#so be proud of me yall
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how much caffeine do I have in my system today?????
#hi#me#my face#selfie#mirror selfie#yall don't get to see the work shirt bc I don't want anyone knowing where I work soz loves#always in a state of undress huh#anyway#girls with tattoos#girls with glasses#girls who lift#I'm slowly getting a bit leaner which ISNT VERY INTENTIONAL#but it is happening#cute girl#penguin socks#wombats#the socks are actually chickens today but rituals are intricate#god I could go for some tater tots#brunch buddy where are you#(here in spirit) I know#already at 60g protein today too#so be proud of me yall#be my friend#message me#okay I'm gonna go back to work now#I love yall#love me#happy weekend#hot girl shit#later taters
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4 month old sa2 redraw of gay
dont forget ur daily clicks!!
#hhi everybody ^^ i dunno if im back but i founf this old ass drawing and i wanted to post it cause im proud of it👍#i domt really have any new drawings to post bc ive been so fucking done. just. uuughgsghhhhhh :)#this is from back in APRIL. im so done that i cant even draw helñp#i wish i could tag this as yuri or smth. ik its not for yall but theyre sapphic to me#t4t sonadow yuri guys. gguys please. transmasc agender butch shadow x transmasc genederfluid pan sonic guys. guys please see the vission#sth#sonic fanart#sonic#sonic the hedgehog#shadow the hedgehog#sonadow#nov.aart
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Chillin and getting a drink after a day of manipulating the masses 🫶
#myart#Transformers One#TF One#Sentinel Prime#Airachnid#Zuka said that and it was so funny#Ermm I just wanna say that I don't know anything abour drawing transformers or robots 😶#So plz excuse me if it's a lil ugly here and there#I just hadd to draw the baddies 🙈#It's not a surprise that I'd be falling for them lol#Kept it a lil messy than how I usually draw so I don't focus on trying to make it look good :p#Anyways hope yall like this one!#I'm pretty proud of it! :D#tfo sentinel prime#tfo airachnid
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LOVE YOUR SCRAP BABY DESIGN
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/328bfda5dd3b22222fb7e142a7867621/f020d09cdaaa273a-aa/s540x810/e966d474fcf7863b313065bf9aa893682f87e510.jpg)
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IM SO GLAD YALL LIKED HER!!
#ask reply#I was so proud with how she came out#so it’s nice to see so many of yall agreed she was rad!!#tbh scrap baby’s design grew on me over time#I wasn’t sold immediately but the more I saw her the more I just loved the look#just the way she gave herself skates to the makeshift crown#the spiked hair and huge claw#gives off such ‘it’s not a phase mom!’ /pos vibes#super cute super cool love her
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(click for better quality! 🖥️)
pt.1
i love bratty computers breathe if u agree <3
this is a little long, so continue reading below! :3
#OK SO#i mentioned this was based off a real event in a prev post#lemme explain:#so the other night i had a ramune for the first time and this exact scenario happened where it fucking burst everywhere#at first i thought it was just a little but then i kept finding sticking spots on my desk#so i just cleaned the entire thing#NV (my laptop) was in my school bag when this happened so she didnt get effect teehee#the white of the speech bubbles look pink on this bg and its pissing me off#also i feel like i should start sketching these out because ough#i need a better plan for making these i just be rawdogging them#yet again another big ass canvas 1112 x 5788 exactly ouuughh#i also rlly like when computers use emoticons/emojis to express emotions AAAHH!!#anyways i hope yall enjoy this im rlly proud of it teehe!!!#kiid.art#digital art#medibang paint#clip studio paint#no ocs#original art#artists on tumblr#technophilia#techum#objectphilia#objectum#robot fucker#mini comic#computer#was typing the tags and for some reason limbus company came up...???
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someone should come put me down like an animal
#im rlly proud of how the hands came out which is the only reason why im posting this#if the hands didnt come out as good as it did yall wouldnt be looking at this post rn so BE GRATEFUL !!!#murder drones#fanart#md uzi#md uzi doorman#uzi doorman#nuzi#md nuzi#md n#serial designation n#my art#i rlly need to draw other md characters more often i just keep drawing oogi#this emo biatch has me wrapped around her finger
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Progenitor AU suddenly getting more fanart thanks to Terrarium Kaveh. Truly, no one does it like him.
#Progenitor giving me so much content n fuel yall#genuinely invested in this au omg#kinda sad KIERU isnt here this hoyofair tho...#where did they go :((#I think theyre busy doing other life things right now which. im proud of them just. I just rlly like their work man#ANYWAYS GO WATCH THIS SHOW!!! How often does an au get fully animated like this with several eps#for albedo raiden mona kokomi n scara fans#yae miko n kaveh are the new additions yippeee#Subject 2 my beloved as well#evelynpr genshin#genshin#genshin impact#kaveh
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i have so much respect for this kid
#he's like 5 years younger than me but he's still a kid to me like that's my son fr#and im so proud#like he did all this that's crazy#btw yall should go n watch the documentary#pjo tv show#percy jackson#walker scobell#percy jackon and the olympians#pjo series#pjo#pjo tv series#pjo documentary
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V1 got rizzed up.
(I’ve never genuinely loved something I drew so much. I also made up some typical yaoi dialogue for this picture in my head so that was fun.)
This is the aftermath btw:
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#ultrakill#ultrakill lives rent free in my head.#v1 ultrakill#gabriel ultrakill#fanart#gabv1el#ultrakill fanart#v1 fanart#gabriel ultrakill fanart#I genuinely love this drawing#I’m like so proud#v1 is not as small in this drawing#in the words of Hakita#they’re however tall they need to be at any given moment#i love them#i love them so much#if youre curious about the dialogue just message me lmao#can yall tell I gave up at the legs LMAO
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Arcane Leo for when? 👀 ( I KNOW you've been obsessed with it for a few weeks now and I KNOW you thought about it don't lie to us. Love your art btw 💕)
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Arcane Leona 🦁
#twst#twisted wonderland#leona kingscholar#my art#some people got it right#yall know me#im so proud of how this study came out
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man i sure do hope tumblr doesn't EAT the QUALITY
anyway- STAAAAIIINN
@may-we-rest-well you know i have to tag you on this xd
inspiration was from my lovely friend's w.i.p. stain cosplay (the one i tagged)
[his cosplay of stain here]
sketch from my phoneEEEUGGHHE under da cut
drawing on phone is torture
#rubyart#mha#mha art#bnha#bnha art#chizome akaguro#hero killer stain#stain mha#blood man#im pretty proud of this one#the detail on the arm wraps are just...MMUAH!#hope yall like it#i really like red eyes#the color makes me happy lol#also GOD i am so proud of that HAND! im glad i changed it up too#i really put a lotta effort into it#can you tell i like hands#can you tell i enjoy drawing them#truly the funnest thing to draw on a person#ALSO I FORGOT TO RECORD THIS TIMELAPSE IM SO MAD ABOUT THATHEDSFGHGDF#also also man yall really liked that last post#i should animate toshi doing more silly stuff#....eventually
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my jean & neil qpr agenda (part 1?)
after Neil orders the hit and Greyson becomes another Former Raven statistic for the media to go wild with, Jean ends up texting Neil. It's definitely not a thank you, but both of them know it kinda is (prob something like "you're an insufferable disease" lol)
They don't have contact for a while, but one day Neil reaches out by sending Jean the most atrocious multilingual French meme with "Kevin doesn't appreciate me or my humor, this is a hate crime"
It's sporadic from there, and maybe at one point they meet up while Neil and Andrew are on their summer road trip. Neil and Andrew end up in Colorado, and Jeremy, Cat, and Laila practically drag Jean there to see them (he'll deny that he had a good time, but he really did)
Andrew and Jean have a bizarre and interesting dynamic where they don't speak to each other often, but they eventually grow a mutual respect and shoot each other Looks about their "I'm Fine" partners. They don't mind just sitting in the same room and sharing space while they do their separate things.
When Jean and Jeremy start their pottery class, Jean takes to it like a fish to water.
He ends up majoring in Ceramics & Multimedia Art. Something about using his hands to create, rather than destroy.
He makes Neil a little exy racket charm for his keychain.
At one point, Jeremy makes a gc with Jean, Neil, Kevin, and Andrew on impulse. Jean "hates" it but doesn't leave the group chat. Andrew only stays in it because he can mute it, and it's useful for when they plan to meet up sometimes. It also makes Neil happy and it's not something he really minds
Jean also takes LOTS of pictures. With his phone, his friends' phones, a polaroid camera he gets as a gift from Cat, anything he can get his hands on. He hangs them up on his half of the room with Jeremy.
Eventually Jeremy and Jean do get separate rooms. They usually still sleep in the same room, but it's an important milestone for Jean and his recovery. Being able to have his own space, and know he's allowed to control who comes in it.
He decorates that room so much it's chaotic and beautiful and there's probably little pencil doodles on the wall next to his bed from when he can't sleep. He tends to draw daffodils :]
It becomes a bit of a tradition to meet Neil and Andrew every summer.
When they go pro, Jean and Neil end up on teams only a few hours' drive from each other. Neil and Andrew start on the same team, but the whole Minyard-Josten Rivalry is still a Thing because they're always shooting heated Russian at each other while "glaring" and no one else seems to realize it's their equivalent of flirting.
Jean thinks it's hilarious. He harasses Neil about it constantly.
Him and Kevin eventually mend their friendship, and they care about each other a lot.
Neil probably made the three of them matching "I survived Castle Evermore" shirts just to be a menace, and then Jean and Kevin have to make him swear that he'll never wear it in public.
Neil has a habit of just. Showing up at Jean's house and crashing sometimes.
Jeremy at one point jokes that he'll have to fight Neil for Jean's time in the future, but he's not really worried. They're happier when they spend time together. Jeremy and Andrew are chill with it.
When they meet up for the first time after a game between their pro teams, none of their teammates have any clue what's going on. Jean and Neil insult each other ferociously, but also can't seem to resist hip-checks and shoulder bumps and almost affectionate shoves.
Neil constantly sidles up to Jean and pretends like he doesn't know what he's doing. Jean usually responds by absently grabbing his hand so he knows where he is.
They are literally a cat and dog. Neil will deny that he's being caring or affectionate towards Jean all day long while actively attempting to be in Jean's space, and Jean practically perks up when Neil enters a room.
When their teams play against each other, they talk in French sometimes. Their checks are always a bit brutal (they know very well how far the other can be pushed before they break) but they help each other up at the end of quarters.
Jean is constantly antagonizing Neil by smiling and complimenting his striker skills while blocking him, and Neil is constantly taunting him with words that are plenty sharp, but never actually aimed for vital spots
Jean gets a service dog and Jeremy decides to name her Mr. Barkbark Flufferpants, following Andrew & Neil's naming scheme for their cats. They usually just call her "Mr."
When they make Court, the two of them practically live in each other's pockets.
Jeremy and Andrew watch both exasperatedly and amusedly (though Andrew just calls it annoyance when asked) as the two of them dance around their Big Queer Platonic Feelings
When they finally manage to actually communicate about it, it goes something like "Idk what's happening, I'm kinda obsessed with you but it is Not Romantic and I don't know what to do with that." And then "Oh thank hell, me too, I thought I was even weirder than I already am. Wanna go harrass the fbi together?" "No."
They become even more attached at the hip after that, can practically finish each other's sentences. It's like they freaking mind melded tbh.
At first Kevin gets worried that they're slipping into old habits from the Nest, especially Jean, but when he brings it up to Andrew and Jeremy, Andrew just goes "No, they're idiots." and Jeremy nods and says "I think they're in a honeymoon phase. If we see them slipping, we'll pull them out."
Kevin decides to wait and watch, and thankfully their relationship ends up being as healthy as Neil and Jean can be. There might be a little codependence going on, but they have other people and other grounding forces to help intervene if it seems to be unbalancing.
They both put each other on their emergency contacts list.
It's a common sight to find the two of them twisted into impossible positions together just doing their own things, Jean drawing, Neil watching reruns of Exy matches, whatever.
Their dynamic just becomes Jean, who genuinely grows up to be a pretty chill dude, and Neil, who's an absolute gremlin. Except they kinda absorb each other's personalities, so they're both little shits together. They fit.
There is definitely all sorts of weird conversations that they have at 2AM in little sleepovers they do together (sometimes with Kevin, Jeremy, or Andrew) because they never got that as kids.
I bet Neil mercilessly teases Jean for being allosexual, especially when he gets flustered (all in good fun, of course)
Jean just snarks back with a "shut up, I literally saw you look at Andrew like a besotted elderly man with his partner of fifty years like five minutes ago." Neil sticks out his tongue at him.
Jean actually can sometimes read the ways that Neil and Andrew show affection for each other because of how much time he spends around them, which leads to him occasionally getting confused when other people don't automatically Get It
Neil takes a while to warm up to Jeremy because he seems Too Nice, but once he does he helps Jeremy plan to absolutely torment Jean with silly little romantic gestures that make him flush all the way down to his neck
At one point Neil tries to get Jean to explain what it feels like to be sexually attracted to someone without knowing them really closely, and it leads to a really surprisingly deep conversation about attraction before it turns into neil making dick jokes.
Cat and Laila still keep in close contact with Jean, as well as Renee. They make sure to meet up as often as they can. Cat and Jean always go for a bike ride together and they all cook dinner as a group.
They're both cuddle monsters when in the right mood. They also have the convenient ability to fall asleep Anywhere when they feel safe. So finding them curled up together in weird places at home is pretty commonplace.
They're forever partners, not in the way that the world and the Nest tried to make them be, but in a way that they created themselves.
It doesn't have to be romantic to be special, and if anyone ever suggested that they should be in a romantic relationship, they would both look at that person with absolute judgement and disgust. This person interrupted their conversation. They were talking shit about someone. Neil is lounging in Jean's lap. Andrew is saying he hates them both, and Jeremy is cackling at it all while taking a low-res picture for Cat and Laila.
idk i have a Lot of thoughts and could keep going. (i might write a fic if anyone wants to read it, and I'll definitely write little snippets for myself if I get the time. )
#my qpr jean & neil agenda#all for the game#the sunshine court#aftg#neil josten#jean moreau#tsc#andrew minyard#thoughts#tsc spoilers#jeremy knox#KNAWING THE BARS OF MY ENCLOUSURE#listen they give me brainrot and I can't find the Exact dynamic i want on ao3 so i have to write about it#(also this is all written with absoutely no hate to the romantic jeaneil folks yall are doing amazing i'm so proud of you)#anyway also a cursory reminder that queerplatonic relationships are personal and vary from person to person!#They're very very cool and can look very different!#qpr concepts#qpr
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I ADORE your design for Charlie. It’s so adorable!!!!!!
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I’m so glad y’all loved her design!!
#ask reply#genuinely I was pretty proud of Charlie’s look#so the fact so many folks liked her made me so happy#I really wanted her to stand out even against other ghost kids#so she got this monochromatic look to her#like she’s been a ghost so long she’s lost her colours#along with that she resembles the puppet more#almost like they fused into one by this point#I really tried to make her both ghostly and eerie#but also cute and friendly#so I think I found that perfect balance#I’m glad one of yall took note of her oversized sleeves#I thought it was a cute design and kept that ghost vibe to her#I gotta draw her again soon!!#we all love Charlie Emily here 🖤🤍
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trying to cope </3
#mha#bnha#my hero academia#boku no hero academia#bakugo katuski#izuku midoriya#deku#mha season 7#bnha season 7#bakudeku#bkdk#dkbk#dekubaku#mha s7#bnha s7#mha spoilers#bnha spoilers#mha fanart#bnha fanart#bakudeku fanart#bkdk fanart#fanart#artists on tumblr#digital art#art#cryiling art#all these tags got me feeling like user aejiee again ajdhskfn#yall i freehanded deku's expression and bakugo's hand without a reference R U PROUD OF ME 😫#guys im. goig to htrow uppppp UGHHHHH THEY MAKW ME SO SADDD#i need deku crying over bakugo's corpse like asap. im going to scream oughhhhh
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Type: One-Shot (First part- Drabble) {If you want things to make sense you probably should read it, the first part, 😁😁😁}
Pairing: Fem! Student! and Soulmate! Reader x Damian Wayne/Robin
AU: Soulmate! Reader
Content: Swearing, angst, teenage stupidity, aged up kiddos 16/17, technical talk about soulmates, lowkey frustrations, some much angst yall, some fluff, mythology, toxic parents, and soul crushing
Word Count: 7,233
(P.S: Okay so this is going to be continuing from the I Feel a Sin Coming On drabble, I've been getting a few comments on it asking for a part two and someone sent in a request for a Shy and Smart Student! Reader with Damian and let's just say the gears in my head started turning. Anyways this could go on if you guys want it to, but it could also end like this! It will break you. I hope you all enjoy! :D)
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While, unfortunately, it's true the somewhat cruel existence of soul mates was around and kicking, love- true love was still there. Or at least it was believed to be there. It supposedly thrived even more for some reason. Some speculated that it was because there was a standing of everyone deserving love. Whether they were good or bad or in-between, they got someone who would love them for the rest of their life regardless of all the mistakes they made or continue to make. Others said it was because the universe deemed people good enough to have someone for the rest of their lives. Which seems a little close minded for a society in which everyone has a soulmate. But maybe that was because of the belief that if things didn’t work out with your soulmate- if you didn’t love them as you should or didn’t get the love you thought you deserved- it was because you weren’t good enough. Weren’t good enough to get the right kind of love. But in the end soulmates do exist. They exist and are for everyone. For each person you pass on the road, there is someone out there for them. Just as there's someone out there for you.
But the daunting notion that you have to be the right kind of good to get your perfect love chilled you to the bone. After all, if it wasn’t perfect what did that say about you? Because in the end weren’t they made for you? Maybe that’s why some still believed in true love, that it was real. Both because of and not because of soulmates. Rather because of the concept. Someone made just for you. Even if that person was flawed-if you are flawed, just as they were made for you, you were made for them. But sometimes, what is made for you can harm you a lot more than what’s not.
It was why you believed that the reason true love might still exist was actually because some people fell for their soulmate before they realized they were fated to be. Before that dreaded bond-that agonizing pull kicked, of their own free will they fell in love. Because they didn't have to suffer through the pull of a bond they never wanted, these people were blissfully ignorant of what forced love was like. They did not know the horrors of those forced to stay with someone their heart loved but mind did not. And despite all your animosity towards soulmates, despite your fear and hatred, what made this all the worse-all the more ironic-was that you were technically one of those people.
Before you even knew what a soulmate was to you-before you were old enough to recognize the pull, to feel, it’s dark and fervent demand for attention-you fell for him. For his laugh: in the way he tilted his chin back as if trying to suppress its joyous sound and his smile: in the way the corners of his would curve showing a slight dimple in his left cheek and revealing the softness his eyes could have. For his kindness: in the way he disregarded what others said and lived his life freely as himself despite the demand of society for him to be like the rest-to be normal. For his mortality: in the way he would never allow bullies to pick on others around him, even if he thought they needed to toughen up. But most importantly for the way he tried each and every single day to learn more and be better even if you’re the only one who noticed. For the way he seemed to be all what you dreamed, something that should have caused you suspicion but instead drew you in.
That is until your 13th birthday and, much like many before you, you felt the tug of that dreaded bond.
You were six when you decided to loathe soulmates. Six when you swore on your very soul- your existence that you would never love your soulmate. You swore to live in misery of your own making rather than fates. No matter who they were, you would hate them.
But fate... well fate hated to be tested. So, fate did the worst thing it could. It made you fall for the one person you swore never to.
Your soulmate.
Your very own soulmate who seemed like the only light in the dark and suddenly you began questioning whether or not these feelings- these emotions you had thought were your own and genuine- were actually yours. Or if they were just fate pulling its strings and making you dance and dance and dance.
To say you were upset was an understatement and... well let's just say fate might be prideful, but you were twice as petty.
At age thirteen you shoved the emotions you had so dearly cherished so deep in your chest they seemed like nothing more than echoes of naive mind. You distanced yourself from him and only let yourself feel in your loneliest of moments.
Four years, it had nearly been four years since you had begun your battle against fate. And- and and fate was getting stronger... as you have been told. The older you get- the closer you are to your soulmate, the stronger the bond is.
Those moments... those lonely moments happened more often, and those stupid annoying emotions rose up with the beating of your traitorous heart.
Which is exactly how you ended up in the last place you ever wanted to be. Face to face with your soulmate... with them recognizing you and what you were to them.
"I'm your soulmate." Damian Fucking Wayne said his eyes locked on you as you felt your heart jump to your throat and all the color drain from your face.
"Fucking shit, " You whispered, unable to break his gaze.
Shaking-hand shaking and heart pounding at your rib cage demanding you acknowledge him-that you give in and tell him he’s right. That you are soulmates and let fate drive you. But there was something fate and your treasonous heart seemed to forget. You were one petty bitch.
Weakly smiling you let out a nervous laugh and turned, avoiding eye contact. Eyes darting around they finally settled on your bare wrist as your other hand scrambled to gather your things against your trembling chest.
"Oh- my,” Your voice cracked as you shoved your things into your bag, “would you look at the time! I need to get going."
Fingers racing over the items in your bag you went to zip it close and make your escape when your eyes rested on your final item. The book you were reading earlier. Which just so happened (damn you fate) to be right in front of Damian. Eyes raising to him, gazes latching for just a moment you did the one thing you should not. You looked down, down and back at your book before making the stupidly impulsive decision to lunge for it. Your fingers brushed the cover, nails barely scraping lines into it when a hand-warm and firm clasped around your wrist. Pulling you back towards the table in a quick tug that caused your stomach to slam against the tables side. Wincing you stabbed your nails into your palm, not daring to look up. You had fallen for his trap, the oh so obvious trap you could have avoided had you just not looked at him.
"I'm your soulmate," He said again, his voice clear and stanch as he gently pulled on your arm, clearly trying to get you to meet his eyes, "and you are mine."
Soulmate- God why did you have to care about him. Why- why-did it have to be him? Why-
why couldn’t fate just leave you alone?
Something about the tone of his voice made your heart shatter. It was almost desperate, but you couldn’t-you couldn’t allow yourself to be weak. After all, you would not let fate win. Petty- you were so violently petty and prideful- oh even fate knew this yet- it still tried... this- you wouldn't let this stand. You could-no would not allow fate to get away with even attempting this. Taking a breath in-a deep breath- you raised your chin. Steadying your mind with the thoughts of your parents, of how you needed to be around them. Calm, poised, emotionless. Ignoring the well of tears in your throat and the pressure behind your eyes you finally met his gaze.
Green. All you could see was those beautiful green eyes, wide and desperate. Yearning-yearning for you to give a reply. But the one you were about to give would only hurt those eyes, regardless, it needed to be done. One pain- one moment or time of pain and sorrow was far better than a life of them.
Slowly letting out the breaths you previously let in you tilted your head, feeling his grip on your wrist lightening.
“I do not have a soulmate," You began instantly seeing the surprise on his face-the confusion, so you continued, “I won’t have one. Not you. Not anyone. You see, I don't believe in soulmates. So, I do believe you are mistaken.”
His grip dropped but seeing the broken look on his face made your facade crumble in an instant as your heart screamed to stop. To comfort him. To take back your words and press yourself into his arms. But you were smarter than that, even if you weren’t strong enough to hide the tears anymore. Throat bobbing, you felt your mouth tremble as your eyes stung and something warm began spilling down your cheeks.
Pulling yourself away from him, you smiled a bitter smile, not even daring to acknowledge the tears you were shedding. Head high, you turned.
Voice cracking, you bid farewell, “Now, if you excuse me, I have to get going.”
Feet scrambling you nearly dashed out the door, leaving the book that got you into this mess behind. After all, it was now only going to hold harish and painful memories.
As soon as your feet touched the gravel, you ran. Tears freely spilled down your cheeks and you sobbed and panted. Mind trying it’s best to soothe the heart that had just torn itself into pieces. But there was nothing it could do. There was nothing you could do but cry and run. Run away from him. From all the pain you had and were going to feel. It was hell, yes. But at least it was yours. At least you knew how and why it had happened, at least you knew what was to come. At least you were still you right?
By the time you had finally calmed your tears-though your heart was still howling, you had made it home. Wiping your tears you took a deep breath in and held it, hoping it would steady your mind and breathing enough to face what was about to come. You hesitated for a moment, then let the breath out wiped your face again and walked up to the door. It was then you heard the shouting. The rage filled voices cursing at each other, dishes and shoes flying, shattering and knocking things about.
Hand trembling you pushed down the doorknob and walked in. The barrage of insults and dissonance of things being thrown slammed into you. Your feet shuffled across the floor as you saw the shadows in the kitchen, too caught up in their most recent argument to even acknowledge your existence-that is until they came into view.
“God you never listen!” Your father roared
“Better than sitting on my ass doing nothing all day!” Your mother countered
Quivering you slowly moved towards the staircase as their fight pushed into the living room. Your father’s hands waved as your mother rolled her eyes at him, arms crossed.
“Really that’s how you’re gonna be?”
“Yeah it is.”
“Fine then, I’ll just take this lazy ass of mine and leave!”
“GOOD!”
With that your father turned and stormed past you straight out the door, slamming it behind him. You flinched and turned to see your mother staring at you.
“Ugh! I can’t believe him,” She hissed before she shook her head, scowling, “absentee father, sitting on his ass all day while I make the money and take care of the needless kid. God, pregnant at 18- now married to that loser! My life went down the drain. If only it weren't for you...”
Those words stabbed at your heart, sinking in their little daggers in the spots they knew best. You knew she didn’t mean for you to hear them, but you always did. It wasn’t the first time you had heard things like this, but it did seem to hurt all the more due to what happened earlier this afternoon. Sniffing slightly, you lowered your head and your voice cracking as you had to fight off more tears whimpered,
“I’m sorry mom.”
As if a flip switched your mom’s brown furrowed and scowl dropped. She looked you over, concern in her eyes and she took a step forward.
“Are you okay honey? You don’t sound too good.”
Raising your head you tightly smiled and nodded, “Of course, just stressed cuz of school. I’ve got some exams coming up and it’s causing my emotions to be all over the place.”
She nodded eyes raving over you, resentment heavy in them as she plopped onto the couch with sigh, “Okay, you better be doing good in school alright? Don't want you to end up like that louse of man your father is.”
You nodded again, “Of course! Actually I was about to go and study.”
“Good, you do that.” She replied as she picked up the remote and flipped on the T.V.
You paused, for just a moment watching her as the resentment began to slide from her eyes, her face softening. She was so pretty, yet harsh lines from constant scowls and frowns bore their way onto her cheeks. Line surrounded her eyes from the tears and sleepless nights. And it was all because of you. Turning, your hands tight on your bag, you raced up the stairs, dashing towards your room where you collapsed onto the ground the second the door was closed. Hand against your face you pressed your head against the door and bit your lip. You did not have the luxury of more tears.
Turning you found yourself looking at your own reflection. The combination of your mother and father. The perfect combination. It made you wonder what they saw when they looked at you. Did they see a reflection of themselves? Or just an echo of the person they loathed to love. You knew for a fact they never saw you, just you. It was always tied with one or the other. You could tell because today your mother avoided your eyes, that was because you had your father’s eyes. So today, she must have seen him in you. At least until your hair covered your face-her hair- and she saw herself. Maybe that’s why she softened; you didn’t truly know. They loved you, yes. But only because they saw themselves in you. Because on the good days, they saw each other. Because in a way you were them. What hurt the most though, was not when they saw each other or themselves in you. But the fact that they would never see you. And if your parents, the people who were supposed to love you the most, the people who brought you into this world could never see you, who could?
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It had nearly been a week since you last saw and denied being soulmates with Damian Wayne. In said period you spent your free time dodging Damian and all his friends as well as digging your nose into every soulmate lore, history or origin you could find. While you didn’t want a soulmate, that didn’t mean Da- you soulmate should suffer because of it. So, you had made it your mission to discover if there was any way you could break the bond now. Research had told you that if one party ignored the bond for long enough it would fade for the other. But you didn’t know how long that would take and merely telling Damian you weren’t soulmates tore you up so badly that the mere sight of him sends you into tears. Therefore, you needed to find a way to break the bond. Both for yourself and for Damian.
But as far as you could tell it was impossible. Every single myth, origin and lore of soulmates explained them as the other half of each other, inseparable even incomplete without the other. Part of you hated that thought. That you were incomplete without your soulmate. Because weren’t you a person, able to function live, laugh and love all on your own? Without a soulmate? Only Greek mythology even considers you as whole without your soulmate. Though it does say that they are meant to be together and once they meet they will not want to part. Which did not read well for your plans. In Chinese mythology there was the Red String or Red Thread of Fate
A tangible string, perhaps it was something that could be broken. But from what you read it could not, at least you could not cut it or tear it with your hands. It cannot be broken. It cannot be broken. It can-
Taking a deep breath in, you rubbed your brow. It didn’t really make sense to you that the string or thread or whatever it was couldn’t be broken. It also didn’t make sense that a soulmate was to be bound to you for life. Logically speaking there had to be a loophole. Afterall no one feels their bond until they are thirteen. If you were truly bound for life, you would always feel it. Therefore, there must be a workaround. A way to break the bond or someone- or someone to break it- to remove it.
Since it is not there from the beginning it cannot be like in the Greek, Jewish or Hindu myths. But it might be connected to that string of fate theory. And there was one person who you could think of that might be able to remove or break the bond. The very person who put it there. And if the Chinese myth is right it’s Yuè Xià Lăorén or Yuè Lăo. But as far as you could tell no one was meeting old men at night right before their thirteenth birthday.
It felt like a lost cause. You doubted anyone actually ever seriously tried to break their soulmate bond. No one ever seemed to have your determination or rather stubbornness. Most people would have surely given up by now, but you desperately needed a way. Because despite how much you hated it, how much it made you hate yourself. You couldn’t help but love him. And it terrified you.
Your parents started out in love and now they were-... it’d be difficult to say what they had was anything other than torture. Day in day out fighting. Yelling and screaming. Shouting. Such anger at someone they were supposed to love. It made you wonder, were they really in love? Were they really supposed to be each other's happy ever after? Each other's eternity? If so, what did that mean for you? Did that mean you were doomed to be stuck in the same cycle of love turning to hate? Did that mean that you were going to lose a love you always told you had? Did that mean that you were going to die unloved? It was a fear- your biggest if you were being honest. That the person who was supposed to love you forever, doesn’t really love you. And you could take the chance. Not with what you knew- what you’d seen. There was no way in hell you were ever going to let that happen.
-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-
It was truly unfortunate that you just so happened to have a mother deeply involved in her job. One that resulted in her dragging you to a gala because she needed to show she had the perfect little family. What a joke. A cosmic joke as said gala was happening at none other than Wayne manor. And its host? You guessed it, Bruce Wayne himself with his gaggle of children all in attendance. How did you know this? Well, your eye caught one of the many children. The one you were trying your hardest to avoid.
Damian Mother Fucking Waye.
And it seems you caught his eye as well, because the second he looked in your direction his face lit up. That is until you turned away from him, the next you saw the color drained from his face and he practically stormed out of the room. Though any random bystander would have thought he calmly exited, you knew better. Which was valid considering you had basically spit in his face and said he wasn’t good enough. But it still hurts. Nowadays it seems that everything hurts. Though it was all probably due to the bond you were so determined to reject.
So, to dull the pain you clung to the walls of the ballroom. Heavily nursing the glass of champagne you snagged from an unassuming waiter. It had been probably close to two hours since you arrived and you hadn’t even gotten halfway through it, however you most definitely did not want your parents to see. You were underaged and they wanted to keep their ‘perfect’ image intact. Which is partially the reason why when the people began to make their rounds around the ballroom, you decided to slip out. Though you abandon your drink, you thought wandering around the manor’s halls might help you relax even if it was only a little bit.
Wandering down the darkened corridors you listened to the faint music that trailed after you as you got further and further away from the ballroom. Night encompassing each hallway you turned down it wasn’t long till the sounds of the strings playing was nothing more than a faint humming like the buzz of a fly. Darkness and silence swallowed the area-well near silence. The creaking and settling of the manor seemed to be the only sound. That is until you hear a clattering and an all too familiar voice cursing in another language.
Maybe, it was due to the slight buzz those sips of champagne gave you-maybe it was the exhaustion from the days of fighting off your feelings-or maybe it was because the pull was just too strong; you walked towards the sound and pushed a door open to find a disheveled Damian Wayne sitting in on a couch, a bottle of whisky clutched in his hands, a crystal glass at his feet with half melted ice cubes surrounding it.
He did not seem to notice your presence, so you slowly began to venture closer. Noticing his messy hair, unbuttoned shirt and missing tie. Why did he have to look so damn beautiful? Better hearing his mutterings which were half in English, you pause to listen.
“Seems like Todd was correct,” He mumbled as a hiccup stalled his sentence, “this does improve everything… or perhaps not.”
His body shifted as he hiccuped again, and had you not seen it yourself you would not have believed that the high pitched sound came from him. It almost made you laugh, but you were able to restrain yourself and move closer. This time, it seems Damian heard you as his head snapped in your direction. He blinked a few times almost as if he was trying to get water from his eyes. Head tilting he narrowed his gaze, voice slurring as he asked, “Y/N?”
Sighing you nodded and walked even closer until you stood in front of him. Smiling slightly you waved and took a deep breath in before replying, “Hi Damian.”
He blinked more, brow furrowing as he muttered something you could not catch. Sinking deeper into the couch he gave you a blank look.
“So have you come to inform me of our ‘non-existent bond’? Because I assure you if you do not wish to discuss it with me I will leave it alone.”
You raised an eyebrow and crouched so you could be eye level with him. Meeting his eyes you found yourself once again admiring their beauty.
“Really? Then thank you. I appreciate that.” You paused concern stirring so strongly in your chest you couldn’t help but let the worry take hold, “ But I’m not here for that.”
Damian sat up glaring at you and you did not move, swallowing as he got a bit closer.
“Then what are you here for?”
“I’m worried about you.”
As if it was instinctual, he replied, “And who's fault is that.”
Though he winced afterwards despite you merely sighing at his comment. Resting your chin on your knees you gave him a sad smile and nodded.
“You’re right… I owe you an explanation.”
Heart in your throat you met his eyes again and asked, “Would you let me give you one?”
Silence thrummed between the two of you for a lot longer than you would have liked. His gaze not leaving your face as you took a deep breath in and let it out. You should have done this from the start and at the very least if things go awry he probably won't remember any of this.
His hand gesturing to the place next to him he said, “Sit.”
You snorted and rose to your feet. Then the seat next to him shifted a bit awkwardly before you turned to him. He looked at you out of the corner of his eyes as he took another swig from the bottle. It stung far more than you would ever admit seeing him like this. But- but it would fade. It will fade. He won’t be like this forever. He won’t.
“So… I should probably tell you why I don’t believe in soulmates.”
He grunted in reply, and you weakly laughed, “I-hmm… this is rather hard to explain. You see my parents are soulmates and they-”
You stopped yourself, watching as he stared across the room. Realizing that telling him about this was letting him in. And you could not let him in. Biting your lip you swallowed, squeezing your eyes shut as you once again fought off tears.
“I really don’t like their relationship. I hate it. And and to me it seems everyone with a soulmate is miserable. They aren’t happy. Shouting, arguing, fighting. I will not risk the chance of being like my parents. I refuse.”
He was looking at you now. Brow furrowed and the bottle slipped between his fingers. Your voice cracked and you winced, swallowing as you shrugged.
“I- i am a coward. I refuse to take any chances because I don’t want to get hurt.”
The unspoken ever again hung on your lips as your parents' rage flashed through your mind. Fingers picking at one another you looked down. Unable to keep eye contact without crying.
“I’m scared and- and worried and and I- I’m so sorry. You deserve better and i-”
His hand was over your mouth and you blinked in confusion looking up to see him pinching his nose, bottle still in hand.
“Please silence your excuses.” Damian snapped, “I will not hear anyone talk about you that way.”
Something jolted in you and you froze, tears springing to your eyes, you nodded and he removed his hand. Fingers darting to wipe away tears you began to turn from him. His hand batted your fingers away and cupped one of your cheeks. The other still clutching the whiskey bottle half cupped the other. Damian pressed his forehead against yours and looked you in the eyes.
“I care not that you are a coward. I care not that you are running away. I understand your unease, I understand your logic. But I disagree. I can do no better than you, my soulmate. My other half. I will be here for you and will ease your fears, I will drive your worries away and treat your scars. Emotional or otherwise. I am here for you. I do not know what I have to do for you to understand I am yours. Whole and solely yours. As you are mine. Please- I beg you. Tell me what I must do for you to allow me to love you to my fullest capacity.”
Unable to look away, your heart taking control as that bitter bond turned soft and sweet you began to cry. Tears spilling down your face, you pressed your forehead more against his, words slipping from you before you could even think.
“Be forever mine and let me be forever yours,” You whispered.
Something softened in his eyes, a warmth in them you desperately wanted to see but hoped you never did. He began to lean in a slight smile tugging at the corners of his mouth as his hands shifted, the bottle falling from his grasps as he muttered,
“Was that ever in doubt?”
You tilted your head and his lips pressed against yours. He tasted of bitterness, a darkness that burned so sharply it had you clinging to him. Hands bunched in the cloth of his shirt you found yourself leaning in. His arm wrapped around your waist and as he pulled you in tighter, body shifting as he couldn’t get you close enough. As if there wasn’t a way to hold you where he was near enough. It was as if he wanted to shift-sinking-melting completely and totally into you.
Air, you had no air left, but who needed air? He was here. His touch gentle and constant, reassuring as he pressed against you, gripping you as if he was terrified the second he let you go, you would disappear. And he was right.
You broke apart both gasping for air and his grip loosened. Foreheads pressed against each other he smiled, a smile that sent your already raging heart racing. His hand rested against your cheek, fingers playing with your hair. Squeezing his eyes shut he muttered,
“I love you.”
Your heart skittered and-
Tug, there was a tug a mother fucking tug that made your whole-body ache. One that stole the air you had just barely regained. One that sent shivers up your spine and knocked some sense into you.
You couldn’t breathe. Standing up suddenly, your head spun. Blinking a few times as tears sprang into your eyes you shook your head.
“I’m sorry,” You whispered, “I'm sorry, I’m sorry.”
And with that, you bolted from the room. Faintly hearing Damian calling after you, you rush down the hall brushing past a butler whose name you think is Alfred. He gives you a soft smile and you nod, quickly wiping away the tears. He paused but you kept moving. You had to get out of here. You had to get out of here now. No matter what it took.
Feet nearly tripping over the other you stumbled back into the ballroom. There would be hell to pay later, you knew it. But if you stayed any longer you could get hurt beyond repair. Allowing the feeling of everything that had just occurred loose, you promptly burst into tears as you stumbled towards your stunned parents. Your mother frantically moved to you as your father’s eyes widened and he began speaking to the people before them.
“Y/N, Y/N honey we’re in front of a lot of people. Can this wait?” Your mother whispered as she got closer.
Sniffling you collapsed into your mother’s arms, feeling her embrace again for the first time in nearly a decade. Trembling as sobs escaped you, you were able to get out.
“I want to go home. Please. Please. Let me go home.”
At first, she didn’t reply, then she began moving you towards the door.
“Alright. Alright. Let’s get you home.”
She did not even turn in your father’s direction. After all, they had done what they always do, taken separate cars. Unable to quell the tears, you let your mother guide you out the door before he came to pull you back into fate’s vicious plot.
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Two days, you hadn’t left your room in two days. Not that your parents had noticed, not that anyone really did. You doubted anyone noticed your absences from class. You hoped no one would notice truthfully. You couldn’t bear the thought of seeing his face again. It was driving you crazy. So you locked yourself in your room and hoped-prayed-that these growing feelings would just die. Or maybe you could just die. That sounded like a solid solution as well. It was part of the reason why despite the late hour, despite living in Gotham you had unlocked and opened your window.
There was a sound that awoke you, yanking you from the nightmares that never seemed to cease. And as you opened your eyes to the familiar shapes and silhouettes in your room you found one that did not belong there.
"Who are you?" You whispered to the woman hiding in the shadows, not really caring if acknowledging her would lead her to strike.
After all, who would lurk in the shadows of someone's room while they were sleeping unless you planned to kill them. It was a relief of sorts, that you were more than likely going to die soon. It would help you feel less guilt about Damian, about the situation that occurred a few nights before and the feelings that refused to listen to reason.
Stepping into the moonlight the woman towered before you. Half her face tilted towards the light and you blinked twice almost recognizing it- but- but that couldn't be possible. There was no way you knew this woman. You hardly knew anyone, let alone an murder or assassin who would sneak into sleeping peoples rooms.
"You don't have to worry about that.” She replied in a soft voice, her accent reminding you of something-something…something!
You just couldn’t quite place your finger on what though. It nagged and nipped at your mind, tugging and swirling in faint recognition you could not connect.
The woman took a step forward, her black hair swaying as she crossed her arms, her tone sharp and barbed, “I think who you are is a more important question.”
Her gaze did not leave you and you adjusted your blanket before glancing towards the open window almost blankly saying,
"Nobody special I can assure you."
This caused the woman’s posture to relax a little. She hummed slightly as you crossed your legs and set your elbows on your knees.
"Hmm, really?"
Nodding you rested your face in your hands as you looked at her shadowy figure. She seemed kind, in a way. She was at least talking to you before killing you. That was something was it not?
"Just the byproduct of fate's meddling and destructive hands."
"Ah, your parents are soulmates?' Her stance relaxed even more and you noted how from what you could see her outfit was nothing like the things the Gotham vigilantes wore.
"Unwilling but yes, soulmates."
It was more of a snort than a reply, but it didn’t seem to phase the woman as she rested herself on your desk the moon light allowing you to see the curve of her jaw and shape of her nose. Familiar features that made your gut churn.
"Oh, oh. I see. They did not choose-"
"To have me?” You interrupted with a sigh, shrugging you nodded, “I guess you could say that."
Silence followed and you saw the woman’s eyes narrow. She crossed her arms again, stance tightening.
"... you do not seem the type to share your innermost troubles with a stranger, why are you talking to me?"
Pulling your face from your hands you gave her a shrug as a yawn slipped from your lips, "Well, for one I think you're here to kill me and two... I've needed to tell someone for a while. Why not a perfect stranger?"
"Your parent's fate troubles you that much?" Her voice seemed to begin carrying concern, which only troubled you because it made you think there would be a possibility she wouldn’t kill you.
"They are living proof- hell I am living proof that soulmates shouldn't be forced together…” You paused crossing your arms with a scowl, “and because fate is cruel, I have a soulmate too. Despite how awful they are."
"Your soulmate is awful?"
Something in her tone said she did not believe what she was asking in the slightest. Which was true, yet it still caused that buzzing familiarity to ring just a bit louder.
"n-no, he's not.”
Squeezing your eyes shut you sighed deeply, running your hands along your face, “ He's kind and- and all I could ask for but- but... how do I know he's all I want? How do I know any of this- any of my feelings are mine? How do I know that it isn't fate pulling my strings and wanting me to dance? How do I know he won’t leave? That the bond will only become apparent when we fight and won’t exist otherwise? When the love is gone and only the bond remains? How will I know that I won’t be abandoned again? That I won't be hurt again? That I will gain a love that will last? I won’t. Not to mention even if I didn't like him... I would have to be with him."
"No,” The woman scoffed, “you wouldn't, dear."
"Yes, I would. My parents- they tried and now- now I live in the shambles of a home. They are together because of that damned bond even though they hate each other." You were crying now, of course you were, "fate does not like to be ignored and I don't like to be told what to do."
Angrily grabbing a tissue you blew your nose, faintly hearing the woman laugh. From what you could see, she had a look in her eyes that seemed soft- understanding. One you most certainly did not expect your killer to have.
"Oh my, really?" She mumbled head turned towards the window.
"Yes! I'd rather live in a hell I have control of, a hell I made rather than one fate forced upon me. If- if I ignore it enough... I heard it will fade for him, I- I will still feel it but- but because he tried, he will be spared. He'll have a chance- one I never had. And though- though I can't truly tell if these feelings are mine, it's all I want. I love him. I love him”
You stopped yourself trembling as you said it yet again, “I love him.”
Nodding you continued on, “and… I want him to be happy without me. Because- because I won't give way to fate, not even for him."
"Hmmm. I have a question for you.”
“Yes?” You pulled the tissue box closer to you sure more tears would come.
“Do you really want to die?”
“Excuse me?”
The woman shrugged, waving a hand, “It’s just, it hardly seems to me that you want to die. Rather it seems like you want to live.”
"What- I, I’m sorry I-." You were at a loss for words.
She was smiling as she replied with a shrug, “You have told me of a cause you wish to live for, no? To fight against the soulmate bond. While I personally disagree with your choice, I hardly think dying will do anything other than let the bond win.”
“Wha-... I-,” You sputtered, mainly because what she said made sense.
It made an insane amount of sense. So much so that it had your head spinning. Why exactly did you think dying was the best option? You may not have the best life, but it was yours right?
“I’m-I’m sorry.” The whisper escaped not entirely directed at the woman but rather just as a declaration in general.
The tears on your face felt silly and you blew your nose again as the woman sighed. Causing silence to spin about the room until she remarked,
"I believe I should be the one apologizing."
You laughed, wiping the tears from your face, "Why?"
"Because I'm not here to kill you."
Something in you skipped a beat and you shook your head. Of course she isn’t. Who would want you dead after all. You hadn’t done anything that would cause a reason to be killed.
"Oh darn." You snorted, rubbing the back of your hand across your face, "Here I am looking like a fool asking for something I don’t even want from someone who can’t even give it to me. Fate is cruel… Though life does seem crueler."
"Yes," She muttered looking over her shoulder at the window, "indeed it is."
A figure loomed where she looked, a familiar figure in green, yellow and red. The woman smiled at you again and she moved towards him patting him on the shoulder before climbing out the window.
“It was nice to meet you Y/N.”
Blinking in confusion you latched onto the vigilante who was now looming in between your room and the outside, "Robin? What are you doing here?"
He sighed, the woman disappearing as he rested on the window frame, "I am afraid it is quite difficult for me to explain at the moment."
"Wha-.... wait-wait."
In the silence of the night, with the slight breeze trailing in from the window where Robin was perched, you felt a tug. A heart wrenching tug you had felt just the other night. A tug that sent aches all over and made your throat tighten.
"...you're-oh."
Biting, you lip you fought off tears as he slowly entered your room. Breathing deeply, you began picking at your fingers before you finally found the courage to look him in the eyes.
He was right in front of you as tears spilled down your cheeks and through sharp stabs of pain you tightly smiled remarking,
"...hi Damian."
He was silent and you bit down harder, weakly you took in a breath. His voice was soft in reply,
"Y/N... are you- are you alright?"
You didn't know what to say. After all, he must have heard something... then again, he might not have but-
"How-" Your voice cracked as you avoided looking at him despite him being so close, but it was hard as you could feel the heat from his body, "how much... How much did you hear?"
His was quiet and you squeezed your eyes shut, heart dropping as you tasted blood. Pain dancing across your lips and air fighting to leave you. A tiny sob escaped you and you took a ragged breath in as you opened your eyes facing him. Rob-no Damian raised a hand and brushed it against your face before he leaned in. His lips almost pressed against your ear he said,
"I heard everything."
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#batboys#y/n#batfam#reader#damian wayne#batboys x y/n#damian wayne x reader#technically part 2#i just wanted to give it a new name#feeling evil evil evil#deal with it <3#Enjoy the suffering yall :D#robin x reader#robin#soulmates! au#soulmate!reader#y/n x damian wayne#damian wayne x y/n#reader x damian wayne#requests#robin x y/n#the angst is so strong#my brain went *doopdeedoop* everyone needs to cry#hehehehehehehehehe#very very proud if i do say so myself#writing upgrade#baby fluff#technical cliff hanger#I hope u get mad at me#itd make my day
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I CAN’T BREATHE AT THE THOUGHT OF YOU!
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NOW PLAYING TELEKINETIC
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╰┈➤ VOODOO ➤ TELEPATHIC
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#ew my art#bnha#mha#shinsou hitoshi#digital art#artists on tumblr#hitoshi shinsou#boku no hero academia#my hero academia#please dont let this flop yall#im so proud of this one#i made my husband model for me so i could do this#hitoshi#shinsou#shinso#i was debating whether or not to make it upside down#but my husband said he liked it better right side up#so an optional image is if u turn it upside down
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