#so i’ll get the physical copy in 3 weeks

[not-rome]

officially got 2 degrees. associates in media studies & bachelors in creative writing

time to not be able to use either of my degrees, especially my bachelors to find a job 😎🤠

[send-me-a-puffalope]

why did my teachers think it was okay to give us like one single weekend to finish all of our midterm projects and study for our tests.

[loneguitars]

me telling myself I will get Void and Lemony’s moomin care packages ready and sent out before May hits.

looks and sees it’s almost May and I’m not even closing to finishing up their drawings and extra things im making them. 😭

my goddddddd I’m sorry lovelies. I swear I didn’t forget.

[dustofthedailylife]

A Gift For You

→ Masterlist || → Taglist

Pairing: Alhaitham, Cyno, Heizou x (gn!) Reader

Summary: They plan to give you something for White Day (Info: White Day is the counterpart to Valentine's Day where you usually get the person who got you something, something in return.)

Tags: Fluff, best friends to lovers, pining, mild cursing, very slight angst for Heizou and Cyno at first but also not really, they have good intentions haha!

A/N: This is my White Day gift for @feeblescholarmyass! I hope you like it :3

ALHAITHAM

Two knocks on the door of your office snapped you out of your work-induced haze. 

You’ve been working non-stop on this project for the Akademiya for months now and have only been allowing yourself breaks to eat or sleep. Well, to be fair, sleep was negligible too, seeing as you only got around three hours of it per night for a couple of weeks now. 

What didn’t help was that you just couldn’t get a hold of a super rare edition of a book that was practically essential for this paper. However, the physical copy was lost to the void of the library as it was never returned. And since the Akasha terminal no longer worked you also couldn’t fall back on that.

“Come in.” you answer, rubbing your eyes quickly in a futile attempt to make yourself look less tired. But deep down you knew there was nothing that could hide the deep purple eye bags you’d been carrying around like a designer accessory the past couple of weeks.

You continued to read through one of the many books on your desk as the door was opened quietly and you heard long strides approach your desk.

“Are you seriously still working on this?” a familiar voice asked reprimandingly.

You looked up into the face of Alhaitham who looked down at you in a less than amused and almost accusatory way. You genuinely didn’t have time for this now, as much as you would rather spend every free minute you had with him instead.

“Well yes, I am. Things have been going slower than I had planned and the deadline is breathing down my neck.” you sighed burying your head into the book you had been skimming through prior. “What did you want?”

“You are going to take a break.” Alhaitham remarks. This wasn’t a plea, he was leaving no room for protest. He snatched the book out of your hand and placed it on a table out of your reach.

“Hey! Alhaitham! You can’t do that. I need to finish this.”

“Yes, I can. And I will.” he crossed his arms in front of his chest. “When was the last time you ate?”

Well, damn. There was nothing you could hide from him, was there? He always saw right through you. Always had. One of the perks of being friends with a genius, you thought to yourself. And your silence following his question seemed to confirm his suspicions once again.

“Come on. Let’s go to the Tavern, I’ll treat you to lunch.”

You knew there was no point in resisting so you tagged along and unsurprisingly as always, he was right. Getting out of your cramped office and breathing in some fresh air was balm for your soul.

You sat down outside of the Tavern, both ordering a meal and talking about some recent research you both were interested in. Well, it was mostly just you ranting about your project and the sheer stress the lack of one certain book was causing you, but he listened to everything attentively. 

You once again came to realize what an incredibly calming effect talking to him had on you. Despite how fast your heart started drumming inside of your chest every single time without fail. You suspected that he likely would never be interested in you beyond the friendly relationship you had with him and you didn’t mean to destroy what you both had by laying your feelings for him bare. So you simply kept them locked within your heart and simply basked in his presence whenever you could.

“Oh, since we’re on the topic. I bought something the other day. This is for you.” Alhaitham suddenly pulled a book out of his bag and slid it across the table. You only had to glance at the cover briefly before you realized what it was and your eyes became as wide as saucers.

“Th-this is… the super rare copy of Ancient Nomad Language and Symbolism! How did you–?”

You were awestruck. You had no idea how he managed to get his hands on a copy. It was as if this book had vanished from the face of the earth. Aside from the fact that you could no longer buy it either or just for an extremely inflated price. How in the world did he get his hands on this?

“Let’s just say, I have my methods.” he replied with a hint of a smug smile painted across his lips.

“How much did you pay for this? I promise I’m going to pay it back–”

“No need.” he shook his head to deny your offer. “Consider it a gift.”

“Thank you. Thank you so much! You have no idea how happy this makes me.” you blurt out, almost brought to tears by this act of kindness. With this, your project was saved, and after so long you could finally see a light at the end of the tunnel.

“Well, in fact, I do. Considering that you didn’t shut up about this book for the better half of a month now and everyone you spoke to knew how much you wanted it.” he stated factually.

“Hey! No need to get all snarky with me now, when I just want to express my gratitude!” you chuckle and playfully roll your eyes, prompting him to smile smugly in a barely noticeable way once more.

“It was my pleasure. Besides, today is White Day, so it was only logical to get you something.” he remarks and he continued to drink his coffee entirely unbothered as if he didn’t just insinuate the most unbelievable thing you had ever heard. He surely misunderstood something here, right?

“Uhh–” you pause. “You know what this day is for right?”

“Naturally.”

You felt like your heart was about to jump right out of your chest any second. What did he mean naturally?! Was what you deemed impossible actually true and…

“Do you… like me?” you whisper, too scared and unable to speak any louder because it felt like all air had been knocked out of your lungs.

“Looks like you’ve finally caught on as well. I thought you’d never realize.”

“What do you mean?”

“Why do you think I repeatedly asked you out for lunch or dinner? Or why do you think I keep returning your books for you if you’re very capable of doing so yourself? Amongst other things.” he enumerated.

“Well yes, but that’s what friends do.” you retorted confusedly.

“Then let me spell it out for you.”

He put his cup down on the table and leaned forward. He stared deeply into your eyes before ushering three words you’ve always, deep down, longed to hear from his lips.

“I love you.”

CYNO

Three Matra ringing on your door at 10 in the morning was not what you had expected to see today, but here you were nonetheless. They had arrived just as you were about to head to the Akademiya for work but effectually canceled all plans you had made.

“Good morning?” you questioningly asked, raising an eyebrow at them. “Can I help you?”

“We would like to ask you to accompany us back to the Akademiya.”, they plainly stated, signaling you to follow them.

You quickly grabbed your keys and tracked behind them with unease pooling at the pit of your stomach and a violently beating heart. 

What could the Matra possibly want from you? Did you conduct some illegal research? Did someone turn you in for plagiarism to save their own skin? Or did it have something to do with academic funds? As far as you were aware, the answers to all of these questions were no.

You didn't commit any serious academic offense to your knowledge and never planned to do so in the first place. But being called in by the Matra always had something to do with that, so naturally, you had a very bad feeling about this and couldn’t help but desperately try to find the answer to it in your head before you’d arrive.

You knew your best and long-time friend Cyno, was the General Mahamatra but even he wouldn’t show mercy if you seriously screwed something up. You knew he didn’t take academic offenses lightly - it didn’t matter who it was who committed them. He dealt out punishment equally.

The way to the office seemed like it was taking forever and many people along the way to the Akademiya threw you pitiful glances and were whispering as you were escorted by the Matra.

Once you arrived at your destination you were led into the General Mahamatra’s office. The Matra who had escorted you were bowing their head down once before they left you and Cyno, who was standing behind his desk, alone.

“There you are!” he stated, sounding surprisingly cheerful. Well, at least compared to usual anyway. He certainly didn’t seem sinister or as if he was out for your head.

He walked around his desk and came to a halt just in front of you. You slightly twitched as he put one hand on your shoulder and looked right into your eyes. This entire situation was odd, to say the least.

What didn’t help was that the warmth that radiated off his hand on your shoulder was entirely distracting to you right now and made the blood rush to your cheeks and your heart skitter in your chest.

“U-uhhh…” you stammered, unsure what to say or do.

“Do you still remember the special animated Genius Invokation card of Tighnari you got me last month?”

What? Was something wrong with it?

“Uhm… yes, of course, I do.” you reply, uncertain as to where this was leading.

He nodded as his lips curved into a small smile. “Follow me.”

You trailed behind him out of the Akademiya and along the streets towards the outskirts of Sumeru city. You remained silent the entire way, intimidated and unsure about his intentions. You couldn’t help but wonder where he was taking you and whether he was intending to exercise his judgment where no one was able to bear witness to it.

He came to a halt next to a small, run-down house at the border of the city and leaned against the fence there, crossing his arms over his chest and gazing below himself. You cautiously came to a halt as well, making sure you maintained some distance from him.

“So… w-what did I do?” you carefully inquired.

“Well,” Cyno cleared his throat as if he was struggling to find the right words. He stepped a little closer to you once again, taking your slightly trembling hands in his. “You stole something.”

“What? I did n–”

“You stole my heart.” he interrupted both your words and ability to form clear thoughts.

You parted your lips with the intention to say something but every word seemed to have died in your throat. You knew he was one to often speak cryptically so you were uncertain about the true meaning behind his words.

“What?”

He took a deep breath as if he was preparing to say something impacting before pointing toward the fence he had been leaning on with a dead-serious face.

“I fence-y you!”

At this point, you couldn’t help but chuckle. The hilarity of this entire situation was unbelievable. Not only did he have you worried sick he also chose to confess to you after years of pining with some stupid pun.

“Did you seriously lead me here just because there is a fence here?”

“Curses. I feared you would not understand… see fence-y sounds like fancy which means I–”

You quickly pulled him in by his neck and pressed your lips softly against his, successfully stopping him from explaining his joke. The feeling of his lips on yours was something you had dreamed of for so long. When he slung his arms around your waist the endorphins rushing through your bloodstream made your head swim and you felt as if your heart was about to burst out of your chest. You wondered if he felt the same.

“That was supposed to be my gift to you,” he remarked with a smile, leaning his forehead against yours. “but you beat me to it.”

You playfully punched his chest with a chuckle. “Idiot. You have no idea how much you had me scared to death with this entire scheme of yours. I fence-y you, too”

“Allow me to make it up to you again. Do you like raisins?”

You questioningly raised an eyebrow at him, wondering what he was up to this time.

“No? How about a date, then?”

Someone seriously needed to remind you again why you fell for this guy.

HEIZOU

You were walking through the streets of Hanamizaka to run some errands when you bumped into your long-time friend aka. the best detective in town. Or maybe even in the entirety of Inazuma.

“Would you look who it is!” you perceived the familiar voice coming from your right.

You turned your head only to spot the familiar tuft of auburn locks and the pair of mischievous green eyes that always made their owner look like he was up to no good.

“Heizou!” you cheered, hugging him tightly.

“It’s a good thing I run into you actually. I’m onto something and you’re just the person who could help me out.” he remarked.

“Oh, is that so?” you asked stemming your hands on your hips proudly, raising an eyebrow at him.

“Indeed.”

“So, what do you need from me, Mr. Detective?” you tease.

“Alright. So, as you may or may not know it’s White Day. I’m looking for a present for someone since I’m going on a date, and I want to get something for them.” he explained. 

You had to try your hardest to not drop your smile. It almost faltered just now, but you couldn’t let your disappointment show. He didn’t know you had feelings for him, so to him, you were still nothing more than his best friend. Obviously, he would come to you with something like this. It’s also on you for not telling him about your feelings for him, too.

As much as your heart ached while thinking about it, you simply had to try to be a supportive friend in this situation. Even if it would most likely prove to be a challenge. Both for your heart and also to hide your dislike about this from him, since he was generally very perceptive. It was in the job description after all and he was one of the best in his field.

“So what do you say?” he interrupted your train of thought. “Will you help me?”

“Sure!” you agree, faking a smile. 

You followed him through the streets of Inazuma City walking past several restaurants and storefronts continually catching yourself getting lost in your own thoughts while he was talking. 

Your mind was way too occupied with reproaching yourself for not opening up about your feelings. Would you still be able to look him in the eyes when you soon saw him with someone else by his side? Or would you be strong enough to still be as close to him as you are now, despite your aching heart? These were questions the future you would have to eventually find answers to, but for now, you decided you should focus on helping him.

“Which restaurant would be a good option for a dinner date?” he pondered tapping his chin with his index finger.

“Well, I do like Uyuu Restaurant just across the bridge from here. But then again, it tends to be rather crowded on holidays. So maybe Kiminami Restaurant instead? And quite honestly, the food is also better there in my opinion.” you advised.

“I see. Great!” Heizou cheered writing some things down in his notebook.

“So…” he began again after he was done taking notes. “Now for the present. I have no clue what to get them, yet.”

“Well, what a lousy detective you are if you can’t even sneakily ask them about what they would want.” you teased.

He raised his eyebrow and crossed his arms in front of his chest, acting playfully offended at your remark.

“Hey now! No need to get personal! Besides, that would only be the last resort! Anyway, hypothetically speaking. Imagine I’d get you something for White Day. What present would you want?”

For Archon’s sake, did he really have to have you imagine that? Getting a present from him on White Day would be a dream come true so he could practically get you anything and you would be head over heels for him all over again. But naturally, you couldn’t just outright say that.

“I don’t think this should be about what I would want. You should consider what they could want instead.”

“Hmm. I see your point. I could just ask them directly, I suppose?” he proposed tapping his chin as if deep in thought.

“No numbnuts! That’s not something you just ask them. It’s supposed to be a surprise, you know?”

“But then it may be even more important if you could give me an idea knowing what you would want. To gather some… inspiration, basically. I have to consider all possibilities after all.” he lightly bumped his finger on your forehead and smirked slyly. “So what would you want… jewelry? books? something to decorate your home with perhaps? Or maybe–”

“I fear I may not be of much help. I genuinely wouldn’t know what I would want.” you quickly interrupted.

Aside from wishing to be the object of affection of the man in front of you. But it was probably better if you buried that hope alongside your feelings for him once and for all.

What you were dying to say to him for a long time, had died in your throat the moment he told you he was going on a date. And as much as you honestly wanted to help him with this, you couldn’t recommend him something in good faith when it made your heart painfully throb the way it did right now.

“Hmmm.” he pondered looking at the ground with crossed arms. “That’s a shame, I’d immediately know what I’d want.”

“Oh? And what would that be, Detective?” you replied cheekily, quickly trying to distract yourself from the aching feeling in your chest.

“You.”

“What?” you falter.

“Do you happen to be free later?”

“Y-you–?”, you stammered.

“I set you up? Hmm, I suppose you could say I did. Sorry about that, but I had to find something out first.” he hummed, leaning in a little closer with a smug smile before whispering in your ear. “And I’m pretty sure I connected all the dots by now, did I not, sweetheart?”

Do not repost, copy, translate or edit - © dustofthedailylife || reblogs, comments, and asks about Genshin or my fics are always greatly appreciated and motivate me! Maple dividers are mine - do not copy.

[emotionoitme]

safe in your skin

part two of about a girl

carmy berzatto x reader (no use of y/n)

warnings: friends with benefits, bdsm dom/sub undertones, age gap, alcohol & tobacco use, lots of dirty talk, fingering, oral sex (m receiving), unprotected vaginal sex (use condoms!!), choking, mutual pining

wc: 7.5k

a/n: thank you so much for the support on the last chapter! i was literally kicking my legs twirling my hair reading through the replies. please enjoy some more nastiness!! and lots of yearning ofc <3

title fight - safe in your skin

job hunting was a grueling task, no matter how lucky you get— the girl could feel this physically, shoulders slumped and feet aching. she had dropped off applications at 4 different places that day, eager to start a new job as soon as possible. what she didn’t expect was places seemingly desperate for help saying they’d up to a week to get back to her. she dejectedly checked the time on her phone, strolling down the relatively empty sidewalk. it was a little after 3, meaning she’d have time to check out a few more options before heading home. she wasn’t necessarily enthusiastic about the task, either, searching up bars in her vicinity to take an application to. she finds a smaller looking club on google maps 2 miles away and pulls up walking directions. she was looking for a change of pace, but a club was familiar and she catches a second wind as her steps slow in pace, smelling a delicious aroma heavy in the sunny afternoon air. she raises her head from the phone, looking around to locate the source of the smell. she continues forward, looking in the window of a small business. a makeshift sign taped on the glass reads, “the bear”, name underlined, and “help wanted”. she puts her phone back into her pocket, no longer curious about the club she had found. she opens the front door, entering the small establishment and letting her senses be overtaken by the mouth watering scent emanating from the kitchen. the push of the door rings a small bell, and after being inside alone for a few moments, a tall man comes from the kitchen to stand behind the counter. 

“hey, sweetheart, we’re closed for dinner prep. you can come back in an hour.” he tells her, voice booming. she offers him a smile, approaching the counter. 

“i’m actually here for the help wanted sign. are you guys taking applications?” she asks, pushing a piece of hair behind her ear. 

the man lets out a hardy laugh, “you wanna work here? what, victoria’s secret isn’t hiring?” he asks her, scanning her up and down. her small smile drops, rolling her eyes. 

“never mind,” she goes to turn, leave, and take her chances with the club nearby. 

“ah, hey, hey, hey, wait,” he calls after her, “i’m sorry, i’m being an asshole.”

 she shrugs, not entirely disagreeing. he puts a hand out, gesturing to stay, “wait right here and i’ll get carmy.” the tall man disappears behind the kitchen doors, and she takes a quick opportunity to look around, noting the old fashioned decor, a few parts of the restaurant seemingly in renovation. it was noticeably smaller than her old workplace, but harbored a cozy feel, the bustle of the kitchen softly filtering throughout the lobby. she took a copy of her resume out of the small tote bag she was carrying, setting it on the island in front of her. she hears motion, the kitchen doors swinging open and a man clad in a white shirt and blue apron emerges. he approaches her, separated by the counter.

“hey,” he calls, taking her in, slightly, “you, uh, here to apply?”

holy shit, she feels her throat tighten up, studying his face, strong stature, golden brown curls, “hi, yes i am! my name is -,” she introduces, sticking a hand out.

he takes it, momentarily noticing how cold her hands are. 

“carmy,” he returns, “it’s nice to meet you. you, uh, got a resume?” and lets go of her hand. 

she hands it to him, “here,” feeling slightly self conscious as he glances over it, thinking, is this supposed to be my boss? 

“you have a lot of service experience,” he notes, glancing up at her. 

“yeah,” she hesitates, “i’m not sure if that’s what you’re looking for, but i’m a fast learner.”

“no, no, that’s actually what we would need, another front of house,” he responds, “we only have richie right now.”

she feels a light flutter of hope in her chest, encouraged by the reassurance of their lack of competence in the front. 

“are you working now? this last job dates back six months,” he asks, eyes double checking the paper. there was the dreaded question. she was hoping he wouldn’t notice, heat growing in her cheeks a bit. 

“um, yeah…i actually work over at ricky’s,” she admits, hesitantly. his eyes widen a bit, eyebrows raising. 

“i don’t dance, though,” she rushedly clarifies, “i bartend.” 

his eyebrows relax, and a smile creeps at his mouth in realization.

 “yeah, uh, that’s why i didn’t put it on there,” she says, gesturing to the resume he held, “everyone always thinks i’m a dancer.” 

he clears his throat, busying himself with the piece of paper in front of him for a moment before speaking. 

“you a student?” he asks, glancing up to see her nod, bright smile adorning her face. 

“i’m only taking what i can afford right now, which is like two classes, but yeah,” she explains. he doesn’t have reason for why his tongue feels tied, and the back of his neck hot. he shoves it away. 

“well, um, i probably can’t give you more than about 30 hours a week, at least to start. tips are yours to take home but they, uh, probably won’t compare to the tips at ricky’s,” he brings a finger up to his nose, scratching a phantom itch. the girl tilts her head a bit, smiling, “i’ll take that as a challenge,” she quips. a grin breaks his face, not doubting the personable girl. 

“so, uh, when can you start?” he asks. 

“as soon as possible,” she answers, increasingly eager to quit her bartending job. he looks to the side and behind him, towards the kitchen. 

“if you want, i can get you set up today,” he turns back to her, “i think we have some extra aprons in the back.” 

“wait, really?” she reassures, him nodding in response. she lets out a small squeak, clapping her hands, big smile on her face. 

she’s cute, he thinks to himself, watching her enthusiasm, very quickly trying to shake the thought away. don’t be weird, she’s working for you now. off limits. not to mention he knew he wasn’t exactly boyfriend material, emotionally speaking. 

“is this okay to wear?” she asks, gesturing to her outfit and effectively breaking him out of his thoughts. he rakes his eyes downwards over her form, shamefully grateful for the opportunity. hugged by a tight white shirt and baggy jeans that hung to expose a long strip of her lower hips, connecting at her front and lower back. he tears his eyes back up to meet hers. 

“yeah, should be fine,” he says, trying to be as nonchalant as possible, “you won’t be working in the kitchen too much at first, so you don’t have to wear a uniform,” he tells her, putting his hands onto the counter, leaning into them slightly. 

“and just regular work clothes for my next shift?” she asks, finding herself also leaning forward to press her weight against the edge of the counter. he nods, “yeah,” a smirk creeps at the edges of his lips, “just uh, maybe not ricky’s attire,” glancing at the girl. she giggles. he thinks it sounds like bells chiming. 

“what?” she tries to sound surprised, “how am i supposed to make the same tips then?” a smile plays on her lips, meeting his eyes. he lets out a laugh, studying her face. 

“i think you’ll find a way,” he responds. the counter space between the two seemed much smaller than earlier, as now he could see her face in much finer detail. he studies it, briefly, then tears his eyes away, forcing himself to step back. he clears his throat,

“follow me,” and begins walking towards the kitchen, “we’ll try and find you an apron. and introduce you to everyone.” 

a slight feeling of nervousness as she trails behind, unsure what “everyone” will entail.

“okay,” she replies, and steps behind the counter. 

—

 he finds himself in his apartment that night, halfheartedly watching a rerun of an old sitcom on his small tv, his mind wandering back to her time again. he was oddly intrigued by her, wanting to get to know her better. it wasn’t just a physical thing—although she was easy on the eyes— it was her demeanor, sweet and gentle, that somehow immediately smoothed his edges. the staff all took an instant liking to her, welcoming her into the kitchen enthusiastically. sydney seemed happy to have another young woman in the restaurant, tina asking her about her university, richie making the occasional snide comment, but undeniably taking a liking to the new colleague. she made her way around the register system surprisingly fast without training, seamlessly taking orders with the exception of a few brief pauses. carmy kept an eye on the girl throughout the rest of the evening in case she needed him, watching her quickly adapt to the shift of environment. the dinner rush moved shockingly smooth, the large tip jar, empty while richie was manning the front, was halfway full at closing time. he was admittedly impressed with the young woman, trying hard to mentally discern between admiring and enamoring. it was almost as if a bright light had graced the restaurant that evening, leaving carmen with a lingering warm tingle throughout his body. 

he looks around his dark apartment, messy and congested, cigarettes overflowing the ashtray, dishes piling the sink. letting out a deep sigh and running his hand through his curls, he stands, shutting off the tv and making his way to the bedroom. he could clean everything up tomorrow, not that it would make much of a difference, he thinks. although the booming launch of the bear was incredibly uplifting to the chef, reassuring him of the sacrifices he made to keep mikey’s restaurant running, there was still a void carmen felt deep in his heart, growing increasingly apparent in his solitude. he often felt trapped inside of himself, wondering if this was just something he would have to learn to deal with, destined to be defined by his profession, wishing there there was a way he could give into his personal desires while maintaining his professional growth. he crawls into bed and shuts off his lamp light. 

you can’t have your cake and eat it too, a saying he heard from his mom as a kid. he shuts his eyes. 

—                        

fuck. she takes an uneasy breath, staring at herself in the bathroom mirror. turning on the faucet, wetting her palms in cold water and bringing the shaky hands to both sides of her face. 

why am i so nervous? 

she wondered if everyone felt this way before a hookup, focusing on deep breaths to calm her nerves. she wasn’t used to this. she had only ever been intimate within relationships, not having experience with casual encounters, nevertheless ones involving her boss. she knew it was a risky pursuit, especially for being a girl with an easily breakable heart, having shed many tears over lovers prior. nevertheless, something about the pull she felt to carmen was magnetic. he was strong, dominant, confident in his work, yet deeply complicated, a dull sadness within his striking eyes. he seemed the type of person to consistently be bearing the heaviest load on his back, and she had an inexplicable urge to relieve him of this, even if only for a moment. she wanted to watch him in bliss at her own control. just have to make sure it doesn’t go too far, she consistently reminds herself. she studies herself in the mirror, skinny straps of a short white sundress peak out from underneath her hair. a dress she specifically chose for him, adorning her exposed chest with a simple gold necklace. she ultimately was aiming to be comfortable for the night, yet each item was intentionally selected with a certain set of eyes in mind. 

i can do it. i’m going to have fun tonight, she tells herself, and potentially fuck my incredibly hot boss, warming at the thought, then i’m never ever gonna think about him again, she internalizes, having had enough with wasted energy on dead end flings. 

she smoothes out the white dress, satisfied with how it hugs her figure, then exits the small bathroom, making her way into her living room. the clock in the adjacent kitchen reads 11:13, and she makes her way to the large window to watch for carmy’s car. she felt erratic, heart palpitating in her chest at each set of headlights that drove by. she opens the window a few inches, breathing in the warm summer night to try and calm her increasing nervousness. it does work, a bit, and she’s able to even out her breathing before leaving. after a moment, a car slowly drives up to the pavement in front of her apartment and stops, engine idling. her phone vibrates on the counter, and she picks it up. 

carmy: i’m here. 

her heart does a leap in her chest, grabbing her keys and turning off the light before opening her front door and walking outside, locking it behind her. she feels slightly self conscious in the headlights while approaching his car, hearing the click of the passenger’s door being pushed open for her. she grabs the door, pulling it all the way open. 

“hi,” she greets, a bit shy. 

“hey,” he replies warmly, silently taking her image in. she climbs into the car and shuts the door behind her, noticing the clean car’s lack of trash and empty ashtray, differing from the previous night. she meets his eyes, a fluttering in her chest. he looks tired, lids low and white shirt wrinkled, but still has a spark in his eyes, clearly admiring the girl’s presentation. he turns his head back in front of him, breaking the eye contact and putting the car into drive. 

“how was close?” she breaks the silence with, noticing the way his eyes flicker back over to her.  

“long,” he admits, “harder without you there.” 

her heart jumps against her ribs, face growing warm at the slight praise. 

“what? you mean richie isn’t the best front of house closer ever?” she feigns surprise, smiling at the thought.

he lets out a scoff, shaking his head, and she softly giggles at this. the lull of the tires against the road fills her ears, noting the limited cars out at this time. her nerves have significantly calmed from before, but she still feels a knot in her stomach, amplified by the light smell of his cologne within the confined space. 

“are you, uh… are you hungry?” he asks her, eyes trained front. she pauses a moment, debating whether she is hungry or the gnawing feeling in her stomach is from nerves alone. 

“yeah,” she replies, “i am.” she wasn’t going to turn down a personal meal from a world class chef, and the thought of him cooking for her before anything else spreads a warmth throughout her chest. 

“good,” a small smile on his face, “i’ll make us somethin’.”

carmen couldn’t help but feel excitement bloom in his chest at the prospect of spending time alone with the young woman, having spent the day at the restaurant mentally preparing for the night. he had been chopping onions before the dinner rush when she closely brushed behind him in the confined space. he was able to smell her sweet perfume, triggering an image of her to flash across his mind— kneeled, lips parted, face flushed, chest bare, leaning into his hands— the knife slipped and he sliced the side of his finger, cursing an obscenity as soon as it happened. he dropped the knife on the cutting board, walking over to the sink, mentally cursing himself for allowing the to perverse thoughts to bleed over into his work, as he promised himself many times they wouldn’t. the bleeding of his finger had stopped quickly under the cool stream of water to reveal a small nick. he was able to put a bandaid on it and get directly back to work, but it plagued him a bit. he wondered if would he be able to maintain the professional kitchen environment in the long run, once the two were satisfied with the fun they’d had. it had proved difficult so far, thoughts of her swarming his head uncontrollably since she had stepped foot into his restaurant. 

the car slows, pulling up to the curb outside carmen’s apartment complex. he pushes the gear shift into park, turning off the engine. 

“this is you?” she asks, to which he nods. “you live closer than i thought you did,” she chimes, opening the door to step out of the car. she smooths the white dress, glancing around the complex. he comes up behind the girl, pressing a hand to the small of her back. 

“this way,” he says, ushering her forward. she can’t help but focus on the warmth of his hand, large and encompassing against her thinly clothed skin. they enter the building, taking the long flight of stairs up to his home, carmy desperately trying to look anywhere else besides the length of her legs leading up to the soft skin of her ass, fully visible as she climbs in front of him. they speedily make it to the top, carmen rustling in his front pocket for the keys. he swings the door open to a dark room, stepping in and flicking on a lamp switch. she follows him in, eyes scanning her surroundings. it was clean and tidy, with piles of various cook books stacked on side tables and a knitted green blanket draped over the old couch. the place smelled like him, and she feels her muscles relax. 

“i know it’s not much, but uh,” he shuts the door, “make yourself at home, please.”

she gives him a big smile, “it’s cute. just what i imagined,” and puts her belongings on a side table, walking around to examine the space. he feels the edges of his lips twitch at her response, watching her look at the scarcity of the place. she spins around, facing him, “you’re really clean, too.” she sounds impressed. 

he smiles at this, appreciating the assumption. 

“it’s not always like this,” he responds truthfully. she lets out a soft laugh and saunters over towards the kitchen island, pushing herself up to sit on the stool he had. he walks to the opposite side of the counter, opening the fridge to gather various ingredients for their dinner. 

“what are you gonna make?” she curiously asks. 

“just uh,” he pauses, looking for an item, “something quick.” he straightens, carrying the ingredients to the counter. he meets her eyes, the two separated by a few feet of laminate, and he feels his chest constrict under her gaze. “some roasted chicken and veggies, with a garlic herb butter,” he turns back to the fridge, grabbing a bottle of unopened wine, beginning to look for a corkscrew. 

“fuck,” she breathes out, “that sounds so good.” 

carmy tenses, stilling for a moment. he loved the way her voice sounded, wanted to hear more. it was apparent he was tightly strung from the grueling week, feeling reactive to everything she said. he pulls the corkscrew out from a drawer, opening the fresh bottle and grabbing two glasses. 

“you want some?” he asks her, holding it up. 

she nods, “yes, please,” eager for a bit of liquid encouragement. he fills the two glasses halfway, handing her one and bringing the side of his glass to clink against hers.

“cheers for making it through the week,” he toasts, earning a giggle from her. 

“cheers! and,” she continues, tilting her head, “cheers for richie not seeing my tits when i was in your office,” she grins and takes a slow sip of the wine, maintaining their eye contact. he lets out a breathy laugh, raising his wine glass to his lips, “yeah, i’ll cheers to that,” and drinks, the red wine dry on his lips. 

with both of their plates empty and the girl’s warm praise still lingering in the room, carmen drinks the remaining wine from his third glass, feeling calm and airy. the apartment is hot and fragrant from the cooking, and the young man notices a pinch of want in the back of his mind, wondering where he had put his cigarettes. 

“do you mind if i go smoke?” he asks her, wine weighing on his tongue. she smiles a bit, shaking her head.

“i’ll go with you,” her voice a bit lower and more drawn out than he would regularly hear it. he nods, standing and walking towards the bedroom to look for a pack of cigarettes. 

“i don’t have a balcony,” he calls from his room, opening his nightstand drawer, “but we can step out onto the fire escape for a bit,” he grabs his carton out of the dresser. carmy walks back into the room to find the girl standing, peering out his window at the black grated fire escape structure. he leans beside her to unlock the window, pushing it open. he puts one leg through, ducks, then steps out, offering a hand for the girl. she takes it, hand small in his, and repeats his actions, noticing a definitive impairment as she joins him outside. 

the night was warm and humid, chicago air damp with the summer monsoon. it smelled good outside, though, air fresh with recent rain, a mellow hum of cicada sounding throughout the trees. carmy flips the carton open, placing a filter between his lips and illuminating his face with the orange of the lighter’s flame. she runs her eyes over his features while they’re briefly lit up, finding herself in a close proximity to him, the two leaning up against the iron railing. she brushes her hair back behind her shoulders, watching the man smoke. the few glasses of wine she had clouded her previous anxieties. she genuinely couldn’t remember what she was worried about now, thoroughly enjoying the sight of the man in front of her. she leans into him, pressing the side of her hip into his thigh, arm flush against his. 

“can i have some?” she asks, staring up at him, glancing down at the cigarette. she didn’t know exactly what it was, the alcohol or him looking so attractive with a cancer stick in his mouth, but she felt compelled to give it another try, having a distaste from previous experience. he turns to face her, gazes locking, a glint of surprise behind his eyes. 

“sure,” he answers, remaining still, pointer and middle finger loosely grasping the cigarette. he glances at her expectantly and she leans over, bringing her mouth to the filter, lips brushing the tips of his fingers. she sucks, carmen watching, completely entranced, then stands upright again, exhaling the smoke with a slight furrow in her brow. the man lets a slight smirk break his face, bringing the cigarette back up to his mouth and inhaling. he studies the dark street behind his building, sporadically illuminated by the soft glow of a street lamp, tiredness catching up with him. she keeps her eyes trained on the man, trailing from his face down his body. she stops at his arms, admiring the sheer strength of them, tracing her sights over his various tattoos. she almost felt overtaken by want in that moment, darting her eyes back up to his lips wrapped around the cigarette. the young woman leans into him further, more of her body touching his and now facing him directly, tipsiness slightly clouding her rationality. 

“carm,” she breathes out, immediately catching his attention. he gazes down at her, cognisant of her breasts pushed against his side, studying her face to find desire written across her features. she brings a hand to his chest, leaning up and gently kissing his neck. she feels his sharp intake of breath under her body, and she smirks at this, placing a few more gentle kisses around the side of his neck. the two had a strict rule about kissing on the lips, but never made the clear distinction to forbid all types of kissing, carmy not daring to protest. his eyes fall closed, focused on the heat of her lips against his neck, the weight of her body on his. he throws the cigarette to the ground, wrapping an arm around her, sliding his fingers up her back and to the base of her skull, carding his fingers through her hair. she nips his neck suddenly, causing him to instinctively tighten his grip, pulling the hair, emanating a breathy moan from the girl. his mouth falls open, a smirk playing on the edges of his lips. wrapping his other arm around her back, hand grabbing her hip, he pulls their bodies closer together. carmen’s tight grip doesn’t falter, pulling her head back to see her face, her eyes trailing upwards to meet his. she studies his blown pupils, him drinking her in as if she were a desert oasis. her face is flushed, lids heavy, eyes locked onto his. he leans in and pulls her simultaneously, lightly putting his forehead against hers, noses touching, lips twitching. she can smell the smoke on his breath combined with his fresh deodorant. she finds herself completely intoxicated by this, tightly shutting her eyes, unsure of what she’ll do if she continues to stare. she feels his breath, warm on her lips, so desperate for contact. 

“you like this, don’t you?” he asks, voice a low rumble. 

she gently nods, nose brushing against his, not trusting her voice. a slight tug makes her softly gasp, eyes snapping open. he pulls away, but only slightly. “answer me,” the sound of his voice weakening her knees. he scans his eyes over her face.

“yes,” she breathes out, sounding far more sultry than she intended, “i really like it, carm,” she admits, tone needy. he pulls away from her completely, the girl missing the warmth from his face almost instantly. 

“get inside,” he growls, releasing her hair and removing his arm, leaning over and shoving the window open. 

she takes a second to collect herself, almost dizzy from the eye contact and the growing heat under her dress. she puts her hand on the window ledge, climbing back into the apartment as quickly as she could. carmy follows behind, shutting the window halfway. he eyes the girl, standing by the edge of the counter, then walks past her to the couch, sitting in the middle, leaning back. she shifts, unsure of what to do, her hazed courage of earlier fading. 

“c’mere,” he gestures her over. 

she slowly walks towards him, coming to stand in front of him in between his seated legs, front of her shins bumping into the sofa. he leans forward, bringing his strong hands to caress the back of her thighs, admiring the silkiness of her skin, trailing his palms up and towards the curve of her ass, softly kneading the skin, then stopping. 

“take this off,” he commands, squeezing. her face reddens, inching her hands down to the hem of her dress, slowly pulling it up her thighs. she pauses, before flipping the edge up over her head, taking the dress off completely. he softly groans at the sight, fabric removed to reveal her bare body, clothed only by a pair of skinny black panties. she drops it on the floor, shyly bringing her arms up to cover her breasts. he leans closer to her, pressing a kiss to her navel, bringing his hands up to grab her hips. he marvels at her exposed skin, feeling close to primal with desire, tempted to pull her onto his lap and shove the panties to the side. 

should i?

he glances upwards at her, a smile creeping at the edges of his lips. he slides his left hand down to her the back of her lower thigh, then quickly pulls her body towards him, the girl letting out a sound of surprise, straddling his lap. he pushes her knees open more, hand trailing towards her inner thigh, stroking the soft skin, moving closer to kiss her neck. she lets out a quiet, “yes,” as she leans into the man’s touch, hoping for some release. his fingers brush against the fabric of her clothed mound, making her buck her hips forward a bit. 

“want me to touch you?” he asks her, voice low in tone. she quickly nods her head, biting down on her lip to prevent any escaping noise. he brings his pointer finger to her clothed slit, dragging it up and down over the sensitive area a few times, noticing the abundant slickness beneath the fabric. her eyes flutter closed, cherishing the delicate contact, craving far more. carmen watches her closely, pulling his hand away. her brow furrows, to which he smiles. bringing his left hand from her thigh, he grabs the black panties and pulls them to the side, exposing her glistening core. he groans at the sight, the girls face flushing, bringing his thumb to rest on her swollen clit, unmoving. she whimpers at the sensitivity, bucking her hips forward once more, to which he tightens his grip on her thigh in response. he starts rubbing small, torturous circles with his thumb, thoroughly enjoying the reaction of her body, heat eminating from between her legs, juices dripping down the insides of her thighs and down onto his pants. 

“you’re fuckin’ soaked,” he tells her, cock straining against his pants. she’s too embarrassed to respond, closing her eyes and throwing her arms over carmen’s shoulders, resting her face in the crevice of his neck as he continues his circles at a faster pace, dipping his middle finger down to rest against her opening. she kisses his neck, needy for more and tired of waiting, giving a thrust of her hips to sink herself onto his finger. she releases a drawn out moan, clenching around the soaked digit. 

“fuck,” he curses. 

a sharp smack lands on her thigh, the girl softly whimpering in response, coming back up to meet carmen’s eyes. he has a stern look on his face, a glint of enjoyment present.

“you want me inside of you that bad?” he questions, beginning a soft curling motion with his finger, loving the way she begins to fall apart. 

“yesss,” she pleads, breathing heavily, trying to get closer to him, her hand coming up to the base of his neck to anchor herself. he increases the pace, bringing his thumb back to circle the bundle of nerves. feeling her relax at the pleasure, he pushes a second finger into her, marveling at the hot constriction of her walls. his pulses become rhythmic, middle and ring finger fucking into her, a wet squelching sound beginning to fill the room. her panting moans uncontrollably increase in crescendo, quickly clamping her teeth down to bite her lip, not wanting to give him the satisfaction of watching her come undone. he studies her face, closely— eyes screwed shut and head thrown back, trying to seem less affected by his fingers than she obviously is. 

his eyes trail down to her bare chest, nipples perked. 

jesus christ

carmy slows the pace of his fingers, thrusting them deeper now. he shifts, bringing his lips to brush against her right breast, trailing upwards to her nipple, gently sucking the bud into his mouth. 

her teeth release from her lips, letting out a whimper from the pleasure. 

he smirks a little, motivated from the noise, taking his fingers almost completely out and easing them back in entirely. his thumb continues its feather like circles around her clit, carmy teasing a gentle bite to her nipple. obscene sounds plentifully spill from her mouth, leaning forward into him as he comes up from her breast. her eyes open and lock with his,

“oh my god, yes,” she cries, breath increasingly heavy, his slow fingers bringing her to the edge. a smile pulls at the corners of her mouth as he continues the same movements, watching her approach her climax, eyes shutting tightly, head leaning back. 

“please don’t stop,” her words come rushed, “i’m-“ 

he withdraws his fingers from inside of her, removing his hand from her warmth completely. she lifts her head immediately and looks to the man, confusion and frustration apparent on her face. he lets his smirk grow. 

“what?” he asks, watching her brows furrow further, “did you think i was gonna let you cum?” he asks as he grips her thighs. 

“you’re cruel,” she whines, head falling against his shoulder. 

“yeah?” the smirk on his face was prevalent in his tone. she shifts the placement of her head and comes to gently kiss the bottom of his neck, the hand resting on his chest slowly inching down his stomach and caressing the skin that meets the edge of his pants.

“yeah,” she responds. another kiss to his neck, this one higher up. she sits up slightly to move her hands lower, unbuttoning his pants and pulling the zipper down. she goes to greedily pull the waist band of his underwear, and he stops her, grabbing her wrist. 

“get down on your knees,” he commands, voice rough. she feels a surge of excitement run through her, easing herself to the ground between his legs, eager to inflict on him the pleasure she endured moments earlier, a dull ache residing in her core. she helps him pull his jeans down around his ankles, him kicking them off completely. she runs her hands over the tops of his strong thighs, then bringing her lips to trail kisses from his lower to upper thigh, teasing closer and closer to his clothed bulge, straining against the fabric. he sits up, slightly, pulling his shirt off over his head. she could swear her mouth watered at the sight, shamelessly gawking at his broad muscles completely exposed, along with tattoos she’s never had the pleasure of seeing. she rubs the palm of her hand over the solid bulge, inching towards the waistband of his briefs. in a fluid motion she quickly peels them towards her, carmy’s cock springing from the confinement and slapping against his stomach. she can’t help but let out a soft moan at the sight, bringing a hand up to grasp the base of his cock, thick and heavy in her hand. the young woman marvels, a bit. 

“it’s big,” she observes, glancing up at him, then back down. she slowly jerks her hand up and down a few times, nervously eyeing the length. she leans forward, placing a hand on his thigh, and licking a long stripe up the side of his cock, then softly kisses the tip, brushing the head against her plumped lips. she looks up at the man’s face, jaw clenched and eyes completely fixated on her. she flattens her tongue and licks the head of his penis, swirling it around the tip. when she locks eyes with him and grins at him, tongue on his cock, he nearly explodes, throwing his head back against the couch and groaning. she presses her bare breasts against his thighs, now engulfing his length in her mouth, slowly moving up and down, hand wrapping around to stroke what she can’t fit. he grunts, bringing his hand up to his mouth, biting his knuckles for composure. she falls into a pace, saliva coating his cock, dripping onto his stomach. she forces her mouth down deeper onto him, gagging, tears brimming her eyes. 

“fuck!” he exclaims, jolting forward. he grabs her hair, gathering it with his hands to keep it out of the way, using every ounce of resistance he has to keep from pushing her head down further onto him. she sinks her mouth lower, bobbing her head and quickening her pace. he tightens his grip on her hair and says her name. she looks up in inquiry, releasing him from her mouth with a wet pop. she continues to stroke his length, meeting his eyes. 

“stand up,” he tells the girl, her immediately complying and getting up, wiping the spit away from her mouth. he comes to lean forward, eye level with her stomach, hooking his fingers into the sides of her panties and removing them altogether. he looks up to her. 

“go get on the bed,” watching her quickly nod and turn towards his bedroom, standing and following the girl, both of them stark in their nudity. his eyes fall to her round ass, bringing a hand up to give it a small smack. she lets out a little yelp in surprise, turning over her shoulder to find a grin on his face. upon entering the dark room, carmy walks to the end of the bed, switching on a lamp on his dresser. the girl crawls onto the bed, flipping to lay on her back, resting her head on his pillow. she watches him from across the room, raising a knee to stack and bringing her hand up to her chest. she runs her thumb over her perked nipple, tracing her free hand down her navel to the crease of her thigh, staring at the man. he turns to her, raking his eyes over her laying form. her hand shifts lower, fingers brushing over her slickened clit, letting out a soft gasp. she arches her back slightly, rubbing small, soft circles over her sensitivity, locking eyes with the man. 

jesus fuck, he internalizes, praying to god this image would remain forever burned into his brain, cock twitching. 

there was something about the man that completely diminished her inhibitions, allowing her to fully submit to her desires and finding her brain instantly numb at his control. she tweaks her nipple, letting out a moan, face flushing, lips parting to speak. 

“come fuck me already, carmy,” she breathes out, movements faltering. he immediately reacts, getting onto the bed, hands hooking under her thighs and pulling her lower body flush to his, his cock laying over her pelvis.

“can’t wait anymore?” he asks lowly, fully knowing his own desire is immeasurable, desperate to be inside of her. 

“no,” she whines, bucking her hips and unintentionally spreading her slickness over the bottom of his length. he lets out a strained breath, running his thumb over her hipbones, grip tightening. he pulls back, then slowly thrusts forward to glide through her folds, feeling her grow increasingly wet. he moves back slightly, now gripping his cock and giving it a stroke, pressing it against her opening. he shifts his hips, slowly inserting the head. he looks to her, meeting her eyes. 

“this ok?” he asks, scanning her face, watching her nod enthusiastically. 

“put it in, please,” she pleads. 

he pushes his hips forward, sinking inside of her inch by inch. the two watch the sight, entranced, a harmonious moan ripping through the both of them. buried to the hilt, carmy pauses, coming forward to lean over her— resting his right forearm by her head, his left arm wrapping around her leg and hoisting it up over his lower back. she wraps her arms around the back of his neck, pulling him in further. his thrusts start slow and shallow, face buried in her neck, almost in disbelief of the pleasure, so much better than those dreams. he bottoms out, hearing her gasp. 

“you feel,” she breathes out, “so good,” her eyes screwing shut. he thrusts, again, slowly, moving his hand to grip her ass. 

“fuck, baby” he groans into her neck, hips working at a delicate pace. she clenches involuntarily at the name, eager for more, urging him closer with her leg. he recognizes the cue, bringing his leg in closer, pulling out almost completely then plunging back into her. she pants, bringing a shaky hand up to grab his sturdy bicep for stability, feeling his strong muscles ripple underneath her grip. he bites down on his bottom lip, face and chest flushed as he pulls his cock back out of her tightness, thoroughly enjoying the view. he snaps his hips forward, the girl crying out, squeezing his arm tightly. carmen settles into a heightened pace, the depth of his cock igniting a fire within the girl. she moves a hand down and circles her sensitive clit with two fingers, feeling her orgasm already rapidly building as he lifts her lower back slightly off the mattress, driving into her harder. breaths grow heavy, the room gets hotter, skin slaps against skin. he brings his hand up to the side of her face, coming to hover above her, locking eyes. her whole face is flush, baby hairs sticking up, a wild lust in her gaze. carmy snaps his hips harder. 

“you’re so fuckin’ pretty,” he tells her in pace with his thrusts, the girl letting out a moan in response, ripping her hand away from her clit as to not fall over the peak. everything is almost too much as the man relentlessly fucks her, savoring every sound, feeling, sight, not knowing if this would ever happen again. her climax approaches closer with each strong thrust of his hips, and she feels compelled to ask permission. 

“carmy,” she whimpers, “can i please cum?”

he groans, moving his hand to rest on her throat. 

“hold on baby, almost,” he grits through his clenched jaw, driving his cock deeply into her, slick juices spreading everywhere. she brings her hand to the back of his neck, grabbing his curly brown locks and tugging. he lets out a sharp breath at the action, hammering his hips against her, hoisting her leg a bit higher. his thrusts stutter, feeling himself grow impossibly closer to the edge. her moans become a chorus of “please, please, please,” desperate to cum around his cock. he grins slightly at her anticipation, lightly putting pressure against her throat. 

“you gonna cum for me?” he growls, feeling himself approaching his own orgasm. she nods, tears brimming her eyes, face contorted in pleasure. his simple words snap the final string holding her together, and she comes undone with a loud cry, digging her nails into his back. the pleasure feels white hot throughout her body, waves of euphoria overtaking her. her body shivers, the clenching of her heat around carmen is enough to push him over his edge as he lets out a strangled moan, hot cum shooting into her, cock pulsing against her walls. they both lay there still, riding out the aftershocks together, bodies flush. they both catch their breaths for a moment, basking in the warmth of each other. carmy pushes himself up onto his forearm, grabbing her face with a strong hand and planting a kiss on her cheek, then one on her forehead. she tries to ignore the butterflies that erupt inside of her. he reaches over to the nightstand, grabbing a few tissues, then slowly pulls out of her, his cum spilling down the curve of her ass. he gently cleans her up with the tissue, walking to the bathroom to throw them away once she’s dry. he returns to his room to see her sprawled onto her side, laying over his pillows. he joins in, laying next to her, scooting his strong arm under her head. she scoots closer to him, hand on his chest. he’s warm, smells good, feels safe, and she finds her eyes close for a moment. 

“i’ll leave in just a sec,” she tells him softly, “i’m just so comfy.”

he wraps his other arm around her, kissing her forehead once more. 

“stay the night,” he suggests, knowing it’s for a selfish reason, currently unable to fathom sleeping in a cold and empty bed without her presence. she happily hums in response, snuggling closer, already feeling herself drifting off. he closely watches the girl laying in his arms, eyes flickering over her face. he admires her features up close, examining what he’s usually too far away to see, running his eyes over a few faded freckles, the light peach fuzz on her cheek, the glimmer of a golden nose ring. he feels a twinge in his chest, resting his forehead against the sleeping girl’s, her deep breathing melodic to his tired ears. carmy knew deep down he wouldn’t be able to entertain this forever, opting to cherish the feeling of her against him while it lasts. he reaches to the foot of the bed, pulling a throw blanket up over the two of them, not bothering to shut off the lamp. he feels a sweet relief once he pulls her into him once more, nuzzling his nose into her hair. he shuts his eyes, the events from the day catching up to him. 

he finds the last thing he thinks about before drifting into sleep is her, sweet and airy, breathing in her scent closely. he hears a dreamlike giggle, reminiscent of bells chiming, and smiles softly. 

— 

i hope you enjoyed! writing for these two gives me the butterflies fr

chapter 3 hopefully in the works! <33 if you enjoy please let me know :)

part 3 - human, for a minute

[spottedgardeneelstan]

shen qingqiu’s narration in svsss is generally regarded as very unreliable. but how unreliable truly is he? how many times in the novels does he either intentionally mislead both himself and the reader? how many times does he mislead us by being dumb as hell and just getting it wrong? when one is plagued by questions such as these, there is only one course of action!!!!!!

i went to the store and bought physical copies of vol1-4, a highlighter, and a blank book jacket. my next few weeks at work will be spent 1/4 doing my job, and 3/4 doing my more IMPORTANT job- ACADEMIC(?) RESEARCH AND ANALYSIS!!!!!!!!!!!

i’ll compile them into a comprehensive list once i’m done reading and post it on here! when it’s posted, if you notice missing sqq lie, please let me know so i can update the list!

[crystallizsch]

HI SO I JUST WANT TO SHARE THIS LITTLE PURCHASE I GOT FROM @letterstoear's SHOP!!

it's the scarabia duo as small bear plushies and I'M‼️‼️‼️ SO IN LOVE WITH THEM 🥺💖💕

i've been eyeing these for months and i finally was able to get them 😭💕 and they even arrived earlier than i expected!!

i love how these little guys look!! the simplicity of the details makes them so so adorable (like jamil's hair and tie and kalim's head scarf tied into a ribbon and both of them having bows) and i just love their little faces too 🥺

they're also oh so soft and squishy, and they feel like they were made with a lot of care and love <333

and them being pocket-sized means that i’ll be able to take them anywhere >:3

ALSO NOT ONLY THAT. I GOT AN UNEXPECTED LETTER AS AN EXTRA I WAS JJABXJSJSJ SCREAMING.

it was a cute letter from jamil sharing his thoughts and feelings with you after a magic carpet ride <333 (intended to be platonic!! but i rock with that just as much) and it's SO SO fluffy and cute, i was literally giggling kicking my feet from all of it.

and i found out after that the letter that i read was already up and posted here for a while, so anyone can go check it out!! fellow jamil enthusiasts, share in my joy reading this PLEASE (i'll still reblog it later though so i can gush about it more myself)

also also there's just something about getting the letter unexpectedly, and then reading it for the first time as a physical copy makes it somehow feel more fun and special 💖

anyways, this absolutely made my week. probably even the rest of my month. THANK YOU FOR SUCH LOVELY WORK 🥹🫶

(also, live yuu reaction:)

PLEASE CHECK OUT THEIR SHOP >> HERE << THEY HAVE OTHER DORMS' BEAR PLUSHIES AVAILABLE AND THEY ALSO DO CUSTOM CHARACTER PLUSHIES AND MORE!!

[kithtaehyung]

[ 231214 ] hey, loves. thought about this a lot over the past couple months or so, but this week really sealed my decision (nothing scary, but work just got immensely overwhelming in a short amount of time):

after 3tan12 and these holiday fics—whenever they are posted—i’m gonna take time to recharge.

could be a month, could be more. but i definitely wanna focus on studio stuff, shop things, and getting some actual rest in general.

what do 2024 plans look like?

resting/shop work/working on organizing the physical copies of 3tan!

uploading 3tan in parts to wattpad. started the process on friday and will be posting parts 1-3 times a week until it’s caught up👍

3tan, 7days, mami, and hush yeah should all be regulars on the ryen show :)) afyt, and lie should also be posted within the year, so we will finally have real jimin fics on the mlist🤍 + the relief requests.

it’s possible 3tan will wrap up. though i won’t actively think about it bc it already makes me want to curl into a ball and cry, i think the series could have a natural close by the end of 2024 or early half of 2025🍊

still making content for y’all, both written and otherwise. after three years, i just finally feel some burnout and would like some time to myself for a bit while dealing with some life changes.

think that’s it for now. of course i’ll be here to talk to y’all—and we have the discord!—so you’ll still see me around. but if there’s less activity lately, this is most likely why🧡

thank you to everyone that has been here, whether you just got here or if you’ve been around for quite some time. it’s been so fun making bangtan content, and this community has become part of my everyday life. but rest is finally needed. so let’s have some holiday fun and then i will be sitting back and hopefully doing nothing🤣

[keysorsomething]

Unprofessional

1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 6 | 7 Hey! Here's part five! Sorry it took so long, I was busy and got sidetracked with another project.

Cross-posted on Ao3

You felt like you were going to puke, listening to the pen scrape on the paper as König wrote you up. You and Nikto had been interviewed, and though you insisted nothing “bad” had happened, you were still being written up. Like you were too rowdy on the school bus.

You could swear you feel the stinging of tears meeting your eyes, but that’s stupid. You’re a soldier. You kill people. You don’t cry because of a piece of paper. Still, your hands shake and your eyes sting and you just want to reach out to Nikto, but he isn’t there.

You were both interviewed separately, both written up separately, and you’d likely be going on missions separately from now on. And you hated it. You just hoped he did too. He had to - with the way that he laid on your chest and hummed as you slept in his bed. In the way that he looked at you, the way that he leaned into your touch. He had to hate it, just as much as you. If not more.

“You will not interact with him in such ways again,” König looks up at you, putting the paper into the copy machine by his desk. It beeps slowly as it scans the writing, and each beep hits your ears like a chisel to your skull. It pounds against your head, almost being physically painful.

Beep, beep, beep!

And then that awful crunching noise of the paper printing. It feels like scraping metal against your mind, just like the metal of knives scrapping against the skin on the battlefield.

…Maybe you shouldn’t think about that while looking at your boss.

He huffs, pulling out the freshly printed copy of the paper and holding it out to you, “You are… a good asset,” He starts, eyes flitting under his mask. “Do not make me fire you. It would be… unbeneficial. Harmful, even. To the team.”

You look miserably at the paper in his hands, biting the inside of your cheek. You nod, taking the paper from him.

“Thank you, sir,” You mumble, looking down at the stark white paper that’s now in your hands. His writing is thick and bold in an eye-burning black ink against the almost luminescence of the paper. This is the weirdest shade of white you’ve ever seen, and it’s almost memorizing. It would be if you weren’t absolutely destroyed emotionally. You all but sniffle. “I’ll… see you tomorrow, sir,” You mumble, rushing out of the room before he can respond.

This is so stupid. It makes no sense for you to cry. It makes no sense for you to be so upset. It’s not like you’ve been in a deeply romantic relationship with him for years. You were fucking around for like, two weeks. There is no reason for a trained killer like you to be acting like a schoolchild whose dad told them he didn’t like their partner.

You rush through the halls, power walking to avoid anyone seeing you like this. That’s something you don’t need any more of. You mean, the last time someone saw you, you’re entire life was ruined.

Oh, God, you sound like an absolutely smitten teenager. That’s so embarrassing.

Your emotions are fluctuating so much right now. Sadness, embarrassment, anger, embarrassment. Now you were curious. Who told? Did they let it slip on accident or was it malicious? Did he just figure it out on his own? Maybe he was trying to talk to Nikto about something else and you were just there. Wrong place wrong time, y’know?

You get to your room. Your own room, not Nikto’s, not that stupid little fantasy cabin you could have with him. Your room. Your empty, cold room with no one to cuddle up to.

You should retire. Out of spite. You should draft a statement and march right back up there and slam it down on that Austrian fuck’s desk. Or maybe not retire, but quit and find an opposing company so maybe one day you could-

Okay, too far. You don’t have to get violent. Oh, fuck, violent.

Nikto was probably off his rocker.

You have to stop him. But you can’t see him, that wouldn’t be a good look, would it? You huff, looking around. Who the hell can you trust? Both not to talk, but also with Nikto. He was very particular about who he liked. You rack your brain for a moment, going over everyone you could.

And that is how you end up outside of the door of the one man you can trust in this situation. The ever-silent, ever-familiar to Nikto….

Velikan.

You start scrambling for an explanation, cringing at how badly you were stammering for the words. He crosses his arms, leaning against the door frame impatiently. Your words take a moment for you to find, but you find them.

“I’m in trouble for fraternizing with Nikto and you’re the only one who I know that I can trust who Nikto’s familiar with - I mean, actually he worked with Mace, right? And Mace is a nice guy, I’m sure Nikto and he get along fine - but I just,” Your hands find your face. “Can you make sure Nikto’s okay? I just… don’t want him to try and beat the fuck out of König, that’d be the worst thing-”

Velikan’s hand meets your shoulder, gently shaking you to make sure you look up at his covered eyes. He lets out a low, growling sound, reassuring you. You’re really not sure why exactly you went to him now that you’re thinking about it. You have no clue what’s wrong with him, but you’ve never heard him speak. He just…. makes weird growling laughs. You aren’t sure if that’s all he can do, or if it’s just some dumb prank he’s playing on everyone else.

It doesn’t matter, you’re already grabbing for him to pull him in for a hug. He nods, making some more low grunting sounds. Oh, maybe it’s the mask?

“I’m sorry,” You mumble into the stiff material of his suit. He shakes his head.

“No, no,” The grunts sound like words now, “It’s okay,” he shushes you. He pats your shoulder, before pushing you off him. He uses one hand to hold your shoulder and the other to pull his goggles up.

His face is smudged with eye-black, but the signal is there. He’s trying to get you to see his sincerity. You nod, taking a deep breath. You are not going to cry. You aren’t crying.

He lets out a new grunt, patting his chest, the grunt sounds something like “Nikto.” You look into his eyes, breathing shuttering.

“You’ll look after Nikto?” You ask, and he nods. Then, he shakes his head, patting your shoulder. “And you won’t let him fight the colonel?” You ask. He nods one more. You back away, but before you can leave, he stops you.

He thwaps you on the shoulder, “You find support, too,” He grumbles out. Yup, it’s the mask making it hard to understand him. You nod again, and he gives you a thumbs up.

He then steps out of his room, once more patting your shoulder as he walks off. Possible to find Nikto.

Oh, you hope it’s to find Nikto.

You hope Nikto is going to be okay.

You hope you’re going to be okay.

[leejenowrld]

a question to all the mfal characters who aren’t yn and jeno

have you ever witnessed them doing something cute and romantic and thought “damn they’re kinda adorable” ??

wait this question is so cute 🥹🥹

warning - BIG SMUT, threesome implication

donghyuck - once i walked into them and i was gonna leave but i can’t lie, i secretly stood the side and just watched, shit was so hot. i was so turned on

yn - [hits donghyuck] what the fuck?

donghyuck - it was so hot. you can’t blame me. it was like i was watching some irl sexy promo. jeno kept slamming his cock in and out of her, like every minute. i got hard cos i just saw the wetness leaving yn’s pussy and slicking up every time jeno pulled out, only for him to slam in again, and all of these juices and milky strings would attach to his juicy juicy cock and then he’d fuck it all into yn again. the sounds of yn’s wet pussy… jesus. he’d do it through their orgasms as well. i left after 5 minutes but i heard it for hours, these dirty cute animals were doing this all night long. i remember thinking “shit, they’re cute, i respect them.” yn kept screaming daddy and jeno kept slapping her ass and boobs, it was genuinely the best sight i’ve ever seen. i dream of it. yn kept begging jeno to cum in her and me and jeno were both a bit confused cus ??? what else has he been doing the entire night

yn - [shocked, jeno holding her back as she’s ready to throw hands and kill donghyuck] you just stood there and watched us?? fucking perv

jeno - [unfazed and turned on] i remember that hyuck, i fucked her so dumb she kept asking me to cum in her although that was what i had been doing for hours. once my girls hit her 4th orgasm of the session, she starts chatting shit

donghyuck - shits so hot

jeno - next time we do that you can join [winks at donghyuck and blows him a kiss, hisses when yn flicks her finger against his forehead with force.]

donghyuck - [facing yn, licking his lips and palming his bulge] u know me and jeno have kissed before, right?

yn - don’t pull this shit with me now, jeno’s kissed half the people on campus, i know. don’t fucking remind me.

jeno - baby, it’s more like 3/4 of campus

yn - that’s it, no sex for three weeks.

jeno - [smirks playfully] i’ll just fuck donghyuck

yn - [copies jeno’s smirk] i’ll just kill you

jaemin - yeah, i won’t ever tell them but they’re pretty cute and melt my heart

jeno - please, you tell me that all the time

jaemin - anyways, when yn and jeno graduated they both got a lot of opportunities to do internships abroad which means they have to be apart for a few weeks. they’re both so smart and care about their future so ofc they won’t pass up on the opportunities. it’s quite sad but equally heart warming when i see them say their goodbyes. they’ll hug each other at the airport for so long and it’s just sweet seeing jeno comfort her because yn gets really emotional but somehow jeno can help control it? i think it’s a superpower, i’ll hear or see yn crying her eyes out and then jeno comes up to her and hugs her and holds her and they share a few kisses, jeno whispers some sweet shit to her, he just is an overall comfort to her and it only takes a few mins for her to go back to normal.

heejin - once jeno brought me and yn tickets to some play we had been geeking out about. at first jeno wasn’t gonna come because he probably just wanted to give me and yn friendship time but yn didn’t really read the room and begged him to come 😭😭 i mean tbf i told him to come to because he’s also a fan of this play. he didn’t listen to me but yn gave him puppy dog eyes and smiled and worked her magic so he just had to say yes lmao. i’m used to third wheeling them lmao but they were pretty cute that night, they didn’t make me feel sick. it’s the little things they do, the eye contact, yn truly looks up at him and she’s the physical description of this emoji ‘🥹’ you can literally see their pupils dilate when they look at each other. you can feel the love in the atmosphere. it makes me believe that love actually is all around.

[kickflippinginurheart]

I need help

I hate needing to make this post but the government is screwing me the fuck over, what’s new. This is a long story so scroll to the bottom if you just want the cliff notes.

I transferred from one college to another in the hopes of being safer, I was being targeted for my queerness and for not being white. So I moved to a new school that was much more accepting and (thankfully) cheaper to attend. I was supposed to get some money from Fafsa as a return which I would use for rent, as I live off campus. With rent taken care of I was planning on getting a job to take care of my groceries and anything else I wanted to do.

However, I never got my return. So I started making calls. My school told me they actually never got my Fafsa in, and I owe them money for this semester. So I start making calls to Fafsa asking what’s going on. They tell me why the issue was, that I need to make certain corrections, everything like that. I try my best to do so, but I start getting an error on my form. It won’t let me go past a certain section because a false error, so I can’t actually send in my corrections electronically. They’re unsure why I’m receiving this error and can do nothing to fix it.

The only option is to send me a paper copy of my form and have me fill it out and mail it back to them. It will take:

- 10-14 business days for me to receive the forms

- 2-3 weeks for them to receive and process it

- 2-3 business days for my school to receive and process it

And

- 3-5 days for me to receive my return

I need this money for rent, for cat food, and testosterone. By the time this money actually comes in I’ll be two months behind rent and at risk of being homeless, not to mention starving. My family gives me no financial support because of the fact I’m trans. I pay for my own testosterone, my own college and my own food.

I’ve been having a lot of trouble finding jobs because I’m also physically disabled. I walk with a cane and have days where my leg gives out and I can’t walk at all. Finding a place to work under these circumstances hasn’t been easy and still, two months after moving here, I haven’t been able to get one. I draw and can do commissions if anyone is interested, I’d just really appreciate any help I can get.

Thank you for reading this far

TLDR; the government is stopping me from receiving money and I’m at risk of going homeless and hungry

I’m on most money apps (PayPal, Venmo, cash app) as @ Heavytiredeyes and again, anything is appreciated

[monstersdownthepath]

Monster Spotlight: Bogeyman

CR 10

Neutral Evil Medium Fey

Bestiary 3, pg. 42 (pic taken from Adventure Path: Extinction Curse: Legacy of the Lost God, pg. 79)

For years, FOR! YEARS! I’ve wanted to do an article on the Bogeyman. This monster has a very special spot in my heart, because around 10 years ago when I was just getting into tabletop stuff, I found a copy of Bestiary 3 on a game store shelf and flicked it open. After flicking past Behemoths and Asura, the most striking image to hit my eyes was what appeared to be a clown in a jaunty tophat and an absolutely menacing set of chompers. While by no means my favorite creature in Bestiary 3, my earliest memory of Pathfinder content was seeing that garish purple-and-red beast masquerading as a human, and as such the Bogeyman held a special place in my heart.

Which made it absolutely heartbreaking when my every attempt at extracting its picture from the PDF for use on this blog ended up looking HIDEOUS in a way my brain couldn’t reconcile with. As such, my first-ish exposure to Pathfinder languished... up until recently, with the release of 2nd Edition and a whole host of updated art for a WHOLE bunch of critters! While this Bogeyman isn’t my favorite--I’ll always love the bright purple bastard from 3--it certainly still portrays the mood of the Bogeyman in a way I enjoy. There’s plenty of Fey who cause fear for their own amusement, more than a few who eat it in some fashion, but Bogeymen are fear. They’re terror incarnate, they’re living nightmares, they’re the villain of a thousand stories and they know it, they revel in it, they wear it on their sleeves!

Bogeyman delight in finding singular victims and haunting them for days or even weeks, silently lurking under beds, within closets, in attics, or in basements, occasionally using Ghost Sound to create eerie noises, Darkness to cut the lights, or even Invisibility to quietly stalk their victims from their very own shadows until the haunted soul is on the verge of a breakdown. They’re artisans of terror, delicately crafting every moment of their target’s life of fear, plaguing them with Nightmares by night and by day whispering horrid thoughts into the victim’s ears from an invisible vantage point, making them lash out against friends and family to assure they’re entirely isolated when the malevolent Fey finally decides to end their lives. 

Like many creeping terrors, Bogeymen prefer to keep out of combat unless they’re sure they can win, remaining in the background otherwise. Unlike many creeping terrors, this should by no means make you think they’ll fold easily. They have high saves for their CR, DR 15/cold iron, and 21 SR, but their most infuriating defense is their ability to go invisible at will. Bogeymen are as maddeningly patient in combat as they are when seasoning their victims, flitting in and out of sight with Invisibility and exploiting their titanic +35 to Stealth checks to slither among combatants and find out where they’re weakest, physically and emotionally. Even an invisible Bogeyman can make use of its +28 to Intimidation checks to shake up anyone who can hear it speak as it waits for an opening, something it’s very keen on doing because as you may expect, Bogeymen are all about fear!

They live for fear, gaining Fast Healing 5 if someone within 30ft of them is suffering from any level of it. 30ft is, coincidentally, the range of their Deepest Fear aura, and illusion that shapes itself into the worst fears of anyone who views it. Failing a DC 25 Will save means you’re shaken as long as you’re in the aura, but succeeding the save renders one immune to it for 24 hours... but that just won’t do, will it? We can’t have someone NOT be afraid, so if someone succeeds and maintains a brave face, the Bogeyman disappears once more to Intimidate them, either through the skill check or with their claws. Their 1d8+1 damage claws aren’t really all that scary, but the burst of +6d6 from their Sneak Attack will probably make both the character AND the player jump. Both claws crit on a 19 or 20, and being critically hit by their claws causes Striking Fear to mount up. Failing another DC 25 Will save while already suffering from a fear effect compounds the fear, moving shaken to frightened, frightened to panicked, and panicked to paralyzed with fear (and thus vulnerable to being torn to shreds by Sneak Attack). While relying on crits is... well, unreliable at best, someone being hit even once while already shaken removes that person from the fight for several rounds, as frightened creatures must flee unless cornered, potentially giving the Fey deadly amounts of breathing room so it can recover and slip away... or savage a different, more vulnerable target.

Or just instantly kill someone who’s proven they’re a threat to it. For whatever demonic reason, Paizo decided to give them 3 castings of Quickened Phantasmal Killer each day! The moment it pops out of invisibility to Sneak Attack someone, it may be able to just take out someone else nearby with a glance! If your party doesn’t have any protection from fear, an encounter with a Bogeyman may go from tough to unwinnable in a single round.

If you can weather their initial Sneak Attack and have a way to counter their invisibility (like a sack of flour), things get much simpler. Adding onto that, anything that’s not afraid of them, either because it passed its save against the aura or was unaffected by it in the first place (in case you needed another reason to put Unbreakable Heart in your spell list), takes an enormous bite out of its offense and its defense and can potentially leave it floundering. Even with that weakness, Bogeymen still have access to Hold Person at 3/day to use against creatures they cannot terrify and Suggestion at will to manipulate them so they’re not ENTIRELY helpless against Paladins; keep that in mind if you’re going fey-hunting!

As a closing note, it’s a little funny to me that Bogeymen don’t actually have Darkvision, so their at-will Darkness--which would otherwise be an excellent tool to get in more Sneak Attacks--is just as much and impediment to them as it is to everyone else. It’s also extremely ironic that they’re not immune to fear effects, so any telepathic creature that succeeds against their Phantasmal Killer can turn it back around against them, potentially killing them with their own ability!

You can read more about them here.

[mockerycrow]

Any advice on how to write fanfics? What has helped you in your experience? I'm thinking of writing on e I finish the COD: MW games and also do some Darkest Dungeon afterwards because my desire to write angst is making my ears emit 1930's cartoon smoke out of my ears

Okay, so,,, I don’t know how helpful I’ll be with this, but I’ll try, anon!!

TIP #1: Read. This sounds so simple, but I promise you that reading books and other pieces of fanfiction has helped me a lot with my own writing. I do advise reading actual physical original books too, because don’t get me wrong! Reading other authors’ fanfic pieces will help, but I’ve personally have gotten a lot of my experience through authors and books such as the exorcist. I highly recommend reading classic poems if you have a tough time with describing feelings and using metaphors! [I personally have copies of many works of Charles Baudelaire. I also have a copy of The Bell Jar.]

TIP #2: Use synonyms. Synonyms of different words keep you from directly repeating yourself over and over, so instead of saying “___ Said.” over and over, you could say; “___ replied curtly.” “___’s tone was somber as they began,” It also completely depends on the tone of the characters mood. Are they angry? Are they frightened? Are they happy? You gotta ask yourself these questions. You don’t even have to specify who’s speaking if you describe their action before the dialogue. For Example: Soap stared at you blankly as he watched you overfill your cup of coffee, letting out a chuckle. “Tired this mornin’, aye?”

TIP #3: Use music. I have entire playlists dedicated to characters that I listen to as I write for them. It doesn’t have to be complete accurate songs either, it can be songs that also remind you of them. I use songs to write more in character, as well as set the mood for the fic. Is this fic sad? I find sad music that I can relate back to said character. Is this character a particular angsty one? Find songs that relate to their trauma, or at least how they would respond to a conflict situation.

TIP #4: Do not force yourself to write if you feel burnt out. This is a big one! I may have a lot of WIPs, but I don’t allow myself to complete ones I don’t feel too confident about in that moment. I take a step back, maybe complete other works first—and it may be weird to others who read your stuff, maybe you answer a day old ask immediately but answer a 2 week old ask 3 days later? Go at your pace. At the end of the day, it’s YOUR decision to write.

I may have more tips, so I might add them later! (june 17th, 2023)

[marcarella-pizza]

Oh yeah guess what arrived last week~

Buddy Daddies Vol 4!

So I actually have to admit something, I repurchased the entire Buddy Daddies series so that I could get the special box for all of the volumes. (I’m whacko I knowwww)

Unfortunately this means that Vol 4-6 are all stuck in Japan until the final Vol release and the entire series can ship to me from my friend.

What does this mean?

1. I can’t share an in-depth detail of the contents in any volumes until I receive them at the end of next month

2. I will own a spare copy of the first three volumes - this includes Drama CDs 1 and 2. Before I list it online, I’m opening up to anyone who would like to buy them off me, to DM me! First come first serve, I’ll be selling them for the exact price I paid. If you’re interested, please check HERE

3. I will not have a physical copy of the last two drama cds until August, that being said, there’s a master list HERE of all audio components that have been put together by the lovely @moriokart , so I’ll use those to translate. It just may mean I may take a while longer, depending on when/if they upload the audio drama files to there~

That’s it from me for now Buddy Daddies fandom~

[m0onjellies]

I’m copying @chaotic-but-cute’s 30 days of intentionality challenge because lowkey I do want to try to be better at existing as a human especially approaching finals, so here are my goals

1. Health/hygiene:

Shower/do skincare/ brush and floss everyday - I often neglect my physical health if I have too much work which is bad actually

Exercise or just touch grass at least once or twice a week - I’m signing up for karate that’s thrice a week, but with finals approaching idk how practical it is to go all 3 days. I don’t want to set an unrealistic goal for myself!!

2. Academics/Extracurriculars

For all of these, double the time on weekends

Practice piano for at least half an hour a day

Spend at least 30 minutes doing homework at home. Even if I’ve finished all of the homework that is due immediately already at school, it is best practice to at least spend some time doing homework at home, just to build that routine

1-1.5 hours a day at least on speech and debate work leading up to the tournament. After the tournament, replace this time with studying for finals

2-2.5 hours a day copying art history notes. I need to have this done ASAP, so im dedicating a lot of time to it. Hopefully if I’m consistent, I’ll be done by Wednesday or Thursday

Prep for finals for at least an hour a day (and 3-3.5 hours a day once I’m done with art history)

Start this before 5. I tend to get home and do nothing for a stupid amount of time which is bad. - to help with this I’d like to start planning out my time in a calendar, but I’m not gonna beat myself up over it if the calendar fails

Go to a coffee shop or a library or smth to study at least once a week for enrichment

3. Other personal goals

Read at least 5 pages/day of any book and 30 pages/day on weekends. I want to make reading a habit so it becomes fun again. I miss music being fun

Spend a little bit of time (even if it’s just 10 minutes) researching activities I want to do in the future!

Clean my room every week

Indulge in a little bit of whimsy and fun! Listen to music I like or draw or do something other than scroll and feel numb

Wear fun little outfits to school! I love looking hot, however I’m usually too tired to do so. I’m not gonna beat myself up for wearing a hoody and pants for the 200th time this year however I will try to have fun at least 10 times this month

Listen to music while waking up - again, not that big of a priority, but I always feel good when I do it and it’s not hard, so I should do it more

I really hope this goes well!! If it does, I may try to make another one for summer break, however that one may be personal and not posted, we’ll see. All of my posts for this will be under ares.txt and 30days.txt!

[thelostbaystudio]

The Lost Bay update

Hey folks, sorry I've been away for a while, I've been busy working on The Lost Bay - First Look., and I’ve just dropped the latest update!

I think we’ve reached a milestone here!

What’s new?

1.An Area generation/exploration procedure for the Sleep Country district. You can generate 10 000 000+ different areas with just a few dice rolls!

In the last few weeks I chatted with members of the community asking how they’d want the exploration tables to be designed. Here's the feedback that I got.

Half of the folks said they’d want more lore injected in the tables, to get a better sense of the game world.

The other half asked for modular tables that allowed for maximum replayability.

With this update I think I’ve reached a nice compromise, not going too much into details here, but basically I’ve split where + who + what into separate tables. The procedure is highly reusable, and the what table entries have strong moods that help define the setting. And, you asked for it, the tables are written taking into consideration solo play.

2.A beautiful map designed by Strega Wolf van den Berg, it’s so exciting to see a physical representation of the Bay!

3.Two non-human NPCs: the Dogpack and the Spider Nest. I had fun designing those two, particularly their Moves. Moves are a simple way to give personality to the NPCs you create, and to make combat a surprising and fun experience.

4.I’ve modified combat rules and a few other mechanics, the game engine is more consistent, quicker, simpler. Small tweaks that have great effects. If you are planning to play the game I’d recommend downloading the latest version. You might not notice all the revisions, but trust me, they’ll make the gameplay experience better.

What’s coming up next?

Not 100% sure in what order, but here are the things I’m working on:

A couple more Vibes (playable character classes)

A new Reborn Vibe (post-mortem playable character class)

More NPCs

Exploration tables for the Mall Nation district

Errands prompts (solo and group adventure prompts)

Solo support (oracle, and complications table)

Better online character keeper/sheets

And the Creator Kit

Creator Kit and Third party publisher license

As I’ve mentioned a few times already, the development of the game has been influenced so much by the feedback of the community. And I know that several of you have plans about making supplements/adventures for TLB. The Creator Kit, which will probably drop with the next update, is intended to support the community and the creation of 3RD party modules. It’s a series of guidelines and toolkits to facilitate adventure design, like: take off checklist, tips, designer commentary, and modules you can use to build the next kick ass TLB thing.

Along with the release of the Creator Kit will come the Third Party Publisher license, I’ll reveal more about it in the next update. 

If you haven't done yet, grab the game! If you're on a limited budget don't worry, Community Copies are regularly available for free https://the-lost-bay.itch.io/thelostbayrpg

Have a great day/week

Iko