#so made edits on the phone for the first time at 4 am which i think you can tell lol

[stood-onthecliffside]

the grudge

[dnpbeats]

(Almost Solid) Proof That Dan Ran PhilsLion

I'm convinced that Dan was the person who ran the PhilsLion twit and I have receipts.  For anyone who doesn't know, PhilsLion is a twitter account that tweeted from the POV of Lion. It's commonly thought that this account was run by Phil. Besides the fact that he would interact with the account, there are multiple tweets that seem to be about him and dan. Unfortunately there's good reason to believe it wasn't Phil running it. HOWEVER there are many reasons that lead me to believe it was Dan who was tweeting from it, some of which is evidence based and some of which makes logical sense.

DISCLAIMER: All tweets I've included that are ostensibly about dan and phil's relationship are in reference to things that are confirmed by d&p themselves (e.g. the fact that d&p were romantically involved when they first met). I will not discuss anything that is not supposed to be public knowledge.

First let's look at when the Twitter was created. (Note: I am in UTC-8 so all screenshots will be in that time zone. I will say what time it would've been in UTC+0 (d&p's time zone) for clarity.)

Dan’s twitter account was created in May 2009. The first tweet from him (assuming he did not delete any older ones) was May 15 at 1:18pm. Presumably this is the day he got twitter.

On May 16 2009 at 3:19am Phil tweeted that he uploaded “I was kidnapped.” 

In this video he mentions his own personal twitter account, and there is an annotation of Lion saying “i want a twitter” (20sec into the video)

About 3 hours after the video was posted (6:26am UTC+0), we get the first tweet from PhilsLion (presumably this was right after the account was created)

May 16th 2009 was a Saturday. We know from Dan’s video “THE POWER NAP” that he worked at ASDA on Saturdays and Sundays from 5am-10am. So he would’ve been awake shortly after Phil posted the video. Also note that Dan presumably had an iPhone at the time (he tweeted something about iPhones in June 2009 and had no previous tweets before that about getting a new phone). He specifically tweeted in Sep 2009 about tweeting from his iPhone. Based on the fact that Dan literally showed up to work drunk and took a nap, I don’t think he is above going on twitter at work.

While this is not proof that Dan created the account, we can see that it’s definitely possible for him to have created the account. We know he would’ve been awake at the time the account was created, and it was approx. a day after he created his own twitter account, so making a twitter account would've been fresh in his mind.

We do have proof that Phil did not create the account. First, he edited the description of “I was kidnapped.” to say that someone [else] created PhilsLion:

He also tweeted May 16th (10:35am UTC+0 if that matters to anyone) basically saying the same thing as the video desc, implying that someone else made the account:

Finally in “AmazingJason” (posted May 26th) he mentions, again, “someone [else]” creating the Twitter account (about 20seconds in, the timestamp is linked). He encourages everyone to follow it and links it in the description of the video:

So unless Phil was really pushing that someone else created it even though he himself made it, it wasn’t him.

If you want to skip to Proof™ scroll down to the next photo of Phil. Before that, I’d like to debunk the 11:11/different time zone thing–I think this is the biggest reason people have claimed that the account was not run by Phil or Dan but rather some other random fan. On May 30th at 4:12pm UTC+0 and June 3rd at 4:19am UTC+0, PhilsLion tweeted about making wishes at 11:11. In order for these tweets to be made at ~11:11 local time, they would need to have been made in either UTC-5 or UTC+7. UTC-5 is US Eastern Time. UTC+7 is a time zone mainly consisting of Southeast Asia. This includes parts of Indonesia, Cambodia, Laos, Thailand, and Vietnam. I have an explanation for this, which is certainly the biggest reach of this whole thing, but it is a plausible explanation :p

It’s very possible that it was Dan who tweeted this if he was on vacation with his family at the time. We know Dan and his family have vacationed in Asia many times (at the very least they went to Thailand in 2006, India in 2010 and 2013, and Sri Lanka in 2016). So while there’s no proof (that I know of) that Dan was on vacation at this time, it’s certainly possible that he was. The location of the tweets would fit with where we know his family likes to go on holiday. Additionally, the second tweet talks about water skiing, which tends to be a fun vacation thing rather than something people do regularly (note this tweet would be at 11:19am in UTC+7)

There’s further proof that PhilsLion was not always in UTC+7. On Christmas 2009, PhilsLion tweeted “goodmorning” at 6:21am UTC+0. This would be 1:21pm in UTC+7. It makes a lot more sense for this to have been tweeted in England.

Then fast forward to January 8th 2011. PhilsLion tweets “I was up all night” at 8:05am UTC+0. This would be 3pm in UTC+7. So again, it seems that PhilsLion was not in UTC+7 at this time.

Okay, now onto much more solid evidence. First, the handwriting of PhilsLion. This is the most tangible piece of proof. On June 25th 2009 Phil posted “AmazingAlex,” where Lion can be seen behind him in one of Phil’s shoes:

Lion tweeted a photo the next day, saying “I’m on a boat :)” in reference to being in Phil’s shoe

Note that the drawing/writing does not appear in the video and therefore was done by whoever runs PhilsLion. Here is some of Dan’s writing (found in TABINOF) for comparison:

This is from the “how to draw cat whiskers” page. Notice how the As all have the crossbar quite high up, just like in the twitter picture. Additionally, the top loops in the Bs are all very skinny compared to the bottom loop. Here’s another one of Dan’s capital Bs from the blindfolded portrait page, which is similar to Lion's writing:

I’m not a handwriting analysis expert, and yes it’s different drawing on MSPaint vs. a piece of paper, but the handwriting certainly has similarities.

And now, the more circumstantial evidence, but things that seem (imo) to be too big of a coincidence to not have been written by Dan (FYI these are going to be added in order of how much of a reach they are, not chronological order, lol). First we have “I month you”:

This tweet is proposing an alternate word for “love” and ends with “I month you” (i.e. is replacing the word love with month), and was tweeted on November 19th 2009. AKA exactly a month after dan and phil met IRL for the first time.

Another one that seems very related to Dan and what we know of his situation is this tweet about “Lion’s” dad:

In Dan’s own words in BIG: “I didn’t think I could ask my family for help or share my feelings about this, mainly due to my dad. Funny guy, kind of a woke hippie who did and said a lot of things I did respect but at the same time used to walk around the house saying how he hoped someone he had a problem with at work would 'die of bum cancer.' Yep, so picked the one area to be a bigot that would further traumatize your child. Nice! This experience coming from a childhood hearing the word gay meaninglessly thrown around as an insult at home[.]” 

Note that Dan was still living at home at the time, so if this tweet was made by him, it wouldn't have meant literally “getting away.” Also, Dan was at home when this was tweeted but it was 3 days before he was going to see Phil.

Next there’s this tweet:

The “admirers” thing could be referring to anything really, but was tweeted during the time that Dan (and Phil) were in the Clipstar video contest. Also, Dan posted this dailybooth two days before this tweet, and most of the comments are just gassing him up, so lol (the pic doesn’t load but based on the comments I think it was a screenshot from his clipstar vid).

This tweet from Christmas Eve 2009. Dan and Phil were together and filming the interactive Christmas adventure:

Proof they were together if anyone needs it:

This tweet (tweeted November 26 5:45am UTC+0)

Many things to note here. The song linked is called “When I See You Again.” It’s by Dave Bullas (one of the founders of SiTC), whom d&p were/are friends with. (They had other friends who were friends with him as well. PJ has the top comment on the video.) The lyrics of the song are not really happy as they insinuate a breakup. But it’s interesting to think about them in the context of wanting to see someone who you are not able to. This tweet was 3/4 days after the “I wonder how biology…” tweet and 3 days before Dan went to see Phil.

Also, Dan just LOVES recommending music to people. He does it a lot.

(^ Proof Dan was seeing Phil on the 29th if anyone needs it)

Now a tweet exchange which doesn't technically prove anything, but I thought was curious. Phil tweeted December 29 2010 about getting a new camera:

Lion tweeted in reference to this 20 minutes later:

I find this interesting because Phil made no comment anywhere about manuals or ignoring them. So it could just be PhilsLion making schput, but a lot of the other Lion tweets are in direct reference to something Phil said/did. It would make sense if Dan ran the twitter acc and he was talking about something that he witnessed Phil do that we don’t know about. Also note “my new camera is here” vs. “phil picked up his new camera” (Lion giving more specific detail than Phil in terms of the manner in which he obtained the camera).

Some Tweets (1, 2, 3) which aren’t proof of anything but just sound like things Dan would say:

For context, this is about floods that happened in Queensland. Again, I have no way to prove Dan said this. But if you’ve ever read, like, anything Dan has said in a print interview ever or watched any of his liveshows, you know that he often tries to say stuff with superfluous/pretentious language and then ends up not making a whole lot of sense. Things that he’s said have been misconstrued so many times, or just outright don’t make sense to anyone but him. So this series of tweets checks out, if it is Dan who ran the account.

This Twitter exchange which doesn’t actually prove anything but is very sweet if it is dan who tweeted it:

The photo is a screenshot from “AmazingJason”:

Note that two weeks later (October 23) in “Life without the internet!?” Phil says the internet led to him “meeting the best friend of [his] life.” The comments all assume he is referencing Dan, but in the video he holds up Lion, so presumably that’s actually who he’s talking about. That is, unless Lion represents Dan :p

Lastly, this tweet which is a Fall Out Boy lyric, but again would be cute if it was Dan:

There's a few more tweets that are interesting to think about being from Dan but don't actually prove anything so I won't put them here lol.

So, at the end of the day, could it be some random fan* who made the twitter account? Yes. But in my opinion there isn’t really anything proving it’s not Dan. On top of that, there are enough things that fit with what we know factually about d&p now, but were not well known at the time, that make it seem much more likely that Dan ran this account vs. a random person.

*technically when the account was started, Dan himself was a random fan. So there’s that too ;)

P.S. best practice is to not interact with old tweets, so pls don't go on a retweet spree

[keys-hellscape-1020]

4 times you meet Red Robin, 1 time you meet Tim Drake

A/N: Sorry for disappearing these last few months. I’m not dead but I am in a serious depressive episode and you know what that means. Time to write.

Content warnings: Angst, Kidnapping, reader dissociates, they don’t get along at first, eventual fluff, this is my first time writing for Tim sorry if he’s OOC, uhhh cursing probably, let me know if I missed anything

Soulmate!Tim Drake x Soulmate!gn!Reader

————

1.

From your seat on the frosty park bench you watch the thin red thread bob in the winter wind, lit only by the pale light that is filtering down from the streetlight above you. You watch the string dance with mild interest, jerking your pinky at random intervals to make it flutter one way or another. No matter which way it sways however, you know where it will always lead. To your soulmate.

His name is Red Robin, or in other words, Tim Drake. One of the richest men in Gotham who just so happens to also be a crime fighting vigilante. A closely guarded secret that you only know thanks to a subtle design flaw in the universe. Television.

Ever since the third Robin made his first official appearance you knew. You could see the red strand trailing off his pinky, and, upon asking your father, discovered it was only you who could see it. It was at that moment, all of 14 years old, that you unofficially met your soulmate. It was at that moment, that your life was permanently altered, for better or worse.

At first, your stomach kicked in excitement. Your soulmate was a vigilante! You simply couldn’t belive your luck. You scoured the internet for any information on him, becoming one of his biggest fans in a matter of hours.

Your obsession lasted all of a few months. It came to a screeching halt when a photo of Robin kissing Spoiler was leaked. You felt your heart break, the pieces jumping up into your throat to choke you on your own disappointment and sadness.

The worst part? You knew you had no right to feel the way you did. Robin had no clue you even existed. His soulmate could be half way across the world and it become clear to you that he wasn’t intent on finding them. On finding you.

In that moment of heartbreak and spite you made a choice that would follow you for years to come. If Robin didn’t want to find you, you didn’t want to find Robin.

It wasn’t until several years later, when you were watching a broadcast of a Wayne gala out of sheer desperation to cure your crippling boredom that you first laid eyes on Tim Drake.

You sat in bored silence, letting the stream playing on your computer become background noise as you mindlessly scrolled through your phone, when suddenly an interview playing on your computer catches your attention. A man in a sleek suit with a face that you’re sure you’ve seen on tiktok before is leaning next to a man that you only recognize thanks to the name edited over the video for the sake of the viewers. Tim Drake, isn’t that guy a millionaire or something?

Pulling your attention back to the video, the interviewer is questioning him at record speed and Drake, for his credit, looks entirely unbothered. If it weren’t for the quickly concealed circles under his eyes and the way he periodically glances over his shoulder with a glazed over look, you might even say he’s enjoying the night.

As you watch Drake be interviewed, a dancing red string in the background catches your eye, stealing your breath. You watch it flitter in the background behind Drake’s head, almost as if it’s teasing you, daring you to do something with the information you now posses. You watch as Drake goes to tuck a piece of hair behind his ear, the small knotted string on his pinky finger unknowingly showing you the identity of Red Robin. It crossed your mind for a half second that they may be different people, but a quick google search reinforced what you already knew. Two different soulmates produced two different strings. You very clearly only had one.

You had laid awake all night, wondering if this changed anything, questioning if you should do something with this information. You couldn’t tell anyone, you knew that for certain. That might put him in danger and despite not even knowing the man personally, despite every fraction of your heart telling you to hurt him in anyway you could for what he’d done to you, you knew that you couldn’t live with yourself if he came to harm because of you.

And so, you bit your tongue, swallowed the ever burning desire to track down your soulmate, if only to scream in his face, and continued on with your life. Whenever the urge to track him down reared its ugly head you reminded yourself of the many photos you’d seen of him kissing someone, someone much more attractive than you. Someone who can keep up with him. Someone better. Why in the world would he want you?

The months after you found out Red Robin’s identity flew by, and despite having come to terms with it months ago, tonight you couldn’t sleep. Your room seemed to suffocate you, urging you to get some fresh air, the window of your room proving insufficient even when you stuck your whole torso out of it. It was at this point that you decided to go out, nighttime in Gotham be damned. You’d lived here your entire life, you could deal with a few muggers. And so you wrapped yourself up in a thick winter jacket over your pjs, complete with a scarf and gloves, making sure to slip some pepper spray into your pocket, where it would be easily accessible should you need it.

Nighttime in Gotham can be strangely peaceful at times, large buildings cast dark shadows which are only illuminated by weak streetlights, and depending on where you are in the city it can even be something close to quiet. You walk slowly, your boots crunching through the thin layer of ice and snow, as you navigate your way to the park.

The cold air feels nice on your face as you sit on a park bench, watching your string. Your head leaning against the back on the bench, taking in the sight of unlit buildings around you. After several minutes of sitting there in silence you finally decide to stand, a strange tingle on the back of your neck seeming to urge you towards home.

It’s only when you begin to turn that you notice the man behind you.

Before you can even register what’s going on you’ve switched the safety lock of your pepper spray and are spraying it directly into the eyes of the man with a shriek of fear.

You’re to stunned to speak as you shuffle back as quickly as possible, tripping over yourself in your panic, leaving you on your back, your pepper spray the last line of defense between you and… Red Robin? You let out a pathetic whimper of shock, which at any other moment would’ve left you horribly embarrassed but right now you’re too confused to feel anything else.

He lets out a muffled “Shit!” As he wipes at his face with the back of his glove. You stand and reflexively hand him a tissue from your pocket.

“S-Sorry.” You stutter out, watching the string cautiously float between you two in shock.

He gratefully takes the tissues and wipes his face with it, “Ah, it’s okay. The mask got most of it, just startled me was all.” He says tiredly, flashing you a weary half smile that has you feeling unfortunately weak in the knees.

“I uh-“ you find yourself at an unfortunate loss for words as you stumble through what you should say, fantasies of what you would do when you finally got the chance to meet this man face to face fleeing your mind in an instant now they you were actually in the moment.

“Are you okay?” He asks, blotted out eyes staring at you in what seems to be concern.

“Y-yeah… yeah uh… sorry I thought you were gonna try and kidnap me or something…” you said awkwardly, suddenly finding the ground very interesting as a sense of painfully strong embarrassment rushes through you.

“I knew I shouldn’t have approached you from behind.” He mutters quietly, more to himself than anything else.

“You were watching me?” You ask, creasing your eyebrows at him in concern. A hot spark of fury snaps to life in your chest. First this man breaks your heart, and then he decides to stalk you?

You swear you see him flush bright red underneath his mask. “No- no! Well, uh, actually yes- but not like that!” He stumbles through his words. “I just uh, thought you might be hurt or something, and then I uh- I saw your string and well I just thought I should say something.” He trails off awkwardly.

“Well then, what did you want to say?” You ask him, the spark of anger growing, fueled by all the painful memories that you’d acquired through the years.

“O-oh.” He looks genuinely startled for a moment at your outburst, and you would’ve felt bad had all the memories of how it felt to have to watch your soulmate flourish without you, how painful it was, not flashed through your mind.

“Well I honestly didn’t think that far ahead.” He says softly, almost shyly, as he looks at his feet and you hate how his cuteness causes butterflies to churn in your stomach. You let out a low hum as you consider your options, doing your best to ignore how adorable he looks as he glances at you and fidgets with his gloves.

“I’ve known.” You say calmly, calculatedly. If you played your cards right you could cause him a lot more pain than yelling at him ever would.

He looks up at you, a hit of confusion and concern in his voice. “Known what?” He asks.

“Tim Drake and Red Robin have one very striking similarity.” You say calmly, taking a few steps down the road that would eventually lead you home. You look back to see if he’s following and sure enough he is. You wag your pinkie at him in response.

“Ah.” He says simply, his shoulders tending.

“Relax, I’ve known for months. If I was gonna tell anyone I would’ve.” You say curtly as you begin walking home once more.

“How did you find out? Why bring it up now?” He phrases his questions as just that, questions, but you know that if you fail to answer truthfully he’ll find out quicker than you could blink. You’d looked into him over the years.

“T.V.” You say simply. “String showed up on it. As for why I brought it up, as of a few months ago Tim Drake hard launched his relationship with Bernard Dowd on Instagram. I’d be willing to bet money that the relationship had been going on for a while before that. That’d put you at dating for what, about 8 months now?” You look at him for false confirmation, you know you’re right. His shoulders are tense and you’re sure you’re receiving a scalding glare from behind his mask. You can’t help but grin in satisfaction. It’s seems your research paid off.

You see your apartment complex off in the distance and turn to face him once more. “This is all to say, you’re dating someone. What’s the real reason you approached me? Troubles in paradise?” You hum, you know you’re being nothing short of cruel right now but after watching this man completely disregard you, not care, or maybe just not realize that his soulmate would have to watch him live life without a care in the world for them, well you couldn’t help but think it was deserved.

He grinds his jaw as he looks at you. “We broke up. Not that it’s any of your business.”

“Ahh so you intended to have me be a rebound then?” You snort and look him up and down. In all your years of watching him live life without you you’d never seen him look so tense. “Well as lovely as this was, I have to wake up early tomorrow. Nice talkin’ to you bird boy.” You turn around and start walking into your apartment building. You glance behind you and see Red Robin standing where you left him, staring at you, his jaw locked tight and his mouth downtrodden in a frown. You can’t help but feel a spark of well earned satisfaction at the sight.

————

2.

You really thought chewing him out would make you feel better. You truly did. Instead all it did was make you feel guilty. You can’t even pin-point the cause of the guilt churning in your stomach, making you feel all the worse. You almost wish that he’d announce another relationship so you could feel justified. On the other hand seeing article on article about his newest love might finally drive you to the brink of insanity. Assuming you could still call yourself sane at this point.

Every night after dusk when you leave to do absolutely anything, you can see a shadow of a figure following you around. You’re sure it’s Drake, it has to be. You’ve studied videos of him and other Robins, compared and contrasted, you know how every one of those vigilantes move compared to each other and there’s only one who has the minor tells you keep seeing out of the corner of your eyes.

Red Robin. The string leading right to him just confirms your theory. He must think it’s not worth the effort to hide himself, the string would give him away no matter what. So instead he’s making sure that whenever you leave the safety of your home you know he’s there. You pour over why in your mind, you even consider the idea that he’s protecting you but in the end even just thinking the idea cause a spark of humor in you. No he must have some other motivation, perhaps making sure you know he has the upper hand? Perhaps showcasing that you can’t hide from him?

Whatever the reason, you’re sure that you’ll find out soon. He’s been getting gradually closer over the last week and a half he’s been following you. Tonight he’s been less than half a block away at all times. Every moment that you’ve been walking to and from the convince store you’ve noticed the shadow.

You’ve never been more terrified in your life.

You know you have no real reason to be. You know that he can’t wound you or bring you into the police. He has no reason and you haven’t given him anything to frame you with, at least, not to your knowledge. That’ll have to be your only comfort for now.

The subject of your fears is about to be confronted as you purposefully turn into an alleyway that you commonly avoid during the night, just as you excepted, the moment you’re half way in you hear the soft sound of feet landing behind you. You’re certain it’s only a pleasantry.

You steel your nerves as much as possible as you turn to face Red Robin. He’s looking at you with a dark expression that you can’t quite place, it causes a drumming of unease in your stomach and you can feel your heartbeat picking up in your chest. You wring your hands together tightly before crossing them over your chest.

“Can I help you.” You ask coldly, keeping your voice low.

“I wanted to talk.” He says calmly, approaching you carefully, calculatedly.

For every step he takes you take two back, and he quickly gets the message and stops approaching. He holds out his hands as if approaching a scared animal. “I think we got off on the wrong foot.”

You can’t help a short, sour, laugh from rising in you. “We got off on the wrong foot years ago when I had to watch you pretend I didn’t exist.” You grit out from inbetween your teeth. “When I had to watch you fuck around in those relationships.” A tiny voice in the back of your mind screeches that you’re being stupid. Melodramatic. That nows your chance to get to know him. You ignore it. “We got off on the wrong foot when I told you to fuck off and you took it as an invitation to stalk me for a week and half!” You‘re getting angrier and angrier, hiding your unease and sadness behind a thick later of rage, as you had for years now.

You’re pacing, back and forth, back and forth, walking on an invisible tightrope before him, trying to calm yourself, to think rationally. It seems that Drake’s very presence however limits your ability to do so. You scratch at the nape of your neck, trying to center yourself.

His eyes widen in shock, as if he hadn’t even thought of the possibility that you’ve know he was your soulmate for years. He shakes the shock off much quicker than you’d like before he speaks. “I wasn’t stalking you-“ he begins, holding his hand out as a sign of peace. “I wanted to say something, I just didn’t know what.”

“So you decided following me around was the best course of action.” You say with a scoff.

He unconsciously copies your body language and rubs the nape of his neck. “Well, I started off on my patrol route and then I got… distracted.”

You fix him with an un-impressed stare. “You got distracted so you decided to stalk me?” You deadpan.

He tightens his fists in agitation, scoffing at you. “Well maybe if you weren’t walking around Gotham at night I wouldn’t have to keep you from getting kidnapped!”

You throw up your hands in poorly-contained anger, approaching him to jam a finger into his chest. “I’ve done fine without you up to this point! I hardly need your help.” You seethe.

He grits his teeth, holding eye contact with you from behind his mask. If you didn’t know better you would say that you saw a flash of regret on his face. “Fine then. Have fun fighting off muggers.” He practically growls as he pulls out his grappling gun and disappears into the night with a gust of cold air.

You start walking back, much more content now that there’s no strange shadow following you. As you drift off to bed that following night however you can’t help but feel a dash of regret.

————

3.

You’re regretting telling Drake to leave you alone.

You’re really really regretting it.

You watch the group of large men discuss you in hushed voices on the other side of the room, all of them dressed in black. You’d been brought into a small room of what you think is the office of a warehouse. After all, this variety of common criminal are never original with their plans.

You stretch and pull against your binds, trying to find any weakness in them, you grind your teeth in frustration when you fail to find any. One of them notices your twitching and after muttering something to the rest of the group approaches you. You watch, doing your best to conceal your fear, as the rest of the men leave the room.

The man crouches in front of you, balaclava covering everything but his eyes as he analyzes you.

“What do you want.” You spit out, attempting to kick him with your bound feet. The man easily swats them to the side, huffing at you in irritation. “Your soulmate is Red Robin.” He doesn’t phase it as a question, but an objective fact, making your stomach twist anxiously.

“Why the fuck would you think that.” You growl out, baring your teeth at him, doing your best to use your anger to mask your true feelings.

A series of bangs and shouts interrupts you from outside the room, causing the man to stand and turn quickly. He stands in front of you, staring at the door a while before he turns to face you, giving you a look that you roughly decipher as his best attempt at telling you “I told you so”. He pulls you up roughly, wrapping an arm around your shoulder and shoving a gun to the side of your head, making you wince silently.

He tugs the both of you into the corner that’s immediately visible from the door way. It feels like an eternity of standing there, trying to maintain a balance of getting as far from the man as his arm wrapped around you will allow while not pissing him off enough that he decides to use the gun. In actuality only 2 or 3 minutes pass as you listen to the sounds of fighting that echo outside the door. Despite your expectation of it, you still violently flinch when the door slams open, a painfully loud crack filling the room.

Drake looks frantic, he’s covered in dust and his Bo staff is sticky with a dark substance that you can only surmise is blood. He barely glances at you, eyes finding the gun that your kidnapper presses into your skull before his eyes trail up to the man holding you.

He holds out a hand, other gripping his staff tightly, and you can’t help but remember your last meeting. “Let them go.” He says firmly, like his trying to will the man’s action with only his voice.

From where the man holds you against his chest you can feel him shake with fear, but how did he think this would go? His friends would get the drop on Red Robin? Yeah right. You silently hope that Drake finds a way to get you out of this soon.

“Let. Them. Go.” Drake says again, approaching slowly. You can see his fingers shifting on his staff, attempting to feel out the man’s next move. “There’s no way you get out of this. So let them go and you can get off easier.”

Apparently he didn’t enjoy the sound of that as he throws you to the ground, points his gun, and fires. Drake’s mind and body are both quicker than any reflex this man might have however as he ducks under the bullets with ease, knocking the gun out of hands with a practiced flow.

You don’t see what happens next, and you don’t want to. All you see as you pull yourself into a corner are the scrapes on your hands from where you caught yourself. You bury your head in your knees and try to fuse into the corner. You don’t want to be here. You want to be able to pretend this entire situation doesn’t bother you. You want your soulmate to be anyone other than the vigilante across the room from you right now who’s beating a man to a bloody pulp.

Time doesn’t seem real, you don’t seem real as you stand in the doorway, watching yourself struggle to breath in that corner. You don’t know when you reentered your body but you know that Drake is in front of you, blood on his knuckles and dotting his face as he frantically unties you.

You struggle to breath and Drake presses his palm to your cheek, you flinch at the feeling of a sticky fluid meeting your skin. “Hey, hey it’s okay. You’re okay now.”

Your soul acts ahead of your mind and you press you face into his chest with a sob, you feel him physically startle for a moment, before he slowly and tentatively wraps his arms around you. “I’m sorry.” You choke out between cries, digging your finger into the fabric on his back. “I’m so sorry.”

You’re sure that in a day or two the memory of this will embarrass you, but for now his arms wrap around you and squeeze firmly, centering you in the here and now as he mummers comforts into your ear.

And for now, that’s all you need.

————

4.

It’s been almost a month since you were kidnapped, and then rescued by Red Robin. Your parents had begged you to come home and recover with them, but you had turned them down every time they asked. Under other circumstances you would’ve agreed in a heartbeat, but your apartment had something that their’s lacked. Red Robin. The man who saved you that night, and your soulmate.

Every night following your capture he’d come to visit. As he handed you off to the police he’d promised he’d keep an eye on you, and it seemed he intended to follow through on that promise, as for the last four weeks, like clockwork, you’d awaken to a soft tapping on your window, opening it to Red Robin.

The first few nights he’d simply crouched on your windowsill and exchanged a few short words with you, turning down your offers of bandaging his wounds or a glass of water before he was disappearing into the night as silently as he came. It took you nearly a week before you managed to convince him to come inside for the first time.

You had to practically beg him to come in, promising over and over that it wasn’t any trouble and you were sure that you didn’t mind. You’d never been so happy Gotham’s rent was cheap enough for you to live without a roommate so you didn’t have to explain to someone why Red Robin was in your apartment at 4 am. It took a while for the both of you to warm up to one another, especially after the rough start you’d had, but once you two actually had a conversation without gritting your teeth at each other you found you had more in common than you thought.

That brings you to today, nearly a month after Tim had saved you from your kidnappers. You’re currently both seated at your small dining room table, cups of cold coffee in both of your hands as you chat about everything and nothing at the same time, his mask laying on the table between you. You glance at the clock on your stove and startle slightly, it reads 3am. He had come by for a brief pick-me-up before he headed out on patrol, now it was about the time he should be done. If the things he’d told you were anything to go off of, Batman would be sure to express his dissatisfaction.

He follows your line of sight and winces when his eyes land on the clock. “I guess this means you have to go…” you say softly, trying to keep from seeming to disappointed.

He leans back in his chair and lets out a sigh before shrugging unceremoniously. “Eh, it’s okay.”

You cock an eyebrow at him. “Won’t Batman be mad?”

He gives you a grin that turns your muscles to jelly and makes your stomach erupt with a swarm of butterflies. “You think Batman’s never missed patrol because of a cutie distracting him?” He asks, looking you up and down in a surprisingly respectful manner that you find yourself wishing was a little less gentlemanly.

You feel heat rush to your cheeks and you rub at the nape of your neck in a futile attempt to disperse it. “I uh- I certainly find it hard to imagine.” You stutter, suddenly finding your floorboards completely fascinating.

He lets out a soft chuckle and a warm silence settles over the both of you like a blanket. You sit there and stare at the coffee sitting at the bottom of your cup as you swirl it around mindlessly. Your trance is only broken by Tim softly clearing his throat.

“So- so uh. I was wondering if you uh. Maybe wanted to go out with me sometime? Well not me.” He says softly, gesturing to his Red Robin uniform. “Tim Drake.”

Despite the warmth gathering in your own cheeks once more you place your elbows on the table and lean forward, taking pleasure in the pink you see on him. “If I didn’t know better I would say you like me birdie.” You tease.

He fixes you with a playful glare and copies your body language, similarly leaning forward. “What if I do?”

You click your tongue and pretend to be deep in thought for a moment. “Well…” you say slowly, “I guess I won’t have a choice but to take you up on your offer.”

He flashes you a smile that could rival the sun and stands up suddenly, prompting you to do the same. “I’ll pick you up tomorrow at 5, wear something nice.” He says with a wink before he’s opening your window, slipping his mask back on, and disappearing into the city with a short wave.

————

5.

You hadn’t slept much last night. But who could blame you? After Tim had left all you could think about was what he had in mind. You spent several hours slipping in-between consciousness and sleep and when you finally woke up for good you found yourself thankful that you didn’t have to work today as your mind darted over all the different possibilities of where he would bring you.

His cryptic fashion advice did you no favors. What exactly qualified as “nice”? You certainly had no clue, and as a result spent entirely to long scanning your closet for something. You considered several outfits. Too formal. Too casual. A shirt he had seen you wear as pajamas. A pair of shorts that would’ve been perfect had it still not been to cold. A top that showed off a little to much. Nothing worked.

It took you an embarrassingly long amount of time to settle on an outfit that could be okay for a variety of activities, even longer for you decide what accessories to pair with it. After several hours you still had time to kill before Tim picked you up, which you spent doing small chores around your apartment, mind too preoccupied to get any real work done. As 5 pm drew you near you found yourself checking over every aspect of your appearance, nothing seemed quite right but as the sound of your doorbell rang throughout your apartment you found yourself grinding your teeth and having no choice but to deal with it.

You smooth out your outfit one last time before pulling the door open. Tim stands there with a soft, nervous smile on his face, a bouquet of red roses in his hand. He’s dressed more formally than you’d expected, in a simple white t-shirt, with a dark grey blazer and slacks, finished off with black leather loafers.

He blinks in shock as he looks you up and down once, his ears turning a bright red as he seemingly snaps out of it, offering the bouquet to you. “You look lovely.” He says softly, looking away from you and towards the floor bashfully.

You feel your cheeks warm as you roll your eyes playfully and take the bouquet from him. “You’re one to talk birdie.” You flirt as you move into the kitchen to get a vase.

He follows you into your apartment, closing the door and leaning against its frame as he watches you work with a fond look in his eyes. You finish filling a vase with water and place the roses on a windowsill. You gently mess with the blood colored petals, moving them around softly before you turn to look at Tim. “Thank you for the flowers.” You say softly.

He gives you a small smile and rocks on his heels, “Ah don’t mention it.” He says with a wave of his hand.

“So, what exactly did you plan?” You ask, unable to keep the excitement from your voice as you approach him.

He gives you a smirk and opens your front door with a flourish. “After you.”

You can’t keep yourself from letting out a short laugh as you let him escort you through the hallways of your apartment building and towards a nearby parking lot, where an entirely too expensive car is waiting. You startle for a moment, but recover as he approaches it and opens the passenger door for you.

“Do you even have a license to drive this?” You tease as you slide into your seat.

He balks and stares at you in open mouthed shock for a few moments, causing you to let out a full bodied laugh.

“What is that supposed to mean?” He splutters, ears turning red as he looks at you in confusion.

“D-don’t take this the wrong way,” you say breathlessly “but you don’t look like someone who knows how to drive.”

He stares at you for a few more moments before wordlessly rounding the car and getting into the drivers seat.

“You’re sure you can sit there?” You snark.

He gives you a half-hearted glare. “And to think I was gonna take you out to a nice dinner.” He mummers under his breath as he starts the engine.

You give him an exaggerated look of shock and lean over as best you can in a mock-bow. “I am so very sorry my lord. Please forgive me.”

He considers you out of the corner of his eye, trying and failing to hide a smile. “I suppose your apology is acceptable.” He quips.

You straighten and give him a large smile, giggling as you turn your head to look out the window at the streets you’re passing. There is no denying that the start you had was rough, but now? Now you wouldn’t change what you had for the world.

[scoatneyhall]

WILD. Was anyone else aware that the Ted Lasso team has gone in and made post-production edits on season 3 episodes, sometime in the last year?

I've been rewatching the finale in advance of the one year anniversary of it airing, and straight off, I noticed that the points total on the graphic looked different to how I remembered it - a much closer race. It stuck out because I remembered being annoyed that they didn't celebrate the moment Richmond got confirmed for the Champions League, as the gap was big enough for it to have happened a while ago, offscreen. I still have a screencap from when the episode aired:

However, the current copy on Apple has an updated graphic, making the post-production graphic in line with the numbers on the actual physical whiteboard prop and the script mentioning the win streak. See here:

The corrected copy makes Richmond's points match the whiteboard, but it also puts the teams in 3rd to 5th place much closer to them points-total wise, meaning that now, in the current version of the episode, Richmond only qualified for the UCL in "Mom City," making it make more sense that the start of 3.12 is the first time it gets discussed. Would have been nice to mention that stake in the City match commentary during 3.11, but I genuinely am shocked that they went back in and edited the already-published episodes to clean up the post-production errors. For the record, here's the whiteboard as of 3.08: W10, D9, L6.

Just in case anyone cares, the order of those results was - 1 draw against Chelsea, 6 wins with Zava, 1 loss against West Ham, the rest of the draws and losses occurring between 3.05 and the loss against Arsenal in 3.07, and then the 4 wins mentioned at the start of 3.08. By the start of 3.12, it's mentioned they are on a 16 game win streak, so that's 22 wins overall, 9 draws, 6 losses, going into the final weekend, hence the updated graphic.

I like that they went in and fixed it - no idea when in the past 12 months that occured - but I also kind of can't believe they bothered? Then again, I can't believe the mistake was made in the first place, as they were so specific with details in the prior seasons, so maybe they couldn't live with it being wrong.

I know there were rumours about a ton of issues in terms of getting these episodes posted in time - right down to the wire, still fixing the edit on the airdate - and it's clear that these details were not checked and confirmed by the poor people in post who were not working off the show bible that lives in the writers heads. I don't blame them at all, I blame the people who got the edit to them late, but it did annoy me during the season a LOT. The maths wasn't mathing, and as we know this is a show that has been careful with dates and timelines and stuff like that.

Anyway! The point is, a) this post about my UCL qualification fantasies is now moot, and b) I went back and checked another post production error that had REALLY pissed me off, which was the dates of texts in Ted's phone in 3.04. Phone dates have always given us the timeline quite strictly before - it's how @belmottetower and I started the timeline in our primer, with Ted arriving in London on January 6, 2020 and then following the football seasons from there to place the season 3 finale in May 2022 - but in 3.04, all the cute texts we see to all the characters in his phone were badly misdated, placing the timeline further in the future. This caused arguments or misunderstandings, at the time about the actual timeline of the show, but it seems this was another detail the producers really wanted to fix and tighten up, as they've gone back and had it edited.

It's weird, because the texts Ted was actually going back to - the messages from Doctor Jacob - were dated correctly as late 2019, and there's even a little easter egg in the form of a US rideshare notification picking him up to go to the airport in America, on 5 January 2020. (Even the area code, 316, is apparently correct to Kansas.) That's all correct even in the original version of the episode, but somehow we then skip a year and place his most recent texts, as of 3.04, in late October 2022, when they should only be in late September or early October 2021. (I found this post on Reddit that screenshotted his phone at the time.) Examples:

I had to go back and check this, and sure enough, it's been edited to reflect the established timeline - they didn't just redate the year on each message, they also changed a bunch of the chats to be more recent - so rather than dates, his most recent chats with Henry, the Coaches, etc are from "Yesterday," then the first dated texts are in very late September 2021. This matches up pretty perfectly with where they are in a typical Premier League season - they REALLY cleaned it up. Further back, they do just switch the years on the dates, so he still got a picture from Sassy last Valentines Day, and his last one-on-one contact with Jamie is still set before the events of Wembley in 2.08 (FA Cup semi finals are in April, so a few weeks after the March 2021 date on Jamie's chat.)

My brain is itching because I swear there was a screen of Nate and Ted's text chat at some point too? With Ted reaching out about his new job, on a date that deeply did not work with the timeline? But maybe I imagined it. There's no record of Nate's number in his phone at all now, and the texts date back to before Nate left, so I guess in this version of events, Ted deleted Nate's number and message history.

Anyway, I'm aware that basically no one is going to care about this, but I suspect that the three people who will actually care will REALLY FUCKING CARE. Has anyone else noticed it? Does anyone know when it may have happened? Does anyone know what else might have been changed or fixed? I love details and I love the fact that there is no longer conflicting data about what football seasons the show is covering - it's mid 19/20 to the end of 21/22, end of story - but what a fucking mess the production of season 3 must have been, to end up at this point!

[weeeeeekly]

quarter life crisis – ot5 tomorrow x together x afab!reader

˚₊ ˚ ‧₊ .:･˚₊ ˚ ‧₊ .:･˚₊ *˚˚₊ ˚ ‧₊ .:･˚₊ ˚ ‧₊ .:･˚₊ *˚˚₊ ˚ ‧₊ .:･˚₊ ˚ ‧₊

blurb !!! Reincarnation can bring soulmates together despite their time apart. Being a huge fan of TOMORROW X TOGETHER helped you get through the struggles of entering early adulthood. You would thank them personally if you ever could but when you possibly get the chance it’s more than what you could ever hope for.

info !!! txt are still idols, reincarnation au, soulmates au, polyamory, throuple²… they’ll all eventually date each other, mc has mental health struggles, universe assigned lactose intolerance, team no kids, glasses wearer, lives in the middle of fuck nowhere but still a city (just go with it), pet names used are “our love” and princess, & not edited.

wc: 1.7k

WARNINGS !!! NSFW, MDNI, 18+, extremely self-indulgent, soft yandere!txt, mentions of mental health & self-harm (nothing graphic) for entire series

author’s note !!! This is fiction!!! this is made up!!! I do not condone breaking in, stalking, and other ulterior motives to get close to someone you are romantically interested in.

why are there not more ot5!txt x fem/afab or gender-neutral reader… mandatory note that i do not think txt act like this in real life. I also cannot come up with a blurb for the life of me, so please peep the info tags.

˚₊ ˚ ‧₊ .:･˚₊ ˚ ‧₊ .:･˚₊ *˚˚₊ ˚ ‧₊ .:･˚₊ ˚ ‧₊ .:･˚₊ *˚˚₊ ˚ ‧₊ .:･˚₊ ˚ ‧₊

CHAPTER THREE

TXT could not just be friends with you – their soulmate – the one person left on this Earth to complete them. Someone made for them. Their last love from their previous life.

They could play the long game with you. They had all the time in the world now that you were back in their lives.

They watch from the peephole to figure out your schedule. After Taehyun’s first accidentally run in with you, he made sure to go to the gym early in the morning, but soon realized that you didn’t leave for work until 7 AM. He learned that when he was walking back to the apartment the next day when you greeted him while locking your door. Soobin learned that you got home around 4:30 PM when he went out to get snacks. Kai learned what car you drove and your designated parking spot when he was sitting on the balcony, strumming his guitar. Beomgyu learned that your room was on the other side of the thin wall of their kitchen when he heard you talking to a friend at 11 PM every night. Yeonjun learned that your roommate worked as an ER nurse and would be working all day Friday when he overheard them on the phone in the laundry room.

You were still shy and nervous around them, which they found absolutely adorable, but you would remember everything soon. Even if they had to help you.

When Friday rolled around, the guys made sure to be awake by 6:30 AM to watch you leave for work with your roommate. They wait until they see your car drive off before they go next door. They climb over the railing of their porch to yours and crack open the sliding door that you never locked. Once inside, they beeline to your room.

The door was closed but not locked. Soobin opens the door slowly to your safe space and the closest they’ll get to you for now. Once they get over the shock and excitement of the posters and merch you have of them, they get to business.

Beomgyu flops down on your bed to inhale the detergent you used, clutching one of the pillows. Yeonjun opens your closet to peruse and maybe take a clothing item or two – for safe keeping, of course. Taehyun takes pictures of your calendar for your schedule for the rest of the month and anything else he deems important to know. Kai goes to your vanity to smell, and steal, your perfumes as he gets the travel spray from his pocket. And Soobin has to keep calm as he looks at your TXT shelf. He can tell that you love and care about their group.

As the others finish their side quests, they all gather around Soobin. Your adorable self has collected all their Korean albums. By the window is a white shelf under a collage of ripped out photos from their albums, the top shelf sits a binder with keychain plushies of their representative emojis, the next shelf houses their albums in release order, and the bottom shelf is their light stick and other merch. The twin shelf has albums from other groups, but they can’t be bothered to care when you have a whole shelf dedicated to them.

Kai sighs in content, “She was perfect before, but now she’s the most perfect person in the universe.”

The rest agree as Taehyun takes a picture.

“We should leave soon. The protocol team keep spamming the group chat asking for a video call.”

Staying in their soulmate’s room was cut short as Beomgyu accepted a phone call from a staff member as the guys make sure everything in your room is in the exact same place as before.

“Thank god you finally picked up! Why are you not in LA?”

“Um, we had some issues with our connecting flight.” Beomgyu tells staff as he hears the protocol team talk over each other through the speaker while he climbs over the railing to the neighboring porch.

“It’s been week! We can’t keep pushing back the In the Soop filming at the retreat house. What hotel are you in? We’ll just book the next ticket to LA from NYC.”

“There’s no need. We had a change in plans lol sorry. Manager-nim is watching over us as we film content here. Talk to you soon, bye!” Beomgyu hangs up as shouting starts and turns his phone completely off. The other members look at him as he shrugs.

“Is Manager-nim enjoying their cruise?”

Soobin shows the spam of photos their manager sent them yesterday while they were docked in a city in Europe. They made sure the free cruise they offered their manager had no wifi on the boat and paid for VIP treatment so they would be off their phone for the rest of the month as they cruised across the world.

“We should be good for another 3 weeks of peace.”

Yeonjun goes back to his shared room with Beomgyu and Taehyun to study English pick up lines, Soobin and Kai decide to watch an English movie to study their English, and Beomgyu and Taehyun head to the gym.

˚₊ ˚ ‧₊ .:･˚₊ ˚ ‧₊ .:･˚₊ *˚˚₊ ˚ ‧₊ .:･˚₊ ˚ ‧₊ .:･˚₊ *˚˚₊ ˚ ‧₊ .:･˚₊ ˚ ‧₊

Honestly, things could be worse.

The universe is somehow on your side while simultaneously being against you. Your favorite musicians, that you have major crushes on, moved in next door to you for some reason that you’re still searching for. TXT are acting like this is normal for them while you’re constantly trying to stop yourself from screaming, crying, throwing up, and other emotes whenever you see them.

You try to close your eyes for a second to resituate yourself before working on another spreadsheet, but the current state of your desk makes you rethink. Random inclusions from albums decorate your workspace – postcards and mini posters stuck to the whiteboard with magnets, fan made freebies displayed, and a TXT calendar from their season’s greetings for the year. You decorated your space with your other interests, but all of your coworkers knew about your love for TXT.

Speaking of coworkers, every time you made eye contact with one, they would send you a sympathetic look after the hiatus news came out. You’re 1000% sure that everyone knows that you cried in the bathroom after their sympathy “party”, but you were going to ignore that thought.

The rest of your day went by smoothly – well, as smooth as a day can when all you think about is world famous international sensation boy group TXT are your neighbors when they’re allegedly on hiatus. You give up on trying to jump through hoops to make sense of your very niche predicament.

roomie working overtime again

roomie going to our dream vacay fund

Getting ready to show up to an empty apartment, you triple check to make sure you saved your work and clean your desk space for tomorrow. The drive home is mundane as always, but ever since TXT moved in next door, you can’t bring yourself to listen to their music. You never acted like this unless your post-concert depression was really bad.

You may not be able to bring yourself to play your favorite songs, but you can get answers from the sources themselves.

Before you’re able to knock on your neighbor’s door, the door opens to have you facing Kai.

“Hi Kai. Can I come over?”

He mumbles your name as he steps aside to the view of Soobin napping on the couch, Yeonjun reading a magazine, and Beomgyu and Taehyun playing some video game, bickering in Korean.

Apologetically, you announce yourself, “Hey guys, sorry to barge in last minute.”

Beomgyu and Taehyun whip their head in your direction and drop their controllers at the same time. Yeonjun lowers the magazine from his face to make eye contact with you only to then cartoonishly fumble it in his hands, then trying to play it cool to read the upside-down magazine. And Soobin is rudely awoken when Kai pinches his nose.

“I have many questions, some that I know you’ll probably never answer, but please,” You kneel down and clasp your hands together, “Please answer my questions.”

You didn’t realize that your plea would send the guys into shock as Kai and Beomgyu barely function to help you on the couch. You switch places with them as the calm down standing up.

“What questions do you have?” Taehyun asks.

“How did you and Yeonjun get so good at English?”

Yeonjun’s face turns cherry red and causes him to hide behind his hands as Taehyun stares at you, taken aback.

“W-well, we had English lessons. We just watched English movies to improve.”

“You two are basically fluent.”

“Thank you, really.”

You grin is reciprocated by the duo as you twiddle your fingers, dreading to ask the next question, but you selfishly needed to know.

“Is TXT really on hiatus?”

Yeonjun looks back to the rest of the members as Soobin nods, turning back to Taehyun, he nods as well.

Your heart plummets to your stomach as you continue, “It’s not forever, right?”

Soobin walks closer as he speaks up, “Just a break. We need a break.”

You refused to check social media after the announcement. Basically, a break from social media despite it being forced so you don’t spiral. Thankfully, the only people in your life that brought it up was your work but even then, that didn’t feel real. You silently thank your roommate for not saying anything to you.

“I have a question.”

“Go ahead, Kai.”

“Do you feel…” Kai leans over to whisper in Taehyun’s ear.

“Uncomfortable.”

Kai nods as he tries again, “Do you feel uncomfortable around us?”

“Am I uncomfortable around you? More like are you uncomfortable around me! I’m a fan.”

Beomgyu kneels in front of you as his hands gently hold your face, “Our beautiful MOA.”

If someone would feel your chest, they would feel your heart beating fast enough to power a car engine. Your eyes grow wide as you stare into Beomgyu’s. The rest of the guys’ heart swell as they watch the scene that reminds them of the past. You loved it when they caressed your face.

With shaky hands, you reach up to gently take his hands off you as you abruptly stand up.

“I need to go. Bye.” Running out, slamming their door and then your door as you lean against the wall.

You were certainly going to have trouble sleeping tonight.

masterlist | previous | next

[moeyynorris]

Do You Wish That You Loved Me?

Let’s Make Trouble In the Dream World - Part 4

Max Verstappen x F!Reader, Charles Leclerc x F!Reader

Warnings: angst (related to unrequainted love and break up), arguing, Google translated Dutch, emotions related to a break up/being abandoned. Oh, and this is horribly edited, so I apologize.

Master List

You tapped the key card against the metal block on the hotel room door and waited for the light to flash green. It was just after 1am, but your mind was on overdrive. You just hoped that Max was asleep, and that you wouldn’t have to discuss your decision to end what little was left of your relationship until morning.

As you opened the door, the bedside lamp flicked on. Your heart sank and every muscle filled with dread.

Shit.

“Oh, hi mijn schat. I’m glad you’re back.” Your stomach sank at his tone. He almost sounded like he did when the two of you first started dating. His voice was honest, a little groggy, but confident. “I was wondering when you would come back to me.” His lips curled into a grin as he slowly slid out from under the covers.

“Yeah, I know it’s late. But, I just took my time. I figured you would be asleep by the time I got back either way.” You gestured to the bed, clutching your phone in your free hand.

“I tried, but it was so lonely here. And I wanted to make sure you were back safe. Now, here you are.” He reached his arms out and wrapped them around you. His grip was tight, almost possessive as he pulled you against his chest. And, for some reason, you just melted into him. Was this what you were planning? Not even close.

Max pulled away a bit, peering down at you with hooded eyes. “Come lay with me, schatje. Tomorrow—uh—today will be a busy day.” The back of Max’s hand travelled slowly down your cheek. Then, he reached for your hand and pulled you to the bed.

“Max, give me a few minutes. I need to change and get ready for bed.” Your voice was stern, which made you wince. Why was it bothering you now to be harsh? He was never like this anymore. Something was up, or maybe it was just his excitement for the race?

Max nodded as he let go of you. “I’ll wait for you, then.”

You turned for the bathroom and closed the door almost all the way. Your eyes met your reflection in the mirror, and you stared for a moment, before sighing. A part of you now thought leaving Max was going to be harder than you originally believed. Sure, you weren’t in love him anymore, but he seemed to be more attentive in the last few minutes than he had been in months.

You shook your head. No. This wasn’t fair. He didn’t get to be distant and make you feel ignored and inferior, then just come snuggling back up to you. That’s not the game you were going to play.

You started brushing your teeth as your mind faded back to just over an hour ago. The feeling of Charles’ lips on yours forced your eyes to flutter close. He was so warm, so soft, so wanting. The way you felt so natural in his grasp was enough to make your body all hot again.

Your eyes shot open as a bare chest pressed against your back. You had almost forgotten Max was there with you while your mind was dwelling on Charles.

Darkened blue eyes captured you in the mirror. Max wrapped his arms around your waist and pulled your back even firmer against him. You quickly finished brushing your teeth and turned to him.

“Um, can I help you?” You barked. Luckily, it came out sounding a bit sarcastic.

“What? Am I not allowed to hold my girlfriend after she gave yet another performance of the year? What’s so wrong with that?” His lips quickly found the nape of your neck and began sprinkling kisses there.

You tried your hardest to relax. You let out a long breath, focusing on the sensation, the warmth of his touch. But, there was no warmth. You felt absolutely nothing.

Suddenly, you mind shifted to Charles, the way you felt under his touch. The soothing warmth from his lips on yours, and his lightly calloused hands finding their natural places.

Natural. That was it. This didn’t feel natural anymore.

And it had to stop.

You pulled back, pressing the small of your back into the bathroom counter behind you. Max tried to follow you, but you put your hands between the two of you. He pulled back, sensing your intention.

“What’s wrong, Y/N?” His eyes widened in confusion as he studied your face. You shook your head.

“Max, this feels wrong!” You blurted. You voice came out louder than you intended, but you didn’t care.

“Why? What’s wrong?” He reached a hand out that you didn’t take.

“What do you mean ‘what’s wrong’?” You squeezed your eyes closed, letting out a huff. “We haven’t been, I dunno, our normal selves in a while. I mean, not like what we were before. You’ve been, well—“ You paused, trying to find the right word. “Neglecting me. You know, emotionally.”

You crossed your arms over your chest. You were trying not to be mean; there was no reason to do that. But, you needed to be honest.

“Neglecting? Y/N, I—“

“Max, this doesn’t feel natural anymore,” you confessed. His face hardened a little as he processed your words.

Max’s face hardened. “You don’t love me anymore, do you?” His tone was low, blunt, almost a snarl. He was hurt, you could see that. A part of you felt guilty for it, but it wasn’t fair to drag this on.

You shook your head. “No, Max. Not the way I used to.”

“What do you mean by that?” He took another step back, a disgusted frown on his face.

“I-I love you, like I care about your wellbeing. But, I’m not in love with you anymore, Max. I’m sorry—“

“Get out,” Max spat. His whole body tensed. His lip snarled as he stared down at the ground, like he was trying not to have to look at you again.

“Max, I have nowhere to—“

“Get. Out!” He roared. You jumped, smacking your back against the counter. You winced, then tried to ignore the pain.

You glared up at him. “Max, where am I supposed to go—“

“I don’t care, Y/N. I don’t give a shit. Go find whoever you were smiling at in the crowd—“ Max’s eyes widened in realization. “I don’t care who it is. I know it’s someone else. Go find them. Maybe they’ll take you in. Either way, you’re on your own.”

Your lower jaw trembled at the thought of being on the streets of a foreign country by yourself. You knew his heart was broken. And sure, he was hurt. But that’s no reason to kick someone out in the middle of the night in a foreign country by themselves. You could sleep in the gathering room of the hotel suite, where he wouldn’t even see you…

“Max, I wasn’t—“ That was a lie. You were staring at someone else in the crowd. Hell, you kissed someone else before coming here. Maybe you deserved to be out on the streets.

No. He wasn’t the victim here. You were unhappy and treated you like a second thought. Was it wrong to kiss Charles before admitting anything to Max? Maybe, but that didn’t mean you deserved to be out on the streets in the middle of the night.

“Y/N, leave. I don’t want you here if you don’t love me.” His eyes were glassy, like he was holding back tears. You looked away.

“Fine. Just let me grab my stuff,” you deadpanned, a hint of anger behind your voice. He nodded, a scowl still clear across his face.

It only took you four minutes to fit everything you brought into your suitcase and walk out the hotel room door. There was no goodbye, not a word between the fight and your departure. But, none of that mattered. What happened needed to happen by morning. And, well, it was technically morning.

You peered down at your phone. Yeah, it was nearly 2:30 in the morning. And you had nowhere to go.

You stared down at your phone, realizing you had 9 text alerts, 3 missed calls, and a voicemail. Squinting, you pressed on the text button.

Charles Leclerc:

1:16pm: Hey, just making sure you got back ok. Maybe it is just taking you a while. Hope you are safe.

Charles Leclerc:

1:20am: Sorry to bother you again, but I just want to make sure you are safe.

There were a few more like that. Each one showing more and more concern for you. The phone call and voicemail were more of the same. But, there was something in Charles’ voice that warmed your heart. There was genuine worry there, a sincerity that you missed. No one had spoken to your like that in a long time.

You stared at your phone for another moment, studying the name of the man whose lips were mingling with yours just a few short hours before. Should you call him? Should you tell him that you were in the scenario you were in? You sucked in a breath. He would care. He does care.

You held your phone to your ear as it began to ring. A soft yet sharp voice answered you after just two rings.

“Y/N?” Charles sounded wide awake.

“Charles—“ Before you could get anything out, you began to cry. No, you sobbed. Every emotion you had been either holding back or denying over the last few hours came rushing out at once. Your chest tightened, your jaw clenched, and your legs began to fail you.

“Y/N, what’s happening?!” Charles shouted. He wasn’t angry, but there was a heavy desperation in his voice. “Y/N, please talk to me.”

You sucked in a gasp, attempting to calm yourself down. Breathe in, then out.

After a few moments, you calmed yourself down enough to get some words out.

“I left Max, and he kicked me out.” Your voice shuddered as you struggled to explain. Charles was silent for a moment before answering.

“He kicked you out? Of the hotel?”

“Yeah,” you sighed.

“Wait, so you are out on the street right now? Where are you?” You could hear him shuffling around, then the jingle of keys.

“I’m down the street from the hotel, next to a little market with a big blue sign.”

“I will be there in ten minutes. Don’t hang up. Just keep talking to me.” Your heart fluttered at the worry in his voice.

“About what?” You sucked in a breath.

“Anything. Just keep talking to me. I’m coming to get you.”

[genderqueerdykes]

Ditch Etsy for Good: A Disabled Etsy Seller's Experience

i started my Etsy store in August of 2022. I was in desperate need of income at the time, as I am disabled, and waiting for my full disability payments to come through. I currently make $245/month off of a general assistance program that's meant to "help" while you're waiting for those payments.

I needed, at the time, $900/month for my studio apartment, because I was on a month-to-month lease, and could not re-new it, as I was the secondary renter, and my abusive ex whom I could not contact was the primary renter. They needed his signature to renew the lease, or else I was on month-to-month status, which meant they could increase my rent to whatever price they saw fit at any point.

I was struggling to stay alive. I had a bunch of kandi supplies I had gathered over the years, pony beads, string, all that kind of stuff. So i accrued some extra supplies to make other types of necklaces and chokers. Keep in mind my level of poverty, and the level of inflation in 2022. I was having to accrue supplies secondhand, from thrift stores. Everything I bought and sold was upcycled, save for the few times I could afford things to fill in the gaps from craft stores.

After I gathered supplies, I went to work. I spent countless hours making all types of jewelry. Not really sleeping. Just countless hours of stringing beads, if I woke up in the middle of the night from a bad dream or stress about homelessness, I would go back to work. I've been homeless before. Several times. Never lived on the street or in a shelter, but I have lived in hotels, cars, crashed on couches and have run from getting kicked out for making little money endless times.

I drank a lot of coffee and ate very little. Eating consumed time, time that I didn't have. Once I was done making things, it was time to photograph every. single. item., then edit them, and upload them to Etsy. I had to create listings for each individual item, all of which cost $0.20 to create, and again to renew when it ran out in 3 months if not purchased. There was already a start-up cost.

Shipping made my life a nightmare. Etsy charged me for each and every single label. I tried free shipping at first, as it's a huge draw for customers, but labels were around $3.69 from my state to the mainland United States at the time, creeping ever closer to $4. For anywhere else it would easily come to $10 or more, international shipping was easily $20 - $40. Even if the customer paid for shipping I still had to go through the process of purchasing a label.

This didn't account for the fact that I had to purchase printer, ink and paper at some point to keep printing these labels. Ink is wildly expensive and your cartridges run out faster than they should. They are rigged to flag as empty when they're not. This also does not account for ink and paper lost when the printer does something in error, which is often. The office at my apartment complex was willing to print labels and packing slips for me for a while, but they cut me off after a few months.

The biggest kick in the teeth was the processing time for my payments. Because I shipped my first few orders without tracking labels. Etsy put a hold on my money for the next 3 months. They would take a random amount of time to process each payment. I could never figure out the schedule. My money would sometimes take days or weeks to arrive when I set Etsy to a "daily" payment schedule. It was torture. I was sweating over not having money constantly, and missing payment deadlines left and right.

I was getting orders at every hour of the day. I didn't "clock out" of this job. I had to change the notification sound of the Etsy Seller app on my phone because when I heard it, I would panic. I wasn't excited, I was filled with dread. It was never ending, and I was constantly stressed about getting orders out on time. I never had time to rest. I didn't get days off. I was on the job 24/7. Unless you completely uninstall the Etsy app and refuse to check it fora while, you can't really clock out of this job.

This isn't even touching the fact that Etsy also takes a cut out of every single sale you make, meaning you have to jack up your prices wildly either to make free shipping reasonable so you're not losing money on each sale, or you have to play a dance of figuring out what the best balance between shipping and item costs are, which is time consuming. It's a lot of math and comparing against your niche's market.

Etsy has an ads feature, which you must again pay for, where they will run ads for your products in random banner ads and whatnot. You are charged if one customer clicks the ad, not purchases something, meaning this is a complete fucking scam. The minimum is $1/day and you are forced to subscribe monthly. You can cancel at any point, but sometimes it takes a full day for this to cancellation to go through. The Etsy Ads feature sucks ass. I received exactly 2 orders through their service and kept it on for a few weeks here and there. It's horrid. You do not receive a significant enough boost in traffic to make the investment worth it. Also consider how many people use adblockers these days. This isn't hard to see.

The amount of time you have to spend promoting and boosting your own shop, buying supplies, creating and photographic products, uploading them to the website, and everything else in between is not worth the amount of money you make. You do not turn a profit unless you are selling very high end products like fine jewelry and antiques. Anyone else in the bottom rungs loses money through one avenue or another, Etsy finds ways to make the entire process draining and expensive for the seller.

The also will not provide you a 1099 document to file your taxes for your earned income unless you have made over $25,000 in one year on Etsy, which is literally impossible unless you make, as I said, fine jewelry. The average Etsy seller does not make this much in one year. We do not make a liveable wage, yet Etsy pretends like we do.

I didn't realize how draining it was to run this store until I put it in vacation mode. I'm shutting it down as soon as I'm able to. I could not handle the pressure of orders coming in in the middle of the night. I could not handle the pressure of not being able to remember which bracelets I could wear, and which ones were up on the store. Or which ones I could give to friends freely without having to issue someone a refund because I made a mistake. The worry of sending the wrong customer the wrong product was constantly on my mind. Every review that came in made me scared I had fucked up or provided an inferior product. I was distraught, broken and scared.

Now I'm much more free. The piddly jackshit amount of income I made was not worth it at all. I don't think I made back the cost of supplies and I definitely was never compensated for the sheer amount of labor I put into my products and orders. Etsy just kept kicking me while I was down and now that they have made it so that you are unable to file a class action lawsuit against them, they are only becoming more tyrannical.

Etsy does not care about their small sellers. They only care about the big cash cows who bring in big views and line Etsy's pockets with the Etsy Ads program. If you're too poor too keep up they'll chew you up and spit you out. Fuck Etsy. Fuck the lack of respect for their sellers. Fuck them for holding my money randomly for 3 months because I didn't know tracking labels were REQUIRED in their eyes. Fuck Etsy for never letting me know when I was getting paid, and for paying me on such an irregular schedule. Fuck Etsy for the fucked up fees and expensive shipping labels.

Fuck Etsy for everything. Let them go. Cut the cord. Navigate to Ko-Fi or somewhere else. Let this horrid site fucking die.

[corrodedseraphine]

hellfire heart | one shot

this amazing edit of Eddie which i used here was made by wonderful @sofiiel

pairing: eddie munson x fem!reader

story based on a request by a lovely anon: could i request rockstar eddie who is a bit of an asshole, loves a drink etc? maybe something angsty! angst with half happy ending I guess?, established relationship, breaking up, modern!AU

4 310 words

the one shot is also avaliable on ao3

I was going to write this much later, but life sucks and my mood today is some kind of unfunny joke, so this request was the perfect opportunity to unload all my negative emotions in this angsty work!

Dear anon, thank you very much for your request, I hope you will not be disappointed. (I wrote the song myself, it's okay if you don't like this, you can pretend it is any other song yopu like!)

eddie munson masterlist | general masterlist

"I thought that when you come to Hawkins for a break we would organize a little campaign for the boys? They miss you so much." You lay cuddled up against Eddie's chest, who was browsing something on his phone.

"Yeah, about that." he said, turning toward you for the first time in twenty minutes. "I'm not coming to Hawkins."

"What?" you rose quickly. What did he mean he wasn't coming back? The breaks between tours were the only longer time you could spend together. Besides, you saw each other once a month when you visited him on tour.

"Babe, there are so many better things than playing some stupid game, so many parties we can go to, so many crazy things we can do." he replied, sitting down on the bed. "Being stuck for couple of months in Hawkins is not fun."

"But what about the kids? What about Wayne? Don't you miss them?"

"I miss them, but I guess if I don't come once, nothing bad will happen, right?"

"Since when is D&D just a stupid game to you?" you asked. Never in your life would you have said you would hear those words from his mouth.

"Honey, look at me, I am not that Eddie anymore. I am not a loser or freak, I am a fucking rockstar. People love me, I have fans all over the world I have everything I ever wanted. I am better, my life is better now." he said grabbing your hands. "Now I'm going to go to rehearsal, later I'll come back and we'll have dinner together, okay?"

"Yeah, sure, have fun." you replied weakly. Eddie quickly smacked you on the lips and left the apartment.

Being left alone with your thoughts was not good, as those thoughts began to wander into darker and darker corners of your brain. You loved Eddie and were happy like no one else that his dreams were coming true however, you slowly stopped liking the kind of man he was becoming. What didn't escape your attention was his sense of superiority. Suddenly everyone who wasn't recognized and famous, those who didn't participate in crazy parties whose motto was sex drugs and rock and roll, were suddenly worse. More and more, you could see the arrogance in him. At the beginning of his fame, he looked forward to visits home. He loved the hours spent campaigning, the fishing trips with Wayne, or the pleasant evenings at campfires where he played guitar and the rest of your little crazy family was singing. He kept saying that these were his favorite moments. What happened that suddenly they were no longer like that?

Eddie didn't show up for dinner. After three hours of waiting, you extinguished the candles you had lit, put the already cold food in the refrigerator, and took the wine that was supposed to be for both of you to the couch and poured it into a glass. You weren't even surprised that he didn't come back on time as he promised. Lately he had less and less time for you. Day by day there were fewer and fewer calls and messages, fewer and fewer I miss yous and I love yous, instead more and more arguments and misunderstandings. There were more and more drunken pictures of him that you saw on the Internet, more and more rumors about secret "friends" of Corroded Coffin members. At every turn whenever you went on any social media you were bombarded with theories that made you sick. Not wanting to bury yourself in this hole even more, you put your phone down on the coffee table and turned on the movie to occupy your thoughts, but somewhere in the middle of it you fell asleep.

You were awakened by Eddie's loud comeback and quiet curses from his mouth. You turned on the lamp that stood by the couch and looked at him sleepily. He was barely standing on his feet, you knew immediately that he was drunk, you couldn't stop the thought that he might have been under the influence of something else.

"Where were you?" you asked quietly, having neither the desire nor the strength to argue.

"At the re-rehsal." He replied trying to look sober. His tounge wasn't able to form any clear words.

"And later?"

"I hav' n'idea what you talkin'bout." he mumbled under his breath, you could barely understand what he was saying. He shakily walked toward the bedroom.

"Eddie you're drunk."

"'not."

"Why are you lying? Couldn't you at least write that you'll come back later?"

You received no answer. Without even trying to undress, he just threw the phone on the bedside table and landed on the soft mattress immediately falling asleep.

With a burden on your heart, you got up from the couch and, taking a bottle of water with you, because you knew he would need it in the morning, went to the bedroom to lie down next to him. The room smelled of alcohol and cigarettes. You watched his body move with every breath, wondering what happened to the boy you knew like the back of your hand. The boy who mocked everyone who devoted their lives solely to alcohol and parties. A boy who wanted more than just fame and money, who always cared about his loved ones and wouldn't even think of pushing them away in favor of other, "more famous" friends.

It hurt you what was happening to him, it hurt you that you couldn't do anything about it, because whenever you tried to talk to him on the subject everything ended in one big fight. It scared you how much you didn't like his new persona. Even scarier was the thought that this change was permanent.

You were awakened by the vibration of his phone. Wiping your sleepy face with your hand, you took it to turn it off, but you noticed a text message on the screen from an unknown number.

unknown: let me know if you want more ;)

You sharply inhaled the air feeling like your heart was about to jump out of your cage. You knew you shouldn't do this however it was stronger than you. You unlocked your phone and went into the messages with the unnamed number.

Under the message sent above was a picture of a pack of cigarettes. Did he want more cigarettes? You were surprised because after everything he went through in the Upside Down he promised you he would stop smoking. Biting your lower lip nervously, you started scrolling up. There weren't a lot of messages, the earliest one was sent a few hours ago, half an hour before Eddie got home. However, one detailed message from him was enough to make your vision begin to blur.

unknown: how can I return the favor?

eddie: send nudes eddie: just kidding

As if burned, you threw the phone straight at him. He woke up with a growl. Little did he know, though, that a hangover would be the least of his worries. You quickly got out of bed and started getting dressed.

"What's goin on?" he asked seeing your condition

"What's goin on?" you asked pointing your finger at the phone. He frowned and looked at the tiny screen and then realized what was the reason for your behavior. "Who is she?"

"Chrissy's friend." he replied as if nothing had happened.

"And what does she have to repay you for?" Your voice slowly broke.

"After the party she needed a ride so I ordered a cab and we drove her and then I came back here. I don't see what the problem is."

"You really don't see what the problem is? Maybe in what you wrote back to her!"

"It was just a joke don't be dramatic!" he replied sitting down on the bed.

You couldn't believe it. He really thought that writing such things to other girls was okay? Even if it was just a joke, you were not going to accept it. Although you've always known that Eddie can laugh at anything, jokes also had their limits, and this was definitely overstepping them.

"You can't be serious now." you said looking straight at his tired face.

"It was just a joke." he repeated through his teeth. "It's not my fault you don't get them."

The old Eddie would never do something like that to you. The old Eddie, when Steve made jokes like that with other girls was the first to point it out to him and say how pathetic his behavior was. Your old Eddie at least would have let you know yesterday that he would be late and wouldn't be back for dinner.

"I don't care if it was a joke Eddie. I don't give a shit it was a joke!" you raised your voice. Everything you had kept under lock and key for the past months was just being released from you. "How would you feel if I wrote to any of your friends like that?"

An expression of realization flashed across his face, but after a moment it was again replaced by irritation. "After all, she didn't send me any, at least she knows it was a fucking joke, not like you!"

"You wouldn't even admit to me if she had sent one! You could have flirted with each other all the way back and you still wouldn't have told me about it!"

"Maybe we were!" he yelled. "Just- Can you just shut up, my head is pounding." He said hiding his face in his hands. "Get the stick out of your ass, because lately you've been doing nothing but whining."

"No. I'm sick of it Eddie. I'm sick of the person you've become." Shocked, he immediately raised his head. His big puppy eyes found yours however, this time you didn't give in. What was going on between the two of you was not good and it was time to explain. It was time for brutal honesty. "You have changed. You have become someone you would have been disgusted with just two years ago."

"What are you talking about?"

"About you, Eddie! Now all that matters to you is alcohol and these stupid parties. I don't know if you remember, but during one of your speeches at the table in high school you emphasized how much you despise such people!"

"I don't know if it gets to you, but we're not in high school anymore." he scoffed.

"What happened to you? What happened to Eddie, who wrote songs about fighting knights and dragons? Who wrote beautiful love ballads? Whose music had a message? Your last album is all empty words about sex, drugs and how there is nothing meaningful in life! I can understand to devote a few songs to that, but not a whole damn album!" You knew that criticizing his music would be a blow to a sensitive spot, but what was your one blow compared to his treating you like a punching bag? "Where is Eddie who couldn't wait for the campaign and was excited to wonder if Dustin would find an ulterior motive in it? Where is the Eddie who could talk to Will for hours about his role as DM? Where is the Eddie who at every possible opportunity went back to Hawkins to spend some time with his Uncle? Where the hell is the Eddie who didn't choose getting drunk over our dinners together? Where is the Eddie who was always looking for ways to be close to me?!"

"Y/n…" he tried to interrupt you however it was too late. You sped away breaking all the brakes along the way.

"Where is Eddie, who always answered my I love yous? Because the one in front of me now doesn't even want to look at me anymore." You were crying, struggling with breathing out the words. "For the past few months, every time I come you have a problem with kissing me. If I didn't hug you myself you wouldn't do it. You don't answer my messages, you don't answer my calls, when was the last time you told me you loved me?"

"Maybe I wouldn't have stopped doing that if you hadn't criticized me all the time!" he shouted avoiding your last question. He knew the answer would not be acceptable.

"And in what should I support you?! In getting drunk to the point of unconsciousness? Asking for nudes from other girls?! Do you even have any idea how much it hurts me? You don't tell me anything! You keep everything a secret, your nights out, your new friends, you never want to talk about it! How do I know what the hell you are doing there?! I'm supposed to support you in this so that later I can see pictures everywhere from clubs of you having a great time with your fans who are pushing themselves straight into your lap and you don't even try to stop them?!"

"You're just jealous! You're pathetically jealous because you can't accept that my life is so much better now and I don't need you in it at all!"

Suddenly you had nothing more to add. Everything had become clear. Clearer than you had imagined.

It took a while for him to realize what he had said, his words broke the heart not only for you but also for him, because he knew that this was the moment when he would lose you.

"Baby, no. Shit, I am so sorry-" he approached you quickly grabbing your hand but you immediately yanked it away. "Sweetheart, please, that's not what I meant. You know I love you, I'm sorry I've been acting like this lately, please, I'll change, I promise." he panicked. It intensified when he didn't get any response from you. You walked around the room collecting your belongings, which you threw into a suitcase occasionally wiping away tears. Despite his begging and following you around like a lost puppy dog you never spoke a word to him again. Even when you left slamming the door.

For the first few weeks it didn't get to him. He completely lost himself in the party vortex forgetting all God's world "enjoying" his freedom. Waking up in places he didn't know next to people he didn't remember with a massive headache, lack of energy and nausea. This was his new daily life. A daily life that was wearing him down. The Internet was buzzing with news, stories and footage of him getting into fights with other people, or of Gareth and Jeff or Simon having to carry him out of clubs and bars because he was so drunk he couldn't do it on his own strength.

Locked in a vicious cycle, he was starting to suffocate. Suddenly all the things he wanted so much but couldn't do when he was with you were starting to push him away. Suddenly all the quickies with people whose name he didn't even know began to disgust him. The mere mention of any alcohol made him sick. Despite the fact that there were still plenty of people around him giving him their full attention, he felt lonely. Queues of groupies lining up for the tour bus, the forbidden fruit that tempted so much turned out to be nothing.

Lying alone in bed, he stared at the ceiling feeling cold. The darkness that surrounded him consumed his entire soul. Hearing the vibration of the phone he quickly grabbed it hoping it was a message from you, but it wasn't. Suddenly Eddie felt a burning feeling in his eyes that he hadn't felt in a long time. He touched his tear-wet cheeks in disbelief. He couldn't remember the last time he cried, but it must have been a very long time ago. Feeling despair spreading throughout his body, he decided to grab a lifeline and called the person he could always count on in such situations. The person who never refused to help him and who always managed to chase away his demons. Unfortunately, this person did not answer this time, leaving him alone. The person he shouted right in her face that he didn't need her in his life. Sadly, he needed her more than he thought, and loved her even more, but somewhere in his crazy journey, greedy for fame, he forgot all about it leaving him completely alone. He thought about the moment you separated, thought about everything you told him then, thought about how right you were. The longer he thought about it, the more disgusted he became with the person he had become. You were so damn right. He felt like a blinded fool. In fact, that's exactly what he was. The Eddie you loved got lost in the maze of celebrity and money, and in order to survive there he had to adapt to the new environment by creating a completely new version of himself. A version he wasn't proud of.

When he finally calmed down and wiped away his last tears he felt a surge of motivation. He was determined to find the old Eddie and bring him back.

Everyone immediately noticed the change. When rock star, social spirit, party monster Eddie Munson locked himself inside four walls cutting himself off from everything people were shocked. The real reason was known only to the members of Corroded Coffin, who forced him to talk. When he finally told them everything they showed him great support and helped him regain his former self. It was not an easy and quick process, but after a few months he managed to change tracks. Focusing mainly on writing new songs, after the concerts he always returned to the hotel, where he occupied his thoughts with planning D&D campaigns to which he also wanted to return. It turned out that escaping into the fantasy world was still great medicine for his tortured soul. He spent a great deal of time talking to Wayne. The old man was initially very surprised, but also happy to hear his nephew more often now. At his and Corroded Coffin's manager's urging, he also tried visits to a psychologist, which helped him not only find balance in his new life but also helped him deal with nightmares from the past.

The last destination on the tour was Indianapolis. Being so close to home, Eddie sent you all VIP entrance tickets. With a tightness in his heart, he watched as Max, Lucas, Dustin, Mike, El, Erica and Will lined up right at the barriers in front of the stage. Right behind them walked Steve and Robin, and at the very end you. After such a long time of no contact with you, he felt like crying at your sight. He didn't believe you would come, he thought you hated him and nothing would convince you to be here today. And yet there you were. Fate was giving him a chance and he wasn't going to let it pass.

The concert went well, to everyone's surprise, they didn't play a single song from the new album. They relied mainly on those that were written back in Gareth's garage in the days when the world had no idea who Corroded Coffin was. Some people, were not happy about this, but the vast majority sang the songs along with them as much as they had breath. At the very end of the performance, Eddie approached the microphone putting his finger to his lips, thus asking for silence.

"Before we finish, I'd like to announce something." he said looking around. "I'm damn grateful for each and every one of you here, if it weren't for you, we would never have gotten this far, and I will never be able to repay you for that." The crowd went wild, everyone started shouting and applauding, and Eddie smiled and once again asked for silence. "Unfortunately, even on the most beautiful journey one can get lost. And I got lost very badly, and I think that if someone hadn't shouted it in my face a few months ago I would never have found my way back." He grunted. He tried to find you in the crowd, but the headlights blinded him and he couldn't. You, however, saw him. You saw him very well, for the first time in a long time you saw Eddie. The real one. "But I found it. This road is not one of the easiest, so it hurts my heart to tell you that this is the last Corroded Coffin concert this year. It will be a few months before we start working on the new album and hit the road again, and I hope that at least some of you have the boundless patience to welcome us back in time as warmly as you bid us farewell today." he chuckled, receiving thunderous applause anew. "But before we say a final goodbye for today we have a surprise for you."

Unfamiliar chords rang out from the speakers as everyone realized it was a new song, and people started jumping and shouting with excitement.

Cold ground as your deathbed The last thing you hear is scream Heart-wrecking cry of a little ship The little ship is begging Praying to the God above for a miracle You don't know which one But one of them have heard the prayer And you are breathing again

You are back but something is wrong You are back but something is missing Your hands are cold Your heart is colder

Then you meet her Like a ray of sunshine cutting through the clouds Her touch is soft Her voice is calm But her heart Her heart was forged in the abyss of hell In the fire hottest than the Sun She's got a hellfire heart

You can try to avoid it You can try to escape But when she touches you she leaves burning marks She will break your ribs She will pull the lungs out of your chest She will find a way to your heart And you will let her

Be careful you blind fool Because once you lose her You feel like death is taking you back Be careful you stupid creature Because once you stop appreciating what you've got You'll end up alone Without the littlest spark to keep you warm You will freeze to death in the middle of a fire

When you meet her Like a ray of sunshine cutting through the clouds Her touch is soft Her voice is calm But her heart Her heart was forged in the abyss of hell In the fire hottest than the Sun She's got a hellfire heart

After the concert officially ended, the whole group went backstage. Seeing the excitement of everyone except you, Eddie guessed that you didn't tell anyone about what happened between you. When he found the right moment he pulled you aside and locked the two of you in a fitting room. Without a word you stared at each other waiting for someone to finally make the first move. Despite his fear, he knew he had to be the one to make it.

"Thank you for coming." he said quietly taking a step closer to you, but you took that one step back. "I know I fucked everything up, I know that some stupid song won't change anything, I know you have the right to hate me. I've been a complete asshole, everything at its worst, I've treated you in a terrible way, and to tell you the truth I don't even deserve to have you standing here with me…" he once again tried to approach you. This time you did not move away. "I love you, I haven't stopped loving you and you need to know that. I know I didn't show it to you like I should have, I know you didn't feel it and you had the right to doubt it. I want you to know that I have changed. At least I'm trying to do that, I'm in therapy and it's said to be having an effect. Who would have thought, huh?"

"Your apology won't make me forget all this Eddie." you said.

"I know, and I don't expect you to forget. All I'm asking you for is a chance, to show that I've changed. I may never be able to get back the old Eddie you fell in love with, but I can assure you that the Eddie you hated is definitely not coming back. In front of you stands a brand new Eddie, hopefully better than the previous ones."

"I can forgive you, but that doesn't mean it will stop hurting." The tears in your eyes were breaking his heart. Old Eddie would have killed him for how much pain he caused you. "Even if I forgive you it doesn't mean I'll give us a second chance Eddie. I don't know if I'll be able to."

"I know, but I beg you to try to get to know me again. Maybe someday you'll be able to fall in love with me all over again." he grabbed your hand. Large and warm, in which you could easily hide your own. Whose touch used to be home to you.

"I forgive you." you whispered. Hearing those words, he couldn't stop the smile that pressed on his lips. That was enough. From that moment on, he knew he would do anything to fix the mistakes of the past.

"Can I hug you?" he asked shyly, and you only nodded your head. Holding you in his arms, he felt that his life was becoming complete again.

Your path was uncertain, you had no idea how it would end, and neither did he. However, the end was far away, and for now you had to focus on the beginning.

taglist: @i-me-mine @phantypurple @tlclick73

[deadpool15]

Underwear?

"Hello, vlog. I'm currently in the kitchen. You can obviously see that if you have fucking eyes. I'm sorry, sometimes people will be slow. So, a couple of things have happened, first being I got MARRIED." Lyric says while smiling at the camera. "I've just been sitting in my house, living life. I got married in January, so it's been like a couple of months and I know what you thinking your this man done turned our girl into a fucking housewife. No, well shit I mean, the dick is good soo." I laugh while walking towards the refrigerator to grab out the ingredients for the pasta dish I'm making. Just a little simple meal, because I mean you got to save the best for last am I right. Yall know I'm right.

I managed to score me a 6'2, beautiful ass model and actor combined. Yea, that shig was definitely on my bucket list, I mean I was thinking more of a tall women like that video game with the zombies but, shit it's not like I fell short or anything. I met Byeon during Paris fashion week, during a bathroom accident. And by that I mean I walked into the wrong fucking bathroom because I was distracted and lost as fuck. I turn about towards the camera after explaining the situation. "I mean, I'm pretty sure that shit happened to everyone before to all of you. Agree with me, please. The sad part is this isn't the first time I've walked into the wrong bathroom. Let me live, ok. So, back to the story."

Flashback

"Omg, I'm going to fucking piss my pants. I'm too old for all this running and shit. A bitch is about 4'11, therefore I'm not athletic enough either. Sir fucking move." I practically scream at the random man blocking the entrance, ofc he tries to stop me but I pay him no mind, and immediately run into a stall. "This stupid fucking dress." After about what felt like 12 minutes I was able to use the bathroom. I walked out only to walk face first into a door, I looked up and saw a face. "Shit, dude, you are basically built like a wall. Wait, isn't this the women's bathroom, or do you identify as a women. If so, I'm totally sorry, ma'am." He looks down at me smirking before I notice this is the most beautiful man I've ever seen. "Shit, dude, you look like you were made by AI, I mean young lady."

It takes me a moment to realize he is speaking to me. Fucking beautiful specimen. I know his dick is big. Wait shit no what's wrong with me. Well, I'm obviously horny as shit and he could totally fix that issue. "This is the men's restroom, or you lost?" I look up at him basically staining my fucking neck shit this dude is tall, he could totally break my back. Wait, stop it. This is the men's bathroom, which explains why that dude tried to stop me from coming in here. "Yea, I am lost, sir. I was trying to find the womens bathroom, though that's obviously too late since I've already used the bathroom, and well, you know."I should walk you back them, just in case you get lost and wander into another's men's bathroom and some other guy gets the chance. Strange girl." I blush while looking around the bathroom." "Yes, you should be kind, sir."

Present

I start mixing all the ingredients while I finish telling the story, smiling at how the memories make me feel. "So. I'm just gonna let this cook for 30 minutes, and it should be done. I had already prepared the recipe last night, so everything is pretty much good. Anyways, how yall doing? Oo shit, this is a vlog, not a live video. Yea, I'm just gonna edit that out. I don't need yall thinking I'm slow and shit." As I finish speaking, my phone starts going off, and someone is literally blowing up my phone. "Acting like I owe child support in this bitch. I don't claim any foreign. Oo shit yall it's just my MAN." I smile once I see the contact.

Myman- Hey baby, are you busy ?

Mymam- Are you even up, I know you don't wake up til like 4 in the afternoon.

Myman- I was just checking in, baby. We got a break on set, and I told the staff that I had to speak with my wife.

Myman- There is this random girl that kinda won't leave me alone, not that you need to worry, though. I handled 👏 it.

Babycakes- I'm up

Babycakes- Who tf is bothering you, baby? If I need to come out there and check a bitch I will.

Myman- No, baby, nothing like that, I promise, just a little flirting.

Babycakes- Say no more say no more say no moreeee

Babycakes- I'm on my wayyyy

I gathered everything and headed to the car, and before I knew it, I made it on set. "So, since they still kinda filming, I can't bring yall. We'll I can I just like can show yall shit to be honest. So, I mean yall can we my man. My husband. So, let's go." I get out of my car walking up the security guards who greatly remember me and allow me in without a fight. "Omg, yall I thought I wad gonna have to be the anger black women in this bitch, anyways let's find our target." I walk pretty much all over the set saying him to everyone including Lee Yoon-mi. "It's my favorite strong girl. Guys, look at my girlfriend." She laughs hysterically at my comment. "Hello, to Lyrics vlog, stop saying I'm your girlfriend before your husband tries to take us apart." I kiss her cheek while hugging her, asking where would Byeon be right now. "He should be in his trailer. He heard you were coming and got all excited and locked himself in there, saying he was waiting patiently for his love." I laugh at how dramatic he is before telling yoon bye, leaving to finally get to him.

I spot the trailer that lists his name on it before knocking. "Are yall excited to see him, I mean, I am." I wait a while before I hear him at the door, "I told you all. I'm kinda busy." He opens the door staring at me wide-eyed. "To busy for me, sir." Byeon immediately grabs me and yanks me into the trailer, turning off my camera before I could introduce him to everyone. "I fucking missed you so much," I stare at him shocked since he is literally smelling me right now. He grabs my ass while pushing me further through the trailer, "You look so pretty. It's too pretty to walk out of the house. Fuck other people probably saw you didn't they?" "Ofc, they saw me baby I had to ask for your location, duh? What's wrong?" He grabs my jaw while pushing me against the Makeup table. "Don't sass me right now, I've been waiting forever. Sitting here hard thinking about fucking you until you can't walk. Seems like I didn't do a good enough job last night. Let's fix that."

"W-wait baby, we can't do that here," though it seems like my voice means nothing to him because he has already pushed me down bending me over. "But what if they hear, and I'm pretty sure you have to be on set soo- "Come on baby, don't make me beg. You know you want it to, and that's why you came here dressed up for me. All pretty for me." Before I can protest further, he starts fingering me slowly, causing me to moan out loud, and he stops. "Your sensitive baby, why are you sensitive? That would mean you were touching yourself earlier. Shit your already about to cum. I'm gonna have to punish you for that."

[wavernot4love]

i do believe it is time for another vaguely infamous wavernot4love show recap ...... idkhow impending gloom rochester, 11.16.24 edition (tour spoilers after the break thingy)!!!! one of my favorite visitations i've ever experienced methinks ..... finally gettin the chance to ramble 2 dallon after years ...... and successfully getting rid of most of my bracelets ..... oh my!!!! oh boy, this one is going to be lengthy because SO MUCH fun stuff happened, man. right then (note that i went in mostly blind this time which was certainly An Experience):

also!!!! in general!!!! as i mentioned up there visitation was easily a top 3... top 2???? visitation i have ever experienced (i told dallon this exact thing.... more on that later).

i'd hoped she'd play hot to go 😍

(but unironically, transition back into visitation goes crazy) ((i feel like the absolute lack of any form of Cinematography whatsoever in this goes to show how i was feeling here)

let me tell you, the MOMENT the oh my lord lord lords started i just had this Feeling it was gonna be one of those visitations (i recall turning 2 my cousin and this sentiment being echoed). and that it was ,,,,, the ol Split sure did happen directly next to us so we got 2 chill there goin yeedy yeedy heedy heedy with dallon and his megaphone. i could recite the entire visitation yodel segment in my sleep methinks. very fun stuff. peep me lookin 4 videos from the other side of the split on instagram ,,, also gotta say dallon's "ladies, gentlemen, and everyone in between" will always make me giggle and kick my feet a bit (in a /j way). it's like the mormon tabernacle choir bit (which didn't happen this time, i honestly think this was the first non fest show i've seen where they didn't do a letter. not complaining as uhhh.... absence can in fact make the heart grow fonder n i know she'll be back someday)

is now the time to share that i only know the words to hot to go due to 1. this and 2. terrible influence toronto. the titronto singalong as i've seen it be called. i am about the same level of an up to date main pop girlie (gender neutral) as your grandpa. but i am glad 2 be adopted into the singalong by true main pop girlies (dan phil and dallon)

with that being said... SIXFT went too hard last night!!!! as always. but dallon's lil speech about us all focusing on the moment now because someday we'll all be six feet deep that went right into the tune..... oh yes what an intro.

i feel like earlier on, things REALLY started picking up/the crowd and everyone got into the swing of things with gloomtown brats. i always kinda take note of when everyone seems 2 loosen up near the beginning of a set and Yup . this one was it last night. blondie rapture-esque 80s rap bit you will always be so beloved. i remember when you were just a figment of dallon's imagination he talked about potentially wanting to do someday on twitter ,,,,

we finally got satanic panic oh yes. the minute dallon started talking about growing up in the 80s oh i knew where This was going. this is makin me wish i could post more than one video in here.

also speaking of, hearing kiss & tell live made me like her SO much more oh my. dallon crushes it in the chorus, something about it is very earwormy to me gotta say.

also..... ABSINTHE CAME BACK FROM THE GRAVE!!! mad iqs as well but i think absinthe had been... absent for longer. i will always think of the time i was goin nuts during her at this radio fest in 2019 and my phone sailed straight out of my pocket and across the crowd.

i fear i will Always enjoy dallon telling us under 25s to cover our ears and eyes for Adult Themes before what love. as someone who recalls when he did something of the sort for the debra cover circa 2019 i am glad i still fit into the age bracket 2 be patronized here.

opening band was gr8 as always, my favorite bit being the.... extended .... you may just like the.... segment. the parents, and especially boyfriends, sure did get shouted (called?) out. dallon (about said boyfriends getting dragged along): ....but you still gave us money! [crowd laughter] (back to singing) and that's what gives me.... a purpose ......

choke also hit extra last night. song goes HARD, i was desensitized for a while way back when it was constantly getting play on alt radio, but man, she is Not overrated,,,, appropriately rated, i think

no extra ending brobecks song but i am Not complaining. gr8 set, and hopefully someday bike ride will come back 2 me ......

also, i should mention that i Really enjoyed brasko's set. not inherently my kinda music per se, but the energy was off the charts. the dude had character, which i respected. get there early if you're going 2 any of these shows. also, opening band w/ alexsucks dude was sweet. the way i also have the "headlining band" segment memorized from the superet days ..... much like other Live Idkhow ™️ moments like the "i died in 1917" bit of visitation (which actually caught me off guard last night when it was changed to "i died in rochester new york" ...... damn poor visitation character. /hj) or the OH WHA OH OH OH in the second verse of clusterhug.

anyways, on to the post show Events .....

so long story short all the folks i knew @ the show wanted 2 leave (hence why i drove separate,, mwahaha), so the gang split up and i headed 2 the side of the building with the bus, where there were lots of people hanging around, and pretty much curled up borderline in the fetal position against the wall where i sat for a solid 45 minutes (it was cold and in the moment i did not quite have the energy 2 wander around starting conversations to trade etc)

due to said Cold, i pretty much set a time of 12:15 for when i'd leave if nothing had happened yet.... a couple times i contemplated going since i was straight up shivering but Something made me stay and man am i so glad i did!!!!

i remember watching that clock tick qusstioning how much longer i could go, and then right about 12:15 (maybe a minute or two after), a crew member came out and told us dallon was coming out to meet us, he was just on vocal rest but could sign/take pics etc!

so naturally wavernot4love was Back in business and i jumped 2 my feet and instantly was energized enough to chat some folks up and get rid of a good chunk of my bracelets (!)

sadly i somehow didn't think 2 bring a cd or anything so i had Nothing to get signed (oh my) but man, that didn't matter. i was just so stoked to finally meet dallon after years of going 2 shows/trying to!

anyways, homie came out and when he got to me he like. waved dbdbdh our whole "conversation" was quite funny considering the ways dallon improvised to get around not being able to talk.

i was basically like "hello! i know you can't talk so i am just.... gonna ramble 2 you for a minute!"

and that i sure did. essentially i went on a quick minuteish long recap of the Lore ,,,,

i remember i started by just saying how much the shows/music have meant to me over the years, and dallon did a thank you in sign language to me (like, the motion with your palm facing your chin that kinda looks like a backwardsish wave) which he did probably a dozen times later (it was really sweet honestly) and bringing up that this was my ninth time seeing them which made one of the ppl i was trading w exclaim like, "wow!" or something along those lines (hghfhfh i got vaguely embarrassed then, the way whenever i am meeting band folks i just completely go in our lil Bubble internally and forget other folks are. Right There), and dallon like. put his hand by his heart and then put his hand out like, wanting me to shake it and i think he seemed like he wanted me to introduce myself so i quickly said ya know that i am nat or natalie whatever you want 2 call me,,,, while we were shaking idk dawg it was goofy.

anyways, i babbled about how i'd been a fan of idkhow/the brobecks' music forever, and that i first saw them like, down the street basically at a venue called anthology on the waterparks tour way back and since had seen them all over rochester, syracuse, and buffalo, and how i was so glad they/he keeps coming back and how nice it's been to not have to travel outside of the area for any of my shows!!! i just went on about how much i love the shows and how much i especially loved visitation, and he kept doing the thank you thing (he did that about as much as i called him "dude," something i tend to do in Band Folk conversation when i'm meeting someone for the first time and am vaguely nervous (god it's like my literal embodiment of the "sorry i say shawty when i'm nervous" meme).

when he could tell my story was pretty much. you know. ending he made like. a lil camera taking a picture motion with his hands with like. a question mark in there somehow fbfbfh which was really convenient actually because i always feel awkward asking. anyways, i was like hell yeah let's go and then i did my goofy thing i always do for pictures where i remember i don't like how my glasses glare or whatever for pics so i panic and am like "actually wait!" while i randomly chuck them someplace out of the picture for the moment. i may have mildly scared dallon here i'll be honest. but also kinda amused him who knows, we all have our quirks

anyways, we took a few pics and i basically said great show man thanks and see you at the next show! and he i think waved or something along those lines and we went our separate ways!!

i did make a lil post right after this happened last night here but here's the pic again!!! hooray!!!!

i do think it is safe to say i finally broke the wavernot4love x water street music hall curse (the other three shows i'd been to there, not idkhow, were not really the greatest experiences). it is lookin good 4 the future!!!!

anyways, GREAT great show as always and man i'm so glad me and dallon could finally meet!!!!

[wosomarvel]

communication - 02

warnings: light angst (idk if this counts as angst or not)

also, i'm so happy vilda is finally out, even if it is disappointing that it took so long. next, rubiales.

contigo jenni

-----

in the few months since sim had started at her new job, she was surprised at how well she'd been able to settle in. she'd gotten her new office set up with the necessary computers and camera equipment. she'd spent a lot of her down time roaming the facility when the girls weren't around. the young girl had filmed enough content to put up several posts on the lionesses' official social media accounts.

so far, the engagement was increasing compared to the content published before her arrival. sim knew better than to take her foot off the pedal, though. her drive to be good enough, to succeed, to be wanted would never let her rest.

that's how she found herself hunched over her laptop in her flat, empty coffee cups littering the desk. the sound of cars passing by outside the flat served as a tempting lullaby. sim's eyes stayed shut a little longer each time she blinked.

she was working on a short video for the lionesses' youtube page, clipping together pictures, short segments of video, and interview-like questions she'd asked the team during the most recent camp.

sim had had a great deal of fun at camp. she'd stayed in the same hotel as the team, which allowed her to catch some golden moments off the pitch that otherwise wouldn't be made public.

over the course of the week and a half she'd spent with the girls, she'd also found herself falling into an easy banter with most of them. she'd become fast friends with ella and alessia, the girls doing their best to bring sim out of her shell. leah had taken more of a watchful role, ensuring the young girl was finding everything okay.

as for the rest of the team, sim found a comfortable balance between friends and coworkers. she was alright with the more professional role she inhabited with them, content to observe and capture their interactions and movements through a lens.

even though it had only been a couple of months at the new job, it made sim uneasy how easy it was to fall into a rhythm with the team. she didn't want to be too much for anyone. she was constantly worrying about overstepping boundaries, or being too annoying. despite the multiple invites to go grab coffee with alessia and some of the other arsenal players since the end of camp, sim found it hard to believe that the girls really enjoyed her company that much.

the sound of her phone buzzing snapped sim out of her trance. she rubbed her eyes, reading over the text she had just received from alessia.

leah, beth and i are grabbing coffee after training later. want to join?

sim sighed, running a hand through the mess of curls on her head. she was reluctant to agree. she wanted to finish her current project and have the video published by wednesday morning. sim's back straightened when she realized that was now tomorrow morning.

another buzz from her phone.

leah says you don't have a choice. we'll pick you up at 3:30 (:

sim's eyebrows furrowed at the small smiley face tacked on to the end of the message, her grip on her phone slackening. she was reluctant to agree to the girl's demands, the self-imposed deadline looming dark.

she scratched at the skin just behind her ear, a nervous habit she'd picked up who knows when. she shot off a simple 'ok' to alessia, knowing her friend was too stubborn to relent. sim set the device down, turning her attention back to the editing software open on her laptop.

4:39 am. sim considered grabbing an energy drink and powering through the assignment in front of her, in the end, deciding against it. if she pushed herself any further, she'd be dead on her feet when she met less and the girls for coffee later.

sim set her computer down beside the bed, finally allowing herself to surrender to sleep for the first time in almost 48 hours.

-----

they were late. very late.

sim was leaning against the cold concrete pillar outside her building, the surface reminding her of the sides of a swimming pool. she might as well be in one, with how hard it was raining.

she glanced at the time blinking on her watch. 4:09 pm. she sighed. she'd only ended up sleeping for 5 hours. she'd woken up to thoughts of the stupid youtube video she was supposed to have uploaded. it seemed as though her brain would not let her catch a break. she couldn't escape her anxiety, even in her sleep.

"oh my gosh, i'm so sorry we're late. we were reviewing film after training and breaking down the next match-"

"less, it's okay." sim cut off the rambling of the forward, allowing herself to be guided into the backseat of the sedan that had just pulled up, with leah driving and beth occupying the front passenger seat.

sim sank into the black leather seats, grateful for the warmth the car provided., setting her crutch sideways on her lap. she watched the city move by through the window, running her fingers over the stitching on the seats. she was still new to the city, not quite acquainted with the packed streets of london. she'd moved down here for her new job with the lionesses.

sim was secretly grateful for the number of women's football teams based in london. despite the size of the city, it was nice that so many of the lionesses played here. it made the weight of the loneliness she felt ease a bit.

"what's your order, then?" asked leah as they stepped into the small coffee shop.

"oh, i'll just order mine separately."

"that's nonsense. i invited you out, i pay," leah asserted. sim let out a long exhale, knowing she wasn't going to be allowed to pay for her own.

"i'll just do an iced coffee with two creams and two sugars. but i've got next," sim replied.

accepting money from others had always made sim feel uncomfortable. it was something that had been drilled into her head growing up, a fundamental piece of punjabi culture. never accept money from others, and always offer to pay. sim decided to forgo the last part. the move to london had almost bankrupted her and while her new wages were certainly a nice increase from the waitressing job she'd worked previously, her bank account wasn't exactly thriving.

"what were you doing up so early this morning?" alessia asked as they settled into a corner booth.

sim raised an eyebrow at the question. "i could ask you the same thing."

"i had an early night and got up early for a run with the team. you still haven't answered my question."

"yeah, at least we know less is sleeping. you on the other hand... you've looked better, i'll leave it at that," beth added with a chuckle.

"thanks, beth, you really know how to make a girl smile," sim said, a smile taking over her face.

"alright, seriously, answer the question now. enough stalling." sim could see the gentle concern behind the smile on leah's face.

she didn't know why leah was so worried. she knew that maybe her sleeping habits were less than healthy, but she couldn't understand why leah cared. they'd known each other for barely three months. that hadn't stopped the defender from taking on a sibling type role in sim's life, though.

she shrugged, sipping on the coffee before setting it back down on the table. "just working on this new video for the youtube. i've gotta have it up by tomorrow morning." sim kept her focus on the surface of the table, and the way the condensation from her cup was pooling around the edge.

eye contact had never been something that came easy to sim.

alessia's eyebrows furrowed. "so you decided you'd pull another all-nighter to get it done?"

"technically, it wasn't an all-nighter because after i got your text, i went to bed," sim mumbled, swirling the ice around her cup. she used the sleeve of her sweater to wipe at the pool of water on the table.

leah frowned. "what do you mean, another all-nighter?"

sim groaned. leah was like an annoying, overbearing parent. she was only 5 years older than sim, which only frustrated the girl even more.

"sim, i know you're worried about keeping the job, but running yourself into the ground won't do you any favors. i've heard some of the higher-ups talking, and they're already impressed. it sounds like we've already got some new sponsorships coming through. take care of yourself, alright? ease up."

sim looked up to meet leah's eyes. she saw the worry reflected in the tightness of leah's eyebrows, the way her eyes roved over her own face, taking in the bags under sim's eyes and then down to the hunch of her shoulders.

"we've got tomorrow off as a rest day. why don't you come by my place? i'm having some of the girls come around for a movie marathon," alessia offered.

a smile graced sim's face. she ignored the way her heart leaped at the chance to spend time with alessia, labelling it as friendly excitement.

"i'll be there."

"you're a good kid, sim. you work hard, but remember to rest sometimes too," beth said softly, putting an arm around sim's shoulder and squeezing gently.

sim allowed herself to lean into the comfort. she was exhausted. and technically, she reminded herself, the video didn't actually have to be up until saturday. as much as she wanted it up early to impress her superiors, she knew the girls were right.

sim let herself enjoy the rest of the afternoon with her friends, joining in on the laughter and jokes, letting herself get carried away in conversation. it didn't hurt that at some point, alessia had reached across the table and taken sim's hands in her own, playing with her fingers as the day progressed.

sim missed the knowing looks leah and beth exchanged after glancing down at hers and alessia's hands.

-----

"are you going to introduce us to your girl or what?" the voice of one kim little rang out as everyone got settled onto the sofas in alessia's living room.

a red flush took over sim's face. sim had been ignoring the way alessia made her feel when they were inhabiting the same space.

she found herself naturally drawn to alessia's blonde hair and blue eyes, to the way her eyes crinkled when she smiled, to her eyelashes and her smile and the soft skin of her hands and the warm embrace of her body. she made sim feel safe and free from judgement.

sim ignored the feeling of warmth she experienced at even the slightest touch from the footballer. she ignored the feeling of satisfaction whenever she managed to make alessia laugh. she brushed all those feelings aside, pushed them down until they were nothing more than a quiet voice at the back of her mind. after all, they'd only known each other a few months and there was no way alessia russo would reciprocate. she was way out of sim's league.

"she's not my girl, but fine. guys, this is sim, she works in media for the national team. she's also a dear friend, so be nice." sim knew her blush would only have gotten worse with the arm alessia had slung over her shoulder. she was grateful that the lights were already dimmed in preparation for the movie marathon, or she would have to deal with relentless teasing from leah and beth. knowing them, they would've roped in lotte as well.

sim waved shyly to the room. most of the team, she'd never met. she'd met lina in passing once at london colney when alessia had asked for a ride after training. the short-haired girl had simply waved at the two before getting into her own car and driving away.

"well, sim, don't just stand there. come make yourself comfortable," leah teased. "and don't worry," she addressed the rest of the team, "once she gets comfortable she's not nearly as quiet."

sim moved to take the open spot next to leah on the ground, leaning against the couch, alessia settling in on her other side.

by the end of the first movie, sim was trying and failing to keep from falling asleep. even worse, every time she nodded off, her head ended up resting on alessia's shoulder.

the 6th time it happened, alessia had had enough. she wrapped her arm around sim's body and pulled her closer, tugging the blanket they were sharing up to cover their shoulders.

sim relaxed slightly, appreciating the warmth surrounding her. if she'd been more alert, she would've had the sense to feel embarrassed. instead, the next time she nodded off, she stayed sleeping.

alessia stilled, not daring to move a muscle in case it woke the younger girl up.

"let her sleep," leah whispered softly. "she's earned it."

alessia nodded in agreement. she brought a hand up to sim's curly hair, carding her hands through in an attempt to keep her sleeping.

while the two shared this peaceful moment, beth leaned off of the couch above them, stretching to grab a photo before sending it to the lioness's group chat.

alessia glanced at the notification on her phone but couldn't bring herself to care for the remarks the rest of her national teammates had already starting making. not with sim's warm body curled up against hers under the blanket. she only hoped the teasing wouldn't scare her away.

alessia was determined to bring sim out of her shell, to find out why the younger girl was trying so hard to keep the team at such a distance.

the team had taken a liking to sim, immediately accepting her as a part of the family. they'd never done so with a member of staff before, but they couldn't help enjoying the time sim spent with them. she did her job with such care and respect for their privacy that they'd wanted to look out for her even without their coach's request.

sim made sure to get their approval before posting something online, wanting to make sure she wasn't crossing boundaries or sharing information that the girls weren't comfortable with having public. she reminded them to rest and recover properly. she never asked questions that made the team uncomfortable. she was so easy to work with and the team had taken her in without hesitation, wanting to return the kindness she was so intent on showing to them.

they would let sim fall asleep on their shoulders any time, anywhere, if it meant the girl got some rest.

leah smiled softly as she watched alessia press a gentle kiss to sim's hair before quietly asking the rest of the team what movie they should play next. the gunners took care to make sure they wouldn't wake anyone up.

sim didn't know it, but she'd found herself a family.

[malachiexists13]

Hi, hello. I'm attempting Kinktober again this year but I couldn't find any lists that I wanted to use. So I made my own by looking at other lists on Google. I'm sharing the list here if anyone else wants to use it-- there's at least three prompts per day so you can pick and choose. Some prompts can be read as being repeats from other days but honestly, it's up to you how you interpret this list.

For anyone who can't see the images/read my handwriting (yes I handwrote this):

DAY 1: Porn Actors AU || Anonymous Sex || One Night Stand

DAY 2: Handjobs || Fingering || Piercings

DAY 3: Orgasm Control || Squirting || Cumming Early (Premature)

DAY 4: Make-Up Sex || Mirror Sex || Bondage

DAY 5: Phone Sex || Guided Touching || Rough Sex

DAY 6: Against A Wall || Sixty-Nine || Creampie

DAY 7: Sensory Deprivation || Sex Toys || Breath Play

DAY 8: Workplace Sex || Car Sex || Desk/Office Sex

DAY 9: Choking || Dacryphilia || Hate Sex

DAY 10: Accidental Stimulation || Humiliation || Clothes On

DAY 11: Wet Dreams || Sexual Fantasy || Femdom

DAY 12: First Time/s || Role Reversal || Dirty Talk

DAY 13: Striptease || Fetish Clothing || Lingerie

DAY 14: Discipline/Punishment || Praise/Degradation || Teasing

DAY 15: Bathroom Sex || Public /Outdoor Sex || Hair-Pulling

DAY 16: Pregnancy Sex || Overstimulation || Lap Dance

DAY 17: Spanking || Roleplay || Blood

DAY 18: Dry Humping || Aphrodisiacs || Intoxication

DAY 19: Begging || Crossdressing || Stomach Bulge

DAY 20: Infidelity/Cuckolding || Threesome || Cunnilingus

DAY 21: Anal/Pegging || Size Difference || Shower/Bath Sex

DAY 22: Breeding || Heats/Ruts || Thigh-riding

DAY 23: Strap-On || Cum Dump || Knotting

DAY 24: Facesitting || Deepthroating || Masturbation

DAY 25: Exhibitionism || Getting Caught || Voyeurism

DAY 26: Double Penetration || Orgy || Switching Partners

DAY 27: Casual Sex/FWB || Monsterfucking || Daddy Kink

DAY 28: Biting/Marking || Jealousy || Possessiveness

DAY 29: Mommy Kink || Blowjob || Blindfolds/Restraints

DAY 30: Cockwarming || Somnophilia || Foreplay/Aftercare

DAY 31: Worship || Sub/Dom || Vanilla Sex || Free Space

As for the requests side and what I plan on doing... Call me ambitious, but I'm willing to write up to two oneshots per day-- different or the same prompt of course. My plan is to write one that I come up with myself, and then write one request. These oneshots will probably end up varying in length though for the sake of my own sanity.

I am going to make a masterlist of sorts to keep track of these oneshots and what prompts I'll be doing-- So here's a second list that I'll be editing to show what prompts I've done, which were requested, and which I will not/didn't do. I'll update this list as soon as the masterlist is done and I start writing. The ones that are crossed out in red are ones that I just won't be doing or accepting requests for.

For anyone who can't see the images/read my handwriting (yes I handwrote this):

DAY 1: Porn Actors AU || Anonymous Sex || One Night Stand

DAY 2: Handjobs || Fingering || Piercings

DAY 3: Orgasm Control || Squirting || Cumming Early (Premature)

DAY 4: Make-Up Sex || Mirror Sex || Bondage

DAY 5: Phone Sex || Guided Touching || Rough Sex

DAY 6: Against A Wall || Sixty-Nine || Creampie

DAY 7: Sensory Deprivation || Sex Toys || Breath Play

DAY 8: Workplace Sex || Car Sex || Desk/Office Sex

DAY 9: Choking || Dacryphilia || Hate Sex

DAY 10: Accidental Stimulation || Humiliation || Clothes On

DAY 11: Wet Dreams || Sexual Fantasy || Femdom

DAY 12: First Time/s || Role Reversal || Dirty Talk

DAY 13: Striptease || Fetish Clothing || Lingerie

DAY 14: Discipline/Punishment || Praise/Degradation || Teasing

DAY 15: Bathroom Sex || Public /Outdoor Sex || Hair-Pulling

DAY 16: Pregnancy Sex || Overstimulation || Lap Dance

DAY 17: Spanking || Roleplay || Blood

DAY 18: Dry Humping || Aphrodisiacs || Intoxication

DAY 19: Begging || Crossdressing || Stomach Bulge

DAY 20: Infidelity/Cuckolding || Threesome || Cunnilingus

DAY 21: Anal/Pegging || Size Difference || Shower/Bath Sex

DAY 22: Breeding || Heats/Ruts || Thigh-riding

DAY 23: Strap-On || Cum Dump || Knotting

DAY 24: Facesitting || Deepthroating || Masturbation

DAY 25: Exhibitionism || Getting Caught || Voyeurism

DAY 26: Double Penetration || Orgy || Switching Partners

DAY 27: Casual Sex/FWB || Monsterfucking || Daddy Kink

DAY 28: Biting/Marking || Jealousy || Possessiveness

DAY 29: Mommy Kink || Blowjob || Blindfolds/Restraints

DAY 30: Cockwarming || Somnophilia || Foreplay/Aftercare

DAY 31: Worship || Sub/Dom || Vanilla Sex || Free Space

As for what characters I'll write for...

[OBEY ME] Lucifer || Leviathan || Belphegor || Solomon || Barbatos

[IKESEN] Mitsuhide Akechi || Mitsunari Ishida || Ranmaru Mori || Kanetsugu Naoe || Kenshin Uesugi || Kicho

[IKEVAMP] Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart || Comte de Saint-Germain || Sebastian || Johann Georg Faust

[IKEPRI] Chevalier Michel || Licht Klein || Gilbert von Obsidian

[IKEVIL] William Rex || Ellis Twilight || Elbert Greetia

[GENSHIN IMPACT] Aether || Venti || Zhongli || Albedo || Xiao || Kaedehara Kazuha || Thoma || Gorou || Shikanoin Heizou || Tighnari || Cyno || Wanderer/Kunikuzushi/Scaramouche || Alhaitham || Kaveh || Lyney || Freminet || Neuvillette || Wriothesley || Kinich

[DEMON SLAYER] Giyuu Tomioka || Obanai Iguro || Michikatsu Tsugikuni || Yoriichi Tsugikuni

[JUJUTSU KAISEN] Choso Kamo

Reminder that just because Kinktober's list of characters is shorter than my regular guidelines, my guideline rules still apply!! You can request extra plot details alongside the kink but for the love of God, nothing remotely incestuous. No stepcest, no sibling x reader x sibling (this applies to Mitsuhide and Kicho too, sorry), and no Scaracest. And no non-con, of course. Just don't be creepy or weird, I guess.

Also reader can be AFAB or AMAB, and can use she/her, he/him, or they/them pronouns. I'm fine writing any.

To submit a request, just send it to my inbox. If you have questions, feel free to leave a comment or my DMs are open.

[thisgameissonintendo]

here’s the thing about me + lockwood content

before lockwood & co. i wasn’t really in the mood for editing. yes, i did come up with videos and photo edits but i wasn’t really enjoying it much. it was the same all over again. a new episode - a new video. don’t get me wrong, i loved the show (still do, it’s magnum p.i. i’m talking about) but i’ve been editing that for years now. 

every now and again a show was coming back with a new season. the umbrella academy for example. i did my usual “new season = one edit with number 5“ and then stopped (because there’s not really much content to use when there’s 50 main characters and you’re only willing to sit down to edit one of them). 

then outer banks came back, i thought “hey, time for a new rafe edit“. he wasn’t in it much. i didn’t come up with a video. fine, okay, back to magnum p.i. (which i still LOVE to death, don’t get me wrong, i would always come up with edits, it’s my 2nd favorite show now) but sometimes it’s nice to have different characters to work with. 

wednesday was released and i really liked that, especially tyler. i made some photo edits and a few videos (4 or something). and what then? back to the old routine? 

no, lockwood & co. was out. i remembered i had seen the trailer a while ago and liked it so i clicked ‘play‘. and look where we are now. i don’t know the last time one character has sparkled any interested in me and got me this motivated. a new one as well, might i add. i don’t do well with new characters since i always have to kinda let them get to me first, you know. it’s quite the process, too, when you want to edit. you have to get the episodes, the scenes you wanna use, you have to select 0.04 seconds from episode 1 and then 0.02 seconds from episode 8 because you think they could work really well together. so it’s a lot to think about even for short videos or photo edits (find the right episode for a certain scene, take screenshots, have ideas of what you wanna do with that screenshot, find good fonts, effects,…) i think you get me. it takes a lot of dedication (for me) to accept a character. and it’s not like i don’t like most of them. i like a lot. for example i’ve enjoyed characters from titans, fate: the winx saga, the sandman, hsmtmts and so on. 

so, what i usually do when i watch a new show is play it in the background. i don’t know any character - i’m not interested in any of them. i press ‘play’ and scroll through instagram or twitter. however with lockwood & co., i didn’t. i had my phone sitting right next to me but i didn’t click on instagram. i didn’t click on twitter. i actually watched the show from the first second on. for some reason it was very special to me, i can’t explain it. it felt like i had found THE show (and character) for me. the one show that could get me back into editing, actually loving what i do and create. and it did. look where i am now. 

i’m very emotional about this, i cannot even find proper words to express how thankful i am for all of this. i wake up in the morning and am excited about the evening because that’s the time of day i 1) have time to re-watch the show 2) read the books (again) or 3) edit. so this whole saving campaign is not only a matter of stopping netfl** bullshit with unnecessary cancelations, it’s also a matter of heart for me. lockwood & co. is my comfort show. i’ve found it after so many years and i didn’t even know i needed one but i did. lockwood & co. is not your ‘typical ghost show’. lockwood is not your typical good-looking, dick-ish protagonist, he’s way more. he’s the reason i’m doing all of this. i’m trying my best to help with whatever i can because they all deserve to come back for at least one more season. so, every day i stay up until 3-4am, get up at 9am the same day and i don’t regret a single thing. i wanna do this. and i know we can all help them get a new season, together.  

it’s been four months (and two days) since the release of lockwood & co. in these four months i’ve been the most creative i’ve ever been, i’ve met the most kind people on social media and i’ve never loved editing more than i do now. and all thanks to anthony lockwood.

[thepringlesofblood]

the summoning choreography chart

lads the autism got me again. we're in npmd lockdown.

I finally managed to figure out which little 'dance' belongs to each Lord In Black in "The Summoning" bc its hard to tell and it was bugging me. here's a vid for reference.

wiggly - space invaders lookin shit probably meant to be emblematic of his mouth tentacles (0:58, 1:52)

nibbly - licks his lollipop - when others do this they mime licking their hand or any other prop they're holding (1:06, 1:15)

blinky - makes a little triangle w his fingers and looks through it (when pokey does this he looks through his mask) in a sweeping left to right motion (his left). (1:12, 4:53)

tinky - both arms out front and then both arms back cross-country skiing vibes (4:58)

pokey - alternates one arm up one arm down giving drama, michael jackson, disco vibes (1:01, 1:09, 1:19, 3:01)

they each start 'out of the depths of hell and back' doing their own dance and then switch around doing each others dances until 'you summon us once, you summon us twice'

when I compared it to the digital ticket version and I was able to determine the exact order of each Lord's choreography

so i made a chart for yall who wanna learn the summoning choreography under the cut.

i need to sleep

glossary of dance moves and the shorthand i used for them.

im not a choreographer. i am bad at describing how people move in space. so. I used timestamps from the reference video from before. please god do not follow my mediocre descriptions - watch the people in the video do it and copy them.

W - Wiggly (0:58, 1:52)

N - Nibbly (1:06, 1:15)

B - Blinky (1:12, 4:53)

T - Tinky (4:58)

P - Pokey (1:01, 1:09, 1:19, 3:01)

SS - shoulder shimmy (1:21, 4:05, 5:12) (the lords in black-ah, the lords in black-ah)

JN - jerky nod (1:25, 2:26, 5:06) (the devil has won it can't be undone)

KK - karate kid (wax on/wax off) (2:29)

KKT - karate kid tree edition - there’s one wax on for each side and then they do a thing in the middle that looks kinda like a tree. Idk how else to describe it thats why i add timestamps. (5:00)

WW - whatever we want (2:57)

TR - tra la la la (the skip they do on Stephanie has got a gun) (4:31) (it's hard to see in this version, i highly recommend checking out the digital ticket version if possible. they show this move first in the proshot bc they focus entirely on steph for the next line, but it does go second in order behind KK - you can see jon start to do KK at the transition into chunk 5 in the ref video, and at the end of the chunk he's bent forward bc he just got done doing the bowing part at the end of TR (you can see pokey doing that like 3 seconds earlier after nibbly does the skipping part)

i divided the song into chunks based on when the singing/dancing starts & stops.

Chunk 1 (0:58-1:31)

Chunk 2 (1:52-2:00)

Chunk 3 (2:26-2:32)

Chunk 4 (2:57-3:04)

(they don't dance on 'we don't give a shit about your phone' but it's b/w these two chunks in case you're interested)

Chunk 5 (4:31-4:37)

Chunk 6 (4:53-end)

The dance changes every two lines-ish, and each time they all change together. they all do the same thing for chunks 3-5 so I only included it on the first one (Pokey)

each lord in black does each move a lil differently so don't sweat if you can't do it the exact same way as the one (1) example I was able to find of x move in the proshot lol

Pokey Chunk 1

P

W

N

B

P

KKT

SS

JN

SS

Chunk 2

P

W

Chunk 3

JN

KK

Chunk 4

WW

P

Chunk 5 (Stephanie has got a gun)

KK

TR

Chunk 6

P

W

KKT

SS

JN

SS

Nibbly Chunk 1

N

B

P

W

T

N

KKT

SS

JN

SS

Chunk 2

N

B

3-5 are the same Chunk 6

N

B

KKT

SS

JN

SS

Wiggly Chunk 1

W

T

N

B

P

W

KKT

SS

JN

SS

Chunk 2

W

T

3-5 same

Chunk 6

W

T

KKT

SS

JN

SS

Blinky Chunk 1

B

P

W

N

T

B

KKT

SS

JN

SS

Chunk 2

B

P

3-5 same

Chunk 6

B

P

KKT

SS

JN

SS

Tinky (curt ATE in this role lets be real)

Chunk 1

T

N

B

P

W

T

KKT

SS

JN

SS

Chunk 2

T

N

3-5 same

Chunk 6

T

P (ooh a break w tradition rip nibbly tho)

KKT

SS

JN

SS

[the-ocean-in-motion]

A post for publicly sharing the products of my Drawfee Lalafell idol project!

(if u don't know what the fuck I'm saying just scroll on)

NOTE: I am not affliated with Drawfee I just stole their logo for that edit. I'm not making money Julia pls don't sue me

FAQ

Q: Why do this? A: Fatal case of brainworms

Q: How long did you spend on making these? A: Too long. Enough questions

Jokes aside, here's a proper intro to what this is for people who aren't in that one very specific discord: As a creative project of sorts, I decided to make 4 Lalafells in FFXIV based on the Drawfee crew (youtubers). SPECIFICALLY these are based on their Newsday Comic Designs, because there's only so much staring at real people's faces really zoomed in I can do before I start feeling like a creep.

So, No, these are not "lifelike" or even "as close to life like as i can make potato people in a 10 year old video game". They're based on stylized ideas of people, warped by my creative liberty. That left me more space to make them cute instead of uncanny valley, which I'm sure any drawfee members that see this post might appreciate too.

They're also all heavily modded. It's more fun for dressup.

With that said! Onwards to the pictures (and design notes)!

Nathan: I actually "made" the beard for this myself - or, rather, I refitted it from a modded beard for Roegadyn. I even made an effort to mold it into a rough flower shape, but I'm afraid it doesn't show up that well. Still, remembering that there is no full beard for Lalafell in the vanilla game, I think it actually looks quite cute! For this "casual" fit I made an effort not to make Nathan look too fashion-y. Of course, they're idol photoshoot style pics, so I still had to dress him up a bit! With this sporty fit with the fun big red boots reminiscent of early video game character designs, I think I landed in a pretty nice middle ground.

Julia: This is the only design I paid real life money to make. I spent forever futzing with free hair mods trying to find one I liked, but in the end I forked over a few bucks to an experienced hair modder's online shop and got this hair that comes with all the features I wanted. Can't say I regret the purchase, it's very pretty. For the outfit, I knew what I wanted pretty much immediately. I have had this outfit mod for a long time, but I've never really known what to use it for. It feels very Julia, even if I can't remember necessarily seeing her wear this kind of thing before. Maybe it just feels French, and I associate Julia with France?

Karina: Karina's face sculpt mod was very easy to decide. Looking at the list of the free female Lala faces, I saw one that looked like a little shit - and named "Give Me the Phone" - and immediately knew it was perfect. I had to edit this hair to become hat compatible for later outfits, but overall this one was full of easy picks. Maybe I'm projecting too hard, though? I even dressed her in a top I modded for myself, after all.

Jacob: Jacob's design is one I agonized over, because finding a hair for him was quite hard. Short hair mods are rarer than long ones, and Newsday Jacob's hair is very distinctive. In the end I had to settle for a more realistic style, but I'm told it still reads as him. I wound up putting Jacob in maybe the cutesy-est outfit of the four. I don't think he'd mind, but either way the funny little overalls were too big a temptation for me to resist. Accessorising with bandages is where my weeb roots really shine through, though. Portraits done, here's the additional materials I've made!

Drawfee Kindergarten Field trip! Fun fact, I took this screenshot mere seconds before the dungeon I used as a set kicked me out, which means I spent the entire instance timer just deciding on accessories and posing! Where are they going? To see the big squid at the Aetherfont's center, of course!

The first music video! Motions not by me, I'm not that talented, these are retargeted Project Sekai dances (retargeting also not by me lmao animation modding scares me)

Childish war is such a fun song and dance, never mind the fact that none of the "personalities" really work for drawfee. It's dancing lalas! Who cares!

That's it! I might do more music videos or photo shoots in the future, but that's highly dependent on my brain chemistry, so truly nothing is certain. If you made it this far, I hope my silly little project brought you some joy! (and olive) And hey!

Check this out!

[laeteria]

It seems I never posted this here, so…

You may, or may have not, stumbled across this video, but yeah… My Tumblr is kinda dead, so I thought it isn't that bad of an idea to drop this one here as well.

There are some notes in the description, so before you go attack me because I haven't added XX role to YY seiyuu, please read the description 👊😔

Some Tumblr exclusive notes under the cut ✨

Why Paradox Live?

Yeah, I know I said I was not posting about Paradox Live anymore and considering the fact that the video was posted in October 2023, it seems pretty recent. However, I have been working on this video for AGES. I think that I will end up in somewhere in 2022(?) starting this video. I was still into Paradox Live and I had dreams to introduce people to it. Too bad that I'm a procrastinator… I mean, I could have chosen IDOLiSH7 as starting point as well, but Paradox Live had a bigger cast :)

My motivation to work on it

Guys, I'm not even kidding. I was planning to use Paradox Live to (hopefully) get some people into Argopro. The project had some difficulties and I wanted to pull people into it, so I did it in a very roundabout way. After all, not a lot of Paradox Live seiyuus are in Argopro like bro what am I even doing!? When starting with the roles of Kajiwara Gakuto (Allen's VA), there were barely any solos for Haruka (his role in Argopro). I remember downloading/ripping the audio of Orthros, because that song was barely introduced. Good old times.

What did I want to achieve with this video?

Guys, I'm just a girl who really likes sharing her interests and I'm a big fan of listening to music of several music projects because I think they are nice and they are different from other music if that makes any sense + you can listen to your favourite seiyuus!!! This was a video for my close friends because I always try to get them to listen to songs or to check out projects. This was merely a tool I used, I guess. My friends love me and I love them. In the end, it wasn't even needed because I post plenty enough on my insta story.

How I made the video

Bros, let me tell you. This was one hell of a dumpster fire of making this video. I'm not kidding. If you think you you can do it, go for it. I will never do it again.

I made the video on my phone. My phone has seen better days, y'all. I first made the template in Ibispaintx and after that I went into YouCut to put the audio over it. I absolutely hated it because you couldn't delete the files if you had the videos in draft (otherwise it will get corrupted which makes sense), but it took a lot of storage. I ended up saving them seperately per character, but the pain I had to go through everytime I made a mistake was painful.

This video is like 22 minutes long, but it took me nearly 2 years to finish it ( •̥ࡇ•̥ )

A little extra for you all <3

I still have the very first version of this video, so I thought, I might as well upload it for others to check out how ewww it kinda is, lmao. It was such a rough draft, but you can't have it all, right? Here is the link (the video is still unlisted, so you won't find it online if you don't have the link).

Another extra, which are the Paradox Live edits (this is a link to my Amino post, so yeah, it's a hell hole ngl) I did 4 years ago. I wanted to use one of them as my thumbnail actually, but I decided not too because people may not be used to that and thus may consider it over the top…