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bottlesofrouge · 8 months ago

Text

on one condition.

harry styles x original character

part five.

word count: 12.6K

warnings: talks of a past physically abusive relationship, smut (finaalllyyy!!!), nsfr!

27 JULY 2018

harry wakes up to lynn sitting on the arm of the couch. her fingers dance along his arm as his name falls from her lips in quiet whispers. it’s still dark outside, and he rubs the sleep out of his eyes, struggling to remember just exactly where he is.

silas and lynn had gone into the bedroom shortly after dinner. he wasn’t really sure why he was expecting silas to take the couch, but when the click of the lock echoed through the quiet condo, harry knew that he was stuck with the short end of the stick.

there were no goodnights said and no sleepy smiles from lynn. harry sat in the dark for what felt like hours, listening to the muffled laughter coming from behind the bedroom door while he tried to swallow down the ugly, burning jealousy that came bubbling up in his throat.

“harry,” she whispers again. her touch moves from his arms to his hair. “are you awake?”

“yeah,” he hums. “what’s going on? are you okay?”

“i can’t fall asleep,” she says. “not when i don’t know if you’re alright.”

“why wouldn’t i be alright?” he can barely make out anything in the dark. the only source of light was the dim glow of the moon coming in through an uncovered window. it doesn’t do much, but it illuminates her face enough for him to see the way it’s etched with worry.

“the same reason i can’t sleep unless all of the doors are locked,” she doesn’t elaborate any further, and harry’s not really sure what she means by that. “i’m sorry for waking you. couldn’t tell if you were breathing.”

“do you wanna lay out here with me?” she only blinks at him. “you don’t have to, but i think you’d be able to feel if i was breathing or not.”

“are you sure?”

“c’mere,” he presses himself further into the couch, and lifts the blanket for her to slide under. harry’s shocked a little when she actually does.

it’s uncomfortable at first. he lays there like a board, arms straight down at his sides until lynn reaches behind for his hand. he thinks she’s giving him the key to the front door, but instead she presses his palm to her stomach just like he had done the night before.

it really was a complete accident. harry was so embarrassed to open his eyes and find himself wrapped around her the way he was. lynn was still sleeping when he woke up. she never mentioned it, and he had hoped that maybe she never noticed. he could not have been more wrong.

she doesn’t say anything when she does it, so instead of overthinking the situation and letting it keep him up until the sun rises, he leans into it. harry molds his body to lynn’s, letting his fingers stretch across her tummy just like she wanted them to. their legs are crossed at the ankles, and harry can’t help it when he lets his lips press right where her neck meets her shoulder. he half expects her to push him away, but she only sighs, falling asleep mere seconds later.

✮✮✮

“good morning, cuddle bugs,” harry doesn’t wake up again until silas is practically whisper singing right into his ear. the man’s standing over the two of them, a mug of coffee in each hand and a wide grin on his face.

when harry blinks enough to get the sleep out of his eyes, he sees that lynn’s got her cheek squished against his chest and her arm thrown around his torso. both of her legs are in between his and she had stolen their previously shared blanket and selfishly wrapped herself up in it. “were my cuddles not good enough for you, lynn?”

“oh my god, shut up, silas,” lynn groans, letting herself lean into harry even more. “and close the curtains while you’re up. m’so tired.”

silas does as he’s told before coming back over to harry to hand him one of the mugs he was holding. he sits down in the recliner next to them without saying a word, and turns on some local news station for the two to watch.

the volume’s on low, and silas is too focused on whatever stories that are running that he doesn’t try to engage in any conversation. he is so incredibly thankful for it, too. he wasn’t exactly sure what the other had to say about walking out of the bedroom to find his best friend wrapped around him. he wasn’t sure what lynn has told silas about them, but she surely had to have mentioned the fact that he has been treating her so terribly for the last two months.

harry’s free hand absentmindedly travels to lynn’s hair, fingers gently scratching her scalp as quiet, appreciative hums leave her mouth. he can’t really tell if she’s just in and out of sleep or if she’s fully awake, but he doesn’t care as long as he got lynn like this. he’d be stupid not to wrap himself up in everything that she was willing to give him. after all, it’d all go away as soon as they got back to new york.

part of him couldn’t wait to get home, even though he knew that going home meant he would have to face his parents. he also knew that it meant he would be getting back to his new routine. ever since he stopped sharing his days with an entire bottle of hard liquor, waking up has never felt so good.

he was productive. incredibly productive, actually. during the first week, he got around to turning his office into a small art studio. harry had purchased easels and canvases and nearly an entire display of oil paints. of course he put the transactions on john’s credit card. he thought of it as reparations for his shitty childhood, but if his dad asked, he would say it was a parting gift for his frat.

the other part of him wanted to be anywhere but home because home meant no more waking up to lynn and no more soft kisses and warm touches. home meant morning coffee alone and silence so loud that if he closed his eyes hard enough, he would swear he could hear it screaming.

you’re alone. you’re alone. you’re alone. you’re alone.

and honestly, the first few days wouldn’t be too bad. harry thinks he’d use the time to clear his head. the forced proximity had him thinking (and feeling) so many confusing things when it came to lynn. he knew that once they were apart for a little while, they’d all go away. maybe the two would even go back to hating each other.

they’d see each other once a week, maybe twice if they were feeling crazy, and harry would only be brutally reminded of just how alone he actually was. the words would echo in his head like they always did. just like the ticking of a clock.

you’re alone. you’re alone. you’re alone. you’re alone.

maybe it’s his fault for giving himself away so easily. there are so many people who know absolutely nothing about him except for what gets him going in bed, and normally, that fact didn’t bother him one bit. he likes feeling good and making other people feel good, and he loves the fact that he can participate in both of those activities with no strings attached.

however, on the rare days like today, the mere thought of it makes harry want to scratch the skin off his body and start fresh. he wants to be someone new. someone who is loved, and someone that people actually want to know.

and really, that’s where this whole thing stems from. the constant craving for something that is so unattainable for him. he just wants to be known.

harry itches for the day that someone knows just how much he loves ballet and theater. they’ll know he spent the first three years of high school dedicating his life to the drama club, spending afternoon after afternoon designing and painting sets. those long afternoons would soon turn into rehearsing lines in the passenger seat of oliver’s car, nothing but a flashlight on one of their phones illuminating the words on their scripts.

they’ll know he stopped because of how his dad felt about it. they’ll learn all about his senior year football stint, and maybe he’d also be inclined to tell them that he did it just to please him, but even then, john never went to a single game.

“harry,” silas’s leaning forward to nudge harry with his hand. “did you hear me?”

“no,” he admits. “what did you say?”

“i asked if you were hungry. we’re supposed to meet everyone for breakfast in ten.”

“i’m okay,” harry hums. his eyes fall to lynn who’s now created a small wet spot on his shirt with her drool. “you go. she’s been having a hard time sleeping.”

“she has for years,” silas responds. harry isn’t sure if he’s just stating a fact or if he’s trying to make sure he’s aware that he knows lynn in ways that harry never will. “i’ve never seen her out like this though. it’s weird.”

when silas decides to take harry up on his offer, he stands up, stretches, and then puts his shoes on before walking out of the door. it slams a little bit behind him, and lynn jolts at the sound. her head flies up, and she’s looking at harry with wide eyes and parted lips.

“just silas, honey,” his knuckles drag across the highest point of her cheek. “you can go back to sleep for a bit.”

✮✮✮

silas: it’s amelia day!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

silas: you better be awake when i get back

silas: first round is on you btw consider it your apology for having to look at you and harry all morning #YUCK

lynn shuts her phone off and peers up at harry to make sure he wasn’t reading over her shoulder. (that would be so humiliating.) she finds him fast asleep underneath her. his head is tilted back, resting on a pillow that was propped up on the arm of the couch. his lips are parted, and she thinks that if she’s quiet enough she could hear tiny snores fall from them. god, he is so cute.

“harry,” she gently shakes him, and when he opens his eyes and blinks a few long blinks like he’s trying to gather his surroundings, she can’t help but laugh. “good morning, sunshine.”

“what time is it?” he rasps out around a yawn.

“nearly noon.” lynn sits up so harry can stretch and sit up properly. “it’s amelia day, so we have to leave soon. get ready, and i’ll make you something to eat. my treat for sharing this uncomfortable thing with me all night.”

lynn only makes them a plate of leftovers that consists of stuff she found in various take out boxes in the refrigerator. it wasn’t anything crazy; yet, it takes nearly fifteen minutes before she has it all set out on the breakfast bar. she shouldn't be blamed though. it’s not her fault that she couldn’t stop thinking about last night.

it wasn’t until silas was knocked out next to her that she realized harry was out in the living room all alone. she didn’t mean to exclude him. it kind of just happened, and she felt so guilty for it. she couldn’t stop wondering just how upset harry would be with her in the morning, and soon after, all of the overthinking turned into wondering if harry was okay.

honestly, she knew deep down there was no reason for him not to be, but that didn’t stop her from going out and checking. that’s all she meant to do, really. she planned on making sure he was alive and well and then she would climb back into bed with silas, but when he made room for her on the couch, lynn couldn’t say no.

she missed sleeping next to him.

it was stupid. they had only been on good terms for a few days, but lynn couldn’t imagine ever falling asleep without him pressed against her again. she thought that maybe it was just the simple fact that she was next to someone that had her sleeping so well, but no. it was harry.

silas has probably spent hundreds of hours helping her fall asleep. nearly every time he’s in town, he sits next to her in bed and runs his fingers through her hair until she’s napping. lynn really did appreciate it so much. she knew she would never get those precious naps in without him, but that was just it. they were always a quick little nap, never lasting more than an hour.

with harry, it was so different. all he had to do was be in the same room as her and she’d be out for hours. it was silly, and all in her mind. of course she knew that, it’s just… she doesn’t really want it to end.

harry doesn’t talk until the two of them are sharing an uber to the town square. he’s exhausted. lynn knows that, and she feels so shitty for having him take the couch. he was doing her a favor being there. the least she could do was give him the bed.

“it’s amelia’s birthday?” his voice is quiet when he asks, like the uber driver hearing would give away the faux relationship.

“no,” she laughs a little, not because of him, but because of what amelia day actually is. “silas pays amelia to watch jane while the adults go out for a few drinks.”

“is it the same day every year?”

lynn shakes her head, “just whenever silas feels like it. it’s usually just the two of us, and he convinces her when he thinks i’ve burnt myself out watching them.”

harry only hums and looks out the window.

lynn sits at the bar, nursing her third dirty martini as she watches silas and harry play a game of darts. silas was honestly great at the game. never once has he let lynn win. however, when harry threw his first dart, she realized that today might be the day her dreams of silas losing come true.

she’s been dreaming of the day ever since she had played against silas for the first time at a bar in her college town. he was visiting her for spring break. nearly the entire school had gone further south to a beach, so they pretty much had the bar to themselves. they played forty seven games that week, and lynn had only been close to winning once.

so, she offers to buy harry a shot if he wins, and when he says he’d rather have a kiss, she says he can have that, too.

she watches as harry goes to throw his dart. he closes one of his eyes and the tip of his tongue sticks out a little at the corner of his mouth every time he brings his hand up to aim. normally, she would’ve poked a little fun because he looked crazy, but she was a couple drinks in and she couldn’t help but find everything harry did to be at least a little bit attractive.

harry throws the winning dart, and lynn already has a shot of don julio waiting for him. she holds the little glass in between her fingers and the lime wedge in between her lips as she moves over to the two guys. a little pool of anxiety fills her stomach when she thinks about what exactly she’s doing. the lime placement seemed like a good idea after she had finished her third drink, but when she sees silas’s face, she thinks that maybe she was wrong.

the worry is only there for a second because harry tips the shot back, and then presses his mouth to hers and takes the wedge in between his teeth. the whole thing has her skin burning all the way from her toes up to her ears, but she doesn’t have time to be embarrassed about it because as soon as he’s done, he’s kissing her.

their kisses are messy and wet, and lynn can taste the lime sitting on his lips and the tequila coating his mouth. his mouth is practically devouring hers in a way that has her chest aching and her fingertips tingling. there’s no way that the vodka and olive juice she had been drinking tasted as good as he’s making it seem.

harry pulls away when silas clears his throat and lynn can’t even work up enough nerve to look over at him. the blush on her cheeks. her heart skipping beats in her chest. the way she feels so giddy. god, it was like she was a teenager again.

“i think we should get another drink before we head back,” silas breaks the silence first.

harry agrees and the two of them follow silas over to the bar. harry’s got his arm around lynn’s back, and his hand rests on her waist. he orders his drink and her dirty martini while she pretends not to feel the way his thumb is sliding against the small sliver of skin poking out between her top and skirt.

lynn sits on a bar stool next to kathleen when her fourth dirty martini is placed in front of her. harry keeps his arm draped around the back of her chair, chatting to silas about their last game. silas claims harry cheated, but harry insists that silas is just a sore loser.

“are you three enjoying your vacation,” lynn hears her dad’s voice from down the bar, and makes no move to respond. instead, she brings her glass up to her lips and takes a big sip.

“i am,” harry turns his attention to the older man, offering him a small smile. “thank you for having me. i really appreciate it.”

“it’s the least i can do since you’ve been putting up with my daughter. she can be a lot to handle sometimes.”

her dad laughs, and lynn can’t help the rage that’s bubbling up in her chest. putting up with my daughter? how would he know what putting up with lynn was like? peter was only around for half of her life, and even then, they’ve only shared a few hundred words with each other, if that. the man barely fucking knew her.

“it’s quite the opposite,” she feels harry moving his hand from the chair to wrap around her shoulder and pull her into his chest. “really, lynn puts up with me.”

“good to know, but i was referring to jane,” he brings his bottle to his lips. “she has so much energy, and at my age…”

lynn doesn’t really care what else her father has to say, so she turns her attention to the bartender and orders herself one more. it would probably end up being a mistake because she could already feel her head going all fuzzy. (and that was obvious a drink ago when she made out with harry in the back corner of the bar.) but, she felt like she needed it in order to stomach being around her parents for a second longer.

“you’re sure you need another?” kathleen’s speaking to her. “don’t want to have a repeat of the last time where you didn’t even make it to dinner.”

lynn decides to pretend like she didn’t hear, and insteads thanks the bartender when he slides the glass in front of her. she didn’t come to dinner the night her mother is referring to because of something more than a little too much to drink, and she thinks that if she lets herself think about it for a minute longer, she’d start crying so hard that she might end up coughing up a lung.

aunt cecilia moves from the other side of her father to sit next to silas. she strikes up a conversation with the two boys, and lynn can’t make the buzzing in her brain quiet down enough to focus on what they’re saying. it is so unfair that being around her mother has the ability to ruin what was supposed to be a fun day with her friends.

lynn gets why silas invited her parents. really, she does. just because they treated her so poorly, doesn’t mean they treated everyone else the same. that was obvious when silas came home from his freshman year of college to all of his stuff sitting on the front lawn of his parents’ house. peter and kathy had moved every discarded item of his into the guest room within the day, and silas claimed it as his own until he moved out for good two years later.

“y’alright, honey?” harry’s voice is so low and breathy. it tickles her ear enough to make her laugh, and he offers her a warm smile at the sound. “there we go.”

his lips tenderly press against her forehead and then he’s leaning back to look at her, worry deep in his eyes. she loves when harry’s soft like this, even if she can see silas rolling his eyes at the two of them in her peripheral.

“i miss your last boyfriend,” lynn’s brought out of her trance by kathleen’s voice. “he never touched you like this in front of us. it’s just disrespectful.”

lynn thinks that she’s misheard her mom at first, but when harry’s hands fall from her, she knows he’s heard it, too. silas and aunt cece are deep in conversation, missing what kathleen had just said, and harry’s looking at her with a frown on his lips. his eyes are pleading with hers, like he’s trying to apologize for something that isn’t even his fault.

“i’m sorry, ms. kathy. i didn’t eve-”

“yeah, well,” lynn clears her throat. “jaxson used to hit me when we weren’t in front of you guys.”

“what?”

she knows that she shouldn’t have said it, especially not here. lynn’s just so upset and angry and sad, and all she wanted to do was make kathleen feel the way she has been making her feel since the day she was born. like a complete and utter failure.

“i couldn’t make it to dinner last time because my mouth was bleeding so bad,” her voice is quiet, yet her confession draws the attention from the rest of the group. “not because of one too many drinks.”

it was definitely the five dirty martinis that had her spilling the secret she’s held on to the tightest, but it’s out now and so were the tears that came flooding from her eyes.

“why didn’t you tell us?” her mom has tears of her own on her cheeks, and it only makes lynn roll her eyes. kathleen never really cared about her, and she wasn’t about to start letting her now.

“don’t you see how you treat me? of course i didn’t come to you. nothing i ever do is worth a second of your time,” lynn feels so incredibly vulnerable as she speaks. she half expects kathleen to tell her to grow up, and the other half expects her to get on her hands and knees and apologize profusely for being such a shit mother.

she does neither. instead her eyes fall on silas and aunt cece, a look of realization spreading across her face. “you two knew.”

when lynn showed up on her aunts’ doorstep after a particularly rough fight with her ex, aunt cece helped put her back together again and let her move in for a few months. they hid it from peter and kathleen, per lynn’s request, and when jane was born, she went home. the three of them never really spoke about it, but lynn thinks she wouldn’t be standing here right now if it wasn’t for aunt cece and aunt rosie.

“this is exactly what i fucking mean,” she stands up from her stool, using harry to steady herself, and then she begs him to please, please take her back to the condo.

and he does. harry doesn’t say anything the entire uber ride back. instead, he holds her hand in his lap and wipes under her nose with the sleeve of his shirt when he’s had enough of her loud sniffing.

“i could’ve found a tissue,” her voice is so scratchy it hurts when she speaks.

“but you didn’t,” harry counters. “‘was kind of grossing me out if i’m being honest.”

“heeeeey,” her hands gently shove his shoulders as she laughs under her breath. it’s quiet for a second, and she can’t seem to tear her eyes away from his. it’s like she can feel the pity from his eyes seeping into her own, and it makes her a little sad. “please don’t look at me like that.”

harry looks away and clears his throat, and lynn feels so incredibly guilty for even saying anything, “i don’t like when people pity me. i didn’t mean…”

“i know you didn’t mean to tell me, but knowing now helps me understand you better.” he’s running his forefinger along the creases in her palm. “and i don’t mean to make you feel like i pity you. i just… you didn’t deserve to go through that.”

“okay,” she offers him a warm smile. “i was going to tell you, but i was nervous that i’d scare you away.”

“you could never scare me away.”

“why’s that? am i your only friend?” lynn only means it in a teasing way, but the way harry’s smile drops says that she’s hit the nail on the head.

“yeah,” his face draws together when he speaks. “um, i don’t know. there’s not really anyone besides you. sorry if that’s weird or makes you uncomfortable. i’m not the best at making friends.”

“s’not weird. i was only joking, harry. i didn’t mean-”

“you don’t have to apologize,” his eyes fall to his lap, and then he looks back up to her. “that’s not why you can’t scare me away. i just… i like having you around, lynn. i don’t want that to change once we go home.”

his words make her cheeks warm, “it won’t. i like having you around, too.” and when that doesn’t feel like enough, “i’m really glad you came, harry.”

29 JULY 2018

when harry wakes up, the bed is empty and the condo is quiet. there’s no echoes of an overworked coffee pot and no hushed whispers bouncing off the walls. his phone reads 11:53am, and there is nothing but a singular text from lynn sitting in his notification center.

getting breakfast with si & then going to the beach. join us when you’re awake :)

harry gets out of bed and heads for the shower to wash the sleep off of his face (and also the sweat off of his body). he’s spent the last two nights wrapped up with lynn in the bed while silas took the couch. the girl loved her blankets, and being next to her sometimes made him feel like he was next to a furnace.

he decides against joining the two when he’s on his second lather of shampoo. after lynn had talked about her last relationship at the bar, the three have practically been conjoined at the hip doing pretty much everything together. even at the family dinners, they sat at the end of the table next to jane and amelia to keep kathleen, or anyone else, from bringing it up.

as soon as harry heard what lynn said, he wanted to throw up. he felt sick the entire uber drive back, and even worse when they sat on the couch next to one another and she told him about the time she had brought him here. lynn was so incredibly kind, and the thought of anyone hurting her was just so devastating.

but, he did as she asked, and tried acting like looking at her didn’t make his chest feel like it was caving in. (because it did.) instead, he offered her kisses and soft touches every time the thoughts got to be a little too much. lynn deserved to feel loved and appreciated, and he was going to make sure she never forgot that.

harry: i think i’ll spend some time with your sisters. have fun with silas

her response comes through almost immediately.

lynn: they’d loooove that!!! couldn’t stop talking about you at breakfast

lynn: i’ll miss you today :(

the grin that spreads across harry’s face when he reads the message is embarrassing. he never really understood what people meant when they said ‘giggling and kicking my feet’, but when he catches his reflection in the mirror, he gets it.

jane and amelia are waiting for him on the front porch of their condo, and as soon as he’s in sight, the little girl runs to him like she’s an olympian sprinter. she giggles as she does, and harry soaks up every last one because he knows there will be a time when he is nothing but a distant memory for her.

the three of them walk to an ice cream parlor that harry has been dying to go to since the first day they arrived. the outside was painted a bright pink and had mismatched patio furniture sitting out in front of it. he always found these ice cream shops to be the best, and preferred them over the lousy chains.

harry orders his usual mint chip and jane her chocolate chip, and then he tells amelia to get whatever she wants. it was his treat today, even though the two girls were the ones to bring up the idea to go. the older sister decides on a plain strawberry shake, and once it’s all paid, they sit at one of the tables outside.

“don’t forget your napkin,” he reminds jane. “i don��t want to return you all covered in sugar.”

the little girl laughs, and wipes awaythe river of melted vanilla ice cream flowing down her chin, “s’okay. mom says it’s bath night anyway.”

harry listens as jane then goes into a play by play of her day. if one singular detail was wrong, she’d have to pause, reset the scene, and then she could continue. it starts with her saying she chose a red shirt to wear, but actually it was more orange now that she’s thinking about it. then, it’s what she ate for breakfast. jane realizes midway through that she had actually eaten four apple slices instead of the five she said previously because silas had taken one from her plate. the whole thing is painful, but harry sits through every second of it with a smile on his face.

“you alright, amelia?” harry asks once jane has quieted down and turned her attention back to her ice cream. “you’ve been quiet.”

“does lynn ever talk about her last boyfriend?"

he swallows. "yeah. she talks about him sometimes. why?”

“he was mean to me,” amelia states. “and i thought you’d be the same.”

“melia, i would never-”

“i know. i know,” amelia’s quick to cut him off. “that was obvious when jane hit you with that ball.”

jane’s shoulders drop at her sister’s words, “i’m still very sorry, harry.”

“i know you are, janey,” his hand squeezes her little arm from across the table. “i already told you to stop worrying about.”

“i feel bad for being so rude to you,” amelia admits. “and for trying to get lynn to break up with you.”

“you what?”

“i’m sorry. i didn’t-” the girl’s stumbling over her words like she can’t get them out fast enough when harry interrupts her with a laugh. really, he doesn’t mean to, but the thought of amelia trying to end a relationship that wasn’t even real to begin had him giggling.

"no need to be sorry," he says. "if i saw my sister in a bad relationship, i'd probably act the exact same. probably even worse if i’m being honest.”

“a man who grew up with girls,” amelia nods her head slowly before sitting back in her chair with her arms crossed. “makes sense.”

“now, what’s that supposed to mean?”

“it’s a compliment! ugh, you’re so old.”

harry laughs at the girls in front of him, a feeling of genuine happiness washing over him. maybe he was planning too far ahead, but he can't help but think that he actually does want to be a dad.

“hurry up and finish your ice cream,” he says. “i think there’s a souvenir shop we can go to just a few stores up the street.”

the three don’t end up going back until dinner time. the two girls walk in front of him, each swinging their shopping bags at each other for no other reason than to be annoying. he didn’t really mean to spend a hundred dollars on the two, but he did. jane always looked up at him with big round eyes and he could never say no.

they had passed a boutique with a blue dress hanging in the window, and amelia made a comment about it matching the shade of lynn’s eyes. she was right. it was printed with this floral pattern and had ruffles at the sleeves. harry couldn’t stop thinking about just how pretty lynn would look in it, and that’s how he ended up with a bag of his own.

maybe it was pushing the boundaries of their friendship a little too far, but he really didn’t care. harry thinks it would be a crime for that dress to belong to anyone besides lynn.

aunt cece is the one who opens the door when jane knocks, and to his surprise, she invites him in to enjoy the dinner that she had prepared. he’s about to say no when she lets him know that lynn and silas had gone into town for an early dinner of their own before he had to go to the airport, so he changes his mind and joins the two aunts in the kitchen.

harry sits at the table while the two shared red wine out of a singular glass along with what seemed like a million kisses. rosie rested herself against cece’s back as she finished transferring the meal to serving dishes. she’d whisper things to the other in tones so quiet harry couldn’t make out the words, but each time aunt cece’s face would flush and she’d playfully push the other woman away.

he hopes he gets a love as pure as theirs when he’s older.

“what’s in the bag?” aunt rosie joins him at the table.

“it’s nothing really,” harry can feel his cheeks grow warm and he does his best to avoid the woman’s stare.

“oh come on, you’re blushing all the way to your neck. what is it? we’re very big on sex positivity, so-”

“oh my god. it’s a dress. a normal dress,” harry can’t listen to it a second longer. his finger pulls the collar of his shirt away from his neck. god, why was it so hot it here?

“aww,” aunt rosie coos at him, peaking into the brown paper bag. “it looks gorgeous, harry.”

he hums. “it reminded me of her.”

“you should take her to that restaurant she was talking about this morning tomorrow. give her a chance to wear it,” aunt cece says from the kitchen, and rosie seconds the idea.

“i overslept today, so i don’t really know which one you’re talking about.”

“hmm,” the woman in the kitchen has her hand on her hip and her face in her hands. “i’m forgetting the name.”

“latitudes,” kathleen’s voice comes from the doorway. “that’s the restaurant.”

harry can tell by her demeanor that she’s trying to be nice, so he offers her a warm smile before thanking her.

dinner isn’t as bad as he thought it would be. he imagined it being incredibly awkward because of what had happened a few days prior, but surprisingly it’s not. he’s not really sure what was said or what happened after he had left with lynn, but he suspects it was something eye opening by the way kathleen is acting.

when gets back to his condo, he finds lynn sitting on the living room floor with at least twenty photobooks sprawled around her. there’s a half full bottle of wine on the side table, and an empty glass seated at her feet. he wasn’t really sure where she kept getting so much wine. they had only purchased three bottles.

“hey,” he’s kicking his shoes off by the door.

“hey,” she doesn’t look up. her eyes are too focused on some photos that she’s holding in her lap, and he takes the opportunity to slip the boutique bag into one of his drawers.

harry changes into his pajamas and then gets himself a glass from the kitchen. with a deep breath, he moves to the living room and sits next to her on the ground. “can i join you?”

“you don’t have to ask,” lynn reaches for the bottle before filling both of their glasses and setting it back down. she offers him a smile, “such a silly question, harry.”

“did you and silas have a good day?”

“the best,” she says with a grin on her face. harry can’t help the jealousy that starts burning in his chest. he wonders if she says the same when silas asks about him. “we found all of these photobooks. what about you? were the girls good?”

“so good,” he replies. “we got ice cream, and had a little shopping trip.”

“i bet they had so much fun,” she takes her eyes away from the photo book to look up at him. her mouth opens and she pauses, and then, “i missed you today.”

they sit next to each other as lynn opens up a fresh book. it was full of photos from when she was only a kid. there were so many pictures of her in the summertime, lounging around a swimming pool wearing rugrats themed swimmies and eating ice cream, and there were even more of her hanging from the monkey bars in playgrounds and posing cutely in flower fields. his favorites were the ones of her standing behind a mixing bowl with a monogrammed apron tied around her waist.

as she turns the pages, the pictures turn from summer to fall and it goes from wide toothy smiles soaking up the sun rays to close lipped grins at school events. there were photos of her at chorus concerts and class parties and some of her sitting with her arms around her friends in the school cafeteria.

there’s a woman who appears in quite a few of the photos, not enough that he would say she was in almost all of them, but enough that harry recognizes her presence. she looked nothing like lynn or any of her family members. her skin was tan and she had long dark hair with matching dark eyes. she wore red lipstick in a lot of the photos, and every time she did, baby lynn had a matching red lip print stamped on the side of her cheek.

“who’s that?” harry decides to ask when she pulls out a picture from the plastic sleeve. it was of the woman hugging her tight while lynn held up a little certificate indicating she won some award.

“she was my au pair,” lynn traces the corners of the picture as she brings it closer to her face.

“the one your dad had an affair with?”

lynn shakes her head. “the one after. elena,” she clarifies. i spent most of my childhood with her.”

“yeah? it looks like she loved you an awful lot.”

“y’know like that feeling that you get when you think of your mom?” she asks. “i get that when i think of her. she was wonderful, harry.”

“do you still talk to her?”

“no, i think my mom stopped hiring her when amelia was two,” her voice is thick when she speaks, and harry can see the glassiness in her eyes when she looks over to pass him the photo. “i still use that recipe in my bakery today. i wish she could see it.”

harry looks at the photo and can’t stop the smile from growing on his lips. little lynn was grinning so wide, her smile nearly went from ear to ear. the certificate was proudly displayed in her hands with a large FIRST PLACE written across the top. elena had her arms wrapped around her body so tightly, you could see the imprints of her fingertips in little lynn’s flesh. his fingers flip the photo over, and his eyes scan the words written on the back.

e. adams, 1998

“you’re what?” harry speaks. “24? 25?”

“i’m 27,” the girl laughs when she sees harry’s face. “what? is 24 too young for you?”

“i’m 21, lynn,” he deadpans. “freshly, too. my birthday’s in february.”

“oh god,” her wine glass nearly tips over when she turns to face him, and harry wraps his fingers around the stem to catch it.

neither of them speak for a moment. her eyes are scanning over his face like she’s not really sure what to say. both of them had just assumed they were each other’s age.

“is that,” harry pauses. “does that bother you?”

lynn’s bottom lip goes between her teeth before she sighs, “i mean, it’s all pretend, isn’t it?”

harry wants to say that it doesn’t feel all pretend when lynn’s got his mouth pressed to his. or when they’re alone and her fingers rub every ounce of stress from his body. or when they’re in bed every night, pressed so closely together that harry can feel the way her heart beats against his own.

instead, he only smiles. “yeah, i guess it really doesn’t matter.”

they each finish their glass of wine, and harry’s quick to pour them the rest of whatever’s left in the bottle. honestly, she was right. what they were doing was supposed to be pretend. it was his fault for letting parts of it get too real.

maybe lynn didn’t need to know that some of his family disowned him because of his queerness. she also probably didn’t need to hear harry’s drunken confession about him being a friendless loser, and she definitely could’ve gone without seeing him sleeping with someone else.

he takes another large gulp of wine when the realization hits. he likes that she knows those things about him.

“evelyn,” her voice is soft as it pulls him from his thoughts.

“hm?”

“i know you saw it,” she points to the discarded photo on the ground between them. harry was so focused on the bolded 1998, he didn’t even notice the tiny e that preceded it.

“evelyn,” the intensity of his voice matches her, and as soon as the words leave his lips, her eye’s fill with tears. “oh, don’t cry.”

“they’re good tears,” she breathes. “promise.”

his hand cradles her face and tucks her hair behind her ear so it doesn’t get all sticky from the now falling tears. the way she looks up at him feels so real to harry, and it makes his chest grow tight. he didn’t know how he’d be able to walk away from all of this unscathed, but at least he had her now. he’d be stupid not to soak up everything she wanted to give him.

“it’s a pretty name,” he’s nearly whispering now. “fits you.”

“it was my grandmother’s,” she chews on her lips. “she was lovely, harry.”

“she sure seems like it,” her head feels heavy in his hand like she’s relying on him to hold it upright for her. “why’d you change it?”

“jaxson ruined it for me, and hearing it was a lot,” she sighs and her eyes squeeze shut. “it’s stupid i know.”

“i don’t think it’s stupid, blondie,” she looks up at him like she doesn’t necessarily believe him, and harry thinks that if he didn’t find out that she was twenty fucking seven years old minutes prior, he’d kiss her. “not stupid at all.”

really, he still wants to. harry wants to kiss her so hard that she forgets that goddamn loser that made her own name sound unbearable to her. the thought just makes him so incredibly angry. he could kill him.

“hearing it used to make my stomach churn,” she admits.

“it doesn’t anymore?”

her head shakes, “no. at least not when it comes from you.”

“i can call you evelyn if that’s something you want,” lynn sits up when he offers, straightening herself so she’s no longer leaning into his touch. he instantly misses the weight of her.

“yeah, i mean if it’s not too much of an ask. and maybe not in front of my family? it’s been forever since anyone’s called me that. i just- haven’t been able to recognize myself in the mirror since i started going by lynn.” she laughs lightly, but it just sounds sad at this point. “sorry, i think i’ve had too much wine.”

“yeah, i can do that,” harry hums, and he can’t help it when he reaches for her hand. his finger trails across the back of her knuckles. “it’ll be our little secret, won’t it, evelyn?”

30 JULY 2018

harry is absolutely gnawing the fuck out of the sides of his fingers while he waits for lynn to get out of the shower. as soon as she went in (for the third time because she kept forgetting things), he had laid out the dress neatly on the bed with a necklace that kathleen had slipped him at breakfast. she had said that it was lynn’s grandmother’s.

he wasn’t really sure if this whole thing was crossing the line of their fake dating arrangement. they’d be going for no other reason than to spend some time together, but really, friends spend time together all the time. silas and lynn just had dinner last night.

but did silas buy her a dress for it?

whatever. it was too late to take it all back now. he hears the water shut off, and harry knows he’ll see how she really feels about it soon. he was going to be sick.

the sound of the door knob twisting echoes through the quiet room, and then, “harry?”

“yeah?” he sounded so fucking stupid.

“what’s all this?”

“um, a dress?”

lynn moves into the doorway of the bedroom to look at him. she’s wearing a robe around her body and a towel in her hair. “obviously. where did it come from?”

“a boutique,” he replies, and she raises her eyebrow. “i bought it for you yesterday. with amelia and jane.”

“you bought me that?” her voice is quieter than before, and she no longer has the teasing smile that was sitting on her lips just a moment ago.

“yeah,” why did he feel so shy? “if you don’t like it, i kept the receipt-”

“don’t like it? harry, i love it. it’s gorgeous.”

“good,” he sighs. “i thought so, too.”

lynn doesn’t say anything else, but she doesn’t move from her spot in the doorway either. she’s got the softest smile on her face, and she’s looking at him like she’s not really sure what she wants to do next.

“well, go put it on,” he’s moving in her direction to get to the shower. “you don’t want to miss our latitudes reservations, do you?”

“no way!” she shrieks, and when harry follows it with a corny little ‘yes way’, she hugs him around his neck so tightly, her feet aren’t even touching the ground. “thank you. thank you. thank you.” her words are being whispered against the skin of the crook of his neck.

“it was nothing, really.”

“you always say that,” lynn leans away from him, still keeping her arms around his neck.

“i just like seeing you like this,” and maybe he should have picked different words.

“what?” she laughs. “half naked and pressed up against you?”

“jesus christ, no,” his cheeks warm, and he can feel the way her fingers are rubbing the back of his neck. “happy. you’re different here.”

“only when you’re the one here with me,” she presses a kiss to his cheek before stepping back. “now get in the shower. we are not missing latitudes.”

✮✮✮

lynn talks so much during the uber ride to the ferry port. she does it with a big grin on her face, and harry can tell that she’s genuinely excited about their night he had planned. she spends the entire drive discussing the menu and comparing it to yelp reviews, and when they’re on the ferry, she tells him stories about coming here with her grandma while her fingers toy with the small pendant that hangs from the gold chain around her neck.

the two talk all the way through two appetizers and a bottle of wine. harry lets lynn order everything for them because she was the one who wanted to come in the first place, and also because she had spent so much time dissecting the menu. honestly, he didn’t really care what he ate, as long as she was having everything she wanted.

their table was right on the beach, and he had a perfect view of the sun starting to set right behind lynn. harry was sure of only two things at this moment. lynn looks breathtaking in her pretty blue dress, especially during sunset, and he absolutely adores hearing her voice. harry thinks he could hear her talk forever and ever.

she tells him the story from the picture of her and elena with the first place certificate. it was a simple strawberry cheesecake cupcake, and the two had spent nearly a month practicing beforehand. lynn swears that they came out perfect every single time, except for the day of the contest. apparently, the first batch of icing wasn’t setting properly because she had cried too hard over the bowl.

when their mains come, harry realizes that this is the first time the two have hung out and gotten to know each other without some depressing undertone hanging around their conversation. sure, harry learned about elena last night, but the conversation was sad. here, lynn talked about her childhood with shiny eyes, and laughed with harry when he did the same with his.

“have you ever been grand gestured?” lynn asks around a forkful of seared grouper. her dish looked absolutely delicious, and harry regretted not getting it himself.

“not unless you’re counting a cheesy promposal.”

“hm,” she hums. “i’m going to have to go with no.”

“what about you?” harry picks up the wine bottle sitting in the chiller and works on refilling both of their glasses. “have you ever been grand gestured?”

“this is as close as i’ve come.”

“this is not a grand gesture,” harry stresses. he’s worried it’ll come across wrong for a moment until she laughs. “i just meant this is the bare minimum.”

“i know,” she smiles at him, and harry wishes he could take a picture of this moment and keep it tucked away inside his brain forever. “thank you for this again, harry.”

he’s a bit tipsy, and he can tell she is too by the amount of giggles leaving her mouth. harry always saw a sad lynn when she was drunk, and he can’t believe he was lucky enough to see this side of her, too.

this side was magical. there was really no other way to put it. she was the kind of woman that people write books about.

when harry gets tired of his pasta, he twirls little bites around his fork before leaning across the table and feeding it to lynn. it was probably a little immature to be doing at a restaurant like this, but he didn’t really care, and he could tell that she didn’t either by the little appreciative hums that fell around his fork everytime.

“ugh,” she groans when harry orders a slice of key lime pie for dessert. “harry, i’m going to explode!”

“s’okay,” his hand reaches across the table to pat the top of hers. “you don’t have to eat any of it.”

“of course i do. you know i love a sweet treat,” and really, he didn’t, but he does now.

their arms are wrapped around each other’s backs as they walk in through the front door of the condo. lynn immediately goes to the kitchen to get the last of their remaining wine while harry takes the bedroom to change into something a little comfier.

“more wine? where all you getting all of these?”

“been swiping them from my mom’s cabinet,” lynn’s sitting on the floor with her back leaning against the couch, and she laughs at harry’s words, the half empty bottle of wine pressed to her lips. after a sip, she stretches her arm out to harry, “c’mon. it’s our last night.”

he sits next to her, taking a gulp from the bottle before passing it back. “did you have fun tonight?”

“of course i did,” her voice is quiet, not much above a whisper. “i always have fun when we’re together.”

harry turns his head so he’s looking at her. he watches as her eyes drop to his mouth and then travel back up. a little laugh makes her hair float around her face, and as soon as harry thinks she’s leaning in, she stops with a loud ow falling from her lips.

and that’s how harry ends up sitting on the couch with lynn between his knees, working at the pinched nerve she complained about.

"jesus, you're so tight," harry mutters as his thumbs dig into the flesh of her shoulders.

"you're not the first guy to say that.”

"absolutely filthy tonight, aren't you?"

she laughs, and rests her head on her knees. a breathy moan pushes past her lips when he digs into a particularly sore area, "feels good. my neck fucking aches."

harry continues working her shoulders and neck, paying extra attention to the areas that make her breath hitch. he can’t stop looking at the way her lips part and eyebrows draw together. her head tilts back, and her neck strains, like she’s trying to stop herself from making a sound. the soft sighs and muffled whines that she does let fall from her mouth are enough to make him half hard.

he’s embarrassed by it, and really, he tries to think of anything else. if lynn knew he was feeling this way, they’d probably never speak to each other again, but her skin is just so soft and warm, and she sounded so fucking pretty. he really couldn’t help it.

“didn’t realize how much i missed this,” she murmurs with her head leaning against his knee.

“getting a massage? you know they have places for that.”

“knock it off,” he can feel her fingers pinching at his ankle. “i meant this… touching.”

harry hums. “i know what you mean.”

“what?” lynn laughs. “is seven days without taking someone to bed too long for you?”

harry hasn’t been with anyone in weeks. not since lynn had walked in on him and the girl from the bar. he wasn’t necessarily avoiding sex. it’s just that every time he’s gotten close to bringing someone home, he couldn’t stop thinking about her.

“s’different when it’s someone you care about,” he says instead.

harry can feel the way lynn stops picking at the carpet. her body stills except for her shoulders which move up with a deep breath when his fingers brush over her neck. he’s not really working out the knots in her muscle anymore. he’s just… touching.

it doesn’t last for very long because lynn is soon crawling up to sit next to him on the couch. she drapes her knees over his with a sigh on her lips and color blooming on her cheeks. her eyes are glassy when he looks into them, and her mouth is open like she’s going to say something. she doesn’t.

instead, her fingers cup his cheek, and then her mouth is pressing short, sweet kisses to his. she’s slow with it. her lips lazily sucking, and sometimes she drags her tongue slowly across his bottom lip, never letting it venture past that. harry savors her kisses, letting her do whatever she wants.

he knows it’s just fun for her. she’ll probably pull away with a giggle and say something about how it’s been so long since she’s been kissed like that. she’d press her lips against his once more and then they’d go to sleep. it was his fault for letting it feel intimate. with every suck of her mouth, he felt the want for her grow hot in his belly. she was just so perfect.

her lazily kisses pick up a little more pace until they’re feverish. she sucks and licks and harry groans when he feels her teeth nip at his lips. he thinks he possibly couldn’t get even more turned on than he is right now and then she’s straddling his lap, her knees tightly pressed at the sides of his thighs.

“fuck,” she gasps into his mouth as soon as he feels her against him. harry can’t even think straight. the warmth of her has his brain going foggy and his heart racing in a way that should probably be concerning. all it took was one roll of her hips, and he was a pathetic, whining mess beneath her.

"maybe you'd like a reward for all of your hard work?" she breathes into his mouth as she grinds down against him.

"i hope it's that mouth," the pad of his thumb brushes across her lips. they’re swollen and shiny with their spit. "y'know how much i like kissing you. still sweet from dessert, too.”

"how does my throat sound?" harry thinks that he’s heard her wrong, but then she parts her lips and takes his thumb into her mouth, sucking hard.

he can’t help the way he groans at the sight in front of him. her pretty blue dress all the way up to her thighs with her red lips wrapped around his thumb. she is going to kill him.

when she opens her mouth and sticks out her tongue, harry pushes his thumb further back before pressing it down right at the back of her mouth. she gags at the intrusion, looking down at him with big, teary eyes.

"don't think you could fit all of me in there," he pushes down a few more times just to see the way her eyes water over, and then he lets his thumb smear the thick saliva pooling at the corners of her mouth down her chin and all the way to her chest.

"wanna find out?"

he hums, leaning forward. "how bad do you want it?"

she laughs a little, the air from her mouth fanning across his face. "i don't beg, harry. especially not for you. don’t you see that?”

"oh really?" he pulls her into a searing kiss, letting his fingers slide all the way around to the back of her neck until they’re threaded in her hair. harry grabs a fistful of the soft strands and pulls her mouth away from his while his other hand nudges her leg over so she’s back sitting next to him. "that's too bad, blondie."

his lips sponge soft, wet kisses from her mouth down to her shoulders, and then back up. he angles her head so he can trail them up the front of her throat all the way to right below her ear. he lets his teeth graze at the soft skin until she’s letting out a shaky breath and pushing his face away.

"god, harry," he thinks she's going to cave. "i know you're practically a teenager, but you don't have to try and mark me up like one."

"didn't realize turning thirty meant you can't have any fun," harry bites back.

"i am not-" he presses his lips to hers, swallowing down whatever else she was going to say. he thinks if he had to spend one more second without his mouth on hesr, he’d die. "you're lucky you're pretty."

"you think i'm pretty?" he's got a teasing grin on his face.

"don't be annoying. look at you.” and that was it. he knew exactly how to get under her skin.

"do you think i'm prettiest in those yellow swim shorts you put in my suitcase?" he’s leaning in so his nose is nudging hers. lynn’s face flushes and she opens her mouth to speak but closes it. "don't get all shy on me now. i've felt you staring all day."

she scoffs, hands coming up to push at harry’s chest. "you wish."

"maybe i do," a kiss. "wore them just for you after all."

lynn fists his t-shirt, bringing his mouth back to hers. they kiss like they’ve been starved of each other for weeks. harry lets his touch slide up her calf, and his fingers caress the back of her knee.

"harry," her words are soft. a whimper.

"evelyn," harry’s fingers push higher, running all the way up to the inside of her thigh and back down. each time his touch gets closer until he’s thumbing at the cotton edge of her underwear. "what's the matter, blondie? you've gone all quiet on me."

"please," is all she says. it’s so quiet, harry barely catches it over the sound of his heart thumping in his ears.

"what was that?"

"you heard me.”

"i don't think i did."

"please, harry," she rolls her eyes at him, but harry sees right through it.

"please what?" his thumb slides a little under her underwear where he could feel the heat pooling. "are you still all achy?"

lynn nods with a whine in her throat and she turns her head to try and hide the pink flush in her cheeks. looking at her is practically intoxicating.

"gonna tell me where so i can make it better?"

when she doesn’t answer, he squeezes her shoulder, "here?"

her head shakes.

“hmm..” his fingers trail to her neck. “here?”

another shake.

“what about here?” he says as his fingers pinch back at her calf.

lynn groans as she takes his hand, pressing his fingers against her cloth covered center. "here, harry."

"poor, baby," harry murmurs against the crook of her neck. his finger is only gently running against the dampness of her underwear. enough to make her whine, but not enough to give her much relief. "got yourself all worked up over what? little old me?"

"you're ridicu-" a moan from deep in her chest cuts her off when harry thumbs at her clit. she’s looking at him with wide eyes and a heaving chest. he’s not sure if she didn’t expect him to actually touch her, or if she wasn’t expecting to sound so loud.

"here's what i think," he’s only looking at her, his hand back to barely touching her. "you like to act all tough, but it's quite the opposite, really. my sweet honey just needs someone to take care of her, doesn’t she?"

"y-yes.”

he adds a little bit of pressure. a treat for giving him what he wanted. "wanna hear you say it.”

lynn doesn’t answer, and harry tsks before pulling away from her. “nothing? what a shame?”

"i need someone to take care of me," she rushes out like she was so desperate for his touch to be back on her. and what kind of man would harry be if he didn’t listen?

"who?" he pushes further. she's looking at him with furrowed brows. "who do you need to take care of you? to make it all better?"

"you," she cries, her voice broken and needy. "need you to make it better. please, harry.”

"there you go," he praises her with a few kisses to her face. "c’mere, baby."

he tugs her hand so she’s seated in between his legs with her back pressed to his chest. she spreads her legs over his when he nudges her with his knee, and then his fingers find the hem on the pretty blue dress to bunch it at her waist.

"being so good f'me," he kisses her neck while he lets his fingers travel over the plush flesh of her tummy. sure, he felt her like this every night, but this was different. "don't wanna do anything you don't want to, okay? just have to tell me if you want to stop."

"okay," she rushes out. "just... please."

"such good manners," he murmurs against her skin. "think you deserve a little reward."

harry wishes he could forever hear the sound she made when he first dipped his fingers in the front of her underwear. he never imagined her to be so noisy, so loud, but with each stroke of his fingers came whines and moans and whimpers so filthy, they would make the devil look away.

his hand is cramping against the restricting fabric, so he pushes her ruined underwear down her legs, leaving her to kick them the rest of the way off, before moving her hand to the back of her thigh and instructing her to hold herself open for him.

“you’re so fucking hot when you listen, y’know that?” lynn whines at his words and squirms against him as his fingers slowly make a mess of her, watching the way her arousal strings between his fingers. harry’s breathing stops when he catches the perfect view of her. all spread open and glistening. just for him.

harry’s thumb rubs circles against her clit while the rest of his fingers move all the way down, teasing at her entrance. he never pushes in further than his fingertip before he moves them back up and starts again. he does this until she’s so wet that he knows it has to be dripping down onto the couch, and then he slowly pushes a finger in.

lynn’s head is tilted back against his shoulder, and he sponges kisses to the part of her neck that she has bared to him.

“do you think y’can come from this?” he murmurs against her skin. “i know it’s-”

“yes,” she’s quick to breathe out. “god, yes. you’ve got me so fucking horny right now. i’ll be the easiest you’ve ever had.”

and she’s right. once harry moves his free hand from her waist to her center to give her a bit more stimulation, she’s a goner. her moans and whimpers turn into high pitched whines, and her back arches away from him. he can feel her clenching on his fingers, and all it takes is one more curl and she’s nearly convulsing.

harry’s fingers offer lazy touches until she’s whining and snapping her legs together. his lips press warm, encouraging kisses against her neck and shoulders and really, anywhere they could reach. lynn melts in to him, her face falling in the crook of his neck. little giggles tickle his skin as he pulls her dress down to cover her back up.

“so perfect, evy,” he whispers. he expects another laugh or maybe a bashful shove, but instead she’s quick to stand up and head for the front door. “wait.”

"i- um, sorry i just," she clears her throat, and then. "i need some air."

"lynn-" the door slams, and harry’s left wondering what exactly he did wrong.

✮✮✮

harry: im sorry

harry: i shouldn’t have let myself get so carried away

harry: i don’t know what else to say but i am so sorry.

lynn shuts off her phone and slips it into her pocket before quietly opening up the door to the bedroom. all of their stuff was packed up. only an outfit that she had picked earlier in the day was left on top of her suitcase in a nice neat pile. the huge mess she had made in the bathroom before dinner was all packed up into her toiletry bag, and when she stepped a bit closer, she could see harry stretched out under the covers all the way on the other side of the bed. he was such a gentleman.

she felt so embarrassed when she found herself calling her aunt to let her into her condo. she didn’t mean to run out on harry the way she did, but once everything started to feel a little bit too real, she didn’t know what else to do. what was she supposed to say? i actually haven’t let anyone touch me like that in over half a decade, but yeah, we can call it two friends just helping each other out.

her aunt offered her a shower and a change of clothes and then sat with lynn on the bathroom floor while she cried so hard, she nearly threw up. aunt cece rubbed her back while she dry heaved over the toilet bowl, and then she sat and listened while lynn told her all about their fake arrangement.

“isn’t that pathetic?” lynn had said once she was finished.

aunt cece only sighed, “i think it’s more pathetic that you’re crying this hard over here instead of just telling him how you feel.”

and once aunt cece mentions that she thinks that harry likes her in a way that’s more than just platonic, lynn starts thinking that maybe letting him know about her feelings wouldn’t be the worst thing in the world.

they’d spend more alone time together once they got home. lynn would probably invite him to the bakery on a sunday where she could show him everything elena had helped her create. she’d send him home with loaves of bread and all of the muffins his heart desires.

maybe he’d let her watch him paint. they could spend sunny afternoons in the park with a picnic and a canvas. she’s only ever been artistic in the kitchen, but she’d definitely try to paint something for harry. it’d probably end up terrible, but he’d keep it. maybe even hang it up in his house. she knows she’d do the same. covering her walls in harry’s art just because they were made from him.

long nights would be spent in between her sheets, where he’d give her the best orgasms she’s ever had in her entire life (just like he did tonight). and then maybe, he’d let her touch him, too.

“he called me evy,” lynn told her aunt. it was the very phrase that had her running, but this time a smile forms on her face when she thinks of it. “i told him about evelyn, but not evy.”

it was a nickname her grandmother had given her. everyone had called the older woman evie, and so she called lynn, evy. she had said she wanted her granddaughter to feel like her own person, and the name stuck.

the first time her dad called her evy after her grandmother's passing lynn cried so hard she threw up in her front yard. it didn't feel right coming from peter, and even when luke wrapped her in all the love he could muster, pressing kisses to her face and promising evy that everything would be okay night after night, it still felt wrong. it was like there was an itch that could only be scratched by her grandma's voice. and now harry's.

“maybe she sent him to you,” her aunt’s fingers smoothed her hair away from her face before kissing her head. “go see him.”

harry looks up from his phone when he hears lynn step into the small room. “i’m so fucking sorry, lynn.”

his voice is raw and scratchy, and the thought of him crying over what she did to him makes her heart break. she climbs into the bed, sitting with her feet underneath her. “you’ve got nothing to be sorry for.”

“but, i-”

“nothing, harry,” she stresses."you didn't do anything wrong. i just... i get in my own head sometimes. i'm sorry i left the way i did."

"it’s okay," he rolls over so he's facing her. his hand covers hers. "you can talk to me when you feel like that, lynn."

"the guy i dated before my last, he was," she clears her throat. "he was a friend. well, he is a friend and i think..."

she doesn't know how to say what she wants. lynn thinks dating her friend was one of the best decisions she's ever made. that relationship happened nearly a decade ago and she still secretly wishes that she was selfish and asked him to stay when he came to her door.

well, she used to wish. she hasn’t thought about it in a while.

she thinks that maybe her and harry could be like that. or they could try to be like that. they were friends. they knew each other and she was comfortable with him. comfortable enough to let his hand go up her dress. her cheeks warm at the thought.

she'll tell him that being with luke ruined their friendship and she was never close with him again. lynn never really minded the way luke slipped so easily from her life, but she’s terrified that the same would happen with harry. she really likes having him around.

she’s going to tell him regardless, and perhaps she’ll make him promise that trying wouldn’t ruin anything. that if their relationship went south, they’d still have their friendship to fall back on.

"i think that, um," she closes her eyes and harry squeezes her hand. “um, well-”

"it's okay. i'm still hung up on my ex, too. what happened between us doesn't have to mean anything."

oh.

"okay," she breathes, trying to make sure she didn’t look as devastated as she fucking felt. "good. that’s what i was going to say."

harry sighs, "i haven't been able to stop thinking about him recently, if i'm being honest."

shut up! shut up! shut up! shut up!

"why don't you tell me about him?" she gets under all of the covers, an excuse to pull herself away from him. "since you know about mine."

lynn doesn’t really know why she asks, but she did. so, she listens to harry talk about his stupid ex named oliver with a huge smile on her face. like she could not be more elated to be hearing about how much he loves him if she tried. lynn wipes his tears when he talks about how mean he was to the boy when they were in high school, and even holds his hand when he hiccups about how much he misses him.

“you should reach out to him,” she says, letting her fingers card through his hair.

“you think so?” harry sniffs.

“yeah,” lynn hums. “it might be good for both of you.”

when lynn mentions it, she doesn’t expect him to do it right then and there, but he does. he pulls out facebook messenger, and she has to pretend not to notice the way that oliver jones was the only saved search.

maybe they’ll meet up, oliver will want nothing to do with him. harry will have a cleared conscious and he'll come back to lynn. she’ll go to therapy as soon as the plane’s wheels touch down in westchester, so when he ultimately comes knocking at her door, she’ll be better. good for him. yeah, she thinks. that will totally happen.

she clings on to whatever little sliver of hope she had left because that stupid scenario was the only thing keeping her from bursting in to tears.

when lynn looks over at harry, he’s tapping away on his phone screen. the dim light illuminates his face, and she decides if that moment were to ever come around, she’d be selfish. just that once.

✰✰✰✰

a/n: this felt like sooo much information but! part six sooon (hopefully by the end of next week)

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bluecapsicum · 1 year ago

Text

Summer skies illustrations for my daily meteorological fiction project, Reports From Unknown Places About Undescribable Events (Twitter, Instagram, Mastodon).

Keep reading for the companion texts.

June 27th - We report: very hot today, so that at this late hour, the ground radiates heat though the sun is already low. Our expert, too, radiates heat, and we wonder when their skin got darker (today? No, over the course of this month, little by little every day). The sky is so big.

July 10th - We report about watching clouds go by and their shadows running across the fields; about stepping in and out of those shadows as they move, following them, sometimes walking ahead of them. On top of a hill, we are surprised to notice that the clouds are still not within reach.

July 26th - We report: the warm notes of the sun are remaining suspended in the air tonight. It is late, and the sunset is well underway; the streets are quiet, so it feels a little bit solemn, to witness the day going out like this. Counting down the last few moments of light.

August 1st - We report many months when we looked forward to the full moon, but missed it by a few days each time. This time, we found it by chance, felt a pang in our chest when it showed up through the clouds; suddenly emotional about it still being here, even though so much was changing.

August 4th - We report about the sunshine coming through the leaves like stained glass, creating shades of green within the spectrum of light that we did not realise existed. The afternoon is coming to an end at a very slow pace, watching the sun come around the forest in between branches.

August 7th - We report about the clouds that look the most solid in the sky - for how fragile and ever-changing clouds are, that is. There is a landscape there, one that nobody can ever walk, but it exists in this specific time and place. Sometimes, we wish we could freeze them like that.

August 9th - We report that we slept through the storm, but our expert told us all about it in the morning, how it caught the sky and did not let go until long after even thunder had ceased. How the lightning lasted for less than a second when it struck, but it touched every shadow each time.

August 10th - We report: we have lived hard and well every day and night since we were born, and we try hard to remember this in the pit of our heart every morning. That the planet spins, that we live there, that the sky is new every day, and that we have a lot more to do under that sky.

August 13th - We report about specks of dust suspended in smoke, or snowflakes caught in car headlights, or maybe stars in a cloudy sky. The scale is slightly different for all of these options, but in the end, they all look alike. We slowly make our way across the constellations. Goodnight.

September 5th - We report: the clouds are collapsing, over and over again. This kind of rain falls regardless of the seasons, it does not care about summer or autumn nearly as much as we do, about the days crossed out on our calendar. The afternoon goes on, soaked to the bone.

#drawing #illustration #digital art #digital #artists on tumblr #clouds #sky #night #weather #stars #thunderstorm #lightning #rain #nature #image description in alt text #reports #weather report

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earthry · 1 year ago

Note

hello glad you are back :3 could I request hcs for going to a fancy ball w papa? ty ilysm 💓

Thank you so much! I had lots of fun with this, please enjoy! I imagine this to be somewhat of a Regency Era AU <3

sfw but a smidgen of spice at secondo's part, fluff, regency era-ish

Primo

Balls aren't usually his thing-- not anymore, at least. Maybe when he was younger but now in age, he's been and seen hundreds to the point that a fancy ball is just another fancy ball to him.

For you however, they are novelty and a wonder. Something sparkly, something new, something to be excited about and look forwards to. And fuck if that's not cute and incredibly endearing to see. Once you enter his life, he'll never ever voice boredom or disinterest for balls ever again.

Actually, you make him interested in balls again-- if not only to see you at the center of attention, beaming his way.

He's the type to sip at his wine while he watches you have the time of your life across the room-- he doesn't see any point in socializing himself, but if you urge him to, he'll mingle for a little while.

After the ball, he'll escort you home and ask if you had a good time-- the answer is always yes. He'll kiss you goodnight, sweet and gentle under the crescent moon that leaves the both of you breathless, before bidding you a farewell until the morning.

"I'll see you in the morning, tesoro. I'll dream sweetly of you tonight."

Secondo

Spares no expenses on you-- whether it be accessories, makeup, outfits, you name it-- he'll get it for you. What's the use of money if he can't frivolously spend it on the people he loves?

Whether it be a ball gown or a suit, everything you wear is perfectly tailored to your form. If you get a dress or skirt, it has pockets!

An expert at the social game at balls, always knows what to say and exactly how to say it. His presence is most coveted and he'll almost always have an invitation to even the most exclusive of balls.

You'll always be his plus one-- there's never a doubt. Unless you have no interest in attending, you can practically consider an invitation to him as an invitation to you. However, you needn't worry because plenty of invitations of your own will come your way because others know that if you attend, he surely will as well. Never one without the other.

Protective; if he has business or other things to attend to at a ball, one or more of his ghouls will always be nearby to make sure nothing happens to you. This is with your consent of course. If you don't feel comfortable with it, he'll at the very least make sure you're equipped and armed with your own personal dagger concealed in your sleeve or somewhere on your person.

As is proper, he'll always make sure to personally escort you home. The kiss you share before you depart is deep and meaningful-- but no less dirty or charged. Pulling you into his lap and claiming your lips with his, he'll roll his hips up to meet yours just to hear the little hitch in your breath. It's usually a game between the two of you; who can get the other more worked up by the time it's time to say goodbye. Most of the time he wins, smirking as you let out a soft little whimper when the carriage finally stops in front of your estate. He'll give you one last kiss before huskily bidding you adeiu.

"Time to leave, amore mio. Think of me tonight, si?"

Terzo

This man definitely 'pre-games' before the ball-- manicures and facials and any type of beauty self-care under the sun. It's a whole spa day the day of the ball, he shows up at your doorstep and kisses the back of your hand before whisking you off to get absolutely pampered.

The two of you have matching outfits probably, the same theme or color or style. You're both the center of attention at balls, charming the ladies and men. Terzo usually keeps a possessive arm around your waist, leaning in close to gossip or whisper some kind of comment that only you have the luxury of being privy to.

Terzo is ever so attentive to you and your needs during balls-- always checking in for your comfort, asking if you need a drink or snack, making sure you know that the two of you can leave at any time you want.

Despite what a flirt this man is, he'll only ever have eyes for you and anyone with eyes can see that. He's a little bit of a prima donna and likes having your attention on him-- but he'll give you your space if you request it.

Whenever there's dancing involved, the two of you always captivate onlookers. The way he twirls you (or vice versa if you prefer leading), the looks the two of you exchange as your bodies move in tandem to the music. When the two of you take to the dance floor, usually it becomes just the two of you, as others will stop just to watch.

Dropping you back home after the party is Terzo's least favorite part-- because he has to say goodbye to his most beloved. You'll spend at least twenty more minutes down the block from your estate just to make out in the carriage until one of the coachmen impatiently interrupts and asks if you're ready to go. With one last parting kiss, Terzo will see you off with a promise to call on you again in the morning.

"Till tomorrow, beloved. Don't miss me too much, bene?"

Copia

The two of you are anxious beans that find comfort and company in each other at social functions and especially balls. You'll always have an eye out for him and him, you. Eventually, you'll just start attending balls and other events together.

The first time you meet, he's hiding in host's library-- the very same place you had decided to hide in as well. You bump into each other what starts as profuse apologies from each side blooms into a long lasting friendship and companionship.

The day he asks you to come with him as his official plus one, his date, you can't stop smiling which flusters him and makes him bashfully but oh so insanely happy.

After a while, balls become a favorite to the two of you because it would always be full of shenanigans and fun. The two of you together and loitering by the refreshments table and stuffing yourselves full of snacks, giggling to yourselves as you chat and peek into his pocket to see that he's smuggled a rat friend in, touring the gardens outside where it's less crowded and hold hands until you inevitably share a kiss under the gazebo by the lake.

When the night comes to a close, he'll see you home with you cuddled at his side on the carriage ride back. Hushed and sweet tones as you decompress together and he'll tell you that he enjoyed every moment he had with you. He'll crack a few jokes that leave the two of you giggling and by the time it's time to leave, you're left with a warm and fuzzy feeling from head to toe. His kiss goodnight promises more in the future; it's soft and resolute. He holds you in his arms afterwards and you sigh contently and bask in the moment before he rests his forehead against yours to say goodbye.

"First thing tomorrow, i'll be outside your window throwing little stones, si? Like uh-- who was that fellow? Row-me-o? Wha- cuore mio, why are you laughing?"

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clownprincehoeshi · 3 months ago

Text

Parallel Hearts - Chapter 10

Synopsis: Never in your wildest dreams you imagined that you’ll meet your ult bias. Maybe you finally have your shot at love and happiness. Or not.

Pairing: fem reader x idol Jungkook fem reader x idol Mingyu fem reader x idol Hoshi

Genre: Fluff, Smut, Angst

Warnings: Kissing-Nudity-Sex 18+-Harrassment-Stalking-Death mentions-Cheating

Word count: 10.453

Previous chapter

Masterlist

Rebloging is important and much apreciated. Leave your comments, oppinions, ideas, whatever you like. My inbox in open. Kpop writers, let’s be moots?

Things were awkward at dinner that night. You wanted to just stay in your room and sleep, but Hana didn’t let you be so petty.

Even though you knew you had feelings for Soonyoung, you were not sure how deep they went and you didn’t really know what to do about them, because you promised yourself to never fall in love again or get involved again.

You also didn’t know that he felt pretty much the same, maybe a little more confused and in denial about his feelings.

He knew he had feelings for you and that he found you ridiculously sexy.

Right after dinner, the guys decided to watch a movie. Jun dragged you to the couch and made you sit next to him for cuddles.

He felt you were not in a good mood so he wanted to keep you close and safe. You thought you will tell him tomorrow about the conversation you had with Hoshi.

The couch was in an U shape and everyone was sitting and laying on it. You could feel the whole movie Soonyoung’s eyes on you.

The back of your head was burning, you felt really conflicted and flustered.

Jun: Are you ok?

Y/N: Not really, but I don’t want to talk about it today.

Jun: Ok, whenever you’re ready.

Y/N: Thanks, Juni!

And you ended that with a kiss on his head.

You couldn’t miss the way Hoshi was watching you that moment. He looked almost… jealous? You were sure you were wrong.

As soon as the movie ended, you said goodnight and ran to your room, not waiting to hear a response from anyone.

After some minutes, Hana came into the room.

Hana: Ok, let’s talk.

Y/N: Not today. Pleeeaase!

Hana: Like…Soonyoung looked like a sad puppy all night. What are you planning on doing about this situation?

Y/N: I don’t know, I’d rather not do anything and it will go away with time.

Hana: Stupid, but whatever.

Y/N: Why, what would you do?

Hana: First, I would stop being a coward who’s running away from love.

You scoff and move to the window to watch the moon.

Y/N: Pffff love? Let’s say that’s what I’m feeling. How do I know it’s what he’s feeling? We know he doesn’t want to get into something serious anytime soon. He said it himself, he said he’s not ready for that. What f it’s just fun for him? What if I give him a chance and after he gets what he needs and he gets bored, I end up broken again? Then what, start from the beginning again and again?

Hana: Nobody knows what could happen. And I really doubt that he is that type of guy to just look for an easy fuck. Like come on, he’s so harmless. Even when he gets angry and yells at his members it makes you laugh you ass off.

Y/N: Exactly! I can’t even take his anger seriously. Don’t you think that’s an issue? How could I take his words, his confession seriously?

Hana: Girl, you’re talking nonsense right now. I thought you were smarter than that. Is it the Sun? Did it fry your neurons? I think that you laughing when he gets angry is the cutest thing ever, I wish I had that with a guy.

Y/N: You know what? This conversation will end up frying my brain, let’s just talk about it another day. I just want to sleep and start work again in two days. There is so much to do for the next concerts, we should focus on that.

In the morning, you made sure to wake up really early and be in the parking lot first, so you could get a seat in the car in the front and next to someone else, not Hoshi.

You decided you will try to stay away from him for a while.

It was not easy thought, because you worked together. You had to see him every day. You took the plane together, had all the meetings together, all the rehearsals, and almost all dinners after the show.

You would catch him looking at you with sad eyes and pouty lips. You thought he hasn’t changed at all from his baby pictures. The same pouty cute face.

You were sure you never met anyone cuter and more adorable than him and it was driving you crazy.

You were sure he was doing things on purpose just to get a reaction from you. He would bump into you “by accident” while in a crowded space when there were rehearsals or shows going on.

He would just look you right in the eyes and say sorry, then run away like he got shy.

You were having a couple concerts in France and you were in Paris for the week. The company decided that it was good for publicity to have the boys attend some shows for the fashion week.

Somehow, you ended up going too at the YSL show where Jeonghan was a brad ambassador. You had to go shopping for this and pick some fancy clothes and accessories.

At the event, you chose to wait a little outside to see the boys arriving. It felt thrilling. The crowd was huge and so noisy, everyone brought albums and photocards, hoping they’ll get signed.

You remember when you were like them few years back, dreaming of seeing your idols. Now you are working for them and it gave you some encouragement that your life is good and you’ll be fine.

Maybe dating an idol was never a good idea for you. While you were deep in your thoughts, you felt someone pat your shoulder. You turn to see an unfamiliar face. A guy who seemed to be a paparazzi.

Paparazzi: Excuse me, do we know each other? I feel like I know you.

Y/N: Uhhh, no, I don’t think so. You don’t look familiar.

Paparazzi: Wait, were you in Italy like 2 years ago?

Y/N: I was, yeah. Why?

Paparazzi: Damn, I still have a good memory.

Hana: So how do you know her?

Paparazzi: It’s a crazy story, but I was paid to follow you on your vacation and take pictures.

Y/N: Ohh? People would do anything for money, uh?

Paparazzi: Hey, was just doing my job and the money were really good. But I remember that just a few of the pictures were published, I never found out what happened with the rest.

Y/N: Do you happen to still have the rest of the photos?

Paparazzi: No, the guys who paid me made sure I deleted everything after. But I could just tell you what they were about.

Y/N: Yes!!

Paparazzi: Well, it showed you and your boyfriend holding hands, kissing, stuff like that. What was the deal, was like one of you cheating on your spuse? Why would someone want normal photos like those?

Y/N: Oh, no, nothing like that. Just a stalker ex, but it was all solved in the end and he stopped with his harassing.

Paparazzi: Glad to hear that. Well I need to go and photograph some celebrities now. Take care!

Y/N: You too!

Hana: That was weird. What a strange coincidence.

Y/N: Indeed. Weird.

You could barely see the boys behind the crowd of screaming fans, so you decided it was better to go inside the venue and find your seats.

It was an old theatre where all guests were sitting all around the huge place. the models would walk between the seatings. The lighting show was really something, and the music went to perfect with it.

You were like a little kid, fascinated by this new world you were discovering. It also made you feel somewhat happy that Soonyoung was there too.

He was doing everything in his power not to look at you too often, because he was afraid it would be obvious and raise suspicions.

But Jeonghan really wanted your team to be there and just have a fun evening doing something different.

When the show was over, everyone came around the boys to take photos and interviews. There were other idols invited there, Jackson, Bam Bam, Eunwoo, Karina, Sana.

Your eyes immediately went to Hoshi when he started interacting with Karina. You remember they filmed for a show together, but you couldn’t help the jealousy that was creeping up.

Afterall, you could not compare to her. She was so pretty, charming and she’s in the same industry as him. You’re sure she would be a better match for him than you.

Yeah, of course you dated idols and you weren’t ugly, but look at her. She’s famous and rich, you’re not.

Y/N: Hana,let’s go, ok?

Hana: But we decided we’ll have dinner all of us together after this and discuss some more about the show in 3 days.

Y/N: Ugh, fuck! You’re right, it’s important to decide tonight what are we going to do about the videos we’ll chose for the big wall.

Hana: Let’s have a drink then we’ll head with our team to the restaurant, ok?

After one drink you felt a little tipsy. You thought you barely had any alcohol in your cocktail, but guess not.

The guys were still mingling with organisers, press people, celebrities and even models.

Hana: Stop being so obvious! Those girls won’t eat him.

Y/N: What if they do? He looks like a tiny delicious cute cake. They have eyes.

Hana: God, you’re an idiot in love.

As you two were whispering net to your colleagues, some guys that were much older than you came over to talk to you.

“Hello there, can we offer you girls a drink? We’re William and David, nice to meet you!”

Hana: Hello, thank you for your offer, but we are on our way out soon.

William: Oh, no way! Why leave so early?

Y/N: We have dinner reservations and need to meet our friends.

Davis: We won’t hear that. Tell you what, we have a better idea. How about you join us on our yacht and continue the party there?

These guys were becoming annoying and you just hate people who won’t take your first answer and will keep insisting.

You look around, trying to not get angry, because you know if they won’t shut up soon you’ll make them eat their words.

While you’re trying to distract yourself and letting your friends manage the situation, you catch Mingyu staring your direction.

He shakes his head, trying to figure out if you’re ok. He could see your annoyed face and they old guys who looked a little drunk all over your group.

Then you see him walk in your direction and you gulp. What is he doing? There is press here.

He puts his arms around the two men’s shoulders, towering over them.

Mingyu: Hello! How are you, my friends?

William: Oh, excuse me, we were having a conversation here. Who are you?

Mingyu: You don’t remember me? Come on, drink with me!

And he drags them to the bar with his strong arms, the men not realising what’s going on. He saved you. Once again. A little giggle went trough you, as you were watching him trying his best to make the men feel uncomfortable, giving them some of their own medicine.

You took advantage and left to the restaurant and after half an hour, the rest of the people arrived also. You wanted to thank Mingyu in person so you gave him a sign with your hand to follow you, after you all ordered your food.

You found a place outside where you sat on a bench.

Mingyu: Are you ok?

Y/N: Yes, just wanted to thank you for that.

Mingyu: Oh, don’t mention it. I will always help a friend in need.

Y/N: We’re friends?

Mingyu: I hope we are. You don’t want to?

Y/N: Umm…I don’t want to be enemies and we work together. So we kind of need to be friends.

Mingyu: I guess I’m not forgiven yet.

Y/N: Sorry, was not trying to sound rude. I forgave you, but it feels weird.

Mingyu: Yeah, true. But how are you after��everything that happened?

Y/N: Good, I think. It’s been some months since we broke up. It’s been tough at first, but now I can say that I’m over it and happy. What about you?

Mingyu: Um, yeah. I am fine. It left me disappointed in myself that I wasn’t more careful about the people around me. I can be pretty naïve and stupid. Anyway, it’s in the past and it’s done.

Y/N: You think we can be friend just like we used to be before?

Mingyu: You bet! I’m ready to start over.

Y/N: I think I’m ready too. I miss you. Our friendship

He takes your hand is his, while looking ahead at some trees. A moment of silence follows. This was a decisive moment that helped you realise your feelings for him were not there anymore. He felt just as a friend and you were glad.

Mingyu: Let’s get back inside, don’t want your boyfriend get the wrong idea.

Y/N: My what?

He just have you a wink and ran away giggling.

Y/N: Yaa, Kim Mingyu!

Seungcheol: What are you two up to? Come on, food is here!

Mingyu: Yes, dad!

Soonyoung avoided your eyes for the rest of the night. He felt sad and angry. He couldn’t believe Mingyu would try to get back with you after he said he is over you and there can’t be anything between you anymore. After he told Mingyu he liked you and asked for advice.

But Mingyu played with him before, he could do it again, right? He decided to have a work with him after dinner.

22:38

Kwon Hoshi: Mingyu ya, let’s take the same car to the hotel, I need to talk to you alone

22:41

Mingoo: Why are you texting me, I’m right in front of you

22:41

Kwon Hoshi: None of your business, I do what I want

As soon as they were in the car alone, Hoshi started talking without breathing.

Hoshi: What the hell are you trying to do now, get back with her? Are you trying to play games with me again, selling me lies? What the fuck, Mingyu, what’s wrong with you? You said it’s over over and you know how I feel about her.

Mingyu: Hold on, tiger! You’re jumping to conclusion again. See if you’re not paying attention to the people around you? Things happen and things are said and they go over your head.

Hoshi: Just answer my questions

Mingyu: Everything I told you is true, it’s over between me and her and she and I made that very clear tonight. We shook hands and decided to leave the past behind and be friends like we used to be. And how could you think I would try to hurt you?

Hoshi: What was I supposed to think? You two were in love, she won’t give me a chance and you were gone like 20 minutes tonight, alone.

Mingyu: Awww, little tiger is jealous. Don’t be, you’re safe with me. But can’t say the same about other men, strangers. She’s a beautiful and smart woman, men will try to win her over. Didn’t you see the two guys who were trying to offer her drinks at the event?

Hoshi: No, what guys?

Mingyu: Don’t worry about them, they had no chance. Now tell me what’s your plan on breaking her walls down. Because I just know she’s very strongheaded and she is closed off now.

As Soonyoung got into bed, he was a little buzzed from the alcohol and from Mingyu hyping him up so he needed to hear from you. He just misses you. Even your little bickering.

00:13

Soonyoung: Y/N!!

00:14

Y/N: Soonyoung!

Soonyoung: What are you doing?

Y/N: Texting you

Soonyoung: Besides that

Y/N: Lying in bed, trying to sleep

Soonyoung: Who were those guys?

Y/N: What guys?

Soonyoung: The guys from the fashion event who were hitting on you

Y/N”: Oh, grandpa and grandfather. I have no idea, they just invited us on their yacht

Soonyoung: Do you want to go?

Y/N: On their yacht?

Soonyoung: Yeah. Did you like them?

Y/N: Ridiculous to think that, they were my dad’s age, maybe older.

Soonyoung: I wouldn’t know what your’re into, you’ve rejected me, so you might not be into guys your age

Y/N: I’ve had boyfriends my age and you know some of them

Soonyoung: Don’t remind meee, you are so mean

Y/N: Don’t tell me you’re jealous

Soonyoung: You got a problem with that? I can feel whatever I want

Y/N: You shouldn’t feel jealous, I’m not your girlfriend

Soonyoung: Because you don’t want to

Y/N: You never even asked me to be

Soonyoung: Then be my girlfriend

Y/N: NO

Soonyoung: See? Mean

Y/N: Shut up

Soonyoung: You shut up

Y/N: YOU shut up, hamster

Soonyoung: Take that back!!!!!!

Y/N: Nah

Soonyoung: Why are you so annoying?

Y/N: And you like me anyway

Soonyoung: You shouldn’t make fun of my feelings…

Y/N: I’m sorry, didn’t mean to do that

Y/N: Soonyoung?

Y/N: ☹

Soonyoung felt hurt by your words. You knew he is a sensitive and impulsive guy, but you were close enough to joke like that. He decided to stop replying, worried that he might say to much or maybe become mean himself.

As he was trying to get comfortable in his bed, he heard a faint knock on his door. Thinking that he probably was not hearing well, he closed his eyes again. Then he hears knocking for a second time.

Getting out of bed, he walks to the door and checks the little visor. There you were, in your pj’s, waiting for him to open.

Soonyoung: I don’t want to talk to you, go away

You look at him and you don’t know what’s gotten into you, but you push him, step into his room and close the door behind you.

He gets quiet and just looks at you with pink cheeks and pouty mouth. That ridiculously pretty pouty mouth you can’t take your eyes of. His brows frown and he swallows hard.

You take one step. Two steps. He doesn’t realise how he’s stepping back slowly. He thinks you look beautiful like this. Furious and angry at him, but still beautiful. His heart beats so fast and he thinks you can hear it.

His legs reach his bed and he stops. You stop also, right before him. Your bodies are so close that you can feel the heat coming from him.

Y/N: Why are you ghosting me now?

Soonyoung: I don’t talk to bullies. I could be a jerk to you too, you deserve it. And I still don’t do it

Y/N: So do it! Be a jerk to me!

Soonyoung: Why would you want that?

Y/N: Like you said, I deserve it.

With that, you turned around and left his room. You left him confused and annoyed. Why did you want him to be a jerk to you? At some point he even thought you were going to kiss him.

All the way walking back to your room, your heart was beating like crazy. You don’t know when you even left your room and how you found the courage to knock on his door.

As you reach your bed, you sink into it face down and growl into the sheet.

Hana: Now what’s wrong?

Y/N: I think I am going mad.

Hana: What you mean?

Y/N: I have no idea how I ended up in Hoshi’s room 5 minutes ago.

Hana: It’s ok, it’s normal in old age.

Y/N: Fuck off! (you say, throwing a pillow at her). Just make sure to sit next to me in the car tomorrow morning, please. I can’t be around him right now.

Next morning, the whole road back to Barcelona, you kept your headphones on, music blasting in your ears. You needed a good distraction, but even that ended up not being enough to take your mind of Soonyoung.

You felt almost stupid for this, for not being able to control yourself. Yeah, you told him no, you denied him, but you keep on going back to him, replying to his silly texts, being silly with him.

You could just block him, but you practically work for him. Maybe talk to him seriously and tell him to give you space. Maybe ask Jun to talk to him? Ugh, you feel a headache coming.

Why does love have to be this difficult? Why can’t you just shut feelings before they evolve into something more? Why can’t you choose who to fall in love with? You’d chose a tree and you’d live happy and in peace forever. No drama, no disappointment, no pain.

The next few weeks of tour were to say the least, hard. But it pushed you to be even better at your work. The whole staff you interacted with had only praises for you and your team.

You tried to avoid spending time outside work hours around Hoshi. He did text you a few times to check on you and you only replied with short answers, not asking him anything back. You hoped he will read the room and give you time.

You were in Milano right now, few days of preparations and events before the first concert. You get a call from Mingyu.

Mingyu: My dear friend, ex girlfriend, Y/N, I have some invitations for you and your friends for the afterparty for the Dior show tomorrow evening.

Y/N: Oh, now I find out I was your girlfriend? What an honour, mister sir.

Mingyu: Why of course, miss lady. So what do you say? Wanna get drunk tomorrow?

Y/N: Of course, why not.

Mingyu: But..

Y/N: What?

Mingyu: Jungkook will be there with Eunwoo.

Y/N: Oh, fucking hell!

Mingyu: Your team will be close to us, you’ll be right with the staff, don’t worry. And I am sure he won’t be dumb enough to try something so publicly.

Y/N: You’re probably right. You know what’s funny?

Mingyu: What?

Y/N: I’ll be in the same room with two of my exes. Weird, isn’t it?

Mingyu: Nah, you’ll be fine, trust me on this.

Y/N: You would know, you big slut.

Mingyu: Can’t deny that hehe. So I’ll leave you go to sleep, it’s late. Make sure you look extra sexy tomorrow.

Y/N: Yeah yeah, goodnight you silly skyscraper!

You called Hana to give her the news. You knew she was having dinner with some of the members and staff. But a man answered her phone.

Y/N: Who’s this? I need to talk to Hana.

Soonyoung: I have her phone, so you can’t talk to her.

Y/N: Are you drunk?

Soonyoung: Yeah, and?

Y/N: You’ll cry out about your face being puffy tomorrow at the Dior show.

Soonyoung: Shut up, you’re not my girlfriend or my mom!

Y/N: Don’t tell me to shut up and give the phone to Hana, drunk hamster!

Soonyoung: I’ll get you for this, mark my words. You’ll be sorry for calling me hamster.

Hana: Soonyoung, give me that! Wife?

Y/N: Ugh, finally! Why was your phone with him?

Hana: I have no idea, I guess it was just on the table and he thought it was a good idea. Did you call or he called you?

Y/N: I called, to let you know that we’re going to the Dior afterparty tomorrow evening, with the team.

Hana: Wow, can’t believe I will be surrounded with celebrities again. I think I love this job.

You hear Hoshi’s voice in the background.

Soonyoung: Hana, is she upset with me?

Hana: Yeah.

Soonyoung: Nooo, that’s so saaad!

Hana: Sorry, wife, but a crying Hoshi needs a hug. (and she hangs up the call)

You missed drunk needy Soonyoung. You wanted to be there to hug him and wipe his tears off his cheeks, then kiss his eyes and give him some cake.

Now, whenever you eat cake, you think about him and how he would also enjoy having a piece of it.

Many times when you met Jun and you knew Hoshi will be there too, you brough cake for him, made by you. He never believed you when you said you made it, he always thought you bought it from a store.

You just wanted to watch his face light up every time you’d take the cake out of the box. He looked adorable stuffing his mouth with it and trying to say how good it is.

Anyway, you needed your beauty sleep, because tomorrow you needed to look your best.

In the morning you woke up alone, no Hana in sight. Ugh, is my wife slutting around?

You check your phone and only see the group chats filled with unread messages. Everyone seems to have gotten drunk last night. You feel a little sad you were not there with them, but it is what it is.

There are also texts from Soonyoung and you immediately click on his chat to read them.

22:12

Soonyoung: Dout be upsjet p;ease

Soonyoung: heeejjjjjj

Soonyoung: heyy

00:56

Soonyoung: missyoiu

He misses you. You could ignore his drunk texts, but you know that what he’s saying while drunk it’s what he really feels. Then again, doesn’t mean he’s in love.

He’s always such an i-pad kid, always joking around, rarely taking anything seriously. Except when he’s working. Of course, you can’t say you really really know him, so you can’t just jump to conclusions about him.

That’s why you’re so confused and you can’t be radical about staying away from him. And even if you know someone really well, there’s nothing to vouch they’re going to be predictable.

You’ve gotten ready for work and 30 minutes later you’re in your usual meeting room, sitting at the table, working on your laptop. Hana and another girl from your team joins, bringing breakfast.

Hana: Mornin wife!

Y/N: Mornin to you too, cheater! Where did you sleep?

Hana: Hehe! Well, you see..I kind of ended up kissing Hyunwoo from the dance team and…we went to his room after.

Y/N: Uhhh! You big slut! How could you do that, here, at your workplace where these people are treating us so kind, and respect us……without telling me how the sex was? So disrespectful!

She leans closer, over the table, gesturing you and your other colleague.

Hana: It was really good. And I don’t think it was because of how tipsy we were. Plus, he’s packing.

Y/N: Ok, no need to rub it in. It’s been months for me, it hurts, so please.

Hana: Do we need to go shopping for some dildos and vibrators?

Y/N: I have enough sex toys, silly.

Hana: Or maybe you could ask your ex to help you, if you’re not going to do anything about your crush.

Y/N: My god, Hana! Never! Oh, I forgot the gossip. Jungkook will attend the Dior show too, and I guess the party also.

Hana: You know what that means. You need to look irresistible. And by the way, I’ll be spending some time in Hyunwoo’s room after we finish work today, and my advice since you’ll have some alone time? Use those toys, girl. Unwind.

4 hours later you find yourself walking the hotel’s hallways. With your laptop in one hand and your room card in the other, you’re excited about Hana’s advice. You decided that an orgasm would help you relax, especially since tonight you will see JK.

Reaching inside your room, you take a quick shower and get comfy on the bed. You got your special box with your toys next to you. You pick the vibrator that can stimulate your g spot and your clit at the same time.

You’re feeling so hot and bothered, especially after all the last weeks spent around Soonyoung. Your mind goes straight to the week you were in Spain and how he looked with just swim pants. How he would swim in the pool and all his back muscles would contract.

How he would grip the edge of the pool with his pretty hands, strong grip. And how he would use his arms to lift himself from the water. Oh, the water. The water that was dripping over his abs down to his swim trunks, down his jaw and neck. The water dripping slowly from his strands of hair.

You’d think about how you wanted to lick that hard body of his. You kept working on your vibrator that was giving you so much pleasure right now. You so wished it was Soonyoung making you feel like this.

So wanted to feel him inside you, thrusting slowly, dragging his length deep into your walls, making you cum over and over. Feeling his lips on your breasts, sucking on them.

A knock on the door got you out of your trance. Fuck!!! You kept going, you were so close. Sweat forming on your forehead. Go away!(you whispered)

Then another knock and a call for your name.

Y/N: I’m coming, I’m coming!!! Shit!

And it was not the way you wanted to come. You had to stop. You cursed under your breath. You grabbed a silk robe you had on the bed and went to open the door.

Oh, you were pissed. You open the door to find a flustered Soonyoung standing there, almost guilty and ready to leave.

You were sure your face was pink and sweaty and you were panting.

Y/N: What? You seemed eager to talk, with all that knocking, and now you’re silent?

Soonyoung: Are you with someone? I swear I heard moaning.

Y/N: I’m all alone, Soonyoung.

Soonyoung: Oh! Oh…we’re you…

Y/N: Yeah, I was. I’m a single woman, free to masturbate if that’s what I feel like doing. You got a problem with that?

Soonyoung: Noo, I will just let you get back to what you were doing, sorry for disturbing you.

His face was flushed red and he didn’t just walk away, he ran away. You never seen him run so fast.

You felt like joking around and ask if he wanted to help, but it was not appropriate in your situation. So you kept quiet and went back to business.

Back to your toy and your fantasy about Soonyoung doing filthy things to you. It helps that you just saw him minutes ago. You could still feel his perfume lingering in the air and it drove you crazy.

You ended up cumming while moaning his name. In a way, you wish he heard you right now.

I think a nap is what I need right now before getting ready for the party.

You send a quick text to Hana and one to Jun and you go to sleep for 2 hours.

You wake up at 3 PM, getting into the shower. Meanwhile, Hana arrives to and you both help each other with your hair and outfits.

Y/N: Soonyoung caught me masturbating.

Hana: Whaaaaat??

Y/N: I was about to finish and he knocked on the door. He said he heard me and he figured out, so…

Hana: Geez, that’s..pretty hot, I have to say.

Y/N: How is that hot?

Hana: You like each other and now he’ll think about this all week. Shit, he’ll be looking at you tonight at the party and only see one thing, you touching yourself. That’s hilarious.

Y/N: It kind of is, not gonna lie.

7 PM and you were in one of the company’s car with Hana, 2 of your colleagues and one of the managers.

You were checking the reels from today’s Dior fashion show to see how handsome the boys were. The fans are so quick to edit the craziest and thirstiest reels.

You were wearing a black dress that hugged your body perfectly and dropped sensually over your breasts. You thought that you should wear your hair up in a simple ponytail, to reveal more of your shoulders and back.

Feeling very confident, you walked toward the building, presenting your names at the entrance. The inside of the building was spectacular. Old and new architecture combined, scenes displayed on the walls with thousands of lights, slow electronic music and expensive clothes.

Everything smelled and looked expensive. You start with a glass of champagne, giggling with Hana and noticing familiar faces. This time there were no outside paparazzi or fans around, so you could tell everyone was relaxed.

Hana: There’s Eunwoo. Let’s say hi.

Y/N: Hana, let’s let him come to us, he would know better what to do. Maybe it’s better for him not be seen in company of women.

Hana: You’re right. I just feel weird about it because we’ve been friends for years and he’s like my brother.

Y/N: Jungkook might also be around him, so let’s just not gather to much attention on us.

Hana: Looking like this, you think you won’t catch attention? Giiirl!

Minutes later, you’re enjoying some appetizers and you’re at the second glass, this time a cocktail. As you’re sipping your drink and look forward into the crowd, you notice someone’s eyes on you, the person not flinching, not blinking.

You choked on your drink a little and Hana asked what happened. You told her you just saw Jungkook killing you with his eyes.

She immediately turned and there he was, talking with Eunwoo and some other people.

Hana: Shit, the bastard looks even hotter after his military. Fuck that guy!

Y/N: Ewww, no thanks.

You try not to look in his direction after that, your eyes looking for Soonyoung. You missed him. And you also wanted to see his face when he sees you like this.

Hana: Let’s go mingle and look around. Let’s look at pretty men.

Y/N: Ooookkk.

Hana: Come on, let’s pretend we’re two rich bitches.

The building was huge and the event was taking place outside to. There, they had a different dj with a different music. Here, there was something more like jazz and they had tables with chairs where guests were sitting and enjoying a nice conversation and a cigar.

You saw many celebrities, models, actors, musicians, athletes. It was a little too much for you, but fun nonetheless.

You could get a glimpse of some of the members, but they didn’t see you. They were pretty busy talking to people you didn’t know and taking photos. So you continued your little adventure and walked back inside.

As you turned to walk away, Mingyu saw you and he told Jun. They decided to go look for you.

Reaching a big room, you could tell here it was where the dance was happening. And you wanted to move a bit, so you took Hana’s hand and took her in the crowd of dancing people.

Y/N: It’s been a while since I’ve had so much fun.

Hana: Me fucking too.

Soonyoung was taking pictures with Taemin right in the dancing room where you were, but you could not see him from the people gathered around them.

At some point, a little tunnel formed between Soonyoung and where you were dancing. He could see with his peripheral vision someone in a black dress dancing and it didn’t mean anything, but then when he moved his eyes he saw your face.

Coloured lights were playing on your body, hips making circling moves in the rhythm of the music. Damn, she’s not wearing a bra. Again. It all turned in slow motion again. This always happens to him when he’s mesmerised, and it doesn’t happen often.

He’s never seen you dance before. You’re out of this world, you’re glorious, breathtaking. He needs you.

He was stunned. I’ll marry her.

Taemin: What?

Taemin: Hosh! Planet Earth to Hoshi!

Taemin needed to pinch Soonyoung’s arm to get his attention.

Soonyoung: Ouch! You know I’m sensitive, hyung.

Taemin: Well I needed to make sure you were alive and well. You looked like you saw a ghost.

Soonyoung: No, I just saw my future wife.

Taemin: I thought you liked someone. Didn’t think you were a player.

Soonyoung: Nooo, it’s her. She’s here.

Taemin: My god, I want to meet this woman that has my friend around her pinky.

Soonyoung: Might introduce you later

After dancing you felt thirsty so you went to get drinks.

You were back to the room where you started. As you waited at the bar, you hear someone calling for Hana’s name. You look around and see Eunwoo and Yugyeom.

Hana: Guyyyss!

They hugged both of you. It was the first time you saw them acting normal in public, not having flashes in their faces. Then there he was, Jungkook came behind them and greeted with a shy “hi”.

You and Hana just nodded. You think she hates him more than you. He has a stupid grin on his face and you can feel his eyes scanning your body. Something he will never get to touch again.

Eunwoo: What are you two doing here?

Hana: Well, we are working for Hybe this year, helping with Seventeen’s world tour. And sometimes we’re getting a little spoiled.

Eunwoo: Does that mean Mingyu is here?

Hana: Yeah, somewhere.

Yugyeom: How come we didn’t know?

You shrug and lift your shoulders. Are they not that close anymore?

Jungkook: So the whole gang is here except Jaehyun who’s on tour also.

Eunwoo: We should get some dinner and drink after this, like old times.

Y/N: I don’t know, Woo, not sure it will be like it used to.

Eunwoo: Jungkook, this is your fault. Y/N, you can ignore him. Plus, if he upsets you he’s going to have to deal with me.

You feel an arm coming gently around your waist and pulling you into him.

Mingyu: Who’s going to upset my bestie?

You look up at him with big eyes, wondering why he’s acting like this.

Eunwoo: Gyu! Come on, give me a hug. I feel like I haven’t seen you in ages. You’re a big shot now.

He takes his arm away and hugs his friends, including Jungkook.

Then comes Jun from behind and puts his arms on both your and Hana’s shoulders, standing between you two.

Jun: Hey guys, what a surprise seeing you here. And you found our girls.

Jungkook scoffs and rolls his eyes.

Eunwoo: I was just telling our girls that we should go out to eat and drink after this, like old times. Are you in, Gyu? And Jun, you’re invited too.

Mingyu: I would go, but we already have a thing planned with the members and some of the managers and staff. But you’re invited to come with us.

He looks at you for a bit, almost like asking with his eyes if it’s ok and you nod.

The three guys accept the invite and you already try to think of excuses of how to skip this late dinner.

Mingyu: Let’s take some photos for the gram, shall we?

Then he leans into your ear to tell you something.

Mingyu: Look over my right shoulder. You see Soonyoung there in the crowd?

You look as he says and you see him.

Mingyu: Take Hana and go to him. I know you want to escape JK right now.

Y/N: Thanks, Gyu.

You take Hana’s hand and excuse yourself, walking straight to Soonyoung. You felt like you could not breath unless you head him or touch him.

He immediately saw you coming toward him and he felt his heart race. His friends were talking to him but he couldn’t hear or see them anymore. There was just you. He could only see you.

Hana: Yaaa, Hoshi! Where were you?

She went for a hug. She was clearly tipsy. His eyes were on you all this time and she was trying to talk to him.

Hana: Oh, yeah. Right.

He could see you were not feeling your best, you had puppy eyes and pouty lips.

He takes your hand to rub gentle circles on the back of your palm.

Soonyoung: What’s wrong?

Y/N: Nothing, just saw someone I’d prefer not to.

Soonyoung: Oh. What can I do?

You pouted some more and looked down at your connected hands.

Y/N: Um. Hold my hand for a bit and I’ll be better?

Hearing this, his eyes turned into half moons and he smiled widely.

Soonyoung: Come on, I’ll introduce you to some superstars.

Y/N: Oh my

Soonyoung: Guys, this is my very good friend Y/N and this is Hana

Taemin: We finally meet you, Y/N friend of Hoshi. I’m Taemin

Key: Hello, I’m Key

Y/N: Nice to meet you, I feel honoured

Hana: Hello! So I don’t get the title friend, eh, Hosh?

Soonyoung: You are my friend also.

Leaning into you, he asks if you’re better and you nod, smiling at him. His hand still holding yours tight.

The room cleared a little, since some of the guests went outside to watch the fireworks. Behind you, the ’97 group and Jun were still talking. Jungkook had a clear view at you now and what he saw shocked him.

Why the fuck is she holding hands with Hoshi? He became enraged and drank his whisky glass as a shot. He needed another. Now he really needed to know what the hell was going on. He knew you and Mingyu were not together anymore. But he was not expecting you having another relationship.

He was enraged because he tried so hard to break you and Mingyu, and after the success, now he needs to do more work. He can’t stand and watch you with another man that’s not him. Not again.

Soonyoung: Want to watch the fireworks?

Y/N: I love fireworks

He doesn’t let go to your hand, leading you outside and calling his friends and Hana to join.

Y/N: Is this ok? Someone might see and take pictures.

Soonyoung: It’s fine, trust me.

Even though earlier you were feeling sick to your stomach because of Jungkook’s presence, this moment was making you feel happy and complete. You had Soonyoung next to you, his hand burning hot in yours.

He looks at you and he sees tears in your eyes.

Soonyoung: What’s wrong?

Y/N: I’m just being emotional. I guess a lot happened lately.

Soonyoung: I get that. I’m here (and he squeezes your hand tighter). It will feel better after dinner. Just a little longer, ok? You’re riding with me in my car to the restaurant.

One hour later you’re in the car with Soonyoung, Jeonghan and Seungkwan.

Seungkwan: Why are you holding hands? What’s wrong with you two?

Soonyoung: My friends needs emotional support so I’m giving it to her.

Seungkwan: Ugh, you two make me sick.

Jeonghan: Why is Mingyu saying in the group chat that the ’97 gang will join for dinner?

Soonyoung turns his face to you in shock.

Y/N: Oh, yeah. It was a weird situation and Mingyu had to invite them.

Jeonghan: But won’t Jungkook will be there?

Y/N: Yeah…(you move your eyes into your lap where you are fiddling with the rings on your fingers)

Soonyoung: Don’t worry, you’ll sit next to me and far from him and we won’t leave you alone. Right, guys?

Both Jeonghan and Seungkwan nod and it’s like a promise.

Jeonghan: I can’t promise I will be able to hold on too much, I am already fucking tired. I could sleep right here right now. But I’ll do my best.

Y/N: Thanks, guys. You’re the best!

The restaurant was empty, no other customers. It was very late too. But it filled with all of you once you all sat at the tables. Everyone ordered drinks and food and the drinking started.

You say between Hoshi and Seungkwan that were taking their mission very seriously. They took care of you all night, asking you what you needed, fixing your food, feeding you. That was a bit much, but funny still.

Seungcheol: What’s going on there? You two look like a couple, feeding their baby.

Seungkwan: We’re just spoiling our girl. She’s been working so hard.

Hana: Hey, what about me? I’ve been working hard too. Who’s feeding me?

And 4 guys offered her food to shove into her mouth. Joshua took a green salad leaf and really managed to put it into her mouth aggressively. Mingyu took a piece of steak and shoved it there too. Dokyeom wanted to go crazy and pushed a spoon with soup close to her, but it ended up on her plate. Then there was Jeonghan that took a piece of cake.

Of course he pushed it in her mouth along with the salad and steak.

Hana was stunned, trying to talk and complain, and at the same time she burst out laughing. So all the food went out her mouth. Luckily, she put a tissue in front of it before she made a mess.

Everyone laughed and you took advantage of the moment to go to the restroom.

Y/N: I’ll be right back.

Soonyoung: I’ll go with you.

Y/N: Soonie, noo. You wanna hold my hand while I pee?

Soonyoung: If you wanted me to, yeah.

You slap his chest gently and get up.

Soonyoung: Ouch, not my tiddies! (he brings his hand to his slapped tiddy to massage the pain away)

Nobody noticed that after 3 minutes, Jungkook got up from his chair and walked to the restroom too.

He was waiting for you to come out, outside the bathroom doors.

Y/N: No, just no. don’t wanna talk to you.

Jungkook: Please! I’ll behave, I promise. I’m not a monster.

Y/N: Could have fooled me after all the shit you did.

Jungkook: I’m so sorry about everything. I wish to explain myself. I know I have no excuse and I don’t deserve forgiveness. I just want to explain why I did what I did.

Y/N: Go ahead, explain.

Jungkook: I was very stupid. Young and dumb you could say. I didn’t tell you about the army because the company found out about our relationship and they were very strict about it and told me to end it. And the reason they wanted me to end it was because some stalker of mine had photos and videos with us, even from my apartment and your apartment. And she threatened that she will expose me. You have to understand that my career would have been over.

Y/N: You could of told me.

Jungkook: No, because I needed a reason for the breakup. And the company came up with the idea that I could go to the military, just like that, without a word. And it worked, didn’t it?

Y/N: And after you were a complete asshole.

Jungkook: I was mad angry when I found out about you and Mingyu. I still loved you.

Y/N: You could still text me after you went to the military and explain.

Jungkook: I just didn’t feel it was the right thing to do. I needed to get away from you completely. I also tried to forget you but I couldn’t.

Y/N: And then you started to get your tail between me and Gyu.

Jungkook: I’m sorry about that too.

Y/N: Were you the one who attacked me in front of my building that night?

Jungkook: I would never do that. Could never hurt you physically.

Y/N: And you think emotional pain is ok? You think it was easy for me when you left me? You pushed me and Gyu together. He was there for me when you weren’t. you chose to leave and he stayed. He’s still there for me after everything.

Jungkook: I need to confess something. I need to get this off my chest.

Y/N: What?

Jungkook: Mingyu never cheated on you. I planed that night. I spiked his drink, and the girl n the photos was a friend. I’m really sorry.

Y/N: What? What? Are you telling me that all those miserable weeks and months, all those nights when I could not sleep, those days that I could not eat and was close to collapsing at work because of it… all of that for nothing? Just because you were jealous?

Jungkook: I have no excuse.

Y/N: No, you fucking don’t. You took away my happiness twice. And you took away Mingyu’s happiness too. We were so good together. I even thought he was the one. I fucking hate you, Jungkook!

Tears run down your cheeks, reminiscing all that pain you felt when you thought Mingyu broke your trust. And all this time since then, that you spent punishing yourself because you thought all men are the same and all will cheat. You punished yourself to be alone.

Y/N: I can’t believe how sinister you can be.

Jungkook: I’m sorry, I am really trying to be better.

You look at him and you can see he’s tearing up too. His eyes look honest and you never seen him in this state, almost broken.

Jungkook: You have to believe me. I am really trying. It’s hard. I’m even seeing a therapist to help me. Please, believe me. I am trying to keep the bad thoughts away. Even tonight when I saw you holding Hoshi’s hand I went mad. I don’t know, I thought I was over you. I guess I’m just a sick person.

He gets on his knees, his face filled with tears that roll down his chin, dropping onto his shirt.

Jungkook: Please, forgive me! Please Y/N!!

You take his hands into yours. He’s trembling like crazy and you need to calm him down. You can’t stand him, but you can’t leave him like this.

So you pull him up and into your arms, hugging him tight.

Y/N: It’s ok, it’s going to be ok.

Jungkook: It’s not ok, I did horrible things.

Y/N: Let’s relax for now, ok? We will talk another time when we’re both feeling better. But now we are here and the food will be ready. Also, we don’t want anyone knowing we bawled out eyes out, do we?

Jungkook: No, we don’t

Y/N: Come on, let’s go into the restroom and make ourselves looks presentable.

Jungkook: I feel like you should kick me in the balls or something, because you’re too nice to me.

Y/N: Do you want me to kick you in the balls?

Jungkook: N..no?

Y/N: Then don’t put nice thoughts like that in my head.

Hoshi noticed you were gone for quite some time and Jungkook was not in his seat. He got up, going to look for you. Going into the restroom, he found you and Jungkook fixing your makeup in the mirror.

Soonyoung: What the hell is going on here?

Y/N: Soonieeee! Come here and help me!

He looks at you and he can see you’re eyes are red and a little swollen.

Soonyoung: Y/N, did you cry?

Y/N: This one cried harder.

Jungkook: I’m going back to the table. Thanks, Y/N.(he stops in his track and gives a nod, then leaves)

Soonyoung: What the fuck! What was that about?

Y/N: We talked

Soonyoung: About?

Y/N: About how he was a butthole.

Soonyoung: Are you ok though?

Y/N: I am now.

Then you pinch his cheeks and place a soft single kiss on his lips.

Y/N: Let’s go, tiger. I’m starving and I need a drink.

Soonyoung: You’re not actually going to pretend you didn’t just kiss me?

But you did just that. You got back into the room bickering like always.

Seungkwan: That’s more like it. I was starting to miss this bickering. Y/N, when are you going to kick him in the balls next? That was really fun to watch

Y/N: Kwaaan! Why would I kick Soonie like that?

Seungkwan: Soonie? I think I’m going to puke.(he makes a dramatic scene where he pretends like he’s puking and fainting)

Food came and Hoshi continued to feed you. It made him feel good.

Y/N: I can do it myself, you know.

Soonyoung: Shut up and eat, I’m an expert with food and eating.

As he feeds you, your hand goes to sit on his thigh. You didn’t even notice, but he did. Oh, did he. You were even squeezing it whenever he was giving you too much food that you could not fit into your mouth.

Y/N: Soonie, slow down. Can’t eat this fast.

Soonyoung: Sorry, but your hand it kind of distracts me from thinking straight.

You look down at your hands. One is on your thigh and the other on his. You pull it away immediately, apologising.

He feels like he can finally let out a breath that he was holding for decades. He thanks himself for wearing oversized clothes tonight. You just have this effect on him and he’s just a weak man.

You’re both blushing. You’re acting like you haven’t been teasing and bullying each other since you met. But that was your thing. When it was banter, you two were at each other’s throat, daring and shit. But when it was serious, you were both a shy mess.

Jeonghan and Minghao were the first ones to leave. Hana asked them to take her with them. He told you she needed to go meet Hyunwoo the dancer.

02:19

Hana: Wife, I’m going to leave with Jeonghan. Hynwoo is waiting for me. Can you sleep in Jun’s room tonight? Hyunwoo’s roommate is sleeping already in their shared room.

02:20

Y/N: Ok, have fun and use protection my silly slut.

You scoff and sight and Soonyoung asks what happened.

Y/N: I need to ask Jun to sleep in his room tonight. Hana is having some action in our room.

Soonyoung: Sleep in my room!

Y/N: Oh! Really?

Soonyoung: Yeah. My bed is huge and I’m a good boy.

You look at him and you can tell he’s pretty drunk. There are two scenarios that go trough your head. One-he’s going to fall asleep as soon as his head hits the pillow and he won’t bother you. Two-he’s going to be clingy and needy and he’s going to cuddle the shit out of you.

You don’t plan on doing anything else, though your whole body wants to. But no. Even if you’d decide that you want to accept him romantically, this would not be the right way to start.

You’d want to try a different path and make sure this one would last. He is indeed very different from all the guys you met in your life. Maybe that’s one of the reasons you’re so drawn to him.

So you accept his offer. You have nothing to lose. Maybe just your sanity for being this close to the guy you’re in love with. Maybe you’re sleep, knowing he’s right there, arm reach, and you’re all sweaty and wet and needy.

But no. You will behave and you know he will too.

Y/N: Ok, then I’ll sleep in your room.

And his face lights up at that and he pats your head, calling you a good girl.

I mean, he could keep these remarks to himself. It’s enough that I’m having such a hard time already. My sex life it’s inexistent and he’s so…

Soonyoung: Why are you looking at me funny?

Y/N: Oh, am I? Sorry, no reason. You’re just cute when you’re drunk.

You continue eating and hiding the alcohol from Hoshi. He already had 2 glasses of whatever, you don’t even know what was in there. You catch his glass that he just filled earlier and you take it to your mouth to taste it.

You decide he won’t drink that, Afterall, you are the one who’s going to be dealing with him later. You don’t want to break you back from dragging him all the way to the bed.

He pouts a little whenever you take his glass, and doesn’t even realises when you switch it with water. You’re not much sober than he is, but you’re more responsible.

Now it’s your turn to feed him and you don’t mind. Seungkwan shoots you dramatic looks. He likes to act like cute things make him sick but everyone knows better.

You hear Mingyu, Eunwoo and Jungkook argue about who’s the most popular idol among them. You’re glad to see they are still close. Noticing Jun on the other side of the table you want to go sit next to him and spend some quality time with your bestie.

When you get up, you tell Seungkwan and Joshua to keep their eyes on Hoshi and not let him drink alcohol anymore. A grip on your wrist keeps you from walking away.

Soonyoung: Where are you going? Why are you leaving me alone?

Y/N: You’re not alone though, and I’m going to sit next to Jun for a while.

He sights and puts some food into his mouth, nodding. As you sit next to your bestie, you have Soonyoung right in front of you and you can’t not notice how often he looks at you.

He’s being quite flirty, you think? Sending flying kisses, then he catches them himself. But there is someone else watching you. Jungkook. You caught him a few times while you were having a conversation with Jun.

He looks lost, you might say. It’s impossible he still has feelings for you, right? It’s been such a long time and he’s sure met plenty of interesting girls.

You even heard a rumour about him having a girlfriend not long back. And also, you didn’t think of yourself like such a great catch. Why would someone like him would not be able to get over a nobody like you?

It’s not that you are not confident, but you like to keep it real. There are others far more beautiful, talented, richer and more suitable for him. Maybe you’ll have a nice grown up conversation with him sometime and unravel this mystery.

You’ll need to talk to Mingyu also and apologise for what happened and all the hurtful words you said to him in the past.

But until then, you needed to get Soonyoung out of there and into bed, because the poor guy ‘s face was red and puffy and he could barely keep his eyes open.

So you ask Jun if he will go to the hotel with you in the same car. Hearing that you want to leave, Minghao says he wants to join you too. Good, more help with carrying Hoshi.

You announce that you’re going to leave. Jun helps Hoshi to steady himself. He can walk straight, but he could bump into something because of his blurred vision right now.

Mingyu comes outside with you, asking if everything’s ok and you tell him you’re fine and that you need to talk to him soon when he gets some free time. He nods, gives you a warm hug and goes back inside.

Mingyu: Someone needs to drink Dino under the table.

In the car, Hoshi puts his head in Minghao’s lap, falling asleep. 20 minutes later you find yourself knocking at your room, waiting for Hana to bring your sleepover backpack. That’s your drill whenever one of you needs the room for herself.

Then off you go to Hoshi’s room. You find him collapsed onto the bed, clothes on, shoes on.

You start to take his shoes off and he starts to kick his feet ap and down.

Soonyoung: Hihihih it tickles.

Y/N: I know, but we need to get you into bed, ok?

Soonyoung: Ok, mom

Y/N: I’ll also take your shirt and pants off and put your pj’s on.

He just keeps on giggling and kicking his feet. He’s so cute. You’re glad his’s this type of drunk.

You look for his sleeping clothes and you find a tshirt and some shorts. These will do.

Then the hard part begins. You get him to sit on the edge of the bed and pull on his shirt over his head. Then you pull the tshirt on.

When it’s time for the pants he gets shy.

Soonyoung: I’ll do it, you can’t see me naked.

Y/N: But you have underwear on. Right?

Soonyoung: So what. You’re not taking my pants off

Y/N: I thought you wanted me to do that

Soonyoung: Y/N, this is not the time to be thirsty

Y/N: If I was acting thirsty I would be in your lap right now. Do you see me there?

He looks at his lap, brings his hands in front and looks at them. Then all of the sudden you’re in his lap.

Y/N: What are you doing?

Soonyoung: Now you’re thirsty.

Y/N: Am not!

You try to get up but he keeps you there with a strong grip around your waist, holding you tight.

Soonyoung: Don’t go!

Y/N: I’m not going, I’m just trying to change you into sleep clothes then we can go to bed

Soonyoung: Can you cuddle me?

Y/N: I don’t know if we should, Soonie

Soonyoung: I should have known to ask Jun to sleep here tonight. He would cuddle me

He buries his face into your chest. More exactly between your breasts and you wonder if he’s realizing what he’s doing.

Y/N: Hoshingi, my tits are in your face. Stop being so thirsty

Soonyoung: So warm, could sleep like this.

Then you push him on his back and get off him. You grab his belt to take his pants off.

Soonyoung: Whoah, take it slow, I’m sensitive.

When his pants are on the floor you pull his short on, and he huffs disappointed.

Soonyoung: I thought you wanted to take advantage of me.

Y/N: Shut up and sleep. Tomorrow you’re having rehearsals for 10 straight hours.

You go into the bathroom to get ready for bed and when you return, he’s already sleeping. You exhale loudly and find a spot on the other side of the bed.

Not even 5 minutes passed that you feel movement and an arm coming over your waist, pulling you into his warm body. His leg going right over yours. You’re caged in.

This feels nice, but how are you going to be able to sleep now? You feel his breath on the back of your neck. Makes you feel butterflies. You smile and you feel like crying.

You remember all those times you felt alone at night, wanting someone to just hold you. It feels nice even to just hear his gentle snores. Sometimes his fingers would twitch in his sleep and you so wanted to hold his hand right now.

So you put your hand over his and the twitching stopped. It was like you calmed him down. At some point, you don’t really know when, you also fall asleep.

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minhosimthings · 8 months ago

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Enhypen's eyes are pretty like....

Warnings: fluff and a shit ton of poetry, mention of food and alcohol

A/N: just wanted to rant a bit about how pretty Enha's eyes are

Lee Heeseung

Heeseung's eyes are filled with the rain which gets stuck on your window sill, the raindrops that you always made race each other on the car windows as a child. It is the lightining which you would shield yourself from, under heaps of blankets and soft music playing from a recorder. His eyes are made from the grey clouds, the heavy atmosphere threatening to breakdown, bringing with it, heavy drops of beautiful rain. Heeseung is a rainy night, with hot cups of tea, snacks, cats cuddled up against you, and someone's voice singing ambrosia into your ear.

Park 'Jay' Jongsoeng

Jay's eyes are made up of black licorice, and clear night skies. Those night skies when all the stars tell their individual stories so beautifully. Andromeda over there with her flowing hair, Perseus over here with Pegasus carrying him so mightily. Jay's eyes have that black licorice that people have mixed emotions over, the smooth shiny strips of candy, that can make or break a smile out. Those eyes have that feeling of nostalgia, of dancing yourself drunk out on a terrace, of swaying to music at a bar, of making drinks at home and fawning over them. Jay is a panorama of old memories.

Sim 'Jake' Jaeyun

Jake's eyes are almost full, with the amount of scenes of dawn in them. His eyes are pretty like that orangish-yellow of the rising sun, like the birds which sing their song early in the morning to wake us up with a calm feeling of "everything is going to be fine". Jake's eyes speak comfort. They speak those nights where all you want to do is curl up with your lover and sleep, knowing that the universe loves you. They speak those nights where you trace your scars, remembering how your lover would kiss them goodnight, in order to ease that painful memory. Jake is scented pillows, and comfort, and a warm cocoon of welcome hugs.

Park Sunghoon

Sunghoon's eyes remind everyone of that first snow. The first snow when mistletoe hung above your head and you only wished for the galaxies to send you someone to press your lips to. They are those memories of ice skating with someone holding carefully onto you as you begged them not to let go, lest you fall to the ground. His eyes hold that passion of the careful love, the lovers who are too afraid of love itself. His eyes scream that emotion of knowing love not as it is, but as it could be. Sunghoon is a festival of love which is as pretty as the icy moon.

A/N: Mona here! I hope you enjoyed this rant of mine and i hope you know that I'm falling in love with your eyes with every passing moment, dear reader.

#enha #enhypen #enhypen fluff #enha fluff #lee Heeseung fluff #park jay fluff #park jongseong fluff #sim jaeyun fluff #sim jake fluff #park Sunghoon fluff #enhypen smut #enha hard thoughts #enha hard hours #enha poetry #enha hyung line

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saltciphblr · 1 year ago

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So, I started writing the lovebug AU.

Have the fluff from before everything goes horribly wrong!

Together you and Sun directed the kids to get settled in with their blankets and stuffies around the TV to settle in for movie night, and you wandered off to the security desk to grab your own chair so you could sit comfortably as well. Sun followed, making sure the kids were accounted for first, and then approached you. In preparation for the lights turning off, he pressed his faceplate to the top of your head in an affectionate gesture that made your cheeks burn. It was his best attempt at a kiss, and no matter how many times he did it, you got butterflies every time.

You reached up to his faceplate, and despite his sheepish giggles and hesitance, he let you pull him down to press a kiss to his forehead.

“Goodnight, Sun. I’ll see you tomorrow.”

“Goodnight, Sunflower.”

Your heart swelled as you let him go, not exactly turning your back as the lights went out, but allowing him to walk away and have his moment of privacy to transform. It didn’t hurt them anymore, which was such a relief. You’d spent months hearing them fight each other, so to know that they could let eachother take and relinquish control… It was a comforting change of pace.

The movie was already starting, and the kids knew the lights were going out, so no reassurance was needed as they were already plenty distracted. It gave you the chance to start dragging your own chair over, before a pair of large hands slid around your waist and stopped you.

The smooth silicon of Moon’s chassis pressed against your back as he leaned down to rest his faceplate over your shoulder, the minky fabric of his hat brushing the side of your face.

“Hello Starling…”

You sighed and grinned, bonking your head against the side of his.

“Good morning, Moon. Did you sleep well?”

“Mmmaybe.” Just as quickly as he had snuck up behind you, he disappeared and instead reached ahead of you and grabbed your chair from out of your hands and carried it over to the movie night gathering. You started to protest but knew it was pointless, instead rolling your eyes and accepting his help.

#lovebug au #salt writes #sun and moon x reader #sun and moon x y/n

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florida3exclamationpoints · 9 months ago

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Since Taylor seems to be confused about what Mary's Song (Oh My My My) is, I put together a comprehensive list of potential mashups or pairings she could use during surprise song o'clock. Hope this helps 🫶

She said, (dear reader) I was 7 and you were 9. I hit my peak at 7. The tricky thing is yesterday we were just children. I looked at you like the stars that shine in the sky. Love you to the moon and to Saturn. The stars in your eyes shined brighter in Tupelo. I've never seen nobody shine the way you do. He's passing by, rare as the glimmer of a comet in the sky. The pretty lights. One night a few moons ago, I saw specks of what could have been lights but it might just have been you. I know looks can be deceiving, but I know I saw a light in you. And our daddies used to joke about the two of us growing up and falling in love. Up on the roof with a schoolgirl crush. And our mamas smiled and rolled their eyes. When you're on the phone and you talk real slow 'cause it's late and your mama don't know. And said "oh my, my, my." (My, my, my, my.)

Take me back to the house in the backyard tree. Please picture me in the trees. In backyards, winning battles with our wooden swords. Friday night beneath the stars in a field behind your yard. Said you'd beat me up, you were bigger than me, you never did. Hey Dorothea do you ever stop and think about me? Down in the park, honey, making a lark of the misery. You would break your back to make me break a smile. We were like the mall before the internet, it was the one place to be, the mischief, the gift wrapped suburban dreams. Take me back when our world was one block wide. We had this big, wide city all to ourselves. When I'm feeling alone, you remind me of home. I didn't choose this town; there's just one who could make me stay all my days. I dared you to kiss me and ran when you tried. Daring you to leave me just so I can try and scare you. I've been loving you for quite some time; I just like hanging out with you all the time. Just two kids, you and I. You throw your head back laughing like a little kid. Like a child when our eyes meet. At 14 there's just so much you can't do. When you're 15 and somebody tells you they love you, you're gonna believe them.

(Next chapter) I was 16 when suddenly I wasn't that little girl you used to see. 16 and wild. A teenage couple in the driveway, holding hands on the way to a dance. I'm crazier for you than I was at 16. Teal was the color of your shirt when you were 16 at the yogurt shop you used to work at to make a little money. The kind of radiance you only have at 17. But your eyes still shined like pretty lights. Your eyes look like coming home. Starry eyes sparking up my darkest night. And our daddies used to joke about the two of us. Any snide remarks from my father about your tattoos will be ignored, 'cause my heart is yours. They never believed we'd really fall in love. Seems like there's always someone who disapproves. Sun sinks down, no curfew, twenty questions, we tell the truth. You can hear it in the silence, you can feel it on the way home, you can see it with the lights out, you are in love, true love. Not trying to fall in love, but we did like children running. And our mamas smiled and rolled their eyes. And your mama's waiting up, and you're thinking he's the one. And said "oh my, my, my." "Oh my, love is a lie," shit my friends say to get me by.

Take me back to the creek beds we turned up, 2am riding in your truck. 2am, in your car. Just a boy in a Chevy truck that had a tendency of getting stuck on back roads at night. And all I need is you next to me. Everything I need is right here by my side. I'll be summer sun for you forever. Take me back to the time we had our very first fight, the slamming of doors instead of kissing goodnight, you stayed outside till the morning light. I remember that fight, 2:30am as everything was slipping right out of our hands, I ran out crying and you followed me out into the street; you took me by surprise, you said "I'll never leave you alone." This love is worth the fight. You fight, then you talk. When we had that fight out in the rain, you ran after me and called my name, I never wanna see you walk away. Oh my, my, my. My heart, my hips, my body, my love.

A few years had gone and come around. Our coming of age has come and gone. We were sitting at our favorite spot in town. I love my hometown. This place is the same as it ever was. And you looked at me, got down on one knee. And all at once, you're all I want, I'll never let you go. I like shiny things, but I'd marry you with paper rings. I wanna teach you how forever feels.

Take me back to the time when we walked down the aisle. Church bells ring, carry me home, rice on the ground, looks like snow. I want you for worse or for better. There you'll stand, next to me, all at once, the rest is history. Our whole town came and our mamas cried. I'll be there if you're the toast of the town, babe. I had the fantasy that maybe our mismatched star signs would surprise the whole school when I ended up back at our class reunion walking in with you. You said "I do" and I did too. I vowed I will always be yours. I'm so in love that I might stop breathing. You and me forevermore. Take me home where we met so many years before. I find myself running home to your sweet nothings. Barefoot in the kitchen, sacred new beginnings that became my religion. Take me to the lakes where all the poets went to die. It's been 2190 days of our love blackout. Floors of a cabin creaking under my step. Just being in your arms takes me back to that little farm. He feels like home. I want to watch wisteria grow right over my bare feet, 'cause I haven't moved in years. I heard your key turn in the door down the hallway. We'll rock our babies on that very front porch. Your little hand's wrapped around my finger and it's so quiet in the world tonight, your little eyelids flutter 'cause you're dreaming so I tuck you in, turn on your favorite night light. Give you my wild, give you a child. We could get married, have ten kids and teach them how to dream. After all this time, you and I. Time, mystical time. I've been sleeping so long in a 20 year dark night, now I see daylight.

I'll be 87, you'll be 89. Long story short, I survived. Time breaks down your mind and body, don't you let it touch your soul; I'm gonna love you when our hair is turning gray. All my days, I'll know your face. I'll still look at you like the stars that shine in the sky. When Emma falls in love, it's all on her face, hangs in the air like stars from outer space. Oh my, my, my, my.

#i did it i remade it 😭#actually. its longer this time skdhskfbjs #now after that entird debacle. you better appreciate this 🤺#mary's song #taylor swift #taylor swift debut #marys song #surprise songs #the eras tour

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gfguren · 2 years ago

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fae!shikamaru x (fem) reader | an ENTIRELY self indulgent fic, fantasy!au, shameless smut | cw: mentions of hypothermia, degradation, manipulation?, shikamaru is an ass

-fae!shikamaru takes a liking to you-

part 1 | part 2

The fireflies danced through the trees and it would have been beautiful, had you been a fool. And maybe still, if the chill of the night hadn't crawled up your spine to wrap around your throat, you'd not have fallen victim to the illusions of the forest. You knew better than to follow the little light twirling around your being and past the old wood, so innocent - and so very very deadly.

The sun disappears and the forest nymph looks to the sky, eyes of seafoam and emerald lingering on the moon peeking over the quickly fading sunset. "You've stayed too long." When he turns his gaze on you once more, he wears a worried expression, one of the violets in his hair falling softly to ground. "I need not remind you to avoid the wisps, do I?"

You smile though you feel your heart in your throat. "Follow the violets til the very last tree. Do not stray, and close my eyes if I must. And never, ever, follow the light." You eye the pretty forest guardian with his wily red hair, you've always wondered how not a single strand looked out of place, messy as it is. "Right?"

You repeat his mantra, you've heard it a hundred times. With a light nod, he tucks the fallen flower behind your ear. "Do not forget it. I would surely miss your company."

"Don't worry, Gaara. I have too many stories to tell to disappear now."

"The forest cares not for your stories, be cautious." As stoic as ever, one day you'll get him to laugh - he'll have the prettiest smile, you muse, perhaps the wildflowers will come to life, braving the biting November breeze to catch a glimpse of his beauty. "Now go, before the fae begin to wander."

So you do, feet mapping every last violet until the final beam of light kisses your skin, wishing you a warm goodnight and disappearing behind the horizon. The moon is high overhead before you feel the first trickle of dread.

You should be home by now, tucked beneath that plush yellow quilt, hand sewn by your doting mother. Is she worried about you right now, sitting by the fireplace with your little sister in her arms, waiting for her oldest to return? You wonder when, if you'll even return, what with the forest's end seemingly getting further and further away.

The thought chills you to the bone.

And when the lights come to life, appearing before you like reflections of the stars in the sky, your knees go weak. Gaara's words echo in your mind and you're quick to shut your eyes, wringing your fingers together as if that'll quell your shaking palms. "Just follow the violets." Your breath departs in a silver mist.

When had it grown so cold?

Your eyes open once more and you're startled at the stark nothingness before you. The violet path you'd trekked a hundred times is - gone.

How could it be gone just like that? You'd followed the blooming petals all the way to the forest nymphs' spring just this morning.

You take a step backwards, jumping at the crunch echoing through the forest. You lift the heel of your boot to find the remnants of a once purple flower, turned brown and crisp. They're wilted - dead.

It's then that you realize the chatter of the forest has ceased; the trees have gone still, the owls no longer cry, every last woodland creatures has stopped skittering to and from, and Gaara's flowers have wilted right under your feet. As if life itself has fled from the forest.

Perhaps that’s why you’re so desperate, when you know better than to follow that twinkling light. But the cold suffocates you in its icy hold, numbing your fingers and forcing you forward despite your hesitation.

How can something so pretty be so dangerous anyway? It has to be better than freezing to death.

Right?

The light flickers past the trees and you try your best to follow, careful not to trip on the overgrowth of roots. It speeds up and you begin to wonder if it's guiding you, or running from the deathly cold forest behind you. You don't know which is worse.

Suddenly it disappears like candlelight, and you can almost swear you hear a breath of laughter on the breeze that extinguishes it. You choke on the panic rising in your throat - now what?

Ahead of you is a thick mass of forest, trees taller than you thought they could grow, and it's then that you feel the chill wrap around you in a threatening embrace, daring you to linger a moment longer. One foot forward, you venture closer, trekking carefully over the massive roots and dead leaves. Second thoughts skirt the edge of your conscious but the cold creeps up your spine and you press further.

"I wouldn't take another step if I were you." A voice muses from behind you and you jump, whipping around to face the mysterious stranger. He's a shadow in the distance, arms crossed and head down as he leans against a tree. "That is, if you're goal wasn't to be eaten by the forest."

You think you hear him chuckle and the tears prick your eyes. "Do you-" your mouth suddenly grows dry. "Do you know the way out?"

He shrugs, and you swear you see the hint of a smirk twisting in the darkness. "Maybe." Your eyes light up until he finishes with a nonchalant, "or maybe not."

You desperately make your way to him, caution and reserve be damned. "Please tell me. I need to get home, I-"

"What's in it for me?" Your eyes meet his and it's only then that you see the strange hue swirling in the abyss he calls irises and the shadow of two wings cast over the trees behind him. Your blood runs cold.

A faerie.

Your gaze falls to the ground, the toe of your boot an inch away from the circle of mushrooms surrounding him. "You- you're-"

"I- I'm-" He mocks, head tilting to the side as he pushes off the tree and draws near, though he doesn't cross the threshold. It's not until you turn on your heel, intent on running as far away as your feet can take you that he speaks once more. "So you've figured the way out all on your own? Are you confident the forest won't swallow you whole?"

"I'm less confident that you won't," you breath, frozen fingers balled at your sides.

His laughs in a bemused sort of way that's both beautiful and frightening and the duality sends your heart skittering away like a frightened rabbit. "Maybe I was wrong. You do have a brain in that pretty head of yours." He rustles behind you and you dare to peek over your shoulder, catching a glimpse of him leaning forward, toeing at the barrier between your bodies. "So why don't you use it and realize you don't have a chance in this forest. Not on your own."

He crosses his arms, continuing. "And who knows? It could be fun. Don't you like a bit of a gamble?"

"Not when it's with my life, thank you very much."

"How boring." He shrugs, plopping down on the grass with his arms crossed. "I'll enjoy the show then. I wonder, will you freeze to death or will the forest eat you up? My bet is on the latter."

You should walk away, take your chances with the forest, and you know it. But you've lost the feeling in your toes, and you're sure your lips are turning blue. "What is it you want from me?"

"Oh, not much." He rises once more, hands clasped behind his back and a wicked smile on his face. "Why don't we start with your name?"

You outright laugh. "I'd rather be eaten by the trees."

"It was worth a shot," he hums. "I didn't think it would be easy, not with that nosy forest nymph telling you all our secrets."

"How did you-"

"Do you not hear the forest whispering?" he muses, laughing at the confusion sweeping your face. "Oh right, of course not. You're only human after all."

His contempt is biting but doesn't seem genuine, strangely enough.

He crosses the threshold like a breath of cold air whipping past your face, and circles your shivering form. You think you feel his fingers dance past your shoulder, before his lips are at your ear. "Why don't you come play with me for a little while? I hear you tell magnificent stories."

You force down the fear crawling up your throat and instead choke out a mocking and embittered, "What's in it for me?"

You feel his smirk against your cheek, clearly entertained by your gall. He takes a step back, once more encircled in mushrooms and when you turn to face him, his hand is extended, tantalizingly. "I know of someplace warm."

Shikamaru - that's the name he gave you, though you didn't think for a second it was truly his; you knew such things held power over the fae, and he certainly didn’t seem foolish enough to simply offer it to a stranger. But he also wasn't as scary as you'd thought - if anything he was hospitable, a good listener, perhaps a bit obstinate at times but amicable nonetheless. And handsome, annoyingly so, with a sharp jawline and a pretty smile to boot.

He was true to his word too - took you to a place warm and soft and entirely fantastical, with oddly plush sheets and overgrown flora that glowed with beautiful and ominous light. He served you the ripest fruit and the finest wine and only asked for your stories in return.

It seemed as if you’d spent an eternity together, though you’re not sure how much time had truly passed; the world is a perpetual state of twilight and sometimes your mind is clouded in a hazy sort of way that makes it hard to discern or remember anything at all really. It could have been days, months, years even.

So you make sure to cling to two things in this strange, hazy world.

Firstly, the memory of your mother who you're sure is waiting, waiting still - and that you miss her fiercely. Secondly, the knowledge that Shikamaru is dangerous. No matter how badly you want to believe that his intentions hold no deceit or ill will, he is a faerie after all, and by nature you can't take all his words for truths, or fall perilously into him - for him. As tempting as it is.

It's especially tempting in this very moment, with the stars twinkling so brightly against the dusty pink sky and the faerie sitting beside you, reciting the story of each constellation with such deep and profound knowledge. You hang onto each word that falls, falls, falls from his lips and you fall, too. Faster than you can catch yourself.

Sharp eyes meet yours, drawing you in like an abyss and beckoning you to abandon all your reservations and just jump. A knowing grin spreads across his face and he leans in until his hot breath is fanning past your lips. "Snap out of it, gullible human, before I take it as an invitation."

The haze lifts and you shrink back in embarrassment. He only chuckles, turning away to lift the intricately carved pipe from his lap and breathe in deep. "Still haven't grown accustomed to this place, I see."

"Did you expect me to?"

"Not really." He breathes out, a puff of smoke following, curling around itself like an ominous cloud. "Just disappointed."

An odd silence follows, one that's neither awkward nor comfortable, and in that silence is the question you've patiently waited to ask since he brought you to this odd, whimsical world, hanging precariously in limbo.

"What is it?" His words cut through the air like the fine edge of a sword and you startle. "Well?"

"It's just-" The faint memory of Gaara's heedings give you pause, careful not to offend him and sow the dangerous repercussions. "It’s nothing."

"I won't eat you alive, or whatever that annoying nymph whispered in your ear."

"Can you read my mind?" You seriously contemplate it for a moment, mortified by the implication.

"You're just predictable."

You pout, oddly insulted. "Oh yeah? Then what was I going to ask?"

He breathes in another puff of smoke, mood shifting into something darker, brooding, sad? "Beats me."

"Liar." You're voice is quiet, so quiet you hesitate to even call it a whisper, still he shoots you a side eyed glare that would have sent you fleeing had this been your first encounter; but you’ve spent several moons - or lack thereof, you suppose - by his side, and after all the stories, and meals, and wine you've shared, and all the nights you’ve spent beneath the same comforter and the same twinkling stars, you think you’ve began to understand him, trust him, even if just a little. "I was just wondering when I can return home, is all."

He sighs, as if he isn't surprised at all. "Are all humans as ungrateful as you?"

"Are all fae as stubborn as you?"

"You sure are bold, I'll give you that." He exhales, puffs of smoke greeting the air. "And rude, I nearly forgot that one."

You laugh, genuinely and he turns to face you, study you like you're the first thing he can't figure out. "You don't like it here? Have I not provided you with the finest amenities? Have I offended you in some way?"

You pull at the grass tickling your thighs. "Its not that."

He places his hand over your busy one. "Then stay."

You shake your head and turn to face him. "Shikamaru I-" His lips find yours and you freeze like startled deer, but it's certainly not because you don't like it - though he doesn't know that, slowly pulling away at your hesitance.

"Then it's me you don't like?"

You're slower to respond this time. You certainly don't dislike Shikamaru - though he gets on your nerves more often than not and nothing gets through that thick, but brilliant skull of his. The problem, you figure, is that you've never once considered liking the fae, even before Gaara's headings, as if the fear and distrust is engraved in your very bones. There's also the fact that he whisked you away from the only place you'd ever known, but you can't hate him for that, not when the alternative was freezing to death.

So you flirt with the idea, ruminate over the premise of Shikamaru being human, of meeting him in better, warmer circumstances, of telling stories and drinking beneath the moon from your boring, mundane world. And you think you might like him, quite a bit, in fact.

"No."

"No?"

You smile at his confusion, and for the first time, you find him cute. Which is a terrible realization because it makes you want to lean in and press your lips to his and - by the gods - why are you actually doing it?

He chuckles softly, setting the pipe aside and pulling you in by the back of your neck when you shyly try to back away. "Humans never finish what they start, huh?"

And his lips are on yours, with the fervor he wanted to kiss you with the first time; and it's magical and deep and lulls you into a haze deeper than the strange world around you - but you're not sure it's magic at all. You're just drunk on Shikamaru, and you want more, more, more until you're addicted and ruined and at the mercy of his whims.

"Wanted to do that," he groans, tongue mingling with yours. "Since the moment I saw you."

"The moment you saw me?"

"Mhm," his hand travels beneath the hem of your dress, wandering the expanse of your thigh and up to your hip, and when you don't pull away from his touch, further even. "Saw you with that forest nymph, in that pretty little dress. Wanted to see your eyes light up from up close when you tell me all your stories." His slender fingers dip beneath the cotton of your panties. "Wanted you to look at me, think of me, be so enamored with me that you didn't want to leave."

You whine, shuddering against him when he presses two fingers against your core, using your slick to rub circles against your clit. "Sh-Shikamaru." You breathe and he tenses before moving to trail kisses across your jaw.

"Mm, just like that. Wanted you to say my name, all breathless and cute."

"This is wrong, right?" You bury your head beneath his chin, hiding your burning cheeks. What would your mother think if she knew the things you were doing with this - this monster, as she called them, let alone your village; they'd send you to a monastery at best, and at worst, sacrifice you to the forest.

Oddly enough, Shikamaru comes to mind and that thought isn't as scary as it would have been once.

"You humans are so uptight." His free hand cups your jaw, forcing your gaze to meet his. "Do you like me?" You swallow hard, trying to turn away but he holds you steady; and he waits, waits until you nod, meek and slow. "Does this feel good?" He dips his fingers into the softness of your core, fingers thrusting against your gooey walls with just enough pressure to have your eyes rolling back; somewhere in your stupor you must have nodded because he continues, "Then what's wrong with it?"

You're at a loss for words and he smiles, fingers driving you mad. "Not a thing." He kisses you almost sweetly. "Right?" You moan against his mouth, falling into the baritone of his voice and the care in his affections. "Hold still, just like that. Good girl."

His fingertips are back against your clit, working you over with a fervor that has your thighs shaking and chest heaving in a desperate attempt to just, breathe. You've never felt anything like it, like your body is on the verge of catching fire, and you're chasing the flame, begging Shikamaru to set you alight.

And when the heat washes over your body, you cling so desperately to him, tears wetting your cheeks. Thighs squeezing around his hand, you swear you hear him laugh when you push weakly at his wrist - but he doesn't stop, not until the shaking ceases and your slick coats your thighs.

You collapse against his chest, exhausted, clinging to the soft and unfamiliar material of his cloak. You feel him shift, shuffle you into his arms and stand - but you can't be bothered to open your eyes, even when he's pulling the boots from your feet and laying you gently upon silk sheets. "Look at me." You whine, trying to roll over to your side but he throws a leg over you, weight holding you down. "Listen to me, pretty."

You finally open your eyes, peeking up at him through dark lashes, a blush rushing up the expanse of your neck at his choice of words. Something hard twitches against your stomach and Shikamaru sighs, "Are you not going to finish what you started?"

You're exhausted, but you've never seen him look so eager, desperate, needy - looking all the more beautiful colored in the warm orange of the fireplace, and in that moment you'd bend over backwards, lay down your life, let him consume your entire being if that would please him. "What should I do?"

"Such a sweet, considerate thing," he muses, fingers creeping up your thighs to hook into the waistband of your panties before he's dragging them down your thighs. "Can you do the rest?"

He helps you sit, reaches around to undo the button holding the back of your dress, and you nod, shaking palms finding the hem before pulling it over your head. His fingers dance over your shoulders, calming your nerves as they gently work to undo your bra. He's quick about it and you eye him with suspicion. You’d heard stories from your friends, about their clumsy, clueless husbands, and you expect the same from Shikamaru, but like everything, he’s so sure about everything he's doing. "You're certainly good at that."

He grins, taking in your exposed being, devouring you with his gaze. "I've lived a long time, pretty. Does that bother you?"

The jealousy creeps up your chest but you wretch your gaze away and grumble out an unconvincing, "No."

Palms smooth down your sides and he leans in close, hot breath against your ear. "Don't be jealous, you're certainly the prettiest." He doesn't miss the way you shudder, grasp at his shirt as you buck against him, like instinct. "Careful now, I might forget to be gentle with you." He holds your wrist, places your palm flush against his clothed erection; you're embarrassed but you don't pull away, even daring to rub your fingers up and down the generous bulge.

He groans and you feel your pride swell, if only for the moment before he strips himself of his top and pushes you down. His pants follow and you prop yourself up on your elbows, unable to look away as he rids himself of the last barrier between your bodies. He catches you staring and stands a little taller, fisting his cock with one hand, as if he's showing off. You want to roll your eyes, call out his arrogance - but you can't even fault him; besides you’re too preoccupied wondering how it’s supposed to fit.

"Can you take it, pretty?" It's rhetorical you're sure, because he doesn't wait for an answer, just fits himself between your thighs, presses your knees to your chest and prods at your entrance with the tip of his cock.

Even that proves too much and he shushes your babbling lips, pressing kisses to the corner of your mouth as he inches in further. "Hurts Shikamaru, can't."

"You can." He pulls back just to push in further this time and you cry out, fingers pulling at his strands of dark hair until the elastic pops and it falls over his shoulders in disarray. "I promise you can. Trust me, yeah?"

You whimper, burying your head in the crook of his neck. "Okay."

"Such a good girl," he coos, rocking his hips into yours. "So pretty and willing." The burn starts to fade and you keen against him. "Just like I thought you'd be."

"Like you thought I'd be?" Something about that sets you off, upsets you a bit.

He smirks, "Such a docile creature, you'd do anything I ask wouldn't you, pretty?" His fingers skim the expanse of your hips, easing himself in further. "Even your attitude is cute, because I know it's just to hide that your scared, like a frightened little rabbit."

He misses the scowl contorting your face, annoyance in your brow. You huff, nails dragging down his biceps as you jut your hips upward, ignoring the stretch, the pain, the burn, too focused on the way Shikamaru loses his balance, falls forward in a clumsy, inelegant sort of way - you feel yourself drip at the moan he breathes against your ear.

"I guess even you can be wrong sometimes," you quip breathlessly, ego growing to dangerous, and stupid proportions. "But it's fine since you're cute, like a dumb little rabbit."

Several moments pass before he finally pushes himself up, eyes set upon you like a predator that's just found it's prey, narrowed and dark and void of any amusement.

Your smirk disappears.

"Oh pretty," he sighs, slender fingers wrapping around your throat in a gentle but threatening hold. "I thought I warned you to be careful."

You blink and suddenly you're on top, looking down at a very upset faerie - a terrible place to be but certainly not worse than being beneath him, right? "I'm going to give you a chance to apologize."

You're quick to take it, willing to be anything besides on Shikamaru's bad side, even pathetic. So you squeak out a desperate, "I'm sorry!"

He only laughs, but it's flat and dry and you feel a chill crawl up your spine. "You think that's what I meant? Adorable."

His cock twitches inside you and you shudder. "I'll do anything."

"Yes, you will." His fingers bruise your hips in their merciless grip. "You're going to bounce on my cock, pretty." He pulls you down by the back of your neck, lips slanting over your own. "And you're not going to stop until I spill my seed inside you."

Your body moves before your mind stops reeling, hips rutting against him with reckless abandon, as if you're bewitched. "So eager to please," he groans, hand trailing up your side to caress your breast. His thumb brushes the nipple and it hardens beneath his touch. You whine softly, keening into his touch and he smirks, hips rising to meet yours and you swear you can feel him in your stomach. Your nails nearly pierce his shoulders as you cry out his name but his grin only widens, "That's a much better use of that smart mouth of yours."

Whatever witty retort you were going to spout dies on your tongue the moment his hand slips between your bodies to cup your sex, fingertips at your clit. "You'll give me another, won't you?" Your legs shake, already sensitive from the last. "You'll be even prettier this time, when you cum around my cock."

"Sorry, 'm sorry Shikamaru," you stammer as the heat gathers in your stomach, teetering precariously on the edge of spilling over. Your legs burn and you struggle to force enough air into your lungs, still you bounce atop him, with more and more fervor until his hand tightens against the back of your neck, holding you down against his chest as you shudder and shake, tumbling over the edge helplessly. His hips take over, thrusting into you until you feel his hot seed spill down your thighs.

Shikamaru's firm chest is suddenly the softest thing on earth, his labored breathing against the crackling fire the most tender of lullabies and you feel your conscious fade.

Only his taunting chuckle follows.

The world is warm and plush and smells like home. You sigh contentedly, stretching out your arms until they hit something soft, knocking it from the bed and sending it tumbling across the floor. Your tired eyes reluctantly open, instinctively reaching out to grab whatever it was, fingers freezing mid reach.

The stuffed bear you've owned since you were six stares back at you.

You jolt up, fingertips smoothing over the yellow quilt covering your body and the tears prick your eyes. You're home.

Your heart swells, soles hitting the wooden floorboards with a familiar creak. There's a burn to your thighs and you wince, stumbling forward and nearly over. A pair of steady hands catch you and the scent of smoke and sandalwood fills your senses. You lift your head to catch Shikamaru's gaze. "Why-" You worry the skin of your bottom lip and he grins.

"Why what? Isn't this what you wanted? Or are you that shocked by my generosity."

You snort. "-why are you here?"

His sigh is a disappointed one as he goads you back towards the bed. "Careful, you'll hurt my feelings." You sit on the edge, watching as he picks up your bear by one scraggly leg. He shoots you a look before tossing it into your lap. "This is the life you whined about returning to?" His hand lands atop the footboard of your bed; it creaks under his weight and he shifts just to drive his point home further. You swear the wood nearly gives out.

"Would you quit that?"

He shrugs, making his way to your side. "Were you hoping I wouldn't be here? That I disappeared like a bad dream?" He leans in, hot breath against your ear. "Though you were singing a different tune last night." You elbow him, glare verging on turning him to burning ash. He chuckles, giving you just enough space to breathe. "Well?"

You play with the stuffed bear, avoiding his waiting gaze. "I mean-" You lift the fluffy arm and press on its stomach. "I'd probably miss you - eventually." You set it aside, busying yourself with your fingers instead. "Just a little."

His hand covers yours and you startle when his fingers intertwine with yours. "Then return with me."

"Shikamaru-"

"Not now, and not forever.” There’s a lopsided grin on his face when he adds a provocative, "well, probably."

You glare but he ignores it and presses a kiss to your shoulder, sliding the strap of your nightgown to the side. "Just visit me, like that forest nymph you're so fond of." There’s a hint of annoyance in his voice, jealousy even and he takes your skin between his teeth and sucks. "No. Stay longer, more, forever if you want to. Don't run away when night falls, stay with me. Stay until you're sick of me, and come back anyway."

You can't see it, but you imagine there's a bruise as purple as Gaara's violets painted across your shoulder. Shikamaru presses against it with rough fingers and it stings just a bit. "And stop telling him your stories, they're mine now. You're mine now."

You consider it but the instigator on your shoulder quips back with an indignant, "And if I don't?"

He grins, eyes sparkling with mischief. "I'll eat you."

You can only hope he's joking.

#shikamaru #shikamaru x reader #shikamaru x you #shikamaru x y/n #naruto #naruto x reader #naruto x you #naruto x y/n #naruto smut #shikamaru smut #aaahhhh #i'd love to write more of this if yall like it #even if yall dont #though its nice to know im not screaming into the void </3 #shikamaru being mean and manipulative makes me go brRRrr #and add fantasy to the mix?#ooh baby

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