#so like ik rationally that im fine

[secretlyofthefeywild]

maybe someone w a history of extreme paranoia shouldn't listen to true crime while home alone

[sad--tree]

this vacation is not off 2 a good start yall :(

pippin had 2 go in2 hospital the morning that i left bc she'd suddenly gotten really sick and now she's gonna be there for a couple days bc of IV hydration/diagnostics/observation (*scream*)

aforementioned travel sequence from hell

airline FORGOT my suitcase in stockholm (tho supposedly it'll get delivered 2 me tmrw.....)

i FORGOT THE RIGHT PLUG ADAPTOR i brought the uk one by accident instead -_-

and finally, most recently i made a complete and utter fool of myself at the self checkout at the grocery store across the street so now i can Never Ever Go Back There Again

[phagodyke]

I SEE PEOPLE ON THE FLOOR SLIDE INTO THE SEA CANT STAY HERE ANYMORE WE'RE TURNING INTO FIENDS IF I STAY HERE TROUBLE WILL FIND ME IF I STAY HERE ILL NEVER LEAVE..... ‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️

[darlinimamess]

.

[lowkeyrobin]

hello!!

would you be willing to do a TMR minho fic?

basically just them at the little glade treehouse (i live for that treehouse lol) and maybe they stole some food from frypan and are just chatting and having a laugh together whilst cuddling or something bc they dont get to spend alot of time together as he is always in the maze??

(been loving your writing recently btw, literally one of the v few writers who write for MCYTS and respect their boundaries so tysm!!)

hope ur having a good day:)

oh hell yeah brother LMAO ; also thank you and you're welcome!! im all for respecting boundaries because ik how that feels when they're broken + I'm not a weirdo lol, and thank you for appreciating my work, it means sm to me 🫶🫶🫶 ; have a good day/night :) ; post writing me, sorry this is so short :( ; also I know I said I was in trouble but NEVER BACK DOWN NEVER WHAT??

MINHO ; tree house cuddles

summary ; sneaking food into the tree house and having late night convos with minho

warnings ; language

disclaimers ; reader is a track-hoe, Thomas has been in the maze for months and exists, but no Teresa/escaping the maze

word count ; 459

masterlist

You loved your beautiful boyfriend Minho. He was an angel sent from above, truly. Or... maybe below? The box and what existed out of the Glade was confusing, sadly. God, you wished you could remember anything outside of here.

Sadly, you hadn't seen him very much recently.

He'd been busy with his duties in the maze and the Map Room, and you've been busy working in the gardens damn near all day every day. Your rations were running low, the crops were growing slower than ever, and you couldn't figure out why. It's not like there were deer or raccoons feasting on them either. It was just you Gladers here, nothing else. You'd been stressing out over it and needed some time away from it for a while.

Thankfully, the beloved tree house existed, and rarely anyone used it.

You'd stolen a basket of fruit from Fry's kitchen, awaiting the arrival of Minho. Hopefully, Newt stuck to his word, or remembered to, to send Minho to the tree house to spend some time with you.

Thankfully, the beautiful Korean boy showed up, dressed casual and out of the heavy gear he had to wear in the maze. He greeted you with a tired yet warm smile, sitting down with you on the wooden floor.

"Hey, how's your day?" He asks, sitting next to you, shoulder to shoulder.

You hand him a little basket of strawberries. "Fine, I guess." You shrug, "Need a minute away from the gardens"

He nods, "I need a minute away from the shuckin' maze"

You dangle your feet off the side of the platform, soaking up each other's presence.

He pulls you into his lap, between his legs. He rests his chin on your shoulder while his arms rest around your waist. You feel your stomach swarm with butterflies, resting your hands over his.

"I love you" He whispers, placing a kiss on your temple.

"Love you too, dork," you reply with a smile, leaning your head back to rest yourself against him.

"What a romantic" He giggles, pulling you a little closer.

The night continues on in peace, smiles, giggles and kisses shared, hands intertwined. You share your body heat, cuddled up and comfy.

"No, no, no, he said something like he was gonna beat him back into the box! How does that even work? Gally acts like Thomas is some universal threat or something" You laugh as you speak.

"I have no idea, darling." He smiles and chuckles, listening to you ramble on and on about stories he'd missed during the day.

You look up at him and place a kiss on his jawline, a stupid smile on his face.

"Love you"

"Love you too"

"...Thanks for being mine"

"Okay, shut up, shank"

[iravinirattu]

ik im late but im playing through kaveh's hangout event and. the haikaveh brainrot is real

since these losers can't do it themselves i am here to offer my translation services ‼️

al haitham you liar. we are in a library using our indoor voices you did NOT hear us.

and even if you did mr. "i hate small talk" why'd u walk over hmm?? hmm??

"dont mind if i ignore you, i've got my earphones in" <- applies to everyone except kaveh

"okay now that i've gotten him distracted tell me what's wrong so i can discreetly fix it"

mans literally sent kaveh away to boost his confidence a bit + find out if he was okay.

"you annoted those books with such long and beautiful notes that eveyone hated lolol anyways check out those shelfs where there's a book with someone appreciating ur notes"

i can't get over how many exceptions al haitham makes for kaveh. he's not heartless and cruel in the way i often see him portrayed... but at the same time his entire demeanor is "i respect you as a person but won't go out of my way to do things for you unless it benefits me"

like he's one of the only characters who isn't super super close with the traveler, at least that's how i see it in the voicelines! he respects them as a friend, would consider doing things for them if they asked, but that's about it really!

but KAVEH. for someone who enjoys a peaceful life and has such a rational and efficient way of working it theoretically makes no sense for him to do all the things he does for kaveh.

like sure "maybe the cheering up kaveh is just to avoid having to deal with him drunk later", but that's too roundabout of a demeanor to be al haitham's style. plus, if he really didn't want to deal with a drunk kaveh, he could just kick him out.

but he doesn't because he cares, and kaveh does not understand that because he has created a vision of what he thinks al haitham is in his head, and in that vision he, kaveh, has no value so why would haitham have him around?? clearly he's got ulterior motives.

and they won't move further until kaveh lets go of that vision, and he can only do that if he truly realises his own worth, and until then haitham's gonna have to keep pushing him towards that from the shadows.

"he overworks himself, it's not healthy. he forgets the practicality of his ideals when he starts something, thinking he can pull through it, but reality hits him halfway. he can keep his ideals, that's fine, but i wish he was a bit more realistic about them."

"and despite all of the above, despite wanting to uphold his artistic integrity, he still puts everyone's needs before his own."

"his approach is too contradictory, and hence people don't see his talent. there are those who's resolve is so brash they are seen as confident and unshakable; and yet he who is more talented than them all falls behind because he's so easy to take advantage of."

al haitham taught me two new words today lol

irascible - someone with a quick temper

paragon - something viewed as a standard

"if he wants things to change he needs to find a balance between compromise and resolve. there is no way to please everyone, but instead of accepting this, he thinks he can nullify it if he takes all the burden instead."

kaveh's altruism stems from his own self-hatred, moreso than his desire to help others. and while doing a good deed puts a smile on his face, the melancholy guilt that trips him when he doesn't is far greater.

"if they are his ideals then i have no right to say anything about them. but he hurts himself so much as a result of that and i wish he would love himself a bit more."

al haitham has a great deal of respect for kaveh, not just as a scholar but as a person. and it's hard watching someone like that dig their own grave, and there's nothing you can do but wait in the sidelines, because they won't believe anything you say.

al haitham is constantly bickering with kaveh to get him to feel a little, challenge his ideals, find a way to make them work without sacrificing himself in return.

"at this poing talking to him is no use, he's convinced himself that his life only has purpose if it's in the hands of others. all people face hardships in life, but he seems to believe he deserves all he gets and more"

and then after kaveh is back he gives him space to talk about things that make him happy, and more importantly, appreciate himself.

how to tell kaveh i want to listen to his silly lil rants without sounding like a sap - al haitham's brain, probably

al haitham knowing all of kaveh's little buttons, and pressing the right ones after determining his mood, so he can show kaveh he loves him but still sound like a bitch.

"you did so well. i am so proud, and i hope you are proud of yourself too."

and sometimes he does click the wrong one, but then immediately goes back on it, becomes soft(er than usual), offers reassurance, changes the topic, and so on

we saw this in the parade of providence event, when kaveh got legitimately upset at one of haitham's remarks and he immediately went into I HAVE UPSET MY BF recovery mode.

and what i love the most in all this is KAVEH'S DUMBASS IS SO OBLIVIOUS TO THIS LMAOOO

but also it's sad because the reason he's oblivious is because he doesn't think he's worth being cared for like that.

haikaveh's whole vibe is "i love you, but i'd much rather you love yourself first" and "i'm your one and only, your only exception, the one you'd break all your rules for" and i love it.

[ashecampos]

ANYONE BUT HER 7

JANIS IMI-IKE X FEM READER

a little Regina x reader

Warnings - swearing, mentions of cheating, mentions of anxiety. Regina being Regina. Hurt. Angst

The POV switches between reader and Janis (I use — when I change the POV)

there will be more parts to this, make sure to reblog and comment and I will get the next few parts up as soon as I can, happy reading lovelies 🫶🏼

———————————————————

TALES OF TESSA MAKE SURE TO READ THIS AND PREVIOUS PARTS BEFORE THIS, LINKED IS FROM THE POV OF TESSA (readers best friend)

———————————————————

I am startled awake by a familiar vibration next to my head, i squint to see who’s phone is ringing, of course it is mine. I groan and sleepily wiggle out of Janis’ arms, grabbing my phone while exiting the room to take the call, I find my way to the bathroom again and sit against the bathtub, answering the call not bothering to read the caller ID, assuming it’s Tessa or Damien.

“Y/n?” The person on the other end asks, as if they knew there would be a chance someone else could’ve answered. I instantly freeze up recognising the voice on the other side of the phone call. “B..Bea? Why the fuck are you calling me?” I say as I start to pace back and forth. “I know im the last person you want to hear this from but I was told you have been seeing Janis Imi’ike, im so sorry y/n” she says, obviously putting what she needs to say off. “Just spit it out bea, whatever you must say, say it” i speak with a sense of urgency “me and Janis have been seeing eachother in secret for a few months now, she had admitted she only helped you that night to make sure you broke up with me” she says. I search for a reason for her to be lying about this but come up with nothing, all rational thoughts gone. I make quick work of ending the call and storming back into the room where me and Janis were peacefully sleeping not even five minutes prior. I grab my hoodie and jeans, throwing them on, I then grab my shoes and leave.

One foot after the other I make a run from it. Like I ran from bea when she cheated. Like I’ve ran from every situation that’s caused me pain. I make my way back to my house, seeing a figure sat on my poarch, it seems they had saw me before i got the chance to see them. The person stands up and walks over. Only now do I realise the hot, sticky tears running down my cheeks causing my ability to make out the person falter. I desperately rub my face using the sleeves of my hoodie, silently praying it’s not my mom who is the one to see me like this. Thankfully I see blonde hair. Bleached blonde hair. Regina George.

She makes her way over, her pace quickening when she sees the state im in. “Oh y/n what happened? Are you okay? Did someone hurt you?” She bombards me with questions while gripping my chin and tilting my head up to look at my face properly. A frown upon her own. “I’m fine I just want to be alone, go see Aaron or something Regina” I choke out trying to hold back the tears threatening to pour again. She shakes her head, unhanding my face and instead grabbing my hand, dragging me into the house. And up the stairs into my room. “Jesus y/n why is your room so dark. No wonder you’re so pale..no offence” she says while running to my curtains, pulling them open and allowing the natural light inside. I wince at the brightness of the morning sun.

She sits me down on my bed, leaning closer to me. “So tell me what’s got you so upset?” She says gently and in a genuine tone. So I tell her everything. I mean it’s Regina George. She may be seen as the ‘queen bee’ but honestly she’s never been bad to me or my brother so I trust her.

“So let me get this straight. She got you to break up with your ex so she could get with her then continued to see the both of you behind each other’s backs? Oh my god. I’m going to kill her” the blonde says while grabbing her phone out of her pocket and aggressively typing away. After a few seconds she looks up and smiles sadly “you’re gonna sit with me and my group at lunch now, trust me she won’t bother you baby.” She says while putting her phone away.

——-

I wake up and stretch, extending my arms out, feeling the surface of the sofa to find it empty. My eyes shoot open looking for the girl. She’s nowhere to be seen. I groggily stand up and head for the bathroom. She wasn’t there either. I sigh assuming she got asked to run some errands by her mom or something. I turn some music on and start to move the basement back to how it was before the date.

The day goes by so fast. The day turns into the next and then the next. No word from y/n at all. She must just be busy.

Entering school on the Monday was probably one of the worst decisions of my life. First everyone was looking at me. Then I got to my locker and there she was at hers. She sees me and walks away quickly. I frown assuming she was just in a mood with it being so early in the day or something like that.. until I see Damien and Tessa storming over. “Janis ‘Imi’ike I have known you for fifteen years but this. This is a new low even for you” the boy starts. “Tell me this is some sick joke right now Janis I swear to god” Tessa says almost immediately after Damien. I look at them taken aback at their sudden disgust and anger toward me. “Can someone please tell me what I done?” I say slamming my locker shut, staring both of them down. “you used her to fuck her ex. Janis I thought you genuinely liked her” Tessa snapped before Damien could say anything “what are you talking about? I do like her. And I despise bea” I say, frowning. “well the morning after you and her had that date night, I got a call from Regina telling me to haul ass to y/N’s house because the poor girl was hysterical, turns out Bea had called her and told her everything about you and… oh fuck, it’s a setup. We need to get to y/n before they do anything else”

——-

These past few days Regina has been the nicest I’ve ever known her to be, yes she is the ‘queen bitch’ of north shore but she’s always been nice to me for some reason. After what happened the other day, she’s only been nicer. I haven’t really spoke to anyone about what happened. I kinda went off the radar until Tessa turned up at my house demanding to know why I hadn’t been answering. Naturally I broke down and told her everything and after reassuring her (a lot) that i would be okay, she left to go home and sleep for school. Aaron didn’t really care about what happened. Not that I really told him. Yes he’s my twin, I’ll always love and be there for him but we don’t really associate with each other anymore. So when I woke up this morning I decided to ‘suck it up’ as my dad would say. I threw on a hoodie and some baggy jeans. Then Regina called me. “Hey short stuf- oh Jesus please tell me you aren’t wearing that?!” She nearly screams down the phone, I cringe looking down at my outfit earning a sigh from her. “I’ll be over in five, do your makeup and I’ll pick some clothes for you when i get there okay?” She asks in a sweet tone. I smile and nod before hanging up and grabbing a joint I rolled last night ready for today. I stare down at it for a few minutes contemplating what im going to do if Janis approaches me today. I haven’t spoke to her since the phone call. I didn’t confront her, I just ran. Shaking my head I light up and take a few drags of the blunt with laying on my bed, all tasks out of sight and mind.

By the time I finished the joint, Regina is in my room and looking through my closet, she looks over at me her smile fading while she grabs an outfit that fits ‘plastic’ standards, but is still in my style. Then she comes and sits next to me on the bed. “So what’s the plan?” She speaks before I can, I shrug “go into school and show her who she messed with” I say in a mocking tone earning a smack over the back of my head from the blonde, she laughs and drags me off of my bed, keeping a tight hold on my wrist to keep me steady. She drags us into my closet and sits me down, pulling my hoodie off and replacing it with an old band shirt I made into a cropped vest, she smirks and grabs my backpack, throwing it at me. She grabs my hand and we are out of the door, in her jeep and on the way to school.

I stand at my locker waiting for Regina to find Gretchen and Karen and come back to get me so she can introduce me to them. Looking up from my phone I see Janis, I roll my eyes and walk the other way, not wanting to start a fight twenty minutes before homeroom. I pull out my phone and call Regina to ask where she is.

Minutes later im stood with the plastics. Gretchen looks me up and down trying to figure me out, while Karen just stands there smiling at me. “I love your shirt, where can I get one?” Gretchen starts off, I smile with a little bit of a blush forming “oh uhm I made it actually” I say looking at the shirt I made a few weeks ago just after meeting Janis. The girls eyes light up as she leans closer “omg so your like an artist and a musician, that’s so fetch” she bounces with excitement. A laugh erupts from beside me “what’s fetch?” Regina asks cringing a little. “Oh it’s like slang from some movie I saw” the girl explains the plot of the movie, I smile at her and her little quirks “well that movie sounds fetch, we will have to watch it one time, right Regina?” I nudge the blonde, knowing how mean she can be towards Gretchen at times. Karen looks over my shoulder and gasps a little. We all turn around to see the commotion. Tessa and Damien are shouting at Janis. I guess Tessa told Damien. Well at least they’ve got to her before I could. Not that I’d even know what to say. “Hey cmon we should get to PE so we can get changed out of sight from the creeps” Regina tugs my arm. I know she’s never early for anything, which lets me know that she is only suggesting that so I wouldn’t have to see Janis. She grabs onto my hand as we all walk to the changing rooms. I drop my bag to the floor and pull off my vest, replacing it with the track hoodie I originally had put on. I change into some shorts and put on my not so white converse. Once we are all changed, we sit on the benches outside of the changing rooms, waiting for the bell to ring and for everyone to come to class, I put my hair in a messy bun before looking up to see two faces laced with shock “you have a tattoo?” Karen says with a smile, earning a confused look from me “you guys don’t?” I answer the question with another question, they all shake their heads making me laugh, I shrug the interaction off and pull on the strings of my hoodie.

The bell eventually chimes and people start flooding into the changing rooms, Janis and Damien included, the both of them are glared at by the three girls while I stare at the floor. The coach shows up, smiling at me, waving his arms around like a goof “y/n congratulations on last weeks race kid” he enthusiastically says before patting my back. “Thanks, hope the next one is just as easy” I laugh a little. To say track is stressful would be an understatement. Some people join to have something to put on their college forms, some join because they love sports, me, I joined because my dad wanted me to be apart of every hobby, he wants me to have as many skills as possible. I know he means good but the pressure to be the best at everything is crushing. I get snapped out of my thoughts when Regina’s hand holds onto mine, I look around and see people leaving to head to the field, I look at Regina and she mouths “you okay?” towards me, I simply nod, I wasn’t about to scare off the person who offered me a safe space this fast.

Approaching the field I see the teacher is holding a bag full of equipment, I look over at Tessa knowing what’s in the bag. Fucking rugby balls. I’ve never liked rugby but Tessa on the other hand. She loves it. It’s her whole life. She has been scouted by professional teams since we were kids. Me on the other hand, not the type of person to tackle people, I would happily just stick to track.

I look up to see Tessa running over to me, a massive grin on her face. “Y/n cmon we are doing rugby” she waves a ball in my face like an excited child. I look over to where she is pointing and see Damien and Janis, I frown and shake my head a little “wait T you aren’t in this class, why are you here?” I laugh a little knowing she is meant to be in English language class right now. Once again she waves the ball in my face “coach pulled me out asking if I would help with some tackling drills.” She nudges me before going to grab me to go see Janis. “Actually im going to stay here and help the plastics” I mumble knowing she won’t like me hanging around with Regina. “What why? Your not like in love with my cousin right?” She crosses her arms and stares at me “you and Janis need to talk. Sooner than later I suggest” she lectures me just as the coach blows the whistle.

Me and Tessa both get forced to grab a tackle practice pad and hold them up ready for the coach to tell people to try tackling us both. A lot of them don’t try to tackle too hard, a few manage to push me back a little but one manages to knock me. Regina. She stands staring at me like a predator scoping out its prey, she then gets a running start, getting lower to the ground with every stride closer she gets and eventually she has her arms around my torso and she manages to buckle my legs and she’s on top of me, smirking down at me with a satisfied grin. “Falling for me already huh?” She leans closer to my face with a cheeky grin, we stay like this for a few seconds before she gets off of me and we both stand up. I take my place back at the line, bag in hand ready to go.

I tilt my head to the side and see Tessa and Janis laughing, Tessa looks over at me with a sympathetic expression, it seems like she knows more about this situation than she’s letting on.

Once the lesson is practically done and everyone is walking off of the field I jog a little to catch up with Tessa and nudge her. “Hey can I grab you for a sec after we are changed I need to tell you something?” She says with a sad smile, she glances at Janis and Damien who are a few feet in front of us, then she looks at Regina and the plastics who are a few feet behind us. “Omg yes, I feel like I haven’t seen you since last week, sorry for going off the rails though” I frown feeling as if im to blame for this situation “that’s actually what I need to te- …oh hey Regina” she starts before Regina comes and joins us causing her to quickly change the topic of conversation. “Hey Tes, you should totally come sit with us, y/n has finally agreed to sit with me and the girls” Regina almost brags, a massive grin plaster across her pretty face.

[desolateburgr]

mental illness is crazzy cus one minute im like fine and the next im starving myself to be closer to the earth and contemplating burrying my used pads in the earth ,, for unknown extremly irrational spiritual reasons.

I hate when people tell me to just be rational because i literally cant. My rational in my brain and how i operate on a day to day basis is completley differnt from the average persons (ik everyones differnt blah blah blah but not everyone suffers from one if the most difficult to live with mental disorders ok!).

"just be rational" ok so now I will do something dangerous or stupid or wrong or the long complicated stupid way and ethier harm myself or embarrsess myself ,, probably both but hey at least i was being rational!!!!

I hate my brain and how no one actually understands how hard daily life is for me and assumes my life is ok not good but ok but really its kind of extremly shit.

TLDR: fuck ocd

[kusundei]

like realistically why was i here? i thought abt it more and more as i just sat there. savannah got to go see her family . ayden of course will spend time with his and ajax is with his family but at the same time i separated him from his dad. and i am here with people that r not my family. if i were to be specific theyre like my future in-laws or whatever cheesy bs but regardless im still ajaxs bf. as fucked up as my family is theyre still my family and i do unfortunately resonate with how i grew up and the way my family is and etcetc. we’re all messed up and horrible people but thats what makes us family? we still manage to come together and enjoy our time for a while and i just miss my mom a lot and it makes me wanna die because why do i miss her when i shouldnt and then it draws back into a sort of like? well do i regret it? i dont but why do i keep thinking abt it. and ik why i do because thats just how i am. ill always think abt other possibilities and if i stayed home ik what would have happened and it just would have sucked and i probably wouldve relapsed or something and then id be fucked for sure. but i keep having those evil dreams but im just trying to correlate it with winter and that it’ll all go away once january-february ends. my life is fine and im fine. theres nothing wrong with me and im NOT getting worse and its just the timing. oh and my period just makes it so much worse ebecause why would you come back NOW like just tell me to die hecause you already have me feeling like this and then u put another thing on me. and ive been so like hormonal and everything hurts and all i want to do is cry. and pairing that with the ‘i dont want to do anything + all i want to do is lay in bed forever’ does not. help me. at all. i feel like ive placed myself in this weird perpetual loop with myself where i grieve and then hate myself and then get over it and then grieve again. ive always grieving. im grieving everything. and its so hard for me to again not blame myself because ive tried so hard my whole life to just not exist and cause no problems?? and of course i have becayse clearly all ive done is that growing up but still? now im stuck where i cant tell if i should blame myself. and they dont understand and i realize more and more that maybe my family elly doesnt know who i am if all theyre doing is reducing it to ‘just a phase’. I wouldve never done this. im much more rational than that. i dont make big jumps like this withput thinkint abt it heavily and i also hate change

i keep trying not to think abt it but . i tried i think. but it just makes me so sad and maybe its my fault? i didnt reach out but i genuinely dont know whats going on over there and im just so??? upset? bittersweet? not really sweet just sort of bitter. im just sad cause i think i just wanted them to care. i just keep having to be like well i did this to myself over n over again but its hard because i cant tell if im allowed to acknowledge and blame other people? why did it happen like this and why is it like this? i miss my family but why does it feel like nobody cares? did they all have a party or did they cancel it? i miss my family and it makes me sick. i miss my mom and i know i shouldnt but i really do. regardless of whatever shit i go through i still miss her and its so awful. i forget how suicidal christmas time makes me and i guess its over now but its so much worse because its NOT christmas anymore. why did nobody greet me? why am i here and not at home? of course its nice because i have someone to spend christmas with and a family that takes me in and treats me like everyone else but i hate having that imprint and i cant shake yhe feeling that its all conditional (which regardless if it is , i shouldnt be sad abt that in the first place) of course im glad i got gifts and they cared enough to give me stuff but it makes me so much more sad and i will never shake that guilty feeling. im always going to feel guilty and yes these r nice things but everything is laced with it and im not going to be able to fight that?? ever?? im happy i can be here and i could spend christmas with ajax and feel okay but regardless i wish i could just go home. id have sucked it up and dealt with it just to feel like they care. because id like to believe they all do and i cant tell if its me pushing them away more or if theyre just doing it just cause? why did we wake up at 3pm? im just so sad and i dont feel like i can convey it at all. im so afraid of everything i feel being interpreted wrong but i feel like ive been more visual abt everyrhing more than ive ever been. and it sucks.

[train-inthedistance]

—

[waveswept]

social anxiety is such fucking ass im gonna scream is this like. a normal healthy person emotion or is this just me being Fucked Up

[phagodyke]

nvm im too tired and overstimulated for this shit

[waterloggedsoliloquy]

#the way people treat faro is so absurd tbh#shes reduced to Mean Lesbian so often#or the tired third wheel to the popular ship#which is seen so often in the women of the thrawn trilogy tbh!!!#ar'alani and pryce fall into this as well#with pryce i get it Sometimes. shes a jerk. but people ignore every other aspect of her character and that SUUUUCKS#faro is interesting because shes in a sense the model imperial officer#frankly id love to see her and GA sloane work together i think they'd mesh well#considering they both seem very much dedicated to the empire without the rank-climbing#ik she talks back but its never against the empire its always what she views as an improvement#or criticism as what she deems bad#but at the same time shes pretty good at doing what shes told and i love that for her#shes good at her job and isnt afraid to let superior officers know when she disagrees#i stg sometimes it feels like the majority of people read the thrawn books for shipping purposes#which is fine im not gonna say theres a wrong way to enjoy things. and i do partake in sw shipping myself so i get it#but sometimes! it would be nice! if people had a brain about the things they said about the characters that arent in their main ship#not even gonna put this on my sw sideblog#bc everytime i talk about thrawn there the most annoying people materialize into my notes from @hoooble

if nobody got me i know YOU got me

there's a theory that while total conjecture seems to play out, wherein a fandom will create content not seen in the original work, and often comes off as the completely opposing tone. so ppl who read a Military Science Fiction mystery novel will create massive amounts of shipping bc that doesnt exist in the work as it stands. and then on top of that the shipping draws people in, and ppl will try to enter those books and find it Very Much Not Shippy despite the shipping goggles strapped to their eyes. very weird phenomenon. and it makes it harder for me who reads Military Science Fiction for the fact that its military science fiction and i want to enjoy the characters in that context!!! TT_TT especially since faro is ALIVE WITH CHARACTERIZATION and shes the eyes through which we see the vast majority of alliances and a good chunk of treason! she's a primary point of view character! i think we spend more prose engaging with her interiority than almost any other pov character. ppl relegate her to the Mean Lesbian and/or Rational Female Friend when her actual character is actually so much more interesting and funny. bc she IS rational but not in an "entertaining the boys nonsense" way that is shorthand for 'mom' but more like seeing thrawn climb into a bear enclosure (starting arguments with vader) and going "oh so my boss is fucking insane. i will not be doing that" and turning to look away before she gets a coronary

i need more ppl to read the thrawn books it cant just be me and lestat as the only Faro Appreciators

[caruliaa]

hmm girlies we may have acted a bit irrationally earlier this week. lol

[relaxxattack]

lol whenever i got like, super annoyed w/ the syndicate or esp like, phil/techno's attitudes i kinda just, try to think of it as like. they've done so much, they've destroyed so much that held so much value and essentially scattered the whole server. like ik the the reason why it was so dead post Doomsday was bc alot of CC's being busy but i thought it was interesting translating into dsmp lore bc its like. the c!'s dont go out anymore! they dont associate w/ each other bc they dont want to become the next lmanberg or bc of bad blood from doomsday and. they hide in their bases trying to avoid rocking the boat and getting the syndicate's attention. u know phil and techno strike me as the types who HATE being wrong. they always know what's best, they're condescending, and they won't acknowledge any wrongdoings or they'll rationalize it. and doomsday was supposed to be the pinnacle of their argument, them fixing wrongs and all the bad things on the server. and u know what got better? jack shit ^_^. and they're not stupid enough to not notice that, but what're they gonna do? admit they fucked up on such a big scale? how do u come back from that? so they just keep barreling down this road and phil and techno r kinda each other's worst enablers lmao at times so its just. this huge mess man. ofc the moment phil or techno talk abt lmanberg im just "nope :) no (imagined) nuance for u good sirs :)"

i agree w most of this except the end half because phil at the very least genuinely believes people are better off now without lmanberg. of course this means he knows jack shit about tommy tubbo jack fundy and niki, but, we kind of knew that already lol

i would figure techno feels the same way. they literally just don’t pay proper attention to anyone else in the universe. which is fine! i understand that! i wouldn’t want to keep tabs on 30 people i didn’t know that well either! but like… maybe you should’ve known a Little More about them before you decided destroying their home would make them happier. and then claiming they are happier. when they are very Obviously…. not

[420technoblazeit]

Yeah, and how Angie is writing makes it hard to write her in fanfiction, because we need to try to limit the racist shit, while trying to make sure she is still similar to Angie.

Bad she had some interesting concepts, like someone who uses religion to cope with the killing game, or how she might have a tighter mask than Kokichi, it's a shame that the writers had to be like That

oh my god tumblr deleted my whole fuckign draft but im going to rewrite it just for u anon. i said this during my stream of the second trial i think but the way i see the drv3 cast, you can divide them into two different coping methods for the killing game

you have A, people who put aside their emotions in pursuit of the truth and often come across as cold and unfeeling as result. the extreme of this would obviously be kokichi who sacrifices gonta in the fourth trial despite having worked with him throughout the whole game. and he does end up regretting it and i'd argue it's a big factor for his suicide plan in the fifth chapter, but the fact remains that he still went through with it. miu has a similar coping mechanism post chapter one, where she refuses to trust anyone and remains suspicious of the whole class up until her death. to cover up her fear she constantly accused people to the point of being obnoxious and as a result she didn't really have any friends in the end other than kiibo. shuichi starts the game in this category and eventually through kaito moves into the second category which is

B, people who choose emotion over rationality. ik someone in the inbox said they found this to be the most frustrating part of the game and admittedly yeah, it gets annoying sometimes especially considering the stakes of the game. kaito is the extreme case of this, which is what made chapter 5 so interesting to me because of his collaboration with kokichi. this category mostly involves putting blind faith in someone despite the presented evidence and it definitely walks a fine line. tenko was also very similar in the way she relentlessly defended himiko even though a murder happened in the middle of her talent show. maki also eventually switches to this category in her desperation to defend kaito during the fifth trial

so to have a deeply religious character, when the basis of religion is faith without evidence, be logically based and push her emotions aside in the process is really interesting. and it's really disappointing that the writers decided to squander that potential by being racist instead