#so here you go my fellow book nerds

[artemismatchalatte]

Mostly WLW (and a few MLM) books I've bought in 2023

Passing Strange by Ellen Klages and The Night Watch by Sarah Waters (both are historic fiction WLW)

Like Water by Rebecca Podos (WLW YA) and One Last Stop by Casey McQuinston (WLW New Adult)

Cemetery Boys by Aidan Thomas (I think MLM YA with a trans MC?) and Our Wives Under The Sea by Julia Armfeild (Contemporary Adult WLW)

The Unlit Lamp by Radclyffe Hall (implied WLW classic) and The Trials of Radclyffe Hall by Diana Souhani (Biography of gnc lesbian writer Radclyffe Hall)

What Makes Girls Sick and Tired by Lucile de Peslouan and Genivive Darling (Graphic Novel on Feminism) and Hear us out: Lesbian and Gay Stories of Progress, Struggle and Hope from the 1950s to the Present by Nancy Garden (2000s; WLW and MLM history and historic fiction)

I had an idea for a new kind of book photoshoot. These were all bought used via Thriftbooks.com this year.

[athenamikaelson]

Written in the Stars

Klaus Mikaelson x Reader!Soulmate x Elijah Mikaelson PART 1

Word Count- 4.3k

Warnings- Swearing, blood, death, panic attacks, mentions of the confederacy (ew)

A/N- This will be a slow-burn series.

The reader has a brother, I know it’s not very X Reader, but it’s to help the storyline.

I brush down the black tie my younger brother is wearing, the satin fabric making me slightly cringe. 

“Are you sure you’re not going to go? We can go show those stuffy old bitches how to really party.” I let out a small huff at Theo’s question, shaking my head amusingly. 

“I’d rather not spend my Friday night with a bunch of Mystic Falls’ elite. Hearing them talk about how they’re so proud of their southern heritage,” Both my brother and I let out sounds of disgust, “the Confederates lost get over it.”

Theo stands in front of the hallway mirror and goggles himself. Where I am rather introverted, my younger brother is most likely the most self-confident person I have ever met. He has called himself, “A gift to the human race,” on more than one occasion. So it takes him about a good 9 minutes to gaze at himself in the mirror before we walk out the front door to the car. 

We drive in silence, or I drive in silence as Theo hypes himself up in the passenger side mirror. 

After a 10-minute drive that seems to have taken at least twice that time, we finally reach the long driveway of the mayor’s house. 

“Why are you even going to this masquerade thing anyways, you hate dances,” I ask him as we wait behind a line of cars.

“Tyler is my football captain, and this thing is to honor his father, I’m here for my fellow man,” Theo presses a fist to his chest and puts on a fake sympathy look.

“So you’re actually doing it because you want to get on Tyler’s good side so he puts you on Varsity?”

Theo’s sympathetic look drops and is replaced with a shit-eating grin, “You know me so well.”

As we get to the front of the line of cars, I hum along to the Coldplay song playing on the radio.

“So what are you going to do while waiting for me?”

I pull my car up to the front of the “house” which is really just a mansion. 

“I have a feeling you won’t be here very long, or stay out of trouble so I’m just going to park somewhere and wait for you.”

My brother does a look that looks like he agrees with me about him getting into trouble and nods his head in agreement. I put the car in park and Theo unbuckles his seat and gets out, straightening out his suit as he goes.

“Bye nerd, don’t wait up!” Theo yells as he climbs the stairs walking past Mystic Falls’ elite. I let out a sigh and pull away to find a parking spot. 

—

My fingers graze the pages of my book as I glance at the time, Theo has been here for over an hour now and hasn’t shown any signs of leaving. I bring my back up to continue reading when a figure in the distance catches my eye. I lean forward and catch a glimpse of who I believe is Elena Gilbert. Elena’s a popular girl in my grade, who I’ve probably had two interactions within my short time here in Mystic Falls. I don’t know much about her other than that she’s dating some guy named Stefan, her parents died in a car accident and her brother is in the same grade as Theo. Theo and Elena’s brother don’t hang out either because Theo says he’s a “stoner emo.” Theo’s never been one to keep his thoughts to himself. 

Elena seems to walk with a slight limp which makes me slightly concerned but nothing to make me go out and try to talk to her. I hate talking to people in general, especially kids my age. Elena has always seemed nice but I’m not taking the risk.

 Or at least I wasn’t until I saw a man in a mask start following behind her. I may hate interacting with people but I would never let another girl get attacked if I had the power to stop it. The next thing I know I’m hopping out of my car and jogging behind them. 

“Elena behind you!” I yell to her, but I freeze as the man hits her and knocks her to the ground. I let out a yelp as I turned to try to get help but a sharp pain hits my skull and everything goes black. 

—-

“Y/N, can you hear me?” A voice comes from above me and a wave of nausea washes over me. My eyes open and close a dozen times trying to get used to the bright light before I can focus on the person in front of me. Elena Gilbert. Why is Elena Gilbert in my bedroom?  I mean she’s really pretty and all I just thought she had a boyfriend. I’m not a homewrecker. 

“Oh thank god you’re awake!” Elena whisper-yells to me as she brushes a piece of my hair behind my head and grimaces when she looks at my forehead. She brings her hand back and a wave of fear and disgust washes over me as I see her hand covered in a red liquid. Blood. My blood. I try to bring my hand up but Elena stops me.

“Don’t exert yourself we don’t want it to bleed more, okay?” She gives me a small smile but something about it makes me feel uneasy. I don’t understand why until I turn my gaze away from her and look at our surroundings. Dirt-covered walls, glass-covered floors, and a mildew stench are what take focus. I’ve always been sensitive to smells but with the addition of my raging migraine, I am fighting the urge to keep down the rising bile in my throat. 

My breathing starts to quicken and I can feel the start of a panic attack starting to make an appearance. 

“Elena, where are we?” I wouldn’t be surprised if she didn’t understand what I was saying since my words seemed to be jumbling together. 

Elena glances around us and gives me a solemn look.

“I don’t know, I woke up here a little while ago before I was knocked back out by the people that took us. I’m truly sorry about this Y/N, I would never wish for you to be a part of this.”

I furrow my eyebrows at her last comment as if she were responsible for the reason we were taken.

“It’s not your fault,” I shake my head and start tapping my fingers together one by one. It’s a thing I do whenever my anxiety gets too strong, almost as a way to ground me. 

Elena’s eyebrows mirror mine and she goes to say something but a young man with shaggy hair walks in.

“Oh goody, the other ones awake. How are you doing sleeping beauty?” 

The man starts to walk over to me with a look in his eyes that makes the bile in my throat inch even closer to the surface. But within another second Elena stands from beside me on what I can see now is a couch and blocks me from the man’s view.

“I’m the one you want, Y/N is innocent, just let her go.” 

I want to back Elena up and defend her too but with the migraine and the onslaught of emotions I’m feeling right now being verbal isn’t something I see happening in my current future. 

“You’re right Dopalicious, she’s not, but I can’t just let her go, what if she were to go and warn those friends of yours? Can’t let that happen now can we?” 

Elena goes to stand her ground but within a blink of an eye, Elena is shoved backward and lands on the other side of the couch. I jump backward at the action which gives the man the opportunity to come in front of me. I start trembling as I look up to him I try to push farther back into the couch but I’m squished into it as far as I can go. 

“Stay away from me,” Finally able to find somewhat of my voice again. This doesn’t seem to scare away the man, and honestly, I don’t blame him. My voice sounded like it came from a scared 5-year-old. 

“Just a taste, I’m starving.” My mouth opens to question what he says but a millisecond later I feel myself being grabbed and a sharp piercing attacks the left side of my neck. I’m hyperventilating and screaming at the same time somehow as I hear Elena’s yells from beside us. 

“Don’t touch her!” Elena’s yell comes from beside us and I’m thrown away back onto the couch. I’m disorientated as I look up to see the man before me rubbing his cheek and Elena standing next to him holding her right hand. She’d punched him. My vision strays from Elena’s red knuckles back up to the man, who has something dripping from his mouth. My chest feels like it locks up as I stare at the liquid dripping, everything seems to be going in slow motion for me as I watch the drops start at the man's chapped lips to the drops of blood falling onto the cracked hardwood floors. Wait, blood. He has blood dripping from his mouth. Had Elena punched him that hard? I start to believe that possibility until I feel a wetness drip between my chest. 

My already shaking hand comes up to my chest as I swipe a finger along the liquid. My vision blurs as the red liquid drips from my fingertip down into the palm of my hand. I can’t register Elena’s voice as she kneels in front of me and presses something to my neck. The blood coating my hand is all I can see and smell. 

“Y/N….Y/N! Just focus on my voice ok, breathe. I think you’re having a panic attack.” A cool hand is pressed onto the side of my face and I close my eyes at the embrace. 

“Ok that’s good, I’m going to stand you up to get a better look at your neck ok?” 

I feel like I’m running on auto-pilot or something else is controlling my body and mind as I stand up and grip Elena’s upper arms to keep myself steady. Elena returns the pink fabric from my neck and leans down to glance at the wound.

“Ok, it’s not as bad as I had originally thought. Just keep this here and it’ll help control the bleeding.” 

I must still be in shock because Elena has to bring the shirt to my hand, wrap my fingers around it, and finally press my hand into my neck. The shock of pain washes through me and brings me back to reality. My vision can’t seem to focus on one thing for too long as my eyes keep darting from the blood on the floor, my blood, to the look on Elena’s face, to the man standing behind us with a scowl on his ugly face. Blood, Elena, man. Blood, Elena, man. Blood, Elena, man. This sequence continues until another person enters the room, a woman.

“He’s here.” The woman with a pixie cut says, her voice seemingly scared.

The man next to us shifts his scowl into a look of pure fear.

“This was a mistake,” He rushes over to the woman and shakes his head. 

“No, I told you I would get us out of this. You have to trust me,” She tries to talk him down which only seems to freak him out more.

“No! He wants me dead Rose,”

The woman points at Elena, “He wants her more.” I glance to Elena who is standing in front of me slightly as if to hide me from the two strangers or cannibals. Since I’ve calmed down momentarily and I’ve begun to stop the tears that had unbeknownst to me had fallen on my cheeks, I’ve realized that I’ve been kidnapped by cannibals, that being the only reasonable explanation I can come up with.

The two cannibals start arguing about some man but I turn to Elena who looks almost as scared as I feel. 

“What’s going on Elena, who’s coming?” I whisper to her.

Elena turns her head slightly to me and gives me a frown and a shake of her head. 

“A man named Elijah, but don’t worry ok,” Elena grabs my free hand and holds it in her own, “I’m not going to let them hurt you anymore ok?”

I nod trying to find comfort in her words but the girl in front of me is 17 years old and maybe 120 pounds I don’t see how she’s going to protect us both from two cannibals and whatever mega cannibal these two are terrified of. I don’t know if the other guy is a cannibal but using context clues I’m guessing he is. 

“What are we?” The woman’s voice brings my attention back to them as I see her grab his arms. This seems to calm the man down. 

“We’re family. Forever.” 

I might’ve found this endearing if it weren’t for the fact the man had my blood drying on his upper lip and they were literal cannibals. 

A loud knock startles all four of us as Elena and I both shoot each other wary glances. Our hands are still intertwined. I don’t usually like being touched but given the circumstances I can let this slide. 

The woman looks over at Elena and me as Elena slightly turns her head, “You’re scared.” Elena comments. The woman says something else to her friend and then runs up the stairs 

—

What seems like forever of waiting and pacing around is broken up by footsteps coming from the top of the banister. I can feel Elena freeze up from beside me as we both look up to see a man in a suit staring down at her. The man has dark hair and eyes and a chiseled face. Why is this cannibal not ugly? Wrong Turn had it all wrong. We all stand there watching Elena and the suited cannibal stare at each other. I can feel Elena’s shaking hand in my own and try to comfort her by squeezing her hand to let her know I’m right beside her. That is until the man transports himself from the top of the banister to in front of Elena in the blink of an eye. The movement has me losing my balance and falling back onto the couch. 

No one seems to notice me as my panic attack starts to build up as I try to understand how this is possible. How could he have been that fast, it’s impossible. Oh god, I'm going to throw up. 

“And who is this?” A deep voice comes from above me and my stomach flips at the sound. Defiantly going to throw up. 

“She’s no one. She has nothing to do with this, just please leave her alone.” 

Hearing Elena’s voice makes me raise my head and I regret it instantly because I lock eyes with the suited monster who is now standing above me staring down at me. The man’s face instantly goes slack as his eyes meet mine, a look of recognition seems to pass through his dark eyes as they move fast across my face. The man opens and closes his mouth many times as if he can’t quite find the right words to say. The slack expression from before softens into something that makes my stomach flip again. This guy is so going to kill me when I throw up on his expensive ass shoes. His soft, dark pink lips curve up at the corners slightly.

“You’re real.” 

These are the first words to come out of the man’s mouth. Everyone else in the room seems to know just as much as me with what he’s talking about because they all have looks of confusion on their faces. Feels somewhat comforting to be on the same page as everyone else for once. 

The man doesn’t once take his eyes off of me this entire time though, “What is your name, Elskan?” 

I freeze under his stare and try to avert my eyes, this gives Elena the ability to step in for me. 

“Her name is Y/N,” I look to the man as he mouths my name slightly to himself as if he wants to know how it sounds on his tongue, “Please don’t hurt her Elijah, she doesn’t even know about the supernatural, I’ll go with you willingly.” 

Elena’s words make me freeze up. What does she mean by supernatural? I flinch as the man, Elijah, brings his hand up. This stops him for a moment. 

“I would never harm you. You have my word on that.” I can only sit there frozen as he cups my face with his hand and uses his thumb to brush a stray tear away that must’ve fallen during one of my many panic attacks. He seems delighted at the moment until the soft expression he has on his face darkens into something that makes that bile rise even farther up. His eyes dart from the top of my head and drag themselves down to my chest and neck. I try to move away but his hand has a soft but firm hold on my face. 

“Who did this to you?” 

My eyebrows furrow at his question, and I must’ve not answered quickly enough because he turns to glare at Elena. Which makes her flinch.

“The head injury is from the kidnapping and then the bite is from um,” she glances towards my neck and then to Trevor who looks like he’s about to internally combust. She goes silent again at Elijah’s stare and he turns his attention back towards me. The glare was long gone and replaced once again with a softer look.

“I see. Here,” I have to swallow back down the bile as I watch the man rip into his wrist and put it in front of my face expectantly. I sit there in horror and quickly look to Elena who doesn’t look as surprised as she defiantly should given that this man just BIT HIMSELF. 

“It’s true Y/N, it’ll heal you.” 

I open my mouth to say something which must’ve somehow been an ok to the man as he presses his wrist to my open mouth. I’m about to push him off, or at least try, but stop at the heavenly liquid that spills into my mouth. Elijah brings his other hand up to brush back my fallen hair.

  “Good girl, Elskan.” 

Elijah removes his wrist and I sit there silently staring at my lap as I realize what I had just done. I just drank fucking blood, and I liked it?!??! Oh god, does this make me a cannibal now?

Elijah seems to be fighting an inner battle as he moves his eyes away from mine and onto the man behind us. Elena and I watch before us as Elijah approaches the scared man/cannibal thing. Thing because I’m not sure what the actual hell is going on here. 

“I’ve waited so long for this day, Elijah. Truly very sorry.” 

Trevor says with a bowed head as Elijah circles him. Almost how a predator would circle its prey. 

“Well, no, your apology is not necessary,” Elijah responds but something in his tone doesn’t sit right with me.

“Yes, yes it is. You trusted me with Katerina. And I failed you.”

“Well, yes, you are the guilty one,” Elijah glances at him and then up to the woman, “And Rose aided you because she was loyal to you. That I honor…”

Elijah comes to stand in front of the man, “Where was your loyalty?”

“I beg your forgiveness.”

The oxygen in the room seems to be dwindling as everyone watches the interaction.

“So granted.” 

The deep breath I was to let out is replaced by a scream and I can only watch in horror as Elijah throws his hand over to the man who decapitates him. A heart-wrenching wail comes from Rose and I can’t seem to take my eyes away from the body-less head that is lying in front of me. 

“I’m going to-” Vomit spits from my mouth and onto the floor in front of me, the burning from the back of my throat causes tears to build up and block my vision. I feel someone lift my hand and hold it away from my face. For a second I thought it was Elena before Elijah’s voice came from beside me.

“I’m truly sorry, Elskan. I shouldn’t have done that in front of you.” 

I lift my head to stare at him and find him kneeling right next to me. He reaches into his front pocket grabs a fancy napkin and wipes my mouth with it. Not seeming disgusted just saddened. He wraps his hand in my mind and stands me up. 

“We can leave now, we have quite the journey ahead of us,” Elijah leads me over to where Elena is standing and motions for her to follow.

“No! What about the moonstone?” She questions him.

He stands in front of her with a small scowl, “What do you know about the moonstone?”

“I know that you need it. And I know where it is. I can help you get it”

Elijah nods his head, “Tell me where it is.” 

“It doesn’t work that way.”

Elijah’s eyebrow twitches in annoyance as he glances back at Rose, “Are you negotiating with me?”

Rose just shakes her head and tells him she doesn’t know anything. Elijah then turns back around to stare at Elena for a moment before scowling and reaching up to her necklace, ripping it off. 

“What is this vervain doing around your neck,” He throws the necklace behind him and grabs Elena by the neck, dropping my hand in the process. I go to try to get her away but Elijah shoots me a warning look that has me freezing in place, “Tell me where the moonstone is.”

In a monotone voice, Elena replies, “In the tomb underneath the church ruins.”

“What is it doing there?”

“It’s with Kathrine.”

The rest of their interaction is cut short when a glass shatters from somewhere upstairs. Elijah comes over to me and grabs me by my waist bringing me into him almost protectively. 

“What was that?” He asks Rose.

“I don’t know.”

“Who else is in this house?’’ To which he gets the same response. 

Elijah grabs Elena quite harshly with his free hand and guides both of us to the top of the banister. His hand never moved from the top of my hip. Once we make it to the entryway something rushes by us, Elijah pushes Elena off into Rose’s arms but never drops his hold on me. 

“Up here.”

“Down Here.”

A voice call from the top and bottom of the stairs caught all of our attention. Elijah lifts his hand from my hip and motions for me to go over to Rose.

“Don’t let her out of your sight.” He warns her as he moves to the staircase. 

A moment goes by before something flies through the air and pierces itself through Elijah’s hand. I let out a yelp but Elijah doesn’t even seem fazed. 

My vision is blurred for a moment as I now standing next to Rose with an unfamiliar dark-haired man in front of us. He motions with his finger to be quiet. Ya as if I was going to say anything anyway. 

“Excuse me,” Elijah’s voice comes from below, “To whom it may concern. You’re making a grave mistake if you think that you can beat me. And you can’t. You hear that? I repeat, you cannot beat me. So I want the girls on the count of three, or heads will roll.” 

The man who has his hands on Rose’s and I’s mouths moves his head to glance at Elijah downstairs. 

“Do we understand each other?” 

“I’ll come with you,” I perk up at Elena’s voice. Wondering what the actual hell she was doing. But the blue-eyed man in front of me shakes his head at me telling me not to move. 

“Just please don’t hurt my friends. They just wanted to help me out.”

“What game are you playing with me? Where is Y/N? I won’t be leaving without her.” Elijah’s skeptical voice questions her. There’s a sound a medal, and then a loud boom,  before Elijah lets out a yell. The sound for some reason makes my chest feel like it wants to cave in on itself. Rustling and fighting sounds come from below us before the man holding Rose and I leave. Rose runs after him, but I can’t seem to get my feet to work so I just sit there on the dusty floor staring at the wall peeling wallpaper in front of me. 

A few moments pass before I hear Elena’s voice along with two unfamiliar men, one who I’m assuming is the blue-eyed guy from before. 

“Where is Y/N,” Elena asks.

“Are you talking about that girl that smells like vomit?” A snarky voice questions her. If I hadn’t just gotten kidnapped and had one of the worst days of my life, I might take offense but I did just get kidnapped and honestly, I do smell like vomit so he’s not wrong. 

“I think she’s over there.” 

Footsteps get closer to me as I look up with tears in my eyes at Elena. She gives me a small smile before kneeling and wrapping her arms around me in a hug. 

“What is happening Elena?” 

“I’ll explain everything if you want me to ok? Let’s just get out of here first ok?”

Elena stands up and reaches down her hand for me to take, and with a deep breath, I do.

[becausegoodheroesdeservekidneys]

Is there any chance we could have a round up of the Circus? I am so lost on how the dominoes fell over the last 40 days

Okay this is not comprehensive, because (a) my husband the politics nerd is currently on his way to a gig in west Wales somewhere and so cannot chime in and also (b) all our political journalist friends are understandably quite busy right now doing political journaling, but I seem to have an influx of new followers who are also very confused and don't understand what's going on, so I shall try.

Alright so what we're seeing here is the Second Clownfall of 2022, the hotly anticipated sequel to the Adventures of Big Dog the Clown. However it revolves around the character of Liz Truss, and will use some terminology, so

Previous Reading

Important Terminology - Required Reading

What is a Whip?

How do Whips work?

Shadow Cabinet

Front Benchers, Back Benchers and the Cabinet

What do we need to call an early General Election?

The Adventures of Big Dog the Clown - Suggested Reading

Part One

Part Two

Part Three

Part Four

Elanor's Guide to Liz Truss - Suggested Reading

Character-based prequel

...okay I think that's everything. On with the show!

The Premiership of Liz Truss (2022-2022)

Week One

We begin our tale on September 5th, 2022. Coincidentally, that was also the date that I personally started my new job. Let's see which of us does better!

The Daily Mail is delighted, and runs a headline proclaiming "Cometh the hour, cometh the woman". Tory rag in a frock coat the Financial Times runs an op-ed:

So the results ARE IN! She will definitely fuck us up! But that's a good thing for vague reasons! Blitz spirit everyone. Tally ho, pip pip, shoot a servant and have sex with a wall, hey what. Good old Blighty.

(That's my best impression of Tories I'm good at their accents I hope you like it)

Truss does an interview with Laura Kuenssberg, and fellow guest and comedian Joe Lycett wildly and effusively applauds her every word. Even Liz realises no one would sincerely applaud her. Bafflingly, the entire right wing press and every member of the Tory party freak out about this, because they don't understand the function of a satirist and don't know how to defend against it. It is extremely funny. Joe Lycett announces he's a right-wing comedian now, and begins a new extended career bit effusively and sarcastically praising right wing politicians. They all cry extensively and call him mean.

SO, it's been a long hard leadership campaign! But she made it. For years, Tories have been blighted by the curse of the PM/Chancellor relationship, backstabbing and cheating and lying about each other to try and get power. But not our Liz, oh no; her Chancellor is Maths Mate and BFF Kwasi Kwarteng, an insipid and poisonous gnome known for three (3) things:

He once wrote a stupid book with Liz Truss about his stupid opinions on how he thinks economics work and everyone laughed at him and stuffed him in a locker

On the night of the Brexit vote he was overheard by a journalist gleefully saying “Who cares if sterling crashes? It will come back up again“ which are of course the words of a man who knows all about economics and how they work

This fucking bullshit back in July:

But hey IT'S OKAY! Everything is fine! Because Liz and Kwasi are BFFs who certainly never had an affair and are marching in lockstep and have each other's backs and both love maths more than their own children if they had any! Maths Friends!

Multiple resignations immediately follow.

Among them is Ben Elliot, the Tory Party chair, which is a pretty big deal from a man who just lived through the Johnson years; also, shockingly, Priti Patel, the deportation-happy Home Secretary, decides that even as an animatronic goblin she cannot support this nonsense.

It's not a resignation per se, but at ten to seven in the evening it's announced that Andrew Bridgen, the Troy MP for Leicestershire North West, has been evicted from his home and ordered to pay £800,000 in legal costs, and a possible £244,000 in rent arrears. Also described as "dishonest" by a judge.

This is not directly relevant to Liz Truss but look, it was a staggeringly weird day and this was basically the topper.

Anyway.

Liz goes to the Palace and is duly sworn in by the Queen, who promptly keels over and dies the very next day. Parliament is instantly shut down for mandatory mourning. As omens go, this one was not subtle.

This triggers the circulation of some very awkward footage of Young Truss talking about how she thinks the Monarchy should be abolished for being a gross relic of horrifying social stratification. However you must understand that it's not awkward because anyone thinks she murdered the Queen. It's because Liz Truss's attempts at public speaking are like sitting through a children's Christmas play when you're the only person in the audience and they can all see your face so you have to look encouraging for four hours when inside you are shrivelling into something approximating an apricot pit travelling to the core of Jupiter.

Take a look at her acceptance speech and wither.

Anyway we're now several MPs and a queen down so she's got to get on replacing those so she can focus on her real love: the much-anticipated mini-budget that she is preparing with Kwasi to save the UK from the harrowing quagmire of crippling poverty that Big Dog managed to drive us into (all while pretending it wasn't Big Dog who did it.)

Fortunately, she does not need to replace the queen! Monarchies take care of themselves, which many people would argue is very much the problem, of course. They had a proper reunion with Meghan From Suits and Meghan From Suits' husband, both of whom were banned from visiting Balmoral, and also the Nonce flew in, who was allowed to visit Balmoral. Such heartwarming scenes.

But the Cabinet, that's another matter. That's something Liz DOES have to do, and it's important she gets it right, Tumblrs, because you see, every time a Cabinet minister is replaced it's expensive and a hassle and it weakens a government by making them look all crumbly, like a packet of biscuits that's been rammed against a wall and now someone is opening it and everyone is bracing for Crumbs.

So, step forward to the Cabinet soulless ghoul Suella Braverman, the new Home Secretary. She immediately distinguishes herself by trying to legalise torture.

And then, naturally,

YEAH THAT'S RIGHT IT'S TICK TOCK TERF O'CLOCK also FUCK the sovereignty of the Scottish Parliament amirite ladies lol Girl Power uwu

Not that she can actually do anything at this point, of course. As I say: Enforced Mourning is in process, which means Parliament is shut down for ten days. No work, no speeches, no appearances, no announcements, just taxpayer's money going on legal fees to see if she can interfere with another nation's elected government in order to strip away the human rights of queer people.

However, while we all weep over the corpse of Queen Lizzie Two and beat our breasts in grief, the already-beleaguered pound is slowly bleeding out through this inaction. And this, to the Maths Mates, is unacceptable.

Two things get quietly slid into the news cycle.

Thing the First:

BIG YIKES LADS

Thing the Second:

Fracking ban in England lifted in bid to boost UK gas supply - BBC News

For those who don't know, fracking is an energy extraction process. Water, gas and dust are pumped at high pressure into shale bedrock to crack it open, releasing pockets of natural gas that can then be harvested for fuel. It's environmentally disastrous for multiple reasons, both direct (earthquakes, groundwater pollution, social impacts) and indirect (IT'S STILL A FOSSIL FUEL YOU STUPID CUNTS ARE YOUR SKULLS FUCKING EMPTY). The Welsh and Scottish governments have both banned it outright, a straight-up "Foot down no, petal". England, though, is the Tory paradise, so the ban was less complete.

However, this is still a Huge Deal - the 2019 Tory manifesto was very clear that fracking would only be unbanned IF "the science shows categorically that it can be done safely". In fact, most Tories don't like it either. Their constituents REALLY don't. Also in March Kwasi Kwarteng literally went on record and said it wouldn't lower European gas prices anyway; but not anymore! Now he thinks it's a zippy idea. Just spiffing. Top hole, pip pip (I'm so good at their accents :))

Scientists who have been studying the environmental impacts of fracking produce their report -

And it is quietly buried, so as not to offend the corpse of Lizzie Two.

Here ends the first four days of the Reign of Liz Truss.

Second Week

Anyway, royalists have gone insane and started a REALLY BIG queue to see a box that supposedly contains the rotting cadaver of the old queen. Multiple people have to be hospitalised because they join the Queue and don't take food, water, warm clothes, or essential daily medications with them, even though the Queue is literally days long. Some die. Many take the ashes of their own loved ones so they can wave them at the box for the thirty seconds they get to be in front of it, like a sort of play date for ashes.

Prince Charles, now King Prince Charles, starts swanning about as King, demanding everyone be sad for him and clap him to cheer him up. Someone holds up a sign saying 'Not my King' and gets arrested. This triggers a whole wave of protests and arrests as free speech slides out the window, until the Met Police chief has to step in and explain to the police like they're five-year-olds that they can't do that, actually, and need to cut that shit out.

But we can't wholly blame the police, because the main pressure to clamp down on protestors actually came from...

The government.

Meanwhile the country goes bat shit fucking insane. In order not to offend the fragile sensibilities of royalists, now so brittle they need to be treated with the same delicate touch normally reserved for unstable nitroglycerin, the UK sees supermarkets lowering the volume of self-serve checkout desks, people's funerals cancelled, vital operations and other medical interventions postponed, Centre Parcs cancelling holidays, FOOD BANKS CLOSING, Nintendo Direct cancelling its live stream in Britain (but not cancelling the release of the recording onto You Tube an hour later because as we all know Queen Elizabeth II was a MASSIVE livestream fan and would have been DEVASTATED to miss it but she was very 'meh' about YouTube), cycle racks being closed, and this unhinged shrieking harridan:

Very normal, lads. Very normal.

Oh and also they cancelled Owain Glyndwr Day so as a Welsh person I am now legally allowed to forcibly ram a daffodil into the urethras of the landed English gentry.

However, the protests grow as the suppression wanes. By the time King Prince Charles comes to Wales, he is met with silent protests, this guy who learned a sentence in Welsh specially for the occasion, and a petition to abolish the Prince of Wales title.

Except government is still shut down, so the petitions are all suspended.

But not to worry! That gives the Maths Mates more time to work on their special mini-budget.

Week Three

More of the same at first, really, but she finally addresses the nation to announce that the Queen was the "rock" on which "modern Britain was built".

Also someone finally spots that the necklace she always wears is a day collar, so that was fun.

BUT THEN

The moment we have all been waiting for, with baited breath.

On the 23rd September, 2022, the mini-budget finally arrives. The golden egg of Kwasi and Liz, their beloved, beautiful child, the crowning glory, the culmination of their economic beliefs and values. They are so proud of it, so sure of it, that they do not even submit it for the approval of the Office for Budget Responsibility. Why should they? This is the moment Kwarteng can finally show the world that he was right; that this is the way to do economics after all; that he alone in his brilliance and genius has reinvented the field and will lead the country to a new era of riches and prosperity.

And the pound does this:

Yikes.

Truss goes into hiding for a day and a half, during which time her aids claim all her relatives have died so she won't have to speak to the press, which is obviously a simply fantastic quality in a Prime Minister. Finally, she resurfaces by doing a series of radio interviews for regional stations around the UK, hoping they'll be easier on her, starting with Radio Leeds. The good journalists of Yorkshire eviscerate her and strew her corpse through Adel Woods. It's downhill from there.

Week Four

One poll puts Labour 33 points ahead of the Tories.

It can be a little difficult to translate polls, because the electoral system is complex, so I asked my journalist friends. They cheerfully informed me that, if translated into a General Election, the Tories would have just 3 seats left.

Except! Of course, naturally, that is me reporting naught but the most extreme result, Tumblrs, dancing upon the bones of my enemies as I chant the rites to make the Tory party die faster. If I were to be fair about this - and I am, of course, a journalist of Integrity and Morals - I would actually give the average poll result. And I am wise and fair to all, ancient rites aside, so I shall.

The average poll result is still 19 points ahead.

Tony Blair's landslide Labour victory in 1999 was 12 points.

Rounding off the day, Labour declare that they are backing a change to a proportional representation voting system in place of the UK’s archaic first past the post system. Funny that.

Anyway, that mini-budget is going poorly. Realising unlimited borrowing rather than tax cuts for the rich is maybe Bad Actually, the Maths Mates decide to get the money for their bail-outs some other way. Can you guess, Tumblrs? Can you guess where they decide to get the money from?

Naturally.

Week Five

In a fascinating little twist, the papers claim Liz banned King Prince Charles from going to the Climate Summit in Egypt. This is interesting for about a billion reasons, not least of which is that the papers seem very angry about this and yet also that it's an unsubstantiated rumour - the phrase "it's understood that _" gets a hell of a workout.

She then does not go herself. Makes sense. They'll probably be mean to her about the fracking.

She then loses the support of the Daily Mail, a paper that five weeks before were ecstatic about her rise to power :( so sad. But why? What made them change their minds?

Well. What else from Truss, but a massive and catastrophic u-turn on the economy?

And she does! The absolute nutter!

Plans to cut the 45p tax rate for those earning upwards of £150,000 were abandoned, as were:

abolishing the planned rise in corporation tax

cutting the basic rate of income tax

the two-year energy bill support plan

scrapping the planned dividend tax hike

VAT-free shopping for international tourists

freezing alcohol duty

easing of IR25 rules for the self-employed

ALL GONE! All gone. The mini-budget is not working so lol jk we'll think of something else, that's how government works, right? The pound promptly implodes further. Of all people, Nadine Dorries is the one to criticise

WE ARE IN A TOPSY TURVEY UPSIDE DOWN WORLD

The Daily Mail still finds a way to say it's all Michael Gove's fault, though.

Anyway, the 5th October dawns bright and beautiful and YouGov polls rural voters:

THIS IS HUUUUUUUUUGE, because farmers just will not fucking stop voting Tory, AND YET. Wowsers. Not just popularity. Voting intention. She might as well have personally infected every farm in the South Downs with foot and mouth disease.

Truss realises her popularity is plummeting and she needs a new audience. She tries to appear down with the kids and declares that she's the only PM to have gone to a comprehensive school.

This is not true. Gordon Brown and Theresa May both did. However, it's certainly true that all three of them became PM by ousting a sitting PM, so there's that I guess.

Week Six

At this point I can start putting in PRECISE DATEs just call ME Robert Peston.

13th October

News reporters start speculating that she'll be done by the end of the month as the first rumoured letter of no confidence reaches us. People realise that her competition for shortest serving PM was a guy who died in office of TB at about the four month mark RIP king sorry about your lungs.

(A reminder - normally, if MPs want to oust a party leader, they must send in 54 letters of no confidence. This makes the 1922 Committee - a bunch of back benchers who preside over this shit - hold a vote of no confidence. A leader who loses gives way - this is very rare. A leader who wins is then immune to another such vote for 12 months, but they almost always crumble within a month or two anyway - this is much more common.)

This is extremely funny, because a newly-elected leader of the party has a 12 month immunity to votes of no confidence, same as people who've won such a vote. Likes charge reblogs cast apparently. MPs are getting desperate.

Pressure mounts. Chancellor Kwasi Kwarteng announces that he is "Not going anywhere."

14th October

Chancellor Kwasi Kwarteng is sacked and blamed for the entire economic mess.

Incredibly, Liz does this without first planning a replacement, so it's several hours before Jeremy Cunt suddenly reappears like the spectre at the fucking feast.

Meanwhile here's Ed Milliband on Twitter

Seven and a half years he waited to retweet that. Seven and a half long years, look, to have the last laugh.

In the end, he still went too soon.

15th October

Deputy PM and also Health Minister Therese Coffey (side note - have they always doubled up in roles like that? Or are there just not enough of them anymore?) announces that she loves antibiotic resistance and dead kids and also breaking laws:

16th October

The Sunday Times calls for Extremely Corrupt Former Grand Vizier Rishi Sunak to take over, and then a General Election so that Labour can take the reins.

The SUNDAY TIMES

Calling for LABOUR

The Sunday Mail tries to stir up support for Ben Wallace taking over, because no one has heard of Ben Wallace so he needs the boost, but then accidentally publish their front page with a different man

In another YouGov poll for the Times, not a single political group, age group, area of the country, gender, or other demographic said that Liz Truss was the right choice for PM

This is the new predicted election graph:

Yikes

17th October

The projected election results are a Labour victory so complete the opposition would be the SNP. Legend suggests Nicola Sturgeon's cackle on finding out was so powerful she accidentally resurrected a witchfinder.

18th October

Meanwhile in the Senedd, Welsh Tory leader Andrew RT Davies, a sort of humanoid boil dressed in ham, tries to accuse placid and gentle First Minister for Wales Mark Drakeford's Labour of being responsible for long ambulance waiting times.

T'was a mistake.

19th October

Oh boy.

Well, first of all, Suella Braverman sends an official email from her private email address, and then promptly leaves the Cabinet at cannonball speeds as though she's seen a brown child about to be given citizenship. Was she quietly fired by Jeremy Cunt? Did she do it deliberately to resign? On her way out, she blames the true source of our problems - the Guardian-reading, tofu-eating Wokerati.

Nigella Lawson spends the day tweeting tofu recipes.

Meanwhile, Graham Brady, the Chair of the 1922 Committee, comes to Liz Truss to inform her that he has in fact now received 54 letters of no confidence. Normally, of course, that would be considered enough to trigger a vote in her leadership; but not now.

However, these are unprecedented times. So he changes the threshold - if half of the Tories send him letters, her immunity will be revoked.

But the thing is, Tumblrs, the thing is...

It is all about to kick off in the most spectacular and catastrophic fireworks since Guy Fawkes had a dream.

Because Ed Milliband, once accused of leading the country to chaos and now riding high on the joy of his well-timed Twitter jab of Some Days Ago, wakes this morning and chooses violence.

He has spotted, of course, that no one likes fracking; even the Tories are against it.

He has also spotted that Liz Truss is very stupid.

So he goes into the House of Commons, and he digs a big pit and covers it over with twigs and leaves so it can't be seen, and he bakes a big cake and he places it in the middle of the twigs, and he sets up a net to fall as well and a big stick of ACME dynamite, and he hammers in little signs everywhere saying CAUTION - TRAP, by which I am of course being metaphorical because what he actually does is table a motion to extend the moratorium on fracking. The signs aren't necessary, really. This trap is easy to avoid.

All Liz Truss has to do, you see, is not use a three-line whip on this vote.

The three-line whip, as you'll all recall, is the highest level of coercion. MPs cannot defy a three-line whip. MPs cannot even abstain on a three-line whip. MPs have two choices on a three-line whip: to vote as they're told, or to be removed from the party. You obey or resign. That's all.

For this reason, it's sometimes called a 'confidence vote', as it is effectively a stand-in for one. The vote is not about the issue at hand - this is now a vote of confidence in your leader.

(He's also laid lesser traps. Years back when fracking was first being heavily discussed, Ed was Labour leader and one of the main figures in those discussions. During today, before it all Kicks The Fuck Off, a Tory stands and challenges him on previous statements about fracking, trying to accuse him of hypocrisy.

He was fucking ready for it.)

Graham Brady pops his head back around the door. He's changed his mind - a third of the party is all that's needed now to trigger a vote of no confidence in Liz Truss. And legend says he's only 17 off.

This is presumably the reason for what comes next.

Liz panics. Liz sees she's desperately unpopular. Liz sees that she has to do something to shore up support; and she sees that her important fracking rule, which her party hates her for, is now being challenged by a former Labour leader, and if he wins (which he will) she'll lose all credibility and maybe they'll take her nice office away and tell her she was a Bad Girl.

And so, with the inevitability of gravity on the now-leaden pound sterling, she makes it a three-line whip, and a confidence vote in her government.

INSTANT CHAOS.

There is uproar! There is rage! There is blinding fury! Tory MPs are standing up in the Commons and snarling and pissing and moaning! No one likes fracking except Jacob Rees Mogg! For TWO HOURS they shriek and scream and gnash their teeth, yelling at Liz Truss, demanding to know why this is happening.

(Legend has it chaos-deity Ed Milliband simply leaned back, put his feet up on the chair in front, and made Christian Wakeford hand-feed him grapes and fan him with a palm leaf, but this is unsubstantiated.)

And then, at 6.55, FIVE MINUTES before voting is ready to begin, the Tory Minister for Climate Graham Stewart stands up and declares that everyone should vote how they want because it's not a confidence vote.

Did I say there was chaos before?

Lol. Lmao, even. Rofl, in fact.

Now Tories leap to their feet and basically all scream one long, unending breath of WHAT-DO-YOU-MEAN-IT'S-NOT-A-CONFIDENCE-VOTE-WHAT-THE-FUCK-IS-HAPPENING-IS-IT-OR-IS-IT-NOT-A-CONFIDENCE-VOTE and so Stewart gets up again and says, right to everyone's faces, "It's not for me to say whether it's a confidence vote or not," which is an even faster and more spectacular u-turn than Truss herself could pull off given that he literally just said it wasn't and did so while being a minister.

And then the voting starts. MPs are now milling about like chickens who've sighted the hawk, clamouring to know if they're going to lose their jobs unless they vote for Satan. The Whips - specifically Chief Whip Wendy Morton and Deputy Chief Whip Craig Whittaker - descend upon them like fucking wargs on the hunt. They don't just spit vitriol and blackmail into MPs ears. They fucking bodily drag people into the right voting lobby. MPs are legitimately screaming. Grown men are crying literal tears. Labour's Chris Bryant reports holding multiple Tory MPs as they sob into his shoulder. Multiple MPs report similar scenes.

And Tories still don't know if this is even a damn confidence vote, or if they should just knock the Chief Whip's teeth out.

And then the Whips, filled with bloodlust and frenzy, suddenly realise that NO ONE IS LISTENING TO US, YOU'RE ALL SUPPOSED TO LISTEN TO US SO WE FEEL POWERFUL -

Cue sudden meeting in a locked room with Liz Truss. For over HALF AN HOUR.

So is it a confidence vote? No one is sure. Deputy PM Therese Coffey thinks so, so in the absence of the Whips she decides physical assault is her job now and is seen by David Linden MP (SNP) physically carrying someone into the voting lobby. Jacob Rees Mogg thinks not and starts yelling "It's not a confidence vote!", to which his colleagues reply, "Fuck off." Meanwhile the Whips have possibly resigned, no one is sure. It is still uncertain if this was a confidence vote.

And Ed Milliband basks in the chaos, playing the fiddle while it all burns around him.

Finally, voting concludes. The Whips reappear to lurk.

The votes are in - the government wins, and fracking will go ahead. But.

32 MPs abstained.

And one of those is Liz Truss.

Which is WILD??!? What possible benefit could she get from that??? No one knows. Everything is uproar again. Guess who else abstained? Well, riveted reader, here's a list with important names highlighted:

Nigel Adams, Gareth Bacon, Siobhan Baillie, Greg Clark, Sir Geoffrey Cox, Tracey Crouch, David Davis, Dame Caroline Dinenage, Nadine Dorries, Philip Dunne, Mark Fletcher, Vicky Ford, Paul Holmes, Alister Jack, Boris Johnson, Gillian Keegan, Kwasi Kwarteng, Robert Largan, Pauline Latham, Mark Logan, Theresa May, Priti Patel, Mark Pawsey, Angela Richardson, Andrew Rosindell, Bob Seely, Alok Sharma, Chris Skidmore, Henry Smith, Ben Wallace, Sir John Whittingdale, and William Wragg.

Kwasi still smarting about that p45, I see.

In any case it then turns out that Liz DID vote, but incompetently, because her voting card didn't read properly, which is actually fair given that she was being screamed at by angry Whips waving Graham Stewart's severed dick and balls around while they demanded power and authority. While she's clearing that up, the press are understandably waiting open-mouthed for comment, but don't worry Liz! Your old pal Jacob Rees Mogg is here to fill in for you!

And thus it is that JRM willingly chooses to go on the live news and calmly confirm to the nation that no one knows if it was a confidence vote or not.

Chaos. Chaos again. Unbridled chaos. The Whips are furious. Everyone is furious. The rebels are now in limbo, unsure if they're now out of a job. Tories are weeping, trying to work out if Rees Mogg WANTS to sink the party. Back bencher Charles Walker MP delivers a frank interview to the press absolutely SHIVERING with rage, like the drummer in a Fleetwood Mac concert. Ex-Lib Dem leader Tim Farron, a bland man known only for the time he himself willingly chose to go on the news and calmly explain that he's a homophobe without provocation, tweets that Liz Truss is a Lib Dem sleeper agent they sent in to destroy the Tories, sparking what is likely to be a whole slew of conspiracy theories by next week. No one knows what is going on. They all decide to sleep on it.

The good folks at Wikipedia ultimately decide to make three separate pages for the UK 2022 government crisis, and to label them with the month "to leave room for another by the end of the year."

Ed Milliband skips all the way home, and treats himself to a bacon sandwich.

20th October

Okay, Liz thinks, the morning after. Okay. Last night was bad. But today will be better.

So first... the vote.

Because there's bad news for Tories who like money and good news for people who like liveable planets - there are problems with the vote. For one, the vote counts are being called into question. Are the results reliable?

For another, the Speaker of the House of Commons calls for an investigation into the reports of, um, assault. So will the result stand?

It's so unclear! And so is that ongoing issue of whether or not the damn thing was a confidence vote. Angry whips say YES, JRM says NO, Downing Street refuses to pick up the phone to the BBC, but does send ITV's Robert Peston a text at 1am to say it was definitely a confidence vote and, unrelatedly, the Whips aren't resigning :)

I think we have found the price paid to keep the Whips.

Meanwhile. Let's see what this has done for Liz's leadership stability!

13 letters of no confidence are confirmed submitted by Sky, 5 of which came in overnight. The 1922 Committee reconvenes the coven to discuss matters. Simultaneously, the One Nation Conservatives reconvene their coven to discuss the same. Presumably there is much "Girl what are YOU doing at the Devil's Sacrament?"-ing and "Same cloak, how embarrassing"-ing. MPs are CLAMOURING for her head. It is VICIOUS. It's like cartoon piranhas in a supervillain's lair; which is highly appropriate, because that's exactly what Tory MPs are.

Graham Brady, head jester of the 1922 Committee, demands to see Liz Truss.

He walks into a room with her, and the doors are closed. Half an hour later, he walks back out of the room.

Ten minutes later, she calls a press conference.

45 days after being appointed, Liz Truss breaks the record, and becomes the shortest-serving British Prime Minister.

[just-here-for-the-moment]

Short story workshop! ✍️✍️✍️ August 2024

Y'all, I am interested in hosting a short story workshop to share my knowledge and my passion for writing and to help other writers who are seeking a place to connect with fellow writers.

However, I am so tired of seeing workshops that cost $200+ for just a few hours! If you're interested in attending a low-cost writing workshop, please read more below the cut...

I'm going to host video-call short story workshops at the very low cost of pay what you can! My suggested donation is around $30.00, but if cost is any kind of an issue, please put a note in the Google form and we can work something out!

8/9/24 Update: Our first workshop will be Sunday, August 11 at 3 p.m. Central US/4 p.m. Eastern US

There are additional times and dates on the Google signup form. Please let me know if you don't see something that works for you. (And rest assured, I'll be adding some European/non-US times soon! Please message me if you're outside of North America and we'll get something set up!) Sign up here at the Google form

FAQs... Who the hell are you? Hi! I'm Claire, I'm very friendly and have been here on Tumblr writing adult fanfiction since 2021. In my first year on Tumblr, I wrote 216,860 words of short story fanfiction. That's a LOT! Fanfic led me to getting back into creative writing, which was a lifelong passion but had been dormant for almost twenty years. Rediscovering writing saved me from one of the deepest depressions I had ever experienced, and I'm so grateful to it and to the other writers I've met over the years for saving my sanity.

What do you know about writing, anyway? A ton! I'm a huge nerd, and when I have a passion for something, I research endlessly and deeply and am always learning something new. Since I started writing fanfic in 2021, I have taken 3 college courses in creative writing, self-published my first book, and I read non-fiction "books about writing" more than I read all other genres combined. (I really love writing!) I'm also "that friend" who knows the difference between affect/effect, vice/vise, they're/there/their, and other really nerdy grammar and spelling and punctuation rules, and I've beta-read for over a dozen other Tumblr authors over the years. After self-publishing in September of 2023, I found that I enjoyed the process so much that I decided to make it my vocation. In March of 2024 I opened a small business to provide self-publishing guidance and author services to other independent authors. I am currently working with my first client to edit and hone a manuscript and query letters for pitching to agents, and I'm also co-editing an anthology of original short stories from some of my favorite Tumblr writers that will debut in January 2025, published through my company.

Why so cheap? I don't have $250 lying around for a one-day writing workshop, and I'm guessing you don't, either.

You write a LOT of smut; do we also have to write "spicy" stories? Nope! Smut is not required - this is a general short story workshop to help you craft any kind of story your heart desires! I love writers and writing, and I'll be your cheerleader no matter what genre of short fiction calls to you and makes your fingers fly!

What do we get out of this? The workshop will consist of two parts. The first will be a 60-minute group video call (time/date TBD), where I will present the basics of short story form, function, and several prompts. Each participant can use one of the prompts, or bring a short story that you've already started. If you would like to get some feedback, I'll ask you to send me your short story draft within 10 days. Two weeks after the first call, I'll host another 60-minute group call, share some of the stories from the group, and provide workshop feedback and guidance to continue your writing! It is totally optional if you want to share your story with the group, but at the very least I hope to provide a welcoming space to talk about writing and to expand your knowledge - you might even make a new writer friend or two!

What if I'm shy/prefer to remain anonymous? I am more than happy to set up a 1:1 workshop with just me and you! Please indicate that on the signup form and we'll set up a time to chat.

Sign up here at the Google form and let's talk writing!

[alphajocklover]

What about a G2S story about greasers? There's so few of those.

Imagine: A very lonely gay guy meets a rockabilly, greaser gang. They take him under their wing, which gay guy appreciates because of his loneliness. But slowly they start changing him, making him just like them.

In the end the lonely gay guy becomes a James Dean, Danny Zuco-wannabe with the gang becoming his new found family.

A lot of people think that Alphas and Betas are a relatively new thing. It makes sense to assume so in a way. Alphas as we know them are pretty new, but that’s only because Alpha culture has changed over time, just like ours. There were Alphas in the old west, in the ancient world, and even going back to the beginning of civilization as we know it. Recently I discovered an old book where someone had written down a number of stories about Alphas from the past. I guess I’m not the first person to document their behavior. One story in particular stuck with me though, so I’ve transcribed it here. Hope you enjoy.

Caleb Sparrow was a complete and utter nerd. An unhip clyde with a reputation for being a bit of a spaz. The kind of goof all the cool cats completely ignored. He was only really good at one thing: not standing out. A part of him hated that he was the way he was, that he was a loser with no friends. But a part of him was grateful. For a secretly queer man living in 1955, he was actually pretty lucky. No one bullied him (mainly because no one noticed him), his secret desires hadn’t been found out, and he had a good future ahead of him. He knew that eventually he’d land a steady job, find a swell gal who he could get along with well enough to marry, and live the traditional life his parents had always wanted of him. A part of him was grateful. But a part of him still hated it all. Hated how lonely he was, how he’d never find someone he’d really love, how his entire life was always going to be a lie. But he was resigned to it. Until… he met an Alpha named Biff.

Biff was everything Caleb wasn’t. He was the hippest greaser in town, with a handsome face, manly muscles, a souped up rag top and a gang of fellow greasers to hang with. Biff had it all. Sure all the squares all said he was bad news, but he didn’t care. He had it made in the shade. He had a different betty with him every night. That’s what made it so weird to everyone when Biff suddenly started being so friendly with Caleb. Caleb didn’t know what to make of it at first, and was pretty sure he was going to end up getting beat, but Biff was… well he was dreamy, so Caleb let himself believe that he really wanted to be his friend. He had no idea that Biff was just looking for a new Beta. Turning Caleb into the perfect Beta took less time than you’d expect. Caleb integrated into the gang with surprising ease, all of the other members treating him like they had been friends for life, and as he began to grow closer to the group and Biff, he began to change.

At first it was a slight change in style and lingo, trying to keep up with his new crew. Then he shot up several inches and began to pack on muscle, which the 19 year old brushed off as an overdue growth spurt. But over time the style changes became more and more drastic and his body grew at an even faster rate. Soon he wasn’t just the new kid, he was the second in command, right after Biff. That’s why everyone started calling him Deuce. Just like everyone else in the gang Deuce was muscular, cool, loved cars and was obsessed with Biff. Deuce eventually even came out to Biff and confessed his love, but Biff didn’t wanna deal with all the issues that came with having a queer beta, so he ‘suggested’ that Deuce was actually a pussy hound like him. Considering how many gals Deuce has played backseat bingo with I think Biff might have overdone it, but just like always he got what he wanted. Another manly, muscular, straight greaser for his gang.

**hey there guys! Never done anything with Greasers before, so it’s probably not as good as my usual stuff, but I had fun with it. Hope you all enjoy. Might revisit the idea of Alphas throughout history sometime**

[kcrabb88]

Quinlan Vos and Obi-Wan Kenobi Are Not Normal About Each Other (A Thesis Statement)

Fandom: Quinlan and Obi-Wan have had sex, but it’s a reach to think they could be in love and/or care deeply about each other in some manner, it was just physical (this is not me saying I don't think they have sex I HELLA do and I've written a lot of smut to prove it, but I've seen wayyyy too many posts that basically say they can only be romantic as Padawans and NEVER as adults and/or were just fooling around as teens and didn't have deep feelings in some way whether they're FWB or romantic partners or whatever you like)

Me: *unrolls my scroll* I'm here to make a POINT as an addendum to this post I made recently.

Look at these little darlings! They just met and Quin's already trusting Obi-Wan, and Obi-Wan WANTS Quin to trust him. In another panel from this same comic, Quin helps Obi-Wan with his anxiety and it's very sweet.

Quin's been struggling with the dark side while undercover, and everyone thinks he's really truly fallen and can't be brought back except for Aayla, Tholme, and, YOU GUESSED IT! Obi-Wan. He goes looking for Quinlan on his own and finds him and they chat. Plus, look at this flashback of these little nerds flirting. Quin literally falls into the river and almost dies trying to flirt with Obi-Wan.

What do I even say about this panel??? Look at them!! Look at Quin trusting Obi-Wan with the dark parts of himself and Obi-Wan believing in him? Look at that hand clasp? Like shut up I can't take it.

Obi-Wan refusing to leave Quinlan behind and Quinlan, stubborn Quinlan, listening to him.

Their banter here shows how well they know and play off each other and that joke in the last panel SENDS ME.

This is from the new comic that came out in September, and this is just ONE instance of several of Quinlan mentioning Obi-Wan, who only appears in this comic via a psychometric vision, but Quin keeps bringing him up anyways.

I mean this is. THIS is what made me WANT to know more about Quinlan in the first place! It's not in this gif, but the way Obi-Wan smiles in this scene? The way his eyes light UP? That's love, babey.

I could literally paste so much stuff from Dark Disciple, which to me has always been a QuinObi book in addition to Vostress. Quinlan has fallen (pretty much without understanding he has because he so badly wants to uncover Sidious) and missing his check-ins with Obi-Wan, but Obi-Wan keeps going back to their bar over and over again and he's been waiting for like, two hours at this point when Ventress comes in.

"Not him." Okay, buddy. Okay. Obi-Wan has like three panic attacks and outright defies his fellow council members at various points through this book because he believes so hard in Quinlan. He is INSISTENT that Quinlan can be brought back to the light.

These two pages made me SOB.

"She saved Quinlan" in italics. Not just his life, but his spirit. Those italics speak for themselves. And "Vos knew he could never repay Kenobi for that, but he has the rest of his life to try." Do ya, Quin? The rest of your life, huh?

Anyhow, truly, this is just me scratching the surface as I was limited by only being able to use 10 photos in a post. I’m leaving out sooo many other examples. You don't have to ship them! But these guys care a lot about each other and saying that it's just, impossible for them to have romantic feelings on posts or fics where the creator is, indeed, shipping them is ... weird. So is trying to overlay other ships onto specifically QuinObi content.

This has been a PSA.

[theineffablesociety]

I'd like to plan a Good Omens meetup for Saturday October 19th, 2024. Poll below!

Edit: If you're looking for the Discord link, please message me!

We're currently looking at a hotel in Langhorne, PA that has a good bit of space. Just need to see about availability and cost.

For our immunocompromised and vulnerable fellow fans who plan to attend, we're going to include a masking policy in our event spaces and hallway/foyer outside those rooms. We'll have extras available.

All ages welcome; under 18 must attend with a guardian.

-

Start original message:

The Ineffable Society Meetup is a thought that's brewed in my brain since June 2023 when a bunch of local GO fans chanced to meet for the first time at the King of Prussia PA screening of series 2 episode 1 and 2.

It is time to stop brewing and let others contribute.

Here's my initial thoughts:

I'm willing to organize but not alone. We'll need to work together.

I live near Philadelphia, PA so this is the area I'm willing to do what needs doing primarily in Eastern PA, Central NJ, surrounding areas therein.

I'd want everyone attending to be 18 or older, please. I encourage those 17 and under to organize something together!

Taking suggestions for type of venues to host, think like a family reunion or larger.

I'm not interested in handling money, so would seek at least 2 people to oversee financials if that comes into play. (Finances might be needed to cover renting a space, any printed materials, little swag gifts.)

As mentioned, Saturday October 19th. Because it's close to the Earth's Birthday. :3

Afternoon through evening could be good. Maybe a 3 hour window on the small end; most of the day on the larger end. Will depend on location and on how many helpers step up.

Good Omens related fun: encouraging cosplay, script book readings, discussions, games, swaps. Maybe screening an episode together (there's copyright law to contend with here though). Depending on how much time we have together and space. Simplest plan would be an informal Good Omens afternoon mixer type.

If fewer than 12 people are interested:

We could just meetup at a restaurant that has a function room! (Not super ideal for allergies, as there's probably nowhere that's good for everyone. But does it in a pinch. And would probably not be a big up-front cost. Often there's a small room fee and then the assumption everyone will eat.)

If more than 12 up to 40 people are interested:

We might consider renting some conference rooms at a small hotel. (That does make it easier for people to find accommodations: already there! At a hotel! Downside is this will require chipping in.)

Any more than 40 people and uhhh... We'll figure it out.

WHAT I NEED TO KNOW FROM YOU

There will be more questions to follow, but most important one is below.

Please answer YES if you are:

A Good Omens fan

18 or older

In the Eastern PA to Central NJ area

Or are otherwise willing, able, and interested to go there

For transparency. A little about me:

I'm North (SeedsOfWinter). They/he.

Over the past two and a half decades, I've organized or been a member of organizations that planned meetups, game nights, reunions, and nerd events for friends and strangers alike.

I've been a Good Omens fan since June 2019. I run @rareomens. I am a mod for @ineffableeraszine and @bildadzine. I was a mod for the Our Side Zines, Pin Me Up 2, and many more. I was a founding admin for the LGBTQIA+ Fans of Good Omens groups.

I've been part of convention presentations for Good Omens at The Ineffable Con (virtual) and DragonCon (in-person, Atlanta GA). I love to organize fan photoshoots and meetups.

I know that any attempt at gathering people requires a team to make it happen; and that there's pitfalls and perils to all of it, especially when you're dealing with a bunch of possible strangers meeting for the first time! But the end result (you all getting a chance to connect together as fans) is feeling pretty worth it.

[the-spaced-out-ace]

okay okay hear me out. hatchetfield/ever after high au

i maaaaaayyy have been thinking about this since. the day i saw abstinence camp. in my defense dexven and lautski are the same ship and nobody likes either of these things more than me (/j) so like. rundown of ideas i had (and one piece of inspo from a gc i'm in)

Stephanie Lauter, daughter of the Evil King: Yeah, I'm just fully reusing Raven's backstory here. Steph's born into wickedness and expected to one day inherit her father's throne and oppress her people and possibly curse the future Snow White. Which earns her respectful fear from her fellow "evil" peers, fearful respect from most of her classmates, and dread from herself, because she doesn't want to be anything like her dad, for better or for worse, even if it means risking going poof. Doesn't really help she's just not a good student in the classes assigned to her and her father keeps telling her she'll be a terrible Evil Queen anyway. Would absolutely prefer to write her own destiny. Her current plans involve doing fuck-all as an adult.

Peter Spankoffski, son of one of the Generic Charming Families: More specifically, the ones from Beauty and the Beast. One problem. He wasn't exactly planned. His big brother has already lived out being the beast and a noble lady named Jenny broke Ted's curse yeeeeaaarrrs ago, so Pete's already seen what should be his story play out in real time. And given the assumption that Ted and Jenny's kid would take on one of their roles, Pete's not sure he even has a destiny. Pretty much ostracized by most of his peers for so obviously not having a destiny. He's the only non-villian not inherently scared of Steph, and when they talk it's all like "god, you're so lucky your story isn't a shitshow" "at least you have a story" and eventually they kinda further break destiny by dating because they are literally just Raven and Dexter in another font.

Ruth Fleming, daughter of The Mad Hatter: @mythuzalasheir3 suggested this one to me and I was so inclined to agree. Ruth is so Wonderlandian to me. She's theatrical, she's eccentric and not willing to turn it down, will just say what's on her mind as she sees it. Taking a bit from the books canon, she does sorta resent Steph at first for her father going off-book and poisoning Wonderlandian magic, but after Pete urges her to actually talk to her as they start hanging out more, she sees Steph isn't as scary as she thought and very quickly gets comfortable turning up her madness and speaking Riddlish around her like she does with her other friends. Speaking of which.

Richie Lipschitz, son of the Wizard of Oz: Yes. I really am making Pete the odd one out. Ruth is Wonderlandian, Richie is an (honorary) Ozian. Sue me. This basically stems from how Richie was in charge of taping the prank in the Waylons/putting on the music, so knowing he has special effects know-how, he is going to have a blast doing the hologram head thing in the Emerald City for a few decades. He also plans on introducing pop culture stuff to Oz, too, not just more science. Nerd. I think he's iconic for it.

(Side note: neither Ruth nor Richie can believe that they're just casually best friends with a prince, even though Pete really doesn't want it to be a big deal).

Grace Chasity, daughter of the Temple Woman from The Little Mermaid: Right. History time. If you're not familiar with the original version of TLM, after the mermaid brings the prince back to shore, a girl from a Christian monastery finds the prince, and he believes she saved him instead of the mermaid. And also she and the prince are married by the end. I chose this fully because she's very proud of the fact she already has an immortal soul, and doesn't have to do anything for a happily ever after other than be in the right place at the right time. She does not give a damn about who her prince is as long as they stick to the script. Basically, she's a Royal out of necessity more than anything.

Max Jagerman, son of another Charming Clan: More specifically, he's destined to be the Rapunzel's prince. He's in with Steph because he thinks it's a good idea to be on the good side of all royals in his class. But not Storiless Spankoffski. He does NOT fraternize with people whose existence could poof away a whole story. For as much as he tries to fit the example of Perfect Royals Accepting Their Destiny, he does still have a target of affection not in his story: Grace. Being much more stereotypically Royal than him, she keeps rejecting him due to not being interested and not even part of his story. Doesn't stop him from trying.

The Lords in Black, the heads of Ever After High: Everyone has a destiny. They're here to run the school and enforce them, and also dictate the destinies of the more ambiguous cases like Charming Number Twenty-Seven or "how do we find a replacement for a character who is dead." They say there's a spider in the basement but don't even worry about it, they'll take care of it eventually.

Webby, the Weaver in the Basement: Basically taking the place of Giles Grimm, her brothers have let her have less and less involvement with destinies over the years, so she's spinning up happier endings that hopefully won't go poof in solitude. Would definitely encourage Steph to follow her heart instead of her destiny.

Henery Hidgens as the Magic Botany teacher, and also former Jack of Jack the Giant Slayer fame: man I just think this would be funny

[traningdummy]

The Goth and The Jock

Dio X Male Reader

Dio was an outcast in college, always talking about how everything was bad. He was also a satanist who would always talk about it, usually when talking to his friends. Overall, a pretty weird guy for college.

Y/n on the other hand was the usual movie jock who everyone knew. He had friends all over campus, from his fellow jocks to the nerds of college. Everyone seemed to love him, most even tried to date him.

But he had his eyes on one man, the older goth man, Dio. He didn’t know why he was attracted to the man, was it his body, face, bravado? He couldn't say, maybe he was in love with just Dio as a man.

Whatever it was, Y/n couldn’t stop thinking of Dio. In all of his classes he would daydream about the man, at practice he would hope Dio would go to his games. He felt like a hopeless romantic, but he was fine with it.

Dio knew Y/n from people around the campus, they would always talk about him and his game winning stunts. Yet he never saw the man in person, maybe because he usually skipped classes to get high or smoke cigarettes with his friends.

Y/n intrigued Dio, enough so that he actually went to his classes for a while. He would try to see if he could find the jock but no luck, not in any of his classes, never saw him in the halls, and he was not going to ask when Y/n had practice.

His ego was too high for that, so he decided to find out by himself. So every morning he would get up early and head to the gym, looking for Y/n but got nothing. Then after school he would go back to the gym, yet still he couldn’t find him.

Yet his luck would lead him to finding Y/n, but in the worst way possible.

•••

It was lunch, Y/n decided to eat the campus’s lunch so he went to the cafeteria. As he was getting food, Dio came in, getting cravings after smoking some weed with his friends.

“Fuck, that sounds good.” He muttered to himself before walking to get in line, yet as he walked to the line Y/n was daydreaming and ran into him.

Food hit his black leather jacket, staining his white undershirt. Y/n gasped and the lunch room went silent. “Shit, sorry.” He mumbled and tried to clean off Dio’s jacket, he sighed and took off his jacket.

“It’s fine, don’t worry about it.” He said nonchalantly, yet Y/n was freaking out internally but tried to seem chill. “Say, aren’t you Y/n? The jock everyone talks about?” Dio asked and he nodded, everyone still staring at the two hoping for a fight.

“Yeah, are you Dio?” Y/n asked and the other man nodded.

“Man, the rumors don’t do you justice, you’re a lot hotter than they say. Here’s my number.” He said and wrote it down on Y/n’s wrist, the jock was too starstruck to even say anything so he just nodded. “Call me.” He whispered before getting into line.

After that encounter everyone began to assume the two were dating, to which Y/n was embarrassed while Dio could care less. Soon the two began to meet up, usually in the library or in one of their dorms.

Dio’s dorm reeked of weed and cigarette smoke, yet he would open his window to try and fan out the smell so Y/n’s nose wouldn’t hurt. He was grateful for it, but overall Dio’s dorm was just like he expected. His room was filled with books, most about religions, others were random things he couldn’t describe besides random.

Y/n’s room was almost the exact opposite, it always smelt of his favorite scent. His whole dorm radiated glee, which Dio enjoyed as his dorm seemed glum. Y/n’s room was filled with his accomplishments, from trophies to little medals of participation.

“Cute, it’s like you crave validation.” Dio noted and Y/n nodded, sitting down on his bed.

“Yeah, you know parents, they never give you any validation or comfort so, you look for it in other ways.” He remarked and the goth nodded, sitting down next to the jock.

“I can see that, I bet you can also see why I am the way I am.” Dio said and Y/n shook his head. “Well, my parents were what you consider the American dream. Perfect jobs, perfect home, a perfect family. But guess who came in and fucked it up.” He said and pointed to himself, Y/n laughed and nodded.

“It’s very obvious, but you have the most character.” He remarked and Dio smiled, falling back on the bed. Seeing the poster of Y/n’s favorite band on the ceiling.

“Yep, the unusual kid is usually born in the perfect family. Yet, it was my father who showed me this stuff. That is one thing I will commend them for.” He said and Y/n nodded, laying down next to Dio.

Dio looked over to Y/n, the sunset light hitting his face making him look like a dream. He never thought he would love a jock, yet here he is, falling for one. Y/n looked over to see Dio’s brown eyes staring at him, he smiled and turned to him.

“You look like you’ve seen an angel.” Y/n said and Dio nodded.

“Because I’m looking at one.” He said before holding Y/n’s face in his hands, Dio looked at him and got a nod. He leaned in and kissed the jock, he smiled and they kept kissing.

After that day they would usually be seen together, around the campus, Dio waiting for Y/n to finish practice, Y/n picking up Dio after a smoke session. They truly loved each other, and people could tell.

•••

“Y/n, do you think I’m cool?” Dio asked as he held Y/n close to his chest.

“Yeah, you’re the coolest guy I’ve met and I’ve met a lot of cool people.” Y/n responded, looking up to his boyfriend. Dio looked down and nodded, a smile on his face before he kissed the jock.

“Good, I better be.” He said and held the jock closer to him, he laughed and they basked in each other’s presence.

The two felt like the perfect pair, Dio’s dark and sarcastic humor contrasting Y/n’s bright and sweet tone. But as their relationship grew, the closer they began to thirst for each other.

Y/n would always want to see Dio naked, on his bed all spread out. Dio thinking the same, Y/n covered with hickeys, breathing fast, face red. So they decided to plan for it, both agreeing on a date.

•••

“Alright, so you want to do it after finals or before?” Y/n asked, looking through a calendar. Dio paced around Y/n’s room, trying to think about it.

“I think we should do it after, you know sex is a good way to relieve stress.” He remarked and his boyfriend nodded, getting a marker and circled the date.

“It’s official, now let’s get some sleep. We have finals to study for.” Y/n said and Dio groaned before falling into his arms, he sighed in content as he pushed his face against Y/n’s pecs.

“You know, you make the perfect pillow.” Dio said and Y/n laughed before pulling a blanket over them both.

“I know, you are always sleeping on me.” He said and the goth nodded, soon the two fell asleep in each other's hold.

Soon finals began and the two, by two mostly Y/n, were giving it their all. Studying hard and hoping to pass, and as the week passed Y/n forgot what was in store for him after the week was over.

But Dio always remembered, before he would leave his house he could cross off a day. Each day for the week he crossed off the day, till it was the day and he was excited.

•••

“Jesus, I thought I was going to have a meltdown.” Y/n complained as he and Dio walked to his dorm.

“I wouldn’t know, I got someone to take mine for me.” Dio said and his boyfriend scoffed, and opened the door for him. When he walked in Dio smiled seeing Y/n’s room was cleaner than usual.

“Yeah, I know. Wow, I cleaned my room!” Y/n said trying to mimic Dio’s voice and he laughed.

“Nice impression, do you remember what today is?” He asked, pushing Y/n against the couch. His face was red as Dio straddled on him.

“Is it our anniversary?” He questioned and the goth sighed before kissing the jock. It soon turned from love filled to lust filled, Dio began to take off Y/n’s clothes and he did the same.

Soon they were both naked, Y/n and Dio’s cocks rubbing against each other causing the two to moan and groan. Dio decided to take the lead and kissed all over Y/n’s neck, sucking and biting to leave marks all over his neck and collarbone.

“Shit Dio, I didn’t think you were the possessive type.” Y/n chuckled but groaned when Dio took his cock in his hands.

“Have to show that you belong with me.” He whispered into the jock's ear, and he began to jerk off Y/n. Going slowly at first to hear his boyfriend’s moans of his name.

“Dio, please.” He whimpered and Dio smiled, deciding to give into the whimpers and go faster. Y/n kept moaning and whimpering till he felt the knot in his stomach start to break.

But Dio stopped, letting go of his cock. Before he could complain he felt two wet fingers enter him, he gasped and his head fell on Dio’s shoulder. “D-Dio.” He whispered but was shushed by the goth.

“It’s going to be okay baby, just relax for me.” Dio said and Y/n nodded, soon getting relaxed as his fingers stretched him out. Soon he was propped against the back of the couch, Dio behind him ready to insert himself. “Are you ready?” Dio asked Y/n.

“Yes, please!” He whined and took a sharp inhale when Dio inserted his cock into him. He waited till Y/n moved his hips to start slowly thrusting, kissing all over his back and leaving even more marks.

He soon began to thrust faster and harder, hitting a bundle of nerves in Y/n that made him moan loudly. So Dio kept hitting that spot, making sure his boyfriend was satisfied. Soon, without warning, Y/n came all over his and Dio’s bodies.

“S-Shit, sorry.” Y/n whimpered but Dio kissed him softly, silencing him as he kept going.

“It’s fine baby.” He whispered and kept going, loving to see tears leave Y/n’s eyes from overstimulation. Soon, thankfully, he started to feel his release and kept thrusting into him. “I’m so close, can you hold on a little longer?” Dio asked and Y/n nodded rapidly.

Before he could cum inside of Y/n he pulled out, and came on their bodies as the jock under him had done before. He sighed and fell onto his boyfriend, who was trying to regain his breath.

“Dio?” He questioned and the both looked up, seeing Y/n’s bright smile which made him warm. “You want to shower?” He asked and Dio nodded, so Y/n, with some new found strength, lifted him and took him to the bathroom.

“Jesus.” Dio muttered and pulled himself against Y/n, before hearing the bathtub getting filled up. Y/n played with his boyfriend’s hair, and he enjoyed it as he played with it.

•••

The next morning, Y/n was slightly limping at practice. People kept asking about the hickeys on his neck, he was embarrassed. But Dio was proud of it, as he watched his boyfriend getting questioned left and right.

[marthawrites]

Hello friends! My name is Martha and I'm a wife, mom, and nerd about a whole lot of things. I'm officially in my 30s, a libra sun, aries moon, and leo rising.

• Aemond Targaryen simp

• Cryptid and monster lover

• Wannabe writer

Archived here will be an assortment of writing resources I find useful, fandom stuff, fandom writing, (maybe one day) horror writings, and things I generally enjoy. So, a hodgepodge! I try to tag most things - look in my search bar! Followers better be 18+ due to adult content on this blog because I am gross and shameless.

Requests OPEN for Rhaenyra Targaryen (wlw) and Harwin Strong (fem reader)

Check out my tag #other peoples writing for all the fics I've read and LOVED ♥ Huge shout out to all the wonderful, talented, and unhinged writers on this platform! MWAH!

Masterlist beneath the line! 

Any and all errors and mistakes are my own. I do not use a beta reader. All of these fics, unless otherwise stated, are non-descript female readers. All of these fics are based on my own interpretations of characters and events from the show, House of the Dragon, and the book, Fire and Blood. Any likeness or similarities to other author's fics is unintentional. I am open to private constructive criticism as I believe there is always room for improvement. Each fic is marked with the month and year that it was completed.

Aemond Targaryen:

One shots:

12/ 22 Knees:  (aemond x wife 18+) during a dinner you witness a Lannister relentlessly flirting with a young lady who’s clearly uncomfortable. Taking matters into your own hands, you begin flirting with him to steal his attention away. Aemond, your husband, only plays along for so long before he dismisses both of you and takes things into his own hands.

12/22 Greed: (aemond x wife 18+) Aemond just really likes eating his wife, even when there’s a servant knocking on their door to wake them up to get ready for a mid-morning event.

12/22 A Surprise in the Library: (aemond x wife 18+) Aemond’s wife surprises him with something that the morning’s kitchen staff was talking about. So much for peaceful studying in the library!

1/23 Darkened Corridors: (aemond x fem reader 18+) After avoiding Aemond for what he deems too long, he finds you to remind you what you’ve been missing out on.

1/23 A Lady’s Thrill: (aemond x wife 18+) A stressed Aemond returns late and his lady wife helps him de-stress.

5/23 Teaching A Dragon New Tricks: (aemond x fem reader 18+) You and Prince Aemond have been giving each other eyes for some time now, and he finally makes the first move. After that, you feel comfortable showing him a few things. His drive for knowledge extends beyond books.

6/23 A Dragonkeeper's Secret: (aemond x fem reader 18+) After being disappointed by a fellow dragonkeeper, an event in the dragonpit makes you think: perhaps not all men are disappointing.

6/23 Leather and Silver: (aemond x wife reader 18+) There's something about your prince husband's belt that successfully drives you mad with lust.

7/23 Only A Scratch: (aemond x fem reader 18+) Aemond requests you, a healer who has tended to his wounds before, to accompany him on a trip to Duskendale.

10/23 Summer's End, Autumn's Beginning: (modern aemond x fem reader 18+) A chance encounter with Aemond leads to a whirlwind of emotions. Over the next few months you both fail, in yourselves and in the relationship, and learn from the mistakes.

10/23 To Break The Tension: (modern aemond x fem reader 18+) You and Aemond have a no strings attached relationship. He has a surprise for you and you are more than excited to go see what it is.

12/23 Morning Lovebites Lead To Sweet Dreams: (aemond x wife reader 18+) You and Aemond share a morning bath and the lingering sensations last with you all day. When he returns to your marriage chambers later than usual, you're sad you might sleep through his return. Once in for the night, however, he makes up for it.

1/24 Shadows, Beastsong, and Dragonblood: (aemond x niece reader 18+) Growing up you and your uncle Aemond always shared a special kinship. As you grew older, tension between your family and his rose. Moving to Dragonstone led to long years of not seeing each other. When you and your mother visited her father, King Viserys, yours and Aemond's relationship changed. It changed further, years later, upon your final visit to the capitol.

1/24 Red Lions and Hidden Dragons: (unnamed male x Lannister!fem reader & aemond x Lannister!fem reader 18+) Close kin to Jason and Tyland Lannister, you arrive to King's Landing with a party of fellow lions to celebrate the birth of Prince Maelor Targaryen. You weren't expecting to catch Prince Aemond's eye, but once you do, neither of you can forget it.

3/24 "Vok" (Perfect): (aemond targaryen x sister reader 18+) You and Aemond pledged to each other long ago. Tonight, beneath the blanket of darkness, you revel in each other's adoration.

6/24 Bloodlust: (aemond targaryen x wife reader 18+) Aemond, unable to leave you behind in King's Landing on his way to Rook's Rest, returns to you after a successful scouting mission.

Mini Series:

3/23 (pt 1) Pretty Girl: (modern aemond x fem reader 18+) There's been some weird stuff happening in the woods and your boss buys top of the line security cameras. You definitely weren't expecting to hit it off so well with the tech guy who is much more than a tech guy.

4/23 (pt 2) A Game of Chase: (modern aemond x fem reader 18+) You and your best friend go out to a local event. While there, Aemond, surprisingly, makes an appearance. With quick wit you pretend like it's your first time meeting. Equally quick and curious, he plays along. A game of chase ends up with some unexpected aftershocks.

3/23 (pt 1) Midnight Passage: (aemond x fem reader 18+) Despite the Prince Regent seeing to his royal duties, Aemond's lover is insatiable and seeks to find him late into the night.

4/23 (pt 2) Beneath the Prince Regent: (aemond x fem reader 18+) After your little disturbance in the Prince Regent's study, Aemond finally comes to bed.

7/23 (pt 1) After The Closing Shift: (modern aemond targaryen x fem reader 18+) You and Aemond have been best friends for years. The time is finally right for him to admit his true feelings. In the process of doing so, your cheating ex appears back in the picture. Unexpected events follow.

8/23 (pt 2) After The Study Session: (modern aemond targaryen x fem reader 18+) Through the chaos of college and work, yours and Aemond's friendship continues to shift in a new direction. Jason can't seem to accept he's lost you. You and Aemond take matters into your hands to make sure he knows it.

10/23 (pt 1) Summer's End, Autumn's Beginning: (modern aemond x fem reader 18+) A chance encounter with Aemond leads to a whirlwind of emotions. Over the next few months you both fail, in yourselves and in the relationship, and learn from the mistakes.

5/24 (pt 2) Between the Covers: (modern aemond x fem reader 18+) During a cozy night in at your place, Aemond discovers your new taste for “literature”. Upon confronting you about it he makes a deal. Part of you wants to say no… but, you ultimately agree to his terms.

Series: On Hiatus

1/23 The Arbor and the Dragon: Chapter one, Betrothed :  A realm upon the brink of war. Alicent reaches out to your father, Lord Redwyne, to marry Aemond Targaryen to you. If the union officiates, the green Targaryens will receive the aid of Lord Redwyne’s fleet. You sail to King’s Landing to meet the young prince, to weigh if this is a marriage you truly want.

2/23 The Arbor and the Dragon: Chapter two, Discovery :  After the official betrothal, you learn more about Aemond with each passing day. You're unsure to be scared or excited with these discoveries, but he always leaves you wanting more.

2/23 The Arbor and the Dragon: Chapter three, Experience : (18+) As promised, Aemond takes you for another ride on Vhagar. This time he shows you a hidden place that he’s always loved. New experiences unfold.

6/23 The Arbor and the Dragon: Chapter four, Moonlight: Tension around the Red Keep grows. Rumors begin spreading about yours and Aemond's time spent together. Jane, your best friend and lady-in-waiting, reminds you of your favorite summer festival back home. You write Aemond a letter in secret and request his company at the beach. Emotions are high and promises are made.

Daemon Targaryen and Rhaenyra Targaryen:

Mini Series:

12/22 (pt 1) A Gift for the Queen:  (daemon x rhaenyra x fem reader 18+) It’s Rhaenyra’s birthday eve and Daemon surprises her with an unexpected gift.

5/23 (pt 2) The Gift That Keeps Giving: (daemon x rhaenyra x fem reader 18+) You've happily stayed with Daemon and Rhaenyra since her birthday. They have a little game up their sleeve to play with you.

5/24 (pt 3) The Post-Flying Gift: (daemon x rhaenyra x fem reader) A rare fully sunny day beckons Daemon and Rhaenyra to fly their dragons above Dragonstone for hours. You are more than happy to watch them in flight. When they return, their dragonblood runs hot.

Daemon Targaryen:

One Shots:

6/23 Punishment: (daemon x poc wife reader 18+) Just because you're in the honeymoon phase with the Rogue Prince doesn't mean you can escape a proper punishment for disrespect.

8/23 A Day in the Life: (modern daemon x fem reader 18+) It's barely dawn and you want to have a little fun with Daemon before work. Your job unexpectedly calls and plans change. Flirty and risque texts on the clock leads to him picking you up in both your favorite car.

9/23 Sand and Sky: (daemon x poc fem reader 18+) Upon arriving to King's Landing with your cousin, Criston Cole, you meet Daemon Targaryen. Little time passes before desire of the flesh overtake both of you.

9/23 The Night's Conquest: (daemon x fem reader 18+) It's Daemon's last night in King's Landing and he seeks one final comfort at the Blue Pearl.

6/24 Devour: (daemon x wife reader 18+) The early days of your moon's blood are always the worst. During your suffering, your husband, the Rogue Prince, takes it upon himself to help ease you.

Rhaenyra Targaryen:

One shots:

9/23 Honeyed Promises: (rhaenyra x fem reader 18+) While visiting your great uncle, Lyman Beesbury, at King's Landing, you weren't expecting secondhand stress to affect your lord husband so. Princess Rhaenyra takes notice and is happy to steal moments away with you.

2/24 A Not So Hidden Secret: (modern rhaenyra x fem reader 18+) Rhaenyra discovers something in the bedroom that you, admittedly, forgot about, but didn't want her to know about!

3/24 Beneath the Blooming Branches: (rhaenyra x fem reader) Spring has officially sprung. You and Rhaenyra enjoy a quiet afternoon strolling and picnicking in the gardens.

3/24 A Tale of Two Moons: (rhaenyra x fem reader) At the end of a long day Rhaenyra shares a tale with you, and then offers to share more.

Harwin Strong:

One shots:

12/23 Harrenhal Butterflies: (modern harwin x fem reader 18+) Sparks flew between you and Harwin before slinking off together during a work dinner, and they continue to fly afterwards. Unprompted, you both slink off together once again during an elective work trip to Harrenhal. Tension ends up breaking in a most unexpected place.

2/24 Matinee Delight: (modern harwin x fem reader 18+) While on a cinema date, the movie ends up being something you don't like. You try to talk your boyfriend, Harwin, into bailing early for something more fun.

Harwin Strong and Rhaenyra Targaryen

8/24 A Shared Bed: (harwin x betrothed fem reader x rhaenyra 18+) Harwin gets into an arranged marriage to stop the rumors about him and Rhaenyra. He really likes his betrothed but he loves Rhaenyra. He tells his betrothed, "I can't choose between you and her." She says, "I don't want you to choose. I want in, the bed is large enough."

Helaena Targaryen

One shots:

6/24 Visions in the Garden: (helaena and kids) After breakfast, Helaena takes her twins for a walk through the royal garden.

[zoerocksand1]

Shout out to my fellow aros, aces, aroaces, and anyone else on the aspectrum:

here are some aspec book recommendations, from both an aroace and a bookseller haha!

Dear Wendy by Ann Zhao

Loveless by Alice Oseman

Bloom into You by Nakatani Nio

I Want to be a Wall by Honami Shirono

Is Love the Answer? by Uta Isaki

Aces Wild: a Heist by Amanda DeWitt

Common Bonds: a Speculative Aromantic Anthology by Claudie Arseneault (Editor)

Being Ace: An Anthology of Queer, Trans, Femme, and Disabled Stories of Asexual Love and Connection by Madeline Dyer (Editor)

How to Be Ace: A Memoir of Growing Up Asexual by Rebecca Burgess (not pictured)

Ace: What Asexuality Reveals about Desire, Society and the Meaning of Sex by Angela Chen (not pictured)

and-

Gravity Falls Journal 3 by Alex Hirsch, because we all agree that Ford is aspec, right?? I know a lot of us agree on that at least, so yah, he's one of us

(also mini shoutout to the Owl House's Lilith Clawthorne, my beloved aroace nerd witch 🐦‍⬛🦉 )

🏳️‍🌈.🏳️‍🌈.🏳️‍🌈.🏳️‍🌈.🏳️‍🌈.🏳️‍🌈.🏳️‍🌈

also, my aspec OCs:

Eros: panromantic asexual

Mari: demiromantic asexual

William: aroace

Angie: aromatic asexual (but she doesn't use the term aroace)

Now, go forth, and READ, my friends!! :D

[kaylinalexanderbooks]

Writeblr Questionnaire

Thanks @illarian-rambling here, @paeliae-occasionally here, @willtheweaver here, @honeybewrites here, @urnumber1star here,

And @leahnardo-da-veggie here!

About You:

When did you start writing?

Genuinely I'm not sure, but I do have physical evidence that it's been a while. The first story I wrote was called "In the Dark." I was at the age where I drew several pictures with one color of marker with stick figures and my mom wrote the words for me. I'd say preschool-aged. I think I was three.

Are the genres/themes you enjoy reading different from the ones you write?

I am a person with a huge bias toward fantasy in the things I write and consume. However, I'm not picky with genres, it just happens to be a pattern. I really do love plenty of realistic fiction books. It just so happens that I have exactly one realistic fiction story in my WIP ideas. One. And even then, it needed a gimmick to be interesting for me to write. I have no interest in writing realistic fiction other than that. But I really do love plenty of realistic fiction books!

I want to write a mystery one day, but it'll have to be a fantasy mystery. I do love plenty of realistic fiction mystery books and shows and stuff. I could never write historical fiction, although that isn't a frequented genre to begin with.

Theme-wise, I couldn't say. I don't really care.

Is there an author (or just a fellow writer!) you want to emulate, or one to whom you’re often compared?

Nope. I think people will make their own comparisons, but there's no one in particular I am trying to emulate. I'm just me.

Can you tell me a little about your writing space(s)? (Room, coffee shop, desk, etc.)

Sometimes I just write on the couch or at a random place at school, but I've been going to my desk a lot more. It's just in my room, I'm on a swivel chair, and my laptop is on top of it. Nothing special.

What’s your most effective way to muster up some muse?

Read my old writing or my notes! I see stuff I forgot about or I get ideas from the details. Occasionally I'll check out a video or something if I'm truly stuck.

Did the place(s) you grew up in influence the people and places you write about?

Uh, yes. Why do you think I set the "real world" in a middle-class intermediate school in the greater Houston area on a six-lane FM road with a Sonic, Walgreens, and apartment complex nearby? It's a lot easier to describe things that way. Everywhere else I have to make up a floor plan for interiors and use Google Maps for the surrounding scenery.

Are there any recurring themes in your writing, and if so, do they surprise you at all?

A lot of queer and neurodivergent people. No, that does not surprise me. It me. It accident.

Friends-to-lovers is my most common romantic relationship, but there's also a lot of platonic and queerplatonic relationships.

Interpersonal relationships in general are huge themes of mine and appear in almost everything I write.

Since I write YA, there's a lot of coming of age.

None surprise me.

Your Characters:

Would you please tell me about your current favorite character? (Current WIP, past WIP, never used, etc.)

Oof that's hard. For TSP... I love talking about Carmen. She's such an asshole, but she's super interesting. I want to put her under a microscope and study her. She's a character I'm constantly thinking about. I like seeing why she does the things she does. She's developed into a character I originally didn't think much about, and now I can't stop! She's also funny. She doesn't mean to be, but she's so high-strung and angry that she is fun to write for.

For SOTL, it's Tierney. I have one chapter with him, but that doesn't matter. He's amazing and I love talking about him. He's a mess. He's a nerd. He's awkward. I love him.

Which of your characters do you think you’d be friends with in real life?

Well, the characters closest to my age are Liam and George, and I think I'd be friends with them! Liam may occasionally get on my nerves in the debate side of him, but I think I'd get used to it, especially because his part of the grilled cheese debate is based on someone I actually know and am friends with.

I'm not sure about being friends with the kids, but I do hang out with plenty due to being an educator, and I remember how I was at that age. Out of everyone, Robbie and Akash feel like they'd perfectly fit into my friend group, which may be why I love writing them so much. Individually I think Gwen is the one I'd be most likely to get along with.

I haven't written enough of SOTL, but I'd get along with Jill. Also Ritchie and their group of friends.

Which of your characters would you dislike the most if you met them?

Carmen, I'm so sorry, I would not like you. Gabriel also can get rude and boring. Noelle constantly mentioning her mom would get on my nerves, if I'm being honest. I feel like I could only take Parker in small doses, even if I really like Wade.

I'm not far enough in SOTL to make a decision except for the purposefully antagonistic characters.

Tell me about the process of coming up with of one, all, or any of your characters.

Well, TSP it really depends. Here are all the characters I think are worth mentioning for the entire series.

Originally based on someone I knew before developing a completely different personality: Lexi, Maddie, Ash, Gwen, Noelle, Rose, Kelsey, Carla, George, Hye-Jin, Atsila

They started out as someone completely different in previous drafts and then in the process of developing them I got attached: Jedi, Carmen

I created them for Draft Four as a love interests and then I got attached: Robbie, Akash

I created them in Draft Four to fill up the background: Liam, Ewan, Jazlyn, Wade, Parker, Tyler, Niri, Gabriel, Sam

I needed a name for a prominent figure and then I kept using it and they became important: Raissa

I needed characters for the AU didn't I?: Alex, Issa, CJ, Wendy

Background characters I had no intention of making important: Teo, Xitlali, Anathi

For SOTL, it's simple. Get a character from a fairy tale, nursery rhyme, fable, legend, other public domain work, etc and make them my own!

Do you notice any recurring themes/traits among your characters?

Most of them are queer and neurodivergent. Most are in the 11-25 range given the demographic I write in.

How do you picture them? (As real people you imagined, as models/actors who exist in real life, as imaginary artwork, as artwork you made or commissioned, anime style, etc.)

I want TSP and SOTL to both be in hand-drawn animation, so I imagine them like that. Western animation with anime inspiration like ATLA, Teen Titans, etc is what I typically imagine it in.

Your Writing:

What’s your reason for writing?

I love it!! And also I'd go insane. It's also why I write reviews and analyses of stuff. I've stayed up until 2 am before thinking thoughts on TV shows and I legit can't sleep until I've written an essay.

Is there a specific comment or type of comment you find particularly motivating coming from your readers?

I've gotten "oh I like this little detail" or "wow good dialogue" or "realistic friendship!!" And that always makes me happy.

How do you want to be thought of by those who read your work? (For example: as a literary genius, or as a writer who “gets” the human condition; as a talented worldbuilder, as a role model, etc.)

I just want people to like my characters, is that too much to ask?

What do you feel is your greatest strength as a writer?

I really like character building and details around their lives. I think I'm good at writing consistent characters because I've put so much work behind them.

What have you been frequently told your greatest writing strength is by others?

Dialogue! So many people comment on the realism of my dialogue, and I really like that!

How do you feel about your own writing? (Answer in whatever way you interpret this question.)

If it's at 1 am I think it's awful. When I read my old writing I cringe. Sometimes if I'm in a bad mood my self esteem plummets. But overall, when I look back, I see how far I've come. When I make a revision, even a small one, I smile because I know my writing is getting better. I just get excited about improvement!

If you were the last person on earth and knew your writing would never be read by another human, would you still write?

Yes because it helps me sleep. Were you not paying attention lol

When you write, are you influenced by what others might enjoy reading, or do you write purely what you enjoy? If it’s a mix of the two, which holds the most influence?

No. I write for ME.

Tagging @mk-writes-stuff @elsie-writes @eccaiia @mysticstarlightduck @chauceryfairytales

+ ANYONE ELSE

TSP intro

TSP tag list (ask to be +/-): @thepeculiarbird @illarian-rambling @televisionjester @finchwrites

@nebula--nix @literarynecromancy @honeybewrites @the-golden-comet

SOTL intro

SOTL tag list (ask to be +/-): @illarian-rambling @katwritesshit @wyked-ao3

Under the cut are the blank questions put together for easy copy/paste

About You: When did you start writing? Are the genres/themes you enjoy reading different from the ones you write? Is there an author (or just a fellow writer!) you want to emulate, or one to whom you’re often compared? Can you tell me a little about your writing space(s)? (Room, coffee shop, desk, etc.) What’s your most effective way to muster up some muse? Did the place(s) you grew up in influence the people and places you write about? Are there any recurring themes in your writing, and if so, do they surprise you at all? Your Characters: Would you please tell me about your current favorite character? (Current WIP, past WIP, never used, etc.) Which of your characters do you think you’d be friends with in real life? Which of your characters would you dislike the most if you met them? Tell me about the process of coming up with of one, all, or any of your characters. Do you notice any recurring themes/traits among your characters? How do you picture them? (As real people you imagined, as models/actors who exist in real life, as imaginary artwork, as artwork you made or commissioned, anime style, etc.) Your Writing: What’s your reason for writing? Is there a specific comment or type of comment you find particularly motivating coming from your readers? How do you want to be thought of by those who read your work? (For example: as a literary genius, or as a writer who “gets” the human condition; as a talented worldbuilder, as a role model, etc.) What do you feel is your greatest strength as a writer? What have you been frequently told your greatest writing strength is by others? How do you feel about your own writing? (Answer in whatever way you interpret this question.) If you were the last person on earth and knew your writing would never be read by another human, would you still write? When you write, are you influenced by what others might enjoy reading, or do you write purely what you enjoy? If it’s a mix of the two, which holds the most influence?

[sergeant-angels-trashcan]

Im getting into my dc batfam feels and I just want you to picture dc Kate during under the red hood she calls Bruce a pussy and shoots joker and Jason's like i consider that a marriage proposal I honestly picture Kate and robin!Jason being frenemies like omg you are so annoying but if anyone wants to hurt you they have to go through me vibes then when he comes back she gets protective even though he's literally a crime lord and like twice her size

God yes Kate is so fucking mad at Bruce about Jason's death. So what if Bats wanted to kill Joker? He didn't actually do it! Kate and Dick working together to find and kill him. Kate is very aware that this means she will no longer be welcome in Gotham. Worth it.

(Dick and Kate and New Robin Tim hunting down the Joker for Jason???? Dick and Kate looking at each other over Tim's head like wtf did we become this feral creature's parents?. Dick and Kate in their "I'm too young to die but too old to eat off the kids menu, what a stupid age I am!" era. Jason has someone set up a meeting with "the people who killed the Joker" and it's his childhood crush, his not-brother, and his replacement?!?!?! What the fuck. No, seriously, guys, what the fuck?? Jason reveals his identity out of shock more than anything and is suddenly at the bottom of a very weepy puppy pile)

Can also see Kate buying an apartment building in or just outside of crime alley because of Jason and the desire to look out for his neighborhood in his honor.

It takes waaaay too long for Jason to reveal he's Red Hood to her, mostly because she keeps trying to kill him with extreme prejudice. Like, he gets that's Joker's pre-joker name, right? Is this some kind of sick joke? Gets to the point where he pays Poison Ivy to drug her and dump her at one of his safe houses bc he a dramatic ass hoe

Potential for Kate to think she's dreaming or hallucinating Jason amd she pokes him and screams when he's solid which startles jason into screaming at her. I'm a fan of people screaming at each other for no reason.

as bbs they are TOOOOO much alike. They're enamored with the magic/awesomeness of being a superhero, they are the second of their name, both are birds, they're book nerds. Kate doesn't have a lot of fellow rich people friends so I think she'd take to Jason right away, I can see her giving him gala tips etc. I can see them liking each other as civilians and hating each other as superheroes because they are TOO alike which is kind of funny which is frenemies territory. Like god another bird themed superhero??? Getcha own thing. They get kidnapped from a gala and that's when they learn each other's superhero identity? Maybe???

BUT they always laugh at each other's bird jokes in solidarity

Kate was Jason's first kiss. Bbys holding hands!!!! Jaybin is SO bashful and SO respectful of her boundaries ahhhhh I'm dying

I saw a post about how there's a memorial to the second Robin on a rooftop in crime alley because they know he was one of theirs and I am OBSESSED with Kate tending to it with other residents of the area once she moves to Gotham (Kate moving to Gotham is her version of when a cat stares at you and then knocks your glass of water over. Bruce doesn't think she should be here? Oh he doesn't? How interesting. Unfortunately, all of her fucks have been promised to other issues so she has none for you, Brucie)

Kate is who Jason calls after the batarang to the neck incident. He texts her an SOS and she keeps it together to get jason bandaged up and in bed and then she breaks into the Manor and starts screaming and throwing things at bruce. Would she have been able to enter the Manor normally? Yes. Breaking in was to make a POINT. The point was FUCK YOU BRUCE. (VERY funny if this causes a falling out between Bruce and Ollie because the Hawkeyes are pissed at Batman and the arrow heroes have to stand in solidarity? Maybe prompting Ollie and Roy to patch up their relationship because Arrow Heroes. Honestly it's giving WWI vibes. Like, I got no beef with you but my boo does so fuck you.)

Goddddd I love jason and Kate so much

[liggy-not-potter]

intro post

welcome to my page! this is going to be my pinned post so if you’re seeing this on your dash, you’re good to just scroll if you want :))

welcome to hell

hello :3 you can call me liggy, i go by she/her pronouns but it’s not like i’ll stab you if you mess up somehow and misgender me.

hobbies

i’m a freaking nerd, so book and movie recs are welcome! i’m in a lot of fandoms, so i probably can’t list them all here. harry potter, both canon era and marauders (fuck jkr) and the fanfic i’m writing where harry has a sister no one knew abt. (posting that on ao3 soon). legendborn by tracy deonn, percy jackson (i’m not done with it so no spoilers please), mcu, the owl house, gravity falls, amphibia

i write songs and poetry, i play piano, ukulele, violin and guitar i like drawing but i’m not very good at it all the time, i have thousands of failed art pieces.

dni

the usual. if you discriminate against any minorities or hate people solely because of a group they belong to (religion/lack thereof, race, sexuality, gender orientation) WE DO NOT USE SLURS ON MY PAGE. i don’t give two shits about swearing but slurs are a no no

more random shit about liggy

i have celiacs disease as i’ve mentioned a few times on other posts, so i can’t have anything containing wheat, and i make jokes about it

i have adhd and possible bipolar disorder. i’m a mess, but at least i’m not boringly neurotypical ur local owl (do not ask questions) i’m a minor so don’t be creepy, i don’t care abt interacting with adults as long as you aren’t being a creep gryffindor - enfp

i’m married to @melonhead10. you hear that? she’s mine. go find your own lovable dorky goof, this one’s taken. my children are @0urazz and @crowleys-mortalcounterpart.

the rats (my moots) @jamespotterbbg — kay — my first moot, chaotic, mentally ill as the rest of this site, is the reason i’ve even interacted with half of these people @garden-of-runar — runaround — talented poet, fellow defender of bagels, turns into a different country every other week @melonhead10 — wife of mine — silly little rat, one of the only people on here i know irl, rarely online bc strict parents, if she is online it’s to look at shiny duo and tangled the series @ethanmilo — british ethan — the gay dad friend of this whole hellsite. king of deactivating and coming back out of nowhere. happily in love with @prongsbitch @prongsbitch — james the baked bean — short, gay and irresponsible. has too many doggies but we don’t care bc doggies are great. changes his url every two seconds. in love with @ethanmilo @tequilaqueen — bea — possibly an alcoholic, you’ll never know. hates bagels and commits war crimes. @picklerab23 — dill — lives in a jar on a shelf in a grocery store in wales. speaks in consonants and y’s. @crowleys-mortalcounterpart — brie cheese — my child. genderfluid remus lupin. descendant of the scottish black douglass. (aka they’re fucking scary when angy) i also know them irl. @thejudeduarte (idk ur online name if it’s something other than jude duarte lol) — cruel prince and legendborn fan. really nice and sometimes chaotic. @iamaladder — stepladder (ethan’s version) — chaotic aarakocra boi, old crusty man (in other words a year older than me) another person i know irl (if u want to be added ask me, i just gotta save it for now)

interactions

blow up my ask box, tag me on stuff, and message me all you want. i love being on here and talking to people and making friends <3

my pinterest poetry side blog: @liggy-attempts-poetry ask game: here moodboard on banner by @cheekyboybeth my tags: liggy rambles: all my random ass posts liggy found an ask: i answer asks liggy special: i most likely did something fucking stupid to the queue you go motherfucker: my queued posts, most likely because i’m out of town cus haven’t ever got post blocked yet

[blue-disco-lights]

Petition to make "they were both home monitors who see each other at the George Michael concert" your next one-shot.

Bonus points if they have to wear one of those sashes that says Hall Monitor.

Extra double bonus points if there was only one sash. 😱

You got it @ms-moonlight-inn! This is dedicated to you and my fellow 80s music and George Michael fans (and anyone who wanted to read a Hall Monitor AU in my Tag Game comments lol). @michellemisfit @jrooc @energievie @suzy-queued @mybrainismelted @francesrose3

====

He doesn’t know why they’d pair him up with Mickey Milkovich of all people.

Ian stands up straight, stretches to his full height and adjusts his white Hall Monitor sash. The halls are empty now after afternoon recess, but he walks from the attendance office to the boy’s bathroom, to make sure all’s clear. The halls aren’t going to monitor themselves.

He comes around the corner, and - of course - there’s Mickey, slumped against his locker, reading a comic book and playing with his dumb Yo-Yo. He’s not paying attention at all, and not even wearing his sash right. What a joke.

Ian doesn’t realize he’s staring at him, until Mickey looks up from his book and snarks, “Whatcha starin’ at nerd? Dontcha gotta job to do?”

“We both do,” Ian snaps back, rolls his eyes and goes back to his station. From there, he proceeds to glare at Mickey from a distance.

Ian can’t figure out why Mickey always gives him shit for being a Hall Monitor, when he’s one too.

He was really proud when his teacher recommended him for the school’s Safety Patrol program. His grades were good, and he always got points for excellent attendance and behavior. It was one of the most important jobs you could get at school. None of these asshole kids were going to sneak out of class and mess around in the halls on his watch!

He liked keeping order, and being a Hall Monitor helped him take his mind off his chaotic house, his unpredictable “parents”, and all his responsibilities at home with his young siblings. Plus he liked to be in charge of things... and maybe one day, he’d even get to live his dream and go into the military.

Two kids came around the corner out of nowhere and raced noisily down the hall, right under Mickey’s nose.

“Mickey! You just let those kids run off!”

“I ain’t no snitch like you Gallagher.”

“A snitch? I am NOT a… whatever Milkovich, don’t know why you can’t just take this job seriously.”

“Who cares?”

“I do! Why are you even here? Shouldn’t you be in detention or juvie or something?”

Mickey laser-focused his eyes right on him. They were so blue. And there was this lock of black hair that kept falling into them every few seconds.

And then, much to Ian’s horror… Mickey lifted his hand and swept it through his hair, and how did everything start moving in slow motion all of a sudden?

And then Mickey had the audacity to smile at him, and Ian felt some kind of electric shock zip through his insides, and … noooo. Nope. He was not going to get a crush on Mickey Milkovich. NOPE.

…………………

10 years later

🎶 I swear I won't tease you

Won't tell you no lies

Don't need no bible

Just look in my eyes 🎶

Thousands of people sang at the top of their lungs together, the amphitheater buzzing with energy. Ian couldn’t believe his roommates got these incredible seats.

He’d always wanted to see George Michael in concert.

Ian looked down the row and watched his friends dancing and singing along, having the time of their lives.

His eyes swept around the whole theater, eyes catching on the performance on stage, George swinging his hips in his signature way, crooning “I Want Your Sex” as his backup singers grooved along. He followed the flashing lights around the venue, watching all the concert-goers in their cutest outfits having the best time with friends.

He couldn’t remember a more magical night.

And then his eye stopped and his breath caught. On one guy in particular…

And it must have been magic after all because at that moment, the gorgeous guy looked over at him too.

🎶 It's playing on my mind

It's dancing on my soul

It's taken so much time

So why don't you just let me go 🎶

Ian didn’t even think- he just moved. Past all his confused friends, down a couple of stairs. He didn’t have to go much further because the guy was moving too.

“Mickey?” Ian uttered breathlessly, leaning in closer so the guy could hear him.

“Gallagher,” is all he said, eyes not leaving Ian’s.

The concert lights flash across both their faces, the bass pounds through both their bodies.

🎶 Oh so much love

That you've never seen

Let's make love

Put your trust in me 🎶

Just then, Mickey swept a lock of hair off his forehead, and Ian was transported right back to their days together monitoring the halls.

And he knew he wasn’t letting Mickey go again.

[nocompromise-noregrets]

five good things

just for the hell of it because I've been insufferably bored and unmotivated all sodding day >.<

Booked my coach and airport hotel for my trip to Helsinki in October, having booked the flight and Helsinki hotel a couple of weeks ago :D :D :D got an afternoon coach and hotel in Hayes rather than getting a coach at 2am to get me to the airport to check in for the early morning flight because I am officially Too Old For That Shit these days XD

I get to go on the Elizabeth Line to get between the airport and hotel and back again, which for this hundred per cent Tube nerd is very exciting indeed.

My absolute hero Michael Monroe is doing a 40th anniversary tour for Hanoi Rocks' Two Steps from the Move album including a date in Wolverhampton and we are GOING and so is our mate Lynda who is my fellow lunatic Hanoi fan and it is going to be GREAT. L and I have known each other for 25-odd years and only got to see Himself together for the first time a couple of years ago, so to be able to do it again so soon is awesome :D

Not only that, he's just announced a solo acoustic tour of Finland between August and October and the Helsinki date is 25 October, upon which day I will PHYSICALLY BE IN HELSINKI and also not at either of the other two gigs I'm going to Helsinki for which are on the 19th and 26th, so you bet your bottom dollar I've just booked myself a ticket :D :D :D

I have FINALLY written the Twins-make-their-Choice fic; it is not long-form as I'd expected but part of a series of shorter fics involving them and their lives post-War of the Ring that I'm doing for Writers' Month and I'm having a whale of a time with them.

I'm also having a whale of a time with my TRSB fic, which I cannot talk about but am greatly enjoying collaborating with the lovely @erathene!

Oh yeah, and I got my final course result back from the OU, which got me my overall result for the whole degree, which is a First! I am a little bit smug but trying not to be too insufferable about it; it wasn't entirely unexpected as I've been pulling in Distinctions all the way along, but I'm still a bit bewildered because I spent my entire adult life until I started this degree believing I was only capable of a solid 64% - but with 30-odd years of added maturity and some proper guidance, here I am.

And I signed straight up for the MA in Applied Linguistics and am very excited to get some more top-class nerdery in come October!

Oh yeah, Deadpool and Wolverine! No spoilers here, but let me tell you, one cameo in particular made me very happy indeed and I take back 75% of what I ever said about that specific bit of casting XDDDD

And Rings of Power! Super excited for that, too. :D :D :D The trailers look like the story is really getting going after the first season's worth of exposition, and aaaaaaaa!