#so i feel excluded from that community. like i cant make art abt it because i dont have the right to. and its disheartening)
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perenlop · 1 day ago
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something that may raise some eyebrows. but i am sort of exhausted of censoring my own experiences and treating life before coming out as a part of me that shouldn't be talked about in fiction.
#okay not ME in this case but the thing holding me back with the scorpion family thing is like.#the point that castor is pre transition in it. and him being pre transition is important because it is a time in his life where#he is suffocating#and flipping between that and his adult self where he is out and free and living his own life is supposed to be a breath of relief#but. im used to ppl being like ''if you EVER portray a trans character pre transition then youre a fucking freak''#and i get why people wouldnt want to do that. they shouldnt have to.#but... idk. i wish we could portray all of ourselves in art. how we have grown over the years#my younger self is still a part of me. she wouldnt recognize me but i would protect her if i could.#i dont want to destroy her. pretend she never existed. she deserves better than that. she was struggling enough as it were#and thats sorta how i want castor to regard ''dawn''. he resented her. he's glad he's not her anymore.#but most of all he feels angry for her sake and is glad she's not struggling anymore. he's still here. he's alive. he made it.#and he's different now but he'll always defend that scared little girl#echoed voice#(i think its also like... ppl separating ''nonbinary'' from trans. to the point ppl think we literally cant call ourselves trans#so i feel excluded from that community. like i cant make art abt it because i dont have the right to. and its disheartening)#also this is... maybe a very hot take. but characters arent people. theyre tools. theyre not gonna be offended if you show their deadname#think of WHY you want to show their deadname. most of my characters deadnames aren't known bc they're not important at all#but castor's will here because i've decided that it's narratively important. because names and what they mean to ourselves is the theme her#it also helps that that was nooot his only name. hes been through those things like candy#ok this was very much a rambling incoherent babbling post ty for your time
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mjm56-a · 5 years ago
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HOW I RUN MY BLOG
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Speed:          i can be..... SO SLOW when replying to threads. it honestly just depends on my mental health for the day and if i feel capable enough to write. i can easily range from “i will reply to this thread Immediately” to “the bubonic plague has overtaken my physical form and its gonna take me a few weeks to get to it”. same goes for asks as well, but im always active on discord if u want to yell @ me
Replies:       my replies usually stay in my drafts; as soon as i get to see ur reply to our thread, i save it to my drafts to make sure i dont lose it. i post them as soon as theyre ready and i dont rlly utilize my queue for things reply-wise-- mostly just for aesthetics, art, promos, etc. they can get.. way too lengthy tbh and i always tag my threads as “long thread //” as soon as the writing starts to exceed the length of the web browser. i cant really HELP IT, i just have a tendency to write a lot abt the thoughts of my muse . i apologize if this comes off as prose;  i try my hardest not to go into that territory and to make sure my replies are as coherent as possible
Starters:      as for starter calls, i can get super sidetracked, especially when i have 5+ people liking them and expecting from me, and i know that i say “ough this could range from a sentence to a paragraph” but i know DAMN well im gonna be writing a paragraph for every person because one liners just feel so..... dry to me??  even with this making starters arent really my strongest suit
Inbox:        my inbox is always open for mutuals for interactions, questions abt maji, or jokes! all that i ask is that PLEASE only come into my inbox for interactions if we mutually follow each other. i dont care if we previously interacted mutuals are ALWAYS welcome to come in and fuck around!!
Selectivity:           i’m mutually exclusive, first and foremost.  i don’t how how to really describe my selectivity-- usually, if you have a tagging system, a rules page, an about, and arent flooding ur blog with so much ooc that the ic feels rare, ill be following you, even if i dont know much about the franchise.  (all excluding the communities listed in my rules that i wont interact with LOL)
Wishlist:         I WANNA WRITE MY YAKUZ//A 0 VERSES!!!!!!!! HOLY SHIT!!!! i know that pretentious yaku/za fans are like “uumgmghhh y0 is so overrated uumgmghh uugg” but GOD!!!! y0 will always be super close to my heart, as it was the game that got me into the series and ever since i started this blog i’ve been super excited to one day get to write my ponytailed depressed idiot !!!! i know i love angst and sad shit but i also rlly wanna highkey write goofy shit too-- maji is a goofy clown ass bitch and i wanna write him being a goofy clown ass bitch, yfeel???? i wanna write my clown!!! the majim/a circus is back in town!!
Honest Note:         i feel afraid that im putting off mutuals from interacting with me, kinda afraid im intimidating but PLEEASSEE let me assure u im Baby. i am Baby Fucking Idiot. i know for a fact that there are people who are intimidated by interacting w muses from the series in general simply bc theres so much content but PLEEASE feel free to ask me any questions abt the games that u want in order to have a better understanding of them bc ill probably be able to answer them-- im almost done w/ dead souls, a good portion thru 5 and i recently started 6 but im waiting to complete 5 before i go on with beating it, yknow?? just know that if im following u and ur following me back, that means i am interested in writing and interacting and this is an invitation for u to bother me or slide into my inbox or dms to talk!!! i love u
Tagged by:  stolen bc im a filthy filthy thief Tagging:   steal it !
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