#so it's extra painful t o me that he gETS THE CHANCE TO AND MISSES THE DAY HE'S BORN

[selenophobiic]

teddy lupins birth was on the night of a full moon. april 11th 1998. please don't touch me it HURTS.

[imasimpforshanks]

Hello! For the Alphabet Request, could I get the angst Alphabet with Sanji or the fluff alphabet with Zoro, thank you so much! :)

Angst Alphabet - Sanji

a/n: thank you for requesting! I chose the angst alphabet but I kinda regret it now because omg ANGST IS SO HARD IT HURTS TO THINK ABOUT!!! but anywaysssss I hope you enjoy <3

A-Accident (would they blame themselves if you died in an accident?)

Easiest answer ever. Yes. Sanji would take all the blame upon himself regardless of it really was his fault or not. Even if he wasn’t present at the time of the accident, he’d still blame himself and say it was his fault for not being there for you or being prepared for anything. He’d never forgive himself.

B-Break up (How would they break up with you?)

It’s impossible to even imagine this man breaking up with you, ever. Seriously. He’s so passionate, and once he’s in love, he’s in love. There is no going back. BUT, I suppose, on the outrageously slim chance that he did break up with you, he would do it in the kindest way. You wouldn’t even realize you’ve been broken up with.

C-Crying (how would they make you cry?)

If he were to make you cry, it would be entirely accidental. In fact, even then I can only picture Sanji making you cry tears of happiness. If he were to be the cause of your tears (one’s that aren’t tears of joy) he would beat himself up. He can’t stand seeing those he loves cry or upset in any manner.

D-Death (how would they react to your death?)

Denial would be the first emotion he expresses. It’s not possible, right? You can’t be dead. You’re not dead… because if you really were dead, it means he’s lost the light of his life. He’d be practically inconsolable for a very long time. Nothing would be able to bring back his usual liveliness. Cooking loses its appeal – I mean there’s no point if you won’t be the one enjoying his food. The Straw Hats are unable to do anything to bring back some of that fire. They get so desperate that Zoro even intentionally tries to cause a ruckus, but Sanji doesn’t react at all.

E-Emotion (what is one emotion they would try to hide the most and how would they do it?)

His insecurities are the one thing he would never dear show to others. Not only would it result in endless remarks from Zoro, but, he doesn’t want to have to deal with the pitiful comments – ‘you’re not useless’, ‘you are wanted and needed here’, ‘we all love you’. Sure, he understands people are just trying to help and be reassuring but it just makes him feel worse. So, instead Sanji deals with this the only way he knows how: bottling it all up and putting on a façade.

F-Fight (do you two ever fight? How big are the fights? What do you fight about? Etc.)

Fighting with you is something he hates doing. He never allows anything to get to that point. Sanji can’t risk losing you over a fight (no matter how big or small). Instead, he will apologize immediately, completely agreeing with everything you are saying. However, if it’s something he feels really strongly about (i.e your safety) he will sit you down and communicate calmly.

G-Guilt (what is the biggest thing they feel guilty about?)

The events of Whole Cake Island continue to eat him up. He knows he did it for the sake of the crew and the safety of the Baratie, but Sanji can’t seem to forget the way he disrespected his captain and hurt the people he loved the most (and the one’s that loved him too). The part that really makes him messes with him is that fact that Luffy forgave him instantly. To be honest, he wasn’t expecting Luffy to stay mad or hold a grudge, because well… that’s just not what he does. Even so, Sanji’s conscience is constantly telling him that he doesn’t deserve to be on the future pirate kings crew despite apologizing and being forgiven.

H-Heartbreak (what would cause them pain in the relationship? How would they deal during a break-up?)

Being away from you for long periods of time is one of the biggest causes of pain in the relationship for Sanji. He misses you like crazy and often finds himself distracted while thinking of you.

During the early stages of a break-up Sanji is likely to be a bit more reserved, choosing to keep to himself a little more. His usual enthusiasm lacks a little bit of oomph. Sometimes, late at night, when everyone else is asleep, he makes his way to the kitchen where he sits in the dark, cigarette in hand and quietly cries to himself.

I-Injured (how would they react if you are badly injured?)

He would be FURIOUS. Not at you of course. At whoever the hell thought it was okay to hurt the love of his life. He would be in god mode and rampage to find the son of a bitch that would ever dear to lay a hand on his partner.

J-Jealousy (what do they do if they are jealous?)

Death glares are a staple in the Sanji jealousy inventory. He’ll glare at anyone who seems to be taking too much of your attention. He also becomes a lot more clingy, using any and every excuse possible to be near you at all times. It can become a bit much at times, so if you tell him to reign it in a little, he’ll try his best.

There is one person that he refuses to let you spend any time with. Unsurprisingly, that is Zoro. He gets extremely jealous if you pay even the most minimal amount of attention to Zoro mumbling lots of “Stupid mosshead, why the hell are you spending time with him anyway?”

K-Kill (would they kill for revenge?)

Something deep inside me wants to say yes. But, he is far too kind-hearted to take away someone’s life. It is a possibility though, if the other person was to kill his s/o, or anyone else on the crew. However, for the most part, Sanji would just beat the person/people black and blue until they can’t walk, talk, or eat anymore. Basically, he won’t kill them, but they would wish they were dead after he’s finished with them.

L-Loss (what is their greatest loss?)

When he was a child, he lost his mother. She was the only person in his family that truly loved and cared for him (okay his sister did too, to an extent). His mother believed in his dreams and passions. She treated Sanji like a true human being. Losing her was devasting and made him feel more alone than he had ever felt before.

M-Mistake (what is the worst mistake they ever made with you?)

It’s very rare for Sanji to ever make any kind of mistake with you. He remembers every date, anniversary, achievement and milestone regardless of its importance. He doesn’t speak rudely to you, lash out at you or direct any sort of violence towards you.

So, the worst thing he’s probably done is accuse you of liking Zoro more than you liked him, because you would train and workout with him. It wasn’t that it was a serious or harsh accusation, it was just that this was a conversation the two of you have had time and time again.

N-Nightmares (how often do they have them? What are they about? How do they deal with it?

Sanji occasionally finds himself waking up in a sweat, breathing heavily. He doesn’t have nightmares too often, but when he does, they are horrifyingly vivid. It’s as if he is a starving boy again fighting for his life. OR it’s as if he’s that lonely good-for-nothing screw up of a child, locked away in a cell. It’s frightening just how realistic these nightmares feel and to bring himself back to reality all he does is find you. He needs to hold you, look at you, smell your scent, hear your quiet snores… anything. You are his safe place, a sign that everything is alright.

O-Outrage (how and why would they get mad at you?)

He wouldn’t get mad at you. It’s extremely unlikely (though not impossible). The only possible instances that could happen is if you were to disrespect his passion and talent for food. But lets be real… why on earth would you even do that in the first place.

P-Past (what has happened in your relationship that changed the way you saw each other?)

Whole Cake Island was a real game changer. So much was revealed about Sanji that he never wanted anyone to know. He was terrified you would think differently of him knowing that he was a ‘failure’ (note: you didn’t think of him differently at all). However, the part that really put a strain on your relationship was how you thought he had betrayed not only yourself, but the crew too. It really was a whole rollercoaster of emotions, but in the end the two of you were able to work through it, coming out stronger.

Q-Quality (what is their most dangerous/toxic quality?)

This man is quick to anger. Even though his reactions are usually harmless, what’s to stop him from one day completely just blowing up and doing, or saying, something to hurt those he cares about.

R-Rejection (how would they react to you rejecting their confession (or the other way around))

Of course, he would be upset if you rejected his confession, because a beautiful individual has just turned him down, but honestly, he’d just continue treating you as he always. has

S-Scars (battle or self-inflicted)

There are definitely no scars - battle-related or self-inflicted - on his body (that we know of). However, mental scars are a different story. He has plenty of those from his childhood, as do a large proportion of one piece characters.

T-Trust (have they ever broken your trust?)

Never in his life would Sanji do something to break your trust. The closest it came was the incident on Zou and Whole Cake Island, it certainly looked as if he had betrayed you and broken your trust entirely, only for you to find out it was the complete opposite.

Many people think Sanji is the type of individual to cheat in a relationship. While I can see where they are coming from with this opinion, I strongly disagree. This may be an unpopular opinion, I’m not too sure, but, Sanji would never be disloyal in a relationship. Treating women properly is such a big part of his personality to the point where it is practically embedded into his muscle memory – he acts on instinct. So of course there will be times where he’s paying a little extra attention to some lady but there is no ulterior meaning to his actions – its simply his firm belief that all women deserve to be treated and doted on as the queens they are. Additionally, during the Dressrosa arc Sanji truly believed he was in a ‘relationship’ with Viola and as soon as he knew that he was trying his absolute hardest to pay attention to Viola and only Viola. His mind did wonder off to Nami and Robin but he would scold himself for that (and feel free to correct me on this if im remembering incorrectly – it’s honestly quite possible that I’ve made this up entirely LMAO it’s been a while since I’ve read and watched the dressrosa arc).

So, let me sum up again: No. Sanji has never done anything that has broken your trust.

(my apologies I really went off for a second there I’m SO sorry).

U-Urge (how badly do they want to see you after you guys separated?)

Oh boy, he’s practically incapable of going five minutes without seeing you. He misses you so much it’s crazy. Your presence is so soothing for him, so he gets really antsy and anxious in your absence.

V-Vicious (what do they do when they lash out on you?)

I seriously can’t see him lashing out at you at all. He would never physically lash out at you but, there may possibly be potential for him to say something harsh in the heat of the moment. It literally wouldn’t even be because of anything you’d done in particular. It’d just be a build-up of things and then you happen to be the closest person and the next person to say something, and it tips him over the edge, so he snaps. He apologizes as soon as the words leave his mouth.

W-Weak (what makes them feel weak how do they try to avoid it?)

Sanji hates, and I mean hates being unable to help those that he cares about. It’s one of the few things that makes him feel weak. He has a kind heart and is always wanting to protect those he loves, so he does everything in his power to be ready to move in an instant. He remains aware of his surroundings, and is always on guard so that he can defend and strike when the situation calls for it.

X-X-ray (what do they hate and show it most obviously?)

The most obvious object of Sanji’s hatred is Zoro, however, I wouldn’t say it’s hatred. It’s a classic rivalry that is thankfully not rooted in any true ill will.

One other thing Sanji has absolutely no tolerance for is the inappropriate or rude treatment towards women, and food. On many occasions Sanji has actually physically and verbally fought others over their treatment of women and food.

Y-Yearn (what is one thing that they want but can’t have?)

I know this is meant to be serious and super angsty but, my mind automatically went to the clear-clear devil fruit LMAO. Its canon that the clear-clear fruit is something Sanji wants but can’t have because it’s currently in use by another person. (to make up for this not angsty idea I’ll do another one).

Growing up all Sanji ever wanted was a family that loves him and treats him kindly. Sure, he had his mother (before she passed away), and to an extent he had his sister, but he never truly experienced a loving family growing up. However, the moment he met Zeff & the Baratie gang and then the Straw Hat Pirates he learnt something important: Family isn’t always blood.

Z-Zero (what do they do/say in your dying moments?)

He tears up. A lot. He’s so conflicted between wanting to spend your final moments with you but also not being able to handle that pain. Ultimately, he decides to endure, holding your hand tightly and whispering everything he’s ever wanted to say - all his dreams about your future together and how he saw that playing out etc.

[equalstrashflavoredtrash]

Echoy’aim - 1

a/n: so my hope is for this to be a series, im like really diggin the ideas i’ve got rolling around in my skull and i also wanna take it slow with this fic (I know i have a habit of rushing to the horny bits) While writing i listened to the album Ecophony Rinne by Geinoh Yamashirogumi, which i would totally recommend! it helped me with the vibe. also much love to @maybege​ and @whenimaunicorn�� for listening to me ramble and encouring this mess.

wordcount: 2,669 (lol nice)

warnings: this fic is Omegaverse, with a/b/o dynamics, later points in the story will be more smutty but so far nothing sexual happens

PART 2

alpha!Paz x reader // The Mandalorian (A/B/O)

Looking up at the sky, you couldn’t help but notice how bright the new moon was. Even when the moon Wolo was cast in the shadow of Otare, the artificial light pollution from the city of Odharra on its surface was always visible, always glowing. You couldn’t look at the moon without wondering what your family was doing. It was hard to keep track of the time difference between the celestial bodies but you knew that your mom was most likely in her lab working away.

“You also running late?” a voice from behind you asked. With a simple shake of your head you broke the course of your thoughts before turning to find Kel. She wore her commonplace smile, exuding a confidence you were jealous of; she seemed so content and happy with her state, resting her hand on top of her round belly.

“Yeah, just lost track of time,” you mumbled, falling in pace next to her as she waddled along the main path to the center of the village. 

“Same here, it took forever to get Boej down for the night. I was so worn out I crashed next to him,” She laughed to herself, moving her hand to brace against her lower back. Without hesitation you stilled, giving her a moment to rest before she continued, “Do you know what this urgent council meeting is about anyway?”

“Apparently there was a distress call from just outside the atmosphere, and some families want to respond,” You mumbled with a shrug, relaying the sparse details you had overheard. The pair of you walked along in a shared silence that wasn’t exactly uncomfortable, but you still felt the need to fill the air. “Well, the shipment is arriving tomorrow. Jae will be back with you in no time.”

Kel nodded at your comment, smiling to herself before adding, “He’ll be back and staying on planet until these two are born.” 

“I'm sure it’s hard for him to be away from his riduur, especially when you’re so far along.” You tried to ignore the ache in your chest as you watched her rub along the curve of her pregnant belly. It was the same ache you felt when she announced her first son, or when she confided in you before anyone else when she learned was having twins. The pheromones a pregnant omega gave off were supposed to calming in nature to those around them, but the smell of her did not seem to have that effect on you. You wanted to be happy for her, as much as the whole tribe was—it seemed everyone wanted to touch and feel the kicks of her budding children—but you couldn’t help feeling outside of the events as the older omegas reminisced on their pregnancies and offered advice for Kel’s comfort.

Kel’s expression softened as she took in the way you gazed at her body. Wrapping her arm around your shoulders, she pulled you close, giving a squeeze as she nudged her forehead against yours, “Don’t worry, you’ll find a mate soon. I'm sure of it.” 

You tried to smile and seem agreeable, but also took the opportunity of approaching the Greathouse as a chance to break apart. Kel waved as she went in through the main door while you slipped around the corner of the building. Quietly as you could, you used a side entrance to cut to your seat near the center without disturbing too many of the onlookers. You settled on your knees in your place, just behind your grandmother. 

The Greathouse was as full as you’d ever seen it, members of the tribe packed in from wall to wall, standing where there wasn’t room to sit; all witnessing the elders’ discussion. Spectators were never uncommon for these meetings, but you couldn’t think of a time you’d seen this many at once. 

The seating arrangement in the great space during meetings was in the shape of a wagon wheel. In the center of the hall—at the wheel’s axle—was the fire pit. Circled around that were the eldest alpha of each family. Six in all, a mix of men and women, each with their helmets—an important heirloom and family symbol—proudly displayed before them. Behind the alphas sat their families, spread out to fill the slices of space like the spokes of a wheel. The circle of elders was broken only by your grandmother, the Alor and seventh member of the council. She was the only one without a helmet as she was the only omega. Across the room you could see Kel settle down among her family as a cousin offered her his chair.

You tried to quietly whisper an apology for your tardiness but your grandmother waved you off, patting your leg with one hand. In the other she held a small leather pouch. The discussion was in full swing now but you focused more on reaching for the steaming kettle by the fire than what was being said at the moment. You refilled your grandmother’s mug before pouring a drink for yourself.

“They are Mandalorians!” One of the leader’s voices boomed from across the circle.

“They are warriors!” Another replied, slamming her balled fist on the ground to emphasize her point. “We are farmers, we have chosen peace—all of us have!—there is no place for warriors among us.” 

The people watching were nearly silent—only occasionally clapping in agreement—rapt with attention as the group of six continued to make their points over the crackling of the fire and each other. You tried to listen to the arguing, weighing their opinions in your own mind, but your eyes kept wandering to your grandmother’s hands. 

Idly, she took a sip of her tea, unbothered by the noise, all while continuing to rhythmically bounce the pouch in her grasp. You could almost hear the familiar muffled sounds of the contents being jostled by the movement, the way they clack against each other. 

“This bickering will get us nowhere!” The man seated to your grandmother’s right rang out. It was Vres, your eldest Uncle, and the head of your own family. “Please, Alor,” he said in a calmer voice now that the arguing had halted, turning to face his mother, “Tell us, what do the bones say?”

All eyes were on your grandmother—necks craning forward to get a clearer view while those in the back stood from their seats—all watching as she twisted her wrist, pouring the fragments of bone from the pouch. The small white pieces, edges smoothed and rounded by age, bounced and scattered about, settling in place upon the ground before her, seemingly at random—but you watched the way her finger guided along above the arrangement. Studying each one in time, taking in their relation to each other. You tried to recall your lessons and understand what she was reading.

“The bones speak of the echoy’aim,” she finally said, breaking the heavy silence that had settled over the audience, “They speak of the deep pain we all know.” Carefully she reached forward, gently picking up one bone with her bent, arthritic fingers, holding it up to the light of the flame. This one you recognized. 

‘Both possibilities and aliit, our family,’ your grandmother had explained when she’d decided it was time for you to learn and had first shown you the bones. ‘It breaks off in two directions, representing the parting of ways or the branching of generations; what matters is how you read it.’ 

“They remind us that when one brother is safe, we all are safe.” 

- .-- --- --- .-- ..- ...-

There wasn't much contest after your grandmother spoke. The vote was unanimous—begrudgingly so by some—that the soldiers would stay with the tribe. The matter of whether they would truly integrate with Cuun Adate, or move on after a briefer respite, was left open to future discussion.

The covert arrived late at night, eager to land after an arduous journey. Most of Cuun Yaim was asleep when their ships first touched ground. You were awake in the loft of the Greathouse at the time, having said that you were going to bed but then losing track of time reading on your holopad.

It was lonely in the loft now. You missed the nights with the other omegas. When you moved from your parent’s home to the loft, the other beds were taken, since all of the other omegas had come of age before you even arrived in Cuun Yaim. You had ended up sleeping next to Kel, spending most of those nights together talking until you fell asleep; discussing the possibilities of the future as a full member of the tribe with a loving riduur.

Now, most nights you spent your time alone in the loft, bundled up with all the extra, unused pillows from the other beds. The loft was reserved for young omegas without a mate. It was over the main entrance of the great space, looking down over the central fire pit. It got very warm and cozy on cold nights, especially after gatherings that filled the hall with people like tonight’s meeting. 

At the far end of the hall was the Alor's residence, where your grandmother lived. Your Uncle and his family currently stayed there too, helping to care for her in her old age after she minded and taught their younglings during the day. 

After the last riduurok—when it was apparent that you would be the only one left un-mated and alone in the loft—your grandmother offered for you to sleep downstairs but you refused, insisting you wanted your own space and that the warm loft would be nice in the coming cold months.

So now you spent your evenings alone, reading your holopad as you listened to the dying fire below and the muffled sounds of your uncle’s riduur singing their pups to sleep.

This night was different due to the expected arrivals. You could hear your grandmother still awake working away at her weaving and humming along—the wooden clacking of the loom keeping time—far past when she would normally turn in. 

Your eyelids were heavy, the text before you becoming blurry as your wrist started to slump, almost dropping the holopad when you were jolted awake by the creak of the large door opening.

Cautiously crawling across the wooden planks on your knees, you listened closely, trying to count the footsteps before you could see how many people had entered. You were so focused that you hadn't noticed that the clack-clack of your grandmother's loom had stopped.

Shuffling on your belly, you approached the edge of the loft. Carefully you eased forward, peering over the sawed ends of the boards to watch what was happening around the fire. Your grandmother was plain to see in her usual seat but you followed her line of vision and spotted the newcomers entering the hall. 

The pair were easy to identify as Mandalorian; the first wore a golden beskar helmet that bore a series of small horns that circled around the crown of their head—almost Zobrak-like in their arrangement. A helmet that was not removed despite entering the great hall, something you chalked up to them being uneasy in a new place. Still, they knelt when approaching the fire, showing deference to your kin. That was when you noticed the second visitor. You could smell him before you even looked his way. His scent commanded your attention instantly—his pheromones, both musky and masculine in essence, held your gaze on him though you wanted to hear what the other was saying to your grandmother. Still you forced yourself to pay attention.

The one in the horned helmet stepped forward, urging your grandmother to stay seated. Reaching forward your grandmother clasped their forearm, a greeting you recognized as one shared between friends or equals. 

"I apologize for our untimely arrival, but I'm sure you understand the urgent nature of our situation. Thank you again, for taking my people in on such short notice." Hearing the second Alor's voice you recognized she was a woman and wondered vaguely curious of her disposition and what their covert's traditions were. 

Normally it was easy to tell by scent who was an alpha or omega, but the smell of the silent soldier was so overpowering to you, every other scent in the room was dampened compared to him—even the smell of the wood smoke. It was hard to discern much about his appearance from above but he stood tall, clad in blue armor. He seemed intimidating in stature, even without the protective layer of beskar you could tell he would tower over you. 

He remained silent as the two Alors spoke, standing near the fire to warm while listening to the conversation. You felt almost mesmerised as you studied him, unable to tear your eyes away a second time. It was like watching the alphas in the village spar: paying close attention at  every moment so you don’t miss the winning blow—but now instead of hoping to see a hard right hook you would have been content just seeing his fingers idly twitch.

You thought he was engrossed in the Alors' conversation when his helmet abruptly turned, almost instantly focusing on you. Even though his entire face was obscured by the dark tint of his helmet's visor, you could feel his eyes landing on you tucked away in the shadowy eaves of the Greathouse.

He held your gaze so intently you found yourself loathe to break the connection, even though normally you would look away from such direct eye contact. He was a proud alpha—you could not only by how he held himself, but by the heady scent of his disposition swirling up with the wood smoke to find you in the loft. 

There was something warm about the smell you couldn't name. Breathing it in, you felt not quite drowsy, but content. Lulled by his infatuating scent, you tucked your arms in close and rested your cheek on your wrist—all the while continuing to keep gaze with the blue soldier.

Your grandmother waved away the other Alor's apologies with her usual air. "You are safe, that is what matters most." She leaned forward, using the end of her cane to poke at the crumbling embers that were the last log. "You must be tired, please rest here."

"It is too late. The others will sleep on the ship tonight, so as not to disturb the village, but Paz and I will gladly accept your offer." Holding out a gloved hand she gestured to her silent companion as your grandmother hummed in agreement.

"Very well, then I must turn in." Your grandmother declared as she braced her cane, moving to stand. You could feel your muscles twitch with the impulse to help her, even though you were watching from the shadows. Instead of yourself stepping forward, it was the blue soldier.

He circled around the fire in barely two long steps, reaching for her elbow before she could dismiss his aid as she normally would. He walked slowly, keeping her pace as she shuffled along to the door that led to her living space. 

"I had my son-in-law set out some blankets for you, I hope there is all you need," your grandmother commented, turning around to speak to him.

"All that you provide is more than plenty, and I am thankful for it." His response was simple enough—the proper manners for speaking to an Alor—and your grandmother approved, smiling as she ducked past the curtain that separated the living quarters from the great space. The sound of his voice sent a pang through you, something that echoed in your form before settling as a warm heat between your thighs.

Returning to your bed, you climbed under the covers, basking in his scent as it continued to waft up to you as the blue soldier rested below your rafters. Unable to deny your biology, you were easily lulled into a comfortable sleep—resting more easily than you had since the loft had become so empty. 

/// NEXT >> //

Glossary [literal definition](functional definition) Echoy’aim - [searching/mourning + home](the Mandalorian Diaspora) Cuun Adate - [my people](the name of the Tribe) Cuun Yaim - [my home](the name of the Village) Otare - The planet Cuun Yaim is on Wolo - The Moon of Otare Odharra - The largest city on Wolo Riduur - Spouse (mate) Riduurok - a bond of love, marriage

///

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Things about Black Widow that I loved

ofc spoilers

(I loved every single minute of this movie, but these are the things that i stuck out more for me)

The god damn opening scenes. I got chills, the music made it even more perfect.

Nat deceiving Ross, I love when Marvel shows Nat’s high intelligence. We didn’t get much of that before so i love to see it through the movie.

Yelena going down the wall in Morocco (it might be stupid, but i just love that part)

O. T. Fagbenle

“Fanny longbotom? what are you 12?”

“Budapest.. ssshht”

Nat citing the movie in real time 😭

The bridge fight was also amazing, specially when she took the shield i died.

The extra sibling fight. (i don’t have a sibling but if i had one that’s how i would fight them lmaooo)

Nat and Yelena sliding on the rooftop (as well the nameless widow)

Nat trying to save the nameless widow on that tower :(

“сука”

“You want me to chase him down and un-steal it?”

Nat and Yelena sliding down the thing in the subterranean train. i don’t know, but for me that was so cool.

“Great plan, i love the part where i almost bleed to death”

Clint in the vent lmaoooo

Yelena talking about her amazing vest and Nat just listening to her with a smile 😭

Nat and Yelena ganging up on O.T. Fagbenle (bro he didn’t have a name or i just forgot it???)

Yelena eating that bar and going “is dry, really dry” while O.T. looks worried lmao

“You are a very annoying individual” i don’t know, i just love that sooo much.

“You are such a poser”

Nat and Yelena bickering while saving Alexei.

“We are both doing a great job 👍😀”

Yelena casually causing an avalanche and going “this is a cool way to die”

Nat saving Alexei from the avalanche.

The whole joke about the uterus and the fallopian tubes. (it’s their pain so they got to joke about it)

The hug and Nat acting like every elder daughter while Yelena gives in but seconds later she goes “No, let go of me, you smell really bad” (She wanted the hug, but not the smell 😞😂)

Alexei one sided rivalry with Captain America kills me lmaoooo I wonder if he knows about Bucky lol

Melina and her pigs and her mind control thing (not saying it was good, but it was a great twist to know that yelena’s pain was in part thanks to her)

The four of them siting at the table in the same way they did all those years showing us that they are still bonded to those days. Also, the similarity in the set killed me.

Alexei and Yelena singing “Bye, Bye Miss American Pie”

The widow training in sync. While is bad bc of mind control, i think it also cool having all these women being badass in sync.

I’m sorry but i can’t help but love taskmaster and the way she can mimic very well every avenger. Specially T’Challa (listen i cried when i saw that, i was actually expecting the wakanda soundtrack to pop out. it hurts)

Nat using the same tactics she used on Loki and Dreykov hitting her while she doesn’t have a defense. That showcase abuse from men into women.

Nat breaking her nose and then putting it back again?? girl i’m her and i faint lmaoo

Melina’s intelligence while fighting is still perfect for me. She choosing the smarter way all the time.

Yelena doing Nat pose and then going “disgusting” 😂

Also Yelena on the operation table going “This is a less cooler way to die” (i mean she is not wrong, imagine if the open your head to meddle with your brain, ugggh)

The fact that Nat took out her batons to fight a bunch of widow while she knew she didn’t stand a chance. (Steve getting ready to fight Thanos army :(((( ALONE, best friends shit)

Yelena and Nat bickering until the final moment. When she went to Nat “I take it out in 3” and she just takes it out without counting and Nat looks at her like “Bitch???”

Nat letting Antonia out?? even tho she knew she was gonna try to kill her? amazing

Yelena sacrificing yourself

But Nat won’t let her die so easily so ofc she jumps in a perfect form to save her little sister.

Then Nat let’s go to go for Antonia. (GIRL STOP BEING SO CONFIDENT WHILE FIGHTING)

Yelena “we are both upside down) and their hug.

Alexei recognising that he have been screwing up everything until the last moment so in the end he opts for take Nat hand and shut up.

Yelena giving Nat the vest, let me cry, let me cry 😭

The whistle LET ME CRY, LET ME CRY.

the widows coming back for Yelena and Antonia 😭😭😭

The ending while Nat drives away and the Avengers music plays 😭😭😭😭😭😭

“Let’s go Fanny”

Yelena in her own amazing style, showcasing that she finally gets to make her own decisions 😭

The whistle and the tomb (and me waiting for a whistle back 😭😭)

KILL HIM.

Also while i know that this maybe have nothing to do i will like to think that it has a lot to do.

When Alexei was giving the speech and saying “You should only sacrifice yourself for something...” probably “bigger” or “important”

I like to think that Yelena heard that so she did the sacrifice.

At the same time I like to think that Nat also heard about it, that maybe he told her in the end so she kept that in mind in “Endgame”

It could be only Marvel fucking around, but i like to think that they both heard Alexei’s speech.

Anyways, i’m gonna go cry now.

[nowoyas]

This is Home (NSFW)

A/N: Title references the song This is Home by Cavetown, which you can’t tell me isn’t an entire trans mood. Give it a listen, y’all. It’s one of my faves <3

This fic is part of @birds-have-teeth​‘s Izumonth collab to celebrate Izuku’s birth month. For the lineup, head over here!

(izuku with binder edit and overall banner both made by me)

Summary: When your boyfriend starts distancing himself not long into your relationship, you decide to confront him and remind him just how loved he is. (trans!Izuku x reader)

Notes: Izuku is a pre-op, pre-T trans man for this fic. Reader is implied to be a cis girl. I am trans. In this fic, I am writing Izuku experiencing something I have and do struggle with and I swear to god if anyone clowns in my inbox because I wrote this I will literally fling them out the window, killing them instantly. Not on this one, assholes.

Warnings: smut, oral (reader giving), gender dysphoria, smut smut smut, I cried but you might not

Word count: 5555 (sexy)

Izuku has been avoiding you.

It's not obvious, not at first. Your honestly wonderful boyfriend is more than happy to text you good morning and good night as always, even on the nights where he goes to sleep at 4AM, and it's not as though the amount of cute emoji following the texts has changed. He still eats breakfast with you after his (very early) morning run, still eats lunch with you and your combined friend group, still eats dinner with you whenever he doesn't forget to eat. (You're working on getting him to remember to eat at all the right times.) 

But one-on-one study sessions get cancelled. He now trains seemingly whenever you can't, even though you used to train together all the time. It's all the small things, like how he used to kiss you suddenly all the time whenever it was just the two of you, but now, you're hardly ever alone together often enough even if he still did. And maybe you're imagining it, but the usual sleep and wake texts are less enthusiastic than before. 

You want to believe that maybe the two of you are just progressing from the honeymoon stage of your relationship, but this doesn't feel like progress. 

This feels like distance. 

This feels like he’s afraid to be alone with you.

You don't want to pry, but something's up with him, and you've got an inkling of exactly what. One thing's for certain, though—you're not letting him go another day thinking he can't talk to you about it. Knowing him, no matter what the issue is, he's convinced himself it would bother you for him to ask for reassurance or something to that effect.

And so, perhaps a bit shamelessly, you corner him.

Well, not physically. You're not that mean.

But when you knock on his door when you know he's there alone and he answers, you don't give him a chance to brush you off. You shove your way right into his room and take a seat on the edge of his bed.

"Talk," you demand, crossing your arms as he flusters and shuts the door behind him.

"[n-name], is something wrong—"

"Talk," you repeat, leveling a glare at him. "You've been acting weird around me lately. If it's something you're not comfortable talking about, that's okay, but if I've done something to make you avoid me, I want to talk about it and figure out how to fix it."

Izuku flinches, taking an awkward seat on his bed. (The other end of his bed. You try not to let show just how much that stings.)

"Y-you haven't done anything wrong," he forces out evenly, not looking at you. "I swear."

You shift closer to him, placing a hand over his own. "Izuku, look at me."

Green eyes meet yours. There's guilt there, and an underlying fear with a source you can only guess at.

"I love you, babe. I want to help you. You don't have to let me, but I really—fuck—" You sniff, pulling back to wipe at your eyes before you let any tears fall. "—shit, sorry. I just... I'm worried about you, and I don't want to lose you, y'know?"

He panics, crossing the distance between you within moments to pull you into a tight hug. His hand winds into your hair, the other settling in the small of your back and rubbing soothingly as he shushes you. "No, oh my god, angel, I-I never meant to make you think you did anything wrong. Really, it's not you, it's me!"

Your blood turns to ice in an instant at his words. "T-that's the kind of shit people say when they're explaining why they're breaking up with you, Izuku."

"N-no! That's not—That's not what this is. I love you too, I love you so much, I just... I'm scared, okay?" he admits, face pressed into your neck.

"Scared?"

He nods, hugging you just a smidge tighter. "Yeah. Scared."

"Of what, handsome?" You finally relax into his hold, snuggling into his shoulder with a sigh as you try to rein in the tears.

"It's probably stupid, and it doesn't really matter that much."

"Izuku babe."

"Yes?"

"Did it make you feel something?"

He hesitates before nodding slowly.

"Then it's not stupid, and it matters to me."

Izuku shudders in your arms, mumbling something you don't quite catch.

"I'm sorry, what was that?"

He shifts, repeating himself just loud enough to be heard. "I wanna go further with you but I hate my body and don't want to take my clothes off to do it," he says, speaking so quickly you almost miss it a second time.

You freeze, a light blush on your cheeks. It's true that you've not gone that far with Izuku—he always seemed content just to kiss and cuddle and exchange sweet words behind closed doors, and god, you were happy just to have him in any capacity. Unfortunately—or perhaps fortunately—there's bigger problems at hand than "your cute boyfriend wants to fuck you". 

"Oh, Izu," you breathe. "You know you don't have to push yourself, baby. It's okay if you're uncomfortable with—"

"B-but I shouldn't be!" he insists, wriggling away to look into your eyes with a pained look. "I don't wanna be uncomfortable. Not with you. I just... don't know how to... how to not be, and I didn't want things to escalate if I got alone with you because then I'd probably panic and push you away and then you'd probably feel hurt a-and it'd be my fault so I was avoiding you so I couldn’t hurt you before I was ready and then–"

"Izuku," you say firmly. "Don't push yourself for my sake. I'd feel awful knowing you did something like that for me. It's okay if we just kiss. It's okay if we never kiss. What's not okay is you forcing yourself into a dysphoric breakdown because you wanted to please me. If we fuck, I want it to be something we both enjoy, and I can't enjoy it if it's upsetting you or making you uncomfortable."

He tears up, yanking you back into a hug. "I'm s-sorry, [name]."

You laugh, tangling your hands in his curls and gently working knots out with your fingers. "You don't need to apologize, baby. I love you. And you know..."

"Mm?"

You smirk, looping a curl around one finger. Perhaps deliberately, your voice drops into a seductive, teasing voice. "If your biggest problem is either of us seeing your body, there's a few solutions. No one said you had to take your clothes off when we fuck, handsome."

He squeaks, and you swear you can feel his face heating up in your shoulder when he whines. He doesn't protest, so you continue, a grin spreading across your face.

"If you don't want me seeing you, you can always blindfold me," you offer, "or we could turn the lights off, or if you don't want to have to see yourself, I could blindfold you..."

"[N-name]!" Izuku yelps, burying his face into your chest to hide. "Stoooop, oh my god–"

Laughter bubbles from your throat. "Sorry, sorry. But those were honest suggestions. If you really wanna mess around with me a bit, I'm happy to let you set the pace. We kiss as much as you want, however heavy you want... Hell, I might even be into it if you order me around a little. Who knows?"

"O-order you?" You don't have to see him to know how red his face is—you can almost feel it through your top, the rush of embarrassment displayed on his freckled cheeks.

"Mhmm. I won't do anything you aren’t explicitly okay with. And the moment you want to stop, you tell me as much, and we can stop. But you know, I'm in love with you no matter what, and that includes your wonderfully strong body and your cute, handsome face. You light up any room you enter and make me want to work hard for my future. It’s not about your body. The fact that you're hot is a bonus, not the selling point."

He sniffles gently. You carefully go back to working through his hair. "But again, no matter how you want this to go, I'm okay with it. Your comfort first, baby."

He pulls out of the hug, worrying his lip between his teeth as he watches you. "If you're really okay with it, then... i-is it okay if I just kiss you, and we feel it out from there?"

You smile softly. "Go ahead, handsome."

Despite all the kisses you've shared before, every new kiss between you is charged with affection. Izuku can't help it if he melts into every kiss you share—your lips are so soft and you smell so nice and he loves you so much! Before he knows it, he's smoothing a palm against the back of your neck and deepening the kiss, moving his lips hesitantly against your own. He parts just enough to murmur against your lips: "I love you" and "tell me if you want me to stop" and "you can touch my arms if you want". (He knows you do. You only confirm it when your fingertips immediately drag along his upper arms, appreciating the muscles there.)

Before he knows it, he's swiping his tongue against your bottom lip tentatively and pulling you into his lap. You've been more than charitable—your hands remain carefully on his arms, your tongue in your own mouth even as he explores yours. You really won't go a step further than he asks for, and his heart swells at the confirmation. When he breaks the kiss, both of you are breathing heavy, a fact which draws extra attention to the fact that he's still wearing his chest binder.

"I-I want to kiss your neck. I-it's okay if you touch me, j-just please not my chest o-or my... Um, you know."

You mock-salute, a comically serious look on your face that clashes with your flushed cheeks. "Yes, sir! No chest, no ass, no between-thighs!"

The smile that pulls at his lips is utterly love-drunk as he leans back in, first pressing a soft kiss to the corner of your lips and trailing tiny pecks along your jawline. When he reaches your neck, he hesitates, and you wait to slide your arms over his shoulders. "Hun?" you say gently. "Still good?"

Green eyes flick up to yours, intense but wavering. "Y-yeah. I can do this."

Without any other warning, he places a hot, open-mouthed kiss directly onto your pulse, drawing a gasp from you when his teeth graze you just enough for you to feel it. Your hands slide down his back to find purchase as he continues, switching between peppering light kisses to your neck and honestly, doing pretty much anything that won't leave a mark.

Meantime, it's all you can do to gasp and whimper as he finds all your soft spots and goes on the full attack, and his hands roam your sides, climbing up until you're sure he's going to grope you–

And then he flinches and pulls back, just slightly. There's a quiet hiss through his teeth at the movement.

You'd love to whine at the loss, and normally, you probably would. But this is Izuku, and if you're going to let him set the pace, you're damn well going to let him set the pace.

You remove your hands from him completely, watching him with concerned eyes. "Everything alright?"

His heart twists at how gentle and concerned you are. One moment, you're huffing and looking at him with nothing but lust as he kisses your neck, the next, your brow's furrowed as you search him for any signs of fear or panic. 

He really doesn't deserve you.

"Do you want to stop?" you ask, voice soft in the way he's seen you use to talk to frightened animals.

He shakes his head, flattening a palm against his chest. "Sorry, sorry. M-my chest is just hurting a little."

"How long have you been binding today?" you ask without missing a beat.

A hand comes up to rub the back of his neck. "I, uh, I took it off during Hero Basic earlier..."

"And had it on all day before?" you ask, hands on your hips. "And all day since then?"

He nods sheepishly, refusing to meet your eyes. 

"Izuku..." You sigh. "I said I wanted you to be comfortable, but I also want you to be safe. Please take your binder off? I can look away while you do, I just don't want you to hurt yourself."

"I..." Izuku sighs, twiddling his thumbs nervously. "A-actually, could you, um..."

"I can leave the room if it'd make you feel better," you offer.

"N-no! That's not what I meant." He wraps his arms around your waist, refusing to let you leave. "I-I, um, wanted to try..." His face is beet red, and in a panic, he buries his face in your chest to hide his embarrassment. "C-can you help me out of it?" he finally squeaks out.

"Oh, Izu. Of course I can help you." You gently maneuver his face away from your chest, carefully reaching up to work at his tie. "Let me know the second you want me to stop, okay?"

He nods, squeezing his eyes shut. "Okay."

"Would it help if I kissed you while I get your top off?"

After a long moment, he nods, hiding his blushing face in his hands. His hands stay there until you gently pull them away with a soft giggle. "I can't kiss you if you're hiding your perfect face, handsome."

He gives you a wobbly smile, and you pull him towards you with a gentle tug at his tie. You're careful not to push too far as you kiss him—soft, open-mouthed kisses that have him whining as you try furiously to get this damn knot untied. How'd he even manage to get it like this? 

Nevertheless, eventually you do manage to get the knot undone and start working carefully on the buttons of his school shirt. Once you're halfway down, you pull back to murmur a soft "are we still okay?" against his lips.

He responds by crashing his lips back onto yours, a hand roaming up your side until this time, he does actually begin to palm one of your breasts over your shirt. Soon, the other hand joins him in just feeling you, and you can't help but sigh against Izuku's lips.

When you reach the lower buttons, you're careful to not let your hands get too far down as you carefully un-tuck his shirt from his pants. You have to force him to stop massaging your breasts long enough to slide his shirt off his shoulders, stopping to roll your eyes in amusement when you find him wearing an undershirt above the binder. You carefully slide the tank top off, leaving him in just his pants and the colorful All Might-themed chest binder you'd sewn for him shortly after he came out to you. Fingers reach for the zipper tab on the front, but don't close around it just yet. Not when Izuku's breathing quickens the way it does, not when his eyes widen in panic.

"Do you want me to step out while you get out of this and put something else on?"

He squeezes his eyes shut, shaking his head in silence. "Please just... Wait a minute." You nod, hand slowly retreating as Izuku calms himself. 

"C-can we, um, l-level the playing field a little?" he asks when his breathing is a bit steadier.

You blink in surprise. "In what way, 'Zuku?"

He drapes both arms over his face as he answers in a truthfully adorable squeak. "L-like, um, s-so I'm not the only one t-topless..."

Your smile is fond as you pat his cheek and lean in. "Can I give you a show?" you whisper.

He shivers, nodding almost too excitedly, and you pull away with a little giggle. "Stay right here." You scamper to the door, making doubly sure it's locked, and turn back with a sparkle in your eye. With his full attention on you, you cross back to him and tease at the edge of your shirt. You're slow in your movements, teasing, and his eyes are glued to you, jaw slack as you give him a mini strip-tease. 

Man, it's hard to have low self-esteem with a boyfriend like yours. He drinks in the sight of you like it's the first sight of water he's had in months, adoration and awe and lust and all things positive written plain as day in his expression. When your shirt's properly discarded, you give Izuku a little wink and press a gentle, sweet kiss to his lips. "How are we feeling?"

"Good! G-great! T-this is—yeah. Yeah." His face is flushed, pupils blown. His eyes keep darting between meeting yours and somewhere lower

You quirk a smirk at him, trying not to laugh. "So am I good to unzip you, baby?"

His hands come up to cover his face, green peeking out from between his fingers as he nods. "I-I-I think I'm good."

"You sure? I don't want you to push yourself if you're not comf—"

His hand snatches your wrist, forcing the palm of your hand flat against the center of his chest. You can feel his heart racing beneath your fingertips. "I-if it's you, I can do this. Please."

"Stop me if it gets to be too much, okay?" you hum, carefully pinching the zipper tab and pulling it down slowly. His hand doesn't leave your wrist, but he lets you, exhaling softly when you unzip his binder all the way and free his chest from its confines after a long day.

Izuku panics. Not in the way he feared—he doesn't shove you away, doesn't run, doesn't freeze. But he panics all the same, dragging you into a hot, open-mouthed kiss before you can look at him, before he can see your disgust, before you can make fun of him or change your mind or or or or—

Gentle hands slide the binder off his shoulders with an appreciative hum. You're gentle as you straddle his waist, hands tangling in his hair, and when you go to pull back, he chases your lips. You giggle, trying to pull away to speak, but Izuku's too scared to let you—he almost whines as he continues pressing his lips against yours. 

"Everything good, sweetheart?" you ask as best you can amidst his onslaught.

"No—" slips out from his lips. "—I need you to keep kissing me."

"Hm, I can do that. But tell me if something's wrong, okay?" You punctuate your question with a kiss to his nose. He responds by meeting your lips once more.

He pauses, tugging you into a hug moments after breaking the kiss. "I'm a little scared right now," he admits. "You wouldn't... Hate me for how I look, right?" Tears brim in his eyes and wet his voice as he whispers.

"Never in a million years, Izuku. You're always going to be my handsome, strong boyfriend, until you decide you don't want me around anymore. I love you for who you are, not who you want to be, and I'll tell you as many times as it takes."

His arms shake around you. "Thank you. I love you."

"I love you too," you whisper, slowly pulling back as he releases you. "Is it okay if I kiss you, baby?"

"We were already kissing," he says, trying not to laugh.

You press a slow, sensual kiss to his neck. "I know," you breathe out in open, hot breaths, delighting in the way he shivers. "I meant... escalating."

"O-oh." His face is red, as if it could ever stop being red, and you break into a grin when he nods sheepishly. "I-if you want..."

"I very much want." You nod quickly, dragging your nails along his upper arms and around to his shoulders. Goosebumps follow in your wake. "If you'll let me, I'd like to show you all the parts I love about you. But first?"

"M-mm?"

"Say 'yellow' if you need me to pause or 'red' if you want us to stop entirely, alright? The moment you want me to stop. If you aren't sure, 'yellow'. Please? I don't want to cross any boundaries with you."

"Safewords. Okay, I-I think I can do that. Yellow to pause or slow down, red to stop." He nods slowly, a determined pout on his face. You grin and shoot him an adoring gaze before returning to his neck, one hand finding his to intertwine your fingers. His hand trembles in your grasp, but when you squeeze his hand to reassure him, he's quick to squeeze back. "Green to keep going?"

You nod.

"Okay. I'm okay."

You're slow and careful as you begin to kiss down his body, trailing along his jaw and each shoulder. The pads of your fingers massage along the lines where the seams of his binder had been digging into his skin, eliciting shivers beneath your fingertips. Intermittently, he squeezes the hand you've kept intertwined with his, letting out shaky gasps when you drag your tongue back up to his neck.

"You're doing so well," you purr. It's hard to keep your free hand in one place–you drag it back up to indulge in the fluffy curls atop his head only a moment before lightly dragging your nails down his spine.

Next, you trail your lips back down to his chest, pausing to toy briefly with his chest as he lets out a cascade of moans. "[N-name]..."

"Mm?" Your eyes meet his innocently as you lathe your tongue over his nipple, your heart skipping at the lusty, adoring look on his face. You release him from your mouth with a small pop!, tilting your head. "Still good?"

"No, come back," he whines, tugging at your hand.

A giggle escapes you. "Well, since you asked so nicely..."

He shudders as you dive back in, switching to take his other nipple into your mouth. With your closest hand still occupied in holding his, you aren't able to play with the side you'd previously been kissing at, but Izuku doesn't seem to mind as he practically pushes his chest into your face with another gasp.

Soon, all too soon, you continue in your journey to kiss every inch of Izuku's body, palming at his chest and placing one soft kiss against a freckle situated just above his heart. You giggle when you feel his pulse jump beneath your lips before moving on, pressing kisses in a line down the center of his chest until you've found soft skin.

Your free hand finds his belt, toying with the buckle as you get off his lap and rest on the floor in front of him. "Color?"

He eyes you warily, running his thumb across your hand in a way that feels more like he's soothing himself than you. He doesn't answer.

"Izuku, I need to know if this is okay. If you don't answer, I'll stop."

"Y-yellow," he admits meekly. "I-I think it's easier if I don't think about it, but I just... I want this to happen but every second I'm reminded of all the ways this could end in you leaving me, a-and..."

You immediately move your hand away at his admission. "Thank you for telling me. You’re overthinking it, hun. I’m not gonna leave you. Can I help you at all?"

"Distract me?" He pouts at you, leaning down for a kiss. He's even so bold as to slip his tongue into your mouth as you fumble with his belt buckle one-handed, his hand smoothing over your shoulder and down your bare back until you finally manage to get his belt unbuckled and his pants unbuttoned. Once he's unzipped, you smooth your hand over the small of his back, sitting up on your knees to press into the kiss.

Getting him out of his pants with one hand is a challenge, but you make it work, leaving him to toe off his socks and sit there in a loose pair of boxers, looking nervous and innocent and adorable but mostly just scared.

Now that you've got him mostly undressed, you can finally move back to your mission of making him feel utterly loved and working away that fear of his, littering his stomach and sides with tiny pecks and nibbles that have him giggling as he tries (and fails) to squirm away from your onslaught.

"Great job so far," you mumble, nuzzling your nose into his side playfully. "You're really brave, 'Zuku."

He gasps for air between his laughter, scarcely gaining enough time to breathe before you finally relent enough to let him catch his breath. "I love you," he pants out when he finally gets a chance to look down at you. "Thank you."

"I love you more~" you practically sing, punctuating your sentence by blowing a puff of air at his stomach. He squirms, trying not to laugh any more than he already has. You reach up, gently caressing his cheek, and he presses into your touch. "Color?"

Izuku gnaws at his lip. His face is flushed, cheeks flaming red as he pants. After a long moment that you can only imagine is filled with thoughts too fast for anyone else to understand if only they could hear, he speaks. "Green."

A single soft kiss as your hand slips beneath his boxers, giving his ass a teasing squeeze before sliding them off his legs. His tongue slips in your mouth and roams freely as your hand caresses his inner thigh, until all that's left for you to do other than tease him relentlessly is go for broke. You break free from the kiss, watching his face with a smile as you drag a single finger up his slit, finding his clit with ease once you dip between the folds.

No anxiety rears its head now. His jaw goes slack, eyes squeezed tight with pleasure as you slowly rub his slit, a red flush crawling from his cheeks and down his neck as he tries not to moan too loudly. "[n-name]~"

"Hm?" you purr, pausing your finger as it circles his dripping heat teasingly. "Do you need to stop, green bean?"

"N-no!" His eyes snap open, shooting you a pleading, desperate look. "P-please, green, I need more—"

You drop to sit on your knees in front of him, gently spreading his legs to sit between them. "If you're sure, baby. Thank you for asking nicely."

The only sound that escapes him when you finally, finally lean forward and dart your tongue between his folds is a drawn-out moan. Instantly, his free hand finds your head, tangling through your hair and pulling you close. You welcome the momentum, slipping your tongue inside him and using your thumb to rub small circles against his clit. He moans and writhes against your mouth, hips bucking so uncontrollably you're half-tempted to wrap your free arm around his waist and hold him down as you work him up. (If he didn't still have his fingers entwined with yours, you probably would.)

When it gets too much and you're running out of air, you pull back, panting and gazing down at him in appreciation as he whines. "[naaaaame], I was so—"

"Shh," you coo, replacing your tongue with two deft fingers. "I just need a sec to breathe. You're doing so well, Izuku."

His walls pulse around your fingers at your words, green eyes shining with tears that almost make you stop completely if not for the fact that he's still trying to fuck himself on your fingers. You curl them experimentally, brushing against a spongy spot inside him that has him keening and thrashing against you. You re-position clumsily, dragging him into a kiss to muffle his noises as you continue to assault his g-spot. It’d be bad if someone heard the two of you, after all.

It's not long after that that you manage to push him over the edge, his pleasured moans spilling into your mouth as his walls flutter around you. A scarred hand squeezes around yours tightly as he manages to babble your name. You pump your fingers into his dripping cunt just a little bit longer, giving him something to ride out his orgasm on until his moaning turns into whimpers and his hips still. You smile softly when, upon trying to pull away to sit in a less awkward position, he pulls you back to kiss you again

You slowly remove your fingers from him, taking the small window he gives you to sit beside him on the bed and kiss the scar on his hand. His shoulders shudder as you pull him into your lap and a tight hug. "You did so well, Izuku," you coo into his ear.

He sniffles and would have launched himself at you if not for the fact that he was already as close as he could get—his arms lock you into place, snuggling into you tightly as he sobs.

"Is everything okay, Izu? What’s got you upset, green bean?" You carefully wipe your fingers on the sheets before beginning to card your fingers through his hair.

"I-I don't—I don't know! I'm sorry, I—"

"Shh, it's okay. You're okay, Izu. You did so well." You begin to pepper his temples in light kisses. 

"I-I always thought that—that I'd never get any of this. That if I ever—ever found someone like you and loved them and they actually loved me, that they'd never... 'cus I'm... f-for a lot of reasons, they wouldn't ever want to do anything like this with me," he babbles, finding every word more difficult to force out than the last. "They'd... they'd get to this point and then they'd realize that this isn't... that I'm not what they want. What they ever wanted. But... this is real. It is, isn't it?"

"It's real, Izuku."

He breaks at that. "Thank you. I'm sorry. I love you."

You patiently run your fingers through his hair, working through any knots you find and trying not to let yourself cry with him. "It's okay, baby. I love you too."

"I'm sorry," he repeats. Hot tears begin to drop onto your shoulder as he tries to bring himself even closer. "I'm so sorry."

"You have nothing to apologize for, honey," you insist. "Really."

"I-I never thought I'd be..." He trails off, lets out another sob.

Your heart wrenches, and you smooth your hand over his back. "Loved?"

His silence speaks volumes.

"Oh gosh, Izu." You want to hold him close, to kiss him until he forgets every self-deprecating thought he's ever had. But you're already holding him, already as close as you can get, and genuinely, if you see his face right now, it won't be long before you're also bursting into tears. So you stay there, rubbing circles into his back as you search for the words—any words—to help him understand just how you feel. "You know I love you, right? I said it earlier, and I'll say it as many times as you need me to."

"I love you too," he mumbles, his tears finally beginning to subside. You wriggle your way from him, just enough to press soft kisses to his face.

"I mean it. More than anything, I love you. Thank you for trusting me. Thank you for being honest with me, and thank you for confiding in me." With every "thank you" and "I love you", you pause to press another kiss to his face. The wrenching in your chest finally subsides when, after the fourth tiny kiss, he lets out a giggle. "Thank you for existing, baby. I'm so fucking glad I met you, and even if we'd never done this, even if we'd never gotten together, I'd still be glad I met you. You're loved, Izuku, and I'll remind you every day, every hour, if you need me to. As often as it takes for you to never question it again."

"Thank you. Sorry."

You laugh, pressing a kiss to his nose. "Stop apologizing. We here at [name], Inc. are of the official opinion that Mister Izuku Midoriya has never done anything wrong, ever, and will not be accepting constructive criticism at this time."

Finally, a proper laugh bubbles from his throat, and he finds it in himself to smile at you—complete, adoring, loving. He even lets himself believe it as the two of you lay down cuddled up to each other. 

As long as he's by your side, he thinks he can continue to believe it. 

He's complete. Adored. Loved.

[fowl-fox]

Weather, Together

A one-shot based off a prompt sent to me by the ever talented @fowlblue Timangelino AU, hurt/comfort, contains (very mild) suggestive language at one point.

---

It was not quite an hour before noon when the first rumbles of thunder reached Jon Spiro’s ears.

It had been a dreary morning, and he had been expecting rain. The wind had been howling since he’d woken up alone, curled up in the middle of the enormous bed that belonged to Mr. and Mrs. Fowl.

And me, he reminded himself, Angeline’s loving assurances from the night before echoing in his mind. Our bed.

It wasn’t unusual for the other two to be up before him. Artemis Senior and Angeline often started their early mornings with a quick workout, before freshening up and joining their children for breakfast. Jon’s stomach couldn’t handle anything solid in the morning, so he usually took the extra few hours for sleep. He admired his partners’ ability to rise and shine most mornings, but secretly, he wished they’d sleep in more often. It was nice to wake up next to someone else, he’d discovered.

The thunder rumbled again, already much louder. He didn’t pay it much mind.

He wondered if his lovers were too busy to be bothered at the moment; he was finding it hard to concentrate on his own work. Jon looked over the reports his secretary had forwarded to him and sighed. Perhaps he could use a break. Closing his laptop, he walked over to the window and looked out at the manor grounds. He was becoming more and more familiar with them every time he stayed. Not too far off, the limbs of a downy birch waved dramatically in the wind of the oncoming storm, as though it could scare away the rolling black clouds headed towards them. He remembered Tim trying to teach him the names of the different trees that surrounded Fowl Manor. For the most part, the names didn’t stick.

I remember that one though, thought Jon. He grinned wickedly. Pressed Tim right up against it.

---

The thunder rumbled once more, this time with enough volume to rattle the window panes and shake Jon from his salacious thoughts. Droplets of rain began to tap a warning on the glass in front of him. Jon decided he’d take a break after all, and headed out of the study he’d been given to see what Tim and Angeline were up to.

A quick walk through the common areas of Fowl Manor did not reveal anyone other than one of the maids, who apologetically told Jon that she did not know where any of the Fowls were. Jon sighed and pulled out his phone, dialing a few quick text messages. He wandered into the surprisingly cozy kitchen that was used to prepare the family’s meals while he waited for a response.

The décor could use an upgrade, he thought, as he grabbed a plate from a cabinet that was from the 1970s at the latest, before peering in the fridge. He was halfway through his simple snack of cheese and crackers before his phone buzzed in his pocket. Angeline had responded.

Took the boys out for some shopping :-) Timmy should be home.

Ok :-) he replied. He wasn’t a fan of these ‘smileys’ as the youth called them, but Angeline thought they were cute, so he’d indulge her. He unceremoniously crammed the last few crackers in his mouth before leaving his plate on the counter and heading back out into the entrance hall.

Fowl Manor was a bit of an enigma to Spiro. It was old but sturdy, meticulously maintained, and crammed full of art and antiquities, though incredibly, it did not feel cluttered. It was as tasteful as a display of enormous wealth and privilege could be. It somehow seemed simultaneously spacious and cramped. It reminded him of a rabbit’s warren; he’d read about them in a book once. The entrance hall gave way to several doors and hallways- the grand staircase did the same. When the Fowl family was home, it felt safe to him; a warm retreat from the cold and the dangers outside. But when he was alone? It seemed almost unbearably empty. The eyes in the portraits of previous generations that covered the walls seemed particularly unwelcoming as he stood under them. If he was a superstitious man, he’d swear the place was haunted. Jon had no clue how anyone else could stand to be in such a place on their own.

There was a startling flash of lightning through the entrance hall’s high windows, temporarily bathing the walls and the polished parquet floor in white light. The thunder outside roared and shook the old building once more. The wind howled mournfully outside; the storm was fully upon them now.

He checked his phone again, frowning. Tim still had not responded to him, which was unusual. The man checked his cell phone habitually. Maybe he went back to bed? Jon wondered. For the most part the Fowl Patriarch had recovered from his ‘ordeal’ in the Arctic, but every now and then, phantom limb pains would creep up on him, and he would retreat to the bedroom with a grumble and a microwave heat pack in tow.

(Jon wasn’t sure how the heat pack was supposed to help phantom pains, but he didn’t question it. He wasn’t a doctor.)

He was heading towards the bedroom when he noticed that the door to his partner’s study was cracked open ever so slightly. He must have just missed him on his way to the kitchen earlier, he realized. Jon didn’t bother knocking before peering in.

---

Sure enough, Artemis Senior was inside, sitting next to the fireplace in his favorite chair. He was draped across it in what seemed an unusually casual pose for him. His face was cradled in his hands, the thumb of his left slowly rubbing over the pink scar tissue that wound about from under his chin to just above his eye. But it wasn’t Tim’s draped figure or his slow ministrations to his scars that bothered Jon. It was his eyes. The man was staring far off into the distance, far beyond the room he sat in, beyond Jon standing in the doorway. He made no sign that he even knew anyone else was there.

“Tim?”

His partner didn’t respond, continuing to stare right through him. Jon swallowed, unsure of what to do.

“Tim?” he tried again. There was still no response.

The thunder roared once more, violently shaking the window panes of the study. Tim’s eyes still did not move, but the rest of him froze completely still. Jon realized he wasn’t even breathing.

His first urge was to grab the other man by the shoulders and shake him, to tell him to snap out of it. But some quiet part of him overrode his rough instincts, telling him that wasn’t a good idea. And for once, he listened to that quieter part of himself. God forbid he freak Tim out worse. What would Angeline do? he thought to himself. He walked slowly over to his frozen partner, taking care not to get too close, but still within easy reach.

“Tim, it’s me. I’m right here, okay?” he said softly, slowly waving his hand in front of Tim’s face, his jewelry jingling. The other man didn’t respond, but he didn’t startle either. That had to be good start, right? Jon noticed that he had slowly started breathing again, albeit a bit shakily. He paused his waving thoughtfully, before allowing himself to try something that on paper would have sounded ludicrous.

“Hey, Tim? Pspspspsps? Tim?” he grinned mischievously, purposefully jingling his jewelry near his partner’s ear as though he were a kitten. Tim’s breathing slowly evened out, and his brow furrowed.

Then suddenly, he blinked. Glacier blue eyes focused on the wrist of the man in front of him, before settling on Jon’s own.

“What,” he swallowed, voice strained. “What in God’s name are you doing?”

“Trying to get your attention.” Jon grinned, relieved. That familiar grumpy face was a much more welcome sight than the haunted stare he’d walked in on.

Artemis Senior sighed, re-adjusting himself into a proper seating position while straightening out his shirt sleeves.

“Well, you have it. What do you want, Jon?”

Jon straightened up and gave a short laugh that sounded like a cricket hidden in a drain pipe.

“I want to know if you’ll come watch some TV with me.”

Tim groaned. “Not it if you’re watching one of those ridiculous soap operas.”

“Tim, I promise, we can watch whatever boring crap you like.”

Thunder shook the house again, and for a second Tim froze once more. Jon grew worried, and jingled his wrist again. To his relief, the other man seemed to shake himself back into the present.

“The history program isn’t boring.”

“To you it’s not. C’mon Tim.” he held out his hand, grinning again when it was reluctantly accepted.

---

It was a little while later, seated together in front of the television in one of the more tucked away, windowless sitting rooms, that Jon decided to pry a bit.

“Didn’t know you were scared of storms.”

Tim didn’t respond, keeping his eyes on screen.

“Tim?”

“I’m not.” he said finally, sighing. His hand went his leg, and for a moment Jon though he would say something else. But Tim remained silent. He refused to look anywhere but the television screen.

He spared a glance up at the winding scars that covered one side of Artemis Seniors face, and suddenly, something in his mind clicked.

“I see.” was all he said, leaning up against Tim.

A few more minutes passed before Jon decided he’d take another chance.

“Hey, Tim?”

“What, Jon?”

“Can I?”

“Can you what?” sighed Tim, deciding it wasn’t worth the effort to correct his grammar. Looking over at Jon, he found his hand carefully hovering near his cheek, over the pink scar tissue. He swallowed, mulling over the implied question.

“Alright,” he said, after a minute.

Jon lightly traced his fingers over the raised marks, following the twists in the grooves where searing hot flames had attempted to eat away his lover’s flesh. Tim sat still, his eyes closed, breath deep and slow. Jon continued tracing patterns before lightly cupping his jaw both hands, turning his face to meet his and carefully pressing a kiss to his lips. He internally celebrated when Tim didn’t protest. The man’s startling blue eyes opened, giving him a look of acceptance. Jon smiled, turning Tim’s head slightly to the side, and hovered his lips over the largest mark. It was a long, jagged gash that carved its way down from his brow, over his eyelids, and settled deep underneath a prominent cheekbone.

He opened his mouth to ask again, but to his surprise, Tim spoke first.

“Go ahead.”

He pressed his lips to the mark, holding them there for several seconds. Tim closed his eyes once more and breathed in deep as his chest filled with a warmth that rose up to his shoulders, up to his neck, and finally settled in his head, the constant buzz of anxiety that haunted him temporarily subsiding to the pleasant feeling that until recently, only Angeline had ever gifted him. Memories of roaring fires, suffocating smoke, panic, confusion, freezing water, and overwhelming pain suddenly gave way to the present, the cozy room they were tucked into, and the warm lips of the man seated beside him.

He basked in it momentarily before taking Jon’s head into his own hands and pressing a kiss of his own to his lips.

“Thank you, Jon.”

“Don’t mention it,” grinned Jon, feeling airy. “Can we watch something else now?”

Artemis Senior groaned, settling back into the couch.

“Fine,” he said, though he honestly wasn’t that upset about it. Jon would be Jon. “Anything but one of your gore-fests.”

“Oh c’mon,” said Jon, grabbing the remote, flicking through the guide. “Those movies are good for you, keeps the blood pumping.”

“Whatever you say.”

Jon laughed.

---

A few hours later, after the storm had passed, Angeline and the Fowl offspring would return to find Jon entranced by some terrible 90’s slasher flick, with Tim dozing on his shoulder. Angeline winked at her sons. Artemis Junior and Myles rolled their eyes in return and quickly dispersed. Beckett wanted to watch the movie, but with a pointed look from Angeline, Jon turned it off. The remaining boy groaned and went off to find his twin.

Angeline settled on the arm of the couch beside Jon and placed a kiss on the top of his head. Artemis Senior stirred slightly beside them, but didn’t open his eyes.

“How are you, darlings?” she said, reaching over Jon to run her fingers through her dozing husband’s hair. “What a nasty storm that was, the grounds are a mess.”

Jon gave her his best sleazy grin.

“Oh, we made it through just fine.” he said, reaching up to take her other hand.

Angeline smiled and hummed, and Jon marveled at how such an elegant woman could pull off such a mischievous grin of her own.

“I see,” she said, settling cat-like on her perch. “I’m glad to hear it.”

“We’re glad you’re back,” he said, picking up the remote. “You want to pick something else to watch?”

Angeline hummed again, thinking.

“How about Fair City?”

A soap opera. Beside them on the couch, Tim groaned.

[kayzume]

Pairing: Bokuto x Reader

Genre: a tiny, tiny bit of angst, but mostly fluff:>

wc: 4.1k, who knew i can pull of something this long😃

Note: This fic is my gift to @jayeray for our server secret santa, Happy Holidays to you I hope you had a great Christmas and I hope we get to talk more (timezone is sht, I must be asleep when yer online🥲)I hope this piece makes you smile:>. Also sorry for shamelessly asking three people to beta this bec im not sure about how it turned out, also bec my grammar is sht(T ^ T)—also lemme thank the internet by helping me with them vows, only edited some parts of it to fit the story better..

Beta: @thirstyforthem2dmen , @india-katsuki , @prismaintales kithes to all of u

Back to Masterlist

Life is filled with fluttering moments, these events mark something within us that would either make us...or break us. You guessed that most of your story has made you what you are today. You were walking in the park hand in hand with Koutaro and your daughter, playing with his hair while she sat on his shoulders.

“Momma can I ask something?” your daughter spoke breaking silence.

“What is it baby?” you responded

“How’d you meet dad?” she asked cocking her head to the side, much like her father when he’s curious. You smiled at her,

“Well…”

￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣

‘The Meeting’

“Hey, Hey” you ignored whatever that was and whoever was making those annoying calls. Your face remained buried on the textbook required for your literature elective. Lost in your own thoughts and the flow of music through your earbuds, you missed the exasperated sigh that left the lips of the one and only Bokuto Kutaro, star player of the volleyball team.

“Hey miss!” tap tap the loud tapping burst your train of thoughts pulling one of your buds out, you glared at the man in front of you.

“What? You got nothing better to do buddy?!” you spat in utter annoyance.

“You’re in my seat” he replied grimly, lowkey telling you to scoot over. You, in return, refused to leave your spot; checking every nook and cranny to try and look for names or scribblings.

“Doesn’t have your name on it, you can’t stake a claim and this is school property” you argue pettily. He looked at you in disbelief.

“B-but Akaashi sits right here” he whispered, albeit to himself. You stifled a scoff, he looked so upset at the fact that he can’t sit beside this ‘Akaashi’ person. You cleared your throat and offered him the other side of your spot, which is free.

“Why don’t you sit here instead, you’d still be near your friend. I wouldn’t hinder any chatter that you decide to make” is what you told him. There’s no particular reason as to why you wouldn’t move instead, just that your pride isn’t letting you, besides his reactions are very much worth the trouble. The classroom doors creaked open, students pouring in and occupying the seats. A man with dark hair approached you, or rather the seat beside you. He eyed the person you were conversing with just now. He didn’t utter a word and took his seat beside you. A few minutes later the bells started ringing signaling the start of lectures, your professor walked in clutching big old dusty books of classic literature, your not so favorite. The only reason you were even taking this class is for the extra credits, that you most definitely do not need. You were bored and needed a new source of entertainment. For normal students this must seem ridiculous, because studying isn’t counted as a source of fun. Take note ‘normal’ you were far from normal. You’re friendless, you were having a hard time mingling with others your age. It's not that you were getting bullied, it's just you and your foreboding trust issues. You hated the feeling of betrayal and refused to remember what it was like, so as a coping mechanism you refused to make friends, or even open up to anyone.

Bokuto was upset that he didn’t get to sit beside Akaashi, he was a year ahead but the volleyball coaches as much as they hate to prevent him from playing official games, he was failing english literature and needed to keep up his grades in order to enter the court again. Easier said than done, his literature class held him back from moving further. His professor sponsored his letter so that he will only be held back by one subject and not the whole year, all he had to do now is pass the semester with flying colors, and so far he was having a hard time. That’s the reason he needed to sit near Akaashi so the later can help him with his studies, then this woman came out of nowhere and taking his seat is not helping the least bit and he hates it.

“L/N-san we would like to request your assistance” your professor spoke in a low voice. Assistance in what matter, it seems important that it looks almost impossible to refuse.

“I’d be glad to lend a hand, but with what, sensei you rarely ask for favors it feels new” you replied

“Please tutor Bokuto Kotarou, he’s an oncoming senior but has been held back by this subject. If he fails one more time he’d have to repeat the whole year, and this might also put a bad name for his sports scholarship” She explained, you looked at the profile of the student you need to tutor, it was him, the guy with condiments hair.

￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣

“Condiments hair?” your daughter asked in confusion

“Mom was so mean right?? She called dad condiments, do I look like a bottle of ketchup baby?” Koutaro countered on your daughter with faux pity.

“Oh please, your hair is literally salt and pepper, and yeah you looked like a bottle of ketchup when you blush” you chuckled responding to them.

￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣

‘The Courtship’

It’s been five months since you started teaching Kotarou, and the two of you were past the last name formalities. He was still the same as when you first met, loud and annoying. But you’d never tell him that, because as you’ve observed he has times where he just suddenly drops his attitude and becomes sort of gloomy head in the clouds type of persona. It was confusing and downright weird.

You were at the library looking for articles that can support your paper. It was 6pm, you were hungry and sleepy from studying the whole day, and you were starting to get bored. But since your paperwork is nowhere near done you just couldn't leave.

You heaved a deep sigh and rubbed your now strained eyes, feeling the drowsiness trying to pull you into passing out.

BAM.

You suddenly jolted in your seat, you looked at your side where the loud thump came from. Koutaro was pulling the seat beside you.

“What are you doing here? Don’t you have practice” you asked him, he rarely— almost never skips his volleyball practices.

He sat down properly and jingled a bag in your face.“I had a feeling you’d be hungry by now, I heard from Akaashi that you’re pulling all nighters for your class paper, besides we didn't have session today too, and yes, I have practice today” He replied so calmly it weirded you out a bit.

“Then what—” you started asking again when he rudely pressed his pointing finger at your lips. You were so tempted to bite him.

“I ditched, because of our session” he told you, “and also because I want to bring you some food” he continued.

“Kou, we don’t have sessions during Fridays. You specifically asked me to skip tutoring you on Fridays because you said you want to spend this day hanging out with your friends” you replied to his nonsense. You’re grateful that he thought of you and brought you food, but also you didn’t want to take away his personal time with his friends.

“Uhh y/n, you are my friend too so technically I’m still hanging out and spending my time wisely” he told you while opening a bag of pretzels for the two of you to share. You were thankful you picked the most isolated wing of the library to study or else you two would’ve been kicked out from munching loudly.

You blushed a shade of pink not because he said he sees you as a friend, your cherry blossom cheeks represent the embarrassment and lowkey disappointment that you felt knowing that a friend is all that you will be to him.

“I meant special. You’re a very special friend y/n, and that I hope you’ll allow me to offer you more than a special friendship…” he trailed off looking deeply in the depths of your pooling eyes. You can’t help but feel overwhelmed at the butterflies that started storming from within you. If you were a cherry blossom before, you’d definitely be a red rose now.

“Whatever do you mean by that?” you asked him sheepishly, lowering your head to shield him from seeing you in such an unsightly state. You fiddled with your hands whilst waiting for him to give you an answer.

“Y/n, C-can I court you?” He replied with a sweet smile.

‘The Answer’

It’s been a couple of months since Bokuto’s confession and up to this day you still feel giddy about it. Who would’ve thought that you’ll attract someone the complete opposite of you.

Whenever he visits your dorm or whenever you accompany each other somewhere he doesn’t fail to do something sweet to show his affection towards you. You were having mixed feelings whether to give him a chance or not. ‘Relationships are scary’ you thought, but the idea of him doing those sweet things for others gives a painful churn within you. He invited you to attend a game of his and cheer for him.

“Cheers for goodluck” is what he said the last time you met, which was the day before. You entered the gym, the bright lights blinding your sight. Lightly covering up you headed for the bleachers.

The place was already packed from students and other volleyball patrons. You see some free seats, only to be disappointed when they were actually reserved, you turn to leave for a new place when,

“Y/n!! where are you going? Your seat is right here!!” you craned your neck to where the voice came from only to see Koutaro waving at you. He walked to where you were.

“Sit here and cheer for me as loud as you can” he told cracking a beautiful smile. He wasn’t even doing anything special but you could feel the hotness creeping it’s way from your neck to your cheeks.

“O-okay, do your best out there” without even thinking your body moved on its own to give him a peck on his cheeks. His face contorted in surprise, you thought you did something wrong that it made you a little bit conscious, as you we’re pulling away he held your hand and you stared at his blushing face.

“Do it again” he almost sounds commanding if not for his hands slightly shaking in yours

“W-what...I’m sorry my body moved on it’s own” you started,

“Do it again...to double the luck” is what his reply was, you looked down feeling the loud thumping of your heart in your chest you quickly gave his other cheek a peck.

“G-go now, I think the game is about to start” you shoo him away as you try to calm yourself down. You can’t believe you kissed someone. And in public too. For other people it may not be a big thing but for you, that kiss felt special.

(Game goes, 4th Set)

They were at match point and as the game goes, Koutaro suddenly went on his ‘emo mode’, he was dumbfounded just standing there. You looked worried, there was no way they’re going to lose.

“Just one more point” you whispered to yourself, the ball was set and it looks like Koutaro will go for a shot, he still looked out of it. He needs to get out of his slump. An idea came to mind, it was so unlike you to do something like that but you closed your eyes and just goes for it.

“Take that shot and win!!” you screamed the loudest that you can. You saw him stiffen and slowly he ran and jumped, he spiked the ball so hard it bounced with a hard thud, you almost thought it left a mark on the floor. You heard the loud cheers and a loud buzz, signaling that the game comes to a close.

You sighed in relief to see that your little stunt helped him. You were about to go to and congratulate him when he meets you somewhere in the middle.

“Did I do great y/n-chan?” he asked, his eyes sparkling in anticipation almost as if waiting for a praise.

“You did absolutely great, I had fun watching you,I’m sorry I barely cheered loud, I’m not used to public gatherings like this” you shook your head in embarrassment

“Thank you for cheering me on, uhh y/n since we won, don’t you think it’s fitting that i get a gift from you” he told you. You were a bit puzzled, you didn’t get him anything.

“I- I didn’t get you anythi—” you started only to be cut off by him asking,

“Can I please date you now?”

You smiled at him, “Yea sure”

￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣

“I don’t get it, what was the gift that you gave him, if you didn’t buy him one” she asked again tilting her head

“I gave him my answer” you only smiled on her more evident confusion

￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣

‘The Veil and The Bow’

“Calm down Bokuto-san, everything is perfect” Akaashi told Bokuto as they waited for the large wooden doors to open. It has been 5 years since the two of you started going out and 6 months since he proposed. When you said ‘yes’ to his impromptu proposal he couldn’t believe his ears, at first he was worried and ready to pass it off as a joke but then…

“LET'S GO FOR A DRIVE!!” Koutaro screamed out of nowhere, you gave him a look. Raising an eyebrow in confusion you asked,

“Right now?” he must be joking you thought

“Why not?” he asked dumbly, cocking his head to the side

“Uhh..Kou, it’s 11pm.” you told him nonchalantly, you continued filing on your laptop when you felt him tug at your shirt.

“What?” you asked him without looking, he tugged again. This time as you take on his face, he bit his pouty lips and looked at you straight in the eyes as if begging.

“Really? Where are we even going?” you asked him again whilst standing up and slipping on your warmer.

He looked so excited he rushed to get his keys when he came back to you. He engulfed you in a big hug, snuggling his face in the crook of your neck.

He let out a small “Thank you”

Feeling his hot breath tickling your neck, you gently pushed him off.

“Are we just gonna stand and hug here?” you jabbed him jokingly as if to hide your reddening cheeks. He held your hand and guided you to his awaiting car. You’ve been driving for quite a while, just seeing where the night takes the two of you.

It took you the beach

You walked on the cold sand hand in hand. It was dark and chilly, you shuddered and Koutaro held you close to him, you heard him squeak,

“What was that? Did you say something?” you asked him just to make sure.

“We’re here” he announced, you looked at your surroundings only to see a gazebo all set up with candles, a picnic blanket and plush pillows. You looked at Koutaro stunned

“T-this is all planned?” you asked him stunned at the effort he pulled. No wonder he badly wants to go. You felt warm through the cold on how sweet he was

“You looked so stressed with work I thought that a date will cheer you up even a little” he told you as he fiddled with his hands, even though he was slightly looking down you can clearly see his reddish ears. You couldn’t contain yourself so you tiptoed and kissed him.

“Thank you Kou, having you around is already calming to me, but you did all this too, you’re so sweet, i love you you’re the best thing I could ever ask for” you told him while caressing his cheeks.

He moved his hands to engulf yours, he slowly pushed your hands of to his mouth, giving your palms a peck.

“No, thank you y/n for giving me a chance to be with someone like you,” he told you as he stared at you lovingly.

The night goes by and the two of you ate, laughed, and told each other stories. You two were lying quietly staring at the stars glittering in the night sky.

Sigh.

You looked at Koutaro after he heaved that deep sigh.

“Hey, something wrong” you nudged him a little.

“Nothing...it’s just that I want us to stay like this forever, happy and contented, say y/n, can I ask you something?” he replied, you were curious as to what he was going to ask it seems like a big deal to him.

“Hmm?” you hummed in response

“Y/n...will you stay with me for as long as you can..i mean forever..i mean as long as we can, Can we stay with each other” he asked you in almost a whisper

“Are you—” you were about to ask when he looked at you in all seriousness.

“Y/n L/n, will you marry me?” you can’t keep the surprise in your face, you blushed deeply, it was weird for him to be this serious, but you’re not gonna lie you like this side of him too, you stared at him for a hot minute and cracked your sweetest smile.

“I thought you’d never ask”

The big doors cracked open, the music flowing, Bokuto stared as you walk to where he was, at the altar, waiting.

As the wedding goes on, it was finally time to say your vows, you looked at Koutaro who is now holding a microphone on his left hand and his right gripping into yours,

“Since the day I met you, I knew you were a special woman. And even though I suck at Literature,it will forever be my favorite subject that I ever enrolled in. From that day forward that I met you in that god forsaken class, I became a true believer that you do not find true love, but true love finds you.

You, more than anyone else, know my insecurities and weaknesses and still never make me feel inadequate. You have always loved me without reservations. You praise me in a way I never thought was possible and because of you, I am the best man I can be.

I cannot promise I will always be the perfect husband, but I promise to love you through the good times and bad. To choose our love every single day. I promise to always fight with you and for you, never against you. I promise to always be your biggest fan, confidant and best friend. I promise to remember we are not perfect—only perfect for each other. I promise to love you without hesitation or boundaries from this day forward, for the rest of my life.

Thank you for being the woman of my dreams and the best partner I could ever ask for. Thank you for being the pillar that my wacky soul has always needed and I will forever be your wings. Everything in me recognizes your heart as my home and your arms, my shelter.

You are my better half and very best friend. I will love you, honor you, respect and cherish you in sickness and health, through sorrows and success, for all the days of my life. I am forever yours."

You bit your lip to calm yourself from sobbing into his heartfelt words. You felt his love from every single thing that he spewed out. You were thankful to where you are now, you were thankful to god that gave you a man like Bokuto Koutaro to love you. As you dab away the heavy tears on your face and as clear your throat you tell him your vows in return.

“I want so badly to be able to explain all the love I have for you. Not the love of butterflies and stomach knots—but more the blurring of self and the entanglement with another soul. Love is a word that is much too soft and used far too often to ever describe the fierce, infinite and blazing passion that I have in my heart for you. You are a million dreams and a million prayers of a little girl come true. You are kind. You are silly. You are intelligent—in your own way. Your laugh is contagious and you can put away an entire ice cream cake in one sitting like nobody else can. You acknowledge my strengths and accept my faults. You make me want to be a better person every day. I take you as you are now, tomorrow and for eternity to come, to be my husband.

Even when the day comes that we're old and gray, I promise to always see you with the same eyes and the same heart that I see you with at this exact moment. So today, I vow to honor you and respect you, support you and encourage you. I promise to dream with you, celebrate with you, and walk beside you through whatever life brings. I vow to laugh with you and comfort you during times of joy and times of sorrow. I promise to always pursue you, to fight for you, and love you unconditionally and wholeheartedly for the rest of my life. You are my best friend and I'm the luckiest person on Earth to call you mine."

As you finished your vows you couldn’t help the cracking of your voice, you felt hot tears flow from your eyes, you looked at him as he wipes all of them away.

“Shhh..don’t cry, everyone might get the wrong idea” Koutaro told you as he dabbed on your face. You only chuckled at him, he’s far too precious and you’re lucky to be able to witness it.

“You’re the one getting the wrong idea Kou, these are happy tears. Finally we’re binded forever and always.” you smiled at him as the priest continues on the ceremony

“Forever and always” he whispered back at you as the two of you we’re slipping on your wedding rings.

The priest announced “I pronounce you man and wife, may you live long and build a happy life together.”

He kissed you as the cheers filled the room.

‘The Life’

“Kou!! Go and chase Kaori!!” you instructed your husband to follow your daughter as she ran around away from you. She’s so much like her father, in personality and in looks. You had her 3years ago, and now you would’ve chased her yourself if not for your heavy bulging stomach. You were 7 months in your second pregnancy and everything was hard to do. Thank god for Koutaro, even though he was busy because of his job as a professional athlete he always make sure to make time for you, he always comes home early and makes sure throughout the day that you’re feeling fine. At times he will bring your daughter along to work to lessen the things that you have to think about for the day.

Today was special, he took a day off to take the threeof you to the park. You were tired from playing with the two of them the whole day. So you decided that the three of you should rest a bit, but your child has other plans of her own as soon as you situated yourself on a bench she hopped off and ran. That was why you asked your husband to chase her off to bring her back. The two of them was now in your line of sight, you didn’t want to scold your daughter but, she was extremely hyper and you didn’t want her to trip and fall then hurt herself.

“Bokuto Kaori, you do not just go and run away, against mom’s request, what if you hurt yourself?” you asked her as gentle as you can, even so she still whimpered at you scolding her. She looked at you with big teary eyes.

“I’m so sowwy momma, I only went to go pick these flowers for you” she answered you as she took out three wildflowers from her back, you cooed at how sweet she was. You waved at her to come close and she did, you engulfed her in a loving embrace kissing her temples lightly,

“Aww thank you baby,” you looked up to see Koutaro surprisingly quiet. He was staring at the two of you, he was filled with love and he was grateful for the family you two built together.

“Can I join that hug?” he asked, you opened your arms as he rushed into them almost crushing your daughter in between. The three of you laughed while coddled like that. You looked up at the sky, thankfully smiling.

Gen Taglist open: @kitayawa @aruhappy

[stankyleg89]

Open Window

Peter Parker x Reader (pretty gender neutral)

Warnings: a bit of language

Summary: A 3 am call from a certain web-slinging hero leads to new revelations

a/n: I stayed up until 2 am on a writing spree lol hope you enjoy. I think the reader is p gender neutral unless I missed something

   ✤✤✤  ✤✤✤  ✤✤✤  ✤✤✤  ✤✤✤  ✤✤✤  ✤✤✤  ✤✤✤  ✤✤✤  ✤✤✤  ✤✤✤

Ding ding! Ding ding!

I groggily got up and rubbed my eyes. The disoriented feeling in my head cleared as I stretched my arms. I flipped my phone to see Peters contact lighting up my phone. I looked to the corner of my screen.

3:17 am. 

Damn it Peter. Why does he have to call me this late?

I swiped my finger across the screen and held it up to my ear. “Mmmm-Yello?” I said, trying to sound coherent. 

Peter's voice rang through my head “Hey Y/N, how's it going?”

This is what he called me at 3 in the morning for? To see how it's going?

“Well, Peter, I was about to head out for a vigorous night of drinking and partying, but I was so rudely interrupted by a call from my favorite superhero,” I responded sarcastically. 

He took a minute to respond “Really?”

“No, dummy, I was sleeping. What could you possibly need at this hour!”

There was a long silence. I even checked my phone to see if he had accidentally hung up, but no, he was still on. 

“Peter?” 

“Right, yeah, can I come over? I can’t sleep and I don’t know what to do. I tried everything--I even went for a swing around the city, nothing!” He paused again. I could hear the gears in his head turning. It was almost like… he was hiding something. Nonetheless, I couldn’t say no to Peter, he was my best friend (besides Ned of course).

“Yeah, absolutely.” I began to sit up in my bed, trying extra hard to rub the sleep out of my eyes, “So, I’ll see you in 10?” I got up headed to open my window. The cold February wind wafted through, mixing with the warm air in my room, leaving goosebumps that crawled on my skin. It was nights like these that made sleeping under all of your covers so amazingly comfortable.

“Actually, funny thing. I may have swung all the way to your apartment. I’m outside now.” I heard a clunk from outside the window and a familiar mask popped down from above my window. I jumped back, not expecting the web-slinger so soon. I regained my composure and hung up the phone, throwing it on the bed, along with myself as Peter let himself in. 

I turned and watched as Peter crawled into my window, hitting one of the pots with his foot. Just as quickly as he kicked it, his spider senses had kicked in and he had caught it, managing to only spill a little soil on my rug. He looked up at me, and I could tell through the mask that he had a small, almost embarrassed smile on his face. He made it through the rest of the window and set the small plant back on the sill, promptly closing the window with it. He took off his mask and turned to me, throwing it onto my desk. I looked closer at him and noticed the tired in his eyes. He looked downright miserable.

I pulled the numerous blankets back and patted the spot next to me, “hop on in, partner,” a small, sincere smile drew itself on my face. He tapped the spider on his chest and the suit immediately deflated itself, pooling at Peter's feet. He stepped out and draped it over the back of my desk chair. He was wearing nothing but his boxers as he stood in front of me. I guess he didn't realize until we had met eyes, but no sooner we had both begun to blush. I looked away out of a mixture of embarrassment and curtesy, and cleared my throat. “Um, I think I have a spare set of mens sweatpants if you want some,” I tried my hardest to sound cool, and calm. I heard a small “yes please” from Peter and immediately hopped up from the bed and went to my dresser.

I was rummaging through my dresser for a good minute, and for every second I could feel Peter behind me, trying his hardest to act casual. Swaying back and forth and looking around my room, trying to distract himself with it all. I found my sweats and turned back to Peter, who immediately met my eyes again. I looked away quickly and walked over to him, handing the pants over. Our eyes once again met, but this time it felt less awkward, like we were both two people who were fully clothed. I soon came to realize that neither of us were. He was holding a pair of my sweatpants, standing in his boxers. I was in an oversized Green Day t-shirt and underwear. Once again we were both blushing. 

It's not my fault though. The way he was basically naked in front of me. His chiseled body was like looking at a fucking god, I mean… God Damn. Let me just say I would not hesitate to let that man DESTROY me, but I could never tell him. No matter how lovestruck I was, Peter was a friend first, eye candy second. Plus, I knew he probably didn’t feel the same way, I heard him talking to Ned one day about how he was thinking about asking Liz to Homecoming. But just because he was off the market, doesn’t mean I can’t admire the product. 

I gave him a smile as he slipped the sweats on, and walked back over to the bed. Giving him a once over I broke the silence, “Damn, Parker, my sweats are doing wonders for your ass,” I let out a laugh as he turned to me, a coy smile and a blush plastered on his face. This made me laugh even harder, which made Peter let out some quiet laughter. He climbed into bed next to me and we both lied down, the laughter now dying down.

“So Parker,” I started, turning over so that I was looking at him. “What brings you around at this hour?” He let out a sigh, but didn’t respond. This didn’t sit right with me, so I sat up to look at him in the face. He was staring at the ceiling, unbothered by my staring. “Hey, whats up?” This time I was more serious, hoping that that would pry an answer out of him. 

He closed his eyes and scrunched up his face “I- don't want to say, its…” He trailed off for a moment, as if trying to stall his next words. “Embarrassing,” 

I rolled my eyes and now sat fully up, “Peter it’s ok, you can tell me. I wont judge, I promise.” He opened his eyes slightly to look at me. I was smiling, hoping that that might help ease the embarrassment. He looked back up at the ceiling, “I… had a nightmare,” he breathed out and was now covering his face to hide his embarrassment. I didn’t understand. Everyone gets nightmares sometimes. It was completely normal. 

“Well Peter, everyone gets nightmares sometimes--I don’t really think you should be embarrassed about that. But, if it would help, you can tell me what happened.” I felt like however silly his reasons were, I wanted to to be supportive of my friend. 

“That's the thing” he started. This time he sat up and turned so that we were eye to eye. “I had a nightmare about you.” The face I was making must have scared him, because he hastily continued, “I-I mean like you are ok now so it's fine, but it was pretty horrific. I remember I was umm- running, because I heard you yelling for me. It was like running through a maze, but when I finally found you, you were…” He stopped. His eyes were turning red and you could tell it was becoming harder for him to finish, But he carried on. “You were lying on the ground, and like, half your face and your arm were all burnt up like him like Mr.-” He couldn’t finish as he wiped away some tears that were falling from his face. I didn't need him to finish however, and ended up wrapping ghim in a hug. I felt him sniffle as he leaned his head down into my shoulder, wrapping his arms around me. It felt nice knowing that I could be there for him. I heard his breath steady as he continued. “It j-just felt so real and now I feel like I can never close my eyes again without seeing your body-” He couldn’t finish.

I thought for a moment, trying to figure out a way to calm Peter down. I pulled back from the hug and told Peter to lie down. “Come on Peter, lets get some sleep,” I moved to turn the lights out, then found my way next to a sniffling Peter. “You know that will never happen, I can promise you that,” I whispered. “I know you are still upset about Mr. Stark, and I know you have been through a lot. I need you to know that you still have so many people here to help you stick out the pain. You’ve got May, Ned, MJ…” I trailed off, getting lost in my thoughts. 

I heard Peter speak up quietly, “You?”

I smiled at the thought of Peter thinking about me “Yes Peter, obviously me. Anytime you have another nightmare, my window is open.” I looked at him through the darkness, and I could tell he was looking down at me. “Looks like you're stuck with me” 

I could tell the gap between us was thin. I could feel his breath on me. I wanted so badly to move up and kiss him, but he did that for me. Our lips met and all of my thoughts went out the window as I kissed him back. May I just say. Holy Fuck. I had only dreamed of kissing Peter and now… Jesus Christ. His lips were chapped slightly, but soft nonetheless. You couldn’t even tell it was one of the first kisses Peter had ever had, but boy ‘o’ boy was it his favorite.

It ended seconds after. As we both pulled back, the looks of surprise and bliss were written all over our faces. Anyone who had walked into the room at that moment could clearly tell what had happened. Peter leaned back and stared at the ceiling in awe “Holy shit. That was...” It was almost as if he was at a loss for words. 

“Overdue.” I finished his thought for him and let out a small laugh, “guess you really are stuck with me now huh?”

If you had told me at the beginning of the night that I would be locking lips with Peter Parker, aka my longtime crush, aka Spiderman, I would have laughed in your face, but now… 

 He turned and wrapped me in his arms. “I don’t think I’ll have trouble getting to sleep tonight, now that I’m here, with you.” I felt his chin rest on the top of my head, and I took this chance to snake my arms around him, resetting my head on his chest. We sat in silence, listening to each other breathe for quite some time. I felt his chest vibrate as he hummed quietly “This is great.” his voice was low, like he was on the verge of falling asleep. This was the understatement of the year. If heaven were a feeling, this would be it.  I felt my eyelids getting heavier and heavier, and soon enough Peter's heartbeat had lulled me to sleep. He had fallen asleep soon after. The thoughts of him coming through my window more regularly, not to mention the smell of me floating through the room put his mind at ease. I felt like I was the luckiest person in the world.

  ✤✤✤  ✤✤✤  ✤✤✤  ✤✤✤  ✤✤✤  ✤✤✤  ✤✤✤  ✤✤✤  ✤✤✤  ✤✤✤  ✤✤✤  

a/n: I hope yall liked the read! lmk what you thought about it ;0

[gumnut-logic]

Callisto (Voyage - Bit 1)

Prologue Incident - Bit 1 | Bit 2 Fallout - Bit 1 | Bit 2 | Bit 3 Voyage - Bit 1

Here is the beginning of Chapter Two :D I have completed this chapter so I’m a few thousand words ahead of this posting - this fic is now 12,000 words long :D

As always, many thanks to @tsarinatorment​ @scribbles97​ and @janetm74​ for all the read throughs, help and amazing support (heh, this part was written twice and nearly a third time just trying to get it right - I don’t do that very often at all - but it needed it. Thank you to these three for keeping me on the straight and narrow)

A special thanks also goes to my wonderful physicist, @onereyofstarlight​ who has spent quite some time on this with me also - she’s my John! Literally. We defined the function of the T-drive, discovered what the ‘T’ stands for, and then helped John invent a communications relay network. Yay for a geeking out in the pursuit of logical fiction :D

Anyways, I hope you enjoy this bit. There is plenty more to come :D

-o-o-o-

“Airframe?”

Virgil nudged his board. “Three and Five secure. We are go.”

His eldest brother looked away, back towards Alan, and by extension, their father on the astronaut’s far side.

Dad did not look back.

Next to Virgil, Gordon shifted in his seat.

Internally, Virgil sighed. The tension in the cockpit was so thick, every hair on his body was standing at attention.

Even Uncle Lee was silent, sitting behind their father. Virgil was pretty sure that was a first.

How the astronaut had found out about the situation, Virgil didn’t know. He could ask John, but to be honest, he wasn’t sure he wanted to know.

Virgil had been in the process of loading up Three when the call had come in. Scott had been called ‘Simon’ three times, the good old ‘Vinnie’ popped up at least once, but Alan had received an ‘Allie’ and that had been promising at first…until it proved short for Albert.

Alan had just shrugged and, with a tight-lipped nod from their father, had advised that they would be picking up their Uncle from Cape Canaveral within the half hour.

Scott hadn’t said a thing.

Virgil added extra supplies for the extra body and hadn’t commented either.

He did, however, notice Dad’s shoulders relaxing just a little. Virgil wasn’t sure if that was a good thing or a bad thing.

“Propulsion?” Scott’s voice was all mechanical command. No inflection or emotion.

Michael, dressed in a black work suit, didn’t react. “All systems green. T-Drive ready.”

The situation with the former Mechanic was a grey area worth every grey hair it created. Scott did not like the man. Hell, Virgil was wary as all hell. He couldn’t help but remember the smoke, the red lights and the thought that perhaps he was giving his life in an attempt to save his Thunderbird as she fell from the sky.

But Brains trusted him. Swore he was genuine, that he had been under the influence of the Hood the entire time.

But Virgil still had nightmares about watching his brother’s ‘bird being torn in two.

There were many questions.

And so much pain.

But at the core of it, they needed the man’s genius. An arrangement was made with the GDF and ‘Michael’, as he had chosen to be known as, now worked under supervision with International Rescue. Almost bonded in servitude to atone for everything he had done. And apparently, he went willingly.

Kayo had so many monitoring devices on the man, he couldn’t pee by himself.

“Helm?” Blue pierced the air and targeted the youngest Tracy.

Alan didn’t flinch, but he did sit straighter.

“Navigation feed locked in. First drop point noted and programmed. Engines prepped and ready. We are go for orbital exit.”

Virgil steeled himself. He hated this part. It turned his head and his insides out. The first time they had engaged the T-drive engines it was a miracle he hadn’t puked all over himself. The second time, at least he had warning, but it hadn’t been much better.

Hopefully these jumps, no more than a second or two in each instance, would be easier. It was an attempt at more precise navigation. Callisto was comparatively closer than the Oort cloud - an odd combination of too far by ion engine and too short by lightspeed engine. So, for efficiency, they were compromising and using a combination. Lightspeed hop, followed by a trajectory change via ion thruster, followed by another hop, the sequence repeating several times. Each time they paused they were to drop a communications buoy, firming up the network with Earth and giving them almost real-time capability.

This was all John and complex, but they would get the Excel to Callisto in less than a day.

Scott’s voice was as strong and as firm as it had been the last time they had made a light speed jump.

“On my mark...”

“5...”

“4...” The countdown was a reassuring familiarity.

“3...”

“2...” Virgil braced himself.

“1...” Alan’s grip tightened.

“Mark!”

Alan moved.

The ship trembled and the world swam.

A blink and everything steadied again.

Alan’s voice was sharp. “First jump complete.” He rattled off numbers as Virgil tried to keep his insides on the inside.

“I am so not a fan of that.” Gordon beside him was clutching at his stomach.

Virgil only grunted.

“Everyone okay?” Scott sounded far too chipper.

But there were a series of FABs bouncing around the cockpit. Virgil resorted to grunting again.

That earned him an extra long glare from his brother, but Virgil waved it away. Besides, John wasn’t communicating any better, his space brother still had his face in his hands.

“That was one hell of a stomach churner. Put my insides in through a washing cycle there, Albert.”

The image Virgil managed off that statement had his insides flipping again.

Uncle Lee was also far too cheerful.

“How many more times do we have to do that?” Gordon was whining.

“Four.” Alan was as chipper as Scott. Probably a good thing since he was the pilot and all.

“Ugh, I should have brought a bucket.”

It was a redundant statement as a bucket required gravity to work. The medic in him flared. “If the nausea becomes an issue, you know what to do.”

That earned him another grunt.

“Keep it together, guys. Alan, ion burn for direction change and buoy drop.” Scott was ever the Commander.

“Already on it! Next jump in thirty-five minutes.”

Far too chipper.

But they were in normal space and that gave them the freedom to move about. Virgil planned to take full advantage.

“Virgil? A word?” It was a question, but his father’s tone obviously expected a positive response.

He sighed to himself, so much for the planned snack. “Yeah, Dad.” He didn’t miss Scott’s reflex glance in both of their directions.

Their father unbuckled and floated toward the back of the cockpit. Virgil had had quite a say in the redesign and the seven stripes of colour down the length of the cabin broke up the ivory he had demanded be plastered on the walls to brighten up the place.

Seven strips of colour, one for each brother, sister and now their father.

The suit his Dad wore today barely resembled the one he had been stranded in. The most dramatic difference was his baldric. Once the silver-grey of command, he had relinquished that to Scott.

Or so they had thought.

Virgil swallowed as he clambered out of his seat, exercising his space legs a little as he re-familiarised himself with the environment.

Dad’s baldric was now a pale gold and consequently, there was a pale gold stripe to match running the length of the cockpit...right next to the silver-grey of Scott’s baldric.

Virgil dropped a hand to Gordon’s shoulder as the fish muttered about his stomach again.

“Hey, we have anti-nausea if you need it.”

Gordon grunted.

“Virgil?” Dad was holding the door to the residential section of the ship.

“Coming.” It was a mutter under his breath that had Gordon glancing up at him, frowning.

A gentle squeeze of his little brother’s shoulder and Virgil pushed off after his father.

Dad led him down the main hallway to...the infirmary? “Dad, what?”

“I need to check you over.”

“Scott already did.”

“I know. Just humour me, please.”

Virgil blinked and pressed his lips together before following his father through the door to the tiny medbay. Scott was definitely a Dad clone in many ways.

The difference was that Scott had checked on him before they left and would have grounded his ass if he found anything wrong. Whereas Dad had waited until now?

The mandatory scanner appeared in his father’s hand and yellow light flickered over Virgil’s arm and torso. A moment as grey eyes examined the readouts.

“I had to make sure.” His father swallowed. “And I wanted to apologise.”

Virgil blinked again. “Uh, sorry?”

Dad put the scanner away and leant back against the bed in the middle of the tiny room. “I want you to understand why I need to do this.”

Virgil’s lips tightened, but he held back his response. He wasn’t really the one who needed the apology.

His father held up his hands as if to fend off what Virgil was thinking. “I know it is a risk, but it is one I’m willing to take.”

“This is not just about you, Dad.”

“I know. Please hear me out.”

Virgil swallowed down his instinctive defensiveness and waited.

“I have spent the last two years watching all of you risk your lives every day. Unable to help.”

“You help, Dad.”

His father held up a hand. “Not enough.”

“You’ve done enough. You made the ultimate sacrifice.”

“This is not the end of my life, Virgil!” It was both a yell and a plea.

Frozen mid-thought, Virgil just stared.

Dad turned away, pulling against the bed to shift himself. “I’m not finished. I owe Berry and Ju and this is my chance to pay.”

“To pay for what? What could be worth your life, Dad? What could be worth putting Scott through all this?”

“Scott? Why is everyone so defensive of Scott. This has nothing to do with him.”

“It has everything to do with him!” It was Virgil’s turn to get loud. For a moment, he forgot he was in space and his frustrated movement set him on a gentle spin. He had to grab a cabinet to right himself. “It has everything to do with all of us.”

His father’s hands were placating as he held them out. “I know you boys sacrificed a lot and I will be forever grateful-“

“You don’t know, Dad.”

“What?”

“Because we haven’t told you how close everything came to collapse. How close we were to losing Scott.”

Dad’s eyes widened. “Virgil-“

“No, you don’t get to gamble on this! I can’t watch it happen all over again. It will kill him.” He wasn’t too sure he had the strength himself either. “You were home. You were safe. You could be Dad again. Why on Earth would you ever want to be anything else after all those years? All those times you chose space, or the business or International Rescue over us. You’re doing it again. Why can’t family be the most important on your list of things, Dad? Just for once?”

It was more than he had intended to say. It bared him to his father’s scrutiny, to the sensitive parts of himself that Dad had never quite understood. His throat grew tight and he struggled to hold it together.

Dad reached out a hand and gently gripped Virgil’s shoulder. “I am who I am, Virgil. I can’t change that.”

There was a knock at the door. “Virgil, are you okay in there?”

Scott.

Virgil closed his eyes.

“He’s fine, Scott.” Dad’s voice was firm.

The door opened. Blue ice combed the room. “Virgil, Michael needs you to check the aft sensor array. He’s getting an anomalous reading.”

Virgil frowned. “Does he think there’s a fault?”

“That’s why he needs you to check it out.” Sharp and defying objection.

And obviously a route to removing Virgil from the room.

Shit.

He glared at Scott, but Scott’s expression was more tired than inflammatory. “Have you eaten?”

“Virgil…”

“I’m going, if you’re going.” Brother-speak for ‘I’m only doing as you say if you do as I say and there is no way I’m leaving you alone with Dad right now’.

Blue flickered as the message was received. “Fine. Check in with Michael and I will see you in the mess hall asap.” Scott pushed off from the door frame and disappeared down the corridor without another word.

And no acknowledgement that their father even existed.

God, this was hard.

“Sorry, Dad, I have to go.” Okay, there was some relief in that, even if he was ashamed to admit it.

The man grunted and squeezed his shoulder before letting go. “We all have our duty.”

Virgil pushed off the bed towards the door, turning for a just a moment to look back at his father. But Dad was staring at nothing, simply floating beside the bed apparently lost in thought.

Virgil’s throat tightened and he opened his mouth.

But nothing came out.

Now more sad than angry, Virgil pushed through the door and left.

After all, he had his duty.

-o-o-o-

Next

[mydisasteracademia]

SFW Alphabet: Enji Todoroki

Before you start, I know, I know. For this one, I’m pretending that he and Rei are divorced (which is frankly what they need and deserve), and he’s the Number One. Please don’t yell at me about how much he doesn’t deserve anything nice.

A = Affection (How affectionate are they? How do they show affection?)

Enji is very awkward with his affection, especially to you. Quick little hugs, head pats, maybe even a pat on the shoulder. He’s trying not to be overbearing, but he hasn’t even dated before (his engagement to Rei doesn’t count), and he hasn’t shown romantic affection since his first two children were born.

B = Best friend (What would they be like as a best friend? How would the friendship start?)

More willing to be around you, less likely to get annoyed at your antics. You likely became friends after you recognized him on the street and asked for an autograph for a family member, he accidentally broke your only pen, and you just met for coffee to start over.

C = Cuddles (Do they like to cuddle? How would they cuddle?)

When you’re alone together and you sidle up to him, he enjoys cuddling. You’re so small in comparison that he just enjoys curling up to you, but only if you initiate. He doesn’t want to overstep in his first relationship as a single man again.

D = Domestic (Do they want to settle down? How are they at cooking and cleaning?)

He can cook and clean well enough. Even though I imagine him with hired help up until he’s divorced, he knows how to function by himself, especially now that the kids are gone. He’s afraid of settling down again, just because his past still haunts him too much.

E = Ending (If they had to break up with their partner, how would they do it?)

Oh, it would kill him to do it. But maybe he’d get too paranoid if you being targeted just to get to him, and he’d sit you down and discuss breaking up for now. He’s not out to break your heart; he wants his loved ones safe. He spends a lot of time avoiding his feelings in the days and weeks following.

F = Fiancé(e) (How do they feel about commitment? How quick would they want to get married?)

Very afraid of commitment again. After the disaster that was his first marriage, even the thought of having children is enough to have him run for the hills. It takes a lot of time and healing for him to even consider marrying someone.

G = Gentle (How gentle are they, both physically and emotionally?)

He tried to be gentle with you, but sometimes his brash personality can seep out. He feels awful every time it happens and tries to make it up to you, but for the most part, he’s been successful at being careful. His touches are light, as if you were made of glass.

H = Hugs (Do they like hugs? How often do they do it? What are their hugs like?)

He appreciates hugs from certain people. He enjoys when his daughter hugs him, and it makes his day when Shouto hugs him. He doesn’t initiate them with you, waiting for you to make a move. As soon as you hug him, though, his arms are wrapping around you like a big, warm, muscley blanket.

I = I love you (How fast do they say the L-word?)

It happens during a villain attack in your first year of friendship, when he realizes he’s both in love with and terrified of losing you. As soon as you’re safe he’s hugging you tight, saying “Don’t scare me like that, I love you”.

J = Jealousy (How jealous do they get? What do they do when they’re jealous?)

He can get jealous easily, especially when you’re around people like Toshinori. He knows you can do so much better than him, and some part of him wants to let you go free, but then he realizes he doesn’t want you to leave.

K = Kisses (What are their kisses like? Where do they like to kiss you? Where do they like to be kissed?)

His kisses are shy, yet passionate, and he often goes for your forehead. He likes it when you kiss his face, especially when you tenderly kiss his scar.

L = Little ones (How are they around children?)

He’s, admittedly, not as good around children. Not unless it involves training in some way. He just doesn’t have the patience or endurance to keep up with them these days.

M = Morning (How are mornings spent with them?)

He gets up earlier than you do, due to his work as a pro. He might wake you up to eat breakfast with him, but otherwise he leaves you a note and a plate of food, detailing when he thinks he’ll be back.

N = Night (How are nights spent with them?)

Usually tries to make it for dinner, but always ends up collapsing into bed with you, just holding you close.

O = Open (When would they start revealing things about themselves? Do they say everything all at once or wait a while to reveal things slowly?)

He’s hesitant at first, given that he doesn’t want you to run off the minute you learn of his past as an abuser. It takes a lot of mutual trust before he can really open up to you, and even then he worries you’ll leave him. He starts off by peppering little things about his kids here and there, maybe some things he likes.

P = Patience (How easily angered are they?)

This is Enji we’re discussing. Of course he’s got a temper. He tries to keep his cool these days (trust me, he was way worse before as his family can attest to), but now he’s got a better handle on his temper. He still gets irritated easily, but he doesn’t rage like he used to. Not unless he’s facing a villain.

Q = Quizzes (How much would they remember about you? Do they remember every little detail you mention in passing, or do they kind of forget everything?)

He remembers what he can. As we’ve seen, he has a pretty good memory about little things (think Rei’s flower), so if you tell him you like or dislike something, he’s going to remember it.

R = Remember (What is their favorite moment in your relationship?)

Honestly, his favorite moment was when he first discussed his past with you. You’d cried as he told you of the horrible things he did and what he was doing to atone for it, and when you said you’d support him in his path to redemption, it really touched his heart.

S = Security (How protective are they? How would they protect you? How would they like to be protected?)

Extremely protective, to the point where he would voluntarily end the relationship if it meant you were safe (though that’s largely rooted in his own insecurities). But sometimes he just wants someone to hold him and reassure him too.

T = Try (How much effort would they put into dates, anniversaries, gifts, everyday tasks?)

He puts everything he has into your relationship. Tries to make time for dates, gives you breakfast in bed on your birthday, every once in a while giving you little trinkets... he’s also used to doing chores on his own, so don’t be surprised if he does most of the work around the house now that it’s just him.

U = Ugly (What would be some bad habits of theirs?)

Oh geez, where to start? He’s still got a temper that tends to flare up on bad days. If he gets too deep into his own self-loathing he’ll go a few days without even seeing you, instead sleeping at the agency and doing work from there. Real touchy about the subject of kids/marriage/his past and will stubbornly refuse to talk about it, sometimes to the point of fighting. Too prideful to admit his misdeeds sometimes. Drinks in the evenings to numb some of the pain. Spends way too much time in the gym and often neglects his own health.

V = Vanity (How concerned are they with their looks?)

He does what needs to be done. Trims stubble, makes sure his hair is combed, takes extra care with his clothing... he wants to keep up the facade that he’s got everything together in public. When he’s alone, shirtless and sweatpants for days babey.

W = Whole (Would they feel incomplete without you?)

Depends on how far in the relationship you are. In the beginning, he’d be sad, but he would learn to push the pain down. Later on, though, he wouldn’t want you to leave. He likely wouldn’t get into another relationship after you, focusing instead on his work.

X = Xtra (A random headcanon for them.)

I mean, I know this is already kinda canon, but he is a very Proud Dad. In order to make up for all that he missed, he likes to keep track of his kids’ accomplishments and if you get him drunk enough he melts into this puddle of pride as he boasts about how great they’ve become. Has about dozen framed pictures of his family (and two of just Rei, one when she was discharged from the hospital and one on the day the divorce was finalized) in his bedroom and office that he looks at whenever he’s lonely.

Y = Yuck (What are some things they wouldn’t like, either in general or in a partner?)

Anyone not willing to keep him in check. That would be the big one. Anyone too judgmental and/or just plain mean. Anyone who likes to poke at his insecurities just to watch him explode. Especially not anyone who gushes about other heroes all the time (especially not Toshinori).

Z = Zzz (What is a sleep habits of theirs?)

He tries to keep a fairly-regular sleep schedule. He usually ends up going to bed fairly late and waking up early. Sometimes if he gets a chance to take a break during the day he’ll nap depending on how exhausting it’s been.

[saffronwritings]

C L U M S Y | S H I N S O U PT.3

S H I N S O U | P A R T  T H R E E (Final)

I let you down I've been clumsy with your heart again

C L U M Y  M A S T E R L I S T

Word Count: 3.7k

A/N: This started off shorter and then I redid one of the segments and welp here we are at 4.3k words. Oops! It’s not favoritism I promise. This is the “final” part to Shinsou’s CLUMSY series! I really hope you all enjoy! I’ll make a post asking what you all want to see next! :) 

Denki couldn’t remember what time Shinsou told him to meet up with him after his training with Aizawa-sensei, so he figured he was going to just sit outside of the gym until he saw his purple haired friend exit the locker rooms. It had become almost routine for the two to have after school hangouts, mainly so Shinsou could relax after a long day. Kaminari helped fill the void that he felt without being able to see you. Though, Shinsou was guilty that it had distracted him from talking to you on occasion. While Kaminari was sporadic and chaotic, it helped ease the stress that Shinsou was constantly under.

 However, Kaminari was surprised when he noticed the gym door was left wide open. Usually when he had ventured over to this part of UA, he would notice that the doors were closed. A privacy thing so that the students didn’t feel pressured or on-lookers wouldn’t intimate the said student. Had Aizawa-sensei cancelled his practice with Shinsou for the day? He was acting very strange the entire course of the day. He was extra grumpy and even before coming to check in on his friend, he had particularly felt bad for Shinsou having to deal with his sensei’s foul mood.  

 Curiosity got the better of the blonde boy, Denki decided to peek inside the small private gym, the ones teachers used to mentor students in, only to see Shinsou standing against a wall with his face pale and expression shocked. Shinsou had looked like he had either seen a ghost or had been told someone close to him had died. This immediately made the blonde worry for his new friend.  He had looked around cautiously to see if Aizawa was still in the room. When it showed that it was only the two boys just sitting in absolute silence, that is when Kaminari decided to speak up to figure out what was going on.  “Oi Shinsou, is everything-” The blonde started to say before Shinsou let out a scream of frustration. It reverberated a chill down Kami’s spine, making him flinch back.  

Suddenly gym equipment started to fly across the room in haphazardly ways. His screams and shouts continued while he was heaving equipment left and right. “I’VE WORKED SO HARD.” Shinsou shouted in his fit of rage. “I HAVE WATCHED UNWORTHY STUDENTS SIT IN LUXURY.” Kaminari sat in a state of shock, watching his new friend seemingly lose his mind. He wanted to go and comfort his friend, but he was afraid he was going to lash out on him as well. He opted to just let him get all of his emotions out, even if it wasn’t in a healthy manner. “I PUSHED SO MANY PEOPLE AWAY FOR A SLIVER OF A CHANCE TO PROVE MYSELF.” He spewed again, not noticing the tears starting to stream down his face. He had thrown everything within a few feet radius as hard as he could across the smaller gym room. 

He had looked over to Kaminari who was just standing there awkwardly, watching him, judging him. However, Shinsou was so out of breath he wasn’t sure if he even had any energy left to yell at the blonde for looking at him with such pity in his eyes. “I don’t know what’s going on, dude, but maybe you should take a breather before you hurt yourself.” Kaminari spoke cautiously, trying to not provoke Shinsou further. “You don’t get to tell me when to calm down! You don’t understand, you’ve had the privilege to just BE in the hero course!” Shinsou shouted at him, his eyes filled with both tears and rage. “But, you’re doing so well with your training! You were just talking to the support class to design your new gear!” Kaminari still tried to direct the conversation in a positive manner. 

The two had just discussed how he was getting one of the girls in the support class to design a vocal chord changing mask. Kaminari was super blown away with the idea of being able to change voices in order to trick their opponents. While Shinsou might have lacked the psychical strength, he was always good at diverting and making a plan for success. “It doesn’t even matter now! Don’t you get it deadbolt!? I not only lost my shot at joining the hero course but I also lost the girl I loved by pushing her away for this opportunity” Shinsou’s voice strained out, it being raspy from screaming and shouting. 

The blonde’s eyes widened in shock, realizing the situation at hand in front of him. He was watching Shinsou have a breakdown because for some reason, he had lost his mentor-ship with Aizawa. “What? What happened? You were doing great with your training!” Denki had pointed out making Shinsou flinch in embarrassment from those words. “Don’t you think I know that?!” The purple haired boy cried, clutching his chest in desperate attempts to not let his heart fail him now. Kaminari had also picked up on his specific wording, the girl he loved. Had he gotten into a fight with you the night before? As far as he was concerned, the two of you were fine. You guys had plans to meet up after practice the prior day. 

“Can’t you just fix all of this then?” Kaminari’s comment made Shinsou turn very angrily towards him. “If I could, do you think I would make this big of a mess and yell so loudly? Do you think I would have gone into a fit of rage, destroying the gym if i could just FIX it? I can’t, you dumbass! I screwed up big time!” Shinsou cried out more, finally admitting his defeat. His knees crashed to the ground and he fell over onto his hands. He couldn’t stop himself from breaking down completely in front of Kaminari. 

Kaminari knelt down next to him, placing a gentle hand onto the boy's back. Shinsou wouldn’t have noticed though, his entire body felt numb. He felt like he was plunging into a sea of darkness, swarmed with all his insecurities and doubts that he was ever good enough in the first place for such opportunities. With each gasp of air he took, he could feel himself drowning further into the waters that flowed over him like a flooding hurricane. Everything he worked for, everything he was aiming for was now just stripped from him.

You always kept him afloat with positive words that always helped him breach the waters that tempted to drown him. Like a ripping current he was being dragged under so quickly it was hard to breath. Kaminari was full of panic himself, watching Shinsou progress in his panic attack without fully knowing what to do. He wasn’t like Kirishima who could easily bring comfort to those in states like this. The blonde was tempted to go get help from one of his other friends but he was afraid of leaving Shinsou alone. 

What had he done that had gotten him kicked from the mentoring program and had made him lose you?

…

“Stop right there, Shota.” Hizashi’s voice rang from down the hallway of the teacher’s lounge. Aizawa was still steaming with fury that he hadn’t noticed how far away from the training gyms he was. He came to a halt to see the older blonde glaring at him. “You took that way too far. I don’t know the extent of what your daughter said on the phone, but hurting Shinsou that badly wasn’t justified.” He started spewing, getting angrier through his sentence. Aizawa narrowed his eyes at his friend. “He broke her heart.” The tired teacher said through gritted teeth. “You didn’t hear how upset she was over the phone. I’ve heard her get like that once and that was after the USJ incident with the league of villains.”

“Teenagers go through breakups and fights all the time.” Hizashi tried to reason with him. “You don’t have a daughter, Hizashi.” Aizawa quickly countered. “You wouldn’t know what it’s like to hear your son or daughter call to you for help, sounding like they barely slept the night before.” Shota knew he was going way over the top, but if there was anything he would do, it was for the sake of his daughter.

His daughter wasn’t a planned idea, but there was nothing on the planet that Aizawa could love more. There was a reason he had made living arrangements and let little know about his daughter. The last thing he needed was for the league of villains to find out about you and to attempt to take you away from him. “No, but I know that you just crushed every hope that kid had for joining the hero course. Instead of punishing the poor kid who hasn’t been given a chance since he got here, why not help him out?” Hizashi started to try and reason with him.

“Help him out? After he hurt my daughter?” Aizawa growled through his gritted teeth. He could feel the headache forming in his temples from the day. He spent it so angrily, so filled to the brim with frustration. It was like he was getting hit multiple times in the chest with blow after blow. “You don’t even know what happened between the two! For all you know it could have been a misunderstanding. The last thing you want is for there to be no hope for your daughter to be able to make things up with the boy because you scarred him.” 

For once, Hizashi had a really good point. As much as it pained him to agree with the obnoxious blonde, he knew he was right. “I’m sure your daughter would appreciate the effort set forth by you.” He continued to push, making a groan leave Aizawa’s throat. “Fine, fine. If it will get you off my back, and if you really think this is a good idea, then I’ll go make things right. If not, I will not hesitate to hang you over a pool of sharks.” Aizawa threatened, making Hizashi smile widely at him. 

Hizashi treaded lightly behind Aizawa to make sure he would stay true to his word. The last thing he needed was for the man to slump over and fall asleep before missing his chance to fix things with Shinsou. He didn’t want to tell Aizawa, because he knew it would make him feel even worse about the situation, but he knew Shinsou had a soft spot for Eraserhead. The way the kid watched in admiration whenever he would explain something to the student said volumes. 

Aizawa was not happy about having to be the one to confront the boy who broke his daughter’s heart. Damn that loud mouthed Hizashi for bringing his daughter into the mix. He knew he was right but that didn’t make him any less happy about the situation. In no time flat he made it back to the gym only to notice that things were strewn about. Weights were all over the place, the sparring matt was upright against a wall instead of on the ground. He noticed Kaminari next to Shinsou, kneeled over and rubbed circles into Hitoshi’s back. He almost felt bad when he heard the soft sobbing that came from the hunched over boy. Until he took into account what he had done to his daughter.

Aizawa crossed the room and pointed for Denki to leave. The electric blonde did not hesitate to question his teacher’s instruction and left the gym quickly. Aizawa squatted down to Shinsou’s level and put a hand on his back. “Get up, kid.” He said in a husky voice, before standing up. Shinsou’s eyes shot open and his head shot up to look at him. Surprise and confusion flooded his face as he wasn’t sure why the teacher of class 1-A had come back to him. 

“Kaminari, if you don’t scram from eavesdropping from around the corner I will not hesitate to flunk you on your next upcoming exam.” Aizawa shouted loud enough so that his lingering student could hear. Both Aizawa and Shinsou heard shoes scuttling away from the door and down the hallway. He was about to tell Hizashi the same thing, but Shinsou had interrupted his thought process by saying, “Why did you come back?” Shota had noted his tone was defeated, and almost filled with hopelessness. 

“I was too harsh, I was overcome with my own emotions of protecting my daughter and lashed it out on you. You are a bright student and one that deserves a second shot.” Aizawa started to explain, rubbing the back of his neck. “Why didn’t you tell me Y/N was your daughter? I had been dating her for well over a year. You had to know what you were signing up for when taking me on as my mentor.” Shinsou questioned quickly, obviously still very confused from the situation. 

“I wanted to make you a hero good enough to protect her.” Aizawa admitted, shaking his head at his own thoughts. “I don’t know what you said to her to make her so upset she called me crying, but you need to fix it. However, being my daughter, she’s a stubborn headed mess. If I personally don’t help you, you may not have a shot of fixing it.” Shinsou’s eyes lit up with just a tad bit of hope. “You’re helping me?” Shinsou’s voice came out in a whisper. “In this regard, yes. If you think I’m going to be cleaning your mess here, you are sorely mistaken.” Aizawa said, however, Shinsou could hear a bit of playfulness in his tone.

…

You had been tempted to try and communicate with Shinsou after the blow-up the two of you had. However, judging on the last text you sent him, he had your number blocked. Even if he had unblocked your number, wouldn’t he have tried to reach out and make things better? This wasn’t the first quarrel the two of you had, obviously not to this degree. It had never gone on this long. The realization dawned on you the night before you were supposed to get together with your father, that maybe Shinsou was serious about not wanting you around while he went through his training. 

It didn’t help lessen the blow in the slightest bit. It felt like someone was stepping on your chest and every time you felt like maybe you had some semblance of a grasp on your own emotions, the foot would step down harder. You felt crippled without Shinsou in your life. Your phone felt like it had less purpose, even if you had texted a few of your other friends to attempt to try and fill in the void that Shinsou had left. You had missed the late night texts, staying up video calling with him and seeing the sleep slip further from his eyes during his studies. Your grades this past week alone had slipped quite quickly as you were unable to focus on a single word a teacher was saying. 

Your zombielike state had concerned not only your teachers, your classmates, but also your mother. While you tried to let it seem like it wasn’t bothering you that you had lost your best friend, you knew that your mother knew you better than that. What was worse was that she was probably keeping your father up to date on the current situation. You hadn’t informed either of your parents the details of your breakup with Hitoshi, and you hadn’t planned on it. The last thing you or your family needed was your father in jail for attempting to murder a minor. 

When the weekend came around, you were half-tempted to cancel on your plans with your father. You wanted nothing more than to accept the warm embrace your bed was giving you. While it was dragging you further into your pit of despair it was at least comforting. When your phone buzzed on your nightstand you weighed the options of just going back to sleep, you knew your father was persistent and would call over and over until you woke up. For a man who was tired all the time, he didn’t understand why teenagers sleep so much over weekend breaks. Groaning, you gathered all your strength to sit up in your bed and reach over to answer your phone. 

“We are still on for the movies today, right kiddo?”  Your father’s voice chimed not even a second after you had picked up the phone. “I was actually thinking of maybe a rain check?” You tried to push, but you could already feel him rolling his eyes on the other side of the phone. “I know you being a teenager and you probably aren’t even out of bed yet, but as far as I’m concerned, it’s not raining.” Sarcasm dripped from his lips and you wanted nothing more than to hang up and turn your phone off. You were in no mood for his antics for the day. 

“I’m just not feeling up to going today, papa.” You whispered after there was silence between the two. “I figured you would feel that way. Your mother has mentioned how you have been practically among the living dead this last week.” He recounted, making you curse under your breath for knowing your mother all too well. You had hoped that maybe, just this once she was going to keep things to herself. You should have known better. “I already bought the tickets ahead of time, and I’m not taking Hizashi or your mother.” Your father warned.

“Fine, I’ll get ready. I’ll meet you at the train station?” You sighed in defeat, knowing you would not win this battle. “Sounds good to me.” He said, before both of you hung up your phones. 

…

You stood at the entrance of the train station, checking your phone a few times to make sure that your dad hadn’t texted you that he was running late. You had attempted to call him twice already and he hadn’t picked up on either attempt. A sigh escaped your lips, wishing that you had just stood your ground on staying home and sleeping the weekend away. “Y/N?” If you hadn’t been frozen in place before, the voice you had memorized locked your feet into place. Suddenly your heart was racing immensely too fast and the wind felt like it was knocked clean out of your lungs. 

It wasn’t even fair, the way fate had played out for you this day. Not only did you dress in just leggings and a baggy hoodie, you had chosen a hoodie that you only now registered had belonged to Shinsou. Cursing your father for following through with your request for father daughter time, you finally looked up at the purple haired boy who seemed almost sheepish. He was wearing that cursed bomber jacket that you always loved on him, a simple t shirt and a pair of baggy jeans. In other words, he at least looked a million times more decent than you had. Not to mention your hair was thrown haphazardly into a messy bun and god knows you had dark circles developing under your eyes with your lack of sleep you had gotten last week. 

“You know out of the two of us for once I think you win in the department of needing some extra weekend sleep.” Shinsou tried to ease himself into conversation with you. The tension in the air was so thick that you were sure that you were suffocating on it. You had so many questions and so many emotions flooding you at once. Your mind was swirling like you were stuck on a teacup ride that you were trapped on. When Shinsou noticed your lack of response to his statement, he returned back to his awkward state of trying to figure out how to make things go back to normal. 

Anything would be better than this killer silence. He hated that it looked like you hadn’t slept in over a week and hated it even more than he was the one that caused you to be like this. His guilt was suffocating him for ever causing you this much pain for being so selfish. He wanted nothing more than to pull you into his arms and to soothe your pains away. If it hadn’t been for Aizawa he wouldn’t have even been here. He would still be in his dorm, beating himself up for ever letting this distance drift you two so far apart. 

“If we don’t hurry, we are going to miss our movie.” Shinsou settled on saying, before turning to walk towards the direction of the movie theater. You whipped your head up so fast in confusion, trying to stammer out a sentence that made any sense. “Wha- I mean I’m here to meet with my dad.” You finally uttered, grabbing on his jacket sleeve to get him to stop walking. Immediately, Shinsou had reverted back to his nervous nature around you like he had once done when the two of you first started dating. 

“Your father gave me the tickets and wanted me to take you out as a way to apologize for my irrational behavior. I should have never snapped at you like I did or acted as immature as I did. I can’t even begin to imagine how it was for you to just be waiting for any kind of affection on my end. I blew you off after an entire month of not seeing you. I probably made it seem like I wasn’t as excited to see you, but I was too focused on my own stupidity to realize what was right in front of me.” He blurted out quickly, stepping closer into your own proximity. “I don’t deserve any kind of forgiveness, but if I didn’t try, I’m pretty sure Aizawa-sensei would personally either kick my ass or expel me.”

You were listening intently until Shinsou had mentioned your father’s last name. “Aizawa-sensei?” You reiterated, raising a shocked eyebrow at him. “Yeah, I was surprised too when I found out. I almost lost my entire chance at getting into the hero course all together because of how pissed he was at me for hurting you.” Shinsou murmured quietly. If your jaw wasn’t open in shock before, it surely was now. Had Shinsou not been standing right in front of you currently you probably would have called your father and chewed him out for his brash behavior. 

However, your heart swelled when thinking about how your father had stepped in to try and fix things between you and Shinsou. It must have been why he was so insistent on you coming to meet with him today. You had to remember to shoot him a text later calling him out on his conniving ways. “I know it’s probably embarrassing, your father stepped in on the situation, but honestly if it wasn’t for him I would have never had the courage to do this.” He said, grabbing your hand to hold in his own without hesitation. His hands were ice cold like they always had been, sending a chill up your spine. 

“I wanted to be a hero that you could be proud of but instead I turned into a selfish loser-” He continued, that is until you grabbed the collar of his jacket and pulled his lips into your own. The chaste kiss made the nervousness melt away from both you and Shinsou. He relaxed into your touch, snaking his arms around your waist. You kissed him like you were afraid you would never get to kiss him again. When you were laying in your bed days after your fight you wanted nothing more than to be in the purple haired boys embrace. You had feared the last time you had seen him, the month before, was the last happy memory of being together. The time he had finally told you he loved you and the last time you two brushed your lips against one another's. 

Tears flowed down your cheeks when the two of you had pulled away, gasping for breaths. You felt dizzy from all the overwhelming emotions you were thrown through but you wouldn’t give anything up for this moment right here. For the boy you loved more than yourself to be in front of you. He cupped your face and wiped the tears that were escaping your eyes with his calloused fingers. “I’m here, and I am not going anywhere this time. I will fight everyday to be the hero you need me to be. I love you more than anything and I hate that I had to destroy something so beautiful to realize it.” Shinsou stated, pressing his forehead against your own. You nodded while sniffling, desperately grasping your hands onto his shirt. 

You threw your arms around his neck and pulled him into your embrace and he welcomed this touch. He ran his hand over your head and rubbed circles into your back. You couldn’t see but Shinsou had also started silently into your hoodie, getting intoxicated by your scent. 

Aizawa smiled to himself to see the two of you entangled in each other’s embrace at the entrance of the train station. People were walking by without having the slightest of a clue as to what was going on between the two. Aizawa took out his phone and snapped a picture of the two of you in your loving embrace. You’d probably scold him for it later, but he knew you would appreciate it later in years. He would chew out Shinsou once again on Monday, before following it up with the news of participating in Class 1-A and Class 1-B’s field training. Then warning him if he ever hurt you again he wouldn’t get off so easy. However, for now, he headed back to Heights Alliance to give you two the space you desperately needed. 

To be continued...? 👀

[Part One] [Part Two]

Taglist:

@uwu-iwanttodie​

[bubblesthemonsterartist]

*cracks knuckles* Clearly I’m going straight for the Blackout. 

ENJOY, FRIENDS. FOR YOU, I THROW IT UNDER THE CUT

Under 1000 Words

take my burdens (and bury them deep) by @thelionshymnal​ Rated M Nothing makes me happier than a fic of my favorite BroTP, especially when Obi is offering to disappear Kiki’s dirty dealings. Content warning for attempted sexual assault and Obi doing what he does best: getting rid of the body.

A Fic That Got You Involved In Fandom

Seven Suitors for Shirayuki by @sabraeal​ Rated T Look. You all are just going to have to accept that there is a certain generation of this fandom that was dragged in, kicking and screaming, by this fic. I wanted to diversify by saying something else managed it, but no. It was the fact that this story was stuck on chapter five for MONTHS that made me vibrate until my own fic fell out. XD

Made You Laugh Out Loud

An Extra Rise Before Dawn by @sabraeal​ Rated G I don’t often worry that I am going to pee from laughing so hard when I’m reading something, but this one definitely does. In one spot in particular. You might be able to guess it. It is simultaneously an incredible sweet and incredibly funny fic that hits all the right notes for me.

Favorite Trope Reversal

Fussing with Firedrakes by @leewritingrecs​ Rated T 1) Dragons. 2) Damsel in distress is no damsel and she is NOT in distress thank you very much 3) Kiki is a DRAGON 4) Obi is cursed, and 5) DID I MENTION D R A G O N S ???

Fic That Made You Friends With the Author

The Wide Florida Bay by @sabraeal​ Rated E I had to think about this because while I read Seven Suitors first, this was the series that made me start sending anons and eventually made me join tumblr where I proceeded to endlessly play the ‘what if’ game with Jen. CLEARLY this is where our friendship was forged.

Action-Packed Fight Scene

Agent, Parts I, II, and III by @infinitelystrangemachinex​ Rated T Like Jen, I was positively torn, because both Andi and Sarah do fight scenes SO WELL, but Agent ultimately won out because there is just something so delightful about Shirayuki flailing and clinging to Obi like a cat that doesn’t want to go in the bath while arrows zip all around them

Edit: Screw it, I’m reccing them both

Republic of Tanbarun by @claudeng80​ Rated T An action adventure series where romance is involved but is by no means the focus. Zen and Obi adventures abound. Politics galore. And some masterfully done slow-motion to quick motion fight scenes that I L O V E D

Gen Fic

Fugue in Three by @infinitelystrangemachinex​ Rated G Ryuu casually destroys Obi and Shirayuki by breathing as they count down the days until he comes of age. Technically this fic has a romantic pairing, but it is by no means the focus of this fic. If you don’t agree, you are welcome to meet me under the Big Oak between the hours of 12 and 4 for a duel.

Missing Scene

Like Brothers Do by @claudeng80​ Rated G Obi is clearly Kiki’s annoying big brother and handles Mitsuhide’s rejection in the best way he knows how. Also read: Mitsuhide gets what’s coming to him. (ง'̀-'́)ง

Canon Divergent

We work at the mall by @kaedix​ Rated T With how many AUs we got floating around this fandom, I was hard pressed to choose a favorite. But there is just something so sweet and wholesome and American teenager about this. It just latches onto you and never lets go. (Also the gang all work at my favorite places in the mall when I was growing up. What’s not to love?)

Steamiest Kiss

Were Hearts Not An Unknown Country by @sabraeal​ Rated T LOOK. SOMEONE was going to have to go dig this out of the rubble of her compilation fics and it might as well be me. Also the birthplace of the much loved AnS fandom practice of solstice kissing.

Contains Your Favorite Headcanon

The road to Clarines is Gravel by @codango​ Rated E Not the focus of the fic as a whole, but like, Torou and Obi are siblings. GALAXY MIND EXPLOSION. I mean, I loved that so much that I wrote a pre-canon fic of this fic. Additional note totally not related to the bingo square: I will ALWAYS be here for positive sex worker representation in fics. Fair warning, though, this is the most unfair AU in existence because the brain screams that it SHOULDN’T WORK and yet by some sort of writerly sorcery, it DOES. PLEASE READ IT IF YOU HAVEN’T ALREADY.

Wept Real Tears

let it make you by @thelionshymnal​ Rated M It’s not every day that someone manages to write a fic that makes me stare numbly at the very first line for a solid 15 minutes, big fat tears rolling down my cheeks, but Hymn did it. And then she somehow managed to kiss it better. All in 1100 words.

Free Space

AnS Role Swap AU by @owlsshadows​ Rated M This series has it all. Shirayuki as an assassin. Obi as both a royal bastard and a pharmacist. A mysterious meeting out in the woods where it makes you question whether Nanaki and Obi are two different people or the same. Also Zen having some very conflicted feelings regarding his royal authority and how he can choose to handle rejection.

Edit: Since I’ve already doubled up once, let me double up again, I have so much love to give and not enough space to give it!

Blizzard by @nebluus​ Rated T This is one of the earliest fics I read in this fandom and it remains to date one of my absolute favorites. Obi gets hurt protecting his Miss and a blizzard rolls in. Thankfully they find a cabin where Obi, who is definitely on his death bed if no one finds them and SOON, proceeds to still fuss over his Miss. Best scene: When he warms her hands with his. Also the second chapter is all sorts of delightful domesticity I IMPLORE you to please read it and soon.

Favorite Fan-Made OC

All Pain Will Turn to Medicine by @sabraeal​ Rated M All y’all should’ve seen these coming from ten miles out. I fucking LOVE Herr Anda, the cantankerous little bastard. And Jen knows this because she designed him specifically with me in mind. Academic catnap >:|

AU That Made You Find the Source Material

All Knotted Up by @sabraeal​ Rated G Admittedly, there are a great many AUs out there that made me look up the source material, but this Tangled AU is the most recent because I finally got on Disney+. And yes, Mitsuhide is the horse. Ryuu may be Pascal a little bit, but Mitsuhide. He’s The Horse. XD

First AnS Fic You Read

Loyalty by Evelyn Fiedler Rated K+ (which is basically G on AO3) My one and only ff.net rec from my earliest days in the fandom when I was combing for absolutely any content I could find, begging the fandom to help me decide if I was down for Obiyuki and all that it implied and this author most assuredly delivered.

Favorite Minor Character

Undertow by @jhalya​ Rated E The fic itself is a space odyssey of sorts. One mission among many where humanity attempts to colonize Mars. However the real selling point here, if you didn’t know, is Lord Seiran. He is a delightfully eccentric billionaire who clearly always wanted a large family, judging from how easily he fills out the adoption paperwork.

WIP

Caulk dirty to me by @leewritingrecs​ Rated E Have I mentioned I love the sex worker trope? I. Love. The. Sex. Worker. Trope. Also Obi is clearly divine at all of his jobs. Shirayuki already got to experience his skills at one of them. I wait with BAITED BREATH for her to experience the other :3

Canon Compliant

Thicker than Blood by @infinitelystrangemachinex​ Rated G In the aftermath of the death of King Kain, Izana and Zen must decide on which path they will take moving forward. Amazing fic. Unfinished, but a wonderful look into the dynamics between the Wisteria brothers and their absent mother.

One-Shot

Worth his Weight in Rice by @claudeng80​ Rated T AU set in an Edo-adjacent Period where a disease has wiped killed off a significant portion of the male population. Resulting societal shifts occur. If you go into the comments, I have a couple of pages worth of reasons why I love this AU, but what I appreciate even more is how you have an absolutely perfect oneshot in this fic. It is a well-translated universe where we get a delightful clear, beginning, middle, and end, all in 5k. NOT an easy feat. Please enjoy.

Rare Pair

the fog pushing through my mind by @thelionshymnal​ Rated E Obi/Yuzuri, friends with benefits. Two pining idiots with some sore feelings decide to get stoned and take comfort in another warm body for the night. I just really enjoyed the casual intimacy of the encounter and how this is clearly neither of their first experiences with a one night stand. Neither of them are going to make it weird in the morning, they just need to take the edge off, ya know? Additional bonus for Obi being ready to stab the dumbasses who made Yuzuri feel like she was a weirdo in her past.

AU You Took a Chance On (And Now Love)

Lightning in a Bottle by @jhalya​ Rated M I mean, if Jules is gonna play dirty by making Obi the hot fish man running around without his shirt on 99% of the time, then of COURSE I’m going to enjoy Deep Blue Sea. It’s, like, one of my favorite movies now.

Favorite Trope

Moonshine Phantom by @leewritingrecs​ Rated T We got a murder muffin who ALSO used to be a sex worker? Sign me the fuck up, I am 1000% here for this. Also all the showgirls who clearly love their coworker and only want him and his adorable wife to have the best. They may have never heard of her before, but she looks sweet, and they all have a silent agreement between them that if she breaks his heart, they’ll cut her.

Fic That Gave You a New OTP

What the Heart Wants by @sabraeal​ Rated G Haruto/Mukaze. An attempted kidnapping and subsequent rescue makes Zen and Shirayuki painfully aware that their parents have had, at some point in their lives, sex. Izana may not be happy about someone banging his mom, but is HE rather pleased at having a new sister. >:3c

Pre-Canon

The Wolf in the Woods by @krispy-kream​ (YES I STILL HAVE THIS BOOKMARKED) Rated G Everyone knows that I have very delicate food feels and this ALMOST went under the Wept Real Tears category, but I like to spread out the crying as much as possible XD Shirayuki finds a boy at the edge of the wood and decides he needs something to eat. Filed under: Guaranteed to wreck me in 500 words or less.

[wkemeup]

Guiding Light (13)

summary: It was supposed to be a simple mission. Get the intel and go home. Until everything goes wrong and you’re taken captive by Hydra and now, Bucky can’t breathe without you. Not until he brings you home. If he even can. pairing: bucky x reader chapter word count: 9.4k  warnings: the final chapter 😭, and a little smut and fluff bc yall really deserve it 🖤series masterlist // series playlist

T H R E E  M O N T H S  L A T E R

“I don’t know about this.”

You winced from the cold compress of the patches Shuri gently pressed against the side of your head; wires connecting to machines on your left, monitoring your brain waves and internal chemistry. She pursed her lips at you, giving you that teenage pout, and pressed another electrode to your temple. She’d told you enough times as it was that this was an entirely safe procedure and it was only to ensure that her good work paid off.

In the three months since Hydra infiltrated the compound back in New York, you’d spent your time in Wakanda alongside Shuri. It was supposed to be an easy process to remove the triggers from your mind since she’d already been successful in doing the same for Bucky, but it appeared slightly more challenging with you. It took a bit of extra time but she assured you all the while that you were safe. You didn’t need to go under ice the way Bucky had done.

It took three months but she was able to successfully pull the words from your head. She just needed to prove it. Which is how you ended up sitting in the middle of her lab, heart racing a mile a minute, as she handed a thick red book to Bucky.

Your words. Your triggers. He was going to say them.

“You should strap me down,” you offered for the third time, eyeing Bucky as he flipped the pages of the red book, studying the handwritten notes. He looked up, slowly, a tight smile on his face.

“It’s not necessary, sweetheart,” Bucky said simply. “Shuri’s tech worked. The words aren’t going to affect you. This is all just to give you peace of mind.”

“Sergeant Barnes is right,” Shuri confirmed, smiling brightly at you as she pressed a few buttons on the computer, machine, whatever it was. This technology was far out of your scope. “You will be just fine. I promise. There is no need for restraints.”

“What if it doesn’t work?” you argued, hands shaking and Bucky narrowed his eyes on the tremors running through. 

He quickly set the book down on the table he had been sitting on and crossed the room to you. He knelt by your side, hand brushing your hair back from the wiring, cool metal resting on the nape of your neck.

“If it doesn’t work, I’ll be right here,” he said carefully. “If it comes to that, I’m here, okay? Shuri’s safe. I’m safe. We’ve got a whole army on the other side of that door.”

“You didn’t put up enough of a fight last time, Buck,” you reminded him, voice impossibly quiet and Shuri took a few paces back, occupying herself with something on the other end of the room.

“I know,” he admitted, leaning forward to kiss your shoulder. “I promise it won’t come to that again. If, and I’m saying if, you get triggered, I’ll make sure you don’t hurt anyone. Besides, Shuri has this place on lockdown. You have to know she has a stockpile of weapons around here somewhere and she’s more than capable of defending herself. She had to knock me out a few times back when getting the words out was trial and error. Isn’t that right, kiddo?”

“It was never boring, I’ll give you that,” Shuri grinned as she continued typing away. Bucky nodded for her to return and she jogged back over to you, offering you a reassuring smile. “Whenever you’re ready Sergeant Barnes.”

“How many times do I need to remind you to call me Bucky?” he laughed, and you knew he was trying to lighten the mood because even Shuri started to giggle and teased him back, but your nerves were skyrocketing and you needed to get this over with. He picked up the red book and flipped the page with your words scribbled on it in messy writing.

“Does it have to be you?” you asked timidly.

Bucky gritted his teeth, an exhale from his lungs. “If we want to be as accurate as possible, yes. A single mispronunciation could throw off the whole sequence. Shuri had to fly in a native speaker last time and I figured since I was already here...”

“Okay,” you nodded, readying yourself. You gripped the ends of the arm rests until your knuckles ached.

Shuri flipped on a switch and the whirl of the machines echoed through the lab. She gave the okay to Bucky and without wasting another second, he began to read.

“Марафон, горький, Бруклинский,” he called out, thick Russian heavy in his voice and you disliked the grind of it as it left his tongue. You took a steady breath and tried to focus on the pacing of his feet back and forth and the clenching of his left fist at his side as he continued.

“скаут, боевой, возлюбленная.” He looked up to you, searching for any kind of warning signs to stop but you were still. You closed your eyes and tried to lose yourself in your breaths. In. Out. Steady and even.

“мелодия, вена, шестнадцать,” his voice continued, nine of out ten. You could still think, still had a steady stream of consciousness which you were all too aware of, worry and anxiety leaving a mark in your thoughts. Your jaw was clenched so tightly, it ached.

“страсть,” Bucky said with an exhale. It was the last word.

You kept your eyes closed, waiting, because even though you had been withering from the pain your head by the third word the last time you’d been triggered in the compound, you were certain Hydra would find a way to pull the rug from under you again, make you believe you were safe before they sprung the soldier back into your mind and nearly made you kill the love of your life with your own hands.

“Sweetheart,” Bucky called, his voice close enough to you to startle a jump in your heart. His hand rested on your thigh, running smooth, gentle circles to coax your eyes open again. “It’s over, Y/n. They had no effect on you. Shuri did it.”

Slowly, you opened your eyes to find Bucky kneeling in front of your chair, the widest, most beautiful smile on his face; one filled with love and relief and sincerity. His hand snaked up against the side of your face and pulled you in for a quick kiss, warm lips against yours and you felt the anxiety slip through you like it had never been there. He pulled back just as Shuri stepped by your side.

“Of course, I did it,” Shuri teased as she started to remove the wires from your temple. “Did you ever doubt me?”

“That was my fault, clearly,” you laughed.

“Don’t worry,” Shuri grinned, removing the last electrode, “you won’t make that mistake again.”

***

In all your time in Wakanda, you hadn’t left the palace, let alone the floor you’d been assigned to and the confines of Shuri’s lab. You were too afraid to be out in open spaces, to risk the chance of anyone finding out those awful words and using them against you. Even with Bucky constantly at your side, gentle encouragements, always reminding you that you were safe here, you couldn't seem to get past the elevator doors.

Now, stepping out into the busy streets, holding his hand, you wondered how you could possibly keep yourself from such beauty. Street venders with fresh fruits and hand-woven garments lined the streets, bustling and crowded, but filled with smiling faces and children playing between the shops.

“You want something?” Bucky asked, looking to the layers and baskets of fruits as you walked by, then to the gorgeous display of handmade jewelry, distracted by the organized chaos of the market.

You leaned your head on his shoulder, smiling up at him, reveling in the feeling of his hand woven tight in yours. “Just you.”

He chuckled, shaking his head. “Not what I meant, sweetheart.”

“It’s still true.”

He led you through the busy streets until the venders sat further and further apart, the sidewalks were a little less crowded, and the buildings started to fall behind you in exchange for open fields and rolling hills. It was gorgeous, unlike anything you’d ever seen.

“Where are we going?” you asked.

“You’ll see.”

Bucky wasn’t usually one for adventures. It was always you that dragged him off into the city or to a coastal town or convinced him to go apple picking on the back of his motorcycle. It was you that lugged him along to places he’d only figure out where you were taking him once you got there so he didn’t have a chance to back out. It was unusual for him, but if he was ever going to be the one to take you somewhere special, it would be somewhere like this.

Quiet. Peaceful. With open land for miles and the sun setting over the trees in stunning shades of purples and pinks and reds.

Eventually, you came up on a small cottage, almost a hut from the size of it, the only structured building for miles sitting amongst a sea of green grass and shaded trees. He paused as it came into view, a heavy exhale in his chest of something like relief and remembrance.

“It’s beautiful out here, Buck,” you said softly, realizing what this place was to him, “I’m surprised you ever left.”

“I always did have a hard time saying no to Steve,” he admitted, “but if I stayed here, I never would have met you.”

“Don’t you miss all your goats?” you teased, curling up against his arm as you started walking again, together, towards the cottage. He had told you stories once of his time in Wakanda; how he’d lived a quiet life in the country side tending to small farm animals and finding himself again. Shuri and T’Challa came out to check on him every once in a while, but for a long time it was just him and the animals. It was what he needed.

Bucky smiled, looking to the long metal bins approaching on his left where he would lay the feed for the animals. They’d run so fast, tripping over their legs when they were little, just to find a place around the bin to stick their head in and grab their fill before they got shoved out of the way. It was a fond memory. He didn’t have much of those around the time.

“I made sure they all found good homes before I left, don’t you worry,” Bucky said, pinching at your hip and drawing a short yelp out of you before you started laughing. “Maybe we’ll stop and check on Grant.”

You raised an eyebrow, grinning wildly.

“He was the runt of the bunch,” Bucky shrugged, chuckling, and it was magical just to hear his laugh again, “had to name him after Stevie. I left him with one of the kids who used to mess with me back in the day. That little rascal better be taking good care of him...”

“Oh, I'm sure he’s just fine.” You nudged Bucky in the side playfully and he only smiled back at you.

Coming up on the cottage, Bucky stepped forward and opened the door for you. There were no locks, even after three years, because that was the kind of place Wakanda was, is. If Bucky Barnes could sleep soundly without ten different deadbolts, it had to be the safest place in the world. You had no doubt it was.

As you walked inside, you were surprised to find it neatly organized, almost untouched from the day he left. Bed neatly made though the mattress was hard as a rock, something Sam had explained to you about soldiers when they returned from war feeling like they were sinking into anything that gave to his weight even an inch. Pots and pans hung on a drying rack, like he intended to put them away but never had the chance.

What really caught your eye was the bookshelf; bindings of red and green and black that filled row after row of shelves. You almost hit Bucky on the arm, thinking that he had been working on catching up on the literary work he’d missed before he even met you and had simply indulged you, but as you stepped closer, you realized they weren’t novels at all. They were journals.

You let your hand graze over the bindings, pulling dust from their canvas and turning back to Bucky with an aura of awe and surprise in your features. He nodded, ushering you to look because he knew you wanted to. He didn’t mind. He’d let you into the darkest corners of his memories if you wanted. You’d find a way to turn on a light. You always did.

Pulling a random one from the shelf, a deep purple binging that stood out amongst the others, you flipped through the pages. Crinkles and worn with use and thick black ink detailed on each page, you tried your best to skim. Some pages had images, newspaper clippings that Shuri must have brought down for him. Old memories and trains of thought as they came out, trying to determine what was real and what was told to him.

You flipped to a page with an old, faded photograph from the 1940s. Hand to your heart, you gasped at the image. Bucky stood amongst a line of men in combat uniforms, hard hat upon his head and the straps hanging down by his ears. Covered in dirt and grim and the brightest smile on his face you’d ever seen. Short hair and an innocence in his eyes that shocked you.

“It was before the 107th was captured,” Bucky clarified, stepping closer and looking fondly over your shoulder, “those guys became the Howling Commandos once Steve came around.”

You recognized the men from the exhibit in the Smithsonian. Bucky had asked you go with him nearly a year into your friendship and it had been the hardest question he’d ever asked anyone. He could still remember the sweat in his palm and the racing in his heart when he asked you. Of course, you agreed with a beaming smile and asked Tony if you could take the next jet out.

“You were always so handsome,” you smiled, fingertip tracing over his image.

“You think I should cut my hair again?” Bucky teased, wrapping his arms around you from behind and kissing your shoulder.

“That is not a decision I want on my conscious,” you laughed, leaning back into him. “That choice is all yours, baby. I’d love you either way.”

“Even if I shave the whole thing and start from scratch?”

“It’d be hard, but I’d get through it.”

“A hero amongst men,” Bucky declared, grinning against the skin of your neck. He peppered kisses to your collarbone, squeezing his arms tighter around you. Then, just as your hands started to snake over his, he pulled back suddenly. “Wait here.”

You narrowed your eyes suspiciously as Bucky pulled open the middle drawer in his dresser, searching around under layers of garments until he pulled out a laptop. You laughed, figuring you should have realized Shuri wouldn’t let him go entirely without access to technology on his own. He winked at you, firing it up and began typing at the keyboard.

“Buck? What are you doing?”

“Just wait, sweetheart. Patience.”

You sighed, plopping down on the edge of the bed, and though it was firm under you, it wasn’t as uncomfortable as you thought it might be. It was familiar, this feeling. Though it lacked the blood stains and edges of springs you’d had while at Hydra, but it was comforting almost, in the way that mattress had been for you.

You remembered Sam telling you once that he slept on the floor most nights after returning home from the war because the mattress was too soft. You suspected Shuri had this one made for him to accommodate his needs.

Glancing back to Bucky, you laughed under your breath to see his eyes light up.

He pressed a single button on the keyboard and set the laptop up on top of the dresser. The soft strums of a guitar playing delicately through the speaker of Bucky’s laptop began to filter through the room. It was a careful melody of chords you were familiar with, ones that incorporated piano gracefully between the notes, and a pair of voices sitting in contrast of one another, one rough and raspy, one soft and breathy.

Listening carefully, your eyes fell to the floor, just getting lost in the gentle melodies and hymns of the first verse. It was a song from the playlist you’d made him nearly four years ago. You wondered if you should be surprised he still listened to it after all this time.

You looked up in awe to find Bucky leaning against the dresser watching you with the kind of warmth in his eyes as if you’d hung the moon and the stars and the entirety of the universe. He extended a hand to you, wordless, and waited patiently until your lips curved up in a smile and slipped cool metal into your hand. You guided his left hand to rest on your lower back, gathering his right in your own as you let your arm hang off of his shoulder.

Falling slowly, eyes that know me And I can't go back And moods that take me and erase me And I'm painted black

You leaned your head on his shoulder, where metal met flesh, and curled against his neck, closing your eyes as you carefully swayed with him. Silently. Listening. Reveling in the feel of his body so close to yours, the steady beat of his heart thumping under your ear, his hand wrapped in yours, the gentle brush of his thumb upon your back as it rubbed tenderly against your shirt.

Well, you have suffered enough And warred with yourself It's time that you won

Needing to feel him closer, you slowly released his hand, wrapping both of your arms around his neck. Face pressed to the crook of his neck as his arms snaked around your waist. He smelled faintly of fresh soap and the lavender fields you’d passed on your way to the cottage. The swaying faded as the melody continued without you and you found yourself just standing in the middle of Bucky’s room, holding onto him like he was all you had.

Take this sinking boat and point it home We've still got time

Bucky nudged his nose against your cheek, urging your face from its home against his neck. Warm breath tickling against your skin as his lips brushed ever so slightly against your cheekbone, moving down in peppered kisses until he captured your lips against his.

Raise your hopeful voice, you have a choice You've made it now

The music began to fade to the background, passionate strums of the guitar, fingers gracing along piano keys, voices singing in harmonies that lifted the soul, rendered silent in comparison to the feel of Bucky’s lips on your own, the only sense your body would allow you to focus on. Soft, plump lips as he took your bottom lip into his mouth, sucking sweetly, his tongue tracing along the edge of your mouth until you parted your lips further. Tongues swept over one another, open mouthed and wanting him as close as he could possibly get.

Your hands grabbed against the fabric of his shirt around the collar, tugging at it until he parted from you for an impossibly brief moment to shed himself of the material. Hardened ripples of muscle under your fingers as you trailed your hands down his chest, over his abs, and he shivered.

His hands grazed against your waist, sliding up under your shirt against the bare of your skin, cool metal and warm flesh running along curves. Wordlessly, he began to lift your shirt until you raised your arms for him, allowing the fabric to be discarded to the ground. He smiled, warm and loving, as he looked at you, eyes trailing over your breasts to your face and you reached behind you to unclasp your bra, shedding it to the floor.

“You’re the most beautiful woman I’ve ever seen,” Bucky exhaled as he stepped forward, ushering you to lay on the bed. As you followed his lead, settling against the hard mattress, your hair falling up around your head in a halo, you brought his lips to yours.

“You see a lot of beautiful women lately?” you teased.

“None since I met you,” he replied with warm kissed to the corners of your mouth, then down to your neck. He sucked at a spot that made your back arch, seeking more, before he mumbled, “can’t remember any before you, either. It’s only you. Just you.”

Shocked by his sincerity, not an ounce of teasing in his tone, you cupped the sides of his face, bringing him back to your lips and kissed him sweetly.

“You’re it for me, too, you know,” you said, watching as crinkles formed up by his eyes in the smile curving on his lips. “You’re all I want, Bucky Barnes.”

He hovered over you, arms caged around your head, and you parted your legs, giving him space to lay his body weight against you. He kissed your lips, soft and gentle, and then with a fevered passion as you dragged your core up against him, eliciting a moan, deep and heavy. You could feel the length of his hardness between you, confined by the cloth of his pants but prominent with every thrust against you.

Chest to chest and seeking the sweet release of friction between you, Bucky kissed his way down your neck over your collarbone, until he pulled a hardened nipple into his mouth. Swirling his tongue around the bud, you arched against him, hands raking into his hair. He chuckled softly against you, releasing you from his mouth so he could continue his way down to your waist. Pressing kisses to your hipbones, his fingers curled against the fabric of your pants before he glanced up at you.

You nodded, lifting your waist to help him remove the material, sliding it down your legs along with your panties. Discarding it along with the rest of the clothes, Bucky settled back between your thighs, kissing sweetly at your outer lips, at the creases of your leg to your hip.

“Never gonna get tired of this,” he whispered, warm breath against your core and you shivered.

“You say that now,” you laughed, squirming against him as he ran his fingers through your folds. You’d had more nights together than the first, but every time he touched you it felt like no had ever done it before, no one before him, like every movement was brand new and his touch was all you knew.

“I’ll say it every time,” he insisted playfully, leaning his head against your thigh as he looked up at you, his fingers coating in your wetness. 

He began circling at your clit, watching as your eyes fluttered closed, the evidence of his touch present with the parting of your lips and the moan that slipped through.

“Bucky,” you whined his name just as he slipped a single digit into you, cool and solid, metal. 

Sheets bunched up into your hands and a second finger joined. Slowly, steady pumps as his fingertips grazed over the spot, curving against it, that made your head dizzy. He was heaven and solace and every good thing in this world.

With a gasp, you grabbed onto his hair, tugging as you felt the warm heat of his tongue press to your clit. He was too good at that for someone who’d avoided human interaction for nearly seventy-five years. It was muscle memory, you supposed, though he swore he never touched or kissed or made love to a woman the way he did with you.

The pressure was enough, the swirl of his tongue over the bud as he brought it into his mouth, sucking, fingers thrusting, and you came with cry of his name. Pleasure rushing through your core, your legs, panting in your chest, and you felt Bucky kissing his way back up to your lips.

You hummed against him as he kissed you, tasting yourself on his tongue.

“Love you,” you mumbled hazily and he chuckled.

“Figured you might after I did something like that.”

You laughed, shoving him off of you so he flopped onto his back. Mischievous grin on your face, you crawled down to his waist. He wasted no time and helped you remove his pants, pulling the briefs off as well because the anticipation was killing him. He was so hard beneath the fabric, each brush of the material over his cock drawing a wince out of him, too sensitive.

“Y/n, baby,” he mused as your hands trailed along his thighs, nails gliding over thick muscle, “need you so bad.”

“I know, honey,” you cooed, leaning forward and licking a thick stripe up his shaft from the base to the tip. Tongue pressing against the throbbing vein up his underside before you took his tip into your mouth. He bucked up against you, cursing as he tried to restrain himself.

You pressed your hands to his thighs in an attempt to keep him still as you took in as much of him as you could manage. Hollowing your cheeks, you began to bob your head, sliding his cock against your tongue, reveling in the sweet sounds he produced above you.

Bucky didn’t shy away from the noises he made, noises you drew from him because he knew they only spurred you on. They were sinful. Delicious. And they went straight between your legs, leaving you wet and needy and dripping.

“Ah- fuck, sweetheart,” Bucky moaned, fingers snaking into your hair.

He was throbbing in your mouth, so close to the edge and you were more than ready to milk him dry, when you felt him carefully tug you away. You sat back, narrowing your eyes, to find him staring at you dizzily, blissed out.

“Wanna come in you,” he explained, his voice a little sedated and you giggled, nodding as you climbed on top of him, straddling his waist.

His hands sat on your hips, just brushing softly over your curved until you dragged your soaked folds up along his shaft, covering him in your wetness, and his fingers dug into you. He bit down hard on his lip, eyes closing in the sensation as you rolled your hips again. His hands guided your movements, adding pressure with every roll.

Your walls clenched around nothing and you couldn’t stand it anymore. Lining him up with your entrance, his tip brushing against your clit before you aligned him where you needed him most, and you met his eye. Ocean blue eyes stared back at you filled with a kind of awe and love and surrender that made your heart tighten. 

You sank down onto him in agonizing pace, his cock stretching and filling you inch by inch until you took all of him, sitting against his hips and as close as two people could possibly be.

“Oh fuck,” Bucky exhaled, head falling back to the pillow, “you feel so good, sweetheart, so fucking good.”

“I don’t know how I ever survived before you,” you cooed, rolling your hips and pulled a sharp gasp out of him, “don’t know how I got off without you inside me.”

“God, Y/n, you can’t just say stuff like that to me,” he whined, pushing his waist up against you as you moved to lie against his chest. Slow thrusts from under you, meet you half way as you pushed down against him. Friction like thunder and lightning.

“And why not?”

“We’ll never leave this bed again, doll,” Bucky teased, his voice breathy and panting in the exertion, “I’d just keep fucking you and loving you until neither of us can move.”

“I like how that sounds,”

The sound of your bodies melding together filled the room. His hands were all over you, trailing along the bare of your back, pinching at your nipples, running through your hair, grabbing at your ass to pull you flush against him with every thrust.

You could feel your walls starting to clench around him, the pressure building so sweetly between your legs, and you whined, a moan that let Bucky know exactly where you were. He slipped his hand between your bodies, feeling for your clit and began to rub fast circles against the sensitive bud. You gasped, head falling into the crook of his neck as you grabbed onto his shoulders, fingers only able to find give on his right side.

“O-oh God, Bucky, don’t stop,”

He didn’t let up, his pace relentless and exquisite and explosive and your release hit you suddenly with the push of his hips and the circle of his fingers of your clit. The hardest you’ve ever fallen from that height, the pleasure pulsed through you, drawn out in waves of endless rush as Bucky sought his own release. You cried out, squirming and a moaning mess over him, as he gripped hard onto your hips and rolled you onto your back, not daring to lose contact for even a second.

His thrusts became faster then, more erratic and you could feel how close his was, his cock throbbing and twitching with each push.

“Bucky, ah-fuck,” you gasped, your walls clenching again so close to your last release. It was too much. It wasn’t enough. It was perfect and sinful and worth all of the pain you’d been you just to be with him now, to have this moment, to see him above you with sweat dripping from the ends of his hair and a far-gone look in his eyes because for once he felt something other than pain, he felt pleasure.

“I’m so close, baby,” you cooed, urging him on as the pressure built at your core, “so fucking close. Need you to come for me, baby. Ah- God, I need—I need you to—ah, ah, f-fuck!”

Second waves of pleasure rippling through you, your walls clenching impossibly tight around him and Bucky came with a strangled grunt. Warmth spread through you as he prolonged his release, his lips pressing to your neck as his arms curled around you. His chest flush to yours, he rolled his hips lazily until he was too sensitive for more and stilled.

Head on your chest, you raked your fingers through his hair, pushing it aside to find his face. His was smiling hazily, eyes closed, and you pressed your lips to his forehead. Playing with his hair and listening to the grainy sounds of guitar and Ray LaMontagne singing from the speaker of Bucky’s laptop, he started to move, to pull out of you in an effort to clean the two of you up, but you held him still.

“Just stay here with me,” you urged, kissing his hairline.

“I’ll be right back, sweetheart, I swear it,” Bucky sighed, propping himself up off your chest and brining his lips to yours, soft and chaste and perfect. “We’ve got all the time in the world together, Y/n. I’ll give you all of my days if you want them.”

“It won’t be enough,” you sighed, kissing him sweetly, “I’ll want more after that, too.”

“Might have to take that up with the big guy.”

“Not sure what Banner can do about it but I’ll ask.”

Bucky laughed, his chest vibrating against you and he peppered kisses to your cheek, your nose, your eyelids, your neck. He settled back against your lips, giving you one last kiss, warm and familiar, before he said, “You know I’d spend an eternity in you, darling, but someone’s waiting for us.”

You narrowed your eyes, turning to follow Bucky’s gaze to the small wooden cube sitting on the kitchen table. From the center, a light blue light flashed.

“We’re being summoned back at the palace,” he explained with a smile. “It’s how Shuri would get ahold of me back in the day.”

“Ok fine,” you mumbled teasingly, allowing him to pull away and slide out of you. The emptiness you felt without him between your legs was prevalent, but you tried to push it aside. “She’s lucky she single-handedly cured both of us. Not sure I’d be willing to leave this room for anyone else.”

“We can always come back. I want to hear more of that dirty mouth of yours,” Bucky teased, winking as he disappeared into the bathroom.

The sound of running water filled the room and he returned shortly after, a damp washcloth in his hand. He carefully ran it up your inner thigh, removing the traces of himself from your skin, and rested it between your legs gently.

“I’ll hold you to that,” you laughed, nodding for Bucky to remove the cloth.

“I hope you do.”

***

“What do you got for us?” Bucky asked as he sauntered into the room, hand clasped tightly in your own. He dragged you along behind him, still feeling dizzy from the way he’d pushed you against the wall outside of the lab and kissed you just to tease you.

“You two are disgusting, just so you know,” Shuri laughed, pointing her fingers at the two of you and then tapping the monitor above her computer. It displayed the hallway in perfect definition. Your cheeks flushed red and you swatted Bucky on the arm.

“Shuri,” Bucky warned, a chuckle in his voice.

She rolled her eyes playfully and ushered for you to follow her. Pulling to a stop she stood in front of a series of monitors, all black, and asked you to take a seat. You narrowed your eyes suspiciously, looking to Bucky for support.

“Please, Y/n, you may want to be seated,” Shuri requested again and you slumped down into the chair behind you. Bucky took his place by your side and you felt his hand grab onto yours, squeezing gently.

Shuri sighed, exchanging a knowing look with Bucky. “Sergeant Barnes requested I do some digging on someone very important to you.”

You looked up at Bucky, confused, and he only offered a warm semblance of a smile, encouraging you to listen. Your heart was racing all of a sudden and you wondered how it was so easy to fall between this feeling and the joy you felt holding onto Bucky just moments before.

“His name was Private Daniel Henry Welch,”

An image of Danny appeared on the screen, arms behind his back, chin up, dressed in his formal Army uniform with the American flag behind him, proud. Your hand clamped over your mouth, stifling the gasp as you rose to your feet, walking towards the image. Tears welled in your eyes as your fingers traced over the screen. He was younger than you remembered, more freckles on his face when it was absent of dirt and grime.

“He would have turned twenty-one last week,” Shuri continued softly as tears fell down your cheeks. She stepped back, giving you space, as you stared to read over the list of information upon the screens she had compiled for you.

He was born and raised in New Harmony, Indiana to single mother named Brenda with stunning green eyes and long blonde hair. His eight-year-old brother Nathan was a spitting image of Danny; all smiles and thick, curly, ginger hair with freckles peppered over his nose and cheeks. He played soccer in high school, but for the town over because his school was too small to form a whole team on their own. He won a scholarship for writing a poem in middle school that he ended up using to buy books for his English class in tenth grade. 

He was as kind and sweet and lost as you’d remembered him and you still couldn’t imagine how a boy so soft had ended up on the other side of the world fighting someone else’s war.

He was the boy who rushed off base to help a stranger start his car.

Bucky came up behind you, wrapping his arms around your shoulders and you leaned back against his chest. Tears falling freely, you grabbed onto Bucky’s forearms, keeping him as firm against you as you could manage.

“Has anyone told his mom yet?” you asked Shuri and she shook her head.

“He’s still declared as Missing in Action according to the US Army database but it looks like there’s a lot of speculation that he was killed by rebel forces,” Shuri sighed. “They have no proof of what happened and with you as the only living witness...”

You nodded, brushing the tears from your eyes, pulling away from Bucky’s arms. The world still believed you to be dead. It was Tony that advised you keep it a secret from the public until Shuri could remove the words from your head. You’d had your time to heal and find peace and live in paradise with the man you’d only ever dreamed of seeing again after all that happened to you. You had your moment in the bubble.

You turned to Bucky, determined.

“Call Tony. It’s time we go home.”

***

Tony arranged for a press conference the day you returned. He did most of the talking and explained how Hydra had used a shifter to dissuade the Avengers from continuing their search for you. The room had gone up in chaos when you emerged from behind the door as Tony gestured for you to walk out as proof. Hundreds of questions firing at you all at once, loud voices shouting over one another, as flashes of cameras blinded you enough to cause you to wince.

Thankfully, Tony knew enough to keep you at his side, informing the journalists that all questions could be diverted to him. The room was divided. Some asking how it was even possible you were who you said you were while others praised you for your bravery and resilience.

The public wasn’t much different. Message boards popped up all the country filled with conspiracy theories about how you were the shapeshifter and the real Y/n died that day on the live stream. 

Protests outside of the Avengers tower downtown erupted, demanding the truth, while counter protestors walked the streets to show their support. Parades through Brooklyn and celebrations throughout the city took place once the news hit. Half the city seemed to accept what happened, while the other became wrapped up in Hydra’s lies.

Tony explained who Cain was and how he was the mastermind behind the plan, though he was exceptionally careful not to release information on why they had taken you in the first place and how you’d been conditioned into the soldier. The team had enough backlash against Bucky for the crimes he committed under Hydra’s control, they didn’t need the public speculating about your ability to control your own motivations, too.

Even as Tony ushered you away from the reporters and the flashing lights and invasive questions, throwing yourself into Bucky’s arm as he waited for you outside of the conference room, you felt no relief. Announcing you were alive to the world wasn’t what you were worried about. It was a necessary first step before you could do the very thing you’d left paradise for.

It was how you ended up on the front porch of a suburban house with white paneling and green shutters in an impossibly small town in Indiana. You stared at the dark green door, the flowerbeds handing from the windowsills and the wreath made of woven branches hanging at the center of the door.

“I can’t do this,” you whispered.

“Yes, you can,” Bucky said softly, squeezing your hand. “It’s all you’ve been thinking about.”

“What if she hates me? She's going to blame me for what happened to him, Buck. I couldn’t save him and now he’s gone and--”

“Y/n,” Bucky cut you off gently, turning you to face him. His eyes were the most stunning shade of blue. “If my ma ever knew what happened to me, if she knew I survived, and someone could have told her that while I was being tortured and starved and turned into this monster, I wasn’t alone, that I had someone like you to watch out for me and care for me... I can’t even imagine the relief she would have felt. It makes a world of difference.”

You nodded, trying to take in his words. He was sincere in what he said, you knew that much, and maybe you believed it yourself, but the pain of a grieving mother outweighed good intentions. Bottom line was you couldn’t save her son. You couldn’t protect him. You didn’t know if she’d even want to see your face. You just wanted her to know that he wasn’t alone.

Frozen, you tried to will your hand to the door, to knock, but you couldn’t move. Bucky must have noticed because his closed fist extended to the frame and knocked three times. It only took a few seconds of your heart pounding in your chest before the door swung open, only you weren’t met with Danny’s mother.

You stared into the spitting image of Danny, nothing but curly orange hair and freckles littered across his face. He raised an eyebrow, looking your over before he turned to Bucky, eyes narrowing on his left arm. Bucky tucked it into his pocket.

“Um, mom?” he called back into the house. “We’ve got Avengers on our porch...”

Nathan stepped aside, though he kept his stare on Bucky. His nervousness was mixed with a kind of awe, almost an excitement, that seemed to catch Bucky completely off guard. He licked his lips, waiting as shuffling came from the top of the stairs inside the house, and pointed to Bucky’s arm.

“Is it really made of metal?” he asked, tilting his head to try and get a better look.

A smile curved up on your lips despite the harrowing ache in your stomach as Bucky nodded, pulling his hand from his pocket and flexing his fingers for the boy to see.

“No way! That’s awesome!” Nathan exclaimed, reaching out to touch Bucky’s hand. You were surprised to find Bucky didn’t shy away from it and instead started to chuckle as the kid examined the intricacies of the Wakandan prosthetic.

“Nathan? What’s going on?” a voice called from upstairs, his mother, Brenda, and your heart clenched. She walked down the stairs slowly, drying the ends of her long blonde hair with a towel, though she set it to hang over the bannister as she saw you, her eyes widening. “Agent Y/l/n. Sergeant Barnes. W-what are you doing here?”

You gulped and you felt Bucky’s hand squeeze yours, though he took a step back. This moment was yours and yours alone.

“I saw what happened on the news,” she continued, scratching her head, “about how you’d survived Hydra. I know my Nathan was happy to see that. He always loved the Avengers. My oldest... Danny... he did, too.”

Nathan’s face blushed dark red and he shot his mom a glare, though she smiled softly, sadly. She turned back to you.

“Sorry,” she mumbled, wiping the tears from her eyes before they could fall, “what can I do for you?”

“How much do you know about what happened to your son?” you asked as carefully as you could manage, the shakiness in your own voice betraying you.

Brenda shrugged, shaking her head, “not much. All I was told was that he abandoned his base and was... killed by mercenaries.”

You took a deep breath. She knew even less than you thought.

“Ma’am, if you don’t mind, I can tell you more about what happened,” you offered, watching as her face twisted into a kind of pained realization, “I knew him for a while. I was with him.”

Brenda and Nathan exchanged glances, ones of shock, and she nodded quickly, stepping aside to let you in. She led you to the living room and asked you to sit, offered you tea or water or anything else in her fridge and because you suspected she needed something to do, something to feel useful you took her up on her offer for tea.

As she prepared the hot water, Bucky escorted Nathan out to the back yard, promising to show him a few moves and toss a ball while you talked with his mom. The relief on Brenda’s face was evident as she squeezed Bucky’s forearm in thanks as he walked by.

Glancing around the room while you waited for the high pitched whistle of the kettle, you found yourself looking at old pictures of Danny and his brother. Getting lost in smiling faces and the memories hung upon the wall, you barely noticed Brenda walk back into the room and set the cup of tea on the coffee table in front of you. She smiled fondly at you, noticing your gaze on the pictures.

“He was such a handsome young man. So kind, too,” Brenda sighed. “You said you knew him? How is that possible?”

You took a deep breath, grabbing Brenda’s hand in your own and holding it gently. She needed as much comfort as you could give her. Then, you proceeded to tell her everything you knew.

You told her about how Danny had left the safety of his base to help what he believed to be civilians passing by who’s car broke down, how it had been Hydra who took him hostage, not mercenaries. You told her that he had been placed in the cell next to yours and he single handedly kept you sane with his light hearted jokes, his replenishing optimism, and boy-like wonder as he asked you to tell him all about the Avengers. 

He kept your mind where it needed to be, on your family, on something wonderful and hopeful and away from the horrible place you were.

You told her that while a thick concrete wall sat between you, he’d come to be a friend, a confidant, and you cared about him immensely. As Brenda’s eyes welled up with tears, you spared her the details of the days Danny was taken from his cell, how he was beaten for the information on you he eventually gave up.

She squeezed your hand, nodding along as you told her how brave he was in the end. You told her that you were right there with him and that you did all you could to make sure he knew he wasn’t alone, that his last moments were with someone who cared for him.

You didn’t tell her he had been killed as a means to break you, to strip away your last reason to live so your defenses were lowered enough to warp your mind into their making. She didn’t need to know why he was killed; it wouldn’t make any difference in her heart. Her son was still gone. You hoped that maybe just knowing he wasn’t alone all those months was enough to ease just an ounce of her suffering.

It was painstakingly silent as you finished, tears rolling down your own eyes as Brenda tried to gather herself again. After a moment, she slipped her hands from yours and your heart broke, certain that she was repulsed by you, but instead, her palm grazed over your cheek, brushing away the tears.

“Thank you, my dear,” she whispered, smiling sweetly through the tears on her face. “I can’t tell you how much that means to me. Danny admired the Avengers so much. I think that’s part of the reason he joined the Army, thought maybe he could be a hero like you.”

“He was,” you said firmly, sincerely and Brenda nodded.

“It’s comforting to know he had you through it all,” she concluded, letting her hand fall away. “I just wish there was a miracle for him, too.”

You clenched your jaw, knowing she was hoping that her son could come back from the dead the way you seemingly had. There was nothing you could say to change that.

Brenda glanced over her shoulder, looking out the back window to find Bucky demonstrating a right hook in slow motion, gesturing for Nathan to try, before he moved to correct his form. She chuckled softly under her breath.

“He’s a good one,” she said, and you raised an eyebrow. She clarified, “Sergeant Barnes. My Danny always knew he was more than the papers said, knew before all that came out about Hydra’s torture and brainwashing. He was quite proud of that, of how he defended him before anyone else.”

You nodded, brushing away more tears as they fell, a smile forming on your lips because that was so like Danny and it hurt in your chest.

“Mom!” Nathan’s voice rang through the kitchen, followed by the sharp close of the back door. He charged out into the living room, grinning wildly, wanting to show his mom the new moves Bucky taught him. Bucky trailed in behind, an apologetic grimace on his face.

“Sorry,” he mumbled, “tried to keep him outside but he was really excited to show you his right hook.”

“Check it out!” Nathan shouted in a deep voice that forced a laugh out of you. He demonstrated the move Bucky showed him, doing it about ten times over as Brenda cheered him on. The lingering remorse and grief in the room quickly turned to that of laugher and joy as Nathan tried to push Bucky into sparring with him.

“Ok little rascal, I think Sergeant Barnes has had enough of you,” Brenda laugh, sneaking up to hug Nathan away from Bucky, despite his protests.

“I don’t mind, honestly,” Bucky tried to reassure her but she waved him off. You smiled from the couch, slowly making your way over to Bucky and grabbing onto his hand.

Brenda led you back to the door, hand on your shoulder and she enfolded you into her arms before you stepped outside.

“Thank you,” she said into your ear, pulling back with a warm smile on her face. “Our home is always welcome to you, dear.”

You nodded, not trusting your own voice to speak and felt for Bucky’s hand behind you.

Even as you walked down the driveway, heading to the car you borrowed from Tony, the light squeeze against your palm, you felt a wave of relief swell in your chest. Bucky whispered how proud he was and you wondered if maybe Danny would be proud of you, too.

***

That night as you curled up against Bucky’s side, cool metal fingers trailing in careful patterns down your arm, you wondered if it was possible to be thankful for the worst months of your life. Breathing in the smell of faded leather from the jacket he’d worn all day and the soft thumping of his heart beneath your head resting on his chest, and your months of torture, of pain, of hopelessness and guilt faded away in an instant.

You’d take it again, endure hell and the worst men it had to offer, if it meant you could end up right here, in Bucky’s arms, listening to the gentle humming under his breath as he peppered kissed to your hairline, hands longing to memorize the feel of you against him.

The melody was one you knew well, a song on a list of tracks you'd strung together for him four years prior, and his hums were quiet, vibrating against you. You listened intently as the hums slowly turned to lyrics and his voice was just barely a whisper, low and quiet, but it was there. You curled up tighter to his side.

“Well, the night is still And I have not yet lost my will Oh and I will keep on moving 'till 'Till I find my way home”

You pressed a kiss to his collarbone, just to let him know how much you loved him, how you'd cross the ends of the earth for him, how much you appreciated him coming with you to face the mother of the young soldier who was killed to further Hydra’s vendetta. You could have said it aloud, but he knew, and you didn’t want to interrupt the soft tones of his voice for anything.

“When I need to get home You're my guiding light You're my guiding light”

His hand gently curled into your hair, palm cupping the side of your face, urging you to meet his eye. The most incredible shades of blue stared down at you, filled with an adoration and love and sincerity you’d never encountered from any other man because no man was quite like Bucky Barnes. He kissed you sweetly, chastely, and somehow it still felt like the first time you’d touched his lips, like every moment with him was precious, cherished.

You didn’t realize a tear had fallen down your cheek until Bucky pulled back, concern littering over the warmth in his eyes as he brushed away the tear as it fell.

“What’s wrong?”

“Nothing,” you replied honestly, smiling though your eyes were watering it, “just thinking about everything we’ve been through, how after all that hell, we managed to survive and now... I have you.”

“You’ve always had me, sweetheart,” Bucky sighed warmly, kissing your forehead, “you’ve had me since the beginning, since you started dragging me on morning runs and through the city.”

You laughed, wiping away the excess tears on his shoulder. “You were the one that showed up in your running gear that morning and asked to come with me, you know.”

Bucky shrugged, chuckling, “well, I couldn’t stand the idea of not being around you. Needed to spend time with you somehow. I would have taken anything. Might have even agreed to go with you to that hot yoga studio in the city you were obsessed with for a month.”

“Careful what you say, Barnes,” you teased.

“Point still stands,” Bucky smiled, wrapping his arms tighter around you. He lowered his voice, a little more serious though filled with the same sincerity and warmth, and said, “I’d do anything for you, sweetheart. Anything."

You knew. It was in the same way you’d do just about anything for him.

You’d watch old movies where the actors talked with an accent from their decades just because it reminded Bucky of his childhood. You’d take him up to the rooftop at three in the morning in the cold of winter to look at the stars when his nightmares got so bad not even you could calm him down with your touch alone. You’d call down to that restaurant in Brooklyn that used to be an apartment building and convince the owner to let you take Bucky upstairs for a few minutes because this place used to be his home and he deserved to see it again.

You’d tell him you loved him for the first time through the barrier of a glass wall as Hydra agents pulled you away from what you were sure was the last time you’d ever see him. You’d resurrect Cain and give yourself over to him to poke and prod and mutilate your body with scalpels and that godforsaken chair. You’d lose your mind to the soldier and commit unspeakable acts. You’d do anything if it meant you ended up here again.

If it brought you home.

Where you belonged.

To Bucky.

Draping a knee over his thigh and settling it between his legs, you pulled yourself flush against his side. Bucky smiled, his hand resuming the gentle patterns on your arm and shoulder. You sighed contently, reminding yourself every moment you could that this was real and it was Bucky under your touch.

A soft vibration in his chest, and your lips curved against him, listening as he started to sing again,

“So lead me on, and leave me strong Like the road I walk on When I need to get home You're my guiding light You're my guiding light”

---

Thank you so much for reading! ❤️ If you enjoyed this fic, please consider supporting me at my ko-fi account ✨

[aalissy]

In the Rain

Plz helppp. Idk why I wrote this. It’s toooo angsty for me!! Especially because I prefer fluffy Adrienette. But I couldn’t get this idea out of my head after the Miraculous Mexico account tweeted that Adrien and Kagami are secretly dating. I hope this isn’t true but only time will tell D:.

AO3

The droplets of rain trickled gently down her face, mixing with the tears that had already gathered there. First, she loses Chat Noir and now she loses Adrien. How in the world is she meant to go on? She turns to watch him leave, already feeling her vision burn under the onslaught of fresh tears. Before she can even attempt to open her mouth to call after him, Alya rushes down the stairs towards her, shaking her shoulders roughly, “What is wrong with you, Marinette!? Couldn’t you see that he was just waiting for you to tell him to stay?!”

She turns to look at her best friend, stuttering slightly, “But... but... I... he made his choice. What did you expect me to do,” Marinette said softly, swallowing against the harsh lump in her throat. 

“It doesn’t matter what I expected you to do! Who’s Adrien to you! A friend or more than a friend!? There will never be a better time to be clear with yourself, Marinette. Do you want him to leave or do you want him to stay?” Alya glared into her eyes fiercely, practically demanding an answer from her.

“U-uh, I...” her lips parted as realization crashed into her. She couldn’t let him go. He was the love of her life! She had to help him. She couldn’t just let his father take him away! Turning away from Alya, she took off, shouting after him, “Adrien! Stay!”

All the feelings she had attempted to bury deep inside quickly rose back up. She loved him, she loved him, she loved him, and this time she would not let him run away from her. There just had to be something she could do!

“I already lost Chat Noir, I can’t lose Adrien too,” Marinette spoke to both of the kwamis in her purse quickly, pulling out her phone to call him only to watch it die before she could even press the button. With a strangled shout, she caught sight of a bike leaning against the sidewalk and an idea struck her. She had to get to him. She just had too! With one quick tug, Marinette hopped onto the bicycle, shouting after Adrien’s car as the storm raged on around her.

There was a moment when she thought she was going to slip. A brief, terrifying moment where she thought all hope was lost and she’d never get the chance to tell him her feelings. Somehow, almost miraculously though, she regained her balance, using all of her extra strength as Ladybug to peddle after the car that seemed a million miles away.

“Adrien, please, wait!” Marinette screamed, praying he would be able to hear her against the roaring thunder. Sucking in a deep breath for courage, she lifted her hands up from the handlebars, waving quickly at the car in the hopes that the driver would see her.

All at once, the car came to an almost halting stop, almost making Marinette crash into the back of the vehicle. When Adrien came out, though, his forehead crinkling into an adorable, worried frown as he peered down at her, she knew that it was all worth it. Anything would be worth it for him.

He came towards her, arms outstretched like he wanted to reach for her, his frown deepening even more, “Marinette? What are you doing here? I need to get back to Paris. My father is waiting for me.”

“I...” she gasped in a harsh breath, panting for air, “I can’t... I needed to tell you...”

“What? Tell me what? Is something wrong?” Adrien came even closer to her and Marinette felt her cheeks pinken as she prepared to tell him what she’s been wanting to for years. 

“You can’t go,” she shook her head roughly, hoping that she could avoid his dazzling gaze for just a little longer, “We need you to stay. I-I need you to stay.”

Adrien blinked at her, his head tilting to the side as he looked at her curiously, “Did something happen?”

“No... I just... I-I love you, Adrien,” Marinette clenched her eyes shut, spitting the words out in a rapid pace in a half-hearted hope that he wouldn’t be able to hear them, “A-and I needed to tell you this now, before we go. Before you go back to Paris with all your photoshoots and fencing lessons and I go back to all my designs and responsibilities. A-and, um, I knew if I didn’t do this now, I-I wouldn’t ever be able too.”

There was a long stretch of silence. A long beat where Marinette had hope. Hope that when her eyes fluttered open, Adrien would be standing there staring at her with a look of love and adoration in his eyes. His hand would reach for hers, squeezing it gently, “I-I love you too, Marinette. I always have,” he’d whisper to her.

When she opened her eyes, however, that wasn’t what she got. Adrien’s face had practically crumbled and her heart tumbled drastically in her chest. No, no, no! Please tell me I didn’t just ruin our friendship, Marinette thought desperately to herself, her lip quivering as Adrien slowly rubbed the back of his neck nervously.

“O-oh, um, I had no idea,” he glanced away from her, gaze focused on the sidewalk instead of on her.

“Really?” she laughed loudly and awkwardly, cutting herself off before it could get any more uncomfortable, “I thought I was pretty obvious.”

“Not to me,” his gaze returned to hers. His emerald green eyes looking at her sadly. So, so sadly, “I actually thought that you liked Luka.”

Marinette bit down harshly on her lip, pushing down the sob that was threatening to break forth, “O-oh yeah?” Her voice broke a little and she cursed herself silently, already wishing that she could take back her confession.

“Mhm,” Adrien gave her a weak smile, shifting awkwardly on the sidewalk, “I um, well we were trying to keep it quiet actually, but uh, Kagami and I are dating now.”

A choked sob escaped her before she could stop it. She slapped a hand to her mouth, biting her tongue as even more tears billowed in her eyes. Adrien stepped closer to her, hand outstretched again as he looked at her worriedly. Swallowing down her pain and tears, she gave him a wobbly smile, “R-really? T-that’s great.”

“Yeah, listen Marinette, i-if I had known,” he took another step towards her, this time his hand presumably coming down to give her a friendly pat on the shoulder.

Marinette stepped back before he could touch her, though, arms coming up to wrap around herself protectively. She took in a shaky breath, looking away from him, “I-I think you should go now, Adrien. Your father’s waiting for you and I bet... I bet Kagami misses you.”

She heard him take another small step forward and she curled in on herself protectively, hugging herself tighter. Her gaze fixed resolutely on the building in front of her, not even glancing at the boy who had just torn her heart out. Adrien gave a quiet sigh before she heard him step away from her and walk back towards the car. Before he got in, Marinette thought she heard him whisper softly, “I’ll see you in Paris, Marinette.”

It was only after the car drove away and was a few metres away from her before she finally broke down. Marinette fell down onto the cold, wet sidewalk, not caring that the rain was seeping into her clothes. Sobs wracked her body, leaving her a heaping mess on the road. It was over. It was finally over. It all meant nothing to him. All the touches, the slow dances, the hugs, the smiles, the laughter. It was all useless. And of course she would lose both Chat Noir and Adrien on the same day. That was just her luck.

After a few more minutes of wallowing in rejection and pain, Marinette slowly stood up. She quickly checked around her but there were no signs of any akumas. Releasing a shaky, thankful breath, she swiped the heel of her hand against her eyes roughly, brushing away any last, remaining tears. 

With a deep gulp of air, she turned around to pick up the bike that she had left lying in the middle of the road. She needed to get to her best friend. Needed to cry into Alya’s arms so that she could start the healing process. Carefully, she got onto the bike, hearing another crack of thunder as she did so. It was fitting, she thought. She fell in love with Adrien in the rain, it only made sense that she would fall out of love with him in it too.

[thewidowsghost]

Fox - Chapter 22

Previously on Fox:

Seemingly satisfied, the man leaves the two women lying on the ground.

(Y/n) drags herself over to Natasha and Natasha, realizing what she was going to do, tries to drag herself away, but (Y/n) reaches her first.

(Y/n) grabs her ankle and Natasha screams at her to stop but (Y/n) just says, "Nat, I would give my life to save yours. You have so much more good to give this world. I did my part, now it's your turn," she just concentrates on healing Natasha's bullet wound.

It drains her and before the wound is completely healed, her head cracks against the pavement, black spots swimming in her eyes, she weakly snaps her fingers and a SHIELD COM appears in Natasha's hand. The only thing running through Natasha's mind is the hurt look (Y/n) had had on her face earlier, and it was tearing Natasha apart.

3rd Person POV

Natasha's green eyes widen and she scrambles over to (Y/n), cradling her bleeding head in her lap.

"T-this is A-agent R-rom-manoff, we need Med-Evac now," Natasha's voice cracks as the COM crackles to life.

"Agent Romanoff, what's the problem? Where are you?" Maria Hill's voice comes through the radio.

"(Y/n) and I-i were attacked just outside O-odessa, Stark's down," Natasha's voice cracks again. "I repeat, (Y/n)'s down," Natasha looks down at (Y/n), a tear running down her cheek.

"Shit!" Hill exclaims. "Natasha, stay with (Y/n) we'll be there as soon as possible. Keep (Y/n) alive."

"T-the engineer is dead," Natasha says.

"Focus on (Y/n) right now," Maria tells the former assassin. "Is she still breathing?"

"Yes, but the attacker shot her twice, broke her leg in," Natasha gently runs her hand down the broken parts of (Y/n)'s leg, (Y/n) crying out in pain and Natasha flinches, "I believe, two places. I think he broke her spine and her arm too."

"Hold on Natasha," Hill says, "we're five minutes out."

"Hurry, I don't think she can hold on much longer," Natasha warns Hill.

A few minutes later, a Quinjet lands on the asphalt about ten feet away from the two women. A young women with brown hair and brown eyes rushes out from the Quinjet with four other people in doctor's coats behind her wheeling a gurney.

"We need to get her on the gurney," the women has a slight British accent. "Keep her faced down. If her spine is broken, we don't want to worsen the damage." The woman turns to look at Natasha, her green eyes wide with shock. "Help Agent Romanoff onto the Quinjet as well."

The four in the doctor's coats lift (Y/n) as gently as they can onto the gurney, but she still cries out in pain. The British women helps Natasha to her feet and two of the doctors help her back onto the Quinjet, the other two wheeling the gurney onto the Quinjet as well.

The two doctors help Natasha into a seat near the gurney, then hurry to help the other three doctors hook (Y/n) up to IVs.

From out of nowhere, Agent Coulson comes and sits beside Natasha.

"Agent Coulson," Natasha turns to him.

"Call me Phil," he says and Natasha nods, turning back to look at (Y/n), lying unconscious on the gurney.

Coulson wraps an arm behind Natasha, pulling her head gently against his shoulder.

They stay that way for a while until they get back to where Natasha and (Y/n) had landed their Quinjet. An extra pilot jumps out of the Quinjet and pilots (Y/n) and Natasha's Quinjet.

"Simmons," Coulson says and the brown haired woman look up from her place by (Y/n)'s lower back, "what's the status on Stark?"

"She's got a dislocated shoulder, her leg is broken in two places, two gunshot wounds, a cracked skull, and a broken spine, but I believe she is going to be fine," Simmons answers.

"She has enhanced healing if that helps," Natasha says and the five doctors turn to her.

"Yes, that helps a great deal," Simmons walks away from (Y/n) and rummages through a medical cabinet. She pulls out a syringe and a bottle of clear liquid. "This will stimulate the healing gene in her so she should heal a lot faster." The British women turns to the four doctors. "We'll need to set everything in place first." The doctors nod and begin to set all of (Y/n)'s dislocated and broken limbs back in place, everyone wincing as (Y/n) lets out cries of pain, but when they're done, she relaxes onto the gurney below her. Her (E/C) eyes opening a little and meeting Natasha's green ones.

"Whatever you're going to inject me with, do it now," (Y/n) murmurs to the British doctor. "I'm not a big fan of needles."

"Good to see you awake Captain," Simmons says and (Y/n) turns her head slightly to look at her.

"Please, (Y/n)," (Y/n) murmurs, lifting her left wrist.

"Well then (Y/n), call me Jemma," Simmons says, injecting the liquid into (Y/n)'s vein.

"Go see to Natasha, I'll be alright now," (Y/n) says, resting her head back on the gurney.

Jemma walks over to Natasha and Coulson, sitting beside the redhead. "Did you get injured Agent Romanoff?" the brown haired woman asks.

"No," Natasha answers defiantly.

"She got shot," (Y/n) says. "I healed as much of it as I could, but I don't know if it healed all the way through."

"I'm fine," Natasha answers and (Y/n) frowns from her place on the gurney.

"Come on Nat," (Y/n) says. "I'm pretty sure we can trust Jemma, considering, well..." (Y/n) waves her left hand around weakly, "... the fact that I'm alive right now."

"Fine," Natasha lifts up her shirt to show the half healed bullet wound.

"Okay," Jemma studies the wound for a moment. "Did the bullet come out?" she asks.

"Yes, it did," Natasha answers.

"We should just need to wrap it up, and it should heal fine on it's own," Jemma says and one of the doctors goes and grabs a wrap of gauze and tossing it to the brown haired woman. Coulson removes his arm from around Natasha and Jemma wraps up Natasha's half healed bullet wound.

After a while, (Y/n) falls asleep face down on the gurney, not noticing when the two Quinjets land or being wheeled out of the one Quinjet, Natasha jogging beside her and being taken into the SHIELD facility, many agents looking at the woman as they take her to the Medical Wing of the facility.

Natasha sits by (Y/n)'s bedside in the Medical Wing for about half-an-hour before Fury and Hill walk into the room, Coulson following just behind.

"Agent Romanoff," Fury says, walking over and sitting beside Natasha. "Mission report, please," he requests and Natasha meets his gaze.

"Last night, we arrived in Odessa. Then we drove through the night to the facility in Iran. We picked up the engineer and I started the drive back to the Quinjet," Natasha pauses for a moment before continuing. "Then some man with a metal arm shot out our tires. (Y/n) punched a hole through the passenger side window and melted a hole through the door where she was sitting. The car went over the side of the cliff. (Y/n) told me to get the engineer out and finish the mission. We got a couple yards away but he overpowered her, a lot faster than I thought someone ever could overpower (Y/n)."

"Broke a couple bones, dislocated a shoulder, shot me a couple times," (Y/n) says and everyone turns to her, her words slurred slightly. "Shot the engineer straight through Nat," (Y/n) shifts slightly, wincing in pain before continuing. "What I didn't understand is why he just left. He could have taken - or killed - either one of us, but he just left us there."

There was a silence in the room for a moment, before (Y/n) speaks again.

"I've never met anyone like that before. He must've had some sort of super strength because I could barely pin him down. I mean, I understand that one of my arms was dislocated, but that wasn't natural. But I guess I'm not natural either," (Y/n) rests her head back down on the hospital bed, her left cheek resting against the thin pillow.

"We'll leave you to rest now," Fury says and he, Coulson, and Hill leave the room, leaving (Y/n) and Natasha alone.

"So-" (Y/n) begins but Natasha cuts her off.

"Did you mean it?" Natasha asks, and (Y/n) fixes her (E/C) gaze on Natasha.

"Mean what?" (Y/n) asks.

"What you said," Natasha says and a realization dawns in (Y/n)'s eyes.

"Yeah, I did," (Y/n) says and Natasha gazes at her for a minute before looking down at her hands in her lap.

"But why?" Natasha asks. "You have so much to come back to-"

"And that's the problem Natasha, you deserve to have that chance," (Y/n) murmurs. "And you do, you've got Clint, Laura, Lila and Cooper."

"But you wouldn't be there," Natasha says, moving her chair closer to (Y/n)'s bed. (Y/n) meets Natasha's emerald gaze.

"You know, if I wasn't lying here, I would give you a hug," (Y/n) says and Natasha smiles.

"Well, I guess you owe me a hug then," Natasha says and (Y/n) laughs softly.

"Maybe an official date as well," (Y/n) offers.

"What about our first one?" Natasha asks.

"I enjoyed that a lot, but I'd like to take you out to eat sometime," (Y/n) smiles at Natasha rolls her eyes.

"We've gone out to eat before," Natasha says.

"Man, it's hard to impress you, isn't it Romanoff?" (Y/n) asks playfully.

"I don't know, you seem to impress me quite a bit," Natasha says. "Anyway, I'm still angry at you about yesterday," (Y/n) groans, shifting lightly on the hospital bed.

"You're impossible," (Y/n) rolls her eyes at Natasha.

"You're alright, right?" Natasha asks.

"Yeah, I'll be fine," (Y/n) asks, Natasha meeting her gentle (E/C) gaze. "What about you?" (Y/n) asks.

"You did the work for me there," Natasha answers, and (Y/n) looks at her quizzically. "You practically healed the whole thing. Thanks for that," Natasha smiles at (Y/n).

"Well," (Y/n) shifts again on the hospital bed, "that's what I'm here for." Seeing the look on Natasha's face, she hastily says, "I'm joking."

Natasha rolls her eyes.

"I'm going to hate this whole situation, I hate hospitals and sleeping this way," (Y/n) waves her left hand around. Then she yawns.

"Well, Miss Stark, looks like you're going to have to live like this for a while," Natasha says as (Y/n) yawns.

"Just," (Y/n) pauses, her eyes closing, "don't fall asleep in that chair."

Word Count: 1621 words

So, the next chapter is going to be super fun. Sorry about the sad chapter, if you call it sad. I thought it was sad.

Anyway, I've gotta go, so...

See y'all!

Love,          Kaitlynn ❤😍

Imma tag peoples now: @confusinggemini612​, @gay-disaster826​, @thelastavenger-3000​, @osugahunnyicedtea​, @night-howl199​, @minicastle​, @happilyeverafterfantasybooks​, @billiebanner​, @me-and-sweatpants​, @scottjudah​, @scarlet-raccoon​, @whore-for-charlynch​, @nyx-aria, @night-howl199​, @brittanyrenne2004​, @juegamiri29​, @minicastle​, @peggycarter-steverogers​, @gay-disaster826​, @guitargodme, @avengers-avenging

[bigboomboi]

Anchor- Bakugo X Reader

Words: 3431

Warnings: Cursing and slight mention of blood

A snarl echoed through the training field and Y/N swiped at Momo, who easily avoided her claws. Y/N ducked under Momo’s staff, and punched her in the chest, sending her to the ground. Momo grunted, but didn’t miss a beat and tripped her attacker, taking her to the ground as well. 

Growling, Y/N easily caught the staff aimed for her face, using it to flip the creative quirked girl over into the ground before trying to stand herself. But again, Momo was quick, kicking Y/N in the back, launching her through the dirt.

Momo stood and froze, noting Y/N’s adopted stance. Crouched on all fours, teeth sharpening further than they already were, a stripped tail sprouting. Momo hesitated her advance on Y/N as her eyes flashed, pupils thinning. Momo instantly reached for the blow dart, out of habit and fear.

But thankfully, Y/N shook her head, struggling to hold back her transformation. She slowly took several deep breaths before glaring at Momo again before charging her. Momo tightened her grip on her staff, seeing that Y/N stayed human. 

Dodging the swing of the metal bar, Y/N slashed at Momo again, her attacks much more frantic than before. She had to exert the unused aggravation somehow. So when Momo created a pair of restraints and snagged Y/N’s hands, Y/N simply vaulted the girl and yanked her handcuffs into Momo’s neck to choke her. To which she responded by reaching back doing the same thing with her own weapon.

The girls stood, back to back, awkwardly choking each other out for several moments before the need to shift returned. Much stronger than the first time. Panicking, Y/N backflipped over Momo again and tried to pull away from the tangle of limbs they were.

Her opponent noted the panic in Y/N’s eyes and released her, to kick her again. Sending her across the field before jumping back herself, giving Y/N space. And once again, Y/N stayed crouched, growling and panting hard. She was going to shift, she could feel it. Her grip on her form was slipping, so she did the best thing at the time.

She slammed her head into the ground.

“Y/N!” Momo gasped, holding herself back from moving to check on her at least until Y/N collapsed to the ground, effectively ending the match.

In mere moments the class surrounded the concussed student. “You can’t knock yourself out, everytime you almost fully shift, Y/N….” Aizawa muttered, rolling his eyes. 

Y/N groaned, and closed her eyes. “Yeah, yeah. Give me a better option…”

“Figure out how to control your full shift.” Aizawa advised her.

"But, I can’t. I actually can’t.” She whimpered as Momo helped her up. “I get tranquilized everytime I full shift.”

Her quirk was an animal transformation, to be more specific she shifts into the world’s deadliest big cat. A Bengal Tiger. Coming from a family of shapeshifters, she was the only one with the quirk that couldn’t control her full shift.

“Fine, then in addition to the homework tonight. Brainstorm on some ways to keep a whole of your mind when you use your quirk.” Aizawa ordered, before dismissing the class. “Get to the nurse’s office.”

Later, back at the dorms Uraraka gently prodded, the bruises on Y/N’s cheeks with a cool towel. Despite the fact that Recovery girl fixed her broken nose and slight concussion, she advised Y/N to allow her bruises to heal naturally, for she far too exhausted to take in anymore accelerated healing. Y/N hissed and jerked away from her friend’s fingers when she poked a particularly sore bruise.  

“Okay, what if you wear a shock collar that tases you bv every few minutes.” Denki offered.

“She’s not actually an animal!” Mina punched his arm. 

“Technically … She is…” 

Somehow her extra homework turned into a dorm discussion, when they all gathered in the living room to hangout. As much as Y/N appreciated the help, they were getting nowhere. But the ideas they came up with were surprisingly creative. A safe word, a whistle, netting her until she calmed down. Really, even the shock collar wasn’t a bad idea.

“We could just spray you with water?” Kirishima commented. “Like what people do when their cats are being bad.”

“Yes, Kirishima. Let’s spray the rabid, Bengal Tiger with water and see if you don’t get mauled.” Y/N grumbled.

“She’s not some stupid house cat. She’s a deadly Tiger that can’t control herself.” Bakugo grumbled from next to her.

“Yes, thank you for the reminder, Mr. Anger Issues and Superiority Complex.” Y/N huffed, trying to move away from Uraraka’s caring hands.

“At least I don’t break my own nose to avoid mauling my friends.” He glared at her.

“Don’t worry, when you’re in the ring, I won’t.” She snapped back.

His hand crackled at the threat. “You wouldn’t get close to me, shitty woman.”

“Let’s see about that.” She snarled, her teeth elongating. Despite the slight crush she harbored for him, he was still an ass and she wouldn’t let him get away with talking down to her.

“O-okay! We should get back to finding a way to control yourself.” Midoriya panicked.

“Do whatever, I don’t give a fuck about it.” Bakugo broke eye contact and stood off the couch.

“Asshole.” Y/N mumbled, glaring while he stomped off. “But anyway. Any more ideas? Or is the shock collar the best thing we got?”

After a moment of silence, Kirishima perked up again. “What about an anchor or something. Like, from that american show with the werewolf dude and his nerdy sidekick.”

“Are you talking about Teen Wolf? Where he dated a chick that hunted his kind?” Jiro raised an eyebrow.

“Uh, yeah. That.” He scratched the back of his neck. “But think about it. In the show, the werewolves needed an anchor to keep a hold of themselves. To keep them grounded.Like the Scott guy had his girlfriend as his anchor.”

“First off… She dumped him. Second… I don’t have a girlfriend. Or a boyfriend.” Y/N sighed.

“Do you want one?” Denki asked hopeful only to be nailed in the face by a couch pillow. 

“Okay, yes, she did break up with him, but then he became his own anchor.” Kirishima added. “Remember yourself, who you are, where you are, why you’re here. Stuff like that. Or another person, a family member, Mina. Someone or something that means more to you than anything else.”

“An anchor…” She chewed her lip. What the fuck was her anchor going to be.

“Today, Y/N. Bakugo.” Aizawa matched up. “This time. I will be the only one with a tranq. Y/N you are to fully shift before the match is over.”

Y/N nodded, before turning to Mina, who gently adjusted the collar around Y/N’s neck. “Alright, Denki, remember only three time every minute if I’m wild, okay. Please don’t fry my brain.”

“Got it.” He nodded.

Y/N took a deep breath and stepped out on the field, standing across from Bakugo. He looked pointedly at her collar and scoffed at the fact that she actually went with the idea of it. His palms crackled and she activated her quirk partially, nails and teeth sharpening and amping her speed.

“Come on kitty, kitty, kitty.” He taunted before charging her.

She easily dodged his blasts, trying her best to find an opening, before he backed her into a corner. Snarling, she grabbed an explosive hand, aimed for her face and yanked him close only to thrust her foot into his chest. She smirked and followed his falling figure.

He grunted when he landed, but still managed to avoid her pounce. As he rolled over, he barely managed to slam his crackling palm into her side. Sending her rolling and gasping.

“Oi, I thought you were gonna let me have it, stupid cat.” He mocked.

“I’m just waiting for you to show me a reason to use my full quirk.” Y/N shrugged, hiding the pain in her ribs.

He growled and charged her again, this time she stood her ground, blocking his blows to the best of her ability. She easily ducked under his first and punch him in the stomach, before twisting to kick his side, pushing him to the ground, but he just swiped her legs from under her as he fell.

He was quick to pin her to the ground, sitting on her, and start slamming his exploding fists next to her head as she dodged. She growled, her want to shift pounding at the back of her skull. But she forced it down, knowing he was just toying with her, trying to piss her off enough to shift. She reached up and grabbed his collar and yanked his forehead into hers.

He groaned, dizzy, from the sudden head trauma, giving her an easy window to flip their position. She mimicked his own attack from moments before, but instead actually connected her fists to his jaw. Several hits in, Bakugo snagged her arm and flipped them again, twisting her arm out straight behind her back.

She cried out, and struggled against his grip but he only pulled tighter. Y/N panicked, he was going to break her arm if she didn’t pull out and the thought forced her fight or flight to kick in. She was shifting and needed to get him off.

Turning her head she glared at the foot next to her head and bit down on his calf muscle. He cursed, relinquishing some of his pull on her arm. She took the opportunity to free herself, rolling over, definitely straining the joint in her shoulder and using that same arm to push him into the dirt before scrambling to put a few feet in between them.

Like before with Momo, Bakugo watched Y/N crouch and struggle to control herself. As did the class, cheering for her to shift. She closed her eyes to steady her breathing as bones started to crack. Maybe if she transformed slowly she’d keep a hold.

Bakugo took his chance while she shifted and rushed her, palms popping.

A large paw extended claws forced him to duck, but not quick enough as a larger than normal Bengal Tiger pinned him to the ground. She snarled at him, warningly and opened her mouth to bite him, but she jerked as a sharp jolt was sent through her neck.

Bakugo was quick to thrust his foot into her chest, and roll away from her. She was already struggling to keep a hold of her mind, he saw the wild flicker in her eyes. 

“Y/N, remember to control it. Not let it control you.” Aizawa called to her, but she only turned to growl at him. She was completely gone already, and the shocks in her neck were only pissing her off.

She crouched and narrowed in on Bakugo before pouncing. Even with several feet between them, he barely managed to dodge her claws. She spun sharply to follow his dodge and leaped to bite him. He cursed and punched her with an exploding fist. She yelped and rolled through the dirt, her shock collar falling off, destroyed from his blast.

Now there was nothing to pull her back to reality. All that was running through her head was to attack. And she couldn’t help the idea, her conscience was slowly drowning in the instinct to hurt him. She growled at herself and tried to shake her mind clear but it didn’t help, nothing helped. 

She mentally felt faint, and seemed to be blacking out. Though she felt her body rush forwards and attack Bakugo, she couldn’t focus on the fact that she drew blood, tearing through his hero suit. Just the suffocation of her shift.

She was fading…

Further…

And further…

“Shit! Y/N, stop fucking biting the gauntlet!”

Blinking, she felt like an alarm went off as Bakugo shouted at her. She blinked, eyes locking on to his panicked ones. He struggled a bit more before he noticed her growls silenced. He froze looking at her.

“Y/N?” He gambled.

She blinked again, jaw loosening on his arm. She noted the blood on his cheek, an obvious scratch from her claws. Y/N slowly let go of his grenade piece and whimpered looking him over completely. He was bloody and bruised, thanks to her lack of control.

“Stop, stupid cat!” He noticed her backing away and quickly stopped her. “You’re doing it. You’re in control.”

He could clearly see the panic in her eyes, if he let her succumb to the overwhelming emotion, she’d lose herself again and he knew that. She whimpered when he reached out to her and he paused. Y/N heard a shout from behind her, it was only their attempts to call out to her conscience, and she whimpered shaking her head. Her grasp slipping again.

Bakugo sighed and grabbed her, his fingers deep in her fur. “Relax, Kitten. Look at me and only me.”

She did as she was told and tried to ignore the calls from the class. “See, you’re doing fine. You feel this?” She wasn’t sure if he meant his comforting fingers petting her or the feeling of control she had, but she jerked her head yes. “Remember it. Anytime you shift, okay? Don’t panic or you’ll lose it.”

She whined, licking apologetically at her bit mark on his arm. He pushed her face away, a slight pink colour tainting his cheeks. She licked and nipped at him playfully, feeling more comfortable now.

“Stop licking me, shitty woman!” He kept pushing away at her snout while she tried to lick his wounds. She ignored his protests and continued, now that she had better control, her emotions and feelings were multiplied and she couldn’t help but let them bubble over. Disguising her kisses as simultaneously apologizing and thanking him. 

Suddenly Y/N yelped and glared at her side, where the tranquil dart stuck her. Bakugo followed her gazed and cursed, reaching to yank it out but it was too late. She’d already collapsed into his lap, revealing Aizawa making his way to them.

“What the hell was that for?” Bakugo shouted, before returning his attention to the tiger whimpering in his lap. “Shit, Kitten.”

“She wasn’t in control.” He answered, easily.

“Yes, she was.” Bakugo sighed as she passed out. “She had control…” 

It had been a week since her match with Bakugo and Y/N had managed to avoid all contact with him since. No matter how hard he tried, she always seemed to slip out of his fingers. Even their friends started trying to trap her into seeing him.

It wasn’t that she was scared or anything, she just didn’t know what to do. She had the intense urge to touch him in someway, anyway. Holding his hand, hugging him… kissing him. But she knew that wouldn’t end well if she acted on her feelings.

“Y/N, babes, it’s us. We’ve brought dinner.” Urakaka’s voice called through her door.

Y/N sighed and stepped to the door. “You’re not trying to trick me again are you, cause I will bite.”

A moment of silence answered her before an actual voice did. “No, Y/N. It’s just us.”

Slowly, she opened the door to see her friends. She stepped aside to let them in and accept the curry Urakaka offered. They all sat and contemplated a way to start the conversation they’d all been putting off.

Finally, “What the fuck happened with Bakugo?” Mina yelped, tired of the pressure in the room.

“Nothing.” Y/N shrugged, pushing her food around on her plate. “I lost control and hurt him, like I always do.”

“He seems to think differently.” Jiro hummed.

“Yeah, well he was probably delirious from me slamming his head on the ground.” Y/N said.

Urakaka huffed. “Why are you trying to ignore the fact that he helped you control yourself?”

“Because, now I can’t shift without the thought of him in my head. If I try to think of anything other it will always revert back to him.” She snapped. “And it’s not just him! It’s wanting him. It’s my feelings for him and now I’m fucking scared to talk to him because when I fucking see him and want to run into his arms becuase I- fuck.” 

“Because what, Y/N. You gotta figure this out, because at this point, we’re going to tie you up, put you in a box and give you to him like a present.” Mina threatened.

“That sounds kinky, ribbit.” Tsu teased.

“Can’t I just avoid him forever.” Y/N whined.

“No!” They all quipped.

Hours later, once Y/N was sure everyone had gone to bed she slipped down to the kitchen. She didn’t finish her dinner, but that didn’t mean she’d waste it, she’d just take it for lunch so she could run straight to her hiding spot of the day. But first she had to find her bento.

Muttering quietly, she checked the lower cabinets, where they normally were placed, but found the area empty. She opened and closed each cabinet until she found them. On the very top shelf. 

Y/N grunted stretching to try and reach the lunch boxes, even though it was futile. She gave up and was about to climb the counter, knowing there was no one around to stop her- except the warm hand on her back. She froze, the light scent of warm caramel and a strong chest pinned her before her bento was placed in front of her.

For a long moment, they stayed frozen. While he hoped she’d turn and look at him, she was trying to will him to disappear. While she felt wonderfully serene with him so close, she needed him to leave. She wasn’t ready to face him yet. Not that she thought she’d ever be.

“Would you fucking look at me already?” Bakugo urged. Y/N shook her head, frantically, not trusting her voice.

“I’m not mad, if that’s what you’re worried about, idiot.” Again she shook her head.

“Then, for the love of fuck! Why are you avoiding me, shitty woman?” He snapped.

“Because I’m scared!” She admitted finally turning to face him.

“Like I said, I’m not mad at you.” He tried again.

“That’s not it, I’m just scared!” She glared at him. 

“Scare of what, Y/N?”

She opened her mouth to answer, but chickened out and pressed her lips together looking away. As panicked as she was, his proximity still calmed her. Tears welled in her eyes, not knowing what to do with her feelings. So she did what was best at the time; she slammed her head into his chest.

“Oi!” He grunted, ready to snap at her again, but paused when she mumbled something into his chest. “I can’t understand you into you whisper into my shirt, stupid.”

Taking a shaky breath, she spoke again, louder this time. “You’re my anchor.”

He furrowed his eyebrows, confused. “I’m your what?”

“You’re… ‘Someone that means more to you than anything else.’ An anchor, keeping me grounded, when I shift.” She explained softly. 

Bakugo paused for a minute, thinking carefully of what to say next as to not scare you away. “Why me?”

“Because… I…” Y/N stopped and tried her best to build up the strength to say it.

“Kitten,” He tugged her chin up to look her in the eyes before repeating her question. “Why me?” 

As cliche as it sounded, she couldn’t hide it or lie about it. There was nothing she could do about it. “Because I’m in love with you and I’m scared because I don’t know what I’ll do when you leave.”

She closed her eyes, bracing for his laugh. For rejection. Y/N felt his hand squeeze her hip and his nose bumped into her gently. She took a deep breath as he pressed her into the counter before his lips brushed over hers fleetingly.

“Who said I was going to leave?” 

Bonus:

Y/N and Bakugo laid cuddle together on the couch, watching a movie. Y/N was slowly dozing off, thanks to the warm fingers rubbing her back. At least she was until-

“I thought you said you didn’t want a boyfriend?” Denki pouted at the couple on the couch.

This time Bakugo nailed him in the face with the couch pillow. “Fuck off, Sparky.”