#so i said i was recovering this is how I recover apparently HAHA

[yeehawpim]

meet you on the way out

hi candela ch2 finale gave me emotions and now I'm making it everyone's problem 😂

[doctorbitchcrxft]

The Kids Are All Right | Supernatural Series Rewrite | Dean Winchester x Fem!Reader

Pairing: Dean Winchester x Fem!Reader

Warnings: recovering from an assault (heed this warning pls my loves), canon gore, canon violence, angst

Word Count: 4773

A/N: Heyyyy.... accidentally posted two at the same time haha. No episode this Saturday as a result; I'm sorry, y'all!! But a little extra treat today!!

Mobile Supernatural Series Rewrite Masterlist

Supernatural Series Rewrite Masterlist

Supernatural Series Rewrite Playlist

You and Sam spoke almost twice daily after your heart-to-heart leaving Lincoln. You were incredibly grateful to still have his friendship; even if your phone calls had to be carefully maneuvered around times when Dean was in the room. 

You were unsure how to feel about the fact that Sam was still trying to find ways to break Dean’s deal knowing he’d die if that happened but would also support your friend in whatever his decision was. You refused to have any involvement in picking between the lives of the two brothers, though, even if you were falling deeper and deeper in love with him with each passing day. 

Just the thought of seeing him again was enough to have butterflies swirling in your stomach. You were terrified of what he’d say to you, yes, but you missed him so dearly. As chaotic as he could be at times, he truly was your rock. And with each day that passed, the sore pang in your heart at the thought of him seemed to intensify.

Not to mention, your struggle with your assault was draining you. Your heart hurt every time you walked past a mirror, and every once in a while, you’d see yourself in that guard uniform.

“Where are you guys?” you asked Sam through the phone as you walked around your motel room pulling clothes on.

“Cicero, Indiana,” Sam replied.

Your heart and stomach dropped. “What?”

“No way you’re here, too,” Sam began to laugh.

“This isn’t fucking funny, Sam! I purposefully picked a case that seemed like it wouldn’t pan out to stay away from him!” you replied frantically. “I mean, ‘guy falls on his own power saw’ doesn’t exactly scream unsolved mysteries!”

Sam was still laughing, but cleared his throat before talking again. “Yeah, but Dean’s cruisin’ for a hookup, too. That’s his main motivation, I think.”

You scoffed and ignored the burning feeling in your chest. “Of course, he is. Who is it this time?”

“Lisa Braeden. His… five day road trip from about eight years ago,” Sam explained. 

“Oh,” you breathed out. “Gumby girl.”

“So you know of her,” Sam said.

“Oh, yeah! After one of the first times we had sex, he told me I gave Gumby Girl a run for her money. ‘Best sex of my life before you’ is a direct quote,” you told him.

“Okay, ew,” Sam grimaced. “I don’t need to hear about your sex life—”

“It was topically relevant, Sam!”

“—and this is apparently one of his ‘dying wishes’.” 

“Way to let me down easy, jackass,” you sassed at the brunet’s clear inability to read the room in this situation. 

“Sorry,” he said sheepishly.

“It’s fine. I’ll leave. Let Dean have his fun,” you continued.

“No, don’t!” Sam begged. “At least stay till tomorrow so we can meet for coffee. I’m sure Dean ‘ll still be out with Gumby.”

“We should probably call that poor woman by her actual name,” you giggled. “But sure. I’ll stay till then.”

“Great!” You could practically hear Sam grinning on the other end of the phone. “I’ll call you when I get up tomorrow.”

“Okay,” you smiled. “Bye, Sammy.”

***

Someone pounding on your door at around one in the morning woke you up with a start. Swiftly, you put the barrel of your gun to the door and listened because there was no peephole for you to look through. You opened the door a crack when you heard nothing for a moment to reveal Dean staring at the ground before looking up at you.

Shocked, you slammed the door in his face and threw your gun at your bed. Unfortunately, you’d forgotten to lock the door behind you, and Dean waltzed into your bedroom.

“(Y/N), you can’t leave,” the man told you.

“What the fuck are you doing here, Dean? How did you even find me?!” you cried. “What, you think after three weeks of not talking I’m just gonna let you— Especially after you just fucked Gumby Girl—!” You began pacing around the room.

“I didn’t fuck Gumby Girl, (Y/N),” he said softly, still standing close to the door.

You scoffed and crossed your arms, suddenly very aware of the underwear and oversized band t-shirt you wore to bed that night. “Yeah, right.”

“I’m serious,” he replied, still staring at the ground. His hands stayed in his leather jacket pockets. “Couldn’t bring myself to even try.”

You threw your arms out in frustration. “What, am I supposed to forgive you for not fucking one out of the many Sam’s been telling me about you being with since I left?!”

Dean seemed stunned.

“Yeah! So, I’m sorry, but you’re not just gonna waltz in here and act like everything’s fine and dandy,” you chortled coldly.

“Are you gonna give me a chance to explain myself?” he questioned angrily.

“Why should I?” you scoffed.

“Because you love me! I thought that was the whole point!” he argued.

You stared him down, eyebrows drawn together. “Well, you obviously don’t love or respect me enough not to go fuck random girls literal days after I leave.”

“I do!” he shot back. “Would you just fucking listen? I was drinking alone when Sam thought I was with those other chicks.”

You said nothing, still glaring at him.

“I didn’t fuck any of them, (Y/N), ‘cause I couldn’t stop thinking about you!”

Tension hung thick in the air between the two of you, and you looked up at him with dewey eyes. When you couldn’t stand to hold his gaze anymore, you turned away. “Why didn’t you call? Why didn’t you… say it back? Say anything back?” Your voice broke while you talked. 

“I should’ve,” Dean replied quietly. “I- I’m sorry I didn’t.”

A tear slipped down your cheek. “I’m sorry, too. I shouldn’t have left you guys with those demons.”

You felt Dean’s fingers gently graze your arm, and he waited for you to flinch away for a moment. When you didn’t, he reached out and gingerly turned you to face him and held you to his chest. 

You melted into him almost immediately and let all of the emotion you’d been holding back for the past three weeks out. He rested his head on top of yours and just held you there for a minute. 

“I can’t watch you die, Dean,” you told him, still hugging him tightly. “I can’t do it.”

“I’m not asking you to,” he said. “Can you just… stick around till my time is up?” He gently pushed you away from him slightly to turn your eyes up to meet his gaze. “Please? It’s my dying wish.”

You giggled through your tears but nodded. You immediately dove back into his chest. “I don’t want you to leave,” you whispered. 

“I don’t wanna leave you,” he said, voice beginning to shake. “But I couldn’t let ‘im die, (Y/N). I couldn’t do it.” “I know,” you nodded. 

The two of you stood there holding each other once more until Dean spoke up again. “And, uh… ditto, by the way.”

“What?” you snorted, pulling away from him. 

“What you said… at Bobby’s,” he explained, avoiding your eyes.

“You love me?” you asked, smiling lopsidedly.

Dean just nodded. 

“And you told me just by saying ‘ditto’?” You burst out into laughter at Dean’s attempt at vulnerability. 

Dean went red in the face and turned away. 

“No, no!” you said, immediately quieting down. “It’s just— that was so cute. You’re adorable when you can’t emote properly.”

“Shut up,” he grumbled, tilting your chin up to kiss you passionately and effectively silence your laughter. You closed your eyes and wrapped your arms around his neck immediately; almost like a reflex. 

When you pulled away, you leaned your forehead against Dean’s. 

“You know I’m not letting you leave again,” he said.

“Wouldn’t dream of it,” you smiled. 

***

You sat on the bed facing a shirtless Dean who was reclining against the headboard on a pillow while he told you his story from yesterday. He lazily drew circles on your outermost hip with his thumb as he talked. 

“So, I went to her house, right? ‘Cause… y’know. Gumby Girl,” he began sheepishly. “And, uh, turns out, she’s got a son.”

“Jesus, really?” you replied. “I forget most people have kids at our age.”

“See, this is where it gets interesting,” Dean continued. “So I go out to the backyard, and I see this kid, and (Y/N), I’m telling you, he looked just like me. Acted just like me, too. It felt like fuckin’ Freaky Friday.”

“Dean, don’t tell me—”

“Yeah, that’s what I thought, too,” he cut you off. “But no. Lisa said he’s not mine.”

“How do you know she’s not lying?” you asked. You finally processed the story Dean was telling you, and realization washed over you in tidal waves. “You could have a child. You might be his father. What the fuck.”

“Yeah, I know, I know,” he said. “It’s freakin’ me out, man. But that’s not all.”

“Dean, if this involves a paternity test that names you as a match, I’m gonna start freakin’ out,” you said.

“No, no, it doesn’t. At least, not yet,” he chuckled. 

You glared at him.

He laughed. “Anyway, I think there really is a case here. One of those kids at the party was weird.”

“Yeah, Dean, kids are weird. Any other earth-shattering news I should be aware of?” you snorted.

Dean deadpanned at you. “You know what I mean. She wasn’t standin’ all the way upright—”

“Maybe she just has scoliosis—” you cut in.

Dean kept talking over you. “—And she kept glaring at everybody—”

“—I glare at everybody—” you continued.

“—And it’s the kid whose dad fell on the power saw.”

You considered for a moment. “Okay, maybe there is something happening. But it could also just be how her grief is manifesting.”

“Yeah, but (Y/N), all kinds of freaky accidents have been happening all over the neighborhood,” Dean explained further. “People fallin’ off ladders, drowning in hot tubs—”

“Okay, maybe you’re right,” you sighed.

“What’s your hold-up with all this?” he asked.

“Whaddya think, Dean,” you deadpanned.

“What, Lisa?” He seemed genuinely shocked. 

“I just think we should leave this town in our rearview mirror. Y’know, between Gumby Girl and her kid that’s potentially yours— oh, god,” you muttered when you fully realized Dean might have a son.

“(Y/N), he’s probably not mine. I mean, she said he wasn’t,” Dean reminded you.

“Somehow, that’s not making me feel better,” you grumbled. 

Dean pulled you down toward him and gently kissed your lips.

“Dean—” you tried, but he cut you off with another kiss. “Dean—” and he kissed you again, “—you can’t just—” another kiss, “distract me with this stuff—” another kiss, “—when we’re in the middle of a serious discussion.”

Dean kissed you once more and pulled you to straddle his hips. “It’s working, isn’t it?”

“Unfortunately,” you smiled against his lips.

When Dean tried to grind up into you, though, you suddenly jerked back from him. 

He looked up at you in concern. “Are you okay?”

You shook your head, tears swimming in your eyes. “I— I’m sorry, I don’t know what’s—”

“It’s okay,” Dean assured you. “We don’t have to do anything. It’s alright.”

You laid down on Dean’s chest, closing your eyes and trying to steady your breathing. Dean kissed the top of your head and wrapped his arms around you to comfort you. Oh, how grateful you were to know him.

***

Later that day, you and Dean walked back to the Impala after investigating a few of the houses where accidents had happened recently. Nothing seemed out of the ordinary; no cold spots, no EMF, nothing resembling a creature’s lair. It was all very “Stepford” in Dean’s opinion.

When you’d almost reached the car, Dean abruptly grabbed your arm. You gasped slightly and turned to face the direction he was. 

“That’s him,” Dean whispered. “That’s the kid.”

You looked ahead at a little boy with spiky brown hair wearing a canvas jacket sitting sadly on a park bench. 

Dean slid his hand down your arm to your hand and pulled you along with him. “Hey, Ben,” he told the kid.

The boy looked up at Dean. “Hey. You were at my party.” Ben seemed to notice you for the first time. “ ‘Sup?” the little guy nodded at you, attempting to smirk through his apparent sadness. 

‘Jesus, this really might be Dean’s kid,’ you thought. 

“I'm Dean, this is (Y/N),” he said, sitting down next to Ben on the bench. You stood next to Dean cautiously. “Everything okay? Something wrong?” Dean asked Ben, who didn’t respond. 

You noticed the empty gaming console case Ben was holding and looked out to the field to see a group of four boys playing with something that looked just about the size to fit the case.

“Is that your game they're playing with?” the older Winchester asked Ben.

The little boy  wouldn’t look at you or Dean. “Ryan Humphrey borrowed it, and now, he won't give it back.”

Dean was immediately ready to beat up eight-year-olds. “Well, you want me to go—”

“No!” Ben exclaimed, grabbing Dean’s arm. “Don't go over there! Only bitches send a grown-up.”

Dean grinned. “You’re not wrong.”

This whole interaction was completely flooring you; rendering you unable to add anything to the conversation.

“And I am not a bitch,” Ben finished.

Dean pointed to a boy wearing long cargo shorts holding the gaming console. “Is that Humphrey? The one that needs to lay off the burgers?”

The little boy smiled and nodded.

Dean hummed. 

“Dean, what are you—”

He ignored you and turned to Ben to talk to him in a hushed voice. You couldn’t quite hear what Dean was telling him to do, and you were puzzled when Ben got up from the bench and started walking over to the group of boys.

“They’re gonna eat that poor kid alive, dude, what were you thinking?” you chastised him, shoving his shoulder lightly. 

“Just watch,” Dean urged.

Ben turned back around to the two of you, and Dean offered him a thumbs-up and a grin. 

A moment later, Ben turned away from the bullies before whipping back around and kicking the boy holding his game straight between his legs twice.

“Dean, what the fuck,” you sighed, pinching the bridge of your nose. 

Ben walked back to you and Dean, triumphantly smiling and holding his game. “Thanks! Dude, that was awesome!”

Suddenly, a gorgeous woman stormed up to you, Dean, and Ben. “Benjamin Isaac Braeden! What has gotten into you?!”

“Gumby Girl,” you realized. 

Dean smacked your thigh lightly to get you to be quiet.

“He stole my game!” Ben tried to explain.

“So you kick him? Since when is—” she looked down at Dean and scoffed. “Did you tell my son to beat up that kid?”

“What?” Dean was still smiling. “Somebody had to teach him how to kick the bully in the nads.”

“Who asked you to teach him anything?” Lisa argued.

“You’re right, he’s sorry,” you said, trying to pull Dean away.

“What are you even still doing here? We had one weekend together a million years ago. You don't know me. And you have no business with my son,” Lisa raged, grabbing Ben’s hand to walk off with him. “Just leave us alone.”

“He will!” you asserted, to both Lisa and Dean. 

Ben broke out of his mother’s grip and ran back to Dean, wrapping his arms around his legs in a tight hug. 

“Thanks,” Ben smiled up at Dean.

Your heart melted and broke at the sight. 

As Ben returned to his mother, you saw three children a few yards beyond them standing in a straight line and turning their heads in tandem. Dean seemed to have noticed, too, and the two of you decided to get out of there as quickly as possible.

When you got into the Impala, you couldn’t say a word. 

Dean looked over at you. “What?”

“What do you mean, ‘what’?” you replied.

“You look like you’re suckin’ on a lemon. C’mon, talk to me,” he urged.

“He really does seem like your kid,” was all you could manage to say.

Dean sighed. “Yeah, I know.”

“And, uh, if that does end up being the case—”

“Whoa, what?” Dean cut you off. “Since when am I following up with that?”

You sighed. “I don’t know, Dean, if you are his father, the kid deserves to have you in his life.”

“Sweetheart, the best thing I can do for that kid is get the hell away from him,” Dean replied. “He doesn’t need to be anywhere near me or this life.”

“Why?” you said. “ ‘Cause you think you’d be bad at it? You were great with him today.— y'know, aside from encouraging assault.”

“Yeah, (Y/N), for two seconds,” he said. “Why are you pushing this anyway?”

You paused. “I don’t know, I thought it might just be good for you. Give you an opportunity to live out your last year in peace. Happy.”

Dean’s posture softened, and he said nothing for a moment. “Thanks, but no. I’d take you and huntin’ evil sons of bitches over Middle America any day.” He reached out to you and pulled you to him, placing a kiss to the side of your head. 

***

When you arrived at the boys’ motel room, Sam was at his laptop researching. 

“Somethin’s wrong with the kids in this town,” you told him as you took your jacket off.

Sam replied without looking away from his computer, “Yeah. Tell me about it. So, what do you know about changelings?”

“Evil monster babies?” Dean questioned.

“No, not babies,” you chimed in.

“They're kids,” Dean realized. “Creepy, ‘stare at you like you're lunch’ kids?”

Sam nodded. “There's one at every victim's house.”

“Oh, that’s just perfect,” you mumbled.

“What?” Sam questioned. 

“We got a pile of missing kids being kept in a hole somewhere and a fuckton of changelings we gotta torch. Dean, where’s your kerosene?”

“Already on it,” he said, leaving the room.

“So, I’m guessing you talked things out,” Sam said once the door closed behind Dean.

“Oh, shut up,” you grumbled playfully. 

“So… you’re not leaving?” Sam questioned.

“No. Not yet, anyway,” you said, tone becoming more serious. “I’ll be there to tell him ‘bye,’ but I won’t watch him get dragged to hell. I can’t do that, Sam.”

The younger Winchester paused. “I get it. Hopefully, we won’t have to.”

Dean came back into the room not a moment later holding his torch and grinning.

“You and your gadgets,” you laughed warmly. 

“So, changelings can perfectly mimic children,” Sam began. “According to lore, they climb in the window, snatch the kid. Y'know, there were marks on the windowsill at one of the kid's houses. Looked to me like blood.”

“The changeling grabs a kid, assumes its form, joins the happy fam just for kicks?” Dean questioned.

“I wish that were the case,” you said. “Changelings feed on the mom’s synovial fluid. Sam, did you notice any strange bruising on their backs? It’d be just below the base of their neck?”

“Yeah, how’d you know that?” Sam asked you. 

“It’s the typical spot they feed from,” you replied. “On the end of their creepy, face-hugger-from-Alien tongues, they have these little spines that extend through the body to reach all those spaces between the joints. Pretty gnarly injuries.”

“Right,” Sam nodded. “Changelings can drain them for a few weeks before mom finally croaks.”

“And then, there's dad and the babysitter,” Dean added, referencing two of the victims.

“Yeah. Seems like anyone who gets between the changeling and its food source ends up dead,” Sam finished.

“And fire’s the only way to kill ‘em,” you said, nodding at Dean’s torch. “See why I was worried about all this?”

“Yeah,” Dean huffed. “Great.”

“According to lore, they stash the kids underground somewhere,” Sam continued, “I don't know why, but if it's true, the real kids might be out there.”

“We better start looking,” Dean asserted, seeming to have something on his mind.

“What?” you asked.

He hesitated before answering you with a question. “Any kid in the neighborhood is vulnerable?”

You nodded.

“We gotta make a stop. I wanna check on someone,” Dean told you, and you knew he meant Ben.

Dean held your gaze as Sam began to protest. “Well Dean, if the real kids are still alive, we don't have time. We—”

“We have to,” Dean stated firmly. 

***

Throughout the drive to Lisa’s house, you tried your best to remain calm. You weren’t truly worried about the potential that Ben could’ve been kidnapped or by the fact that Dean was upset, it was the thought of Lisa and Ben potentially taking Dean away from you. You knew your fear was irrational and maybe even a bit toxic, but you still worried that maybe Dean was still attracted to Lisa. Or maybe Dean was Ben’s dad and would be obligated to see and spend time around the two of them. The thought nearly made you throw up while you watched Dean knock on Lisa’s door. 

You saw Lisa yelling at him, and Dean ran back over to the Impala seeming incredibly worried. “They took Ben. He's changed,” Dean explained, hurriedly getting into the car.

“What?! Are you sure?” Sam questioned.

“Yeah, I'm sure. I checked his windowsill,” the older brother nodded.

“Blood?” 

“I don't think it is blood, and I think I know where the kids are.”

***

Dean drove quickly toward a house under construction with a large mound of red dirt sitting on the lawn outside of it. The exterior of the home was almost finished, and the “For Sale” sign on the lawn was stained partially by the dirt.

“Red dirt,” Sam noted, bending down to inspect the sign. “That's what was on the window.”

“Ah, you take the front,” Dean told Sam. “(Y/N), take the left side; I got the other.”

You nodded and set off, gun and flashlight drawn. You crept around the corners of the house until you came to a set of doors angled down to a cellar. You jumped down into it and found small, empty cages lining the walls.

“What do you think you're doing?” a voice suddenly asked from behind you. 

You looked up at the entrance of the cellar to see a redheaded woman glaring at you. 

“You’re staying here until I can get the police here,” the woman said, pulling out her phone.

“Wait, wait,” you tried. “I’m sorry, I was just looking for a place to stay for the night.”

“Then why do you have a gun?” she hissed.

“Self-defense,” you replied coolly. “Please, I’m sorry, I’ll go.”

The redhead tsked and shook her head. “I don’t think you will.” She stood from the entrance to the cellar and closed both doors on you.

“Wait, no!” You rushed toward the doors, but it was too late. She had latched them shut by the time you got to them. Immediately, you started banging on the doors and trying to get them open. You turned around to one of the cages and picked it up, hurling it at the closed doors. You tried again and again, using the cage to hit the door, your shoulder to slam into it, and even tried using a piece of wire from the cage to take off the hinges, but nothing worked. Helplessly, you banged on the door and screamed for Sam and Dean.

Suddenly, you began to smell smoke.

‘Oh, fuck,’ you thought, breath quickening with urgency. You slammed your body into the doors as hard as you could manage. 

Across the cellar from you, the flames began to catch the ceiling, creating a gaping hole in the floor for debris and fiery planks of wood to fall through. You slammed into the doors once more, screaming for Dean. 

The smoke in the room began to fill your lungs and forced a cough out of you. You screamed Dean’s name again hoarsely, turning around briefly to see the fire had spread incredibly close to you. If you didn’t get out soon, the whole building would collapse on your head.

“Dean, please!” you screamed. 

Suddenly, you heard the door to the cellar unlatching.

“(Y/N)?!”

“Dean!” you cried.

He threw the doors open and pulled you out of the smoldering building. He quickly checked you over for injuries, cupping the sides of your face. “You okay?”

“I’m fine. Let’s go!” You grabbed Dean’s hand and pulled him around to the front of the house, running as fast as your legs would carry you as flames taunted you dangerously close to your face. You ran across the street to where Sam was standing with a crowd of terrified children and Ben. 

“Sam!” you exclaimed. “Everybody okay?”

“Yeah, yeah, I think so,” Sam replied. 

Ben seemed shaken up, but he was trying to comfort the other kids around him. You smiled down at him. Dean was exactly the same way. No matter what was going on in his own head, he always checked on the needs of others first. It was one of the things you loved most about him; he was always showing you what compassion truly looked like. 

***

When the fire department had come and the children— all except for one— had been returned home, you and the boys drove Ben back to Lisa’s house. 

“Ben?!” the woman called, running out of the house. “Baby, are you okay?”

Ben ran to his mom and hugged her. “I'm okay, Mom.”

“Oh, my god,” Lisa sobbed. “What the hell just happened?”

“I'll explain everything if you want me to,” Dean started, “but, trust me, you probably don't. The important thing is that Ben's safe.”

“Thank you,” Lisa surged forward and hugged Dean. “Thank you.”

Dean seemed hesitant for which you were thankful, but still returned her hug.

Ben turned to head into his house, and Lisa moved to follow. She turned back to Dean apprehensively. “Do you— wanna come inside?” she asked. 

“Uh, no thanks,” Dean replied. “We, uh, gotta hit the road.”

Lisa nodded, deflating slightly. 

“But… you’re a hundred-percent sure Ben’s not mine, right?” Dean asked. 

She nodded and smiled. “You're off the hook. I did a blood test when he was a baby.”

“Oh,” Dean replied. “Good.”

“I... I swear you look disappointed,” Lisa noted.

“Yeah, I don't know. It's weird, you know your life... I mean, this house and a kid…” he trailed off. “It's not my life. Never will be. Some stuff happened to me recently, and, uh... Anyway, a guy in my situation— you start to think, y’know. I'm gonna be gone one day, and what am I leaving behind besides a car?”

“I don't know. Ben may not be your kid, but,” Lisa began, “he wouldn't be alive if it wasn't for you. That's a lot if you ask me.”

Dean nodded and turned back to you and his brother who stood by the car watching silently. “You know, just for the record…” He turned back to Lisa.  “You got a great kid. I would've been proud to be his dad.”

Lisa smiled at him, as did you, before Dean headed back to the driver’s seat. For once, Sam let you sit in the passenger’s seat, and you popped a Faith No More cassette into the Impala’s built-in player. 

***

A few hours into the drive, Sam had fallen asleep. You and Dean were left holding each other’s hand in silent support; a reassurance the other was there and okay. 

“Did you mean what you said earlier? To Lisa?” you murmured.

“About what?”

“Leaving nothing behind except a car?” you continued.

“Aw, c’mon—” Dean sighed. 

“No, Dean. That’s crap,” you quietly said. “You have a legacy. Everything you’ve ever done has been out of love and compassion. That is who you are. That’s what you’re leaving behind.”

Dean’s eyes flicked toward you, his expression unreadable. He was quite literally the only person to ever confuse your intuitive, watchful eye with his thoughtful, complicated expressions. 

The older Winchester turned his eyes back to the road and brought your entwined hands to his lips, kissing the backs of your knuckles. 

You reveled in the feeling, knowing the feeling of his lips on your skin in this moment, the pattern of Sam’s breathing steadily in the backseat, and the way his hand felt in yours would be a memory you’d need to hold onto when he was gone. Maybe that way, you’d be able to find peace; knowing that not even death could completely tear Dean away from you. 

Series Rewrite Taglist: @polireader @brightlilith @atcamillanorrman @jrizzelle @insomnia-bookworm @procrastination20 @mrs-liebgott @djs8891 @tiggytaylor @staple-your-mouth @jesstherebel @rach5ive @strawberrykiwisdogog @bruhidkjustwannaread @mxltifxnd0m @sunshine-on-marz @big-ol-boat @mgchaser @capncrankle @chervbs @simpingdeadcharacters @nesnejwritings @stillhere197 @tearsforhan @take-it-on-the-run @iloveyou2mia @maxinehufflepuffprincess @ohgeehowdigethere @seninjakitey @berarenado @s0urw00lf @princessleahorgana @quarterhorse19 @isla-finke-blog @silverdoragon @karacaroldanvers @gayandfairycore @examishbookwyrm @star-yawnznn @real-sharena-h @fandomloverrr @metalmonki @onlyangel-444 @yu-winchester @benniwiththefanni @daisychaingirl @immagods @missmieux @yoongi-holland @littledebbieinabigworld

[quitealotofsodapop]

Just read through the MKEgged tag, and where's Redson? I want to see the roller-coaster he goes on of "A baby!? Wait, who's the father If it can't be me? Oh, okay, no other parent. I'll step in and help, what do you mean the pregnancy has a high mortality rate!?"

Just this guy trying to figure out what he's feeling and how to handle things with this baby, because yay baby, but also No you're not allowed to die!"

Prev.

haha yes! XD

Red Son's bull-brain tells him "Whomst is the father!?" immediately, even if him and MK aren't in a fully romantic relationship yet. His infatuation tells him that only *he* can father Noodle Boy's progeny!

The fact that the pregnancy was magical in nature calms him down only a little bit... until he learns that MK's true species have a high maternal mortality rate due to this unique form of reproduction.

Red Son, busting on into MK's prenatal appointment: "Noodle Boy!! Who said that you're allowed to die!? I strictly forbid it!"

Red Son goes out of his way to investigate what knowledge is available on Stone Monkeys so he can devise a way to help MK survive and recover. He knocks on the door of every soul he can think of who would hold some idea of what to do; Lao Tzu, The Gold Star of Venus, and even Guanyin herself.

The alchemist and planet god both only had second-hand accounts of how Stone Monkeys lived, but provided copies of their literature all the same.

Approaching her old master was a little awkward, but the Bodhisattva Guanyin is a patron god of safe childbirth, and Red Son wanted to have their input on the matter. To her surprise, Guanyin was equally concerned for MK's well-being - and had already offered to attend the birth to ensure that they could monitor MK and the baby. Red Son learns from Guanyin that Sun Wukong himself had such questions many centuries ago, but curiously dropped the matter sometime after the Journey. Former master and disciple share a warm goodbye, finally reunited by their worry over a noodle monkey-boy.

Xiwangmu was still mourning the loss of her husband, so Red Son thought it improper to bother her on such a matter - but clearly Lao Tzu or Gold Star blabbed. The very next time Red Son stepped into the Celestial Realm, he found himself swept into a suffocating hug by the Queen Mother of the West.

Xiwangmu, weeping: "Oh, my little fire opal. You are so proactive! Scouring the Heavens and Earth to find a way to save your mate and child!" Red Son, confused: "EHH!?!?"

Turns out, the Queen Mother had a gut-reaction to hearing that her grandson's beloved ("WHO TOLD!?" shrieks Red) Monkey Prince was pregnant. And that reaction was; "GREAT-GRANDCUBS?!?!"

Red Son barely has a second to object. The Queen Mother weeps how the Jade Emperor is to miss the birth of his first great-grandchild, but that the pregnancy is a light in a very dark time for her and the court. She orders her court secretary to give Red Son unlimited access to the celestial library so that he can continue his research.

After the whirlwind of discovering that apparently even Heaven itself blames him for MK's Egg, Red Son turns to only two known members of the Noodle Boy's species.

Sun Wukong and the Six Eared Macaque.

The Macaque was the most difficult to get information out of since he kept slipping into the shadows whenever Red brought up questions on his species. Luckily one attempt/battle (it got out of hand) lead to the appearance of Sun Wukong on the scene.

Wukong: "What's the issue, firecracker?" Red Son, holding thick notepad: "I need to understand your species so I can devise a way to prevent MK's stone egg from killing him!" Macaque, turns off powers: "Oh! Why didn't you say so? I thought you were trying to dissect me or something!" XD Wukong: "We know almost everything there is on our species, so fire away kiddo." Red Son: "Yes! Finally! Question 1; in the case of self-spawned eggs, is the child a genetic clone of the parent?" Wukong & Macaque: (*both shake their heads*) Wukong: "Oh no. Its not a clone. You see, the Egg absorbs Dao from it's surroundings - not just it's parent. So it steals bits of DNA from whatever troop happens to be around. You know like friends, family-" Macaque, slyly: "Former mates." Wukong: "Former ma- hey!" (*glares*) Red Son, thinking: "So an additional source of life energy could supplement MK's own depleted supply?" Wukong: "Yeah... but the healthiest option is usually a dear friend or life partner. Someone who can cling to them and supply the most juice. Also helpful if the pregnant person wants their kid to look like their fave person." Macaque, knowing smile: "Or... whoever they have a big crush on." Red Son: (*hair-flames briefly flicker pink in blush as he imagines a red-furred baby monkey with calf hooves*) Red Son: "Wait. How come you both know so much about this topic? I know Sun Wukong has access to the celestial library, but Macaque has been barred from the palace grounds since the rebellion! Why do you share the same knowledge?" Wukong & Macaque: (*both start spluttering and choking on air*) Wukong, trying to find words: "You see-! We uh...!" Macaque: (*fades into background at 50% opacity, hiding face in scarf*) Red Son, realising: "Ah. I see. Thank you for your input, gentlemen." Wukong: "Where are you going now?" Red Son: "I'm going over to Noodle Boy's place. I have been invited for company." (*Red Son leaves. Macaque phases back in*) Wukong: "Well. The Egg might not be her doing. But she certainly wishes it was." Macaque: "I'm just glad they didn't try getting more out of us." Wukong, cheeky grin: "Like what? How we both know so much about Stone Eggs because once upon a time we wanted some of our own?" Macaque: (*hides face in scarf again*) "Shut up, peaches."

As for the Demon Bull parents? Well..

PIF, calmly writing letters: "Even if the child was not made the traditional fashion, we will both adore them all the same. I expect any grandchildren of mine to be as beloved as a prince or princess ought to be." DBK, arms full of baby shower gifts: "Make sure to note the exact hour, day, month, and year of the child's birth! It's very important for divining the calf's fortune!" Red Son, flames twitching: "Are you two-!? ARE YOU PLANNING A ROYAL BIRTH ANNOUNCEMENT!?" PIF: "Do not shout dear. My mother visited shortly after you left. Seems that a certain child of mine has been asking around about celestial monkeys and safe magical birthing practices, and it's stirred the court's rumour mill. Me and the simians are planning a formal announcement once the child arrives." Red Son, blushing pink: "I would have gone through the same effort if I only considered them a mere ally." PIF: "I know you would. But a mere ally, does not donate so much life energy to the parent in hopes that the child becomes theirs." Red Son: (*blush grows even bigger, flames spit embers onto the surrounding furniture*) PIF, brushes embers off of desk: "Hopefully, Xiaotian doesn't experience the terrible heartburn I did whilst carrying you." Red Son: "Mother!" DBK, wincing with sympathy: "Only exacerbated by your cravings, my love! You had a great desire for charcoal and spiced meat on the bone."

MK texts Red Son a few hours later asking if he'd like to go out for some barbecue; "Just started craving it for some reason. Oh! And we should make sure to get cheese tea too! Acid reflux acting up rn and I need something to quench the flame."

Red is so down bad.

It's not all sunshine and baby monkeys though - there is genuine worry across the families about MK's condition. None more so than the men who raised him.

(*Red is leaving MK's place after a hang out session, when a certain pig-man in the kitchen speaks up*) Pigsy: "Hey... thanks for being there for him." Red Son, surprised: "Huh? Oh! No problem..." Pigsy: "I know you like him. Like, like-like him. I don't exactly approve but.... you've been going out of your way to find ways to help me. Make sure he..." Pigsy: (*trails off, eyes puffy*) Red Son: (*quietly approaches, awkwardly places a hand on Pigsy's shoulder*) Pigsy: "Promise me something." Red Son: "Ok." Pigsy: "If the worst happens... I want you to still be there. For them. Not just because you like him. But because you really care about him and his kid." Red Son, certain: "I do. I truly care for Xiaotian. And I wish to be there for him through it all. And if the unthinkable were to occur, I would still be there for them." Pigsy, wipes tears with sleeve: "Thanks, punk." Red Son: "Again, no problem." Pigsy, changing tone: "Now! What's with this letter I got saying MK and his baby are gonna be presented to the Heavenly and Infernal Court?" Red Son, remembers previous encounters: "oops."

Once he fully explains the misunderstanding in heaven, Pigsy whacks Red with a spatula.

[rubra-wav]

Omgg, I need a Rosie x fem!Reader fic, where she introduces you to Alastor like her partner 😭💕

Rosie x introducing reader to Alastor

A/N: Today is Rosie day apparently bc I got 2 reqs I'm gonna be (hopefully at least) getting written abt her today.

I'm really sorry I just realised you said fic on this one, lmk if you'd like me to write it as a proper fic 💀

Cw: Sfw, Fem reader, slightly twisted fluff, cannibalism, kinda messed up relationship origin story haha

- When Rosie had brought out the tea set with a mixture of treats for Alastor and herself, and different sweets for you, you could feel yourself getting anxious about the meeting to come.

- You'd been dating the overlord for a little while now. With the 7th month approaching, Rosie wanted you to meet one of her longest friends.

- Wanted to solidify that you were her girlfriend more permanently.

- The public eye wasn't on you at all luckily due to you living in a town surrounded by ravenous cannibals who would protect you with tooth and nail due to dating their leader.

- However, during the time you'd been together, Rosie continued to receive suitors, which was uncomfortable for both of you.

- So she figured that she would start trying to make an effort to tell people she was in a completely monogamous relationship, one person at a time. Starting with her good friend Al, naturally.

- You truly didn't mind, but it was a little bit nerve-wracking meeting another overlord. Especially one who was long time friends with your lover.

- Rosie noticed you fidgeting nervously with your hands, looking down at the table set out before you.

- She let out a soft sigh and put down the box of tea bags she had been fussing with the choices of, walking to stand behind you and place her hands on your shoulders.

- "You'll be fine, heart! He's gonna love you. Maybe even half as much as I do!" She chuckled as your slightly unsure face peered backwards up at her.

- She leaned down to place a soft kiss on your forehead, prompting you to relax and smile softly.

- As she did so, there was the sound of someone clearing their throat behind the two of you.

- You two turned to see the very recognisable Radio Demon standing there looking somewhat uncomfortable at the display of affection. You didn't even hear him approach the outdoor sitting area.

- "Good afternoon, ladies." Alastor recovered quickly as Rosie moved to properly greet him with a big hug, and you rose from your seat with a somewhat strained smile.

- As the two cannibal overlords embraced, you got a stab of being out of place... inadequate in comparison. I mean, you were just some nobody dating the (essentially) mayor of cannibal town, you were surely out of place in such company.

- You were knocked from your thoughts as you felt your hand taken and shaken, Alastor leaning down to get a closer look at you with an elated grin.

- "And you must be (name)! Brilliant to meet you darling, Rose has told me so much about you, it really is a pleasure!" He exclaimed, shaking your hand so enthusiastically you thought you might fall over if he kept it up.

- "Y-yes! It's very nice to meet you Al-" you startled, before correcting yourself. "Alastor! I mean. Sorry!" You apologised profusely for addressing him so informally.

- The man shook his head with a staticky bark of laughter. "Nonsense! Anyone who's this close to Rosie I see as a friend! Do feel free to call me Al, darling." He let go of your hand, finally ceasing the relentless handshake to go and take a seat at the table, musing to himself the whole way about how fun this was going to be.

- Rosie laughed softly at the surprise on your face, wrapping an arm around your lower back and guiding you toward the loveseat across from your grinning guest.

- Afternoon tea with Alastor went along swimmingly despite your prior stress about it.

- The whole time, your fingers were laced together with Rosie's as the three of you laughed and conversed cordially.

- "So, do tell me, how did you ladies meet one another?" Alastor asked, taking a sip of his tea with his red eyes flicking between the two of you.

- You laughed awkwardly, looking to Rosie with a slightly hesitant expression as to whether you should tell the truth exactly or not.

- Rosie shrugged, somewhat hesitant about it as well.

- You gulped, recollecting it all. "Well, my Rose and I met under.. inopportune circumstances." You said slowly, voice raising an octave at the end.

- Alastor put down his cup of tea with his eyebrows raised expectantly. "Oh~?" He looked all the more curious now.

- You took a deep breath, and Rosie chuckled next to you. "Well," Rosie picked up where you left off. "It's kind of funny now, but wasn't at the time that's for sure. She stumbled into the town's walls with a bleeding knee and the cannibals converged on her, trying to take her as a gift for me. It was my birthday the day afterwards, you see." The cannibal explained, talking with her hands as she told the story.

- Alastor looked at you in surprise. "My, that would have been quite a strange situation for you (name)."

- "it... sure was, yes. They brought me to her gagged and wrapped up in a big pink ribbon." You thought back in some unsureness. "They wanted to cook my heart particularly for her birthday meal, but wanted her to actually approve of me before serving me."

- Alastor laughed loudly at your words, shaking his head as he fought to compose yourself. "And what, she decided you looked like you tasted bad?" He looked at Rosie for more context, to find her shaking her head with a somewhat irritated look on her face.

- "Not at all, she looked far too good to eat. People like my husband belong on a platter, not those like my heart," Rosie looked to the side down at you with a fond smile. "I knew that even before we spoke."

- You blushed and smiled warmly at her, squeezing her hand as you looked lovingly up at her.

- "The second I looked into those big beautiful black eyes of her's, I knew I wanted to be with her. Weird I know to be on someone's literal chopping block and thinking that way." You chuckled, looking back at Alastor with a grin.

- Alastor grinned right back at you, expression softening slightly as he leaned his cheek on his palm. "Yes, however I'm glad to see that Rosie seems to be so happy with you. You two make an excellent pair from what I've seen."

- You and Rosie chuckled, agreeing with him. Definitely.

Helpppp now I kinda wanna write a prequel part 2 for their meeting aaa. I could call it 'Eat Your Heart Out or Give You Mine.'✨️😭

Or sumn like that.

[bridgetotheskyyy]

snapshot.

summary: Deidara meets a superfan

warnings: Smut, 18+, rough sex, choking, pool sex, reader has a bit of a description, reader is complex, mentions of killing

word count: 6.9k

a/n: I had this idea shortly after conceptualizing Apprentice and while I was, like 70 or 80% done with that fic. And now we have this fucking 7k monster. I consider this to be a spiritual successor to Apprentice, maybe a oppositional series of events even? Idk, you decide lol. There are even some similar words and wordy allusions that you may catch haha. Hope you enjoy!

read on ao3 here. (recommended for extra notes)

Kisame’s wicked cackles reverberated across the cavern walls, summoned from the pit of his stomach; Deidara was sure he would pass out sooner rather than later. 

“It seems,” Pain began, eyeing the sculpture in the center of the room, “you have an admirer, Deidara.” 

Deidara’s brow twitched as a blush snuck across his face. His eyes roved over the sculpture ― the naked sculpture.

Tobi threw up his hands in laudation. “It’s so pretty! ”

Kisame laughed harder ― if it was possible. 

“I have taken it upon myself to apologize to (Y/n),” Pain continued over the cackling. “She’s one of our main contributors, after all; we would be amiss to upset her.” 

“When …” Deidara’s brow held a life of its own, “... did she send this?”

“No clue; I had Kisame retrieve it,” Pain explained. “Apparently, we sent the wrong member to entertain her.”

Kisame’s hand hugged the wall. “You’re damn right! ” 

It was as subtle a joke as could be achieved by Pain and it still wasn’t funny. Deidara’s eyes had not once left the sculpture since Pain had signaled for his attendance, saying it was of the utmost importance he appeared. One arm yawned out to the sky while the other snaked around and brushed against the meat of the breasts ― your breasts. One leg stuck out before the other, the fat of the thigh attached concealing the womanhood. 

Your womanhood. 

Both futile attempts to afford the piece some decency. Futile, Deidara guessed, was the point. It was coquetry. A shameless attempt at flirtation on your part. 

And just in case Deidara was too dense to get the message, you’d taken it upon yourself to leave him one, attached to the foot of the sculpture’s dais:

Hello! Please deliver to Deidara. Thank you.  

It even had a smiley face after the period.

Deidara balled his fist. 

What. The. Fuck.

“(Y/n) must be an incredibly beautiful woman!” Tobi admired the piece with fascination, a sparkling heart encasing his eyehole. “Look at the face, and the hips, and the feet ― ”

“Tobi!” Deidara was beet red. “Shut the hell up!” 

“Deidara,” Pain spoke again, unfazed by the cacophony. “I’m sure you’ll be undertaking a journey west? Since (Y/n) has clearly requested you specifically.”

Deidara’s eyes yo-yoed between their leader and the monstrosity of the naked sculpture. He debated it. Of course, all while fantasizing about shoving explosives down the laughing fishman’s throat and turning him into a pile of sardines. 

Tobi can taste one himself, while I’m at it.  

“What?” Irritation bit Deidara’s tone. “We’re fucking prostitutes now?” 

Pain raised holographic brows. “If it ensures peace, then yes.”

Deidara’s mouth dropped. The audacity of it all. How much was he expected to take? 

“We’re waiting, Deidara.”

A pause. He was no fool. This wasn’t a request, it was an expectation. 

“Fine,” Deidara sighed irritably. “I’ll go, all right?”

“You better,” Kisame said, at last recovering from his fit. “Better get those high heels out and start walking the streets, too!”

Deidara was ready to draw blood ― 

“No need to be crude, Kisame,” Pain’s backdropped against another fit of raucous laughter. 

Says the man who puts a naked STATUE in the room.

“ Honestly, ” Kakuzu spat. “Do the rest of us have to be here for this?” 

“I second that!” Hidan said with relief, “Finally, something we can agree on. ”

“Of course,” Pain said. “You were here in the event Deidara tried to refuse.”

Deidara ignored them all. He gave the sculpture one more scan before swallowing dry and awaiting the end of the call. He could not believe your gall. You were so … brazen . A simple love letter couldn’t have sufficed? No? A naked ― What the fuck was the matter with you?

Still, he was … intrigued. Curiosity was a hooking finger, beckoning him forth. Was that really … your body? Your lips? Your thighs? Your …

Deidara swallowed dry again, his tongue sticking to the top of his palate.

He’d go to the village and put an end to your games. 

And maybe …

He wouldn’t let himself go there ― even if his treacherous mind was wandering already.

<<<>>>

You sat in your museum of sculptures, head tilted up against the gods you had crafted.

The door creaked open.

“I just received Pain’s crow,” your assistant’s voice rang. “Deidara should arrive in another day or so.” 

Stars were in your eyes but you kept your back to her. “Great!”

Your grand plan relied on whether or not Pain, mysterious leader of the Akatsuki, was morally bankrupt enough to hoe out his members. At any point you could’ve been rejected with your sculpture returned swiftly to you. But it worked. You were thrilled. The first part of the plan had succeeded. 

You were going to see him again.

Your assistant’s footsteps tapped repeatedly over the polish floors upon which you now sat. 

“Hmm.” Doubt deflated some of your enthusiasm. “Do you think it was effective enough? You know, for him?”

Your assistant huffed incredulously. “What? Just because Deidara’s a shinobi means he’s immune to pussy? C’mon. You’re not one of those types that thinks all shinobi are noble and stone-faced, are you, (Y/n)-sama?”

  As if. You guffawed. Nobility wasn’t the issue; hundreds of people scoured the red light districts for carnal game. You told your assistant as such. 

“At least seventy percent are shinobi searching for quick thrills,” You joked. “If my math’s correct, anyway. It could be higher. And I know any one of them would be more than happy if a girl simply threw herself at them without need for reimbursement. But still …” You trailed, gaze tailing down the hardened clay of a kimono-garbed sculpture. “I only wondered. It’s been a long time since … I don’t know how dedicated he is to his little terrorist group, is all. He might not be as amused.”

“You answered your own question, ma’am,” your assistant said. “And even if he wasn’t a shinobi, he’s a man. It’ll go down without a hitch! You worry too much.”

You nodded. She was right: despite the years, you wanted to speak to Deidara in his language. Art. How could he resist such an enticement? How could any man, but especially Deidara, due to the manner in which you had sent your little gift. “Okay. Part one of the plan: Complete!”

“What’s the rest of the plan exactly?” You heard the pat, pat, pat and knew from your many years with your assistant that she was thumping her clipboard against her head. “Dinner? Walk on the beach? Or just … Fucking?”

Your smile was evil. “Yes.” 

You held Deidara in your mind’s palm. Blonde hair, gorgeous face .. . One of the most admired artists in Iwakagure ― no, the most. For  could rival Deidara? Even your knees wobbled in the face of his raw talent, even years later. He was still revered in the art community. Of course, his name grew to possess more notoriety than reverence when he started blowing up things ― and people. But, hey everyone was flawed. 

It was only when he went rogue and abandoned the village did you start your own search for him. Years passed and then … reports of a long-haired, blonde shinobi with profound arsonry acuity. Rogue. Affinity for birds.

Bingo. 

Your giggle was shamelessly girlish. “I’d love to woo him.”

Your assistant chuckled. “Aaand you’re not the slightest bit afraid of him? I mean, with all respect, (Y/n)-sama, he’s a criminal. He’s an arsonist. ” 

You licked your lips. “Love me a bad boy.”

“Right,” she said with a chuckle. “Forget I said anything.” 

“I will. Now, let’s get ready.”

<<<>>>

“We’re going to see the girl with the pretty feet, aren’t we, Senpai?” 

“I told you to shut your mouth, Tobi.” 

Deidara’s taller partner buoyed from foot to foot as he tailed behind. Deidara didn’t want to think about your body ― your incredibly artful body, artful in more ways than one … 

The sun crept from the sky as it vivified the color of peachskin. Deidara’s eyes darted hither-thither, collecting information. It was all he could do to not summon one of his explosive birds and fly over this entire, forgotten village. The urge to set it ablaze and go home was immense. A part of him had wanted to make such an entrance, but prudency would never allow it. 

Nor would Leader.

Deidara turned back to Tobi just in time to see him pose, a hand visoring his visible eye while the other landed on his hip. 

“Leader said the pretty naked lady would have someone waiting for us,” Tobi said. 

“Hm,” Deidara said. It was true; they would wait for someone to escort them to you. Until then, they remained lost in one of the village’s districts. The streets were alive with noise and peopled with busy folk. Deidara could tell the amount of businesses actually open were sparse.  Pain had called you one of their main contributors … She must be a big wig to have people doing her dirty work for her. Just who were you? And how were you so familiar with him to send such a thing to the Akatsuki headquarters? 

And if you were so rich, why did you squalor in the dirt with the likes of those in this village?

Thoughts bubbled in the back of Deidara’s mind― 

“Hey …!” 

Outside of a food stall a woman eyed them, holding a curtain back with manicured nails.

Bingo . 

“Tobi,” Deidara gestured. “C’mon.” 

“Okay, senpai!” 

Deidara neared the food stall.

The woman ticked her head to the side with a smile. “Enjoy your gift?”

Pink colored Deidara’s cheeks.

“So, you’re escorting us, right?”

The woman backed away to admit them into the food stall, where the people inside, dining on bowls of ramen and mackerel were too engrossed in their meals to notice the cloaked men enter. 

“You got me,” she winked. “C’mon.”

The woman led them behind the bar, where they slinked through the backdoor into the alley. 

“Don’t need anyone asking questions about the cloaks,” she reasoned. “Surprised you didn’t think of that, Oh Great Deidara of Iwakagure.”

“Of course I did!” Deidara said. “I look stupid to you?”

“No,” the woman’s eyes roamed on Deidara now. “You look cute . My mistress really didn’t lie …” 

Deidara averted his gaze as the woman snickered. Tobi gawked. 

“Does lady think Tobi’s cute, too?” 

“Uh,” she blinked. “Sure.” 

Tobi twirled with a squeal. Deidara rolled his eyes. 

“Whatever,” Deidara said. “Just take us to meet her, all right?”

“Sure …” the woman said. 

They traveled through as street lights blared to life, the sky a bruising purple as evening descended.

“I only wanted us in there to help us blend in a bit,” she guided them through the streets. “I hope it wasn’t too troublesome getting here.” 

“We can care for ourselves,” Deidara said, prickly. 

“You don’t have to be so defensive,” the woman said. “I’m just making conversation.”

“I said don’t worry about it,” Deidara snapped. “So … who is this woman? This mistress of yours?” 

“I’m one of her many assistants, yeah,” the woman said, leading them down a dark street, made darker by the light of day dying faster. “I started working for her years ago. I was so amazed by her art and so intimidated by her talent, I didn’t think she’d accept me. But, surprise surprise.”

“Yeah? So how she so rich? She sell her art?”

“Exactly! People come from all over the world to see her exhibits. She brings so much tourism to this ragtag village. She doesn’t even keep her wealth to herself; she donates so much. She should be much richer than she is! She’s a saint, really.”

So she donates to the Akatsuki, the deadpan of the thought laid flat in his mind. Deidara was silent, tailing shortly behind her. Some saint.

“You called me Deidara of Iwakagure.”

“ … Yes, I suppose I did.”

“So … Your mistress … she knows where I’m from.”

The woman was silent now as she led Deidara and Tobi down street steps to a quieter street, nearly bereft of people beside the occasional deadbeat smoker. 

“She from there, too?” 

Deidara went unanswered. 

Hm, so I’m on to something, Deidara noticed the buildings growing taller, treeing up as the raucous of the village slipped away. They traveled further south. Maybe Pain’s got this wrong; maybe this girl’s a fucking black widow and wants revenge on me for something. Figures, he’s sure he’s broken a few hearts in the past he’d long since forgotten about. But then … Why would she donate so much money to our organization? She clearly believes in it.

“We’re here,” the woman-assistant said.

Deidara raised his head ― and kept raising it. 

Shit . 

The mansion was immaculate, easily the tallest of all of its sisters. Its main building was flanked by towers with onioned tips and was encased in a giant garden, all of it shielded by a surrounding wall. 

Deidara stared, bug-eyed.

The doors to the gate’s entrance burst open and a gaggle of girls filed through. 

“They’re here ―!” 

“Ooh~! there’s two of ‘em!” 

“Mistress will be so pleased!” 

Girls stood star-eyed at Deidara while more hugged themselves to Tobi’s arms. 

“Tobi likes pretty girls!”

“We’ll entertain the other one,” the woman-assistant said with a wink. “You just follow us.”

The woman-assistant led them in where the cult of girls drove Tobi away laughing and giggling. 

“This way,” the woman said. 

Deidara followed her, looking around. From the inside, the mansion opened up like some grand palace from myth, folkloric and mysterious. Columns shouldered the brunt of a ceiling that raised into the darkness. The floors were illustrated scenes from what Deidara recognized as actual myths. Valiant samurais rescued princesses with flaring kimonos, dragons ribboned down hallways. The scenes on the walls diverged from the ones of nobility beneath them, were lavish with depictions of wild courtesans and … 

Deidara blushed. 

Begrudgingly, he had to admit you did have taste; the art was a lot, but wove together into one cohesive masterpiece. The hallways the assistant led him down were flanked by vases winking with sheen and overflowed with bell flowers, roses, sunflowers. The hallway widened into a foyer. Something winked in Deidara’s peripheral and when he looked upward saw that the ceiling domed into a orb of glass, giving way to the first few blink of stars. 

He had entered the lion’s den for sure.

“ Deidara … ” 

The sirenic voice compelled his head to a foyer alcove where a figure shrouded the threshold. 

His eyes widened. 

(E/c) eyes glittered at him. Long legs supported swaying hips. Elegant cleavage sinking into a familiar mound of breasts. Delicate hands, hickey-worthy neck … 

And lovely ― and lovely … 

Inwardly, he sighed, defeated.

Feet.  

The naked sculpture colored Deidara’s memory. 

“Deidara!” You parroted in awe. Your expression shifted as you came to smolder at him. “In the flesh. And just in time for dinner.”

Your kimono waterfalled as you left the alcove. Deidara gulped, speechless as you sauntered to him.

“It ―” Deidara’s cheeks grew hot. “It really is you …” 

“It really is me …” 

Your woman-assistant's eyes tennis-balled between you and Deidara before bowing respectfully. “I’ll give you two some privacy.” 

She hurried away down a different alcove. 

Deidara shook his head in a desperate attempt to reclaim his senses. Fucking hell, Dei, get a grip.

“So,” he cleared his throat. “I ―”

“I still can’t believe you’re actually here,” You began to turn, “Let me show you ―”

“Wait, I think we should discuss monetary terms first,” Deidara said in a futile attempt to hold some ground over the woman. 

“Hm?” You blinked. “Didn’t your leader explain things to you?”

“What do you mean?”

“The money comes after the evening,” you winked at him. “Of course.” 

Pain, you fucking ― 

“Deidara …” You revered, pulling the sleeve of your kimono back over your shoulder. “Before dinner, I would love for you to see the rest of my work.” 

“Your,” Deidara deadpanned, blinking, “work?”

“Yes,” You smirked at him. “You enjoyed the piece I already had you review, I presume?” 

Deidara fought to keep things on the issue at hand, but his eyes grew preoccupied with the twinkle in yours. The sky above the two of you had plunged into a chief darkness. Candles flared to life to douse the hall in tangerine light. 

Deidara turned a blind eye to it. “Your assistant called me Deidara of Iwakagure.” 

You eyed him. “Did she …?” you said coyly. “I’m glad she didn’t try and call you anything else; she’s got a mouth on her.”

“How do you know me?” 

You shied away. Your head dipped. Deidara tried to ignore the cuteness of it all. 

Focus, damnit.

“I’m guessing you’re from Iwagakure, too?” Deidara pressed. “What are you playing at?” 

You took your time. “Yeah, Deidara, we have a village in common.” You began to walk, crossing the columns to circle him. “Do you remember the underground competitions that used to be held there?” 

“Hm,” Deidara recalled and relished in the ego trip it afforded him. Dark rooms. Rowdy spectators circled around art pieces under makeshift stage lights like cavemen around fire. It was before he left the Iwagakure, when he was still itching to engage in the village’s indie art scene before growing bored of the whole thing. “I won most of them.” 

“I used to show up early and wait for you to showcase your things,” You glazed with memory. “You were always my favorite.” 

Deidara smirked. “Hm, naturally. So you’re, what, some kind of superfan Not like I’m surprised, but …”

You thread past a column to scoop up a candle holder. 

“You could say that,” you said. I have something to show you, if you follow me.”

He obliged, curiosity hooking him with a second finger. Candle flame lit like thin clovers to ward off the darkness. The flames illuminated the sway of your hips as he trailed. The sleeve of your kimono slipped past your shoulder again, revealing the skin of your neck and shoulder pad to him …

Why am I even noticing? 

You brought him to a room hidden behind a set of rectangular doors.

“This is where I keep them.” 

You pushed the doors open with a strength Deidara wouldn’t have expected. 

Deidara entered ― and stopped.

It was a museum of art; animal pieces blazed his vision; exotic birds in flight, elegant cranes, all shaded and hued with masterful care and, if Deidara hadn’t been who he was, he wouldn’t have been able to recognize them as pieces done with clay. There were apricot-colored foxes, a dragon head amongst a dragon bust. Deidara recognized a few self sculptures in the forest of pieces. Obscure structures too abstract to be assigned to names dotted space, esoteric symbols eluding even him …

“You inspired me to create my own art,” You explained as he gawked. You inched to him and brazenly took his hand in yours.

Deidara jumped from the sudden contact and found your pretty face in the dim light. Stop … stop. A part of him wanted to summon a tongue to taste the salt on your palm. 

“It’s how I’ve made my money,” you continued as you tugged him along the aisles of work like an excited child.

“So you’re that kind of fan,” Deidara said as he recovered. And, what do you want from me?” he chuckled in disbelief, “My critique?”

“Of course.” 

He wasn’t expecting an honest answer forthright. Sincerely, he roved eyes over your work. 

“Hm, well …” he approached one, taking inventory of it head to foot. “Give me the candle.”

You obeyed.

“You’ve got a great understanding of color, I’ll give you that,” Deidara examined. “Painting can be messy, especially on clay ― and honestly so many artists use colors so … bluntly; it makes the whole thing come off as garish.”

“I’ve noticed.”

He laughed at that. “Hm! … You’ve got a great eye. And I don’t hand out compliments easily.” He raised the candle to illuminate another sculpture. “How long did this one take you?” 

“Five weeks,” You answered before chuckling somewhere behind him. “It’s funny, I sketched and re-sketched this one so many times, it was technically seven weeks.”

“A perfectionist. I like that.” 

Deidara found himself smiling. Rarely did he get to talk to someone about art or its many processes. Deidara thought of Sasori and was touched with a tinge of respect for his fallen partner. But, of course, they’re philosophies so often chafed against one another. But you … An image of him helping you craft one of your pieces came to his mind: his hands guiding yours over unsophisticated clay, paint dashing your collarbone, maybe on your lips … 

“Deidara …?”

Your voice brought him out of his thoughts, only for him to realize you were now in front of him. 

“We could talk about this more over dinner.” 

Your hands grazed his forearms and for some reason he didn’t pull away. The alluring scent of your perfume flirted up his nose. 

Deidara’s cock twitched; he kicked himself inwardly. What was he? A fucking teenage boy? He had half of a mind to shove you away, end this … whatever this was.

But none of that happened. Instead, he agreed. And, taking his hand again with fingers threaded through his, you led him out of your museum. 

<<<>>>

You let him to the roof of one of your buildings, where moonlight bestowed diamonds over the still waters of your pool and the dinner table waited, illuminated by more candles. 

“You’re a real hot shot now, aren’t you?” Deidara said.

You blushed as he surveyed dinner. “Is it too much?” 

“Nah, if anything it’s just the artist in you dying to come out,” he shrugged. “I respect that.”

You moved to take a seat, Deidara following you. He stopped you, pulling out the chair for you. 

You sank to your chair with a mixture of surprise and thrill. “What a gentleman. ”

“Just showing my respect, is all.” 

You snapped your fingers and two waiters appeared to kneel before you, plates of food in hand. 

Deidara did a double-take. “Wow.”

The waiters displayed the food and took their leave. His favorite: bakudan.

“You think of everything, don’t you?” Deidara said.

“Yeah.”

“Hm …” he could not pretend as though he was not impressed, but he could try as he took his seat.

He remembered the art shows in Iwagakure. You were always there? Did he ever see you? Even if he had, you would’ve been little more than a nobody to him, another sycophant he rightfully deserved amongst a herd of fawns and nothing more. You’re telling me all that time … I had a groupie groupie?

“Hey,” he said. “Remember when you said you used to attend my showcases.”

You lowered your fork to raise your brows. “I remember ten minutes ago, yeah.”

Deidara’s own brow twitched. Cheeky cunt . Then kicked himself; he didn’t want to think about your cunt. He watched your tongue swipe your plump lower lip ― then kicked himself again. 

“Why didn’t you ever try to talk to me?” Deidara asked. “I mean,” he leaned back in his chair, dangling his fork, “not like I needed any encouragement, even back then, but what gives? If you were such a fan ―”

“I was shy, back then …” You said. You toyed with your food. You had turned bashful, like a schoolgirl. “Still am, to be honest.”

He scoffed. “Hm! Says the woman who sends naked sculptures of herself to people.” 

You waved your fork. “What can I say? You bring out the wild girl in me,” The glint in your eye turned seductive. “Always have …”

Deidara gulped. What did that mean? You play with yourself with me in mind? Is that it?

Thinking that was another mistake;  images of you sieved into his mind. Sweet, feminine hands sinking in between the softness of your thighs, fingers grazing your wet lips to ... 

What did you smell like? Did you smell as good there as you did everywhere else? 

He shook his head. Fuck . 

“So you’re telling me,” Deidara said just to say something, “you have absolutely no issue with what I do.” 

“I don’t know,” You coquetted. “What do you do?”

“Don’t play coy . You contacted Akatsuki. You know damn well what I mean.” 

You were silent. 

“Killing people,” Deidara said. “Blowing them to smithereens. Kidnapping. The gods know what else. You’re cool with all that?”

Your manicured hand wrapped around your wine glass. You raised it, but before bringing it to your lips: 

“Birds of a feather.” 

You drank. 

What? 

“Come again?” 

You smacked your lips. “You’re not the only one who’s killed a few.” 

A pause. You set aside your drink before challenging his gaze. 

“Care to elaborate?” he asked. 

“I had an assistant once,” you began. “She told me she was desperate for a job, but you wouldn’t know by the run of her mouth. She complained, took off without warning. But then it turned out she had sticky fingers; she tried to steal one of my pieces. I’d had enough.” You leaned over the table as though you feared Deidara wouldn’t hear. “So I killed her. Used her for my piece after the last.”

“And,” Deidara swallowed, “your current girl …”

“You’ve already met her,” you said. “She’s mouthy, too ― but not to me.” 

You had killed, not only that ― encased a girl inside your work. She had wanted your art, and she had gotten her wish. 

“That’s …” Deidara trailed. “... Amazing.”

You smiled. “So, you see, I have no problem with what you do. Who am I to judge, am I right?” 

“Do the villagers judge you?”

“This village has seen enough strife for a lifetime,” You said. “I don’t think they’d mind learning about indiscretion ― especially if they knew why I killed her.”

Deidara raised an eyebrow. “So you donate bundles of cash to clear your conscience?”

“My conscience is clear,” You said. “People shouldn’t have to suffer any more than they already do. I want this village to prospect. I donate because I want to.” You popped a piece of food into your mouth. “You never answered me, by the way.”

“About what?” 

“The sculpture,” Your eyes narrowed with coquetry again, a glint especially bright and beautiful in your eye with aid from the moonlight. “Did you like it?” 

Deidara’s heart beat especially loud in his ears ― and this time he didn’t kick himself for it. 

“... Yeah,” he relented. “Yeah, I liked it.” 

“And it’s been a long time since I’ve seen any of your work, Deidara,” You raised to leave your seat. “Why don’t you show me something?” 

Deidara’s eyes widened. Far was he ever from an opportunity to flex his brilliance, especially on someone so appreciative ― so 

deserving. 

“Sure!”

Enthusiasm straightened your shoulders. “Really? I mean, If you need ―”

“I don’t need anything,” he said, waving you away. “Just stand back!” 

You obeyed, eyes bright from the contagion of his excitement. So aptly memorized did he have the hand signs, Deidara didn’t care to glance at them. Instead, he watched you try to futilely follow his movements. 

<<<>>>

Clay spilled like milk from mouths on Deidara’s hands to form into creatures before your eyes ― you blinked furiously and each time you did another creature was born; small dragons, spherical creatures with eyes, birds, and one, growing piece of clay, raising meters above the ground. It looked like a snowman to you but, knowing Deidara, it was leagues more dangerous. 

You stepped back, overwhelmed by the breadth of Deidara’s creation, Deidara’s artistry . 

One of Deidara’s clay birds flapped its wings, swerved in the air and landed gracefully on the cliff of your shoulder. 

“So,” Deidara’s smirk brightened his face and sent a throb to your nether regions, “what do you think?” 

What do I think? You pet the bird’s clay-made wing. What do I think?  

You took a step. The roof crowded with his creatures to dab white ivory among the encroaching night. 

Surely, it helped being a ninja; Deidara possessed powers you could only dream of understanding. Still. Your mouth hung agape at the amount of things he could spring alive from the literal palms of his hand. Your eyes followed up at his bigger piece, more of a monument to you than a mound of clay. 

He’s a god. A god among men. A god of art.

“Hm!” 

Poof.

You startled. Some of the pieces began disappearing. They left the roof choking with smoke until only his large, snowman-like piece remained. 

“I see you’ve been stunned into silence by my art,” Deidara said. 

You didn’t reply, only began to step forward. 

“Hm!” Deidara looked away, crossed his arms. “It’s only natural, after all, to have your breath taken away by my artiste.” 

Another step. Another. 

“I’m sure our leader didn’t even tell you what I’m capable of.”

Another. 

“It’s a good thing, too ―” 

You were running now. 

“It would’ve spoiled the surprise ―” 

You pounced on Deidara. He cried out but you barely heard it as the force propelled you both backward, falling hard and fast into the swimming pool. 

<<<>>>

Bubbles spilled from Deidara’s mouth. He could feel your hands on him, somewhere, everywhere ― 

He looked to the surface of the water and swam toward it. He could not feel your hands anymore.

He came up for air, looking around for you. 

“(Y/n)!” 

Then you emerged ― but he had no time to register it as your arms came around him. You pulled him down toward you, your lips crashing into his in a wet kiss. 

“Mm …!” 

Your tongue ran over the hard shell of his palate. Your hands held his cheeks. Your legs hooked around his waist to trap him between your thighs.

“That was ― mm ― the most ― mm ― amazing thing I’ve ever ― mm! ― seen!”

Deidara’s hands found you ― and immediately met skin; your kimono, having not been able to withstand the pull of the water, slid dangerously past your shoulders, the folds opened wide so he could feel the full cushion of your breasts against him. 

Oh, fuck.

Just as he began to play with your tongue, you broke away.

You faced him with heavy-lidded eyes, drops of water falling from your abused lips. 

“Let me make good on my promises to Pain,” Your hands hooked behind his neck. 

“Wha ― what?”

“Fuck me, Deidara,” Your voice was thick with lust. “I told him the quantity of my donation was completely dependent on how hard you fucked me. It would be an honor to be fucked by such an amazing artist!” 

That sent something to his dick. 

The surprise dissipated. He smirked. “Really …? Is that so …” 

He gripped your throat and hoisted you above him. He heard you gasp and tightened his grip, feeling the twitch of his cock in response to the  victimized sound. 

“Beg for it,” he ordered.

“ Oh … ” You whimpered. Your head fell back as Deidara’s hand served as a brace. 

He reached downward and tugged at the wet bow of your kimono. He yanked it and reveled in it coming apart to reveal the rest of you.

“ Beg. For me .”

Everything you did and had done was a plea for him, he admitted, but the idea of you begging vocally made him painfully hard. His eyes drank in your naked form still half submerged in the water. Wet tits in his face. A droplet of water fell away from a nipple. 

“Please …” came your breathless voice. “Please, fuck me ― oh … ” 

He thumbed at the tempting nipple, pert and so responsive to his touch. 

“ Nothing underneath, ” he feigned chastisement, pinching the nipple between his fingers. “Fucking slut .” 

He tightened his grip twofold and was pleasantly surprised with the moan you rewarded him with. The strict fit of his pants was becoming too much to bear. You jerked in his hold, tits jiggling in his face. 

“ Please, fuck me, Deidara!” 

Satisfied, He set you down and watched you bounce in the water before yanking you forward. He pressed his mouth against yours once again. You reached for him to no avail; he spun you, your back now pressed hard against the side of the pool. He released your mouth to dabble kisses at your neck, biting at pieces of skin. 

“ Fuck …!” You arched and Deidara fell into the dip of your curve.

You gripped his hand to bring it to your face. He stopped kissing you to look at what you had in mind, his tongue still present at his palm. 

Your lips traced his palm and began to kiss the tongue there. 

“Mmm …”

Deidara laughed as you tongue-kissed his hand. “You really are a fucking weirdo, aren’t you?”

The tongue slithered over your own. You released a moan and closed your mouth over the tongue, a flushed red tainting your cheeks. Your hand pressed behind the back of his hand, forcing it to deepen the kiss, to nibble at his tongue. Deidara hitched a breath. You sucked it further into your mouth. 

“ Ah ― y … you wanna suck on something so badly …” Deidara murmured. “MaybeI should give you something more legit, hm …”

You mewled in approval. His tongue retreated from your mouth and he felt a twinge of triumph when you gasped for air. He approached you. A hand ghosted over your neck before ramming you hard against the wall of the pool, the force with which he’d done it so hard he was sure its cement edge imprinted on your upper back. With his other hand he tugged his trousers down. 

You met his eyes.

“Take a deep breath.” 

And he plunged you into the water.

He looked down, watched the water dance as your squiggly reflection gripped his cock and fit it into your mouth. 

Deidara groaned. His head fell back as you hollowed your cheeks and took him in. The water did nothing to stall your mouth; you bobbed your head, stroking what couldn’t fit into your mouth. 

Deidara steadied himself with a hand at the pool’s edge, entranced by how your tongue rolled back to lick his head each time you pulled away, only to take him deep into the back of your throat when pulling in ― 

“ Nargh …! ” 

A hand palmed at his balls while another tightened around his cock. Deidara reached for your head in the water to thread fingers into your head and force you harder onto his cock. 

“ Aah … shit! ” He wanted you to choke on it. He wanted to own your mouth. 

And apparently you wanted that, too; you popped him from your mouth a few times. You hadn’t come up for air once since he’d submerged you, his cock now your only business. He yanked your head up. He forced a kiss, the taste of himself in your mouth driving him mad.

“Enjoying dinner, I see, hm, hah …” he quipped, eyes heavy on your hand still stroking his cock. “What a pro. ” 

“Only for you, Deidara-senpai. ”

You hand abandoned his cock and you licked him off your palm. Without his help you went under, fitting his cock in your mouth a second time. Deidara kept your hair from your mouth as you sucked him. His cockhead hit the back of your throat and, oh , you didn’t choke, only took more, more. Greedy cunt. 

He imagined you practicing this for him, only for him, your senpai. Your mouth hungering for what wasn’t truly there. Deidara squeezed eyes shut; close, close. You were sucking his cock as though his was the only one in the world, worshiping with your mouth and tongue. He imagined your lungs desperate for air, screaming for them, yet your mouth too transfixed to care. 

A fucking servant for him, obedient to his cock. 

Deidara’s cock twitched. His groan was low and rumbling as he spilled his seed into your willing mouth. You sucked hard, jerked him into your mouth. Your mouth slicked with his cum and grew impossibly warm. Saliva and his own seed coated his cock. 

“Aaah-ha- ahh …! ” 

He scalped you as he emptied into your mouth, cum guzzling down your throat.

At last, you popped him from your mouth and emerged before him, mouth and lips thoroughly abused.

Deidara’s gaze cast down on you. He caught his breath in the seconds absent of words. 

“I could use a girl like you,” Deidara exhaled. 

You popped your lips, eyes dreamy and narrow. “I think you just did,”

“Hm! An apprenticeship, then?”

You recovered immediately. “It’s all I’ve ever wanted.” 

He smirked at his own prospect and pulled you to him. “C’mere.”

He emerged from the pool before helping you follow suit. He removed his black fishnet shirt and flung it away. He drank you in. Naked, in the flesh ― and wet, right when he thought you couldn’t be improved upon.

You settled atop the dinner table and waited for him. Deidara came to you.

“Spread those legs.” 

 You acquiesced. He licked his lips at the sight of your puffy, glistening cunt.

“You wouldn’t be my first,” You said, “but you’ll be my last.”

He slotted into the space you afforded him. He caressed your vulva before giving it a firm slap. You yelped and his lip upturned at the sound. He slid a finger between your folds, encouraged by your appreciative mewls. 

He gripped the fat of your cheeks and forced you to look at him and not his adventurous fingers. 

“Your best. ” 

You hooked your legs behind him as he geared his cock grazed your folds ― 

And thought he might cum just from the sound of your drawn out moan when he slid inside you. 

He bucked from instinct, the firm grip of your twat clouding his senses. Again he went for your throat, the appendage becoming its permanent resting place. 

“This is what you wanted, right?” Deidara breathed out, thrusting hard. “Leader’s gonna get his fucking money’s worth …” 

Hands gripped his wrists tight as he began to fuck you, the table wobbling slightly underneath your mewling body. 

“Yes …! Ye―Yes, oh!” You clung to him, Deidara’s hands upholding you. “ Fuc ― oh, Yes! I owe Pain my life ― oh! ” 

He released your throat just to bite at it. He sunk his teeth into your skin while his hands committed to making scarlet red prints against your ass.

“ Fuck, you’re ―” Deidara stammered. The feel of your cunt swallowing him was too much. He recalled Kisame’s threat to fuck you himself. Not on your life, sharkman . And he felt himself thrust hard just to affirm you were his. He’d set the entire world ablaze before anyone else could experience the wonderful grip of your cunt. “You’re mine. ”

You tugged him to your lips again and kissed him. A moan from you vibrated against his lips. He reached downward to tease your clit and your legs trembled at his sides.

“ Fuck, Deida ―” You flung your head back. “ I’m ― ”

He knocked you onto the table and lifted your legs over his shoulders. He began to pound you, relishing in the bounce of your tits. Plates fell to the floor and shattered as he wrecked your cunt. 

He choked you again, sure there would be a greater hand-shaped bruise once he was through. He flicked your clit, thumbed it. Your scream rumbled under his grip as his balls slapped your ass. 

Your moans grew shrill, and you clenched ―

“ Fuck …! ” Deidara lost himself in your tight cunt. He slapped your clit, grip dangerously tight at your neck―

“Yes, please!” You called out as you came, “Dei― Deidara!”

Spurts of cum left his cock and sucked into your cunt. You convulsed and convulsed. You showed him the whites of your eyes as you came. Deidara held you to him by your thighs. A few more weak thrusts and he gave out on top of you, his chin hiding in the crook of your shoulder.

A few moments passed. Deidara raised his head, caught you over the corner of his eye. “So … everything you wanted?”

“And more, ” You sang.

He maneuvered to place a kiss at the heart of your collarbone, still so fascinated with it. He removed himself from you before assisting you as best as he could. 

“Did you mean it?” You inquired after a few moments more.

“Hm?” 

“About me being your apprentice?” 

“... Hm,” Deidara shrugged. “Well, I’ll have to check my schedule. But, if it all adds up, I wouldn’t mind having you by my side.” 

You squealed, engulfed him in a hug. 

“Ah, ah!” Deidara fought you off. “Okay, okay, whatever!”

“Oh, I’m so excited! ” You bounced. “So, so ― wait!” 

You pulled back, smirked up at him.

“I almost forgot,” You said. “Your payment … ”

<<<>>>

“Two million yen,” Pain said. “All in a single donation ― our highest to date. I assume it went well?” 

“Hm!” Deidara said. “Very!”

“And Miss (Y/n) tells me she’ll be requesting you monthly from now on,” Pain continued. “Each time with the same donation or higher.” 

“Are you telling me Deidara’s dick is going to fund all our expeditions from now on?” Kisame mocked. 

“And the rest of our lives,” Kakuzu’s voice tipped in interest, “if this goes on …”

“Don’t get any ideas, Kakuzu!” Hidan barked. “We’re not whoring ourselves out.”

“Shut up,” Kakuzu bit back. “I’ve never even thought about it. Unless …”

“What girl would wanna fuck you? ” 

“A satisfied and wealthy client means less worry over how we secure our money,” Pain said, ignoring the bickering, “so, in a manner of speaking, yes. Deidara will aid in contributions― as we all should.” 

“Well, then, we’re all set!” Deidara said. 

“There’s just one thing that irks me about this whole endeavor,” Pain said. “... Where is Tobi?” 

“...”

“... He didn’t come back with you, did he?” 

“... No.”

“...” 

Pain sighed.

“... Go back and get him, Deidara.”

[my-darling-boy]

Have you had any ✨Ghost Experiences✨ in Scotland yet? Meet any new ghosts???

Ohhhh plenty, but far too many to list without going off on a ramble haha

We’ve done many overnights in castles and old buildings up and down the UK with a team of investigators which has led to really neat experiences, some of them absolutely poignant. I think my favourite interaction has been with a sweetheart of a young seaman called William aboard the RRS Discovery docked in Dundee, also the best K2 session I’ve ever had was there. But yeah, various castles, historic buildings, manors, prisons, etc with some really fascinating results.

I do like how it’s also putting the mediumship to the test which is something I still don’t really like bringing up in general to people but I have apparently shocked investigators/employees at these places with describing events, people, and other things with detail that is not even public or only known privately by people who frequent that location. Nearly all locations I’ve never been to and make a point not to read up on them before I go, which makes these instances more compelling? I often don’t even know the significance of what I’m (sheepishly) describing only to be told I just described a specific thing that happened in a room when there’s no way I could know about said thing. One of the best instances of this was on the RRS Discovery when trailing behind the group in the lower decks, I stopped suddenly. It felt as though something SMACKED very hard and very sudden right where I was standing, someone had lost their life in this very spot. I thought with the boilers around perhaps someone had been hit somehow and died or maybe fallen from the above platform and hit their head on the metal below but was told there were no known records of someone dying in that room and that the platforms didn’t exist at the time. I was perplexed by this as I was 100% sure something had happened there but I just ignored it, maybe I was wrong. We get up to the top deck finally and are told about a boy who, in 1901, tragically fell from the crows nest and died. The investigator and I suddenly realised I had been standing directly below the spot he would have hit on the upper deck when he fell. Another would be a nice young man I’d encountered at a private castle who seemed to be wearing some sort of chainmail and white tunic, followed me around for most of the night, and at one point I picked up on a story about a strange looking gold disc with all these markings on it on the alter in the chapel which he immediately told me not to ask about and refused to elaborate more, I had no idea why he was so adamant about this. I later learned after enquiry the castle historians have documented the place being used by the Templars and it’s a private fact at this location that the Templars have buried artefacts beneath the castle they are working to recover… most notably, beneath the chapel. I’d be talking for ages if I described the other occurrences, but that’s one I’ll always remember!

All and all, I do actually recommend doing it, even if you don’t believe in the stuff, because you get entire historic locations basically all to yourself, at night, which is cooler. I once sat for nearly an hour in a 200 year old jail on the floor, in the dark, at 2 AM, just chilling. On free roam while everyone is usually at base, I’ve been able to explore places by myself, in the dark, opening doors to rooms not even shown to us, panning my torch to old paintings and artefacts in basements to attics and bedrooms and so much more. I’ve sat alone in century old ships and played sea shanties which echoed hauntingly down the passageways. Sprawled out in the pews of medieval chapels in the pitch dark, wandered dark castle corridors alone, sometimes I’ll sing out old songs and just listen to it drift out through the halls and rooms. You feel like some character in a novel, it’s quite a liminal space! Like all these places where so many other people came before you, where people lived and died, sometimes even right where you’re sitting, and you’re able to lay out on the stones in the dark with it all and just feel connected to it yk?

Anyway that still ended up being a ramble HAHA so yeah! I recommend it for both believers and those less inclined because at the end of the day, you’ve basically got several hours of private access to historical locations, at night, no tourists, and sometimes to places the public isn’t allowed at all, and hey maybe something Strange will happen while you’re alone in the darkness.

[youremyheaven]

U GUYYYSSS storytime:

So I got talking to a guy a little while ago and we vibed realllyyy well. He's lowkey the textbook definition of everything I'm looking for in a guy. He's 6'2, well to do (not rich but does veryyyy well for himself), BULKY BROAD SHOULDERED, Venusian etc

The synastry of our charts is insane 🥵 He had Mercury atmakaraka (remember my Mercury DK?? 😌)

He has a Venus Moon and stellium and he's the most Venusian guy I've ever met,,, he LOVES beauty, art, the female form etc and appreciates it. The way he spoke about it was so hot to me ngl,,, mf was so poetic,, he really knew how to speak sensually without ever being creepy or vulgar

His Mercury AK was in Purvabhadrapada and he had a puppy like softie Jupiter guy personality. I loved the fact that he looked like a WWE boxer (bulky af 🥵) but had the personality of a golden retriever. LITERALLY ALL MY DREAMS seemed to be coming true.

I knew his birthday but not his rising sign. Yk what they say about "if something's too good to be true, then it is" ??? yeah, i just couldn't brush off the feeling that something wasn't right. But I couldn't straightaway ask for his birth time, esp since he's Hindu and will know what's up 🤭😂 ANYWAAAYYYS we're talking and everything and this man is love bombing me HARD and I know it because:

a) I'm a retired love bomber myself

b) This is not my first rodeo

and anyways this 🧔🏻 is talking marriage and babies, he's calling me wifey 😭 (kinda cringe bc he's known me for dayyys but good lord handsome men can get away with anything 😤) and he refers to himself as "husband" 😭😭😭 like "husband's proud of you" and "your husband doesn't want you to apologise" 😭 (ew but he's hot 👉🏻👈🏻) and I let myself have my delulu moment and try to give him the benefit of the doubt bc literally he checks every box 🥹and he's soooo completely fond of me. We used to run in the same circles like 10yrs ago, even though I had no idea who he was and never interacted with him then, he told me that he remembered me from back then and thought I was cute 🥺 and later I took a looooong break from social media and he told me he'd wondered where I was all those years 🥹🥹and then I apparently showed up in his "suggested for you" on IG a few months ago and he instantly recognised me and followed me etc 🥺🥹 he's been tryna hmu for monthsssss now but I was with my ex 🤡and then I was recovering from my ex 🤧 so I didn't pay much attention to it. When he told me all this, it kinda made me melt 🫠 how he kept trying to talk to me even though I repeatedly ignored him etc

And he did everything right. I could text him rn and he'd reply in 5 seconds. He always asked me how I was, remembered things, always sent me like 20 different messages until I replied, showered me in compliments (Venusian men love to pour you with their attention, it can even be annoying lmfao) etc like there was nothing in his behaviour, his tone or his words that was giving me 🚩 he genuinely seemed sweet, caring etc and he loved babies 😩 and sent me videos with his nieces and nephews (man's was manipulator pro max) but YK ME 🤪 when I have a gut feeling ☝🏻 I can't ignore it 🤓 so I was very much waiting for the ball to drop and watch him fuck up somehow 💀 initially I felt sooo overwhelmed by all his love (bombing) that I felt like the bad guy for not reciprocating it or feeling that kind of "love at first sight" thing 🤡 BUT

one day he said "I can't believe I found you after 10 years, that means no matter where you are after another 10 yrs, I'll find you then as well" and I was like 🤨 I thought you wanted to marry me and make me your trophy wife 🧐 huh 👀 and he was all 😂😍haha yes ofc I'm just joking bbg 😍😂 but I knew there was more to it

Finally I got his birth time AND GUESS WHAT???

He's Hasta Rising 💀💀💀💀

Idk if you know already but I don't like Lunar men 🤡 and the minute I found out, I was SCREAMING bc 😭 why would God play me like that???? Put the most perfect guy, astrologically and otherwise, in front of me, I literally have him wrapped around my pinky and HE'S A LUNAR??? why God why 😭

But him & I had come too far for me to dump his ass for no reason 😬 (can't tell him it's bc the sus vibes I got from him was further bolstered by him being Lunar 🤭) so I was praying to God to give me an opportunity where he fucks up so that I can walk away 🚶🏻‍♀️from this situation before things get out of hand

AND GOD DELIVERED 😩

I was texting him the other day and he spoke about how he wants to spend as much time with me as he can before we go out to chase our dreams (move away from this city basically) and I was like 🤨so you're looking for a short term relationship?? And he was like 🥺 no never and I was like why tf would you say you want to marry me and have babies (1 boy and twin daughters 😭🤡💀) if you already know you cannot commit???? And he was like "because we could meet again in a few years and it would be nice to have this plan ready" 💀💀💀💀 HE ACTUALLY SAID THAT AKSKKSJSJDIID brother thinks my IQ is in the negatives bc WTF sort of explanation is that 😭 and i told him "this manipulation might work elsewhere but not on me, good luck tho, bye, I'm done here 💅🏻" and he went 180 and said "I'm so sorry, I was just trying to be funny, please give me another chance, all I meant is that we never know how things go so we can try to work things out but there's no guarantee, please I'm so sorry" 😂😂 and he called me like 3 times and finally said "Can we atleast still be friends? i can't lose you like this" AJSJJSJSJ THE AUDACITY 🤡💀🤡💀

but I just want to say thank you God for showing me his true colours and for giving me the opportunity to exit with grace and dignity and making him feel like a fool 😌✨

[femsolid]

There was a talk show on french TV the other day about trans parents and their children. One of the guests was a butch lesbian truck driver and her daughter. The show's host asked the daughter if there were any telltale sign that her mother was a man and the daughter said that her mom ("dad" she called her) had interests and hobbies that were traditionnaly associated with men. I still can't believe I have to hear this shit in 2023. The mother said that she just couldn't bear the thought of being a "masculine woman". She just could NOT be a masculine woman. No way. Being a butch lesbian was unacceptable to her. Therefore she had to be a man. She said she had nothing against masculine women, that she even fell in love with one, it just couldn't be her. But sitting there on the couch... she was exactly that. She was not feminine, she was not a man either, she was a butch lesbian. She just had to pretend (and make everyone pretend with her) that she was a straight man for her to be okay with who she was. And that was pretty sad. Because in the end it means she still isn't okay with who she is. An interesting thing she said was that she only started thinking of transitioning after she heard some french idiots use the word "queer" and she looked it up on the internet and discovered all the propaganda associated and then here she was, boom, a man. An online epiphany. I'm happy she found a way to let go of the pressure of femininity and hope she's happier this way, but the thought process behind it is so incredibly regressive, sexist and homophobic it's hard to stomach.

There was also a transbro invited with his daughter. She said that she and her little brother found out about their dad by discovering his secret instagram account on which he was pretending to be a woman. She also explained that since he had started his transition he was making his children's life a living hell at home. She justified and excused it by claiming he was going through female puberty. The father nodded with a big smile on his face. Haha cute and amusing. Apparently, his doctor told him that the hormones he's taking are turning him into a teenage girl. And teenage girls are annoying, emotional and irrational of course, we all know that, so voilà. The daughter of another transbro said the same thing, that her dad was going through his teenage girl phase and was therefore crying and screaming for no reason. The show's psychologist suprisingly intervened to say it had nothing to do with being female and everything to do with the artifical hormones intake causing mood swings. I would argue that narcissism and misogyny are at play as well.

Another interesting part was when they discussed the fact that trans identified parents have often fantasized about being a member of the opposite sex for a long time but their family on the other hand typically had no idea and is shocked when they discover it. The trans identifying person rushes everything because in their perception they've been waiting for a long time. So they're like: now you know! So pretend with me and be okay with it! But to the family it's completely sudden, so to be asked to forget about the person they know, stop using their name, be an unwilling witness to their sexual changes and be just fine with it is... an impossible task.

And on the topic of sexual changes there were discussions, initiated by the psychologist, about how disturbing it is for the children to become involved in their parents' sex lives. Because through talks of phalloplasties, vaginoplasties, estrogen to induce breast growth, etc, the parents are indeed making the children a part of their sex lives and all the (now adult) daughters agreed that it was uncomfortable to say the least. Like when your dad is recovering from turning his penis into a hole or getting fake breasts you're forced to become aware and part of it. It was interesting that only daughters were present as well. Of course all of them, no matter how uncomfortable, said we should support transitioning and that was the conclusion of the show. I didn't listen to everything because I was working at the same time but. Yeah. All in all, the usual.

[georg-prime]

On Agatha All Along eps 8-9

I'm feel about the same as @p-taryn-dactyl's answer and @ennn in this post.

But yeah I'm really disappointed that we didn't have a full Agatha backstory. Nothing about why her mother was so bent on thinking she was evil from birth, nor anything about her and Rio's beginnings. I do appreciate they took the time to show us her life with her son, to really show how desperate she was to keep him alive and how she just embraced the killings right after her double heartbreak (losing her son that way, Rio taking him while she was asleep etc). But then it took time from other things. So I hope there's still a possibility we learn more things about her while a chatty ghost but we'll, this was supposed to be her show first, next time we see her it probably won't be centered on her.

Also not really happy about is how they really went there with Billy having created the Road. Not only I fear the fighting between fans now (I sure as hell wish one day I could be in a fandom were people wouldn't be aweful to each other or to actors/crew members etc, like wishing death on people wth!!? or even on beloved characters that's just mean), but also it means that they used this opportunity of introducing him by already kind of giving him the guilt and trauma from the Mother arc in Young Avengers 2. So that means they did this, taking it away from being a YA story, and either never having him do that again and so not really exploring the full "reality bending powers so huge they can alter the world and he isn't controlling them yet but his friends and love are here with him and he is the Demiurge" story, or they would make him do that again in some other story and I think that would be worse... Nobody would need such a plot a third time after this and Wandavision. I understand, "parallels" and all, but no 3rd.

Not much infos about Death too, I was hoping for at least some answers to my questions here. There will be other occasions (but I don't have much hope on this front, I fear other writers would more likely just make her a joke character, to just be there looking sexy and weird, flirting with some dude, without much depth 🤔).

Then Alice.

I can appreciate the bitter sweet realization that she did indeed fulfill her purpose at least once. But ugh, a white woman who already lived very very long, and it was a very long psychopathic life, got saved then while the Asian quite young for a witch and very kind person, who barely got her chance at a good life freed from her curse, dies protecting her? Not a good look for this show. I do enjoy seeing Agatha being the equivalent of a pirate, just enjoying life doing crimes, free in a patriarchal world, but not at this kind of cost and without real consequences (she'll get a chance at life back surely).

I'm just glad that at least Jen got a second chance. After having suffered for a whole century as a Black woman, so not exactly having much rights for a big part of it (they didn't think this through when they cast her I bet, it should have been at least mentioned), alone and with nothing to her name, because of said white woman - I was worried they also go there and it would be part of the 'haha it was Agatha all along " thing, but hoped they won't... anyway that also sting man.

I guess I'm also disappointed about the lack of answer to Billy's question if he is Billy or William, and no apparently recovering much memories, but I'm guessing they might tell that story an other time. Maybe.

Basically I did like this show, it had a lot of good things, awesome visuals and costumes, good directing & cinematography, great cast, interesting characters. But it is super disturbing to me how writers don't seem to understand they can't just kill a bunch of characters they made the viewers love, so easily/quickly/kind of cheaply. The only death here who is really acceptable imo was Lilia's, it was indeed the choice of a long lived person who saved several people in doing so and will have several long lasting effects (getting Agatha rid of the Salem Seven, giving advice and his book to Billy, having Jen trust and care for other witches again). Sharon being played for laughs is now in fact a serious guilty memory to Billy, even though it's an accident in this situation in his part and very much Agatha's fault (she brought the 'civilian' there, what was she going to do to her anyway after killing the other 3 like she was originally planning, just let her go? I somehow doubt it 😅), and while he already feels guilty about how he and Tommy are still alive, plus the whole Alice's case, that's kind of cruel frankly.

Anyway, I'm still going to hope that Secret Wars will bring us Alice from an alternate reality, that they don't screw up the Young Avengers too much, and that the lessons about optimizing a show/movie's budget with good practical effects and art and time, will be learned.Next generation of writers please be less homicidal with the characters. Keep the open mindedness of this generation when it comes to queer stories and the concept of intricate plots of the 2000-2010's dark area, add the low stakes fun adventures of the previous generations, and let's try and be more mindful of the racism, I see this gen is trying but they don't get it yet clearly.We'll get there 🤞

[clothyume]

Epilogue

Shu: Kiryu! Are you alright enough to move? 

Kuro: I’ve been laid down for nearly an hour. I’ve recovered enough to walk

More importantly, what’s that? Why are you trying to ride a bike?

Shu: Oh, this? Well, though  your travel sickness is severe, you’re better on bicycles than in cars, right?

Since it’s an emergency, we’ll ride this back to ES. Alright, get on the back 

Kuro: Wait a sec. I’m confused…

Why a bike? You didn’t steal it, did you? 

Shu: I beg your pardon. I’d never do something so unethical! 

I was given permission by this bicycle’s owner, and they handed it over to me

Kuro: They just handed it over…!?

Shu: Fortunately I met a young man on a bicycle who lived in a nearby village. He gave me this bicycle  

Kuro: You sound like a tsukkomi. More like, I’m curious why he gave it to you. And he gave you a helmet

Shu: It seems he bought a new bicycle recently. Apparently he was having a farewell ride today

He said it felt like fate that he happened to meet me who was looking for a bicycle on that day. The helmet was just a freebie

Kuro: What a coincidence…

Shu: Perhaps you should say that reality is stranger than fiction. Now, hurry

Kuro: Well, you told me to get on the back. But you can’t ride a bike in the first place, can you?  

Shu: Th-That was when I was in elementary school. Now I can read a bike with ease

Kuro: …Then can I see you ride it? I’ll believe it when I see it 

Shu: Of course. Behold, Kiryu. I can already ride a bicycle skillfully…

Eek!?

Kuro: Oop, be careful. Look, say no more

Shu: …I just happened to hit a small pebble 

Kuro: Don’t be pretentious. So neither of us can ride a bike after all? 

Shu: …

Kuro: Thanks for caring about me, but you’re worrying too much. Don’t overwork yourself, Itsuki 

Shu: …I’m not satisfied with that comment

Kuro: Ah? What are you not satisfied with? 

Shu: “You’re worrying too much”, speak for yourself 

Kuro: What’s that supposed to mean… Hey! Don’t force me to wear a helmet 

Shu: —It’s you who’s worrying too much about me 

Why are you trying to show off when you’re already weak from motion sickness? 

Kuro: Huh? I’m not trying to show off. But in this case I’m the one that got you involved 

Shu: Non! First of all, stop thinking so selfishly, saying you got me involved

Why are you thinking so negatively today in the first place? 

Kuro: …Well, isn’t it natural that we’d get into such a troublesome situation? 

Shu: And? Have I ever said I regretted that and wished I hadn’t taken on this job today?  

Kuro: That’s… I don’t think you’ve said it

Shu: Exactly. On the contrary, I’m enjoying today in its own way 

I haven’t had a bad time indulging in memories with you, Kiry— Ryu~kun 

So there’s no need to feel guilty about getting me “involved” 

Kuro: …What the hell. This is awfully sincere for you, Itsuki 

Shu: I mean I won’t be a crybaby who needs you to protect me forever 

I agreed to participate in this project of my own free will. I’ve become an adult now who can take responsibility for my own choices 

That much is enough to help you when you’re in trouble, Kiryu

So today, rely on me without another word. Snot-nosed brat, Ryu~kun 

Kuro: Haha, you’ve started calling yourself an adult. That wimpy crybaby Icchan…

Okay. If you’re gonna say that much, I’ll go along with your suggestion 

When the time comes, we can fall over together…♪

Shu: Stop talking under the assumption we’re going to fall!

Hmph. I’ll show you how to ride it right away. Hold on tight, Kiryu

I’ll show you plainly just how much I've grown since elementary school—

Chiaki: Boo…☆ Stop right there, Itsuki. It’s dangerous to ride a bike with two people on!

Shu: Gyah!? Morisawa, what are you doing here… Uwah!?

Kuro: We fell over immediately…

Shu: Ngh…. That’s because Morisawa frightened me just now

Kaoru: Are you two okay? That was some spectacular fall 

Kuro: Ah, we're okay. I shielded Itsuki just before we fell, so I think he’s okay too

Chiaki: That’s good then. But riding a bike with two people on is a serious traffic violation, you two better be careful!

Shu: I appreciate the advice, but I wish you’d stopped us a little more gently 

Chiaki: My bad. I was looking for an opportunity not to disturb your conversation, but you suddenly started running 

So I came in and yelled at you to stop…☆

Kuro: Anyways, you arrived really soon considering we just got off the phone? 

Nagisa: …The place is just surrounded by mountains, but it’s not actually that remote

Chiaki: Yup. In fact there were almost no cars or people passing by, so we were able to get here smoothly

Kaoru: That said, it’s still a mountain road. I think Itsuki’s heart is admirable, but it’s unreasonable to try and go down a mountain on a bicycle 

Shu: Sh-shut up, Hakaze! Secretly eavesdropping makes me question your integrity! 

Kuro: From the looks of it, these guys overheard our conversation just now

Mitsuru: Sorry. But, I told them to call out sooner! 

Chia-chan-senpai and everyone said it would be better not to disturb you though…

Kaoru: Ahaha. Well, I felt like you guys were having an important conversation 

Shu: Honestly… If I’d known you were coming to pick us up so soon I wouldn’t have gotten this bicycle 

Kuro: Neither of us can ride a bike in the first place, so there wasn’t much point in getting one anyway

Mitsuru: Now that you mention it. Both of you can't ride a bike? 

Kuro: …Try not to spread it around, Tenma. Not being able to ride a bike at this age doesn’t look cool 

Mitsuru: Uh-huh… I’ll keep it a secret. In that case you should learn to ride a bike, Kiryu~senpai!

Don’t worry! I’ll give you some special training on how to ride a bike! Of course Oshisan-senpai can come too!

Kuro: Haha, thank you Tenma. I think that’s a really good idea. Don’t you agree, Itsuki? 

Shu: I suppose. Although I wonder if you’ll be able to ride now that your motion sickness is so much more severe than when you were a child? 

Kuro: I’m not confident. Though I can’t sit with the feeling that I’ll be bad at it forever, can I? 

Shu: In that case I’ll accompany you to this special training. It's as though this is homework that you and I left unfinished when we were in elementary school 

Kuro: Yeah. I want to become an adult like you, Itsuki… ♪

Previous

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[ask-commander-arild]

Hello commander!! I was wondering, how do you get along with claus? Are you friends or is he only your boss?

... Huh? Oh... Claus? Yeah, I would say we get along pretty well. I'd met him at least a few times while he was still the commander, back everyone just kind of thought he was a robot, but, well... while it is true that he was and is my boss, I think we have this special bond that you can't really find anywhere else.

After everything happened with the needles or whatever, Claus gave a big speech outside the chimera lab, in which he revealed he was now the last person left in command and that he was, in fact, not a robot, but a human boy with a family and a whole life story, and how we're all humans with stories to tell and how we should all work together to tell our own stories and uplift each other for peace or something inspirational like that. It really was a nice speech, and while I was at the lab, I actually just had to watch the broadcast from inside while I was recovering from my... injuries and adjusting to my enhancements, so I wasn't really listening fully.

Anyway, I was just lying there, when I heard the door open and some doctors. They wheeled something in right next to me, said a few words, and then left. I pulled back the privacy curtain to see Claus laying on a table next to me!! Surprisingly, we both recognized each other and we got to talking. Apparently, he was there because a bolt of lightning fried his bionics and he needed repairs. We ended up bonding over a lot of things we had in common. Such as suffering tragedies that ended up getting us separated from our parents and being turned into chimeras for the army. You know, normal stuff.

Uhhhhh... all this to say, I think I'd say we have a pretty good relationship! As said, we have a lot in common, so it's never a dull moment when we're around. Well, when we aren't at work, that is. Even though he may be younger, he can be pretty scary as my boss, haha. But, outside of work stuff, we get along great! Even if he doesn't really appreciate me making fun of him, heheh...

(Art by @pkmoth! Go check them out!!!)

[scummy-writes]

might i ask.... and only if u can do it ofc......

P, I, and S (haha get it, im so sorry i could not just not do it) for gilbert.

bAHAHA thank you thank you (this is from this NSFW ask meme)

P= Pace (how fast they are and how long they last in bed)

got two qs that deal with stamina in some form, are you tryin to say smth- jkjk sjhfbjgd

Pace depends, I think. It depends on the headspace, and what is driving him towards the sex. Is it some sparking of jealousy? then he's pounding into you hard and fast, barely giving you time to recover from what his hands and mouth did before. It's rough, posessive, and the main focus is to pour his jealousy out in a way that it feels relieving to do so- he's able to 'mark' you as his again, and it quells whatever feelings he was having.

Meanwhile, normally... A mixture? I think he enjoys a steady pace somewhere in the middle, loves to drag his cock out sloooowly to make you whine more for him, and he wants to soak in your reactions to each and every thing he does to you. Seeing what he can reduce you to spurs on his excitement, plus the desire to make you more vocal/unrestrained with your pleasure ends up with him pounding a bit harder... faster... because suddenly he's very aware that being enamoured with every thing you do has lead to him not able to last as long as he wants... (i think this gets better over time and is primarily a result of finally, *finally*, being able to have you. but he usually supplements this with a lot of eating out/fingering/etc before sex to ensure that if he Does finish earlier than he wanted, that you'll be very satisfied still)

im gonna stop here AHAHA

I= Intimacy (in the moment romantic or rough/dirty)

i was gonna say it depends on what I said above, but no, actually.

Beginning of the relationship: rough, dirty, teasing, he doms a lot. His trust issues are very apparent, and for good reason, so I feel like he wants to display himself in such a way because old habits die hard, and he wants to keep you satisfied. He doesn't want you to see him as weak, and for a while, he knows being vulnerable, truly vulnerable, is going to make him feel weak. So he covers it up.

Later on.... He's able to be more slow, to murmur feelings that are closer to his heart than before. He's able to rock into you slowly, for what feels like ages, just so the two of you can just enjoy the pleasure of being intimate rather than just chasing the orgasm/overwhelming pleasure. This starts off with late late late/early morning sex, where sleepiness gives him an excuse to be a bit more sappy (he can blame it on lack of rest or something else). With romantic holidays or anniversaries, where he allows himself at least a few instances of showing his heart... and then later a few words turns into a few sentences, and then he's finally able to admit things he's wanted to admit for ages to you, in the quiet of privacy between the two of you, wanting to draw out smiles....................................................................a

S= Stamina (how many times they can go and how long each round lasts)

hmm i never really imagine an exact timeframe for these things. I think, if including foreplay, he wants to go for hours. I imagine that foreplay would be the brunt of that, however, especially as he heals.

Penetrative sex? I think it depends, 1-3 rounds? I feel like 3 rounds would be only on specific occasions. He probably settles for two. 'settles' as in his body often needs more time to recover to do any more than that, but he really wishes he could do more just due to the obsessive love of bringing you to the brink over and over....

but he doesn't have amazing stamina, so im not picturing him as a sex god or anything. he knows how to make you feel good and you both have a great time, but he's not over here competing with silvio's INSANE stamina

[aria-ashryver]

yooooo im SO tired, have a health update 💞

(which was going to be another video update but then a bird came and i got distracted and now im too tired to speak lol. also WOW imagine being so pale you create your own god rays slkdjf)

so, ive been feeling like hot garbage for some time, which is perhaps not surprising with the whole "was poisoned via chemo for a year, is still recovering" thing. Recently my heart has been feeling Not Good TM, and the fatigue waves are getting pretty extreme at times.

So, I followed this up with my doctor, very much expecting it to be a case of "no you're just out of shape / your asthma is playing up / you're just being super lazy, try harder, etc". He booked me a specialised heart test which I had last week.

Uhhh apparently I wasn't just being pathetic! (Which is somewhat gratifying to know that there is a reason things have been so hard lately and it's not just in my head)

There is a thing called your Ejection Fraction, which is essentially a measure of how much oxygenated blood your heart is pumping around your body -- its the factor that keeps you feeling energised.

Mine has dropped. Fairly significantly. When I had the same heart scan in October, mid-way through chemo, I was still retaining a lot of my heart health and muscle mass from when i was pre-chemo, so my EF was sitting at about 80. Which is a sign I was initially quite physically fit (or, to quote my oncologist: "giiiiirl, you a Boston Marathon runner or what?)

Since my last scan, my EF has dropped to 58. Which is still actually higher than average, most people sit at about 55, so I've dropped to an average range lol.

My heart is working, but such a significant jump is still cause for concern. My oncologist said that if I had been less young and fit, it would have been a case of dropping from 55 to somewhere in the 30s, to which he said "you'd struggle to even walk down that corridor at that point."

At this stage, I have a (hopefully reversible!) cardiomyopathy. Unfortunately, reduced heart and lung function can be complications of the two immune therapy drugs I am taking to prevent my cancer from coming back. So the current course of action is to put my immune therapy treatments on hold for 9 weeks to let my heart recover.

Yes, that is a tad spooky, but the drugs have a very long half-life, so I should be okay not taking them for that short period. On the plus side, this should hopefully improve my overall quality of life while my heart heals, and a break from immune therapy will be really nice anyway, because that shit hurts lmao.

Otherwise, the metastatic cancer in my spine and my hips remains stable and is still showing signs of healing because I am AWESOME AND COOL. Oh, and I also had a massive internal lesion (a chemo complication I never mentioned here bc like... if I told you guys every little thing that's wrong with me, we'd be here all day lmao) but that is now healing on its own too!! Woo!

So... ye. Gonna have a nap, knowing that medically my heart is broken and I have yet another reason to take it easy now haha.

Send me lots of "oi don't get cancer again in the next 9 weeks you absolute nugget" type vibes. I don't think I will, I'm not worried, but yk yk vibes are nice 🥰💝💖💓💕🩷💞 if you are still reading, I hope you have a wonderful day!!!

[literali1110]

Rookie 6x01 thoughts

(these are just my first thoughts as I watched, before looking at any reactions)

The Villian

Please tell me someone here has seen Orphan Black - all I can think off when I see Boyd is that Donnie/Alison money twerking bedroom scene and the opening scene of 6x01 didn't help with the flying money LOL

Did not expect them to get caught so fast - didn't know you could visual tap phones, interesting. Surprised these guys weren't using burners or something more sophisticated.

I thought Donnie (Boyd) would be around for longer, too bad, we needed a new villain. When Monica appeared I hoped it didn't mean Elijah will be back. Although hmm is Monica the new villain? Interesting.

Aaron/Angela/Nyla

Yay Aaron is back! Wow maternity leave is short. And so is recovering from a GSW apparently...missed Aaron's rich kid stories. And is there any wedding he can't save? haha

Nurse Lisa got a big part this episode!

They have an opportunity to deal with mental health for both Aaron and Nyla this season. The minute they focused on the card for Dr. Blair London I wondered if something might be happening between them and looks like I was right! (I generally am not a fan of the patient/therapist trope - looking at you, Suits - but given that she's not his main therapist...I'm open to seeing what happens.)

(Is it just me or was that first talk in the call room odd because none of the regulars were even sitting there?)

Chenford

Ok, I'm going to start with the end - the very last conversation they had was important, and of course Tim is going to struggle with this and I do want to see them explore it.

HOWEVER, the way I viewed the 'fight scene', I honestly don't think Tim's comment was that bad. He was supportive of her taking the test at the beginning of the conversation but when she said maybe she would wait, he was also supportive of that. I'm not sure in this case specifically his comment was something subconscious - he even said, you can do UC while you wait for the next test. And his problem is more with the UC, not the detective part.

I didn't love seeing Lucy so flustered, I missed seeing her confidence. (And I didn't love how they had her interact with Aaron and Wesley, although I'm sure it's not her first time seeing them.) Either way, for the sake of their personal relationship, maybe they shouldn't be riding together anymore if it puts Lucy back in this place of second guessing herself?

Basically, I want them to have a conversation about UC, I do think Tim is not OK with it deep down and it needs to be addressed but I don't think that one moment was connected to it, if that makes sense. It almost seemed like it was highlighting Lucy's own reservations with it! I'm interested to see other's thoughts.

P.S. What is the baby's name??

P.P.S. They're really giving us that Tim on one knee with Lucy holding a wedding ring next episode? cute.

[greensagephase]

Hi!!!

Well, I only have a few ideas about Miguel and Pavitr, but the thought of the two of them just makes me giggle. Here are some of my ideas:

1- If Pav had been the first one to join the Spider-Society, I could totally see him asking if he will ever grow fangs HAHAHAHA. The look on Miguel would be priceless. I can picture him like "Hey... so... do you know if I will ever get fangs? Because I have a date in two weeks and..."

2- They would have a competition over who can tolerate spice the most. Miguel would lose, and he would never be over it, but he just can't compete with Pavitr in this. To make matters worse, Pavitr would have been against the competition at first, but oh well, Miguel insisted for some reason (probably Lyla teased him), and Pav got competitive in the middle of it

3- Pav would call Miguel "Señor Miguel" without apparent reason. He just... started calling him that one day, and it stuck. Miguel likes it, but Jess teases him about so he pretends he doesn't

4- Pav would learn whatever Spanish he can from Miguel, even copying his accent. His pronunciation is surprisingly good as well. Miguel thought he was mocking him at first, but later found out Pav was just trying to impress his girlfriend by speaking Spanish

5- I think Pav would admire Miguel's intelligence. He just loves how organized and strategic Miguel and wishes he could be more like that. Miguel, on the other hand, feels at ease with how transparent Pav is, but he has conflictive emotions about his spontaneity. He likes it, but sometimes Pav can be reckless, and it gets on his nerves (in a good way, he is just worried about him) Miguel also learns to recognize when Pav is about to improvise in a fight and every time he does Miguel prays that it's a good idea and nothing too bad happens. He also admires how Pav can get along with basically anyone, but he won't tell him that obviously

6- Miguel once was about to make a joke about tea, but Lyla stopped him before he could say anything.

And that's basically it haha. I've been learning to draw Miguel so I can bring these to life, but that will have to wait a bit more. At least I already learned how to draw Miguel's face, so that's something

Anyway, I love your stories so much! And I'm sorry I something feels odd in my writing. English isn't my first language, and it's been a while since I've been in a class. All my knowledge of the English language comes from the internet now, haha

Omg, the fangs headcannon had me audibly giggling at 7am this morning when I read over this before I had to head out!!! The fangs 🤣 No, because I can imagine the way this would go. I can see Miguel, after explaining some things to Pav, asking, "Do you have any questions?" And Pav nodding (he's been thinking about it the entire time), but wondering if it would be rude to ask, but eventually he really wants to know, so he asks the question!! Can you imagine Lyla DYING of laughter? Miguel just stares at Pav, processing the question. Out of everything he said, Miguel thought Pav would be asking things about the multiverse, but no. "Ayy, mijo, no, you're not getting fangs." Miguel holds back from pinching the bridge of his nose in frustration (not at Pav but just like, he didn't think this would be a question for some reason). "This seems to be something only I have. At least from what I've seen." Pav proceeds to look relieved 🤣 and Miguel decides not to let him see the talons for a few days until there's more members so Pav won't be worried about them!!

Haha, the spice competition!! I've never had the opportunity to try Indian food (I really want to but I live in a somewhat remote and small area so I don't have any Indian food restaurants nearby), but I've read that Indian food is on another level of spiciness!! Miguel not getting over it, omg, imagine the grumpy face he must have had (after he recovered) and Pav feeling a little bad about it. Also, Lyla definitely teased Miguel into it. Can you imagine her teasing him about it every now and then? 🤣

Señor Miguel omg - wait, I can see Pav doing this out of politeness!! Because you know, you're supposed to show respect to the elders, so he decides to do it in Spanish. Ok, I love this one so much for some reason!! (We really need this duo - SONY, I BEG YOU!!!)

Pav learning Spanish from Miguel (I definitely think his pronunciation would be amazing!!!) To impress Gayatri 🥺 Do you think Miguel would find it endearing when he realizes? But also, can you imagine Pav learning so much that they begin to have a lot of conversations in Spanish?

Omg, the one with them admiring each other!! I love this one SO MUCH!! Miguel growing worried about Pav every time he decides to be spontaneous, omg 🥺 I wholeheartedly believe Miguel is like this with all the young members, but he doesn't show it these days because of everything that happened

The last headcannon, haha!! I can see this happening with the Miguel from before the events of Gabriella - when Miguel was witty (like in the ITSV credit scene), but Lyla definitely stopped him. She'd probably be like, "Miguel, don't. Just trust me on this one."

I LOVED all these headcannons!!! Thank you so much for sharing them with me!!! 🥹As to bringing them to life - I can't wait to see them!!!! I hope you're drawing is going well!! And I'm so happy that you've learned to draw Miguel's face!! I've also started to draw (because of Miguel), so I understand it's a learning process and wish you the best of luck!! As to your English, don't worry my friend!! Your English is fantastic!!!❤️ And thank you for the support on my writing, it truly means so much to me!! I hope you're doing well, and that you have a lovely day/night!!!

[storybounded]

15 Questions For The Writer

1. Are you named after anyone? Off of tumblr, my family named me after a character from the soap opera, 'D.ays of our Lives'.

2. When was the last time you cried? Mmmm. Christmas eve? Not going to divulge in that though haha. Just out of frustration.

3. Do you have kids? No.

4. Do you use sarcasm a lot? Oh yes, though I try not to use it against people who I don't know or who aren't keen with it. But if I hear someone use sarcasm, I'll do it right back.

5. What’s the first thing you notice about people? Mainly what clothes they are wearing. Or if they have a cute bag. Or listening to them react to their environment, whether it's positive or negative.

I can't look into faces of strangers I don't know. I know in interviews with a stranger for a job, it's a lot different, but I still have to force myself to give eye contact. Otherwise, it makes me physically uncomfortable if I don't know a person. So my eyes are usually drawn by colors of apparel first, or the sounds going on around me.

6. What’s your eye colour? Hazel Green

7. Scary movies or happy endings? Happy endings rn. I cannot physically stomach scary movies (or even shows with 'everyday' scary themes currently, but I know I will get back to those eventually).

But I was ruined with scary movies in 4th /5th grade when one of my old friends forced me to watch em'. I never recovered and C.huckie still is the stuff of nightmares to me, I cannot look at a baby doll the same way again 😂

8. Any special talents? ...falling up the steps rather than falling down. I swear, the amount of times I do it. Even my dog does it from time to time ( though she is very fine, she just slips on one step up but never falls completely.)

9. Where were you born? USA, Georgia.

11. Have you any pets? I am on my second pupper! First one passed of old age after high school, and I got the second a year and a half later and she is still going strong 😊

12. What sport do you play/have played? Oh my god. I am a limp noodle when it comes to sports and I don't play anything currently. I would be 'THAT kid who would be the last one to be chosen' type of bad LMAO

When I was little, my parents tried to force me to do sports, which is probably why I hated them for so long (though I have grown to appreciate them a decade ago and will not say no to trying out new things).

I know I did gymnastics in like...early elementary school years...I have a few plastic participation trophies from them l m a o. But I honestly cannot remember anything about it but the big foam cube pool. Ballet, but that did not last long at all despite also having two or three participation trophies. Little me HATED it. I felt so embarrassed wearing those frilly tutus during recitals... I was not that kind of little girl. It even came up during Christmas recently, and my grandpa admitted to me that I NEVER looked like I was having fun during those show recitals, I always had this look of ' 'I have no clue what I am doing' and 'why am I here' while my mom and grandma always raved about how cute I look in that heavy makeup lmao. Because apparently I never looked out to the crowd, I always watched what the other kids were doing and tried to keep up. 😂 I think I must've been like. 5 at the time.

I think?? I did one lesson with horse riding, but even though I enjoyed it, I was never taken back to it. But I was so little and I realize now that costs are expensive l m a o.

I think I went to tennis practice two times in elementary and was done. They tried to put me in cheerleading classes, which was laughable, I did one class and said no. Karate...was more interesting in middle school since it was the first time I chose it, but I was frustrated that I could never remember what to do during performances and my parents were never supportive anyway since they wanted me to be in the "girly girl" sports.

All in all, all the personal sports memories I have are rather negative, which was unfortunate.

13. How tall are you? 5 foot 3 inches. s m o l l.

14. Favourite subject in school? Other than art, I loved when the football coaches in high school taught history because they made it fun.

15. Dream job? I would absolutely love to do something with my art. Currently, taking baby steps to make them feel achievable. Current SMALL dream is to open up an etsy to run on side while working a job. I got a heat press to make shirts, and I got a cricut to make all sorts of others things.

tagging: YOU tagged by: @yukikorogashi (thank you friendo!)