#snape gets pegged

[storiesfromafan]

Dance Class 101

A/N: I come baring more fruits of my labor haha. Or rather this was a silly story I started a new nights ago after 11pm. It just spiraled from there.

Might do a part two. See what happens.

Also, forgive some of the informal wording. I blame being Australian lol.

Pairing: Mattheo x Slytherin Fem!Reader (more pining?)

They say school is meant to be a fun experience, learning new and usually useful things. And in any other House in Hogwarts, that would be the case. Unfortunately, for Slytherin fun was not a word Professor Snape knew, or rather despised, squashing all light in any room he was in. Currently in The Great Hall, during the Slytherin’s scheduled time for dance practise for the upcoming Yule Ball.

All attending students in Hogwarts were expected to participate in dance classes. So here you were, with your group of misfits. As your house all took seats around Professor Snape, who looked to be out of his comfort zone, you couldn’t miss those around you whispering to each other. Which was shortly lived when Snape ordered silence. Of course, everyone shut their mouths and sat up straight.

“Firstly, I detest that I have to teach you all to dance” Snape began, his voice sharp with authority. “But you all need to have some sort of formal etiquette for a ball. So, I am…forced to instruct you”. Ah, how that must have hurt to say.

There were sniggers and giggles at Snape’s words, which he called for silence again and got it quick smart.

“Secondly, I will remind each and every one of you that you will be representing Slytherin at The Yule Ball. So, I do not wish to hear of any of you acting in any way to lower our House” Snape stood proudly and rolled his sharp gaze over every student. “You are Slytherin. We are a proud house, do not sully it”.

Mattheo, Theodore and Lorenzo; whom were all sitting before you, started to snicker. Which you stopped with a slap to each of the back of their heads, just like any mother. Mattheo turned back with a glare, to which you smiled at before gesturing for him to turn back around and focusing on Snape.

Back to the lesson at hand; dancing 101. The girls rather giddy, the boys wanting to run from the room. Snape uncomfortable. And the female Professor being his dance partner wishing she had done something better with her career. All in all, this was to be some kind of afternoon. Starting off with two Professor’s stiffly demonstrating The Waltz. How the student population bearing witness to the scene before them kept themselves in check was a mystery. Alright, not entirely a mystery but more not wanting to cop Snape’s wrath for laughing. Plain and simple.

Finally, it came time for the observers to move to practical. Reluctantly all students rose from their seats, shuffling about and pairing up awkwardly. You stood looking around the room trying to pick out a dance partner. You didn’t want anyone who was handsy or flirty, nor did you want someone who has two left feet.

“Looking for me?” asked an all too familiar cocky voice behind you.

Turning around you found Mattheo standing there confidently. Oh, you will enjoy knocking him down a peg.

“Oh no” you replied off handedly, “I’m looking for a less pompous ass to dance with”.

He shot you a glare.

“Then you must be looking for me?” Questioned Theodore stepping up and slapping Mattheo on the shoulder. “Sorry mate”.

You looked to Theodore with a blank look. “Sorry, nor am I looking for his partner in pompousness either”.

Mattheo laughed shoving Theodore. “Tough luck, mate”.

Theodore shot his friend a dark look. “Hey, at least I didn’t get rejected first”.

That sobered Mattheo, and both boys glared at the other before turning back to you.

Thankfully that was the moment Lorenzo stepped in and swept you away. “Sorry lads, she was waiting for me”.

You laughed as Lorenzo twirled you both around. Alright, he won. “To be clear I wasn’t waiting for Lorenzo, but with that save, he has earned his place as my dance partner. Sorry”.

Lorenzo laughed as both Mattheo and Theodore shoved the other before shuffling off to find other partners. Which wouldn’t be hard. Every girl in this school would give their soul to get close to Mattheo, he was the Slytherin heart throb after all. And Theodore had his own club of fans too. So, they would be fine.

But a part of you regretted rejecting Mattheo. Blame the two-year crush on the curly mop head, who had just partnered up with Daphne Greengrass. The way she smiled at him as she placed her hand on his shoulder while he stepped closer, it made you sick to your stomach. Not to mention your blood boiling when she laughed at something Mattheo said.

“What are you growling at?” Questioned Lorenzo, before turning you both to see what held your attention. “Ah, I see”.

“Ah, I see? You see nothing” you retorted defiantly, turning away from the nauseating and infuriating scene.

Lorenzo shot you a knowing look. “Please (Y/N/N), I’m not stupid. I’ve known about your affections probably before you even came to terms with them” he chuckled, while you pouted.

“I repeat, you see nothing. End of story”.

Lorenzo spun you around, making you see the pair across from you both, before turning you away again. “It’s alright, I am not offended I’m not the eye of your desire” he poked your side. “But Theodore owes me a butterbeer”.

You swatted Lorenzo’s shoulder. “Don’t you dare say a word! Ah, of nothing that isn’t true” you sputtered, attempting to deny your crush.

Lorenzo brought you close. “Your secret is safe with me (Y/N/N). Mum’s the word”.

You one hundred and ten percent believed Lorenzo. Out of the three, he was more the voice of reason. While Mattheo and Theodore were Dumb and Dumber. But to be clear, you did not think them dumb, far from it for they could be evil geniuses if they applied themselves. They were goof balls that didn’t always read a person before opening their mouths.

Once everyone was paired up, Snape called for attention once more. Taking the proper stance with the female Professor, Snape instructed all students to do the same. Lorenzo stood comically tall, with a snooty look on his face while holding out his left hand out to you. Following his lead, you mirrored his stance and look, before dramatically placing your right hand in his. He then placed his right hand on your waist, pulling you closer forcefully. You couldn’t help it; a snigger came from your lips as you placed your left hand on his shoulder. Yes, Lorenzo was the smart choice. Laughter was the best way to forget about Mattheo and Daphne.

While you were having fun in Snape’s dreary presence, Mattheo was watching every moment just now. A wave of jealousy washing over him as Lorenzo pulled you close and received a snigger. Sure, he could see you were both goofing off. But he hated it wasn’t him you were having fun with.

Mattheo acted aloof, and teased you, but it was to hide the feelings the boy had for you. Out of all the girls in the school, you were the first one to become his friend. Never flirting or going shy. Being your unapologetic self through and through.

The friendship he had with you was what made it hard to have feelings for you. Your friendship was something he treasured, and he didn’t want to ruin it. For if he lost you, Mattheo would be devastated. But he also disliked seeing his two mates’ taking your attention away from him and having fun without him.

“Hey, Snape’s talking” Daphne whispered, drawing Mattheo’s attention from you and Lorenzo.

Snape proceeded to instruct and show you all the basic steps for The Waltz.

“Male’s lead. Starting with your left foot, you are going to step forward” Snape began. “Females follow. Starting with your right foot, you are going to step back”.

All students followed Snape’s instruction. This is where many partners learned that the person, they paired up with couldn’t tell left from right, forward and backwards. Which lead to some soft laughter and angry comments.

You and Lorenzo didn’t need to worry. Both of you were coordinated. Comically, but smooth, you did as instructed. As well was Mattheo and Daphne.

“Next” Snape commanded, silence fell once more. “Males, bring you right foot forward and to the right, then close your left foot next to your right. Females, bring your left foot back and to the left, then close with right foot next to your left”. Snape of course demonstrated this movement for everyone.

Once again, coordination was a flower that didn’t grow in many gardens. While you and Lorenzo were flawless. Along with Mattheo and Daphne. Finally, everyone was at the same step.

“Male’s, step back with your right foot. Females, step forward with your left foot” Snape instructed doing as he said. “Males, bring your left foot back and to the left, then close your right foot next to your left. Females, step forward with your right foot and to the right, then close your left foot next to your right”.

Once more everyone followed the instruction and demonstration. Happy to report, this time there were more coordinated students. You followed Lorenzo’s lead, and once more you were both flawless in your movements, prompting you both to smile at the other. Mattheo and Daphne not far behind you both, just as flawless.

Snape pulled away from the female Professor, like he was slightly burned by a flame. “That is the basic steps for The Waltz. I will now give you time to practice the steps together before music is introduced, and we work on timing to tempo”.

Both you and Lorenzo chuckled at Snape, before getting back to the task at hand. Taking position, you both did the step’s Snape had instructed. Once the first square was done, you both continued. Eventually feeling comfortable with the steps, the snooty comical sides came back. Dramatically doing the steps. And soon you had a small audience of the students around you. They laughed and softly cheered. With the final steps to close off the square, Lorenzo spun you out and you both theatrically bowed and curtsied.

“(Y/L/N) and Berkshire!” Called Snape. “Knock off the nonsense”.

You both quickly moved back into position and went back to dancing properly. Neither wanting to face the wrath of Snape. But flashing each other a smile, you enjoyed the silliness.

“Real smooth, getting on Snape’s radar” Theodore commented, moving closer to you both. “Best to stop the shenanigans”.

“Oh? Jealous Nott?” Lorenzo asked with a smirk.

Theodore laughed. “Far from it mate. I don’t want Snape on my case”.

He was right. No one ever wants to be on Snape’s bad side. So silently you and Lorenza agree to pull back on the silliness and take it all a bit more seriously. But it was so hard when this type of dance was boring, and so would the music.

After some time, Snape brought attention back to him, and proceeded to teach the next part. And let’s just say you thought many of the students lacked coordination before, it was ten times worse when music was introduced. Yet in yours and Lorenzo’s case, you both weren’t too bad. At first there was some miss timed steps and even stepping on his foot, but after the first square, you both got smoother and flowed nicely. Even getting praise from Snape.

Unfortunately for Mattheo, his partner took longer to grasp timing with music. And not to mention the amount of times Daphne stepped on his feet. Yes, she managed to step on both multiple times. Eventually she got better, but not quick enough before Snape called an end to dance class. Many students sighed and silently thanked who ever had been listening to their pleas.

Walking out of The Great Hall, you and the three boys headed for the nearby courtyard to relax after an eventful dance lesson. Lounging around under a tree you all recalled moments of the class, from the good, the bad and the tragic.

“I don’t know how that woman could have danced with Snape” mused Theodore. “He’s so wound tight”, he proceeded to sit up stiffly, making you all laugh.

“Bet she’s rethinking her career choice” mused Lorenzo, again making you all laugh.

“I gotta know, what was it like dancing with Daphne?” Questioned Theodore lighting a cigarette. “No doubt you made her day, as she has the biggest crush on you”.

You tensed at the question, and Lorenzo saw it. He gave you a soft look, showing his concern. But you just gave him a small, sad smile.

“It was alright, I guess” replied Mattheo, not noting your silent conversation with your friend. “She’s not that graceful, my feet are witnesses to that”. He laughed shaking his head. “But she wasn’t bad to be with”.

You all joined him in laughter, only yours not as strong as your companions. That last sentence he spoke hit you. Could Mattheo like Daphne? Surely not, she was lack-lustre compared to other girls.

“You going to ask her to The Yule Ball?” Lorenzo asked, side glancing you to gauge your reaction. He wasn’t doing it to hurt you, he wanted you to know if you should get your hopes up or not.

Mattheo snatched the cigarette from Theodore while thinking over the question. Did he want to ask Daphne to The Yule Ball? No. Did he want to ask you? Yes. But the two parts of him were at war. He wanted to ask you, take you because your company was all he needed. But then, the other part of him said you probably wouldn’t go with him, you’d want to go with someone else. Someone you fancied.

“Maybe…” Mattheo thought taking a drag of the cigarette. “See what happens”.

Theodore laughed. “Don’t wait too long to ask her, or any girl really”.

Now it was you who laughed. “Oh please Theo. Any girl who is asked by either of you would say yes. They would even dump their date to go with any of you”.

It was true. You knew from all the gossiping girls; they have all said it at some point. They would dump their date, even their boyfriend for any of your three friends. And you had a front row seat to watch Mattheo with some other girl. You wish you could say it didn’t bother you, but that would be lying. For every flirtation, every flavour of the month killed you to bear witness too.

Theodore scoffed. “You sound jealous my dear (Y/N/N)”.

You laughed dryly. “Oh please. Me? Jealous of you lot? Ah, no”.

  “I think you are” retorted Theodore sitting up straight. “Jealous we’ll have hot dates, while you will end up with someone lower on the food chain, or no date at all”.

Both Theodore and Mattheo laughed, though Mattheo’s was forced and to hide his true feelings. Which was his dislike for his friends’ words.

You felt anger rise in you from Theodore’s words, your cheeks flushing in annoyance. Deciding it was best to remove yourself, you got up from your spot and straightened out your uniform.

“I find your words to be hurtful and callous. So, what if my date end’s up being less than any of you? Does that diminish their worth? What makes you an excellent judge on that?” you retorted with slight venom. “And if I was to go dateless, what about it? It’s not mandatory to have a date”.

Theodore looked up to you, a smirk on his face. “No, it is not mandatory. But people would look at you like you’re pathetic, practically a leper. Am I right Mattheo?”

Your nostrils flared from Theodore’s brazen words, before your heated gaze was on the mentioned boy. You watched Mattheo closely, silently hoping he would disagree with Theodore. That he would stand up for you.

Mattheo swallowed. He knew this was it. “Sorry (Y/N/N), Theo’s got a point”.

As the words rolled off his tongue, each word scorching the appendage, did Mattheo regret those words. He hated himself. And the hurt look you gave him just about killed him. He was about to correct himself before you said your goodbyes and took off.

“Good job idiots” Lorenzo sighed throwing a rock at both his friends, before taking off after you.

[kheta]

Toxic Severus x Lily x James i cbf writing a wider story to go with this scenario/scenes so... have it as is bc I actually like it. And yess, delulu and oblivious James in amongst a toxic snily codependency is *kiss* tw: child-abuse, somewhat graphic depictions

‘You said it was getting better Sev,’ Evans’ voice was filled with a slow burning anger that James was attuned to. It was a bit shocking, really, everyone knew that Evans had the biggest soft spot for the slimy snake, sticking up for him at every turn. As if the Slytherin had any right to her kindness, filled to the brim with dark magic as he was.

Snivellus sighed, turning an equally as unexpected glare on the Gryffindor. James felt his anger whirling away, a tornado inside of his stomach. 

He knew the prat was every bit the bastard that James had pegged him for! Of course he’d save the way he treated Evan’s for their private moments. Too scared of the retribution from Gryffindor if they knew what he did to Evans.

The grins and laughter the two shared were obviously faked, Evans just wasn’t accustomed to how awful Slytherin students were, probably got all infatuated by the first pureblood that gave her a second glance, as if James himself couldn’t treat her better, couldn’t protect her more than the git standing before them.

‘He is Lils, why do you think he asked Cal to hire me? He wants to do better, honest,’ the nickname comes out of nowhere, as does the gentle tone. If he didn’t know Snivellus better, he’d think the soft admonishment was true, that the snake actually cared for a Muggleborn. But Slytherin’s are good actors, all that cunning had to go somewhere, right? James had been watching the snake for five years now and none of this git’s manufactured kindness had ever been on display before. 

‘He just– gets a bit scared sending me back to Hogwarts. You know how ma was treated, he doesn’t like the reminder.’

Evans sends out a short, aggrieved huff, dragging the snake to sit beside her as if he hadn’t thrown a cutting curse at James just last term. As if the Christmas holidays had somehow made the Snivellus a better person.

‘Sev, he’s– What he does isn’t right, he never should have to work to be a better Da, that’s fucking bonkers.’

No, what was truly bonkers is that Lily Evans had learnt how to swear over the Christmas holidays. 

Again Snivellus’ mask begins to crack, he pulls to the corner and sends a withering glare at Evans, of the sort he would never do in front of the rest of Gryffindor. James glared at him harder, grip over his wand tightening, a vindication settling over his standing form. Evans was too good for the snake, didn’t realise that his playing nice in front of other students was just a front to manipulate her, but James and Sirius knew better. Had been searching for the cracks in the fake friendship they’d had for years now.

‘Lils just drop it! It’s not like I’m an amazing son,’ he spits the words acidically, levering Evans with a smouldering, noxious glare he usually reserves for James, ‘And he’s a fair lot better than any other Da in Ends, he drove me here, didn’t he? Got me a job. Says sorry when he gets a bit into his cups. Let me keep going to Hogwarts even after Ma carked it, he’s no Harrison Evans but he fucking tries!’

Instead of backing down at the anger, walking away and ignoring Snivellus like she ignores James, Evans comes alive at the anger. Whipped over to face him, face flushing as she growls out, harrowing her own angry, captivating, green-tinged stare at Snape and lifting a finger to his chest.

‘My Da’s not perfect Sev, but he doesn’t fucking beat me blue!’

What?

‘It wasn’t even a beating, so what my arm’s a mess–’

‘No, no don’t you dare act like it’s all bloody okay! If my Da did anything like that you’d want me to te–’

‘If you fucking tell anyone I will–’

‘So what, I just let you go home and hope he doesn’t kill you this ti–’

‘Da would never!’

‘He would Sev! He’s been hitting you for as long as I’ve known you, why can’t you just accept–’

‘There’s nothing to accept Lils,’ Snape cries out, holding his hands up to cup her pointed fingers, ‘I’m telling you it’s not like that, Da loves me. He does, so just shut it!’

James wanted nothing more than to actually disappear. Disapparate? End up in another compartment, for sure. One that didn’t have Snape looking at Evans with the sort of pleading he had never once given to the Marauders. Needed to get away from the soft droop of his piercing raven-black eyes, to not notice how Snape’s lips went from dry and chapped to moist as he bit down, truly looking at Evans. Not through or past or over her like he did James. 

Snape wasn’t supposed to beg, wasn’t supposed to look at Evans with reverence, as if their weird, awful, wrong, fake-friendship meant anything to the slimy snake. Snape was a tome of dark magic and acidic words and gut-punching spells that masqueraded in a students body. He wasn’t– He wasn’t like Siri, stuck in an awful house, because Snape’s family had to love him, right? Snape made sense, a dark-arts loving snake in a family of dark-arts loving snakes, Snape proved that in their very first meeting. Siri was a Gryffindor stuck in a snake family, Snape– He had to be telling the truth. Evans just cared too much about the snake to know what normal discipline was like, Muggles were probably less strict with their kids. Maybe– maybe his dad never hit him and neither did Remy’s, but their parents were soft, Snape probably just had parents like Pete, who could get a little rou–

Godric, he felt sick. This was all wrong, he wanted to prank them, not watch enviously as the sleazy, greasy snake he hated held hands with the most beautiful witch in their year.

Instead of disappearing, James sits before the odd Slytherin-Gryffindor duo he had hated and he watched. This didn't make sense. That’s the only reason he was watching, he wanted it to make sense. Wanted Snape to show his true colours and Evans to learn the errors of her ways, picking a no-name Pureblood family like Snape to attach to, instead of an established family like Potter.

Nothing made sense anymore, because Evans moved to take Snape's tattered robe from his shoulders and James was going to have to watch them shag, wasn’t he? That was an awful thought, stirring inside of his stomach even as his eyes stayed spelled to the scene. 

He was going to watch the girl he had been asking out for the past year shag his mortal enemy. James didn’t want to believe the rumours going around, because even as a Muggleborn Evan’s was the prettiest, smartest witch he knew, but there was no other reason for a proper young lady to be unbuttoning another young man's shirt and it made sense really. Of course sex was why the Slytherin kept Evans around, what use did a no good pureblood like him have in a fragile, naive Muggleborn like Evans?

Except– Except today any form of sense kept unravelling because Snape’s school shirt was unbuttoned, falling to his long, floppy elbows and Evans was crying. Rolling his eyes, James paid no mind to the stab of disappointment aching somewhere near his waist, only grinning at the reaction. So they probably hadn’t ever shagged and looking at Snape’s greasy, lanky body had made her realise she could do better, there was no way a greasy bat like…

Snape had abs?

No. No! How dare he?

Snape was stupidly tall with an ugly mug and greasy hair and pasty skin. 

And yet. Abs. Now he didn’t know why Evans would be crying, because Merlin was Snape a bit more sculpted than he had ever presumed. Still wiry, with a small waist, pasty skin and a trail of dark, thick hairs snaking from his belly button, down to his trousers, but there was a concave near his stomach and chiselled, defined lines from his pecs down. Merlin above even James could admit if you put a bag over his head, Snape wouldn’t be half bad looking and then–

Well, then James’ roaming gaze caught on to what exactly made Evans gasp, what caused her to tear up and run her fingers over Snape’s sickly pale skin.

Snape had said his arm was a mess, which it was, mottled a blue darker than even the night sky. The bruises crept up in his shoulder in odd bunches. Snape talked about this mess casually, the same way Petey talked about his parents giving him a growling. Like it was just normal for Snape to walk around with his dad’s shoe size imprinted like a sick temporary tattoo across his shoulder.

Evans wasn’t overreacting. Snape’s dad might actually kill him, he thinks nostrils flaring. Gaze wandering over to the stark, yellow-green hand marks lining his elongated neck and the large, almost scabbed maroon-ish bite mark at his chest.

‘Sev– did he…?’ Evans ran her fingers up Snape’s chest and to the bite mark, her fingers making delicate circles around the wound causing his stomach to whirl oddly, her voice cracking as she whispered.

He wanted to sick up at the thought, though he was still unnervingly enraptured by the scene before him. Shivering at the touch, Snivelly snapped his eyes to Evans at the last minute, a weak, harsh laugh leaving his throat.

‘No– Merlin, no Lils, I told you I was necking with Alex for the summer.’

Evans pulls back at the admittance, a cute blush consuming her face as she glanced away with pursed lips. Despite the visage she was and the slow building relief from not having to watch his crush shag someone else, James couldn’t help but feel underwhelmed at the admittance.

Snape managed to snag a bird, but James couldn’t? 

Though, he thought once more staring at the duo, he didn’t just want any old bird like Snivellus. He wanted a proper, gorgeous flower. Pale and tall and beautiful, with brains and bite to boot.

‘Right. Did Alex also…’ Here she trails her hands from the bite mark to the handprints, her own slighter fingers not able to mask the rough bruises left there.

Merlin, did Snape like it rough? Did he like it when James pushed him around? The thought flopped somewhere uncomfortable for him to hang onto, his warm, walnut coloured eyes dilating at the prospect. Was that why Snape always fought back against his betters? Even he had to know that the Noble and Valiant House of Potter ranked far above most normal purebloods. Did he have to pull back on the pranks if Snape did like it like that?

Empathetically no, is the decision Snivelly makes for him, looking to the side, his long raven hair ghosting over his shoulder as he shook his head, making a mesmerising curtain against his pale neck

If anything that made it worse, something which Evans agreed on if the tight pulling of her ginger brows meant anything.

Wizardingfolks didn’t leave bruises like that on anyone's skin, much less their own kids. Even Siri’s shitty parents wouldn’t knock him about with their own hands, it was unheard of in Wizarding society, children were to be treasured and disciplined, not treated like blimmin’ house-elves in Dark Families.

‘Sev, just– just think about moving in with us, please.’

Okay, even James had to admit that was a terrible offer. Lovely as Evans was to look at, she was still a Muggleborn. Who would give up living with their own family for living with Muggles?  Not even Siri would, right? 

Would he… If it meant not being with his parents?

Merlin, would Pete? Could he just; offer it to them like Evans had? Without restraint or boundaries?

‘I don’t need your charity Lily.’

‘It’s not charity, it’s the soddin’ right thing to do, Tuney’s started Uni and ma and da would be thril–’

‘Your parents hate me.’

‘My parents don’t hate you, they don’t even know you Sev, you don’t let them try.’

Unable to be swayed by the witches' argument, Snape pursed his lips and looked away, his own long fingers coming up to hastily pull and button up his school shirt.

This left James with the unwanted realisation that he was stuck under his cloak, in a closed train compartment with the only two students his year happy to hex the life out of him if they knew he was there. Thankfully enough, after an agonising two hours of listening to them talk about potions and charms and some oaf named Dursley, the two begin to nod off.

Snape is first, his answers becoming more slurred as he continues to lean on the window to his right. After his answers become painfully incoherent, Evans sits in silence, her own eyes tracking the space between the two of them. In an unexpected show of audacity, when Snape is very firmly asleep, Evans leans her head against his broad shoulder, feet tucked under her inexplicably short skirt, the smooth valley of skin from her knees to ankle bare for all to see and her usually bright, emerald eyes coming to a soft, gentle close. He waits for a few minutes, watching as their breathing somehow becomes more in sync and opens the compartment door. Neither move to hex him, or move at all, Evans happily groping at Snivelly’s robes and Snivellus holding his arms to his chest, as if a beautiful witch wasn’t lying against his arm for the taking.

James leaves the compartment more keyed up than ever, a difficult, clawing anger at his chest. The two losers don’t stir for a bit as he slides the door shut with a firm, sudden snap.

✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦ ─── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ── ✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦

There’s a million and one thoughts racing through his brain on a well-trimmed cleansweep, twisting and turning as they look for the golden snitch, the proper answer to these thoughts. The thoughts had in fact been racing through his brain for hours now. He trudges to where he had left his friends, sliding the door open and wrenching his cloak off immediately. 

Remy’s laughter dies down as he peers at James with a wide, amber-tinged curiosity. 

Not one to fully think through his decisions and having sat on this tantalising idea for far too long, James bunches his cloak to his school bag and pierces his still laughing friends with an inquisitive glance. The snitch was gleaming in his mind, Pete and Siri just had to move so James could grab it. Could hold onto the idea that Evans had unknowingly released to the aether. Neither Pete nor Siri notice him, too caught up in a game of exploding snap that had left Remy with some rather glaring soot marks and a messy bush of brown hair.

‘Move in with me,’ he states with more confidence than he feels.

Ocean blue and hazy grey eyes whip towards his direction, a sea of black curls and a soft trail of blonde hair both tilted to the side as they take in their missing friend. Neither spoke, their eyes darting around the room to look for whom exactly James was speaking to.

‘Both your parents are shite and I’ve had more money in Gringotts than I’ll ever need, move in with me.’ Both Pete and Siri don’t look inclined to say yes, their faces twisted to something almost Snape-like. He steamrolls ahead, voice steadily burning as he keeps talking. If a Muggleborn like Evans could make the offer, so could Heir Potter. ‘Mum and Dad would love to have other kids around the estate and I’m sick of seeing you two come back to Hogwarts worse for wear. We’ll be able to get it approved, a formal adoption and everything. You could be Peter and Sirius Potter and no one would bat an eye.’

Not particularly true, the Black’s could protest, but the status the Potter family held before their migration to Great Britain was greater than the Status the Black family held. Contentious for more current generations who mocked even the Malfoy’s for their migration from France in the 12th Century, but noble and with extreme merit considering the Potter Predecessors and all their achievements. Just because they were different continents, didn’t mean his family was powerless here, they didn’t need the stinkin’ Blacks to uphold their status. James could pull his friends into his family and make sure they never turned up like Snivellus, bruised to the days.

Neither Siri or Pete reply, both nervously clutching the cards in their grip. James was right to be worried, they had to know that. That’s why they were nervous. They knew they deserved better.

‘Jamie–’ starts Siri, voice dropping to a soft candour, his own face settling on a malcontent frown, ‘That’s… It’s a sweet offer mate, but my Uncle and I have a plan, you know that. I’ll get away from my family as soon as we graduate.’

Peter pipes up as well, ‘I know they might seem a bit, mean. But my parents genuinely care about me Jamie, I’m not gonna give up on them.’

James thinks of large, purple and green bruises lighting a pale, breathing canvas up and bristles at the words.

‘I don’t care,’ he spits, arms crossing over his chest as he plops down next to Remy, ‘Parents shouldn’t– Shouldn’t do that to their kids.’

‘They’re not doing anything Jamie, Siri’s parents like the Dark Arts and mine are strict, you really don’t need to make such a big offer.’

Petey’s wrong, because Evans made the offer and Snape has a helluva streak of bruises and Petey doesn’t even let himself eat to fullness, too worried about his mum’s apparent strictness.

‘It’s not normal.’ He cries, hands coming to slap against his thigh, seeing only a loop of healing bruises across otherwise unblemished skin. ‘You– You’re mum’s made you cry more than any snake at school and Siri’s mum made him cast an unforgivable, you– you can’t be happy there Petey.’

‘Mum might be a bit over-bear–’

‘You lost three stone this summer and she said that you were finally starting to look like a normal blok–’

‘Salazar’s bleeding hide Jamie! Why are you so strung about shite said in the pa–’

It’s hard, arguing against two people instead of one.

‘Don’t start Sirius! After everything your parents have said, after that howler in–’

‘So Mum was mad! It’s not a big deal!’

‘Mum’s aren’t supposed to call their son’s failures!’ He shouts in exasperation.

Peter snarls at him, his usually kind eyes seething, voice coming out of clenched teeth, ‘Not everyone has perfect parents James, you know this!’

‘They don’t need to be perfect, they just need to be ki–’

‘Oh, put a fucking sock in it Jamie! Why’re you trying to air our dirty laundry out for everyone to feck–’

‘It shouldn’t be dirty laundry, there shouldn’t be anything to air out, if your parents actually loved you–’

‘If you finish that sentence James Fleamont Potter I will hex you to pieces!’

Godric almighty he was so mad, couldn’t see beyond the crimson narrowing his vision. Peter and Sirius were wrong, were lying to him just like Snape was lying to Evans. That's the only reason Peter would pretend to be so mad at him. James would not let it go, wouldn’t let them think for a second that they were worth less than Severus fucking Snape, wouldn’t let them think that whatever weird, undisclosed behaviour their parents set on them was in any way right.

‘Why? Because I’m right? Because you know that normal parents don’t scream at you for eating dinner, Petey? Don’t lock their fridges and cupboards as punishment? Because parents who care aren’t supposed to make you use blood quills!?’

Sirius glares at the reminder.

‘Once! My parents used one blood quill, to teach me a lesson. Once, Jamie. Stop acting like this is a big, fecking deal!’

Sirius sounded so anguished as he screamed, his voice rising and quivering in the air, wet with his anger, the cards he had flying to the ground as he pulled James to his feet, grip unrelenting on his collar.

‘It is!’ He shouts, absolutely red with fury, channelling his inner Evans maybe, ‘It’s a big deal because I don’t know if the next time I see you after Summer Break is gonna be with the both of you shoved in a fucking coffin. It’s a big deal because parents are supposed to love you, supposed to care for you not– Not whatever the fuck your parents are doing now!’

Sirius doesn’t answer, his usually delightful features pulled into a withering glare, channelling as much Snape as James had been channelling Evan’s. Sirius chucks James with a frustrated snarl to the ground. Peter doesn’t answer the accusations either, chucking his cards down and moodily looking at the wall behind them.

They’re left with a sharp bang as Sirius leaves the compartment, all the quasi-confidence James had held crumbling as Peter stays silent and Remy just bumps their shoulders together, as if the contact could somehow pull James’ words from the air and lead the Marauders to the familiar, happy, camaraderie-based silence they had once held. He doesn’t know what to do now, so stuck in their regular routine to figure out where this had all fallen apart. Stupid fucking Snivellus and Evans, making James out to be the bad guy to his friends. Silently, James fumes, too lost in his anger to see why everything had fallen to pieces.

He was just being a Gryffindor, like Evans, why were his friends more mad than Snivelly at the inquisition?

✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦ ─── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ── ✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦

The anger does not abate come morning, left to stew as he and his friends had stormed away, uncaring of the feast before him. Left to stew the next day, when Sirius and Peter pointedly waited for James to sit in their usual spot at back of Charms and made their way to the very front, leaving him with Remy’s shy smile and quiet humour. Left to stew in Defense, when Remy had wordlessly clasped James’ wrist and dragged him to the side when they were asked to pick partners.

It all comes to head a few weeks later, when they’ve got a break between classes and instead of mucking about with him, Sirius and Peter are down at the Lake with the girls. Its taking all of James' admittedly weak self-control to not pull his wand out, cast the incarcerous spell and haul his friends back to the Potter Estate, where they will be safe from any harm. 

Remy, in true him fashion, hasn’t yet figured out how to deal with any of their anger and has instead decided to keep James away from Siri and Petey as if the distance could somehow fix whatever he broke between them that weird, awful first day back at Hogwarts.

Coming onto nearly fifteen days from then, James knows his temper is frayed more so than usual. He’s supposed to be the one with the ideas, the one to push the Marauders forward. Instead he’s standing under an archway watching his friends like a stranger, Remus going on about getting a head start on their studies.

Seeing Sirius flirt with Meadows, James can’t appreciate Remus’ kindness. His friends were wrong, were lying to him and were frankly, being stupid and ungrateful.

There was only one other family who had migrated to Great Britain pre-12th Century and could claim to have an equal amount of acclaim as the Potter family, as far as James knows though, that family is less than a decade away from extinction. Not even the Noble and Striking House of Malfoy or the Malevolent and Acrimonious House of Lestrange could contest if the Potter’s wished to adopt from the almost ruined House of Pettigrew. Siri’s parents could be dicks about the whole thing, but if they didn’t want to cause a scandal in Pureblood Society by revealing their treatment of their Heir Apparent, the Black’s would do well to hold their tongue.

James was giving them a chance at freedom, at kindness for the sake of kindness, not for some weird screwed up power play like the Pettigrew’s and Black’s. He knows he can be a bit short-sighted at times, but really he was doing this for them.

Glaring at his friends, he sees a curtain of red near Meadow’s own black curls and feels his anger pulse to the sky. 

This was all Evans' fault. If the know-it-all bookworm hadn’t planted this idea in his head, James could still have his friends sitting and laughing with him, not– Not sitting away from him, ignoring him and rejecting him just like Evans did and Snape did and huffing, his eyes flicker to the biggest source of his consternation.

Snivellus, sat away from all his friends like the freak he is, hiding the damning things his parents did to him, just like James hid what Siri and Petey’s parents did to them.

The thoughts keep tangling in his head and before he knows it, before he can think better of it, before he can remember that there are other students around, he’s stalking to the area where Snivellus is sitting alone, huddled over a dark tome, the shade of the trees casting shadows on his skin.

He knows Evans is near, had seen her. He doesn’t care. This is all their fault. If Evans hadn’t– If Snape hadn’t.

Godric, he does not know what to do with the well of anger inside of him, how to dispel the furious conglomerate of emotions and memories stirring within. Something whispers in his mind, a vindictive voice he rarely indulges in.

Go on then, it purrs, he deserves it.

He does. 

Remus is coming after him, his voice soft, biting in the ways only Remus knows how to bite; softly, without malice yet filled with fervour. 

‘Levicorpus!’ He shouts, dangling Snape in the air. Snape’s wand slips to the ground from his pocket. 

‘James, knock it off!’ 

Who bloody well cares Remus! It’s Snivellus, Snivellus who started this screwed up thing. And it’s him who would end it, thinks James. If- if Peter and Sirius understood what James was scared of, what could happen to them, then they’ll get it. They’ll get why he’s being so protective. 

They couldn’t end up like Snivelus. 

Some people come around to gawk, he can feel their stares. He hopes Siri’s in the group, hope Petey recognises that this shit isn’t normal

‘You think you’re so smart don’t you Snape. Lying and hiding behind your thick books. Being a complete prat to Evans. Well you’re not. You’re a lying, cheating, cowardly snake!’ James reckons he sounds a bit like a banshee, not that it matters because Snape just glares at him, his eyes smouldering with the same heat James can feel in the pit of his stomach.

Good.

‘You think you’re brave, Snivellus, think you’re the hero–’

‘Potter! Put him down right this–’

‘Oh fuck off Evans!’ The clearing is so quiet that a pin-drop, a drop of rain could disturb them. Everything is so red he can’t even be bothered to care. ‘Like you’re any better. You walk around here like you’re the sweetest thing since treacle tarts, well you’re not. You’re just as much a conniving, greedy snake as this bastard.’

Someone– Remus he thinks vaguely– puts their hand on his shoulder, he shrugs it off, meeting Snape’s wide eyes.

Striding forward so he’s just under Snape’s floating figure, James thereafter drops Snape indelicately, catching his collar in his hand.

No one else dares to move around them, too shocked that James Potter himself had shouted insults at not just a Gryffindor, but at the Gryffindor, Lily Evans.

‘Think you’re so strong Potter, picking on someone without a wand.’ Snape’s growl is low, sending goosebumps running across his neck.

‘Think you’re so strong Snape,’ he mocks back, eyes rolling, bringing the older boy so close their faces just about touch, ‘Hiding your bruises.’

Snape pales at the implication, his previous bravado gone as he thrashes in James’ grip.

‘Get your hands off me you freak!’

Nothing, nothing matters anymore. Snivellus is a liar. Evans a coward. James the bad guy. None of it means anything anymore. Something blurry and tenuous whips around his brain.

‘What, scared of me, Snape? I thought you were used to being hurt. Isn’t that what this shit is!’

The thoughts aren’t connecting clearly, they're floating around somewhere and he’s ripping at Snape’s robes. Snape is trying to shove him off and there’s a high-pitched scream and scuffle going on behind them. Not that it matters– James is stronger than Snape, for all Snape packs a mean punch, James is the one on the Quidditch team.

He’s a bit unclear how it happens, but in seconds Snape’s robe has been unbuckled and unknotted, sitting against his shoulders and bearing all those horrible, ugly marks for everyone to see. James traces them with his bespectacled gaze like an artist looking at their muse

James doesn’t know what he wants to say, can feel a jumble of words twisting inside of him, but there’s a blur of ginger and he’s suddenly on the ground, six foot worth of ivory skin and bones straddling him and the girl of his dreams laying harsh, decidedly manly punches on him.

Godric, even for a coward Evans’ is enrapturing in her fury. He can’t think of anything else because unfortunately, she lays a quick, sudden fist to his face and he’s out quicker than a casted nox.

✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦ ─── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ── ✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦

i had originally planned to make a story from this where james has to grow tf up because peter can't condone what james did to severus and sirius is pissed that james made him empathise with severus and james still doesn't know why he's so obsessed with severus and lily, especially now that severus is the one icing him out and lily is hating him. and after like slow-burn revenge story levels of grovelling, he becomes friends with snily. this friendship is what brings the marauders back together because peter and remus can see how much james has grown and that his apologies are sincere and thoughtful and sirius is so jealous he can't keep being distant because like... he's james' best friend? not snape or evans? and then sirius chills a little because he can see the doechaser friendship rapidly develop into the catalyst that brings all of them into a relo...it's just like. the planning for that became too much. and i have no clue what amount of begging would actually make severus or lily look at james favourbly in this tbh.

[cuffmeinblack]

Andrew voice lines 🖤

"I suppose it's nice to have anyone wave at you...even a statue of a knight."

Is he lonely? 🥺 What a sad thing to say.

"Sebastian is rather good after all."

After the way Andrew stares at Seb in DADA I'm not surprised he said this.

"I've heard rumours of a goblin painter travelling about. Don't tell Binns, he'd lecture us on goblin art for a week."

"I'm bored with goblin rebellions. I'd like to rebel against discussing them any further."

Standard Binns bashing. Not a history fan, then. Or at least the way his professor teaches it.

"I'd much rather be studying art. That's historic too, isn't it?"

I wonder if he's much of an artist himself. I pegged him as a reader, and of course literature is a form of art, but perhaps he'd also paint or play an instrument too (I had him as a painter in his spare time in Coming Home). He'd make a very cute flautist.

"Accidentally transfigured your book work into a toad? Weasley's never going to believe that."

"A happy beast is a giving beast. That's what professor Howin always says at least. If we treat them well, they'll treat us well."

Maybe he likes beasts, maybe he's just agreeing with a professor. I think he'd like something small and cuddly as a pet. I like him as a cat person because a puffskein seems too exuberant for him, rolling around and knocking over his tea/paints/books.

"Potions requires more creativity than most realises. Really quite rewarding at times."

This feels like a very Garreth thing to say, and also something I say about Snape; a brilliant potioneer sees brewing as more of an art form than simply following a recipe. Andrew obviously has a creative flair, too.

"The constellations are beautiful. Not sure they're worth dying of a cold for, but they are beautiful."

Appreciates beauty, hates the cold. Get the boy a blanket. It's interesting he remarks on their beauty rather than anything academically relevant. What a romantic.

[reinedeslys-central]

theories for survival is a talent

short bare-bones facts for anyone that hasn't heard/read the fic yet: canon divergence, hp fic, incomplete, current wc > 500k, drarry, soulmate au, canon rewrite-esque currently placed in HBP year six, about midway I think? REALLY AMAZING

I have no clue if any of this is going to make sense and most of it is probably going to be so so wrong but (SPOILERS IF YOU HAVEN'T READ UP TO CH 33 YET)

theories for siat atm:

the smiths and abotts both have a claim to hufflepuff's cup, we know a smith was the last one to have it in canon and hannah's being kinda obvious with her questions to draco

I always thought bones might be another descendant bc I've seen it in other fics but something tells me it's going to be a family line with more persian roots bc of suren // possible link to slytherin

CALLED IT I was so sure Lily was Hortensia, I wasn't expecting it to be both that's so cool!!!!

hints to voldie getting stronger and more whole the more horcruxes they nab and that's why dumbledore was roasted by snape for being scared he wouldn't be able to defeat him at full power, but hey they did it in canon so maybe? there's smth there?

so the merpeople definitely know about harry being a horcrux. going to have to reread the series bc I can't remember who else knows

blaise's secret could be SO MANY THINGS atp I don't have a solid theory yet

I was kinda wondering if zaira's soulmate was amelia bones for a hot minute and she was glamouring a soulmark, I would totally peg zaira as knowing who her soulmate is and just. not doing anything about it

flrjflkjfngjd;odg im gonna have to reread to remember what the rest of my theories were I LOVE THIS STORY SO MUCH

if anyone has other theories. please add them? I don't get to talk to anyone about how excited I am abt this fic help a guy out TT

[maxdibert]

character ask game!

21 & 26 (severus snape)

21. If you're a fic writer and have written for this character, what's your favorite thing to do when you're writing for this character? What's something you don't like?

Basically spending like half a chapter in his POV ranting about his desire to die, his internal depression, how much anything outside of his control pisses him off, or his various emotional swings. Severus is a very entertaining character because he’s incredibly introverted, which makes his internal monologue an absolute mess. And I really enjoy that because, when I write, I’m very analytical about the characters’ psyches, and he lends himself a lot to that. I also like portraying him both as a depressed, tired-of-everything guy and at the same time as someone pretty unstable and kind of pathetic because my boy is an emotional wreck, and honestly, that’s hilarious to write.

As for what I don’t like… Well, it’s not that I don’t like it, but it’s maybe a bit more challenging. It’s about aligning his internal monologue with his external actions because Severus is someone who thinks one way and acts in a completely different way depending on his goal. Trying to make that coherent in a storyline without having to explain everything as if you were making a map can be a bit of a headache. But overall, it’s fine; there’s nothing I outright dislike.

26. What's something the character has done you can't get over? Be it something funny, bad, good, serious, whatever?

Now, the biggest unpopular opinion that any Snater would crucify me for without hesitation: his outbursts in class were hilarious. I remember that before the end of the books, I didn’t explore Severus much because I didn’t care that much, although from the fifth book onward, I did feel quite a bit of sympathy for him. But man, I always thought it was absolutely hilarious how much of an asshole he could be. Like, when he tells Hermione the thing about her teeth—I know he’s an adult, and it’s wrong, but it made me laugh because, honestly, Hermione needed to be taken down a peg. Should it have been someone who wasn’t an adult? Yes, but she practically handed it to him on a silver platter. Look, I’ll admit it: when people annoy me or get on my nerves, I’m this much of a jerk too, so what can I say? Severus being the worst is my favorite Severus.

[remus-poopin]

I’ve been spamming Seriousbrat, but I think it’s time to expand my range of interviewees! I wanna hear from other marauders fans:

- who’s an introvert and who’s an extrovert?

- who is the most likely to try experimental drugs

- who was the best chess player

- who was the most likely to win a wandless fight

- who had the best fashion taste (Sirius looking good in anything does not count, we’re talking understanding of fitting, style, and rising above fads)

- who did teachers like the most (not best grades or academic performance, but who did teachers speak fondly of in the teacher’s lounge)

- who had their first kiss first

- who killed for the Order first?

- who was the most distressed about using violence?

- who wrote the best letters?

- who befriended girls first?

See ya!

Ah omg I love @seriousbrat’s answers and these always looked so fun!

- who's an introvert and who's an extrovert?

So I’m judging this on how a person regains their energy (with people vs being alone) not who is just outgoing or shy.

James - Extrovert. We don’t see a lot of James but from what we do it seems like he feeds off of people’s energies (Sirius, the crowd of students in swm, Lily and even Snape), to me I think it’s fair to extend this to his general way of interacting with the world socially.

Sirius - Introvert. Post Azkaban we see him reclusing himself in his mother’s room with buckbeak even when people are over (including Harry). I do think this is very much a result of his depression and the familiarity of being isolated for so long in Azkaban manifesting as introverted behavior. We do see him get really into entertaining guests at certain points in OOTP but in a way where he is almost forcing himself to (I do think he is happy they are there but I also think he wants to be happy they are there). So I think post Azkaban he is an introvert who is trying and failing to be extroverted due to his trauma.

It’s also possible he is pushing himself so hard into the extroverted role because that’s how he was pre Azkaban. Though, I don’t really see him pre Azkaban as particularly extroverted either. The biggest difference to me is that post Azkaban Sirius wants to be alone while pre Azkaban Sirius just wants to be with James.

Remus - Extrovert. I know people mostly peg him as an introvert but I think that has a lot to do with fanon!lupin being shy and socially awkward. In the books he is someone who excels in group settings, his talent as a teacher has a lot to do with his ability to tap so effectively into the kids’ energies to make an engaging lesson (vs an introverted Snape or McGonagall who don’t have the back and forth exchange of enthusiasm to sustain attention alone). He is also someone who absolutely needs a group of people to thrive, and unfortunately that’s not always possible for him. He does isolates himself frequently but it’s not because he wants to. He forces himself to isolate due to his own self hatred and grief. Being around the marauders, his students, and tonks is when he is at his best mentally.

Peter - Extrovert. He seems to get a lot out of being with a group of people (yes so he can feel safe but I think it’s fair to say that he also recharges his energy this way)

- who is the most likely to try experimental drugs

James or Sirius, though I definitely see Sirius going farther than James.

(If you were gonna ask who’s more likely to struggle with addiction though I’m going Sirius and Remus all the way)

- who was the best chess player

Peter or Sirius, both are incredibly clever though I think Peter is a better quick thinking strategist (I absolutely can see Peter letting Sirius win to reinforce that hierarchy that keeps him so safe in the group)

- who was the most likely to win a wandless fight

Sirius, maybe James. Lupin is too frail to do any real damage and Peter doesn’t seem like a brawler. Sirius does ram a deatheater pretty hard while fighting so I’m leaning towards him.

- who had the best fashion taste (Sirius looking good in anything does not count, we're talking understanding of fitting, style, and rising above fads)

If we’re talking muggle fashion then it’s looking pretty bleak.

Sirius and James did have those diy order of the phoenix tees that were very rock-geek chic

But lupin was serving in a distressed vintage overcoat in ootp that I am obligated to qualify as a slay.

They all suck.

- who did teachers like the most (not best grades or academic performance, but who did teachers speak fondly of in the teacher's lounge)

James!! He was bright and charming in a way that adults would love. I think McGonagall’s reaction to the Potter’s death spoke to how much she liked him.

- who had their first kiss first

I wanna say James because from what we’ve seen he seemed the most interested in romance in their time at hogwarts, but maybe you could make an argument for Sirius.

- who killed for the Order first?

Maybe Lupin? His attitude towards Harry using expelliarmus in battle speaks of someone who knows killing has to be done in war and is used to it by now.

- who was the most distressed about using violence?

I think it depends on what point of time this is and how they define violence. I believe Lupin would be the most uncomfortable with casual violence, since he was when they were at school when it was directed at Snape (while James and Sirius saw it as justified). But during the war I see James as the most uncomfortable with killing as he once saved a life of someone he hated. Peter and Sirius don’t seem to care too much overall. So I’d say James only for taking a life but not for other forms of violence.

- who wrote the best letters?

Im not sure what qualifies as a good letter but im gonna go with Sirius because his letters to Harry were fun to read

- who befriended girls first?

I feel like Remus befriended Lily before any of the others did and I also feel that he would do the best in a group of friends that were girls so I’m going with him.

[hollowwrites]

Blindsided

Part 3

Ominis x MC

Summary - Before the year kicks off Lucan gathers all available students for Crossed Wands. Not wanting his duelling club to fall by the wayside, he calls upon outside members of the club to make things…interesting.

I loved crossed wands!! Wish more of the students participated. Maybe I’ll write something for how I think each would duel?

Again feel free to swap Evelyn with MC or Y/N

Also I’m completely aware that Snape created the Muffliato charm but I thought about it and I had to do it!!

Warnings - Violence? Just a bit of duelling, just a continuation of before

Word Count - 3150

~

The next few days were rocky but things were finally looking up. Sebastian had in fact been selected for the Tri Wizard Tournament and after the initial horror, Sebastian was correct. Everyone had rallied around him to lend their aid. Poppy had suggested they tend to some of the nearby nesting Dragons due to the popularity of the Dragon Egg challenge. Garreth had promised to brew any potion that he needed with the inclusion that he would follow the instructions exactly. Despite what happened, frequently, in potions class, Garreth was a skilled Potioneer he just had a tendency to make it up as he went along.

They had the luxury of a few more weeks of prep before the games began so, for the meantime, classes continued as usual. Sebastian suspected that they put off the announcement ceremony until Evelyn had gotten back from her travels with the hopes she would put her name forward. She hadn’t, much to the chagrin of the Headmaster and many of her fellow seventh years, so the name calling ceremony took place.

Lucan Brattleby had scrambled together as many of the seventh years for the their last Crossed Wands tournament.

“I will not be upstaged by some centuries old cup” Lucan protested “Please we have to shake it up this year. Evelyn. I’m on my knees.” His hands clasped together begging for her participation

“Okay okay I’ll compete” she laughed “Honestly I think you can count on Seb too he’s not going to pass up on the opportunity to take my title AND become Tri Wizard Champion”

“Excellent, I’ve talked Imelda and Poppy into it this year, and I’ve changed the rules too. Anything goes, Imelda said she’d only do it if she could cast from her broom and so long as she stays in the Bell Tower, I’m game” Lucan practically shook from excitement “I was hoping you could try and convince Ominis to duel, you’ve seen him fight right?” He continued in hushed tones looking over at the gaggle of Slytherins collected by the practise dummies.

“Yes. He’s quite formidable, very restrained, and poised too. I’ll see what I can do”

“Ah I could kiss you!! Thank you so much. Rounds start in 10 let me know”

Evelyn began her approach but noticed Ominis walking towards her. He put a hand flat out to stop her, shaking his head.

“Before you say anything, it’s a no” he said smirking

“Oh come on Ominis, don’t you want to take Sebastian down a few pegs.”

“As I told you, multiple times in fifth year, Sebastian never backs down from a fight. I don’t fancy facing that” his eyebrows furrowed as though remembering something “…again”

“But it’s getting so boring facing Sebastian at the top, I could really use some variety” she poked at his chest exaggerating her words “Aaaaand wouldn’t you like to show Sebastian just how much he’s annoyed you these past few years. It’s a great stress relief pummelling him into the ground. Please?”

He could never say no to her.

“Okay fine…” she began clapping excitedly. “If you help me out with something afterwards”

“Of course. I’d’ve helped you anyway. Win Win for me” she bounced up to kiss him on the cheek “Can’t wait to throughly destroy you, Gaunt”

Once the sound of Evelyns footsteps disappeared into the congregation of Crossed Wands fans, Ominis turned back to his other friends, touching his cheek.

“What was that about?” Sebastian said smugly

“Could something actually happen between you two this year? I’m growing bored watching you dance around each other” he heard a soft thwack of fabric eliciting a reaction from Imelda “What? I know you think the same”

“Don’t you think I’ve had this conversation with him before. He says the same thing every single time” Sebastian said

“Can someone enlighten me as to what is going on?” Ominis asked getting more and more aggravated each passing moment

“She kissed you, you fool. I know you’re blind but you’re not stupid” Imelda said equally annoyed

“She…she does it all the time, it means nothing” he lied, that was the first time she had kissed him. It was a friendly kiss though. Nothing more. Right?

“See? Told you. Same response every time” Sebastian said exasperated. “Next he’ll say that they’re just friends and he values her friendship”

“Enough of this! This is getting childish. I’m ending this conversation before one of us says something they’ll regret” he looked in Sebastian’s general direction. He had enough on him that any number of things could spill from his mouth.

As the evening dragged on more and more people filtered in to watch the spectacle. When the duels took place a huge crowd gathered by the portcullis to peer in, some sat on brooms hovering above everyone else to get a better view. As it got closer and closer to the semi finals, the overhead walkways of the Bell Tower began filling with people too, many belonging to Durmstrang and Beauxbatons to see what Hogwarts really had to offer.

The final four ended up being a Slytherin sweep. Sebastian and Evelyn were a given, what with them being the best dualists in the school but Ominis and Imelda had surprised everyone. Ominis ended rounds quickly and decisively with little to no room for error. If you made a mistake, you lost. Imelda had also been found to be quite difficult to hit on her broom, whereas she had no trouble casting from it at all.

Imelda and Evelyn went first. Imelda stood no chance against the reigning Hogwart’s Crossed Wands Champion and every time she mounted her broom or got just barely off the ground, Evelyn slammed her back down, all while protecting her broom. She knew Imelda loved that thing and they had become quite close. A quick Accio caused it to float delicately toward Evelyn’s hands. And with that, Imelda forfeit. Surprising to everyone present, she wasn’t bitter, she jumped up, giving Evelyn’s a quick hug before taking up her broom again for the final few fights.

Next up was Sebastian and Ominis. Sebastian’s tactic was to try and overwhelm Ominis immediately and hope that, that was enough. He cast out a volley of several offensive spells to which Ominis deflected them all. He stood twirling his wand around waiting for the next volley when Sebastian apparated closer to him.

“Come on Ominis, fight back!” He growled through gritted teeth

“Ah but it’s so much more fun listening to you struggle to land a hit”

With another gruff sigh, Sebastian threw out more spells, all ended up deflected or bouncing off a well timed Protego. Ominis laughed, throwing out the first spell and landing it directly at Sebastian’s chest. The Depulso threw him back against the pile of practise dummies and with a final Descendo, the dummies crumpled against the ground, collapsing under the pressure as Sebastian looked to be struggling with gravity itself.

“I yield!!” Sebastian barked “Merlin, I never knew you had that in you” he said as Ominis offered him a hand.

“Yes you did” Ominis squeezed his hand knowingly as Sebastian took it.

“That means it’s Ominis and Evelyn in the final round Witches and Wizards. The Heir of Salazar Slytherin vs The Hero of Hogwarts” Lucan bellowed casting a general Repairo on the stage. The practise dummies ballooned back out and returned to their original position whilst the crack in the stone from Ominis’ unrelenting Descendo sealed itself over.

Whilst Imelda and Sebastian took up their positions, Ominis and Evelyn secured themselves at the front of the crowd. They had they’re heads buried together talking and Evelyn waved a hand through the portcullis to get they’re attention.

“Don’t take this too seriously you two, remember you’re fighting for third” Evelyn flashed them a grin. Ominis let out a singular laugh as she linked her arm with his. They watched the fireworks display of spells volley past them with vague interest.

“Congratulations on that win” she said squeezing his bicep “I’ve never seen someone cast Descendo continuously like that. That crack in the stone? There must have been a terrible amount of pressure on Sebastian. No wonder he conceded”

“You can see for yourself if you like. But I had something much more interesting in line for you” he cocked his head down to her ear so she could hear him over the crowd. His breathe swayed the hairs falling on the side of her face and she felt herself turning red.

Do not let a silly school girl crush destroy your winning streak.

She locked her jaw and pursed her lips. Not that he could see her sudden shift in her face, but it helped her feel more confident in her words

“Don’t let it get to your head though, you’ve just secured second best duellist in the school” her tone was mocking but he could hear the glee in her voice. He laughed breathily down her ear, sending tingles down her spine.

“Shall we see?” He ushered her forward ahead of him to the stage.

She had missed Sebastian and Imelda’s duel completely, but from their faces she gathered that Sebastian had won. He was riling up the crowd for the final duel, pacing in the front row, two fingers sticking forward from his face like a snakes tongue, hissing. Soon, the whole crowd was a sea of serpents, with the Slytherin students getting particularly into the impromptu chant.

“Ready?” Ominis mouthed from the opposite side of the room. Something about the curve of his mouth and his whole demeanour, frightened her. No it wasn’t fear. Her chest felt tight and her skin was ablaze but she wasn’t scared, more…vulnerable?

“Anything goes…right Brattleby? He asked raising his head high and rolling his sleeves. Had he always been so…arrogant? And why was she okay with it? This sort of behaviour would usually immediately turn her off, she’d seen it with Leander multiple times. But this was different. Regal. Domineering. Attractive?

With the agreement made from Lucan, he cast off the starting flare, hitting the Bell Towers pendulum and the slow chug of the portcullis lowering began. The metallic rattle shook the arena and silenced the crowd immediately.

She turned her head, assessing her surroundings and she noticed, Ominis mirrored her, exactly.

How?

She shifted her feet pacing in the opposite direction and, again, he copied her exact moves.

“Is there something a matter?” He called to her and her eyebrows furrowed.

“Enough of this” she spat, casting out a flurry of spells. As he had with Sebastian he blocked them all but he hadn’t counted on her continuing. Though she’d cast it wordlessly, he knew it was Confringo based on the light aroma of burning wood and the blast that he took to his chest. He coughed out his next breathe, patted down his tie and loosening it as he did.

“Serpensortia…” he sneered and a bright white snake fell from the tip of his wand “Engorgio” it’s tiny lithe body bubbled grotesquely until a huge snake wrapped itself around half of the court. Screams came from onlookers but Evelyn, simply giggled. So he was going to use Parseltongue. Interesting. She heard Sebastian hollering from crowd, the only other person, she suspected, who knew what he was doing.

The snakes body coiled around Ominis’ feet as it’s head hovered close to his shoulder. His fingers skimmed under the snakes jaw as he whispered in its ear, no doubt trying to hide his gift. Was she jealous of a snake right now?

Following up on its masters wishes the snakes jaw unhinged and hissed violently towards Evelyn. It shot out toward her and she laughed maniacally. She was sure the other schools would think she was mad but, snakes were always, such beautiful creatures. And under Ominis’ control she knew she didn’t have to fear it.

“I’m so sorry, Ominis, I’m going to have to kill your little pet here” she wound her wand around her fingers gathering all the ancient magic she could. As she had done many times with spiders, she pulled the beast towards her shrinking it as it flew through the air. The, now tiny, beasts body hit her hand and it flaked to blue ash, dissipating in the cool spring breeze. She looked back at Ominis, a second too late to see the purple light of Accio flying toward her. G

She felt the tug of her collar lift her slightly from the ground, the tips of her shoes dragging across the stone as Ominis yanked her towards him. His fingertips grazed the skin of her chest as he grabbed at her clothing. The telltale sting of his touch seared across her collarbone.

“You really should keep your eyes on me” he chuckled softly “Do you concede?” He asked whipping his wand to press delicately against her temple and bringing her towards him. She writhed against his grasp as she pondered her next move. There was something but it was awful to do…especially to him. Placing her free hand against his chest to stabilise herself, she flicked her wand to his ear.

“Muffliato” she spat and he immediately let go. His hands flew to his ears trying to block out the many voices he was now hearing. He smirked, eyes darting around to try and hone in on her.

“Very clever” he shot back through gritted teeth.

Though on paper it may have seemed pleasant, having his mind filled with her voice, but it was anything but. Whispers and screams all overlapped fighting for attention at the forefront of his mind, each saying a different spell or incantation. Occasionally, her voice would ring forward with his name and he would turn in its direction. An instinct he now wished hadn’t become embedded in his very core.

Evelyn snapped her fingers a few times in front of Ominis to verify if her charm had worked. No reaction. She puffed her cheeks out in a sigh of relief, but she couldn’t help but feel a little bad. She watched his eyes dart around, and his erratic movements trying to seek her out, without his most dominant sense.

“Expelliar-“ she began before being cut short.

His hand flew to around her wrist, pulling her arm up and closer to him. She stood stretched upwards in front of him as she had to his Accio, only now, he dropped his face to hers. He was mere inches away.

“I’ll ask again” he whispered “Do you concede?”

“I still have my wand…Depulso” she barked causing enough of a blast between them both that they each went flying. They both landed and took up their wands.

“Confringo!” They cast simultaneously. The spell colliding mid field and as they both maintained the cast, the flaming lashes continued between the two of them. The roaring core of their spells bled out onto the stone, blackening where it touched. They stayed locked in their tug of war for a few moments before Lucan intervened.

“Enough!” He bellowed full of joy. His voice startling them both, interrupting the spell casting. “I think we have a first here at Crossed Wands today. A DRAW. We can’t stand here all night watching you two trade blows. Congratulations to our reigning and new Crossed Wands Champions!”

The crowd sang out with uproarious applause. Evelyn smiled widely, clapping for her competitors as Ominis walked over to her. He grinned back at her and bowed deeply, before taking her hand. They raised they’re hands high and both bowed to the crowd.

~

The crowd at the Bell Tower courtyard dispersed quickly. It was late and the Great Halls feast was only moments away. Ominis, Imelda, Evelyn and Sebastian walked together for dinner, occasionally being stopped by another student to congratulate them all on how well they did.

“I’m just saying, if those two are joint first, then I’m technically, technically, still second best in the school” Sebastian argued

“I don’t think that’s how it works. Does that make me third best?” Imelda asked

“Not with that shoddy display in there, Darling” he said mockingly. Imelda scoffed and pushed him through the doors to the Great Hall.

“We’ll collect some food and we can get out of here” Ominis said, squeezing Evelyn’s shoulder indicating he was talking to her. He felt her stiffen up and then immediately relax, her hand lightly brushing across his knuckles.

“Oh I had forgotten about that. It’s late are you sure you want to do it tonight? I don’t mind helping you over the weekend? I’m free Sund-”

“Oh no no you’re not getting out of this that easily. I seem to remember you saying you would ‘thoroughly destroy me’ How did that work out for you?” he teased collecting a few pastries “I’d say you owe me double no-“ he turned and bumped into a figure stood entirely too close to him. “Watch where you’re standing” he snapped

“Oh my you are blind. Mmm well that makes your victory at your little duelling club all the more impressive” a lithe French voice rang out from below him. He furrowed his brows in confusion.

“I didn’t win” he stated matter of factly “My friend here is a formidable opponent. I share my ‘Victory’ with her” his hand gestured to where he knew Evelyn was stood. He felt a silent rage wash over him with the heat emanating from her direction.

Imelda was clutching Sebastian’s arm willing him to listen to this display. He sat mouth agape eyes darting between Ominis, Evelyn and the Beauxbatons student. Imelda grinned evilly watching Evelyn, indulging in the drama of it all.

“You are too kind, too…humble.” The beauxbaton student placed the palm of her hand against his chest, leaning further into him. His neck craned backwards as she spoke up into his face “An excellent display, one I would have obviously expected from the Noble House of Gaunt” she kissed his cheek before leaving, the click of her heels against stone conveying her giddy gait.

A sickening silence fell over the four as they awkwardly gathered food. Ominis was the first to break it.

“What in Merlin’s name was that about?”

“Seems you have an admirer” Imelda’s voice was smug as she looked at Evelyn

Don’t. Start. Evelyn mouthed. Imelda shrugged and took a swig of her pumpkin juice, wiggling her eyebrows as she did.

You okay? Sebastian asked silently, before Evelyn could answer Ominis interrupted

“I can hear you mouthing to one and other! You know I hate that” he sighed “I think I’ve had enough socialising for one day” and he turned to walk away. When he didn’t hear Evelyn’s footsteps behind him, he stopped, turned and extended his hand towards her “Still not getting out of this Eve.” His fingers twitched slightly beckoning her forward “Come”

Masterlist

[riddlesmoon]

being part of a few hermione fanfic groups on fb has been quite enlightening bc i get to see the kind of ships and dynamics that primarily cishet older women hp fans like. especially since i get to contrast it with, say, tomarry and drarry fans (mostly on twt, but some on tumblr too) and most interesting of all, cn fans. which, granted, are also mostly tomarry and drarry because, well, i also ship them so thats the kinda content im seeking out yk.

so whats interesting about it? well, to start with, i am putting this under the cut because holy shit my ass can YAPPPPP and no one actually gives a fuck but i wanna get it out even if no one reads it! Also an ever important DISCLAIMER that this is my personal opinion and is highly subject to bias and only seeing a certain sphere of people and i dont know what im talking about so please dont @ me im stupid.

as i said, theyre older (many married or with kids! they even sometimes talk to their husbands about said fics, which is... sweet), and... probably mostly het. so i would say (though i have no stats) the rough popularity of hermiones partners (in those groups specifically) are draco >>> sirius > snape, tom > rarer pairs like lucius theo dolohov viktor cedric >>> harry > ron and femslash (i will come back to this). maybe i could compare with ao3 stats later to see how well i pegged it but for now im mostly just going off popularity of certain posts and how often i see "please share fic recs of X ship")

i feel like millenial/younger hp fans would balk at the idea of sirius, snape, lucius, and dolohov, but i do think this can be chalked up to them being older and thus more interested in "adult" characters. and rarely do they talk about fics set in canon timelines, more often i see recs with time travel (which effectively solves many of the age gap problems), or otherwise set in the future, where age gap becomes less remarkable as theyre adults. marriage law or pregnancy are also common tropes...

i did wonder for a while if this was a yume/selfship phenomenon and that perhaps older western women just didnt know or use that term? after all, hermione is the most prominent female character in hp, and obviously can be very relatable since, like the reader, she is from the muggle world discovering the magical world, and a bookworm, which has a 70% chance of being true if you are a girl reading a book i think. so i was like, ah, shes can be kind of a good way to self insert into the hp universe or at least a good way find a vast amount of ship fic since shes so popular.

however i dont think this is the case—im not 100% sure of course, i asked one (1) time but it appears most of them are genuinely invested in hermione as a character and arent using her as a self insert board. not that either is bad or worse, im not passing judgement!!! though i do think it makes sense, since, from my view, the self insert phenomenon is often seen in younger fans who are less secure in their self image and want their fav to reassure them without fear of rejection soooo yk (and what does that say abt me who has a yume harem? well youre not my therapist so we dont have to talk about it)

aaaaanyway. this fucking long ass post is mostly just because i remember getting culture shock'd twice while looking thru cn comments. for example, i was surprised to see romione viewed so positively, because holy shit do those hermione fic fans fucking hate romione. and harmony next, but it isnt as bad as romione. any post asking for fic recs inevitably ends in "no romione", but cn fans think theyre kinda cute.

i have some theories. for one, they think ron is extremely unromantic. this is exacerbated by the yule ball incident, but in all honesty at no point in the books does ron really do anything romantic for hermione and in fact treats her pretty badly. the kiss at the end was, in my personal opinion, a bit random, but i dont think its an unpopular view that what ron does doesnt make up for the past years especially since the very cause he is advocating for (the house-elves) is one he has disparaged before.

of course you can argue the same for all of the other candidates, that they dont do anything romantic for her either, but i think there is a difference, because for all those candidates they dont have a "chance" in canon to pursue her (save viktor) because theyre not viewing each other as potential partners, but ron is in that position and goes about it pretty badly. for everyone else, writers can make up whatever they want! for ron, well, you have to work with (or against) what canon gave you.

next, i think a lot of them really like when hermiones prowess is appreciated. a lot of fic recs have her being quite badass or kind of holding things together (to be fair, she does this for the trio a lot) and her partner usually acknowledges her power while being on an equal or better level. so i guess that turns a lot of them off romione since he spends a lot of time in canon brushing her off while using her brains etc... being praised hits different when its a dunderhead who needs ur help vs someone just as brilliant ykyk. its not looking good.

side note on harmony: i think this suffers from a similar phenomenon in that canon gives us their friendship tgt and people have already seen that together, sparks dont fly. ofc people can make up whatever they want but when one char canonically says "i see her as a sister" you kind of have to overwrite that in your head and not everyone is willing to do that.

Sorry wtf was i talking about. uh. cn. right. so why doesnt cn have this problem? well for one i think they may be younger than this western group, which makes sense since the series is originally english so it hit foreign audiences a bit later. that and i wonder how many cn fans actually read the books vs the movies (which dilutes the aforementioned problems a lot)? the movies are def more accessible for non english fans i think. but yea i think those women, being older, are more no-nonsense and less fairytale daydream-y about their potential partner. thinking more realistically about who theyd settle down with versus younger fans who are like its fine if theyre hes silly and stupid theyre young. btw this also applies to jily which i see cn (and jp. all this applies to jp for similar non english reasons) post about more frequently; whereas in english sphere i FEEL LIKE (i must again emphasise this is all subject to bias) of the marauders i mostly only see wolfstar discussion. dgmw theres plenty of wolfstar in cn spheres!! i just also see jily where i dont in en)

And of course you can throw everything i said out the window because its not like i have a particularly extensive or wide range of sample data. very little actually. i just. noticed stuff. and was surprised. and want to TALK. Arugh

[futurequibblerjournalist]

Why is only bottom Barty getting hate? Like Snape is CANONICALLY desperate for control and would probably blow a wire if someone asked him to bend over but Barty, who has been beaten his entire life and needs someone to trust (yk that whole CANON reason be joined Voldemort)... isn't allowed? Like only one of them gets to take it up the ass even though one makes way more sense than the other. And I hate to say it but I just know it's because so many hc Evan as trans. Like just come out and say it so we know who to unfollow: you still see Evan as a girl and don't think girls can give it. Evan could even ride it or peg. Plus they're literally magic? Like that's the whole thing? For all we know he was a metamorphmagi. Maybe Veela take on appearances most attractive to their soulmate, so even if Evan is trans, he'd have a hell of a clit. Barty would Def treat it like a dick.

You’re so real for this anon and you’re so right for it too. People have no problem having Sev a bottom and then complaining about bottom Barty. Also, as much as we all hate canon and all that, that’s literally where we get our characterisations for certain characters from so completely disregarding them is just,,, mhmm well it’s a little foolish to me idk

I fear part of it is definitely transphobia. Like 100%. Which is so odd to me because how can you be so transphobic that it spills over onto creators who write them both as cis???

There are so many ways we could make trans Evan top Barty and honestly I feel even more passionately about trans Evan being into topping than I do cis Evan. Did I always feel this way? No, not necessarily, but now it’s pissing off transphobes so 🤷🏻‍♂️ let Barty ride that t-dick

Honestly at this point I’m getting closer and closer to writing something with trans Evan topping the shit out of Barty just because it’ll annoys these people lmaooo

[slytherinqueen123]

fight club.

-y/n's pov-

"no, no, no. don't you three go get in a fight, it's really isn't a big deal at all." i rush forwards, blocking the door.

draco sneers at me. "move, y/n."

"no!" i exclaim, throwing my arms out so that no one can barge past. "you're not going out there to defend my honour when i don't have an honour to be defended. she just called me a slut. it's not like she threatened to fight me!"

blaise swallows hard and nods. i raise an eyebrow at malfoy and he gives a relatively similar reaction to blaise. the only one who hasn't said anything is theo.

"mattheo? do you understand?" i say coolly. he sighs, rolls his eyes and moves to sit on a chair. the other two follow. "thank you." i add, sitting down across from pansy, who's been watching the whole ordeal.

"hey, when did snape say we had to be-" i'm cut off by scuffling as the boys all get up and run out the door. "HEY! WAI-" i dash after them. theo stops at the door and leans back in.

"you promised!" i whine.

"yeah. i promised to protect you. love you, princess." he winks at me and sprints after the boys.

i flop back down on the couch near pansy, and give her a look.

"you know what's gonna happen? they're gonna get mad and agree to some stupid fight club. then i'm gonna have to shake my ass at somebody to get them out." i roll my eyes.

"thats why we love you, honey." she jokes. i roll my eyes at her. bitch.

“please, like i don’t fucking know it. you wanna take a guess at how many times a day i get called an attention seeking whore? i have to hide all that from them or every boy in this damn school will have his eyes gouged out if he so much as looks in my direction.” i huff. pansy nods along, sipping a coffee and twirling her hair. she seems like she has all the time in the world for my trauma dumping, so i keep going.

“like, i love them, i really do. we’ve been friends since god knows when, and they’re like my brothers. i just wish they were more… gentle and less fight me, yknow?”

parkinson is still zoned out, absently mindedly bobbing her head every few seconds. i sigh.

“see ya pansy.” i get up and go to my dorm, faintly hearing a, “yeah, bye.”, echoing up the stairs behind me.

• • •

-mattheo’s perspective-

“WHAT?” i roar, backing parkinson up into the corner. “she said WHAT?”

blaise tugs at my collar, slightly pulling me back. pansy cowers in the corner. “i don’t know, that’s just what she told me. she said you guys would kill everyone. i’m sorry, i don’t know more.” she whispers, the joy of being involved with our drama fading away and she watches out faces darken.

“can i go now?” she mumbles, not making eye contact. i step aside and she runs out the common room door.

“fucking snake.” blaise hisses. i turn. “what?” i ask, still turning over the possibility of going out right now and grabbing any guy who i’m suspicious of and demanding answers. “she’s a snake. a sly little one, too.”

draco looks confused, and i doubt i look any better. “why? why is she a snake?”

blaise sighs. “because, y/n would’ve told her all that to get it off her chest, and pansy’s reaction is to come and spread around everything she said? that’s a bitchy move, especially since y/n wouldn’t have been thinking about pansy doing that.”

i raise an eyebrow. “oh, she’s just doing it for attention. the latest drama of y/n y/l/n will make her the most popular witch in slytherin for a hot minute. that’s all she wants.”

malfoy is still looking dumbfounded. “huh?” blaise and i share a look.

“ugh, never mind. maybe you’d understand if you where less blonde.”

• • •

“good godric guys, you could’ve knocked!” y/n huffs, rolling her eyes at us and pegging a book.

“y/n, we need to talk.”

“about you barging into my personal quarters? yeah, we do need to talk about th-”

“not about that. y/n, this is serious. we need to talk.”

her face pales a bit, and she starts aggressively rubbing blush on her cheeks. “oh? what do we need to talk about?” she says, her voice high and pitchy.

blaise gives me a look and steps forward. “y/n, please stop. we know.” she keeps on pushing the brush over her face, even though there’s no product left on it.

“what do you know? why do you think you know something? what do you know?” she says coolly.

“y/n, quit playin-” i start. blaise puts a hand on my chest and pushes me back. he goes over to y/n and turns her to face him.

“hey.” he says softly. she refuses to meet his eyes. “hi.”

he lets the brush from her fingers and puts it gingerly on the counter. “y/n, are you ok?”

we watch as her eyes dart everywhere but looking at blaise. he grabs her chin slightly and pulls her gaze back to him. raising an eyebrow, he silently asks her the question again.

“yes.”

a small smile creeps onto his face. “good. now, i want you to listen to me, ok.” she nods. “if any poor excuse of a wizard says any of those things to you again, i will personally kick escort them to hell. and if they deserve it, i will let mattheo beat their asses. and malfoy changed them. ok?” the smile is gone.

“yes.”

i sit myself on the foot of the bed, malfoy following. we stare at the scene playing out in front of us. best man, drug lord, chronic fight starter and nose crusher blaise zabini talking oh-so softly to miss independent, don’t take no bull, kick your ass on the way to a show y/n.

what has our world come to.

• • •

queen note - i know this one finished kinda abruptly, but i really needed something to post, so i might come back an edit it later. love yous 😘

[pokemon-ash-aus]

Team R fled:

Okay, if Meowth got into team R as kitten, so he and Gio's persian are know each other longer...

I can't help it, but see parallel between Giovanni & persian and Ash&Meowth. Like imagine both Gio and Persian scolding those two? It's just Persian being equivalent of Professor Snape from Harry Potter to Meowth, lol😅

I mean, it's often happens that older cats being tsunderes towards new kittens in the house

I dont get that reference XD

But yeah! Meowth only got in probably a month or so than he did in canon. Saying he was a Kitten refers to an older time when he was younger.

But it's less of a fun scolding and it's more of a brutal one. While Gio gives out tongue lashings to Ash, Persian is more than capable of knocking Meowth down a few hundred Pegs especially since the duo are no where near Giovanni's level for a long time.

[bccksmarts]

❧ From Parent to Teen Prompts ☙

➤ @officerwaltons asked: “ i’m going to give your professor a good taste of his own medicine. ” — james potter [parent/teen prompts !]

   ❝Mister Potter—❞ Hermione winced, almost actually groaning. The sentiment of James' words were lovely, him wanting to stick up for her because Snape, once again, had pinpointed how ❛insufferable❜ she was, purely for wanting to learn. As much as she'd love for Snape to be knocked down a peg, she also didn't want it to effect her grade in any possible way.

   They say that teachers aren't meant to be biased, but everyone knew otherwise. Some of them always had a favourite student, and Snape's would always be Draco Malfoy, even if his face showed to be as emotionless as a sheet of clear parchment.

   That went without saying, even parchment showed much more enthusiasm than Severus Snape tended to.

   Shaking her head, Hermione tried again, ❝Please—you mustn't. I'd rather not get reprimanded, nor have it come back on you... or Harry.❞ As the saying goes: ❛𝐆𝐔𝐈𝐋𝐓𝐘 𝐁𝐘 𝐀𝐒𝐒𝐎𝐂𝐈𝐀𝐓𝐈𝐎𝐍❜, and not that James would mean any ill intent. Justice, if anything. Her, Harry and co. would see it as that, but that didn't mean that the rest of the school would.

[sofiadragon]

I find it mildly more amusing to think that this is Snape's normal personality, so he talks like this to other Death Eaters. He doesn't challenge Voldemort directly, that would be stupid and he would get crucio-level upset, but if he wasn't being a little shit to Malfoy and the Lestrange brothers that would be out of character. Voldemort likes him being a little shit. Snape brings those rich snobs down an extra peg since while they could all rationalize Voldemort being so far above them, Snape coming up from the gutter to be a brilliant inventor and highly valued member of his inner circle just shits into their taco.

Voldemort might even laugh at Snape's jokes. Remember that he was a loyal and valued follower until Lily was on the line, though he may also be included in those Sirius talked about who got cold feet once Voldemort ramped up the violence. The Death Eaters as a cult drew Snape in by giving him what he was desperate for: appreciation, community, and validation. Voldemort thinking Snape's vicious sarcasm and sass are hilarious explains why this is the only time we see Voldemort hesitant to kill someone. He doesn't care enough to spare Snape or entertain any alternative plans of action, but he isn't enthusiastic or even blase about killing Snape. He wishes he didn't have to do it, and I think that speaks a lot to why Snape originally joined the Death Eaters.

Snape sassing Umbridge is especially hilarious when you remember that this is the man who went undercover with Voldemort for years and never let his facade crack even once. Not even the time Voldemort fed one of his colleagues to a snake right in front of him.

Her vibes really were that rancid. You know it was like:

Dumbledore: Since I may be forced from this school it is imperative that you conceal your true loyalties from Dolores Umbridge. You must make her believe she can count on your support.

Snape: Of course. This will be easy compared to pretending to be a loyal Death Eater while spying on the Dark Lord, the man who murdered the love of my life.

*A short time later*

Umbridge: But you were unsuccessful?

Snape: .... "Obviously." 🙄 🙄 🙄 ugh how is she this insufferable?

* * *

Umbridge: YOU ARE ON PROBATION!

Snape: smh so done with this *mocking bow*

[hprecfest]

Day 7: the best of your OTP

Study in Snape (149,587 words) by LydiaClairvoyanne on AO3

Harry/Severus

Harry Potter is a coddled, spoiled Heir Potter Black in a setting where he vanquished Lord Voldemort as a 15 months old baby, Lily and James Potter have never died, and Albus Dumbledore is not as important as he thinks he is. Severus Snape is a genius, yes, but also a scared, insecure, abused, neglected, misunderstood, poor, bitter, snarky, jealous, broken man. At least, that's how everyone see him - everyone, but Harry Potter.

The Road to Happiness (77,601 words) by DennaSnape on AO3

Harry/Severus

Harry Potter is an Auror, in fact, he's Head of Department. That should make him happy, right? But his world's crumbling around him, the stress of the job and the stress of three kids he'd had to make Ginny happy means he's relying on calming draughts and cheering charms. And when Ginny leaves him he all but falls apart. Until Minerva and Kingsley plot to get him out of his funk. Everyone knows Harry Potter should have been a teacher, and with Horace set to retire, Hogwarts will be needing a new Defence Against the Dark Arts teacher. So Harry apprentices under Severus, the two of them settling into tipsy banter that involves a lot of innuendo.

Riddle of the Midnight Sky (110,791 words) by Arrisha on AO3

Harry/Severus

Harry Potter takes care of a man he hates in a broken universe.

empire builders (25,216 words) by shecrows on AO3

Sirius/James || on DW

Say, James, he rehearses in his head. Remember that time we were both roaring drunk at the end of term, and you put your cock in my mouth, and I came so hard I still get tingly thinking about it? Was that just a one off, d’you think, or did you want to do it again sometime? He blows out a cloud of smoke, releasing a thready little peal of laughter. “Fuck me,” Sirius mutters, and swallows. “Fuck. Shitting Christ.” James, Sirius, and a summer in the south of Devon.

Thread (4,796 words) by Anise on AO3

Sirius/James || on DW

Two boys, barefoot in jeans, going skinny dipping on a hot summer day.

XX Love Story (3,395 words) by gunsandbutter on AO3

Sirius/James || on DW

Some had crawled their way into your heart, to rend your ventricles apart. It walks like a duck. It talks like a duck. It is not a fucking duck.

Recipes for the Lost and Lonely (19,843 words) by phresine on AO3

Draco/Ron || on DW

Draco can bake cheesecakes to cheer you up, and cream puffs to calm you down, but has yet to bake a cake that can ward against loneliness. Ron stocks Foe-Glasses to tell you when your enemies are behind you, and Sneakoscopes for when those who would wish you ill are near, but nothing that can show you a person's true self.

Conservatory (2,498 words) by copperbadge on AO3

Draco/Ron || on DW

Someone had written a revisionist history book claiming that the idea for the piano was stolen from a wizarding instrument of great antiquity. Draco had to admit that anything involving stringing cat's guts on pegs and pounding them with hammers did seem about in the Pureblood line.

Unless You’re Choosing Me (31,412 words) by The_HouseRyn on AO3

Draco/Ron || on DW

A soulmate was a choice. It was two people deciding to spend the rest of their lives together, weathering any storm. That was a fact that Ron would hold as truth for the rest of his life. Even when the Unspeakables found a spell in some ancient text that tied soulmates together with a red cord and showed them a moment of their "true love". It was a hoax, he was sure of it. But no one else agreed, willing to upend their lives just because a stupid spell said so. Ron wouldn't have minded so much if it hadn't wrecked his.

Orchards (15,203 words) by whinlatter on AO3

Harry/Ginny || on DW

The orchard is a wild, thousand-flower, crumpled-gate, fall-down-fence sort of place, where things grow that you never asked for, that you’d never expect. The summer of ’96, the story of something flowery he thought he might have smelled at the Burrow. Canon-compliant, oneshot, summer between OotP and HBP. Non-linear narrative, flashbacks/flash-forwards to DH. Harry/Ginny.

pity the living (15,482 words) by Poljupci on AO3

Hermione/Harry/Ron || on DW

When moving into a new flat, it's normal to check the bedrooms for space, the bathrooms for mould and the kitchen for that indescribable thing that will drive your loved ones in even when nothing is cooking on the stove. Harry, Ron and Hermione, though, should have been much more concerned about the state of their living room because, whether they knew it or not, all of the important bits are going to happen right in the centre of a space they may yet to grow to call their home. or: a look into the Golden Trio surviving their first year after the end of the War

Heal Thyself (46,905 words) by astolat on AO3

Harry/Severus

"Are you going for the course?" Lovegood asked. "You have the NEWTs.” “What course?” Draco said, then, “No, don’t be ridiculous,” when he realized she meant the notice pinned up on the board he’d been staring at: Applicants To The Introductory Mediwizard Course For The Coming Term Shall Present Themselves In The Chief Mediwizard’s Office By August 24th. “Oh, I thought you might,” she said. “Well, goodbye.” And off she wandered again in her addled way.

So it is (1,806 words) by Threadbear on AO3

Harry/Severus

Harry Potter was getting married tomorrow. He was thrilled.

[emeraldspiral]

Literally, the only time she was nice to a student was when she praised Zita for insulting Dib in class and the only other time she was pleased by anyone it was when Countess von Verminstrasser tore Dib a new asshole in front of the whole class and said he disgusted her. At Parent Teacher night she tells her former students, including fellow teacher Mr. Elliot, that they're all nothing, opposes the students being allowed to celebrate Valentine's Day, and delights in telling her students that their parents have received phone calls instructing them to love their kids less.

Her disposition is right in her her name. She's bitter. She doesn't want to see students succeed. She isn't teaching her kids about how society is a perilous house of cards because she wants her students to be socially aware and better prepared to face the world and fix its corruption. She's telling them all that stuff to demoralize them. She's a miserable person using her position to spread around as much misery as possible. I think she singles out Dib in particular not just because he's disruptive (though that doesn't help) but because they have kind of a Snape and Hermione antagonism between them where she can't stand how intelligent and self-confident Dib is because it takes away from the power she has over him. So she's always looking for ways to undercut his self-esteem to knock him down a peg. If she can't scare him and make him cry like her other students with her death glares and doom and gloom lectures and can't make him feel stupid because he never gets a question wrong, she'll just find any excuse to punish him (even for something Zim did, as in Rise of Zitboy) or encourage others to bully him, or coldly dismiss his questions, or make him take a 62 pound hall pass to see the nurse.

It's also possible that Ms. Bitters singles out Dib in particular because while she resents all of her students who still have a chance at growing up happy and well-adjusted with fulfilling careers and loving relationships while she's forever bitter and alone, stuck in an underpaid, dead-end job that she hates, Dib in particular she sees as someone likely to end up rich, powerful, successful, and happy in a way she never can be. She hates him because deep down she's afraid that when he grows up she won't be able to call him "nothing" and have him actually believe it. He's either going to get over the paranormal obsession and become a hugely successful and universally beloved scientist like his father, or somehow actually accomplish his dreams while she forever laments her failed aspirations of being an astronaut and a fairy princess and her failed romance with her one-time Valentine.

It would not surprise me in the least if Ms. Bitters actually knows Zim is an alien and doesn't care. Because as long as someone's suffering, whether it's Zim suffering from constant repeated failures, Dib suffering from no one believing him and constantly being gaslit, or the whole world suffering because Zim managed to succeed, she's happy either way.

Sometimes I see this interpretation/Headcanon in the IZ fandom that, like, Ms. Bitters has some sort of fondness for Zim based both of his military-like obedience toward authority figures making him a very well-behaved kid

And the fact that since he’s in Skool for his information-gathering, he’s basically the only student in Skool actually invested in learning.

But… as funny as this idea is… honestly, I don’t think it’s that well-supported by the text of the show.

I mean, yeah, sometimes that Irken deterrence to those higher-ranking (and taller) than you does leak to Zim’s interactions with Ms. Bitters. But… like, Zim isn’t even good at obeying the wishes of his literal god-emperors whose approval he’s obsessed with. There are plenty of times where he argues with Ms. Bitters, interrupts her lessons or generally annoys her. 

And, like, Zim isn’t always super-invested in Skool either. (Probably primarily when the subject isn’t Earth-specific, like astrophysics or math.)

 But more importantly… When Zim is eager to study and learn, I don’t think that wins him that many points with Ms. Bitters. 

Because Ms. Bitters hate… Well, she hates everything, but she especially hates teaching. Like, she’s specifically not an exaggeration of the kind of evil, mean teacher who is overly strict and cruel for the sake of pushing their students to academic success. She’s the kind of evil, mean teacher who hates teaching and hates her students and does not care about whether or not they actually learn anything from her lessons.

Like, okay, in-universe, Ms. Bitters might just be evil because she’s an undying shadow demon who feeds on misery or whatever - but she’s also supposed to be a stand-in to the kind of teacher who is so overworked and underpaid and generally emotionally drained that whatever interest she might’ve had in actually teaching has disappeared a long time ago and now all she cares about is getting her lesson done with and venting her frustrations at her students. 

So there is nothing for her to appreciate about a student that is actually trying to learn, and is interrupting her lessons/rants just to ask her some questions about the world. Ms. Bitters always reacts with nothing but apathy and frustration when both Zim and Dib ask her any sort of question in class. Even in the rare times where those questions could be seen as a genuine interest in learning.

And we have no evidence that the students she actually likes/tolerate (like Zita) ever ask lesson-relevant questions. She might just like/tolerate it because they sit down and stay quiet when she wants them too.

And if there’s one thing Zim is very bad at, it’s sitting down and staying quiet.

[zealouspickleeggdragon]

why did you feel the need to revive the pegging post 😐

Because the movement lives on.