#so I think imma dip for a couple days

[diremoone]

two times in a row I’ve gotten two back to back four-stars lmao. fine alhaitham you win this argument. me and my hubby jiyan gonna go sit somewhere else 😌😌

(also sethos is now c2 and goddamn his bow shots are so fucking fast literally the speed of mach jesus I didn’t really notice until now lol)

[number-one-hog-hater]

Just kinda saying shit

[housemdfever]

Hey pookies! I attempted to write a fanfic for the first time in five years. I hope y'all like it! 🫶🏼

✮ ⋆ ˚｡𖦹 ⋆｡°✩

Dr. Robert Chase x (Fem)Reader

⊹₊ ˚‧︵‿₊୨୧₊‿︵‧ ˚ ₊⊹

This party is shit

Sitting in an empty corner, I try to avoid interacting with anyone at this stupid company party.

Wish we could dip

I only showed up because I thought I might finally have the confidence to talk to him.

Go anywhere but here

Four hours in and I still haven't even gone in his vicinity.

Don't take a hit

Everyone around me, black out drunk. I can't believe people acted like this around their coworkers. I can't believe doctors would act like this around anyone.

Don't kiss my lips

Unable to see him, but I still hoped he hadn't gotten himself black out drunk like others at this party.

And please don't drink more beer

Catching a glimpse of him, I see him head to the refreshment tables; which I was sitting directly behind.

Imma crawl out of the window now

Without thing, I jump out of the closets window. I couldn't bare to interact with him in a place like this; what was I thinking?

Cuz I don't like anyone around

I can't believe I just did that. Letting it all sink in; Not only I did I come to party for a boy but I jumped out of a window too. I'm so stupid.

Kinda hope you're followin' me out

I stand up and dust myself off, I look back through the window. His eyes meet mine, I blush; realizing now he watched me up through the window. My flusteredness quickly turns to panic.

Cuz this is definitely not my crowd

After a couple seconds of staring, he walks out view. SHIT!

Nineteen but you act twenty five now

Trying to figure out how I'm going to deal with this. The front door swings open and I see a tall figure making his way towards me.

Knees weak

I froze in fear wondering what I would say to him.

But you talk pretty fly wow

"Hey, are you okay? The party is inside." He says with a small laugh, trying to make small talk.

Ripped jeans and a cup that you just downed

I look him up and down before responding, "Uh yea, I'm fine."

Take me where the music ain't too loud

"Let me guess, too loud, too many people, not a drinker?" He winks at me. "All of the above," I respond unable to look him in the eyes.

Trade drinks

He hands me the water bottle, he had grabbed for himself. "Here take it," he hands me the bottle and I accept. I thank him for the kind gesture.

But you don't even know her

"I've seen you around the office but never got a chance to speak to you. I'm Dr. Chase, and you are?" He says taking a seat in the grass next to me. "(Y/N)" I respond still a little nervous and kind of glad he had notice me around.

Save me 'til the party is over

"So what's a pretty girl like you doing a party and not living it up?" He smirks. "Pretty girl?" I think to myself blushing at his comment. "Oh I just figured maybe should try putting myself out there, but I think I made the wrong choice." I respond shyly. "Putting yourself out there aye? Does that mean you're single?" His questions get more mischievous. My face turns bright red. "I didn't mean it like that, but I am single" I stutter trying to keep my composer as to not let him find out; I came to this party for him. He perks up at my answer. "Well then, I hope you don't mind me doing this." I didn't get the chance to ask him what "this" was.

Kiss me in the seat of your rover

He grabs my chin and pulls his face to mine. Only centimeters away, he smirks at my obviously flusteredness; he pulls me into a kiss.

Real sweet

Without another word, he drops a piece of paper in my lap with his number. He walks back inside, while I sit here stunned at what just happened.

But I wish you were sober

Tomorrow is going to be a crazy day back at the office.

[adhd-merlin]

Hey I heard you wanna yap so I'm here to talk Arthuriana books ᕕ( ᐛ )ᕗ I've got a whole spreadsheet but I've only recently started reading 21st century ones, including Bliss & Blunder which is currently my highest ranked out of the bunch but I know it's gonna be usurped by the one I'm currently reading - The Bright Sword by Lev Grossman. If you can handle long books (almost 700 pages) then you have to read it, it's so well written and goes into the more neglected knights like Bedivere and Palomides (and as with all modern stuff some of the knights get to be gay as a treat). I'm still only 1/4 of the way through but if it stays as good as it's been so far then oh boy. Anyways let me know what your favourite 21st Arthuriana is!

Yaaay yapping time <3

Ooh I can’t believe you’ve got a spreadsheet, haha. I’m fascinated by you spreadsheet people! (I’m not a spreadsheet kind of person, I’m a “I’ll write a random note on my phone that I’ll soon forget about… unless I remember” kind of person).

thank you for the rec!! Imma be honest I don’t think I can handle long books right now, because I’m struggling with concentration, but it sounds interesting! I’ll add it to my wish list in case I feel inspired to read it in future (I use the app Bookshelf to keep track of books read/to read, though there’s not much to keep track of these days lol. I like it because it’s super basic; I don’t even think you need to create an account? Can’t remember. But I can’t be bothered with Goodreads anymore.)

Anyways let me know what your favourite 21st Arthuriana is!

Bliss & Blunder is the only modern one I’ve read actually! I haven’t read many Arthuriana books? I’ve read about Arthuriana texts/adaptations more than I’ve read any actual texts lol. I like hearing about all the lore! But I love thinking/reading about adaptations in general, I think the process itself is so interesting? Like, what elements of a story one chooses to focus on or to discard; what makes a character… well, themselves. If you put Lancelot in the 21st century, what would he be like? How much can you change a story and still recognise it as the same? I find it fascinating to think about!* And obviously Arthurian texts have been inspiring so many people over the centuries across different media, so there’s a lot to explore in that sense.

I would like to read some of the “source” texts at some point, though they are a bit daunting. I gave Le Morte d'Arthur a try and abandoned it quite soon, but I’d like to dip my toes in it again, read some select chapters perhaps. I’d also like to read The Knight of the Cart because Lancelot is such an interesting character.

In terms of modern adaptations (as in, written in modern times), I would like to check out The Once and Future King (the Ill Made Knight in particular, don’t think I could read all the books)—I’ve read contrasting opinions on T.H. White’s work but it’s had a great influence on subsequent adaptations (I think?) that I want to see what all the fuss is about. And I love the whole love triangle drama. An affair so messy we’re still talking about it centuries later? I’m so here for it.

I’ve read a couple of random quotes from Steinbeck’s The Acts of King Arthur and His Noble Knights that made me go “oh I should check this out!”, so that it also on my radar. (Have you read it? If so, what did you think of it?)

*I was in the Sherlock fandom for a while and that’s one of the things I enjoyed about it—all the different adaptations that existed about the same source material. And I don’t even care about Conan Doyle’s stories that much (lol sorry Arthur) so it really was mainly about the adaptations for me. I was studying Russian at uni at the time, so I checked out the “classic” Soviet Sherlock Holmes series, and also the Russian TV adaptation that came out in 2013. I greatly enjoyed the latter because of the way it played with and subverted elements of the original canon—it was great fun! Maybe my favourite Sherlock Holmes adaptation. But Vitaly Solomin's Watson ("Soviet" Watson) has a special place in my heart, he was so cute. Did you know there's a genderbent Holmes & Watson Russian adaptation? And they get to crossdress to get into a gentleman's club. Fascinating. I also think Jonny Lee Miller was great in Elementary, though I’m not a big fan of the procedural format. I did abandon that show after series… three, I think? but I still think he made an interesting Sherlock Holmes. His acting was probably wasted on that series to be honest!)

[letsrevince]

what's the greek joke? 👁

ok lol first the context for the rest of the class:

so, there is a raunchy and nsfw joke in greek about a village man and a village woman. It is a hot day in the summer, and it is in the older days when there was no air conditioning. These two are tasked with bringing water from the well up the hill. They get there, get the water, and are feeling thirsty, so they drink some

They also are feeling hot. Traditional greek clothing is layered, so it checks out. The man is like "I got an idea to cool off", so he takes off his tights, lifts his skirts, and goes indeed balls deep into the bucket of water. He feels so refreshed and tells the woman to do the same

She tries, but alas she cannot reach the water. The man thinks for a bit, and comes up with a brilliant idea

"I will dip my thing first, and then imma put it in your thing, and that's how you'll cool down!"

They try it, it's a big success, so they do it a couple time. Then, the woman in shock and horror says "hey wait this is sex!"

to which the man replies "all the ladies keep telling me this shit, I give up helping!" and leaves with the bucket

[casspurrjoybell-20]

FOOLS IN LOVE - Chapter 36 - Part 1 BOOK THREE: 'Fools Fall in Love' Trilogy

*Warning - Adult Content*

Noah Wright

"You may now kiss the bride," the officiant announced with a big smile as everyone cheered, clapping as my older brother dipped his newly wed wife into a kiss.

"That was so beautiful," Sam gushed when I met him at our designated table along with my mom.

Ever since the night my mother and I talked everything out, I've been more open to talking to her.

We even started a Sunday family night where her, my brother and now sister in law come over to have dinner and hang out.

I still had my doubts about mom but I was trying and so was she.

"Yes, it was," my mother agreed tearfully.

"Now you two are next."

The water I took a sip of went down the wrong pipe leaving me coughing before I responded.

"Slow down, Ma, I need to get this ankle bracelet off me first."

"Don't worry," Sam spoke to my mom.

"I'm already saving for it," he winked at her while I raised my eyebrows.

"Oh really?" I questioned.

"Hmm," he grinned.

I didn't have time to continue that conversation as the DJ announced.

"Let's give it up for Mr. and Mrs. Wright."

Everyone started cheering as Maggie and Nathan came out onto the reception floor, hand in hand.

I wasn't one to get nervous often but standing up in front of a crowd of people to give a speech I wasn't prepared for was making me wish I could've smoked beforehand.

"Ladies and gentlemen, if you can all direct your attention to the best man, Noah Wright who's starting us off with tonight's speeches."

"You'll do great," Sam encouraged me in a whisper.

Sam was right, I should've wrote it down.

I cleared my throat as I was handed the mic.

"For those who don't know me, I'm Nathan's younger and better looking brother," I got some laughs out of that which made me feel slightly better.

"They say a best man's speech should last as long as the groom in the bedroom, so Imma keep this short," more people laughed,

"Growing up with my brother wasn't always easy, not only can he be a pain in the ass but he didn't always make the right choices back then. Being with Maggie, however, is the best decision he ever made. Their love for each other is truly inspirational and apparent every time they look at each other. So, uh, if we can all raise a glass for the newly wed," I spoke as I raised my glass looking to Nathan and Maggie.

"To a lifetime of inspirational love," and everyone followed along as I finish my speech with a sip of water.

"That was sweet," Sam gushed again when I took my seat.

"I guess it wasn't too bad," I replied with a chuckle, thankful to be out of the spotlight.

"I need to smoke."

"No you don't, you need to dance," Sam insisted and after Maggie's maid of honor speech and the married couple's first dance, floor was open for everyone to join in.

When a slow song came up, I pulled Sam to me and wrapped my arms around his waist.

"So, you're saving up, huh?" I asked Sam with a smirk.

"That's what one does when they plan on spending forever with their partner," he replied matter-of-factly.

I chuckled.

"We'll I'm glad we have the same plan then."

That granted me a cheeky grin before going in for a kiss.

"You're gonna have to catch the bouquet first," I jested.

"Oh, I'm definitely getting that bouquet," Sam said with confidence and when the time came for the bouquet toss, Sam made good on his promise, catching the flying flowers, then turned to me with a broad smile.

"Beautiful wedding," I told my brother as we watched our significant other's mingle and laugh together.

"Thanks, bro. One day we'll be at your queer wedding with rainbows everywhere and Charlie XCX blaring through the speakers."

"Ha, ha," I said sarcastically.

He clapped my shoulder.

"Just don't fuck it up again."

"I don't plan on it," I said truthfully.

"Good 'cause I think my wife just found her gay best friend."

"Oh, my boys," our mother interrupted as she squeezed us into a hug.

"So handsome," she complemented before pulling back.

"I'm so thankful to be able to experience this wonderful moment with you both."

"I'm glad you're here mom," Nathan said and I agreed.

Sam walked up to us, slipping his hand in mine.

"Can I steal Noah away for a second?" he asked.

"Of course," my mom said.

"I should go find my wife," was Nathan's reply before Sam dragged me away from the reception area.

**********

"Where are you taking me?" I wondered but I had a feeling I knew.

"I might have stumbled upon a secret location."

I laughed.

"Why do I have a feeling that you actually stumbled."

"Hush your handsome face," he commanded as he guided me to a door that lead to a storage space.

"I've been dying to take this sexy tux off of you."

"Is this our tradition now? Sneaking off to some random closet at social events?" I questioned, as I was escorted inside with the door closing behind us.

Sam flicked on a light as he said.

"I hope so," and pulled me into a kiss.

"Me too," I agreed as my hands went into his hair and kissed him back but only for a moment before I pulled back, my hands going to his sides.

"I just want you to know that I do plan on marrying you. To be honest, I wasn't as calm and collected getting arrested as I led on. The thought of being away from you scares the hell outta me. I love you, Sam and there's no one else if it's not you."

With a smile broader than life, Sam pressed his lips to mine.

"We really are two fools in love, huh?"

I chuckled.

"Yeah, we definitely are."

[michelleleewise]

Loki's Di-Lama 🦙🦙🦙- The good, the Bad and the Loki.....

Pairing: Eventual Loki x Reader but right now he thinks she's a stinky mess and she thinks he's a hot jerk. Together they're a hot mess.

Warnings: Some innuendos and euphemisms about what Loki is packing down under and the effect it may have on some people. 🤨🤨 mild swearing, attempted poisoning, pining, enemies to lovers.....no llamas or cats were harmed in the making if this fic, and imma dip into some implied smut.....nothing graphic tho don't worry!!

Summary: In the land of Asgard, King Loki is selfish and vain. His arrogance causes others to plot against him. When he's turned into a llama, will humble peasant Y/N help Loki even though he plans to knock down her beloved village and build...a closet for his clothes?!

A/N: written with the wonderful and amazing @xorpsbane as my coauthor, who will be picking up the pen for the next part!! 💚💚

Part four-

"Aaaahhhhh ruuuunnnn!" Nat heard scream from her kids room. She ran up to see what was going on when she saw her son flailing on the bed "Hey brucie, what's wrong?" She asked shaking him awake "I had the worst dream, auntie y/n was running through the forest being chased by jaguars and there was this squirrel names jason.....and she fell and cascaded down a raging river of DEATH!" He said panting "hey hey your aunt Is fine, she just went back to see the king." Nat said smiling "did you tell her to take panties? He'll definitely see her then." He said "well I had a dream auntie kissed a llama!" Your daughter wamda ran in jumping on the bed. "Ew..that would never happen." Brucie said "it could!" She yelled "NU UH!" He yelled "YA HUH!" She yelled back "alright!! Go to sleep you two." Nat said turning the light off as the children continue to bicker.

Meanwhile......deep in the forest........

You dove into the river head first, coming up shaking your head, looking over seeing Loki laying on his back with his tongue sticking out. "Good...stupid llama." You growled swimming over to the bank grabbing your soap. You tried to ignore his constant rude remarks about how you smelled but if you were being honest it was making you a tad self conscious, so you decided to wash up while he slept. You lathered the bar in your hand, scrubbing the last couple of days off of you inhaling the sweet scent of the soap before getting enough on your hands to wash your hair. Dipping your head under to rinse you came up seeing Loki looking at you wide eyed "Holy shit! What the hell are you doing!?" You yelled sinking down, trying to forget your chest was entirely exposed to him two seconds ago.

"Um...well you see....I was....and you were....I'm gonna go." He said darting off back to where you made camp. Your cheeks burned with embarrassment but the fact that he was flustered made you smile. You got out, drying off you put on some clean clothes that you had packed before walking back over by the fire. Sitting down you looked over seeing Loki's back to you "it's safe to turn around you know." You said laughing as he grabbed your poncho with his teeth and slowly walked over to you dropping it next to you "umm, so thanks....for that" He said looking everywhere but at you. "Well, I know it's not panties but..." you trailed off picking it up. "So, I was um thinking, maybe I could possibly consider building my closet...somewhere else." He said quietly looking down.

You looked at him wide eyed for a minute "does this have anything to do with you seeing my breasts a minute ago?" You asked "what!? Absolutely not! I've seen lots of breasts....more then you I'm sure." He said bragginly "I'm sure." You smiled pulling your poncho on "see here, I can have any breasts I choose...and I do not need stinky peasent breasts thank you." He sneered walking off making you roll your eyes "so...your choosing to be nice?" You asked "Well yeah, is that so hard to believe?" He asked as you stared at him. "I mean, there are nicer places for a closet instead of that dirt heap you call a village." He said.

You glared at him a minute, trying to decide if he was lying "what is your problem?" He asked "so, I take you back to the palace and you'll leave my village alone?" You asked "thats what I said....your ears do work don't they?" He asked sarcastically. You held out your hand deciding to trust him when he lifted his hoof "don't shake unless you mean what you say." You said stently as he looked at you hesitantly before shaking your hand. "Awesome! Let's get you back to your pantie collection." You said standing up. "Thank the norns!" He said following behind you. You made it to a clearing, seeing the bridge you smiled "ok, once we reach the other side its only about an hour." You said as he pushed past you "kings first..." he said starting to cross the bridge.

You made it about half way, hearing the wood groan with your combined weight. "Hey, maybe we should..." you started as a board cracked, sending you down between the two planks, barely grabbing a piece of rope before plummeting to the river below. "Loki! Help me!" You yelled, seeing him walk back looking down at you "mm....no I'm good." He said smiling "your just gonna leave me here?" You asked glaring at him "Well, I had considered having you flogged....maybe imprisoned, but I do like this" He smiled "now if you'll excuse me, I have people to see and panties to collect." He said turning around. "But we shook hands you ungrateful little..." you yelled gripping the rope.

"You know, it doesn't really count...if you don't have hands!" He smirked "ok...bu-bye." He said walking off again when a board snapped sending him down with you, his limbs tangling in the ropes "Oh gods, are you ok?" You asked seeing the panicked look on his face "y..yeah...I think so." He said shakely "ok good" You said kicking him hard, sending him into the cliff face. "That's for lieing to me!" You yelled he swung back knocking you into the other cliff face "that's for kidnapping me and making me smell you you stinky peasant..oh, and I'm still gonna knock your village down." He said laughing "Hey! Now wait just a minute!" He said as you pushed off, ramming into him hard knocking him to the other side.

"I don't know why I risked my life for a selfish little ass like you!" You yelled bracing against the cliff "I used to think there was good in eveyone, but your just rotten!" You yelled "awww now i feel really bad... bad llama." He mocked slapping himself. "I should have let you die out there from your own stupidity, and all my problems would be solved." You sneered "Well that makes you stinky aaaand stupid then." He sneered from the other side. "Let's end this" you glared "peasents first." He smiled. You both pushed off, ready to rip him apart when you heard several cracks above you. You both stopped, looking up seeing the bridge fall apart "shit.." you sighed as you both plummeted down towards the river, the canyon walls closing in on you the further you fell.

"Put your feet out." You yelled, doing the same when yout backs met, you both sliding to a stop. Looking down seeing alligators swarming in the river just below you "oh my gods we're gonna die! I'm too pretty to die!" He cried out. "What are we going to do?" He asked, your grip beginning to slip. You looked up seeing a rope hanging down from the now broken bridge "ok, stop whining, I have an idea." You said "I beg your pardon. I was not whining." He said sternly "would you please shut up for once." You said "ok, this is what we're gonna do." You reached back, looping your arms with his "ok, push against my back, and we're going to walk up the cliff." You said.

"And go." You said, pressing yourself against him as you slowly made your way up. "Ok, almost....there..." you said reaching up grabbing the rope, pulling on it seeing it tangled in a small bush higher up "shit...it's stuck." You said pulling hard "no worries, take your time...I have all day." He sighed when you pulled as hard as you could, not realizing there was a nest of scorpions until it was soon late. "Your smell is getting a tad overwhelming, so if you could...." he trailed off feeling something fall onto his chest "SCORPIONS!" He screeched, letting go of your arms he began flailing when his feet slipped. "Shit...Loki!" You yelled grabbing his tail before he fell, slamming him into the cliff wall. "Why is it always my face!" He yelled.

You looked down, trying to figure out how you were going to pull you both up when you felt something slide down your back "aaahhh no no no!" You screamed, slamming your back against the cliff "what are you..." Loki trailed off, hearing a strange sound coming from a hole in the cliff face "umm...y/n..." he said trying to get your attention as you continued frantically trying to get them off you. "Y/N!" He yelled "WHAT!?" You yelled back looking down as a swarm of bats shot out of the rock into Loki's face. "What is happening!?" You yelled, trying to pull him up as he failed and swung frantically trying to get them away from him when he bolted up the cliff face, dragging you behind him, holding the rope for dear life. "Loki...stop!" You yelled when he jumped, you both landing hard at the top of the cliff.

You groaned, rolling over seeing him wide eyed and panting "are...are you ok?" You asked "y..yeah I think so.." he trailed off trying to stand up. You got to your knees, looking down trying to comprehend everything that just happened when the rock beneath you shifted and began to slide down "Y/n!" Loki yelled, grabbing your poncho in his mouth he pulled you back throwing you aside as the rock broke off and tumbled down the cliff. "Oo...did you see that! I snatched you from the jaws of death itself." He bragged puffing his chest out "oh...I'm a crumbly canyon wall and I'm taking you with...well not today sir" He yelled. Was he dancing? "Mm uh huh uh huh uh huh..." he continued as you sat up "y..you...saved me life.." you trailed off making him freeze.

"I..well...I still need you to get back to the palace." He said sternly. "No...you could have made it...you like me." You smirked standing up "what!? Absolutely not..." he said looking around "Come on...admit it..." you said walking closer "nope..nu uh..." he said looking around "Loooki...." you cooed smiling "what's the big deal!? No one's that heartless." He rushed out, his nervousness making you giggle "don't read too much into it...it was a one time thing." He said non chalantly. "Yeah...ok." you said brushing the dirt off of you. "Well, with that bridge out, it's a four day walk to the palace, we should get going." You said walking back the way you came "your...your still taking me back?" He asked running up to you. "I said i would didn't i?" You said shrugging. "Well yeah....but I'm still building my epic closet when I get back." He smiled walking beside you.

"Well, four days is a pretty long time..who knows, you may change your mind." You said smiling. "Riiiight...." he said "so...what are the chances you'll carry me?" He asked nudging you. "Not Good." You said looking ahead. You walked side by side for awhile, chancing small glances at him smiling, as much as you hated to admit it the ass was growing on you. Underneath that spoiled, pampered facade there was a decent man, you just had to pull him out. Maybe in the next four days you could...

💚🦙💚🦙💚🦙💚🦙💚🦙💚🦙💚🦙💚🦙💚🦙💚

@vbecker10 @lokisgoodgirl @sinsandguilt @high-functioning-lokipath @mochie85 @slytherclaw1227 @jaidenhawke @budugu @schizonephilim @lokidokieokie @holdmytesseract @your-taste-on-my-lips @lokixryss @asgardianprincess1050 @tallseaweed @aniar4wniak @sekaishell @lokispetblogs @loopsisloops @trojanaurora @lonadane @all-envy-suyu @yelkmelk @stupidthoughtsinwriting @123forgottherest @silverfire475 @goblingirlsarah @commanding-officer @glitterylokislut @kkdvkyya @cueloki @daggers-and-mischief @sititran @witchyblue @verycollectivecreator @nixymarvelkins @chantsdemarins @shinraski @usagishira @nightshadelm @filthyhiddles @dukes2581 @assemblingavenger @lulubelle814 @irishhappiness @wolfsmom1 @luvlady-writes @lovingchoices14 @thomase1

[mythiccheroacademia]

Hey!! Could we please get more sugar daddy fics with a black reader ofc 😋 idk if you've done shoto already but that'd be nice or hawks and deku💕

A/N: “wrist on glitter, waist on thinner, imma show you how to bag a eight-figure nigga” 👅💋 I enjoyed this way too much

All characters are 18+

Warnings: it got a lil spicy so imma put the line 

Todoroki Shouto:

this mf has money to burn 

we all know todoroki came out the womb w cash from his hair to his ass 

he’s on some “yes, jeff bezos knows me” type shit so if you’re tryna end up with someone that’s gonna possibly buy you a house, he’s your guy 

he slid into your dms after you posted a pic with your skin moisturized and glistening under golden hour and your body had him wanting to run laps 

he had been plottin on you for a min but never got the motivation to do something about it until then

he’s a no strings attached type of sugar daddy

todoroki is a big name even outside of hero work and he’s well aware of all the people that have tried to use him. so instead of letting that happen, he’s decided to do things on his own terms 

when yall first started talking, he questioned you like this was managerial position at apple 💀 

best believe he ran an in-depth background check and made you sign an NDA 💀💀💀

he was a tough one

but you passed w flying colors and y’all settled on an arrangement

you have a weekly allowance that hits your bank account every saturday with some bonuses that he’ll give you depending on how the week goes

todoroki isnt needy nor is he one to be all up in your business 

it’s actually weird in an endearing kind of way? 

he only wants to have conversations with you 

i mean, dont get me wrong, he’s up for anything you are

todoroki would be a liar if he said he never ended some nights with a picture of you and a hand down his pants 

but that’s not what he’s mainly looking for 

you figure out very quickly that shouto just wants someone to talk to 

he’ll randomly hit up your phone and have a 30 min convo about something like the weather or hero politics, and then he’ll dip

next thing you know, you got $1000 in your cashapp

you kind of panicked bc like...wtf? 

your dumb ass messaged him: “did you mean to send $1000?”

sis, dont put a question mark where God put a period

him: “Yes.”

and that was the end of that

you dont question anymore

he’s not doting in any kind of way, and sometimes you lowkey think he forgets about you, but you still get your allowance 

doesn’t send a lot of gifts unless you explicitly state you want something

he doesnt text back a lot, but he tried to respond when he can

but i do see him liking it when you send him mundane things you do throughout your day, like pics of cookies you baked, or a cool plant you saw at home depot

and he enjoys the times you and him end up just trashing his father for nearly an hour. expect to find flowers, with some expensive ass coats or something at your door the next morning 

he really fucks w your laid back vibe 

sometimes he forgets you guys arent really supposed to be friends 

Takami Kiego (Hawks):

this is not hawks’ first time being a sugar daddy

he’s hot, rich, and one of the most eligible bachelor’s in japan with a life that prevents him from having anything too serious

so, long story short, he’s a veteran at this 

he used to be the type to reach out to instagram baddies but he had a couple bad run-ins and decided to stick with the official sites because it was a lot more secure on both ends 

the funny thing was, you set up your account a long time ago as a joke. though at one point, you did take it seriously, but you came in contact with a lot of super creepy men that sexualized you for your skin and ethnicity. 

you were tired of the “chocolate king/queen” and “amazonian god/dess” comments,so you took a break. you didnt have much activity since

so imagine youre surprise when the #2 hero hit your line talking about some 

“Hey~ I’ll get straight to the point. I think you’re beautiful and I’d like to talk with you about an arrangement” 

you thought this was a fake account, but after he chatting for a little and sending some pictures, you knew he was the real deal 

hawks is your standard tit-for-tat transaction sugar daddy

he’s the type to hit you up at night with a “how ya doing, dove? got any pics for me?”

he’s good about his respect ad won’t do anything out of line

it’s the bare minimum, be he doesnt fetishize you so that’s always nice 

however, he does make you call him daddy, sir, etc. whether it’s through text, call, or when y’all get together for...reasons

ngl his dicc game is fire

he might ghost you for a week or so but he’ll always come back with a nice check to make up for it 

just be careful about catching feelings bc he’s so fucking smooth. he makes you feel like you’ve got his heart, but dont fall for that shit

if you think you can “change him” or fuflfil whatever wattpad romance fantasy lives in your head, he is not your guy. you better get on w your life before you get your heart broken

he’s here to suck, fuck, send pics, do a little phone call here n there, send some money, and go 

if you’re not with all that, you might as well dip 

but if you’re cool with that, rest assured, you’re gonna be living your best mf life with this man in your wallet 

and good news, you might not be his only, but you are his favorite

there’s just something about you that’s got him giving you a few extra thousand than he normally does 

he doesnt take his sugar babies on proper dates bc he’s gotta stay away from media outlets, but he will invite you to his office for a “lunch break”

if you ever surprise him with a cute but sexy hawks cosplay, you won’t have to work for two whole weeks bc you cant walk  

overall, he’s a good sugar daddy. defintely good for your pockets and any other non-romantic desires you want fulfilled

Mirodirya Izuku:  

the way you two met and came to this arrangement was more or less an accident

the life of the number one pro-hero was lonely and stressful 

he’s tried to dip his toes in the water here and there, but it never worked out because not many people could deal with the fact that he’d always put hero work first

he was teetering on the edge of signing up for one of those sugar daddy/baby websites until he met you at some cafe he passed by 

it’s cliche really. you were his server and, honestly? he was hooked on day one 

he watched you intently as you pranced around in your cute uniform. he couldnt stop admiring your brown skin and eyes and how cute your hair was. you spoke with such enthusiasm and cheerfulness that he couldnt help but swoon. and it didn’t hurt that you were very easy on the eyes

he listened to you as you went on a spiel about how college was a fortune and how you stayed up last night for a project bc you had to pick up extra shifts

that’s when he made his decision

by the time the hero is out of the door, you collected the reciept and almost fainted when you realized he left you a $500 tip and his personal number 

“i enjoyed talking to you today and i hope we can continue that...here’s something small to help with your bills. and i hope this isnt too forward but you’re very beautiful. stay safe. deku.”

and what did you do that night?

you called his ass right back

you were nervous as hell bc you still couldnt believe this was real, but after talking on the phone with him for two hours, an arrangement was set

midoriya is the most gentlemen like sugar daddy out there 

you wake up to good morning texts and a few hundred in your bank account almost every two days 

he goes crazy over your insta posts. and if you wear something green? expect a bonus

takes you out shopping unprovoked 

izuku: “are you busy? i saw you were having a rough week and was wondering if you wanted to go to that new outlet mall downtown”

you: 🏃🏾‍♀️💨  

you most certainly had homework due that night but what tf you look like missing out on that offer? 

it’s after so many “dates” that deku realizes that he prefers hanging around you more than he should but he doesnt wanna ruin anything so he keeps that underwraps 

he’s the idiot that goes into this thinking he won’t fall in love

deku defintely has some dirty thoughts about you but he doesnt try to bring it up unless you do first

if you’re comfortable with anything nsfw, you gone see a whole different side to izuku

he’s a giver, giver, giver, but when he recieves, he just about loses it

send him “innocent” pics of yourself matched with a string of filthy texts and he’ll combust 

when you send him pics of yourself in deku-themed lingre, he deadass sends you a whole black card with your name on it as a thank you

you guys get very comfortable with each other very quickly

soon enough, DA’s start turning into y/n stayng over for a week 

you both realize this relatiosnhip runs a lot deeper than an arrangement when he accidentally let it slip that he told his mom about you 

he’s profusely apologizing but you shut him up with a kiss and tell him that you’ve kinda caught feelings yourself 

your next conversation works out well for the both of you 

[bobbys-naughty-corner]

So I’m sitting here naked day dreaming about Bokuto because H O R N Y. So Imma write it down for y’all

Taboos

You didn’t hear the door open to your shared apartment. You didn’t hear him come up the stairs. You didn’t see him staring at you from your door way. Your towel on the floor, body sprawled out on the bed. Greased skin shining under your wired Christmas lights you hung around your room. When you moved your ass jiggled and his dick twitched at the sight. He couldn’t look away. He didn’t want to. He wanted to walk in there and take all of you for himself. Bokuto pulled out his phone and slowly crept into your bedroom. He took pictures of your ass, side boob, he was even brave enough to push your ass up and take a picture of your vagina. His hand gently rubbing your ass. Giving it a light squeeze and jiggle before he moved away. Groaning as your back rose and sunk from your heavy breathing. He left your room, closing your door quietly.

Bokuto immediately stripped his back pack, sweater and sweatpants. Crawled into his bed and palmed himself through his briefs as he swiped to every picture he took. Thinking of how warm and amazing you must feel. He couldn’t stand it. His hand fisting his cock as he imagined the feeling of your pussy around him. He came so fast, a big load just for you. His cum hitting the screen of his phone and his hand, warmly falling down his skin. The swell of his cock not going anywhere. He wasn’t satisfied. So he did it again. Panting heavily to your photos, squeezing tightly around his dick as he let drool fall out of his mouth to the tip. He dropped his phone and humped both hands. The cold air was torture to his dick. He pictured you under him, spreading your cheeks and begging him to violate you. He came again. A loud moan ripped from his throat as he sprayed his sheets with his thick semen. Out of breath pants leaving his mouth as his hips bucked every time his cum shot out. If he made a mess like this with you, would you lick it up? The thought of you licking up his cum made him hard again.

He let out and aggravated grunt as he got of of bed. Heavy foot steps heading for your room where you still slept. He entered quickly and stood over you. He stroked his dick right above your ass. You wouldn’t wake up if he touched you right? He climbed over you, straddled your legs and jerked off on your ass. What if you woke up? He can’t rape you. But he was too lost in the moment to even think about the consequences. He pulled his shirt up in his mouth and muffled his grunts. His hand rubbing your ass again. This time though instead of letting go he moved his hand lower. Right to your little core. His finger slipping between your folds, you were really wet. “Did you fuck yourself to sleep? Naughty girl.” He said to himself but aloud as if you could hear him. He wanted to feel how tight you were so his finger carefully sunk into you. Your walls hugged his finger snugly, like a gently hug. “Do you think I could fit in here?” He said aloud. His finger moving back and forth, in and out of your hole. He pumped his cock with the same grip your pussy had on his finger. “You’d fit so nicely around me.” He continued to say lewd things aloud. Maybe hoping to fill your dreams with his words and actions. “Can I put another finger in?” He asked, not bothering to wait for a reply because he wasn’t expecting one. He added another and pushed his fingers in deeper. Your walls clamping on his fingers. “Such a greedy pussy. She knows exactly how to make a dick feel good.” His fingers thrusted faster and his hips humped his hand harder. Bokuto curled his fingers and your body flinched. He twisted his wrist around to put his thumb on your clit. You tightened up and let out a moan. Bokuto watched your body stir under him. You could stop him if you wanted him to stop. So he kept going. Letting his hips fuck his hand into you while he fisted his cock. Your back arched and you gripped the sheets tightly.

“I can make you cum. Do you want that?” He asked you. You nodded your head and he chuckled. Stopping all movement over you. He got off of you and flipped you over. He pulled your hips over the edge of your bed and dropped to his knees. His eyes gazing at your twitching pussy. Spreading your lips with his thumbs and inhaling the scent your vagina let out. “Such a pretty pussy. So beautiful.” He kissed your clit and your hips jumped. Your hand grabbed his hair and pulled him forward. Looking at him wantingly, lust in your eyes with a hint of adoration. Bokuto reflects your look and smiles before using the same two fingers to enter your hole. “I would love to call this pussy mine. Can it be mine forever?” He asked against your clit. You blushed but stayed quiet. You wanted to say anything that would make him happy but you knew this was wrong. Him fingering your vagina, you letting him violate you so hungrily. I mean what could he be thinking? Wasn’t he already talking to some girl? He talked about her like he was in love. Your snapped from your thought when he kissed your clit again and gave you a whined “please.” With lustful eyes. You shuddered and nodded your head. Biting your lower lip when he smiled and suck on your clit. “Say it.” He said then starting to give your clit licks with the tip of his tongue. “This is your pussy Bokuto.” You moaned and bucked your hips. He didn’t respond, just slapped your thigh causing you to Yelp in pain. “Koutarou.” He said and licked your clit faster and finger banger you till your eyes rolled back. Your neck hanging back as your vision turned white. Your hips rolled on his mouth and you let out a groan as you bit your lip so much you left deep marks and a tingling numbing pain. He kept his mouth on you until you actually cried for him to stop.

“You taste so good. How about you taste me.” He let your body slide to the floor as he stood up. Your bottom lips swollen from sucking and biting on it. “Come on open up,” he pressed his tip on your lips and you opened your mouth wider. His cock tasted like sour, tart, spit. And you loved it. Your hands laid flat again this pelvis as your head bobbed up and down his dick. Sloppily slurping, gagging and moving your head around. His eyes widened as he stared down at you. His left hand on your curly hair and his right hand holding up his shirt as he fucked your mouth. “Ohmygodohmygodohmygod! Fuck! Your so hot!” He thrusted faster and even gagged you to where your snot came out of your nose. He called you a nasty, slutty roommate. Your hands massaging his balls, tired of them slapping your chin. “Oh yeah. I want you to swallow my cum. Drink my cum baby.” He pubes hitting your nose as his hips abused your mouth. Jabbing the back of your throat mercilessly. His hips stuttered as he came down your throat forcing you to swallow even if you didn’t. You didn’t mind though. You wanted to taste him. You are upset you missed that part, wanting to feel him cum on your tongue as your taste buds savored his arousing flavor. With the last thrust of his hips he pulled out and panted. Hand still in your hair, cock bouncing in your face and you pumped him as he tried to catch his breath. You got up and he kissed you. Shoving his tongue in your mouth and pressing your body against his with one hand and the other pushed down his briefs.

“You want more?” He asked looking down at you. You nodded slightly and he grinned. “You want your roommate to fuck you?” You nodded again. “That’s not how you say it.” He said into your ear. You gasped lightly before backing up. You sat on your bed and scooted back before spreading your legs for him. “Please, please fuck my pussy. I need you.” You begged seductively. Bokuto lunged at you and eagerly slapped your clit with his dick. Grinding your nub a couple of times before lining up at your hole. “So wet, so hot, just for me. Tell me when I get too rough.” He looked at you and waited for your approval. You nodded your head and moaned out when he put the tip in. “You sound so beautiful.” He commented as he pushed himself in more.

Squealing when at your walls stretched to fit his girthy cock. You weren’t a virgin but he was not the same size as the others you’ve been with. You knew he was big, the moment he was in your mouth all you could think about is the stretch he would give you. The pain you wanted. You wanted him to show possession over you, obsession for you, lust and love for you. If you had to share so be it but as long as he made you feel good. “What you thinking about baby?” Your head snapped up at the nickname. “Baby?” You questioned. Couples called each other that. “Baby. Do you wish to be my slutty roommate instead? I much prefer the thought of you as my girlfriend.” He said. Your eyes widened. ‘What was he talking about? And why now?’ “What about-“ he cut you off with a thrust. “You’re mine, right YN? You’re my baby and this is my pussy. You’d give it to me whenever I ask? Right?” He questioned as he thrust into you. You moaned out at the pleasure his dick brought you. Your cum and arousal making a mess between the two of you. “Too good? Cant say anything? Well since you’re my girl it’s only right I give you the best. The best dick of your life soon the best life. Now rub that little clit and keep moaning for me.” His thrust were slow. He was enjoying your embrace and appreciating your body. Permanently storing photos in his mind. Admiring the way your titties bounced and how your broken moans sounded like beautiful music. You felt better than he imagined. Better than his hands. “I want to fuck this pussy everyday. I want to make you sing my name every morning. Come to me.” He leaned over you and you lifted your body up on your arms meeting him halfway. Kissing each other messily, swapping saliva. You held your head back and hung your mouth open letting him spit in your mouth and you moaned at his saliva. Swallowing it and showing him your clean tongue. Bokuto grunted and dipped his head. “Hold on.” His thrust got faster and harder. You cling to his back as he pounded you into the bed. “Koutarou~! Koutarou~!” You yelled. His cock dragging in and out of your slick walls, hips making sticky wet noises as they slapped against yours and your fingers circling your little clit just like he ask.

“Good girl. Such a good girl. Daddy wants you to cum.” Your brain malfunctioned at his praise. ‘I’m his good girl.’ You repeated to yourself. Watching him from hooded eyes, in love with the man above you. Your walls clamping around him as your orgasm was approaching. Bokuto stared at you, watching your fucked out face. You were so beautiful to him. His head dipped to your breast and sucked your nipples. Your body slumped as your orgasm hit. Hips bucking and body fighting him as he fucked you through it. “There we go. Fuck! I’m close!” He sat up and pushed your knees beside your head. He used his knees to bounce and he hunched over you and got really rough. Beautiful pain flashing through your body. Strangled grunts coming from your clenched teeth as he made it hard to breathe in your position. You crossed your eyes when his thumb brushed your clit. “So sensitive.” He commented. He did it on purpose and was happy he did, he got to see such an erotic look from you. He rubbed your clit up and down and you screamed. It was too much for you. “Kou!!” He pulled out at the scream of his name. Fucking his hand, giving you a break.

His cum landed all over you. His thick heavy load painting your body as you panted and shivered from the previous orgasm. “One more time.” He said. You were completely satisfied and overly used so you didn’t say anything. He laid next to you and pushed you onto your side. He lifted your leg and pushed into your pussy. You moaned lightly. Your spongy walls nearly gave him a hard time. He picked up where he left off and you squirmed. Bokuto covered your mouth as you screamed into his hand. His dick angled to hit your g spot. Your walls squeezed and released and he knew he was hitting something in you. “You like that? Right here?” He hit the same spot again and again. “That’s right cum on Daddy’s cock.” Your eyes rolled back at his word. It felt so amazing to release again. His hips stopped and he came too. “Fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck! I’m sorry.” He said as his cum filled your womb. He thrusted again letting all of his load fill you. He was already doing it, why stop. Tears trinkled from your eyes as his cock pushed against your cervix, trying to push deeper. You shut your eyes and waited for him to pull out. Bokuto kissed your shoulder let your leg down gently. He rolled you over and pulled out. His cum dribbling out of you, bubbling at your hole and leaking on the sheets. The come on the front of your body now absorbed in the sheets too. You felt so worn out.

Bokuto plopped beside you and rubbed circles on your back. “You’re now mine for good.” He laughed. “I’ll buy you plan b later.” He kissed your floppy hand and fell asleep beside you.

[babyspiderling]

Curiosity Killed the Cat Corpse x Reader

Ok, so first time doing a corpse. Yes, I gave Corpse a name, but it’s only used once and none of us know his government name. If I’m right tho Imma loose my fucking shit.

“Well, what's the worst that could happen? I’m just looking for a new roommate and this seems like the best option.” I take a deep breath and adjust my rings as I lock my car behind me. My hands tremor slightly as they raise to knock on the typical San Francisco apartment door. My fist hesitates for a mere second before the door opens seemingly by itself. I lock eyes with hazel behind a mess of curls. “H-hi! I’m Y/N. I’m here for the roommate ad?” He nods a bit and turns and goes back into his apartment, leaving the door open for me to enter. I shut the door behind me and fidget with my fingers. “Do, uh, do you prefer me to take my shoes off or leave them on?” He shrugs a bit, moving into the kitchen. “I don’t have a preference.” Even with those five words his deep voice sends a shiver down my spine. I toe off my sneakers one shoe at a time and timidly follow after him, tugging my sleeves down over my hands to make myself seem smaller. “So, uh, tell me about yourself. Whatever you want to share of course.” He pulls two mugs down on the counter and turns on the kettle. “Tea?” I nod my head and fiddle with my sleeves. I can feel his gaze on me as I carefully scrutinize the floor below me. “Hey, you don’t have to be scared of me. I promise I’m not a serial killer.” I nod but don’t change my posture. “I understand, but you’re just really intimidating. With the height difference and the deep voice and your aura. It’s not dangerous, but it's like, it's like, oh! It’s like that one scene in Beauty and the Beast when Belle is in the place she isn’t meant to be and she’s all hesitant about touching the painting and the rose and stuff.” His dark eyebrows furrow together at my strange comparison. “Weird way to put it I know, but it’s the only way I can think to word it.” He nods and opens up a cabinet. “What tea would you like?” I scan the shelves and pick a flavor. “Oh, um, peppermint if you don’t mind.” He nods and dips the bag into the hot water. “So, I guess this is where we introduce ourselves? I’m Y/N, and I work as a waitress down the road.” I look at him expectantly and wait for him to introduce himself. “Oh uh, my name is Matt, and I’m not a serial killer.” We vibe for another couple hours until he looks at me and decides I’m a good enough candidate for being his roommate. 

It wasn’t too hard to be his roommate, all I had to do was pay my share of the rent on time, clean up after myself and go out to get the groceries using the grocery pot of money. There was one rule that was strange and constantly reminded me of the remark I made the day we met. “Under no circumstance can you go into that room. It isn’t dangerous, but I just don’t want you in there.” I understood the rule and refused to let the curious little cat inside me destroy the good thing I had going here. That was until I couldn’t find the printer.

My roommate of almost a year had gone out for an appointment and I was working on some things for college while he was gone. I had finally finished my paper and needed to print a copy for annotations as well as submit it online before class in an hour. I connected to the printer and started the process of printing out my assignment. I searched the apartment high and low, listening for the hum it provided. Staying completely silent, barely breathing, I heard the whir behind the door I was never to enter. “You could shoot him a text to ask if you could pop in, grab your paper, and get out. Or you could print it at the library. Or you could just go in, grab the stuff and get out, you were never here.” I felt the pressure of the equally bad and unwanted options and just decided to pop in and out to grab my things and never mention it to him. I stole a breath and entered the room. It wasn’t strange or concerning in any way possible. It was just an office with a desk and a computer and all that. I scurried to the printer and picked up the papers as they were spit out, warm and smelling of ink and toner. There were only a few pages left when something glinting in the light caught my eye. It’s silver color drew me in and I made the connection that on his wall was a silver and gold youtube play button with the name “Corpse Husband” on it. My brows furrowed in confusion. I had heard bits and pieces about this guy named “Corpse” who never showed his face and had a crazy deep voice. Why did my roommate have play buttons with his name on them? The pinter sat forgotten as I attempted to put any of the pieces together. In my racing thoughts, I failed to hear both the front door and the footfalls up to the open door to my left. “I told you not to come in here! I gave you one rule. I didn’t make you pay that much rent, and I didn’t ask anything of you besides to respect my privacy and boundaries enough to stay away from here.” His hand raked through his curls, tugging at them harshly. “Did you know?” My mouth had since gone dry and my brain had crashed. He stalked me, his steps menacing and ferocious. “Did you know?” I shook my head, trying to turn the gears. “Know what? I don’t understand. I’m sorry I disobeyed you, but I needed to use the printer, I thought it would be an in and out. I didn’t think-” My roommate, “Corpse” sneered, his teeth gnashing at the bit. “No! You didn’t think! You didn’t think about how this would make me feel! You didn’t think about how you could hurt me like this! You didn’t think of anyone or anything but yourself!” My eyes watered and I bit back a sob. “I’m sorry! I’ll just go. It's not like you really need the help paying the rent anyways. I’ll be back eventually to pick up my things. And I won’t tell anyone. I swear. I’ll even sign an NDA if that’ll make you happy.” I grabbed my essay and rushed out of the room, out of the apartment, out of his life until further notice. 

[diavolosthots]

Hello, lovely writer 💙 If you like, might you please write a scene of mc x satan having a movie night? Just lots of cuddles, kissing and fluff. 🥰 Thank you thank you, darling, and please don’t feel any pressure to write this if it doesn’t spark anything 💙 Happy holidays! 🥰 And thank you!

***REQUESTS ARE NOT OPEN THIS IS FROM LAST TIME***

imma be real this idea was sparked by my friend who said she never watched HP/Marvel/Star Wars/LOTR/any other major movie franchise... Lol

Uneducated (SATAN X GN!READER)

For someone who’s so intelligent he’s actually pretty uneducated. How could he miss the major franchises of the past like… 50 years?! What good does it do you when you’re alive for literally ever and you don’t even know the basics like Harry Potter and Star wars?! Especially Harry Potter… he calls himself a bookworm, a nerd, and has never even read the books. Unbelievable. You still stared at him in disbelief days later. Star Wars? You might excuse, he doesn’t really seem to be the Star Wars type… but he should’ve at least heard of it! You figured he must at least watch one of the franchises, and if he hates it after the first movie… you may be somewhat more accepting. “I read the books.” He held up all seven Harry Potter books, smiling proudly, “in just a couple of days, to prepare for our movie marathon. I was debating on if I should go in blindsided but I figured the movies didn’t do the books justice so… I took it upon myself to read them.” Of course he would do so. “Well… you’re not wrong. How did you like them?” 

He liked them, a lot. You had to sit through a whole three hour presentation of why he believes Snape is treated unfairly and Draco is misunderstood; however, his favorites were actually the twins, Fred and George Weasley, “they should’ve been there a lot more. The true backbones of the books and, presumably, the movies.” Well, you wouldn’t go that far but you let him believe that. “Alright… well, sit.” You patted the spot beside you, thankful that Satan managed to hide a T.V. in his room where he watched all the shows he usually does. You pulled some pillows onto the floor, pushing some of the books aside that will probably never find a proper home on any of the shelves. “I think… hm.. You might like the movies for visual reasons.” “Please, (Y/N). I already drew out everything in my head as I read the books. If it’s not like I imagined, the movies will be thrown out.” You bit your tongue, not wanting to be quite so obvious in the fact that the movies should’ve been thrown out, anyway. 

It didn’t take long for him to start arguing about how the movies do a terrible representation of the books and… it was more amusing than anything. Admittedly, you shouldn’t have laughed as much as you did, but it was just so funny to see him get all riled up, all angry and then letting it out toward the screen, “Satan! Hey! I know… sshh… calm down…” you were still laughing when you managed to cradle him in your arms, not really keeping him there with much strength, but you at least wanted him to stop yelling at the screen. He fake struggled, whining a bit more against you, “(Y/N)... These movies are distasteful! We’re only two movies in and… what happened to Arthur punching Lucius!? I was looking forward to it…!” He let himself be pulled into your lap, letting your arms push his face into your chest as he pouted. Of course, he wasn’t upset about it, but he does like being babied by you because you do it so well. Plus, you were comfortable and he’d be a fool to pretend anything else. 

“Yeah? Just wait when you see what happened in the Marvel movies vs. the comic books.” He shakes his head, lifting it up from your chest to look at you, a small smirk gracing his lips before he pushes you down onto your back, letting himself fall on top of you, “You’re trying to get me even more riled up, aren’t you? Is that your goal? Speak, (Y/N). I need to know.” A smirk of your own matched his, your hands sneaking up to run through his hair, “hm… maybe? I just like it when you get close.” A teasing roll of his hips against yours, although it stopped immediately after, his head dropping down onto your chest again. As a matter of fact, his whole body dropped onto you and you grunted a little at the added weight, “oof! S-Satan… you’re heavy..!” “are you calling me fat? You need to apologize.” He’s just messing around of course, “Apologize…? Satan get off!” But he didn’t even budge, just looking back down at you, “kiss me and I might.” 

You rolled your eyes, laughing again because he’s being so extra and… a little needy. Sometimes he had these random moments where he wants to be like every couple on T.V.; dorky, cute, rolling around on the floor for seemingly no reason. “Fine, one kiss,” and you couldn’t help but oblige to his wishes. His head slowly dipped down and you grabbed it with your hands, kissing his lips repeatedly as a laugh escaped him. You matched it, giggling from your own actions before pampering his whole face with kisses, “muah! There. Was that enough?” He seemed to be in thought, smiling down at you. A soft pink was caressing his cheeks and he quickly rolled over, taking you with him so that you landed up on top instead, “hm… almost. Come here, kitten.” His arms wrapped around you tightly, squeezing you against him and you swore you heard your back crack, “T-Too tight… Satan… can’t breathe…” “Good. the less you can breathe the less you can squirm. I’ll make you my perfect little cuddle buddy.” Was that a death threat? Wide eyes looked up at him, but he only laughed loudly, his head falling back in amusement. 

“Are you trying to kill me?!” He was still laughing, unwrapping his arms from around you to cover his face. His whole body was shaking beneath you and you frowned, tickling his sides because you might as well have fun with it, but the beautiful sound of his voice laughing abruptly stopped when he took his hands in yours, rolling you back over and looking down at you with a stern face, “... only with love.” His eyes were sparkling with mischief, a smug smirk gracing his lips now and before you knew it, his own hands were tickling you instead; his kind of love. At least he wasn't ranting about Harry Potter anymore.

[echo-hiraeth]

Vanity - Jack “Whiskey” Daniels x F!Reader

Summary: Part of the Ikea series. Being a Statesman means that Jack has traveled a bunch, and during one of his particular trips he picks up on an idea to modify your own shared bedroom.

Warnings: cussing, spice, nsfw stuff, just 18+

Masterlist

As he stood there, slightly panting and rolling his whip back up, Jack smiled to himself. Knowing he had a missus to come home to nowadays made it all the more exciting. Jack hadn’t thought himself to be lucky enough to meet someone ever again but yet he met you. The two of you had been dating for about three years now and Jack had popped the big question a couple weeks ago, right before he left for his next mission. That mission had come to an end today and the poor ole’ cowboy couldn’t way to have you in his arms again.

“Holy shit”, Tequila panted as he walked into the bedroom.

Jack grinned as he followed the young man’s gaze, which was trained on the ceiling, more precisely what was on the ceiling. “Imma need me one of those.”

“You think your lady would be okay with you looking at yourself all the time?”, the younger Statesman taunted.

“Oh imma be looking at her boy.”

Jack knew your working hours by heart and was aware of the fact that he’d be home before you. So when he finally arrived back in town,he headed to the nearest furniture store, the “big blue and yellow one” as he liked to call it. He spent a good hour trying to find the perfect mirrors and another good hour in the cafeteria. He even picked up some of those smell-candle thingies you loved so much.

Once home he headed straight to the bedroom, but not before picking up the tool-belt you’d gifted him for Christmas last year. He knew how much you liked that thing and had every intention of driving you crazy as soon as you set foot through that door. He had a little less than two hours left before you’d come home so he had to make it quick. 

Being the stubborn man that he was, Jack had set his mind on doing this all by himself. A decision which he soon regretted, his neck absolutely straining at the angle with which he stared at the ceiling, slowly drilling some holes. There was also the aspect of gravity, you know, heavy mirror on a ceiling, it wasn’t the easiest job, but he eventually managed with about half an hour to spare.

He used that half hour to freshen up, poor out some drinks and light those candles. Just as he placed the bottle of champagne back in the fridge, he heard your key turning in the lock. You didn’t even notice him at first, earbuds pressed in your ears and shoulders slumped in exhaustion. But as soon as you yanked the darn things out of your ears you were met with a husky “welcome home sugar”.

You ran up to him, launching yourself into his arms, exhaustion gone within seconds. He stumbled back a little bit, your enthusiasm having a bigger impact than you’d anticipated. He smiled down at you before pressing his lips to yours, expressing his need for you in a hungry kiss.

“I missed you so much”, you whimpered against his lips, hands clinging to the collar of his shirt.

He moved his hands to the curve of your hips, lifting you off the ground and pressing you to his body. “Let me make it up to you, doll.”

The trip to the bedroom was one full of needy, woeful sighs and lingering touches. And in between whispered words of adoration and longing he found himself bumping into the bed, softly setting you down. You move back on the bed, propping yourself up against the decorative pillows as you fiancé unbuttons his shirt. He soon crawled back on top of you, and that’s when you saw it - yourself, well a reflection of. As he kissed down your neck, sucking and biting, you quirked a brow at yourself in the mirror.

“Honey”, he stopped his movements, looking up at you with a tinge of concern, “what the hell did you do to the ceiling?”

He huffed out a hot breath, flipping the both of you over to where you were straddling his hips. “I want to see you”, he purred.

You would be lying if you said that didn’t turn you on. He lifted your shirt over your head, revealing a more than gorgeous, lacy bralette. Jack let out a guttural groan as he cupped your soft breasts through the arousing material. You put your hands over his as you let out a sweet moan. He proceeded to bring your left hand to his mouth, pressing his lips to the ring, it was an intimate gesture, and his tongue swirling around the band drove you absolutely insane. You lunged forwards, pinning both of his hands down beside his head. 

“Agent Whiskey, shouldn’t you consult your wife before making such rash decisions?”, you tutted, moving your hips just the slightest bit.

His lips quirked up in a teasing grin as he looked at you, slowly and lowly saying: “I’m sure she’d approve.. but a fiancée..”

You hummed a bit as you trailed the tips of your fingers down his chest. “Guess you’ll have to convince her then, cowboy.”

He didn’t need to hear you say it twice, quickly wrapping his arms around you once again as he rolled you over. You groaned as your back hit the mattress, his hot mouth locking onto your breasts almost immediately. Somewhere along the way he’s managed to unclasp the back of it, allowing him to drag the piece of lace down even further, granting him full, unapologetic access to your chest. 

"I want you to see how gorgeous you look when I play with that pretty little pussy of yours", he grumbled, ripping your panties off of you.

You let out a whine at this, hands tangling in his slicked back hair, roughing it up. "Please baby.. touch me", you begged, numb with anticipation.

He dipped a set of fingers into your mouth, which you obediently licked and sucked on, then he proceeded to retract them, only to let them work their magic on your heat.

When the pad of his thumb brushed against your clit you nearly screamed. The teasing and lack of touching made you more sensitive than you'd ever been. He muffled your moans and mewls by dipping his tongue into your mouth.

You bit down on his bottom lip as he slipped the two fingers inside of you, hands moving to his bare back. As he expertly curled and twisted his fingers you scratched away at the skin between his shoulder blades. You had to admit that looking up and seeing the writing mess that you were has something ecstatic about it. You could feel Jack grinning against the skin of your neck as he softly nipped you there, taunting you. Even his movements inside of you were teasing, the slow pace absolutely torturous.

But there was only so much you could take before pushing him away and crawling on top of him. Your fingers worked frantically on his belt, the urgency to have him inside you, pulsing and stretching the only thing on your mind. You didn't even bother to discard the jeans he was wearing, you just dragged them down his thighs, enough for you to pull his hardened cock out of his briefs.

"My beautiful girl", Jack croaked out as he caressed the underside of your left breast.

The affirmation made you even more eager and soon you lowered yourself onto him in a beautiful symphony of moans and praises. The familiar feeling of his member stretching you lower half out was much needed and you didn’t even realise how much you missed it until that very moment.

His head was thrown back against the pillow gaze trained on the ceiling as he watched you rock your hips back and forth. Just the sight alone would be enough to cum, well that and the lack of sex due to his mission. He roughly started circling your clit, making you moan out his name as you held on to your own breasts.

The way your mouth hung open and eyes were screwed shot was fucking hot and he couldn’t help himself when he started bucking his hips, meeting yours with each new thrust.

“Fuck baby, I’m close”, he panted.

You braced your hands on his chest as you kissed his swollen lips. “Me too.”

It was then, in the height of his pleasure as he released within you, that Jack noticed something, something was off. Within mere seconds he rolled the two of you off the bed, bracing you with his body as the mirror fell from the ceiling, shattering apart on the bed.

You let out a yelp of surprise as your backside hit the wooden floors with a painful thud. With his cock still sheathed within your warmth Jack looked over to check for injuries. When he noticed you were fine he gave a small chuckle.

“I don’t think my lady would approve of this.”

It was safe to say that ceiling mirrors were a no-go from there on out. And the four holes in the ceiling were filled up the next day, which gave you a perfect excuse to finally paint the room a new colour. It was a win-win, Jack got to fulfill his visual fantasies and you finally got rid of the boring brown colour in the bedroom.

[n0wornever]

I Fly - Luke Patterson x Reader

Luke x reader fic where they go on an ice skating date? I love all of your work!

Thank you bby! This was fun, thank you for the request! (Song Lyrics at the end: You’re Gonna Live Forever in Me by John Mayer)

Luke held his hands over her eyes, her warm breath hitting his knuckles as he ushered her forward.

“Lucas Patterson, where the heck are you taking me?” 

He leaned down, pressing his lips down to her ear. “Almost there baby, I promise,” a grin peeling back to his cheeks. 

He heard her sigh as she trudged forward on the slippery winter sidewalk. After a few more steps, Luke halted and uncovered her eyes. As she fog was lifted, she held back the urge to jump up in joy. She looked around the rink, the freshly packed ice was smooth as far as her eyes could see, and the air held quiet around the arena. 

“You did not,” She turned back to him and wrapped her arms around his neck. “You told me you’d never go skating again...after last time.” She poked his chest with her finger.

The boy’s cheeks began to fade from their normal pale complexion as he looked down at her. His hands slid around her waist, pulling her closer to him. She watched as his breath created a cloud in front of her as he sighed deeply. 

“I thought we agreed to never talk about that again,” He whined, pouting. 

Y/N’s lips curled into a smirk as she was reminded of the one other hour that Luke had let her pull him across the ice.

His eyes were wide before his skates even hit the pavement, and when they made their way to the gate, his grip threatened to turn her hand purple. 

As she let go of his hand, he wobbled from left to right. She looked back at him for a moment, a light smile on her face as she watched him crawl at a sluggish pace toward her. She spun back around and caught wind of the crowd in front of her, pushing her forward quickly. They lasted about 5 more minutes before Luke hit the ice. 

She heard him scream and whipped around, leaving a deep cut in the sludge below her. Her eyes softened as she watched her boyfriend hold his elbow as he winced in pain on the ground. Her skates made quick movements, ducking an diving with her, as she cut through oncoming traffic to get back to him. As her skates came to a halt at his feet, he looked up at her. His lip popping out in a pout with his eyes wide. 

“Baby, can we go? I know people are looking at me...”

She looked around and saw families and couples around her minding their business and sighed. She knew that he was embarrassed and although she wanted to encourage him to try again, the look in his eyes screamed that the fight would be more work than icing his bruised ego. She held her hand out for him and helped him back onto his feet. She curled his arm around his, leaning up to kiss his cheek before escorting him to the soft carpeted lobby. 

She was pulled back to the present by a squeeze of her hand from the left side. Luke looked at her with a questioning gaze and she leaned into him. 

“Why the change of heart?” 

Luke chuckled, bringing her knuckles up to his lips and pressing a quick kiss to the skin. He looked back out at the silent slate of glass and let a small smile grace his lips.

“I know you miss it so much,” He said cooly, monitoring her bright smile. “Plus, Alex’s dad runs this arena and he said we could have the place to ourselves for a few hours before they open.” 

Y/N nodded “So you don’t have a crowd to panic about?” She questioned, batting her eyelashes at him.

“You’re making me regret this decision...”

Her sly smirk dropped as she clasped his hand and ran to the front desk. Two pairs of skates sat atop the counter with a small note that had his name on it. She grinned, grabbing the smaller white skates and rushing toward the nearest bench. She heard him laugh as she sped past him, sauntering over next to her in his own time. 

She flipped her curly hair to the side as she laced up the right skate. Something about the way her hands manuevered the laces through the holes brought her back to her competing days. In seconds she was transported inches of the ground in a butterfly spin with a smile on her face, glitter atop her cheek. She tied the bow tight and repeated the motions on the other skate, tapping both feet in excitement as she finished. 

As she moved to meet his gaze again, she noticed his timid eyes fixed on the ice. She quickly grabbed his hand, pulling his focus back to her with a forced smile. She shook her head, pressing her palm tightly against his before letting go. 

“Baby, you got this. Come on,” She cheered, standing to her feet and holding her hand out toward him.

He exhaled loudly before grabbing her hand, forcibly pulled to a standing position by her grip. Her happy eyes made it impossible for him not to mimick the emotion they held as she inched them forward toward the opening of the rink. 

She let go of him for a moment and stepped onto the cold surface first, testing the waters. As she steadied herself, she reached out for him again. He took a deep breath before connecting their hands again and pressing his skates to the ice. She maintained eye contact as the boy struggled to keep his balance for a moment, watching as his hips wandered side to side.

“Try to keep your weight evenly distributed,” She soothed him by rubbing her thumb up and down his hand as she watched him bite down on his lower lip. After a moment of frustration, his stance calmed and he stood straight in front of her. 

“Ready to move?” She questioned, toe pointing toward the middle of the rink. 

He didn’t speak, but nodded quickly. He added a bit of pressure to his grip as she turned around and pulled him slightly forward. His eyes moved to her feet, watching her movements carefully as he tried to recreate them. The first few steps came out shaky, and his nerves hit as his arm caused her to waver to the side, but she quickly regained her balance every time. 

She stopped them for a moment, and he focused on the back of her head. She moved slowly, turning her body toward him. He looked at her deep eyes in confusion as she grabbed his other hand.

“I’m going to skate backwards so that you don’t have to stare at my hair for an hour,” She giggled, pressing off on her right skate. 

“Good,” A smile grew across his face as he tried to maintain his balance. “I missed those eyes anyway.” 

He looked proudly at the pink dusting her cheeks, and took claim of that blush that had risen from her body away from the chilling temperture of the building. She rolled her eyes as her legs glided across the think layer of ice. As they rounded the corner, she felt him tense under her touch. 

“Focus on my feet again honey.” 

He nodded, letting his gaze dip down, watching her movements. As they arrived on the other side, she felt his grip begin to loosen on hers. She smiled as his brows finally relaxed on his face and he was able to move forward with his eyes on her in ease. Her smiled widened so that it reached her nose, scrunching it in its path upward. She let her thumbs graze his skin again, and she sent a wink his way. 

“An ole pro in no time,” She joked, earning a chuckle from her boyfriend. 

After a few times around the rink, he squeezed her hands and nodded his head to the right. 

“Come stand next to me?” He questioned, and her eyebrows raised. 

“You’re okay with that?” 

He nodded quickly and the pair paused for a moment to readjust on the ice. She let her arm link around his as they moved forward together. She let her gaze press into his side profile as a small smile grew on his lips. She leaned her head softly against him for a second before facing forward again. 

The pair moved in silence for a few more moments before Y/N pulled him toward the entrance once again. She heard him softly call out her name behind her, but she pushed them forward without another word. As they approached the gate, she let go of his hand and he automatically latched onto the frame.

“Are you okay honey?” He asked, looking over to her, his worry line deepening in his forehead. 

“Yeah, I just felt like we were missing something.” 

She pulled out a small white case from her pocket, opening it to find two small earbuds. She placed one in her ear, then quickly skating to his side to place one in his. She hid the packaging away and pulled out her phone. She pressed on the Spotify app and scrolled through her playlists. She pressed down on one that had the initials LP with a guitar emoji next to it and hit shuffle. Luke’s smile rose again as the first note hit his eardrum.

“Our song,” He said just above a whisper, his eyes meeting hers again.

She nodded, placing her phone in her back pocket. She reached out her hand for his again, and he happily placed it in softly, intertwining their fingers. She pushed forward, and he released his grip on the gate. The pair slid onto the ice swiftly. 

“Parts of me were made by you, and planets keep their distance too. The moon's got a grip on the sea, and you're gonna live forever in me. I guarantee, it's your destiny.”

The sweet lyrics hummed in both of their ears as they met eyes again. She lifted his hand to hers and kissed the top quickly before dropping their embrace to her side again. She moved closer to him as their bodies swayed in sync around the circle once more. 

.

.

.

Tag list: @xplrreylo​​ @lovesanimals​​ , @anythingandeverythingfandom​​ , @crybabyddl​​ , @oswin05​​ , @themaddies-obx​​ , @lukeys-giggle​​ , @bumbleberry-pie​​ @kiss-themoongoodbye​​  @marinettepotterandplagg​​ , @lolychu​​ , @bathtimejish​​ , @dasexydevitt13​​ @musicconversedance​​ , @txrii​​  @bestdressedandstressed​​ @daisiesforlacey​  @epikskool​​  @bookfrog247​​ @carleywhittaker​​ @princessvader15​​ @rudysbay​​ @spooky-season-bitch​​  @kcd15​​  @meangirlsx​​ @itz-jas​​ @parkeret​​ @writerinlearning​​ @calamitykaty​​ ​ @whatever-happens-imma-stand-tall​

[ahoge-fish]

👾 and ☔ for jotaro x alex

👾: Talk a little about your F/O’s source! What is it about? What do you like about it?

Sooooo, basically everything I said in this post HAHAHAHAH But yeah to keep it short, about Jotaro I- *hem hem* W E (me and Alex) really like his personality. I mean, I'm so weak for those characters that act cold but they in reality care deeply for the ones they love :'') But I think that he's also my favourite because in expressing appreciation we are similar. On the internet I try to express it through words, since I can't express it through actions ;v; (I try my best, I'm not the best with words since most of the time I can't explain myself well HAHAHA), but in real life I'm sooo much different. I mean, I still express my appreciation to others, but with little and constant actions. I see that your bottle of water is empty? Imma take it and fill it up for you. You're hungry? Imma share my food with you. Oh look your shoelace is loose, let me help you with it and other little actions ;v; I really can't do it with words in real life HAHAHAH So yeah, this similar trait is one of the reasons I like him :) Oh and I also really admire his courage, I mean the teen has balls to go to a deadly trip at 17 years old, AND ALL OF THAT BECAUSE HE LOVES HIS MOTHER OMG HE'S SUCH A TSUNDERE I LOVE HIM SO MUCH- 💖💖💖💖💖💖

☔️: What do the two of you do during rainy days?

It depends on how heavy it's the rain and if it's pretty warm or cold outside.

If it's heavy and cold outside, then they stay inside and do their normal things. But they also like sitting in front of the window listening to the raindrops hitting the glass while cuddling 😌.

Jotaro and Alex, before and after having kids, also still do those races with the raindrops. They bet on silly things: the one who loses washes the dishes, has to stay still while the winner tickles the loser, has to mop the floor and blah blah blah XD. Same goes for the kids: they all do this race and always bet on silly things! They usually divide themselfs in 2 squads though.

"Hah! Looks like daddy and Luis have to do the laundry~"

"But Jolyne cheated! She changed raindrop at the last second!"

"That's not true! It was daddy who did it!"

"Mine still didn't move."

"At least you're honest, honey. Come on, boys! Time to work for you two!"

"Mommy we're INVINCIBLE!"

"Daaad, I told you at the beginning not to pick that raindrop!"

"Come on, Luis. We're going to have a lot of fun at the spinny world."

"WAIT! I want to know what the spinny world is!"

"Then you should come with us, Jolyne."

"Jotaro! Don't corrupt our daughter!"

If it's light but still pretty warm outside, (so those summer rainy days, or that period after summer when the weather is not so cold) they like to stay under it and enjoy their time together, by playing with each other or just standing there in a comfortable silence. When they started living together, they also went swimming at the beach in days like this. I mean, the water is also warmer while raining! (I did swam at the beach while it was raining, and me and my family went into the water cuz in fact it was warmer than being outside of it XD)

When they decide to do this they go skinny dipping. Since there's no one at the beach during a rainy day, nobody can see their naked butts HAHAHAH, but if there are people they just go with their costumes. With kids they do it normally, so everyone wears a costume.

Always during days with light rain, but this time when the weather is more chilly, (so it's fall season) they go outside with raincoats and enjoy their time together. They walk slowly while Alex has her arms wrapped around one of Jotaro's, and then they usually go to bars to eat something and rest. With kids, they do the same and they also let them play and jump in puddles. The couple prefers when they play in water puddles, but it happens that the kids also play in mud puddles. They're very messy with them: they throw at themselfs mudballs and sometimes even launch themselfs in them to see who slips farther (they do the last one also in water puddles) But hey, they can always shower after that! The problem is getting into the house with their dirty boots and dripping raincoats with mud. And let's be honest here, they also did the same while they were kids and also teenagers ;)

[notspazztrapavacado]

'Flu-shot Fiasco'

Dr. Clef x they/them! scp! reader

(This AU belongs to supercasey, I'm hoping I'm understanding it right)

It had been nearly twenty-two years they'd been stuck in this place, saved from the streets as a young teen the first time they had died. Nothing was really special about them save for the fact they regenerated at a supernatural rate and was not stopped from it by death, but it was worth noting that every time they'd been put with a family, the general lack of self preservation made them too weak stomache to keep them and gave them back. 

It's not all bad, though, this place was kind to them. It was like an animal rescue center and a hospital and an orphanage had some kind of weird hybrid child center. Simply put: It was home. 

Right now, however, they were clinging to the ceiling fan in their basic human enclosure for dear life, dread pooling in the pit of their stomach as the small team of researchers beneath them looked on.

"(Y/N) it's time for your flu shot." Kondraki was not having this at all, not today. 

"No! Do what you with me, put me through a meat grinder, dip me in acid, but do not come anywhere NEAR me with a needle!" They shouted down at them and he sighed, facepalming as he heard the answer he'd gotten every year.

"I expected better of you." Gears sighed and Iceberg crossed his arms.

"You're 34, can't you act like it once?" Iceberg huffed his point in this.

"Technically, I'm 25." They noted the age they stopped at, regeneration covering the loss of cells and giving them the look of a much younger individual. 

"Still an adult. Now get down." Iceberg argued. (Y/n) only scrunched up their nose at him and stuck their tongue out.

"Bright. You're up." Kondraki motioned to Dr. Bright, who looked very pleased he got the chance to do what he wanted here.

"Haha, watch this." He strode over to the doorway and flipped one of the two switches next to it, powering the fan on with success. 

(Y/n) remained attached to it, spinning at an increasingly rapid pace until the motion leveled out. They looked on with a mix of amusement and utter disappointment.

"Have you practiced this??" Gears squinted, baffled, but not surprised.

"Only every day of my life!" they cackle maniacally. This was the year they finally won. No shots for (Y/n)!!

"I didn't want to have to do this." Kondraki picked up his walkie-talkie, and Bright flipped the switch for the fan, watching it come to a stop with a certain amount of respect for the art of chaos.

"You won't be reasoned with, you won't be bested, we must resort to cheating." Dr. Bright gave his speech, lips pressed into a firm line in standing his ground. 

"You're not my dad!" They shouted at him.

"I'm old enough to be!" he shouted back.

"Clef, (Y/n) is stuck to the ceiling this year." Kondraki spoke into the small, boxy device. It gave a distorted, sharp sound.

"Got tired of the kitchen table gambit?" Clef's voice came through almost clearly.

"We took the handcuffs away last week to prepare for that. I don't think we should have." He was more than tired.

"I'm already on my way." Clef replied.

"He can't do shit! Watch this!" (Y/n) had managed to get their leg securely over one of the blades, swinging their torso up and successfully laying over two of the five.

"You're lucky we make those out of steel." Iceberg was further unimpressed. 

"You're lucky I'm not as bad as Kain with his shots." They argued back.

"We can sedate Kain, you're just awful!" Iceberg exclaimed loudly.

"Have no fear, Clef is here!" The ukulele man strummed a couple notes before tossing the instrument onto their couch and cracking his knuckles.

"Good. I'm going to go get coffee. When you get them down, the shot is on their kitchen counter." Kondraki left with Bright tagging along to bother him.

"I will be back shortly to help with the shot. I promised to walk Iceberg home." Gears had his arm looped with Iceberg's, who looked happy with the arrangement.

"Just you'n me, sweetheart." he looked up at his partner in crime, feeling cocky.

"I'm gonna raid your fridge." He immediately turned and went right into the kitchen, earning a great bit of objection.

"What? No! Get outta there!" they shouted.

"Come stop me." He stuck his tongue out at them, matching their childish game.

"No way!" They stayed stubborn.

"Then the price of redemption for your crimes is your fruit snacks." He stated.

"Haha! Ate them this morning." (Y/n) felt triumphant and Clef pouted.

"Damn. I didn't think you're impulse control had gotten that out of whack." he said.

"You'd be surprised how bad my impulse control can be." They boasted.

"You leave me no choice." He grabbed a kitchen chair and walked into the living area with it, earning a smug grin.

"What're you gonna do with that, shorty? Reach the top shelf?" They mocked.

"Imma fucking get you 's what imma do." He grumbled, irritated at the nickname, and clambered on top of the wooden chair.

"You'll never reach me." they mused.

"Watch this." He eyed the fan like a cat, his parkor legacy would begin here, he's the greatest jumper to walk the face of the earth, he's-

His internal monologue of a pep talk was cut short when he wobbled.

"Yep. Not doing that." he climbed off, instead grabbing the multi step stool they had in the closet beside the door.

"I hate this thing." He set it out with more effort than one should ever have to use, the stool old and rusted at the ends.

Less than gracefully, he started to ascend, making it most of the way up.

"I feel so bad for you right now. I jumped up here." They chuckled spitefully.

"Not everyone was born with fabulous legs and the ability to gain superpowers once a year at flu season." he grabbed the fan, finally, and they applauded him.

"Great. You're mostly here." they snickered mischievously as he attempted a pull up. 

He failed that pull up terribly. 

Nearly sent plummeting, he knocked over the stool and yelped when he was left to dangle from the metal blade.

"I didn't wanna go out like this!" he yelled.

"I don't want the shot." They retorted. 

"You win! You win! Help me, please!" He conceded defeat and, in seconds, he was grabbed by his shirt and hoisted up and over the side of the fan to lay over it and catch his breath.

"(Y/n), you fool." He grinned a sharp toothed, wicked grin. 

"Oh no…" They shrunk back.

"You've trapped yourself!" he exclaimed, drawing the syringe from his pocket.

(Y/n) screeched with horror, scrambling back and falling off the fan thoughtlessly.

"No you DON'T!!!" He threw himself down to them, landing with a loud Thump! on his knees and immediately screaming. 

"Fuck, shit, goddamn, fuckfuckfuckfuck-" his kneecaps were taking their time recovering, his regeneration a much more painful process than theirs.

"You've betrayed me! You deserve your broken knees!" they tried to dislodge themself from his hold.

"I will put this through your eye!" He held the syringe menacingly and they froze.

"..." He was regretting that. 

"You know I'm a liar, why do you even humor the thought I'd do that?" He stuck them in the arm and they whimpered.

"See, not so bad?" he finally removed his thighs from either side of their torso, standing. They only remained rigid.

"It was a joke." he nudged them with his shoe and sighed. 

"It's over now, you want ice cream?" he offered. "Hello?" he waved a hand in front of them, and finally got a response. 

"Aghuuubfvbbfy!!" their whole body convulsed and shuddered a moment before they sat up, looking at him with more pain than he'd ever seen on them.

"I am never going to let you near me with a syringe again." They stated, horrified.

"I still have it. It'd be cruel of me to stick you for fun." he rolled it in his palm.

"But I am rather cruel." He made a sharp noise and elicited another screech from them as they backed into the wall.

"Another joke, jesus christ, calm down." he tossed the used plastic syringe behind him, just letting it land wherever.

"You calm down, I'm gonna be scared from this!" They exclaimed.

"That's what you get for acting like a child." He crossed his arms and nodded.

"If childishness attracts karma, you're really in for it." They argued right back.

[softkuna]

𝚁𝙴𝙽𝚃-𝙰-𝙱𝙾𝚈𝙵𝚁𝙸𝙴𝙽𝙳 | Hinata

𝚆𝚎𝚕𝚌𝚘𝚖𝚎 𝚝𝚘 𝚁𝙴𝙽𝚃-𝙰-𝙱𝙾𝚈𝙵𝚁𝙸𝙴𝙽𝙳! 𝙴𝚗𝚓𝚘𝚢 𝚢𝚘𝚞𝚛 𝚏𝚒𝚛𝚜𝚝 𝚍𝚊𝚝𝚎 𝚠𝚒𝚝𝚑... 𝙷𝙸𝙽𝙰𝚃𝙰 𝚂𝙷𝙾𝚈𝙾.

Anxiety was a fun thing to deal with sometimes. You know - like when you triple checked the details of the test date you had scheduled today. You pressed a hand to your chest as you woke your phone. Eyes were glued to the pin on the map that your date, Hinata Shoyo: Rental Boyfriend, put on it. You thought maybe, just maybe, he canceled last minute or after seeing your face IRL. A chill ran through you and you muttered to no one in particular, “God, how embarrassing would that be…”

  As you swiped through the app, you pat all around your neck, your cheek, your collarbone in a few nervous motions. Sure, you knew the area. Sure, you went out a few times to sketch the roads for a comic or two. But as you stood, cool fingers drumming nervously along your skin, it all felt unfamiliar.

  A voice cried your name out, jolting your attention away from insecurity for a moment. You squinted, thinking you misheard. The wind! That’s all it was. Just as you were about to check your phone for the nth time, you caught a glimpse of tangerine. Through the hoard of 9-5ers, five fingers raised in a wave until a broad shoulder shimmied its way through the crowd.

“H-Hinata?” His name came out a lot more hushed than you intended and you could feel the heat of your cheeks. Oh no. He’s cute. Duh. You knew he was. He had a profile picture and some extra pics that you and your friend scrolled through the night prior. One caught your eye in particular; it was with a dog that wasn’t his according to the caption (and the added note of ‘but imma get a big boi some day’’). There was another with a guy with short black hair. They all radiated a type of warmth and welcome to them even if those around him seemed ready to punch a wall - a trait not missed out on in person.

  He beamed, taking your hand in his as though it were as natural as the sun shining, “Hey babe!”

  The words put a bar in the cogs of your mind, stopping all rational thought.  Babe. Babe?! Oh fuck. I’m babe! Oh wait. Yeah that’s right. You rented him to be your boyfriend. It’s supposed to be natural. You scolded yourself for forgetting that simple fact. 

Hinata laced his fingers through yours and you could feel the slight dampness of his palm. The thought that he may be as nervous as you put you slightly at ease. It would make sense as he didn’t have any reviews or ratings or anything. He was new! A beta-boyfriend babe!

  It took a moment or two for you to realize that not only was he guiding you down the sidewalk, but you had been staring at nothing but your shoes the entire way there. Shyly, you apologized. 

  “For what, babe? Oh! Wait! I didn’t get to mention yet,” Bright eyes burned with excitement as they tilted over his shoulder, “That’s a cute dress!” He genuinely thought so, too. Trying to act all coupl-y with a stranger was definitely weird, but, like anything he tried, he wanted to put his best effort in. Hinata wasn’t sure on what to expect, truthfully. When looking at your profile after the booking was made, he was caught off guard by how cute you were. In person seemed even worse. Better? Hell if he knew.

  As a lanky waiter shuffled you both into a booth, you were off put by your boyfriend slipping in next to you. Right smack dab next to you. Thigh touching thigh and the heat of his sent a shiver up your spine. You placed a hand on your chest again and spent more time reading a menu than you thought you ever had before.

  Hinata’s expression fell thoughtfully as he saw the slight shake in your slender digits and the way your teeth gnashed at your lower lip. He tilted his head with a small laugh and a nudge to your ribs with his elbow. The corners of his mouth piquing to such a point you could practically feel the mischievousness from it, “Play along, ‘kay? Kay?”

  Suspiciously, you peaked over the top of the menu roof you made with a nod. As the waiter returned, a strong muscled arm wrapped around your shoulder and snuggled you close. Mouth falling into an ajar ‘o’, your confusion was as palpable as his joy, “It’s my girlfriend’s birthday today! You guys got some cake, maybe a candle or OOOH a song?”

  “Hinata!” You smacked his head with the menu, “It’s n-“

  He brought a finger to his lips to silent-shush you, lashes dipping in a wink. You smiled pleasantly, yet awkwardly at the waiter and in the least convincing tone, chimed,  “It’s my birthday. Yaaay.”

  “See! How could you deny that!” His sheer and pointed enthusiasm made up for your lack thereof.

  The waiter, not buying any of it but needing the tips to pay his rent, congratulated you before excusing himself. Ten minutes later, two others trailed behind him singing a specialty birthday tune. In their hands rested the most delicious looking chocolate cake. To say you inhaled that thing would be an understatement. It was creamy, rich, everything you could’ve wanted in a cake.

  “Take a bite!” You offered a forkful to your date, one hand below to catch the droppings. Obliging gleefully, he did.

  “‘m pwetty bad wif dates but I saw you like fweets!” The words came between chews, and he gestured here and there as he swallowed, “Glad you liked it cause we got five more restaurants to try!”

  “Excuse me?!”

  And just like that, Hinata whisked you from one restaurant to another. Each one was slightly ritzier than the last and with each one, he could see the tense scrunch of your shoulders melt away. 

He made you feel safe and you started to joke with him more openly, smile more frequently, and sarcastically quip at him. He liked the way you smacked his arm every time he called the waiters over too dramatically. He liked the way you acted surprised they’d come around the corner with cakes and songs. You managed to melt his heart with the cutest ‘Oh! Babe!’ whenever he tried to genuinely surprise you. He adored watching your eyes light up whenever you got a taste of each decadent sweet. It would be an outright lie to deny that you feeding him made his heart flutter, too.

  You clung to Hinata’s arm, cheek resting heavily on bicep as your stomach decided to churn all the sugar you ate like it was a tilt-a-whirl. He patted your hand, thinking you were just trying to be cute, “So, what made you want to rent someone?” 

  The night sky took over the afternoon sun. Tiredly, you gazed up to your ‘boyfriend’, letting a moment of silence occupy the time it took to get over the small wave of nausea, “This is… embarrassing.” You chuckled softly, letting your fingers fall onto your neck, “I uh… never dated someone before. I have a date set up and got so anxious I almost canceled three times. I really want to put myself out there though and be more comfortable.“

  “Is that why you were so red?! I thought I was meeting a cherry when I saw you! All like –“ His hands flew to his cheeks in a damn near perfect imitation of you and your voice, “-i-i-it’s n-n-ot m-my-“ before he could stutter the rest out, you interrupted with a loud and embarrassed groan. His laugh hissed passed teeth, “It was cute! You’re adorable, ya know?” The words slipped out so naturally and with such warmth that you wondered where the act was put down and where it was picked back up.

  “As I was saying,” you jested with a light hearted eye roll, “My friend was really worried about me. I mean, it’s not often you’re a date-virgin in your twenties.”

  Hinata pursed his lips, thinking about it, “Ya know, maybe it is weird - ” You felt your heart stop and your comfort crack just slightly. You probably would have laughed had it not been for the wave of heat then ice that swept over you, “- that someone as… as…” His lips pursed as he tried to find a word. Your anxiety built with each delayed second. In a grand gesture, his arms swang back, “WH’BAM as you never got asked out before!” Despite your death grip on him, the ginger still managed to hop on cue, “’sides! You got a pretty good friend looking after you!”

  “Heh,” You laughed, “Guess you’re right, but wh’bam?”

  “It just makes sense!” He slapped your hand a few times with the soft palm of his, “Okay okay! Now, we’re going to that one!” A finger pointed to a fancy black double door. 

  “Hinata I-“ You began to protest, feeling your palms dampen and your stomach curdle. 

  “Don’t worry about price! I got it!” He tugged at your arm.

  “N-no, We need to-“

  “You’ve been having such a good time! We can do one more!”

  “Just come over h-here-“

  “This one has the best cake from what I read! It’s not too expensiiiiiiive.”

  The end of his sentence tumbled out of his mouth like the night’s worth of cake and frosting tumbled out of your gut. Directly onto the ground. And on the expensive nude heels your friend leant you. And on Hinata’s own pricy looking sneakers.

  There was a moment of silence as you lit the coffin of your pride and watched it sail away into the ocean. (Goodbye sweet trait, it was nice while it lasted. Rest in Pieces.)

  Hinata blinked. The event registered in his squirrel brain like a dial up modem. She just threw up. It’s on my shoe. It’s on her shoe. OH NO I MADE HER THROW UP! Red alerts blared as he whipped his head around, making the biggest display of ‘nothing to see here’ that could’ve been humanly possible. All too easily, he slid an arm under your knees and scurried around for a place to sit. It took about ten minutes for him to find a bench on an empty walkway. He sat you down and patted your head with long, sweet strokes. Each pat, while good natured, went unnoticed as your intestines tried to murder you in cold blood.

  Hinata sprinted for the convenience store and bought the first couple of antacids he could find, along with some anti-nausea medication and water. A small bit of sweat broke out along his brow as he dashed back to you. Agile as a leaf in the wind, he squatted right in front of you, hurriedly dumped everything out of the double-bagged plastic bags to give to you. He stuttered out his menu of medications and you down some of them with water.

  “Hey, heeey,” his gentle voice cooed to you, both hands rubbing your arms in soothing motions (a little roughly, but he’s trying), “It’s okay, you’re okay, you don’t need to cry!” You waved a hand, lips parted as you waited for another wave to hit which never came. You thought he’d make fun of you, laugh in your face about how pathetic this was, but it never came. For some reason that made you even more emotional. He was just a rental boyfriend. He didn’t need to deal with this. Instead of quitting then and there, Hinata took a seat right next to you and pulled you to his chest. Your back flinched reflexively as a calloused hand rubbed calming circles along it. He started talking about a time he was at a volleyball game and had the nervous-shits so bad he nearly had to sit out.

  “That’s… disgusting,” The words came out as a half-laugh, half-cry. You wiped your eyes, ignoring the makeup now dripping down your face from sweat and tears.

  “You’re telling me! Tanaka called me ‘little-shits’ for two months after that!” His laugh was contagious, spreading warmth through your fingertips and toes. It was rare to meet someone who had such a natural talent to make you feel so wholly accepted.

  After about 10 minutes, the medication began to fully settle your stomach. The bag was tossed into a stray trash can. Hinata had barely even realized that his chin was perched on the crown of your head as he talked about other embarrassing stories (including the time he got pegged in the nuts during training camp). The warmth of you in his hold simply belonged and he didn’t want to let go just yet.

  “Thank you,” you peered up at him with eyes so pretty and a smile so kind he wanted to kiss it then and there.

  “For what?” His head tilted again. If he were a puppy, his ears would flop with each tilt.

  “Being so sweet to me for my first trial date. Even if it’s your job, you really went above and beyond. And uh…you know-” You kicked your shoe to his.

  The athlete ruffled his hair, feeling a blush creep to his cheeks and ears at the thought of being your first date, “Don’t need to thank me for it! I had a blast! You’re pretty warm too!”

  “Thanks?” You sputtered a small laugh before checking your phone and the time. It was nearly up. As per request, a text of your location was sent to the friend who started it all.

  For a while, you rested in Hinata’s hold, savoring the rich batter of comfort and calm it baked you in. He chattered on about this and that, exchanging a remark here and there when you poked fun. 

Once you pulled away from him, he couldn’t help but miss the feel of your mold on the palm of his hand like a volleyball right at the precipice – right in his reach. You checked your violently buzzing phone, confirming the spot where you were sitting to your friend. 

“Who was that?” Hinata asked, a boyish hint of pouting sad laced underneath his natural curiosity.

“My friend,” you answered, popping another antacid in your mouth, “our time is up, so she’ll be here soon.”

 Those words were a bitter sound, one that reminded Hinata that this wasn’t real. This was a bet that he wanted to win. One that he secretly cursed. In all reality, he wanted to have fun and when he saw that you booked him, he didn’t know what to think. Dating wasn’t really his thing. He rarely had time to when it came to practice and had it not been for the bet, he probably wouldn’t have sought someone out at all, let alone someone as out of his league as you.

  The headlights of your friend's car came into view. Just as you went to take a step forward, a strong hand circled around your wrist. In a swift movement, you turned to look at the culprit. 

  “Just make sure to rent me again if you have some time, yeah?” Hinata’s smile held a hint of something you couldn’t identify. 

 Nevertheless, you returned the sentiment, “Of course!”

You parted with a long hug.

As the car pulled away, Hinata flicked through his phone. Once the dates were done, each point of contact would be deleted automatically. A reasonable company policy that felt like a sour punch to the gut.. A small twinge of sadness came over him, but he knew that if it was meant to be, you’d find your way to each other again. In the mean time…

   𝚆𝚎𝚕𝚌𝚘𝚖𝚎 𝚝𝚘 𝚁𝙴𝙽𝚃-𝙰-𝙱𝙾𝚈𝙵𝚁𝙸𝙴𝙽𝙳 𝚢𝚘𝚞 𝚑𝚊𝚟𝚎.... 𝟷 𝙽𝚎𝚠 𝙱𝚘𝚘𝚔𝚒𝚗𝚐!

  He was going to kick Atsumu’s pancake ass!

 “Sooooo~ How was the ‘date’? Looks like you two got along!” Your friend’s voice rang as she shimmied in her seat in excitement, brows wiggling in expectation.

  “Oh shut it!” You cried in false annoyance, “I threw up, can you believe that?!” Dramatically, she gasped, listening as you recounted the events of the boy who was the sun itself. Finalizing your long winded tale of cake-filled adventure, that same warmth spread across your chest, lapping small butterfly wings at your stomach, “I had a good time. I… definitely feel more comfortable with the idea of putting myself out there now.”

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