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misnomera · 4 years ago

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On racial stereotyping of the Haans in TMA...

Right so as someone who is ethnically Chinese I have NO FUCKING clue how I didn’t notice this more distinctly in my initial binge of tma (going too fast and not paying closer attention to character names and descriptions, probably) but the Haan family storyline is, all horror elements aside, pretty fucked up in terms of racial representation re: stereotyping. This got long as hell, but please please please take a moment to read through if you’ve got time for it. thanks.

To start off, the Haans are one of the few characters in tma with an explicitly specified race and ethnicity—Chinese—and pretty much the only explicitly Chinese characters in tma, other than the mostly unimportant librarian (Zhang Xiaoling) from Beijing. But like, Haan isn’t even a properly Chinese surname, at least not in the way that it’s spelled in canon (it should be Han, one a. A quick google search tells me that Haan as a surname has...Dutch origins??).

Of course, that could be chalked up to shoddy anglicization processes within family histories, which certainly isn’t uncommon with immigrant families, so I’m not going to dwell on names too much (although I also find it interesting that John Haan’s name is so specifically and weirdly anglicized that he changed his own surname?? Hun Yung to John Haan is a very big leap of a name change and frankly not very believable. ANYWAY, this is not that important. I don’t expect Jonny, a white Englishman, to come up with perfectly unquestionable non-Cho-Chang-like Chinese names, though it certainly would be nice. Moving on).

What really bothers me about the Haans is how they almost exclusively and explicitly play into negative Chinese immigrant stereotypes. I don’t even feel like I need to say it because it’s like...it’s literally Right There, folks. John Haan (in ep 72) owns and operates a sketchy takeout restaurant. They’re all avatars of the Flesh—and John Haan is Specifically horrific and terrifying because he cooked his wife’s human meat and fed it to his unknowing customers. Does that remind you of any stereotypes which accuse Chinese people of consuming societally unacceptable and ethically questionable things like dog/cat/bat meat (which, if it’s not already crystal fucking clear, we don’t. do that.), which in turn characterize us as horrible unfeeling monsters? John Haan’s characterization feeds (haha, badum tss) directly into this harmful stereotype that have caused very real pain for Chinese people and East Asians in general.

And Jonny does nothing to address that from within his writing (and not out of it either). And, speaking on a more meta level, Jonny could’ve easily had these flesh avatars be individuals of any race (like, what’s Jared Hopworth’s ethnicity? Do we know? No? Well then). Conversely, he could’ve easily, easily had a Chinese person be an avatar of any other entity. So why did he have to chose specifically the Flesh?

(This is a rhetorical question. You know why. Racial stereotyping and invoking a fear of the other in an attempt to enhance horror, babey~)

On Tom Haan’s side, Jonny seems weirdly intent on having other characters repeatedly comment on his accent (or rather, lack thereof) in relation to his race. Think about how, in ep 30 (killing floor), the fact that Tom Haan had spoken a line to the statement giver in “perfect English” was an emphasized beat in that statement, and a beat that was supposed to be “chilling” and meant to signify to us that something was, quote-unquote, “not right” with Tom Haan. Implicitly, that’s saying that it was unexpected, not “normal”, and in this case even eerie, for someone who looks Chinese to have spoken in fluid, unbroken English. Mind you, the line itself was perfectly scary on its own (“you cannot stop the slaughter by closing the door”), so why did Jonny feel the need to note the accent in which it was spoken in? Why did Jonny HAVE to have that statement giver note, that he initially “wasn’t even sure how much English [Haan] spoke”?

This happens again in episode 72 with a Chinese man (and again, his ethnicity is Explicitly Noted) who we assume is also Tom Haan. This one is rather ironically funny and kind of painfully self aware, because the statement giver expresses surprise at Haan’s “crisp RP accent” and then immediately “felt bad about making the assumption that he couldn’t speak English,” and subsequently admitted that thought was “low-key racist.” Like, from a writing perspective, this entire passage is roundabout, pointless, and says absolutely nothing helpful to enhance the horror genre experience for listeners (instead it just sounded like some sort of half-assed excuse so Jonny or other listeners could say “look! We’ve addressed the racism!” You didn’t. It just made me vaguely uncomfortable). And again, having other people comment on our accents/lack thereof while assuming we are foreign is a Very Real microaggression that east asians face on the daily. If Jonny needed some filler sentences for pacing he could’ve written about Literally anything else. So why point out, yet again, that the crazy murderous man was foreign and Chinese?

At this point, you might say, right, but yknow, it was just that the statement givers were kind of racist! It happens! Yeah sure, ok, that’s a passable in-universe explanation for descriptions of Tom Haan (though not John Haan, mind you), but the statement givers are fake made up people, and statement’s still written by Jonny, who absolutely has all the power to write overt discrimination out of his stories. And he does! Think about just how many minor (and major!!) characters are so, so carefully written as completely aracial, and do not have their ethnicity implicated at all in whatever horrors they may or may not be committing. Think about how many lgbtq+ characters have given statements, and have been in statements, without having faced direct forms of discrimination, or portrayed as embodying blatant stereotypes in their stories (though lgbtq+ rep in tma certainly has their own issues that I won’t go into here). Jonny can clearly write characters this way, and he can do it well. So why, why, am I being constantly, repeatedly reminded in-text of the fact that the Haans are East Asian, that they’re from China, that they’re Chinese immigrants, that they’re second-generation British Chinese or whatever the fuck, and that they’re also horrifying conduits for blood, gore, and general fucked-up-ness? It’s absolutely not something that is Needed for the stories to be an effective piece of horror; the only thing it does is perpetuate incredibly harmful and hurtful stereotypes.

And listen, I love tma to bits. It’s taken over my blog. I’ve really loved my interactions with the fandom. And I am consistently blown away by Jonny’s writing and how well he’s able to weave foreshadowing and plot into an incredibly complex collection of stories. But I absolutely Cannot stop thinking about the Haans because it’s just. It’s such a blatant display of racial stereotyping in writing. And I’ve certainly seen a few voices talking about it here and there, and I don’t know if I’m just not looking in the right places, but it certainly feels like something that is just straight up not on the radar for a lot of tma fans. And I’m disappointed about that.

Just, I don’t know. Take a look at those episodes again and do some of your own thinking about why these characters had to be specifically Chinese (answer: they didn’t.). And in general, PLEASE for the love of god turn a critical eye on character portrayals and descriptions whenever they are assigned specific races/ethnicities (Some examples that come to mind are Jude Perry, Annabelle Cane, and Diego Molina), because similar issues, to an extent, extend beyond the Haans, though I haven’t covered them here.

You shouldn’t need a POC to do point out these problems for you when they’re so glaringly There. But for those of you who really didn’t know, hope this was informative in some way. I’m tired, man. If some of the only significant Chinese characters you write are violent cannibalistic men with a perverted relationship with meat, just don’t do it. Please don’t do it.

EDIT: Since the making of this post Jonny has acknowledged and apologized for these portrayals on his twitter and in the Rusty Quill Operations Update, which went up September 2020. A long time coming, but better late than never. This of course doesn’t necessarily negate the harm done by Jonny’s writing, and doesn’t make me much less angry about it, but is appreciated nonetheless. For more on this topic there’s a lot of productive discussions happening in my “#tma crit” tag and in the notes of this post

#tma #the magnus archives #magnuspod #tma 30 #tma 72 #tma crit #racism #sinophobia #racist stereotyping #tw cannibalism #tw violence #long post #tom haan #john haan

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is-that-another-soulmate-au · 4 years ago

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Sun Touched Zuko AU!!

Tag list @chaoticidiott @mypureessence @fae-tales-personal

This won't be a soulmate AU but it will be Zukka for sure.

Zuko was born sick, so sick in fact that he was going to die. His mother prayed to Agni that he would live, prayed that the sun spirit would save her first born son. In the gardens she held him up to the Setting sun pleading. The suns rays caught in the amber stone on top of the alter set for worship and moved to Zuko's eyes. His hair changed from solid black to a golden blonde, he opened eyes and began to cry. He was touched by the Sun and lived.

Ursa couldnt have been more happy, her son was alive. "My little sunshine" she whispered with tears rolling down her cheeks as she held him close and rocked him in her arms.

When Ozai saw his son's golden hair he demanded that it be dyed black, but was willing to compromise when Ursa suggested they wait until he turns 5 so that the dyes don't harm him.

The first time they dyed his hair he asked his mom why, his bright molten eyes looking at her with confusion "because your father wants you to feel safer my sunshine, people will stare at you with that bright shining hair of yours"

"Oh, okay" was his only response that day. He never questioned it anymore when they touched up his roots weekly.

After his mother left him he felt alone in the world, his dad still staining his golden hair each week with more and more ink. All the while berating him when he couldnt control his fire well. Even with being touched by the spirit and having powerful fire he couldnt manage to control it, couldnt understand how to. Until master Piandou taught him swords and he applied his teachings to his fire.

The first time he used his swords to control the fire Piandou was more than impressed "Prince Zuko! That was amazing!"

"Thank you Master, thinking of the swords as an extension helped me control the flames better" his smile soon faded when his father appeared

"Yes, great work Zuko, I am pleased to see you have learned how to control your flames, however mixing these arts in this fashion is unacceptable. Come with me"

After that he wasn't allowed back at Piandou's unless he was accompanied by either his father, or an advisor to make sure he practiced correctly.

On the day of his fated Agni Kai Zuko had just gotten his roots retouched before entering the war meeting. When his father burnt him for speaking out of term his tears felt like lava running down his cheeks. He could smell the fresh dye burning and it hurt his lungs.

His Uncle immediately took him under his wing when he was banished "Zuko, my star," his Uncle pleaded when they were at the western airtemple "i need to dress your wound, the sun spirit would not want you to lose your eye"

Zuko reluctantly let his Uncle clean and dress his wound several times on their travels until it healed and scarred over. When it finally healed over Iroh smiled "there you go sunshine" he said as he wiped the tears forming in Zuko's good eye away "do not cry Prince Zuko, you are safe"

He still dyed his roots every week to uphold his place as prince. He did not know that his golden hair was his own symbol or royalty, that the sun chose him. Sure he knew the sun saved him, but he could not understand that it was because he was chosen.

When he arrived at the South pole and discovered the Avatar, he felt a breath of relief wash over him. He was going home, but he heavily underestimated the Avatar's abilities and lost him.

Soon he started a cat and mouse game with the monk and his two southern water tribe friends. After the northpole he slacked on dying his hair, not because he didnt want to, he simply didn't have the resources to do so. So his roots started to grow in gold.

"Well your looking golden Zuzu" Azula's voice startled Zuko when he walked into the hut they were staying in.

"Azula, what are you doing here" he glared at his younger sister

"You know, im my country. We greet one another before asking questions" she responded coldly "i was just passing through"

"To what do we owe the pleasure of your visit Princess Azula?" Iroh piped into the conversation

"No wonder you two click, always so quick and to the point. Father sent me, family is suddenly very important to him." She turned her head to look out the window "father regrets your banishment. He wants you home"

Zuko was frozen in place "father regrets?"

"I can see you need time to think this through, ill be by to collect you in the morning" Azula smiled softly before a flash of worry flashed on her face for a split second as she walked out the door.

When Azula's true intentions were revealed Zuko and Iroh managed to flee from her and her soldiers. When they stopped at the river to cut their hair Zuko looked at Iroh when he watched the inky hair fall into the river "your gold hair will conceal your identity fairly well my nephew"

"Yeah, it'll hide me pretty well" nobody had seen Zuko with his golden hair before. He hadnt seen his hair fully gold since age five.

On their travels his hair grew fairly fast now that it wasnt being dyed so often. It would catch the eye of several earth kindom citizens when he passed through towns. When he and Iroh were sitting against a building with a hat in front of them a young woman approached them and slipped a few gold pieces in "I know this might sound creepy, and I'm only asking this because I cannot resist. But may I kiss your hair sir? You can say no, I won't take my money back."

Zuko flushed a light shade of pink and scratched the back of his head "uhm, s-sure?" He mumbled out and leaned his head towards her. She placed a tender almost motherly kiss to the top of his head.

"Oh, your hair is so beautiful sir, it's like a million rays of sun. I wish you luck, i can only spare a little but if you'd take these small meals Im sure they'd help you" she said while offering two wrapped meals

They accepted and thanked her with small bows "what a nice young lady, huh?" Iroh said and nudged Zuko's arm

"Yeah, she was very nice"

When Zuko and Iroh found Azula and Aang battling in an abandoned earth town Azula pointed out his hair "wow Zuzu! You look just like a star! Where'd all that ink go?" When the fight ended and Iroh was injured Zukos cheeks felt like magma was pouring from his eyes.

"Zuko, I can hel-" Katara approached them

"LEAVE!" Zuko cried out, turning to Katara with golden tears running down his face.

While on the Ferry to Ba Sing Se Zuko was angry, not angry at anyone or anything in particular, he was just angry. "Hey" the voice of a man at his right side broke his brooding "names Jet"

"Lee" Zuko muttered out how cover name

"Yknow Lee, I hear the captain is eating like a king while we're stuck eating all his left overs" he paused "want to help me... liberate some food rations?"

It didn't take much to convince Zuko to join him. They liberated the food quickly without getting caught. Zuko found himself wandering the the front of the lower deck, leaning on the railing. "You know, as soon as I saw your scar, I knew exactly who you were" he paused as he approached Zuko "youre a refugee, like me. Thing is though, I've never seen hair like yours, let along your eyes."

Jet reached out and brushed Zuko's hair out of his face. "The freedom fighters could use a starlight like you, what do you say?"

Zuko smacked Jets hand away gently "thanks, but no thanks, you don't want me on your team, trust me"

In Ba Sing Se Iroh and Zuko made a life for themselves. They managed to have their own tea shop and apartment. Things were doing great, until Zuko went after the Avatar's bison, mind you he went there originally to take the bison captive, but when he saw that the creature was hurt he sheathed his swords and removed his mask, letting his golden hair free as he approached the bison "hey buddy, are you okay?" His voice was much softer than usual "oh no, here let me help you, this is going to hurt and I'm sorry, but I need to pull out this thorn" he talked to him the whole time he was pulling out thorns, gently rubbing the fur near it to sooth him.

When he pulled all of the thorns out he took out his swords "alright buddy, dont worry about the swords, im going to use them to cut you out of these chains, shhh its okay, you're okay" he continued to talk him through each of the six shackles "there we go big guy, now you need to get out of here, go find your friends- ah! Hey!" Appa knocked him over and gave him a thanks with a big sloppy dog like lick across his torso and face before taking off.

"You did well my nephew" Zuko shot up at his uncle's voice

"Uncle?" His startled voice wavered

"Now lets get you out of here and back home." And that they did.

When they made it back to their apartment Zuko felt dizzy, he held his head in his hand "I dont feel good" he managed to get out before collapsing and breaking a vase

"Zuko!" Iroh shouted as he rushed to his nephew to make sure he didnt hurt himself on any broken glass.

In his Angst coma Sokka heard his mother singing

"You are my sunshine, my only sunshine. You make me Happy! When skies are grey. You'll never know dear, how much I love you, so please don't hide my sunshine away"

His sisters voice mocked his hair "youre hair makes you look like a dandelion, a weed can't take the throne!" Her cackling filled his ears.

There was a blinding light and a woman appeared with flowing gold hair and bright fire eyes "my dear star, why do you let yourself hurt so much?"

"I don't, who are you?"

"I'm Agni my dear, you do know I chose you right?"

"Why?"

"You are special my dear, your mother made sure to get my attention and I am so glad she did" the woman spoke as she placed her hand on his cheek. Filling him with the image of her reaching out to kiss his eyes as a baby. "You are meant for great things little star." Her voice faded as she herself did

He soon woke from his coma with a fresh breath. Taking charge in making sure his Uncle's tea shop did well, and helping him where he could. However Azula soon found them and summoned them to the palace under the guise of serving tea to the king. Things didnt end well and Zuko was thrown into a cave beneath the City with Katara.

"Why would they throw you in here!" Her angry and hurt voice filled his ears as he tried not to make her feel more uncomfortable by staying as far from her as possible.

when she mentioned her mother he turned around and spoke "thats something we have in common"

"What?"

"My mother was my only source of safety... she was the only one who defended me against my sister and my father. And one day my father was ordered to... do something terrible and my mother protected me somehow, I dont know what happened but when I was half awake she told me goodbye and when I fully woke up she was gone."

When they were separated and Azula had Iroh trapped she approached "Zuko, nows your chance to come home. Help me defeat the avatar and you can come home. Without inking your hair. Isnt this what you've always wanted? You'll have your honor back, you'll have fathers love back"

And despite all he had gone through he still chose the path of returning to his father. When he did return his father wanted to dye his hair but Azula spoke up against it "father, if I may. Zuko's hair is a symbol of the fire goddess Agni, if he were to take the thrown it'd be best to show that she has chosen him"

"Yes, that is true. Alright, off with you two"

Reuniting with Mai wasnt smooth, she confessed to him that her and Ty Lee connected and while he was saddened he just smiled "I'm glad you two are with eachother, you work well"

On the day of Black sun, with the information he had learned from Iroh and armed with the fact that his father was practically powerless without his bending. He approached him.

"Zuko, what are you doing here?"

"Im here to tell the truth"

Ozai let out a snort "telling the truth during an eclipse?" He waved off his gaurds "what do you have to say"

"First of all, Azula lied to you, she was the one who shot down the avatar"

"What?! Why would she lie about that?"

"Because the avatars not dead, he's probably leading this invasion right now"

"Get out! Get out if you know what's good for you!"

"Thats another thing, I'm not taking orders from you anymore"

"You will obey me or face the consequences!" As Ozai stood Zuko drew his dual swords and took a stance

"Think again. I am going to speak my mind and you are going to listen"

He went on to question his father "you knew Agni chose me as a child and that was the reason my hair turned gold. You knew this and yet you hid that from the world, you darkened my hair for years, and you have the gull to tell me I was lucky to be born. You! The tyrannical leader set out to destroy the world. you! My own father challenged me to an Agni Kai just for speaking out of term, how could you possibly justify a duel with a child!"

"It was to teach you respect!"

"It was cruel and it was wrong"

"Then you have learned nothing!"

"No! I've learned everything, and I've had to do most of it on my own" he paused "Growing up we were taught that the war was our nations way of spread joy, what an incredible lie that was, the other nations don't love us, they fear us, and they are right to fear us, we've brought the world to an era of hate and suffering, now we need to fill it with one of peace and joy"

"Your uncle has gotten to you hasnt he" Ozai laughed

"Yes, he has, and I've come to another decision, im going to join the avatar, and im going to help him take you down."

After announcing this he turned to leave but stayed to learn about what happened to his mother

"She's alive?" He said in a soft voice as a single golden tear rolled down his cheek

"Perhaps," Ozai paused "now i see that banishment is far too small of a punishment for treason" he said as he gathered lightning and shot it at Zuko who quickly redirected it right back at him before escaping.

After finding that Iroh had broken out of prison Zuko fled the firenation in a small war ballon and followed the Avatar's Sky bison to the western air temples. Their first encounter didn't go so well and he managed to burn Toph's feet but after helping them defeat the assassin and managing to form his words more properly and giving a genuine apology to Toph he was on the team.

Some time after joining and managing to break Sokka's dad, Suki and Chit Sang out of prison they were all sitting around the fire. "So.. uhm Zuko" Aang started

Zuko turned to look at him "yeah?"

"I have to ask, pretty bunch nobody in the firenation has golden blonde hair right?" Zuko absentmindedly ran his fingers through his hair at the question

"Yeah, and when you were first chasing us your hair was black, whats up with that?" Sokka added

"Oh, uh, well my hair was always dyed black because my father doesn't like my gold hair..." he paused "when I was born, I was sick, so sick that my parents thought I was going to die. But my mother pleaded with Agni to spare me, she took me to the sun worship alter in the palace gardens at sunset and held me up, pleading. When the last ray of light from Agni, my hair turned golden and I began to cry. So, in a sense the sun gave me my life"

"Like Yue!" Sokka piped up

"Like who?"

"Princess Yue! She was born sick just like you, and the moon spirit saved her. Well, she's the moon spirit now"

"Woah woah wait, is this the girlfriend you said turned into the moon?"

"Yep!"

"Well, just don't go falling for Zuko now, dont want to have your first boyfriend turn into the sun" Suki teased him

"Hey, at least I'd have a full set of spirit lovers"

Zuko's face turned beet red and the group laughed at him. Over the next few weeks of them being in close quarters Zuko found that he was growing feelings for the water tribe boy. Anytime he'd look at him he felt his stomach do a flip. But he didnt have time to think about his feelings.

Even though the sun touched prince tried not to think about Sokka on the mission with Katara, he couldn't help it. When they were returning Katara piped up "I know you like him" she paused to watch his surprised face "its okay you know, its fine if you like him. I dont have like you to let my brother like you. I may be cold to you but im not a monster like your father" she tied off the sentence by staring off "and besides, if Agni chose you, I think you would be safe for Sokka"

When they got back he heard sokka shout "You're back! Thank La youre safe!" Turning to Katara he expected to see Sokka running to hug his sister. Instead he was tackled to the ground with a hug from Sokka "how did it go Katara?" He asked from the ground while quite literally snuggling into Zuko with this hug that was still very much happening.

"I found him, and he was just so pathetic, i couldnt kill him"

Sokka then stood up and helped Zuko to his feet and placed a quick sneaky kiss to his cheek before moving to hug his sister, leaving Zuko frozen in confusion. He remained frozen until Suki came up to him "he's trying to confess silently, he's weird like that, corner him later if you want to hear an actual confession"

He however didn't manage to corner the now seemingly overly flirty blue boy until they were at ember Island. It wasnt until just before bed when Sokka was walking past Zuko's bedroom door. He reached out grabbed Sokka's shirt and yanked him into the room before slamming the door shut and pinning him to it. "What are you doing?"

"Wh-what do you mean? You're the one who dragged me into your room, what are you doing?"

"Dont play dumb with me Sokka, you've been flirting with me since I got back from my trip with your sist-"

"Actually ive been flirting with you since the temples, you just didn't notice until I kissed you"

"You mean until you missed"

"What?"

Zuko smirked "you missed" he mumbled before leaning closer "you went for a kiss but you missed"

They ended up spending the night sharing a room and a bed. When the morning sun peaked through the windows Zuko curled back into sokka who in turn pulled him closer. Both refusing to wake up until Katara knocked on the door and opened it "breakfast is ready, if you two love birds want some warm food you better hury and I better not see any hickeys"

"Ugh! Katara we just cuddled!" Sokka said as he burried his face in Zuko's hair.

Katara simply laughed "alright, but still, hury up."

When the day of the comet came and Zuko had to separate from Sokka he saw the worry in his blue eyes "Ive got this Sokka, Agnj chose me remembe, besides, I've got Katara with me and she's powerful" he placed a quick kiss to Sokka's lips "go take down those ships, and I'll see you by the timd the sun rises tomorrow."

And he was right, even though he was shot with lightning and Sokka broke his leg they both came out of the battle alive and together. When Zuko woke up to find Sokka curled up against him he smiled and let out a soft breath of pink fire. Relief.

"Woah, do that again" Sokka's groggy 'just woke up' voice rumbled against his shoulder

"Sorry I didn't mean to wake you, do you mean this?" He let out another breath of fire, this time a pale purple

"I didn't know you could do other colors of fire"

"Well, I couldn't until I went to the sunwarriors, Agni spoke to me there"

After Zuko's Coronation the firenation began righting their wrongs. It was a long struggle for sure. However two years into his reign with Sokka having practically moved in he found that he would soon have a partner to help him through these struggles.

The day had only just begun but Sokka was dragging Zuko to the turtleduck pond where they often sat together to simply relax. Sokka seemed a little antsy this time though "what's wrong Sokka?"

"Uhm, well, I have something I need to ask you," he paused and reached into his pocket while sinkning down to one knee. Zuko's breath caught in his throat as he saw Sokka pull out a betrothal becklace, the band was made with a fine red silk and the center piece was gold with a carving of a sun with a wave inside of it. "Zuko," he took a shaky breath "you've been by my side for two years now, you've held my hand through war and peace, quite literally, and you've done so while loving me whole heartedly. I can't imagine my life without you in it." Zuko could feel golden tears threatening to fall fram his molten eyes "Zuko, will you marry me?"

"Yes!" He heard himself responding before he could even think "Agni, yes Sokka, of course I'll marry you!"

Sokka moved from his kneeling position to lifting Zuko up into a kiss, holding him right under his rear. Zuko held his face in his hands as he pressed his lips to Sokka's as he was lifted up quite unceremoniously.

Once he was set down Sokka helped him put on the betrothal necklace. He reached up to touch the Golden pendant and smiled up at Sokka with gold tears falling down his cheeks.

Their marraige was held not long after, joining the southern water tribe and the firenation in a strong Union with a mixed culture wedding blues, silvers, reds and golds filled the wedding and reception as well as suns and moons.

Agni smiled down on the wedding that day, her chosen sunshine found his moon.

Yue smiled on them that night as they stood on the balcony holding one another. The boy who protected her finally found his light.

>Woo boy that was a long one! I sure hope you enjoyed it!<

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ssvgawara · 4 years ago

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Haikyuu boys and some oddly specific crime they’d commit

a/n: I come back and the first thing I write is a shitpost!! enjoy </3 tw for drugs, murder, alcohol and general crime committing xoxo

Karasuno

Daichi- he’s a cop sorry that’s all there is to it man

Suga- Suga has multiple charges of 1st-degree murder against him but they can’t seem to find his identity so he continues committing murder and will continue until he gets caught or ends up murdering enough people to be put in a position of power

Asahi- everyone is probably like “Oh Asahi is innocent” NO. He has learned that his slightly scary face will let him get away with a lot, he is buying alcohol illegally because he looks old enough to, and he’s buying so much other shit and just getting away with it

Nishinoya- This man gives fucking pimp vibes I can just see him in the big leopard print fur coat with a pretty girl in his lap and he calls himself big poppa but no one else will

Tanaka- Drug dealer vibes, probably runs an entire fucking drug ring with his sister and not just a Lil weed these mfkas have the hard shit too like you could probably buy meth from them, he’s not using it but it’s good business

Ennoshita, Kinoshita, and Narita- They literally rob a bank they have an entire scheme and get away with multiple bank robberies and this goes on for MONTHS

Kageyama- We know he’s volleyball smart but otherwise he’s so mfing stupid and I love him for it but he is a chronic shoplifter. Just picks something up and takes it, has walked out of a store without paying for an entire bed set once and got away with it somehow so idk props to him

Hinata- He is the little guy in any heist situation, he fits anywhere so he can sneak in and out the best, he gave himself the stupid ass code name tiny giant but everyone goes with it because somehow he is the best

Tsukishima- armed robbery, but he doesn’t have a gun just a knife like he’s tall and as an attitude, a knife will get him whatever he needs he doesn’t need the gun

Yamaguchi- He runs a catfishing scheme where he pretends to be a naive girl, scams old men out of their money, and then ghosts them and I think it’s what he deserves let him carry on especially because no one would believe it’s him. Also not really like a crime crime but still a crime in a way

Kiyoko- She kills men and I know it, Queen Kiyoko ending the patriarchy one shitty man at a time like she only kills men who deserve it bc some have rights.

Yachi- She’s too anxious to commit an in-person crime so she does a lot of cybercrime, hacking government databases and releasing info to the people, truly the anonymous we deserve

Saeko- She’s running that drug ring with Tanaka, and she loves it because there’s a thrill to it even though yknow she’s dealing literal meth but like its fine plus she loves rocking people’s shit when they get too handsy, which bring me to my next point underground MMA Saeko, like the illegal one with no rules yeah <3

Ukai- this man probably sells all kinda shit to minors that he shouldn’t he is so unbothered a 7-year-old could probably walk in ask for a pack of camels and get them and leave before he noticed what was going on.

Takeda- Did y’all see how scared Hinata was when Takeda gave him that lecture? This dude could kidnap someone and scare them into giving all the information he needed, a legend truly

Aoba Johsai

Oikawa- took steroids one time. And of course in sports, that’s not allowed. But he only did it once and regretted it for months afterward. Never told anyone and was just relieved he didn’t have to piss in a cup and have someone find out.

Matsukawa- Without hesitation, I know this man takes dead people’s bones and sells them on the internet. Has dubbed himself the bone man and he feels so much power when someone buys a femur or sumn. It’s kinda funny honestly he has a hoard of bones to sell, his fave is the pelvis.

Hanamaki- He’s in between jobs because he stole money from his last job, like he said he was sorry he just needed a little extra for gas but was sad to find out that’s a literal crime and he was laundering money.

Iwaizumi- he’s a street racer, like the fast and furious style and it’s so sexy of him like late-night races ugh to be in an expensive fast car with him where he has one hand on my thigh okay that’s enough of that.

Kunimi- Look me in the eye and tell me he does not do drugs. He does and if you don’t believe me you are wrong and I will fight you on this one.

Kyotani- If there is a crime he will commit it for fun. Like he will do it with no hesitation. He has a record longer than twilight and I’m not sure how he is not in prison actually nvm he escaped and is a wanted criminal lol

Shiritorizawa

Ushijima- Assault, he just reeks of getting into bar fights when he’s absolutely wasted. Like he most likely didn’t start it but he will be finishing it

Tendou- grave robbing, he just goes into the cemetery picked the oldest plots, and gets to digging. Has made thousands on dead people jewelry and probably won’t get caught, like besides the groundskeeper there’s no security he will never stop.

Semi- he breaks copyright laws on the daily. He’s sampling music in his all the time but he’s doing it so sneakily it’s fine its what deserves stream his band on Spotify right now,

Shirabu- His bangs are criminal enough. No, but he has stolen drugs from the hospital before he just wanted to try the Xanax, and yeah he could just write himself a prescription for it nut like it’s so easy to just go get some and no report it so that’s what he did.

Goshiki- y’all want me to say arson don’t you?? Fine. He commits arson multiple times and kills 7 people with fire before getting arrested and he doesn’t even feel bad so in prison he probably fucking runs a gang he is crazy.

Nekoma

Kuroo- he is a capitalist and class traitor and that’s crime enough I don’t care is he’s attractive or rich, He commits crimes daily by just existing but I still love him anyway.

Kai- Could not commit a crime he just wants to garden and live his life. Jk there’s at minimum one body in that garden let him kill a man he deserves it just let him have one dead body

Yaku- he keyed someone’s car once just because they pissed him off. Was it kuroo? Yes. But that’s fine because he also keyed Lev’s car but blamed lev for keying kuroo’s and Kuroo for keying Lev’s. He just wants to watch the world burn.

Kenma- cyberbullying but man he is mean. Like no bars held we will dig into every insecurity he can and that shit hurts and he doesn’t even feel bad about it he will just be as mean as he can if you’re not careful

Lev- his crime is being tall and dumb also doesn’t understand the economy and prints counterfeit money because why can’t we print more money? The government should get on that.

Inuoka- He released all the animals from a zoo, like snuck in one night and just let them all free, I’m surprised the tiger didn’t eat him but hey the animals are free, there’s still some missing uh oh he’s very proud of himself for it. After the rush, he starts sneaking into shelters and freeing all the dogs and cats

Yamamoto and Fukunaga- Have egged a house before, it was Kuroo’s he deserves all this bullying and you can’t stop me.

Date Tech

Aone- Criminal Conspiracy, sure he had an entire foolproof plan to get away with the perfect crime but someone found out, and now his plans are ruined, damn </3 and no one ever suspects the quiet guy either.

Futakuchi- Having a prostitute, he just wanted some company like mans is lonely so he paid a girl to just spend a Lil time with him it’s all good.

Fukurodani

Bokuto- I know we all haha funny laugh at tax evader bokuto and sure maybe he evades his taxes but he’s also committed vehicular manslaughter, he cannot drive and has killed someone with his car maybe even multiple someones but he always drives off in a panic because he doesn’t know what else to do.

Akaashi- Hasn’t actively committed a crime but has been an accomplice in every vehicular manslaughter Bokuto has committed why the fuck does he keep letting bokuto drive? He really needs to stop that.

Konoha- A master scammer he is so convincing everyone gives him money even if they’re a little sus because he’s just that good each scheme is so convincing.

Inarizaki

Kita- He grows weed, you can’t tell me those rice fields are just for rice he’s got all this space he is growing marijuana and selling it, let him do it I want him to be my plug.

Atsumu- "What is my perfect crime? I break into Tiffany's at midnight. Do I go for the vault? No, I go for the chandelier. It's priceless. As I'm taking it down, a woman catches me. She tells me to stop. It's her father's business. She's Tiffany. I say no. We make love all night. In the morning, the cops come and I escape in one of their uniforms. I tell her to meet me in Mexico, but I go to Canada. I don't trust her. Besides, I like the cold. Thirty years later, I get a postcard. I have a son and he's the chief of police. This is where the story gets interesting. I tell Tiffany to meet me in Paris by the Trocadero. She's been waiting for me all these years. She's never taken another lover. I don't care. I don't show up. I go to Berlin. That's where I stashed the chandelier."

Osamu- resisting arrest. He just said no and ran. Granted he shouldn’t have punched the cop in the first place to have to be arrested but like that’s not the point here.

Aran- accidental child abandonment, like he just forgot he was babysitting and left the kid alone for like a day. He felt terrible but he still forgot the kid and now is fearful of parenthood

Suna- owns an illegal weapon, like he just never registered it and keeps it around and would use it if needed Suna please just point the weapon at me maybe

Others

Terushima- Graffiti, he loves painting on the walls of buildings and tagging them, has so much spraypaint and his day isn’t complete if he doesn’t tag at least one building or train car.

Daishou- Public intoxication- he got a little too fucked up and stripped on the street he will forever have to live with everyone knowing he has an ass tattoo like damn bruh

Sakusa- Perjury he simply wanted to get out of court so he said some shit so he could leave granted he lied under oath but whatever, did they ever find out? No, so he’s fine and he’d do it again if it meant he could leave faster. Like sure he was a witness to a murder but bruh he pretends he does not see.

Hoshihumi- driving without a license he simply thought you didn’t need one because why do you need a piece of plastic to say you can drive a car like??? Just know how to drive it.

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ssamie · 4 years ago

Text

five. similar routines

oikawa tooru x fem langa!reader

(hq x sk8 the infinity)

warnings: spelling mistakes, swearing, 2k+ words, u have langa’s blue hair sorry

gen masterlist. “snow” masterlist.

"you know, oikawa-san.." she started off with a sheepish hum "yes?" oikawa hummed with a smile

"i thought you were only picking me up so we can walk together." she said

"exactly. that's why im here" oikawa said with a chuckle

"so.. why are you in my room so early in the morning?" she deadpanned as she looked at him, as he sat on the foot of her bed "you're here way too early, oikawa-san" she said with a yawn

"well, i thought i'd get to know your mom too since she's also new to the neighbourhood ya know? shes very nice, by the way." oikawa chuckled out

"my.. mom..?" she sent him a weirded out look

"hey! not like that!" oikawa shrieked out "if anything, you'd be the only girl i'd have eyes for, FYI" he said with a wink. "oh.." y/n said with a laugh. "well, it's whatever oikawa-san." she said as she stood up from her bed.

"did you eat breakfast yet? i feel like you have since you're already dressed up and all.."

"but if you haven't, you can eat with me." she offered as she looked at him expectantly by the door

"i ate already, but we can have coffee together" oikawa suggested with a smile as he followed her out "oh. but you'd have to make it since i suck at making coffee." she said "oh come on, you can't be that bad" oikawa mused as he ruffled her already messy blue locks

"i'll drink whatever you make, don't worry" he said

"okay but i warned you." she replied with a sigh

oikawa sent one last fleeting glance to her room before he closed the door. he took note of the snowboards displayed by her wall and her skateboard so delicately situated by her desk. as well as the slightly messy collage of pictures stuck to her wall, most of them being pictures of a redhead.

"oikawa-san?" she called out, looking back to see him lagging behind.

"oh sorry, i'll be right there, y/n-chan!"

"this is coffee is probably more bitter than a rotten ballsack." oikawa muttered to himself as he reluctantly gulped down the beverage.

"did you say something, oikawa-san?" y/n hummed with a smile

"i said this coffee is probably better than any drink there is!" he exclaimed

"really??" y/n asked with sparkling eyes "then i'll make you coffee every morning starting now!" she said with an excited smile

oikawa paled as he watched her relish in the compliment with a smile, it's almost as if she was oozing with sparkles."ah.. y-you don't have to.." oikawa stammered out with a quivering smile

"oh.." her smile fell

oikawa mentally gasped and hastily shook his head "no, i take that back!" he exclaimed "you can make me coffee! in fact, you can make me a gallon everyday if you want!" oikawa rambled with in a frantic tone

"okay, oikawa-san" she smiled "that would mean we'd meet every morning too, haha" she chuckled

oikawa froze at the statement and nodded with an accomplished smile. "yup. sounds good!" he said. he then turned away and dramatically cried a single tear. "so worth it.." he muttered as he sipped on the devil spawn of a drink.

"anyways, should we go?" she asked him. "i can leave my board if you want me to walk with you." she said "no it's fine, i'll just keep up" he said

oikawa hummed to himself as he envisioned the two of them making their way to school. y/n was skating while he holds her hand, the both of them laughing and smiling like two protagonists of a shoujo manga.

"let's go, oikawa-san" she called out to him as she puts on her converse instead of her school shoes and grabbed her board.

"right." oikawa hummed as he happily followed behind, watching her get on the board and placing her phone in her pocket. "you'd keep up with me right?" she asks him "i won't go too fast if you want.."

"no, no. go do your thing, i don't mind~" oikawa cooed with a smile

"okay then." she sent him a smile before fully skating away and leaving a trail of dust behind.

"eh?" oikawa blinked in confusion as he watched her skate in a baffling speed and jumping effortlessly over bumps and obstacles. it was so different from what he's seen the first time he saw her skating to school. he was almost certain she was just one of those mediocre skater girls that everyone likes solely because they're pretty.

"oikawa-san, why aren't you following?!" she yelled from atleast a block away

"huh? well i didn't think you'd leave me behind like that!" oikawa whined as he ran towards her with a huff "you said to do my thing!" she yelled back

"right, right, my bad!" he laughed it off as he patted her back "i'll slow down if you want" she offered with a laugh

"yeah, i'd love that.."

from his front porch, iwaizumi watched them with an unamused look on his face. "flirting already?" he groaned "its seven in the morning, when will i ever get a break from this?"

"wow, didn't think you two would get so close so quickly" hanamaki teased as he pointed to y/n who was fixing the nets

"um can someone help me put this up-"

"oh that? it was pretty easy" oikawa shrugged it off with a smug grin "she just couldn't resist me and my charms, ya know?"

"i'll do it for you, don't worry!" oikawa cut her off as he skipped towards her and proceeded to put the nets up himself

hanamaki sweat dropped as he watched the brunette continue to chat her up while she simply nods along "more like you couldn't resist her.." he sneered. matsukawa joined in as they three in teasing comments to the captain, all while oikawa tries to shut them up.

"hey, let's eat out after practice, y/n-san" yahaba suggested with a flirty smile

"oh, sure.." y/n replied, tilting her head in confusion as his face contorts into one that resembles the handsome squidward. "cool. i'll come." oikawa interjected as he stared yahaba down.

"oh uh- i meant me.. and her.." yahaba sweat dropped

"yknow what, why don't we bring the whole team!" oikawa let out an obnoxiously fake laugh as he announced the plans to the whole gym. "geez. he's down bad" matsukawa said to hanamaki as the latter nodded along

"jesus christ, that dumbass.." iwaizumi sighs as he watched oikawa subtly give yahaba more tasks than the others

"are you free later iwaizumi-san?" y/n asks him as she hesitantly tugged on his sleeve. iwaizumi raised a brow and nodded. "yeah, why? did you need something?" he asked

"i know i said i'll stop trying but i still wanna know how to play volleyball" she said "can you teach me? coach said you're the ace"

"oh sure" iwaizumi gave her a thumbs up "but didn't shittykawa teach you already?"

"it didn't really work" she frowned "maybe you'd be a better teacher". iwaizumi sweat dropped as he heard a dramatic gasp followed by a thud from afar. he didn't even need to turn around to know that it was oikawa.

"sure, i'll teach you the basics" iwaizumi sent her a grin. "thank you!" she exclaimed happily before walking off and doing her work

"iwa-chan, you traitor!" oikawa exclaimed as he tried to tackle him down, only to be blocked by iwaizumi's arm. "shut up. its not my fault you can't even teach her how to hit a damn ball" iwaizumi rolled his eyes

"i can, okay! it's just her..." oikawa chuckled sheepishly "she doesn't know how to hit it properly"

"huh." iwaizumi hummed "maybe she's right, maybe you're just a shitty teacher."

"you'll see for yourself!"

"i can finally play volleyball!" she announced excitedly as she munched down on her food "really? how'd you learn that?" kindaichi mused with a soft laugh

"iwaizumi-san taught me! he's really good" she said with sparkling eyes

oikawa spluttered as he felt an imaginary arrow pierce his chest. "ah.. that's.. that's great y/n.. good job" he squeaked out with a quivering smile. "maybe you're right.. maybe i was just a shitty teacher" oikawa shamefully admitted to iwaizumi

beside her, oikawa silently sulked as he gloomily nibbled on his burger. "oikawa-san, i can finally serve too" she told him with a smile

"glad you're aware" iwaizumi snickered. "anyways, i'm gonna go ahead" iwaizumi said as he stood up and stretched. "i have a shit ton of work to do so i'll leave ya guys to it"

"iwaizumi-san, won't you walk with us?" y/n asked him "we're neighbours too right?"

"ah actually, sure-" iwaizumi cut himself off as he caught a glimpse of oikawa looming over her shoulder

the brunette was giving him an exaggerated frown, paired with his 'puppy dog eyes' and even some tears for the effect. its not that iwaizumi was swayed by the expression. frankly, he just didn't want to look at it any longer so he denied.

"actually.. you guys can walk together. i think my mom needs me now. stay safe though" he said. y/n nodded and waved him off while oikawa send him a grateful smile and a wave. iwaizumi simply flipped him off and waved the rest goodbye.

"so, anything else you want, y/n-chan?" oikawa cooed as he watched her chomp down her meal

"milkshake.." y/n muttered with a delighted look on her face. "milkshake it is!" oikawa exclaimed. he then turned to yahaba who was grumbling by the corner and grinned.

"cmon then, yahaba-kun~ she said she wanted a milkshake! chop chop!" oikawa chuckled. yahaba rolled his eyes but pulled out his wallet anyways. "why am i getting treated like this?" he silently sulked

"well you were the one who invited us after all" oikawa mused. "i invited y/n, not all of you!" yahaba whined

by the side, hanamaki and matsukawa simply watched, sneering and laughing to themselves while they ate. "this is gonna be a long night" hanamaki let out a sigh "who cares? yahaba's treating us" matsukawa shrugged

"i never said that!" yahaba shrieked out

"how do you feel?" oikawa asked her. "full.." she replied with a satisfied sigh "thanks for inviting me, everyone" she said

"no problem, y/n-senpai!" kindaichi replied as he and kunimi waved her goodbye "bye guys!" the rest of them said as the team dispersed to their own routes.

"guess its just us now" oikawa mused as he stuffed his hands in his jacket pockets. "right." y/n nodded as she slowly skated beside him

"sure, oikawa-san. i'd like that" she smiled

"let's walk together tomorrow too" oikawa suggested. "i'll invite iwa if you want"

"this'll be like our routine from now on" oikawa cheered "us three will be best friends in no time" he sent her a wink

"best friends.." she muttered "i already-"

"-have a best friend, i know" oikawa finished her sentence with a laugh "it's fine to have more than one best friend, ya know?" he mused

"more than one.." she hummed thoughtfully "someone other than reki..?" she muttered to herself

she looked down at her feet and her board, then back at oikawa and the slightly starry sky. it was quite similar to the daily routine she has with reki. skating together to school, eating out, and skating back home. it provided her a strange sense of deja vu.

"that sounds nice." she said with a smile

oikawa smiled back and put his hands behind his head as he walked. "yeah it does." he agreed

"i look forward to being best friends with you guys" she said

sorry for the spelling / grammar mistakes if there are any :<

"me too, y/n."

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wolfywolfy · 4 years ago

Note

hi! may i request some headcanons about julian's favorite hobbies? either when he was growing up or now

Ooooh I love this idea. I'll see what I can come up with!! (Sorry this got pretty long)

We know when he was younger he was always intrigued by tourists in Nevivon. I think maybe seeing so many people from different walks of life might have inspired him to be interested in acting and theatre. Maybe he became particularly good at telling tourists stories (usually ones that he heard from other tourists a while ago, but he was better at adding suspense and tension and, yknow, twisting the truth a little bit). Sometimes if he grew a crowd, some of the tourists would leave him small tips in the form of various world currency. He would keep it all in a bag tucked under his bed, and sometimes late at night he would look at the coins and study how they were different.

Also, Portia would LOOOOVEEEE to hear his stories while she was growing up. She would beg and beg and beg for him to tell her a new story every night before bed, and while Julian acted like he didn't like it, he actually loved spending the quality time with his sister. She was sharp as a tack even then though, so he had to come up with new stories fast or she would call him out on being "unoriginal".

Once Julian was able to join Mazelinka on her travels, he became the ship's sort of chore/scrub boy. He would handle anything that had to deal with cleaning or helping the crew out, like throwing out the cook's trash, tying down the masts, and most importantly, swabbing the deck. Julian actually enjoyed that last one a lot though, especially at night, because he could just stop and stare at the sea and take it all in. Being in the middle of the ocean always felt so right to him, maybe it was because of all the possibilities. When Mazelinka told him how to read the stars for navigation, she told him about a constellation that sat right above Nevivon -- he would always check on it those nights and think of Pasha.

While he was a battle medic, the only thing keeping him sane was to read. He would read any book he could get his hands on, and once he read them all he would read them again. There were a few nights where the camp was blissfully peaceful, and that was when he would go outside and stare at the stars and wish he was back in the middle of the ocean.

After adopting Brundle, his old dog, he used to try and play fetch with her. She was never very energetic though, and would just give him a look whenever he threw a stick for her. Eventually Julian gave up, but one day he came up with the idea of hiding treats for her around the house. She was a hound dog, after all, and she could sniff practically anything out. Julian loved to find a new place every day to hide a treat and watching Brundle sniff it out, usually within just a few minutes. He would give her the biggest hugs and pets once she found them!!

Julian writes letters a lot, he just hardly ever sends them. Not only is he the only one who can read his terrible handwriting, but it's more therapudic than anything. He's written the most letters to Portia, where he talked about his daily events, how he was feeling, asked her for advice... But he never sent any of them. He kept them all though, scattered around any desk he ever sat at for an extended period of time.

He loves to play card games at the Rowdy Raven. Everybody there cheats, including him, and it keeps everyone on their toes. Sometimes if he's lucky a fight will break out, and he just loves the chaos. Really gets the blood pumping! Don't worry though, he dips out before it gets too awful rowdy... much to his opponents chagrin. Julian is very slippery and somehow knows just how to sneak away when things start to get crazy.

Used to, when he, Nadia, and Asra were closer, Nadia would invite the two of them to afternoon tea. Julian would joke about it at first, but he actually loves the tiny teacups and saucers and figuring out where they came from, telling stories if he had ever been to their place of origin before, and just having a nice casual time with his friends. Plus he thinks tiny sandwiches are adorable.

Obviously he is a theatre nerd. He volunteers every once in a while at the community theater in South End, and auditions whenever he has the spare time. He doesn't ever expect to actually get a part, but whenever he does he gets super excited and motivated to be the best he can be. He loves performing and being loved by the audience, and he's sincerely touched whenever anyone he knows comes by to support him and the rest of the cast. Whenever he is in a show, he'll spend hours each night reading the script and deliberating on how certain lines should be delivered. He'll write notes to ask at the next rehearsal, like "what's my motivation when I'm talking to [xyz character]? Should I say this quietly to myself or should I project it to the audience?" etc etc etc. It's quite charming to see him so passionate.

After the events of the main story are over, he picks up reading again. He'll read practically anything, doesn't matter what. He still has insomnia sometimes and reading helps distract him from himself. He especially loves it if his significant other will brew some hot coffee for them to drink while they just spend time curled up together, his nose buried in a book. He won't admit it, but his favorite genre is those steamy romance books with the painted muscle men on the covers. Does he have reading glasses?? Yes. Does he look adorable in them??? Double yes.

Whenever he's at home, he ends up humming a lot of tunes to himself whenever it's quiet. If he realizes that his significant other is there, he'll break out into song and pull them into it. Sometimes it's old sea shanties he remembers from his time on Mazelinka's ship, sometimes it's folk songs the soldiers used to sing on the battlefield, sometimes it's just some pretty tune he heard however long ago. Around friends he acts as if his singing is terrible to get some laughs, but his voice is actually quite lovely and measured, he just only shares it with the person he cares for the most. If the song is more lively he'll pull them in for a dance around their home, spinning and spinning through each room... It's one of his favorite things.

Eventually he gets into writing and developing his own plays. It turns into a deep passion, where he longs to tell the stories he always told as a child to a greater audience. He feels like to some extent it's his purpose to be a storyteller, and his friends & family agree. He was always good at it, and playwriting is no exception. I'd like to think he becomes rather famous for it

Man absolutely does needlepoint and sometimes it looks awful but he's surprisingly adept at using the needle (he is a doctor / surgeon after all). Would love to teach you how to do it sometime.

#julian devorak #the arcana #the arcana game #arcana #headcanons #headcanon #also: sex #does that count as a hobby??#does now #anyways i just love the idea of jukian having a BUNCH of hobbies because he just loves to do so many things #sorry this got so long i just had ✨ideas✨#might add more one day if i can think of them #wolfy speaks

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wychive · 4 years ago

Text

𝙪𝙣𝙨𝙥𝙤𝙠𝙚𝙣 𝙬𝙤𝙧𝙙𝙨

summary // you found your pile of ‘letters’ to hyunjin that contain thoughts that have never been said and decided to write to him one last time.

pairing(s) // hyunjin x gn!reader, hyunjin x oc, slight minho x reader

genre(s) // angst, letter fic

warning(s) // mentions of food, themes of being forgotten, vulgar wording, humiliation, overthinking

word count // 2.0k

author's note // happy birthday @noya-sannnn !! im sorry this was so late hhh you know how i am irl,, but i hope you enjoy this! i love you so much, jane <3 i apologize for the many grammar mistakes gn. i recommend listening to iu’s ending scene while reading this! btw y/n/n means your nickname.

[10/01/14, 3:55am]

dear jinnie,

hi there! it's y/n <3 i hope you're doing okay - i mean of course you are pfft anyways, just writing this short letter (more like paragraph) sort of as a venting mechanism? for things i cant tell you about lol im not so sure how you would call it, since you're so much better at words than i am. basically were like:

hyunjin: ow a brain freeze!

me: haha brain go brrrr

anyways haha yea <3 it's 4am so like,, ill see you at school!

signed,

your loser,

y/n/n

[15/02/14, 12:34am]

yo heartthrob!

im back with this kinda stuff haha it's been a whole? week? since ive written one of these so like yes..hi! i just wanted to say thanks, for today. you really know how to cheer me up huh? you really outdid yourself by setting up that little picnic for us. congrats on making the strawberry cake so perfectly <3 this day will always stay as a core memory in the back of my brain. you're too caring sometimes,,, istg you'll pay for this [maybe hugs?] >:)

signed,

your partner in crime,

y/n/n

[30/02/15, 01:29am]

jinnie-senpai~~

LMAO you hate me calling you that, doesn't change a thing though. hehe,, nways i hope you enjoyed your birthday present :) i got you that really cool skateboard that you wanted. i worked my ass off for that in my mother's garden so like,, you gotta thank me for that a thousand times :D nah jk, its a sincere gift, from me to you. i rarely do this for ANYONE so consider yourself lucky to have a best friend like me -3- also, seungmin is like….kinda the cutest person ever. introduce me to him pls, thank!

signed,

<your bestest friend3,

y/n

(p.s. you're kinda cute too,,,, ig,,, still stinkee tho)

[13/04/15, 9:04pm]

hey 'baby' (HAHAHA ihy for this)

i hope your day was okay! i didn't see much of you today (which was sort of a bummer but wtv) so like…. uh yea. you told me you were doing okay over text, which kinda surprised me because like?? we always video call lol this is kinda the first time,, but its okay, i trust you! (i really hope youre doing alright tho, i'll beat anyone up if they make you sad >:( ) you also called me 'sweetheart' today which was like…. omg wtf haha????????? that was so weird to me for some reason… a good kind of weird :D we haven't done those kinds of nicknames in a while so…. happy to know that they're back in session <3 i talked to the new girl today, she's really cool! like she knows the bean song on tiktok so like its a total win heh, ill introduce you to her tomorrow! you'll love her a lot

signed,

your 'lover',

y/n/n

[08/06/16, 10:23pm]

hey howl (hehe go back to that movie night we had)

this spring break sucks so much,, esp because youre not here (you still couldve brought me along :'[ ) but wtv i hope youre enjoying yourself. ive been hanging out with yeonnie lately and i found out she likes conan grey too like pls i love her sm. can we adopt her?? please???? she told me you guys have been video calling too and that makes me so happy!! you two are getting along so well aaa my precious babies </3

what if you developed a crush on her? haha…..jk unless?? (no jk dont shes all mine, stay away >:) ) anyways, i hope the three of us hang out soon. maybe go to that ice cream parlour where they serve the best cookies and cream?

signed,

your daisy,

y/n/n

[19/07/15, 01:23am]

peepee poopoo hello

heyheyhey!! (heh, haikyuu thingz) i hope youre doing okay! i mean sure you are, with everything going so well. also i feel like you're not telling me something. maybe it's just me? is it? i hope it is because you tell me everything,, we've been talking less these days but its okay! i know how busy you are, especially with your dad always bugging you,,

also, i think yeonbin likes you :0,, she keeps talking about you whenever we hang out. don't get me wrong, its not bad that she likes you but...something doesn't feel right. i feel like i'm being the third wheeler here and like ugh idk. haha laughs yea i think its just me.. im sorry, i didnt mean to do you like this,, anyways, ill see you soon + her too ofc- yall are inseparable lmao

signed,

your moonlight,

y/n/n

[23/07/15, 01:56am]

greetings, kind sir

lol more like mean sir but like aight KSKSK,, anyways,, how have you been? we haven't really talked in a while,, our convos are always so short with it being one-sided :/ i wish you were online more. yeonnie is ignoring me,, do you know why? i think you do,,, but when i asked you just said you didnt know. did i do something wrong? pls tell me..

she blocked my contact the other day and she won't even smile at me when i pass her in the hallways. its,, sad and stressful especially because she was the only one that would genuinely talk to me. i hate to say this,, but i miss you. us, hanging out like the best trio we are, yknow? but i dont think you miss me the same way. sorry, im getting out of hand. i know im just overreacting. im just gonna sleep ig,, good night! sweet dreams,,

signed,

your pink lemonade,

y/n/n

[25/07/15, 03:25am]

hi there

i heard you and her got together?? congrats, jinnie! im so proud of you,, especially because you never had even considered getting a girlfriend a few months earlier lmaO you really woo the ladies huh? anyways,, i hope you've been well since we last talked,, how many days has it been?? i would say nearly a week or so but honestly it feels like a hundred years,, considering you and i used to talk every day. but you have her now to keep you company.

keep this a secret but can you possibly tell me why it hurts when i see her? or when i mention her or even think of her?? is it because she's connected to you? but.. you're my best friend, so why? is it because i miss you? is it because im alone now? is it because you left me with a simple 'i have to go now,, bye y/n/n.'? im not sure either. im being silly, i apologize. ill figure it out sooner or later. sweet dreams, jinnie

signed,

your asswipe,

y/n

[25/07/15, 04:30am]

jinnie

it's because i love you.

signed,

your butterfly,

y/n

[??/08/??, 05:??am]

you

i miss your lame jokes. i miss your smile. i miss your laughs. i miss your funny faces. i miss the way your eyes twinkle. i miss th way you would make me happy just by doing the bare minimum. i miss the disaster you made when cooking breakfast. i miss the night when you snuck me out just to go to that pretty lantern event. i miss when you would call out my name everytime we met. i miss when we would share earbuds in train rides. dont you get it, hyunjin? i miss you.

[??/??/15, ??:??am]

asshole.

please tell me that isn't true, please. you're too kind to do these kinds of things, right? + i was your best friend,, then, why, why did you hurt me like this. i didnt do anything wrong.. you couldve just told me you didnt like me,,, why did she have to tell me? out of all people.

youre so pathetic for this,, i thought you were brave, bold - but youre just a fucking coward. i loved you, i really did. and i realised too late… im sorry. she,, i shouldn't have talked to her in the first place, right? i bet you knew she humiliated me, in front of everyone. of course you did, you were the only one that knew. you told her. fuck, i hate you so much (yet why do i long for you on a night like this?). you know how much that'll affect me and yet, there you are, laughing about it with her.

signed,

fuck off,

you know who i am.

[31/08/15, 03:41am]

ah, jinnie

please tell me this is just a nightmare. please, please. stop just reading my texts, please answer them. jinnie. i miss you so much. i dont care bout her, please just let me be in your arms. i dont care if you love me back, please just talk to me at least. tell me what i did wrong,, jinnie,, please,,, clear these tear stains on my cheek with kisses.

signed,

your fuck-up,

y/n

[15/09/15, 04:59am]

jinnie

why do i keep crying because of you? its been a few weeks since everything has happened. please, nothing has changed. i still love you the same even with all the hatred i have pent up in this stupid brain of mine. i wish i could just walk back in time, to where it all began.

when i first met you in third grade and you pushed me while playing soccer or maybe when we took those ridiculous prom pictures, remember those? i hope you still have them,, because i do too. i hope the pictures of us on your wall still hang there,, it'll remind you of the happy times. hm,, maybe you don't need them.

you already have millions of pictures with you and her,, i bet you printed some and replaced those with ours right? sly dog.

signed,

friend,

y/n/n

[04/02/16, 12:57am]

hey

i went to the park today and saw both of you being happy. it's nice to see your smile again. im sorry i didnt go up to you,, i just thought it would be awkward. when i heard that adorable laugh of yours, it made me realise that i lost something special. but it's okay isnt it? as your happiness matters more than mine.

signed,

y/n

[06/01/20, 08:00pm]

dear hyunjin,

im doing fine here. how about you? gosh,, how long has it been? years? since we last talked to each other. i havent heard from you since. i would just like to say i still think of you sometimes, when watering the plants or dancing while making pancakes. sometimes i think you're here with me too, just being the pals we were.

sometimes i'd see you out, just reading a book in the park or buying pasta sauce at the grocery store. it's nice to see you having a stable life. im not sure if you're still with her or not, but its good to know that you still have that large friend group. also! you're never gonna guess who im dating--

it's minho! do you remember him? the one that i used to hate,, uh yeah. he asked me out the other day- you may wonder how tf,,, i too do not know how tf but he gives the best hugs ever. he gave me the love i wanted from you. he stitched my heart back together after it broke,, i love him so much, jinnie..

it's snowing,, do you remember when we would skate on the frozen lake in front of your house? are your parents well? i wonder if your mother still has those earrings i bought for her birthday. i never told you this but your laugh and hers sound so similar.

i would just like to say thank you, for everything. you were a big part of my life, up until now. when we see each other after this, we would just be strangers. maybe flash a little smile or give a little wave whenever we greet each other but nothing more. some memories of us would flow in every now and then but it'll just be a short teaser. well, i'll be going now. smile for me, okay?

signed,

the one that loved you the most,

y/n.

taglist // @/noya-sannnn, @crvgio , @neo-shitty

reply to be in my gen taglist!

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bthump · 4 years ago

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Ok so this is me, yknow on anon as promised bringing you something fun to answer fingers crossed! What's your take on possible future hill of swords moments? I feel like since then so much has changed storywise but if we're real neither guts nor griff really resolved anything about their feelings for eachother OR moved on so if they met again (by chance or by choice) what do you think would go down? A repeat of the last time or something brand new given guts' sort-of-development at elfheim?

ooh interesting question, ty!

tbh if I’m being genuinely speculative then I think that their next interaction is going to be an immediate fight in which Guts sees Griffith and goes beast of darkness and maybe kills some of the rpg group as collateral damage, based on the scene in Casca’s dreamscape where dog Guts loses it when seeing pterodactyl Femto and nearly destroys the coffin.

But it sounds like their next interaction won’t be their last, so maybe after that we can start getting somewhere with their unresolved emotions. I don’t have any real concrete ideas for this though. Basically I think Guts and Griffith are both avoiding confronting their lingering feelings in what could legit be a deliberate parallel to the year between Guts leaving and the Eclipse back in the Golden Age, and I want closure this time.

Well, again being genuinely speculative, I think we won’t get that closure til the actual climax of the story, but we will get it. So this basically comes back to how I think Berserk will end lol, which is Guts and Griffith getting a moment of emotional connection right before one or preferrably both dies, acknowledging each other as their true lights in the surrounding darkness, a la Ganishka’s final scene (or even the King’s death to go further back), and finding fulfillment in killing each other/dying together.

The dream is for this to happen in a slow-paced 3rd duel type scene where they have lots of time and space to talk, rather than an action-packed fight w/ Guts in beast of darkness mode and Griffith leveled up into Femto or w/e.

To be more detailed, and to feel more like a call-back to Hill of Swords, I think Griffith should be the first to get the ball of emotional truth rolling by admitting he was wrong then and he isn’t free of his feelings after all. Guts gets fucked up about it and says a lot of angry stuff that boils down to ‘I was pretty much in love with you back in the day and I’m still not over it and I’m mad about that,” Guts lashes out first and Griff is on the defensive and both are kind of reeling from this exchange and neither actually wants to kill the other.

(Those are the necessary revelations specifically imo, that Griffith isn’t emotionless after all and his heart is still bthumping for Guts, and that Guts loved Griffith the whole time and never saw Griff as a monster pre-Eclipse, because those are their specific misunderstandings about each other right now.)

I think at this point I’ve settled on the two of them falling from a height as a parallel to Griffith catching Guts on the hand at the start of the Eclipse, but Guts drags Griffith down with him this time and Griff lets him, as my ideal griffguts death, but I’d accept plenty of others too as long as the catharsis is there.

Also this is assuming fetus/moonbaby is neutralized and out of the picture by then of course, but tbqh all my hopeful speculation assumes that lol.

Ooh and another possibility is that Griffith learns Guts never hated him pre Eclipse but Guts doesn’t learn that Griffith still has feelings, which would be kind of a reverse of their state of understanding pre-Eclipse (in which Griffith believed Guts left him to get away from him and Guts realized Griffith loved him). Maybe that would fit better with a potential non-climactic confrontation in which like, Guts goes beast of darkness and Griffith takes off again. NGriff is so placid that Miura just continuing to write him nearly the same way he has been would work imo, it would leave the reader to fill in the blanks of how he’s feeling but we’d know by that point that he IS feeling, which could be cool.

Then Guts would learn his side of things at the climax, and they’d die together in an emotionally satisfying way, and it would be good.

lmk if you (or anyone else) have any ideas for another hill of swords style scene!

#Anonymous #ask #theme: speculation #headcanons #ship: griffguts #theme: true light #theme: ending #character thoughts

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wherearemyglassesbro · 5 years ago

Text

Alternative careers for the Allies:

I see a lot of the same careers picked for them (baker, librarian, etc) so I’m gonna go out on a limb, maybe even into...OOC territory :0 we will see where this journey leads us

Alfred: A surfing instructor! Alfred is kind and adventurous and though he can be silly he is also strong. He values the saftey of his students very much!! He’s excited to show them the wonders of surfong and just how fun it is to be out on the waves! He is always so proud of them when they surf their first big wave on their own! He’s whooping and hollering and cheering them on from the beach :D He drives a bright blue jeep and when his students see him out and about they all honk at him and he thinks it’s hilarious :D He’s a guest judge at a lot of small surf competitions and he’s also a fantastic announcer too!! He just!! Loves surfing! Seeing kids love it too makes him beyond happy!

Ivan: Ivan is a tv host with his own renovation show stationed in Hawaii. He takes small, run down homes and turns them into livable spaces with a tropical feel. Ivan built up his reputation bakc home in Russia and moved to the US. From there he signed deals with tv companies and bam! He got a show. He has always wanted to live on a warm island somewhere and now he gets to share his passion for renovation with thousands of viewers! He offers tips for DIYs throughout his show and he does his best to bring Hawaiian culture into the homes he builds/fixes. He incorporates all sorts of environmentally friendly fixtures and nature inspired patterns all over! And the best part? He’s there to walk families through the space and shake their hands when they buy it! Even though Ivan is huge and intimidating, in his show he’s seen in khaki shorts, Hawaiian shirts, sandals and socks most of the time. Also, can’t forget a constant sunburn and an intense tan line from his watch on his wrist lmao

Francis: A ballet teacher! Fran is kind but he can be harsh with his words on occasion. He never wants to make his dancers feel terrible about themselves the way other instructors do but when he’s frustrated he may sling around insults “Are you in kindergarten? Because only kindergarteners would point their foot like that! It’s pathetic! I’ve taught you better in the past six years, havent I?” When he teaches, he doesn’t just stand to the side and yell, he performs the motions and stretches with his students! If they’re gonna put this much work into his class then he should too. His students are very aware of his expectations and when they meet those expectations he showers them with compliments! He’s so proud of his dancers, each and every one. They can all easily see his smiling face in the crowd when they’re on stage! And he visits his graduated students when they’re on bigger stages :’)

Yao: Interior designer :0 Yao has extravagant tastes! I can see him as an interior designer for the rich $$$ He keeps what they like in mind and he’ll carefully pick out each and every piece of furniture based on his clients personalities and favorite colors. If they have a pet he’ll add special touches like a gold bird perch or a suede dog bed ;) While he makes sure everything is nice, he’ll pick certain expensive things on purpose just cause! Its his job but sometimes, watching rich people blow their money on silly things is funny to him. His own home is furnished nicely but not too crazy. His pride and joy is his livingroom where his fish tank is :) When a client has a fish tank??? He won’t shut up about it and he’ll make extra sure to emphasize that fish tank! He’ll put good accents in there (safe for the fish of course) and bling out the walls around the fish tank to make other people look at it! He just...loves fish a lot. He incorporates fish art and imagery into a lot of the homes he works in/on

Arthur: uh oh...Artie. Art is naturally sarcastic so what could be a better job for him than a food critic? He couldn’t cook a chicken tender to save his life but he has a great palette. He’ll pick apart dishes and leave scathing reviews and people listen!! Cause he’s persuasive, he writes very well and he articulates his points perfectly. It’s also rather funny when he writes Gordon Ramsay style insults about the food if it’s bad lol. He isn’t just mean though, before he leaves any restaurant he offers genuine advice. He’ll help the owners and cooks figure out what went wrong and how they can do better in the future! He’s a jerk but he isn’t totally evil! He wants to see restraunts succeed!!! He often revisits places he hated just so he can see if they improved!

Matthew: Mattie...is a shoe maker! Not just any kind of shoes, oh no!! He makes high quality hiking boots and other kinds of work boots. He’s a working man and he sees the importance of having food footwear to keep you going throughout the day. His boots are all waterproof, thick soled, warm interior, and many have metal inserts in the toes. If you’re working with machinery, metal toed shoes may just save your toes one day and Matt gets that! He’s made a ton of money off of his boots! All of that money’s going into his big ol’ cabin where he hopes that one day he’ll get to raise a family in :’) He’s in commercials for his boots too so people recognize him...which is a little embarrassing. He’s lowkey rich but he wants to live like a normal guy yknow? He doesn’t think he’s anything special, he’s just a guy who makes affordable boots for workers. Please don’t take pictures...Look away!! He’s just getting groceries like a normal guy! Nothing to see here! Just normal guy business!!

#aph #hetalia #headcanons #aph france #aph england #aph america #aph canada #aph china #aph russia #aph allies #hetalia headcanons #hetalia writing #ask away #ask away!#always up for hc requests

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shihozaki · 4 years ago

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Hi, love!!! I was wondering if I could get a male haikyuu matchup? I’m a Gemini, enfp and a ravenclaw. I’m super outgoing, friendly and I love making new friends! I’m also overly dramatic, loud, sarcastic, spontaneous and immature at times too. I laugh a lot and cry a lot(kind of a paradox I know) and also have the habit to laugh when I’m crying so the people around me don’t feel bad about me crying? It’s weird I know? Anywaysssss my hobbies are baking, playing volleyball, reading fantasy novels, doing makeup on myself or others and sleeping!!!! My favourite color is teal, it just relaxes me and calms me and is just super nice to look at yknow? I also have super irrational fears of being abandoned, not liked by my friends and heights(despite loving roller coasters??). I find confidence, intellect and a similar childish humour to mine super sexy in potential partners. I also love cats, will literally try to pet every single cat I see, be it on the road or under a car, I WILL try to pet it. I’m also currently studying to become a doctor because I love bio and chem(mostly because they’re my best subjects) and Im a bit of a nerd. So for my appearence, I’m 5’4, have an hourglass figure and am pretty busty. I have very long wavy, black hair till my butt with round, brown eyes. I have soft features and I get told my smile(the one with teeth) is pretty and warm. I’m sorry for the rant but I hope this is enough!! And also tysm if you do this, muahhh 💕

Thank you for requesting! I also love fantasy novels :)

I pair you up with Yuji Terushima!

- Terushima approached you first, asking for your number. He didn’t expect to get it in first try but he was ecstatic that he did.

- First date went super well, you guys went to a cafe and then ended up doing makeup on each other for fun. He immediately asked you to become his girlfriend.

- He can’t bake AT ALL, he once tried to help you but it ended in a flour fight (where you guys just threw flour at each other, which btw, is super fun, you should actually try it sometime). But he loves eating your food :)

- He WILL brag about his girlfriend to EVERYONE.

- You guys both really love cats, and you guys even went to a cat cafe once for a date.

- Texts you everyday! He uses lots of memes to communicate

- He’s lowkey smart, but he often tries to have fun instead of thinking things out. You guys both get into fun troubles, but its all worth it at the end since you get a ligah out of it :)

- He’s the biggest cheerleader? Like he will hype you up no matter what you do? Like you could be putting eyeliner on yourself and he will just compliment you about it.

- You guys are kind of known as the “it” couple at school, since both of you guys are naturally charismatic and good looking.

- His love language is words of affirmation so he will compliment you A LOT. He says the words “good girl” a lot-

- Overall you guys are a mess, but a GOOD mess. You guys hype each other up and bring out the best out of each other. It's never a dull day with both of you, and you can guarantee that Yuji is looking at rings even though you guys are in high school.

Scenario: You guys are at a cat cafe!

“THIS IS TOO CUTE, I CAN’T BREATHE!” You squealed as you picked up the nearest kitten from a table. Yuji quickly whipped out his phone and started to take pictures of you and the kitten. “I can!t tell what’s cuter, my girlfriend or the cat!” He laughed. You pretended to be wooed, clutching your heart as you giggled. “How do I look in the photo? Do I look good?” You asked, putting the cat down. “You always look good babe.” Terushima kissed the top of your head before guiding you to a table. You guys ordered your drinks and food, and began to play with the cats. “This one’s name is Rufus. Isn’t Rufus a dog’s name?” You wondered. “This one’s name is Joe.” Said Terushima, eyeing you. You simply laughed. Your boyfriend didn’t think you were that stupid, did he? “I am not falling for another Joe mama jokes, I swear-” Terushima groaned. “You’re no fun.” You rolled your eyes. The waitress dropped off your drinks and before leaving, she informed you guys that the cat Rufus and cat Kimmy (AKA “Joe”) were a couple. “So it’s like a double date.” Suggested Yuji, making you burst into laughter. “Aw, that’s so cute. A cat couple!” You stroked Rufus’s back, making the cat purr. “Can cats get married?” Yuji mumbled. You shrugged. “Why not? They just won’t be aware of it, I guess.” “Will we get married?” Questioned Terushima. You laughed. “Yuji-” “What, I’m just asking! I think we should start saving up for our marriage now, and plan everything.” You smiled. Your boyfriend was such a child sometimes, just saying whatever comes into his mind. But that’s what you liked about him. “Alright then, let's start planning, who do you want your best man to be?” Yuji shrugged. “My man Joe.” “Who’s Joe?”

Oh.

Song: Starships by Nicki Minaj

Thank you for requesting, criticism is totally welcome! I hope to see you again :)

#haikyuu fanfiction #haikyuu matchups #haikyuu x reader #haikyuu!!#haikyu x reader #matchup #matchups open #x reader #terushima fic

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bobzora · 3 years ago

Text

official persona 5 character review

i have only played up to the end of the third palace but i won’t be able to play for a few weeks because my sibling has ABANDONED ME (single tear) and we play together. and i’m bored. so HERES MY REVIEW of all the major characters so far. under read more because i do tend to ramble

- mc/joker (bob johnson)

why is my silent video game protagonist a catboy. it’s funny to me how much personality he manages to have despite being. yknow. a blank slate to project on. charisma! the dialogue options when you’re talking to shadows that are like “girl power!” live in my mind. joker is a girlboss to me. feminism win

- ryuji

he’s like one of those very excited big dogs where you’re like “oh good for you buddy! oh yeah buddy!” but you’re also just like man this is a bit much. on one hand he’s a very good guy but on the other hand sometimes i feel a very strong urge to insult him or just be mean to him in general, often for no particular reason. i like him i really do he just has that kind of personality. he’s a bro. his pirate thing is funny i know they’re named after like. historical figures/characters in literature(?) but captain kidd sounds so. it’s funny ok. it’s funny. he’d be a backyardagain. i like how he’s a mamas boy that’s cute. sorry about your leg buddy. he’s very. naive isn’t the right word but something like that. i still want to bully him. his grin looks dumb (endeared)

- morgana

i think it’s funny how big his head is when he’s in his metaverse mascot form he’s like a bobblehead i want him to fall over from the weight. the gags about his puppy crush on ann and his dislike of being called a cat are ANNOYING like sorry about your identity crisis but i really don’t care. he is cute sometimes though it’s not like i hate him but he’s a little annoying! you know! i’m not big on mascot characters in general haha

- ann

i adore ann she is cute and great and she deserves a lot better get this girl a better costume PLEASE. at the start of the game i was already rooting for her hardcore cause everyone was being terrible to her (very common occurrence that happens to like every character i have noticed. Society) and then she had that thing where she was like “let’s have him continue to live so he can suffer more” and i was like HELL YEAH ann is always saying the truth man. other thieves like “yah it wouldn’t be moral to kill them” (tho they’re cool with the mind control lol 🤔) but ann’s like “idc about that lol i just want him to suffer” SO TRUE. so true. i like her pigtails

- yusuke

ngl before i started playing i kind of already knew that i’d like this guy. i didn’t know much about him other than gay little artist but i knew. i was right. i am incredibly fond of this guy. partially because i too am a weirdo artist with parental issues (his persona awakening had me like *vibrates*) but mostly because he is just so funny. look at this guy! look at his stupid little tail! i lost my mind while doing his first confidant event thing he is GREAT. VERY cool. i just really like him. i could sit there and listen to his long impassioned speeches for a long time

- makoto

i was a big fairy tail fan in early middle school (unfortunate) and i play in dub so every time she opens her mouth i can only hear lucy/every other dub character her va has voiced cause there’s lots of them. ok first of all i’m not a big fan of her character archetype. yknow the straight laced student council president type. nothing personal just not my thing yknow! i do sympathize with her Issues of being useful and being used by the adults around her ofc but i’m not like INVESTED invested. tbf i haven’t known her too long. what’s his face mafia guy’s palace didn’t feel as personal as the last couple which probably contributes to that (underwhelming). on the other hand i really like that she has a motorcycle i was like ?! QUEEN and then THAT WAS HER CODENme??? very cool of her. i don’t care about her that much but i do think she is cool. if i were to encounter her irl i would be so intimidated

- akechi

he has not joined the team yet but he obviously will. i have not seen much of him yet but i do have many opinions. i did know he was this games komaeda archetype before playing because of the sheer amount of arguing i can vaguely remember scrolling past about him but even if i didn’t i would’ve instantly been able to tell. he’s fake as hell. i lose it every other sentence whenever he’s on screen WHO IS THIS GUY. “thesis antithesis *pretentious stuff*” “woowwwww you’re so interesting ^-^” “woahh look we happen to have met waiting for the train teehee” (whenever he pops up in those train scenes it feels like a jumpscare) there is a high percentage chance that i will like this guy a lot. there is a precedent for me really liking that sort of character and he is very entertaining. i hope he is just so unhinged. i mean there’s like a 99% chance he’s the ~mysterious guy causing all the accidents~ and also the “heh kid u were betrayed by one of your own” guy. so. he gives me the vibes of one of those really tiny cutesy dogs who are just incredibly aggressive. funny to me how ryuji hates him to an absurd degree like buddy chilll yeah he sucks but wowww. i LOVE that stupid doodle of him on the classroom chalkboard. the anime sparkles. his hair is ugly btw. we met on 6/9 which turns me into a 12 year old. i enjoyed our silly little tv debate

- futaba

i’m 99% sure that’s the name of the girl with the orange hair and glasses? i haven’t met her yet. she does the hackerman typing thing in the opening which is cute. i’m just mentioning her because i think she’s cute. she’s a techie with orange hair so i’ll probably like her

- fluffy brown hair girl

only character in the game art i haven’t mentioned so i kind of have to so it’s fair. she looks kind?? very fluffy. fluttershy is probably her favorite my little pony. she would eat bread

IN CONCLUSION everybody here needs therapy and also i’m mad that i got invested in a game with time / resource management / stealth mechanics :/ . the battle system is very cool. also the menus are the best character they’re SO sexy

#bobtalk #i have other thoughts bc i’m That Guy but have the rambles of someone who isn’t even halfway done with the game #i want to gnaw on something #please ignore the number of times i said “like” this isn’t an english essay ok. ok?

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larryfanficwriter98 · 4 years ago

Text

Chapter Twelve

Fake It Until You Make It Real

**Side note- 1. It’s a long one. 2.Daniel is Hannah’s boyfriend (not sure if I’ve explained that yet). 3. Fizzy (or Félicité) is not in this story, she was a teenager, not an adult so I do not feel comfortable writing her in like I do with the adults. Also because the adults play essential roles in this story while the sisters/siblings do not. I have not decided if mentioning her at all is in my comfort zone and respectful in my personal opinion with my writing so if you would like her to be mentioned briefly let me know, however she will not be a living or recurring character. If she is mentioned it'll be as respectful as possible with Louis obviously mentioning her or something along those lines. I do not want to come across as rude or disrespectful when it comes to her or any other character who is longer with us, but like I said it did not feel right to write her in just for it to not play a key role in the story and be a brief sentence. I try not to make them (siblings and all) key roles in my stories out of respect since theses stories are about Harry and Louis only, but obviously they'll be mentioned every now and again. Again I'm trying to write this as carefully worded as possible so sorry if it doesn't make sense or comes off badly.****

Harry was up early the next morning as he prepared to make enough donut holes for over a dozen people, most of them being kids. He was excited to finally have the house filled with kids and family and glad today would be warmer than yesterday according to every weather app and website he looked at yesterday before falling asleep with the kids in the bed after they had all cuddled up for a movie in his room. Harry was pulled from his thoughts by arms sliding around his waist and a face pressed against his back making him jerk not having heard Louis.

"You okay?"

"Yeah, I just didn't hear you I was a lost in my thoughts." Louis hummed snuggling into his back, Harry didn't need to look at Louis to know his eyes were still closed and that he was wearing one of Harry's sweaters that fell to his thighs, his briefs probably was just peeking out at the ends, "what are you doing up of you're tired?" Harry asked amused.

"You took your body heat with you." Louis mumbled; it was barely audible, but Harry heard him well enough making him grin.

"Sorry." Harry said, "I had to start breakfast."

"What are you making?" Louis asked resting his chin on Harry's shoulders looking over into the fryer, "ooh something deep fried I like it already."

"Powdered sugar donut holes with little plastic spiders on the piles so they look like spider eggs." Harry said excitedly as he showed Harry the picture that was with the recipe in his homemade seasonal recipe book. Louis was silent for a few seconds before he laughed shaking his head.

"You're lucky you're cute Harold." Louis said pressing a kiss to Harry's cheek before he laid his cheek against Harry's back again.

"You're cuddly this morning."

"I'm tired this morning and you're warm."

"Just admit you're cuddly."

"Never." Louis said kissing his shoulder, "Alright what do you need me to do before everyone arrives?" Louis asked stepping away from Harry and grabbing a mug for his morning tea.

"I think we're all ready for visitors but you - oh baby proofing! I bought baby proofing things this week they're in the basement."

"You bought baby proofing stuff?" Louis asked.

"Well, I've never had babies here so yeah I'm about to have two one year old roaming the house. I figured you were the best one to do that stuff since we never really did Hannah and I, I mean."

"You never baby proofed?" Louis asked looking at Harry who shook his head.

"I bought a large pen and we kept Maddie in there during the day except for naps and such but we did tummy time in there and she crawled in there. When she started walking and wanting to roam, we completely sealed off the living room and kept her there. We didn't have a need to baby proof. I mean obviously we made the room was safe and her crib was where it should be and all of that stuff, but we didn't really have a lot of furniture or outlets so." Harry explained shrugging at the end, "obviously if you and I have a baby one day this house will need to be thoroughly baby proofed and we'll probably spend more money on gates than we will on anything else, but our apartment was probably the size of the living rooms combined. It wasn't that big."

"Not even married yet and you're already thinking about trapping me with a little baby. The audacity." Harry grinned looking over at Louis.

"I'd be more worried if I didn't know you have a Winnie the pooh outfit in the basement storage for a baby girl. Still on the store hanger that is at least a year old."

"It was on sale." Louis said sipping his tea as he walked towards the basement door, "at least you have a warning of what the theme of the nursery is going to be. You can pretend you had a say in it now and suggest Winnie the pooh before I have to go behind your back and do it myself."

"You're lucky I approve otherwise we'd argue."

"No, we wouldn't." Harry chuckled as he heard the basement door click behind Louis before it opened again, "oh by the way its seven months old thank you very much. Not a year. I bought it in March. It was last one of its size and it spoke to me Harry. It said buy me and so I bought it."

"Remind me to never let you know where the credit card is." Louis laughed closing the door behind him.

****

Three hours later both of their families were there, and everything was going smoothly. Anne had looked so shocked and heartbroken but excited when she saw Maddison that Louis had almost cried. He knew his mother had to look away to keep from crying as well. After that however everything went smoothly, and Louis could tell his mother was absolutely in love with Harry.

"So is a baby in the near future for you two?" Anne asked as they stood in the kitchen moving the pudding cups onto the decorative trays. Harry was outside with his mother talking about recipes or something that Louis didn't pay much attention to.

"Not so near that I'll be showing at the wedding but yes it's been discussed. We both wanted to wait until he had custody though so we're not dealing with too much. With my mom an hour and a half away and you guys in London, Liam and Niall working most of the days Harry has off, and Zayn being the only real available last-minute option we don't want to deal with a pregnancy during the craziness that is sure to come." Louis explained looking at her briefly.

"Right, I understand that. So sometime in the next or two."

"Yeah, I think so. I hope so at least. I loved being pregnant with Freddie, it wasn't the greatest experience with my partner, but take him away it was great. Harry is such an amazing dad to Maddie, and he is stepping into the role with Freddie so easily. He missed a lot of Maddie with his school and Hannah doing what she did I know he feels more guilty than he lets on about that."

"He loves her to death and Freddie. You can see it when he looks at them. And you, of course. I thought Harry was in love with Hannah but him looking at you doesn't even come close to him looking at her."

Louis blushed, there was that four-letter word again so soon in the real timeline yet so casually being mentioned today. Harry and he have been carefully avoiding that word, they knew it was too soon, or maybe that was their excuse, so they didn't have to say it so soon. He didn't know. What he did know was that he and Harry both had a conversation about that word and that they wouldn't say it until they meant it. If anyone asked, they would say it wasn't something they just casually said or whatever felt right in the moment. So far no one seemed to notice or think anything of it if they had noticed.

"He's great. I'm really lucky to have found someone like him." Louis freely admitted, "even now he just...I don't have words to tell you everything that I want to list." Anne chuckled nodding

"I'm so proud of him I just wish he would relax a little with saving so much. He was such a careful spender always terrified of spending too much and ending up barely making ends meet."

"Really? I've always thought him a little, not careless, but definitely not cautious. He definitely doesn't come off as a rich boy just someone who has enough money to not blink yknow."

"Yeah, he's very humble, I think. Doesn't show off his wealth any more than he does unconsciously. Though a lot of that is from his childhood, I'm sure he's already told you about that, so I won't go too much into it, but it was hard. Especially since I can see how much they remember it now as adults, I always wished they were too young to remember or maybe it'd be pushed as they got happier memories. I overcompensated a lot when they were teenagers."

Louis nodded even though Harry hadn't actually told him anything of his childhood except a brief mentioning that his mom had been a single mother with two kids. Nothing in depth that would explain what his mother was talking about. And looking back that was Louis' fault, Harry always asked about him and Freddie and their lives. Louis was always too happy to tell anyone about Freddie and his baby years, Louis has never asked Harry about anything. By the way Anne was talking it was obviously not something Harry would just casually mention and had to be asked about it to talk about it. The door slid open before either of them could continue talking and Harry walked in with his mom, the kids, and dogs running into the house.

"What are you two talking about?" Harry asked wrapping his arms around Louis' waist from behind resting his chin on Louis' shoulder.

"Just this and that." Anne said with a shrug, "I asked him about grandbabies."

"I asked Harry about grandbabies too." Jay said.

"Our mothers are conspiring against us." Harry whispered just loud enough for the mothers to hear him; Louis chuckled nodding.

"I think so too. Though my mother should be ready for a break from kids. She has twin toddlers at the moment."

"I can send yours back to you after cuddling them." His mother said.

"Yeah, I've already tried that." Harry told him, "she's prepared."

"Of course, she is. We're going to have to rearrange weekends around, so every grandparent and honorary uncle has quality time."

"Just imagine the weekends without kids though. I'm sure we can think of something to pass the time away."

"HAROLD!"

"What? Practice makes perfect." Louis slapped Harry with the closest item which happened to be a spatula. Harry quickly dodged the swats as he ran out of the kitchen.

***

Trick or Treat was a long three hours filled with adorable kids coming up to them with large grins and most of them greeting Harry by name. Afterwards they spent a few hours laughing and talking in the living room before Harry, Anne, and Jay went into the kitchen to start the pot pies and other food.

"DADDY! I NEED HELP!" Maddie shouted as she came running down the stairs out of her costume, but her hair piece was tangled in her hair which was a whole mess.

"Sweetie, I can't right now, and I told you not to touch your hair without help, didn't I?" Harry said gently.

"But daddy please. Mom said if it gets stuck again, she'll cut my hair." Maddie said crying, "I didn't want it to get stuck and have it cut."

"Maddie sweetie as much as I want to help you I really can't. I told you not to touch your hair now out of my kitchen with your hair please and thank you."

"But daddy you have to help. It hurts and it's a knot and mom says she'll cut it." Maddie pleaded crying more.

"Your mother isn't here to cut it Mads. You'll be fine for an hour as soon as I'm finished, I'll handle your hair, okay?" Maddie stomped her feet and folded her arms pouting.

"But daddy-"

"Maddison. Not right now. In one hour, I can help but I can't right now and that is something you'll have to accept."

"Grandma-"

"Maddison Rayne." Maddison made a closed mouth scream towards Harry as she stomped her foot again before she ran upstairs slamming a door closed. Louis only lasted a minute before he snuck upstairs and poked his head into Maddison's room seeing her sitting on her bed crying.

"Hey, can I come in?" Louis asked getting a nod, so he entered the room closing the door behind him, "you know Maddison I have a ton of sisters and each other has had at least ten knots I've helped get out of their hair all without scissors." Louis told her.

"Really?"

"Of course. I know we haven't had me and you time to talk about your dad and I, but I am marrying him. I'm marrying you too essentially. I know I said I become your stepparent when I say I Do with your dad, but even right now you are my stepdaughter. That means if your dad is busy doing whatever he us doing and you need help you can always come to me and if I can, I will help you as much as you need me to."

"I didn't want to bother you...Daniel doesn't like it when I ask him for help. He tells me I'm not his responsibility just because he's with my mom."

"I'm not Daniel. You are my responsibility this week as much as you are your dads. You're my daughter too, you never have to call me anything you don't want to either it be Papa or Mr. Tomlinson. The title doesn't make the parent, the love and support does, and I love you and will always support you and I will always have your back. In one hour, we can trick your dad into going outside and we can throw water balloons at him as payback for making you cry." Maddison giggled as she wiped her eyes and face with her sleeves and looked at him.

"Really?"

"Yes really. Now how about I help you with this tiara and we paint each other’s nails in a fall color? Sound good?"

Maddison smiled and nodded climbing onto her knees and hugging him tightly. Louis kissed her head rubbing her back before he got up and went to grab the hair things for Maddie's hair in the kids shared bathroom. Maddie had a light pink basket full of curly hair care products and decanters as well as combs and hair accessories. He grabbed it and headed into her room sitting them upfront of her floor length mirror on her closet door and got to work. He never had to deal with curly hair like Maddie’s, but he soon got the hang of it and they never noticed when Harry came up only to stand in the doorway watching as they sang Disney songs and Louis carefully detangled her hair. Maddie had dressed up as Rosie the riveter and Harry had done her up in an updo with her bandana looped through her hair, so it hadn't fallen off and thus when Maddie tried to undo it all she had ended up with a mess. A mess that took over an hour to undo but once it was finished and Louis was able to come through it no problem he went and got the nail polish form her kit.

"Thank you LouLou." Maddie said as she hugged Louis around his neck once their nails had been dried. Louis grinned as he hugged again rubbing her back.

"You are most welcome. You can ask me for help anytime." Maddie nodded, "now how about we go downstairs, and you say sorry. Just a tiny one."

"Okay." Maddison held Louis' hand as they head out of the room and down the stairs. Harry was in the living room with Freddie lying beside him as they laid on the loveseat and watched Wall-E together. Maddie skipped over and carefully crawled on top of Harry situating herself comfortable as she cuddled up to him.

"I'm sorry daddy."

"Thank you, sweetie. I love you you know that right?"

"I love you too Daddy. I was scared but I didn't have to act like that."

"It's okay. Your emotions still get the best of you at times. Your nails are very pretty."

"Thank you LouLou and I paint each other's nails and looky he got my hair untangled without scissors." She said sitting up and pulling her hair over her shoulder to show him.

"I see that. He might be better than me with all the practice he has with his sisters." Harry said as he looked up at Louis.

"Not with curly hair mind you, but enough practice it didn't take us that long to get the worst of it." Louis said folding his arms on the air of the sofa and leaning down to press a chaste kiss to Harry's puckered lips, "besides I'm a big softie when it comes to tears, I only last a minute after she ran upstairs."

"That’s because you're a great Papa who doesn't let a baby cry for more than a minute."

"You mean I'm weak."

"You went through a c-section and want to do it again. I'd call you incredibly strong before I ever call you weak. As much as I wish I could carry sometimes I do not want to go through that and if I had I'd never do it again."

"The only reason I'm so willingly to do it again is because I know this time will be different. I'll have a cute doctor fussing over me as much as I fuss over the baby. I may even be able to have him do the heavy lifting for the first few weeks."

"The lifting, the carrying, the picking up, the bending, you name it, and I shall do it for as long as you need." Harry said pulling Louis back down for an awkward but sweet kiss, "also I'm more than cute I'm drop dead sexy when I'm awake at three on the morning making sure your stitches aren't infected and you're not in pain."

"Oh, right my bad." Louis said rolling his eyes as he straightened up and moved off to where he heard Zayn, Liam, and Niall were at in the other living room drinking and playing FIFA.

"Hey, grab a beer and join us. You have enough designated sober for you and Harry to drink a little." Niall said.

"Let me guess Harry said not unless I did it." Louis guessed folding his arms watching as Liam and Niall blushed guiltily, "I don't care if he drinks you know."

"We know that, but he respects you too much and he probably doesn't want you to think badly of him with y'know his past drinking problem after Hannah kept Maddie from him." Louis also didn't know about that but didn't let it show as he left and grabbed two beers from the fridge then headed to Harry and put one on his chest.

"Will you drink before your friends decide I'm a bad influence on you and controlling you through telepathic connections or something." Louis said.

"What if I don't want to drink."

"All your friends are doing it." Louis teased waving the can upfront of his face making him laugh.

"Peer pressure. Really."

"Yes, now chug it and shut it." Louis said kissing his cheek before heading back to the other room and grabbing the spare controller as he flopped on to the large beanbag chair that the lads had dragged upstairs from the basement living/gaming room.

****

After dinner Louis took his family to the basement where the guest rooms were located for them there were a total of four guest rooms down there, one with a queen size mattress, and two rooms had two twin size bunkbeds with the stairs in the middle and the last one had two full size bunkbeds with the stairs in the middle. Louis helps his mom set up the travel crib then held get the twins ready since Dan was still with Harry getting the bags. The evening turned late and one by one everyone was in guest rooms or bedrooms and Harry and Louis were finally alone and relaxing on the couch with Louis’ back pressed against Harry's front.

"We should get to bed." Harry said.

"I know but I can't get up. I'm tired. Besides, I've got questions for you that I know I will forget if I sleep on them."

"Oh? And what are those questions?" Harry asked amused.

"Niall mentioned you had a drinking problem? When Hannah left?"

"Oh that? Yeah, I guess. I was pissed and my lawyer said there was nothing that could be done until we proved paternity, so I drank and went out to the clubs a lot. It got a bit...obsessive I guess but I never really considered it a problem. Like I could stop I just didn't want to. I was stupid the first six months but then the DNA test came back, and my lawyer said I had to get my life together and so I did. Instantly. One weekend I was at the pubs and the next I was home or working. Guess it didn't really occur to me to tell you that." Louis nodded understanding where Harry was coming from.

"Is that why you won't casually drink?"

"No, I just don't want to be unavailable for Maddie or Freddie if they need something. Liam and Niall don't understand that, I get it y'know they don't mean any harm by it and a few beers never hurt anyone, but I've always been scared of drinking one night and not being able to drive Maddie to the hospital because the ambulances were out of order or something. I don't know. It's a weird parenting nightmare I get every once in a while."

"I will never let you get so drunk you wouldn't be able to function as a father around the kids. That's where I draw the line but drinking with your mates with a dozen people here sober is completely fine. No one will think twice of that."

"I know I just feel wrong...like I'm being judged or something. Choosing beer over my kids. I never want to do that."

"And you never will." Louis promised, "your mother mentioned something today as well. Well, a few things."

"Oh God. Whatever it was I swear there's an explanation."

"No but now I know I've gotta ask her for the good stuff. No, she mentioned your childhood very very very briefly. Like she completely skipped over it thinking I already knew. Which if you don't want to tell me that's fine." Harry tense for a second before he sighed and scooted Louis closer against his front, "you don't have to-"

"My mom was young when she fell pregnant with my sister. She got kicked out of her rich family’s home with nothing but a bag of clothes and a fee bundles of cash. She was able to get a job as a waitress after dropping out of school and she got a studio. My dad, my biological dad that is, he didn't want to lose the money from his money and my mom was young and naive, so she stayed with him. When I came my dad left after taking the money my mom glad hidden away for emergencies. Fast forward two years and my mom was poor, like poor poor. I was potty trained because my mom couldn't afford diapers and because of this the carpet in the living room smell horrible. We had a beat-up couch with a pull-out bed that smelled. When I got older, I remember being so embarrassed by it, obviously I couldn't control it and mom and Gem always said it wasn't my fault, but I hated it. Obviously, it wasn't only me, Gem had accidents too, but it was mostly me. Anyway, my mom spent everything on the electric and water, the two most important things. Then she spent it on her phone so she could be called into work y'know. Then the little she had left was just enough for bread, peanut butter, and sometimes a fruit of our choice to share. So, for most of my childhood we ate peanut butter toast for breakfast and peanut butter bread folded up for lunch and dinner. I can’t eat peanut butter to this day, like plain peanut butter. I can eat it with something but not ever in large amounts.” Louis shifted around so he was able to look at Harry, he played with a bracelet Maddie had given Louis to give to Harry a few weeks ago during art. He was clearly thinking about it from the faraway look he had on his face, “My mom suddenly stopped wanting us to go to the stores with her and she’d bring home groceries. Real groceries. She’d cook and we ate vegetables and fruits and had food we were allowed to snack on. Gemma and I thought she was stealing and so we started telling mom to stop and that we were fine. We met Robin a few days later, mom done everything to get rid of the smell that lingered in the studio apartment.” Harry’s lips twitched in a small smile that only now looking back on it all was he able to release in light humor,

“She bought a mattress from a goodwill and got rid of the couch and had the mattress on the floor for all three of us. I remember mom had us all showed that morning because the water was being shut off the next day and so we all helped do laundry in the bath and then hung them to dry. Robin walked into the door in a lab coat and Gemma started freaking out, crying. She thought mom was giving us away, up for adoption, Gemma was begging mom not letting her get a word in to explain. She told her she would go without food so I could eat and that she would help out as much as she could and went on this rant. It was like she was prepared to plead our case and I don’t doubt she was. I started crying when Gemma went on and on because I was scared, and mom just looked so helpless and guilty. After mom was able to calm us down and explain Robin was a friend of hers and was a doctor, we slowly opened up to him. I was practically his son within a month. He and I just grew close because I asked him about his work, I knew doctors made a lot of money so in my mind I would become a doctor and help my mom out with money. It made perfect sense. Mom and Robin moved fast, I don’t know if mom was just desperate at first or if they had known each other longer than they let on, Gemma and I never asked because Robin was our dad and mom married him. I know mom loves him now, I know mom has loved him for a long time, not sure how long, but long enough that it doesn’t matter anymore to me to know the truth. They met when mom was at work, he’s been a regular for years, but mom never had him as a customer, barely even saw him before then. One day she had him as a customer and I guess they just hit it off. He saw her at the store a few weeks later after a few more times meeting at the restaurant and he told me something just told him to give her his groceries. So, he did. Mom said she was having a bad week that week and that home life was stressful, and her boss had almost fired her so when he gave her his groceries she just cried and told him everything. Just ranted. Poor guy was just trying to do something nice and got ranted at. He drove her home and started tipping her bigger and then asked to buy her and us dinner without us knowing of course. They never really did give us a complete timeline, but they made it sound like it was going on for a few months at least before mom introduced us.” Louis was smiling, chuckling when Harry empathized with Robin being ranted towards, “When I was old enough to realize what happened, like why things changed so dramatically for us, I wrote him this long letter for Father’s Day because it was coming up and I have it to him as soon as he woke up and I left for school. I was pulled out of school not an hour later by Robin and we had a father son week, he literally kidnapped me and took me to Greece only telling my mother when she called him frantic that I wasn’t home after school and Gem hadn’t seen me all day. When we got back Mom was there waiting for us and ripped us a new one right in the middle of the airport. Not giving a damn about who was watching us. That lecture lasted an entire month.”

“Your mom says you’re too cautious with your spending because of it. Is that true?”

“I guess in a way. I mean I have a lot of money from all different kinds of things and this house is completely paid off, I don’t have any debt or loans. I know how much I have in my savings accounts and all of that stuff. I know how much I have inside this house and how much I carry with me. I guess that is something we should talk about whether you want to join our bank accounts or keep them separate or what.”

“Yeah, that is something we should talk about but after I’ve had sleep.” Louis said resting his head in his hand as he stared at Harry, “I couldn’t even imagine it. What you went through. My mom wasn’t the richest, but always made the end meet in the end and we were always full. She may not have been, but we were. She’s a nurse which was good money for one two even three kids, but then more and more babies came. I don’t even know when she found the time or energy. Nor do I want to, but still. She worked so much and did so much in so little hours that sometimes when I look back, I feel like she had magic to make the time slow down. I have no idea how she did everything and still had time for every child that needed her. I guess that’s why I stepped in so early, I saw my mom needed help and so I was there. Changing diapers, feeding babies, changing clothes, burping. Whatever it was. I don’t why I ever thought I wouldn’t be a carrier; I was bloody natural at seven years old.” Harry laughed shaking his head.

“You are a natural. Thank you by the way for earlier with Maddie.”

“Of course. You don’t need to thank me for that. She is my soon to be stepdaughter after all. I don’t think Daniel has left a good idea of what a stepparent is supposed to do and its easier spending time with her when we’re in familiar school territory. It’s different here, I guess. More…personal, I keep forgetting she’s still a child, only six. She had to grow up so much around her mother…she’s completely different here than she is there or with her. It’s like she isn’t afraid to express normal attitude and emotion. Like earlier Maddie has never even remotely given attitude to anyone that I’ve seen.”

“The first time she came over she had this huge tantrum, she had behavioral problems so bad, and she just broke everything she could possibly reach and then she cried. At first, I was mad yknow, she broke a tv, she broke mugs, plates, literally everything. But then I thought about it. I remembered what my mom used to tell me that the child acts up the most around a parent they trust. So, I sat down on the couch and I waited. I waited over two hours I think when finally, Maddie came over and started crying. She was three at the time I think, maybe four, I’m not quite sure so at that age she didn’t have all the proper vocabulary to tell me what she was feeling, and she was behind on her development anyway. I just remember holding her as she sniffled herself to sleep and then I got up and I felt like such a failure. My baby was hurting, and I couldn’t do anything to help her because I got a job that took so many hours of my life away and there was no routine or schedule. So, I promised myself that even if Maddie came over and broke everything in the house each and every visit, I would do everything I could to get her over here as often as possible. I started looking for someone to settle down with, it wouldn’t be casual it wouldn’t be testing the road, it would be the long haul. I started with women; I knew my best bet was getting a housewife. A normal life and family. One a judge couldn’t look at and disagree with. Never went past a first date because obviously by then I had explored through drinking and pubs and everything else I much preferred the male body. So, I started dating men and as you know men didn’t want babies in their twenties. They want casual sex and relationships and that was it. I stopped about a year ago, gave up and resigned myself into not getting my daughter at all and quitting my job and finding something else to do. I started looking at jobs and things to do with my degree with better hours. I was very desperate to just find something to help me so I could help my daughter. Then the hospital announced they were opening a bigger pediatric ward with scheduled days and routine weeks. But it wouldn’t be ready for two years. Then Hannah told me about Daniel’s potential promotion, and I knew I didn’t have two years.” Louis knew where it led to, where the desperation of a father wanting to do right by his daughter led. He grinned and leaned over pressing a not at all chaste kiss to Harry’s lips.

“Lucky for you, you found me then huh?” Harry laughed but nodded pulling Louis in for deeper kiss, “I am not having sex with you with our families here.”

“Buzzkill. Come on let’s get to bed. Any later and none of our families is getting cooked breakfast in the morning.” Louis followed Harry upstairs after they turned off the lights and set the alarm, Gizmo and Bear following close behind them only for Bear to enter Maddie’s room and Gizmo to enter Freddie’s. When they entered the bedroom they crawled into bed and cuddled up together falling asleep almost instantly.

#Larry Stylinson #larries #larry shippers #larry fanfiction #larry stylinson fanfiction #fake marriage #nonfamous au #larry fake marraige au #Wattpad #archive of our own #parents au #teacher louis #doctor harry styles

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yikes-xander · 4 years ago

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PLAYLIST ANALYSIS

This is actually me just rambling about my thoughts on each song and why I chose them for this specific playlist rather than like.. an actually good and smart sounding in-depth analysis sorry :/

When I Met You - Ethan Nestor

There are many reasons I chose this one! Mostly the lyrics, but Ethan also sings it so it’s extra fitting for the playlist, especially as the opener.

“When I met you my life was blue, I was so lonely / You took me by surprise” The channel came into my life at the perfect time. I was feeling low, in my last year of high school, struggling with thoughts about the future. It especially helped me through quarantine. Every day I felt like quitting, giving up on putting effort into school/not graduating, but I had something to look forward to every day too, so I pushed through.

“Now you're gone from my life / I'm adrift on the sea” Once the stream ended and the channel was gone, I didn’t know how I felt. I felt sad, but also something I’ve never felt before. After watching Ethan’s video yesterday, hearing him explain he felt the same way, I felt so relieved. I think this lyric kind of describes how I feel now honestly, just kinda numb? Like I’m lost. I’m working on it.

Another Night - Story Untold

More of a light-hearted one now! To me, this song made me think about how good it felt to be a part of the audience.

“Here we go for another night / Another night goofing all around” Everyone (the audience, Mark, Ethan, etc.) having fun every single day? *chefs kiss*

“Laughing 'til our stomachs hurt / And I can't let this moment pass me by” Once again, made me think of all the good times that were a part of the channel, and all the good feelings they gave me.

“So here’s to a night we’ll remember / This is a time we never wanna forget” I think this is kind of self-explanatory? I don’t think any of us want to forget Unus Annus. Personally, it’s literally the best thing I’ve ever had the chance to see happen and be a part of.

100 Bad Days - AJR

This song just gives me good vibes, UA gave me good vibes, it had to be on the playlist. I don’t have much else to say about it.

History - One Direction

This song kind of reminds me of Ethan and Mark separately and UA as a whole. Because like,, they make a great team, they have a lot of history (friends for a long time, Ethan was a fan of Mark before that, etc.)

“You and me got a whole lot of history / So don't let it go, we can make some more, we can live forever” A year is a long time but also feels like no time at all. Sometimes I wish we had more time for UA, but I’m glad I was here for what we got.

“This is not the end” Unus Annus is something I’ll never forget.

Dopamine - With Confidence

Maybe also kind of self-explanatory? Dopamine makes you feel good!! UA also makes me feel good. And the song talks about losing it too so.. yeah

This Is Home - Cavetown

I’m not exactly sure why I felt so drawn to this? But the vibes are immaculate.

“Are you dead? / Sometimes I think I'm dead / 'Cause I can feel ghosts and ghouls wrapping my head / But I don't wanna fall asleep just yet” after the stream vibes anyone? Or is it just me? I stayed up way too long after it was over. Too many thoughts head full

“Time is / Slowly / Tracing his face / But strangely he feels at home in this place” Unus and Annus,, the Boys of Time babey!!

Ghost Of You - 5 Seconds of Summer

Again.. The VIBES are IMMACULATE. It’s just a sad song for a sad time.

“Too young, too dumb / To know things like love” I’m just a stupid boy who got emotionally attached to a channel whose whole purpose was to DIE and I’m sensitive about it.

All I Wanted - Paramore

Lyrics make me do a Think

“Wake up early to black and white re-runs” colors of the channel,, thinking about all the vids,, the memories :(

“I could follow you to the beginning / And just to relive the start / And maybe then we'll remember to slow down / At all of our favorite parts” this entire verse?? Oh my god. Absolutely *chefs kiss* I think we all know what I mean and like,, why it gives me UA vibes

The Kids from Yesterday - My Chemical Romance

This song just gives me like sad nostalgic vibes so I thought it fit well.

“... you only hear the music when your heart begins to break” the timer reaches the end and the ticking stops? Heartbreaking, that’s all

I Will Follow You into the Dark - Death Cab for Cutie

Another song thats just,, sad so it fits

“Love of mine, someday you will die” we knew from the start the the channel would literally die when the clock stopped,,

“It's nothing to cry about 'cause we'll hold each other soon / In the blackest of rooms” shut up I’m mourning someone hold my hand

“I got my knuckles bruised by a lady in black” death goddess Amy vibes

I’ll Always Be Around - Waterparks

“If you died I'd hope you'd haunt me / Because you know I'd miss you bad” we all love UA so much!! And miss it a ton already

“I'd never I'd never I'd never get you off my mind” it’s always thinking about Unus Annus hours

Before You Go - Lewis Capaldi

There are multiple lyrics in this song that just make me remember we only have our memories of the channel left

“Our every moment, I start to replace / 'Cause now that they're gone, all I hear are the words that I needed to say” the vids are replaced with only memories, replayed over and over

“Well, time can heal but this won't” I’ll be sad about this forever mind ur business

“But all I can think about is seeing that look on your face” the very last moment of the stream? Amy and Mark looking at the camera, Mark’s lil smile, Ethan looking back at the clock as the last few seconds tick by? AAAAH

Scarlet Cross - Black Veil Brides

Heard this and immediately reverted back to my middle school self but that’s beside the point.

“... you can't deny / The end is coming, the end is coming” we knew from the start that the channel would die

“Will we live? / Will we die? / Just keep on saving our goodbyes” There were points where people were theorizing that the channel wouldn’t actually end, there were clips near the end where the clock reversed by a few seconds, etc. need I say more?

“Hold onto me, and I can't let go” we’re all mourning, we didn’t want to say goodbye I know I’m not the only sad one

Body - Mother Mother

This song just SCREAMS Unus and Annus vibes I think we can all agree

“I've grown tired of this body / Fall apart without me, body” Unus and Annus are just entities using Ethan and Mark’s bodies,, they know their time is up so they have to leave,, the LORE it makes sense okay leave me alone

Here Comes the End - Gerard Way (ft Judith Hill)

At this point I’m just listing lyrics that I vibe with that remind me of UA and also make me sad but that’s because I’m dumb and I don’t know how to express myself or explain my thoughts oops

“The time is running out / The days are moving fast” literally every day after each video,, seeing the clock tick down? My HEART she hurt

“The clock is moving / Hands to midnight / Can we get through this?” For me, the stream ended right at midnight so THE VIBES I was sobbing

When Can I See You Again? - Owl City

“Switch on the sky and the stars glow for you / Go see the world 'cause it’s all so brand new” this lyric remind me of the vid where they were in the desert and they just looked at the stars and had a nice talk it was so wholesome I love them

“It's been fun but now I've got to go / Life is way too short to take it slow” Unus Annus is gone but we all have to remember to live, do what you want with no regrets.

(Don’t Fear) The Reaper - Blue Oyster Cult

This one is another pretty self explanatory one honestly

It’s also just a vibe like a lot of the other songs that’s all I have to say about it

Safe and Sound - Capital Cities

This song just radiates such good feelings man oof

Unus Annus felt like such a safe lil bubble for me?? Like,, Mark and Ethan did dumb shit because they WANTED TO I felt so validated like,, I also would do dumb shit if I could that probably makes no sense but I love them so it doesn’t matter

Happiest Year - Jaymes Young

This one absolutely BREAKS MY HEART

“I'm here to admit / That you were my medicine” yall,, UA was the only thing that kept me going and I'm not afraid to admit it

“Thank you for the happiest year of my life” literally the only thing that gave me serotonin oops :/

“So wake me up when they build that time machine / I want to go back” do I need to explain? Even though this year has been shitty irl, I would relive it in a heartbeat

The 3ND - Story Untold

I know this is a breakup song,, but hear me out

Some of the lyrics FIT and it’s my playlist I can do what I want shut up

“I never wanted what we had to end / But now it's over” once again,, no need to explain

“I know we had our dreams and we had plans… / That now it's time to let go” this just makes me think of the video where they talk about the video ideas they had but never filmed or just didn't post,, the CONTENT WE COULD'VE GOTTEN i'm sad

Still Remembering - AS IT IS

These boys.. My fave band of all time but also literally all their songs have immaculate vibes

“My heart's as heavy / As these nights are long” this gives me after the stream feels,, I stayed up way too long after it ended I couldn't sleep because I was sad :/

“Can you tell me what hurts more / Is it remembering or forgetting?” The whole chorus just hits me so hard man I'm so scared that I'm gonna forget unus annus because my brain is shitty even though I know I won't? I’m deadass getting a tattoo as soon as I can

Take Me Away - With Confidence

This song just makes me think about how UA was kind of an escape for me? And a lot of people yknow sometimes you just need to get your mind off of this happening around you and UA was really good for that in my opinion

The Night We Met - Lord Huron

Once again saying I would relive this year if I had the chance

Unus Annus was one of a kind, no one will ever be able to recreate it

Where’d All the Time Go? - Dr. Dog

A year sounds like such a long time but it goes by way too fast

Also I think Amy had this on her instagram story after the stream? I don't remember but THE VIBES

This December - Ricky Montgomery

Why do so many ricky montgomery songs have UA vibes? Idk

“Well, this December, I'll remember / Want you to see it when I do” UA ended in november,, we’ll remember in december and forever it FITS

“It’s just a little bit, It’s just a little bit / Lonely in this home / It’s always colder on your own'' honestly now that UA is gone there's like,, a void and I'm sad (I keep saying that but it's true so..)

When You Die - MGMT

Maybe this is the song Amy had in her story after the stream? Again,, I don’t remember

I think this one is also pretty self explanatory

Except I was feeling A LOT when the channel died but I’m glad the team was also kinda in their feels a bit yknow? It made me feel better about it

Good Times - All Time Low

“Underneath the stars we came alive / And singing to the sky just felt right / I won't forget the good times” once again,, that stargazing vid? IM CRYING all the vids gave me so much serotonin I loved them all and each day was such a good day

“I'll hate the goodbye” I don't need to explain..

“Middle fingers up, ego trip / Devil may care but we didn't mind” the chaotic vibes of the channel is what sucked me in I live for chaos that's what this lyric makes me think of

Goodnight, Travel Well - The Killers

I don't think I really need to explain this one because,, just listen to the song and you'll get it but I'll just list some fave lyrics of mine

“There's nothing I can say / There's nothing we can do now” end of the stream vibes for sure

“And all that stands between the souls release / This temporary flesh and bone / We know that it's over now” Unus and Annus vibes

Line Without a Hook - Ricky Montgomery

This is one of the songs that I hear a lot in like edits I see on twitter and stuff associated with UA and I Get It the vibes are so good the song is so good I love it

“Oh, baby, I am a wreck when I'm without you / I need you here to stay” one of my fave lyrics and also just,, makes sense I miss UA

As the World Caves In - Matt Maltese

Another song that's in a lot of edits and stuff that's also,, amazing and MAKES SENSE the vibes!!

“And here it is, our final night alive” the STREAM

“You put your finest suit on / I paint my fingernails / Oh we're going out in style babe” Our boys,, Unus and Annus in the suits and eths painted nails? An absolute LOOK

I just love this song so much its so good and makes me so sad

The End. - My Chemical Romance

This song is just So Sad

And the heart monitor beeping in the beginning?? Reminds me of the clock ticking my heart is BROKEN

If you actually read all of this? I love you!! This was 6 pages so thank you for sticking through and listening to all of my dumb thoughts

#playlist #analysis #dumb thoughts #unus annus #i wouldve formatted this better but it crashed like 3 times so i kinda gave up #also.. highly suggest actually listening to the songs #the playlist i mad eis in the playlist tag on my blog

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