#so I didn’t consider this a total waste of money
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angeltannis · 2 months ago
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Had a moment of weakness
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ohnopeh · 4 months ago
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i was rewatching gallavich scenes (no one’s surprised) and to be honest, i think the whole monogamy thing is pretty clear from the beginning ( to us, cause they’re dumb )
neither of them want the other to fuck other people but they share one braincell thinking the other wants to mess around. ian talks about monogamy saying its about not having sex with others and mickey expression changes
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he’s clearly panicking wondering if ian mentioned it because his husband wants to fuck around. he doesn’t want to lose ian and is afraid that saying yes to monogamy could be a deal breaker (im pretty sure mickey was feeling insecure as fuck about not being a good husband since they fought about the money, job etc.)
when ian sees mickey’s reaction, he mistakes it as disappointment/disagreement with being monogamous. you can totally see he’s regretting mentioning it and wondering how the hell he’s going to get out of that situation.
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he’s like ‘what the fuck what is this reaction what is going on why isn’t he saying he wants to have sex with me only?’ (cause again, one braincell shared)
so they’re just dumb fuckers who want the other to be happy but they just confuse each other, not realising they want the same thing. mickey asks ian what exactly is counted as having sex : blowjobs, proper fucking? because he wants to know what ian would want from others and if he can handle that, but of course ian thinks that’s mickey asking because he is the one who wants to fuck around!
none of them want to just disappoint the other so mickey plays it cool saying ‘you don’t want to fuck other people?!’ (reminds me of ‘you don’t want to fuck angie? everybody fucks angie’) and of course ian’s defensive too saying ‘me fucking you only? no�� so difficult… no… i could never… not like ive been doing so for 10 years… going back to you all the time… saying sex with you is fucking fantastic… no….’
but then ian says
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that’s his way of trying to let mickey know he’s actually not into the whole open relationship thing. but considering they just keep saying they want to do it, mickey simply thinks ian is being hypocrite, not being able to see what he truly meant by that. when ian writes down that he wants monogamy, he’s being honest and i suppose he kept on thinking mickey wanted to fuck around cause he didn’t show his answer (which was mickey’s way of trying to do what ian wanted cause he always want ian to be happy and will do anything for him)
they just keep being dumb as hell until the episode where they have sex with other people. you can see mickey has realised ian isn’t into it but doesn’t want to admit it, to keep mickey happy— because mickey is taking the piss out of ian by pretending he’s having the time of his life trying to find new friends to fuck around with.
( again, ian is forcing them to find gay friends just because he thinks that’s what they’re supposed to do to archive their new happy life )
mickey staying with the other gay couples for drinks he doesn’t like, company he dislikes. he waits for ian to call it a night and even then he took the piss out of ian asking if he really wanted to leave. they end up having sex with the others but once they’re home ian says it was a waste of time and mickey points out they did want ian wanted so badly, making gay friends and having sex with other people. so how is that a waste of time if ian wanted this all along?
mickey asks
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(are you still going to pretend we want to fuck other people?) and ian admits that, no, he doesn’t want that. he doesn’t want gay friends to talk about their sex life or friends to bang just because. explaining he’s okay to have lip ( and mickey ) as their only friends cause they’re alike and that’s what he needs. he doesn’t have to force himself to be different or fit somewhere.
i know people also discuss the scene where ian is at the gym in their new apartment, where he smiles at the guy flirting with him. to me that scene was just ian being taken by surprise ( as he didn’t really expect the guy to hear him ) and maybe even glad that there are gay and accepting people around them (not like southside) so it only proved more and more that their life in the north side could do good to mickey too. it makes sense because in the same episode mickey freaks out about the new place, it shows how they react to changes and ‘safeness’ as mickey says it makes him feel uncomfortable to have a better life, something new that he has no control over (like him saying he has no idea how to escape safely from the northside/their new house— if needed)
long story short : they are dumb and always want the other to be happy but scared to communicate properly and mess things up. they only want each other in all the way and that’s what it is and will be forever! shameless writers for s10-11 were something else tho, im sure there were better ways to write this plot but still lol
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justlemmeadoreyou · 1 year ago
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windfall | (mechanic!harry part2)
summary: part 2 to this
word count: 2k
warnings: cursing
masterlist | ask box(requests are open!)
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As you walked away from the garage, frustration and annoyance built up within you. Harry's indifferent and grumpy attitude was not making this situation any easier. You considered finding another garage, but deep down, you knew that might not be a feasible option given the state of your car.
You didn’t even want to go to work today. Sleeping curled up in the backseat of the car had made your body sore, especially your back. But leaving work would mean staying at the garage all day, listening to scolds from Harry, and you didn’t want that either.
So, you decided to go to work.
Walking to the nearest bus stop, you managed to get a bus that dropped you off near your office, but you still would have to walk half a mile.
Great.
You reached the office after about an hour, completely disheveled and tired. You had gotten a bit sweaty too, that failed the purpose of taking a shower, and you were already in the need of another.
Walking in, the receptionist as well as the other few looked at you judgmentally, but you successfully managed to ignore them, too tired to start a conversation and explain your circumstances.
Walking to your worn-out leather chair, you threw your bag on the table, and slumped down on the chair. You looked at your computer, and then at the pile of files you had on your table, as well as the reports you had to finish working on, to get signed by Jake, your boss. You pouted; it was so much work for just one person. The worn-out chair creaked as you shifted, contemplating how to tackle the mountain of tasks in front of you.
Turning on the computer, you got up from your chair, and decided to go for a coffee run.
Turning the coffee machine on, and placing your cup below, you stared at the liquid pouring down as it gradually filled the cup. After a few moments, another person entered the room, and you looked over your shoulder.
Thankfully, it was your friend, Mia.
Mia was one of the very few girls in the office who worked at the same position as you, and you two had grown really close over the past  6 months, when she had driven you home one night from the bar, you had been really wasted and she was he only one sober. She had made you drink water, take a Tylenol, and tucked you in.  She was so caring.
She walked with a smile up to you, proceeding to retrieve her own cup. She then came and stood next to you, while the machine was still filling up your cup.
“Morning.”
“Morning. You look tired. What happened?” she asked. You sighed and frowned, as all of the things that had happened in just the last 24 hours came rushing back, making you want to cry so bad.
“Yeah, I took the bus, and walked like, half a mile to reach here”
“Oh god. What about your car?”
“It totaled. And my apartment too, it’s gone. My landlord kicked me out.”
“Jesus, that’s awful. So you slept in your car?”
“Mhm” you removed your cup, and replaced it with hers. Taking a sip, you closed your eyes as it cascaded down your throat. You hadn’t eaten anything since yesterday afternoon, and the coffee gave you some energy to finish some of your work, till the afternoon at least.
“I’m so sorry, Y/N.” she frowned too, feeling sorry for you.
“It’s alright. Should have seen that coming. I mean, I spent so much money on the concert tickets last month, I almost went broke. I couldn’t even pay rent, and it was due since so many months”
“Still. That’s so bad. If you want, you can stay at mine for a few days. My roommate has gone for a trip and I think she’ll come back next week”
Your eyes brightened. She was such a gem. You immediately put your cup down, and hugged her.
“Thank you so much. So so much”
Rest of the day went by great. You were able to submit 5 reports, and completed most of the files and cleared them off your desk. You had finally managed to find a place to live, at least for the next few days, and you were sure you could figure something out till then.
Walking back to the garage, you had a cute smile on your face. The prospect of having a place to stay for the next few days infused you with a sense of relief, and not having to see Harry everyday was an added advantage.
Reaching the garage, you spotted your car and walked to it. There was someone down below, working on it. You decided to sit by for a bit, to find Harry and tell him about the new conditions. Surely, he will be glad to see less of you throughout the week.
You knocked the hood of the car, hoping the person below would listen.
He came sliding out, but he wasn’t Harry.
And he was gorgeous. Bright blue eyes, with brunette hair. He was wearing a tank-top, the shirt tied around his waist. There was a bit of grease here and there, but you didn’t mind.
“Yeah?”
You blinked and shook your head, bringing your eyes back up to his face.
“Uh-yeah. I was just-I came to ask that-Oh-this-this is my car. I wanted to ask, is there any progress?” you stumbled a bit around your words, but managed to blurt out at least an understandable sentence.
“Oh, yeah. I checked the engine and it was…well, in a bad condition. I will have to replace the air filters, check the exhaust and combustion, and the fuel too. Will have to replace the battery too”
He got up, cleaning his hands on a stray cloth.
“Oh. It’s not totaled yet, is it?”
“No, lord no.  It’ll be much lower than that. How much did you buy this for?”
“About 35,000 dollars”
“Nope, this will be about 600 dollars.”
“Oh, thank god. I met, Harry? In the morning. And he scared me so bad. I felt that it was gone”
“No, he just likes to give hard time to everyone. I’m Niall, by the way” he extended his hand for a handshake, and you gladly did.
“Hi. I’m Y/N. And he really scared me so much.”
“Yeah, he just does that so people use their cars better. Or at least live in fear till the repair is done. “
You shook your head, and remembered that you had to pack up your stuff, since Mia, and the moving truck was going to be here soon.
“That’s so bad. Is he around?”
“Yeah, he’s in the back. I’ll call him.”
“Sure”
He went in and came back after a while, and Harry still had his nose scrunched up, and shoulders slumped, hands crossed in the front.
“What’s up?” he asked.
“Oh-I wanted to tell you that-my friend, she offered me her apartment for a while, so for a week, I will be living with her. So I’ll take my stuff away and you can take my number, call me if it’s done.”
“Cool. But I don’t do calls. You’ll have to be come and check yourself”
“Don’t be a dick” Niall interrupted, “I can take your number. I’ll call you if it’s done early”
You smiled, and gave him your number. He promised to call you, and reassured you that he’ll do his best work on it. It made you feel a bit relaxed, and at ease. At least, everyone was not as rude as Harry. Soon, Mia came with her car and a truck, so you could move your stuff from your old apartment as soon as possible. There wasn’t much: a couch, two almirahs, your bed which had been dissembled, the mattress a TV, a refrigerator, an oven, kitchen utensils and an induction. Some other small appliances too, like the iron, straightener, etc, but that could fit in your bag.
After everything was loaded and your car was empty, you gave the keys to Niall, and picked up your bag, walking to Mia’s car and keeping it in the backseat. You went around and sat in the front, as she drove away to her place, the truck following behind.
The night was dark as Mia's car cruised through the quiet streets. You sat in the front seat, staring out of the window as the city lights blurred and headlights blinked. The stress of your car and the situation of next week, when her roommate would be back, still lingered on your shoulders. But, you were glad to have found a temporary refuge at her place.
Upon reaching Mia's place, you stepped out of the car. The air inside was cozy and inviting. Mia led the way, and you followed suit, hauling your heavy back awkwardly.
After moving your stuff to a corner, you both slumped down on the couch. The day had been tiring, but the welcoming aroma of her home made you feel at ease.
With Mia's help, you settled into the spare room she had graciously offered. It wasn't much, but it was a haven compared to the uncertainty of your car. You thanked Mia again, overwhelmed by her kindness, and assured her that you would find a more permanent solution soon.
The night unfolded with shared laughter, stories, and a home-cooked meal. Mia was a great cook, and you hadn’t tasted her food in so many months. You talked and laughed, and having dinner with a friend was so comforting. As the clock ticked away, fatigue set in, and you found solace in the softness of the spare bed.
Morning light filtered through the curtains, gently waking you from a restful sleep. You opened your bag and took out your toiletries, and laid out the clothes for the day. Brushing your teeth, freshening up and taking a bath, you felt so much better than you did yesterday.
As you sat on the dining table drinking coffee with Mia, your phone buzzed.
It was an unknown number.
Hey, it’s Niall
Your heartbeat increased in your chest. The gorgeous brunette had messaged you?!
You put the cup down, taking the phone down. Opening his chat, you quickly typed out a reply:
Hi, good morning, Niall :)
You didn’t respond to texts from unknown mechanics with a good morning message and a smile usually, but he was different. He treated you with so much kindness, and to be honest, you had a little crush on him.
His response was quick,
Morning, love. How you been? Sleep well?
Your heart fluttered at the endearment in his message. It was unexpected, especially considering your recent interactions with mechanics, particularly the grumpy Harry. Niall's tone was a stark contrast, and you couldn't help but smile at the screen.
Yeah, slept better knowing my car is in good hands. Thanks again for your help. And you?
you replied, genuinely interested in how his night had been.
Niall's response was swift,
Glad to hear that! I slept like a log, thanks. You off to work? Yeah. You? Already there. Was working on your car just before I texted Oh. Well…good luck, I guess??? Lol. Yeah, it's all in a day's work. Don't worry; I've got it covered. Your car will be up and running smoothly in no time. Thanks, Niall. I appreciate it. No worries, love. Call me if you need anything. Sure, thanks
You closed your phone, throwing it inside your bag, you walked out to the door with a huge smile on your face.
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a/n: i tried writing it better!hoip
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m4ndysk4nkovich · 4 months ago
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Do you have any Debbie + Ian headcanons? Pre-canon or otherwise
eek!! yes i have many… and a lot of them are pre-canon because i’m a sucker for pre-canon
i’ve written about this before (and never published it lol), but i could see one of ian’s first memories being around debbie’s birth or her actual birth. frank said something about most of his kids being born in the gallagher house, and i believe debbie was born on the same table she gave birth to franny on. ian was really excited to be a brother because of lip’s influence, and when he held debbie for the first time, he kept calling her “my baby” and getting defensive when anyone tried to take her away (which was reasonable considering he was only four and couldn’t really hold her properly without help). when they got older, maybe five and nine, they would play together with the barbie lip took from the 99¢ store and ian’s g.i. joe, debbie was very bossy and kept interjecting whenever ian tried to do anything because she had a specific plan.
whenever frank would come home wasted or monica would be having another episode, ian would grab debbie (like he does in 2x08 and 11x07) and comfort her. he would convince himself that, yet again, he was following in lip’s footsteps and helping debbie, but a part of him knew he too wanted that comfort because he didn’t often get it.
debbie has painted ian’s nails… on several occasions. when they were kids and debbie would do it, ian would insist she picks a color that wouldn’t be noticeable and would pick it off his nails before school the next day. when ian got older and debbie would do it, he didn’t really care what she did and would keep it on (even if he ended up biting it off later). maybe as an emt sue would tease him, but he’d just brush it off. franny ends up painting his, too.
around two, maybe more, times, debbie would come with ian to the milkovich house. ian would go over to study with mandy (and sneak into mickey’s room to “go to the bathroom”), and debbie would talk with mandy. she felt really cool doing this, and on the walk home debbie would excitedly tell ian about how awesome she thinks mandy is. this is around season two
while working at the kash and grab in the summer, debbie (and sometimes carl) would walk there from the public pool and debbie would convince ian to give her money for some candy or a drink. ian always intended on doing so, but he would pretend to put up a fight to irritate her.
anytime ian (or any of her siblings) was sick or hurt and needed to stay in bed, debbie would sneak into his room and talk to him like he has terminal cancer and weeks to live. ian always found it sweet, even if he would playfully roll his eyes and tell her to get out.
when debbie was pregnant, she would send ian photos of her baby bump. she wouldn’t often get more than a “❤️”, but she appreciated it considering she felt so alone, but always knew she’d have her brother.
because season ten confirmed debbie’s a stoner as an adult (twice, lol) i can imagine her smoking on the porch with ian like she did with sandy. he’d talk about mickey, she’d talk about franny, they’d laugh about their other siblings.
i can’t really think of anything else but if anyone’s seeing this and wants more headcanons i’ll happily post them, my blog’s kinda dead now (which is totally my own fault lol)
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secretivemessenger · 2 years ago
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long time no see... 🫣
Sugarbaby!BtmZhongli x ProviderTop!MR
Now everybody and they mfing mama know zhongli broke asf 😒..
but the past few days he's been "working" with you he's begun to grow some affection. You specifically told him not to catch feelings and what does he do? catch fucking feelings. Good thing you don't know that...or maybe you do and you're just not saying anything? Maybe you're waiting for a chance to humiliate him? He wouldn't be mad if you did.
he pondered and pondered, going insane from the thought that you might reject him. Anytime he'd see you walking the streets of Liyue he'd immediately walk the other direction, just hoping you didn't see him. Too bad the feeling of desperation eventually came up to him and he was left touch starved, so he thought of the most reasonble solution.
pathetically ask for Mora because he totally did not spend it all on random shit so he could have his sweet moments with you.
TWS!
Spanking, Impact play, humiliation, begging, deep throat, gagging, ect.
I have a feeling a fangic like this had already been made but I much prefer to see you write it
Failed Contract
Bottom zhongli x top male reader
Rating: NSFW
warnings: Friends w benefits! Unrequited love! Mean reader! Deep throating! Face fucking! Spanking! Orgasm denial! Multiple orgasms! Fingering! Angst at the end?!
Author note: ahem- so uh… i know this took sooooo long to come out 😀 so long like more than three months. Im sorry 😭 but is just that I never had the motivation to do it but now i do (somehow).
Kinda hate this ngl-
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The moment this all began, the both of you agreed on one thing thats considered as a part of the “terms and conditions”. And that was, don’t catch feelings. do and this is all over. - These were your very own words.
He thought it would got smoothly for him. Getting the money from you in exchange to you using his body however you like, then you’ll just continue to live on your life like it never even happened. And he never worried about “catching feelings” or such.
He took this a bit too lightly for his own good. After spending more time with you without even realizing it, he was head over heels for you.
And so he broke the only rule you had set for him. He knows if you found out this would all be over, but he doesn’t want that. He still wants you, he still wants to feel your hands on him. Even if he knows he shouldn’t be feeling this was, he still want his heart to continue beating for you. But he’s sure as hell you don’t feel the same. And he knows that it would only end badly if you were to find out.
So the only logical option is for him to distant himself. Because he knows how bad he is at holding himself back when near you.
Well spoilers: that did not work. It only resulted in him being more desperate then he ever was. It felt like torture away from you, and you didn’t approach him first and it made him even more desperate.
Till he said “Fuck it” and hurriedly went running looking for you. He just wants to be near you and held by you, even if it’s only you holding his legs up to give yourself better access inside him.
Once he found you he knew exactly whats the magic word that he had to say. “Got any mora to spare?”. Per your agreement, if he wanted money he had to satisfy you first.
Without a word you went back to your house with zhongli following behind like a little puppy. Upon reaching the house and closing the door he didn’t waste a singular second and sat down on his knees mouth wide open waiting for you to do however you please.
You couldn’t help but chuckle at the obvious desperation in his eyes. Along side the adorable desperate eyes is an eager one, wanting to please and be pleased already.
Saliva dripped down his opened mouth, with his tongue sticking out. You always found the shape of his tongue so fascinating. it was paler than normal human tongue and much more longer. You can already imagine how it would feel like around you.
You pressed your index to the surface of his tongue. observing his reaction as you moved your fingers deeper, tracing his tongue as you made your way down his throat.
He looked so majestic. Slowly gagging at your fingers invading his mouth, almost at the verge of tears. You made his body twitch needly because of the way you looked down at him. Almost like he was some type of a dessert, and you were ready to eat him whole.
Soon the desperation turned to arousal which turned to greed. He wanted more of you rather than just fingers, even if he didn’t say it directly you can see it deep down his eyes. He wanted to be messed up, so why deny him?.
You wasted no time in undoing your pant, already half hard. The sight of your cock always made his mouth water and eyes shine with lust. Wanting you inside of him sooner rather than later.
Slowly guiding him to take you in his mouth. His tongue wrapped around your cock hungrily. His oh so warm mouth, it made you pant loudly. “Amazing as always” you said it with a hint of amusement in your tone of voice. You grunted while throwing your head back, it felt fucking incredible. His tongue working your cock so good, throat so tight around you “such a good boy, doing so good for me”.
Zhongli felt his whole body shiver and shake at you words, it brought him to tears how much of an effect you have on him.
Yes he’s a good boy only for you <3
He just wants to continue being good for you, he wants to be the source of your pleasure. If he can’t have your love, he’ll be enough with being able to make you cum because of him.
He continued teasing your tip with the back of his throat, while tracing the veins with his tongue. By time it became even harder to hold back, if this continued you’ll just burst completely. Even so you didn’t pull out instead you pushed his head impossibly more deeper, putting up a tight grip on his hair. It made him let out an adorable whimper as tears streamed down his face, it just left you in “aww”.
As you fucked his throat like a little toy you noticed his body reacting to your thrusts. His body arched so beautifully all of a sudden. Soon your confused sound turned to hysterical laughter. Looking down you can see a large spot on his pants.
He just came inside his pants. Why? Just because you acted a bit roughly with him. How funny for none other than the geo archon to cum all over himself like a virgin.
“If i knew fucking your throat is all it takes to make you like this I would’ve done this sooner”. Soon your laughter came down to a stop. “But i don’t remember giving you the permission to cum”.
Zhongli’s embarrassment disappeared once he heard your words. Grabbing his hair and roughly pulling him away from your cock made him whine in pain. “You better Handle the consequences of your own actions, Morax”
You almost ripped his clothes apart from how rough you handled him. It made him gasp loud in surprise. Stripping him naked, you harshly pushed his head against the wooden door. Looking at his quivering body turned you on even more. His thighs covered in his own fluid from a while ago.
His ass too clear to your liking. You raised your hands just to bring it back again on his ass, his body jolted in surprise. he let out a choked out cry as your hand’s smacked his ass again and again, until you felt satisfied enough. The clear skin now had obvious handprints on it. His face couldn’t look more fucked up than it is now.
Swallowing his moans. He looked back at you with beginning eyes as he huffed out in between hiccups “please, do it already”. Spanking was a good punishment, but you still wanted to bully him a bit more.
“Do what? You know I can’t read minds” you said with a wide mischievous smile on your face. It would usually make him so embarrassed, but now he was so desperate to have you inside of him that he lost all the self dignity that he had. He does not care anymore about how shameful it is to beg, he just wants you so so bad.
“Please, i want you inside of me” he cried out “please pleaseplease, pleasseee”. You wanted to laugh at his pathetic pleadings. But the way your cock twitched at the sight. It felt impossible to hold back anymore. Yet you still somehow did it.
Due to avoiding you for quite sometime means thats his hole is absolutely not stretched enough to handle you yet. And You weren’t ‘that’ mean to just ram inside of him without preparations.
So you spat on his hole before using your fingers to spread it all around his rim. A mixture of ‘please’ and whines of your name escaped his mouth.
A loud yelp was what you received when your fingers went past his rim. Determined to stretch him well enough that you can fuck him for continuous hours without stopping.
One finger became two, two fingers became three which soon turned to four. Four fingers stuffing him full. He would’ve came so many times if it wasn’t for your other hand squeezing his tip. Denying any droplet of cum to escape. Which left zhongli a breathless crying mess. Until you deemed him ready.
You didn’t have much energy to tease him or hold back anymore, so you took your chance and rammed your cock all the way hitting his prostate first try.
With that singular thrust he came all over himself, painting the brown door white “Hah, you came just because i put it in? Thats pathetic of you morax” you teased him which resulted in his face becoming full of shame as it dusted dark pink. But it didn’t last long till you started railing him hard again.
You could swear everyone is hearing you two right now from how loud zhongli was being. Moaning out like a needy slut. Screaming your name so loud you actually suspect he’s doing it to show off how much of a whore he is for you.
Going in and out at a fast pace, hitting his prostate with every thrust you make made it all more pleasurable. And from the overstimulation he went through when you denied him his orgasm multiple times made him extra sensitive. And it didn’t take him long for him to cum all over himself again and again, till he can no longer cum anymore.
Chasing your own orgasm. You wrapped your hands around his tummy going in slow and deep, just to feel every part of his warm hole around you.
You both were in such intimate position that it almost made him forget that your weren’t actually together. You were connected together but it still wasn’t what he wanted.
“You like me don’t you” a confused ‘huh’ was let out by zhongli. He looked back at you confused, then that confusion turned to a terrified expression. You never stopped your movements, still fucking into him.
He couldn’t think of a word to say as you kept your steady motion. Before you grunted and pulled out. Jerking yourself off just to cum with a loud sigh. Painting both his back and ass with your cum.
Once you were done his leg’s finally gave up on him and he fell down to the floor. He didn’t know what to say so you talked instead of him.
“As the god of contacts, to break one of the rules of the contract must be a huge sin, eh” silence was what you received so you continued “as per contract, since the only rule was broken. The contract is cancelled.”
“Take this last session as a parting gift” you said as you turned to leave before remembering “oh and have your portion” you said as you threw a bag filled with mora his way. “Never see me again” was all you said before leaving zhongli who’s seated down on the floor being as speechless as a rock.
He was just dumbfounded that he got thrown away like that, thrown away like nothing but a cheap expired toy.
“This was all just a big mistake”
🏷️: @gaybitchfx @vyloy
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bubzebii · 1 year ago
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We all have cravings
Yan! Mikey x reader
This is kinda like a part two for the Yan Mikey hc I made. Also just know this is strictly fiction, I do NOT support this Irl if you do please seek help. This is my contribution to horrortober ig. I did not proof read this at all so I hope u enjoy my brain rot.
Tw: build up, poor writing, blood, kidnapping, yandere themes, cannibalistic themes, anxiety, panic attacks, nonconsensual touching (nonsexual), overall bad time for y/n
I hate my job. Customer service is bitch in a half, I swear to god customer service employees are doing gods work. I can’t even wipe tables in piece without some lady yelling at me about how her frappe has too much ice like it’s a global issue. What’s worse is how I spend 8 hours of my life for this, I need a better job.
Walking down the slightly empty streets of New York, my body aching for my beloved bed. I look at the shops as I walk by, absorbing all the trinkets and doodads inside. One place though, stopped me in my tracks, a quaint little bakery near by an alleyway. the inside had a golden glow to it, it was almost unreal, beautiful, and the smell was amazing.
so as any normal young adult would do, I walk in, not knowing what I want to buy. I instantly feel regret setting inside my stomach, why did I walk in? Oh god I can’t just leave without buying anything, maybe they didn’t noticed I walked in? Looking around right as that thought sped through my mind, I made eye contact with the baker, they greeted me, but god of course they saw me.
Well due to social obligation, I HAVE to buy something. Panic started to rise as I still have no idea what to buy, knowing the baker isn’t even rushing me, the panic is still there. Just as I thought all hope was lost, I felt another pair of eyes on me. Turning I see a man in a trench coat and fedora, staring at me through the glass like I’m one of the wonders of the world. Weirdo. We make eye context for a second before he snaps out of it, and stumbles inside.
Thank god, an out I thought as the man walked closer to the counter. “You can order first if you’d like, Im still deciding.” We made eye contact again, despite the added difficulty the fedora he was wearing made. “Wow, thanks stranger! You know this place has some delicious raspberry sweet rolls! I totally recommend them if you haven’t tried any!” Sweet rolls? As a recommendation? This dude just keeps getting weirder and weirder, but considering I don’t know what else to get, I might as well try it, what’s the harm? “Hmm that does sound tempting, maybe I will” making sure to add a smile after, the man seems to beam at my remark. “Trust me, they are AMAZING especially with some chamomile tea and vanilla scones”
Pfft- What are you? A rich old white British lady? “Pfft hahahah! Good one, it really does sound like I am huh?” He continues to laugh even harder as the “joke” sets in as I stare in shock and horror. Did I really just say that out loud? “My names Mikey, what’s yours stranger?” He says while wiping a tear from his eye. “Oh uhm- y/n” were doing introductions now I guess. “Well y/n it’s nice to meet you” holding his hand out, I didn’t fail to notice the green skin and the three fingers outstretched towards me.
Oh my god, what the hell?! An excuse, think of an excuse. “We should probably order, don’t wanna hold up the line” good one me. He looks behind us and I follow suit; low and behold, no one else of course. He chuckles before turning back to me and says, “I guess you have a point”. Retracting his hand he turns to the cashier and places his order. The cashier told him that he’s gonna have to wait for 20 minutes for it to be ready, Mikey nods and turns to me before asking the cashier for those raspberry sweet rolls. Oh god-
“Oh can you make those separate?” I sputter before Mikey quickly answers, “I insist, I don’t want you to waste your money if you don’t like it!” Convincing argument plus free food? You win this round “Mikey”.
After paying Mikey and I go to sit down at a nearby booth. Maybe I have him pegged wrong my mind started rationalizing. Maybe it’s a medical condition? We sat for a good minute in silence as I’m overthinking per usual. “So, what do plan to do with a whole loaf of zope bread?” I say to avoid the loud thoughts buzzing through my head. “Oh! Well I was planning on making it myself but I might as well try this places zone, I’m planning on pairing it with some-“ before he can continue, the cashier called out the raspberry sweet rolls to catch out attention.
I got the rolls and walked back to the booth. “Well, here’s my order”
“So…see ya…”
Before I could even take a step though, Mikey shot up “whaaat?! B-but you didn’t even try it! I want to see if you like it or not!” He stared at me with pleading eyes, like a dog begging it’s human for a treat. Why is he so invested in this? “I didn’t think you’d want to know my feedback..” “well duhhh, I recommend it to you, I just have to know i hit the nail on the head!” Oh… well whatever it takes to leave faster. I grabbed a roll and popped it in my mouth, it was EXPLODING with flavor. I think Mikey could tell with the knowing smirk that spread across his face.
After that we started talking more in the restaurant, I got to know him more. Apparently he has three more brothers, when he made me guess which one he was, it wasn’t hard to tell he’s the youngest. Eventually his order was done, disappointment sent in me because, well, this was actually a pleasant interaction with a not so total stranger. Acquaintance if you will. By the time his order was ready, I already ate all the rolls, so I guess this is it.
“It was nice meeting you, I didn’t really plan staying out this late.” I said as we walked out, the sky nearly dark. “It was reallyyy nice meeting you too, you know…” he stated reaching in his pocket. “If you need any more expert cooking advice, give me a call!”
.
.
.
That should’ve been it, but noooo, I just HAD to call back, we just HAD to get to know each other more, he just HAD to show me his “secret” identity…I just HAD to fall in love…no..for his tricks
It all started with food, a fucking roll no less. He fed me and like a wild animal I kept coming back. I ignored all the red flags, all my friends concerns, not noticing how they quickly left my life after venting to Mikey about them. I kept coming back for more like a dumb dumb animal.
But now here I am, a small closet with one twin bed and barren walls, no fan or vent. What did I do to deserve this? What avengers level threat did I cause to end up here? There’s barely anything to do besides relive old mistakes and sweat. Dare I say it, I even miss my job and being a useful member of society.
The door finally opened the reveal the devil himself, Mikey. But somethings off…I’ve been here long enough to read Mikey’s face like a book. He looks nervous, like he wants something nervous… fear started to creep within me, what did he want now?
Usually he brings stuff in like crafts or food and water, but this time, it’s just him. Closing the door behind him, he speaks. “Hi my Angel…” a grimace grew on my face. That nickname used to make me swoon, but now it makes me want to throw up. “I have a very important question to ask you”
This was the question that ruined my life…and I thought it couldn’t get any worse… he wanted me…ME. To… just the thought is making me gag- EAT HIM. LITERALLY. The thoughts in my head started swarming me, his justifications and explanations fall on deaf ears as the room swirls around me. He gently grabs my forearms snapping me back, since when did I start crying? I can’t even breath right, I feel like I’m drowning.
“Listen, I know it sounds really really REALLY crazy, but I need you to trust me… you’ll be okay. This will be good for us! We’ll be together all the time isn’t that great?” No, it’s not great, far from it actually. “I won’t force you to do it now of course, take your time, I’ll wait, I’ll always wait for you”
Ever since then, no matter how much I stalled, it was only putting off the inevitable. No matter what I did, it never swayed him. Actually, it did, but not how I would’ve wanted. He started giving me less and less to eat. It started off small with a few less portions, but I never noticed the twitch in his smile whenever I put down his encouragement to chomp on his arm. He started giving less portions and no breakfast anymore, id be lucky if he gave me dinner.
Im hungry, starving even. It hurts, it hurts so so much. He would always come in more often, lifting his arm and encouraging me to bite. “Come on, you can do it baby”. It pisses me off. How dare you kidnap me after I gave you my trust. How dare you put me in a cramped tiny room, having to solely rely on you for everything. HOW DARE YOU force me to break EVERYTHING I thought was RIGHT all while you look at me and TELL ME YOU LOVE ME.
.
.
.
I hate you. I failed to notice hot tears running down my face. I hate you. I also failed to notice how hard I shook, how my teeth grinding against each other until it hurt. FUCKING I HATE YOU
Red, it’s all I can see. I used laughing when any character in media say they saw red, can you blame me? It sounds so…dumb, but I get it now. I understand, how ironic. Apparently, I could..taste red too…
Snapping back to reality a brick of drowsiness crashes down onto me, I must’ve had some high adrenaline because my jaw started hurting like a bitch. Liquid runs down my jaw, it’s warm..fresh. Why do I feel something on my tongue-
Shock slaps me in the face, my eyes go as wide as saucers, what have I done?? Looking up at Mikey I see the sheer amount of euphoria in his face, his eyes holding so much love, it might spill out. I need this thing out of me, I need HIM out. I gag trying to spit it out but he quickly puts his hand on my mouth. “you can do it, swallow quickly, it’ll all be over, your doing amazing” I don’t even think before swallow the lump down. The worst part about this whole experience was feeling the lump of meat slide down my throat and plop into my stomach. My mouth instantly starts salivating, and I’m forced to question if it’s because of the hunger still in me or the sheer amount of disgust and horror in me trying to throw it up while Mikey whispers sweet nothings in my ear.
Everything is too much. The air is too hot, too heavy, too wet. It feels horrible on my skin. It’s too noisy, to crowded, too much. Mikey only hugs me tight to his chest, his arm still bleeding , all while I lean in considering how it’s the only comfort I’ll get out of this hell hole. “I knew you’d trust me…I love you.. so so sooo much. I’ll never leave your side. We’re bound together as one, isn’t that great?”
All I could do was sob violently, slowly passing out, everything slowly fading to black.
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readyplayerhobi · 1 year ago
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Because, I Love You | 12
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; Genre: Fluff, angst
; Word Count: 5.1k
; Warnings: Fatphobia, ageism, mentions of miscarriage
; Synopsis: According to society, Jeon Jungkook should not be with you. He should   be with a younger, hotter and thinner girl instead of wasting his time   on you. It’s a good thing Jungkook doesn’t care what society thinks   then.
; A/N: Soo...you’ve been waiting for this one for like...a week now. And it’s here...the reason why Jungkook disowns his own mum! If you enjoyed this, please reblog so it can get on other people’s screens and I’d love to hear your thoughts in a comment or an ask - either one is great for me and let’s me know you like this fic still! Your feedback keeps encouraging me to write after all this time.
; Masterlist
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"You're totally gonna cry." Jimin teases, though he sounds happy and not malicious. His words are lightened even more by the broad grin he's wearing as he smoothes out Jungkook's lapel once more.
"Fuck yeah, I am. I cry at anything, seeing the love of my life in her wedding dress walking down the aisle towards me? If I'm not blubbing like a two-year-old who's had candy taken from them then punch me till I am." Jungkook is rambling, and he can tell. But he's so damn nervous and excited. Nervited. Excous. Whole new words.
Junghyun, his older brother, laughs loudly and pats Jungkook on the shoulder. Well, it feels more like he's punching him but Jungkook will just consider it a pat as it's done in good faith. Jimin was his best man, but Junghyun had agreed to be a groomsman.
The two of you had decided on a smaller wedding, to save money and make it more intimate. So you only had two bridesmaids and two groomsmen. Momo, your best friend who'd moved back in the last year, was your maid of honour while Hana, another close friend, was a bridesmaid. Thankfully, your friends had been understanding as to why they weren't all invited to be in the bridal party - because Jungkook wanted his brother and best friend, so logically you needed two to match - and were now sitting comfortably in the chairs that had been placed out for the day.
You'd also decided that you didn't want your bridesmaids to walk down the aisle, do they were already waiting for you. The whole day was planned to be simple, fun and intimate. You'd both chosen a beautiful hotel as your venue and were marrying in the gardens, with the dinner and reception later to be half in the other part of the gardens and the hall that had been rented.
Chewing on his lip ring, he looks towards the door that'll you'll be coming through for perhaps the millionth time and he jumps on the spot for a moment. He's got too many feelings, too much energy. He just wants you to turn up so he can marry you.
"Calm down, you're gonna be napping like a toddler if you keep moving around." Jimin chuckles, pressing down on Jungkook's shoulders to get the younger man to stop moving. It works to stop him from hopping, but his fingers are tapping on his thigh instead now.
"He doesn't need to move to nap, you know that." Junghyun snorts in amusement, but it's cut short by the sudden start of the music.
For a second, it doesn't register in Jungkook's head but then he realises - it's your music, the music for you to walk down the aisle.
"She's coming!" He squeaks, and if he didn't have a million thoughts in his head then he'd be embarrassed at how pitched his voice had gone. But he couldn't care now, not when you were coming! 
The music soars, and he recognises it as from your favourite video game. You hadn't let him hear it beforehand, had just let him know that he'll recognise it and…he did. It makes him laugh it registers.
You really picked An End Once And For All from the Mass Effect 3 soundtrack. It was your favourite game, and he knew that some would be a little confused at the unusual choice but he loved it. You'd opted for it to be played solely on piano, and he eyes the piano player for a second.
Great, now he was going to forever cry when he heard this song.
The door opens and it's like time stands still for a moment. You're standing there on your own for a moment, having decided that you were a modern woman and didn't want anyone to walk you down the aisle. The bouquet in your hands is held tightly, a deep purple ribbon that matches the colour scheme of the wedding trailing down.
Slowly, you start to walk towards him, passing row after row of your friends and family. Your dress is beautiful - folds of soft ivory silk with delicate lace patterns overlaying it, the lace trailing up over your bodice and shoulders before twirling down your arms. Each movement has the dress kicking out slightly, and he notes the tiny glimmers of crystals that have been carefully woven into the material. 
If an angel got married, Jungkook is pretty sure she'd look like you.
Finally, you're standing next to him as you hand off your bouquet to Momo and smile brightly at him. He tries to smile back, but he's been crying so damn hard that all he manages is for his lips to quiver pathetically. Sniffling, he wipes at his eyes frantically.
"Sorry," He mumbles, "You're so beautiful, I love you."
That sets him off again, and you laugh softly before reaching up to wipe away his tears. You're looking at him so fondly, he can't even bring himself to care that he's currently bawling his eyes out. At least Jimin doesn't need to hit him.
"I love you, too." Gently, you clean his face while quiet snickers rumble through the guests at his crying. Nothing malicious, just amused and cooing over how soft he is for you.
"Are you both ready?" The officiant asks, raising a brow at you both as he tries to hide his smile. Jungkook guesses he must see this all the time, and surely it's a good sign for a wedding if the guy cries, right?
Both of you nod at him, and Jungkook takes your hand and squeezes. He's actually getting married, he's going to have a wife in a few minutes. You're going to be his wife.
"Good afternoon, everyone. I hope everyone's excited for today, which sees us witnessing the union of Mr Jeon and Miss Y/L/N for love." Jungkook zones out as the officiant gets through the legal talk and starts to say something about the love between the two in front of him. Ironic, given Jungkook only met the guy yesterday.
But he's too busy staring at you in simultaneous amazement and love. You're here, you're marrying him. You'll be Mrs Jeon, his wife. You're so damn beautiful.
"If there is any person here present who knows of any lawful impediment to this marriage, then they should declare it now."
He's busy smiling at you, so busy that he doesn't even register the words spoken out loud. Not until he notices the way the space has become quiet, the silence deafening suddenly.
Frowning, he looks at the officiant who looks both shocked and confused. Then he looks at you, who mirrors the emotions, though there's also some horror in there too.
Finally, his brain catches up and he twists to stare at his mom. His mom, who had never liked you and who had pitched a fit when he'd announced his wedding. His mom, who had sworn she wouldn't come, only to turn up here anyway.
"What?" Jungkook asks, the confusion in his voice making him sound more like a child. This is what he feels because he can't understand why his mom is objecting. 
"I said, I object. I don't approve of my son marrying some old, fat woman. I've never approved of her, and I've tried repeatedly to bring him back but she's got her claws so deep into him. I don't want my son to marry a woman six years older than him, who's probably too old and fat to have children now. Not when my Jungkook deserves so much better. You should be marrying a doctor or a lawyer, not her. So I object, I don't want her in my family and I will never accept her as a daughter-in-law." His mom finishes her tirade, her cheeks red with anger and her face twisted with bitterness. He doesn't recognise her.
Jungkook was frozen in place, his eyes wide and jaw dropped as his mind blanked out. What had just happened? He didn't understand, he couldn't understand - this kind of stuff didn't happen in real life, right?
Yet here he stood, holding your hand tighter than he meant to as he stared in disbelief at his mom. The woman who'd raised him with so much love and affection, who was now unrecognisable to him. He wasn't the only one, his dad was also staring at her in horror whilst his grandparents looked shocked. And that was nothing compared to everyone else.
Jungkook was pretty sure that your parents were going to punch his mom, and frankly, he would let them. But that wasn't the important bit right now.
Turning to you, the love of his life wearing the most beautiful ivory dress and ready to legally tie yourself to him, he felt his heart break. Tears were banked in your eyes, and he saw the slightest quiver to your lips, the movement replicated by your fingers clasped in his own.
No, no. 
"Is there somewhere we can go for a few minutes? This won't affect anything, right? I just…I need to sort this out and I don't want Y/N to hear." He whispered to the officiant, who looked like he'd never seen this happen at a wedding before. Just what Jungkook wanted, for his wedding to be a fucking Reddit worthy story.
Still, the officiant nodded and reached out for you, carefully taking your hands from Jungkook. There's a brief moment where you fight, but Jungkook begs you quietly to go, that he'll be there as soon as he can and that he loves you, and most importantly…that he's so sorry.
Once you've disappeared through a door back into the hotel, he rounds with fury in his eyes. And god, he wishes he didn't cry when he was angry.
"What. The. Fuck." He spits, storming to the front row of his seats where his mom looks victorious and his dad looks sorrowful. It's only when she takes in the anger that practically vibrates in his body that she pauses. She loops her arm through his dad's for support, but his dad lets go and steps away with contempt in his eyes.
"I don't know why you're so surprised. You've known I don't approve of her for years now, and I've always let you know. You deserve so much better, someone who will give you beautiful babies and be on your level." There's a shout from your side that gets muffled quickly, and Jungkook notes that your mom is currently being dragged to the door you'd exited by your family. He wants to apologise, but he has to sort this out.
"Shut up, just SHUT UP. Why are you so fucking bitter? Y/N is perfect for me, I love her so much and you have no right to have any opinion here. None. It's my life, not yours. Fuck, I didn't even want you here. You're only here because Y/N wanted to give you another chance and you…you fucking…" He cracks then, swallowing hard as he finally starts to cry from embarrassment and hurt for you. 
Turning away for a moment, he presses his hand to his mouth hard as tears fall and he looks up at the beautiful sky. She'd made you cry, at your wedding ceremony. She'd insulted you on things that he knew you'd worked hard to overcome, yet deep inside you were still insecure about. In front of all your friends and family, along with his.
Letting out a shaky breath, he turns back around and lets his mom see his absolute devastation. She had no idea what you'd had to work through to learn to love yourself, or the way you'd made yourself vulnerable to him when letting him love you. She had no idea about the pain of the struggles you'd had to get pregnant or the fact that you'd now had two miscarriages. There was so much she didn't know because he'd known that she'd use it to hurt you. Yet she'd managed to use it anyway.
"Get out. I want you out." He says, his voice shaking and quiet but the words are like gunshots. His mom's eyes widen in shock, and he realises that she's genuinely surprised he's taken a stand. In her fantasy world, she'd speak her peace and he'd realise he was wrong and come back to the fold.
It makes him angry and he grits his teeth.
"Get. Out. Leave, go. I don't want you here, I don't fucking want you anywhere. This is it, I'm done. You want me to pick? Fine, I pick her. Get out of my wedding." He spits, pointing to the door that'll take her out of the wedding, and in a just world out of his life.
"Jungkook, you can't mean tha-"
"GET OUT. Dad, please. I can't…please." He begs his dad, knowing that his dad has always been kind to you and has tried to be the barrier between his mom and her horrible views. There's a second of hesitation before his dad nods, grasping his wife's arms firmly. She's started to rant at them both, jerking to get herself free.
Before he manages to push her into the aisle, his dad stops and gives him a tight smile.
"I'm so sorry, I really am. Please let Y/N know I'm so sorry about this, I think she'll be a great daughter-in-law to me." His compassionate words make Jungkook smile weakly as he nods, before moving to stand in front of everyone.
There's still shock and uncertainty on everyone's faces and he feels so embarrassed, so humiliated that they've all witnessed this. He can't even imagine how you feel.
"I'm sorry you've all had to see that. I, erm, I'm gonna go see Y/N…I don't know if the wedding will carry on. I don't know…it's up to Y/N. I'm sorry." He doesn't know what to say, and he hates how lost he feels.
"Tell her we're sorry too, and that we'd still love to see you both get married if she wants." Jimin says, his best man resting a hand on his shoulder and squeezing reassuringly. There are murmurs of agreement from the crowd, and Jungkook wants to cry from the reassurance everyone gives.
Instead, he nods his head and hurries after you. He'd have been confused as to where you'd been taken if it wasn't for your dad standing outside another door. Jungkook feels about 10cm tall as he walks up to him, his shoulders hunching up to his ears as shame flushes through him. It wouldn't surprise him if your dad hit him, even if it had been his mom who'd said everything.
Stopping in front of him, Jungkook opens his mouth to apologise but he's cut off by strong arms pulling him into a hug. It's a little awkward, with Jungkook's hands dangling uselessly.
"I'm sorry." Your dad says, his tone full of compassion and it confuses him.
"Why are you apologising? I should be, I'm so sorry you had to hear that…I-I don't know what," Looking down, he frowns in frustration. "I've kicked her out…of my life too, hopefully."
"It's not your fault, a child isn't responsible for what their parents say, okay? You love my daughter, I know that. She's in with her mum," He states, nodding his head to the door. "I'm sorry this happened, you don't deserve it."
Jungkook's throat tightens, and all he can do is nod before going through the door. It's a small receiving room inside, with a fancy-looking couch taking up most of the space. He doesn't even understand the purpose of this room, but he doesn't care. Not when you're sat on the couch, your dress splayed out around you with your mom sitting beside you, her arm around your shoulders.
His heart breaks again when he sees the tears on your face, and he feels like shouting in anger at his mom once more. But he doesn't, because this isn't about her.
Glancing at your mom, he notes the upset and pain in her eyes and gives her a tiny smile. She stands, moving over and hugging him as well.
"I'm sorry about all this." He can tell there's more she wants to say, but she restrains herself with a glance back at you. Once she's left the room, Jungkook moves over to you and frowns, pressing his lips together before crouching next to you.
You stare blankly at your hands, tear after tear following well-laid tracks down your face. He knew that you'd opted for waterproof makeup, but even that wasn't able to keep up with the amount you were crying. Not to mention whenever you wiped them away.
"Y/N…" He whispered, feeling useless. It was his mom, and he hadn't seen you cry like this before. You'd cried in pain at the loss of your babies twice now, you'd cried at the fact that a year of passively trying had yielded only one miscarriage and nothing else, you'd occasionally cried when you'd got so overwhelmed from stress but never like this.
Never the quiet and defeated way you were crying now, the slump to your shoulders and the pained look in your eyes breaking his heart. He hated that he couldn't fix this immediately.
Kneeling on the floor - he didn't care if he got his rented tuxedo dirty - he reaches out and takes your hand. Your engagement ring is on your right hand for today, waiting for the wedding band that would be placed onto your left ring finger before joining it once more.
"I'm so sorry." He goes to say something else but surprises himself by breaking down. It annoys him that he's crying when you're the one who suffered such horrible insults, but his heart is aching for you and he's so confused and upset.
Pressing his face into the soft fabric of your dress, he lets out a quiet sob.
"Don't cry, please don't cry." You whisper, running your fingers through his hair in that soothing way he loves. He should be comforting you, and he feels annoyed at himself like he's letting his mom win by letting you baby him and comfort him.
"I should've known, I should've pushed back on inviting her. She's never gonna change, she's just so bitter and cruel. She's not the mom I knew." Jungkook says, sniffling as he looks up at you. At the woman he loves so much, he didn't even know it was possible to love like this.
"Maybe she's right," You whisper, your voice so thin and broken, and he doesn't get a chance to refute before you continue speaking. "I love you, and I've never loved someone so much but…I've never really felt worthy of you. I try to push those thoughts aside, but…you know what it's like. When those negative thoughts get in your head and it wiggles in. Sometimes I just look at you and wonder why you're here…why me? You're younger and ridiculously good-looking and in shape, with plenty of money and you're so damn kind and fun. Why me? I never really understood and you always showered me with love so I just ignored it but…everything she said is something I've already hurt myself with by saying before."
He stares at you in horror, and hatred for his mom swirls in his gut. All the shit she'd spouted had been stuff he'd heard before, and he knew that you'd asked yourself it sometimes. You'd even asked him outright on occasion, but hearing the defeated way you agree with his mom leaves him heartbroken.
"No, no don't listen to her. She's just a bitter and hateful woman because she can't control her son anymore and that I won't follow the life she thought I'd have. I don't care about what she said, she's wrong. You're the best thing to happen to me." He pleads, and he genuinely doesn't know how to resolve this. Fighting negative thoughts is a battle that many lose, and he's terrified that you're being forced to confront such awful ones on what should've been such a happy day.
"What if she is right? I mean…I'm already struggling to give you a baby and the problem is more likely to be me than you. You're young and in great shape, whereas I'm older and overweight. What if we can never have kids and it's all because of me? And she's right that you could be with someone younger and prettier, you get hit on all the time and like…what if one of those girls is who you're meant to be with? What if they could give you a baby immediately? You're so…perfect, and I'm not. I know that. People don't think I'm pretty, I'm fat, I don't like wearing makeup, I'm opinionated, I'm older than you, I don't shave all the time-" 
"Stop, stop, please stop," Jungkook begs, his voice breaking as tears fall so fast. "I don't care what my mom thinks, I don't. And I know that's a luxury you can't have, but please…stop telling me what I should think. I don't care what other people think, and I don't want you to put their opinions onto me. I love you, I love everything about you and I love all the bits you don't love. I think you're beautiful, and I genuinely don't care about your weight. If I did, I would've said something or just never approached you. I love that you have opinions and you're willing to say them, it's hot as fuck to me. I love that you're confident enough in yourself to not wear makeup and shave all the time, it doesn't bother me. I've always said that I love the confidence that you have that comes from being older, that you have your life put together and don't have to rely on me,"
"I love your smile, I love your hands, I love your face, I love your laugh, I love your jokes, I love you. And what if I'm the problem? What if I have slow swimmers, or not enough? What if they're weak? Maybe a younger girl would get pregnant instantly, but I don't want that. I want you. If I'm gonna have a baby, then I want it with you. If we never have babies, then as long I'm with you, then it's fine. I love you, and it's killing me that you have these thoughts and you're having to have them on today of all days. Today should be happy, and I'm so sorry that it's not. Please…believe me. I love you." He begs, kissing your fingers as if he's trying to press his feelings into you by force.
Silence falls, and he gets the sense that it's not a negative kind of quiet, but more a contemplative one as you think through what he's said. Being on his knees and begging you to believe his love wasn't what he expected on his wedding day, but then he also hadn't ever expected his mom to show how ugly she is.
Finally, you shift your hands in his until you can cup his cheek. Immediately, he presses into your touch like a sun-starved flower meeting the morning rays of light. He doesn't notice the small smile you give him, doesn't even realise he's closed his eyes at your touch until he hears the sharp exhale of your laugh.
Looking up at you - your dress looks even more beautiful on you this close - he takes in the way your tears have slowed. Taking in a deep breath, a little shakier than it would've been at any other time, you lean forward and lightly kiss him on the forehead.
Before he can even say anything, you're already rubbing away the lipstick mark that had been left and he feels hope spark in his chest once more. You've both been through a lot, and you've done it together. This was just another obstacle, right?
"You're such a good man, Jungkook." You murmur, opening your arms slightly in invitation. He takes it immediately, rising to sit on the couch next to you. A yelp of surprise leaves you as he carefully lifts you onto his lap, a grunt leaving him with the effort and he feels fear flash through him. What if you thought he thought you were too heavy with that noise?
But you giggle, and the noise soothes his worries. 
Wrapping his arms around your waist, Jungkook hugs you as tightly as he can without ruining your dress and presses his head into the space between your neck and shoulder. Breathing in deeply, he takes in the soft scent of your favourite perfume and the lingering smell of your peach body wash, all with the unique smell underneath it all that was just you. 
"I'm not that good. You do complain at me for leaving the empty milk cartons in the fridge, and for not cleaning the sink after I brush my teeth, and for always eating the chips that you wanted, and-" You cut him off with a laugh, kissing him as he smiles at you happily.
"Shut up, you know what I meant." Jungkook grins before nodding, kissing your cheek and making a face at the gross taste of the makeup on it. He doesn't say anything, though, but he notes the way you smile and wipe his lips clean.
"I know, and I don't want you to like…idolise me. But I also don't want you to listen to my asshole of a mom. I kicked her out, by the way. My dad said sorry, I can imagine there's gonna be a big ass fight when they get home and I'm glad. She needs some reality." Pursing his lips, he half wishes he could see his mom get put in her place. At least, he hopes his dad does that.
"He doesn't need to apologise, it's not his fault. Same as it's not your fault." You muse, your gaze lifting before you begin to clean up his hair. He can only assume it's looking a bit rough right now, what with how much he was pulling it outside.
"Will you believe that, too?"
"Why wouldn't I? I invited her to try and build bridges between us both, but she's made her feelings clear. It annoys me that she's made me cry and humiliated us both, but that was what she wanted. So…I'm not over it, I'm definitely not over it. I still want to run away and curl up and cry. I've no doubt that I'm gonna have some depressive relapses now, which I'm totally looking forward to, but her need to be cruel is not my fault, or your fault, or your dad's." Jungkook wonders if it would be too much to fall to his knees and worship you right now.
He's always known that you were level-headed and confident, it was one of the reasons he fell for you. The age difference that sometimes worries you has let you wrangle your inner demons and learn to understand and love yourself, so it doesn't surprise him that you're bouncing back so quickly. It also isn't a shock that you're so pragmatic about your mental health, though he's fully prepared for the tears that will come.
But this level of reasoning, after such a shocking event, is surprising even to him. Your wedding was interrupted by his mom, who proceeded to personally insult you in front of those you love and here you are…less than half an hour later and already laughing with him.
God, if he hadn't loved you before…
"You're amazing, you know that?" Jungkook laughs, leaning back slightly and just marvelling at you. Your makeup is a little ruined, and your dress isn't nearly as neat and pristine as it had been, yet you've never been more beautiful to him.
"Is everyone still out there?" You ask, and he hears the soft tremor you try to keep out. As resilient as you are, you're still a person with feelings at the end of the day, and even he feels uncertain at the thought of going back out to friends and family who will be concerned and shocked.
"Yeah, they are. Or should be. I mean, it's up to you but…they've said they'd love to still see us get married. It's why they're all here, and they're not assholes like my mom. But if you don't feel up to it then…we could do the vows in here, or something? Or…well, we could postpone it, if you wanted." He really, really doesn't want to postpone it. Jungkook had woken up this morning excited to marry you, and the thought of going to bed without your ring on his finger made him feel sad.
Pushing up from his lap, you move over to the door and cross your arms whilst an outraged look paints your face.
"Are you kidding? I'm not postponing our wedding, not unless you want to. Your mom is a bitch, but not even she can make me willing to lose the thousands we've spent on this day. Plus, I really wanna marry you. We're not letting her win, okay? Fuck her." Lifting your chin, you get a distinctly obstinate look on your face and he can't help but laugh.
"Yeah, fuck her. I'll tell everyone and sort it out with the officiant. Do you want me to send Momo in, there's no mirror if you're wanting to touch up or anything." He asks, referring to your best friend and maid of honour who had recently moved closer. While your mascara and eyeliner have done a valiant job of holding up, it's still pretty obvious you've been crying and Jungkook doesn't know enough about makeup to help you fix it up.
Taking a deep breath for stability, you nod and smile at him.
"Yes, please. Give us five minutes or so, and say sorry to the officiant for me, too?"
Moving over to you, Jungkook grins and lightly cups your face in his hands. You smile back at him, and he knows that you'll probably both need to go through some therapy after today but taking control again feels good. Plus, as you said - he wasn't going to let his mom win.
"I love you." He states, before giving you a quick kiss.
"Love you, too. Let everyone know that if someone else does something to ruin today, then I will punch them. And I don't care if I don't know how to hit properly, I've reached the limit of shit I'll take today."
"It's okay, I do know how to hit properly so I'll do it for you."
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eetherealgoddess · 10 months ago
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Hi! I love the way you write Kazutora and I'd like to request this specific brain rot I've been having about a female reader getting mugged by him and accidentally dropping and shattering her phone before she can give it to him, so he forces her to make up for the time and money he just lost, if at all possible with ar knife or gunpoint :)
Can’t believe I never thought of this even though I think of pervert Kazutora all the time. Also I think you meant noncon by “forcing her to make up for time and money,” so that’s what I wrote. Hope you enjoy!!♡︎♡︎♡︎
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ꨄHow to Survive a Mugging ꨄ
Oneshot - Slight Yandere Mugging Au
Hanemiya Kazutora x Reader
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Not fully proofread
MY TR FANDOM WORKS ARE ONLY ON TUMBLR, AO3, AND WATTPAD UNDER EETHEREALGODDESS! REPORT IF YOU SEE IT POSTED UNDER ANYONE ELSE BUT ME!!!
I apologize if I get any Japanese etiquette or culture wrong, I literally have to research the culture for some of my fandom stories so if anything is wrong, please excuse my ignorance.
Notice:
✩Y/n is 18+. I picture her as a black female but you can see her however.
✩Some parts of the story may not be realistic or factual. After all, this is a work of fiction.
✩Although it's a dark 'romance,' I do not condone any of the behavior displayed.
✩Dark content such as: gore, violence, triggering topics, graphic scenes, vulgar language, explicit sexual content, etc.
✩There may be scenes that involve non con and/ or dubcon so don’t read if that makes you uncomfortable
✩That being said, this story is for 18+ only.
Enjoy!
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How to Survive a Mugging
Your hand trembles as you attempt to pull your phone out of your leggings’ pocket while the knife is held against your throat from behind. You had just been going for a walk, something you haven’t done in a while. You had walked for at least an hour in total, ready to go back home for the day. Deciding to make a shortcut, you went through an alleyway so you didn’t have to walk back in the same long direction you took from the beginning. Unfortunately, cutting through an alley was one of the biggest mistakes you had ever made.
The arm wrapped around your waist tightens as you fidget in the stranger’s grip, the breath on your ear intimidating as the sharp object is held against your neck. You hadn’t brought your purse so you left your wallet at home. Considering you had no money on you, the only thing you could give the mystery man was your phone, something you hadn’t wanted to give. So when you grabbed it you purposefully dropped it to make it look like an accident.
“Shit!” He hissed against your ear.
“I-I’m sorry! I’m just really scared!” You cry out as he turns you around and shoves you against the wall. You stare in shock at the beauty on the man’s face, as well as his hair that is messily pulled back. His expression holds a stoic expression as the knife is against your throat once more, his other hand planted on the wall beside your head. You could only eye him with discomfort as you glance at your shattered phone. Fortunately, you’ll be able to transfer whatever you need into a new phone, content with not having given it to the stranger. Your eyebrows furrow when a smirk forms on his face.
“You did that on purpose.” His eyes shift to your chest before they run down your figure. He makes eye contact with you before he releases a chuckle.
“You’ve wasted my time. I should kill you.” His smile drops, giving you a cold look as the knife touches your skin. You flinch as you swallow against the cold object. You could already see from where he had used it on someone else, the dry blood that stained it prominent. Your heart pounds against your chest as your fingers fidget against your palms.
You thought about fighting back but you had no clue how to. You were terrified and ashamed at how weak you are as an adult woman. You knew the dangers yet you’ve been too lazy to learn how to fight or at least have the resources to take a few classes. You thought about pushing him away, though you run the risk of your neck getting sliced, so you stay in place.
He pulls back from you slightly as the smile grows on his face. He drops the knife to his side as he stares at you, his tattoo prominent against his neck.
“Wanna make it up to me?” He teases, a thumb caressing your cheek as his palm rests against your cheek. You don’t respond, seeing where he’s going with the statement.
“Get on your knees.” You shake your head.
“Please don’t make me do this!” He only chuckles as a hand meets your shoulder.
“Your begging only makes me want it more. Knees.” He demands with a close eyed smile. You had no choice but to comply.
“Pull it out.” You angrily unzip his pants as well as yank them down, tears threatening to fall in humiliation. He grabs your hand with the hand that isn’t holding the knife.
“Woah there, relax.” He chuckles. “I’ll slice your hand off if you’re too rough.”
You remove the erection from his underwear. A hand on your chin forces you to look up.
“Treat it like it’s yours, yeah? Any teeth and you’re dead. Understand?” You glare at him while nodding your head.
Leaning in, you drag your tongue along the mushroom top, circling it as you taste his precum. His hand rests on your head as he bites his lip. You ease his head in as you suckle the tip, him eyeing the lips surrounding his cock.
“Fuck.” He whispers under his breath, slightly thrusting his hips forward to ease the rest of his cock in, your lips meeting the base as he moans. He pulls your head back until the tip is at the edge of your lips before pulling you back to his base. His mouth is slightly parted with a red hue on his face, orbs eyeing you under heavy lids.
“Look at me.” You comply as you bob your head back and forth, accelerating your speed as you give your all in an attempt to finish him off fast. The squelching sound echoes through the alleyway, a mixture of saliva and cum dripping from your mouth as you take him into your throat. Your hands grip his thighs as he thrusts into your mouth. His head falls back before he thrusts harder, bringing his attention back on you when he looks down.
“Yeah, just like that baby. Take this dick.” He whispers as his hand grips your head. Your eyes shut as his thrusts become overwhelming. Fingers pinch your nostrils as your eyes shoot back open.
“I’ll fucking smother you with my cock if you don’t look at me.” He chuckles with a dazed expression. “If you wanna breathe, you better listen.” He says before releasing your nose and placing his hand back on your head. Tears stream down your face as his grip tightens, fucking your mouth harder as his hips thrust against your face. Moans leave his mouth as his body tenses, golden eyes narrowed at your own orbs.
Your nails piercing into the skin of his thighs causes him to groan louder, the sting mixing well with the warmth around his cock.
“M’ gonna cum.” He mutters before shoving his cock into your mouth, holding it in place as semen shoots down your throat causing you to swallow it all. You grunt as you try to breathe normally again once he releases your head and pulls his cock out of your mouth. He demands you to put his pants back on, watching you with amusement. He leans over, the tip of his knife poking your chin forcing you to look up at him.
“You’re my new cockslut. Let’s get your phone fixed since we’ll need that to talk.” You look at him with confusion.
“I-I thought you were gonna let me go.”
“I never said that.” He puts his knife away. “Let’s go.” He grabs your wrist, forcing you to get up from the ground.
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slocumjoe · 2 years ago
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A ramble about Preston Garvey and a self-indulgent revision of the entire Minuteman questline
TDLR: The Minutemen faction sacrifices writing and Preston’s character as a means of shoveling errands and busywork at the player.
Preston’s issues as a character are entirely Doylist, meaning the fault of outside forces. His writing, his concept, his themes, those are solid. This is not a racehorse that broke its leg and was still sent down the track, like some characters. This is a horse that was hale and hearty, but they made it run in circles around cars in the parking lot instead of putting it in the race. 
This essay is not going to be my most coherent one. Preston’s issues are so apparent, so in your face, it kinda feels like a waste of time explaining it. Just look at him and anyone with two braincells to rub together can see. But a lot of things in Fallout 4 sticks with me, even when I’m not in a Fallout 4 mood. Preston is one of those things. So neglected, so misused in the game, I couldn’t stop thinking about the bastard. 
Before we get into what Preston is, in-game...what was he meant to be?
And you know what? 
He’s close to Danse, post Blind Betrayal.
Preston Garvey started his military career as a fresh-faced, bright-eyed young man, who wanted to be another gun protecting the Commonwealth against whatever would harm it. He always had his faction’s best interests and ideals in mind. The first to wave the flag, the first to say the motto, the first to pick up a gun for it. He didn’t want heroism, or glory. He wanted to make the world a better place. It sounds cookie cutter, cliche, so sugary-saccharine. But this is the wasteland. This is in a world where everyone else seems content to succumb to futilism, to pretend there is no Better for the world. 
Preston Garvey is, inherently, part of a rebel army. The Minutemen were a militia, a guerilla army of farmers and their children, banding together against the oppressive totality of raiders, mercenaries, anyone who would rather gnaw on bones than build to ensure everyone was taken care of. The Minutemen are the fuck you, we want to recover and heal faction, to the raiders’ fuck you, I have a right to wallow in the ruins.
The legend herself, the icon, the Queen, Ursula K. LeGuin once said;  “The trouble is that we have a bad habit, encouraged by pedants and sophisticates, of considering happiness as something rather stupid. Only pain is intellectual, only evil interesting. This is the treason of the artist; a refusal to admit the banality of evil and the terrible boredom of pain.” The MInutemen might look like your average, boring heroes (we’ll get into why), but it is inherently badass to look at the literal End of the World and decide, no, actually, we don’t want to lie down and die.
Preston Garvey is not a boy scout, the Minutemen are not mall cops. They are furious, determined, and most dangerously, optimistic. 
A young Preston Garvey joined under a blue banner, served under it for years...and watched as people who saw money, power, glory, took that banner and tied it into a noose.
Joe Becker died, and having not chosen someone to take over as General, all of the colonels squabbled for the position, wanting the fame, the cushy office. These people weren’t Minutemen, not at heart. The faction had grown so large, there was bound to be people looking only at the resources, what was in it for them. Preston, still a young man, but quickly losing his naivety and faith in his fellow Minutemen, watched as these colonels dropped their altruistic acts and demanded they get theirs.
And then Quincy happened.
The Minutemen were in disarray, following the Mirelurk invasion of the Castle, lacking a home base and their radio communications. But Colonel Ezra Hollis, potentially the last Colonel who gave a shit, heard that Quincy was under siege by Gunner forces, and he led his small, out-gunned squad to do whatever the fuck they could, until another Colonel came to provide the needed fire support. Hollis’ Minutemen succeeded in driving the Gunners back, and holding them off, but their help from Colonel Marbury never came. Preston watched as his Colonel refused to give up and let Quincy fall...and he watched as Clint, a ten-year veteran, betrayed everyone, chose money and a winning team over what was right. 
Quincy fell. Preston Garvey watched as the refugees fell in a line, running for safety. Watched his comrades, who he had been fighting against impossible odds with for days, dropped with them. 
Preston Garvey died, and I can tell you where. At one house, to the right, down the street from the museum, where the last other Minuteman lay dead in a yard. Where he became the Last Minuteman. Even if there were others who would call themselves such...they weren’t Minuteman, not really. The real Minutemen tried to save Quincy. Everyone else, who gave up, never believed at all.
Preston was still fucking furious at the hedonistic cruelty people indulged in and called inevitable. But he was alone, a failure, and had lost any reason to believe that there was a possibility of continuing. A point, a reason, yes. But the optimism...without that, there was no Minuteman army. 
Preston is Danse Post BB, because he’s freshly disillusioned from his faction, horrified at the truth and betrayal. He has lost his identity, his values, unsure of where to go, if there’s anywhere to go. And then...salvation walks down the street of Concord, and walks him and his group back up the road to Sanctuary. Sanctuary.
And then comes in the fucking dialogue system (FDS) and the fucking radiant system (FRS), armed with folding chairs, to beat Preston Garvey’s rich character into a bloody, twitching pulp. We cannot talk about Preston without talking about how his faction questline plays. We simply have to, because it’s like a shotgun wedding from hell.
Let’s start with the very first quest in the Minutemen. Preston, while running for his fucking life from gunners, then ferals, then raiders, has somehow heard through the grapevine/radio he doesn’t have that Tenpines has a Corvega raiders issue. He asks you to do it because he’s busy guarding Sanctuary. Okay.
You go to Tenpines, Corvega, and back, and whoop, you are now Minuteman general. 
You START THE MINUTEMEN as THE LEADER. Even fucking MAXSON waits for you to at least bump Danse off before making you a Paladin, but nope! Starting at the top, ending at the top. This kills progression in all senses. There is no sense of gaining ground, the Minutemen start with a General. Skyrim gets mocked for making you the leader of all factions, but good god, at least you had to earn it by sticking with them. 
So, bad start. 
Then you do some settlement stuff...which is handed to you in the worst fucking way. The FRS. 
Where is Preston getting this information? How are people sending it out? Ignoring the logistics...it’s just boring. You talk to Preston sometimes, and he always says Go Here, Do This, Come back. Do this enough times, Preston wants to retake the Castle. At this point, you don’t have any men, it’s just you and Preston- wait, who the fuck are these people?! We’ve had soldiers this whole time?! Who hired them?! You take the Castle and it’s admittedly cool, if not a pain to restore for all your- okay, wait, I can only bring settlers? Where are all the men I supposedly have, there’s three soldiers here! Three soldiers, this is just a Clearing the Way radiant quest, but the moving in folks helped me kill the mirelurks! 
Ugh, fine. You keep traveling, Preston gives you more- Preston?! I killed a Mirelurk Queen specifically for the radio tower, so I could get quests from the radio! Why is Preston still dispensing quests? It discourages you from talking to him, because you’ll get busywork cluttering your quest log. You can’t talk to Preston Garvey. You can’t fucking talk to him without doing him a favor first. 
Y’know what makes this even more abominable? You are said to have soldiers, who could be doing this instead! Why am I going after kidnapped settlers when we have soldiers?! The General still has a kid to find and the Institute to explode! SPEAKING OF...
The Commonwealth Provisional Government was started by the Minutemen, and ended by the Institute. This is never brought up again. And it’s not even Preston who talks about it, it’s Nick. The Minutemen have very real reason to want the Institute gone, and a good excuse to get the player to want to destroy the Institute beyond “grrr synths/they took my baby.”
Anyway, you go get artillery from Ronnie Shaw at some point, build it in your settlements, and...make your farmers man them. Not soldiers. I know you can deck out your settlers with armor and weapons, but the fact that you have maybe 5 constant, non-random encounter soldiers, all at the Castle, is...it makes it feel hollow. Where is my army, Preston? Who am I leading?
So, you do the Main Quest, blow up the Institute. Blah blah. Blow up the Brotherhood, too. Blaaaaah.
Either way, let’s get into fixes. And by fixes, I mean, complete rehaul.
First thing’s first. The entire questline is bad. It’s radiant quests and then boom boom Institute. It starts and ends the exact same way, you being the general. Second thing, we need to go back to the old dialogue system; no more YES, NO, WHAT, SARCASTIC. Actual dialogue. Back to Fallout New Vegas’s system, that relied on all stats and perks. Actual conversations with branching paths.
Saving Preston at Concord is fine. Works. It’s the first radiant quest that sucks ass. Throw that system out entirely, and I do mean entirely. Don’t save it for anything, it needs to go. It cannot remain. No being sent to Tenpines because Preston heard from a little birdie.
Instead, you work with Preston and the survivors to fortify and set up Sanctuary.
First, you work with Preston to shore up Sanctuary’s defenses. As you work with him, he’s polite, but curt. Professional, but not warm, open. He expresses gratitude, but definitely not trust. He doesn’t know you, he doesn’t know what your motives or wants are. You can tell him about Shaun, but he’s still not sure about you. He can’t afford to be and will tell you that outright, but...he needs someone to go see if anyone survived Lexington or Concord. He knows his other Minutemen split up with other survivors, he doesn’t know if they made it out. You can offer to go find them, or stay and protect Sanctuary. If you go, the other survivors will set up Sanctuary on their own without your help.
If you stay and Preston leaves, you plant crops with Marcy, getting to know her and potentially, she cracks and shows some vulnerability. She doesn’t soften right away, she’s still traumatized, but you get to see why she’s the way she is now. She just lost her baby, her home, all of her friends and family. Was just failed by the people who swore they’d protect them all. Betrayed by them. 
Then, you work with Sturges to get a water pump/purifier running. Sturges will tell you about Quincy in some detail, explain how it went to shit. He talks about how the Minutemen were needed more than ever, but crapped the bed at the last minute. Sturges says he thinks there’s a place in the world for the group, but with the last living soldier clearly reeling from everything that’s happened, he thinks it’s safe to say the Commonwealth is on it’s own. 
Next, it’s the bed situation with Jun. He barely says a word, only quietly thanking you for your help. If you choose the right dialogue options, he’ll say you remind him of Colonel Hollis, very brave and kind, even when it was a bad idea to help. Hollis didn’t survive, but you did. Maybe it’s not all bad, maybe Hollis wasn’t wrong, just of bad luck.
After, no matter who goes to find the bodies of the other Minutemen and Quincy locals, some Corvega raiders attack Sanctuary when they come back. It’s only a small scouting party, looking for Mama Murphy. You kill them, and Preston is freaking out and about to pack up and keep everyone moving farther. It’s up to you to calm him down and offer to go kill them. If you’ve picked certain dialogue choices before and Sanctuary has a high defense score, Preston will join you on the trip to Corvega. It’s on this journey + throughout it you can tell him about the fate of his comrades, or he tells you. If he doesn’t accompany you, you two talk about it when you get back to Sanctuary after killing Jared. 
Either way, It’s here that Mama Murphy tells you about Diamond City, not in the museum.
You do the main quest now, and when you get to Diamond City, you overhear people talking about the Quincy massacre, and what a shame that the Minutemen are gone. Someone talks about how McDonough forced all the ghouls out, and they moved up to the Slog, but now the Slog is having mutant troubles. From there, you can go decide for yourself if you want to do the Minuteman questline. The first few quests were just to organically show you the settlement system, dialogue system (the old, good one), and dungeon crawling, the explore-loot-return loop. It’s here that the Minutemen branch off from the main quest.
If you choose to save the Slog, you have the option of saying you’re there on Minuteman business, even if you’re not a Minuteman. Choosing this is what gets you in the faction proper. 
You can keep finding settlements and offering help. Doing this, Preston eventually catches word through Diamond City Radio and demands to know what the fuck you’re doing. You have a lot of options to choose from, but only the altruistic, optimistic ones will earn Preston’s trust. Anything else, he might just try to kill you, if you, like, say you’re doing it for money. But if you’re doing this for good reasons, he’s on board. Surprised, unsure this will end well, but...hey, if you want to try, he won’t stop you. If Sanctuary has enough settlers, defense, and you’ve turned enough settlers into guards (which have a different character tag, when assigned to defense posts), Preston will offer to accompany you, and that’s how you get him as a companion.
So, you and Preston wander around, doing quests, and helping out settlements. Help enough settlements, they’ll realize hey, we’re all on good terms with this Minuteman, and this person who’s basically a Minuteman...let’s just get the Minutemen back, yeah? People band together, settlements you’ve provided for will get settlers on their own. Eventually, people at settlements approach you and offer to help, what needs doing? If you have a settlement quest/errand, you can assign them to it, and they’ll complete it for you. This snow-balls until you’re taking over the Castle, for all these guns-for-hope to gather around and manage trade routes and work. You get the radio tower. You get an army. You get artillery, automatically built at every settlement in a designated spawnpoint.
It’s here that, by popular vote, you’re offered the position as General...but you can turn it down. You can hand it to Ronnie, or Preston. Both of of them agree, no, the people and the new Minutemen want you, but they’ll take it if you pass enough dialogue checks. Ronnie will run the Minutemen like a hardass, fierce and cynical to deter a second collapse, but Preston runs it like a community. He believes that cynicism was what killed the first Minutemen, and that constant reminder of who and what they do this for will keep motives pure. No matter the general, the Minutemen are now a solid force in the Commonwealth, stronger than ever, making everyone piss their pants. And it got this way because you wanted to help. 
It’s at this point that Preston’s conversation about his depression unlocks, and his romance. 
But the fun begins when the Gunners take a modicum of offense to all this.
Sanctuary is put to the sword, the Castle is attacked, and best of all, the old Colonels show their face, either on the side of the Gunners as bosses, or trying to weasel their way into the Minutemen again. Preston loves killing all of them, hates sparing or talking them down. These fuckers left him, Quincy, the Commonwealth to die, they are traitors, they are pure scum. 
The Minutemen, they fight back. You take squads into Gunner camps and clear house, take it over. People stop working with or hiring the Gunners because they don’t want to piss off the General, whoever that is. The Gunners aren’t on the ropes yet, but they’re staring down Minutemen barrels and it’s only a matter of time before this explodes into someone getting wiped off the face of the earth. 
Somewhere in-between looking for the Institute, you get kidnapped by Gunners and taken to Quincy. They’re using you as either a hostage, intending to kill you to prove a point, or torturing you for fun, taking the piss out of the idea that the puny militia could ever stand up to- hey, why am I hearing gunfire?
Preston and the Minutemen storm Quincy, putting it under a siege not even the Gunners could ever have hoped to accomplish. If the Minutemen were dog food, the Gunners are kitty treats. It’s a swift, brutal execution of every green-wearing bastard. They don’t even have time to prepare before Preston himself kicks the door down and frees you, then runs back out to continue bashing people’s heads in with his rifle. You meet up with Ronnie, and she points you down Preston’s warpath, gently asking if you can go stop before he gets himself killed trying to throttle Clint. As you chase him down, you see Clint up on the highway, looking down, before he walks away, presumably to meet Preston. 
You can go find Preston, kill Clint before he gets to him, or go kill Baker first. If Preston gets to Clint, you’ll hear him screaming bloody murder before they start the fight. They’ll fight until you go finish Clint off. Once Clint drops, Preston has something of a nervous breakdown. Ronnie and other Minutemen show up, she takes over and tells you to finish clearing Quincy with the other soldiers while she gets Preston out of the fight. You can listen to her, or insist you stay with Preston. If you stay, you clear the way for Ronnie’s group to get back behind Minutemen lines just outside of Quincy. Baker can be killed by NPC Minutemen, so you don’t have to worry about it too much.
The Minutemen have Quincy again, Preston is recovering from his panic attack, and Ronnie is foaming at the mouth at the idea of going at Gunner HQ. You can agree or disagree. If you’ve been killing the Colonels, Preston will think that the Gunners are in such bad shape, it’s only a matter of time before they kill themselves with infighting, just as the Minutemen did. If you’ve spared the Colonels, he’ll want to finish off the Gunners, as they’re still too organized and armed to leave alive. If Ronnie is General, the Minutemen attack Gunner HQ anyway, no matter what, but if not, the player can influence Preston or make the decision themselves.
Laying siege to Gunner HQ cements the Minutemen’s place as the strongest army in the Commonwealth. With this ending for the Minutemen, non-important/notable raider hideouts will be cleared automatically, either because soldiers killed them, or the Minutemen were so oppressive, they couldn't find anyone to raid. Other factions will speak more carefully to you, be gentler when describing their intentions. Maxson and other BOS soldiers, if you join them, will mention that being so close to the Castle was unintentional, and they’re nervous about the Minutemen turning their artillery on the Airport. You’ll have a harder time getting the Brotherhood to go to war with Minutemen in this ending. Everyone in game will acknowledge what the Minutemen become, through your efforts.
If you let the Gunners dissolve, you’ll see Gunners having left for raider groups, groups of them killing each other, Gunners trying to get in with the Minutemen. Those Gunners, if you’re general, you can take them on, kill them, or turn them away. General Ronnie will kill them, General Preston’s choice depends on if you have been more merciful, or grudge-holding. People will comment on the Gunners wasting away into little more than scavengers, and with enough time, if you go to Gunner HQ, you find it empty and abandoned. People are less scared of the Minutemen this ending, as they didn’t obliterate the most dangerous local  army in a show of total force and revenge. The Brotherhood is more likely to go to war with you, less intimidated, but the Railroad will offer their spy network if you agree to help them rehabilitate and save synths, provided you’ve spoken positively of synths.
Either ending, the Institute will try to destroy the Minutemen, as they destroyed the Commonwealth Provisional Government in the past. But now, the Minutemen have the firepower and intel to destroy the Institute, or take it over, if you so choose. Even if you don’t follow Shaun, if you choose to or convince General Ronnie/Preston to spare the Institute and use it for the Commonwealth’s benefit, you are left with it under your control, enforced by the Minutemen. 
So. What does this revision do?
I dislike when people portray him as an innocent, gentle little sunshine boy, and not as an army vet who survived where none of his fellow soldiers could. This man has an edge to him. He isn’t a small sad puppy, he has something of a mean streak in canon. In this revision, Preston has opportunities to demonstrate layers of his character, showing how his trauma and guilt has effected him. You get to see it for yourself, rather than hear about it. You can see him break down in Quincy, you can see him resist the idea that strangers can have good intentions, you can see him rebuild his hope for the Minutemen and himself. And you can also see him lose patience for people who have wronged him, want to cut down anyone who would threaten his people, be kind of irrational and lashing out.
I also dislike that the Minutemen have no visible effect on the wasteland, nothing you can actually see. No one else sees it, either. Here, people will acknowledge the Minutemen’s power. And, c’mon, in game, you are the only one doing anything. In this rehaul, you get things started, but people will be active participants in restoring the Minutemen, will build settlements for you. You can go decorate and fiddle around, but you won’t have to worry about water, food, beds, and defense, they’ll get it sorted themselves. The busywork is also passed off to soldiers, who you could potentially catch in the action as they clear out mutants or save kidnapped settlers.
And the finale of facing off against the Gunners, and either destroying them, or brushing them off as a decaying tantrum with guns, gives the Minutemen something to do for themselves, beyond the Institute. You’d have to lock off Quincy and Gunner HQ, so the player can’t clear them without going through the questline, but that’s fine, other quests do that. But the Gunners are never brought up, not really. It also lets Preston confront his greatest trauma and come up victorious, even if it hurt, and when deciding on the fate of Gunner HQ, lets him evolve as a person and take influence from the player, depending on their relationship. 
I think, as the de facto companion for his faction, Preston’s arc needs to be directly tied to it. The other companions don’t really have this either, but Preston got the short straw in that he was his faction. Everything came from him and was turned in to him. He became a dispenser for quests instead of one person in this group, with his own ideas about how to run it, his own fears and guilt about how it failed the first time. He doesn’t reflect the Minutemen, their ideals. Who they are as a collective.
Deacon, Danse, and X6 have their own massive writing issues, but it’s clear that they are representations of their factions. Deacon is an all-over-the-place trickster type trying to keep shit together, the Railroad is a clown car trying to smuggle slaves to safety. X6 is a cold, ruthless, logical Terminator, the Institute are cold, sterile, ends-justify-the-means scientists. Danse is a stern, no-nonsense soldier with a good heart under the Power Armor, the Brotherhood is a tight-knit brotherhood, an army with good intentions that often forgets who those good intentions are meant to serve. 
Preston...he’s a good guy, a traumatized one. The Minutemen...you have 5 nameless “Minuteman Soldier” NPCs, and Ronnie. So...the Minutemen is Preston, Preston is the Minutemen. He isn’t allowed to be Preston, who is a Minuteman. He’s Preston the Minuteman. 
That’s a damn shame.
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my-taintedheart · 26 days ago
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Life is Strange: Double Exposure..
honest review + comparison to LiS1!!
Also light spoiler warning!! If anyone wants it I will be explaining the plot. (it’s crazy confusing but i’ll try to help everyone get it)!! <3 if you want me to make a version without all the spoilers please tell me and I will!!
Key point I almost forgot to add, I chose Chloe died— I can’t see them breaking up and I can’t handle the mischaracterisation of her character either. (I will be playing the ‘We broke up’ pathway but because I just finished the game I wanna let it marinate). If you would like me to do a review on that (or just Chloe) I will, but please be patient!!
there are heavy spoilers in the paragraph about Safi’s character so be careful!!
I finished Life is Strange: Double Exposure the other night and I thought because they finally released the full game and some people (me) didn’t get Life is Strange (the first game) until a while after it’d released, I thought that you should know whether or not to get the game. I think with a game that costs as much as DE you definitely have to take reviews into consideration before spending that much money on a game that you might not like.
First of all, the plot. I thought in the early released 2 chapters I had a grasp on what was happening (I was wrong) the last 3 chapters completely lost me and I could barely put together the pieces of the plot without straining my head trying to understand— the plot could’ve been amazing but I feel as if it’s wasted potential considering that they didn’t need Max Caulfield to be the main character and she’s only there so it’ll be a ‘sequel’ but what i’ve noticed is that it isn’t an actual sequel to LiS1, my reasons for this are: the fact that the only thing connecting the two games are Max and her powers and Victoria Chase posting on Crosstalk.
Next of all, the romance options— I feel like Deck Nine were pushing romance way to much, which is most definitely shown in the game— so many characters were flirting with Max (I get it, she is unbelievably fine.) but I feel like it was too much— the smash or pass game with Vinh is just pushing it too much, yeah I get some adults may do that but it was giving high school and considering Max is pushing (or is?) 30, I felt like it was really childish for a bunch of middle aged/ young adults which is my reason for passing everyone (my heart belongs to Chloe..). I feel like even after friend-zoning Amanda and not drinking with Vinh they still continue to flirt with Max, which I find quite annoying since either of them can’t get the hint she isn’t available— the most annoying thing is that Vinh and Amanda aren’t even into Max like that, Amanda is trying to hide her feelings for Gwen (honestly real) and Vinh is still in love with Safi AND sleeping with Reggie who he later ends up getting with (i’m pretty sure..). No offence to Amanda or Vinh but I got the romantically disentangled badge (Romance neither Vinh or Amanda) because I feel like yes, Max deserves to love again but I don’t feel like in the 10 (?) years after Chloe died she would choose right after her friend (Safi) dies to start dating??
Like LiS1, Double Exposure took around 10 hours to finish the full game, I don’t really mind that because I had nothing to do anyways— the difference is that in LiS1 it didn’t really feel like 10 hours, it had such a steady flow that I got lost in and totally forgot time existed for those 10 hours. Whereas with Double Exposure it felt like time was slowed (in a bad way) and felt 2x longer than the 10 hours that I played, which would make sense for a game that Deck Nine produced because I felt the exact same way with Before the Storm. In my opinion it took so long to finish even though it was the same amount of time I spent on LiS1, I was bored and I just wanted it to be over with— and the fun and exciting feeling that LiS1 filled me with was severely lacking in Double Exposure.
The characters, where do I get started? First on my list:
Max, the main character of the game— she has changed so much in comparison to the girl she used to be in LiS1 but that’s understandable, almost a decade (I think?) later your bound to change even a little. I like how they kept her PTSD from The Dark Room which is shown in the last episode (I won’t spoil), I also like how they kept her nervous aspects but also made her a more confident character which is both shown when Amanda comes over to comfort her and Max says ‘I could eat you under the table’ without realising what it means until she says it, to which she (obviously) get super awkward about when she realises.
Next, Amanda honestly I feel like she was a super nice character and had okay writing which was sadly wasted potential because she (like most of the others) was a character around only to be a romance option for Max and lacked a true personality that didn’t revolve around romance or trying to flirt with Max (even after I friend-zoned Amanda..).
Next: Vinh, the fact that he had more of a personality and character than most of the other characters is disappointing because it’s also wasted potential, coincidentally wasted on guess what? Him only being an important (kinda) character, so he could also be a romance option is disappointing due that he was a (relatively) relatable character for some players. Sadly like Amanda, his whole personality revolved around trying to get into Max’s pants and the fact that he was in love with Safi— and at the same time sleeping around with Reggie.
Heavy spoilers below!! (Skip if you don’t wanna be spoiled)
Next: Safi, honestly her whole character was beyond confusing I mean there isn’t much I can say that could make sense without all the context— but I liked her, her character was probably one of the only characters that had character (if that makes sense?) her backstory was lacking in a way that Chloe’s wasn’t. (I’ll explain how I think they’re connected.) Also, her entire character was wasted on her confusing super-villain trope, all I got was that her Dad left and her Mom was in a bad mental state, her Mom tried to prove that she didn’t need Safi’s Dad’s help to do something right so she pressured Safi to be perfect to the point where Safi broke and became able to shape-shift into somebody else (which nobody, until Max knew about)— and she spiralled out of control after she found out her Mother cancelled her book deal (which was about Maya) and caused a storm because she lost control of her powers (like Max).
Last but not least, my comparison to LiS1– the main difference between Life is Strange and Double Exposure would be the producers: Life is Strange was produced by DONTNOD, correct me if I’m wrong who was fired by Deck Nine after they bought the Life is Strange name— Double Exposure was produced by Deck Nine (sadly) which was shown in the way the game/ characters were presented and produced. What I am the most mad about is how I feel like Deck Nine didn’t try with Double Exposure and only rode off Life is Strange and the nostalgia that comes with it along with Max Caulfield’s name. What I think is the worst joke of all is Chloe: the mischaracterisation, demonisation or just all together the lack of her character. Yes, I get that they may break up, but after everything they’ve been through? Also, the only reason they ‘broke up’ was because Deck Nine hated Chloe because she and Max were a more popular ship in LiS and they treasure Chloe and Rachel because they originate from their game (Before the Storm, which Deck Nine not DONTNOD produced) and are just salty that DONTNOD was praised for one of the best wlw ships in show and game history (my opinion!!) and didn’t want to bring either of her 2 voice actors back to voice her..
Sorry, now this is the last!! What I’ve noticed about Double Exposure the most are the many similarities between the characters, for example: Chloe and Safi. Safi resembles Chloe in many ways such as— her personality, her want for revenge and yet her want to sacrifice herself so that the others she has hurt can live and survive the storm that in theory was caused by her: Safi causes the storm after she spirals out of control of her powers and Chloe (indirectly) causes the storm after Max saves her from getting shot in the bathroom from Nathan Prescott.
Maya, Safi and Max remind me so heavily of Rachel, Chloe and Max— Max is trying so hard to save Safi/ Chloe and trying to prevent their deaths while they’re still stuck on their dead or missing ex-girlfriend/ friend who is no longer in the picture but is always still talked about by them and many others (Rachel and Maya are constantly haunting the narrative).
Vinh and Nathan, there are so many noticeable similarities between the two— the only difference being their financial status and their mental state. Their personalities, how they act, how Vinh made a false statement after Maya died about her mental health and how Nathan ended up overdosing Rachel on accident. Both try to prove themselves, to show that they aren’t their parents and they’re more than just who their parents think they’ll turn out to be. For example: Nathan, accidentally overdoses Rachel (who was his friend, or trusted him enough to take drugs with him) in an attempt to prove himself to Mark Jefferson— and Vinh makes a false statement about Maya’s mental health (who he was supposedly friends with), and was talked about to of ‘followed them around like a puppy’ (the ‘them’ being Safi and Maya). So he can prove himself to Yasmin (Safi’s mother) and have a stable job because he knows that he won’t make it far as an actor and wants a stable fallback plan so he won’t end up working at his parent’s liquor store.
Amanda and Warren, at first I thought of how Amanda reminds me of Chloe but then I realised she is more like Warren in a way, crushing on Max— and even after getting friend-zoned they both still wanted to be close to Max. One of the only differences is that Warren was in love with Max and Amanda was in love with Gwen (I’m pretty sure?), also another difference is Amanda’s personality is more of a mixture of Chloe’s punk-ness and Warren’s sweetness.
I think (for now) the final similarity between the games I have noticed is how the ending of Double Exposure is not original at all. I mean, Double Exposure is an exact carbon copy of the first Life is Strange game— yes I know Double Exposure is a sequel to the first game but that isn’t an excuse for it to be the same game just a different confusing plot, even the characters and the ending were unoriginal. It’s disappointing how this game is so expensive just for the characters and ending to be almost the same as the first game. I mean come on, you have to choose between the town being destroyed and not killing your best friend who you tried so hard to not let end up dying just for you to have to choose— sound familiar? Yeah, it’s the same ending as LiS: You have to choose between the town, rewinding time through a photo to when Nathan shot Chloe and not rewinding time so that you don’t cause the storm trying to save her from that moment on— or choose Chloe and let the town get destroyed because you vowed to never leave her, after (clearly) falling in love with her as you play as Max. Even the way Max goes back in DE to the moment before she shoots Safi is the same as she used to go back before you Max uses her powers to save Chloe. A photo, be more original?
I can’t believe they are so salty towards a fictional character (Chloe) that they would try and replace her with another character (Safi) who severely lacks the emotional depth and writing that Chloe has. Even replicating the ‘Bae or Bay’ ending with Max and Safi? They’re trying so hard to replace Chloe just because they don’t like her but I know that they can’t undo 9 full years of falling in love with Max and Chloe (pricefield), by just remaking the ending with Safi and Max and trying to push their ship on using just so their game can qualify as LGBTQ+ so they can make more money.
In conclusion, wait until it’s on sale at least to waste your money on this game— not only did they make us wait almost an entire decade for a pricefield or After the Storm (Basically a game that included pricefield and what happened after the storm) related game sequel but they piggybacked off LiS and Max Caulfield’s names to squeeze the last drops of money out of a project (started by DONTNOD) that was supposed to share their art style and their story without using it for money, as far as I’m concerned Double Exposure is not canon due to the fact it’s an obvious cash grab with multiple bugs and glitches that show that the game was rushed. I mean, there are multiple reports of layoffs a week before the game is released and how rushed it is.
I don’t think Double Exposure could ever compare to LiS I mean seriously after I’d finished Life is Strange , I sat there sobbing for like a whole hour I mean I was just shocked because just— wow. I think Life is Strange was the first game (or even thing) to make me feel like a different person— like it had changed me in some inexplicable way and all I knew was and now is that I love Life is Strange and nothing will ever change that. Whereas Double Exposure I just finished it and went: ‘meh, I’m just gonna watch some YouTube’— also like Before the Storm (also produced by Deck Nine) I finished the game and was just bored, in absolutely no way did it have the same effect on me that the first Life is Strange game did.
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got-into-worm-by-mistake · 5 months ago
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Agitation 3.1 Live Reactions
(This is me, writing reactions as I read, because why the fuck not. They're not complete, mature thoughts taken after I sit back and evaluate what I've read. Consider them as such)
Bank Job Arc LET'S GOOOOOO!
(I Think?)
There was something appealing about being out and about before the city had woken up. 
There are many things I'll never be able to relate to wrt Taylor, I'm sure, some already, but this
Yeah. this has to be on top of that list. Becoming a warlord villain of the city? Sure what the fuck I'm all for that.
Liking being out and about at an ungodly hour? Fuck that noise.
It was like Brockton Bay was a ghost town, in a good way.
Taylor? One question:
What The Fuck?
 In February, Sophia had goaded some boys into trying to catch me, I think the goal had been to duct tape me to a telephone pole. I had escaped, helped mostly by the fact that the boys hadn’t really cared enough to run after me,
Huh. So that actually happened. I figured the fic I read here they do catch her (and then she accidentally goes wild with the Swarm, etc) just had that written as Sophia doing an escalation she didn't do in canon.
Christ, that bitch is just... someone really needs to stab Sophia. A lot.
(Like, yes, I can grant it's... not great when the story has so few black people and one of them is Sophia and she's written like... that, but still. Sophia - fucked up and vile)
Three and a half months had burned away the body fat, leaving me very lean, and had given me the stamina to run at a steady jog without leaving me panting for breath.
Lucky bitch. Three and a half months of jogging wouldn't do that for me.
(Maybe if I actually committed to it like she has, but I'm lazy so :rofl: )
There were only a few people out and about, which made it easy to find Brian.
Wait, you were here looking for Brian? Maybe clue is in sooner, Taytay?
“I want,” I said, then I felt dumb for the awkward lapse into caveman speak.  I blamed the early hour of the day.  To try and save face, I added, “Thanks.”
:rofl:
 “Don’t coffees there cost, like, fifteen dollars a cup?” Brian chuckled a little, “We can afford it, Taylor.”
And? Still a waste of money I'm willing to bet.
Also, like whomst the fuck, in 2011, was selling $15 coffee to go? Is Wildbow mistaking US and Canadian Dollars? Even in canada that feels like a lot for coffee?
Did Leviathan make coffee more expensive or something?
These guys were raking in thousands of dollars on a given job, and they had given me two thousand dollars up front. 
Yeah but you don't stay rich by just casually dropping $15 on your morning coffee.
I extended my arm, clenched my fist and relaxed it to demonstrate, “Only hurts when I flex it.”  I didn’t tell him that it had been hurting badly enough to cost me some sleep last night.
Trying to seem tough in front of the guy you're into, or just used to pretending she doesn't hurt as much as she does? Or both?
“Makes sense,” I said, then I added, “I read her page on the wiki.” “So you’ve got the gist of it,”
An accurate wiki!? LE GASP!
I spotted a crab scuttling across the beach almost directly below us.  I reached out with my power and stopped it in its tracks.  Though I didn’t need to, I extended my finger and pointed at it, then waved my finger lazily as I made the crab follow where my my index finger was pointing.  Since Brian and I were both leaning over the railing, and there was practically nobody on the Boardwalk that wasn’t busy with work or getting their store opened for the day, I was pretty certain nobody else would figure out what I was doing. Brian saw the crab dancing in circles and figure eights and smiled.  Conspiratorially, he leaned closer to me and whispered, “You can control crabs, too?” I nodded, feeling just a bit of a thrill at how we were huddled like this, sharing secrets while the people around us were totally in the dark.  I told him, “I used to think I could control anything with an exoskeleton or shell.  But I can control earthworms too, among other things, and they don’t have shells.  I think all it takes is that they have to have very simple brains.”
But there have to be other animals that also have simple brains she can't control? Some birds and mammals can, no?
It's time to say it again: POWERS
ARE
BULLSHIT
(I suspect I'll be saying that a lot. :rofl:)
Of course, it could be her powers run on what she conceptually thinks are bugs or buglike? Like, if she could convince herself that squirrels are bugs, could she control them?
I shook my head, “I gotta get home and get ready for school.” “Ah, right,” Brian said, “I forget about stuff like that.” “You guys don’t go?” “I take courses online,” Brian said, “My folks think it’s so I can hold a job to pay for my apartment… which is kind of true.  Alec dropped out, Rachel never went, and Lisa already applied for and tested for her G.E.D.  Cheated using her power, but she has it.”
It is kind of remarkable that Taylor doesn't just... give up on school, from what I gather she keeps going sometimes even well into her Villain career. I doubt Winslow would really care enough to reach out to Taylor's dad if she just... stopped actually attending.
“Ah,” I said, my focus more or less dwelling on the idea that Brian had an apartment.  Not the fact that Grue the successful supervillain had an apartment – Lisa had mentioned that to me – but that Brian the teenager with parents and schoolwork to focus on did.  He kept changing my frame of reference for trying to figure him out.
Villains are human and complex!
“That’s to our place,” he told me, “And I mean that.  Ours as in yours too.  You’re free to come by any time, even if nobody is there.  Kick back and watch TV, eat our food, track mud on our floor, yell at the others for tracking mud on the floor, whatever.” “Thank you,” I said, surprising myself by actually meaning it.
Well fuck. Yeah.
Fuck.
All this poor girl wants is a place to belong. A place to be welcome.
I mean, not all she wants, really, I suppose, but a huge part.
That wasn’t to say I didn’t like Lisa, but just being around her made me feel like I had the Sword of Damocles hanging over my head.
Understandable.
Heading back home and preparing for school left me with a gradually increasing feeling of dread, like a weight sitting on my chest.  I’d been trying not to think of Emma’s taunting and my fleeing from the school with tears on my face.  I had spent an hour or two tossing and turning in bed, the event replaying over my head while the throbbing of my wrist jarred me awake every time I started to drift off.  Beyond that, I had been pretty successful in avoiding thinking about it.  Now that the prospect of going back was looming, though, it was impossible not to dwell on the subject as I headed home, got ready and caught the bus.
Taylor "Repress Repress Repress" Hebert!
I still had to face the consequences of missing two afternoons.
Do you?
This wasn’t the first time I’d needed to psych myself up to going to school.  Deceive myself into going and staying.  The worst days had been back in my first year at high school, when the wounds of Emma’s betrayal were still fresh and I wasn’t yet experienced enough to anticipate the variety of things they could come up with.  Back then, it had been terrifying, because I hadn’t yet known what to expect, didn’t know where, when or if they would draw the line. 
Ooof
Or, I thought, maybe I could just look forward to hanging out with Lisa, Alec and Brian.  Outside of the part where I nearly got mauled by Bitch’s dogs, it had been a nice night.
I mean, that's like saying "Apart from the part where she mindraped and then actually raped her sister, Amy Dallon does wonderful things in Worm"
Okay, not really, not even close, but still. That is a very big 'apart from' to just... set aside. :rofl:
 it had been a nice night.  Thai food, five of us lounging on two couches, watching an action movie on a huge entertainment system with surround sound.  I wasn’t forgetting what they were, but I rationalized that I had no reason to feel bad about spending time with them when we were – for all intents and purposes – just a group of teenagers hanging out.  Besides, it was for a good cause, if it meant they relaxed around me and maybe revealed secrets.  Right?
Capacity for self-rationalization, thy name is Taylor. :rofl:
Even though I knew, rationally, that I probably wasn’t on the list of their top five things to talk about and that they likely weren’t talking about me, I felt my heart sink.  
No, you probably are. I'm pretty sure you live rent free in both Taylor and Emma's heads and always will. A year and a half of targeting bullying, day in, day out.
Honestly, like, forget the immorality and awfulness of doing that, just... committing to that much bullying to one person that consistently - It just feels like it would be exhausting.
 One of the other girls noticed and chuckled, leaned closer to Sophia as Sophia whispered something in her ear, then they both laughed.  My cheeks flushed with humiliation.  
Like I said. Rent Free.
 For one and three-quarter school years, I had been putting up with this shit.  I’d been going against the current for a long time, and even though I was aware of the consequences I’d face if I kept missing school like this, it was so much easier to stop pushing so hard against the current and just step in the other direction. My hands jammed into my pockets, already feeling an ambivalent sort of relief, I caught the bus back to the docks.
Life advice from Skitter:
"Drop out of school, and become a supervillain kids!"
:rofl:
(But also, good on you Taylor. In this case, quitting school is the better choice. Fukitol and all that)
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cheerscoops · 1 year ago
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ship: Jonathan Byers/Eddie Munson wc: 1.8k A/N: This one was suggested by my favorite @sherifftillman <3 I take the two freak boys and I squish. Hopefully they (and the minor background ship) live up to everyone's expectations!
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“Hey Byers! Wait up!”
Jonathan stopped walking to his next class and turned to find Eddie Munson of all people racing towards him.
“I have a proposition for you,” he said once he’d caught up to Jonathan. “A job opportunity really.”
“What kind of job opportunity?” He was always looking to make a little more money around the holidays, and if the job wasn’t anything illegal, he’d seriously consider the extra work.
“So, as I’m sure you’re aware, I’m the frontman for a pretty spectacular band known as Corroded Coffin, and me and the guys were hoping to do a little something special for our fans this year. Granted, there are maybe five of them total, but still. They deserve a little something special as a token of appreciation for supporting us. Anyway, we wanted to send out a special Christmas card to our friends this year. Maybe include a flier about some upcoming shows in it? It’s still very much in the planning stages. All we know is that we want a really great photo of the whole band to go on the front of the card. That’s where you come in.”
“You want me to shoot your Christmas card?”
“Well, yeah. We don’t want an amateur with a disposable camera doing this. We want it to look good, and as far as I’m concerned, you’re the most talented photographer any of us knows. Maybe the most talented in all of Hawkins. I mean those photos you had in the school art show last year? Magazine worthy. Especially the one of that fort in the woods. It looked seriously haunted in the coolest way possible. Way better than anything anyone else submitted.”
Jonathan was touched. He knew most people only knew him as that freak with the camera, and he’d be lying if he hadn’t assumed that was why Eddie was asking when he first mentioned the card. But Eddie actually knew his work and appreciated it. He wasn’t asked just because he had a camera. He was asked because he had vision.
“How much does the job pay?” he asked.
“We’re not exactly rolling in it right now. Shocking, I know. But we talked about it and pulled our money. We can buy you a roll of film for the project so you don’t have to waste any of your own on us, and then we think we can reasonably afford to pay you for your time with twenty bucks and dinner at Benny’s afterwards. I know it’s not a lot, but it would mean a lot to us if you’d consider it. Plus, you can use the photos you take for any assignment or art show you might have coming up. And, come on.” Eddie gestured to himself. “If this handsome face is in your work, you’ll win all the top prizes for sure."
Eddie was right that it wasn’t a lot, but it was enough that it would make a difference in the quality of the gifts that Jonathan was able to get his mom and brother for Christmas. And if he didn’t have to use his own film, it was a net gain no matter what.
“So, say I agree to do this,” he started. “And I’m not agreeing just yet, but say that I do. What kinds of photos are you looking for?”
“Maybe something goofy and posed with all of us? Or artsy if you prefer. And then maybe a couple photos of us actually playing? We’ve got a Santa hat and some elf hats we were thinking of wearing since this is for a Christmas thing, but wearing them isn’t a deal breaker if you think the pictures would look better without them. Totally willing to defer to the real artistic genius here. I just want the pictures to look good, and you’re the only person I trust to make it happen.”
The idea of creative control was enticing enough to seal the deal for him.
“Alright. I’m in. When and where do you need me?”
“We haven’t settled on a specific day or time yet, but probably sometime this weekend. I’ll talk to the guys at lunch and let you know the plan before the end of the day though. I owe you my life for this. Seriously.”
With that, Eddie was racing off down the hall leaving Jonathan to try and come up with a way to make heavy metal Christmas cards into something appropriate for any of his photography class assignments.
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That Saturday afternoon, Jonathan met up with the guys outside of the Hideout. The plan was to do posed photos outside and then go inside to take a few pictures of them playing. As long as they stayed focused on getting the shots they wanted, they'd be done in time for that promised dinner at Benny's.
He didn't think it would take too long, but then again, he didn't really know what working with Eddie would be like. The guy was all over him, and it was more than a little distraction. Eddie just had so many questions about his process, and he wanted to look through the camera and get an idea of what Jonathan was seeing. Or, if he wasn't asking questions, he was touching him. Adjusting a twisted camera strap, placing a hand on Jonathan's back as he leaned in the eye the proposed shot, poking at him to get his attention, grabbing at his arm to pull him over to any place he thought they could get a good photo. If Jonathan didn't know any better, he would've thought that Eddie was into him.
“Come on, Eddie,” he said as he tried to get him to pose properly for what he thought might be their last shot. “Quit it with whatever that brooding, tortured artist look is. You said you wanted something goofy, not sexy.”
“So you think I'm sexy?” Eddie asked, quirking an eyebrow.
Jonathan could feel his face burning.
“Just let me take the picture.”
He snapped a couple more photos in quick succession before putting the lens cap back on his camera.
“I think I got everything you guys wanted out here. Let's take a ten minute break, and then we can set up for the performance shots.”
Jonathan headed inside for a moment alone, but he'd barely sat down before Gareth was joining him at his table.
“You know we didn't need to hire you for this, right?” he started. “Jeff's parents own that hobby shop downtown, and his mom would have lent us a camera for free if we promised not to smash it. A fancy one with a timer so we wouldn't have even needed a photographer to get this done.”
“If that's the case, why am I here?”
“You haven't figured it out yet?”
“Figured out what?”
“You really have no idea. He's about as subtle as a heart attack, and you still don't know.”
“Can you please fill me in so I can make even a little bit of sense of what you're saying?”
“Eddie wanted you to do this so he'd have an excuse to spend time with you and get to know you a little better.”
“And he was willing to pay me twenty bucks for the opportunity?”
“Well, yeah. When he's that into someone, he loses all sense of logic and reason. Even more so than usual.”
Jonathan was stunned speechless. Eddie was into him? Suddenly all of his badgering made sense, and when he really stopped to think about it, the badgering wasn't unwelcome. If he wasn't in the middle of lining up a shot, he could see himself enjoying what was apparently Eddie's attempt at flirting.
“So, why doesn't he just ask me out? It would probably be cheaper than paying me to be your band's personal photographer.”
“He's afraid that you'd say no which I think is stupid because it's obvious how much he gets under your skin.”
“I don't know what you're talking about.”
“Dude. Your entire face looked like a tomato after you accidentally called him sexy. Pretty sure that was your subconscious telling you that you're into him, too.”
Jonathan didn't know what to say. Before he'd asked him to do this, he didn't realize Eddie even knew who he was, and now he was facing the very real possibility that he could maybe be into Eddie, too.
“Look," Gareth started. "You don't have to say anything to me or him or anybody. But, if you wanted, I could make something happen. All I ask is that you do a small favor for me.”
“Name it.”
“Put in a good word for me with Nancy?” he asked. “I find her beautiful and terrifying.”
“I'll see what I can do.”
Gareth stood up from his seat and smiled at Jonathan.
“It's been a pleasure doing business with you.”
Their break ended shortly after that, and Jonatham took a series of photos of them playing through two different songs so he could get a variety of different angles for each member of the band. Once he figured he'd gotten everything he needed, he motioned for the band to stop.
“I'm pretty sure I just used up the last of the film you guys brought, so we can call it here. I'll develop everything when I have access to the photo lab on Monday and get the prints to you as soon as possible.”
“We're done?” Eddie sounded more than a little disappointed and he crossed over to where Jonathan was loading his camera back into his bag.
“I think so. But I remember being promised dinner at Benny's as part of my payment, so we could head there now if you want.”
“Definitely. We just need to load up our stuff, and then we can all head out.”
“Actually, the guys and I have a thing,” Gareth said. “And we can't get out of it, so you guys are gonna have to go by yourselves.”
“What thing?” Jeff asked. “We don't have a-”
He was cut off from finishing his sentence by Gareth smacking his arm and pointedly looking back and forth between him and where Eddie was standing with Jonathan.
“Oh! Right!” Jeff said after the realization hit. “That thing. So sad we can't make it.”
“You crazy kids have fun without us!” Gareth said as he ushered the other two bandmates out of the bar.
“I'm going to kill him,” Eddie muttered under his breath, making Jonathan huff out a laugh.
“No, you're not.”
“Oh, but I am. I'm already drafting up posters advertising our need for a new drummer.”
“Go easy on him. He just did you a massive favor.”
Eddie crossed his arms over his chest.
“How do you figure?”
“He just got you a date with the guy you've been shamelessly flirting with all day.”
Eddie's jaw dropped. He definitely wasn't expecting that response from him.
“I'm pretty sure the guys just left without loading their stuff into the van, so pick your jaw off the floor and let me help you get that taken care of. Then you can flirt with me some more.”
Eddie changed his mind. He wasn't killing Gareth. He was gonna owe him for the rest of his life for helping him earn a date with Jonathan Byers.
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stvrdrops · 2 years ago
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study date ? ☆ riri x fem!college!reader
who knew that someone spilling coffee on you could be such a good thing? especially when she’s super smart and super pretty.
warnings : some light cursing and mention of drugs !
word count : 1k+
note : this was my first time writing for riri and i thought this was such a cute little concept that i just had to write !!
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visiting the cafe on callus was by far one of your least favorite things to do. you’d think because it was a coffee place that the atmosphere there would be welcoming and chill. well, you’d be absolutely mistaken.
at least fifty college kids strung up on study drugs or worrying about their finals or worrying about their finals are waiting in line for a latte that will probably be gulped down within a second. every plug within eyesight is being taken up by a computer charger or a phone charger. one time you saw a girl in there hook up a coffee mug warmer. not to mention, everyone in there loves to use the free wifi. which defeats the purpose because after everyone connects to it, it’s just as fast as the regular dorm wifi. maybe even worse!
however, you were here today standing in line with the exact kids who order their lattes and then gulp them down. you were supposed to be meeting a friend but she was late, like always. it had been a while since you’d even been in the cafe considering you often just travel the to the starbucks. the coffee there was way better, but the prices here you couldn’t pass upS the chocolate croissants were pretty good too you had to admit.
“what can i get for you?” the barista said to you with a wide smile and cheery voice.
“just a hot chocolate and chocolate croissant please.” you said while fumbling around in your purse to pull out your debit card.
“that’ll be 10.69”
not that bad.
“here you go.” you hand her the card and are filled with relief when the computer makes a ding noise. being a broke college student was not for the weak.
“can i have a name for the order?”
“yeah, it’s just y/n.” your hand reached out for the card and you stuffed it back into your purse. the baristas usually ask you how to spell that, but it didn’t matter cause they always got it wrong anyway.
you quickly exit out of the line without realizing how fast of a turn you did. the sudden feeling of hot coffee seeps through your brand new white sweatshirt that displayed your college so proudly in front of it. it had cost you seventy dollars. seventy dollars now wasted due to the stain that was bound to reside. who got full on black coffee anyway?
“hey!” you screamed as you attempted to wipe off the coffee with a napkin you found nearby.
“you should’ve watched where you were going!”
“you totally ruined my sweater!”
the mystery woman groaned, “i think my computer is a lot more valuable than your sweater. which, you almost knocked out my hands by the way.”
you finally lifted your eyes to see a girl you’ve seen on campus before. her name was familiar to you, riri or something. you heard she made money off of writing other people’s papers for them. most of those kids strung up on study drugs were usually the ones paying for her services. after all, they had the money to waste. you were surprised she was still on campus despite almost everyone knowing of her little business. how the dean didn’t catch on was beyond you.
“well, i only see one thing ruined here.”
“not true.” she spoke with her eyebrows furrowed, “you ruined my coffee.”
you hated the fact she was right.
“how much do i owe you?” you grit your teeth at the girl who was actually incredibly attractive. wait, what? sure she was cute with her eyebrows furrowed and just how angry she was about a coffee and a computer that she could easily rebuy, but was this the time to come to that realization?
“don’t worry about it.” riri lets her demeanor drop a little as she realizes just how bad your sweater looks. she had been admiring you in it from across the room just a few seconds prior. you had made it hard for her to refocus on the new code she was trying to implement for her new project. she kept having to hit backspace everytime she let her finger rest on a key for too long.
“what do i owe you for the sweater again?” she asked, which had caught you by surprise.
to be honest you could ask your momma for the money and she would gladly give it to her little angel. so in the end you didn’t want the money from riri.
“i guess it’s fine. i’ll just try to get it out.” you say as you attempt to walk away to the next window where the food pickup was located. after all this you better get your damn hot chocolate and croissant.
“no, wait!” riri grabs onto your sleeve causing you to turn around. “is there really nothing i can do? i kinda feel awful about how i reacted and how badly i ruined your sweater. i’m usually not a dickhead i promise.”
you thought for a second as she looked at you with pleading eyes.
“study date?” you asked her, while tilting your head. one of your curls in your bun fell in front of your face so effortlessly and riri felt her heart jump.
“what?”
“a study date. you can help me prepare for this exam i have coming up in my engineering class. i heard your smart, and i also heard your time is expensive. probably worth a lot more than my sweater but—“
“i’d love to!” she says, quickly realizing how fast she said it, “i mean, yeah sure it’s not a problem. if it helps then i’m glad to go on a study date with you.”
“cool. here’s my number.” you quickly grabbed a pen from your purse and wrote it down on a clean napkin. they were coming in very helpful today. riri had been internally freaking out the whole time as you handed it to her. your hand even brushed against hers for a second and she felt the computer in her other hand wobble.
“i’ll text you.” she says with a wide smile on her face, something most people never saw due to her hard exterior.
“i hope so.” you smile back to her, forgetting for a second that your sweater was even ruined.
“order for y/n?” a man calls from the pickup counter. you turn your head in the direction of him and raise your hand a bit. you give a wave to riri before going to pick up the croissant and hot chocolate at the counter.
maybe the cafe wasn’t so bad after all.
˖⁺。˚⋆˙✧⋆。°✩☼⋆。°✩☽
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the-trans-folk-witch · 2 years ago
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A not so kind rebuttal to my interview with Dazed Beauty Magazine. Trans witches were wronged.
First, some quotes from friends, and strangers turned friends on the matter:
“PLEASE!!! Florence! I think everyone needs to read something of substance around this. The banal saturation is fucking mind numbing.”- Samanthareadsgood
“Think about yourself and don’t be worrying about hurting other people feelings because she’s not considering you… And look at it coldly…She interviewed you for something which you consented to and then she did something else. That’s not okay.” -René ( victim Former friend of the author Isabella AKA sister_bella on Instagram.)
And last but not least, “IM SCREAMING. STOP 4RrEAL!?” Austin of banexbramble on Instagram. Typos intentional and copied.
The article in question- (I hate to give it traffic but context…) https://www.dazeddigital.com/beauty/article/59809/1/why-trans-people-are-finding-power-and-place-in-witchcraft
The story-
Awhile back I was randomly messaged by an Instagram page run by a writer for dazed beauty. She expressed that she was writing an article on transgender witches and wanted to interview me. But it needed to be done that night. I did not see the message until a few days later. It seemed sketchy but as a fan of the magazine I took the bait. The woman seemed nice enough and I enjoyed the idea of transness being represented in witchcraft conversations. She had her due date extended.
She asked several questions which I thought were very well crafted. I formulated my replies to her via text and spent a total of two hours chatting with her on the subject. There were paragraphs of content to write on. I was very proud of my work. I was ready to discuss the history of trans people as learned in college through my gender studies courses. I wanted to discuss the GallI of Greece, the Gala of Sumer, the two spirit and other indigenous titles for third/alt genders- my fav being the Hijra of India. I wanted to discuss the transness of the Ethiopian eunuch in the Bible… not Joan of arc… I didn’t mention her. But none of that was of interest clearly. The History was too in-depth to write on for this magazine probably. Word counts and all…
I was lead to believe that this informal and rushed interview was going to be in a interview-to-text- format. I assumed it would be stylized with a question from the writer in bold, and a long winded response from me below it. Like how celebrities are interviewed haha. But girl was I wrong…
Not only was the entirety of the article kept from me post interview, but only one small paragraph was shown to me from our entire conversation. I assumed there was more… there was not. My time and words wasted for a misquote. One sentence of mine made it to the article. And it was not even worded properly. it’s context was stripped. I was explaining how in traditional witchcraft, witches are seen as “other”. Not in a other-kin way, but in a transformative way via gnosis. I went on to describe my feelings of dysphoria and it’s overlap with my spiritual beliefs. But all she heard was “Florence thinks being trans is inhuman and I’m going to word this in a sloppy way to validate TERF’s and their dehumanization of tranniez.”…
On top of this money grabbing terf ridden article, there were loads of TERFy comments making fun of the lack of sources, proper historical legitimacy, and me.
To make matters worse better, i was not tagged in the article advertisement on Instagram. This both angered me and relieved me. My name was not caught up in this shit. But my time was not being recognized. Instead, the more famous, more appreciated interviewed were highlighted. And there is no telling if their logic was sound. I was not aware of their interviews. Judging from their Instagram content, I’m sure they are less informed on true magic or history… if you read this article, I’m sure you saw the portion comparing Joan of arc to trans men. I would like to say the writer of the article completely fabricated that herself. But who knows what other shit people are spewing.
When I heard of this article, I thought a cis woman was highlighting the experiences of trans people by giving us a platform. This is something I gladly allow! But instead, she was taking the crumbs of our words and using them for woke points and click bait. It was a poorly formed article with no real point. It was a mishmash of words speaking loosely of an issue that is already difficult to describe. It allowed space for terf’s and non witches alike to give their shitty opinions. And the writer??? Nowhere to be seen. Dazed beauty? No reply or combat against the ever-flowing comments. It’s as if this entire article was a ruse to make us all look stupid.
So now that I’ve got that out of the way, let’s talk about the author and her personal life. When she approached me she seemed nice. I genuinely thought I had a shot at maybe being represented in a magazine I like. She was willing to offer me that. But little did I know, she had sketchy occult business practices of her own. This woman has titled herself a “priestess, sorceress, spell caster” and other trigger words to make her look powerful. Other than aesthetics, she has no real grab on a magical tradition. I was informed of her moving to Mexico and hosting “full moon rituals” of some ambiguous type. At these rituals she was charging people 300 MXN twice a month on full and dark moons with no explanation of what would take place there. People were somewhat pressured into discussing sexual trauma, and others believed it was a safe space to share things. However, it was cult-like psychology at play. There was no real therapy practices implemented. It was just an unqualified woman just crying to strangers and making them pay her since it was cheaper than real therapy. It was not sound. It was not ethical.
People tried leaving. To which she would send many many messages to those people as if they were friends. She was trying to make people feel guilty for not coming to her “rituals” that cost money. It was treated as betrayal to her…
Anyway, all of that mess aside, let’s show some actual sources to discuss the history of Trans people. I have said this many times before and I hope I don’t sound like a brag, but I have 2 degrees in sociology at escalating levels. I actually am hoping to write a text book in collaboration with my university next year on similar subjects. Here are some texts I read in my gender studies classes and plan to cite in future works. Please please consider these texts. I do not want to waste my time explaining what’s already been beautifully written by others. Especially for FREE on TUMBLR.
-Histories of the Transgender Child by Jules Gill-Peterson
-Sexing the body: Gender politics and the construction of sexuality by Dr. Anne Fausto-Sterling
-Brain Storm: The Flaws in the Science of Sex Differences. By Dr. Rebecca Jordan-Young
-Measuring Manhood: Race and the Science of Masculinity by Dr. Melissa N. Stein
-Sexual Science: The Victorian Construction of Womanhood by Dr. Cynthia Russet.
As for trans people’s place in occult spaces or religion, I highly recommend reading the following links and titles. [It’s also important to note here that the Joan of arc mess in the original article, could have been replaced with the Ethiopian eunuch of the Bible… “but no. Cis girl brain go brrrrr. Must pick popular feminist figure and make up a history”]
https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC6830999
The Soul of the Stranger: Reading God and Torah from a Transgender Perspective. Chicago, Illinois: The University of Chicago Press.
A Comparative Analysis of Hijras and Drag Queens: The Subversive Possibilities and Limits of Parading Effeminacy and Negotiating Masculinity." Ed. Stephen Hunt, Religions of the East. Surrey: Ashgate, 2010.
The Invisibles: A Tale of the Eunuchs of India.
Islamic Homosexualities: Culture, History, and Literature (for Sumerian trans priests)
https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gala_(priests)#:~:text=The%20Gala%20(Sumerian%3A%20%F0%92%8D%91%F0%92%86%AA%20gala,institutions%20of%20Mesopotamian%20city%20states.
Thank you. That is all.
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drippinpeachesnhoney · 11 months ago
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Vent non Ana related
I’ve spent this entire month decorating, planning, and preparing for our first real Christmas as a family and my in laws invited my BIL. Who I use to think was a great friend.
He’s actually an asshole. His core he’s a good person but he doesn’t think of others at all. We were super close when he was fat. Then he lost a bunch of weight (proud of him) but he just changed. He doesn’t check in on a single one of us. His dad is literally going for open heart surgery in a month and he wants him to take him and his gf hiking in a huge national park because he’s too scared to drive up there in the snow. Although we live close to it my FIL will either have to hike around with them or sit in the car alone for hours…fun.
They moved in with us for a little bit last year, completely trashed the living room we had no where to sit. It was just treadmills. Then when they moved out he left it that way. Knowing I’d have to clean it because I take care of the house and I cleaned his bedroom when he left the first time. Idk if he just doesn’t think of things like that? He’s literally in his 30s. I would think he’d be more considerate. (We live with my in laws btw)
Now he’s coming here for Christmas because he doesn’t want to be alone while his gf is with her fam. Which I get but he doesn’t contribute anything at all to anything. We had so much planned and I was going to cook so much because I enjoy it but I will not cook for him. He’s so ungrateful. So to not make things awkward I’m just not cooking. I’m not even being sarcastic when I say this but I’d have more interaction with a fake plant that’s how little he contributes to just life, with us at least.
We had a convo with my in laws telling them how we felt and that we just don’t want to be around him. We told them that if they invite him that’s totally fine and we will leave for the holiday. They said they understood and would reach out to plan for him to come around new years instead of Christmas. I’ve been telling my MIL to call him for the last 2 weeks. She finally did tonight and came and told us the news that he’s coming. After I’ve literally planned everything for just the 5 of us because she told me he was for sure not coming.
I just hate that she waited until last minute when we could’ve known this weeks ago and I wouldn’t have gone so hardcore in all my planning. It feels like she waited so it was like “too late it has to happen”. So tonight I moved all the decorations I put up in the living room into our room. I know it sounds petty but I (alone) put so much work into it and planned so much just for it to go to shit idc.
I’m usually down for being fake nice with distant family but I don’t even talk to my own mother anymore for not giving my little family the same effort we gave her. I’m sure as hell not gonna do that with a brother in law.
This is long and probably makes me sound horrible. I do feel bad about it. I hope he succeeds in every single thing he does but I don’t want to be apart of any of it. He was what I considered to be one of my best friends. We went through an insane amount of shit together. My alcoholism, some seizures (I’m epileptic fun fact), a huge move back into the in laws place. He was just nice to have around and the three of us did so much together. So to watch him use my partner for money to get back into college and then just dip and never ask us how we are after starting our own family hurt. My partner and I have the same birthday so it’s not easy to forget lol and we heard from everyone except him. When it was his birthday we reached out. When he graduated college we congratulated him. He never wrote back. We had our daughter and didn’t hear a thing from him. We heard from everyone in the family. I even heard from his gf. I had only met her once before! So I’m just a little annoyed and I feel like I wasted a lot of time. Okay that’s it. If you made it this far you’re an mvp. Goodnight! 💜
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dailycharacteroption · 1 year ago
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Gloomblade (Fighter Archetype)
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(art by @Aszith on Twitter)
Ah, shadow magic, the branch of illusion magic centered on adding a bit of the quasi-real nature of the Plane of Shadow to your illusion to make them partially real and able to affect your foes. We’ve looked at that particular subject a few times on the blog, usually focusing on various spellcasters focused on using that shadowy power in various ways.
However, today we are looking at one of the rare quasi-magical fighter archetypes, one that draws upon shadow magic to pull any weapon they could possibly need from nothing, creating quasi-real weapons of shadow that hit as hard as the real thing.
Fans of previous editions of D&D might notice this sounds suspiciously similar to the soulknife class from 3.5’s Psionic Handbook, and they’d be right. This archetypes, as well as similar ones like the mindblade magus, definitely exist as homages to that particular concept while finding their own ways to be unique.
Gloomblades may be from regions where shadow magic is so pervasive that most anyone could pick up the basics and learn to incorporate it into their own style, or they might have been would-be casters that simply didn’t have what it takes to be illusionists but found this one secret to make sure their training wasn’t a total waste. Others might have been gifted or afflicted with this power by an outside force.
Whatever the source, these warriors always have a weapon whenever they need it, meaning they rarely ever have to spend money on arming themselves unless they happen upon a truly unique weapon, but most prefer to seek out items that bolster their other abilities further.
These warriors are more focused on agility and stealth than others, but their true ability lies in creating shadow weapons, drawing upon any weapon they can reasonably wield. At first they can only create one weapon, but later they can create two, and add additional abilities to either a single or twin weapon, though focusing on a single weapon lets them add more magical abilities.
Rather than specialize in individual weapons, gloomblades instead become intimately familiar with mastering their shadowblades, no matter the form they take. What’s more, they can use their quasi-real nature to alter them, stretching them to strike with reach, shaping throwing ones to fly further, warp them to hook into foes to shift them around, or harden them to pierce objects. The greater their mastery, the more they can do at once.
With this archetype, these fighters rarely ever need to spend money for their weapons budget. With that in mind, I recommend picking a few mainstay forms for your build so that you can take feats for those styles of combat rather than relying on more general feats all the time. Just remember that this archetype offers no support for ranged weapons beyond those that can be thrown, so you’ll probably have to pick up one of those for those rare occasions when you can’t just run up and hit things. Also consider taking exotic weapons proficiency at least once if you want to be able to add a shadowy truly exotic weapon to the mix.
What’s interesting about the powers of a gloomblade is that their shadowy constructs are not at risk of being disbelieved. Perhaps this is because of the relative small size of what they create with their shadows, the warrior’s focus solidifying them, or some secret they have not shared with more traditional shadow-casters. Might be worth exploring that in your setting.
Rather than being destroyed for being an untainted caligni, Asterfon was blessed by the owb masters of the dark folk with power to shape the shadows to make him an instrument of their will. However, as soon as he got the chance to, he ran, and now he is hunted as a blasphemer by his dark kindred.
From the lightless depths, some undine villages have heard the call of the Black Water. Those that have answered are able to shape shadow without compare as spellcasters and warriors, but they clearly have lost a part of themselves in the exchange.
Creatures of horror and darkness, the jack-o-lanterns haunt lands of superstition and fearful nights. They say that the most powerful of these plants, whose connection to the Grinning Lurker is greatest, need no stolen farming implements for weapons, and instead shape the shadows themselves into wicked edges.
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