#so its usually fairly easy to tell if its a 'good' day or a 'bad' day right off the bat

[tangledinink]

oouggh swanatello has been consuming my brain and its your fault,, /pos

actual question tho, have swanatello's bros tried explaining to him that they're his brothers? and if so, howd he react?

If Swanatello doesn't recognize them when they come to visit him, and they don't obey his commands to leave and try to convince him of their identities... in a best-case scenario, he will ignore them entirely and drive them off regardless. More commonly, he will grow confused and upset by their arguments. (Because now part of his brain is screaming at him that he DOES know them-- and the other part is screaming at him that he DOESN'T, and he doesn't know who to listen to.) They are now, to him, not only dangerous threats that must be driven away, but also actively causing him harm and distress, and he will only grow more aggressive and violent as a result. These scenarios have resulted in some of the worst injuries for his siblings.

[kuronanox]

Domestic life - Hybrid Grimmjow Jaegerjaquez

"Well fortunately we have these hybrids that are to be put down in a few days if you don't like the other selections." A man in his forties tells (Your Name) as he opens the door to another hall with different hybrids, males and females. "A lot of them are all bark no bite. They still want to see another living day. Give them another chance in life and you'll see how amazing theses creatures are." He genuinely says with fondness petting some from outside the cage letting her walk around and decide. "Thanks give me a few minutes I would like to look around."

She was amazed with some of the hybrids. There were talks that people kept hybrid for sports or they were treated poorly in society. She felt sadden with the state of the world and decided she would like to keep one until it was ready to leave her house and starts its life anew again. She thought maybe adopting would be a great idea for some of these hybrids that needed a little love but ultimately she decided to buy one to set free later.

While walking up and down the aisle she came across some that didn't seem aggressive or others that didn't seem to care of her presence. There was one in particular that caught her eyes. A blue and white panther asleep in its cage with his body curled up in an awkward position. His description read that he was used for sport and was filed to be put down for misbehavior and his aggressiveness.

"I want this one." She tells the sales man as he gives her a worried look of her choice of hybrid. Panthers can be aggressive and closed off. They also are not good for starting families as they can get possessive of their owners.

Grimmjow ears perks up from the small conversion outside his cage as he opened his sleepy eyes to take a glimpse. "Must be the those pest coming to kill me" he thinks as he slowly processes his surroundings before his ears fully perk up.

"But I want him, I've had experience with aggressive hybrids in the past. You said some of them needed another chance and I want to be the one to give it to him." Grimmjow hears the female voice say with aggression towards the sales man who he's come to dislike. Any person who has came to buy him the sales man has told them no because he was too much to handle.

Irritation overcame Grimmjow as he lunged towards the sales man and hissed baring his teeth. "See I think Grimmy agrees with me!" (Your Name) proudly says with her hands on her hips beaming with pride.

"Tch the hell is this women talking about?"

The sales man sighs and looks at her crazy before giving up and nodding. "Alright but we have some paperwork to fill and also I'm giving you a number to call if he decides to attack you. Don't say I didn't warn you."

The process was fairly easy, Grimmjow had all his shots and was in a healthy state. They had to sedate him a few times because he had injured a few staff but after spending weeks here the aggression had settled down.

"He's not too bad honestly, give him time to adjust and he won't give you a hard time. He keeps to himself." A hybrid name Nel says from behind the desk as she typed in all the information needed for (Your Name) and her new hybrid Grimmjow.

"Thanks I'll keep that in mind."

When Grimmjows cage opened he didn't move, he thought maybe the sales man worked his magic and convinced the women he wasn't worth saving but he opened his eyes again to see her waiting for him to leave his cage. The feeling was foreign usually they had chains put onto him so he wouldn't escape but she was letting him walk free. Grimmjow wasn't gonna complain she bought him so he was gonna use all her stuff for free and finally get some rest from all these other hybrids giving him a headache. Well he did feel a little sorry for some to never see the light of day again.

Grimmjow in his animal form slowly checked his surroundings before making his way out the cage. "Well you're gonna live with me now. Let's go home." (Your Name) softly says allowing him to walk freely without chains or a leash.

Grimmjow stalks her from behind before ultimately getting bored she wasn't frightened of him. He was asleep most the car ride home. The cage was too noisy of other hybrids talking, yelling or crying. It was nice listening to white noise for once. As the car came to an abrupt stop Grimmjow growled at her for disturbing his sleep.

She paid no mind to him opening the door and letting Grimmjow out. "Come on, the car's comfortable but not as comfortable as a house." She tells him.

A house, he doesn't remember a time he's been in one. Stalking after her once again he was fast to check his surroundings before making his way in.

"Home sweet home!" She calls to him running to the couch to lay down. "By the way, I know hybrids can be in their animal and human form but don't feel pressured to change if you don't want to. I also know you can talk." (Your Name) tells Grimmjow as he walks around the house giving it a good sniff, checking if it's safe.

With nothing much to do he ignores her and hops onto the other couch closing his eyes. Grimmjow checks off that she was no danger to him and he could easily kill her if she tried something.

"Kay well I'll start dinner and show you to your room." (Your Name) says before leaning towards the kitchen and opening the fridge.

He didn't care, he was gonna freeload off her and make this home his whether she liked him or not.

Grimmjow dozed off to sleep again before he smelt something delicious catch his nose. They say curiosity killed the cat and he couldn't help but leap off the couch to investigate the delicious smell. His walks were silent as he stalked towards the kitchen.

(Your Name) was searing chunks of meat for him as he watched from afar. She was listening to music from her speakers while reading a recipe off her phone. While turning to plate everything up she felt startled from Grimmjow watching her. He was so quiet she didn't hear his footsteps.

"Oh jeez don't scare me like that, I could have dropped our dinner." She scowls a bit before pouting and placing it on the table.

Grimmjow smirks at her reaction before inching his way towards the food.

She set it on the floor and he gives her a demanding look. "What? You don't want to change out of that form and you're too big to sit on a chair so you have to eat from the floor."

He rolls his eyes mentally at her before taking the pieces of meat and ripping them to sheds. The food was good, he couldn't get enough of it. Before Grimmjow knew it the food was already gone and he was looking up at her with angry eyes. (Your Name) was lost in thoughts answering emails that a paw swiped her leg.

She looked down to see the food gone and she softly chuckled before getting up and getting some chicken she had stored. "Here, eat up." She tells him before finishing her dinner as well.

Grimmjow room was nice, the bed was big there was a drawl and desk as well as clothes. What most excited him the most was the pillows and blankets but he would never let her know that part. His tail was happily twitching but if (Your Name) saw she didn't comment on it.

"Kay well this is where the problem lays. You reek and need a shower." She tells him as Grimmjow turns to growl at her but she throws up a water sprayer to his face.

"Don't threaten me now or I'll spray you with water." She says as Grimmjow hissed and the water she sprayed hits his tongue and he retaliates from it.

Without much of a fight Grimmjow eventually gets into a tub of water and lets her wash him. Although he isn't so happy and his ears are down.

(Your Name) was calm as she scrubbed him lightly and made sure not to touch his sensitive parts. "There, isn't so bad is it? Promise you'll be safe here." She tells him as Grimmjow looks at her with eyes that are unreadable.

With the night getting late she leaves him to his room and leaves him alone for the rest of it.

"Good night." She tells him before going into her room for the rest of the night.

After a few months their routine was pretty standard and much didn't change. (Your Name) would feed him a big breakfast before leaving to work and returning during her breaks to feed him again before leaving again. Grimmjow was feeling a little lonely without her yapping at him. She yapped about the most random things he didn't understand. He still appreciated having her as company sometimes. Grimmjow never spoke to her though, he was frustrated that (Your Name) was getting under his skin. Pride settled into him most days and when he wanted something he would put a paw on her or nudge his head across her legs.

One evening she came home very late and Grimmjow was not happy at all. He was expecting to give her a hissy fit by destroying one of her pillows but she came home in tears sobbing about her job and some coworkers being mean. Grimmjow guessed she had a bad day as he watched her lay in bed ignoring his presence.

"Not now Grimmjow, I've had a rough day. You probably don't even care." She says with eyes closed and tears falling into her pillow.

"Stupid women." He thinks before jumping into her bed and laying his head on her tummy offering comfort. Grimmjow feels warm, he likes her enough not to throw a fit anymore. A hand reaches out behind his ears as she scratches them and he purrs a little.

"This is the first time I've heard you purr Grimmjow." She says surprisingly as he stops and flicks his tail with annoyance. "Hey don't stop! I don't mind." Grimmjow closes his eyes and drifts to sleep after.

Unbeknownst to Grimmjow he was so comfortable laying with (Your Name) he changed to his human form, tail and ears still visible. Although instead of his head laying on her tummy he was big spooning her.

(Your Name) felt a wave of heat overcome her body as she groaned in her sleep. She's pretty sure her eyes are puffy as they felt heavy to open. "Grimmjow move a little, it's getting hot." She complains trying to turn on her side but his big body has her caged between his arms.

With annoyance she shoots out of bed to push him but instead she screams and grabs her spray bottle. "Is that you Grimmjow?!"

Spraying his face wakes Grimmjow up as he yells "dammit women I'm trying to sleep!" His ears pulled back and tail flapping aggressively.

(Your Name) laughs and she laughs so hard she can hardly breathe. "I can't believe I'm seeing you like this for the first time." She says and after realizing her big panther was finally showing his true form she smiles a bit to herself forgetting why she cried in the first place.

Grimmjow was not so happy as he was fuming with annoyance and he was hangry. He throws all her pillows at her before stomping off.

"I was wondering how you used the bathroom this whole time you know." She teases Grimmjow following him into the kitchen as he plopped his ass in a chair for the first time in years.

"Shut it women before I go back to not speaking to you ever again."

"Whatever, bet you were getting lonely not using that pissy mouth of yours." (Your Name) throws back at him getting ready to start dinner.

Grimmjow keeps his silence watching as she moves around the kitchen once more. Everything was still foreign to him especially being back in this form after so long.

"So how are you liking it here?" She strikes up a conversation although her back is to him. He can feel a shakiness to her voice like she was scared to ask him.

"It's fine." He states and Grimmjow swore he saw her shoulder slump a little.

"Ahh well it won't get any better than this."

Grimmjow knows she's right but his pride won't let him admit it. She dishes up dinner and places it on the table for the both of them. "Thought you would want to try something different for dinner." She exclaims as he stares at a triangular shape of food. "It's called pizza, sorry I was too tired to cook much tonight."

"Tch getting lazy now." Grimmjow complains as she brings the spray bottle close to his face before returning to dinner.

Grimmjow hated to admit but whatever this pizza thing was, was actually good. He ate everything with no complaints and she snickered at him.

Although she hasn't fully looked his way Grimmjow knows he is an ugly wild beast so he understood if she was a little on edge. "tch women can't even look at me."

"You can still sleep with me at night if you want. I mean... since you aren't in your panther form nothing has changed. You can still do whatever you want." (Your Name) explains again before clearing the dishes quickly. Grimmjow watches as her heart rate had fasten and her cheeks began to change color.

"Why's your face pink?" Grimmjow asks nonchalantly as he knits his brow and she throws a kitchen towel at him. "It's not pink jerk and it's called blushing! Anyways good night I'm tired now!" She shouts making her way quickly to her room.

Grimmjow was rather confused of her behavior but didn't say a word as he made sure all the doors were locked. At least he was doing what she did every night before heading to his room. He could only smirk. Maybe being in this form wasn't so bad.

It took (Your Name) a few weeks to adjust to Grimmjow and his new form. She's grown to understand how he likes things, his body language and the way he talks. It was nice having someone to communicate with again. Although she still had a hard time looking at him because well.... He was very much good looking, handsome, sexy. She could go down the list.

She did miss his paws on her or his light head nudges. Now that Grimmjow was talking he just demands what he wants now.

"Hey I don't mean to pry but the scars on your body." She asks one night as they sat in her garage, Grimmjow drinking water as he stops punching the punching bag she got him.

"Oh these? They're nothing just from the hybrid fights." He nonchalantly says before turning his attention back to the punching bag.

(Your Name) didn't pry but from what others have told her hybrids lived in cages in the most filthy conditions.

"Well let's go shopping tomorrow! I'm off and you get to spend the whole day with little ole me!" She beams at him but Grimmjow couldn't understand the concept of shopping.

"What, gonna get yourself another hybrid to keep you company now that you're bored of me? I'll scare the piece of shit away." He threatens while punching the bag keeping his focus on her.

"What are you talking about stupid? Shopping as in clothes? Food? Also I need to get you a phone." She says in disbelief of his attitude now.

"Tch, could have said so women." He says as (Your Name) remembers the sales man saying that panthers and other hybrids can get very possessive of their owners. She didn't think Grimmjow was but she never tested the theory out.

"Whatever stay cooped up in here then." She huffs going back inside the house to entertain herself with some reality tv. Grimmjow only stares at her figure walking away as he grits his teeth. She was driving him crazy, there was a warm fuzzy feeling he felt in his stomach that he did not like.

After another hour Grimmjow cleans up and heads to find her in her room on her phone. "So what's a phone?" He asks curiously watching her play with the little rectangle thing.

She pats the empty space on her bed and explains it's a device to communicate with people as well as a form of entertainment. "I need to get you one now. So I can update you or you can text me when I'm busy." She tells him.

Grimmjow hums in responds and hesitantly reaches for her body but pulls back. Her eyebrows are raised as she turns to look at him. He was contemplating on whether to touch her or not.

"We've cuddle when you were a cat what's so different now?" She asks as he only gives her a frown.

"You can't even look at me for a long time without averting your eyes." He bites back as she gaps her mouth and pouts. "That's not true."

After a moment of silence she puts her phone down and turns off the lamp. Grimmjow only stares back at her confused of her actions. (Your Name) hesitantly grabs his hand and places it on the top of her hips before closing her eyes to sleep.

Grimmjow didn't protest, a little part of him wanted to be near her. After all he sought to find her. He closes his eyes and sleeps as well.

Getting Grimmjow in the car and the drive was fine but, she could tell that he was very anxious about being in the public eye especially since he didn't have much interaction before. As (Your Name) got out of the car he followed behind trailing. She only sighed at his actions but understood that big crowds were something he didn't like.

Grimmjows eyes scanned every face and even saw some hybrids on their own. Good for them he thought bitterly. Of course he was kept as a pet, that's how the humans thought of them. He couldn't help but feel a little sour looking towards (Your Name).

"Doing okay?" Her voice reaches his ears as she settled with the same pace as him. Grimmjow only grunted while some people stared at his 'wild' features. They were dirt to his foot and he could have easily beat the shit out of them.

Making their way to the store he stood only inches away from (Your Name). "Which one do you like?"

He looks at the blue one and she only smirks before making the purchase.

"So hybrids can live a normal life too?" He asks curiously while taking a glance at a few that were walking around the stores.

"It's not uncommon but they are still treated like second class citizens."

He could only roll his eyes, the humans have never changed.

As time passed (Your Name) was walking around different stores purchasing clothes as she took a pause in her step and told Grimmjow he could pick anything out he wanted. He stopped in his steps and gave her an annoyed look.

"I don't care for these things." He explained before walking ahead leaving her to chase his long strides.

"I'm trying to help you Grimmjow!" She tells him as it irk a nerve and he twisted his body to meet hers.

"I don't give a shit, I'm a pet after all!" He yelled causing some pedestrians to stare and whisper amongst each other.

An officer from the store came out and warned (Your Name) to keep her 'pet' in check or they would be kicked out. Embarrassment came over her features as she continued to apologize to people who watched or sneered as she took Grimmjows hand and directed them out.

The drive back was awkward. Grimmjow was angry and (Your Name) was silent. She had an unreadable expression on her face. Once they got home she went straight to her room and Grimmjow only scoffed and slammed his door in an attempt to piss her off.

Since Grimmjow was a hybrid his hearing was more sensitive than humans and he could hear her shuffling around her room. Talking to someone on the phone. He suspected it was 'animal control' as he cursed and slammed her door open before she could kick him out.

"What the fuck you prick?" She screams as he snatched her phone and hung the phone call up.

"Tryna get rid of me already?" He sneered cornering her to wall as she held her hands onto his chest. There was hurt behind her eyes as she pushed him off.

"Leave me alone, it wasn't 'animal control' if you were that concerned. I'm going out tonight. I showed you how to use a phone, the kitchen, so keep yourself company or watch tv. I'm leaving." The bitterness in her voice explains as she opened her closet to throw on her dress and Grimmjow averted his eyes towards her ass.

"The fuck you going?" He asks as she threw on some heels and fixed her hair.

"Away from you, fyi I never adopted you. I just bought you from them so you wouldn't get killed. You're free to leave if you hate it here so much. Try surviving on your own then!"

She slams her front door getting into her car driving off as Grimmjow cursed and threw himself onto the couch. "She's being sensitive for no reason." He voices closing his eyes, irritation on his face. He was bored now that she was gone. Grimmjow had never seen (Your Name) so angry before as he huffed knowing he was in the wrong for snapping at her.

(Your Name) decided to go to the bar with some friends as she drank and danced to cool off some steam. "Hey how's your hybrid?" Ichigo asks as he pays for their drinks and she could only pout while taking the liquor.

"He's been an asshole, we got into a fight."

"Sorry I know our type is hard to get along with." Ichigo sheepishly says, his lion ears twitching from all the music.

"It's fine. I'm here to enjoy the night."

(Your Name) frowned a little thinking about Grimmjow, what he did when she was gone or if he's eaten dinner. She wished he would enjoy life more instead of cooping up in her house everyday. She understood coming from his violent past Grimmjow wasn't comfortable going out in public but she looked at all the other hybrids that have overcame their challenges. Grimmjow just needed a little nudge.

"Bastards probably enjoying all his alone time."

Her and Ichigo dance a little more that night after meeting up with more of their friends to bar hop.

"Don't drink to much (Your Name) you have to drive home!" Rukia warned as they walked into another bar and she could only laugh at the tiny girl before clinging onto Ichigo for assistance to the bar.

"You have to drive her home." Rukia tells Ichigo as he silently acknowledged and helped (Your Name). Tailing her moves to keep a watchful eyes of perverts and weirdos. Ichigo understood hybrids can be difficult to handle. He also had a rough patch with humans so he understood (Your Name) needed this time to enjoy herself. Her phone rang in her purse as Ichigo cursed seeing as (Your Name) was striking up a conversation with Rukia again. Ichigo answers the phone instead.

"The fuck you at? It's late." Grimmjow voice comes out as Ichigo gave a puzzled look and sighed. "This must be the hybrid she saved."

"Hey I'm (Your Name) friend, she's dancing right now but I can let her know you called." Ichigo says as he heard a loud noise emit from the phone and a few curses before the call ended. Ichigo knew he might have to fight another hybrid on the way to (Your Name) house.

Ichigo drove (Your Name) home as she tried to sober up on the drive back. "Ugh I'm sorry, I didn't mean to get this drunk. There's been a lot going on." She apologizes again as Ichigo gives her a small smile and held her hand for reassurance. "Hey it's fine, we all get those days. I don't mind helping a friend out but also be careful at home. Your hybrid Grimmjow seemed very angry on the phone."

(Your Name) giggles a little knowing that Grimmjow was positively jealous.

"How will you get home?" She asks Ichigo as he reassured her that Rukia was following them home so he had a ride back.

Grimmjow can hear her car pull up as he sees another hybrid carrying (Your Name) towards the door. He's pissed and angry another hybrid was marking their scent on her as he swung the door open and snatched (Your Name) from Ichigo.

"Hey I'm not here to fight." Ichigo threatens watching how Grimmjow was holding her possessively and keeping a keen eye on him.

Grimmjow lets out a growl as Ichigo growled back.

"Stop! Ichigo is my friend, you won't treat him like a stranger or fight each other." (Your Name) demands at Grimmjow hugging his upper body to separate the two.

"Fool come out here." Rukia voice calls out to Ichigo as he growled one last time to Grimmjow before taking a step out the door.

Rukia and (Your Name) give each other a knowing look before taking each hybrid away from each other. "Thanks you guys. I'll see you soon." She tells them before closing the door and turning to a pissed off Grimmjow.

He immediately tears her dress apart as she gasps from such strength he possessed. His growls were prominent as he tried to get Ichigo scent off her. Grimmjow couldn't understand why he was acting like she was his mate but something about another hybrid scent on her drove him insane.

"Stop!" She screamed at him as he threw the garments across the room and stormed off.

(Your Name) was hazy at this point, she picked up her dress and went straight to her room.

Grimmjow would never hurt her, she knew he had said mean things but he would never lay a hand, no matter how angry he got.

Lost in thought of Grimmjows tantrum she hurled towards the toilet, her mascara running down and hair pulled back.

Grimmjow could hear her throwing up from in the garage as he used the punching bag. He was blowing off steam as well. It wasn't until the sound of her gagging had his ears perking up. "Stupid annoying women" he cursed making his way to her room.

Grimmjow sees her figure over the toilet looking sorry for herself.

He walks behind her to hold her hair before drawing a bath for her.

"It's fine. I can take care of myself!" She explains shooing his body away but Grimmjow doesn't let her. He lifts her naked body into the tub and starts using all the soaps she had.

"You know each soap is different right?" (Your Name) states with attitude as Grimmjow tail flicks with annoyance.

"Shut up you stink." He says before washing her body and hair. (Your Name) only pouts and lets Grimmjow continue his routine of a bath.

While washing her Grimmjow could see there was still some sadness behind her eyes as he cleared his throat. "Did I scare you?" He asks.

"No, I was just startled. It's my fault anyways. I brought a potential threat to you." (Your Name) softly says while looking down at the water. She felt ashamed for bringing a competition to the house. She could see why Grimmjow was upset.

"He's not competition. You're mine and scent is a big thing with hybrids." He explains lifting her body out the water and wrapping a towel around her.

"I'm sorry." (Your Name) continues as Grimmjow couldn't even remember why they were fighting in the first place.

"Es fine, I guess I'm sorry too." He says nonchalantly but (Your Name) could only giggle at his expression of trying to be straight face while apologizing.

"Stop laughing women and change." Grimmjow says turning the other way as she followed his steps.

"But I wanna cuddle tonight please!" She begs still a little tipsy walking into his room, or what Grimmjow would say: his territory.

A dangerous line was being crossed but Grimmjow would never let her know that his rut was going to come soon.

"No."

"Yes."

"Piss off."

"You piss off pussy!" She throws back as he glares at her and throws her onto the bed.

"Don't say I didn't warn you." Grimmjow grins. Her towel threatening to peel off. "Give me a shirt." She demands as he knits his brow in confusion.

"Why?"

"So I can smell like you stupid."

Heat rushed over his groin. Grimmjow still had animal instinct and the fact that (Your Name) wanted his scent all to herself left him hard.

After putting on his shirt she waited for Grimmjow to join her in bed but he was standing by the door. "Come sleep with me." She pouts opening up his blankets as he hisses under his breath.

Grimmjow would not give into temptation. He knew his painfully hard dick would be hard all night but (Your Name) was even harder to pry off. Without much of a choice he slips under the covers as she curled her body in his.

"Let's just forget about all the fighting today. I like when we are happy." She explains half asleep.

Grimmjow stayed silent as he took her hand into his and drifted to sleep, hoping his hard dick would soften by morning.

The sheets never felt more comfortable to Grimmjow as he purred in his sleep, a hand stroking his hair unknowingly to him as he slept like a baby. A sigh escapes his lips as he nudged more into her hands that were caressing his hair and face.

"cute kitty" (Your Name) scowls before a genuine smile plasters her face. Grimmjow was leaning more into her touch, his fine lines of irritation gone.

She had awoken a few hours after the disasters of yesterday. Leaving his bedroom she heads downstairs to make a big breakfast.

Once Grimmjow feels the comforting warmth was gone he frowns in his sleep and flips to his side to find it cold. He growls out of annoyance because (Your Name) was providing so much comforts to his sleeps now.

Heading out of bed he pulls on a hoodie and stalks to (Your Name). He was silent walking into the kitchen as he puts a hand on her head as a gesture to let her know he was there.

"Oh good morning!" She beams as he looks down to see she was still wearing his shirt. He glances the other way and grunts as a response.

"Hey." Grimmjow calls out as he sheepishly reminds her that his rut was coming soon. "My rut is coming."

A blush appears on her face as she shrieks and turns back to the food that was cooking on the stove. Grimmjow just takes a seat on the counter waiting for her response.

"Um... I can't take you to the store so we can find something to satisfy you during that period."

He could only smirk as he felt generous today so he set the table up for breakfast.

"Sounds good to me." He says as curiously got the better of her.

"I don't know why that never crossed my mind... how did you deal with it in the past?" (Your Name) nervously asks filling his plate with eggs, sausages and bacon.

"My hands, or fucking other hybrids when we got the chance too or ride the pain out." He nonchalantly says eating his breakfast. Grimmjow could see that (Your Name) was genuinely curious, humans don't have heats or ruts.

"Ah I'm sorry, you could have told me before." There was silence between them as they ate but the silence was comforting. Grimmjow was comfortable enough to let (Your Name) know his most vulnerable state was coming and she was genuine not to judge how hybrid body's work.

"I won't be a bother... I've dealt with it in the past. I'll just stay in my room during that period." Grimmjow tries to sooth her seeing she was lost in thoughts about the whole conversation.

"Oh don't worry, I'll be working throughout the day anyways so... I'll order some toys for you."

Grimmjow was thankful she was helping his little problem that was going to arise but his other problem was her scent now. He was getting attached to (Your Name) and it annoyed him that a women like her could catch his heart. He would never let her know that.

After (Your Name) did her research on hybrids about their heat/rut, reading the articles made her blush. It wasn't uncommon for hybrids and humans to sleep together although society thought of it to be a sin.

"Um what toys would you like?" She bashfully shows her laptop to Grimmjow as he leans over her head to examine them.

"I don't know any of those things, my hands are good." He tells her before smirking, teasing (Your Name).

"Those rubber looking dicks are for women, bet you got one of those seeing as I've never seen a man in here before."

She slammed her laptop and grabbed the water spray so fast Grimmjow didn't have a chance to dodge. "Shut your trap pussy cat, I get off when I need too!" Embarrassment washes over her feature before she stomps off.

Grimmjow only laughs as he prayed his rutting period wouldn't make him crazy.

(Your Name) and Grimmjow went back to their normal schedule of routine. It had been a few days since their last conversation about his rut. She couldn't help but be curious if he had slept with a lot of women in the past.

The thought of him with another women irked her nerves as she frown.

"It's not like we are even dating or I'm his mate!" (Your Name) pouts as she applied her skincare onto her face before making her way into bed. Dinner tonight was fine, Grimmjow was more quiet than normal though.

(Your Name) had some ideas to leave the house for a few days during that period but knowing Grimmjow he would destroy it if she was not home.

"Hey." Grimmjow says while knocking on her door.

"When did the kitty cat have manners?" she calls out to Grimmjow as her door slams open and he looks irritated. "oh there's the Grimmjow I know."

"Tch, shut it women. I'm sleeping with you tonight."

Her face blushed as she turned the other way to grab her tv remote. They've only slept together a handful of time but it still gave her a warm fuzzy feeling whenever he was touched up next to her.

"Come join me then." she offers climbing into bed making herself comfortable to enjoy the night. Grimmjow goes quiet again as he lays down and faces her way. Tv bored him, some shows were interesting but he rather just tease her the whole night.

"Why're you staring." (Your Name) then asks as she turns on a movie, her eyes glued to the screen.

"Nothing much to stare at." Grimmjow explains as she grabbed her pillow to suffocate him but he grabbed her arms before she could react and howls out of laughter. "Why do you think everything is about you?" he proceeded to ask.

"Usually when people say that it means we aren't pleasant to look at."

Grimmjow only scoffs "I meant there's nothing in your room to look at, course I'm gonna look at you."

(Your Name) hearts start to race as she only scowls at him before scooting closer to his heat. The rest of the night was silent as he drifted sleep. (Your Name) finally calms down as she brushed a few pieces of hair out of his face before kissing him on the forehead. Grimmjow would never know.

The next morning her bed was empty as she looked around the house to find Grimmjow.

"I'm leaving to work." (Your Name) tells Grimmjow as he was punching the bags, back facing her. He didn't reply so she rolled her eyes and left.

Grimmjow that morning woke up feeling hot and sweaty, he knew his rut was here once his dick was squished between her ass while they cuddled. Not wanting to make a scene a Grimmjow thought blowing off some punches would distract his wants and needs but it didn't help as he cursed and went straight to his room.

He had laid in bed, his body flushed as he used his hands for relief. "Maybe I should have gotten them damn toys." he thinks as he grits his teeth to look at his leaking dick. Grimmjow whimpers because the feeling was not enough, living in a home had made him soft. He was losing his self restraint.

Grimmjow chases the thoughts of (Your Name) running her tongue from his shaft to his tip, eyes meeting his as she giggles and gives it a few kitten licks before hollowing her checks to suck him fully.

He thinks about eating her went cunt and ass from behind as she moans into the sheets gripping her cheeks to spread apart for him.

Grimmjow imagines her riding his dick, her eyes rolling as her tits gave him a show.

He curses as he chased his first release and growls because he was still painfully hard. Grimmjow needed to feel her wet cunt sucking him whole, needed to hear their skin slapping together and needed to bite her beautiful precious neck. Grimmjow needed to make her his.

He gets up to splash water on his face, those were horny thoughts. "I don't actually like her." Grimmjow tells himself but he cannot deny that (Your Name) has him wrapped around her little fingers. Grimmjow decides to lock his door all day before curling into bed to ride out the rut.

"I'm home!" (Your Name) yells a few hours after work as she carries in take out for dinner. "Grimmjow come eat dinner!"

The house was dark, nothing seemed out of place and there was no noise from any of the rooms. (Your Name) carries herself up the stairs to open Grimmjows door but its locked and she frowns. "Hey come eat." her voice gentle and soft.

(Your Name) didn't get any response for a few minutes before she heard rustling and whimpering. Her face redden as she remember that his rut was happening now. Without protesting she walks back downstairs to eat.

She was sadden Grimmjow was ignoring her but then she remembered he probably wasn't attracted to her and did not want her help. Her eyes downcast as she ate dinner alone, it was unusually quiet. The night was lonely without him.

She settled into bed leaving soft music playing hoping music may give him a sense of comfort.

Grimmjow hears (Your Name) when she gets home, when she calls out to him. He can hear her eat dinner alone as well as her sad sighs. He can hear the soft music coming from her room and her light snores.

(Your Name) was a nice caring women, cared to much about what other people thought. He did not want her help all the time, she was always caring his weight and slack. He could ride his rut out. At least that's what Grimmjow thought as he smelt her arousal.

"Baby really wants me bad." he grits as he made his way to her room. The door opened easily as he finds her asleep. (Your Name) arousal filled his nose as he moaned and made his way to her.

He finds one of her toys on the side of her bed as he ferally grinned, she was a naughty little thing pleasuring herself while he was on his rut.

Grimmjow dips onto the bed and licks her cheeks, licks her neck, licks her ears as (Your Name) groaned before slipping her hands into his hair.

"Grimmjow." She whispers as he hums in response to her voice as shivers went down his spine. "What are you doing?"

"Making you mine, I want you." He breathlessly confesses as his eyes dilated from the expression on her face.

"You want me?" she asks with excitement in her voice.

"If it wasn't obvious."

(Your Name) gives Grimmjow a bear huge as he groans from her body squished against his, the heat rushing down to his dick.

"Sorry.. let me help you."

Grimmjow is silent but can't help look at (Your Name) with genuine eyes, she was selflessly allowing him to destroy her. Not in the way of sleeping together but emotionally and physically. He was a hybrid and after bonding herself to him she would have to deal with him for the rest of their lives.

"No, I need to be sure you want this, you want me, you want the dirty stares, you want the second class treatment. You want my kittens. You want a world where I am even though the world won't treat us fairly."

(Your Name) gasps as she cups Grimmjows face, a smile is plastered on her face. "I want everything about you Grimmjow. I can't imagine my life alone again. Even if it means going against society."

Grimmjow was satisfied with her answer as he pressed his lips to hers. Her taste was so addicting as he groaned sucking her bottom lip cupping her breast.

"Please be gentle." she asks then as he gives her a dumbfounded look.

"No I'll let my dick rip you apart." he sarcastically replies throwing (Your Name) onto her back and she rolls her eyes. "There you are, was about to say you were breaking character for a moment."

"tch, I want to make sure you know that I'm staying her forever."

(Your Name) doesn't reply but gives him a kiss again.

Grimmjow discards their clothes as he settles between her legs lifting them slightly giving access to her dripping pussy. He presses his nose against it and sighs before giving her clits a long lick. Lapping up her juices Grimmjow grinds into the bed as she moaned grabbing his hair.

"Fuck this pussy doing me good." he says sucking on her clit lips before going back to devour her again. "is it that good?" she asks flushed from his compliment.

He hums and flips her to all fours spreading her cheeks. Her little puckering hole welcoming him as he moans before spitting on her ass. "Baby let me eat your ass." he asks and she whimpers a yes please. He grins as his tongue rimmed her ass and she gasps the feeling was foreign but felt good. Grimmjow uses one hand to massage her clit and the other to stick a finger into her puckering hole.

"Feel good baby."

"yes so good." she breathlessly says as he alternated between licking her clit and ass again.

Grimmjow slaps her ass before lifting her body up to his. "I need you now I can't wait." he pleads as she nods fisting his dick. As he entered her she squirmed because of his huge size.

"To big, hurts." she cries as grimmjow flips her onto her back giving her kitten kisses while pushing in more. "Grimmjow!" she whines as he shushes her again biting her shoulder. (Your Name) whimpers the whole time Grimmjow eases himself into her pussy.

"es okay baby, pussy sucking me good." he says as she nods with a whine. Grimmjow massages her clit as she groans in relief. His hands distracting her from his dick ripping her apart. Grimmjow bottoms out as he praises to her "doing good baby, taking me well."

Within a few minutes of (Your Name) adjusting to his size she moaning into his mouth as he pushes into her, rutting his hips into hers. He keeps a steady pace as Grimmjow watches her fucked out expression. "fuck." he groans taking one of her tits into her mouth as she gasps under him. He swirls his tongue around her nubs loving the thought she would produce milk one day.

He bites down as she cries out. "More." She demanded as Grimmjow smirked and pushed her into a mating position. His balls slapping her ass in a rhythm.

"I want to cum Grimmjow please, please." she begs as he bit into her neck giving them bruised marks.

"Kay baby let me help you."

They go into doggy style as he massages her clit and (Your Name) is squirming under his touch.

"I'm close." she whispers as Grimmjow slams into her pussy slowly but thoroughly letting his dick hit her g spot each time. "yes right there." she praises as her body starts to shake and his dick was sucked into her pussy even more.

She was a moaning mess under him as she hit her orgasm. Grimmjow kisses her back all the way to her ass before slamming into her roughly again to chase his.

He grits his teeth taking one finger into her ass as she cries into the sheets.

"Almost baby." he coos as she whimpers in response. After a few more thrust he spills into her and he bites down onto her shoulder.

Grimmjow pulls out and watched both their cum spill out of dripping cunt.

"I can go a few more rounds." He warns her as she agreed to help him more.

(Your Name) didn't go into work for a few days after, her body was sore and Grimmjow was surprising sweet to her the whole time his rut was happening.

After his rut was over he was different although still rough, easy to irritate but his snaps were just warnings and he doted onto her every chance he got.

"I wish we did this sooner." (Your Name) pouts as Grimmjow purrs into her neck while she watched the outside rain. The coziness of her home drawing them to a lazy comfort. There were candles lit as well as soft jazz music playing in the background.

"mmm." he responds giving her neck a few licks before cuddling back into her. "You're my women."

She chuckles lightly and gives Grimmjow a big hug.

"So it seems, I wouldn't want it any other way."

(Authors note: Hear me out, I want to make a hybrid Grimmjow series. WHOSE WITH ME ON THIS ONE! also I am very bad at writing smut but love to read it so I apologize it isn't the best. I'm afraid I am a nasty girl. But since he is coming back into the series I thought we deserved this little fluff/smut oneshot of him.)

[squeakadeeks]

hello, here to pester you with a question >:3!

where do you get the money to make your cosplays?? i'm in the middle of crafting a bunch of stuff for a plant convention and gyatt damn everythings so pricey

:((

along with the storage ive been getting this one a bunch too haha

to tell true, this is no fault on your part so no frets here at all !!! BUT i'm not comfortable discussing my personal finances online. because on a wide scale, anything in regards to money gets incredibly niche to a person's circumstances and will make people get upset/can leave you vulnerable to a lot of bad things. My pay scale and spending habits are not something i'm hip to sharing online since its really private and opens a lot of dangerous doors. (also my spending habits are not exactly healthy or generalizable either.) I'm not saying this to like...dodge being a secret billionaire or anything, but even if i say "i work a STEM job" I've had people get weird about even just that information.

That being said, there are ways i make cosplay more affordable.

usually in-store fabric shopping at say joanns, is just about as expensive as it gets. if you have to shop only at joanns, michaels, etc the bill racks up fast. There are some in-store fabric shops that are cheaper, especially if they are wholesalers or general fabric warehouses, but those are not easy to find outside of cities most often. Joanns does have good coupons, and i can only shop at joanns these days if i have a coupon or there's a sale on that fabric type i'm interested in!

online wholesale fabric shops are a good way to find fabrics that are at lower prices, but then it does incur extra shipping costs. because of that i try to limit the number of orders I make (more orders, more extra shipping). this looks like grouping orders between projects, or even compromising on fabric types based on the stock of one website so i dont have to split an order between two sites.

sometimes you really do have to sacrifice material type. theres been a number of projects this year that i wanted to make out of a nicer type of fabric, even Thistle for example i considered making out of a dupioni, but it was just too dang expensive. dupioni would be around $25 a yard...vs poly suede which is $6. or even a cheaper satin at $3 a yard is a common sub i use as well. I also very frequently have to throw out entire cosplay ideas just based on cost since its just not feasible no matter how many compromises i make.

reduce the burden by extending your timeline. unfortunately theres no way around it, most projects i make are $200-300, and thats....fairly low in the grand scheme of things for crafting-focused cosplayers on mid sized projects. but either way, dropping all of that at once in one place is a huge blow to the wallet. but if you break up that whole $200 cost into say...$20 chunks from one week to the next, its softer. if you cant or dont want to reduce your budget, expanding your timeline is a good solution. now granted, that does cause a problem with the whole "less orders means less shipping costs" but the weighing of those two scenarios has to be done person to person/project to project.

STOCKING UP....when there are sales or other things, building a horde can be a great move. like silverbell didnt actually show up much on my finances this month because all the fabric i used on his suit was storage fabric. so it was ""free"" to me this month, because i already bought it.....3 years ago...and that money isnt real anymore haha.

this is really regional and depends on where you are, but thrift stores can have material sections that have good fabrics as well as sheets/blankets/base garments etc. ive been weirdly lucky with finding great fabrics at thrift stores...like literal joanns fabric for half the cost there, but thats super SUPER hit or miss and not something i rely on, but i do check that section whenever i'm there

[spandexual]

Hello! I’m sorry that today I come without any fun toku questions. I must say I enjoy reading your Boomger stuff on forsaken bird app! Love me a pathetic Blue also.

I wanted to ask whether you have a perfume recommendation for a beginner. I can’t tell you much about my skin, my usual preference at least so far is opposite of what your skin likes. I like citrus and jasmine and I know it isn’t suitable for your skin 😅 Current perfume I have might smell like citrus dish soap (I don’t mind it much) or simply citrus with its bitterness and freshness depending on a day. Yet my head might hurt from salt in perfume for example. Overall I might enjoy to smell a lot of stuff, but can’t wear anything heavy. Anyway, I thought you still might suggest something/know something good, you’re great at perfume stuff 🥰 Sorry if it is something hard, I understand if you can’t suggest me anything. ☺️

From your perfume recs I liked JHAG’s Not A Perfume because it is light and I think it suits me! At least it doesn’t smell like shit, lol (had this experience with Kenzo’s L'eau Pour Femme ¯\_(ツ)_/¯)

I kind of feel bad for asking now, sorry I am that curious when my taste is so opposite. In exchange now, I’ll say about toku anyway. I think my fav watch thread of yours is Zenkaiger. It’s just such fun show and seeing you watch it was extremely fun also, you sold me on watching it myself! Also the throuple. I know one day you might write a fic for them so I hope a great idea will fall into your head eventually! I don’t have any in me though 😅

don't apologise, I appreciate that I'm being thought of as someone with good advice lol! Not A Perfume is a fave of mine too, it's a shame so many people have the gene that means they completely can't smell it. I think it's a really sexy scent!

As for jasmine, I actually really love it! I don't wear it a huge amount bc most of the time it's not paired with the heavier woodsier notes I like and like... I have a giant jasmine plant out the front of my house, so I don't miss the scent too much when I'm not wearing it. That said, I like Lush's Vanillary which as you might guess is a pretty heavy vanilla scent but it has a great jasmine note in it as well as tonka (and lasts FOREVER even on my perfume-killer skin, really, I could still smell it after 5 drinks and 4 hours of sweaty dancing at Emo Nite lmao so be careful with your sprays...), and J'Adore Dior is a girly classic for a reason. There was also a relatively recent Gucci perfume that I liked a lot but I don't remember which one it was and there are multiple that have jasmine in their ugly floral bottle range so you'll just have to try them all I guess lol sorry. These should all be pretty easy to find and try tho!

And I'm glad you're enjoying my Boonboomger thread (it's no surprise to say I love pathetic blues too right lol) and enjoyed my Zenkaiger one! Zenkaiger is seriously insanely good, Donbros gets so much attention and praise for being The Best Sentai Ever I think because it was just so many people's first sentai (and/or first Inoue toku, whereas I know him VERY well lol) and it was fairly unusual in structure while still being entertaining but Zenkaiger I think really deserves that title if you were going to choose anything from Reiwa because it is so sentai. I liked Donbrothers and I LOVED Kingohger but both of them clearly were going "HEH we're not like OTHER sentais!!!!" and Inoue for his part seemed to actively hate a lot of what makes sentai sentai lol. Again I liked Donbrothers a lot but lbr it's basically just one of his Kamen Rider shows but brighter coloured.

As for zenkai ot3... I would like to write something for them some day, but it is difficult to think of something when the show is just so cute. I'm not someone who's good at writing fluff, really, and they demand it. My speciality is political underhandedness, moral ambiguity and veiled but burning hot eroticism. I think John Toei made Kaguragi for me specifically

[imagineakatsuki]

Hello there! I hope I did it right :) Could you do an image about an akatsuki and a fem s/o and they have to care about a robot baby as a school project? Feel free to choose an akatsuki :) (School AU, if you don‘t do it, it is okay) I hope you could understand me, I am not very good in englisch 😅 Have a good day!

Hey anon! I chose Sasori because I’m a little obsessed with him right now, but just send in another ask if you want a specific character! Who knows, I may or may not make this a series anyway~

Note: for some reason, I missed the s/o part of this ask, so this scenario reads more as a general female reader. Sorry about that!

Admin S

“Sasori and [Name].”

The redhead wasn’t thrilled about the project when the teacher had first announced it, opting to finish a joint of one of his puppet creations instead of paying attention. With a heavy sigh, he turned to his project partner with his usual dead-eyed stare.

“You’re [name], right?”

“Yes, I’m [name]. You must be Sasori?”

“That’s right,” Sasori took the paper with the instructions and skimmed it quickly. It was like one of his puppet creations - except he didn’t make it, and it required actual physical attention beyond just fixing its appearance.

“Frankly, I think this is a ridiculous project and a waste of time,” the boy said, “How unfortunate that it counts for so much of our final grade.”

“Y-yeah,” [Name] replied appeasingly. She had sensed the irritated aura of her partner and didn’t want to push her luck. If the rumors were true, the redhead had very little patience for idiocy. He was a genius, however, so maybe [name] could use that to their advantage. “It might be stupid, but I kinda need to do well on it to get a good grade, so your cooperation would be great.”

“Don’t worry, I’ll pull my weight. It seems fairly simple and straightforward; getting a good grade will be easy.”

[Name] raised an eyebrow. “Oh? You have some childcare experience then?”

The silence was telling.

“No.” Sasori scrunched his nose. “But I take good care of things that I own, and they somewhat resemble this… thing.”

[Name] still wasn’t very confident with that answer, but, hey, it couldn’t be that bad, can it? It’s not like she had a choice anyway. She just hoped that Sasori wouldn’t be this standoffish throughout the entire project or this project would be harder than it had to be.

“So how do you want to do this? I take it one day and then we alternate?” [Name] asked.

Sasori hummed. “That sounds acceptable. It seems that we have similar schedules, though, so it wouldn’t really matter until after school.”

At that, [Name] had to admit she was surprised. Sasori had noticed her?

“You’re in nearly all of my classes.” Whoops. Apparently she had said that out loud. “I may not speak much, but I am still capable of observing.”

“S-sorry. I just wasn’t expecting you to actually recognize me, much less remember me.”

“Then how do you know me?”

“Well, your bright red hair is pretty noticeable… and you’re really smart when you feel like talking,” [Name] shrugged. “The way you eviscerated that teacher in biology class 2 weeks ago was awesome!”

Sasori smirked but didn’t reply. 

Soon after, the bell rang and everyone flew off their seats. Thankfully, the redhead took the decision away from [name] and grabbed the robot baby as he stood up. 

“Uh… I don’t think you hold a baby that way,” the girl giggled as she followed Sasori to their next class. He held the baby by one of its hands, the rest of the body awkwardly dangling at his side. 

“It doesn’t matter how you hold it. The thing can only track how well you attend to its artificial needs,” the boy retorted. He walked to his usual seat in the back of the class which, fortunately, had the seat next to it open. 

The two made it through half the class before the baby decided to unleash its fury on them. They had been hopeful it wouldn’t interrupt them at all, but alas, they had to suffer just as some people in the class already had. 

The entire rest of the morning was plagued with screaming, crying babies. 

<< Later >>

“What a nightmare,” Sasori rubbed his temples as he and [name] made their way out of the school doors. 

Feeling pity for the teen who was likely used to silence, [name] offered to take the robot baby for the night. The boy’s expression barely changed, but after spending the whole day actually interacting with him, [name] could tell there was a glimmer of gratefulness in his eyes when he looked at her.

“That would be great. I can take it tomorrow, but I’ve had enough of babies crying for today.” Without further ado, the redhead handed her the baby and walked away, “I’ll see you tomorrow.”

Later that night, [name] would come to regret that altruistic decision. Just as she was getting in bed, the baby started bawling, forcing her to get up and grudgingly take care of it. 

However, no matter what she did, it just wouldn’t stop crying. [Name] was getting to the end of her rope, close to a meltdown herself, which would put her no better than the baby she was supposed to take care of. Finally, after debating the pros and cons of doing so, she decided to call Sasori and see if he could help fix the problem. If nothing else, he could be moral support.

“[Name]?”

“Sasori! I’m so sorry if I woke you up or anything-“

“You didn’t.”

“But this damn baby just won’t stop crying! I swear I’ve tried everything! I was supposed to be in bed an hour and a half ago… I’m losing my mind!”

“Deep breaths, [name],” the redhead listened for an audible - if shaky - breath before continuing, “Now, I need you to tell me what you’ve done so far. We’ll figure this out by process of elimination.”

“I’ve fed it, I’ve changed it, I’ve burped it, I’ve rocked it - I don’t what else I’m supposed to do.”

The two were on the phone for half an hour before they gave up. “Since nothing has worked so far, I’m going to believe it’s malfunctioning. And it doesn’t surprise me that these companies who mass produce these things are making errors,” Sasori ranted. “Instead of continuing to waste our time, I say we just disable it and tell the teacher tomorrow.”

“Ok, that sounds good. How do I do that though?”

“I’ll walk you through it. Are you ready?”

“Yeah, I’m ready to get this over with. What do you want me to do first?”

Sasori smoothly dictated the steps to disable the doll. Knowing his impatience, [name] did her best to keep her (stupid) questions to a minimum. It didn’t take very long after that before the doll finally stopped crying. As someone who had been hearing it for the past 2 hours, it made [name] feel like crying herself. 

“Thank you, Sasori! You’re a miracle worker! Sorry I kept you awake.”

“It’s no problem. You should go to bed.”

“You don’t have to tell me twice! As soon as I put this phone down, it’s straight to bed for me. Thanks again! And good night!”

“Good night.”

Suffice to say, the teacher heard an earful the next day about the superiority of independent creators over large corporations when it comes to making good products.

[mayalaen]

CW Death & Real Life Shit

Death doesn't usually bother me all that much. I believe that people just stop existing, and while it's hard for those left behind, the person who died is no longer suffering and nothing else bad will happen to them now.

The schiz probably helps with it too - my outlook on life and reality in general.

But sometimes things hit me weird, and this weekend I got hit.

I had a few very close friends growing up (I wasn't a super social person + I'm weird 😂), and I've kept in touch with several of them. A few of those were friends + fuckbuddies.

Cecil was one of them.

We stopped playing when he got married. Played after his divorce. Stopped playing again when he got married again. I kept in touch off and on over the years though.

Last weekend he died of complications related to Covid. His wife said he wasn't feeling THAT bad, and once he stopped testing positive, he went back to work. But then his heart and lungs just gave out.

The doctor listed the cause of death as exhaustion, but he was a fairly healthy guy who didn't let life's stresses get to him and wasn't overworked, so his wife and I are convinced that Covid beat the shit out of him and his body gave out.

His wife wants him listed as a Covid death and is pissed the doc wouldn't do that. We've complained to each other before about how dismissive everybody is about Covid.

Anyway, Cecil was there for me during a really REALLY shitty time in my life when I wasn't trusting anybody (not that it's easy for me to trust anyway) and my schiz was at its worst.

He's one of only two people I let dom me for several years because I couldn't let go with anybody else and wouldn't allow anybody else to get me into bondage I couldn't get myself out of. I've always mostly dommed because of this.

It's always the good people who die early and the total pieces of shit who live a long life.

Cecil wasn't perfect, but he left A LOT of family and friends behind who adored him.

He let me complain about my shitty family in my life, and he always joked about how he KNEW they were going to live long lives because they're so shitty. I would tell him he was going to die young because he was awesome. He had a dark sense of humor and thought that was hilarious.

It hit me that he left behind so many people who are really going to miss him.

And in a selfish way it hit me that the only two people I trusted to dom me when I was at my worst are both gone now. Cecil recently and Amanda a few years back.

My family pulled more stupid shit over this weekend that had me scrambling to fix things, so during the day I was distracted enough, but at night when nobody is bugging me and it's dark and quiet, it's getting to me.

One of those "feeling lonely when you're surrounded by people" types of thing when I'm usually not a lonely person at all, but it's probably just the concept that's making me feel that way. The reality is nothing's really changed.

[1d-trashcan]

hello!!

i was just going through your blog and you have mentioned a anxiety disorder a few times, i do not really know anything about it so if you want to please educate me on this concept, if you dont wanna its all good. just know i am here if u wanna talk any time :)))))))))

HI!! I absolutely wanna educate you, thanks for asking :) This is suuuper long though, I'm so sorry :´(

There's a few anxiety disorders out there but the most common ones are social anxiety disorder or panic disorder, and then there's GAD which is short for Generalized Anxiety Disorder, and I have GAD.

Stress and anxiety is an evolutional response to danger more commonly known as fight or flight, which is the sympathetic nervous system being activated. GAD is the body being stuck in fight or flight mode, whereas social anxiety, for instance, generally means that the sympathetic nervous system kicks in in social environments (like a phone call or meeting a person).

GAD, usually presents as excessive worry about anything and everything. My grandmother will cough and my brain will think "she has lung cancer and she's dying". When I didn't know I was ill I was basically living in a nightmare. I've had a lot of therapy so nowadays I can identify it as an anxiety thought and ignore it. Some days I can't shake them, and those days are just bad anxiety days. And I can either power through it or I can take anxiety medication, but I can't work on those because they make me really drowsy.

You can develop GAD at any age, really. All it takes is being under extreme stress for a period of time, I think the criteria is like 6 months or something. There are differential diagnoses like chronic fatigue syndrome, ADHD/ADD, bipolar disorder and clinical depression that have to be excluded that early on, though. It's fairly easy to treat if caught early. It's hell, but they'll most likely have you on antidepressants and or something that helps you sleep and give you therapy. Therapy will help you deal with your triggers through cognitive behavioural therapy, exposure therapy (where you're literally exposed to your trigger/fear in a controlled environment) and that will in theory treat the disorder. You're never gonna remove anxiety because it's a survival instinct, but you're basically telling your brain that it's overreacting, and if you get help early you can actually be cured.

I have GAD because I was bullied between ages 10-16, and there's also a probability that my parents' divorce started the whole thing. The problem was that I didn't get proper help until I was 19 and I didn't even meet with a psychiatrist until I was 25 (I'm 29 now). I'm never gonna be cured, we're basically just looking for ways to help me live WITH my anxiety. I just have too many triggers and my body is too used to being in this state that there's currently no way of fixing it.

GAD sometimes comes with executive dysfunction which is where you just physically can't do things. It's a very common ADHD symtom as well. You know you need to do it but you can't, and it essentially becomes a handicap. My most common triggers for executive dysfunction is school work of any kind, opening my mail or important phone calls. In Sweden this is actually recognized as a handicap, which means that I can get help faster. But I have to make the call, which I can't do because of my anxiety so idk how foolproof that safeguard is. I'm on sick leave right now because of extreme stress (it could be chronic fatigue syndrom, but it's too early to tell rn) and now my executive dysfunction is everywhere, so like showering, cleaning my flat or making food is extremely tough and usually doesn't happen, so I have to take shortcuts (like eating at my parents' house, not washing my entire body and only cleaning small parts of my flat a a time).

Apart from being afraid anxiety triggers a lot of physical responses in your body because it is designed to keep us alive. If you have social anxiety you might have issues with your stomach (like stress pooping or nausea) when you have to engage with others or even, like, ride a train. GAD patiens almost always have chronic IBS (irritable bowel syndrome) and muscle pains because our bodies are constantly preparing for flight. I have really bad chronic muscle pain in my neck and upper back which leads to tension headaches. So on any given day, I'd rate my pain at a 5, and that's just. A thing I have to live with.

Physical activity generally alleviates the pain and the endorphins from workout are really beneficial but you can't exercise GAD away. It's just something that helps.

I'm on a high dose of antidepressants, antihistamines to make me sleep and quetiapine/seroquel, which is a mood stabiliser that basically reduces my executive dysfunction, and my medication is always gonna change depending on what my life looks like. Realistically I'm always gonna be on some form of antidepressant. I'm on SNRI's, which control the serotonin and noradrenaline in my brain.

Naturally, my serotonin is really low and my noradrenaline is really high, but in a healthy person the serotonin is high and the noradrenaline is low. The body typically restores the serotonin/noradrenaline levels during sleep, but my brain does the exact opposite so I just have extreme anxiety during the night, which is why I'm on medication to sleep bc otherwise I a) don't sleep and b) have terrible nightmares. I still have those nightmares, but the antihistamine I'm on is a muscle relaxant as well as an anxiety medication so it helps calm me down so I don't really remember my nightmares and it reduces my muscle pain by quite a bit. I still have bad nights that lead to bad days when I'm in a lot of pain. I sleep in a fetal position and tense up at night and I have a weighted blanket to help me relax so during those bad days I have trouble walking becausec my hip muscles are locked.

I think i basically covered everything. There's a lot more to it if you have any questions. I'm super open about this, and have been since I started therapy when I was 19 because I literally did not know I was sick until I was 17 and it took another two years to understand just how bad it was so I like to be as vocal as possible so people might find out and get help.

I'm SO SORRY for this long ass post though.

[archaictunic]

𝐒𝐄𝐍𝐒𝐄 𝐀𝐍𝐃 𝐎𝐓𝐇𝐄𝐑 𝐒𝐏𝐄𝐂𝐈𝐅𝐈𝐂 𝐇𝐄𝐀𝐃𝐂𝐀𝐍𝐎𝐍𝐒

WHAT DOES YOUR MUSE SMELL LIKE ? — while not the most pleasant, he primarily smells of salt & earth after a fire. he's never cared much for taking care to understand his own scent, but he does tend to wash up in rivers & streams at least before entering towns. i'm sorry but he runs around the kingdom nonstop all day. he's sorta stinky. i do think he is... somehow stinky in a good way?? like he doesn't have unbearable body odor. he just smells like wildlife.

WHAT DO YOUR MUSE’S HANDS FEEL LIKE ? — calloused. his skin is still soft on the backs, but its undeniable that he has working hands when you feel his palms. at least, one of them is. the other is smooth, almost unsettlingly so? but it is also covered in extra bits & pieces that add texture.

WHAT DOES YOUR MUSE USUALLY EAT IN A DAY ? — as much as he can --- in all seriousness, link tends to eat things that he cooks, because he enjoys doing so! he tries to have a good breakfast & dinner at least, but, with all the running around he does, he often stops to snack on some fruits & veggies ( & maybe a raw bird leg or two ) to keep himself going.

DOES YOUR MUSE HAVE A GOOD SINGING VOICE ? — if he sung, perhaps? he definitely knows how to keep a rhythm, & he hums to himself fairly often, so i think that if he spoke, & had a little practice, he could sing well. this isn't happening though.

DOES YOUR MUSE HAVE ANY BAD HABITS OR NERVOUS TICKS ? — he picks at the skin around his fingernails! like, pretty often? or now he stims by tracing the various zonai bumps along his new arm when he's nervous. its easy to do when he's talking to someone because it doesn't look that strange for a guy to cross his arms, even if his thumb is repeatedly swiping over the lifted areas near his elbow. he also tends to stress-eat, but its fine. he's fine.

WHAT DOES YOUR MUSE USUALLY LOOK LIKE / WEAR ? — outside of, obviously, the archaic set, & the champions leathers ( + hylian hood / hylian trousers ) - link most commonly finds himself swapping between the dragon wears! his favorite is, unsurprisingly, the charged set, though he almost wears the frostbite top more than that. he is also extremely partial to getting his hair done by the rito. something about it just makes him feel warm & fuzzy inside ♥ all in all, he really likes clothing that doesn't cover too much unless it has to - he doesn't like to feel restricted when he's fighting. as much as he adores the gorons, having to don the flameproof stuff to visit them is always a damper on his mood ( at least, until he sees yunobo, & the silly guy makes him perk right back up )

IS YOUR MUSE AFFECTIONATE  ? HOW SO ? — yes! he's very touch oriented, & enjoys being able to be intimate in some ways with people. the closer he is to you, the more touchy he is! link tends to hold himself back ( arms crossed, or hands on hips ) when interacting with people for a while, until he feels comfortable enough with them ( & them with him ) to actually initiate contact. he keeps it minimal when around others - simple things like touching someone's wrist to catch their attention. in private, he is much more openly loving, enjoying spending time draped around or sprawled on those he cares for. especially if they're telling him stuff. good god please let him rest on you while you infodump, its when he's at his happiest. i suppose also his LOVE for listening to people talk is another way he shows his affection. he's very relaxed, but eagerly tuned into things like that.

WHAT POSITION DOES YOUR MUSE SLEEP IN ? — depends on where he's sleeping! if he's camping somewhere, he sleeps much more curled up. smaller. harder to notice as a target or threat. if he's in a bed, & safe? he's sprawled out completely. i do not yet know how he would interact if he was sleeping beside someone, but its safe to predict he would be... protective? octopus hold... gripping... safe...

COULD YOU HEAR YOUR MUSE IN THE HALLWAY FROM ANOTHER ROOM ? — not unless he broke something lmao. in all honesty, link is VERY QUIET when he does most things. he hums when he cooks, but that's soft & to himself, & he shouts when fighting, but thats normally alone in isolated areas. he is otherwise. a very quiet person. he has learned how to step lightly & avoid being seen, when needed, & often finds himself doing it out of habit in casual settings as well.

tagged by: @vancreux ( ty !! ♥ ) tagging: other links!! tell me your headcanons :gun: also. i accidentally typed headganons so i guess. hey ganon roleplayers. i'm also getting you. & zeldas for good coverage. basically. everyone. do it.

[resmarted]

alright fine, is this what you want? here it is, the weirdly sincere version of me that comes to casually haunt you late into the night, she's right here. did you want me to tell you how i'm scared this is just another trick or too jaded to believe in the niceties of others, that i am beside myself over how pretty you are and that something that once seemed fairly easy to ignore has made its way through the floorboards pounding at my conscience with such ruthless fury? i don't know exactly when this happened, i think it started in very small flickers that i could easily smolder without much thought. i think surely you must interact with everyone this way, that you're just very nice and everyone sees these same shining eyes and has to protect their own hearts accordingly, that perhaps it has been like this since you were a kid and that your mother probably has stories for days about what that was like for all the sweet stupid girls and boys that got overlooked and left behind. i try to make sense of it, water it all down with pure logic, like surely you must feel bad for me or want to put me at ease in some sense of duty as any nice caring person would. surely you knowing me by my government name has hindered your ability to really see me and i can rest easy knowing it's just an extension of grace and generosity with good manners mixed in. i woke up randomly from a dream a few weeks ago where we were talking and could only manage to think huh, that was weird. i didn't want to keep thinking about it. i can't keep doing this to myself, the whole reading too much into things that are not there and overinvesting energy better spent elsewhere. this always happens when i am already stuck on someone else that doesn't give me the time of day, when i am wrapped safely in the cocoon of a delusion so refined that i couldn't possibly make room for anything new. i can never just be normal about things. i need obsessions to keep me going and it usually takes a new one to snap me out of the old, like some strange autistic train hopping from one infatuation to the next, lest i feel dead inside with nothing or no one to aimlessly yearn for and pine over. i can obsess over work and find things to do and people to bide my time with, but i can't unsee you. not lately, anyway. you are invading my thoughts and filling the space in my brain that is usually reserved for dead air and practical affairs. i keep thinking it's still early enough to get a grip, that i can simply meet someone new or find something shiny in the nick of time, that life isn't so bland to the point where i need a constant source of disassociation to mend the wounds of reality - not yet anyway.

jealousy is a disease and everyone around you is dying. you don't even see it. it's a pattern i see in all my favorite people, their humble nature always blocking their sight from all the ways in which people are out to get them, the subtle nonverbal cues and the small minded mentality unbearable to witness by those that actually do care for them. i can't help but suspect people have sabotaged you in similar ways all your life, how envy has wreaked havoc on you in ways you still haven't quite grasped as you're never competing with those determined to beat you at any cost. it's too presumptuous to think someone could be so calculated and vile, and that it only sounds crazy because it is and they are. but what do i know? i've been kept hostage in this cave my whole life while reverend henry kane siphons and harvests my light for personal gain. i've only ever known betrayal and alienation, it's the pure love that is difficult to navigate. it's the unabashed kindness and the rorshach of angelic whimsy all around me all the time, how did that happen? i am trapped in a prism, warm gooey blackberry dreams melting over me and vague memories of summers spent in westerly reading novels that took place in the same towns, wondering how strange it felt to be surrounded by such seemingly normal and decent people. i've lost so many versions of myself over time, so many variations and talents that were suppressed for survival, jumping from timeline to timeline until i can't seem to figure out my age anymore.

people scare me for various reasons, mainly the ones who come too close and want to stake claim, to feed off my energy and hoard it for themselves. i can't deal with anyone else trying to own me, i am still trying to wash the slime off from prior experiences. i am safe in solitude but i can come out to rage and party in these wildly extreme ways before disappearing for lengths of time, and i forget all the time that i'm not a kid anymore. which is weird because i am constantly insisting i have everything handled and i don't need any help! i'm fine i'm fine no really i'm okay it's fine!! it's literally never fine and hasn't been for so long but if i say it out loud then it becomes real and i can laugh off a thousand problems until it eventually becomes funny; a fake it til you make it kind of thing. it is very likely true that i am the evil narcissist monster people love to paint me as, because how dare i like myself, right? how dare i carve a place in this world and defy all odds when it would be easier for everyone if i just crawled back into the hole and stayed put, fall in line and act oh so grateful for anyone to ever possibly give me the time of day, oh my! i didn't survive this life to stay silent and if anything the ones that have tried to keep me in this space for so long had better find a new god to pray to if they know what's good for them. i am not here to bore you with the gory details of a life spent growing up in hospital beds or the disdain with which grown adults would look at me and still do, how people must think it was easy for me to get this far or underestimate all the burning buildings i crawled through on my way here. i hold no resentment about it, nor the desire to relive any of it. i just wanted to tell you i forget i lived through any of it when i look at you and something softens inside of me in a way that is both terrifying and thrilling. i can barely remember the hatred in their voices or the violence or the mockery or the way they thought i never caught on to any of it, how gallantly they cackled like the most pathetic coven of washed up pseudosorcerers as they feigned so poorly a threadbare kinship. all of it washes away when i look at you and for a moment i actually believe in something other than the corruption of tethered souls and the enigmatic greed that only the most clueless pawns in spiritual warfare could succumb to. i look away before i get too lost because i don't really think i can believe it, your charm far too sugary sweet for any of it to be real or reliable, but god do i wish to be fooled.

i hate that i felt my heart drop to my feet or that i even cared enough to let it be more than what it was. i guess if i could go back i wouldn't change anything, and i probably wouldn't go back at all, even if only to look at your face up close once more. i can't handle the obsession, it's not good for my fragile little psyche. i managed to be so good at not caring and then you had to go and fuck it all up and look at me like that. i tell myself you do this shit to all your hoes and that there are likely a dreadful amount, that i am being the exact version of silly according to some sick plan and falling into the trap just as designed. but then you act like a shy idiot and i am into it, i want more even though i hate this stupid game, i hate these little techniques used to reel me in like a beta fish and i want to knock you off a very high horse for daring to get me lured in this far. and i want to stare at you for a while and listen to you talk in that uncontrollable way where you do the thing starting on one topic only to wind up in fifteen other places, and i'm there along for the ride. i am following to every single rest stop, taking every little note, and watching every slightest glimmer in your eyes as you light up like a little kid in emphatic fervor. i can't tell if i want off this ride or if i want to just crash and burn and get it over with already. can't stand not knowing how long this is supposed to last but when i review the omens they seemingly all lead back to you. i was so sure it was someone else back when i wanted so badly for it to be them, and now i can't tell if i'm making it out to be you for the same reason, but the descriptors are eerily accurate and things have already happened as predicted which could not only suggest that this isn't an intricately built snare but perhaps even a safe haven where i am to finally rest my head and sleep soundly without fear for the first time ever. they say there are false twins that will mirror back the things you want them to be, that can mimic the true soul mate and deceive you into falling for the wrong one. i can't help but notice everyone that came before was just a bad imitation of you, terrible actors in a low budget cable movie in hindsight. i don't know if i can handle another fully formed entity posing as all the things i want, i'd rather turn you off completely before anything can even get started. but then what if i throw away the only person that could ever feel like home? all because i'm a superstitious dummy afraid of getting hurt. i am hurt all the time, i suppose there's not much more to be afraid of at this point. but i do know if you were to look away now it might kill me, and even worse, i might enjoy the decay.

[louwhose]

Blind Spots | Flowers

AO3 | Previous | Next Well, I may not have posted a chapter yesterday, but I DO have this one today! I should theoretically be able to finish the rest of the story on time, but... we shall see.

flowers | noun

flow·​ers | \ ˈflau̇(-ə)rs \

1d : a cut stem of a plant with its flower

-

Thorn Princess.

Derived from Yor’s surname, or rather her maiden name, of Briar. The spines that accompany a flower. The thorns that protect a wild rose.

Of course, Yor hadn’t been clever enough to come up with it herself. No, that credit was due to the Shopkeeper.

Yes, the Shopkeeper, the Gardener of Garden. Her coworkers weren’t quite as bad as Yor, but they were all hitmen, not exactly valued for their brains. The Shopkeeper was always the mind behind each operation.

So Yor chose to tell him about her discovery.

Of course, she spent quite a few days debating about whether or not she should. After all, it was so easy to ignore, and pretend that she had imagined the whole thing. Was it really so bad if Loid was a spy for Westalis? Even the fact that they got along so well despite their opposing nationalities and conflicting interests gave her hope for peace beyond this cold war their countries were locked in.

But… their goals were just too different. Yor had married him to avoid discovery by the secret police, but it could hardly be good if the west knew she was an assassin either. And Loid was sharp. Sooner or later, he was bound to notice that something was off, if he hadn't already.

So Yor, after nearly a week of knowing Loid was a spy, she chose to call the Shopkeeper while her husband was away at work, whatever it was that he really did.

"Thorn Princess?" the kindly voice of the old man answered after a few rings. "You don't usually contact me. What is it?"

"Umm…" Yor hesitated. Not because the Shopkeeper was intimidating, at least not to her, but because this was something big, and important, and suddenly she didn't feel quite as certain that Loid was, in fact, a spy. But she had come this far. She might as well voice her suspicions, even if that was all they were.

"I think my husband might be a spy for Westalis!" she blurted.

All that came through the earpiece to the phone was the faint crackling and static that accompanied every call. Then finally, she heard a long breath being let out under the static. "What makes you think that?"

Yor explained how she had found the bug in Loid's room, and how she could think of no other possible explanation, and how there might be a scheme with Eden and Anya somehow involved.

The Shopkeeper sighed. "I can see why you thought that. It still might be for some other reason, but you're right, we can't discard the possibility that he might be a spy."

There was a suspenseful pause before he continued. "Do you think he might be Twilight?"

Yor froze. Twilight, the most infamous of all the spies, man of a thousand faces, able to infiltrate anywhere, do anything? While all of that did seem to be fairly in line with the kind of capability that Loid always showed, she didn't think that alone necessarily pointed to the two being one and the same. "Why?"

"We had so little reason to suspect him before. Your husband seems to have done an extremely good job of keeping his work removed from his home life, if he is indeed a spy."

Yor dragged a hand over her arm, as though there had been a chill in the air. “So he might be the best.”

“Yes.” There was a pause. “We’ll try to get some of our own people that are skilled in information gathering to try to confirm that Loid Forger is, in fact, a spy. It will be difficult, since a spy will take precautions to avoid detection. But until then, just act normal. We’ll let you know if we need you to do something.”

And just like that, the Shopkeeper hung up.

Yor slowly drew her hand away from her ear and let it clack back onto the receiver. Wondering what they might need her to do at all. She wasn’t good for much besides killing. Her hand started trembling before her thought process caught up with the emotion.

They might want her to kill Loid.

Of course. She was an assassin. What else was she good for? But that didn’t make it hurt any less, even as a possibility. Yor sunk to the floor, clutching her arms around her knees and crying into them.

Could she even do it? Kill Loid, or rather, an enemy spy? She wondered as she sobbed.

No, she realized with alarming clarity. No, she couldn’t. Because, no matter how much their professions opposed the other’s, he was Loid. Her husband, the one that she… loved?

Yes. Loved.

She realized it now.

Yor loved Loid. Had for… a while now. Might have first fallen for him when he stood up for her at that first date where he pretended to be her husband. And everything since had only built it up.

This little family was real, to her, anyway. And no matter what she was told to do, she couldn’t destroy it. She took this job to create peace for others, and… well, killing Loid was not the answer to that. If the Shopkeeper told her to do it anyway…

Yor clenched her fist.

She stood up and wiped her tears off of her cheeks, feeling the heat radiating from them after getting so worked up. She went into the bathroom and washed off her face, which both helped her to cool down and refreshed her.

The door opened and slammed shut, and Yor came out to see Anya bursting in, just back from school. She smiled.

“Mama! Mama!” Anya squealed, literally bouncing up and down with joy. “You’ll never guess what Sy-on boy said to me to—”

Anya’s ramble quickly came to a halt as she somehow tripped over her own feet and face planted on the floor.

Yor hurried over to help the girl back onto her feet.

“Are you alright?” Anya nodded, and besides her nose being a little red and her eyes a little wide, she didn’t look any worse for the wear. “What were you saying about Damian?”

“Mama.” Anya stared at Yor with an oddly determined expression on her face that managed to make her nervous. “Are you a good or a bad person?”

Yor’s jaw just dropped in shock. What was this now? Sure, she had been considering the fact that she might have to kill Loid, and hadn’t quite recovered from that train of thought once Anya came home, but what would make the girl question it?

Yor raised her hands defensively and waved furiously. “Good! I’m a good person!”

Anya nodded solemnly. “That’s good. I see, I see.”

Yor stood there, looking at her daughter and wondering if she should ask about the story again. Or about her day? Or maybe just offer to let her play for a while as she prepared a snack for her. Any of these were fine, really, but she was still reeling from that question out of the blue. It was hard to figure out what to do when you found out your daughter seemed to think you might be a bad person for some reason.

Of course, Anya had no consideration for this, and proceeded to ask a question that somehow managed to take Yor even more off-guard. “Do you like Papa?”

“O-of course!” she answered instantly, face starting to burn up to a bright red once again. She had barely managed to realize that she was, in fact, in love with Loid, and now to talk about it, with her daughter of all people. If she hadn’t just realized that she loved him romantically, it would have been no problem to admit it, since she had been aware of loving him in a broader sense for a while now and had no shame in admitting that. “I mean, of course I love him, just like I love you. Well, maybe not just like the way I love you, but…”

Yor trailed off, unsure of what she was trying to say. She must resemble a fire engine now. She buried her head in her hands.

And of course, that of all times was when Loid came home. With a bouquet of red roses clenched almost uncertainly in hand. Not nearly as large as the one Yuri brought that first time he came over, but that was truly ridiculous and this one was still large by any normal scale.

Of course, Yor only knew any of this by peeking out between her fingers, taking in his slightly perplexed expression as he tried to figure out what was happening here, with his wife beet-red and face in hands in front of his daughter.

“Papa!” Anya exclaimed, running over to him and hugging onto one leg. “Mama likes you!”

One corner of his mouth quirked up in something between understanding and amusement. “Well, I would hope so.”

She rested her chin on his leg, looking up at him pointedly. “No, Papa. Mama actually said that she loves you.”

“Oh?” Loid asked, raising an eyebrow before turning his gaze from his daughter to meet Yor’s eyes.

She immediately uncovered them from behind her hands as she explained. “I was just saying how I love both of you, of course. You’re both my only family, besides Yuri, after all. And…” No. She was not confessing yet. Not here, not like this. Not so totally unprepared to do so. She changed the subject. “What are the roses for?”

Loid looked back down at them. “Ah, I saw them on my way home from work.” He looked back up to meet her eyes again. “And thought of you.”

Yor felt her face warm up again, not from embarrassment, but from the warmth of being… loved? Was that it? The revelations she’d had in the past week made it seem unlikely, but she certainly felt like she was being loved.

“Papa and Mama are going to kiss!” Anya exclaimed. Yor’s attention turned back down to the girl looking back and forth between the two parents and felt the embarrassment creep back in.

Instead of loudly protesting with a “no” like she usually would, Yor just… considered it. And how, erm… nice it sounded.

Loid drew her attention again with a sigh as he leaned down to gently pull Anya off his leg. “Why don’t you go put your stuff down in your room, and we’ll get a snack for you once you’re out?”

Anya grumbled about being kept out of the “juicy stuff,” but went as she was asked.

Yor managed to shake herself out of her daze enough to walk over to where Loid was, first helping him out of his coat to hang it by the door, and then taking the bouquet from him. “I’ll put these in a vase. Thank you so much for these, Loid.”

And then, with a burst of confidence from she didn’t know where, Yor leaned up on her tiptoes and kissed him. Just on the cheek, but still.

Then, too afraid to see how he would react to that, she hurried to the kitchen to get a vase and prepare the flowers. Loid did follow her a few moments later, setting to work on preparing Anya’s snack.

Yor went to place the vase on the table, listening to Loid and Anya’s banter absentmindedly as she carefully checked the arrangement to see that it was nicely done.

As she drew back to admire it finally, one hand lingered, and she was suddenly struck by a bit of melancholy. These flowers were beautiful, of course, but cut off from their roots, they wouldn’t stay alive very long, no matter how much water they had.

She couldn’t do much for the flowers. But Yor  would not let herself be cut off from her family.

If you have questions about Loid and the flowers like my brother did, I will simply ask you to please wait until the next chapter, because that should clear things up. Probably. If I did my job right. *sweats nervously* Thanks for reading! I hope you enjoyed it! Please leave a comment! I love hearing what people think about my work (even if I'm not the best about replying)! Previous | Next

[fairestwriting]

I really loved your dragon form headcannon/scenario. So that got me thinking. What about headcannon about being the mates of Leona, malleus, jade, and Lilia? And what that entails for their s/o?

hi tysm!!! im glad you liked it that was a very fun post to make. thank you for this question also it was interesting to think about! i hope i covered enough points with this little analysis

Leona Kingscholar

He's a prince, therefore, a public, and political, figure. Being his mate means you'll get dragged into this, partly.

There's an expectation from his family and people that you'll have a specific image to keep, but, well. Leona sucks at doing his own image upkeep, so they won't be surprised if you do too.

The social consequences are kind of depressing in general? While people won't mess with you, they won't think highly of you either. Leona isn't really well liked, so if you care about others' approval a lot, well...

Leona himself is also... troublesome, to say the least. He's lazy, stubborn and prideful. That doesn't go away even in a relationship.

He's usually easygoing and makes sure you're feeling loved, though, doing his best to keep his selfishness at bay because he cares about you so much. But he does still have a lot to work through, and that requires patience.

Oh, and he gets jealous easily. The kind of guy who wraps his arms around you if anyone looks at you wrong and grumbles about you being his only.

Malleus Draconia

Like Leona, he's in a royal family, so being with him makes you part of it, too.

But since Malleus is Malleus, you won't just be seen as a prince's mate -- You're a terrifying prince's mate, and other people will definitely keep away from you just as they do with him.

There are a lot of expectations that come with being with him, even more than Leona since he will actually be king one day. The image upkeep in his case will be more complicated.

Malleus himself treats you so well, though. He's a softie under all those layers of scariness. He'll protect you with his life and make sure you feel so loved and safe.

He'll feel bad some of his responsibilities will get pushed onto you, too, and if you find any of it overwhelming, he's always willing to try to keep you away from the public eye.

Also possessive, though he never expected himself to be. But he'll rarely have to act on these urges, no one in their right mind would really dare to mess with Malleus' partner.

Jade Leech

Like with Malleus, people are going to be terrified of you, with the addition of wondering if you're insane for choosing him of all people to be with you.

Both at NRC and at his homeland, if he takes you there. Jade's a scary guy, no one wants to mess with him, or with anybody he cares about. If you're the sort of person who gets made fun of often, that will just... cease to happen the second you get together.

Despite the intimidation, Jade is very loving. He'll take good care of you, and will do everything to protect you -- Everything in its literal meaning, though. He may not be as likely to get violent as his brother, but he's just as willing.

Also, if you two are serious, he's very possessive. Again, he won't be violent in most situations, but he will abuse his own scariness to keep people away from you. You're Jade's mate after all. Not anyone else's.

Lilia Vanrouge

Dating Lilia is actually surprisingly easy? He's very openminded and mature, and he can be very caring and sweet. The act of being with him itself is something that won't bring you trouble.

The one personal issue you might have with him is if you're bothered by him not telling you everything -- He's seen and done a lot, and might be involved in some... less than savory things to this day. He'll feel shady at times. Obviously he won't hurt someone he loves, but he also won't tell you certain things about himself.

When it comes to the social consequences of being Lilia's partner, they're mostly just... curiosity. He's fairly respected in his homeland, but also recognized as a bit of an oddball, plus with the age factor, people just wouldn't expect that him of all people would fall for someone.

He gets invited to events by other nobles and notorious people quite often, and if you're there as his plus one, you can expect a lot of questions. The people just want to know who is the sort of person that managed to get Lilia Vanrouge like this.

People definitely won't mess with you though, especially those who know about Lilia's capacity.

[astaroth1357]

Demon Brothers as Roommates

Intro:

So, the MC has left the Devildom and, of course, everybody is quite sad… But this time around, they have a little trick up their sleeve. With just a bit of magic (and training thanks to Solomon) the MC can now summon one of their favorite demon boys up to the human world with them! There's just, uh, one problem though… After being summoned to their side, their beloved demon now refuses to leave it.

Alright MC, enjoy your new demonic roommate!!

Lucifer

Apparently Lucifer is on sabbatical… And yes, he does appreciate that irony in that.

Lucifer actually has a surprising amount of human world money stashed away in alias accounts (because this man renting a cheap motel on business trips? Let's be real) so he uses that wealth to get them a place befitting his standards… which are high.

Spacious apartments in nice areas that would make even the upper middle-class shit their pants? Congrats, MC, that's where you're staying now!

Even with all that money, though, Lucifer CANNOT sit idle for a second. The guy is used to working all his life and just sitting around would drive him insane!

Expect him to still be running some Devildom affairs long-distance style while doing something else on the side, probably stock market stuff tbh.

Is going to want to pay for and provide everything himself but will respect the MC if they still want to work and split the bills (not to a ridiculous degree, though, like half-and-half because that would mean getting three jobs at least).

A lot of trips and vacations too, especially if the MC likes to travel. It’s a good excuse to relax while also technically doing something so he doesn’t lose his mind doing nothing in particular.

He is going to be that strict roommate who expects you not to be a slob and isn't afraid to say so. Regularly scheduled cleaning/organization days are mandatory because hygiene is important. Take some pride in yourself and wash up, MC. That kind of thing.

Also going to have short-fuse for… antics. If you want to prank him, do so at your own risk because he may prank back (and that’s not nearly as fun as it sounds, trust me.)

Mammon

Yeah so, living with Mammon is like the inverse of Lucifer. Prepare to be poooor.

Man has no human money, are you kidding me? Even if he did, he wouldn’t keep it for very long. Couples budgeting is a MUST if you’re looking to survive.

The apartment is going to be whatever the MC can more or less afford on their own with Mammon shoved in somewhere like a cheap lamp… Don’t expect a lot of room.

However, Mammon is great at the hustle. Man can work multiple jobs and actually be pretty dang good at them. For the most part, anyway. He may occasionally trip up and get himself fired, but he bounces back quick.

If the MC isn’t so moral he can also uh… “find” some extra money lying around too. Just be careful when playing with fire, right?

Even if they’re poor as shit, Mammon is still a blast to be around. The guy knows how to have fun on and off of a budget. Lots of “window shopping” (getting kicked out of stores for goofing off), nightclubs, amusement parks, and cheap fun. They’ll never be without a story to tell or a smile on their face!

He IS pretty slobbish though. He’s not going to remember to clean up after himself unless told, but he’s also not going to be bothered if they don’t do the same thing. A weekly cleaning day is going to be ideal unless they don’t mind living in a pigsty...

Prank waaaaars!! The kind of guy to get them both water guns and have a war in the middle of the apartment complex. Good luck getting any rest with Mammon around.

Leviathan 

Whelp, your room is now his room, quite literally MC. You had to pick the shut-in…

The guy isn’t exactly poor but what human money he does have is all wrapped up in his many interests… Merch interests specifically. 

Thankfully, he won’t take up too much space. Put him in a room with a desk, bed (or bathtub), TV, and computer and he’s good to go! 

He’s not going to be a complete bum, thankfully. There’s no way that they can get him to leave the apartment, but he can run small online stores (usually anime themed) or become a streamer. Probably enough to help pay the bills, but not much more.

If they don’t mind having a literally permanent housemate, then being with Levi has its own kind fun. Lots of anime marathons, movie nights, and game nights. Really, it’s just like how he was in the House, but now transported to the human world.

Is probably going to want a pet goldfish, snake ,or lizard so prepare to house Henry 3.0.

When he does leave the apartment, it’s to take the MC to conventions, concerts, or anime stores. He always manages to get just enough money for these trips, but never says where the money comes from… Best not to ask. Could be black market for they know...

… He’s a shut-in. He’s a shut-in roommate. Hygiene isn’t exactly his main concern. If they ask him to, he’ll make sure to clean up after himself, but he may need a reminder.

Can have a fun side, but just don’t mess with his stuff too much. He doesn’t need a Mammon 2.0 around too...

Satan

He's either hatching a plan for world domination or adopting 10 cats… One or the other.

About as poor as Mammon at first, but threat not. He won’t be for very long. Satan is intelligent beyond his years (or equivalent his years maybe?) so he’ll probably net himself several degrees within a couple semesters like a certified prodigy.

At that point, there really isn’t much to worry about (aside from student loans, join our pain Satan) but he can sell himself just fine and probably get some high paying job like a lawyer or doctor or whatever… I’m not jealous…

They’ll start out in a pretty modest place, but there will be upgrades fairly quickly when he starts racking it in so Satan’s a fairly decent choice as a roommate.

He does still have that nasty habit of breaking things when he’s pissed off, but that can be subverted by getting a pet! Just hold up whatever cat you own when he’s about to rampage then declare that he’s scaring/upsetting them and he’ll stop in his tracks. Works every time!

Probably going to be the most domestic out of the brothers. He enjoys cooking (and ain’t half bad at it either), shopping is a practical necessity, he’ll take care your pets like they were his own flesh and blood, etc.

There will even to be points where he’s in bed reading in the middle of the night with tea and reading glasses like some kind of grandma so take that image for what you will.

Satan is the prankster of the household, but he does his pranks more as a way to give grief to his enemies rather than for funsies. Be warned, if you poke this bear he will retaliate for sweet, sweet revenge and he has centuries worth of pranks behind him. Good luck.

Asmodeus 

It's a new party every night, sweetie, get used to it!

Asmo is the only other brother who has some amount of money to offer from his own trips to the human world, but it's just a modest amount.

Is totally willing to work to help pay for a nice place. He wants a building nice enough to host parties!

Would go back to modeling and maybe dip his toe into acting from time to time… He gets a lot of gigs (this IS the Avatar of Lust after all) so they won't be strapped for cash. Which is good, because Asmo is a very "business by day, but party every night" kind of person. 

Do know that his shopping is NOT going to slow down either. Keep an eye on the budget.

He’s also going to make friends wherever he goes so he’s going to want for them all to hang out at least somewhat regularly.

That being said, he can tone it down some if the MC so desires, just know that they can’t keep him cooped up in the apartment for too long or he’ll start getting antsy. You can’t keep this stallion locked up, MC, he needs to run free!!

Being with Asmo is going to be like having a free pass to whatever gathering the MC wants to go to, at least. He could even get them into red carpet events with just his sheer charisma, charm, and er-… “charms.” Who doesn’t want to meet their favorite actress or singer, eh?

But oh, sweetie, please don’t prank him! Life is too short to waste on silly games (he also just genuinely just doesn’t enjoy being messed with so best not do it).

Beelzebub 

Brave choice, MC, but quick question. How in the world are you going to pay your food bills???

Beel is a real sweetheart through and through but his stomach is NOT. That thing will eat them out of house and home! (Maybe even literally!!) Both of them are going to have to work and probably some pretty looong hours (cause he’s got no money either).

Honestly, Beel would be best as a personal trainer in the human world. He’s a pretty decent combination of tough but genuinely kind and motivating. (The fact that he’s pretty easy on the eyes would help out a lot too).

But the MC won’t have to worry about Beel sneaking off with someone just looking for some “quality time.” He’d take his job seriously, though he’s not particularly versed in what the human body can’t handle so only the really dedicated (or masochistic) would stick with him anyway.

“Good work last week, April! You did so well that we’re going to go from 500 pushups to a thousand! … I can see you’re worried, but I believe in you.”

But hey, he can deadlift well over 2,000 pounds without breaking a sweat so who has the balls to argue with him, anyway?

Trying out every restaurant in town would be a must. He’d even plan out vacations for them with the sole purpose of travelling the globe and tasting the different flavors. Food trips!!

He's neat enough since he used to tidy up a lot for Belphie so no need to worry about him picking up after himself (except for the occasional pile of wrappers. Toss those out unless you want ants)

I mean, you can prank Beel if you want. He'll be pretty good-natured about it as long as it stays harmless. Just don't ruin any of his food, got it?

Belphegor 

So… Belphie makes for some excellent décor! Really he is great at laying around and looking fantastic just… he’s not that great at much else...

Realistically, choosing Belphie as a roommate is kind like having a high maintenance pet. He’s good for love and cuddles, but he’s not going to be helping with the bills or anything unless they whine incessantly about it.

If the MC can make enough for the both of them, then it should be fine. They won’t get upset and he won’t be crabby but if not… Oh boy.

Regular job Belphie is a needy Belphie. He’ll come back from whatever job he’s working, likely a night shift, and demand attention or cuddles right then and there. He needs to recharge those batteries, after all...

If he isn’t working then he's at his happiest. He can even pull off being a “househusband” of sorts. He’s not going to go above and beyond the call of duty, but he can keep the place clean, get a basic meal on the table (provided someone teaches him some human recipes), and get groceries if he needs to… You know, basic domestic shit.

They’re going to have to come to terms with the fact that, at some level, Belphie just doesn’t believe in “common curtesy” or “human decency.” If some neighbors are being too noisy for his liking, he will troll them to oblivion and beyond. He may even get sued for it if he takes it too far, so the MC will have to keep an eye on him…

He’s the House’s #2 prankster, but unlike Satan he doesn’t need any malice to be a little shit. The MC will be pranked and it will be at the most unexpected times. Be warned...

Check out my Masterlist for more!

[melo-yello]

💤Can’t Sleep💤 w/ 💥🪨KiriBaku🪨💥 HeadCanons

Pairing(s): KiriBaku X black!reader, Eijirou Kirishima X Katsuki Bakugou X black!reader

A/N: fluff and ANGST. Like lots of ANGST. I had a rough week and honestly not very much sleep. What can I say. Sue me, I wanna hug and somebody to watch a movie with.

💤💥🪨 Lay on your stomach opening and closing your eyes as you try and convince yourself to sleep. Kirishima snores softly with an arm around Bakugou’s waist. He’s been pretty stressed lately so he gets to be middle spoon. Baku in turn has an arm draped over your shoulders.

💤💥🪨 The soft and peaceful looks on the boys’ faces are nothing but safe and warm and reassuring . Yet here you are unavailable to close your eyes long enough to drift off to sleep. Each time you close your eyes your heart attempts to tear a whole through your chest. The dim red light of the clock reads 2:56 as you slip out of Baku’s embrace for a glass of water

💤💥🪨 You settle on Jasmine tea instead. Quietly pulling a the kettle from the cabinet and turning on the tap just before placing it on the stove. You busy yourself in your phone in order to banish any form of thought from your head. Soon just blankly browsing through TikToks as you wait for the water to boil

💤💥🪨 The hair on the back of your neck stands at attention as you hear heavy footsteps and the creaking of the bedroom door. Short angry grumbles are traded with deep groggy grunts as the footsteps close in on your position. You glance up to see the time is now 3:22 and you hear the kettle whistling for the first. Mostly likely what woke your boyfriends to begin with. You scowl at the kettle.

💤💥🪨 “fuck you.” you curse under your breath snatching up the kettle to quiet it’s shouting as the two set of red eyes fix on you in the dim light of kitchen. Kiri’s long red hair pulled back into a messy plat, and Baku’s fluffy ash blonde sticking out in all directions except for the right side flatten to the side of his skull

💤💥🪨 “Oí, Chuchu Soul, do you have any idea what time it is?!!” Baku squints tiredly placing a hand on his hip. “That’s actually a good one.” You giggle surprised by his creativity. “I know right?! And they used to call him uncreative.” Kirishima smirks between a yawn. “ Well?” Bakugou’s features don’t change. More likely mad that he’s awake at this ungodly hour than anything else. “Was it another panic attack, Pebble?” Kiri questions walking to rest his hand on your lower back. You don’t acknowledge his soft gesture and busy yourself with pouring the newly hot water into your large mug with it’s awaiting tea bag.

💤💥🪨 “Run that shit back, Eiji?!? When was this?” Bakugou’s foggy apathetic sleepiness raises to concerned confusion . You curse under your breath for the third time tonight. Kiri racks his tired brain for an explanations as he trades tired glances between the temperamental blonde and the vaguely suspicious one blowing at tea. “Pebble you didn’t tell him about Friday Night?” He frowns looking down at you. “...i forgot...” you whisper sipping the overly hot tea and burning your tongue. Hell you wouldn’t have told him either, but he was right beside you when it happened.

💤💥🪨 That Friday night. You couldn’t speak. You stood in a dark room. Small and cramped. No windows. No doors. Just glowing ink on one wall in barely legiable font. Prove It. As soon as you touched the lettering it went blood red and the water began to pool at your feet. You begin to lose your composure trying to find an exit. In seconds the water is at your waist. Then your neck. Then the ceiling. Like that you’re choking and sputtering trying to find. The walls go translucent. Larger than life figures with unmistakable silhouettes and Pro hero customs hold your box in each hand. You bang tight fists to gain their attention. Your blood mixes with the water and you could barely breath. You thrashed across the sheets desperately trying to snatch yourself from your current nightmare. Suddenly Kiri shaking you awake and he’s coaching you into breathing again.

💤💥🪨 The memory of utter helplessness washes over you all over again. You sigh in frustration as tears pool at the corner of your eyes. “Come here, Pebs.”

💤💥🪨 Without another word, Kiri scoops you up bridal style and takes a seat on the couch placing you in his lap. Baku takes the seat next to him gently taking the hot tea from your trembling hands. You hadn’t even realized they were shaking until you touched his steady ones. “Babes, we hafta talk about this. Including Friday, this makes 3 days of shitty sleep. That’s not good or sustainable, Knucklehead.” Bakugou sighs placing the mug on the coffee table before wiping away a tear rolling down your cheek.

💤💥🪨 “It’s not like I don’t wanna do better, Kats. Eiji. I’m just...” you trail off mid explanation. You clasp fingers over your soft lips. Opening twice to speak, but only croaks come out. You try very hard to find a tangible reason for your reluctance to sleep, but there were none. Kiri squeezes your shoulders reassuringly and plants a gentle kiss on the top of your bonnet.

💤💥🪨 “We know you’re trying, love. It’s ok to be scared sometimes. Even the resident hardass, Katsuki still gets nightmares.” Kiri offers doing his best to let you ride these feelings out while comforting you as well. “Yea.”Baku’s grip tightens at the mention of his own nightmares before leaning his head on your legs

💤💥🪨 “I just can’t trust it ok! It’s scary. I’m panicking in sleep now?!! I’m only getting worse and now I crying about. FUCK! I’m just a scared bitchy crybaby who can’t sleep.” You sigh overwhelmed by all the physical closeness and their consistent and unwavering support. You mentally kick yourself for the not realizing sooner that you trusted them enough to hurt like this in front of them. There’s something that unnerves you about that. Tears streaming at full force at this piont

💤💥🪨Kiri holds you firmly to chest tucking your shaking form under his chin. Baku moves to wrap an embrace overlapping Kiri’s arms. “Just let it all out, Babygirl.” He hums leaning his head on your shoulder. Your chest tightens and your fingers curl into angry fists. Suddenly your frighteningly fierce temper rears it’s ugly head.

💤💥🪨 “No no no NO! Stop It! STOP ACTING SO NICE! STOP ACTING LIKE I DESRVE THIS! BE DISAPPOINTED! BE UPSET!! TELL ME TO TRY HARDER! TELL ME TO TAKE BETTER CARE OF MYSELF! TELL ME IT’S EASY! REALLY EASY! BE ANGRY I’M FUCKING IT ALL UP! BLAME ME! I BLAME ME! I blame me... I blame me for not being...better.” You fume trying to push them away. You do your best to squirm out of their gentle comfort and tender embrace your lovers have you wrapped in. Neither one of your boys moves. “No way, Pebs.” Kirishima says resolutely. “Not a fucking chance, Teddy.” Bakugou nods with the same unchanging confidence. The rage in your chest melts as fat tears and roll down your brown cheeks.

💤💥🪨 A heaving and broken sob racks your entire body as you fall apart in their arms. Anger subsides into terrified uncertainty and overwhelming futility settles in its place. Tears and mucus flood down your face and soak Kiri’s t-shirt. Sniffles from above draws you out of the dark thoughts swarming around you. Surely enough tears drip slowly down Kiri’s cheeks. Instinctively you cup his face with trembling hands. “...Sorry.. I’ll be strong...just gimme a sec” he mutters as his broad shoulders slump and he moves to bat away the falling droplets. Bakugou grabs his hand and kisses it while wiping the red head’s face. “Eijirou, you don’t have to. Not right now” You sputter between choppy breaths.

💤💥🪨 His usually unwavering features muddy with insecurity. A fairly uncommon expression for someone so death defyingly optimistic and confident. “But it’s what I’m good at. If I can’t be strong for the people I love most then what good am I?” He retorts apathetically tightening his grip as the tears still trickle. You slink an arm around his hips, and place your face to his chest. “Bullshit. You’re plenty strong enough for us, Eijirou. Stop being so hard headed!” Bakugou raves putting a hand behind his neck and his forehead against his for emphasis before continuing, “You’re allowed to feel more than one thing. You are complex and unique and fearless and fearful all in one. You’re human, Eiji. It’s ok.”

💤💥🪨 “Katsuki, you’re so compassionate and kind.” You hum softly and absentmindedly almost. You don’t know why this observation came but it just feels right. Eiji smiles leaning in the blonde’s embrace. “Honestly Kats, you love remarkably deep and painfully unselfishly. Thank you.” Kiri hums kissing his cheek and you do the same. Hot little tears rest at the corners of his dark red eyes. Most of the public thinks he’s some kind of angry asshole devoid of any softer emotions. Comments on your relationship often criticized Katsuki for snagging partners ‘much nicer than he deserved’. And just like that you are scooting over to make room for Bakugou in Kiri’s lap. 

💤💥🪨 “Such a shitty little week.” Baku sighs with misty eyes. There’s a small comfort in the collective collapse washing over the three of you. All of you holding the hurt from the others in hopes it would just fizzle away like a bad dream. It didn’t. You sob, Kiri sniffles, and Baku lets two hot tear slip from his glassy eyes. None of you break contact with each other. Your fingers linked with Kiri and Baku’s in the opposite hand. A head glued affectionately onto the red head’s broad shoulder. After what seems like a lifetime and you can’t cry anymore and feeling a surprising amount of relief sinks onto you, you clear your throat.

💤💥🪨 “Wanna watch How to Train a Dragon?” You rasp with tired and strained vocal chords. “I’ll get the popcorn.” Kiri sighs kissing each of you on the cheek as he ushers you both out of his lap. He sashays into the kitchen to find a bowl and the popcorn. Baku stands handing you your cool tea as he grabs the remote. Flipping decisively through Amazon Prime, he queues up the movie as he settles onto the far side of the couch to lay out fully. You sip contently tucking your knees to your chest so you can press the soles of your feet into his. “That tickles.” Bakugou deadpans wiggling his own toes. Soft giggles flutter out of your chest.

💤💥🪨 Kiri strolls back in the room with two large bowls of popcorn and a blanket on each arm. He bows presenting them to their proper owners. Movie theater butter for Baku and kettle corn for you two to share. You sit your now empty mug on the coffee table as Kiri retakes his original spot and you settle comfortably into his lap cocooning you both in a cozy weighted blanket. Baku draped in a light throw typically the first to complain about being hot. The DreamWorks title sequence floats across the screen, and wave of peacefulness falls over the tired trio. Less then five minutes in, you and Bakugou snore quietly as Kiri’s heavy eyelids fight to watch the next couple scenes

[youryanderedaddy]

Love Fuel

Summary: You were Jason’s first love before you broke his heart and rejected him. It’s all your fault that he can’t move on.

Tw: female reader, obsessive behavior, incel behavior, nice guy behavior, self - hatred, threats of non-con, implied non - con, implied masturbation, bullying based on appearance (not reader), deregatory language, kidnapping, misogyny, generalizations, stalking

this is a hot mess but its 1 am and i am tired, ik that incels are bad irl (obviously), but this is fiction and I kinda wanted to explore the dynamic and shit. 

Everyone used to call him JJ or The-Big-Jay back in high school. Well, most of the time his classmates weren’t really calling out to him or even talking to him, the names were whispered behind his back, after he had just passed the hallway, or on bad days - right to his face. The jocks, these dumb motherfuckers, would beat him up, mock him for whatever stupid reasons they had chosen to use as an excuse to torment the smaller and weaker. The popular girls would giggle like brainless bimbos as Kyle or Brad or any other football player stole his glasses or continuously punched him in the guts until he threw up all over the floor. Even the nerds, the kids at the bottom of the school hierarchy, messed with Jason from time to time when they wanted to feel the oh - so desired rush of power they so rarely managed to experience. 

Looking back, Jason could see why his classmates hated him so much - he was everything that society deemed as wrong and unattractive. He was thin, pale, “scrawny” as the others called him, on the shorter side, and on top of that the teen was terribly shy and introverted, never having the guts to stand up to his bullies or even tell someone about the abuse. The male spent most of his free time at home, playing hours upon hours of video games, watching anime and reading books he was simply too young to understand or look critically at. As he grew older, the man began to view the world as it trully was - a dark, miserable place that ate up sore losers like him. Men were primitive and foolish, which somehow managed to soften their faults. Women, on the other hand, were  calculative and manipulative, greedy and sinful. His whole life they had done nothing but reject him when he needed love and support the most. Of course, there were many other reason why the brunette detested the weaker sex. In his eyes women were evil two - faced sluts, showing off their bodies yet acting innocent and hurt once someone finally decided to use them for the only thing they were actually good for.

But you Jason hated the most. You reminded him that no matter how much he hated the outside world, he would always hate himself the most. He had to admit you were pretty, painfully so, with a perfect little body to match your looks and a sweet sugary smile that almost deceived him years ago. As much as the man regretted his weakness, he had fallen right into your trap at the time.

You weren’t the most popular girl, but you had your fair share of friends, all nice and loyal like puppies. You weren’t the smartest either, but unlike the other stupid giggling sluts you always tried to do your best. You were beautiful just like them but you were actually kind to the pathetic bullied kid no one else bothered to acknowledge even existed outside of being a punching bag. You always asked him whether he was alright and often took him to the infirmary when he looked paler and sicker than usual. You talked to him as if he was a normal human being and despite the initial doubt, Jason appreciated it. 

It was the last day of your senior year when the teen finally gained the courage to confess. He was shaking the whole time and by the end of his little speech there were small tears in the corner of his eye. You were the first girl the male cared about, the first one to show him kindness, to offer him friendship without asking for something in return. You were the only one who could make him feel deserving of love, worthy of affection. And then you took it all away in a matter of seconds.

“I am sorry, bud.” You had said that day after giving him a  half - hearted hug and an apologetic smile, that started to seem more and more like a mocking grin the longer the teen started at you. “I already have a boyfriend, but I am really flattered. I am sure that you will find a lovely girl once you start college.” You had added quickly, cheerfully, rubbing the salt all over his wounds, honey dripping from your plump red lips. He had wanted to kiss them, bruise them, bite them until your stupid lying mouth was filled with blood. Obviously you didn’t have a boyfriend or he would have known by now, he stalked your social media religiously after all. Even if you had one, he probably treated you like shit. And how could you even suggest him finding another woman? As if he wanted any of the stupid money - grabbing sluts out there. As if some of them could replace you.

The boy was too furious to form a proper response besides “Fuck you, bitch”. His cheeks turned red and he didn’t realise that the bitter words had escaped his lips before he could stop them, then his legs took him far away from that shithole of a school. He didn’t manage to see your reaction before running away but it didn’t matter anymore. You were just like the others. 

***

That day Jason swore to show you just how small and insignificant you had made him feel. He wanted to see you crumble, cry and beg for forgiveness, desperate for his love but never good enough to get it. The man formed a plan to change himself and come back for you once he had erased each and every trace of his past. The brunette came to terms with his terrible social anxiety and decided that he needed to gain social abilities more than anything. That’s why, as much as he dreamt of working from home as a boring programmer with an even more boring, but flexible working schelude, the male chose to study something that involved a lot more human interactions. The next step was to hit the gym for the first time and get a monthly subscription. It wasn’t hard to see that females nowadays liked brain - dead athletes with defined jawline and cheekbones, toned chests and strong muscled bodies, so if he wanted to impress you, he had to look his best. It wasn’t easy at first - it felt like everyone in the fitness salon had their eyes on his weak frame, laughing and pointing their fingers at his imperfections, but things gradually got better as time went on. The trainings became easier to get through and from time to time they even helped the man forget about his loneliness and nihilism. 

Jason soon returned to his old habbit of spending hours looking through your accounts - Facebook, Instagram, Twitter, he knew all of your usernames, each post, every picture and text. He couldn’t believe how much of a desperate attention whore you had become over the years. The male remembered you in your long brown skirts, cozy sweatshirts and pure-white shirts, all the gray buttons closed to the very top, blushing, laughing, smiling like the adorable Goody-two-shoes you were. Now you were smirking seductively in every photo, overconfident and vibrant, flaunting your tits for every man to see and wearing tight little dresses that barelly covered your ass combined with heels so high and sharp they could be used as a weapon. You were such a stupid slut it was disgusting, and he couldn’t stop himself from jerking off every single time he saw your pretty little face on the screen. He wanted to cum down your throat so badly it was ridiculous, and even after knowing that you had probably already had hundreds of cocks shoved deep inside your pussy, the brunette still wished to see you split open on his, taking his lenght like a good little cocksleeve. 

***

The moment when he could see you again finally came. How many years had passed since graduation - five, ten, fifthteen? It hardly mattered. Jason was successful, at last. The male had his own business that was doing surprisingly well, there were some guys from the gym he could call friends and the best thing, he looked absolutely unrecognizable. There was nothing left of the tiny scrawny kid with quiet voice that everyone stepped over, he was now replaced by a strong capable man, determined to get what was rightfully his and his alone.

It wasn’t hard to find you since the brunette knew everything about you - where your job was, what time you finished, how long it took you to go home and what path you took. You lived alone and worked as a barista in a small local cafe even now that you had finished your studies in your dream faculty. Turns out the princess wasn’t so great and smart after all, having to resort to working a minimal - wage job day and night just to be able to pay her rent. Jason was absolutely delighted though, he loved your stupid dead - end job and your endless struggles to survive in the materialistic world honestly and fairly without selling yourself like a common whore. On one hand the male was happy that you had clung onto your last bit of innocence and on the other your pitiful lifestyle gave him the chance to snatch you away much easier. And that’s exactly what he did.

 ***

You woke up confused just like he had expected, bombarding him with questions, asking him who he was was, begging him to let you go, to at least explain what’s happening. You were so dumb, but God, you were still so pretty, if not prettier than before. You cried so beautifully when Jason told you you belonged to him now and you cried even more when he slammed his cold rough lips over yours in a deep wet kiss. You whimpered and whined while the male sucked on your lower lip and bit down, good, he wanted it to hurt. The stalker couldn’t wait to be inside you, he couldn’t hold back anymore. 

He climbed on top of you and pinned your wrists to the floor before tying them up with delicate red rope and tightening it. It wasn’t like the man was scared of you slipping away and hurting him, you were too weak and tiny to stand a chance against his years of power - lifting and muscle - training anyways, he just wanted you to be as uncomfortable and squirmish as possible. Your tormentor wished for you to be in worse pain than he had been during his youthful years, and he knew exactly what to do. Next thing you knew Jason had ripped your dress apart, leaving you vulnerable and exposed in just your plain old panties and bra. Cold shivers ran down your spine when the chilly air hit your naked flesh and you finally realized there wasn’t getting away from this. You had to stay there, limbs bound together, unable to move or fight back, the stranger’s hands caressing your neck before moving dangerously close to your clothed breasts. You felt so sick you were going to throw up for sure if your abductor didn’t step back so you decided to use your last resort.

“Jason, please stop!” You screamed out of the blue, forcing the brunette to freeze instantly at the use of his birth name. You had already called him a pervert and a psycho which didn’t seem to faze him, but the name clearly caught him off guard. This only seemed to prove your theory further - the man really was your former classmate, despite the only similarity between them being the dark distant look in his eyes. “I beg you, don’t hurt me!” You continued, hoping to at least buy yourself more time before the assault took place. 

He gulped loudly and stared at your quivering form. The impossible had happened, you had recognized him and now together with fear, there was also pity in your gaze, the one emotion your captor absolutely despised. You used to be the only one who pitied him, and even now that he was bigger, better and stronger than before, you still had the guts to pity him. It drove him insane but any attempt to hurt or touch you was fruitless now - your soft skin was suddenly burning his fingers like hellfire. 

“You must be thinking that I am a monster.” Jason started out dryly, chuckling bitterly, humorlessly even. He clenched his fists unconsciously and brought them to the floor in a fit of rage, missing your head by mere inches. Your heart was beating like crazy and you only hoped the mandman couldn’t hear it. “A freak.” The man spat out the word like it was a curse and for a split second his eyes softened before turning into two spinning torches. “Right?” You were sure that if looks could kill, his would have you dead by the end of the night so you quickly nodded your head no.

“You are lying to me again, pretty girl.” The brunette replied feisty, "pretty” rolling off his tongue like an insult. Then he broke into hoarse maniac laugher and lowered his head so his face leveled up with yours, so close you could feel his warm breath on your tear - stained cheek. “When I am done with you, you wouldn’t be so pretty anymore, darling.” Your captor growled and attacked your neck, sinking his teeth deep into the flesh. “You will see exaclty how ugly my love is.”

[glattandblade]

Fluff Alphabet with C!Technoblade

By Author Glatt

hi! so heres a filler inbetween fics, im currently writing 3 and im trying to take my time, so in the mean time i whipped up this, im also posting an nsfw one later :)

Warnings: none

Hc Template by: @ magical-warlock 

A ctivities - What do they like to do with their s/o? How do they spend their free time with them?

Techno usually likes to stay inside, cuddling you and bonding over books you read, sometimes you guys go adventuring together but techno is pretty protective

B eauty - What do they admire about their s/o? What do they think is beautiful about them?

Techno could care less about looks, but he usually prefers his s/o abit heavier since it reminds him of aphrodite!

C omfort - How would they help their s/o when they feel down/have a panic attack etc.?

Techno would be great at this, having known how it feels. He’d learn what you need, trying not to overwhelm you and just wrap you in a blanket and hand you water/whatever you need and hold you.

D reams - How do they picture their future with their s/o?

Techno doesn't really have a picture in mind, but he does know he will be with his s/o forever, he's dedicated to you, he’s content how it is now, so he’ll do whatever you want

E qual - Are they the dominant one in the relationship, or rather passive?

Dominant! Definitely dominant.

F ight - Would they be easy to forgive their s/o? How are they fighting?

It would take a lot to piss off techno, considering he’s head over heels with you, it would take a bit to forgive you.

G ratitude - How grateful are they in general? Are they aware of what their s/o is doing for them?

Very grateful! Techno is grateful for every day with you, and he thanks the gods they gifted him with you.

H onesty - Do they have secrets they hide from their s/o? Or do they share everything?

Techno likes to be fairly honest about everything, even the voices, but he refuses to reshare anything from battles or certain things the voices say, they don't want to make his s/o uncomfortable or anything.

I nspiration - Did their s/o change them somehow, or the other way around? Like trying out new things or helped them overcome personal problems?

Techno definitely had his life lit up, he was getting rather lonely alone in his cottage, but he looked forward to coming home from battles.

J ealousy - Do they get jealous easily? How do they deal with it?

Techno wouldn't get jealous too easily, he knows you love him as much as he does, although he does have times he gets jealous. 

K iss - Are they a good kisser? What was the first kiss like?

I dont think techno would be too good at kissing at first, his first kiss would be with you, very clumsy but he’d learn quick and get good at it.

L ove Confession - How would they confess to their s/o?

Oh god- it was awkward.  Techno has never done this before, what was the proper way? He asked philza’s opinion, and he ended up on your doorstep with a gold bracelet, and asked to court you.

M arriage - Do they want to get married? How do they propose? What would the marriage be like?

Techno would definitely marry you, i feel he’d propose somewhere you were the most happy (like if you liked going adventuring to x) the marriage would be great, although he was always worried about losing you.

N icknames - What do they call their s/o?

Techno would start calling the reader Porkchop! It kinda stuck, i think it would come from phil! And also princess, hes HUGE on princess/prince, because you are one in his eyes!

O n Cloud Nine - What are they like when they are in love? Is it obvious for others? How do they express their feelings?

Its not obvious at all, people were shocked when it came out you were dating, he never really talked about you and you never did PDA, he likes to keep it in private.

P DA - Are they upfront about their relationship? Do they brag with their s/o in front of others? Or are they rather shy to kiss etc. when others are watching?

Techno prefers not to do PDA, but if asked he will confirm hes in a relationship with you, if you really wanted to he’d hold your hand in public.

Q uirk - Some random ability they have that’s beneficial in a relationship.

He’s quite tall! So it makes for great cuddles, that and i feel like he would always have an instinct to trade, just like piglins. So when you got him gifts, he would give plenty of gifts back :)

R omance - How romantic are they? What would they do to make their s/o happy? Cliché or rather creative?

Techno wouldnt be that romantic at first, hes still getting the hang of it, but as time goes on he would be more romantic, he’d be rather creative.

S upport - Are they helping their s/o achieve their goals? Do they believe in them?

Of course! Techno would reassure you and do everything in his power to help achieve your goals.

T hrill - Do they need to try out new things to spice out your relationship? Or do they prefer a certain routine?

He’d be down to try out new things, but he prefers to keep to a certain routine

U nderstanding - How good do they know their partner? Are they empathetic?

He knows you pretty well, and he is empathetic but sometimes you get into fights bc hes a sarcastic asshole and he doesn't seem sarcastic and seems /srs

V alue - How important is the relationship to them? What is it’s worth in comparison to other things in their life?

It means so much to him. Man would be taken back to be executed if it meant your safety

W ild Card - A random Fluff Headcanon.

Techno gets embarrassed by it, but he loves when you scratch the back of his ears, it feels nice! If hes having a rather bad day, you guys will cuddle and you’ll just scratch his ears

X OXO - Are they very affectionate? Do they love to kiss and cuddle?

In private? Fuck yes. Man is rather touchy

Y earning - How will they cope when they’re missing their partner?

Well, hes usually out killing, so killing (get it ig) he’d be kinda urked and you could tell lol

Z eal - Are they willing to go to great lengths for the relationship? If so, what kind of?

Like stated, he’d sacrifice himself for you, he’s hell-bent on keeping you safe, since he's such a big target from everyone.

Masterlist

[toastedside]

In Health

Batmom!Reader x Batfamily

Warning: Angst, Angry Tim Drake

Note: I knoooooow it's been a while since I wrote this series and I actually have finished it a while ago. Just figure I want to share the rest. Enjoy!

Masterlist, Previous Chapter

You bit the inside of your cheeks, your eyes travelled constantly to the watch on your wrist. The iced coffee you ordered fifteen minutes ago already half gone. Metropolis was bright and sunny that day, the weather was warm and nice. A welcomed contrast to gloomy Gotham with its perpetual cloud.

The coffee shop Lois had told you about was buzzed with hungry patrons, considering it was almost lunchtime anyway. It was a breath of relief that nobody would recognize you on the first glance, something you had learned fairly quickly since Bruce had publicly claimed you years ago. If you went somewhere with shirts and jeans and nothing shiny, nobody would recognize you that you are Y/N Wayne.

You glanced into your watch again for the millionth time that day. Was the request to meet up too much for them? Were you too harsh on them back in the days? It’s unusual for–

“Hey, oh my god, we’re so sorry. Our meeting last longer than we expected.”

Lois suddenly came into frame. Behind her was a slightly disheveled Clark, eyeing her behind his glasses hesitantly. Something sank at the bottom of you stomach by the sight alone, perhaps you were indeed way too harsh on him.

“It’s alright, I didn’t wait that long anyway,” you mustered a white lie as you gestured them to take a seat across yours. “How’s Jon doing? I miss him coming over on the weekend.”

“He is fine. Clark and I bought him a video game console on his birthday and all he’s been doing was glued his eyes on the TV,” Lois rolled her eyes fondly at the topic of her own son, something you've been doing for years since you are a mother too. “How are the kids?”

“I figure Jon had been talking about his video games with Damian. He asked me if he could buy one just yesterday,” you laughed. “The kids are fine, per usual. Dick and Jason had been a little busy with their job, so they usually only come over on the weekend. Damian tried to woo me into adopt another pet again last week, Cass been practicing ballet a lot lately, and Tim... well... it’s been a little tough for him to fill Bruce’s shoes in the company but he’s doing well so far.”

There was a little shift in the air after you finished. Lois subtly adjusted her seat, silently sent a look towards her husband who looked a little too nervous to be comfortable. It would be funny to see Superman himself squirmed on his seat if the reason behind it didn’t left a bitter aftertaste.

“Lunch?” you swiftly opened the menu book to dissipate the growing tension and gently shoved it into Clark’s lap. “It’s on me.”

The lunch was surprisingly normal and calm, the thought of the dreading event was swept away underneath the nonexistent rug. Lois had been talking about the newest article she was writing about and Clark was obviously waltzed around carefully to not touching the superhero business, and you played your best to ignore it.

“Lois, Clark,” you started as everyone finally finished their lunch and the empty plates were taken away. “I am here to apologize for what I have done... three months ago. And what I might have said.”

There was silence hung in the air as Lois and Clark shared a look together. It was Lois who immediately reached for your hand and gently squeezed it. “Hon, you have nothing to apologize for. We understand, you were–”

“It was still rude and uncalled for, and my circumstance was a mere explanation. Especially to you, Clark,” you rolled your shoulders slightly to face Clark better, eyes fell into the balled fist on his lap. “You were only trying to explain, but I shut you out. I know you lost your best friend too that night and I am so sorry I didn’t try to reach you out sooner.”

“Y/N, it’s–”

“No, no, it’s not.” you breathed shakily. You had prepared your best for this inevitable conversation, but still unaware how painful it could be. “Bruce wouldn’t want me to act that way.”

Silence now had fallen completely and the air had shifted drastically. The only thing that grounded you from withering away and succumb into your own thought was Lois’s thumb gently stroking your wrist. Clark was stunned silent on his seat, the gears on his mind worked twice harder than it usually did in past three months. Nothing had prepared him for this conversation.

“Y/N, I forgive you. I already had long ago. I understand completely, and I would probably act worse if I were in your shoes,” Clark breathed out. All the tension in his shoulders that hinder him in the last forty-five minutes had dissipated into the thin air.

“Thank you,” you lifted your eyes to meet his. Sometimes you forgot how unnaturally blue his eyes were, cold and calculating, even though the corner of his eyes and the smile lines soften it out. It almost reminded you with Bruce. “Can you... can you tell me what happened that night? You were there with him, didn’t you?”

Lois and Clark shared another look, something told you that both knew what you didn’t. “Are you sure you want to hear this now?”

“I need my closure, Clark. And I’d love to know which son of a bitch that take my husband away.”

Clark told you everything in vivid details, the hairs on your shoulders stood in dread by the explanation alone. He talked about the League mission, the warehouse, and the explosion that had killed Bruce and suspected blown his body into unrecognizable tiny bits. By the time he was finished, you were close to tears, and was pleasantly surprised you didn’t weep your heart outs right away in a public place.

“One question,” you wiped the stubborn tears that started to well on your eyes. You mustered a silent thank you as Clark offered his handkerchief. “Was Red Robin there? Was Red Robin called for backup?”

“I can’t remember. What about him?”

You took a sharp breath, the image of Tim weeping on your lap and repeating his apology played inside your mind like a broken movie. “He obsessively investigating his death, saying it was his fault it happened in the first place.”

Lois tighten her grip on your hand and squeezed harder. It wasn’t a secret that your son was bad at letting go and coping with loss, but it had been a huge toll to knew he blamed himself for it. Clark sent you an apologetic look, and you were surprised that you didn’t dread the look.

“It wasn’t his fault. It was supposed to be an easy investigation, an in-and-out mission. Nobody could come prepared for the explosion,” Clark reassured you, although it was addressed more to Tim instead of you. “The machines...”

A sudden rang from Clark’s phone interrupted his words. He watched it rang briefly before let out a dreading, long sigh. “I’m so sorry, but I really need to take this.”

You smiled reassuringly. “Go on.”

Turns out, Lois and Clark had been called for another meeting and had to cut their meeting short. Lois had hugged you tight and drop a promise to come over by weekend for dinner. Clark left a lingering touch on your wrist, his eyes widen as if he had come into a realization he hadn’t before, but he left before he able to muster any single words.

The ride back to Gotham was long and tedious. The traffic had made the trip an hour and half longer than it was necessary, but the sunset at the horizon was a sight for sore eyes. The chance to catch a beautiful sunset was close to zero in Gotham, so you preserved the moment as much as you could. A little part of your soul wished Bruce could witness such sight with you.

You arrived right before dinnertime, the manor was surprisingly quiet, spared for some noises Alfred made in the kitchen as he prepared for dinner. One thing about Wayne household was silent wasn’t a good thing, and one should be suspicious if it happened.

“Where are the others? It’s eerily quiet.” your head popped up in the kitchen. “Alfred, it smells delicious. Are you making Shepherd’s pie again?”

“Miss Y/N, I would really appreciate it if you didn’t surprise me like that anymore,” Alfred deadpanned. “Yes, I am. How was your meeting?”

“It went well. I... I finally get the explanation I deserved,” you sat across the kitchen island, your bag fell into the floor as you did. “Thank you for convincing me into reaching out to him.”

Alfred pressed his lips together into a pleased smile. “You have found your closure, I assumed?”

“I don’t know about that, Alfred,” you admitted. “But it was great to finally know what happened and not left in the dark. Maybe it was a good step for me.”

“I believe so, Miss Y/N.”

“Are those teas for the kids?” you shifted the topic away into a tray full of teacups and biscuits. “Where are they?”

“All of them are cramped together in Batcave, I believe. Master Damian had asked me to brought them some teas.”

“Let me take it to them. You can continue bake your Shepherd’s Pie again.”

Alfred was hesitant, but he nodded away and shoved the tray into your embrace. It had been long overdue for you to step back into the Batcave anyway, figured this would be a great time for you to go back.

You forgot how much you hated the perpetual coldness the Batcave seemed to persistently have, no matter how many efforts everyone had put years ago into make this place warmer and comfortable. The sound of your children bickering with each other filled the cave and it made you smile, for all of its worth, you had always admired your children’s tendency to find things to argue about.

It was until the sound of fist slammed against the table that stopped you in your track and wiped away your smile.

“Stop it, Timbers, stop this fucking bullshit!” Jason’s voice roared, followed with the ear-ripping screeches of bats that had been awoken from their slumber by his roaring voice alone.

“I am telling you the truth!” Tim said heatedly, which was alarming. You quickly hid yourself in the shadows between the costume displays, finding yourself a better spot to watched your children without being known. “Why can’t you believe me?”

“Look at me in the eye and tell me that was not a fucking bullshit!”

“Tim, bud, come on. You need to stop. This isn’t healthy,” Dick’s concerned voice chimed in between the heated stares Jason and Tim exchanged. Your heart sank from that words alone, Tim must had investigating again. “You have us. We can get through this together. But not like this.”

“TT. Drake, you have started to creep me out,” Damian’s equally concerned voice, albeit masked with his usual scowl and sarcasm, piped in. “Also, you look like you hadn’t sleep since you were born.”

“Thanks for the flattery. But listen–”

“Stop it. Stop. Shut your mouth!” Jason yelled again. His finger intimidatingly pointed towards Tim, his eyes filled with rage and frustration. “Have you heard yourself talking?”

“Won’t you all give me a fucking minute to explain myself?” Tim stood from his chair; his fist crumpled together into a ball clenched on his side. It was such an eerie sight to see him so worked up like this. “Cass?”

You saw Cass silently shook her head. She sent Tim an apologetic smile as Tim groaned in frustration.

“Why none of you would just listen to me?”

“Tim, there is no way in hell Bruce is still alive!”

The roar that came from Dick was eerie, but it was his words that split your world into half. You didn’t realize the tray had slipped from your grasp until it clashed with cold floor, your gasp was masked with the loud clang of the tray hitting the floor and the sound of teacups shattered into pieces. All eyes followed towards the sound, and all were surprised to spot their mother was there.

You saw from the corner of your eyes that Dick walked towards you. His shoulders were tensed, his eyebrows furrowed together in frustration and anger. But your eyes fell on Tim whose eyes widen in horror upon realizing that your unknown presence was lurking all these times. You could mentally see the guilt that slowly seeped through his initial shock, the blue in his eyes waver slightly with the swirling guilt. You walked towards Tim, and from the look on his face alone, you wondered if you looked as if you were about to swallow him whole.

“Mom...” Tim croaked.

“Mom, it’s alright. It was nothing.”

“Ma, let’s go upstairs. It’s dinnertime, you never like it when we–”

“Tim.” The firmness on your voice effectively silence your two oldest sons out. Your hands gently placed on Tim’s shoulders as you shut your eyes and counted from one to ten. “Tell me everything.”

“W-what?”

“Tell me everything you know. Tell. Me. Everything.”

“Mom, I don’t think you should see it.”

“He was my husband, Tim. I deserve to know.”

Tim pressed his lips together, his eyes travelled up slowly before he let out a sigh. “Just tell me to stop when it gets too much.”