#so even though he now realized he didnt value time enough he still has no time

[the-jam-to-the-unicorn]

If you wanna be happy (because Ze with students) but also sad at the same time (because of what he says) ... this is your video

[starheirxero]

I've come to a realization, and decided, to ramble again! Fair warning, it might get a little out of focus? I have a lot to say, but I'm trying to make it understandable-

So:

Lunar is in the belief, that they are still on Eclipse's strings.

And the tragic truth is, they are right. Just not in the way they thought.

Looking back on Eclipse's death, knowing everything we do, Lunar, logically, was in control of the situation.

They have the powers, and Eclipse has nothing. Even though he thought, he might "rip the stars out", he was fully aware, that he was weak. He had to rely on the control he already held over Lunar's head.

And in a way, it worked.

The control Eclipse has is the reaction. Eclipse makes Lunar react.

It is something that I've noticed from the beginning, even before Lunar's death.

Eclipse bites, sinking sharp teeth into people's throats with his words. But Lunar and him aren't so different.

Because Lunar bites back.

Eclipse has the natural ability to make them aggressive. Everytime he wrongs them, everytime he bites and claws, Lunar will bite back. He has the ability to make them snap.

Lunar's reaction to Eclipse is to counter, to growl, to fight back. Something that they might have gotten from Eclipse himself, or maybe old Moon, and even Bloodmoon.

The only difference? Before, they would know their limit. Before, there was a limit. But now they have powers, now they have the ability to fight them physically, no longer held back. So they don't hold back.

On my first few watch throughs, Eclipse seemed to have complete control of the situation, even though, logically, it was Lunar.

But the reason is Lunar. We see it through their perspective. Lunar didn't feel in control, because Eclipse knew exactly which buttons to push. Making them feel smaller, calling them old names, making fun of them, making them feel unheard by checking his nails when they were talking. He made them react, made them use their powers.

Of course, it wasn't quite planned like this, but to be honest? I think Eclipse got exactly what he wanted.

Because he didn't seem upset, not even fearful! He was cackling and out of breath, sounding amused, maybe even delighted.

Maybe it's the realization that he's still in control. Maybe it's the realization, that Lunar still feels so strongly about him.

Or maybe he's finding satisfaction in knowing, that they are not so different after all. That he still managed to mold Lunar into an image similar to him.

And even though Lunar felt relief, they only spun themselves deeper into their puppet strings by doing so.

Because their teeth are dull. Eclipse's are sharp, because of how much Lunar truly cares. A part of the reason for their anger was the realization, that Eclipse didnt change.

He didn't feel remorse. He acted the exact same. Lunar, deep within, hoped for him to care, to love them, even if he never showed it. And their reunion proved them wrong, showed them that Eclipse truly doesn't care about them. To him, they have always been a tool, and they are even now.

They wanted their brother to love them. It's all they ever wanted, from the moment they gained consciousness.

And so their affection turns into a familiar anger. The anger, that tries to get a reaction out of him. Something to prove, that there is something more inside of him. They want to hurt him, just like how he hurt them.

But their teeth are dull. Because Eclipse doesn't care enough, doesn't value them. Their words leave him unaffected, for he doesn't care what they have to say, what pain he caused them.

So anger turns into rage, which turns into hatred, as that little spark of hope dies out, focusing on familiar rage instead. It is easier than the mess in their mind anyways.

Interestingly enough, this whole time, Earth is completely ignored. She's present, but neither of the brothers acknowledge her. Lunar is tunnel-visioning onto Eclipse, reinforcing once more, how much control he holds over them.

It is, in all senses, a tragedy.

-Stardust

NOOOOOOOOO OH MY GHOD STOP YOU'RE LITERALLY RIGHT FUCK EVERYTHING FOREVERRRRRR

HE WILL ALWAYS HAVE CONTROL OVER LUNAR AS LONG AS THEY LET THEIR RAGE ABOUT HIM CONSUME THEM WHOLE. THEY CANNOT PIERCE SKIN THAT DOES NOT CARE FOR THEIR BITE AAUAGAHGHGHHHH!!!!!!!!!

[randomreadingtimewithtsuki]

I crawl out my cave once in a blue moon when I see someone opening requests for Dr. Stone. Also hi!! I love your background image i will now proceed to have Sugar Song to Bitter Step stuck in my head for the next couple of days!!

Id like to request a Gen x Reader (from the modern era) where Suika notices that the two have feelings for each other and tries to do something about it!

Thank you! Good luck on your requests!!

Hello!

I love Kekkai sensen and Klaus XD so i am not sorry for the song!

Thank you for requesting!

I hope this is of your liking please let me know what you think!

Tsuki's note: well, i did some background hope you don't mind? Also this is so cute! Detective/cupid Suika on the job! I Feel like this came out a bit weird

---------------------------------------------------------------

You joined the kingdom of science soon after Tsukasa's empire crashed down. You weren't exactly on his side, but you also couldn't just leave.

When you joined the kingdom of science, you were soon placed on the negotiators/political team along with Gen. Why? you had a knack for raking information out of people in a sweet and discreet way. You were also great at reading people, catching the little nuances.

Team in itself was just the two of you. Because it was so small you ended up getting close to each other. At first, you would help Senku read the situation and understand what you guys needed. Gen did the negotiation for the goods, you just read the people around.

Soon enough, Gen started to get a bit anxious in letting you talk to menacing people on your own - what if thy hurt you? sure, Kohaku would be with you, but still.

You, on the other hand got very upset thinking he didnt' trust your skills. After all, he was a sweet talker, so even when he said you are great at negotiation you did not buy it.

These situations let to a few arguments between you two, which caused some worried in one of the youngest members - Suika.

As a great detective she is, she took time to talk to you both separately. She gathered some information out of the situation:

Gen did trust your abilities, he was just worried about your safety.

You wanted him to see value at what you did.

For some odd reason either of you didn't want to tell the other something.

She noticed how oddly frustrated you, you are not someone to get easily affected by this kind of thing, but here you were, beyond frustrated.

And Gen for some reason, was very anxious about you taking front in some occasion. He always trusted the fighting team to keep everyone safe. Odd.

She took upon her to watch you both more closely and try to get you to chat more with her. With time she came to realize that, even though there were this tensions, you two were very close.

Gen showed you magic tricks and you absolutely loved it! You helped him organize his next motivational speech aka trickery.

Suika noticed that most the magic tricks performed for you involved some kind of gift like a flower or a flower bracelet. You always got very happy and wore them until they whiltered. A slight blush could be seen in your face while you tied the bracelet.

Thats when it hitted her: what if you both had a crush on each other? It would explain why you'd get so frustrated and why Gen was oddly protective of you! Yes! makes sense!

But how could she approach you two about it? Asking you directly seemed an option but... Would either of you open up? Gen probably wouldn't, you? maybe.

She thought really hard for a few days. How could she trick you both? You could easily see through people...Until she had one plan! Suika figured if she asked both you for help you could bond or perhaps be honest with each other.

Her plan? pretty simple! Suika could recall somethings you absolutely loved in the modern era, she did not quite know what they were, so she decided to ask Gen what it was. Same story with you, she knew somethings he missed and asked you about it.

Why? to feed you both information about things and maybe you guys had a bit more things in common!

At first neither of you thought anything of it, just a kid being curious. But after a while it started getting oddly suspicious. Why she wouldn't ask directly to him?

The first one to confront Suika was Gen. He asked her why she never asked you about those things. She stuttered a bit claiming to be a bit shy to ask. Odd. something is up.

You asked her why she didn't ask Senku instead. She said she rather ask you. Odd.

After a few days when the both of you were together, you realized you knew quite a bit about one another - things about the past. You ended bonding over a few foods you missed, besides cola.

Thats when it hitted you and Gen. You only knew those things because of Suika. What was she trying to do? You didn't immediatly grasped her idea, but Gen did.

His face flared up suddenly and told you an excuse to leave. Minutes after he left you also realized her idea - make you two bond a bit more and talk more. Did she know you had a crush on him? But wait, wait wait. He left suddenly.

The gears on your head were on full spin, ears fuming with the idea that your crush had a crush on you.

The first moments after this event together was a bit awkward. But it didn't take long for Gen to start lowkey flirting with you. He knew you liked him too.

The observer of the whooooooooole thing, Suika, was more than happy to watch you both slowly becoming a lovely couple!

---------------------------------------------------------------

Thanks for reading!

I am not going to lie it was hard to come up with the end i had tons of ideas but they all seem.... off.

[okkottsus]

I love reading your analysis of Nagireo!

One thing I was wondering, what do you think of Nagi (foreshadowed) future slump?

I feel like things will get dire for him, and I can't help but wonder how Reo would react.

Nagi feels very... emotionally immature and while Reo can be very fiery and we saw how emotional he can get, he's the one that feels more in touch with his own emotions and has better life experience.

For better or worse, being away from Reo forced Nagi to confront his own feelings more.

I wonder if Reo won't realize they got back together too early and leave him (this time maybe more amicably? Or maybe force himself to leave him) for his own sake.

Ego's dialog feels very ominous... they were very happy in that moment but there is a very sense of "now what?".

thank u so much, i feel like i never express myself well enough esp with characters and relationships im passionate abt so that means a lot 🥺

yeah i get what u mean about nagi's emotional immaturity...in the latest match, when isagi asked him how he was able to make his best play yet a reality, nagi  didnt really understand what had happened. he only wanted to beat isagi, that has been his first goal, the first step to achieve the bigger dream he shares with reo. 

and while he himself couldnt see that, reo was the first to notice despite everything that happened between them, so he created a chance for him to have a 1v1 with isagi. 

the problem is that, as isagi points out later, if u dont understand how u made something happen, you probably wont be able to be consistent and replicate it (this has been a recurring theme of blk since the start of the manga):

a goal that u only made happen because u had the person who knows u the best and is your closest friend give you exactly what you need in the moment, has little value in the grand scheme of things. Without a clear goal and reo’s help, nagi wouldnt have been able to do something like that. 

So the next step he should be taking is working on his weapons, instead of relying on the perfect opportunities reo can provide him with.

maybe its time for nagi to try and catch up to reo, and not only in terms of play-making 

but also in terms of self awareness 

i also love the fact that while reo can seem completely selfless when he declares this, he is also completely selfish, cause at the end of the day hes doing this for his dream, for himself. he loves playing with nagi and making him score goals, but his hard work which got him to where he is now doesnt rely on nagi being there, he hasnt abandoned himself in favor of nagi. 

BUT he still seems to always choose nagi over anyone when they are playing together and even though my shipping heart is tempted, i think thats not a good thing at all... cause their cooperation may be top class, but it also makes them predictable after a while. 

reo has learnt to play without nagi, but he needs to learn how play with nagi without forgetting everyone else on his team. 

so the way i see it, reo has made more significant progress than nagi, but he still needs to work on seeing the bigger picture when nagi is by his side.

nagi on the other hand has even more things he needs to work on. he shouldnt feel reassured bc of that one (miracle) goal or bc he managed to beat isagi once. if he ended up satisfied with just that, then he wouldnt belong in the world of professional players

Ego is right when he said that confidence and delusion are 2 different things. Nagi needs the power that will enable him to fight alone in any situation and to obtain that power, he has to confront his feelings, his weapons and his shortcomings. and that demands soul searching, practice and a lot of thinking, all things i bet nagi thinks are a pain pftt.

but i want to be optimistic and think of this as another challenge he (actually, both of them) will have to conquer. im very conflicted though, cause the way i see it, what reo needs to work on now requires them to be on the same team, while what nagi needs to work on requires alone time.

in conclusion, things may have worked out between them in terms of understanding each other, but im hoping they start understanding themselves more; acknowledging their weaknesses and taking the necessary measures to overcome them. 

i do think that reo the way he is now is more likely to realise what needs to be done than nagi, whose issues are the most urgent in my opinion. so i can def see them going their separate ways for a while again, whether its reo making that decision, or nagi, or both of them together (with the latter being the ideal for me).

[aidanchaser]

I didnt get into the grad program i wanted so im just gonna occasionally post the essays that werent good enough

There’s a picture of my mother standing on the Santa Monica pier when she was in her twenties that startles me every time I see it. “I don’t remember that,” I think to myself, and then recall that it is not a picture of me at all. 

 Like my great-grandmother washing out linens to be reused monthly, like my grandmother folding aluminum foil during the Depression, like my mother recovering old chairs in new threads, I, too, am the roots of something old remade into new growth. I am the recycled blood and bones of those who came before me.

There are many threads that tie the women of my family together, and education is perhaps one of the strongest. Teaching and learning is practically engraved into my DNA sequence. My great-grandmother taught elementary school. My grandmother taught art. My mother teaches all grades, all subjects. And now I, despite swearing as a child that I would never become a teacher, teach reading and writing.

But it isn’t just teaching that my family values. My mother and father both pursued higher degrees while my sisters and I were young. Family dinners were debates more than they were conversations. I was expected as a child to both finish my lima beans and explain my reasoning. It feels inevitable, really, that I keep returning to school no matter how hard I try to leave it.

When it came time to pursue education on my terms, beyond the requirements of high school, I knew that my path would have to be creative. I began in English, ended up in Film, and after a brief period of wandering, went back to school to study education. Like any good wanderer, I struggled to decide what to teach. I looked at programs in Ireland for film; I reviewed my art portfolio for submission; I studied for history and English exams; I studied linguistic terms late into the night.

Though I settled in English, it never felt inevitable. I have been a storyteller since I was four years old, putting together a drama amongst my stuffed animals that would rival Days of Our Lives plot twists—forbidden marriages, illicit affairs, runaway teens—but I love film and history as much as I love books, and for just the same reasons. Art and history reflect humanity in all its intricacies and complexities. Writing is just one way those stories can be told, and it is the art form that I have loved the longest. 

I’ve been reading since I was about two years old. My parents joke that they taught me the alphabet and its sounds and I was a lost cause after that. First it was books about animals, then mysteries, then fantastical adventures. I sought out stories of wonder and danger, stories where outcasts triumphed over rigid societies and righted the wrongs of their ancestors. 

As grateful as I am for my inheritance, for the love of learning that has been bred into me, there are parts of my inheritance that I am still struggling to extricate myself from. 

When I was fifteen, I realized that I was a lesbian. I didn’t know all that it meant, but I knew enough to keep my mouth shut about it. Keeping my mouth shut, though, wasn’t truly enough. It didn’t stop the letters from my grandmother when she found out that I was a bridesmaid in a lesbian wedding, warning me that my soul was in danger. It didn’t stop my mother from commenting that my childhood friends, who were now a lovely pair of brides, “Of course would still be welcome at our home, though we couldn’t attend their wedding if we were invited.” Notably, my mother was not invited.

Though there are days where it feels hard to breathe—and while I believe there will always be those days—stories are the things that have saved my life. It was the story of a young man sitting in a tea parlor with his grandmother, reminding him of how people will look at him if they knew he was gay that gave me courage to reply to my grandmother’s letters, at least insisting that I knew where I belonged even if I couldn’t tell her the truth of who I am. It was the story of a young woman coming out to her mother as a bisexual for the first time and that awkward conversations that at least allowed me to tell my mother with confidence that I wasn’t going to get married, even though I couldn’t quite tell her why.

I am still picking away at the structures I have been born into, but writing stories has been a blissful escape and a glimmer of hope. Since I was four years old, making up dramas about my stuffed animals, until today, reviewing a friend’s notes on a short story over my morning coffee, I have been telling my own stories and struggling to make order out of the complexities of living.

As I process the good and the bad that I have been born with, and that I have cultivated in myself, I am still learning how to be fully myself and to fully love myself. Right now, reading has helped me be okay with who I am. But I am tired of penciling my grief into the margins of others’ stories. I want to give back. I want to tell stories that give others the courage that I needed. It’s my earnest hope that this program will provide me with the tools I need to refine my craft and share those polished stories with others.

[moldwood]

i have 15 minutes before my work day starts, so why not have some reflections on 2023 for the lunar new year since my zodiac the dragon returns to me ☀️

PASSION

at the very end of the year, i did something i had always wanted to do and stepped down from work into a substitute position so i could focus on my art. it has been... slow, but i think it was the right move. whenever im not making something, i really cannot stand life. of course, i wont be able to stand it if i cant eat either, so well see how things turn out by the end of this year. i do think i need to get some art priorities in order, because im jumping around between a lot of projects which means theyre all getting done very slowly. i need to start focusing on one thing at a time, i think, but i really am enjoying the new stronger presence art has in my life.

MOOD

i really feel better than ever in regards to myself! most likely due to the aforementioned outpouring of passion into things ive wanted to do for YEARS. for the past few years, ive been a bit more aware of everything going on in my head than when i was a teen since i was still processing a lot of trauma, so ive been letting myself have a bit more slack on the rope in terms of "acting out of character" if that makes any sense. having a solid personality isnt something i really worry about since i know your sense of self is always shifting in every circumstance, but there were just some ways i never acted before that i let myself try on, find out its not for me, and then i end up feeling even more solid in who i am since i know what im not. i always knew i wasnt a giggly, happy-go-lucky person, but now i know that i can feel that way when i really really like someone. laios im talking about laios i have to be honest.

FRIENDSHIP

i think its my own personal failing that i overlook red flags from friends and try to make excuses for their behavior up until its too late and i have trouble not realizing that giving them an open space to be themself away from the world and support isnt enough to change that some are the type of people who are just looking for an excuse to think poorly of you anyway. i dont think im an overly kind person who will coddle someone being bad to me or a friend, but i definitely dont put my foot down enough. it happens in minor ways, but it happened in a major way again recently. if i had a dime for every time it turned into something severe, i would have two dimes. eight years apart and i let someone do the same thing, just minus suicide baiting me this time

tldr a friend of a friend sent that friend some stuff and it turns out that a friend who is no longer a friend turned into an islamophobe or at least started following islamophobic accounts and is very... delusional about the whole friendship + the kind of people we are + how we thought of him + really just wanted to think the worst of us and felt now he had a reason. we didnt read much more and felt no need to. its for the best that it's over, though, i think. he really was like that the whole friendship and didnt put any value on the things i/we did for him because it was never enough, which i knew the whole time but ignored because i thought if i did enough it would be enough, which leads me to:

i have been focusing more on loving my friends lately in the wake of that. i always have, though im not very vocal/chatty, so ive always shown it in my own way through giving drawings and gifts whenever im able. im never worried that i dont have a place in their lives, and im trying to worry less about the disconnect between how im thought of vs how i am. i think more what i am focusing on now is that i was always a very busy person, so while my friends were always very important to me, i want to do even more to show that since i want them to be sure of it. i dont have much time for any more projects, but i want to make sure they know i would do all i can for them outside of just drawing. i think this will help a bit with feeling more comfortable saying when i think something theyre doing isnt chill to me since the feeling would Hopefully go from me being bossy to me being just looking out for them being their best selves/not letting myself be misunderstood which just happens bc i dont talk very clearly not out of any lack of caring (there is a jumbled mess between my head and my mouth)

i also want to try to make new friends, or at least new acquaintances. theres a few people (mutuals 🥴) ive really wanted to talk to more, but i never know what to say. which makes sense, since i dont even talk with my friends all that much, usually only just whatever comes up in the current conversation in vc. autism damned. that boy cannot hold a conversation for his life. but maybe drawings are the way to go. my hands are all ive got IN SUMMARY

there are more thoughts and i dont have time to reread + word everything all nice because i have to work now. it is all a rambling train of thought mess. BUT tldr: life is really good right now and i feel more solid in the friendships im keeping and i am excited for my future art endeavors now that the last thing i was waiting for (the mixing palette!!!) came in. of course friendship is the longest section its the most important thing to me. anyway dreams for the year quickly ummmmm

✦ i want to learn how to use gouache. i have it! but i have to wait till i get a few projects out to get started. i think this will be very fun and very good for me because its been so long since ive played with a new medium ✦ i want to get better at small talk. how is the weather? do you like this type of weather? what type of weather do you like? what do you like to do when it is that type of weather? ✦ i want to visit prague to see if moving there would be good + feasible. my mom and half sister want to take a trip there, so i really hope that pans out and we can all go! ✦i want to work through my moral ocd about opening up a patreon/kofi and selling merch. people wouldnt subscribe if they didnt already have the money to. it doesnt matter if i make and sell 40 acrylic charms that are plastic and bad for the environment, taylor swift takes a private jet for a 20 minute car ride. ✦ i want to reach a higher fluency with arabic. its hard to find time to practice with my huge workload, so i think once i get better at time management with the projects, i can devote my mornings to a lesson a day and make better progress. ✦ lastly ig i want to try more new foods. i have been for the past several years, but i still am not the best at having good food consistently. im too busy right now to cook every day, so again i guess when i get better at time management between projects and life, i can devote some time in the week to meal prep + cooking good food. thank you laios dungeon meshi for reinforcing this. i already knew it but now theres a hot boy telling me it

2024 the year of more wahoooooo more taking more giving more drawing more cooking more dreaming more sun in the summer

[timlets]

i need yiu i think we should get married actually

i think its so funny in the anime yusuke asks kuwabara if he has a pain kink as a joke because he could never imagine why this kid keeps coming back to fight him after kuwabara literally being beaten so bad he faints almost every time

but like i think the way that kuwabara wanted to be close to yusuke and he kept coming made yusuke feel worthwhile and valued when before he was just fighting just because it was the only thing he could do and he was pissed now he has fun fighting with kuwabara who obviously cares about him so much for some reason that he keeps coming back... kuwabara is one of the only people that yusuke couldn't successfully push away and i think its because kuwabara kind of KNEW how much hurt yusuke was in all of the time because when you see someone so miserable like that you can just tell...and its almost like kuwabara with his heart wanted to help him and cared about him so fucking much im crazy. kuwabara took yusuke's fights with pride he got back up because he wanted to prove he was strong to him he wanted to impress him he wanted yusuke to see him remember his name

i think on the ither side of things yusuke just didnt understand how him, a piece of shit delinquient, could be so important to someone and he couldnt understand why kuwabara valued him so much even though he kept pushing him away

kuwabara idolized and admired yusuke of course but i also think that he held himself to impossible standards by comparing himself to yusuke and kurama and hiei, and he had to prove himself and thats why he pushes himself so hard. he's already proven himself to yusuke by coming back every single day he's proven that he's strong enough and important enough to stand next to him and be his friend but i know kuwabara still feels like in his heart why can't i be better i try hard im a good person im just not strong enough. and maybe he thinks its because his good heart and his kind nature that he's not a vicious person like yusuke can be, like how in the dark tournament he wanted to save those guys from the doctor and let himself get beaten instead of killing them and winning. and i know yusuke respects kuwabara so much in that sense and he wishes he felt so strongly about somethjng(he does he just doesnt realize it's kuwabara until he's about to lose him lol)

they are the only constant in the show from the beginning, kuwabara has been with yusuke through everything to when he had become a demon and suddenly the world was flipped, and maybe he had been fighting for the wrong side- and maybe, he's bad now that he's a demon, and he should act like it. but kuwabara still smiles beaming at him because kuwabara knoows he's the same person and he knows how much is on his shoulders... i really do think that kuwabara is yusuke's tether to the human world/ human heart he grew up with because kuwabara knew him even before he was hit by the car kuwabara knew him when he was still just some little kid punk and he's been chasing him ever since then

kuwabara's loyalty to yusuke breaks my heart and then fixes it and breaks t because i think kuwabara never ever wants to address how he feels about yusuke despite knowing like since he met him he's head over heels for him LOL, i think he's already come to terms with the whole gay thing but the one thing he can't get over is if he says how important yusuke is directly to him, he's so scared that it will ruin their relationship. kuwabara probably feels so guilty and like a coward because he can't own up to his heart and be brave and tell yusuke... he's more scared of that than anyrthing else and he's perfectly content if he just stays yusuke's best friend for the rest of his life if it means he can at least be standing with him. yusuke meanwhile is like hole is hole but thats beside the point LFMOITOW yusuke i think has always been a social outcast and things like that aren't really important to him in the way that kuwabara values right and wrong... i think kuwabara feels like he's wrong for feeling like this when obviously yusuke doesn't feel like this or he'd take what he wants but i do think yusuke is emotionally constipated and the day he realized how important kuwa is to him is the mitarai fight epsode like idk 74/75/76? Wow yeah im just talking and not making sense i want to organize this all into an actual essay or something one day

tldr i really love kuwabara he's my favoirte in the world but in my mind im basically yusuke LOL so i dint put a lot of thought and i could write for hours and ive considered it.

also i could talk with YOU for hours because you get it

thinking about how when hiei kurama and kuwabara were trying to bust out of itsuki's interdimensional monster guy and kurama was like ok. itsuki we're going to torture you until you let us out. so we can fight sensui 4-v-1 kuwabara was so desperate to save yusuke that he was fine with both of these plans that he otherwise would have found so dishonorable he woulda died to avoid them. but not if it's for yusuke. and when sensui kills him anyway kuwabara's also fine with 3-v-1 if it means he gets to avenge yusuke, even if it means humanity basically gets wiped out because of it. kurama and hiei are the same, but it's kuwabara who most consistently risks his life by clinging to his honor code, and here is probably the one time he breaks it. bc he can't lose yusuke again. if he doesn't even know who he is without yusuke then how is he supposed to be the same guy with the stupid honor code? like that matters now. he can't be the bigger man if he's barely even a person without him. jeeeezzzzz

[insertdisc5]

Hi!! I wanted to ask, in celebration of Deltarune CH. 2, do you have any updated thoughts and head canons about the game?? Like, y'know, similar to a previous ask about Kris in your Deltarune tag? Thanks!

thoughts on kris part 2 i guess???? (part 1 from ch1 here lol)

spoilers for deltarune like woah. this wont be kris focused just random thoughts on everything. thank you for giving me the opportunity to talk

not that many thoughts for this chapter tbh! EDIT LOL: this was a lie i have a lot of thoughts

-just in general i feel like the player isn't the only one controlling kris... like yes the player forced kris to do what happened in the snowgrave route but AT THE SAME TIME idk it feels like there's someone else too. just because of the terrifying voice i suppose. and also the jerky movement kris does every time they get their soul out? unless there's another reason for it... maybe getting your soul out means you walk weird lol

-BUT ALSO i feel like kris is 100% in control when they create fountains. idk it just makes sense kris would create them. to create another world, a better world, A WORLD WHERE THEIR BROTHER IS HERE PERHAPS? i do wonder why they get their soul out then though. i'm all for it sweetie! do whatever! i support you!

-(i am and will be playing deltarune with only kris' best interests in mind. i will not hurt anyone unless kris wants me to. dont worry my little meow meow im on your side! talk to me! no? okay ill stay under the sink its fine)

-speaking of asriel. SUMMER VACATION COLLEGE WHEN? SUMMER VACATION COLLEGE WHEN? SUMMER (starts crying) V-VACATION COLLEGE WHEN

-kris misses their brother so much it's so sad. if you make kris steal 5$ from asriel they take it "reluctantly"? talking to asriel online so often even alphys knows?? the google search?? GOING INTO ASRIEL'S GOOGLE SEARCH ROOM WITH THEIR EYES CLOSED BECAUSE THEY'RE CONVINCED THEY ALREADY KNOW WHATS IN THERE? THAT ONE IS LESS OF A MISSING THING BUT IM LIKE OH MY GOD

-the city walk with susie at the end makes it clear to me that kris really values susie's friendship... kris even sits with her if you spend long enough near the lake like aaaaah ;_;

-and even in snowgrave you spend your last acts with the final boss calling for your friends like YES there's a way bigger creepy aspect to this (kris as more of a Leader who Commands and commands their subjects to come) but still :'0 (and then noelle answers oh my god noelle im so sorry for the trauma)

-berdly. listen. listen. listen. liste

-berdly sucks but [berdly hurts his arm in the battle against queen if you don't save him because he doesnt want to hurt you] [berdly realizing smg's wrong in snowgrave and immediately taking steps to save noelle] berdly is my little crumb nugget. i will protect him.

-noelle. noelle. girlboss!

-like ooooh listen. hearing about the genocide path for undertale. made me go "that is SO COOL. i HAVE to experience it myself this is great. hehehe killing time" and like no regrets. i was fully enjoying the experience knowing i was an awful person. SNOWGRAVE THOUGH. i will never try this myself its too fucked up. casually grooming your childhood friend to murder people <3 and also acting like a weird stalker towards her <3 stockholm syndrome speedrun i will get all the info i can about this but i will never do this myself

-people remarking the kris/player>noelle relationship is similar to the relationship between player>chara in genocide path is like yes. chefs kiss. don't worry we just are making you stronger and everything will be fine "you made me kill my friend? and for what?" this is fine sweetie don't worry about it!!!!!!

-like the amount of details added to snowgrave, like if you equip noelle's watch she notices later? and her battle animations change as time goes on, she gets an ice shield and stops sighing in relief after battle? oh my god? oh my god.

-(berdly is not awake.) JUST KILL ME RIGHT HERE I HAVEN'T STOPPED THINKING ABOUT BERDLY NOT BEING AWAKE!!!!!

-also why didnt he turn into dust. so many possible reasons. is magic a thing in the normal world and perhaps no magic means no dust (theres graves). maybe he isnt dead. maybe hes braindead. maybe he'll come back. either way that boy is now in the closet big enough to put someone in

-also dess' name probably being december AND THATS WHY NOELLE LOST THE SPELLING BEE?!?!??! FUCK ME UP!!!!! JUST FUCK ME UP!!!!!!! OH MY GOD!!!!!!

-also so many good pixel art this chapter. too many? i didnt need pixel art of cardboard noelle falling on the statue. like thank you but please. please it hurts my game artist brain.

-the expressions in this chapter were also top notch. all the unsettling noelle expressions like (i fall over face first)

-i threw away the ball of junk (which i already tried in ch1) and this time the game was like "ARE YOU SURE BC THIS IS A BAD IDEA" and kris felt bitter :'( (it deletes all your items in the dark world)

-i uh fucked up and skipped the susie+noelle scene bc listen last time ralsei mentionned seeing what susie is doing we missed some PRIMO LORE. turns out it just makes you skip the scene and you dont get anything new. welp

-speaking of ralsei well you know. he exists. but im stuck on him going "i just wonder what being ralsei-like even is...?" ralsei my dude there's so much i could say about this. do you feel like you can't be ralsei-like because you feel like you have to be asriel-like

-but also that makes no sense bc susie hasnt even mentioned ralsei looks like asriel. and i cant imagine asriel being so meek. so WHAT GIVES

-ralsei as kris’ “i wish i was a monster just like my bro and family and i’d look like asriel but with red horns [THE HALLOWEEN COSTUME] and my name would be something cool like ralsei instead of a boring human name like kris and im sweet and cute because thats how i act with asriel because ASRIEL MADE ME” theory because that would be cute.

-ASRIEL GOING TO THE CHURCH TO CONFESS HIS "SINS" WHEN "SINS" AREN'T A THING IN THE ANGEL BELIEF LIKE I KNOW THIS INTERACTION WAS TREATED AS A JOKE BUT WHAT THE FUCK ASRIEL?

-kris definitely has a connection with the big red door in the city, judging by what the kids say they probably went there... i feel like this place's dark world will be the Final Dungeon you KNOW some shit happened there. also the sounds you hear when you go there is the phone dark world call's sound slowed down? AND AFTER SNOWGRAVE APPARENTLY YOU CANT HEAR IT ANYMORE? HUWAH?

-speaking of songs the songs were all so good, My Castle Town rules, the berdly snowgrave music is stuck in my head, flashback is uwah wuahah, Until Next Time is so good, AND ALSO A FRIEND NOTICED THE DARK WORLD CITY THEME IS JUST tHE SONG 74 (MOST NOTICEABLE WITH THE SNOWGRAVE VERSION)?????? WHAT DOES IT MEAN????? it might be just "hey its just reuse" BUT MR FOX YOU KNOW WE'RE GONNA READ INTO THIS IS NOELLE THE ONE SINGING IDK BRO!!!!!!!!!!

-asgore dreemurr fired from the force what happun!!!!! game theory is that asgore is related to dess' death/disappearance but eh who knows

-you start the chapter at lvl2 and get to lvl3 after the final boss, a friend mentioned this is probably because we destroyed a world and im :0

-to go back to kris it's still so interesting to figure out who they are based on how they act/people mention them. like kris shaking the ferris wheel car? yeah makes sense i can imagine a pranking kid do this. kris' dance? yeah thats a little silly but i can buy it. doing cool anime poses? well i dunno this doesnt line up PERFECTLY but sure. BUT EVERYTHING THAT HAPPENS IN SNOWGRAVE... especially >proceed like that is such a weird thing that i can't imagine them doing, but i can't completely see the "player" doing either (compare with going to sans -which kris doesnt know- and going "SANS!" because of course the player would know sans), like THATS one of the reasons i feel like there's someone else in there. the weird robotic merciless actions. if im going super meta it feels like there'd be someone else like writing the choices into existence for us to pick you know? gaster probably? god i need to read more gaster theories i completely sidestepped the gaster shit bc i wasnt interested. anyway just spitballing

-(looks at big shot guy) please dont make him the next tumblr guy i beg you

-obligatory "queen was great" mention if only because this part made me laugh a little bit too hard

that was a lot. thank you for letting me talk

[shkspr]

hi. on your post where you may or may not have ended on 'moffat is either your angel or your devil' did you have maybe an elaboration on that somewhere that i could possibly hear about. i'm very much a capaldi era stan and i've never tried to defend the matt smith era even though it had delightful moments sometimes so i wonder where that puts me. i'd love to hear your perspective on moffat as a person with your political perspective. -nicole

hi ok sorry i took so long to respond to this but i dont think you know how LOADED this question is for me but i am so happy to elaborate on that for you. first a few grains of salt to flavor your understanding of the whole situation: a. im unfairly biased against moffat bc im a davies stan and a tennant stan; b. i still very much enjoy and appreciate moffat era who for many reasons; and c. i hate moffat on a personal level far more than i could ever hate his work.

the thing is that its all always gonna be a bit mixed up bc i have to say a bunch of seemingly contradictory things in a row. for instance, a few moffat episodes are some of my absolute favorites of the rtd era, AND the show went way downhill when moffat took over, AND the really good episodes he wrote during the rtd era contained the seeds of his destruction.

like i made that post about the empty child/the doctor dances and it holds true for blink and thats about it bc the girl in the fireplace and silence in the library/forest of the dead are good but not nearly on the same level, and despite the fact that i like them at least nominally, they are also great examples of everything i hate about moffat and how he approached dw as a whole.

basically. doctor who is about people. there are many things about moffats tenure as showrunner that i think are a step up from rtd era who! actual gay people, for one! but i think that can likely be attributed mostly to an evolving Society as opposed to something inherent to him and his work, seeing as rtd is literally gay, and the existence of queer characters in moffats work doesnt mean the existence of good queer characters (ill give him bill but thats it!)

i have a few Primary Grievances with moffat and how he ran dw. all of them are things that got better with capaldi, but didnt go away. they are as follows:

moffat projects his own god complex onto the doctor

rtd era who had a doctor with a god complex. you cant ever be the doctor and not have a god complex. the problem with moffats era specifically is that the god complex was constant and unrepentant and was seen as a fundamental personality trait of the doctor rather than a demon he has to fight. he has the Momence where you feel bad for him, the Momence where he shows his humility or whatever and youre reminded that he doesnt want to be the lonely god, but those are just. moments. in a story where the doctor thinks hes the main character. rtd era doctor was aware that he wasnt the main character. he had to be an authority sometimes and he had to be the loner and he had to be sad about it, but he ultimately understood that he was expendable in a narrative sense.

this is how you get lines like “were the thin fat gay married anglican marines, why would we need names as well?” from the same show that gave you the gut punch moment at the end of midnight when they realize that nobody asked the hostess for her name. and on the one hand, thats a small sticking point, but on the other hand, its just one small example of the simple disregard that moffat has for humanity.

incidentally, this is a huge part of why sherlock sucked so bad: moffats main characters are special bc theyre so much bigger and better than all the normal people, and thats his downfall as a showrunner. he thinks that his audience wants fucking sheldon cooper when what they want is people.

like, ok. think of how many fantastic rtd era eps are based in the scenario “what if the doctor wasnt there? what if he was just out of commission for a bit?” and how those eps are the heart of the show!! bc theyre about people being people!! the thing is that all of the rtd era companions would have died for the doctor but he understood and the story understood that it wasnt about him.

this is like. nine sending rose home to save her life and sacrifice his own vs clara literally metaphysically entwining her existence w the doctor. ten also sending rose with her family to save her life vs river being raised from infancy to be obsessed w the doctor and then falling in love w him. martha leaving bc she values herself enough to make that decision vs amy being treated like a piece of meat.

and this is simultaneously a great callback to when i said that moffats episodes during the rtd era sometimes had the same problems as his show running (bc girl in the fireplace reeks of this), and a great segue into the next grievance.

moffat hates women

he hates women so fucking much. g-d, does steven moffat ever hate women. holy shit, he hates women. especially normal human women who prioritize their normal human lives on an equal or higher level than the doctor. moffat hated rose bc she wasnt special by his standards. the empty child/the doctor dances is the nicest he ever treated her, and she really didnt do much in those eps beyond a fuck ton of flirting.

girl in the fireplace is another shining example of this. youve got rose (who once again has another man to keep her busy, bc moffat doesnt think shes good enough for the doctor) sidelined for no reason only to be saved by the doctor at the last second or whatever. and then youve got reinette, who is pretty and powerful and special!

its just. moffat thinks that the doctor is as shallow and selfish as he is. thats why he thinks the doctor would stay in one place with reinette and not with rose. bc moffat is shallow and sees himself in the doctor and doesnt think he should have to settle for someone boring and normal.

not to mention rose met the doctor as an adult and chose to stay with him whereas reinette is. hm. introduced to the doctor as a child and grows up obsessed with him.

does that sound familiar? it should! bc it is also true of amy and river. and all of them are treated as viable romantic pairings. bc the only women who deserve the doctor are the ones whose entire existence revolves around him. which includes clara as well.

genuinely i think that at least on some level, not even necessarily consciously, that bill was a lesbian in part bc capaldi was too old to appeal to mainstream shippers. like twelve/clara is still a thing but not as universally appealing as eleven/clara but i am just spitballing. but i think they weighed the pros and cons of appealing to the woke crowd over the het shippers and found that gay companion was more profitable. anyway the point is to segue into the next point, which is that moffat hates permanent consequences.

moffat hates permanent consequences

steven moffat does not know how to kill a character. honestly it feels like hes doing it on purpose after a certain point, like he knows he has this habit and hes trying to riff on it to meme his own shit, but it doesnt work. it isnt funny and it isnt harmless, its bad writing.

the end of the doctor dances is so poignant and so meaningful and so fucking good bc its just this once! everybody lives, just this once! and then he does p much the same thing in forest of the dead - this one i could forgive, bc i do think that preserving those peoples consciousnesses did something for the doctor as a character, it wasnt completely meaningless. but everything after that kinda was.

rory died so many times its like. get a hobby lol. amy died at least once iirc but it was all a dream or something. clara died and was erased from the doctors memory. river was in prison and also died. bill? died. all of them sugarcoated or undone or ignored by the narrative to the point of having effectively no impact on the story. the point of a major character death is that its supposed to have a point. and you could argue that a piece of art could be making a point with a pointless death, ie. to put perspective on it and remind you that bad shit just happens, but with moffat the underlying message is always “i can do whatever i want, nothing is permanent or has lasting impact ever.”

basically, with moffat, tragedy exists to be undone. and this was a really brilliant, really wonderful thing in the doctor dances specifically bc it was the doctor clearly having seen his fair share of tragedy that couldnt be helped, now looking on his One Win with pride and delight bc he doesnt get wins like this! and then moffat proceeded to give him the same win over and over and over and over. nobody is ever dead. nobody is ever unable to be saved. and if they are, really truly dead and/or gone, then thats okay bc moffat has decided that [insert mitigating factor here]*

*the mitigating factor is usually some sort of computerized database of souls.

i can hear the moffat stans falling over themselves to remind me that amy and rory definitely died, and they did - after a long and happy life together, they died of old age. i dont consider that a character death any more than any other character choosing to permanently leave the tardis.

and its not just character deaths either, its like, everything. the destruction of gallifrey? never mind lol! character development? scrapped! the same episode four times? lets give it a fifth try and hope nobody notices. bc he doesnt know how to not make the doctor either an omnipotent savior or a self-pitying failure.

it is in nature of doctor who, i believe, for the doctor to win most of the time. like, it wouldnt be a very good show if he didnt win most of the time. but it also wouldnt be a very good show if he won all of the time. my point is that moffats doctor wins too often, and when he doesnt win, it feels empty and hollow rather than genuinely humbling, and you know hes not gonna grow from it pretty much at all.

so like. again, i like all of doctor who i enjoy all of it very much. i just think that steven moffat is a bad show runner and a decent writer at times. and it is frustrating. and im not here to convince or convert anyone im just living my truth. thank you for listening.

[ohheyitsokay]

fear

pairing: Din Djarin (the Mandalorian) x reader

wordcount:2.6k

warnings: allusions to unhealthy views of relationships, angst with a happy ending? mostly fluffy, you guys know me by now

summary: you had always been told that power brought destruction. why wouldn’t you be afraid of the most powerful man you’d ever met? 

>>

“Wait, Mandalorian,” you called, voice trembling - but gratitude was more powerful than fear. He didn’t stop trudging through the outskirts of your little town, steady, as though he hadn’t heard you.

“Please,” you tried again, a touch annoyed that he was making you chase after him, and the warrior mercifully slowed to a stop. He did not turn around, he was not that polite, but his helmet did shift, and that was enough to give you the courage you needed.

You averted your eyes as you placed yourself in front of him, but stared at his knees with determination as you held out your arms, gift light in weight and heavy in value.

“I know you said you would not take extra payment, but you need this, and we will no accept no for an answer.” You had rehearsed the words with every step you’d taken towards his back, but still they came out unsteady.

“No,” he said, and you almost imagined laughter in his voice, but it was not mocking, and it pierced through your hesitation.

Sand ground against his feet as he went to move, and again under yours as you dug in your heels, venturing to look the mask full on.

“Please reconsider – it is a med kit with high quality bacta tools.” You tried to look as confident as you felt.

The Mandalorian's helmet tilted at you again, as he said, “What?”

Finally you had his full attention.

“My family, harvests from destroyed med droids sometimes, to get supplies, and we’ve got a lot of it saved up now.” Resolve was heavy in you, sinking your feet even deeper, willing you to stay in his way. “We owe you a great debt; this is a more honest gratitude than credits.” Something told you that your eyes had found his, through the T of his visor.

“If not for you, then for the little one,” you added, quieter, not that he couldn’t use it himself. After freeing your town more or less by accident, he was covered in scrapes and bruises in between the beskar. This gift was invaluable for bringing him back home in one piece.

Slowly, thoughtfully, he took it, his gloved hands surprisingly gentle. The air was suddenly awkward, and you worried briefly thay you had somehow insulted him.

“Thank you,” he said, and if you didn’t know better, his tone was almost bashful.

“Thank you,” you replied, smiling at him, before you remembered to be demure, and you ran off, heart racing.

His gaze might have followed you, if the hairs on the back of your neck were any indication, but you didn’t look back until you ducked into your building. The feeling returned – of meeting his eyes – and then he was turning away and you were alone.

You had your own home, made of smooth clay and filled with repurposed objects and materials. Chairs made from old racing bike seats and a bed full of scraps of fabric. You sunk into your favorite corner – your workbench and table. Piles of broken droid pieces were in a relatively organized pile nearby, and you grabbed one and began gently disassembling it. Soft clinks and the gentle squeaks of metal were music to your ears, even though you didn’t know anything about the mechanics, you loved the process of finding beautiful things in the chaos of wires and washers.

“Your family, huh?” the voice was low and amused, with a touch of something lighter, almost nervous?

The Mandalorian was at your door, curtain pushed aside to make room for his large frame. The grease stains on your hands became incredibly interesting as you shrugged, confused as to why he was here, in your home? Wasn’t he leaving not so long ago?

“I am my own family,” you tried to laugh, the awkwardness from before returning.

“Why are you… is there… do you need…?” you felt flustered, not wanting to offend him but trying to ask what in the world was happening.

“Would you want to come with me?” his words came out quickly, rushed and little too loud. Instinctively, you flinched, before even fully processing his question.

“What?” you looked more towards him, his movements seemed irritated as he looked away.

“I looked at the medkit and I don’t know half of what’s in it. I need some help anyway, with the kid, and,” he gestured noncommittally to the room and you understood.

“Okay,” you said. He was right, this was barely a home. And after all he’d done for the town, the least you could do was help him out for awhile.

For all he was covered head to toe, he still looked startled. But he nodded, curtly and walked back out the door.

You scrambled to shove your own stock of things into a bag and ran after him, feet thumping in the sand, mind racing.

-

Traveling with the Mandalorian was … not what you expected.

When he has first appeared in your town and you had beheld him, with his armor and weapons and swirling cape, you thought to yourself, this man is like a summer storm. Powerful, destructive, and beautiful from a distance. If you got to close you would be overwhelmed with him, his life, and there would be little room for survivors.

You were in awe of him, but afraid.

Apparently, not so afraid as to follow it, but you waited for it to hit you, tear your apart, and leave you in pieces.

You thought it would come on his next outing to find work, as his contact scoffed at your presence, but it didn’t.

Then maybe, it would come after the second mission, when it had come sooner than expected and you’d been there, improvising against his orders trying to keep you all alive. It didn’t then, either.

Long nights were spent, talking quietly, and you would show him how to use the creams and the sprays to heal himself, and you waited. The longer it took, the more sure you were that it was building, behind the armor, and he would grow sick of you, sick of your questions and touches and presence.

It was almost cruel, that you couldn’t find any evidence of it building, somewhere, anywhere. You had been told your whole life that a man like him would hurt you. You had even seen it, time and time again, and the images haunted you. It was unfair that you got all those wonderful moments with him first. Moments when he would get excited and eager and awkward at your kindness, or when he would open up with halting, thoughtful phrases, or when he would prioritize your safety, even over his own. Because how could you have those moments, and still survive when they were inevitably taken from you?

Maybe the waiting was the storm, because it was consuming you.

You found him in the cockpit, hating that you had a chair of your own to sink into.

“I think I should go home,” you whispered, fixing your gaze on the stars. He turned to look at you; you didn’t have to see it to know. The silence was loud and you felt the first tremble in your hands. Maybe asking would be the final straw?

“I don’t understand,” he said, carefully, and you heard the confusion in his voice and to your surprise, a touch of hurt.

“I…” you hadn’t prepared for this part. The words came more honestly than you intended, “I am afraid.”

Once, Din had seen a spaceship torn apart midflight. It cracked open at the same time as it caved in on itself.

That was how he felt, hearing those quite words, out of the mouth of his companion.

His voice was broken in a way that he could not blame on the helmet.

“Of me, cyar'ika?”

You took so long to answer, hope and fear pooled together blending in his chest. It was hard to think, hard to sit side by side suspended in the sky and to think.

“Of what you must be,” finally you admitted. A little more hope dripped in. Din thought he must be almost nothing. Other than his creed, and his role as the little ones buir, he could – would – be anything he wanted.

“What must I be?” he asked, and you seemed frustrated, like it was unfair that he didn’t already know.

“You are a warrior – strong and powerful and…” you swallowed, trying to sound matter-of-fact. “And those who are like that tire of those who are like me. And when you do, it will hurt.”

His gloved hands slid over the plates on his thighs, almost dancing with thought.

“Have I shown you that I tire of you?” he asked, and you had to close your eyes, searching, almost desperately, for a single time that he had.

Your “No,” was barely audible.

“That’s because I have not,” he answered almost as quietly. “I will not.”

The certainty, the fear, built up for years and years of warnings and reminders, was slipping through your fingers, and his hand was filling them. It sent a shock through you, but you didn’t push him away.

Suddenly you realized that you could’ve, that he would have let you – and another shock came.

Even through the glove, his hand was warm, and for the first time you allowed yourself to acknowledge to yourself that it was gentle.

“Are you tired of me?” he asked and the question sunk into your soul. He was the strongest man you’d ever met, capable of destroying everything in his path. He was holding your hand, asking for permission to keep you by his side.

This “No,” was louder, more resolute.

“Then this is your home,” he said, with even more determination. “And I will protect you.”

For the first time, you felt like you were seeing and hearing him clearly, fully. Not as you had been told to, but as he actually was. Even the unsaid words were clear.

The Mandalorian would not hurt you.

It would take time to unlearn, but you took a deep breath, and held onto his hand, and let a little bit of your fear go. It made room for something else, in your heart, something better.

Din felt it too, and his own resolve strengthened. He could show you – those people existed, but he, with you, would not be one of them. Even more than that, he wanted to be your comfort. It would take time, too, but now, at least he had that.

-

He didnt even need to say anything, only shoot you a look, and you knew. Under the helmet his face was surely as panicked as yours, and fast as a blaster shot you were on a bike, child tucked into your chest, racing away.

There had been local festival and you all had been excited after finishing a job, too intoxicated by the easy victory to remember the price it came with. You shouldn've known better - gotten out while you were ahead, but now that didnt matter because sharp, electric objects were flying past your head and wind was whipping in your hair and you were scared.

The Crest was barely within reach, you knew that, unable to stop desperately checking the fuel on the bike. The attacks were slowing and you tore your gaze up to look for Din, willing him to be close. It was getting cooler, both suns dipping towards the horizon and all you wanted to do was get out of range, get to the Crest, all safe.

You felt a prickle on the back of your neck, and before you registered that it wasn't warm and inviting, you were face to mask with someone as covered as the a man you wanted, but who was far, far worse.

Everything was a blur. There was sharp pain on your back and your thighs tensed, gripping the bike and the child and shooting your blaster for all you were worth. The ship was in sight, and then you were on it, and the door was closing and you hadn't been sure you were breathing but you couldnt start yet because it wasnt over.

Pain was radiating from your back and there was boom and bangs of fists and weapons on the shell of the ship and most importantly, Din was not back yet.

You blindly slapped a healing patch onto yourself before lowering yourself into the darkest corner of the ship, the child still close to your pounding heart. Your tried to focus on the sounds of the machines around you, tried to remind yourself that you had healing tools in case... in case he needed them. The thing about safe spaces is that they never overlapped with the ones that let you see what was going on, which only amplified your terror.

Maker, you didnt know why you were so scared but when you heard familiar footsteps and shining beskar came into view, the relief you felt was overwhelming. You breathed again.

It felt like there should have been a light show or a musical fanfare, how free you suddenly felt, it was a new and bizarre sensation but nothing... happened.

And then you realized.

"You are okay," he breathed, almost disbelieving, as the two of you stood, soaking in each other's miraculously living presence. There was a tightness to his posture, stress visible in his frame.

His breathing was ragged, cracking through the helmet, but he turned and out of habit you both moved away, remembering the danger just outside.

Your mind was racing as your forced yourself to set up everything properly, make sure the child was safely tucked away and the ship was secure and ready to fly. Feeling liftoff sent another wave of relief and shock through you, and your feet carried you up, up and around to the cockpit to find Din. By the time you reached him, the Crest was sailing through the stars, and the air in the cockpit matched that of before. Your hands had found the medkit you'd given him, all those months ago, updated by you regularly, and you held it out to him, almost in a trance.

Din took it before setting it aside, and turning to you. His arms opened, feeling suddenly vulnerable, in an action he'd never really done before.

You took his offer without hesitation, sinking into his arms, ignoring the rough edges of the beskar. It was one thing, to see him be gentle when it was a quiet night, and another entirely when intensity and his own fear and anger had been running high. It gave you the final note of bravery you needed to profess your realization.

"You make me feel safe, Din," you whispered into the cloth around his neck. One of his hands found the patch you'd put on, fingers barely tracing its edges.

"I do?" If possible, his voice was even more ragged than before.

You nodded, knowing he would feel it, and unable to say more.

After long, exposed moments, there was a shift and you both moved to sit in your respective chairs, not fully able to look at each other just yet. You wondered if his face felt as warm as yours did, or if he could feel the ghost of the shape of you, as his lingered on your skin.

The silence was comfortable, but still he asked, "Are you still afraid?" And you pondered the question, reflecting on all the little moments you had waited for the hurt to come, and it hadn't. The moments he protected you from them, as he had today.

"Less and less," you said eventually, relishing the honesty on your tongue.

Din reached over and took your hand again.

<<

Taglist:

@fangirl-316 @scribbledghost

[writebecauseyoucannotbreathe]

Ultimate Ship Meme: Azulaang

Rate the Ship -  

Awful | Ew | No pics pls | I’m not comfortable | Alright | I like it! | Got Pics? | Let’s do it! | Why is this not getting more attention?! | The OTP to rule all other OTPs

How long will they last? - Until I say so. I can see them being together after death as spirits.

How quickly did/will they fall in love? - Ooooh boy. Azula struggles to understand friendship. I think she'd fall in love fast and hard but take the longest to realize. Aang wouldn't let himself get attached at first because Azula is unapologetic and one of the things I like about Azulaang is how it would push Aang to deals with the nitty gritty gray, not in a The Fire Nation was right all along way but in how even Kyoshi and Roku's conflict resolution let to disagreements. I think it would take Aang longer to fall in but once they reach a semblance of common ground he'd be well aware he's falling in love and would enjoy the ride.

How was their first kiss? - Let's see my fanfics. In Blue it was awkward. In Weightless it was sweet. In Smut it was horny and hate filled. In canon I think their first kiss would be very passionate and then they snap back to reality and Aang would evade while Azula denies so they wouldn't talk about it but they'd for sure be thinking about the kiss.

Wedding:

Who proposed? - Technically Azula. As soon as Aang hears about a Fire Nation wedding, either his friends or he learns about Ozai and Ursa's wedding, his mind would be set on a wedding. He wouldn't say anything but he'd squirrel away relevant wedding information like he'd hear a song and go "I want that instrument to play at my wedding." But Azula would have her life planned out by other people and there'd be a set date where Ozai now Zuko are supposed to comb through suitor requests (it was probably Ursa's role. If she's there she'd talk to Azula directly instead of Lo and Li. I don't think Lo and Li are high enough rank to determine the suitor but I think it would be customary/expected for their input to be asked). Azula would tell Aang something along the lines of "I should be wed." and he'd agree and then Azula will spend an abnormally long time wondering if he married her because he liked her or because it's his duty until she asks him while he's discussing potential baby room colors pre wedding.

Who is the best man/men? - Sokka and Toph. Azula was going to pick Momo but he made a better flower girl. Yes she did this to annoy Zuko (and because Toph didnt want to wear the bridesmaid outfit) it's okay though Fire Lord Zuko was the guest of honor.

Who is the braid’s maid(s)? - Katara, Suki, Mai, Ty Lee. Mai pretends she hates the outfit but she's secretly pleased.

Who did the most planning? - Aang did the most thinking but Azula did the most planning.

Who stressed the most? - Externally Aang. Internally Azula.

How fancy was the ceremony? -

Back of a pickup truck | 2 | 3 | 4 | Normal Church Wedding | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | Kate and William wish they were this big.

100% Azula's fault. Aang has no clue what Fire Nation weddings are supposed to be like.

Aang: Wow I can't believe all weddings in your Nation are this big.

Azula: They're not. It's because I'm Royalty and you're the Avatar.

Though I hc that Aang wants to get married in all the different Nations and Azula secretly wants to experience a small wedding so they get married 3 more times with one of them being a very small Air Nation wedding.

Who was specifically not invited to the wedding? - Hmmm I'm not sure. On one hand, Ozai redemption. On the other hand, Ozai death.

Sex:

Who is on top? - Aang. Azula thinks she wants to be on top but she'd rather be pampered and Aang is more comfortable communicating and attending to needs. Aang has no strong preference either way and they do switch but this is their usual dynamic.

Who is the one to instigate things? - Azula but she denies it.

How healthy is their sex life? -

Barely touch themselves let alone each other | 2 | 3 | 4 | Once a couple weeks, nothing overboard | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | They are humping each other on the couch right now

I think it's up to the reader's preference but I can see them being very private (Azula) and naturally talented (Aang) to the point where they assume every couple has sex daily. Hc that Aang and Suki talk about sex freely (ex: When I do __ should I __ or do girls prefer ___? I can never tell with Azula. Why do guys do ___ after ____ ? I've tried asking Sokka but he doesn't give me a straight answer.) Much to the fear of Sokka and Azula.

How kinky are they? -

Straight missionary with the lights off | 2 | 3 | 4 | Might try some butt stuff and toys | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | Don’t go into the sex dungeon without a horse’s head

Again up to the reader. They both like learning new things and are prodigies so I think they'd end up reading about things to try in bed (Azula) and would try things out to see what they like (Aang) until they learn what they and each other generally like/dislike.

How long do they normally last? - 

Does the Avatar State remove your refractory period? >;3c

Do they make sure each person gets an equal amount of orgasms? - No. Aang likes overstimulating.

How rough are they in bed? -

Softer than a butterfly on the back of a bunny | 2 | 3 | 4 | The bed’s shaking and squeaking every time | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | Their dirty talk is so vulgar it’d make Dwayne Johnson blush. Also, the wall’s so weak it could collapse the next time they do it.

Neither can dirty talk. Azula is rougher. Aang likes to take it slow. She sets the pace in the beginning but he decides when it ends.

How much cuddling/snuggling do they do? -

No touching after sex | 2 | 3 | 4 | A little spooning at night, or on the couch, but not in public | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | They snuggle and kiss more often than a teen couple on their fifth date to a pillow factory.

Azula refuses to cuddle in public but in return they cuddle all night.

Children:

How many children will they have naturally? - hc them having twin boys at first with one firebender and one airbender because poetry. But Azula really wants a girl so they have a third child she is an airbender with Aang's charm and knack for getting in trouble and Azula's ruthlessness. Amon kidnaps her and instead of easily escaping (Aang's genes) she instead viciously mocks him the way only a preteen can (Azula's genes.) It's traumatic enough for Amon even before the parents show up. Then Aang wants another one and Azula wants another firebender so they do the do and surprise triplets! (maybe it has to do with ejaculatimg in the Avatar State lol) So 6 in total and lets say its 3 boys 3 girls with 3 airbenders 3 firebenders.

How many children will they adopt? - None. Azula is wary of motherhood and I know people like to hc Aang as adopting and while I can see him acting as a father figure to several kids I think he'd greatly prefer biological kids especially airbenders. It's a flaw that was barely touched upon and def not handled well in Legend of Korra.

Who gets stuck with the most diapers? - Servants or Aang. After a kid or two Azula would be comfortable enough to change the diapers but it would still be mostly Aang.

Who is the stricter parent? - Depends on the kid. Aang is more lenient with airbenders and Azula with firebenders or girls. I can see Azula being strict with training & studies but not with sharing whereas Aang would have less rules but they'd be more heavily enforced (ex: no airgliding without supervision until you've mastered the safety course)

Who stops the kid(s) from doing dangerous stunts after school? - Azula. She's pretty lenient with the term dangerous esp. when it comes to firebending as long as basic safety measures are applied (ex: you can pracrice lightning as long as it's not pointed towards yourself aka dont be Zuzu) but Aang is of the mindset "How are you gonna learn airbending without dangerous stunts?" And after the first few incidents she started stepping in.

Who remembers to pack the lunch(es)? - Azula but Aang cooks them.

Who is the more loved parent? - Appa

Who is more likely to attend the PTA meetings? Azula. When Aang attends the teachers shower him and his kids with compliments ("You're doing so well teaching your kids the values of the Air Nomads. It must be so hard being The Last Airbender"). They do the same with Azula but unlike Aang she sees through it and manages to get an accurate assessment of how their kids are doing.

Who cried the most at graduation? - Aang was more happy than sad. Azula cried before and after.

Who is more likely to bail the child(ren) out of trouble with the law? - Aang. He is a notorious lawbreaker. Azula would bail the kids and she could do so quicker than Aang in a few cases because of her connections but she'd be mad so their kids would rather call Aang or break themselves out.

Cooking: 

Who does the most cooking? - Tied. Aang at first but then Azula wants to learn and after Aang teaches her since she has less experience she finds more enjoyment in cooking.

Who is the most picky in their food choice? - 

Technically Aang since he's a vegetarian. Azula hasn't tried as many foods and she's used to not making a fuss at the family dinner table to the point of which Aang notices.

Who does the grocery shopping? - Both. Aang has a better eye for vegetables/fruits and Azula is better with prices (it's not about the cost it's about the value).

How often do they bake desserts? - Aang bakes them when he can/weekly. They're fruit based so if Azula doesn't want dessert he gives it to Momo or flings it at a target.

Are they more of a meat lover or a salad eater? - Gee I wonder. Aang eats salad Azula eats meat.

Who is more likely to surprise the other(s) with an anniversary dinner? - Aang but Azula tends to figures it out. Azula is more likely to plan a dinner but she wouldn't make it a surprise.

Who is more likely to suggest going out? - Aang but Azula is a close second. It would be a tie if it wasn't for the bathhouse.

Who is more likely to burn the house down accidently while cooking? - Accidentally? Aang. On purpose? Azula.

Who cleans the room? - Servants or Aang.

Chores: 

Who is really against chores? - Azula hates cleaning up but she's neater.

Who cleans up after the pets? - Aang.

Who is more likely to sweep everything under the rug? - Aang.

Who stresses the most when guests are coming over? - Azula.

Who found a dollar between the couch cushions while cleaning? - Aang.

Who takes the longer showers/baths? - Azula. In the Fire Nation Palace Aang has taken to chatting with Azula in the Royal Spa while he feeds her (and mostly himself) cherries.

Misc:

Who takes the dog Appa out for a walk? - Aang

How often do they decorate the room/house for the holidays? - Never. Once they like the room they like the room. If its an event they'll go to a different location for it or leave the Air Temple as is.

What are their goals for the relationship? -

To stay together.

Who is most likely to sleep till noon? -

Aang slept for a hundred years so I'll give it to him.

Who plays the most pranks? - Tie. They've both pulled elaborate pranks as kids.

[imagineabrighterworld]

Nothin’ On You // Sero x Shy!Reader

A/N: Kinda long! But I owe Sero for taking so long on finishing this! Hope you like it! ^^

The first time you meet is for a school project

In middle school he was the cool guy that got along with pretty much everyone. At first you would hide away, which was easy with a quirk like yours. You would turn translucent and mute according to your mood, so every time you tried to muster up the courage to talk to him when he passed you by in the halls, you would completely disappear. It was a game of chance to see who was paired with who when the fated project came up, but when you were paired with Sero you almost entirely disappeared off of the face of the earth. You begin to wonder if you could escape class without being noticed when he makes his way over and plops down in the seat next to you.

"Name's Hanta Sero, what's yours?"

Your face flushes, body turning translucent for a split second before you take his hand and shake it. "It's..." Your voice fails you. Of course it had to happen now. Your quirk just had to be a two-in-one kind of deal.

Lifting a finger, you scribble your name down on a loose piece of paper and offer it to him.

He looks at the scrap of paper with curiosity. “Cute name.” He looks back to you. “Is that your quirk? The..?” He motions to his body and mouth.

You nod sagely.

He beams. "Nice to meet you."

The tension in your shoulders lessen. Grabbing your textbook and one of your notebooks made for this type of situation, you write down several questions before pointing to the textbook pages.

He reads each message, surprisingly more patient with your quirk than others. Some expected you to push past it or get over your shyness, but he went with it. It made you feel.. valid. Like your quirk wasn't a burden.

“Sounds like we'll be having a few all nighters on this one, Mr. Takeshi expects waaay too much of us if he wants this done in a week.” Sero looks at you curiously. “What do you think? We could do it at one of those 24/7 cafes nearby.”

Feeling yourself relaxing, you realize you've returned to being opaque as you nod in agreement. "Sounds like a plan."

His smile brightens. "Hey, your voice is pretty cute too chica!"

This time you're glad you disappear from sight, hands covering your mouth as he laughs heartily.  

The project was an odd success

After your initial shock and shyness of being paired up with Sero, you both were a rather successful couple when it came to academics. You split the work equally and helped each other when either of you needed it. While he wasn't always the brightest, he always managed to put a smile on your face when you were studying long into the night, when your eyelids grew too heavy and your will to study lessened. When the day of the presentation came and you both took to the front of the class, it was his support that kept you from disappearing out of fright. However, now that it was over, you were surprised he still wanted to hang out with you, even if it wasn't required anymore.

“Oi, chiquita bonita! Over here!” Sero waves to you from across the classroom. He was sitting in his normal spot with his usual clique, and normally you didn't mix with them. They seemed nice, but it was always awkward when you joined him. You felt like they only tolerated you because of him.

Gathering your items, you shuffle out of your desk space and join him, blushing slightly as he scoots his seat to the side to make space for you right next to him. You could feel the burning stares of the girls surrounding him. You held on though, focusing on staying opaque, knowing he would try getting to the bottom of why you were nervous. Oh if only he knew how hated you were by his clique of girls.

“We did pretty good on the presentation didn't we?” He asks while draping an arm across the back of your chair, his body completely at ease. “Even the cabrón was impressed.”

You smack him lightly on the back of his head. You didn't know a lot of spanish, if at all, but you picked up some slang from the boy next to you. “Don't be mean Hanta, he's not all that bad.”

The girls’ hiss at your action, but Sero only laughs and tugs you closer under his arm. “Lo siento cariño. I'm sorry, but it's not my fault he has a stick up there.” He gestures upward with his middle finger.

You knew if you tried speaking, your voice would have fizzled out like a drop of water on a hot stove.

After the project you two were nearly inseparable, everyone knew you and Sero were an item (even if you both didn't see it)

“Dios mio! What did we do to earn this princesa?”

You turn around to the source of the voice, pausing on decorating the stage of the auditorium. It was Sero, you could tell immediately by his voice, but what you didn't understand was the context of his words. What was he talking about?

The confusion must have shown on your face as he moves closer and climbs onto the stage, walking up to you until he was by your side. “You're all dolled up. What's the occasion?” He holds you by the shoulders and peers behind you as well, earning a pinch on his cheek.

“It's the dance this week, remember? But the play is before, so we have to set up so it's all ready for the night. That means dress rehearsals too.” You were a part of the theatre group, an odd choice for someone who disappears when they get stage fright, but you were heavily invested in what you did. It was a passion you indulged.

“Aye, yeah I forgot about that.” Sero rubs his neck and looks at the ground, deep in thought. At least for two minutes. After the two minutes he peeks at you with a mischievous grin. ”Wanna go to the dance with me?”

To your credit, you manage to stay opaque while your heart beats wildly in its cage. “Thats a dumb way of asking me out.” You mutter while sliding down from the stage, nearly cutting yourself on one of the loose planks.

“¡Cuidado!” He holds his arms out, ready to help you down. “I don't want my date to get hurt you know?”

“I can still dance in a cast.” You brush off his concern with a rare smile. Crushes aside, you appreciated his friendship and concern.

“The fuck is this, Romeo and Juliet? Get a room!” A classmate yells from the lighting stage, laughing when you flip them the bird.

Sero joins in the laughter, leaving soon after apologizing to your classmate. Said classmate meets you in front of the stage, arms crossed and looking back and forth between you and the now closed auditorium door.

“So are you guys dating now?”

“No, we're just friends.” You rub your neck, feeling the translucency crawl up your neck. But it couldn't wipe away the smile on your face.

You gravitate towards each other

Stretching your arms in front of you, you twist your body to the right and sigh as you feel a pop. You didn't particularly like gym class but it was nice to get a good stretch.

Looking around at the field in front of you, you wave at the occasional friendly face. You had friends in this class, which made it even more bearable.

"Hola princesa!"

Sero?

Turning around you grin at the familiar face. You run to the fence blocking you in, gripping it as you watch your friend run to you. He holds your hand through the fence, a normal occurance and a habit you've grown fond of.

"What are you doing here?" You question while turning your hand in order to squeeze his, heart fluttering when you see the small tinge of pink on his cheeks.

"Just here to say hi. My next class is in E block." He peers over your shoulder. You were about the same height, somewhere around 5'4, so you relished being able to see him eye to eye (mostly) while it lasted. He grew a bit over the break of your first year. "Playing anything?"

"Volleyball." You shiver. "I'm team captain, but I suck at it." Who would you pick? Would you actually be a good leader? You feel your voice leave you as you begin to rival that of an onion skin, growing more and more invisible.

A small pinch on the back of your hand pulls you back to reality. Sero waggles a finger, tisking at you. "Don't sweat it, you'll do great." He squeezes your hand before backing up, walking backwards as he heads to class. "Just breathe princesa!"

"Got it." You whisper to yourself, waving to him as you watch him enter the building across from you.

Sadly by the end of your second year, he had grown taller, leaving you craning your neck to look at him.

When he entered U.A. you still cheered him on

Graduating middle school was tough when you split off into different schools. You knew you would keep in contact, but it was so much harder to spend time together when you didnt attend the same schools. Still, with each video chat and phone call, with each text, you showered him with all your love and support. He wanted to be a hero, and you were happy to support him with that dream!

You: Saw you on the tv, you were amazing!

Sero: thanks 😙 still lost tho 😅😅😁😁

You: Yeaaah🤔 but you still looked really cool! Still, didn't realize you were strong enough to pull that Todoroki guy that way 🧐

Sero: Im just full of surprises princesa 😘

Sero mentioned you often to his friends

You were mentioned in at least one conversation a day, it didn't matter the context, you just sort of popped up. What could he say, he loved you! You were his go to for support and someone he truly valued. Plus you weren't crazy like his classmates. 

“You keep talking about her but we've never actually seen her.” Mina leans forward on her palm as she sips at her milk tea. “You're not lying about her are you?” She wiggles her eyebrows, eliciting a laugh from Sero. 

“Course she's real.” 

Kirishima lays his head on the table of the booth they were at, looking at Sero with confusion. “Got proof? It’s not manly to lie to your friends bro.” Sure he believed in his friend, but after a year of just hearing about a special girl, it was hard to keep believing without some form of proof. 

Sero holds up a finger as he pulls out his phone. Placing it flat on the table, he pushes the power button and watches his friends faces light up as they view his lock screen. It was a picture of you.

“Woah! Who's the hot chick?” Kaminari asks excitedly as he returns from the bathroom. “Is she single?”

Sero powers off his phone before smacking a piece of tape on his friend’s mouth, surprisingly feeling a twinge of anger at his words. You were his best friend! He had to protect you!

 On the inside he knew his anger was from deeper feelings, but for now it was just from the fact that he may need to defend your innocence from his own schoolmate. You were so shy, he knew Kaminari’s flirting would be too much for you.

“Yeah, no cabrón. She's taken.”

You were there for his graduation

Needless to say, you were at his graduation! It was difficult to find him amidst the crowds of families wanting to take pictures of their children and siblings, and even some heroes wanting to say their goodbyes! You were absolutely bombarded and neigh invisible after overthinking the whole thing, so when you finally found him you were stunned into invisibility when his friends jumped you. 

“Ohmygodohmygodit'sactuallyyouuuuuu!” Mina screams as she pulls you into her, squeezing the life out of you before you can get a breath out. 

The boys were much gentler, but just as excited. Especially Kaminari.

“Hey it’s the hot girl- more like the gone girl, what's happening?” He questions as you disappear from sight, your voice completely AWOL.

Sero smacks his face as he curses his friends out. “Chingues! Give my girl some space hijos de perras!” 

Mina gives you enough space to breathe but holds you much like one would a hostage. For a hero course student, you believed that she would have done very well as a villain. 

“Nope! We get to meet this girl of yours, Tape Boy!” She looks down at you, squinting to try making out where your face would be, unknowingly glaring directly at you. “He talks about you almost nonstop yet you haven't visited us at all, how unfair is that?” Mina grins. 

You come into focus, your voice a mere squeak as you brush some hair out of your face. “A little? I should've visited..” You introduce yourself to his cadre, your name stumbling off your lips. 

“Hot and shy? What a cutie!” Kaminari hugs you from your available side where Mina wasn't holding you in a headlock. 

A whip of tape smacks the blonde and sends him reeling back to Sero who holds him in a similar hold Mina was holding you.

Your friend ruffles Kaminari's hair in a somewhat violent manner, grinning at him with threatening eyes. "Go easy on her cabrón. She's not used to so many people doting on her."

They were doting on you? You tilt your head and look at Mina who was still examining you. "I don't think I deserve to be doted on, that's not what's going on here right?"

"Of course not, but you and I are gonna have some girl time while the boys get us a spot at a restaurant! You're gonna tell us all about how you and Tape Boy here met!" She chirps excitedly, pulling Bakugou in with her free arm as he tries escaping past her.

You feel a drop of sweat as you accept your fate, watching Bakugou attempt to wrangle his way to freedom. "Sure, sounds nice."

Sero made it rather big as a hero, see, he wasn't the strongest hero but he was very popular

He had always been popular, so it made sense to you when his ranking kept going up and up until he was in the high twenties. You knew he was good at what he did, being a source of smiles even in dark times, but it always brightened your day when you heard your coworkers mention him in passing. 

“Have you heard about the hero Cellophane yet?”

“Yeah! I think I saw him around yesterday. He was eating soba with Shoto.” 

You look backwards to see the faces of your junior coworkers. They were in a different department than you, but you enjoyed chatting with them every now and then. Mostly when it came to heroes as you had somewhat of an insiders look. 

Had you forgotten to mention you were friends with Sero- Cellophane? 

You debated whether to tell them over tea one day until you heard their next words.

“He’s kind of hot isn't he?”

... Maybe you would keep the secret to yourself. 

As a hero he makes time to drop into your life, sometimes randomly 

What else was to be said? Really?

A blur flashes by your face, causing you to yelp in shock, stepping back and nearly falling onto the unforgiving pavement. Luckily, said blur created a swing of tape just in time to catch you, pulling you forward and bringing you into his arms. 

“Lo siento mi corazón! I didn't mean to make you fall.”  Sero grins at you, his arm wrapped securely around your waist. He definitely meant to make you fall, you could see the mischief behind his eyes. 

“As if Hanta.” You pinch him on the cheek, a smile coming to your face when he whines. “Look I’m happy to see you but I've got to get to work on time today, no funny business.”

“No funny business?” He repeats after you, rubbing his chin in thought. “Then I guess I’ll have to escort you to make sure you get to work on time.” 

Your eyes widen as you feel his hold grow tighter and more secure as he holds you flush against him. Oh no. “Wait Sero-!” 

And just like that, you were in the air, swinging from building to building with him propelling you both forward. You attempt to scream at him but your voice is lost along the way as you hear the clicking of cameras. 

Oh god they were taking pictures.

“Niña don't worry! We’re almost there!”

 Luckily for you, you were never caught on camera. So your quirk did have some uses. 

The media was sure he had a partner 

The photos really ended up getting him in hot water as every interview he did, the topic of romance was brought up. Fans would notice he would avoid the topic of love, but on his social media he would constantly mention a girl. No one knew who this girl was, but fans and news stations were determined to wring it out of him. 

Once the red light of the on-air button was out, the reporter in front of Sero swiftly covers the mic pinned to her lapel and scoots to the edge of her seat. Sero watches in quiet amusement as the whole station becomes silent. Weird. But he knew why they grew quiet so fast. They wanted information, and if even the news anchor waiting for his time to come up stopped his boisterous laughter, it must've been important. 

“Off the record. Do you have a secret sweetheart stashed away somewhere Cellophane?”

Oh. This again. 

He stretches his arms in front of him as he runs through his normal excuses and dodges for this question. All still viable and working, but.. Maybe he could give a little hint. The media was on his ass about this after those photos were taken of him and his girl, so it was only right to clear the air right?

“Turn on the cameras. I’ll give this to you.”

You were crushed when he admitted he did have a sweetheart (of sorts) and even more so when the media suspected it to be the Stealth Hero: Invisible Girl

The media did end up getting a bit of info out of him  and when you heard about this special girl your heart couldn't help but crack under the thought of him distancing himself from you to be with her. You treasured your friendship with him, romantic or not, you didn't want it to end. Because of this fear, you are the one who starts to close yourself off.

“Chiquita, what's wrong?” Sero follows you as you make your way to the kitchen, a bowl of chocolate coated pretzels in your arms. “Are you sick? I can stop by the pharmacy for you.”

“N-No, its okay. I'm not sick..” You back up when you see his arm stretched outward, flinching when the back of his hand meets your forehead. 

He hums. “No fever.” 

You push past him, abandoning the bowl of chocolatey treats on the counter. You felt yourself becoming frustrated. Not with him, but with yourself. His opinion meant the world to you- he was your best friend! And you were letting this relationship of his get to you. How petty could you be? He did nothing wrong. In fact, you should be happy for him, finally dating his high school sweetheart.

But the thought of him dating Invisible Girl- the irony of him dating an invisible girl- was just too much for your heart to take at the moment. 

You had no way to take out this frustration. So it was reflected onto him. 

“Cariño-”

“Please!” You slam your hands on the counter, voice fading in and out as you hide your face in the collar of your turtleneck. “Please.. Just go.”

The apartment was quiet, filled with only your ragged breathing as you hold in your rampant emotions. When he leaves with a silent goodbye, you're unsure if the breaking sound surrounding you is just in your head or if something truly reached into you and tore your heart to pieces. 

He makes it very clear who that sweetheart is

Finally, he announces just who captured his heart. It was live on a jumbo screen, playing as you were out getting “groceries” for the nights dinner. 

The hollow feeling in your chest wasn't easing, and it definitely wasn't made any better when you saw the Stealth Hero on the television next to her team. Though your calves were certainly doing better with how much speed walking you would do when you passed by convenience stores with tabloids lining their windows, photos of Sero and Invisible Girl on the front. 

Work went by dreadfully slow, and lunch went by just as uneventfully as usual. You ignored the chatter of your coworkers, uninterested in what they had to say. 

After the report came out, no one was talking about the top heroes anymore. They all were focused on the potential lovers and what other secret admiring the heroes had in their ranks. If other heroes were hiding their own affairs. If the popular Cellophane could hide his romance, maybe someone like Deku or Shoto could be too. 

“We’re going out for drinks later, want to come with?” Your junior asks as she slings her purse strap over her shoulder. “Jin is paying~”

You respond with a polite smile. “No thanks. I’m going straight home.”

- - -

Going straight home was the plan, but in the end you had to make a quick trip to the nearest grocery store for dinner. Something quick, as you didn't have the energy to make something complicated. 

Which meant you ended up buying only instant ramen.

It was on your way back, crossing a busy sector when the sound of your friend on the jumbo screen caught your attention. 

“She's my corazón. Mi vida.” 

You look up at the screen, stopping in your tracks.

Sero was blushing, a shy smile on his face, but his eyes were lit up with joy. You heart pulses rapidly in your chest, a blush creeping up your cheeks. You had never seen him so flustered, it was always the other way around. 

“I’ve loved her since middle school. I never wanted to drag her into this, so I never confirmed her name- but its not Invisible Girl!” He amends quickly, looking at the reporter with a knowing look. He wags his finger, his infamous cocky smile replacing the twitterpated look from earlier. 

“Sure, she has a similar quirk, which is how those photos came to be.” He leans back in his chair. 

“You want to know her name right? I guess it wouldn't hurt to say. I’ve kept it hidden for so long, but here it is.”

And then he said it.

He said your name.

Looking directly at the screen, he smiles gently, eyes full of the warmth you've been craving ever since you were paired for that project years ago. 

“Ella es mi tesoro. She is my treasure.”

Extra: 

Racing home, you're not surprised when you find the lights on in your apartment. In fact, it only spurs you forward. 

Yanking open the unlocked door, you drop your groceries and launch yourself into Sero’s arms as he held them open for a hug. 

He was sweaty from rushing from the news station to your apartment, but neither of you were concerned about it as you laugh. You laugh at the tape still clinging to his clothes, you laugh at the ramen spilling out of your grocery bags, you laugh at your tears.

You laugh at how long it took for you both to finally admit how much you loved each other.

“Mi corazón.” He pulls back from the hug and cups your cheek, looking at you with love softened eyes. “I love you.”

Tears brim your eyes. 

You speak in the clearest voice you've ever spoken in. Skin bright and flushed pink. 

“I love you too.”

[words-for-holland]

Quarantine Series: Silence is Golden?

Pairing: Tom Holland X Reader

Summary: Tom and Y/N don’t get into a lot of fights, but this one will leave you speechless...literally.

Check the Rest: Burnt Out | A New Look | Secret Cuts & Kisses | Breaking Friendships |The Birthday Week | Movie Night

A/N: Hey! Did you know I created a Masterlist?! You can view here (X)!

Every couple has their good and bad days. Some people will even say it’s healthy to have a little dispute once and awhile. For Y/N and Tom, the bad days just kept on coming. Maybe it was due to the work piling up on Y/N’s plate lately, or the fact that Tom was stressing about going to Berlin in 2 weeks for his work. Either way, both of them were under pressure, and with everything going on, it’d be no surprise that even the smallest things would irritate them.

“Tom I told you to put your luggage off to the side. One of us is going to trip with all this shit in our room.” Y/N scolded as she pushed the black luggage to the side of wall.

Tom was sitting in bed, rolling his eyes at his fiance’s comment and went back to focusing on his script. “Well, maybe it wouldn’t be a big deal if you just cleaned the room every weekend like you were supposed to do.” He grumbled as he highlighted his lines.

“I was working the entire weekend. I told you I had a huge release to prep for and last time I rememebered I’m your fiance not your maid. It wouldn’t kill if you could just do some of the chores in the house instead of having me, Harry, Harrison, or Tuwaine do it for you.” She argued, glaring down at Tom with her arms crossed. “Just cause your some hot shot celebrity doesn’t mean you can just sit there and do jack shit.”

Tom looked at her with surprise and anger. He just about had it up to here with her nagging. Tom loves Y/N, but sometimes, like tonight, she was really getting on his nerves, and the next few things he says to her were not so pretty. “Can you just shut up?! You’re always telling me what to do, what not to do, to stop doing this and stop doing that, and god the never-ending chatter that comes out of your mouth.” He spits out not even paying attention to how Y/N was reacting. “Some people actually do prefer some peace and quiet. God, I really can’t wait to go to Berlin just so I don’t have to hear that god awful nagging of yours.” Tom shakes his head as he looks back at his script, until he realized what just came out of his mouth...complete and utter bullshit that he didn’t mean.

It was Y/N’s turn to be surprised. In fact she was speechless, not really knowing what to say to his rant. It hurt a lot, as if her heart had just broken in a million pieces. If there was one thing you needed to know about Y/N, it was that she valued everyone’s view and opinion of her. So, you can best believe that if someone had a problem with her, she would not take it lightly. When it comes from the person you love the most...well...one can’t even begin to fathom how much it could hurt.

Tears were forming and streaming down her eyes, as small sniffles start to escape. Her tiny hands balling up into a fist. She wasn’t just upset, she was furious. “Well, if thats how you feel then, I don’t know why you’d want to be with a person that doesn’t shut up...Cause clearly I’m not good enough.”

Tom starts to sit up on the bed and lean towards her, trying to apologize profusely, but it was a lost cause that couldn’t be taken back. She runs out of the room with her stuff as she moves to the guest room to cry herself to sleep. Tom stays in their bedroom as he looks up at the ceiling with a disappointed face. “What have I done?” He whispers to himself, only praying they would be able to make up in the morning.

The next day, Tom wakes up extra early to prepare a ‘Sorry I’m such a div. Please forgive me’ breakfast with chocholate chip pancakes, bluerberry smoothies, and apple turnovers from her favorite coffeshop in London. And if that wasn’t enough...he had also brought her a bouquet of red roses. He awaited for her to come down, with everything set. As the boys came by to eat their share of the breakfast, Y/N comes down to akward silence. Everyone staring at her and Tom standing in the middle smiling with flowers in hand.

“Morning Y/N.” The boys say in unison.

“Morning boys...Tom.” Y/N mumbes the last word as she makes her way. They continue to talk and eat amongst themselves as Y/N looks for a seat to sit at, but sadly the only one available is the one next to Tom. He looks at her with his brown puppy dog eyes, silently pleading for her to sit next to him. Y/N gets the message as she rolls her eyes, and tales the seat. He present her the flowers once again, smiling off his boyish charm. “Darling, Im so sorry for the way I acted I didn’t mean it. Please don’t be mad at me. I love you so much.”

Y/N takes the flowers and nods, as she goes back to her breakfast. She ate rather quickly as to make sure she didnt have to deal with anyone and went straight back to the guest room. Tom slouches in his seat, sighing in defeat. “Great the silent treatment.” He says out loud.

“Damn, Tom you must have really fucked up.” Tuwaine said as he took a bite of his pancakes.

“Yeah mate, what did you do?” Harrison asked, intrigued by his best friend’s dilemma.

“You couldn’t hear them? They fought because Tom couldnt do a simple job and then called Y/N a talkative nagging piece of work” Harry answered him, stifiling a laugh. “Im sure the whole world could have heard him.”

“You also forgot, how he said he’d rather be in Berlin than be here with her.” Tuwain mentioned.

Tom glares at his younger brother and Tuwaine, giving them a good shove on the shoulder. “Hey, don’t be mad at me. I’m not the one that had to get his shit together.” Harry defends taking his last bite.

“What do I do? She wont even talk to me and I went through all this work to apologize to her.” Tom asks as he stares at the floor solemnly. “I don’t want her to be mad at me.”

“I don’t know mate. Maybe just earn her trust again. Im sure youll both work it out...you always do.” Harrison reassures him as he makes his way to wash the dishes.

Later that night, Tom passes by Y/N as she makes her way to the bathroom across their bedroom. Tom tried his best to set up the bed as if she was staying with him, fluffing the pillows, pulking down the comforters, and turning up the AC. As Y/N finishes up, she sees him standing at the edge of the bed, waiting for her to join him. “Please? I cleaned up the room and gave you your favorite pillow because you know you cant sleep without it.” He pleads, pouting with his lower lip sticking up.

Y/N looks at the tidy room and the pillow he left her. She smiles when she takes notice of the the one pillow with flowers and ripped edges. It was her favorite pillow since she was 5 and sworn to everyone that it was the only pillowcase she could ever sleep peacefully in. With the thought and gesture Tom made today, Y/N figured it was the least she could do, though it didn’t mean he was forgiven compeltely yet. Tom smiles at his first victory as he climbs in the bed with her. He tries to snuggle closer and wrap his stron arm across her waist, whispering “I love you and I really am sorry.”

Y/N wasn’t too comfortable getting this close still, and ultimately took his hand that was on her waist and dropped it to his side. Tom, felt a slight hinge of sadness when she did that. She never refused his cuddles and anytime they had a fight they would always make up before rhe end of the day. He sighs loudly in silence. Y/N turns around to face his back, and leans over to give him a quick kiss on the cheek, which takes him by surprise. “I love you” she whispers, going back to her side of the bed.

The next day, Tom decides to take a quick trip to his parents house, who greet him with ipen arms. Though, both his parents, Paddy and Sam, notice the distress on his face. “What’s wrong son?” Tom’s mum asked with worry.

“Mum, Dad...I messed up.” He cries. “ I was just really stressed out this past week, with the movie, and the fans, and thinking about how I have to leave Y/N for Berlin...I-I- just said a lot of stupid things to her that I didnt mean.”

Tom’s mom rubs her son’s back as she tries to console him and calm his breathing. “There. There. Its going to be okay. You know Y/N loves you so much. Im sure you’ll both get through this.”

“That’s the thing mum. I don’t know if we can. She won’t even talk to me. I made her breakfast gave her flowers and even cleaned our room liek she asked me too. I don’t know what else to do to show her that I truly sorry.I told her I can’t wait to go to Berlin so I did have to hear her talk, but thats far from the truth. I don’t want to leave her when we’ve had all this time together.”

“Hmm...perhaps you should do the things that she doesn’t ask you to do. You know Y/N is also stressed with her job as well, she might not have time to get around to all the things that need to be done. Also tell her how you really feel besides that you’re sorry and you love her. You know both of you have had a hard week and there’s a lot of feelings bottled up inside. Just be honest with your feelings. I know you didn’t mean it and Im sure she knows too.”

Tom smiles at the last sentence, realizing the two haven’t really committed to the rules they promised each other, be honest and communicate with each other. “You’re right, Mum. I cant even remember the last time we really talked.” Tom got up up quickly whiping away the dry tears. “I’m gonna go make things right with Y/N. Thank you for everything. I love you.” Tom hugs his mother, before he makes his way ready to set things right.

As he pulls up to the house, Tom is ince again by the door with flowers in hand. Y/N sliently looks at him as she tilts her head curious as to why he’s on his toes...and with more flowers in hand. “Look you don’t have to say anything because I’m gonna be doing all the talking right now.”

Y/N looks at him in surprise, intrigued to hear what he has to say this time. “Y/N. Im know. im such a dumbass, clueless, and careless bloke who didn’t stop to think about your feelings and the things you wanted from me. I should have helped around more, I should asked how you were , and I definitely should have pushed my luggage to the side of the wall like you asked me too many times.” He says chuckling nervously. “And I know I fucked up, but Im really going to to try to make it an effort to listen more, and help you as much as I can. And Im so sorry for being so distant, I just I had a lot on my mind and the fact that I have to leave you, in two weeks when this has been the longest we’ve spent time together, it made me more sad.” Y/N looks at him with a sympathetic smile, almost ready to accept his apology. “So look, I know you’re probably still mad and everything, but Im really hoping this makes it up for you because I really do love you. Every single thing about you and theres only two more weeks before I leave and I want to spend every day, hour, minute, and second with you.”

There’s silence in the air as Tom looks into her eyes, trying to find some answer. “Every day, hour, minute, and second?” She questions him smiling. Tom’s face lights up with the brightest smile hes ever out on. He drops the flowers and hugs her even more tightly than he did with his mother, spinning her around. Nothing sounded better than hearing her laugh, it’s been far too long. He cups her face, kissing her passionately only to pull away and move the stray hairs from her face. Taking in every single detail of her face. “Yes. Ever day, hour, minute, and second..so lets not waste anymore time.” He grabs her hand as he rushed her to their room.

“Wait, wait, wait!” She yells with laughter. Tom sulks and groans, “Aw, what now?”

“You didnt even ask if I forgave you, yet?”

“Well...” Tom says pretending to think “Do you forgive me?”

Y/N looks at him, leaving a chaste kiss on his lips. “Of course I do.”

“Good. Now let’s go. Got to show you how much I appreciate and love you.” Tom smiles as he pulls her away.

Taglist:

@hollanddolanfangirl @parkerspillow @joyleenl @kihyunwifes

[ccsthemovie2]

(I think it's a word over 500, but:)

"Speaking of Tsukishiro, how's he doing?", Eriol asks. Frying pan to fire to volcano.

"He's good," Touya says quickly, before Sakura can say anything. Yukito is not even in the ballpark of "good". Yesterday he called Touya and begged him to bike over and said it was important and when Touya showed up he was asleep, and stayed fast asleep right through to the next morning. He keeps trying to make appointments with doctors, and then falling asleep before he can call, or, when Touya calls for him, before he can make it out the door. Privately, Touya isn't sure how much good a doctor can do for him, but anything has to be better than this, right?

"Really? I'm glad to hear it." Ugh, how much has Sakura told him. Not that she doesn't have a right to talk to her friends, but, come on, would it kill her to least keep it between her and Tomoyo and the funny looking cat.

He's good, that's an obvious lie. Ruby has said Yukito could barely stand upright at school. Every inch of Touya Kinomoto is packed full of magic. Sooner or later, Eriol figures, either Sakura will be powerful enough to sustain him, or Yue will have to get over himself and just eat already. Touya can't actually do anything with his magic, so it's not like Yue, even weak as he is, will have to face much of a struggle to take it. (Aside from competition with Ruby, of course. There's something to that, right, articles and studies about animals being healthier if they need a bit of careful planning to get their food? Yes, so this works out nicely.)

Or maybe- oh, that's probably it. Yue's on to him, isn't he? He's just being stubborn as usual, figuring sooner or later Clow will appear via Eriol and save him. He can imagine how surprised, overjoyed, grateful Yue would be, if Eriol showed up and saved his life. He can imagine Yue's head resting on his neck as clearly as if he had kept Yue well-fed with magic a thousand times in his lifetime. It would be nice, in the short run, but it wouldn't be right, no. Clow is dead, and Yue needs to learn to live with that. If he knows what's good for him, he will take responsibility for his own life, and if he doesn't...

Ahh, well, maybe it's Clow's old sentimentality, maybe Eriol is just warming up to Sakura's moon guardian all on his own, but he can't bring himself around to the idea of letting Yue just die. He'd save him, if it came down to it. But, he tells himself sternly, only as an absolute last resort. He's just worrying because he misses Yue and wants to get to know him better all at once in that past-and-future way- it's worth a visit, soon. Yes, a nice little visit, and Yue will never even have to know it happened. Just to check in.

(sorry the formatting got weird when i copypasted lol!)

hiiii thanks for the ask!!!

if we talk about this convo we need to back up and talk about how it got here. this should give you some idea of how badly this needs to be under a cut for length lol.

so it all starts with the bit about how someone falling and being caught is something that happens a lot in ccs. how with eriol, it's purposeful, and with fujitaka (and i misremembered it but since found out she fell *on* him and not *caught* by him, which lolol i hope he broke a bone, but also its fine the fic's already marked canon divergent, or maybe the story gets misremembered, whatever, in any case), it's an echo of clowriol's intentional artificial-trustbuild-dangersaves but without the magic or purpose to back it up (just like fujitaka himself!), but it's a situation he quickly makes favorable to him, because it may be a blank slate but it's made of the same material.

this whole convo was part of one of the very first chunks written, but everything was going to go in a very different direction at first. (there's a lot of Cut Content from this fic, some that i just didn't like, some that wasn't connectable with the rest of the fic after it took the shape it took but might pop up somewhere else one day idk). in this particular bit i cut the later half of the conversation because i really didn't like what i'd written, but then even though the direction of the story changed the conversation was still going so it had to bounce somewhere else, so it bounced to yukito. here we are answering your ask 2 paragraphs in!

yukito, iirc in the anime, did catch her from a fall, (in the manga, which made way more sense for why she had to change her clothes and rest so much, he saved her from drowning, again iirc because who can trust a memory) and at a point where eriol still has some investment in making yuekito/sakura (ewwwww) happen, he's going to try and draw on that symbolism to nudge her in that direction, right?

so all this said, SPEAKING of yuekito. how are they doing.

bad, obviously. touya's freaking out. i imagine that part of what's stopping yukito from seeing a doctor is yue, though- he knows it wont help, and i dont think yukito has, like, person insides that will stand up to medical tests, and yue would pick up on yukito like, not wanting to be outed to the doctor as a magic construct because he, like, doesnt actually have a real heart that pulses, just a repeating heartbeat sound. doesn't for real have blood etc to test, just records of blood type (for personality reasons).

and also touya's a very like keep-ur-problems-not-everybodys-business type so hes like imagining sakura venting her fears to this weirdo and getting pissed off. but that didnt actually happen, eriol knew all on his own lolol. touya you have to say something nice should happen to sakura to make up for wrongly suspecting her now

and this bit on eriol's end is all wrong information and inaccurate conclusions and i was really worried ppl would take it at face value but i hope nobody did. in ccs we get moments where eriol wants sakura to take power, or to learn that power can be taken- his final battle with her, for example, where the answer to his light and dark puzzle is to use kero and yue's power, except that's not something she would ever Want to do or would even Occur to her to try. the power is gifted to her by kero and yue (and syaoran!) because they love her.

same concept, here- the answer to the 'yue is dying' puzzle is to eat touya's power, and he can't imagine the real reason why he won't just do that, and when he thinks about it too long it goes right to his ego- yue looovvvvesss clow, and by extension me. he wants meeeeeee to save him. he wants to neck kissy MY magic soo sooooo bad. but yue isn't considering any of that at all. he's thinking about yukito and what touya means to yukito and why that would make yukito hesitate to reach out, and that no way in hell will he just ambush his other self's crush down a dark alley and take his magic, even to save both their lives. he's a lot more selfless than clow and eriol ever realize. maybe- this is just a half formed thought right now, i dont know if im like certain about it, but- maybe they feel his devotion to clow was a form of selfishness, that he Wanted Love as a thing he could hold and own, whereas pretty much everybody else who meets him goes like YOU SELFLESS MAN YOU CANT JUST DIE FOR PPL YOU CARE ABOUT YOU GOTTA TAKE CARE OF YOURSELF TOOOO

and there’s also that bit of teacherliness intrinsic to the three of them again: im doing this to teach him a lesson. im letting ruby do her thing without telling her what’s going on to help and encourage yue, etc.

anyway, that (in terms of fic weaving itself into canon) solidifies his decision to do uhmmmm a thing that creeps me out real bad in the anime (knocking yue out to have a moment with him, and oh, ding, there's another 'you fell but i caught you' moment!). eriol loves this manner of hanging out with people, you see it later in this fic, even:

It's important to say what's in your heart to the people you want to say it to, even if you have to make sure the other person never hears it. It's important for your own emotional freedom.

he loves to spend time with people exclusively on his terms, to the point where the other party never even knew he was there, because he knocked them out, or because he was just staring creepily at the outside of sakura's house while she did homework, etc etc etc.

tldr: it's all connected, aaaaaaaaa

[alvie-pines]

My art ability is broken right now, but I found a nice picrew and made some of my DreamSMP hetalia!AU OCs! 

First of all: L’manburg my beloved

Out of all the nations, he probably looks the most like a single founder (that founder being Wilbur). But he also has Tommy’s eyes! 

L'manburg has two "eras" to his personality; Schlatt's rule changed him. Before Schlatt was elected, his personality was quite visibly similar to Wilbur’s. His founders were role models to him as a newly formed nation, but he especially took after Wilbur. Like him, L’manburg is rather artistic, and prone to obsession. He can be a bit sensitive, but also emotional like Tommy, and prone to outbursts. (he apologizes, dont worry!) He's also very passionate, and a free soul. The revolutionaries created him to be a symbol of freedom and liberty, and he takes those values to heart.

During Schlatt's rule, however, after being belittled and abused, he became more antisocial and retreated into himself for protection. He became quieter and a lot more depressed. He stopped smiling. He lost a lot of his free spirit to Schlatt. One event that really broke him was Schlatt's order to tear down his walls. It left him feeling betrayed, exposed, vulnerable, unstable. It really broke his spirit. A lot of his artistic side subsided during this time; he didnt feel well enough to make anything that wasnt depressing, and he didnt want to put depressing things into a world that was already suffering, so he hid his paintings and poetry. he also didnt want Schlatt to find them and mock them; L’manburg saw how Schlatt treated other people, like Quackity, and knew not to make himself a target.

Also notable is his reaction to Wilbur's obsession with him during the Pogtopia arc. Wilbur's toxic infatuation with him was disturbing, and L'manburg knew that. But at the same time, he was a nation made and shaped largely by Wilbur. L'manburg himself is also prone to obsession, and combined with his artistic soul, he was predisposed to romanticize Wilbur’s obsessive feelings towards him. Even though he knew it was wrong, he couldnt help but view Wil's passion as flattering... near the end, he even wished to die with Wilbur. 

But he didnt.

The explosion shook him to his core, more than anything had before; he fell, blood on his lips, and his vision blurred; he truly thought he was going to die there. So did wilbur; they thought they were both going to die, together. But L'manburg survived, and Wilbur didn't.

L’manburg awoke later, still injured, but alive. It wasn’t his time yet. His time would come during the Doomsday war, indirectly killed by Dream, Technoblade, and Philza.

And now; Pogtopia, also my beloved, younger sister of L’manburg, though they never knew each other very well...

Don’t let the picture fool you! She’s actually quite young, but the picrew didn’t have the option to make her look like a child.

Pogtopia didn't exist for very long. She was a girl of about six or seven, with curly pink hair and blue eyes. She also had a little snaggle-tooth like techno's tusks :> though the picrew didn’t work out for that. She gets her hair from Wilbur and Techno, and her eyes from Tommy. She was strong-willed and pretty good at taking care of herself, for a kid. She was a natural at swordfighting, or really any weapon they put in her hands. Techno trained her a lot, after he was convinced by Wilbur and Tommy that she wasnt an orphan. ("we're basically her parents!")

She was the first nation on the server to die. Not in battle--they didnt want her fighting anyways--but afterwards.

Nations need citizens to exist. After the rebellion, all of her former citizens went back to L'manburg and became a part of him again. Pogtopia was the first nation on the server to die, and nobody even saw it happen, or realized, until weeks later. They looked for her and she simply... didnt exist anymore. Tommy felt really, really bad about her. He felt like maybe he could have saved her, or at least been there when she died. Regardless, she’s gone now, and won’t be coming back. 

RIP Pogtopia... she died too young :(

Now we have my next beloved; the Arctic North.

Look at this. I combined Technoblade, Philza, and Ranboo and accidentally created the most beautiful man

Arctic North is Ranboo, Philza, and Techno, and sort of includes the syndicate as well, but mostly just because of the overlap. He's tall as fuck, thanks to Ranboo's influence, and has Phil's blonde hair and long ears from Techno, which alltogether makes him look like some kind of snow elf.

He's fairly antisocial, and the manifestation of that can range from "awkward and gangly" like Ranboo to "snobby, better-than-everyone-else" attitude (which is more common). He often appears awkward until he opens his mouth and says something sharp. He really likes to keep his distance, so he doesnt mind that his sharp tongue keeps people from liking him very much. He only needs his three humans, nobody else.

And then there’s Snowchester, my final beloved for this post: 

Snowchester is on the shorter side, like Tubbo, and he usually wears either a big ol fluffy coat or an equally fluffy cloak. Soft, dense winter clothes made for his climate. He looks pretty cute and innocent, with those fluffy clothes and big eyes, but he will FUCK YOUR SHIT UP. He acts sweet but if his citizens are threatened, he turns genuinely terrifying. 

This child will not hesitate to nuke you and everything you love if you so much as look at his citizens the wrong way :]

But he is my beloved and can do no wrong, clearly

.

Oh, what’s that, you say? There’s no personification of the Greater DreamSMP? 

Yes, there is, silly :) His name is just Dream.

... and you all know what Dream looks like, so he doesn’t get a visual here.

See, the thing about personifications on the server is that there are very few of them. L'manburg was the first, Pogtopia the second--and no one saw Pogtopia's death (poor girl) so they still dont know much about how nations form and how they die. So for a while, nobody questioned the fact that the Greater Dream SMP didn’t seem to have a personification.

It wasnt until more personifications, like Arctic North and Snowchester, started popping up, that they started to understand them better and began to question where Dream SMP was... by the time anyone really cared, he was already in prison.

(Dream: “My name is literally Dream, and none of you realized. What did you all expect?”)

Anyways, Dream being a personification, with his physical and mental wellbeing tied to the state of the DreamSMP faction, actually provides a lot of context and motivations for his actions. See, in this AU, L'manburg is not just a threat to his power, but a literal threat to his life/health. He wants to prevent other nations from rising on the server because a decline in power in the DreamSMP faction directly correlates to a decline in his health and personal, physical ability. His actions are still entirely selfish, but in this AU, also motivated by fear. It just adds a nice layer of depth and angst that I quite enjoy :]

but on the upside, you've got the homoerotic undertones of dream literally making george the king of HIM, and gogy just not fuckin noticing (because he doenst know dream is a personification) which is pretty fuckin funny. oblivious king

[redrabbitspod]

This is in no way meant to be rude or disrespectful and I am fully aware that you can do whatever you please but I feel like Neil is getting so out of character. He clearly started to develop more of an own personality but he definitely has been through so much and he is just so..cheery and happy and clingy all the time(which if you’re like that is in no way wrong or bad) and now he reminds me so much of Nicky in AFTG. It’s really hard for me to still see Neil.

OOC: This is very long, and while we think everything leading up to it is super important to our thought process (and yes this is something we’ve thought about) the bit in bold is the heart of the point we try to make. (Please read the whole thing though!)

Hey, I’m actually really happy that you sent this in because I’ve been wanting to talk about it. I know that there’s a post going around that we both wholeheartedly agree with about Neil reaching far past ooc and becoming very ‘fem’. Jeni and I had a really long talk about this because we were worried that our Neil would be perceived or mistaken to fit in that trope. And while I think your concern is EXTREMELY valid (note: people can write the characters however they want. It’s fanfiction, they can do as they please, like you said, we just did not want to go that direction), I have a few points as to why I disagree. 

On surface I definitely get that. Idk if you’ve read the entirety of RRP, but I know for those of you that just read the asks (Im sure there are a lot), it DEFINITELY seems that way. But we went into RRP right off the bat letting people know that these characters will fundamentally be different. In Andrew’s case, we know he’s extremely soft now and we bring that up a LOT in the fic. Both himself acknowledging it and all the other characters around him. But we went in knowing he was going to be very different from canon - mainly because we took out the plotline that he was ever put on meds. In Wish You Were Here, the story we are writing post-season 2, we will be mentioning that and how we twisted it. Because in canon, that shaped his entire character. The medication changed the physiology of his brain and we hated the fact that something so abhorrent was forced upon him by the courts that we didn’t do it. And as a result, Andrew’s character is completely different because he’s able to tap into emotions that were blocked in canon. He’s able to grow in ways that he was not able to before and besides the fact that this is set a good while after college and especially his sophomore year that we saw in canon, he was going to change. We definitely know that them admitting that they love each other, making strides in their relationship both physical and mental, opening up, expressing, for his character may seem extremely ooc for some, but we had to take into account what would’ve happened if we took the thing that shaped his character in canon away. I hope we’ve done him justice. 

Now onto Neil. Neil we work over a LOT. And when Jeni brought this up to me because of the post, there were glaring things in my mind that automatically said no. This doesnt apply to our Neil even though to some it may seem that way. Here’s what we’ve done at least very consciously to make sure that our Neil holds integrity to his canon character, that he holds merit and a backbone to back up how he’s grown throughout our series. 

From day one, we knew that they knew each other. We knew that an event from the past not only shaped how Andrew approaches life, but how Neil does as well. Childish sentiment and nostalgia kept Neil in Arizona for so long, which we imply throughout season 1 and start the ball rolling in the first chapter. For the both of them, they held onto the boy they met at the Grand Canyon through everything they’d been through. When shit got tough, it was each other they thought of. And on some wild whim, Neil hoped one day Andrew would walk through the Book Nook’s doors and he’d see him again. Not because Neil had a crush, because he didn’t. But because Andrew was the embodiment of strength for him. 

New York was really important to us. Neil standing his ground and letting Andrew know exactly what he’d done to him, was what the entirety of Season 1 and EVEN season 2 culminated and came back to. Neil being able to say no, fuck you asshole, and always express exactly how he was feeling, was so vitally important to us. ESPECIALLY when it came to Andrew. Those few weeks of New York we wanted to build a bridge if you will. Andrew’s intentions were always genuine and well-meaning and Neil knew that, but survival instincts and what’s been ingrained in him stuck. They started to have a little give when he came to realize that he felt something for the man before him. But he never lost that fight for himself. That HE has to ALSO be okay. And I think we see a lot in that trope of Neil that he loses the fight, the backbone, the integrity that makes his canon character so compelling (even if he is a martyr). 

One thing we worried people would misinterpret was how fast we pushed their characters together. We definitely get that. In our world we didnt really have the luxury of really stretching it out like some may have, just because we were working with real-time. And honestly? As we wrote, the drive to push them together because they were so connected and intertwined just fell genuinely and organically. For us, it only made sense and not because of canon, but because of the story we’d written already. It made sense to us for Andrew to be the one to hold himself back and Neil be the one reaching out - Neil be the one exploring and beginning to recognize what want and really, agency over himself AND his wants, was. Neil was the one to ask for their first kiss here, Neil was the one to initiate them all afterwards, Neil was the one that asked Andrew to touch him, Neil was the one that asked what they were in Arizona, Neil was the one to bring up sex. And in return, Andrew was peeling away layers of himself, feeling accepted, and wanted, and understood in ways he’d never been before. And honestly? Feeling honored that they were both experiencing emotions in ways that they both never felt before. We see their relationship has an equal give and take, a push and pull. And I’m saying all of this because it’s honestly and truly really important for why we’ve made Neil’s character the way that he is. 

Going into season 2, we knew that happiness could not last long. They both had things to sort out, they both had hurdles to hop over, bridges to cross, whole fucking oceans to swim. Before season 2 started, before we had anything written or really even solidly planned, we knew they had to break up. Jeni even had the scene written back in either july or august. We knew that in order to continue trying to give integrity to their characters and relationship, how far they’d grown but also that growth is not a linear path, we needed to break them up. And in the lead up to that, we made sure that Neil was not only looking out for Andrew or trying to, but that he was looking out for HIMSELF. Unlike in canon, he didnt automatically have the foxes - not in his head at least. Of course he knew he had a home there, he knew that he had friends, but they weren’t like canon because he didnt grow WITH them like he did in canon. In his mind, he really only had Andrew and if there was no Andrew, why stay? And when their fight happened we made sure that Neil had value enough in himself, care for himself, love for himself AND for Andrew that they couldn’t let this go on any longer. Neil left because he knew he deserved better. He knew Andrew needed help and he couldn’t provide it. And he held onto that. In fact, Andrew even held onto it himself: 

“Is there no hope, then?” Andrew asked, unable to help himself.

Neil sighed and Andrew was grateful that he at least didn’t pretend that he didn’t know what Andrew meant.

“I don’t know, Dr- Andrew.” Was it possible for his chest to hurt even more? He wanted to curl in on himself, but settled instead for clenching the sharp corners of the pack of cigarettes in his pocket into the palm of his hand. He watched as Neil bit the inside of his lip and that little indent appeared. Maybe he feels it, too . “Part of me wants to say fuck it all and let’s just go home. I hate this... But I hate what you’ve been putting me through these last couple of weeks even more. I can’t do that again,” he stopped talking once more and inhaled a shuddering breath. “You broke my heart, Andrew. I know I sound dramatic and stupid, but I don’t know how else to say it and - I don’t know how to do this, for fucks sake.” He finally turned to him, but the eye contact was brief and before it was even there, it was gone. “I came into this knowing nothing about relationships and I know even less about breakups. I don’t know how to navigate this.”

“You think I do?” Andrew asked. He didn’t mean  for it to sound so bitter, but there it was.

“I don’t know with you,” Neil shrugged. “I feel like you keep everything so close to your chest, that there are whole sections of you I’m missing. And listen, I don’t blame you. You should be able to choose what you want to share. But I can’t help that it makes things hard when you’re falling apart and I don’t know why...”

Andrew let go of the box and put both of his hands in his lap. Grinding his teeth together, he heard the beginning hum of Bee’s buzz , but took a deep breath to try and keep her at bay. Clearing his throat, he looked back to the stadium and that stupid orange fox paw, before he murmured, “What if I offer you a piece?” - suddenly and quickly said, it was as if his mouth was trying to outrun his mind, despite the second he took to contain it. He’d known this would eventually come - that he would have to do this. And besides, Neil deserved an explanation, even if they never got back together.

“Andrew-”

“I’m not offering with hopes that we’ll get back together right now, Neil. I’m working through shit the best I can. Therapy is helping, but I know it’s a process. I just know you deserve an explanation. And I haven’t wanted to tell you because it’s fucking horrific, but I was also afraid that it would send me even further down the spiral if I talked about it. Now that I have a space to vent through, I don’t think I’m so afraid of the fall.”

This part was so important to us for both Andrew and Neil’s character. And in the entire build up to the break up and directly after, Neil held onto the fact that they needed to talk. He kept bringing it up. Because he knew that if they didn’t it would escalate just like it did before. 

“I wouldn’t risk being with you again if I didn’t think things would be different. I’m not better and to be honest? I probably wont ever be better. I’ve spent my entire life dealing with my shit by myself because that’s just how it was. I’ve avoided relationships because I never trusted anyone with my baggage and I didn’t think it’d be fair to pile it on someone anyway. So when it comes to talking about shit - I’m not used to that. Bee was the only person I’d ever told everything to, and she doesn’t even know all of it.”

“I know that,” Neil said, leaning forward as if to show Andrew how much he actually understood. If that was the case, Andrew believed him. “I know you, Andrew. I would never force you to talk about something you don’t want to. That’s not what I’m trying to do. But , I need you to work with me, and if not me, someone else. Don’t take it out on me when you’re going through shit that neither of us can control. It’s not fair and it makes me feel like I’ve done something wrong and I can’t fix it.”

Now. Now we’re up to your points. I promise all of this was important for me to explain, because I know there’s literally SO MUCH that we’ve written, that shit happening now can get in the way of everything that’s happened before to lead up to this. 

We fully recognize that Neil is definitely happy. But he’s not happy-go-lucky and we tried really hard to make sure he didn’t lose his integrity - his backbone - the things that made Neil, Neil. 

Something I realized throughout this series was that I was getting worried that the focus of season 2 was so heavily on Andrew. I was seriously worried about that. But then I realized that Season 1 was focused solely on Neil. Season 1, Neil was a fucking wreck. It was Matt AND Andrew comforting him, Matt and Andrew bringing him down, Matt and Andrew trying to protect him, take care of him, find him, search for him, all of that. But even through Neil’s horrific anxiety and all the bad shit that happened, it was still Neil that pushed himself up from the ground, pulled Lola back, and gave Andrew the in. It was Neil that fought with the doctors and nurses to see Andrew and make sure he was okay. Even still afterward though, it was Neil discovering and Neil understanding and a lot of Neil, Neil, Neil. 

Season 2 is heavily focused on Andrew. We’ve already seen Neil’s story and his growth. Its Andrew’s turn to try and again, build his bridge to getting better. But with that, it was Neil that made the strides to speak and handle Ichirou, it was Neil that figured out things with his uncle, it was Neil that ultimately had the gun, brought Andrew for practice - took it out and demanded Andrew get behind him this time. It was Neil that looked Andrew in the eyes as the cops patted them down and desperately tried to tether them together.  It was Neil that kept reassuring Andrew they were going home. It was Neil that snapped the moment the cop tried to put his hands on Andrew to show them where their things were when they left the prescient, and ANDREW that allowed himself to be pulled into Neil’s arms in that moment, because he knew that he was the one thing that was SAFE. It was Neil that held Andrew that night and Andrew that LET himself be held as he broke down. 

That was one chapter ago. And we really tried to illustrate at the end that they have a life ahead of them now. They have a future - a future that is spread out and it’s bright and full of possibilities. They have a future where they can do what they want. They have a FAMILY. They have nieces, Aaron, Kate, Bee, the entire TFN team. Neil had nothing and now he has something. He has hope. 

Promise Im coming down to the end omfg. This is why our Authors and End Notes are so fucking long i swear to fucking god. 

This BTP chapter, we wanted to explore that fucking unbridled happiness. That elation of fuck - we have the world out in front of us. We don’t have any killers on our backs, Hailey is safe, Robin is safe, Jean is out, the Moriyama’s are taken care of, Stuart isn’t begging Neil to join the Hatford Branch, Aaron and Kate might be moving back to South Carolina, they’re married and all of that isn’t terrifying. It’s COMFORTING. So yes, this BTP chapter was bright and cheery. Neil was most certainly happy and showing it. Jumping on the bed, kisses all around, getting excited over ZOO BABIES and a ZOO CHOO train. But just because we show this side of him where he gets to go on a road trip and experience real and true fucking freedom for the first time, doesn’t mean that we’re all of a sudden shedding everything that we’ve built for his character. I don’t think that’s what you meant, but I mean it when I say we take the characters, the integrity of the characters, very, very seriously. Also in this chapter, Neil takes a homophobic asshole to task and not in the way that a lot of people do, but by quietly hinting at the threat because Neil doesn’t need bells and whistles. In fact, he even talked about how being happy was something his mother frowned upon: 

Because the way he looked at Neil when a butterfly landed on his finger or when he snuggled up to a goat in the petting zoo let Neil know that Andrew was happy. And he was happy.  That was something Neil never really had in his life. His mother didn’t care if he was happy, only that he was alive . In fact, the less happy he was, the fucking better. By her logic, he was less likely to go rogue if he didn't feel like there was something to be happy about outside of her. 

Neil’s finally had a moment to enjoy and let go and we know exactly how that can come off, but we have an entire future planned for them and the book they’re about to explore. Spoiler Alert: It won’t be all “butterflies and rainbows”. But all of this does not mean that all of a sudden we’re giving in to tropes and changing his character entirely because of one chapter. RRP and it’s characters mean too much to us. 

So I definitely get where you’re coming from and I’m so fucking sorry this is so long omfg. And I respect your view because we definitely worried that people would see them like that. But we have a reason for almost everything we do in this fic and really, we just wanted to see the boys happy here. We don’t believe he’s like Nicky and we don’t believe he’s clingy, but everyone interprets these characters differently, and you’re certainly entitled to that opinion. We hope this just makes our thought process on Neil’s development a little clearer. - The Creators