have to be this good?”
Spencer snorted.
“I’m afraid it’s just my curse.”
*
“Are these people really arguing about whether a cucumber is a fruit or a vegetable?”
Sitting on the couch, you jumped when a voice spoke right behind you. At the last second, you caught your laptop before it slipped off your lap. You had been reading some absurd discussion on an online forum you stumbled upon completely by accident. And yes, these users were indeed arguing about whether a cucumber is a fruit or a vegetable.
“Damn it, Spencer!” you shouted, putting your hand over your heart, which was pounding in an agitated rhythm. You looked at your boyfriend with a scowl. “You almost gave me a heart attack. How is it possible I didn’t hear you come in?”
He shrugged. Leaning his elbows on the back of the couch, the rolled-up sleeves of his shirt revealed the skin of his forearms. In that position, he had a perfect view of the screen on your laptop. He had just returned from work, a rainy July evening, his hair slightly damp.
“I wasn’t sneaking around. You must’ve just been lost in thought. Want to tell me what’s occupying that beautiful mind of yours?” He leaned in to place a kiss on your temple.
“Beautiful mind, huh?” you repeated, raising an eyebrow. “Just a few days ago, you told me that if a 19th-century priest heard even one thought from my head, he’d go into anaphylactic shock. Whatever that was supposed to mean.”
"In a big simplification, what I meant is that even though I love you, sometimes your way of thinking scares me."
"I'll take that as a compliment."
"By the way, I bought land for Alexander."
Alexander was your new flycatcher, which had grown so much that it completely prevented the other flowers on the windowsill from growing. Due to its conqueror tendencies, you decided to name it after one of them.
"Do you want to repot it into a new pot now...?"
"No. Now you need to come to me."
You set the laptop aside and waited for him to take a seat on the couch. Before fully snuggling into him, you untied and removed the tie from his neck, then unbuttoned the first few buttons of his shirt, just the way you liked.
You sighed almost instantly; his body was more comfortable than a pillow. Warm, with your favorite scent. You rested your head on his chest as his fingers gently combed through your hair.
In the first few weeks after you were discharged from the hospital, you couldn’t even sleep in the same bed. There was a risk that, in his sleep, he might accidentally bump into your neck and cause damage. Spencer enforced that rule strictly, as he did with every precaution related to your health.
Six months had passed since the accident, and for the past four months, you hadn’t worn a neck brace or needed help with daily tasks. But that didn’t change the fact that, sometimes, when you showered together, he would wash your hair just like he used to. Anyway, you were still attending rehabilitation and would need to for a long time, but despite that, you felt like you had fully returned to normal life.
You lifted yourself slightly to look at his face.
"I was walking to the bar today," you began.
You’d been considering going back to work for a while now, and the doctors had assured you there was no reason you couldn’t. You wanted something to occupy your hands and craved the sense of purpose that came with a task. You’d mentioned it to Spencer long ago, so he didn’t seem surprised when you brought it up.
"And? Will they take you back?"
"No. I mean, it’s not that they don’t want to, I just didn’t get there. That’s why I said I was walking and not that I went to a bar. Are you following?"
"I'm trying."
"So, listen to this. I took the subway and got off at that station near the room I used to rent."
The landlord had asked for the keys back shortly after your accident. Your arrangement had been that, in exchange for using the space, you cleaned it daily. Of course, you hadn’t been able to keep up with that anymore.
"...And I don't know, I was overwhelmed by this strange feeling, like I wanted to go back to it. Helping people."
"You help people all the time," Spencer reminded you. "All our neighbors come to you to vent about everything happening in their lives."
"That's true, but I mean, you know, professional help," you said, taking a deeper breath. You couldn't decide whether you were more excited or nervous about the decision. "I've been thinking about going back to uni, Spencer."
He straightened up, almost causing you to slide off his chest. Filled with tension, you watched his reaction closely. You’d spent the entire day wondering what he might say. Would he share your enthusiasm and support your plans, or would he try to talk you out of it, reasoning that you’d dropped out of school once and might not manage it again?
These thoughts were incredibly silly. Spencer—knowledge-obsessed, ever-curious Spencer—would never say something like that.
Instead, he pulled you into a tight embrace, whispering how incredible the idea was. You melted into it completely, feeling more elated than ever and unable to stop thinking about the crazy chain of cause and effect that had led to this specific moment, this particular relationship, and above all, this exact happiness. 
do you accept this overly sweet ending as my apology? :> tagging: @nightfullofparadox @lillaberry @fortheloveofgubler @opheliahotchner @cowboy1ikereid @penelopegarciaismygf
sorry if i forgot about someone!
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yourmomsawh0r3 · 4 months ago
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cowboy hat rule
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pairing: tyler owens x f! reader
warnings: NSFW, 18+
Tyler had no plans to go out that night. He was perfectly content to spend the evening at home, maybe watch a game or catch up on some sleep. But his friends had other ideas. They dragged him out to a bar in town, claiming he needed a night out, and after some reluctant agreement, he found himself nursing a beer at the bar, feeling slightly out of place.
That was until he saw “her”
She was standing near the end of the bar, laughing at something her sister said, a mischievous glint in her eyes. Tyler couldn’t take his eyes off her. There was something about the way she carried herself confidence mixed with a playful edge that intrigued him.
His friends were still talking about something in the background, but he wasn’t paying attention. All he could focus on was her. The way she moved, the way she smiled it was like she was teasing the entire room just by existing.
Tyler knew he had to talk to her. He wasn’t normally one to make the first move, but something about her made him bold. He excused himself from his group and made his way over to where she stood, leaning casually against the bar.
“Can I buy you a drink?” he asked, his voice low and smooth.
She turned to look at him, her eyes sparkling with amusement. “Depends,” she said, her voice equally teasing. “You think you can keep up with me?”
Tyler raised an eyebrow, a slow grin spreading across his face. “I think I’m up for the challenge.”
She tilted her head, studying him for a moment before nodding. “Alright, cowboy. I’m Y/N. And this is my sister, but don’t worry she’s already spoken for.”
Tyler chuckled, tipping his hat slightly. “Tyler. Nice to meet you, Y/N.”
She accepted the drink he ordered for her, taking a sip while maintaining eye contact with him. There was a tension in the air, something simmering just beneath the surface, and Tyler could tell she was enjoying every second of it.
“So, Tyler,” she said, leaning in closer, “how about we play a game?”
“What kind of game?” he asked, intrigued.
“Twenty-one questions,” she replied with a smirk. “I ask you a question, you ask me one. And no lying.”
Tyler grinned. “You’re on.”
They went back and forth, asking each other everything from favorite movies to the wildest thing they’d ever done. Each question was a chance to flirt, to push the boundaries just a little further. Tyler found himself getting more and more drawn to her with every answer she gave, her wit and charm only adding to her allure.
As the night went on, the tension between them grew. Tyler could feel it the way her eyes lingered on him a little too long, the way she bit her lip when he said something that made her blush. He was getting hot under the collar, and it was clear she was feeling the same.
Eventually, she leaned over and, with a sly grin, plucked his cowboy hat off his head and placed it on her own. Tyler froze, his eyes narrowing playfully as he watched her.
“I wouldn’t do that unless you know the cowboy hat rule,” he warned, his voice taking on a husky tone.
Y/N tilted the hat down slightly, a mischievous glint in her eyes. “Oh, I know the rule, alright,” she teased. “But I’m not one to follow the rules.”
Tyler’s heart pounded in his chest as he leaned in closer, his voice dropping to a whisper. “You know how to ride?”
She leaned in as well, her lips almost brushing against his as she whispered back, “Oh, sugar, I’ll give you the best ride of your life.”
Tyler felt the temperature in the room spike. His skin tingled, his pulse raced, and for a moment, he forgot where they were, lost in the heat between them. She was a challenge, no doubt about it, and Tyler was more than ready to see where this night would take them.
But before anything else could happen, she pulled back slightly, a coy smile playing on her lips as she adjusted his hat on her head. “Guess you’ll just have to wait and see, cowboy.”
Tyler grinned, shaking his head in amusement. He was hooked, and he had a feeling she knew it. Whatever happened next, one thing was for sure he wasn’t letting her out of his sight.
Tyler watched as Y/N adjusted his hat one last time, her mischievous grin sending a rush of heat through him. She held his gaze for a moment longer before turning on her heel and sauntering over to where her sister was sitting.
His eyes followed the sway of her hips, each step drawing him in deeper. The way she moved was hypnotic, effortlessly seductive, and Tyler couldn’t help but be captivated by her confidence.
She leaned down to whisper something in her sister’s ear, her voice too low for him to hear. Whatever she said made her sister’s eyes widen before they both broke into knowing smiles.
Tyler leaned back against the bar, a satisfied grin on his face as he watched her. He was in no rush to leave, content to take in every last detail of her before the night was through. And from the way she glanced back at him over her shoulder, he knew the feeling was mutual.
This wasn’t over not by a long shot.
When the bar closed, Tyler asked, "Can I walk you home, Y/N?"
She looked at him, her eyes reflecting the dim bar lights. "I'd like that, Tyler. But I have a feeling walking might not be the only thing we do."
Tyler felt a spark of anticipation. He offered her his arm, and they strolled out into the cool Texas night, the stars above them twinkling like a private audience to their burgeoning romance.
They barely made it to Y/N's apartment door before Tyler's self-control snapped. He pressed her against the door, his hands cupping her face, his lips finding hers in a passionate, hungry kiss. Y/N moaned, her hands tangling in his hair, pulling him closer. Tyler's hands traced the curve of her body, his touch igniting sparks wherever it landed.
"Tyler," Y/N gasped, breaking the kiss. "Inside. Now."
Tyler grinned, his eyes never leaving hers as he reached behind her and opened the door. They stumbled inside, their lips locked, their hands exploring. Tyler kicked the door closed behind them, his hands finding the zipper of Y/N's dress. He slowly pulled it down, his knuckles grazing her spine, sending shivers down her body.
Y/N's dress fell to the floor, leaving her in a lacy bra and matching panties. Tyler took a step back, his eyes drinking her in. "Damn, darlin', you're beautiful."
Y/N smiled, her hands going to the buttons of Tyler's shirt. "You're not so bad yourself, cowboy."
She pushed his shirt off his shoulders, her fingers tracing the muscles of his chest. Tyler groaned, his hands finding her hips, pulling her flush against him. "You feel that, darlin'? That's what you do to me."
Y/N looked up at him, her eyes filled with desire. "I want to feel more, Tyler. All of you."
Tyler growled, his hands cupping her ass, lifting her up. Y/N wrapped her legs around his waist, her arms around his neck. Tyler carried her to the bedroom, his lips never leaving hers. He laid her down on the bed, his body covering hers.
He trailed kisses down her neck, his hands unhooking her bra, freeing her breasts. He took one nipple into his mouth, his tongue swirling around the hardened peak. Y/N arched her back, her hands tangling in his hair, pressing him closer.
"Tyler, please," she gasped, her hips grinding against his.
Tyler chuckled, his hand slipping under the waistband of her panties, finding her wet and ready. "Please what, darlin'? Tell me what you want."
As Tyler settled between Y/N's thighs, his hands gently spreading her legs, he looked up at her with a mischievous grin. "You ready for me, darlin'?"
Y/N nodded, her heart pounding in anticipation. "More than ready, Tyler."
Tyler chuckled, his breath warm on her sensitive flesh. "Good, 'cause I've been dyin' to taste you all night."
He leaned in, his tongue flicking out to tease her clit. Y/N gasped, her hips lifting off the bed. Tyler hummed in approval, his hands gripping her hips to hold her in place as he began to lick and suck, exploring every inch of her pussy.
"Tyler," Y/N moaned, her fingers tangling in his hair. "That feels so good."
Tyler looked up at her, his eyes heated. "You taste fuckin' amazing, darlin'. Like the sweetest candy I've ever had."
He buried his face between her thighs, his tongue delving deep inside her, lapping up her juices. Y/N cried out, her body writhing as Tyler devoured her, his tongue working magic on her clit.
"You're so wet, baby," Tyler growled, his fingers joining his tongue, fucking her slowly. "I could spend all day down here, eat your pussy until you can't take anymore."
Y/N whimpered, her orgasm building with each thrust of Tyler's fingers, each flick of his tongue. "I'm close, Tyler. So close."
Tyler groaned, his tongue circling her clit. "Come for me, Y/N. Come all over my face."
And with a final lick, Y/N tumbled over the edge, her body convulsing as she came, her cries of pleasure filling the room. Tyler continued to lick and suck, drawing out her orgasm until she was a boneless, quivering mess.
As Tyler resurfaced, his face glistening with Y/N's arousal, he grinned up at her, his dimples on full display. "Damn, darlin', you taste even better than I imagined."
Y/N, her cheeks flushed and her chest heaving, looked down at him with hooded eyes. "And you're pretty good with that tongue of yours, cowboy."
Tyler chuckled, wiping his mouth with the back of his hand. "I aim to please, ma'am.”
Tyler's hand, still slick from Y/N's arousal, grasped his hardening length, stroking it slowly as he looked down at her. "You see what you do to me, darlin'? You make me so hard, I could fucking explode."
Y/N bit her lip, watching him with hooded eyes. "I want you to fuck me, Tyler. Hard and deep. Make me scream your name."
Tyler growled, positioning himself at her entrance. "You sure about that, sweetheart? Once I start, I ain't stopping until I've filled you up with my cum."
Y/N nodded, her breath hitching as Tyler slowly pushed into her. "Yes, Tyler. Fuck me."
Tyler groaned as he sheathed himself fully inside her. "Fuck, you're so tight, darlin'. Like a fucking glove." He started to move, his hips thrusting in a slow, steady rhythm, his cock stretching her with each stroke.
Y/N's hands clutched at his shoulders, her nails digging into his skin as he filled her completely. "More, Tyler. Faster."
Tyler obliged, his pace increasing, his cock slamming into her with more force. "Like that, darlin'? You like it when I fuck you hard?"
Y/N moaned, her body arching to meet his thrusts. "Yes, Tyler. Just like that."
Tyler reached between them, his fingers finding her clit and rubbing in time with his thrusts. "Come for me, Y/N. Come all over my cock."
Y/N's body tightened, her orgasm building. "Tyler, I'm close. So close."
Tyler's thrusts became erratic, his own release building. "Come on, darlin'. Let me feel you milk my cock."
Y/N's body shattered, her orgasm ripping through her as Tyler slammed into her one last time, his cock pulsing as he filled her with his hot cum.
They lay there, Tyler still inside her, their bodies slick with sweat and satisfaction. Tyler looked down at Y/N, his thumb brushing a strand of hair from her face. "You okay, darlin'?"
Y/N smiled up at him, her fingers tracing the lines of his tattoos. "Better than okay, Tyler. That was...incredible."
Tyler chuckled, his cock twitching inside her. "We're just getting started, sweetheart. There's plenty more where that came from."
As they lay there, their bodies cooling and their breaths evening out, Y/N stirred slightly. She propped herself up on one elbow, looking down at Tyler with a soft smile. His eyes fluttered open, meeting hers with a warm gaze.
"Hey, you," he murmured, reaching up to tuck a strand of hair behind her ear.
"Hey," she replied, her smile growing wider. "I was just thinking... are you hungry?"
Tyler chuckled, his stomach rumbling in response. "Now that you mention it, yeah, I could eat."
Y/N laughed, her eyes sparkling. "I thought so. I don't know about you, but all that... exercise always makes me hungry."
Tyler grinned, pulling her down for a quick kiss. "Me too, darlin'. Me too."
She pushed herself up, swinging her legs over the side of the bed.
Before she could leave the room, Tyler called out softly, "Hey, where are you going?" Y/N paused, looking back at him with a smile. "I was going to order us some pizza. My fridge is as bare as my bank account right now," she laughed, leaning against the doorframe.
Tyler grinned, patting the bed beside him. "Come here, let's do that together." Y/N walked back to the bed, crawling in beside him and snuggling close. She picked up her phone, her thumb hovering over the pizza app icon. Tyler, however, noticed something first. "Hey, what's this?" he asked, pointing at the lock screen of her phone.
Y/N looked down, her cheeks flushing slightly as she saw the picture. It was her, grinning widely with her arms wrapped around the neck of a beautiful chestnut horse. "Oh, that's just me and my horse, Clover," she said, as if it was no big deal.
Tyler, however, was intrigued. He pushed away loose strands of her hair, his eyes soft as he looked at her. "You have a horse?" he asked, his voice filled with surprise and something else admiration? "Why didn't you tell me that?"
Y/N shrugged, a small smile playing on her lips. "It never came up, I guess. I've had Clover for years. She's like family to me." She looked back at Tyler, her eyes sparkling with warmth. "But I'll tell you all about her over pizza, if you want."Y/N looked up from her phone, a small frown on her face. Tyler shakes his head. "What do you mean? I was going to pay for it. she says
Tyler shook his head, a playful smile on his lips. "No way, darlin'. I'm paying for dinner."
"But I don't mind paying," Y/N insisted, holding onto her phone.
Tyler reached out, gently prying the phone from her hands. "I know you don't, but I want to. Consider it my way of saying thank you for a great night."
Y/N bit her lip, considering his words. She knew better than to argue with him when he had that determined look in his eyes. "Alright," she finally conceded, "but next time, it's on me."
Tyler grinned, pulling her into his side. "Deal," he said, before leaning down to kiss her. He quickly added his credit card information to the order, pressing 'submit' before Y/N could change her mind. "There," he said, handing the phone back to her, "all taken care of."
Y/N smiled, leaning into his embrace. "You're too sweet, you know that?"
Tyler chuckled, pressing another kiss to her forehead. "Only for you, beautiful."
After devouring their large pizza, which Y/N had insisted they both eat, they collapsed onto the bed, sighs of satisfaction escaping both their lips. "I could eat that every night," Tyler said, smiling up at her.
"Totally agree," Y/N replied, snuggling up close to him.
They talked for a bit more, sharing stories of Y/N's childhood growing up on a farm and about her beloved horse, Clover. Tyler listened intently, his eyes filled with wonder and interest. It was clear he was thoroughly enthralled by the thought of her horse, the way she spoke of her with such love and passion.
As the talk went on, they noticed how late it had become, the room growing dimly lit. "Well, I think it's getting pretty late," Y/N said, her voice a little softer now. “We should probably get to bed."
Tyler nodded in agreement, though he showed no signs of moving away from her. "You're right," he murmured, his arms still wrapped around her. "But I don't really feel like moving right now."
Y/N smiled up at him, her heart filling with warmth. She didn't feel like moving either. So instead, they just sat there, holding each other close, the only sounds their gentle breathing and the creaking of the bed as they shifted against each other.
After a few moments of silence, they both knew it was time to clean up. They went about washing their faces, brushing their teeth, and making their way back into the bedroom. The atmosphere had changed slightly, a hint of intimacy now woven through the air.
Without needing to say a word, they snuggled back into bed, curling up together once more. The room was silent except for the sound of their breathing, the comfortable darkness enveloping them both.
As they drifted off to sleep, Y/N smiled softly, feeling like this was exactly where she belonged in Tyler's arms, surrounded by warmth and comfort.
tyler whispers to her "Now, about that cowboy hat rule..."
Y/N's hands went to his chest, pushing him back slightly. "Oh, I remember. But I have a rule of my own."
Tyler raised an eyebrow. "Oh, yeah? And what's that?"
Y/N smirked, her fingers deftly unbuttoning his shirt. "When I'm on top, you have to keep that hat on."
Tyler laughed, his hands going to her ass, pulling her close. "Deal. But only if you promise to give me the ride of my life, darlin'."
Y/N leaned in, her lips brushing against his ear. "Like I said earlier, honey, I'll give you the best ride of your life."
Tyler groaned, his hands squeezing her ass. "Fuck, Y/N. You keep talking like that, and I won't last."
Y/N pulled back, her eyes sparkling with mischief. "Then we'd better get started, hadn't we?"
Tyler quickly shed his shirt, his chest bare and taut. Y/N took a moment to appreciate the sight before him, her eyes trailing over the ridges of his abs and the light smattering of hair that led down to his waistband. She reached out, running her fingers over his skin, feeling the heat of him. Tyler's breath hitched at her touch, his eyes never leaving hers.
"You're playing with fire, darlin'," he warned, his voice low and husky.
Y/N smirked, "Maybe I like the burn," she repolied
Tyler groaned, his eyes dropping to take in the sight. "You're trying to kill me, aren't you?"
Y/N laughed, stepping out of her jeans and pushing him back onto the bed. She climbed onto his lap, straddling him, her hands going to the brim of his hat. "No killing allowed," she said, tipping the hat back so she could see his face. "Just some good old-fashioned fun."
Tyler's hands went to her hips, holding her in place as he lifted his own hips, pressing his erection against her through his jeans. "Fun, huh?" he asked, a wicked gleam in his eyes. "I can do fun."
Y/N gasped, her head falling back as she grinded against him, feeling the friction through their clothes. Tyler took the opportunity to lean forward, capturing one of her nipples through the lace of her bra, sucking and biting gently. Y/N moaned, her fingers tangling in his hair, holding him to her.
Tyler's hands moved to her back, unhooking her bra with ease. He pulled back, allowing the material to fall away, leaving her bare to him. His eyes darkened as he took in the sight of her, his hands reaching up to cup her breasts, his thumbs brushing over her nipples.
"Tyler," Y/N gasped, her hips moving of their own accord, seeking friction. "Please."
"You sure you can handle all this, darlin'?" Tyler asked, his voice laced with amusement.
Y/N licked her lips, her eyes meeting his. "I wouldn't have it any other way," she replied
After a series of kisses and gentle caresses, Y/N climbed on top of Tyler, her hands reaching down to grasp his hips. She rubbed her wetness against his cock, and Tyler moaned, his eyes closing in pleasure. "Mmm, yeah," he breathed, his hands moving up to grasp her hips.
Y/N leaned in closer, whispering in his ear. "I could get used to that sound," she said, her voice low and husky. "It's music to my ears."
Tyler chuckled, his eyes snapping open to look at her. "You're trying to make me come," he accused, his hands tightening on her hips.
Y/N smiled, her hips moving in slow, deliberate strokes. "Maybe I am," she replied, her voice teasing. "Maybe I just want to see you happy."
Tyler's eyes locked onto hers, his expression soft and sincere. "You make me happy," he said, his voice barely above a whisper.
Y/N's heart skipped a beat at his words, her cheeks flushing with warmth. She leaned in, her lips brushing against his ear. "I want to make you come," she whispered, her voice full of desire. "I want to hear you moan my name."
Tyler's eyes widened, his body tensing beneath hers. "Yeah," he breathed, his hands grasping her hips tighter. "Yeah, do that."
And with that, Y/N leaned in, her lips trailing down the side of Tyler's face, her hands moving down to grasp his cock, her hips moving in time with her hand, the sound of her wetness against his cock filling the air.
Y/N leaned forward, her lips brushing against Tyler's ear. "I'm going to give you the best ride of your life," she whispered, her voice husky with desire.
Tyler moaned, his hands tightening on her hips. "I can already tell you're going to be an amazing girlfriend," he growled, his eyes fixed on her face.
Y/N grinned, her body moving against his. "yeah? ," she teased, her hips slowly sliding backwards, her wetness leaving a trail along his cock.
Tyler moaned again, his eyes falling to her breasts as they bounced with each movement. "You feel so good, Y/N," he muttered, his hands moving to cup her breasts, his thumbs rubbing over her nipples.
Y/N gasped, her body arching as his hands touched her. "I'm ready for you," she panted, her hips lifting and lowering, her body teasing his cock.
"Good girl," Tyler moaned, his hands gripping her hips tighter. "You're such a good girl."
And with that, Y/N finally sank down on him, her body enveloping his cock in a hot, wet embrace. "Ah," Tyler groaned, his eyes closing as he felt her tightness wrapped around him.
Y/N moaned, her hands grasping his shoulders, her body moving up and down on his cock in slow, deliberate strokes. "Mmm, this feels so good," she panted, her breasts bouncing with each movement.
Tyler opened his eyes, his gaze fixed on Y/N's tits as she bounced on his cock. "You look so beautiful," he breathed, his hands moving up to grasp her hips. "Ride me like that, Y/N."
Y/N grinned, her body moving faster, her hips thrusting down harder. "I'm riding you," she panted, her voice full of desire.
Tyler moaned, his hands tightening on her hips. "Keep going, Y/N. Keep riding me."
And with that, Y/N continued to ride Tyler's cock, her body moving faster and harder, her eyes fixed on his face. Here is the revised paragraph:
Tyler's cock throbbed with anticipation as he gazed at Y/N's enticing body, her curves glistening with sweat. He knew he couldn't resist her any longer. "Come here, Y/N," he whispered, his voice husky with desire. "I need you now."
Y/N smiled, her eyes sparkling with anticipation. She slid closer to Tyler, her body gliding across the bed as she reached out to touch his chest. "I'm clean, Tyler," she whispered, her voice barely audible over the sound of their heavy breathing. "I'm on birth control. You can come inside me."
Tyler's eyes locked onto hers, his gaze burning with intensity. He knew this was it, the moment he'd been waiting for. With a low growl, he pushed himself deep inside Y/N, feeling her warm, wet walls envelop him. He began to thrust, his movements powerful and urgent, as Y/N's moans filled the air.
As they moved together, their bodies slick with sweat, Y/N reached down to scoop up their combined juices. She brought her hand to her mouth, moaning as she tasted their mingled essence. Then, she slid her finger back into her entrance, coating it with their shared fluids.
Tyler watched, transfixed, as Y/N brought her finger to his mouth. He sucked it in, feeling the warm, sticky liquid coat his tongue. "Fuck, you're perfect," he whispered, his voice trembling with emotion.
Y/N smiled, her eyes shining with happiness. She knew this was what she'd been waiting for, the moment when they could finally be together, their bodies and hearts entwined. And as they lay there, wrapped in each other's arms, she knew that this was only the beginning of their journey together.
And as they drifted off to sleep, their bodies entwined, they knew this was just the beginning of many more incredible rides to come.
466 notes · View notes
hysteria-things · 4 months ago
Note
(say the reader is famous also, but not an influencer—maybe like a well known model) hear me out, being close friends with madi and you guys end up moving in together and getting your first apartment
and you come home later than usual one night after ‘hanging out’ with matt and madi knows something is up just by the way you’re walking all slow and stuff and you eventually tell her that you had sex with matt for the first time and she’s just like “omgggggg????? tell me EVERYTHING!” and despite not being able to laugh too hard or else you’ll feel like your pussy is going to rip open LOL you two are just sitting on the couch giggle and talking about the whole thing
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PERFECT
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𝐩𝐚𝐢𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠: soft dom!matt x fem!reader
𝐬𝐮𝐦𝐦𝐚𝐫𝐲: although you’re a well-known model, you’ve been feeling insecure about your body lately. matt thinks it’s bogus, and wants to prove you wrong.
𝐰𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬: SMUT, insecurity, praising, oral (female receiving), pet names, p in v
𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐝 𝐜𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐭: 2,075
𝐚𝐮𝐭𝐡𝐨𝐫’𝐬 𝐧𝐨𝐭𝐞: i kind of hate this😔
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before you and matthew sturniolo started seeing each other, he would always lurk on your instagram page. the two of you met through madi, who is your best friend. you guys met at an event a few years ago and clicked instantly. fast forward to today’s time, where you now share an apartment.
you noticed matt being subtle on your page at the beginning of whatever you guys have going on. no, it’s not friends with benefits, being that you guys haven’t had sex yet. he would leave comments such as fire emojis or hypes until he was brave enough to text you a few months ago. that’s how your relationship came to be. nobody knows about it, not even madi or his brothers. you guys made the mutual decision to keep it on the down low for now.
walking through the boy’s bedroom door, you go over to the side of the bed that you sleep on, gathering some of your belongings. you just got back from a photoshoot. being a model has its ups and downs, especially when you’re on the chubbier side. you get a lot of praise from your fans, saying how you’re an inspiration. sometimes, however, it can be frustrating.
“i don’t get a kiss or even a hug?” matt says, who looks away from his phone to stare at you putting your stuff in the overnight bag you always bring.
you look over your shoulder and smile. “sorry.”
as you’re placing the bag down, he’s already sat up and sitting at the end of the bed. you go to kiss him on the temple, but instead, he pulls you over his lap to where you straddle him — although you hover a bit.
he pouts. “you’re not staying the night again?”
shaking your head, you brush a piece of hair away from his face. “i told madi i’ll be home tonight. i feel bad whenever i leave her alone, and i can’t keep up with the ‘my mom needs me to sleepover’ excuse.”
a sigh comes out as more of a groan, his lips traveling to your jaw, pecking down your neck and nipping at the skin. “you can’t put marks, matt.” you say in a whine as he reaches your sweet spot. you take a look at the clock on the nightstand, reading 9:14 pm. “it’s getting late and i have to go. i mean it.”
you get out of his grasp, another sigh leaving his body more dramatically.
matt furrows his eyebrows; something’s not right. he can sense something is bothering you, he just can’t put his finger on it. “what’s wrong?”
laughing nervously, you shake your head. “i’ll get over it.”
“that’s not what i asked— hey.” when you ignore him, he grabs your wrist to turn you around. “look at me, please. tell me what’s bothering you.”
you hate how matt’s so good at this game. he can tell when you’re upset, even in the slightest way possible. you can sugarcoat your true feelings with fake happiness, and he’ll still notice that something isn’t right.
on occasion, you like to look at comments under the recent posts that you make. most of the comments are positive, but one of the downsides of the modeling community is the negative ones. you try your best to ignore them, but sometimes they hurt. this is one of those times.
“i don’t like my body.” you barely whisper, fidgeting with his necklace as you think back to the haters.
“what?” he asks confused.
“forget about it.” you start, tugging at your hoodie sleeves. “seriously, i’ll get over it. it’s stupid people saying shit online. it happens to everybody. it’s fine.”
you do love your job, don’t get yourself wrong, but showing off your body in lingerie as a career can attract the wrong people. in general, it’s quite nerve-wracking. he kisses your cheek before his breath is against your ear. “you’re fucking gorgeous.” he bites the lobe. “let me show you, hm?”
his fingertips brush from your thighs to the hem of your shirt. “can i?” a pulsing sensation starts between your legs, taking your bottom lip with your teeth and nodding.
your shirt ends up on the floor, matt reaching behind your back to unclip your bra that ends up where your other piece of clothing is. he stares, a wide grin plastering his face. “shit.” he says lowly, squeezing your breasts before running his hands down to the buttons of your shorts. the pulsing remains, becoming much stronger.
heart thumping, you don’t make a peep as your shorts and underwear drop to the ground. you’re refusing to look down at your body, but that’s all matt is admiring. a chill runs up your spine as his lips kiss your flesh like before, but it’s more heated while you’re naked and he’s still fully clothed.
they trail to your tits, matt kneeling to reach your stomach and kissing your stretch marks, too. “so pretty.” he mumbles, ending at your thighs and repeating these actions until you’re face to face again.
going over to the bed, he lays back flat and gestures for you to come over as well. you hesitate but do so. he maneuvers your body to hover over him, or in this case, over his face. “i don’t want to hurt you.” you whine, knowing what he wants you to do.
the eye roll is so intense that it’s like you said the most out-of-pocket thing he’s ever heard in his life. “you’re soaked.” he exhales. “all of this for me?”
pink creeps on your cheeks and you nod like how you did before. being so turned on makes it almost impossible to speak. squeezing your plush thighs to keep you in place, he lowers you onto his mouth.
a gasp falls past your lips, his tongue flicking at your folds. you want to get pressure off of him at least a little bit, but he has you fully sat on his face, and he fucking loves it. soft moans along with the slurping noise fill the room, matt’s head shaking at times to feel all of you on his tongue. your pussy tastes incredible to him.
sucking at your clit, his tongue enters your sopping hole. you throw your head back, chest heaving when your moans turn into whimpers. he has you stable in his grip, pure bliss fogging your brain. “oh my god!” you cry out, slamming your eyes shut and grabbing onto his hair.
matt hums, the vibration making your legs close around his head. a hotness forms in your tummy, orgasm building the more his muscle laps in your cunt. “mm— i’m gonna cum.” you gasp, his mouth returning to your clit and sucking at your bud. you swear out loud, legs shaking while you make a mess on his face. you feel his tongue lick the excess cum from your thighs, flinching every time he does so.
in the blink of an eye, he uses his strength to flip you onto your back. your breath hitches as he runs his bottom lip up your body, the clinking of his belt entering your ears until his pants fall join the clothing pile. leaning up to take his shirt off, a grin plasters over his face, admiring your body in every way possible. you lift your head to look down at his rock-hard cock, mouth watering at the sight.
he wraps his hand gently around your throat to push your head back onto the mattress. “you want this dick?” he coos, teasing the tip at your entrance to coat it with your juices. you whine lowly, rutting your hips to get more friction. “hm?”
“y-yes.” you stammer, letting out a choked moan as matt starts pushing himself slowly into your hole. the stretch feels mesmerizing, your eyes fluttering closed when he rolls his hips.
“this pussy has been waiting for this.” he says, humming with contentment when your walls wrap around him. “you look so sexy underneath me.”
“f-faster, please.” you choke out, gripping onto the sheets by your sides.
the movement of his hips plow into you more, your ass slapping against his thighs and an erotic sound comes from where you two are conjoined. numerous curses and whimpers escape your body. his balls slap repeatedly against your clit, the feeling making you gasp and your legs shake. “fuck, matt! yeah!”
“i bet those haters are just jealous they can’t have this beautiful body to themselves.” he starts, pausing to catch his breath. “they can’t fuck it like i can.”
“y-you can’t say that.” you whimper, until the two fingers without rings pacify you. you gag a little around them before you start to suck on them, drool dribbling down your chin. the bed starts to squeak when you wrap your legs around his waist to have him go deeper, your moans muffled by his fingers when he hits your g-spot, back arching from the bed.
“there she is.” he whispers, smiling proudly. “that’s it. you want to cum, baby?”
you clench around his shaft, legs shaking more than they were before. you nod eagerly, the knot tightening in your belly. matt groans, watching your hands go to your breasts to tease and pinch the nipples for more stimulation. you can’t make it out, but you could’ve sworn he mumbles so hot under his breath when his dick twitches inside of you. your eyes roll back, mouth opening wide to scream of pleasure.
body trembling, the knot becomes undone when your cum smears down his red dick, the sight having matt pull out with a whimper. he strokes himself a few times before painting your stomach white.
he collapses on top of you, pecking your lips and whispering sweet nothings into your ear. you get a glimpse of the clock and sigh. 10:32 pm. talk about getting home early.
⋆⁺₊⋆ ❦ ⋆⁺₊⋆
you finally get to your apartment complex forty-five minutes or so later. you live on the third floor and usually take the stairs, but you’re so soar that you wobble yourself into the elevator. you walk as fast as your legs can take you down the hallway to your front door, keys jingling once you tap the key fab to open it. a beep noise echos, meaning you succeeded.
once you turn the handle, you're greeted with the TV lighting up the living room and madi’s head snapping in your direction where she’s sitting on the couch. “it’s about time! did you not see my texts or calls? you had me worried. you’re never this late after a shoot.”
“i’m sorry.” you exhale. “i had to make a pit stop.”
her eyes slit, watching the way you’re semi-limping to the seat next to her. you grunt when you manage to sit, looking over to see her mouth agape but smiling. “what?”
“you had sex.”
“you don’t know that.” you scoff, but hide your face as much as possible when you blush, reminiscing about tonight.
“girl.” she gives you the are-you-serious stare. “you’re practically shining with the post-orgasm glow, and you came walking in here like an old lady. who was it with? do i know them? tell me, tell me, tell me!”
madi grabs onto your arms and shakes them in excitement, bouncing on her knees on the cushion. “mattandihavebeenseeingeachotherbehindeverbody’sbacks.”
her nose scrunches. “huh?”
you exhale sharply, checking your phone that’s on your lap to see some messages from the boy that had you screaming on his cock over an hour ago. “matt and i have been seeing each other behind everybody’s backs.”
she claps her hands once, awfully loud, before pointing at you. “i fucking knew it. tell me everything. pretty please.”
so you do. you explain everything — well, you leave out the explicit details — and she’s beaming the whole time as you speak. your phone goes off again, and she grabs it before you can. “madi, come on!” you screech between giggles. she reads the messages with wide eyes, and you peek over her shoulder to see.
matt :)
babe
you left your bra here
should i try it on?
i’ll look good in it
hello :(
did you fall asleep already?
i think we should make it official
be my girlfriend please
i’ll see you tomorrow
i love you
whoops never said that before
oh well!
goodnight <3
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𝐭𝐚𝐠 𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭!
@bunbunbl0gs @lexisecretaccx @thy-mission @angelic-sturniolos111 @sophssturn @moncherriis @janiellasblog @blahbel668 @meg-sturniolo @mattslolita @sturnbaby @imwetforyourmom @tillies33ssss @sturnifyed @raysmayhem-72 @ripmattitude @p1xieswrld @alorsxsturn @multiluvr @delilahprentiss @tworosesblackthorn @gnxosblog @junnniiieee07 @flowerxbunnie @imaslut4kehlani @sturniolosandmoree @hearrtsturns @stars4matt @freshsturns @etershine @tpvmz @sukiipjs @h3arts4harry @sturnioloblogs @creamoncreamoncream2 @ivyyyyyysposts @iluvm4ttsturni0l0 @mbsbaby @mattsdollie @thesturniolos @nononopenono1 @bitchydragonparadise @gdsvhtwa @hrt-attack @dwntwn-strnlo @venusbabysblog @meerkatzthings @bernardsbendystraws @hoes4matthew
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unorthodoxfaithxx · 4 months ago
Text
Depressed Reader X Yandere
Nsfw ; manipulation ; yandere ; female reader
Yuta Okkotsu is not a normal man — he knows this better than anyone. Because what kind of man stalks the object of his affections 24/7, showers them with gifts just to be rejected every time, contemplates kidnapping them, and waits and waits and waits in hopes that one day, they’ll change their minds and love him back? 
Call him a simp, but his love for you is heavy, suffocatingly so. And when it comes to words, he can’t even begin to describe what he feels for you. He loves you. He wants you. He needs you. He’s absolutely obsessed. 
You don’t love him, but he knows he can change that now. Because tonight, you finally sought him out. One text sent him driving to your neighborhood at 2 AM at ungodly speeds. It was three words. “I need you”. 
Finally. Months of waiting, yearning, pining, going insane, have finally come to fruition. 
He stands at your apartment doorway nervously, wringing his hands while he waits for you to open the door. A nervous habit he never grew out of. When the door slowly creaks open, he quickly smooths his shirt and tries to hold back his excitement. 
Your eyes are red and puffy from crying, he could tell, but you look gorgeous nonetheless. You’re in nothing but a crop top and some shorts - a look he decides is absolutely ravishing, and it takes everything within him to not jump you right then and there. 
“Oh angel, what’s wrong?” 
Yuta immediately holds you tightly in his arms, unabashedly breathing in your scent and relishing the closeness of your bodies together.
You cling onto him like he’ll disappear, and a swell of contentedness blooms in his chest. You’re too adorable. 
He shuts the door behind him and ushers you into the couch in the living room, as if he’d been there before. 
He has, but not when you were present.
You eventually calm down enough to talk. 
“I just, I feel so fucking empty, Yuta. I hate myself. I feel ugly. I’m lonely. There’s like a big whole in my chest that won’t go away.”
Oh, you poor thing. He asks you if you’ve taken your meds lately, and you give a tiny nod, face pressed into his soft, white sweater. 
You’ve struggled with depression for the longest time, this he knows. He doesn’t quite understand what had made it worse lately, but that was okay. He’ll make it all better soon.
“I’m sorry for crying and calling you over. I just feel so weak right now, I—“
“Hey,” He lowers his head to meet you at eye level, hands gently caressing both of yours, “You are not weak—You’re the strongest person I know. It’s okay to not be okay, got that?”
You only sniffle in return.
“Is there anything I can do for you, angel?”
It’s quiet for a minute, but you eventually open your mouth to say pathetically, “Make me feel better. Help me make all this go away.”
Finally. You’ll let him take care of you. There’s no going back now. 
He could protect you. Maybe not fix you, but he’ll do whatever he can to help. 
“Sweet thing, of course. I’ll give you whatever you want…c’mere, I’ll take care of  everything, okay?” He wipes the tears from your eyes, placing a kiss atop your head. 
“I know how to get rid of that hollow feeling in your chest.” He smiles sweetly, but his next words possess a threatening undertone to them. His eyes filled with love, he proposes, 
“We just fill your body up with something else.”
——————————————————————
“Too big,” You mewl pathetically.
The two of you are in your bed, clothes strewn across the bedroom floor. You look so beautiful underneath him, Yuta thinks. He stares at you with adoration as you take in what he has to offer. 
Your eyes are teary, face flushed, with your body wriggling under him. You try to move from him, to escape the intense stimulation you feel, but the young man holds onto your hips tightly, his member sheathed all the way inside you. 
“Shhhhh, you’re okay baby. Just relax,” His sickeningly sweet voice coaxes you to give under his hold. “See? You’re doing so good right now.” 
Yuta is a gentle lover. He took his time undressing you, and he takes his time fucking you. Slowly, he pumps in and out of you, letting you feel every inch of his cock enter and leave your pretty pussy.
It feels good, you think. So fucking good. For the first time in a long time, you feel full. 
Through your tears, Yuta looks like an angel. 
His delicate, pale skin seems to glow with sweat in the night, and for a second you wonder if he’s a being sent from heaven to turn your life around. A pang of guilt hits your chest when you think about all the times you’ve rejected his advances. Was this okay? Deep down you knew that once this was over, there was no going back. 
“It’s okay,” He hums when he sees another tear fall from your eye, “You’re okay.” He leans down to smother you with kisses, hands having left your hips in favor of playing with your breasts instead. 
“Oh, sweetheart. You feel so good.” He coos. 
You’re so soft and pliant under his hands, just like he’s always thought you’d be. It takes everything in him not to come inside you yet. Your soft moans aren’t helping, the seductive sounds turning him on so much that he wishes he had your room bugged with a recording device so he could save them for later. 
He can tell you’re close when your legs start shaking, and he sings you praises as he coaxes you into an orgasm that sends you to the moon. 
“There you are,” He speaks softly into your ear, “Doing so good for me. It’s okay now, just cum.” 
He’s not long after you, pulling out to pump thick ropes of white onto your stomach.
You’re all tuckered out afterwards, and he finds it endearing when he comes back from the bathroom with a clean towel to wipe you down, only to see you out for the night. 
He loves you so much. And whether you’re ready for it or not, he can’t wait to spend the rest of his life with you. 
(Sorry if this was too short guys, I haven’t been doing the greatest creatively and all but gave up on this fic until I saw the latest JJK chapters. Love you all! )
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tweedlydumbtweedlydoo · 5 months ago
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Admit it | Damon Salvatore x reader
Summary: Damon doesn’t like that you’re talking to another guy. 
A/N: This has been in my drafts for a while. Hope you guys enjoy it! x 
Go follow my fic rec blog! ---> @imaginationgonewild0912
**MASTERLIST**
Requests: {OPEN} closed
** Rules for Requesting **
** Who I Write For **
********************************************************************************************NOT MY GIF, CREDIT TO OWNERS
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“Who is that clown?” Damon asked Alaric from his seat at the bar, nodding toward you and some guy sitting at booth, a little too close for his liking. 
Alaric twists the stool, shrugging, “Don’t know,” he twists it back to the bar, sipping on his bourbon, “new guy?” 
He narrows eyes at the two of you, “Never seen him around here. Maybe I should go introduce myself.”
Alaric grabs his shoulder, as he steps off the stool, “You’re already on thin ice with her. I wouldn’t.” 
Damon gives him his signature smile, “When am I never on thin ice with her?” He shakes off Alaric’s hand and struts on over to your booth. 
You roll your eyes as you see him approach, sliding away from your date, “Damon.” 
“y/n.” He gives you a quick smile and then turns to your date, “And you are?” He places an intimating hand on his shoulder, giving it a tight squeeze.
“u-uh Luke-” 
“Damon, don’t you have somewhere else to be? I don’t know, drowning in a bottle full of bourbon? Instead of bothering me and my date.” 
You place a hand on your dates arm, “sorry about him-he’s just that annoying itch you can’t get rid of.” You smile, “What were you saying?” 
Luke glances up at Damon, “Is he like your brother or something?” 
“No-” 
“No, I’m just her handsome and very sexy ex she can’t get rid of.” 
You roll your eyes, “We dated for maybe a week. If that.” 
“best week of your life if I remember correctly,” Damon says. 
“you know I think it would be best if I go-” Luke starts to slide out of the booth. 
You put a hand on his arm stopping him, “No it’s fine, you don’t have to go.” 
“I think that would be a GREAT idea.” Damon grins, stepping away so he can exit the booth, an arm toward the door. 
Luke is intimated, hurrying out of the restaurant. He doesn’t even stop to look back. 
“Damn it Damon!” You huff, gathering your stuff. “What the hell is wrong with you?” You start to slide out the booth and when you stand, Damon steps in front of you so you’re chest to chest. 
His smell is intoxicating. It takes you back to the week you two did date. There wasn’t a moment the two of you weren’t touching on each other. It ended in a fight because he wouldn’t admit his true feelings for you. Throughout the week together, he’d made you feel special but once you began talking more serious, it was like he got spooked. He turned everything around, making you believe the week was a temporary thing, never would be serious and you two would only go as far as messing around. It broke your heart because you saw a different Damon that week. You’d fallen in love with him and fallen hard. Your opened up to Damon, let him in and then to find out he didn’t feel the same? It destroyed you. 
“Oh come on, he was a loser. He wasn’t your type. A blonde accountant working a 9-5? He was pathetic. He probably couldn’t even figure out how to get your bra off-” 
“He was a nice guy!” You defend, “He was kind. Thoughtful. He was willing to be in a serious relationship. The absolute opposite of you.” You push past him, heading toward the exit of the bar. 
Damon watches as you leave, a content smile on his face. He’d won this time. Again. 
“Why can’t you you admit you love her?” Alaric asks, “instead of ruining every relationship she’s in.” 
Damon glares at Alaric, narrowing his eyes, “I’ll kill you. Again.” 
Alaric rolls his eyes, “Grow up Damon. She’s not going to be around for forever. She’s eventually going to grow tired of Mystic Falls, grow tired of you being around and move away. Especially if you keep ruining every relationship she’s in.”  He gives his shoulder a rough squeeze, before heading back to the bar, leaving Damon with his thoughts. 
(listened to All I Need by Within Temptation while I wrote this. feeling all the emotions) 
You angrily wipe at the tears rolling down your cheeks. Why did he have to be this way? He was the one who didn’t feel the same way as you. He was the one who ruined the relationship with you and now it seems like he’s made it his personal mission to ruin your life and any chance of happiness. 
Damon stalks you from the shadows, watching you walk to your car. Maybe Alaric was right. He couldn’t keep doing this. He could see it was hurting you. And for what reason? Because he was too chicken to admit he loved you?
You slammed your car door and placed your forehead against the steering wheel, letting the emotions take over; your body shook with the sobs.
He clinched his eyes as in pain as he heard your sobs. He couldn’t let this go on any longer. You needed to know the truth.
You jumped and clutched a hand to your chest when someone knocked on the window, “Jesus Christ Damon! You scared the shit out of me!”
“Open the door.” He tugs on the handle.
“Just leave me alone,” you plead wiping at your eyes, “I can’t do this anymore.”
“Y/n, please,” he begs, “open the door.”
You do as he asks and open the door. He holds out his hand for you, “what?”
“Take my damn hand.”
You reluctantly take it, stepping out of the car. “Damon seriously, I really don’t have the energy to deal with whatever you’ve got-
His large hands cup your cheeks forcing your eyes to meet his, “I love you. Ok?” He pauses for a moment, his thumb subconsciously caressing your cheek, “I was scared to admit it. It scared me to feel such.. love for you. The last time this happened I was left with my heart broken. I didn’t want it to happen again. My heart burns for you-” his eyes are full of desperation as they stare down at you, “I can’t imagine living this life without you.” He uses one hand to clutch at his chest, “it physically pains me to not be near you. To know all I’ve done is hurt you and for my own selfish reasons. Because I was too scared to admit the truth.”
There’s a heavy silence between you. He can hear your heart racing.
Your small hand reaches up to cup his face and he leans into your touch, desperate for it.
Another tense moment passes and in the heat of passion, your fingers are laced in his dark brown locks, crashing your lips against his.
~
Comments, likes and reblogs are always greatly appreciated! I finished this on my phone, forgive me for any mistakes
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averageallogene · 1 year ago
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Tighnari ♡⊹˚ Heated mind (NSFW)
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✧˖°. Summary: An Amurta student gets stationed in Gandharva Ville to practice medicine, growing a bond with Tighnari. Becoming quite close, Tighnari finds himself in a predicament that hits him like a truck right around the time his heat starts up.
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fem. reader (3rd person) ; plot with concluding smut ; cw for breeding, character in heat.
8k words.
notes. Starting off strong lmao- This idea has literally been stuck in my head for days! I can’t get over the idea of Tighnari in heat. Just. Just. Just. Oh my good lord. No thoughts head empty just Tighnari in heat, needy as well as confused over his ordeal. Enjoy! ✧˖°.
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Tighnari considered himself a busy man. The life of a forest watcher was certainly not easy, yet he thought it was all the more fulfilling. Between training the rangers stationed with him and studying the ecosystems of the rainforests of Sumeru, the young researcher never thought over anything else. For quite a while, he was very content.
That was, until he had what, in hindsight, would be a fateful encounter.
Many would pass between Gandharva Ville, including from other lands as well as from within their main city. He was used to dealing with people, being a very educated and overall pleasant person to speak with; in fact, more so when the topic at hand regarded either the ecosystems or anything else biology related. Collei would usually direct curious folk to him so Tighnari would indulge in any questions they might have, as well as, maybe, the occasional request if it was deemed appropriate. It was, for most, a most agreeable arrangement.
It started that way, in fact. An agreeable arrangement. A young woman, an Amurta student from the Akademiya, had been stationed in Gandharva Ville so she could practice the medicine that she’d learned. After all, no doctor could graduate without eventually moving on to the nitty and gritty. It was something most in the branch were nervous about, and the scent in the air upon her first arrival was definitely noticed. Nervousness, but also excitement. The promising student was more than ready to begin her practical studies amidst the forest rangers, and Tighnari saw no reason for denying her a station. After all, it would be most hypocritical of him not to, as a researcher himself.
Besides, perhaps the scolding of an outsider would do well to his rangers. Some were too used to ignoring his (frankly, undeniably justified!) ‘harsh’ reprimands. 
She was very pleasant to work with, thankfully. A kind spirit who got along well with most, determination glowing from her very being. Tighnari worried their lifestyle would somehow be incompatible with her own, given the lack of readily available supplies in Gandharva Ville for a nearly graduating doctor, yet he found she would very easily adapt herself.
“Thank you for your concern, wholeheartedly!” She would beam with positive radiance, all the while still holding a twinge of formality in the way she addressed him. Sure, he was technically her senior, but Tighnari wasn’t one to care for such things. “However, I’ll manage. I just wish for you to count on me whenever needed!”
Oh, she was needed alright. The forest rangers were… Clumsy, to be gentle. Airheaded at best, undeniably, stupidly foolish at worst. Tighnari gave them the needed manual for a reason, yet some would find a way to consume something they shouldn’t and it would end in potential disaster being averted, or get injured upon not being careful enough in analyzing the area they were assigned to.
A few were even obtuse enough to run off into the forest and find some time to fool around in ways that were more noticeable than they’d like to think. Tighnari’s ears were as sharp as they could come, and if distance wasn’t the issue, the odors they’d return with sure gave everything away. Ah, and the avoidance of his gaze was surely a telltale sign.
To say the least, disappointment had become something deeply embedded with the job.
“That’s just a part of life.” [F/N] would calmly state, shrugging her shoulders whenever the inexperienced forest rangers were caught in anything less than savory. That had, apparently, become more of a routine between a particular couple than what their master would enjoy. “Curiosity is bound to sprout with any sort of attraction. The important thing is to ensure you’re both safe, lest we want to end up in a compromising predicament mhm?” 
“Y-Yes, miss [F/N]...” The embarrassment was palpable amongst the pair, it being amplified with the indifference their stationed doctor displayed. Surely, they thought, they were being judged by a mile away, even as the medicine student gave them the best contraceptive she had readily available before they leaped out of the spot.
“You’re far too lenient.” Tighnari’s voice could be heard as he entered her tent in their stead, catching the smile that blossomed on her face. He on the other hand crossed his arms, a small sigh leaving his lips as he shook his head. “They’re being irresponsible by doing such activities during their shifts!”
“I’m not disagreeing with you, you know…” She laughed softly, getting up before rearranging her small wooden box of emergency medication. Whilst ensuring everything was in its place, she continued to chat with him. “I just believe that tackling the issue with a more open mind will ease our way to the solution. If we shame them, they’ll just continue to try and do it in secret.”
She had to bite her tongue before she elaborated on how the female ranger had tried stealing one of the contraceptives from her small cabinet the day prior. Perhaps it wasn’t the best idea to tell Tighnari, or another scolding would shower down heavier than the rain that would usually pour into the rainforest. Yes, [F/N] thought the more open approach was definitely a better arrangement, even if a fraction of the embarrassment it could be for the couple.
“Besides, it’s a natural part of life. Sex shouldn’t be demonized.” 
“Well, with that I agree. I just-”
“Tighnari…” Her soft voice cut him off, though he didn’t quite mind. The Amurta student reached his side before placing an understanding hand on his shoulder, offering him a knowing smile. It certainly was a different dynamic from the one where they’d started off with, but the friendly relationship wasn’t at all unwelcomed. “Don’t worry, they’ll go back to normal soon enough. They’re just… Well, excuse me for a lack of better wording, but- Horny. Give them a few days to explore themselves and the high will soon die down.”
The forest ranger gave her a silent look - one his colorful irises spoke for themselves. One of a silent sigh, yet one that also agreed with her despite being tired of the ordeal. After all, Tighnari cared for their safety, and the mere thought of anyone getting frisky in the open wilderness was… Erhm, well… Conflicting, now that he thought about it. 
“Oh, anyway, since you’re here,” Her tone shifted, clear excitement and curiosity peaking through as she turned around and walked across her small tent. His gaze followed her, fluffy ears perking up as his tail swayed. He knew all too well what that tone was reserved for. “I wanted to ask for your thoughts on something. I’m trying to adapt a medicinal brew that’s originally from Liyue, but I can’t quite match this last ingredient with one that may be available in the rainforest… Could you please give me your insight?”
How could he not? The mere spark in her eye was enough to fill his chest with a sense of validation, heart swelling up. Well, that’s what he thought it was, at least. It surely was pleasant to feel respected, as well as sought after for one’s own interpretations. Tighnari couldn’t possibly deny helping such a cause.
Well, in truth, Tighnari couldn’t possibly deny her. That hadn’t occurred to him yet, though. He simply chucked it all to [F/N] being a pleasant company to be around, especially with them having so much in common. Their love of biology and the intricacies of the ecosystems was merely enough to fuel their conversations for hours, lasting way longer than the oil lamps they’d burn to light them well into the night. He found her voice pleasant to listen to, a delight as her tone would shift higher and lower between her curiosity and her contemplation to whatever he had to add to the conversation. The way her eyes would sparkle in such a wondrous way, his reflection staring right back at him as her face would focus solely on him, illuminated by the warm light. His ears would adjust carefully, slowly, shifting ever so slightly so he’d listen to every little syllable she spoke, every little sound she made as his tail wagged slowly, like a trance, unbeknownst to him as well. 
For quite a while, Tighnari was in blissful ignorance. He merely basked in her presence as one would delight in the sunlight of a spring’s afternoon, the warmth enveloping his very being as her fragrance engraved into him. The soft undertones of her natural scent became something he’d experience everyday, almost searching for it even without any clear intent, thinking of an interesting enough topic to discuss long after his legs had begun walking. [F/N]’s stay was well deep into several weeks at that point, and Tighnari didn’t even dare to think about her possible absence in the future. He’d found a companion in her, one he really enjoyed spending time with. 
A mere friend, he thought.
“I need to return to the Akademiya.” [F/N] had repeated, her tone soft as she gave him a smile smaller than usual. Still, it remained radiant to his eyes despite the sudden clench from within his ribcage.
“Oh?” He cleared his throat, trying to lift his head in a natural manner to gaze at her once more. “How come?”
He suddenly felt his tongue bitter.
“Well, I need to submit the reports I’ve been working on…” She reminded him again, waving gently the stack of papers she carried in her arms. His unfocused face didn’t go unnoticed, prompting her to stare at him with a frown that tugged at his heartstrings in a way he couldn’t quite figure out. “Tighnari… Are you alright? You seem a little-”
“I’m fine, don’t worry about me!” He reassured her, getting up from his chair before rounding up his table. He forced a smile to his face, masking the sudden sadness he felt wash over him. “Have you re-read your papers? Gotta make sure everything is spotless before being submitted.”
A silent plea, please stay a little longer, take a little more time to be close to me. Though, he himself wasn’t fully aware of it, either. 
“Yeah, spent the whole night last night reviewing it… I’m a little nervous, even though they’re just reports.” She laughed it off, his belly feeling as though it was suddenly swarmed with butterflies. “It’s not even my final paper and I’m already so stressed! What if I don’t meet the standard?”
“Are you serious?” He scoffed, hands resting on his hips before he offered her a more sincere smile. “[F/N], you’ll do great. I’ve not met a more hardworking student than you in a long time… I wholeheartedly believe in you.”
“Oh… Thank you, Tighnari.” It was her turn to feel butterflies suddenly blooming in her belly, silently praying he wouldn’t listen to the loud pitter patter of her heart. 
The two of them remained still for a few seconds, though it felt more like an eternity. His eyes stared into hers, awkwardly shifting as if trying to find the words to speak. Please stay, Let me review the papers before you go?, I think I like you too much to have you leave, were all thoughts racing through his mind, some cutting off amidst the others as he watched her tuck some hair behind her ear. And feeling his gaze on her so intently, the sudden blush forming on her cheeks was inevitable as she finally spoke again.
“W-Well I, I should get going. Sumeru City isn’t far from here, but I can’t afford to be late…” Tighnari’s tail slowly lowered at those words, though his face remained supportive for her. “I’ll try to visit if I don’t get stationed here again. I really enjoyed your company, Tighnari.”
“Likewise.”
Amidst his lovesick thoughts, he couldn’t afford to say more. There was hope bubbling within him, she could get stationed in Gandharva Ville again. His tail raised a little at that, though he still watched as she inevitably left to return to the Akademiya. Most of the other rangers wished her well before she departed, and just like that, life returned to normal. 
Her sudden absence was… Unexpectedly uncomfortable. There was a constant sense of dread within Tighnari’s stomach, one that had him wearily gaze around himself as his ears remained perked, twitching, unrested. He himself was unrested. The nights were long, the sounds of the frogs and the river under Gandharva Ville were no longer calming. It all felt suffocating, strangely quiet without the scent of the oil lamps burning besides him and [F/N], without her presence to soothe him. He’d toss and turn around his mattress, hot before feeling cold, hugging his tail close to himself before wanting to do nothing with it, getting a glass of water before trying to lay back down only to remain pacing until the sun rose again… It was getting rather stressful, ridiculous even.
It took him an excruciatingly long time to finally realize what could possibly be the cause of his mood shifts. In fact, the moment when it all clicked in his head was outright ridiculous.
For those oddly unaware, Tighnari is, in fact, a hybrid. A fennec fox hybrid, in specific. This is stated, because it would seem he himself had somehow forgotten about this very important fact for an extended period of weeks. Amidst the companionship [F/N] had provided during her stay, Tighnari had subconsciously dismissed this very important thing about himself that he’d been able to keep in mind for the entirety of his life up to that point. It may seem mostly unimportant to most, but to him, it is something that greatly impacts his lifestyle, as well as a specific decision that many would do brazenly.
The only night he’d somewhat managed to rest due to exhaustion, he found himself suddenly sweating amidst his sleep. He held his pillow tightly as his body turned, groaning quietly to himself as his mind still dozed off between the state of being awake and asleep. His breathing quickened, the guttural sounds he made being muffled as his fangs bit into the fabric of his pillow. He began profusely sweating, his mind running wild as his body shifted itself, rocking with rhythm against his mattress as he sought any sort of release from the sudden tense bubble he felt in his lower area. The pain grew tenfold, coaxing his body to jerk harder into the bed, huffing and nearly drooling as his teeth nearly ripped through the fabric in drunken pleasure. The sensation transformed to something delightful, him experiencing undeniable gratification as his hardening length pressed against whatever he rutted against. His hips shook violently almost, the strands of his hair sticking to his forehead as his temperature increased, chasing the high he sought as his mind graced him with a delightful dream he couldn’t resist.
“[F/N]... [F/N]...” He groaned against his drooled pillow, fangs biting again as he followed with a low groan. 
“Ah, T-Tighnari~” He imagined the way [F/N]’s voice would sound in such a lewd scenario, the sighs escaping from her pretty lips enough to leave him begging for more. It all felt excruciatingly real, the pain mixing with the pleasure as he ignorantly fucked the bed instead.
“[F/N]!” He repeated like a sacred mantra, rutting wildly against his mattress before the mere shock of his orgasm spasmed him awake. 
His eyes opened wide, panting before registering his teeth were wildly tearing into his only pillow. Letting it go, the ranger breathed heavily, trying to gather himself as his body shivered from the high coming to a halt. His mind still replayed the way her body glistened under his own, her gaze staring at him with an erotic sense of drunken pleasure, mouth gracing him with noises he’d never considered imagining up until that point. Tighnari slowly shifted his hands to support his weight, lifting himself from his bed before realizing the accident on his lower region. His face burst in heat as he pieced everything together, another groan leaving his throat as he slipped his fingers through his hair. 
“W… What a mess…” He mumbled, biting his lower lip as he felt the sudden urge to dig himself a hole and hide in it. The clothing stuck to him as his cock throbbed occasionally, clearly not satisfied and wanting more. Shame mixed with desire as he pondered his predicament, weighing in on if he should even attempt to relieve himself or try to ignore the yearning he felt wash over him violently.
Tighnari was in heat. He was careful to track whenever his cycles would come so he could prepare himself, both mentally and physically, but it seemed to have hit him by surprise this particular time. In truth, amidst [F/N]’s company, he hadn’t even remembered it was right around the corner. And with her sudden absence, he suddenly came to a realization this particular time it would be far more challenging to deal with it. 
With his hands gripping his hair as he sat there, everything ran a mile inside his head as he finally decided to confront his reality - not only did he desire someone, he wanted someone as his mate. This could very well go terribly bad, for his particular dna demanded him to remain with one partner for his entire life span. Would he be up for it? That answer came rather quickly, surprising even himself. Yes, he was up to it. [F/N] would be a delightful partner, he could feel it within himself. His tail wagged violently at the mere thought, desire and bliss mixing in a dangerous elixir as he felt himself throbbing yet again. Still… Would [F/N] accept him as is? He couldn’t possibly force her or anyone to stay with him, that was out of the question. Not only was it undoubtedly wrong to do so on so many levels, Tighnari was fully aware of the responsibility accepting him came with. He’d have to be with a partner that fully understood that side of him, as well of his needs and the unnegotiable commitment it required.
He could only audibly sigh, staring at his own body as he felt the pain kick back in. Nothing he wasn’t used to, yet the neediness now had a point of focus - something it would be utterly difficult to focus on his job with.
 [F/N]’s stay in the Akademiya wasn’t particularly long. She was mostly utterly joyous, for the reports she’d submitted were impeccable. Honestly, she inwardly credited Tighnari for most of her success, for his continuous support and feedback helped her work immensely. His mere existence was the sole reason she nearly begged her superior to return to Gandharva Ville, hoping to remain there as a doctor for a while longer. Sure, she found the other forest rangers lovely as well, but unlike Tighnari, she was well aware of her blooming feelings for the Forest Ranger. In truth, he made her feel like a teenager with a crush, giddy and giggly whenever she thought of him or his big fluffy tail and his pretty ears and his adorable voice and everything else- Suffice to say, [F/N] was ecstatic when it was reported back to her that she indeed had permission to remain stationed there for another fixed period.
The trip wasn’t long before she was back in familiar grounds, the smile on her face thrice as big as the one she had on her first day. She could practically hear her heart jumping out of her chest as she gazed around, silently looking for Tighnari even as his colleagues welcomed her back with open arms. All were happy to have her back, especially some who believed her presence would improve their master ranger’s mood - perhaps, some innocently wondered, she had something that could help him with his problem. Something that was silently acknowledged, but no one dared to even bring up. 
“Where’s Tighnari?” She had finally worked up the courage to ask, smile hopeful as another ranger gave her a sheepish one.
“Oh, well… He’s been mostly confined to his own tent. He’s uh… Been going through a rough period.” A male ranger explained to her, lifting his hand upon realizing the sudden panic in her expression. “He’s mostly fine, miss [F/N]. It’s a more uh, intimate matter.”
Her eyes widened as she registered what it could possibly mean, clicking rather quickly in her head. Simply mouthing an ‘oh’, she wondered if it would be appropriate to even visit him in such a state. [F/N] was not ignorant after all, and her vast knowledge in biology was a handy one when it came to fully understanding the intricacies of the body. 
Everyone quietly reassured her that he was still able to receive visits, though they were more regulated and spread out so as to not overwhelm him. As everyone gave her the brief rundown though, Tighnari was beyond jittery. He nearly twitched as he squinted his eyes shut, breathing heavily as he attempted to rationalize with his own mind. He could’ve sworn he smelled it, her scent, her lovely smell he’d come to adore, but he feared it was nothing more than his heat clouding his judgment. After all, he’d received no letter warning him of her return, so he’d figured it wasn’t happening. That was, until he heard a very familiar voice, his body jumping in his seat as his eyes stared at the entrance of his tent with pure eagerness.
“Tighnari? It’s me, [F/N]... Is it okay if I come in?”
His tail swayed wildly, his ears twitching as he felt his breath hitch. Doing his very best to keep himself in check, he cleared his throat before putting down the pen he wrote with.
“Of course, come in.” He hummed.
His eyes nearly dilated as he watched her walk in, closing the door behind her. His cheeks flushed with a faint color, eyes betraying his respect as they wandered lower. His state blurred his judgment, filling his mind with thoughts variable to the dreams he’d been receiving almost daily. The fox hybrid nearly salivated as he watched her clothing hug her figure almost sinfully, mentally slapping himself as he offered her a seat wherever she’d like. Watching as she came closer, he stalked her figure as she sat in front of him, her scent invading his mind as he fully embraced it. 
“I… Heard about why you’re here.” She spoke with pure sympathy, all the while attempting to reassure him she wasn’t in any way scared or repulsed by his situation. He simply smiled with thankfulness, listening to her every word. “Sorry, I should’ve sent a letter announcing my return. I wanted to surprise you, but had I known it would coincide with your cycle-”
“Please, it’s quite alright.” He shook his head, offering her a look that only filled her with endearment. “I’m very happy to see you again, [F/N]... Although… Are you only visiting, or are you actually coming back to remain stationed here?”
Her smile nearly made him dizzy. “The latter.” She confirmed his question, Tighnari inwardly throwing his hands in the air in both bliss and frustration. Oh, he absolutely adored the idea of her around him, but that meant he’d have to suddenly chuck up the energy to discuss something very important with her.
“Really? That makes me so happy!” He sighed with happiness, wanting nothing more than to hold her close. He watched every little move she made, the way her shoulders tensed, the way her smile grew shier, the way her legs squeezed together as she remained seated in front of him… Unlike before, he no longer had the willpower to deny himself his feelings nor his desires. 
“I’m very happy to be back, too.” She confessed, her cheeks gaining an endearing blush. Between shy glances and hidden confessions, Tighnari figured he would simply have to bulldoze through the topic. He couldn’t wait any longer, else he’d burst or regret ever doing something harsh amidst his haze.
“Since you’re here, [F/N]... I’d like to discuss something with you. Do you have some time?”
“Of course. What do you need of me?” She inquired, head tilting slightly as she offered him her ear.
He gulped, his adam’s apple bobbing before he took a deep breath. She watched as he placed his pen to the side, sighing before finally gazing up at her again. 
“I wanted to have a serious conversation with you. Don’t worry, you haven’t done anything wrong.”
She laughed softly, his eyes nearly closing as he basked in her giggle. He’d only realized he had just treated her like he’d sometimes treat his own rangers, reassuring them whenever they hadn’t done anything worth receiving a scolding for.
“It’s okay Tighnari, I wasn’t worried. Please do speak your mind.”
“Right, well… It’s regarding these cycles I have.” He began, looking for any sign of discomfort as he spoke. He saw absolutely none, as well as no surprise on her face. She was calm, cool, collected, as well as supportive to listen to whatever he had to say. His heart jumped, mind racing as he wondered what the climax of this conversation would be. “Although your presence is very much welcomed and enjoyed, you’ve left just as my, erhm… Heat began, and returned right at the height of it.”
“O-Oh.” She hummed, a blush spreading across her face as she urged him to continue.
“During your absence…” He dragged out, before finally taking a deep breath and deciding to just lay all his cards on the table. “It’s been hell, I can’t lie. I’ve been prepared my whole life to deal with these cycles each time I don’t find a mate, but I can’t deny the bubbling feelings I’ve grown for you. At this point they’re not even feelings of a small crush, they’ve developed into full blown adoration. The issue is, as I’m sure you’re aware, I’m part fennec fox.”
Nevermind the utter leap her heart was doing, [F/N] was fully listening in to him. Despite the fireworks going off in her head for knowing her love was returned, she was still concerned for his predicament. She could only wonder how uncomfortable it had been for him, especially when knowing she was the root cause of this particular cycle. 
“While most hybrids don’t have to think of this particular deal with much seriousness, me on the other hand, have to consider that-”
“Fennec foxes mate for life.” She finished the sentence for him, a sheepish smile gracing her pretty face as she felt her thighs squish together. Her heart raced inside her chest, eyeing him directly as she remained as calm as she could. She could feel his stare glue on her, looking for any sign of disapproval before he’d continue.
“Yes…” He hummed, clearing his throat before looking at her again. “Well… I fully understand that this can be a dealbreaker though, so-”
“I love you too, Tighnari.” It was her turn to be blunt, her eyes finally unmasking the pure adoration she’d held for him during the whole time. They glistened with a spark he couldn’t quite place, catching him off guard before he found the strength to finally respond back.
“A-Are you certain?” He mumbled, causing her to giggle softly. His ears twitched to whatever sound she’d bless him with, tail wagging in a livelier manner as her eyes followed with endearment. “Don’t get me wrong, that… That makes me happier than what I can even describe, but I can’t stress enough how this is a huge commitment. Once I have confirmation, there will be a switch flipped in my brain to instantly consider you as my partner, forever.”
“I fully understand that, Tighnari.” She reassured him, nodding her head as if to further confirm it to him. “I wouldn’t allow myself to fall in love with you if I wasn’t ready to commit. I know how important this is to you, but I am ready. For everything.”
The last statement was, by itself, enough to flip his switch. [F/N] watched as his eyes dilated, slowly getting up from his chair before rounding up his table. Following suit she got up as well, ready to welcome him as she watched him visibly struggle to remain cordial despite what she could only assume were urges bubbling deep within his being. Unbeknownst to her however, the hair at the back of his neck stood, his movements growing slower as he approached who his mind now suffocatingly told him was his lover, his mate. She offered him a loving smile, accepting him with open arms as he hesitantly placed his hands on her hips, noting how they were… Wide. How she was breedable. His mind was running foggy, he had to control himself for a little longer.
“I… I’m sorry if I’m moving a little fast, [F/N].” He confessed, his eyebrows furrowing as his tone nearly turned into a whine. He jolted slightly upon feeling her hands resting against his chest, her voice humming in understanding.
“It’s okay Tighnari, I understand. Like I said… I’m ready for anything.” Her hand lifted to stroke his cheek, his knees nearly giving out as his grip against her waist grew stronger. It was her turn to gasp lightly, though remaining with a confident and loving smile. He watched as she bit her lower lip, his mind groaning over how he wished to bite it instead. “I want you to know I’m willing to do whatever you need done. Will you just… Please guide me through it beforehand?”
He frantically nodded his head, the black of his pupils nearly drowning the color of his eyes as he pulled her closer to himself. Her frame felt perfect against him, her fingers stroking against his cheek still as if enticing him to move forward. With a quiet promise to explain everything to her before anything was done, Tighnari sealed it with a kiss, nearly suffocating himself in the process as he drowned in love and lust. His lips felt hot against her own, a sigh of bliss leaving her as he took the lead, experimenting as his mind lost focus. Wanting to taste more of her, his tongue peeked through, carefully carving out her lips before parting them, seeking her very own as they began to waltz together. At first slow, it rapidly grew more frantic, his hands lowering as he encaged her against himself, his own muffled groans in sync with her quiet whimpers before hearing her babble his name almost incomprehensibly.
“Tigh… Mhm, Tighnahhh….ri…” She moaned softly, his ears shooting straight up as he finally leaned back, letting her breathe. Never minding the saliva on the corner of his mouth, he eyed her eagerly, listening to her attentively. “M-Maybe not here?...”
He was blushing furiously, already feeling excited under his pants. “R-Right, I’m sorry.” He practically groaned, his hands never roaming too far from her hips before he leaned closer, kissing the corner of her lips repeatedly and with fervor. “I’ll explain everything once… Think you can keep up?”
“Mhm…” She nodded her head, taking up his challenge as his lips continued attacking her mouth with desire. And amidst fleeting kisses and licks, he explained everything that would need to be done, seeking approval and consent before it quickly became dark. 
Her mind ran wild, heart nearly bursting out of her chest as she prepared for what was to come. After everyone had gone to rest, the two of them made haste deep into the forest, hands holding together as he guided her through. Despite knowing exactly how the ordeal was done, Tighnari himself had never done anything of the sort, only further fueling his eagerness to finally release this side of himself with the one he chose. Such was very clear with the way he held [F/N] close, murmuring to her the repeated plan whilst ensuring her he’d be as gentle as he could.
“Not scared of the dark, are you?” He pressed his chest against her back, bringing them both to a stop as his lips brushed against the crook of her neck. Against his hold her figure tensed, an excited grin on her face as she stroked his hands.
“No, don’t worry. With you it’ll be fine.” [F/N] hummed in response, shivering upon feeling his teeth brush against her exposed skin.
Tighnari was nearly trembling, though he bit himself back. He was close to finally getting what he needed, he only needed to hold on a little longer. His animalistic urges were bubbling from within at the mere thought of how it would all go down, it being the only reason he managed to finally release her from his embrace.
“Alright, dear. I’m giving you a minute to run ahead.” He explained, a cheeky tone hidden underneath the husky voice he spoke with. [F/N] turned around to gaze at him one last time before she were to follow through. “Be sure to not get hurt… One… Two… Three…”
Her eyes widened upon realizing he’d already begun counting. With a brief smile [F/N] ran, her panting being listened to even as she disappeared into the night. Tighnari couldn’t help the smile from forming on his face, his voice still echoing through the forest as he continued to count the time. His ears were straight up, twitching at any little sound he heard as he felt his heart racing. As he was coming close to finally counting down the minute, he could feel his mouth nearly salivating, the scent of her arousal reaching his nose. 
“And sixty… Alright alright my love, here I come~” He practically sang, moving slowly at first as if he stalked the area for any sounds. 
[F/N] could hear him approaching, biting her lip as she smiled for herself. She couldn’t deny just how excited she was, even if the ordeal hadn’t exactly been one she’d thought she’d find herself in. Honestly, that was all the more reason for her to feel eager for him. Still… She couldn’t cop out and make it end quicker. Despite being selfish with her own desires, she still understood the assignment of ensuring his needs were also met, even if such needs included a chase that led them into a small cave.
It lasted for a little longer than what [F/N] could’ve ever predicted. Honestly, she inwardly gave herself a pat on the back, being able to evade Tighnari for far longer than what she would've ever thought possible. Sure, it might’ve been easy for a fox hybrid like himself, but it was still a feat for someone as inexperienced in such a thing as herself. It was a little difficult to navigate the forest in the dark, her pace slowing down as she realized she was close to their final destination. Her hands moved to slightly loosen her own clothing, a small step to aid in the near future as they finally rendezvous on their little den. 
“Eager, are we?” [F/N]’s voice let out a sudden yelp, arms snaking around her as Tighnari had suddenly jumped from the shadows. His face nuzzled against her shoulder as he aided her in loosening her clothing further, the grin being practically felt against her skin as he peppered her with hungry kisses. “You did so well, love… I’m actually impressed.”
“And I’ll only get better… Next time around.” She huffed whilst trying to suppress her sighs of pleasure, feeling his hands roam against her figure as he shivered against her hold. Tighnari only hummed in approval, agreeing with her before turning her to face him.
“Of course. But for tonight, seems like I’ve successfully caught you…” He breathed out, clashing his lips against her own as they ruffled against one another. He could practically feel her smile against his lips, heart swelling as he inwardly praised the skies for such an understanding partner for his needs.
“Mhm… You have…” She mumbled, her own hands sneaking up on him to help him loosen his own outfit as well. “I’m all yours, dear. Why don’t you claim your prize for however long you wish, ‘Nari?”
He shivered in such a delightful way, she herself could feel it against her hold. It was dirty, the way she made it seem so… Primal. Yet it only fueled his fire more, his urges boiling to the surface before he dragged her off to the little den they’d painstakingly prepared beforehand.
“You’re so good for me… So good. Thank you.” His whines were honestly sickeningly sweet, a stark contrast from what [F/N] had thought he’d behave like. It was as though the normally level-headed Tighnari still wished to voice his thankfulness one final time before succumbing for the time being, wanting her to know just how much he appreciated her.
“Anything for my ‘Nari…” She mumbled back, feeling as the cool air hit her bare skin. 
He felt himself drooling, tongue slithering across her neck before going down her bare skin. The makeshift blanket with their pile of clothes served as a base for them to lie down, carefully trapping his lover against his hold before he pressed himself against her. [F/N] could feel his body hot, sweating against her own as her fingers stroked through his dark locks, sighing in lust as she felt his fangs experimentally bite her collarbone. 
“I can smell just how aroused you are…” He pointed out, licking his lips devilishly upon feeling her thighs squeeze shut. His hand lowered before gently prying them open, his body shifting downwards as he left a trail of kisses against her skin. “Don’t hide from me, love. Not only is it useless to… I could just- Get drunk off your scent.”
[F/N] shivered as glanced down at him, the lack of light only adding an extra layer of eagerness for the whole situation. Her other senses were heightened with the lack of light, jumping at every little touch he offered her as his eyes practically glowed back at her.
“Tigh… Tighnari…” She moaned quietly, still a little reserved, feeling his lips reach her inner thigh as his fingers carefully worked to fully undress her lower region. “I-It’s embarrassing~”
“Nonsense, you’re absolutely divine.” He hummed in delight, his eyes leaving her face to fully focus on her now exposed pussy. By that point he licked his lips in preparation, his hands firmly holding each thigh as he prepared himself to fully dive in. 
Like a starved man, Tighnari was quick to jump in and stop any possible questions his lover could have. Even though [F/N] was already naturally aroused by their situation, the idea of tasting her juices was enough to have him leaping for it, ignoring his own lust as he drowned himself in what he quickly came to realize was the best taste he’d ever tried. His tongue moved feverishly, but not without care for every corner of her pussy as his grasp against her squishy skin tightened. His ears remained straight as he listened to the delectable moans she provided for him, strings of praises mixed with incomprehensible babbles leaving her lips as her back arched naturally with the pleasure he provided. Tighnari could quite possibly come undone then and there were he not to stop rutting himself against the floor, his hardened bulge painfully reminding him that he needed some attention to. His tongue swirled upwards to her clit, paying extra attention as he both kissed and nibbled on it, as if the researcher experimented on any little reaction his dearest provided him.
“N.. Agh… ‘Nari! That feels so good,” she heaved amidst moans, one hand lowering before grabbing a hold of his hair, careful as to not tug too hard. It was his turn to groan, a guttural sound that vibrated against her needy hole, leaking in neediness of him as it only further enticed him for more.
“More, I need more,” he huffed against her pussy, licking up any juices she offered him as if it were divine nectar he’d been blessed with. 
Even against his hold, her thighs squished around his head, trapping him into a situation he couldn’t possibly complain about. His nails dug slightly into her skin, [F/N] swearing she could hear her lover growl under his breath in what she could only assume was pleasure from the ordeal. Having never considered Tighnari would actually become pussydrunk, it was a pleasant surprise to say the least. 
“You’re so wet, so so wet my lovely [F/N]...” He purred, all the while still giving all his attention to her pussy, an experimental pump of two fingers enticing a louder moan that had the hairs at the back of his neck stand. He couldn’t wait himself, the sensation of her tight hole around his throbbing cock would absolutely derail him, he just knew it. The way her tight walls sucked his fingers in desperation was enough to have him shivering, pumping them deeper as he listened to her finally whining out her request.
“‘Nari… I can’t wait any longer!” His [F/N] moaned, pulling his head up by his hairs to watch his glowing eyes land straight to her blushing face. His expression darkening with desire, he slowly lifted himself up, her juices staining the lower part of his face as he licked his fingers clean.
“Is that so? Then tell me, what exactly do you want to interrupt me in such a way.” He hummed, tail wagging as if expecting a final confirmation before the prize was finally claimed.
With her arms wrapping around his shoulders, she pulled him close, eyes pleading by themselves before she whined. “Please Tighnari, fuck me real good. I want you to fill me up, to breed me!”
Although it was the dead of night, his eyes widened, the fox hybrid nearly choking on his spit as he was evidently caught off guard. Not exactly expecting her to use such filthy language, Tighnari quickly removed his undergarments before finally freeing his cock, pumping it eagerly while [F/N] spread her legs nice and wide for him.
“You’re such a dirty girl… But I ‘spose I should reward you for being so honest with me.”
“Mhm, please?” She pleaded, a groan leaving his throat before his lips latched onto her own. 
With both in position, Tighnari aligned himself before finally pushing his tip in, his eyes closing shut as he lowly moaned against her neck. Her tight walls sucked him in, welcoming his throbbing cock with open arms as if begging for him to fuck her into his shape. He felt her legs locking around his hips, her body jolting under him as her nails clawed at his back slightly.
“S-Shit… You’re so tight.” He sighed out, sharp teeth brushing against her still unmarked skin. His free hand roamed up, fingers slithering across one of her breasts before latching onto it. “So good, baby. You feel so good, taking me in nice and easy.”
“‘Nari, you’re so big…” She yelped, her walls stretching to accommodate him as her natural arousal coated his cock. The slight pain would periodically subside as he attempted to not wildly thrust into her, his hips battling against his brain as he gave her a moment to adjust to his sudden insertion.
His lips lowered to her chest, a trail of kisses leading up to her tit before his mouth latched onto her nipple. Sucking while gently nibbling on it, Tighnari began to slowly thrust, attempting to focus himself on maintaining a steady rhythm before he’d lose control. The way her velvety walls wrapped around him so nicely had him seeing stars, the high clouding his vision as he groaned in a sinful manner that only further helped arouse [F/N].
“Harder, Tighnari… Please, please fuck me harder!” She moaned, pleading with him as she held him tighter. 
His grasp on her tightened, finally letting himself go as his hips rolled quicker, faster, harder. This had his mate moan his name out like a sacred prayer, their lewd sounds echoing around them as his cock became coated with their own desire. Tighnari bit and nibbled all over her chest, moaning how good she felt around him all the while, how she was his, how much he loved her. His teeth left many love bites around her skin, the researcher grinning to himself whenever he felt her hole clench a little tighter around him with each hickey.
“I’m going to fill you up, love. You just wait, you’ll be so full of my cum, so full of it, oh I can’t wait…” He lifted his head before lunging at her lips, swallowing her moans as the tears pricked the corners of her eyes. 
[F/N] could swear she was seeing white, eyes rolling back as his tongue rubbed against her own, his dick being able to reach deeper and deeper and hitting all the right spots. Her grasp on him weapened, jolting at every time Tighnari thrusted forward before nearly emptying her pussy and ramming back in. It was so sinful, so lustful, so good. He fucked so good, she couldn’t even stop the babbling moans from leaving her throat as he fucked her tongue with his own. His pace increased, yet Tighnari held on, cock throbbing but still not quite close to cumming, saving all of his load to coat her insides in sticky ropes of white and claiming her for the first time of the night. 
“You want that don’t you? For me to breed you nice and good?” He lifted his head, the string of saliva falling down and sticking to her jawline as she moaned in response, his grin never leaving his face as he continued to fuck her faster. “You’ll be a wonderful mom, oh I’m sure of it, I’ll make sure by tomorrow you’re stuffed full of cum that you’ll surely be pregnant with my pups.”
“Mhm, Tighnari!” [F/N] cried out, trying to pull him back to kiss him more, instead only receiving kitten licks across her lips as his hips continued to thrust into her aching hole.
“I can’t wait… I can’t wait, fuck [F/N], you’ll look so pretty once I fill you up.” Tighnari’s hand lowered to rest on top of her belly, his heart racing as he thought of his beloved fully bred. His back shivered at the image, his pre already mixing with her juices as he imagined her pretty hole filled to the brim.
“Ah, ‘Nari, you feel so good~ I’m so close, ahnn~” 
“Are you cumming love? Then do it, right around my cock, do it, I want to fuck you through your first release.” 
Tighnari watched attentively, focusing for a sole moment as her face twisted, lips parting as her pussy clenched around him one final time. His ears were graced with the most delightful of moans, hole spasming around him wildly as it all threatened to overwhelm his own high. He groaned in response, hips still thrusting through it as he engraved her expression in his mind. She looked so fucked out, and yet one single round wouldn’t satisfy him in the slightest.
“You look, so, gorgeous,” He breathed out quickly, finally latching onto her lips once more as his own pace grew wild and unpredictable. His arms rested against the ground, holding himself up as he pressed harder against her sweating body, grinding against her as he chased his own high against her now overstimulated pussy.
“Ah, Tighnari, that’s-!” [F/N] moaned loudly, arch backing deliciously against himself as her tits squished against his chest. His teeth nibbled on her puffy lower lip, growling as he felt his cock throbbing harder, signaling he was close.
“I’m going to cum, [F/N], here comes your first prize for being such a good girl,” He huffed, grinning wildly before he moaned her name lowly, one final thrust into her abused hole kissing her on her deepest part before finally dumping his fat load deep into her.
Nails digging into his back, she moaned in pure bliss, body trembling at the mere sensation of her pussy being utterly filled to the brim. To her surprise, Tighnari continued to pump into her, fucking her through his own release as his cum coated every single corner of her hole until there was no space left. He felt his head lower against her neck before finally breathing heavily, slowly pulling out before lifting himself up to watch the scene before him.
With hearts in her eyes, [F/N] eyed him with a blissful expression, arms extended out to him as if whining for him to come back to her arms. Her legs remained apart, his cum now leaking from her as her hole protested the sudden disappearance of his dick. Her chest was sprinkled with love bites, body glistening and sweating as her hair was disheveled from their first round of many. 
“N…. Ah.. ‘Nari?” She whispered, face blushing upon gazing how he stroked himself, pumping his hardening dick vigorously as he savored the view. She felt her mouth go dry, the sudden wonder of how his cock would feel fucking her throat running through her mind. “A-Ah~”
“No wasting any seed, now…” He purred, fingers sliding easily back inside her hole before fingering his cum back into her pussy. The sound their mess made was quickly becoming one of his favorites, still rubbing himself while he studied over how sensitive she was. “This won’t do… A single round won’t be enough to ensure you’re well bred, don’t you think baby?”
“H-Huh?” She blushed furiously, feeling his weight press against her once more, aligning against her entrance yet again as his dark gaze landed right on her.
“One more time, love… One more, can you take it? Please?” He outright pleaded, promising it would only be one more, just to ensure. 
It never was just one more time, Tighnari fucking her well into the sunrise, more and more addicted to how she felt around him, as well as the image of her every hole leaking his seed.
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