#so don't expect me to appear here until june

[daretoassume]

read when you are so obsessed with your desires

i understand if someone becomes obsessed with their desires, placing them on a pedestal and thinking about them constantly. i think we have all experienced that at some point, where we really want that desire right now, here in our reality.

if you feel this way at present, it is completely okay. we desire things; we are human. the difference with those who are not attached to their desires is that they are more disciplined with their thinking, beliefs, and perception. you can be that too by detaching yourself from the intense wanting and needing of that desire right now.

one thing i did when i was obsessing over my desires was to tell myself, quietly, softly,

"i'm grateful for everything that i have. i always have everything that i need. i would be very excited when my desire shows up, but i will be okay if it never does."

now, before you say anything, like "how could you say that? how will it show up if you're contradicting it?!"

i'm not.

i'm not contradicting my manifestation. what i seek is the FEELING/STATE. when i say that statement, i experience the energy of HAVING my desires already or a sense of ease. it is the feeling of not needing it so much, so i don't feel compelled to look at the 3D for proof. i know that i am okay whether it happens or not. there is no resistance because i am not obsessing over it 24/7.

asking myself, "what's the scariest thing that will happen if i don't get my desire?" allows me to uncover deeper trauma/issues within me that i can discover and release.

because "holding on to it" means "not having."

the less you attach yourself to your desires, the easier it is to match their vibration. they already exist, they are already done, they are already happening. all you need to do is match that vibration. once you do, a series of bridge of incidents will appear moment by moment until you realize, "oh, it happened." but you don't keep looking outside and ask, "is it here?" "where is it?" "why isn't it happening yet?"

i have experienced many instances where my desires manifested when i least expected them, especially with little things. since they are so small, we don't think about them much or feel a strong need for them. we just know that we would love it if they happened, and they do. for example, i started here on tumblr two months ago and didn't really expect to gain followers so quickly. i had 0 followers in june 2024, and now, in august 2024, i have reached 500. i remember posting a quote at night and waking up to 4 likes. i was shocked, as i never really expected any likes at all.

i know that you can still match the vibration of your desires (manifest) even if you are obsessed with them, but the issue is that you suffer when you are too attached. this can disrupt your daily life, particularly your mindset. thinking that your desires are not showing up makes you anxious and only produces feelings of frustration and doubt in your manifestations. it doesn't have to be difficult. we are always manifesting either way. you prefer the feelings that will serve you more and are aligned with your divine self.

[piratefalls]

welcome back to the latest edition of biweekly fic recs! as always, mind the tags, if you can't leave a nice comment don't leave one at all, and happy reading!

masterlist.

There's No Problem That San Diego Can't Solve by @historicallysam

Alex doesn’t even bother knocking; he simply twists the knob on the door and shoves it open. His eyes narrow as the door bangs against the wall and he sees Henry on the phone. Maybe (definitely) it’s rude but his blood is fucking boiling so he doesn’t really care.

All the Ocean was Sleeping by @sparklepocalypse

The worst part about being a siren in the modern era, Henry ponders as yet another ship flies past his cove at a speed that he knows will disturb the anemone gardens below, is the yacht bros. Between the sound of their vessels’ motors and the dissonant noise the humans call music, Henry’s singing has no chance of attracting anyone’s attention.

cause you're a classic, and i'm reckless by @firenati0n

“I've, actually, uh. I've never done this before.” At this, Henry stops short, takes a second as his gaze moves up and to the left, trying to recall something. “I've seen your films. You most certainly have done intimate scenes.” Alex clears his throat. He hopes his nerves aren't completely obvious, the slight waver in his voice about to give him away. “Yeah, well. Never with a man, so. Not at this scale, anyway.” “Would it help to, er, practice?" Henry winces a little as he says it, which does not inspire confidence. But Alex is shocked nonetheless. What the fuck?

Over Land and Sea by SatinBirds

Alex and Henry come from very different worlds, and still, they manage to find each other.

Clean Slate by smc_27

“Henry.” Pez comes over, puts both hands on Henry’s cheeks and looks him dead in the eye. “You are not a sad man who’s gotten dumped. You’re in the prime of your life, and I quite desperately need you to act like it.” “The prime of my life,” Henry scoffs, more incredulous than questioning. “I’ve just gotten out of a 15 year relationship, endured a divorce, am suffering an almost impressive case of writer’s block, and your hands are like bloody icicles.” Pez grins, doesn’t take his hands away. “Explain to me how this is my prime. Please.” Pez tilts his head, and sounds entirely serious when he says, “Literally anything can happen from here.”

in bloom by stutteringpeach

Yoo, can u hook me up with some flowers?? It's the busiest day of the year for florists. Alex texts Henry with a last minute request.

here is a map (with your name for a capital) by @alasse9

That day at the Rio de Janeiro Olympics, Alex comes across the very same Prince Henry who just dismissed him having a panic attack in a bathroom. The choice Alex makes then has ripple effects neither of them could have ever expected. What's the story like, when they actually are friends all along? “So, you’re going back to England tonight, and you’ll spend the next three days pretending you two are the closest and best of friends until we can put this mess behind us.” And there are reasons he hasn’t told anybody this, good reasons, even though he’s sure June and Nora saw through him ages ago. Faced with his mom’s disappointment, though, and with the realization that the entire world apparently thinks he hates Henry and would willingly shove him into a fucking cake, he can’t stay quiet. “But we are friends,” he says, vehement and serious. “We have been for years. He’s—he’s probably my best friend, actually, along with Nora.”

thoughts of you consume by yrsonpurpose

Henry sees Alex appear on the red carpet in a blue suit that screams sex on legs and is ready to throw away all attempts at concealing their secret relationship in the name of dropping to his knees at the first available opportunity.

eyes on me by matherine

Alex’s hips buck back against Henry’s mouth the moment his tongue does more than tease, and Henry squeezes his hip in gentle consternation. But before he can say anything, Alex is already rambling. “Sorry, I’m — I’m sorry, I know you said not to move, and I’m trying, I — I’m trying to be good, I promise,” he blurts, voice shaking ever so slightly from something that certainly doesn’t sound like pleasure, resolutely refusing to turn his head so that he can meet Henry’s gaze from where he’s positioned behind him. Henry’s heart aches. “Alex — love, it’s alright. Where’s your mind?” Or: Sometimes, Alex needs a distraction. Something to take the edge off, to scrub away at the stress of the day. Some days, it works better than others. 

the evolution of intimacy by Poutini

There’s no spontaneity anymore. One might think this boring. That the novelty had worn off. The spark snuffed. Absolutely not

Want Me by OrchidScript

Henry had always been weak for a nice smile, but his was impossible to ignore. Blame it on summer heat and a fresh flush in his cheeks. Blame it on sunset painting the outdoor bar sweltering, romantic colors. Blame it on two healthy glasses of albariño thrumming in his bloodstream, or the good music floating on the air. Henry could blame it on anything liked if he thought long and hard about it, but that didn’t change much at the end. The core remained the same: he had been gone from the jump. -- Henry and Alex hook up on a vacation in Spain. Henry falls a bit deeper.

fill my lungs with sweetness by @priincebutt

Henry George Edward James Fox-Mountchristen-Windsor wakes up at 3 AM on his birthday to an empty bed. What could Alex possibly be getting up to at 3 AM the night before his birthday? The possibilities are endless.

got myself in quite a tangle by coffeecatsme

"It seems I've gotten myself in quite a tangle." "Tangle?" Henry's voice is hoarse, eyes darkened as they travel over Alex's body. They stop at his crotch, and Alex can see it even under the dim lights—Henry's growing hard too, a visible bulge pushing at his sweatpants. Alex's cock gives a desperate twitch. "Y'know, I was trying to put them around the tree," he starts, gesturing at the plain tree at the corner. It's clear he didn't even attempt to touch it. "And somehow I've managed to completely trap myself. Can't even move my hands." Henry makes a desperate noise at the back of his throat as his eyes snap up to Alex's face. Alex flashes him a suggestive grin, teeth biting down on his lip. "Seems I'm completely at your mercy."

The Forces of Chance and Coincidences by @stellarm

Bad weather leads to a late flight that leads to no one being where they wanted to be, but maybe everyone was where they needed to be.

I've never felt safer (than when I'm with you) by viciouslyqueer

Alex takes the bag and opens it slowly, careful not to rip it, and gasps quietly as he sees what’s inside. “H, you didn’t…” Strong arms wrap around his waist from behind, Henry’s chest warm against his back. “Do you like it?” Henry asks in a whisper, resting his chin on Alex’s shoulder. Alex doesn’t know what to say. Gingerly, like he might ruin it with even the smallest touch, he takes out the silky fabric and holds it up in front of them. It’s a gorgeous dress, fancy too, in a deep red color with thin straps and an open back. It’s long, almost touching the floor even as Alex holds it up and has a slit on the left side that would probably end a little above Alex’s knee.

An Amateur's Guide to Professional Gift-Giving by anincompletelist

Alex, a former-law-student-taking-some-time-off turned professional part-time gift giver, is tasked with finding a gift for the most high profile client he's ever worked with, both in and out of the world of law. It turns out finding the perfect gift for the Prince of Wales might be easier than he'd anticipated.

Love At First Bark by everwitch

“I still don’t know your name, do I?” Henry watches Alex where he’s crouched down in front of David and gently scratching David below his chin. David absolutely loves Alex. Henry can relate. “It’s David,” Henry supplies. “Cool,” Alex says. “And what’s the dog’s name?” Henry blinks at him. “... David?” “What?” Alex exclaims. He looks from David to Henry and then back at David again. “Wow, okay, that is a choice.” Henry wants to sink through the earth and never come back up again.

don't let me get drunk again by headabovethewater

Alex had never wanted to cancel plans as much as he had while watching Henry pull a pair of light wash, tight jeans over his stockinged legs and bare ass. Christ, he’s getting hard thinking about it now.

The Beginner's Guide to Floristry by clottedcreamfudge

As if there's anything romantic about it; as if it's not the most humiliating death Alex can imagine. This is why he doesn't do relationships. This is why he never will. The risk, as far as he fucking sees it, is too great. -- Hanahaki Disease is a fictional disease where the victim of unrequited or one-sided love begins to vomit or cough up the petals and flowers of a flowering plant growing in their lungs, which will eventually grow large enough to render breathing impossible.

Everything you take, you make it better. So go on, take forever by @hgejfmw-hgejhsf

It's 2024, and nobody knows they're engaged. But they will, just as soon as Alex can decide what to wear to his birthday dinner. Henry has an idea and a special gift to match.

false pretenses by rizcriz

Henry spins around, glaring at Alex. “For christs sake,” He hisses, holding a hand out between them. “Can we just not? I do not have the capacity to pretend to hate you today.” Alex splutters as Henry turns on his heel and starts to walk away. He stares after him helplessly. “Pretend?” After a beat, he starts to follow after him, “What the fuck do you mean pretend?” Three years of breathing down each others necks, fighting every time they come in contact with each other. And if Henry is saying every single thing on his end has been pretend, Alex Claremont-Diaz is going to have a fucking breakdown. Because he has been harboring this stupid fucking crush and burying it beneath false antagonism, meeting Henry where he’s at, for three years, and if Henry is implying that they’re both faking it— -- or, Alex learns better.

turn the desert to glass (you would be the one) by @taste-thewaste

Henry and Alex's domestic bliss has lead to some changes in Henry's body. Henry doesn't really mind being a little chubby, but he wonders if Alex does. Alex, it turns out, does not. Not one bit. He does not mind one bit, and he is more than eager to prove it.

coming on fast like good dreams do by cricketnationrise

When Henry recovers from his unexpected factory reset, he still can’t really breathe properly and somehow Alex is still standing in front of him with a hopeful and excited expression on his face. “Run that by me again?” he asks faintly. “I need your help.” “Right…” “I need you to edge me. Like a lot,” Alex says with a shrug. Nope, it’s not any clearer a second time around.

as always, let me know if you want to be tagged in future lists, whether you're a reader or writer!

tagging @starkfridays @stilesgivesmefeels @midnightsfp @sarahjswift @enablelove

[thedoctorsthings]

Power to the king | final chapter

Here she finally is, the final chapter. This concludes Yoongi's part of the story, but don't fret, Power to the king is not done yet. The next member I will write is Seokjin. However don't expect a peep out of me until at least the end of June because I have finals. Enjoy!

WC: About 2k

Warnings: minor character death, angst, smut but it's only vaguely described not explicitly detailed because I'm a big wuss, good ending don't worry

You had visited the princess, but not much had come out of it. After you told her what you heard she had looked at you quizzically and told you that Frida had always accompanied her brother on his trips. She also said that she never thought anything of it until now. The discovery that Yoongi’s relationship with this maid dated back years was a blow to your stomach, but at least the princess was honest with you. You had formed an ally in this castle.

On the morning of your husband’s return you feel more confident than ever.  On your wedding night he had made you promise to never let your emotions run amok again, and today you would show him you remembered. You had no idea if Yoongi knew how you felt.

It’s almost noon and you’re waiting for his arrival in the great hall with the rest of the family. It was customary for the person who had been away to give a report on the situation to the council. First, he would be welcomed back by his entire family. Jungkook, who was standing next to you, whispered: "I promised him a huge favour if he stopped shaving while travelling”. ‘What did he say?”, you asked. “He agreed, but I’d rather not discuss what he made me do. He better walk through that door with a beard”. You barely had time to answer, or the doors flew open revealing Yoongi, without beard, and his entourage.

With a forced smile and a hushed: “You bastard”, under his breath, Jungkook approached his brother and shook his hand. The minute you saw your husband appear all the confidence left your body. How could you tell this beautiful, intimidating man that you hated him. All you were left with was sadness about the progress you had made that was now lost. After greeting the king your husband came up to you and ceremoniously pressed his and your cheeks together, as was customary. You barely reacted, no eye contact, no smile. There was some visible confusion on his face, but he didn’t say anything about it.

That evening, at dinner, you went back to your old, quiet self. You had no idea why because you had promised yourself you would be strong and tell him he had to stop seeing her. Instead, you had deflated in on yourself upon seeing him.

Yoongi’s eyes were boring holes into your skull. He was seated opposite of you, and spent the entire night staring, no glaring, at you. After the meal you wasted no time fleeing to your rooms. What was wrong with you? Why couldn’t you just talk to him and tell him off like you had before? Suddenly there’s an aggressive sounding knock on your door. “Come in”. You’ve barely uttered, or he’s already inside. He stands tall in front of your door, about two meters from you. “What’s wrong with you?” You’re shocked. What’s wrong with you? You’re not the one sleeping with some maid. “What do you mean?”, you bite back while folding your arms. “You embarrassed me in front of my family, I thought we had made progress. I thought we could be civil to each other now”. He’s pointing accusingly at you now, clear anger on his face. You bite the inside of your lip. “Well, I thought so too, but I should have realised it was only about civility for you”. He stands quiet for a moment, face riddled with angry confusion. “What are you talking about?” You take a step closer to him and gather all your courage. “You’re sleeping with Frida. I saw you together some time ago, and now you took her on your trip. I should have known you only visited me every night to keep me content, so you could keep sneaking around with your favourite maids”.

His face contorts in a snarl: “You have no right to accuse me of anything”, he spits. You laugh: “Is it not true then?” your voice overshoots slightly at this last question. He stays quiet. Your eyes begin to tear, but he doesn’t see, he never does. “Are there more? Are you in love with her? God Yoongi, why did you do this?” He stays quiet, and you almost lose your mind. You start yelling as tears well up in your eyes for real now: “Answer me, Yoongi! How could you do this to me? How come you can barely look at me or spend time with me, but you can sneak around sleeping with her without even paying attention who sees?” “Because!” he yells, “I feel sorry, when I look at you, I feel sorry! I trapped you in a marriage with the most loveless man in the kingdom. I can’t stand to be around you because you remind me of how horrible I am. I felt like pushing you away from me would free you”.

It's your turn to be silent now. Anger is coursing through your entire body. How dare he act as if he was helping you by setting you aside as a wife. “If you feel so guilty why not be better?” Your question is almost immediately followed by an answer.  “Because I’m not good! I can never give you what you want. I’m not a husband, I wasn’t ready”. He says while finally looking you in the eye. “Neither was I” you cry, “But you don’t see me running of with someone else. I’ve been trying so hard to make something of this!” Yoongi scoffs. He had been standing in the same spot this whole time, but now he moves closer. “Don’t act like you haven’t thought about it”, he spits. “I’ve seen the way you behave around me brother”.

You’re standing face to face now, closer than you’ve ever been. You’re white hot with anger. “You are a coward”. You can feel his breath on your face. He bends down. Heath is radiating off him. One moment you’re glaring at your husband, the next, you throw yourself in his arms as he engulfs you, and almost lifts you off the floor. His mouth is on yours and he kisses you as if there’s something he desperately needs from you. Both your hands roam everywhere, pulling at hair, undoing buttons, scratching over bare skin. You stumble on the bed. It marks the start of a long night full of passion and anger. He’s a man starved and you’re willing to give him everything your body has to give.

The next morning Yoongi is gone. You had slept tangled up together, but you hadn’t noticed him getting up. The maid, who you know is here to get you dressed, knocks on your door. Low and behold there she’s standing, Frida. You let her dress you as if nothing is wrong. It’s not that you don’t want to confront her. You just don’t know how you would go about it. At breakfast he doesn’t say a word to you, doesn’t even make eye contact. The only thing you get out of him is a slight smirk to himself when he sees you having trouble standing up on your sore legs.

That day the princess takes you on a walk around the castle. You’re chattering away when you cross the big courtyard. It’s the third day of the week, a little past noon. This means it’s the moment of the weekly delivery of vegetables at the castle. You get your greens from the same farmer every week. The farm is owned by Harald Park. After you saw the man named Jimin almost light his hair on fire at the festival, you had asked Jungkook about him, and he had told you he was Harald’s son. Recently, however, Harald had fallen ill and Jimin took over the deliveries for the palace. When you walk past him, he’s tossing a bag of grain off the carriage, but he stops to make some of the most intense eye contact with the princess you’ve ever seen. You suppress a smile and wait until you’re out of earshot to ask her: “What was that?” The princess blushes and says: “It’s nothing”, while hiding her face from you. It’s nothing yet, you add in your mind.

For the entire rest of the week Yoongi doesn’t make any contact with you. He only says something to you when it’s absolutely necessary, and he doesn’t come to visit you in the evening. Every day Frida helps you dress and every day you almost say something. By the end of the week, you can’t take it anymore, and after dinner you decide to take matters into your own hands. You march towards his room and knock on his door. He opens the door and looks at you with one eyebrow lifted. For some reason that face makes you angrier than ever. “Why won’t you talk to me?”, it's a simple question you ask, but it leads to another heated argument, and another passionate night.

Over the course of the next weeks, you notice that You and Yoongi look for little reasons to get angry about so that you can march into each other’s rooms, have a screaming match and then spend the night together. During those nights he discovers parts of your body which you had no idea even existed. You draw an animal out of him, and no matter how much you’ve come to hate him, you long for these nights. When you fall asleep next to him, you sleep better than you have in months. You’re more energetic during the day, and Yoongi too, seems to be doing better than ever. How come you can’t share this newfound bliss with each other. Outside of the occasional fight in the evening you barely talk to him.

Another thing you’ve noticed is that you haven’t seen Yoongi around Frida since that first night you slept together. Maybe he’s just more secretive or careful about it now. One morning you wake up to the knock of the maid on your door. However, when she comes in it’s not Frida. It’s Gertrud again. “Good morning, your highness”. “Good morning”, you greet. You get up to stand in front of the mirror and stare out the window puzzled. When Gertrud is adjusting your corset, you ask: “Where is Frida?” Gertrud seems to have to think for a second before she says: “She got sent away to one of the properties of some rich lord. I think as some sort of diplomatic gesture. Before she left, she said it was your husband’s decision”. “Will she be coming back?” Gertrud pulls on the strings of your corset and says: “They usually don’t, your highness”. “oh”, is all you can muster. After she leaves you stand in front of the mirror for a minute longer. Guess you won’t have to confront Frida after all.

That night, after dinner, you decide to visit the queen again. It had been quite some time since your last visit, and you liked spending time with her. Right when you reach her rooms the doors are slammed open. It’s the younger druid, Taehyung. He looks more serious than ever. “Oh good, your highness, you’re here. Go get your husband. It’s the queen”. After this he rushes towards the king’s quarters without giving you time to answer. You rush to Yoongi’s chambers. While you’re almost running through the dark hallways, tears start welling up in your eyes. You loved the queen so much; she had been such good support for you. You couldn’t lose her. You knock on Yoongi’s door frantically. He opens the door looking distraught: “By Odin, what’s wrong with you?” “Yoongi, it’s your mother”.

Yoongi had held her hand as she went. The princess had lied next to her, and Jungkook sat at the foot of her bed. You stayed seated in the chair next to the bed. While all his children were shedding tears for their dear mother and saying goodbye to her, the king had simply walked in, asked the druid how long she had and left again. The queen had smiled one last time at her children and closed her eyes for good. Yoongi hadn’t cried a single tear. He just looked utterly defeated. After Jungkook left the room, you helped the princess into her own bed. She had asked you to stay with her, and of course you did. After you were sure she had fallen asleep, you decided to check on your husband. Not before placing the princess’ little sleeping dog next to her on the bed to replace your warmth.

You knocked softly and after hearing a hum you slowly opened the door. The room was lit by one single candle and Yoongi was standing by the window looking out at the darkness. You had no idea what to say so you just walked over to him and placed your hand on his shoulder. He turned to look at you and for a moment nothing happened. Then he broke down. This was the first time you had seen him cry, and it wouldn’t surprise you if this was the first time in years that he had. All you knew to do was take him into your arms. He let you. That night, after he calmed down, you washed your husband’s face and helped him into his night shirt. Both of your eyes had been bloodshot, because of the many tears, by the time you got into bed. You let him rest his head on your chest. Right before you fell asleep, you thought about how it took the queen dying for you to finally treat each other lovingly.

It had been three weeks since the queen passed, and Yoongi finally felt like he was getting a hold of himself again. You had been incredibly understanding and warm towards him for these three weeks, and he had no idea how to thank you or how to reciprocate. He was sitting in at his desk right before dinner. For the first time he thought back to that night. For the past three weeks his memory had blocked everything that had happened the night of his mother’s passing. It was finally coming back to him. The way you had been so soft, the way you had kissed his tears away and washed his face. He hadn’t said anything that entire night except right after he had broken down in your arms. He mumbled: “He didn’t even look at her”. You had simply nodded. You stayed so strong for him even though he had seen the tears in your eyes multiple times that night. Is this what it meant to be supported? When he entered the dining hall you were already sitting there. You were so impossibly beautiful. To everyone who saw you, you looked so delicate, but he knew the fire under your skin. He loved you, and he had to figure out how to tell you before you started to hate him again.

You’re sitting in your room, writing a letter to your mother. The queen’s passing had made you realize that if you didn’t try to make it right with her now, you might never have the chance. You’re dipping your feather in the ink when you hear something small and hard hit the window. You look up for a second, but then go back to writing. Then it happens again. This time you get up and open your window. You look down, and there is your husband, with a little stone in his hand, ready to throw again. “You know some people knock on doors. It’s much easier; you can use your hands”, you remark dryly. “I have to tell you something, but I can’t do it when you’re close to me. Y/N when I look into your eyes, I get lost. Every time I try to talk to you, I lose all words, which is horrible because you deserve so many. I’m hoping that if I do it from down here, I’ll actually get out what I’ve been trying to express for so long. Y/N, my wife, I love you”. He’s rambling now: “I know it might be hard to believe, but when I’m around you I’m softer than ever. I can’t sleep when you’re not near. I am so incredibly sorry for how I’ve treated you. I thought I was helping you by staying distant. I thought that I could make you hate me by sleeping with a maid, or by never talking to you. That I could somehow save you from the horror that is me, but you’ve made me realize that I can be better. From now on there will be only you, and if you’ll let me, I’ll spend the rest of my life thanking you”.

You stay quiet for a moment. He mutters: “Please say something”. You break into a teary smile: “Come up here, you idiot”.

@lifeless-firefly @viankiss @emerald-notes @daisies-and-dandelionpuffs @jjkwifestyle @nansasa

thank you so much for all the love

[putschki1969]

2024/06/30 Blog post by Wakana 6月最後の日！〜皆さん、本日締め切りです‼︎＼＼\\٩( 'ω' )و //／／〜

❗This is Fan Club EXCLUSIVE content❗ ❗PERSONAL USE ONLY❗ ❗Do NOT SHARE on other sites❗ ❗Join her FAN CLUB! Check out my detailed TUTORIAL ❗

Last Day of June!〜Everyone, Today is the Deadline!＼＼\\٩( 'ω' )و //／／〜

And just like that it's already the last day of June! I'm spending this day looking at photos of the gorgeous hydrangeas at Yokosuka Museum of Art ＼＼\٩( 'ω' )و //／／Amazing… they were in full bloom😳✨The days are getting longe and I really feel like it's summer😊

Hello, this is Wakana(0￣▽￣0)／

I always feel energised by nature🌳

Well! Before starting with the big Sarushima arc, I'd like to talk about some of my fangirl activities from a while back😊These pictures are from April when I went to see "Detective Conan: The Movie 1,000,000" by myself. Before heading to the movie theatre, I had a special Kaito Kid collaboration ice cream at Baskin Robbins!! It was called "Kaito Kid's Jewel Sundae"🍨I went on a weekday morning so I was the only one in the store. When the sundae was brought to my table, the first thing I thought was, "it's huge!!"😂I immediately opened the acrylic coaster that came with the order so I could take a commemorative photo with the sundae📸It really feels like I was doing my very best to support my favourite character. By the way, this acrylic coaster is the same one that made a special appearance during my online after-talk event. It matches perfectly with my own acrylic stand😭 Amazing😭✨ There's a moon just like Kid-sama's trademark moon in the background, and our outfits are matching too😭 It's an incredible miracle😭✨

There were two types of ice cream to choose from, one of which was my favourite "Chocolate Chip"🍫 (unfortunately, it is no longer available…) The other one was a special limited edition "Detective Conan Yogurt-Berry Ice Cream"😊I took so many pictures, the sound of my "snap📸snap📸" echoed throughout the quiet store.

But… really… this sundae was huge!! 🍨🍨��🍨🍨When I saw the whipped cream on top, I was worried whether or not I would be able to finish all of it. And as expected, I was struggling😇 By the time I got to the chocolate chip ice cream, my stomach felt a little bloated 😇 (or rather, I was craving something salty to make up for all the sweetness) But of course I ate it all!! And I was freezing!! (It was a chilly day) When I got to the bottom, I realised for the first time that Kid-sama was printed on the other side of the cup.✨

After eating delicious ice-cream and getting really cold, I headed to the cinema!! Once I was seated, I peeled Kid-sama off the back of my phone to take a took a picture 😂But thinking about it, I should have taken out the acrylic stand I got earlier 😭 How stupid of me😭Following an exciting and happy time watching a great movie, I went to Sushizanmai on the way home and ate my favourite torotaku maki🥰🍣I love torotaku!! ︎I want to start and finish my meal with torotaku 😻 (and have something grilled in between) Even though I love it so much, my photo doesn't do it justice🥺 But it still looks delicious 🤤 (at least in my opinion)

So, everyone, today is the last day of June which means it's the submission deadline for the talk topic of my next "Wakana's Talk Garden" Vlog which will be posted on July 10th! … Don't forget to stay hydrated and protect yourself from the heat♪

Until next time~☆( '▽')/

＊＊＊Wakana＊＊＊

2024/07/04 Instagram post by Wakana

Yesterday, I went to Yokohama Red Brick Warehouse to see Day 1 of "Everyday’s Omatsuri 2024"!! The venue is so big. For the first day of the event, live performances were held by the event's producer, ISEKI, alongside Simon Isogai and Yohei Hamabata. 🤗 The distance between the stage and the audience was small so it was an exciting and heated live performance. 😳💓Summer has finally begun…!! 🎐🌻🏝️🌊🌞See you all here on Saturday the 13th. ☺️(Source)

Title: “AirTrip presents Everyday’s Omatsuri 2024” Date and time:July 13, 2024 Open 18:30 / Start 19:00 Venue: Yokohama Red Brick Warehouse Performers: RYTHEM・Wakana Official site: http://omatsuridays.jp/

[alj4890]

Your mission, if you choose to accept it! :)

I'm sending a GIF to everyone who has participated in Tobias Carrick Appreciation Week this year. Can you create a ficlet (or anything you desire) based on this by Sunday? If so, you'll get one extra chance at the prize to be selected on Monday! :)

Here is your GIF:

Okay. LOL! LOVE the above gif so much. Before I begin a whole new AU about this with my otp, here's a short background on my MC. Chris, is American born to Scottish parents and was raised mostly in Inverness. She has a temper, but usually just tells someone off. It would take a lot to get her this violent, like say someone not only manipulating her but also hooking up with a doctor she's fallen for. Going back to Book 2 and rewriting Canon and my own HC for this one.

Rated Mature for Sexual Content and Language. Chris's upbringing allowed me to find some unique Scottish insults that cried out to be used in this.

Masterlist

Game on

The Edenbrook/Mass Kenmore Softball Game

"Good luck out there, Chris." June said. "Remember to run Carrick's face in the dirt for taking that grant from us."

"Don't worry." Chris told her. "He won't be near as handsome when I'm done with him."

June slowly smiled in hearing that.

"Good. I can't wait to see him get knocked down a peg or two."

Taking a deep breath, Chris began to stretch. Shaking her arms out, she made her way to the pitcher's mound.

Of course, she thought, he would be first up to bat.

"You got this Chris!" Elijah shouted.

"Does she now?" Tobias taunted. "You sure you can do this, Valentine?"

Chris was tempted to stick her tongue out at him. The childish thought made her snicker. Tobias's stance eased when he saw her smile. His own lips curved at how cute she was in her uniform.

It was all the distraction Chris needed to throw the first strike. Shocked, Tobias tried to regroup. He narrowed his eyes at her as he tightened his grip on the bat. She winked at him, shaking his concentration, once more.

"Strike Two!" Elijah yelled out. "I don't know about you, Carrick, but I think she can do this."

Tobias rolled his eyes as he lifted his bat over his shoulder once more.

Chris eyed him, taking in how his uniform conformed to his body. A soft smile appeared on her lips as she thought how he might drive her crazy but he was very attractive.

He blinked at that secretive smile she had. After all the escalation between them with taking patients from one another, he never expected her to actually check him out.

"Strike three!" Elijah cackled. "Oh man. You didn't even bother to swing at that last pitch."

"Take it as a goodwill gesture." Tobias replied. "Next time, I won't go easy."

***************

Between innings...

Chris searched through the coolers of beer until she found a bottle of water.

"Keeping your head clear for the game, Valentine?"

She spun around at the sound of that teasing voice.

Tobias Carrick grinned at her as he reached past her for a bottle of water.

"Glad to see someone is taking this as serious as I do." He winked at her.

"You should wish I wasn't." She couldn't help but smile at him. "Then you might stand a chance to actually hit the ball."

He narrowed his eyes at her. Each time she pitched, he struck out. Though impressed, he wasn't about to admit defeat.

"I've still got a few points on that board." He reminded her. "And there will be even more before the night is over."

Chris stepped closer to him. "You wish that were true."

Tobias took another step closer. "You're going to eat those words."

"Doubtful." Her eyes flickered down his body. "I'm sure you win a lot of things, but tonight isn't going to be one of those nights."

"Want to bet?" He leaned down until his nose nearly touched hers.

His gaze settled on her mouth before locking eyes with hers.

"That all depends," she replied, "what's on the table?"

His lips quirked into a flirty smile. "I can think of one thing I'd like to see on the table."

Her eyebrows rose. The image of just what he'd do to her on that table made a flash of heat go through her body.

"I bet you do." She tilted her head. "I guess we'll just have to--"

"Get away from her!"

The startled pair turned towards a furious Ethan Ramsey.

He moved between them, glaring at Tobias.

"Leave her alone." Ethan bit out.

Tobias narrowed his eyes at him. "What's your deal, Ethan? We were only talking."

"Bullshit." Ethan hissed. "I know you. Chris is off limits."

"Excuse me?" Chris snapped.

"Doesn't sound like she is to me." Tobias winked at her over Ethan's shoulder.

Ethan grabbed hold of Tobias's jersey. "I mean it, Carrick. You've messed with me enough. Just because you poached our patient, doesn't mean you can also take her."

Before Tobias could snap back, Naveen forced them apart.

"Calm down." He ordered. "Take it out on the field."

Tobias snorted. Downing his water bottle, he made sure to knock his shoulder into Ethan's as he walked away.

Ethan grit his teeth, before turning to Chris.

"What did he say to you?" He demanded.

"Nothing but typical trash talk." She replied. "There was no need for you to get involved."

She straightened her shoulders. "I can handle myself. I don't need you jumping in to save me."

Ethan removed his ball cap and ran his hand through his hair. He knew he should have never agreed to play this asinine game.

"I know you can." He looked past her to where the Mass Kenmore team was sitting. "Seeing him try and get close to you, it made me..."

He cursed under his breath.

"So what if he tries to get close to me?" She looked away from Ethan. "It isn't like you want to be in that position."

"Damnit, Chris." Ethan whispered. "You know why I can't--"

"Save your breath." She muttered. "I've heard it all before."

"Wait." He grasped her arm when she tried to walk away. "Carrick isn't the type of man you can tease and not get burned."

Chris jerked her arm away.

"Don't worry." She glared at him. "I know all about being burned."

Ethan watched her storm off with a heavy heart.

******************

After the game, Chris was still full of restless energy. Their win over Mass Kenmore hadn't made her feel any better about the war they'd been having over patients.

When her friends invited her out to celebrate, she sent them on without her. The thought of another night spent in Donahue's with the same faces and conversations didn't appeal to her.

Trying to decide whether or not to just go back to her apartment, she heard her name called out.

She searched for the source and saw Tobias leaning against the side of his car.

"What?" She said once she made her way over.

"Congratulations." He said.

A reluctant smile peeped out at him.

"Thanks." She brushed a lock of hair that had escaped her ponytail behind her ear. "I didn't think you'd be up for saying that after I hit that last pitch of yours."

"It's just a game, Chris." He responded. "I wanted to win, but I still respect how you played it."

She folded her arms. "Something tells me you like to play a lot of games."

He smirked. "So many things in life are more fun when you make it a game. Why not enjoy it?"

"Is patient care a game to you?"

He rolled his eyes. "Come on, Chris. I'm not heartless. If I hadn't thought that Mass Kenmore could give Stephanie better care than Edenbrook, I wouldn't have offered it."

He leaned closer to her. "You would have done the same if the situation was reversed."

Chris hesitated. "You're right. I would have."

He smiled at her. "You and I are more alike than you think."

She laughed, shaking her head. "I wouldn't go that far."

"No?" He placed his hand upon his chin as if considering that. "I guess I'll have to work harder to prove it to you."

He pushed off from his car and opened the passenger door for her. "Want me to give you a ride home?"

Biting her lip, Chris shook her head. "I don't think I'm going home just yet."

"Where are you going?" He glanced around the nearly empty parking lot. "Looks like everyone else left to party without you."

She shrugged. "I'm not really in a celebratory mood."

"What kind of mood are you in?" He asked.

"Honestly, I'm not sure. I guess I'm more restless than anything else."

"Well, how about I drive you around until you decide what you want to do?" He offered.

"Okay."

She slid into his car. Her heart started picking up speed when she realized this would be the first time she was actually alone with him.

"Where were you going?" She asked once he buckled up.

"Home." He replied with a grin. "To drink my loss away."

She couldn't help but laugh. "I wouldn't mind a drink."

He turned towards her. "And just where would you like to have this drink?"

"I'm not really up for a bar." She admitted.

"My place or yours?" He asked.

"Who said anything about us drinking together?" She teased.

"Why waste this rare opportunity to do that very thing?" He countered.

"True." She relaxed back into the seat. "Let's go to your place."

Cutting her eyes towards him, she noticed his smug smile forming.

"Don't think anything other than a drink is going to happen." She warned.

"Whatever you say." He winked at her.

*****************

One drink and some flirting later, the two wound up in his shower. As the warm water fell upon them, they did all they could to heat the other's skin until they burned.

Chris ran her hands down his body as he kissed her neck. Her pent up frustrations with her life and work demanded she take advantage of her situation. She needed this release, almost as much as she wanted the man driving her on to give in to her every desire.

Ethan's words echoed in her mind, causing her to pause in her caresses.

The thing was, she wanted to burn. Even if it was just for this one night, she wanted to simply sate her passionate nature with no worries about what the morning would bring.

Tobias began to kiss down her body. He noticed her furrowed brow and lack of movement. He knew he needed to work on drawing her back into the night he was imagining.

He reached over and turned the water off, before urging her out.

"You're distracted." He said, handing her a towel. "Do you not want this?"

Chris paused in drying off. "No, I want you."

He stepped closer, all his usual cockiness nowhere in sight.

"Good. Because I've wanted you from the moment I first saw you."

"Right." Chris sarcastically replied. "I'm sure I really caught your eye at that diner."

He settled his arms around her waist.

"I noticed you immediately." He softly brushed his lips against hers. "Each time I saw you after that, I wanted you more and more."

His deep voice admitting to something like that, even though she doubted the sincerity, made her move right back into his embrace. Her lips sought his, and the two raced right back into the inferno they'd started.

Stumbling back into his bedroom, they fell upon the bed, limbs tangling as they continued to kiss.

Tobias moaned as Chris rolled on top of him. Deciding to relax and see what she'd do next, he urged her to take the reins.

His breath hitched the moment she kissed him. Her body moved over his, teasing and promising so much more. He cupped her face, looking into her eyes as she caressed him.

"You have no idea how often I've fantasized about this." He murmured, pulling her down for another kiss.

"Show me." She arched into his heated touch. "I want to do everything you thought about."

That was all he needed to hear.

*****************

As light began to filter through the slits of the bedroom blinds, Chris and Tobias collapsed exhausted on his bed.

Trying to catch her breath, Chris looked over at him. When he turned towards her, a breathless laugh popped out.

"You have some imagination there." She teased.

He chuckled, scooting closer to her. "That was only half of what I've fantasized."

"You're kidding?" Chris smiled at him. "I don't think I have the energy to see what else is in store."

She stretched, drawing his appreciative gaze towards her lithe body.

"There's always later." He reminded her. "Say like tonight?"

"Why Dr. Carrick," she snuggled closer within his arms. "Are you asking me out?"

"That depends." He pressed a lingering kiss to her lips.

"On?"

"If the answer is yes."

She laughed, shaking her head over how good she felt in this moment with him.

"That's a definite yes."

"Then I'm asking you out." He chuckled when she softly groaned.

"You're lucky you're cute." She teased.

"I know." He sighed. "It's both a curse and a blessing."

"You poor, poor man." She patted his cheek.

Tobias took her hand and pressed a kiss within her palm. His eyes found hers as she laced their fingers together.

"How about dinner first?"

"So, it's a real date?" She joked.

"Ummhmm." He rolled over on his back, tucking her in beside him. "Is that still a yes?"

"I will need energy to begin whatever round we're on." She replied.

"Yes, you will." He squeezed her close.

"Then, I guess I'll see you later."

She began to ease out of his bed, only to be dragged back within his arms.

"Where do you think you're going?" He murmured against her neck while dotting kisses along it.

"Home." She relaxed back within his arms.

"No need to rush off so soon." He urged her back under the covers.

"I'll stay if you let me sleep." She warned. "If I don't get a few hours, there's no way I'll be any fun later tonight."

"We can't have that." He laughed when she poked him in his ribs.

She curled up against his side. Her eyes closed and she felt her body relax completely. It'd been a while since she felt so blissfully carefree.

It was a feeling she didn't want to end.

******************

Weeks went by in blur. Chris seemed to find her stride in both her professional life and her personal life. That one night with Tobias had blossomed into a weekly date night, adding even more happiness.

She knew she was falling for him. It was difficult not to. He had the ability to get her mind off the possible shutdowns that loomed over their hospitals. His humor and unending charm kept her thoughts firmly in the moment instead of the fears of the future.

Plus the closeness that was developing between them made her care all the more.

She didn't know which she loved most, the amazing sex or the talks they would have afterwards. The nights spent with him ended up being the best part of her week.

Whatever it was, she wasn't going to question it.

The only problem was June Hirata.

Chris was still a bit uneasy around the diagnostician. Seeing how two-faced the woman could be made it hard to completely trust working with her.

Then one day June approached the team with an idea.

"Did you know Senator Ed Farruiga's at Mass Kenmore?"

"No." Chris replied.

"Apparently he has some illness that no one can figure out." She paused to make sure she had everyone's attention. "I think we should encourage him to come here."

Ethan leaned back in his chair in thought. Baz seemed a little uncertain about the idea.

"I would love to give it a go, but we can't just go take one of their patients." He argued.

"Why not? No one has to stay at a hospital where they aren't getting the best possible care. Can you imagine how much publicity we would get if we helped another famous face?" June glanced at Ethan. "It would help us be able to help more people who really need us."

"It would." He conceded. "And we are a better team than Carrick's."

"Are we really going to do what they did with Stephanie?" Chris asked.

"Don't you want some payback for that?" June countered. "We lost a huge grant! They don't need the Senator as much as we do."

Chris didn't like the idea of continuing the game they'd started with Leland Bloom, especially with how close she'd gotten to their opponent.

"Let's do it." Ethan decided, needing a chance to get back at Tobias.

As they worked out a plan of attack, June checked her messages.

"My contact says that Dr. Carrick and his team haven't diagnosed the cause yet. They have only begun the process of ordering lab work."

She looked at the clock. "Given how long it takes for Mass Kenmore's lab techs to come around for blood samples, I say we have an hour tops to poach him."

"Then let's get going." Ethan ordered.

******************

It took less than an hour to find the senator and to convince him to transfer to Edenbrook. As she followed Baz out of the hospital, Chris heard the one voice she wished to avoid.

"Chris?" Tobias called out. "What are you doing here?"

He noticed the senator further ahead of her, changed and in the process of signing discharge papers.

His eyes narrowed when he realized what was going on.

"Look, I--" Chris tried to apologize.

"Save it." He snapped. "I don't want to hear it."

Without giving her a chance, he stormed back the way he came.

***************

Later that night, Chris headed to a bar she knew Tobias liked to frequent. He'd already ignored her calls and texts. If she was ever going to have the chance to explain, she knew it'd have to be in person.

It didn't take long to find him in the crowd. What surprised her was who was sitting with him.

What is June doing here?

The way the two were laughing and talking, it was obvious they knew each other a little too well.

The more she observed, the angrier Chris became.

"Chris!" June greeted. "I didn't expect to see you here."

"Really?" Chris folded her arms. "I'm surprised. I thought you made certain to know where all your pawns are."

June laughed. "Only the most naive make the best pawns. You've been my favorite by far, Chris."

Tobias eyed her then glanced up at Chris.

June leaned closer to him, placing her hand on his thigh. "Our games are so much fun, aren't they?"

Chris was beyond livid. For months June had used her in every situation. Now to see that Tobias was in on whatever manipulative game they were playing caused her to snap.

She lunged forward almost punching June in her smug face. The table had stopped her momentum right before contact, giving Tobias a chance to grab her around the waist and pull her back.

Chris struggled against him. Her Scottish accent became thicker than usual as she unleashed a flurry of insults upon the pair.

"Let me go, you wee fuckbumper!" She shouted. "I'm going to show that dug licking pish aff a nettle just what happens when she messes with me!"

"Chris!" Tobias grunted when her elbows struck his ribs. "Calm the hell down!"

June began to laugh harder while watching the pair.

"This is the best you can do?" She taunted Chris. "Oh my god, I can't believe I actually thought you might be worthy competition."

"Bolt, ya mangled fud!" Chris yelled.

Still snickering, June gathered her things and headed towards the door.

"Call me Carrick when you're ready to be with a real woman again."

With a last burst of energy, Chris tried to break free of Tobias. She needed to knock June down just once. Her rage demanded to feel that woman's face under her fist.

Tobias yanked her back and half dragged her out the back door.

Once they were outside, he let her go.

They were both panting and glaring at one another.

"What the shit was that?!" He snapped. "If you'd actually touched June, she'd have had your ass in jail so fast it'd have made that hot head of yours spin."

"Do you know what that means?" He demanded when Chris remained defiant. "That means your career would be over!"

"Piss off." Chris hissed at him. "Ya lavvy-heided wankstain."

"Fuck this." Tobias rubbed his hands over his face. "I don't even know why I'm bothering to talk some sense into you."

"I don't either." Chris fought back tears.

"Why did you come here?" He asked when she fell silent. "Just to rub it in that you too can steal a patient?"

"Weren't you the man who said it was all a game?" She shot back. "And if I knew Edenbrook was the best for someone, then I should make it happen?"

"Damnit." He muttered. "Look, June told me you were determined to make me pay for my little stunt with Stephanie."

"That I was?" Chris released another profanity laden tirade.

The more descriptive she got, the more Tobias struggled with his laughter. He was still furious over everything, but he couldn't help but be impressed with her imaginative use of curse words.

After a particularly long sentence about June's reputation with men, all the fire seemed to go out in Chris.

She slumped back against the brick wall of the bar and lowered her head into her hands.

"I know you won't believe me." She began. "But this wasn't my idea."

Against his better judgement, Tobias moved a little closer and leaned next to her.

"What happened?" He asked.

The whole story poured out along with Chris's guilt.

"We never should have gotten close." She added at the end. "Not with all the animosity between the hospitals."

Tobias took a deep breath and slowly released it. "Do you regret it?"

"Stealing your patient?" She slowly nodded. "I don't think it was worth it."

"Not that." He turned towards her. "Us?"

She looked up at him. "No."

Her face scrunched as if she was about to cry. "I mean, I do since you and June had your own thing going at the same time. I know you and I weren't serious, but to have actually been with someone who could be with that two-faced bitch--"

"I wasn't seeing her while seeing you." Tobias interrupted.

She still looked doubtful.

"Come on, Chris." He rubbed the back of his neck. "You know. You have to have seen that what we have is..."

He cursed, kicking at some trash.

"What we have is what? She prodded.

He groaned then yanked her into a heady kiss.

She wrapped her arms around him, giving back as good as she got.

Tobias stumbled back from the passion in her kiss, hitting the wall with her locked in his arms.

When it came to an end, he lifted his head to look into her eyes.

"See?" He said softly.

She slowly nodded.

"Then don't say we shouldn't have gotten together." He cuddled her close.

"What about my part in the senator?" She looked up at him. "Can you let that go?"

"Yes." He tightened his arms around her. "Of course I can."

"Then why didn't you answer my calls?"

"Because June made it seem like you'd strung me along to keep me from suspecting anything when you did eventually steal a patient." He admitted. "Knowing that I'd fallen for you, it stung that you didn't feel the same way. That I was merely your pawn in all this."

"I hate her." Chris bit out.

Tobias snorted. "Yeah, she isn't the easiest person to be around."

Chris bit back the fact he'd found her easy enough to sleep with.

Tobias sighed. "Want me to take you home?"

"No." Chris mumbled. "I'm too keyed up to see my roommates."

A tender smile began to form as he recalled a similar conversation they'd once had.

"Want me to drive you around until you calm down?"

Chris looked up at him, recalling the night of the softball game. Seeing that he remembered it too made her melt against him.

"I'd love that."

Keeping one arm around her waist, Tobias led her to his car.

[dollywheeler]

September 27th, 1996

Dear diary,

I fumbled.

I fumbled and almost made the wrong turn and I could have died.

I could have died on the spot and it would have been less awful.

It's so embarrassing I can barely think back on it, but I can't stop. It keeps playing through my head again and again.

Everything started so great - the gymnasium was loud and colorful and bright, and everything I love about game days.

The gymnasium was crowded too - every student and teacher, and even some of the girls that graduated last June. Hell, mom and dad were there. Of course they are there when I mess up! I wanted them to see how good I was getting, not fumbling around like a complete idiot!

I really don't know what happened; I've never made a mistake like that ever. I'd been so looking forward to it, working so hard to make sure I knew the routine by heart. I should have been able to do it in my sleep.

I just managed to keep it together until the game started up again and I could sneak out into the hallway. I'm sure at least one of the girls saw me leave, but they know I usually do this when I fuck up so they let me be. I haven't needed to since Freshman year - I've been working so hard exactly so this wouldn't happen again.

I still don't know why I do it. Obviously it's better to hide, where no one can see me until my skin stops itching and I stop feeling like everyone is staring at me. But I also know it's counterproductive. I know it just makes me sink deeper into my failure, know that I'll just be miserable and alone if I run away. But I can't stop it - I just can't stand being around that many people anymore.

The last time had been at an away game - some school closer to Chicago that I can't even remember. The best I could do there was some alcove in a dark hallway. At home I knew where to go. It had been a while since I had gone out there, but the bench on the far side of the building was still there, far enough from the gymnasium that it was always quiet and empty. No one wandered far enough from the game to find it.

It was starting to get dark, the sky a deep purple, which was nice but also strange. Usually it's already fully dark out, and it feels like there's more cover. I still felt too exposed now, even sitting there curled up with my arms wrapped around my knees. I'd forgotten my jacket.

"There you are." I jumped at the sudden voice, not expecting anyone to have followed me. Even if I had, the last person I would have expected to see was Mike. He was slightly out of breath as if he'd had to run to catch up to me. I hadn't even noticed he was at the game, though it stood to reason he wouldn't have sat with the other teachers just yet.

He came to a stop in front of me, suddenly slightly awkward as he looked me over. "Hey."

I honestly didn't know what to say so I just stared at him, baffled he was there in the first place. No one ever followed me. And suddenly Mike had appeared out of nowhere, blipped into existence when I had spent the last few years trying to forget he even exists. He's not supposed to exist - just a negative space in the last seven years of my life.

"I know you're not a fan of me but-," he started, fumbling over his words as he inched closer to the bench. "I just wanted to check up on you."

"I didn't even know you were here." I frowned, swallowing against the knot in my throat, my voice shaky even to my own ears. I wanted him to leave. I didn't want to be alone. "I thought you had plans this weekend."

"Uh, yeah - the party's back in town. Well, everyone except Dustin because he has some conference or whatever, but... uh, yeah, we were planning to come to the game. We wanted to come see your show. El and Max are here too. Lucas tried but he's not really a fan of basketball anymore so he left early..."

He rambles a lot, I noticed, sounding nothing like he does when I overhear him talking to just Will. In class, he rambles a lot too, but at least there he's doing so with purpose, knowing what he's saying and when to stop. It made him look awkward and out of place, as if it's me that's making him nervous. As if I'm not just the little sister that's nine years too immature for him, shoved into the corner of the room with a pile of dolls so I'm out of the way.

"Great," I told him, my misery finally making me cave and scooting over to make space for Mike on the bench. He seemed surprised, hesitant still to join me, which I had to admit was kind of funny. Still, I sobered up again quickly enough, a shiver running through me at the memory. "At least one person that didn't see me completely humiliate myself."

"Come on, Holzie." Mike nudged my shoulder, and I was thrown off guard by the new nickname, pulling my attention away from my spinning thoughts. "It really wasn't that obvious. I noticed at least two girls that were out of step the entire routine - you made one tiny mistake that no one will remember."

"It's that I made the mistake at all," I corrected him, and to my dismay and complete mortification, my voice cracked. "I'm not the best if I make stupid mistakes like that. And if I'm not the best I'll never make cheer captain and I'll just be one more girl on the cheerleading team that no one really-" cares about is what I was going to say, but luckily I cut myself off before I could finish. I know it's stupid. Know everyone is important. There's not a girl on the team I wouldn't miss - but that's because they're my friends.

For once I want people to notice me for me. I want to make a mark to people that don't know me at all. Want people to see me, notice me, because of me, not because they already know about me.

Worse, I started crying in front of the last person on earth I wanted to cry in front of. The only person in the world who I've spent my entire life trying to convince I'm not a baby anymore. There's just something about Mike that always makes me feel younger than I am. Inadequate.

"You will," Mike assured me, "no one works harder than you."

I was confused what made him think that. How he would know. It's not something I like to advertise, and it only made me cry harder. Because that's the point - I have to work twice as hard to be half as good as everyone else. Everyone else gets it with the six hours practice we have a week - they're flawless, make no mistakes at all. It's just not fair.

And I'm so tired of trying to catch up.

I desperately tried to wipe my tears away as quickly as possible as we sat in silence for a while, Mike leaning closer and handing me a tissue he pulled from his pocket. For some reason, it always helps me stop crying once I can wipe my face dry, physically putting myself together, so I was grateful even if I was completely embarrassed.

"I'm sorry, I used to be good at this," Mike chuckled, trying to lighten the mood as he nudged my shoulder again. "It's been a while."

If he were, I don't remember it.

I told him we should get back inside, even though that was the last thing I wanted to do. But Daniel was still playing, and I couldn't stay gone from the team forever either, so I sucked it up. I just hoped I could stop by the bathroom to make sure I didn't look like a complete nutcase - which was a terrible idea because of course I did, now I just knew exactly how fucked I looked.

Before we entered the gymnasium Mike stopped me.

He told me he'd seen me practicing on the field sometimes.

After everything I seriously couldn't be any more embarrassed so I just shrugged and confirmed it, even though I was confused as to where he was going with it. I also hadn't considered anyone showing up early being able to see me, so it was good to know for the future.

"I know I can't tell you what to do but... please don't practice without the team - at least not the crazy gymnastic jump things." I blinked at him in surprise, perplexed at his request. It's not like I was in anyone's way or bothering anyone, but he explained it was dangerous and didn't want me to fall and get hurt with no one around to get help. And it didn't feel like a scolding - I mean I felt stupid for not having thought about that myself, but for some reason i didn't care about any of that.

I promised I wouldn't anymore, and as we entered the gymnasium I automatically searched out mom and dad. Dad was watching the game, but mom is usually bored by the game itself, so it wasn't a surprise that she'd been looking out for me, immediately noticing us by the door. It stood to reason she'd already deduced Mike had been at the game too, but she seemed content to wait for the dinner to talk to him again because she just smiled at us before looking at the game now she knew we were okay.

Mike asked if I wanted to come sit by him and his friends for a bit. Now I knew to look for them I found them easily enough in the left top corner of the bleachers on their side of the court - Max was the most obvious with her bright hair, and from there it was easy to find Will and El sitting on either side of her. I know El the least out of all of Mike's friends, which I've always found strange because I'm pretty sure they dated at some point and before Mike and Will had moved back, she'd been the one hanging around Hawkins the most often. Even from that far away I could see her expressive features, and she hadn't had those pink streaks in her hair the last time I'd seen her. They suited her.

I'd like to talk to Max again, thank her in person for helping Mike pick out my birthday present, but of course, even if I wanted to take Mike up on his offer, I couldn't, having to go sit with the rest of the team. I could already see Dylan smiling at me and beckoning me closer, so I just dismissed Mike. I thanked him though, because even though he hadn't been much help in making me feel better, it had been nice that he'd followed me. That he'd sat with me.

Maybe tomorrow I'll get my sense back.

For now I'm too worn out to be angry.

At least I think writing has helped me calm down enough from my embarrassment to sleep.

Love, Holly

[hananoami]

[ Directional Orbit ] Ice - Stage 120 Clear VOD

This post is very late but I've finally cleared Zayne's Directional Orbit: Ice - Stage 120 on June 9th! He is the second love interest to have successfully clear all the Deepspace Trials currently available. If I were to be honest, his last stage really gave me a lot of trouble in spite of him having the most high leveled memories out of the three in my collection. I'll go into more details about that below. For now I want to give attention to what you should expect from this particular stage. At this time Stage 120 is the final stage available for Zayne's Directional Orbit: Ice. Like all x0 stages with red hues around its orbit this stage will require you to use two separate teams. Team 01's Protofield Stellactrum is 6-Ruby memories and Team 02's Protofield Stellactrum is 6-Sapphire memories. Matching the Protofield Stellactrum will grant you additional bonuses to your team. By matching the colors completely you will have a 'perfect match' which allows you to break 2 protofield shields in a single strike. This will ultimately save you some time by quickly bringing those wanderers into a weakened state. You also get an Attribute Bonus (up to 30.0%) for every color you match - increase DMG boost 5.0% and DMG reduction 5.0%. Of course, you could opt to go off color and try to brute force it. That's what I ended up doing for these fights. I don't mean to sound repetitive when I say this, but I still want to reiterate that there is no right or wrong way to play the game. Game play will vary from player to player. You have to take into consideration the memories you have in your collection, protocores used, their stat attributes, levels, etc. So I hope you wont be discouraged as you work on your own trials. If it's any consolation know that I am cheering for you, and am always willing to help~! Fighting!! ଘ(੭˃ᴗ˂)੭♡

Okay, let's rewind to when I first unlocked this orbit. Zayne was actually the first love interest to reach Stage 120, much thanks to the sheer amount of love and dedication I put into his Sapphire build. Low key I was pretty confident that he would also be the first one to clear stage 120... that is until then I saw the all ruby Protofield Stellactrum for Team 01-- I knew i was gonna be in trouble. (｡>﹏<) If you've been following along with my Deepspace Trials journey, ever since I've been playing this game and blogging about it, it's well known that his Ruby sets always give me so much grief. [Neon Night] was the last memory I was missing, but after 79 days it made is first appearance on 04/06 after roughly ~2k pulls since I started playing on day one. This memory eluding me became a meme amongst my friends so of course I had to write about it coming home. Originally, during my first attempt on 05/14, I had his 4-star NT solar pair equipped but historically for some reason I was never able clear any of his orbits that used all ruby. I opted to brute force those stages by going off color, however, that isn't possible to do here. Which is why I mentioned in my prog notes for this stage I was going to take a hiatus from any attempts until I was able to obtain his new ruby solar myth pair on 06/07 -- but that's a whole different story. After I got those SF memories and leveled them up it was time to go back in and see what I could do in order to finally clear this stage. During my early attempts my teams looked like this: Team 01 with 6-Ruby memories (Master of Fate build) and Team 02 with 6-Sapphire memories (Foreseer build). I chose to match the Protofield Stellactrum for now to see how things would play out. Real talk the damage output difference between a 4-star solar pair and a 5-star solar pair is kinda ridiculous. I had previously struggled to clear the first half, but with Master of Fate it was a breeze. I was finally able to see and prog the second half of the fight with Foreseer on 06/08, but wasn't able to clear the fight in the end. I thought maybe it was a protocore difference, as most of the memories I had for that half were max level (minus the 4-star memories, those were at 70). During the hiatus I focused on leveling up his sapphire protocores, yet it still wasn't enough. My mind was thinking of what else I could do in order to close the final gap between my prog and a clear. So I decided to do a different strat taken from a different playbook that I used in my previous 120 clears (open orbit / Xavier's Directional Orbit: Light) which was to swap my solar memories, but keep the respective lunar memories for team. Now here is where things got spicy.

Remember when I said I was confident with Foreseer? That notion quickly faded as I was struggling to clear the first half (2x lv 80-FS, 4x lv 70 ruby lunars). By this point all of the lunar protocores were maxed out at +15, yet I still wasn't doing enough damage to clear the first half of the stage before the timer ran out.

Okay then, since I can't level up protocores anymore and don't want to farm protocores with hopes to find better ones I decided to level up one of the lunar memories to max. The pattern was level up a ruby memory to 80 > run an attempt > fail > repeat until all of the ruby memories I had equipped were level 80.

AND EVEN AFTER ALL THAT EFFORT I STILL HAD TROUBLE... HAHAHA 💀

૮₍ ˃ ⤙ ˂ ₎ა

Like damn, Foreseer what happened to you?! It wasn't an easy fight to clear and I struggled to do enough damage before the timer ran out since I wasn't able to shatter the protofield shields in a single strike. That's the down side of going off color and trying to brute force it. Yet I was stubborn. I was so determined to clear this fight with Foreseer... and for one of my attempts I was super duper close! I had 1% left on my last wanderer's HP, but due to my mistake of trying to multitask / stream the fight for my friends mid combat, I wasn't able to finish the job and failed that run. Out of all of my defeats this one hurt me the most. Needless to say I WAS SO TILTED I ACTUALLY CRIED OUT OF FRUSTRATION. Hard lesson learned: don't turn on a stream until after you cleared the fight. I thought Foreseer would be able to finish the job, but the timer got the best of him. I was so upsetti.

For the next hour I kept going at it. Miserably might I add. There were countless defeats, but none of them even came close that one run that tilted me off this astral plane. Eventually I got lucky and had the wanderers group up at the end so I completely shatter their shields to AoE them down with my < ARDENT OATH >.

My advice to anyone attempting this fight is to try and stick close / focus on the CARMINE TALON first. Auto target is shit, but at least by sticking close to those the THUNDEROAR will jump to you instead of you trying to chase them down... Of course, if you're going off color you'll need to press your abilities on cooldown in order to bring them into a weakened state as fast as you can. Having Duo Rank 1 for Foreseer meant I didn't need to have a Oath Recovery Boost beta protocore equipped, but if you don't have that then you'll definitely need to use one here.

FINALLY, after all that pain and suffering I was able to get back to my prog point.

Because this was my first day using Master of Fate's kit in an actual timed battle my runs with him were very sloppy... I've mentioned in an earlier post using the demo they provided in the events page that his kit felt very quick and spammy. Even after doing some research on the Love and Deepspace community groups, every one also agreed that his blade play style using [Sacred Rainfall] was very fast...

For this build I had two +9 Ruby Expedited Energy Boost beta protocores on the SF memory pair. Because I didn't have much practice with this blade I just spammed all of my abilities with hopes I didn't accidentally overwrite / cancel any of them. It'll take some time to get the timing down with patience and more practice, but at this point of the night I was so down bad for a clear I just wanted to get this fight done and over with since I was still upset from that 1% defeat in the first half of the stage. It took me a while to bring the final boss into a weakened state because I did not have a perfect match. So it was crucial to use resonance skill on cooldown as soon as it came back up. The three charges you get after using it is an interesting kit, but slightly confusing cause we never had something like this before. Still, I made an effort to press everything on CD anyway so my timer wasn't off. If possibly I would also highly suggest you try to get perfect dodges for the extra support damage. I want to say a lot of time and resources went into obtaining this clear. And when I say a LOT I seriously mean it. The diamonds and irl currency used to obtain R3 Master of Fate. The amount of stamina that was dedicated into farming protocores, bottle of wishes, and ascension materials. This clear was not something I was able to do in one go, but took me almost a month to do. I understand that not many can replicate what I've done and I'm not saying you need to do what I did in order to clear. The purpose of this post/blog is for me to reflect on my journey and to share my experience. The happy moments, the sad moments, and even the ones that were upsetting-- I'm glad I found a way to use this space as a positive outlet. Thank you all for taking the time to read all of this, and for following along my deepspace trials progression. As always if anyone has any questions or wants additional tips/advice with their own battles I would be more than happy to help to the best of my ability.

ADDITIONAL SCREENSHOTS

Companion: Zayne's Foreseer [ Defend | DMG | AoE ] Weapon: Everlasting Song [ Support | AoE | Heal ] Attribute Bonus For each matched stellactrum, increases DMG Boost 5.0% (currently increased: 20.0%) and DMG Reduction 5.0% (currently increased 20.0%). ♡ Affinity Bonus: 97 (Zayne’s Protective Skill) When you take a fatal blow, Zayne teleports to you, blocks a hit, and counter attacks. Enemies will be knocked back. [ HP 3xxx || DEF xx || ATK xxx ] Pair Bonus [ FS ] - Starting Effect: increases team DMG by 8%, and reduces team DMG taken by 8%. When fighting together with Foreseer, your Active Skill DMG is increased by 25%. - Duo Rank 1: boosts Ardent Oath charge by 20%. When you and Foreseer are granted with Wards of Curses, team DMG will be increased by 12%.

5☆ FOREVER SEALED (sapphire/solar) Lv 80/ awakened rank 2 using +9 and +14 SSR protocores

5☆ PROMISE EVERLASTING (sapphire/solar) Lv 80/ awakened rank 1 using +9 and +15 SSR protocores

5☆ COZY AFTERNOON (ruby/lunar) Lv 80 rank 3 using +12 SSR protocores

5☆ DRUNKEN INTIMACY (ruby/lunar) Lv 80 using +9 and +12 SSR protocores

5☆ MEDICAL RESCUE (ruby/lunar) Lv 80 using +9 and +12 SSR protocores

5☆ EXCLUSIVE TUTORIAL (ruby/lunar) Lv 80 using +9 and +12 SSR protocores

Companion: Zayne's Master of Fate [ DPS | Burst | Sustained ] Weapon: Sacred Rainfall [ DPS | Burst | Single-target ] Attribute Bonus For each matched stellactrum, increases DMG Boost 5.0% (currently increased: 20.0%) and DMG Reduction 5.0% (currently increased 20.0%). ♡ Affinity Bonus: 97 (Zayne’s Protective Skill) When you take a fatal blow, Zayne teleports to you, blocks a hit, and counter attacks. Enemies will be knocked back. [ HP 38xx || DEF xx || ATK xxx ] Pair Bonus [ SF ] - Starting Effect: increases team DMG by 8%, and reduces DMG taken by 8%. When the enemy is in [Shattered Jade] state, reduces its DEF by 10%. - Duo Rank 1: boosts Ardent Oath charge by 20%. When fighting alongside Master of Fate, the enemy's weakened state is extended by 2 seconds. Each time an enemy in weakened state is hit, the damage it sustains increases by 0.5%, up to a maximum of 10%. - Duo Rank 2: increases Energy Charge cap by 1. When [Jadesunder] is triggered, restores a small amount of Energy Charge. - Duo Rank 3: increase team DMG by 8%. Increases DMG of [Jadesunder] by 100%. When [Orchid Metamorphosis] is replaced by [Piercing Rain], there's one more attempt of using [Piercing Rain] hitting an enemy. The cooldown reduction can be triggered once when unleashing [Piercing Rain].

5☆ SNOWFALL ENCOUNTER (ruby/solar) Lv 80/ awakened rank 3 using +9 and +12 SSR protocores

5☆ SNOWFALL EMBRACE (ruby/solar) Lv 80/ awakened rank 3 using +9 and +12 SSR protocores

5☆ HEARTS WITHIN REACH (sapphire/lunar) Lv 80 rank 1 using +15 SSR protocores

5☆ BUSINESS TRIP (sapphire/lunar) Lv 80/ awakened rank 3 using +15 SSR protocores

4☆ FRAGMENTED DREAMS (sapphire/lunar) Lv 70 rank 3 using +12 SSR protocores

4☆ EVERLASTING SNOWDROP (sapphire/lunar) Lv 70 rank 3 using +12 and +15 SSR protocores

[doctorstrangereview]

0055: Strange Tales #160

Cover Date: September 1967 On-Sale Date: June 1, 1967

This issue gives us the return of Baron Mordo who has been mostly absent for over a year. The series does maintain some continuity as Mordo is still wearing his strange onesie over his bodysuit costume. Raymond Marais takes over writing duties starting this issue. I don't know who he is, but he seems to have a number of stories credited to him in the Grand Comics Database. Ms. Severin retains the art chores. And, toward the end, we see the return of another character from the very early days.

Doc is the midst of a throng of Mordo's new minions. Their rather dull robes, all identical, are a very good match for the walls of their cavern they occupy. Doc is like "Buzz off minions, I need to talk to the manager!"

Doc informs Mordo that the Ancient One was stoned (ha!) to death and now I've got his goodies. This makes Mordo made and he threatens to obliterate Doc. So nothing new here. Mordo attacks Doc who sweeps him aside with a gesture further enraging Mordo. Doc attempts to explain the whole Living Tribunal situation even showing a neat image of the Sands of Death hourglass ticking away at Stonehenge. Mordo is unconvinced. Mordo tries a few more tricks then says Uncle. But he hasn't given up, but has his minions attack Doc en masse.

The minions attack as they shout their rather uninspired threats. Because they're pretty uncoordinated they don't provide much of a challenge to Doc.

Doc grabs the guy in the turban from last issue is the instigator of all this bother. He carries him away as Mordo attempts to reassert his control of the minion rabble. Meanwhile, in a dark corner of the cave system, Doc strips the turban dude of his newfound powers and sends him back home. The turban dude, apparently, was the nexus of control for the minion rabble.

As Mordo regains control, and we see a mysterious woman complain, Doc makes a dramatic entrance.

Then Doc casts a dramatic spell over the throng of new minions.

Finally, Doc forces Mordo's ghost out of his body.

Doc explains the whole Living Tribunal situation again to Mordo. He reunites Mordo's ghost with his body. Mordo now turns back into a cowering, quaking bumbler who now wants nothing more than to leave the planet before Trib-y wipes it out. Doc responds by freezing Mordo and basically saying "Won't help me? If I die, so do you!" Doc then makes the mistake of removing the evil influence from one of Mordo's new minions and forces it into Mordo. Of course, instead of Doc's intended effect, it makes him stronger. A brief interlude reveals the identity of the mysterious woman. Victoria Bently, whom Doc rescued after being nasty to a cab driver for no reason, has returned!

Mordo agrees to help Doc and together they exorcise the remaining minions. Mordo absorbs all this extra power with the expected response.

The empowered Mordo strikes down Doc.

I think Raymond Marais did a pretty decent job on his first story, continuing a plot started by Roy Thomas. Aside from shoehorning in Victoria Bentley into the mix and revealing her identity in a very awkward manner, the story flows well. Mordo actually appears formidable until his natural cowardice takes over. And once he gains additional power he's all arrogant again. Truly a whatever way the wind blows villain. It's a good setup for what is to come. Victoria's introduction into the story may not have been graceful, but she's got a major role to play in the upcoming months. Now Mordo really needs to loose the onesie.

[sippinggossip]

From dearest Info Anon...

Info anon here and I'm back to give you a blast from the past as a Christmas treat, since admin so kindly asked for old gossip;)

This story is about our dear frontman and his fondness of a certain Italian actress called Benedetta Porcaroli.

Most of you probably know Benedetta from the Italian Netflix series "Baby", in which she starred alongside Alice Pagani. And that's how Damiano met her too :)

In 2018, Måneskin's biggest hit at the time, Torna a casa, is used as part of the new series soundtrack. Måneskin attend the premiere of the series in Milan on 30/11/2018 and perform "Torna a casa" live. Damiano follows Benedetta back on Instagram (only member of the cast he followed at the time) and likes her post about the premiere.

A few days later, on 01/12, a video of the "Baby" cast and Måneskin playing a game drops on the YouTube channel of Netflix Italia. Damiano and Benedetta are sitting next to each other and are on the cover of the video. The video is called "Il cast di baby sfida i Måneskin a 'Obbligo o Segreto'" and the vibe between Damiano and Benedetta who, at the time it was filmed, had just recently met is undoubtedly very…comfortable.

There's not any other public interaction between them for months until something interesting happens: when Damiano breaks up with Giorgia in April 2019, he starts liking Benedetta's posts again. And not just liking her posts: they're hanging out too as Benedetta lets us know when she posts this selfie with Damiano on May 8th 2019.

But something even more interesting happens when he and Giorgia get back together in late May/ early June: soon after, Damiano unfollows Benedetta. I wonder why he would do that, since they seemed to be such good friends :)

They don't interact again for years (at least publicly) and Benedetta is with other men until they meet again at the Gucci Cosmogonie event in May 2022. There are multiple videos of them from that night talking to each other and in one the conversation does look a bit tense. Admin please insert the videos I've sent you on email because I can't add them here :)

In November 2022, Benedetta is in LA while Maneskin are also there. She posts a photo with Vic on 12/11 and - a miracle - Damiano follows her again on Instagram. And not just follows: he starts liking her posts again on a regular basis. At the time, Giorgia is away in India filming Pecchino express without access to social media.

On February 24th 2023, Måneskin and Benedetta reunite at the Gucci fashion show in Milan. Damiano & Benedetta seem to be in a much better mood around each other now ;)

Multiple paparazzi photos of Damiano and Benedetta from that day appear. In some of them they are arriving at the show and she seems to be lightly holding him.

In others, they're having lunch. Giorgia is nowhere in sight even though she was there in Milan with him those days. The headline is "Damiano and the Porcaroli, a couple you didn't expect." The article clarifies though that there's not any type of cheating and that he's still with Giorgia while Benedetta was publicly single (is it cheating though if the relationship is open? ;)

In light of this content, Damiano stops interacting with Benedetta's posts on social media for about a month but soon starts again in March.

Almost 2 months after the Gucci fashion show took place, Benedetta posts a photo with Måneskin from the event.

And, that's the end. No interactions since. I'm leaving you to reach your own conclusions, but to me this relationship definitely wasn't a simple friendship;) I should point out that in summer 2023 Benedetta publicly reconnected with her ex, Italian actor Riccardo Scamarcio. He's 19 years older than her and they're still together. So, the time Damiano stopped interacting with her online probably coincides with when she got back with him in private.

Please maintain my anonymity dear admin and don't forget to add the videos I sent ;) Hope you all enjoyed this piece of information and let me know what you think;)

(Videos coming soon)

Wow, thank you once again, info anon!

I remember seeing the paparazzi photos and the tabloid article before, but now I know more about what happened.

Is it me, or do Italians tend to get back with their exes a lot?

[bilightningwhumper]

Mangst 2024- Day 15

<<Previous . Masterlist . Next>>

Caged Bird (Swan Lake) Masterlist

"We'll get through this together."

Summary:

Rosalin comes to comfort Leslie after the DNA results. (follows after the events of Day 3 "You don't remember, do you?" in this Mangst 2024 collection) Potential spoiler excerpt from "Caged Bird"

Notes:

Still planning on finishing these prompts, though it'll go into June for when I finish. Migraines take a lot out of me, I've found. Characters: Rosalin- Odette Leslie- Rapunzel Crystal (brief appearance)- Belle/Beauty Teddie (mentioned)- Odiele Sir (mentioned)- Rothbart

Rosalin’s POV

“She might not answer. Her door has been locked since this morning.” Crystal told her after giving Rosalin instructions to Leslie’s room. “If there’s still food on a tray outside her room and she lets you in, make sure she eats at least some of it, if you can? But if you can’t, that’s okay too. I’ll be up to check on her later.”

Rosalin just nodded in response. It was already odd to be going somewhere without Teddie. But she knew she’d be okay once she saw Leslie.

This facility was very similar to the one Teddie had brought her to. Homely. Comfortable. Safe. Once she got to the right hallway, it wasn’t hard to figure out which was the door to Leslie’s room. There was a covered tray on the floor in front of it. As she got closer, Rosalin could catch the faint scent of distress through the door.

She knocked softly, calling out, “Leslie? It’s Rosalin. Can I come in?”

There was no answer. Not that she expected one. But it was a disappointment all the same.

“I’ll be out here if you change your mind.”

Still no answer.

So she settled on the floor, opening the book Teddie had lent her. It was nothing like what Sir restricted her to. She enjoyed how the intended couple were two girls instead of one boy and one girl, like so many other love stories were. Rosalin’s thoughts drifted to thinking of herself and Teddie together, as she’d been doing more often recently.

Blushing, she shook her head as if that would cast the thoughts away. Teddie had already firmly told her that despite them sharing a soul-mark, Rosalin should be part of a pack that didn’t just consist of herself, Teddie, and Sir. After she did that then maybe, maybe, Teddie said, then they could explore their bond further.

It did make sense, as her social knowledge was limited to the few parties she’d been permitted to go to with Sir. And the other people like Sir didn’t want their birds talking to each other. They were all meant to be pretty things, meant for show, not for chirping. Even if Sir let her sing for them on occasion. That is, until he made her to perform for them in private.

Regardless, if she did want to make a pack with the few faces she did know, they were still trapped in their gilded cages. All of them, except for her. And Leslie.

Lost in thought, she didn’t notice the door had opened until she felt a presence next to her. Turning her head while getting up to stand, Rosalin’s eyes met Leslie’s.

Her friend was a mess. Empty, unseeing eyes were bloodshot and swollen, tears still falling. No dress in sight, just a sweater and sweatpants, hanging off Leslie’s too small frame. She kept sniffing her nose and rubbing it with her sleeve. Her hair was everywhere, tangled and much shorter than it had been last time they’d met here, choppy and uneven. The scent coming from her was hard to discern. Frantic, distressed, exhausted, grieving. Several emotions overpowering each other. She swayed on her feet, looking lost. Like the whole world had been ripped out from under her.

“Mama lied.” Leslie croaked, voice wavering through her tears. “She lied.”

Rosalin caught her in her arms as Leslie fell forward, dam breaking for what she suspected was one of several times since this morning. Glancing into the room over her shoulder, her heart clenched. Everything was in disarray. Torn clothing all over the floor. Clumps of hair by and on the vanity. The only somewhat orderly thing in the room was Leslie’s nest on her bed, but even that was haphazard.

Once Leslie had calmed down again, Rosalin pulled back. She brushed Leslie’s hair behind her ears, resting her forehead against the other girl’s and closing her eyes.

“We’ll get through this together, okay?”

Leslie just let out a shaky sigh in response.

Rosalin drew away again, this time to pick up the covered tray. “You sit and relax. Crystal told me you needed to eat something. I’ll clean up while you do.”

Sniffling, Leslie rubbed at her eyes, before taking the tray. “You don’t have to do that. It’s my responsibility and-”

“Leslie.” She reached out to squeeze her friend’s arm softly. “Today’s been a lot. No one’s blaming you for breaking down. You don’t need to be strong anymore.”

There was a strange look in her eyes as Leslie ran her fingers along the edge of the tray. Licking her lips, she said, “Neither do you.”

“Yeah.” Rosalin smiled sadly. “I know. But I’m not alone anymore and neither are you. I have Teddie while you have Amalia and Josh. And even though we have them, we’re still a pack and you need me as much as I need you.” She held up her hand, pinky out. “In this together, remember?”

That at least got her a small smile in response. Even a halfhearted one was better than none.

“Yeah.” Leslie linked her pinky with Rosalin’s. “Together.”

Rosalin squeezed her arm again, now guiding Leslie back into the room. “Now come on. I doubt you ate much at breakfast even before all this.”

She chuckled in response to Leslie’s grumbles about “knowing her too well” as her friend settled into the chair in the corner. Rosalin started cleaning up the room, opening the drapes and windows to let sun and air in. They just chatted aimlessly, Rosalin doing most of the talking.

It was nice, being able to speak freely. No worries about masters coming in to stop them. No fears of being scolded or punished for making a sound. Something in Rosalin still tensed whenever she heard someone walk past the room, but Teddie said that would probably never fully go away. Just lessen over time.

At least Leslie was doing a lot better than she was expecting, even with her still on the edge of another breakdown. She was bouncing back, actually eating while she listened and watched Rosalin, chiming in every now and then. Either her time at the Institution or the Center had broken her undying loyalty to that awful woman. There was still progress to be made, yes, but it was nice to see her friend relaxed.

Her own progress was questionable, even with her doctor’s and Teddie’s repeated reassurances that she was doing better. There were still nightmares, still the feeling like Sir would come back any day and take her back. The legal team was having trouble pinning him with anything, even with her medical records and Teddie’s testimony. Rosalin didn’t have to read Teddie’s thoughts to know she was worried the charges wouldn’t hold.

It wasn’t until she felt Leslie’s hand on her arm while picking up the torn clothing that she’d realized she’d stopped talking.

Her friend didn’t say anything, just hugged her.

It was Rosalin’s turn to go limp, though she didn’t cry. Looping her arms around Leslie’s waist, she sighed, taking in their mixing scents.

They’d get through this. Together. They had to.

[sardonic-sprite]

I'm Back!

Wow, so Lent is over now, so my tumblr fast is also over and I'm still a little in shock, lol. I had hoped the past six weeks? I don't know, Time is weird, would be more productive but at least I got SOME stuff written/posted. Anyway, I have one more month of school and then fucking FINALS so expect sporadic updates at idiot-o-clock hours of the night, and maybe yell at me to sleep, eat, study, or drink water whenever i do post 😅

I am up to SO EFFING MANY wips rn on so many different fronts you guys have no freaking idea 😭 so here's a status report for EVERYTHING on or going on sardonic_sprite. (Its gonna be a monster post, y'all, bear with me)

in absolutely no particular order:

Wayne4Ham: We have a LONG way to go with this one, so just be patient and I'll slowly but steadily plug on through. Aaron Burr, Sir, should theoretically take me no longer than end of april

Wayne-Crazy: there's like 4 specific requests on it, plus a few 'series' i started, but after those, say 6-7, i'll probably mark as complete and only re-open if someone offers me an idea

Batman Beginners: i'll tell y'all up front, this one will take me forever. i don't even know what all I intend to cover, but know that i'm halfway done with the DITF arc, and it'll probably come out in the next two months

Just A Kid: this was my shits-and-giggles fic that got like 3000 notes in a weekend lmao. it's something i do intend to continue bc its so fun and i enjoy the concepts in it, but i don't have plans to actively write more of it in the immediate future.

Rev Wayne: just gave y'all Jason's fic, so the next probably won't come until late in summer, extrapolating from my few data points. if anyone has ideas for timmy's intro, let me know, i'd love some inspiration

Celeb Batwaynes: reported separate from wayne-crazy for reasons. i think theres like 12 specific requests plus 2 ideas of my own. i may put out a poll for the next one to write, but not until after school's out, because these fics are HUGE time-eaters for me. speaking of, are non-tumblr-users able to vote on polls?

Welcome to Gotham U: this was again, me doing shit bc why not. will probably add more in the style that i first posted, but i doubt i will write any prose for it. if you would like to give it a try, please reach out, i'd love to see what you write!

One Diamond: every time i touch this i make the cliffhanger worse lmao. i finally do have a direction, but execution is gonna have to wait a while.

The Young, Innocent, and Righteous: this is mostly just for me anyway, but i'm just gonna say that i'm waiting until i finish watching miraculous season 5 before i go any further

AS you wish: i have 5 more requests to do and i am so sorry to everyone waiting you do not deserve this lmao. i promise im trying, i love your ideas, it just takes me a really long time to fill in the rest and then actually write it. the next one on my list is particularly hard to pin down and so it's halting the ones behind it to. if not before, then after finals i will sit and bang my head on the keyboard until something good comes out

Light Isn't Fadin': soooooo many people have asked me about this one oof. SOMEDAY, i swear. right now its a huge, nebulous, hulking monster and im sorry it's just not happening yet.

A christmas carol: wait until december. please

Father's Day: june.

A Little Problem: over the summer, i will watch marvel movies until they once again hijack my brain and fuel this to completion. maybe.

easter eggs: how the fuck did i forget this lmao. i'm doing as much as i can in april, but when the month is done, i'm sorry, we'll all be waiting until next lenten season. hopefully it won't come to that.

aaaaand i THINK that's finally it. there's also a bunch of random paragraphs in word and google docs that may appear, not to mention ideas that kidnap me in dark alleys. but i also have like a good half dozen other wips for other places that im trying to attend to, so please be forgiving if it seems like its taking a while to post something as sprite.

as always, i love questions, comments, concerns, even some complaints, so feel free to interact.

See ya when I see ya!

sprite

[primevein]

The Prime of His Youth: Book IV: Fire's Master: Ch32: Sunrise

A small warp gate opened up and a group of six train engines attached together flew through so quickly that it closed almost as soon as it opened. Rahab Ziskind opened the comm. channel to them, "Unknown vessel, this is the Prime Ship Ion. Identify yourself."

"This is Shouki of the of the Sunrise Thunder. What are you?"

"Patch me through." Sarah Saunders stated. A still Cybertronian face appeared on the monitor, "This is Sarah Saunders, we'll transmit data for an L4 Trojan Orbit with the Planet Master. Proceed there until we can review our archives or speak with the Prime."

"And exactly why should we do that?" Shouki firmly asked.

"Because - Prime Ship." Sarah Saunders stated, "Or because the Phthia's broadside would likely leave dead husks in the void."

"Oh, I like the way she said that." Shouki stated.

"Of course you would." Yukikaze stated. His fixed picture took up the left side of the screen while Shouki's face moved to fill the right.

"Let's just comply." Suiken stated. The screen was now filled with three fixed faces. "I doubt they could hit us, but we don't need to pick a fight."

A fourth face appeared, "Yet." Kaen added.

"Alright." Shouki's stated, "We'll be adrift - in the void."

"You could explore the other planets." Sarah Saunders said to them.

"We're not eggheads." Seizan's fixed face said as it appeared.

"Speak for yourself" Suiken stated.

"I'm still curious what they are." Getsuei fixed face stated, as it appeard on the screen.

"Do you mind if we combine?" Shouki asked.

"As long as you keep your distance." Sarah Saunders stated.

The six fixed faces were replaced with a single moving face, "This is Raiden. Moving to L4. Now, could you answer our question?" He asked, until something occured to him, and he sighed, "It's obvious you are Human. We never expected to see you so far from home."

"We could say the same from you." Merrick Parry said to them. "You mind if we come for a visit."

"Really?" Sarah Saunders asked.

"If I die, then we know we can't trust them." Merrick Parry said, trying to hide his glee.

Sarah Saunders sighed. "Let me contact..."

"Me?" June asked, as she walked onto the bridge. "We could ask ourself if it's a good idea or not, but chances are my son would let them try."

Sarah Saunders sighed once again, "Yeah..." Merrick Parry nearly jumped with excitement. "You haven't even asked her, yet."

"We could use the company." Raiden simply stated.

Sarah Saunders sighed once again.

* * *

Stormwright leapt out of the Ion's airlock with Merrick Parry in her hand. She transformed him into her cockpit, and the tailsitter fired it's thrusters to fly away from the ship.

* * *

Stormwright flew up to the connected trains. "Yo." Merrick Parry stated, "I'm Merrick, and this is Stormwright."

"Hello." Stormwright simply stated.

"You're all Japanese trains?!" Merrick exclaimed.

"Because everyone wants four wheels?" Raiden asked.

"He is excited." Stormwright brightly said.

"That's... an understatement." Merrick Parry voiced. "A little curious how it happened."

"We were already trainbots." Raiden stated, "Japan has an absolutely amazing rail system."

"Can't argue with that." Merric Parry stated.

"I don't know enough to comment." Stormwright stated, "Though, next time we're on Terra, I want to look into this."

"Oh, absolutely!" Merrick Parry stated.

"So, you want to tell us what's going on here?" Raiden asked them, as the combiner flew alongside the tailsitter.

"Honestly?" Merrick Parry asked, "Not really."

"Oh, now you don't want to talk?" Stormwright asked.

"I want to talk about everything other than what's going on here." Merrick Parry asked.

"Then I guess I'll give you the short version." Stormwright stated, "You'll have to wait until Japheth, or his archivists are ready for the longer one. Long story short, lost colony. They travelled between Cybertron, Caminus, and Terra to figure it out. The planet is called Master, and was one of the Titan colonies."

"And, exactly how long ago was that?" Raiden asked.

"The Age of Wrath." Stormwright stated. "Caminus was another of these colonies"

"And now a regular stop." Raiden stated.

"We were also a lot more lucky than the Micromasters were." Stormwright continued, "Japheth described our world as a paradise - a divine garden in Human mythology. Though, Caminus has worked hard to maintain the natural beauty."

"So does Japan." Raiden stated.

"Even better reason to visit." Stormwright said happily. "As for Japheth, right now, he's deep below Master, doing as only he could possibly understand."

"Arcee probably knows." Merrick Parry stated.

"I asked her, and she doesn't." Stormwright stated.

* * *

Bulkhead drove out of the hangar and into the rift valley, and he opened his comms. Smokescreen picked up on the other end, "So, what did I miss?"

"We just confirmed the identity of the Sunrise Thunder." Smokescreen simply stated.

"Whoa." Bulkhead uttered, as he looked distant, "That takes me back. That was one hell of a battle. What are they doing here?"

"It seems..." Smokescreen stated, and sighed, "No one wanted to tell them what happened."

"What about you?" Bulkhead asked him.

"I - am apparently - too boring." Smokescreen voiced. "They want to head down to see Japheth."

"Did you tell them about the acid rain?" Bulkhead asked.

"I tried." Smokescreen simply stated.

"Alright." Bulkhead stated, "I can probably get a signal to Japheth. Bulkhead out."

"Bulkhead?" Japheth asked, as he transformed, and paused in front of the doors.

"We've got some war heroes who want to meet you." Bulkhead stated.

"What do you mean?" Japheth asked, "How did they get here?"

"No one wants to talk, apparently." Bulkhead stated, "They want to come down and see you?"

"And?" Japheth asked, "Do we know they aren't hostile?"

"I don't know?" Bulkhead sardonically stated, "The rain?" He then heard Japheth sigh over the comms. "Give me a chance to talk with Ruck about the supplies, then I'll come back to the Skyfall."

* * *

Japheth drove out of the hangar and up to the Skyfall. He transformed and walked up to the ramp that Bulkhead was standing beside. Gella stepped down from the ramp, "Everyone has decided where they want to be."

"And, the Humans?" Japheth asked.

"Most of them are in the city." Gella stated, and a palpable pause followed.

"We only brought one chemical toilet." Japheth said under his breath. He then looked up at her, "And we can't build any plumbing, until we do something about the water."

Gella glared at him for a moment, "You have a plan, don't you?"

"The plan to make a plan?" Japheth asked.

"That's good enough for most battles." Bulkhead stated.

* * *

The Skyfall flew out of the rift valley, and angled upwards towards the Phthia. It launched high into the sky and then space before matching the Phthia's orbit.

* * *

Japheth and Bulkhead stood on the roof of the Skyfall as the connected train approached. It slowed and matched their speed before breaking apart. Japheth looked through all of them. Stormwright looping around the Phthia.

"I'm Shouki, the leader." he stated.

"Japheth Prime." Japheth warmly said to him. "So, why don't you tell me your story first, and then I'll tell you some of mine."

"Some?" Seizan asked.

Japheth just looked at Shouki, "We were on Terra, admiring Japan's train system. We heard the comm. between Seaspray and the Phthia about a Prime going to a lost colony."

"And, what?" Bulkhead asked, "You're just that slow?"

"Seriously!?" Kaen asked.

"It's not like they know fast we are." Suiken said to Kaen.

"We were working." Shouki replied to Bulkhead.

"K." Bulkhead affirmed.

"That's it?" Kaen asked.

"Do I look like I'm afraid of hard work?" Bulkhead asked.

"He looks like he could climb a mountain." Seizan eagerly said.

Japheth looked back to Master. "This world is beset by acid rain." He looked back to the Sunrise Thunder, "We are setting up a base deep inside."

"And we just wait?" Yukikaze asked.

"He wants us to help him." Kaen eagerly stated.

"It's hard for us to work on a world without train tracks." Shouki simply stated.

"One of you could carry more than me and Japheth could in a single trip." Bulkhead suggested.

Shouki thought for a moment. He turned to look at the others.

"Seriously?" Kaen asked, "Of course we're helping."

"Then we'll have plenty of time to chat." Japheth said with a bright smile.

* * *

Japheth and Bulkhead walked up front, with Getsuei in vehicle mode on their shoulders. Behind them was Kaen and Seizan with their shoulders under the Getsuei's rear.

"I'll give it to them." Suiken stated, "They certainly aren't afraid of hard work."

"Not exactly how I expected... to help..." Shouki said, trying to hide his disappointment.

"Alright?," Getsuei asked, "you were a Human, in a skin-tight suit, under Cybertron?"

"New Kalis has a bit of a reputation." Bulkhead stated, and paused a moment, "Miko loved it." He then sighed, "Right, you haven't met her."

"She scrapped the..." Japheth said, and paused, "Oh, we have to roll it back a bit. Megatron got a group of Elder Insecticons to work together. The best fighter of the group..." Japheth said, and then gave Bulkhead a nervous look.

"He took me town, hard." Bulkhead stated, "Though, he did have ToxEn."

"What - the - slag?" Seizan asked, "ToxEn?"

"Miko wanted revenged." Bulkhead stated.

"And she got it." Japheth said, and the two paused.

"Good for a Femme." Yukikaze said, as he walked beside the group.

"Except..." Japheth said.

"If you were paying attention, you'd know she's a Human." Suiken stated.

"Was." Japheth said, "But we haven't gotten to that part, yet."

"Alright, why were you doing this again?" Yukikaze asked.

"Because they asked him." Bulkhead uttered.

"Who?" Yukikaze asked.

"Yeah, I kind of forgot, myself." Shouki stated.

"The Forgefire Parliament on Caminus." Japheth stated, and paused moment, "Before they knew I was chosen as a Prime."

"What - the living - scrap?" Shouki asked.

Japheth looked at Bulkhead, "Didn't I cover that?"

"It looks like you forgot." Bulkhead uttered.

"That's a long story on it's own." Japheth stated.

[sovamurka]

My personal opinion on why "Kanej Church Scene" is so great.

1. The Church.

We know how significant faith is to Inej and how the same faith is meaningless for Kaz. Interestingly, in this scene both of them discover something beyond their previous perspectives.

By killing a man in a church, Inej does not just commit a sin, she commits blasphemy. Contrastingly, Kaz receives something he did not have before. Faith. Not in the Saints that are worshipped by his beloved but in Inej herself.

Before that, Kaz did not look up even once, probably thinking that 'heavens' are empty, deserting him once again. He is exhausted when he tries to exit the chapel and is not sure that luck is on his side when his opponent strikes again. But then, out of the blue, 'heavens' send him salvation. Kaz, shocked, lifts his gaze and looks right into HER eyes, eyes that watched over him, eyes that saved him. He literally cannot stop gazing at her, he looks at her with such reverence and fondness. It's as if he found his personal Sankta (which proves to be true as we learn later when he admits it to her) and with her his own faith.

For Inej though... By protecting the person she cares about, she did not just go against the law, she 'fell' in the eyes of her Saints. For Inej this 'lapse from virtue' is even worse than when she had to give her body. It is the reason why she jumps from the balcony and looks down, at the corpse. She can't lift her eyes from the ground, she clearly thinks like she failed, like she sank lower that low.

That's why when Kaz asks her to look into his eyes (twice!), he basically gives her a chance to rise up, like when she gave a chance to ascend to him by throwing that knife.

She can't believe that somebody would ever give this chance to her but still looks up and sees a face of the one, whose life she placed higher than her faith.

And in that moment everything is settled. It's like... Time stops in its eternal promenade. Even if this eye contact between two broken people does not help us find anything new, it still makes sure we understand that we just saw something incredible.

2. An allusion to marriage.

Technically it is NOT a wedding scene. It's a gruesome murder one. But in matters of cinematography? It ticks all the boxes. How? Let me explain.

Like a grimm wedding of two lost souls, this murder ceremony serves as a way of solidifying their union. With blood.

There is a church (chapel) for the 'wedding'.

There is a fire 'priest'.

There are two 'newlyweds' that are trying to survive it (ironically, this part applies to real life).

And then there are 'guests' that come towards the end of the ceremony.

'The priest' basically pronounces them husband and wife by performing a bloody sacrifice and it's... A terrifying yet excellent concept. 10/10, absolutely would recommend.

Do you want to know when 'the bride' says 'Yes!'? It is the moment she kills 'the priest' to save 'the groom', who, in turn, looks at 'the bride' (with what we would call 'all the reverence of this forsaken world').

Even the music of this exact moment is akin to a wedding march. Heartwretching wedding march.

3. Intimacy and a lack of 'the third person'

There is one thing that was entirely intentional by the creators: they wanted to make it feel like this scene is only between the two. They never show us how it looks from the outside. The viewer sees this scene only through the eyes of two important characters. It's most noticeable when they lock each other's eyes. First we see Kaz's face, then Inej's, then Kaz's again. It's as if we are forbidden from seeing them from the outside.

There is no shot where they look at each other and the watcher is standing somewhere near. It gives us a feeling of intimacy, like it's a sensual, personal scene between them.

Even when Kaz asks Inej to look into his eyes, she doesn't face us, we only see a face of the young man but not the young lady he's talking to. And then we see the young lady who looks at her young man, whose face we see no more.

That's when we, as the audience, understand that it's something that can only exist between them and them alone.

Only when Inej starts hearing voices of the guards, Kaz turns around and viewers see both of their faces: they're caught red-handed. Well, at least by the 'guards' on the other side of the screen.

[desertdollranch]

have you seen the leaks about the new 90s historial? i almost punched my screen out of anger

I have! And I am very intrigued. I'm also really surprised that the products appear to be in the later stages of development and that they might be released much sooner than we expected a 90's character to be.

That's all I'm going to say about them for now. The reason I haven't posted about them or reblogged any posts about them is because about 11 months ago Mattel made two copyright strikes against my blog for daring to speak the name Corinne Tan. Which was ridiculous because that was already public information on Trademarkia, but I think an employee accidentally leaked a huge chunk of information somehow, and so to cover for that mistake, they started striking against any social media that was using the trademarked names. Unfortunately one more strike against me means my blog gets terminated. So to keep my blog alive, I do have to avoid using trademarked names or discussing any identifying info until the dolls are released. The copyright strikes remain in place for 18 months, so it'll be June 2023 before they're lifted.

In the meantime, I did two things. First was to vow not to buy anything directly from American Girl until June of 2023. Or maybe never again. They can't just give my blog a near-death experience and still expect me to be a loyal paying customer. My second action was to get myself an Our Generation doll and name her Carina Tan. Mattel can't stop me from doing that, it's totally legal, and so I did it to remind them that we here on Tumblr really are that petty. I figured if they're actually going to copyright strike me for saying the name Corinne Tan, then I'm gonna say Carina Tan a lot and just enjoy the thrill of not getting in trouble.

Unlike Corinne Tan, Carina Tan has a pet tortoise, hermit crabs, geckos, and frogs. She's actually Filipina-American. I read that Tan is actually the most common Chinese surname in the Philippines.

I also have an Our Generation doll who shares a first name with the upcoming 2023 Girl of the Year. Because I can. And I'm considering making my own 90's character with a similar name to theirs, just to rub it in Mattel's face that I can do what I want and name my dolls what I want.

So yeah. I read every single post that everyone here makes about the potential 90's character. I don't dare reblog them, but I enjoy reading each and every one.

[somin-yin]

Ramala's first hate kiss (complete scene) ❤️

Here are some thoughts about this scene:

Okay first off, I LOVE how Ratan can sense Amala's feelings (in this case it's her anger but in other cases he could sense her other feelings too). If this doesn't scream soulmates then I don't know what it means. Second I LOVE how surprised Ratan is that Amala could be angry about what happened to Rose because for him it's not something worth angering about 😂 Thirdly I wonder what's prohibiting Ratan from telling Amala :0

OKAY BUT I LOVE ME A MAN WHO DOESN'T LET ME WALK AWAY ANGRY AND IS WILLING TO TALK THINGS THROUGH!!! This is exactly what I need because walking away from conflict with things left unsaid is never good and Ratan knows it ❤️

I wonder what does this mean and how is he so sure she has nothing to worry about? Perhaps he made sure of it?

"I'm here so you'll always be safe" OMGGG SIR DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA OF HOW SEXY DOES THAT SOUND? BECAUSE IT'S MAKING ME FEEL ❤️ THINGS ❤️

"Ratan seemed completely disconnected from reality" Why is he so relatable sometimes? ;-; And sure Jan, I don't know if I should believe him or not, one part of me wants to believe he wouldn't lie to our face like that, while another part of me is aware that many things seems to be pointing towards him so far.

OMG WHAT DOES HE MEAN BY "Darkness is always scary but I'm not dangerous TO YOU" Is he the embodiment of darkness or something? :0 the other day @laptopcius, other friends and me were trying to look into Hindu gods and creatures to see if we can find anyone who could be Ratan but we didn't find anything convincing yet ;-; but here he's talking as if he was darkness itself :0

Also shout out to him expressing tenderness rather than power displays!! He's so sure of his masculinity that he doesn't need to be showing unnecessary power displays to his partner ❤️

The longing ❤️ and him talking about torture, does it mean he could be punished or tortured for kissing Amala? :0

HHHHH THIS IS DELICIOUS ❤️❤️❤️

Oh, Amala please shut up, you don't talk for me, I want to keep going ;-;

And Ratan actually left, does that mean he's not in their side? ;-; is rivals/enemies to lovers what I see here? Also "Your lips say one thing, yet your soul desires another" HHHHHHHHH I'M TELLING YOU, THEY'RE SOULMATES, RATAN CAN SEE INSIDE HER SOUL!!! Rivals/enemies to lovers who are also soulmates, 2 of my favourite tropes combined and I love that for me ❤️😂

Overall, Ramala's first kiss scene was everything I was expecting AND MORE, it exceeded my expectations, it was awesome, it had the exact ingredients to make it spicy, sexual, full of tension yet so full of longing and yearning too, my jam ❤️ this scene was knee trembling and breathtaking ❤️ How am I supposed to wait until June to see this man again? (if he appears ;-;) the good thing is we'll have 4 episodes so the possibilities increase :0

And last but not least, I think I know who Lachance from Theodora is, it's Ratan since he smells like bergamot 😂 okay I really should stop linking KCD and Theodora but I can't help it 😂

> Ramala's 2nd kiss here

[jadepetals]

i'm not even gonna apologize about the amount of tiny penis fics here, however i still swear it's not a thing i'm into.

Take Me Home by @sun-tomato / 2433 words

After four years of living together at Uni, the boys have all graduated and it's time to move on.

Moving house sucks. Of course, it doesn’t help that, while the four of them had been trying to divide and pack everything before the deadline this weekend, Louis had spent his time unpacking it again.

Roll the Dice by @allwaswell16 / 3870 words

Louis has been in love with Harry since they were eighteen. It isn't until Harry's thirtieth birthday in Las Vegas that Louis must finally decide to either tell Harry how he feels or let him marry someone else.

all in my mind / 4305 words

louis and harry find out they're expecting, and tell the boys. kind of.

Birthday Princess by kingsofeverything / 4502 words

Harry celebrates his birthday with Blow Jobs (and Slippery Nipples and Sex on the Beach) and drunkenly propositions the bartender in the bathroom.

Bijou by @kingsofeverything / 6051 words 

Being in love with his best friend wouldn't be so awful if Harry didn't have to listen to him constantly complain about how the guys he dates don't measure up.

Opposites Attract by kingsofeverything / 7169 words

Harry has a list of reasons he and Louis shouldn’t date. Maybe they’re more compatible than he thinks.

Be Mine, Little Valentine by kingsofeverything / 7345 words

Louis wants to find someone who'll love all of him. There's just one tiny complication.

Snow Big Deal by kingsofeverything / 8392 words

Louis is a professional snowboarder set to appear in ESPN The Body Issue and Harry is an assistant photographer working for the magazine. They have more in common than they think.

A Small Matter (A Matter of Trust) by kingsofeverything / 18710 words

Harry has a thing for jockstraps and Louis likes to wear them.

What Side Of Love Are You On? by @fallinglikethis / 25000 words

A Because I Said So Au with a bisexual twist.

Take a Hit / 41456 words

Hey, alright, so I like to get concussions from the ground, you like them from sweaty men in tight pants.”

“Do you think you have a concussion?” Harry asks, completely ignoring the part where Louis insulted him. That was not meant to be over looked, thank you very much.

“No.” Louis answers, definitely not pouting because Harry didn't so much as crack an offended smile at his joke. Louis lives for offending people.

A Certain Satisfaction by @eeveelou and @creamcoffeelou / 51659 words

The porn au where Louis is a university student who needs money and runs across an ad that sounds too good to be true.

Flightless Bird by audreyhheart / 150022 words

Louis Tomlinson is a principal dancer with The Royal Ballet. When his rival from ballet school, moody dance prodigy Harry Styles joins the company, old wounds are reopened and old passions reignited. During the company's production of Swan Lake the secret that doomed their love is finally revealed, but will it be too late?

second-hand emotion by @wadey-wilson / 183794 words 

Louis is a twenty-three years old, soon-to-be Columbia University graduate with a loving boyfriend, wonderful friends, two kinds of reputations, and a suit so tight it’s nigh inappropriate. Harry is a twenty-three AWOL.

When you lose all that matters, love becomes an impossible achievement. Ergo, it’s only logical to fall for someone who can never die.

may   june   july   august